#and he did ask me about the 23rd

[ohemgeeitscoley]

Can someone please explain to me why my husband is mad at *me* because he just requested the wrong time off for Christmas?

[inkskinned]

hello. you left a neon pink post-it with pgs 194-359 due 9/12 in the book, by the way. it is now May 23rd and the library's printer is running out of ink. it jammed and tore my passport application. one of the librarians dutifully blacked out all my information (front and back!) before proceeding to use every unmarred inch as scrap paper.

i think maybe our (plural, inclusive) lives are connected. all of them. i have been thinking a lot about borrowing. about how people move through the world in waves, filling in the same spaces. i have probably stood on the same subway platform as you. we held the same book. all of us stand in the same line at the grocery, at the gas station. how many feet have stood washing dishes in my kitchen?

i hope you are doing well. the pen you used was a nice red, maybe a glitter pen? you have loopy, curling handwriting. i sometimes wonder if it is true that you can tell a personality by the shape of our letters. i'm borrowing my brother's car. he's got scrangly engineer handwriting (you know the one). it's a yellow-orange ford mustang boss. when i got out of the building, some kids were posing with it for a selfie. i felt a little bird grow in me and had to pause and pretend to be busy with my phone to give them more time for their laughing.

i have a habit of asking people what's the last good book you read? the librarian's handwriting on the back of my smeared-and-chewed passport application says the glass house in small undercase. i usually go for fantasy/sci fi, but she was glowing when she suggested it. i found your post-it on page 26, so i really hope you didn't have to read up to 359 in that particular book. i hope you're like me and just have a weird "random piece of trash" "bookmark" that somehow makes it through like, 58 books.

i wish the concept of soul mates was bigger. i wish it was about how my soul and your soul are reading the same work. how i actually put down that book at the same time you did - page 26 was like, all exposition. i wish we were soul mates with every person on the same train. how magical to exist and borrow the same space together. i like the idea that somewhere, someone is using the shirts i donated. i like the idea that every time i see a nice view and say oh gosh look at the view, you (plural, inclusive) said that too.

the kids hollered when i beeped the car. oh dude you set off the alarm, oh shit is she - dude that's her car!! one was extremely polite. "i like your car, Miss. i'm sorry we touched it." i said i wasn't busy, finish up the pictures. i folded your post-it into a paper crane while i waited. i thought about how my brother's a kind person but his handwriting looks angry. i thought about how for an entire year i drove someone to work every day - and i didn't even think to ask for gas money. my handwriting is straight capital letters.

i thought about how i can make a paper crane because i was taught by someone who was taught by someone else.

the kids asked me to rev the engine and you know i did. the way they reacted? you would have thought i brought the sun from the sky and poured it into a waterglass. i went home smiling about it. i later gave your post it-turned-bird to a tiny child on the bus. she put it in her mouth immediately.

how easy, standing in your shadow, casting my own. how our hands pass over each other in the same minor folds. i wonder how many of the same books you and i have read. i wonder how many people have the same favorite six songs or have been in the same restaurant or have attended the same movie premier. the other day i mentioned the Book Mill from a small town in western massachusetts - a lot of people knew of it. i wonder if i've ever passed you - and didn't even notice it.

i hope whatever i leave behind makes you happy. i hope my hands only leave gentle prints. i hope you and i get the same feeling when the sun comes out. soulmates across all of it.

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Hi. Could you write a rafe smut with 16 and 7 ‘’Be a good girl and spread your legs.’’ + ‘’Does that turn you on?’’

Here it is, part 2 of Rave x Thornton!reader (part 1 here)

Warnings: 18+, smut, p + v, mention of oral (f receiving)

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

It was past 1am when the boys came home from the club. Judging by the voices, Topper's 23rd birthday had been well celebrated. Your brother didn't abuse alcohol very often, but you could hear his drunk voice talking to Rafe in the hallway. 

 You laughed quietly. Happy birthday, Top!

You heard his door close, then shortly after Rafe's opened. He didn't turn on the big light, moving around in his bedroom as he was taking off his clothes and tossing them in a corner before going into his en-suite bathroom for a quick shower. 

When he came out of his shower, that’s when he noticed you in his bed. 

‘’What are you doing in here?’’ he asked, a white towel wrapped around his waist. 

You didn’t move from the comfort of his pillows. ‘’I told you I was taking your bed.’’

‘’I never agreed to that. Get out.’’ Rafe dropped his towel and opened one of his dresser’s drawers to pull out a pair of clean underwear. He didn't care that you saw anything. It was nothing you hadn't seen before - or tasted.

You propped yourself up on the pillows, grinning mischievously. ‘’Come on, Rafe, you’re really gonna kick me out at this hour of the night? I’m already in bed.’’

‘’I don’t care. I don’t let people sleep in my bed.’’ He walked to his bed and yanked the covers from you, catching the small matching pink pajama set you were wearing. It was hugging your figure in a way that made his cock twitch. ‘’Take a pillow and get out. I have shit to do in the morning.’’ 

‘’I’m not sleeping on the fucking couch,’’ you said stubbornly, tipping your head up to look at Rafe. 

The latter groaned, his patience wearing thin at this hour of the night. Without warning, he reached down and firmly grabbed your ankles, roughly pulling you towards the edge of the bed. 

You grabbed at the sheets, trying to resist his grip, but he was stronger. ‘’What are you doing—’’

‘’Getting you out myself.’’ 

‘’I'm not leaving,’’ you repeated, pushing at his hands and kicking your legs and feet. ‘’Let go of me, Rafe.’’ 

In the midst of your erratic movements, one particular hard pull made Rafe lose balance and topple over you on the bed. The scene felt right out of a cliché enemies to lovers rom-com. Your first instinct was to push him off you, but then it came to your realization that you could use this position to your advantage. 

‘’Let's make a deal,’’ you suggested, trying to ignore the heavy body on you. ‘’Earlier, we got interrupted before I could fulfill my second part of the agreement. So, how about I let you fuck me and you let me stay here?’’ 

‘’Absolutely no—’’ 

Before he could finish his sentence or get up, you pushed your hips up, purposely rubbing your bottom halves together. Although there was thin cotton separating both, the contact made Rafe groan — and his cock stiffen. He usually didn't get hard so fast, but the alcohol in his blood was making his hormones increase. 

‘’What was that? I didn’t hear,’’ you asked with a teasing smile, tilting your head to the side. 

A mix of desire and frustration filled the blue eyes looking down at you. He was trying to resist your advances, but Rafe was a guy and he was having a full on cock to brain dilemma. 

You gasp when his mouth crashed on yours. You won.

There was nothing slow or sweet about this kiss. It was rough and passionate and heated, just mouths smashing into each other. Exactly what you expected from Rafe Cameron after getting his patience tested by his best friend's little sister. 

His hand ghosted over your jawline, along the side of your neck, and then you felt him wrap it around your throat just lightly enough that you noticed it. Rafe broke the kiss, his blue eyes looking right into yours. No one ever did this to you, but you didn’t hate it. Your lips curled into a devilish grin, waiting for his next move.  

‘’I’m gonna show you how I deal with little bitches like you.’’ 

Rafe’s words had you dripping between your legs. Some girls preferred to be good, but it wasn’t your case. You liked to tease and get punished. 

He nudged your knees apart with his and you melted into his touch, mewling when he pressed against your clothed clit. ‘’Does that turn you on?’’ 

You pushed your hips against him to get more friction, but he removed his knee and stood to get a condom. One thing about Rafe was that he never hooked up with a girl bare. 

‘’This needs to come off,’’ Rafe said when he returned to the bed. He peeled off your pajama shorts and panties in one go. ‘’Be a good girl and spread your legs.’’ 

You spread your legs as wide as they’ll go, giving him the perfect view of how dripping wet your pussy was. Being completely exposed like this should be embarrassing, but if your legs could open wider, you would. You clenched around nothing, feeling Rafe's eyes on you.

‘’Look at that,’’ he said, giving your pussy a tap that echoed in the room. You squirmed at the contact, secretly wanting him to do it again. ‘’Looks better from the vip seat.’’ He then pulled at your pajama top up to free your tits and palmed your breasts as his fingers rolled your nipples, pinching it hard.

You hissed and his face bored the meanest smirk as he ripped the foil packet. He jerked himself a few times before rolling on the condom. 

You were about to be completely ruined. 

Rafe teased your clit with his tip, but plunged his cock into your cunt before you could push back against him for more. It would be a lie if you said it didn't hurt, your tight walls hugging every inch of his cock. 

You had been thinking of this since Topper interrupted you in the afternoon. How his cock would feel inside you. And now it was finally happening.

You grabbed at the bedsheets until the discomfort subsided, pleasure slowly taking over as Rafe began to thrust. You gasped in pleasure, clenching around him.  

He folded your legs for a deeper angle and groaned, looking down and watching his thick cock disappearing in and out of you. ‘’Such a good pussy. Surprised it’s still so tight after getting stretched out so often.’’

The urge to slap him was strong, but every thrusts felt so good that if you opened your mouth, only high pitched cries would come out. He may be an asshole, but the dick was good. 

Getting bored with this position, Rafe pulled out and flipped you over like a ragdoll, your bare ass raised in the air. You didn’t get time to register what was happening; Rafe wasted no time and began pounding you from behind, his big hands gripping your hips. You pressed your face in the mattress to muffle your moans, terrified that Topper would hear on the other side of the hallway. He was likely sleeping like the dead, but you didn’t want to risk it.

It was a matter of minutes before you felt close to your edge, the sounds of wet slapping of skin mixing with Rafe’s low groans echoing in the room. You reached below you to rub your throbbing neglected clit, but Rafe grabbed your hand with a vice grip and pushed you down on the mattress, holding you down as he pounded his last thrusts. 

When he was done, Rafe pulled out and threw the used condom in the trash, then flopped on his bed and pulled the covers over himself, leaving you there. ‘’Good night.’’ 

‘’Are you being serious?’’ 

Rafe looked at you, amused by how mad you looked. ‘’Aw, you haven’t cum yet?’’ 

You narrowed your eyes at him. He knew. He was doing this on purpose. 

‘’Get over here. Sit on my face, I’m tired.’’

—

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[lionheartedmusings]

hi everyone! i talked about my new "dream job" very briefly a few times, but turns out you really shouldn't count your chickens before they hatch. i debated not saying anything multiple times, and frankly perhaps i should've kept quiet, but i refuse to let this situation eat me up and i feel like the community also deserves some transparency on some things that realistically, you'll never get unless people speak up. i want to preface this by stating very, very clearly that everyone that i met in the studio on a personal level is incredibly talented, passionate, and kind. all of them deserve much, much better than the way they get treated. i applied to be a writer for quackity studios / qsmp and got an email back on the 18th of january. i interviewed for the position on the 23rd of january, and entered trial period on the 28th after signing an "nda".

early during trial period, i asked one of my supervisors about payment and was told they weren't responsible for that and didn't know, but would get back to me as soon as they knew which never ended up happening (i do not blame them at all, they’re incredibly busy people). i should've pressed further, but as someone in a very, very sensitive financial situation and someone who loves the qsmp and admires the talent of everyone who poured their heart and soul into the project, i chose to wait and expect the best. i was officially welcomed into the studio on the 10th of february, and while i waited to be contacted regarding a contract or payment, i had to once again ask (even after i was already working) about payment. i was redirected to "the" head admin as it was him who handled payment, and had to wait days for him to log on so i could add him as a discord friend and ask about my salary. during that conversation, which took almost a week from start to finish, i was asked multiple times if i'd worked professionally as a writer or freelancer (to which the answer was no) before finally being offered between 200-250 dollars (which i later found out shakes out to 170€) per month. i had to ask how i was being paid, and of my own accord provide him with my paypal email in hopes of a response as he never made it clear to whom i should send it. i was incredibly lucky compared to so many members of that team, because i did get paid for my work over that month, even if it felt like i had to beg for compensation that had been promised to me before. it was an awful salary, but i was desperate and so excited to be a part of the team that i accepted the conditions. after léa's tweets, the response "jay" posted, and quackity's emergency stream, i heard once from a supervisor that things were on hold but we'd be informed of any changes. to this day, there has not been any communication either publicly on the discord server or privately, even though i asked a supervisor privately for any possible updates on anything. there's been absolute radio silence. i want to add that i do not in any way blame my supervisors for any of their lack of communication, as they've been nothing but kind and caring towards me and i imagine they'd say something if they could. i have nothing but the utmost respect for them. a few days ago (and i apologize for not being precise with the date but i wasn't checking these things closely as i had no reason to) i noticed that my access to just about everything on the server apart from the announcement channel had been removed, and the only role i retained was the main "writer" one. upon checking, the other writers on the team still retain all of their previous roles. for some reason i do not know nor understand, my access got removed without any sort of word, communication, dm, anything. anything i've ever learnt about this situation, i learnt in the middle of the night live on twitch.tv while i waited to see if i still had a job or not. the only reason i can find for my access being removed and not the other writers is the fact that i'm friends with pomme's admin. i do not know if that is why, it's merely my own speculation, but it's the only link i can see that would lead to that decision. i hope i'm wrong, but hope hasn't gotten me very far in this yet. yesterday, i quit.

i only applied in the first place because i love the qsmp. i love this community, i love this project, and i genuinely and wholeheartedly wanted to help build it as well as be able to in some way support myself while being creative. i'm not making this post because i hate quackity and want to see anything burn — i'm just exhausted, and stressed, and losing sleep over a business that ultimately does not care for the people that made it a reality. i could not in good conscience not say something, because while i was very lucky that my time there was short and while i made friends there that i believe i will take with me for the rest of my life, i've never been someone who can sit and watch others be mistreated so blatantly and just ignore it. i honestly and sincerely hope that moving forward, things change, but after what i've seen i have very little hope left in me. this isn't just about the exploitation of people, or just about not providing people with payment for their work — it's about treating other human beings who are killing themselves and working themselves to the bone with the very minimum of care and respect. it's about people who made the qsmp what it is being discarded and disrespected constantly, and who live in fear and anxiety. these people deserve to be treated well, and that lack of respect hasn't changed regardless of any "announcements" made. my heart and full and complete support goes out to everyone who is dealing with these very unfortunate circumstances and treatment (my dms are always open if you ever want to reach out), to léa for being so incredibly brave and putting herself in the line of fire for the tens of people still in the studio, to all the actors and the twitter teams for the absolute silence they've received as payment for their hard work over almost a year, and to pomme's admin who despite what's going around on twitter has not received any contact from anyone in the studio yet, and deserves so so much better.

it’s my most sincere hope that qsmp thrives and conditions change, because everyone there deserves that. everyone there deserves to be treated like gold because they’re some of the best people i’ve ever met. i wish it didn’t feel like we have to put ourselves in the line of fire publicly for any sort of response because clearly staying silent hasn’t helped anything.

please, support the people who spoke out and support the people still in the project. they're the ones who made the qsmp the qsmp. they're the ones you should be standing with first and foremost.

[thewulf]

Not Just Pals || Jake "Hangman" Seresin

Summary: Request - Hello darling! I have a request for you if you don't mind... It's a hangman x fem! Reader pen pals to friends to lovers kind of thing. Like maybe when he was in the academy someone put his name in this program to write to college students but joke on them because he got paired with reader and they hit it off almost instantly... Read Rest Here

A/N: Whew! This one was for whatever reason really tough to write! I changed it up a little bit but I hope you guys still enjoy it. :)

Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Female Reader

Word Count: 3.9k +

T/W : Self-doubt

October 9th, 2014

Hi There Y/N,

I’m not sure how you’re really supposed to start one of these things? How are you supposed to go about talking to somebody you’ve literally never met before? Although the Navy/Army pen pal thing could be interesting. I’ll be honest, my buddy signed me up and I didn’t think I’d actually write anything down but then I got the email with your name on it, Cadet Y/N Y/L/N. Consider myself intrigued.

What’s it like up in New York? Is it cold? Do you get a lot of snow? It gets awfully cold down here in Maryland, so I have to imagine how cold it gets up there. I’m from Texas so I’m still adjusting to this weather… four years later. It’s not easy. I think it’s the hardest part of living in the northeast. I’d rather run a marathon with a thirty-pound pack on than sit outside in the snow for more than twenty minutes. I hope to get stationed somewhere warm when this is all set and done.

Your ‘about me’ says you’re going into the Air Defense Artillery after West Point… which is the exact opposite of what I’m doing. Consider myself doubly intrigued Cadet. What do you do? Fire missiles and rockets at jets? That can’t possibly be as much fun as firing them when you’re in the air. It’s cool just not nearly as cool as what I do, know what I mean? Maybe a close second though.

Have you even been in a jet before? I bet you’d like it. I obviously don’t know you, but I haven’t met many people who didn’t like it. There’s something so freeing about flying 1,000 miles per hour in a tiny silver tube. You should try it sometime. If this whole thing works out maybe I’ll even take you up one day, who knows?

I guess that was my attempt at 20 questions. Hopefully you didn’t find it too annoying. Hope to hear back from you soon!

Jake Seresin

November 23rd ,2014

Hello Future Lieutenant Jake Seresin,

I’m thrilled you actually decided to write. I’m glad my name was all you needed to pick up that pen. I have to admit you made me giggle a few times. You seem effortlessly funny Mr. Seresin. Even for a soon-to-be Pilot.

I find it comical you’re asking me about the weather of all things, Midshipmen. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do on an awkward first date? But to answer your question, yes it’s cold as all get out up here. But I’m from Indiana so I’m used to it. Doesn’t mean I didn’t wish West Point wasn’t in Georgia or something. Why’d they have to put all the Military schools in the north?

What was it like growing up in Texas? Did you ever see snow? One of my favorite memories from this place is watching my roommate (who’s from Florida) see and play in snow for the first time. She froze her ass off but had the day of her life. She also hates snow now. So, it looks like you warm people have that in common.

To sum it up I guess you can say we fire rockets and missiles. My professors always say, ‘If it sounds like rocket science, it is’. Basically, we need to protect the ground troops from the flying bastards aka you. Although we do love our American flying bastards. So, I guess that doesn’t knock you down too many pegs in my book. Do you think they matched us up because our jobs are the antithesis of the other? If so, somebody had a hilarious sense of humor.

I’ve never been in a jet, and I have no plans to either. I don’t think I’d enjoy it if we’re being honest. You’re talking to the girl who gets sea-sick on cruises and had to take a motion pill if we’re going to an amusement park. My lil brain can’t handle the motion. A character flaw as they say. I also have a sense that you wouldn’t go to easy on me, being Army and all. I’ll stick to my calculations and rockets.

Don’t tell anybody I wrote this, but I do think what you guys do is so badass. I work with a bunch of jealous Cadets who couldn’t make it into the Army Aviation division, they’re just bitter. When I was little my dad used to take me to the Blue Angels shows in Chicago whenever they made their way across the States. Kind of the reason why I wanted to be in the military in the first place. But only my dad knows that. And well, I guess you now too. So, keep my secret safe Mr. Seresin.

I know the weather is less than desirable, but I do hope you’re finding things you love in Annapolis! There are some of the best crab cakes I’ve ever had there.

Thanks for the smiles after a long week!

Your New Friend,

Y/N Y/L/N

February 16th, 2015

Future Second Lieutenant Y/N Y/L/N,

That has a right to it doesn’t it? Your name sounds good with a Second Lieutenant in front of it. Sorry it’s been so long since I wrote. Getting busy with graduation coming up and practical’s and all. It’s a lame excuse I know, but it’s all I got. I hope you know how big I smiled reading your letter to me. I read it about fifty times before I could write a decent response to you. You have a way with words that I haven’t read in a long, long time.

Was your father in the military? None of my family was. I also loved the Blue Angels when they came down to Houston for the air shows. I’d always beg and plead and finally my mom or sister would give in and take me. They’re also the reason I’m here. So, I guess we should thank them that we got to meet. Neither you nor I would be in these academies without them. Your secret is locked away in the drawer and safe in my head too. It’s super safe with me.

I’ll be honest, the food here is so damn good. I sure do miss my Texas barbeque, but the spread is better up over here. Plus, the snacks? I didn’t know there was different brands sold across the states and you guys have better girl scout cookies! That’s just not fair. I could’ve gone my whole life knowing that there were two versions of girl scout cookies and I got the worse version. I’ve enjoyed the move far more than I’ve regretted it. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. It doesn’t guarantee I’ll be a pilot, but it means I’m one step closer to getting there.

What all schooling do you have to do after you graduate this spring? Are you up for deployment soon? I’ve got a lot left to go. If I get picked after I’ve got a few years of flight school ahead of me. Then I’ll really be off. Wish me luck I make it!

With Love,

Jake

March 13th, 2015

Mr. Seresin,

I was getting worried! I thought it was something I had wrote. I’m glad it’s your negligence and not mine for the lack of communication. I forgive you though. It’s been stressful up here in New York as well. I luckily don’t have any practical’s I need to worry about. Just a few nuclear engineering classes are standing in between me and graduation.

I just have a year of Officer School (if I get selected that is) after this is all set and done come June. We have to apply this April so I’m getting a little anxious about the whole thing. I don’t really have a backup plan that I’d actually like to do so I really, really hope I get selected. Enough about me though, let’s talk about you. You’re going to get picked! Don’t let any bad thoughts get in between you and your goal. I think you’ll make a fine pilot Jake. You seem to have your wits about you which is the first step a lot of people miss.

My dad was in the Navy, like you. Don’t gloat though, it’ll ruin the finely crafted image I have of you. He was a deck hand or something like that. I wish I could ask him some more about it, but he passed when I was just thirteen. I just remember he loved being in the Navy. He loved everything about it. He made it seem like anything was possible with a passion.

I’m glad you’re enjoying the food and the girl scout cookies. It took me by surprise when I got Peanut Butter Patties instead of Tagalongs when I was down south for a winter. I’m so glad I grew up where the real GSC are sold.

I hope this letter brought you as much joy as yours brought me.

With the Same Love,

Y/N

(P.S. – Here’s my number if you’d like to text instead of write. No pressure!)

It had only been a week since you sent the last letter. Sure, you hadn’t really known the guy all too well but there was something so exciting about sending written mail. You felt like a little kid on Christmas waiting for a response from him. Who knew throwing your name in something so silly for your class would bring you so much joy.

You sat down on your desk setting your computer out front of you to study. Jake was right. It was an awfully busy time of the year. Applying for your future. Studying for you exams. When you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket you truly didn’t think much of it. It was only hours later when you finally closed the laptop shut that you went to check it that your face scrunched in confusion. You didn’t recognize the area code. It was then that it clicked that it could be him.

No pressure at all text! Hi there (it’s Jake).

You grinned reading it over and over again. That was quick! Maybe you made an impression? You sure hoped so. You hardly even knew what the guy looked like. You might’ve gone digging a little when you got his name. He was cute. Handsome even. But he seemed like that type. That arrogant pilot type. But even in just the two letters you received from him you got the hint that he wasn’t that type of guy at all.

I didn’t think you’d actually text me. It’s good to hear from you.

The messages between the two of you were infrequent at best as the semester ended. But he never failed to put a smile on your face. When you needed a pick me up you went through and read the messages that popped up.

On your graduation day you sent him a picture of you and a few friends in a cap and gown with the text: Beat you! You’re also looking at your newest Officer Candidate too!

You didn’t have to wait long for a reply. Your face only grew with glee seeing his response: Congrats Second Lieutenant. And future Captain. Knew you’d do it. You look beautiful as always.

Typing a quick reply, you hid your smile away just knowing your friends would make a stupid comment about the mystery man that always had you so smiley: You’re making me blush all the way up here in New York. I better get a picture next weekend when you do the same, future Lieutenant.

He came through on your request. When you got the text you could only smile. You spotted him in the picture immediately, your eyes drawn to him. He was so damned handsome. How lucky were you to get paired with a guy like that? Your smile grew further when you read the message: Lieutenant (and future pilot) Jake Seresin reporting for picture duty.

The messages occurred naturally between through the years as you were deployed, and he was in school. Some months you texted more and some you didn’t hear from him at all. It never bothered you. The silly little thing called life happened for both of you.

Still, the two of you often made time for phone calls when the time was right. The first time you talked on the phone you thought you were going to quite literally throw up you were so nervous. But in typical Jake Seresin fashion he made you feel cool as a cucumber. You talked and talked and talked into the morning. It felt so normal. Like you were catching up with an old friend. Jake Seresin. Who was this man that was making it hard to date? He was quite literally everything you wanted and needed in a partner. The universe had a funny way of working sometimes.

It had been six long years since you received that first letter from him. He was off on a mission now. A dangerous one he couldn’t tell you much about. But he wanted you at his arrival back home in San Diego and you promised him you’d be there. Assured him. That’s how you ended up in here pacing in the hotel room contemplating whether you should really go or not. It felt too intimate, like you were intruding. But he did say none of his family would be there, they had other things going on as the mission was a bit of a surprise to everybody. The pilots were all instructed to keep it as quiet as possible.

Your hands were shaking as you parked your car in the overcrowded lot. Gripping the steering wheel, you took a long breath in. You could do this. You had to do this. For him, for you. You stepped out of the car and made you way to the dock. The aircraft carrier was already docked by the time you got to the meeting site. You stood back and waited. Watched and waited. It felt like an eternity then finally the men and women started pouring out in their Navy Whites. You’d always thought they looked the sharpest of the bunch, but you’d never tell Jake that. He’d make fun of your Army uniforms or something like that.

It felt like both an eternity and seconds later that you spotted him amongst the crowd of sailors exiting the ship searching high and low for you. You promised you’d be there. And here you were. He either felt your eyes on him or had an uncanny sense of timing as his eyes locked with your own. His smile had melted you right there on the spot. You felt helpless as you willed your brain to move but it wouldn’t. You only began to panic a little as he moved with ease through the crowd making his way right to you.

He stood in front of you. Jake Seresin stood in front of you, much taller than you thought, “I knew I recognized you. First Lieutenant Y/L/N.” His eyebrows raised as you gaped at him with wide eyes as if he wasn’t really there. Closing your mouth, you knew you needed to pull it together but that sounded much easier said than done. Jake freaking Seresin, your pen pal was really standing in front of you in real life. He was more of enigma in your mind at this point. Somebody you could have deep life conversations with so easily but never having actually met the man it was hard for you to grasp he was really real. And standing in front of you.

“Jake.” You smiled hoping it sounded somewhat normal. He was so much more handsome than the photos he sent through the years. How was that possible? Wasn’t it supposed to go the other way? You continued once your head finally could form coherent sentences, “Well it’s actually Captain now. Got promoted a couple weeks ago.”

He turned his head to the side just slightly, “You didn’t tell me that.” Almost looking offended you hadn’t told him.

“Never felt like the right time to divulge. With this mission and all. Had to keep you locked in.” You looked up to him now studying his face as you gained more courage talking to him. He was something your dreams couldn’t make up.

He nodded not daring to take his eyes off you. He too thought you were even prettier than he could have envisioned. You’d sent pictures and he’d followed your social media, but nothing could’ve prepared him. Especially in your civilian clothes, he was a sucker already. Deep down Jake knew you were the reason he was so non-committal before. He was looking for somebody just like you and couldn’t find her. Yet here you stood in front of him. You were so funny and witty and smart, and yet he couldn’t put it all into words. You are the whole package and so much more.

“You still could’ve told me. We talked enough before I left.” He grinned seeing that the tension was already easing from your shoulders.

You shook your head, “Wasn’t about me Seresin. I just wanted you to stay focused and safe. And thank goodness you did.” You admitted a little more than you wanted, but he just made you feel so gushy. Like you were a sweeter version of yourself you could hardly recognize. And the words just kept flowing out when he gave you that look with those green eyes.

“Oh yeah?” He challenged you a bit sensing that you were starting to feel a bit more comfortable with him already, “Didn’t think you’d be so relieved darlin’.”

Ignoring the sweet term of endearment you shook your head, “And waste six years of my life on nothing? Jake that’s so inefficient. Of course, I want you safe.” The words came fast, and they were snarkier than you intended. But you truly couldn’t help it.  He had you relaxed within the first five minutes of talking to him. You felt like you could just be you.

He threw his head back in laughter. That same weight had lifted right off his shoulders when you snapped back at him like he was waiting on it, “There she is. My favorite mouthy girl.”

He said it so nonchalantly you thought your heart was going to combust on the spot. Your cheeks surely gave way to your reaction to his words. His favorite mouthy girl? Christ. He was trying to send you into a coma or something! Your brain quite literally short circuited as it failed to form any coherent sentence. He only chuckled in response seeing your cheeks heat up in a blazing blush.

“It’s so nice to actually see you in person. You know I’ve always told you this, but it rings even truer even now. You’re quite a stunner, Captain.” His eyes met yours before you looked away quickly feeling as though you were going to faint at those words. You weren’t sure how this interaction was going to go initially. But you really didn’t think he’d come right out and say that he found you stunning. The occasional letter and texts in between had grown flirtier the longer you had known him, but it never crossed your mind he’d be so outright with it.

You turned away out of sheer bashfulness. Never had a man been so bold with you before. It was foreign. Not uncomfortable, no. Nothing could be with him. He made it easier than seemed possible.

“You flatter me Jake.” You grinned up at him hoping your makeup would hide the darkening of your cheeks, “I should say the same for you. Handsome as ever.”

“Now you’re making me blush, Cap.” Sure as hell the faintest pink dusted his cheek, but he seemed much stronger than you. He kept the eye contact going.

You shook your head trying to bite back the big smile you had on your face, but it showed through anyway. How was he doing this? Making you feel so giddy just by looking at him. You knew this man but for the first time it actually felt like you might actually love him. You’d had the deepest conversations with him. When you needed a laugh you texted him. When you craved advice you called him. He was the guy you turned to. And it dawned on you that he never failed to answer you. He wanted to take your calls and answer your texts. He looked forward to it. He too had fallen for a woman he’d never met before.

You needed the change the subject and fast or more words would be tumbling out, “How was the mission? Everyone make it out okay?” You asked having no idea what you were getting yourself into. Jake hadn’t told you much about what they were doing, couldn’t tell you much. But now that it was over he couldn’t wait to tell you every nitty gritty little detail.

“I’ll tell you if you let me buy you a drink?” He gave you a smirk that sent nerves racing throughout your body. Jesus. This man was something else.

Giving him a curious once over you nodded, “Shouldn’t I be the one buying you a drink sailor? You coming home and all?”

“Absolutely not. I’ll never let you buy me a drink darlin’.”

Gosh, Jake was actually going to be the death of you. He was so good making his words come off so easily. You felt terribly high strung next to him, “And why not?”

“Because I’m trying to woo you sweetheart. When I get you to go on a date with me I have to impress you. Inevitably that’ll work and you’ll become my girlfriend. And I can’t have my girlfriend paying for my drinks, no. And it’ll only get worse when I get the pleasure of marrying you. If my wife thinks she’ll pay for a thing she had another thing coming.” He gleamed at you as if he didn’t just say all of that.

You gulped before a stupid smile grew on your face. Of course, you knew he was forward but again, he just took you on an entirely new adventure with that statement, “That’s quite a bold statement Jake.”

He shrugged, “I thought I should make my intentions perfectly clear. I think you’re one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. And you’re perfectly you. Sharp as tack. Funnier than ever. You’re you. And I really like you.”

You let out a breath not sure if you really believed all of that, “So not just pals, huh?” It was all you could think of quickly but that did it for him. Sealed the deal. He knew he was going to marry you right then and there. You’d complete him in every way he needed you and vice versa.

He shook his head taking his arm in yours, “Not just pals.” Leaning into his gentle embrace you led him to your car where he would not let you drive. He insisted that it was a gentleman’s job even if he was only running off four hours of sleep. You’d appeased the man who was on his very best behavior. Not that you minded. Nope, not at all. You were thrilled that Jake was exactly who he seemed to be. Your Jake. Not just pals indeed.

Jake Seresin/Top Gun: Permanent Taglist (If you'd like to be added to any or all works please fill out the form here: Taglist Sign Up) @loving-and-dreaming @kmc1989 @memeorydotcom @matisse556 @buckylov3r @taygrls @ah-blossom @mamachasesmayhem @hardballoonlove @rosiahills22 @djs8891 @illisea @jessicab1991 @guacam011y @dempy

[derehono]

24.02.2022.

The day that changed my life forever.

24th of February 2022 should have been my usual day. No, not usual. A wonderful day. I should have been checked with a doctor, gave notice to teachers in high school of my absence, and then fly away on vacation, my parents wanted it so much.

On 23rd of February 2022 I felt happy. I had a secure, happy life, preparing to finals, hanging out with my friends, already having an offer from university.

Until 5AM 24.02.2022.

I had not a single class in my school since then.

I haven’t seen my friend group in 2 years.

I didn’t have my finals.

We did not have that vacation.

“Daughter, wake up. This old psychotic man attacked us. We are leaving.”

That was my first photo of the day, trying sarcastically keep myself normal. I remember that actual emptiness, reading my classmates texts about how their windows were shaking because of explosions, the sky was orange. They sent that video.

He called it “a special military operation”.

I collected random clothes, some hobby stuff just to keep my sanity, grabbed my pet, emptied my safety locker. I was scared that russians would intrude into our home and steal all my savings, so I throw away key to that lock. This key became my symbol of war, I have never found it even after return.

When I with my parents and pet got out of flat to car we heard for the very first time air raid siren. We would hear so many more of them, we would learn to differentiate them, but then we were confused.

It was my second photo. People were going away. Foot, cars, bicycles. I remember such a surreal picture. Some moms were carrying their toddlers, one woman was carrying a bucket of water with turtles, other people were carrying cages with parrots, with dogs, with cats, with exotic pets despite air raid siren, temperature, rain. Everyone was so confused and scared.

Few days later the road we were riding was occupied. Bridges destroyed. Factories burnt. Supermarkets demolished. Houses in ruins. Road in holes. On the side of the road burnt cars with “DO NOT TOUCH, POSSIBLY EXPLOSIVE”. That gut wrenching feeling seeing photos of dead bodies and recognising the place.

But back then it was still lively, not a road of death. I remember reading news then. First victims, first shelling. Invasion from East. Invasion from Kharkiv region. Invasion from Crimea. Invasion from Chernihiv. Invasion from Zhytomyr. And we were in Zhytomyr region at that moment. Explosions in Kyiv. The border was destroyed.

I felt nothing. Just emptiness.

This precious girl was keeping my head cool all the road. She was also scared and irritated, but she was so strong, such an amazing girl. I am so proud of her.

We were heading to my grandparents who lived closer to West Ukraine, so we would be safer. The road that takes usually just 4 hours but that time it took 13 hours. 13 hours of driving exhausted and nerved. We saw soldiers, trucks, jets, how barricades were built, signs were removed.

But we made it. We were lucky. Lucky to be alive, to have family alive and mostly close to West, further from russia. Even though, part of my extended family still was under occupation in Chernihiv region, suffering from such close border with belarus.

When we arrived, we were just silent. Then collected mattresses for shelter, asked grandpa to grab some patrol (we knew that they would definitely destroy reservoirs and literally next day the started doing that), and just fell asleep in something that we arrived in, being so scared.

That day I also cut ties with russian friend who I am shamed to admit having. He was proving me that this is just a military operation, no one would be harmed.

Then, arrived spring that I will never forget but at the same time never remember. I remember 10 people in one floor house. I remember the whistle of rocket that woke us up. I remember sirens. I remember news. I remember losing hope. I remember first photos after deoccupation of Kyiv region. I remember how forgotten friend of my dad suddenly called him saying that his city is fully destroyed, his neighbour right on his eyes was exploded attempting to get into the car and evacuate.

I remember my first mental breakdown. How I was crying in the darkness, but quietly so no one would notice.

We were able to return home three months later. But we are just lucky. Someone would never return. Someone is not even alive to see their home again. Someone’s home is forever destroyed.

I was lucky that I have secured my place at foreign university before war, but my whole family is still in Ukraine.

War is not over at all. 20% of Ukraine is occupied. So many displaced civilians, so many deaths. No one could even count, we do not have any access to bodies. Only way to identify is to deoccupy and find mass graves. No other means. Children are suffering from PTSD even in such a young age. Almost in every city, big or small, you would find graveyards covered in Ukrainian flag, grave of the soldier.

Maybe media does not talk that much of us, but it doesn’t mean that everything is alright. Avdiivka is destroyed, right now operation searching for people under debris of the civilian house after attack is undergoing.

And this is happening all the time.

Who was punished for Olenivka? Who was punished for destruction of Kakhovka Dam? Who was punished for all fully destroyed cities? Who was responsible for all that absolutely atrocious videos torturing Ukrainian soldiers?

Please, remember, Ukraine is still on fire. People are still dying. Soldiers cannot even counterattack because they do not have enough ammo, just for protection. Information war is also waging, sharing all that misinformation, Nazi narratives, russian propaganda.

Remember.

Help.

Share.

russia is a terrorist state.

Glory to Ukraine.

Glory to the Heroes.

[lovemly4]

Hi there! Not sure if you're open for request but if you dont, feel free to ignore 😅 my request will be lando x reader, whereby he's dating a very shy reader so its normal for her to want to keep their relationship very private. However, one day, reader told lando that she's ready to watch him race and support him irl and it makes him so so happy and both of them were smiley and giggly while walking on the paddock. Hope that's okay!

I’m here with you - Lando Norris

word count: 841 ; genre: fluff ; pairing: Lando Norris x reader ; warnings: none, just teeth rotting fluff ☆

Note: Hii, of course requests are open!! And this is so cute omfg, i feel like Lando would be super respectful of you boundaries, but his eyes would light up when you tell him that you’re ready to support him in person to his races.

Wednesday, Nov 29th, 2023

My heart jumped at the sound of the front door opening. It had been three days since the Abu Dhabi GP, and during our time apart we tried to contact each other every time we could.

“My darling, i missed you so much” he exclaimed against my shoulder as I hugged him, inhaling his familiar perfume. I felt a little bad at his words, a little thunder striking through my heart.

Despite being in a relationship with him for four months already, I’ve never felt ready enough to make it public; but what was I so afraid of? I didn’t really know, actually.

I feared that people would come at me, telling me that I wasn’t enough, that he deserved someone better, maybe? Yes, most definitely.

Something held me back, despite my wish to make him the happiest man in the world.

“I missed you too Lan, I’m sorry i wasn’t able to be there with you” I apologized, my hand making its way to his cheek.

He smiled comprehensively.

“You don’t need to apologize love, I know. I would never force you into something you don’t feel comfortable doing” He said in a tone a little louder than just a whisper.

I placed a little peck on his lips, and reached out to help him with his luggages.

Friday, Feb 23rd, 2024

I looked at the tallest shelf in our shared walk-in closet, carefully choosing Lando’s shirts.

My face assumed a concentrated look, as the man walked in behind me placing his hand on my waist.

“Sweetheart, we don’t need to put so much effort in choosing my clothes, you know? I’ll probably be wearing my suit most of the time, anyway” he chuckled, stroking my side.

“I know Lan, but it’s the first race of the season! You must look good!” I talked back, reaching for the Quadrant shirt.

I followed him out of the closet, laying his shirt flat beside his joggers.

I studied him silently as he was organizing the space in his bag.

“…Lando, will you be alone in Bahrain?” i asked hesitantly, nervously playing with the hem of my sleeve.

“Oh no, my team will be there, of course. Zack will arrive two days later than me, he mentioned a problem with his son or something. I’ll meet Oscar outside the airport there.”

I stayed hushed, quietly working out my thoughts as he locked the luggage.

“What if… What if i come with you? To Bahrain. To the race.” i tried to ask, timidly hiding my hands in my pockets.

He turned to me all of a sudden, eyes wide open like a deer caught in headlights.

“Did i heard that right? You’re not joking, are you? Are you serious?” he spoke quickly, almost as if he was trying to convince himself of what he had just heard.

I laughed at his reaction as he took my hands in his.

“Are you really sure y/n? I don’t want you to regret this. I won’t complain if you change your mind.” he sat me on the edge of our shared bed, reassuring me with kind words.

“I’ve never been so sure, Lan. I think it’s about time, i want to cheer you in person and show you all my support” i warmly smiled, and he started bouncing like a little boy. He bursted out of the room before i could process something to say.

“Where are you going?” i shouted, keeping an ear out to detect his distant voice.

“To take your bags!”

Saturday, Mar 2nd, 2024, present day.

A light breeze sways my dress, as I hold Lando’s hand through the paddock.

He never stopped chuckling like a baby since we’ve landed, and now he’s introducing me to every soul on the track.

He walks me to the garage, running to his car and patting the big “4” in the front.

“This is her. Isn’t she beautiful? Hopefully she’ll be a good girl on the track.” I laugh at his seriousness and he copies me, placing his arm around my waist.

“Look, this is where you’re going to sit during the race. You can hear me through the headset. Those are all the monitors through which you can see me. If you need something, let the guys know ok?”

I squeeze his hand reassuringly, and his mind seems to stop wandering for a moment. He has always been so good at hiding his thoughts and feelings, but the quick rise and fall of his chest betrays his calmness.

“Lan, breathe. I’m fine, you’re fine. We’re fine. And most importantly, we’re here together.”

One of the engineers calls for Lando and Oscar, but the light in his eyes is peaceful now.

“I love you. Thank you for being here with me”

I kiss him deeply, and watch him run away with his teammate.

The red lights go out.

The race finally begins, and he couldn’t be happier. He feels safe, and he’s so grateful to have by his side someone so brave and caring.

No matter how it goes, the only thing he cares to win is your heart.

[coffeeshades]

credits to the gif maker!

LOVE IS COMPLICATED - PART V

summary: the trials and tribulations of falling in love or two idiots who can't get their shit together.

pairing: pedro pascal x actress/singer!reader.

word count: 2.3k

warnings: 18+ (minors dni). mentions of sex. angst. cussing, age gap, mentions of drugs and alcohol. no use of y/n, if i missed something please let me know!

a/n: hi everyone! i know i owe you guys SO MUCH so here's a short lil chapter to quench your thirst. more on the way i promise!!! btw this isn't proofread so if u spot any mistakes hit me up. happy reading (or not cause the angst won once again besties, sorry in advance) <3

August 23rd, 2019 

Anaheim, California

You thought that having a shot of tequila would take off the edge of anxiety that had you shaking in your seat, but there you were taking another one, and the tingling in your hands still hadn’t ceased. "Want another?" Renata asked, a bottle in hand and a glint of worry in her eyes as she noticed your unsteady movements. You shook your head; you wouldn't risk it with a third. She waited until the hair and makeup team left the room before putting a hand on your shoulder, the cold of her ring pressing into your skin. "You want to talk about it?"

"It's just nerves," you mumbled, toying with your fingers, trying to brush off her concern. But Renata wasn't convinced, her gaze piercing through your facade. "Is it because of—" she said before you cut her off.

"No," you interrupted firmly, not wanting to dive into that topic. Renata nodded, understanding your reluctance. She simply squeezed your shoulder in silent support, knowing damn well what it was about. As she started to lead you out of the room, you continued. "We haven't seen each other in months."

There it is.

"And the last time we talked, he basically told me he didn't want to do anything with me." Renata's eyes softened; her empathy evident. "He didn't say that," she murmured, her grip on your shoulder tightening.

Your eyes met hers, filled with anger and confusion. "He did. He slept with me and then decided that was it." Renata's expression turned grim as she guided you out of the halls and onto the red carpet. She knew there was more to it than what you were letting on, but who was she to pry?

She faced you while gently fixing your hair as you continued. "But I'm with someone else now, and I'm happy, and I just need to get my shit together." Renata nodded. "You deserve to be happy and move on from this," she said softly.

The chatter of everyone on the carpet and the click of cameras surrounded you both, louder than before. "It'll be just a couple of interviews and photos now. After that, you and—" she hesitated.

"It's okay, you can say his name, Ren."

"You and Pedro will be taken into a photo studio for the official portraits," Renata finished. "Let's just make this quick and painless."

"I can assure you this will be everything except quick and painless," you replied with a forced smile, trying to ignore the knot in your stomach. "But I appreciate your attempt to lighten the mood." She mouthed sorry for a moment before leading you both towards the line of press, where the bright lights and flashing cameras awaited. As you stepped into position to talk to the reporters, you reminded yourself to take a deep breath and stay composed, knowing that it would be okay.

•••

It was, in fact, not okay.

The groan that escaped your lips and the rolling of your eyes were unavoidable. You'd managed to stay clear of him for as long as you could—a complete victory by your standards—and now, with only seconds before you escaped, the very man you had tried to evade appeared before you.

Being within meters of him now, all those firsts, lasts, and never agains were as sharp and vivid as they'd ever been, forming a knot of unease in your chest that made breathing difficult. You hadn't spoken yet, both preoccupied with the rush of media attention surrounding you.

Nonetheless, you took quick glances at him whenever you could.

"Time for the portraits," Renata whispered, as you finished talking to a reporter for the LA Times. "Looking forward to seeing the show!" you nodded, trying to keep your smile in place as you followed Renata. It was a small room with bright lights and a white backdrop, but all you could focus on was the man standing across from you, getting his hair touched up by a stylist. Your own team hovered around you, adjusting your outfit and makeup, but your eyes kept drifting back to him.

The photographer introduced herself, and you were instructed to stand in the middle of the backdrop. You looked each other up and down. God, he looked good, you thought. And then you cursed yourself. Your groan at the sight of him was barely audible, but Renata shot you a knowing look.

"You kinda stole my look," he said, raising an eyebrow. The audacity of this man was infurating. How dare he, after what happened, address you so casually, like nothing has changed between you two?

"Hm, no, you kinda stole my look," you retorted, no emotion in your voice. The tension between you was palpable as the photographer began snapping photos, capturing the silent competition between you two. He was wearing a floral shirt that perfectly complemented your own outfit—a corset-like black top with floral details and black dress pants. However, one little detail caught your eye: the shiny gold chain decorating his neck.

Stop, don't go there. It suddenly became necessary to wash away the awful thought that little piece of jewelry was attractive in the slightest and that cold shower and glass of wine you had been looking forward to at home would now have to happen—but instead of a glass, it would be a whole bottle.

"Okay guys, now let's take some shots pretending to laugh together," the photographer suggested, breaking the tension. You both shared a forced smile, trying to outdo each other in the fake laughter department. "And get closer, please," she added, gesturing for you to move in towards each other. As you leaned in, you couldn't help but notice the faint scent of his cologne. "Pedro, put your arm around her waist," the photographer instructed, prompting Pedro to look down on you.

"Can I?" he asked, ever so politely. The question transported you to a room in Chile, where the tips of his fingers were under your shorts and your mouths were enticingly close.

Stop, stop, stop.

"Sure, whatever," you replied, trying to shake off the memories flooding back. Pedro hesitated for a moment before standing behind you and gently placing his arm around your waist—a moment of unexpected intimacy as your hand followed and rested on top of his. The photographer snapped the picture just as you forced another smile, masking the turmoil within.

"Are we done?" Pedro asked, his voice rumbling in your ear. Despite his complaints, he enjoyed doing photoshoots. They catered to his need to show off.

"Yes, we have everything we need. Thanks guys!"

Both of you quickly separated, relieved to put some distance between yourselves. You didn't say another word as you both gathered your things and headed out of the studio, tension lingering in the air, unsure of what would come next and hating every second of the awkwardness that now hung between you.

•••

The D23 Expo was not turning out to be the fun experience you had hoped for. You've been sitting in the panel room with the rest of the cast and crew for about half an hour, actively avoiding eye contact with the source of your anxiety. Dave was talking about what a huge honor it is to continue his Star Wars journey with a live action series, having previously only worked on animated projects. Jon followed suit, expressing his excitement for the opportunity to develop the series on a more cinematic scale.

Everyone was buzzing with enthusiasm, but you.

"Now I'm going to give the floor to the fans for any questions," the moderator announced, turning towards the crowd with a smile. A teenager in the front row was handed a microphone, anticipation rippling through the audience as she prepared to ask her question.

"Hi, my name's Sarah, and I just wanted to say how thrilled I am for this new series. I am a huge fan of Star Wars, and pretty much everyone here," she said, "especially you and Pedro," gesturing towards you and finally asking the question you've successfully avoided answering all night. "I know you've been friends for a long time. Can you share any behind-the-scenes stories from filming, and how was it working together on this project?"

"Oh, they have a lot. These two were menaces on set," Jon interjected, eliciting laughter from the audience. You exchanged a knowing glance with Pedro before sharing a bright smile with the girl. "I think Jon is specifically referring to the time I broke Pedro's nose and ended up in the hospital."

The audience erupted into a mix of laughter and gasps, clearly entertained by the unexpected revelation as you continued to recount the hilarious mishap. "But yeah, overall, it was definitely a fun and memorable experience working together. We had some great times on set, despite the occasional injury," you added with a chuckle.

"Yeah, she's a brilliant scene partner; I wouldn't change a thing about it," Pedro chimed in, nodding in agreement. If you didn't know better, you would think he actually meant it. The girl beamed at the two of you, clearly enjoying the interaction between you and Pedro, oblivious to the fact that you couldn't wait to get out of there and never see him again.

The moderator intervened, clearly interested in picking up more about the dynamics. "Now that it's been brought up, I was one of the few people who got to see the first episode yesterday, and I have to say there's a lot of on-screen chemistry between the two of you. Is it possible that a romantic relationship will develop in future episodes?"

The answer escaped from your lips instantly. "Not that we can confirm or deny anything at this point, but I think that these characters are very different and have a complex relationship that will continue to evolve as the series progresses, and maybe they work better as friends or allies rather than romantically involved." The moderator nodded, satisfied with the somewhat vague response.

Pedro's eyes caught yours, puzzled by the subtle shift in your tone, before adding, "But I wouldn't rule that out completely."

He was so infuriatingly annoying.

•••

You were in the same room; circling each other the entire day, but he still missed you so much that a brief moment of broken eye contact sent a deep ache cutting through his chest.

Pedro watched you exit the panel room, knowing that he needed to find a way to talk to you. He called your name, making you stop in your tracks and turn around, your face unreadable. Pedro hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to approach you, before finally blurting out, "Hey, do you have a sec?"

He saw you reluctantly give your PA a nod, motioning for her to leave the both of you alone.

Pedro felt tension slip through him and iron in his spine, and he looked around swiftly to see if anyone was paying attention to them. He spotted a door leading to an empty room and gestured for you to follow him inside. As you both entered the room, Pedro closed the door behind you.

This conversation is inevitable.

Pedro waited for a moment before speaking. "We're working together, and will continue to do so."

"So?" your voice was cold and guarded.

He took a deep breath before continuing, "I think we should try to find a way to make it work."

"I think it's working well enough as it is," you replied, crossing your arms. Pedro couldn't help but laugh at your stubbornness. "Come on, we both know that's not true. You've avoided me all day. People are asking if things are okay between us."

"Isn't that what you wanted, though?"

Pedro shook his head. "What? I never said that."

"You might as well have," you spat back. "Because the way I see it, you don't want anything to do with me." He wanted to reach out, grab your hand and tell you that's not all what he meant but he stopped.

You are being so careful with each other now. It was breaking Pedro’s heart a little.

"That's not true. It drives me crazy when you won’t talk to me,” he muttered. "I…just didn't want to complicate things back then."

"Well, things got complicated the moment we slept together," you reminded him. "And that's on both of us."

Pedro sighed, feeling the weight of the situation. "I know," he said softly. "I'm sorry… I didn't handle that conversation very well. I was…" he can't bring himself to finish the sentence. "I don't know."

"You have a tendency of hurting my feelings, disappearing, and then coming back asking for forgiveness," your words come out measured and unexpectedly calm. Bordering on cold.

It was such a sharp, perfect little sting that it made heat pool in his stomach. It made him want to cry.

He said your name ever so tenderly, a plea in his voice.

"I don't know what you want from me," you say, a defeated tone lacing your words. "I moved on, and yet, you keep coming back, reopening old wounds. It happens every time. I can't keep doing this dance with you."

"Yeah, you moved on," and before he can stop himself, Pedro blurts out, dripping in sarcasm, "Quite fast."

Pedro still remembers the shiver that ran down his spine when he picked up his phone one morning, only to see you parading around with Daniel on social media. The worst part was that he knew he had no one to blame but himself.

You raise an eyebrow, surprised by his response. He could tell it echoed through the small space and grated on your every last nerve.

"Fuck you."

A snarl forms on his face, and his upper lip slightly curls. His anger rising to match your own. "Is that all you have to say?" Pedro's voice is laced with bitterness as he struggles to keep his emotions in check. Your eyes burning through him, the air suffocating.

"I had to move on," you simply reply. "You should try it as well." you slipped past him, bumping into his shoulder as you made your way out of the room, leaving him there, trying to remember why he had convinced himself that everything was safer this way because you were too important to risk losing, when in reality, he had already lost you.

And Pedro tries not to love you. He really tries.

a/n: don't kill me please, i know. their time will come, i just need them to reaaaally go through it.

Reblog or like if you enjoyed it! thank you for reading :)

[scoonsalicious]

6.1 Bucky

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Summary: Lily McIntyre, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, mentions of sex, nudity, Bucky's lies come back to bite his ass.

Please note: I'll be taking a break from posting starting on Thursday, May 16th to focus on writing, and will resume posting on Thursday, May 23rd.

Word Count: 1.1k

Previously On...: Porn. The last chapter was porn.

A/N: Sorry, besties; not sure what happened. I set this up to post at 445 per usual, and when I came back on, I saw it still hadn't gone up, so I'm doing it manually. I apologize for this screw up!

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Bucky woke the next morning in a tangle of sheets and Major. He had to pee, but he didn’t want to get up. God, he never wanted to get up. If he could stay wrapped up with her like this, for the rest of his life, he thought, he would die happy. The very idea struck him like a brick– he’d given a lot of thought to his own death over the years, but never, not once, did he ever consider the possibility that he might actually die happy until this very moment. 

If she was in his life when he went, he realized, he very well could.

Major shifted in her sleep and snuggled further into Bucky’s chest with a contented sigh, and he felt his heart swell. If he wasn’t careful, at the rate his feelings were going, he was at risk of proposing to her before lunch. 

After about fifteen more minutes of blissfully watching Major sleep in his arms, Bucky couldn’t hold off his bladder any longer. Gently extricating himself from Major’s embrace so as not to disturb her, he pressed a quick kiss to her forehead before heading to the bathroom. 

After he’d finished and washed his hands, he made his way back toward Major’s bed. As he passed by the string of clothes he’d discarded the night before, he heard a buzzing coming from his pants. He reached down and pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the caller ID.

Lily. Again.

Bucky sighed and took himself back to the bathroom, quietly closing the door behind him as he accepted the call.

“Hey, Lil, what’s up?” he asked, sitting down on the edge of Major’s whirlpool tub.

“Hey, Jamie,” she said, and Bucky could immediately tell something was wrong. She sounded… off, distressed. “Listen,” she continued, “I know you and Sam probably had a late night last night, and I hate bothering you…”

“What’s wrong, Lil?” Bucky asked, growing concerned now. 

“Well, I drove out to Langston Park to run the trails,” Lily began, “and I don’t know if I ran over a nail or had a slow leak, or what, but when I got back to the car, my tire was flat. I was kind of hoping you could meet me up here and help me change it?”

Bucky ran a hand over his stubble. “Shit,” he said. “You know I would in a heartbeat, Lil, but–”

“No, yeah,” Lily interrupted him. “It’s fine, don’t worry. I’m sure someone will drive by and I can flag them down for help–”

“Lily Anne McIntyre, you are not going to wave down a stranger and just hope that they’re not a murderer or a rapist,” Bucky said into the phone, a little louder than he intended. “Listen, I’m on my way, but I’m in the city, so it’s going to take me a little while, okay? Just… just stay in your car with the doors locked until I get there.”

“Oh my gosh, thank you so much, Jamie!” Lily’s voice was full of relief. “You’re my hero! I owe you, big time!”

Bucky cracked a smile. “Yeah, yeah,” he said. “Give me about forty-five minutes to get to you, okay? And remember, lock. your. doors.” 

“I promise,” Lily agreed before ending the call. 

Bucky stood up from the edge of the tub and went back into the bedroom and quietly put his clothes back on. Sitting down at the edge of Major’s side of the bed, he leaned down and began pressing kisses to her shoulder and collarbone until she stirred and started to stretch. 

With a lazy moan that sent the blood straight to Bucky’s dick, Major sleepily blinked her eyes open. “Why are you wearing so many clothes?” she asked him, her voice seductively husky with sleep. “Come back to bed.”

Bucky wanted to. Oh god, he really, really wanted to. “I’m so sorry, sugar,” he told her, leaning down to give her a proper kiss. 

“Bucky,” she laughed, pulling back from him, “I just woke up; I’m sure I have horrible morning breath.”

“Like I would ever care.” He cupped her face in his hands and brought his lips to hers, gently running his tongue along her lips so she opened her mouth to him. 

After a long moment, they broke apart, and Bucky rested his forehead against hers. “I don’t want to leave you,” he said softly. “But I’ve got to go.”

Major nuzzled her cheek against his. “So, don’t,” she murmured. “Stay.”

Bucky sighed. “I can’t. Lily’s got a flat tire; she’s waiting on me to come help her change it.” 

Major let out a puff of air through her lips. “Well, give me five minutes to get dressed and I can come with you,” she offered hopefully. 

“I’d love that, doll,” Bucky said, frowning, “but Lily’s still pissed off about the bar and…” he ran a hand behind his neck, suddenly realizing how stupid this was going to sound, “I haven’t told her I’ve been seeing you.”

The change that came over Major was nearly imperceptible, but Bucky clocked it, all the same. Her eyes narrowed, her shoulders tensed and she pulled back from him by a hair.

“So,” Major began slowly, “where did she think you were last night when she called you, then? You said you’d already told her what you were up to. If she didn’t know you were with me, what did she think you were doing?”

“I told her I was having a guys’ night out in the city with Sam,” Bucky admitted, hating himself now for even deeming the lie necessary in the first place.

“I see.” The words were clipped, Major’s voice void of any emotion, and Bucky knew he’d fucked up. Immensely. “Well, you better get going, then, if Lily’s waiting on you.”

“Major.” Bucky put a hand on her arm, but she got up out of the bed, dragging the topsheet with her to wrap around herself and keep her body covered from him, as if now, suddenly, after everything they’d already done together, she no longer wanted him to see her naked. “Can we just–”

“You should go, Bucky,” she said again, not meeting his eye, and Bucky felt like absolute shit. 

“Can I call you later?” he asked, and he heard the note of desperation in his own voice, but Major just shrugged a shoulder. He tried to lean in to her to give her a kiss goodbye, but she stood there, still as a statue, so he simply pressed his lips to her forehead and sighed before showing himself to the door.

He’d fucked up. He’d fucked up, and he’d blown it. She’d probably never want to see him again, and honestly, could he blame her? He’d lied about being with her, like she was some kind of dirty secret. Sam had been right, though Bucky would never admit it to him. Why was he letting Lily’s opinion dictate how he lived his life?

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

[gender-trash]

(i am seriously late in posting about this due to The Problems BUT whatever! its here now!!)

somewhere around late november 2022, i asked my dad "hey are there any out of print technical books you'd like a reprint of for christmas?"

he linked me to a dubious black-and-white pdf of Foundations of Mechanical Accuracy. now, i wound up checking out a copy through link+, and the original edition is a really nicely put together book! the chapters are themed around various types of measurements (length, angle, etc), and they all have these cute little diagrams which the endpapers reuse in a lil repeating pattern... the image captions are done in this really lovely dark red that did not scan for SHIT... tons and tons of diagrams and illustrations and images (both color and b&w)... just, all around, a fucking nice book!! (see also @morrak's post about it here.)

and that made me feel kind of bad about the crappiness of the pdf, which is where the Problems began. i used my phone to take pictures of all the photos and color diagrams in the original and went about replacing them in the pdf, using what turned out to be the world's worst pdf editing software (i also got through replacing all the image captions in chapter 1 of 5 before my dad convinced me to give up). i did NOT finish the pdf editing before christmas 2022 (i was going somewhat off the deep end, because both my housemates were away visiting family and i had zero external structure in my life so it was just me and my cat and this stupid FUCKING pdf wrecking my sleep schedule together); i poked away at it for most of the rest of my time off and then got so goddamn sick of it i put the project away for months. "it'll be a birthday gift instead", i said optimistically (my dad's birthday is in april! it should have been enough time!)

gentle readers, i did not finish the pdf editing by april. mostly because it was such a miserable slog that i put it off until the last possible moment and then tried to make up for it with another death march.

hating both myself and the project again, i decided i was Not going to let myself typeset Anything Else before it was done, and then took a break to bind my immortal (using the renegade publishing typeset! i didn't do any typesetting!!). SURELY, i said, i can finish this in time for christmas 2023.

i'm sure you know where this is going.

in my defense i DID finish the pdf editing by christmas, despite first doing every other possible procrastination project (including a second edition of the little second century warlord book), because by this point my dad had managed to convince me to lower my standards. on the evening of the 22nd i kicked off the print job and said to myself "this will finish printing overnight and then tomorrow i can work on sewing the textblock!"

late on the 23rd, after lots of babysitting and using at least one cartridge of every color ink in my printer, the print job was finally done. (my sweet and lovely cat wants SO BADLY to hunt and stalk the printer while it is printing -- more specifically, the printed pages, i think because they tend to make noise and move and then STOP moving. for this reason, the printer is kept in the craft room, because the cat can be shut out of the craft room and thus prevented from chewing on the pages when i have an all-day book printing job going. unfortunately the craft room was also being pressed into service as a guest room at the time so 80% of the floor space was consumed by an air mattress which i had to repeatedly trip over in order to reach the printer and replace the ink cartridges.)

then i went to my parents' house on the 24th and 25th and apologized to my dad (again) for not having the book finished. but this worked out well because we finished putting together my awesome new book clamp:

(the feet still aren't done being painted so they're just dry-fit on for now but you can still clamp books in it and that's what matters!!)

i came home, sewed the textblock (french link stitch over four linen tapes, with sewn endbands made of variegated embroidery floss over linen cord, and kozo paper glued over the spine)

... and promptly realized i SHOULD HAVE PUT IN MORE OF A GUTTER because some of the text was getting reeeeeeal close to the spine. "it's fine!" i said. "i just have to make sure it lays flat!! what better time than to try out K118 binding, a technique i have literally never done before and which people on the bookbinding discord notoriously have a hard time pulling off first try! i even have tyvek tape for it!"

so it turns out that tyvek tape isn't actually tyvek with glue on it, it's tape FOR attaching pieces of tyvek TO EACH OTHER, which maybe i could have guessed if i'd done even the slightest amount of research or planning. at this point i think it was the 27th and i was still angling to get this thing done by new year's, so no time to order Actual Tyvek.

fortunately, i had ALSO received An Package in the mail with yarn for a totally unrelated knitting project... shipped in a tyvek envelope.

i peeled all the shipping labels and stickers off my tyvek envelope, cut that shit up, and glued it on there.

and THEN it was time for gluing on covers, which i thought was going to be easy because i had actually thought ahead and ordered materials (specifically acid-free museum board), except when i cracked open the box of museum board i decided i Didn't Like It because the surface was too soft and easily dented, so i glued onto it the too-thin board material i'd previously been using (so that the cardboard goes on the outside of the book). this worked super well (the cardboard stuff has a tendency to curl up from the glue moisture, but the museum board doesn't!) and i'll probably use it on other stuff in the future.

i thought the blue bookcloth i used was kind of boring but i showed my dad the available cloth options and he really liked it, so... what do you know? i cut the piece i used on the back cover very slightly too short but it wound up being covered by the leather, so you can barely tell.

and the leather... a scrap just baaaaarely big enough from my bag of leather scraps from discount fabrics... and this the first time i'd ever attempted to put leather on a book... AND YET the only complaint i have is that i didn't manage to put an even amount on the front and back. it's reasonably square and straight!! amazing!!

i am super super happy with how this project came out (especially given the number of problems i encountered) and oh my god check out how much the spine bends

AND, AS A NEW YEAR'S PRESENT, I FINALLY MANAGED TO GIVE IT TO MY DAD

[thebestofoneshots]

Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 7.6 K Warnings: None Prompt: Time to wrap it all up, and perhaps receive one or two surprises. This IS a Wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it. Proofread by lovely: @aremuslupinsimp

Chapter 42: Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

Wednesday, December 23rd

The art store was small, but filled with colours all around. Small little black cabinets with golden numbers on top behind the counter, and walls lined with different paint pots and colours, a wall with wooden frames and delicately separated boxes that held paint brushes of all different sizes and shapes and, by the bits you’d read, also materials. 

At the top of the cabinets there was a small display of colourful markers and pens and other things that you knew muggles used but you weren’t too familiar with. Apparently, they used stick glue instead of sticking spells to adhere stuff. You wondered how much of this stuff Sirius actually knew about and vowed to bring him to this place with you one day. 

And while you did appreciate art, thoroughly – you’d gone to multiple museums, both muggle and wizarding through your trips – you had no idea what the difference was between gouache and acrylic, or why the “Rembrandt” that claimed to be made out of oil, where much more expensive than the “Winsor & Newton” ones that claimed the same. It had to be because of the quality, right? 

“Good evening, may I help you?” a young man, probably in his late twenties asked as he approached you. He was dressed in rather formal clothes and had a pair of thin-rimmed golden glasses. You would have probably considered him attractive if you hadn’t been accustomed to Sirius’ dashing looks or Remus’ lovely smile. You really were lucky to be surrounded by handsome and pretty humans, you thought, thinking of the rest of your friends. 

You must have looked as lost as a Bowtruckle in the middle of New York since he looked like he would try to be overly polite. 

“I’m looking for a gift, my boyfriend loves to draw, but I’m… not really good with all the supplies and stuff, I was thinking perhaps a nice set of pencils and a sketchbook. I’ve been looking through the paints as well, but I don’t think he’s the kind to do the whole canvas thing, at least not while we’re in school.” 

“Well, does he colour his drawings?” 

You thought about it for a moment, what he’d shown you were mostly sketches done in pencil, though there were some with an underlayer of red and or blue. “I think he uses some for the base of the drawings.” 

“Does he overline them?” The expression you gave him when he asked made him clarify it. “After the pencil sketch is done, does he add a pen or marker to finish up the details?” 

Sirius did not do that, but you also thought how complicated it would be to do such a thing with a quill instead of the pens and trinkets the muggles had invented so you nodded in response. “Yeah… not that often but I’m sure he’d like something to be able to do it.” 

“All right, follow me,” he said as he motioned to one of the furthest walls. “This is where we keep all of our sketchbooks, the thicker the grammage the stronger pens and markers it will hold. Also, some can even hold watercolour, not sure if he’s into that too.” 

“Do you have like – a book on the basics of watercoloring? I feel like he might actually be interested in that.” 

“We do,” he said with a nod and moved to the other side of the store bringing you a few options. You picked one of them and then looked through the sketchbooks. There were different sizes and colours and the pages felt really different on most of them. Some were especially made for watercolours and some were for drawing. You took one with about 100 pages for watercolour and one with the same amount of pages but with a bit less grammage for sketches. 

They both had a black cover with golden elegant trims that you thought would definitely go with Sirius’ look, although one opened from the side, making it more of a panoramic view while the other one stayed horizontal. You handed them in to the guy and he took them to the counter as you continued looking around. You leaned into the watercolour section and started to look at all the different options available. 

“If this is the first time he’ll do watercolour, may I recommend you buy a set?” he asked politely as he showed you a small wooden case, when he opened it there were all sorts of small blocks with different colours on them. “These are my favourite brand, but really gentle with beginners, they also come with this interesting thing,” he added as he handed you a small brush with a clear section at the top. “It comes with water, you don’t have to dip your brush that often, really useful once you get the hang of it.” 

“You have more of those?” you asked and he nodded, showing you the different sizes of brush ends. After a while, and with a lot of his help, you ended up selecting about 5 different brushes and the colours that you’d fill the small wooden box with as well, which you thought was fantastic since you could fill it up with whatever colours you chose and not a set palette. 

“You’ll also take the marker set, the watercolour book and the sketchbooks, correct? Anything else?” 

“Uhh… Am I missing anything that he might need?

“Does he draw portraits or landscapes?” 

You thought back of the Remus drawing he’d shown you, and then of the one you had chosen not to see. “He draws portraits and anatomy studies. Though I’m sure I’ve seen him doodle other stuff too.” 

“He might like this book then,” he told you as he handed over another book. It was about proportions and hand drawing and a lot of very advanced-looking stuff, you smiled. 

“This one as well, please…” he was about to finish the bill when you stopped him, looking down through the glass display and pointing towards something, “Is that a penknife?” 

“Well, yes,” he replied, “Although sharpeners are used more often nowadays, some people still prefer them.” 

“I’d like one of those as well,” you added with a smile. 

“Excellent.” The man gave you your total and then handed every single thing in a thick paper bag. “You said it was for a gift, right?” 

“Yes,” you nodded and he walked to the back of the shop, pulling a very elegant and sturdy black box, he eyed the bag as if calculating if everything would fit and then handed it over to you along with a black and gold ribbon with the name of the store repeated over and over. 

As he handed it over he pulled it back for a second and gave you a smile. “That young gentleman is very lucky to have you as a girlfriend.” 

“I think I’m just as lucky as he is,” you responded with a small smirk as you took the box. 

“Would you like me to call you a cab?” 

You thought about it for a second. Your house wasn’t that far, and with a short levitating spell you wouldn’t have to carry much stuff either, but the Knight Bus did mention they’d be very busy and you had been walking all day. “Yes, thank you.”

The man called for one and you waited inside the store until the cabbie arrived. You gave him your address and he took you straight there. You took the lift of your building, using your wand to unlock the secret –magical- floor your parents had purchased in London and waited. 

When the two, golden doors of the lift opened to your drawing room, you sighed. Leaning down to take off your shoes. “Mom? Dad?” 

No answer. “What time is it?” you whispered to yourself as you looked at the clock, quarter past ten? That art store surely has late closing times, you thought as you leaned back down to pull your bags up and drag them to your room. 

There was a note on the table along with what looked like a delightfully looking salad and steak. 

We’ll be home late, serve yourself. See you tomorrow darling.

You sighed and after placing the bags on the table, and using a warming spell on the food, you ate. Once you were done, the plate disappeared from the table and instead, a chocolate cake showed up. You smiled, at least they knew you liked sweets. You took a few bites from that and took it, along with your gifts, to your room. 

That’s when you remembered you had promised to tell your friends when you arrived here so you quickly scribbled a few notes. Sending your owl –Resse– back to the Potter’s and Barnaby –the family’s owl– to Beth. Then you took some Floo powder and leaned over the fire. 

“Tom?” You asked as you peeked through his chimney. 

“Sly sprite?” He asked as he leaned over. “I was starting to worry,” he said as he left a book on the side. “You got home, all right?” 

“Yeah!” you said with a smile. “And I got a bunch of good stuff at the store too, it was worth it.” 

“It better have been! Beth is home too, we stopped by hers first.” 

You chatted with Tom for a little while more and ended the call when you started to yawn and he followed right after. With that, you went for a quick and warm shower and then back to bed. 

Thursday, December 24th

There was a soft knock on the door, you stirred on your bed but didn’t wake and then there was another one. “Sweetheart? Breakfast’s ready, come eat.” 

“On my way,” you said as you sat on your bed and rubbed your eyes a couple of times. The day was bright, you’d forgotten to shut your windows at night and now you had the perfect view of the Thames through your window. You thought back to Hogwarts and how all the splendour of it had been made by magic, while the splendour of London had mostly been made by muggles. 

The high skyscrapers, the Ferris Wheel across the river, the towers, palaces and bridges, all muggle-made, and without magic, it was fascinating. You didn’t understand why wizards had so many prejudices against them –aside from the whole burning on steak part, muggles seemed to be quite incredible and determined people.  Perhaps you should have taken that muggle studies optative. 

“Sweetheart?” you heard your father’s voice, a bit more stern than your mother’s. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming!” you said as you shook your covers off and grabbed your wand from the nightstand. “As if they hadn’t been home hours after I got here,” you mumbled as you fished for a pair of slippers under your bed. 

By the time you got out of your room both your mom and dad were sitting on the living room table. Your mom was wearing a beautiful cocktail dress while your dad had a perfectly fitting black suit on with a small cape, draped elegantly behind his chair. You were still wearing a band shirt you had stolen from Sirius a while ago, and that you had been wearing under Remus’ jumper before the trip. “Lovely to see you,” you said with an awkward smile, “it’s been a while.” 

Your father looked up from his newspaper with a cup of coffee in his hand only for a second, nodded and then went back to read. Your mom gave you a sympathetic look and nodded for you to sit down. After a couple of minutes, your dad bent the newspaper and placed it on the side of the table.  

“We’ve heard plenty of your Hogwarts Adventures,” your father said looking at you. “You’ve been doing a masterful job at maintaining our house’s name relevant.”  

You frowned at that, that had never been your intention. 

“You were incredible in the broom race though you lost,” your father said. “And you’ve won two quidditch matches–” 

“That was a team effort…” you said, your voice growing smaller as his hand dismissed you. 

“You’ve kept your grades high and you’ve even entered the duelling club…”

“Not to mention her Theoretical Magic grades,” your mom added with a smile. 

“And you’re dating one of the Black kids.” 

You swallowed. You had mentioned in your letters that you and Sirius had gotten along now that you were in the same house, but you hadn’t specifically mentioned you were dating him.

“The disowned Black kid,” your father continued. 

You straightened a little, you had discussed with your dad the things that happened back in your vacations with the Blacks. It hadn’t been particularly nice talk, but you weren’t going to back down, his political means could not be worth more than his morals. And things had been rather tense between the two since then.

When two people had such intense ideological differences and desires, they were bound to clash against each other, especially when those ideologies juxtaposed against the other often, being only furthered by the fact that you were –at least on breaks– living under the same roof. 

Your priorities had been wildly different and you weren’t shy about letting him know, which caused your relationship to deteriorate quickly. Not to say you –or him– had been particularly rude to each other, but you were much colder. It was almost Christmas, and you didn’t want to start a fight with him, let alone over something that you were most definitely not going to yield on. 

“I think it’s all right. He might have been disowned by his family but he still stays in contact with some of the other Blacks like Alphard and the other disowned child… whatever her name is…” Andromeda, you thought as you tried to process the fact that he had just said it was fine. “Just try to avoid mentioning him in tomorrow’s dinner. I’m sure Walburga wouldn’t be particularly pleased.” 

“Tomorrow’s dinn– Walburga will be coming?” 

“Of course not, they have invited us to their Christmas dinner,” he said. “It’ll be hosted in Rosier Manor, I believe.” 

“Whose manor?” You asked, your breath going short along with your question. 

“Mr. Rosier,” your mom repeated. “All important wizards will be there.” 

“I’d rather skip Christmas altogether.” 

“I’m sorry, darling. This isn’t a matter of preferences. You will go and then we’ll let you do whatever you please for the rest of the break. Visit muggle London as much as you want or dally with your friends, I really don’t care as long as you maintain your composure during tomorrow’s dinner.”

Your leg was bouncing slightly under the table. “I don’t believe I will be welcomed in that house.” 

“You will be welcomed because you are my daughter and I’m me,” he said with an air of finality. “We need to present a strong family front, play your part and you’ll be rewarded.” 

“Right, my part,” you said bitterly. You wondered if your mother was playing her part too, they were in love, that wasn’t questionable, but sometimes it felt like she became nothing more than an addition to his recollection of what a perfect life should look like. Did he marry her because of the love he felt for her or because she’d look like a delightful trophy wife by his side on political dinners? Had she not been as beautiful as she was, had she not been well educated, would he have married her either way? 

You wondered, when had Silas become the man he is now? When did his greed for power become so intense he would sacrifice his morals to achieve it? When you were smaller, you thought they loved each other, even now, you saw when they looked at each other with those adoring eyes, but… there was a tale of sacrifice weaved in between their story, and with one party constantly bending to the other’s wishes, you weren’t sure you could still call it love. 

When devotion became toxic, was it still something that came from love, or had it become something else altogether? 

“Indeed darling, we ask for nothing more than one night. Then you will not be bothered, free to go wherever you want and with whomever you please. Does that sound like a fair deal?” 

You sighed and nodded, “One dinner.”

Your mother smiled at that, letting out a nervous breath and then reached for your hand. “Your clothes for tomorrow are already in your closet, I also got you some nice potions and make-up.” 

“Thanks, Mum,” you said with a short smile and looked at your food. It looked delicious, it was French toast with berries and fruit on top –probably there to appeal to your sweet tooth and convince you to go– but you didn’t feel hungry at all. Especially not at the thought of having to go to Rosier Manor. As if you didn’t see enough of Evan at school, now you had to go see him on the break as well, bIoody brilliant. “Breakfast was great,” you said as you stood up. Both of them decided to ignore your almost intact plate, “I’ll be in my room in case you need anything else, you know like me playing the role of the perfect child of the politician if your friends come around or whatever.”

Your mom gave you a reproachful look while your dad gave you an impassive one, you raised your eyebrows at the two of them, almost tauntingly before you turned around, walking back to your room and letting the door close behind you gently –it was not the inanimate objects fault that your parents were acting like pricks. 

You sat on your bed and took a deep breath before you saw a small owl by one of your windows, you let him in and took the rolled parchment from his feet before feeding him some water. 

Dear Vix, Hope this letter finds you all right, Sirius was moaning about you going along Beth and Tom and not inviting him to buy Christmas stuff it was draining! Now I was not going to write to you about it because he said he would punch me in the face but I had to write anyway since mum and dad wanted you to have our address so you could come here through floo anytime.  Hope you’re having a great time, Sirius and I went flying with Pete today (he lives a few houses from us, did we tell you?), and while it was nice not having to worry about Sirius distracting himself from snogging you, we missed you still.  Mum and Dad send greetings to your parents, hope you’re also having a blast.  Your bestest friend, James P.  PS. Mum sent this tea for you, she said she thinks you’d like it with how much sweet stuff you eat and stuff.  PS 2. Love you, but I bet you’re missing me more <– That was Sirius. 

James’ stupid letter made you chuckle, especially the last bit, as if it had been necessary to point out that Sirius had been the one to write it. You placed the letter into a small box in your bag and smiled as you walked to pick up some of the stuff you’d be giving your friends as their gifts.  

You picked up some wrapping paper and started wrapping all of their gifts, the owls would have to do a couple of trips to take them all to their place, but you’d make sure to leave them plenty of food throughout the night, so they could continue their trips and the presents would be at your friend’s beds in the morning. 

You had gone through most of the smaller gifts first, writing small, and neatly written Christmas cards on them. Then you went for the bigger ones, the books you’d gotten for Lily, some of the stuff for Mary and Marlene, James’ pack, and of course, Remus and Sirius’. 

It wasn’t until then, that you realised how overboard you had gone with your gifts. You’d gotten Remus so many books, both magical and muggle, that you almost felt guilty you hadn’t gotten Lily and James more stuff. And then you tried telling yourself it was because Remus would spend Christmas alone and he deserved at least a bit of happiness, you weren’t deliberately playing favourites. 

And then Sirius’ pile was clearly a mess, you had all the music you’d gotten, the shirts, the penknife that you wanted to engrave with his name (you were researching for the right spell to do it) and a bunch of other stuff for him. Besides, you still wanted to make the playlists, so before you finished packing the bigger boxes, you started testing the recorder. Now there wasn’t exactly a step by step guide on how to record music, but there was a small booklet that showed you how the thing worked and you spend the rest of the day figuring it out, listening to music and making a playlist for each of your friends. Using all the songs you thought they might like.

When you were done with that, you continued packing all the stuff. Deciding to send all the music back to the boys’ room at Hogwarts so they could leave it on Sirius’ stash. Well, all of them except for the David Bowie tape you had specifically gotten for Sirius and that would look great with his shirt and the rest of the gifts you’d gotten him. 

You went out to get some food at some point during the day, and there was another note from your parents telling you they were off at an event. Well, good riddance, you thought as you went back to your room with a sandwich in your hands. You picked one of the books you’d gotten for yourself and you spent almost the rest of the day reading it while jamming to one of the playlists you’d made. A copy of the one you’d made for Remus since you thought it went well with the book you’d chosen to read. 

You fell asleep before your parents got home, with the book still in your hands and the music playing softly in the background until the cassette ran out of tape and was softly ejected by the machine. The sound it made had been so soft it didn’t wake you at all. 

Thankfully, you had remembered to leave enough water and food for the owls, since they had spent all night doing trips back and forth to your house and your friends’. 

Friday, December 25th

You woke up by being pecked in the face by a very big and very angry owl. 

“Oi!” you complained. “What’s wrong with you?” The owl chirped and picked you again, this time on the ear. “Bitch,” you mumbled as you pushed him back lightly, only for him to pick you in the finger again. 

You gave him an upset look and he pulled back just a little, tilting his head towards the window, and the lack of food and refreshments. 

“Oh, so that’s why you’ve been attacking me non-stop?” you asked as you stood up from the bed, failing to see the pile of wrapped gifts at the end of it. The owl chirped in response, a scowl that you weren’t sure was his natural face shape or an actual scowl directed towards you. “I’m sorry,” you added, “Barnaby and Reese must have eaten them all. They did many trips last night, you know?” 

The owl chirped again, a little angry as he flew towards the window, as if saying «I too flew many trips last night» looking as indignant as a Towny Owl could. You added a few of the special snacks you kept for Reese just to keep him from biting you again. You looked at the name tag and realised who the owner of the owl had been. 

Eun-ji, Minho had told you about her, she was his family’s owl and apparently, the name meant something like “kind”. So much for a kind owl, you thought as you looked at her, gobbling up Reese’s treats. You leaned over when you noticed there was a small letter attached to his feet and took it in your hands before the owl flapped his wings and left. 

Merry Christmas Star Seeker,  Hope you’re having a great time. Thought of giving you a special thanks for that one time you –quite literally– pushed me towards my crush and got us to start a conversation, that, well, you know how great it ended!  Even for a Gryffindor, you’re really nice, so I thought of getting you something for you to get some more hate from your fellow Gryffindor, Eun-ji must have left the gift near your bed.

You turned to the side in the middle of reading and stood agape, there was not only a green and silver wrapped gift in what looked suspiciously like the shape of a snake, but there were also a bunch of other gifts wrapped in all sorts of colours. 

Anyway thanks for everything, hope you have fun and all. I’m looking forward to beating you all next time we play,   Love,  The one and only, and your favourite Slytherin, Minho Cha. 

You rolled your eyes at the last bit, it had been very Slytherin of him, but since you knew Minho, you also knew he was playing it off as a joke on his own house, which made a joke inside a joke and you thought it was actually kind of funny. 

You took a deep breath and walked over to your bed. There were all sorts of gifts prompted there and you decided to unwrap Minho’s first. There was a small, green snake plushie with a bow on it that had a small pendant with something written on it:  “From the snakes that love you dearly,” and then it had the names of all of your Slytherin friends: Minho, Comet, Nox, Reggie, and even some you weren’t expecting like Dorcas and Solacis. You thought it was an adorable little thing, even if –and you were certain of this– your friends would absolutely hate it. Well, not Lily, she’d also think it was adorable. 

And thinking of her, was that you picked the next gift, wrapped in pink and yellow paper, and with her a small dedicatory on the corner, you instantly knew it was from her, her neat and perfect handwriting being the dеad giveaway. You smile as you read her small dedication. She wished you a very, merry Christmas and promised to tell you everything about the train with James as soon as you saw each other in person. She wrote something along the lines of not being able to put it on paper, which made you laugh. 

When you opened the present you were thrilled, it was a small leather notebook, dark red with golden trims and your name on the cover. Not Vixen, not Starshine, or any of the other nicknames that you had come to own and love since you arrived at Hogwarts, but your name. You smiled as you traced your fingers over the letters. There was a pen on the side, golden and apparently of some interesting muggle technology that wasn’t that popular in the wizarding world. You thought it was fascinating. When you opened the notebook you realised there was something written, again in her handwriting. 

You’ve had more adventures this year than I’ve had in my lifetime. I think it’s time for you to start writing down some of them, in case you ever want to revisit them. If journaling is not your thing (which I feel like it would be because I know you), you can just use this notebook however you want. You know grocery lists, songs for mixtapes, your favourite lyrics, poems, quotes, Sirius’ doodles, your doodles,  dried flowers, stickers, whatever you want, it’s your space, and you may use it as you wish! Love, Lily

You thought the idea of having your own journal was brilliant, you always admired her for keeping hers so incredibly neat looking, and perhaps being able to let some of your feelings go on a blank page would be better than keeping them bottled up. You doubted you would be nearly as consistent as her, but you decided to add your first couple of words in there, detailing the gifts you’d gotten and the few you still had yet to open. 

You’d gotten a box of your favourite candies from Mary and some incredible quidditch trading cards from Marlene, but she had also added some makeup to her gift because if not you and James would have gotten the exact same thing and you were her favourite between the two. You got a spellbook and a muggle prank book from Tom “to further your career” according to him. There was a large, embossed book from Nina, which you discovered was an annotated version of one of your favourite books and a small set of runes from Sybil. You had gotten her a deck of cards and a book about premonitions. 

There were candies from Nox and a muggle book lantern from Neil Perry, you had both complained at some point about reading with your wand and you thought the solution he’d found was adorable. Peter had gotten you a book about canines, packed along with a small fox-themed bookmarker and a note that said “Thank you for not busting my make-out session and Merry Christmas.” He also added, “PS. maybe with this one you’ll be able to tame Pads.” Which had you wheezing with laughter for a while. 

It took at least a minute to go for the next gift, it was a small box that said to be handled carefully. You opened it according to the instructions. “Shut the fuck up!” you said the moment you realized what was inside. A small Felix Felicis vial. “Shut up, shut up, shut up,” you repeated over and over again. “How did he even get his hands on it?” 

You picked up the paper from behind it, there was a small note. 

Okay say it: aside from Sirius, I AM your favourite Marauder.  You might be wondering, “How the hell did James get his hands on this?”. Well dear, I must say, I have contacts.  AKA my parents are expert potioneers and I somehow convinced Mum to brew one and that’s how I got my hands on it.  Now, I could have given it to any of my friends but I get the feeling you might be needing some of this soon enough. You know, from things I’ve seen and such (please don’t waste it on a quidditch match, though). Anyway, I know you’ll use it well, hope you have a very Merry Christmas!  Your favourite marauder AND bestest friend,  Prongs. 

You chuckled when you finished reading and went back to look at the vial with incredulity. Brewing one of these potions was arduous work, and it took weeks, which meant James must have had convinced Effie to do it even before she’d met you. Never underestimate James Potter, you thought as you grabbed onto the vial and placed it around your neck with a chain, casting a disillusionment charm on it so it wouldn’t be so obvious you had it with you. You thought the gift was brilliant. 

After that, there were only 2 gifts left. You picked the one with a silver bow first. It was a square box, about 12” wide, and had been wrapped in the same paper as James’, which made you guess who it might be from. There were chocolates and a small letter on top, neatly closed and with your name written on the back with Sirius’ almost perfect calligraphy. There was also a paper covering something, but you picked the letter up first. 

You know, I tried writing a love letter, but James wouldn’t stop making ridiculous comments about it not being profound enough and I feared I’d end up writing something close to the painfully ridiculous letters he used to write to Lily so I had to stop myself.  Who would have thought it would be that hard to put thoughts into words? I suppose if I were like Remus it would come out much easier but, unfortunately, you’re stuck with me. Actually no, fortunately you’re stuck with me, I’m delightful.

You laughed, he’s not wrong. 

Anyway, I suppose what I wanted to express in those dreadful attempts of being a poet was that I’m incredibly thankful that you came to Hogwarts and that you came back to me. I’m grateful that you tolerate me and my moods and that you love me for who I am, flaws and all. I wasn’t sure I’d ever found that kind of love, one that I even doubted it existed, and yet you’re always there to tease and make me laugh and– I already sound like James, but you know what I mean. You always know what I mean.  As you see, I am far from a poet, but there is something I like to do and I thought that perhaps, you’d enjoy it more than this terrible love letter.  You know, you and Remus were the first to ever see a sketch from my book, and I was feeling all sorts of things after I offered, and yet, you were there, reassuring me and telling me I didn’t have to do it if I didn’t want to. You know Walburga, it wasn’t much of a choice for me, so it truly meant the world, and fed me the courage I needed to let you see that part of me. And when you two finally saw it and praised me for my skills, for what I did with my own hands… You make me so incredibly gleeful, it’s almost scary how much power you could hold over me. But frankly, I’ll let you hold it all you want.  All right, enough of the sappy stuff, Merry Christmas Starshine, you know you shine brighter than my own star. Hope you like your gift.  Love,  Sirius 

See the letter here

You read the letter a few more times, smiling at the little details and jokes Sirius had sprinkled all over. And then you pulled on the bit of tissue paper covering the very last thing in the box and when you finally saw its content you couldn’t help but swear again, “Son of a bitch!” you whispered. 

There were still some small pieces of paper over the small portrait, and you carefully brushed them out to be able to lift it from the box. The image was a hand-drawn portrait of you. You had a big smile and were looking at what would be the camera if it were an image. It looked like it might have been from one of the pictures from Marlene’s party although Sirius had changed the outfit, you were wearing an oversized sweater and his leather jacket. You could tell it was his because it had one of the enamel pins you had gotten him as a gift on the lapel. 

There were touches of colours in the strokes, not quite painting the drawing but rather giving it relatively bright edges that made it look special, unlike any other doodle. And of course, he had framed it, it was a simple yet elegant frame, dark oak and with small carved details on the sides. On the left bottom corner of the drawing, there was something written in French: 

À l'étoile la plus brillante.  Amour, 

And then, instead of his name, he signed with a small and elegant star doodle. You smiled again, it was one of the loveliest things you’d ever gotten, even if it was a portrait of yourself, the fact that Sirius had been the one to draw it, made it the most special of things. There were portraits upon portraits of you in your house, with magic that allowed you to move and smile, and even talk sometimes, but none of them held as much value as the frozen drawing Sirius had given you. 

Eventually, you placed it on your night table and picked up the last gift still sitting in your bed. His box was smaller than Sirius’, about the size of a book, which had you assumed he had gotten you something along the lines of that. 

You opened the book and found a small, pocket-sized book. It was a Sreath Bàrdachd, according to the golden script at the top. You hadn’t quite realised as you pulled it from the box, but it was handmade. You looked at it in shock as you flipped to the 50+ pages, all in carefully and methodically written cursive, his handwriting. 

Later you realised it was something between a book of poems and a compilation of quotes from different books. You admired the booklet for a few more minutes when you spotted that there was a small letter, still waiting for you inside the box. You pulled it off and broke the seal with a small sword letter opener Nox had given you as a gift. 

As you did, a small chain fell from the letter and you picked it up. It was small and dainty, just long enough to wrap around your wrist, which made you wonder how he’d guessed the size. The chain was simple, and it broke off into two different sections, one with a small crescent moon and then another one with a small star. It also had one small gemstone in between the bigger charms. You looked at it with a smile and held it in your hand as you read the letter. 

Hey there, Little Witch,  Hope you’re having an incredible Christmas. By the time you read this, you’ve probably seen the Sreath Bàrdachd, and knowing how clever you are, you probably already know what that could mean. Yes, It’s a book of poems, but also a bit more than that.  I knew Sirius was making you that incredible gift of his, and I didn’t want to fall behind. Prongs didn’t tell us what he got you but he seemed pretty confident he’d have the best gift of all. Did he?  Never mind, don’t tell me, it’s a silly competition. Either way, I thought you might like having one of these. Mum used to have one, which is why I know they exist. She told me a good friend gave it to her and she has kept it ever since then. I remembered borrowing it from her once when I was little, and she taught me how to carefully flip through the pages as she read to me. She also mentioned it was a silly girl’s thing but I thought it was amazing, and went on to make my own.  Although wonky and, with quotes from children’s books, she thought I was quite a mastermind for making it by myself. Of course, I put a lot more effort into the one you have with you now. Or perhaps the same effort but with better skills. If you’ve flipped through the pages, which I assume you have, since you’re incredibly curious, you’ve probably seen some familiar quotes.  There’s stuff from books we’ve both read and stuff that only I have read but that I thought you might like. Some of my favourite poems too, and some quotes from movies that only you’d be able to get. There are even lyrics from songs, some that we really like, some that Sirius has heard so many times that I already knew them by memory, and since the two of you like similar music, I assumed you’d know them too.  Also, there’s a small bracelet in the letter. I’ve cross-charmed it, in case you ever lose the Sreath Bàrdachd (I truly hope you never do), the gemstone will shine as you approach it. I’ve also added a few luck charms that, while they won’t keep you away from trouble –I don’t think anything could– they may give you some luck while navigating it.  Don’t hit me for saying that, you know it’s true.  Love,  Moony.  PS. Prongs told me about your little quarrel with Sirius on the platform, Sirius definitely misses you more.

See the letter here

By the time you finished Remus’ letter, you were smiling as brightly as you had when you read Sirius’. You were so lucky you had found such incredible people in Hogwarts. Your bedsheets filled with torn wrapping paper were a testament to that. You spend the rest of the afternoon listening to some more music and reading through the book Remus had made. 

He had been especially careful with his handwriting which you thought was adorable, and there were a lot of quotes from Oscar Wilde’s Picture of Dorian Grey. He had written in pencil –so you could erase it if you wanted, not that you would– that it was your fault he was obsessed with his writing now. Taking poems and quotations from both, the book aforementioned and The Ghost of Canterville. You hadn’t read the latter yet, but you were almost counting the days to go back to school and ask him to lend you his copy. 

Unfortunately, all good things come to an end, and you had to leave the warm comfort of reading and listening to music in favour of changing into the clothes your mom had chosen for you. You sighed as the alarm clock you’d set earlier went off, and then went straight towards your closet. The dress she had picked was simple, yet elegant. It wasn’t a long dress like the one she’d probably wear, but a more youthful one with clever intricate details on the sleeves and a midi skirt.  

“Thank god it has sleeves,” you whispered to yourself as you pulled the edge of the sleeve of Sirius’ shirt up. While your skin looked almost smooth, the lighter (almost silvery) shapes where the new skin was growing over the gush Moony had made were pretty evident. You supposed makeup and a spell could make them less visible, at least for a while, but that would have probably taken you a lot more time to achieve. 

You plopped the black dress on, smoothing the sides as walking towards your vanity where your mum had left all the potions and make-up. You sighed, remembering how much more fun it had been to dress for the Gryffindor parties than it was to dress for this one. With the black dress and the pearls on your neck, you felt a lot more like you were about to walk into a funeral rather than a party. My own funeral, you thought with a laugh when you remembered whose house you’d actually be going to. 

You grabbed a pair of red, not-too-high heels, put them on, and took another look in the large mirror by the window. You looked lovely, at least there would be no complaints from your parents on that aspect. What they might complain about was the fact that you took a bag with an undetectable extension charm and filled it with a few of the books you’d gotten as a Christmas gift. You also took the journal Lily had given you and Remus’ Sreath Bàrdachd. And you weren’t sure who’d be attending that party but you sure hoped you’d be able to sneak into a corner and read a book rather than having to interact with some of the most disagreeable friends of your parents. 

“Sweetheart, are you ready?” your mom asked from the kitchen. 

“Yeah, coming,” you said as you grabbed a few more trinkets and dumped them in your bag, just in case. 

You were about to leave the room when you saw a small glistening thing in your bed and you went straight to grab it. It was the bracelet Remus had given you, and even if it took you a while to put it on, and you continued looking between your wrist and the door as you tried to get the clasp to do its job, you thought it was worth it. I could really use that extra luck. You thought. You accommodated the necklace Sirius had given you and that you never took off and then took off James’ potion and placed it on your bag since it might be safer there than around your neck. 

One last look in the mirror to make sure everything was in order and you walked out towards the living room. 

“You look delightful, darling,” your father said as he spotted you walking out of the room. 

You gave him a half shrug in response and then managed to mutter a “thanks” that you hoped didn’t sound as bitter as it felt. After another moment of silence, your mom grabbed her bag and finished clipping on one of her earrings. 

“We’ll take the floo?” you asked. 

Your father shook his head, “They’ve sent over a Portkey,” your mom explained and motioned to the table, there was a small, fancy-looking invitation right in the middle. 

“Nice,” you said as you used your wand to levitate the object and move it right in between your parents. Perhaps if it had been floo, you could have sneakily said James’ address instead of Evan’s and escaped the party altogether. Once there, your parents wouldn’t make a fuss about it in order to not make your insubordination evident. But of course, you weren’t that lucky, and you’d have to take the portkey and you’d have to go to the party. 

“In three,” your father said as he moved his hand towards the invitation, “two… one… go.” 

The three of you placed your hands on the invitation at the same time and you felt the very familiar pull on your lower back, in less than a second, the entire world distorted around you, and then, you weren’t in your house anymore.

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A/N: Aww that was so cute wasn't it? Now it's time to strap on, we're about to dive head-first into the darkest side of the story, and it's going to be fun and sad and just a rollercoaster of emotions in general. Love, Lils xx

Read more Marauders Fiction

[mothdruid]

Home for the Holidays

pairing: bradley "rooster" bradshaw x reader

summary: Bradley might have lied about having a girlfriend. His best friend, you, decide to help him out and go home for the holidays with him. As the trip unfolds, so does your and Bradley's feelings for one another.

wc: 19.2k

warning: 18+, mdni, fluff, mild angst, smut, slow burn, pet names (babe), fake dating, kissing, unprotected sex, penetrative sex (p in v), oral sex (afab receiving), vaginal fingering, drinking (reader gets drunk), crying, bob being a good friend

a/n: hello! it's finally here!!!! thank you all for being patient with me while i finished this up

"You did what?" It was shocking, hearing Bradley word vomit every bad decision he made in the past two days. Seeming as how they all included you without your knowledge.

"It was an accident." Bradley said, lips in a slight downturn as he wrapped a hand around the back of his neck. 

"That is not an accident, Bradley. It's a fucking lie." You looked at him in disbelief. This was much much worse than just an accident. You turned and started walking away from him, but alas, he followed you. 

"It's not like you're doing anything for the holidays." Bradley pleaded. 

"You don't know that." You arrived at your office, sitting in your desk chair quickly.  

"Actually, I do ‘cause you told me last week you were planning on staying at home, getting wine drunk while watching Face Off." You glared at him, hating the fact he had such an impeccable memory. Bradley leaned against your desk, staring down at you while adjusting his reading glasses. 

"I'm not your girlfriend though. How will your family feel when they find that out?" Bradley rolled his eyes. He made a wave of his hand in the air.

"They won't find out. Come on, we both took intro to acting in college, it won't be hard to fake it." 

"Bradley, what did you tell them? Like explain it all word for word." 

"Already did tha-"

"No, you word vomited." He huffed this time. 

"Fine. Mav asked me if I was bringing anyone home. I told him I wasn't sure if I was coming home. Amelia then teased me about being alone and maybe my pride got the best of me." It was your turn to let out a huff. 

"That's an understatement." 

"So, then I said that I would be coming home, and bringing my girlfriend." Bradley looked at you with puppy dog eyes.

"Which is apparently me." You crossed your arms over your chest, leaning back into your chair. 

"Yes." A soft smile tugged at the corners of his lips. 

"You owe me a big favor if I do this." Bradley smiled at your reply.

“I’ll do all your extra paperwork for a month.” The offer was tempting, but you knew it wouldn’t fully make up for this. 

It wasn’t that you didn’t know Bradley’s family, or at least what he had left of it. His biological parents had passed away when he was young, leaving his god-parents to take care of him. You had met Pete and Penny during your college graduation. They were extremely kind people, inviting you out for a celebration dinner afterwards. But that was partially why you were nervous, they knew you on a surface level. 

You had never met Amelia, only hearing about her through Bradley and seeing pictures. Bradley adored the girl, talking about her like a sister. Which wasn’t too far off. It was his god-daughter. Reminding you that Bradley’s ‘family’ wasn’t his biological family, not that it made a difference. They treated him as if he was their own, which was all that mattered. 

“Bradley, I’ll have to think about it.” 

After a few days to mull it over you decided to go. Even making a pros and cons list to help you decide. Bradley was ecstatic, sending you back a thumbs up and smiley blushing emoji. He then sent you a longer text explaining the plans for the trip. 

The office would close on the 22nd of December, allowing you guys to fly out on the 23rd. Then you wouldn’t be returning home until December 31st. You two would be flying out to Michigan, the state where Penny and Pete had raised Bradley. Which also happened to be where the two of you attended university together. It was truly a beautiful state, one that you missed a little bit. The winters were something you never fully got used to, but who ever gets used to a winter like that. 

-

The plane ride to Michigan wasn’t bad, only a two hour flight. Bradley picked up a rental car after landing so the two of you would be able to drive wherever. Pete and Penny lived around where ‘up north’ started. It was a smaller town close to the city you two went to university at. So, it was pertinent that the two of you had a car to go places whenever you wanted. The two of you loaded your luggage into the back of the car, silently praising that Bradley was smart enough to get an SUV for the trip. You made sure you grab your blanket out of your bag before settling into the passenger seat. 

“Two hours?” You asked while you placed your blanket over your legs. 

“It’s the same drive from when we were in college.” Bradley stated as he sat in the driver seat, placing the key in the ignition. You adjusted your heating settings, switching your side to max heat while Bradley adjusted his to a low heat. 

“Bradley, it’s been years since I’ve been here.” He relaxed back into the seat, shifting the gear in the center console before leaving the lot. You watched as he smiled and used one hand on the wheel, the other still resting on the gear. 

“This will be a fun refresher trip then.” Bradley said as he looked at you before focusing back on the road. 

“There is a reason why I left Michigan, you too.” White man-made hills of snow were everywhere, reminding you of your university years. The years when you and Bradley became friends. You had thought that moving to Michigan for college wouldn’t be bad, it only being four years. But you were wrong. The winters there were cold and wet, making you a hermit for almost half the year.

“The snow isn’t that bad.” You pulled your black and grey heathered beanie off your head and tossed it on your side of the dashboard. There was an odd flutter when you looked at him, his smile seeming brighter than normal.

“You say that because you grew up here.” You pointed at him, a mocking grimace on your face. Bradley chuckled at your look, swatting your finger away. 

“What? Afraid we might get stuck in the freezing cold?” You pulled the blanket up over your arms and chest, rolling your eyes at his question. “Can you pull up the GPS, maybe connect your phone to the car for music too?” 

“Am I gonna have to take requests?” You raised an eyebrow at him. Bradley’s lips quirked to one side as you started to fiddle with the touch screen in the rental. 

“Honestly, as long as you get the directions pulled up I’ll let you listen to whatever.” Bradley said as he finally made it onto the freeway. A part of you wondered why he even needed the GPS working when it was a straight shot. That was one you enjoyed about Michigan, I-75. The freeway that could take you all the way from Canada to Florida. It was practically the straight shot to anywhere in Michigan, except the western side of the state and most of the upper peninsula. But you indulged him, pulling the GPS up. 

“So, are there any specific plans for the holidays?” You put your music on shuffle, keeping it at a low volume. Bradley shrugged. 

“All I’m really aware of is Christmas Eve and Christmas day. They know we are heading out on New Year’s eve. But we might have a gathering during the week.” You laid your seat back a little bit, getting more comfortable as Bradley stayed focused on the road. 

“I’ll assume that Christmas Eve and Christmas are gonna be with the family. But what are we doing during the week? Besides lounging of course.” There were a few thumps as Bradley hit some classic Michigan potholes. 

“Of course. We are having a little get together.” Bradley muttered. You could tell he was hiding something. 

“Bradley, don’t lie to me anymore.” You squinted at him. Bradley brought a hand to the back of his neck, scratching awkwardly and the crunch of the material of his winter coat drowned out the music. 

“I uh.. I might have agreed to a little college reunion with the gang.” College reunion? With ‘the gang’? That wasn’t what you signed up for. You had signed up for hot cocoa and presents with his family, being awkwardly teased about a relationship that didn’t exist. Faking a relationship in front of their friends wasn’t in the deal. You shot up out of your seat, turning to face him better.

“You what? Bradley! I’m not doing this,” you gestured between the two of you, “in front of them.” Bradley’s face scrunched up as he looked at you. You swatted at his arm, earning a fake yelp from him as he pulled away from you. 

“Hey! I’m driving!” 

“Crash the car now then! They can’t think we are together!” Bradley rolled his eyes. 

“I’m not crashing the car, it’s a rental. Plus, it’s not like Hangman doesn’t already think that.” You let out a huff while the car went over another pothole.

“Jake can’t know about this little deal we have. He’d get off on it too much.” 

“Well, none of them have to know about it. We can keep it a secret.” Another pothole. You turned the music up then curled back up into your seat. You knew that was too hopeful, everyone of your friends would know immediately. Especially Bob and Natasha. Bradley focused back on the road after he made sure you were done arguing. 

He knew why you wouldn’t want the group to think you two were dating, many of them having bet money on your relationship status every year of university. But Jake had always been the most relentless. Bradley decided to push that thought to the back of his mind, focusing on the road while occasionally looking over at your now sleeping form. 

Bradley looked over as you started to rustle, sleep still covering your features. For a split second he smiled, taking in how adorable you looked. Bradley blushed at his own thoughts, focusing back on the road. You rubbed at your eyes, looking around the car and stretching out your arms. Bradley leaned a bit away from you as one of your hands moved into his space while you stretched. 

“Morning sleepyhead.” Bradley said as you sat up and moved your seat back upright. Bradley chuckled when you shot a glare at him. You looked out the window, noticing larger mounds of snow littering the area. There had to be at least a foot of snow in the surrounding area. You grabbed your beanie from the dashboard, putting it back on. You weren’t even outside but you could already feel the lower temperature. 

“How far away are we?” You asked, switching the song.

“GPS says twenty minutes, but I think I can make it in fifteen.” Bradley joked with a wink. You shot him a playful look before checking your phone. There was a text from Bob, making you smile. 

He was still one of you best friends from college, the both of you texting occasionally. You had met him at college, just like the rest of your friend group. Him and Mickey had been the only ones that weren’t so annoying about your relationship with Bradley. It was a short text, but one that had your nose scrunching up.

Bobert: You going home with Brad?

You: yeah, but it isn’t anything like that

You: also don’t call him that, it’s weird

Bobert: says the person who calls him B

The twenty minutes flew by quickly, taking in all of the surroundings outside. Bradley was right when he said it was a small town. You were pretty sure there were only three stop lights in the entire town. The town seemed dead, as most towns did during the winter in Michigan. Most people bundled up inside, drinking hot cocoa, and watching Christmas movies with their families. Or at least that was what you did while you were here. Bundled up in your dorm or apartment, depending on the year, while sipping hot cocoa with an iconic Christmas movie on. Bradley and Jake always teased you about being scrooge, but you couldn’t help that the ‘merry season’ just didn’t bring much merriment for you. 

Bradley turned down streets that you definitely weren’t going to remember, before turning into a driveway of a home. It was an obvious two story home. The outside of the house was covered in mismatching stones, a nice cement porch attached to the front. Dead bushes lined the edge of the driveway next to the house, wrapping around near the porch. There were lights covering and the edges of the roof, currently off due to it being daytime. You could make out small wire frames of a few deer lawn ornaments.

“This your childhood home?” You asked as you undid your seatbelt to get out. Bradley’s mustache twitched, a small curve to his lips. It looked almost like a nostalgic but melancholic look. His hazel eyes were full of emotions when he looked at you. It had been years since Bradley came home for the holidays, mainly spending his holidays alone now. 

“Sure is.” Bradley undid his own seatbelt, opening the driver door and getting out of the car. You quickly followed suit, the both of you heading to get the back of the car to get your luggage. 

A shiver ran through your body as you followed Bradley’s lead, making your way to the side door of the house. All you could think about was getting inside, the warmth of the home calling to you. A part of you was hoping that Penny might already have hot cocoa prepared for you two, even though the chances were low. Bradley knocked on the door, making sure to not hit the wreath hanging on it. Bradley stood on the small set of cement steps towards the door, creating an extremely large height difference. Bradley wiggled his eyebrows playfully as you two waited for someone to answer. 

“Are you sure they are home?” You rocked back and forth lightly, trying to generate some extra warmth. Bradley tilted his head and gave you a weird look. 

“Penny and Mav are retired. Plus, Amelia is on break from school. One of them has to be home.” Bradley stated as he leaned over to try and look in the windows near the door. “Or at least I’m pretty sure someone should be here.” Bradley smiled awkwardly at you before the door swung open. 

“What are you doing here?” A young blonde haired girl said with a glare. 

“Are you home alone?” Bradley questioned. You watched the two of them, taking in their casual conversation. You knew this was Amelia, recognizing some of her features. “You gonna let us in or nah?” Bradley’s question caught your attention. 

“Yeah, please. It’s really cold out here.” You finally spoke up, earning a smile from Amelia. 

“You’re lucky you brought your girlfriend Roo, or else I’d make you sleep in the garage.” Amelia smiled brightly after her words, opening the door and stepping out of the way. There was an odd feeling in your chest, when she called you Bradlye’s girlfriend. You offered an awkward smile to her, not sure if you would ever get used to being called Bradley’s girlfriend. The two of you grabbed your suitcases and made your way inside. It was a relief to feel the heat of the home engulf your body. 

“I’ll remember that when it’s Christmas morning.” Bradley quipped as he took his beanie off, you mimicking his action. Amelia stuck her tongue out, leaving the small foyer-like room. There were pictures of Bradley and Amelia adorning the walls in the foyer with the occasional Christmas decoration of the wall. The ages of them ranged from toddler to Bradley’s university graduation. One picture stood out to you though. It was toddler Bradley with two people you had never met. A gentle and kind looking woman next to a man with a pair of aviator sunglasses on and a goofy smile. The man was holding Bradley on his hip, an outdoor grill obvious in the background. Bradley must have realized you were staring at the picture, him standing a bit closer to you. 

“That’s mom and dad.” You turned to see Bradley merely inches away from your face. A heat you had noticed earlier started to boil under your cheeks. “I’ll tell you more about them later. Let’s get our stuff upstairs.” 

Bradley led the way through the comforting home, more Christmas decorations littering the home the deeper you got. It gave you an immediate sense of security, knowing that nothing wrong could happen here. The walls inside the home were adorned with more family pictures. You saw some of just Mav and Bradley’s dad, even ones of teenage Bradley and his mom. You knew that Bradley had lost his parents from a car accident, just had never seen what they looked like. The two of you made your way up the wrapping staircase. 

“So, we are sharing a room.” Bradley said as you made your way down the hallway. 

“We are what now?” Bradley opened the door to what you assumed was his old bedroom. It was more of a spare room now though, no old traces of Bradley lingering in it. There was only one bed. Of course there was only one bed. 

“That’s fine, but only one bed?” You questioned. Bradley scooted his suitcase to the side of the room, offering you a smile. 

“I’ll sleep on the floor, I promise.” 

“Good, cause I’m not sharing.” You playfully elbowed his arm, smirking when he made an over exaggerated yelp.  

After getting your suitcases sorted and unpacked you made your way downstairs. You found Amelia sitting in the living room, some type of docu-series on the tv. You sat on the couch opposite of her, checking your phone. Not only did you have a text from Bob, but one from Mickey now too. 

Bobert: (; sure it ain’t 

Mickey: how am i finding out from bob you’re with rooster for the holidays????

You rolled your eyes, deciding that neither of them deserved a response. You looked up from your phone, meeting Amelia’s gaze. You offered a small wave to her, not sure how to start a conversation with her. 

“So, have you two always been together?” Amelia crossed her arms and sunk further into the couch. Your eyebrows knitted together. 

“No? Why wou-” 

“You two went to CMU together, right?” You nodded. “And were you dating then?” 

“No, why are you-” 

“Hey!” Bradley interrupted you, coming into the living room and sitting next to you. He wrapped an arm behind you, pressing his body closely to yours. You could feel a small flutter in your stomach, something you had vaguely felt before. Especially with Bradley. 

Being this close with Bradley wasn’t unfamiliar, it was something you enjoyed from time to time. It was just nice to have someone there occasionally, that someone being Bradley. But this was different. You two were technically boyfriend and girlfriend right now. A couple. It made you feel something weird, something you couldn’t pinpoint exactly. All you knew was that it made your body act differently. A warmth was blossoming behind your cheeks, heart fluttering from his looks and smiles, hands developing a clamminess. 

“What are the two of you talking about?” Bradley asked with a big smile, his arm pulling you a little more snug into him. 

“You.” Amelia said with a playful glare. It was Bradley’s turn to poke his tongue out at her. The two of them started to talk while you watched them. If you hadn’t known Bradley for years, you would have thought this was his sibling. Amelia was that of sorts, even if she was about thirteen years younger than him. Bradley was an only child, but the conversation you were witnessing made you question that fact. 

“Well what about me?” Bradley asked. 

“That you should shave your mustache.” Amelia quipped. You couldn’t hide your giggle, only to be met with an offended look from Bradley. 

“There’s no way. You love my mustache don’t you, babe?” The heat flooded your cheeks once more. 

“I-I mean, I forgot what you look like without it. You’ve had it for years.” 

“You can be honest. It looks bad.” Amelia harped from her side of the living room. Bradley went to say something, stopping when he heard the door open. Amelia shot Bradley a playful look, getting up and running over to the kitchen. Suddenly you could feel Bradley’s breath on your cheek and neck, making your heartbeat pick up. 

“Sorry about all of this.” Bradley gestured to where the two of your bodies were pressed together. You turned to look at him, your eyes locking with his hazel ones. There were only a few mere inches between the two of you. “Gotta sell the part, ya know?” 

“No, no, I totally get it.” You patted at the top of his thigh, rubbing your hand lightly on his jean clad thigh. Your eyes flicked to his lips then to his eyes again. It was like something clicked in your brain, you immediately looked away from him making a small cough-like noise. “Sorry, scratch in my throat.”

Without warning Mav walked in, causing Bradley to stand up and separate from you. It was the most miniscule thing, but you were relieved. You gave Mav a smile, waving at Penny as she came around. Even though you felt welcome, all you could think about was the flight back home. 

-

“No, Bob!” You whispered on the phone. “He was like inches away, like if either of us were bumped, there would have been lip to lip contact.” You heard a small snicker. “What are you laughing about?” 

“About you coming to your senses.” You rolled your eyes, sitting down on the bed you’d be sleeping in later. 

“There aren't any ‘senses’ for me to come to.” What the fuck was Bob talking about anyway? 

“Sure there aren’t. But if you don’t see it, I’m not gonna tell you.” Bob’s shit eating grin could be heard through the phone. 

“Good, ‘cause there is nothing to be seen.” You were about to continue the conversation before Bradley walked into the room, closing the door behind him. He wore an old marron Central Michigan University t-shirt, gray sweatpants, towel still in hand, hair wet. Something inside of you lurched seeing Bradley like this, seeing him so casual and domestic. It wasn’t like how you used to see him in college, there was something different now. 

“I gotta let you go, Bob. I’ll text you.”  There was a small silence between you and Bradley before he spoke. 

“How’s Bob?” Bradley asked, gathering the extra blankets he found earlier. He laid a comforter down on the floor next to the bed. You pulled your legs up onto the bed, trying to keep them out of his way while he assembled his makeshift bed. You grabbed one of the pillows from the head of the bed and plopped it down on his comforter. 

“Bob is, Bob is fine.” Bradley got down on his knees, rolling out the blankets and fluffing the pillow you tossed down. Another silence. 

“Hey, I… I’m sorry about earlier and dinner. If I’m being a bit too much,” he looked up at you, “just let me know. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” A sincere look was on his features.

“Bradley..”

“I just need this holiday to go well, okay?” A small amount of emotion had slipped into Bradley’s sincere look. 

“Bradley, what is this really about?” Bradley looked away from you. 

“I know you don’t want to be here, but please. I need to show Mav that I’m doing well.” You watched Bradley with a smile as he started talking with his hands. It was kind of cute, something he did when he got nervous. “He keeps harping on me and I just-” You took his hands in yours, stopping the movements. Bradley finally looked back up at you, making you smile. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me this when you asked me?” You thought about dinner, how Mav kept asking questions. When did you two officially get together? When are you gonna move in together? Did you always like each other? Any thoughts about marriage? 

“I didn’t want you to feel pressured about the entire thing. Like if you didn’t want to come, you didn’t have to. Mav is just a little overbearing, and has been since my parents passed. He just-” 

“Bradley,” he stopped his rambling, “I’m your friend, okay? Friends help friends. And that unfortunately means maybe pretending to be your friend's girlfriend to make it seem like he is doing good in life with his god-father.” Bradley’s lips cracked into a smile at your words. 

“Thanks. I knew there was a reason why I call you my best friend.” A small flutter in your chest was noticeable as you smiled back at him. 

“You’re gonna owe me so much take-out and coffee after this.” 

-

It was Christmas Eve and all five of you were in the living room. It was apparently tradition for Bradley and his family to watch Space-Balls on Christmas Eve, followed by some assortment of Christmas movies afterwards. Pete and Penny were on one couch, Penny curled up under Pete’s arm. Amelia was curled up on a recliner, bundled up with a fleece blanket. Then there was you and Bradley. Bradley sat at one end of the couch, you laid out at the other end with your legs stretching out. Your feet were currently set on Bradley’s lap, one of his hands rested on your shin while the other was curled around the heel of one foot. 

Everyone was focused on the movie, laughing at the jokes they had laughed at before. But you weren’t focused on the movie. Yes, it was one of your favorites. How could it not be, seeing Bill Pullman pull out such a stellar comedy performance. But alas, you were focused on your best friend. 

After your conversation last night, it was easier. All of it. The small touches of Bradley’s fingertips or hands, the invasion of your ‘bubble’ became more bearable too. Even the small things your body was doing. Everytime Bradley laughed it warmed you, making you forget about the ten degree weather outside. The way your heart fluttered when he looked at you, it was oddly exciting. Has that always happened when he looked at you? 

You felt a squeeze on your heel, pulling you out of your thoughts. Bradley was giving you a questioning look, silently asking if you were okay with another squeeze of your heel. After giving him a soft smile and nod he turned back to the movie. Bradley had always been a type of comfort to you, but this was a different kind of comfort he was providing now. The movie played on, earning a few giggles and chuckles from you and the others. It wasn’t until the end of the movie any of you noticed the new snowflakes flurrying beyond the window pane. 

“Fresh snow!” Amelia shouted, whipping around in the recliner to look out the window behind her. You sat up a little bit, pulling the blanket on your lap up around you while inching closer to Bradley.

“Wonder how long it’s been snowing.” Bradley whispered as you leaned into him. The blanket you had was warm, but you wanted more warmth. You silently thanked whatever higher power for making Bradley a walking furnace. 

“Not sure.” Bradley wrapped an arm around you, pulling you tighter into him. You looked across the living room, catching a look from Mav. There was this look of adoration in his eyes as he watched you and Bradley. A small pang of guilt struck you, feeling bad about fooling him. But if this was what Bradley wanted, you would help. You weren’t going to be around when it blew up anyways, when Bradley had to explain why you had ‘broken up’ or that it was all fake. 

“Let’s go outside! Make a snowman or something!” Amelia turned back around and sat up. 

“I don’t know about that one.” Penny said, sitting up on the couch. “It’s pretty cold outside.” 

“We will wear our coats, hats and gloves. Promise.” Amelia held out her pinky to her mother, signaling a pinky promise. Mav chuckled at her before speaking. 

“And who is we?” Amelia shrugged at Mav’s question. 

“Me and Bradley.” It was Bradley’s turn to sit up straight, making you sit up straight. 

“Hey, I didn’t agree to that.” Bradley said, his arms still around you. 

“Please?” Amelia asked, putting on her best puppy dog eyes. Bradley rolled his eyes.

“Fine but only if she comes out too.” Bradley smirked as he gestured to you. You sat back from him, giving him an astonished look. 

“If I-”

“Pretty please. I wanna go do snow angels, but I don’t wanna go alone.” Amelia interrupted you, now giving you puppy dog eyes. You didn’t want to ruin her mood. 

“Only if I get to pick the next Christmas movie.” Everyone agreed to let you pick the next Christmas movie. You, Bradley, and Amelia hunted down your winter gear. Bradley made sure to tie your boots tight for you, knowing that you didn’t want to risk getting snow in them. Amelia grabbed your arm, tugging you down for her to whisper something. 

“Let’s pelt him with snowballs.” 

The three of you went outside, hats pulled down and far as possible. Amelia ran through the snow coating the driveway, missing the cars as she made her way to the front yard. You and Bradley walked to the yard, seeing Amelia with her arms out and wide, twirling as she caught snowflakes with her tongue. It made you smile, seeing her enjoy the very essence of what winter was. Bradley watched you, taking in your expression. He felt something blossom inside of him, not being able to place what it was exactly. 

“Ready for snow angels?” You joked, elbowing him lightly. Bradley smiled at you, before nodding and leading the way. Penny and Pete watched your snow angel joy turn into a snowball fight, you and Amelia teaming up against Bradley. 

“They’re cute.” Penny said as she watched Bradley fall down as Amelia tackled him into the snow. All Mav could do was nod, smiling as he watched the three of you. He had never seen Bradley so happy, let alone so happy with another person. 

-

“The, the, the, the Grinch!” Bradley mocked, repeating the line of your favorite Christmas movie as you two made it up the stairs. After coming back inside from a thorough snowball fight, you forced everyone to sit through the live-action Grinch. 

It was late now, the two of you making your way up to your shared room. Bradley shot you a pair of finger guns before gathering his clothes, heading into the bathroom. It was his way of giving you privacy while changing. The both of you hoped that Amelia never saw it, not wanting her to catch on to your charade. You slipped into your sleepwear, your own Central Michigan University t-shirt and sweatpants. You checked your phone after you set your dirty clothes in the clothes basket. There were a few messages from your dagger squad group chat and a few from Bob. 

Dagger Squad, Nat: Midland Street? Right? 

Dagger Squad, Jakey: i mean, fricks is an option

Dagger Squad, Javs: only saying fricks cause you live there

Dagger Squad, Jakey: sue me

Dagger Squad, BradBrad: Either spot, can’t be out late. Have to drive afterwards

You squinted at the time of Bradley’s message, seeing it was only from a few minutes ago. You typed out a small reply to the group chat, explaining you also had a drive before looking at Bob’s texts. 

Bobert: How’s the trip? 

Bobert: You’re not mad about our convo, right? 

Bobert: Sorry if I was out of line. 

Bobert: Y’all coming to the get together? 

You thought Bradley had told everyone you two would be there. 

You: yeah, just have to drive afterwards. and no, i’m not mad, just had to watch a lot of christmas movies and beat bradley’s ass in a snowball fight 

A beat barely passed when a notification dropped down, a text to the group chat from Jake. 

Dagger Squad, Jakey: just one of you lovebirds dd, i got a spare room if you need it (;

You rolled your eyes, just in time for Bradley to walk in the room. He had his phone in hand, staring at the screen as he closed the door. He turned to look at you, holding his phone out for you to see the screen. The group chat was pulled up on his screen. 

“Are you seeing this?” You held up your phone, showing him the group chat on your screen. 

“Grade-A asshole.” You joked about Jake. You climbed into bed, curling up under the plush comforter. You scooted to the edge, looking at Bradley as he settled onto his makeshift bed. 

“Sometimes I wonder why we are friends with him.” Bradley stated, plugging his charger into the phone and setting it on the nightstand. He picked up your charger cord, handing it to you for you to plug your phone in.

“It’s crazy how any of us are friends.” You said while plugging  your phone in. 

“How so?” Bradley asked, looking up at you from the floor. Your heart swelled as you looked at him, his honey locks disheveled against the pillow. There was a tiredness that was settling on his features, one that was most likely settling onto yours too. 

“I mean, aside from us, we all have different majors. It’s kind of surprising we all managed to stay friends after pre-req years.” Bradley shrugged. He tried hard not to smile as he stared up at you, your cute peeking form over the edge of the bed. The two of you just stared at each other for a moment before you spoke up again. 

“Should we set an alarm for the morning? Don’t wanna miss any presents.” Bradley shook his head no. 

“I promise you, they won’t open anything before we get down there.” You rolled back onto the bed completely, rolling onto your side. 

“Goodnight, Bradley.”

“Goodnight, babe.” 

-

The two of you were awoken by Penny knocking on your door. After confirmation the two of you were awake she told the two of you to be downstairs in ten minutes. Bradley groaned as he rolled onto his side. You checked your phone, seeing a text from Mickey, Bob, and the dagger squad group chat. You looked at the time, 9:25am, then decided to ignore the texts. Those were a future you problem. Without warning Bradley stood up, not facing you and leaving the room. 

It was odd, he at least told you good morning yesterday before heading to the bathroom. You changed into an old university sweater, waiting for Bradley to return. After a few minutes you decided to head down alone, knowing Bradley would be close to follow. 

The smell of cinnamon rolls flooded your senses, making you smile. You saw Penny and Amelia in the kitchen, talking about something while preparing the cinnamon rolls. You made your way to the first floor bathroom, deciding to use it before interacting for the day. After using the bathroom you made your way to the living room. Pete smiled at you once he saw you. 

“Merry Christmas!” Mav greeted you before frowning. “Where’s Bradley?” You shrugged. 

“Went to the bathroom in a hurry and I haven’t seen him since.” Mav nodded, a weird half frown half smirk on his lips. You went to question the look before Bradley walked into the living room. His cheeks had a rosy tint to them, making you question why he left for the bathroom even more. 

“Morning.” You greeted as he sat next to you. Bradley smiled and just nodded to you, turning his attention to Mav quickly. 

“We just put the cinnamon rolls in, so let’s do some presents.” Penny informed as she sat next to Mav. Amelia sat at her classic recliner, staring at the gifts under the Christmas tree. 

“It’s present time.” And with those words gifts were passed around. Bradley had explained on the plane ride that Mav and Penny had his presents shipped to his apartment. It made sense, flying made it hard to bring anything back with you during the holidays. But that didn’t stop them from getting the two of you new beanies and scarves, things that wouldn’t be hard to take on a plane. 

“We know it’s small but we couldn’t leave you out.” Penny said as you set the items on the arm of the couch. 

“Thank you, it means a lot.” Penny smiled then excused herself to check on the cinnamon rolls in the oven. Bradley watched Amelia with a soft smile as she shoved a present towards Mav.

Seeing Bradley like this made your heart ache, knowing that he wasn’t able to experience this every year. It was lonely living away from everything you knew. You had left your home state for college, Bradley left his for work. You had happened to both get employed by the same company after university, forcing you two to stay close. But there was a kind of comfort in having each other. Bradley’s constant open availability for a movie night and you always paying for his take out was a match made in heaven. Without a further thought you nudged him lightly. 

“You okay?” Bradley nodded, that kind tilt of his lips still on his face. 

“Of course, what makes you ask?” Bradley leaned back into the couch, placing his arm around you. There was an unspoken comfortability in the small action, for you and Bradley. You leaned into him, eyes never leaving Amelia and Pete. 

“You never said good morning.” That rosy tint crept back into Bradley’s cheeks. His eyes flicked to yours briefly before leaning in, his hot breath against the shell of your ear. 

“Sorry, I won’t let it happen again.” It was now your turn for a heat to rise in your cheeks, warming you to your very core. Was Bradley flirting with you? Your brain short-circuited, replying without thinking it through. 

“You better not.” You whispered back, leaning closer into him to see Mav open a coffee mug saying “I’m a Pielat, Pielit, Pilat, I can fly” which earned a hearty chuckle from him. 

Bradley kept his arm around you for the rest of the day, except when you enjoyed Penny’s homemade cinnamon rolls that you made sure to get the recipe for. Maybe you would make them for you and Bradley sometime, to remind him of home when he needed it the most. A warmth spread through you at that thought, the idea of being able to provide him a sense of home. You shook your head, trying to push your thoughts away. Why were you even thinking that? Providing Bradley a sense of home? The two of you were friends, not an actual couple you reminded yourself of. 

-

Bradley was beyond elated with how the trip was going. It was only three days into the trip, but your sentiment about it all had changed. Bradley was surprised when you let him, continually, wrap his arm around you. He liked keeping you close to him, snuggled into his side as you all watched more Christmas movies. There was a warmth spreading through his chest, creeping into all of his crevices. It was making him whole, fixing all the cracks that were inside of him previously. He knew that you had something to do with it. 

Maybe it was the way you teased him along with his family. Or how you fit in with them so well, holding any conversation like you’d known them personally for years. The way you made snow angels charmed him too, even though you had turned into a little devil that pelted him with snowballs. Even when you were peeking over the edge of the bed, staring down at him with your wide eyes while complaining about Jake. Or maybe it was the dream he had, where dream him was fucking dream you in his childhood bedroom. Or how he couldn’t get the images of dream you moaning underneath of him. 

The feeling wasn’t completely unfamiliar, he had felt it in the past. He had always tried to ignore it, not wanting to mess anything up with you. But you were his best friend, and had been since college. What was a friendship if you didn’t sometimes love them a little too much? Right? 

It was late now though, and you were still curled up under his arm. You looked peaceful, sleep having taken over during the final christmas movie after dinner. Bradley didn’t want to wake you, wishing the two of you could stay like this forever. He didn’t get many chances to see you this peaceful. He eventually pushed those feelings to the side, deciding it was best to get you up to the bed. He didn’t want to chance you waking up in the middle of the night on the couch disoriented. 

“Hey,” Bradley nudged your shoulder, “gotta get up. Get you up to bed, can’t have you sleeping on the couch or me all night.” You rustled a little, eyes fluttering open to meet his hazel orbs. 

“Why not?” You asked with a yawn. 

“Because I’m not a bed. Plus, you gotta brush your teeth.” You gave him a face that read ‘ah’, sitting up and stretching your arms. You looked around to see just the two of you in the living room. 

“Did everyone go to bed?” 

“Yeah, everyone turned in for the night.” Bradley sat up a little bit, looking at you with this soft look. You stared at him with a sleepy look, making his heart flutter. You looked so damn cute to him. “I can carry you, if you’d like?” 

A heat flooded your cheeks from his offer. You shook your head as Bradley stood up, holding his hand out for you to take. You looked at it skeptically through your sleepy haze, eventually taking it. His large hand enveloped yours, leading you up to your room. Bradley gathered his things and scurried to the bathroom, leaving you alone in the bedroom. A part of you was starting to question why he left every time. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen you naked before, even though the times he had seen you it was an accident. 

You slowly pulled your beat up CMU sweater off, tossing it on the floor to track down your t-shirt. You put a pair of sweatpants on, t-shirt still missing. You looked around, searching for the maroon t-shirt. The door to the room opened while you were searching, revealing a shirtless Bradley with your maroon shirt in his hands. He stared at your shirtless figure, only a black bralette covering your tits. 

“I- uh.. I accidentally grabbed your shirt.” Bradley offered the maroon material out to you. 

It was as if you were frozen, staring at his body. You remembered how toned Bradley was in college, but he had changed with age just like you had. He was still slim, but it wasn’t all muscle like he used to be. The heat returned to your cheeks, radiating into the back of your neck and chest. It was a christmas miracle you tore your gaze away, only to catch Bradley’s gaze crawling all over your exposed skin. Bradley had a rosy tint to his cheeks again, something that was a common theme today. He tore his gaze away, turning his head and holding the shirt out a little more. 

“And you thought I was the tired one.” It was a poor attempt to break the new tension between the two of you. Bradley cracked an awkward smile. “I’m gonna go brush my teeth.” You said, scooting past Bradley with your t-shirt in hand. After you brushed your teeth you stared at yourself in the mirror, wondering what the hell was going on with you. 

-

"Rooster, can you come help me?" The basement door was wide open in the kitchen, Maverick at the bottom of the stairs leading into the basement. You raised your eyebrows at Bradley, who was sitting across from you at the table. 

A chill had consumed the house all morning. Everyone was bundled up in sweaters, sweatpants, cozy socks, and Bradley in a beanie. Mav had made sure to keep an eye on the thermostat, slowly watching the temp drop. Penny had left for work already, leaving Maverick responsible for figuring out the dropping heating problem. Bradley made his way to the door, asking for good luck before heading down to the basement. As Bradley's footsteps trailed to silence, your phone vibrated. 

Mickey: y'all fuck yet????

You rolled your eyes, not noticing Amelia watching you from the kitchen. 

You: we aren't gonna fuck like that

You: you’re as bad as jake

Mickey: like that??? 

You: we aren't fucking at all

Mickey: that's not what a little bird told me 

You: if you mean bob, that's not what I told him 

Mickey: it was an actual bird. or at least a mythical one (;

"A mythical bird?" You quietly asked. The text glared at you, racking the crevices of your brain. 

"Like a Phoenix?" Amelia's playful tone cut through your thoughts. 

Phoenix. Of course it was Phoenix. 

Natasha Trace was Bradley's second best friend, right after you. She went to the same high school as Bradley, and the same university as the rest of you. In college she earned the nickname Phoenix from Jake, after a wild night of partying and her being completely unphased the day after. If you had been telling Bob about what happened, there was a chance that Bradley was telling Natasha. Maybe Bradley thought all these interactions were just as weird. 

"You two are dating, right?" Amelia's voice interrupted your train of thought again. She scuttled in from the kitchen to the dining room, a blanket wrapped around her and her sweatshirt hood pulled up. She stared at you from the edge of the table. 

"What makes you ask that?" 

"First, you didn't say yes. Second, Bradley had never mentioned you prior. Just makes me wonder things." Her words weren't hurtful, she just wanted to know. Contemplation wavered in you for a moment, deciding whether to tell Amelia the truth or not. 

“Don’t tell your mom and Mav. And don’t tell Bradley that I told you this either.” Amelia’s smirk grew wide at your words. 

“I knew it!” An excited whisper left her, accompanied by a finger pointing at you. You rolled your shoulders and tilted your head at her. 

“Bradley needed someone to bring home since Mav kept asking if he was seeing anyone. And now here I am, in the freezing cold with you.” Amelia snickered at your last comment. She was a sweet girl, you could feel the secret was safe with her. 

“Bradley had never mentioned you, so I thought it was a little weird.” She admitted while pulling out a chair to sit. A nod and smile was all you were able to give her. “It’s not that you guys aren’t believable, because you are. The looks you two give each other? Those are on par with mom and Mav.” You squinted while tilting your head, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. Amelia laughed. “Why are you giving me that look?” 

“What?” Amelia’s eyes widened at your question. An at home theater had formed in your brain, replaying all of the moments of the trip in your brain. 

“Are you serious?” You just stared at her in disbelief. “You’re just as oblivious as Bradley.” The both of you turned to look at the door to the basement, hearing footsteps climbing the stairs. Pete was the first one to emerge, Bradley right on his tail. Bradley smiled awkwardly, looking between you and Amelia. He clearly knew something was up between the two of you. 

“Well, the furnace is out. Gonna have to call the H-VAC company.” Pete looked defeated, fishing his phone out of his pocket. He walked over to the sink, leaning against it as he googled the local company. Bradley made his way over to your chair, placing a hand on your back and rubbing lightly. All you could do was stare at Amelia, watching as her lips curved into a grin. 

“You two good?” Bradley questioned, his hand stilling on your back. Amelia looked up at Bradley with that grin on her lips.

“Just fine, Roo. Why wouldn’t we be?” The gal on this kid was impressing you more and more. You watched Amelia as she put her hands up under her chin, batting her lashes at Bradley. It pulled a giggle out of you, watching her try to soothe Bradley’s suspicion. Bradley scrunched his eyebrows together at Amelia, confused as to why she was acting like this. 

“O-kay. Babe, can you help me pull out some electric heaters from the garage?” You squinted at him, chatter of Mav on the phone filling the background now. 

“Um, why didn’t we get those earlier?” 

“Exactly.” It was nice to hear Amelia agree with you. 

“I asked the same thing,” Bradley leaned down between the two of you, “but you know how he is.” All three of you looked towards the kitchen, seeing Mav pinching the bridge of his nose. None of you could hear his hushed tone. Bradley turned back and stood up, shrugging his shoulders. “Said something about how high the electric bill will be.” 

“Of course he did.” Amelia scoffed, shaking her head in amusement. 

“Yeah, I’ll help with getting the heaters.” In all honesty, you just wanted away from Amelia. You wanted time to process her words, without her being present. 

The two of you bundled up, throwing on your coats and boots before heading out to the garage. Bradley swiped the key to the garage door, letting you out the house first. It felt relieving knowing it was still colder outside, reminding you it wasn’t that cold in the house. Your hands were tightly in your coat pockets, trying to scavenge any type of heat they could find. Bradley headed to the tall wooden gate that separated the backyard from the driveway. His hands rubbed together vigorously, bringing the up to blow warm air against the cold appendages. 

“Forgot gloves?” Bradley smirked at your words.

“Yeah.” It was a soft ‘yeah’, one that made your heart flutter. Bradley was staring at you with this soft look on his face. He looked at your pockets, seeing small movements behind the polyester material. “Forget yours too?” 

All you could do was nod, praying Bradley would open the gate soon.  Which he did, flipping the latch and letting you pass through before him. It was left open as he unlocked the garage door, ushering you into the smaller building. It was colder in the garage than the house, but a few degrees warmer than outside. He left the door slightly cracked as he looked for the heaters. 

Your body had started to waddle in place, trying to produce some amount of heat. You took your hands out of your coat pockets, placing them between your thighs for warmth. It was only once you curled in on yourself a little Bradley noticed you. He made his way over to you, straightening your posture up to talk to you. You were face to face with him, his face a few inches away. 

“Last time you forget gloves, right?” 

“Right.” Bradley reached at your forearms, pulling your hands out from between your thighs. He brought your hands up to his mouth, cupping them with his own. Hot breath coated the cold skin of your hands, setting your insides on fire. Your brain was starting to short circuit, feeling the hairs of Bradley’s mustache poking at your hands. Hazel eyes locked with yours, almost reading your thoughts as they popped into your brain. His lips were almost on your skin, a heat was rising from your chest into your neck and face. But no matter what warning signs your body sent out, you weren’t pulling away. 

Only a few more warm breaths of air coated your hands, Bradley pulling away. His eyes never left yours, hazel orbs peering into your deepest thoughts. His hands left yours though, grabbing his beanie off his head. The fabric was full of his residual warmth, warming your scalp and ears when he placed it on your head. 

“There, all better.” Bradley smiled at you, turning to go back and look for the heaters. 

A few moments passed before Bradley found them, hidden on a shelving unit. Your heart was still pounding from the previous interaction. But a sense of relief had washed over you once they were found. There were only three of them, but the amount didn’t matter to you. You were just glad you actually found them. You grabbed one while Bradley grabbed the other two, you closing the doors and gate while trailing behind him. 

Pete looked defeated when the two of you entered the house. Amelia was still sitting at the table, scrolling through her phone. You and Bradley both gave questioning looks to them, Amelia looked up from her phone to meet your looks. She shrugged and looked back at her phone. Maverick pinched the bridge of his nose once more, a common look for today. 

“What’s up? What’d they say?” Bradley asked as he scooted past Mav, bringing one heater out towards the living room. Mav huffed before responding. 

“Won’t be here til tomorrow.” Your look was laced with surprise and annoyance. Mav must have caught it, throwing his hands up in the air. “You’re telling me. So, we will probably have to rotate the heaters. Keep them on the first floor, then move them to the bedrooms at night.” Bradley returned from the living room, grabbing another space heater to place in the crest of the dining area and living room. After placing the last one in the kitchen, the four of you settle into the living room, bundling up with blankets as you all watch whatever Amelia put on. 

Penny was equally unimpressed with the answer the H-VAC company gave, but at least they knew it would only last a night. A space heater was moved to everyone’s respective rooms, warming them barely. A sweatshirt and sweatpants were your sleep attire for the night, Bradley wearing the same. It was painful watching him crawl on into his makeshift bed. The layers barely helped, the heater not being powerful enough to heat the entire room. That was when you heard a soft chittering. You rolled over to the edge of the bed, looking down to see Bradley curled up in a blanket and shivering. Sharing the bed was the only option to keep the both of you warm.

“Bradley?” One of his eyes opened, peering up at you. 

“Yeah?” 

“Do you wanna share the bed?” Bradley knitted his eyebrows, both eyes open now. 

“I- no, I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” Bradley lightly shook his head. 

“Bradley, you won’t make me uncomfortable.”

“No, I’m not getting in the bed.”

“Why?” A smirk grew on Bradley’s face. 

“You have cooties, obviously.” You rolled your eyes. 

“I’m serious, you’re gonna freeze.”

“And I’m also serious.” Bradley pulled his blanket up over his neck, a shudder running through him. 

"Bradley, I can hear your teeth. Get in the bed." Your whisper was harsh as you tried to convince Bradley to remove himself from the floor. Even though you didn't really want to share the bed, you definitely weren't going to let him freeze to death on the floor of his childhood bedroom.

“Fine.” Was all you heard before Bradley stood up. 

Hot. It was the first word your brain registered when you woke up. Maybe it was the layers or the space heater that had run all night. There was a weight on your midsection, shifting to see what it was. It was hard to make out the familiar arm in your sleep induced haze.. That’s when you remembered inviting Bradley into the bed. His shuddering and shivering form on the floor forcing you to show him mercy. 

The arm tightened, pulling you closer into Bradley’s body. His sweatshirt clad chest was inviting against your sweatshirt clad back. It was telling you to relax and just accept this new fate. The fate of being wrapped up in your best friend's arms, heart racing, hot breath against your neck. It was a truly tragic fate. 

Time passed as you laid there, staring at the empty wall on the other side of the room. It’s blank canvas, oddly taunting you, not letting you forget about your current situation. The idea of checking your phone hadn’t even crossed your mind. You’d rather stay here in this comfortable, yet anxiety inducing scenario. It was obvious that Bradley hadn’t woken up yet or else why would he be spooning you, right? 

All the cuddling on the couch was for his family, showing to them that you two were a couple. Amelia being the only one to catch on that you weren’t. Well, at least you hoped she was the only one for both of your sakes. You heard a soft murmur behind you, breaking your train of thought. 

Bradley shifted closer to you, nuzzling his face into your back while pulling your midsection back. That was when you felt it. A heat crept into your cheeks, something sparking inside of you. A small rock of Bradley hips almost had a moan slipping from your lips. Your hand trailed up to your lips, covering your mouth to hide any sounds you might produce. 

Soft sounds emanated from Bradley, your thighs squeezing together as you listened. A loop of excuses kept playing in your brain, telling you that what was happening was wrong but you couldn’t stop your thighs from tightening. It took everything inside of you not to rock back into him, for your and his sanity. But it wasn’t much longer before Bradley was stirring awake. A soft ‘hmm’ was all you heard, his arm loosening around you, then there was a light scramble. 

“Oh my god.” That’s when you decided to put the intro to acting class to work. You played dumb, acting like you were asleep. After letting out a sleep noise, one you knew Bradley wouldn’t decipher, you rolled onto your back to look at him. You squint your eyes, putting on your best sleepy face. 

“What?” Bradley sat up and scooted away from you, a small pang of hurt in your chest. A sheen of sweat coated his face, a rosy tint to his cheeks. His eyes met yours for a moment, only to be broken by him. Bradley threw the blankets off of him, scooting down to the end of the bed. This was not the reaction you were expecting. 

“Bradley?” He stopped, hand resting on the door handle. 

“I’ll be back.” Panic flooded through you as he left. Thoughts of your friendship being now ruined were playing on repeat. You knew Bradley was going to come back into the bedroom and tell you to leave, that he would book a flight home for you. There was no doubt about it. You just let your best friend rut against your ass, and didn’t stop it. Of course, your friendship would be ruined. 

But it didn’t seem that way. Bradley had come back to the room, asking if he woke you and promptly apologizing. Then the day went on as normal, or what had become the normal for the both of you. 

The two of you were laying out on the couch, Amelia hidden in her room, Mav sitting in the living room with you. Pete and Bradley were watching River Monsters on the TV, the size of the fish casually catching your attention every now and then. Your phone was mainly holding your attention as you rested your head on Bradley’s thigh. Every now and then he would peer down at you, raising his eyebrows with a light expression on his face. You couldn’t make out what it really meant, but you knew it wasn’t anything bad. 

You looked back at your phone as the British man on the TV screen talked about the fish he was set after. That’s when a text notification flashed across the top of your screen. One from the group chat. 

Dagger Squad, Jakey: tongiht fuckers

Dagger Squad, Javs: are you drunk already? 

Dagger Squad, Reuben: Where? 

Dagger Squad, Nat: Jake, you better not be 

Dagger Squad, Jakey: one typo and everyone thinks you’re drunk

Dagger Squad, Jakey: i’m at work assholes

Dagger Squad, Jakey: except you Reuben, you’re not an asshole 

Dagger Squad, Reuben: Thanks. 

A chuckle left you, the sling of texts getting the better of you. Bradley noticed your laugh, giving you a questioning look. An amused huff left Bradley after you offered your phone to him. 

“How could we not? He was notorious for showing up to 8am’s still drunk or hungover.” That caught Mav’s attention, him perking up like a puppy. 

“Seresin?” Bradley nodded to Mav, you turning to look at Mav. It didn’t really surprise you that Mav knew of Jake. It surprised you that he knew what his tendencies were. “Wild kid.” Bradley let out a hearty laugh. 

“That’s what you call it? Come on Mav, I’ve heard you call him much worse.” Mav smiled, a small nod barely noticeable. Bradley had told Mav all about Jake in college, the goods and bads. 

“That’s what I’ll leave it at. Don’t want to say anything that gets me in trouble.” 

“Like how he has an ego that could rival the size of Jupiter?” Mav caught your smirk, your words pulling a chuckle from him. 

“Something like that.” It was true. Jake had a huge ego, it was apparent from the first moment you met him. He had just this aura about him that screamed ‘asshole with confidence’, even if the first part wasn’t fully true. Yes, he was an ass a lot of the time, but he did care deeply for all of you. 

“Are you two going out tonight? With Jake?” Bradley’s lips bunched to one side of his mouth. 

“Guess so.” 

For a Tuesday night the bar was packed. Even though Natasha had argued for Midland Street bar hopping, everyone decided Frick’s was probably the better choice. They weren’t the spry young college kids they used to be. The idea of walking from bar to bar while stumbling wasn’t appealing to you, especially in the fifteen degree weather. Plus, the thirty minute drive to Frick’s was better than the forty-five to Midland Street. 

Jake lightened up the minute he saw you and Bradley walk in. Jake stopped you for a moment, making you turn to show off your outfit. It wasn’t anything crazy, jeans and a cropped knit sweater. Natasha greeted Bradley immediately. Your face scrunched a little when Natasha pulled Bradley down, whispering something to him. The lighting wasn’t the best, but there was no mistaking the blush that crept up his neck. 

“You two fuck yet?” Jake’s comment pulled you from your stare. You slapped his chest with the back of your hand, giving him a scowl. 

“Jake, this is why nobody tells you anything.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, walking towards the table. 

“People tell me things.” You rolled your eyes, grabbing the wrist of his hand that was dangling off your shoulder. 

“Javy doesn’t count.” Jake feigned a hurt look at your teasing.

“But Javy is people.” You squeezed his wrist, chuckling at his joke. Javy appeared from the bathroom, reminding you of his rule to empty his bladder before drinking. Bradley and Natasha sat down across the table from you. This had to be the first time for the entire trip that Bradley wasn’t sitting next to you. There was a small ache in your chest, watching him scoot closer to the table across from you. Jake sitting next to you was fine, but it just wasn’t Bradley.

“Is Robert coming?” Jake asked. 

“Yeah, Bob is coming.” You replied, seeing Natasha give a confirming nod. 

“Mickey?” Another nod from Nat. “Good, getting those two to reply is like pulling teeth. Reuben even replies faster than them, and he never replies.” You rolled your eyes at Jake’s comment. Group chats weren’t Bob, Mickey, or Reuben’s thing. Hell, Bradley barely responded in the group chat either. 

“What do I never do?” All of you turned to see Reuben, a long wool peacoat and scarf adorning him. That was one thing Reuben was always good at, dressing exceptionally well. You almost jumped out of your chair, hurrying around the table to hug him. It had been years since you saw Reuben. He wasn’t the best at keeping up with people, living in his own realm of existence. You were a little jealous of it, but it did supply you for satisfying reunions. 

“Aye, and Payback is here!” Jake announced, getting out of his own chair to get a hug from Reuben. Reuben rolled his eyes at Jake’s nickname, one that he earned at university for always getting payback on Jake. Jake and Mickey were always trying to pull pranks on Reuben, trying to rile him up. To which Reuben reciprocated, pranking them in ten fold. 

Reuben took his seat at the end of the table, knowing the free seat on your left was meant for Bob. There was a matching open seat across from it, free for Mickey. 

“Yes, Mickey is coming. Class was running a bit late for him.” Sometimes you forgot that Mickey was a teacher. Not just a teacher, a professor. A professor of fine art to be precise. He taught at one of the local community colleges and recreation centers, teaching a few different types of art classes. 

“You got an excuse for Bob?” Jake asked, earning an eye roll from Javy. 

“Dude, this is the first time we’ve all seen each other in years. Why you being like this?” Javy questioned. You and everyone agreed, joining in on scorning Jake for his questioning manner. 

“Excuse me for wanting to know when my friend gets here.” His hands moved up in a defensive manner. That was when the waitress came by, taking drink orders and checking everyone’s ID. Bradley was oddly quiet, making you wonder what was going on in his brain. What had Natasha whispered to him? He wasn’t nervous the entire thirty minute car ride, so why now? 

About ten minutes passed before Bob and Mickey showed up, the both of them getting there at the same time. Bob quickly took his place next to you, Mickey sitting across from him. They both gave you these looks, ones that nobody else picked up on. They knew. They knew what had happened that morning. 

A new group chat had been formed that morning. One of just the three of you. It started initially as a ‘I need to tell Mickey and Bob that Bradley was just dry humping me in his sleep and I didn’t do anything about it’ that turned into a ‘I think I might be in love with Bradley’. Bob and Mickey weren’t surprised by either thoughts. But now you were sitting at a table with them, the temptation of teasing you right in front of them. There was a small tension, one Reuben immediately picked up on.

“So.. how’s everyone been?” Reuben asked, wanting to keep the topic off the obvious. If Mickey knew anything, Reuben knew it too. Their connection started when they were roommates, only strengthening over time. 

“Good! Kids are good too!” Javy didn’t have kids, he had students. He treated them as if they were his own, doting on all of them with an equal amount of care. 

“Still don’t know how you put up with them.” Natasha said, sipping on her gin and tonic. Bradley smiled, agreeing with a nod. 

“Well, I don’t get how you can stare at numbers all day.” Javy teased, sticking his tongue out at her. 

“It’s not that hard.” Jake chimed in. Now it was your turn to join in the conversation. 

“Says the engineer.” Jake rolled his eyes. 

“What can I say,” Jake shrugged, “I’m special.” Jake grabbed his beer bottle for a long swig. 

“If that’s what you want to call it.” Bradley said, earning giggles from everyone around the table. 

That was how the night went. All of you catching up, discussing life and things you all had planned. The topic of what you and Bradley were editing came up, Reuben curious about what new books might hit the market soon. Bob had mentioned that he was doing something computer related, not wanting to explain and potentially confuse everyone. Apparently the private accounting business Natasha started earlier that year was booming; something you never thought could describe accounting. 

Bradley’s gaze would occasionally fall on you throughout the night. While at the table they would flick from your eyes to your lips, every now and then settling on the exposed skin of your neck. His looks only became more frequent after a round of shots. That hazel gaze raking over your body once you all moved to the pool table. It only got worse when you would lean over to take your shot.

That morning had been a confirmation for Bradley, confirming his own feelings for you. It wasn’t a sudden thing, feelings he had been thinking about for a few weeks now. He was hoping this trip would just confirm you being his best friend. But that was not what happened. Every time he looked at you his heart swelled, constantly fighting the urge to press his lips to yours. Not to mention he was waking up almost every morning with a hard on because of dream you. So watching you bend over against the pool table, wiggle your hips slightly before taking your shot was painful. What was even more painful when a guy approached you at the bar. 

You didn’t really remember when you finished off your last drink, or what drink you were even on. You finished the game of pool you were playing before getting a new one. Bradley had told you during the car ride there that he would only have one beer. Which he had already had, not that you were keeping count. You did count that he was on glass three of water though. 

The bar wasn’t too crowded, just a handful of older men hanging out while having some type of whiskey you assumed. The bartender took your drink order, cracking the redbull for it and reaching for the cherry vodka. That was when someone creeped up beside you, waving at the bartender for the next order. An uncomfortable feeling settled over you, feeling a pair of eyes on you. A pair of unfamiliar eyes. 

“Hey.” You looked at the guy next to you, awkwardly smiling and acknowledging him with a nod. You didn’t say anything though, hoping he would leave you be. “You look good.” That made your eyebrows knit together. 

“Sorry, do I know you?” 

“No, but I’d like to get to know you.” You could smell the alcohol on his breath, a grimace coursing through your body. 

“No.” It was a simple word, one you figured would get the point across. 

“Come on sweets, can’t yo-” 

“She said no.” That familiar gruff voice was behind you. You weren’t sure when Bradley had appeared behind you, but you were more than happy about it.

“And who are you, buddy?” That question sparked something in Bradley, his nostrils flaring. Warmth wrapped around your waist, Bradley’s arm tugging you close to him.

“Boyfriend, now get the fuck out of here. She’s taken.” A shiver ran down your spine, a heat pooling between your thighs. Fuck, why did that make you so hot? It had to be the alcohol, not the fact Bradley was calling you his. Your hand rested against his chest, leaning into him to further his words into the stranger's brain. After the stranger left, you grabbed your drink from the bar. The warmth of Bradley’s arm never left you, even when you two walked towards the group. 

It felt like you were vibrating when everyone saw you again. Everyone had giant smirks on their faces, Bob, Reuben, and Mickey whispering between each other. Jake’s smirk was shit-eating, full of a smugness you had shockingly never seen from him before. Javy nudged Nat with his elbow, both of their smirks were full of affection. 

“Some asshole at the bar wouldn’t leave her alone.” Bradley stated when you two returned, the warmth of his arm disappeared. For the rest of the time Bradley fetched all of your drinks, from cider to shots. He was currently at the bar for a round of shots for you, Bob, Mickey, and Reuben. 

“You two make quite the pair,” Reuben took a swig of his beer, “always have if I’m being honest.” 

“And after this morning?” A heat filled you at Mickey’s words, a mix of the alcohol and embarrassment. 

“Can we not talk about that?” Bob let out a chuckle.

“What? Worried he will find you were awake the whole time?” 

“Oh, don’t act like a fucking saint Bob. We all know the shit you got up to in college.” Reuben and Mickey laughed, Bob’s eyebrows knitted together. 

“No idea what you’re talking about.” An eye roll was all you gave him. 

“So when do you two fly back?” Mickey asked. None of you noticed Bradley reappear, two shots in each hand. A part of you had forgotten that bartending is what he did to help pay his way through college. 

“December thirty-first.” Bradley answered, setting the shots all down on the table. You passed him the water you had been guarding for him. The four of you with shots toasted, Bradley toasting his water cup to you all. The liquor burned as it traveled down your throat. You weren’t completely drunk, but there was definitely a thick haze wrapped around your mind. 

“Just in time for New Years.” Reuben said, leaning back and wrapping his arm behind Mickey’s chair. A small staring contest had started between you and Bob, his blue eyes intense with knowing. 

“Guess so.” A part of you knew Reuben’s words meant more than the obvious, but the last shot was already starting to catch up to you. The haze only got worse as the night went on. Natasha was fucking with Bradley at the dart board, teasing him after every shot. Jake, Javy, Mickey, and Reuben were all playing pool; teams of two which weren’t uncommon for them. Bob sat with you at the table, taking immediate notice to your zoning stare. 

“Hey, hey.” Bob waved his hand, breaking your trance and grabbing your attention. The haze in your brain was more intense than you initially thought. A small smile was what you offered him. Bob let out a sigh. 

“How you feelin’?”  He adjusted his glasses. The chatter from the rest of the bar was mind numbing, starting to overwhelm your brain. A nausea started to settle in your stomach, bubbling into your throat. Your hands ran over your face, everything becoming too much all at once. The sounds. Your friends. The trip. Bradley.

After your hands loosened from your face your eyes caught him. His mustache twitching upwards as he held Natasha’s final dart high and out of reach. It was the same look you had watched him give Amelia during your snowball fight. Something feisty but full of warmth and care. Similar to what a big brother would give his sister. It made you think about all the looks that Bradley had given you over the trip. 

They were nothing like the looks Amelia and Natasha got. Every time you had caught him looking at you there was a softness to his gaze. A type of adoration laced into it. It made you think if his look for you had always been like that. Not the goofy caring older brother look, but the one you only gave to lovers. The look that told you he would be there through thick and thin, never leaving your side when you needed him the most. 

Everything was starting to make your head spin. Bob had concern written all over his face now. Your delayed response was really starting to stress him out. 

“Water. Fresh air. I need it all.” Bob nodded, watching you start to struggle with getting your coat on. After that he wrapped an arm around your midsection, keeping you steady against his body. The two of you made it to the bar, getting a glass of water before heading outside. Bob held the glass of water until you two were outside, sitting on the smokers bench outside. 

It didn’t surprise you that nobody was out here, it was fucking freezing. But the cold was refreshing, keeping the liquid fire coursing through your body at bay. Bob handed you the glass of water, watching as you took small sips. He ran a hand through his hair, adjusting his glasses briefly. A silence settled between the two of you, both of you watching each visible exhale. 

“Why.” Bob looked at you, not sure whether you were actually asking a question or not. 

“Why what?” The water in your glass was comforting, slightly warmer than the air surrounding you two. 

“You know.” You turned your head a little, looking towards Bob. He did the same, giving you a melancholic look. “Feelings suck.” Bob let out a small huff, one that sounded amused. 

“It's not a bad thing, liking him.” His friendly smile returned. 

“I’m afraid it might be the ‘L’ word though.” You confessed. 

“Lesbians?” You gave him a playful swat, almost spilling your water in the process. You were impressed that he would quote Scott Pilgrim at a time like this. “I know,” he clarified, “and I think you do. Maybe you have for a while.” 

It was probably true. You had only thought of him as a friend for so long, it was hard to find the exact point you realized you cared for him more than that. All those late nights at the office and editing manuscripts together were starting to feel different. You wanted to say your feelings didn’t start til you were here, but that would be a lie. The double proof reads he offered you on manuscripts, the cups of coffee when you didn’t ask, even the way he lied about you being his girlfriend. It was all muddy and confusing, but it made you warm inside. 

“Bob,” it was barely a whisper, “I don’t know what to do.” Tears pricked at your waterline, a frown forming on your lips. Bob wrapped an arm around you, letting you rest your head against his  shoulder. He felt bad for you. It wasn’t because of the circumstances, it was because he knew that you truly didn’t know what to do. 

“I think you should get some sleep, then figure out what to do.” You nodded, the material of his carhartt coat rough on your cheek. “Don’t worry, you’ll figure it out.” 

Bob placed a kiss on the top of your head. He sat with you until you finished your glass of water. It was perfect timing really. Bob decided to go find Bradley, only for Bradley to walk outside in a slight panic. Relief flooded over him when he saw you with Bob, worried the asshole from earlier might have come back to find you. 

Getting into the car was a bit of a challenge. Alcohol always made it harder to use your legs, balance becoming difficult. Bradley helped you though, Bob awkwardly standing to the side. Bob didn’t want to leave until he knew you were good. Bradley finished buckling up your seatbelt, closing the door before talking to Bob.

“Thanks man, I got really worried when I couldn’t find her.” Bob nodded, patting Bradley on the shoulder. 

“Bradley,” Bob paused for a moment, “take good care of her. Nat’s told me, and I just, don’t hurt her.” Bradley nodded softly, not fully sure how to respond to Bob. 

“Well, I don’t even kn-”

“She does. Trust me, she does.” Bob said. He patted Bradley’s shoulder one more time before heading back towards the bar. 

Bradley slipped inside the car, looking over at your already sleeping form. A soft smile formed on his lips as he admired you. You looked so peaceful while drunk and asleep. He let out a sigh, chuckling quietly to himself. You made his heart ache in ways he never thought it could. Everything about you he adored, it had only taken some time for him to realize it. He twisted the ignition, figuring it was time to finally head home. 

Bradley kept a watchful eye over you the entire ride home, checking periodically to see if you were waking up or not. But you never did, not until the final stop in the driveway. Even then it took a few minutes for you to stir. Bradley didn't mind that though, being able to admire you for a few more minutes.

"Are we home?" A sleepy haze was still casted over you, eyes not fully open and words raspy.You turned inward, on your side a little bit as you stared at him. It looked as though you were fighting to stay awake. 

"Yeah." Bradley wished you would have slept a little longer, anything to prevent him from not being next to you. He turned towards you, watching as you leaned deeper into the seat of the car.

"I'm tired." Your voice was barely above a whisper.

"I know," Bradley smiled, "you slept the whole way here." You ran a hand over your face, yawning afterwards and closing your eyes. "How do you feel?" You shrugged. 

"Just sleepy." You had never wanted to sleep in the passenger seat more than in that moment. 

"Hey, hey, babe. Let's get inside, then you can sleep in a big warm bed, okay?" Bradley started to panic, thinking you had already fallen back asleep. The sleepy flutter of your eye lashes informed him otherwise. You nodded, unbuckling your seat belt and sitting up a little bit. Bradley watched you closely, unbuckling his own seat belt. “You good? Gonna throw up or anything?” 

“No.” Another borderline whisper. Even though there was a thick mixture of sleep and alcohol coating your brain, it hung onto that one word. Babe. Bradley exiting the car and coming around to your side didn’t even register on your radar. Suddenly your door was opening, Bradley with a big warm smile staring at you. Why was he being like this? There was no one around to watch this fake arrangement currently, so why? 

“Come on, babe. We gotta get you inside.” There it was again. Bradley wrapped an arm under your armpits, you placing one around his shoulders. It was awkward, him being taller than you, but you two made it work. 

The two of you made your way slowly up the small driveway, to the steps leading to the door. Bradley quickly unlocked it, still holding onto you so you wouldn’t fall. It was like your legs were jello, barely supporting your weight without his help. You caught yourself onto the small bench in the foyer-like room, slumping back against the wall. Your eyes were trained on Bradley as he closed and locked the door. 

“Haven’t been this drunk in awhile, huh?” He asked, taking his coat off and hanging it up. Slow-motion had taken over your brain, slowing your movements. You had never realized how hard it was to unzip a coat until that moment. Bradley watched you struggle for a moment, finding your struggle with the zipper a little adorable. He hadn’t seen you this drunk since college. 

“Here, let me help you, babe.” That time something clicked in your brain. You let him take over on unzipping your coat, only for a jumbled question to exit you. 

“Why.. Why do you keep sayin’ it?” Bradley’s face scrunched together. He was now kneeling in front of you, taking your boots off because he knew that’d be a task you couldn’t handle. At least in your current state. 

“Keep saying what?” Bradley helped you up, holding you close to him until you were stable. 

“There’s no one around.” He shook his head, still confused. He led you into the kitchen, headed towards the stairs. You tripped a little up the stairs, Bradley shifted your weight more onto him for the trip up the stairs. 

“I’m still not sure what you’re talking about.” Bradley said, the two of you stumbling towards the bedroom. The wood floor under your feet felt slick, balance evading you due to the feeling. Just before getting to the bedroom, the slick sensation had you tumbling towards the wall. Bradley caught you from falling completely, pressing you into the wall with his body. The weight of his body on yours had your mind spinning. It was the first time you had fully opened your eyes since getting home. The mixture coating your brain was immediately gone, clarity appearing out of thin air. 

Bradley’s eyes flicked down to your slightly parted lips. He wanted to kiss you so badly. It was like his mouth was salivating with need. His hazel eyes flicked back up to yours, taking in your wide eyes. Guilt immediately flooded over him, reminding himself of your current state and how this might come off.

“I- I’m just trying to hold you up.” Bradley stammered, pulling his body away from yours. 

“I know.” 

“I just don’t want you to think I’m trying to take advantage of you or anything.” Bradley suddenly felt nervousness bubble in his chest. 

“Bradley,” you let out a long breath, “you keep calling me babe. Why? Nobody is around for the charade, so why?” You gestured to the empty hallway, emphasizing the nobody being there part of your sentence. 

Bradley’s face scrunched together. He hadn’t noticed himself calling you babe, but looking back he definitely did. In the car, getting you out of the car, taking your boots off. He called you babe each time. He knew why, but he was now nervous to tell you. 

“Habit.” He whispered. That whisper caught your attention. You narrowed your eyes at him, one of your hands creeping up to touch the black t-shirt under his flannel. The words were on the tip of your tongue, threatening to spill out. I love you. But instead your hand balled into a fist, pulling on the fabric of the shirt. You pushed off the wall, letting go of his shirt. 

“Of course it was.” You said. Bradley raised an eyebrow, not sure what your response really meant. He remained silent though as you started walking towards the bedroom, one hand out against the wall for support. He stayed in the hallway for a moment, cursing himself for not just telling you the truth. He wanted you to be sober for that though, wanted to know you’d remember it. He knew you weren’t black out, but he didn’t want you to write it off as your imagination. 

When he walked into the bedroom you were practically nude. Your sweater was off, jeans on the floor, currently struggling to get your bra off. Bradley quickly placed his hands on your hips, steadying you when you almost fell over. A gasp passed your lips, his searing hot hands on your skin. Bradley tried not to focus on the sensation of your panties barely touching the edge of his hands. His hands ghosted over your skin, finding their way to the clip of your bra. Your hands moved to the front of your chest, holding your breasts. 

“Let me help you,” Bradley let out a shaky breath, “before you hurt yourself.” You nodded, feeling the strap of your bra loosen. Bradley quickly found your sleep shirt, standing behind you once more. You let your bra fall, covering your chest with your hands still. Bradley got the shirt over your head, moving the collar of it down around your neck. You grabbed at the hem of the shirt, pulling it down around your body and putting your arms through the short sleeves. 

Then Bradley found your sweat pants. He kneeled down in front of you, his face level with your panties now. It took everything in Bradley not to press a kiss to your hip. Instead he guided each pant leg around your ankles, you putting a steady hand on his shoulder. Bradley was sure that his skin was going to have a mark, the warmth of your touch branding him for good. Marking him as yours and only yours. Your hand stayed on his shoulder as he stood up, trailing to the nap of his neck. He held back a gasp when he felt your finger lightly play with his hair. 

This was the most intimate thing Bradley had ever experienced. Yeah, he had fucked people in the past, but this? Dressing his best friend that he also had feelings for? He wasn’t sure if he would ever experience anything like it ever again. It was so sweet and tender. Just like the look you were giving him. 

“Sleep with me.” You whispered. 

Bradley was a goner. 

He nodded, helping you into bed before changing into his own clothes. You watched him change, eyes wandering all over his body. He crawled in the bed behind you, arm moving around your midsection. He pulled you tight against him, his chest flush with your back. You hummed lightly, basking in the warmth you had grown to love over the past few days. 

Some remnants of alcohol were starting to affect you once again. Thoughts swirled in your brain, finally working up the courage. It wasn’t like you hadn’t told him it before, like when he brought you a surprise cup of coffee or paid for the late night take out. It would be different this time though. 

“I love you.” Bradley almost didn’t hear the borderline whisper, but he did. 

There was a pause, one that started to fill you with doubt and anxiety. A part of you wished to take it back. Wanting to have not fucked up your entire friendship. A hot breath appeared on your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. Bradley was leaning up towards your ear, wanting to make sure you heard every last word. 

“I love you, too.” 

-

Neither of you spoke about that night for the rest of the trip. There was a silent agreement established that night, Bradley sharing the bed with you. His makeshift bed was finally dismantled, and so did your denial of liking Bradley. After the drunken confession of your love, it was like a weight had been lifted off your chest. Bradley felt a similar sensation about saying it back. 

Penny and Pete both said you were more than welcome to come back. Amelia had mentioned she noticed something had changed between the two of you, but didn’t elaborate. So, you didn’t tell her what had changed. But you were sad to leave them, knowing that they were the ones inadvertently protecting you from conversation that needed to be had. 

But it never came. The entire car ride to the airport was almost a carbon copy of the previous drive. You got the GPS ready for Bradley then slept in the passenger seat. Bradley stole a few glances, trying to take as many mental pictures as possible. He was certain that whatever happened that night was a trip only occurrence. One he would never get the chance for ever again. 

The airport was almost empty, most people out celebrating for the New Years. Bradley told you that was the exact reason he booked the flight for New Years Eve. A forlorn feeling hung between the both of you. It felt like this was the end of the road. Neither of you had the courage to ask what was to happen now. You wanted to ask, ask if the two of you would be going back to occasional outings and late nights at the office. As much as you wanted to know, a part of you didn’t want to. If you knew, it would be final. 

Instead, you two only made small talk about the check in process. Casual jokes and borderline uncomfortable silences were exchanged before boarding. It was even worse on the plane. Bradley put his headphones in, flicking on a podcast to listen to while you curled up near the window. The rest of the flight was quick, the entire thing being only about two hours. The city that never slept had never felt more comforting when you got back. The drive from Queens to The Bronx was going to be long, the traffic of New Years in full swing. 

Music filled the space of the car, the two of you barely talking. The lights of the city teased you through the window. It was like they were poking and prodding your brain. Snowflakes hit the window and windshield, melting on impact from the warmth of the car. A dread filled the both of you as Bradley got closer to your apartment. It felt as though these bottled up emotions would stay as just that. Bottled up and left on a shelf in the back of your hearts. 

Even when Bradley pulled up to the curb, dropping you off, it was silent. Bradley stared straight forward, focused on the car parked in front of him. The sounds of your bags being pulled out of the car were clawing at his brain. They were the sound of his time running out. He could tell you at work on Tuesday, but maybe your feelings would be different by then. The closing on the backseat door pulled him out of his thoughts. You knocked on the window, gesturing for him to put it down. 

“Thank you.” You smiled warmly. “It was fun, meeting your family and seeing everyone. I’m glad I was able to help.” Your brain was screaming to say the three words, hoping he wouldn’t have forgotten the first time you said them. 

“Yeah, it was fun. Thanks for coming with and being my fake girlfriend.” Bradley wanted to kick himself as soon as he said it. He watched as your smile faded, giving him an affirming nod. 

“I’m gonna head up now. I’ll see you at work?” 

“Yeah, see you at work.” Bradley rolled the window up, watching you walk away. Your figure was altered by the droplets of melted snowflakes, making you seem more distant. Bradley felt a prickle at his waterline, knowing tears would be coming sooner or later. You opened the door for the stairway that led to your apartment, vanishing out of Bradley’s view. Bradley leaned back against the headrest, closing his eyes tightly. 

Tears threatened to pour down your cheeks the entire walk up the stairs. For once you hated that you lived on the third floor. Hated that it gave you so much time to think about the day. All of the never ending silence. It was clear that there was something broken between the two of you. The relationship strained or shattered. You quickly slotted the key into the door, knowing that once you were in your apartment you would be okay. It would mean you were safe. Safe to let out all of your emotions. 

But no tears fell once you crossed the threshold of your apartment. It was almost a numbing sensation instead. You slipped your coat off with ease, hanging it up by the door. The urge to put your suitcase and carry-on away disappeared. It wasn’t until you sat on the couch everything hit you. No sob wracked through you, only silent tears fell. The warm streaks heated your face, your lips turning into a small frown. 

A knock at your door had you wiping away the tears. You had no idea why someone would be knocking on your door this late. After getting to the door you checked the peephole, seeing a rather worked up looking Bradley. Confusion coursed through your body, not sure why he would be back. He let you go, what did he want now? You unlocked the door, opening it to see Bradley’s eyes widen. 

“Bradley, wha-” His hands cupped both sides of your face, smashing his lips against yours. You melted into the kiss, the hairs of his mustache lightly poking your upper lip. It was like something exploded inside of you, spurring you on to kiss him back. 

The two of you made it into your apartment, Bradley kicking the door closed with his foot. You tried trailing for his lips when he pulled back from yours. Even though your lungs were burning for air, you wanted to feel more of him. His forehead pressed lightly against your own, hazel eyes boring into your own. 

“I love you.” Hearing those three words from Bradley cracked the bottle, letting your emotions flow freely. 

“I love you too.” A tear fell from the corner of your eye. Bradley swiped it away, pressing his lips to yours once again. A river of passion flowed freely between the two of you. Your arms trailed up to wrap around his neck and shoulders; one of his hands ghosting down to your waist, the other cupping your jaw still. 

Teeth and tongue clashed while the two of you moved to the hallway of your apartment. The wall pressed into your back as Bradley pressed his hips into yours. A whine broke from you when you felt his semi-hard cock pressing into your hip. Wet kisses trailed down to your jaw and neck, the scratch of his mustache intoxicating. Bradley moaned against your skin when he felt you tug on the hair at the base of his head. 

“I’ve been wanting this all trip. Kissing you like this, having you pressed against me like this.” Bradley whispered into your ear, nipping at your earlobe. He pulled back to look at you, still cupping your jaw. His thumb softly rubbed your cheek, “I love you so much.”

“Why didn’t you kiss me that night?” The question passed your lips before you could stop it. Bradley nuzzled into the side of your neck, pressing soft searing kisses to your skin. 

“You were drunk.” Bradley slotted a leg between your thighs, rocking lightly to earn a moan from you. 

“Why not any other night?” Your words were breathy. 

“I didn’t know if you wanted it.” The hand on your jaw trailed down, cupping your breast over your knit sweater. Your hips bucked against his thigh, kisses trailing down your neck.

Both of his hands ghosted down to the bottom of your sweater, pulling it up over your body. Bradley marveled at the image before him. The person he had cared for for years looked so innocent before him. The soft pink bralette you wore enticed him, teasing him with what he could now have. It wasn’t until your arms pulled up to cover yourself slightly did his concern take over. 

A part of you felt nervous, finally having Bradley like this. Letting him see you so bare and vulnerable for him. It wasn’t his first time seeing you like this, a few college run ins and the instance during the trip. But this was different. You were offering your body up to him, trusting him to please you and care for every inch of you. It was subconscious when you shied away. 

“You do want this, right?” Bradley’s forefinger touched your chin, tilting your face. His hazel eyes were intoxicating and comforting. They let you know you were safe. You nodded. 

“I do, I want you.” Bradley pressed a soft kiss to your lips, mustache prickling your upper lip lightly. 

Strands of hair threaded through your fingers, you tugging softly to urge Bradley on.

Bradley picked up on it, hands ghosting down your sides to your hips. His tongue was soft on your lips, asking for permission to enter your mouth. His hips rocked into yours, you feeling his cock growing harder. Moans and whimpers fell from the both of you, rocking together while exploring each other's mouths. It felt like you were in high school again, the excitement of minimal contact vibrating through your body. 

Your fingers moved downward, trailing at the bottom of Bradley’s own sweater. He caught onto the hint, moving his torso back from yours to pull his sweater and t-shirt off. Rough yet soft fingers ghosted over the band of your bralette. The material felt almost as soft as your skin to Bradley, his cock twitching at the thought. His fingers trailed the material up to the strap that rested on your left shoulder. He eased it down, kissing at your shoulder and collarbone. 

“You’re so beautiful, so fucking beautiful.” The whisper on your skin sent goosebumps blossoming all over you. “I’ve been waiting so long for this.” Bradley’s fingers dipped below the band of your bralette, tugging up over your chest to expose your breasts. Your nipples were pert and eager for Bradley’s touch. 

One of your hands went to his hair, tugging as he took one of your breasts into his mouth. Your back arched off the wall, pushing your breast flush with his mouth. Gasps fell from your lips as his other hand came to your other breast, fingers pinching and playing with your other nipple. Bradley groaned against your tit, the vibrations traveling to your cunt. Your insides tightened, pleading you for more. 

“Bradley, please. I need more.” Bradley let your breast go from his mouth, pressing his hips tighter to yours. He rolled them, his cock rubbing at the apex of your thighs. 

“Tell me, Tell me you want me.” A red flush had grown up Bradley’s chest, adorning his neck and cheeks now. Your free hand trailed down his chest, the need to just touch him too great. 

“I want you to feel you,” the hand trailed up to his shoulder, “I want you to make love to me.” 

Bradley couldn’t hold back the groan that escaped him. He smashed his lips into yours, hands cupping your breasts before traveling lower. He made quick work of the button on your jeans, messily shifting your pants down your thighs. A small giggle bubbled out of you as you chased his lips, not wanting the kiss to end. 

He kneeled in front of you, easing your jeans off your legs. Small soft kisses littered the front of your thighs with the accompaniment of pricks from his mustache. Fingertips ghosted up the sides of your legs, gently guiding your panties down. The kisses traveled up your thighs to your hips, both of your hands diving into his hair. Two fingers ran through your folds, briefly touching that sensitive bundle of nerves. 

“Fuck, Bradley.” Bradley pressed his mouth to your folds, flicking his tongue between them. Your body lurched over him slightly, whining as his tongue ravished your clit. 

One of Bradley’s hands moved up to separate your folds, his tongue diving deeper between them. Small prickles of his mustache could be felt on your sensitive flesh, your fingers tightening in his hair at the feeling. The flicks of his tongue drove you crazy, a tense sensation in your abdomen forming. Your head fell back, moans pouring from your lips as Bradley continued his assault. 

“Your tongue feels so good.” It was barely above a whisper, laced with a moan as your hips started to push towards his face. 

Small ripples of pleasure coursed through you, adding to the imminent wave of pleasure that was about to crash over you. Bradley groaned against you, shaking his face back and forth on you. Bradley flattened his tongue, wiggling it back and forth across your clit. The motion was overwhelming, a shudder running through your body from it. You tried to pull him off of you, knowing if he kept it up you would be a goner. Bradley let you tug at his hair harshly, never budging from you. 

The wave of pleasure you had been anticipating crashed over you. Intense pleasure flooded your system, making it hard to think. All you could do was roll your hips against Bradley's tongue. Your hands kept him pulled tightly on you, mustache digging into your folds. Bradley didn't mind, the image of you unraveling on his face had his cock twitching in his jeans. The sounds falling from you were angelic to him. An endless mantra of his name with moans mixed in. 

"Brad-Bradley! Sto-stop!" Bradley finally pulled back, letting you get some much needed relief. There was a thin sheen to his mustache, the hallway light showing it at the right angles. 

"That was so hot." Bradley stood up, kissing you gingerly. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him in for an intense kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue, a small wetness prickling your upper lip. 

One of your hands trailed down his chest, earning a groan from him. Only the fabric of his jeans and boxers separated the two of you. His jean clad hips rolled into your bare ones. You cupped him through his jeans, reminding you of his size. With one hand you unbuttoned his jeans, pushing your hand into his boxers. Bradley pulled back, resting his forehead against yours while letting out a loud groan. 

"Fuck, babe, your hand feels so good." Feeling him praise you lightly sent a shudder through you, your insides clenching. 

His cock was warm and velvety in your hand, pulsing and twitching with each stroke. Bradley's head drifted to your shoulder, lips haphazardly kissing at the skin. Your touch was intoxicating, his brain going fuzzy as your strokes continued. A tightness in his abdomen had started to form. One of his hands grabbed your wrist, pulling it from the inside of his boxers. 

"As much as I'd love for you to continue, I need to be in you now." Bradley whispered against your skin. His words had you arching, nodding your head in agreement. 

The thought of his hard cock opening you up, stretching you until you couldn't take it had you moaning. Your tits were pressed tightly against his chest as your lips collided once more. You pulled back from the kiss, taking his hand and leading him down the hallway to your bedroom. He rid himself of his jeans and boxers as soon as he got to your room. Bradley had you on the bed quickly, hands groping and massaging your sides. His lips ghosted over your skin as he slotted himself between your legs. 

His cock rested against your folds, twitching every now and then. The two of you kissed, consuming everything the other had to offer. Bradley rolled his hips into yours. His cock pushed through your folds and rubbed against your clit. Your legs fell further apart, preparing yourself for the pleasure that was about to come. Bradley pulled back from you. Your eyes locked with his as he grabbed the base of his cock. 

The head of his cock prodded at your entrance. Bradley watched your lashes flutter while he pushed into you. A gasp falling from your lips as he continued. Your gaze never broke his those. He watched your face as you took all of him, filling you to the hilt. 

Once Bradley bottomed out, he started pressing kisses all over you. His hips were still as he littered you with kisses. Forehead, cheeks, neck, jaw, shoulders. All touched by the tender grace of his lips. Gentle roaming of his hands around your body kept you grounded in this reality. The two of you sat there for a few moments, him peppering your skin as your walls adjusted to his size. A kiss was pressed to your cheek before he pulled back to look down at you. 

“Hey.” The word was barely above a whisper, one hand moving up to caress your cheek. 

“Hey.” You whispered back, leaning up to kiss him. Bradley shifted his hips, pulling back a little before pushing back in. 

It was a soft rocking pace he created. His hips slowly rolled, his hands moving to hike your legs up around his waist. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, hand threading through his hair as he nuzzled into you. Moans and whimpers poured from the both of you, an occasional whisper of each other’s name. His pace picked up, hips moving slightly faster and harder.

“You feel so good,” Bradley groaned, “I don’t know how long I’ll last.” 

Every twitch of his cock you could feel. Your walls squeezed around him, earning a moan from the both of you. He slowed his thrusts for a moment, not wanting to come too soon. Bradley wanted this moment to last forever, even though he knew it wouldn’t. He stopped his thrusts completely, staying seated inside of you completely though. Bradley moved up to sit on his heels, looking down at you. 

His gaze raked over you, moaning when he saw his cock pressed into you. One of his hands settled between your breasts, trailing down to your hips. His thrusts picked back up, the new angle hitting that sensitive spot inside of you. Your walls were clenched tightly around him, the both of you letting your heads drop back. 

“If you do that one more time.” Bradley smirked as he looked down at you. You intentionally squeezed your walls around him, listening to the deep groan that emanated from his throat. 

“Or what?” You playfully joked. Bradley’s hands coasted down your legs, grabbing your hips tightly. 

“Or this.” Bradley almost pulled all the way out, his tip still inside of you. He rammed his hips forward, hitting that spot inside of you. Your back arched hard, an almost painful moan ripping from you. Bradley leaned back down over you, caging you in between his arms. 

“I love you.” Bradley whispered, kissing your neck and nibbling on your earlobe. 

“I love you, too.” Bradley kept up a softer pace, edging the both of you closer to your climaxes. 

It was one of the most intense orgasms you had ever experienced. All your muscles tensing as pleasure rocked through your body once more. Emotions flowed from you, Bradley’s name filling the space around the two of you. You carded your fingers through Bradley’s hair, letting him know you had him. Bradley’s hips were stuttering, whines falling from the both of you as he came inside of you. 

Hot breath beated against your neck as you two laid there. Bradley was still inside of you, laying on top of you as he regained his breath. You kept carding your fingers through his hair, almost a mindless action now. A shudder ran through you once Bradley shifted, propping himself up on his arm. His eyes were soft when he looked down at you. 

“Hmm?” You questioned. 

“Just looking at you.” Bradley said, leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. “Happy New Years.” 

“Happy New Years.”

A whimper left you as he pulled out of you. A slick feeling replaced the new empty one, his cum dripping out of you. Bradley quickly hopped off the bed, heading to your bathroom to find a washcloth. 

“I’m sorry, I should have pulled out.” Bradley apologized, handing the warm wet washcloth to you. You shrugged, taking it to clean yourself. 

“As long as you buy the plan B.” Bradley smiled, nodding as he sat on the bed near you. He chewed at his bottom lip, nervous about the impending conversation. He had already put everything out on the floor. It was hard to take back ‘i love you’ while your entire dick was in someone. But it wasn’t like you hadn’t shared the same sentiment. You picked up on his nervousness though, reaching a hand out to touch his thigh. 

You tossed the washcloth across the room, silently cheering when it made it into the basket. Bradley took notice, elbowing you softly. “Nice shot.” 

“Thanks.” You stared at him for a little bit, taking in all of his features before speaking. “So, this?” You gestured between the two of you then scooted up the bed. Bradley laid back on the bed, you propping yourself up on your elbow next to him. Even though he was nervous, all he could think about was that you looked like an angel. 

“I love you,” Bradley started, “but more than a friend.” 

“Obviously, you goof.” You tried to keep a straight face, only to smile at him. “I love you, too. The trip really helped me see it.” Bradley nodded. 

“I knew before the trip. Well, for me, I did. Why else would you think I’d buy you so much coffee?” You lightly smacked his chest, his hand catching your hand. 

“I don’t know, maybe ‘cause you’re a good person.” You sat up, “I gotta pee.” 

“I am a nice person!” Bradley shouted as you took off for the bathroom. He got up, finding his boxers and slipping them on. 

He had been to your apartment many times, but only in your bedroom a few times. It was very you he noticed, now having the time to take it all in. There was a cork board on one wall. It was littered with pictures, ones from college and a few from the past few years. There was one specific one that stood out to him though. It was of the two of you, on that neither of you had taken. He had an arm wrapped around your shoulders as the two of you looked at one another. Must have been from an office party. It made him wonder if the two of you always looked like a couple to everyone. 

“What?” Bradley looked at you, taking in your new clothed form. It was only a baggy t-shirt and underwear, but god did he find it beautiful. 

“Just looking at these pictures. Wondering if we always looked this good together?” You bumped your shoulder into his arm playfully, looking at the same picture. 

“What are you implying?” You knew the answer, surely you did. Bradley turned to you, cupping your face with one of his hands. 

“I’m implying that I’d like to be in a relationship with you.” A flutter appeared in your chest when he pressed his forehead to yours. 

“I think I’d like that, too.”

[f1haaland]

Hello, first, I love you Fernando Alonso imagine, second, could you do a Fernando one where it's your birthday and have no race during the week and takes advantage of this to spoil you during the week and ends with having sex on his yacht after a candlelight dinner

𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 / 𝑭𝑨𝟏𝟒

pairing: sugar daddy!fernando alonso x fem!reader

word count: 1.4k

author's note: i wasn't going to write this one now bc i have a couple of requests to write still, but it's my birthday week so it felt appropriate. happy birthday to me!

warnings: significant age gap (reader is 23, fernando is 41), pure filth, no plot just sex, unprotected sex btw, oral sex (female receiving), p in v, boat sex i guess but not really, NOT MEANT FOR MINORS

reblogs, feedbacks and likes are appreciated. support your content creators!! 🫶🏽

➜ 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚 𝟏 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

this is a spin-off to this oneshot

· ┈┈┈┈┈┈ · ༓  ༓ · ┈┈┈┈┈┈ ·

After 1 year together, things were working out amazing for you and Fernando. Surprisingly, not many people were judging your relationship, and the internet considered you his "controversial young girlfriend".

Your studies were doing great, your relationship couldn't be better, and you were living the life of your dreams.

Fernando had brought you to Monaco with him to celebrate your 23rd birthday. Of course, he had a home there, but you optioned to spend your special night with him on his brand-new yacht.

You had made him one simple request to him: "Do not buy me gifts." Fernando didn't took that very well, offended that he couldn't spoil the love of his life, but he did as you ordered. He had already planned a dinner for tonight, and in the morning you woke up to lots of different flowers in your room. He gets you new stuff all the time. You thought you don't an extra expensive souvenir just because you became a year older.

You wore a red dress and a ponytail, simple but chic, and just the way he liked. There wasn't a need to dress up for something made just for the two of you, but he enjoyed it when you made an effort to look nice just for him.

Blindfolded, he took you to the dock, where he had set a table dinner to candlelight for you. The dinner wasn't a surprise of course, but he had set the table all for himself just for you.

Dinner was going great, until...

"Shit!" You got startled by the loud sounds of explosions.

You turned your head to look behind you, as fireworks painted the skies in your favorite colors. You watched as hundreds of lights in drones flew over the sea, forming in different designs until they turned into the shape of a heart with your initials next to it. Fernando admired your surprised face with a huge grin on his own.

"Wait... is this for me?" You gasped at the realization, "Nano, you did this for me?"

"Everything I do is for you, mi amor" Fernando declared.

That was the biggest love gesture he has ever done for you. The first letter of your name was so big and bright in the sky you could bet the whole Monaco could see it. You hoped they could see just how much your man loved and worshiped you.

You never felt so turned on in your whole life.

You immediately forgot about the candlelight dinner. You got up and jumped in his lap. Fernando's hands gripped on your waist with his life, as your tongue battled with his in a wet and messy kiss. You bit his bottom lip and pulled between your teeth, making him groan hoarsely.

You worked your hips on top of his lap, moving forward and backwards, feeling his excitement start to grow beneath you. His palms slid down through your form until they reached your ass, grabbing it with such strength.

Fernando murmured against your skin, "What has gotten into you, corazón?"

He stood up, holding you to him. It didn't take long until you felt your body being tossed to the deck sofa.

"Don't ask, just fuck me" You begged, breathlessly.

You could have taken your dress, but the eagerness to be fucked screamed louder.

Fernando helped you out of your panties, opening your legs wide open so he could get a perfect view of your glistening wet cunt. His digits slightly brushed over it, teasing you. He planted sensual kisses all over your neck until he found an extra sensitive zone behind your ear lobe and focused on it. You gasped and whined helplessly.

"Look at you, so wet for me..." He taunted, leaving gentle bites on the curve of your neck.

You moaned as your small hand worked on top of the growing bulge inside his trousers. His shorts felt impossibly tight, and uncomfortably moist where the head of his cock was leaking.

Fernando proceeded to spread your slick arousal over your sensitive clit and rub you from side to side. You felt his erection get harder and harder under your palm. It was soon rock hard, but he didn’t seem to lose his composure. You, on the other hand, were a wreck.

His fingers were the most experienced you had ever had before. Even your own touch couldn’t compare.

"Is this what the birthday girl wants?" Fernando kissed your ear, drawing out a pleasured moan from you, "Beg me to fuck you, princess"

"Please nano, please" You tried to stifle your moaning when his knuckles disappeared into you.

He mocked, "Aren't you the cutest?"

Fernando got onto his knees in front of you, hiking up your dress to your stomach.

"Let me taste how desperate you are"

He didn't let you have time to process the sudden change of position, Fernando's mouth now worked where once his fingers were buried. Your fingers gripped his scalp, desperately needing to touch him. He brushed his thumb over your clit, circling that little bundle of nerves until you became a whimpering mess for him.

You tried to keep your moans and purring quiet. It was no easy task considering how damn good his wet tongue felt, moving in different ways on your warm core.

"Ah-ah, don't silence yourself, princesa. I want to hear your pretty noises." He taunted, flicking his tongue over your clit just to watch you squirm, "C'mon, be a good girl and do it again."

His voice sounding stern and seductive sent you into bliss, and erotic moans ripped your throat open just because he asked you to. Because just like the other way around, you'd do anything for him.

"Fuck, I'm so close!" You whispered out loud.

You bucked your hips towards him, fucking yourself on his finger and mouth. His hands held yours steady on your stomach, under the silky red fabric of your dress.

He slowed to a stop and removed his pleasurable fingers. You whined.

"Fernan–"

Hopping on top of you, Fernando grabbed your face between his hand and attacked your lips, silencing you with his own. He got in between your legs, and you felt something hard and velvety against your slit. Your heart pounded with the quick realization that it was his cock.

He rubbed his cockhead against your gushing slit while he whispered in your ear, "Make a wish, birthday girl"

"Fuck me, please"

He slowly thrust inside you, letting you savor every second of the pleasurable intrusion. You gasped. He filled you so perfectly.

Fernando groaned as he felt his dick ripping your walls open.

"Fuck, Nando!" You bit your lip hard, eyes turning to the back of your head.

You felt his hard length rubbing against every pleasurable spot inside you. The very walls of your pussy were alight with your once again approaching orgasm in a way you had never experienced before. Usually, it had to be your clit bringing you this much pleasure. This was even better.

"Fuck, you feel so good" He groaned against the crook of your neck, "like this pussy was made jus' for me. You were made jus' for me."

He growled with excitement and forcibly held your hands down on either side of your head, palms glued to each other, fingers entwined to his own. Even for his age, his stamina was relentless. You kept moaning and begging, and although you were incapable of any coherent thoughts, you kept eye contact, staring deep into those brown chocolate eyes that you so loved.

"Yes, sweetie, jus' like that. You're such a good girl" He murmured, his praisings driving you insane, "Come on my cock, love. Let it out for me."

Fernando's cock kept punching into you just right, reaching a fiery spot deep inside you. Your mind went blank. You felt a sweet, mind-blowing release spilling over. Your pussy simply gushed around him. His cock twitched inside you. A moment later he was moaning loudly in your ear. He thrust his cock a few more slow, firm times as you felt him come undone deep inside you.

He held himself deep but still inside you for a moment while he caught his breath. You were even more breathless than he was. Your every muscle relaxed into the sofa. You smiled like you couldn't help it.

Fernando kissed your ear. "Happy birthday, corazón."

liked by fernandoalo_official and 721,908 others

yourusername birthday dump. feeling 23.

[rylie-m]

redemption

Summary: In which Y/N Thomas is left to raise her and Rafe Cameron’s baby after he refuses to take responsibility for it. He shows up after two years, ready to redeem himself, but is it too late?

Chapter 1:

5 years ago - September 2nd

“Are you by any chance from the Outer Banks?” you ask the boy sitting next to you in your freshman year English class. “I am, why?” He states, with a very charming smile. “You look familiar. Do you know Topper Thornton?” He nods and chuckles slightly, “I do.” “Topper’s my cousin,” you smile softly at the thought of the younger boy who you loved like a little brother. “Yeah?” He asks, “Where are you from?” You smile and flip to a page in your notebook, “Charleston, but I’ve visited the Outer Banks a lot to see Topper and the rest of my family.” 

5 years ago - September 5th

The party you’re at is already packed, the smell of weed and alcohol is in the air, and the noise is enough to give you a headache already. As you and your friend, Ella, start to walk up the stairs to the frat house  you hear, “Hey! Y/N, right?” 

It’s Rafe. 

Unfortunately (for you) charming, extremely put together, and just bad enough to get you in trouble. That’s how Ella described him when you asked about him. And that’s the impression you got from his instagram. 

“Yeah, you’re Rafe, right?” He smirks and nods while walking over to you, abandoning his friends. Ella sighs behind you and shakes her head subtly. “Hi Ella,” Rafe smiles, obnoxiously. “Hey, Cameron.”  Ella gives Rafe an unimpressed look, “Y/N and I are busy. Good to see you.” She grabs your arm and drags you into the frat house, looking for her boyfriend. 

4 years ago - October 1st 

Ella finally picks up the phone and you immediately squeal into it. “Rafe asked me out! Finally!” You giggle and you hear Ella chuckle softly on the other side of the phone, “Took him long enough, I’m happy for you. Tell me all about it.” You both can hear each other’s smiles on the other side of the phone. 

3 years ago - August 22nd 

You and Rafe are laying in his bed, after getting back from a week-long visit to the Outer Banks, where you had met his family, who undoubtedly loved you, for the first time. Even his father, who clearly faked his support and affection for his son the whole week, this was easy to tell only because Rafe had told you all about him and his father while driving there, as a warning for you, just in case. 

“I love you,” He says, smiling into your stomach as you run your fingers through his hair. “Don’t see a future without you in it.” He mumbles and you smile, probably the widest you’ve ever smiled. “I love you, can’t wait to be with you forever and deal with the wonderful in-laws.” You laugh, teasingly and he chuckles, half out of embarrassment and half out of humor. Rafe had watched you immediately get along with his whole family and after telling you about his struggles with his family, he thought that you would think he was the problem, but you understood his point of view and believed him wholeheartedly.

3 years ago - August 23rd 

“Rafe, I’m pregnant. That’s why I’ve been sick. Went to the doctor’s today.” You stated, shaking from nerves and speaking in short sentences to make sure that he got point. Rafe stares at you, unmoving. His eyes are colder and emptier than you’ve ever seen them. It’s the way his father looks at him. “I don’t- I don’t know what to do. I’m so sorry, Rafe.” You stutter, trying to get him to say anything, do anything. Anything but what he’s doing right now. He quietly stands up from his bed and towers over you, “I’m sorry.” He says, looking away. “You know I can’t do that right now.” Your eyes widen, “Do what? Take care of a child? And I can? Alone?” He sighs and opens his door, “I’m sorry.” He says coldly, waiting for you to leave. Your eyes look at the door and immediately water. “What happened to being excited for the future? You never meant that, did you? Rafe, I’m twenty. I can’t do this alone!” You hope to get to him somehow, but you can see his walls are already built taller than you could ever break down. After taking one last look at him, you walk out of his room, for the last time. Preparing to raise a baby alone. 

2 years ago - April 23rd 

“You would have a baby on Earth Day.” Sarah laughs, while walking in the room. You smile at her, and the joke. “He’s already a little hippie.” Wheezie says from behind her, while holding flowers. “Hi you two,” You smile and give them weak hugs from your spot on your bed. After you let them go, they immediately swarm the cot that your newborn baby is laying in, cooing over him instantly. Sarah looks at you, “What name did you decide on?” 

“Crew Joseph Thomas.” You say, with a weak smile. They both coo in awe at him and his name quietly. You hear Wheezie mumble something about using Rafe’s middle name to Sarah, who quickly shushes her. 

A few hours later, Wheezie leaves to go get some food, leaving just you and Sarah in the room. “Did you tell him?” She asks, and you shake your head. “He said he couldn’t do it. I’m respecting that. I don’t think he should be in and out of Crew’s life. He’s either completely in or completely out.” You shrug, watching Crew sleep in his aunt Sarah’s arms. Wheezie walks in, frantically, “I’m so sorry, Y/N.” You and Sarah look up, confused. “What?” You say, furrowing your brows. “He’s here.” You and Sarah both look at each other, and your brain goes completely numb. “How did he find out?” Sarah asks, and Wheezie shakes her head, shrugging, “Maybe Rose told him, or dad? But I think he saw me.” She looks at you, apologetically, “I’m so sorry.” You sigh, “It’s alright, Wheeze. It’s not your fault. He was gonna find out at some point, better here than anywhere else, I guess.” 

After a few minutes of sitting in silence, there is a knock on the door. Sarah and Wheezie look at you, and you nod. Sarah hands Crew off to you and grabs Wheezie to sit outside. She opens the door and rolls her eyes at Rafe, pushing her and Wheezie past him and into the hallway. He walks in with his hands in his jeans pocket, trying to shrink in on himself. Maybe if he did, he wouldn’t be in a hospital room with his ex-girlfriend and their baby. He sniffs, “Hey.” You watch him walk across the room and stand at your feet, awkwardly. “Hi Rafe.” You say, quietly, “His name is Crew Joseph," watching Rafe eye Crew in your arms. “Joseph?” He asks, his eyes widening slightly and you nod. “Cameron?” He asks, finally making eye contact with you. You look at him and shake your head slowly, “Thomas. Thought it would be easier while he grows up.” He deflates slightly, but nods, “Yeah, no, makes sense.” 

There’s a moment of silence before you look down at Crew, who is now wide awake, “Do you want to hold him?” You ask quietly, not wanting to startle Rafe even further. You did feel slightly bad for him, you had all of your pregnancy to prepare for this moment, but Rafe is just now showing up and seeing his baby, without seeing the birth, or your pregnancy stomach. He looks up at you, and his lips separate, before closing back quickly. “You don’t hav-” “Yes, ple-” You both speak at the same time. He chuckles softly, “I do, I want to hold him.” 

After Rafe gets settled on the bed, at your feet, you pass Crew to him. Crew whines softly, and Rafe looks up at you, worried. You smile at him, reassuring him, “He’s fine. He’s just getting settled.” Rafe nods, trying to play it off, “Right, I remember Wheezie at this age.” He says, quietly. You smile softly at him, this is your Rafe. Well, not anymore, but he was. This is who you knew, not the cold, angry boy who threw you out of his room when you told him. He speaks up, “I can’t stick around. You know I can’t. I’m sorry.” He stares at Crew, staring up at Rafe from his place in his father’s protective arms. You nod, you expected this, you knew he wouldn’t stick around, you’ve prepared for it. “I think you should know that we’re moving back to Charleston after I graduate.” You say, just because he doesn’t want to be involved, doesn’t mean he shouldn’t know where his son is. 

After an hour of sitting with Crew and Rafe in peaceful silence, Rafe has to leave. With his hand on the doorknob, he turns to look at you, “I’ll be in the Outer Banks after this year. If you need anything, please let me know.” He says, quietly. You nod, “Rafe.” He looks up at you, “He’ll grow up knowing who you are. He’ll know who is dad is, but I won’t say why you couldn’t be here.” He blinks rapidly and nods, before closing the door. 

[changisworld]

since it's I.N's month, could be one where gf decides to do something "special" for him, shoving her underwear on his pocket and waiting for him on the restroom?

literally sprinted to post this JUST in time for his bday😭 HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY JEONGIN<3

©ANY translation, copy & paste, posting of my work is strictly forbidden for ANY posts/ writing i post.

PSA FOR ASKS/REQUESTS: i WILL get around to posting everyone’s requests i’m just sorry if it takes a bit of time but whatever you request i’ll post it!! IM ALSO MAKING AN ANON LIST!! just send me anything & tell me what emoji u wanna be!<3

18+, MDNI!! smut warnings under the cut

WORD COUNT:1,874

main masterlist here

any reblogs/ comments are deeply appreciated!!

SMUT WARNINGS; oral(M receive), public sex, marking, pet names;baby, hunny etc, quite cute tbh, public teasing, finger sucking, mentions of spit, tiniest tiniest bit of dirty talk?? aftercare(as much as you can give in a public bathroom.) creampie, SO much eye contact, bits of fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You are currently out for dinner with Jeongin, Seungmin & your friend Yuna for Jeongins birthday. (happy 23rd birthday jeongin<3). The dinner has been going really well & you’re enjoying the food you ordered & a glass of wine ordered by yuna, You’re laughing with the 3 of them when you feel jeongin put his hand on the top of your thigh & caress it, his eyes not even batting down once, still talking to Seungmin about random group activities.

You suck in a deep breath, trying to act as if the simple gesture isn’t already making you blush & heat up under his touch. You put your hand above his & hold it as you continue eating & talking but his hand moves again but this time, he’s moves his hand forward, now cupping the part of your cunt that he can reach with you sitting down. You stop chewing half way through, feeling yourself leaking in your panties. You throw a flushed look to Jeongin but he just looks back giving you the same gorgeous dimpled smile he always does. A second later, he pulls his hand away to help put his dish onto the middle of the table to help the waitress take away the plates easier.

You think for a moment before coming up with a plan.

You ‘accidentally’ drop your fork & reach down to pick it up, but at the same time you use your free hand to wiggle your panties off your legs, past your heels & you ball it up in your hand before putting the fork you dropped, onto the pile of plates.

The waitress comes & takes the dishes away a few minutes later & refills everyone’s wine & you begin looking at menus.

“Since it’s Jeongins birthday, y/n where are you gonna take him hm?” Seungmin winks, smiling over the menu hes holding. You raise your eyebrows & smile back

“It’s a surprise, lips are sealed sorry. anyways i’m gonna go to the bathroom, if i’m not back in time, order me the chocolate molten lava cake please” Yuna nods at you & Jeongin, Yuna & seungmin keep having their own conversation, in the meantime you lean over to kiss his cheek but you also put your hand in his pocket & drop the panties that have been balled up in your hand for the past 5 minutes, into his pocket.

You stand up & head to the bathroom, smiling to yourself, feeling proud. You turn the corner & head into the single woman’s bathroom stall & close the door, not locking it. You walk over to the sink & look at yourself & dab your finger on the tip of your lips, getting rid of the slightly messy lipstick from eating.

Not even two minutes later, the door opens & steps in Jeongin. You turn around so you’re leaning against the sink, facing him.

“Took ya long enough, what did you tell them?” You ask, reaching over slightly & pulling his dress tie towards you so he is now right in front of you, he smiles & starts twirling your hair on his finger while looking into your eyes.

“Some lame excuse about me saying i was gonna go find a person who could ask the chef to give me strawberry sauce instead of caramel.” He chuckles slightly before leaning down to your neck to bite it slightly, you hiss at the contact.

“And they just believed it?” You lean into his mouth & touch, already palming his cock through his dress pants, creating an obvious tent.

“Who cares if they didn’t, they wouldn’t say anything regardless, but we need to make this quick baby, don’t wanna get kicked out by getting caught now do we?” He asks you rhetorically, hand already sliding down to cup your pussy, not surprisingly already dripping, You sigh at the contact & loosen his the & undo the top three buttons so you have access to his collarbones before leaning in & sucking a mark on them, hand still working on his boner.

“You’re so wet baby, did my hand really do this to you hm? you get off on such simple touches in front of our friends hm?” you can feel him smirking against your neck as he pulls back before making eye contact with you, reaching into his pocket & pulling out your soaked panties.

“So dirty my love, couldn’t even wait until we got home hm? you wanted me in here so badly” You roll your eyes before pulling him by the tie again & kissing him again, your lipstick smudging on his face along with your own. “You’re just as dirty baby, you knew where to find me & came, into the girls bathroom too.” you say in-between kisses.

You undo his zipper & trouser button before pulling them along with his underwear just enough to set his cock free, already hard & red, leaking at the tip slightly. You stop kissing him to trail yourself down his frame until you end up on his knees & you instantly kiss his tip, making it even more red but with your lipstick staining it this time, you’re convinced his dick blushed. You look up at Jeongin whos looking down at you with nothing but love but also lust in his eyes, which makes you think you genuinely leaked onto the floor.

You take his tip into your mouth & begin twirling your tongue around it just the way he likes. Your hands reach up on instinct & start playing with his balls & he grips onto the sink to balance himself as he throws his head back, biting his lip to try hold back his whines.

“Your mouth is so f-ffucking good baby, it’s so wet holy fuck” He says, trying to keep his voice calm but just comes out high pitched & whiny. You decide to thank his compliment by hallowing your cheeks as much as you possibly can & going as deep as you can, your nose almost touches his pelvis as you begin humming & gagging around him, spit coming out your mouth & dripping onto your knees & the floor beneath you.

After another minute or so, he pulls your hair roughly off his dick, you whine at the sudden gesture.

“Sorry baby i-i was gonna cum, yo-your mouth is too good. get up on the sink plea-se” He pants out, sweat beading at his forehead & getting caught in his eyebrows. You stand up, giggling at how fucked out he was & begin to climb onto the sink but he helps you anyway.

He hikes your dress up & puts his fingers to your lips, you open your mouth instantly & you let them rest on your tongue before you coat them with spit. He pulls them back out & runs them over your already dripping cunt.

“Didn’t even need your spit baby, you’re soaked already, here, use this to keep you quiet” He hands them to you & you take this opportunity to put them in your mouth, looking up at him with shiny eyes.

“Don’t even need to prep ya’, you ready?” He asks, how pumping his wet dick in his hand slowly, waiting for your go-ahead.

You nod instantly & desperately so he breaches your cunt with the tip & you shudder & his eyebrows furrow. He slides all the way to the hilt & you throw your head back & groan into the fabric in your mouth.

Jeongin leans over you & pulls the panties out of your mouth & shoves them back in his pocket & bites your bottom lip.

“I’ll just silence your moans with my lips instead hunny” You begin to whine as you already feel your orgasm bubbling up, Jeongin knows your body like the back of his hand & knows exactly where to hit to get you to cum almost instantly.

“You’re so fucking b-big innie holy fuck, n-not gonna last” you say, eyes rolling back.

“don’t speak like that unless you don’t wanna cum before i do i mean it, you’re moulded just for my dick.. i’m sure of it.” He says back, voice breathy & whiny.

He starts kissing you as his other hand worms it’s way down to your clit & starts pressing down on it & drawing figures with it just the way you like it & before you can even warn him, you’re clenching around his dick & you cum. Your legs begin shaking & you break the kiss & you end up with your lips against his neck & you subconsciously suck a dark hickey onto it. Jeongin cums straight after seeing & feeling your orgasm & lips on his neck. His ropes of cum shoot out inside you & you feel it inside you too.

You both come down from your orgasms together, Jeongin in-between your legs, putting most of his body weight on you as you are still on top of the sink against the wall, panting heavily. You give the hickey you just gave him a gentle kiss & you reach over to grab some paper towels from the paper towel dispenser & start dabbing jeongins face from all the sweat on it & he laughs.

“I think i need a bit more than a few paper towels hunny, look at me.” You laugh, looking up at his face as he looks at himself in the mirror, face & neck completely covered in lipstick, all smudged.

“i dont even wanna know what my face must look like if yours is that covered” you say, getting off the sink with Jeongins help & you both let out another chuckle at the state of your face, lips still stained with lipstick but your cheeks are just as stained as them.

Jeongin & you both work on trying to make yourselves look presentable again but it proves a lot easier said than done. Jeongin kisses your cheek while you are still trying to get your hair to not look as if a bird lives in it.

“That’s the best it’s gonna get y/n, you have a brush in your clutch bag.” Jeongin says, holding your waist from behind & balancing his chin on you. “I wonder if dessert arrived yet, cmon we gotta go, probably a hugeee line outside the bathroom right now.” He gives you a kiss on your cheek & looks in the mirror again, sighing.

“Well we would have gave them a good audio show wouldnt we?” you chuckle to him, throwing your hair up to cover all the tugs. “alright, let’s go. hope you enjoyed this birthday present baby” You turn around & hold onto his shoulders.

“Just being with you is an amazing birthday present, why not i give you a ‘thank you’ present at home hm? by the way, i’m keeping these. for my own use.” He says, smiling at you with his dimples on his cheeks, holding your panties in his palm again.

You giggle before walking over & unlocking the door, hand in hand with Jeongin & swallowing your pride before walking back over to the table with Yuna & Seungmin… who had already finished dessert.

[otdiaftg]

The King's Men - Chapter Fifteen (17)

Day: Friday, March 22nd / 23rd* Time: 9:58 PM EST

It is Kevin's turn to deal with the press, but he sends Neil a significant look on his way over to them. Neil has nothing to add since he'd been sidelined all night, but he steps closer in case Kevin needs to redirect anything his way. Kevin gives his best press-ready smile to the camera before motioning Andrew over. Andrew takes up post alongside Neil but doesn't look at the reporters. The interview starts off predictably with comments on the game and the impossible points Kevin had scored. Neil half-tunes it out until Kevin is asked about semifinals. The Bearcats are going home as the lowest-scoring team of this elimination round. In two weeks the Foxes will be taking on two of the Big Three. "I'm looking forward to playing USC again," Kevin says. "I haven't spoken to Jeremy or Coach Rhemann since I transferred but their team is always amazing. Their season was nearly flawless this year. There's a lot we can learn from them." "Still their biggest fan," the interviewer jokes. "You're up against Edgar Allan again, too, in the biggest rematch of the year. Thoughts?" "I don't want to talk about the Ravens anymore," Kevin says. "Ever since my mother died it's been Ravens this and Ravens that. I am not a Raven anymore. I never will be again. To be honest, I never should have been one in the first place. I should have gone to Coach Wymack the day I found out he was my father and asked to start my freshman year at Palmetto State." "The day—" She flounders, then says, "Did you say Coach Wymack is your father?" "Yes, I did. I found out when I was in high school," Kevin says, "but I didn't tell him because I thought I wanted to stay at Edgar Allan. Back then I thought the only way to be a champion was to be a Raven. I bought into their lies that they would make me the best player on the court. I shouldn't have believed it; I've been wearing this number long enough to know that wasn't what they wanted for me. "Everyone knows the Ravens are all about being the best. Best pair, best line-up, best team. They drill it into you day after day, make you believe it, make you forget that in the end 'best' means 'one'. They let you forget until other people buy into it, be it fans swaying too far the wrong way or the ERC calling them out on their schemes. Then they don't want to play that game anymore, and they skip straight to the elimination round. Did you know I've never been skiing? I'd like to try it one day, though." It is too much all at once for her to catch the significance of that last remark, but it will only take a couple moments. Neil understands right away, and the adrenaline that floods his veins makes him sway a little on his feet. He shoots Andrew a quick look. Andrew doesn't return it, but he is definitely paying attention. The stare he has trained on the back of Kevin's head is intense. Kevin doesn't wait for her to put two and two together. "Tell the Ravens to be ready for us, would you? We're already ready for them." Kevin turns and walks away.

Art used with permission by Reigzukes. Thank you @reigzukes!

*Due to the Leap Year, I have opted to highlight the day rather than the date to keep the events in occurrence to the 2007 year. I will continue to mark both days accordingly.