#and i do NOT need that kind of stress rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

starbuck · 6 months

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just made the worst PowerPoint of my life and i’m going to turn it in for five million points

#lie - it’s actually just not done yet #but i also don’t feel like doing it - this is my issue #it isn’t due until next Sunday but i also need it done today for Personal Reasons #so we are Vibing i suppose #my geography final is done and i should probably just turn it in #but Also i don’t trust my professor to not be a HUGE freak and grade it right away #and i do NOT need that kind of stress rn #i’ll probably turn it in right before i leave for the concert tonight #bc I’ll be so stressed i won’t give a shit #but in the meantime there are other finals to finish #which like UGHHHHHHHHHHHH #but also they’re all literally almost done and i have plenty of time - I just have to Do It #and i will #but first: Lunch.

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clarabowmp3 · 7 months

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I’m sorry I genuinely cannotttttt understand how some ppl bash joe even in a joking manner. Like the poor guy did nothing wrong (that we know of) but so many ppl are making such snide remarks by comparing him to Travis which is not only condescending but actually kind of mean! HELLO did we listen to the same reputation album??? You can’t praise Travis for letting Taylor bejeweled and then rip joe to shreds in the same breath when joe was the one there for her in a clearly difficult and trying time in her life

#the ripping to shreds is a little exaggerated cuz there’s not that much vitriol behind it #but I just find the callous attitude to be so disgusting and insincere #like the love for Travis is sooo much rn I can’t imagine ppl hating him if they broke up #but I couldn’t imagine that for joe either #and another thing I think has to do with how public they are which is fine #but because ppl see so much physical proof of Travis being loving it somehow automatically proves joe wasnt #he was a private man! let him be!!#and if that wasn’t smth Taylor liked/struggled with she dealt with it like the grown woman she is #I’m not saying she didn’t face any kind of emotional stress in that r/ship #but if she did/going off of her songs she dealt with it like an adult #and now that chapters closed and ofc we can still talk abt joe but the subtle menace towards him is sooo immature #like some ppl rlly need to grow up/touch grass #and I’m not hating on travis like him not being there in 2016 is not a dig towards him #it’s just pointing out who WAS there which a lot of ppl seem to be forgetting #joe alwyn #travis kelce #taylor swift

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runawaymun · 1 month

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#sorry let me rant real quick in the tags #cw personal #once again hitting an insurance pothole bc the psych says she accepts my OHP plan HOWEVER the therapy group she is contacted with says #THEY don't #they only accept the insurance if it's through my employer but NOT through the government??????????????#so there's still some kind of payment???#anyway I want to scream why is this so complicated #like will she take my insurance or not who's right here #anyway called her back directly and went to voicemail so now I've done all I can for now #why the hell is this so hard man #the person on the phone didn't know really how to explain #once again no one knows what they're talking about #like can y'all not communicate and figure this out?#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #i need to get an ADHD eval before my next PCP appointment in june so that they will continue giving me my meds #and the psychiatry through the hospital has a limited number of visits that insurance will cover #*contracted #not retyping all of that #and once again the only reason this is so stressful is because the psychiatry group at the hospital fumbled the communication ball last tim #and the psychiatrist I was with never put the ADHD on the chart #and now somehow it's MY responsibility to fix that>#UGH #like I am grateful to have some kind of coverage but holy shit is the US healthcare system in shambles #the bureaucracy is INSANE #i had to just sit down and put my head in my hands for a second #and then go 'right okay nothing i can do about that rn moving on'#uGH #literally said 'what the FUCK' out loud a couple times #like not on the phone after I hung up obvs

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boag · 8 months

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I mentioned this briefly yesterday but basically my mom lost her little purse while walking the dogs and we’ve looked everywhere in our neighborhood and someone definitely took it bc it’s nowhere to be found. We have no way to track the location of anything in it bc she still has her phone, but the purse contained literally everything else we had. All of our money and all of my mom’s cards and important items were in it and now we have absolutely nothing. So if anyone could help us out so we can pay for food and bills and stuff while we sort this out it would really be SO appreciated like we’re just completely screwed rn 😭 Anything any of you could spare would really help us so much like we’re currently just penniless with no backup plan or anything and we used the rest of the little food we had to make dinner tonight and now we have nothing left

My Cashapp, PayPal, and Venmo are all karmabauer

#I hate that I keep having to do this but yeah we rlly need the help rn #and I’m currently busy with therapy and everything bc I finally got mental health treatment again #after struggling to get into any programs for so long #and my therapist and case worker both want me to get myself to a point where I’m much more mentally stable #before they help me get back in the workforce #which I agree with them on bc the last few jobs I’ve had have ended rlly badly bc of how badly I was doing mentally #but it’s rlly stressful that I haven’t been able to get a new source of income for so long #I’m making a lot of progress tho so soon I’ll def be able to be more self sufficient #and idk I just rlly appreciate those of you who’ve helped me during this time #and anyone who may decide to help now #love y’all sm genuinely 😭 u guys are really so kind and make me feel so much hope idk :’) 💖

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spaceratprodigy · 8 days

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sorry for how slow and sparse I've been getting around to everyone. I'm doing my best but genuinely rn I desperately need to take care of myself instead of always putting others first.

#I've been. not okay mentally or emotionally for a few weeks now.#and I'm eternally grateful for the. like. 2 people that know that and have been so kind and patient with me.#and I feel bad for not giving as much as I want to be to /everyone/ right now and how much I feel like I'm falling behind.#but I don't have the energy or the will rn and I need to be shaken and forced to rest.#I'm so depressed and stressed out and anxious over every little thing rn.#my sense of self-worth is fucking shot and I'm trying so hard to be brave and remind myself people really do care about me.#that I'm not nuisance that I'm not causing problems and ruining everything that it's not better for everyone if I just wasn't in the picture #idk this isn't like. I want to be swarmed with reassurances right now.#it's more of just. I'm sorry. I know my mood is fluctuating and I'm very slow lately.#I promise I'm not ignoring anyone.#I'm just in a not great spot and it's taking a bad toll on me especially when I know how I am trying to appease others.#while giving up my own well-being giving up my own heart.#I just need to rest and take it easy for a bit. I promise everything is fine.#rambling #maybe delete later

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devilsskettle · 2 months

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i hate that this website has location based ads now like it's one thing to promote the local grocery store chain to me but i am seeing ads for my workplace now :/

#stop it......#i don't want to go back but this is the last sick day i can reasonably take #i probably should've gone back today but i told them when i was still feeling worse that i wasn't coming in.......#ohhhh i dread going in tomorrow so much. i don't even dislike this job i just hate being somewhere everyday #each day feeling its meaninglessness...... my meaninglessness in the space.......... the repetition and redundancy #selling people who don't need to be there things that they don't need #standing all day long just fucking bored #hoping that enough has happened since i've been gone that people can fill me in #ugggh because it's soooo boring but stressful to have to generate conversation with the same people every day #when nothing new ever happens #and i get sick of everybody even the people that i like and i don't really think anybody likes me that much either #i guess i felt this when i worked there part time but because i only had to be there part time it wasn't this constant gnawing feeling #and they didn't have me in the shop all the time....... this schedule is fucking killing me #i walk there i stand all day and i walk home #that's one of the reasons i haven't come back in yet - i was so dizzy and nauseous that the idea of standing all day was like.#i obviously can't fucking do that even if i would otherwise feel well enough to come in #if i had a sitting job then it wouldn't matter if i was a little dizzy #but getting back and forth to work and then standing for 8 hours. even when i'm feeling well it's kind of a lot #idk i guess i'm pretty unhappy with this job and where i am in life etc but i can't quit rn because what else would i do #there's literally job of this type that is going to pay as well and have good benefits #and i'm not qualified yet for the type of work i hope to do in the future #so i just gotta wait it out but it feels like. endless.#sigh anyway i'm just lazy lol #all this is to say. stop putting ads for my workplace on my dash lol i don't need to see all that

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professionalowl · 4 months

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i am very fond of my professor as i am sure you all have picked up on at this point but if he keeps talking about my hypothetical doctorate i am going to hit him with my shoe

#i am a second year undergraduate. i barely even know what taxes are.#i don't need a five minute lecture about my future in academia i need to curl up in a ball and take a long nap and have a few free days #to do exploratory reading and figure out what i need to do NOW for my UNDERGRAD dissertation #aughgh. Augh this is such a stupid thing to feel bad about I should be ecstatic about it and I am but it's so.#it's not even really his fault i think he's earnestly trying to be encouraging it's just maybe too genuine rn #i love you. thank you for believing in me. shut the fuck upppppppppp #had this exchange on monday and it is genuinely stressing me out so much as if there isn't ENOUGH pressure #to perform well academically at this stupid ass university just generally now this specific guy thinks i am some kind of prodigy #academia is such a scam. god. like i'll do it but i'm going to be complaining about it the whole time #uni adventures

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multicolour-ink · 3 months

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Should I keep persevering with TOTK, or just give up on it entirely?

I've hit a dilemma with the game and I don't know how to deal with it.

- The difficulty frustrates me.

- The Depths messes with my head. On the one hand I love exploring. But on the other hand, I've always been nervous af and hate horror. Any time I'm down in the depths, I get an intense sense of dread and the darkness becomes too much after a while.

- I keep forgetting the Sky Islands exist (and there's barely anything up there).

- Caves make me angry.

#I only enjoy stabbing enemies but then my weapons break and I get mad #I dunno this is very clearly a me thing #and I have stress in my life rn #but honestly do I even care about games anymore?#dunno I need some kind of advice #the legend of zelda #totk #loz totk #tears of the kingdom #the legend of zelda tears of the kingdom

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sschmendrick · 13 days

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Gotta write a production report for two songs we recorded and I'm gonna have to do at least a third of it for a group of 6 after having done about half of the recording and editing work for one of these two projects...all that cause I still haven't found an internship so I can't just say : do it without me.

It's a little exhausting. I know they will work if I really push them but they'll do it super late and I'll have to revise it when I get back home from the small concert I've allowed myself to go instead of my portuguese lesson (brazilian artist so it's all good my teacher said, I still feel bad) and I'll have to run around tomorrow morning to print it and I'll assume the cost again.

It's...yeah it's exhausting. And my thesis is so far behind, and I still have no internship. I wanna keep strong but man that diploma is slipping away from me. I'm not even sure I have good enough grades at my exams now !

#yeah ok the anxiety is back #I have meds that are over the counter so like not great stuff but I'll just chug that down and hope it does something #plus I'm super stressed cause some of them are coming to a small party at my place (for once that I'm alone without my brother there)#and I was talkign with one of them (the closer one) about maybe coming out to them and he said yeah if you want :)#but now one of them is bringing his girlfriend and I am noooot doing that but also my place is a very intimate space for me #I so rarely invite people over because of that #I should stop drinking coffee it might be helping #my head is killing me #I'm so close to giving up on my studies all together and reimburse my mom #but I don't want to !! the people that inspire me the people i look up to the people i want to be like fought for it and never gave up #I'm not even sure I'm made for these studies. I have no ambition I just want to make people happy with music but the kind I love doesn't #really require me ? cause it's mostly small concerts with acoustics instruments #maybe I should have gone into idk social work but I'm pretty sure I would be way too anxious for it same reason i can't be a therapist #and the situation at home isn't much better rn #I really need to breath rn or I'm gonna be out of commission for so long that it will be even more stressful to do the reports at midnight #I'm gonna chicken out tonight as well and just stand there and listen and not talk to the artist afterwards and try to use the portuguese #I've learned nooo I'm just gonna default to english or french

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pilotstreets · 8 months

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guys im drafting up my first two week notice i've ever had to write 😬 im turning it in tomorrow and i'm really nervous but really excited. if anyone has tips on writing a two week notice and would like to share i would very much appreciate it kdhskfjskd

#im leaving one position as a dance teacher to start my career in sign language and like #this is the beginning of my dream? omg? im working at one dance studio still but im also going to be signing? for a JOB?#im a dance teacher AND doing sign language this is like my dream rn #and this will greatly help me with getting asl certified eventually and getting my foot in the door for future jobs w asl #omg!!!!!! omg!!!! also im listening to stressed out while i write my notice #just for the 'wake up you need to money' part KFHSKFHSKF #it's applicable to my situation hehe #between my asl job and teaching dance part time and writing on the side im actually living my dream kind of????#this is so insane y'all. but anyway enough tag rambling #;malls;

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silverislander · 2 months

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i have 7 assignments, total, left in school. once i finish those i'm going to be done- i graduate in may which is WILD to think about. i just have to fucking do them

#im not getting anything done today so far and its like. midway through the afternoon already #and i realized how close i am to graduating and how i have no idea what comes after that and now im just kind of directionlessly panicked #which is. really helping the situation as you could imagine /s #im really close to finishing a couple of things rn. could get at least one done today #i REALLY need to get to work on my essay bc that largely determines whether i get honours and im pretty behind schedule on it #and i havent looked at at least one final assn and i do NOT have much time left to start it. its not small #theres barely any time left in the semester at all #i just need to finish Smth today #levi.txt #i cant make myself do anything and im panicked abt that which makes it impossible to do anything #and taking breaks makes me feel guilty AND panicked so i cant even reset w a short break and come back #my parents Consistent response to my anxiety has been. poor at best. and they dont believe i have adhd at all #so if i talk to them abt either of those things they get upset w me and claim i just dont want to take their 'advice' so i cant be helped #and the advice is shit like 'dont feel that way' and 'simply go do your work'#like. i talked to my mom abt how stressed i feel bc im behind and her response was basically 'thats what you get for falling behind'#i havent seen my friends in a while either or at least not in an environment where we can actually hang out and talk #idk man. i just really wish i could stay in bed and watch a show and not feel sick bc of how anxious i am abt it all #i want to write again. i miss it a lot i havent been able to write in months now

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ban-joey · 7 months

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sending laser beams to my professor with my mind. kenneth you said midterm grades would b up by this afternoon. it is officially TONIGHT and guess what? kenneth i would love to not be clenching my teeth in my sleep tonight. kenneth i will be sending you a bill in the mail. yes i know its probably a TAs responsibility but i blame you personally. i hate school

#i dont im having a lot of fun (genuinely) but it is often pretty stressful #did find out there are a few folks adjacent to my program doing zoonoses & climate change research so im very excited to chat w them next w #possibly directing my thesis towards one health. social epi gradually becoming less interesting #plus i think my strengths do lie in applying epi to biological concepts so. one health works there #my brain continually trying to get back to lyme disease :( sometimes i really do miss the east coast tbh!#not lying actually i think the number one thing i miss is the amt of vector borne disease research LMFAO #i do unfortunately kind of have a crush on a classmate so that's fine but whatever. grad school. men are nice to me and i lose my mind ig #need to go make out w a hot trans person i think that would solve my problems rn #but also it's nice to be so excited about someone deciding to sit next to me in every class :)#like wow how isolated have i been the last 3 years to be so delighted by like. active signs i have Officially Made Friends.#even if he does live like a block away from my dad and jokes every goddamn day like 'so i saw your dad yesterday' no you DIDNT shut UP #idk yesterday he sat right next to me in a class he usually sits w other people in and it sort of sent my brain off the edge and now im jus #yeah. sitting with this one. it's fine like it's normal. but wowie i do think it's my first time having a Big Ol Crush since (redacted)#a little scary for my animal brain i think but it's okay!#im 25 in like 3 ish weeks and i still get embarrassed about this stuff somehow? stupid.#he's just really nice and always really fun to talk to! i think i had to officially Sit With Myself today bc epi is doing a holiday party #and there's a baking contest and we were talking abt it in class and i was indecisive abt whether i want to participate #and he like fully cut me off and was like oh you should bake something so i can have some :)#and. well fuck now i have to lmao. IM SO EASY IT'S SO EMBARRASSING #good evening everyone. guess this is my journal now. anyway ken rice you owe me twenty dollars and i aim to COLLECT

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polaraffect · 3 months

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feeling very "want to disappear to a medium-sized northeastern town, live in a tiny studio apartment with a cat, work in a small music/book store that might slowly be killing me via asbestos, and take a small class once a week for something slightly eccentric like ballroom dancing or candle making" rn

#damien.txt #aka i want to up and leave and make my life incredibly simple for a while #there's no way i could live off of what's listed above in this economy but. sigh. i wish i could.#i feel like that kind of life would be like. hard in some ways. but also in others a kind of simple hard that would be nice to me. rn.#of course. it's romanticized and certainly a fantasy stemming from 'I wish my mental illnesses weren't real' because in reality #it would almost certainly be just as hard as my life rn because im trying to work around debilitating mental illness but #y'know. a guy can dream or whatever #i need to just start taking steps to go do things that give me that same vibe. like going to an orchestral concert or visiting a cat cafe #or other things of that nature. things that give me... idk. simple vibes.#i cannot stress enough that i know these things aren't simple but like. idk. brain association. i associate it with like #i guess slowing down? and actually living life. which i have not been. doing a whole lot of recently.#anyways. that's my thoughts. thanks for reading my rant if you did lol

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roses-and-tears · 3 months

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#I have spent. 8 almost 9 hours resetting my laptop. I chose the option to keep all my files but uninstall apps. and it has been restarting #and installing for almost 9 hours. yeah I get that the process will be long. but ffs #I have been bored the past few hours so I watched the smile movie bc I got reminded of it yesterday #it was pretty bad. the couple gorey scenes towards the end were nice but some of the acting and writing was just terrible #I was also hoping the movie would’ve taken a different turn. I think it would’ve made it more.. idk. I can’t think of the right term.-#-it just would’ve made it better I think.#I’ve also eaten a lot today. more than I usually do. more than I have in months and years and im upset about that. im already bloated.#I hope I don’t work tomorrow. I have to call in in the morning to check. and I don’t mind working but rn I just kind of want to spend the #day relaxing #I’ve spent almost 9 hours on this resetting part. and 4 extra hours trying to simply repair it in restarts #I also need to clean up my room. a lot of it. and clean my pets cage. it’s ant season now and im really stressed about that #the smell of sharpie returns and I am just. overwhelmed. I have 3 days to prepare for my special week long activity and im not happy about-#-that.#I also had some feelings earlier that im stressed over too.#im being vague about that bc i just don’t want to go off about that to everyone #im tired and overwhelmed i just want my laptop to finish resetting so i can stop fretting about this. i want to sleep #im tired. of so much #to delete later

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ragingtwilight · 8 months

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Just experienced worlds most awkward tense phonecall and now i want to lie in bed for a week

#kind of venty?#im stressed af #i think the person i was talking to just quit their job openly on the phone after answering me and cussing out #so like phone anxiety galore rn #i had smth important to do but i did not sleep either and the other place i called was busy af arfhhbhh #never want to call someone again ever #bruh i gotta wait till next week bc rn im gonna vom and the place i needed ro go to is gonna be closed on the weekend #im #A #i feel the weight of ten million million brucks on me like im weirdly paralyzed after that #idek why they answered the phone they were already cussing out 💀💀💀

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wifegideonnav · 1 year

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homestuck is getting SAD and i don’t WANT THIS i want to read about shitty children lovingly bullying each other i don’t want to watch them sobbing over each other’s corpses :/

#I’ve gotten stuck in reread village #just refinished act 3. skipping the stupid intermission. so not too long from now I will be right back at the sad parts #it’s just like. i think part of the reason i latched onto hs over christmas is bc a piece of engaging media with an interesting plot/#relatable and lovable characters/CRUCIALLY a very stupid sense of humor was exactly what I needed #and now I’m like. invested and it’s getting angsty. which I am into!!! but I’m like. v stressed out rn #which makes me fragile #and so I want my fiction to be an escape yk? which it can’t really be (at least not that kind of escape) if it gets my emotions up #but it’s like I rly want to get to act 6 #I’m 2/3(?) of the way through 5.2 so I’m almost there #and I really want them all to get together + I’ve been promised lots of juicy character development and relationship building #but I also know it keeps getting angstier #and so idk what to do lol!!!#whatever rant over I’ll figure it out #my friend and I have been reading out loud a lot so that’s probably how I’ll do it #bc it’s more fun plus I can yell with her and also hit her when I’m mad that I started it in the first place lol #bc of the angst #(she’s starting htn soon and I can’t wait for the roles to be reversed teehee)#anyway. rant over for real now #if youre still reading this send me a spoiler free ask about how much you love terezi or kanaya or something #op #hs

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