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#and i remember my friend saying how weird that was at the time that she had literally searched up my name
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unpopular(ish) tig opinions/mostly just me ranting
a few people have done this so here are mine (also just me ranting)
this one isn't super controversial but i don't really like alisa. she's nice and all, but the way she treats libby is just so weird to me and i can't bring myself to love her.
most people in this fandom are grayson stans but my fav is jameson. i love grayson, don't get me wrong, but i feel like his character is sort of overdone. i mean, almost all love interests nowadays are moody, broody, i never smile except when im with you. im happy avery ended up with jamie not just cause they fit together, but bc, for once, the love interest isn't the broody type (like i said, love grayson dont hate me)
i commented this under a post, and i don't think this is super unpopular but im lyra neutral. i literally cannot love a character unless i know them (i dont hate her either, i just don't have an opinion)
ok, this one might get me some hate, but, although grayson had the right to be mad in tig bc avery inherited the money, i do think he did go too far sometimes. there's this one time, where he was just unnecessarily rude to avery, telling her she didn't know what it was like to suffer (midway through to book, don't remember the chapter but its there and it makes no sense bc she grew up with no money while this dude is a privileged white man, like all of his brothers (except for xander cause he isn't white)). like i said, he had the right to be mad, but avery did nothing to him, and, so, he had no right to say some of the things he said to her. he does get better, and he does apologize (i think, but even if he doesn't idc cause hes nice to her now). like i said, he had the right to be mad cause i mean he did grow up thinking he'd inherit and he didn't, but he shouldn't have taken out all of his anger on her. he had the right to doubt her and think she had ulterior motives, but he had no right to accuse her of being a gold digger when she had done NOTHING to gray for him think that (dont take this as me not liking gray, he's one of my fav characters ever (but no one beats jamie (and nash)))
idk if this one will make sense and ik some people will agree with me if this does, but the way avery is treated in this fandom is really shitty. she's pretty much only mentioned when people are talking about the love triangle. she's bashed bc she didn't choose grayson (which she had the right to bc jamie was made for her and gray wasn't), her trauma is super overlooked. i wish people would pay more attention to her. also, i mentioned this earlier, but some people (not many but some) let other people (like gray and thea) get away will at the mean things they said to avery bc they're their favorite characters. (obviously, they can be your fav characters. my best friend's fav character is gray, and, when i first read the books, i liked gray over jamie for a small period of time, but its wrong to let them get away things just bc you like them.
people will agree with me, but jameson and grayson's trauma should NOT be compared. trauma is trauma no matter how "bad" it is (note the quotation marks around bad). ive mostly seen people compare jamie to gray saying that gray's trauma is worse which is so fucking mean. they both have trauma. they both have it bad. no one should be comparing. i will make a longer post about this bc this is smth i'm very passionate about and it pisses me off. (ive lost count of the amount of times ive compared my trauma to others thinking i had no right to complain bc others had it worse, so don't do it to fictional characters plsss)
the tiktok/insta fandom sucks. the amount of averygrayson shippers ive seen bash avery on those platforms is too much. the only healthy part of the fandom is on tumblr.
not controversial but thea is not a girl boss, she's just a mean girl. she's not iconic.
people should not bash people for their favorite characters. i've seen this mostly on older posts (like before tfg was released) but some people will go 'xander's my fav' or 'avery's my fav' and people in the comments would go 'but grayson exists' or 'but jameson exists'. let people like who they want to like. all characters are great (mostly, i hate thea and all of the bad guys).
i couldn't care less about eve's redemption arc. she ruined toby's life, and as someone who loves toby and avery's father-daughter dynamic, i will never forgive her. she also treated grayson horribly, basically got alisa kidnapped (cause alisa wouldn't have gotten kidnapped if eve hadn't gotten toby kidnapped), and more so if she ever does get a redemption arc, i will be throwing hands.
if i see people complaining about lyra's character when tgg comes out bc 'they were expecting someone different' i will be pissed. im sure lyra will be great (hopefully). it doesn't matter if she's a girl boss or a more like rebecca.
grayson is not 'the most misunderstood character in the fandom'. he's literally the most popular character. people are constantly gushing about him and his trauma. other characters like avery, jameson, and xander (and others) are so much more misunderstood. no ones takes the time to understand them like they do with grayson. people are constantly talking about his trauma, and how people shouldn't hate him bc he's 'misunderstood'. people have the right to hate him, and his trauma isn't overlooked as the fandom's most popular character. he is a complex character, and i will be making in depth posts about him bc i find him interesting and i really like his character, but he's the most understood character in the fandom. i've noticed that people tend to say he's misunderstood right after coming up with the most nonsensical take defending all of his actions saying that he has trauma (trauma is not an excuse its an explanation)
even if grayson would've gotten up to help avery after the bombing 1. he would've never gotten there on time and 2. he might have gotten more hurt.
i said this earlier while talking about gray but trauma is not an excuse its an explanation. do with that what you will. i just have to repeat it.
people who claim jameson was not affected by emily's trauma are the bane of my existence (yes, they exist, i've seen them)
ik i mentioned gray a lot in this and it might seem like i don't like him, but i swear i LOVE him. i find his character very interesting and complex and i really wanna analyze his character once i'm done rereading. i just hate toxic grayson stans (most of yall aren't, but they exist)
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xoxof4ye · 19 hours
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WY@??
ch. 2 m.list ex choso x freader
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
five years ago
“i don’t understand why i can’t go with you!” you're sitting in your living room with your parents being in your junior year and 17; you just wanted to live out “the best year of your life” before you had to grow up, but unfortunately for you, your parents had other plans. “honey, we just can’t take you with us. you don’t know what america is like. we would be too busy to help you settle in." you sat there with a frown at the thought, “your moms right, i'm sorry, but it’s best if you stay with your grandma; she needs the company, and you two get along well together." your father smiled sweetly, thinking about the time you would visit her and how happy the both of you were.
she practically helped raise you while your parents were always working. he understood how you felt.
“i promise you, i promise i’ll try to visit as much as i can.” you didn’t have a bad relationship with your father. yes, you guys were distant, but there were always those little times that you two never forgot “f/n! don’t make a promise you can’t keep, plus it’d be too much work. let’s just come back every other holiday, or we’ll fly her out when we can."
your mother, on the other hand, was different. there were a lot of turns in your relationship, but you knew she was trying her best, and you knew you’d do anything for her, and she would do anything for you too. it's just the fact that you get your stubbornness and temper from her.
you knew there was nothing else you could say.
sitting out at the nearby park was your go-to when you felt lost. there was a small breeze with a little drizzle. it was the best weather for a moment like this. in the corner of your eye, you can see your best friend yuji walking up to you with a plastic bag in his hand. you take your headphones off and pause your music.
"y/n, there's no way you’re listening to rosyln." you laugh “what’s wrong with rosyln?" taking the plastic bag that he set down and opened to see if he had some of your favorite snacks. 
“yuji, im moving." you don’t look at him when you say this; you’re too anxious to see how he will react. "i know my brother told me."
what.
his brother, when you hear that, you look up. he's your ex, but before he was your best friend, now you're just strangers who know everything about each other. “what do you mean, how does he know?” “your mom went over and told my mom, and he just happened to be there listening. he told me after i got home from training. i don’t know what happened between you two, but i know he still cares."
weird, why did you guys break up? you couldn’t even seem to remember it. it all happened so fast. the one person who you felt understood you was now nothing. you weren’t even sure if you fully got over him, but you definitely didn’t expect yuji to say he still cared. he definitely didn’t act like it. 
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
i’m so sorry guys😞 deadass as i got my whole idea for this and posted it SCHOOL decided to be funny like i had sats(i hate my score i’m retaking that bitch next year) and then work and then I HAVE A FREAKINF AP EXAM TMR LIKE OMG i didn’t even want to take APLAC they just put me in there☹️☹️yeah and i’ve been traveling too like i’m fr omw back home from michigan🕺might skip school again and go back on wednesday even tho i live like 4hrs away HAHA anyways sorry for the yap session once i finish finals next week for sure i’ll be able to give this more attention love y’all always (i read the new jjk leaks and fell to my knees y’all don’t even understand)
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puppyeared · 1 month
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Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..
#I’m reading volumes 14-16 of the ouran manga OOUGHHH MY HEART#I love this weird little friend group so much its unreal#like u have this charming sweeps you off your feet prince but he’s actually a huge lovable idiot with a kind heart and his friends#who are all misfits that he reached out to and drew in because of his kindness and own weirdness like that shits TIGHT BRO#and the trauma part where he has some deep seated issues with love bc he thinks that itll break a family apart like with his mom#how his family isnt allowed to be together because his mom and dad fell in love and how he says he wants to build a big house#so that way one day everyone will get along as a family like. all he wants is not to lose everyone and the only way to do that is#by maintaining a certain order.. he both wants a complete family so bad and doesnt want anything to sour between anyone#so he assigns each of his friends a family role based on how he sees them and YEAH its mostly played for giggles and tamakis#already weird so its his way of showing theyre close to him but. god damn this boy has LAYERS#it also feels kinda meta towards how found family tends to get thrown around to assign characters as 'siblings' or family roles instead of#using it to describe characters who are close enough to be each others family. cuz tamakis doing that EXACT THING in a way tht#ties in with his character and i have to say its fascinating using that within the story itself and its completely plausible#theres a lot of things i can say about ouran that are good bad and questionable but. god i love it when characters are niceys to each other#i remember i really liked the mall episode bc kyoya and haruhi got to spend time together and their relationship isnt very close#but it was really nice to see their personalities bounce off each other. i think i also wouldve liked to see haruhi alone with kaoru#i also firmly believe all of the hosts are at least a little in love with haruhi and this can be anything like endearing romantic cuz like#who DOESNT love haruhi. kyoya i think would want to study her under a microscope like his fascination with her draws him in#but im fucking obsessed with whatever haruhi and tamaki have going on because YES hes obsessed with her YES he jumps at the chance to#put her in a cute costume but haruhi? she just fucking goes with it because she knows hes fun to be around even if hes a little wacky abt i#theyre all so. NNGGHHHH#ouran#ohshc#yapping
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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☃️
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jorvikzelda · 1 month
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today i had this Vivid memory flash through my mind of kissing my ex boyfriend (this was like 2018) and i felt so viscerally fucking revolted and I gotta say. it is truly impressive that I didn’t realise I’m a lesbian sooner than fucking half a year ago
#z talks#like the misidentifying as ace was Inevitable i think. that was due to repression that realising i didnt like men would not have fixed#(context: id’d as bi ace like. i wanna say 2016/17-2021/22 sometime and then went into ace and Questioning)#remember the time i really solidly settled on being aro because ‘romance has never not felt like a chore and putting on a facade’#babe no thats because your most recent and also singular long term relationship was with a Man#and thats the only one youre looking back on#its so funny how i dated a guy and it was so thoroughly Meh that i just didnt feel like pursuing anything romantic for a very long time#(A REACTION I HAD NOT HAD AFTER MY PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS WITH GIRLS)#And DIDN’T somehow consider that maybe I just Didn’t Like Guys#its nothing i grieve or feel sad about dw its honestly mostly funny to look back on#no wrongs were committed and i dont hold a grudge against the guy it was just me being confused and compheted#(…which is also a weird word to apply because at the time i identified and was out to my friends as a trans guy Binary.#This Was Also Wrong.)#was a weird time man. a truly weird time#anyway. all is well i have now been on 2 dates with a really cute girl and she gave me tulips <3#as part of a Care Delivery bc i had a Migraine and No Painkillers Or Snacks#get well flowers <333333#and now i dream of kissing her under the moonlight#With the uh. Hornetposting lately it May seem unlikely but yes I DO interact with real women! Romantically!#They coexist Wonderfully <3#Anyway. I’m gonna go to bed#Realising that im a lesbian solved all my identity problems including my fucking gender which is just fantastic#I am very happy and whenever I think of being a lesbian it grounds me to reality a little bit stronger and i go yeah. Yeah.
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vilelittlecritter · 1 year
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Me: "I don't like people, I prefer being on my own and not talking"
People: "oh okay we'll leave you be then"
Me: "wait no PLEASE COME BACK I WANT LOVE-"
#its not that i dont like people. its just that i have resorted to avoiding people out of habit and a sense that i make things worse#like its not that i DON'T want to message my friend. its just that I cant bring myself to since i usually dont#ha ha ha. god i am desperate to just speak to people but I want to be left alone and im scared of people turning out to be mean#i kinda feel like crying when i see people say how they love their friends and cuddle up with them and have fun#lol one of my old best friends caused me to have awful anxiety about myself because he judged and made fun of ke constantly#oh yeah and that other time after i broke up with a friend because we stupidly decided to try and date and it didnt go well#the bastard asked the person out that night. they said no because they aren't an ass or dumb. god i should have left him when he said that#oh yeah he also made fun of my sunny cosplay i did and then left me alone in the comic con crowd for half an hour#as someone with anxiety that fucked me up just a little#so yeah bad past friendships and terrible social skills have left me to just go lol cant get hurt if i dont have friends!#ha ha. this is agony.#i have like one actaul friend i talk to and she's going through some stuff and wants to be left alone#which is understandable but now I'm talking to absolutely no one#also even if i were to talk to people i just feel i make things worse#i feel like im obnoxious and weird constantly and I'm sobscsred that people are going to think I'm creepy#its not that im doing anything super weird its just that with my autism I can get overly excited and start rambling and not thinking#yet another reason why I've chosen to stop speaking as much#im also just really snappy sometimes#I remember a while ago someone i was kinda friends with asked me if i was okay and i said i was fine#they kept pushing because they were concerned and no ones ever really done that so i kind of panicked and raised my voice at them#i wasn't angry i just never had someone try and actually pry that deep before other than maybe my parents#they seem like a lovely person but i still feel so horrible for doing that to them#sure i apologises later and they understood but i felt like it was one of the most awful things ive done to someone#i hate even the thought of being cruel or mean and all they were trying to do was help and i snapped at them for it#sorry for being ranty but I'm starting to think im really not okay#I've pondered the idea of possibly having deppression but thats a conversation for my counselor#again sorry for sumoing and ill probably delete this soon#if anyone has read all of this im honestly impressed#personal rambles#vent tag
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goldkirk · 1 year
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#sometimes it really hurts more that they’re well intentioned#and love me and want me to be part of the family still#than if they didn’t try to keep me included at all#like just. it just is rough that they’ll never acknowledge I’m living with a partner and committed#and have been in the relationship for years#they want me to come be a part of things and they want me to be happy and#they send a congrats on your new home card but don’t mention her. they include me in a family vacation jigsaw puzzle but not her even though#i told them I won’t lie to the kids and that she and I are a package deal for family parties and things if we do come into town for them#I can’t stop trying because I’ve seen them be so diffferent with the grandkids than to me on some things#and I’ve seen some of them treating me pretty normal despite everything about their beliefs#but I just#don’t know how many years it’ll take for me to learn to navigate this weird zone#I can’t talk to friends because they don’t understand how good and genuine my family is and only know the parts that hurt me in the past yrs#and I can’t talk to family because they get how good my family is at the heart of things but can’t understand the bad parts enough to#get how half of me wished I could never have to remember any of the good because it’s hard to protect myself if I do#but the line between black and white has to be walked#even if ONLY for my own sake because I have to un train black and white thinking from every area of my worldview#but anyway#it’s just hard. nothing particularly to be done about it. I just need to say it’s hard sometimes#it doesn’t seem to hurt less each time#it’s the same#but I think I’m getting better at not letting it affect my actual daily experience for as long now#idk#it’s hard. it will be for a long time. it’s worth trying anyway.#I know we’re double nope in that we’re queer and we’re not even civil married much less sacramentally married#so we’re in like five separate levels of mortal sin yadda yadda#but I tell you x hurts and you do x again and it sucks. I see you improving in other ways so I have hope but GOD it sucks right now. fuck#shh katie#personal
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daenerys-targaryen · 1 year
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bo0zey · 1 year
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manic mixed depressive episode on my bday is so fun especially when ur going on 2 days no sleep n have a 12hr shift starting at the asscrack of dawn in 6hrs
#idk if i want to sleep like i do but i don’t i just keep walking in circles n staring off blankly#also bursted into tears for no reason bc i missed my mom and remembered how much i hate my fucking birthday#was in the middle of a borderline argument w my family then just zoned out n glanced at the time and tears welled#6:13???#then i pretended to go to the bathroom to hide my tears from my dad cuz he would’ve yelled at me if i went to my room w/o saying anything#so there i am crying like a pathetic loser on the toilet trying to suppress n swallow down ugly sobs#and there i am crying in my dumpster fire of a room on the floor#i literally go the entire year without crying abt her but every time december hits i always get into this weird funk#and idk why it’s still happening it’s been 7 years#i think my subconscious mind is influencing my body to release the trauma stored inside it bc i was never allowed to grieve her properly#so now in blips of time leading up to my birthday and the next day of her passing i’m 15 turning 16 again#i wish i didn’t have to work tomorrow so i could go visit her at her grave instead like i never go to the cemetery but i really want to#i guess i can go on her actual death day but i don’t want to go with my dad and brothers i just want to be alone#they don’t understand the feeling of losing your mom and best friend on your 16th bday#they don’t understand what it’s like carrying all this guilt and trauma and holding her hand and feeling her hand go limp at my words#i told her it was okay she could let go i would take care of my brothers and protect them from my father and i would be strong for everyone#meanwhile i’m listening to my dad n my aunt throwing all her clothes in trash bags upstairs#i didn’t even get to pick out what clothes i wanted to keep of hers im so angry my dad refused to let any of us miss her#“i miss mom-‘ ‘she’s dead get over it!’#i got over it alright but then this time of year rolls around and i’m under it all again#i miss her so much i wonder if she’d be proud of me i wonder what it would be like to feel her hand in mine again#ooos im crying again lol#im so pathetic i’m literally 23 in less than 30 minutes why am i behaving like a crybaby child#23:33 when i was typing that btw n 333 is my angel/life path number lol#i wanna saw my arm off but i won’t#i debated staring an iv on myself instead but i’m too drained i just want lay down n cry lol#pathetic loser crybaby girl can’t function can’t shut up making everyone uncomfortable with her sadnes n tears stupid stupid stupid#drown in them and die nobody here loves you anymore nobody cares you’re the problem always the problem#i can’t remember if my mom loved me or not everyone says she did but i forgot what it feels like#i wish i never told her it was okay to let go i lied to her i said i’d be okay but here i am manic depressive
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todayisafridaynight · 11 months
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What’s the moment in Yakuza that made you go “I’m In.” As in the moment that made you obsessed.
there wasnt ever really one Singular moment that made me go 'ok im obsessed now', it just kinda gradually happened and now here we are almost a year later
#snap chats#it'll be a whole year on wednesday heugh heugh#i really couldnt tell you what it was tho. i guess after i beat y0?#because i remember beating y0 and thinking 'wow this was a great game i wanna see the rest' and wanting to play yk1#i was really depressed that week and i saw the rest of the series was Practically on sale so i was like 'fuck it why not'#that was a good day though. i was still pretty gloomy but it was nice just snacking on pizza i got and playing yk1#i felt like a proper kid for once. even though i was 20 ☠️ but i never got that exp growing up so w/e#god thats so weird though that was a year ago at this point... it doesnt even feel like its been a year#i started y0 years ago but stopped after lee died ☠️ i remember telling myself i really wanted to finish the game but it just didnt happen#well. now it has happened LMAO so glad i finally finished it#its always a coin flip whenever i get into series tbh#ill either love it and become wholly obsessed with it and make a blog for it#or i'll just love it quietly there really is no in between#i had a moment like that with Y7 tho. it was the second ichi started talkin bout dq </3#'snap i thought you said that was the moment you fell in love with ichi' ok and. it was both. loving ichi means loving y7#my initial reactions to y7 are soemthin ill always cherish like of course ive always been invested in the games and the plot#but y7 felt like the first time i was REALLY invested and i was eager to keep playing#not saying the other games /werent/ interesting ofc but like. with y7 it as just different#also because y7 was the first and only rgg game i showed my friend (we only got to chapter 2 before she just. stopped acting like i existed#plus before she went home we were driving to get sushi and i was just asking her how she felt bout the game so far#and yk she gave reasonable answers and even started theorizing (she was totally right about arakawa not actually trying to kill ichi)#but then we just sat in my car in silence for a sec before i was just like '..so what'd you think bout jo' because im Not Subtle#and she was really on my same bullshit wavelength immediately and we just spent the rest of the car ride talking about him LVKJAELKJ#i was so glad she ALSO 'Really Liked Him' frame one vVLKAV#its always funny whenever we find the same characters attractive like. it happened once in a blue moon cause our tastes are Just Different#but when we would agree it was the funniest shit we were such goons- I REMEMBER WE MADE A HOT-OR-NOT TIER LIST ONCE LVKJVKLA#we're so unserious about it because generally we just. Arent attracted to people that much so when it does happen Lmao#i miss it. i miss having a friend to play games with.. i miss having a friend to hang out with in general tbh i miss being silly (;´д`)#IVE RAMBLED ON SO LONG SORRY IM RUNNING OUT OF TAGS but yeah. there's That answer
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#*problems occur on a project multiple ppl r working on* my boss @ me: what do u wanna do?#me. disastrously burnt out: i couldnt not even to give a fuck abt all this. i dont care i dont care i dont care#but thats not what i say. i say ok ill talk to the ppl and see how i can drop everything to help. and that probably means driving an hour#away to the other uni which is irrationally terrifying to me to the point where it will probably destroy my whole week a prevent me from#sleeping when i already am struggling to sleep. but its fine. ill get it done and itll be fine. for this stupid fucking project i dont#care abt. ay its so weird. ive never been this angry abt things. i mean its not even really anger its more dispair and frustration but it#manifests as just wanting to scream and throw a fit like a toddler. and i mean its my fault. i dont have to live the way that i do. i mean#i do but in an irrational compulsive way that i cant entirely control. but like its Saturday and i sepent 6 and a half hours taking#measurements and then met with my boss for like an hour and she was showing me cool imagines and talking abt cool new collaborators at her#new school and im just sitting there trying to maintain a smile bc my brain is semi disconnected from my body and im so exhausted#ugh. my brain is so fucked rn. i dont want to drive with even lower functioning thsn usual. and i was gonna meet my friend Tuesday morning#for once. and i might have to drive back and forth multiple days. ans what's my reward if were successful? two fucking weeks of watering#and measurement taking and i might have to stand around other ppl in all that time as well. usually im off spinning in circles by myself#amd looking unapproachable. i dont want to have to b a person around the undergrads#god im so weird. its like from the outside perspective if u were looking thru the window at me u would see me using a hammer and assume im#putting something together and i am but im also hammering nails thru my hand which no one asked me to do#so then why do i have to do it? ugh. thats y its a hard thing to complain abt bc ppl r like oh it sounds like ur compulsive habbits make u#productive and successful and yea sure but they're also destroying my life. im laying on the floor doubled over in pain and ppl r like oh#look how useful u r. who gives a fuck everything feels stretched and distorted like im suffering some sort of selfimposed Devin punishment#whatever. fuck this. tomorrow ill try my hardest to relax. literally i cant remember the last time i stayed in bed until at least 7am. ugh#but i also have some bullshit i have to get done tomorrow so well see#uuuuuugh let me leave this place @ schools send me ur official offers pls i wanna plan out my life for the next 5yrs#unrelated
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cats-in-the-clouds · 1 year
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it’s all been said before but the whole pronouns thing for some people is getting so ridiculous it’s honestly just sad
#just saw a TIF post ‘i’ve decided that in addition to he/they i am now interested in ‘he/they/she. but just as a spicy little extra#only on rare occasion for fun. but please don’t ONLY use she/her for me if you use that please switch it up from time to time!’#like girl can’t you see how meaningless this all is. it’s a consumerist hobby to you it’s a game of playing with masks for fun#it’s literally just about playing pretend and getting excited when your friends play along. it’s a bit#but actors get uncomfortable when the topic lingers on the truth for too long. they’re cool with dancing around it sometimes#but they don’t like being unmasked openly because they don’t like their true selves they like having a persona#this whole trans thing is so insanely dangerous people are straight up encouraging personality disorder type behavior#or like. when people who ‘use multiple pronoun sets’ post stuff like ‘i wish people would actually bother to switch it up sometimes#or use he or she instead of always just they :/‘ like yeah people are avoiding saying anything real because they’re afraid of upsetting you#and catching you on a bad day where that’s not right#or like. they’d prefer a consistent approach to language at the very least instead of fulfilling your ever-changing fantasies#because you can’t make up your mind because you always need more and more attention and can’t just be satisfied with yourself#literally i can remember my own experience with this thing wasn’t ‘maybe i’m actually not a girl’ (this is almost never it)#it was ‘maybe it would be fun to go she/they and put a non-binary flag in my icon and reblog all these cool posts about being trans’#’it looks like it would be a lot of fun to get in on this cool thing and be someone special and have a secret identity in real life’#it is so much fun to play pretend. and it is so damaging to act like these intrusive thoughts actually mean anything about your gender#bc when you spend too much time on the internet and start entertaining the idea of being someone else#it starts to feel weird when people irl refer to you as who you are with all relevant gendered language#dysphoria is being manufactured by overthinking about things while having ideas flow into your mind by a constant social media stream#for a whole generation of people online it is almost never an actual natural thing
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katnissgirlsmakedo · 2 years
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i know that’s it’s because people who write gay fanfiction are like. atheists who don’t believe in heaven or afterlife. but i think the reason all post finale resurrection merlin fanfiction sucks is because everybody always freezes arthur in time. and i have beef with that.
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britneyshakespeare · 2 years
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You know last week before my night class started I was chatting with this girl who sat across from me and mentioned how I was tired and could really use a cup of coffee and she goes "oh, so I guess coffee is your spirit animal?"
And I was like... no... no not really...
#she recited a few other internet one-liners to graze over it but it was weird#text post#tales from diana#not that these are at all comparable bc they're very different in nature but#kaily and i were having a conversation yesterday abt how it feels all the sudden as a white person when another white friend suddenly drops#like the ironic n-word in front of you out of nowhere. probably just to be funny most of the time.#im always like. HUH???? DO YOU EXPECT ME TO LAUGH RIGHT NOW????#i call it out as gross but it's always unexpected and disappointing.#like not only would you use that word so brazenly. but you expect me to giggle nd laugh along and validate it? NOT the case whatsoever dude#the spirit animal thing is a different form of casual racism bc a lot of ppl don't truly know wtf a spirit animal is#they just think the words sound funny together. it's a form of hyperbole to say x is your spirit animal#especially if it's not an animal???#remember when directioners would always joke niall was their spirit animal... *shivers*#to get back to the n word thing briefly bc i had one more thing to say#one of my friends i made recently had to drop a lot of toxic cishet white guy friends#she's a black queer latina immigrant who kinda had a tendency to want to befriend ppl she was afraid could hurt her#i didn't see this happen in front of me. but apparently they'd drop casual n words EVEN W THE HARD R in front of her and like#look to her for approval?!?!?!?!?#and she told me 'i feel bad bc they probably don't know better' (& she was naturally also very afraid of seeming 'angry' @ them)#& i was like. oh no girl. like. there's a lot of shit white guys don't know & won't teach themselves#like a lot a lot. that's not one of them though.#even if you're a white kid who grew up in a 97% white suburb (like me) you heard growing up not to use that word bc it's offensive#men who are like 30 years old and working in a multicultural educational system heavily frequented by immigrants... they SHOULD know better#that they somehow don't is embarrassing AT BEST but i know those guys & they're actually racist#that was a few months ago though since she dropped them (it was their own fault... i didn't tell her what to do but they caused this drama)#(no need to explain but someone was a COMPLETE jerk and ran away w no apologies... fuck that guy)#ive really enjoyed getting to know her and the other night she sent me a message abt how she really feels loved and accepted#by me :) and kaily and a few other ppl ive introduced her to. she's had a terrible history w friendships & relationships in this country#that made me feel very warm bc i really do love her she's a fun person to be around and talk to. we have a lot of common interests#yeah. rant turns to wholesome story in the tags to start your morning.
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pussy-ache · 6 months
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the funny part is that none of this would have happened if he had listened to me and not treated me so special lmao
#what was the point of all the rules if we're just gonna throw em out the window#there was LITERALLY a rule about jealousy lmaoo and i remember very clearly laughing @ it at the time#cuz i know jealousy. i've lived in jealousy. you can't control jealousy by making a rule that's like nO jEaLoUsy!11!1!#the only thing that stops jealousy is truly. simply. cutting it the fuck out and letting it go#if you're able to be happy for someone in a real way jealousy cannot foster -- if you fake it jealousy will follow. it's simple but it's no#then there was a long conversation after that. i was trapped in that bar with them for like 5 HOURS talking this through#like babe. babe. you literally said yourself that you don't want it to end. so figure it out and get back to me. like what#i'm not being trapped in another meeting again and i'm not attending anymore weird ass functions where i'm being appraised#absolutely nothing has changed since i had last seen her besides the number of tattoos i have#which she also commented on in a weird way and i bit my tongue so bad.#i will say that biting my tongue and refraining from mentioning how much he liked my tattoos and which ones are his favorite made it click#the second i decide that i don't like the person i'm becoming or have become because of this will be when i choose to leave#if it doesn't end on their terms prior#the fact that i only thought of saying that for a split second and then OVERWHELMINGLY decided against it means i am still Me#and i haven't been compromised by it yet#i think it was an (understandable) projection of an insecurity because i know she knows he likes them#but i could have said it. maybe a lesser person would have. also maybe don't comment on another persons body#i miss the years of this when it WASN'T a big deal and it just came and went. like this was so simple for so long#it's wild to me that the entire thing could end#because she threw a fit like a child like i heard the details and i'm on her friends side lmaooo treat him better please#i've been observing these patterns of behavior for a while and they're clearly in love with each other#but only fall together once a year. i find that interesting#i think it shows a weird commitment on her end cuz her husband travels and she could theoretically fuck her best friend whenever she wanted#but she stays loyal and only stays within the confines of the agreement itself and i've always liked that#although i wonder if that's cuz she's afraid to commit to her friend in case the friendship is compromised#psychologically i've always found this whole thing fascinating and there's a part of me that loves it simply because of that#i like observing patterns of behavior especially when it comes to love/sexuality and how it's expressed#this is lowkey a little experiment for me and always has been. the ethics behind it are questionable and i know this#which is why it's up to them to clearly communicate with me when they're ready to draw the line. i have no personal stake in this.#i can't decide for them that enough is enough. i'm not doing that to him tbh. i care about him too much to not hear out a resolution first
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euniexenoblade · 3 months
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since we're talking about call outs lately, i've been called out many times, most of which are made from lies and sometimes by altering screenshots, but the most effective call out i ever got was like, in early 2015 there was a tumblr user everyone knew was a terf, but she would say "actually i support trans women" this was before crypto terfs were as talked about so the language wasn't really there to say "hey this person is a crypto terf." but yeah some people put posts of this woman on my dash and i made a random post on my blog "why do yall reblog her shes a terf" and of course she searches her own name daily, found my post, and replied to it that me calling her a terf was racist. that was it. no other interaction. but she went on all night talking about me being racist and just making things up as she went "oh i bet she says the n word all the time irl" kind of shit that had, like no basis? But her follower base took it 100% and i literally had thousands of anons telling me to kill myself, trying to goad me into being racist (didnt work), and the most concerning thing was i got hundreds of anons being like "what was the point of doing hrt if you still look like that, you should kill yourself." It was like, violent and overwhelming. and on top of it I'd get random young teenager trans people who followed her and bought into her bioessentialism showing up in my messages being like "you give trans people a bad name" "you're why transphobia exists" etc etc it was fucking crazy.
but i lost like, no followers because everyone around me understood, this woman was a terf. this all set up the real one though.
later in the year a teenage "communist" trans girl made some snarky comment about me being racist on a post of mine blowing up. i ignored her cuz like, who cares it's just some random teenager. but i guess people were looking for a reason to hate me cuz that blew up, lots of people just took that at face value no need to investigate. when someone finally did send the girl an ask being like "hey how is she racist" she replied "I dont remember but I know she is" and even more people just took this as 100%. the thing is, i do remember her being one of those "you make trans people look bad" terf following young trans people, it's not that she didn't remember, it's that she didnt want to admit she followed a terf and she believed a terf just saying shit. I lost like 3/4s of my followers, i had a lot of people i thought were my friends just stop talking to me, and going forward every time i got a call out there would usually be a line of like "also she's racist, everyone already knows this" all cuz this girl needed to make a snarky comment cuz she just loves terfs.
the thing about the "i dont remember" bit is it made some weird game of telephone. "I dont remember" became "oh she's racist, i think she says the n word" which became "she called black bloggers the n word" like people just made shit up about me and connected it to this call out. and when id be like this isnt true id be met with a "this is just known, youre a known racist" and it's like, to this day i will still find people be like "hey good on you for growing as a person and not doing that any more" and its like I NEVER DID IT TO BEGIN WITH
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