#and i'm not sure why the sentiment that they can't take it but she can surprises anyone

[homielander]

shiv's motivations for voting to pass the gojo deal are so layered and i don't think they should be dismissed in favour of any one interpretation. shiv desperately grabbed on to a lifeline for her relationship with tom. shiv was the deciding vote and she couldn't bear to hold the crown only for a moment just to place it atop her brother's head. shiv knew she would have more influence as wife of CEO rather than sister of CEO. shiv absolutely hated seeing kendall crystallize into logan before her eyes, especially when he made roman bleed ("and if we did kill him we get to go to bed") -- succession has always been about siblings so of course she tried to free her brothers before her child. shiv still thinks she can raise her child with all the material benefits of being the daughter of waystar CEO while doing better by her, whatever that means. and all of those things are true

[lecsainz]

stuck in the elevator

pairings: charles leclerc x fem!reader

warnings: Y/N freaking out and charles being a sweetheart, the elevator breaking down, cute french nicknames.

authors note: [SOMETHING COOL] because i really have no idea what to write here today 😭

word count: 1.1K

Charles Leclerc was in Miami for the Grand Prix, but he had to take a break from the busy atmosphere and have a moment to himself. He decided to take the elevator up to his hotel room when he saw a girl in there with him. He was on the phone and didn't pay much attention to her until the elevator suddenly shook, causing Y/N to stumble. The girl, Y/N, immediately started to panic, saying things like "I can't die yet" and "I have so much to live for". Charles found it amusing, but he knew he needed to comfort her.

"I think we're stuck," Charles replied, his eyes scanning the elevator buttons.

"What do you mean we're stuck? We can't be stuck!" Y/N started to panic.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Charles said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "We'll get out of here soon enough."

"But what if we don't? What if we're stuck in here forever?" Y/N asked, her voice shaking.

Charles couldn't help but chuckle. "Trust me, we won't be stuck in here forever. And even if we were, I don't think spending eternity with you would be so bad."

Y/N blushed at his words, and Charles couldn't help but smile at her reaction.

They spent the next few minutes trying to press the emergency button and asking for help, but there was no response.

Charles leaned against the wall, "Well, looks like we're stuck here for a while."

Y/N groaned, "Great. Just my luck."

Charles looked at Y/N, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Well, ma chérie, I guess we'll have to find a way to pass the time then." he said, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.

Y/N couldn't help but feel a shiver run down her spine at the sound of Charles' french.

Y/N arched an eyebrow, curious. "And what did you have in mind?" she asked.

Charles stepped closer, his hand reaching out to brush a stray lock of hair out of her face. "I was thinking we could get to know each other a little better." he said, his voice low and seductive. Y/N couldn't help but smile.

"So, Miami, huh?" Charles asked, leaning against the wall of the elevator with a curious expression.

Y/N nodded, "Yeah, I heard the Grand Prix is amazing, and I've never been to Miami before, so I figured why not?"

"Do you like formula one?" he asked surprised.

Y/N nodded. "Yeah, I do."

Charles' face lit up. "That's great! Do you have a favorite team?"

Y/N grinned mischievously. "I'm a Mercedes fan. I mean, have you seen Toto Wolff? He's a total babe."

Charles feigned offense, putting a hand over his heart. "Hey now, I'm a Ferrari driver. You're not supposed to like our rivals."

Y/N laughed. "Well, I can't help it. But I think your charming french accent could make me change my mind." Charles smiled smugly at the compliment.

"Well, I appreciate the sentiment. Maybe I can even convince you to switch over to Team Ferrari." He teased, his eyes sparkling.

Y/N raised an eyebrow, feigning consideration. "Hmm, I don't know. I mean, I don't think anyone can replace Toto in my heart." Charles laughed, shaking his head.

They sat in silence for a few moments before he spoke up again, "You know, there's something about being stuck in an elevator that's kind of romantic."

Y/N raised an eyebrow, "Really? I'm not feeling it."

Charles grinned, "Well, just imagine it. Two people, alone in a confined space, forced to confront their feelings."

Y/N rolled her eyes, "Oh please. There are no feelings here."

Charles chuckled, "Are you sure about that, ma chérie? I mean, you did say my french accent was charming."

Y/N's cheeks turned red, "I did not!"

They fell into a comfortable silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Charles picked up his phone and began scrolling through his photos.

"You know, I have some amazing pictures from Monaco," he said, showing Y/N a photo of himself overlooking the harbor.

Y/N leaned over to get a better look, her arm brushing against his. She quickly pulled away, but Charles didn't seem to mind.

"It's beautiful." she said, admiring the photo.

"It's my hometown. I was born and raised there." Charles replied with a smile.

S/N's eyes widened in surprise. "Really? I had no idea."

"Yeah, it's a special place for me." Charles said, his gaze lingering on Y/N.

As hours passed and they were still stuck in the elevator, Charles and Y/N talked about everything and nothing. They discussed their favorite movies, their dream travel destinations, and even shared childhood stories.

Charles found himself enjoying Y/N's company more and more as they talked. She was funny, intelligent, and had a unique perspective on life that he found refreshing. As the hours dragged on, they joked and laughed together, forgetting about the chaos of being stuck in an elevator.

At some point, exhaustion caught up with Y/N and she dozed off, her head resting on Charles' shoulder. He couldn't help but smile at the sight of her sleeping peacefully, her breaths steady and calm.

He brushed a stray strand of hair from her face and whispered, "Tu es tellement belle*." *you are so beautiful

When they finally got out of the elevator, Y/N woke up from her nap on Charles' shoulder, she felt a bit embarrassed but also grateful for his comfort during their ordeal in the elevator. She looked up at him and smiled.

"Thank you so much for being there for me, Charles. I don't know what I would have done without you," she said.

Charles smiled back at her. "Of course, Y/N. I'm just glad I could be of help. And who knows, maybe we can find ourselves stuck in an elevator again sometime soon," he teased.

Y/N laughed. "I think once was enough for me, but I wouldn't mind seeing you again outside of an elevator."

Charles watched Y/N walk away, feeling a sudden pang of regret. He realized that they hadn't exchanged numbers or made any plans to meet up again. He mentally scolded himself for being so caught up in the moment and not thinking ahead.

"*Merde." he muttered to himself. "I can't believe I forgot to ask for her number."*shit

But he wasn't about to give up that easily. He made a mental note to try and find her at the Grand Prix later that day, hoping to get a second chance to make things right.

As he walked away, he couldn't shake the feeling that Y/N had left a lasting impression on him. He knew he had to see her again.

[vitospaghetta]

Leon's flirting in Infinite Darkness

This scene has, since day one, been one of my favorites in Infinite Darkness. The series did an excellent job at bringing a lot of aspects of Leon's character to the surface. Things we were already very familiar with, like his kind and attentive nature, but also darker aspects of his character he generally tends to keep hidden, such as his anger, his resentment, and the extent of his trauma regarding Raccoon City. What I love about this scene is that it is also a prime example of one of those darker aspects of Leon's character. One that is integral to understanding who he is as a person — his desperation.

I've seen the idea of his flirtation with Shen Mei in this scene being interpreted as platonic become popularized. For some people, choosing to ignore what is being presented here is easier than accepting that Leon S. Kennedy would ever be okay with going on a date with someone already in an established relationship. Though I think that idea discredits the deeply human sentiment present in this scene. As morally objectionable as Leon's actions are here, there's something incredibly authentic about them. Unknowingly, he's disclosing his desires, and not just sexual ones.

It's very clear that Leon is asking her out to dinner with romantic intent. This comes down to my own personal life experience, but I've come to understand this as a universal truth: when a man you hardly know asks you to do anything with him, it's a date. He is asking you out romantically, guaranteed. In the case of Leon in this scene, when you take the context of Shen Mei being in a relationship and Leon's lifestyle into account, you can paint a clear picture of him not only asking Shen Mei out on a date, but he's doing so to get his foot in the door, so-to-speak.

He's not looking for longevity, he's doing this with the sole intention of sleeping with her. That's why he disregards her relationship — approaches this with a shameless 'I'm willing to be the mistake she makes at least once' mentality — because he's not looking for a relationship. He's desperately yearning for pleasure; for the burdens of his life to melt away, even if the moment is fleeting. Even if it comes at the cost of someone else's relationship. An act of selfishness — something we don't often see from Leon — but desperation has a way of making people act impulsively. I think this speaks volumes about his character.

Leon lives a life that doesn't allow for him to be able to settle down. Given how compassionate and empathetic he is, he more-than-likely views relationships as impractical at best. He'd constantly feel like his happiness would come at the cost of his partner's, and that's not something he could live with, so he submits to loneliness. It's practical, it's fair, and it's the only option that makes sense given his career. A long-term committal relationship is just another opportunity his service to the government has taken from him, and while he can have it, he will not willingly drag someone else into a relationship that would surely be filled with disappointment to do so.

So instead, he seeks momentary pleasure. He flirts with women like Shen Mei and Hunnigan while on duty. He self-sabotages by pursuing emotionally unavailable women like Ada. One could argue that flirting with Shen Mei and Hunnigan are also him self-sabotaging, as they are also women that are most-likely going to reject him due to the professional nature of their relationship. He's going out of his way to avoid genuine connection, and therein lies the tragedy of it all.

At the end of the day, he craves normalcy. He yearns for a life he can't have and deeply resents being denied it. Moments like this are just displaying how Leon navigates the circumstances of his life, actively denying himself a happiness he is so deserving of, but deems as unfair to others. He wants to feel needed and appreciated in a way that makes him feel like anything other than a weapon pointed at the government's problems — to feel loved, in the most intrinsically human way possible, even if it's only for one night with someone and ultimately means nothing in the end.

This moment perfectly encapsulates something that has always been a crucial component of Leon's character, the extent of his tragedy — the lonely and isolating nature of a life he didn't choose.

[surielstea]

Ballroom Secrets (pt. 11)

Based on this request.

Read pt.I here.

Pairing: Eris x Fem!Reader

Summary: Cassian finds out about readers secret relationship with the High Lord of Autumn.

Warning: Angst | Slight description of depression | hurt/comfort | happy ending

5.6k words

A/N: Sorry this is so long 😭😭 I just really wanted to get the angst right so it got long quick, hope you enjoy! :)

I sat in the sitting room of the river house cuddled up next to Morrigan who was splitting a bottle of wine with me.

"Where'd you get this?" Mor asks, pinching the silk of my new dress between her hands. "Oh I'm not sure, it was a gift." I smile, remembering the way Eris handed it to me for no particular reason other than the fact that he wanted to take it off of me. "From who?" Feyre asks in her own chair, Rhysand standing beside her, leaning against the arm rest. My mouth goes dry.

"It's a male, look at the way she's blushing." Azriel hummed, leaning back against the wall. I cast him a glare but he only returns it with a soft smile. "The same male that gave you this?" Mor points to my neck. "Gave her what?" Cassian perks up from his sprawled out position on the couch, Nesta's feet in his lap. "Yeah, what?" I look to Mor confused. "A hickey." A smirk curves her lips and I slap my hand over where the mark lies.

"By who?" Nesta sits up, gods even she was interested. "No one, I don't know— just some guy." I stumble over my words, cursing myself for my horrible lie. Azriel nearly laughs and rightfully so, his shadows were probably picking up on every nerve that tensed in my body.

"Is that why you've been missing training?" Cassian raised a brow and I can't will the words to leave my mouth. I've always been a horrible liar, Eris has tried to teach me his ways of deceit but it was no use when every time I tried to be quick witted or malevolent it failed miserably and I made a fool of myself. "I've been missing training because you schedule it for the asscrack of dawn." I grumble, half truths however were my forte. Cassian narrows his eyes on me and I swallow thickly. "Oh leave her alone already, let the girl have her fun." Amren speaks up and I silently thank every god I can think of. "Cauldron knows she's had the three of you Illyrians hovering over her shoulder since she was born." The eldest of us finalizes and the conversation thankfully ends there.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

I was in the middle of reading a novel in my bedroom of the river house when a note fluttered down onto my chest, appearing from thin air. A soft smile comes to my lips as I close the book and pick up the note, recognizing the handwriting immediately.

Will you be home soon?

I twist my lips to the side and dwell over the question before flipping on my side to grab a pen from my nightstand. I quickly write back and watch the note disappear from my hands.

I'm waiting for everyone to fall asleep, we're all night owls evidently.

It takes only a minute for him to reply and the words on the paper make me audibly giggle.

Drug them. I miss you, and I'm tired.

Can't sleep without me?

Apparently not. I smile widely at the sentiment. I'll leave soon, just for you.

Soon isn't soon enough

I roll my eyes at his childish impatience but a smile forms over my face as I write out my retort.

Shut your whining up, I'm trying to read

You're so mean to me (I like it)

I don't write back, deciding that if I say anything else he might winnow here himself just to take me back, which wouldn't be good. I opened my book back up but as soon as I was getting back into the story there was a knock at my door. I sigh and use Eris' note as a bookmark before shutting it. "Come in." I call, sitting up.

Cassian enters, taking up the whole entry way as he shuts the door behind him. I smile at my brother as he looks to me with his warm hazel eyes. "I thought you were going to bed?" He creases his brows skeptically and I roll my eyes. "I say that, and then I read my romance novels." I lift up my book and it was his turn to roll his eyes, taking a seat on my bed.

Cassian isn't my brother by blood, but he might as well be. I can't remember a time when he wasn't taking care of me. When he was only seven years old he offered me shelter in his tent. I was six and lost, my parents deserting me, or so I presumed. He tucked me under his wing and shielded me from the rain until arriving back to the tent. He snuck me food from Windhaven and even stole maids clothes off of laundry lines. If it weren't for him I most likely wouldn't be alive today, ever since then he's been particularly protective of me, even towards friends from other courts. I wasn't Illyrian either, but he always said I acted like one. Perhaps that was an insult, but I took it as a compliment.

"What's up?" I shift in my bed so my legs dangle over the side and he's right beside me. "We haven't talked in awhile, I miss you." It was true. It feels like it's been months since it's been just him and I. Realization dawns upon me that all of my free time has gone to Eris, he's my mate sure, but that doesn't mean I want to leave the rest of my family in the past.

"I know. I'm sorry." I lean my head on his shoulder. "I've been busy." I murmur, fiddling with my hands.

"Alright, Who's the lucky guy— or gal, I don't discriminate." He hums and my heart drops. Gods I did not want to expose my relationship with Eris right now. Not ever. "Can we not talk about this right now?" I say, my voice gentle and pleading. "C'mon, you used to tell me everything." He groans and I lift my head from his shoulder, my hands coming to my knees to stop from fidgeting. "This is different." I shrug.

"How so?"

His question is met with silence, I was weighing whether or not I should just kick him out and tell him I'm tired. He'd leave if I asked. But I didn't want him to, just didn't want to talk about this.

"I'd like to meet who's got my sister glowing like this." He bumps my side with his. "Doubt it." I grumble, then curse myself for letting that slip. "What's that supposed to mean?" He snorts a laugh and I look at him nervously, gripping my knees tighter as his smile slowly drops. "I've met him?" He arches a brow and all I can do is slowly nod. Is this it? All that sneaking around summing up to this very moment? "Do I like this guy?" He guesses like this is a game and the health of our friendship isn't in my hands. "Not really, no." I answer honestly, lying is impossible and staying silent will only cause his thoughts to drive him mad.

"Well if he's got you this happy, I'm willing to reevaluate." He shrugs, carefree. He clearly doesn't understand the situation. "It's not that simple." I shake my head, looking away from him and back to my lap. "Talk to me, I won't judge." He reaches over, placing his calloused hand on my clenched ones. "Promise." He gives them a reassuring squeeze. A pit forms in my stomach. My nails dig into the skin of my knees and he understands, pulling his hand away. My eyes widen and I can only pray he doesn't hate me for this.

"Before I tell you, try not to be too mad okay?" I crease my brows, swallowing thickly and looking to him. "Uh, okay?" He looks at me foolishly. "I'm serious." I stress with wide eyes. "Okay, okay, I won't be mad." He promises and I force myself to take a deep breath. This truth that I've been hiding for nearly a year now about to be exposed. All because I forgot to glamour a fucking hickey on my neck. Gods how could I have been so stupid?

I realize the quiet has been dragging on for far too long and that if I don't tell him now I never will.

"Eris."

Silence. He doesn't make a sound and he doesn't move. A weight lifts from my shoulders and for a second it's bliss. "What?" His voice lacks emotion and a new weight envelopes me. Fuck. "Eris is the male I've been secretly seeing." It comes out in a pitiful whisper. "Are you mad?" I was quick to ask, but he doesn't reply for a long moment. Allowing me to think of everything I've done. All that I've risked just to be with my mate, to be happy.

"Please tell me you're talking about another Eris." He tries to remain calm but I can hear it, the quiver of his voice, the clenching of his fists. I shake my head no and I swore I could feel the heat radiating off of him, pure anger. "You promised you wouldn't be mad!" I stand to look at him, a fire in his eyes that is pure rage.

"Well that was before you let that bastard into your bed." He stands and my neck cranes up to keep eye contact, the power dynamics making my legs wobble. Gods I felt useless.

"It's not like that—" I try to defend but he doesn't let me finish. "What? Don't tell me you think he's in love with you?" He scoffs like it's the most improbable thing on the continent. Tears well in my eyes at the idea. "You don't know him." I defend. "I don't want to, for all I know he's probably using you for a good fuck—" He starts. "Stop it." I demand and he clamps his mouth shut. "He's better than you think." I will my voice not to break. "Has he brainwashed you? You can't be serious." He nearly laughed at the idea. I don't say anything, allowing him to get his anger out before I plead my case.

"Or have you forgotten what he's done to Morrigan?" A shutter racks through me and I can't bring myself to look him in the eyes. "That story isn't true." I rasped but I doubt he hears me. I must sound insane to him. "Do you know who his parents are? How you'll be treated if you ever married him?" He goes on but it's not true, none of what he says is true. "You'll be a fucking brood mare, forced to give sons over and over again. Do you understand that?" His hand comes to my shoulders, squeezing tightly. "He's not Beron. We've talked about it, he doesn't even want kids unless I'm willing to give that to him." My words are just above a whisper and he lets go of my shoulders like he's repulsed, as if I hold a virus and he doesn't want to get infected.

"It doesn't matter. Eventually you become parents." He whispered. "You really believe that? Tell that to Rhys. To Morrigan, or Azriel. Tell that to fucking Nesta." I grit out, whipping my head up to look at him and his hypocritical statements. I allow him to see the fury in my eyes, the tears streaming down my cheeks. "Leave her out of this." He narrows his eyes on me.

The first argument to this level we ever had was over his mate. I hated her, loathed every part of her and what she made my brother go through— and now she's one of my most trusted friends and one of my favorite people. A laugh escapes from my body. I must've looked crazy finding amusement at a time like this. "It's the same thing." I bring my hands up to wipe my tears. "Gods were so fucking predictable." I sigh out. He looks at me confused, eyes analyzing my body language. "Nesta is just like him, and you know it." I narrow my brows at him. "This is different." He clenches his fists at his sides. "How so? Give me one good reason as to how this is different?" I will him. "Eris hurt Mor." He says the crime like it's dirt in his mouth. "Nesta hurt Feyre." I reason with him. He grits his teeth. "He hates Illyrians. He hates you and I because of where we come from, do you understand how fucked that is?" His hands come to my wrists, as if pleading me to listen.

"His father hates Illyrians." I correct. "And stop saying I'm an Illyrian I'm not." I pull at his grip but it's iron. "Fine. But he hates me, are you picking sides right now?" His brows crease like I've betrayed him. "No! I—" My breath gets caught halfway up my throat. "I don't want to pick sides, I want both." Tears continue falling and I don't bother wiping them away anymore. "And Nesta hated the Fae entirely, don't be so certain that makes them different." I seethe out at him and he narrows his eyes at me. "We're mates. Nesta and I are cauldron willed, you can't ignore something like that." He says and I stare at him unwavering, not bothering to say anything but rather dropping my glamour around the mating bond connected straight to the high lord of Autumn.

His eyes widen and his grip on my wrists loosens but I don't pull away. "No," His voice is a whisper. I nod. "Reject the bond, you deserve better than him I don't care if you love him." He rules. "I already accepted it, nearly half a year ago." I expose. If I was going to be honest I might as well lay it all out. "Half a year?" He rasps and I nod gravely. "You've been lying to me for half of a fucking year?" His tone is louder, more angry. "I don't understand why you care so deeply, I gave you my reasons now leave it alone." I match his lever of voice. "Why I care? I've always cared, you're my family—" He begins and I tear my wrists from his grasp. "You're not even my real brother!" I yell at him and I swore the world stopped spinning. Pain flashes across his eyes and he stumbles back, his mouth falling open before he clamps it shut and swallows thickly.

"Cass I didn't—" I try. "No." He looks at me like he's never seen me before. "You've made your point clear." He walks to the door. Every fiber of my being wants to beg him to stay. But my feet can't move and I stare aimlessly as he leaves, the door clicking shut with a gut wrenching softness. Leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I use whatever remaining energy I have left to winnow back to my apartment. Where I knew Eris impatiently waited for me to return. I land wobbly on my feet, tears slowly cascading from the wells of my eyes. Eris who was laid on the couch with a book sat up alarmed. I remove the walls around our bond and allow the misery that overwhelmed me to flood into his end of our connection.

He rushes toward me alarmed, fire raging in his eyes but not toward me, toward whoever made me feel this way. "Eris," I murmur, I was sure I was going to collapse. "My love," He brings a hand to my waist, keeping me steady but that didn't stop a choked sob from escaping me. "What's wrong?" His other hand comes to my cheek, wiping away my tears. "Talk to me." His brows crease and this feels so wrong, seeking comfort in the very reason Cassian is mad at me in the first place.

"He knows." I whisper. "Who knows?" His brows crease in confusion, before they relax with realization. I grip his shirt in my fists, looking up at him like a lost animal. "I'm a horrible sister." I confess, my voice breaking on the final word. "No," He shakes his head, pulling me into his chest, holding me close and warming me up. "No love, don't say that." He whispered into my hair, his arms tight around me.

Another sob racks through me but he doesn't shush me, he allows the dam of tears to break and every emotion I've kept bottled up for the past half year comes flowing out.

I tell him everything. From the moment Mor noticed the hickey to the point when Cassian left my bedroom. My voice shook when telling him of what I said to my brother. "And now I'm here and, and I don't know what to do." I sobbed, looking up at him as he ran a hand through the ends of my hair. "I see." His voice is soft, caring. "I was so mad, I wasn't thinking and with all the words he said about you I just— I hated him at that moment." I cup my mouth at the realization. I never wanted to hate anyone, especially not someone I love so much. I never want to feel that uncontrollable emotion ever again.

"It's not your fault." He stresses. "We'll figure this out together alright?" His thumb traces along my cheek and I nod, blinking away my final tears. "But what if he never wants to talk to me again?" I whisper. "What if he hates me?" My lip quivers at the thoughts, I don’t know how I’d live with myself if Cassian ever hated me. "Your brother loves you too much to ever consider that. Alright?" His hands grip my face slightly as if to stress his point and I nod meekly, slipping my hands around his waist again and hugging him tightly.

He releases a deep sigh and hugs me back, his touch warming my skin in a way that comforted me more than he could ever know. In the hug I begin to wonder how he feels about the world knowing. I hoped he knew how much he’s helping me, how much I appreciated that he’s here for me. Then I realized that he might be thinking of leaving for my benefit, so I can return to Cassian and tell him everything he said about Eris was right and I can stay with my family. I didn’t want that. Gods, why can’t I have both? The cauldron must’ve been playing a cruel joke on me. "Please, don't leave." I beg of him. He bends down and places a hard kiss to the temple of my head. "Never." But he would, if I asked.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

The next few days were long. I barely slept, every time I tried I'd be reminded of the words I spat at Cassian. I couldn't face him, didn't dare go back to the River House, much less the House of Wind. I stayed in bed, staring out the window of my bedroom, watching the sunset shining against the Sidra, the water refracting in rainbows as stars awakened in the sky. Another day passes.

I felt hollow, my limbs heavy and my stomach a pit. I knew I'd have to face Cassian soon, see him and the others. I wonder if he told them, warned them all to no longer speak to me. All because of who I'm in love with. Anger consumed me for a few days, thinking him deserving for what I said. Who was he to pick who I can and cannot love? I spent hours cursing him as a hypocritical bastard, spewing lies to convince myself I was in the right.

I slowly came to, deciding I needed to stop avoiding my own fate and face what truly lies at the root of the problem. The rest of the days of my solitude was spent in grief.

Feeling sorry for myself wasn't any better than the raging nights. It was truly pitiful how I ended up here.

There was a knock at the door frame. I didn't have to look to guess it was my mate. "I'm not hungry Eris." I say plainly, continuing to stare out at the river. "Have you eaten today?" I don’t expect his voice to be behind me as he slithers into the bed beside me, curling an arm around my waist. “I had a bowl of soup not too long ago.” I answer, flipping onto my side to look up at him. His golden eyes that rolled with sadness, he couldn’t help blaming himself for my situation and I hated that he did. “Okay.” He pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead. “I have to return to Autumn later tonight, high lord stuff.” He grumbled and I groaned, tucking closer to him. “I’ll be back in the morning.” He promised. I huff, wrapping an arm around his torso and burrowing into his chest. “Unless, you want to come with me?” He arched a brow and I look up at him, my head propped up on his chest. “To the Autumn court?” I ask. He nods, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

I haven’t been to my mates court since Eris’ coronation because it’d raise suspicion if a girl from Rhysand’s inner circle began to roam the markets of the foreign court. But I suppose that didn’t matter now if our secrets out. “You think your people will react well?” I ask anxiously. “After my father ruled over them they’ll take anything they can get, and if a pretty high lady is an option I think they’ll be over the moon.” He offers me a gentle smile. “High lady?” I can’t help but smile at the idea of ruling a court together. He nods. I fantasize about the idea for a moment, until the thought of Cassian finding out about me proudly wearing an autumn court crown settles over me. He’d fall into a fit of pure rage and I’d never forgive myself. “Can we wait?” I ask. “Just until all this is resolved with Cass, and then yes. I’d love to be your high lady.” I nod. He gives me a comforting expression. “Of course my love.” He leans down and presses a gentle kiss to my lips. I him against the action and kiss him back. Wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him impossibly closer. His lips slotted perfectly against mine and the feeling that bloomed in my chest when kissing him filled the pit of my stomach and the hollowness of my heart. I felt lighter. A knock sounds at the front door, loud and demanding. My ears perk at the sound and I pull back, he seems to want to chase my mouth back to his but he freezes too when another impatient knock rings through the house.

I sigh and sink down into the bed. "You can answer it." I say, removing my arms from his neck. "Are you sure?" He asks, his own warm arms slipping from my waist and I wished they didn’t. "They all know by now, what's the point of hiding it?" I grumble, and he nods as he stands from the bed, my eyes watching him as he does so. "Alright." He nods. “If it’s not Cassian I’m not interested.” I voice. He glances to me and only nods in reply.

He leaves the room and my eyes go back to the window. I strain my ears to hear for the voices in the living room but I can only hear Eris.

"She doesn't want to see you." He said. A mumble of a voice replied, it was soft, must be female. My hope diminished when I realized it's not my brother. "In the bedroom." Is the next thing I hear from my mate and I mentally prepare for whoever is about to walk into my room.

The door creeks open but I don't move. I stay looking out the window, watching as dusk now takes over the sky. "Gods its dark in here." Nesta.

I don't have the energy to reply, giving her enough of an answer with my silence. "Look, I know I'm not who you want to see, but he's in a similar state as you." She hums and that fact settles deep into my bones. I adjust, sitting up and facing her, leaning back against my headboard.

"He throws up every night too?" I ask with a wry sense of humor. Nesta tossed a glare toward Eris who stood at the doorway like a guard.

"No, much worse. He won't stop training." She hums, crossing her arms and sitting on the edge of the bed beside my thighs. Her eyes go distant as she thinks about her mate. "He's spent more time in the training ring than sleeping as of late, he doesn't joke anymore, and I haven't seen him smile in a week." She confesses, her brows creased in concern.

"Are you telling me this to try and make me feel better?" I murmur, avoiding her gaze.

"You know me better than that." She scoffs. It was true, Nesta is one of my best friends. The three Valkyries all are, but especially the eldest Archeron. I remember all the things I said about her, how I boiled her down to all of her faults. The hollowness returns and another thing I will never forgive myself about forms. "I care about you, but I care about him more." She stands up, Eris growls from the doorway but I wave him off, understanding what she meant. "And I just need the two of you to figure your shit out so he goes back to his usual self, it’s so quiet at the house." She crosses her arms over her chest defensively but her tone is soft. "He misses you." She reveals. "He won't admit it but he wants to see you, stop by the house, please." She finalizes, before turning on her heel and walking towards the door.

"Nesta," I call, she whirls around to look at me. "Thank you." Is all I can get out. She nods, then turns back around and exits the way she came.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

The house of wind was emptier than I expected it to be. Eris offered a dozen times to come with me last night, saying that he’d cancel his meetings in the Autumn court so he can offer some sort of support but I told him he had to tend to his own court, that I had to do this on my own. So here I was, about an entire day after Nesta's speech, ready to face my brother. Or at least I hoped I was.

I wandered the halls, stretching ny hearing for any sound but I was met with nothing. I remember Nesta mentioning the training ring so I ascend the steps to the roof.

The clang of metal swords clash loudly as I welcome myself onto the landing, staring at my brother and Azriel who were sparring just to get frustration out. Cassian was sloppy with his moves, not breathing through each step the way he usually did. And Azriel was going easy on him. It was rare for the competitive shadow singer to sympathize but in this instance he was working Cassian like a charity case. The general knew it too and only fueled more of that anger he held in each of his swings.

Azriel and I make eye contact and his movements freeze, shadows pooling at my feet as Cassian struck him down and pinned him with his sword. "Again." My brother demanded, reaching his hand out toward the spymaster. Azriel remained looking at me and with the distraction, Cassian whirled around to look at me with narrowed eyes that quickly turned wide.

His sword clattered down onto the mat as he let it slip from his hand. "Cass." My voice is a rasp. He takes a step out of the training ring until he's right in front of me and I'm looking up at him again.

Tears well in my eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean what I said I just—" I tried to speak but was cut off by his large arms wrapping around me tightly into a warm hug. I melt into it, releasing a soft sigh of relief and hugging him back. "You were right." He confesses. "I was just hurt and wasn't thinking about how you might be feeling." He mutters into my hair. "No you were right to be mad," I shake my head. "I kept it a secret from you for a long time, I should tell you everything." I admit and he backs away from the hug.

"I don't want you to feel like you can't tell me things, I reacted poorly." He sighs. "I did too, the things I said about Nesta were uncalled for. You know I love her." I say with tearful eyes. “I know, it’s okay.” He reassures, squeezing me tighter and lifting me up off the ground slightly with his height. "But, I'm not sorry for being with Eris." I assert as he places me back on the ground and he backs away. His eyes soften and he wipes a stray tear from my face. "I know, it'll take some time for me to get used to but I want you to be happy." He utters and that's all I needed to hear. "I can't promise he'll be invited to all the family dinners." He scratches the side of his neck and I offer him a relaxed smile. "That's okay," I nod my head. "I doubt he'd want to come anyways." I shrug. "The prick should consider himself lucky for even being able to look at you." Cassian grumbles. I give him a reprimanding look and he puts his hands up like he's been caught for a crime. "Sorry, I'll be better." He promises. "Thank you, brother." I pull him closer into another hug. "Means the world to me." I mumble and he presses a kiss to the crown of my head the way he's always done for the past five hundred years.

"You're sweaty." I grimace, breaking away from his hug. I lean to the side of him to see Azriel waiting impatiently for him to return to the training ring. "Do me a favor?" I look up at him. "Anything." He hums without hesitation. "Kick Az's ass for me?" I arch a brow and a menacing smile curves his lips. "I heard that!" Azriel calls from a few yards away, dammed shadows.

I look at the blue siphoned male glaring at me as Cassian retreats back to his sword. I blow the spy master a kiss and he waves me off. I smile contentedly and winnow back home.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Eris leaned against the kitchen counter with a furrow in his brow, waiting impatiently for me to return. I was surprised at his early arrival, he said he’d be home tonight but the sun had barely left the horizon. I suppose he wanted to return as soon as possible. He pushed off the counter and looks at me expectantly. A bright smile curves my lips and I jump into his arms, he catches me without so much as a stumble back, his warm hands coming under my thighs and heating me up like a cozy fire. "Everything's okay?" He asks worriedly, I don't reply and instead bring my hands up to his sharp cheekbones and pull him in for a kiss.

It was soft and lasting, like he was afraid I was going to tell him to leave after this ends. That Cassian somehow convinced me my mate was some maniacal creature who didn't deserve love. He wouldn't blame me, he'd go if I asked him and that fact is tearing at me. So I deepened our kiss, pulling him closer with a hope to reassure him.

"Please tell me everything's okay." He begs against my lips and I nod. "Everything's okay." I whisper with a small smile and he releases a hefty sigh, the weight of a world lifting from his shoulders. "Cass said he'd try his best. But then he followed up by saying you're a prick so?" I scrunch my nose at the way it sounds and he grins widely. "Sounds about right." He nods, placing me atop the countertop.

"Thank you." I say, wrapping my legs around him. "For what my dear?" His brows crease. "You took care of me when I was at my worst, I appreciate it." I softly say, his eyes glaze over for a moment but the sheen quickly disappears after he blinks. "You would've done the same thing for me." He shakes his head, leaning closer and pressing a gentle kiss to the corner of my lips. "I think I'll miss sneaking around with you." He admits and I chuckle. "Me too, but think about all the things we can do now that we don't have to be a secret?" I grin wildly at all the possibilities. His eyes light up and a smirk curves his sensual lips.

"What?" I ask him nervously when he doesn't say anything. "How would you like to be crowned high lady now?" He suggests and my cheeks heat. "But you've already been crowned, can we still do that?" I tilt my head. "It's my court love, I can do whatever I want." His arrogant tone makes me roll my eyes. "And what do you want?" I tilt my head, running my hands through the tufts of his deep auburn hair. "I want you on my throne." He purred, pressing a kiss to my jaw. "That can be arranged." I grin, throwing my arms over his shoulders.

"Anything else high lord?" I give him a seductive smile and he gets the hint. "I also want to fuck you by the fireplace." He confessed, pressing light kisses up the side of my face. "Then what are you waiting for?"

Taglist: @fxckmiup @olive-main @iluvyewman-blog @gaymistakeboi

Comment a “💙” to be added to the tag list!

[hairmetal666]

3 Times Eddie has a Secret + 1 Time Steve Does

I.

Erica Sinclair wants to throw a Valentine's Day party, and woe betide anyone coming between Erica and an idea. Eddie's happy to show up, spend some time with the kids, Robin, and Steve (though he's with the latter pair all the time), and mostly doesn't think much about it. That is until, two weeks out, Max shows up at his trailer with that look on her face, and he knows he's in for it, though he's not sure why.

He gives her a little bow. "To what do I owe the pleasure, Max?"

"You're going to Erica's party, Munson." Her hands go to her hips and her brow pinches. It's such a Steve Harrington pose it knocks something loose in Eddie's chest. "And you aren't going to say one word about conformists and sheep."

He rolls his eyes, sighs hard. "I'm surprised at you, Mayfield. Didn't have you pegged as a candy hearts type of gal."

"It's for Erica." The tip of her sneaker scuffs at the earth. "And Lucas likes it."

Eddie bites his lip to stifle his smile. They're so fucking cute.

"I suppose I can put in an appearance."

"And be on your best behavior?"

"Scout's Honor."

"You weren't a scout," she grumbles.

"Nope. But still. I'll do it for Little Sinclair."

It shouldn't bother him, the assumption that he'd be a shit about Valentine's Day. He's worked really hard to cultivate an image and it doesn't exactly scream "Be Mine." And yes, yeah, sure, the Munson Doctrine doesn't go in for the holiday, and his cynical heart blah-blah-blah. It's just that. Well, he sort of enjoys the love part.

And later that night, in the safety of his dark bedroom, he acknowledges that he wouldn't mind having a date on Valentine's Day. It would be--well, it would be nice to have someone buy him flowers or chocolates, or even--ugh--a gross, sappy, sentimental card. He wants to have reservations at Enzo's, wants to go see a terrible romcom after, wants to go home and fall into bed with the person he loves. And it isn't metal, or even very cool, but he wants to be showered with affection, celebrated, fucking loved.

He wants so much his entire body aches with it.

II.

Eddie's at Family Video, rifling through the candy that he knows Steve just reorganized.

"What are you looking for, Munson?" Robin asks. She's half-engrossed in the paperwork in front of her.

Eddie's half listening, watching Steve re-shelve New Releases. He's focused on the VHSs in his arms, so Eddie has ample opportunity to admire the bunch and stretch of his shoulder muscles as he reaches to the top of the wall.

"I don't know," he nibbles on his lip. "Something that's not so," he wiggles his hand through the air.

"Romantic?" She guesses.

"No," he shakes his head. "I mean--"

"You mean?" She's focused on him now, must have caught him watching Steve, and he hopes she doesn't make it a big deal.

"Something," he says. "Um. Just something different."

And what he means is a movie for a guy like him where love doesn't have to be a distant dream. Where he can have feelings for someone and it isn't potentially dangerous.

So, he smiles and shrugs. Grabs the tape closest to his hand. "Guess I'll just take this."

"Well, this is definitely different, Eddie," she says. She narrows her eyes at him, like he's a new language she's learning, but he scampers out before she can say anything.

The movie he grabbed without looking is Cocoon and he can't even pretend interest, so he's not exactly disappointed when someone knocks at his door a few hours later. He's expecting Max, maybe Steve, but startles a little at Robin. She pushes past him and into the trailer.

"Good to see you too, Buckley."

She ignores him. "I have something to tell you. You and Steve are the only people who know."

"Okay?" His eyes are so wide it kind of hurts.

She takes a deep breath. "I'm gay."

"What?" He shrieks, doesn't know why. He's always kind of known.

Robin responds by swatting at him, and they bat at one another with the tips of their fingers.

"Nancy?" He asks once they calm down.

"Shut-up," Robin flushes a dark red.

"It's the guns right?"

It's her turn to shriek, and she gets a solid punch in on his shoulder. They wrestle around, until Eddie pulls away, pushing his hair off his sweaty forehead.

"I'm--" he's never said the words to another person. Uncle Wayne just sort of knew and you don't really have to talk at any of the bars he goes to in Indy. "I'm gay too," he tells Robin.

She beams at him. "Cool."

"Cool." He fiddles with his rings. "Harrington knows about you?"

"He was the first person I told."

"You aren't going to tell him about me?"

She leans her head on his shoulder. "Of course not. But he'd be okay, if you wanted to tell him."

He can't help but scoff. "It's different for lesbians, Buckley. Straight guys can be into that."

She scoffs right back. "Steve isn't like that and you know it."

She's right. He does. But the fear runs deep. Especially especially because it's Steve. And Eddie couldn't handle any of things that might happen if Robin is wrong.

"Thanks, Bucks," he says. He leans his head against hers, hugs her close.

III.

Erica's party is happening at Steve's and Eddie shows up at the appointed time, with the appointed cupcakes (baked from a box, frosted from a can).

The kids are shouting in the living room, but his eyes automatically find Steve in the kitchen. He has a a towel draped over his shoulder, hair disheveled, and is mixing Tropical Punch and Sprite into a serving bowl.

"How'd you end up hosting?" Eddie asks.

Steve smiles, a bashful little thing. "Erica called me this morning and yelled until I agreed."

"Pushover," Eddie teases.

"Oh, and you just made those cupcakes for fun, Munson?"

"Shut-up, Harrington." Eddie knocks their shoulders together. "They're ugly as shit. Didn't know there was an art to frosting cupcakes."

"I think I can help. You mind?"

Steve grabs some plastic spatula looking thing, gets to work with a focused determination that has him biting at his lip. Heat kicks in Eddie's blood, makes it so he can't watch. Instead, he slides a finger into the icing.

"Hey! What--? Munson!" Steve yells, as Eddie brushes the pink frosting onto Steve's cheekbone.

"Got ya!" He dances out of reach.

They bob and weave and dodge through the kitchen, laughing and yelling, until Steve has Eddie pressed against the cabinets, no escape. They're close, breathing hard and pink-faced. He can't help glancing down at the plush softness of Steve's mouth, can't help noticing Steve's eyes track the movement. Time pauses, stutters, and the distance between them closes.

"Steve!" Dustin shouts. "What's taking so long?"

The tension breaks and Eddie escapes into the living room, desperate to convince himself it wasn't a moment, that Steve isn't interested. Wishes his heart was a little more cynical, after all.

The party is fun. There are games and snacks and crafts. He gets roped into playing Mystery Date and tries and fails to not notice Steve bent over, playing Twister, left hand on red, right hand on green.

When they start doing crafts, Steve is hard at work on a Valentine.

"What you making, Stevie?" Eddie asks. He cranes his neck to see.

"Back off, Munson."

"Got someone you've been admiring, big boy?"

Steve goes pink and Eddie can't tell if it's the nickname or his question.

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

And since Eddie really, really would, he jumps towards Steve, trying to sneak a peek. Steve laughs, hard and kind of surprised, before hunching over the card.

"None of your business, Eddie." But Steve is flushed and smiling.

Eddie pouts. "You know how much I love knowing things."

Steve looks at him. Like, looks at him, and Eddie goes warm all over.

"Maybe if you're a good boy today, you'll get to know later, yeah?"

Good boy does things. It makes Eddie's heart stop, his breathing slow, re-routes all the blood in his body south. He can only gasp and nod, sure his eyes are weirdly glazed.

Good boy. He's not sure if he hears another word spoken to him for the rest of the day.

IV.

The party draws to a close. For once in their lives, the actual parents are driving their kids around and Robin hitches a ride with the Hopper-Byers, leaving Eddie and Steve on clean-up.

"Wanna stick around, Munson? Watch a movie? Think I have a joint leftover from last week."

"Course, Stevie, how could I say no to such a generous offer."

"I think you're making fun of me, but I don't understand why."

Eddie laughs. "Totally genuine, sweetheart. Cross my heart." Steve smiles at that, his eyes turning the color of honey.

Eddie is so, so fucked.

They get situated on the couch and Steve says, "Have you been good today?"

"Huh?" Eddie can't breathe.

"I said you could see what I was making if you were good today. Were you?"

Eddie can't speak, can't think, can't move. His brain is throbbing. This has to be a dream. No way Steve is actually asking that.

But Steve is looking at him and somehow he has the presence of mind to fucking nod, and then Steve is handing him a red construction paper heart and a rose with petals so purple they're almost black.

He's hallucinating. That's what this is. He got some laced weed and now his wildest fantasy is playing out in his head.

The Valentine has a white lace doily thing glued to it and it says, in glitter:

"Roses are red,

Violets are Blue;

Eddie Munson,

I really like you"

His eyes fall on Steve. He perceives him, the way a pink flush sits high on his cheekbones, the shine in his eyes, the tremble in his hands.

Oh shit. Oh shit. Eddie isn't hallucinating. He's not dreaming. He's--

"Steve," he sounds a wreck.

"It's--Eddie, it's okay if you don't like me back. I just--I've liked you for a while and Robin thought I should tell you, and--"

"Steve," he says again, stands this time. "Can I kiss you?" It's a miracle he gets the words out.

"God, yes, please," Steve nearly whines.

Eddie pulls him in close, slotting their mouths together. Steve tastes like Tropical Punch and frosting and he makes a little noise as Eddie nips at his lip.

And that's it, that's all it takes. Eddie is gone, ruined, Valentine's celebrator until the end of time, lost forever to Steve-goddamn-Harrington.

[lemon-natalia]

Gideon the Ninth Reaction - Chapter 20

i just wanna apologise in advance for how long these posts are getting lol, i have a lot of Thoughts about this book

oh wait nope they are going back to the creepy lab where two people just got murdered. great plan guys

Dulcinea wanting to team up surprised me a little, but it really shouldn't have. she's been paying a lot of attention to the Ninth, and especially Gideon.

'thousands of years after you're gone ... is when you really live' this is such a different, almost warmer, perspective on death and necromancy, and i can see why it appeals to Dulcinea specifically, who's clearly had to come to terms with her mortality pretty early on in life. but its also part of the more disturbing theme that the past never really goes away, and can't help but view this line along the same lines of discovering the ancient study last chapter, and the ancient laboratory, and Canaan House in general, which are only just now having their secrets revealed, and the terrible consequences of those secrets becoming apparent, after thousands of years

'she grasped a railing, leaned over, and proffered her hand' well this is getting very courtly romance

ah yes lets go through the door decorated with a swirl of human teeth, i'm sure there's happy fun times to be had in there. harrow, resident goth interior designer who specialises in bone decor, is probably taking notes as we speak

even after hurting her hand twice, Harrow really just can't resist experimenting even further huh. she's so very reluctant to accept that her existing powers aren't enough by themselves for this

ooohhhh, having to literally suck the life force out of your cavalier to win?? thats so sick and twisted and i love it. these challenges are, again, clearly relying on this intense relationship between the pair, both in trusting them absolutely and in this literal soul-siphoning/melding link thing.

however, it feels like Gideon's really getting the brunt of it in these challenges. Harrow's absolutely putting in an awful lot of effort and power, but it's the cavalier who has to fight the bone amalgamation, the cavalier who has to have their life literally siphoned out. they're about trust and a bond between them, but also seemingly about a willingness to sacrifice your cavalier to achieve that goal, and i have a really bad feeling about where exactly this is going in terms of how exactly one achieves lyctorhood

'under no circumstances will i ever desire your juice' Harrow you may wish to revisit this sentiment when you guys (to my limited knowledge) eventually become girlfriends

'none of this is worth it, at all [...] i'm sorry. We take so much' i'm like 90% sure the voice talking to Gideon throughout all this was Dulcinea, largely because it doesn't really make sense for it to be anyone else, but there were certain lines, specifically these ones, that made me suspicious at first it might be some(one? thing?) else. but it also feels fitting that its Dulcinea coaching her through this.

wow, just wow, i'm really impressed with the writing in this chapter, and how the pain Gideon is feeling is expressed. its such an abstract experience/feeling to describe, but i think its done incredibly well

'Ha-ha, said Gideon, first time you didn't call me Griddle, and died' ok i know she didn't but THANKS for giving me an absolute heart attack with that sentence Tamsyn Muir

Harrow i get understand u are protective of Gideon but let Dulcinea comfort her plz

'you can't just ask someone why they want to be a Lyctor'. ahh the duality of Gideon the Ninth. this just evocative prose about how it feels to be on the brink of death, and then immediately afterwards hits you in the face with a mean girls reference. beautiful, iconic, effervescent.

[dyns33]

Sentimental weather

A little Morpheus x female reader

I'm less and less good with titles

It was raining.

No, the word was not strong enough.

It was a real torrent, a storm, a hurricane outside, and no one around Y/N seemed to care.

It must have been that, and the fact that she had found herself in this weird and unfamiliar place when she opened her eyes, that she hadn't been worried for more than a minute, before running under a tree to take shelter.

A raven seemed to have had the same idea, even though he thought it stupid, as he let her know.

"It's dangerous to stay under a tree during a thunderstorm."

"Oh, really ?" replied Y/N, who had the feeling that it was not normal for a raven to be able to speak.

"Yeah. Lightning could kill you. But you can't die here. Well, I don't think so. People can die while sleeping, but I don't know if it kills you for real to die in dreams. The boss says that we're real, but when someone is injured while sleeping, they're fine when they wake up, so I'm a bit lost. I have to say, he doesn't explain very well."

"Ravens have bosses ?"

"Not ravens. Me. I'm the raven, thank you. I'm here to assist the boss. Although I'm not much use at the moment. It's kind of his fault too, he doesn't listen. He's stubborn and sensitive. I've been told this isn't the first time this has happened. I really wish the rain would stop, it's been weeks now."

If his boss didn't explain well, the raven wasn't really any better. He continued to complain about the weather, until Y/N woke up. It seemed perfectly logical that this was all a dream, and she didn't think about it for the rest of the day.

But next night, when she opened her eyes again after falling asleep, she was still near the castle, in the pouring rain.

She was a little surprised, but as if it were normal, she went back under the tree, where she found the talking bird.

"Well, you're back." he noted. "And you don't listen to my advice. Just like him. I've been trying to talk to him all day, but no ! It's still raining."

"I don't understand the connection between your boss and the rain."

"It's because he's sad that it's raining. I mean, I can try to understand. He was in love, I think, even though it had only been a month and she wasn't great. I didn't like her at all personally. He struggles with feelings. Words, people… He struggles. He's had a lot of problems. But it's been weeks now, he has to pull himself together and listen to his good mate Matthew ! I can't fly in his conditions !"

As the raven, Matthew, continued to speak, Y/N looked up at the balcony of the castle and saw a man staring at the horizon, standing in the rain and looking terribly sad.

He must have been the famous boss.

Remembering that it was only a dream, and therefore not caring about the consequences of her actions, Y/N ventured towards the castle despite the raven's protests. Still without thinking, she went to the balcony, finding herself next to the man who was causing this storm.

"Hello." she said simply. "Matthew says you're sad and that's why it's raining."

"Matthew seems to say a lot of things except what relates to his job. He has to report when a dreamer gets lost so far."

"I'm not lost, you can't get lost in a dream. I know perfectly well where I am."

"Really ?" asked the man, without turning to her. "And where do you find yourself, little dreamer ?"

"In my bed. Unless I'm sleepwalking, but I don't think so."

"You think, you're not sure. You are wrong, we can get lost in a dream, and get stuck. Better check where you are."

Y/N then opened her eyes, in her bed, as she had said. The rest of the day passed without her thinking about this dream.

When she found herself again in front of the castle, under the storm, she did not go to join the little raven, who sighed when he saw her pass in front of his tree.

Still in the rain, still staring sadly at the hoziron, the boss made no comment as she came to stand next to him.

"Hello again. I was right, I was in my bed if you're interested. Anyway, Matthew talked about heartbreak. Look, I don't pretend to understand how you feel, and maybe it's not my business, but still, you have to move on. It's difficult, okay, but as the poet said, it's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved. That's life, you have to live."

This time, the man looked at Y/N, and seeing his eyes, she understood that he was not human. There was something powerful and ancient in his starry eyes. There was also something else she couldn't decipher.

"… I said something similar once, to someone very dear to me." he whispered in a strange voice.

"Well, you have to know how to follow your own advice. Of course it may take time and you can ask for help, but I promise you that everything will be better soon. You deserve it. I don't know you, but you make it rain for love and a raven is worried about you, so you must be nice deep down."

The boss continued to stare at her with a strange look, impossible to read, between admiration, surprise, vexation at having been partially insulted and what looked a bit like love. But that was probably not it. Anyway, Y/N didn't ask, too busy waking up. Again, the events of the night didn't really affect her day.

Except maybe when a raven came tapping her window while she was preparing dinner. She looked at it for a long time, wondering if it was a trained raventhat had gotten lost and was asking for food, but without opening.

"Impolite !" he shouted when she didn't open, concentrating on her saucepan.

"… What ?"

"Crude ! Mean ! Reckless !"

"You can talk ? Are you… Matthew ?" she asked as she let him in, unable to remember when she had gone to bed. Because it had to be a dream.

"Yes, it's me. Sorry, I shouldn't have gotten upset, I forget it's weird to see a talking raven. Thanks for opening up, and remembering my name. The other never remembered it, she was mean."

"The other ? Who?"

"The previous one. Look, I guess you didn't do it on purpose, and I'm quite glad the sun came out, but… You could have been careful, really. We didn't need that."

"I understand absolutely nothing."

"Lord Morpheus isn't sad anymore, thanks to you. Hooray. Except not totally, because… He's in love again."

"Really ? That's a good thing. With who ?"

"Who do you think, Sherlock ?" sighed the raven, staring at her.

"… Oh."

"Yeah, oh. So be nice, you've seen what happens when he's down, please don't break his heart."

"But he doesn't exist. You either, I'm dreaming."

"… Shit. I did well to come. So I'll say it quickly, I'm real, Lord Morpheus is real, what happens in dreams is real, you're not crazy, and my boss is madly in love with you now. Digest the information quickly, please."

Just because the raven said it didn't mean it was true, Y/N could be dreaming or losing her mind. But all the same, dreaming of the same thing four days in a row was not completely normal.

If she decided to believe Matthew, it involved a lot of things and questions she would ask him later. Because there was more urgent.

"… He loves me ? Me ? Why ?"

"You are a beautiful soul, noble and pure, wise, who will perhaps appreciate his company despite all his faults. End of quote."

"That's a bit quick, isn't it ? I don't know him at all, you just told me his name."

"Well, that's not bad enough. Some people get married without even knowing that. If he asks you, say yes !"

"Matthew. Stop it immediately."

The raven jumped with her, moved in front of Y/N as if to protect her, before looking genuinely frightened when he saw his boss, Lord Morpheus, standing in the middle of the living room, the arm crossed and looking displeased.

Obviously the little emissary had not asked permission to come here.

"Hi, boss ! I'm… I was…"

"Again saying things you shouldn't. Leave her alone, go back to the Dreaming and help Lucienne in the library."

"Yes, boss !"

Not wasting a moment, the raven immediately flew out the window. Lord Morpheus watched him disappear into the clouds, before slowly turning towards Y/N. Again, it was hard to know what he was thinking.

"My apologies for the intrusion, and the pressure. Matthew shouldn't have acted like that, but he's impulsive and protective, he thought he was doing the right thing."

"… Is it true that you are real and that you love me ?"

"I heard that these two facts were not very clear." he sighed, looking suddenly embarrassed. "I want to do things right, so I intended to woo you, so as not to rush you, and so that you can know who I am. But if my advances are not welcome, a word from you and I will leave."

It was a way out. It was touching of him, because as he said, Matthew talked a lot, and Matthew said a lot of things that might have made Y/N think it wasn't a good idea to hang out with Lord Morpheus.

He was a complicated being, who had trouble with feelings, people, who was dramatic, stubborn, sensitive, with a difficult past, both in general and in his romantic relationships.

But so were many other people.

"Matthew couldn't tell me if we died in real life after dying in a dream." was Y/N's response. "You said we can get lost, so…"

Lord Morpheus considered what she had just said, understanding that it was an invitation to stay, chat with her, and possibly start his court if he wished to. He smiled slightly as he began to explain to her, and Y/N then realized two things :

It wouldn't be difficult to fall in love with this man, as dangerous as it could be.

Matthew was right, he didn't explain very well.

[mangomonk]

edit: here's the full fic based off this drabble! pt. 1 and pt. 2

an idea about goodie two shoes!remus that's been bouncing around in my head

remus is straight laced — he follows the rules to the t, tries his best in his studies, is polite and diplomatic to the teachers and the other students — all because he feels he can't afford to stray from being a good citizen. he's exhausted but he's afraid that if he does something wrong, the other students will look at him and if they look at him for too long, they'll know. he's dry and sarcastic and himself around the marauders, but outside of them, everyone only ever has glowing words for remus. polite. helpful. charming. remus prides himself on his princely behavior.

the only thing is that recently, he's begun to hear murmurs. "why doesn't remus lupin have a girlfriend?" he overhears one hufflepuff fourth year ask her group of friends. He knows they're really only whisperings, but remus, afraid of being seen as other, can't help but fixate on them, especially when he hears similar sentiment. "he receives plenty of confessions, but he only ever gives a vague rejection."

before he can even help it, remus is stuck into a spiral of anxiety. though he knows it's foolish, he can't help it. he's sure that everyone will connect the dots. first it'll start with the question of why he's never accepted a confession after all these years, and then soon, someone will guess that there's something wrong with him. and then everyone will see right through him.

after a particularly rough full moon, coupled by his growing anxieties, he accidentally snaps on a random girl. he doesn't even really remember her name or what he said or what even led him to snap at her, but once he does, he feels a strange mix of guilt and pure relief, as if the burden of holding up this princely facade has been lifted off his shoulders. and then he feels horror. she's staring back at him in pure surprise and all remus can think is, she's going to tell everyone what i'm really like. paralyzed in fear, all remus can do is mumble a half-assed apology before turning on heel and high tailing it out of the library.

"if you're so worried about this, why not just get a temporary girlfriend?" james suggests later at dinner, mistakenly taking remus's silence as anxiety about the girlfriend rumors, and not how he had blown up on some girl — remus didn't tell them, he was still panicking trying to figure out a plan for damage control. he couldn't help but keep watching her across the great hall, on edge every time she said something to a friend. if only he could keep watch.

"it's not that easy, prongs," remus says, forcing his voice to be even. if i get a girlfriend, she'll find out easily after i disappear each month. not to mention remus in general not wanting to subject someone to his lycanthropy.

"seems easy enough," sirius says, nodding past his shoulder. "you have another confession lined up."

"er, remus," a ravenclaw girl says from behind him. he recognizes her from his potions class, but all he can feel is a sense of dread as he notices a few other students turn around in growing interest. "i've fancied you for quite awhile now, and i was wondering..."

remus has a hard time listening to her as his nerves grow. if he rejects her in front of all these people, are the rumors going to spread? out of the corner of his eye, reflexively, he spots the girl he had blown up on earlier leaning to whisper something to her friend. "i'm sorry," remus says, forcing on an apologetic smile. before he can question himself, his nerves gets the better of him. "i actually have someone i like right now."

"oh," the ravenclaw girl squeaks, disappointed. "sorry, i didn't know—"

"that's okay, i haven't made it very clear," remus cuts in hurriedly, his gaze fixating past her. the ravenclaw doesn't even have a chance to ask — she likely wouldn't have asked anyways, but remus points to the girl from earlier. "—that i like her."

ANYWAYS can you imagine the hurt that would ensue if they eventually start dating (fake on his end, real on hers... he picks her because 1) he never expects her to agree to date him after that incident, 2) he can keep an eye on her or blame his behavior on having a crush) and eventually he grows comfortable to not have to put up this goodie two shoes facade but she finds out it was just to cover his ass yeah... im hurting

EDIT: full fic below pt. 1: i thought that i was dreaming when you said you loved me pt. 2: i've been dreaming

[jnnul]

super shy

genre: FLUFF, angst bc of reader's insecurities but minji's there to take them all away <3

word count: 0.9k

type: drabble

a/n: hehe back to my roots! here's a little drabble for my beautiful girl after so long of not writing for her <3

it seems when you're sitting here, wrapped up in minji's arms, the entire world is at peace. you know this isn't true and that the moment you have to leave her embrace, the world comes back to the chaotic never-ending march of time you know it to be. but the sentiment makes you feel a little more calm and a little less worried about the future.

"what's got your pretty little head so occupied?" minji says. you're slouched so that your head is resting against her chest and it makes you feel so safe and warm that you can feel the vibrations of her steady heartbeat next to your head and rise and fall of her chest with every breath.

you always ask her if its too much or if you're too heavy or if she's uncomfortable but she always manages to quiet your thoughts with a firm press of her lips against yours, kissing you until she can physically feel the overthinking in your brain finally come to a rest, smiling when she finally does.

her smile never fails to give you butterflies deep in your stomach - especially when its pressed against your own.

"nothing," you say, looking up at her. she tilts her head, eyes searching deep within your own to look for any sign of lying or trying to keep her from worrying about you.

"i mean it. i'm not thinking about anything. i was just - kinda feeling how lucky i am to have you in my life. and how much i love you," you say, your words growing softer as you speak, suddenly growing shy in front of your girlfriend.

minji looks at you for a moment to make sure you truly weren't hiding your feelings from her and when she's satisfied, she lets out a full bellied laugh.

"oh my god. we've been dating for what, like, three years? why do you still get so shy around me?" minji says softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. you scramble out of your position to look at her in the eyes.

"you don't get shy around me anymore?" you gawk. minji shrugs, leaning her weight on her palms behind her.

"no - i mean, i still want to impress you. like i still want you to fawn over me and i still want to spoil the shit out of you and it gives me butterflies when you compliment me or when you look at me so excited about something. even more when you're excited because of me. but i don't really get shy around you," she explains, although she's quick to add, "that's a personality thing though, i promise i love you more and more everyday. i'm not falling out of love with you."

"oh." it's all you have to say and all you know to say honestly. it still amazes you how well minji can read you and how she always manages to find the right words to appease your fluttering thoughts.

"i get shy around you. and it makes me feel bad sometimes, because i end up overthinking everything because i can't believe someone as beautiful as you thinks that i'm worth spending your time on, to be honest. especially when you should and could be spending your time on such bigger and more beautiful people. and i know they're just my insecurities and i need to fix my way of thinking but...yeah..." you trail off when minji's lips fix into a disapproving frown. she gathers your hands in hers, leaning down so that she can catch your downcast gaze.

"baby, please. first of all, i think you're incredibly beautiful. but you and i both know that it matters most that you understand how beautiful you are. just because you don't look like a kpop idol doesn't mean you're not beautiful. to be honest, if you did, i don't know that i would love you as much as i do. not that looks are everything and i know that i would love your personality but that's just it - i made that first move on you because i thought you were gorgeous.

"think about it this way: you look at a van gogh and a monet and think they're both beautiful, right? but they look nothing alike. just because something is beautiful, it doesn't take away from something or someone else's beauty. i love you. and i want you to love yourself as much as i do because there might come a day where i can't be with you, even though i wish there was nothing that could keep us apart and i could be by your side every minute and every second."

"but when i can't be next to you, i want you to love yourself to the fullest. i want you to know that you are so gorgeous inside and out and that the reason you were put on this earth is to spread the beauty you have with so many people."

"honestly, you make me a better person just by being around you. that's your beauty, y/n. please, baby," she says, reaching out to put her palms on your cheek, wiping away the tears cascading down your cheeks as gently as possible with her thumbs, smiling at you.

you lean forward to wrap her in the greatest hug you possibly can.

"i love you so much minji. and i love that you love me so much that you want me to love myself the same way that you do."

and the world will continue to spin tomorrow, but for right this moment, this is enough for you.

[reunionatdawn]

A Midsummer Night's Dream: Analyzing the Romantic Subtext of (Japanese) KH 358/2 Days

Day 94 ~Hearts~

Roxas: What are we fighting for? Axel: We're fighting for the greater Kingdom Hearts, didn't you see it today? Roxas: [...] Is Kingdom Hearts really that important? Axel: Hey, what are you talking about now? Roxas: But, since I don't have a heart, I don't really understand. Axel: Roxas... If you had a heart, you'd surely understand. That's why we're seeking hearts, right? Roxas: I see... That's right...

I will be using my own translations for most of this meta, because nuance is very often lost in the localization process. The mission for this day took place at the Beast's Castle. Roxas was intrigued that the Beast was personally fighting the Heartless even though he had servants. He had an important reason to fight, something to protect.

This only made Roxas question whether he had any good reason to fight Heartless himself. When he used the word "important" he used "大切な" (taisetsuna). It tends to emphasize emotional or sentimental value rather than practical importance. And in Japanese, it was a tiny bit more suggestive that Axel already knew why having a heart was so important. He already had his own reason to fight.

Day 94: The plan is proceeding smoothly, but... (Saïx) Thanks to Roxas and Xion, the wielders of the Keyblade, hearts have converged, and the great Kingdom Hearts has appeared before us. Our objective is being achieved. Every plan is proceeding smoothly. The fact that everything is going so smoothly is cause for concern, but perhaps I am overthinking it.

In both the Japanese and English versions, Saïx expressed paranoia about how smoothly the process of completing Kingdom Hearts was going. The phrase, "The course of true love never did run smooth" is one of the most famous quotes from A Midsummer Night's Dream. Essentially, the quote suggests that real love is not always easy or straightforward; it requires effort, perseverance, and the ability to overcome obstacles. This quote is relevant because there is evidence that the entire game's narrative was inspired by that play. It's similar to how Versus XIII was originally going to be inspired by Hamlet.

Day 96 ~Xion's Keyblade~

Sora: Kairi, you can't come. Kairi: Why not? Sora: I can't risk putting you in any more danger. Kairi: But we've faced danger together before, haven't we? I get more anxious when I'm alone. Sora: Even if you're not with us, Kairi, we're not alone anymore. Right? Kairi: Am I a hindrance? Sora: Well, yeah, kind of. Kairi: I see. Okay then. Take this. It's an important charm, so make sure to give it back!

In both the novel and manga, Xion mentioned that she could still feel the warmth of Roxas's hand on his Keyblade. It was meant to bring to mind several scenes from KH1, such as when Sora regained his ability to use the Keyblade, as well as when Kairi gave Sora her lucky charm. Wherever he went, she'd always be with him in his heart.

Axel: Oh, Roxas, are you going to Beast's Castle? I went to investigate yesterday, but those Heartless seemed pretty tough. He might have a hard time alone~. Saïx: Are you suggesting they both go together? Axel: I'm heading to Agrabah. Is that a problem? Saïx: Can you handle defeating the Heartless in Agrabah? Axel: It's fine. I'm strong enough.

The "~" is often used to indicate a trailing off or unfinished thought, similar to an ellipsis (...) in English. It suggests that the speaker is leaving the sentence open-ended or implying that there is more to say but chooses not to express it explicitly.

Axel: Heartless, why do they move so annoyingly? Thanks to them, I got hit. Roxas: Weren't you supposed to be strong? Axel: That's a separate issue.

I think it's more obvious in Japanese that Axel was trying to convince Saïx to let them go together by reminding him of some past situation when Isa relied on Lea in a similar way, leaving him to face a tough situation all by himself. The idea for Roxas to work twice as hard to make up for Xion's uselessness was Axel's idea, after all.

Xion: It's all thanks to Roxas and Axel. Axel: I didn't do anything. Xion: In the morning, you arranged for us to go on the mission together. Roxas: If it weren't for you, Xion might not have been able to reclaim her Keyblade. Xion: Thanks, Axel.

On Day 72 called "Change," Axel was bothered that Saïx didn't even seem worried about him while he was away at Castle Oblivion. And he did not thank him for doing his dirty work (even at the risk of his own life) when he returned. It was the first thing he mentioned. But Roxas and Xion thanked Axel profusely for his help. And it just seemed to make Axel very depressed.

Axel: How about a sea-salt ice cream? With that, this incident will be water under the bridge.

In English, Day 8 is the day Axel treats Roxas to ice cream and it is called "Icing on the Cake". In Japanese, it's called "ごほうび" (gohoubi). It means "reward" or "prize". It refers to something given in recognition of one's efforts or achievements, often as an incentive or encouragement. It's interesting because Axel didn't like the taste of sea-salt ice cream anymore. In the opening song, he grimaced when he first bit into it. He was only eating it due to its sentimental value.

Roxas: It would be nice if we could always be together like this. Axel: Where did that come from all of a sudden? Roxas: I was thinking it would be nice if every day, after our missions, the three of us could eat ice cream together and watch the sunset. Axel: Well, that's an impossible wish. After all, we're Nobodies.

Axel was pretty blunt here with his cynical outlook.

Pence: I wonder if we can always be together. Olette: I hope so. Hayner: Huh? What's with the sudden talk? Pence: Oh, just thinking. Hayner: Well, realistically, I doubt it. But that's just how it goes when you become an adult, right? What's important isn't how many times we meet, but how many times we think of each other.

Because he was already an adult.

Axel: What's important isn't seeing each other every day. It's more important to always think about each other, even when we can't meet. ...Got it memorized? Roxas: That doesn't suit you. Axel: Shut up.

In the DS version, after his blunt comment, Roxas and Xion lowered their heads. And it was only then that Axel changed his tone. When he used the word "important" he also used "taisetsuna". It would sound quite sentimental, so it's a bit out-of-character for him at this moment in the story. Axel didn't laugh along with Roxas and Xion when they started teasing him. Because his comment wasn't really directed at them. He had only known them a few months and didn't feel particularly sentimental towards them, at least not yet.

Day 96: Friends (Axel) Recently, I feel like I spend more time talking with Roxas and Xion than with my original comrade Saïx. So this is what having friends feels like.

That comment was said with Saïx in mind. On Day 75, Axel told Roxas and Xion that he didn't have a best friend. He used to. But they didn't have the same type of relationship they had as kids anymore. it had been so long since they had spent time hanging out and eating ice cream together that Axel forgot what friendship even felt like.

Day 117 ~Secrets~

(KH2 Novel) Naminé: Do you think Nobodies really don't have hearts? Who told Axel he doesn't have one? The heart—there are secrets that—

There were many "Secrets" being referenced on this day. The first was the secret of the heart, which Naminé alluded to in the KH2 novelization. This day showed how Axel had begun to grow a heart. He was annoyed that Saïx didn't knock, and he wanted him to get out of his room as soon as possible because it hurt to be around him.

Saïx: "The Chamber of Waking," contrasting with the "Chamber of Repose," holds a true purpose that Xemnas has not disclosed to anyone. Clues to this lie within the "Chamber of Waking." If we seize them, we can gain the upper hand, even concerning our objectives.

Saïx's main priority was completing Kingdom Hearts. But he didn't trust Xemnas and suspected that he had a secret agenda, which turned out to be true, as we saw in Dream, Drop, Distance.

Xion: When I sit here and talk with you guys… I get the strangest feeling… that a long time ago, I used to watch the sunset with somebody else. It's the same when I watch the sea. Someplace by the sea…where I hear the sound of the waves… I get the feeling that I was talking with someone. [...] You have memories, don't you, Axel? Axel: Well, sort of. Even if I do have them, they're not of any use at all.

Another secret was related to Xion's birth. Axel wanted to go to Castle Oblivion because he was curious about her origins. Xion remembered Kairi watching the sunset and telling Sora not to change. It was one of Sora's most precious memories and it was why Xion could awaken a heart. And it was also meant to depict Kairi's anxiety and loneliness over how, as we get older, we find a distance growing between us and our close friends. And that's something she had in common with Axel.

Day 118: What's Changed... (Axel) When I talk with Roxas and Xion, I often reminisce about my days as a human. Reflecting on various childhood memories, I find myself feeling inexplicably strange. I should be able to have such conversations with Saïx, but strangely, I don't feel inclined to do so. It's just a strange sense of nostalgia. It's not me who's changed... it's you.

Based on subtext, we can probably assume that Axel began to awaken a heart by spending time with Roxas and Xion because they reminded him of his childhood. Therefore, Axel's memories of the time he spent with Isa were implied to be his most precious.

Day 119 ~Accomplishment~

Day 119: Hearts and Emotion (Xaldin) Observing that foolish beast, one can see clearly how humans are often governed by trivial matters. It was precisely because we did not desire to be ruled by emotions that we chose to become Nobodies. It was much later that we realized the magnitude of that loss. While we understand that there are things that cannot be accomplished without a heart, emotions are still unpleasant.

The above quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream was spoken by the character Helena. It reflects the theme of love's unpredictability and irrationality that runs throughout the play. It suggests that the pursuit of love can often defy logical reasoning and that the dictates of the heart may not always conform to the dictates of reason.

Xaldin: If it's something he treasures, it means his heart is captive to it… When the heart is stolen, that becomes a weakness. Roxas: The heart is stolen…? I don't quite understand.

Once again, the word "大切" (taisetsu) was used, to indicate that the Beast fought so hard to protect the rose because he placed value on it for some emotional reason rather than for its practical utility. Xaldin's goal was to use the Beast's weakness to literally steal his heart and turn him into a Heartless. Idiomatically, to have one's heart stolen refers to intense feelings of romantic attraction or love.

Roxas: I understand what [the Beast] treasures now. Xion: What he treasures...? Roxas: But Xaldin said that could become his weakness. Xion: Can something valuable become a weakness? Roxas: I'm not sure... Xion: I wish Axel would come back soon...

Roxas and Xion figured that Axel would surely understand this concept and explain it to them. And in KH2, Axel was desperate to turn Sora into a Heartless, and he knew the way to do that was by targeting the person who stole his heart, which was Kairi.

Ansem's Report 4 Heartless are born from those who have their hearts stolen, and they proliferate by stealing them from other beings. What's stolen by the Heartless becomes the nourishment for creating new Heartless. While there's no certainty, I am confident in my theory. Let's verify it further by providing a large number of organisms. Furthermore, we must continue researching the behavioral principles of Heartless.

We can probably assume, based on the Ansem's Reports from KH1, that Xaldin and Axel both knew all about this principle because of their involvement in Xehanort's research as apprentices.

Ansem's Report 8 Heartless are naturally born from those who have lost their hearts. If we apply the principle of the heart, could we not synthesize them? Thinking so, I utilized the results of previous research to complete the device. When I tentatively activated it, the Heartless emerged without any problems. If we further improve this device, it may even be possible to generate them from nothing.

The experiment to generate Heartless using the device in the Heartless Manufactory was the topic of Ansem's Report 8 in KH1. During that experiment, the "principle of heart" was used.

Xemnas: The experiment to generate Heartless was an attempt to control the mind and abandon the ego. Even if we made one lose their heart that way, one could still harbor a heart in their body, which serves as a vessel.

And it's clearer in the Japanese version of KH3D that this Heartless-generating experiment was conducted for the purpose of creating a vessel. It's important to note that the word for "mind" is "精神" (seishin). It refers to the mind, spirit, or consciousness of a person.

(KH2 Novel) Saïx: How do you expect to protect anything when you've cloaked yourself in darkness? You sold your soul for power. Was it worth it?

"Seishin" can also mean "soul". While "soul" is a more metaphysical and spiritual concept in English, "seishin" encompasses both the psychological and spiritual dimensions of human consciousness in Japanese. During the experiment, the intended target was most likely Lea. Isa was probably just meant to be his weakness. But Isa probably sold his mind/soul for power in order to protect Lea. And that would most likely be the origin of his beastly berserker state, as well as why Isa became the vessel instead of Lea.

Day 150 ~Fear~

Xion: One more time... please! Saïx: We don't have that much time on our hands. It's clear you were just a failure, after all.

It's important to note that Saïx used the word "失敗作" (shippaisaku) here. It means "failure" or "failed work." Also, there was a slight change in the localization during this conversation. Saïx didn't say they couldn't afford to waste any more chances. He said they couldn't afford to waste any more time. It's subtle, but it's significant.

Xaldin: Ah… If something isn't done before that rose withers, it seems the curse he was placed under won't be lifted. Roxas: Come to think of it, the servant guy said our time left is short. Xaldin: …He did say that… The curse… the Beast's form… the rose… Hehehe… This could be useful.

In English, you miss out on the uncanny similarity between Saïx and the Beast. They're both cursed, they both wish to become human once more, and both are running out of time. The subtext implies that Saïx wanted to complete Kingdom Hearts because he wanted to love and be loved in return. For who could ever love a beast? Saïx even has a weapon called "Werewolf," a beast tied to the full moon.

Day 150: Handling Xion (Saïx) Is it about time the limit of the replica has been reached? I thought the plan was going smoothly, but ultimately, it's just a puppet… So, of course there's been a problem, after all. I completely fail to understand how this puppet can weigh so heavily on Axel and Roxas's minds. Perhaps we should also consider how to deal with Xion going forward.

"The course of true love never did run smooth". Saïx thought the plan was going smoothly, but of course, it's never so easy. Technically, they would be able to complete Kingdom Hearts with just Roxas. As long as they had one Keybalde wielder, Xion wasn't truly needed. Saïx was quite displeased that Axel was treating Xion as protectively as he used to treat him. And due to that, he wanted to dispose of her.

Roxas: Axel, is there something you don't want to lose? Axel: Something I don't want to lose? Why the sudden question? Roxas: I met someone today who has something they don't want to lose. It's something really precious to them. Xaldin said it could become their weakness. I don't have anything like that... Axel: Well, that's obvious since we don't have hearts. Roxas: Do you think so? For example, if we took away Demyx's sitar, he'd probably object. Axel: Well... I suppose that's true. Even without hearts, there are things we don't want to lose. In that case, for us Nobodies, the things we don't want to lose might be our past memories. Past memories create the things we don't want to lose.

The memories Roxas made since joining the Organization were all he had. That's what he couldn't bear to lose. But what Axel couldn't bear to lose were the memories of his past. His human days. On Day 117, he told Xion that his memories were of no use. He used the phrase "役にも" (yaku ni mo). It means "useful" or "helpful." It indicates that something serves a purpose in some practical way.

But again, the word "taisetsuna" was used, which tends to emphasize emotional or sentimental value rather than practical importance. We can probably conclude that what Axel couldn't bear to lose were his memories of Isa. Because Isa was what he was afraid to lose when he was a human. But since Isa changed, memories were all Axel had left.

Day 152 ~The Wrong Button~

"The lunatic, the lover, and the poet are of imagination all compact. One sees more devils than vast hell can hold: That is the madman. The lover, all as frantic." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)

There exists a cultural belief that the full moon is tied to mood swings, also known as the "lunar effect" or "lunar influence". "Xion" sounds like "潮" (shio) which is the Japanese word for "tide". And it is the moon's gravitational effect that has an influence on the tides. Symbolically, it was fitting that Saïx was the one who triggered Xion's mood swing and caused her to doubt her purpose for fighting.

The quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream was spoken by Theseus. He suggests that lunatics, lovers, and poets are all deeply influenced by their imaginations. Their thoughts and perceptions are shaped by the creative and often irrational workings of the mind.

The lunatic perceives imaginary demons and threats that aren't present in reality. His mind is consumed by delusions and irrational fears. Similarly, the lover is described as "frantic," indicating that love can also be a state of heightened emotion and irrationality. The lover's imagination may lead them to idealize their beloved or perceive obstacles that aren't actually there.

Axel: ...Girls are complicated, you know. Roxas: How did you know I was thinking about Xion? Axel: Because you're simple, Roxas. Well, all Nobodies are simple, but... Roxas: Are humans complicated? Axel: More complicated than Nobodies, but girls are even more complicated.

Axel obviously thought that Roxas and Xion had a little lovers' spat. And since Roxas had slowly been developing some kind of feelings for Xion due to the influence of Sora's memories of Kairi, that's probably an accurate assumption. Axel just laughed it off because he thought Roxas's infatuation was making him act paranoid.

Axel called Roxas "単純" (tanjun). It means "simple" or "plain." It can refer to something that is easy to understand, uncomplicated, or straightforward. It can also imply a lack of complexity or sophistication. Additionally, it can be used to describe a person who is straightforward or uncomplicated in their thinking or behavior.

(KH Days Novel) "Is this about the defective thing in our midst?" asked Saïx. "Am I that easy to read?" Axel shrugged. "Yes, because you're completely guileless. You always were." "Excuse me? Were you always such a jerk?" Axel retorted, taking a seat on a shelf across from Saïx.

Axel was always giving Roxas advice on matters of the heart based on his own personal experience. Because this day was about the differences between men and women, it's easy to assume that it wasn't about Saïx. But in the novel, Saïx also calls Axel "単純" (tanjun) after Xion collapsed and he was in a bad mood.

In many cultures, the moon is seen as a symbol of feminine energy and is associated with emotions, intuition, and the subconscious mind. Saïx has a few weapons named "Selene" and "Artemis". The writers chose two lunar goddesses from Greek mythology, even though they could easily have chosen male lunar deities such as Chandra or Thoth. This was to associate him with femininity.

Saïx's default weapon called "Lunatic". He also has a weapon called "Crescent" which is part of the Wild Gear set. It is shaped like the symbol for Black Moon Lilith (⚸). She is associated with primal feminine energy and the shadow self. She embodies the darker aspects of the feminine psyche and represents the shadow side of femininity, including themes of rage, jealousy, and vengefulness.

Day 171 ~Love~

Xaldin: However… the notion of love for a beast…is truly foolish. Roxas: Love? …What is love? Xaldin: It refers to the emotions that are budding between those two. Roxas: Emotions… Xaldin: Hmph… The power of love is nonsense. Roxas: The power of love? Is it some kind of special power?

One of the most famous quotes from A Midsummer Night's Dream is spoken by the character Puck. It reflects his observation of the foolishness and irrational behavior of humans, particularly in matters of love and romance. It has become an iconic quote and is often cited in discussions of human folly and the whims of love.

Roxas: What is love? Axel: Huh? Roxas: How can the power of love be born? Axel: Love is a special power that only humans possess. Roxas: Nobodies don't have it? Axel: Those kinds of things require a heart. Roxas: ... ... ...

Roxas wasn't particularly motivated to complete Kingdom Hearts on Day 94. But on this day, he seemed fascinated with the idea that he could love someone when it was complete. Roxas is simple. It's probably safe to assume that his interest in love had to do with Xion.

Axel: It's born only between beings that are special and more than just friends. That's love. Roxas: More than friends... so like best friends? Axel: It's a bit different from best friends... Roxas: Is there a relationship above best friends? Axel: It's not about above or below. Roxas: I don't really understand... Axel: Well, we don't have hearts, so it's irrelevant to us. Roxas: If we had hearts...would we understand? Axel: Once Kingdom Hearts is completed, you'll understand too.

Axel suggested that once Kingdom Hearts was completed, Roxas would also be able to understand love like humans could. The Japanese wording doesn't explicitly state whether Axel himself already understood or not. But based on the subtext, we can probably assume that he already knew what it was like to feel love. He loved his best friend and wanted to experience that feeling again.

Day 171: Project "No.i" (Saïx) Xion failed her mission. If this state continues in the future, it would be better to eliminate this replica and proceed with copying using the next one, which should result in a replica with higher capabilities. After all, "No.i" is part of the initial batch, so there are concerns about its abilities. The current situation could also be perceived as a malfunction. What on earth is Xemnas thinking?

On this day, Saïx was more determined than ever to dispose of Xion. Of course, as the Shakespeare quotes suggest, he was being entirely irrational and perceiving a threat that wasn't really there.

Day 172 ~Sound of the Surf~

Saïx: Xion is sleeping right now. Even if you go, you won't be able to do anything. Roxas: It's not about whether I can do anything or not! Saïx: Why are you so concerned about such a failure? Roxas: Failure? Are you talking about Xion?

In Carl Jung's psychology, the concept of the mirror is often used metaphorically to represent the relationship between the conscious ego and the unconscious shadow. The shadow encompasses traits, desires, impulses, and emotions that individuals find unacceptable or shameful, and that they may be repressing. That's why Aqua's shadow-self emerged from the magic mirror.

Jung proposed that individuals often project their unconscious shadow qualities onto others, perceiving them as externalized aspects of themselves. Like a mirror, other people and external events reflect back to us aspects of our own psyche that we may not be aware of or are reluctant to acknowledge.

Saïx: Regardless of what happens to it, it's none of your concern. Roxas: Whether it's my concern or not doesn't matter. Saïx: What's the point of worrying about "something that doesn't exist"? Roxas: We're all in the same boat when it comes to things that don't exist.

Xemnas wasn't bothered by Xion's failure to defeat Riku. Saïx simply wanted to dispose of her because he was jealous. So, he projected aspects of himself that he hated onto her. It all gave me the impression that Isa was probably bad at fighting, failed his missions as an apprentice, and relied on Lea to do most of the work for him.

Saïx: Even if Xion were to break, it wouldn't change your position.

Saïx seemed unable to comprehend that Roxas was motivated by emotions and not because of any practical reasons.

Roxas: Saïx called Xion a failure... Axel: ...Xion is less of a failure than I am.

On this day, when Saïx called Xion a "failure", he used the word "出来損ない" (dekisokonai). The literal translation is "poorly made" or "botched," but it is usually used in a figurative sense. It refers to something or someone that is a failure, disappointment, or underachiever. It can be used to describe something that didn't turn out as expected or desired, or someone who hasn't lived up to their potential. Axel would get the sense that Saïx was referring Xion's failure to complete the missions and not necessarily anything more.

"You are to discover the identity of the outsider," he told her. "Those are direct orders from Lord Xemnas. Failure is the same as insubordination. You understand that, don't you?" "Wha…?" Xion had no idea that Xemnas had chosen her for this mission. To the best of her knowledge, Saïx was the one in charge of assigning tasks.

However, in both the novel and manga, Saïx told Xion that Xemnas had personally assigned her the mission and that if she failed, it would be the same as insubordination, which is defined as intentional defiance of authority or refusal to obey orders.

Day 172: The Meaning of Words (Axel) There must be a hidden meaning behind Saïx's words. Why doesn't Xion have the qualifications of an Organization member? Saïx said it is what it looks like. Is he implying that she resembles Naminé in some way? It's hard to believe that there's no connection between Naminé and Xion. But then, whose Nobody is Xion? What is Saïx hiding?

So, there may have been a deeper meaning behind Saïx's usage of the word "failure". It potentially means being a traitor. A recusant. And if Xion were labeled a recusant, she would be eliminated.

Day 193 ~Memories~

Day 193: Dreams, or Memories? (Xion) I finally wake up, just to pass out again? Why? Because I'm a failure? I dreamt the whole while I was out. It was something nostalgic, but what? Why can't I remember? It could be a key memory from my human life. All I can remember is the sound of waves, gentle, in the distance.

In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Helena reflected on how sleep can sometimes provide temporary relief from feelings of sorrow or sadness. Sleep has the ability to close the metaphorical "eye" of sorrow, offering a brief respite from emotional pain. Xion was constantly dreaming about Sora. She wanted to go back "home".

Saïx: It's better for you not to move yet. [...] Roxas is scheduled to go on today's mission with Axel. Your presence is not planned. Xion: I want to go too. I want to limber up a bit. Axel: How about I go as a guardian? Saïx: ... ... ... ...Understood. Do as you please.

Saïx knew what was going on with Xion absorbing Roxas's memories. He knew she was gonna collapse. He only agreed to let them go when Axel offered to go, too. Because he was trying to hurt Axel.

Saïx: In the end, it collapsed again. The failure. Roxas: Don't say it like that...! Axel: Shut your mouth.

Here, Saïx used the word "shippaisaku" again instead of "dekisokonai". Both words refer to something that is considered a failure or disappointment, but there are subtle differences in nuance. "Dekisokonai" can be used broadly to describe various types of failures or shortcomings, such as Xion failing her missions.

"Shippaisaku" is more commonly used to describe unsuccessful creations or projects. It gives off a dehumanizing feel, like you're talking about a thing rather than a person. Axel was very angry, and not just because Saïx called Xion a bad name. That word was triggering to him. After all, the day was called "Memories".

Subject X and Notes on Mental Experimentation 2 During the initial experiment, several candidates were tested, but they all broke down mentally. I did not want anything to happen to her, my special subject. In the midst of all this, it was revealed to my mentor that I had used numerous subjects for testing and repeated experiments. The results of the tests were severely criticized, the research was terminated, and the results destroyed. Not only that, but she disappeared along with the release of many subjects. Where are the subjects now?

Xehanort used "特別な" (tokubetsu na) to refer to Subject X. It means "special" or "unique." It refers to something or someone that is distinctive, extraordinary, or holds significance beyond the ordinary. It implies a sense of rarity, importance, or exceptional value. Roxas and Xion were both special, too. They were all objectively special.

Axel also used "tokubetsu na" to describe how love is only born between people who are special to each other. Isa was probably not considered special like Subject X was. In an objective sense, he was probably considered to be pretty worthless, actually. He was only "special" in a subjective sense because of Lea's feelings for him.

Saïx: ...You've changed. What happened in Castle Oblivion? Are you ready to discard the past?

That was Saïx's only source of value, and he thought Xion threatened to take that away from him. He thought Axel changed because the past was no longer important to him. But that wasn't the case.

Axel: You passed, Sora. You have the power. The power to walk through Castle Oblivion. Guided by memories burned into your heart and precious memories on the brink of being forgotten, you will encounter precious people. Goofy: Can we meet the king? Axel: Think again about who is the most precious to you. The more precious the feelings, the deeper they are hidden in the heart— unable to be recalled. Sora, you must have such memories too. Sora: Me too? Axel: You've lost sight of the light in the darkness, to the point where you've forgotten that you've lost it. [...] But I'll give you a warning. When sleeping memories awaken, you may not be yourself anymore.

The romantic subtext between Roxas and Xion was quite obvious due to their connections to Sora and Kairi. Xion was precious to Roxas because he possessed Sora's most precious memories, which were those of Kairi, the girl who was special to him.

The romantic subtext between Axel and Saïx was a lot more subtle, but it was still there. Axel's memories of Isa were equivalent to Sora's memories of Kairi. After Castle Oblivion, he remembered his most precious person and he was always projecting those precious memories onto Xion. And that was what caused him to change.

Roxas: ...Are you worried about Xion too? Axel: Of course.

During her dream, Xion was reliving the moment when Sora turned the Keyblade on himself and turned into a Heartless. It was probably the same type of situation with Axel. He seemed to be reminded of something with the sleeping Xion, similar to how the sleeping Roxas reminded Xemnas of when Ventus collapsed. Isa was probably imprisoned in the Chamber of Repose after the failed experiment, similar to Subject X when they first met her.

Roxas: It feels kind of strange. Axel: What do you mean? Roxas: Axel, you hate annoying things, right?

In the localization, Roxas said Axel hates "complications". But I don't think that got the intended message across. Roxas used the word "面倒くさい" (mendokusai). It means "troublesome" or "bothersome". It is often used to describe tasks, situations, or people that are annoying or inconvenient. And that idea fits more with Axel's catchphrase where he always gets stuck with the unpleasant jobs.

Axel: Hey, Roxas... Why do you think we're eating ice cream together every day in that place? Roxas: ...Huh? Axel: I don't have any use for it. If you think about it normally, it's just a hassle, isn't it? [...] Want me to tell you? It's because we're best friends.

Axel used the word "用" (yō). It has several meanings, including "use," "purpose," or "need." He wanted to emphasize that best friends don't value each other for how useful they are in a practical sense. Eating ice cream together has no objective purpose, but that doesn't matter.

Day 255 ~The Longest Day~

"Things base and vile, holding no quantity, love can transpose to form and dignity. Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind; And therefore is wing'd Cupid painted blind." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)

The above A Midsummer Night's Dream quote is also one of the play's most famous and iconic. And it encapsulates one of the biggest themes of the 358/2 Days narrative. Love is a transformative force that transcends physical appearance and superficial qualities. Love depends not on an objective assessment of appearance or value but rather on an individual perception of the beloved.

The third eye (also called the mind's eye) is an invisible eye, located on the forehead, which provides perception beyond ordinary sight. And I thought it was very interesting that Saïx's scar was located over his third eye, and he was the only one unable to "see" Xion. It does suggest that some sort of mental experimentation was performed.

Axel stared at him as if trying to figure something out and then grinned. "Right, that first week you could barely form a sentence."

The game began with a preview of Day 255, which was called "The Longest Day." The summer solstice, also known as midsummer, marks the longest day of the year and the shortest night, with the sun reaching its highest point in the sky. A Midsummer Night's Dream is set around the time of the summer solstice. The themes of love, transformation, and the blurring of reality and fantasy were heightened by the setting of the summer solstice. And those themes were also present in the narrative of 358/2 Days as well.

(KH Days Novel) The sun sank lower and lower as Axel watched, his mind wandering. If he stared for too long, the image would burn itself into his eyes, visible even after his eyes were closed. A phantom sun. Someone had once told him why sunsets were red… Who was that?

On Day 96 of the novelization, Axel closed his eyes until he could only see the illusion of the sunset in his mind. And he remembered that someone else told him about the red sunset. There's really no one else it could have been but Isa. It was one of the most precious memories sleeping deep in the shadows of Axel's heart.

Roxas: I don't remember anything before joining the Organization, so for the first few days, I was just in a daze. After that, I wanted to remember everything properly. Axel: Yeah, for about the first week, you couldn't even talk properly, and you're still kind of out of it. Roxas: That's harsh! Axel: Hey Roxas, do you know why the sunset is red? Light comes in different colors, and among them, red reaches the farthest distance. That's why. Roxas: Why are you so proud of that, Axel?

Axel looked off the side before telling Roxas about the red sunset, indicating it was something he'd just remembered in that moment. And his Japanese voice acting during that scene was so nostalgic and wistful. Again, based on subtext, I suspect it was probably the first thing Isa said to him after he became lucid again after his mental breakdown. Which was why Roxas's comment made him remember.

Roxas: Seriously, where is she?

And in Japanese, the day has another meaning. "長い日" (nagai hi) refers to a day that feels exceptionally long or seems to drag on due to various factors such as boredom, exhaustion, or a heavy workload. In Axel's case, it was because he was dreading telling Roxas the news.

276 ~Disorder~

Xion: Is it that I'm not supposed to exist? Axel: Well, what do you want to do, Xion? Xion: I want…I want to be with you two. Roxas: Then come back with us. Xion: I can't… Not the way I am now. But…what would it take for me to be like you?

In the above quote, Demetrius is addressing Helena, who is convinced that she is awake and experiencing reality. However, Demetrius questions the nature of their current state, suggesting that they might still be asleep and dreaming. This uncertainty reflects the topsy-turvy world created by the interference of the fairies, particularly Puck, who has enchanted the characters with a love potion, causing them to fall in and out of love with each other.

Roxas: I got to go to the beach today for my mission. There was this girl there who looked kind of like Xion…but I couldn't get close enough to tell for sure. I probably imagined it. To be honest, I'm not even sure today's mission really happened. I feel like I just woke up from a dream or something. This is gonna sound crazy, but you know how we promised each other we'd all go to the beach? Well, I think I only saw her there because I wanted her to be there.

Metaphorically, the quote highlights the theme of perception versus reality and the blurred lines between the waking world and the realm of dreams. It suggests that what appears to be real may actually be illusory, and that true understanding can be elusive in a world filled with magical enchantment and shifting emotions.

Day 299 ~Sora~

Saïx: I see. And what about the man in the black coat? Xemnas: Do not allow any further contact with Roxas. He is nothing more than an impurity hindering Xion becoming a more perfect being. Saïx: Then everything will proceed according to the original plan…

"Things base and vile, holding no quantity, love can transpose to form and dignity." Xion was nothing but a blank puppet and an imaginary number with no quantity. She only took on a form to the perceiver because of Sora's most precious memories within Roxas.

(KH Days Novel) I just did what I thought was the best thing at the time. For Roxas, for Xion, for the Organization—and for Isa. But most of all for me.

The idea behind "love is blind" is that love can create a kind of emotional blindness, where individuals are unable to see reality objectively. When someone is deeply in love, they may be unable or unwilling to see any faults or imperfections in their partner, even if those flaws would be apparent to an outside observer. This can sometimes lead to situations where people remain in unhealthy or toxic relationships because they are unable to see the negative consequences or red flags due to their intense feelings of love.

Axel: Was this really the right decision? Saïx: For you to say something like that... between that puppet and Roxas, which one is more important to you? Let me change the question. Between your petty friendship game and Roxas's disappearance, which one is more important to you? Everything has returned to normal. It must be the right decision, right? Even Xemnas is annoyed by the recent change in plans. We need to restore everything to normal. It's for our goal, too, Lea.

This time, when Saïx used the word "important" he used "大事な" (daijina) instead of "大切な" (taisetsuna). Both words mean "important" and are often used interchangeably. However, there are subtle differences. As I've said "taisetsuna" is used to emphasize emotional or sentimental value. And typically, "daijina" conveys the sense of something being important in a practical or utilitarian sense.

Saïx didn't seem particularly threatened by Axel's relationship with Roxas. Probably because Axel wasn't put in the position where he had to worry or be as protective of Roxas, the way he was with Xion. And Saïx also knew that Roxas was important to their shared goal of completing Kingdom Hearts. So, Saïx valued him in a utilitarian sense. In essence, he was telling Axel to choose between Xion or him.

Saïx was telling Axel, the assassin, to do the dirty work of eliminating Xion for him. So that their original plan could get back on its smooth course. "Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind." This cutscene was directed to look like the scene from KH2, when Sora closed his eyes and could see Riku in his mind, looking the way he truly was meant to look.

Day 352 ~Sunset~

(KH Days Novel) "How are you feeling, Roxas?" "…Same as always." Saïx smirked at the reply—and a chill ran through Axel at how vicious it was. "I have an urgent mission especially for you and your Keyblade," said Saïx. "There's a fearsome Heartless that's surfaced in Halloween Town."

In Japanese, Saïx's moniker is "月に舞う" or "Demon Dancing in the Moon". The word used for "demon" was "魔人" (majin). "魔" (ma) means "demon" or "evil spirit," and "人" (jin) means "person". Together, "majin" refers to a person with demonic or supernatural qualities.

Saïx has a pair of same-shaped weapons called "King of the Night" and "Queen of the Night". Dracula is sometimes referred to as "King of the Night," such as in the Castlevania series. Many legends and works of fiction depict vampires as being more powerful and bloodthirsty during the full moon. And while Saïx was always unpleasant, Day 352 is when he showed a truly evil side to his personality. He set Roxas and Xion up to kill each other in Halloween Town underneath the full moon until Axel intervened.

Saïx: Can't you just let things run their course?

"So quick bright things come to confusion." Lysander was reflecting on the transience of happiness and how quickly joyful moments can turn into chaos or confusion. Lysander's observation underscores the theme of instability and unpredictability in matters of love and human relationships, which is a recurring motif throughout the play.

Day 352: What I Must Do (Xion) I love Roxas and Axel. I think that's what I feel, but I bet Saïx would laugh, saying it's just false emotions fabricated from memory. But I loved spending time with Roxas and Axel on top of the clock tower. I wish we could stay like this, the three of us, forever. But it has to end now. I'll never forget today's sunset. Even if Roxas and Axel forget, I won't forget.

Xion used the word "好き" (suki) instead of "愛" (ai), which was the word used on Day 171. She certainly loved Axel and Roxas, which was why she made the decision to disappear at the Beast's Castle. But I think the writers were trying to emphasize that it was different than what she felt for Sora. Xion was the personification of the memories in the shadows of Sora's heart. She was his shadow self. She didn't want to say goodbye to her best friends, but she also yearned to watch the sunset with the person she loved in the "ai" sense.

Xion: A beautiful sunset. Even though it's the same sunset I've always seen, it looks especially beautiful today. I wish we could always be together like this, the three of us. […] Axel: What's important isn't meeting up every day— Xion: —It's thinking about each other even when we're not together, right?

Axel was definitely lying when he said he'd never seen a Winner ice cream stick before. The fact that their time together as a trio was coming to an end is what made him remember it in the first place. And he used the same words from Day 96. Only that time, he did feel sentimental towards Roxas and Xion. But Axel was trying to be the mature realistic adult in the situation.

Axel: If somebody doesn't break it, someday, you will no longer be you. Roxas will no longer be Roxas. Roxas: I am me. Still the best friend of Axel. Xion is also my important best friend! Axel: No, that's not it. It's not about that, Roxas. Roxas: Enough. Axel: That's not it, Roxas.

The theme "love is blind" also pertained to Roxas's relationship with Xion. To some extent, Axel was able to view the situation with Xion more objectively than Roxas. He could tell that she was a puppet that was absorbing his power and was dangerous. So, the next day, he let her run away from the Organization. He tried to explain the situation logically to Roxas, but Roxas couldn't accept it, and ran away too.

Day 355 ~Unsaid, Unheard~

"Because they copied my powers, the Keyblade's power, and then they didn't need me anymore—is that it?" Roxas spat. He couldn't bring himself to confirm it. "I guess you felt the same way, huh, Axel?" At those words, something wrenched in his chest, and he could hardly breathe. No, not me. I wasn't thinking like that. I would never. "That's not true. You—you're my best friend." The words spilled out of him.

More than anything, Axel wanted to emphasize that best friends don't value each other for how useful they are. And that no doubt had some connection to his human memories with Isa.

(KH Days Novel) "We don't need them both. Just one. And pretending won't change it." We, who? Axel wanted to ask, but he held it in, along with a bitter laugh. He wasn't sure if that "we" meant Organization XIII or just Saïx and himself. Axel realized how great the rift was between how he remembered past and what he saw now.

Saïx may very well have been possessed by some soul/mind that had other motivations subconsciously driving him to complete Kingdom Hearts at all costs. But all the subtext indicated that his conscious motivations were very simple. He wanted to complete Kingdom Hearts to get his heart back. He wanted the power of Kingdom Hearts because he wanted the power to love and be loved in return.

Day 356: Unforeseen Circumstances (Saïx) Lea, what did you ultimately want? The plan we decided on, entering the Organization together... No, that's already just wishful thinking. Everything has changed. You, and me too…

It would have been quite a twist if Axel and Saïx's big plan was simply being together forever eating ice cream every single day and watching the sunset. And there is a lot of evidence in the original text to suggest that that was indeed their plan. I also found it interesting that in Axel's Report from Day 118, he denied that he changed. But Saïx acknowledged in his final report that he had changed.

Comparing the Organisation members when they were human to when they were in the Organisation, apart from Xehanort, only Isa and Braig have differently-shaped ears and differently-coloured eyes - why is this? Nomura: It's a question of whether or not they're deeply connected to Xehanort. In Braig's case, comparing the scene where he's injured in his battle with Terra and flares up at Xehanort, his appearance afterwards changes, which hints that something happened with Xehanort in between. (BBS Ultimania, March 2010)

Xion was a puppet made to duplicate Sora's powers. And over time, she began to appear as him instead of Kairi. And the thirteen vessels were puppets made to be duplicates of Xehanort. After being experimented on and turned into a vessel, Isa would have noticed certain physical changes such as the golden eyes and pointy ears.

By the way, Braig's dealings with Master Xehanort in Birth by Sleep make sense, he was to become a vessel. Nomura: There is a certain reason for Braig to proudly exclaim, "As for me, I'm already half Xehanort." Isa (Saix) is included too. I think you'll understand the details about their circumstances eventually. What happens to the hearts of those who have had Master Xehanort's heart planted within them? Nomura: They'll gradually be swallowed by it. As for Master Xehanort, he plans to control them completely. The planted parts of the heart are captured rather than disappear. (Famitsu, May 2012)

And maybe Isa didn't want to lose his identity and become someone else. So, he thought it would be better for him to not exist anymore.

Day 356 ~Role~

(KH Days Novel) "How do you know that?" Axel demanded. "Everyone thinks they're right…" "This is right," Xion said firmly. "It's better this way." Axel hated that argument. Nothing was better any which way. All it came down to was what you wanted to do and what you didn't. He'd learned that lesson back when he had a heart. "So it's better for you to disappear?" he protested.

Because I definitely got the impression that Axel was reliving a situation from his past that was extremely similar to the situation with Xion. And that's what the novelization hinted at, too.

In Japanese, the title for this day is "役目" (yakume). It means "duty" or "role". It refers to a task, responsibility, or function that someone is expected to fulfill or perform. And it's a reference to when Axel says, "The dirty work always seems to fall on me."

Xion: …No holding back now, Axel. Axel: Stop fucking around! Don't underestimate me! I've made up my mind! No matter how many times you guys try to run away, I'll always be there to bring you back!

I don't think the English localization truly captured Axel's anger here. In Japanese, he says, "ふざけんな" (fuzakenna). It's a very direct way of saying "Don't mess with me". Next was "てめーナメてんじゃねーぞ" (teme na meten jane zo). It's a very informal and rather aggressive way of saying "Don't underestimate me" or "Don't look down on me." It's a confrontational expression used to assert oneself and demand respect. The phrase contains strong language (teme), and it comes across as rude. So, swear words are very fitting here.

Xion was a mirror that reflected the memories of those who were bound to Sora in some way. Even Xigbar was able to see her as Ventus at times. When Axel said that he'd bring Xion back, he said "you both". In Japanese, he said "おまえら" (omaera) which means "you guys". It's specifically plural in both languages.

Axel yells at Xion, "I'll bring you back no matter how many times it takes", but why does the word "you" refer to multiple people? Nomura: That's still a secret as well. But Axel's determination here of "bring you back no matter how many times it takes" is connected to when he said he would bring Roxas back in Kingdom Hearts II. (Famitsu, August 2008)

Nomura said that the reason why Axel was referring to multiple people in that scene was a secret. It wasn't referring to Roxas, but the determination Axel felt toward bringing him back in KH2 was related. And Axel said he'd bring Roxas back even if he had to knock him unconscious. During Axel's showdown with Xion, did she actually take on the appearance of Isa to him? Is that why he could only stare down at the ground in that moment?

Lea said the same lines, "Why do I always get the icky jobs," and "I'll always be there to bring you back," to Xion in KH Days when he brought her back. Does he remember that? Nomura: The nature of the being known as Xion and all memories to do with her were erased, but he would remember other things. (KH3D Ultimania, May 2012)

In KH3D, Lea didn't remember Xion. But it was strongly implied that he did remember making that promise to Isa. Isa was probably one of the test subjects taken away by Ansem the Wise. He didn't want to be a puppet of Xehanort, in either a literal or figurative sense. Lea probably had to bring him back to join the Organization by force. That's why Axel always agreed to do any of the dirty work necessary, even though Saïx was certainly capable of doing it himself.

Day 357 ~Tears~

Roxas: Did I...hurt you? Xion: No, I'm the one who's trying to disappear on my own. I didn't want to become what Xemnas wanted, so I will go to Sora's side. I just want to return to where I belong. But I have one request. Please release the captured hearts and Kingdom Hearts. Roxas: Release...Kingdom Hearts? Xion: It seems I can't do it anymore. But you can't fulfill Xemnas's wishes. Goodbye, Roxas. Let's meet again. I'm glad I got to see you and Axel. You two are best friends. Don't forget that. Roxas: No… Let's go eat ice cream together as a trio again, Xion.

The flower tatarian aster is known in Japan as the "紫苑" (shion). In Hanakotoba, the Japanese language of flowers, it means "I'll never forget you." Roxas and Xion's Mystery Gear was called "Aubade". An aubade is a form of poetry or music that focuses on the theme of lovers parting at dawn. It typically depicts a scene where lovers must separate as day breaks, often evoking feelings of longing, melancholy, or anticipation. Day 357 was called "Tears". It referred to Roxas's tears when Xion disappeared leaving only a seashell behind.

Day 357: To My Best Friend (Axel) Roxas is gone... Leaving just the stick labeled "Winner." Typical of him. I bet tomorrow or something we'll get orders to bring him back, but leaving this behind... it really feels like the end, doesn't it? Roxas, are we still the three of us...? Well, no, just two now. Let's get some ice cream again. That's what being best friends is all about.

But it was also referring to Axel when he opened the envelope with the ice cream stick in it. "Queen of the Night" is named after a flower known as "月下美人". It literally means "beauty under the moonlight". The flower's symbolism is derived from its short flowering time. It only blooms one night a year, usually during a full moon. The flower's meaning is to enjoy the small moments because they do not last. In flower language, it represents fleeting beauty and fleeting love.

The word for "beauty" is "美人" (bijin). It means "beautiful person" and usually refers to women. Generally, "bijin" is more commonly associated with feminine beauty in Japanese language and culture. While it can technically be used to describe individuals of any gender who are considered beautiful, the term often carries connotations of traditional or stereotypical feminine beauty standards. "Majin" and "bijin" highlight the vast dichotomy between Saïx and Isa.

Axel: If you want, I'll bring you back too. Saïx: The marks under your eyes are gone, aren't they? Axel: Yeah, I don't need 'em anymore. Saïx: I taught you, who used to be such a crybaby, the charm of inverted tears. Axel: Shut up. Get out of here quickly or I'll kick your ass tomorrow!

In KH3, Saïx noticed that he had a Winner ice cream stick before he brought up the subject of Axel's tear marks. He said that he taught Lea that spell and used the word "おまじない" (omajinai). It means "spell" or "charm." It refers to a ritual or action performed with the belief that it will bring good luck or protect against misfortune.

This subject seemed to embarrass Axel. Lea was his other self, the weak crybaby that he was ashamed of and didn't like to acknowledge. In other words, his shadow. Perhaps back then Isa was trying to be the realistic mature adult, while Lea was the childish one who insisted they would be together forever? And perhaps a Winner ice cream stick was the memento Isa wanted to leave behind so Lea would always keep him in his thoughts?

I don't have a high opinion about the way KH3 handled Axel and Saïx. I understand that there wasn't enough time to show their backstory, so their relationship was sidelined to focus more on other characters. There was still a lot of romantic subtext, but the KH3 team did seem a bit uncomfortable with how utterly gay Saïx was for Axel. So, they tried to retcon his motivations to be entirely about Subject X. Which I think was very disrespectful to the story being told in 358/2 Days.

Day 359 ~The First Day~

"If we shadows have offended, think but this and all is mended: That you have but slumbered here while these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, no more yielding but a dream." (William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream)

The quote "If we shadows have offended" was spoken by Puck in the final scene of the play. He addresses the audience directly, acknowledging that the events of the play, including the magical transformations, misunderstandings, and romantic entanglements, may have caused offense or confusion.

Xion: Roxas, don't be sad. I came from you and Sora. I am you…the same way that I am Sora. You'll forget me, but the memories themselves will never go away. Memories of you and me will always be together…forever, inside him.

By referring to themselves as "shadows," Puck implies that the characters and events of the play are like fleeting illusions or figments of imagination. The quote also serves as a kind of epilogue or closing statement, in which Puck reassures the audience that all will be "mended," or set right, if they view the play's events as nothing more than a fantastical dream experienced during a slumber.

[the-fiction-witch]

Reading

Media The Queens Gambit

Character Benny Watts

Couple Benny X Reader

Rating Smut

I sat in the darkness of the grey basement. The Apartment is cold as the heating hasn't worked in a week. The Wind and rain battered the little windows above me luckily, no water had found its way inside yet. The lights were all off but the small lamp beside me, with no other items powdered on left the basement with a gentle silence. My breathing was all that broke it, and the occasional flicks of my fingers against the paper pages. My body snuggled up into Benny's brown leather chair, a black and white blanket over my legs, the tip of my nail between my teeth as I read the words. 

'He seized her swiftly by the ponytail, thrusting her body against the frigid stone. He united their bodies pulverising forcefully against her delicate innocent form. He came tight his breath sizzling on her neck. 

"You believe you can get away from me, Princess?" His hushed vocals growled, 

She spread her lips but couldn't create words, as if his profound ocean-blue eyes had stolen her voice. 

"You," He said his finger stroking down her cheek to push her chin up to their lips sat only mere inches from one another, "Belong to me." He snarled,

"P-P-Prince Alon..." She gagged her body quivering and trembling against the stone.

"You're mine princess." He asserted, "And I intend to have you."

"Have me?" She interrogated 

"Right here. Right now." He declared, "You're so defended chastity, shall be pilfered. You're angelic body mine to command." 

"Prince Alon Please I-" She began,

"So Precious, so charming, so innocent." He sneered, "Though your sentiment is not what I desire." 

He shut the void between her shoving his lips to hers, the taste of his salty lips against hers, his body thrusted against her letting her feel his throbbing -'

"I'm home," Benny called as he came through the front door with a brown paper bag of groceries in his hand,

"I'm not doing anything!" I yelped in shock as his call woke me from my book, out of fear I slammed my book shut. "Hello..."

"Hi," He chuckled at my reaction, he kicked off his shoes and set the groceries on the kitchen counter. "You alright?"

"Fine." I gulped 

"You sure?" He asked setting his hat and jacket on the rack by the door, 

"Yes."

"Mhm..." He nodded as he leant his elbows on the stair railing, "Not sure I'd wanna be attending your class on 'How to now look suspicious' Y/n," 

"What's suspicious, I'm not suspicious, nothing about this is suspicious, no one is suspicious, if anything you're acting suspicious!" 

He simply cocked his him, cocked his eyebrow and glared at me, "What are you reading there y/n?"

"Nothing..."

"Y/n?"

"I uhhh I can't read!"

"You can't read?"

"No."

"I've been your boyfriend for five years I know you can read." 

"Uhhhhhh..."

"What book are you reading?" he asked coming closer,

"What book? where? I uh I don't have any books? I uhh I've never seen one. I don't even own a book."

"What's that in your hand then?"

"Uhhhh... Sandwich."

"Okay, take a bite of your tasty sandwich."

"I uhhh... I don't want to right now." 

"No, no I insist take a bite, I wouldn't want you not to enjoy your sandwich on account of me."

"I uhhh uhhhh don't like this type of sandwich."

"Then why did you make it?"

"... Hilcuinations?" 

"Then why do you have it in your lap?"

"I don't," I said 

"Give me the book Y/n."

"No!" I yelled as I tried to hide it under the blanket, but Benny was smarter than that and we began a playful if not a little aggressive fight for my book, 

"What are you reading y/n? What are you reading?" He smirked as we battled for the book, "Ha!" He yelled as he managed to grab it from me,

"Benny! Give it back!"

"What is this?" He chuckled, "A Vast Ocean of Love? What is this?"

"Nothing!"

"What the- What!" He chuckled, "Prince Alon forced Princess Guinevere onto the rocks and pulled her hair enough to compel a moan to leave her lips!"  

"Benny!" 

"Ohh, My God! His long shimmering tail slithered through the water towards Princess Guinevere his hand stroking his throbbing- Ohh god!" 

"Benny! Give it!" I yelled, 

"Where did you even get this?" he asked putting it high up as he read,

"None of your business," I said jumping to try and reach it, 

"Ohh my my," He cooed, as he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his chest, "My naughty little girl," he smirked as he rubbed his nose on my own, "You like this kinda stuff?"

"Ironicly." I snapped taking my book back and pouting,

"Ironicly? Why don't I believe that?" he smirked as he wrapped his arms around me again and pulled my back into his chest, his hand slipped under my jeans, 

"Benny!" I argued as his hand slipped into my jeans and my panties,

"Ohhhh... You really liked that didn't you?" he smirked as his hand began to rub on my clit and slipped inside me,

"Ughh!"

"Awww, my you're soaked Y/n. You really like this dirty book?"

"Benny!" I yelled and forced his hand away as I moved to sit in the chair, "You read penthouse sometimes, leave me alone." 

"Yeah for the articles."

"Yeah, the articles." I glared, 

"Even so, only when we weren't dating darling." He laughed, "Why would I need to read some smutty penthouse magazine when I have you?" He smiled and sat on the chair with me and he kissed my temple, "And I'm not judging if you wanna read some smutty books about, Some Sexy Mermen. You go ahead I'm not stopping you." 

"You don't mind?"

"No, You wanna read it you read it." he smiled, "Just... come to me when you finish the chapter," he winked as he got up to go put the groceries away,

"Why?" I blushed as I got up and followed him 

"Ohh you know..." he smirked as he grabbed my hair and forced me up against the fridge closing the gap between us, he stroked down my cheek and picked my chin up to look him in the eye, "You're mine, princess." He growled with a sly smirk, "And I intend to have you." 

"....uuuughhhhhh," I whined or moaned or I don't know what noise came out of me as my knees gave out, my legs felt like jelly and my body slipped down till I fit the floor. 

"Would you like that?" he chuckled and looked down at my body as I now lay on the floor, 

"Yes Please, Benny!" 

[bellafragolina]

Hey! Now that the requests are open, can I request a raihan, Leon, and piers reaction to their s/o being a former champion?

Also, you're. So. Fuckin. Sweet. I can't 😭

Omg!! You’re so fucking sweet!! I'm blushing, you're the sweet one here!!!

🍓🍓🍓

Raihan:

Raihan invites you to the World Championship to cheer him on. You agreed, but you had this shit-eating grin on your face the whole way there. It's not until people swarm you guys at the stadium, many fans of Raihan, but many also fans of you, that he realizes something hinky is going on!

Your fans call you the Champion of Kalos, beloved and adored for many years before you were eventually beaten out of the position. Hearing this, Raihan stares you down. Is this why you asked him not to post photos of you two? So he wouldn't discover who you were before this moment? Your laugh confirms this was your prank, and he makes sure to take as many photos as he can with you during the championship. But look out! He plans on crushing you during the tournament!

Leon:

You get recognized while out on a date with Leon. It’s strange for him, to be on the opposite side of this scenario. He stands awkwardly at your side as the girl bounces and squeals over you and your legacy that you left in Alola. She compliments you, shyly asks for pictures and an autograph, and even shows you her Pokémon for you to give all of them a pep talk with your own team. It’s boggling to Leon, but he’s instantly excited to bond with you over this new discovery

You admit to him that you used to be the champion in Alola, but left the region for new opportunities after getting beaten. And you found something even greater. Sentimentalities aside, he’s super interested in your team and your time as a champion. You tell him of your reign, the ups and down, the funny stuff and the sad stuff, the bittersweetness of your defeat. Leon listens to it all, and when his defeat comes later, he remembers what you told him, and he takes it all better. He can’t thank you enough for it.

Piers:

Piers is used to being hounded by fans, and he’s not a big fan of it himself. But seeing you fluster as a small child awes of the “former champion of Unova” makes him smile. Sure, he didn’t know you were the former champion, but your blush and shy smile as the kid begs for pictures, for an autograph, to see your star team, it eases the sting of you keeping it from him. He’s sure you probably have your reasons for not telling him yet.

And you do. You admit to Piers that you used to be Champion but you maybe. . . crumbled under the pressure. You retired when you noticed your health taking a decline due to the pressures of being champion, so you left on a more sour note than you would’ve preferred. You were going to tell Piers, but. . . you were a little scared. But Piers understands, and he’s so proud of you. It’s hard to put your health above your passions like that, and he thinks you’re very brave. But he would love a battle with you, if you’re able? You no doubt have some skill, and he’d like to test it out, champ

🍓🍓🍓

The Galar trio, the bffs, the triad of trouble. I love these boys so so much

~Renee

[ijustwanttoreadfanfiction]

Friendly Sex - Chapter 9 - The Calm

We're back baby! Chapter 10 will definitely be up at some point this week but I'm not going to put a time limit on it in case I get bogged down with life etc. Thank you once again to everyone who has liked, reblogged, commented, and messaged you are all actual 'sweethearts'.

Chapter warnings: MDI (18+ only), explicit language, explicit sexual content, p in v sex, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, over use of pet names, sex without a condom (reader is on the pill), creampie.

_______________________________________________

Your dad picks you up from Indianapolis Airport just after 6am the following morning, holding you tightly for a good 20 minutes before you both could pull yourselves together, and get back on the road. 

“I didn’t even get to say a proper goodbye to the twins.” You mumble tearfully, forehead resting against the passenger window.

“That’s not your fault sprout. That goddamn Philip, if I'd have been there I'd have laid his ass out.” Your dad seethes, and you can't help but smile, your dad is a good ten years older than Philip, slightly overweight with a heart condition, but you’d still bet money on him. “First thing I’m going to do when we get home is call your mother and give her a piece of my mind.”

“Dad, it’s not worth it.” You say tiredly. “She’s made her choice, and it’s not me.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t pick you a better person to be your mom, kiddo.” He sighs sadly, patting you on the cheek.

You drift off for a while, the gentle rocking of the car soothing along with the quiet radio, it's not until you're 20 minutes outside of town that you wake up properly, stretching as best you can in the cramped car. Your dad is whistling quietly along to John Denver, as you pass the sign for Forest Hills Trailer Park, you wonder what Eddie is up to, thinking about how he talked you down last night.

You told him you missed him, it was a brutally honest moment, never expecting him to return the sentiment. You supposed it was natural to miss someone when you had spent just over a month with them, but you knew it ran deeper than that, you could have called anyone last night but you needed Eddie.

You finally pull onto the drive, the weight of yesterday feeling stronger again, you’re exhausted from all the tears, the pain of your mother’s rejection, the sleepless night in the airport.

Your dad takes your bag out of the trunk, unlocking the door, you toe off your sneakers and notice a fishing rod and tackle box to the side, suddenly remembering your Dad’s plans for the long weekend; fishing at Patoka Lake with his buddies.

“Oh Dad, I'm sorry, you were supposed to be on your fishing trip!" You cry feeling awful.

"Hey, don't worry about it sprout, there'll be plenty of other trips over the summer." He reasons, dumping your bag down. "Besides, you're more important right now."

"But you've been looking forward to it for months. Why don’t you call Dale? You can still make it up there. I’ll be ok on my own.” You say earnestly,

“I dunno kiddo.” He says scratching his head. “You being on your own after last night doesn’t sit right with me.”

“Well how about I call Robin? See if she wants to stay over?” Knowing damn well Robin wouldn’t be the person you were going to actually call. You could see the turmoil in your Dad’s eyes, you sigh hugging him round the middle.

“Dad please go fishing, I just need a girl’s night, ice cream, crying, watching Grease.” That did it, and you couldn’t help but smile as he tensed in your hold, your dad hated Grease.

“You sure sprout?” He asks, hands practically itching for the fishing pole.

“Positive.”

____________________________________________________

You do feel a small twinge of guilt at your white lie as you wave your dad off, but it quickly evaporates into a strange sense of excitement and anticipation at the idea of having Eddie in your house. You rush to the phone in the kitchen, hopping up onto the counter as you listen to the rings, cord twirled tight about your hand.

“Hello?” A gruff much older voice than Eddie’s answers, this must be the illusive Wayne, or rather the Wayne you’ve been tactically avoiding.

“Oh - uh - hi Mr Munson, my name is Y/n, I’m a - friend of Eddie’s, is he around?” You don’t know why you’re stammering so much, although it might be because the inappropriate part of your brain is screaming ‘Hi Mr Munson, I’m booty calling your nephew, also we’ve banged on your couch - sorry.’

“You wanna speak to Eddie and you’re a girl?” He asks, sounding surprised and it throws you for a loop.

“Um - last time I checked, yes Sir.” You mumble, laughing awkwardly.

“You’re a girl and you’re calling for Eddie?” He clarifies again. “Alright - he’s outside, let me get him.”

The line goes silent for a moment but then you can hear Wayne call something out and Eddie’s voice getting closer.

“- jeez Wayne, why you gotta be so - Sweetheart?” He’s out of breath.

“Hi.” You say simply.

“You ok? You home? Are you safe?” He asks rapidly and you wonder if he’s been worrying about you all night, it made your heart do a funny flip.

“I’m fine Ed’s, I crashed at the airport and caught a flight out just before 4am, I got home about an hour ago.” You reassure him, hearing him exhale heavily.

“You had me so scared last night.” He mutters.

“Yeah, it was intense.” You agree, wiping your clammy palms on your jeans, now feeling nervous. “So, uh I was wondering and you can say no, but my dad has gone fishing for the weekend, did you maybe wanna come over and -” 

“- yes.” Eddie jumps in before you can finish. “Uh, sorry, yeah I’d love to come over, if that’s cool?”

“Yeah it’s cool.” You say smiling, swinging your legs slightly against the counter.

“What time do you want me?” He asks. A loaded question.

Whilst your urge to see Eddie is strong you look like shit, desperately needing to sleep, shower and get groceries.

“Dinnertime? Does six work?”

“It works, see you then princess.”

___________________________________________________

You had briefly called Robin in between your nap and going to the store, filling her in on the events in Chicago, and that Eddie was coming round for the evening. But it seemed you weren’t the only one who went through some shit last night.

“-come again?” You ask, ears ringing slightly.

“Steve and Nancy had a big fight yesterday.” She sighs, and you can hear her pacing in the background.

“What about?” You ask, biting at your thumb.

“He didn’t really say, well more he wasn’t in a fit state to say, he was hammered by

the time I got to him. But if I deciphered his slurs correctly, Nancy had booked plane tickets to go and see Jonathon next weekend without telling Steve.”

“Shit.” You breathe, sitting down on your bed. “I mean maybe she just forgot to tell him?” You offer weakly.

“Doubtful. Either way it sounds like they both said some pretty hurtful things to each other, I think they might be on a break.” She says seriously.

You felt dizzy, you had left Hawkins for all of 24 hours, everything was bright and breezy, you came back and Steve and Nancy are on a break?

“So, Eddie was a lifeline yesterday huh?” She asks, snapping you back to the present.

“Yeah.” You say quietly, mind reeling. “He was really sweet.”

“What’s your plan for tonight?”

“Uh, spaghetti.” You mumble, shaking your head slightly to clear Steve’s image from your head.

“- and?” She presses.

“And spaghetti, Rob.” You laugh wryly.

“Well, whatever you crazy kids are calling it, be safe!” Robin teases, and you flush.

“Ok, bye, Robin, hanging up now!”

“No - wait! Call me tomor-” You put the phone down, running your hand across your face, Steve could be single. Could be, but his track record said otherwise, and his voice from last month was clear as a bell ‘-me and Nance, we always find our way back to each other. I can be myself around her, you know? No bullshit, it’s easy.’ 

“It’s a blip.” You mutter aloud. “Not worth thinking about.”

_______________________________________________________

You should have ordered pizza, good god why didn’t you just order pizza?! You had to go to three different grocery stores in order to get everything you needed for Bolognese, which took up an extra hour of your time. The tried and trusted recipe of your Nana’s inexplicably failing you after 9 years of flawless service, maybe she didn’t approve of your dinner guest. The pasta had clumped together in the water, leaving a stodgy mass, the sauce was weirdly acidic and salty having caught on the hob, and you’d slopped red wine down your white t-shirt when the cork shot out. At this rate the garlic bread would be the only thing edible.

Ding-dong.  The doorbell sounded more akin to a death knell.

You glance at yourself in the hallway mirror as you run for the door and groan, your hair frizzy from the cooking steam, face flushed, the large wine stain looking like you’d thrown up blood.

So why, when you open the door, is Eddie looking at you like you’re the best thing he’s ever seen?

“Hi.” He grins, leaning against the porch, he’s trying to affect a pose of nonchalance but you notice his left leg is bouncing slightly.

“Hi.” You say breathlessly, attempting to smooth down your hair. “Where’s your van?” You ask, peering past him to the empty driveway.

“Oh, I parked it up at Gareth’s, didn’t want your neighbours to give you a hard time, tell your dad or something.” He answers sheepishly.

“You didn’t have to, Mrs Roberts is blind as a bat.” You laugh, thumbing to the house on your right. “You wanna come in?” You ask, awkwardly jumping to one side, realizing you’re barring the doorway.

“Thanks.”

You watch him take in the lower part of the house from the hall, consciously slipping his battered Reeboks off onto the doormat, hanging his jacket up carefully on the coat hook.

“Nice place.” He says, smiling widely as he looks at a picture of you on the wall, taken when you were in kindergarten, bright yellow dress and bows in your pigtails to match. “Very cute.”

“Shut up.” You laugh, shoving him lightly, he catches your arm and brings you in for a bone breaking hug. You wrap your arms about him instinctively, his head pressing to the top of yours, rocking you slightly.

A lot of unsaid things pass through, it's a hug of comfort about what happened with your mom, it’s a hug of missing each other, it’s a hug that’s needed by both parties and you find yourself burrowing a little closer. He pulls back after a minute or so to look at you properly.

“You good?” He asks gently, thumbs rubbing across your cheeks.

“'M good.” You mumble, smiling softly. He leans down to kiss you when he stops just shy of your lips, to sniff the air.

“Do I smell burning?”

“SHIT!” You shout, pelting towards the kitchen, smoke billowing from the oven. You grab some mitts, and extract a heavily cremated loaf of garlic bread, coughing as you heave it into the sink.

“Aw honey, you baked.” Eddie croons, wrapping his arms about your waist from behind, you can feel his chest vibrating with barely held in chuckles.

“It’s a disaster.” You whine, leaning back into his embrace.

“What was it supposed to be?” He asks gingerly, lifting a saucepan lid to examine the spaghetti log.

“Spaghetti Bolognese.” You sigh.

“Well, points for effort princess.” He laughs openly, spinning you in his arms. “Do you have ramen noodles?”

You grab two packets of ramen from the pantry as Eddie pulls on an apron with a flourish tasting the sauce, wincing slightly. “You got any sugar?” He asks.

You dutifully pass him the sugar bag, watching as he eyeballs a small amount of sugar into the pan.

“My old man is a shitty person but he always knew how to make a mean pasta sauce.” He notices your curious expression, holding the spoon out to you, the sugar has managed to balance out the acidity and salt. 

“Salvageable.” You nod impressed.

Eddie dumps the dead spaghetti into the sink on top of the still smouldering bread, putting fresh water into the pan along with the ramen noodles as you pour the rest of the wine, handing him a glass.

“It’s supposed to have tasting notes of cherries, chocolate and cinnamon.” You read off the bottle label, sniffing yours.

“Tastes -” He takes a healthy gulp “-like wine, so - fucking gross.”

 You laugh, passing him the colander for the noodles, and grabbing some pasta bowls and cutlery.

It’s a sickeningly domesticated scene, the two of you sat at the breakfast bar, knee to knee, slurping away at the strange dish.

“Well sweetheart, we’ve managed to insult two great nations at the same time, cheers to Japan and Italy.” He grins lifting his glass of wine in a toast.

“Or we’ve created some kind of new fusion that will take the world by storm and we’ll be rich.” You counter argue.

“Oh yeah, this is some Michelin Man shit right here.” He says, taking another huge forkful.

“Michelin star.” You correct, laughing, feeling lighter than you have in hours.

You wash up the dishes together, Eddie constantly finding excuses to touch you, until you flick dishwater at him.

“Ah, now princess, play nice.” He warns, wiping his sudsy face with a smirk, pinching your side. You cup a large handful of bubbles, advancing on him menacingly.

“You wouldn’t.” He challenges, eyes narrowing.

“Try me Munson.” You dare.

“Truce?” He asks carefully, hands raised in peace.

You nod, letting him get close again before shoving your wet hand up his back.

“Oh you’ve done it now.” He laughs loudly, grabbing the dish cloth aiming a whip towards your ass.

“Eddie no!” You screech, rounding the breakfast bar, chucking an orange at his head.

“It’s war Y/n!” He yells, chasing you, you race out of the kitchen pounding up the stairs to your room, giggling wildly, you’re just in the door when he seizes you about the waist, lifting you off the floor.

“Ed’s put me down!” You gasp, laughing so hard it hurts your ribs.

He pretends to suplex you into the bed, but he’s gentle as he lowers you, protecting your head from the bounce hovering above you.

“Do you submit?” He asks breathlessly, hair mussed up, t-shirt slightly wet.

“Never.” You say defiantly, the effect somewhat lost as you trace your hands up his arms.

He presses his lips to yours, the last of your breath leaving you in a pleased gasp as he deepens the kiss, hands stroking idly up your slides and across your stomach.

“Missed you sweetheart.” He murmurs against your lips, your heart pounding like you’ve run up the stairs again. 

“Missed you too.” You mumble quietly, fingers scratching gently through his hair. “Wasn’t gone for that long though.” You remind him.

“Doesn’t matter, you weren’t close by, I didn’t like it.” He says, brown eyes staring intensely into yours, your mouth feels dry, filled with a jumble of words that don’t quite make it out. You settle for bringing him in for another kiss. Time seems to stand still, as you both lay there, absorbed in each other’s mouths, hands wandering, squeezing, stroking, until he suddenly stops a confused expression on his face.

“Ed’s?” You whisper, chest heaving.

“Who - do we have here?” He asks with a smirk, you feel your eyes widen in embarrassment as he extracts your childhood teddy bear from under your back, having forgotten to put him in the closet earlier. “This is a very respectable looking teddy bear princess, does he have a name?” He teases, making the bear wave.

You glare at him, making a snatch for it.

“His name is Bearington Bear the Third and he’s very old, so gimmie.” You pout, blushing.

“Bearington Bear the Third?” Eddie repeats with unbridled joy. “That is one hell of a name.” He laughs but relents in passing you the bear which you quickly kiss before unceremoniously throwing it across the room.

“That is no way to treat an elderly person.” Eddie gasps scandalized, you’re about to punch him when your phone rings making you jump, you roll away quickly grabbing the receiver.

  “Hello?”

“Hey kiddo, just thought I’d check in.” Your dad says, sounding very cheerful.

“Hey Dad, yeah everything’s all good here.” You say, trying to ignore Eddie who has decided to place kiss after kiss to the side of your neck. “Uh- how’s the fish?” You ask, elbowing him away but it just spurs him on, nipping at the soft skin.

“They’re biting pretty good, got a couple cooking up now. Gordon and Dale say hello.” You snag your lip on your teeth, as Eddie sucks on a particularly sensitive spot, attempting to lean away from his touch. “Sprout, you still there?” 

“Yeah I'm here dad, just uh - got distracted by the film.” You mumble shakily, a kiss pressed dangerously close to your mouth.

“That Travolta boy shaking his ass about again?” He asks with a laugh.

“Um - s-something like that.” You stammer, Eddie’s fingers splayed across your naval, threatening to move lower beneath the band of your leggings.

“Alright kiddo, I'll let you get back to it. Have a good night with Robin, love you.”

“Love you too Dad.” You slam the phone down as Eddie slips his fingers into your panties, lightly circling your clit.

“That was fucking mean Eddie.” You gasp, back arching into his chest. 

“Sorry baby, I just couldn’t help myself.” He groans, sinking a finger into your tight heat.

“Fuck.” You whimper, bringing an arm back to curl around his neck.

“This fucking pussy, jesus.” He growls next to your ear, nipping at your lobe, another finger pressing past the wetness gathered between your thighs.

He pulls you backwards so he’s resting against the headboard, your back pressed to his chest, legs cradling you as he pumps in and out, turning his head to kiss you, tongue fucking your mouth in the same rhythm. It’s maddening, his free hand cupping your breast, thumbing over the nipple, his hardness rutting against your spine.

“Ed’s.” You whine, hips rolling to meet his movements. 

“Let me get you there baby.” He huffs. “Wanna make you feel good.”

He slips from your cunt to rub rapidly at your swollen clit, the warmth moves slowly from your belly, washing across you in a gentle wave. You mewl into his mouth, Eddie swallowing every sound with his own.

He shifts out from under you, letting you fall back against the pillows, hands pulling at your leggings and panties, hooking your legs over his shoulders, tongue flicking straight at your sensitive bud. It’s like he’s making out with your pussy, wet, sinful, decadent. 

“Oh - god.” You stutter, hands gripping at hair.

“Feel good sweetheart?” He asks needlessly, fingers re-entering your cunt, crooking them to rub against the spongy spot that has you immediately cresting again, hips canting against his mouth.

“Eddie, fuck me please.” You beg.

“Your wish is my command.” He grins, stripping in record time, you pull your wine ruined top off, both of you bare and wanting. Eddie’s face falls suddenly.

“Shit! I forgot to bring condoms.” The poor boy looks devastated and you can’t help but giggle.

“Ed’s c’mere.” You beckon, he does as he’s told, crawling back between your plush thighs. “I’m on the pill, I have been for years.” You soothe, hands running over his back.

“You - you are?” He stammers, ears bright red and burning. “And you don’t mind me -” He trails off looking at you pointedly.  “ - I mean I'm clean, I've had the checks.”

“I’m clean too, and no I don’t mind.” You grin bashfully, he looks like a kid at Christmas.

“Oh holy shit this is hot.” He breathes, cock braced in his hand, sliding through your slick, you nod vigorously, the skin to skin feeling electrified.

He pushes in and you both gasp, you can feel every vein, bump and ridge as he drags along your walls. 

“Fuck baby, you’re so warm.” He moans, head dropping into your neck, kissing at your pulse point.

“Eddie.” Is all you can say like a record stuck on repeat, each thrust and snap intensified, the wet slapping of your bodies meeting in a delicious slide.

“Wanna ride you.” You murmur, sucking on his bottom lip.

“Jesus H Christ you’re gonna kill me.” He groans, rolling you both so you’re on top, you brace your hands on his chest, helping you to bounce, Eddie holds your hips so tightly you can feel bruises blooming and it sends you to dizzying heights.

“Baby, baby, baby.” He chants, grabbing the back of your hair, smashing your lips together, his hips pounding up into you. You rub at your clit, whimpering as the coil winds tighter and tighter.

“You gonna cum sweetheart?” He asks moving faster, and you can only nod, writhing on top as the band snaps.

“Oh god, I can feel you.” He whines, head pressed back as he ruts up harder. “Where - where can I cum princess?” He asks desperately, looking like he’s barely clinging onto sanity.

“Inside. Eddie, please cum inside me.” You cry, nails digging into his shoulders.

Eddie makes a choking noise, the veins in his neck strained tight, strong hands working your slick cunt over him continuously as he pumps into you. It sends you over for a fourth and final time, the warmth of him spilling out and around, both of you clinging to each other like life preservers.

“Sweetheart, I -” You wait for the rest of the sentence, heart pounding so hard you can hear it in your ears but he just gathers you impossibly tighter, pressing a hard burning kiss to your swollen lips. “ - I have a great time with you.” He breathes fiercely.

“I have a great time with you too, Eds.” You whisper, kissing him back.

Taglist:

@avalon-wolf @mystars123 @lolalanaie @eddiemunsonsgf2@eddieslildarling@bakugouswh0r3@sidthedollface2@81rain@blueberrylemontea-fanfic@winchester-angel@bimbobaggins69@tuskjohnny@fckyeahlames@thecomfortgoth@alanamarie@miarosso@ghosttownwherenoonegoes@somespicystuff@eddiethesexy @unfocused81 @1paire2vans @take-everything-you-can @mynameismothra @kingaa101

[sydsaint]

More fluffy holiday goodness!!

Summary: Carmelo asks the reader out on a date for the holidays which results in the reader inviting Melo to come fill out Angel Tree tags with her.

"Ouch!" You mock Cora from your position standing over her. "Better luck next time skater Barbie." You tease her with a wink. 

Cora holds the back of her head with a sour sneer on her face. She moves into a sitting position and watches you walk off with the NXT women's championship hung proudly over your shoulder. She lost fair and square against you. And on a Holiday show no less. 

You head through the curtain and find Carmelo waiting around for you with Trick. Trick flashes you a friendly smile before his entrance music hits and he has to head out to the ring. Carmelo on the other hand, stays behind and steps over to you. 

"Y/N, baby. Nice win out there, mean girl." He congratulates you on your win against Cora. 

"Thanks, Melo." You roll your eyes playfully at his nickname. "Got any plans for the holiday?" You ask him. 

Melo licks his lips with a cool and confident smile. "Well, that depends. What are you up to this weekend, baby?" He asks you. 

You laugh and shake your head at his forwardness. "Nothing that you'd be interested in. Trust me." You assure him. 

"Yeah? Don't be too sure about that." Carmelo replies. "Come on. Y/N. What are your plans?" He asks again. 

"Well, if you must know." You reply. "I'm planning on going around the area and filling out as many Angel tree tags as possible before I go broke." You explain. 

A perplexed look crosses Carmelo's face and you have to stifle a laugh. "Angel tree tags?" He looks for clarification. 

"Mhm." You nod. "There those trees with the tags on them in stores? If you're a struggling parent who can't spare the extra money to get your kids any gifts then you fill one out and someone like me takes the tag and buys stuff for you." You explain the gist of the tags. 

"Oh," Carmelo replies. "Damn, that's really nice of you, Y/N." He admits. "I didn't expect that from little Miss Mean Girl." He chuckles. 

You laugh with Carmelo and nod. "My mean girl attitude is just a work persona." You giggle. "I could use a shopping partner if you're interested, you know?" You offer. "Sure, it's not exactly a conventional date. But you get to spend time with me so all the money you spend will be worth it." 

"Why not?" Carmelo shrugs with a chuckle. "I don't mind dropping some cash for kids in need." 

"Great!" You grin. "It's a date then. I'll text you later and we can meet up for coffee in the morning." You add. 

Carmelo nods and you part ways for the night. 

Later, Trick comes back from his escapades in the ring and finds Carmelo texting you about tomorrow. "So you finally scored a date with, Y/N?" He asks Melo. 

"Sort of." Melo nods. "Have you ever heard of an Angel Tree?" He asks his friend. 

"Yeah, sure." Trick nods. "It's one of those charity things that help get poor kids and their families Christmas gifts." He explains. 

Carmelo nods and finishes his text to you. "Y/N's got me going with her fill a bunch of them out tomorrow. She was just telling me that she does it every year for Christmas."He explains. 

"Y/N? Charity?" Trick laughs. "Damn. I didn't know the mean girl got all sentimental around the holidays." He jokes. 

"Me either." Carmelo laughs with him. 

The next morning Carmelo is up early and meets you at some coffee place that you told him about last night. He heads inside and spots you already sitting at a table with a hot coffee in hand. 

"Y/N, morning baby." Carmelo walks over to your table. 

"Melo! You made it." You smile up at him. "Grab something to drink! We've got a long day of shopping ahead of us." 

Carmelo chuckles at your eager smile and orders himself a drink before joining you again. You show him a list of stores in the area that have trees and suggest one to start the morning. 

"Yeah, sounds like a plan." Carmelo goes along with your plan. 

You and Carmelo head to the first store on your list and it doesn't take long for you to find the tree. You look through a few of the tags a pick a couple of them out. 

"Alright, so basically you just look through the tags and pick one or two of them. The tag has some basic information on it. What kind of stuff the kid likes, their age, and what size clothes they wear if you want to get them some clothes." You explain. 

"Right." Carmelo nods and pulls a few tags off the tree. 

With your tags and carts ready to go you and Carmelo head out and start shopping. The two of you walk side-by-side down the aisles and help one another pick stuff out. 

You get distracted looking for a specific girl's toy in the aisle and Carmelo can't help but crack a genuine smile at how intense you seem. 

"Hey, Y/N," Carmelo speaks up and grabs your attention. 

"Hmm?" You stand back up straight with the right toy in hand. "What's up, Melo?"

Carmelo grabs the toy from you and sets it in his cart with the rest of his stuff before answering. "So, what made you get into this?" He can't help but ask. 

"Christmas was always my favorite time of year when I was a kid." You shrug. "My mom never really had the money to get me that much. But it was still special every year, opening presents and spending time with her." You explain. "So I guess I just like the thought of helping out those tired and worried moms make their kids' Christmas as special as mine were." 

"Damn. That's really sweet, Y/N." Carmelo replies. 

You blush a bit and the two of you return to the task. Hours and a few hundred dollars later, you and Carmelo have all of your things sorted and ready to be delivered. 

"Well, I'd call this a productive day." You finish up the last bag. 

"I agree. This is probably the best $400 I've ever spent." Carmelo agrees. "Thanks for bringing me out and letting me help, Y/N." He adds. 

You blush again and nod. "Of course! I had fun shopping around with you." 

"Me too." Carmelo agrees. "Hey, do you want to grab dinner after these are all dropped off? My treat, of course." He asks you. 

"Sure! Dinner sounds great." You eagerly nod. "Maybe we can talk about doing something for the actual holiday?" You suggest. "If you don't already have plans." 

Carmelo chuckles and shakes his head. "I'm wherever you are, baby." 

[youuuimeanmee]

RWTGI 36 - 37.2 Thoughts

Forgive the 3 chapters at once, lol. If you want to read my thoughts on the latest chapter, it's on down below!

Chapter 36

If you tell me 2 years ago that Yoshino would sleep in the corridor to wait for Kirishima, I would laugh in your face. I never thought this day would come when she's genuinely worried for him.

(Then again, he almost died trying to save her and they have been close lately, so that's fair)

WOW okay queen, slayy. Ugh those pillows look so soft-

That aside, I was shocked. I get that she was too tired to change, but really Asuka? Really? Blatant fanservice outta nowhere? Is she trying to grab the male demographic too? Not that it didn't grab the females already with that kind of bod-

WHY do we get Yoshino's full bod, yet we only get a glimpse of Shouma's abs? I demand equality.

Oh Yoshino. What are you, a dog? How could you differentiate Kiri's smell amongst all else??

Wow Kiri really uses his room as a front. He really didn't lie when he said he can't sleep near anyone's presence. He's like an animal hiding inside a deep cave. And to think his real bedroom is the same place where he often received his punishment.

In the raws, Yoshino actually says in a small note, "That's so typical of Kirishima (to keep things spotless)..."

I remember when Kiri always tidied up Yoshino's mess. I thought he only did it because it's for her, but to think he also keep his own place spotless... Does he have OCD? Then again, serial killers like keeping their place clean-

Question: If Kirishima is inside, how the hell did he lock his place using that kind of lock?

It's giving the vibe of a villain' secret lair.

Why is the room so cold though. I thought it's still October/November. Did he not install a heater there, or did he intentionally blast an AC to freeze some randos who try to break in?

My heart JUMPED when I saw him in the corner of the panel. That panel placement is a genius.

I was so relieved when I see him 🥺🥺 I'm glad he's not masochistic enough to keep his wounds infected. At least he got some treatment (hopefully from the hospital, but I'll take what I can get).

Wow, she really made sure she didn't see a dead body.

SCREAMING CREAMING CRYING.

Asuka really knows how to make a cliffhanger.

THANK YOU for the precious glossary, scans team! 💞😭

Chapter 37.1

Awright! Yoshino and Kirishima finally meet! This means Yoshino would call Shouma about Kirishima so he won't report this incident to Renji! Right?

Judging by his passwords, I thought I was getting better at reading him. Turns out he intentionally made it easier to guess? Wow, way to make a person feel like an idiot.

He really takes Tsubaki's advice to heart 🤣 Starting to regret the time when you burn those albums, don't you.

(Did he burn his all his photos because of sentimental reason, or because he didn't want his enemies to find his weakness?)

Okay, so he really went to the hospital. Good.

Kiri got to have some serious enemies if he only goes to a hospital he could trust.

It's been hammered down again and again that he has no one he completely trust except Yoshino. I hate this kind of set up. It's cliché, yet, it's still playing with my heart.

The way he tried to warm her nosee aughh

Those movements, and no resistance from Yoshino at all?? This is new. She must be really worried and thankful to even care about their positions.

Kirishima, you really said some crazy stuff sometimes.

What. The fuck. Do you mean. You're prepared. To be a missing person. And. To be. An unnamed corpse. Just. To keep. Yoshino. Safe.

I know I said he's unhinged, but he still managed to shock me. I'm impressed.

Istg he's really testing my heart lately. Wdym I'm gonna fall again for Miyama Kirishima. It's not gonna happen?? (It happens)

Still no phone call for Shouma. I hope it's on the next chapter.

Chapter 37.2

Woow, a lot of subtext in this episode. You really need to read between the lines to understand their convo.

Everybody trust Kirishima enough (due to his track records) to protect Yoshino so they're not worried for her safety at all; if anything, it'd be Soumei Renji who's in most trouble.

Basically, Renji from Kirigaya Group (Kansai region) has many enemies because he made a pact with Gaku from Tokusa Group (Kantou region) -- to form a peaceful(?) alliance; despite their clashing ideals. Renji also negotiated for his group to join Kantou region despite the difference in region. Both regions have been on feud for 60 years and it should be for a good reason, so there must be a lot of people within Kirigaya and Tokusa who weren't happy with this joint. (I have to revisit ch 1, 7, & 8 to understand this, sigh). Just a reminder, there was a similar attempt in the past, but it ended with a gang war.

Dang, so even Suo Azami's real identity is faked.

Azami is a drug and weapon dealer?? Fuck.

If we remember ch 26, Akame Hishibe from Tokusa and Azuma Narumi from Kirigaya are conspiring against Renji. Narumi probably aimed to be Kirigaya's number 1 after Renji died, but what about Hishibe? What's his aim? Kirishima said Azami is currently used by yakuza. Could it be, Hishibe made Azami kill Renji because he promised him he'd make a huge profit from drugs and weapons because there's gonna be a gang war once Renji is dead?

I strayed off, lol. Anyways, back to the chapter.

So, as long as Renji is unaware of Yoshino's kidnap, she and Kirishima could live together happily ever after. Now please call Shouma that Kirishima is back safely so he won't have to tell Renji, please.

Wow Kirishimaa. He is so stupidly honest, but sometimes he's such a crafty little shit. This is the same when he agreed to do paper-rock-scissors with Yoshino because he's aware he'd win. He made Yoshino think she has her own choice, when in fact it's all a set up by him. Real glad Yoshino busted his ass this time though, he can't get away with this forever.

Asuka be trying real hard with this whole show-don't-tell, huh. In short, Kirishima finally told Yoshino directly that he's been obsessed interested in her since 12 years old. He's so in love with her, to the point where her small quirk is so endearing to him. Without her, he would've been bored to death. He'd rather die without her, but he'd do his best to live if he's with her.

Sad, but Yoshino couldn't understand his devotion. She thought based on her understanding, love is something that'd wear out sooner or later. She couldn't really rely on Kirishima's feeling forever; and thus, she payed him with money as an insurance because money's value won't change while feelings might change; or at least that's her logic.

(After all the buildup, she still couldn't trust him completely. Is this bc she's traumatized with his drastic change in ch 2? 😭 Wow Kirishima, you fucked up big time)

Woow Yoshino, way to gaslight him what he feel is not love 😂 when your understanding of 'love' is probably just a crush 🤣

Does she realize if they managed to catch Suo Azami, they're essentially preventing a gang war? Probably not.

Heh. She covered her nose because it's cold. Cute.

Wdym she placed herself in that side of the bed. She won't be able to escape easily in that position. Kirishima could just lean to her side with his uninjured hand. Is she not sus Kirishima would do something to her? And why she sleep with him in the first place when she could just go back to her room? She really trust him now, huh.

The tearrss. Is that a tear of relieve, happiness? Or is that a tear of tiredness, lol.

Aww, Kiri. He used to say he can't sleep with anyone's presence including Yoshino, but look at him now 🥹

I am glad you guys made a stronger team than ever, but

CAN SOMEONE CONTACT SHOUMA SO HE WON'T TELL ON RENJI PLEASE??

Damn this turned out much longer than I expected, lmao. But that's because these chapters have been bombs. Can't wait for the next one! XD

[tj-dragonblade]

FLUFFBRUARY 2023: Feb 18, 19, 20, 21, & 22

Feb 18 prompts: recovery flight film Feb 19 prompts: mosaic dragon nursery Feb 20 prompts: favorite reveal lounge Feb 21 prompts: marathon young journal Feb 22 prompts: bridge throw dawn

Another multi-day amalgamation. 'Recovery' was the theme that got me started; 'dragon' 'young' and 'throw' popped in as words used and 'reveal' is a theme that threads through the whole thing as well. It's more hurt/comfort than fluff until the last bit, I'm afraid, but uh. It is what it is. Spoilers - this centers on a relationship from later in comics canon but comics knowledge isn't really necessary.

On AO3 - 2900-ish words

~~~***~~~

When Dream first tells Hob he's got a girlfriend ('courting', was actually what he called it, which sounded so much more refined), Hob is surprised. Happy for him, sure, but very surprised.

And maybe a little bit…something else. Can't quite put a name to it, but he'd been getting rather worried at his friend's long absence, not having seen him for several months. Should be a relief to know all's well, that he's just been entertaining a lady-friend in the Dreaming all this time, right?

"Her name is Thessaly," Dream says when asked, his face soft and smiley, and Hob stuffs down the little voice that says Hope she's worth the worry you caused me.

"I'm happy for you," he says instead, and he is. Truly. "Tell me about her?"

~~~***~~~ "I have been neglecting our friendship, alongside my duty," Dream admits, the next time they talk, and Hob is enormously mollified to hear his own sentiments echoed.

"I don't blame you, my friend," is what he says, though. "Young love can be very distracting. Things still going well?"

"Yes," Dream says, and Hob listens politely as he elaborates, steadfastly pushing down his jealousy.

Because yes, he can admit now that that's what it is.

Finding out that his erstwhile stranger is not above romantic entanglements, that the option exists, has forced a thorough examination of his own feelings, things he'd always just steered around and refused to confront. And what he's discovered is that yes, they are indeed what he'd suspected them to be, and they're a little bruised now on top of that. Six hundred years he's known Dream, but he doesn't merit the offer of permanent residence in the Dreaming?

Not that he'd want it, mind; he loves living life. Here. He wouldn't want to give that up even if it meant being with Dream all the time, but it would be flattering to be given the option.

"She has no care for my station," Dream is saying. "It is. Refreshing, to not be regarded with awe and deference."

"Imagine it must be," Hob agrees, but inside he's nursing the nameless wound that's just opened. He has always seen Dream as more or less an equal, has always treated him as 'my friend' above all else, even after being trusted with the truth of who Dream is. Why is it unnoticed and unremarked upon in him, if it's so notable in Thessaly?

But. Dream is happy. That's truly the most important thing.

It is.

~~~***~~~ "I fear Thessaly is growing unhappy," Dream says, some weeks later, and Hob squashes the piece of him that perks up at that, because what kind of friend would he be to take joy in the possibility of relationship troubles?

"What's been going on?"

"In the begininng, I gave her. All, of my time, and attention. But my duty cannot be left neglected in the long term. There are others in my life with whom I would share my time, as well." His eyes flick up to meet Hob's for a second as he says this last, and Hob has to just breathe past the warmth lodged suddenly and sharply in his chest.

"In tending to my duty, in seeking balance, I have given her. Cause, to find fault," Dream continues, and a red flag goes up in Hob's brain.

But no. He'll put that away, for now, and not leap to conclusions just because they might benefit him.

"Talk to her," he advises instead. "Maybe she just needs the reassurance that your feelings haven't changed, even though the time you spend with her has. Honest communication can solve a lot of problems."

~~~***~~~ It's another unusually long stretch before Hob sees Dream again.

"My friend!" he greets, old habit, when Dream finally puts in an appearance at the Inn. "You look…a bit of a wreck, honestly. Are you well?"

Granted, Dream frequently seems just this side of 'mopey and depressed', and today is no different, but. There's something more in his bearing, no matter how put-together his physical presentation���something exhausted, worn down, haggard, and it alarms Hob, just a bit.

"I am. Well enough," is what Dream says, and Hob doesn't quite believe him but also knows better than to expect any sort of direct explanation. He answers Dream's questions, carries on a little while about all the things he's been up to the past couple months, before gently beginning to prod.

"And how's Thessaly?"

Whatever ease Dream had attained during their conversation vanishes instantly; his mouth hardens, his eyes redden, and Hob's heart sinks.

"She. Decided she no longer loves me," Dream says.

And Hob sees red.

He knows, rationally, that there's two sides to the story, that okay yes Dream can be a bit of an arsehole sometimes, and it's not fair to pin the failure of a relationship solely on a single party.

But Hob, he's always been a bit protective of his friends. Of this friend in particular, especially after…everything. He wants to see Dream happy. He's almost possessive, in that regard, hoarding Dream's presence and Dream's smiles and Dream's conversations over their table like a dragon with its treasure; Dream is his treasure. And to see his treasure—his friend—his treasured friend, to see him hurt this way, it makes Hob livid with fury.

He collars it, stuffs it down, turns his thoughts to sympathy instead. "I'm so sorry," he offers.

"It was not your doing." Dream sounds like he's talking about bad weather, no matter that he looks like he's ready to sink into the ground and disappear for a century or two.

"Course not, but I'm still sorry you're going through it. Heartbreak, s'rubbish."

"It will pass. It is. Passing."

"D'you wanna…talk about it? Go upstairs, have a drink, tell me everything?"

"What purpose would be served, by reliving it thus." He sounds so defeated, and Hob's heart aches.

"Closure?" he offers, gently. "Getting it out, sharing the load, leaving it behind 'stead of carrying it festering inside? Talking through your troubles is all the rage, this century. Therapy, they call it."

Dream says nothing, looks extremely unconvinced.

"I know, not exactly your style, is it." Hob gives him a rueful, sympathetic smile. "But the offer stands, if you decide you want to. I'm here for you; my door's always open."

Dream sits with him in silence awhile longer, and leaves without offering anything further.

~~~***~~~ It's three days later that Dream returns, appearing in Hob's flat late on a Friday night. "It is not. Passing," he says, like he's dragging every word kicking and screaming up from the depths within him. "I would. Try—" He stops.

Hob sets aside his marking, motions for Dream to come join him on the sofa. "Talk to me," he says, very gently.

And Dream does.

Haltingly, with long stretches of silence interspersed, the words sometimes as painful to speak as if they were being torn from him physically.

And Hob listens.

He learns a great deal about Dream's latest relationship and entire romantic history.

His opinion of Thessaly does not improve.

~~~***~~~ Dream comes back again on Monday morning, looking very much on the verge of a breakdown.

Hob cancels his classes, makes tea, sits down with Dream.

"Am I incorrect, to center my function as I do?" He sounds weary, stricken.

"No, dove, you're not," Hob says gently, the endearment slipping out almost without his notice; he lets it slide, unremarked. "There's more to you than your duty, certainly, but of course it's going to be what most of your time is devoted to."

Dream's eyes are glossy and red-rimmed and he looks utterly lost; Hob reaches across the space between them to settle his hand on Dream's knee, offering a kind touch. "Anyone who doesn't understand that you can't give one hundred percent of your time to them forever doesn't understand you. And you deserve to be understood."

I understand you, he can't help thinking; it goes unsaid, because none of this is about him.

Dream is looking at him now with his watery eyes; a tear slips free and he turns away, silent and stoic. Hob watches another tear slide down his face.

"There's no shame in crying," he says, softly, coaxing. "Sometimes you just have to let it all out."

Dream looks back to him, lip beginning to tremble, and then a sob escapes him, and Hob's heart aches.

"Oh, love, come here," he says, opening his arms. It's all instinct; had he stopped to think on it, he probably would have talked himself out of offering this degree of physical contact when the occasional hand or shoulder touch is their norm. The reality of Dream suffering here in front of him bypasses that kind of rational caution completely, though, and when Dream moves a second later to collapse into his embrace, openly weeping, Hob can't regret it.

"I've got you," he murmurs, gently folding Dream against his chest, "It's alright," and "Let it out," rocking him lightly and stroking his back while Dream cries himself out.

It's entirely possible there may have been a helpless kiss pressed to Dream's thistledown hair at some point, but a good friend would not have and Hob is choosing not to think about it.

~~~***~~~ "I do not know, anymore, whether I truly loved her," Dream says the next time they meet. "Perhaps it was. Infatuation, and simple lust."

"…I don't think she was right for you," Hob ventures, carefully. It's mild, but it's the first real criticism he's offered about Thessaly, adamant as he's been to avoid anything that feels like acting on his own interests. But Dream has told him enough to paint a picture of his ex-lover and it's not the picture of someone Hob would want his friend tangled up with.

"And what do you know, of what is right for me," Dream returns, but it's…it's far more considering than condescending, and Hob ventures onward.

"You need someone who understands you," he proposes, "and I don't think she did. From what you've told me, she was not impressed by you at first, already had this pre-conceived notion of who you are, what you should be like, and for all that you dated awhile I don't think she ever really let go of that." Dream is still just looking at him, contemplatively, so he forges ahead. "So once the honeymoon was over, once she wasn't getting spoiled by your constant attention and the newness of your love—the mundane, the everyday, they came creeping back in, and she decided her first impressions were right after all."

Silence settles over them for a few moments, Dream's tea cooling half-drunk in his cup.

Hob touches Dream's hand, gently, and their eyes meet again. "I'm sorry she hurt you," he offers, fiercely sincere. "I'm so sorry that all your past loves have ended in heartache."

Dream manages a wan smile. "I will recover," he says, standing to leave, and Hob watches him go, stepping soundlessly between realms in the blink of an eye.

"I could never hurt you that way," he dares to say to his empty kitchen after Dream has disappeared. "I could be what you need."

He resolutely pushes his bittersweet resignation aside to get ready for bed.

~~~***~~~ "I wish to be. Loved," Dream says, with such sadness in his eyes, and Hob aches.

I could love you, he thinks, desperately. I do love you, I would love you the way you want so badly, the way you deserve—

"You'll find someone," is what he says, softly, with conviction, daring to place a consoling hand on his friend's shoulder. "You will."

"Perhaps," Dream allows, which is more optimism than he's expressed since this whole thing began, and Hob counts that as progress.

~~~***~~~ "You are a good friend, Hob Gadling," Dream declares, a month or so down the road, and Hob's heart swells within him because that is all he has tried to be and to hear it acknowledged makes everything else worth it. "You have given me much to consider, and. Helped me, to settle the turmoil within."

"I'm glad you're doing better," is what Hob says in reply, and it's nothing but the truth.

Dream smiles, reserved and sincere and all for Hob, who is as ever a devoted dragon, and gathers this precious gift into his hoard, kept near his heart with every other such treasure.

"Thessaly was wrong about many things. She was. Wrong, about me as well." Dream sounds confident, certain, and Hob is so so glad to hear the healing in his words. "I am capable of balance. And I am capable of. Love."

"Course you are," Hob agrees, brimming with love himself, but still. Even if he was bold enough to act on it, even if he could be certain that Dream's exclusively-female history didn't preclude his own chances for consideration, now is not the time. He doesn't want to be Dream's rebound. "And the next time you fall in love, they are going to appreciate you for the wonderful person you are. They'll thrive on your initial fire and they'll remain steadfast once it settles. Else they'll have to answer to me." He flashes his cheeky grin, and Dream graces him with another smile, gaze warm and considering all the while.

~~~***~~~ "How goes the search for love?" Hob asks, after several more of their weekly meetings. They're upstairs in his flat, after the Inn has closed for the evening.

"I have not been. Searching," Dream replies, which doesn't actually surprise Hob. Thessaly, after all, was by Dream's own admission the first such dalliance in a very long time.

"Giving up on romance for awhile? Or just letting the wind blow as it will?"

Either way, he's got time to sort out what, if anything, he means to do with his own feelings. If he's pleased not to have to sit by while Dream lavishes his affections on someone else again, well. That's for him to know and keep.

Dream offers a small, secretive smile. "Perhaps." He meets Hob's gaze, holds it, and slowly, the smile eases into something else, solemn and serious. "Or. Perhaps, what I seek, has been before me all the while."

Hob forgets how to breathe, just for a second. "O-oh?"

Dream goes still a moment, focusing inward, and then he's somehow reaching between the realms and producing an enormous, elaborate bouquet in a magnificent crystal vase, which he sets heavily on the coffee table beside them. It's very clearly defying several natural laws, gravity included, and it's absolutely stunning—a frothy shimmering iridescent masterpiece of roses and other blooms that largely don't exist in reality; Hob knows he's gawking but can't really help it.

"From the dreams, of a master florist in Germany," Dream elaborates, as if that explains why he's done it, and then he waits.

"…For me?" Hob asks, when it becomes apparent that a response is expected, and Dream slips into another smile, soft and warm.

"For you," Dream confirms. "A small token, of my affection." He reaches across the empty space between them on the sofa, takes Hob's hand in both of his, and suddenly the dream-bouquet is just. Not that distracting anymore. "You have been. Invaluable to me, during my recent tribulations, and I have. Realized, that. Beyond even this…I care for you, deeply, and—" He's struggling with the words but his gaze is steady, direct and sincere and oh, Hob's poor immortal heart cannot take this. "I wish to court you, Hob Gadling. If you are amenable."

"Yes," he says, barely more than a whisper; then, stronger, "Yes. I am." He's about two seconds from throwing himself into Dream's arms and kissing the daylights out of him; he clasps his free hand over Dream's holding his other to quell the urge. "Please. Court me to your heart's content. I am absolutely amenable."

Dream's face is alight, his smile soft and beautiful, and he's leaning in carefully. "Then, if I may—"

But Hob has reached his limit. Abruptly he is wrenching his hands from Dream's and seizing that beautiful pale angular face and launching himself forward, pushing Dream backward against the arm of the sofa and finding his mouth along the way.

And then Dream's arms are around him, Dream's mouth open and eager underneath his, and he's thought about kissing him so many times but the reality is far, far better.

"I love you," he gasps, when he finally draws back, and Dream looks so beautifully stricken by the words he would say them again and again and again til the end of everything, just to see the wonder blossoming in his face. "Court me all you like, as long as you like, but know this: I'm yours, always, have been for ages, and I love you—"

Dream surges up, kisses him fiercely, and Hob. He.

He doesn't know quite what to do with all the happiness singing inside him, but for now, it is more than enough just to kiss and be kissed, to let himself bask in the joy of feelings revealed and feelings returned, to sink into the satisfaction of finally being right where he most wants to be.