#and it's about the banter and roasting (affectionate)

[corvessa]

A Pesto Masterclass, A Little Bit Of Roasting, And A Whole Lot Of Love

a/n: okay i know i've said in the first post that its model/actor theo, but i just know this man would be a mad cook, also i will try and make something more related to his career i promise you, for now you'll have to live with a cute cooking stream <3

Summary: During a surprise kitchen stream, the reader hands over control to their charming, perfectionist boyfriend Theo, who confidently cooks authentic Pesto alla Genovese while playfully roasting the reader’s past cooking fails. Between Theo’s precise culinary skills and their easy, affectionate banter, the stream turns into a cozy, heartwarming moment full of teasing, casual kisses, and chat’s emotional meltdown over their genuine, effortless love.

The camera flickered on.

Instead of your usual studio backdrop, chat was greeted with the warm lighting of your shared kitchen — a sleek, marble island centered in frame, black cabinets bathed in golden morning light, and a suspicious absence of LED lights or chaotic desktop clutter.

- HELLO?? - kitchen stream??? - she’s never willingly entered that zone before

You appeared from off-screen, already grinning. “Alrighty, chat! We’re mixing it up today. No studio, no monitors, no code—don’t panic. It’s a cooking stream. Well—technically not my cooking stream.”

You stepped fully into frame and gestured dramatically. “It is, in fact, a stream starring my beautiful, talented, extremely Italian boyfriend, Theo.”

- freaks out in all caps - KING THEO IS IN THE BUILDING - finally the content we DESERVE

You clasped your hands together, smug. “Now, why not me, you ask? Great question. I’ve been banned from the kitchen ever since I managed to cut my finger while slicing a mango. A mango, chat. It wasn’t even moving.”

From behind the camera, a low voice chimed in. “She cut herself before the knife touched the fruit.”

You ignored him. “So today, I’m moral support. And also tech support. Because Theo, despite his many talents, doesn’t know how to operate a stream.”

- imagine being banned from your own kitchen - we’re all here for theo anyway let’s be honest - i love her but she’s a menace

And then he appeared: Theodore, hair messy, sleeves rolled, eyes already scanning the countertop like a Michelin-star chef about to reclaim his rightful throne.

“Ciao,” he said smoothly, nodding once at the camera with an infuriatingly perfect smirk. “Today we’re making Pesto alla Genovese. Properly. No weird substitutions. No food processors. No... pink glitter salt.”

Your eyes narrowed. “I knew you were gonna bring that up.”

“We share a kitchen, darling,” Theo replied, starting to unpack his ingredients. “I’m haunted daily.”

- HAUNTED 💀💀💀 - i want to be bullied by him so bad - he said glitter salt like it personally offended him

Theo held up a small container and gave the camera a deadpan look. “She also owns heart-shaped measuring spoons. And a whisk that sparkles.”

You gasped. “And you love it here.”

He didn’t argue. Just turned back to toast the pine nuts like a man trying to preserve his dignity.

Soon, he had everything set up in a neat row: fresh basil, garlic cloves, pine nuts, grated parmesan, olive oil. You peeked over his shoulder, arms crossed.

“You know you’re intimidating chat right now, right?”

“Good,” he murmured. “Someone needs to hold them accountable for using garlic powder in pasta.”

- he’s coming for everyone - that wasn’t even directed at me and i feel attacked - i’ve never peeled garlic in my life

Theo worked like he’d done this in another life — measured, precise, talking through each step in that warm, quiet voice that somehow made basil emulsification sound romantic. But you weren’t really listening.

You were too busy sneaking pine nuts.

“Stop eating the ingredients,” he said without turning.

“You didn’t measure them.”

“I eyeballed them.”

“You say that, but then judge me when I do it.”

“Because you eyeball salt like you’re trying to kill someone.”

Eventually, the pasta was cooked and plated: a perfect swirl, topped with vibrant pesto, a bit of parmesan, and a basil leaf, as if he were serving royalty.

He slid one bowl in front of you with a little flourish. “Your Highness.”

You took one bite — and immediately groaned. “Oh my god. I hate you.”

He raised an eyebrow. “That good?”

“It’s criminal. I can never eat jarred pesto again.”

“I told you. You’ve been committing basil-related war crimes for years.”

- BASIL WAR CRIMES - i can’t believe this is a real couple - this is marriage coded i don’t care

You narrowed your eyes. “Don’t act like you didn’t fall for me while I was still microwaving pasta in a mug.”

“That wasn’t a courtship,” he said. “That was an intervention.”

As you both ate, the chat slowed — heart emotes taking over, chaos turning into cozy. Theo sat beside you now, elbow resting on the counter, watching you chew with a small smile. Like he didn’t need to say anything.

And then, mid-bite, he reached over to swipe his thumb across your cheek.

You blinked. “Did you just—on stream?”

“There was pesto on your face,” he said simply.

- screams in lowercase - they’re so casual about it i’m LOSING MY MIND - someone hold me

And just when things couldn’t get any worse for chat’s emotional stability, Theo leaned over and pressed a kiss to your cheek. Casual. Like he’d done it a thousand times before. And he did, just not on stram.

You didn’t move. Chat absolutely exploded.

He just picked up his fork again. “Do they always scream this much?”

You shrugged. “You kissed me on camera. You did this to yourself.”

“I’m beginning to understand.”

By the time both bowls were empty and the contented silence set in, you leaned back in your seat with a sigh. “Okay, fine. You win. This was perfect.”

“I always win,” Theo replied, and the worst part was — he didn’t even sound smug. Just matter-of-fact. Like gravity.

You smirked toward the camera. “Alright, chat. I’m gonna end stream before Theo gets recruited by some Food Network exec in the comments.”

Theo reached over and flicked one of your sparkly measuring spoons. “Let it be known, I disapprove of glitter in food.”

- you don’t get a say you kissed her - he’s literally glitter-proof. i love him.

You clicked a few things on your stream deck and waved at the camera. “Thanks for hanging out with us today, nerds. Back to your regularly scheduled tech gremlin chaos next stream.”

“And no more glitter salt,” Theo added, just as the screen faded to black.

[alive-gh0st]

❝Corruption Complete❞

Mark Grayson x Brainrot Girlfriend!Readerᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ

𓊆ྀིfeat. Oliver & Debbie Grayson𓊇ྀི

˗ˏˋ 𓉘 Part 2 — ”Too Far Gone” 𓉝 ˎˊ˗

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

🦖 summary: mark’s trying to enjoy a quiet night at home. too bad his girlfriend has just discovered a new hyperfixation—and now oliver’s in on it. debbie joins next. mark’s officially outnumbered.

‪‪🦖 contains: sfw. modern brainrot. fandom jokes. long-suffering boyfriend!Mark. brainrot!reader. tiktok trends. group roasting. oliver is a smug little shit. debbie is thriving. mark just wants peace. comedic fluff, banter, affectionate roasting, domestic vibes. silly chaos.

‪‪🦖 wc: 722

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌a/n: i wrote this instead of doing literally anything productive. it started as a joke and now it’s got lore. enjoy my descent. also, yes—i know, the title is 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂.

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

It started innocently enough.

You were sprawled on the couch, eyes glued to your phone, tears streaming down your face as you watched an AI-generated TikTok video.

“Mark—Mark, look!” You shoved your phone in his face. It almost smacked him in the nose, but it’s fine. He’s literally [Title Card].

Moving on.

He squinted at the screen. “Is that… a cat in a firefighter uniform?”

“Yes! It’s so tragic and inspiring. The kitten was rescued from a fire, grew up to become a firefighter, and then died heroically saving a child. And—listen to this—it reunited with its grandma in the afterlife.”

Mark raised an eyebrow. “You cried over an AI-generated cat video?”

“It’s not just a video, Mark. It’s art.”

➽─────────❥

The descent into chaos was swift.

A few days later, Oliver burst into the living room (nearly crashing into a wall), eyes wide with excitement.

“Have you seen the ‘Ballerina Cappuccina’ trend?!” he blurted, practically vibrating.

You gasped, sitting up. “Yes! The one with the cappuccino-headed ballerina pirouetting into the void?”

Oliver nodded vigorously. “It’s peak brainrot.”

Mark groaned from the kitchen. “Not you too, Oliver.”

“It’s a cultural movement, Mark.” Oliver said, deadpan.

Not even ten minutes later, real chaos began…..Debbie’s curiosity was piqued.

She entered the kitchen, holding her phone while pursing her lips.

“Kids, what’s this ‘Bombardino Crocodilo’ thing?”

You and Oliver made eye contact, then—without speaking—played the audio simultaneously: “FORZA BOMBA!”

Debbie blinked. Then looked at Mark—who didn’t even look up, just slumped lower against the cabinets like the universe was personally attacking him.

“Well, that’s… something.”

➽─────────❥

A quiet evening turned into a bonding session.

With Mark and Oliver out training because let’s be real—that boy needs some serious teaching, you and Debbie settled on the couch. She sipped her wine, a mischievous glint in her eye like she’s about to drop a bomb.

“You know,” Debbie says casually, “Nolan once gave me a whole tree instead of flowers.”

You blink, taking your eyes off the TV. “Like… an actual tree?”

“He said, and I quote, ‘Why bring a branch when I can bring the whole organism?’”

“I kept it,” she says. “Still in the backyard. Useless man, but decent taste in flora.”

You clutch your heart. “That’s the bar. If Mark doesn’t deliver a redwood to my house within 72 hours, we’re over.”

As if summoned Mark walks back into the house with snacks and an expression of pure betrayal. “I brought you chips.”

“Does the chip bag photosynthesize?” you ask sweetly.

➽─────────❥

The ‘Pass the Phone’ challenge ensued.

Feeling strangely inspired (which should’ve been a red flag), you declared: “Let’s do the ‘Pass the Phone’ challenge!”

Everyone agreed way too quickly.

You started the recording. “I’m passing the phone to someone who still doesn’t understand TikTok.”

Mark raised a brow, sighed like a man defeated, and took the phone. “I’m passing the phone to someone who’s been on TikTok for five minutes and already has a fan club.”

He passed it to Oliver.

The purple boy—who was just happy to be here—beamed straight up at the phone screen. “I’m passing the phone to someone who once received a tree as a romantic gesture!”

He hands it to Debbie, who only laughs.

“Guilty as charged.”

➽─────────❥

╒════════════════𝜗𝜚

ACTUAL QUOTES FROM THE EVENING:

➥ „I swear to god if you post that TikTok—”

➥ „Too late. It’s already at 40k views. You’re famous now, tragedy boy.”

➥ „You said you wouldn’t bring up Amber! And—why are people simping over my MUM!”

➥ „Because she’s a baddie, Mark.”

ꪆৎ════════════════╛

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

•∘˙○˚.⋆ ˚｡⋆ ୨🐊୧⋆ ˚｡⋆ ∘˙○˚.•

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

Mark stood in the doorway, arms crossed, watching his mom and little brother conspire with you over delusional fan theories and imaginary men.

“…I want in,” he said.

Everyone froze.

You blinked. “Wait, what?”

“I’m tired of fighting it. I need to understand the brainrot. Teach me your ways.”

Oliver threw his arms in the air. “HE’S CONVERTING.”

Debbie raised her wineglass. “To the dark side.”

You grinned, scooting over and patting the space beside you. “Welcome to hell, babe. First lesson—rank these fictional men based on how they would treat you.”

Mark sighed. “I already regret this.”

“You will,” you promised. “Now take this blanket. We’re about to watch a seven-part edit of Tim Cheese killing John Pork.”

“…and no, you can’t ask questions.”

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌ With Love, @alive-gh0st

[wvyik]

s’more than you can handle. d.w. ✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚

dean winchester x fem! reader

ᰔ summary: dean takes you on a ‘proper date’ which apparently involves fire, sugar, and him trying to one-up you in marshmallow roasting.

⤿ warnings: fluff, banter, marshmallow chaos, sticky kisses, fire safety violations, dean being competitive over s’mores, reader nearly burning the forest down (affectionate), pre-established relationship, idiots in love.

⤿ notes: this is just soft chaos and sweet nothings by the fire. dean’s a menace. you love him anyway. thank you for reading, I hope this made you smile!

You’re halfway convinced this is just an excuse for Dean to play with fire and eat chocolate, but you’re not mad about it.

The Impala’s parked near this little clearing he found off a back road, far enough from town that it’s quiet except for the crickets and the occasional owl that hoots like it’s judging you. He’s got a fire going like it’s second nature, and you’re sitting on a worn blanket, legs stretched out in front of you, hoodie zipped halfway up, and Dean’s flannel draped over your shoulders because “you always steal it anyway, might as well make it official.”

He’s crouched in front of the fire now, focused like he’s defusing a bomb, turning a marshmallow slowly over the flames. His tongue is poking out a little in concentration and it’s so unnecessarily cute, you’re kind of obsessed.

“You’re taking this very seriously,” you note, eyebrows raised.

Dean doesn’t even look at you. “Sweetheart, if we’re doin’ this, we’re doin’ it right. No charred marshmallow nonsense. I have standards.”

You lean back on your hands, grinning. “Okay, Gordon Ramsay. Impress me.”

“Oh, I will.”

A minute later, he’s stacking the marshmallow between graham crackers with a square of chocolate that’s already melting in the fire’s heat. He finishes and holds it out to you like it’s a priceless gift. “For you, m’lady.”

You snort, “I feel so honored.” as you take a dramatic bite, your eyes widen. “Oh my gosh. This is amazing.”

Dean puffs his chest like a smug golden retriever. “Told ya. Ten outta ten.”

“Okay, my turn,” you say, already grabbing your stick. “Let’s see if I can live up to your high-class marshmallow standards.”

You try to mimic what he did, but yours catches on fire almost immediately, burning like a tiny marshmallow torch.

“Whoa—oh my God—” You start flailing the stick around like you can put it out by waving. Dean’s already laughing, grabbing the stick from your hand and blowing on it dramatically until the flames die.

“You were supposed to toast it, not summon Satan,” he teases, dropping the blackened marshmallow into the grass.

“I panicked!” you cry, laughing so hard your stomach hurts. “It escalated fast!”

Dean’s grinning at you, full dimples, all bright eyes and boyish charm. He brushes his fingers through your hair quickly, like he just can’t help touching you. “You’re dangerous with a sugar stick, babe.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “You still love me.”

He smirks. “That’s true. But I’m making your s’mores from now on. For safety reasons.”

You roll your eyes, but let him build another one for you anyway. This time, you feed it to him, smearing chocolate on his lip on purpose just so you can lean in and kiss it off, giggling against his mouth.

He licks his lips afterwards, and like he’s in heaven— flops back onto the blanket. “You’re killin’ me, woman.”

You crawl over and lay beside him, resting your head on his chest while he steals another marshmallow straight from the bag and pops it into his mouth. He offers you one too; no stick, no roasting, just plain and pillowy, and you take it with a happy little hum.

The stars are crazy bright, the fire’s still crackling, and Dean’s arm curls around you like he was made to fit there.

And sure, your fingers are sticky, your hoodie smells like smoke, and there’s chocolate on your jeans, but it’s still the best night ever.

taglist; @lieutenantchaos @bejeweledinterludes @ambiguous-avery @mostlymarvelgirl @freeluigihesbae @brutuuallove @impala67rollingthroughtown @multiversefanfics @littlesoulshine @starzify @ladykitana90 @idontwannabehere78 @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing @pieandflannel @twelveyearsofit @tinas111 @unstable-cucumber @everythingisaspectrum @pennywatsonlafayette @lunaleah ⊹ ࣪ ˖

⤿ wanna be tagged in my fics?.. don't be shy! @ taglist.

tysm for reading! more works incoming @ library. ⊹₊⟡

[jungwnies]

sfw alphabet | lando norris

୨ৎ : synopsis : sfw a-z alphabet for lando norris ୨ৎ : word count : 993

୨ৎ : requested : @catherine4631610

(a/n) : don't forget to like & reblog !! my requests are open!

a ⤖ affection (how affectionate is he? how often does he show affection?)

probably quite affectionate, but in a playful, teasing way.

lots of nudges, silly faces, and casual touches rather than constant grand gestures.

b ⤖ beginning (what would he be like as a bsf; how would the friendship start?)

friendship would likely start with some shared interest - gaming, maybe?

he seems like someone who values genuine connection and shared humor. you'd probably roast each other constantly.

c ⤖ cuddles (does he like to cuddle; how would he cuddle?)

enjoys cuddling but might get a bit restless.

he'd probably prefer being the little spoon surprisingly, or a tangled mess of limbs.

d ⤖ domestic (does he want to settle down; how good is he at cooking and cleaning?)

seems like he'd be open to settling down eventually, but not in a rush.

cooking and cleaning? he'd try his best, but might need some "encouragement" (aka, you taking the lead).

e ⤖ ending (if he had to break up with you; how would he do it?)

he'd try to be honest and kind, but might struggle with direct communication.

there's a chance he'd overthink it and make things a bit awkward.

f ⤖ fiance (how does he feel about commitment; would he want to get married quick?)

commitment might take time, but once he's in, he's all in.

he wouldn't rush into marriage, but wouldn't shy away from it either when the time is right.

g ⤖ gentle (how gentle is he; emotionally + physically?)

generally gentle, both physically and emotionally.

he seems to have a good heart and wouldn't intentionally hurt someone he cares about.

h ⤖ hugs (does he likes hugs; how often does he hug you; what are his hugs like?)

hugs are probably a regular occurrence.

playful squeezes, side hugs, and maybe the occasional bear hug when he's feeling extra affectionate.

i ⤖ i love you (how fast does he say he loves you?)

he might take a while to say it, wanting to be sure of his feelings first.

but once he does, he'd mean it wholeheartedly.

j ⤖ jealousy (how jealous does he get; what does he do when he is jealous?)

probably not overly jealous, but might get a bit competitive if he feels threatened.

he'd likely express jealousy through playful teasing rather than anger.

k ⤖ kisses (what are his kisses like; where does he like to kiss you; where does he like to be kissed?)

kisses would be a mix of sweet and playful.

forehead kisses, quick pecks, and longer, more passionate kisses when the moment is right.

he might have a thing for kissing your nose.

l ⤖ little ones (how is he around children?)

seems like he'd be great with kids, patient and playful. (i mean we've all seen him with penelope and how much she loves seeing him)

he'd probably make silly faces and get involved in imaginative games.

m ⤖ morning (how are mornings spent with him?)

mornings would be relaxed and playful.

lots of sleepy cuddles and maybe some friendly banter before getting the day started.

n ⤖ night (how are nights spend with him?)

evenings would be a mix of chilling out and having fun.

gaming sessions, movie nights, or just chatting and laughing together.

n ⤖ open (when would he open up; does he say everything at once or does he wait to reveal himself?)

he might take a while to fully open up, but once he trusts you, he'd be honest and vulnerable.

he'd likely reveal himself gradually over time.

p ⤖ patience (how easily angered is he?)

seems fairly patient, but can be competitive and might get frustrated during intense moments.

he'd likely try to manage his anger constructively.

q ⤖ quizzes (how much would he remember about you; does he remember every little detail; or is he forgetful?)

he'd probably remember the important things about you, but might miss some of the smaller details.

he'd make an effort to pay attention, though.

r ⤖ remember (what is his favorite moment in the relationship?)

his favorite memory would likely be a shared adventure or a moment of genuine connection and laughter.

something unique to your relationship, like an inside joke or something.

s ⤖ security (how protective is he; how does he protect you; how would he like to be protected?)

protective in a subtle way, making sure you feel safe and comfortable.

he'd appreciate someone who can be both independent and supportive.

t ⤖ try (how much effort does he put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

he'd put effort into the things that matter to you, but might not always be the most traditional romantic.

expect thoughtful gestures and quality time over grand displays.

y ⤖ ugly (what are some of his bad habits?)

might be a bit messy and prone to leaving things lying around.

he could also get overly competitive at times.

v ⤖ vanity (how concerned is he with his looks?)

he probably cares about his appearance to some extent, as most people in the public eye do.

but it wouldn't be his defining trait.

w ⤖ whole (would he feel incomplete without you?)

he'd definitely value your relationship and see you as an important part of his life.

but he also seems like someone who values his independence.

x ⤖ xtra (random headcanon for him)

he probably has a secret stash of silly socks and loves to wear them when no one's looking.

y ⤖ yuck (what are some things he wouldn't like; in general or in a partner?)

dishonesty and negativity would be major turn-offs.

he'd also likely dislike drama and people who take themselves too seriously.

he always needs a good laugh so he would hate someone who didn't match his energy tbh.

z ⤖ zzz (what are his sleeping habits?)

he's probably a restless sleeper, tossing and turning throughout the night.

might even talk in his sleep occasionally!

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[yes-no-maybe-soo]

I'll never get people who shit on MC for being "too mean" to Sylus.

She's not being "too mean". She is lovingly roasting him. Which is an important distinction. She loves Sylus, and would never say something that would for real hurt his feelings. Not intentionally.

And Sylus clearly loves her sassiness. Loves that she talks back. Loves that she gives as good as she gets.

The "gives as good as she gets" part is a detail that the "MC is too mean" crowd seem to overlook. Sylus isn't some fragile flower who just stands there silently holding back tears whilst MC is gagging him. Fellas, this is Sylus we're talking about. Mofo is sassy as hell, and just as smart mouthed as MC is, heck, arguably even more so. Some of his text messages alone are proof of this.

In other words, he bullies MC right back.

He basically outright says as much in the arcade "I won't bully you... here" but I will when we get home, is the obvious implication. B/c that's what they do. They enjoy indulging in more or less childish banter and witty back and forths. Affectionately taking the piss out of each other is canonically one of their love languages

Besides, I think that Sylus likes it when MC is "mean" (ie talking back) to him. Not only is it a novelty to him — being as feared and powerful as he is — that someone would actually do that to him, but I believe he clearly enjoys it when MC smart mouths and humbles him, finding it amusing and hot. In a text message of his he even says that he wishes MC were bossier with him. He definitely doesn't want her to kiss his ass or constantly fall over herself for him, which is what certain players seem to expect and want from her.

Anyway, what I'm really trying to say is that I think it's funny that some are so quick to pile on MC when she is gagging Sylus, yet don't react at all when Sylus does the same to her 🤷‍♀️

Personally, I love this aspect of their relationship. They're both funny af. So many lines from Magnum Opus in particular has me wheezing. Their banter is honestly everything and I hope to see even more of it in future cards 😌

[houseofstarlight]

matchup for @lost-lonnie

MATCHED WITH SUGAWARA KOUSHI (^▽^)

if you would like a matchup for yourself, please read the guidelines here!

why i chose this character

“my personality has been known as a chaotic, exhilarating, fun mess, but i’m not always like that. my social battery runs out super fast”

— ➴ i headcanon suga as an ambivert, which sounds like your personality type as well, so he’ll match your personality

— ➴ we’ve all seen from the show that he has a good amount of energy, and since he teaches young kids post-timeskip, you know he needs to keep up with those little demonspawns

— ➴ however, i think suga is a very chill person; he’ll nearly always prefer staying in to going out, and he’s generally a pretty quiet guy when you guys are spending time together

— ➴ so all of this is to say that suga would be able to match your energy; he wouldn’t be too hyper, but he also wouldn’t be a total recluse

“i’m the type of friend who teases and makes fun of you! like, editing funny photos of you, never letting you forget something humiliating, and doing things to annoy you”

— ➴ may i introduce you to sugawara koushi, second biggest troll on the karasuno team, bested only by the one and only tanaka ryuunosuke?

— ➴ i think he genuinely finds it fun to tease and roast his friends; of course he’s very conscious about boundaries though

— ➴ but yeah he’s very similar to you in that sense, which is good cause you guys can understand each other in that way

“things i look for in a partner are someone humorous, patient with me, physically affectionate, good banter and taller than me lol”

— ➴ suga’s pretty funny ngl, what a troll he is

— ➴ with suga’s sense of humor and troll-ness will come teasing banter

— ➴ he’s definitely patient because he’s a kindergarten teacher post-timeskip, and like i said above—demonspawns.

— ➴ also suga is like 5’8 or something; not too tall but taller than you

headcanons

— ➴ i could actually see suga liking romance novels

— ➴ or like

— ➴ ya ☠️

— ➴ i think he doesn’t read a lot simply because when he comes home from work he usually doesn’t have the energy to

— ➴ but on the weekends especially, he likes to curl up with you in bed and read a few chapters; you guys could have your own little book club or something

— ➴ baking dates!! i don’t even know if it’s canon that suga likes to bake, but i always associate him with baking christmas cookies with mariah carey playing in the background

— ➴ also imagine dancing with him to christmas music while you’re waiting for the cookies to bake? soooo romantic

— ➴ suga is the mom friend for a reason; he takes great care of everyone around him and it would only be amplified tenfold with his significant other

— ➴ for example, if you take any medications, suga has them all memorized and always remembers to remind you about taking your medicine on time

— ➴ you guys are highkey the menace couple who just goes around trolling all your friends lmao

— ➴ they tremble to see you coming

— ➴ suga also loves naps! actually, it’s not so much naps as just sleeping. i’d imagine running after four year olds all day gets really exhausting, so when he comes home all he really wants to do is flop onto the couch and fall asleep right there

— ➴ suga is a fan of cuddling while you sleep; specifically, he’ll pull you into his arms so your head is on his chest and your legs tangle together (it’s super romantic cause you can listen to his heartbeat!)

— ➴ if you ever fall asleep randomly on the couch or something, i don’t think suga would be the type to carry you to the bed, since he’s afraid he’ll drop you or wake you up

— ➴ instead he’ll bring you all the soft blankets and tuck you in nice and warm to make sure you don’t get sick! it’s a lot like how he treats his students during nap time lol

other characters

— ➴ tanaka ryuunosuke

— ➴ oikawa tooru

a/n: hello! thank you so much for your request, and i hope you enjoyed your matchup 🫶

[diekleinesuesse]

Being best friends with Lee Know:

Being best friends with Lee Know would be a rollercoaster of chaos, laughter, and unexpected soft moments. He’s known for his savage humor, sharp wit, and teasing nature, but underneath it all, he’s incredibly caring and protective of the people he loves. If you were best friends with him, you’d get to experience all sides of him the mischievous prankster, the responsible hyung, the affectionate cat dad, and the secretly softhearted friend who always has your back.

The Endless Banter

Lee Know doesn’t hold back when it comes to teasing the people he’s close to, so you’d have to develop a thick skin pretty quickly. He’d constantly poke fun at you, whether it’s about how you laugh, the way you eat, or even your fashion choices. But don’t be fooled he does it out of love. If you ever tried to tease him back, he’d act completely unbothered, but you’d definitely see that little smirk that means he’s enjoying it.

However, the moment someone else tries to mess with you? Suddenly, he’s the most protective best friend in the world. He can roast you all day, but if someone else tries to? They better be ready to face his death glare.

The Playful Pranks & Savage Humor

Lee Know loves messing with people, so as his best friend, you’d probably become his favorite target. Expect harmless pranks hiding your phone, changing your alarm to something ridiculous, or sneaking cat pictures into your camera roll without you noticing.

But the ultimate sign that you’re his best friend? If he starts play-fighting with you. He’d randomly push you, lightly flick your forehead, or even pretend to trip you when walking past. It’s his way of showing affection. And don’t even get me started on his humor if you mess up in any way, he will not let you live it down.

The Soft Side No One Sees

Despite his savage exterior, Lee Know is actually one of the most caring people ever, especially when it comes to the people he loves. He just has a hard time expressing it directly. Instead of saying, “Are you okay?” he’d do things like bringing you your favorite drink without being asked, making sure you’ve eaten, or randomly sending you funny memes to cheer you up.

If you were having a bad day, he wouldn’t be the type to sit down and have a deep heart-to-heart, but he’d find little ways to comfort you maybe by dragging you out for a walk, forcing you to eat something good, or just sitting with you in silence until you felt better.

Cat Dad Mode Activated

Being best friends with Lee Know means accepting that his three cats (Children) Soonie, Doongie, and Dori come first. He’d introduce you to them immediately, but don’t be surprised if he gets jealous when they like you more than him.

If you’re lucky, he might let you babysit them, but he’ll give you very specific instructions on how to take care of them. And if you ever disrespect cats in any way? Expect to be dramatically scolded.

The Food Adventures

Lee Know loves food, and as his best friend, you’d be his official eating partner. He’d always drag you to new restaurants, make you try different snacks, and probably judge you for your food choices (even though he’d secretly eat them too).

But if you ever say you’re not hungry when he offers you food? He’d stare you down until you take at least one bite. Sharing food is his love language, even if he pretends to complain about it.

Concerts & Dance Sessions

Since he’s an insanely talented dancer, you’d get free dance lessons whether you wanted them or not. He’d randomly play music and force you to try choreography, laughing when you mess up but also helping you improve. And if you actually learned one of Stray Kids’ choreographies? He’d act unimpressed but would secretly be really proud.

Going to concerts with him would be an experience. He’d act all cool at first, but the moment a song he loves comes on, he’d lose his mind and start hyping it up like crazy. If he caught you just standing still, he’d grab your arm and make you jump with him.

The Ultimate Protective Best Friend

Lee Know might act like he doesn’t care, but deep down, he’s super protective. If you’re walking home late at night, expect him to text you to make sure you got home safely. If he notices someone treating you badly, he won’t hesitate to call them out.

And if you ever got hurt, whether physically or emotionally, he’d drop the teasing act and actually take care of you. If you cried in front of him, he wouldn’t know what to say at first, but he’d awkwardly pat your head or sit next to you in silence until you felt better.

Random Acts of Friendship

If he saw something in a store that reminded him of you, he’d buy it and just casually hand it to you later, acting like it wasn’t a big deal.

He’d send you the most random texts at odd hours, like “Did you know octopuses have three hearts?” with no explanation.

If you ever fell asleep next to him while watching a movie, he’d pretend to be annoyed but would make sure you had a blanket.

He’d never admit it, but he’d secretly be really happy when you supported Stray Kids and showed up to their events.

Late-Night Deep Talks (Only on Rare Occasions)

Lee Know isn’t the type to have deep conversations often, but if he ever did, it would be late at night when you’re both exhausted and too tired to filter your thoughts. That’s when he’d casually drop things like, “I’m glad we’re friends” or “You know I’d be really sad if you weren’t around.”

But the next morning? He’d act like it never happened. If you brought it up, he’d just say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

A Life long Friendship

Being best friends with Lee Know would mean a lifetime of teasing, laughter, and unexpected soft moments. He’d act all tough, but deep down, he’d cherish you more than he’d ever admit. He’d be the kind of best friend who insults you one second and then makes sure you got home safely the next.

It wouldn’t always be easy he can be stubborn, sarcastic, and hard to read sometimes but at the end of the day, he’d always be there. And if you ever needed a reminder of how much he cares? Just watch the way he silently looks out for you, even when he pretends not to. And that’s what makes being best friends with Lee Know so special.

[junnieverse]

UNTIL WE'RE 80 ➳ P. SUNGHOON

➙ synopsis: your friend was constantly swooning over her new boyfriend and you realise the honeymoon phase wasn't really in yours and sunghoon's relationship. it was nothing but constant teasing and playfulness but you both knew you would never change anything about it for the world.

pairing: park sunghoon x gn!reader

genre: fluff, crack, friends to lovers au

word count: 0.7k

request: [ inspired by this tiktok ] " you and hoon are with your friend who just got into a new relationship and is all like omg he’s so handsome, i love him so much. you and hoon just look at her all weird and say things like “i’d never think of him that way, look at him” cause u guys were friends before dating so it’s just ur dynamic and just being overall playful together but there are still times where you also talk about each other that way. "

warnings: not proofread, alot of teasing and name calling from reader and sunghoon

a/n: here it is anon! I didn't want to make it too long but I think this turned out so cute and pretty funny so thank you for this request angel, enjoy :)

"Oh geez dude, just the sight of you almost burnt my eyes." you tell Sunghoon who entered the room as you covered your eyes.

"Wow, I'm that handsome. My beauty blinded you." he says proudly smiling.

"More like your ugliness. Man what happened to your face." you playfully remark laughing as your friend holds in her laugh.

Ignoring your response, your boyfriend sits down next to you.

"Seriously, he is the cutest guy ever, I can't believe I get to call him my boyfriend." your friend continues to tell you about her new boyfriend.

"He should run for it while he can. I wish I did." sunghoon says side eyeing you. 

"He's amazing honestly. Last time he came over, he got me a bunch of flowers with my favourite snacks and chocolate." she says sighing dreamily.

"I wish I had a boyfriend to do that for me." you playfully respond sneaking a glance at your boyfriend who pinched your thigh as you had your legs over his lap.

Your friend looked between you and Sunghoon before pouting.

"Oh c'mon, you and Sunghoon have the best relationship ever, you're both pretty much the reason I didn't like being single half of the time." she admits to which Sunghoon chuckles.

"Please, Sunghoon? He's not all that, I could do better. I mean look at him lmao."

"If anything I should get a new partner. This one is all smelly and they like clinging to me." he teases you pretending to gag.

Flinging a pillow at him, he successfully dodges it and sticks his tongue out at you.

If anyone else saw the both of you they would think you and Sunghoon were just best friends who enjoyed bantering and teasing each other but you had both actually been dating for years now.

You'd been childhood friends and that soon turned into something romantic.

Having known each other for so long, your relationship dynamic didn't change much, you still enjoyed bickering and being playful, only difference was you did the couple stuff too now, like... dates and being overly affectionate.

"Oh shut up Hoon, I'm doing you a favour by dating you, nobody wanted you. You literally look like a weird frog." you tell him as you made a look of disgust.

Your friend looked between the two of you as you bickered but despite how you were going on roasting each other, your connection was undeniable.

You could make fun of your boyfriend all you wanted but at the end of the day he still brought butterflies to your stomach with his smile alone.

"Frog? Bro you're built like the hunchback of Notre-Dame. Please look at yourself. I'm gorgeous." he retorts winking at you as he complimented himself.

"Look at you, you're a total simp, giving me those heart eyes-" you tease Sunghoon as you laughed at him and your friend joined along.

"Am not! I'm looking at you because you have a fat booger sticking out your nose loser." he defends himself before he attacks you.

Hovering over you, Sunghoon starts tickling you and he was quick to find your weak spots to make you laugh even harder.

"Stop hahaha, I-I can't take it Sunghoon." you try your best to say losing your breath.

He momentarily stops pretending to think, "Hmm... I'll stop on one condition. You give me a kiss."

"What? No way, your breath stinks like butt crack." you tease him before he starts his ruthless attack again.

"O-okay okay fine! I'm sorry, I'll do it!" you surrender and he stops.

Leaning down, you give your boyfriend a quick peck on his lips and your friend clears her throat indicating she was still there.

"Oh you both are completely whipped. I have an entire boyfriend and you still manage to make me feel single once again." she says shaking her head.

"Bros before hoes. How about I dump him and then we can have a girls night!" you suggest giving her a high five as Sunghoon scoffs.

"You know I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." he sits up ruffling your hair messing it up as you slap his hand away.

"Maybe we do have to get rid of our boyfriend's then it'll just be us. No more boys being gross around us!" your friend joins in the playfulness as Sunghoon glares at her.

"Oh you can't get rid of me, I'll be annoying you until we're 80." sunghoon says with an arm around your shoulder before kissing your cheek.

Rolling your eyes at this, you knew you wouldn't have it any other way.

[brunettemarionette]

@njutul

𝗗𝗲𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

𝐈 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐉𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐞!

Juice is the ultimate ride-or-die partner, and his personality aligns so beautifully with yours. He’s goofy, affectionate, and fun, but he also has a sensitive and deeply loyal heart. He thrives on excitement and spontaneity, so he would 100% be down for all your wild ideas. He’s the type of guy who’d jump into the ocean fully clothed with you just because it looked fun. He’d match your chaotic energy and dramatic moments with his own, making life one big adventure.

𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗼𝗻𝘀

Juice is constantly touching you—whether it’s hand-holding, forehead kisses, or pulling you onto his lap. He NEEDS to feel close to you.

You two make random road trips, reckless dares, and last-minute plans a lifestyle. If you say, “Let’s go to the beach at 2 AM,” Juice is already grabbing his keys.

One day, on a whim, you both get small, matching marine-themed tattoos. He gets a tiny wave behind his ear; you get a tiny compass on your wrist.

Juice isn’t the toughest guy in the club, but he’d 100% step up if someone disrespected you. He may not win every fight, but he’d throw punches for you without hesitation.

He hypes you up 24/7, whether that’s cheering when you walk into a room or leaving you little sticky notes with cute doodles that say, "Ur my favorite human."

𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱

Chibs Telford — He’d be the big brother figure making sure Juice treats you right, while also teasing you both relentlessly about how grossly in love you are.

𝗥𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗧𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗲𝘀

Chaotic Sunshine x Chaotic Soft Boi – You’re both energetic, dramatic, and impulsive, but in a way that makes life an adventure.

Best Friends to Lovers – You start off bantering, pulling pranks, and hanging out all the time until one day, Juice realizes he’s absolutely in love with you.

Public Teasing, Private Vulnerability – You roast each other mercilessly, but in private, you both drop your walls and share your fears and dreams.

𝗣𝗹𝗼𝘁 𝗧𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗲

Drunken Love Confession Gone Right – Juice drunkenly confesses his love for you at a party, thinking you won’t remember. You totally remember.

𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗲𝘁

You were at a SONs party, and your friends dared you to run up to the cutest guy and say something dramatic. You spotted Juice, waltzed over, and dramatically declared, "You, sir, have the face of a man who’s about to change my life." Juice spit out his drink laughing, and you two ended up talking all night.

𝗗𝗲𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

𝐈 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐫!

Thor is the embodiment of FUN, adventure, and larger-than-life love. He’s affectionate, spontaneous, and down to do the wildest things on a whim. He would absolutely match your energy, making every day exciting. Plus, he’s naturally protective and strong, giving you that stability and sense of safety while still being incredibly playful. He’d hype you up endlessly, showering you with compliments, and he’s a huge hugger—so your love language would be fulfilled 24/7.

𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗼𝗻𝘀

Thor LOVES picking you up—whether it’s spinning you around in excitement or throwing you over his shoulder just because.

You’ll never feel safer than when Thor is around. If anyone even looks at you wrong, he’s glaring down at them like an avenging god.

You both have big personality energy, meaning spontaneous, ridiculous, joy-filled adventures all the time.

Whether it’s at a royal Asgardian feast or in your kitchen at midnight, Thor will grab your hand and dance with you just because he loves seeing you smile.

He’d shower you in praise, adoration, and gifts, treating you like you personally make the sun rise every day.

𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱

Loki — He'd pretend to be annoyed by you, but secretly love your chaotic energy. You’d relentlessly tease him, and he’d always be lowkey impressed by your wit.

𝗥𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗽 𝗧𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗲𝘀

Golden Retriever x Sunshine – Thor is the biggest himbo sweetheart, and your bubbly, dramatic energy makes you an unstoppable duo.

Loud Love – This man would yell across a battlefield just to tell you he loves you. He is not subtle about his affection.

Grand Romantic Gestures – This is a man who would literally bring you the moon if you asked. He writes the BIGGEST love stories with his actions.

𝗣𝗹𝗼𝘁 𝗧𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗲

Accidental Marriage – You and Thor get accidentally married in Asgard, and everyone is too excited about it for you to back out.

𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗲𝘁

While you were diving, a sudden riptide pulled you under, and before you could react, a massive, strong arm grabbed you and lifted you back to the surface. You blinked up at Thor, half-wet, shirtless, and looking very heroic, and he smirked, "Fear not, fair one. The sea shall not claim you while I stand." You just coughed and replied, "Dude. Dramatic much?"

[aethercore-seeker]

NYMERIA'S RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS WITH LIs

Nymeria is a menace (affectionate). A gremlin through and through, she thrives on teasing, being chaotic, and making her friends question why they still put up with her. She's sharp, quick-witted, and always one step away from disaster. When it comes to the men in her life, her dynamic shifts depending on who she’s with.

Note: I know there are more LI blogs I interact with but I haven't reached that point with them yet. When I do, they'll be tagged into this too. Also, I will do one for the OCs and NPCs I interact with. I will also do it for the MCs I interact with her gal pals too!.

CALEB ( @apple-caleb , @farspaceapple )

With Caleb, she’s needy. She’s selfish in the way only someone deeply loved can be. He’s pampered her for as long as she can remember, and she knows she’ll always get her way—unless it’s a matter of her safety. That’s where he draws the line. She pouts, she whines, she tugs on his sleeve and gives him those big eyes, and nine times out of ten, it works.

But she’s not just taking—she loves him, really. She doesn’t abuse it, doesn’t push too far, because she knows what he does for her. She just… likes being someone’s priority. And Caleb? He lets her be.

XAVIER ( @deepspacexavier )

Nymeria is used to being the problem, but Xavier? He’s a whole other kind of problem. He switches up so fast, and it throws her off. One second, he’s teasing her, the next, he’s soft and warm, and suddenly, she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

Around him, she’s still playful, still her chaotic little gremlin self, but there’s a hesitation there. A shyness. She’s learning to open up here, learning to trust that the switch-ups aren’t traps. That the softness isn’t temporary. That it’s okay to be soft back.

ZAYNE ( @cryocardiologist )

With Zayne, she takes care of him just as much as he takes care of her. She knows he’s the responsible one, the one who overworks himself to the bone, and she’s not about to let that slide. But she also loves messing with him. His no-nonsense attitude is hilarious to her. She pokes at him, teases him, just to see him roll his eyes but see the corners of his mouth quirk up almost imperceptibly.

With Zayne, she’s a mirror—he takes care of her, so she takes care of him. She’s a little softer here, a little more nurturing, because someone has to be. But that doesn’t mean she won’t poke at him just to get a reaction.

SYLUS ( @souldesired , @qin-conqueror )

Sylus makes her feel safe, and that’s the problem. Safety is dangerous in its own way. The more she relaxes around him, the more complicated things get. She’s vulnerable here, but she doesn’t want to be seen as fragile, so she tries to act tough. It’s pointless, though. He sees right through her, and he’s so damn tender about it that it makes her want to scream.

She hesitates, holds back, but deep down, she wants to lean into it. Wants to stop fighting the comfort he offers. But that would mean letting go of the fear of depending on someone and she’s not sure she knows how.

RAFAYEL ( @artistrafayel )

Nymeria tries to match Raf’s bratty energy, but she never really succeeds. He’s just too good at it, and half the time, she ends up laughing instead of actually roasting him.One second, they’re bantering, and the next, he’s looking at her like she’s something precious, and she short-circuits.

But beyond that, she loves him for all that he is—the sides he shows the world, and the sides that only she gets to see. With Raf, she lets her inner child come out, because there’s no judgment, no pressure, just the freedom to be as ridiculous as she wants.

[balinsbestie]

The stubborn rock and the wildflower (part 2)

Flirting: A Banquet for Kili’s Birthday 

The grand hall of Erebor was alive with music and laughter, the long table groaning under the weight of roasted meats, honey cakes, and an array of fine ales. You stood near the head of the table, watching Kili banter with Fili and Thorin, his face alight with joy. 

“You’ve outdone yourself, lass,” Bofur said, sidling up to you with a grin. “Kili’s got a grin as wide as the Gates of Erebor.” 

“Thank you,” you replied, beaming. “He’s my best friend—it had to be special.” 

From across the room, your eyes caught Dwalin’s, his gruff expression softening as he took in your smile. 

“Well, look at that,” Balin said, appearing at your side with a knowing twinkle in his eye. “Our Dwalin’s been starin’ at you all evening. Think he’s forgotten his ale.” 

“I hadn’t noticed,” you said, feigning innocence, though your cheeks warmed. 

“Didn’t you?” Balin chuckled. “Maybe it’s time you gave him a reason to come over.” 

Taking Balin’s advice to heart, you grabbed a plate of food and made your way to Dwalin. He raised an eyebrow as you set it in front of him. 

“Thought you might be hungry,” you said, leaning slightly closer than necessary. 

“I can fetch my own food, lass,” he grumbled, though the corner of his mouth twitched upward. 

“Consider it my way of saying thanks,” you teased. 

“Thanks for what?” 

“For not scowling at Kili’s singing—yet.” 

His deep chuckle sent warmth through you. “Don’t push your luck.” 

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” You turned to leave, but he caught your wrist, his rough hand surprisingly gentle. 

“Stay,” he said quietly. “Food tastes better with company.” 

Flirting: Sparring in the Training Yard 

Sweat dripped down your temple as you squared off against Dwalin, his imposing figure casting a long shadow across the yard. You tightened your grip on your sword, determined not to let him overwhelm you—again. 

“Ready to give up, lass?” he asked, his voice a rumble of amusement. 

“Not a chance,” you shot back, lunging forward. 

Dwalin parried easily, his movements smooth despite his bulk. “You’re quick,” he admitted. “But you’ve got to be smarter than your opponent.” 

“Oh, I’m plenty smart,” you replied, circling him. “For instance, I know you’re distracted.” 

“Am I?” His brow furrowed, though his stance didn’t waver. 

“By me,” you said, flashing a grin as you feinted left before darting right. 

The move almost worked—you managed to graze his side before his axe blocked your follow-up strike. His grin widened. “You’re cheeky, I’ll give you that.” 

You locked blades, your faces inches apart. “Cheeky works, doesn’t it?” 

Dwalin’s eyes flicked to your lips for a fraction of a second, and your heart skipped. “Maybe,” he murmured. 

His next move sent your sword clattering to the ground, but the triumphant look on his face made losing worth it. 

Courting: A Midnight Rescue 

Moonlight filtered through the dense forest as you stumbled over a root, cursing under your breath. The orcs you’d been tracking had vanished, and you were hopelessly lost. 

A low growl made your blood run cold, and you spun around to see a wolf stalking toward you, its teeth bared. Before you could react, a familiar axe buried itself in the beast’s side. 

“Dwalin!” you gasped as he stepped into view, his expression a mixture of relief and irritation. 

“Didn’t I tell you not to go off alone?” he barked, pulling you to your feet. 

“I had it under control,” you lied, brushing dirt off your tunic. 

“Sure you did,” he muttered, his hands lingering on your arms a moment longer than necessary. “Come on. We’re headin’ back.” 

As you walked, you couldn’t resist teasing him. “What, no lecture about how reckless I am?” 

His glare softened into something almost affectionate. “You’ll get your lecture later. For now, I’m just glad you’re all right.” 

Engaged: The Hidden Waterfall 

The hidden waterfall was a place Dwalin had discovered years ago, a serene spot tucked away in the mountains. When he brought you there, the sound of rushing water and the sight of sunlight filtering through the trees took your breath away. 

“It’s beautiful,” you said, turning to him with a smile. 

“Figured you’d like it,” he replied, his voice uncharacteristically soft. 

You sat together on a rock, the silence between you comfortable. After a while, you noticed him fiddling with something in his pocket. 

“What are you hiding, Dwalin?” you asked, leaning closer. 

“Nothing,” he said gruffly, though his ears turned red. 

You raised an eyebrow. “Liar.” 

With a resigned sigh, he pulled out a small wooden box and handed it to you. Inside was a simple silver ring, its band engraved with dwarvish runes. 

“I thought…” He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck. “I thought you might like it.” 

Your heart swelled as you slipped the ring onto your finger. “I love it.” 

Relief flickered across his face, and he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “Good. It’s about time you had somethin’ to show for puttin’ up with me.” 

Married: A Winter Trek 

The blizzard had come out of nowhere, turning the mountain trail into a white blur. You and Dwalin trudged side by side, your cloaks pulled tight against the biting wind. 

“We should’ve waited,” he muttered, his voice nearly lost in the storm. 

“And miss this adventure?” you teased, though your teeth were chattering. 

He shot you a look. “You call this an adventure?” 

“Everything with you is an adventure,” you said, your smile softening the sarcasm. 

Dwalin shook his head, but his expression warmed. “You’re mad, lass. You know that?” 

“Mad enough to marry you,” you replied, bumping his shoulder. 

He grunted, a sound that might have been a laugh, and pulled you closer. “Stick close. Don’t want to lose you out here.” 

The storm raged on, but with his solid presence beside you, you knew you’d make it through. 

Married with Children: Teaching Duraina to Fish 

The sun glinted off the lake as Dwalin cast his line, his expression one of deep concentration. Beside him, your daughter Duraina mimicked his movements, her tongue sticking out in determination. 

“You’ve got to be patient, lass,” Dwalin said, his voice gentle. 

“I am patient!” she insisted, though her line had barely hit the water before she reeled it back in. 

You chuckled from your spot on the shore. “She gets that from you, you know.” 

Dwalin shot you a look. “And here I thought she got her stubbornness from you.” 

Duraina huffed. “I’m not stubborn—I’m determined.” 

Dwalin’s laugh was deep and genuine, and he ruffled her hair. “Aye, that you are.” 

Watching them together, you felt a deep sense of contentment. Life with Dwalin was never dull, and you wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. 

[welcometoteyvat]

waterborne poetry reactions (belated) (long post)

XINGQIU GOT FUCKING SMASHED IN THIS EVENT. BULLYING XINGQIU HOURS I LOVE TO SEE IT (affectionate)

bro got roasted for his handwriting, is Baffled by the mondstadters, then spends an entire day missing out on [whatever that was] and STILL DOESNT HAVE A CLUE WHAT HAPPENED HAHAHA im sorry i love bullying him

please never tell xingqiu whats going on it's payback <3

CHONGYUN DIONA AND MIKA. i need to hold them omg,,,, i was using freminet to wander around so in my heart they r just 4 cryo kids in a terrarium what will they do!! that combo was quite cute

CHONGYUN YANG MODE?!?!?!?!?! ON SCREEN??????? WAAAAHHHHHHHHH

he was adorable ;;;;;___;;;;; his little eye sparkles and the jumping T_T also the near-rap speed that his lines were delivered in was hilarious (thank you kinsen for ur service)

my son.... please never feed him chilis again

CHONGYUN IMPACT. that's all

now full of unfounded hope that chongyun will someday get an event about his pure yang spirit since they mentioned it a fair few times here

give him the deep lore he deserves

also XIAOYUN?!?!?!?! (only seeing what i want to see) THEY TALKED!!!! IN PERSON ON SCREEN THEY TALKED AND XIAO WASNT DISPARAGING!!!! im sorry this is what a rarepair with no food does to a mf

xiaolumi so strong (or xiaother if u prefer)

oughguhguhg the rhyming couplets part was SOOOO CUTE!! idk they did good with the pacing of the banter i think 🥺

adding onto that the camera angles and cuts this event were actually really nice and creative i think. they made it more engaging (the quick pan from chongyun to xingqiu at the end of the 3rd act, hu tao popping out from behind venti's shoulders during the couplet exchange, etc) it was REALLY good really funny. added to the experience a lot <3

Also venti zhongli are truly the most archon old friends ever

that cutscene was actually so pretty. It's drawn in the same style as Lyney's: very textured lines, slightly reminscent of linocuts, quite a few handdrawn parts, especially where there's water/liquid movement present, etc. Maybe this is a Fontaine style animated cutscene, since the oceanids and lyney are both from there? anyways. i'm intrigued—I wanna see if there are regional cutscene styles or something (that'd be very impressive)

the "close ur eyes paimon/diona" line was so fucking funny. traveler's been the third wheel a bunch of times but never this explicitly

also ! for people icked out by the morality of kid finch's crush on the oceanid: it is Fiction with a capital F

on the one hand I agree with the above sentiment, but it's also just funny to think about. first canon monsterfucker ? /JJJJJJJJJJJJJ don't kill me for that joke

Real thoughts: I think it was actually really sweet how he fell in love with a fairytale. Someone said the oceanid could've been aromantic coded to make their love story more morally palatable; I agree, it would've been cool if she was aro, but I don't think their romantic relationship is like somehow terrible and gross either

overall ending was really mid tbh, I appreciate the character growth of everyone who was on screen but literally all the other characters just disappeared. It was really unsatisfying lol especially for an event that was supposed to be hte gathering/unison of mond and liyue

would've been better if the second day's rhyming couplets ended the event I think; you'd have to tweak it to fit the mood of the oceanid/finch reveal but literally anything works, the ending was so anticlimactic

overall event: 10/10 for giving me the character interactions I wanted, and those that I never knew I needed, 5/10 because the minigames are. not the best, I get the intentions but the execution could've been better. And then 5/10 for story arc (heavily influenced by how mid the ending was LMAO)

I want to go through all the poems and their english translations because I Know somethings gonna get screwed up and I'm also just curious as to how they translated it

[shion-yu]

Day 15: “Who decided soup is sick people food?”

Al and Theo making their appearance for @sicktember! 856 words, no TW, hospital setting with a shocking lack of angst, just fluff and banter.

Theo really hated soup. He was never the biggest fan to begin with, but after being stuck to a clear liquid diet for several days he wanted to throw every tepid bowl of broth the hospital served him at the wall. They acted as if beef, chicken and vegetable brother was such a variety, as if it didn’t all taste like the same salty, artificially flavored murky water.

He’d had his gallbladder out two days ago now, and Al kept telling him to be patient - he’d probably be moved up to a full liquid diet today after rounds. Except rounds on this floor were in the afternoon, and Theo was starving. He’d been on clear liquids for forty-eight hours before the surgery while they tried to see if IV antibiotics would do the trick without surgery, and then when they decided it wasn’t he was NPO for the night before and half a day afterwards. They told him they’d take it slow - introduce liquids, then solids. But Elliot swore he could eat an entire roast chicken right now, which Al thought was a very strange statement.

“I’m starving,” he groaned. “What was the point of taking my gallbladder out if I’m going to die of starvation?”

Al shook his head, amused but also slightly fed up with Theo’s complaining by now. He was sitting on the hard hospital couch, legs crossed and reading a book. His thick glasses were sliding down his nose. “You’re definitely not going to die of starvation,” Al reassured him. “Of drama, maybe.”

Theo pouted. “You’re supposed to be nice to me right now,” he said. He was not usually this dramatic, but he was also not usually this hungry.

“I’ve been very nice to you,” Al said, a slight smirk on his lips even though he did not look up from his book. “You just want to eat.”

“Just give me something small,” Theo begged. “If they’re gonna change me to full liquids today anyways, what’s the difference between now and later?” Ice cream was on a full liquid diet, Theo thought to himself. He’d give anything to tear into a banana split right now.

“The difference,” Al said casually, “Is that I’m not a doctor.”

Theo crossed his arms petulantly. “You could be. You know more than some of them.”

“True, but not about gallbladders,” Al responded. He finally put his book down in his lap and looked at Theo in a way that was somehow both judgmental and affectionate. The large window behind him provided lighting that Theo thought made him look exceptionally handsome today, which wasn’t fair because he was trying to be cross right now. “Look, babe, if they don’t come by in time for you to get a real dinner tray, you can have a few sips of my Ensure.”

Theo made a gagging noise on purpose. “Please, those are disgusting.”

“Mhm. And that’s how you know you’re not truly starving. If you were starving for real, you’d take it.”

Theo groaned. “That’s not fair, you tricked me.”

“It’s evidence. For the lawyer.”

“I would rather be sitting in court,” Theo muttered. “I could sneak a protein bar under the bench or something.” They both knew that Theo would never do something so unprofessional, but it was a laughable scene to picture.

It took another two hours for the doctors to finally come by on their rounds. They felt Theo’s abdomen and asked him about how he was feeling, and his response was, “I’ll give you a kidney, too, if you just let me eat something.”

The doctor laughed and agreed to a full liquid diet then, and said if Theo tolerated it for dinner and overnight then he could have a light breakfast with real food too. But of course, doctors never really remembered those little things, and when Theo was served beef broth for dinner again, Al was quick to call the nurse and ask them to get the order changed before Theo had a mental breakdown. Then he went to the cafeteria and got what he knew to be a full liquid diet himself: cream of potato soup, vanilla pudding, orange sherbet and the most important thing, chocolate ice cream. Theo may have shed a genuine tear as he ate everything, even though Al told him to go slowly.

Thankfully, Theo tolerated dinner very well and the nurse obtained an order to move him to a solid diet for breakfast. He was restricted to the low-fat menu which ruled out half of the already limited selection, but Theo didn’t care. He was ready for the blandest toast, the most powdery low-fat egg whites, and sugar free cream of wheat. Just as long as it had substance, he was happy.

After a successful breakfast too, Theo was discharged that following afternoon. He did try to convince Al to make an emergency fast food stop on the way home, which Al immediately rejected. But for the next several weeks, no matter how annoying eating the very bland, low-fat diet Al was feeding him was, Theo took it in stride. As long as it wasn’t soup.

[cyber-viper]

hii may i plz have a romantic haikyuu matchup

Hi my name is rex, i’m queer and use they/them pronouns and i’m 15. And i would prefer someone not over the age of 19 plz. I have like a caramel colored skin-tone (i feel like saying im black may be easier but 🤷🏽‍♀️) and im 5’3.

Rn i have a purple-pink short mullet and i have pretty curly hair, im pretty chubby but i have an hourglass shape (but i have super noticeable hip dips) , i got pretty big fucking tittes (not even in a bragging way, im a fuckin k cup bro😭) and thicc thighs(thicc thighs save lives, sorry i’ll stop). I dress pretty alternative but i cant just choose one subculture tho, i wear a lot of heavy eye makeup. There are times where i dress some what “sexual” but its not sexual cause im 15 and other times i wear a lot of layers.

Honestly I don’t really have a type. Tbh most of my relationships have ended pretty badly cause they ether only wanted something sexual from me or I was “too clingy” when i just wanted basic ass affection. But the most I want is someone who is physically affectionate (like kisses, cuddles, and hugs for days) also im ok with pda to an extent like i will hug and like cuddle you but im not gonna make out with your infront of others thats weird af.

Im a libra sun, scropio moon, and gemini rising. This means that im a pretty social person and always wanna hang out with friends and just have fun, but moon in scropio makes my emotions rlly haywire and kinda boosts any sorta negative emotion, which is hard when you have chronic anxiety and major depressive disorder. Which also means i take medication for it, which i forget a lot. And because of these things i have anxiety tics, where it ranges to making noices and twitching a bit to full on hitting myself and saying random shit. But I really like making people laugh, it makes me feel helpful, but im also good at being to mother figure for people. I also like playfully bantering with people, like i love you but will full on roast you and get into fake fist-fights. I am a bit of a violent person at times but I have a punching bag and boxing gloves which help a lot. But I only get that angry when someone uses an insecurity of mine against me or is talking bad about someone i love, cause it you do that im beating your ass. I do have a bit of body insecurities mainly about my hip-dips and stomach. But because im curvy i get hit on by adults a lot and its creepy as fuck.

My hobbies include art (painting, drawing), sleeping (because i stay up mad late😭✌🏽), reading comics, Marvel and D.C superheroes, and super villains, cartoons, and anime/manga. My favorite music genre’s are rock, alternative, emo, rap, and a little bit if indie music.

Personality: funny, sarcastic, creative, kind, inappropriate and the right times. Like im not gonna pull out a dick joke in front of your family I don’t really have a type and im queer so i dont have a gender preference, but anyone who’s love language is physical affection cause im a clingy bitch.

I have a couple ideal dates, so the first one is like an indoor picnic and a movie, an arcade date, and a stargazing date where you get take out or fast food and drive up a hill to see the stars and you like cuddle n shit.

@rexy26 I match you with Kenma Kozume!

Kenma's more of a private person so probably would not be super into pda but would be affectionate in private with you. in public he would like holding hands but cuddling and kissing is something he prefers to save for when you guys are at home

He's not someone who's focused on looks, he just wants his partner to be tolerant of his more introverted personality and his gaming hobby

He would to to help remind you to take your meds and might set a reminder or alarm on his phone too

You both would be able to help keep each other calm and notice signs of stress or overstimulation in one another, learning each others signals and can be a safe space for each other

appreciates if you stand up for him if he gets teased or shit talked but also isn't that bothered by it himself so would try to calm you down and jut leave to go to something else

Kenma will reassure you about any insecurities you may have about your appearance by giving you quiet blunt compliments that you can tell are sincere

you guys would spend a lot of time staying over at one or the others house staying up late sometimes doing stuff together other times doing seperate things like him gaming and you watching a show or reading a comic while cuddling

would love the idea of an indoor picnic and movie date and you guys could probably cuddle in a pillow fort if you asked him to help you build it and would definitely be down for an arcade date too

A/N: I am so sorry this is soooo late D: I really hope you like your match up. If you are dissatisfied or need clarification for anything I wrote please let me know. I appreciate your request so much <333

[leirsulien-archive]

the adexis brainrot has been so so bad since i replayed the lt i want to rip something apart with my teeth

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Joel overreacting to finding out midge and Lenny got engaged?

He's doing his best.

Really, he is doing his best not to lose his whole damn mind, but it's hard.

Was it this hard for Midge when she found out he and Mei were getting married? When she found out Mei was pregnant? That Joel was really, really, truly, honestly moving on?

Is this how it feels?

Extended Maisel/Weissman dinners are always challenging, especially when everyone is in attendance. Both sets of parents. Midge's brother and his wife. Joel's own parents, and himself and Mei.

It's harder when Midge brings a guy.

It's even harder than that when that guy happens to be Lenny fucking Bruce.

But it's been Lenny fucking Bruce for a while now. Almost two years, and Joel has gotten used to it. They don't talk much, Joel and Lenny. The man is surprisingly quiet a lot of the time. Sure, he chats with Abe and Rose and hangs out quite a bit with Noah, and certainly he banters with Midge, beaming at her and holding her hand. He's even polite to Joel's own parents, and Mei, too, but he's not terribly outgoing the way that Midge is. That way that Joel himself is.

And that's okay. It's all okay. Midge is dating Lenny Bruce. Sure. Great. She seems happy. He seems...fine.

Until tonight, when Midge answered the door with a ring on her finger.

And it's a nice ring, too. Not too big. Some kind of vintage rose gold (pink is Midge's color after all) thing from the 1920's in an art deco style.

And Joel's entire world goes all cockeyed and askew.

"Isn't it wonderful?" Rose beams happily. "They're finally getting married!"

"Mazel tov, you two," Moishe says, and he really means it, which...Joel gets why but still! "When's the wedding?"

"We're going to have it in the fall," Midge smiles. "It's going to be small, but nice."

"Words every father likes to hear," Abe says, patting his daughter's hand affectionately. "Small but small."

"There's always the courthouse," Lenny says, mostly joking.

"Don't you dare," Shirley warns. "Rose has waited too long for Miriam to remarry!"

"I just know it will be beautiful," Astrid smiles, hugging Midge. "We can't wait, can we Noah?"

"I do love an awkward family photo," Noah grins, kissing Midge's temple.

Even Mei looks pleased. "Do you know what you want to wear yet?" she asks.

"Not champagne," Midge says automatically. "Maybe blush. It'll match my ring."

"You better watch out, Lenny, she'll make you wear pink, too," Moishe chuckles.

Lenny grins. "It'd be just like my time in the navy."

And Joel watches. He watches everyone chatter and fawn over Midge and her very fancy ring and her brand new engagement, and he says nothing, because what the fuck can he say? He's happy for her? He is. Kind of. He thinks. He should be. He knows he should be.

She catches his eye from across the room before dinner, tilting her head at him curiously, and he manages a tight grin, before everyone is herded into the dining room to eat.

The food, as always, is delicious. Midge roasted a huge chicken with tangy, salty potatoes to go with it, along with a side salad, and there's cake for dessert, and no one seems uneasy about this. No one seems unhappy or troubled. Everyone just seems excited, and he feels like he's holding all of his feelings in throughout the entire meal.

And after, when everyone is having coffee and cake in the living room, and the kids are being herded off to bed by Shirley, he follows Midge to the kitchen, and is promptly stopped by Noah.

"Joel."

"Noah."

"Whatcha doin, Joel?"

"I just wanted to talk to Midge," he says. "You know. We haven't had a chance to talk tonight, and-"

"Whatcha gonna say, Joel?" Noah asks.

"None of your damn business," Joel says, probably a little harsher than he means to but seriously? Seriously?

"How about you sleep on it," Noah suggests. "And call her in the morning."

"Or I could talk to her right now," Joel argues. "Because she's right on the other side of the door you're blocking."

"Stop talking about me like I can't hear you," Midge calls. "Noah, let him in the kitchen."

Noah rolls his eyes and steps aside, and Joel storms in, glaring back at the older man before turning to Midge.

"Hey."

"Hi," Midge grins pleasantly.

"So," he says, still feeling agitated. "You and Lenny."

"We're engaged," she says, and her smile widens.

She looks so happy.

She used to look happy like that when they were together.

Until he threw a fucking fission bomb at their marriage and blew their lives all to hell.

And he loves Mei, he does. He just-

She looks so much happier than he's felt in a very, very long time.

And he can't bring himself to ruin it.

Not tonight at least.

"Good," he says awkwardly. "Congratulations."

"That means a lot," she says softly. "Thank you."

"Yeah."

"Why are you doing dishes?" Lenny asks from the doorway, looking puzzled.

"Because they need to get done," Midge reminds him.

"You did all the cooking," he says, walking over and nudging her out of the way of the sink playfully. "Move, I got this."

Joel watches then, totally forgotten as Midge kisses Lenny's cheek and doesn't move from her spot next to him and they chat and laugh as he scrubs pots and pans and plates, and Joel thinks back and doesn't remember a time when he ever did any dishes when they were married. Ever thought about dishes, or doing them. They just magically got done.

Except it wasn't magic.

Midge did them.

"I swear, adulthood is just constantly cleaning a fucking kitchen," Lenny grouses playfully. "I never thought about cleaning a kitchen before I hit adulthood and then bam - nothin' but dishes and garbage removal and whatever forgotten science experiments winds up in the back of the refrigerator."

Midge laughs. "I found something back there from when Joel and I were still married. I think it used to be curry."

"Too bad, I really like your curry," Lenny laments.

Joel slips out then, leaving them to their dishes and chatter, and goes out for a fucking smoke.