#and its causing my anxiety to go crazy
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sending people a message should not be this hard dude
#I have to network to pass my senior portfolio class#and its causing my anxiety to go crazy#and its stupid#cause the worst thing they can do really is ignore me#but my brain makes it feel like they'll send a strike team to my house for bothering them#and im not even scared of talking to people#its just that my body freaks out whenever I have to cause it thinks im about to die or something#anxienty#rant#i need to graduate dude im so tired
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#secret diary cause cant be bothered to look for my journal n grab a pen#but#been thinking about something a lot n its giving me a lot of anxiety/ bringing back memories from the past#had a convo with my mom about what happened n how i felt n it DID help talking about it#but i still cant get it off my mind so i think i need to talk to my dad#gotta prepare for it too cause i know im gonna cry n hes probs gonna call asking if everythings okay#its not an easy conversation to have but i feel the need to say something#im having trouble sleeping at night bc of it n i hate being alone with my thoughts atm#actually i dont think its a hard convo to have#its quite easy cause i know what i want to say but i dont think my dad truly knows how bad men are/ can be n how much i hate men#i just can’t articulate my words properly n i feel very strongly about this subject. words just never come out n i get overwhelmed#n lowkey im trying to avoid the convo- like i wanna send a text even though i should call or go see my dad in person like how i told my mom#however i have to speak or else i will likely never get this off my chest again n im struggling rn#so i am reaching out cause i know i can rely on my dad but this convo is gonna lead to another#i had smthing typed in my notes but i started crying while writing it#crazy cause you never really know who people are esp family#been watching movies all day cause music aint enough to keep my mind from wandering
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eye twitches killing torture violence
#i am once again asking if staff could please just let me know if we have new staff starting#not even far in advance just like day before to let me know so im not caught off guard#especially cuz its staff like these are people im going to be interacting with#and once again i am being told they ��aren’t obliged’ to tell me#like yeah i know you arent obliged and yeah i know its not always going to be possible#but im ASKING you to. because i funnily enough am still autistic and new people and changes without warning#cause me so much anxiety and i feel like that paying me the basic respect i ask for#in order to accommodate my disability that i literally have a place in this supported living for.#would just be overall the better thing to do#like its not crazy difficult i literally dont need to know anything else like genuinely i just want to know a name and if they are in the#fucking building or not#THATS! IT!#i know im not being crazy i know im not but they keep saying like ‘oh we aren’t obliged’ or ‘what does it have to do with you’#AND ITS LIKE THIS IS LITERALLY IN MY CARE PLAN. I DONT KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I CAN KEEP BEING TOLD BULLSHIT LIKE THIS.
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#soo i just sent an email to my new uni requesting a change in preferred name from deadname to Lean (short for Leander)#i havent found sleep over this decision all week#and pondered#Leander is too masc because i dont pass yet and dont want people to actively stumble over me name#i nearly settled on Jona as its more gender ambiguous and like _almost_ my deadname#but THEN my friend came out the me as nonbinary with the name Jona#and all my friends are like dadadada it was so easy to change to Leander because the name just fits you!#and i love the name Leander....#so im like fuck it#getting so fucking serious and changing my name for the first time for real causes me so much anxiety#aaaah i cant wait to be discriminated against#but if one more person calls me by my deadname im going crazy i dont want to girlmode anymore fr#personal
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stitches | d.w.

synopsis: dean texts you for help, and you drop everything for him.
requested by: @dingo-ate-my-hot-lettuce-crazy
pairing: pre-series!dean winchester x reader
word count: 1.6k+
warnings: fluff, some angst, john winchester, blood, wounds/injury, stitching up wounds, typical spn series warnings. no use of y/n, no pronouns used!
a/n: if john winchester has no haters, i'm dead <33 also, it's currently 12am, so if the editing is a little wonky, pls forgive me
You gripped the steering wheel tightly, knuckles turning white as you navigated through the torrential downpour hammering down around you and your car. The rain was relentless, blinding you as it pounded against the windshield. The smell of wet asphalt filled your car as the tires slipped on the rain-soaked road. Your heartbeat pounded in your ears – a mixture of adrenaline from trying to avoid a horrific car wreck and anxiety from the message still illuminating your car in a dim light.
I need your help.
It wasn’t a message you were expecting. Normally, in your line of work, pleas for help came in the form of a frantic phone call or a scream in the dark. They never came in the form of a random text message.
And they never came from Dean Winchester.
You were having a relatively normal night, working a case and staking out a couple of vamps, when your phone buzzed with several messages from Dean. First, he asked if you were busy. Then, he asked if you were nearby. Moments later, he sent you an address to a motel. Then, came the message that caused you to leave the stakeout completely and go frantically speeding down the road.
Your tires screeched as you rounded a corner. The neon light of the motel soon appeared ahead, its reflection dancing across the many puddles on the asphalt. You pulled into the first parking spot you saw and stepped out of your car. The rain immediately soaked you to the bone, wetting your hair and your clothes, sending a chill through you, but you couldn't find yourself caring as your eyes scanned for Dean's room number.
The motel was rather seedy-looking – more so than normal. The wooden palings were splitting, and the paint was chipping off the trimmings and walls. There wasn't any other car in sight. You wondered just how bad things were if Dean had found himself in a place like this.
Once you found his room, you practically ran over to the door and threw it open, not bothering to knock. Your eyes immediately landed on Dean, who sat on the edge of one of the beds, his back to you. A wave of relief washed over you – he was alive – but the sight of his tense shoulders and the untouched beer bottle in his hand kept your anxiety simmering.
You closed the door behind you and took off your saturated jacket, leaving it next to Dean's leather one.
"Hey," you said with a sigh, "You okay?"
Dean responded with a curt nod but said nothing more. You stepped closer to him and placed your hand gently on his shoulder. He flinched at the touch, and you felt a pang in your chest. When you finally got close enough, you quickly scanned his face. The bags under his eyes were darker than usual, and his normally sharp gaze was clouded with exhaustion. HIs hair was wet and spiky, and his lip trembled from the cold.
Your eyes continued to trail down to his side, where his shirt clung to his skin, dark and wet with blood. Three jagged and deep gashes spread across Dean's side. His shirt was torn.
Your eyes widened as panic once again surged through you. You frantically looked around for anything you could use to stop the bleeding. You grabbed the first towel you could get your hands on and pressed it to his side, grimacing when Dean winced in pain.
"Jesus, Dean. What the hell happened?"
"Werewolf," he gritted out.
"I think you're gonna need stitches."
There was no first aid kit in sight, so your mind began running through alternatives. You could go to the front desk and ask if there were any supplies, but asking for anything more than a simple band-aid would cause suspicion, and the last thing you needed was someone knocking on the door asking too many questions.
You could use dental floss. You had known plenty of hunters that used it in the past and not had a problem, but you weren't sure there were any needles…
"There's a sewing kit in the bathroom."
You raised your eyebrows in surprise. "You read my mind."
“One of my many talents.”
----
Needle, thread, dental floss, tissues, water. You looked over the supplies in front of you, mind racing at a million miles an hour. Despite being a hunter yourself, you weren’t exactly a natural when it came to stitching wounds and performing first aid. In fact, the sight of too much blood caused your head to throb and your legs to go numb.
Dean had already taken off his shirt, leaving you to see the full extent of his injuries. The gashes started at the top of his ribs and curled around to his left shoulder blade. Blood continued to trail down his back, causing your mouth to go dry. Pins and needles tingled your toes, and the room began to spin…
You shook off your thoughts and shifted your weight between your two feet, hoping to get some blood flow back there. You put your thoughts and discomfort behind you and prepared to begin.
“This isn’t gonna feel great,” you said, trying to control the shake in your voice.
“Not my first time,” he replied.
You grabbed the needle and thread, and – with shaky hands – tried your best to thread the cotton through the eye. You sat behind him, deciding to start around his shoulder. With a damp cloth, you tried your best to clean around the area, whispering apologies whenever Dean flinched.
“What happened?” you asked quietly, using your gentlest touch to guide the needle through.
“I told you,” he said through gritted teeth, “werewolf.”
“Yeah, I know, but…” you trailed off. “Where’s your dad?”
Dean clenched his jaw, and you immediately knew you had touched on a rough subject. Throughout the time that you had known Dean, you had learnt his relationship with his father was far from healthy. John Winchester was not your favourite person in the world. In fact, you and Dean had gotten into plenty of arguments about him in the past.
“He’s not here.”
“That’s not what I meant,” you said, continuing your stitching. “Why isn’t he here?”
“Do we have to do this–?”
“--Yes.”
Dean sighed, scrubbing his hand down his face. The anger and tension radiating off him was palpable, his shoulders were tense and his breathing was heavy. You finished stitching the first gash, and tied the thread off with a neat little knot. Instead of immediately moving on to the next one, you moved around and knelt in front of Dean so you were eye level. You placed a hand on his right knee and traced gentle circles into his skin with your thumb. You raised your eyebrows, sending him a look that was simultaneously stern and empathetic.
You just wanted to know he was okay.
“We’d been stakin’ out the thing for weeks,” Dean began. “We finally pinpointed it to this boathouse. Dad was sure that it was in there, so he sent me in first to sweep the area.”
“And…?”
“Turns out it was a lot smarter than we thought,” Dean said, a dejected smile on his lips. “It was waitin’ there for us. Dad knew, but I didn’t.”
“Then why did he send you in there?”
Dean shrugged. “Couldn’t tell you. But the thing had me on the ground before I even realized what was goin’ on. Put it’s claws in me and ran.”
You shuddered.
“Dad didn’t stay,” Dean continued. “The second he realised it jumped ship, he went too. Left me with my phone and wallet… I walked here.”
“What?”
If Dean’s anger was palpable, you were damn-near irate. You pressed your lips together, trying to control yourself from spewing all sorts of profanities. If you had it your way, you would have marched your way up to John Winchester and given him what for. You would have knocked his lights out if Dean had let you.
You stood and pressed the heels of your palms to your eyes.
"He – you? God!"
"Alright hot-head, calm down."
"No, I will not calm down!" You spun on your heel, turning to face him again. "Your own father left you for dead!"
"He's done worse."
You laughed bitterly. "That doesn't surprise me."
"Alright," Dean sighed, raising a hand to stop your tirade. "I'm okay! I'm still here, aren't I?"
"Oh yeah, you're the pinnacle of okay."
"Your sarcasm isn't helping."
You shook your head. Angry tears pricked the corners of your eyes, but you were too stubborn to let them fall.
"I just wish you would understand that you deserve better," you said, trying to keep your voice steady. "You could leave his ass behind any time you like -"
"Oh yeah? And then what?"
You paused, and looked down to your feet.
"You could come with me?"
For half a second, Dean smiled. “You and I would kill each other in half an hour.”
He was right – but you’d never let him admit it.
“Why’d you text me then?” You asked. “If we’re just gonna kill one another–”
Dean shot you a pointed look.
“– I’m serious.” You said.
Dean stood up with a groan and walked over to you. You stood with your arms crossed, a slight frown creasing your brow. Nothing could be heard but the rain that battered against the windows and the thundering of your own heartbeat in your ears.
Dean tucked a strand of your wet hair behind your ear, “You’re the first one I thought of… The only one I wanted here.”
A blush crept onto your cheeks and you shook your head fondly. “You’re fantastic at changing the subject.”
Dean winked, but his smooth-talking was soon replaced by a painful scowl.
“Let’s finish this up later, shall we? I’d rather not bleed to death.”
You helped Dean back to the bed and prepared to finish stitching him up. You knew this was far from over – with Dean, it never was – but for now, you would focus on the rain that pattered against the roof and the relief that Dean was with you, safe.
#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x reader fluff#dean winchester fluff#supernatural#dean winchester#spn#dean winchester x you#dean x reader#dean winchester x female!reader#dean x you#dean x y/n#dean winchester x y/n#supernatural fanfiction#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester fic#dean fluff#dean fic#supernatural fic#*my writing
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DO YOU SEE HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU?
synopsis: a yandere who is a crybaby tries his best to maintain you now that you were kidnapped by him, but the moment he arrives home from work you notice his eyebags, and when he hears you call for him the first time, his whole self crumbles infront of you. (4.3k) warnings: love obsession, kidnapping, anxiety, depression, anger issues, self-harm, overworking, cursing, overthinking reader's gn a/n: literally my desired type of yandere... let me know what you think about it, i love reading your opinions!

he has kidnapped you weeks ago now, and ever since then, you have not spoke for the life of you. he even tried hearing anything you might get to say when you're all alone through the cameras he had installed for your arrival at his home, but to no avail—you haven't said anything.
he knew you might be struggling—he knew you would since the beginning—he knew you would take your time to get accostumed to this new and strange life with him, but had hopelessly thought it would be quicker and softer than whatever it's happening right now.
he knew you liked to talk yourself out whenever you were alone (or thought you were), so he didn't get it how were you standing so strong on your need to not say a word.
whenever he asks if you are hungry? if you're thirsty? cold? bored? you just look at him with those dull eyes of you, which of course had given him chills on more than one ocasion now, and he doesn't like that either—but what else can he do? he's in the edge of collapsing.
he's done everything he can to finish off work as quick as possible and try to spend more time by your side and see if something could change, expecting a miracle to happen so you'd be in a better mood and maybe finally telling him a simple yes or no when he asks if its ok to cuddle that night with you. he'd end up doing it whatever you say though—but maybe, just maybe, if you do use your voice to tell him not—he'd obey. he's got that desperate nowadays.
you got him going crazy, mind spiralling so much these days he can't focus on anything but trying to remember your voice and searching—thinking of anything that might get you to talk to him.
he's begged, he feels miserable admitting it, but he's gotten on his knees and pleaded you to voice at least one of your thoughts, to insult him or tell him how angry you feel with him—but none of that ever comes. he's left in tears, facing the floor with bruised fists of so much hitting the ground in desperation.
did you know what you were doing to him? he always thought you did, because if you didn't, you wouldn't deprive yourself so much in the sake of seeing him suffer—would you? he really hopes not, he already thinks you hate him enough but not to that extent.
weeks had turned into months and he's gotten promoted on his job to a higher rank without knowing why 'cause he's been more scattered than usual—whatever, now he's gotten a higher salary, he planned on spoiling you even more. he doesn't plan on hurting you to talk to him, no no, it's the other way around—he plans on making you the happiest ever to get to see you recover to your normal self—to smile at him.
however, as this new rank had its perks, it had its drawbacks as well. he wouldn't spend much time with you anymore and that got him thinking twice about signing the papers—but as his more depressed voice on his mind told him—if you aren't talking to him now, maybe if you miss him enough you'll do, and when he goes back home with lots of presents for you, you'll change your mind about this silent treatment nightmare.
yeah. he'd take the offer.
he didn't expect the work to be as insufferable as it has come to be, he's gotta deal with lots of clients a day while going in and out of meetings with some superiors while teaching juniors how to start with the business. to say he's going even crazier would be an understatement—he's losing his sanity.
however, something peculiar about him is that he doesn't like lashing out with the first person who makes him snap, no, he's a sensible man—a crybaby. he doesn't scream his lungs out when things aren't going his way, he doesn't grab by the collar a stupid costumer nor does he slap the shit out of those who take advantage of him because of this same reasons—he just cries, cries and hurts himself as he punches the walls that protect his dignity even by being all alone and letting all his feelings flow along his tears.
so he arrives home one of this tiring and stressing days—expecting you to be locked on your shared room, hugging your knees as close as possible to do not meet him in the eye—he expected everything to be as quiet, as cold and as dark as a cave.
he's been dealing all by himself the tasks of taking care of yourself, he's prepared some meals and had ordered take out every now and then as well, he's bought you some clothing and let you choose yourself via app to order some more or even things for hobbies he knew you had before taking you captive.
he knew the routine by now, and thinking about repeating it all over again day and day didn't bother him at all as long as he had you much than now.
he's wearing himself out for some dream he knew wasn't bound to happen until you'd let it—until you love him. until you love him too.
he was pretty confident on himself before kidnapping you it'd come to happen one day or another, but having been as long as it has already been, he's not sure anymore.
you weren't showing any signs of letting your guard down, of trusting him even a bit, nothing—you just looked so empty.
or that's what he thought at least.
when he'd first taken you from away from your life you were scared, angry, anxious and mostly, sad. you couldn't comprehend your thoughts as your mind raced miles per minute with everything that was happening at once.
there was this man who had come up with you and messily but sort of sweetly confessed his love to you, a very intense one as he let see. the next second—as you told him you didn't know him so you politely rejected his feelings—he was on you putting a cloth on your mouth and nose.
when you woke up, you were on a place you had never seen and the same man appeared and gave you a welcome—with a sheepish smile and looking like a teenager in love—told you to feel comfortable around here and to not be afraid to ask for anything, that he'd provide all your needs in the blink of an eye.
you were incredulous, you couldn't believe he was so devoted to you as to know each and every one of your likings, dislikes, hobbies, prefered music, everything. maybe he even knew you better than you knew yourself—it scared you.
how were you expected to respond to all that love bombing? you were scared and sad when he'd explained you wouldn't leave the house ever again, or atleast until he deemed it possible, as he still thought you would try to escape from him—and of course you agreed on your mind.
but you were that afraid of anything he might do that your body wouldn't obey you. you wanted to scream so loud but the only thing that ever came out were tears of frustration—tears holding the deep feelings you were holding from not talking for so long with someone else—even when he's been a "gentleman" and asked you to talk to him so many times.
you just wouldn't budge, sometimes because of the anger, some others because of fear and mostly nowadays because you were giving up your life altogether.
no one has come here, to wherever this house was. when he's turned on the tv there were no reports on missing people, you didn't have your phone either so you got no messages from family members or friends asking where were you or if you were ok, you missed all of that and wish you could matter some more to all of them to have already found you. but they hadn't—they weren't really looking that deep on anything for time to have passed so slow yet so fast that it'd already been half a year and there was nothing from them.
no one cared about you—or so you thought until you saw him one day arriving to the house looking so tired, with eyebags so marked and sluggish steps going straight to the bedroom to leave his suitcase and greet you as usual with the same sheepish smile and a kiss on your forehead. you thought no one cared about you—but as he then dragged his tired body to the kitchen to get started on making your favorite dish for the nth time on the month, you weren't so sure anymore.
you were starting to trust a little bit on him, but reprimanded yourself so hard on your mind that you were left exhausted mentally everyday with your dilemma.
you needed to distract yourself, you couldn't bear that all the things you were bottling up on your throat before they could even taste the tip of your tongue would always swirl around your mind and dreams to get turned on nightmares being awake or not so often now.
so you got up from the bed one day and took tiny and doubtfull steps to the kitchen after your kidnapper had left for work—not without giving you your forehead kiss of course.
upon arriving to your today's destiny, you put on the apron he's showed many times before to you telling you he bought specially for you for when you're on the mood of joining him to help on preparing the food for the day.
a smile crossed your features without knowing. it had a design of your favorite animal on a cartoonish style printed cutely on it.
you got a look around the shelfs and the refrigerator to mentally make a list about possible recipes you could get done with everything there is.
before living whatever the hell this all has been you see—even if you weren't so doted on it—you liked cooking. trying out recipes only you could mix up and to your contentment, the majority of your dishes would end up being to your family's and friends' liking.
you got absorbed on making a specific dish that your bad thoughts were all forgotten and replaced by the thought of seeing your plate finished and the smile of your captor when seeing it.
how would he react? would he be angry? suspicious of your sudden actions? there's no poison around here so there would be no need for him to worry about anything like that though...
you admitted you would feel a bit sad if he were to talk badly about your cooking skills, but still were adamant on trying to get it done, so persevered and as the clock hit the time he was supposed to get out of work as he's told you weeks ago for his new rank, you had plated two sets of your soup and main dish along a mini dessert at the sides.
you felt anxious—your stomach wasn't as hungry as you thought when you smelled the soup cooking up minutes ago, no—you were nervous.
as some time passed and the clock hit the next hour, you decided to take a shower to hopefully get the warm water to calm your racing heart and wild butterflies in your belly.
you put on some of the clothes you've chosen and accesories he's bought you that made you feel comfortable to turn on the tv and continue watching a movie.
however, you kept glancing the clock every five minutes approximately and grew even more anxious and disappointed when it had passed two hours since he was supposed to arrive.
he's has never begged so hard for earth to just swallow him up so many times before in a day but here he was. his boss had left on unannounced vacations for a whole month and dumped all his responsibilities on him while a new course had opened for recently graduated juniors to get experience on the area, and just when he thought it couldn't get worse—an important partner of the company had demanded a meeting with the same person missing for some stupid vacation on miami now of all times.
everytime he turned around at any room there would be a new person or a colleague asking him for favors, questions he's felt he's answered hundreds of times already, to sign so many papers he's not sure he's really doing his best to keep his signature the same 'cause his hand hurts so much. his feet are aching and his headache is doing nothing but making the day feel endless.
he wants to arrive home already—he wants to go with you even if you'd just look at your arms or knees instead of him—he's one hundred percent sure that'd be better than all this chaos.
he hadn't had the time to check out on you now that he thinks about it. but just as that thought occurs, another phone rings and he has to sit on a new chat with an angry client, slowly getting so overwhelmed with it that he forgets about checking the app on his phone that had become a salvation for moments like this—where he sees your every movement around his house, even if its not that much.
and just as he had thought—the workload wouldn't let him go rest at his designated time, no, it would prolong until two more hours later of suffering. he wanted to cry so bad now.
when the last colleague had left and the company's lights finally turned off, he almost felt his soul leave his body from relief.
he tried his best to grab his things and return home as quick as possible, but his swollen feet from all the walking around offices, dizzy mind and buzzing ears made it an impossible task. he stumbled upon every stone on his path to his car, almost crashed it and could be seen sleeping on every red light.
he wanted to be with you right on that instant so badly he swore he could die happily even if that was the last thing he did.
as he parked his car and as carefully and silently as he could opened the front door to do not wake you—he let out a sigh he didn't know he was holding all the way until here, closing his arms and trying to stretch his legs for the muscles to relax now that he's in a safe space.
when he opened his eyes, the first thing he noticed was the turned on tv with the netflix warning reading "are you still watching?" for when a show had ended but no movement was made after some minutes. then, his eyes instantely fell on the back of your head resting on the couch of the living room. he took more steps in in the way of your bedroom to leave his suitcase as always—but the scene before it left him astonished.
the table was set up—cutlery placed neatly and deliciously looking food put on the bowls and plain dishes it made his mouth water almost instantly, but most importantly, his heart started beating fast and his cheeks reddened. soon, his eyes let out all his frustrations from the day into salty tears and broken sobs came from his dry throat and deeply overwhelmed mind and heart.
you had prepared it. you prepared all this for the two of you. the set for the other person accross the table was untouched which meant you hadn't eaten either. you were waiting for him too—you waited for him. to eat dinner—to eat dinner together.
he felt like he died and reborn once more. he wasn't taking it easy and dropped his suitcase without thinking the noise would startle you. his hands going straight to his eyes to stop his with his waterfalls and choke down his sobs.
you woke up startled by the noise of... him crying? oh no, he'd arrived and you've fallen asleep! he's already seen the surprise but maybe he hadn't like it? you felt terrible, your stomach dropping upon seeing him desperately rubbing his eyes and crumbling on the dining room's floor.
you got up and came behind him, taking into account that because of his loud crying he hadnt' noticed you. you got worried for him—just as you got worried all those times ago when he'd cry and beg for you to talk and look at him—you didn't like seeing him cry, but he wouldn't stop.
so you spoke.
"hey," something as simple as that but you did it. something you hadn't done for the almost seven months you've been trapped with someone you barely knew but had told you he'd fallen deeply in love with you—with someone who'd spent everyday since then showing you—his in fact—endless love for you.
he stopped his crying immediately, shoulders tensing and mind short-circuiting. did you just—did you just talk to him?
"i-i'm sorry if it's not of your liking, i-i just-i just thought about making dinner but never really asked for permission-i'm-i'm so sorry"—you rambled, now that you started speaking you couldn't really stop yourself anymore.
your mind now freely spoke everything it came to it, forgetting about the overthinking you did about the right moments or right words—you just did it.
he wasn't really reacting. how could he? he didn't know what to do or say—many things he's dreamed of had happened in the spawn of five minutes since he's arrived.
he turned slowly to face you, the light hitting him from the back didn't let his swollen red eyes and runny nose from all the crying be seen easily—but you could see his form shivering—he's holding his tears back now. just as you got surprised by the sudden recover of your voice, he also was.
so you spoke up again, but this time with your actions.
you took some steps closer to him—coming face to face with his chest as he was a lot taller than you—and wrapped your arms around him.
you were doing anything before thinking further on it, really. he started crying even harder this time. almost making you retract yourself but you didn't—you didn't want to let go.
he's proved you he would mantain you—he's given you some kind of freedom under his roof and brought you so many things that on your previous lifestyle you could only dream of. he's talked for the two of you all this time you were deprived of it—even if he felt bad about it—he never hurt you or said bad things to you. he encouraged you to, he really demonstrated he did all of what he did because of love.
and you've fallen for it.
now that he had everything he's asked for he couldn't react as he thought he would. he thought that whenever it was that you would hug him first, he'd instantely reciprocate the affection and drown you whole on it. he'd smother you with tons of kisses and tell you so many cheesy lines even he'd feel grossed out from them, but he wouldn't care 'cause you wouldn't care either, you'd be happy—happy together.
after some minutes of you holding him together on your arms as he sobbed out uncomprehensible lines and looked at you through blurry eyes, you ended the hug and unconsciously moved your hands to take place on both of his cheeks so sweetly—so carefully as he if he's made of porcelain—and stared into his eyes so deeply his knees got weak, your eyes were full of love—they were screaming it—he could hear it.
you've fallen for him—you've really done it.
you looked from his wide-puppy-like eyes to his lips as if asking permission for sealing this silent promise of eternal love you've sentenced upon the two of you since you hugged him.
he nodded his head a little and sucked in a breath as if preparing for what's to come. you reached closer—neither closing your eyes just yet until you connected your lips with his.
it felt as if the world stopped for seconds—it felt right—so damn right. he finally got rid of his frozen posture and placed one of his hands on behind your head and the other on your hips to pull you closer, while you focused on laying all your emotions for him on that kiss—that special and never-forgettable moment you'd just share.
you lasted some seconds more until he pulled away to look at you in the eye, look at you already looking at him—not like all those times in the past when he'd have to search for your eyes—you shared the same warmth as he's shared for you all this time until now, for him.
"i love you so much," his mouth let out, reciting it out in the open once again as he's done for so many nights on the past even if you didn't tell him anything.
but to his surprise, today you'd decided to reciprocate it. "i love you too."
four words, eleven vocal tones united to form four words that all come together meaning such a common yet powerful feeling humans feel for another—another human or thing, moment or memory—this being confessed only when seem proper, mostly when two people mean it, not without a risk of course—risk of losing it all but said with the confidence of it not happening. said with the hope it won't—hoping this love would flourish into something deeper and comfortable in many forms, the forms of a house, a family—an eternity together.
four words that made him remember why he's loved you so much and felt all his time spent on you was worth every single second.
"i'm so happy with you, i-i love you," he repeated, this time taking your hands on his bigger ones, and his smile so big that his teeth were showing and eyes almost closing resembling that of a child getting the latest toy they wanted.
you squeezed softly and started to walk without letting go, to the table—only doing so when you went to take out the chair for him to have a seat and gently indicating him so, picking up the cold plates and going to warm them up in the microwave.
he's eyes never left your form—just as when he'd watch you while doing paperwork through the cameras—he was and would always be infatuated with you. he felt so blessed in that moment and thanked whatever came to his mind for what was happening.
as much as he'd like to help you out right now—he just felt so tired and so enraptured with your movements that he stayed still until you returned with the food and placed it down again on its place, smiling softly at him and taking a seat too.
he took the first bite, already thinking it would taste delicious if it came from you, savoring it he noticed how wrong he was—it tasted heavenly. his face relaxed and he started eating faster, devoring everything as his now more than empty stomach begged for some food after the long hours he's spent without eating.
you took it as a good sign and felt relieved—finally digging in—you both finished fairly quickly and as you were about to wash the dishes, he came behind you saying, "let me get those done, you've already cooked for the both of us, it's the least i can do."
"no, you've just come from working, and if i decided to cook then i'm in charge of cleaning them too." you defended, taking the gloves and almost putting them on before he negotiated, "then what about doing them tomorrow, i'm so tired right now i'd like to just hug you all night." he smirked after seeing you ponder for a bit, he got you.
"fine... i'll-i''ll wake up early to clean them before you even think of doing so!" you claimed, taking off the gloves and tangling your arm around his, both of you walking to the bedroom.
"i'll undo the bed, you can go change," you offered, going up to it and starting to place the decorative pillows on the armchair next to the desk in the bedroom—where he'd often spend restless nights firstly figuring out his plan to get you, and when he'd gotten you—nights planning out how to get you to fall for him, now he's watching you place those pillows yourself, undoing the bed and taking place on it as if you were already a married couple.
he changed to his pajamas carelessly, tossing his uniform on his wardrobe and shoes long-forgotten somewhere on the carpeted floor of the dressing room that covered the whole bedroom as well.
he then let himself fall on the bed, arms looking out immediately for your body and wrapped gently yet tightly around you, taking a deep breath on the side of your neck and letting all his worries vanish from his mind by having you all to himself like this.
"good night," you whispered, hands going to play with his hair and caressing it softly as if petting a cat, he felt like he'd most definitely end up purring too.
"good night, my love."
PT. 2 HERE

here's my yandere OC's m.list if you wanna read more! remember you can ask to be tagged at any of the fandoms i write for ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡

#𝟎𝟎𝟖 | mitsua#reader insert#x reader#love#yandere#yandere male#yandere oc#yandere x reader#yandere x you#gender neutral reader#yandere character#yandere tw#soft yandere#male yandere#yanderecore#yandere obsession#yande.re#yancore#yandere ocs#male yandere x reader#yandere oc x reader#yandere imagines#yandere oc x you#yandere oc x y/n#angst#yandere fluff#yandere angst#love obsession#i love you#obsessive love
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soooo I wrote this for the art god @devotion-disorder because
1- they're one of my favorite artists ever!!!!!!! And they're someone who portrays yanderes in such a 😙🤌 chef's kiss way that I can't help but admire
2- I am obsessed with their oc kuuya
but if you'd rather I delete it, just let me know!!
Warnings: NSFW, yandere behavior, unhealthy obsession !!! Minors DNI !!!
Part 2 of this fic here <3
The skin on the nape of your neck prickled, making you shiver at the strange sensation.
The steady gaze outside your window was so piercing and unmoving that it could be as sharp as needles nicking your skin.
Although, if you were to be fully honest, it felt more like a knife.
It would be just another night, if it wasn't for the fact that your co-worker lurked outside your house.
"Kuuya", you mouthed his name, just to feel how it moves against your lips, because you could never really say it during daytime without having him spiral headfirst into a meltdown.
Kuuya was a disaster.
He never talked to you.
You would sometimes catch him staring at you during work, which made him blush like an anime schoolgirl, but that was the extent of his interaction with you.
He was a regular employee, didn't stand out much, nor caused problems. He was just... there. Constantly looking exhausted, with his back hunched and in the verge of a mental breakdown.
And you were so attracted to that mess of a man.
Your friends would probably frown and sigh if they knew, but they were also pretty much aware of your type: sickly victorian-looking men, anemic, with extremely dark circles under their eyes, who probably sneeze a lot and shake like chihuahuas.
And, hey, that was Kuuya to a T. How could you not have a crush on him?
You soon realized, however, that he probably had a few screws loose.
It started slow, a few things going missing. First it was a pen, then some of your hair ties, then old post-it notes you had forgotten about, until their absence reminded you of their existence.
These things were inconsequential.
You wouldn't even notice their disappearance, if it wasnt for the fact that one day you saw Kuuya with a fluffy hair tie that looked way too similar to yours to be a coincidence. It even had the same little star charm that yours had.
And then you noticed the pens, carefully placed inside a cup near his computer.
And the erasers, the post-its, the pencils, all the other office appliances that you were pretty sure were yours.
But they weren't, right?
That was just your fertile imagination playing tricks on you.
Right?
One day, just to erase this silly idea from your head – I mean, you were probably just paranoid – you waited until you saw Kuuya take a break from his assignments and make his way to the bathroom.
You observed through the corner of your eyes how he stared at you while making his way to the other side of the office, anxiously shaking your leg as you mentally egged him to hurry up and go to the damn toilet.
As soon as you were sure he was inside and you were out his sight, you bolted towards his desk, earning a few pissed off glances from your other coworkers.
You had to work quickly though, since you didnt know how long he would take to come back. Looking over your shoulder constantly, you opened the drawers under his desk, searching for something and feeling silly all the while (what if you're the crazy paranoic one for real?), until your hands haphazardly touched some papers and you heard the sound of crinkles.
Looking over your shoulder one more time to make sure he wasn't around, you lifted the papers and mouthed a silent "oh." as you saw what was underneath them.
Dozens and dozens of candy wrappers, discarded notes and even more of those old post-its laid organized in what you could say was impeccable fashion, if it wasnt for the fact that it was all trash.
Your trash.
In the back, you saw some plastic bags with questionable contents, but your anxiety was in an all time high and you decided to just put things back were they were and close the drawer.
You had your confirmation. He WAS crazy and you were still paranoid, but at least you were right.
You made way back to your desk and sighed, sitting down.
Conflicted feelings pooled in your gut.
You knew all of that meant that he was indeed crazy and obsessed and potentially dangerous, but also... you couldn't really deny the excitement that made butterflies fly all around in your stomach and the giddy feeling that made your heart race with expectations – of what, you didn't know.
And as these feeling swarmed you, you failed to realize the pair of eyes that were locked tight onto your figure from the very start.
If Kuuya could properly express his feelings, he would be moaning and whining in pure despair.
They saw everything. They saw where he keeps all his treasures he had been collecting for the past months.
But why?! Why did they even think about looking for that? Has Kuuya been acting too obvious? But he made sure he wouldn't be too creepy! Well, at least not as creepy as he truly wanted to be. How was that happening all of a sudden?!
The taste of copper interrupted his mental breakdown and he looked down at his thumb, where tiny droplets of blood appeared after he anxiously chewed it.
"It's okay, it's fine" he kept repeating in his mind, like a mantra. He'd just need to see how you'd act around him after that.
If you stopped interacting with him (even if most of those interactions were just good mornings and good evenings coming from YOU), he would probably just... end it all for once. Or maybe kidnap you so you wouldn't run away. Whatever crossed his mind first.
With his heart beating loud on his chest, Kuuya walked back to his seat and forced himself to work, spreadsheets and numbers flashing on his mind, unnoticed.
All he could think was of your hands rummaging through his drawers.
Oh god, your hands touched his things.
Kuuya exhaled sharply, rubbing his thighs together to alleviate the sudden discomfort in his groin. What would he do if you never even looked at his direction again? Sure, you could even report him to the HR, but not being able to see you was a fate worse than being fired!
His mind tumbled, wandering through every worst scenario possible, and in his despair, he didn't notice it was already time to clock out.
"Good evening, Kuuya." You say as you pass by him, nodding your head, with a tight smile.
'Huh?'
Kuuya stares at nothing in front of him, until the fact that you talked to him registers in his mind.
'HUH?'
You talked to him?
Wait.
Did you really see what was in his drawers? Was he just hallucinating? No, there's no way he was. He saw how your colleagues stared at you when you ran to his table. They SAW you. Just like he did. So you saw everything. And you don't hate him? What the fuck. You don't find him disgusting? What? What the hell.
He didn't understand.
He couldn't understand.
He had to understand.
And so, he led himself towards your house, hiding in the bushes right in front of your bedroom window.
How lucky was he that you didn't live in an apartment building?
He was there to understand you better. Just for that. And it'd be just this time, he swore. Just to see what was up with you.
His breath was ragged and heavy and his cheeks burned red. He bit his bottom lip tightly to keep any moan from escaping as he palmed himself through his pants, while he watched the way you stripped yourself of your work clothes.
Quickly undoing his belt buckle and his pants, he let himself be completely overtaken by pure lust and began pumping his dick mercilessly as he was graced with just a little bit more of your skin, right in front of him.
He saw you sigh as you got rid of your pants and his eyes rolled back, imagining how you'd sound if he was the one taking your clothes off.
Oh, what would he give to be able to jump through your window and grab one of your dirty clothes and get drunk on your scent...
The thought made him buck his hips forward clumsily, and he gritted his teeth, hard.
Well, fuck.
He panted, while he observed the way his cum dripped from the leaves of the bush, and as coherent thoughts started flowing back to his mind, he suddenly hoped he wasn't moving too much to catch your attention.
You hadn't even looked his way, so he was safe, right?
Right?
You rubbed your thighs together as you kept your back turned to the window. The windowpane was open, in order to allow the wind to flow through your bedroom, and due to this little fact, you could hear a faint sound coming from the plants right in front of your window.
A quiet, almost indiscernible (if you weren't paying close attention) plap plap plap sound.
You bit your lip to keep your grin from spreading through your lips.
The dumbass was masturbating! Right there! Right in front of your room!
You sighed, feeling the heat pool in between your legs, but controlled your instinct to pull him out from wherever he was and fuck him silly in your bedroom.
You desired him so fucking much. You thrived in his attention, like a sunflower leaning towards rays of light.
The thing is: while you loved his obsession, you were also deathly afraid that he would lose interest in you as soon as he found out how much you also wanted him.
Much like a cat who discards a prey. Except this cat was wet, sad, pathetic and still, you were ridiculously eager to keep playing dead so he would put his grimy, sticky little paws on you just a little bit more.
How would Kuuya feel, you wondered, if he knew you were as obsessed with him as much as he was with you?
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DEATH WISH LOVE | EVAN BUCKLEY
gif credit
Pairing: Evan Buckley x fem!reader
Summary: Buck never thought he could love someone like that. Especially not someone with the same death wish love as him.
Warning: Anxiety crisis, near-death experience, hospital, crying, ansgt.
Word count: 2.5K
a/n: My God, I can't believe it's taken me over a year to get back. I missed this place so much. It's been an intense, crazy year. I finally got my dream job at the best hospital in Latin America. I'm so happy, but at the same time it's demanded everything of me, working long shifts almost every day, but its the price I have to pay. I hope you like this one, it was based on the song Death Wish Love by Benson Boone, which as soon as I heard it I immediately imagined something with our dear Buck. I confess I thought I'd do something angsty, but I don't think I have that capacity, he already suffers so much that I just wanted him to have a happy ending this time.
Masterlist
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You were the new firefighter in 118, and also new to the city. In order to follow your dreams, you left your hometown with everyone and everything you knew. You craved for bigger things, you wanted the big city, you wanted Los Angeles.
The team welcomed you with open arms, which was unusual to you. You weren’t used to this or neither known by your affectionate gestures, but apparently everything was an excuse for a hug at the station. It was a bit hard to get used to all this affection, especially when you came from a place where you were always by yourself.
That was one of the main reasons you became a firefighter, you have walked through fire every single day of your life, why not make it your profession?
You were a source of curiosity between the team, always so quiet and so resistant to everyone's affection. It was hard to win you over. Especially because you had a rather difficult personality, you were fearless at work, you weren't afraid to go into the fire to save lives, you did it without thinking twice.
To Bobby you were a cause of concern, and sometimes the reason why he was having trouble sleeping. He knew this personality very well. It was the same one he had struggled for years to learn to deal with, the one he had to fight with so many times, he was very familiar with this death wish love, it was the same as Buck’s.
The blue-eyed man on the other side, couldn't understand why he couldn't take his eyes off you. Ever since you arrived a few months ago, your image has been running through Buck’s mind. You've become a challenge for him. But not in a bad way, he wanted to get to know you, he wanted to understand you. But you didn't make things any easier for him, especially when today was the first time he'd seen you laugh.
"You're drooling" he snapped back to reality when he heard Eddie mocking next to him.
"Shut up" Buck said, turning his gaze back to you playing with his niece.
You had a beauty he couldn't explain, an angelic one. You had this steely gaze and looking at you felt like suicide. He would fall to his knees if you asked him to. How could someone so delicate also be so dangerous?
The way you were reluctant to follow Bobby's orders, you'd walk into the fire without a second thought. You would take risks without thinking about your own safety, just thinking about everyone else. He saw how hard you worked, he saw how mad Bobby got when he ordered the building to be evacuated and you were always the last one to leave. You were intriguing and he was fascinated.
It was so strange for you. Being in Maddie's living room, with everyone gathered together like a big family, laughing and telling funny stories. The team met once a week, with all the families together, the children running around the living room, the smell of food in the air, the voices, the laughter.
You accepted the invitation after a few months of refusing, and now you spent the week looking forward to the moment when you would be together again.
Sometimes when you got home from a meeting, you cried. You cried because you never had that, you never had anyone who cared about you. You were an unexpected pregnancy, your parents didn't planned you, they didn't want you and that was never a secret to anyone.
And that's why you were surprised when one day you arrived early at the station and Hen had a cake for you that you had once said reminded of what your grandmother used to bake.
Or when another one Eddie handed you a drawing that Chris made specifically for you. Of the two of you playing together.
Or when Maddie sent you, through Chim, the cookies you said you loved one day while you were having coffee together.
Or when Bobby invited you to have lunch with him and Athena on a Sunday ‘cause he knew you were going to do it alone.
Or when Buck gave you a book he'd heard you say was your favorite during a conversation.
*
It was mid-afternoon on a Sunday. Your hands were shaking, your heart pounding. The words your father had once spoken echoed in your mind. "You will never be loved". But you were at a table with 118's entire family, and you felt loved. Maddie told you about the gossip from her work. Karen hugged you from the side every time you passed by her. Hen included you in every conversation. Athena calmly answered all the questions you were curious about her work. So why did you feel like an imposter? Why was your father's voice echoing inside your head? Why were you on the verge of an anxiety attack?
"I'll be right back" you muttered to the girls, but you realized how shaky your voice sounded. You were pathetic.
You barely made it to the bathroom, your legs buckled and you sat down in the corner of the room. You could hardly breathe, it was hard to pull in the air. Tears streamed down your face. Your heart was racing. Your hands were shaking.
You heard your voice being called from outside. Damn. You couldn't calm down, your hand was on your chest as if it could make the pain go away.
"Hey, hey. I'm here. Calm down, I’ve got you" it was Buck.
His voice was just a whisper in your ear. You let a sob escape your lips. Pathetic. You felt his arms around you, until you were all wrapped up in his arms. Why was he doing that? Why did he care?
He stayed there until you stopped crying. You were still in his arms, and it was so warm, so safe. Sighs came from your lips, and you couldn't imagine what a mess Buck's head and heart were in. He wanted you in his arms, not just now.
"I'm sorry," you whispered and tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let you, so you stayed.
"You don't have to talk about what's going on in there, but the day you feel like you need a hug to cry into, you've got mine" your eyes filled with tears again. "And don't ever apologize for it"
*
The smiles on your lips were becoming constant. And it was Buck's favorite image. You were letting people through your armor, you were letting your guard down, and it felt good. You now baked pies and cakes for the station on your days off, recipes learned from the girls after a few long afternoons of chatting and coffee.
Your laughter was contagious, and the boys would always crack little jokes to get them out of you.
Your eyes were now looking out for a pair of blue ones, all the time, everywhere. Eyes that were always looking back at you. Your hands were always looking for an excuse to bump into Buck's, just to feel that shiver run down your spine every time. And he would find any reason to text you, until the excuses became routine. You woke up every day with a good morning message and went to bed with a good night one. The little touches now became big gestures, Buck loved to brush your hair out of your face and tuck them behind your ear. And you loved to run your hand over the birthmark above his eye. You loved when his warm lips traveled up your neck to your lips. You loved when his hands ran over your body always so slowly and so gently, bringing goosebumps wherever they went. You loved making love with him. How he worshiped your body, how much he worshiped you. The way he made you feel loved.
You had a hold on Buck, and you didn't even know it. He had become attached to you, attached to the idea of having you by his side. The nights with you were the ones he could truly rest in, the mornings where he woke up to your soft kisses on his face, were the ones he would keep forever in his mind.
But he could feel that you were still resisting his feelings, and he was terrified of losing you. Buck was in love with you. It took months for him to realize that, but he did it. He loved you.
But one thing has never changed. And as Buck followed the loud murmurs coming from Bobby’s office, where he knew you were at, he kept in mind the danger you were in at every call. He couldn't lose you.
"Hey, what happe-" he couldn't finish the sentence when he saw you walking out the door, since you brushed past him, bumping into his shoulder, without even looking him in the face.
Buck made his way to the room, where he saw his captain wiping his hands across his face, letting out an exhausted sigh.
"She'll end up dead if she keep acting like this, Buck"
"I know"
"After the last call, if she doesn't change her behavior, I'll be forced to suspend her."
"I know."
Buck couldn't lose you.
You couldn't talk to Buck yet, you were so nervous after your conversation with Bobby. You were trying your best, how could he tell you that you had a death wish love? You were saving lives, and it didn't matter if it cost you your own. You didn't care.
A new call ecoed through the station. It was something big. A fire in a shed. People were working at the time, so there were many likely victims. You were anxious, just as you were before any call, but you were ready for it. You were born ready.
"Be careful," Buck told you before you got off the truck and you nodded. You were always careful "I love you"
You turned surprised to Buck, you'd never said that to each other before. It disconcerted you.
"Buck, I-"
Before you could say anything, you heard Bobby calling you to give instructions and you had to run.
I love you.
The words echoed in your head as you entered the burning building. No one had ever said that to you. You didn't even know the weight those words carried.
"Sir, follow this path and the fireman will take you to the exit."
It was so hot. You'd already lost count of how many people you'd pulled out of the line of fire. Your head was heavy. It was getting hard to breathe.
"Evacuate the building now," you could hear Cap saying over the radio. Everyone agreed and gave their location. You were about to respond when you heard something.
It was a call for help.
You could have sworn it was a call for help.
"Captain, I'm in the east side, I hear someone screaming for help. I'm close, I can get them out"
"Negative, the building will collapse at any moment. Get out immediately"
Your vision was blurred.
I love you.
You couldn't go out and leave those people to die, so you went ahead. The way to the door was difficult, there was a lot of rubble, and when you opened it, you froze in place.
It was empty. The fire danced in front of you, mocking you. But the cries for help... you've never been so wrong before.
I love you.
“It’s empty” you murmured at the radio.
Bobby was shouting your name from the other end of the radio. You turned around, but it was so hard to breathe. You tried to find your way back, but everything was spinning. Buck was now calling your name.
I love you.
His words were running through your head. Your steps were now slow. The way out, you couldn't find the way out. You could hear the fire laughing at you. Stupid. Pathetic. You heard an explosion behind you, and it threw you off balance, bringing you to the ground. You'd been walking through fire all your life, and now it would finally take its place back. Your siren buzzed in your ears. That would be the end of you.
I love you too, Buck.
The moment Buck came out of the building and didn't see you outside, he tried to go back. But hands held him in place.
This couldn't be happening. No, no.
Bobby called your name on the radio and you didn't answer. It's empty. That was the last answer they got. You weren't answering. An explosion. On the east side, where you were.
Buck's knees gave way, and he went down. All eyes were on the exit of the building waiting for you, waiting for a miracle. But it never came.
Buck screamed, and he would scream until his lungs gave up.
Time seemed to stop. Buck's screams were the only noise to be heard. And another explosion. Tears rolled down trough some faces. No one could believe it. This couldn't be happening.
Buck couldn't lose you like this.
"We found her" some voice echoed over the radio.
Buck's heart could stop any second now.
But the building was collapsing.
He broke free from his friends and ran into the building, dodging all the fallen and burnt obstacles, and he saw you. You were in the arms of a fireman. He ran up to you and carried you out of the building. As soon as you stepped onto the sidewalk, the building collapsed. Buck held you in his arms with all his strength and ran, feeling the debris fly past you.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" was the first thing that came out of your lips when he put you on the stretcher and he shut you up, pressing his lips to yours.
Buck analyzed each of your wounds alongside Hen and Chim and you could see the tears streaming down Buck's face, the ones that were also streaming down your own.
You were still struggling to breathe, every inch of your body ached, and you felt on the verge of losing consciousness. Until you succumbed to the darkness that was calling your name.
*
You woke up a few hours later in hospital. Your hands were being squeezed and you could feel something wet running down over them. Tears.
Buck had his face in your hands, he had never felt so afraid before. And when he heard your voice calling him, it was as if he could finally breathe.
"I'm sorry, Buck, I-I don't know what happened-"
"I almost lost you today"
Your heart broke into a million pieces. You did this to him, your recklessness, your impulsive behavior. It was your fault.
"I'm sorry"
Tears were now streaming down your face and he moved closer, running his hands gently down your cheeks.
"I was terrified of losing you. I'd die if I do."
"I would never leave you"
"Promise?"
"I love you, Buck. And I'll love you to death"
"Please don't let it be soon"
You smiled. No one had ever loved you like that.
"It won't."
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Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.



Chapter eight ⭐︎ Say my name and everything just stops
Warnings: 18+, minors don't interact! jealousy, angst, low self-esteem (kinda?), mentions of the upside down. weed and alcohol consumption. I will not spoiler anything here, so read with caution
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Summary: You blindly began to follow your feelings, hanging onto a hope that died just as quickly as it came.
Word count: 10k+
Author's note: @hellfire--cult and I came up with this whole idea and we kept talking about this moment for weeks and now its finally here, I hope you guys are gonna enjoy it as much as we did hehe
Series Masterlist ⭐︎ Previous Chapter ⭐︎ Next Chapter
♡
The spring wind blows through the open windows in your room, touching your skin and slightly lifting the ends of your new dress. The smell of vanilla and the floral scent of your perfume lingers in the air. You’re leaning closer to your mirror as you apply your favorite gloss to your lips.
A tingling, exciting feeling bubbles in your stomach, your heart jumping every few seconds or so at the thought of seeing him today.
Steve’s reactions were everything you were hoping for when you teased him at the diner and in his car, yesterday. His blushing cheeks and the wide, darkened eyes filled you with victory after you had placed a kiss upon his flushed skin. You are still not sure what had caused you the sudden rush of courage, but you’re glad that it hit you because the way he looked at you, the way he reacted, the way his breath hitched in his throat finally gave you the last push to do what you had always wanted to do. Today, you’re finally going to give in to your feelings.
The nervous, insecure part of you is telling you that there is still a big chance that he might reject you, that you will ruin this thing between you both by making the final move.
And usually that weak part of your mind would win, it would fill you with enough humiliating images to pull back, to make you rethink your decision, to keep you hiding in the shadows, the way you always did.
But you’re no longer letting it win.
You will do this, even if you might lose your dignity.
Placing the lip gloss back on your vanity, you reach for your favorite necklace, and put it on. You touch up your hair one last time, fixing your bangs before you take a step back, eying the red and white sundress, the little bows on the straps, the dainty flowers on the material, the shortness of it that exposes enough of your skin to drive him crazy… you hope.
‘Just make your move, babe. Do you really think King Steve would reject you?’
Your smile falls a little when Billy’s voice echoes in your mind.
Every memory of your best friend brings a hurtful pang to your heart.
He was the only one who knew about your feelings for Steve and surprisingly he kept encouraging you to ask him out, to make your move.
Would he be proud of you now?
Or would he still make fun of you for liking someone like Steve?
You step away from the mirror and walk over to the window, closing it before you leave your room and make your way downstairs. Eddie isn’t picking you up for once, even though he called you three times already, asking if he should come pick you up and if you’re truly feeling good enough to drive yourself again – you are. The headaches are gone, the dizziness is gone too. All that is left are the nightmares and the sudden rushes of anxiety but you are okay, you feel okay.
You walk over to the dresser in your hallway, reaching inside the key bowl to retrieve your car keys when something else catches your eye. The one single key, lying in there, you reach for it, furrowing your brows as you trace your finger along the metal, letting it fall in your palm.
You still remember the day when Max had showed up at your house, asking for you to take Billy’s car before Neil would destroy it in a moment of rage.
‘He’d want you to have it anyway.’ She said as she handed you the keys.
You remember how you broke down crying the moment you got into the driver's seat. You missed your best friend and it felt so wrong to sit in the place that once belonged to him.
You got the windshield fixed and anything else that needed to be repaired, before you parked it in your garage, planning to never open the gate again and just leave the car there until Max would ask for it back. And, you did leave it there, for a few weeks at least.
Your car broke down on a hot Friday afternoon and the mechanic at the local shop told you that it would take a few weeks to get it fixed. You walked and used the bus for a few days, and then the rain and the storms crashed upon Hawkins, giving you no choice but to take the blue Camaro.
Max even joked about it, she told you that it was Billy who caused your car to break down and who somehow let it rain and storm over the town so you would finally take his beloved car out for a ride because it’s just too pretty to be hidden and locked away in a dark, cold garage.
You’d sometimes drive around at night, when the streets were empty and no one was around.
When you visited your sister in Indianapolis, you took his car.
But now it’s been a while, the last time you sat behind that steering wheel was right before the apocalypse almost hit the town.
A sigh falls from your lips as you stare at the key.
“Not today,” you murmur as you place it back where it laid before and reach for your keys.
The drive to Eddie’s new place isn’t a long one, he only lives a few streets away from you now, it would only be a ten minute walk but you desperately waited for the moment when you could finally drive again, and you didn’t want to pass up on the opportunity today.
You missed this, sitting behind the steering wheel, instead of the passenger seat, longing to be the one in control. You missed picking the music yourself – not that Eddie’s music taste is a bad one, you just need a mix of everything, not just rock and heavy metal, sometimes you just need a girly pop song – not that you would ever admit it to him.
When you arrive at your destination and you pull up to Eddie’s driveway, you notice that Steve’s car isn’t there yet. Only Jonathan’s car is parked next to Eddie’s Impala.
Steve is never late, yesterday being the first time that he was the last one to arrive, so he is either still waiting for Robin or… running late is his new thing.
“There she is!” Eddie chuckles as opens the front door at the same time as you get out of your car, “and she’s here in one piece!”
A laugh tumbles from your lips as you close the door and lock your car before you make your way over to him, eying the new shirt he’s wearing – which is just another band tee that you have never heard of before. His curly hair up in a bun and a can of beer in his hand.
“I’m a good driver, what are you talking about, Eds?”
He furrows his brows, lips curling into an amused smile, “are you?”
You walk up the steps to his porch, greeting him with an eye roll, “you know what, next time I’ll pick you up.”
He smirks, using his index finger to point at your car.
“What, with your baby Mustang over there?”
You squint your eyes at him, “nope, I’ll take the hidden gem in my garage.”
“Wait what… What hidden gem?”
“You’ll find out,” you wink at him, trying to brush past him when he stops you, placing his hand on your arm, he pulls you back softly.
“Wait.”
You raise your brows at him, “yes?”
He’s got the twinkle in his eyes, the one he always has when he’s happy about something. His lip twitches, pale cheeks slowly changing color, he’s barely able to contain his excitement as he bounces on his feet.
“Guess who scored a date?”
Your eyes widen, lips parting as you remember the pretty waitress from the diner.
Eddie is blushing, lips now curling into a full smile.
“Oh my god, really?” You ask as a grin appears on your face.
“Yeah! I’m gonna take her out tomorrow night, I can’t fucking wait, sweets.” He says with a dreamy look in his eyes. “She was so sweet a-and fuck… she’s gorgeous, don’t know how she said yes to me.”
You frown at him, reaching your hand out to pinch his cheek, “you’re a handsome, sweet boy, Edward, now shush. You’re gonna knock her off her feet. Any girl would be lucky to have you.”
His eyes soften, he rubs the back of his neck before his fingers trace the scar on the side – you know that it’s now an insecurity of his, just like it is one of yours. Scars litter your skin from where a bat had left a gnarly wound on the back of your shoulder, from where Jason had hurt you, from where he had left reminders for you that he was the one who did this to you.
But your scars aren’t nearly half as bad as all the ones on his skin.
“I’ve never been on a date before,” he murmurs, eyes flashing with doubt.
“So? It’s gonna be even more special then,” you shrug.
“I just don’t wanna mess it up.”
“You won’t,” you smile at him, “you’ve got that special charm, one that makes others like you right away, you’re funny and you’re sweet, now stop doubting yourself or I’ll kick your ass and hunt down every asshole who ever made you feel otherwise.”
He chuckles at your words, though his eyes are still soft as he looks at you. He doesn’t doubt you, he knows that you would actually hunt down every name on the list of people who hurt him.
“Got it?”
“Got it.”
“Good,” you say, sternly.
“Good,” he nods.
You stare at each other for a moment before you both burst into giggles. He wraps his arm around your shoulder and he pulls you inside his house, narrowing his eyes as he takes in your dress.
“Who’d you dress up for, sweets?” He asks, “there’s no hot guys here.”
“Well, aren’t you humble?”
“No hot guys besides me, of course,” he corrects himself after clearing his throat, smirking at you.
You only shake your head in response.
You pass by the kitchen and the big shelf that was specifically customized for Wayne’s mug collection. Vinyls are on the walls in the long hallway that leads to the living room where you hear the chatter of your friends and the faint music that sounds through the house.
The smell of weed already lingering in the air.
The sound of Nancy’s giggle, followed by a voice you hadn’t heard in a while makes you furrow your brows.
“Argyle is back?”
Your surprised voice along with the wide eyes you look at him with make him chuckle. He knew you weren’t paying attention when he told you about it days back. You were too distracted by whatever daydream you were stuck in as he let both you and Steve know that Argyle was coming back to spend the summer in Hawkins before going off to college in September – something that Eddie definitely won’t be doing, he won’t be going to college, he won’t be going anywhere, at least not now, not yet, maybe not ever, even though it’s all he ever wanted.
He walked the stupid stage, he snatched his diploma and he finally flipped Higgins the bird, despite the glares, despite the whispers of the people who still blamed him for what had happened weeks back but it doesn’t matter, he tells himself. It doesn’t matter what they say or think because he got people who believed him, people who care about him, people who were willing to fight for him, people who are worth staying for.
“Yeah, he’s here the whole summer.”
“Ooh, means we’re gonna get high a lot, cool,” you giggle.
“Like we don’t do that all that time,” Eddie rolls his eyes, though a smile tugs at his lips as he pushes towards the living room, your feet carrying you closer and closer to your friends.
Despite Steve not being here yet, you already feel the rush of excitement mixed with the nervousness of what you plan on doing, flushing through your veins.
Your eyes first fall on Jonathan and Nancy who are standing by the door that leads out into Eddie’s backyard, his arm wrapped around her shoulder, a smile tugging at her lips when she sees you.
“Hi!” She waves at you, a friendly look on her face.
“Hey,” you smile at her before you look over at her boyfriend, greeting him as well. You then turn your head to your right, your smile widening when your eyes meet Argyle’s already very dazed ones.
He stands up from his seat on the couch, his hair falling in front of his face a little, he opens his arms, revealing his Bob Marley shirt to you.
“Well look at what the cat dragged in,” he jokes as he steps towards you, “come here, chica.”
You chuckle, leaving Eddie’s side to greet Argyle, who instantly pulls you into a tight hug. The smell of weed enveloping you, right away.
“I didn’t know you’d be back so soon!”
“So soon?” He slurs, patting your head when you pull back again, chuckling when you swat his hand away. “You didn’t miss me?” He jokes as he wraps his arm around your shoulder, just the way Eddie did before, he pulls something out of his pocket, handing it to you, “here, got you a little gift from California.”
Your eyes lighten up in amusement, a smile tugging at your lips as you look at the blunt he’s holding, you take it, holding it up as you look up at him with a grin, “why thanks.”
“You gotta share that one with me,” Jonathan grins at you, lazily.
“You’ve had enough already,” Nancy rolls her eyes, though not without a smile on her lips. She pats his chest, “come on, let’s go outside.”
“Yeah, you guys go ahead, I’m gonna grab some more drinks,” Eddie says before he leaves the living room.
You all step out into the backyard, walking over to the little fire pit where the flames are already glowing, surrounded by the comfortable seats. The sound of water flowing from the stream filling the air with a fresh scent, the smell of flowers and the trees giving you a sense of peace.
Eddie’s backyard is comforting and nice, despite being close to the forest, it’s making you feel safe. He wouldn’t have this now if he hadn’t been dragged into a world of darkness – unlike you, he didn’t grow up in wealth, he didn’t have a fancy house, a fancy backyard with a pool. No. Eddie grew up in a lonesome house, one that certainly wasn’t as luxurious as yours or the one he lives in now. The house he grew up in was haunted by painful memories of his mother that he lost at a way too young age and his father who came and went as he pleased, it was the only thing that he had, the only thing he called his own, but that was taken from him too and he had no choice but to move in with his Uncle Wayne, who had done everything to give him a home – and now, Eddie gave him that back, he gave Wayne a home, a nice house with a nice roof over his head, a garden that he always wanted to have. Eddie had tried to keep the upside down a secret, he didn’t want to talk about what was out there, he didn’t want to worry him, he didn’t want to tell him where all the money actually came from but Wayne isn’t stupid and Eddie isn’t exactly the best at keeping secrets from the people he loves and cares about.
You wonder what you would have told your parents if they were still here – would you have told them the truth about what actually happened at the Creel house? Or would you have kept it all a secret? You are certainly much better at keeping secrets hidden. Eddie couldn’t even look Wayne in the eyes when he told him that the bite marks on his skin came from a rabid dog and not from interdimensional bats.
Something cold touches your shoulder, making you flinch in surprise. You tilt your head up, meeting the eyes of your best friend again, “where’s your head at, sweets?” He chuckles, holding the can of diet pepsi out to you.
With furrowed brows, you look down at the drink and reach for it, “thanks,” you murmur, “and uh, nowhere. I’m just fascinated by your backyard.”
His dimples show when a laugh escapes him, he takes a seat beside you, snatching away the blunt from your lap, he places it between his lips and uses his red lighter to light it up. He lets out a content sigh as he leans back, puffing out the smoke into the sky before he takes a look around, “it’s nice isn’t it?”
You nod, pulling the tab on your pepsi, it opens with a pop.
“It’s better than mine.”
He turns his head to look at you, a bewildered look on his face, “you’re crazy, sweets. You got a pool.”
“You got one too!” You chuckle, pointing to the pool that has yet to be used, it’s warm out, not hot yet.
“Yeah, well yours is fucking huge, and you got a hot tub too!”
“You got a hot tub, chica?” Argyle gasps from your right, “oh, you’re rich rich.”
“Correction, my parents were rich.”
“Correction, we’re all rich now,” Jonathan adds, pointing at you with a dazed smile.
“Rich isn’t exactly the term I would use,” Nancy mumbles as she takes a sip of her soda.
“Then what term would you use, Wheeler?” Eddie asks, shaking his head at her, “enlighten us.”
Nancy clears her throat, placing her elbow on the wooden armrest, “we’re taken care of.”
Jonathan snorts, putting his hand on her thigh as he gives her an amused smile, while she already rolls her eyes at whatever is about to leave his mouth – there’s no annoyance behind her eyes though, no tension in her body from where he touched her, unlike with Steve, who she always looked tense and irritated with. Back then you didn’t understand why, there were so many questions in your mind when you watched them and when she left him – how could anyone be irritated with Steve? How could anyone be tense with someone that provides so much love and warmth to the people he so deeply cares about? How could she leave him? How could she break his heart? Who could ever hurt Steve Harrington?
“Just admit it, we’re rich.”
A groan echoes through the backyard, one that doesn’t belong to Eddie, Nancy or anyone else sitting in the circle. You all turn your heads towards the house, finding a very annoyed Robin making her way over to you, a six pack of beers in her hand, sunglasses perched on her nose even though the sun is starting to go down already.
Eddie isn’t surprised at her barging into his home, she does it all the time, to him, to you, to Steve, he doesn’t mind it though.
You straighten your back, holding your drink tighter as you look away from her, waiting for Steve to walk through the door.
The feelings inside of you start to rise again, your heart picking up the pace as your skin starts burning from the excitement.
Robin plops down in the seat next to Eddie, placing the beers on the ground as she slumps back, sighing loudly.
Everyone’s watching her, expecting a rant already but you’re still fixated on the door, waiting for him.
“Buckley, why so angry?”
She pulls her sunglasses up into her hair, turning to face him, “I’m glad you asked,” she murmurs as she reaches for one of the beers, “Dingus ditched me, so I had to walk all the way here!” She throws her arms up dramatically.
You furrow your brows at her words, the burning on your skin beginning to die down just as fast as it came.
Argyle and Jonathan chuckle at her.
“You live 3 blocks away from here…” Nancy mumbles.
“Not the point, Nance,” she argues, glaring at her friend.
“Wait, so Steve isn’t coming?” Jonathan slurs.
Your eyes are wide and hopeful, your hand clutching the can tighter as you dig your feet into the grass beneath you, a weird feeling settling in the pit of your stomach.
“Wetting his dick with Heidi seems more fucking important today,” she grumbles, rolling her eyes as she raises the beer to her lips.
Your heart drops.
The burning in your skin disappears completely as the fire is replaced by ice, the coldness of it freezing your whole body, stopping your heart and taking the false hope away as it kills every feeling that had taken home inside of you just seconds ago.
Your eyes are stuck on her like you’re waiting, waiting for her to laugh and say it was a joke, that he will be here soon, that he isn’t out with some other girl after what happened between you and him yesterday.
“Whoa, what?” Eddie mumbles, holding his hands up, “so… he’s on a date with the girl he didn’t want to keep seeing?”
“Yep.”
Every ounce of excitement is now replaced by the sickness in your stomach, the lump in your throat that makes you struggle to breathe.
What were you thinking?
That the game you played wasn't just a game to him? That it was something more than that? That he wanted you just the way you always wanted him? That he could ever feel something for you?
You don’t know whether you want to laugh at yourself or cry.
How saddening it is to long for someone who was forced to like you.
While you were getting ready, making yourself look pretty for him, thinking that he might like you in this dress – he was getting ready to take out another girl, a girl that he chose to like.
You slowly slump back in your seat when Eddie’s laughter pulls you back into reality. You blink, masking the shocked, pained look on your face with a relaxed one as you take a sip of your drink, hoping that it will get rid of the lump sitting in your throat – it doesn’t. Nothing does.
Your friends move on to another topic, while you stay there, where you will stay for a while now. The pain of the rejection that has never even taken place, slowly sinking in and everything around you begins to suffocate you – the dress you are wearing, the necklace around your neck, even the presence of your friends.
You don’t want to be here any longer, you need to be alone.
But you can’t go, not now, not yet.
It would be too soon, too obvious and they can’t know, no one can know about your feelings for Steve, about how much it hurts to feel that way for him.
So you hide the pain as best as you can, you nod along to your friends' conversation, you speak and you laugh when you have to, even when everything inside of you wants you to cry both out of sadness and anger.
You’re not even angry at him, you couldn’t be angry at him even if you tried to be. He doesn’t know about your feelings – if he did, he wouldn’t have filled you with false hope, you know he wouldn’t.
He wouldn’t string you along, you know he’s not the type of person to do something like that, not even to you. But you really thought that you had something, that there was something between you, that’s why you let your walls crumble, that’s why you started acting upon your feelings, that’s why you were ready to do more than just the subtle touches and the flirtations.
You wait, you wait for the right moment to leave, when everyone is distracted enough, you get up, after whispering an apology, a lie into Eddie’s ear, knowing that he doesn’t believe you, that he will probably call you later or even show up to check on you. But he lets you go.
And as you leave your friends, making your way back into the house, their laughter echoes in your ears, their happy voices and the cheerfulness they’re all feeling, that you were supposed to feel too.
You blink back the tears, not wanting them to fall just yet.
You make your way back to your car, not wasting a second to start it and drive home, your vision blurred and your throat hurting from how much you want to cry.
How foolish it was of you to think that you could ever stand a chance – there was never one to begin with. You will always be the one in the shadows, the one to secretly watch him, the one to secretly want him, the one with the jealousy and the heartache, the one wishing to be anyone but herself because maybe then, he would want you too.
The smell of smoke from the campfire is now lingering on your clothes and in your hair, tears are now falling freely, ruining the makeup that you have spent hours on, the makeup that you can’t wait to wash off now.
You don’t even want to think about him.
You don’t want to ask yourself what he’s doing now.
He touched you so softly, so subtly, and yet it did everything to set your insides on fire, to make you feel special, even if only for a short moment.
Now he is touching someone else, in far more special ways.
A frustrated sigh falls from your lips when you step inside your home, it’s cold and empty, something that you have felt like for a very long time until he started the fire inside of you, only to make it die again… and all without his knowledge.
You walk up the stairs and past your room, going straight into the bathroom, feeling the need to wash away the day, as though it could ease the aching in your chest. You start the shower before you turn to the sink, not even bothering to look at your reflection in the mirror, it would only make you feel more pathetic.
You can feel the hot tears rolling down your cheeks, the quivering in your bottom lip.
You hate this, you hate the sadness that you shouldn’t be feeling in the first place.
You got no reason to be sad, you should have put your feelings aside, knowing that nothing would ever come out of it.
It was all so obvious, it was just teasing, nothing more, nothing less. Nothing ever happened, so why would it happen now? He just found another way of messing with you, so that you two wouldn’t go at each other's throats like before.
You just have to go back. No more teasing like this. No more letting yourself get sucked into delusions. He is just having fun while you crave something more with him and get hopeful.
You aren’t having fun. You wanted more.
You have no choice but to go back to how you were before this… thing started.
Once your makeup is off and your dress is now laying on the bathroom floor, you step inside the shower, letting the warmth envelope you, hoping for a sense of comfort from it.
Standing there for a moment, you let the water rain upon your skin, matching the pace of your tears that you’re willing away.
You will hunt Billy in the afterlife for making you believe that King Steve could ever want you.
You use your scented shampoo, hoping that it will get rid of the smell of smoke in your hair. You love campfire’s but you can’t stand the stench it leaves on your clothes and your hair.
Your hands run over your smooth skin as you wash your body, reminding you of the fact that you even shaved this morning – you couldn’t feel more stupid than you do right now.
Despite the loudness of your own voice cursing at you inwardly and the water hitting the glass, you hear the sound of your doorbell going off – multiple times.
“What the fuck,” you murmur in confusion.
It keeps ringing again and again – once, twice and it stops after a third time before it turns into rapid knocking.
You know it isn’t Eddie, he wouldn’t even have the patience to ring your doorbell and wait for you to open, he’d just barge right in.
You’d choose to ignore it if the person outside wasn’t so goddamn persistent.
You turn off the shower, squeezing the water from your hair before you get out, and wrap a towel around your body. The mirror is fogged, as the rest of the room is, you open the door and step out into the hallway, that now feels colder than before.
The knocking continues, filling you with anger.
Who shows up at night, knocking like a mad man?
Maybe you shouldn’t make your way downstairs now, maybe you shouldn’t open the door to whoever it is on the other side. It could be anyone or anything but you doubt that Vecna came back from the dead to knock on doors now and hunt you of all people – he could have done that weeks back, you went through enough trauma, he could have easily chosen you but even he didn’t want you.
You rip open the door, ready to curse and yell at whoever is terrorizing you at this hour but every word gets caught in your throat and even your breathing halts for a second as your glassy eyes meet the hazel ones that you have been missing all day. Frustration and anger swirling inside them, blazing fire raging behind his eyes. His cheeks are slightly flushed, his chest rising up and down heavily as he stands on your porch, looking better than ever.
“Steve?” His name tumbles out of your mouth before you can stop it as you stare at him in confusion.
He eyes you up and down, taking in the sight of your exposed skin that is still dripping with water before he clenches his jaw, raising his hand to run his fingers through his hair, tugging at it.
Steve Harrington is fucked. He is utterly fucked. You have cursed him in every way possible, he can’t get you out of his mind, he can’t get you out of his system and the thought that you were only playing with him drove him insane. His hunger for you made him desperate, desperate for release.
So in his state of frustration and desperation, he called up Heidi, thinking that a date and sex with a girl he had been with before would help him move on and stop thinking about you but who was he fooling. He couldn’t even kiss her when she leaned in to greet him with her lips, he dodged her. He couldn’t even listen to the things she was telling him after they ordered their drinks. He couldn’t care less about her. All he could think about was you. All he wanted was you. He wanted your lips to kiss him, he wanted your hands to touch him, he wanted your body under his and the more he thought about it, the more he stopped caring about a possible humiliation after he’d finally make a move on you, he needed you, and he needed to try – if you’d reject him, then so be it, at least he would know and not live with the what if’s in his head.
He canceled the date in the middle of it, not caring about how messed up that was. He drove her home and without a second thought, he drove here, he came to you.
And now, you’re standing in front of him, in nothing but a towel, water rolling down your soft skin, big eyes filled with confusion, lips parted, lips that he wants to kiss until he grows breathless.
The sight in front of him does little to make any of this easier for him. You look like you’ve just walked out of one the dreams he had about you.
“You gotta be kidding me,” he murmurs under his breath, surprising you when he invites himself into your home, brushing past you with an intensity that almost knocks you off your feet.
You blink, turning around abruptly, a bewildered look replacing your confused one.
As you take in the sight of him, your sadness begins to dissolve as the anger you started to miss floods through your veins the longer you look at him.
You slam the door shut when the wind causes goosebumps to rise on your skin, you hold the towel tighter against your body as you glare at him, “what the fuck?”
“I have to be the one to say that!” He argues.
“Excuse me?” You scoff, your face now burning with rage. Every second that passes now makes you forget about the tears you just shed over him, irritation sparking inside of you so wildly that you want nothing more than to kick him out of your house for behaving that way towards you for no reason. “Weren’t you on a date with… Heidi?”
Steve clenches his jaw at the mocking voice, at the smirk now tugging on your lips. He chuckles, though not in amusement, he points a finger at you, “see, that’s what I’m fucking talking about!”
Your brows knit together at his outburst, the fire in his eyes growing stronger and bigger.
“Harrington, if you came to yell nonesense at me, just fucking leave!” You roll your eyes and turn away from him, making your way back towards the stairs.
But his scoff stops you.
“Oh, so you keep running away huh!? Didn’t you already get over that!?”
You turn around with nothing but anger boiling inside of you, “running away!? From what!?”
This should have been enough to make him turn around and leave, because clearly nothing changed, clearly this is still just a game to you – but he has hope, and he is desperate enough to throw every bit of his dignity away and risk something.
“Oh, don’t play fucking dumb right now. Acting like that for two weeks and pretending to be stupid is not a good look on you, Blondie.”
You take in a sharp breath, digging your fingers into your towel as you frown at him.
What does he want from you?
Why did he come here?
Was the date so bad, was the sex so awful that he had to come here to torture you?
Without another word, you turn around and you stomp up the stairs, not wanting to see him, not wanting to hear his voice anymore.
Your heart starts pounding in your chest again, and you can’t help but wonder – did he figure you out? Did he figure out your feelings? Is that why he is here? To confront you about them? To reject you?
You feel more and more stupid about what you had wanted to do when you woke up this morning.
Just when your feet carry you up to the second floor, and you rush across the hallway to walk into your room, his footsteps echo behind you, making you more irritated than before. You turn around to face him, but before you can even say anything, Steve is suddenly right in front of you, and his hands reach out to grab your waist, he pushes you against the wall behind you, gently, careful not to hurt you.
The gasp that falls from your lips startles you. His hands that touch the only thing that covers your body leaving your skin on fire. Your heart rate picks up so rapidly that it nearly steals your breath away. You look up into his golden brown orbs, the ones that are nearly black as he steps even closer, invading your space completely, making you breathe in the scent of his cologne, the one that has butterflies swirling in your stomach.
He catches you off guard completely.
You feel so vulnerable, so exposed as you stand there, caged in by his arms, his breath on your skin, his eyes that are filled with so much hunger.
The words die on your tongue, and yet, after you breathe in more of his scent, you open your mouth to speak.
“Shut up, Blondie… Just shut up for a second,” he murmurs, interrupting whatever words you had prepared to lie to him with.
His right hand leaves your waist, inching closer to your stomach as his fingers trace the hem of your towel, drool already forming in his mouth at the sight of you, he is ready to take you, ready to devour you and make you scream his name before he fucks you for only this time.
He notices the way your chest is moving, the way your breathing stutters.
“W-What are you doing, perv?” You stutter as you watch him play with the opening of your towel.
He can’t help but laugh, shaking his head at your insult.
“Perv? Are you going to continue to play fucking dumb?”
“Dumb? You are the dumb one if you think that I’m going to be the one to break into your teasing.”
Steve’s eyes flash with satisfaction.
This is what he wanted – to hear you admit that you were playing that game with him after all and not because you were playing him and stringing him along just to turn him down to gain something from it, whatever it might be. No. You were doing just what he was hoping for, all along.
You want him just as much as he wants you and that’s all he needs to know.
You roll your eyes at him, turning your head as you try to push your way out of his grasp but before you can even step away from him, his hands stop you but not on your waist this time. His large hands cup your cheeks, making you freeze. You stare at him wide eyed when he brings you closer, and you can’t even react before his whole body is suddenly pressed against yours, your heartbeat lurches into your throat.
As though his touch wasn’t shocking enough, his next move almost causes you to collapse, because now it isn’t only his body against yours, his hands on your cheeks or his breath on your skin, now it’s his lips… his lips on yours, his lips moving against yours in desperation as he takes every last of your breath and makes it his own.
You can’t do anything, you can’t move, you can’t breathe, you can’t even blink as you stare at him – how his eyes are closed and his cheeks are flushed, the furrowed brows as he kisses you with a kind of passion no one has ever kissed you with before.
Steve is kissing you.
Steve Harrington is kissing you.
His lips are moving roughly against yours, his hands holding your cheeks so softly, yet with an intensity.
This is all you ever wanted, to feel his touch and his lips on yours but you are too stunned to move, too surprised to kiss him back right now, too distracted wondering if this is real or not.
Along with the shock, you feel the slightest bit of insecurity flooding through you because even though he is kissing you, you can’t help but wonder why. Why isn’t he with Heidi? Why isn’t he kissing her right now? Did she turn him down? Did he come here because he just needed someone? Because he knew that you would fall for this? Or is this just another way for him to tease you?
Those questions prompt you to push him away, forcing him to break the kiss that he was so deeply lost in.
You notice the way he begrudgingly pulls away, the way he seems so drawn to your lips, the way his brows furrow in confusion now, his face is flushed and his pupils dilated as he looks at you with nothing but desperation in his eyes – he isn’t teasing, he wants you, he wants you right now and isn’t that all that matters? That he wants you?
His eyes stare into yours as he is breathing heavily. A flash of rejection takes over his features and by the look in his eyes, you can tell that he is beginning to get lost in his anxious thoughts – thoughts that you quickly shut down by making the move that he just made. You cup his cheeks and you pull him down, closing your eyes as you slam your lips against his for the very first time.
Unlike you, he wastes no second to reciprocate the kiss, a sigh of content leaving him as he presses you back against the wall.
Warmth blooms in your stomach, one that doesn’t stay the same temperature for long because the moment he deepens the kiss, the moment his hands hold you tighter and his knee parts your legs, sliding his thigh in between yours as the kiss gets rougher and rougher, you feel the warmth evolving into a deeper, burning sensation – a fire inside of you that only he can mend.
You can’t believe that this is happening, that something that you had been craving for years is now here.
And Steve, he feels his heart pounding in his chest from the rush, from the adrenaline, from his desperation that grows bigger and stronger when he feels just how much you want him as your lips move roughly with his.
You're hesitant with your touch, but when he grabs your face and pulls you even tighter against his body, his thigh pressing stronger against your core, you can’t help but throw your arms around his neck, digging your fingers into the hair that you’ve always wanted to touch.
You can feel him smirking against your lips when you moan into the kiss, which prompts you to tug at his hair and press your tongue against his bottom lip.
He welcomes it into his mouth so eagerly, his tongue now clashing against yours as his palms slide down to your waist while your hands reach for the front of his shirt, fisting the material tightly as you begin to drag him into your room.
You both know, you both feel where this is going, what this is leading to – what the past few weeks have been leading to.
You want this, you need this, you need him, even if just for tonight.
And you know, you already know that you will be done for, that he will ruin you for anyone else but you couldn’t care less, right now. Especially when he kisses you with so much roughness, everything about this setting all your insides on fire, leaving your skin burning and yet aching for more.
Steve is careful not to step on your bare feet as you lead him backwards into a different room. Excitement bubbles in his stomach and he grows even more breathless than before, he pulls away and breaks the kiss but doesn’t hesitate to latch his lips onto your neck, kissing and biting your flesh, “I fucking hate you, Blondie. I hate that I want you so much.”
Your lashes flutter as you close your eyes, tilting your head to the side as you feel your stomach and your heart fluttering at his touch, at his lips on your skin but especially at his words.
Your knees grow weak and a needy whimper falls from your puffy lips.
All that echoes in your mind now is I want you. I want you. I want you.
You don’t even care about the other things he said to you, you only care about the three little words you have only ever dreamt of before.
You almost fall when you feel the back of your legs hitting your bed, but he keeps you upright, not pushing you down just yet. He keeps nibbling on your neck, kissing, biting, sucking as he breathes heavily against you, growing harder against your stomach.
“Couldn’t even finish the fucking date, couldn’t do anything cause I kept thinking about you, Blondie,” he speaks into your neck, fingers now dangerously close to your bare skin behind the towel.
Your heart nearly explodes at his words and you can’t help but sigh in relief, knowing that nothing happened between him and Heidi. And all because of you.
“You drive me fucking crazy, I want to rip the towel right off–”
“Then do!” You whine, not caring about how eager and desperate you sound, “show me how much you hate me, Stevie.”
He pulls away from your neck after placing another wet kiss to your skin, strands of your hair getting caught in his as he faces you again, with flushed cheeks and almost black eyes he looks at you and takes in the sight of you, the pout on your lips, the flustered look on your face, big eyes that you are begging him with.
He doesn’t even bother to look around the room, just caring about the bed behind you.
He rips the towel off your body, letting it fall to the ground, his hands find your bare waist that he grips tightly as he throws you on the bed, smirking at the gasp that leaves your lips again.
Without hesitating to, he reaches for the hem of his shirt and rips it off.
Just like back then on the boat, when he took his shirt off before he jumped into the water, you stare at his chest, almost drooling at the delicious sight in front of you. His broad shoulders, the scar around his neck that makes him look even hotter, the hairs on his chest, the muscles in his arms that have visibly gotten bigger since high school. You bite your lip as your eyes move down, almost whining when you see the bulge in his tight jeans.
You wish you could run your finger down his chest and his stomach, tracing every little scar that the bats have left behind, but instead, you push yourself up, blushing at the fact that you are completely bare in front of him. You reach for his belt, fingers beginning to fumble with the metal when he stops you with a simple touch and a headshake.
“None of that,” he murmurs as he leans over, his hands digging between your ass and the mattress as he suddenly pulls you to the edge of the bed, dropping to his knees before you, he throws your legs over his shoulder and looks up at you with hooded eyes, “I need to hear you first.”
You nearly combust when you feel his breath on your pussy and his lips on your inner thighs. A whimper falling from your mouth as you try to close your legs out of instinct, blushing even harder than before.
“You’re fucking soaked,” he smirks, holding your thighs open as he teasingly slips a finger through your folds, “all for me, huh?”
You don’t answer but you don’t need to, the loud moan that you let out when he dives right into you with his tongue, gives him everything he needs to know.
He moans in content as he grabs your ass roughly, eyes rolling back when he tastes you for the first time, he almost starts drooling over you, finding pleasure in this.
He teasingly licks a stripe up from your entrance to your clit, circling the tip of his tongue around your already aching nub as he uses his fingers to part your lips.
You scrunch up your face as his tongue pleases you in ways your fingers never could, sighs and whimpers start escaping you as he now presses his thumb against your clit and he starts eating you out, his moans vibrating against you.
Your mouth falls open as your back arches in pleasure, fingers digging into the sheets beneath you as you fall apart completely.
No words are spoken as you both just enjoy this moment of bliss, him getting lost in you, you getting lost in the pleasure he blesses you with.
You focus on everything and also on nothing – his whimpers send shivers through you, his tongue that he fucks you with making you gasp and drool, and despite the heaviness in your eyes, you manage to open them, wanting, needing to see him.
He eats you out slowly, yet desperately, fingers and tongue now working together to unravel you. His eyes are closed and he keeps moaning and whimpering as saliva runs down his chin. He looks so content, so pleased from only this.
Steve curls his fingers inside of you as he keeps his thumb on your clit, rubbing circles on it.
Tears of pleasure prickle in your eyes as needy sounds keep escaping you. You hold the sheets even tighter now, closing your legs around his head, caging him in between them.
Steve finally opens his eyes, they darken even more now when he sees how you are falling apart for him, it only prompts him to fuck you even harder with his tongue and his two fingers.
Your moans and whimpers are enough to drive him crazy, enough to make the erection in his pants feel painful but he wants more, he needs to hear his name falling from your lips and he gets what he wants only seconds later when your body grows tense and your back arches again as a tear rolls down your cheek.
“Steve!” You nearly scream as you come undone, writhing beneath his touch.
You tilt your head to the side, bringing your hand up to your face, you bite your teeth into your knuckles as hot tears run down your flushed cheeks.
Steve laps at your pussy, moans still falling from his mouth. Only as you whimper weakly does he pull away from you, but not without giving your clit another teasing lick, causing you to spasm which only makes him chuckle darkly.
He carefully removes your legs from his shoulders and lets go of you before he rises back to his full height.
You instantly press your legs together, breathing heavily as you try to calm down from the orgasm he just gave you.
What Steve didn’t do before was take in the sight of your bare body, and now as he does it, he has to swallow harshly, his dick twitching in his jeans, begging for release. He finds himself aching for you, even more than before, he not only wants you, he needs you in ways he can’t even describe.
He watches the way your chest glistens with sweat, your nipples hard from the pleasure that curses through your body, your eyes are shut, your brows pulled together. He licks his lips before he bites down as his eyes trace every inch of your skin, the scars that make you look even more attractive.
It takes everything in him not to drop to his knees and taste you once again.
He needs you, he needs to feel you wrapped around his dick, he needs to hear your moans as he fills you to the brim, he needs to fuck you.
Steve unbuckles his belt, the metal clinking against each other, causing you to open your eyes at the sound.
You look at him through your glassy eyes, pushing yourself up on your elbows as you watch him unbutton his pants but before he pushes them down, he reaches for his wallet in his back pocket and you watch him curiously.
He opens it to take out the condom he had prepared for a different… less exciting occasion. He hastily pushes his pants and boxers down, his dick slaps against his stomach and he fails to notice the way your eyes widen or the way your lips part in surprise at the sight, at the size of him. He steps out of his shoes, cursing under his breath as he pushes them aside before he uses both hands to part your legs, getting on the mattress.
Before he rips the foil apart, he looks into your eyes, wanting your consent first but no words have to leave his mouth because you are the first to make the move, you sit up slightly, taking the tiny foil pack from his fingers, surprising him by bringing it up to your lips and ripping it open with your teeth.
Despite the streaks of tears on your skin, the fucked out look in your eyes, the shakiness in your body, you look at him so dangerously.
And he can’t do anything but watch you in awe for a moment, how you wrap your much smaller hand around his dick, pressing your thumb against his slit to tease him.
“O-Oh fuck…” He shudders, eyes nearly closing at only that.
You bite your bottom lip, trying not to drool as you roll the condom over his length. You look up at him again to find him staring at you with flushed cheeks and lust in his eyes. It’s dark in the room, but you can see each other just well enough, the moon shines brightly into your room tonight.
You can’t even help yourself when you cup his cheeks and pull him down for a kiss, closing your eyes when your lips meet again.
He grabs your waist, making you crawl back until you’re far enough on the mattress for your head to hit the pillows when he pushes you down. He presses his hands on your knees and you part your legs eagerly for him.
His fingers trace your skin as he brings his hand up, passing your hip bone and your waist and grabbing your boob with roughness as he slips his tongue into your mouth, wanting you to taste yourself. He pinches your nipple with his fingers, smirking against you when you whine and writhe underneath him.
You reach your hand down, not wanting to waste any more seconds, you wrap your hand around his dick again, jerking him off a few times before you line him up with your entrance, whining desperately again.
Steve breaks the kiss and opens his eyes to look at you, “you’re so desperate for my cock, huh?” He breathes, still playing with your nipple.
You raise yourself up a little, pecking his lips again as you nod your head.
He can’t believe that you are this needy for him, that you are giving him those eyes.
If only he knew how many times you have dreamt of this moment.
“Please,” you whimper.
“Please what, Blondie?” He teases you as his hand now slides down your stomach, fingertips brushing your clit, making you shiver.
You blink and you breathe heavily as you place your hand on his shoulder, “please fuck me, Steve… Please…”
A satisfied smirk appears on his face, your desperation making him feel smug – but the smugness quickly dissolves into something else when he pushes inside you and feels your tightness around him for the very first time.
You breathe in harshly and hold it, shutting your eyes when you feel him stretching you out. Nothing could have prepared you for this moment, not his tongue, not his fingers, nothing. The stretch is both painful and delicious, it makes you gasp but it also makes you drool as he inches deeper and deeper.
Steve can only curse and whimper in pleasure as he watches his cock disappearing inside of you, he doesn’t push in fully though, too scared to hurt you.
He bites his bottom lip, bottoming out again before he pushes back in, listening to the wet sound and the neediness in your voice as you moan.
“M-More,” you whine, your eyes now watching him, “please…”
His dick twitches at the sound of that and at the look on your face.
“Fuck me, Steve.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice, he pushes in deeper than before, until he’s buried inside of you completely. Usually, he would take a moment to catch his breathe, to adjust to the tightness but he is too eager, too desperate for this. So he grabs your hips and he starts thrusting, slowly at first, not wanting to hurt you.
You gasp, hands finding the sheets beneath you again as your eyes follow the movement of his hips, watching the way his dick slides in and out of you. You throw your head back and look at his face next.
Strands of his hair fall in front of his eyes, his lips are puffy from all the kissing, his cheeks are flushed. He is moaning, for you, because of you. You are in utter bliss, feeling pride swell in your chest when he moans even louder as you clench around him.
He watches the way he fucks you, eyes growing darker and darker and then, he looks at your chest, the way your tits bounce from the movements, something that prompts him to move his hips even faster, fucking into you harder now.
“F-Fuck,” you whine loudly.
His eyes meet your face and the pleasure on it is suddenly not enough for him, he wants to throw you over the edge, he needs to hear you scream for him.
He curses under his breath when you clench around him again.
Steve’s knees dig into the mattress, his fingers now holding you even stronger than before, he is sure to leave bruises but you don’t mind, you would never mind. He fastens his pace, railing into you and thrusting in and out of you, making you fall apart in the matter of a few seconds. You can’t speak, even if you tried. All that you can do is moan pathetically, letting him use you.
“You take me so well, holy shit, Blondie,” he whimpers, voicing out his thoughts, brows scrunching together as he watches you, your lips parted, moans that he only ever dreamt of leaving you. “L-Look at you, fuck. If I knew that my cock would shut you up, I would’ve done this a long time ago.”
“S-Steve!” You whine with a high pitched voice, something that only leads him to pound you even harder even if a tiny part of him wants to mock you.
Your eyes roll back, the tension in your stomach rolling back in, only stronger and hotter this time, and you already don’t know what to do with yourself, but when he suddenly reaches for your legs, hooking the back of your knees around his forearms, your eyes widen when they meet his again and a wicked smirk appears on his face as he starts fucking you from a different angle, snapping his hips into yours so wildly that you can’t help but cry out as your eyelids become droopy, tears now begging to be released, just like the drool that starts coming from the corner of your mouth.
The room now filled with nothing but the dirty sounds of your skin slapping together, the squelching noises from your pussy and his pleasing moans.
Steve watches you in awe, eyes growing wide when he sees just how cockdrunk you are for him.
He fucks you recklessly, eagerly and as though it is the last thing he will ever do.
Your tears fall freely, your whimpers turning into cries the moment his thumb finds your clit again.
He feels your walls clenching around him, gripping his twitching cock tightly – and he knows you’re close, he knows that he is close but he doesn’t want to stop, he doesn’t want this moment to be over.
Steve savors every second, pounding into you roughly and harshly, grabbing your face with his left hand when your head falls to the side, he needs to watch you, he needs to see you when you cum around him.
“You wanna cum for me?” He asks breathlessly.
You nod eagerly, without letting a word fall from your lips, you only nod and whine.
You feel the overstimulation rushing through you, the fire in your stomach that is about to burst into something bigger. You can feel him everywhere, he is so deep inside of you that it makes your body shake like crazy, but it feels good, so good that it almost wants to make you cry for different reasons when you think about how this could be a one time thing.
His hand leaves your face, he throws his palm into the pillow next to you, holding it tightly as his own eyes fall shut now, moaning your name as he picks up the pace of his fingers against your clit, his hips snapping faster into yours now.
“I-I’m–”
“I know, I know…” He coos, letting his face fall into the crook of your neck.
You feel the urge to feel him even closer, so despite the weakness in your body, you use every bit of your strength to lift your hand and press it against his warm back.
“Cum for me,” he whimpers into your neck before he bites into your flesh, marking you up for anyone to see.
A loud gasp tears out of you as his last thrusts grow rougher and his fingers move faster, you can’t help but dig your nails into his back, scratching him as stars blur your vision and the shockwaves grip your body so tightly as you cum around his cock, just as he spills into the condom, moaning into your neck.
You can’t even feel your tears nor the drool still coming out of your mouth, all that you can feel is him. Your arm now falls back onto the mattress and your eyes shutting as the darkness starts to envelope you.
“F-Fuck,” he whispers as he stops moving, pressing another kiss to your neck before he pulls out of you, hissing at the feeling.
He can feel your trembling body beneath his, the sighs that keep falling from your lips, he smugly pulls away to take a look at you, only to see your eyes dropping as you start to lose your consciousness.
“Shit,” he whispers, cupping your cheeks, “you okay, Blondie?”
You nod as best as you can, slapping his hand away as you snuggle into the pillows, not even bothering with the blanket.
He scratches the back of his neck, pressing his lips together as he watches you fall asleep so quickly. He can’t help but feel smug as he looks at the way your thighs are trembling still.
He stands up, leaving the room to walk into the bathroom, where the light is still turned on. He steps inside, noticing how the mirror is a little fogged, the smell of vanilla and strawberries lingering in the air, making his stomach flutter ever so slightly.
Discarded clothes lay on the ground, he picks them up and puts them on the counter before he rolls off the condom, tying it up before he throws it into the trash. He turns towards the sink and washes his hands before he walks back into your room, a smile tugging on his lips.
He plops down beside you, pulling the cover over you and himself, scooting closer to you.
He doesn’t know where this will go or what is going to happen tomorrow but as he looks at your stained face, and every single previous second replays in his head, he is sure of one thing.
There is not a single fucking chance that this is going to be a one time thing.
♡
tagging friends and mutuals!
@prettyboyeddiemunson @taintedcigs @mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @maroon-cardigan @munson-mjstan @sherrylyn628 @munsonlore @ibellcipem @joekeerysmoles
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington fanfic#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington angst#steve harrington smut#steve harrington enemies to lovers#stranger things angst
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Ain't No Love in Oklahoma
Summary: Tornado wrangler Tyler Owens and his crew find themselves on your farm as a tornado touches down
2.2 k words, nothing crazy.
“What a view,” Tyler mused as he looked out at the great country landscape unfolding below him. Oklahoma wasn’t known for hills or anything that really detracted from its flat-ness, so finding a spot like this where someone could see a far distance out into the expanse was rare. For storm chasing- it was a downright game changer. Like now, him and his motley crue of chasers there was a dark gray cloud formation starting to look interesting to the north.
“Dude this is so great. The thumbnails are going to go crazy if we can see one from here,” Boone agreed next to him, already swinging his iPad side to side to try and get it all. The crew of them had just been driving when they saw a break in the fence letting them get closer. Sure it might have been trespassing but who was going to care about them all the way out here?
There was a loud crack that split the silence and the ground next to Tyler sent mud flying into his pant leg. He quickly turned.
Jesus.
You sat perched on top of a brown horse, a few yards away, shotgun balancing on your hip. A wide white cowboy hat on your head covered your features, but he was equally turned on and terrified at the same time.
“Y’all got 30 seconds to start moving or the next shot won’t be as friendly,” you called out from your horse. You could see the tallest man chuckle and say something to the shorter one next to him before turning and leisurely jogging to you. What thoughts were running through his head to convince him running towards a woman with a shotgun was a good idea?
“Afternoon ma’am! Pardon my crew and I, but I feel like we’ve started on the wrong foot,” he said as he got closer. He looked straight out of a magazine cover. Chiseled face, scruff, blonde hair peeking out from his cowboy hat, with a red button down that was one button too unbuttoned. You did feel a pang of guilt for almost hitting him.
“Perhaps we did. I just don’t take kindly to trespassers on my property,” you said, swinging your horse to the side so you could face him better. Tyler rubbed his neck. Ah shit.
“That’s my bad ma’am- see we’re storm chasers, we’re always trying to find an edge to get ahead of the next storm or tornado,” he said, gesturing to the darkening sky. You slowly nodded. “My name’s Tyler Owens, you might’ve heard of me on Twitch,” he added with a charming smile as he held his hand up for a handshake. You slowly shook his hand, taking in the weird man.
“My name’s Y/N. What the hell is a Twitch?” you asked after letting go. He opened his mouth to try and explain, but decided it was fruitless.
“Well it’s a pleasure to meet you miss Y/N. Apologies again for stepping into your land, but we’ve got the looks of an EF-4 starting out there on the horizon and damn it’s going to be a good one,” he said, turning back to the crew and the sky.
“Hate to tell you Tyler but we don’t get tornadoes out here. It’s been years,” you said with a nod, but following his eyes to the sky, leaning closer to your horse and patting his neck whether for your own anxiety or his. As if on cue, a rumble of thunder rolled overhead which caused your horse to whinny.
“Global warming Y/N. Spots in Oklahoma that have never gotten hit before are getting struck. It’s up to you, but-” he said as he turned back, the clouds getting lower, “I’d get low,”. Rain started to fall in big drops as you tried to think.
“I’ve got animals Tyler, I can’t handle losing this farm,” you said as you chewed your bottom lip.
“My crew will help. Before we head out,” he said instantly as he started waving to his crew.
“IT’S COMING TYLER!” Boone shouted, waving the iPad above his head, “IT’S A BIG ONE!”. Another roll of thunder went overhead and your horse brayed again, getting antsy. Okay maybe these strangers had a point. Seeing their suped up trucks and RV showed that they either had way too much money and free-time or they could actually be trusted when it came to this stuff. Fuck it don’t be stupid.
“Get on, I have to get the cows, but you’ll tell me if it gets closer alright?” you stammered over the rain, holding out your hand to Tyler, “tell your guys to head straight for 5 minutes, there’ll be a barn and a house,”. Tyler nodded and relayed the message to Boone as he slowed the truck down passing you. Boone passed a walkie talkie out to Tyler with a nod, and waved politely to you.
“Don’t you worry ma’am you’ve got the best on your side!” he chirped, before peeling out on the truck sending a wave of mud behind him and leaving a large dent in the ground. Best? Tyler sucked air in through his teeth and sheepishly turned back to you. Before you could try to help him up he was already behind you. Obviously not his first time getting on a horse which did catch you off guard. You slung your shotgun over your back as you started heading back to the house. You felt Tyler move closer to you, gripping his hands onto your sides as your tightened your grip on the reins trying not to overthink this. Dammit you can be horny when this is over, not when a tornado is about to come through. It had been a while since any man had been so chivalrous or intriguing to you. The rain started coming down harder, making it tough to see, which only increased the worry in your stomach as you reached the cows.
“I’m gonna open the gate, you stay here!” you shouted to Tyler as you jumped down into the muddy grass, before hauling your ass to the wooden gate where the cows were already anxiously pacing by. You unlatched it and swung it open before jumping back onto the horse to start cornering the animals back to the barn. Luckily you only had a handful of cows this season, but it was still tough enough. You shouted over the rain to keep the cows moving and Tyler started doing the same. He turned his head and held a hand up to his forehead to try and get a better view.
“Y/N I don’t mean to alarm you, but I believe there’s been landfall,” he said, breathing close to your ear. You wanted to turn and check, but you also knew your job right now was keeping these animals safe.
“Just tell me if we’re in danger Tyler,” you shouted back, willing your horse to move faster. By the time you got to the barn a few minutes later the rain had turned into hail. You slid off your horse as you tried to unlock your barn gate, but the adrenaline and water made it hard. Tyler appeared next to you and gently tried his own hand at unlocking the door.
“The lock is 5999!” you shouted, the small number lock keeping the bigger doors shut. You mentally cursed this decision to have it locked at all. Tyler finally got the lock loose and threw the door open. You started pushing and shouting the cows to get inside, where the sides were already shuttering. Tyler grabbed your horse’s reins and brought him inside as well before he ran off in the chaos.
“Is that it?” Tyler asked in the doorway, wind whipping his shirt. You wiped your hands on your jeans to try to focus and dry off before nodding. Tyler suddenly grabbed the shoulders and faced you in the doorway.
“It’s going to be okay Y/N,” he said, locking eyes with you, “we have to get underground now though,”. You nodded furtively, going back to real life and focusing on the task at hand. Tornado, stay alive. You threw the barn door shut and locked it before grabbing Tyler’s hand and pulling him towards the house. The wind whipped against your face and caused your hat to fly off.
“Shit!” you screamed as you watched it get blown away in the blink of an eye.
“Come on!” Tyler shouted back, pulling you forward again towards the house. Boone was on the porch holding the door open shouting at the two of you to get in.
You two jumped into the house before Boone slammed the door shut behind you. You wanted to lay down and curl up right there, but Tyler’s crew were all trying to ask you if you had a basement or somewhere to hide or somewhere to keep down. Tyler placed his hand on the small of your back to try and help. “Hey guys one at a time alright,” he said, quieting the group.
“There’s a basement, it’s not much and I don’t know if it’s storm-proof and all that but-” you said as you moved to lift up the small door that was in the corner of the kitchen. There was a dark staircase downstairs and you shouted for everyone to get in. You screamed as the kitchen window bursted in, letting rain and hail into the house. Tyler grabbed your waist and dragged you down into the basement, door slamming shut behind you both. Everyone was huddled in the corner, light illuminating from their phones as they watched the storm overhead, continuing to chatter.
You slumped against the wall and finally took a breath. You felt the presence of someone slide beside you.
“How you feeling?” Tyler asked.
“Tired. I don’t know how you do this for a living,” you laughed as you looked up at him, laying your head on his shoulder.
“I’m not sure how I do it either all the time,” he sighed, “being able to help people feels good though. Knowing that the more we understand these things the safer the future can be,” he continued.
“Noble,” you remarked.
“When Boone isn’t recording all of it at least,” he chuckled looking over at Boone who was sure enough recording it all on his phone.
“So you’ve got fans?” you asked.
“Lots. Well, okay a fair amount? A million? Saying that to you makes it feel kind of stupid though,” he said.
“What do you mean?” you said, “a million is a lot of people watching you, that’s crazy,”.
“It’s nice and all, but damn. You have it all out here. Alone. Not needing a million people watching you. Just seems nice,” he explained, placing a hand on your knee as he waved his hand during his explanation.
“Lonely though. I bet you’re never lonely,” you murmured. He shrugged.
“I have friends, it's hard to keep a lover with this lifestyle though,” he said absentmindedly.
“Yeah, I can relate to that,” you said softly, “uhm, if we get out of this tornado thing, I’ll give you my number,” you quickly said, before hiding your face into your shoulder. Ugh what were you a high schooler? You felt his chest rise as he laughed.
“You’re cute Y/N, and I’d love to see your farm under less stormy conditions,” he grinned. Your chest fluttered.
“I’d love to show you it,” you nodded. The two of you kept chatting as the storm went on for another 30 or so minutes. Luckily the basement did a sufficient job of keeping everyone safe, but you couldn’t help but think of the barn and the rest of the house upstairs. You talked about your time growing up in Oklahoma and Arkansas. About how he went to school for meteorology, and how you dropped out of OK State to take care of the property, but you had really wanted to go back later.
“Seems safe guys!” Boone said as he stood up and kicked open the door. The kitchen was still there, and so was the house. You checked out the window, and breathed a sigh of relief to see the barn was still there.
“Cut right through- spared your stuff by like 50 yards!” Tyler said, relieved. Seemed like the best case scenario here happening. You helped his crew get set up to head back out and slowly lead the cows back out to their slightly damaged pasture.
Tyler stepped into his truck and rolled down the window. You stepped up onto the running board of the truck to get closer. You handed Tyler a post it note with your number scrawled onto it.
“Like I promised,” you said with a smile. Tyler grinned and stuck it to the computer screen in the middle console. He took off his cowboy hat and put it on your head.
“Since you lost yours. I’ll be back for it though,” he said as he moved your hair behind your ear.
“Alright tornado cowboy,” you smiled as you stepped down.
“It’s tornado wrangler actually,” he noted before blowing you a kiss and rolling up his window.
It was a few hours later when you were finally making dinner when your phone buzzed.
Hey Y/N, hope you’re doing well. Sitting at a motel. Wondering what you’re doing.
AN: let me know if anyone wants a one-off of you trying to get divorce papers to your insane storm chaser husband in the middle of the midwest ->(https://www.tumblr.com/strawburry01/756685031316062208/all-yourn-summary-you-visit-your-husband-tyler)
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Headcanons for being Angela’s younger sibling as a civilian
Angela Lopez x sibling!reader
warnings:
a/n: i will not be able to handle the finale of this season
prompt: anonymous: “If you write for Angela from the rookie would headcannons for “what being her civilian sibling would be like” be ok?”
angela is hella protective of you and for good reason
yes, you had 4 older brothers—but she was the one who always stood up for you
especially as kids
“i’m fine, mom, i can handle a few kids calling me names” -you
“the hell you will!” -angela
“you better not let mama hear you talk like that” -you
lowkey tho u would threaten kids with her presence
“my sister will beat your ass!” -you
*children running in fear*
she encourages it actually—she thinks its funny
your brothers definitely tease you for her standing up for you
“you’re gonna have to take care of yourself one day, angela isn’t always going to be there for you” -one of the brothers i cant even remember their character traits and only one has a page on fandom wiki
and one day you all grew up and took different paths, but you and angela stayed close
and through her time at the academy and as a cop, she never stopped worrying about you
i’m talking near-hourly update texts
diabla (angela): are you home yet? let me know when you’re home
y/n: i told you i was home an hour ago
diabla: are you still home?
y/n: yes i am still home
honestly when she started out as a cop she saw some pretty messed up stuff and she never stopped imagining you in those situations, it caused her a lot of anxiety
but you started worrying about her too
you might have downloaded a police scanner app to get every single update you could get your hands on
“hey, just calling to see if you’re okay. i heard that there was a call where shots were fired. call me when you can please” -you on the phone
diabla: im working, i’ll call you later. no, i’m not dead.
literal actual “wellness checks” she is. wow.
if you ever had a bad s/o she definitely has threatened them with violence
oh, and YES she will bring tim into it
tim is your bff lowkey and she hates it
“tim told me you threatened to slap a lawyer in the face today” -you
“how the hell did ti—jackson…” -angela
“they said he was a cute lawyer too” -you
“shut up” -angela
whenever there was a crazy incident (like when the CDC had crazy outbreaks) your ass would be sat tf down at that station no questions asked
you guys would have nights in with music and drinks at least once a month
jackson would try to get info on how to get on her good side whenever you crossed paths
“that’s assuming she’s got a good side, kid” -you
this lawyer guy she threatened to hit then started dating was pretty cool actually (for a lawyer)
and soon enough angela was pregnant and you were ecstatic
“i cant believe it im gonna have a nephew!! or a niece. whatever it is, this is gonna be so fun!” -you
“yeah, you think morning sickness and swollen ankles are fun?” -angela
“hey, that’s not my problem” -you
“wow, thanks” -angela
being “fake protective” to angela when it comes to her pregnancy and/or wesley (you liked bullying him)
“puto” -you, whispering in passing
“what did i do?!” -wesley
you were in their weddinggggg
the one where angela got kidnappedddddd
you put an airtag on her after that (not joking)
oh no you were a nervous wreck when this happened and there was nothing you could do. like when they told you what happened to her they thought you were joking. like no way she got kidnapped and brought to another country by a famous female drug lord to steal her baby
and you were a civilian so all you could do was stay home and have a meltdown
and yeah. you got more and more concerned for her safety after that
“you’re going to be a mom! i just want you to be safe. that situation was so…insane! what the hell was that?!” -you
“that was the job. and i like my job. and im going to keep doing my job so no one else will go through anything like that” -angela
yeah you knew you couldn’t argue with her
not soon after she was asking you to babysit
“maybe i should get you some self defense classes. just in case” -angela
“i dont know how i’ve gone this long without them” -you
you enjoyed taking care of the kiddo. even if he had that lopez attitude
“please, jack, will you stop crying?” -you, pleading with a 6 month old
he did not stop
you were not pleased
family dinners!
“maybe y/n should go into law enforcement” -wesley
“that’s not funny, wesley” -angela
“don’t make me use these karate moves i learned on you” -you
fr you did love wesley its just funny to bully your brother in law
angela needed more nights out. date night and sibling nights
so on sibling nights you made it worthwhile
and you started to get close to nyla and lucy and even celina down the line (and of course tim was still your gossip bestie)
ok this is getting long i hope you liked!!!
taglist: @summersimmerus // @locke-writes //
#the rookie#the rookie imagine#the rookie x reader#angela lopez#angela lopez x reader#angela lopez imagine#angela lopez x sibling!reader
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Crazy thought, guys, but um Among Us x tf141? Erm, this could be because I've been reading Fear of God by @ceilidho (go read it, its lit), but I don't know much about eltrich horrors, so instead, you're getting Amogus.
So the first concept I'd like to explore is reader as the imposter. Super nervous, but still trying to fulfill their duties.
You had been trying to sabotage the crew mates at every turn, but somehow, it felt like you were the victim in all of this. Soap wouldn't stop following you around, yapping about something you couldn't even pretend to hear. Foam filled your brain when you thought about how you were going to do your tasks and mess up as many as possible. You heard his voice fade out in the background. Hopefully, he'd given up his daily chirping to you and started on Gaz. You had more important things to do than be swept up in his eager conversation.
A shadow eclipsed your path.
"Y'alright, hen? Lookin' a bit pale." Soap's face invaded your personal space as he bent down to examine you. You couldn't turn neutral fast enough. His eyes had already found what they needed to. It was easy to forget how perceptive he was with the laidback show he put on for you.
Could he see the sweat on the side of your neck? Were your ears turning red?
You didn't know, but now he did. It seemed irrelevant, but any minute detail of yours was stored in a large mental filing cabinet he had marked just for you. And your physical reactions? Very relevant.
You brushed him off, mumbling an excuse about having some tasks to do, which was true enough.
After your first kill, you started spiraling. It's not like you cared about the person you killed. You just regretted how the spotlight swiveled onto you almost immediately. Price, Soap, Gaz, and Ghost had such a strong bond. They had no room to doubt one another. Which left you and a few other crew mates. How was it possible for such a simple job to turn into a nerve-wracking challenge?
It was like they could hear your internal monologuing, your repeated reminders to stay calm, and do what you were here to do. It was anxiety-riddling and humiliating. You were supposed to be causing them trouble. Yet, you found yourself in a position akin to a rat in a maze. You knew your way around, but there was someone above you who could see your every move.
You started towards Electrical, ready to mess up some wires. It wasn't a hard task, but the thought of those blue eyes on you or that silent mammoth - "Ghost," they called him - following you in the shadows, even though he wasn't an imposter, it scattered your thoughts. You opened an electrical panel, concentrating on the colors, hoping that sabotage would clear your mind.
"Blue goes with blue, love." You slammed the panel shut, your entire body stiffening as a deep voice admonished you from behind.
"Ah, John. Yeah. Sorry, so tired lately. My bad." Your words were choppy and breathy, unbelievable even to your ears. Practiced lines didn't come off as natural in person. You rewired your work, putting everything properly in place - unfamiliar movements.
You turned around to find John less than a foot away from you. You avoided eye contact and made a move to skirt around him. He gave you no space to.
"Go take a nap, sweetheart. Sure you'll feel better then." A command.
You nodded to appease him, expecting him to move out of the way and disappear into the shadows. But no. Price walked you to your room, silently matching your pace. Your own personal warden.
You shut your room door without looking back at him. Your nails dug into your skin. How could you fail such a simple task? How could you get caught?
You'd have to make up for it later. After your nap.
#john soap mactavish#john soap mctavish x reader#john price x reader#john price#tf 141 x reader#cod mw2#among us#among us 141
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Yandere Donnie Darko Hcs
A/n: I finally came around to watching Donnie Darko while I was styling my hair this morning. It was so good and omgg HIS CHARACTER!!! Love it 💜 What he voices in where he rebels against authority resonates with me in the most honest and straight up sense, it's crazy.
CW: Characterizing of psychosis without research (I am in no way claiming this is how individuals who suffer some psychosis or with schizophrenic symptoms act or feel like. This is simply a work of fiction and how I see Donnie's mental state affect the scenario), Donnie is actually very tame here except for his obvious criminal record and acts of violence, and YALL HES A MENTALLY ILL TEENAGE BOY so he's a lowkey soft okay. Y'all see him with Gretchen? So caring and passionate ugh, love him sm. <33 I try to write as close to canon as possible, but sometimes that leads to really soft yans and I kind of doubt my writing. Despite that. I like to think that not all yanderes need to be possessive killing machines in order to fit into the troupe. Everyone's got their own way of dealing with obsession, and so I think I did decently with this one lol.
Proof read a few times, so sorry for wordy/run on sentences and possible wonky grammar.
I feel like Donnie is very observant and patient with his darling. He's quite analytical for a teenage boy which leads him to take time to consider the variables that weigh within your possible relationship.
Donnie is still an awkward kid, so dont be surprised when you accidentally find him staring at you for a considerable period of time in class. In school, he doesn't approach you, seeing as the setting is already suffocating enough. He'd try to catch you after school or when you two have a little bit of privacy.
He's kinda shy and clumsy at first glance--- too talkative in his speech and self-aware of his minor fuck ups. Over time, he'll be more open to what he wants with you. Donnie might not really understand how to handle love and all of its complexities, but hell try really hard to make it work.
Yeah, y'all saw how fast he dived in for that kiss in the film?... Embarrassing, but it's true that he's quite excited to show his affection for you. He'll be "so chill with it," and he is to an extent--- not too clingy at all--- but when he's around he gives you guard dog privileges. Stays at your side and defends you from any brain rotting comments made from the guys around the neighborhood. Donnie isn't much of a fighter, but he's damn well capable of planning and executing a crime if it calls for it. One count of arson, another unaccounted for, severe property damage, and murder? Don't doubt it for one second that he won't consider further acts in the future to come.
His psychosis affects him directly when it comes to you--- as it also does with most things. He already feels so shitty with how things are going in his life, Frank voicing the many thoughts he has about you day to day stresses him further. Sometimes Donnie is scared Frank will convince him to hurt you as the countdown progresses. Despite that fear, he can't keep away from you.
This distress causes Donnie to rebel more often. As he spirals down the rabbit hole Frank keeps digging for him, the anxiety that follows with what will happen to you once the world ends lingers late at night in his bed.
Donnie's main love language is quality time. He walks with you from school and chills with you pretty much wherever. He's pretty book-smart, so he'll pitch in with your projects and homework assignments. His parents don't really seem like they care what he does most of the time, so if he's given the chance, he'll crash at your place for a few before they think he's off sleepwalking or some shit.
Donnie already knows he's slipping off the rails, placebo medication or not, Frank stays to stir the pot. He's almost scared, scared to death that you'll think he's an insane lunatic and he'll scare you off. But at the same time, why be scared if it's the truth? He has evidence, the book, and his own visions. That anxiety doesn't go away when he rambles on about the six-foot-tall bunny rabbit and how that thing has led him to the method of time travel.
You're just left there dumb founded as he stares on at you with that deadpanned look. Too late to back out now. World's ending and you don't got a boyfriend. Well, you got Donnie... and Frank's there too sometimes, but either way, you're all each other's got. You don't want to be alone do you? Donnie knows he doesn't.
He trusts you more than anyone else. Yeah he's on meds, and sure he's loony, but everyone knows that already; not that they seemed to care too much anyway. He feels like he can just exist with you around. All that pent up frustration with the looming guilt of his actions festering inside can be washed out like waves on a cold shore. Of course, it's not a cure-all, but it's damn nice compared to the bone headed friends he got and the tense dinner table back at home.
He has scratch paper in his drawers that are just filled with messy sketches of you. Not sure if he'd be the type to use sketchbooks, but he is pretty organized in his own room. Donnie just finds you so easy and beautiful to draw. Art block has nothing on this boy. He hates it when his sisters barge into his room and see any unfinished piece of you lying around. They tease him so bad about it, he wishes they'd just leave him alone.
"Ooo, is this the girl you're always wasting your time with?"
"No, gimme it. It's none of your business, and get out of my room."
"Geez, fine. Not like that's the freakiest thing you got in here anyway."
Donnie wouldn't be the extreme stalking type, but if he caught a glance of you, he wouldn't be able to look away. He'd also take into account what your daily patterns are as well as your likes and dislikes. He notices your little habits like if you constantly apply too much pressure to your mechanical pencil, making your lead break. He's always have had a passive opinion on the school uniform, but you made it look good, great even. Donnie likes it even more seeing you in street wear. He takes note on your style and even thinks of taking some inspiration from it to feel closer to you.
He's sensitive in places a teenager would be in most. He's irritable and closed off much of the time, even to you if it gets bad enough. Of course, it's not your fault usually. It only makes sense to be defensive in the case of anything he may perceive as a threat, even if that means any possibility of you breaking his heart.
Donnie may be a bit shy in his advances, but what he isn't is hesitant. He's quite bold in his thoughts and feelings. While he is afraid of your judgement in particular, he doesn't mind doing many things in front of you. Your collar is crooked, so let him just fix it up real quick. Talk about something that's got him thinking? He's letting his thoughts pour out like it's happy hour. He sees no issue in doing what he wants to, so if you're feeling unsure or nervous about something, he'll be the one to do it for you. Not many questions asked unless it's got his serious attention.
Kisses are passionate and deep. (Tbh when I first watched the movie I was like, "DAMN dont eat her face- shit.") I dont know if Donnie has had previous experience or not, but he's definitely got the enthusiasm. He tries to match your rhythm if you seem to have trouble following. Not too much tongue, but best believe he's devouring your lips like it's the last 6 hours in the universe. His hands are roaming around your body, feeling the dips and curves so cautiously because Jesus, you're just rocking his fucking world. If you tell him to slow down, he will. Donnie never wants to force you to do anything you wouldn't want to.
Words of affirmation aren't really a thing for him. If he says something to you, it was probably on his mind anyway. If you say "I love you" to him, he'd be almost stunned but wouldn't have a problem reciprocating that energy. He just felt like that connection between you two was already clear enough. No need to say it so directly. Although, it's nice. He really loves and cares for you. Would take a bullet for you--- cross his heart till he dies, all that sappy shit.
If you reject him, let's just say Frank and Donnie will be speaking more often. It pushes him off the edge. Frank isn't in Donnie's head just to do evil shit, but it's not like his presence doesn't perpetuate Donnie's behavior further. He wouldn't go on a killing spree or anything excessively violent like that. He'd be hyper-focused on the time travel aspect of his situation and become more forceful in his methods. He'd demand answers to make sense of all of it. To cope with the fact you didn't want him like how he needed you. Why didn't you like him enough? What didn't he do? Actually, what did he do? His mind feels like its on the brink of breaking as he tries to rationalize all the negativity in his life. He's already done too much, his world feels like it's collapsing in on itself before the actual day could even come. You were a majority of that world, and now it's just broken.
Donnie is so distraught and confused about his adolescent experiences, he almost doesn't know what to do. The only thing to do from then on is to focus on the countdown. Time travel, and how to fix it all. Otherwise, not only would he be left alone, but you would be too. Donnie wouldn't want that for you, not ever. Even with all the pain and frustration stowed away inside his still beating heart, he would never wish to hurt you; one of the only people on Earth who didn't suck so much as everyone else did.
#yandere#x reader#yandere blog#male yandere#yandere x reader#donnie darko#wrote this a while ago#but i feel like this is an improvement to most of my writing ive posted here#mostly bc i usually nevee post writing...#lol#yandere donnie darko#donnie darko x reader#um now to fill the tags with random shit#this is my fav part of tumblr#ITS SO NORMALIZED TO RAMBLE N YAP IN THE TAGS#its like a reward#stay silly#grah#grah grah grah boom bitch#BRRRRRRBRAH#Che ah o ah yea#want it like dat#chat this is kinda fire yo#(lemme have this)#delusionalness#DAMN#WHEN IS IT GONNA GET TO 30 TAGS YET#I aint posting till i get to 30#brah#yandere donnie darko x reader
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Unyielding- Rhea Ripley

After a shocking phone call turns Rheas world upside down, she rushes to the hospital to find her roommate—her closest confidant and secret crush—recovering from a car accident. As emotions run high, the tension between them shifts, forcing Rhea to confront the truth: some bonds are too unyielding to ignore.
Likes,comments and reblogs always appreciated💛😈
As Rhea Ripley stood in the bustling airport terminal, her phone rang, its tone cutting through the ambient noise. Glancing at the screen, she saw an unfamiliar number displayed. She wasn’t sure why she felt compelled to pick it up—maybe residual anxiety or sleep deprivation. The fact that she’d texted you almost two hours ago and heard nothing back gnawed at her.
“Hello, is this Rhea Ripley?” a calm voice inquired.
“Yes, this is she,” Rhea replied, her voice tinged with apprehension.
“Ms. Ripley, this is Nurse Thompson from L.A. General Hospital. Your roommate has been admitted following a car accident.”
Rhea’s breath caught, her world narrowing to the words coming through the phone. “Uh, okay, fuck, I… I’m about to board a flight home.”
“I understand this is overwhelming,” Nurse Thompson said gently. “She’s conscious and talking with her doctor.”
“Thank you,” Rhea managed to say before ending the call, her hands trembling. Could’ve led with that, she thought, frustration mingling with relief.
She stood motionless for a moment, the weight of the news pressing down on her. The announcement for her flight echoed in the background, but her focus had shifted entirely. She handed the gate agent her ticket and headed down the terminal, feet feeling heavier than any weight she’d lifted. She sat in her seat with her hood up, trying to steady her racing thoughts.
~
“Miss,” the nurse assigned to you for the past few hours peeked around the curtain, her overwhelming positivity evident. You offered her a tired smile in return.
“I’ve been gone for three days,” Rhea groaned, her eyes scanning your body for injuries. Her hands clenched and unclenched, torn between wanting to hold you and fearing she might cause you pain. “I thought you might set our place on fire, but crashing your car and a concussion…”
“Someone t-boned my car; I didn’t crash it,” you defended yourself, though it seemed she didn’t hear you. “Hey, I’m okay,” you tried again.
“No, you’re clearly not,” she retorted, her eyes burning as they met yours. You swallowed thickly. “You’re sitting in a hospital bed with a head injury.”
“It’s minor; it won’t mess with your schedule,” you said, hoping to ease her concern.
Rhea’s eyes narrowed, her frustration evident. “Won’t mess with…?” She sighed angrily, gripping the metal rail on the side of your bed as she leaned down, closing her eyes. “That isn’t my concern.”
Her scoff confused you as you tried to understand why your roommate was so upset.
“No, I guess I shouldn’t assume you’d take care of m—” you began, but she pushed off the rail, rubbing her hands over her face as she laughed quietly.
“You’re going to be the death of me,” Rhea hissed, pacing within the confined space of the room.
The tension in the room was palpable, a mix of concern, frustration, and unspoken emotions hanging in the air.
Rhea’s pacing halted abruptly, her eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath catch. “I can’t leave you alone for one second without you hurting yourself, can I?”
You opened your mouth to respond, your voice soft. “I mean, I’m fine, so it’s oka—”
“No,” she interrupted, her tone firm and edged with frustration. “It’s not okay. Not when I feel like I’m going to go batshit fucking crazy, thinking about you being hurt.”
The room fell into a heavy silence, the weight of her words settling over you both. You reached out, your fingers brushing against her hand, offering a silent apology and seeking reassurance.
Rhea’s gaze softened at your touch, her fingers intertwining with yours. “I just… I can’t bear the thought of losing you,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.
You squeezed her hand gently, your eyes meeting hers with a promise. “I’m not going anywhere,” you assured her.
Rhea’s eyes, previously stormy with concern, now softened as she gazed at you. The tension in her shoulders eased, and she took a tentative step closer, her fingers gently brushing a stray lock of hair behind your ear. The warmth of her touch sent a comforting shiver down your spine, grounding you in the reality of the moment.
“I’m sorry for worrying you,” you whispered, your voice trembling with emotion.
She shook her head slowly, a small, tender smile playing on her lips. “Just promise me you’ll be more careful,” she murmured, her breath mingling with yours as she leaned in, the proximity creating a charged intimacy between you.
“I promise,” you replied, your words a mere breath against her lips.
The space between you seemed to disappear as Rhea closed the distance, her lips meeting yours in a kiss that was both gentle and profound. The world outside the hospital room faded away, leaving only the sensation of her warmth enveloping you. Her lips were soft, moving with a tenderness that spoke of unspoken promises and deep affection.
As the kiss deepened, her hand cupped your cheek, her thumb tracing soothing circles against your skin. The connection between you was palpable, a silent communication of love and reassurance that words could never fully convey.
When you finally parted, both breathless and hearts racing, Rhea rested her forehead against yours, her eyes closed as if savoring the closeness. “I love you,” she whispered, the words a sacred vow between you.
“I love you too,” you replied, your voice filled with unwavering certainty.
I don’t know what this is I was high and inspired and then came back to it…🤷🏻♀️😂
#mami rhea#rhea ripley#rhea ripley fanfic#rhea ripley fanfiction#wwe one shot#wwe raw#rhea ripley fluff#rhea ripley x reader#rhea ripley x you#wwe#rhea ripley angst#rhea ripley x fem reader#rhea ripley x oc#rhea ripley smut#wwe rhea ripley#wweraw#monday night mami#wwe monday night raw#monday night raw#wwe nxt
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{ 158 }
penpal.
academy arc
jinwoo sung x fem.reader
were you going crazy?
what was up with those shadows surrounding your classmate?
settled off to the left side of the classroom, you watch sung jinwoo from your periphery, seeing what looked liked dark wisps surrounding the entirety of his form. the boy was simply reading the pages of his textbook, yet something about him terrified you.
you weren't sure just how long you had been staring at him, your gaze following the tiny wisps of shadow as it seemed to dance around him-
before stiffening when your gaze met with his cool, grey eyes.
becoming paralyzed, you found that you couldn't look away from him, with jinwoo gently flashing you a kind smile. he opens his mouth, ready to greet you when four rowdy classmates interrupts him, surrounding his desk as low chuckles echo throughout the area.
you wanted to call out to them, to somehow warn them-
but no words could come out.
"wow, you're a big shot, aren't you? wearing that glove and all."
"why are you only wearing it on one hand, though? is there a black flame dragon in it or something?"
"ughhhh, my hand!! the black flame cow in my right hand is roaring-!!"
the four males began to laugh incessantly, making your anxiety shoot through the roof. you trail your gaze over to his gloved hand...
"hey, look. take off your glove. let me try it on." one of the boys demanded, further making you anxious at what was to come.
jinwoo remains silent, completely unfazed by these goons who were trying so hard to intimidate him. you had to fight back a grin, feeling the tiniest bit of admiration despite the anxieties you held for him.
"bastard, are your ears stuffed or something? why aren't you replying when we asked you to take off your glove?"
"what is it? do you have a tattoo on your left hand or something?"
jinwoo lets out a huff in response before taking off his glove, revealing a severely burned hand. your throat was felt clenching up in response once more when you caught a glimpse of his scars-
scars that appeared like deadly spiderwebs against his pale skin-
scars that were certainly not normal.
"what? never seen a burn wound before?" jinwoo's voice retained its tranquil quality, causing a wave of discomfort to be seen across the four rowdy students as they each clicked their tongues in utter disgust and disdain.
"we were just joking around, why get all serious?"
"just wear that glove again, i'm scared i'll get nightmares about it."
"FUCKING DISGUSTING."
you watch as the four boys proceed to exit the classroom, only to see a flash of purple from your periphery as an invisible force made them freeze before tripping over the doorway, landing headfirst into the floor (the sudden impact causing the students who were currently out in the hallway to laugh at them).
your heart was racing, nearly stifling you with its anxious beats when you look back at jinwoo to see him smiling at you. he calmly meets your gaze for a brief moment before giving you a wink (acting like he had shared some inside joke with you), catching you completely off guard.
he turns his attention back to his textbook and continues to read, sometimes sneaking glances at you while keeping that knowing smile on his handsome features, making you purse your lips in response.
looking away from him, you pretend to look down at your own handwritten notes, yet the sensation of his eyes being on you never seemed to cease.
{ ... }
the discomfort and anxiety you felt each time you sat next to jinwoo became too much to bear when you asked to switch seats with another girl from your class.
of course, she hadn't the slightest clue about the general offness seen with jinwoo. you knew that all she saw when it came to jinwoo was a cute boy that was top of the class.
but no one ever did notice the strange way his eyes seemed to glow-
how his mannerisms and style of speaking were a tad bit too mature for a mere teenager-
or how there were an almost constant presence of shadows surrounding him.
admittedly, sung jinwoo freaked you out.
even now, when you were literally three desks away from him, you swore that you could feel his piercing gaze against your back.
and you didn't know what you could have possibly done to have warranted such attention from him.
only when class had ended were you finally able to breathe, knowing that jinwoo had track for the next couple of hours. he had already left the classroom when you slowly began to pack your belongings together. adjusting the blouse of your uniform, you brush back your hair and begin making your way to the library to find a few good books to read before heading home.
the moment you stepped into the room filled with books, you let out a happy sigh. breathing in the fresh scent of pages, you eagerly step into the library and head to your favorite aisles.
fantasy... romance... mystery... gahhhh there's so many good books to read! it's a shame we can only check out 4 books at a time...
you think bitterly to yourself, taking a few books off the shelf when a flash of purple catches your attention. with a tilt of your head, you look out the window to see jinwoo settled directly below you. he was taking casual sips of his water all while sneaking glances at you from his periphery.
you pout, resting your free hand against the glass, gaze narrowing down at him. jinwoo realizes that he had caught your attention, fully facing you now as he lifted up his hands to give you a tiny wave. the suddenly soft and sweet action was enough to make the heat grow against your cheeks, with you unable to ignore the gesture as you wave back at him.
his smile was enough to distract you from the lengthening of your shadow made in response to the setting sun, distracting you from seeing the several, glowing purple eyes that remained hidden from within its dark depths.
{ ... }
the morning you came into your school, you saw something fall out of your locker, making you question how such a note could have gotten into the metal compartment.
for starters, it had a lock on it-
a lock that only you had the key to.
so just how did this folded note even reach you?
you shake your head and ignored all logic when it came to how you had gotten this note, proceeding to unfold the piece of paper as it read:
your eyes and smile are really beautiful. tell me, are you seeing anyone right now? ( s. monarch )
your throat turns dry upon reading the note, making your heart race in response.
was this person... actually flirting with you through a note?
and just what kind of nickname was s. monarch?
was this guy just really cocky or something?
yet, even knowing that this note was kind of cheesy, why did it succeed in making you smile?
you look down at the page to see that it had plenty of space for you to write your reply. trying to hide back your grin, you take out your favorite pen and decide to write:
thank you for your compliment. i am not seeing anyone at the moment, but i'm curious- who are you?
you sign off the note with your full name before placing it back within the confines of your locker, somehow knowing that your face was completely flustered right now.
your good mood had dramatically increased, and you found yourself looking forward to talking to this new penpal of yours.
{ ... }
your eyes and smile are really beautiful. tell me, are you seeing anyone right now?
thank you for your compliment. i am not seeing anyone at the moment, but i'm curious- who are you?
ah, i'm sorry, i can't say. it would ruin the mystery :)
mystery?? why would you wish to keep your identity a secret, monarch?
i have my reasons. besides... i want to use this chance to get to know you better.
may i ask how you're able to read and place new notes within my locker?
nope, sorry. it's still a secret ;)
ugh, you're kind of annoying, monarch -_-
i've been called much worse. :)
{ ... }
you spend the next couple of weeks exchanging notes with monarch, giggling each time he asked questions about you, like wanting to know your favorite color-
favorite books-
favorite foods-
just, anything and everything that made you who you are.
while you answered each of his questions, you would read his own responses pertaining to his own personal interests.
you could say purple and black are my favorite colors.
i wasn't much of a big reader before, but i'm enjoying a lot of murder mystery books. maybe you can recommend me some other good novels to read?
my favorite foods are pretty much anything that my mom makes, haha, but kimchi stew and bulgogi beef are my personal favorites.
altogether, he seemed like your typical, teenaged boy. the conversations you had with him remained light-hearted and fun.
but that all changed when you received today's note within your locker during your lunch break:
what do you think of sung jinwoo? i notice you tend to avoid him a lot.
your eyebrows furrow in response to his question, wondering why monarch would even care about how you felt when it came to jinwoo. however, you were always honest with him before, so you saw no reason to lie to him now.
you truly want an honest answer? well, to put it bluntly, jinwoo terrifies me. there's just this... really strange and dark aura about him? yet no one seems to notice it but me. sure, he's plenty polite on the surface, but... i feel like there's more to him than meets the eye. it's almost like... he has some secret, one that no one can understand, but keeps well hidden? ah, sorry, i am well aware that i am not making any sense, but it's how i really feel. jinwoo makes me feel anxious.
after finishing your note, you place it back within your locker before walking back to your classroom.
somehow, you couldn't ignore the sensation that you were missing something vital...
that there was some connection you just weren't seeing when it came to monarch and sung jinwoo...
{ ... }
your heart was racing when class ended for the day, and you wondered if monarch had already sent you a reply. with a noticeable bounce in your step, you go to your locker and unlock it, seeing a brand new note settled atop your various notebooks.
meet me at the library after school.
a painful clench was felt at the base of your throat, with you picking up the single note, your hands trembling as you fought to calm down. letting out a deep breath, you close your locker and brush back your hair, holding monarch's latest note close to your chest.
were you getting nervous?
why did your legs feel stiff and heavy all of a sudden?
with each step you take, getting oh so much closer to the library, you swore that your heart was going to choke you with its rapid palpitations-
praying that you wouldn't suddenly die of a heart attack, you open the door to the library-
only to see a lone figure standing in front of the window. the setting sun shining directly in your eyes made it difficult for you to see who it was, giving you no choice but to come closer to the person.
wiping away the tears from your eyes, you stepped closer and finally saw just who monarch truly was-
letting out a gasp when sung jinwoo himself was looking at you with those same, glowing eyes.
"you... you're monarch?!" that was all that you could manage, the anxiety immediately becoming worse as your heart continued to beat faster within the confines of your chest.
a rich chuckle escapes from his lips, "indeed, i am." he confirms your suspicions before taking a step closer to you.
jinwoo seemed unaware (or perhaps he just didn't care?) about your mounting discomfort and anxieties, still coming closer to you as you continued to take several steps away from him.
only when your back met with one of the sides of the bookshelves did you finally stop, with jinwoo smiling down at you. he places his gloved hand against the shelf, trapping you against him.
with his free hand, he gently traces at your bottom lip, making your breath hitch in response. despite how much of a nervous wreck he made you, you couldn't ignore the sudden warmth you felt spreading across your veins at the look of adoration he gives you.
"you have plenty of good reasons to fear me, i'll admit, but... is it really just fear and anxiety that you feel for me...?"
his whisper was almost seductive, trailing his fingertips down your features before gently grabbing a hold of your chin.
"or have you mistaken your anxieties with feelings of love for me, too?"
your breathing comes out in uneven breaths, and you could feel your cheeks further heating up in response as your heart skipped several beats-
"wait, you said too, did you just hint that- that you feel love for me?"
jinwoo's glowing purple eyes became alight with amusement as he gives you an eager nod. "obviously, these feelings of mine have only grown since the moment i saw you again..."
you became speechless then, watching with bated breath when jinwoo inches closer and closer to you, "despite how long it's been for me, you have not changed... not even a little bit, sarang."
your knees immediately become weaker when jinwoo calls you by that sweet term of endearment, and you nearly fell to your knees when he finally kisses you. his arms were kept locked around your waist, kissing you with a fervor that made you feel oddly nostalgic-
perhaps you had no reason to fear sung jinwoo after all; especially with how addicting his kisses had quickly become to you.
a.n. - and we are so back with the fluff i have always loved writing about! i am so happy, passing a really difficult final exam as i look forward to the rest of my academic year 😭 so i decided to write another jinwoo story!
all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.
#sung jinwoo x reader#jinwoo sung x reader#jinwoo sung x you#sung jinwoo x you#solo leveling x reader#solo leveling#sung jinwoo#jinwoo sung#.stories
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Has this ever happened to you?
Placements that you should keep an eye on-
[Edit:don't be confused about the placements i mentioned below. Ask if you have any doubts. Share your own experiences with these placements. And read the title carefully! The placements alone may or may not cause this, some other placements can alter that as well. Still if you have any confusion or doubts, you can send me your birth details with your question and ill be more than happy to answer! {I dont charge :)}]
Any planet (except for outer) as your 5th lord, sitting in the 12th house: look at the sign, sidereal (It is VERY important to look at the sidereal placements for accuracy). Besides having soooo maaaany hidden talents, it attracts hidden stalkers. For eg- sun sitting in the 12th house as the 5th house lord in the sign leo, anyone with leo placements will go INSANELY crazy for you and they WILL NOT hear "no" from you. It is very invasive and disgusting, potentially leading to feelings of anxiety and fear in you.
Lilith in the 1st house: 5th, 7th, 10th and 12th are also affected with this BUT lilith in the 1st is THE MOST AFFECTED PLACEMENT. No matter what sign you have, one thing is for sure no one will stand up for you, no will be ever be real with you, everyone will try to humble you down. Especially with females, not one female friend of yours is true to you, nor they ever will be. Not even the new friends that you'll be making. Now if you are feeling that no it is not like that my friend is not like that, wait, time will tell the truth.
Mars in cancer: worse if its in the 4th and retrograde. Mars doesn't do well with emotions, it's an energy and it wants to be set free. One thing is sure, your family is against you no matter how much they tell you and show you that they love you. It's an act. Wait until you evasdrop.
For women; men will try to dominate you, tell you things you want to hear, to gain control over you. For men; all of your male friends, are not your friends. All. Of. Them. If you are committed, women will try to manipulate you into leaving your partner. Do not.
Pisces/Sagittarius/cancer sun/moon in the 12th house: first and foremost, I salute you for surviving 🫡. If youre thinking "it will get easy", it. Will. Not. You will eventually have to remove yourself from whatever gave you hell.
Saturn+moon+north/south node in the 2nd, 4th, 6th or 12th: the good side is; WONDERFUL self control, GREAT and in depth knowledge of humans, it can take you to great positions but with perseverance. Now the negatives; anxiety that is almost impossible to control. Irrational fears. Women figures in your home or relatives will always be after you to attack you. It will definitely take you away from your home (physical or mental distance). But you will always be chased after by your family, relatives, cousins, oldest friends, ex friends, exes.... I mean the jealous ones.
Scorpio rising/ascendant: the ones you consider your "loved ones" or "closest to me", do they feel the same about you?.... hmm?. Read that again.
You need to be very very VERY cautious with people you meet, your every friend, even the childhood ones, literally everyone, even your siblings or cousins. They may or may not be real with you. Look for- guilt tripping, victim card, women's card, attention seeking, emotional manipulation, using your past against you, grandiosity, self centeredness (even if it is subtle), gaslighting by minimization, emotional triangulation, love bombing, projection reversal, etc. If you suspect someone close to you has narcissistic tendencies, cut them off. If your can't, ignore them. I know it is hard, but you will not give them power over you.
Neptune on the ascendant: no one will ever know the real you. No one will ever believe you. Even if you tell them about yourself. There's no "first impression is the last impression" for others, it's "someone told me you are like that so i'll always believe you are like that" for others. Annnd its also gonna come from the people you never expected.
8th house synastry with your best friends, cousins or siblings: ooooffff.... that shit will hurt badly. Once there is "THAT" fight, ykwim, there's no going back. No rebuilding bonds, no trusting anyone ever again, emotional exhaustion. Watch them tell your secrets to the people you both disliked, watch them replace you so quickly, watch them do the things they told you they will never do, watch them befriend people they said were not nice, watch them playing the victim card. And then one day they'll come back again and act like they've changed, when its just to use you again. A whole new level of narcissism here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There are more! Stay tuned.
#astrology observations#astro notes#astro placements#astrology placements#astro community#astrology notes#synastry observations
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