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nothingeverlost · 4 years

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The One You’re Born into and the One You Find (Marauder Era HP fic)

Thing I was not planning to do this week: write 10,000 words about Sirius Black. He’s an insistent muse, though, so a little drabble about him and Andromeda talking as now a full blown fic about the time Sirius ran away from home.

Summery: Sirius runs away and finds out something about home.

Warnings for references to abuse/torture.

It’s two days before Christmas when Sirius Black leaves Grimmauld Place for the last time. His first impulse is to go to the Potter home, but he can’t, not with his mother’s voice in his head, the threats and ugly things she’s said. He can’t risk that she might follow through with her promises. It’s not safe. Besides, James would owl Peter and Remus, and he needs to keep them safe too.

Perhaps it would be best to take a room above the Three Broomsticks, but after a week of cold silence from his family he can’t take any more isolation. There’s only one place he can think of to go.

“Sirius?” Warm light floods the front stoop when the door opens. In the doorway stands his cousin, the only person that might understand what it means to be a disinherited Black.

“You wouldn’t happen to have a sofa I could crash on for a day or two, would you ‘Dromeda?” They’ve barely talked in years; the last time was the summer before Fifth year when they both happened to be at Diagon Alley. He’d been with his friends, his parents not wanting to be seen with their son who was buying a new Gryffindor uniform, ‘Dromda with her husband. He’d been eight when she’d been struck off the family tree, but she would always be his favorite cousin. His only cousin, now.

“Nonsense. You’ll take the guest room. I hope your silencing charms are up to par; our Nymphadora is an early riser.” She holds the door open wide for him, enough so he can levitate his trunk into the house. He’s not sure about accepting the room, though.

“Mother is going to be angry if she finds out you took me in. I really only need a day or two so I can figure things out.” He needs a lot more than a couple of days but he wasn’t about to ask for more. It isn’t fair to her.

“Auntie has been angry with me for almost a decade now. I’m a blood traitor, after all. It doesn’t get much worse than marrying a muggle-born. You’ll stay as long as you need.” Andromeda doesn’t roll her eyes, she wouldn’t stoop to something so immature, but Sirius can almost see it anyway. “Now shut the door behind you and come into the kitchen. Ted is cleaning up but there’s plenty of leftovers and I’m sure you’re hungry. Left before dinner, didn’t you?”

“During, but I didn’t eat anything.” There had been company, people that made Sirius’s skin crawl. His father had spoken so casually of his son joining The Cause, only debating if he should wait to finish his education or begin during the coming summer. Perhaps, Orion Balck had speculated, his position in Gryffindor could end up being a blessing in disguise. No one would expect a Death Eater under the scarlet and gold robes.

“You’re in luck. Ted made his beef stew and it’s just the thing for a cold evening like this.” She doesn’t say, but they both understand, that ‘cold’ refers to more than the weather. “Ted, my love, we’ve company.”

“Cousin Sirius, what a treat. Welcome.” Sirius is surprised by the warm welcome and the following hug. Perhaps he shouldn’t be; Ted Tonks is a muggle and a Hufflepuff, after all, but the only person he knows who is so open is James.

“Do you mind reheating some of your stew, Ted? Siri hasn’t had dinner. I’ll put Dora to bed.”

“Her hair is pink.” Sirius has almost forgotten that there was a kid. His family doesn’t acknowledge the marriage let alone the child, and kids aren’t really his thing. He can’t remember the last time he’s seen a kid younger than eleven. Andromeda’s daughter is a lot smaller than a first year. Not as shy as they were either, as she climbs up on a chair to get a better look at the stranger in her house.

“Play?’ Sirius is pretty sure the tips of her hair darkened.

“Nymphadora, this is your cousin Sirius. You can play with him tomorrow but now it’s time for bed.”

“See-us.” The little girl wrinkles up her nose as she tests out the name. “See-e-us.”

“My friends call me Padfoot sometimes.” It might be easier to say. No one in his family considered easy names, it seemed. Not ever his cousin. Nymphadora, really?

“Padfoot play?” She spreads her arms and jumps, leaving Sirius with no choice but to catch her. She is a little thing, with less force than a bludger, but she squirms a lot.

“Tomorrow,” Andromeda says firmly, helping to free Sirius from arms that seemed to be longer than they should be. “I’ll be back down after storytime, Sirius. Don’t worry about your trunk, I’ll take it up to your room. Ted will show you where the drinks are. There might even be a bit of firewhiskey to add to the butterbeer.”

His mother would be horrified to see him eating in the kitchen like a common person or a house elf. The Tonks kitchen is a warm and comfortable room, though, and Sirius is glad to sit with Ted, who is keeping an eye on the cleaning charms. They share a drink and Sirius empties a bowl of stew and accepts the second helping Ted gives him It wasn’t like the food was bad at Grimmauld Place; it was the company that robbed him of his appetite. He is too used to laughter and teasing and camaraderie as he eats with his mates at school, and out of practice choking down food under his mother’s sour expression and his father’s ranting.

“I’m sorry to spring this on you, Ted.” He is halfway through his second bowl when he finally looks up at his companion. He doesn’t know much about the man, other than the fact he was muggle-born, a Hufflepuff, and married to his cousin.

“Nonsense, you’re family. It’s a rare treat for Andi to get to have family around. You know what it’s like.” Ted frowns.

“She’s lucky she got out when she did.” Just this past summer the engagement between Cisssa and Malfoy had been announced. The only good thing Sirius could say is that he wasn’t quite as disgusting as Bella’s husband. The talk of pure blood had gotten worse at family dinners and words like ‘cleanse’ and ‘purify’ were tossed around more. “They don’t bother you, do they?”

“Ignore us completely, which is probably for the best. It’s not easy on Andi when we run into any of them in public, though. We saw Narcissa when we were at Gringotts last and she wouldn’t even look at our Dora. I don’t think Bellatrix has even seen her.”

“Best to keep it that way. She’s gone mental. More mental than she used to be. And her husband…” Sirius bites his tongue to keep from saying more. He didn’t need to talk about Rabistan LeStrange. Didn’t need to think about him, or what he was capable of. One time alone with the man had been one time too many; he still had bruises on his arm from their ‘conversation’ three days ago. “If you’re lucky they’ll forget about you completely.”

“Your turn, Ted. Dora’s tucked in and ready for her story.” Sirius is almost done with his second bowl of stew when Andromeda comes down, turning off the water in the sink as the last of the dishes dry themselves. She settles into the seat her husband had occupied moments ago. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“What’s the point? It’s over and I’m never going back. I’ve probably been blasted off that damn tapestry already.” It had been his mother’s last threat as he’d left as if the worst thing that could happen was being disowned by the family that hated not only him but everything he cared about.

“Walking away from family isn’t that easy. I know.” For a moment she looks lost in memories before shaking her head.

“Family doesn’t…” Sirius clenches his hands around the edge of the table. He doesn’t talk about the things that happened in his home, not even to James. Andromeda would understand more than anyone else, but that doesn’t make it easier to speak. “They’re not my family. I have James and Remus and Peter.”

“You have me and Ted too.” Andromeda reaches across the table and covers one of his hands with her own. “It’s two more weeks until term starts. You’ll stay here and we can take you to the train.”

“I wasn’t planning on staying that long.” He hasn’t planned anything but thought perhaps he might be able to leave for school sooner. Hogwarts would be safe.

“You’re staying. It’s Christmas, Sirius. And if you’re worried about earning your keep you don’t have to worry. Dora will adore having a new friend and you can pay us back in imaginary tea parties.”

Exhausted, Sirius falls asleep almost the moment he turns off the light in the guest bedroom. It doesn’t last; a few hours later he comes awake abruptly, gasping his way out of a dream. He fumbles for his wand, casting a ‘Lumos’ as he sits up. He needs to be sure he doesn’t fall asleep again, not while the dream slithers inside his mind.

He barely noticed the bedroom when his cousin had escorted him up, beyond noting that his trunk was under the window. Everything he owned was in his trunk, and he only had that much because he’d never unpacked it when he’d gotten home for winter hols. He’d gone up, grabbed it and his broom, and had been heading for the front door before anyone could stop him. There hadn’t been any time to get Freddie, his owl, from the family owlery. He hoped his mother didn’t take out any of her anger on poor Freddie.

The room, now that he can focus better, is as different as it was possible to be from the bedroom he’d abandon hours ago. Instead of grey walls and antique furniture that had been passed down for generations, the walls were painted a pale yellow and the bed was new. The quilt he’d been sleeping under seemed handmade, a patchwork of mismatched colors that would never earn his mother’s approval. On the wall across from the bed is a painting of the shore, waves gently lapping at the sand. It reminds him of a trip he’d taken with the Potters the summer between fourth and fifth years; Remus had joined them as well, though Peter hadn’t been allowed to come. It wasn’t home - the only home he knew being his dorm at Hogwarts - but it was a cheerful and cozy space.

He hoped his presence didn’t make it an unsafe place. While his mother had been the loudest with her threats it was harder to guess what recourse his father might take. Or his father’s friends. He would run again if he needed to. Sirius resolved not to unpack his trunk in case any threats were made. If anyone in his family so much as sent an owl he’d be off.

It’s dark outside his bedroom window, enough that he can’t make out anything in the back garden. The moon wasn’t much more than a sliver, which was good. It would be two weeks until Remus would need him. If he was still with Andromeda and Ted by then he could make an excuse for going back to school early. Until then he would lie low and hope that his family decided he was no longer worth any of their time.

After an hour of trying to go back to sleep, Sirius transforms and curls up at the foot of the bed. Sometimes it is easier to sleep for a few hours as Padfoot; he would just have to hope his cousin didn’t ask about the black fur.

Someone is trying to suffocate him. His mouth is covered, his lungs straining for want of oxygen. He can hear Bella’s laughter and see the cold steel of his mother’s eyes. Behind her, Regulus looked ill.

“Ge-off,” Sirius struggles to open his mouth, to take in a breath, and almost chokes on a piece of bacon. He blinks and opens his eyes to find that he isn’t in Grimmauld Place. He’s in Andromeda’s guest room, and he is chewing on a piece of bacon.

“Breakfast.” Nymphadora’s hair is blue this morning and she is holding out a piece of bacon between two chubby fingers. “Welcome.”

“Thank you?” He can’t think of anything else to say. Waking up to find a kid staring at him is odd, but it was a million times better than anything that had happened the day before.

“Dora, where are you?” The door to the hallway is open; apparently the kid was old enough to open doors because Sirius had closed it the night before. He can’t sleep when a door is open, it felt too vulnerable. At home he locked the door, even knowing that wouldn’t really stop anyone. At school he was grateful for the curtains around the bed. Here the door was now open and Ted was coming in, shaking his head. “Sorry about that, mate. Did she wake you?”

“I’d rather be awake.” Memories weren’t quite as bad as dreams.

“Breakfast is ready if you’d like to join us, I promise you can eat at your own pace, and not worry about this little scamp trying to feed you more. You’re lucky it was just bacon. She might have decided you were thirsty.” Ted grins, an easy expression that reminds him a little of James. His best friend’s smile comes easily too. Sirius wonders if Ted’s parents were also as wonderful as the Potters.

“I’ll be down in a minute.” He’s only slept in his pants and waits until Ted had scooped up his daughter and taken her out of the room, closing the door behind him, before getting out of bed so he could dress.

Breakfast was as good as any meal he’d had at Hogwarts. Ted, apparently, did all the cooking in the family. His cousin had learned as much cooking as he had, which meant nothing at all. Pureblood snobs were supposed to have house elves to tend to their needs, rather than actually learning anything practical. Ted cooked the muggle way, and his scones were good enough that Sirius had three. He eats some bacon too, as well as quiche.

His plan for the day is to hole up in the guest room. It was Christmas Eve and he didn’t want to interfere with the holiday for his cousin’s family. Christmas wasn’t a big deal anyway; he loves the traditions he shares with his friends before the holidays but generally spent the day itself being miserable. Andromeda has other ideas.

Once breakfast is over and the dishes are put away she pulls out flour, butter, sugar, eggs, and a mass of sprinkles. Sirius somehow finds himself rolling out dough and cutting out cookies, often with the ‘help’ of Dora. Once the first batch cooled he is in charge of frosting while Dora added three times as many sprinkles as anyone would call normal. Somehow there was frosting in his hair and he is certain that his fingers would be red and green for longer than they were the last time he’d ‘accidentally’ snuck dye into James’s shampoo, but it is the most fun he’s had on a Christmas Eve in years. When he makes one of the frosted snowmen dance across the table Dora laughs and then viciously bites his head off. It was then that Andromeda decides it is time for Dora’s nap.

While Andromeda is putting her daughter down for a nap Sirius takes the opportunity to escape. No matter what they say Ted and Andromeda deserved to have at least part of the day to themselves, and he can use a walk. When staying with his parents long walks were about the only thing that kept him sane. The walls of his childhood home were oppressive on the best of days. Dangerous on the worst. His cousin’s house was nowhere near the old neighborhood where his parents live, but the moment he’s gone a few blocks from the house he realizes how exposed he is. If anyone sees him it wouldn’t be hard to make the connection to the Tonks family. On his own he doesn’t have anyone to watch his back and it would be easy enough for a couple of people to drag him home. Would his father have any interest in forcing him home? Making him bow and scrape, making him swear an oath of fidelity?

“I’m not going back there,” he swears to himself, walking faster. He looks at each alley he passes, half expecting to see someone he should fear, half looking for a plan of escape. All he would need was a moment out of sight; no one would know to look for Padfoot once he transformed.

“Sirius?” At the sound of his name he turns, wand already raised and a disarming spell on his lips.

“Thought that was you.” Frank Longbottom looks curiously at his wand but shrugs. “Don’t usually see you on this side of town, mate. Enjoying your holiday?”

“It’s alright. Just stopped by to see a friend,” he lies. Fortunately, he has a lot of practice at lying. Frank is a nice enough sort, a year ahead of him in school. Rumor was he was all set for the Auror program after graduation. That didn’t mean that Sirius was about to trust him completely. He didn’t trust anyone completely except the Mauraders.

“Alice lives around the corner. We had lunch with the family. Her dad has to warm to me eventually, or at least that’s the hope. Not so pleased about the half muggle status, that one.”

“Screw him,” Sirius growls with more force than he meant. He is so tired of the hate against muggle-borns, half muggles, and his most hated word, ‘half breeds.’ His father was of the opinion that the only good werewolf was either a dead one or a vicious pet, and had talked at length during Tuesday night’s dinner about a need for more regulations to protect against monsters. His father’s definition of a monster is very different from his own.

“It’s important to Alice.” Frank was so mild-mannered it was sometimes a surprise that he was a Gryffindor. Then again Pete was pretty affable too. He’d seen Frank’s reaction, though, when a Slytherin was scaring a first-year Hufflepuff. Frank hadn’t been mild-mannered then. “He’s not a bad bloke, just set in his ways. Not like, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” Not like his family or the loony bin they kept marrying into. Still, he had no patience for any of it. It didn’t matter if he’d never met Mr. Fortesque, he already didn’t like the man.

They walk a bit farther, not talking of anything important until they reached a row of muggle shops and Sirius mentions stopping to pick out some gifts.

“A bit last minute, aren’t you Sirius?” Frank teases.

“Same way I get my essays done,” he says with a shrug. The truth is he spent as much time plotting his gifts as he did some of his most elaborate pranks, and he’d gotten gifts for his fellow Marauders before school had even started. Other than sending something to James’s parents they were the only gifts he had to worry about. Even in better days his parents had not held with gifts for Christmas. He’d be a prat if he didn’t at least have something under the tree for his cousins this year, though. Fortunately he still had some muggle money from a trip to muggle London he and James had gone on during the summer.

He returns to Andromeda’s an hour later with a cookbook for Ted by a muggle named Julia Childs that the shopkeep had assured him anyone who liked cooking would enjoy and a stuffed dog for the sprog. It was black and not unlike his own secret form, which amused him. His cousin was harder, but when he’d walked past an antique shop he’d found a little painting of an owl. It looked like the one Andromeda had when she was a girl; Sirius could remember visiting and seeing his cousin petting the bird, whispering to it softly. Bella had rolled her eyes. It was a muggle painting so it didn’t move, but Sirius thought Andromeda might at least appreciate the sentiment.

“Sirius Black what do you mean by vanishing for hours without even saying that you’re leaving?” Andromeda is every inch a Black when she appears in the hall just moments after he enters the house. Her jaw is firmly set, chin lifted at just the right angle to make it feel like she looked down her nose at him despite being half a head shorter. For a moment he is reminded of her mother, and then his own.

Shite.

“I thought you could use some time without an intruder around. Christmas Eve traditions and all that.” It had started snowing as he’d walked back from the shops. Sirius tries to distract himself by brushing the snow off one shoulder. Regulus had given him the same look that Andromeda was giving him now, just a few days ago when he’d said the only right side of any fight was standing against everything the family stood for.

“Great. Lovely. So I guess if my sister’s friends had seen you and decided to hex you into the new year it wouldn’t have mattered to me because at least I had a nice afternoon away from my ungrateful little cousin?” She glares at him in a way he hadn’t seen since he’d been seven and had used the essay she’d left in the study to make paper airplanes that had magically flown themselves.

“I wouldn’t tell anyone you let me stay here.” He’s had enough experience with Cruciatus to know that he would be able to keep at least that secret.

“You think that’s what concerns me?” she asks incredulously before her crossed arms fall to her side and she deflates. “Merlin, they did a number on us, didn’t they? Our family. Toujours pur but jamais fidèle. I was worried about you, Siri. You haven’t told me what happened but I know enough the guess. I’m not totally unaware of what’s happening with my sisters and their social circle.”

“I know how to take care of myself.” For a moment he hears the shadow of another argument, weeks earlier with Remus. They had been fighting about the full moon and returning to school early so they could be there for him. He tells himself it’s not the same thing.

“Of course you do. Another lesson we learned well.” Andromeda takes a step forward and brushes the snow off his other shoulder. “I know family is a pretty complicated word for both of us but you are my family Sirius. I care what happens to you.”

“Does it ever get easier?” He wants to ask if he would always hate them this much. If he would always carry around the hard ball of anger that sometimes threatened to choke him. Would he always feel the guilt in leaving Reggie behind, not even trying to stop him from becoming the son his father wanted? Would he ever stop mourning the family he never had? He has a hundred questions but doubts there are really any answers.

“I remember when I heard you’d been sorted into Griffindor. Auntie was so angry. There was talk of sending you to Durmstrang, but they decided against it because of the way it might look. The first time I saw you that winter you were in Zonko’s with your mate James, and you were laughing. I don’t know how you’d gotten permission to be there without your parents but you looked so happy. I knew then that the sorting hat had changed something that couldn’t be changed back. I think it’s already better. It doesn’t go away, we can’t change where we came from, but it’s better than what could have been.”

“I remember that trip. Mum thought the Potter connection could be useful.” The Potters were purebloods, and rich, but in every other way as different from the Blacks as it was possible to be. “You brought us ice creams after the joke shop.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t get to do that more often.”

“Mum would have hated knowing we spent any time together.” He’d missed his cousin, but there had always been an extra thrill knowing his mother would disapprove. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left without saying anything.”

“You’re wanted here, alright?” They don’t hug, not in their family, but Sirus has learned it from his mates and Andromeda from her husband. It is a quick hug, but heartfelt. Afterwards Sirius drops his packages off under the tree and finds that on the mantle there was now a fourth stocking, one with his name on it.

Christmas is a quiet day, or as quiet as it can be when a three-year-old has a newly acquired broom that hovers a foot off the floor. The stuffed dog he’s picked out, who somehow has been dubbed ‘Spot’ despite being solid black, has a place of honor on the broom and only falls off six times. The snow from the night before has left a fresh powder on the ground, and the afternoon is spent building a snowman that briefly joins them in an animated game of tag thanks to some clever wand work from Andromeda.

To say it is the best Christmas Day he’s ever had isn’t saying a lot, considering what Christmas is like in his family. It is more than a good Christmas, it is a good day. When he watches Dora feed her stuffed dog invisible hot chocolate he can’t help wondering what it would have been to grow up in a family that saw children as something other than an obligation to continue the family line.

“Would you care for a cup of chocolate that’s not invisible?” Andromeda asks once her daughter’s attention is drawn away from their ‘tea’ party. Ted is giving her hippogriff rides.

“Yeah.” He follows her into the kitchen, leaning against the counter while she melts a bar of Honeyduke’s finest into simmering milk. Moony would approve.

“I remember getting my first broom.” His hadn’t been a toy. His parents didn’t believe in toys.

“If memory serves you were six, and the first thing you did was try to stand up on it.” Andromeda laughs as she stirs the chocolate, adding vanilla and a pinch of salt.

“They locked it up for a month after that, until I could promise to be more respectful.” He’d only learned to be more careful, waiting until he was out of view before practicing loops and dives and quidditch moves. It had been his first taste of freedom.

“Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t met Ted. Would I have ever defied the family or would I just have accepted it as my lot? But I never wondered about you, Sirius. Worried, but never doubted that you were meant for something else.”

“You never would have stayed. You’re too good for them.”

The letter comes during breakfast on boxing day. Sirius is so focused on the red envelope that he doesn’t notice the owl at all. He’s been expecting at least a letter for three days now, and his only thought is to snatch the letter and get up to his room before it explodes in his mother’s amplified and shrill voice. No one else needs to hear the hate in her voice.

He is too slow, or the letter is faster than usual. He’s barely taken it from the owl and stood from his chair when it begins to shake. It grows in size, shaking and looking like a firework about to explode before it bursts open.

SIRIUS ORION BLACK YOU GREAT GIT WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU?

It takes Sirius a moment to realize that the shooting that fills the small kitchen is not his mother, but his best friend.

YOU HAVE NOT ANSWERED MY OWLS FOR THREE DAYS. I EVEN TRIED FLOOING TO YOUR HOUSE BUT THAT CREEPY HOUSE ELF OF YOUR MOTHER’S ONLY SAID THAT HER MISTRESS HAD GOTTEN RID OF YOU. I’M WORRIED PADFOOT. MUM AND DAD ARE WORRIED. RUMUS SENT ME AN OWL BECAUSE HE THOUGHT MAYBE WE SHOULD TRY GOING TO YOUR HOUSE TO SEE YOU.

“No.” Sirius stares in horror at the envelope as if it can hear him. Remus can’t go anywhere near Grimmauld Place. He’s only let James come once and that was bad enough but at least James comes from a wizarding family almost as old as the Blacks.

RUMUS IS STRESSED ABOUT YOU AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE’S LIKE WHEN HE’S STRESSED. IF WE DON’T HERE FROM YOU IN AN HOUR I AM SENDING HIM AN OWL BACK AND WE ARE GOING TO MAKE A PLAN.

A moment later the howler tears itself to pieces, the confetti burning like ash. The only thing left was the echo in his ears.

“I can’t let Remus go to Grimmauld Place.” He looks at Andromeda.

“Bloody git.” Dora waves a bit of pancake around on the end of her fork, apparently amused by the howler. “Great bloody git.”

“Those are not words for little girls, my love. They’re words for grown-ups who have to deal with problems.” Ted reaches over and picks Dora up from her seat, balancing her on his knee and distracting her with a floating grape. Sirius knows he should probably apologize, but all he can think about is Remus showing up at his parents’ door and them somehow seeing in an instant what it took him two years to figure out.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea for any of your friends, but at least if they’re looking for you it rules them out as anyone who knows where you are. It might protect them in the long run.” Andromeda stirs her tea carefully. “Remus is the quieter lad, isn’t he? The one with the nice manners.”

Sirius nods, afraid to open his mouth and say anything about Remus, afraid he might say too much and spill secrets that aren’t his to tell. It has taken months to recover from the Snape Incident. All he knows is that he has to stop any of his friends, but Remus especially, from confronting his parents. The things the Black Family would do if they knew they had a werewolf in their home were unspeakable. “I need to borrow your floo.”

“The floo powder is on the mantle where the stockings were. You’ll let me know if you’re not home for dinner, won’t you?” Sirius nods his promise.

“Your friends are welcome to tea. We’re having bangers and mash,” Ted adds supportively as Sirius carries his dishes to the sink.

“Padfoot play?” Dora asks as he leaves the kitchen. He hopes she won’t be too upset that he’s ignored her request.

A minute later he is in the Potters’ library, startling Fleamont Potter from his post-breakfast nap. A newspaper half covers his face but he pushes it away as he sits up. “Sirius my lad, what a relief. James will feel so much better when he sees you. Last I checked he was pacing the front hall.”

“I’ll go find him.” At least he hadn’t dashed off and done anything stupid; that was Sirius’s job. He doesn’t have far to go far; after walking through the library door he is tackled and might have fallen if he wasn’t so used to the surprise attacks of James Potter. This one involved a hug he couldn’t have escaped if he wanted to. He doesn’t want to.

“If I wasn’t so happy to see you Padfoot I’d punch you and then lock you in a small dark room. Where have you been?” James’ hair was messier than usual, standing on end where he tugged on it when he was nervous or frustrated. The fact that he was wearing shoes was alarming; when he was at home his feet were always bare, so he really was planning on going somewhere. Sirius hates thinking about where that place might have been.

“I’m alright, Prongs.” There is no person on the entire earth that he trusts more than James Potter. His reluctance to mention his cousin was not out of worry.

“Not one peep yesterday from you. Even first year you popped in to say Merry Christmas and last year you came for almost two hours after you got yourself kicked out of dinner. I kept my mirror with me all day yesterday and nothing from you. When I popped into your kitchen the house-elf said…”

“I left.” He shrugs as if it doesn’t mean anything.

“What do you mean, you left? Left the house on Christmas? Can’t imagine that made your mum happy.”

“I left a couple of days ago, actually, and I don’t give a toss what my mother thinks.” He looks down at his shoes, noticing that there was a scuff mark on the left one. “I’m not going back there.”

“What did they do?” His best friend’s voice sounds like fire. Sirius knows that James would go to war against the whole Black family without a single hesitation if he thought that they had hurt Sirius. It is the reason he keeps the worst stories to himself, to protect James. Remus knows more, whispered confidences in the black of night when neither of them can sleep. After all, Remus has his own monsters and knows something about enemies being bred into your blood.

“I’m not going to be one of them, and hate who they tell me to hate, and fight who they tell me to fight.” Rudolphus and Bella have matching tattoos on their arm. At first he’d thought they were a warped couple sort of thing, but then he’d seen the same mark on Narcissa’s finance, and the slithering edge of black ink on his father’s arm when his sleeve hitched up a little.

“Of course you’re not.” James smiles a little, just for a moment, before the smile fades. “Hold up, you said days ago. Where have you been since you left? Pete would have said if you’d been at his place and I know you haven’t seen Remus. Please tell me you haven’t done anything naff like sleep on a bench or take a room at Three Broomsticks.”

“I need to lie low for a bit. I am somewhere safe, I promise.” His mother’s threats ring in his ear, promising that no one that dared offer him sanctuary would be safe.

“You’re safe here.” James snakes a hand around his wrist, dragging him towards the back of the house. “Mum,” he shouts.

“It’s not about my safety.” When the kitchen proves empty James pulls him to the backdoor, through the snowy yard to the greenhouse that is always warm and humid no matter the weather. In the center of the space is a pond where lotus float. Euphemia Potter is kneeling beside her herb bed.

“Mum, Sirius showed up finally and he’s run away from home so he needs a place to stay. He can have the room next to mine, right? Dad can figure out how to handle the guardian stuff so you can sign his school papers and..”

“Prongs, stop. I just came so you didn’t do anything stupid like go to Grimmauld Place. I’m not staying.”

“Don’t be stupid, Pads, of course you’re staying. Right mum?”

“This is always your home, Sirius.” She stands with a grace that his own mother would never be able to emulate, no matter how many centuries of ‘good breeding’ have gone into molding her. Deep purple and gold robes flow around her. Indoors she’s just as apt as her son to have bare feet, but in the garden she wears leather sandals. “Monty and I have been worried about you, dear. It’s good to see that you’re safe.”

“I’m sorry for making you worry.” The last thing he wants to do is worry his friends or the Potters who are always so kind to him. Without the Potters he wouldn’t know what a real family is supposed to look like, or how lacking his own family really was.

“A mother always worries about her children.” When she touches his arm Sirius has to fight to remain stoic, torn between the wanting to break down and wanting to make a bitter comment that some mothers want nothing more than to eat their own young.

“See, Pads? Mum said you’re staying. Dad will agree and that’s everything sorted. The family barrister can send papers to your…”

“No.” If he lets himself listen to any more it will sound too much like a dream and not having it will hurt all the more. “You’re not listening to me, Jamie. I will see you in two weeks when we go back for term. I need you to let Remus know that I’m safe and that he’s not to go to my parents’ house under any circumstances ever. Let him know that I’ll be at school on Wednesday morning like I promised, okay?”

“Tell him yourself, Pads. You haven’t forgotten how to write a letter in the last week have you?” James stands between him and the door to the greenhouse, arms crossed and ready for a fight. “No, but I don’t have a way to send a letter. I couldn’t bring Freddie with me when I left.” Damn it, he misses his owl. It is the least of his problems, and it’sjust a stupid owl that he ignores too often when he is at school, but when he is home visiting the owlery is often the only good part of his day. No one in his family would deign to sit amoung the birds.

“Shit, I’m sorry.” James sighs. “I’ll write Remus, okay? Or you write to him and use one of our owls. He’s sent me three letters since yesterday and seeing the scrawl you call penmanship would probably do him good.”

“I’ll write to him before I go, alright?”

“Sure, as long as you mean that you’re going to go get your trunk so you can bring it back here. I was thinking we could transform the closet between our rooms into a lounge, maybe with a foosball table or something. Mum’s brill at things like that.”

“Damn it, Prongs, you’re not listening to me.”

“I’m listening, I’m just ignoring you being a dense pratt. This is your home.”

“My mother…”

“Your mother is a miserable bitch and you’re well rid of her. You can share my mum with me, she always wanted more kids and she and dad both love you.” James speaks with the confidence of someone who has always been certain of his place.

“You don’t understand, James. The things she would do if she found out you’d taken me in. The things she might set in motion. My family is full of fucking Death Eaters. My cousin...” But he doesn’t want to think about Bella and what she could do. What she’d hinted that she’d already done, the snake of her tattoo slithering around her wrist. He knew what she could do to someone she wanted as an ally, the echo of pain still in his bones as she tried to make him agree. The war was coming so much quicker than he’d realized. He would protect the people he cared about as long as he could.

“We keep each other safe, just like we’ve always done, Pads.”

“This isn’t trying to get out of detention when a prank goes wrong. I’m not going to risk any of my family coming after the people I care about.” He could still see, too clearly, the look in Moony’s eyes when he realized how close he’d come to attacking Snape on a full moon. If anything had happens Remus would be the one to suffer and it would have been his fault. He couldn’t let it be his fault again.

“So instead I’m supposed to just stand by and hope you’re okay? Do you know what it would do to me if anything happened to you?” James tugs on his hair.

“I’ll see you in two weeks, alright?”

“Padfoot…”

“It’s better if you don’t know where I am.” He’s been seventeen for almost two months, but won’t take his apparating test until spring like any other student. That doesn’t stop him from disapparating, but it did mean that he is a block away from Andromeda’s, instead of in her backyard, when he reappeared. It takes him a moment to get his bearings and to find his way to the house. By the time he does he’s shaking, and collapses on the back porch, using the last of his energy to change into Padfoot.

“Puppy.” He wakes to find Dora stroking his fur enthusiastically, Ted and Andromeda watching with varying looks of caution and amusement. Because it seems like the simplest option he spends an hour fetching sticks and racing through the snow, decimating the snowman they had made the day before and chomping on snowballs. When a cat crosses the back fence he doesn’t resist the urge to chase it; James has often remarked that if they ever came across McGonagall in her animagi form there would be some serious explaining to do. Chasing professors was not a good idea even if they were a cat at the time.

When it starts to get dark outside Ted tries to lure him in with the promise of something to eat, but he refuses. As tempting as it is to see if they would talk about him in his absence, it wasn’t fair and Andromeda would worry if he wasn’t back for tea. He’d promised, after all. Sirius slinks around the corner, waiting until he is sure everyone is inside the house before turning back. His jeans are soaked and his mouth is freezing from the snow he’s eaten, but an hour of running around and a nap have done him some good. He is able to walk into the house without feeling like the world is completely falling apart.

“Anyone with you?” Ted asks, poking his head out of the kitchen. Sirius shakes his head.

“Padfoot play?” Dora asks, her hair the same black color as his own. She’d changed it when they were playing outside, ironically wanting to match the dog.

“It’s bathtime, remember? And I’m sure Sirius is wanting a hot shower, considering the look of him.” Andromeda gives him the same speculative look she’d given a dog an hour ago until she was convinced that her daughter was safe playing with the mutt. “Your friend’s alright?”

“I think he’s mad at me.” James wasn’t mad, not really, but it was easier than saying that he was hurt by the secrets he wouldn’t share. He and James shared almost everything. “I’m going to go take that shower now.”

“I’ll let Ted know to start a kettle; you look like you could use some warming up from the inside too.”

The next morning he lets himself sleep in, and is still in his pajamas just before noon, making himself a bacon sandwich with leftovers from the breakfast he’d skipped. He’s just taken his first bite when someone knocks on the front door and Ted calls for him.

“See? I told you this was the logical place.” When Ted steps back Sirius can see a grinning James Potter in the doorway, a Gryffindor scarf wrapped around his neck. Beside him is Remus, not dressed nearly warm enough for the day. Crowded on the back of the porch is Peter.

“Yes, but ‘Padfoot’ and ‘logical’ aren’t usually things we say together.” Moony has a crease line between his eyebrows, looking Sirius over. He tries to smile, but it is a small one, his attempt at a joke falling flat. Sirius can almost feel the worry vibrating from him.

“If Sirius is trying to lay low maybe we shouldn’t be standing out here where anyone can see us?” From the way James steps forward suddenly it was clear that Pete had given him a friendly shove. Ted is smart enough to take a couple of steps backward, clearing the way for three-fourths of the Marauders to invade his home.

Sirius says the only thing that came to mind. “What the fuck?”

“I sent an owl to Remus. He agrees you’re being stupid.” James aims a drying spell at his feet.

“That’s not what I said, Prong. Don’t put words in my mouth.” The gloves Remus takes off look new, probably a Christmas gift from his parents. They were practical souls, and most of Moony’s gifts from them are the sort of things that Sirius takes for granted. He knows that new quills and gloves are not so easy to come by in the Lupin household, though. “I said I didn’t like the idea of you without anyone to watch your back.”

“I agreed with James about you being a git.” Peter grins. Ted closes the door behind him.

“Gee, thanks Pete.”

“You’re Ted, right? Nice to meet you. I’m James and I’m just here to relieve you of this annoying houseguest of yours. His bedroom is all ready for him.” James shakes Ted’s hand when it’s offered.

“Sorry about the invasion, Mr. Tonks, only Sirius does seem to need reminding about a promise he made. We’ll be out of your hair once we knock some sense into him.” Remus looks at him very carefully, and Sirius can almost read his mind. He can see the bonfire they’d had the first summer they’d been together, could hear the vow they’d made to always have each other’s backs. Marauders forever.

“Stay as long as you like, boys. I have some biscuits in the oven that will be ready in a little while, so when you’re ready come down for a snack,” Ted offers as he shakes hands with Remus and then Peter.

“Fresh baked biscuits? Maybe Padfoot does know what he’s on about, staying here.” Peter licked his lips. He’d been the one, second year, to figure out the secret of the ticklish pear that lead into the kitchens. The house elves loved him.

“I’ll take this lot upstairs so we don’t bother you.” He gives his friends a pointed look and heads up the stairs, trying not to think about the fact that the bedroom he’d been using suddenly feels so much more like home when all four of them are crowded inside. Remus is the one to cast a silencing charm, meaning he doesn’t have to keep his voice down when he speaks. “Damn it, Prongs, what part of our conversation yesterday didn’t you understand?”

“The part where you seemed to suddenly forget the last six years and think you’re a lone wolf like that prat first year who wouldn’t talk to anyone for the first week of school. No offense meant, Remus.”

“None taken,” Remus shrugs, sitting down on the trunk under the window. Peter has already sprawled out on the bed. James was pacing, like he often did when he was plotting a prank or coming up with wild schemes to get Evans to date him.

“It’s not the same.” He’d been terrified that first week after the hat had sorted him into what he’d considered the wrong house. His mother had sent him three howlers the first two days, and he knew that Dumbledore had gotten a howler as well. He’d never asked McGonagall if she’d gotten one; it was too embarrassing to even contemplate. He hadn’t wanted to get to know the boys he shared a room with, not when he was going to be moved in a matter of days. Surely someone would realize that he couldn’t be a Griffindor. Blacks were always in Slytherin.

He’d been scared of his family then, and he was scared of his family now. Maybe it wasn’t so different, but the threat of his family was worse than it had been six years ago, or maybe he was finally understanding just what the Black name meant. “It‘s not safe.”

“Neither was spending two years learning to be an animagus so you could spend full moons chasing after a werewolf.” Remus rubs a scar on his forearm that Sirius swears is fading a little every year. The fact that he hadn’t gotten a new scar in over a year is a victory that Sirius privately celebrated every morning after a moon.

“That’s different.”

“How?” Remus stares at him until he has to look away.

“So Wormy, how long do you think we can hang around the Tonks place before they kick us all out?” James plonks down on the bed.

“Well they’ve already put up with Padfoot for four or five days so their tolerance is pretty high. Might be able to stretch it a couple of days. A week at least if we find some chores to help with. Longer if everyone remembers to shower.” Peter glances at the door. “You think those biscuits are ready?”

“We could go check and let the man of the house know we’ll be crashing here for a bit.” James heads for the door, breaking the silencing charm as he opens it. Peter is swift to follow.

“Moony.” Sirius looks at him, hoping that he at least will understand. Moony, he thinks, understands what’s coming with the war more than the rest of the group. He knows at least some of what a family like the Blacks can do.

“We’re not leaving you alone, Sirius, no matter the risk. You’re ours.” Remus squeezes his hand as they stand in the doorway. “It’s going to be okay, Pads. We’ll figure this out the way we always do. Together.”

Sirius thinks maybe he’d like to stand in the doorway for a while, the warmth of Moony’s hand in his, but everyone else is downstairs and he still has to find a way to convince them all to go home.

“Puppy?” After she is done with her biscuit Dora slides off her chair and runs to the kitchen door.

“We can look, love.” Ted follows her, opening the door to reveal an empty back porch.

“No puppy,” Dora sighs, her lower lip sticking out. “Want puppy.”

“There was a stray dog in the yard yesterday. Dora quite enjoyed playing with him,” Andromeda explains to the boys at the table. “It was quite funny, actually. Sirius got her a stuffed animal for Christmas and the dog that showed up looked almost the same.”

“Black dogs are common enough,” Sirius comments, shooting a look across the table at James.

“Probably just a mutt,” Peter supplies helpfully, wincing when Sirius kicks him under the table.

“He’s probably in the doghouse now,” Remus arches one eyebrow as he looked sideways at Sirius. “He might not be very good at listening.”

“I hope he has a good home. He seemed to be such a nice dog.” Ted lures his daughter back to the table with another biscuit. She decides that Remus’s lap is where she wants to sit while eating it, and tugs at his sleeve until he picks her up.

“I’m sure he’s found a very nice home. Most dogs are clever enough to go where they know they’re loved.” James is smiling, most people might think he is making an idle comment but Sirius knows that look in his eyes. He was not playing fair.

“Maybe he’s not looking for a home right now, but is wandering for a bit.” Sirius looks across the table at James pointedly.

“He looked too well fed to be homeless, and despite the lack of collar he certainly wasn’t a matt. He had good pedigree, you could tell that by looking.” Andromeda, of course, has no idea of the second conversation that is happening right in front of her. Her comment is enough to makes James choke on his biscuit, though.

“He had pedigree, Sirius.”

“Sod off, Prongs.” He was going to give away at least one of their secrets if he wasn’t careful. Andromeda is clever, and while she’d been out of the family for years she’d been raised on subterfuge and lies.

“Prongs,” Dora repeats. Sirius is just glad that’s the part she has decided to mimic.

“We call him that because his head is pointed,” Sirius grouces. “Not much room for a brain up there.

“I got just as many OWLS as you did, you berk,” James fired back. It had been a matter of great amusement, the year before, that their score on their OWLS had been exactly the same. Peter had nearly tied them, but was short by one O. Remus had beat them all, of course, practically acing his exams. Only his potions score kept him from being perfect.

“I was having an off day.” He can’t keep from grinning, for a moment forgetting everything else as he slips into the familiar patter of fake insults. Almost two weeks without his friends has been a lonely experience.

“I swear I can’t take you two anywhere.” Remus rolls his eyes, breaking off a bit of his biscuit for the little girl on his lap. She seems enthralled with him, her dark hair lightening into an auburn. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Tonks, I’d say that they’re not always this bad but my mum taught me not to lie.”

“It’s Andromeda, please, and it’s good to see that Sirius has such support.”

“Whether he wants it or not.” James leans back in his chair and looks at the back door that leads to the yard. Sirius doesn’t like the look in his eye; his best mate is plotting something. “Speaking of, you don’t mind if we borrow a bit of your yard, do you? My parents have a tent we could borrow, don’t take up much space. We wouldn’t want to impose, and we can manage all our own food.”

“You’re not staying here.” For effect Sirius throws half of his biscuit at James’s head.

“Good, then you’ve decided to come home with me.” James calmly catches the treat and pops it in his mouth.

“James.”

“If you think this is the safest place of you then it’s safe enough for all of us,” Remus points out calmly. Sirius bites his lip hard enough to draw blood. He can’t argue the point without making it sound like he’s willing to put his cousin’s family in danger. He looks over at Andromeda, willing her to say something to derail the current conversation.

“I think a camp out in the backyard sounds like fun.” Sirius stares at her in shock. Damn it, that wasn’t what he was expecting.

“I’m sure they’re hoping you’ll join them.” Sirius looks away from the window, pretending he hasn’t been staring at the shadows around the campfire in the backyard. It’s dark enough that he can’t see much of their faces, but his mates are all sitting outside the tent and drinking bottles of butterbeer.

“They should be at home.” Remus actually enjoys spending time with his parents, and Peter seems happy enough to go home for the hols. James has the best parents it’s possible to have.

“They don’t seem to agree with you.” Andromeda sits on the edge of his trunk, her leg not quite touching his. “Ted wanted to come with me when I told mum and dad about being engaged. I wouldn’t let him, couldn’t trust that they wouldn’t lash out at him.”

“So you get it.” Their family is capable of a great measure of cruelty.

“I understand the fear and the desire to protect. I also know that the first place I went after I told them was to Ted’s flat and I didn’t leave for three days straight. I couldn’t bear to have him out of my sight. The first time I saw my sisters and they walked past me as if I didn’t exist he was the one that was holding my hand. When the only family member at my wedding was Uncle Alphard Ted promised that he would be my family until the day he died.”

“They’ve been my family since my first year at Hogwarts.” James was the first person to make him laugh, nine days into first term. Peter had snuck him food when the idea of going to dinner and facing a whole table of Slytherins whispering about him had been too much to handle. And Remus, who he’d judged as quiet and odd had hexed his cousin when she’d made a cruel comment in the hall. Since then they’d proven themselves a thousand times, while his blood family had only been belittling and hateful. “That’s why I have to protect them.”

“It seems like they have the same idea regarding you.” Andromeda looks out the window where the fire seems to be dwindling. The tent flap is open, a light burning inside. Last summer they’d taken the tent to the Quidditch World Cup. It had been brilliant. He and his friends had slept in bunk beds in one room while James’s parents had the second bedroom. Euphemia had painted mehndi designs on their hands that swirled in gold and green, proud that India had made it to the finals. Even Fleamont, who was secretly rooting for England, wore mehndi on his hands. “Something’s coming, Siri, and I know that’s frightening and it’s going to get bad. But I also know that turning our backs on everything good in our lives is exactly what the Black family would like to see. Your mother wants you to think you’re alone. To think that the only option you have is to be one of them.”

“I’ll never be one of them,” he swears fiercely.

“Of course you won’t.” Andromeda is full of surprises today; she kisses him on the forehead the same way he’s seen her kiss her daughter at bedtime, then gestures to the door. “You’re welcome here anytime you want, Sirius, but I think there’s somewhere else you’re supposed to be right now.”

“Yeah.” He’s not sure if this feeling of worry in his belly will ever leave him, or how long he’ll look over his shoulder for a member of his family. But maybe he can protect the people that matter better by being with them.

Tomorrow he’ll worry about his trunk. For now he heads down the stairs and out of the house to find that the fire has been dowsed with snow but the tent flap is still open. He closes it behind him, following the sound of talking to the same bedroom he’s used before.

“It’s about time.” James is on the top of one bunk, the bed beneath him empty but made up with blankets and a pillow.

“We saved you some chocolate.” Remus has the other bottom bunk; he’s never been fond of heights, not even something as mild as a top bunk. Flying classes first year had been miserable for him. He points to the chocolate frog on the pillow next to a bottle of butterbeer.

“My feet are freezing.” Peter is pointing helplessly at his feet with his wand, but he’s never been very good at warming charms.

“That’s what happens when you have a campout in the snow.�� Sirius finds warming charms easy, probably because he’s used them on Remus often enough. He’s always cold the morning after a moon. He helps out his friend, who grins down at him.

“Does this mean you’re done being a stubborn git?” James asks, hanging over the edge of the bed, his hair even more wild then usual thanks to the assist from gravity.

“It means I’ve accepted my doomed future of having to share a bathroom with you for all eternity, knowing you steal my shampoo and shed hair all over the place.” He catches the chocolate frog before it can hop away, viciously biting off a back leg.

“Good, because the kidnapping plan had a few snags in it and this is so much easier. Mum said she’d make a cake to celebrate and anything you want for dinner. Dad says not to worry about anything, he’s already talked to Dumbledore about the change in address. This is going to be brill.” James’ excitement was infectious, and despite his worry Sirius couldn’t help grinning back. No one had ever been excited to have him come home before.

James falls asleep as quickly as he does everything else, and within minutes there’s a soft snoring coming from above him. Peter had fallen asleep almost the moment his feet warmed up. Sirius rarely found sleep easy unless he’d completely physically exhausted himself first. He’s just about to contemplate turning into Padfoot, which sometimes helps, when there’s a whisper from his left side.

“I’m glad you don’t have to go back there, Pads. I’ve always dreaded holidays knowing you had a home like that.” Remus speaks softly but Sirius can hear the concern in his voice.

“It hasn’t been home for a long time. Maybe it never was.” He’s never been wanted by his parents, not in the way Euphemia and Monty so desperately wanted a son. He was an asset, like a land holding or the contents of the family vault, only with less value. “But it’s over now. I’m never going to see my family again.”

“You see your family every day, Pads. We’re right here.”

“Yeah, you are.” It didn’t matter if it was a tent, or a dorm room, or the guest room at the Potters that was secretly being redecorated to welcome him. It didn’t matter if the blood in their veins wasn’t the same. He had his family and his home, and hadn’t lost any of it when he’d walked away from Grimmauld Place. “G’night Moony.”

“Night Padfoot. Sweet dreams.”

Sirius doesn’t remember his dreams the next day, but he wakes up feeling rested and more relaxed than he’s felt in months.

“Your cousin has invited us all for breakfast before we go home.” James is already dressed and using a charm to clean his glasses.

“Good, I’m famished.” He dresses quickly, joining his friends as they dash across the yard, dodging snowballs that they levitate at each other. The kitchen smells like cinnamon and chocolate, and as they eat breakfast they make plans to come back for Sunday dinner. His mother can’t forbid him from spending time with his cousin now, and he’d like to get to know Ted better too.

Monty and Euphemia are waiting for them when they get home, welcoming him with hugs and a meal comprised of all his favorite foods. Remus and Peter stay for the first couple of days, the four of them taking shifts to make sure nothing happens. Other than a howler from his mother all is silent on the Black front. He almost doesn’t mind the howler because Freddie’s the one that delivers it and he knows enough to stay. James is with his mum in the greenhouse and doesn’t hear it. Monty’s there, though, and it’s the first time Sirius has heard him swear.

“They’re just words, son,” he says when the howler explodes. Sirius knows it’s not true, it’s more than that, but the hate is tempered by being called ‘son’ by someone who means it.

“Yeah.” He takes Freddie to the owlery to get settled and joins James and his mum in the greenhouse where they’re transplanting a bloodspot into a larger pot.

“Just in time, my dear. Do you mind holding a few of these leaves out of the way? They are too tender to use a freezing charm on them.” James has dug the hole and Euphemia has the roots supported. Between the three of them they get it settled into the new pot, the dirt anchoring it in place. Pleased, Euphemia steps back to admire their work. “Just right.”

“Just where it belongs,” James says, but he’s not looking at the plant. Sirius rolls his eyes and sticks out his tongue, but he can’t disagree. He didn't run away from home, he ran towards it.

#harry potter fic #sirius black #the marauders #marauder era fic #my fic #remus lupin #james potter #peter pettigrew #andromeda black tonks #nymphadora tonks #ted tonks #euphemia potter #fleamont potter #hints of remus/sirius #hints of james/lily #abuse tw

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consolationem-moved · 3 years

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𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑, 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐓. love was something eternal, for better or for worse, and she chose that life with him willingly. yet, with every confidence, andromeda recalls the initial bitter regret. she wasn’t prepared to lose her family, not yet. somehow, blood supremacy went over her head when she was first introduced to the politics of muggleborns in the wizarding world and what to do with them. she found it rather fascinating, being born into a single drop of wizarding blood, then making its way to the generation of muggleborns attending hogwarts. she believed that was why ted tonks grabbed her attention in the first place.

childhood was loving and affectionate, just as it should have been. andromeda’s kindness towards those even outside of her house made her stand out profusely, yet around her sisters, A FACADE WAS WORN. she recalls talking to muggleborns before, how interesting they were, and questioned their way of life. she supposed it was an eagerness to learn more. when her sisters came to her side, andromeda loathed how she suddenly had to talk down to them. she knew muggleborns like those she communicated with deserved more.

andromeda now nodded, sitting back into the chair she was comfortably on.

❛ when i married him, i thought i did. i think about it sometimes too, you know? ted asked me, dromeda? do you regret it? running away with him— i believe it was the best choice i’ve ever made, remus. ❜

continued from here

#ANSWERED.#moonshunned #DYN: REMUS LUPIN #THE FIRST WIZARDING WAR.

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quentinblack · 4 years

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Smoke and Mirrors

Chapter 5: Andromeda II - Wotcher! (link to full story on FF.net)

Featuring: Andromeda Black and Ted Tonks

Word Count: 3.5K words

Warnings: References to Abortion and Drugs

The foul stench of warm beer engulfed Andromeda as she made her way into the dingy lit pub. It was awfully humid at the best of times, but in the July heat it was unbearable. The Leaky Cauldron was more or less empty, save for a few middle-aged wizards who she expected scarcely left the place. The barkeep nodded in acknowledgement at her.

“What can I get ya?” he asked, as he smiled Andromeda noticed that more than a few of his teeth were missing.

“Oh. Sorry. I am just meeting a friend-

“JUST MEETING A FRIEND?!”

Ted’s booming voice gave her a shock. She hadn’t noticed him at all when she’d walked in. Andromeda absent-mindedly reached to sort out her hair, but then she stopped herself when she noticed what she was doing.

“Sorry Quincy, won’t be stopping for a drink today,” Ted said to the landlord. “Make sure you save some of that Weizenbier though. I’ll be back in with Dirk next week no doubt!”

“Look forward to seeing you, Ted. Can’t promise I’ll still have any left tho’, popular stuff that, them Bavarian goblins sure know how to brew a beer!”

“That they do,” Ted quipped, as he reached out for Andromeda’s hand.

“Come on, ‘Dromeda, not got all day,” he said as he guided her towards the exit that faced into the muggle street.

“I am still not sure that I approve of that nickname,” Andromeda noted to him.

“Well I’m not sure that I approve of that purple cloak you’ve got on!” he cracked back at her. “You can’t go prancing around Southend in that in the dead of summer!”

Andromeda’s heart stopped.

“But you said…you promised that you would bring me a muggle dress to wear, Ted!”

She couldn’t believe it. She was going to look like an absolute idiot. The muggles would all be staring at her.

“Oh bugger! I did, didn’t I?” Ted said as a very serious and guilty look swamped his face.

Andromeda was crestfallen. It was the first time she was going to meet Ted’s parents and she was so very desperate to make a good first impression.

“I will look like such a fool, Ted.”

“You would indeed… it’s just as well I didn’t forget to bring you a dress then, isn’t it?” he chortled, before laughing loudly at her.

Andromeda felt her blood boiling. She hit him playfully on the arm over his denim jacket.

“Ted Tonks! You are such a... such a…

“Devilishly good looking quick-witted chap?” he quipped, before grabbing her gently by the waist as she went to hit him again. She saw his green eyes smiling at her, before he closed them and kissed her softly on the lips like he’d done on many occasions over the last few months.

“I was going to say scoundrel,” she said at the end of their brief embrace.

“Scoundrel’s good too,” Ted replied with a grin on his face, before he began crossing the road.

“Where are you… that sign over there says the nearest train station is that way. I thought you said that we were going to get there the muggle way?” Andromeda asked, pointing in the complete opposite way to where Ted had begun walking.

Ted smirked.

“We are getting there the muggle way. No trains though!” he said, as he continued to stroll down the street, before stopping abruptly in-front of a red car. He slapped his hand on the bonnet. “What’d you reckon then, Drom? Nice motor, ain’t it?”

Andromeda felt a lump in her throat. “You. You cannot mean that… that

“Ford Cortina Mark II. Finest piece of totty to ever come out ah’ Dagenham. Brand new. Or so me old man said. Surprise present for me 17th birthday. I told him not to of course. Soon enough be able to apparate everywhere anyway, but he insisted on getting me a car. Could hardly turn him down could I?”

Ted reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a pair of keys, then put them into the door on the left hand side and opened it, indicating for her to get in.

“Come on, ‘Dromeda. I told Mum and Dad we’d be there at one!”

“But Ted. Travelling by train is one thing, but in a… in a car?”

“You’re not scared are ya?!” he asked incredulously. She was. She was very scared indeed.

She had read all about the muggle contraptions which were widely considered death-traps with wheels. The Daily Prophet was always reporting on new stories of witches and wizards narrowly avoiding getting run over and such forth. Muggles were awful at driving them, far worse than even the clumsiest of broom riders or carpet flyers – and there was a flying carpet crash or incident at least once a fortnight. In some circles there were even murmurs that the Ministry should put an outright ban on them.

“You’re welcome to get the train if you want, love. Good luck getting there without me though!”

Andromeda huffed and puffed, but eventually relented and got in the passenger side. The inside of the car was one of the most confusing things she had ever encountered. There must have been almost a dozen different nobbles in the car, with numerous symbols and numbers that made absolutely no sense to her whatsoever.

Ted got in on the driver’s side and after a brief look at a map he revved the engine, thus beginning her first of many forays in muggle vehicles.

~ ~ ~

Andromeda was starting to regret her decision not to just get changed in the back of Ted’s car – he had promised to get out and not to look and it wasn’t that she didn’t trust him, but she felt embarrassed getting undressed in the back seat of a car.

The smell of fried meat and pancakes wafted in from the Little Chef restaurant and flooded the humid cubicle. It was one of those moments where you questioned everything that had happened in your life to lead up to that moment. She was getting changed into a loud muggle dress in a dingy toilet cubicle in a muggle service station, which was a weird sort of complex of petrol stations, toilets and restaurants which were strategically stationed at various parts of the muggle motorways.

It seemed quite sad that such was the struggle of transportation for muggles - that whole businesses operated around them having to stop for food or toilet breaks in the middle of travelling somewhere. You didn’t need to stop for a toilet break when getting a port key or using the Floo network – that’s for sure!

Andromeda opened the door after squeezing into the dress and stared at herself in the mirror by the sinks. It was almost like an out of body experience. She was certain that the person looking back at her was herself, but at the same time she knew that it simply couldn’t be. The muggle dress that Ted had picked out for her to wear made her look, well, like a muggle.

The dress, which Ted had quipped was “Slytherin green” was in-fact a much brighter green than Salazar’s favoured dark emerald. It was a very bright green, like the zest of a lime, with a bright white trim around the collar and the bottom of the sleeves – it almost made her feel like a key-lime pie. It was a far brighter shade of fabric than Andromeda would ever willingly wear, but perhaps what was the most disconcerting was how short a cut the dress was. It fell a few inches above her knee, which, especially given her lack of tights, by her Mother’s strict standards was nothing short of scandalous.

She stared into the mirror expecting, or maybe just hoping that eventually she would feel a bit better about herself, when suddenly a stranger tapped her on the shoulder.

“Oh my god I love your dress, hun! You look rocking, girl! Where did you get it?” said the muggle woman, who Andromeda guessed was roughly her own age, if not a few years older. She had fair skin, with even fairer hair and was wearing the wackiest dress Andromeda had ever seen. It was purple, but it was also orange and red and yellow – it was enough to give you a headache just looking at it.

“Sorry I err… it was a present, from a friend, you see,” Andromeda said nervously, wondering what her Mother would think if she knew she was talking to not just a muggle-born wizard, but a proper full-on muggle girl.

“Ah, well you tell that friend they have great taste! Say, sorry if I’m wrong, but you look fairly liberal with a dress that short. Here, take a flyer!”

Andromeda took the leaflet, mumbled a slight thanks and looked down and it as the stranger scurried away.

OUR BODY – OUR CHOICE!

On the 27th October our elected politicians will make a decision on whether WE have the right to legal abortion.

We’re marching in London on SUNDAY JULY 30TH

Will you be there? Remember – WE SPOKE out about the right to contraception and THEY HAD to listen!

Make sure YOUR VOICE IS HEARD!

Andromeda really wasn’t sure on what the general consensus of contraception and abortions was in muggle quarters.

Contraception was easy enough – it was a simple spell that was readily available and easy to learn for any teenage wizard worth his salt. It had been around for centuries and whilst it was a little controversial – the vast majority of the pureblood men and politicians who opposed it were all likely using it and cheating on their wives anyway.

Abortion though, well, it was fair to say that certainly was a bit of a taboo subject in the Wizarding world, especially among pureblood families.

It was quite difficult for a lot of pure-bloods to get pregnant in the first place these days, which her mother put down to inbreeding – and in years gone by she had never missed an opportunity to make snide remarks about her sister-in-law, their Aunt Walburga, who had married her cousin, Uncle Orion.

In the more recent history however, her Mother liked to keep a low profile at Black family gatherings. It was one thing to have married your cousin, but it was another thing altogether to have the shame of your firstborn daughter having an abortion at 16.

It was never publicly revealed which Slytherin boy had impregnated her sister, but Andromeda certainly had a few candidates in mind. It was probably Yaxley – that was certainly the most popular rumour, but there was no guarantee that it wasn’t Lucius or even Thorfinn Rowle.

Andromeda even suspected that such was Bellatix’s promiscuity that perhaps even she herself did not know who it had been. But what she had known was fury like nothing she had seen before. Their mother had been incredulous – and their father, well, Andromeda had never before seen him so disgusted at someone who wasn’t a muggle or a blood traitor.

“Wow! Look at you! Barely even recognized you and what’s that, have you grown legs? Consider me impressed,” said Ted, as he smirked. He hid it well, but Andromeda did not fail to notice his eyes lingering on her legs for longer than a momentary glance.

“I shall take that as a compliment,” Andromeda said, biting her lip as she got back into the car.

“Imagine what your family would say if they could see you right now! Where did you tell them you were going today?” Ted asked as he drank from his bottle of Tizer.

“I told Mother I was meeting a friend, not a lie by any means. I told Cissy where I was really going and who I was really meeting though of course.”

“You’re gonna be in the right shit if you ever fall out with her! The stuff she’s got on you…”

“Why would we ever fall out? She is my little sister! We tell each other everything Ted, we always have done. You know what Bellatrix is like. Cissy and I always had to stick together! I am not sure that she entirely approves of our err… courting… but she would never tell Mother, Father or Bellatrix about it. Besides, like I said, she tells me everything too. I know all about her little love affair with Fabian Prewett.”

“Well, if you’re sure you can trust her,” Ted said nonchalantly as he turned on the car radio and flickered around with it a bit.

A slow, brooding guitar melody got under way, before the thundering sound of crashing upbeat drums kicked in.

“Well that’s ironic. Fitting song for us, I reckon,” Ted remarked.

I SEE A RED DOOR AND I WANT IT PAINTED BLACK

NO COLOURS ANYMORE I WANT THEM TO TURN BLACK

I SEE THE GIRLS WALK BY DRESSED IN THEIR SUMMER CLOTHES

I HAVE TO TURN MY HEAD UNTIL MY DARKNESS GOES

“Cracking band, The Stones,” he said, strumming one hand on the dashboard. “Got nicked on drugs charges the other week too, helluva story that. Imagine that. Laying in ya’ cell and Keith Richards and Mick bloody Jagger walk in. Christ.”

“Drugs charges?” Andromeda asked. “I do not understand.”

“Drugs are illegal substances. You can get arrested for buying or selling them on. Not too sure I can think of a wizarding equivalent.”

“What do these drugs do exactly if they are illegal?”

“Well, some of them are a bit like alcohol I s’pose. Bring you up, take you down. You know liquid luck, right?”

“Well, I have read about it, yes.”

“Yeah, exactly, read about it. Incredibly rare. Incredibly expensive stuff. Even a posh young witch like you’s nevva come by any…”

Andromeda flushed slightly at being called a “posh” witch.

“Right so with these drugs though, you can get a similar experience to Liquid Luck for what the average man earns in a few hours work. A lot of people just do them casually for a bit of fun now and then, but some people get proper addicted to some of them. End up ruining their lives over ‘em.”

“Oh. That sounds awful,” sighed Andromeda.

“Yeah,” agreed Ted. “But the old bill only went and busted Keith’s gaff didn’t they? They turned up at the house and found everyone high as a kite! Caught Jagger with a bit of speed, not that bad really. Charged Keith for letting people smoke cannabis in his house, what a load of nonsense. Harmless stuff that is” he said, shaking his head and looking annoyed, then he started laughing. “That’s not the best bit though! You know how the plod reckon they know they were all high? Well, they reckon that Jagger’s missus was wearing nothing but a fur rug when they turned up. A fur rug, ha-ha can you imagine them walking in and finding that?”

“That does sound like quite the shock. That poor girl,”

“They’ve got to be careful though, they have. Newspaper reckons that one of the other guys there, not in the band, just some random toff, well they reckon this bloke had a load of heroin on him. That’s proper dodgy stuff that is.”

“It is?” Andromeda asked curiously. “What is it?”

“Proper nasty stuff. One of the most addictive drugs out there. You ever see a homeless person off their rocker, they’re probably on smack. Ruins lives that stuff does. You get someone hooked on that – they’ll do just about anything for you to get another hit of it.”

~ ~ ~

Southend High Street was in many ways much like Diagon Alley. There was a vast array of smells, sounds and sights to ensnare one’s senses, with an endless stream of adults and children alike bustling around all of the shops. Whilst it was alike in that sort of sense – it was also in just as many ways completely different, it was almost like being on another planet, such was the contrast.

“There ya go!” Ted said, as he thrust a strange, yellow ice cream which had what looked almost like a little brown stick pointing out of the middle into her hand.

“Thank you, but err, what is it may I ask?” she enquired.

“That is the finest ice cream you’ll get in the country, love. Lemon ice. It’s sort of like a mixture between ice cream and sorbet. Rossi’s finest! With a chocolate flake, Cadbury’s of course! No idea why they call it a 99 though, they’re only a half crown each. Could buy like 8 of them for a pound.”

Andromeda took a slight lick, then a nibble and she did have to admit it was very nice indeed, although in the summer heat she found it was melting rather rapidly.

“I will never understand muggle money,” she sighed.

“Probably for the best anyway. Rumour is they’re getting rid of half crowns soon anyway! Mental if you ask me,” he snorted indignantly.

“Right well,” he pondered whilst looking out into the crowd of people ahead of them, whilst intermittently slurping big chunks of his own lemon ice. “Dad said they’d meet us outside Keddies at 1 o clock. Now by my watch that should be just about…

“Wotcher!”

Andromeda jumped slightly as Ted’s father popped out from out of nowhere and slapped his hand on Ted’s shoulder. He was slightly shorter than his son, as well as slightly rounder, but there was certainly a strong resemblance there. At a guess she would have said he was about 40.

“Alright, Dad!” Ted hollered, as he embraced his father warmly, being careful not to spill any of his ice cream on his father’s shirt. Andromeda had now spotted a slightly younger and slightly slender looking women, with dark brown hair standing alongside Ted’s father, who she assumed was Ted’s mother.

“Mum, Dad, meet Andromeda…”

“Wotcher,” his Dad said to Andromeda, as he pulled out his big hand and gave hers a firm shake. Andomeda offered a faint hello in reply. “Robert Tonks. But everyone calls me Bobby. This is my wife, Agata…”

“It is pleasure to meet you, Andromeda,” she said, in a vaguely Eastern European accent that Andromeda could not quite pick out.

“Teddy has told us so much about you. You are even more beautiful than he said you were.”

Andromeda flushed slightly at the thought of him telling his parents that he thought she was beautiful. She had to think fast to deflect away from it.

“Teddy?” Andromeda asked sarcastically at Ted. She had never heard of him being used by that name before. He blushed slightly. Ted’s father ushered them to start walking north and they continued their conversation as they trekked through the high-street.

“I call him Teddy ever since he was little boy. He was Mummy’s little teddy bear,” Agata teased gently. Ted shot her a hideous look filled with embarrassment.

“Oh don’t you worry, Andromeda. I’m sure there’s plenty more he’s kept quiet from you. We’ll fill you in on all of the secrets!” Robert said, winking once at Andromeda and then at Ted, who shot him a look that was halfway between anger and fear. “I hope that ice cream’s all you’ve eaten, Ted. Corr. Me and your mother taking you out for lunch with your missus and you’re on the ice creams already! What are ya like ehh, son?”

“You know what they say, Dad. Like father, like son!” Ted shot back.

“You calling your old man fat?” Robert scoffed incredulously.

“I’m not callin’ you skinny!” Ted joked.

“Bloody cheek! ‘Ere Andromeda he’s only showing off cause you’re here. Bet your parents don’t let you talk back to them like that, ehh?” Robert said, sneering at his son.

“Well… err no. Not quite,” she replied.

Ted and his father seemed to be exchanging in good natured banter, not uncommon to see between fellow pureblood students, but the idea of a parent and son or daughter talking to each other like that was a very alien concept to her. The Black family were all about respect, well, when Bellatrix wasn’t involved she supposed.

“Do you like seafood, Andromeda?” Agata asked her.

“Yes, I do quite like fish I suppose,” Andromeda replied politely.

“Well that is perfect. We take you to best seafood restaurant in all of Southend,” Ted’s mother said proudly, as they finally reached the end of the high-street and caught a glimpse of the sea-front. The tide was in and the crisp, blue waves were shining in the distance.

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homenum-revelio-hq · 4 years

Photo

Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Midge!

You have been accepted for the role of ANDROMEDA TONKS with the faceclaim change of Gemma Arterton! We really enjoyed how the old prejudices come out with your Andromeda, all while trying to combat them. We think it’ll be really interesting to see how she fits within her role in the Order, especially since she’ll be connected to old family. So excited to have you as part of the roleplay!

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME & PRONOUNS: Midge ( she / her )

AGE: 28

TIMEZONE: EST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: It’s pretty solid - I am generally around to plot on mobile throughout the day and while my job can be very demanding at certain times of the year, I still am able to post a few times a week.

ANYTHING ELSE: ( Triggers ) Rape, incest. [edited for clarity]

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Andromeda Cassiopeia Tonks ( nee Black )

AGE: Twenty-nine

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: CIS Female ( she / her ). Heterosexual. While Bi-Curious, Andromeda has never explored her sexuality fully.

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Slytherin

ANY CHANGES: I would love to use Gemma Arterton, if possible!

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY: Scorpio ( Sun ). Scorpio ( Moon ). Taurus ( Rising ).

A sun in Scorpio and ascendant in Taurus, Andromeda does often find difficulty understanding how she is perceived by others. In a position where rubbing people the wrong way was never much of a worry of hers, she often presents herself as materialistic and overly self-involved. While materialism is something she is mindful of ( finding comfort through her means being something she does strive towards ), this is not her driving force.

Her Sun being in Scorpio means she has a fundamental urge to get to the bottom of things, which can at times lead her to be manipulative or power-hungry, but it is from a place of intense passion for authenticity, real intimacy, and the truth. Andromeda is driven to set herself apart from others, often through her close relationships and long-term partnerships. Her desire for marriage was not only born out of a moment of heated vitriol to her family, but also in the pursuit of sustaining the connection she felt with Ted in the most lasting manner she could think.

Her Moon represents her emotional self: intense, passionate, and a bit dramatic. With an eye for a bit of a show, she still is inclined to keep her more intense and darker emotions private and has a hard time truly letting people in. Trust is hard-fought with her, and while she is very perceptive this sometimes manifests in suspicion and even controlling tendencies. The through-line of Andromeda’s personality is that she craves intimacy, and while it takes effort to get to the core of her it is upon being truly known she finds herself most fulfilled.

Dromeda is extremely practical, she is reliable and deliberate, giving off the impression of someone who is sensible ( though sometimes, extremely, stubborn ). Through her insightful intuition, Andromeda excels not only in her career but her obsessive tendencies make for someone who can build out a life for herself. She avoids “ beating around the bush ” where she can, and as a result can come off as harsh or intrusive. Being as intuitive to others as she is, she also heavily relies on communicating through body language or if the relationship allows, physical affection.

Ultimately, Andromeda can be very internal even when present with her own deeply intuitive and feeling self. Run through with a stubborn nature and desire to use her mental capacities to achieve her own personally set goals, she is ultimately a loving and devoted person to those she allows past the moments of discernment. As a result she’s always very aware of any who come into those people’s lives, utilizing her scrupulous nature to ensure that what she holds dear remains safely guarded.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY: ( TW: Mention of child death )

It is their cousin who tells them his sister died.

Not much older than Cissa, Iris died before she could even get a place on the family tree. Aunt Lavinia sits by a window and while her eyes are transfixed on the glass, Andromeda somehow knows she is not looking at anything that is outside. The house is quiet, save for Evan occasionally tugging at the cat’s tail just to hear it hiss. Normally Dromeda would tell him to stop, normally she would start pulling his hair so he could understand how it felt. But normally he did not have a dead sister so she sits with her hands politely folded in her lap.

In any case, she has a question to ask.

" Why? "

" How? "

The second question comes rushing from Bella.

They do not receive any answer right away, a pinch from Mother and a look from Father bars any more words from leaving their lips the rest of the visit. They get their answer at home before bed, Mother and Father sits them down in front of a window. Aunt Lavinia’s eyes must still be looking at but not out the window in her own home, Dromeda thinks while her too-wide and observant eyes strain to study Mother’s face.

As usual, it comes back to those creatures called Muggles. The same who burn witches and wizards alive, the same who beat Andromeda’s relatives and stoned them to death. Those evil beings who destroy everything and made Wizard-kind ashamed of their powers. Mother tells Bellatrix and herself of a new heinous act. They sneak into nurseries of the most innocent babies with their special, magical blood and pierce their soft, sweet skin with their teeth. They drink and drink until the baby stops breathing. They take all that is special from the child to pass on to their own offspring, to make those mudbloods look and speak as they do. They do it to infiltrate, to feed on more, to destroy every bit of goodness in the world.

( Aunt Lavinia’s baby is dead because of muggles - she was killed by a greedy, horrid monster. )

Mother tells her to stop clutching at her as she walks her back to her bedroom. She does her best, straightens her back and balls a small fist at her side - she stops holding Mother’s hand and instead tries to hold her own. It does nothing to stop her heart from racing. Once in bed, she counts the footsteps of Mother’s graceful stride until she knows she is alone. Until she knows she can move from her bed without being punished. Andromeda's less-than-graceful feet fumble from sheets and scramble to the ground. Frantic steps carry her toward the nursery. The door is cracked, and that is concerning.

It takes all of her courage to push through.

She expects to find a horned creature with long fangs hovering over her sister’s crib - instead she finds Bella laying on the floor beside it. With only a look exchanged in recognition, Andie joins her and is comforted in the thought Bella does not mind when she holds her hand. No matter how hard she squeezes.

Without any words the two sisters resolve themselves to be the protectors of the youngest from those who would wish to prey on her.

This memory begins to dull at age eleven. She watches a boy from across the Great Hall with mild curiosity, and his whole body moves as he laughs.

“Filthy mudblood,” is sneered from somewhere down the table. Instinctively, Andromeda reaches for Bellatrix’s hand.

( How odd, she thinks as she spots him later, he doesn’t seem to have fangs at all. )

She’s thirteen by the time they are formally introduced, her upbringing does not allow for her to be anything less than polite. At least, this is what she tells herself as she engages in conversation. He tells him his name is Ted and Andromeda spends the night thinking of how it felt when they clasped hands.

They talk, confined by isolated areas and the moonlight. Out of shame at first, perhaps. But there are some things Andromeda comes to find she only wants the moon sharing with her, with him.

Later ( in secret, away from her sisters’ prying eyes ), she’ll trace the veins in his wrist and she thinks she can feel the blood beneath begin to warm. How could it be thick, how could it be muddy - she thinks. His blood, and a burgeoning feeling becoming increasingly harder to ignore is as pure as anything she’s ever touched. Soft and warm when she’s nestled beside his beating heart, soft and warm even when she’s not.

( He’s not dirty, she thinks. Her family might be the one that is wrong. )

She’s lost to them long before they realize, long before she herself has accepted the truth. Ted holds one half of her, she believes, reserving some part that has listened to the lessons taught by her parents. Bellatrix’s infatuation of her own dalliance grows, a man who is allowed to eat at their table and handled their most prized heirlooms. He is the one who is unworthy, he is the one who poses the greater threat to everything important. ( There are bigger problems, she reasons, than a simple affair. )

Pregnancy brings on horrid morning sickness, and a slap that rings in her ear to this day, if she listens closely enough. “ Dead to us, ” they say. But offer a gift in the wake. As she spills out into the night air she finds herself gasping, as though she had resurfaced, as though she has just been saved from a watery grave.

( She stops by Cissa’s room, hoping to salvage at least one piece ).

Years of playing protector, vanquisher of the monsters under the bed, come full circle on her own. Nymphadora is born without the usual pomp and circumstance she has known in such occasions, but love pours from her quickly enraptured by strong lungs unabashedly wailing into the night air. Born able to achieve whatever she would like. That’s what she tells her, whispered promises like the exchange of vows shared with Ted before.

( She tries to ignore the Daily Prophet’s proclamations of anything else ).

A life is built, with difficulty and with trial and error ( how was she to know washing machines were to work like that? ) She is happy, she thinks, after years of being told such pursuits are foolish or secondary. She can protect them, she can keep them just isolated enough to not call any attention their way. There’s an effort to bring them closer to the fold but Andromeda balks at such a concept. ( Albus Dumbledore can not be trusted, she implores. Men with such power rarely care for their pawns at play ).

And still the part of her remains. The way certain light catches and she can feel those around her stiffen ( She looks so much like her, doesn’t she? ) The part of her which sharpened fangs in duels with Bellatrix left idly twiddling her fingers. It’s relentless, the tide. All the reasons why her job suits her. All the best, she thinks, to keep some things separate.

( She was told, once, about the myth behind her name. The Chained Woman. Andromeda was never asked her opinion, or so it’s said. Perhaps she only knew better to keep it to herself. )

OCCUPATION:

Unspeakable in the Ministry of Magic. A niche for ancient artifacts and interest in history allows for her attention to be drawn to the mysteries that keep magic interesting. Andromeda enjoys her job, finding it satisfying an itch she oftentimes could feel ashamed of ( if she spent much time thinking about what compels her, that is ). It is with the understanding of the level of access such a position has given her that she found herself acting as informant to the Order in the first place, and not necessarily because she felt any good will towards the movement of radicals. Andromeda isn’t compelled to trust the Ministry, exactly, nor is she inclined to leave her trust with men recruiting children to war. Her loyalty has always been a closed circle, stuck to a desire to move forward and a need to provide for her family.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

Andromeda is more inclined to believe that the Ministry and actual authority would have the means to bring about the end of the war, but with the shift of tide she understands that such measures are a necessary evil. For however far removed she has been from the Black Family Tapestry for the time she’s been married, Andromeda still remembers what it was like to host Voldemort for dinner parties as Bellatrix’s obsession for him grew. She is of a unique group who understood what was happening long before the Daily Prophet began their war correspondence.

That being said, Andromeda also knows of the ambition of man in general. Whispers of a vigilante group were met with indifference at first, she was ( perhaps misguidedly ) indignant at the idea of a select few taking matters into their own hands, let alone the rumors that some were being recruited right out of school? Her opinion on the group as a whole has only slightly softened since a few loved ones got involved, most notably Sirius and now Ted. Accepting the reality of the threat they are faced with comes with the ( somewhat begrudging ) acceptance compromises must be made.

SURVIVAL:

To put it bluntly, survival is everything to Andromeda. Above all else she is a true Slytherin and will do whatever it takes to survive, the caveat being that this extends to her family. Andromeda, though certainly affected by her upbringing in prejudice and violent bigotry, has not been indoctrinated in the same way. However, a certain edge to her allows for more than a few people to draw the direct line of understanding she is cut of the same cloth as Bellatrix Lestrange. While Bella found herself perverted past recognition to her devotion to the cause and her “master”, Andromeda made conscientious decisions to be as self-possessed as possible. This includes a willingness to play coy with the war effort that stands to protect her way of life.

Because, and this is very important, Andromeda thinks herself above it. She does not always draw a direct correlation to the suffering of others to what could become of her, because in Andromeda’s mind she will simply not allow it to happen. She knows she will be ruthless when it comes down to it, and tries to maintain a certain amount of plausible deniability when it comes to moments in which she is directly associated with the war.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Ted is, above everything else, the love of her life. She would have moved them to another country if she had her way but they settled on a cottage by the coast. They have fundamental disagreements and while there are times when he is met with exasperation on her end Andromeda has always liked the challenge he presented to her. A certain recklessness to give himself over to a cause rather than be content with the life they have stolen away offers a host of issues she would rather avoid; and it is in part due to this reasoning she doesn’t always share her own passing along of details. Ultimately, however, everything Dromeda does is for Ted, for their family.

Andromeda carries with her an adolescence of her family’s social engineering, which means she has connections in various places ( some she isn’t the quickest to acknowledge ). I think she finds herself drawn to the other members of her family who have been disowned, or even the women around her year who she recognized herself in. Which is to say nothing of the particular status she has achieved as an Unspeakable. Indifferent to status ( possibly as a result of it always being given to her ), Drom certainly knows how to use it.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: I am a huge sucker for Tedromeda, to be perfectly honest. But at the end of the day I will write with wherever there is chemistry and am always looking for fun avenues to explore!

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?:

There is a lifetime of prejudice which Andromeda needs to consistently unpack and confront ( and, as is the way of someone who grew up as incredibly privileged as she did, she is not always willing to do the work ). In many ways, hers is the story of triumph of love over the built-in bigotry that poisoned her home. In practice, it is much trickier. For as much as Andromeda knows what her family is now, there are still fond memories she holds dear. For all the horrors she knows that have been perpetrated in the name of purity, she often finds herself subject to the conditioning she was raised on.

Andromeda was taught, young and often, through the various state-sanctioned ( and family approved ) propaganda pieces to fear and resent anything that would be seen to be an outside, infiltrating force. She does attempt to give her daughter a more objective education of the world around them, though this is made increasingly difficult with the way the war seems to be going. Fear does things to people, she knows more than most, but there is a lack of malice in her heart.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?:

Honestly, I’ve been keeping my eye on this roleplay for some time and the stars just aligned in terms of my schedule opening up and a role that I wanted to play around with! Andromeda is fascinating to me because of all her contradictions, as well as a major resistance to actively take part in a war which she could potentially play a role in. I think the natural tension between her and former family members could also lead to a very interesting dynamic as we move forward!

PLOT DROP IDEAS:

I am open to going with the flow and love organically plotting, but I think Andromeda’s position at the Ministry / her being an informant to the Order could really challenge her laissez faire attitude when it comes to the war in general. Along with the building tension she has in her own home, and her desire to keep her family safe above anything else, it would be interesting to explore the boiling point of where that all comes to a head. Passivity has no place when she has a husband actively partaking in the war effort, and when the outcome could potentially call into question his safety she might have to fully establish herself as a combatant against what she was raised in.

ANYTHING ELSE? I don’t think so!

#homenumaccepted #harry potter rpg #hp rpg #marauders rp #marauders rpg

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bisexualharrypotter · 5 years

Note

Andromeda and Ted knew each other, of course. They went to the same school in the same grade. They shared some classes over the years. But they didn't really know each other in a friendly sense. Not until 6th year when a 7th year started a Queer Wix Association and bi Dromeda and demia trans Ted both stopped by to check it out. Their meeting was short and they were awkward with each other, yet drawn to getting to know each other more. It didn't take long for them to become inseparable.

The 7th year is a Ravenclaw so of course they ask people to do short presentations on any queer topic they like at the beginning of their bi-weekly meetings. Ted does one on theories about all the founders being trans (his favorite supporting evidence being that all of their names alliterate like his). The next week Andromeda does one on three centuries of wixen who challenged queerphobia in pureblood society (because continuing one’s pureblood line generally lends itself to upholding amotonormativity, heteronormativity, and cisnormativity). Of course they approach one another after each one’s presentation and tell them how great it was. They have so many questions for one another that both times they miss curfew. (However, only one of them is caught, and just the one time. Ted never lets her live it down.)

- Mod Snafu

#andromeda tonks #ted tonks #queer hp #trans headcanons #bi headcanons #ace headcanons #aro headcanons #andromeda black #trans #demisexual #demiromantic #bisexual #pureblood #mod snafu #anonymous #asks

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andromedaatnight · 4 years

Text

untraceable—

It turned out there were spells to make yourself unreachable by owl, charms that had to be renewed every so often. McGonagall had reluctantly explained them to her. Andromeda was glad she’d chosen the Transfiguration professor to speak to and not her head of house. Slughorn would have tried to talk her out of it, she knew. McGonagall had taken one look at her and had known, somehow, that there was no changing her mind now. Or perhaps it was the frenzied state Andromeda had shown up in, at eight o’clock in the night, her mind already thinking of train schedules and time limits.

So Andromeda had gone straight from her meeting to Wimbourne. Her schoolbooks were stuffed into her trunk. Every last belonging she needed was packed away. She sighed, sitting on the edge of her bed and letting her owl, Thetis, free from her cage. “Go home,” she whispered. Thetis hooted softly, nipping at her finger. The note was brief, shorter than any letter she’d ever written to her mother: Don’t look for me. I’m safe. Just needed some time away. I’m so sorry. I’ll be back. Love, Dromeda.

Andromeda waited until Thetis was out of sight, then shrugged on her coat. She was wearing her plainest dress, no jewellery, no makeup. Peering into her mirror for a moment, she traced her wand over her hair, and her locks turned from ink-black to blonde waves. She laughed a little: she was still recognisable, if strange-looking, but it would have to do for now.

Hand on her trunk. Inhale, exhale. When she opened her eyes she was in a quiet corner of Victoria Street. The Night Ferry departed at nine; it was half past eight already. She could not stand out, she reminded herself, and so she purchased a second class ticket. It would be eleven hours to Paris; the half-nervous, half-excited jitter of a journey kept her awake through to Dover, and even after the carriage had been moved onto the boat and her body had grown used to the gentle lull of the sea, she stared at the roof her berth unable to believe this was happening.

The city was freezing when they arrived: nine a.m. but it might as well have been five, for all the weak sunlight that filtered through the clouds. Andromeda had been up since dawn, having breathlessly scrubbed her face and rinsed her mouth and tugged on warmer stockings in the train’s tiny washroom. Lugging her trunk behind her, she set off in no particular direction, shivering despite her gloves.

There was a rental agency, appearing as if conjured to her right. Serendipity, Andromeda thought, and ten minutes later she was walking out with answers: 14 rue Jouye-Rouve, Madame Bisette is the landlady, too far to walk, mademoiselle, take the bus. And, Mon Dieu, you need francs, and so she had exchanged one Muggle currency for another. And, some identification, please? So she had handed over a charmed card she had worked on during the train journey: not a facsimile of Muggle identification cards, because she had no clue what those looked like, but a simple suggestion: see what you expect to see.

The man had squinted, frowned, your name? Andromeda had to bite back Thea — so obvious to go by her middle name. “Theresa,” she managed instead: totally random. And there was no use hiding the fact that she was English.

The bus deposited her on rue Jouye-Rouve, and she deposited herself at number 14, a narrow little residential hotel. Madame Bisette was a keen-eyed older woman, and Andromeda found herself instantly wary. What if her landlady asked too many questions — or realised she was pregnant? She kept silent as they carried her trunk through the narrow staircase up to her third-floor flat.

And flat was perhaps a generous term — the sitting room, as it were, was also the dining room, and also the kitchen. The bedroom contained only a bed and a wardrobe. There was no running water — just a big basin to wash up in, and the bathroom proper was down the hall, shared with everyone else on her floor and the one beneath. Andromeda asked cautious questions: where was the nearest grocer’s? Where could she get linens? Did Madame have a tea kettle she could borrow until she had her own?

Madame Bisette gave matter-of-fact answers to all these: down the street, in the wardrobe, yes, there was a spare in the kitchen cupboard. And then she said, “You have a pretty schoolgirl’s accent, Thérèse.”

Andromeda was unsure what to make of this. Private tutors had, of course, taught her to speak French. She had never been aware that was audible in how she spoke it. “Yes, that’s where I learned French. In school,” she began. Was any further explanation necessary?

Bisette barked out a sudden laugh. “Better than the Americans! Now, you’ll want a job — the students often work at travel agencies, though I could never stand dealing with tourists — bah! But it would be nice to work at a desk from which you can see the Champs Elysées, yes?”

Andromeda could not be certain what she’d said to make the woman so friendly, but she took it in stride, smiling in earnest. When Madame Bisette bustled out, giving her a pat on the shoulder, she left a long list of places to investigate: cafes, supermarkets, prospective workplaces. Andromeda slipped off her coat and faced her new home, hands on her hips. This was a fixable situation, she thought happily. This, her new life, was something she could tinker with and solve, optimise, perfect. There were choices to be made, and she could make them. The May chill did not feel quite so sharp anymore.

#drabble #sleepingddrabble #this is from early may we luv retrospectives

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drarryruinedme7 · 5 years

Note

Hi hun! Congrats on the 400 followers.🌹 May I ask for a Drarry babysitting Teddy Lupin?

Hey there @harrypotterfanfictionwriter! Here I am, I tried to write something for your prompt and I hope you’ll like it!! 💗Many thanks to my beta @keyflight790 and my always supporting alpha/beta/friend @rockmarina ❤️.

Drarry | Rating: General | Word count: 2.8K | Tags: babysitting Teddy, redeemed Draco Malfoy, boys in love, first kiss | READ IT ON AO3.

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

The first time they met there, it was weird.

Harry entered Andromeda’s house with a little package in his hands and halted abruptly on the doorstep.

“Dromeda… why is Teddy’s hair so…” Harry struggled to find a word until nothing better than, “Malfoy-ish?” came to his mind.

His step-aunt snorted, shaking her head lightly. “Don’t you think he looks cute with this platinum blond?”

Harry regarded Teddy more closely. The kid was now looking expectantly at the package in Harry’s hands. He kinda did look pretty with blond hair, but that wasn’t the point. He opened his mouth to reply when none other than Draco Malfoy appeared on the stairway that led to the second floor of the house.

Harry’s hands tightened around the wrapping of Teddy’s present and his eyes snapped to Andromeda. She was apparently concentrated on knitting some sort of coloured scarf and wasn’t paying attention to the fact that a former Death Eater happened to be in her house.

Malfoy caught Harry’s eye and just stepped into the living room, silently approaching Teddy and sitting next to him. He made Teddy’s magical marbles dance around him, eliciting heartfelt laughter from him.

From Harry’s godson. Like Harry wasn’t even there. Like Harry wasn’t even a big deal.

No. Draco Malfoy couldn’t just ignore him.

“What are you doing here, exactly?” Harry tried to convey as much spite as he could, but Malfoy simply raised his head and grinned.

He fucking grinned.

“Playing with my cousin. Do you want to join us?”

Teddy turned his head to Harry too, and his hair became almost black as he stretched his hands towards him. “Up!”

Harry was staring in horror at this strange version of Draco Malfoy. He knew he had changed since the War, he’d seen him earlier that week at the restoration of Hogwarts and he’d received his letter of apology, but surely this was a step too far.

Trying to gather his control, Harry left the package on the floor, next to the marbles, and picked Teddy up, lifting him above his head and peppering his face with kisses.

With Teddy laughing in his arms, Harry kneeled next to Malfoy and tried to smile at him. If he could be civil, Harry certainly couldn’t be any less.

He thought again about Malfoy’s offer. Did he want to join them?

“Well… let’s see if Teddy likes what I bought him.” He unwrapped the package, revealing a big stuffed horse doll enchanted to gallop an overexcited Teddy around the house.

Harry let his eyes drift towards Malfoy, who was watching Teddy on his new toy, clapping his hands and laughing. Without taking his eyes off Teddy, Malfoy said, “He’s lucky to have you as a godfather, you know.”

Harry’s world must have turned upside down, because there was no way he’d heard that right. Ignoring the way his heart was vibrating in every fibre of his body, Harry scrambled for something to say, anything. He took a marble and fidgeted with it. “Erm, these are beautiful. Did you buy them?”

Malfoy nodded, offering him a soft smile again. Harry had no idea what to think — this version of Malfoy was making him nervous and he couldn’t guess how to deal with it. When Teddy came back to his marbles, they all played together and Harry was surprised to realise he was having a great time with Malfoy, who was surprisingly good with Teddy; gentle and patient.

Their time together flew by and soon it was evening. Andromeda tried to insist that Malfoy stay over for dinner, but he refused, saying he had to go back to his mother. Malfoy’s No left a bittersweet pang of disappointment in Harry’s chest, and a plea to remain almost escaped his lips.

He managed to hold it in and walked Malfoy to the door, gripping his hand quickly to bid him farewell and closing the door behind himself. When he turned towards Dromeda, she raised an eyebrow at him and a corner of her mouth lightly quirked up.

It was the closest thing to a smile Harry saw on her face since the War was over.

—–

The second time, Harry was less prepared than the first one, if that was even possible.

He was late, he always was. He entered Andromeda’s running, barely closing the door behind himself and sprinting towards Teddy’s room. He almost missed her “Hi, Harry!” in his haste to reach Teddy… and Malfoy. He needed to be certain he met the real Malfoy the last time and not just a faker but kinder… well, also, more handsome, version of him. The whole thing stank to Harry.

As soon as he reached the door to Teddy’s room, he slowed down. A soft whisper from inside the room made heat pool in Harry’s stomach…

When the dog bites

When the bee stings

When I’m feeling sad

I simply remember my favorite things

And then I don’t feel so bad

Someone was singing… someone that definitely sounded like Malfoy and whose voice was so deep that Harry’s chest felt tight. Without thinking too much, he pushed the door slowly open to find Malfoy standing in the centre of the room. Teddy, with bright blond hair, tears in his eyes, but relaxed in Malfoy’s hug.

Harry’s breath faltered and goosebumps ran down his spine while Malfoy turned his head, nodding to Harry, still delicately singing…

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens

Brown paper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things

All Harry could do was stand there and smile, while Teddy’s hair slowly changed to his brand black. When standing there simply staring at Malfoy became too awkward, Harry approached them and gently kissed Teddy’s cheek.

“Hi,” Malfoy whispered. It was so new to hear him whisper, that Harry almost forgot who they were and where they came from. “He was crying, searching for his Mummy… but I think he’s calmer now.”

Harry felt something heavy drop in his stomach at those words, making his eyes sting and he threaded his fingers in Teddy’s hair. He replied whispering as Malfoy did. “You’re good with him, he looks so at peace… and — ” Harry chewed on his bottom lip. Was he really about to say it? “And your voice is soothing… it’s, um, sweet when you sing.”

They shared a look and Harry saw Malfoy’s cheeks gaining a deeper colour. Harry stared at him, thinking once again he had no idea who this guy standing in front of him was. Space and time seemed different when they were together at Dromeda’s with Teddy. And he let himself believe they really could be someone else, something different.

“Thanks, Harry.” Malfoy’s eyes widened before he quickly added, “Can I call you Harry?”

He didn’t have to think about the reply. “Of course, you can, Draco.”

When dinner time neared, Draco politely refused again Andromeda’s invite, greeting them at the doorstep, promising he’d stay next time.

Harry daydreamed about that next time, about them chatting over dinner, laughing, telling funny anecdotes with Teddy, maybe even talking more serious stuff, something about the War? How they were dealing with the aftermaths?

He was gazing absent-mindedly into the void when Andromeda playfully shook him. “You get along well, after all, Harry.” Her voice seemed to have a hopeful tone, rather than the flat one she had assumed after the Final Battle.

Harry felt his face on fire. Sighing deeply, he just smiled. “I guess we do.”

—–

The third time they met there, Harry knew it, it was planned. So, he should have been more prepared. But he wasn’t.

He and Draco still met during Hogwarts restoration, but there they were their old selves. Draco called him ‘Potter’, almost never approached him, keeping a distance, maintaining a cold stance.

That’s why he was so nervous when he arrived at Dromeda’s. Draco still hadn’t arrived, so Andromeda left the instructions about where to find food, how to change diapers, the right temperature for baby food and such, to Harry and then went out with Narcissa. They were trying to rebuild their relationship.

Harry was baking cookies with Teddy when Draco finally arrived. He showed a big grin to the two of them, covered with flour and chocolate, and joined them without a second thought.

The entire afternoon went smoothly, Draco calling him ‘Harry’, playing with Teddy, showing him magic, listening to Harry telling stories about Muggle life.

In the end, Teddy’s loving eyes convinced him to stay even for dinner.

All during their meal, they kept things light-hearted until they brought Teddy to bed. It was an incredibly intimate moment, where Harry felt all the warmth of a welcoming house, of love and caring for the little ones. Those feelings he never experienced as a child himself and would have never imagined sharing with Draco Malfoy.

When he was in his bed, Teddy yawned and looked at Draco with his eyes already half-closed, asking him to sing a lullaby. For the second time, Harry stayed mesmerized, listening to Draco, his voice reaching Harry’s soul and taking its space into his heart.

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star,

How I wonder what you are…

And it was in that moment that Harry knew it, he knew something was growing inside himself towards Draco that he couldn’t stop anymore, like a snowball picking up more and more snow in its fall, getting inescapably bigger as it rolls down.

When Teddy was fast asleep, they moved to the living room, waiting for Andromeda to come back. They sat on the couch before the hearth, a hot chocolate in their hands and a companionable silence between them.

After a while, Draco’s head slid on Harry’s shoulder and he couldn’t be silent anymore. He needed to ask, to know… “Do you ever – Are you…”

“I am sure you can articulate something even with your little Gryffindor brain,” Draco snarled, his hot breath tickling Harry’s collarbone.

“Ah-ah. No, I mean… I wanted to ask… are we friends?” Harry’s feet became so interesting all of a sudden that he found he couldn’t tear his eyes off of them, his cheeks burning, his throat drying.

Draco snorted, and Harry almost whined at the sensation on his neck. “Well, I hope so. I know I’ve done some shit, but…”

“Why don’t you ever talk to me at Hogwarts, then?” The question was out of his mouth before he could realise it.

Draco shifted his head, curling it even more into the crook of Harry’s neck, shutting his eyes closed so much Harry felt his eyelashes brushing his skin. His lips were dangerously close to Harry’s neck and his voice came out muffled. “I thought you didn’t want people to see you are friendly with me.”

Harry sucked in a breath. This wasn’t the answer he had expected. Actually, he didn’t know what he had expected. “Fuck ‘em,” was all he said, while with a hand he started to stroke Draco’s hair gently.

—–

It could have been the tenth or eleventh time — time passed in a blur when they were together — when Harry understood he could not escape his feelings anymore.

Harry entered the house with the warm trepidation that he learned to associate with Draco by now and as soon as he stepped foot in, Teddy ran in his arms, screaming with joy. “Harry! Dray surprise!!” pointing towards his room.

With Teddy on his shoulders, he reached the room, heart thrumming with excitement. But as much as that ‘Dray surprise’ could have made Harry imagine, when he entered his jaw dropped and his breath caught. The walls were animated by magical drawings all over, fairies, dragons, stars, planets, everything a kid can dream of was there, magnificently painted in meticulous details and vibrant colours.

But the sight that really stole Harry’s breath away was Draco crouched in front of the wider wall, a brush in his hand, completely splashed with paint, a concentrated frown on his face.

His entire body was vibrating; all he wanted to do was to reach Draco and kiss away his frown, strip him of his clothes, lick away the paint on his skin. Shaking his head, Harry cleared his throat and Draco turned, his frown quickly smoothing into an open happy face. “Erm, I think I got a bit carried away.”

“I think you’ll never stop surprising me, Draco. You can paint? This is gorgeous.”

Malfoy stood up, leaving the brush on the paint bucket. “I am full of surprises, Potter. You should know that at this point.” He smiled, flushing lightly and Harry’s stomach jolted.

“I know.” He lowered Teddy on the floor who ran to the paint bucket, meddling with his hands and squealing happily.

“Dray paint!”

Draco looked at him and pulled out his tongue jokingly. Teddy blew raspberries at him and ran away, calling Andromeda to show her Draco’s work.

Moving his gaze to the walls again, Draco sighed. “You know, I’ve charmed it.”

Harry’s eyebrows knitted together. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that I drew some basic characters to adorn the walls, but the paint will change based on Teddy’s wanting and thoughts and on the stories I’ll tell him.” He smirked at Harry, looking smug. It sounded rather impressive, indeed.

“If you want, I can charm it so that it will change with your stories, too.”

“Sure, why not.” Harry looked amazed while Draco took his wand and muttered a spell he never heard before. With his wand still sparkling golden, he asked Harry, “I need you to tell anything, anything at all. It’s just to impress your voice with the magic in the paint of the walls.”

Harry felt embarrassment take over his body; he wasn’t the good one with stories, Draco always invented them and used the right words. He was clumsy and banal, but… an idea crossed his mind. He didn’t know how that would go, but it was worth a try.

“Okay… What about a story about two kids. They never got along when they were younger, on the contrary. You could define them enemies, but they had a lot in common. Born in different families with different circumstances, they quickly learned that they had a clearly defined path in front of their selves and that they couldn’t escape it.”

Harry stopped, taking a deep breath. Malfoy was looking at him with a perplexed face, but a little smile was pulling at his mouth.

“Well, they took completely different choices and they both regretted some of them. They faced evil and, in the end, they both survived. They are scarred now, they have suffered and lost loved ones… and after all this, they met again. From the ashes of their past, they met and slowly started to rebuild, to make good from it. And…”

Somewhere during Harry’s rambling, Draco must have reached him because they were now standing mere inches apart. His gaze held Harry’s. “And?”

“A-and… they… fell in love. I… think.”

Draco raised a hand and cupped the nape of Harry’s neck, lightly caressing it. He leaned his forehead on Harry’s and bumped their noses together, whispering, “They did. They did fall in love, didn’t they?”

Harry closed his eyes, caressed Draco’s hips, said, “I want to kiss you.”

“I’m not gonna stop you.”

When their lips sealed, Harry felt years of struggling, of pain, remorse, hatred, all dissipating, melting away in the heat of Draco’s mouth, in the sweetness of his tongue tracing the shape of his lips, in the kisses he peppered down his jaw, his ear.

After what felt like a lifetime, Draco bit down lightly on his earlobe, breathing, “Harry, open your eyes.”

The walls of Teddy’s room had changed to show a pile of ashes at the bottom of the wall and a giant phoenix arising from it, in a blaze of colours and sparks.

Draco started to hum close to Harry’s ear…

Wire-framed glasses and black messy hair

Big deep green eyes shine as brightly as emeralds

Lightning-bolt scar and he loves when I sing

These are a few of my favorite things…

#drarry #drarry squad #drarry fanfic #drarry fanfiction #draco x harry #harry potter #draco malfoy #babysitting Teddy #teddy lupin #fluff #mywriting

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ravenclaw-has-claws · 4 years

Note

Do me! Do me! ask-dromeda

DUUUDE. I was just thinking the other day that I missed your face in my dash! Anyways, let’s get to saying nice things to you, because you definitely deserve it 👀 Okay so first you’re super nice? and it had to be said? AND THEN, not only you’re nice, but then your rps are awesome? Okay, so, first of all, your MORGANA?????????? I mean she’s super cool in general, but your portrayal is amazingggg. AND AND AND. Bellatrix. Her hair. KSSJNIASDB. AND THEN. Peter. So innocent looking. So on point. Like. why. how. when. who. And I’ve seen your Nimueh too, damn. very much damn. This might not be too coherent, but that’s because you’re great.

Anyways, yes, I hope I can see your face in my dash soon!

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in-tua-deep · 5 years

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My dude, my buddy, my guy, my gal, my pal. Please yeet more of this daemon AU at me, I'm super interested in this whole idea and would love to hear more, how do all of the daemons interact with each other?? What are the little quirks shared between daemon and human?? Did any of them have a phase where they couldn't stand their daemon?? Did Vanya's owl claw out Leonard's eyes when the truth came out?? How exactly would they find out that Five's daemon didn't settle?? I'm living for this AU now

oh i am SO ready for more daemon au are you kidding here we go starting with some NAMES because all good ocs need names and while the first post was mainly for just saying what animal is what now i can develop it into a full au and no one can stop me

So the kids and their daemons share a name for most of their lives, they’re both just,, one or two and so on. But when they get names they run into the roadblock of “do our daemons get the same names as us??” and realize that their one (1) example of a human/daemon relationship is their dad he his daemon doesn’t share his name so… probably not. But he only ordered Grace to give the human in the relationship a name so it’s up to their what their daemons names will be

I’m thinking Luther probably gave his daemon a space themed name because he’s my good space boy so I’m going to name his daemon Andromeda after the galaxy !! I think she would have wanted a somewhat regal sounding name because she tries really hard to model herself after Reggie’s daemon, who is the very definition of regal. Luther calls her Dromeda or Drom for short occasionally

Diego’s daemon HMMM i’m gonna say Valencia, Val for short because that means brave and I think it would be important to Diego to have a defender of some kind and they both would want so desperately to be brave bless their hearts

oh man i am absolutely naming Allison’s daemon Amraphel which means “one that speaks of secrets” and Allison calls him Raph for short and he’s still lazy and I still love him a whole lot

Klaus’s daemon i’m admittedly a bit stuck on but i’m gonna call them Rowan because it’s a tree that symbolizes life and courage and as some very fearful kids with death powers I think they’d appreciate it. Rowan is nonbinary btw (”are you a girl or a boy” “i’m made of fucking dust why does it matter”)

I named Five’s daemon Pancha because I like it and I feel like naming her Quinque, which is Five in Latin, would be way obvious because if you think Reggie didn’t make these kids learn an archaic dead language because he’s a pretentious ass then you’re probably wrong so yes Pancha it is and when the kids figure out it’s literally the number five in another language they’re going to throw a fit

Ben’s daemon is named Tamaya which means in the center literally just because they’re in the middle of two planes of existence and one is full of monsters and also because i like the name Tama as well so this is really two birds with one stone and no one can stop me

and finally Vanya’s daemon is named Pollux for exactly no reason other than because I say so and it sounds like it could be a name for a daemons from the books which i was trying very hard for the aesthetic with all the names but it’s been so long since i’ve read them oops

ALRIGHT with that over with i can actually yell about them which i’m putting under the cut because this is going to be long as FUCK

so how the daemons interact with each other… I’m probably going to leave out Tamaya for most just bc most of them don’t know that she survived Ben’s death for like,, a really long time in the fic i have half planned in my head

SO i already mentioned Andromeda is kind of a stick in the mud and unimpressed with her siblings shenanigans. She tries really hard to emulate their dad/their dad’s daemon but doesn’t have the control on her temper that she should. She’s blunt and says what she’s thinking, she doesn’t really care about the fact that daemons don’t usually speak to people that aren’t their own and she’ll boss everyone around given the chance tbh

She doesn’t get along with Val at all and there’s a lot of posturing between the two especially after they both settle. Generally she’s dismissive but occasionally she taunts Val with the fact that she settled as something that protects against wolves, and that clearly Val is too wild to ever amount to much. Val hits right back calling her and Luther “Dad’s obedient little dogs” and just generally when you have Luther and Diego going at one another Drom and Val are only half a step behind them

She gets along well with Raph and often carries him around when Allison calls him lazy and refuses to do it. Despite that thought Raph is like,, super muscular and strong and he’s a bigass snake, Drom used to carry him into position during missions and let’s just say they were a solid interrogation team with Drom’s teeth and Raph literally squeezing information out of people when necessary (though he can always rumor people just like Allison, he’s not fond of doing it and calls it cheating because he’s a contrary bastard). He tends to help immobilizing people and their daemons and is used as a restraint a lot until their people with thumbs can come along with rope or something

Andromeda and Rowan do NOT get along, mainly because Rowan is pretty vocal about the fact that their dad fucked them up and has no respect. Some of it also comes from the fact that Andromeda is a little jealous of Rowan’s grace as a cat because their dad’s fox daemon is exceptionally graceful and regal. But generally Andromeda ignores Rowan or growls at him, she’s never physically laid a paw on him outside of sparring until that scene with drunk and depressed Luther though

Andromeda,, also doesn’t really get along with Pancha either. It has a lot to do with the fact that as kids Pancha was constantly shifting where Drom would keep a form and stick to it. She would often tell Pancha that one day she’d settle well lmao jokes on her. Pancha used to frequently insults Drom’s intelligence and has called her a “dumb mutt” before but upon return those insults have been conspicuously absent for ALL the siblings. Five still has a fairly venomous tongue, but Pancha keeps her silence.

Andromeda and Pollux don’t have a relationship, simple as that. She ignores Pollux’s existence, even when the other daemon attempts to interact with her. She basically assumes their father is correct in Vanya’s uselessness and as such doesn’t care all that much about either of them. To be fair Pollux has learned from their childhood and doesn’t interact with Andromeda much either, and even when Vanya attempts to like,, call Luther out Pollux keeps his silence.

Val doesn’t like Andromeda and isn’t afraid to show it, bristling and snarling. Val actually settled first of the two of them (a point of pride), and some part of her is a little hurt that Drom turned into a dog that protects a pack from wolves and took it personally as Luther’s literal soul saying that he didn’t see Diego and her as part of the pack.

Her and Raph don’t really talk a lot but they have a lot of relatable sibling-eye-contact moments over their family being dumb shits and whenever Andromeda wasn’t available it was Val who would carry Raph so they’re actually closer to one another than their people are. Raph firmly refuses to get between any argument of Drom and Val’s and would 100% rumor them apart when they were all kids because Raph was Sick Of Their Shit™ despite his general distaste for rumoring

Val and Rowan get along pretty well actually, Rowan frequently hops up to ride on her back like they’re the captain of a furry wolf shaped ship and Val allows it even though she thinks they’re a little shit. Rowan used to hide behind Val from Reggie and his daemon and Val might still have a lot of protective pack instincts that she showers on them because they allow it. Val may or may not be 90% of the reason that Diego just sighs and lets Klaus tag along whenever, though Diego and Val often disagree on how to handle the Klaus/Rowan situation since Val wants to kidnap them both and keep them safe in their boiler room while Diego is of the firm belief that Klaus is a big boy now and they aren’t responsible for him.

Val thought Pancha was a mischievous little shit when they were kids as the other daemon would frequently jump wherever she pleased. Val isn’t surprised when Pancha “settles” as a hare since they’re associated with tricksters and are more solitary and independent and tougher than their rabbit counterparts. She’s super worried about Pancha when she arrived back with Five though, since the other daemon is far more withdrawn and look daemons are representations of someone’s soul they can’t lie - Five can put on a tough act all he likes but Pancha’s behavior is pretty clearly off and she looks at all of them like she’s seeing ghosts. Val is the one to carry Pancha back after the shrapnel incident, swearing because she knew she should have been suspicious that Five was carrying Pancha when she’d always hated being carried when they were kids

Val doesn’t particularly care for Pollux and is actually mildly uneasy around him. There’s just something… off about the other daemon. It raises Val’s hackles even if she doesn’t know why, and she doesn’t figure it out until after the fact that the reason she was wary of Pollux is literally because on some level she recognized the chains on him via the medication and was repulsed even though it wasn’t Pollux’s fault. She’s trying to be better after the fact with him.

I’m making myself so sad about Pollux right now tbh he deserves so much better than what he’s got but moving on

Raph is honestly the chillest daemon with everyone else’s daemon. No one has beef with Raph. Like, they might have beef with Allison, but not with Raph which might be why Allison and Raph are probably the least in sync out of the siblings with their daemon actually outside of Vanya. Raph loves Andromeda who carries him places and doesn’t mind him winding up on her because she’s warm.

Raph considers Val to be his bitchface pal and they bond over their people being stupid. Honestly Raph just wants to sleep for the most part. But legit though Allison and Raph need an intervention for them never being on the same page I think Raph might resent Allison leaving to become a star and he’s the one that dislikes using their power and constantly advised against using it so he might, on some level, blame Allison for them losing Claire (and Allison wonders if the stereotype against snake daemons played a role and sort of blames him) and honestly their relationship is a fucking mess

Raph and Rowan are chill, they’re bros, they know what they’re about. Raph thinks Rowan’s sense of humor is fucking hilarious and they’re both sleepy bitches (Rowan is a cat they knows what they’re about regarding catnaps) so they napped together a lot when everyone was under the same roof. They’re at an unspoken truce regarding the drug issue because unlike the rest of the family Raph actually listens when Rowan explains about their power being the fucking worst and having to numb it down after Raph offers to rumor them to get clean. But yeah like Allison and Klaus don’t hang out much but Raph and Rowan are bros.

I said Raph gets along with p much everyone but he’s not super close with Pancha simply because she was constantly on the move and shifting every other minute as kids back when everyone was unsettled like she was constantly itching to get out of her own skin. Like, Pancha’s thing is moving and being quick and honestly Raph is a little surprised she didn’t settle as a bird daemon the way she flits about. Raph being lazy, they didn’t see much of one another but he was always up for a conversation when Pancha calmed down enough or exhausted herself. He likes her, he just thinks she’s exhausting. He’s much more concerned for her after she gets back from the apocalypse though.

Raph and Pollux kind of,, also don’t have a big relationship tbh. There’s just something about Pollux that makes Raph uneasy, but he’s a chill dude and is probably one of the closest to Pollux after Pancha. Sometimes when Raph would be going slithering through the house, Pollux would sit upon his back and chill as they both went to whatever destination. Raph does think it’s a little weird that Pollux doesn’t fly considering he’s, you know, a bird, but he doesn’t press the issue (which he regrets, later). But overall he’s not nearly as interested in mending bridges with Vanya as Allison is since there’s still that something that prevents him from fully liking Pollux. But as the plot progresses he warms up to the idea more and more without realizing that the reason he’s warming is because they stopped taking the drugs hmm

Rowan doesn’t get along with Andromeda but they’re pretty chill with everyone else’s daemons. They get surprisingly protective of their siblings and even though Klaus isn’t great in a fight pre-Vietnam, Rowan isn’t afraid to flash their claws when necessary. The biggest reason they got kidnapped is because Hazel’s daemon didn’t come to the firefight in the manor and they weren’t willing to break the taboo on touching a human when it seemed like the primary objective was to take Klaus not to kill him. They ended up regretting it for the torture scene though oof.

Rowan loves Val a whole lot and likes trying to groom her and they 100% climb up on Val’s back when they feel like being lazy. Rowan is a self proclaimed dog person though they often say that there are always exceptions and eye Andromeda but this comes up again with Dave and his australian cattle dog daemon where, when they meet, Rowan blurts out that they’re a dog person and Dave’s daemon snorts in laughter considering that Klaus’s daemon is literally a cat. He is the personification of ‘cat person’ his soul is a cAT.

I already yelled about Rowan and Raph being nap buds, they like Raph because he’s never judged them and just accepts that they know their powers well enough to know what does and doesn’t work

Rowan and Pancha actually get along weirdly well?? Like, Rowan can be off the walls crazy at times as you know cats get that simply zest for life and just go fucking nuts for a while before going back to sleep?? so Rowan is actually one of the few of the siblings daemons who could keep up with her when they were kids and Pancha was the last of them unsettled. There was a minor freak out where they didn’t see Pancha at first when Five popped out of the portal which prompted the whole “does anyone else see little number five” comment bc ghosts don’t have daemons but then Pancha popped up and Rowan was so fuCKING RELIEVED and continuously prodded at Klaus to follow either Diego or Five because they want to hang out with Val and Pancha

The only one of the siblings daemons who knows that Tamaya is still alive. She doesn’t speak almost at all, only rarely talking to Klaus but she talks a little more to Rowan. Tamaya is usually curled up in Klaus’s pockets or general clothing but there have been a few occasions where she rides on Rowan’s shoulders or goes off on her own for a little while (those are the occasions where Ben’s ghost also goes off for a little while, neither Klaus nor Rowan question where they go). Tamaya also occasions hides in Klaus’s room instead of accompanying them places. During the kidnapping she nibbles through Klaus’s restraints and allows him to escape a little more easily since no one expects an unaccompanied daemon, haven’t decided yet how this impacts the whole Patch dying situation

Rowan doesn’t really talk to Pollux and Pollux doesn’t talk to them, though Rowan does care about Pollux. Rowan is the most easygoing with Pollux because honestly being high means that they don’t notice Pollux’s strangeness on the same level as the others and will often direct comments towards the owl daemon. Pollux rarely responds, however.

Pancha time!! I love Pancha she’s a ball of nervous energy and can’t sit still half the time. As a kid she was constantly shifting between animals like she would run across a room and be five different animals in the time it took her to get to the other end, just always restless. She and Five kept each other sane in the apocalypse - I haven’t decided whether Dolores exists in this au and if she does would she get a stuffed animal daemon?? Decisions decisions. She’s changed a LOT from the Pancha that the others remember and is noticeably a lot more quiet and standoffish, but also she fades into the background where as a kid she was constantly bursting to the foreground and demanding attention. She looks at them all like they’re ghosts and will flinch when addressed sometimes even by other daemons. The others can sense there’s something just a little bit off about her but attribute that to the trauma (eventually though it comes out that Pancha is still unsettled and that explains it)

Pancha never got along with Andromeda and they butted heads a lot before Pancha left. Pancha’s a smartass daemon alongside her person so would frequently insult Andromeda’s intelligence or go off plan because she thought of something better and would frequently yell for Andromeda to ‘adapt!’ because that was her biggest criticism. Her fluidly changing from one form to another depending on the situation was her calling card for adapting and Andromeda would always growl that one day Pancha would have to settle and Pancha would shrug it off. As adults they still don’t really see eye to eye though Pancha has noticeably softened towards Andromeda. She doesn’t call the other daemon a dumb mutt anymore and in fact doesn’t insult any of the others at all.

Pancha liked irritating Val when they were kids but still got along reasonably well with her. Now that they’re back, Val is noticeably more protective of her family and Pancha is included with that. There are a couple of moments where Val bores holes into Pancha’s head to try and telepathically ask if the hare is okay that Pancha doesn’t respond to. When Five and Pancha are drunk off their asses, Val is the one who carries Pancha even though Luther is carrying Five. She insisted. She also carried Pancha home after the shrapnel injury and curled around her on the bed absolutely FURIOUS that someone dared to hurt her sibling. Pancha says some things while drunk that break Val’s heart, and Pancha never protests the coddling unlike Five. She doesn’t lean into it, but she doesn’t protest it.

Pancha and Raph aren’t close but Pancha likes the other daemon regardless because he never did pry into her business and showed her how to do cool tricks as a snake after he settled and she didn’t. Raph never made comments about her being the last to settle unlike most of the others (even though Ben and Vanya only ever mentioned it kindly).

Pancha and Rowan are bros though Pancha disapproves of Rowan drugging themself to keep the powers at bay and always expresses that they have faith that Rowan will learn to control them one day. Honestly Rowan finds it kind of nice even if Pancha disapproves because at least she disapproves because she 100% believes in them instead of being disapproving for disapproval’s sake. Pancha expresses that even drugged Rowan is one of the most observant of their siblings. Rowan worries about her after she comes back and keeps trying to convince Klaus to go after Five, but Five has a very venomous tongue and Klaus is delicate no matter how much Rowan figures it’s just a defense mechanism since Pancha doesn’t echo the sentiments. Rowan is worried about Five as well. Rowan is just worried :(

Pancha is the only one in the family who loves Pollux and actively seeks the other daemon out. She knows something isn’t right, but instead of being repulsed finds herself delighted at the mystery and assumes that the ‘wrongness’ is why Pollux doesn’t fly. Before Pancha jumped to the apocalypse, she kept trying to teach Pollux how to fly by shifting into various birds but it never did stick.

Yeah though Pollux is a daemon that really unnerves other daemons because they can tell something is terribly wrong even if they can’t quite put their finger on what. Pollux and Vanya don’t really communicate either and get second place in the “our human/daemon relationship is super messed up” after Allison and Raph.

Pollux doesn’t really speak. To anyone. Especially after Five and Pancha vanish. He’s just,, not really all the way there to be honest. He goes where Vanya does but does precious little, often standing as still as a statue on his perch until moved again. Sometimes he’ll interact with other daemons but not usually by speaking - he’s sat on Raph’s back or tugged at Andromeda’s fur to get her attention or silently stood in someone’s way but seriously for the most part he’s somewhat catatonic.

After they go off the meds he starts perking up again and speaks for the first time in years to Leonard/Harold and his skua daemon. He actually does have a personality, but he’s been suppressed for so long that he’s still figuring himself out alongside Vanya tbh

As the White Violin his colors switch and instead of being brown with white spots as a spotted owl he becomes white with brown spots. He also is constantly flying while they’re using their powers, flapping and keeping himself aloft roughly above Vanya’s head, half suspended by their own power. As they figure out control, they eventually realize that it’s Pollux who can direct their sound based attacks with his wings and if Vanya tries to go alone it’s uncontrolled like the attack on the trucker dudes without the focus of her violin. They have to work together to control Vanya’s powers, and it’s difficult because they genuinely don’t really have much of a relationship or know each other very well since they’ve been sedated since Vanya was like, four years old

this post is already so so long so i’ll cut it off here probably but yeAH there’s probably a scene where Pollux attacks Leonard/Harold’s daemon and claws her eye out and there’s a translated wound on Leonard because that’s how daemons work and then they both get fucked up by Vanya and Pollux’s powers/knife storm thing

(Pollux isn’t as angry as Vanya is, truthfully. He’s just… tired. He’s so tired. Vanya wants to end the world in her fury. Pollux wants to end it just so everything… stops.)

but yes please keep asking me questions about this au i’m living for it i love these dumb idiots and their daemons

(still need to come up names for the background character daemons, there’s a part of my mind whispering don’t you fucking dare name reginald’s daemon regina soul i swear to fuck so that’s a thing - i’ll also take suggestions for background character daemon names as well!! it was hard enough coming up with these losers)

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