#and not JUST cause they filmed return of the jedi here >:3

[rexscanonwife]

Also my friend sent me a few little fun things about Toshinori and I found out that he's a nature lover and he even has a favorite type of tree?? He's so fucking precious I can't stand it sometimes!! and I also love trees so I imagine we could talk about them and swap facts and stuff and I'd just really love to see him gush about it 🥺💘💘

We also talked a bit about how he would probably really enjoy gardening since he REALLY needs some hobbies after retiring lol and I can picture him in a sunhat with the apron and gardening gloves looking all adorable! My s/i comes home from work and he's telling her to come and see how good the begonias are doing and aren't the eucalyptus looking lovely and maybe he brings her flowers that he grew himself and it always fills him with pride when she wears one in her hair!! 💖💖

[baronvonkrieger]

Halloween 3: An attempt to Put Halloween back in Halloween.

One film that gets a lot of hate, is a 1980s film directed by John Carpenter, that mixed Horror and Science fiction. You would think for this film to be so hated, it must be as bad as “Manos Hands of Fate” or “Exorcist 2″. Well it isn’t that bad, in fact it is a decent film effort that stands pretty well with other John Carpenter films. So why is this particular film still reviled by some? The answer here is Michael Meyers.

In 1978, a film was released about a mental patient who escaped from the facility he was being transported to, and began wreaking havoc on the small community in Ohio he once lived. The Film was all about Halloween. Children Trick or treating, Horror movie marathons, and young people getting into mischief. The guy stealing a Captain Kirk mask, and wreaking havoc, is what moves the story along. The film was a smash hit, and Michael Meyers became an iconic movie Boogey man. He developed a big  fan base. Plans to make a series of film with different Halloween stories, would be put on hold, as they decided to make a sequel which followed the events of the first movie.

What wasn’t known at the time was bringing Michael Meyers back in the second movie, made the series the Michael Meyers show. Unlike the first film, “Halloween 2″ (1981) really had little to do with Halloween. it became a film about a psycho with family issues, who was now on a mission to kill female family members, because unbeknownst to the viewers of the first movie, Laurie Strode was -bom bom bom- his his sister! This was perhaps the most startling cinematic reveal since Frau Blucher was Baron Frankenstein’s girl friend! Apparently he limits his killing of female family members to those who are under 21, because at no time is his mother at risk. If you re-watch the first film, now you have to ask why didn’t he go straight to kill his sister right away, instead of going after these other teenagers first? That’s always the problem when after the fact you decide to make characters family after the fact. In “Return of the Jedi” Darth Vader is able to learn of Princess Leia being his sister, through Luke. How come he couldn’t figure it out when he was looking right at her in “New Hope”. Why would he have ordered her immediate execution, when he could have used that against Alderaan, and maybe worked on reestablishing their familial relation ship? 

It also means that “Halloween 2″ isn’t about Halloween, but about Michael Meyers wanting to kill his sister, while killing others along the way for the LOLs. To put an end to this character, Dr. Loomis sacrifices his life by setting off an explosion which causes Michael Meyers to become like Michael Jackson. Except instead of just his head, his entire body is covered with flame. As he is engulfed in flame, the song “Sandman” is played over the closing credits. This meant those who enjoyed Michael slaughtering ruthlessly anybody who crossed his path, the sads. If Michael was really dead, how could they enjoy their favorite mass murderer killing people?

These fears were realized with the next film, “Halloween 3, Season of the Witch”(1982). This was an attempt to put Halloween back in the Halloween series. A druid is sick of the non druids appropriating a holy day of his faith, and decides to wreak vengeance on the non druids mock Samhain, by steeling a piece of Stonehenge, and sabotaging masks, to kill children wearing them at an appointed time killing Children using computer technology. Hated by some, this film has increased in popularity over the years, developing a bit of a cult following. Even fans of Michael Meyers, admit the film isn’t to bad, it just shouldn’t have been a Halloween film. However, there is a lot more about Halloween in the third installment, then you’ll find in the second installment.

“Halloween 4, The Return of Michael Meyers”, brought back Michael Meyers, and ended John Carpenters hopes for a Halloween anthology series. This also would mean that you can’t make a film called Halloween, without it being about Michael Meyers, and I honestly don’t know what else you can do with a silent killer who wears a mask. Team him up with another boogeyman, like Universal did with their monsters in the 1940s, when they began their monster team ups? Get Adam Sandler and the gang to make a comedy where they mug around as Michael Meyers plays it straight? A big complaint I keep hearing about “Halloween Ends” is how little they have of Michael Meyers, or that the killings aren’t cool enough. One thing both “Halloween” and “Halloween Ends” are are bookends to the Laurie Strode story. She is the survivor who ends the monster that brought her and her family so much grief. 

I always loved “Halloween 3, Season of the Witch” , from when I first saw it in a theater wearing a Don Post Skull mask on opening day in Hollywood. Don Post was a company that made the masks used in the films, and the Don Post mask I own, is a more personal symbol of Halloween then Michael Meyers in his Star Trek mask. Like that Mask, “Season of the Witch” is a better representation of Halloween then all those Halloween films, which are really only about Michael Meyers.  And as I write this, there are now 14 days till Halloween....Cue “London bridge” song”.......14 days till Halloween, Silver Shamrock!

[short-wooloo]

A Defense of Ki-Adi-Mundi Meta

Next to Mace Windu, Ki-Adi-Mundi is the biggest whipping boy of anti-Jedi people, being used as an example for why the Jedi are “bad” “hypocritical” “war criminals” or “the real villains/evil” and whatever other bad hot take they come up with that they think makes them sound edgy

and I’m going to take apart the common points used to slander this great Jedi Master

Well start with the real stuff, Canon, the stuff that actually counts

1. The Council scene in TPM:

I actually have a whole post about this scene (https://short-wooloo.tumblr.com/post/649282237923295232/why-do-people-use-this-as-an-example-of-the-jedis), but the gist of why people use it against Ki is a bit of a case of “shoot the messenger”, Ki is the one to actually say its impossible for the sith to have returned, since they’ve been extinct for a millennia

to summarize my other post, believing that the sith are dead and gone isn’t unreasonable, there has been no evidence of their survival, and while we as the audience may know that the sith are in fact back, Qui-Gon has no actual proof that what he encountered was a sith

2. "He is a political idealist, not a murderer."

This line, supposed proof of the Jedi’s arrogance,

Is it though?

The Jedi have no proof that Dooku was behind the attempt on Padme’s life (and at this point in the film neither does the audience) nor are they aware of Dooku’s turn to the dark side or becoming a sith, this scene depicts the Jedi’s faith in Dooku and respect for him even though he has left the Order and leads the Separatists (who at this point have not committed or indicated that they were in favor of any acts of war)

3. Flamethrowers on Geonosis:

People (a certain someone in particular) just love to proclaim that “Jedi broke X rule of the geneva convention!” something which does not exist in the SW galaxy

But that aside, flamethrowers are not illegal in war, in fact they are not generally banned, they just fall under certain usage prohibitions as described under protocol III of the convention on certain conventional weapons (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Protocol_on_Incendiary_Weapons), even so, most militaries don’t use them, because they’re impractical, difficult to use, and just as likely to hurt you as the enemy, but Star Wars and its tactics don’t operate off of practicality, thus the flamethrowers are used because its cool

(not to mention of all the times where flamethrowers are used and constitutes a crime, being used against civilians/surrendered combatants, none of them are done at the command of a Jedi)

details and legality aside, Mundi’s use of flamethrowers was against enemy combatants, and ones who were giving his own men a particular beating, on top of a day’s worth of beatings and nothing going to plan, it was desperation, and sure using it on the Geonosians isn’t the most merciful thing, but I will maintain that the Republic was not expecting such heavy resistance from the Geos (something they say in the episode)

most of the time throughout the clone wars, the Jedi and Clones are fighting droids, non-droid opponents are rare, and per Poggle’s words in AOTC, the Geos didn’t participate much in the first battle of Geonosis, thus I’ll bet the Republic wasn’t expecting to be mostly fighting Geonosians, they were expecting droids, and thus were only expecting to use weapons like flamethrowers on droids

4. Ahsoka’s trial:

Not much to say here, just another “shoot the messenger” case, Mundi is the one to actually deliver the verdict in a situation where the Jedi’s hands were tied

5. Yoda’s visions:

What is it with people and condemning skepticism?

Just like in TPM, Mundi doesn’t immediately believe what someone is claiming without proof, and again, we know Yoda’s right because audience awareness advantage, but the characters in-universe aren’t omnipotent and don’t have all the information, skepticism is completely reasonable, but apparently being a skeptic is cause for for condemning a character

Now time for EU and Legends

Many of these are cases of eu writers doing things without oversight from Lucas, writing things about the Jedi that are contrary to how Lucas envisioned him, and contradicted information established in AOTC and ROTS, it is thus important to remember that the films (and TCW) are higher canon than everything else, when there’s a contradiction, film/tv show wins out

6. Not a Master yet:

I don’t know why, but for whatever reason, this instance is used as a bludgeon to vilify the Jedi and excuse Anakin, which makes no sense to me, as Mundi’s status as not being a Master when he was appointed to the council makes Anakin seem like even more of an entitled brat

but that’s all a moot point,

as mentioned above, this is a case of eu writers making stuff which contradicted how George Lucas envisioned things, the eu writers made Mundi a member of the council despite only being a Knight, but as Lucas saw it you can’t be on the council unless you are a Master (or if a sith/power-hungry dictator in the making forces his own candidate onto the council as a spy)

This was later reconciled via retcons saying that Mundi was appointed to the council while he was in the process of being promoted to Master

7. Family:

Ki-Adi-Mundi has a family, this again is used to say “jEdI hYpOcRiTeS!  They should bend over backwards to accommodate Anakin”

its another case of eu writers contradicting how Lucas saw things, that being that Jedi cannot marry

later writers retconned this to say that in addition to the skewed population of 1 male to 20 females in Cereans (this was established by Issue #1 of Republic) Cerean birth rates are low to begin with, and that Mundi was granted an exception to the non-marriage rule with the understanding that him not marrying and not having children would be detrimental to the species’ survival

But people will still twist this into "he didn’t care about them"

Why?

Well:

“Ki-Adi-Mundi's entire family, including all five of his wives and all eight of his children, were killed during the Battle of Cerea, a brutal conflict that resulted in more than one million casualties, and destroyed much of the planet. The damage was so extensive that there were no bodies of Mundi's family members left to bury. Although Mundi had always strived not to become attached toward his family per the Jedi Code, he nevertheless felt the attachment following the tragedy. However, Mundi recognized he had to accept their passing and move on to stay true to the Jedi beliefs, so after mourning only in private, Mundi applied himself more thoroughly to his work as a Jedi General to overcome the grief. This helped prevent Mundi from running any risk of falling to the dark side of the Force after his loss.”

Somehow, Ki accepting that they're gone and nothing he can do will bring them back and moving on, and focusing on his responsibilities as a Jedi means he doesn't care, because as we all know, unless you act like a complete psychopath and murder children over them, then you don't really care about your family

[silvermoongirl10swfics]

I trust you with my life

For @codywanweek 2021 Day 3: Lightsaber.

You can also read this fic here on A03.

No warnings. This is written as a 4+1 fic.

1)

Cody tiredly dragged his feet towards his tent, it had been a long day of fighting and finally the day had ended in a win. Obi-Wan was reporting to the Council and then needed to comm Skywalker about what they needed to do tomorrow. Unfortunately, the 501st were on the other side of the planet so Cody couldn’t spend any time with Rex. But that was probably for the best considering the exhaustion pulling at his limbs and his tiredness making his eyes feel like they were burning.

Sighing in relief as he pushed his way through the tent flaps of his tent, Cody rubbed a fist over his eyes. After taking his armour off on auto-pilot, Cody turned to his sleep cot when he slowly realised something was different. After pausing for a moment, so his exhausted mind could spot what was out of place, he noticed perched innocently on his pillow was Obi-Wan’s lightsaber. With a resigned sigh, Cody carefully picked up the lightsaber, muttering mockingly under his breath, “this lightsaber is your life Anakin. Hypocrite.”

He sat on his sleep cot, holding his cyare’s lightsaber in his hands which were resting on his lap. Through force of will, Cody managed to keep himself awake, his head would dip forward as his eyes closed, but he was able to jerk himself back into alertness. Cody wasn’t sure how long he ended up waiting, but despite Obi-Wan having been given his own tent, Cody knew Obi-Wan would make his way to Cody’s tent to sleep, and sure enough the tent flap opened to reveal an equally exhausted looking Jedi. Whose robes were creased and covered in dirt, his copper hair looked brown due to the dirt smeared into the locks and Obi-Wan had dark circles under his eyes to match Cody’s. Obi-Wan stopped and stared at Cody, evidently surprised to find Cody still awake.

“Cod’ika? What?” Obi-Wan stumbled out, unable to ask anything else when Cody just held out a hand, a hand that held a lightsaber in it.

“Misplaced something cyare?” Cody asked in a voice that dripped in fake innocence.

“Um…well yes apparently,” Obi-Wan stuttered out, his face turning red out of slight embarrassment.

Taking pity on his exhausted Jedi, Cody stood up and helped Obi-Wan take off his outer robes and belt, but before they both settled on the cot that was technically designed for one person. Cody smirked as he placed the lightsaber in Obi-Wan’s hands, “this lightsaber is your life.”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and then turned to place his lightsaber on top of his robes. “Yes, well…I will love you even more if you can refrain from telling Anakin about this little slip.”

“You can love me even more?” Cody joked with a raised eyebrow and a grin. The both of them laid down, Obi-Wan wrapping himself around Cody like a clinging tooka kit.

“It is not a hardship,” murmured Obi-Wan in a tired voice. Cody smiled and kissed his cyare on the forehead, Obi-Wan’s breaths already slow as he drifted into sleep. Once Cody closed his eyes, he was soon following his cyare into a dreamless sleep.

2)

Cody and Ghost company were jogging through a dried-up ravine, knowing that somewhere above them, jumping over the cracks and rocks was their Jedi. It made Cody relax, he didn’t like not knowing what could be in front of them, but they needed to meet up with the rest of the 212th and with Obi-Wan close by, he knew he could trust his cyare to let them know if danger was close.

The only sounds in the ravine were the soft crunching noise the men’s feet made on the sand beneath their feet, their helmets blocking out the sound of their breathing. Then a loud clacking sound, brought everyone to a stop, all on their guard they pointed their blasters behind and in front of them. Until an exasperated sigh broke the silence, “stand down men,” ordered Cody.

He bent down and retrieved the offending item that had knocked against his shoulder pauldron. Cody sighed again as his gloved hand enclosed around the item and stood back up, while activating the private comm channel he had with Obi-Wan. “I believe you are missing something,” he sighed.

There was an evident pause and then a sheepish, “ah. Yes, I do believe I have misplaced something.”

“That something, being your life?” snarked Cody, attaching the lightsaber hilt to his own belt, he then gave the order for Ghost company to start moving out again. “How many times cyare? Am I going to have to tie your lightsaber to your hand?” he added pointedly. This was not helping his stress levels, his cyare’s primary (only weapon), was consistently ending up in Cody’s possession and Obi-Wan detested using ‘uncivilised’ blasters, leaving him unprotected.

“I am sorry,” grumbled Obi-Wan.

Cody retorted, “try better.”

Obi-Wan sucked in a breath to answer back, but was interrupted because apparently Cody served with nosey busybodies who had apparently learnt to hack his private comm channel. “Mother and father are fighting!”

“Boil!” snapped Cody, because it could be no one else saying that.

“Hey! I’m just looking out for my poor vod’ike. Wooley will be upset if you and dad divorce,” sassed Boil.

Cody just sighed and as he was about to reprimand Boil for hacking his comm channel, he heard titters of laughter letting him know the entirety of Ghost company were listening. Obi-Wan just had to join in. “Why am I the father in this Boil?”

“Because Cody is always trying to keep you alive and gives off mama loth-wolf tendencies towards you and us,” Boil commented innocently.

Cody eyed up the rocky sides of the ravine and just pictured knocking his own head against the rocks and slipping into sweet unconsciousness and escaping the insanity. Unfortunately, he had to get Ghost company back to the remainder of the 212th. Shame.

3)

It was beginning to get ridiculous now. Not only had Cody lost count of the number of times he had ended up with Obi-Wan’s lightsaber in his possession, but his cyare was also dramatically throwing his outer robe off and just leaving it strewn on the floor. The first time Cody had found a brown Jedi robe fluttering along the ground in the breeze, he had picked it up to return to his General only to discover Obi-Wan had already put on a different robe. So, Cody just started to leave the robes he picked up in a box in the main storage cupboard on the Negotiator for anyone who wanted a robe as an extra blanket. He wasn’t sure if Obi-Wan knew about it, but considering how many spare robes his cyare seemed to pick up when they were on Coruscant (as he never ran out of robes), Cody wasn’t sure.

So, it was not surprising in the midst of a battle. When General Grievous made his bi-monthly drop-in/actually a gate-crash of a battle he had no reason to be involved in, a part from the single aim of driving Cody’s blood pressure sky high when Obi-Wan would inevitably torment Grievous with his witty comebacks and nearly get killed in retaliation for Grievous not having a sense of humour and taking offense. Obi-Wan spotted his favourite foe to torment, a foe the men had started to call The Runaway General. Named after the romantic comedy film the 212th had illegally watched on the holonet called the Runaway bride. The men had watched the first ten minutes of the film and all decided the bride who always ran away from her weddings reminded them of Grievous. So, now Cody was unable to ever watch that film again as his brothers had thoroughly spoiled it for him. He had tried to watch it again once, but instead all he could imagine was Grievous running away in one of the lace sleeved, A-line dresses the bride wore, veil included. A truly nightmarish image to be stuck in one’s head.

Anyway, The Runaway General made his usual wheezing entrance, if it was anyone else Cody would suggest they should see a medic for that ear grating, hacking cough. But Grievous could go and suck on a bucket of sour sweets for all Cody cared. Obi-Wan’s ocean blue gaze locked in on his favourite foe and Cody just felt the urge to cry, because Obi-Wan had that look in his eyes, the look that meant he was going to enjoy tormenting the ever-living kark out of Grievous and Cody was going to have to try and not have a heart attack. You know, situation normal.

Obi-Wan dramatically threw his outer robe off his shoulders, causing the brown material to swish majestically in the slight breeze, billowing out into an arch above the Jedi’s head and then delicately flittering down to the floor. The Jedi then charged forward, his blue lightsaber held aloft, towards Grievous, a sarcastic quip already on the tip of his tongue.

Cody just sighed.

Then over the comms he heard:

“Ooooh, solid effort that one. Best I’ve seen. I’d say a definite 10/10.”

“I have to agree with you Wooley. That was probably the best robe drop I’ve seen the General do.”

“What is wrong with you Wooley and Waxer? You have clearly forgotten the robe drop on Atollon. That was a far better robe drop. If this one is a 10/10, Atollon has to be a 12/10 at least.”

“That is a very good point Boil. Atollon was just chef’s kiss.”

Cody gritted his teeth and growled. “Focus on what you are supposed to be doing. And stop blocking the battalion comms!”

“Oops. Sorry Commander!” called out Wooley, his tone apologetic. Wooley had clearly been spending too much time with Waxer and Boil.

“Thanks for listening to today’s Dramatic Jedi Robe Drop Scoring. Tune in again when either The Runaway General, Never Had A Bad Hair Day, Kenobi’s Evil Grandfather or Obsessive Hate for Kenobi Kept Me Alive turn up to try and kill our General. See you then folks!”

“Waxer!” shouted Cody, scanning the battlefield for the Lieutenant. Fortunately for Waxer he wasn’t in Cody’s eyeline. Cody just sighed again. It was one of those days.

An hour later, when Grievous had done his usual running away technique, Cody waited by the gunships with Obi-Wan’s robe draped over one arm and his cyare’s lightsaber held in his other hand. Cody also had his helmet clipped to his belt, so he was able to give his cyare an unimpressed looked, raised eyebrow included. Which, when Obi-Wan made his appearance, his cyare directed a sheepish look at Cody.

Once Obi-Wan came to a stop in front of Cody, he took his lightsaber and clipped it onto his own belt and put on his robe. “Ah, thank you cyare,” Obi-Wan said, with a bright smile on his face.

Cody rolled his eyes. “Must we do this during every battle?”

Obi-Wan plastered an innocent look on his face, knowing full well Cody was going to mock him with ‘this lightsaber is your life’ lecture. So, instead Obi-Wan shrugged and said. “This really is a compliment, Cody.”

Heaving a heavy sigh, Cody just shook his head. “Suuureee, it is.”

4)

Yet another battle the 212th had been sent to, another battle where they were fighting against impossible numbers. However, the 212th were holding their ground and Cody felt victory would soon be in their grasp. Obi-Wan had even manged to hold onto his lightsaber, miracles of miracles. Cody had also heard on the comms, that Obi-Wan had dropped his robe to go against some tanks and apparently this robe drop scored a 7/10.

But then a loud explosion ripped through the air, Cody turned, his cyare was stopping the tanks not to far away and sure enough the explosions were coming from the tanks. Then Cody frowned, there was a silver item spinning through the air as it headed straight for Cody.

Seeing the sunlight glint off the item, Cody changed his HUD settings and sighed, “not again.” He had apparently spoken too soon. Flying through the air was his cyare’s lightsaber.

As the lightsaber got closer, Cody lifted up his hand and caught the lightsaber and immediately clipped it to his belt.

“Ooooh. Nice catch Commander!” yelled Waxer over the comms.

“A definite 10/10!” added Wooley, with awe in his voice.

“We should really start adding the Commander’s lightsaber catches to our scoring commentary,” stated Boil.

Cody just sighed, apparently his sigh could be heard over the comms because a voice suddenly rang out over the comms. “That wasn’t my fault, Cody!” Obi-Wan burst out in self-defence, his voice cracking slightly on Cody’s name.

“Somehow, I’m not entirely convinced,” Cody retorted dryly. He ignored the titters of laughter over the comms and smirked to himself.

+ 1)

The 212th had been sent to an Outer-Rim planet, for Obi-Wan to try and negotiate peace between to warring tribes on the planet. It was a nice change for Cody and his brothers, the tribespeople, of both tribes, were very friendly towards them. Nicer than many citizens on Coruscant, which said a lot to the men in the 212th. Obi-Wan was needed for his negotiating skills and it gave Cody the opportunity to see his cyare as the peaceful Jedi he should be, not the General he was.

Cody couldn’t go into the hastily contrasted hut, built on neutral ground by both tribespeople as a sign of wanting to end the hostilities. Obi-Wan had to go in alone with the Councils of both tribes. Cody didn’t mind, he didn’t get hostile vibes from the tribes and it meant he could watch as his brothers ran around and played with the children of both tribes. A sight that he could see soften the most hardened warriors of each tribe, leading to the female and male warriors to intermix with the opposing tribe. The Council members saw this and Cody noticed the tension in their shoulders fade away, he turned, feeling someone come and stand beside him.

“I believe my job has just been made easier,” Obi-Wan stated with a bright smile on his face. The Jedi held one of Cody’s hands, and smiling to himself, Cody squeezed his cyare’s hand in response.

“Amazing what children can accomplish,” replied Cody, watching as Waxer, Wooley, Boil, Longshot, Gearshift, Trapper, Meteor, Blackeye and Flycatcher began a game of chase with a hoard of children.

“And your brothers,” Obi-Wan admonished lightly. Cody felt his heart swell with love, knowing how deeply Obi-Wan cared about his brothers, made it even easier to fall in love with the Jedi.

“As I said. Children,” retorted Cody, humour plain in his voice.

Obi-Wan shook his head as he chuckled to himself. Hearing the Council members state they were ready for the negotiations to begin, Cody squeezed Obi-Wan’s hand again, and then let his cyare’s hand go. Obi-Wan turned to face him fully and gently pressed their lips together, before either one of them could be tempted to deepen the kiss, Obi-Wan pulled away. He then placed something in Cody’s hand. In confusion Cody lifted his hand up to find himself holding Obi-Wan’s lightsaber. “I can’t take weapons in with me to the negotiations as is custom, so I leave my life in your trusty hands,” stated Obi-Wan.

Cody felt his throat tighten with emotion and he nodded as he swallowed heavily. “Always.” With one more smile and kiss, Obi-Wan was walking away and towards the waiting Council members. Cody smiled to himself as he looked down at the lightsaber in his hand, he clipped it to his belt and taking a leaf out of his brothers’ book. He ran to join in the game of chase, the delighted squeals and laughter of the children and his brothers filling his heart up with joy.

End note:

My mum was watching the film Runaway Bride and I couldn’t resist writing Grievous in a wedding dress, I wish I could draw this image (Cody is probably glad I can’t) but I can’t even draw decent stick people. So I hope my descriptions of Grievous in a wedding dress make it seem funny, I was giggling to myself as I wrote it.

Trying to come up with nicknames the 212th would have made for Ventress, Dooku and Maul was actually harder than I thought it would be 😂

[dalekofchaos]

Killing The New Republic and Luke’s New Jedi Order killed the Sequel Trilogy

Disney you’re a business, who’s all about money, but then you chose to destroy the New Jedi Order and New Republic, that is definitely killing your billions, even after refusing to put storytelling first and foremost, and then having the audacity to claim “we don’t have source material” never mind the countless series of video games, comics, novels, tv shows and films, merchandising etc. Not to mention all the fucking stuff you could’ve done with the NR in BATTLEFRONT! YOU COULD HAVE MADE WITH THE NEW REPUBLIC AND NEW JEDI ORDER!

But no. Instead you made Leia an incompetent general leading an even weaker  and an on the budget Rebel Alliance. Han’s character arc was dropped, Han and Leia’s iconic romance was broken up and they were both turned into absent parents and Luke’s Jedi Order failed and 30 years of peace was undone pointlessly. But instead you just wanted Rebels vs Empire 2.0, but only this time around it’s dumber. 

Do you know what we could’ve done with The New Republic? Leia as Chancellor. Han and Lando as her Ministers of Defense. Boba Fett, Din Djarin and Bo-Katan leading The Mandalorians together as allies to the New Republic. We could’ve had a House Of Cards/West Wing/Game Of Thrones styled writing for the overall politics of The New Republic. You could’ve made a goddamn fortune on New Republic troopers, armor, weapons, fighters and frigates. Hell, you could even have The New Republic wield their own Star Defenders as opposed to Star Destroyers.  I am well aware that canon demilitarized The New Republic and already made a post on why disarming the New Republic in new canon was stupid.

What should have happened is that the NR commanders the Imperial Fleet and starts protecting systems who join the NR, all while chasing down and fighting any of the Remnants (Moffs, Warlords, Crime Lords, etc) who have grabbed power in the resulting vacuum. We could have seen an evolution of ships from Old Republic to Empire to NR ones. They could have renamed Star Destroyers into Star Defenders. Hell, they could have had a Republic of independent systems, each with their own sizable military, so that power isn't centralized.

Here is what the Sequel Trilogy could’ve been with the New Republic in power.

This could have been an interesting question for the ST. What happens after you win a war? How do you not make the same mistakes or become the thing you fought. What happens in a power vacuum? The NR should have been the dominant emerging power, and the Remnant should have been a small, secretive, unknown order, striking strategically from the UR where they hid, and causing fear and panic to spread in the NR. But no, instead of telling an interesting story, we are force fed the recycled poorly written rehashed Rebels vs Empire and the Rebels are made to be weaker than The First Order. The First Order are a terrorist movement, they should not be reigning after Hosnian Prime’s destruction, ESPECIALLY AFTER LOSING STARKILLER BASE! Concentrating your government and defenses around only one system is really stupid(AND BAD FUCKING WRITING) The New Republic’s forces should have been spread far across the galaxy. So after Hosnian Prime, The New Republic  sees the bigger picture and mobilizes their fleet and unites their forces with The Resistance. Instead The New Republic is stupidly destroyed because Rian wanted the Rebels to be the Rebels again.(lol this movie is fucking dumb) God forbid we get The New Republic fighting the First Order and making the heroes looking strong in force instead of stupidly having all the Rebels fit inside the Falcon. For the love of fucking god I hate this fucking timeline.

As for The Imperial Remnant. Thrawn, and Rae Sloane would lead the fleets and  Darth Plagueis and the Knights Of Ren would would be in command of the dark side.

Do you have any idea how fucking frustrated it was to play The Battlefront games with The Resistance who are just discount Rebels? They look fucking pathetic.

JUST LOOK AT THE NEW REPUBLIC IN THE MANDALORIAN!!!!!!!! SO MUCH POTENTIAL!

Oh and just look at the NR Troopers from Legends and fan concepts

SO. MUCH. POTENTIAL!

As for the New Jedi Order.

Ya’ll were sitting on a GOLDMINE with the New Jedi Order. You murdered the goose which laid thegolden egg. Imagine proper video games, novels, animations, films in that era.  Think about all of the unique characters and designs we could’ve seen, all the unique toys they could have sold, plus they could’ve centered Galaxy’s Edge around becoming a Jedi, building your own lightsaber, and undergoing training at Luke’s academy. I know they have a lightsaber-building thing there currently, but it would’ve made a lot more sense if they could’ve tied it in to the new trilogy with the New Jedi Order. Plus, Mark Hamill was the only one of the major OT actors who was willing to continually reprise his role well into the future, and they reduced Luke’s role to a cameo in 2/3 sequel movies and ruined his character and killed him off in the other one. They could’ve kept Luke around for several more decades and thrown him in to as many TV series, video games, and movies as they wanted to, and people would’ve flocked to see or purchase whatever he’s in, because it’s freaking Luke Skywalker. Destroying the New Jedi Order offscreen and ruining and killing off Luke Skywalker were the two dumbest decisions made with the sequel trilogy. They could’ve made BILLIONS off of this stuff. The continued pre-trilogy and post-trilogy stories, the toys, the merchandising, the video games, the books and comics, everything. What makes matters worse is that as I said, Mark Hamill was the only one who wanted to continue with his role,( Also he is an accomplished voice actor so he would have done well in the animated stuff, which also gives him opportunities to do action scenes without being young) he honestly probably would’ve been willing to reprise Luke up until he was in his 80s or even into his 90s, hell, Billy Dee Williams was just over 80 when he reprised Lando in TROS, and Luke wouldn’t even need an action-heavy role as he got older, as the Grandmaster of the New Jedi Order, he’d be able to have a similar role to Yoda in the prequels and The Clone Wars, where he provides wisdom and guidance the majority of the time, but he every once in a while he steps into battle, while the new characters go on the vast majority of the adventures. They really shit the bed with these new movies, because using the New Jedi Order with Luke as Grandmaster would’ve made them BILLIONS. I truly don’t understand how such a money-hungry corporation could’ve missed out on this, because using the NJO would’ve been like printing money. It’s genuinely baffling.

We could’ve had it all

Source

Source

For story purposes. It could’ve been like this. 

Luke starts to rebuild the Jedi by training his sister Leia. Leia could not fully commit to the Jedi because she had to lead the Republic as Chancellor, but she is made an honorary member on his Jedi Council. Leia would agree to be trained as a Jedi Master. Leia has a Yellow Lightsaber she keeps hidden should the moment arises. Leia’s most powerful force ability is Battle Meditation. After training Leia, Luke eventually encountered The Emperor’s Hand Mara Jade. Their dynamic and romance would be the same as in Legends. Eventually after Ezra Bridger returns, Ahsoka Tano, Cal Kestis, and Ezra Bridger return and join Luke’s Jedi order. The Jedi council would be this. Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa, Mara Jade, Ahsoka Tano, Cal Kestis and Ezra Bridger. The new Jedi Order embrace both the Light and Dark Sides Of The Force instead of repeating the mistakes of the Jedi of old and so balance can be brought to the force. Balance would mean understanding both aspects of the force and you can indulge in your anger and more toxic emotions, but you can’t let them rule you and when you can come to peace with that, that’s when you have balance.

Also, Luke’s Jedi order would include multiple aliens species from Wookies, Twi'leks, Iridonians, Trandoshans, Mirialan and you get the picture. 

Finn would be a mix of Kyle Katarn and Finn Galfridian.

For those not familiar with either character. Kyle Katarn, a self taught force sensitive who was a former Imperial Stormtrooper that later became a Jedi Master, Battlemaster and a Jedi Council member. Finn Galfridian, a Jedi who is from Royal background and is part of the New Jedi Order who was being taught by Luke Skywalker Finn could still be a Stormtrooper that chose empathy and to walk away, this results in Finn becoming Force Sensitive and brought to be trained by Grogu. We would later find out that Finn is a lost prince of Royalty stolen by The Imperial Remnant. Perhaps, in this scenario. Finn could be the lost Prince of Naboo. Finn would of course continue fighting in the war, but with Artorias on the New Republic’s side, they will gave more funding and at least another ally. It would also provide Finn the ability to have a home for the Stormtroopers after Finn liberates the Stormtroopers from the Remnant. Finn could allow the Stormtroopers that still want to fight to serve in the Naboo military. The Naboo having weak defenses could greatly benefit from having trained soldiers serve them and if the Stormtroopers would prefer a peaceful life, Finn can offer them a civilian lifestyle away from the judgment the rest of the galaxy would give them for their past, even offering them reparations.

Also, Finn would find love with best damn pilot in The New Republic, Poe Dameron!

Luke and Mara would have a daughter. Kira Jade Skywalker(who of course would be Rey) she would grow up loved, with her family and with the Jedi. They would all truly be With her. 

Ben Solo, Breha Solo(Played by Billie Lourd) and Jaina Solo(played by Millie Bobby Brown) would be the Solo children. Ben, Breha, and Jaina would all grow up close and would thrive as Jedi while their parents would visit and shower them with the love they would naturally receive from Han and Leia as their parents and Han and Leia would stand strong together leading The New Republic

You could have Ben Solo being the most promising of Luke’s Jedi Knights. He can either stay as a Jedi or choose The Imperial Remnant and become Kylo Ren. The Jedi Order is split between the Jedi loyal to Luke and those loyal to Ben. I will say Ben’s fall would be similar to Jacen’s. Because he sensed something terrible coming. The Grysk. He feels that the Jedi and the NR would not be enough. So he gives in to Darth Plagueis and leads the Knights Of Ren. But when The Grysk attack, Ben shows us his true colors and returns to his family to fight The Grysk and unites both The New Republic and Remnant. 

If Ben doesn’t turn to the dark side, Ben would stay true to the Jedi and his family. Ben would lead the Jedi to face the Knights Of Ren and destroy Plagueis.

Together Kira, Ben, Breha, Jaina and Finn would rise together and destroy Darth Plagueis and end the Sith once and for all.

But that’s not the end, because The Grysk would invade the galaxy.

Towards the end of the Trilogy, The NR and FO will join forces to fend off The Grysk invasion. Sloane will call for a cease fire and signing a treaty with Leia, where The NR and FO align their forces and build The Galactic Federation. Building a better galaxy together. Leia's vision for a Republic and Sloane's virtues for the Empire.

We get the legacy characters getting treated with respect, we get the new generation built upon and being prepared for the coming war and are all treated as important heroes, we have a FO treated like strong villains and a stronger threat to unite both forces and we have peace in the end. This is how I think the ST should have been handled.

The theme should’ve been family. It’s about how the Skywalkers and Solos lead and protect the galaxy. How well Han, Luke and Leia became after the fall of the Empire and the upbringing of their children. It should end with all is well with the Skywalker and Solo families. Not end in misery.

As Carrie Fisher said

“It’s about family. And that’s what makes it so powerful.”

We could’ve had it all.

[tvpeongsstuff]

Supreme Emperor Obiwan Kenobi

New story idea.

After Mustafar Obiwan and vader do not have another run in for a few years. But, the first time they do Obiwan makes one of his distract my enemies while fighting comments. Vader gets distracted and loses again and Obiwan runs away. It keeps happening.

At first vader does not realize what this means until he and one of his henchmen (inquisitors?) get into a fight with Obiwan and Obiwan starts flirting with the henchman like he does when he is fighting his enemies and turns to vader and flirts with vader like he does with his enemies.

Anakin Skywalker, Obiwan Kenobi's padawan/brother/son, realizes that he is now just another sith obsessed with Obiwan. And, that to Obiwan he is no different than Ventress, or Dooku, or Grievous!

He doesn't handle that knowledge well. He goes even more crazy looking for Obiwan. He cannot handle being just anything to Obiwan. He starts looking for ways to increase his power tenfold. He starts training like crazy.

He pays top dollar for holorecordings (old or new no questions asked) of Obiwan fighting against other darksiders, criminals, and imperials. There are a few new videos. If any of them get in a lucky strike, vader makes them fight him. Inquisitors, the criminal underworld, and officers start getting chopped to pieces or killed. The imperials that survive get cybernetic parts. There are also a lot of older videos of Obiwan fighting with other Jedi, especially Anakin Skywalker. Those were supposed to be destroyed after the fall of the Republic. They make him feel...

Unbeknownst to both vader and sidious, the rebellion realize what's happening and start using vader's obsession to get vader to turn his sith fury on the complacent core worlds. They were the ones comming the info lines saying that Obiwan was on X planet or Y planet. Then when vader and his troops show up, they would broadcast the carnage. And, they carry out covert operations on other planets as they know those planets are vaderfree. For example, creating a spy network on Naboo, moving ammunitions through planet A.

The Rebellion recruits Obiwan to their cause. Bail reaches out to him, tells him the plan. They need him to distract vader. It's twofold: They don't want vader getting suspicious and they need vader to keep destroying coreworlds. He needs to be filmed looking heroic, walking through rich districts, passing by Core senators mistresses second homes, in the same are as a new important imperial's kept man (misters?). He is going to be their Katniss Everdeen (an ancient hero). People are going to get hurt but every jedi knows that the good of the many outweighs the good of the few or the one.

It works! If there is a rumor that Obiwan is on a planet, vader shows up with squadrons and tear the area apart, torture people for information, etc. This backfires on him because he razes so many places the empire can't completely censor the videos before they get out. People stop calling in as much, no matter how good the bounty.

Palpatine is at first happy with vader's obsession. He's all, "Give in to the power of the dark side" and he loves cyborgs. But, vader is single minded in his pursuit. It's like he transferred all of the love he had for Obiwan into this chase. Palpatine knows how much Anakin loved Obiwan so...on the one hand let vader find him and kill him, cementing palpatine's rule and ensuring vader's complete loyalty. On the other hand, vader is wrecking core planets and undermining his hold right now.

Sidious orders vader to stop and concentrate on other things. Vader does not listen. He receives a holo showing Obiwan on Naboo visiting Padme's memorial. He freaks out, goes to Naboo, takes the entire 501st and the 212th. He questions the queen. He rips apart members of Naboo's ruling class. He breaks public monuments. His purge troopers pull people out of their homes and beat citizens in the street. All of this is being broadcast galaxy wide.

Naboo's gentry are comming palpatine on his private line complaining and asking him to control his maniac. The rebel broadcast and the regular broadcast are wondering if this new empire is going to keep infringing on the rights of citizens? Are the people hurt by the rampaging vader going to have any recourse? Perhaps they should return to a republic? Sidious can't let this stand. He looks weak. Vader is destroying his home planet and ruining his image.

He leaves Coruscant and goes to Naboo. This was all part of a plan by the rebellion and it worked perfectly. They sneak Obiwan into Coruscant. They needed both vader and the emperor off planet so that no one powerful would be around to sense Obiwan. The rebellion are going to rally support to their cause, build up the capital's spy network, and film holos of Obiwan on planet to play at a later date to embarrass the empire.

On Naboo, vader is mourning at Padme's tomb when sidious catches up to him. The rebellion have set up holo cameras to spy on vader's every move. Breha told them to set up low tech motion detector cameras at the tomb. When the emperor comes in he berates vader and shoots force lightning at him while Vader writhes on the ground and screams in pain. It all gets captured on holo.

S: "I do not care about these morons, Lord Vader. But, you need to get yourself together and stop embarrassing me. Use your grief to channel the power of the dark side!"

Vader (gasping and panting): Yes my master

S: You have been letting Kenobi make a fool of you. Perhaps he is better than you? Perhaps you do not truly want to kill him? Did you forget how he turned on you and cut you down? Do you not want your revenge?

Vader: Yes I want my revenge

Sidious: Good good apprentice. When next you meet pull on the dark side of the force. Show Kenobi what you are capable of. Let him be the one to suffer.

V: Yes master

S: Good we leave at once for Coruscant. Gather your men.

Meanwhile Obiwan had met with senators and businessmen sympathetic to the rebel cause. He's gone down to the lower levels and spread hope amongst the poor and downtrodden. He's used the force to heal. He's filmed at the barracks and the senate. Finally, he's at the jedi temple. Obiwan has been making poignant propaganda films. Now, he has to make one about the fall of the republic and the murder of the jedi. He does. It's heart wrenching.

He talks about life in the jedi temple. He talks about the camaraderie and love all the jedi are raised with, how he didn't realize people thought jedi were baby stealers. He explains that the jedi only took unwanted children, or children whose parents could not help them with their powers. Every jedi who wanted to could leave the order. No one was kept by force. All jedi were educated on their culture and traditions. And, he talks about that final day, the murder of the jedi in the temple, the slaughter of the younglings. . He talks about finding all their bodies after, the futile search for survivors, the desperate he harboured. He cries.

The rebellion thought that they would have more time. The emperor was supposed to stay on Naboo as is his wont and make nice with his fellow men. They did not expect him to come back immediately with vader, two starships full of clone purge troopers, and 7 inquisitors. They realize they cannot get Obiwan off planet. It's too late. Vader and sidious have sensed his presence.

Obiwan makes a decision. He could die trying to escape or he could make a heroic last stand. He has the rebellion set up holo cameras all around the area and go into hiding. He tells them to broadcast his last recording. Hopefully it will rally people to their side when he diies. They have to get themselves to safety. Obiwan knows he has to push vader into killing him quickly. He hides all of his most sensitive information deep behind his strongest shields. Then he meditates. He is as ready as he'll ever be. He has to trust in the force.

Sidious knows that this is the perfect PR opportunity. He has to counteract Obiwan's emotional appeal. He sends Vader with all the troops and inquisitors after Obiwan. Vader knows better than to fail him but back up couldn't hurt. Obiwan must die! He also orders all the empires holos to broadcast the fight throughout the galaxy. He goes to the senate and announces that "there have been reports that the jedi terrorist Obiwan Kenobi has been spotted on Coruscant. Not to worry. Not to worry. I have sent Darth Vader to deal with him. At long last we will be rid of the jedi menace and our glorious empire can finally know peace." This is also broadcast throughout the galaxy from the senate cameras.

The fight starts. It's epic. Obiwan battles Vader and the Inquisitors from the jedi temple to the senate rotunda. He knocks out 3 inquisitors and badly injures 2 more. He catches blaster bolts and directs away from him back to his enemies. He keeps flirting, and making jokes and puns. Vader is enraged. He starts fighting horribly. He loses focus and jumps in the way of his inquisitors. (They already know he's obsessed with Obiwan Kenobi and the suspect if one of them land the killing blow vader will destroy them.) He chops off one of vader's hands.

Obiwan: Did I unhand you? That must burn.

Vader becomes apoplectic. How is Obiwan beating him? Again? He remembers what sidious said and starts pulling on the dark side of the force. Vader is literally pulling all of the darkside energy on Coruscant into him. Here's the thing, there is no true dark side force energy. There is only the force that can be used for dark purposes or light purposes. The way the force is used taints the force around the user. Vader is actually pulling the force away from darksiders like the Sith.

Vader begins the drain Coruscant of its dark energy. He pulls the force out of all the inquisitors that surround him, draining them. This knocks all of them unconscious. He needs more power! He pulls on the dark energy around him that has been clouding the force on Coruscant. He pulls even harder. Several weak dark side senators fall unconscious. Dark side users around the planet start passing out. Still Vader needs more power!

Palpatine feels a drain on his powers. Too late he grasps what's happening; he tries to reach out to vader. "Stop! Stop!" he screams, " Stop this at once Lord Vader!" He tries to raise his shields but he and vader share a connection, sneakily placed there by him while vader was still a child. Usually the connection goes one way. He pushes doubts, fears, dreams, and pain on vader and sits back and enjoys the emotional turmoil. Today vader has blasted that connection wide open and is taking all of the force from him. He falls unconscious.

Obiwan Kenobi can see dark energy flowing into vader. Dark energy from teh inquisitors on the ground, dark energy swirling in from the air, an ocean of dark energy coming to him from the senate. Vadear is swarming in dark energy. Obiwan can feel the turmoil, rage, and hate. It feels like....anakin skywalker throwing a tantrum when he didn't get his own way as a child.

Obiwan knows how to deal with this, probably Anakin's biggest darkest tantrum. He opens the bond he has with anakin a little, looks into anakin, puts the right amount of force into his suggestion and says "Sleep." Vader collapses and Obiwan catches him with the force.

The flow of energy into vader immediately starts to slow down. From their connection Obiwan can sense all the people vader has been sucking dry. If vader stops draining them they will wake up, so Obiwan keeps the flow going.

All this time the battalions have mostly been standing by idly. They were ordered to take shots to incapacitate or distract the jedi, unless he somehow won. Then they were to kill him. They start firing immediately. With Obiwan's focus and the energy of all the darkside at his fingertips Obiwan is able to catch every single bolt blast. He starts moving towards the senate following the ocean of darkness, parting bolts in front of him like he is parting water. Some of the troops try to run up to him to fight him but they get caught and stuck. He is floating vader and the inquisitors behind him. The caught troopers start floating along with them also. As they pass, the bolts fire.

In the senate, chaos reigns. A few senators and the emperor have collapsed. Medics have been called for them. On their screens, Jedi master Obiwan Kenobi has bested Darth Vader and his inquisitors. He is walking through the blaster bolts of thousands of troopers. He has proven himself unkillable and now he is coming straight for them. Some of the weaker members of the senate try running away. Others call out to the Coruscant senate guards to protect them. An enterprising member orders the doors sealed. It makes no difference.

Obiwan Kenobi enters the senate. and jumps to the emperor's hover chair. Vader is hovering behind him still but he has left the inquisitors and the clone troopers at the entrance to the senate. The troopers are still firing at him indiscriminately. He is catching the bolts and directing them to the walls. He looks down at the emperor who is being treated by a medidroid, throws the droid away with the force, and closes his eyes for a few seconds. All the cameras are on him. Every household in the galaxy is watching. This is being projected to every screen on every warship. Imperial officers the galaxy over are watching from their posts.

He opens his eyes

Obiwan: By the ancient laws of this senate, and pursuant to charter 9 as set forth in the old republic, I name myself the vice chair of the senate Obiwan Kenobi. Alpha Tango Abera Cadebera Seven Five Thirteen.

There is a pause. Then a flurry of sound as all of the technology in the senate updates at the same time. The ancient code of the senate computers accepts Obiwan's passcode and turns the full power of the senate over to him. All connected systems update also.

Obiwan: Commanders execute order 4. Cancel order 66 and stop shooting.

All the clones stop shooting.

Obiwan: All powers are hereby handed over to me and whatsoever remains of the Jedi order. I declare myself Supreme Emperor Obiwan Kenobi.

Part 2

[youreobsessedwithtoomanyfandoms]

No

Word Count:1012

Okay, so was raised by Red Room, but Natasha took her in when they found her, about the same time as Age of Ultron but a little before (they also have the energy blast thingys like Nat has)

Hopefully that all makes sense

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

(Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6)

~

"--How dare you say Empire Strikes Back is the worst Star Wars film from the original trilogy! Darth Vader was in it so much!"

Ned rolled his eyes, "Is that really your only reasoning for it being your favorite movie? The best movie from the original trilogy is A New Hope. It introduces everything!"

Y/N scoffed, "Why? I mean, sure, Carrie Fisher is hot as fuck in that, but she's hotter in Return of the Jedi."

"Y/N/N, your bisexuality is showing." She moved her head over to Peter.

"And? What's wrong with that?"

Peter laughed, "Nothing's wrong with it, it's just funny how you are."

"You're weird Peter Parker."

"I'm not weird, I'm unique. Now, please, go back to your conversation, it was very entertaining."

Y/N rolled her eyes, but turned back to Ned, "Fine, the prequels, what's your favorite movie from it?"

"Revenge of the Sith."

"Good, we agree on one thing at least."

"Sequels?"

"Force Awakens, I can't say why cause I have no dammed clue."

"Really? You guys go from arguing to agreeing. It's no fun when you agree."

Y/N smirked at Peter, but before she could speak everyone turned to where they heard screaming. The two heroes send each other worried looks and grabbed the headset from their pockets and slipped them in. "Guys? What's going on?"

"Romanoff? Kid, is Parker with you?"

"Yeah, Clint, yeah, I'm with her."

"Good, get your asses suited up!"

"Got Clint!"

"Will do!"

The two college students clicked the bracelets and their suits began to appear. Of course the, barely, younger of the two had to strip herself of her top and pants so she didn't feel uncomfortable in her skintight suit. "Even after two years, it still smells like a new car in this suit." Y/N laughed at Peter while she placed the little black mask on her face.

She tossed her hair into a high ponytail, "At least your mask doesn't make you look like you're apart of the Umbrella Academy."

"Of course." He looked at her fully and lifted his fist up, "Ready?"

She lifted her fist up to his and tapped it, "Always am."

They turned from each other and ran to where they were hearing even more screaming and yelling. Of course Peter didn't notice the group of people that were coming for them so Y/N quickly shot an energy blast to them. "Pay attention man."

"Parker, I need you over here on Elm Road."

He nodded and ran off to where Clint asked him. Y/N stayed where she was. It was a building that they knew was practically always empty. The workers were night workers, only there in the night. She ran up the stairs, to the 7th floor. She was in the middle of the building. She ran over to the window and kicked it open. Shooting blasts at the people in the air.

"Little Romanoff, where are ya kid? We need you down here."

"I'm at the business building on fourth street. Where are you Tony?" She began to run back to the stairs, but slowed herself down to a stop when she heard ticking.

"We're all on fourth too, they seem to be gathering for something."

"Alright," She walked closer to the ticking. "Fuck," A bomb, ticking down, 20 seconds, "There's a bomb, I won't make it."

"Kid, get out."

"Nat, I'm so sorry." She tried to run to the stairs, but was ultimately stopped when the bomb went off.

From the ground, the team watched in horror as the building went down. Steve held Natasha so she wouldn't run into the falling building. Tony doing the same to Peter. Wanda had her hand over her mouth. Thor held his head down, his hand resting on Clints shoulder. Even Hulk had tears in his eyes. No one knew what to say, they just knew that there was no way for her to survive that. They knew that there was no way they could get the spunky, dyed lilac haired girl back.

--------

It had been a few hours. Police found her ear piece and bracelet in the wreckage. Now everyone was sitting in the living room of the tower. Silent. Natasha and Peter kept saying that it wasn't true, that the police didn't look hard enough. Thor and Wanda were angry, angry that they did nothing when they could have done something. Bruce and Tony were talking, trying to find a way to change it, to make it be them who were there, not her. Clint and Steve were silently crying to themselves. Not saying anything. Then there was the rest, those who weren't there. They had accepted it. Accepted the fact that, sadly, she was gone.

--------

Three days after, they had a closed casket funeral. Since there was no body, they had no reason for the casket to be opened.

--------

A month after, Natasha disappeared. Peter went into a depression.

--------

Two months after, Steve and Bucky had found Natasha and made her come back. Peter dropped out of college. He rarely left his room at the tower.

--------

6 months after, Natasha had finally began to turn back to normal. Peter was continuously jumping between the second, third, and fourth stages of grief.

--------

A year after, Peter finally realized why he was so upset over it. Peter finally realized how much he loved her.

--------

However, up in Siberia, things were different.

--------

Three days after, Hydra had successfully wiped Y/N's memory of being with the Avengers. Making her a human weapon like Bucky.

--------

A month after, Y/N successfully finished her training and was put into the field.

--------

Two months after, Y/N had a run in with Steve and Bucky, neither recognizing her, but something about them rang a memory.

--------

6 months after, Y/N slowly began to fail her weekly tests on who was the enemy and began to say that the Avengers weren't enemies. That's when they began the shock treatment

--------

A year after, Y/N had no clue what was real and what was fake. But maybe a little fight with some people will help.

[darth-schism]

Evidence to Suggest that Luke was NOT all that he seemed in TLJ

Luke Skywalker may have isolated himself because of his guilt/depression. But I also believe he did it for practical reasons, and that his “totally given up” act, was just that, an act. Evidence for this Head-cannon/interpretive take:

1. He made a map to his location

Not only that, but it was so specific, it was literally called “The Map to Skywalker.” The only way it would have gotten a name as tailored as that is if someone else had found him before Rey, or, if he told people about it himself. In any event, to whatever varying degree, Luke wanted to be found and/or influence the galaxy around him.

One piece of the map was  tossed around to all sorts of corners of the galaxy, while the rest of it was entrusted to R2D2. 

2. This was a deliberate combo to serve two different purposes

          - Keep Snoke distracted: The entirety of TFA was Kylo and Snoke obsessing over Luke’s location. Their preoccupation with it was evident and, instead of letting them focus on relentlessly attacking the New Republic, Luke gave them a reason to go on wild goose chases. Consider that Snoke doesn’t go ‘all in’ on trying to destroy the Resistance until after he realizes he lost the race to get to Skywalker. Which shows just how much stock he had put into that singular Jedi. What’s more, even if they had succeeded, they’d only have a useless fraction with no reference as to where in the galaxy Luke’s secret location actually was.      

          - Meanwhile, R2D2 would also play the role of a “given up/powered down” hero: But we see that, soon as the coast is clear, and some plot heroes arrive with the map, he assessed the situation, turned on, and sent them right to Skywalker. I think it’s safe to say that R2D2 was merely in ‘sleep mode,’ as opposed to ‘shut down.’ However, despite all this, the element of being powered down/unassuming was still crucial because... 

3. Snoke made it abundantly clear that when he found Skywalker, he’d blow up the entire landmass he was found, or even theorized to be, on

Luke would never put a population of innocents at risk of complete annihilation just because someone might to recognize him at a local market. So it’s no wonder he chose a place as isolated as he did (On top of that, considering his critical stance towards the Jedi Order by 28ish ABY, it wouldn’t necessarily be a heartbreak to him if the island did end up getting destroyed, or one to anyone else really, because of how obscure/unknown it was...or so he convinced himself).

4. He was picking his battles

If Luke Skywalker wanted to be found. Then why was he so dismissive of Rey? There’s no solid evidence here (aside from the whole existence of the map scheme), but I think there’s good reason to believe that Luke’s instant stand-offish behavior is one of caution and assessment not dissimilar how how Yoda and Kenobi put up an initial façade when they were discovered in exile (but more on that later). In any event, this approach would give him the means to offer personalized help to those who ended up on his doorstep. It honestly didn’t take Luke long to go from tossing his father’s lightsaber, to offering Rey the three lessons she needed to understand the force better. Although I believe Rey’s visit to Luke was far different than what others had probably been but (again) more on that later.

5. He was able leave anytime he wanted

The very clear image of Luke’s submerged X-Wing in the ocean painted a picture of cut ties, and a “no going back” stance. However, it wasn’t the first time that starfighter had been at the bottom of a water bed, and clearly it wasn’t the last. I’m inclined to believe that this is another part of Luke’s deliberate presentation of a hero who had lost all hope. But all speculation aside, there was nothing to physically stop Luke from leaving that island whenever he wanted. There’s nothing to say that he didn’t break form/character operate to find a way to undermine Snoke further.

6. He was actively protecting others close to him

There was a reason Luke getting Grogu at the end of Season 2 of The Mandalorian caused such a stir in Disney, and caused Kennedy to go for Faverau’s throat. All “who’s idea was who’s” arguments aside. At the end of the day it created two possible outcomes for this element of the Star Wars franchise: Either Grogu died in Kylo’s attack. Or there were survivors. Since killing the money making Baby Yoda isn’t necessarily on Disney’s to do list, it’s a reasonable bet that he survives the slaughter (unless he’s returned to Din’s side before Kylo goes ballistic, in which case he avoids it all together). But even if that does happen, this theory still holds a little water). Luke lying low, and operating in secret may have been the only way he was keeping himself, the galaxies citizens, and his few remaining students from getting hit with an orbital strike. 

7. He was never fully disconnected from the force.

Perhaps, somewhat disconnected, but it’s clear that Luke hasn’t cut himself off from the force as much as he, perhaps, wanted to admit. Luke is still able to effortlessly summon a weapon, keep control of the duel between himself and Rey, and gently lower his body to the ground when he loses his footing. Despite his stance on using/taking ownership of the force in TLJ, it seems as though Luke kept just enough around so that he could still fight. This theory is more optimistically minded than some of the others, but I still can’t help but think that Luke kept these reserves of power ready, because he already had to use them more than once during his supposed isolation.

8. Rey’s visit was different than the others who had come before.

“You went straight into the Dark. It offered you something you needed, and you didn’t even try to stop yourself.” 

“I've seen this raw strength only once before, in Ben Solo. It didn't scare me enough then. It does now.”

Other plot heroes/adventurers may have come, gone, or even convinced Luke to help them in secret. So assuming all, or even some, of the above is true, then that means Luke wasn’t just pushing to dismiss Rey, but also disillusion her. I think this is because Rey wasn’t there to get help with a specific mission, rescue, etc, but there to have Luke become the public symbol of hope again. And we’ve already listed the reasons why this couldn’t happen. On top of that, this push was done in a way that directly conflicted with all the “none theorized” reasons Luke had isolated himself. Luke knew he couldn’t accommodate this. He sensed the darkness in Rey. He sensed her connection to Kylo. In many ways his lessons also doubled as a means to properly evaluate Rey, and confirm his suspicions. In any event, all of this brought up an element of his isolation that no one else knew. He already had the, half truth, story as to what happened to his temple well rehearsed. But it was Rey’s visit that dragged out his greatest regret, which was his near attempt to take Ben’s life, due to both the mind bending fear Snoke had manipulated into palce, and the hypocritical, and self destructive Jedi philosophies that had been drilled in to his head. This was the final straw that made him want to destroy the Jedi texts. But it was also the push he needed to find inner peace, and think of the means to make one last public appearance, without endangering anyone.  

9. In no interpretation is Luke an attempt child killer 

This is more of a bonus point in nature. I think so many people were caught off guard by the narrative choice Luke undertook in this part of the film, that it painted the whole ordeal in a far more unfavorable light than it actually was. For starters: Ben was no child. He was 23 years old when he fell to the darkside. Luke was saw the images of planetary destruction, and the deaths of friends and family alike at the hands of an adult. But even at that, Luke’s ligthsaber had already lowered, and his face expressing that of shame and sadness, when Ben glances over, and decides to take up his lightsaber, and make the first strike. Luke doesn’t even ignite his lightsaber in response until after Ben swings it. The influence Snoke had over Ben, and the mental attack he lured Luke into suffering, to make this moment come to pass cannot be understated.   

 - This also means that Luke’s isolation lasted only 7 years. Not twenty, not even 10. Just 7. Which is less than half the time both Yoda and Obi Wan imposed on themselves.

10. He was following in the footsteps of his masters

I think Luke’s response to trauma is a little unfair in some ways. Obi Wan and Yoda witnessed genocide, and imposed exile on themselves for twenty years. Now, in film, we know that Obi Wan, while playing the part of a delusional hermit, worked to protect Luke as he grew up on Tatooine, and that Yoda, playing the part of a silly swamp kook, did...something...on Dagobah (?), waited for Luke to grow up so he could train him for a few weeks at most (?). 

Those are two pretty limited things, and yet they don’t catch near as much flack for “abandoning the galaxy to the Empire” as TLJ Luke does, after he also witnessed slaughter, and went into isolation for only 7 years. But, of course, we know Obi Wan did more during his time in the desert, and that Yoda did more during his time in the swamp. So why can’t Luke have also done more while on his island? Everything about the parallels here point to Luke, despite his own misgivings, applying what he learned from his master. All three Jedi isolated themselves because of their personal tragedies. All three greatly reduced their presence in the galaxy. But all three had no choice, and all three still did what they could despite their circumstances.    

11. Luke may have been overcome with grief. But he hadn’t truly changed

Now, I fully admit that this is a very optimistic way of looking at things. But some of these points also have more weight to them than others. I also cannot stress enough that even though I think some of what Luke was doing was an act, I also know it was equally proportional to the very real, emotional reasons, and struggles he faced. I also definitely do NOT think Kennedy/Johnson meant for any of these possible theories to have any validity to them. But with how they are presented, they also can’t be disproven. 

If Favreau doesn’t formally put the sequels in it’s own little pocket universe, then I really hope he takes the opportunity to make something like ^the above^ happen. It could easily be established in one to two episodes in a live action show. Lots of things could be done to make the sequels a more bearable set of movies to watch. And as much as I’m worried that hoping for this is simply too optimistic, at least now there is a justifiable interpretive take that has both in film evidence to support, and a lack of otherwise to refute.  

At the end of the day (and as usual) the important part here is to see that Luke hadn’t given up. Struggling, disillusioned, forced into a tough spot, willingly keeping himself scarce, etc. All bearable. But knowing he hadn’t given up is super important to the character and fanbase, so hopefully we get something that makes that cannon. In any facet really.  

AND IT WOULD GET MARK HAMILL BACK ON SET GODAMNIT! XD

*Reblogged with new gifs and information

[thewonderladie]

For Day 3 of PadMay2021

How might I change Padmé’s story

The first thing is, Padmé would live, but I guess that goes without saying. It's a long one so please keep reading if you're so inclined. Also, I was just spitballing so I didn't give it as much thought. My challenge to myself was to basically keep a lot of the film elements but just have Padmé be there and I really wanted to do this prompt for today! Twitter thread posted as well.

I think what I would have done is kept those deleted scenes from Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith in, especially the ones showing the growing dissatisfaction with Chancellor Palpatine. Padmé would have been one of the leaders/founders of what would later become the Rebellion. We would see her more in the Senate, trying to limit Palpatine’s powers but ultimately failing. It is here that her faith in the Republic begins wavering. She goes to Mustafar to confront Anakin and confirm her suspicions about his Fall. Everything still plays out the same way, except she lives.

Now that Anakin has become Darth Vadar, Padmé knows that she and her babies are no longer safe near him. With the help of Bail and Brea Organa, she goes into hiding on Alderaan, faking her death and that of her unborn child(ren). Together, they along with Brea Organa, Mon Mothma and other Senators start sowing the seeds of rebellion. When the twins are old enough, Padmé comes out of hiding. She meets back up with Obi-Wan (whom she had kept in sporadic contact over the years for everyone’s safety) and everything from A New Hope pretty much plays out the same, except now in addition to Obi-Wan, Vadar now feels Padmé’s presence once more and begins questioning everything even before he realizes that Luke is his son.

Padmé encourages Leia to be part of the Rebellion and she herself becomes Mon Mothma’s second in command once she officially comes out of hiding. She is helping to organize relief efforts and encourage other planets and sectors to join the Rebellion. While Vadar still longs for Padmé, she in turn has moved on. It was heartbreaking but the only way she could survive. Everything in Empire Strikes Back happens the same. Padmé confirms to both Leia and Luke who their father really is. Vadar must choose between his family and the Empire.

Padmé truly believes in their cause and begins formulating what life looks like after the fighting is over, even though a big part of her is tired and wants to return to Naboo. She, along with Mon Mothma, begin the hard work of creating the New Republic. Everything in Return of the Jedi plays out the same, although Padmé is reluctant for Luke (or Leia) to be a Jedi. That fear of what happened with Anakin is always on the forefront of her mind. But she has raised her children to be kind, goodhearted people and doesn’t need to worry as much as she does. She was a popular, beloved senator and queen and inadvertently becomes the face of the Rebellion once she comes out of hiding. It was because of her and her story that other planets and sectors left the Empire and she is rewarded by becoming the New Republic Vice-Chancellor once the Battle of Jakku is finished and the New Republic is beginning.

Luke goes on his Jedi journey, as he did post-ROTJ and Leia continues her political career as she did post-ROTJ. She becomes the Senator from Naboo and finds herself constantly in her mother’s shadow, even after her own accolades. While she loves Padmé dearly, she has always wondered if she only got to be where she was because of Padmé. By the time of the sequel trilogy, Padmé is in her 80s has stepped away from politics entirely, living out her days on Naboo. She counsels Leia whenever her daughter needs it but is otherwise content to let her children live their lives as they see fit.

When Kylo Ren, her grandson, is revealed to have fallen under the influence of Snoke, her fears are brought back front and center. She tries to confront her grandson several times, to get him to see the light and to remind him that his grandfather eventually found his way back. But it is all in vain and he kills his father in a last-ditch effort to fall completely to the dark side. Padmé sees Anakin in her grandson, and it breaks her heart. But, she feels as though she hadn’t worked hard enough with Anakin and refuses to give up on her grandson.

Padmé uses all of her political connections to help Leia and the Resistance fight off the First Order. She works in the background to try and help her grandson but he is determined to go down that same path. IN MY VERSION, PALPATINE STAYS DEAD AND SNOKE IS A NEW CHARACTER ENTIRELY DOING HIS OWN THING.

After Kylo Ren kills Snoke, he becomes the new Supreme Leader, much to the dismay of his mother and grandmother. They realize that there is little they can do to save him from himself. For Leia, she feels like a failure of a mother. For Padmé, it is history repeating. Eventually the First Order is overwhelmed by the Resistance and they are forced to surrender/retreat. Kylo Ren is taken into custody where he has to answer for his crimes. Padmé gets one last chance to speak to her grandson and talks to him about Anakin, why she never stopped fighting or believing in diplomacy, her love for him but also her disappointment that he willingly chose the easy path. Leia also has a difficult conversation with him.

Her story ends where it began: in Naboo. While her fighting days are long behind her, her spirit lives on in her daughter and the others who were inspired by the both of them.

[factoffictionwriter]

Tiva Fic Amnesty #14

More from Chaval Extras. Things to know: Ziva has 2 Aunts back in Israel whom she took Tony to meet. The Aunts are friends with Shmeil as well. Oh, and Tony and Ziva are totally a thing. Like a thing thing.

“Wait a second. So I wasn’t imagining it? Ziva really did have a motorcycle?” 

Shmeil nodded enthusiastically, “My Ziva had a motorcycle before she even learned how to drive!” 

Tony chuckled to himself, “That explains a lot, actually.” 

“What explains a lot?” His beautiful Israeli asked as she breezed into the room, delicate looking teacups in either hand. She carefully handed one of them to Shmeil before crossing the room to take a seat next to Tony on the couch. 

“I was just telling Anthony about your, shall we say, preference for dangerous modes of transportation.” 

Her eyebrows came together as she wracked her brain for what he could possibly be talking about. But when she saw Tony’s smug little grin beside her, she put the pieces together. 

“The motorcycle?” She asked. 

“Oh yeah,” Tony chimed.

She eyed him warily, “Remember what I said about stories being exaggerated? Keep that in mind.” 

He just laughed at her. 

“What is so funny, Anthony?” Nettie asked as she too emerged from the kitchen, her two sisters trailing behind, each with their own teacup.

“Ziva was just about to tell me about her motorcycle.”

“Oh, goodness. Why would you want to hear about that horrible thing?” Adina asked as she settled into the couch across the room. 

“Because he is a man,” Shmeil laughed, “And men like two things: hot women and fast vehicles.” 

Tony nodded, “And this story promises to have both.” 

“Very well then,” Nettie sighed as she sipped on her tea.

“We do not know where she managed to get such a horrible contraption, much less how she managed to keep it secret for so long,” Hinda was giving Ziva a disapproving look, “But somehow she managed to drive that thing to school every day for an entire year before we even knew it existed.” 

“She parked it a few spaces down from her father’s car in one of the neighbor boy’s spaces. Lord knows how she convinced him to let her have such a coveted spot,” Nettie shook her head. 

“I can think of a few ways,” Tony whispered to himself, but Shmeil managed to hear it. 

“David women can be quite convincing,” the old man winked at Tony, causing his smile to grow wider. 

“Anyways, we never would have even known about it if she hadn’t gotten in that accident.” 

“Which was not my fault, by the way,” Ziva added. 

“They never are,” Tony remarked, sending her a look of such pure adoration that she couldn’t help but forgive his jab. 

“Okay, but this one really was not. The man should have looked over his shoulder. Even I look over my shoulder when changing lanes.” 

“And how fast were you going, dear?” Nettie asked, the stern look on her face telling him she already knew the answer.

“That is not important. He still should have looked.” 

“I seem to remember the officer telling us you were going 110 mph… in a 45 mph zone,” Adina provided helpfully. 

Tony let out a long whistle before pausing, “Actually, I’m not that surprised. That does sound like something you would do.” 

She rolled her eyes, biting back a tiny smile. 

“She was thrown clear across the highway. A couple more feet and she would have rolled right off the cliff and into the sea below.” 

Ziva just shrugged, “I walked away with a few scratches.” 

“If by scratches you mean 3 broken ribs and road burn up your entire left side,” Hinda corrected, “But yes, you were able to walk away. You were very lucky.” 

Tony leaned into the couch cushion, slowly sliding his hand over to rest it on her side, right where he remembered seeing a long patch of scars, mostly faded until they looked like delicate white flames dancing across her skin. 

She nodded slightly in his direction as if confirming that the marks were, in fact, the remnants of this exact accident. 

“Tali would not go near the thing,” Nettie spoke, breaking up the moment between the couple on the couch. 

“Of course Tali wouldn’t go near it. She was smart. She understood the concept of danger,” Hinda acknowledged. 

Ziva let out a quiet huff as she leaned back against the cushions, and inadvertently his arm. 

“Yes, but I understood the concept of fun.” 

Tony let out a hearty laugh at her comment before smoothly transitioning it into a cough when the aunts shot him disapproving looks. 

“You only truly understood how to piss off your father. Let this be a lesson to you, Anthony. When you have children, do not rule with an iron fist, lest they turn out to be anything like their mother.” 

“Doda!” Ziva cried, sending Adina a truly incredulous look. 

---

“Did you ever get the chance to meet Eli, Anthony?” Nettie asked. 

He felt Ziva stiffen beside him, and took that as a sign to proceed with the utmost caution. 

“Yeah, I did. A couple of times, actually. He… wasn’t a big fan of me.” 

“Nor you of him, I assume,” Hinda offered. 

“I think Eli David was a complicated man… in a complicated situation. It’s really not for me to judge. I will never understand exactly what he was going through.” 

“It is quite alright, Tony. You are surrounded by fellow Eli-haters here. I am sure there is nothing you can say about the man that Ziva has not already heard from one of us,” Shmeil assured him. 

Ziva’s shoulders heaved as she let out a long sigh. 

He watched her carefully out of the corner of his eye as he spoke, “I obviously don’t agree with many of the decisions he made, particularly in regards to his children. But at the end of the day, I think he was doing what he thought was best. He just happened to be wrong.” 

“He just happened to be wrong?” Hinda spat. 

“Doda…” Ziva warned. 

“No, Zivaleh. I am tired of listening to Eli’s excuses. He may have brainwashed you into believing them, but I will not let you bully Anthony into believing them as well.”

Tony sat forward, sliding his arm out from behind Ziva and resting his elbows on his knees, “She hasn’t bullied me into anything. Well - she has - but not with this. I just think that I’m coming at the situation from a bit of a… different angle than the rest of you.” 

“How so?” Shmeil asked. 

“Well, for starters, I didn’t meet Ziva until after Eli did a number on her. I can sit here and listen to you guys tell stories about her tending to a garden or flying off a motorcycle, but I’ll never fully understand what she was like back then.” 

“All the more reason you should be upset,” Hinda grumbled. 

Tony shook his head, “How do I explain this…” 

He looked around the small living room for a few seconds, trying to find some sort of inspiration for-

“Star Wars!” He exclaimed. 

Five heads all turned in his direction, their eye brows furrowed in confusion. 

“A movie. Really?” Ziva asked from beside him. 

“Not just a movie. A series. 7 movies. Filmed and premiered out of order. 3 movies, then 3 prequels, only to return back to the original timeline for the new one.”

“I do not follow,” Adina sighed. 

“Okay… it’s like you guys are watching the series in chronological order, and I’m watching them in the order they premiered. And you,” he pointed a long finger at Ziva, “are Darth Vader.” 

She looked confused, “The guy with the mask?” 

“Exactly,” he brought both his hands up to cover his mouth, creating a deep echoing sound as he pulled out his oldest and most adored character impression, “Luke, I am your father.” 

She had to focus hard to keep the corners of her mouth from curling up into a small smile. They both knew that she would never admit it, but she liked his little impressions. She thought they were cute, even if they were annoying. 

But then she remembered the single Star Wars film he had forced her to watch after one of his million references went over her head, and her face fell a little, “He is the bad guy, yes?” 

“No. Well, yes. But no. That’s just what they want you to think. In the original series, he’s portrayed as a total monster who betrayed his friends and killed his father. It’s not until you get to the prequels that you realize, hey, this Darth guy isn’t so bad. In fact, he was just a normal Jedi until his master took advantage of him and made him a monster.”

“And as the series comes to a close, he gets one of the most epic redemption arcs in movie history when he realizes that he had been duped into using his powers for the wrong side and then kills his master to save his son,” he turned back toward the Aunts, “So, if you guys watched the prequels first, then you would have already known that Darth was actually a good guy before he joined the dark side, making his fall all the more dramatic. But when I watch it in the order that the movies were made, I can’t help but think about how different the story would have been without that corrupt Jedi Master.” 

“And this changes your perception of Eli… how?” 

“Well, when I met Ziva, she was already a Mossad super spy. And yeah, the more I learned about the way her Dad treated her, the more I started hating the guy. But I will never be able to see him the way you guys do because without him, I likely would have never even met her.” 

“Because without what happened in the prequels, there would have been no need for the original series,” Adina nodded along as she slowly made sense of his convoluted explanation. 

“Exactly!” he flashed a dazzling DiNozzo grin at the older woman, thankful that at least someone had been able to follow his train of thought. 

[gaystardust]

Domesticity [Kanera Week Day 3: love languages/show of support]

Synopsis: Love Languages were created to explain the different ways that people show love to those around them. They are: physical touch, acts of service, quality time, words of affirmation and receiving gifts. Hera and Kanan have been together long enough that these are routine - but that doesn’t make them less important. And Kanan has a plan to prove that. Rating: General Audience Warnings: Mentions of Kanan’s past, mentions of dysphoria involving a non-POV character. AO3 Link: [link] A/N: Please note, this fic also contains badly used Mando’a, trans!Ezra, and some very out of character behaviour. But I refuse to believe that Kanan, raised in the Jedi Temple, which is objectively a communal society, wouldn’t have a streak of domesticity hidden not-so-deep in his personality. @kaneraweek

  The ship was finally quiet, no kids running around, no Lasat causing problems, no calls coming through from somewhere or another. It was a peace they didn’t often get, and one Kanan had looked forward to for hours - days even.

He didn’t bother knocking before he entered Hera’s quarters, kicking off his boots as the door closed behind him.

Hera was sat on her bunk, leaning back on the pillows, datapad held up in front of her face. Her nose was scrunched up as she read, her focus so complete that she didn’t react to Kanan entering the room, even though she must have noticed.

Kanan padded over quietly, sitting on the end of the bed so he could pull her legs over his lap.

Hera didn’t even look up from her pad. “Hello, love. Everyone in bed?”

He ran his thumb over her ankle in little repeated circles.

“Just about,” he said quietly, not wanting to break the quiet feeling hanging over the room. “Zeb is walking Kallus back, and I dropped the kid back in his bunk.”

Hera laughed as she continued to flick through her notes. “Didn’t manage to beat you at being awake, then?”

He hummed instead of replying, leaning back against the cool metal wall. His eyes flickered shut, fingers still running over smooth skin.

Hera’s voice was light and beautiful even in her teasing. “Looks like he only just lost.”

A hand looped behind his neck, gently pulling him sideways until he was lying on his side. His forehead pressed against Hera’s thigh and a hand reached to scratch against his scalp.

The noise he made was one of complete bliss, followed by a huff of frustration when the hand moved away.

“Come on love, come here,” Hera said quietly, leading him with a hand under his arm, until Kanan lay directly beside her, head on her shoulder, arm over her waist. “Want to watch some more Starstreaks?”

It took a moment for him to process the question. “I thought you were doing work?”

“It can wait until the morning.” Hera pressed a kiss to his temple as she scrolled through the options on the datapad. “Right now, I just want to spend time with you.”

Kanan melted further into her, but almost immediately felt more awake. It had been weeks since they’d managed time to themselves, and months more since it had been move than a few stolen minutes between jobs or wrapped in post-mission exhaustion.

His arm wrapped tighter across her body.

He’d missed it.

“As long as you’re sure.”

“I wouldn’t have offered if I wasn’t,” Hera pointed out quickly. “So, Starstreaks?”

“Ehhh, I’d rather watch something with a little more action.” Kanan reached out to flick the screen further, pulling up the other series they were watching. They were almost all long-running series they hadn’t seen before, with a few comfort comedies thrown in. Nothing caught his attention.

“What? Don’t want something that’ll make you cry?” Hera asked, making Kanan snort.

“I don’t think we’ve ever watched something that makes me cry.” When Hera broke into laughter, he did too. “I’m serious! We haven’t!”

Hera shushed him, putting her fingers ever so slightly over his mouth. “Okay, okay! I don’t believe you, but the kids are asleep and we don’t want to wake them up.”

Kanan hummed to himself, looking over the list. “Are we actually going to watch it, or are we just using it for background noise?”

He felt Hera shrug more than he saw it. “I don’t mind.”

Nodding to himself, Kanan hovered over West of Jeddha, an action film old enough that he could remember smuggling it into the Creche with Cal and Ferren. He didn’t say anything, just waiting for Hera to react.

Hera knew all of the layers of what he wasn’t asking. She settled back against the pillows, reaching to tap it herself.

She pulled him closer as the film loaded through.

The opening monologue was one Kanan knew maybe a little too well, mumbling the words as they were spoken in that one Outer Rim accent used in the films, the one that barely covered the actors’ own Core Worlds accents.

“Nothing we did could have saved us. People said we had to hope.” His voice dropped lower, crackling over the next words with over-exaggerated emotion. “No. Hope would get us nowhere. What we had to do was fight.”

Hera scoffed. “I hate that line. You might need to fight, but you still need hope. Otherwise you’d burn through your energy for the cause without accomplishing anything.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Kanan rolled his eyes, jabbing her in the side. “You say that every time we watch this.”

She hummed in quiet agreement, watching the opening credits roll. Kanan shuffled to get more comfortable before he spoke up again. “How was your day?”

“Busy,” Hera huffed to herself, reaching up to scratch her nails across the back of his head. Her fascination with his hair had its benefits. “Reports, meetings, planning. The same things I do every day, but still exhaustingly different.”

“That’s the nature of rebellion.” He didn’t bother keeping the infuriation out of his voice.

Hera shoved him slightly, fingers tickling across his side. “How was training?”

“It’s going well, I think,” he replied with a small frown, “Ezra learns quickly, but his focus is… well, it’s not great, is it?.” Again, Hera hummed in her agreement, nodding. “But I know he’s trying, and it seems to be going well, so I can’t complain.”

“Good,” Hera turned to press her lips to his forehead. “I’m glad, I was worried how it would go today after so many missions without a training session.”

Kanan shrugged. “Hey, every mission’s practice, even if it’s not the kind we’re hoping for.”

They fell quiet again, and Kanan let him become absorbed in the characters on screen. One, a monk who cared for the Temple of the Whills, was staring across a long, winding river covered in brightly dyed flowers. Around him were crowds of people, enjoying the festival of light and colour.

“If we ever get out of this,” he said quietly, not wanting to speak the words out loud, “we should visit Jeddha.”

There was a pause, but he could feel Hera watching him. “Did you go there? Before?”

‘Before’ was a tenuous concept, but one he felt settle around him. Something bubbled in his stomach, a feeling of deep sadness he took hold of for only a moment before releasing it with a long exhale.

“No. We talked about it, how we should go so I could visit the Whills - every Padawan back then did, at some point during their training - but, well…” He didn’t mean to trail off, but he couldn’t say out loud what he needed to say, “You know.”

Hera’s arms tensed around him, a comforting amount of pressure settling around his body. On screen, the monk had returned to the Temple. Red materials floated around him, caught on the same breeze as the smoke from the burning buildings just out of shot.

“Are you sleeping in here tonight?” Hera spoke just as quietly as he had done, as if the quiet felt important to her as well. “I might need to be up early, for a briefing with Ahsoka.”

Kanan just nodded, unwilling to break it. He settled himself further into her warmth, letting comfort wash over him like it rarely did. “Of course. Always.”

——-

Kanan woke when Hera stirred, twitching her legs as she finally woke up. He was alert instantly, but Hera took her time before leaving the confined space of their bed with a kiss on his temple. Moments later, she padded out of the room towards the fresher and the highly coveted water shower that was only available when they docked for long enough.

Kanan, on the other hand, preferred showering later in the day. Maybe it was the difference between her jobs and his, but he would rather wait until he had wrangled his unruly padawan into some kind of physical training, making him sweaty and actually in need of a shower.

And, besides, he had a plan to get on with. A very, very important plan.

He pulled himself upright, heading for the collection of clothing that sat in one of Hera’s draws (one that he maybe should count as his, but still didn’t). His trousers would be clean, there was no point replacing them, but he tried to change his shirt every day when he could.

He left his jumper on the floor where he’d thrown it the night before. It would be fine - it had survived worse.

He didn’t bother with his boots either, his socked feet padding quietly along the corridor to the living area.

The kitchen space on the Ghost was cramped, not great for cooking anything complex, but they made sure to keep it well-stocked for the crews’ favourites - including the recent addition of some spices Kanan had never heard of, but Kallus seemed to enjoy.

From the cupboard, he pulled the fluffy grains Hera preferred, and some of the flatter oats the kids did, settling for mixing the two together in the same pot with plenty of water and some powdered milk. Into there he added some of the seeds he’d left out to soak overnight to turned a sticky, pale pink. They would keep the porridge thick and silky, despite the lack of real milk they had on board.

As they cooked, the orange and red of the grains mixed with the blue of the milk, washing the whole meal out to a strange pink-grey. He dropped in a collection of sweet-spices at random, along with some sugar they had lying on the side.

Keeping half an eye on the pot, which was cooking slowly on the low heat, Kanan turned to the hydroponics unit on the opposite side. They had handfuls of berries and a few meiloorun they’d managed to steal from an Imperial supply line a few days before, and honestly, it was impressive any were left.

Slicing the fruit was meditative, the bubbling happening on the back, the smell of warmth and comfort. He could sink into the feeling of preparing breakfast for his partner, the kids, whatever Zeb counted as.

Moving meditation was not his favourite, but Kanan could appreciate it on a morning like this.

The door slid open, revealing a sleep clothing-clad Sabine, still rubbing her eyes. She looked, if anything, a little lost. “Kanan?”

“Hey, ad’ika.” Rex had called Sabine that when they first met, and the look on her face had made Kanan adopt it. He didn’t regret it yet. “Everything alright?”

Sabine’s hair fluttered as she shook her head, the blue and green of her fringe mixing from its neat lines. “I can’t find my paints.”

Kanan blinked at her, moving to stir the porridge again. “Isn’t it just in your room?”

“No!” The amount of pain in her voice - definitely a side effect of just waking up - showed her age in a way she normally didn’t. “I can’t find it anywhere, Kanan. I think Ezra moved it.”

He shook his head, not doubting it but also unwilling to wake Ezra and Zeb up to find out. He folded his hands over his arms, “You sure he moved it? You haven’t just run out because you keep ‘losing’ paint cans while we’re on missions?”

If looks could kill, Kanan would be thoroughly dead. “I’m pretty sure I would remember if I’d lost it all.”

“I’m not doubting that,” he hummed, smiling at her. “How about breakfast before we start looking?”

Sabine sighed for a moment, but sad down without argument. “Where’s Hera? She might have seen them.”

Kanan shook his head. “She’s busy today.”

It took a moment for Sabine to accept, but eventually, she pulled out her datapad and started to scroll through… whatever. Kanan turned back to the porridge, pulling it from the hob just as the door slid open again.

Hera made a happy noise, wrapping her hands around his waist. “Kanan, I could kiss you.”

He leaned over to oblige, just as Sabine called back, “Please don’t!”

Hera laughed pressing a kiss to one of his shoulders instead. “Thank you, love.”

Kanan just smiled. “I thought I’d give you more time to relax this morning.”

He ladled up two bowls, carrying them to the table. The door slid open again before he reached them, the padding and force signature reading as Zeb. He would serve himself whether Kanan let him or not, so he didn’t bother rushing back.

The Lasat was already holding his own bowl and the plate of fruit when Kanan turned around. “Thought I’d give y’ a hand.”

“Thanks, Zeb. Is Ezra up?” He was already heading to the door, assuming the answer already.

Zeb laughed. “That would be too easy, wouldn’t it?”

He could hear Hera and Sabine chipping into the conversation, but quickly shifted himself away. Ezra and Zeb’s room was further down the ship than his and Hera’s, but it wasn’t as if the ship had that much space anyway.

The door was open, propped open by what looked like one of Sabine’s paint crates. Ezra was on the top bunk, doing a rather good impression of a nesting tooka.

“Ezra,” Kanan said carefully, moving to nudge the boy awake. He didn’t have to do much physically, the Force bond between them prickling awake as he sent the feeling of morning towards the bundle of fabric and tuft of hair. “Breakfast’s ready - come on.”

Ezra rolled over to face him. He was still mostly covered, just letting his eyes show above the scrunch of blanket. “Do I have to?”

Kanan nodded. “Yeah, you do.” He reached out to ruffle Ezra’s hair, making him jump upright, still holding the quilt in front of him. “We should ask Sabine to cut your hair today as well - you said it was annoying you?”

He nodded. “Yeah, it’s a bit uncomfortable now.” There was nothing in his tone that explained what he meant, but the feeling of discomfort sparking at the other end of their training bond said enough.

And if more shielding practice was quietly added to Kanan’s list of necessary training, then so be it.

Kanan nodded. “I’ll let you get ready, then.” He reached down to take the crate - small, but strangely heavy - from where it blocked the door. Ezra wouldn’t get up unless he thought he had privacy, which Kanan already knew. “Come and join us soon, alright?”

He spotting the washed out, greying binder in the last second before he left. It meant a quick calculation of the training plan, but he tossed it to the fabric pile that was his padawan. “We have Force training today.”

He stepped out of the door before Ezra could reply, heading back along the corridor. Sabine’s room was locked, so he left the crate outside of her door, hoping beyond hope that Ezra wouldn’t be stupid enough to take it again.

Then, on his way back to the rec, and the food that was waiting for him, he stepped into the room he and Hera shared. As much as he would like to sit and have breakfast while the food was still warm, there were other things he needed to do to finish his plan of making Hera’s morning easier.

He made the bed quickly, just pulling the sheet over so it looked straight, before pulling out her flight suit and folding it onto the bed. Hera rarely wore it on a morning, content with being comfortable rather than trying to look the part, but she always wore it to briefings. On top of that, he placed the datapad she’d been reading from the day before. He took a moment, giving it one last look to make sure everything was there, before heading back on his day.

The kitchen itself was warm and full of laughter, making Kanan feel happiness in his bones.

“Sabine?” She looked up as Kanan spoke. “I’ve put your paints outside of your bedroom door. They were just in the hall.”

It was a blatant lie, and Sabine clocked it immediately, but she didn’t argue. “Thanks, Kanan.”

He smiled, collecting his bowl to sit down and eat. “Hey, since I’ve done you that favour, maybe you can do one for me.” Sabine gave him a hesitant nod, picking at the berries in front of her. “Can you cut Ezra’s hair today?”

Her face brightened. “Oh, yeah, sure. Easy.”

Speaking of the nightmare, the door slid open as Ezra stepped in, mostly dressed but still quite dishevelled. He would never have survived growing up at the Jedi Temple. He didn’t greet them past a half-wave, moving straight to the pan and the leftover porridge.

Hera shot Kanan a look, which made him shrug. If letting him be messy meant Ezra would get out of bed on a morning, he was happy to allow it.

When Ezra finally reached the table, Hera stood up to give him her seat “I should go and get ready for this briefing. Kanan, can I talk to you for a moment?”

It was not what he expected, but it was fine. “Sure,” he said with a smile, taking his bowl with him as he went to follow her. No sense leaving the porridge to get any colder.

Hera led him back to their shared room without any indication of why, just moving her way around their space. She didn’t necessarily look surprised when she saw the clothes ready for her, but her shoulders did melt a little. “You even found my datapad.”

Kanan shrugged. “It wasn’t hard to find. It was on the floor where you left it.”

“Still, Kay, you’re doing so much. You always do so much.”

Kanan stepped forward, pulling her into a hug before she could say anymore. Maybe it was because he needed to hide from the compliments, but he wasn’t comfortable letting Hera talk about him without holding her close.

Sadly, Hera could read him too well. She knew his deflection tactics and wasn’t about to let them stand. “Do you know how wonderful you are, Kanan? You do so much for this ship, for the crew. For our family.”

They only said it in the quiet of their room, when they knew the others couldn’t hear them. The weight of it settled on his shoulders.

“I like looking after you all,” Kanan muttered, pulling her closer so he was speaking directly against the top of her head. It was easier to talk like that. “Not that you need it. I like being, well…”

“Domestic?” Hera laughed, the vibrations making him warm. “I know you do. That doesn’t make it any less good.”

He shook his head. “I just made breakfast.”

“You found what I needed for this meeting, just because you could. You helped Sabine find her paints, without causing a fight. You organised a haircut for Ezra before his dysphoria got too bad, before I’d even realised - don’t argue with me, Kanan Jarrus, that isn’t me being hard on myself. Just me saying how incredible you are..” She shuffled backwards so she could see him, but her hands still rested on his arms. “Face it, love, you’ve done a lot this morning. And all of it is so incredibly helpful, I’m not sure how I’ll ever make it up to you.”

Kanan laughed, shrugging as he pulled her back in to press kisses over her chin and nose, up her cheeks, across her forehead and her lek, skipping the band of her head covering. “Watch the sequel to West of Jeddha with me tonight?”

Hera winced, which was fair. The sequel was awful, but he could make it up to her later.

“Please?”

She huffed as if it was a difficult decision. “Fine! Fine. I’ll do it. But you better find some more meiloorun in the next supply run.”

His laughter dropped, but not completely. “You have yourself a deal, Captain.”

Hera looked rather smug. “Good.”

[disregardcanon]

i did some star wars sequels rewrites today! i’m not going to sit here and say they’re good enough to make a whole new trilogy of movies around or anything, but i like them.

a few major changes include: kylo has some more consistent characterization and is the big bad, rose tico is a former stormtrooper (insert fic rec), and the stormtrooper revolution.

So, one important sequels change is that Snoke is his own character. He was a Palpatine sycophant who was eighteen years old when the chancellor became the emperor, and watched from a close advising position, studying how Palpatine managed to manipulate those around him and his use of the force. Palpatine figured him out quickly, of course, but Snoke’s ability with the force was far beneath him and at the time, his primary goal was keeping Palpatine in power. 

He studied the best tactics for keeping storm-troopers in line, the best ways for lording power over those with some and those with none, and he undertook extensive study on Darth Vader. He was able to figure out exactly who Darth Vader was, and he studied all available information on Anakin Skywalker. He figured out exactly the ways that Palpatine manipulated this man into becoming his guard dog, and took notes. Someday, he would need one of his own. Snoke was never exceedingly powerful- only smart. If he was powerful enough, he might have struck the Emperor down himself to get that power. 

After the fall of the Empire, he tracks down imperial loyalists and sets himself up a stronghold far enough out in the outer rim that no one from the New Republic is going to come to its rescue. He offers a spot of honor to Brendol Hux for implementing a stormtrooper program with stolen children. 

Then, he starts bribing territories to join them. He starts conquering. The First Order is becoming a small, but mighty force. By the time that Luke Skywalker’s Jedi school is gaining traction, he has his own small country. He goes to visit, claiming that he will be on the look out for force sensitive youths in his area. Luke does not trust him, at all, but allows him to stay a few days out of curtesy for a fellow force sensitive who isn’t an enemy combatant. 

Snoke’s strongest force power, similar to Ahsoka Tano, is reading force signatures. He is able to pick up on the the frustration and entitlement radiating off of young Ben Organa-Solo in waves. He whispers in the boy’s ear about the good old days, when he could have had a place of honor and power instead of a life of living in his mother and uncle’s shadows, without being able to utilize the full power of the force. 

He comes from the line of Darth Vader, after all. Most powerful man in the galaxy- able to have whatever he wants. Why should he be restricted to a children’s summer camp where he is only allowed to wave around wooden sticks? 

Little Rey, daughter of no one of importance beyond the love they gave her, feels something is wrong. She runs to Master Luke’s room and says that Ben feels wrong. Luke follows her to the door of Ben’s room, and feels the anger and resentment radiating off of him in waves- strong enough to kill. Strong enough that it means he will kill. 

Luke tells Rey to run to the room with the other children and then run to the ship to fly away. Then, he opens the door quickly and quietly. Luke tries to kill his sleeping nephew who feels like murder, and is instead knocked out with a force choke. 

“Master Snoke warned me that you would try to kill me,” Ben says, clamping his hand down so hard that it nearly ruptures the arteries in Luke’s throat. 

Rey hears the sound of children’s dying screams so close behind her that she’s too afraid to try to wake the other children- she just runs. Runs and runs and runs towards the ship that Luke was helping to teach her how to fly recently, and she runs until she can run up the stairs. 

She hears heavy breathing coming from behind her, and turns around. 

“Little Rey,” Ben says, smile quirking on his lips, “it figures you’d be the one to survive. You were always stronger than the others.” She feels her breath hitch in her throat. 

“I don’t think that I’ll kill you,” he says, “I think I could use an apprentice.” She pushes sideways, hitting at the button that closes the hatch. He rips out his lightsaber with a hiss, crystal corrupted to a bright red, and slashes at the door of the Millenium Falcon. 

Rey hears the hissing as he grinds at the metal, and she rushes through the halls to the pilot’s chair, gearing up the ship. Then, she pushes the button forward. She flies and flies, adrenaline coursing through her veins- before she lands on the deserted planet of Jakku. 

She blocks out her memories of the temple, and makes a home of her ruined ship as she tries to get it flying again. 

She eventually gets it back to the point where it’s functional, but she’s afraid enough that she doesn’t fly it- until Finn shows up. 

That’s how they get the Falcon. The rest of the plot doesn’t change for the rest of the first movie. 

Cue Beginning of the Second Movie

Finn has been in a coma for three months, Page Tico is returning to the Resistance after a few months of shore-leave with a sister that no one knew existed, and Rey has been training with Luke and now is Good At Lightsaber Force Ways.

Kylo Ren is caught in a depressive, angry, tantrum funk because lo and behold, killing his dad didn’t magically make any feelings go away. It just made him feel gross and angry and it didn’t get him any closer to his goals. He monologues at his burnt to a crisp Darth Vader mask. He destroys First Order property. He force chokes some guys. 

Snoke is like. Okay. We gotta channel this into something productive. The goddamn primadonna is destroying all my plans. And he notices that Kylo is obsessing over this one girl and is like. Okay let’s channel that into a Padme Amidala thing. Sew the seeds of Darth Vader’s obsession with one woman who led him to the Dark Side and how this is a perfectly normal, dark side thing just as long as he GETS HER. This will keep Kylo focused on one, small side quest and away from that Maybe I Should Just Kill the Old Bastard And Be Done With It thoughts that Snoke has been feeling coming off of him. 

I don’t have the whole plot thing down, because I doing this for fun and free on the internet, but the main things are

1. Rose is a former storm trooper who was inspired by Finn to desert the First Order and help the Resistance. She just lost the girl who took her in and called her sister, and she is angry and frustrated with Finn that he’s not immediately the person that she wants him to be. 

2. Rey doesn’t believe that Kylo needs to be redeemed, but that he needs to be confronted. She goes with him to beat Snoke, then he tries to convince her to come with him because she is a “nobody” who was left with Luke to train, and if Luke had bothered to track her down after she escaped with the Falcon instead of fucking off to exile she wouldn’t have grown up alone. He is “the only one who understand her” and the “only one who loves her” and Rey doesn’t buy into it and gets tf out. 

3. One of the most important conversations in the film is between Rey and Luke, as he tells her the true story of Anakin Skywalker, and how his love for Luke finally brought him back from evil. 

4. As the newly appointed Supreme Leader, Kylo decides that his goal is to get rid of the people who still hold claims to the legacies he wants solely for him (his mom and uncle) need to die, and that he will get Rey and rule the galaxy. 

5. Rey and Finn reunite with the Resistance base, and they talk about some Revelations and hug tf out of each other. They lose the base and Luke dies, checking off one of Kylo’s to-do list. 

6. Leia moves the base to a new location, and says that soon, she will face her son herself. She brought this terror into the world, and she’ll take it out of it. 

The next one opens with Finn, Rose, and Poe leading an assault on a storm trooper training facility, where they free children and convince an older battalion led by Jannah to desert and join the cause. 

The climax comes when the protagonists break up into 2 groups- the ones who will infiltrate the ranks of the stormtroopers and turn them against the brass, and then Leia and Rey, who will allow themselves to be captured and take down Kylo Ren themselves. They allow themselves to be dragged to his new chambers and he like, shows off all the opulence of Rule ™. 

“Don’t you think that I’ve done well for myself, mother?” 

“You’ve certainly done something,” she mutters. 

“I am the heir to the legacies of Vader, Skywalker, Organa, and Amidala,” he says, haughty and entitled, “who better to rule the galaxy? With my own queen by my side, of course,” He sends Rey a look, and she rolls her eyes at him. 

“I taught you nothing, didn’t I?” Leia asks. 

“Considering that you were never around, yes,” he says. He goes onto claim that he was a self-made man, all the while calling claim to the legacies that he’s “entitled” to. 

“I wasn’t present enough, I will admit,” she says, “but you’ve outworn my sympathy. And my regret.” 

“Leaving me with an uncle who treated me just like any other student,” Kylo Ren seethes, “you only did what a mother should, right? Ignoring her child.” He was special; why didn’t anyone treat him that way?

“I wasn’t perfect,” she says, “but I didn’t cause this, Ben. You did this yourself. Just like your grandfather.” Kylo takes out his lightsaber, and he stabs. He twists it, and he brings the blade back in. Leia falls to the ground, dead.

Rey lets out a scream, because this monster- he thinks that he can just kill everyone because they didn’t treat him enough like a king. He’s killed both of his parents, people that Rey is sure she loves far more than he ever did.

Rey struggles against the hold of those stormtroopers and lets out a growl. 

“You are a monster,” she hisses. 

“One that you’ll come to love,” he says, and there’s a smile on his face. He’s run his mother through and he’s smiling. 

“I will never love you,” she spits. He shakes his head indulgently, and walks towards her. He puts a hand gently under chin, tilting it upwards to look him in the eyes. 

“Once I destroy that stormtrooper,” he says, “you’ll have no other choice. There will just be me, the only one who deserves your love.” Rey has been a feral, desert creature for most of her life, and she leans forward, mouth bumping against the fragile skin of his inner arm. 

Then, she leans in and chomps down in a devastating bite. This time, it’s Ren’s turn to howl in pain. 

He reaches in the force for her blue lightsaber, and clutches it in his hand. 

“This was my grandfather’s, you know,” he says, “it’s finally back in the right hands.” Rey smiles, big and wide and nasty. 

“He would hate the man that you’ve become,” she says, smashing the red blade into his blue one. Then, as they fight, she goes on to spin the story of Anakin Skywalker, a loving man who fell down a dark path to try to save the one person he felt hadn’t betrayed him and his unborn child, who spent years an emotionless husk before he finally saved Luke’s life, defying his master for love and love alone. 

“You killed the people who loved you for power,” she says, “Anakin Skywalker would be so disappointed in you.” Kylo hisses, and he misses her blow for one that cuts her along the arm. 

“I love you,” Kylo says. Rey shakes her head.

“You don’t know what love is,” she says. This is where the “team turn the stormtroopers against the brass” come in. Finn, Rose, Poe and their stormtrooper brigade has been working through the ship, culling the officers who were children of imperial officers who thought that it was alright to steal other people’s children to mold into the soldiers to fight the wars keeping them in power. 

Finn bursts open the door to the throne room, and Kylo and Rey both turn their heads to see him for a moment. 

“Oh,” Kylo Ren says, “it’s just your stormtrooper.” 

“His name is Finn,” Rey hisses, but Kylo just keeps laughing. How insignificant. Nothing but a stormtrooper- a nameless, worthless soldier designed to keep those worth more in power. Rey growls, and continues their fight. 

Finn can tell that he’s being completely ignored by Kylo, and runs in close. He sets off a blaster bolt in Ren’s direction. 

Though Ren is perfectly capable of stopping a bolt mid-air, he doesn’t even notice it coming until it cuts into his back. 

He falls to the ground in excruciating pain. He starts screaming, and tear-drops fall down his face. 

“The stormtrooper did this?” he squeals. Rey smiles down at him, and nods. Finn walks up beside her, and takes her hand in his. 

“But you’re nothing,” he says, “you’re not force sensitive, not royal-” Finn puts his boot to Kylo’s chest, and pushes him down. This stormtrooper doesn’t even have the gift of Kylo’s love that makes Rey special. He’s nothing.

“I’m not,” he says, “I’m just a stormtrooper.” He’s wearing a jacket that looks all too familiar- and Kylo’s breath hitches as he realizes that’s his father’s jacket. Nobody, smuggler Han Solo. 

The troopers that restrained Rey look between themselves, then they throw down their guns, and rip off their helmets. 

“We’re with you, FN-2187,” a woman with medium brown skin and black hair says, smiling widely. Finn nods at her, and smiles. 

“No,” Kylo says, shaking his head even as he feels the life leaving him, “this- this can’t be. I’m special. This was all supposed to be mine.” The new Empire- the legacy- the stormtroopers- the love and devotion of the most powerful force user of a generation. 

They were supposed to be his. How has this Finn taken everything from him?

What Kylo doesn’t understand is that Finn and Rey looked at each other, and decided that they were worth something; they were the first ones who ever did that for each other, and there’s a bond there too deep for anyone to wrest from their hands.

Rey smiles, and kisses Finn on the lips. Then, she kicks Kylo in the head. He doesn’t ever wake up. 

After that, Finn and Rose start a program that helps match former stormtroopers with job opportunities and lives in the new republic, that runs adjacent to Rey’s home for wayfaring force sensitives. Poe collaborates with both of them, flying new recruits back and forth from where they’re coming from to when they’re going and starts campaigning for the importance of a proper air force in the nascent new republic, and other people- politicians, start building it. 

The heroes of this war are going to work more from the ground to try to undo the damage that was already done. Someone else can try to make sure that governments happen and don’t collapse.

[wallisjewellie]

Original Obidala concept by Lucas

Hear me out on the original Obidala concept by George Lucas.

Having read it, three things are obvious to me:

1. Padmé is an even more powerful and precious character than she appears to be based on the traits she exhibits in The Phantom Menace.

2. She and Obi-Wan have a more central role in the original plot (both together and separately) than in the final version.

3. While Padmé has a rather significant and overt attraction towards Obi-Wan (who does not seem to reciprocate it, but certainly notices it), she demonstrates contempt and disdain towards Anakin.

Here I only present the parts which are relevant concerning the Obidala and Anidala pairings. For the entire text please refer to the following source: http://fd.noneinc.com/secrethistoryofstarwarscom/secrethistoryofstarwars.com/thebeginning.html

“Qui Gon did not enter the film until the Coruscant section and so it is mainly the story of Obi Wan Kenobi, an older, full Jedi Knight, who uncovers the invasion of Utapau (Naboo in the film), rescues the queen, lands on Tatooine and recruits a young boy named Anakin Skywalker to become a Jedi. [...]

Below is the collection of annotations from the CD-ROM. These [are] transcribed nearly word-for-word from the CD. Enjoy reading the earliest version of Episode I: The Beginning.

Before it was known as "The Phantom Menace," the working title of Episode I was simply "The Beginning." [...] In the revised rough draft, the [opening] scroll reads:

"It is a time of decay in the Republic. The taxation of trade routes to the tiny planet of Utapau is in dispute. Hoping to force a resolution with a blockade of deadly Star Destroyers, the greedy Federation of Galactic Traders has cut off all shipping and supplies to the small, peaceful planet. While the Congress of the Republic endlessly debates the alarming chain of events, the Supreme Chancellor has secretly dispatched a young Jedi Knight to settle the conflict...."

Naboo is known as Utapau.

It is only Obi-Wan who is sent to investigate the trade dispute. Qui-Gon doesn't appear until much later. Obi-Wan's characterization was essentially what became Qui-Gon in the final film, having many of the same lines and mannerisms. Obi-Wan is described as being about thirty years old and wears all black. [...]

Amidala's age is "hard to determine, but she is a young woman." [Editor’s remark: therefore NOT a child queen. Her age possibly corresponds to the age of actress Natalie Portman at that time.] While her planet is called Utapau, the people she rules over are referred to as the "people of Naboo." [...]

The actual invasion of Theed (or Naboo City) is more detailed in the revised rough draft. [...] There is more racial tension between the Gungans and the Naboo. Amidala tries to prevent Jar Jar from entering her ship. Obi-Wan argues and wins the point, but Amidala insists that the Gungan be kept in the droid hold. Racial prejudice had been considered a factor in the fall of the Republic for a long time. It was mentioned in the second draft of A New Hope, which stated that the founders of the Empire incited race wars. [...]

Upon Tatooine's arrival in the revised rough draft, Obi-Wan - dressed as a moisture farmer - leads the group into Mos Espa since Qui-Gon hadn't appeared at this point. [...] Just as in the film, Padme joins the group at the request of the Queen.

There are hints of a Padme crush on Obi-Wan. When Kenobi argued with "Amidala" about Jar Jar on Naboo, Padme was impressed that Obi-Wan was able to stand up to the "Queen". As they enter Mos Espa, she "gives Obi-Wan a long, adoring look." In Mos Espa, Padme watches Kenobi with interest and respect, making Kenobi very nervous.

Padme is well-trained in self-defense. Upon entering Mos Espa, she is grabbed by a creature. She hits the creature, causing it to double over in pain. This attracts the attention of the local merchants, and they clear the way for the entourage. Obi-Wan warns Padme to save her skills until they are truly needed.

When Anakin meets Padme, there is no mention of Jar Jar's clumsy antics with the little droid in the shop. Also in this draft, Anakin announces to Padmé that he will marry her someday. [...]

The dinner occurrences take place differently in the revised rough draft. While Padme, Obi-Wan, Shmi and Jar Jar eat together, Anakin is outside working on the podracer. Padme questions Obi-wan's decision to put their fate in Anakin's hands. She is obviously upset about this, and decides to take Anakin something to eat. [...]

Outside, Padmé thanks Anakin for helping them. Anakin admits that he was seeking a way to enter the podrace without losing his vehicle to Watto, who can claim ownership over everything that Anakin possesses. By this reasoning, Anakin displays more unusual wisdom for a boy his age in saying:

ANAKIN: We're helping each other. That's the natural way of things.

Padmé asks Anakin if slavery is natural too.

ANAKIN: Of course not. But the stupidity of many creatures is.

Padmé confesses that she has never met anyone like Anakin. Returning the sentiment, Anakin leans over and gives Padmé a kiss on the cheek. [Editor’s remark: in the concept art it is obvious that Padmé is taken aback by this bold act, pulling away with a surprised, wide-eyed look on her face. https://www.thethings.com/15-surprising-ways-the-phantom-menace-was-almost-a-very-different-movie/]

[...] Just before they depart for the podrace, Padme notices Obi-Wan staring out a window of the hovel.

PADME: You look like you're trying to solve the problems of the universe.

OBI-WAN: Only our own, but maybe they will become the problems of the universe. I don't know...

It appears that Obi-Wan senses that this seemingly small-scale struggle will have larger, darker ramifications for the galaxy as a whole. [...]

After Obi-Wan cuts down the Sith probe, he identifies it for Anakin. [...] Obi-Wan and Darth Maul are the ones to duel, and they exhibit much more Jedi powers than do Qui-Gon and Maul in the final film. [...] Obi-Wan discusses his mysterious attacker with Panaka and Padmé. Obi-wan suspects Maul to be a Sith, though they all agree that the Sith should no longer exist. [...]

The Queen exhibits the same disdain for "strays" as Obi-Wan does in the final film, but to a great degree. Not only is she not pleased with having Jar Jar on her ship, but also feels the same way about Anakin.

AMIDALA: Must we pick up every strange creature along the way? Our journey is most serious and perilous. The fate of an entire people is at stake here.

OBI-WAN: I am an agent of the Republic, and the boy falls under the same protection as you.

The Queen concedes the debate.

Qui-Gon Jinn's first scene is here on the landing platform on Coruscant, standing alongside Palpatine and Valorum. [...] In introducing Qui-Gon to his Jar Jar, Obi-Wan says, "He is my mentor and good friend.” [...]

Before returning to Utapau, Amidala, Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Palpatine, Panaka, and the handmaiden Eirte discuss strategy. The situation has become desperate, as all government officials have been imprisoned and food and water supplies run dangerously low. Palpatine also fears that some senators will continue to try and block Amidala's appearance before the Senate, thus stalling any action. Qui-Gon tells the Queen that both he and Obi-Wan have been assigned to protect her.

Amidala decides that she and her followers will attempt to retake possession of Utapau. Her plan is to organize the populace and attack the Traders in any way possible. Nearly everyone disagrees with the course of action, including Obi-Wan, who points out that the Naboo are untrained, poorly equipped, and unprepared to fight the droid army. [...] She then decides to return to Utapau. [...]

Palpatine tells Valorum of the Queen's plans to take back her planet. Valorum thinks the Queen is "very reckless" in doing this, but Palpatine says that she is merely "bold". Frustrated, Valorum resolves to "force the Senate to take up this issue before it turns into a disaster" for Palpatine and his people. This confrontation with the Senate, however, eventually leads to his removal from office by the end of the story, and Palpatine replaces him. [...]

The heroes meet with a small group of "Rebels" prior to the final battle. This meeting takes place in a hidden Rebel headquarters, and is attended by Anakin, R2, Padme, Eirtae, Amidala, Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and Panaka. It is also attended by the Rebel leaders Captain Autter and Captain Ural. During this scene, Padme steps forward and reveals, "The Queen has been using her surrogate on this trip." [...]

Obi-Wan and Padme agree to allow Anakin to participate in the battle. Padme invites Anakin and R2 to join her in 2-person starfighter. While Anakin familiarizes himself with the controls, Padme flies them into the battle. But, when Anakin spots the massive Traders' Star Destroyers, Anakin voices his doubts about the attack. Padme says, "We will disable them or drive them off. If we don't our ground forces will not succeed..." When Anakin asks her how such a feat is possible, she replies by telling him that they will rely on faith. [...]

In order to defeat the Trader's army, Padme and Anakin realize that they must first find and destroy the battleship responsible for emitting the signals to the droid army. [...]

Qui-Gon confronts Darth Maul alone when Obi-Wan is pushed off the gantry. As Kenobi hurries to rejoin the fight, the energetic Maul quickly wears down Obi-Wan's mentor. Eventually, Qui-Gon slips and is cut down. Obi-Wan and Maul then clash in the complex. Battle droids attempt to enter into the facility and aid Maul, but Kenobi uses the Force to "slam the door shut, crushing several droids in the process". [...] Eventually, the battle droids do make their way into the facility. Distracted by these new arrivals, Obi-Wan is nearly killed by Maul. [...] When Maul attempts to cut Obi-Wan in half, the Jedi leaps right into the midst of the battle droids.

Soon afterwards, Padme and Anakin destroy the primary droid control ship, and the battle droids in the generator area begin running into the walls. As Maul wades through the droids, cutting them down in his quest to kill Kenobi, the Jedi uses the Force to hurl droids at his enemy. Finally, they stand face-to-face.

OBI-WAN: Your style of fighting is old, but I understand it now.

MAUL: You learn fast.

OBI-WAN: You don't bother to learn.

MAUL: I don't have to.

Before Maul can act, Kenobi lashes out and cuts the Sith warrior in half. He studies his fallen enemy and says: "Learn not...live not, my master always says."

Meanwhile, Anakin and Padme spot on heavily-armed battleship, and believe it to be the command ship. They prepare to attack the pilot's tower, but the tower's deflector shields prove incredibly strong. Padme orders two pilots, Teeter and Potts, to attack the ship's shield generator. They are successful in damaging the shields. Then, while Anakin pilots the ship, Padme serves as gunner. Despite the heavy flak surrounding them, Padme remains focused on her objective. As the deflector shield fluctuates, she fires several missiles, which destroy the control tower and cause the chain reaction that obliterates the command ship.

[quicksiluers]

Ok, under the read more I’m gonna do my general thoughts for rise of skywalker...there’s a lot here folks. spoilers beware~~

oh boy...where so we begin with this

it is clear, and this movie makes it even more obvious, that LF or whoever is running the movies over there had no set plan for this new trilogy. There is no through-line with these movies like the other 2 trilogies had. With the OT, it was “Empire vs. Rebellion, Jedi vs. Sith, Father vs. Son” with other points sprinkled in. But these were the main points. With the prequels, it was “The story of Anakin Skywalker and how his fall brought along the rise of the empire and destruction of the sith” now it may not have been executed well in cases (the ideas are there, the execution in some of the movies is not) but that is your core idea. 

What are the points in this new trilogy? What is new about these movies that we haven’t seen before from the other two? I’m not saying it’s bad to have recognizable things in the new movies, of course not. But there needs to be a purpose. Where have we progressed in this galaxy with these movies? The galaxy is back to exactly how it was after return of the jedi. Where is the progression? 

That is my biggest problem with the movie, it has so much going on in it. It tries to shove in two movies into one movie. It ignores the last jedi completely basically aside from a few things. And even though I don’t like TLJ that much (having just rewatched it recently, it just doesn’t work for me), you can’t just...ignore it outright like this movie and expect the trilogy to feel like it flows. Cause it doesn’t. 

Nothing is thought out. The ideas they have are presented and then left to the wayside. There are so many different plot elements that have potential that go NOWHERE and you wonder why it was brought up in the first place. 

Anyway, points about the movie

this is the poe, rey, finn dynamic i wish we got to see more of. it’s not developed enough and i just like see all these actors together. you can tell they are having a good time and the potential for these relationships is interesting. but again, it’s stuffed into one movie, so there is only so much they can do and it’s a bummer. 

i liked the new characters we got, it’s too late and i’m too lazy to look up the names, but again....this is the 3rd movie of the trilogy. Why are we introducing them now when we should be focusing on our main characters? None the less, they are really cool and have potential in maybe a book or comic

“you’re a palpatine” i’ve never snorted so badly in my LIFE. y’all...and when they kept bringing it up, I couldn’t help but shake my head. Again, another thing not set up and just shoved in last minute. 

I’m gonna be straight with ya, I don’t love kylo/ben. not a fav of mine. but even i could see homeboy was almost given NOTHING to do in this movie. and then you know, he turns good and then gets shoved DOWN A HOLE AND LIVES?? which makes....i mean, everyone in these movies gets shoved down a hole and lives. Anyway and then he saves Rey and they kiss (which yeah it’s a no from me but w/e I try to ignore shipping things) and then he just DIES AND DISAPPEARS. and Rey has nOoOOoOO reaction to it. Like what lol I mean...again, this movie moves at such a pace that it just doesn’t sit with these things

Ok so the jedi voices, I am for sure I heard Anakin (hayden i heard you sweetie and i love you), Mace W, Yoda, Luke, I think I heard Obi-Wan?? But I have to listen again cause it didn’t sound like Ewan....but it could have been maybe a mix of him and Alec?? Someone mentioned you could hear Ahsoka, I didn’t catch that but hey. BUT MY BOY QUI-GON JINN MADE IT. Which just makes me hopefully that they can bring him back for the Kenobi show because I need it like a lifeline right now

A w/e thing but I felt like the lightsaber fights were...kinda meh? I mean, there were about...2 or 3 of them but they just seemed so generic. I know people rag of the prequels for them being too “scripted” but you felt those fights. Nothing in these new movies has matched up to the darth maul, obi-wan/anakin, or luke/vader fight. Maybe the one in the snow for TFA, but other than that. There’s no consequences to these fights. In the Darth Maul fight, Qui-Gon is killed, Darth Maul gets chopped in half (and then goes on later to basically be the biggest thorn in Obi-Wan’s side) and Obi-Wan swears to Qui-Gon that he will train Anakin. Huge stuff! In the Anakin/Obi-Wan fight, you’ve got brother vs. brother and in the end Anakin gets burned alive and lost multiple parts of his body and Obi-Wan walks devastated and also just assuming Anakin will die...but he’ll then go on to be one of the biggest threats in the galaxy. And with the Luke/Vader fight, Luke loses his hand and learns the truth about his father and it throws him. And in their second fight, Luke is almost taken over by anger but stops and proclaims he would never join the dark side. And then Vader saves him. What do any of these fights do in this movie? Rey stabs Kylo but then she just...heals him and then flies away. It doesn’t help that they try to intercut it with Leia here, but I understand why this was a struggle with the movie due to Carrie’s unfortunate passing. 

The movie did have some nice shots, I’m trying not to be so negative about this thing....but I just don’t know. It probably doesn’t help that we just had another FANTASTIC deborah chow episode of the mandalorian and that was far more enjoyable to me than this. In the last 5 minutes alone of episode 7 of mando, I felt more emotions there then any time in this movie. 

Anyway, that’s really all I have to say on the subject. Check it out for yourselves and make up your mind. As for me, I’m good with the Disney+ content we have right now. Mando is finishing up, we get clone wars in the early quarter of next year and Kenobi begins to film next year....and we’ll be getting a 2nd season of Mando sometime! And with those things, I’m happy with it

[bereft-of-frogs]

Not that I think Kylo was irredeemable it something, but I honestly don’t think he redeemed himself, or even like... tried to. In the Last Jedi he sort of kind of pauses when Leia almost dies, but then plows on killing people. Then in this most recent movie he pauses, gets stabbed and is put in a position where he can’t really kill anyone else, only for Han to show up and they talk, ignoring the fact that last time Han tried that Kylo killed him. Then Kylo rushes off to kill Palpatine. (Part 1)

(Part 2, sorry it got long) basically Kylo was planning on killing Papletine anyways and always wanted to rule(marry/date?) Rey. Like if Rey has turned Sith, I feel like that end would have played out the exact same way. So basically I’m sitting here like: Kylo never actually redeemed himself (saving a girl who you tried to kill multiple times and tortured and killed her friends doesn’t really count in my mind. Like it’s a start ?maybe??). Anyways I generally respect your opinion so I was...            

(Part 3) (sorry...). Anyways I was wondering if you could explain why you thought Kylo had redeemed himself. I feel like you’re less likely to be in my face about how it’s cause he was actually Good All Along or some other weird reason. 

- - - -

Okay folks, the thing is...I really don’t want to talk about Star Wars. I really don’t. That’s probably sounds kind of asshole-ish but this is a nicer response than I just had with my real life friends. (To be fair, that conversation *started* with Friend 1: “oh how did you like that godawful movie?” Friend 2: “ugh that was such a bad movie” and every time I was like ‘well I liked-’ they came back with ‘ugh but what really made it bad was...’ until I just kind of snapped and was like I Do Not Want To Talk About This.) Like, maybe one day I’ll want to participate more in the actual fandom (unlikely, but it’s possible) but for right now, I just. Can’t. So this is the one and only ask I am answering publicly about this. I’m going to talk briefly about what I was referring to this morning and then just go back to the world where I just...watch the movies and participate in no other way.

So what I was really referring to this morning were the posts that referred to Kylo Ren/Ben Solo as irredeemable (which I personally believe that no one is ever irredeemable) and people who ship Reylo as ‘crazy’ or ‘disgusting’ or anything that refers to them as clowns. (I really hate the clown thing? I don’t know why maybe because I don’t like clowns in general but I’ve seen ‘clowns’ tossed around a lot lately and I’m like...oof) That doesn’t necessarily mean I think that the plotline was perfect. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have liked to see certain things done differently.

And I don’t think Kylo Ren ‘redeemed himself.’ Because he died. They killed him off. You’re right, it was a perhaps start, but the storytellers decided not to allow that character to continue to work towards reconciliation. And even if he did live, that might not make for a good film. Because the actual work of reconciliation, including what people put in ‘what a redemption arc should be’ type posts, is a lot of quiet, slow work. So films tend to go with one large, dramatic moment at the climax of the story. Tied to a personal reasons, maybe not precisely for the right reasons, but getting one last choice and choosing to do the right thing (and then, unfortunately, they usually die, but that sucks)...

Just like Darth Vader.

I think that’s something that really inspired that post. Just that...having seen the movie I’m puzzled by the intensity of the negative reaction to the character. Because I overall think he was fairly...middle of the road in terms of Star Wars villains and his story was clearly echoing Anakin’s/Vader’s...and also Rey and Ben had...a wayyy more interesting dynamic than Anakin and Padme in the prequels. I mean low bar but still. I was livetexting my brother about that today, Attack of the Clones is kind of hilariously cringey in that regard. Examples to try to be humorous in the middle of my slightly moody post: 

And like. I know people hated the prequels and I’m sure that there were people that were annoyed when Return of the Jedi came out but...I don’t know, I guess what I see here is a character/pairing with potential that could be interesting to explore further but also has a terrifying, really intense, concentrated negative energy around it and that’s kind of what puzzles me.

There’s probably more I could say about this. I definitely don’t think he was ‘good all along’ but I do think he struggled with wanting to make good decisions but consistently defaulting to fear, and desire for power, and the dark side. So I think that’s the purpose of those little flickers of uncertainty in the last movie, and this one. Leading up to his final, definitive turn towards the light, a last noble act, and, if he lived, a long road of learning how to be a better person, to make ‘good’ decisions. (And he’d probably make more mistakes. He’d probably sometimes do the right thing for the wrong reasons. That’s what this struggle is about.) I don’t know. I just think it’s interesting.

Anyway! That is it for me and the Star Wars discourse! Sorry! Officially last word! Sorry!

[legendsofthegffa]

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

A Satisfying Conclusion to the Sequel Trilogy, But an Underwhelming Finale to the Skywalker Saga

**SPOILERS!**

Well folks, here we are; four years ago, Episode VII came out and, despite leaning very heavily on nostalgia, still proved to be an exciting new beginning for Star Wars on the big screen. Three years ago, we saw Rogue One, which has proven to be a film that I enjoy more with each viewing. Two years ago, Episode VIII divided the fan base in a way not seen since Episode I, and proved to be an emotionally trying film for me personally. A year ago, we were without a Star Wars film, as Solo had already come out, and unfortunately had been caught up in the backlash against The Last Jedi, despite being a solid film in its own right. And now here we are with Episode IX; an exciting and enjoyable film, but one that stumbles to deliver on forty years worth of films and storytelling.

Rather than go into the plot, I want to touch on various aspects kind of like I did with my review of The Last Jedi; in this way, I can address some of my thoughts, critiques and predictions from that film as well as about the Sequel trilogy as a whole. First and foremost, let’s look at the biggest and probably most controversial aspect of the film: Palpatine. Making Darth Sidious the final villain was an excellent choice as a means of tying all nine films together; where it stumbles in his sudden and inexplicable return. As a hardcore Star Wars fan who liked the original story of the Emperor’s return in Legends, I was fine with them doing the same thing in the movies; while I do wish Snoke had returned instead (would have really been that hard to hand-wave Snoke’s return? It would have established him as having powers that Sidious didn’t, would have turned him from the joke that he became back into a serious villain, and would have given this trilogy its own unique feel, rather than the post-script that it ultimately was). Unfortunately, one of the core tenets of this film seems to be doing damage control for Episode VIII, rather than allowing it to tell its own story. While I appreciate that in other aspects, Snoke and Sidious is one place where I wish they had stayed the course rather than appeasing the really-sour fans that take their dislike of the film to new levels. 

So with that spiel out of the way, let’s get into Palpatine proper. We don’t get any definitive answer to how he returned, but the body he’s inhabiting his decrepit and corpse-like, suspended from a mechanical arm (which, in all of the reviews I have seen of the movie, have yet to mention that it looks like Megatron’s setup from Beast Machines), and missing fingers. My guess, and we’ll get into this more when we look at the quote-unquote “build-up” for his return in the EU, is that he managed to transfer his spirit into a clone body, but the body can’t handle Sidious’ dark side power and is wasting away. When Kylo comes to confront him, we learn that Sidious has been manipulating Ben for years, including creating and using Snoke as a puppet to train Kylo Ren and speaking to him as his grandfather, Darth Vader. His plan (such as it is), is to either get Kylo to kill Rey, before I can only presume draining his life-force after proving he was the stronger Force-user, or getting Rey to kill him so that his power will pass into her and she will take his place as Sith Empress of the galaxy. Ultimately, neither of those things happens, and he ends up draining the life of both Ben and Rey to regenerate himself, but even for Palpatine this seems like a messy and convoluted “plan”. 

Speaking of the “plan”, lets look at the hints that were laid since 2015, now that we know what it’s all been “leading towards”. We know that Palpatine was looking to expand into the Unknown Regions due to sensing a strong dark side-presence there; while at first we all believed this to be Snoke, but now it seems to be the planet of Exogal. What comes next is a muddled and uncertain, but at some point Sidious seems to have found this planet and set up his ultimate fail safes: a duplicate body for him to inhabit should he die, and a cult of ultra-loyal and dedicated Sith adherents to serve as his attendants, instruments and Final Order. The events of the Original Trilogy occur, and after Palpatine is killed by Vader, he puts some of his other contingency orders into effect: Operation: Cinder, and laying the groundwork for the First Order (which we now know has just been a front for the Final Order). The Emperor believed that if he was killed, then the Empire and the rest of the galaxy deserved to burn; had this gone on without a hitch, its likely Palpatine would have returned with his combined forces of ultra-loyal followers once he had regained his power and swept up the remnants of the galaxy beneath him. However, the New Republic and some of the Imperials interfered in his plans and prevented Operation: Cinder from being carried out, as well as forcing the Empire’s surrender at the Battle of Jakku.

Now, its likely that as with in Legends, Palpatine’s clone body couldn’t handle so much dark side power, and this is why he looked like a corpse in the film: if this is his one-and-only perfect clone body, then its probably been wasting away since day one, and even if he’s been able to keep transferring his body, its clear that this is not a long-term solution, unlike in Legends, where Palpatine was fine with transferring his essence to fresh clones until that plan was sabotaged by his supposedly-loyal underlings. Either way, with his body wasting away, Sidious needs to either transfer his power to his chosen vessel i.e. his granddaughter, Rey, or he needs both Rey and Kylo Ren so he can draw on their Force-bond (which is a whole other thing that I’m not even sure how to address in this review) to regenerate himself. Ultimately, he winds up nearly killing Rey and Ben Solo before Rey is able to redirect his Force Lightning back at him and cause him to destroy himself; his final defeat is one of the weaker aspects of the film, but I’ll get into that more in a bit. While Palpatine’s return was great, and can be made to fit with everything that has been leading up to Episode IX, there is no denying that at the end of the day Sidious’ inclusion will always feel like a messy addition at best, and empty fan service at worst.

Now, with that long-winded look at Palpatine out of the way, let’s move on to… a…different…Palpatine….who’s also a Skywalker…Rey, I mean Rey. Rey Palpatine is one of those base-breaking decisions that seem to be ever-present in Star Wars these days: some people feel that the evidence supports it, others feel that it’s a random pull for the sake of “subverting expectations”. Where do I stand? I think there is juuuust enough wiggle room within Episodes VII and VIII to leave it ambiguous enough for me to accept the answer. The biggest question I’ve seen is where the heck Palpatine’s son was this entire time, and I definitely think that that is an interesting story to be told, especially in regards as to whether or not he (and his wife, for that matter) were Force-sensitive. Me personally, I would have preferred it if Rey was the reincarnation of Anakin – being sent back to complete their task and bring balance to the Force. Some people also have issues with her rejecting her name and choosing to call herself a Skywalker but 1) at first, I honestly thought she was going to call herself Solo, just because Han was the first of the three she met and he seemed to have had the most influence on her (along with Luke) 2) I think the Hitler parallel is perfectly app here, most especially because Hitler was one of Lucas’ inspirations for Palpatine, and no one in their right mind would go around the galaxy with the last name that was equivalent to Hitler, regardless of how much good she did (for crying out loud, Leia was forced out of politics because the galaxy found out who her father was), so I don’t really have a problem with her changing it, and 3) with the Skywalker bloodline now (most likely) extinct, I think it’s good to have someone to carry that torch forward, along with the Jedi. As for her ultimate ending, well, that still remains to be seen. Rey Skywalker now has her own, orange lightsaber, and a brand-new galaxy to explore and rebuild. I’ve heard that Daisy Ridely is done with Star Wars, and while that makes me incredibly sad to hear since I really like the character, I can understand her decision to walk away from so much toxicity. Besides, I never thought that I would ever see an Episode VII, let alone be writing a review for Episode IX so who knows? All ways in motion is the future.

Now, lets move from one Skywalker to another, or rather, a Solo. I believed that Kylo Ren was irredeemable, after murdering his father and clearly trying to kill his uncle. I believed that the Skywalker legacy would be one of failure, and it was another problem that I had with the Sequel Trilogy as a whole, which flew in the face of both in the belief in redemption as well as Skywalker legacy of Legends. Thankfully, I can say that I was completely mistaken; while Kylo does have to pay with his life, he ultimately redeems both himself and his family in a very beautiful way. It starts after he and Rey engage in yet another battle, only for her to impale him with her lightsaber; Rey quickly uses the Force to heal and save Kylo, who is left stunned at both his brush with death and his salvation coming from someone he has been trying to kill for months. Kylo then has an internal discussion with a mental projection of Han where they repeat the dialogue leading up to Han’s death only this time, Ben does reject the darkness and discards his Sith saber. After rushing to aid Rey in her confrontation with the Emperor (which involves Ben completely destroying the Knights of Ren), Ben is unable to prevent Rey from dying while defeating Sidious, but after tapping into the Force, he is able to bring Rey back long enough for them to share a kiss before becoming one with the Force himself. 

Ben’s sacrifice is one of the best moments of the film and one of the extremely few ways it ties into the wider saga. Anakin fell to the dark side because he was afraid of losing Padme, which ultimately he did because of his anger and lust for power. His grandson, despite making many of the same mistakes as him, is able to do what Anakin wanted most in the entire galaxy: to save the one’s he loves. It does come at a price, namely that to bring someone back, someone else has to give up their own life-force, but it still brings us full circle in a very nice way that parallels Anakin’s journey. It also helps that in doing so, he helps redeem the Skywalker name by passing the torch so to speak and helping undo some of the damage he caused by aiding the Sith and the First Order. Ben’s redemption is one of the strongest moments of Episode IX, and it makes me a little sad that we wont get to see more of him in the future.

  So, now that we’ve gotten most of the important stuff covered, lets move on to some nitpicks before we look at the film as a whole as well as the Sequel Trilogy. The biggest wasted potential in this film to me was the Knights of Ren and, by extension, Luke’s Jedi Order. Ever since Episode VII, we’ve had only the most tantalizing hints about this dark side order, and when they finally appear on the big screen, it’s to stand around looking intimidating before getting slaughtered by Ben on his way to join Rey in confronting Palpatine. We no exactly zero about them, what their philosophy is, how they differ from Sith or why they decided to join Ben when he fell and turned against his uncle; maybe those that joined him were so appalled by Luke’s attempted murder that they cast off the identity of Jedi completely. The point is we don’t know anything about them, nor do we ever learn anything about Luke’s Order and how it differed from the old Jedi Order; from what I can gather it seems that Luke recreated the old Order nearly exactly rather than improving on it like he did in Legends, and I can’t exactly blame some people from going nuts after joining a religious extremist group.

 Just like with Phasma and Snoke, the Knights of Ren and Luke’s Jedi are treated as an afterthought, an interesting idea that other media can talk about, but the movies cant be bothered with, and that is not only frustrating, but poor writing as well; and I know that all of these have a parallels with stuff from the Original Trilogy and the Prequels as well, but that just leads me to the jagged bedrock of my complaint: not learning from past mistakes, and just shrugging shoulders and saying “good enough, let someone else fill in the details.” The same also holds true for the final battle of the film; compared to the space battles of Episode III and VI, the one here is again, treated as almost an afterthought – something that needs to be there, but only serves as a backdrop to what’s going on with Palpatine. This battle includes fleets, ships and troops in almost never before seen numbers, and yet we only get a few snippets of action and shots here and there; when the reinforcements arrive, they fill out the screen, but none of them do anything special, or memorable or impressive. They go through all that trouble of having such an immense fleet, only for 95-99% of the action take place off screen. As with Palpatine’s defeat, the massive fleet had great build-up and potential, but fizzled out rather than concluding with a bang. 

Speaking of the final battle, lets talk about the other half of that coin and its own lackluster finish. We’ve already gone over how Palpatine is defeated, but what I and so many other fans lamented was that no Force ghosts appeared, only spoke to Rey, and that the one appearance that would have really worked and helped give the film that sense of finality that it’s been claiming to represent, would have been an appearance by Anakin Skywalker. Seeing Anakin again after a decade-and-a-half since Episode III would have been incredible, given hardcore fans something special, and made sense within the story. We do hear him speak directly to Rey, but I have to wonder if either J.J. didn’t want to do it so as to keep the focus on Rey and her purpose/identity as All-the-Jedi-In-One, or maybe Hayden decided he didn’t want do it (and I cant say I blame him, after how toxic members of this Fandom treated him), but having three actors and characters from each of the three eras would have been a treat for everyone, and it’s yet another misstep that the film made.

So, overall, how do I feel about Star Wars: Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker? While I can appreciate everything that we got and how much it seems like they really wanted to repair the damage The Last Jedi did to the fanbase, I cant help but wonder at what could have been: what if the trilogy had been planned out from the start, or at least handled by one unifying creative director? Either way, it seems like what really hurt this trilogy was lack of direction and having to play catch-up when you only have half the pieces of the puzzle. In turns of the grand culmination of the Skywalker Saga…it’s not; it’s a satisfying conclusion to its own trilogy of stories, but in terms of being the grand culmination of forty years worth of stories, it just isn’t. If it was, it would have been treated that way and actually tied more of the three trilogies together instead of relying on nostalgia to round out the story the same way it began with Episode VII. I know this sounds like I didn’t like the movie, but I did: when I left the theater I was pleased with what I had just seen, and excited to see where the future was going to take these characters (well, mostly Rey, but that’s because Poe is barely involved in the story and poor Finn gets almost nothing to do – I heard how his entire character has been distilled into “the guy who shouts ‘whoo!’”, which is entirely apt and correct and yet another major misstep with this series since we finally have a character that was a former stormtooper, and they do nothing with him). While there are currently no plans for future films with these characters, there was a time when we all thought we would never, ever ever, ever see an Episode VII either, so I hold out hope that someday, these characters will return to pass the torch off to the next generation someday. 

Final Score: 7.5/10

*Bonus*

My Star Wars 11 Films Rankings

Star Wars: Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Star Wars: Episode IV: A New Hope

Star Wars: Episode VII: The Force Awakens

Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

Star Wars: Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker

Star Wars: Rogue One

Star Wars: Solo

Star Wars: Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

Star Wars: Episode VIII: The Last Jedi

Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones

Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace