#and now it's just period underwear/cloth pads and sometimes a disposable pad and/or tampon)

[aprillikesthings]

if you have period underwear

and/or re-usable fabric pads, a lot of people will tell you rinse them the moment you take them off, or soak them before washing. I have never managed to do this consistently??

(Also the times I rinsed them out I was like...okay but now I have soaking wet, still not-clean period undies. Now what.)

But if you just toss them (dried blood and all) into your normal cold-water wash they don't always get clean enough plus, I dunno, it feels Icky to me. (YMMV, if you're using them only for backup to tampons/cups it's not a big deal; but when I've worn just period undies on a heavier day....oof.)

But what DOES work for me:

First, I just wash them in a normal (low-water) cold water wash by themselves.

Then, when that cycle is over, I add the rest of my cold water load and run it normally. So the pads/undies get washed twice: once by themselves, and once with a normal load of clothes.

(And I always air-dry them.)

Obviously this isn't a great option if you pay for every load you wash--I have laundry hook-ups and own my washer.

ALSO I have ADHD if I'm not sitting in the living room where I can hear the washing machine sing its little "I'm done!" song, I set a timer to remind me to flip the laundry otherwise I would NEVER REMEMBER

[run2yamama]

R2YM - FIRST PERIOD ADVICE, TIPS & RESOURCES (PART 1)

Your first period can be scary and worrying , even traumatising if you begin at a much earlier age (some people start their periods early as age 8). but around 12 is the most common age. I know some of my friends really struggled WITH the support and guidance of their mum, so going through it without your mum is not easy by any means. Periods can last up to 5 days usually however there is a huge variation on this and this isn’t the rule at all. A period can be shorter than 5 days as well as more, everyone is different and you will get to know yours. When you first start you period, it isn’t just automatically regulated. You may not have one for a long time after or it could be quite random after your first one. This is ok and normal! It can take 2-3 years to regulate. They should then occur every 4-5 weeks, again not a rule and some get them less than this or more. I’m going to try my best to provide you with as much advice that I can from the beginning to end. This will include actual practical advice, because lord knows I really needed this; as well as emotional guidance. I’m here to tell you that it will be okay, you are going to be just fine and you absolutely got this. I’m sorry if you feel alone in this and I hope this can at the very least give you some guidance and reassurance. HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE GETTING YOUR FIRST PERIOD & ARE THERE ANY SIGNS?

Each and every body has it’s own schedule & there are many factors that can contribute to your body being ready/not ready to have it’s first period. These factors be diet, weight, stress and hereditary. I guess I would expect a mum to prepare her child in the way she knows best, ideally a combination of facts and reassurance. I guess this is what I want to emulate for you.

Knowing some signs you could potentially look out for as well as feeling prepared can make a huge difference for when you see that you have started your period.

Around 2 years after you begin to develop breasts, you could expect your first period. This is NOT by any means the rule, it’s just an indication and of course is not bang on the 2 year mark.

You may start to feel/see discharge in your underwear, it can be a mucus like fluid sometimes and can sometimes look dark brown or white (not always). This can also be an indicator and the discharge could start 6 months to 1 year before you get your first period. Once again though this is NOT a rule and you could get your period the day after, week after etc OR you might not go through this stage at all (this is the case for many, including myself).

Seeking medical advice is the best option IF you get to the 15/16 age mark and have still not started your period. It isn’t unheard of by any means for people to begin their periods closer to the 17/18 age mark however I would still advise getting yourself checked over.

DECIDING WHAT METHOD IS BEST FOR YOURSELF & STAYING PREPARED(SANITARY PADS/TOWELS, TAMPONS & MENSTRUAL CUPS)

This part is completely up to you! Sanitary towels are easier and relatively fuss free, especially for your first time because it doesn’t require much effort in terms of getting one on. For your first time you might not be comfortable with anything more invasive or ‘hands on’ in adjusting. You could opt for something organic as some tend to find that mainstream pads/tampons make their cramps/period flow worse due to chemicals being absorbed from them. It’s worth having a look around for something affordable and stocking up if that is something you’re thinking about. Regardless of the product you decide on you need to absolutely ALWAYS follow the rule of washing your hands before and after changing your pad/tampon/menstrual cup. I can’t stress this enough, I hope it doesn’t come across as patronising but you definitely don’t want any bacteria that lives on your skin/that you come in contact to entering your body via your vagina. Though this might be obvious to some, it won’t be to others especially if they haven’t had a nurturing mother-figure and there is no shame in that.

PROS OF SANITARY PADS/TOWELS – Easy to use -Fewer precautions to follow -Allows for natural vaginal cleaning -They can be worn overnight without worry (within reason) -Can be worn for just a light flow or spotting -You can wear one before your period is due to start so that you can avoid leaking/an accident -You can monitor your flow at regular intervals through the day, especially if you are new to periods. It’s definitely good to get to know and understand your flow/cycle -They are found in more stores globally than other products -There isn’t a specific risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome or TSS (will discuss below) like there is with tampons -If changed regularly and the right pad is used then you should be safe from leaks on the whole. Pads will have the ability to absorb different amounts of liquid so this is why also getting to know your flow is helpful. -You can get pads that are made from various materials, these can be re-used and has less of an environmental impact CONS OF SANITARY PADS/TOWELS -Unless you’re getting a pad that has the ‘diaper’ like feel to it, a regular/even thick pad is less likely to hold a really heavy/bad flow without you changing it often throughout the day –Also in relation to the above point, they can be uncomfortable/awkward with certain types of clothing (this is more for if you’re wearing a thicker pad) -There is the risk of it coming unstuck/gathering up in your underwear causing leaks -They do have a high environmental impact (disposable ones, not cotton) -More likely to experience odour, especially on a hot day, if working out or on a heavy flow and you’re not using the correct type of pad that day etc PROS OF TAMPONS –They are discreet due to them being inserted internally –They can prevent odour during use also due to being internal -More ideal for wearing during sports and activities like swimming -Can hold more liquid in one go than a pad can -Some say they can’t feel it at all if inserted correctly -You get a decent amount of them in a box (usually) CONS OF TAMPONS -Important precautions to follow as the consequences can be life threatening -Some people don’t find them easy to use, especially the first time -Tend to cost more than other menstrual products -Some people find that they still have to wear a pad if they have a tampon in, this can be down to flow, personal preference OR the wrong the tampon has the wrong type of absorbency -You can’t monitor your flow with as much ease if that’s something you would like to do/need to do -Said to make cramps/flow worse due to it being inserted internally & releasing the chemicals found in mainstream products directly -Unlike pads you can’t/shouldn’t really – insert a tampon as a preemptive option before you’re due on, wear one if you’re just having a really light flow/spotting or sleep with it in over night (definitely not this last one, some say all night is ok but for me personally it’s a no!) –Risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome (TSS) if you do not use tampons with the correct precautions (will outline below) -You do need to change them more often than you would with pads as the precautions state. Tampons used to be ideal because you could just ‘leave them in and forget about it’ but we are now more educated on Toxic Shock Syndrome and that just isn’t advisable or safe –They aren’t available globally or easy to find globally -Choosing tampons with the correct absorbency is important, going for ‘super-absorbant’ in the hopes of having to change it less frequently isn’t advisable either and this is where cases of TSS can occur PROS OF MENSTRUAL CUPS These are small, flexible and rubber/silicone cups. It doesn’t absorb your flow, it instead catches it. You have to fold it tightly to insert it (much like a tampon). You may need to rotate it into the correct position but it should essentially spring open once inserted and rest against the walls of your vagina in order to catch the blood. To take it out you just need to pinch it at the base which you will be able to feel, this will release the seal in order for you to remove it. -Though you can get disposable ones, most people opt for a reusable one. This means that it is very eco-friendly and in the long run significantly cheaper. I’m not saying you should keep it for years and years (some articles say you can if you are on top of keeping it clean) but you can get a lot of use out of a menstrual cup. -You can leave it in for longer (for 6+ hours – within reason and if you really need to) and is safer overnight because of this -Once you are confident at inserting it correctly you shouldn’t need a back up pad due to the seal the cup creates against the vagina wall -Good for heavy flows/more reassuring as menstrual cups tend to hold 1 ounce of liquid at least -Menstrual blood does get an odour when exposed to air so this helps to lessen that significantly due to the blood being contained -Less chance of Toxic Shock Syndrome than a tampon as you aren’t having to constantly change it and risk the spread of bacteria internally -May ease the worry/anxiety that some people get due to tampons and TSS CONS OF MENSTRUAL CUPS –It can cause irritation internally/externally, you need to be sure you aren’t sensitive to the materials these cups are made of. Some people are sensitive and may experience irritation regardless of what they use however irritation is more likely to occur with a cup than it is a pad or tampon –You NEED to be on top of keeping it clean and sterile so this requires more effort –It probably isn’t going to be easy to find the right fit and size, especially if you’re new to this. Age, flow and for some of my older readers – if you’ve had a child – can also be a factor in what will fit comfortably. If you have a tilted or low cervix (you will know, it makes trying to insert something internally slightly more difficult until you understand your body) this could mean a bit of trial and error with the cup –Some people don’t struggle with getting it in, it’s the removal that they find messy. Sitting and squatting and using your pelvic floor muscles to push and assist you is the way to get it out. You need to pinch the base to break the seal, and tilt it back or you will spill blood –Not as easy to deal with in public places, you need to wash it out and you’re not going to do that in a public sink really. Some take bottles of water with them and then wipe it down, I personally don’t enjoy the thought of doing that at all –Again if you’re new to periods, you might not want to end up in a messy situation in a public bathroom if you do try to remove it. Really get comfortable with it –Some worry that the cup will interfere with their IUD (for my older readers – a contraception device that is internal) this isn’t a fact at all, but does worry some people

INFORMATION ON TOXIC SHOCK SYNDROME (TSS) This section isn’t to scare anyone! It’s real life though. I feel that when you don’t have a mum you do miss out on HUGE chunks of information and parts of conversations that are being had around you. Even if you understand periods relatively well, this area often goes overlooked and it is so so important. 

This condition is rare BUT it is 100% a life-threatening condition. It can affect men and children but it is associated with tampon users, it is much easier to spread bacteria internally because of obvious reasons. TSS can get bad very very quickly and therefore it can be fatal if not treated within time. People who are able to catch it in time and are treated do usually make a full recovery. It is important to know that TSS is not spread from person to person and you DON’T develop an immunity to it. If you get it once, you can still get it again. The bacteria that can cause TSS are Staphylococcus or Streptococcus, they actually do live on our skin and in our mouth and nose HOWEVER once they enter our body internally there is an issue. They begin to release toxins that damage tissue and essentially stop organs working. CAUSES THAT ARE RELATED TO TAMPONS –Leaving tampons in longer than the recommended time in general –Using ‘super-absorbent’ tampons, encouraging you to leave them in longer but these are widely associated with TSS –Some are not thorough enough when washing their hands in between having to change their tampon. If you are making direct contact with your vagina several times a day WITHOUT precaution then this is an issue –Inserting more than 1 tampon is not the correct thing to do at all. Knowingly doing this when you are having a heavy flow for example is not advisable. –Forgetting you have a tampon in and inserting a new one on top of it. This is a familiar story that we have heard about many times over the years. A young girl is admitted into hospital on the brink of death due to TSS and the doctor finds 2 or 3 old tampons inserted that she has forgotten about HOW TO PREVENT TSS –Only use tampons that have the correct absorbency for your flow, you don’t need to always go for the most aggressively absorbent tampon –Alternate between pads and tampons whilst on your period. Tampons do have their pros but using them for your whole cycle isn’t always necessary –Wash your hands thoroughly before and after inserting a tampon, like really scrub your hands down as best as you can. If you could see what was on your hands with the blind eye you would be horrified – even more so if you could see what you may spread to your vagina! –Change your tampon often, don’t get lazy with it due to them being discreet and convenient –Never insert more than one tampon at the same time –If you want to wear one overnight, make sure it’s a fresh one right before you go to bed. As soon as you wake up in the morning you need to change it as a priority –Do not forget to remove your tampon at the end of your period –If you have had TSS before it is a good idea to avoid tampons SYMPTOMS OF TSS – THESE START SUDDENLY AND GET WORSE RAPIDLY – IF AT THIS POINT YOU ARE WEARING A TAMPON YOU NEED TO REMOVE IT & INFORM A DOCTOR -A high temperature (fever) of 39C/102.2F or above –Flu like symptoms (headache, chills and muscle aches) –Feeling sick or actually being sick –A widespread rash that looks like sun-burn –Diarrhoea –Whites of the eyes, tip of the tongue and tongue turning a bright red –Dizziness and fainting –Confusion and drowsiness –Difficulties breathing properly TREATMENT FOR TSS – WITH TREATMENT MOST PEOPLE RECOVERY FULLY WITHIN DAYS AND LEAVE THE HOSPITAL IN WEEKS –You will need to be admitted into hospital, most people do end up in ICU –You may receive purified antibodies (via blood donations) to fight the infection –Oxygen to assist breathing –Fluids for dehydration and prevention of organ damage –Medication to control blood pressure –Dialysis if your kidneys fail –In some very serious cases, surgery is required to remove areas of dead tissue. In even more severe cases the area will require amputation Part 2 will include some tips and advice, not just from me but from women of different ages and background. Perspective is everything. The more you know the more prepared you can feel without your mum at this point in your life. It’s absolutely okay to need help in this area and there is no shame in saying nobody was there to teach you.

[hellospunkiebrewster]

Hello! I recently started following your blog and it's amazing! From what i've seen you know a lot of stuff so i thought i'd ask you a question that's been on my mind for some time - How did women deal with their periods in regency era? I'm sorry but i was wondering what D&D MC would do in that time of the month, with all those dresses and stuff.

Awesome question Nonnie! It is true that yes, women didn’t have the same sort of luxuries we do now when dealing with their periods but you might be surprised that a lot of the concepts were quite similar. My full answer will be behind the cut here. Let’s talk periods!

Firstly though, I think it is important to talk about what exactly women were sporting under their skirts during the time. In a previous post I mentioned that many ladies of the time did not wear anything under their skirts. Drawers were considered unladylike and risqué as they resembled pants and a lady should never be caught in anything resembling pants, however, they were just beginning to catch on. Even many men did not wear them in the early 1800s, instead using their overlong shirts as their primary undergarment as it was thought that drawers spoiled the line of your trousers. Drawers made their appearance in 1806, but it took time for them to gain popularity for both men and women. The lack of anything under a lady’s skirts was the subject of many a cartoonist of the era.

Thomas Rowlandson’s Exhibition Stare Case, 1800.

The first women’s undergarments, pantalettes, were little more than two tubes of fabric with a tie to secure them around the woman’s waist. They may include some decorative lace at the hems, Incase they were seen by the likes of Mr. Sinclaire. This allowed for the lady to attend to her business without having to remove any layers of her clothing. It also probably provided for quite the show when a woman might be on stage dancing the can-can.

Drawing of women’s pantalettes.

So now that we know what was covering, or not covering, a lady’s business in that era we can talk about what ladies did during their monthlies. There were about three to four options, depending on your flow and means.

The first and most convenient of the options was probably what amounts to as a homemade tampon. This didn’t require you to remove anything in order to relieve yourself. A smooth stick, like a dowel, about the length of one’s little finger would be wrapped with absorbent linen cloths and sewn. Sometimes herbs or other home remedies would be included in this bundle, in an attempt to help assuage some of the symptoms that came along with one’s monthly. A long string would be attached and sewn in as well, and a lady would use the string not only for extraction but for tying it around her leg as to not leave the bloody little bundle of shame behind if she sneezed or coughed in public. These were disposable. Other tampons might be as simple as a small drawstring bag with a sponge or wadded up fabric inside. The small baggie’s contents could be disposed of and replaced and the bag reused. These would be homemade and our dear friend Briar has probably been busy when we’re out, stitching up some tampons for us.

Drawing of these “privy place suppositories” as they were called.

The second option, probably often used as a backup for ladies with heavier flows, would be to secure a wadded up napkin, made of fabric, between her legs with the use of a belt just above her hips like a loincloth under her skirt, petticoats, and chemise. This is where the term on the rag comes from. This fabric was essentially what amounted to a long strip of fabric, similar in many ways to a cravat (the tie that men would wrap around their neck and tie in fancy knots as part of their full dress) folded over itself many times, although definitely not as heavily starched and painstakingly ironed as Beau Brummell’s cravats. This basically amounted to a pad, only secured around the waist since underwear, in the modern sense, was not around to hold it in place. These, unlike their tampon counterparts, were not disposable and would be kept in a covered bucket of water in a cool, private place until the lady’s monthly was over and they could be all boiled and laundered together.

Drawing of a menstrual belt, a lot more modern than what our MC would use as this particular one was from the 1870s.

The next option was reserved for ladies lucky enough to have light flows. They would simply free bleed and wear perhaps a layer of heavier petticoats under their dresses to keep their condition a secret. This method began to fall out of practice as it was discovered, towards the late 1800s to be unsanitary to just leave blood everywhere in your clothing.

Lastly, ladies of a particular economic standing (women of noble birth, wives in the ton, and those simply with rich husbands or fathers) would quite possibly spend the days in bed, feigning a headache or other type of malady, instead of troubling themselves too much with all of that suppository, menstrual belt, free bleeding nonsense unless they really had a ball or dinner party to attend that was quite crucial and particularly enticing.

I think I’m pretty safe in assuming that you realize Midol did not exist back then. The Georgian/Regency Era is also a bit removed from the religious shame of the Puritans and Medieval Times. Before this time, pain relief was not offered and extremely frowned upon as it was believed that each cramp was a reminder of Eve’s original sin. Queen Victoria, who took the throne in 1837, was actually the first woman to publicly admit to using pain relief during labor as it was also thought of as cleansing and important to the whole process of childbirth. However, in this era, that sort of religious shame was falling out of practice and women would use herbs, tinctures, and teas to help with not only pain but also shortening their time of the month.

Women would drink ginger teas, peppermint teas, chamomile tea, and infusions of yarrow root to help with cramping. They may also use other herbs or tinctures applied to the area or taken to help as well. Motherwort, used to quicken contractions for birth, may be used to ease menstrual pain. Licorice or black cohosh depending on the season we’re used. Victorian times brought about patented medicines and we began to see actual reliable pain relief for women during their periods.

Humphries Homeopathic No. 31, a Victorian Era patented medicine for menstrual relief.

I hope this answers your question Nonnie! This was a fun one, although I think I’m getting sympathy cramps just writing and thinking about it.

[cafenzie]

oh look, me again regarding things in fanfic that bug me --

/ This will be concerning menstruation and menstrual cycles/periods as it relates in general and it’s misconceptions found in descriptions of writing.

So.......sometimes I feel like the people who write fanfiction and scenes or areas regarding periods...don’t have periods??? Given that I know the number of female to male writers can be equal, I also know a ton more girls that happen to write and so it’s really confusing how misleading some may periods sound in fanfic when....they would, theoretically, have experience of periods themselves. 

And it’s not the weird un-experienced “sex scene - esque” thing that I see a lot of in fanfiction either, because it’s a natural and obvious thing, my friend. Periods are a thing and so if you don’t like the talk about it you can turn back now but honestly this shouldn’t be “disgusting” in any way what I’m about to unleash on you because it’s just natural so get over it, really. ( unless you have a fear of blood, that’s different ).

What I’m talking about is writers who dramatize or don’t realistically portray periods and menstrual cycles. Whether it’s the “bright red blood” or, you know, like blood everywhere ( like....on the wall kind of everywhere because then it sound like more like a homicide case instead ) or just the general points people can miss so I’ll just start in no particular order of how to properly go about writing about periods and people on their periods :

01. Please, for the love of the stars, don’t always go describe the blood as bright red. I see this so many times that I wonder if some of these people really don’t have periods or understand how they work ?? Let’s make this easy: menstrual blood comes in all variety of colors from that light crimson ( especially during a lighter cycle ) all the way to a dark brown that, yeah, sounds like it’s from the wrong place, but it’s not.  Actually, the darker your blood is, the more likely it’s “leftover” as I call it, meaning it’s the blood left over from last month’s lining and never got disposed of out of your lady bits and because it’s been so long, the color darkens and only gets disposed of when your new cycle starts. Usually, I start with darker blood because of that exact reason -- it’s one of the first things to come out along with all that fresh blood that, yes, may look a little brighter.  But the rest of the point is: not everyone has bright red blood on their menstrual cycle. Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever talked to anyone who did, besides in small, sparse amounts..! 

02. Do NOT cover up shitty actions with PMS reasoning. Do not validate someone shitting all over a person just because “they are on their period”. I hear this one so often, of how women are portrayed as literal devils while on their periods because of “PMS”. Yeah, okay, I get pretty annoyed more so when I’m on my period, but that’s due to three main reasons: (1) Hormones are the secret behind “PMS” as everyone dubs it. Estrogen and Progesterone levels in your body may heighten or serious decrease, causing imbalance, which affects your Serotonin, which is a neurotransmitter responsible for your mood balance, pain perception, and the sleep-wake cycle your body is used to. (2) I put in a trusty tampon but came back realizing my cycle is too heavy and I bled through. Maybe I was out and about. Maybe I was wearing nice underwear. Maybe I put the tampon in wrong or I should have brought a pad to put with it. Whatever the case is, every woman deals with her period a different way, personality-wise included. The myth about grumpy women who get super cheery is just waay too cliche for one thing, and it’s just ea fact that some women perceive their periods in different ways: I know girls that perk up during their cycle and we hang out and laugh and shit. I know women that may bite you if you try and grab her pizza slice, but who wouldn’t normally?? Fact is that variety is a thing with so called “PMS” and while it’s a handy term, it’s also become very desensitized to just mean that cliche stereotype of a she-devil or dragon lady who’s simultaneously bleeding out.

I’ll add on another common stereotypical misconception ( or, a least, how it’s treated to seem like ) with eating habits of a girl fighting through her cycle. Yeah, we get hungry. We eat, probably a lot more than normal, and yeah we probably eat a lot more greasy or starchy food than normal. And yeah...we fucking eat chocolate man, because it’s delicious and we deserve it. However, we do this for a reason and -- like everything else there -- it varies between each person. When we are on our periods, we are continuously losing blood ( on average 40 milliliters a day for approximately 5 days give or take ). Generally, we try and make up for everything lost during that time by drinking lots of water, but also eating more -- also as a side-effect of our Serotonin as well as the initial phase before bleeding in which our body is thinning we may have a child ( in which case it makes us think we should be eating for two ). So yeah, food is good. On another note, caffeine can actually heighten your irritability and pain during a menstrual cycle and it’s usually advised to avoid it for that time, unless you’re like me and can’t live without that first sip of morning coffee so just be wary.

03. Believe or not, those who don’t have periods, it smells. Vaginas have an odor and let me tell you that odor just come to life with that discharge. Again, everyone differs, but smells that can come from below deck are caused by bacteria mostly and the fact that you’ve been retaining moisture down there all this time by wearing underwear ( on a side note, it’s actually very good to go without the knickers every so often, even just to bed! Air that sucker out, she needs it ). Take into mind you’re losing blood and mucus and tissue that’s literally shedding from your uterus. Vaginas also can smell on a regular basis because that’s how the cookie crumbles, folks. Same thing, minus the blood and gore.  It’s only different or “bad” if it’s because of an infection like yeast or your pH levels are off ( like using douches / body washes up in there. Trust me -- DON’T ). Otherwise, it’s normal!

04. Cramping and pain is normal, yes, but please remember the other sides of your cycle from fevers, headaches ( the worst ), migraines, heartburn, aching muscles, dizziness, vomiting / nausea, and the list goes on ! Period pain is not just defined by those cramps that we feel all the way from right above our uterus all the up into our belly because there is so much more. Not only that, but people experience cramping differently -- some don’t even notice it at all!  Take into mind that lots of people ( like me ) commonly take medications like Midol or Pamprin to suppress or relieve these symptoms along with others. Some take it religiously as soon as they see the blood coming, but there’s also light-takers who only take a dosage when the feel it.  Me, personally -- I’ll use a hot pad if it feels really bad and drink lots of cranberry juice to make sure I’m still peeing well and I may find that laying in that strange position that took me 30 minutes to find is also helpful. Point is, you can surely relieve that pain with medication and most smart girls do if they know they need it, so it really just doesn't make much sense to constantly write about your girl writhing on the floor in pain every month now does it?

05. Okay, now we’re really gonna get personal so fair warning of possible/slight NSFW below. ....For my girls out there who get really heated during their period, I feel you. Honestly, I think this is one of my personal main indicators of my oncoming cycle since I’ll notice that “ hey, I’ve been fantasizing about Bucky Barnes way more than I normally do ”. Yeah, given I love Bucky Barnes, I think of myself somewhat humble for not thinking about what else that metal arm could be put to good use for every single night, okay?  I guess this segment will also just be informative for those of you unfamiliar with sex during your period or masturbation during a cycle, so be prepared if you’re wondering. For this, my main concern with fanfic writers is that they write how blood get everywhere, and I mean like on the ceiling kind of everywhere or like soaks through to the mattress and I’ll sit here so confused. So let Abby here inform you all about the basic 101 of the menstrual nsfw news. 

First thing’s first is that it really does not get everywhere. I’ll be brutally honest in saying that when I do the deed, the aftermath and cleanup is not as bad as you think. Maybe just a quick rinse off or brush off, quick dab of a cool cloth with water on it -- you’re good. ( obviously do take care of your toys though, please: I just mean this in general ). And if you really are worried about the mess you might make, like I was the very first time, lay out a towel !! ( other option is the shower, just don’t slip friends ).  Second thing: will it hurt? In my experience, it shouldn’t?? I hope it doesn’t and if you do feel pain, just stop. For me, personally, it tends to relieve a lot of my pain while, ultimately, satisfying my crave so I’m happy.  Lastly, the oral implied in a lot of fanfic can be...excessive? And while this isn’t bad, it can also leave about a big chunk of the previous information and description  from the color, smell, texture, even taste! ( for some reason there’s the popular cliche of the person raising their head after giving them head and they just see like the blood dripping down their chin and I’m like ??? not very realistic guys tbh ). Since we’ve covered the first two already we’ll jump into texture and taste: remember that the discharge during a cycle isn’t just blood. It’s a mixture of loose blood, bits of tissue from the lining that was shed, and your cervical mucus ( which mostly determines the texture as a whole ). Cervical mucus can change and differ but is mostly known for these main descriptions: tacky/sticky, creamy, milky, watery, etc. It’s mostly a matter of how dense it is whether it’s like a thick cream, a lotion, or water. Take into mind how the person giving oral will perceive this along with taste! Those little balls of flesh from your uterus lining the wall? Yeah, they’ll get some of that, and it will look black and that may be freaky but it’s honest. Despite the common mistake that period discharge tastes like the blood that comes from your arm or mouth, it does not. It will not have a super metallic-y taste and, overall, may not be pleasant ( also given how old it could be ). That doesn’t mean it can’t be good, to a degree, but don’t expect Dracula to be lusting after you. 

I think that’s all I can currently think of, please add on if you can any more side-notes or comments, questions, etc. For you fanfic writers, please TAKE NOTE OF THIS. And to my girls out there, you keep rocking it, gorgeous. 

[mrsbabie]

I Said Goodbye To Disposable Period Products

I wanna talk about something most females can relate to—struggles of using period products. We all know this… Aside from cramps & bloating, we still have to deal with blood-stained undies (& sometimes pants/skirt), rashes & that awkward noise your pad makes when you peel it off of your underwear! Also, there is this one thing that most pad users never really realized. Commercial disposable pads have chemicals in the absorbent layer that cause serious harm to our body. You can Google it for your own information, or just take my word for it.

I’ll be sharing some eewie details here that I’ve never even discussed with my husband. Don’t scream “yuck, TMI!”, okay? Pull up your big girl skirt for now. I promise this post is very informative. You might even thank me later. Anyway, for years, I’ve hated having my period. First, I got rashes from disposable pads. I never entertained the idea of using tampons, because it intimidated me. I had to deal with rashes almost every month, especially during hot days. Imagine having rashes & still needed to wear a pad that rubbed on your painful rashes. Second, I hate changing my pad in public bathrooms (like office bathrooms). IDK, I just hate (indirectly) telling everyone I’m bleeding. Lastly, I had serious cramping almost every month! I even had to take meds to stop the pain.

Fast forward to motherhood, I discovered that there’s a whole new world (*cue Alladin, Princess Jasmine & flying carpet) of alternative products that we can use, practically for anything. When I began our cloth diapering journey, I found out that there are reusable cloth products for women. Apparently, this is a hipster thing, literally, since in the 70’s, women made cloth pads with cute prints. Our lolas known these pads as “pasador”. Materials that were used then were mostly cotton fabrics, with no layer of barrier to avoid staining the underwear. Years later, the old cloth pads were updated to use modern but still organic cloth materials to make them more absorbent & have a leak-resistant backing.

Since I was already sewing cloth diapers back in 2014, I decided to make my own reusable cloth pads. I made a few pieces for myself & tested them out. IT WAS LIFE-CHANGING.

I never had rashes again & never felt sweaty down there. It was very comfortable. I can’t remember the last time I bought a disposable pad. It’s a great way to save money for more important things, like FOOD & Korean skincare products. And the best part about my switch was my cramps got better. I think my menstrual cycle even regulated. I’m a stay-at-home mom, so I can easily change when I have to. I just rinse out the blood under running water & hang them on the clothes line to dry until laundry day. (EDIT: If you're often out, you can simply fold them & keep them in a waterproof bag. Just rinse them when you get home.) Come laundry day, I put all pads in a mesh wash bag & throw them in the washing machine, together with other undergarments. Just regular wash, without bleach and fabric conditioner. IMPORTANT: Don’t use bleach & fab con because they can irritate your delicate skin & affect the pads’ ability to absorb.

A year later, I also learned about menstrual cups through the Facebook mom groups I’m in. I purchased a MeLuna Size 1 with stem through a Facebook shop. Honestly, it was very intimidating at first. It’s very tricky to use, and it may hurt if you insert it incorrectly. But once you get the hang of inserting & removing, you’ll enjoy your period more. I know I have. Pros:

Menstrual cups + cloth pad is a bullet-proof solution for heavy flow & overnight use.

You don’t feel anything. You may even forget you’re having your period. Srsly.

You can swim, pee, ride a bike or do yoga while wearing it.

You can wear it up to 12 hours.

Absolutely no period odor!

But for most Filipino women, we’re still intimidated by anything that requires us to insert anything in our lady parts, this is why pads are more popular than tampons.

If you are curious about choosing organic cloth pads & would like to try them out, there are some up for sale at the PooppeeTrap store. Each pad is 9-inches long (same as regular disposable pads). These are not only super absorbent, but also very cute! The top layer is a wicking jersey that soaks up liquid fast, stain-resistant & very smooth. Visit the store at pooppeetrap.weebly.com/store

If you have questions about using cloth pads & menstrual cups in general, leave a comment below. ;)

[floraexplorer]

Ten Eco-Friendly Products for the Traveller in Your Life

“Single-use plastics are the devil!”

I stood in the pharmacy aisle and staring at the dental floss picks in disbelief. Twenty different brands, all with plastic handles wrapped in cellophane, all supposed to be used once then thrown out.

I’d just come from a visit to the dental hygienist who’d told me to I needed to floss. She’d even recommended these picks because they’re easier to use than regular floss – but I couldn’t bear the idea of wilfully buying something so environmentally wasteful.

Five minutes of deliberation later, I eventually had to turn around and walk out of the store, my vow to improve my dental hygiene melting away.

It got me thinking about the choices I make when it comes to eco-friendly products. A lot of factors in my regular life at home are chosen on the basis of their environmental impact: I shop in charity shops and thrift stores for clothes; I recycle plastics and organic waste — and clearly I’m growing increasingly conscious of how much plastic I buy.

But how do I manage to be eco-friendly when I travel? 

Travelling is, in essence, an environmental problem – from a plane ride’s damaging carbon emissions to the excessive amount of waste generated by millions of tourists in countries ill-equipped to dispose of it.

Luckily, there are countries combatting the tourism crisis with bans on single-use plastic and aims to become entirely climate-neutral – but we still have a responsibility as individuals.

When travelling, we can be more eco-conscious by turning off the lights, picking up our rubbish, using public transport, and being conscious of the amount of water we use. In short, all the things we (hopefully!) already do at home. We can eat locally, travel more slowly, and buy from independent retailers.

But the biggest personal change we can make is to simply stop using so much. If single-use items grow less popular, eventually we’ll see a marked difference in our efforts to combat waste.

Over the years I’ve amassed a selection of products which make my travels a bit more eco-friendly. I know from personal experience that they’re all affordable, durable and worth the money you’ll spend – and each of them helps the environment in their own way.

Read more: Ethical mistakes I’ve made while travelling

Reusable bag

When I was younger, I used to watch my mum carrying multiple bags everywhere she went. I used to joke and call her ‘a bag lady’ – but now I remember that her newspapers, groceries and extra layers were always in tote bags, never plastic.

A brand she particularly loved was Onya. In an effort to challenge our disposable culture, Onya use yarn made from recycled plastic bottles to make reusable bags. Mum gave me a blue Onya bag over a decade ago, and despite it getting increasingly stained and worn out, that same bag is still going strong fifteen years later.

The silky material means it’s super light and folds up to barely anything: as a result, it’s been stuffed into my pack throughout long-term travels in Asia and South America, has visited dozens of other countries and is always in my bag even when I’m in London. There’s nothing like the ‘internal-high-five’ I feel when I successfully avoid using a plastic bag in a shop!

Onya now only sell their products in Australia, but there are plenty of other reusable bags out there – like Baggu bags and these foldable totes from Bee Green.

Price: from £8 on Amazon

TOMS slipon shoes

I first discovered TOMS shoes when living in San Francisco in 2009, when I put them on and immediately felt like I was walking on clouds.

I virtually wore out that first pair while traipsing the SF cement, the bright lights of Vegas, the Chicago cityscape and the muggy air of New Orleans – and when I brought them back to England, I continued wearing them around my university town until my toes got too cold (alas they’re only really suitable for warmer temperatures). Eventually TOMS were stocked in the UK and now I find myself buying a pair every summer.

The classic TOMS are lightweight which makes them easy to pack, they’re comfortable for a full day of walking around, and they look casual-smart enough to wear in a range of different scenarios. They’re made from natural hemp, organic cotton and recycled polyester, while their shoeboxes are made from recycled post-consumer waste.

But most importantly, TOMS operate under a ‘Buy One, Give One’ model: for every purchase you make, they donate a pair of shoes to a child in poverty. As of today, TOMS have given away 86 million pairs of shoes to children – and most recently the founder, Blake Mycoskie, has donated $5 million towards ending gun violence in the US.

NB: If you’re a US citizen, you can go to TOMS.com and send a physical postcard to your Congress representative urging them to pass universal background checks.

Get them from £13 on Amazon

LUSH solid shampoo and conditioner

Travel-sized toiletries, though somewhat adorable in stature, have always felt like a huge waste of plastic. Despite only washing my hair twice a week I still run out of travel sized shampoo on long trips – and if I travel with carry-on only, there’s no way I’m using up my liquid allowance with a full sized bottle of shampoo!

Enter: solid shampoo. This stuff can take some getting used to at first, but it’s an undeniably useful product to travel with. A single LUSH Solid Shampoo Bar can last for about 80 washes and is made from natural ingredients and essential oils.

I store mine in a silver tin which doubles as somewhere to place the bar when showering (if there’s a ledge available). Simply run the bar a few times over wet hair to create a lather. Make sure you don’t pack the bar away when still damp though, as it can melt away a bit. I’ve patted mine dry with toilet paper then had to pick tiny specks of paper off it again – so any tips aside from air-drying are welcome!

Available on the LUSH website from £7.50

Go-Toob squeeze bottles

If you’re like me and have really dry hair, sometimes you have to use a particular brand of liquid shampoo – which is where Go-Toob comes in handy.

Most refillable bottles are hard plastic, making it really difficult to shake out whatever substance you’ve got inside. Go-Toobs are soft, squeezable, reusable bottles made from silicone, with a wide lip for easy filling and a no-leak valve. They’re small enough for airline carry-on, easy to wash out before reusing, and there’s even a designated space on the cap to write what product is inside.

I first picked up a trio of Go-Toob’s reusable bottles when I was packing for South America, and now they’re a requisite element of my travel wash bag. One holds shampoo, another has body moisturiser, and the third is a spare for suncream or whatever else I might need.

Available from £16 for a set of three bottles on Amazon

Reusable water bottle

Reusable water bottles are one of the easiest eco-friendly switches to make: they’re cheaper than buying bottled water and they greatly reduce wasted plastic. 

I have a few in my collection: two different sizes of Ion8 bottles made from BPA-free plastic, and two metal bottles from Klean Kanteen – one with a wide lip and one with a sports cap. I find the latter easiest for travel because although a wide-lipped bottle is aesthetically appealing, it has the ability to jolt against my teeth if I’m not standing perfectly still. After an accident in the school playground where I broke my front tooth, I’m now really cautious about possible teeth-related accidents!

A word of warning when travelling: always check whether the tap water is safe to drink. If you’re unsure, you can use water purification tablets or a LifeStraw.

Price: from £18.95 on Amazon

Mooncup

After years of worrying about developing Toxic Shock Syndrome from tampons, I started using a menstrual cup when I went to South America and I’ve never looked back.

For female travellers, menstrual cups are a no-brainer: gone are the days of using up precious backpack space with tampons, or running the risk of not being able to buy them in your destination. But they’re really eco-friendly too. The average person goes through approximately 11,000 pads and/or tampons in their lifetime, all of which end up in landfill: in comparison, you only need to replace your menstrual cup every few years.

A Mooncup is made of soft medical-grade silicone which you fold and put inside yourself, where it then pops into its original shape and creates a seal with your cervix. To remove, you simply pinch the base of the cup and pull on the stem, then empty it out and clean before using again (a tip: it’s handy to take a water bottle to public toilets for this part!).

It’s understandably a bit nerve-wracking to use a menstrual cup the first few times, but you get the hang of it pretty quickly. And again, Mooncups give you longer lasting protection than other sanitary products so when you’re travelling and don’t have constant access to a toilet, there’s no panic about changing it in time! If you’re someone like me, who often suffers from thrush (which once happened after using a tampon for too long on an 18 hour night bus ride from Poland to Lithuania with a locked on-board toilet and no stops…), the non-absorbency of a menstrual cup means no dryness, which is also a lifesaver.

There are two sizes of Mooncup: choose A if you’re aged 30 or older or have given birth vaginally at any age, and B if you’re under 30 and haven’t given birth.

Price: from £21.99 on Mooncup’s site

[Image: Mama Loup’s Den]

THINX underwear

The second element to my eco-friendly period game are THINX: period underwear which are made with various absorbent materials to prevent any leaks. I ordered two pairs of these babies all the way from the US. Shipping costs were a bit of an annoyance, but nonetheless they’re bloody fantastic. Pun intended.

THINX are only slightly thicker than normal underwear, and come in six different styles with various levels of absorbency, including bikinis, boy shorts and thongs. I wear them along with my Mooncup for maximum peace of mind on the first few days of my cycle, but they’re also great to use before your period arrives so you can avoid spotting in regular underwear.

Cleaning THINX is pretty easy: just soak them in cold water first and then either handwash or chuck them in a cold washing cycle without fabric softener (as it can affect the antimicrobial materials). They do take a while to air dry, so it’s worth having more than one pair.

As with menstrual cups, using period underwear saves you using non-recyclable one-use sanitary products which end up in landfill.

(NB: If you’d be interested in an honest review about my experiences with THINX, let me know in the comments!)

Prices start from £27 at THINX (get £8 off your first purchase!)

Ethnotek backpack

My favourite backpack brand is Ethnotek, an ethically responsible social enterprise which use handmade textiles from artisans all over the world, from Vietnam and Ghana to Indonesia, Guatemala and India. 

I’d been following Ethnotek for a long time, but I was finally able to meet the two founders, Cori and Jake, in Bali earlier this year. We had brunch in an Ubud cafe and chatted about their passion for keeping traditional handcraft practices alive.

Sadly many local artisans are seeing less and less demand for their work, with handmade products being replaced by factories and machines which leads to loss of jobs and ultimately the disappearance of handicrafts. That’s why it’s so important to see Ethnotek creating new demand for these traditional practices by featuring tie-dye, batik, block printing, embroidery and handloom weaving on its bags.

Available from $89 at Ethnotek. Use the code ‘FLORA10’ at checkout for a 10% discount!

Reusable cotton rounds

Once I realised how wasteful it is to use disposable face wipes, cotton balls and cotton pads, I spent ages searching the internet high and low for reusable alternatives. It took a long time to find a stockist who wasn’t in the US and could deliver to England, but eventually Etsy came to my rescue.

A set of organic cotton rounds easily replace other single-use products: simply pop your cleanser or toner on the pad and use as normal, but then put them in the wash afterwards (courtesy of the thoughtfully included laundry bag!). Mine are made from two layers of cotton, along with a layer of antibacterial bamboo towelling on one side: as it’s slightly rougher, it removes more makeup!

My only issue with reusable cotton rounds is that some of them have stained slightly from over use, so I’d recommend handwashing them with some soap and warm water sooner rather than later.

Price: from £9 on Amazon

Bamboo toothbrush

You know there’s a global crisis when a company willingly gives away their product for free in the hopes of changing people’s minds for the better. 

When I saw an advert from ‘Giving Brush’ on Facebook I didn’t believe them at first – but when my free bamboo rainbow toothbrush arrived in the mail a few weeks later, I suddenly realised how irresponsible it is to use plastic toothbrushes which need to be changed every few months.

The handle is made from bamboo, a natural plant-based material so it will eventually biodegrade, and the bristles are made from nylon – not super recyclable, although some companies use the biodegradable ‘nylon4’.

Available from £8.99 for a pack of four on Amazon

What eco-friendly products do you travel with? Is there any product you wish could become more environmentally conscious?

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