#and she said yeah go for it so i chased him around whacking him with my book for like five whole minutes

[speakercrab666]

lmao mum was talking about these friends of friends i’ve met like twice ever and i didn’t remember who they were until i remembered being 12 years old and repeatedly whacking the dad with my book (while still keeping my page) for making a gay joke, after sitting through like an hour of the intensely feminist mum (heart in the right place, very misguided) insisting that i was oppressed and subconsciously ashamed of my body (i wasn’t) bc i refused to shave my legs but also ‘hid’ them by wearing pants a lot.

shaving is pointless if ur 12 and autistic and have no concept of the social expectation that gives many young girls that final push to start shaving, and pants are great when ur 12 and autistic and obsessed with collecting as many different colours of skinny jeans as possible bc they’re comfy and u love colours.

also their daughter was ANNOYING. she has a baby now tho which is alright bc i do actually think she’s smart as well as annoying.

[jungle-angel]

Three's Company But Four Is The Best Crowd (Calvin Evans x Reader)

Summary: You and Calvin were not expecting to take on a new member of the family at all, but in the end, it was the best decision you had ever made

Warnings: Parenthood, mentions of birth etc.

Tagging: @floydsmuse My dear, I hope this brightens the day a little bit, I hope it's not too much but it's something

"So technically he didn't get the question wrong but they whacked him on it anyways," Calvin rattled off as you and him walked up the street with Ellen in her little stroller and Six-Thirty on his leash.

"Are you serious?" you asked him. "Why? Arnie is one of your smartest students."

"Because he screwed up one of the formulas for balancing a reaction in a base compound and it ended with making a substance that smelled like a noxious fart," Calvin chuckled.

"So that's who the stinkbomb culprit was!" you blurted out. "I knew it!"

"I kept telling Arnie that he's gonna have to start a stinkbomb business," Calvin chuckled. "He might even end up getting a contract from the Secretary of Defense if he's lucky."

Your laughter was suddenly interrupted when something darted around the hedgerows, startling the both of you and Six-Thirty who began barking. To your amazement, it was a frightened little cocker spaniel with curly ears and a squished little nose. She whimpered and whined, pawing at both you and Calvin, begging as though she were in danger of something.

"What in the blue hell is this?" Calvin wondered.

From around the corner you could hear the shouts of miscreants and a familiar one at that, Frieda Burns's grandsons, Dean and Ritchie. They came around the corner with the rest of their neighborhood bullies but stopping dead in their tracks when they saw Calvin and you standing nearby.

"Where's that dog?" Dean demanded.

"Yeah where'd it go?" Ritchie cut in.

"I don't think you two little shitheads deserve to know," Calvin answered coldly.

"Listen Calvin," Ritchie spat.

"That's Mr. Evans to you, you little twerps," Calvin reminded them sharply. "Didn't your mother ever teach you manners and respect for your elders?"

"Ma doesn't care what we do," Dean retorted.

"Yeah," said Ritchie.

You and Calvin both glanced at each other before turning your attention back to the boys. "Oh," Calvin said. "Well in that case perhaps we ought to tell someone else then. (Y/n) what do you think?"

"Oh certainly," you answered. "The last thing I'd want is for Father McDowell to find out about this little incident."

Both Ritchie and Dean swallowed hard, their little adam's apples bobbing in their throats. Every neighborhood bully feared the fiery Irish Catholic priest who ran both St. Mary's church and his end of the block like a Navy ship. More than once a big, tough bully had the gall to act up in front of the good father, only to be met with a birch rod on his backside.

"What in the damned hell is all that yellin fer?!" thundered a voice from behind the hedgerows. "Blast it! Can't a man work in 'is own bloody garden in peace?!"

"Shit! It's him!"

"Run for it!"

Six-Thirty barked and growled at them as they ran away, tugging at his leash and wanting nothing more than to go after them. "Go get'em boy!" Calvin ordered.

He loosed Six-Thirty from his leash, the dog taking off like a bullet as Father McDowell continued to thunder a string of obscenities from behind the hedgerows. The other bullies had scattered, but Six-Thirty had returned chasing Dean and Ritchie back up the block, the two of them clutching their backsides to keep from getting bitten before running smack into the priest.

"Well, well, what've we here?" Father McDowell chuckled icily. "Jest as I suspected, Dean'n Ritchie Burns. What'd ye two get into this time now eh? Breakin the windas down at Mr. Kennedy's lunch counter again are ye?"

The boys tried to make an excuse as Father McDowell grabbed ahold of each of their ears, the priest's wrath incurred even further when he caught sight of the frightened little spaniel.

"Oh-ho!" he concluded. "Chasin a stray were yas? Jest like your miserable excuse of a father and uncle ye are."

"Go to hell!" the boys shouted.

"Now don't ye gimme that!" the priest snapped. "I ever hear it outta either o' yer mouths again, I'll string ye both up by the balls by thunder! Now get yer skeeter bitten carcasses home to yer mudder!"

Dean and Ritchie took off, both terrified of their ordeal. Father McDowell gave a bullish snort as soon as they were out of earshot. "Detestable little piss worms," he hissed under his breath.

"Sorry to ruin your afternoon Padre," Calvin laughed.

"Bah!" Father McDowell said with a wave of his hand. "T'weren't nothin. Makes fer an interestin breakup in the mundane of it I always say. Now why don't the two of ye come into the garden fer a bit, Helen'll be home soon."

"I think we'll have to save it for another day Padre," you said. "We weren't counting on any of this."

Father McDowell tried to pet the poor little cocker but she backed away, a high pitched whine catching in her throat. "Poor little thing," he sighed. "I've seen'er down by Kennedy's lunch counter."

"Any chance the vet's office is open?" Calvin asked.

"Nah," Father McDowell said. "Last I saw they close 'round suppertime. Best bet would be for'er to go home with ye and go in the mornin."

You and Calvin scooped up the little dog and bid Father McDowell farewell before heading for home. You both thought it a little odd and funny that she refused to leave Six-Thirty's side, the same going for your beloved companion.

Back to the house you went where Pat and Henny were out on the front porch, waiting for Henny's husband Paul, to close up his barbershop and bring the girls back from her sister's house.

"You two are back early," Pat remarked.

"And it looks like they brought a little friend with'em," Henny laughed, setting her glass of peach lemonade down on the porch table.

"Funny story Henny," you chuckled, lifting Ellen from her stroller.

"Oh honey I heard it all," Henny laughed. "Marshall came runnin all the way back from the store and he could hear the good father givin the Burns boys hell."

You and Calvin went into the house to get Ellen settled and dinner ready, hoping that Henny and Paul would stay with their granddaughters. You found an extra one of Six-Thirty's food bowls and filled it with a little bit of food, the little cocker eagerly coming to eat and gobbling up her foot as though she hadn't eaten in years.

Sure enough, Paul came by with his and Henny's two youngest granddaughters, Betsy and Ruby, the four of them staying for dinner. By the time they had left, you and Calvin noticed Six-Thirty and his new little friend, laying together on his bed cushion near the window, neither of them wanting to get up as he lay his head on top of hers.

You had just given Ellen her bath while Calvin was reading to her from her little bedtime storybook, gently rocking back and forth in the rocking chair in her nursery. By the time she had been tucked in and had fallen asleep, you peeked back downstairs to find your two canine companions fast asleep.

"That is the oddest sight I have ever seen," you chuckled.

"Who would have ever thought that Six-Thirty would find a mate?" Calvin remarked, smiling broadly.

"Well, you and I found each other so it's not entirely out of the ordinary," you said.

Calvin pressed a kiss to your forehead and several down the side of your head and cheek before pressing a lingering kiss to your lips. "You know she's gonna need a dog license, papers and a collar and her tags."

"We can do all that tomorrow," you laughed.

You and Calvin turned in for the night, eager to officially welcome your new little friend into the family.

[legacyshenanigans]

I've been fairly busy since I woke up today, but now that i'm settled I've got another one of my lucid dreams which I had today. To (mildly) entertain you all with 🤣

Just incase anyone doesn't know what Lucid dreaming means, it means KNOWING you're dreaming which happens to me pretty regularly. Weirdly sometimes I can control the whole dream, but sometimes I can't, like this one, things have to play out as they are, but I'm just fully aware it's a dream and can control myself but not my surroundings. Also, usually, to wake myself up from these dreams, I tend to just tell a person in my dream that I know I'm dreaming, some crazy, creepy shit will happen, then I wake up. Anyway, onto the dream haha.

So, I was at an airport with my partners parents and his sister, and weirdly, my partner wasn't there. We sat at an airport bar, and his sister hands me a 5-pound note and says, "Can you go and buy me a can of sweetcorn?" I said yeah and took the money and wandered off. The airport was massive and there was plenty of shops, but I thought to myself "Where the fuck am I gonna get a can of sweetcorn? Do you they even sell cans of sweetcorn in airports?" So I was going in every shop, just looking around.

Then I came to an area that had a bunch of massage chairs in it, and saw my Nanna on one of them, and I thought "Oh cool, my Nannas in this dream" so I wandered over to her and said Hi, she asked me what I was doing there? And I told her "I can only assume I'm going on holiday with me being in an airport" then I asked her if she was going on holiday too, and she said "airport? We're at my house"

I turned around to look and I was indeed suddenly at my Nannas house, I turned back towards her and she was just sat at her dining room table, I then asked her if she had a can sweetcorn 🤣 and she looked at me like I was a weirdo, then I thought to myself "Oh wait a minute, this is a new dream segment, I don't need to worry about the fuckin sweetcorn anymore." But I felt in my pocket that I still had the money my fellas sister had given me, so I pulled it out and looked at it, and it turned from a 5 pound note to hundreds of pounds worth of notes. And my Nanna said, "That's a lot of money," and I was like "Yeah" and shoved it back into my pocket, and she said, "Give it to me?" So I was like,"Nah, this is mine, " and my Nanna casually whacked out a knife and threatened me, saying, "Give. Me. The money." So I was like "the fuck?" And ran out of her house and was in the local town, I saw a Morrisons (UK supermarket) and ran over to it and went inside.

There was NOBODY in there, it was just me, and I remember thinking "Where are all the people? Why is nobody in here?" Then I turned down an aisle, and saw my Nanna again at the other end, with the knife, and she yet again said "Give me that money!" And she started running towards me fast as fuck and I was like "Nanna what the fuck are you doing?!" So I started running away from her as she chased me around the supermarket, but everytime I looked back at her she was changing into something else. In the end I looked back and she'd turned into this REALLY tall, bald man, who kinda looked like Withers from BG3 🤣.

I kept running, but my feet were getting tired and I was out of breath, then I thought "I don't even need this fuckin money, I'm in a fuckin dream" so I turned around to this freaky bald man and I was like "Take it!!" And threw the money at him, but he just laughed and carried on chasing me. So I started running again, but got fuckin sick of it and thought to myself "I'm gonna have to put an end to this dream" so I turned and I did the thing that I knew usually woke up form these dreams, and I said to the dude "I know I'm dreaming right now, this ain't real" and he froze on the spot and didn't move again, but I didn't wake up! So I was like "For fuck sake." So I headed towards the exit to leave the supermarket and the doors were gone, then I was like "Great, I'm stuck in this dream, in an empty fuckin Morrisons" So I was wandering around and I went down the chilled goods aisle looking for this yogurt I really wanted and wondered if I'd be able to eat it in my dream 🤣 then a fucking HAND darted out of one of the fridges and grabbed me and I was like "The fuck?!" I turned to look and it was my Nanna again, but normal and herself, and she said "Come into the fridge and you'll wake up" and I remember thinking "Anything to get out of this fucking dream" so I entered the fridge which turned into a long, dark, cold hallway, I was freezing and turned to look at where my Nanna was, but she was gone, and so was the door to the fridge, I was just in the middle of a dark, cold everlasting hallway, and I said, "Nan?"

....Nothing....

So I shouted really loudly and angrily

"Nanna?! Where you at?!"

And I woke up.

So there you go, another weird ass dream from me. 🤣🤣🤣

[addie-henderson]

Percy lets out a disgruntled ‘ack!’ as he gets smacked in the back of the head with a pillow, turning around just in time to watch the culprit(reader) run down the hall. Debating whether or not he should chase after you for a total of five seconds he quickly stands up and sprints after you. “Hey get back here that wasn’t fair! I wasn’t ready!” shouting as he sprints down the hall, snatching a pillow from the nearby couch and sharply turning the corner. Just in time to see you hide behind annabeth, who was in the middle of writing something, probably for her classes. “hey that’s not fair either!” his only answer was a pillow to the face, huffing in mild disbelief he crossed his arms and stood in the entrance as the pillow flopped onto the floor “you can’t hide behind her forever!” he smiled, said smile quickly slipped from his face when annabeth patted your head and continued working “Annie, that’s not fair! Don’t take her side!” he protested, rolling his eyes at your tactics “I’m not ‘taking her side’ Percy.” annabeth smiled innocently as you stick your tongue out at him.

is this cringy? Can I send you things like this?😭

oh its so easy to buy Annabeth's vote with a kiss, honestly.

the chore chart indicated it was his turn to do dishes. he hated that stupid chore chart. it was almost done (thank every God ever) and then he could go play video games in peace. that's all he wanted really a day of peace. you would think after saving the world two times and going on a bajillion quest he would deserve a day of peace. but no he thought as he was whacked in the back of the head he can't escape war even in his own home.

Percy lets out a disgruntled ‘ack!’ as he gets smacked in the back of the head with a pillow, turning around just in time to watch the culprit run down the hall. Debating whether or not he should chase after you for a total of five seconds he quickly stands up and sprints after you.

“Hey get back here that wasn’t fair! I wasn’t ready!” shouting as he sprints down the hall, snatching a pillow from the nearby couch and sharply turning the corner. Just in time to see you hide behind Annabeth, who was in the middle of writing something, probably for her classes.

“hey that’s not fair either!” his only answer was a pillow to the face, huffing in mild disbelief he crossed his arms and stood in the entrance as the pillow flopped onto the floor you wiggle yourself onto Annabeth's lap poking your tongue out at him from across her shoulder as you rest your head against hers. she shuffles absent-mindedly to typing one-handed on her laptop to hold you. you kiss her cheek softly and she hums in a soft acknowledgment of your presence.

“you can’t hide behind her forever!” he smiled, said smile quickly slipped from his face when Annabeth patted your head and continued working “Annie, that’s not fair! Don’t take her side!” he protested, rolling his eyes at your tactics

“I’m not ‘taking her side’ Percy.” annabeth smiled innocently as you stick your tongue out at him again.

'this. is. war.' you mouth to him with a fake grin of innocence.

"youre a monster." he whispers back, making you giggle followed by annabeth slightly less than gently tapping your bottom in her lap.

"stop antagonizing."

"yes ma'am." you huff with an eye roll behind her back. Percy pursed his lips together in a moment of consideration while you were distracted. he bends to pick up the pillow he dropped slowly before calling out to you.

"babe?"

"hm?" both you and Annabeth sound off at the same time only to be smacked with a flying pillow to the face and back of the head respectively. Annabeth's fingers stop typing and she stiffens under you.

"Run now, Perseus."

"yeah, you got it-" he bolts out of the room, and she stands dropping you to your feet and grabs a pillow.

"THIS IS WAR!!" you shout in childlike glee and Percy smiles from down the hall because at least his girl is having fun... even if his other girl is going to murder him.

[dnangelic]

skimmed LN vol 3 out of curiosity (no massive translation post just yet because i'd like to go back to it when i'm fresher-minded) but i do have some fun bullet points from the whole thing overall. for anybody who doesn't know the plot summary, the gist of the novel is dark and daisuke's next target is a pair of glass shoes, like cinderella's, only a cute lil girl (maho? more sugisaki-esque wordplay probably cause there's a lot of 'magic(mahou) isn't real you idiots/magic is very real you idiots' in this book) and her older brother named sagami who looks veeery similar to dark shows up and stuff starts happening.

dark trying to find a place to land so he can turn back into daisuke includes him, at one point, landing near a senior citizen area only for all of said senior citizens to turn out to be retired/ex-police officers that chase him waving around their walking sticks ready to beat and whack his ass

dark feeling a sharp, intense pain in his heart when daisuke worriedly suggests that hiwatari's methods are becoming more and more unlike himself and desperate. BUT even though he notices it, daisuke doesn't push on dark's reaction and dark too entirely ignores everything that just happened by changing the topic too to looking forward to seeing how cute riku is on the date they're supposed to head to. fucker

daisuke gives riku his shoes to wear and goes barefoot when her feet start hurting because she’s not used to wearing anything but sneakers!! riku gives in and puts them on from him because she knows he’d insist until she did.

dark tries to have a serious conversation with daisuke at one point but daisuke's only responding/talking and saying 'yeah' in his sleep until dark realizes it and YELLS AT HIM (MORONS (AFFECTIONATE))

or this part: [ 'i could carry riku myself.' sure, he might be smaller than the average boy his age but if it was for riku... 'if i were as tall and strong as dark and sagami, i'd be...' ] <- cut to dark 'maliciously laughing' and saying 'then you should've just transformed into me!' to which daisuke obviously calls a ridiculous suggestion

or this part. ['dark... i just don't want riku to feel bad because of me.' "---i'm the same way." daisuke was startled by the unexpectedly quiet voice. that's right, dark loves riku just like himself, but she hates him. i feel sorry for him, but it's weird for me to comfort him... as daisuke pondered this, dark continued. "---i want all girls to be happy." 'people hate me because of that kind of attitude!' feeling like he could see dark grinning instead of himself reflected in the glass, daisuke closed the curtains. (fucker x2)

‘you wouldn’t understand, because you’re not like other people.’ ‘naaaaturally.’ <- dark (fucker x3)

riku still has the camping picture she bought of herself and daisuke from the 2nd LN 😭!! the whole scene with her breaking the ice after daisuke's been trapped and transformed within it into dark's appearance, daisuke only regards as riku being 'desperate' and trying to save him from the 'nightmare' too. he hasn't actually brought himself to confess anything yet and still wavers in his insecurities over not being strong enough for riku and blames dark's existence for a lot of his unhappiness too in a harsh single line again, a la '[...] if dark weren't here, everything in the world would have been right'/all these problems could have been avoided

sagami 😭

sagami 😂

SAGAMI 😂😂😂

daisuke actually turns into dark at one point at school and promptly hides in a bathroom while casually being mistaken for sagami by saehara, sekimoto and risa. then when he jumps out a window and flies off they're all 'THAT WAS DARK?!?!?!'

sagami's sister is soooooo cute. she's around elementary school age and mistakes dark for a wizard (angels have gold hair and white wings, but you wear black clothes so you're a wizard!) AND dark also politely drops on a knee and treats her like a princess with complete sincerity and tenderness the whole entire time once they actually meet. the glass shoes light up different depending on whoever touches it (blue for a truth, red for a lie,) and when dark makes a straightforward promise to her about sagami's successful future the shoes light up a strong blue in response to him. ohhh i love dark so much scumbag KING

she also gives dark a surprise kiss on the cheek that 'feels like two cherry blossom petals' and fr he deserved that. all is right in the world

the next morning. 'my sister said she wanted to grow up to marry dark so now i'm getting a haircut.' SAGAMI!!!!! 😂😂😂

'i'll do my best to make sure that kaitou dark doesn't steal my work!' <- said playful statement IMMEDIATELY causing daisuke to stand up and respond without thinking 'in that case, i'll definitely go steal it.' IN FRONT OF HIS WHOLE CLASS!!

hiwatari very nearly did strangle dark and daisuke to an asphyxiated blackout if not flat out, outright, straight up death. that is a thing that happens. it does. and that was after psychic blasting wiz and dark with magic music to intense, excruciating pain already too. my god man. afterwards daisuke happily tells hiwatari good morning at school and hiwatari's described as surprised and hesitant at daisuke's greeting because yeah no kidding. fuckin. dai vc apparently: it's okay we're best friends so you try to kill me all the time!

honestly i think the second/snow queen LN is still probably my favorite holistically followed by the very first LN but this one really wasn't too bad either. the overall message is a pretty easy to digest 'just be yourself and don't run away from the potential of your future!' whether it's by trying to copy others while lacking legitimate self confidence or denying yourself/giving up by saying everything's hopeless and it's too late, and sagami isn't a bad character either for being quite literally a knockoff art-teacher dark with like, a real human life and siscon accusations. he's good burnt out college kid rep i like him, plus he actually got daisuke pissed enough to be described as looking/acting almost like dark (possessive-protective) for a page, which, nice. dark even gives sagami a whole entire little tough-love motivational spiel and simultaneously tells him to be proud of being capable of making 'good copies' and sagami grumbles about it all later too going like 'why should anybody even listen to that guy when he's a thief!!!' which like, okay, ungrateful, but funny.

in any case i'd very much like to implement the events of this LN too into my portrayal in whatever regards i can or feel like, so that's proooobably what i'll do!

[calypso-finale]

Hundred Twenty Seven. Part 3

Rylee is trying to make the boys play nicer because poor Emi wants to be involved and I don’t blame her, she is bored listening to us just talk. The way Damson is just not caring and has gone to the water with Aziel, sometimes I watch him, and I am like he is ready to be a dad, I need to make him one but then when we talk, he don’t sound ready but then again are you ever ready to be a parent, I think it’s hard for anyone at any age to be one. My brothers do not want Emi there, I get it because Emi will go home and tell dad they hit the ball on her head too but what can we say, she is born in the wrong era and being the youngest. Watching Rylee walk back over to me, Oakley is checking her out so bad, like he can relax “he’s watching you so intently” I said to her, she looked behind and then put a finger up at him “why did you do that?” she sat back down “because he kept saying what wedding, what wedding. I decline, just being stupid for them two idiot brothers but anyways. Do you have slight fine hair on your boobs?” she is so random “erm, no why?” I am so confused “well I do, out of nowhere too. It’s just fine so I didn’t realise this right, maybe I am just not paying attention to my body but watching TV in bed, and Oakley does this weird shit with me, see he doesn’t look loving, but that boy wants to live in my skin so it’s fine and he’s doing his weird thing, he goes I didn’t know you had a hairy chest. I slapped him away, like the slap was hard, his skin was red. I got mad, and then he got mad at me for hitting him but like you just told me I have a hairy chest. Then I peeped, I kind of do, then I googled it, hormone related. The girl that waxes me said oh yeah so does she, it happens but like how fucking random? Why now” now she is making me look at my own “have I?” staring at my own boobs, Rylee looked at me “no, but look at mine” bringing my face closer “oh it’s slightly but nothing bad, ignore him. You know what men are like, I had slight hair on my face and he said, growing a beard I see, they are weird” she rolled her eyes, my sister gets so temperamental “don’t worry about it, I am sure he didn’t say it again” I chuckled, I know she whacked him because of her reaction.

My hands on my hips watching these men, I mean boys argue about who can run faster, like they are making it a big deal “you haven’t ran away from police in your life handsome man” Oakley said to Damson “so you want the police to chase a black man because you know your white ass is going to be overlooked” rolling my eyes “oh boys, it’s nothing. You both ran the same” trying to shut them up “I bet you can’t lift my sister up, let’s see if you’re strong” Junior is piping up “he can barely hold himself” I swatted Damson “I can, I have literally picked Rylee up when she was pregnant, don’t get that twisted” Oakley is getting temperamental “ok boys, testosterone is hitting. Let’s go” clapping my hands “nah you can’t be saying that and thinking I can’t prove it” Damson screamed laughing “my guy is mad, you’re mad. I believe you; I know you can” that one thing Junior said pissed him off “nah why people think I can’t do anything, I can pick her up. How else your sister got pregnant, she was just laying down with her legs open” Rylee placed her hand over Oakley mouth, Damson screamed out laughing “oh god” trying to not laugh “stop it” he started the mess “don’t say that” Rylee scolded him “they are my little brothers, leave them” Junior is red, he understands loud and clear what he meant “I am just proving a point, I ain’t having some kid chatting it” Damson made his way over to Oakley “my guy, you stupid bro” he started this “ignore him boys” Junior isn’t happy “he still weak, I can beat him up. I am going to be taller then him” I gasped “Junior, what is wrong with you” walking over to him “he is talking shit” he pointed “hey, you started. The grown men were joking, it’s ok” wrapping my arms around him “this is the funniest shit, bro said your sister wasn’t just laying down. Violation” Damson makes everything worse “funs over, Damson. Stop!” I said to him, he put his hands up.

The drive home in the SUV is quiet, I mean Oakley and Damson are in the back whispering but still “that escalated so quick” I said in a whisper to Rylee “I know, one minute we was laughing and the next, I think it’s because he spoke up, Oakley didn’t like it. I am not sure if Junior has said some previously but tell me why that boy was puffing his chest out” I shrugged “Junior, come here” Rylee waved him over “I just need to know why it turned to be so aggressive like what happened there” she has a point “what happened? Did something happen that you had to speak, they are men talking and joking you can’t be making comments” she said to him “I will beat him up one day” I frowned “no way of speaking like that, why are you saying this now?” I questioned “because when Rylee walked off back to sit down he said like things, rude things and then like Uncle Herb said to me a while back that I should be older brother and make these guys show respect and that nobody respects me” rolling my eyes “Herb is always high and on gang, ignore him. He just wants to be a gangbanger but that ain’t you, we all respect you here, don’t do that. You have a nice bond with everyone, don’t have hate in your heart” he sighed, Herb is stupid at times “what did he say that upset you? Tell me so I can tell him off about it, you come to me about it. That ain’t you at all” Rylee pointed “he said to Damson that you are so sexy, and he is going to do things” Rylee pressed her lips into a hard thin line trying to not laugh “he didn’t mean it in a bad way” I said, “eating ass?” I gasped “Oakley!” Rylee spat “ignore those words, just pretend he didn’t say anything” that is funny though “do not say those things again, like rude things in front of my brothers” Rylee said, “I didn’t say anything to them?” Oakley defended “see I can tell him off, don’t you get rude again” I think we will be laughing once they get out of this car.

Once the boys got out of the car “Oakley, he was mad at you. He heard you say about eating Rylee ass” I had to say it “he heard that? Was I that loud” I chuckled “clearly, but he feels like you don’t respect him that is all. Calm down, you’re on heat aren’t you” Oakley shrugged “you had a good time?” my mom asked “we did, it was nice mom” Rylee smiled at her “come to the house, all of you. A little family meal” raising an eyebrow “is it a meal or a meeting?” I am not sure about my mom “maybe but come, you’re summoned” my mom walked off “Oakley, can you next to time not say those things. My brothers are growing, and they don’t need to hear that, he didn’t like it” Oakley laughed “I didn’t know he heard me, I was just saying it. Your ass looked big, like out there. What did you want me to say” shaking my head “well just remember they are around, and Junior understands it more now, just talk to him when you can. I don’t think any boy would want to hear that” Damson smiled “he was annoying me all this time” I believe it “Damson is a troll, don’t let him get to you!” I spat, he does it to me all the time to me. Side eyeing him laughing,

Turning the camera to my face, pressing record “how do you feel to be a passenger princess” Rylee speaks right at the same at moment when I pressed record, I laughed as I left it recording “it’s alright you know” turning my phone slightly “I got a shooter, and I got a driver. They want that heat, I'm the only provider. Little bad foreign bitch” Rylee rapped along, either she is driving or singing “with my little princess” she is a trip, shaking my head laughing stopping the recording “I need you to drive more though, do it back home” she is very happy to be home, I can sense it from her a lot, she is more comfortable “no, I’m ok thanks. I prefer it here” adding a caption ‘riding with the boss’ pressing send “I can tell, how come them two didn’t come with you? Concerns me they don’t like your driving” looking over at her “I am safe, please. She said they will meet us there, I hate when my mother summons anyone, she is always up to something” I won’t be shocked if it’s something she wants “you seem happier though, after that whole thing with North and that” I want her to be happy, I dislike when she is upset “I don’t care anymore, I am happy. Like who cares what a bitter bitch like her thinks. But Oakley, I have a slight feeling that they are going to ask about the wedding, so I just want you to be aware and have the answers, I don’t want you to be stuck and stuff so whatever you decide I’m happy with that” nodding my head “I have been thinking about the whole wedding thing, it does scare me in a way. Just not something I am used to seeing, I was just thinking that what I would say, I’ve never worn a suit, then I’m like how would I react when I see you, like realistically me and you on paper don’t match, people don’t see us” I admitted “when did you have such a deep thought, are you scared to marry?” Looking over at Rylee “erm, a little. The whole traditional thing, I don’t exactly want it to be huge either. I want it to be the most private, because I am nervous” Rylee looked at me “then we will have it private Oakley, promise. Make sure of that, I am nervous too. But like I do know what is expected, I get it. And really, if you want we can elope” smiling at her “nah, we can’t do that but like yeah, just a small thing. I’m happy and yeah I’ll accept your parents doing it, but I have been thinking. I am scared, but I am happy at the same time too. Like you don’t understand how much I didn’t know what love was, I still find it hard to comprehend a lot of the times. But I was for the streets, that was my love, you know. I just you know, I uhm. I saw you and yeah, I just wish you wasn’t young. I think it did hinder me a lot, and then you was Chris daughter, that was even worse, I was like shit” Rylee reached her hand over “you have been thinking a lot haven’t you” smiling at her “already written my vows” Rylee gasped “no way?” I smiled wide “I am calm about things and slow but trust me, I’m there” I’m all feelings today, let me stop “what’s wrong with you today” I shrugged smiling.

I need to just keep my mouth shut, like I didn’t even mean to come at her little brother, but I didn’t even know he was listening to me either, Rylee was looking good, and I said it aloud. Waving at Emi, she is cute though. She always just waves at me but never like comes up to me “the summoned crew have arrived” Rylee said, I would have rather stayed at the house really “oh hell no, what is she doing here?” my ears perked up, then seeing Imani “Rylee, she is still a part of the family, we can’t just stop her being around with us” Robyn said “and when you have your wedding she has to be around” Rylee tells me every time about not starting anything, and every time she does she is always losing her shit about something, it makes me laugh really “she isn’t welcome, are you sure Juke isn’t here too? I don’t want to eat food with someone like that, she tried to ruin my relationship, I want that unstable bitch removed” chewing on my bottom lip watching the drama unfold “Rylee” Chris said “she leaves or I do?” I guess we will be going home “Imani can choke, and on top of that she bought the very boy I was trying to keep her safe from? Like are you kidding me, and then she spoke so much shit about me to Juke, like you was spiteful. I want to beat you up right now, like your face makes me mad. Either she stays or I go” Rylee is so mad; I think she means it too “allow it” I said “what?” Rylee spat “I said allow it, don’t allow someone to affect your emotions. The wedding is our wedding yeah, this home is your parents. You come here as a visitor, they want their daughter here, like they want you here. Allow it, you’re going to allow it, we ain’t starting nothing are we?” Rylee sighed out “Oakley” she said, “sit down, come” I walked into the room “hey” dapping Chris, the look on Chris’ face it was shock all over his face, sitting down “why?” she said as she sat down “because this isn’t a battle you need yeah, you said that with Juke, I am saying that to you” she side eyed me “hate you” she leaned against me which made me laugh, putting my arm around her. She can’t be doing this, she isn’t an angry person, she needs to relax.

Wiping my mouth with the tissue “that took me by surprise” Chris finally spoke to me, he has been sat next to me all this time and hasn’t spoken a word, Rylee sat with Ti because they want to bitch about Imani, so I am with Chris and Raihan “what did?” looking over at him “just how you handled yourself with my daughter, just took me by surprise, it shows that like yeah. You the man in her life now” I chuckled “erm, I suppose. Just like yeah, she can be loud and sometimes she needs to pick her battles that is all” looking over at Robyn she is calling my name “I mean the real reason we called this was because we want to know what is happening in regards to the wedding” I knew that already “erm yeah, so. We did talk about it, I said that yeah you both can pay for it but we want it to be small. I don’t want to have all this drama of it, it’s our wedding and that’s how I want it to be, and if she doesn’t want certain people there then that is down to her” she won’t want Imani there “so Juke won’t be there” Imani piped up “don’t fucking speak to him” Rylee said “stop it” Ti said to her “so Juke won’t be there, you telling me the only fucking sibling you have won’t be there? He will be, and that sadistic bitch will agree to it but penalise me? I only showed what she wrote!” she shouted “maybe she has more love for me then you, what do you want me to say? Maybe Juke will be there, maybe not” I shrugged “if Juke goes then I do, so pick and choose. Rylee I am ready for you this time, so hit me” looking at Rylee “she won’t hit you, for what? You’re the one missing out, like we ok over here, I can promise you now if I start giving Juke money right now he will drop you so fast but I am going to let you suffer with him” shaking my head “we are happy thanks” I smiled at her sarcastically, she is a bitch “are you taking his name?” Robyn asked Rylee, raising an eyebrow “I am taking his name, but we both decided that I will have Fenty still” I jumped at Chris patting my back “you better look after my heart Oakley” I chuckled “that is fine, just makes things easier with a lot of things” Robyn said “Rylee Su, Chinese gang” Damson joked “bro” shaking my  head “it threw me off every time, like you got some Chinese ending to your name” Damson always starts “your name proceeds to get funnier” putting a finger up at him.

[salty-lemon-shark-from-the-sea]

Princess Pea x GN! Knight Reader

(Haven’t seen any fanfics for Princess Pea, so I thought I’d make one!) “Princess?” You ask knocking on the door. Savory smells floated through the air and the sounds of all the villager just outside the walls makes its way through the corridors.

“Come in,” a quiet voice calls from behind the door. Upon entering you were meet with the princess fixing her hair. “Ah (Y/n) there you are! Could you help lace up the back of my dress it seems to have loosen while father gave the speech,” she exclaims turning back to the mirror.

Walking over you take the lace and finish up the back not seeing the blushing princess. “Thank you,” she says turning to you. “Anytime m’lady,” you say bowing cause her to giggle. “Now are you ready for the banquet?” You ask holding out a hand.

“Of course,” Princess Pea replys happily grabbing your hand and pulling you out the door to the dinning room. Once there she lets go of your arm, so her father doesn’t see.

Heading to your spot next to the princess you stand strait with your helmet covering your face. Trumpets start to blow as the head chef walks out carrying a bowl. (I love how everyone gasp like they never seen soup)

Once he finally reaches the queen the head chef gives her a ladle full of the soup. “This is amazing,” the queen says grabbing a spoon. After that you kind of zone out staring at the princess till you hear a plop and some gasp.

“It moved,” the Queen remarks. “The soup moved,” “No no no no i-itz did not move,” the chef says. Just then a rat pops out with a mushroom on its head and wearing tiny cloths.

“GAH!” The Queen screams dropping her spoon. “Darling?” The King ask leaning over. “A rat! There’s a rat in my soup!” The Queen complains causing you to lean over to see the rat try to explain itself?

“Gah there’s a rat in my soup and I ate it! *dying bird noise*” just then the queen drops into her soup as the rat comes toward the princess. Grabbing the handle of your sword you ready yourself to attack.

“Its a rat!” The Princess shrieks. “Get me that rat!” The king commands causing you and the guards to chase after it. “Alright boys let’s go!” You yell chasing after it.

“Kitchen, he’s going for the kitchen!” The head chef yells running after the rat. “Stop that rat!” While you and other guards try to grab him.

“Get back here,” you mumble following it to the big soup pot. Knowing you should go look after the royal family you head back to the dinning room. Making a bee line for the Princess and the King.

“Sweetie, darling?” The King ask shaking he’s wife. “She’s, she’s, she’s, d-d-d-,” “Blimey she’s dead,” another guard says. “Get him!” He yells as the rest follow after the rat.

Not to far behind you see a guard throw a turnip at the rats head causing it to fall on the shot leading to the giant soup. The head chef just making it in time to move the shot out of the way lunching the rat on your foot.

Some guard then brings a malet down on it trying to hit the rat, but misses terribly. “Hit the rat you idiot not me!” You yell following the rat to a grater. “Oh we got you now,” you say. Trying to stab the rat, but it just ends up falling down the sewer.

Turning around you wack the guard who hit your foot. You and some other guards head back to the dining room. “Can’t believe the Queen is dead, and by a rat never the less,” one of the guard said.

“Yeah what way to go next thing you know soup will be banned!” The other one jokes. “Stop both of you,” you hiss whacking both of their heads. “What of the King or Princess heard you their clearly going to be morning,” you say walking in front.

“Yeah mate you could have hurt (Y/n)’s future wife’s feelings,” the guard jokes elbowing the other. Quickly turning on your heel you face both of the men. “Stop it! The princess and I can’t get married she’ll probably just marry some hot prince,” you say waving your hands.

“Just saying caption you have a chance,” the guard says walking past your hidden blushing face. “Whatever,” you mumble catching up to them as the dinning doors open.

Looking around you make “eye contact” with the Princess. It took every atom in both of your body’s not to run to each other. Walking over you place a hand on the King’s shoulder.

“Sir I know you love your wife, but please let us take the body to get ready to bury,” you say. “No no no no no,” was all the King could whisper. Turning to you commands for help they come over and pry the King away.

“Your highness I think it’s best if your go to your privet chambers,” one of them says help the King to stand. “She’s gone, she’s gone, she’s gone,” the King repeats walking out of the room.

Turning back no one was moving. “Alright people go home the banquet is over!” You shout startling everyone. “You two,” you point at two guards. “Take the body to the morgue and tell the guy to wait on the process,” you command waiting for them to move.

Yet no one was moving. “WELL WE DONT HAVE ALL DAY!!” You yell starting everyone into a scurry. Turning back to the Princess you see her being taken away by her maidens. “Caption?” a guard ask.

“What?” You ask. “Um the King wishes to speak with you,” the now shaking guard says. “Thank you,” you say dryly walking to the King’s chambers.

Knocking on the door you wait. “Come in,” a voice beckons you. “Your Highness you called for me,” you say entering. “What did you do with the body?” He ask facing the window.

“We sent it to the morgue sir,” answer looking to the ground. “Hmm alright, send a message to the mortician I want the funeral ready for tomorrow,” he commands.

“Yes sir is there anything else?” You question. “Yes, (Y/n),” he says turning to you. “You only job is to look after my daughter I don’t need to lose her too,” he orders eyes red from crying and throat dry. “Yes sir!” You say saluting before leaving.

“You boy!” You calling pointing to a servent. “Run to the morgue and tell the mortician to have the body ready by tomorrow for the funeral, and hurry,” you command heading to the Princess’s room.

“Princess Pea!” you call from the other side of the door. “May I come in your majesty?” you question. The door then opens causing you to move out of the way as all of the maidens walk past you giggling.

“(Y/n)?” her voice asks. God your name sounded so nice coming from her. “Yes your majesty it's me,” you say stepping through the door. “Oh (Y/n)!” she cries throwing herself on you. “Shh,” you whisper combing her hair.

“She’s gone and all cause of a rat,” the Princess cry. “Yes I know,“ you comfort leading her to the bed. Setting her done you sit next to her removing your helmet. Princess Pea looks over to you only then to quickly look away blushing, or to hide her tear-stained face.

“It’ll be alright,” you hug her. “What if it doesn't?” she asks looking up at you. “Then you'll always have this knight to save you,” you state proudly puffing up your chest and flexing. “*giggle* well with you as my night nothing could go wrong,” she says getting close to you.

“Captain (Y/n)!” “Princess Pea!” a guard and Maiden Louise call for you. “Princess you need to rest up after that and get ready for bed the funeral is tomorrow,” the maiden says walking to the closet.

“Captain you have to do portal for the night,” the guard says saluting. “Alright we'll then-,” “Will you be at the funeral?” the Princess asks grabbing your arm. “Yes, some higher-ranking guards and I will be on the side to mourn with you,” you say placing your helmet back on.

“Alright then see you tomorrow,” she says walking over to her Louise who was holding a more comfortable dress then the formal dress she was wearing. As the princess starts to undress you quickly walk away “What were you staring at?” the guard jokes poking your side as you leave.

“N-nothing,” you reply struggling to hide your stutter. Leaving you didn't notice a certain someone smiling after overhearing your conversation.

“Oh, your majesty what on earth are you smiling about?” Louise asks taken back by the smiling Princess after her mother died not too long ago. “Hmm oh nothing,” Pea quickly exclaims.

“I know what it is,” Louise says wiggling her eyebrows. “What?” the Princess ask slipping into the new dress. “Your in love this that caption (Y/n) are you not?” Louise ask.

“What?!” Pea ask almost dropping the dress. “I see the way you look at each other with love,” the maid pen say trying the back. Only Pea was wishing it was you doing that.

“Even if I did it I can't just marry the Caption (Y/n),” she states. “Why not? Their quite the catch I must say,” this causes the Princess to blush madly. “Suprised no one has ask them the question already,” the maiden thinks out loud.

Pea’s mind started to fill with thoughts of someone courting you. Cling to your arm. Kissign you. Living happily married while she marry some other prince who just wants to carry on the blood line.

“Your majesty are you okay?” Louise ask. Coming back to reality the Princess realizes how hard she was holding the comb. “I'm yes I'm fine just wish to be alone now,” she says standing up.

“As you wish your majesty,” Louise says moving out of the way. “Ring if you need anything,” she finishes walking out of the room. The princess then turns towards the window and sits on the chair. Waiting for tomorrow.

[thatbitch2828]

Chapter two!!!

a/n: Sorry it took a while, I got stuck a lot haha. Hope you guys like it, and don’t forget to leave feedback of you’d like! Love you!

You woke up slowly, groggy from sleep. You blinked and looked around, slowly remembering where you were and what had happened the night before. The concert, then the bar. You and Stacy… met someone? Yeah, two someones, and you went home with them.

:readmore:

Ugh. Drunk you had struck again. You would normally never just go home with a complete stranger, tipsy or not. But the combined euphoria from the concert and the alcohol must have overpowered your good sense. It did feel good to be wanted like that, though. It certainly hadn’t been bad sex. You grinned and felt the guy from last night, Chase, you remembered, sigh into your hair and shift his arm further around your waist. You chuckled at this and began carefully extracting yourself from his grip, careful not to wake him.

Your efforts were in vain, however, and you felt him pull you closer with a mumbled “good morning”

Time to put your (minimal) acting skills to work. “I need to get up.” you ‘pouted’.

“No, baby, you don’t have to, you can stay as long as you like.” he mumbled, kissing your neck.

“I do, though, I need to get Stacy home.” you chose to ignore the pet name.

“She’s fine, baby, she’s with Bret.” Chase insisted, still kissing your neck.

“No, we have stuff to do today, I have meetings for work.” you lied.

Chase finally just groaned and rolled over, allowing you to pull yourself out of the bed. You pulled on your clothes and went to find Stacy.

You crept from room to room, not wanting to disturb Chase and have to worm your way out again. You found Stacy curled up in what was presumably Bret’s bed, though the man in question was nowhere to be seen. “Stace, get up.” You said, unceremoniously whacking her with a pillow to wake her up.

“Uuuuggggghhhhhh” good, that means she’s awake.

You grabbed her arm and started dragging her out from underneath the covers. Half-asleep, Stacy pulled on the clothes you threw at her while you called an uber to take the two of you home.

“Stacy, you don’t want to break out just because you were too lazy to take off your makeup, do you?” you asked as you walked in the door to your shared apartment, fully aware of the panic this would induce.

“Shit! Do you think it’s too late to save my skin? You get in here too, I will not let my best friend suffer a skin-neglect crisis!”

Stacy was a skin-care nut if you’d ever seen one. She had countless face masks, scrubs, lotions, body butters, and a seemingly infinite supply of other skin-care products you didn’t even know the names or uses of. “With the alcohol and concert makeup, we’re gonna need a full, oil and water, dirt removing cleanse!” Stacy declared, digging through her bins to find the perfect products.

///

The two of you lay on the couch, hair and face masks ‘drawing out all impurities’ as Stacy had put it. You had taken it upon yourself to handle the hangover recovery side of things, popping an advil and chugging cup after cup of water, forcing Stacy to do the same. Speaking if Stacy, she was happily on her phone, probably watching skin-care tutorials, not that she needed it.

Your mind began to wander, your thoughts being drawn to your case and what you had said about it the previous night. What had made you say Harry Styles? Probably the fact that you had been coming down from a concert high from his concert, but something about the offhand remark didn’t sit right with you. You tried to shake the feeling, but it just wouldn’t quit. You remembered a brain exercise they had you do in the academy where you would try to connect the least likely suspect to get your thought process in gear and decided to go for it.

So, if Harry Styles were the killer…. The victims could be fans, that would explain the locations being clustered in cities but ultimately scattered across the country. Motive could be him wanting to find his soulmate, lots if people want to find theirs. Method variety would be him not wanting to be caught. Ugh. This was getting you nowhere. Harry Styles killing people? Ha! Just the thought of it was laughable. The exercise didn’t even help, you were just as stuck as you had been before. “Time’s up! Clean up time!” Stacy exclaimed, jerking you out if your little bubble of thought.

You peeled off the face mask and hopped in the shower to get the hair mask off and relax. The hot water ran down your body, soothing tense muscles and rinsing away the soap and any remaining dirt from the night before. You got out of the shower and wrapped your hair and body in your favorite big, fluffy towels, and made you way to your bedroom. Before you had a chance to pit on you gray cotton shorts and cami, Stacy busted into the room, squealing.

“Stacy, what the hell?!?” you said, glaring and trying to cover yourself.

“y/n, you won’t believe it!!!” Stacy screamed, completely ignoring your nakedness.

“What do you want Stace?” you asked, knowing it was probably a new skin-care product being released or something.

“I won! I can’t believe it! y/n, we’re going to meet Harry Styles! I won the weekend meet & greet!”

end if chapter two

a/n: I know this chapter wasn’t very exciting, but it had to happen for the plot to move along, hope you liked it!

[heirloommtomatoes]

had a dream with declan my best friend declan

[chubbology]

Inertia

prompt: a man gains weight trying to get his ex-girlfriend back, but goes way too far and gets addicted to gaining

He hadn’t gone to the gym even once in ages.

After a year of singlehood, he wasn’t ashamed to admit anymore that he’d only really gone in the first place to impress women. Ironic, of course, since his ex had never been more than vaguely dissatisfied about his gym habit.

When they first started dating, he had love handles he hated and his thighs had been too thick. He assumed she dated him despite these flaws. Only after he lost weight to please her did he find out that it was his chub that caught her eye. It was bigger guys she was into. It was a lot of miscommunication. A lot of insecurity on his part, since what her preferences meant was that she wanted him to be a little heavy, and he couldn’t possibly accept that with his society-ingrained doctrines about attractiveness.

But those doctrines meant fuck-all now; he was eating a double cheeseburger in his car, helping it down with an orange soda, thinking about dessert. He was wondering if she’d be proud of him now that he’d gained thirty pounds. He wondered if she’d look at him with half-lidded eyes like she used to, if he put on another thirty. Fifty. Whatever.

His phone buzzes. He sits up straighter, belly swelling a little into his lap. It’s her.

Hey. My friend needs to sell her two tickets. I know it’s your favorite band. Interested?

The next text was a link to an information page about an upcoming concert. He’d been so disconnected lately, he hadn’t even heard about it.

Even though he wasn’t actually all that interested, he replied that he was, and they set a date to meet up the next week. Shit. He looked down at himself. If she were someone else, she might be repelled. But she wasn’t someone else…

He was hit with a brilliant, maybe brilliantly stupid, idea. It’s execution began with going right back through the drive thru.

In the days leading up to seeing his ex again, he ate almost constantly. Since he was only doing freelance online at the moment, his work didn’t get in the way of this. He let himself eat whatever he wanted, in amounts three times what his body craved. He pushed himself to a state of being constantly past full. She liked fat guys? Fine. Even if she still didn’t want anything to do with him, he wanted her to see what he could have been, if he hadn’t been such a gym-rat douchebag. If he’d let himself become a lazy, docile boyfriend like she wanted instead, weak and overweight.

It was hard, gaining a lot of weight in a week. The number on the scale didn’t go up as much as he expected, even though he’d eaten enough calories to gain twenty pounds at least. He compensated by showing up to their meeting spot wearing clothes that tightly hugged his body, which now had a good forty-ish pounds of fat clinging to it. Looking in the mirror before he left, he’d almost seen what she was into. His ass had gotten kind of wide and dumpy, but in a sexy way?

He was all nerves when she showed up looking healthy and cute and indifferent about him, holding the tickets in her hands. Almost indifferent. She definitely gave him a once-over, when she thought he wasn’t looking. He could tell she bit the inside of her lip.

“Well,” she said, meeting his eyes fearlessly. Were her cheeks a little red, or was that wishful thinking? “I’ll see you.”

“Really?” he blurted. “Kinda miss hanging out.”

She smiled and turned to leave. “Maybe.”

He went home and binged hard.

*

In contrast to how he grew too slowly in the week before meeting up with her, in the weeks afterward, he gained weight doubletime. Fat rounded him out as easy as if he were a swiftly filling water balloon, engorging his thighs and belly and ass and hips wide and heavy. He ate compulsively as his appetite skyrocketed, as cravings crushed his will to restrain himself. His budget was thrown out of whack as he spent his savings on pantry loads of unhealthy food. His clothes stretched and seams snapped as he struggled to fit in his largest clothes. He shopped in the plus sized section first for comfort, then by necessity.

All the while he could only think: I wished she was watching.

He started imagining her with him. In the car as he ate fast food. At the store as he bought new clothes. Walking beside him as he forced himself to get exercise.

“Slow down, big guy.” “No, I think you need one size bigger.” “Sweating already? You’re so out of shape.”

Why did he like it? Imagining her mocking him? Teasing him? Eyeing his body, fleshy and overfed.

The next time she texted, it was late at night, and his eyes were glazed watching television, eating huge spoonfuls of that miracle drug called Nutella. His belly swelled out of his shirt. His breasts and face were puffy. According to the numbers he punched into Google, he had long crossed the threshold of obesity.

How was the concert?

He stared at the words. This was it. Maybe his only chance. He replied: Didn’t go after all. Been feeling off lately.

To his (very manly) delight, this prompted more questions, and it became clear she wanted a real conversation. Was she thinking of him? Missing him like he missed her? He thought out every response with the careful focus of a rocket scientist. He wasn’t going to mess this up.

He didn’t seem to, and they texted into the early hours of the morning, catching up. Finally, finally she asked to meet up with him again, and - feeling more eager, a little reckless - he tapped out a disclaimer. Or to her, hopefully: motivation.

Just so you aren’t shocked when you see me, I’ve put on weight since I bought those tickets from you. I’m not sensitive about it or anything, but it’s a lot. So here’s a fair warning.

He held his breath as he waited for her reply. Held his breath. Held it…

Oh. Really?

Like before, they set a time the following week. This time, to get coffee. No big deal.

He knew he had more than fulfilled his little scheme of putting on weight to catch her attention, and he could push the breaks now, but he felt helpless against his inertia. At this point, he’d cultivated half a dozen habits that had his weight steadily rising, and he couldn’t just turn them off. If he so much as thought of eating less, his whole body seized up in fearful anticipation and unhappiness, and he found himself cramming a couple moonpies into his mouth just to calm down.

He gained another six pounds between their text conversation and their coffee date. He felt so out of control, so out of shape, so out of line with the standards of popular society that he felt oddly…free. In a way, he felt free of anxious self-consciousness as he heaved himself out of his car and waved at her through the coffee shop window. She was sitting in a corner at a table for two. Despite his warning, she looked a little shocked.

When he sat down across from her, his huge ass hanging off the ends of the seat, she appeared to inhale deeply. Her expression was inscrutable.

“You weren’t kidding,” she said.

Blushing, he supposed he deserved a bit of tactlessness, for the tactless way he broke up with her. “What? Oh. Yeah, no. I wasn’t.”

She sipped her coffee, eyes flicking between his flabby chest and his flabby face. In a low tone that no one else would hear, she said, “What happened? For you to get fat as fuck.”

He opened his mouth and closed it. This wasn’t how he was expecting this to go. “Well. I’ve been working from home, stressed out. I let myself go and…” He trailed off when he realized her eyes were cold. No - so hot they seemed cold, like his shower water when turned to the highest setting.

“Is this because of me?” she asked, cutting to the chase. She crossed her legs, now openly surveying him. “Did you decide it was okay to gain a hundred pounds because you thought I’d be into it?”

He was speechless. He swallowed.

“Well? Do you want me back that badly? Ever since I saw you last time, all chubbed out, I’ve been thinking maybe I should give you a second chance.”

“Um.”

“But I don’t know…” She shrugged, but a smirk was hiding just behind that indifferent frown, and he wanted. He wanted her forgiveness, whatever that meant. “How about you gain a hundred more and we’ll go on a real date? Sound good? You’re not the only fat guy out there.”

She was full-on grinning now, and he missed her little games like this. He could play them, too.

“Maybe, but I bet I’m the only guy who’s gotten this fat for you,” he said. She was immediately affected by this, and he licked his lips. “You really want to wait to see me a hundred pounds bigger than this, or do you want to stick around to watch?”

Even quieter, she said, “You saying you like gaining weight? How convenient.”

So she still doubted him. He put out his hands for her to see. “Just look. Look at how fat my hands are. I can’t…” And finally his composure cracked a little. “I can’t stop. I couldn’t stop if I wanted. Even if you never talk to me again, I’m gonna gain weight.”

Any playfulness was gone now from her. She looked like she wanted him, too. “Hmm. Maybe we should go before you break that poor chair, huh?”

He blushed again. God, he was getting docile. “I’m not that bad,” he muttered. But she gave him a cruel grin. She hadn’t entirely forgiven him. “You will be.”

And he knew then: he was doomed. He was already a little bit into his own heaviness, and she was going to take that feeling and amplify it tenfold. She was going to enable every bad habit he had, watch him flounder under his increasing size and become weaker under layers and layers of fat until he could barely lift a two pound dumbbell.

He knew she wanted this to happen, and maybe he’d broken up with her before because he’d been afraid.

But he wasn’t anymore.

“Let’s go then,” he said.

*

Thank you to the reader who commissioned this work!

I'd love to write more. Check me out <3 etsy.com/shop/Chubbology

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

chained, m | myg

pairing(s): yoongi x reader

summary: You ever fuck someone wearing a collar and a chain... that's attached to the hot girl with the demonic grin? No? Just Min Yoongi? In his defense, he really likes a bad bitch.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; yup, there are Marilyn Manson and Slipknot references; D/s smut (fem reader, black leather collars and a chain leash, [a lot of] choking, saliva everywhere, handjob, m-receiving oral, slight edging, hair pulling, penetrative sex); non-idol!AU - rapper, sub!Yoongi x goth (also kinda his manager? lol) dom!reader; kinda PWP; Yoongi's POV

--

feel like I'm hexed, yeah, that bitch bad collar on her neck and her ass real fat

Most people would say, “Nah, dude, don’t mess with girls like that.”

Most people would say, “She’s fucking scary, why the hell would you think she’s hot?”

Most people would, but Min Yoongi wasn’t most people.

“I want to play a game.”

He tilted his head. “Then let’s play a game.”

She grinned, wild hair over her left eye. “Yeah?”

The first time he met her, he was at a bar and a woman was chatting him up, engaging him in conversation he didn’t want to be in. Fuck. The only reason he came was to accompany his friends, but they were all much more extroverted than he was and had already wandered off with potentials of the night. He didn’t want a potential. He just wanted a damn shot of whiskey and then he was going to slink into a corner and pretend nobody existed.

He minimized his responses to, “Mhm” and “Yeah,” but the woman wasn’t getting the hint and the bartender was busy. Sigh.

All of a sudden, a short man with a white, mannequin-like mask appeared. The white mask was painted with black streaks. He had stringy, long black and red hair and was wearing black coveralls.

Yoongi and the woman jumped away from each other, disconcerted by the appearance of the strange, tiny man.

“Bartender! Hey, real quick, can you get my friend here a drink?”

And then, fuck.

Black leather jacket, silver hardware. Tight fitted white top, so shredded the black bra underneath was visible. Short black pleated skirt. Ripped tights. Thick black boots with chains. Yoongi felt his eyes widen, looking up and down at this curvy frame. Wild hair, lush tits, juicy thighs, an ass that could put anyone in a trance with the way those hips swayed. Dark makeup, playful grin with red-stained lips.

A black choker with at least eight-centimeter spikes.

A pure white contact lens in her left eye.

“Hey, you can’t cover your face here,” a patron interrupted. “That’s creepy.”

The small man in the mask didn’t reply. The woman in black, however, swatted a hand like she was whacking away a fly.

“He’s part of the entertainment. Buzz off.”

“Oh, yes, you’re the band’s drummer, right?” The bartender rushed over. “Sorry, sorry. What will it be?”

The masked man said nothing.

“Double shot whiskey on the rocks,” the woman replied for him. “Did I get it right this time, Hana?”

A single nod from that stringy head.

“What about you?”

Yoongi jumped, startled the woman in black leather was addressing him. She cocked her head to the confused bartender. “You’ve been standing here ignored for the past ten minutes. I noticed because I was waiting for the guys to suit up to bring Hana to the bar.” She waved her hand. “Come on. Give me your order. I got you.”

“O… Oh. Same thing.”

She nodded. “Ya heard him. And don’t just only pay attention to cute girls, bartender.”

The bartender’s cheeks flushed. “A-Ah, I apologize! I’ll have them ready right away.”

The woman sighed and shook her head, completely ignoring the chatty woman who was making eyes at Yoongi, trying to get near him again. Yoongi pretended not to notice, stepping closer to the short, creepy man. The white mask didn’t move. The woman leaned down a bit because the man was shorter than she was with her height and platform boots.

“Don’t be takin’ nothing with the whiskey now. I’m treatin’ ya,” she chuckled under her breath.

Yoongi noticed the slight satoori. It made her voice a little deep and gruff.

“Shut it.”

She snickered. “Made you talk, Hana.”

The white mask went back to being silent.

She sighed and stood back up turning her attention to Yoongi. “Sorry about my friend here. He doesn’t like talking or people. I’m trying to get him to be more personable. Is it working?”

Yoongi blinked.

“Uh.”

Damn, every time she smiled, he felt a thrill shoot up his spine. White teeth showing, pink tongue peeking out between them.

It just seemed a little psychotic, a little mischievous, and a lot sexy.

“I know it’s not working. Can’t say I didn’t try.”

The masked man might as well have been a mannequin with how still he was.

“You’re his manager?” Yoongi found himself asking.

She shrugged. “Kind of? I actually just own the studio space the band records. But I like coming to the gigs sometimes if I can. Good excuse to get a little drunk, eh? Plus, I’m trying to find musicians to rent out the other spaces.”

Fuck.

Was it his lucky day or what?

“I’m looking for a studio space to record my music, actually.”

Her eyebrows raised. “No shit? You wanna talk some business?”

Oh, they talked business to bass and drums thundering the bar.

Later, they talked about some… other things too. What could he say? Yoongi liked a bad bitch. She wore leather, she owned cluster of studio spaces – “well, they ain’t mine, they’re my dad’s, but he’s never here, he’s off gambling and chasing booty, I think” – she gave him a fair price, and she loved to suck dick.

Yoongi didn’t find out about that last bit until later.

Right now, she was clipping the end of a silver chain to the collar around his neck.

It was heavy, probably metal. The collar he was wearing was thick black leather, with a steel ring resting against his collarbones. Yoongi was pretty sure she was doing a number on him. He wore a lot of black, yeah. He liked leather jackets too. But being around her presence was messing with his head and he was pretty sure he was being influenced by her energy. He used to hate his eye shape and his dark circles, but when he saw himself in the mirror with her tangled around him, riding his dick, he found himself thinking he didn’t look so bad after all. He looked good standing with the woman with the white contact lens and the demonic grin.

Maybe he was a little crazy, but everyone was a little crazy. Yoongi wasn’t worried about something like that.

Right now, she licked her teeth with that lithe, pink tongue of hers.

The other end of the chain was connected to the collar around her neck.

“You wanna play?” she drawled.

Fuck, he loved that shit. Her voice got slightly deep and throaty when she spoke in satoori. He wasn’t sure if she noticed it or not. It must be from her father. She mentioned that she had been raised by her dad – “sporadically, he liked to travel and, by travel, I mean gamble and chase ass, although surprisingly he didn’t come back with more kids, so I guess he learned his lesson” – but she was kind of the same way.

Not the gambling bit.

He didn’t really mind it though. She didn’t try to hide anything and he encouraged her to be herself. Plus, no one was getting the treatment he got. Yoongi was pretty sure about that, because when she fucked around, she did it in public. He had to be the one to tell her to take it upstairs and go for the throat.

Alright, not the throat. The dick.

In some way, Yoongi felt that was her way of asking if he approved, because she never took it upstairs and out of his sight unless he gave her the go ahead.

Right now, her tongue extended and wiggled in the air, glossy and slick with her saliva.

He smirked, open-mouthed and with a flick of tongue at the edge of his teeth.

She gripped the chain and yanked him by the neck to her face, crashing that demonic grin to his lips.

Like an injection or a spell, it gave him a rush, the firm leather snapping against his neck, chained to her, both wearing the collars, but she was always in control, always, and he liked it like that, liked the way she traced his lips with her powerful tongue, her saliva his aphrodisiac, before she captured his lips and rolled her body into his lap, skin to skin, moving like a snake, his gasp against her devouring mouth, her bare ass sliding on his thigh, fuck, so sexy, so soft, so bouncy, one hand on his face and another on his shoulder, fingers spread out and tendons flexing.

He liked to say she was the angel that held up her blinding halo with devil horns.

She yanked on the chain and Yoongi sucked in a breath, closing one eye as she licked his cheek, ending with a kiss on his brow. Cold air chilled his wet skin, making him shiver.

“God, you’re so fuckin’ hot, Yoongi.”

Pretty sure neither of them believed in a god but it got the point across.

He raised his hand and she smacked his wrist down, pinning it to the bed.

“Nuh uh.”

Yoongi wasn’t really expecting her to let him.

He raised his other hand. It was immediately swatted down onto the bed, her eyebrow cocking.

“Naughty, naughty.”

He cocked an eyebrow back, defying.

She leaned down and snatched the chain in her mouth, tugging on it with teeth and neck, narrowing her eyes. The white contact lens on her left eye gleamed under her lashes. She always wore it except right before sleeping. He once asked her why and she had shrugged.

“Mental security, I guess.”

Now, she growled like an animal.

“Down.”

She looked like she was about to headbutt him. He wouldn’t put it past her.

He lowered himself slowly, her mouth holding the chain taut until he was laying on the bed. She grinned, pleased at his obedience. Yoongi was quite sure that she was probably the closest being to a succubus that he would ever encounter with the violent thrill of arousal she was giving him with those plush lips and white teeth around the silver chain, pink tongue circling around the metal to tease him.

Maybe he was the crazy one for being turned on by it.

She dropped the chain on his chest. He flinched, the wet, heavy metal thudding onto his sternum, right against his pounding heartbeat. She rubbed her thigh against his balls and hardening cock, raising her head, chain following, higher, higher, letting go of his hands, arching her back, tits up, until it was fully taut between his neck and hers, the sides of the collars forcefully digging into his neck and hers. Yoongi did not lift his head from the bed to reduce the tension. Her devilish smile widened. A chain tug-of-war between collar to collar, both of them choking the other.

She lifted her hand and licked her palm, saturating it with saliva.

She reached down and wrapped her long fingers around his stiff length.

Didn’t say he could touch her though, so Yoongi didn’t.

“Think you can last longer than last time?”

He clenched his jaw. “Maybe.”

She pulled harder and he locked his neck and shoulders, clutching the sheets with a sharp gasp, pleasure shooting up his core, firm, strong strokes up and down his cock, fuck, fuck, every damn time, that second of cold as her saliva soaked his skin and then it warmed up fast to hot, slippery ecstasy, hard and getting harder, his pre-cum mixing with her saliva, staring at her hard nipples and juicy hips, knees around one of his thighs, shaking her ass when she noticed him looking, changing the pace, addicted to the feeling of her hands. He could feel the bones and the hard muscle of her grip and, sure, that didn’t sound sexy, but it felt incredible, adding stimulation in that inescapable hold and paired with slickness, choking his cock slightly and he craved every second of it, thighs tense and hard, growling in his throat as he dug his head into the mattress, pulling the chain for all it was worth, lightheaded now, the leather cutting in, probably leaving a mark, locking eyes with mischievous orbs and an impish smirk, the sides of her collar also cutting into the sides of her neck, choking herself as she was choking him while jacking him off.

Black haze threatened the edges of his vision.

He was going to pass out or cum. Yoongi didn’t care which happened first.

“F… Fuck!”

Yoongi snapped his jaw shut and shot up her forearm and down his length, strained groan of her name leaking past his teeth, bolts of pleasure invading his nerves all the way up to his scalp, blossoming into an erotic haze. She snapped her head forward. Oxygen flooded his brain, his jaw going slack with a moan, his eyes rolling back, high so high his whole body shuddered, barely registering her movement, hearing the lewd slurps of her drinking up his cum.

Wet.

Hot.

“Shit!”

Her mouth enveloped his twitching length, burying it deep into her throat, slathering tongue and satisfied hiss, chain clinking against his stomach and hitting his trembling balls, twisting her head so the chain wouldn’t cause any damage to them as she began to suck, flashes of tongue flickering out of the edges of those plush lips, grazing his crotch and scrotum, pointedly staring at him with an arched eyebrow.

She bounced her hips when she noticed him looking, shaking her ass as she sucked his dick.

Yoongi grinned.

His vision was barely focusing, trying to recover from orgasm in the midst of the intoxicating pleasure of her soft and tight mouth, tongue rubbing under the head of his cock, causing it to jerk and swell in the back of her throat and then she thrust it all the way back in there, taking him impossibly deep, sinfully moaning around his cock, vibrating it with lust. He glanced at her hands, fingers spread out and joints locked, tendons flexed, pointed black fingernails clawing into the sheets.

The heat flaring over his abdomen and hips was rising to his limit once more.

Yoongi panted her name, hoarse and breathless, realizing his Daegu satoori was suddenly more prominent in his disheveled state.

“I’m gonna cum–”

She popped her mouth off his cock and he snapped his teeth, snarling.

“You bitch.”

She grinned, wiggling her tongue, thick plops of saliva dripping down and hitting his flinching hips and throbbing cock, the head an angry purple-red from being so roughly stimulated after orgasm. The white contact gleamed alongside the devious glint in her right eye, black pupils blown out, a little psychotic, a little mischievous, and a lot sexy.

It didn’t matter who was on top because she knew she was always on top.

To be clear, Yoongi didn’t take shit from anyone without a fight. It got him in trouble sometimes, but this particular brand was trouble was the kind he liked. She gave him a long period of two seconds to roll the condom down before tangling one hand in the metal chain and the other in his black hair, pulling both in opposite directions. He hissed dangerously, plunging his hard cock into the wet, waiting heat, scorched by her roughness and his desire, one of her legs on his shoulder and the other around his waist, smacking their bodies together with violent force.

The tip of her tongue traced her teeth, grinning demonically.

“Come on, you said you were gonna play the game with me, Yoongi,” she chuckled, naughtily mocking him, voice deep and rough from her satoori.

“Let’s see if you can keep up,” he growled in kind, low and gravelly.

She pulled on the collar much harder than his hair, but both were equally arousing, prickling pain on his scalp and circulation cut short once again, brief flashes of oxygen bleeding through with his aggressive thrusts, the excess chain knocking against her collarbones, just another layer of sound along with slapping hips and squelching juices, her velvet walls clenching around him with every descent, not going fast so he could last, burying deep and hitting her hard. She winced, guttural growl at the base of her throat and the side of his lips quirked up.

“Too much?” he taunted.

“I’ll tell you when it’s too much,” she grunted, jerking her hips up and brutally squeezing the head deep inside.

“Fuck…”

He knew she wouldn’t let him do anything she didn’t want, so he kept going, her wrist flicking up with every thrust, leather collar snapping into his skin, thinning his breath to gasps at the stinging pain, the hand in his hair releasing him, messy black strands invading his vision, but he had no time to complain, groaning as her nails dug into his back and dragged up, inflamed hot lines that shot into his system and fed his adrenaline. His fists bunched the sheets, locking his shoulders, clenching his jaw, flexing his neck, and now he was being choked again, consistently this time, oxygen thinning out once more, barely able to keep his eyes open.

Her smile sent thrills up his spine and they split at the base of his head, tendrils of vicious desire numbing all sensations except lust, gluttonous for the pain that nourished more pleasure, greedy for everything she forced him to take, too prideful to ask her to loosen her hold, desperate not to give in to her wrath, usually slothful but now using every fiber of his strength to push himself to the limit, high getting higher knowing that anyone would be envious of how good he got it from that fiendish playful grin and hot delicious body under him, collared together in joined sin.

She let out a low moan, basking in him, feeding his need to satisfy hers.

“You’re so fuckin’ hot, Yoongi.”

He managed to get out half of a breath, staring into those irises, one real, one covered in white.

“Fuck, your voice gets me off every time,” he hissed.

He slammed his hips down and she clamped around his entire length, releasing the chain, both of their heads tipping back, his in the air and hers into the pillows, moans in unison as he shot into the condom and she released onto his twitching length and skin, coating him with slickness. The scent of sex permeated the air, his previous orgasm soaked into the sheets already and hers smearing with it as their hips descended, his throbbing cock pulsed by her flinching walls, her thighs tense around his waist and his hard ones against her ass, making sure to lean forward so he didn’t fall out, savoring every second of their joined bodies.

The hotel room was certainly getting some important use.

Yoongi remembered he had been annoyed when she said he should rent one since the potential gig was rather far away and transportation so late at night was going to be a bitch. He almost didn’t do it, but she rolled her eyes and booked it anyway, triumphant when he sold out the venue. Not a huge venue, but bigger than he had ever performed before.

He still said she had to make it up to him for making him travel farther than he originally wanted.

As usual, Yoongi was not disappointed.

“Housekeeping is gonna be pissed,” she chuckled. “Smells like sex.”

“I don’t give a shit.”

“How’s your throat?”

“Pretty sure rapping strains the inside of my throat, not the outside.”

She chuckled. “Now you hurt all over.”

“Good.”

Yoongi closed the distance and kissed that smirk, metal chain sandwiched between their hot, sweaty skin, the steel rings of the black leather collars clinking against each other.

--

masterpost

-

the lyrics in the beginning are from hot demon b!tches near u!! by CORPSE ft night lovell

[arrowflier]

Arrow write the mickey spotting ian and kev fic challenge!

Had to do this while it was still topical lol, so here goes.

The first time was an accident.  Well, sort of. 

"Ian can help with that," Mickey offered, watching Kev struggle to shift kegs and pour drinks at the same time.

"Thanks man," Kev grunted, hoisting another keg.  He waddled with it along the length of the bar, body hidden behind the counter, and set it down with a heavy thunk.

"Not easy though," he added as he straightened.  "Don't wanna make him strain somethin' before your wedding."

He waggled his eyebrows at Mickey, tongue stuck out, and Mickey rolled his eyes.

He knew exactly what would come next.

"You think I can't lift a keg?" Ian asked from the stool next him.  His voice almost broke on the last word with sheer disbelief.  "I'm not some skinny kid anymore, Kev, I just got out of prison for fuck's sake!"

"Cause there were plenty of kegs there to lift," Mickey muttered into his beer, and almost sent it splashing over the old stained countertop when Ian shoved his shoulder too hard.

"Just point me where you need me," Ian told Kev, puffing out his chest.

Kev eyed Ian, then Mickey, then Ian again.  But ultimately, he shrugged, and tapped the top of the keg he had just put down.

"Uh, this guy here needs to go out back," he said.  "Brought in the wrong one."

"On it," Ian said, and made his way to it.  He bent over at the waist, his hands reaching for the handles, ass stuck out in his too-tight jeans.

Mickey tilted his head, and sipped his drink, admiring the view.

"Whoa, whoa, not like that!" Kev said from behind the bar, arms out.  "You're gonna hurt yourself, man."

"Then how," Ian forced out between gritted teeth, still leaning over, "would you suggest I do this?"

Kev came around, whacked Ian in the back until he let go and straightened with a huff.  Then he took up position at another keg alongside the first.

"Lift with your legs, kid," he said, and dropped into a half squat right in front of Mickey's face.

Oh.

"Like this?" Ian relented, assuming position next to Kev, broad back stretched and straight over bent legs and strong thighs.

Oh.

Kev and Ian each hoisted their kegs, beginning their awkward walk away toward the back, and Mickey leaned so far back on his stool he almost fell off.

Well, he thought as he downed the last of his drink, eyes following two ridiculously built sets of shoulders strain their way across the room.

He could get used to seeing that.

---

The second time, it was definitely on purpose.  He had talked Ian into trying out KevFit after his own misadventure--he was not eager to keep working out on his own, but Ian kept wanting to do new shit together.

They were only one round in at the keg lift station, Ian already grunting and heaving and sweaty next to him, when Kev came by.

"Good form, Ian," he congratulated, clapping a hand on his shoulder hard enough to make him drop the half-filled keg with a clatter.  "Way better than last time."

"Gee, thanks," Ian answered dryly, wiping his forehead with the hem of his thin workout tank, and Mickey had an epiphany.

"Hey, Kev," he said slowly, like the idea was just occurring to him, "You got all this equipment rigged up, but how are you on basics?"

Kev's brow furrowed, his muscled arms going slack at his sides.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean like, pushups and jogging and shit," Mickey answered.  "You know, the kind of stuff they do in the military."

He let his eyes widen, and turned them on Ian. 

"Oh wait," he said, "that's kinda your thing, ain't it?"

Ian shrugged, looking confused.

"Uh, I guess?"

"Why don't you show Kev one of your old workouts?" Mickey suggested innocently.  "He could add some things to the whole KevFit routine, maybe bring in more clients."

Kev perked up at that.

"Yeah, why not?" he said.  "C'mon Ian, show me what you've got."

Five minutes later, Mickey was leaning against the "spring water" station, sipping from the flask he had snuck in from next door, watching two ridiculously tall, ridiculously strong fuckers take up half the open floor space doing increasingly impressive pushups.  Right then, Ian had one arm behind his sweat-slicked back, Kev mirroring his form, and Mickey's eyes followed the rise and fall of their bodies with total focus.

"Excuse me," a wimpy, hipster-sounding dude said hesitantly from behind him, " but do you know when they're bringing out more waters?"

Mickey didn't even bother to look.

"Get lost," he answered, waving a hand in the guy's general direction.  "Go drink outa the bathroom sink like a normal fucking person and let me watch my show."

---

The third time, he was pretty sure Ian was catching on.

Not that he cared, honestly--the view was fucking worth it.

"You call that a bench press?" He goaded his husband from behind the bench.  "Kev's kickin' your ass, man, that's just embarassing."

Ian glowered, breath hissing out between his teeth as he pushed up again.

"I'm pretty much pressing you right now," he gritted out, "so I'm feeling pretty good about it, actually."

Mickey hid his grin behind a hand, feigning disinterest even as his eyes followed Ian's bulging arms up and down, lingering on the tight plane of his chest.

"Well he's pressing like two of me," Mickey countered, letting his eyes wander, "so you might wanna step it up, tough guy."

Sure enough, Kev's current weights were at least half again what Ian had, and he was doing an admirable job of lifting them considering that his gigantic self was too big for the bench.  Mickey hadn't considered that when he invited Kev to check out the gym at their new place; it was designed for recreational exercise, not fucking seven foot tall body builders.  The man's legs stretched out awkwardly off the bottom of the bench, knees bent but stuck up far too high for proper form.  His broad shoulders dwarfed the other end, making it look like his upper body was just suspended there.

Mickey licked his lips, watching the shift of muscles under Kev's tanned skin--thank the lord the man shared his aversion to sleeves--and almost got chinned when he leaned too far over Ian's station.

The bar slotted into place without his help, Ian sitting up and wiping his face with a hand.

"Why don't you spot him for a while, then," Ian said. "While I go hit the shower."

He stood, making his way to the door, and Mickey paused, torn.

"Or I could give you a practical demonstration of my ability to lift you," Ian added over his shoulder, and Mickey was making his excuses to their guest and chasing after him before Kev could even finish another rep.

---

Ian never brought it up, after that, but Mickey still decided to cool it, just a little. Ian had seemed a little jealous, at the gym, although you'd never have known it by the things he said later--bet you like it when people look like they can throw you around, Mick--and Mickey did not need to throw a wrench into their marriage just for a little extra eye candy.

But then they were all at the pool together, the Gallaghers plus Mickey, plus Tami, plus Kev and Vee, and he really couldn't help it.

"Damn our men are hot," Tami had commented, sitting in a white plastic chair next to Mickey.

Mickey leaned back with a grin, taking a swig of lukewarm beer, and said, "You think that's hot?" nodding to where Ian and Lip were splashing each other over Franny's head in the shallow end.

"Watch this," he finished, and cupped a hand over his mouth to help his voice carry.

"Hey Ian," he shouted. "Bet Kev could beat you in a race."

"Hell yeah!" Kev called back from where he was manning the grill. "Name the time, man!"

Mickey could see Ian roll his eyes, and worried for the briefest of moments that his husband was done humoring him. But after a brief, hushed word with his brother, Ian was swimming to the side of the pool nearest Kev, saying "right now, backstroke, three laps," and Mickey was falling in love all over again.

"You do this a lot?" Tami asked, amused, as Kev stripped off his shirt and jumped in to take his place at the wall of the pool.

Mickey waited until they were off, arms wheeling wildly through the water and sending the sparkling spray onto sculpted, heaving chests, to answer.

"Define a lot," he said, not looking away from the spectacle as Ian and Kev hit the wall and turned, their swimsuits flashing through the water.

Tami snickered.

"Got it," she said, then, "thanks for sharing the wealth."

The race finished, Ian and Kev lifting themselves out of the pool, water running down their bodies as they clasped hands and went in for a shoulder-slapping bro hug. Ian looked back to where Mickey sat, and smirked.

"No problem," Mickey murmured, watching closely.

Ian leaned up to say something into Kev's ear, and Mickey squinted, like that would somehow help him hear it.

"Ogling the competition, Milkovich?" Lip's voice came from behind, and Mickey nearly fell out of his chair.

"The fuck are you talkin about?" he demanded, twisting around in his chair to look at Lip's knowing smirk.

"Nothing," Lip answered innocently. "Just noticed you've been watching Kev a lot lately."

Mickey scowled.

"And what's it to you?" he challenged. "Nothing at all," Lip said. "Just an observation." His grin widened. "And a distraction."

Mickey's eyes narrowed.

"A distraction from wha--argh!"

He cut off as he was lifted by two pairs of string arms, familiar ones wrapped under his own and different, strong hands holding his feet. He flailed, barely registering the flash of green eyes and a mostly bald head, before he hit the water with a splash.

By the time he surfaced, snorting chlorinated pool water out of his nose, it was to see two grinning faces looking down at him.

"Thought you might need to cool off after watching us," Ian said with a grin, laughing when Mickey tried to splash water into his face.

"Next time you want a show," Kev added, "just ask, man." He waggled his eyebrows. "I learned a few things when I worked that gay club."

Ian laughed again at Mickey's shocked expression.

"You need to work on your poker face, Mick," he said. "But it's okay, we don't mind."

He winked, then turned to walk away, leaving Mickey floating in the pool. Kev left with him, hips swaying slightly, and Mickey bit his lip and watched them go.

"Really?" Lip asked from the side of the pool, sounding disgusted, and Mickey just shrugged without looking back.

After all, if they didn't mind...

[topazy]

Inside, outside

Pairing: 10k x reader, Addy Carver sister!reader

Warnings: Blood, mentions of child death, swearing

Chapter: 1.01

It had been three years since the apocalypse started, three years since everyone's lives changed. Everyday was a fight for survival, and it never gets easier. As you wake up, all you can think about is the night prior, and the girl you’d given mercy to.

Charlotte. She was nice, far too kind for a world infested with the dead. She had gotten bitten while trying to kill a Z that was chasing a dog. The dog got away, but Charlotte wasn’t fast enough and got bit in the arm.

As you were getting ready for the day, Addy walked into your tent, giving you a bright smile. You knew by the look on her face she was up to something. "I know that look, where are you going?"

"To get more weapons. Want to come?" She asked.

"Sure."

Addy raised her brows, surprised. You usually turn down her offer. "Maybe we can find you another weapon."

You roll your eyes. A silent weapon was the smartest thing to use, but Mack had gotten it into Addy’s head that a bow and arrow wasn’t good enough. They both wanted you to have a gun. "I'm just going to pack my bag," you sighed, ignoring what she said. "I'll meet you outside, okay?"

Addy nodded as she made her way out of the tent, as you began to pack. You put in some spare clothes, a first aid kit, water and some snacks enough to last a couple of days if needed. When you were done, you walked towards the edge of camp to meet Addy and Mac.

"God, does she always need to bring so much stuff?"

You frowned hearing Mack’s comment. You fought the urge to cuss him out, knowing it would just cause another argument. Mack could be a right jackass at times. He always acted like he knew Addy better than you.

We walked in silence the rest of the way. Doc always waved when he spotted potential customers, but his smile always seemed genuine when he saw your sister.

"Got the goods for us, Doc?" You asked. "Anymore vodka?"

"Yup and some aspirin. You got what we talked about last time?" He asked, raising his eyebrows.

The older man smiled when you nodded. You rummaged around in your backpack, and pulled out a plastic bag containing fish you had caught a couple of days prior in a small stream nearby. The head cook in your camp let you use her freezer, on the conduction you gave half of whatever you caught to her. Looking pleased with the context, he handed you a small bottle of vodka and some pain killers.

"Good doing business with you," he pointed towards Addy, who was admiring some weapons. "Now, if you excuse me, I’m going barging with your sister."

"My favourite customer," Sketchy said, coming to stand beside you. He licked his lips, "see anything you like?" You scoffed and walked away, but he followed. "So Astra, I can get you another bottle for a fair price."

You scoffed, "yeah?"

"I’ll give you a second bottle, for one kiss."

"Enough," Mac said dryly.

You flipped Sketch off as he continued to laugh. "I’d rather kiss a Z."

Addy sniggered at your comment as she swung a spiked bat. Your eyes widened when a growling came behind you from the tree lines. A zombie came charging at Addy and just before it got her, she whacked it with a bat.

"You okay?" You heard Mack ask.

"Yeah just... it was fast."

You knew Addy was shaken even though she would deny it. You look down at the zombie’s body. "Shit, it's one of the Baker brothers."

"Awh no, did Z's get red? He was one of my best customers," Sketch moaned.

"Wonder if his brothers know?" Doc asked.

"I would say it's a safe bet because here they come." You said, aiming your bow and shooting the Z in the head.

Suddenly, another Z came charging at Mac who was caught off guard. He held it at bay with his arm. You ran towards him and stabbed the zombie in the side of the head with your blade before it had a chance to bite.

Doc’s eyes widened. "Well, it's closing time boys and girls."

Everyone quickly packed up their stuff and the new weapons they had gotten. Addy was recording what had happened on her video, while you took a few pictures with your Polaroid camera. You both thought it was important to record the events of the apocalypse for future generations.

You all silently started making your way back to camp blue sky, but froze when gunfire could be heard in the distance.

"Fuck! That’s coming from camp!" You yelled before running. Once you got closer, you were able to see the camp was destroyed.

"Doc, call Warren and Garnet, see what's going on," Addy said quietly.

Doc nodded, taking out his walkie. "Hello camp blue sky? Warren, Garnett, are you there?"

After a moment, a voice barely came through, "Doc? What's happening? We aren't at camp." Oh shit.

"It's bad guys, Z's everywhere! We think everyone might be dead," Doc sighed.

"Okay... coming... get you," Warren’s voice could be heard weakly through the radio.

You held onto Addy’s arm, pulling her back. "Guys, we need to go now."

You all started running through the forest to avoid the oncoming Z’s. A sigh of relief left your lips when you saw the school bus passing by. At least they got the kids out. But your relief didn't last long as a Z appeared at the back window before screams filled the air. The bus came to a screeching halt, and crashed into a tree.

The back door of the bus burst open and Z's came running straight for your group. Addy grabbed your hand, pulling you along as she ran in the opposite direction, through the trees. We ran up a small hill thinking they had lost, but stopped immediately when five Z's turned to face you. Before they could charge at the group, a truck came speeding towards them, and knocked the undead to the ground.

Garnett leaned out the window, "get in!"

You threw yourself into the back of the truck as Addy, Mac, and Doc followed quickly behind. As Warren sped off away from the Z's you slumped down in the back of the truck.

Camp blue sky was gone, your home was gone.

—

A hand landed on your leg, squeezing gently, causing you to look up at Addy, who gave you a small smile. "Are you okay, Astra? You’ve hardly spoken since... since we left."

You shrugged. Addy sighed but decided not to push you to talk. She knew that would only lead to an argument and no one needed that right now. So you decided to change the topic.

"Who do you think those guys are?" You asked quietly.

"Don't know, one looks like he’s with the military, the other I have no idea," Mac answered. "The other guy just looks shady."

It must be important if Warren and Garnet are listening to them," Addy replied.

Sighing, you turned your attention back to the scenery around you. It was changing fast. The green grass that covered miles of land was becoming deeper shades of red, the further away you got.

—

Warren pulled up outside an abandoned building that looked like it was once a school. It was most likely used as a shelter when the outbreak happened. On closer inspection, the place looked destroyed and deserted.

The man in the military uniform got out of the truck and started walking around scanning the area.

"See anything Hammond?" The other man yelled only to be ignored.

You frowned. Mac was right, the unnamed man did look shady.

"Yeah, it's them!" The military man shouted as he began firing at Z’s.

Warren, Garnet, and the other guy got out of the truck. They told you to stay behind as you stepped out. You nodded, and went to step back inside when the shady looking guy pushed past you, mumbling about needing to pee and stopping beside the truck.

"Dude seriously?" you were disgusted at the fact that he was just going to pee next to everyone. "Go around a corner, or something."

"Free country sweetheart man can piss where he wants."

You scowled at him as you turned to face Warren, "Can I just shoot him?"

"I'm afraid not," she smirked. "Murphy over there is important. We think."

Murphy. At least he had a name now.

Murphy opened his mouth to say something, but was quickly cut off.

"Hey you zip it up,” Hammond pointed to Murphy. "Garnet and Warren, check out the building. The rest of you check the cars for any dead or supplies."

You glanced at Doc, who just shrugged before getting out of the car. You were confused about why Garnet and Warren were taking orders from the military man.

The quiet sound of growling close by made your head snap up. Following the sound, you saw a small group of zombies trying to get something in a cage. You ran back to where Addy and Doc were.

"Guys, we got a bunch of Z's, around the corner. They are trying to claw at something desperately."

"What are they after?" Doc asked

"I’m not sure, but I could see the top of a cage."

You didn't need to say anything else as they quickly followed. As soon as they got there, you pulled out your blade and began to take the Z’s out. Once there were only a couple of them left, you noticed that there was a girl in the cage, but you couldn't tell if she was alive or not.

The girl in the cage looked up at Mac when he went to break the lock on the padlock by stepping into the cage. You had your bow aimed at the girl's head, just in case things turned sour fast.

"Be careful Mac," Addy whispered.

The girl suddenly jumped up, pushing Mac against the cage while holding a knife to his throat.

"Put it down!" You snapped, stepping closer so your arrow was only a few inches from her head.

"Please, please don't hurt him. We saved you!" Addy tried to reassure the girl. Your sister pushed your arm down so you’d lower your weapon, but you didn’t budge.

"Well, she definitely ain't dead," Doc laughed.

The girl glanced between your group. "Sorry, I forgot where I was."

"How long have you been in that cage?" The girls' eyes flickered at you before answering.

She paused before answering, "three days."

Mac slowly led the girl out of the cage, but you still had a tight grip on your bow, still did not trust her.

"It’s okay, Astra," Mac reassured you. "We’re good."

On the way to the building where Garnet and Warren were, you all walked in silence, on high alert for any Z’s nearby. Once you stepped inside the building, your eyes went wide as you saw Garnet holding a baby. Oh my god.

"Holy shit," Warren muttered, walking towards him. "It's been years since I've seen a baby," she said, stroking the baby's cheek.

Warren made it clear she didn’t want to hold the baby, so Garnet turned to face you with a pleading look. "No, absolutely not."

"I’ve seen you take down Z’s without flinching. Don’t tell me you're scared of holding a baby."

You pouted, but before you could reply, Murphy cut in. "Yeah, that's great. Maybe she can shut it up before it attracts Z's.”

You glared at Murphy while taking the baby from Garnet. "Shut up Murphy, it's just a baby.”

Before an argument could break out, Hammond addressed the girl who still hadn’t shared her name. "What were you doing in that cage?"

"I was protecting myself from Z's.”

“Well, it looks to me like someone put you in there. I'm just a little curious as to why everyone else is dead but you." It was clear in his voice that Hammond wasn’t buying her story.

Frowning, she continued to explain what happened. "They showed up with supplies, word about food travels fast and they had too many people to die with. They started shooting some of the locals and that brought on the Z's!"

"Great!" Murphy exclaimed, "Let's leave the baby with her and leave."

"Fuck no! I’m not trusting her with a baby," you felt your face redden slightly. "No offence, but I don't know you. Hell, I don’t even know your name."

The girl just nodded, "I’m Cassandra."

"Fine, we'll take her and the baby to the next outpost," Murphy huffed like a child.

"Puppies and kittens are on the way!" Warren yelled.

They all shot up getting ready for the threat, but were stopped by Hammond. "Garnet stayed here with the baby and Murphy. The rest of you should go and load the car with supplies. Me and Warren are gonna see if we can start that piece of junk out there."

"Wait, we need to talk about this," Mac demanded.

"No we don't, go!" He snapped.

We all looked at Garnet, who nodded his head, telling you to just do what the man said. You may not have trusted Hammond, but you trusted Garnet.

While checking the dead for anything useful they might have on them, you jump at the sound of a shot being fired. You quickly grabbed your bow and arrow and aimed in the direction the gunshot came from. You lowered your weapon slowly. When you made eye contact with a boy who looked to be the same age as you. He’d killed a Z that was coming up behind you.

You opened your mouth to ask where he had come from, but hearing an argument, you began to run to where it was coming from.

"My mission is to get Murphy to California! He is the only chance at a cure we have. I'm not going in there!" Hammond yelled.

Is Murphy the cure? That didn’t seem right.

"Fine! I'll do it, but if I don't come back, you have to get him to that lab." Hammond said before making his way into the building.

"Wait, where's the baby?" You questioned

"Turned into a Z," Garnet said quietly.

"Oh," you sighed while looking down at the ground.

A silence fell over the group, until Doc broke it by making a stupid suggestion about leaving the others behind. You weren’t paying attention as you scanned the area for the boy that saved you.

"Most Z’s don’t come from the sky," Addy said, leaning into you.

"I was looking for... someone," you mumbled.

The sounds of rapid gunfire and screams caused Warren to open the door and slowly enter as everyone else looked on in curiosity. Suddenly, the Z baby was making its way towards your group. You placed a hand over your mouth to stop yourself from screaming. This had to have been the worst thing you’d seen since the apocalypse started.

You slowly made your way into the room, and Warren began firing. Hammond was lying dead on the floor. His face had been eaten by Z’s. Swallowing down, you pulled your blade and gave him mercy before you went back outside.

Warren squeezed your shoulder, as she came up behind you, "You did good kid." She turned to face the rest of the group. "We need a plan."

"My plan is to take this truck, forget about California labs and all of you! I wanted off this train from day one!" Murphy shouted

Doc stood up. "Now hold on, what about the vaccine?"

"He's right. What if this is real?" Addy added. “What if it works? What if it's you Murphy?"

"Or what if it's a bunch of bullshit?" Mac scoffed.

"Whatever we do, we can’t stay here. All this noise will attract unwanted attention," you pointed out.

Before anyone could say anything else, the sound of a radio crackling got everyone's attention. You all searched trying to find where the noise was coming from. Addy ran back into the building where Hammonds' body was, coming out seconds later with a handheld radio. You all ran towards Addy to hear better.

"Operation BiteMark, this is citizen Z. Do you copy?" A male voice said.

"Hello, who is this?" Addy asked.

"This is citizen Z. Who am I speaking too?"

She looked up at you with wide eyes, "Addison Carver."

"Addison? Is the package safe?" Addy and you exchanged a confused look.

"Package?" You asked, "Does he mean Murphy?"

Addy answered him. "What are you talking about? What package?"

"Listen... talk to Hammond," the crackled voice said.

Addy sucked in a deep breath. "Sorry, he's dead, it just happened."

"What? No!" The man yelled, "I need to talk to someone in charge!"

Addy handed the radio to Garnet, who looked confused. "He wants to talk to someone in charge."

Reluctantly, he accepted the radio. "Hello, this is Sargent Garnet from the national guard."

"Sargent, listen..." you let out a sigh of distraction as the radio began cracking again. "You... Murphy... California..."

Garnet was yelling at citizen Z that he wanted more information, before the radio died. He was in a fit of rage. Garnet threw the radio onto the ground, smashing it.

Damn it. It looked like you’d need to take Murphy to the lab.

"Alright, we'll take the cars that we managed to get working." Warren said while standing up. "Load up all the supplies, we're going to California."

When the truck was loaded with the small bundle of supplies you’d found, you jumped into the back of the truck.

When Doc slowed down, you stood up to see the boy who saved you. "Hey, you're the kid that saved my ass," he laughed as the boy just shrugged. "Well, can I give you a lift?"

The boy seemed to think about it for a moment before shrugging, "sure."

The boy spotted you before hopping into the back of the truck to stand next to you. You banged on the roof, and Doc began driving again.

After moments of silence, you turned to the stranger that saved you, and smiled. "Hey sniper boy, I'm Astra. Thanks for saving me."

"10K."

[lonely-lost-soul]

Under the Floorboards (Pt. VII)

(Technoblade X Reader) Pt. I, Pt. II, Pt. III, Pt. IIII, Pt. V, Pt. VI, Pt. VII

     Your eyes cracked open as soon as the sunlight spilled into the room, your eyebrows furrowed together and a hiss of pain spilled from your lips. You brought your arm in front of your face to block out the sun, Technoblade should've closed the curtains the asshole. As you pulled your hand away from your face you couldn't help but pause, a delicate golden band with a blue diamond sat on your ring finger. You sat up in surprise, immediately buckling in on yourself pain radiating through your abdomen. You licked your cracked lips before uttering a simple,

     "Ah fuck."

Something stirred next to the bedside, you turned your head in the direction of the sound, Technoblade was draped over the side of the bed. His hair was a rat's nest, sticking up at odd angles and ends, frizzing out in all directions. Drool was stuck to the bottom of his chin, his hands gripped the sheets tightly, his eyes screwed shut. He looked upset like he was having a bad dream. Looking around the room briefly, you noticed his robe and crown were hung up in the closet, food was left half-eaten on the vanity. How long had you been out? Trying to make as little noise as possible you slowly peered out the window, outside you saw a little shack built into the mountain. You must've been out a while if Technoblade is letting someone ruin his real estate value like that. Blinking in surprise you saw Ranboo emerge from underneath a hole, a smile spread across your lips as he paused and looked up at the window. You gave a small wave, his mouth appeared and his jaw dropped, he began to wave back enthusiastically before charging through the snow towards your home in a sprint. You knew you only had a few moments before the lanky boy burst up into the room, you carded your fingers softly through Technoblade's hair, you've never seen him in such a dead sleep. Normally, your stirring and movements would've woken him up minutes ago. Maybe Phil give him something to knock him out? That's a very likely answer.

     "Bubba's..." You cooed tenderly kissing his forehead, "Time to wake up." You felt him shift, his face scrunching up uncomfortably as his eyes blinked open. Dark bags were prominent as he grumbled in displeasure until his eyes focused completely on you, he sat up swiftly and grabbed your face. "Ow, gentler please."

    "You're awake." His voice quivered as he began stroking your face and cheeks, "You're actually okay." You tilted your head to the side in concern, his usual stern eyes filling with tears, "I thought you were dead." Technoblade held you close burying his face into your chest, his nails digging into your back. All you did was rub his shoulders and let him hold you like you were porcelain glass. "You were out for a week, Phil helped me tend to your wounds." He said after a few moments of silence, "NEVER do that to me again."

    "I can't make any promises but I don't plan on it." You smiled as he pulled away from you, his eyes still red from reluctant tears. Techno leaned forward to press a passionate kiss to your lips, his hands cupped your cheeks as he kissed you like it was his last moments with you. You saw fireworks erupt in your vision and you visibly melted into it, pressure you didn't know you had was suddenly lifted off your shoulders.

     "Oh my god. I'm-I'm sorry." Ranboo sputtered, throwing open the door and tossing his hands over his eyes frantically. Techno practically threw you across the room, the only thing keeping you from falling over was his tail that had wrapped around your waist during your kissing session. His entire face was bright red,

    "Kid what the heck." He groaned, "Knock please."

     "Sorry I was just excited, I saw she was awake from the window." Ranboo rubbed the back of his neck, as he looked at the two of you.

     "Aw, were you worried about me?" A smile came across your face as the boy blushed furiously under your gaze, one cheek was bright red and the other was a bright green just like his eyes. He hesitantly bobbed his head in a nod and a soft, motherly look spread across your face. Technoblade saw the look you gave the teenager of the corner of his eye and his heart turned to mush in a matter of seconds, these kids were gonna be the death of you. "I'm sorry to have worried you, but look I'm a-ok now!" A smile spread across Ranboo's lips as he walked further into the room,

     "Well, that's a relief." He sat cross-legged on the floor smiling up at both of you, Technoblade sighed and ruffled his hair. His eyes widened looking up at the blade, little stars seemed to dance in his heterochromatic orbs.

    "Thanks for looking out for her. I'm sure Phil told you but you saved her life, I owe you one. I don't take that lightly." Technoblade nodded at him with a serious look on his features as he took his hand off of Ranboo's head. Ranboo looked shell shocked at the genuine honesty of your boyfriend, "Now never mention this to anybody or I'll kill you." The look of awe on his face fell immediately and it turned into a sheepish smile, his shoulders slumping forward.

    "There it is," Ranboo sighed. You couldn't help but let out a joyous laugh at the interaction, both men turned to look at you and grinned at one another, they were both happy to see you laughing.

    "So when did you move in with us?" You asked Ranboo with a hum gently stroking the top of Technoblades head once again. He had to bite his lip to keep from letting out a happy sigh, he hadn't felt your hand in his hair in so long could you really blame him? Ranboo looked thoughtful for a moment his eyebrows furrowing, he rubbed his claws together like he was searching for the answer.

    "Sorry I- oh! The day after you all blew up L'manberg again Phil came to me and asked if I had a place to stay. I obviously didn't have a place to stay anymore." He gave an awkward laugh, "So here I am."

     "Well, we are certainly happy to have you with us. Right Techno?"

    "Ehhh," You glared at him sharply and he held up his hands. "He's gotta prove himself first Princess you can't blame me for being on edge."

    "Eh, that's fair. Still, I'm just happy to be here." Ranboo beamed brightly unfazed by Technoblade's hesitance, something told him that Technoblade really didn't mind him living on his property. "Oh, I'll contact Phil and let him know you're alright! He'll probably want to know about your condition, yeah that's what I'll do."

Reaching out you took Ranboo's hand as he went to stand, he looked a little surprised as he stared at you. "You ever need anything, please don't hesitate to talk to me, I know that what happened was traumatizing. So please, I'm here for you if you need me." His ears seemed to press back against his head, his eyes widened considerably.

     "Thank you." He practically yelled pulling away from you to scurry out the door, he was completely and utterly flustered by your kind words. It reminded you so much of Technoblade when you first met him you couldn't help but smirk at him. He raised an eyebrow at you a frown gracing his features,

    "What?"

     "He acts exactly like you. He's going to fit in great here." Technoblalde looked at you like you had three heads,

     "Ya know, I can't believe I ever missed hearing your voice."

    "Oh fuck you." You gently cupped his chin and kissed the corner of his mouth, "I loved and missed you too you big lug." Technoblade closed his eyes and smiled adoringly at your gentle caresses, "So..." You whispered softly in his ear, "what's with the ring?" He tensed in your hold and you felt his forehead hit your shoulder.

    "An...an engagement ring." He admitted quietly, your eyes lit up and a smile spread across your lips. You hummed in response and began to pet his hair soothingly,

    "I thought a certain pig said that we'd only get married if I didn't get hurt."

     "Yeah well whoever that was sounds super cringe. Imagine basing a marriage on something like that. Men am I right?" It got a giggle out of you and he pulled away to flash you a smile, his large hand cupped your cheek and you snuggled into it.

You nodded your head, "Can't live with them clearly. Since all they do is lie." Technoblade nodded with a straight face, "but in all seriousness this for real? Cause like I'm totally gonna make out with you if it is."

     "Oh, it's super for real then."

    "Stop I'm being serious!" You whacked him lightly in the chest,

     "It's for real," His face lost its teasing smirk as you both locked eyes. "I'm head over heels for you (Y/N). You make me so happy, you're the only one in my life who makes me feel...feel normal," You watched his eyebrows furrow, "I knew I loved you and I knew that you were it for me." Technoblade sighed and leaned back picking up your hand and interlocking it with his own. You couldn't help but notice the golden band on his left hand, it mirrored your feminine ring perfectly. "When you were dying, or when I thought you were dying all I could think about was that we never got married. That we couldn't blow more governments up together or go on adventures. So yes, it's for real, I want to marry you officially if you want a small wedding we can do that if you don't want a wedding at all I don't care. I just wanna be yours forever."

Your heart fluttered in your chest and butterflies flew around in your stomach. As brutally honest as he always was he was more than a little emotionally stunted, you knew this was hard for him. You leaned forward and kissed him, it was long and passionate, you felt his fingers curl around your hair. As you pulled away you felt him try to chase your lips with a frustrated whine,

    "I wanna be yours forever Techno. You're everything I ever wanted in life, I've never been happier than when I'm by your side. All my life I've been a wanderer, going from place to place, never really having a home. You gave me the one thing no one has and it's exactly that, a home. Plus, you're so feral which is so hot." You added just to watch his face scrunch up and you felt him push you down against the pillows.

    "You ruined the moment. I changed my mind, the wedding is off." He huffed with no real feeling behind the words, "you should rest."

    "I've been resting. Help me get up I wanna go outside." You scoffed with an eye roll swinging your legs over the side of the bed. You noticed your ankle was wrapped in a tight bandage, you frowned wincing as you tried to put pressure on it. "Fuck, how long am I going to have to wear this?"

     "At least a month is what Phil said, we need to make sure there is no lingering damage. Can't have my anarchist wife not be able to cause trouble with me."

     "Oh? I'm still allowed to cause trouble with you?"

     "Obviously. Especially since I'm getting you a totem of undying just to cover all my bases." Technoblade stood up helping you to your feet, "you're doing great Princess, let's see if we can make it out front." You gave him a tentative smile as the both of you slowly made your way down the ladders and outside. You never thought you'd miss the cold winter weather stinging your cheeks but here you were. "Cold?"

    "Only a little." You smiled up at him and felt his cloak drape around your shoulders, he must've grabbed it before you left the room. You buried your face into the pure white fluff at the top and closed your eyes, it smelled like Technoblade and that brought you comfort. He usually smelled like gunpowder, shampoo, and cedarwood, it was by far your favorite smell. Technoblade's hand wrapped around your waist and pulled you flush against him. The both of you just stood there enjoying the flurries of snow as they fell down around you, his thumb gently brushing against your hip bone.

After a while of peaceful silence, Technoblade seemed to grow restless his gentle brushing turned into inconsistent taping, eventually, he pulled you in front of him only to begin to sway with you in your arms. "You getting bored?" You looked up at him and reached to cup his cheek in your hand, he hummed pleasantly at the contact.

     "A little."

     "Aw, my poor baby," You cooed and he grumbled under his breath at the sarcastic tone your voice took. "Kidding, don't get pouty I'm messing with you, if you want I can read to you? Or do your hair cause it's...a mess."

     "You mean you aren't head over heels in love with this unwashed rat's nest?"

     "Unwashed." Your nose scrunched you and he smirked wickedly, "I know that look. Don't you fucking dare-" You let out a shriek as Technoblade began to rub his head against your cheek, making his hair fall over your shoulders. "TECHNO! TECHNOBLADE YOU ASSHOLE STOP IT RIGHT NOW!"

     "What? I'm being loveable and soft. Is this not what you want?" He purred holding you tighter against him as you wiggled in his arms trying to break free of his vice-like grip.

You growled at him, "NO! You dick!" Technoblade could only snicker at your dismay but pulled away from you per your request.

    "I'll go shower," He pulled away to scratch at his head "want me to set you up by the fireplace? I'll meet you there when you're done?"

    "As long as you shower I'll do whatever," You huffed and he snickered picking you up to carry you inside the house. "Stinky pigman," His face shifted into the said creature and he poked you with his nose. You rolled your eyes as he sat you down on a chair, reaching up you scratched his snout, he made a dulcet sound before pecking the side of your head. The fire popped and crackled as the heat warmed your frozen cheeks. Snowflakes melted in your hair making you shiver from the brief chill they let off, closing your eyes you took in a deep breath of air.

Married, you couldn't believe you were actually getting married...to the man of your dreams no less. You held up your hand in front of you and traced the delicate details on the band, you felt at peace, this wedding needed to happen as soon as possible. You barely wanted to waste any more time, god knows what could happen in the next coming months, who was going to come and try to kill the both of you again. You'd have to mention it to Technoblade when he came back to see if he was okay with basically eloping. You stretched like a cat snuggling into the cushions, you'd have to get a dress though because you're not showing up to your own wedding in Netherite armor. Floorboards creaked above your head signaling Technoblade was out of the shower and getting ready to come to greet you downstairs.

You turned away from the sound, your lips pressing into a thin line as you let out a shaky breath. Tommy had been discovered under the floorboards of this very house after the rough start you had bonded with the rambunctious teen and wanted to keep him safe. Obviously, everyone knew how that ended, a part of you hoped you weren't projecting that lost care onto Ranboo. It wouldn't be fair to Ranboo if you treated him like another Tommy, the child you wish you could've helped.

Twirling your fingers around your (h/c) hair you only delve deeper into those thoughts. You wanted to help Ranboo, you wanted to help all the kids, the trauma they all have gone through had to be tremendous. Ranboo living on the property was a start, away from the crater of a failed country and anyone who would want to hurt him. You were going to protect him, this wasn't going to end up like Tommy's betrayal, you'd make sure of it.

TINK

Technoblade would probably call you insane if you mentioned this plan to him, but then again he was never one to feel pity or sympathy for those he didn't consider family. Even so, you hoped this boy would open up to you and consider you a parental figure in his life. Hopefully, Technobalde would warm up to him as well, you both all could be a little family.

TINK

Okay...maybe that was jumping the gun. You barely know him, for all you know he could secretly be helping Dream as a double agent or something. Okay, (Y/N) now you ARE being insane that's absurd.

TINK, TINK

What the FUCK was that sound. You turned to the window and could only make out a little smiley face in the corner of the glass, for some reason unease settled in your stomach. Where did that come from?

    "Princess?" His sonorous voice filled the room crashing over you like a wave of clarity amongst the ever-growing fog of your mind.

You jolted in your seat before turning towards your fiance, "Hi bubbas."

    "Hallo," Technoblade was shirtless his scars on full display as well as his muscles. One was way more important than the other to you, you can guess which one. His pajama pants sat loosely on his hips as he wandered over to sit in front of you, his head resting between your thighs. You had to hold back a giggle at the pleased look on his features, his hands came up, giving them a soft squeeze.

     "You having fun?"

Yes. OBVIOUSLY. You could crush our head with those thighs, so yes. So soft. We need to stay here forever.

     "They're okay," He replied casually as your fingers carded through his pink hair. "I definitely don't want you to try crushing a watermelon."

     "Oh my god." Your shoulders began to shake and you placed your forehead on top of his own, he only smiled softly. Your laughter was sweet and made him think of a small little bell chiming in the air.

     "You're gonna braid my hair now right?"

     "Obviously."

    "Thank you, Princess."

You were a little taken aback by his genuine tone, there was no hint of sarcasm or his usual teasing voice.

You love him more than all the stars in the sky.

He looked up at you with his big red eyes, as you began massaging his scalp. He let out a throaty moan, his eyes fluttering closed at the feeling of your blunt nails on his scalp. "Jesus Princess, you're a goddess."

     "As long as you never say I rival Aphrodite you can call me a goddess all you want." He laughed and nodded his head,

     "You have yourself a deal."

     "I can't wait to marry you as soon as possible."

     "You're really obsessed with me huh? You a fangirl? That's a little creepy not gonna lie."

     "Oh, I'm your BIGGEST fan. I live in your house and sleep in your bed."

    "Cringe," You rolled your eyes dramatically but pecked his lips stroking his cheek with your thumb.

    "Seriously though, can it happen as soon as we can."

    "How do three days from now sound? Just so we can plan properly and gather some things we need- if you want a like actually wedding." You nodded eagerly,

     "Yes, please. That's all I need."

    "Then it's settled."

The smile on your face was all he needed to know he made the right decision not only in marrying you but rushing the wedding,...three days. Oh shit, he was gonna be a husband in three days. The voices in his head collective said one phrase,

We're fucked.

~~~

Hi guys! Thanks for all the love for my story! Have fun with this chapter, a Karlnapity x reader might be in the works next. Not that this story is over, after all there’s still a wedding to attend. 

ALSO please go read my friend quackity-love-bot’s new fic! Here’s the link: https://quackity-love-bot.tumblr.com/post/642241693382557696/skyfall

Enjoy ;)

[kiliinstinct]

nalu for nr 14 if you’re still doing it?👀❤️❤️

Old Touch Prompts That I'm Not Accepting Anymore - (sorry for the Delay!) 14: Putting An Arm Around The Other's Waist

---

He wasn't taking no for an answer.

Natsu knew and understood more things than people gave him credit for. Allowing Lucy her space while knowing she was more than capable of handling herself was one of them. It wasn't the first time some stranger saw her and decided to strike up conversation. It certainly wouldn't be the last. Unease still boiled in his gut, jaw tense as he ground his teeth together. Once upon a time, he'd subtly chase any would-be suitor off with a careful glare, or a burst of heat that burned the soles of his shoes, but no- Lucy had made her it clear he was not to do that. Not anymore. While the temptation sizzled beneath the Slayer's fingertips, Natsu held back, eyes gazing sharply upon the scene instead. Lucy didn't need him. Not for this, at least.

".. so, are you doing anything tomorrow?"

"I've got a job planned out with my team, why?"

That didn't mean he couldn't eavesdrop right? It's not as if he could shut his ears off and they HAD been out in the market together. He'd just left for a few minutes to grab something Lucy had been eyeing a few minutes ago! It was okay to listen in, right? Natsu wasn't sure how to handle this. Interrupt?. Walk up as if he hadn't been listening in and ask who her new friend was? Introduce himself as her partner? Argh, he was too new at this!

"Oh," the guy was obviously disappointed, but rallied a second later, voice full of hope and something Natsu couldn't name, but he didn't like the lower octave his tone took, "Well, maybe you could postpone? Or, you know, perhaps we could take time to get to know each other tonight instead?"

Natsu was just about to break through his self-imposed silence when Lucy held a hand up, voice firm, "Yeah, that's not going to work. I've got plans tonight AND tomorrow."

"What plans?" The guy balked, "Don't tell me you're seeing someone else?!"

Natsu could hear the annoyance in her voice as she blew a tuft of hair from her face, "Whether I'm seeing someone or not is none of your business. I said I'm busy. That should be more than enough, buddy."

If someone had poured Cement in Natsu's shoes, that still would have done nothing to contain his fury. The man scoffed at Lucy's words, moving to place an arm over her shoulder and Natsu hissed under his breath, advancing through the crowd at a much quicker pace now. Screw waiting for Lucy to chase him off, this guy was a prick!

"Come on, you're alone right now, at least give me a chance and have coffee -" The sound of Lucy's slap rang out through the market. Or perhaps that was just Natsu's good hearing. Still, the guy froze in place, face throbbing a brilliant red as she angrily stepped back from him and snarled, "I said BACK OFF!"

The entire market was watching now and Natsu finally felt the tension leave his shoulders as the man finally realized just what he was the center of. He shrugged, muttered a swear beneath his breath that most couldn't hear and stomped off through the crowd, nursing his stinging cheek as he went. Lucy released a breath she'd been holding and readjusted the bag of groceries she'd held on her hip and also began to mutter.

Natsu caught the words with ease, but chose to ignore them, focusing only on the words that mentioned his. "It's been thirty minutes, how much longer is he going to take? He's so lucky these don't need to be refrigerated!"

Now he was needed and Natsu took up the invite with ease, finally reaching her through the crowd as he held a hand up in greeting. "Yo! I made it back, Lucy!"

The speed in which she spun almost whacked her pony tail into his face, but Natsu didn't mind, grinning all the while. "There you are! Geez, if you were going to take that long, you could have just had me go back with you, Natsu. Waiting was starting to get really awkward-"

She paused, obviously catching something Natsu didn't realize he was broadcasting. "Your steaming... you saw what happened, didn't you?"

Oh, yeah- he forgot about his body heat. Oops. Grumbling sheepishly, Natsu focused on lowering the temperature of his own body and shrugged, one arm swiftly moving to wrap around Lucy's waist, dragging her close as he took in her relaxing scent.

"Yeah, I saw it." He admitted, but rather than comment further, he held his hand up, a shining, silver necklace dangling from his fingers. "You were eyeing this earlier right?"

"Don't you try and change the subject, you don't have to pretend you're not angry you know-" Her eyes lit up in excitement and she bit her lip, holding back an excited squeal, "You didn't!" He grinned, feeling her relax into his hold as they began to walk through the crowd. The man from earlier, slowly being forgotten between the two of them. It's not as it mattered any, after all. This wasn't the last time someone wanted to date Lucy and who could blame them? Certainly not Natsu. "Eh, I may have had some jewels I could spare," He said casually, eyes looking everywhere but at Lucy as she accepted the necklace and stared with endearing eyes. As much as he liked doing small things for her, the look she fixed him with always made the butterflies come and his confidence dwindle into a strange shyness he didn't want to reveal to others. He cleared his throat and tightened his hold on her waist, stiffening when her own hand wrapped around his own, squeezing lightly as they walked. Oh yes, it really didn't matter.

Because while they couldn't accept no. He got a yes.

[whaleofatjme1920]

The Ends of Hallways (Proxies X F!Reader)

The Ends of Hallways

[Proxies X F!Reader]

[Warnings: slight language]

[AN: Y'all are just gonna have to thank Eris for always sending me the best requests. I don't have favorites,,, but Reader, I have favorites. Also no Kate sorry :( ]

Your face was practically squished against the glass of the car Hoodie had stolen as the four of you pull into the parking lot of woods that brim with the Operator’s energy. You’ve never seen these woods in person - only in dreams. You’ve never even really seen your master in person, once again, like these woods, he too has been confined to your dreams. But you hear him, and often. His voice falls down on your ears like gentle rains that fall from the heavens. He is everything and more. That is why it is so exciting for you to finally be here, so close to him, and to his presence.

“You excited?” You hear your group leader ask.

You nod and press harder up against the glass. “Are we going now?” You’re ready to bounce out of the car and everyone can see that.

He chuckles in response. “What do you think Hood? Time to go?”

The hazel eyed man behind him shoots the driver a look. “Masky, just look at her, she’s gonna break the window if we don’t.” There’s a slight playfulness in his tone that tells you the right hand really isn’t annoyed with you.

“Fair enough,” Masky smiles. He then reaches behind his seat, hand slapping at who used to be the runt’s knee. “Tobes? Tob-Tobes, get up.”

Toby’s eyes shoot open as he lurches forward. “I’m u-u-up, I-I’m u-up,” he yawns as his hands rub tiredly at his eyes. “Are w-w-we here a-alaready?” He asks, the exhaustion still clear in his tone.

Both of the men in the front seats nod. “C’mon, let’s get going,” Hoodie says as he pulls up the lock on his car door before sliding out.

You wait impatiently for Masky to unlock the car then zip out like a bat from hell. You’re immediately at the edge of one of the forest’s many trails and taking in the sights and sounds of your boss’s woods. They’re beautiful, really. The autumn colors bathe the woods in fiery oranges and passionate reds with threads of gold to interlock it all together. The sky is just the slightest shade of blue as clouds cover the sun. There weren’t any people here either - not under the little structures, not exploring, not anyone but you and your comrades.

“Wrong one,” Hoodie says as he closes the trunk to the car before tossing a backpack to Toby, who catches it like second nature.

You whip your head around to see that Masky, Hoodie and Toby are smiling at how excited you are before silently asking you to follow them. “Where are we going?” You ask, eyes wide as you jog up to them.

“Across the field. There’s this cool tunnel of trees we think you’ll appreciate,” Masky replies as he leads his group across the grass. It crunches slightly as the four of you move, like it hasn’t been watered in a long time.

“R-Really?” Toby hums as he puts his hands in his pockets. “You s-s-sure we’re n-not gonna be l-late?” The young proxy gives a slight look to his group leader, eyebrow raised as if he’s sure the Operator is okay with them possibly being tardy.

Masky shakes his head before tapping his temple with his free hand, “he told me it’s okay.”

“He did?” You ask as stars cloud your eyes. The Operator, as you’ve heard so far, is to be feared and respected. He’s like a father you can look at but never touch. He seems so out of your range, like he’s not even visible - not even if you squint your eyes. You wonder what makes you so… interesting… in his eyes. You really don’t think you’re worth all the fuss. Clearly he does.

Masky chuckles before ruffling your hair with his hand, “yeah. I think he finds your enthusiasm endearing.” Masky’s not entirely incorrect. When they first got Toby, the Operator was strangely favorable towards the young proxy as well - maybe because he was hand plucked, special, and therefore deemed worthy of his time. You were similar to Toby, albeit, you accidentally got involved with the Operator. He liked you, chose you, then kept you.

Hoodie whistles slightly as the four of you step into the trees, his gloved hand reaching up to tear off a branch from one of the low hanging trees then swing it aimlessly as his side. “Seems pretty obvious in my opinion,” he whacks Toby lightly with the stick making said proxy laugh. “Looks like Toby isn’t the only golden child anymore.”

“P-Probably not,” Toby hums, a slight melancholy coming into his tone. “Think I-I’ve been losing f-f-favor with h-hin for a w-while.” He glances over his shoulder and smiles at you.

You frown slightly and place your hand on his shoulder, “I don’t think so,” you say. “Just means he has two golden child-s now.”

Toby beams.

You do too.

The group continues to move through the trees, mostly silent save for Masky and Hoodie pointing out little memories from time to time. Things such as some guy named ‘Alex’ chasing them through here, Masky’s waking up with no memory, Hoodie’s nature shots, and everything in between. You learn a lot about the hands of your group from when they were just scared film students to the things they’ve done as proxies here. It’s kind of nice as you’ve never really spoken to them this way before.

When you first came into this life and were placed in this group, the hazing process kicked in like wildfire. Almost every day was a mentally or physically, sometimes both, a draining task and a bonding agent. Authority was not to be questioned and they made that more than clear. Eventually, the hazing grew lighter and lighter until it just… didn’t exist. That was how it went - you were no longer considered naive and starry eyed. Still, authority was not to be questioned, and it’s why you and your comrades have never really talked on this specific level before.

It’s why it’s such a treat that you get to talk to them like this now.

Eventually, the four of you make it to an odd stretch of trees. They tunnel over each other, a lot like a thorny funnel, but they frame the sky so well.

“If the sun was setting,” Masky starts. “It would look like a cradle.”

You take a step back and observe the tunnel of trees, trying to imagine the setting sun. The mental image is pretty. “Will we ever be back here to see it?”

“Oh definitely,” Masky continues. “But uh, the business we’re here for today? Don’t know if that’s meant for anyone but me and maybe Hoodie.”

You look on instinct to Hoodie who nods. “Is that normal?”

“Sure is,” Hoodie says as he takes in the scent of the cooling autumn woods. He knows the group is almost to the limits of the Operator’s realm. “Tell me what you feel right now, Reader,” he says in passing as he flicks the stick somewhere off the given trail.

With a glance around at your surroundings, you attempt to get a feel for the area you’re in. It’s cold, much colder, but the atmosphere still feels a little thick. The further you go into the woods (and by extension the Operator’s bounds to which you don’t even know exist yet), you get that odd feeling in your legs that feels like they’ve fallen asleep. It’s like the physical sensation of static. You try to explain it in words, but they fail. Instead, you allow Hoodie into your thoughts.

“Nice,” he smiles. “Alright, try to ask for permission in.”

“I need to ask for permission?”

“E-Everytime,” Toby begins as he and the others pause. They’re right on the edge of the bubble and can feel it so much stronger than you can. “It’s t-to ensure n-normal humans c-can’t come in,” Toby begins to explain as you gaze around your surroundings, wondering how you’ll even begin to ask. “T-Though, their f-feelings sometimes k-kick into o-overdrive and they e-end up p-piercing through the v-veil on a-a-accident.” He chuckles softly and you know exactly what he’s referring to - you’ve heard tales of the people who get stuck wandering where they shouldn’t: always ends in someone strung up in the pines. “W-We’ve all learned t-to ask p-permission like b-breathing.”

You shoot your comrade a confused glance, wondering what that will mean for you. “I just ask?”

“Kind o-of,” Toby says. “Just l-let your f-f-feelings guide you. She’ll t-t-tell you whether you’re a-a-allowed in or not.”

You close your eyes and begin to hone in on whatever your heart is telling you. It’s a cold feeling, mostly like vines that slip up and down your limbs as they grow upwards and then inwards towards your heart. It’s an odd feeling. Once the static vines pierce through your heart, you physically see a fog roll into the forest around you. It consumes you and your comrades before you remember Toby mentioned ‘she.’ The fog thickens. “Wait, she?” You say as the static begins to leave your system. It feels like you’re tearing through roots as you walk forward.

“He didn’t mean it,” Masky quickly replies as he begins to pull you through the fog. “Good job on asking though. Strong response,” he says as gestures to the fog, his hand swimming through the billowy clouds. “Wives’ tale is the stronger the fog, the more genuine you were in response.”

You wade your fingers through the thick fog as you and the others walk forward, deeper and deeper into the darkness where there was none. “Must’ve had a really genuine response, huh?” You mumble to yourself. The fog doesn’t even feel like normal fog - it feels thick and heavy and leaves slight dew on your clothing as you walk. How interesting.

‘Head talk from here on out,’ Hoodie says as the four of you reach a stretch of woods that feels slightly dangerous.

‘Did you feel it too?’ Toby asks, his hand at his hatchet.

Hoodie nods slightly, his eyes narrowing as he slows his pace so he’s guarding the back. He gives you a slightly concerned look as the fog evens out. Everyone but you knows that they’re in perhaps one of the most dangerous parts of the veil. The Operator’s mere presence is usually enough to deter the things like the Rake from his grounds, but that often means they get trapped here - in the in-between - and lash out on the first thing they sense. The sooner the four of you get out of this dangerous spot, the better.

‘What do you sense?’ You ask, cutting mentally through the rough silence, your own hand moving to your blade.

Hoodie looks like he’s about to answer you before he holds his fist up and the other three of you duck down instantly, dipping below the fog. Just then, some deer begin walking past.

‘Deer?’ You say in a questioning tone.

‘Not just any deer,’ Hoodie begins as the deer slowly nibbles on the leaves and other things. ‘Take a good look at their bodies. They look normal to you?’

You narrow your eyes slightly and get used to peering through the fog as the deer pass. Eventually, you’re able to look at their coats. There’s something off about them, something wrong. Something you can’t quite place. The longer you watch them as they move in front of you, the stronger that off feeling gets. They have every physical part of the deer down but it’s just not right. It’s like their joints don’t fit well beneath their skin. And their eyes… Their eyes are completely hollow.

‘You see it?’ Masky asks as the last of the deer passes by. He glances over his shoulder briefly to see you nod. ‘We’re lucky they didn’t change this time,’ he mumbles, slowly inching forward while crouched against the earth.

‘What would’ve happened if they changed?’ You inquire, moving quietly alongside your comrades.

‘Nightmare fuel,’ Toby finally pipes in. ‘Nothing about them looks right. Big mouths full of sharp teeth, black eyes, too many limbs, like a messed up centipede,’ he finishes, a slight shudder coming into his mental tone.

You notice the other two of your group members nodding in agreement before finally deeming it safe enough to stand up and finally exit the in-between of the veil.

You’re greeted to the sight of a beautiful, rustic looking Germanic mansion surrounded by iron gates that hold honeycomb patterns that trail skywards only to end on sharp peaks that you’re almost certain your boss has spiked people on plenty of times. There’s also flowers of every kind in the front gardens that catch your eyes the moment you step through the grand gates. There’s fountains and topiaires, statues and benches that tell you the Operator drips with style and elegance.

“Pretty, isn’t it?” Masky smiles.

You nod, “it’s gorgeous.” The air smells slightly expensive, but mostly sweet. How is it that a place like this can even possibly exist? Around the mansion are autumnal trees, mostly maple, some sycamore and other birch. Scattered on the front lawn are other proxies and some independents, mostly catching up and talking before leaving through the same gates you entered from. Some of them smile and wave as they pass you, others grunt and turn their nose up at you upon realizing you’re the youngest. This place sings with the Operator’s overwhelming presence.

Your comrades continue to watch your amused expression as they lead you to the front doors of the mansion. They’re large and stained glass, slightly gothic in woodwork and tower over you.

“Go ahead,” Hoodie chuckles as he nods for you to open the doors.

You glance back to him, then at the large doors before tentatively placing your hands on their surface. With a small breath, you push them open and find yourself greeted to the most exquisite foyer you’ve ever seen. Large chandeliers hang from the ceiling, sapphires and rubies drip from the fixtures and shine the light beautifully across the marble floors. Gold leaf adorns almost everything that juts out while the huge staircase in front of you beckons you forward.

“Doesn’t seem like he needs us yet,” Masky says as he checks his watch. “Got here earlier than expected, huh?” He lightly ribs Hoodie who rolls his eyes in response. “C’mon, let’s go to the sun room. Don’t wanna wait around in here.” He nods for the three of you to follow.

Toby clears his throat slightly as if to remind the two in charge that you’re still very much here and new.

“Oh, right,” Masky says. “Reader, this is super important, so listen up,” your group leader begins as he turns on his heels to eventually rest his hands on your shoulders.

You raise a brow at his sudden contact. Masky normally didn’t touch you unless what he had to say was important - which really, really didn’t happen often.

“This mansion likes to play off your thoughts, feelings, and logic,” he says, his hand gesturing to the staircase that’s slowly moving directions. You didn’t even hear it begin to shift. “The Operator usually keeps things in line for when he summons you, it’s almost a guaranteed path you’ll make it to him, but,” his eyes go serious. “If it’s just you and you’re moving around, you need to have a place in mind or it’ll accidentally spit you out somewhere totally random. We’ve had people get lost in here because the mansion is slightly playful and weirdly baneful depending on the individual walking around.”

“The Operator has a playful side?”

Masky stifles a laugh before shaking you lightly. “I legitimately mean it, you need to have a place in mind or you’re gonna get lost and the Operator isn’t gonna be happy. By extension, I won’t be happy because I need to come get you.”

“Mhm,” Hoodie nods in agreement. “And you can’t have the thought in passing either, it’s gotta be on your mind until it’s in sight.” After Hoodie’s words leave his mouth, Masky lets you go.

You take all the information in and wonder just what makes the place run. It’s like it has its own personality - it’s playful and baneful? You have to ask it permission to even enter its grounds and it deems whether you’re worthy or not? What kind of power does the Operator even have and why on earth would he even care about that kind of stuff? If he truly wanted his proxies to access him, he’d do it with no hesitation. The humans that would wander into his rooms would just end up tasting someone’s blade.

“Sun room?” Hoodie reminds Masky.

Your entire walk to the sun room you try to conjure a mental image in your head. They say it’s doubtful you’ll get lost so long as you’re with them, but you consider it good practice. When you finally make it to the sun room, you’re pleased to see it’s relatively empty save for a few groups interspersed in the large, window adorned room overlooking a silver lake. There’s a few independents walking around with carts holding different tea time finger-foods and waiting tea sets on every table. Maasky leads you over to one of the tables nearest to the view of the lake.

“So, what business exactly are we here for today?” You ask as you waste no time in pouring yourself some tea.

Masky shrugs, “no idea. He said he just wanted us to come.”

“T-Think he r-really only n-needs an audience w-with them though,” Toby adds before silently thanking you for pouring him some tea as well. “L-Leaves us some t-t-time to chat. Y’know, t-the thing H-Hood hates us d-doing,” he lightly jokes.

Hoodie scoffs and feigns being annoyed, “I only hate you two chatting when we’re in the middle of tearing out some guy’s entrails.”

“Y-Yeah, which is a-all the time,” Toby giggles.

You laugh as well.

The four of you are in a heated argument about something relatively stupid when static overtakes Masky and Hoodie’s hearing. They visibly pause, as if they’re trying to key into something you can’t understand when it suddenly stops.

“Have t-to go?” Toby inquires before taking a strawberry tart and popping it into his mouth.

Both Masky and Hoodie nod.

“Yeah. Keep an eye on Reader, please? We won’t be too long,” Masky replies with a small, tired smile.

Toby flashes the two a thumbs up before the both of you watch them leave, a clear destination on their minds.

It’s not long until Toby gets distracted by some other independents that stroll into the mansion. You recognize the two of them as relatively minor legends - well, maybe not the one with the smile. His name is Jeff.

“So, this is your fresh meat, huh?” Jeff chuckles as he lightly pushes Toby’s shoulder. “She looks a little scrawny. Are you feeding her right?”

Toby laughs and nods, “Masky w-w-would lose his m-mind if you s-s-said that.”

Jeff’s chest rumbles as he laughs. “I’m joking,” he holds his hand up as a sign of truce. “Hope you know you’re running with one of the only decent groups out there, Reader,” he says before picking up his tea cup. It looks slightly comical as he brings it to his lips.

You offer him a smile and nod, “yeah, I know.”

The man to Jeff’s left nods in agreement, “Masky’s really good at what he does. Got one of the best.”

Toby immediately fights the notion (playfully) and the three engage in conversation that’s lively and vibrant all the same. You listen to the three verbally duke it out before you find yourself bored. You can’t just leave though, but you want to move at the same time.

“Toby?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I excuse myself?”

“W-Where to?”

“Washroom,” you reply.

“Do y-you need m-me to a-accompany y-y-you?”

Both Eyeless Jack and Jeff scoff.

“She’s a big girl, let her go,” Jeff says as he nods his own approval for you to go. “You told her about the mindset thing?”

Toby nods.

“Yeah, then she’s good to go,” Eyeless Jack agrees.

You flash the men at your table a smile before getting up. You push in your chair and then make it to the entrance of the sunroom, leading into the halls. You don’t have a set destination in mind. The moment you step out of the sunroom, you feel the air change. It’s not unpleasant, but it’s different. On instinct, you turn your gaze over your shoulder to see the sunroom is gone. It’s just hall and lining the hall are doors upon doors.

Alright, you can work with that! A small smile comes to your face as you begin to walk forwards, allowing your curiosity to bloom. The first door you decide to open is one that’s honestly not that exciting. It was just a storage unit. Another was a study. Then it was someone’s room. Another room. And another. How many residence rooms are there?

You close yet another door and then feel a thought come into your head, taking a seat on your train of thought like a butterfly sunbathes on a flower. She - Toby had mentioned it. And you wondered. You let the thought stay. Before you know it, you’re walking through the halls guided by forces you don’t quite understand, and the further you get into the mansion, the stranger the atmosphere becomes. It’s not unpleasant, but it’s not a normal feeling either. You watch as the light fixtures change from something relatively modern and regress into something more vintage. The dust begins to kick up. Irish lace begins to pepper the ceiling. You notice how the doors change style as well. How strange.

Eventually, you reach a dead end stretch of hall. At the very end of this hall is a singular door that looks weathered, as if it was sunbleached and painted over in oils. There’s an elegance to it you can’t quite place, and like a siren song, you find yourself being beckoned to it. Your proxy instincts kick in like second nature the closer you draw to it. You feel your breathing lighten, your steps as well, and you move towards it with a silence that is unmatched - as if you’re floating on air. You draw closer and closer to the door. It’s so magnetic, and you can’t quite explain why/ But closer still you must be to it.

Your hand tenderly grasps the doorknob - it feels like ice - and you twist it open. You wonder if you should be doing this. A part of you feels like you shouldn’t be doing this, but another part of you says this is what you were meant to see. You push the door open ever so slightly, just enough to be able to see inside, but the door is heavy, almost as if it doesn’t want you to. Like it’s trying to protect you from something further. You wonder if it just wishes to keep its secrets.

It’s gorgeous, it truly is. It puts the rest of the mansion to shame. It looks old - perhaps from 16th century Germany and fit for royalty. Plants of all kinds line the walls. They look like emeralds as light shines through their leaves. The sunlight kisses the flowers that sprout from the stalks. Beautiful woodwork surrounds the windows that are covered in fairytale-esque stained glass pieces. The scent is of something much, much sweeter and warmer than the rest of the mansion. Your eyes then draw to the center of the room, where an ornate table sits. There’s gold leaf decorating its legs followed by symbols you can’t really pin down. A tablecloth that looks like it was weaved from the stars above is the only thing that separates a delicate tea set from the precious mahogany table. The tea smells heavenly from where you stand.

Before you can press into the room, you pause upon seeing slender, pale hands take hold of the tea pot. Your eyes follow upwards to the owner of the hands only to see a woman so much more beautiful than the moon in twilight and the sun in the morning. Falling from her shoulders was golden hair that looked like a sea of amber as it cascaded down near the floor. Flowers were woven into it - mostly snowdrops, baby’s breath and queen Anne’s lace. She’s dressed in something from medieval Europe, and never once does her sleeve touch the table. She begins to pour herself some tea, a honey like hum coming from her being as she pours the sweet liquid. Her eyes flick upwards for but a moment when she hears a bird chirping outside. Her eyes are so dark, there exists no white sclera. They’re so dark, like black holes that hide in the depths of space, but you feel as if she holds the universe inside of them. She’s so beautiful, you’re not sure she’s real. A cat has jumped up onto the table, purring at her. When she smiles, your heart sings.

You want to say hello to her and spend time in her presence when you attempt to open the door some more. It creaks slightly. The hinges are ancient. Before you can say anything, the door is slammed shut, sending you flying backwards. You let out a sound of shock before seeing Toby reaching down to get you.

“What t-the hell a-a-are you thinking?” He hisses as he picks you up, grabbing your bicep and beginning to drag you away from the door that still holds your attention. “You r-really just w-wandered off l-like that?”

You furrowed your eyebrows, attempting to get free of his grasp as he continues to pull you along. No matter how hard you smack at him, he doesn’t let go.

“M-Masky said it’s not s-safe for y-y-you to wander o-off. A-And without m-me? D-D-Did you have a-any cognitive t-t-thought when you w-went out on a l-limb like t-that?” He sounds so heated.

You find he’s bringing you back to the sunroom, undoubtedly going to tell Masky and Hoodie about your misbehavior. “Why are you being so weird?” You retort as you attempt to wriggle out of his grasp. “It’s just a room!” You cry out in an exasperated tone.

Toby only reprimands you louder. It’s a losing game.

You eventually find yourself back in the sunroom. Only, instead of Eyeless Jack and Jeff, you see the deeply concerned and slightly pissed off faces of Masky and Hoodie. They’re not happy to see you, and you’re not exactly thrilled to see you either.

“Take a s-s-seat,” Toby says in a harsh tone as he thrusts you back into your seat.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Masky asks, not even attempting to mask his voice because that’s the privilege of being a proxy. You’re able to reprimand your proxies without anyone giving a care.

“You can’t just go off like that,” Hoodie continues as he furrows his brows. “You could’ve gotten-”

“Hurt? This is the Operator’s mansion, what the fuck is gonna hurt me in here other than himself or you two?”

“That’s it,” Masky points out. “He can seriously hurt you if you snoop where you shouldn’t!” His hands grips at your wrist, tightening to a point of pain.

When you feel tears prick your eyes, Hoodie sighs and puts his hand on Masky’s shoulder, “stop it.”

Masky hesitantly lets you go.

“What did you see?” Hoodie asks with a deep sigh, his posture tensing. He’s really hoping you didn’t see the Operator’s trophy room.

You give your comrades a concerned look, not sure whether you should answer or not when Hoodie raises a slight brow. Damn it. You’re emotionally compromised. He’s seeing what he needs to without your permission.

“That’s… Odd…” He says.

Masky glances to Hoodie. “No.”

“Unfortunately, I think yeah,” Hoodie says with a growing frown. He glances to Toby for confirmation, and upon seeing Toby’s nod, says “yeah,” again.

Masky groans and puts his face into his hands, finding comfort in being buried into himself.

You hold your wrist in your hand and lean back in your chair. “Just… What is it you guys aren’t telling me?” You question, hoping they’d just bite the bullet and tell you.

The group shares a look, debating whether they should even say it or not. When no one says anything, you press them again.

“Come on,” you sigh. “It can’t be that bad.”

“It really could be,” Masky says as he finally releases his face from his hands. “No one knows what seeing it does.”

Your eyes widen before you bark a laugh. “What?”

“No, he’s serious,” Hoodie picks up. “Seeing that door is rare, like, rainbow pikachu rare. Proxies think it’s an omen or a bad luck thing. To see it means a group’s eventual demise.”

You briefly scoff at the thought of proxies being superstitious before you remember some of you can actually cast portals. It’s really not that out of pocket.

“N-No one has e-e-ever found o-out though,” Toby shrugs. “W-We just know t-that the g-groups that h-h-have n-normally e-end in death.” He looks a little uncomfortable as he says the words, like there’s a legitimate truth to what he’s saying even though he’d rather it be utter BS.

“To be fair, we thought it was a rumor prior to you sneaking off,” Hoodie says as he tries to calm down his group.

You take in this information with a small frown. How could something that beautiful be that evil or a harbinger of doom? The thought of it left you perplexed as your comrades continued to lecture you on not wandering off until Masky and Hoodie were called away.

“I don’t know if I feel comfortable leaving Reader here with-”

Toby rolls his eyes, “you c-cant just s-say you want m-me to come with i-instead. N-Not need to insult m-my competence a-a-as a babysitter,” he mumbles before glancing down to his hatchets.

Masky sighs and nods for Toby to follow him out. Looks like it’s just you and Hoodie.

“So,” you awkwardly begin, not really sure what to do or what to say.

“So,” Hoodie hums back. “Anywhere you wanted to go?” When he sees the glint in your eyes, he shakes his head. “Like, a normal place. We’re gonna be here for a while while those two are out,” he chuckles, watching as you visibly deflate.

You allow the question to bang around in your head until you nod with a thought in mind. “The library. I’d like to go to the library.”

Hoodie smiles at that suggestion and finishes the rest of his tea before standing up. He stretches for a moment, then leads you to the hallway your original snooping began. You noticed as his thoughts immediately became clouded with the word and vision of ‘library’ as the two of you trekked the halls. As you walked, you barely recognized any of the doors you passed. They weren’t on your radar, which was odd in your opinion as you had opened a lot of door you probably shouldn’t have.

Eventually, you reach two large oak doors. Hoodie pushes them open and you’re greeted to the sight of a beautiful library. It’s impossibly huge - how could such a place exist in the mansion? You’re well aware it’s a huge place, but the fact that all of this is here… It’s bigger than a downtown city library you visited when passing through Chicago a few months ago. The Operator’s influence is beautiful, isn’t it?

“I’m gonna be in the sci-fi section,” Hoodie says as he nods over to the right wing of the library. “It’s on the second floor.” You notice the spiral staircase that leads to what appears to be a balcony - it must stretch backwards forever. “Check in with me in about 15 minutes. Don’t do anything stupid.” It’s surprising how relaxed he’s being with you. You would have expected someone like Hoodie to be a lot angerier and more observational.

Not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, you nod and flash him a thumb’s up before bounding over to the left wing of the library. Nothing is properly labeled, but you get a strong bout of intuition where everything is. Right now, you’re on the hunt for history.

The aisle that holds the history books looks just as old as you would have expected it to. The books here aren’t any you’ve ever seen in stores either - they’re largely from the time period they’re to be representing. Some are more modern, but you get the feeling that they don’t exist anywhere else but under the Operator’s influence. You find a few books that talk about the early history of proxies, some on independents, but nothing to inform you on what you had found.

It’s honestly a little maddening. You check in with Hoodie when you have to - he asks you to list the spines of the books you’re currently looking at - and then you’re back to your fruitless search. You run up and down the halls of the history section looking for anything when you hear static begin to buzz in your heads. The feeling travels upwards like the vines you felt earlier from your heels to your chest. When they claw deep into your heart, you feel a pull. And once again, like a sailor beckoned to the rocks due to a siren’s song, you follow it.

It twists and turns you through the shelves, making you zip past the few proxies and independents that are currently visiting this wing of the library before you’re drawn to a rotunda. You look backwards and see in the distance the front doors of the library. When did this place get a middle wing? It was just straight shelves and a wall with large windows overlooking the rolling hills of the woods. You turn your attention upwards to the ceiling of the rotunda. There’s a large skylight that allows sunlight to cascade down. Around that are gems you don’t even know the name of that weave a mosaic of something positively divine. You allow your gaze to follow the shaft of warm sunlight down, and there, sitting at a table with a book in hand (it looks like a journal) is the Operator himself.

“S-Sir!” You manage to squeak out as you find yourself startled to be in his presence, Heat rises to your cheeks when he looks up from his book to turn his attention to you.

“How did you get here?” He asks, confusion etching his body as he curiously tilts his head.

Your breath hitches. “I’m so sorry,” you apologize, bowing your head almost immediately. “I don’t know how I got here. It just felt like a pull and suddenly I was here? I was in the left wing and looking over history books and I-” you continue to rattle off until the Operator holds up his hand, silently signaling you to stop. You do so as soon as he asks.

“I-. It’s no matter,” he waves off. “Come, sit down beside me.” An inky black tendril sprouts from his back as he pulls the chair in front of him out, allowing you to sit in his presence.

You will your stone-like legs forward and attempt to gracefully take a seat in front of him. It’s a slightly awkward silence before he speaks again.

“How have you been, Miss Reader?”

“I’m alright,” you reply, voice no higher than a whisper.

The Operator hums. “Good.”

Another pregnant pause.

“Child, where is your book?”

“I uh, didn’t grab one?” You answer softly. You can tell the Operator is looking at you with what he can convey to his fullest as confusion. “When I was pulled here I just.. Followed,” you attempt to explain. “I don’t know why I’m here.”

“And what have you done today?” He asks, giving his passing attention to you like a father would.

You bite your lip before steering the conversation towards the room you saw. “I think I met someone.”

“You did, did you?”There’s a passing interest as if he’s saying ‘that’s nice, honey.’

You nod. “She was in a tea room-”

He pauses.

“I found her by accident-”

He makes sure he’s hearing you correctly.

“Her hair was golden-”

He looks up.

“She had plants-”

He’s sitting upright now.

“She had a cat-”

He leans forward.

“Her smile rivaled the stars-”

He’s focusing so intently on you now.

“Her voice was like honey-”

He entirely focused on you.

“She was beautiful.”

The Operator’s ichor pauses for just a moment as he takes in the description of the woman you described. It makes a part of him sing and another part of him sob. He hasn’t heard of her in so, so long.

When you look up, you see the Operator practically leaned halfway over the table and entirely focused on you. It makes you jump. “I’m sorry,” you apologize sheepishly, thinking you saw something you shouldn’t have. “I wasn’t thinking and I uh, think the mansion led me to her?”

The Operator wordlessly nods. “Was she pouring tea?” He asked, voice so much gentler than anything you could ever expect him to conjure up.

You slowly nod. “She was.”

The Operator suddenly slumps down, making you jolt. You rise on instinct to help him when he waves you back down. “Do you realize who you’ve come into contact with?” He asks.

You shake your head. “I’m afraid not, Sir,” you say with slight remorse.

The Operator chuckles deeply - it rumbles his chest and in your head. “You found her.” He could smile, you were sure it would be from ear to ear if he had the correct facial features. “All these years later and you found her.” He emphasizes you like a bittersweet affirmation.

“Who is she?” You ask softly.

Your boss sits back up again. “Someone who loves me,” his tendril sprouts once again from his back and moves towards you. “Someone who loves you,” it taps your nose. “Someone who loves us.” The tendril makes a grand, sweeping gesture.

You take in the words and nod, still not knowing what they mean. Upon seeing your confusion, he decides to elaborate.

“A long, long time ago, in a realm you could not begin to fathom, there was light and there was dark,” he begins, his voice slipping into something akin to someone saying a bedtime story. “I was the light, and that cur we call Zalgo was the dark.”

You scrunch your nose at the sound of his name.

“The dark and the light were born from nothing, and she was beautiful.” His audible smile is actually endearing to hear. “Throughout the years, the light and the dark fought, constantly at each other's throats. It was woven in the threads of history, it had been our birthright. When we came to this place, this planet after being cast from our home - a palace amongst all palaces, a kingdom that rose far above any other, the nothingness came with us. She called herself Liebevolle Frau. She loved her children.” By this point in the story, the Operator has taken the liquids from the coffee cup he drinks from and animated them into the characters for this story.

You watch with stars in your eyes.

“But no guardian is without its favorites, and I happened to be hers.” Liebevolle Frau’s figure was shown sheltering the Operator’s much smaller one. “And this caused a rift that could not be mended through the light and dark. Eventually, the dark waged war on the light.”

It’s a war you’re still fighting to this day.

“In the 1500s, long after this mansion had been built and my power continued to grow, Zalgo had almost wiped us off the face of the earth to splatter out remains across all the five realms. Liebevolle Frau, thought caught off guard,” that would explain the tea, “sheltered me and protected this place and all who resided in it. At the time,” the Operator looks at you. “Independents and proxies had lived here much more commonly than they do now.”

You smile softly.

“Liebevolle Frau’s power had been pushed to its limit in holding back her first born son, and mind, as well as her heart, broke because of it. In her remaining moments of lucidity, she imbued herself, her soul,” the liquids take the form of something fluttering and soft, like a bird, “her everything, and became the place I hold jurisdiction over today.”

Your eyes widen as you think back to the odd feelings you’ve had coming here for today - and Toby’s slip-up.

“I have not been able to find her since the late 1500s,” The Operator explains as the liquids dance back into the coffee mug, the figure of Liebevolle Frau taking a hair longer than the rest. “She lives in everything.”

You’re honestly speechless over everything the Operator has said because it’s so… It’s strangely heartfelt. You’ve never even spoken face to face with your boss and when you do, it’s because some force is guiding you to do so. But if that force felt so alive, it must have meant she wanted you to know.

“Her physical form,” you finally manage to wisp out. “She wanted to be at peace, didn’t she?”

The Operator chuckles deeply. “I would assume so.”

Before you can respond to anything or even come up with another response, you hear both Masky AND Hoodie yelling for you in your head. The jarring difference between your boss’s gentle voice and Masky and Hoodie crying out for blood is enough to make you jump (once again).

Upon seeing your sudden switch in atmosphere, the Operator hushes the voices in your head and calls them to his side.

Toby is the first to show up though, and quickly trailing after him is Masky and Hoodie. They both look ready to reprimand you but upon seeing you sitting with the Operator, nothing but reverence crosses their minds and bodies.

“Good evening, Sir,” Masky says as he bows his head. “Are you well?”

“Thoughtful, aren't you, Timothy?” There’s no animosity or anger in the Operator’s tone, but it makes Masky blush all the same.

A pregnant pause passes.

“I was just speaking with your newest member, Miss Reader,” a pale hand gestures to you. “Come, join us. I could use the company.”

You watch as confused glances get shared between your three comrades before they take a seat beside you.

A pleasant silence passes through the air before a gentle humming that’s sweeter than honey overtakes it like a passing breeze.