#and the worst is to know that whatever it come it's totally gonna break our hearts

[ratguy-nico]

Im not part of the Helluva Boss fandom but Im gonna judge you directly and personally

I don't hear near enough talking about this song

We get over this song way to fast

I know my bird have had many hit songs but people I've been listening to this shit non stop and crying every freaking time, is just...is too much 😭😭🤧

[livwritesstuff]

‘tis my birthday today (it’s gotta be one of the worst birthdays to have, we don’t need to talk about it) anyways that’s where this is coming from

(also i’m not trying to imply that jan 1 is eddie’s bday. i wouldn’t wish that on anybody. besides, he is def a weirdo february aquarius)

The second half of the calendar year is nothing short of pandemonium for Eddie and Steve and their three daughters.

Moe’s birthday in late July kicks it off, almost immediately followed by Steve’s birthday in early August, then Hazel’s in September. Robbie’s birthday comes mere days after Halloween, and from there they dive headfirst into the bedlam of the holiday season.

Much to Eddie's relief, they all made it to yet another New Year's Day, and while the girls are definitely feeling the end-of-winter-break blues, Eddie welcomes the reprieve in festivities, brief as it may be.

His own birthday is up next – though not for another month.

He’s really not a birthday kind of guy. Never had been.

He loves making birthdays exciting for Steve and their daughters (they have a whole slew of traditions and everything – there’s names spelled out in pancakes involved; it's a very big deal), but his own…not so much.

It managed to fly under the radar for the past few years, but since this year is the big Five-Oh, he knows Steve won’t let him get away with that again.

Eddie has a complicated relationship with his birthday. When he was younger and the weight of Birthday Importance was at its peak, he never really celebrated the way other kids got to, and now, as an adult, he doesn’t know how to feel the things you’re supposed to feel about your birthday. 

Steve does a good job, despite Eddie’s weirdness. 

His favorite, Eddie thinks, was the year Moe was born, when Steve had managed to catch him off guard by renting a tiny cottage up in Maine for a few days.

“Moe or no Moe,” Steve had asked, “I’ve got Rob and Nance on standby.”

(They’d taken Moe. She saw snow for the first time. It was amazing, and people who don't want to involve their kids in stuff are a bunch of fucking weirdos).

Steve gives him a letter every year – handwritten on notebook paper and folded into whatever cheesy card he picks out.

Eddie keeps most of the letters in a fireproof lockbox along with all their passports and social security cards and birth certificates (look – Eddie doesn’t fuck around with priceless shit), but he keeps the most recent one – the one Steve gave him for his forty-ninth birthday nearly a year ago – in the top drawer of his bedside table.

He has it pretty much memorized at this point.

It says:

Ed! (with an exclamation point and everything – god, does Eddie love him)

49.

Holy shit we’re getting old.

Writing this is making me think about all the ones from the beginning, when I’d write about our future together even though we didn’t have a damn clue what we were working towards for a while.

I think we’re in it, man. Crazy, right?

(The ink color suddenly switches from blue to purple)

Sorry for the color change. Hazy decided she needed a blue pen immediately. Hope your vision hasn’t gone totally to shit and you can still read the purple.

Anyways, since I have you hostage reading this, I’m gonna take the opportunity to discuss you, because you don’t let me in real life most of the time.

You are gorgeous. Best looking face I’ve ever seen. I wonder how much time I’ve lost off my day just staring at you (actually, not a loss. I take that back)

You suck at puzzles – I know that sounds bad, but it’s great for me. I need that to rub off on Moe because she’s getting pretty good and that’s gonna be a problem for me.

You make me laugh so fucking hard every day. I’m praying the girls get your sense of “elevated” humor or whatever you like to call it

You’re so fucking smart, Eddie. I count myself lucky for it endlessly

You are completely 100% you all the time. I’m still working on that I think but I’m getting there because of you. I’m glad all that shit we went through didn’t take that away from you.

the BEST dad. Can’t believe I didn’t say that sooner. Not to brag but our kids are turning out pretty awesome (can’t go around saying that too much though it’ll go right to their heads and then any power we have left goes out the window)

You’re probably the best person I’ve ever known. Don’t think I’ll be forgetting what a catch you are any time soon, because I won't.

Thank you for loving me even all these years later. My life is better every day that I’m with you.

We’ll keep things quiet this year. Don’t get used to it though. Next year’s gonna be a rager.

Love you always!

- Steve :) ♡ ☆

[howlingday]

"I Didn't Kill Anybody"

Ruby: So... I wanna preface this by saying that I didn't kill anybody. But I almost did... TWICE.

Weiss: ...

Blake: ...Cool?

_________________________________________

Ruby: So when Yang and I were kids, we'd go out into the woods and start playing around. One day, we found a vine, so we got Dad's saw and start hacking down branches and we cut into this vine. We, uh... We cut it down and we started tugging on it and we both said, "Yeah! Yeah, this'll definitely hold us!"

Ruby: Then from out of nowhere, this boy shows up and what me and Yang saw was the perfect guinea pig to test our new swing. The best part, or worst part depending on your perspective, is that it swung over this dried out riverbed that was growing thorn bushes.

Ruby: So Yang is like,

Yang: "Hey! You wanna try~?"

Kid: "Is... Is it safe?"

Ruby: And I was like, "Yeah, totally! We both already swung on it!"

Ruby: And so, uh... This kid gets closer and we toss him the end of the vine. He takes a few steps back, then starts running towards the riverbed. He jumps, swings as hard as he can and then SNAP!

Ruby: The vine breaks and we watch as he falls into... Well, what Yang and I saw as like spinning blades of death. Y'know, normal kid thoughts or whatever. So he starts crying and whimpering and he's bleeding from his arms and his face, but he manages to get out of the bushes and says through his tears,

Kid: "I... I'm gonna go home..."

Ruby: So we were like, "Bye!" But Yang and I thought that we were in trouble, so we buried the saw in the woods right outside our home.

Weiss: What the...

Ruby: And as far as I know, it's still out there, somewhere in the woods. Right by one of the trees. If anyone finds it, they know what happened and they can't tell a soul. (Chuckles)

Blake: The burying of the saw is a... very concerning instinct, especially for a child.

Ruby: (Laughs)

_________________________________________

Ruby: I'm pretty sure he's still alive, whoever that kid is. But it reminds me of another story, the other story where I almost killed somebody!

Blake: Uh... Go for it?

Ruby: So, Yang and I were a little older, and we were out playing by the lake down the road. It's the middle of winter, so it's frozen.

Weiss: Very nice.

Ruby: So Yang and I started testing the edges around the lake, and then we started going out a little further and further until we reached the center, except we didn't get to the center because we could see the center was not frozen.

Ruby: But we kept getting closer and closer as we were playing until this other kid comes over and he's like,

Kid: "You guys playing out there?"

Ruby: "Yeah, come on, it's safe!"

Ruby: So he comes out, and it's all fine at first until... (Chuckles) He... He asked us if over by the center was safe, and we were like, "Yeah, totally!"

Weiss: What the fuck...?

Ruby: So he gets close to the center, and then he falls right through! He goes down, but he comes back up, and me and Yang go over and help him out. He comes out, all wet and shivering and whimpering, and he's like,

Kid: "I... I'm gonna go home..."

Ruby: It might have been the same boy from the woods, but who knows, really?

Weiss: God damn...

Blake: Holy shit...

Ruby: The funniest thing was that our dad was at the lake with us, and I guess he didn't see the other kid, because he was like,

Taiyang: "Hey! You girls know better than to go out onto the lake!"

Ruby: And we're like "Okay~!"

[carigm]

Today Millie had a fan panel in which she answered that her ideal ending would be Mike and El getting married and Will being happy and confessing to Mike (lol) and ofc the Stranger Things fandom kicked up the old Byler vs Mlvn war once again, regardless of the fact she doesn’t write the show. But I want to break down some points here about things I’ve been noticing today, but also for a while and that I think need to be discussed. Keep reading if you want.

I’ve seen a lot of hostility towards Byler and Bylers on Twitter lately, saying we’re delusional and don’t know what we’re talking about. This always seems to be the go to argument even tho it’s all in the narrative. Today it got really bad after Millie’s comments and even people that were merely disagreeing with her opinions got called everything from delusional to misogynistic.

IF the Duffers suddenly decided to ignore everything they’ve carefully crafted and put into their narrative that doesn’t make anyone delusional, it just makes them terrible writers. Who would be doing a great disservice to all three characters involved in the love triangle.

There’s been an insurgence (on Twitter) of so called “Will stans” who seem to be completely fine with the idea of mlvn being endgame because “Will can just get another boyfriend” Not only is this insulting to what the writers have already established for Will’s character but it’s also a defense and endorsement of the worst kind of lazy/bad writing that could graze our screens.

The Duffers CHOSE to tie Will’s character arc to Mike’s and El’s.

How do you expect them to undo that and create a well fleshed out character that’s deserving of Will, in 8 episodes that we know are not just gonna be dedicated to Will’s supposed love interest, because there’s a shit ton of stuff to resolve?

If this was the route the Duffers were going for, they could’ve clearly given Will a love interest last season (like with Robin) or two seasons ago (like with Dustin) And yet somehow, people think it would be totally okay for Will to get the most meaningless romance of all time as the writers ignore the same story they’ve created.

Another point I’ve been seeing a lot from these people is “Mike won’t come out. Let it go. He’s just a very unlikable character” What does that say about the quality of the writing and content you’re willing to consume then? You’re okay with characters being poorly written? And please someone explain to me how Mike’s actions, especially in S4, make any sense unless he likes Will.

The more people try to simplify this story the more plot holes and inconsistencies it creates.

The funny thing is that a lot of these “Will stans” used to be Bylers themselves but are so deathly afraid it won’t be endgame that they’ve started to use the same rhetoric mlvns use every day to justify what would be atrocious writing.

And this next thing might be controversial but I think it needs to be said.

So many people on Twitter have hit those who disagree with Millie’s opinion today with “y’all are misinterpreting Millie’s words” and let me tell you, no one has. She’s been saying the same stuff for forever and quite frankly she’s never had a coherent thought about Will. Which is fine, at the end of the day that’s not the character she plays. However, I haven’t forgotten how last year (at another panel) she was asked about Byler and said it was just a reflection of Finn and Noah’s friendship and that was what people were seeing…

Whatever the fuck that means, I guess.

Again, I’m not taking her answer today too seriously cause truth be told she’s been saying some version of this since she was around twelve, and has even at times said she was joking about it. If a wedding were actually happening she wouldn’t be able to say it cause I’d literally be a spoiler, even if she doesn’t have the scripts yet or doesn’t know I’m sure there’s things that would be off limits for any actor to say at this point.

But this defense squad that formed today begging for us to not misconstrue her words because “she really cares about Will’s character” is laughable.

Her answers regarding the topic of the love triangle have been anything but nuanced. If she doesn’t want to get into it or address it, that’s fine. It’s her choice.

But of course, mlvn stans are gonna take her answers seriously, as well as those who are now “Will stans” who basically ship mlvn too.

And to me there’s a fundamental flaw regarding the ship wars in this fandom, which these people don’t seem to grasp. At this point, it isn’t so much about “which ship is better” but “which outcome isn’t violently homophobic”

That’s it.

I don’t care how much you ship mlvn, this is the undisputed truth here.

But when your lead actors act like it’s not a big deal, it’s no surprise the fandom doesn’t give a shit.

I can only hope the Duffers were smart enough to see reason and were able to write the only outcome that won’t set television back around 10 years or so.

And hopefully one day, when S5 is out, we can get a more in depth and honest conversation with the actors about all of this.

As for me, I’m gonna lay low and not give much of a fuck until we start getting those Reddit leaks, which were very much accurate for last season. I’ll take a peak at those, and depending on what they look like, I’ll stay around or dip completely.

If you read all of this, thank you.

[laundrybiscuits]

(purify our misfit ways tag | AO3)

After the ultimate betrayal that is her best friend experiencing some kind of gay apotheosis about Steve Harrington, Robin’s in no mood to put up with any shenanigans from that quarter.

“How’d you meet Eddie, anyway?”

Ah, so the shenanigans will be starting early today. Robin marshalls all the authority she can muster in knee-high socks and turns to him, hands on her hips.

“Hey, dingus! Did you forget what I said just the other day about harassing him?”

“How am I harassing him? He’s not even here! You sure he’s not your boyfriend? Because you’re sounding kinda—” Steve breaks off and snaps his fingers. “Wait, you totally want him to be your boyfriend, don’t you? That’s why you’re being so weird.”

Robin thumps her head against the display case. She’ll have to clean up the smudge later, but right now it is vitally important that she express her pain in some concrete way.

“How many times do I need to tell you, no. Not my boyfriend, and I wouldn’t date him if he were the last person on earth.”

“C’mon, Robin. I know I’m not, like, your favorite person, but I get it. I’m not gonna tell anyone.”

“The words for how far you are from getting it have yet to be invented in any language,” Robin informs him. “If getting it is here in Hawkins, you are on the other side of Alpha Centauri and getting lightyears farther every second. We’ve sent probes after you, but they’ve fallen prey to decay while attempting to traverse the vast distances between you and getting it.”

“Sure,” Steve drawls, patronizingly. “Whatever you say.” Robin thumps her head against the display case a few more times for good measure.

Steve doesn’t tease her about his extremely wrong assumptions, like she’d expected. It’s much worse: he’s supportive.

“You know, it’s pretty cool that you’re, like, smart. Plenty of guys are into that.”

“Ew,” Robin says. “Please don’t hit on me.”

“What—I’m not! I’m saying, I bet Eddie likes smart girls.”

“Bet you a million bucks he doesn’t,” says Robin flatly.

Also, in her experience, guys do not in fact like smart girls; it doesn’t really matter to her either way, because she bets it would also suck to have a bunch of guys into her for real, but her kind of smarts have only ever made her a target for bruised egos. Kinda funny that Steve Harrington, the guy with the biggest ego she’s ever come across, doesn’t get that.

Maybe it’s not really ego, though. She thinks about the stilted half-truths he’s dropped about his current circumstances; he’s clearly having the worst summer of his life and not exactly coping the best anyone’s ever coped, but he doesn’t seem to be taking it out on anyone else.

Well, she assumes he’s not. It’s not like she knows what he gets up to outside Scoops, but…nobody ever comes to visit him at Scoops. She wonders if his friends even know he’s working here, or that he has to work in the first place.

So if he’s mad and frustrated about his whole situation, and Robin can’t imagine not being mad and frustrated about his whole situation, he’s either being incredibly professional and keeping his temper tantrums to his off-hours, or he’s gone through some kind of evolution. She’s honestly not sure which one’s more likely, even though professional and Steve Harrington should never belong in the same sentence, ever.

She definitely wouldn’t describe him as evolved, though. Case in point: his attempts to be subtle about her alleged romantic inclinations towards Eddie.

“Sometimes, guys are just nervous,” Steve says halfway through their next shift. “I mean, that’s why they might not ask someone out, even if she’s awesome.”

“Please never talk again,” says Robin.

“I’m not talking about anyone special!” Steve holds up his hands, wide-eyed and faux-guileless. “Just, I bet if a girl wanted a guy to ask her out, it would speed things up a lot if she dropped some hints. Give him some hope. That kind of thing.”

She bikes over to Eddie’s place straight from her shift, fueled by new heights of exasperation.

She’s been spending a lot of time there this summer. It’s strange and exciting to have a friend who basically lives alone; she’s met Wayne Munson once or twice, but only ever in passing, and he doesn’t seem to have any rules about how Eddie has to behave in the trailer. Eddie’s never worried about breaking stuff or being home at certain times. He doesn’t even seem to clean up after himself if he doesn’t feel like it. His bedroom floor could probably use a bucket of bleach, or maybe a lit match, but it’s his choice to keep it that way.

Robin is barely seventeen, and that kind of freedom seems so impossibly far away. Of course she knocks on Eddie’s door whenever she gets the chance.

“He’s being nice about it,” she says when he opens the door.

“About…?” Eddie doesn’t ask who he is.

“About how we’re, like, the tragic untold love story of the ages!”

A week ago, she might’ve felt too awkward to refer to anything about romance between them, despite…everything they’ve disclosed. God, she can’t even say the words in her own head unless she works up to it first. Eddie’s been really great about giving her space and not making her talk about it; even aside from The Steve Incident, though, he’s started mentioning stuff about guys now and then. Just little stuff, like thinking actors are cute or whatever. She thinks he might be doing it to reassure her that he wasn’t lying about being gay, which is hilarious because now that she’s looking for it, the whole thing seems really obvious. It’s less hilarious because she knows she’s been slow at working her way back to being totally comfortable with him, hence why she wouldn’t have brought up the idea of them together even a week ago.

That was before two full shifts of Steve Harrington’s well-intentioned meddling pushed her to the breaking point, though. She doesn’t have time to feel weird about things, she needs to complain to her best friend. So hey, in a sense, maybe Steve Harrington did help their relationship after all—not that she’s about to give him any points for trying.

“Eddie,” she says, grabbing his shoulders. “Steve is a visual learner. I need you to help me demonstrate to him, once and for all, how we have zero chemistry. Whatever the opposite of chemistry is, that’s what we have. Steve needs to learn this, visually, so that he will stop trying to convince me I’m a total catch and can definitely lure you in with my feminine wiles.”

She looks him in the eye and digs her fingers in, just in case he tries to make a run for it. “Eddie. I need you to come back to Scoops.”

[dear-mrs-otome]

Jude Jazza - Fake Lovers Event + Sweet End

(AKA Villainous Love That Unfolds on a Moonless Night but fuck that title it's too long)

I make no guarantees on accuracy. I make no guarantees on seriousness. This is, on multiple occasions, a shitpost in summary form - but I hope you enjoy it anyways.

~~~~~~~~

Our story opens on Kate - her lips hot, her heart pounding - telling Jude that she never wants to be the ‘lover’ of someone like him, ever again.

Jude thanks her sarcastically, before telling her it should have been him turning down someone like her to begin with…and Kate’s in total disbelief, wtf is wrong with me style, at the fact that his cruel smile is kinda doing it for her right now.

Absolutely fucking not, she’s telling herself. IX-NAY, FULL STOP, BAD OVARIES DOWN GIRL.

~~~Rewinddddd~~~

After she’d become the fairy tale writer, Victor had come up with an idea to help Kate get to know the boyos better, her first task. To pick one of the members of the Crown and spend the day as their ‘lover’. She’s like, nani the fuck?? How am I supposed to pick someone for that? But Victor’s clearly evil accounted for this, because he’s got the solution - if she can’t decide, he’ll decide for her. With DARTS.

Already prepared for this, Victor hucks a dart at a target and then immediately turns to her all soberfaced and apologizing. Not feeling that apologetic though because the next moment he’s smiling as he says she might be in for a bumpy road. He leads her to the lounge and goes right up to JUDE, of all people, which has Kate utterly dismayed. He literally managed to pick the WORST person possible, didn’t he?!

Jude is far from pleased at being interrupted, looking up from his paper with bitchface as Victor explains his proposal, and his answer is clear. A flat nope.

Just because she’s a woman, he’s supposed to have her pose as his lover? He doesn’t think she’s got the stomach for it in the first place.

Victor cheerfully tells him he’ll bump up how much money Jude’s getting next month, and Jude’s still far from pleased at the idea but money clearly talks, and with a patented-Jude ‘tch’ and a sneer he turns to Kate. 

Jude: Once we’re outta here, I don’t wanna hear whining anythin’ like ‘I wanna go back’ or ‘I hate this’ or whatever. Promise that and we’re on.

She’s thinking fine fine, she’s come this far already may as well give it a go. She’s gotta take this first task and do it well  so that she can be trusted as a fairytale writer and get out of this castle.

Kate: Yes! I promise!

Jude lets out a sigh like he can’t believe she just said that so enthusiastically, and Roger chimes in looking totally gobsmacked. He warns her that she’s just earned herself a rough go of it, making a promise to Jude - Jude’s deadly serious about keeping promises he’s made, but he expects the same of anyone else, and he’ll exact cruel ruthless revenge on anyone who breaks their word. 

Kate’s all kinds of nervous hearing that now, and when she echoes it she glances over to find Jude with a cruel smile on his face, as if enjoying her fear.

Jude: Don't make promises so easily, Princess. I’m gonna spend the rest of the day teachin' you that.

~~~~~~~~

It takes her only a few minutes to regret her life choices, wishing for nothing more than to go back home already.

Jude and Ellis had told her they were going to work, so she tagged along with them, and it had taken only a brief while before Jude had ducked into an alley off the road and there been accosted by a man with a knife. He jumps out, yelling about how he can’t forgive (a thoroughly unimpressed) Jude for wanting to make the man lose his mansion, his property, everything he has. No matter how much he works he’ll never pay off his debts, the man shouts. His family will be ruined! It’s ALL Jude’s fault!

Jude merely says Ellis’ name, and in a blink Ellis has the man pinned to the ground, disarmed.

Leaving Kate shocked by how fast he moved and how deftly he handled that. 

Jude reminds the man it was HE who broke his contract - if he wants to starve to death paying for a lawsuit he can’t win, go right on ahead. Tossing those words at him all casually as he simply walks by, leaving the man wailing on the ground. 

The dude seems pretty defeated, so Ellis lets go of him and gets up to follow Jude…but Kate is conflicted. Obviously she doesn’t have any clue what sort of deal the guy had with Jude, or how he broke it, but he seems pretty busted up and too pathetic to just leave him lying there in the dirt like this. Feeling bad, she takes out her handkerchief and hands it to the man - but all that ends up doing is enraging him, feeling like he’s being pitied by a girl like her. 

He grabs her leg rather than the kerchief, causing her to squeal and tell the man to let go of her, but he shouts at her for mouthing off to him. 

Just as she’s frozen in fear…a well-polished shoe smashes the man’s face. 

Jude: Don’t just touch something of mine.

Kate’s aghast as she follows the leg attached to the heel still grinding into the man’s face and finds Jude standing there, looking down at the dude and looking pissed. The man manages a few grunts, but that just causes Jude to grin and say how much he’s relishing the man’s miserable expression. Laughing at the sight of the blood running from the agonized man’s nose before turning away.

Kate forces herself to follow Jude, leaving the broken man behind, but she still carefully leaves her handkerchief beside him before she goes.

~~~~~~~~

Though the method might leave something to be desired, she’s gotta admit to herself that Jude protected her, and so she thanks him when they get back out to the street. But Jude just scoffs that she’s a sheltered princess, and tells her he didn’t do it for her. It’s because right now she’s supposed to to be ‘his woman’, and if he lets someone doing something to her slide to her it’ll only cause problems for him - AKA he’s gotta keep up appearances.

She thinks to herself that she’d rather he just accepted her thanks, since he did help her, but she gets why he was so vicious about it at least. And she broaches the subject of the guy, asking what the deal was with him, but all Jude says on the matter is that the guy made promises he couldn’t keep, and now he’s paying for them. 

Jude: Pretty sad, pathetic, and hilarious, innit?

She’s trying to figure out how Jude’s so chill about a dude hating him enough to want to kill him - actually, scratch calm, he looks almost like he’s enjoying the whole thing. Like he’s having fun. And she thinks back to the write-up she’d seen on Jude:

‘Curse: The 13th Fairy. Ruthless, arrogant, and vindictive.’

Sounds spot on, she’s thinking. 

Jude reminds her to watch herself, lest she end up like that dude, because he knows she was just thinking how she wanted to go back home and how she hated all this. (AKA about to break her promise too)

Kate: I might have thought it, but I didn’t SAY it.

Jude: A shame. I went into that alley and put you in danger and everythin'.

Cue Kate like…whaaa? She asks incredulously if he's saying he tried to get her attacked on purpose to make her break her promise?!?

Jude smirks and implies she managed to guess right, which only enrages Kate.

Kate: You’re the worst!

Jude (100% unrepentant and grinning): Why thank you. I’m lookin' forward to finding out just 'ow long that sassy attitude of yours lasts.

~~~~~~~~

She’d assumed saying they were going to work meant an office or something, but instead they bring her to the dockyards. Makes sense though she guesses, when you own a trading company. 

Jude sends Ellis off to prepare for some unspecified ‘thing’ that might happen tonight, and Ellis seems to get what he’s alluding to, bidding Kate a cheerful farewell and leaving her wondering just what they’re talking about and where Ellis is going. Pondering that she follows along after Jude as he moves about the dockyards, giving instructions here and there. He speaks with dock workers and the foreman and she finds herself a seat between crates to watch him as he does. Taking in the way everyone looks at him with a mixture of fear, nervousness, and sometimes hostility - tempered with respect.

He finishes up the conversation, and a friendly young man comes rushing up to Jude, who pulls a face at how loud the man, Jack, is. Jack is delighted that Jude remembers his name, and Kate’s a little surprised to see that someone out there is a Jude fan. 

That’s about when Jack notices her there, and asks who she is.

Jude: Oh, my woman.

Jack’s about to losing his mind over this revelation - holy what?? Bossman’s girlfriend?? And he’s practically shouting, so loud that Kate’s cringing as a sea of eyes turn her way. It freaks her out and she wonders if it’s all in her imagination that she feels like people are all jinxing her.

Jude scowls and says what of it? What if he does have a girlfriend? Jack’s left trying to make excuses and apologize for making a spectacle, until Jude just long-suffering sighs and tells him to get back to work

Felling hella uncomfortable, Kate’s scrunching herself down between the crates and such trying to stay out of sight as much as possible, when she senses Jude’s amusement and looks up.

Jude: Yeah, good, stay small like that. There’s plenty of people who’d kill you just for bein’ my woman.

She asks if he’s meaning to say she might be attacked again like she was before, getting nervous all over again remembering that guy who’d grabbed her leg.

Jude asks if she’s scared, and she starts to say OF COURSE but she stops herself, trying to decide if he’d consider it a complaint if she did. (AKA a violation of her promise)

He snorts at that and steps closer and says of course she’d be terrified - a sheltered, defenseless princess like her? It’ll be a miracle for her to make it home unscathed after all the things that’ll happen to her. 

Only when he finishes does she realize he’s backed her up against the crates, with nowhere else to run - a fact he gleefully points out. He wraps his fingers around her throat and squeezes, not enough to hurt or cut her air off, but tight enough to make her blood run cold. 

Kate: Sto-!

She keeps herself from finishing that too, not willing to tell him to stop and risk breaking her promise. But being unable to resist like that only amps up her fear more.

Jude: If I put just a bit more strength into this hand, you’re never going back to the castle. Alright?

Kate’s thinking NO ACTUALLY THIS IS FAR FROM OKAY?! But she can’t protest so she does the next best thing - glares at him furiously.

Jude lets out a little laugh and says he likes that face, it’s the cutest thing he’s seen all day. He almost feels bad for her, because she clearly wants to go home but can’t say it. If she breaks her promise, he’ll do terrible things to her, no?

He seems amused, clearly seeing right through her fears and conflict, and she wonders if THIS is what he meant when he’d threatened to show her that she shouldn't make promises so easily. But that’s just what she does.

Pissed off now, Kate finds her voice, and furiously she tells him it’s not because she’s afraid of his vengeance that she doesn’t protest. It’s simply because she doesn’t want to give up on earning their trust and earning her freedom.

Jude looks taken aback, as she finishes by telling him that’s why she will keep the promise she made to him.

He clicks his tongue and lets go of her, and the sudden rush of blood to her head makes her dizzy. She staggers and starts to fall, but he grabs her by the upper arm and hauls her roughly back to steady on her feet.

Jude: Can’t have my woman just falling down can I?

She’s fuming to herself about how he’s still quite literally The Worst, when he tells her he’s going to be taking care of some business so she’s on her own for awhile here, and with that he just unceremoniously leaves. And stays gone, for hours…long enough for Kate to be left wishing for home once more as she’s freezing her ass off once night begins to fall. 

The young man from earlier, Jack, approaches her, and she recognizes him. Jack tells her that Jude’s sent for her, and she’s fuming internally at him leaving her along for friggin ever and then summoning her whenever he damn well feels like it…but she forces herself to smile and accepts Jack’s offer to take her to him.

He takes her through the streets to a business warehouse, and inside she sees an unfamiliar man dressed in black with a bowler hat on, and guards surrounding him. 

Bowler Hat Man: Are you Jude Jazza’s girl?

A wary Kate tries to back out, but she’s grabbed by Jack. Appalled, she asks Jack if he’s stabbing Jude in the back, but Jack tells her it’s not betrayal - it was just contracted work, and he’s found a better-paying job. Who wouldn’t take it?

Jack hands her over to the Bowler Hat Man, who evil chuckles over how he figured Kate would make a worthwhile hostage so he’d had her brought in - that man bringing a woman along is something that never happens. Kate asks if by ‘that man’ he means Jude, and the Bowler Hat Man agrees. He tells her how Jude killed a dude who tried sending a woman to seduce Jude for his own gain, and that Jude seems to surprisingly give a shit about ladies. 

Kate’s like uhhh are you sure you’ve got the right person here?? This amuses the Bowler Hat Man a ton, but he says basically that Jude’s got some dirt on him, and he’s going to leverage Kate’s safety in exchange for negotiating.

She asks what’ll happen if Jude refuses, and the Bowler Hat Man simply says too bad so sad, that’ll mean she dies. THAT scares the shit out of her, because she knows there’s no freaking way Jude’s going to negotiate for her. She’s gonna have to figure out how to somehow get out of this all on her own.

Kate tries to tell the guy that she just tagged along with Jude to work today, but Bowler Hat says nah girl you were spotted getting all flirty at the docks today.

Kate: Did that seriously look like we were flirting? He was strangling me!?

Bowler Hat Man says hey, some people are into that kinda thing, and Kate’s about ready to choke at that.  She starts vehemently protesting that she really truly doesn’t have anything to do with that man (Jude), this is all just a huge misunderstanding!

Jude’s voice: What a terrible thing to say about your lover…I’m wounded.

She turns around at the sound of his voice and the thump of something heavy falling to the ground, and sees Jude there walking in past an unconscious guard, tossing out a snarky greeting and an apology for interrupting.

SWEET END

The man in the bowler hat recognizes Jude, and he grabs Kate, wrapping an arm around her tightly and pressing something up against her forehead that she realizes, to her horror, is a pistol.

Jude: Ha, that’s a great look, Kate.

She’s bracing herself for the inevitable moment where Jude says she’s not his lover and he refuses to negotiate, at which point…she’ll be killed. Just the thought has her shaking like a leaf with fear - and Jude seems to be genuinely enjoying the sight of her in terror as he laughs and says how much he likes the frightened look in her eyes. 

He asks if she wants his help, and she’s thinking NO SHIT ISN’T THAT OBVIOUS?

She’s nodding YES desperately, only to be left more and more of a nervous wreck as Jude strings her along, until the Bowler Hat Man is like, so much for a sweet reunion between lovers?

Jude’s a little disappointed he’s got to stop enjoying the sight of Kate in distress and pay attention to the man, but he switches his focus from her to Bowler Hat and states that it seems the guy is using Jude’s warehouse for business other than they’d agreed on. Jude doesn’t give a shit if he wants to use it to sell guns or whatever other nastiness - BUT. They had a contract that specifically said no buying or selling of PEOPLE didn’t they?

Kate’s thinking, holy crap they’re trading in people?

Bowler Hat wants Jude to overlook all that though - after all, he says, even poor people can fetch a good price when sold. It’ll line Jude’s pockets and help clean the filth from London’s shithole excuse for a port.

Jude’s just silent at that, and the guy keeps wheedling - Jude loves other people’s misery, and money, so of course he’d let something like this slide, right?? If Jude agrees to it, he’ll give Kate back unharmed.

She’s summing this all up in her head, that obviously what’s going on here is the guy broke his contract with Jude to use a warehouse he’d rented from him to engage in human trafficking. And now he’s trying to threaten Jude into letting it continue.

The whole thing makes her sick to her stomach, and while she doesn’t WANT to die she can’t wrap her head around sparing herself at the expense of ignoring the awful shit this guy’s up to. 

She could never, ever, do such a horrible thing.

So, biting her lip to hold back her fear, she looks squarely at Jude and puts all her effort into keeping her voice from trembling when she speaks. 

Kate: Jude…that nod earlier? I take it back.

He startles at that before he answers.

Jude: You’re seriously hopeless, you know that?

But her heart skips a beat at the smile he’s wearing when he says it - pitying and dumbfounded, but somehow still gentle. She’s honestly having a hard time believing what she’s seeing.

Slightly warm fuzzy moment all gone though when the smile falls from his face and he says he doesn’t need to be told what to do by her, so quiet down. His eyes are cold when he turns back to Bowler Hat and says there’s a few things the man seems to have misunderstood about him that he’s going to clear up. 

First - that Jude loves other people’s misery and money. What he loves is eating the rich, basically. He loves the despair when the high and mighty, like Bowler Hat, fall from their comfy lap of luxury. 

Bowler Hat has only a moment to be like, wtf? Before the air in the warehouse is torn apart by gunshots and screams, as the guards surrounding Bowler Hat all collapse. He’s so dumbfounded that Jude easily darts in and takes advantage of the distraction to twist his gun arm back. 

Secondly, Jude tells him, is that no matter what kind of leverage someone tries to use against him he’ll never let anyone get away with breaking a contract.

Jude: Third…

He rips Kate away from the man and into his own arms on a sneer.

Jude: Whatever my answer is, I’m gonna be sure to get her back without a scratch.

He drives a knee hard into Bowler Hat’s stomach at that, and the man falls over on the spot. Kate’s still trying to catch up to the fact that Jude’s helped her again…and trying to tell her pounding heart to chill out. It’s most definitely NOT racing over Jude saving her bacon, or because he’s holding her. Absolutely not. Clearly it’s just because she’s scared.

Clearly.

She knows she’s telling herself lies nobody would believe, and in the meantime Jude aims the pistol he stole from Bowler Hat at him and tells him not to worry - he’s not going to turn him over to the police. In return for that, he just asks the man to be the subject for some dangerous research. Jude takes perverse delight in the idea of Bowler Hat experiencing the ‘joys’ of physical labor for the first time.

When the agonized man finally passes out, Jude calls out for Ellis to carry the guy off, and Ellis materializes out of the shadows with his own gun in hand. He observes on a smile that Jude seems pretty pleased right now, which only leads Jude to pull a face and tell Ellis to go get his eyes checked if that’s what he sees, after dropping this dude off at the lab.

Ellis seems a little disappointed, but he does as asked and disappears with Bowler Hat.

Kate asks if the man is going to be killed, and Jude tells her that he accepted this mission on the condition that if he could destroy the human trafficking ring, he alone got to decide whether the target lived or died.

Jude: I don’t see why I should let condescending bastards, living comfy and cushy lives while they exploit others, get off with something as easy as dying. It’s the way of the world that what goes around comes around, and it wouldn’t be fair for them to die before suffering through the same hell, right?

Kate’s still reeling from the revelation that this was all a mission though, and says as much aloud. Jude grimaces at her screeching and says what the heck else would it be?

Kate: So you didn’t come to my rescue because I was kidnapped by accident…

Jude tells her he knew they’d try anything to get him to negotiate with them, so she’d make a natural target if she was seen out and about with him. Kate’s like, wait you KNEW THAT and you left me alone?!

They devolve into arguing, Jude exasperated that she’s gotta pester him with so many obvious questions and Kate still furious that hello?? She might have been KILLED?!

Jude, scoffing: I’d never do anything to get my bait killed.

Kate’s just seeing red over having been used as bait, and she tells Jude, once again, that he is The Worst. Jude’s practically rolling his eyes as he tells her she already used that line earlier, doesn’t she have any new ones? Lighting up a smoke, he walks out of the warehouse - pausing on the way to land a hard parting kick on Jack, who is lying on the ground with the rest of the defeated guards.

~~~~~~~~

Back out at the docks, Kate questions Jude as to the nature of this ‘dangerous research’ he’s going to use that man as a subject for, but he tells her it’ll never have anything to do with her. 

If it’s so dangerous, it seems like it might have serious and permanent effects, and she’s wondering whether Bowler Hat will come seeking revenge on Jude if he survives it. Also remembering with a shudder the hatred in the man’s eyes who threatened Jude with a knife in the alley. She could never stomach living with people constantly hating you and wanting to see you dead.

Kate: The more you torment people, the more they'll just hate you…why do you have to torture them?

Jude just smirks and tells her it’s the price of a delightful hobby, and she asks if it’s really fun enough to risk his life over. He stops at that and turns back towards her, causing Kate to almost crash into him, leaving them almost nose to nose. 

Jude: Can I torment you until you hate me so much you wanna kill me, just to be sure?

Only for him to immediately break out laughing when Kate gasps, and say he’s just fucking with her. Quite pleased with himself at having her at a loss.

He tells her that a sheltered princess would never get it, and she thinks that she doesn’t understand and she doesn’t WANT to understand. 

This man’s a cold-hearted, arrogant, ruthless sadist…but…when he put her in danger today, it was Jude who freed her and kept her safe. If he’d really made that promise to her with ill intent, she’d not have made it through the day unscathed. 

That moment where Jude had promised to spend the day showing her the folly of making promises so lightly comes back to mind again…and she realizes he’d done exactly what he’d said he would and taught her the rules of this dark world she’s stepped into. Maybe because he knows the importance of a promise. 

That doesn’t make showing appreciation any easier to swallow though, leaving her to force herself to thank him for today. 

Jude asks what’s with the surly attitude saying it, would it kill her to smile more? Aaaand Kate’s back to exasperated with this man, but she tells him she learned a lot about the dangers of making promises and that she’ll be more careful next time, all on a smile this time.

Jude snarkily praises that…then grabs her chin with a cold smile, setting her flailing and asking what he’s doing.

Jude: You’ve done a good job of keeping your agreement with Victor and your promise to me…but I saved your life two times today. You owe me twice.

Kate’s in disbelief, even as ruthless amethyst eyes glint at her bewitchingly. Like a cunning predator, toying with its prey. Then Jude smirks and wonders aloud…what exactly should he get in return for saving his ‘sweetheart’?

FIN

(The little scene we get at the start of the story is from the epilogue)

~~~~~~~~

<< Bitter End | Epilogue >> (TBC)

~~~~~~~~

@violettduchess @just-simping-over-genshin

[carpememes]

KLAUS starters

feel free to change pronouns

“Stop, don’t tell me. Let me guess…. I give up. Who are you?”

“Can I get your something to drink? Espresso, cappuccino?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be in equestrian training?”

“No worries, I’ve got someone covering for me.”

“I’m gonna take one last look around the old place so I can forget it.”

“There you have it! But, hey, we gave it the old college try didn’t we?”

“Guess I’ll just go pack up and head home then. Too bad! Darn, oh darn!”

“You’re right! When will I grow up? When will I stop squandering these opportunities- that you so kindly forced me into- and become my own man?”

“I guess I must really hanker down and rethink my priorities.”

“You think I’m just going to watch you purposely fail and then let you waltz right back to a privileged life void of any purpose or meaning?”

“You can’t cheat, bribe or squirm your way out of this one.”

“Thank you, Dad! This is really wonderful, father, thank you so much!”

“I love this terrible coach ride. Thank you so much.”

“Nice boat. Any chance we might actually get on it today?”

“I thought there would be some sort of a reception.”

“This is no way to treat a person. Certainly not THIS person.”

“Come to the counter, I’ll be right out!”

“What kind of town has a Battle Bell?”

“Welcome to _, home ot the world’s finest feuds.”

“Are you gonna buy something, or are you just here to chit-chat?”

“Holy moley, that’s you?! What happened?”

“Mingling with their sworn enemy spawn? Can’t have that!”

“So now I’m reduced to doing this so I can get some money and start fresh far, far away from here.”

“Are. You going. To buy something?!”

“C’mon, sport! I saved the best for last.”

“Go home, you loser!”

“Oh, I get it. Did my father put you up to this?”

“Show me where I’m really staying. I’d like a hot bath and a look at the dinner menu.”

“That’s it! This place is the worst! I’m going home!”

“I hate it here! It’s so cold and icky and the people are mean to me!”

“Nice guy. Loves visitors.

“Hello? I’m in your house.”

“Better alive in the gutter than hacked into pieces! No thank you!”

“Please don’t chop me up and scatter my parts in the woods!”

“In there? What? No way. You must be kidding.”

“Please! Open this! Why are you doing this to me?”

“These better sound sad. Do they sound sad?”

“Probably not an axe murderer. Though, still is a possibility but, most likely, no.”

“Remember me from the nice breaking and entering the other night?”

“That is… totally normal!”

“Centuries of glorious hatred passed down through generations!”

“Now, I just know you didn’t mean to disrespect all of that heritage. Right?”

“Telling children to go to school to learn to write? What is wrong with you?!”

“I’m so close to getting out. I am not about to let you mess it all up.”

“Whatever you’re doing, leave me OUT OF IT.”

“Not a word. You just sit there and be all magical and awesome.”

“Are we going to learn something today?”

“Look, if you have to be here, at least be quiet.”

“Let’s make a deal- If I teach you something will you get out of here? Please?”

“Friends of yours, I take it?… They seemed nice.”

“A flying sleigh… pulled by magical reindeer?”

“Oh look. It CAN laugh.”

“What are you doing at our ambush?”

“So we must band together in peace… To help stop this peace?”

“Back home I’ve got pretty much everything.”

“Back home I’ve got pretty much everything. But here I’m just another irrelevant,pointless… nobody.”“

Hey. You’re a pretty good listener, y’know?”

“How many nights do you lie awake, in the darkest place?”

“If happy lives a mile away, a couple steps is all it takes.”

“If kindness lives in everyone, then all it takes is standing up.”

“Can’t touch it, see it- but you can always feel it.”

“The greatest things you’ll ever know are invisible.”

“How have we never defeated you?”

“We wanted children. Lots of them.”

“We kept waiting, but they never came.”

“Even now, sometimes, it almost like she’s still...”

“After she was gone, I guess I got lost.”

“Yknow what? No homework! Am I the best teacher ever or what?”

“I just thought I’d give the place an update.”

“Check it out, I think it looks pretty good.”

“Someone would have to be pretty stupid to want to leave this place now.”

“Oh, wow. You have no idea what you’ve done, do you?”

“Not quite the same place is it?”

“A true act of good will always sparks another.”

“Everybody’s out to get something, right?”

“Oh, well. Best leave it alone, I say. I’m sure it’s nothing that could fester and eventually become a source of regret.”

“He said he’d never been more proud of me... And he hugged me. Can you believe that?”

“This town was built on resentment and spite.”

“Let’s go. We’re done here.”

“Kids talk. And if kids happen to talk about their parents forming an angry mob then, y’know, teachers listen.”

“Then you showed up and made it complicated, as usual.”

“So all this was for nothing?”

“Shall we then?”

“What did you expect of course she loved me.”

“I’m coming, Love.”

“It was as if he had just... faded away.”

“What happened to him after that... How, why... I can’t even begin to comprehend.”

“I stopped trying to make sense of it a long time ago.”

“What I do know is that, once a year, I get to see my friend.”

[oldcoyote]

thetimesinbetween replied to your post:

(1) please feel free to utterly disregard any/all of this!

(2) i saw this and my heart & soul squeezed because that fucking SUCKS, that breaks my heart, and i want to. like. stuff you in a burlap sack and throw you over my shoulder and take off running. GET OLDCOYOTE OUTTA THERE <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

(3) your brain might be straight-up, like, panicking/sabotaging your happiness in hopes of re-establishing whatever emotional state it has decided is safe. (the vibe: “oh, you’re feeling HAPPY? don’t you know it’s NOT SAFE to be happy? if you’re HAPPY, what NEXT? if you’re HAPPY, then you’re CAPABLE, you’ll have to DO [SOME SCARY THING]. AND you’ll have to do [WHATEVER] and in order to do [THAT THING], you’ll have to BE VULNERABLE.” and so on and so on.)

(4) to be clear, i could absolutely be wrong about this!!! it’s your brain!!! *my* brain loves to do this shit and in my opinion IT IS THE FUCKING WORST.

(5) ok i am currently in a DBT skills group. (this is where me and like 8 other people who are also Severely Struggling and #mentallyill all get together and learn from our 2 intrepid and deeply gay instructors how the fuck to cope, in practical ways, with being alive. and perhaps even. like. build lives we enjoy.) anyway, so, in this group, i learned about a (frankly sort of mindblowing) mechanism called “opposite action.” which is basically a way to decrease the intensity of an emotion.

important caveat: opposite action only really works when (a) you yourself WANT to decrease the intensity of the emotion in the first place, (b) the emotion in question isn’t, like, totally aligned with reality in the first place OR, even if it is aligned with reality, acting on it still wouldn’t help you. (like, imagine this sort of thing: ’ugh it totally makes sense that i feel this way, and it totally makes sense that feeling this way makes me want to do X, but doing X is really REALLY not gonna help me right now, fuuuUUUUUCK.’)

wow. i am not an expert. this is hard to explain. i looked for youtube videos on this for like. half an hour minimum. and they all sucked. YIKES. ✌️sdfsas;kjsasdfs. so, if you are fascinated and/or this seems useful, here is a uhhh fuckin pdf full of charts and bulleted lists: static1.squarespace.com…

if you start on p. 251 of the PDF (“Overview: Changing Emotional Responses”), that should actually properly explain what i’m talking about. I wish I could beam knowledge that I have directly into your brain bc opposite action is very cool actually, and i have done it multiple times and found it helpful, but i am literally linking you to a textbook rn i am so sorry lmao. again please feel free to ignore this :’) <3 <3

(6) in conclusion, absolutely fuck anything sabotaging your joy. you were HAPPY!!! you LOVED doing this thing!!! i want to be like, “i bet you are not stupid actually and also i remember liking your writing, way back when, and i bet it is not bad so THERE,” but like. that doesn’t even matter!!! you could write and then never reread it and never share it, and if it made you enjoy being alive, that’s already Everything.

loving something you are doing while you are doing it…that’s the juicy fucking meat of life!!!!! i am glad you had that & i hope you will have it again & i trust that you will. and just generally i’m rooting for you <3 okay goodnight <3 /end

bless you for all of this, and for the link, i will absolutely check it out and see if it works for me! it sounds SUPER useful and god might be exactly what i need because these emotions are Not Serving Me at all and i want them taken out and shot fjkdls i just want to feel like i used to feel about all this but i don't think that will come until i can write, and publish, and have people read it and be like This Is Not Awful Actually but in order to get there i have to be brave enough to put it out there and I am NOT right now i am a snivelling mess

anything that can help me get out of the snivelling mess stage is more than welcome <3 and beyond that, just, thank you so much for taking the time to say all this it made my day and makes me feel so much better already

[himbosandhardwear]

Sweet Revelation

It's a bonfire afterparty, what's the worst that could happen?

"Says the greatest cocksucker this side of the Mississippi," some guy says loud enough to catch Steve's attention. He's primed for violence even though the statement was said almost fondly.

It's Eddie who responds. "I asked your dad not to kiss and tell!"

Everyone laughs at the response - it's common to hear a 'your Mom' joke, not so much a 'your Dad'- but the guy doesn't laugh it off. He's not pissed but he certainly doesn't think it's funny.

"Ed, you didn't," he says as though horrified and disappointed.

Steve snaps back to Eddie, confused.

He glances back, notices Steve watching and looks away quickly.

"Like I would stoop so low. I know he works the factory line with Wayne. I'd rather fuck a coalminer, at least they make good money."

Blood makes its presence known all throughout Steve's body: fingers, toes, scalp, stomach. Is Eddie saying…

"Good," the first guy says with a glare.

"Gareth's cousin Trevor, on the other hand," Eddie says, which makes Gareth chuck a pack of hotdogs in his direction.

"You complete asshole! He's not allowed to come back after what you two did at Circle K!"

Everyone is laughing. Eddie is gay and it's a joke but it's not at his expense or…or…

"Oh, did Steve not know?" Jeff asks, horrifically bringing attention to whatever look he must have on his face.

He tries to reel it in. "No, but it's cool. I mean, I'm cool."

Eddie's cheek twitches. "Thanks for being cool, Steve."

"Surprised he hasn't tried it on with you, pretty boy," the first guy says, all teasing smiles.

Steve sits up straight in his camping chair. "Oh. Am I pretty?"

There's a beat of silence before everyone laughs at that. He's not sure why that's funny. He's never been called pretty before.

He looks over at Eddie again while the conversation moves on to other things - "Who would win in a fight, three Fresno Nightcrawlers versus one Mothman, and be prepared to defend your answer." - Eddie immediately starts trying to fuck with him, jamming his tongue into his cheek in a pantomime even an idiot like him can parse.

You're a riot, Steve says with eyebrows and pursed lips.

Oh, you don't want me then? Eddie conveys with a mock frown.

Steve laughs him off. But when he looks back at Eddie he's still looking. Somehow Steve gets caught in his stare and can't help but feel like he's trying to convey something he's missed.

Wait, were you serious? Steve asks with a series of facial twitches.

This seems to stump Eddie. He looks away and back again a few times before giving Steve a shrug that says, Why not? No big deal.

Steve feels as though his brain might very well have fled the scene. He watches Eddie nod toward the treeline with a raised brow in question.

He floats out of his chair and follows Eddie toward the woods like some dumb kid in a fairytale. Eddie could murder him so easily right now.

Someone wolf whistles at them, which almost jars him back into his body, but Eddie just laughs, calls out, "Just going to study for a big test on Monday!"

"You're not in school anymore, you idiot!"

He flips the bird without turning around.

Steve follows Eddie about thirty feet or so away from the group, stopping just behind a massive tree, for better coverage. Coverage for what he has no idea.

He turns and gives Steve a once over. "You know, they're gonna think I sucked you off, even if I don't suck you off. You know that, right?"

His stomach vacates his chest, galloping off to wherever his brain went. "Sure."

"So I should probably just do it anyway."

"Totally up to you," he says casually, despite what his dick is screaming.

They stare each other down, both waiting for the other to break first. Gay chicken.

Eddie shrugs, says, "What's a little oral between friends," and drops to his knees in the leaf litter.

[chidoroki]

182 Days of TPN - Day 92

Chapter 92: “Fire Away”

I love how everyone is genuinely impressed (and maybe a bit scared) by Adam’s strength. Also, I know this may not be the best time to wonder about this with all the chaos of the battle going on, but did Emma or Ray never actually hear him mutter Norman’s number? Even when back at the shelter? Granted, the duo were out searching for the Seven Walls majority of the time, but still. Not even one of the other GF kids managed to catch him saying the number out loud? Eh whatever, I dunno why this thought is suddenly coming to me now of all times.

Who is the real beast here, the demon flying through the air or the young mad lad who managed to punch him all the way up there? The kids are totally speechless and ya can’t blame them. Seeing Leuvis get tossed around like a rag doll is quite the sight.

Even Leuvis is overwhelmed by Adam. Poor Palvus could’ve easily avoided this flight if the little guy just let go. Kinda funny how Violet had no idea where Adam came from or when he appeared at GP yet Leuvis figured it in just a couple minutes. Yeah Violet doesn’t know about Lambda (at least I don’t think Emma shared that specific info from the pen with everyone else yet, instead focusing on the battle preparations) but Leuvis can barely see with his blurry vision and that was enough for him to piece it together somehow. Hell, it might not even be due to Adam’s crazy strength or the Lambd mark on his chest, but the fact he’s muttering Norman’s number? And perhaps Leuvis think this is Norman instead? I dunno, I’m having many odd, pointless thoughts so far.. ain’t that fun.

Leuvis must’ve ate a cat at some point since he still managed to land on his feet after taking countless shots midair.

You know it’s a problem when you find the villains relatable.

Ah, here’s the panel of Ray reloading. And Leuvis saying “my dear” is definitely something I don’t remember?? Oh my, this dude could be such a gentleman in literally any other kind of scenario ahhaha.

A fair attempt I suppose but y’all already know how much he is relying on sound now ever since the first flash bomb! That’s how Leuvis managed to take out Pepe! Even Palvus learned from the first mistake and is shielding his own eyes!

Yuugo’s jaw-dropping shot causing some damage outside the panel.

Leuvis is so darn clever bro. All he’s doing is dodging to buy some time before his sight and wounds regenerate and yet he’s still causing the kids to slip up and remain cautious.

How he can still manage to send Adam flying into the building with so much force when he can barely see and with his arm completely busted?? Leuvis is incredible and I really should’ve kept this psycho in my top ten like I originally planned.

Favorite panel/moment:

Okay, all things considered with how beat up Leuvis currently is, it’s insane that he moved fast enough and dealt such a fatal strike to his prime target. On the flip side however, this hurts SO MUCH! AAHH our poor girl!! I was beyond speechless upon reaching this moment for the first time because I had literally no idea how Emma could recover from this. To make matters worse, I distinctly remember when I read these past few chapters one morning and said to myself, “eh, I’ll read one more before I start work,” and lo and behold, this just so happened to be the moment I had to leave off on! Probably the worst kind of cliffhanger.. I was filled with anxiety and my mind was literally racing all day until my lunch break where I could finally see if this precious girl was gonna be okay.

As terrifying and worrisome as this moment is, it’s still one I was looking forward to the most had season two been animated correctly. The shock value alone of seeing the main character be impaled would’ve definitely made all viewers, whether mange reader or anime-only, freak out (myself included. especially if they blasted her “63194” theme here!) Also, would’ve loved to hear all the panic in Ray’s scream.

[memelleity]

klaus sentence starters

❝ letters. you don’t really write many these days, do you? ❞

❝ i give up. who are you? ❞

❝ i’m gonna take one last look around the old place so i can forget it. ❞

❝ it’s been nine months… actually, nine months and six days, but who’s counting? ❞

❝ hey, we gave it the old college try, didn’t we? ❞

❝ stay right where you are. ❞

❝ what is… what’s happening right now? ❞

❝ if you fail to do this, you’re cut off. no more fancy apartments, stagecoach, clothes, galas… all gone. you can look forward to a cozy spot in the gutter. ❞

❝ i’m not lost. ❞

❝ is the weather always like this? ❞

❝ you should see it in the spring. that’s when those grays really pop. ❞

❝ what happened here? ❞

❝ i thought there would be some sort of a reception. ❞

❝ ow, they’re biting! ow, get off! get off! get off! ❞

❝ get me out of here! ❞

❝ don’t you dare raise your voice at me! ❞

❝ this is no way to treat a person! certainly not this person! ❞

❝ whoever’s there, i warn you, you do not want to mess with me, okay? ❞

❝ welcome to ____, home of the world’s finest feuds. ❞

❝ this place is the worst! i’m going home! ❞

❝ you can’t leave, remember? ❞

❝ okay, keep low. don’t panic. don’t panic. ❞

❝ it’s not a letter if it doesn’t have postage. ❞

❝ he’s lying. children are liars. ❞

❝ you may have won this round, but if you think i’m giving up, think again. ❞

❝ is this a bad time? i can see you’re pretty swamped. ❞

❝ don’t you have a job or something? ❞

❝ you’re gonna have to help me with the heavier bags. bad back, don’t you know. ❞

❝ i hate you. ❞

❝ now i can go home with the satisfaction of having accomplished absolutely nothing. ❞

❝ better alive in the gutter than hacked into pieces! ❞

❝ please don’t chop me up and scatter my parts in the woods! ❞

❝ you must be kidding. no way. absolutely not. ❞

❝ why are you doing this to me? ❞

❝ what do you want? money? ❞

❝ you remember me from the nice breaking and entering last night? ❞

❝ that is… totally normal. not a symptom of any mental illness or anything. ❞

❝ think of all the joy you’ll bring their miserable little lives! ❞

❝ what, “same time”? you mean, dead of night? ❞

❝ there’s no need for you to come with me, really. it might be against the law. ❞

❝ i don’t know how it happened. i turned away for one second… ❞

❝ what are we going to do? ❞

❝ this is bad. very bad. worst i’ve ever seen, really. ❞

❝ what were you thinking? ❞

❝ this is tradition! centuries of glorious hatred, passed down through generations! ❞

❝ you really have a way with words, you know? ❞

❝ what is wrong with you? ❞

❝ whatever you’re doing, leave me out of it. ❞

❝ i am so close to getting out. i am not about to let you mess it all up. ❞

❝ forgive me, i’m kind of a dreamer, but… isn’t that why we do it? so we can make a difference? ❞

❝ ah. young love. takes me back, you know? ❞

❝ no one has ever seen him. it’s like he’s invisible or something. ❞

❝ don’t forget to leave out some cookies. ❞

❝ you just sit there, be all magical and awesome. ❞

❝ okay, let’s make a deal. if i teach you something, will you get out of here? please? ❞

❝ can you teach me more? ❞

❝ this is good teamwork here. ❞

❝ trust me. you do not want to be on the naughty list. ❞

❝ did you know that arson is down 70%? ❞

❝ it’s like everyone’s gone mad or something. ❞

❝ a true selfless act always sparks another. ❞

❝ well, look who’s suddenly a chatterbox! tell me, what made you squander all those words into that nugget of wisdom? ❞

❝ i’ve been around long enough to know that everyone is out to get something. ❞

❝ what’s in it for you? ❞

❝ what are you doing at our ambush? ❞

❝ you’re not gonna believe what i saw last night! ❞

❝ say, have you heard the one about the one-legged man who walks into a bar? ❞

❝ can you please get off my porch? you’re trespassing. ❞

❝ oh, forget it. the mood is gone. ❞

❝ i’m saying it’s time to join forces against a common enemy. i’m saying we need a truce. ❞

❝ this is gonna take a lot of work. ❞

❝ work with me here. picture the possibilities. ❞

❝ wait! don’t touch that! ❞

❝ bad night, huh? well, join the club. ❞

❝ what am i supposed to do? stay in this little town forever, surrounded by crazy people, never wanting anything more? ❞

❝ back home, i’ve got pretty much everything. but here, i’m just… another irrelevant, pointless nobody. ❞

❝ hey. you’re a pretty good listener, you know? ❞

❝ who wants some hot cocoa? ❞

❝ i wasn’t smiling. i was squinting. from the sun. ❞

❝ even now… sometimes… it almost feels like she’s still… ❞

❝ i thought i’d never feel this again. and i have you to thank for it, my friend. so… thank you. ❞

❝ you know what? no homework. am i the best teacher ever or what? ❞

❝ how did you pay for this? ❞

❝ let’s, um… let’s talk outside. it’s a little cramped in here. ❞

❝ please, i can explain. ❞

❝ best leave it alone, i say. i’m sure it’s nothing that could fester and eventually become a source of resentment and regret. ❞

❝ i think i may have missed my boat. ❞

❝ so i told him. i told him everything. and then he turned to me, and he said… he’d never been more proud of me. and he hugged me. can you believe that? ❞

❝ i could really use a hand here. ❞

❝ really? you’re gonna go for the guilt trip now? ❞

❝ sure. i’ll tell you what. let’s continue discussing what a horrible person i am while i most likely break my neck trying to save the children’s toys, why don’t we? ❞

❝ we’re dead! we’re dead! we’re dead! ❞

❝ i’m still proud of you, you hear me? ❞

❝ it’s not worth it! are you crazy? ❞

❝ does that mean the feud is back on? ❞

❝ i think you hit your head pretty hard, dear. you should lie back down. ❞

❝ kids talk, you know? ❞

❝ it was a simple plan, but then you showed up and made it complicated. as usual. ❞

❝ so, all this was for nothing? ❞

❝ wake up! you have to see this! ❞

❝ poetic, don’t you think? ❞

❝ any chance for a hot cup of coffee for your neighborhood mailman? ❞

❝ what? you don’t like it? i think it looks good on me, don’t you? ❞

❝ no goodbye. no explanation. nothing. it was as if he had just… faded away. ❞

❝ i stopped trying to make sense of it a long time ago. ❞

[kayte-overmoon]

"Mine for the Holidays" - Chapter 1

Read on Archive of Our Own

Or...

“Steve? You still there?”

Dustin’s voice is tinny through the speaker of Steve’s phone—the same one he’s had since he started college, the one that had fallen in several puddles and no fewer than two toilets in the seven years it’s been in his care.

He made a lot of questionable decisions while he was in school, alright?

The worst one was probably actually going to school in the first place.

“Steve?”

“Yeah—yeah, man, I’m here.”

“Well?” Dustin prompts, his voice closer to the receiver now. He sounds less far away, but anything from Steve’s phone sounds like it’s being beamed to the future from the 80s. “What do you think?”

Steve sighs and throws his keys in the little bowl on the table by the door. “What am I supposed to think?”

“I dunno,” Dustin says, in all his 21-year-old wisdom. “Maybe you should think about stopping her? I mean, you’ve still got the hots for her, right?”

“Henderson,” Steve sighs. Suddenly there’s a pounding behind his eyes, a headache so intense he has to pinch the bridge of his nose. He’s sure it’ll go away the second he hangs up. The kids have always had that effect on him. “I do not have the hots for my ex-girlfriend I broke up with three years ago. I’m over it. Nance and I are friends now. I’m… happy for her.”

“But Steeeve. It’s Nancy. Nancy Wheeler. As in Steve-and-Nancy? You guys were totally endgame. You can’t let her marry some other guy!”

Steve scoffs and toes off his white New Balances, which may or may not have gotten pissed on today. By a dog, of course. One of the dogs at the vet clinic he works at. Not—not from anything else.

“First of all,” he tells Dustin while shrugging off his coat. “It’s not just some guy. It’s Jonathan Byers. We all grew up together. The guy was a bit of a basket case at first, but he grew up fine. I’m sure he and Nancy are great together. It doesn’t always work out the way it does on TV, alright? This isn’t, like, Gilmore Girls, or whatever.”

“For the record, the main girl doesn’t even end up with the guy you want her to in Gilmore Girls. Bad example, man.”

“You would know an obnoxious amount about a cheesy, girly sit-com from the early-2000s.”

Dustin cries out in indignation. “You brought it up!”

Steve just laughs. Dustin has always been easy to rile up. That’s something that never changed about him, even when he hit adulthood. Sweet, gullible Henderson.

Once he’s recovered from the jab, Dustin goes on. “So you’re still coming? To the Christmas party, I mean.”

“Of course, I am,” Steve says without hesitation. “Look, Nancy getting engaged doesn’t change the fact that I want to come home and terrorize all you stinkers like I always do. You’re my family. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Dustin makes some soft, endeared noise on the other end that Steve tunes out so he doesn’t start getting emotional. He turns his attention instead to the crate in the corner of his living room, the wet nose sticking through the grate, the little whines spilling from inside. He smiles.

By the time Steve crosses his living room to undo the latch on the crate, Dustin has moved on to ask, “So it’s not going to be weird for you?”

“No, it’s not gonna be—Scout!” Steve cries out.

The phone goes flying from his hand as sixty pounds of love and fur bowls him over and starts licking him all over.

Scout, his three-year-old black lab mix, throws his weight onto Steve and smothers the ever-loving shit out of him like he hadn’t seen him four hours ago when Steve came to let him out on his lunch break.

“Hi buddy, hi!” Steve coos, tilting his chin to keep the dog’s tongue out of his mouth. Scout doesn’t seem to mind, soaking his chin with slobber instead. “I missed you too!”

After a moment, Steve manages to get the dog off him and climb back to his feet. Scout circles him, panting happily, his blue-white eyes fixated on Steve like he has all the answers in the universe. Steve can’t help but bend down to scratch his ears. “Good boy. Let’s go outside, yeah?” The lab’s ears perk up, his tail wagging faster behind him. “Yeah, let’s go outside.”

Scout dashes toward the back door. Steve chuckles as he does, then bends to pick up his phone. “Sorry about that.”

“Never be sorry about letting me hear the Scout voice,” Dustin says, not even trying to smother his laughter. “Seriously man. That’s adorable.”

“Shut up.” Steve feels his face get hot as he follows his dog to the door in the kitchen. He unlocks it and lets the dog slip outside, watching him from the window as he runs a circle around his duplex’s fenced-in yard before doing his business. “But no, no it’s not gonna be weird. I’m a grown-up, Dustin, as hard as that is for you to believe.”

“Okay, okay,” Dustin acquiesces. Knowing him, he’s only done for now. Steve guarantees the next time they talk, the younger man will bring it up again. He never knows when to let things go. “How was work?”

Steve grins, glad for the change in subject. “It was great. One of our long-term residents got adopted today by this sweet older couple.”

“Aww,” Dustin coos. “Cat or dog?”

“Bird, actually.”

“Wait, your pound has birds?”

“It’s a humane society, thank you,” Steve corrects. “And yes, we do. We care for all legal pets. Just not, like, deer or raccoons.”

“You can have a pet raccoon?”

Steve rolls his eyes. “Don’t go getting any ideas, Henderson.” The younger man grumbles down the line, clearly having been caught. “How about you? How’s school?”

“Great!” Dustin chirps. “Suzie and I have decided to get a place together next school year, so we don’t have to keep crashing on each other’s couches.”

“Wow.” Something pulls in Steve’s chest. He realizes, suddenly, that he’s jealous of Dustin. Of Dustin, of all people. The gangly, dorky, socially questionable computer science major with the reformed Mormon girlfriend. The second the feeling hits him, he buries it to be dealt with later. Now, he decides to be happy for his friend. “That’s great, man! I’m glad you two are getting serious. But aren’t her parents, like, completely against the whole living in sin thing?”

Dustin makes a noise on the other end that is neither a “yes” or a “no.” “I think the fact that she’s with me in the first place is enough of a middle finger for them to be kinda numb to anything she does from now on. She could go home for the holidays six months pregnant with piercings and face tattoos and they wouldn’t really bat an eye. She’s officially the black sheep of the family.”

Steve winces. “Sorry I brought it up.”

“Don’t be.” Dustin laughs softly. “We’re used to it by now. I think they finally realized she wasn’t going to be their perfect Latter Day Saint of a daughter when they got the invitation to her Methodist baptism.”

“I’m not even going to ask what that is.”

“Yeah, better not. I’m not even sure I understand it, and she’s my fiancée.”

Steve freezes.

Scout noses at the door, ready to be let in, but Steve doesn’t see him.

“Your—your what?”

Dustin is uncharacteristically silent.

“Henderson.” Steve leans against his kitchen counter, feeling like the breath has been knocked out of him. “Are you and Suzie engaged, too?”

“Um… kind of?”

“How the hell can you be kind of engaged?”

“I mean—” Dustin sputters, pulling for an excuse. “It’s not like, official, you know? I mean, I have a ring, and we’ve talked about it. We both know it’s happening, but she just doesn’t know when. Like, we’re essentially married in the eyes of God, or whatever.”

On reflex, Steve says, “Gross.”

Dustin snorts softly. “Okay, weirdo.”

“I’m—I’m happy for you, man. Both of you. Really. That’s—that’s like, real adult shit.”

“Yeah,” the younger man agrees. “It is. The ring cost me like three months’ paychecks, so it better be real adult.”

Steve whistles lowly.

“I know, right?” Dustin sighs. “I couldn’t justify spending just a couple hundred bucks on a ring for the most perfect woman in the world.”

The dreamy tone in his voice makes that feeling stir up in Steve again. The joke he was about to make dies on his tongue. “Congrats,” he chokes out. Scout scratches at the door again, so Steve shakes himself from his one-man pity party and lets the dog back in. “Really, man. I’m so proud of you.”

Dustin waves him off, and the phone call ends shortly after that.

Steve stares into space after he hangs up, Scout licking his fingers softly.

Henderson’s getting married?

Nancy’s getting married?

Is Steve the only one spending his nights watching bad reality TV and talking shit about the contestants to his dog, or, on the better nights, Robin?

The second he thinks of her, the phone is back in his hand. She answers his call after a few short rings. “Buckley speaking.”

“Come over?”

She pauses. He made no effort to hide the ragged tone of his voice, and she can read him easier than a picture book. “Is this a wine night, or just an ice cream night?”

Steve closes his eyes, letting Scout nose his hand until he’s scratching his velvety ears. “Both.”

“So let me get this straight.”

Robin Buckley faces Steve from the other end of his couch, her legs tangled with his under the ancient afghan he inherited from his late grandmother, a pint of cherry cordial ice cream in one hand, a spoon in the other.

“Not only is this mysterious ex I’ve never even seen a picture of getting married,” she says, waving the spoon around like she’s painting the picture for him. “She’s also bringing the fiancé to your fancy, found-family Christmas dinner. And your best friend—pardon me, your other best friend—” She gives him a meaningful look that has him rolling his eyes and diving back into his tub of mint chocolate chip. “—is getting married too and only told you on accident?”

Steve grimaces. “Yeah, that’s pretty much it.”

“Jesus, dude.”

He nods in agreement.

“Christ,” Robin continues. She reaches out to the coffee table where their discarded wine glasses sit, grabs one, and shoves it at Steve, who takes it willingly.

“I mean.” Steve cuts himself off to take a swig of the cheap rosé Robin brought with her. “I’m sure he was gonna tell me, you know? Like, it’s not official or anything. But he bought a ring. He said they’re both on the same page and she’s expecting it. And they’re moving in together. But still, I thought when Henderson finally made a move, he’d at least talk to me about it, you know?”

Robin nods along, following him intently while shoveling ice cream into her mouth. That’s one of the things he loves most about her: she’s an active listener. She makes him feel heard. “Kinda shitty of him,” she agrees. “I mean, it wasn’t official yet, so I kind of understand, but like, you’ve been friends since you were, what, twelve?”

“He was twelve. I was sixteen.”

“Still! That’s almost ten whole years, Steve.”

Steve frowns into his now-empty wine glass. “I know.”

“And what about the ex? Norma?”

“Nancy.” He rolls his eyes. She’s joking, of course, trying to lighten his mood. It helps, against all odds. “I’m happy for her.”

Robin’s spoon freezes halfway toward her mouth.

Steve groans and slips down further in his seat, kicking Robin in the process. “Why doesn’t anyone believe me when I say that?”

“Because you almost bought a ring, Steve. You told me she was the only person you’ve ever seen yourself growing old with.”

“Yeah, well.” He stabs at a chunk of chocolate in his ice cream. “Now when I picture being old, you’re in the rocking chair beside mine, pinching nurse’s asses when they walk by.”

Robin gasps, affronted, and clutches her chest. “Excuse you! I’m going to be a fantastic old woman. I already have my wardrobe picked out.”

“That explains all the argyle sweater vests. Ow!” He jerks his legs back when Robin starts kicking him. “Okay, uncle! Uncle!”

“You’re such a dick!” she cries, but she’s grinning at him. “I’m trying to be sincere here.”

“I know. Thanks.” He takes a deep breath. “Anything I felt for Nancy isn’t there anymore. I mean, it’s going to be awkward as hell, especially considering I beat up her fiancé a couple times when we were in school.”

“Uhhhh…” Robin’s eyes widen to twice their normal size. “You conveniently left that part out.”

He winces. “You can understand why. I’m not… proud of who I was in high school. That’s part of the reason Nancy and I didn’t work out. She fell in love with King Steve, the guy who didn’t take shit from anyone. And I’m not… I’m not him anymore.”

“Good.” The heat in Robin’s voice makes him meet her eye again. “I would’ve hated that guy.”

Steve snorts. “Yeah, you would’ve. I probably would have made fun of you.”

“For being…” She lowers her voice dramatically. “Gay?”

He throws a pillow at her as she cackles. “Yeah, because you’re gay. All that internalized homophobia really turned me into a special kind of monster.”

She tilts her head, leveling him with a look that’s both patronizing and sympathetic. “You were a kid, Steve. Don’t be so hard on that guy. It’s not like you grew up in the most affirming household.”

“That’s an understatement.”

Robin was there with him, after all, when he went to the bank at the age of 22 to open his first bank account when his parents cut him off. She held his hand when he applied for a credit card and stood beside him when he signed his first lease. She’d been there every step of the way, from the moment he whispered, shaking and terrified out of his mind one summer night, “I think I might be bisexual.” All the way to now, three years past dropping out of school, ending his relationship with Nancy, coming out, and losing contact with his biological family.

The Harringtons are a traditional bunch, to say the least. He hasn’t heard from them in three years beyond the Christmas card his mom sends each year.

“So it’s not going to be weird?” Robin prods softly. “With Nancy and what’s-his-face?”

“Jonathan. It might be weird. I’m gonna apologize as soon as I can. To both of them.”

“Honey, you don’t owe them anything.”

“No, I want to do it. To clear my own conscience.” He sighs and puts the ice cream on the coffee table. He’s suddenly nauseated. Scout, who had until that point been napping on the floor right under Steve, sticks his nose up, politely asking for attention. Steve smiles and drops a hand to scratch the dog’s chin. “Besides, I’m kind of stuck with them. Or, they’re stuck with me, I guess. She’s Mike’s sister, and Jonathan is a Byers.”

“Like, of the Will and Mama J variety?”

Steve grins. “Yes, that brand. He’s Will’s older brother.”

“God-damn,” Robin says softly. “So, the found family isn’t afraid to inter-mingle.”

“Ew, don’t say it like that!”

“Sorry, I said it before I thought it through.”

Steve rolls his eyes at her.

“What if… no, never mind. Forget I said anything!”

He looks at her curiously, still scratching Scout. She’s avoiding his gaze, picking at a spot in the afghan that suddenly caught her attention. “What were you going to say?”

“Nothing!” Which, to translate from Robin-English to plain English, means she was about to say some outlandish bullshit that would never cross the mind of your average human.

“Spill, Buckley.”

She purses her lips, thinking it over, then sits up to put her ice cream on the table as well. Steve mirrors her, sitting upright and folding his legs under himself so they’re facing each other, crisscross applesauce. Her hands lace together, her face going stony; she looks like she’s about to make a million-dollar business proposition. “So, you’re insecure about where you are, romantically.”

“Um, ouch?”

“I’m not trying to insult you. I’m merely stating the facts.”

He crosses his arms. He’s not pouting, but he’s close to it. “Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.”

“I’ll apologize for hurting your feelings later.”

Steve scoffs and motions her to continue.

“Right. So, you need to make sure people know you’re okay with the whole Nancy Byers thing. And the last time we got drunk together, you told me you worry that people pity you because you’re 25 and single—which, by the way, is one of the stupidest things you’ve ever said to me. First of all, I also am 25 and single? So, fuck you. Second of all, you’re 25, not dead. You’ve got so much time to be young and hot and single before the biological clock starts ticking down your demise.”

“Do you have a point or are you just going to continue making me feel bad?”

“Gah!” She shakes out her hands then reaches for him, making him uncross his arms so she can hold his hands. “Steve, you need to make them know you’re happy with your life. So… what if you bring someone to the Christmas dinner?”

He blinks at her a few times. “Someone?”

“You know, a special someone.” Then she winks—twice, as if he didn’t get it the first time.

“Robin.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m literally single? That’s kind of the issue here.”

“I know!” She jostles their joined hands. “But that’s easily remedied. You’ve just gotta find someone you can see yourself… you know, bonding with.”

He looks down at where her hands are trapping his. “Rob, the kids know you’re gay. Besides, I don’t think I’m you’re type. A little too tall, I think.”

“Ew, no!” She throws his hands back at him, wiping her own dramatically on the couch. “I mean, find someone from work or something! There has to be someone who would be willing to do it. I mean, who would pass up a chance to be the lucky guy—or gal—on the arm of Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington for the holidays?”

“Uh, given my dating record since coming out, everyone?”

“Okay, first, that guy at Rachel’s party was definitely into you and you were totally oblivious.”

“He was almost 50!”

“And?”

“There is no way I’m bringing home a man almost as old as my father for the holidays.”

“Boo, you’re no fun.”

“Great talk, Buckley.”

“There’s no one else?” she prods.

He squints at her. “Not unless there’s something you know that I don’t.”

She watches him for a moment longer before shrugging and snatching up her ice cream again. “Guess not! Wanna watch the new season of Love is Blind?”

Of fucking course he does.

[brokenmug]

13th June...

I don't know what to write anymore. It's like, a millionth ending... And it feels just weird to be writing about this at all now.

But I guess it's one last month, and I'm really letting you go this time. Why? What's different this time? It's because you broke not my ego, not my arrogance, but my confidence and my trust that I had been keeping all those years, despite totally believing it to be the fault of both of us, that ultimately separated us forever. Yes including mine. I always thought of you. Believing you would come back. But you didn't. As I believed then, and I believe now, you lied. I don't want to blame you, I don't want to put you down, I don't want to hate you; you'd be the last person I would do that to, AQ. But that's what you've always shown me. I kept telling myself that I could have misunderstood, you could have your reasons of doing what you did, even the lie of getting married, which didn't happen for ages after that. I have often said it to myself, and I'm sure I have said it to you as well, that you have broken my ego one too many times. Yes, I let it break, whenever it came, because it was not worth keeping you away. Nothing was ever above you - sometimes not even my self-respect, something I never ever compromise on. I forgave you, AQ. Too many times. Even when you married!!!!!!!!!

For years I told myself to let go because I believed it would be WRONG for me to see you, talk to you, even think of you! You know that! Years later, I would talk only to express my condolences, my sincere feelings for your dad. That's how we started again, much to my surprise. Because I never expected that. I did not! Despite thinking about you all those years, especially the end of previous year and the following months, I made a promise that I would always, always love you and wait for you! But I broke that promise myself over what I would hear - something I told you too, and that would really hurt me for a long time. So I never expected you to continue talking to me, let alone talk about our old days!!!! Why would you do that???? And you do the worst: you make me hopeful again!!!!!! And then break that hope again!!!!!

You know I should hate you AQ! I should! And you tell me even worst things: you reveal to me how everything was a lie by saying how you and your family were looking for potential partners when we were apart!!!! Could you have not teared my heart apart instead????? Is this something to say???? And then you don't even ask me if I were thinking about you!!!! And you go on with whatever stupid decisions are taken - it's what your DAD SAID that you told me!!!!

AQ, this is where it ends. This last thing, the last thing I mentioned is where I was hurt the most, and yet tried to ignore that part, telling myself that you probably realized the grave mistake of your life by giving me hopes again... Again, and again, and again in these 6 months that we talked... But I was wrong. And I decided, I finally decided. It's been about 50 days or something we haven't talked... Because that's how I ended the conversation last time... I wouldn't lie, it was partly intended to see your response, that you would say something, at least ask something... And in some parallel universe, somehow, maybe even try to stop me... But you didn't AQ.

In these last few weeks, I have been thinking about you a lot. But these are the last. When we met last year, and started talking, and meeting, I thought my 2023 would be entirely different from my past. I was wrong. The same things are happening which happened 10 years ago. And I won't let it be so, not the rest of the year... And not because I don't love you, not because I have some new motivation or awakening inside me to realize something I didn't before. But because, you have broken my trust in you, broken my confidence in my love, broken the strength of my feelings. You have broken me one too many times AQ... One month, and I'm gonna sort everything I ever had of you... And even if I can't out of any procrastination or something, I will erase every memory that can be erased which I can. Just when 16 July ends, you'd be gone AQ.

I hardly ever cry, I almost never cry AQ. But I have cried for you a thousand times, no, a million times. That's how strong my feelings were, that's how deep we together went into that ocean, somehow where I only stayed and I didn't realize when you left. Two days ago I was doing the same, at this hour, reading older writings on this very blog. And I had to write all of this. Tonight, I was checking the stories I had shared on Instagram this year to understand what happened, how and for how long. I just wanted to see patterns. And it was no different than what it was YEARS ago! Decade ago! You come and you go, you come, and you go, and this never stops... Never. Until now. Except that one time when we separated - which was actually due to us not being physically bound to one place, our uni anymore - I never actually let go of you. It was always you who did. And it doesn't even matter if you'd deny that, because you have always denied that and I'm not lying either, so I believe in what I just said. But this time, I'm letting you go for the second, and the last time. And THAT'S how, it's different this time. I won't let you be in my life even if you came back. No, AQ. I can break all my egos, my principles, my passions for you, and I did. I even let my self-respect aside by saying that self-respect and true love go side by side, and that they cannot be apart. But that's when love is reciprocated, and believed in. You never did, so what's all the fuss? Self-respect cannot be hurt again and again, even when one person truly loves the other. I cannot let you be in my life anymore, even if you came back burning the ships behind you. A part of me tells me I should hate you AQ, but I have truly loved you and there's a part in me that I know will never stop loving you either. Even though there will always be a soft corner for you, it's useless to say that I might melt if you would plead and accept all the wrongs, because that's not happening any day. Never. I don't see that happening and I can't know what I would do then. But, you lost me AQ. You could have treated me right, and you'd always have my back and my shoulder if you were to ever come back. But no, AQ... I can't be made hopeful and be hurt like that again and again. It's been too long for that. And so is this writing. I have said everything, and have said things in the past. I doubt there's anything important I have missed. These are all my feelings, for someone I truly loved.

A few weeks, and it will be over. And I really don't seem to care right now how you move forward with your life. I should be indifferent too. I don't think I'll write again before that day comes. And don't talk to me, don't text me. I don't wish to come back writing here again and I wish this to really end.

Typing all this for 46 minutes, in my phone, even when you're not there on the other side to respond... Have you, ever?

Finally, I have always wanted you to somehow come across my blog and read it, except this time. I really don't want you to read this anymore, because I don't want you to see how I expected or expect of you in any way from now on. Also, what's love if you have to ask for it?

[your-hotdog-husband]

3:45 am: I'm shopping the Safeway app for gluten free foods after taking my ambien. This is always the worst time for me to be on my phone. I heard recently that gorillas at the zoo get so fixated on people's smart phones that it's become disruptive to the whole... "gorilla experience." Signs have been put up in some cases, asking patrons to please leave their phones in their pockets. They should lend (well, rent, realistically) camera lens attachments that allow you to hide your phone while taking pictures. IDK how this idea really could be executed. This is the worst time of night for me to be on tumblr. What is likely to be even more disruptive for some folks is the metal detector being proposed for San Diego Zoo's Gorilla World exhibit.

My wife is snoring like a... hound with allergies and sleep apnea. So... I'm gonna raid the kitchen. I left a slice of gluten free pizza in the toaster this morning. The crust was too soggy, even though I baked it almost perfectly. I'll either check the instructions or try using a grate or whatever on top of the bacon sheet. I know I said bacon. We rarely rarely eat bacon. We don't keep any in the fridge. We'd end up finishing it before the week is over. But now I'm thinking about a bacon sheet. We'd cook our six slices in the morning for breakfast or brunch, and then use the grease for baking something. How about... quesadillas? Pizza. Grilled cheese sandwiches. Oh, chicken! Right? Add it when grilling some lean hamburger patties. See, this is what happens. Around 2:30 am, an app should lock up my phone until I've had at least 7 hours total of solid, real sleep. Or it's 9am, whichever comes second. I really shouldn't be on my phone at this hour. I really am liable to say anything. Well, I've never turned nazi, and I've done this quite a lot over the last couple years. I wonder how many people fancy themselves having absolutely no nazi qualities, but once you pump them with ambien (zolpidem, generic), they throw around racist epithets, talk about elective enthnic cleansing for parents-to-be. Neuro-conforming, blond haired, blue eyed babies, tall and muscular, smart but not too smart. Well, I'm talking about it. I don't like it. I'm against it. I'm only bringing it up to illustrate how creepy it is. See, if you make your white clone army too smart, they might overcome their nazi indoctrination. Especially the women. I'm not being sexist. I'm a man, and most of my best friends are men. See, I'm mentioning sexism only in context of not engaging in it. See, there are inherent differences in humans due to differences in testosterone levels. It's not so much that testosterone makes us stupider, it just makes us more suggestable when we are amorous and after experiencing sexual pleasure, and for much of the time in between, as long as one isn't amorous for too many hours, in which case we become too irritable and distractable to influence. We're more likely to fumble about and break things in a desperate attempt to do something productive in the garage, kitchen, or office. Or we'll be in the bathroom with the door closed for a while, trying to remember the hair and style of a classmate in 12th grade, along with any of their unusual facial expressions, particularly involving their lips and closed eyes. Oh, don't forget the tongue. She (or he) always let their innocent facade slip. But only to be funny, but then again not that funny. The humorous delivery was just an excuse for an awkward double-entendre, still out of character with her good girl style. I wonder what kinds of guys she hooked up with at City College. I hope they weren't all douchy. Maybe she stuck to good Christian boys at campus fellowship, or from Bible camp. Did they make out in the boating shack? Go to third base or 3½ in the back room of the nature center?

I'm quite peckish after looking at sausages and many other foods on my phone. My wife's done snoring, bad timing as always. I hope the one sad little slice of pizza does the trick. I'm out of lunch meat.

[areyouafraid]

im really gonna crack up man like im really gonna lose my shit one of these days.

ive sent application after application to all these different dumps for the last 3 months and none of them have come back. none of them pay more than maybe 15 an hour at best. and this fucking freelance thing i just tried to look into to at least supplement me with a form of income while i look for a job is a total shitshoot its garbage i flat out dont even know if i can do it. im 19 right now im lucky im not like fucking paying rent or anything. but i sure will have to eventually! it's bad enough i feel like a fuckup who can't keep a job after i got fired from my last dump but like. only so much time

virtually all of my family and friends age 20 - 30 live in fucking dumpy little tenement apartments and those are the ones who can even get places of their own. dont know if i even know anyone who makes more than like maybe 30K a year. and i think we're still the lucky ones. my parents got a 3 bedroom house back in 2001 and i live with them. but i cant live here forever, like financially socially emotionally thats just not... feasible for me. i think they said a little over 11% of americans live under the poverty line? and then there's a study that says america has the worst poverty rate out of 26 "developed" nations. this country is a fucking sick little joke. an empire built off of genocide that brutalizes the rest of the world while its citizens rot in the streets. a twisting labyrinth of dead-end jobs and unwalkable cities with nothing to do but toil and die. what is new york city if not a giant factory town? and this does not even cover one one-eighth of what is wrong with this stupid shitshow of a country

and whatever i know i should just be grateful for what i have (what do i have?) and i know it's a common sentiment among poor / impoverished people to be like well you just need to hustle harder well this is just how it is etc etc but like just what an absurd fucking way to think like you guys are fucking high. people shouldn't live like this. people can't live like this. it's not sustainable. it's not realistic. we have to have a right to shelter and food and literally at the bare minimum to fucking survive like... i mean for fuck's sake there are wild dogs who live in tiny rock dens smeared with their own shit and blood who still have a better quality of life than human beings in our beautiful utopian capitalist society. at least ants and wolves look out for each other. what happens when you fall sick or become homeless in america? what happens if you don't have enough money in america?

with every new day i feel more and more like anything resembling a fulfilling life is just not possible here. i don't know where else i would go. i know travel is expensive. idk i just like. i know this is my home and it does feel like a cop-out but i can't live like this. nobody can live like this. fuuuuck this. honest to christ even if north korea was actually one quarter as bad as US propaganda says it is that would be better than this. at least under the Cold Cruel Hand of Communism i'd have something to fall back on. i'd be insured and have a place to live. what do we have in capitalist america? a weak nod of acknowledgement? and you know what my least favorite part of "patriotic" american bullshit is? if this is really the "best country on earth" we might as well just start organizing mass suicides.

and now with senile old fuck biden regurgitating israeli propaganda and encouraging the senseless murder of palestinians i just think. and this is the guy democrats wanted. this is the guy that republicans were shitting themselves over telling themselves he'd turn america communist or whatever. god if youre still even taking calls from this fucking tragedy of a planet i hope some sort of incurable and highly infectious plague breaks out inside the white house and all of those stupid fucks end up with abscesses forming inside their brains. it might not fix anything but it'd take some of those perverted vultures off the face of the earth so it'd be a nice pick-me-up at least. UGHHHHHHHHHH

[hotwings0203]

Idk what this is but the thought of you being scared of Bakugos quirk is so hot to me

Tw:noncon, predatory behavior

“I swear he’s getting to be more and more like a villain every time I see him,” you giggle with Mina as you two walk out of the class. Bakugo had yet again exploded at one of your shared teachers for correcting him in his pronunciation of a word, and as usual it was quite a scene to behold. Chairs were almost thrown, his friends had to hold him back from leaping up while others egged him on, itching for amusement in their mind-numbingly dull class.

“Maybe Shigaraki was right,” your pink-haired friend snorts and you both collapse in wheezes, clawing and slapping at each other’s shoulders as the ludicrous image of Shigaraki being unable to reign in Bakugo comes to mind.

“Hey ladies, what’re you two laughing about?” A lilting and charming voice comes right at your ear, and you turn to see Denki, Kirishima and…Bakugo walking next to you.

Just because of his proximity and how you were literally just talking about him two seconds ago, you jump away from Bakugo’s glowering face and not so subtly hide behind Mina in a half playful jest.

“Huh? Whatcha ya jumpin’ around for?” Kirishima laughs and you exchange an embarrassed look with Mina.

“Oh nothing, we were just talking about how Bakugo’s quirk is totally villainous. We’re lucky he’s on our side,” Mina singsongs, but you slap her arm in alarm.

And well placed alarm at that, because Bakugo’s scowl deepens as he turns his head to you in a death-glare. You swallow hard seeing his expression and try to nervously laugh.

“But, uh, we were just joking. Right Mina?” You give her a pointed look and she deflects it happily.

“Nope! At least you weren’t, you’re half scared to death of him, isn’t that right Y/N?”

Denki interrupts before you can sputter in horror.

“Honestly, who isn’t scared of this dude?” He claps the other blond on his back and yelps when Bakugo’s hands start curling with smoke.

“Watch it dumbass.” He cranes his head to meet your eyes, but when he finds that you’re still avoiding eye contact with him he starts moving around his friends to better talk to you.

“My quirk isn’t that scary you idiot. It’s not like I care enough about any of you to blow you up-“

But with the smoke still curling form his hands and with the permanently intimidating scowl on his face reading closer and close to your, you can’t help but squeal and scrabble around him to sink your nails into Kirishima’s shoulders for protection.

“Okay, I get it! You don’t have to come any closer, I can see fine from here.” Your voice comes out too high and strained to be deemed as joking, but nonetheless everyone laughs at your dramatic show.

Everyone but Katsuki. Because he can see you’re actually scared, he’s seen it a hundred times on civilians who try to pretend they’re fine but still have that panicked glint in their eye.

“Jesus Y/N, with a reaction like that maybe he really is a villain. Bakubro, want us to send you back to Shigaraki’s place? Maybe you should reconsider his offer.”

And finally at Denki’s quip everyone including you this time laughs again in playful agreement, but yet again Bakugo’s blood starts simmering further.

Why the fuck were you being so obnoxious? He didn’t do anything to you before, right? So why the hell were you embarrassing him in front of all his friends and making him out to be this bloodthirsty monster?

Well, whatever. If a monster is what you want, then a monster is what you’ll get.

And so he waits for you after school, trailing behind you a couple hundred feet yet still keeping you in sight. He curses when you giggle with your friends, no doubt in his mind that you’re still throwing dirt on his name and he swears under his breath when you talk to Deku and his dweeb friends.

Of course when you hang around ditzy dorks like Deku he’s gonna look like a psycho in comparison.

But at one point you’re by the vending machine alone in a deserted hallway, fumbling with your coins and trying to quickly get a soda before your friends up ahead leave.

Too bad for you, because when he’s done with you they’ll never want to be seen with you again for their own safety.

You’re shoving money in the slot when he silently walks up a couple feet behind you.

“No friends around to gossip about me?”

You shriek and jump a good foot in the air at the sudden voice behind you. Clutching your heaving chest, you whirl around to see who it is.

Your blood runs cold. It’s Katsuki Bakugo, the absolute last person you want to be alone with in a deserted hallway.

Your feet move a step back.

Wrong move.

His nostrils flare and his eyes widen at your insulting retreat. You know he doesn’t take kindly to it, but with an expression like that how could you not?

“Uh, w-what do you mean?” You chuckle nervously.

He doesn’t laugh. In fact, he does something worse.

He matches your steps and moves forward a little bit.

At this you fully take a stride backwards and clash with the vending machine behind you.

He keeps advancing, slowly getting closer and checking you out, his head tilted as his eyes roam up and down your vulnerable body.

“Don’t move back. Why the fuck did you move away from me? That’s rude, we were just having a normal conversation.”

You surprise yourself by sounding level-headed in retaliation. “‘Kinda hard not to be a little uncomfortable when your conversation sounds so accusing.”

He lunges forward and you actually scream this time, throwing your hands up above your head in instinct to protect yourself from his proximity.

Bakugo doesn’t touch you but you can still feel his breath puffing on your head, can still feel the heat from his hands on either side of your body.

“You got a smart mouth don’t you? Is that why you embarrassed me earlier in front of everyone?”

“Embarrassed you-?” You squeak but immediately cut off when he thrusts his face right in front of yours, a manic look on his face as all his facial features stretch into a irate leer.

“I guess we’ll have to fix that tongue of yours. Put it to better use than to talk shit about me, right?”

Vermilion irises move from your face down your body, lingering on your chest and at the apex in between your legs.

Bile rises to your throat as he licks his lips and lets his lips ghost over yours, oh so close yet not touching.

And in the second before he descends, you shove him off with nothing but pure adrenaline feeling your fear and race past him, blindly running down the halls as fast as you can.

Surprisingly, you don’t hear anyone behind you. That doesn’t mean you don’t stop running though.

The real reason you don’t hear anyone behind you is because Katsuki Bakugo has an eerie smile on his face at your bolt. He languidly stretches his arms above his head and relishes in the popping of his joints, and in succession the popping of sparks in his hand. He kicks one leg out, then the other just to ensure you get a fair head start.

You’ve just made this so much more interesting.

He sets off at a light jog, and even in his carefree pace his strides are enough to eventually catch up with you, instinct like an animal’s guiding him through the winding halls and ending up catching a glimpse of your feet as you turn into another lane.

You’re panting, sweat pouring down your eyes as panic makes it hard to breathe or think rationally. The adrenaline that was pushing you is now dying down but at the worst time.

You take a quick glance back and your rapidly beating heart falters as you see him with a grin on his face as he practically jogs leisurely behind you. You’ve seen this same face on him when he’s in the battlefield, blasting through enemy hearts and blowing up heads as if they were fireworks.

He’s bloodthirsty. He wants you.

“Running away again? That’s not very heroic of you babe,” he calls out, and it’s terrifyingly infuriating how he’s not out of breath.

“Leave me the fuck alone,” you half scream and sob, trying to run faster but failing miserably.

You see a bathroom sign out of the corner of your eye and frantically stumble towards it.

Katsuki knows you know he’s even you take a turn and he laughs to himself at how boringly easy this is.

Maybe he was scary.

He shakes it off and continues his hunt after you, coming forth until he faces the bathroom door in which you were cowering behind.

There’s a small window, and no other door. Just a couple of stalls, a terrified girl, and a psycho with the taste of revenge practically palpable on his lustful tongue.

He knock with faux politeness. “You wanna come out and do this the easy way or you want me to barge in and take you myself?”

You sob and wheeze in response, desperately pushing against the flimsy door in a pathetic attempt to keep him out. Bakugo merely crosses his arms and leans against the door, staring intently at it with a smile still on his face.

Judging by the weight pushing more at the bottom of the door, he can tell you’re probably sitting down in an effort to catch your breath.

You both know he can come in at any time he so well pleases, but he decides he’ll play by your rules for a bit longer, indulge you a little before your inevitable downfall.

He hums loudly and slides down to join your parallel position on the floor.

“I’m tryina be nice here, y’know. You acted so scared of me when I never even bothered you before. Aren’t I being nice right now by letting you choose for yourself?”

He sounds so conversational, as if he were talking to one of his buddies. You stay silent but your silence speaks volumes.

It serves as nothing but a means to piss him off further.

The two of you sit in silence for seemingly hours, even though it’s only around 20 minutes. Every second you feel like he’s going to break down the door any second and blast your face off, but miraculously he doesn’t.

You don’t know what you’d rather prefer: for him to prolong your strained agony by letting you be so close yet so far from him, or to end your suffering and get it done with.

But you needn’t sit in silence stewing in your own fear any further, for at the exact moment you begin to doze off with the dying of the light the weight on the other side of the door lifts and you startle awake at the scuffling on the other side.

You blink a couple of times and blanch when you see through the window the purple light indicating that you really have been here longer than you thought.

Bakugo cracks his knuckles and rolls his head, popping a few more kinks in his neck before breathing out and bracing for impact.

“Ready or not little bitch, here I come.”

“Bakugo, wait-!”

But your plea doesn’t last for more than two words. The door bangs open with such a sound that you actually think he’s blasted it straight off his hinges. You gasp and shield yourself, jumping backwards and covering your face.

“‘Thought I made it clear by now that you can’t run. So why’d you try to leave? Huh? Think you’re smarter than me? You think you’re stronger than me?”

He’s stalking forward again, and you’re left tripping back over your feet and whimpering at his salacious intent as he backs you up and corners you into a stall.

He already knows the answers to his rhetorical questions but he wants to hear you say it. He wants to hear that scornful conviction in your voice about how big and bad he was that you used earlier.

With you tripping backwards into the cramped stall, his approach quickens in hunger at feeling you, feeling the fear radiating off your body.

Bakugo presses up against you against the wall and takes up the space around you, invading your personal bubble. He’s everywhere, growling in your ear, hands gripping your waist so tight you’re sure bruises sprout from his touch, his erect penis grinding on the inside of your thigh.

Your trepidation and terror rises to an insurmountable height as he smothers you.

When he suddenly grips your chin and forces your head to face him you gasp. His touch is even more callous than you thought.

“You lookin’ here bitch? Good.”

His palm is raised towards you and before you can even widen your eyes in realization his appendage starts sparking madly. You shriek and try to throw him loose as little bits of embers fly out and made your face, his voice rough as always yet dangerously low and soft.

“S’not so scary after all is it? You’re reacting better to it than I thought.” Bakugo Blanca you mocks your writhing figure as you desperately try to evade the mini explosions.

“Okay, I get it, please stop I don’t like it!” You shrilly cry out but his hand moves from your jaw down to your neck, and squeezes the last remnants of opposition out of you.

“Yeah? Good, I’m glad you get it. But honestly, I don’t care if you don’t like it.

Because I like it. I fucking love this quirk, ‘specially when you cower so prettily under it like you did earlier.”

You choke and try to scrabble at his hands but it’s like a butterfly’s touch to him, barely producing any fruition.

“I kept wondering to myself: why do I care if she’s scared of it? And then I realized,” he leans in and lets his lips brush over your ear, lets his hand lessen ever so slightly so that your main focus is his words.

“You just looked good enough to eat when you know you’re beneath me. When you know how dangerous I am.”

He pulls back and assesses the look on your face. “Makes you look good enough to eat.”

And without further ado he lowers his hand and starts rubbing his alit palm on your clothed pussy, his erection getting harder as your screams wilt into whines.

Your legs flail uselessly as he burns a hole through your pants and his fingers hook aside the band of your panties.

Bakugo thrusts his hips forwards and grinds his straining cock on your moist lips, taking in your blubbers and teary eyes.

You can’t even speak, you can only cry out like a child as he thrusts harder and harder, so hard that your back hits the wall painful and the stall walls rattle behind you.

“You-pant-fucking scared-pant-now slut?” He rasps, his head bobbing on rhythm with yours as he practically lifts you off your toes to match his pace.

Your clit is caught between the fabric and rolled cruelly pleasurable as his tip leaks precum, staining your own panties in the process.

With your attention rapt on his now-uncovered dick sliding in and out of your folds, he takes this opportunity to take his other hand off your neck and blast the wall next to your face.

The second you open your mouth in shock as bits of tile rain down on your face he slams his steaming palm over your lips, burning the soft flesh as you weep openly.

He sets off two more near your sides and another above your head, his own face aligned right in front of yours so you can see the mean smile on his face all the while he sets your heart racing at an alarming speed.

When the smoke clears and you can start feeling glass and tile imprint on your once-smooth face, he positions his dick up so that it prods at your hole and yanks your hair back.

His eyes practically glow with the mini fires preserved in the walls with his blasts, the impact of the air rushing around him makes his hair even spikier, his body is taunt and even more imposing than before.

His teeth gleam with the orange and red light next to you. His chest doesn’t heave, because he’s at ease with your terror.

“You think you know fear?”

With one swift movement he shoves up into you, but this time he doesn’t cover your mouth.

“You haven’t met me truly yet.”