#and there are 5 BLs I'm not even watching right now

[absolutebl]

Frigay is INSANE this month.

There is so much BL this one day and then so little the rest of the week.

[nozunhinged]

My Top 5 BL Kisses of Jan (& Feb) 24 + why

Okay, okayyyyy I'm doing this, no backing out. I offically accept that analyzing kisses takes up so much of my brainspace that I can write about it — so here it goes. I'M NOT HIDING ANYMORE BUT OWNING UP TO IT! (lol, chill)

Last year I complained that I didn't get a single perfect kiss since I started watching BL TV shows (until PhayaTharn turned up) and now we're not even a quarter into the new year and I already got FIVE I'm absolutely in AWE about!! FIVE!!

I don't know if it's the actors, directors or coaches who upped their game (probably all of them) but hot damn, all of these are beautiful.

And don't ask me why I'm into kiss-acting so much I have no fucking clue, my first guess is that it's an artform in itself to make this amazing, wonderful, intimate form of touching look as beautiful as it feels — bc let's be honest here, irl kissing rarely looks pretty no matter how great it is! So I think it's just dope when you can see this beauty translated on screen.

So I guess this is peak romance genre for me and with that being said, enough talking, lets get to the kissykissies!

5. TenPrem - Cooking Crush EP. 11

I have to be honest with you, I was a bit confused by the kissing in this show. The tippytoe kiss was cute as heck but we all saw how Off AND Gun awkwardly blinked because they probably had to stay like that for a looooong time. It took the whole magic out of the whole first-kiss-moment. Same with the forced in, reshot makeout-scenes. But the kiss in the kitchen? Looks like they FINALLY got to show what they got.

Ten gently pulling Prem closer, them smoothly moving against each other, Ten closing in even more, the slightly open-mouthed kiss with their lips perfectly caressing each other, Ten with a bit more force, Prem with a bit more heat resulting in the perfect mix...Loved it, mwah.

4. PromNont - Playboyy EP. 12

They are my one Playboyy-couple where I'm like "if they don't end up married and running Playboyy together, starting the revolution of well-payed, insured and safe sex workers I'm gonna riot" even though I know this show will not end nicely for ANYONE.

Anyways, this kiss. Holy smokes they had so many good scenes but this one took the cake. Not just the sheer length of it (but still with perfect timing and breaks).

The slightest suck on Nonts upper lip, Prem literally making Nont sway, Nonts hidden desperation for Prom surfacing from his lips, them slowly but surely turning up the heat and last but not least, Prom grabbing Nonts face just to lean against him...UGH THEM!

(I made those)

3. Myungha & Yeowoon - Love for Love's Sake EP 8

I know I'm not alone in how this show swept me off my feet and hit me right in the feels. But I've gotta say, this kiss hit completely different. Again they kissed for so long but not a single moment felt wasted. It felt like their whole story put in a single kiss. And — I mean that in the most loving and positive way possible — they kissed so amazingly gay. Do you know what I mean?!

There's just this level of love, care and happiness that only queer couples can convey. Sprinkled with a hint of tongue (I saw that Yeowoon 👀) — they absolutely nailed it.

2. AlanJeff - Pit Babe EP. 11

The kiss that made me consider doing this post in the first place. I saw them and shouted THIS IS PERFECT just to realize that I did this a few weeks ago already and it made me spiral a little. In the best way possible because I felt truly blessed once again to have discovered the genre of BL in their golden era!

Because this right here is how you nail an open mouthed kiss my friends. Take notes BL producers. Put this in your textbooks! They both go at the same rythm (slow, careful but so, so loving JUST LIKE THEIR RELATIONSHIP UGH) and same level of touch so their lips caress each other perfectly. Furthermore, Alan knows exactly how to meet Jeff which is also a PERFECT EXTENSION OF HIS CHARACTER! Alan leads, Jeff follows but they meet perfectly and equally. TEN OUT OF TEN NO NOTES!

1. PhayaTharn - The Sign EP. 9

I don't understand the meaning of the "Roman Empire"-thing but I think if I say they are mine, I am correct because they will be the end of me and that's what that means right? I may be biased AF but objectively speaking, this is just an insanely well acted-out scene, PERIOD! And we all know it's thanks to Billybabes out-of-this-world-chemistry!

Phayas desperation translated into this gorgeous lip-clash, so much yearning but softness at the same time but what really got to me was how Tharn immediately melted after their lips touched, how he immediately opened up to him and got completely overwhelmed by Phayas feelings. Chapeau to Babe for showing so much range in a single second. My favorite kiss of the whole series ❤️

I also just realized all these kisses have one thing in common....hands on faces lol.

Well that was fun peeps, thanks if you made it until the end!

[watchingblsnowandforever]

We Are Ep.11

Part 1

*sits with half a tub of ice cream with both AC and fan on because my AC is old and needs a little help and puts my cat on Do Not Disturb mode (aka scratching his belly)*

Hello!!!!

Welcome back to my crack posting! =D

Warning: long post, and since I have like 60 screenshots, there will be a part two 😊😅

I wrote that intro before I'd watched the ep. Me as I was watching the ep was mostly incoherent screaming (so much so that my cat woke up from his nap to give me "what the hell, hooman" look).

This episode was amazing, and I loved it, and I'll probably die of too much fluff, but that won't happen before I finish watching We Are (which- WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE ARE JUST 5 EPS LEFT?!!).

I was giggling and kicking my feet (just like Peem the morning after that Prince Charming kiss) from the very first scene.

Oh, they are so gone for each other (and I am gone for them 😭). The smiles, the trying to hear what the other is doing just across the door ah

So, so true. As a writer that hits.

Also, I'm very glad they decided to showcase creative blocks, even if it was for a few minutes.

Me to PhumPeem: yes, Peem, I would love to know too.

Also- I really wanna know what Ciize was doing back there 😭

Too cute to handle 😭

Jokes (and puns) aside, this scene is quite significant. Previously, whenever Phum was seen in the vicinity of the Fine Arts building, it was only because he wanted something from Peem (yes even that scene in ep. 8, he wanted company from Peem), but now, he's just sitting there waiting for Peem. And when Peem comes down, he's pinching his cheeks right there and acting cute with him and asking what's wrong.

And he keeps on asking, because he can see that Peem is a little moody, and not his usual self. "You're usually livelier than this."

Phum: "Actually, I want to be water too..."

Me: No way, is this what I think it is?

Phum: "I want to be the reason you feel good."

Me: yeah, yep, that's what I thought

No but, you can't tell me Phum doesn't binge watch BLs with his beloved teddy bear. Of course he has a whole arsenal of cheesy flirting lines.

All this time, it was always Phum telling Peem how comfortable he is around him and his friends, how fun it is.

Welp, it's Peem's turn.

I love Phum.

This is both him asking for consent as well as making sure they're on the same page and going at the same pace (which he always does, as I'd said before).

Also, no, he wants you to get closer.

HANDS.

Hear how polite and soft Q is with Toey now? Once Q knew for sure that he's allowed to show affection towards Toey as more than just a mentor/mentee, he decided to be fluffy as heck and never went back (because his love language is giving and showing through actions).

Love that for them both <3

This is such a valid fear.

He was afraid that his love would be too much, and in the process he'd lose the person he loves again, so he thought it better to just suffer alone than confess. Not gonna lie, my heart broke just a little here. (Also, because I'm currently rewatching MSP, I'll be pulling a lot of parallels, and this reminds me of that scene where Sound tells Gun that he's afraid to confess to Win because he's pretty sure he'll get rejected).

Oh, and I keep forgetting to say this, but Satang is such an amazing actor. Watching Sound and Toey, I almost can't believe they're played by the same person.

Phum's lethal weapon and Peem's fatal weakness 😭

Let's be honest though, no one would be able to resist that smile, those eyes and that soft, "Na, krab". Oh yeah, he used polite pronouns here by the way.

I can't always notice the shift from formal to informal or vice versa because I'm not that well-versed in the language (yet) but this was pretty obvious.

Bonus (Peem's reaction):

Tan: flirts with his theerak non-stop 24/7 Fang: *brushes his hair a little and apologizes for making him wait* Tan: *melts into a blushing mess*

That man is so whipped.

And in this house, we stan all whipped men.

This actually reminds me of when I was a wee baby (around 3 or 4 years old, I think) when I rescued a baby sparrow and took it to my dad and told my neigbours my dad would be able to heal it because he's a dcotor (he isn't a vet either) 😭

Also- naming a bird by another bird is so true to Pun's character.

This so relatable oh gods 😭

Also, we got the princess carry for Pride month! Twice if we count Chain lifting Pun in the waterfall, which I totally do.

We finally get being carried to bed but realizing they're laying on top of the blankets instead of just being magically wrapped in them by morning!

*sighs fondly* such a simp. <3

Uh huh, you said that last time too.

Don't lie, Peem, you'd let him hug you every night.

👀

Is this the reason behind the NC rating?

Also, this singular line just gave me a brain worm that is making me write my first smut fic. I blame y'all for getting me into this series.

Yes, of course, Phum, everyone believed your "snort mi mi mi".

Don't think I didn't see your little secret smile, Peem.

(Also, I have a headcanon that Phum just loves to be the little spoon)

Now who's hugging who, huh?

"Go away", he says, while putting his arm around his (not) boyfriend.

See, it was all fun till this point, but you can't be giving me this level of domestic fluff while at the same time telling me they're not even dating yet. That just doesn't work.

So, for me, from this point on, they're an old married couple <3

Frankly though, all the four couples in this series are old married couples that just don't know they're married yet.

Toey: HELP ME!!!

Q: WHAT HAPPENED WHO NEEDS BEATING UP-

Toey: I forgot to do my assignment and today's the deadline 🥺

Q: ... 😑

You don't...?

I thought that was the perfect time to start working on it?

jk jk, kids, I'm a chronic procrastinator, please don't learn from me, learn from your P'Q

(Q reminds me so much of @desi-yearning when she scolds me after I pull an all-nighter to submit an assignment or study for an exam 😭)

Oh. Oh.

Oh my.

I love this scene so much.

This pencil box is very very special to Q, and he's asking Toey to draw on it - something that is irriversible, as Toey himself says.

But this is Q's way of putting together both his loves. This pencil box was picked up by Toey the first time, but back then, Q only knew him as Milk Frappe Boy.

Now, he's asking Toey to do something Milk Frappe Boy would never have been able to (remember, Toey started taking an interest in art only after meeting Pencil Senior), because Pencil Senior disappeared on Milk Frappe Boy, but Q would never disappear on Toey.

On this note, I end Part 1.

Part 2 will be out tomorrow, because as much as I try to deny it, I have these pesky things called responsibilities to attend to, and it's very late here now (not past my regular bed time, but way past my ideal bed time 😭)

Thank you for reading! 😊

Here, have some pizza and a cookie🍕🍕🍪

[If you want, my previous posts: Ep. 8 Ep.9 Ep.10]

And here's Part 2

[bengiyo]

Only Friends Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

We've been waiting for Jojo to be unleashed for a long time. Let's do this.

Wouldn't be a Jojo show without a Jennie cameo.

Oh, they're letting First sing again.

Real shit, I kinda like the wristbands to signal what people might be into at this bar. Hearkens back to older handkerchief traditions.

Ray is kinda feisty. He's so ready to beef with someone.

Oh my god I have been part of this friend group as the table keeper.

Neo looks so good.

Ew, vomit.

They are about to fuck up Mew's academic career.

Of course Khaotung is playing the rich brat.

Boston messed them up first by combining work and sex. He's definitely going to bring Top on as the designer.

Hello, again, Mark. Always glad to see you.

Okay, love seeing Nick and Boston vibe.

Very refreshinging to just see guys flirting with each other without the BL pretense. Even gives us Ray being shitty because he feels possessive of Mew.

Top said he's had enough of the sex tryhards.

Oh, Boston, what was that? You brought Top around your friends and now you're jealous of Mew?

DRAKE?!!!

Ray is that friend who always requires so much when we go out.

"I'm gonna charge you more than an airport taxi." 😂

First and Khaotung really are just so powerful. I'm glad this is a strong cast, because their teamwork when it's just them is still so enjoyable to watch.

Congratulations to ForceBook for being the first to have a scene on this show, and on the counter no less.

Not these two having ice cream since Mew isn't ready. Top is going to be a problem, but at least he understands what No means.

Should I keep a counter for how many times Ray throws up in this show?

First still has it. One fond look and it's over.

No one had Neo and Drske as the first to fuck on their bingo board. Cutting this with Nick jacking off to unethically acquired thirst traps? My goodness.

Oh interesting. Top didn't put his pants back on.

I know we all came here for the hot stuff, but I really like seeing Mew and Top negotiate intimacy during this first night together.

Sand put Ray in a POOR BOY shirt. Those used to cost $5 in the city now I can't get a good sandwich for less than $12.

Ray you could just say thanks. No need to be a dick constantly.

This book store date is cute.

Okay, Nick! I like this thirst trap play!

Everyone is just going for it! Good job, Neo and Mark.

I really liked this one week montage.

Ray is channeling Bruce Wayne. "Harvey Dent. Can we trust him?"

Boston called Ray right out on his crush on Mew.

Only Cheum is invested in helping Mew out here.

"You're concerned about your friend, or you're just jealous?" Top clocked him.

Oh no is Force going to sing?

Oh, whew, it's just a grand gesture.

This was so much fun! I love that Boston and Ray are going to be the source of everyone's problems! Jealous Thot and Rich Boy With Anger Issues are some of my favorites. Why does First always have the most soulful eyes? Mew is another really good role for Book, and Force is clearly having the time of his life. Is there nothing Mark Pakin can't do? Lookjun is warming up, but I'm looking forward to more.

Also, Drake cameo! Who's going to show up next??

[basu-shokikita]

Dethentines 2024 Day 5

In the style of a romance novel

So, uh, because I'm not a reader of romantic novels @mirrorshards suggested I use a manga for today which I thought was better for me because I'm infinitely more knowledgeable in that field. That said, she still ended up helping me choose a title...

And like that, have a Skwistok version of the BL Therapy Game. This entry is a little more suggestive than the others, so take that as a warning. It was definitely challenging to adapt this story to these two for a handful of reasons but I think I managed! So, here we go~

Skwisgaar was used to messing around. 

With women, with men, it was all the same to him. None of them really meant anything to him besides temporary fun and a good distraction.

And so, he didn’t think of anything different when this guy Toki walked around, weeping about his girlfriend who dumped him for somebody else. He was drinking his heart away for different reasons, anyway. His best friend and companion, the guitar, didn’t want to hang out with him these days. 

Not that this guy would understand. 

“Ahhh!!” Toki cried into his hands. “Linda, whys…you ams- hic- you ams the love of my lives…”

“T’ere, t’ere…” Pickles patted his back sympathetically while giving his friends a look.

Toki tried to reach for a half-empty bottle of Red Label, but Nathan grabbed it before he did. “I think you’ve drunk enough, buddy.” 

“No ways!” Toki exclaimed, barely able to keep his body straight. “I wants to…I wants to drinks untils I die!”

“He’sch way over the line.” Murderface said with crossed arms and disdain on his face. 

“Ja…” Skwisgaar agreed. “He shouldks probables gets goings.”

His three friends stared at him while Toki kept rambling like a drunkard.

“Whats?” Skwisgaar was confused.

“Well…” Pickles glanced to the side.

“You brought him over to us.” Nathan said, eyelids heavy but still stoic.

“Whats?!”

“Yeah!” Murderface pointed accusingly. “Thisch isch your fault!”

“Are you fuckings-”

“Whats ams you alls talkings abouts?!” Toki cried. “Nothings- hic- matters! Nothings matters but Lindas!” He threw his hands into the air. “Oh, Lindas, why!”

“God damns it…” Skwisgaar pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Lindaaaaaa…”

“‘S okey, Toki.” Pickles rubbed his back. “Skwisgaar will teik you home, right, Skwisgaar?”

“Fucks you.” Skwisgaar whispered to his friend. “Fines!” He slung Toki’s arm around his shoulder and picked him up. “Let’s goes home, cries babies.”

“Have fahn! But not too much fahn!” 

“Yeah, definitely not too much fun.”

“Eschpeschially not too much fun.”

Skwisgaar rolled his eyes as he carried the babbling Toki away. Why did he have to take care of the idiot?!

–

At the end, Toki was so incoherent that Skwisgaar had to drop him at a hotel, because he didn’t remember his address. He was feeling a little sorry for him, though, so he watched over him until he stopped weeping against the pillow. This wasn’t the first time he had looked after a drunk person, anyway. 

“Dids you calms down alreadies?” He asked, when Toki was staring at the ceiling silently. “I wants to goes home, you knows?”

Toki glanced at him, blinking. “Ams you?”

“Heugh?”

“You saids you was sads about de guitars…”

Skwisgaar was surprised Toki had remembered it in his state, but he shrugged it off. “Pfft, dat ams a differents kinds of lonelies nest.”

A grin spread across Toki’s face as he dragged Skwisgaar closer with his legs.

“W-Whats?” Skwisgaar asked in confusion, only now realizing how strong Toki was.

“Lonelies nest ams still lonelies.” He said before wrapping his arms around Skwisgaar. “Soes you gets a hugs.” His hand patted the back of Skwisgaar’s head.

“Eugh, lets goes…” Skwisgaar grumbled though he didn’t actually move away. “We amsn’t even friends…”

“We ams friends nows…” Toki squeezed him by the waist, his lips brushing with Skwisgaar’s ear dangerously. “Rights?” He whispered.

Surprised, Skwisgaar pulled away. Toki’s expression had abruptly changed, from friendly and innocent to dark and suggestive.

“Heys…” He cupped Skwisgaar’s face sweetly. “It ams fines to wants to be spoileds, you knows?”

What…?

In slow motion, Toki’s eyelids fell shut and his face began to grow closer. It’s not like Skwisgaar wasn’t used to being hit on by strangers constantly…

Wasn’t he straight though?

“You ams too drunks…” He tried to resist but Toki’s grip on him didn’t relent. Reluctantly, Skwisgaar let their lips meet and it was like a surgeon of electricity spread inside his entire body, shocking him.

Bewitched, Skwisgaar wrapped his arms around Toki’s neck, giving into it. He had never experienced such enticing tenderness before and he was swiftly growing addicted to it. Toki’s hands, lips, eyes on him…

Even if he had wanted to pull away, he wouldn’t have been able to. 

He never wanted Toki to let him go now.

–

“Sorries…” Toki apologized the morning after. “I acts stupids sometimes when Is drunks…I don’ts remembers anythings…”

Skwisgaar was baffled. Seriously? The one time sex felt meaningful for him, the other party didn’t even remember it? 

What kind of sick joke was that?

He cleared his throat. “I sees…” He said, unclasping his black leather choker from his neck. “You was pretties wasteds last nights soes…”

“Ja…” Toki seemed genuinely apologetic. “I never learns…”

“It amsnt your faults.” Skwisgaar gently grabbed him by the wrists and Toki looked up. “You gots brokeneds hearts.”

Toki’s eyes had a glimmer of hope. “Soes your forgives-”

“Hows ever.” Skwisgaar interrupted him, blue eyes piercing into blue. “Ams not letting last nights turns into nothingks.” With one smooth movement, he straddled Toki’s naked torso. 

“W-Whats?” Toki’s eyes widened.

“You don’ts remembers?” Skwisgaar leaned towards him. “Dat ams fine. Alls makes you remembers…” He began undoing the button of Toki’s pants. 

“Waits a minutes-”

“Nice and slows…” Skwisgaar continued, his fingers trailing along the zipper.

“I-I don’t wants to!” The panic was beginning to show in Toki’s face.

Skwisgaar smirked. “So you gets to takes advantages of someones and then refuse to acks knowledge? Dat amsn’t nice.”

“Dat’s not-” When Skwisgaar was about to shove a hand inside, he yelled. “Stops!”

It took a few seconds for Skwisgaar to figure he had fallen out of the bed and that the flashing pain on his stomach was from being kicked by Toki’s feet. 

“Eugh…what ams you a monsters…” He groaned, doubling over.

Toki rolled to his side and stood up, a look of disappointment in his face. “Ams you always likes dis?” His breathing was visibly hitched. “Always being doings whats you wants? Beings spoileds?”

Skwisgaar squinted. “Whats?”

With barely any effort, Toki untied the choker from his wrists and threw it on the bed. “I thoughts we coulds be pals, but you ams a jerks.” He grabbed his clothes and walked towards the door before turning back. “And you ams gonna be all alones your holes lives!” The door was slammed behind him.

Stunned, Skwisgaar sat up. Did that crybaby runt just walk out on him?

–

“Fuckings dildos! Who ams he? What ams he- What de fucks!” Skwisgaar slammed his glass against the counter. “I hates him!”

“Dood, Skwisgaar, he was a guy mournin’ his girlfriend. Why did you even lay your hands on him?” Pickles took a sip of his bottle. “We told ya naht to have too much fahn with him.”

“I didn’ts-”

“Yeah, Skwisgaar, he was obviously straight.” Nathan added. “You gotta raise your standards, dude.”

“I wasn’ts-”

“Not everyone isch gay, Schkwisgaar.” Murderface said. “You schould remember that, I mean, you’re friensch with me and I’m not gay. I love ladiesch and titsch.” 

They all went silent.

“Anyways, I didn’t starts anythingks, okeis?” Skwisgaar said. “He ams de ones whats jumps at my arms and has his ways wif mes. Ams innocents dis times.”

“This time…” Pickles rolled his eyes. “How many times have ye been tha one on tha other side of this cahnundrum, huh?”

“Yeah, why are you suddenly mad about this? You’re always breaking people’s hearts.”

“Eugh…”

“You’re a fucking schlut isch what you are!”

Skwisgaar buried his head in his arms. This was the opposite from being encouraging, they were just dogpiling on him. 

“Just forget about tha dood. You’ll find someone new in no tahm. In fact, by tonight, even.” After a moment, Pickles added. “Guess there’s really people even Skwisgaar can’t seduce, huh.”

“He went too far.” Nathan agreed.

“Too smug.” Pickles continued.

“Too arrogant!” Murderface finished.

“Alrights, you know whats?” Skwisgaar sat straight, suddenly determined. “Dats it, alls does it!”

The other three stared at him like he was insane. “Do whet?” Pickles asked.

“Ams gonna makes dat stupid straights guys falls for me.” He raised his glass, smirking. “And dens alls breaks his hearts. Dat will teaches hims, nobody messes with Skwisgaar.”

While Nathan and Murderface shook his head in disapproval, Pickles snuck a hand inside his packet. “Well, I wasn’t gonna tell ye but if ye’re so hellbent on acting stoopid…” When he pulled out his hand, there was some sort of card on it. “He dropped this yesterday, mind givin’ it beck?”

Skwisgaar grabbed the card and inspected it closely, smiling when he recognized the item. It was Toki’s ID. 

Perfect.

[angiehasakitten]

-`♡´- NOT A ROMANTIC PARADISE  

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˚୨୧⋆｡˚ CHAPTER 6   ~   Karma?

{ WHAT TO KNOW }➤  This is HEAVILY inspired by the bl manhwa “No Love Zone” in which the main character ( fem!reader) is a newbie at the company. She has the worst luck in the romance department and always ends up heartbroken. That's when she sees Kamo Choso, who is her total type, but turns out to be her new boss and enemy… 

{ CHAPTER MAY CONTAIN }➤ Language, mention of smoking

{ WORD COUNT }➤ 3.3k

{ OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND }➤ I'll only be writing in 2nd person pov, so there won't be anything like y/n. Also this is based on my personal preferences so i'm sorry if it disappoints. Whenever something like “this is hsown” it indicates the readers toughts. 

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“It’s my turn to talk, isn’t it now?” He says as you glance up at him, seeing that annoyingly cute little grin on his face. “Do you seriously not remember me?” He asks, taking you aback with the sudden question. Was he going on about the time at the station again? Right now?

“We went to the same school.” He finally tells you, making you flinch and turn to him in complete confusion .  

Same school? Tats can’t be? If he really did go to the same school as you, why don’t you recognize him? Plus, why is he bringing this up now? Right after you confessed the fact that you like him…?

.

.

.

.

.

.

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CHOSO’S PAST FLASHBACK…

When Choso was at the age of seventeen, he looked completely unrecognizable.  He was . less than 170 centimeters tall - that’s also known as being under 5 feet and 6 inches- he wore glasses with rims that were far too thick,  and his body was skinnier and smaller than a twig. 

He was quiet in school, and the people who were considered  his friends were fairly similar to him in that way. With no reasons to stay out of school,  there were pretty peaceful school days. That involved him getting into no trouble, no drama, and not needing to worry about silly little things. Even so, there was a lucky someone he had eyes for. 

He would always watch  her from afar, jealousy filling his body as you were playfully sitting on  the tall, white haired, and blue eyed guy, Satoru Gojo’s lap. How could he not be jealous? Satoru was everyone's crush, literally every girl he knew liked that guy, at least at some point they did.  

“You’re heavy!” Satoru tried pushing you off him. “Get off, you little shit!” He would scold you, making you giggle as you clung to him, refusing to leave him alone. “Nuh uh, I don’t wanna!” You would snicker. 

“Ah– Are you monkeys even listening to me?!” Suguru said in annoyance as he groans, rolling his eyes as to how you are being so childish and having him repeat whatever he was saying for the third time. 

You roll your eyes back at him and flip him off. “I give zero fucks about your date, suguru.” You answer him bluntly, seriously not caring about his one of many other women that he met in the past week. 

He gets irritated and gets off his seat which was right behind Satoru’s, walking up to you and pinching your cheek hard. “Ow! Ow!” You whine dramatically  while swatting his hand away. “Are you gonna listen to me now?!” He gives you an alarming look. 

“It really hurts Geto!” You frown at him, even calling him by his last name. He couldn’t care less though, ruffling your styled hair roughly as his last hit, “So were you wrong?” He narrows his eyes at you, attempting to get you to admit to defeat. “I was wrong!” You lift your hand up in surrender. “Please stop now! I’m sorry!” You giggle around as you and Suguru continue to go back and forth with the bickering. 

Choso used to think that just looking at you was enough for hm to be satisfied, but when he came to his senses, it was like trying to pour spilled water back into a cup…

Mini flashback…

Choso stood before you as a stuttering mess, trying to get his words out before finally blurting out, “I- I like you…” He clenched his eyes shut in embarassment.  

“Hey, are you not coming?” Satoru interrupts the moment while impatiently calling for you to follow him as he wanted to go do something he found ‘fun’ again. You snicker at him and shoo him away from a far. “Just wait! I’ll be there in a minute, dumbass.” You yell back to Satoru as you then turn your attention back to the boy before you who had just confessed. 

“Hmm… sorry…” You begin as you slowly examine his appearance. “.. The face is everything to me.” You say so very nonchalantly that it was brutal to Choso. “You're tiny, so i'm not interested in you.” You finish off with a smile, thinking that made any of your hurtful words better to bare for the poor kid. 

Fast forward to Choso that night…

Choso laid flat back on his bed thinking about the previous events in his life. He was expecting to get dumped, it was almost a given to him, but the way you said all that? 

“Tiny…?” He repats that one word in his head while furrowing his brows in confusion.  He hoped it would be something that would’ve been forgoten after he graduated since it was a half-asked confession. With that , his first love ended in failure. 

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After graduation, he stood in line at a coffee shop. Now this isn’t anything out of the ordinary, besides the fact he was hot. Heis now tall, handsome of course, no more glasses seen on his face, and he was very muscular.  

“Your order is ready!” The barista called out to him after he had ordered. “Thanks.” He would simply jst answer politely yet dryly and she was already blushing like an alpha in heat. 

It was troublesome for Choso as his life changed so drastically. It had only been a few months after all, the sudden attention and change in everyone's behavior was something new to adapt to. 

“Wow, it must be nice being so popular wherever you go now.” His friend yuki nudges him playfully. 

“Don’t say unnecessary things.” He side glances at her in humiliation. 

“Are you going to pretend you're not used to this?” Yuki rolls her eyes and looks over at him with a slight tilt in the head. Choso just grunts and pushes her head a little roughly as a small fighting way. “I’m not used to the attention, yuki. I just had a growth spurt over the summer, that’s all.” He clearifies. 

Just then, he catches a glimpse of familiar hair through his peripheral vision, making his gaze turn over to see who it was. He recognized it almost imediately, It had to be you. Choso couldn’t be wrong, it’s your exact haircut and color! 

Choso was slowly brought back to the moment when the girl who he mistook you with turned over to look at her friend who had just walked  in the cafe. Choso felt a hinge of disappointment run over him when he realized it wasn’t you, but what if it was you? What would’ve changed? He wouldn’t walk up to you anyway so why was this feeling clinging to him? 

The truth is, he never ended up letting go of the past. How could he? You were his first love- his first confession, and his first rejection. It seems he is still chasing after the same memory after all this time. It has been months after all, plus, he is extremely attractive now, he can get anyone else he wants. 

Yuki was there to save his situation as she snapped him out of his thoughts. “Did you even hear anything I just said? What are you looking so intensely at? That's creepy you know.” She scolded him, playfully kicking his leg as she called im out as a ‘creep’. Choso shakes his head and grabs his drink before getting up from the table he was sitting at with his friend. “Let’s just go. I don’t wanna be late for our class, I have a career to chase, unlike you.” He rolls his eyes as Yuki starts bickering about how she is also trying to get a career, annoyed by his accusation. 

That’s when Choso made it his goal to become a brand new man. He wanted to forget everything about hi past and focus on the future. Years go by, he worked hard in University and got amazing grades. His hard work definitely paid off, because soon enough he was manager at a pretty big company. He was able to get his own luxurious place, settling in and being excited to start his brand new major job. This is it, his goal is complete- or so he thought. 

Then, on an early morning as he was calmly just strolling around his new neighborhood, he decided to take the subway, and that is when everything came back. You were there, beside him with a fair distance, both waiting for the transport to arrive. The way you both made eye contact, his memories all flung right back. You haven’t changed much from highschool, besides your figure maturing and maybe a change in style of hair and makeup, but other than that your face was the same. He assumed you recognized him, yet you didn’t. Instead you were gawking over him, finding him as eye candy. 

That moment only lasted maybe a minute or two as he soon got on the subway that arrived not too long after the two of you locked gazes. He assumed that was your last encounter with him until his first day at the job. He soon came to find out he was your boss. Quite interesting and endearing it seemed to him. What were the chances of this happening? The best part of it all was him seeing right through you and knowing you liked him. It was obvious with all the signs you were giving him. 

It was funny to him how you tried being sneaky with your glances, thinking you were slick with it. Choso would always just cringe to himself, yet he can’t deny the fact that it did feel good and ego boosting, watching as the tables have turned from him liking you years ago to you doing the same, only years later. 

Choso found your work sloppy, but what can he really do? That's right, he could play around with you for a bit. This is how the  strange actions started happening at work ever since, leading to your delusional thoughts.  

He found it funny when you would be talking to your friends, yapping as usual until Choso would purposlly  bump into you, watching as you apologize normally before you turn to see it was him standing behind you. It was pathetic, yet cute in a way,  to him how you started showing special treatment once you saw him, apologizing even more and getting all red and anxious. 

Well, now this is how you ended up in the position you were in at the moment. Sitting in your manager’s car as he reveals to you that he used to go to the same school as you. Choso wondered how you’d react once you found out who he really was. ..

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𓍢ִ໋🌷֒✧ ༘ ⋆｡♡𓍢ִ໋🌷֒✧ ༘ ⋆｡♡𓍢ִ໋🌷֒✧ ༘ ⋆｡♡

“Hmmm…” You hum in a thinking matter as you look off to the side, trying to remember anyone remotely close to Choso whom you might have met in school, yet nothing comes to mind. You look back at him with a small shrug before smiling. “You went to my high school, huh? That's so interesting!” You began, “I wonder why I can’t remember you, I bet you would’ve been popular back then, I guess my memory is going a little bad” You chuckle awkwardly. 

Choso glances at you before looking over at the road since he was driving you home. “Well, it has been years since we graduated.” He hHe says before speaking a bit more bluntly, “It’s either you don't remember, or it’s that you’re losing memory from old age.” 

You looked at him for any signs of him joking but he stayed so serious and nonchalant it made you stunned for a second. Seriously, how dare he just call you old when you were the same age?! You awkwardly and uncomfortably laugh and scratch your head. “Haha.. I guess that could be it.” You force out before noticing you were on your street already. “You can stop here mr. Kamo.” You tell him as you get your bag ready in your hands. 

Choso does as you say and stops the car, letting you walk out as he watches you. “Thank you for the ride,  because of you I was able to get home safely.” You bow your head slightly in a thankful manner. You stand up straight and fidget a bit with your nails. “About what I told you earlier..” You referred to your confession, “.. please don't worry about it if it’s troublesome-” 

Choso interrupts you as he nods in realization about the fact he didn’t give you an answer. “Oh yeah, I forgot about that.” He says as he thinks for a moment about his next words. “Sorry, the face is everything to me.” He says with the smallest smirk ever, mocking your words from years ago. After that, he drives off and leaves you in your thoughts. 

You stand there for a minute or maybe even three, repeating what he told you in your head. That line… it sounded familiar, as if you heard it somewhere before. Your brain seems to freeze in the moment before it clicks- No. Fucking. Way.

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SLAM!! Satoru yelps as his front door flies open, revealing a panicked figure standing in the door frame. “What the hell? You scared the shit out of me!!” He scolded as he walked over to you, letting you in as you looked at him desprately.

“Do you have it?!” You huff out, breathing heavily since you just ran all the way to his house at this time of night.

Satoru raises a brow at you, “Have what?” 

“Graduation album!!!” You raise your voice urgently.

“Probably in the office- wait- why are you needing it at this time today?!” He questions, but not fast enough as you’re already rushing into the room. He follows behind you and watches as you rummage through his book shelf, finding the album and rapidly opening it and flipping pages. 

You flip and examine each page quickly, searching for the name ‘Kamo Choso’ anywhere at all. Suddenly youspot the name, seeing a nerdy looking boy, the one you rejected to be specific. You scream in doom as you fall to the floor in horror, making Satoru flinch and just watch blankly in confusion. “How is this anywhere close to the same person!!!” You yell to yourself. 

After a good half hour, Satoru was able to drag you over to the couch so you wouldn’t be on the cold floor in such distress. Currently, he was on the phone with who you assumed was Suguru. He was asking him if he knew what the hell you were on to be acting like this, crying on the couch as if someone just died. 

All your memories popped right back in as you felt so embarassed.  How couldn’t you tell all along? Choso was hinting it all along by asking if you remembered him, how badly it hurt you that he knew all along yet you were too blind to realize that he was the kid you rejected. To be fair, he looks nothing like he used to look like in school. That didn’t help you from balling your eyes out at the pure humiliation as he even used the same words you used to reject him.

“Satoru…” You sob to him. “I won’t go to work tomorrow.. Call me in sick, please!!” You cry harder. He just rolls his eyes and smacks you with a pillow. 

“You’re saying bullshit again. I’m tired, so get your ass home or go shower and settle in the guest room.” He says before getting off the couch, disappearing into his room. You didn’t have a choice but to shower and attempt to sleep, yet you failed as you weren't able to fall asleep at all. 

You sat on Satou’s balcony as you sat there ghostly looking , smoking a cigarette after doing so good at quitting for your siblings. You sigh as you rest your head on your knees,  getting into your depression mode. 

You then prop your head up a bit as you think about everything. This stuff happens in life all the time. After all, who would’ve recognised him? So you should be okay right?  Wrong. Your mind drifts off making you guilty again. You were the one who rejected him for his appearance, now this was your karma. That’s right, all because you went for a face. 

You scream into your hand as you try to get all these thoughts away. Why did your life have to always be like this? You just want love yet you can’t get what you want even if your life depended on it. 

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You stare at your desk as you get to the office. Didn’t you say you weren’t gonna go? Then again, who is gonna make the money? You sigh as you slide into your seat, grumbling in frustration. What was the point of all this, just kill yourself at this point. 

To make things ten times ‘better’ you hear your name being called out, as well as a big hand was placed on your shoulder. Of course it had to be Choso. He was probably doing this shit on purpose. 

“Let's go to the meeting room, it’s time.” He says before walking away, making you remember about the company meeting you had to go to. 

“Ah, yes..” You say before quickly getting your notes that you were required to have for the meeting,making your way there shortly after. 

You sit in the meeting room, distracted with your thoughts. While you remain  zoned out, Choso explains how sales in the company were decreasing per contract, which led to the solution of having them remake a new contract that would guarantee higher sales. Not to mention, he wanted this all to be brought to him by the next morning. 

As Choso held the meeting, you can’t help but feel aggravated with the thought of the night prior. Face is everything, huh? You said that because you were a childish kid in school,it has been a whole decade and he can’t let that go? Plus, if face is everything, was he saying something was wrong with yours?! That made your blood boil-

“We’ll leave all this to you. Remember, I expect to receive everything by tomorrow morning.” You hear Choso say to you directly. The room fell silent. Out of everyone he makes you do all the work.

What. The. Fuck.

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˚୨୧⋆｡˚ CHAPTER 6 COMPLETE     

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{ A/N }➤ OKAY OKAY OKAY.. I APOLOGIZE FOR THE LACK OF POSTING.. 

I was so very caught up with finals and exams that I just had NO TIME TO WRITE. 

PLEASE UNDERSTAND AND I PROMISE I'LL TRY TO POST MUCH MUCH MORE. 

ANYWAYS…

I hope everyone is doing well!! I hate how you guys knew Choso would be that kid but OH WELL!!! 

ALRIGHT WELL GOOD NIGHT GUYS IMA GO TRY TO CHECK MY SPELLING AND UPLOAD FOR YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also thoughts so far? =.=

LOVE YOU MY LITTLE KITTENS !!!! (∗˃̶ ᵕ ˂̶∗)

──────────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆────────

last chap ~ next chap

[respectthepetty]

Hi RTP! What are the BLs you would recommend solely for the colors? 🌈

Anon, before I answer this great ask, I want to highlight other posts I've written that are slightly similar:

Reading the (Visual) Rainbow Awards 2023

Overall Winner - Kiseki: Dear to Me

Top Five - Color-Coded Storytelling in BLs

Honorable Mention: Oh No! Here Comes Trouble

5) Moonlight Chicken

4) My Beautiful Man

3) My Love Mix Up

2) Semantic Error

1) Big Dragon

Top Five Color Moments of 2023

Honorable Mention: 7 Days Before Valentine

5) GAP

4) Bed Friend

3) Last Twilight

2) Moonlight Chicken

1) The Eighth Sense

Bonus: Jeff Satur x SHAUN's "Steal the Show"

I don't want to repeat any of the shows I picked, and I'm trying to pick more recent ones so people can find them if they want to watch them, but per your ask, I'm recommending them based solely on colors regardless of how much I liked them.

Recommended Colorful BLs

Honorable Mention: Intern in My Heart

The show is not finished, and it's not a BL, yet it is doing everything right, which is why it gets the honorable mention. Great (Grey) is coded black/dark in the show, and Top is coded pink/light. They are supporting characters who are best friends, and they have stuck to their colors throughout, but in the last episode, they *almost* exchanged colors after Top revealed that he liked Great. Now I'm praying to all the saints for a full color exchange in the finale like I have a personal stake in this because I do! I'm invested, and it better not disappoint me.

#5 - One Room Angel

When I write "Heavenly Human" for a character who wears white, and "Black Brooder" for a character who wears black, THIS is what I mean. A story about an actual angel and a guy who wanted to die was the perfect place to use the light x dark dynamic. However, calling this show a BL is troublesome, which is why it's number five. It still is a great example of what the light x dark color scheme should be used for, and in the end, the guy who wanted to die is much lighter in mood and color, which is what the colors are all about.

#4 - Why R U? (Korea)

First and foremost, that kiss was LIT! The Thai version had Tutor and Fighter's high heat, which could never be matched, but Korea had that kiss, and it ate! But on top of that, it had colors! Ji Oh was a Black Brooder while Lee Won was a Multicolored Menace, and right after this kiss, they flipped colors. That's right! After five episodes of being enemies, they made out for acting "reasons," and then exchanged colors. Normally, Korea is all about the feelings, so the color exchanges in Korean BLs align with a character's feelings changing, but this one directly correlated with a kiss. And for emphasis - That kiss was fire!

#3 - Secret Crush on You

Destiny Seeker might have won the 2023 award for best group effort in color coding, but Secret Crush on You set the bar for that award the year before. This show is Color-Coding 101. Each character has a color, and by each, I mean each and every single damn character in a cast of eleven (plus three fairy godmothers) has their own color. That is a ridiculous feat! Wardrobe, props, and lighting deserved a raise for this show. Some shows can't even get consistent color coding when it only has two characters, but this show understood the color-coding group assignment for the entire series! I'm still applauding two years later.

#2 - Stay by My Side

Taiwanese BLs are my vice. Even the worst Taiwanese BL will still be better than the rest of these BLs. I WROTE WHAT I WROTE. So, of course, I liked this show beyond color reasons, but the colors greatly helped me enjoy the show even more. We had a guy who was haunted by ghosts. He was colorful and light coded. Then we had his roommate who could magically keep the ghosts away. He was dark coded. Read it again. The guy being haunted was bright, light, and colorful, while the guy with the power to help was dark. GENIUS! It was Mr. Unlucky Has No Choice but to Kiss with a supernatural twist. The dark coded guy is sad and isolated but the one who is being HAUNTED BY GHOSTS brings life to his world! Give me a minute. I'm still not over it.

#1 - Pit Babe

I watched this show muted and without subtitles, yet the colors guided me through all thirteen episodes. I understood the plot perfectly because of the colors, and only became confused when people tried to tell me about the actual plot. Alpha? Omega? Santa Maria? Wasn't important. Didn't matter. I don't know them. Red and Blue were the main characters here, and they did their damn job. Babe, in his black, was his own man. He wasn't trying to fit in, but every time the red light focused on Charlie and Way, I was screaming for Babe to run because the colors told me they were still tied to Tony BECAUSE THEY WERE! That's elite color coding, and it ushered in a whole new way for me to watch a show. I loved it.

Bonus: Old Fashion Cupcake

I love this show which is why it is a bonus. Unlike the other shows where I had issues with some part of the plot, Old Fashion Cupcake is as close to perfect as any show has ever come in my personal rating system. It is an Advanced Color Coding course only offered for graduate students, which, honestly, is very Japanese of it because it was in the ties. The color coding showed up in other ways, but the ties were where the story lived since in the past, Nozue was a bright red, but we saw his red damper in the present, which made his loyal assistant bluer. It was only five episodes, yet it used every second of those five episodes in every single way to propel the story forward, colors included. Actually, let me go rewatch this for the hundredth time instead of just writing about it!

[puffmais]

I Feel You Linger In The Air (Rant)

I really needed to make this because I've finally discovered why so many bls fans (not everyone) keep ignoring this story in particular, which, in my opinion, holds the place for #1 bl of the year.

People are really not ready to watch great acting, great plot, great cinematography, great ost, great everything. You really have a period bl drama right in front of your eyes, but apparently one of the main excuses is that the relationship "goes really slow", and some people on Twitter and Reddit even said that Jom never shows his feelings just like in the novel, and that is always Khun Yai the one who gives affection. Let's go for the first one: first of all, are we watching the same show? Because we, as an audience, are fully aware that Jom was cheated on by his boyfriend in the present time, then he travels to the past and encounters this man (whom he has previously seen) and of course, he's shocked (both of them are since Khun Yai dreamed about Jom). You just can't expect a relationship to happen in the very first episode, that's not realistic, that never happens. This actually reminded me when Step By Step was airing and everyone kept complaining that "nothing" happened between the two mains, and the plot was slow, and people just stopped watching it. You really need to understand how relationships work: it takes time, and we need to follow the development, we need to feel those moments between the characters. The problem here is those really cringy, bad bl series with zero plot, terrible acting, and obviously having explicit s*x scenes in every episode, that made people forget about enjoying a great story and just consume any garbage content just for the sake of it, and I'm not going to make a list about those bad bls or those terrible actors because you all know who they are. The second one, do you really think Jom never showed his feelings towards Khun Yai? Once again, this is a character that has just been cheated on and got his heart broken by his long-time boyfriend. And let's not forget that this is an adaptation from a novel (yes, I read it), and every time a written work gets adapted into a series (or film) there are always going to be changes and situations in which all the production team has to work to make it as close as possible to the novel, but not the same in its entirety. Someone on Reddit said that they were happy because even though some scenes were changed from the novel, the dialogues were all the exact same and they were faithful in that sense, and I completely agree. Now, if you are saying that Jom doesn't show any emotion, you are coming for Nonkul's acting and I won't tolerate that. This drama has cast two of the best Thai actors in the industry. Both actors even said that they read the novel, and did plenty of research and preparation for their characters. So, no... you are not going to come for these two boys, because they are the best you will ever see.

And now, let's see some examples in which we can see Jom (slowly) growing feelings for Khun Yai: This already happens in EP2. Khun Yai looking so worried, asks Jom if he's feeling unwell and touches him so gently. Just look at Jom's face... I bet his heart made a jump because I know my heart would stop at that moment.

And what about the very next moment? Khun Yai: "It's like you've lost your blessing. Please, let me bring it back for you." (The softness in his voice...)

And Jom looks dazzled the whole time because he has this gorgeous gentleman talking to him like this, caring for him... Anyways, let's go to EP3. The scene in which Khun Yai tells Jom that he's buying clothes for him and Jom is surprised by this. And then, Khun Yai goes: "Do you like it?" (referring to the shirt)

And I bet Jom's brain was like: "Are we talking about the shirt... or you?". He just stares at Khun Yai like he's hypnotized (like more than 5 seconds, I'm not kidding). And what about this whole scene? Khun Yai: "If remembering makes you sad, just forget about it completely."

Here we have Khun Yai once again talking in his ever-soft voice (Bright's voice is just beautiful) and comforting Jom, knowing that he's suffering and having hard times, and Jom just takes and absorbs all this care and affection coming from the other.

When they come back, Jom thanks Khun Yai, he's grateful for everything, you can see it in his smile, and his eyes, and he exudes gratefulness. And then we see him looking at the bracelet that Khun Yai gave to him, and thinking about him... like come on, at this point we all know that Khun Yai is blooming in Jom's heart.

Right, let's jump to EP4. Jom becomes Khun Yai's majordomo and we have the scene in which Khun Yai shows Jom his new room. Khun Yai: "So now we're living under the same roof, Jom."

Look at him! He looks nervous and shy, taking in the fact that he's going to live with his crush and be with him 24/7, like imagine being as lucky as Jom... the boy is internally screaming.

The next scene, when Khun Yai is helping Jom with the typewriter, and Jom makes a mistake.

Khun Yai stops him by touching him and Jom's brain just stops working. My boy is gone, he just stares and stares.

And then, we have the scene in which Jom is helping dress Khun Yai. Jom: "So, why did you have to help me that much?" Khun Yai: "As I said earlier, I just want to choose what I want, and go by my wish sometimes."

LOOK AT HIM! HE'S GONE! WE LOST HIM! And besides he understands what Khun Yai is trying to say, Jom is no fool.

Khun Yai leaves and we see Jom like this: he's touching his face (an indicator that his face is probably burning) and he's internally screaming, please at this point we can feel Jom's sincere feelings.

Let's go to EP5. In the beginning scene, Jom sees things from the present time, and he starts screaming. Khun Yai makes his appearance, he's worried and he knows Jom is having a hard time once again. I want to emphasize how Khun Yai is in a drunk state in this scene, but that doesn't stop him from being the same gentleman, and comfort Jom in every possible way.

Khun Yai: "Jom, you're here with me. Just think of this as another home." (I screamed)

The entire scene is chef's kiss. Khun Yai's soft and caring voice, massaging Jom's forehead in an attempt to make Jom feel better and get rid of any negative feelings and thoughts. Caressing his face and then hugging him ever so softly, patting his head, every single gesture is just perfection, so full of affection. The silence in the scene, no need of dialogues, just them loving each other, and Jom being completely gone. He's completely aware that he likes Khun Yai.

Okay, EP6. We have a (very) jealous Khun Yai avoiding Jom and treating him kind of indifferently. In this scene, Jom looks hurt and worried that Khun Yai may be angry at him, and he basically makes Khun Yai explode.

Khun Yai: "Don't you know how I feel about you? Did my actions not reach your heart at all? Or should I write you a long poem? Or in what way should I tell you so that you can understand how I feel about you?".

Imagine your crush advancing to you like this... saying all those words... Jom was speechless, breathless.

Moving forward, Khun Yai finally directly confesses to Jom and asks him if he wants to be with him, and Jom agrees. I loved how Jom didn't reject him but explained to him that he was scared and worried about them becoming lovers and making Khun Yai's life difficult because of his family and society in general. Let's not forget that Jom comes from the present time in which until today LGBTQ people are still chased and k*lled, rejected, and seen as abnormal (I personally felt his speech because I'm bisexual and I know it's hard). And Thailand is still a conservative country in which gay marriage is not allowed, so like I said before: Jom is no fool and he's aware of the whole situation. But... love is stronger and our boys become a couple, and if after all this people still think that Jom has zero emotions or doesn't express himself... just go watch your empty bls in which the characters "fall in love" in the first five minutes like the most unrealistic thing ever.

I want to say that Khun Yai is the greenest flag ever, and Bright & Nonkul's chemistry is out of this world. I hope they work together again in the future because they are the perfect duo. Anyways, to all IFYLITA fans keep spreading the love and enjoying the best bl of the year, we can't wait to see these boys taking all the awards.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

::avoids flying newspapers:: Top 5 BL microexpressions!

HOW DARE YOU! THIS IS SO HARD!

You know what? Just for that:

Nishijima as Shiro and Uchino as Kenji in What Did You Eat Yesterday? Season 2

gif by @my-rose-tinted-glasses

The way this moment just absolutely sucker-unched me in the chest. The deep sigh, the slight smile that is threatening to pull at his lips, THE FUCKING TEARS IN HIS EYES. MAYBE HE SHOULD MAKE TWO CHICKEN THIGHS TONIGHT, TURTLE, MAYBE HE SHOULD MAKE TWO CHICKEN THIGHS.

The way Kenji is having trouble processing exactly what is happening right now. This is literally a dream come true for him. This is a tangible, physical, real sign of Shiro's growth in their relationship. Tangible, physical, real proof that Shiro loves him, and you can tell how overwhelmed Kenji feels by this while Uchino's face barely moves. THEY HAVE MATCHING APRONS, TURTLES!!!! MATCHING APRONS!

Suar as Saengtien in La Pluie

gif by @piningintrovert

I cannot for the life of me find a gif of the microexpressive moment i actually want, when Tien is watching the video that Lomfon made and his jaw kinda drops ever so slightly in anger, it's fucking incredible, Suar is a fucking incredible microexpressive actor. But because I can't find that moment, please enjoy the babiest little lovesick eyebrow furrow the world has ever seen. I also just want to note that Title had some killer microexpressions in La Pluie as well, but the best examples of have no gifs :(

Inukai as Yutaka and Iijima as Minoru in Our Dining Table (aka Bokura no Shokutaku)

gifs by @bellepark

The worlds smallest peaceful, happy, contented smiles. I love them so much. Our Dining Table is absolutely packed full of micro-expressions, and I love that for it and love it for that!

Film Thanapat as Charn in Laws of Attraction

gif by @tinnchan

The disgust, the anger, the incredulity, the retreat all from a fucking eye blink and swallow. Film is next fucking level, especially if you compare even just how he smiles in Khun Chai as Tian with how his smiles as Charn in Laws of Attraction. That man can be a completely different person with the same exact expression on his face from his eye shine alone.

Jet Somjet as Q in 7 Days Before Valentine

gif by @pharawee

This show is by the same director/screenwriter as 180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us as such I have high doubts that this will actually end up being remotely close to a BL, but I have been really impressed and interested in Q as a character because he's not super expressive, especially in contrast to Sunshine but there is such a heaviness and grief to him.

Bonus: Chimon as Sailom in Dangerous Romance

gif by @jimmysea

Just cause I don't think 7 Days Before Valentine is going to end up being a BL, I'll do an extra. Full disclosure, I did not like Dangerous Romance and I dropped it before it finished airing, but Chimon did an incredible job looking disassociative at the end of Episode 2, and I am impressed by the singular eye twitch that acknowledges that Sailom is reactive to pain stimuli.

Not a BL so I'm not really gonna add anything about it here, but I just want to say that Singto is the King of Microexpressions and I was incredibly impressed by how much I got out of Dan in Shadow with just the slightest movement of Singto's ear.

ASK ME MY TOP 5 OF ANYTHING BL 2023

[pharawee]

Star Hunter's line-up for 2023 (and 2024) was exactly what they'd previously announced and tbh that made sitting through the whole thing actually quite enjoyable and to the point - even if I had to watch the livestream on facebook (apparently it's on youtube too but it's on madan.fun's channel so I didn't know until later).

Now Star Hunter is slowly uploading the pilots for the 5 new series and 2 movies they announced and I've had some time to make up my mind about them.

TRUE MOON | เดือนหลงเดือน 

Star Hunter wouldn't be Star Hunter without their uni BL and campus moons, so this is probably as straightforward as it gets: Poor boy hates rich boy but then they fall in love and have to overcome many obstacles. Personally, I'll never get tired of uni BL so I'm ok with this.

CITY OF STARS | เฟื่องนคร 

Star Hunter has unlocked a new trope: actor/manager BL - but this one comes with a twist: While one of them is an actor, the other guy has been tasked to... tbh I'm not even sure because the subs on the livestream were wonky and they're missing in the yt vid. The other one's a programmer for an app and apparently the actor's so famous that he breaks the app so the programmer gets sent to Thailand for few months (he's the only Thai dude in the whole company, you see) to somehow fix the problem. Oh, but also the actor is his neighbour? And then his manager gets sick so the programmer has to step in. Love ensues. Sounds good, I'm in.

SUNSET VIBES | เพียงชลาลัย

This is the new mosbank series we've been waiting for, and from the whole presentation it's clear that mosbank is now Star Hunter's new main attraction. The series itself is really intriguing. For one, it's beautifully filmed, with beautiful and almost traditional-sounding background music. It starts with a one-night-stand that quickly turns into "oops I got railed by my new boss the night before I started my internship" - but there's a mystery twist right at the end. According to what Mos said during the short presentation it's got something to do with Isan (Northeast Thailand) folklore and possibly past lives so this is going to be really good (I am completely unbiased of course).

BIG DRAGON THE MOVIE

I'm still not sure if this is replacing season 2 or a movie cut of the first season with extra scenes. My Thai is limited and all I know is that season 2 was mentioned (and Tao's actor was there). But anyway, the movie seems to expand on what happens in season 1, with a couple of extra scenes set in the past and the future, so even if we don't get a season 2 this is still going to be a treat.

FLIRT MILK | รักรสนมจืด

Ok so this one could be Star Hunter's wild card. It's a cute and chaotic BL set at (where else) university. Awkward boy meets another awkward boy and they're super different but obviously attracted to each other. But because they're so different they individually decide to change for their crush. Well, personally I hope they change back because they're really cute the way they are and also there's a severe lack of glasses in Thai BL.

ACADEX THE MOVIE

This is not a BL but it might have BL elements, I guess? Idk, the trailer didn't come with subs. From what I could gather the genre is young adult set in some kind of magical school with different houses and some sort of competition. ISBANKY is in this and tbh he's the main reason why I'm even interested in this.

LOVE SENIOR | พี่ว้ากคะ รักหนูได้มั้ย 

I was right! This is the GL version of GEN Y that you've been waiting for. It has cute engineering students! It has freshie contests! It has freshie week hazing rituals! It has cute girls in red engineering shirts that kiss! It has strict seniors falling in love with extremely cute freshies. And it probably has lots of unnecessary drama too, just for good measure.

[morkofday]

cont. from this post x for @stormyoceans ♥

My Top 5 Fashion Choices in BL 2023

i am bad at remembering certain outfits or even shirts from all the shows i've watched so i'm pretty sure not all the show-stopping ones are included, but [taylor swift voice] this is me trying~

-

I. Mork's Fart Proudly -shirt

we both probably remember when the bts picture of this shirt first dropped. i was laughing so hard my stomach hurt bc this shirt is absolutely RIDICULOUS. but then the whole episode 2 happened and i read this post about the symbolism of this shirt (by the amazing @dribs-and-drabbles), and now i'm simply enamored. i cannot look at this silly shirt without tearing up. it's so important and truly a fashion choice.

II. Puen in Stripes throughout Our Skyy 2

epitome of softness and comfort is a married man with his kidnapped adopted son wearing all his beloved striped shirts. i love all the outfits in vice versa, in our skyy and the original show, but there's just something about puen's stripes. wearing them seems to bring out his inner child, which makes me super happy ♥

III. Ai Di's oversized sweaters

feral kitten ai di dressing up in all these soft and colorful sweaters, sweatshirts, and hoodies is probably the best fashion choice any bl has ever made. truly shows how you shouldn't judge anyone from the way they look. ai di might look like a babygirl but he can actually kill you, no questions asked.

IV. Mew as Daddy's Lil Monster

unhinged revenge era mew was something else. he was living his best slutty life. was he heartbroken and a hazard to society? maybe so. but he was also serving absolute cunt. i honestly think all the outfits mew wore post heartbreak were absolutely stunning (black tanktop my beloved), but this one takes the cake. there was really something about the cropped shirt and collar, right?

V. Ray's fashion sense in general

lbr ray is the true fashion icon of this show. the stylists were popping off with him. man hasn't made a bad fashion choice in his life. bad life choices, sure, but at least he looked good while making those. you will never catch him slipping. sipping? uh... too soon?

Bonus: Khatha and his butterfly shirt

this is technically not a bl but in my heart it is, so don't even start. i just thinks it's insane for a show to put a guy dealing with killer moths in a slutty butterfly shirt. he was serving Looks. i was on the floor. i don't care that ppl are dying, can he walk around some more so i can stare again-

-

please let me know some of your favourites monica!!

[absolutebl]

Best 23 of BL 2023 - Quirky Awards

SHOCK & AWE AWARDS

1. Biggest BL surprise of 2023:

The last 3 months of 2023 in general got my biggest WTF award.

GMMTV fielding OffGun AND TayNew in the same quarter while also airing Last Twilight (arguably one of their best BLs ever)

That they ALSO optioned 3 JBLs

That there's a high heat omegaverse BL staring Pavel

That there were 20 BLs airing and none of them Korean.

With 5 VAMPIRE BLs announced for next year

But my prize in this category goes to My Dear Gangster Oppa.

It's just crazy:

Thai talent, Korean money + IP (this is adapted from a manwha) airing on a Chinese channel (iQIYI). Plus it was GOOD and made smart reuse of a pair who richly deserved it. I'm delighted by the eclectic insanity of this production. And wonder if any other film genre could even do anything like this.

2. The “that country did WHAT?” award:

The 8th Sense from Korea?!

I mean, seriously?! Dealing with metal health, suicide, darkness, therapy, age gap, & first time love BUT FROM KOREA? And then openness and casual boyfriend physical affection? What's next? An actual hard fought coming out narrative with an HEA? Gay domesticity and families?

Careful Korea, you'll strain something. Possibly your own culture and film industry.

I should stop having expectations of Korea, they keep surprising me.

Runners up: Korea letting OnlyOneOf do Bump Up Business not to mention that OmegaX thing. AND Korea adapting Why R U? What are you up to, Korea? Qua? Is this a coded message? Should we send help? Do you need snacks?

3. Biggest casting whoa! where did you come from? award:

GeminiFourth in My School President.

Seriously? Babies what? How did GMMTV find you? How do you exist? How is BL this lucky?

4. That studio did WHAT now? award:

GMMTV putting EarthMix into Moonlight Chicken.

And then doubling down with G4 as the damn sides.

Fucking genius.

5. I’m sad you were ignored award:

Destiny Seeker.

It's just a really fun little Thai pulp, the pairs were good, silly dialogue, plus consent and other good rep. I enjoyed it. No one talked about it AT ALL.

6. 2023 BL That Actually Made Me Lose My Mind Award?

Laws of Attraction. -The casting, the crazy story, the soapy drama! But specifically: Film playing Charn - the range of his smiles alone. GLORIOUS

I mean I Feel You Linger in the Air also sparked something in me, but LoA drove me actually nuts.

NARRATIVE AWARDS

7. Best story 2023:

La Pluie

I know, you're surprised, right? At the time I didn't chat much about it but I really enjoyed the discourse others were having. I love anything that really examines the fated mates (soulmates) trope and the idea of "the one". What a clever way to do that. (This is one reason UWMA is my favorite Thai BL.)

This one reminded me of the way Color Rush approached allegory and that's no bad thing. Such an impressive little piece.

8. Best narrative structure 2023 award:

Unintentional Love Story.

I know this may seem a simplistic pick. But I love the tidiness of this no frills contemporary romance, how the culture of work and personal ethics and corruption fight against the main character's affection and integrity. Poor baby boy is driven into a corner and then punished for it. But it is punishment he feels he deserves, and so it is up to his (now) ex to figure out what went wrong and why.

It's just great. I love it when no one is stupid or wrong, it's just impossible circumstances and unintentional love deeply felt.

9. Best 2023 dialogue (script) award:

Jun & Jun

Never before has Korea laced a BL with that much perfectly executed innuendo. It was a master class. I didn't know you could be that lascivious in Korean, quite frankly. Plus the way the 2 Juns constantly seamlessly transition between formal register (work, public - where they are boss/employee) to informal register (when they are alone and age mates + childhood sweethearts).

Beautiful to hear and watch.

10. Favorite scene 2023:

The dub con scene in I Cannot Reach You because I AM TRASH for an out of control seme. I'm sorry I just AM.

I have said it before, I will say it again, NO ONE DOES THIRST like Japan. And when that thirst bubbles over, it is heart-clenching and very hot.

11. The most rewatchable BL of 2023 award:

Our Dating Sim

That scene where they lie on the floor + the stolen kiss + giggle? Come on, it should be on comfort repeat in war rooms. It could bring world peace.

ACTORS & CHARACTERS AWARDS

12. Best performance of a queer actor in a leading role, 2023:

Fluke in Make a Wish.

It was fun to see him as an irreverent immortal and while I love OhmFluke I also really enjoyed this new pairing. It was a genuine pleasure to watch.

13. Best pining 2023:

The moot pining in Tokyo in April is...

Boys, seriously? Japan must you destroy us like this? Hurts so good.

14. Best wingman 2023 (The Namgoong Award)

Tiw from My School President

I mean, come on, of course it's him!

(Also can you believe Mark went on from this to do fricking Only Friends!? To Last Twilight! Come on GMMTV GIVE HIM A LEAD!)

15. Biggest OMG I LOVE you boys together, YAY!

Dimpled McMafia & Feral Bunny Foo Foo from Kiseki Dear to Me.

They were feral for each other.

We were feral for them

It was a whole delightful THING.

16. Most unexpected return of a BL pair? award:

The Private Lessons pair showing up in Love Class 2.

I know it was only a cameo, but SERIOUSLY? Thank you SO MUCH Korea! A big studio picking up a Strongberry pairing? I love you.

Seriously tho between them, Taiwan & Korea tried for ALL THE CAMEOS this year.

17. Well aren't you two just the prettiest? award:

NetJames in Bed Friend.

Need I say more?

18. LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD

Bah Vinh in Vian & Mr Cinderella 2. I did like either show but I loved him in them. Especially the make outs.

Yes you have chemistry with all the boys in Vietnam and you kiss beautifully. But it's okay now honey, you have the crown. Relax, you're stressing us out.

RANDOM PICKS

19. Favorite Linguistic Moment of 2023:

Our Dating Sim

Caught in the act by the elevator scene. OMG it's so funny. They're being such boyfriend shits to each other, and to be caught in the act by THAT character, and try to manifest formal language whole cloth? Hilarious.

Honorable mention to War Peanuts in Destiny Seeker.

20. Biggest disappointment of 2023:

You Are Mine

Seriously Taiwan, AGAIN you disappoint me with an Office BL? You're Taiwan, land of offices and suits. This should be YOUR SETTING TO WIN. And yet... argh. I mean it wasn't bad. But it wasn't good either. Stop it Taiwan, do better.

Runners up? Between Us, Chains of Heart, Dangerous Romance - this was a HOTLY contested category.

+ 2 Winners in the sub-category of FUCK YOU FOR THAT ENDING award:

The Director who Buys Me Dinner - I mean this nicely but: you have your lane now Korea, stop hurting us, that's Japan's responsibility and they do it better.

I Feel You Linger In the Air - I'm just hugely disappointed. Thailand ALMOST got its second 10/10 from me, but that damn ending.

Argh.

21. Best Wardrobe/Prop Use 2023

The shower of packaged bedsheets in My Personal Weatherman

Amazing. Brilliant. No notes.

22. Best Queer Rep 2023

Chot in Step By Step

In fact, all the queer characters in this show were treated with great integrity.

AND props to this cast for refusing to do fan service. GOOD FOR YOU! Fuck those sasang wankers.

Runners up? The found family cast of Love in Translation and the Rainbow Rice Cakes in The New Employee.

23. Best Meta Trope call out

Tin Tem Jai

Come on, what a zinger, but at themselves (and Taiwan)

Final question: which of the 23 was the hardest for me to pick?

Honestly? Question #1 this year. But also question #20.

(Last year: 2022's Version) 

Remember I only pull from shows that were completely finished by the end of 2023. Or The Sign probably would have taken multiple categories. But it will fall into 2024 offerings.

(source)

[rocketturtle4]

To Sir With Love, a Reflection

What is Love and What is Duty?

MAJOR SPOILERS

ALSO TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR SUICIDE (briefly mentioned)

The way family love is framed in this show, sparked a lot of reflection and made me realise how un-nuanced some of my thoughts about love have been. (This also made me realise how engaging I find generational family trauma in stories like this so thanks @lurkingshan for answering all my questions).

(This post follows the journey of my thinking so it’s a bit choppy, skip to Duty vs Devotion Vs Love if you want the outcomes bit)

During my initial thoughts about this show I stumbled across @waitmyturtles big meta on: Pain, Suffering, and Narratives in Some Asian Dramas/BLs and it definitely impacted my thinking so go read that.

What struck me as particularly odd (on a personal level) was the idea that western parents are conditioned to love their children. Turtles uses these phrases as examples of a common Western Experience

“There is NO WAY your parents don’t love you.”

“There is NO WAY your parents will ever give up on you. Even if they treat you badly, they love you.”

“In the West, we ALWAYS end up loving our children. That’s what society demands of PARENTS. We’re CONDITIONED to be like that.”

And uh What? *checks own brain* that doesn’t seem right fitted to my experience? (I come back to this at the end, promise)

Now, the point that Turtles goes onto make about Asian family structures is deeply meaningful and poignant (Summarised very briefly, by her, as:

“The equation is: even if you suffer at the hands of your parents, even if you don’t receive unconditional love and empathy from your parents, you must sacrifice in order to respect and serve your parents”)

GO READ IT IT’S BEAUTIFULLY MOVING AND IMPORTANT

However, part of the reason I feel this is relevant is because I DID NOT assume that Tian’s parents (Or Yang’s parents for that matter) loved him going into this show.

I am not quite sure where my own frame of thinking, (of parental love is not an automatic assumption) comes from, now that I know this isn’t standard, I’ll be looking into it further, but I felt it was important to start with this frame because I’ll be talking about the way this drama reshaped my thoughts on love, especially familial love, thus my starting point seems important.

SO

Prior to about episode 14/15 I would have argued that neither of Tian’s parents loved him, they only loved the idea of him. (A literally line I thought to myself as I watched)

Li’s (Tian's mum) arc was the most impactful so I just want to give a quick rundown of the stages I went through and then I will be talking to some of these stages, with reference to Li (Mum), Song (Dad), Yang (brother) Chan (Wife 2, Yang's Mum), and Bua (Wife 3):

Stage 1 (most of the series): She (Li) doesn’t love her son, her love died when she realised he was a homosexual and everything since then has been about his conformity and power for herself.

Stage 2 WHAT, Maybe she does love her son

Stage 3 OH she definitely loves her son (SO WHYYY?)

Stage 4 Maybe she loves his son despite him being gay, rather than accepting him as a whole?

Stage 5 No she doesn’t even seem that specifically hung up on the homosexual, just his safetly

WAIT

Stage 6 Was all this…protective did she actually love him the whole time??? WHAT THE FUCK

Thus reflection:

Stage 1 (some initial thoughts)

Turns out my view on love is (or was?) rather black and white: to love someone & to hurt that person knowingly and intentionally were two concepts I viewed as mutually exclusive: Li hurt her son both physically and mentally on a regular basis and so from my initial standpoint she could not love him. (very unnuanced) (for the record, I'm not saying love and hurt are mutually exclusive (lol) but that I thought love and ongoing intentional hurt were)

In some ways I believed (emphasis on past tense) Song's love for Tian was greater than Li’s but that his love was also false due to a lack of knowledge.

Yang is the bestest bro but we’ll get back to him

Question: Did I really believe that all the actions Li took to protect Tian’s secret were not born out of love while she actively murdered people? Yeah kind of.

I had ascribed her a very similar motivation I ascribed to Chan: She wished to remain as the first wife and retain power and thus needed her son as the next head, discovery of his secret would end this possibility, so it must be kept secret at all cost.

I did not even ascribe her fear for her son’s death as a possible motivation which retrospectively seems very odd. My bias towards Li as unloving is why I had the whole opening section of this post.

Stage 2-4

I think part of the change in my thinking began not with Li’s actions towards Tian, but with Li’s interactions with Song midway through the show.

Song knows of Tian’s secret (but not what it is) and implores Li to tell him (and implores Tian to tell him but that’s not discussed here even if it was at that moment, I decided I hated him) and it is very clear that Li, really WANTS to tell him,

She wants to preserve their marriage.

She wants to give back the honesty he’s asking for,

BUT she never even considers actually doing so because to do so would condemn her son.

That she sacrifices her relationship with her husband to protect her son’s secret was the first rock to really put a dent in my un-nuanced take on her characters motivation.  

A lot of things happen from here, but Li throwing herself in front of the police officers and begging them to take her instead was definitely the final straw that shattered my perceptions.

But hold on, I’m getting ahead of myself

Stage 5

The societal and familial homophobia woven through this story and most strongly represented by Song is also a key part of this reflection.

The fact that Song grieves his brothers death, grieves for the brother he was closest too, grieves for the breakdown of the five families that they’d built and STILL VIEWS SAID BROTHER AS LESS THAN A MAN FOR BEING A HOMOSEXUAL was feckin INSANE.

But it was also the reality of what I’d been imposing onto Li. This is the kind of (not)love I ascribed to her.

Song didn’t truly love his brother for who he was, only who he knew him to be. And if knowing something fundamental makes you view that person as less, then, in my opinion, you never really loved them in the first place. You don’t love them, you love your own perception of them. You don’t love them, you love the idea of them.

(Look at Song here, reinforcing my black and white thinking, no wonder this show got me all twisted around).

Now Li on the other hand arguably doesn’t believe that being a homosexual makes her son automatically less.

Does she believe that he needs to supress this part of himself to become head of the families? Yes,

BUT, I would argue that this is more to do with her knowledge that he’ll definitely be unable to inheret due to Songs views (and may be kicked out of the family/die) than any personal belief of his unsuitability.

She views him as competent DESPITE his homosexuality, this is something that is hidden for his safety, more than for making him less of a man.

(I am not saying this is okay, just unpacking the different motivations as I understood them, and given ep 1 she KIND OF HAS A REASON)

I'm also not saying she's not homophobic (There is also her view that he can ‘be fixed’ as seen in her repeated attempts to get him to sleep with a woman in case he realises he likes it. Which is messed up, but again NOT my primary point.)

Stage 6

Turns out she loves him a ton after all:

She throws herself in front of the police

She planned to commit suicide (yes to absolve herself of her wrongs for some religious adjacent nuance I didn’t fully understand as a western viewer but also to ensure that her wrongs didn’t negatively impact her son’s future)

She sacrifices her husbands trust in her (as mentioned earlier)

She would sacrifice who she is in her sons eyes (someone he does love) to secure his ideal future (as she see’s it).

She loves her son and this love comes out in what I have reframed for myself as Devotional love

Duty vs Devotion vs Love

Duty is, I think, what we often see framed as love or love adjacent in the families portrayed in Asian drama’s, at least to Western viewers.

Children are taught they have a duty to their parent’s ABOVE ALL ELSE

Above love

Above self-care

Above other relationships

This is what their parents expect from them.

This is what’s framing their parent’s investment in their lives.

Duty WITHOUT love is, in my opinion, what we see discussed in turtles post with the examples of “Non’s father in Dark Blue Kiss; or Korn’s father in Double Savage; or ESPECIALLY Uea’s mom in Bed Friend”

Do these children love their parents? I have no earthly clue

Do these parent’s love their children? I would say no, but that doesn’t change the fact that as their children they must be DUTIFUL.

Devotion is then the intersection of duty and love, it is love with expectations. My current thinking is that many child-parent relationships in Asian dramas, especially child to parent, fall firmly into this category. How much emphasis is placed on duty over love seems to link with how damaging that relationship can be.

Li’s love for her son falls into this category, her love is for her son but her duty is for his future position and safety and this is of highest value to her, higher than her love for who he is.

This is a thread I definitely notice in Asian dramas, she is not duty without love as mentioned above, she is not “rooted in judgement against her offspring” (again from turtles) to the exclusion of all love, but this does colour her raising of him in a way that is significantly traumatising.

I think it is possible that Dad in Khun Chai may have reached this level of judgement if he had discovered his son’s secret (in a less extreme situation) and Li knows this, and so must keep him safe.

Though in the end he sees this too:

Yang & Tian

Now, Devotional love is something I also want to talk about in the context of Yang and Tian because I feel that the kind of love Yang has for Tian is different to the kind of love Bua has for both boys and this is the only way I can articulate how.

It's also important to know that duty often forms a part of a relationship that involves commitment (family or otherwise) so I am not saying devotional love is bad.

Despite Chan's best efforts, Yang grows up devoted to his older brother, we see this COUNTLESS times through the drama, and it was undoubtedly my favourite part.

Yang’s love for Tian is unconditional and certain, his realisation that Tian is gay leads to his desperate search for, and hug of his, brother, because he IMMEDIATELY recognises how hard that must be.

It does not alter how much he loves his brother

It does not make him think of his brother as different or less

If anything it increases his determination to keep his brother safe.

This Protectiveness leads his love further up the scale into Devotion

Yang’s love felt very devotional to me because he loves his brother and acts as if it’s his duty to protect him (despite being younger).

We see this in his taking of punishments for Tian

In how he searches for answers to the murder and then only tells Tian about it after talking to Pin as he initially believes protecting Tian is more important than anything else

(I have not got to talk about Pin, but I would argue Tian’s love becomes less devotional (less lead by duty in the form of protectiveness) as:

He shifts to being the caretaker of Pin as well

Jiu is introduced into Tians life

This combination (especially Pin) leads him to treating Tian with more autonomy.)

A key difference, even at the start of the show between Li and Yang’s devotional loves is the focus of their duty.

Li’s is to Tian’s future

Yang’s is to Tian

Yang's duty to his parents (especially his father) is much less (or at least shown as less important) than his duty to his brother.

Tian

I'm not going to talk about Tian's love

ITS ALL FRICKEN SACRIFICIAL @colourme-feral

Boy needs to care less about his duty.

(Sacrificial = Extreme Duty + Love)

Bua

Bua’s love and acceptance of Tian (and of Yang) felt different to Yang’s love and acceptance of Tian and this a key part of helping me frame the duty vs devotion vs love

To me, Bua is the best example we have of love without duty (or with minimal duty at least), her (literal) separation from the family due to infertility (she lives in a different building) leads to having less stakes in the whole game. She loves the boys, but she does not believe anything is more important that them being themselves. Duty is not part of her relationship with them, and arguably, duty is not part of their relationships with her.

In my opinion, Li tries to instil a sense of duty in Bua’s love when she encourages her adoption of Tian, but it doesn’t really have the desired effect.

Bua loves them, but she also clearly loves Song and we can see (for example in the way Yang never tells her Tian’s secret and she never pressures him), that her care for others does not come with a caveat of duty. (Song pressures her though)

Did she have a duty to Song? to anyone? Would her love have lead her to the belief that Song needed to know? Ugh, honestly I have so many questions about Bua.

Side Note

Obsessional love is something different again which didn’t really feature in this drama but which my current thinking frames as possessive devotional love, (with possessiveness causing corruption maybe? Not sure).

ALSO

I feel like the duty/love scale overlaps with a lot of what we see in the portrayals of marriage on screen where duty is often put first and foremost in a way that often breaks down over time or leads to resentment but I haven’t really thought about this in detail.

What was the point of all this?

I think as westerners a key difference in family culture is the way duty is framed in parent child relationships. Having written all this I can now return to this point:

“In the West, we ALWAYS end up loving our children. That’s what society demands of PARENTS. We’re CONDITIONED to be like that.”

And, while I’m still feeling rather uncertain about the phrasing of this, I do think that societally (in the west) parents have a duty to their child RATHER THAN children having a duty to their parents (in Asian cultures)

That’s what feels the most different to me, and I think often expectation of care (duty) is framed as love, you're expected to care for your children and thus you must love them.

But parents don't necessarily love their children even when they care for them. Doing your duty is not the same as loving,

its still causing me a bit of disconnect, so maybe it’s causing disconnect for other people as well.

I’m not sure how realistic my duty to love scale is, but I wanted to chronicle the ways this show shaped my thinking, in the hopes other shows will change my thinking in new ways.

I am very keen to view other shows on @lurkingshan’s generational trauma challenge and see how my thinking continues to grow.

Also I loved this show like crazy and gave it 94%, equal 10th out of 76 shows. Go watch it if you haven't.

[lazzarella]

I started watching Asian BL series at the end of January this year, so I'm still pretty new to them, but I thought it would be fun to post my top 10 so far, and then check in every now and then to see how it changes! At this point I've watched around 38 series, not including specials, etc. (16 Thai; 11 Japanese; 10 South Korean and 1 Taiwanese)

Anyway, the current top 10:

1. My Personal Weatherman (2023, Japan)

I've watched this 5 or 6 times now! Miscommunication (or, even better, total lack of communication) is one of my biggest weaknesses! I live for it! I often hate when characters talk their feelings out too soon (or sometimes at all lmao), so this is like... perfect for me! And their dynamic was so delicious too

2. Moonlight Chicken (2023, Thailand)

This was my first BL and so it was also my introduction to EarthMix (who I'm now obsessed with). It's always nice to see adults falling in love, but I think the contrast with young love was really nice too! But I definitely preferred the JimWen plot. Earth did a great job of embodying a character ten years older than he is and Mix was great too and I love how everyone actually looks sweaty and it's just a really beautifully made series

3. KinnPorsche (2022, Thailand)

This was the first BL series I ever heard of, I think! But I couldn't figure out how to watch it in 2022 for some reason, so it took me a couple of years to get there lol I'm going to be honest, it's not what I was expecting at all! Everyone kept talking about how dark and fucked up it is, but it's so funny and goofy!!! Like, there are dark elements, but the delivery overall is very silly to me (in a good way), and it's honestly one of the funniest things I've seen in my life haha and the romance between Kinn and Porsche is everything, really

4. Cherry Magic (2023, Thailand)

I did watch the Japanese one first and adored it, but there's something about TayNew and what they bring to these characters and romance that really had me hooked. Plus I prefer Jinta to Tsuge XD but this is just such a sweet and heartwarming show ;__; I wish it hadn't had the copyright issues because it's kind of a PITA to rewatch

5. Boys Be Brave! (2024, South Korea)

Full disclosure: I didn't care for the side couple but I'm OBSESSED with Jinwoo and Kisub. They're both low key weirdos and there's nothing more I love than weirdos finding love in each other! Plus, they're opposites attract, another favourite of mine. It's a very cosy and comforting series

6. Old Fashion Cupcake (2022, Japan)

Hit me right in the rapidly approaching 40 feels! I just... It's just gorgeous. Just so lovely! The romance is beautiful and it looks beautiful and the acting is beautiful! BEAUTIFUL!

7. Cherry Magic (2020, Japan)

I've found that, while I gravitate overall to the Thai shows so far, the Japanese ones make me more emotional? Maybe it's because they do the ~I'm not worthy of love thing so well. But this was so sweet and special 

8. A Tale of Thousand Stars (2021, Thailand)

There were some aspects that bothered me that kept it from being perfect, but it's a lovely story and Earth and Mix really have something special together onscreen (well, I love their offscreen interactions too haha) And I love the setting! And knowing this was Mix's first acting gig???? Incredible!

9. Cupid's Last Wish (2022, Thailand)

Didn't care for the side story with the aunt and uncle, and it gets a bit wishy washy toward the end, but I LOVE road trip stories and I love body swap and I think the way it was done here was really good. The transitions between Jan and Mix playing Win were SO well done and Earth gets to play a slightly more lighthearted character and there's a lot of lovely scenery and some cute cows! Plus, Jan and Mix are both so cute when they eat lol

10. Manner of Death (2020, Thailand)

As a life long lover of mysteries, I didn’t feel the mystery plot was particularly strong, but this series is kind of batshit and I love it. Plus smalltown mysteries are my jam, strong or not! And it has the most unhinged proposal I've seen to date

Aaaaannd that's it for now! I can easily see Wandee Goodday making its way into this list when I do an update (probably even my top 5)

Oh, but for fun, my average ratings by country:

Japan: 8.2; Thailand: 8.3; South Korea: 8.6

Which is funny because the South Korean ones have, overall, been less enjoyable for me lol but I've seen fewer so I think that the few highly rated ones have bumped the rating up haha

[feuqueerfire]

Wandee Goodday Ep 1 - 5 Live Blogging

When I watched the GMMTV 2024 Part 1 announcements, I was still going through my show slump/apathy phase, so wasn't super hyped about this show. However, as time went on and my interest in series and BLs reignited, I started anticipating this more and now I can't wait to watch this show until it finishes airing because people have been liking it so much.

I've seen Great in Manner of Death and I watched NetJames' side story in Catch Me Baby, so I didn't actually see Great much for that. I know Inn was in Miracle of Teddy Bear but I didn't watch that.

I tried watching 23.5 while it was airing but was terrible at keeping up with it weekly, I ended up practically just doing 2 small binges. BUT it's fine if I can't keep up weekly with this because I'm in the middle of some other cool show when this releases or whatever, I'll just... catch up on 2-3 eps at once when I have the chance. It's fine. I'm just watching it because it seems fun and I wanna be in on the general conversation since everybody seems to be watching and enjoying this one. I hope it holds up until the end.

Fun to see this post on reddit r/GMMTV that highlighted how Great and Inn used to have shippers back in the day lmfao and now a decade later, a main lead in a BL. The post is literally from August 1, 2023, months before the Wandee trailer, I think Inn joined around that time (while Great joined earlier).

Also fun to see them talk about how they actually became a pair. Interesting to see that Great was promised Beauty Newbie (side) and Wandee Goodday (main) if he signed and was told Inn would be the partner if he signed; I wish Inn spoke a bit about what he was promised if he signed, was it just Wandee since he's not in any other 2024 series.

Long preamble because I'm stalling until it's 12am and the new month starts so that I can finally start this because I don't wanna start it in May lmfao, 10 more minutes. I'm browsing reddit wandee posts before release and they seriously posted some cute photos from when they were shooting.

Ep 1 (June 1)

1-1

ah, Wandee's character is the one who doesn't wanna kiss?

3 Days Ago

Wandee means good day

asexual Drake (Kao) yayyy

heroic Wandee

Are Yak and Cher the same age? With Oye being older than them?

oh, Yak and Oye are brothers fr?

aw, Yak secretly meeting a girl behind his brother's back but Cher knows, that's cute, I like their teasing dynamic that still has space for them to share stuff with each other

Dee is soooo in love with Dr. Ter lol, he's wide-eyed like this O.O

is ter purposefully torturing Dee lmao does he know about Dee's big big crush

8 years?! he's had this crush for that long?

Wandee's supposed to not be the original doctor but is being asked a favour

ah, their first meeting

Waited so long to watch it that I have to go to sleep but great start

1-2

antagonistic start

Yak is so rude, please

ah, fast beating heart

"I hope we don't have to see each other again, Dr. Wandee" well

scholarship to study abroad: Dee vs Ter

Wandee's so cute with this boss Doctor too lol

waittttt Yak's definitely several years younger than Wandee right? hehe. because Wandee's a full doctor and doesn't seem he's a new one either while Yak's in his final year (may have been taking longer than graduate than usual, so maybe older than 22 but not that much older?)

Taem being paid by Yak to do his homework lol

lol Taem rejecting Yak before he even finished asking. "I'm yet to finish my delivery to your doorstep. You returned it before it reached there."

Yak getting rejected and Wandee will be rejected

1-3

I will Need Kao to get a boyfriend by the end btw

8 years ago he was a freshman, so Wandee is ~26 years old? If Thai uni starting age is also ~18

please, not Wandee literally letting out an exhale-laugh and saying "I'll let you say it again" when Ter says he likes girls

ah, the Too Vanilla comment

and chasing after Dee to ask for the scholarship lmfao

wild Dee is so embarrassing at the club, idek how I'll make it through the convenience store scene (I'd seen clips/gifset of it before but I didn't have the knowledge of their antagonistic initial meeting back then)

a chance meeting and Dee following Yak

1-4

pleaseeeeee I can't loll

the condom is actually sending me, the audacity omg

the cashier being like oh condom only? lube is essential too

ah, drunk with the trash

Room 609 (Bedtime Story? Another P'Golf show)

ah, Yak's into it as soon as he steps through the door. Wandee's embarrassing display actually worked lmfao though I guess he was attracted to him before then too

it's like 2am

Yoryak means giant?! pls

loll The Eclipse cameo

so much talk about Yak's dick goddamn

the shaking causing "Ordinary days that will never be the same again" book to fall

this part had me pausing and holding my head so much ahhh

Inn as Wandee has such wide sparkly eyes, feels like glitter effects should be on screen sometimes when he blinks. Reminds me a bit of Triage's Tol played by Tee. Also JamFilm To Sir With Love/Laws of Attraction's Film kinda.

But also Wandee's so... him being pushy like why don't you like me >:( at Ter (though he dropped that quite quickly) and then just openly following around and harassing Yak was wild lol

Ep 2 (June 1/2)

I'm trying to only watch 1 ep a day so that I don't have to wait too long for ep 6 but I also just want to binge what's out, so we'll see how long I do 1-1.25 eps a day

2-1

oh, we're picking up right where we left on - in the middle of the sex on the couch with the Eclipse playing

Wandee's insecurities + being mad about being called vanilla lol

my Akk and Ayan witness to all this

"once is enough" they keep saying things like let's hope we never meet again and once is enough, like don't you two know you're main leads in a romance drama?

Dee not giving Yak his contact

Dee fr locked that man out

they're antagonistic again

I like established Yei and Cher

lol ofc Yak spending the night is apparently uncharacteristic for him

wtf did Ter try to speak on behalf of Dee to forfeit the scholarship? let's kill him

2-2

omg let's fucking kill Ter, him using Dee's feelings for him to be like give up the scholarship for me? please? and we can def talk about your feelings after I come back <3

lol Yak really waited and schemed until he got Dee as his doctor

ah, Yak saw the convo between Ter and Dee

ahhhh Yak redirecting from almost holding Dee's hand to pretend he was curious about the pen

plssss this cow costume for his school project video

oh yeah, Yak likes Taem

I like Taem

Yak thinking of vulnerable Dee even when he's with Taem

are these two people sinister? wait, are they gonna drug Dee?

agh, scary. Personally not a fan of attempted sexual assault/rape/noncon recording or whatever else being portrayed just so our ML can sweep in and be the hero because these are serious and scary things and make me feel other emotions than just <333 yay I'm glad our ML is here to help <333

2-3

Less Expectations More Satisfaction neon lights over the bed kills me every time

pls not the freaking sponge bath at 1:30am

Yak's like already so into Dee, whelp

cuddles

I kept noticing the clock; I don't think it should've been at 1:38 by the end, maybe 1:4_

SEVENTY PERCENT?! not on the written part but on the campaign for the department that'll be voted by other doctors/nurses/etc?

hehe the cafe and P'Golf as a server, is it the same cafe as The Eclipse? Does both The Eclipse and the cafe in it exist in Wandee Goodday lol

and even in the show the character is named Golf

ah, here's the grandma

damn, Dee's parents are dead?!

2-4

okay, I'm back in the morning after having slept

Does Yak still like Taem? does he just wanna hang out with her as a friend? Does he realize that he's falling for Dee? Is he just in the habit of asking Taem to things?

oh, he's wistful so I guess he does indeed still like Taem

Dee taking care of Yak kinda and wanting to know what's wrong

woah, Direct

[Linguistics] Yak refers to Dee as Maw/Khun Maw/Doctor and Dee refers to Yak as boxer guy but right now, he used 'Nai.' I think they also use Khun with each other

the FWB proposal and establishing rules

first kiss? oh, Dee

[Linguistics] oh, Yak doesn't like that Dee refers to him as with Nai 2nd person pronouns and wants him to use his name.

omg I am so shy when watching them but have so much fun. Yak being like i like you moaning :) let's have another round and Dee being like okay but this time you have to play with my dick longer like okay, let's go, talking about what we want

loll the costumes come about because of the concern about Yak getting into a scandal?

Kao and this security guard?

the A/C service one when Ter's also in the elevator is sooo good

[Linguistics] cleaning fridge = rimming euphimism in Thai, I've learned. how fun

oh my god i love how puppy Yak is when Dee's wiping his head

damn, the mood is so romantic. almost kiss from Yak and giving him the necklace and kissing his chest. different than the more fun/sexual-tension-filled vibes of their other scenes

When I binge, I like episodes to be 40-45 mins but when I watch weekly, I'm mad that it's not 55 mins at least lol

I wanna know how old Yak is because he referred to himself as a grandpa student.

Sometimes this BL touches on interesting topics and just the whole aspect of FWB-while-we-both-have-other-crushes to kind of get over their crush and battle their loneliness is engaging on its own. It feels somewhat mature in its discussion around sex and what they each like or want. Still, it also sometimes feels immature, like the spiking (+ planning to take noncon videos of him?!) that's only there so that Yak can rescue him (the topic itself is really dark but the way they deal with it feels so... handwavy) or the scholarship being 70% popularity contest.

I don't know, I hope the narrative is coherent throughout the whole 12 eps and I continue to like it. Unfortunately, I can't hope for "Less expectations, More satisfaction" because I'm only watching this on-air because I'm expecting to love it, so I hope I don't regret that. I'm having fun so far.

Also, I guess it was indeed AJ who was also in the Eclipse because this is so funny: "I also appreciate that P'Golf's determination to make AJPloy happen is so great that she turned one character into a girl and completely created another one out of thin air."

Their short Ep 2 reaction

Look how puppy

Ep 3 (June 2)

2nd episode of the already oof

3-1

oh yeaa, i saw the 69 gifs

such a cute su su na

Yakalso has deceased parents?

cheek sniff kiss

ahh the lack of vs the acquiring of the necklace being noticed. it's like they're leaving their marks on each other (though they told their friends/family that they're just FWBs)

omg Yak is a known generous person when dating

just realized Dr. Kwan is Emi

office gossip

voice message about missing Yak... video of him doing situps to Dee... girl.

why does Yak look so confused when confronted with his own video that he sent lmfao

Dee's apparent flaw... he loves to win

Dee likes to order Yak around lol being like say you miss me and also change my lightbulb

Dee's nodding when Yak's like let's see if this works is very cute, very puppy also

3-2

oof, they mentioned last ep 2 the costs of running this gym and now they're bringing up financial troubles again

ah, and Yei doesn't want to let on how much things aren't okay + doesn't want to borrow from Cher's (presumably rich) mother

Dee the fucking clown

oh noo this kid has cancer

is the not having enough skilled physicians gonna come back?

aw, video call

the nurses all being women and feminine gay men is interesting ig

anyway ig it's fine that they're also gossipy/mean(?) since there are several other non-villainous gay/queer people in the show, although none are quite as feminine as these 2. though there aren't many women, just Taem and possibly Kwan but they both have small parts

and this is how the fake boyfriend thing starts

3-3

Dee's thinking of getting Yak to be his pretend boyfriend but like, didn't Yak not wanna get caught?

[Linguistics] I have no idea if Yak's saying "then take back your paper kha" but I wish I knew if he was or if it's just part of the word

no fr how is Dee even asking this of Yak and it's not even a real relationship!! "Please come out for this fake boyfriend stint even though you're afraid it'll affect your career"

Dee is at the gym?! girl

Yei notices Yak's necklace

[Linguistics] Okay, Yak definitely used kha when he says Doctors are rich

Dee is a menace, let the man alone!

Cher calls Yei Phi, Dee Phi, but not Yak. so he's same age or older than Yak but younger than Dee, which confirms that Dee is older than Yak (in the novel Yak's apparently 20 while Dee's 29 but that's not happening here lol)

lol cute, Yak teaching Dee how to box. i wanna take up boxing too

3-4

the way Dee grabs Yak's hand to place it on his own thigh is so good somehow

man, Dee being sad is pitiful but like Yak was extremely clear that he won't do it and Dee's the one who's chasing him and keeps asking him

oh, we're suddenly getting Dee having flashbacks to his parents' death

sharing food <3

[Linguistics] Yak using Rao as 1st person pronoun with Dee

CCTV in his room where he fucks would be crazy lmfao

not the fireworks as Yak is sufficiently convinced to be fake boyfriends. i imagine something will go wrong for him down the line though, oof

bro why are they acting like taking up the scholarship competition is some sort of challenge against the senior specifically when they were both offered the chance to compete for the scholarship by higher-ups

why are they doing all these dramatics in front of patients waiting too, bruh

naurrrr not public flower bouquet gift to show people that Dee indeed has a bf T.T I don't wanna press play, I actually cannot with anything public esp when it's not fake and played up like this T.T

Yak is instantly recognizable to the patients, girl I hope this doesn't have a blowback on your boxing career, you know the traditional and masculine field which I expect has homophobic tendencies (and Yak knows it too). but also Yei has a legit boyfriend and mans was a world champion or something too, right? or are they a secret?

please, their acting

why are we doing PDA I'm skimming, finger on the forward button bc ahh embarassing

going from fake boyfriends in public to domestic FWBs cooking together in private lol alright

I kept wondering if the necklace was going to be given back when they weren't speaking and Yak was like this is over but that never happened. interesting ig

I muted the tag after episode 3, so eps 4-5 will mostly be new stuff for me, though I know some general stuff too

Ep 1: Yak saves a pathetic Dee from the trash cans. Ep 2: Yak saves a drugged Dee from those fuckers (I still don't like that they used this plot point). Ep 3: Yak saves Dee by agreeing to be his fake boyfriend after his genuine pathetic monologue about why he needs a bf and why it needs to be Yak.

I hope Dee also helps out Yak or initiates things, especially because I think the last thing he promised Yak was that the boyfriend thing won't get out of the hospital but uhh I don't think that's gonna be possible. Dee's insistence on the fake-BF thing as he ignores Yak's nos for most of the eps is blagh, but I guess it stems from his need to win. So we'll see whether he can ever "lose" to Yak or be there for Yak when he needs him or what.

Ep 4 (June 3)

55 minutes long, fun

4-1

they were pretty grown when Yak's mom died, I'd thought he'd be younger

Ter doesn't like to see Dee move on but is it for sinister reasons or for hidden feelings reasons

Dee and Yak running into Kwan dropping food off for Ter early in the morning. them living in the same condo allows for such shenanigans

[Linguistics] Dee using Ai'Yak

Ter room#: 666 lol and he's imagining the good times when Dee used give him food

eating tons of food in the show while Great was dieting/starving/dehydrated af while filming with all these shirtless scenes

Yak telling Dee about Taem, interesting. but does that mean he really wasn't jealous of Dee possibly still liking Ter? they're literally discussing Taem and Yak's crush on her now.

[Linguistics] ahhhh Dee said "You don't know how to flirt, do you? Do you want Phi to teach you?" and Yak defff uses kha with Dee sometimes, especially in a teasing moment

goddd they're practice-flirting

omgggg and Dee getting into the fake-confession as he thinks of his time with Yak

and Yak is OBSESSED with wanting to kiss Dee bruh

omg and now Dee's the one who's like fuckkkk as Yak's excited about asking out Taem

ah, Yak probably doesn't want to be a boxer and that might be why he's wanting to finish up his degree? but also mans does not do work for that degree, he pays Taem to do it lmfao

Cher being like well, idk if you still like Taem but Yak's like I'm not somebody who changes his mind easily. is that why he's still holding onto (past?) feelings for Taem even as he's falling for Dee?

plsss horny thoughts during situps

Yak is literally dizzy with horniness, that's so funny lmao

ohh Taem appears. and Yak's like :D while Dee's like :(

4-2

the music and mood change between Taem/Yak's convo vs Dee's angry boxing (but he can't even box properly so his hits are weak)

hints that Taem likes Ohm and Yak knows that Taem likes Ohm

oh nvm not even just hints lol he calls and then appears and they're coming and going together and Taem is eager in a way that she is not with Yak

i love her little 2-finger salute she does to say hi and bye

Taem also notices the Yoryak necklace lmfao everybody clocking them

"A jealous man has been sighted at the boxing club" Dee, girl... make that 2 men

Dee being speechless and uncomfortable knowing Yak's planning on hitting on Taem fr

plsss Yei and Cher spying on them in the hot spa or whatever

oh yeah, what does Kao work in again? I assumed something with sexual health because he talked about his patients sometimes going from ONS to FWB or whatever. i love you, our asexual sex and sexual health doctor

plsss her listing stuff out they've tried

her: "i tried everything, even if it's not me." him: "should i try having sex with somebody else?" i actually can't

Dee at least realizing he's getting jealous over Yak

I'm nervous that somebody at the hospital's gonna overhear their convo and know that it's a fake relationship

aksdjfl;kasdfj Kao smiling and wanting to strangle Dee when he says he promised Yak he'll help pursue his crush

ah, Kao telling Dee to hold off on his heart and not fall deeper or whatever and that def makes sense to not fall for your FWB/fake-bf who you're helping pursue his "real" crush but wrong advice for a romance drama lol

neither Yak nor Dee have armpit hair (from the sauna scene and swimming scene).

4-3

the thumbnail has them with faces really close but I don't think they've kissed actually

Yak almost kissing Dee once againnnnn girl

Ter saw them at the pool...

at least Ter has enough brains to realize it's fake lol

oh, apparently everybody at this hospital goes on break at the same time lmfao

Ter wanting Dee to wait and saying he was just confused before... stfu

glad that even though Dee kinda goes in a daze sometimes, he hasn't yet given in to Ter's manipulative tactics at all

physiotherapy lol

idek why they need to sleep in the same room or why they need to mention it in front of everybody instead of just Yei or Cher lol

oh, they're certainly orchestrating some IG stories lol it's clearly so planned bro, could've at least made it seem more casual by like having a sliver of Yak in the shot when pretending you're focused on some cool food or smth

Dee hanging out and having dinner with Yak, Yei and Cher

4-4

is him graduating Yak's mother's dream?

Dee tutoring Yak, somewhat of a parallel to Taem tutoring him

pls, even Kwan catching Ter looking at Dee's story lmfao anyway ig I feel bad for her if she likes Ter. I hope she gets over him quickly and finds somebody better

Yak boxing and Dee also cheering him on through the screen at work

and bragging about Yak to Kao lmfao

Kao being like girl... you two aren'ts fake boyfriends anymore, y'all like each other

Kao's Sleepless Sleepwear lmfaooo hey friend, can you try on these costumes for sex that I made and lmk how it goes?

Yak has a little bunny tail awww cute

Yak getting mad that Dee doesn't consider him a close friend cuteee

i love Dee sniff kissing Yak's cheek like Yak's always kissing Dee, so I like it the other way around too

okay, extra post-credit scene

omg talking about HPV vaccine and how just condoms can't prevent all STIs, we should be aiming for safer sex

Dee gets me when he calls Yak Big Doggie, I keep calling them both puppies

It's not just for Dee, it's for Yak too, we're all protecting ourselves

Yak apparently is recognized by everybody, including the nurse. and dee did say hundreds of thousands of people watch the matches live

Grandma coming over to visit next ep, heheheheheh

Ep 5 (June 3)

i'm so excited to see the grandma but not excited to be all caught up and have to wait weekly for 7 more weeks eughhhh

5-1

damn, Yak's also here with Dee to surprise the patient child? Isn't Yak himself Dee's patient too lol

they're quite familiar with each other, so I guess they've met the patient several times before

lol peeking at birthday. Also Yokyak knowing down to the minute how long they've been together... okay

P'Golf plsss "I watch [boxing] for the eye candy"

Dee being Baffled at P'Golf wanting him to take the photo of her and Yak lmfaooo it's like P'Golf has brought the two of you together and she can also tear you apart

since they've been together for 1 month (I'm assuming since the fake dating began? or around then), there are 3 months left of their deal?

I think straight up half of Kwan's lines are just saying Wandee and his bf are cute together

Kao conducting an Interview about his animal pyjamas for sex

he's giving them sex homework i'm crying

Dee loves to win and losing bothers Yak

damn, what's Yei thinking about at night? money problems?

it's strange to see them fighting and to see Yei be kind of apathetic since he's always all up on Cher

I like this because it's like even though Cher puts up a (typical in BLs) perfunctory fight and says to stop when Yei kisses up on him and hints at sex, it's not real protest because they're just playing lol and Cher's desire for Yei to initiate it when he hasn't for a few days shows that

aww Cher's 2nd time asking if Yei has somebody else or is bored of him already :( the second question seriously reminds me of LITA Sky to Prapai

they're so cuteee Yei being like how many nights do I owe you

they're wearing fucking bunny and tiger ears after presumably having sex looking at outfits for Yak that will impress Taem

Yak boutta change himself for Taem (and she still will continue to like Ohm) while Dee likes him just the way he is

grandma is so fun hehe

AND THE EARS ARE STILL ON

"keep pulling the pants up" plssss

5-2

a dick plush pillow pls

bro i'm so confused with the use of the word faen, like I thought it included Exclusivity? but the way Dee talks about Yak having a faen during that breakfast convo before finding out about Taem or here when he tells his grandmother than Yak has a faen, it doesn't seem to imply that Yak's literally cheating on his faen but nor does he mention any polyam situation or anything. why doesn't he say crush instead of faen?

Dee being like I shouldn't develop any deep feelings for him but they getting up to watch Yak sleep and crosses the invisible line...

aw, they've gotten used to cuddling

cuddling in couch and bringing up Taem, it's almost like Yak brings Taem up whenever he feels like he's liking Dee too muchor something

don't give your grandma the bunny ears you wore for sex!!

introducing your fake boyfriend to your parents when you take him to their graves while he wants to be introduced just as regular real boyfriend

5-3

ah, Yak's already implementing the outfit changes. that's legit what Ohm was wearing lmfao

not Cher following Yei

aghhh I know we're not getting answers for that this episode though because I saw somebody guessing what Yei's hiding, meaning we don't find out. and i'm not gonna just have the next episode available alksdjfkladsf >:((

gathering votes

5-4

legit laughed at the huge ass banana right after them eating the hotdog sausage thing

pls i get so embarassed/shy watching this show

they're baking together, how cute

got stressed thinking about cleaning all this flour everywhere

oof, Ter taking Kwan to the restaurant Dee took him to... He's just using Kwan right? They don't want us to like Ter right?

fitting lyrics... it's an OST right?

Yak wants to kiss on the lips and Dee's ready for it too

Yak's been taking videos of grandma and Dee and now even posting a Gooddy photo on his IG

sudden position argument WandeeYoryak vs YoryakWandee like it's a funny moment but girl y'all are already fucking, how is it a question? you know the answer

Very fun so far, I'm really enjoying it. I do wish these Thai BLs were like the het dramas that release 2x a week so that I don't have to rely on getting less than one hour a week for 2 more months.

I'm curious about their first kiss, what the Yei secret is, how they'll deal with their growing feelings, and I really hope it's all explored well and coherently pleaseeee. I can't watch a show as it airs, wait for many weeks to get to the end and have it be bad, I'll lose my shit. Wandee Goodday, I believe in you!

[halliescomut]

In Defense of Wedding Plan....or Lom, more specifically...

So, I actually don't see a lot of discourse on here about Wedding Plan...maybe I just haven't been on here as much. But also, there are a lot of deeper shows on at the moment that are tackling more ethereal ideas and Wedding Plan is more pulp-y romcom than anything else, so it's not necessarily ripe for deep discussion. But on tiktok where I'm fairly active in the BL community I have seen so much hate on this show. And I understand certain levels of frustration about the choice of storyline, but I also get frustrated because I feel like people are purposely disregarding several things.

(Editors note from right before I post this, I was going to add visuals, but I'm too emotionally exhausted now, so you'll just have to settle for the wall of text.)

I agree that it's not good, or right, or acceptable for Lom to have lied to Nuea. But there's been behavior that acts as though Lom is cheating...he's not in a romantic relationship with Yiwa!! He can't cheat on her. And yes, it does lead Nuea to believe he's at least attempting to cheat, but that's not the same. I recognize that Nuea would not feel great about his feelings towards Lom, both because of their professional relationship and what he is assuming about Lom and Yiwa's private relationship. But that's also a nuanced discussion in and of itself because Nuea knows there's something fishy going on with Lom's engagement. He doesn't know what, but he definitely suspects, I think from as early as episode 2. They go out of their way to set up in episode one his sort of sixth sense about couples with that McDonald's scene. Their intention is for us to see how observant Nuea is.

And watching this most recent episode (episode 6) as soon as Lom revealed that he fell for Nuea at Pai's wedding and said that he watched him, I knew that the comments were going to be out of pocket. It is not weird or stalker-ish to see a person that you find attractive out in the wild and look at them or watch them. That's straight up normal. I have done that. Now do I truly believe it was love at first sight? No, because I don't think you can love a person without knowing them, but this is also romantic fiction and love at first sight is literally the most common trope there is. It's also not weird or gross or stalker-ish for him to get Nuea's company contact info from Pai. If you like someone and you know that your friend has their contact info...asking them is not weird. I'd maybe be a bit iffy on a direct phone number, but a insta or snapchat name, a Line ID, that's not sus...like at all. He didn't hand over Nuea's personal address or something. And let's also remember that Prapai KNOWS Lom. They are friends. He knows that Lom is not a dangerous person, he doesn't pose harm to Nuea.

I'd also like to discuss episode 4/5...the first NC scene. I keep seeing comments about dubious consent or lack of consent altogether, and while I can agree with dubious...it's on Lom's part. When you watch the end of episode 4, Nuea isn't drunk. Like we're not given a clear shot of the table, but you see Lom with 3 empty beer glasses and drinking a 4th when Nuea shows up. Nuea you only see drink one, out of a short, mixed drink style glass, one you'd have like a Rum & Coke in, and the beverage is clear with a lemon wedge, so it's not even clear if it's alcoholic. But even if it was there are 3 total glasses like it on the table, so assuming Nuea drank all three, he'd have had to take them all back to back to back in order to be wasted after that. But beyond the context clues, his behavior does not indicate inebriation at all. He's steady on his feet, he's not slurring, there are no acting choices made that would lead one to believe he's drunk.

The fallout that comes for Nuea after that night isn't because of concerns about consent issues. It's about reconciling a destructive decision. People make bad choices all the time. They'll get caught up in an emotion, an idea, a person, and they'll do something without truly thinking about the consequences. And eventually it's morning and you have to accept the choice you made. Is it heartbreaking to watch that with Nuea? Absolutely. I cried at that scene. Pak did such an amazing job. And Nuea isn't the only one who suffers from that emotional fallout. We see the fear and distress on Lom's face when he wakes up and Nuea is gone. You can see his distress when talking to Nuea's boss. He tries to pull the rich guy privilege BS (which I will absolutely admit I hated), but she's not falling for it. After the boss learns everything, she gives Lom the contact info for Nuea's family, which again pissed a lot of people off. But again, it's not direct contact or access to him. She also knows that Nuea is in a place where he is safe and has a support system around him. Also Lom, while not a super clear thinking dude in that moment, is not a freaking serial killer and Nuea's boss is not an imbecile. She didn't just cave to Lom's puppydog eyes, and it feels kind of dismissive to me for people to act like she did.

So many people were upset that he followed Nuea to Chiang Mai...like...it's the same argument we heard about Pai for several episodes. If those things don't happen, there's no fucking show. If Lom stays in Bangkok and Nuea stays in Chiang Mai until the wedding has happened then the story just ends. And if you feel like there's no redemption for Lom after withholding the full truth from Nuea... why are you even still watching the show? Legitimately why? Because what is your expectation when you don't truly believe there's a way for Lom to be redeemed at all?

And I'll be honest, seeing the pretty dismissive reactions to Lom telling the whole story about him and Yiwa coming to the realization that their parents wouldn't be able to accept their sexuality, it really kind of hurts. I know in a lot of ways it feels easy to believe that the reason they hid it is because they didn't want to lose their inheritance, but have you considered that maybe they do love their parents? At least a little? I know that especially for many people in western audiences it seems easy and simple to say "just leave then" in response to queer people who stay closeted because of their families, but there are always going to be so many layers to that. Especially when you look at through a cultural context lens. It's really just is not that simple. Money creates a lot of privilege, that's very true. But we can also look at real life people for whom that money isn't clearing the way for them to live their life fully openly. You can literally look at PP Kritt and see that despite his privilege, fame, and familial wealth, he is still dealing with consistent societal discrimination.

I also don't love this narrative that Yiwa is being selfish. The arrangement was mutually agreed upon, by both of them. To keep each other's secrets and let Yiwa have her love. Does that seem unfair to Lom? Yeah, but he wouldn't have seen it that way prior to meeting Nuea. He wasn't expecting to ever get anything remotely close to a happily ever after, so it wasn't truly a sacrifice to him when he made that agreement.

And this also circles back to his comment about saying that he wanted Nuea even though he was getting married, because he just wanted that one moment of happiness. Is it a selfish idea? Yes, but to be shocked that a rich, privileged man exhibited selfishness is a bit much. But also, I don't think Lom was expecting to fall for Nuea. Like I said, I don't really think it was love at first sight, but lust. I think the more time he spent with Nuea the deeper he fell. I believe his intention was to have something along the lines of a fling, and that when it was over Nuea would move on from him and find his eventual happily ever after and he would settle for memories. That's part of why I think he withheld the truth even after Yiwa told him it was okay to tell Nuea the full truth. This is a man who never expected to find joy or a true partner but was willing to go to extreme's to help the person he sees as a sister have the opportunity to have her own happiness. But yeah, he's just a shitbag.

And the references to love-bombing...I hate how people have brought that term into the discussion of the last two episodes. So if you're not familiar with the term, it's become more common on social media in the discussion around narcissistic and abusive partners. It generally refers to overwhelming physical displays of affection like gifts and such, especially early on in a relationship, essentially with the intention of creating a power imbalance in favor of the narcissistic partner.

The following are the most common signs of love-bombing:

They give you needless gifts 

They’re in a rush to lock things down 

They’re always available and demanding of your attention 

They can’t take ‘no’ for an answer 

They like you better when you’re alone 

They over-communicate their love for you 

You feel overwhelmed, uneasy or off-balance 

These are not things that Lom is doing. Buying McDonalds and ice cream for someone so they know you care...that's not love-bombing, that's at best wooing. Especially when intent is part of why it matters. Lom is doing it to show he cares, to show he pays attention to what Nuea likes, not in an attempt to make Nuea feel indebted to him for said gifts (that total up to about $10). Lom isn't trying to lock things down with Nuea, he's not attempting to force Nuea to choose him. He just wants Nuea to make the decision to either choose him or not knowing his love is genuine. He wants Nuea to be making an informed decision. He does not demand Nuea's attention, at most he requests it sometimes. He takes 'no' for an answer pretty regularly. He doesn't purposely or intentionally try to get Nuea alone. 'They over-communicate their love'...this one seems iffy, but it's not about saying "I love you" to a person, it's more related to presenting that love to others to cement a relationship. Essentially trying to make it awkward for a person to say 'oh well we're not quite that serious'. And that last one...Nuea is reflective and considering of the situation as a whole, but he's not uneasy, he's not overwhelmed. You could maybe argue afraid, but not of Lom, he's afraid of potential future heartbreak. Love itself is scary. Feelings of that depth and strength are scary. Because we all know that even if that love lasts the rest of your lives, the length of your lives is never guaranteed, and loss is ALWAYS a potential outcome.

I'm not arguing that the show is without flaws, all of Mame's shows/stories are flawed. But I do feel like there was a level of expectation that seems entirely misplaced. Like, these same people who love Payu and Rain to death, had nothing to say to the reveal that Payu had orchestrated at least one instance of a run-in with Rain, a person with whom there was a far larger power imbalance, but Lom pursuing Nuea, a grown ass adult who is never afraid to speak his mind to Lom, that's too problematic???

I don't know anymore. I like the show. It has faults, and flaws, and so do it's characters, but Lom is not a fucking mustache twirling villain out to trick and capture poor, sweet, stupid Nuea. And that's kind of how it feels like the discussions about the show have been going.