#and wants me to break the rules of the rehab place and stay the night with her | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

revisionaryhistory · 4 years

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Three Days ~ 76

~*~Sebastian~*~

Will texted they had picked up the food and were on their way, no more than ten minutes out. Emma wiped down the table while I pulled out beers. She was closest so she got the door. Will hugged her, looking at me strangely, then brought the food toward the table. The women hugged and stood there talking while the door closed.

Will glanced over his shoulder and almost whispered at me, “Did you do that to her hair?”

I smiled.

“Practice more.” He started pulling things out of the bag. “And don’t let her go outside like that.”

“Stop it, Will.” Alissa pulled me into a hug.

“No offense, Pippi Longstocking. I mean, Emma.”

Emma made a face, “I don’t know who that is.”

“Don’t look it up.” Will looked at me, “Want me to teach you to French braid your girlfriend’s hair?”

“Shut up and I hate you.” Truth was, yes, I think that would be easier than her trying to teach me. Partly because she’d be doing it backward and I wouldn’t know what was going on. Partly because there was a high probability of the effort being aborted and the whole thing just being foreplay.

I was being a good boy with chicken and roast vegetables. Meanwhile, Emma had a ridiculously juicy medium-rare hamburger and fries. Emma and I both made obscene noises with our first bites. She covered her mouth and looked across the table at our guests. "We didn't eat dinner last night."

Will smirked, "We had an amazing standing rib roast with the family."

We traded stories of our evenings and Alissa filled us all in on what happened after Emma and I went home. It sounded like we'd missed a crazy after-party, but we had our own good time. We stayed talking at the table after the food was gone and I'd fetched another round of beers.

"You offered to get cocaine for your girlfriend who went to rehab for cocaine?"

I laughed, looking at one of my best friends. "In hindsight, not my best idea."

He was looking at me like I was an idiot. Shaking his head, he shifted his attention to Emma, "How long have you been sober?"

"I have no idea." I put my hand on the chair behind Emma, barely touching her. Emma made a face and looked like she was searching. "May 2007. I was sixteen."

Alissa did the math, "Twelve years."

"I never kept track because I didn't have a problem. My parents did not believe me. I was the captain of the Varsity Volleyball team. We had random drug tests. The only time I used during the season was if we had a long break. That's not addiction it's recreation."

"And you never used again?"

She shook her head, "When I got home, I was peeing in cups daily and didn't want to go back to the facility. It was a rule at Ed's and it would have wrecked me to disappoint him. We practiced year-round in college. Jimmy barely even drank. When we broke up and I moved in with Eli and Angie I really wanted to. But..." she shrugged with a smile and a sigh, "That wouldn't have been recreation or a none too original way to say fuck you to a boyfriend who cheated on me. Seemed like a slippery slope. Then it'd just been so long I wasn't interested."

I wanted to ask. "Had Keaton pulled out coke, would you have?"

She nodded, "Probably. That would have fallen under recreation. It would have been fun."

"At the risk of sounding very old."

The three of us looked at Will and said, "Too Late."

He flipped all of us off, "Emma, what you chose to do is up to you. I think an after-party with your musician friends may feel comfortable, maybe too comfortable. There'd be a risk of overdoing and you don't have a tolerance or any idea how you'll react."

I lifted my beer to my lips, "Good point". It’s ludicrous to think I wouldn't have been watching for just that. Actually, it’s not. I was pretty stoned.

Emma barely glanced at me when she got up and went around the table to get to Will. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek, "Thank you. For asking, and caring, and warning."

Will thought she was kidding. "It's been twelve years. It'll be like the first time."

She moved back, keeping her arms around his neck, "I'm being serious. Thank you. That was very sweet."

"Oh, you're welcome." He hugged her and said something that made her smile. Will rolled his eyes and smirked at me, which I knew was directed at me and not at the interaction between him and Emma. He was smiling nicely before Emma sat down. He looked at me, "Where's your laptop?"

Hell, if I know. I had it yesterday while Emma was shopping. I looked over at the table in front of the couch. Nope.

"On the chair in the office." Emma pointed toward the room.

"Thank you." I pulled on one of her braids before I went to get it.

Will pulled up a Google doc with links and notes to about a dozen places from Maldives to Bora Bora. I nixed any place with a flight over eight hours. I was traveling a lot in the next month and didn’t want to start a vacation with another long flight. We narrowed it down to three places for a variety of reasons that included too many mosquitoes and a lack of lizards. Emma liked lizards. Will, Emma, and I picked different islands, so Alissa was the final vote. She voted with me, but no one was upset with the result. The villa on Turks and Caicos had five bedrooms (one more than we needed), a pool, and a private beach. Perfect.

An hour Later Will's travel agent had us booked in and on a non-stop four-hour flight.

We updated Will's travel doc with all the information and started adding things to do. He shared the doc with all four couples, so we could add and comment. Not that we'd be joined at the hip for the whole trip, but some things were more fun in a group.

A few hours and many laughs later Will and Alissa headed home. I leaned against the door, hooking Emma around the waist, pulling her in tight. I liked how she was with my friends and was excited to have her with more of them on an island. More importantly, I liked how I was with her and my friends. I can tell the difference. I’m relaxed and everything that goes with feeling relaxed.

Right this second with Emma's body fitted against mine I was not quite as relaxed. I put my hand on the back of her neck and brought her to my mouth. Kissing her. Claiming her. Finally, letting her go. "I need to finish up some stuff from yesterday. Maybe two hours?" I said it in the form of a question hoping she'd not be angry.

She nodded quickly, "Ok." She pointed down the hall. “I'm going to finish my laundry and make the bed."

"No, we'll do that later."

"Don't be silly." She went to her toes and kissed me. "Will it bother you if I practice?"

"No, I've got a few things to watch. I'll have on headphones."

"See you in a bit." She ran her fingers down my chest letting them drift away before touching my cock. Tease. I loved her little smile as she wiggled her nosey fingers at me. "I love you."

"Love you." So damn sexy.

I made myself walk to the couch before I followed her down the hallway. Focus. Focus. Focus.

I did well for an hour and forty-five minutes when Emma came back into the room. She sat in the chair diagonal and started to read. She is doing nothing to distract me, which I find very distracting. Her ignoring me is sexier than if she was stripping. I’m sure that says something about me. For one, I’m a liar. Her stripping would be much sexier.

One hour and fifty minutes. I crooked my finger, patted the cushion next to me, and lifted my arm. Emma uncurled her legs slowly and moved next to me, settling with her back against me. She went back to reading. I pretended to pay attention to the laptop on my lap instead of the woman I wanted there.

One hour and fifty-three minutes. I ran my fingers along the skin above the collar of her t-shirt. Emma shifted a little where my fingers were on her breast. I could feel the thinness of her bra and limited my touch to the swell above.

One hour and fifty-seven minutes. I have given up restricting my exploration. I’ve decided it's time to make the decision between my fingers and my mouth a more difficult one. Her stiffening nipple approved.

Two hours. I moved her enough to allow me to put my laptop on the table. My headphones too. I pulled her over my thigh, between my legs. Cradling her in my arms, I rubbed my nose against hers before kissing her.

"Are you finished?"

I moved my hand between her legs, keeping my touch light. Barely skating over her shorts. "Enough. How was practice?"

"Fine. Laundry done too."

"Good." I kissed her, deeper and longer this time. My touch intensified.

Emma spread her legs, moving one foot to the floor, and pressing herself into my hand. "Are you finished too?"

"Not even close." I smiled, "Oh, you mean work. Yes, done with work."

"So, it's playtime?"

I felt my eyes and smile widen, "It is playtime." I pulled the tie on her shorts and wiggled my fingers into her panties. “I worked hard for two hours. I deserve a reward." I dipped a finger inside her then started circling her clit.

She curled her hips into my touch. "This is your reward."

"You bet." I licked the middle of her top lip. "I get to watch you come."

She closed her eyes and laid her head against my shoulder. "I'm going to relax and let you enjoy your reward."

"Mmm, ok."

Relaxation didn't last long. A combination of light fingering and finger fucking had her squirming, biting her lip, and licking them. I couldn't resist. Didn't want to. When I kissed her, her hand went to the back of my head and kept me where I had to keep kissing her. It wasn't a hardship and I didn’t fight.

I had to hold on tight to her squirmy body. Hard to tell which she liked better. By the time she was close, and I could tell when she was close, I was slamming into her pretty hard. In the end, it was the finger fucking that pushed her over. She ripped herself away from the kiss and shattered in my arms.

I watched.

Emma laid her head back on my shoulder. "Well."

I leaned in and kissed her chest, "Next time I ask if you want my fingers or my mouth it might be a harder decision."

She looked at me, eyes and mouth wide open, "Did I bruise your ego? Was this some sort of revenge finger banging?"

"No, but that sounds fun."

She laughed, "It does, doesn’t it?"

I lifted her over my other leg and crawled out from under her leg. "Stay here. Take off your pants."

I should have planned ahead. Emma had stashed condoms around her place. I need to do that. I had made a plan though. It involved going to find her in either the laundry room or in my bedroom, separating her from her clothes, and making love to her. Wasn't working out that way.

I had my clothes off and the condom on by the time I was halfway down the hall. I stopped dead in my tracks as soon as I saw her stretched out on my couch one leg hooked over the back of the couch the other foot on the floor. I know, I know, I know, I've seen it all before and up much closer. It doesn't matter. Beautiful woman spread out, legs wide, on my couch, with the sunlight just starting to fade. I hope to hell that never gets old and always knocks the breath out of me for a few seconds. I took a moment to enjoy the view. Emma saw me and smiled. That took my breath away too.

I knelt on the couch, kissing her ankle, and running my hand down her leg. By the time my hand was between her legs, my cock was there and I guided myself inside her. She felt incredible. Wet. Tight. Warm. Half a dozen slow strokes later I laid over her, supporting myself on my elbows. The feel of Emma's fingers on my waist almost burned, the warmth sinking into me. She held onto me, her grip tightening when I hit just the right spot. This was good, but not what I wanted, how I wanted to come. I pulled out and sat back on the couch, taking her hand to pull her over me. Emma straddled my legs and immediately took me back inside her. It was my turn to hold her waist. She braced herself with her hands on my shoulders. The apartment was silent except for the sounds of us.

Emma rode me slow and easy until both of us needed more. She picked up the pace and I guided her harder. Her kissing my neck was what triggered my orgasm. I held her down on me and as soon as I could I laid Emma back down on the couch, going down on her to finish what we'd started. It didn't take long for her to be holding onto my arm and breaking the silence with my name.

We spent the rest of the night curled up on the couch watching a movie. We laughed, kissed, and fed each other popcorn. I don't remember the last time I had such a good simple night.

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan fanfiction #fanfiction #sebastian stan X ofc #marvel actor fanfiction

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robinrunsfiction · 4 years

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Swing Life Away

Pairing: Gerard Way x Female Reader Rating: Teen Requested By: None Word Count: ~7,000 Author’s Note: This story is about about what can happen between two people whose lives aren’t turning out exactly how they planned and what happens when they turn to each other. Inspired originally by the song “Hold On To Me” by Mayday Parade, there is a full playlist here of songs that inspired this story. TWs for mentions of substance abuse and depression. Post Bullets-era AU.

Gerard sighed as he pulled up in front of the convenience store. His well worn hoodie didn’t provide much relief against the New Jersey autumn air as he hurried inside. After checking the amount of cash he had in his pocket, he got a small coffee and headed to the counter. He rocked on his heels as he waited for the person being helped ahead of him to finish. Finally it was his turn.

“Anything else?” The girl behind the counter asked as she punched his coffee into the register, then she looked up. “Oh hey Gerard.”

Hearing her say his name, he looked up as well. “Oh, hey (YN), it’s been a while,” he smiled a little awkwardly. “Umm, can I get a pack of cigarettes?”

“Yea, sure. How’ve you been? I haven’t seen any fliers for a My Chem show recently, are you guys not playing right now?”

Gerard’s eyes widened for a moment and his mouth went dry. He didn’t think he would be having this conversation today, but (YN) had been coming out to My Chem shows since the beginning and he knew she was a genuinely nice person who deserved to hear the truth. “Umm, I broke it up.”

(YN)’s jaw dropped and she started to blush. “Shit, I’m sorry, I hadn't heard, otherwise I wouldn’t have brought it up,” she replied, nervously tucking at her hair.

“It’s ok,” he shrugged, trying not to let on that he was still disappointed about the whole situation. “Ray and Frank already found other bands to play with and I got a job at the comic book store so I’m back to something else I enjoy, so it’s ok really.”

“What about Mikey?”

Gerard rubbed at the back of his neck. “That’s why I broke it up. He, umm, he's got some problems. He’s in rehab,” Gerard mumbled the last part, barely audible to (YN).

“Fuck,” she breathed, looking down at the counter in front of her.

“Yea, our parents blamed me for the whole thing and kicked me out. I’ve been couch surfing for a while, or just staying in my car,” Gerard nodded toward his beat up old car parked out front. “Sorry, I just kinda dumped that all on you.”

“No, I asked, and I understand. Shit, I’m really sorry about all that,” (YN) said as she took Gerard’s money for his purchase. “Hey, please don’t be afraid to say no because this is a crazy idea I just had, but my roommate moved in with her boyfriend because she got knocked up, and I’ve been looking for someone to split the rent with. If you’re looking for a place,” (YN) trailed off with a shrug.

“Really?” Gerard asked, eyebrows raised. He was surprised at the offer. None of his friends that he had been crashing with had offered to let him stay more than a couple days at a time.

“Yea, I mean, why not?” She shrugged. “Wanna come over and check it out tonight?”

“Sure, that sounds good, what time?”

“I get off at 6, so like 6:30?”

“Yea, I can do that,” he smiled and (YN) felt like a massive weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

“Cool, here’s the address and my phone number for whatever,” she said as she scrawled the information on the back of his receipt.

“I’ll see you tonight,” he said with a wave after pocketing the cigarettes. For once in a long time, Gerard finally had some hope that things were about to turn around.

When (YN)’s shift was over at 6, she rushed home to quickly straighten up before Gerard arrived. She desperately needed a roommate or she’d have to break her lease and be in the same situation Gerard currently found himself in, but she didn’t want to let any stranger move in. At least she knew Gerard a bit; he was always nice and fun to be around when they hung out after shows, plus he had a regular job, which was good enough for her.

Shortly after 6:30 the doorbell rang and she rushed to answer it. “Hey Gerard, come on in.”

“Thanks,” he smiled, almost a little nervously.

(YN) gave him the tour through the small house, showing him the open bedroom across the hall from her own, the kitchen, and bathroom. “As you can see, I don’t really have a lot of furniture,” she said when they got back to the empty living room. “My roommate had all that unfortunately, so I just kinda hang out in my room. I don’t have any weird rules or anything, and the neighborhood is safe, sooo yea. Rent would be $600 a month each plus utilities, if you’re interested after all that.”

Gerard looked around again. “Yea, I mean this would be great.”

(YN) let out a sigh of relief she didn’t realize she was holding. “Oh that’s awesome, thank you. I really didn’t wanna lose this place.”

“Oh yea, I understand,” he smiled his lopsided smile. “How soon can I move in?”

“Whenever you want. My old roommate had paid through the end of this month, so we’re ok there. I’ll let the landlord know and do the paperwork stuff.”

“Do you mind if I stay tonight? ‘Cause I don’t have,” he trailed off.

(YN) felt absolutely gutted when she realized he meant he'd be spending the night in his car, as temperatures dropped near freezing. “Oh, shit, yea, I can help carry stuff in if you want,” (YN) said quickly, grabbing her coat from the closet and following him out to his car.

Gerard didn’t have much with him, a few changes of clothes, a blanket, pillow, and a backpack full of cds and comics. He insisted that he was fine to sleep on the floor, but (YN) still gave him an extra pillow and a couple of blankets to make himself a bit more comfortable.

"Thanks again (YN) for letting me move in here and everything," Gerard said as (YN) turned to go. "I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate it."

"I think it's gonna work out well for both of us," she smiled as she closed the door behind her.

Gerard retrieved the rest of his belongings that weekend and got everything moved into his room. (YN) tried to give him space while he got settled, but eventually they started talking a bit more, getting to know each other as they got used to being around each other.

A few weeks later, (YN) was sitting on the counter next to the microwave when Gerard arrived home from work, the smell of fresh popcorn greeting him. “Hey, what are you doing tonight?” (YN) asked as Gerard walked into the kitchen.

“Umm, nothing, why?” Gerard asked.

“I was getting ready to watch a movie, if you wanna hang out.”

“Yea, sure,” he nodded. “What were you thinking?”

“I dunno, any of the classics that are easy to watch, like Star Wars or Back to the Future,” she shrugged.

Gerard’s eyes lit up. “I was thinking about Empire Strikes Back earlier today.”

“Well let’s watch that one then,” she nodded, hopping off the counter as the microwave beeped.

Gerard went back to his room and dropped his backpack on the bed. He opened it up and examined the bottle of alcohol he had purchased after work. He wasn’t sure why he did it, he had told Mikey that he’d get sober too, but he had been feeling so depressed lately, he thought it might help to take the edge off.

Instead, he stashed it under his desk and changed out of his work clothes and into some pajama pants and a comfortable t-shirt so he could relax. When he walked into (YN)’s room, he was reminded of the lack of places to sit other than with her on her bed. “I’ll go get my desk chair,” he said, turning to leave.

“Oh grow up, you can sit on my bed with me,” she laughed, patting the spot next to her.

“I didn’t wanna assume,” he said rolling his eyes as he sat down, the popcorn bowl between them. Gerard finally had a chance to really look around her room, and the first thing he noticed next to the modest tv was a bookshelf filled with movies. "Woah, I never noticed your movie collection before, how'd you get so many?"

"My cousin worked for Blockbuster up until a couple years ago. She got all those at a discount and when she moved to Chicago she decided she didn't want them anymore and gave them to me."

"That's cool," Gerard replied, continuing to look around. Against the amethyst walls white Christmas lights were hung, bathing the room in a warm glow. Taped to her wall above her bed were dozens of photos, that appeared to be mainly of friends, parties, concerts, and pink roses. "You have a lot of friends."

"I don't talk to most of them any more," she said, glancing up. "They all moved on with their lives and I stayed here."

"There's nothing wrong with that," Gerard replied. He had been one of those people, he had moved on with his life, until it got out of control and now he was here as well.

(YN) shrugged. “Sometimes I wonder if maybe I should try to move on too,” she said with a nod to the photos. “Stop living in the past or whatever. Anyway, what’s it like working at the comic book store?”

Gerard shrugged. “It’s pretty good. On slow days I can just read comics for my whole shift, and the people that come in are pretty cool to talk to.”

“Do you miss music?”

Gerard looked thoughtful for a moment. “Some days. But as long as I’m doing something I enjoy, I’m happy.”

(YN) glanced over at him and smiled. “That’s good.”

Later that night (YN) had gotten up to go to the bathroom when she noticed a sliver of light coming from Gerard's doorway. When she peeked in, she saw him at his desk, working intently.

“What are you working on?” Gerard heard (YN) ask from the doorway.

“Oh umm, just this comic idea I’ve been working on,” he replied. When he looked back at her, he spotted his clock, reading that it was nearly 4 AM. “It’s so late, did I wake you up?”

“No, I just got up to go to the bathroom and I saw your light on,” she said padding quietly into the room. “Can I see?”

“Sure,” he said, turning the paper toward her.

“That’s really really good. What’s it about?”

“They’re like an adopted family of superheroes. They all have different powers and their father is trying to train them to save the world,” he said looking up at her. To his surprise, she seemed to be genuinely interested.

“You’re really talented."

"It's not that great," he shrugged.

“Pfft, are you kidding? That girl is so pretty, and there aren’t even words yet and I can tell this guy is super mad at this other aloof guy.”

Gerard looked back up at her in awe. “I’ve been struggling all night because I didn’t think it conveyed that clearly enough.”

“Nah, it’s great, you’re doing great,” she replied. “Are you just doing it for fun, or are you gonna try to get it printed?”

“I’d love to get a comic printed, but I don’t know if I ever will.”

“Like I said, you’re really talented, I bet you could make it happen. I’ll even buy a copy and tell people that you were my roommate when you were working on it.”

Gerard laughed lightly. “I’ll dedicate it to you.”

“I can’t wait. G’night Gerard,” (YN) said before retreating back to her room.

It was a bitterly cold winter day when (YN) returned home from work to find another car in front of the house. When she came in, she heard another voice she thought she recognized.

“Hey (YN),” Gerard called as she walked into her room.

“Yea?” She called back, dropping her things.

“Mikey’s here.”

“Oh! Hey Mikey, how’s everything going?” (YN) asked, as she walked into Gerard’s room and found his brother sitting on the bed.

“Good,” he nodded.

She nodded as well. “I'll get out of your hair, sorry to interrupt,” (YN) waved as she ducked back into her room. Gerard had been talking about how well Mikey had been doing since finishing his program, but as far as she was aware, this was the first they had seen each other since he had completed it.

A while later she was in the kitchen getting dinner when Gerard walked Mikey to the door, exchanging a hug before he left. After the door was closed, Gerard let out a sigh.

“Mikey looked like he’s doing good,” (YN) said as Gerard trudged into the kitchen.

“Yea,” he replied, but the tone of his voice wasn’t happy. “But he doesn’t think he can stay clean here so he’s moving.”

“Really? Where?”

“California. We got some family out there that will keep him straightened out, and keep him away from the people who got him messed up in the first place, like me.”

"Did he say you specifically?"

"No, but-"

“Gerard,” (YN) interrupted sternly. “Just because you started the band doesn’t mean you’re to blame for what he chose to do.”

“I shoulda been looking out for him more. I was such a drunk shtihead I didn’t even know what was happening,” he said running his hands through his hair.

(YN) stepped forward grabbing his arms and pulling them down. “Gerard! I have spent months now listening to you talk about Mikey. You guys both learned some lessons the hard way, but he wouldn’t have kept calling you while he was in rehab and come to visit today if he blamed you. He could have cut you off, moved to California without a word, but he didn’t. That means something, right?”

Gerard looked like he was on the verge of tears but he nodded.

“You guys are both gonna be alright,” she said, letting go of his arms, and wrapping him in a hug.“Sorry, “ just felt like,” she said trailing off with a shake of her head when she pulled back.

“It’s fine, I needed that,” he smiled. “All of it, thank you.”

It didn’t seem like enough time had passed when in the late spring (YN) checked the mail and found a letter from their landlord with the paperwork to renew their lease. She sighed nervously as she made her way to Gerard’s room. Now it wasn't just that she didn’t want to have to find a new place to live, it was the fact that she liked living with Gerard. She liked hanging out with him and she had come to care for him as a real friend. She also recently realized that she had at some point developed more feelings for him, but she pushed those aside.

“Hey Gee?” She said knocking on his door.

“Yea?” She heard him call from the other side before she opened the door.

“We got the lease renewal paperwork today. Did you wanna extend the lease for a full year?”

“Yea, sure. I like it here,” Gerard replied with a smile.

(YN) let out a sigh of relief. “Good, I’m really glad to hear that. I’ll leave this with you, just bring it back when you get it signed at all the flagged spots.”

“Ok,” Gerard nodded as he flipped through the packet.

A while later (YN) looked up from the magazine she was reading when Gerard knocked on her door. “I got the lease thing signed,” he said, walking in and handing her the paperwork.

“Cool, I’ll drop this off tomorrow,” she nodded. “I’m really glad this has worked out.”

“Me too,” Gerard said. “Umm, I never mentioned it before, but I had been living in my car for a couple weeks when you offered me this place.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize it was that bad,” (YN) murmured.

“I was in a really low place, like I was almost at my breaking point ya know, but umm, when I say this turned everything around for me, I mean it. I was able to pick up more shifts at work and I could afford to go back to my therapist and get on my meds again. So thanks for saving my life,” he said with a nod before turning to leave.

“Gee wait,” she said getting up.

“Yea?”

“I… I don’t know what to say except I’m really glad that you’re here and you matter a lot to me, and,” she shrugged as her words failed her. She just wanted Gerard to know how important he was, not just as someone to share rent with, but as well as all the complicated feelings she kept bottled up inside.

Gerard stepped back across the room and wrapped his arms around her. They stood silently hugging for a while before he pulled back. “Hang on.” (YN) nodded as he hurried over to his room and then came back with a bottle of liquor. “Here, you can have it, or get rid of it, it doesn’t matter to me. I bought it months ago because… it doesn’t matter, but that night you invited me to hang out and that meant a lot. I started working on my comic again that night too.”

“I remember that,” she smiled, as she took the bottle from him. “You’re gonna do big things Gee. I’m glad I can cheer you on.”

“Are you sure you don’t wanna come along?” (YN) asked from the doorway of his room. She was heading out to a party with her friend, but to Gerard, she already seemed a little unsteady on her feet.

“No thanks, I gotta work in the morning,” he replied. Just then, a car horn went off outside the house.

“That’s Eli. I’ll try to be quiet coming in,” (YN) waved before hurrying out to her waiting friend.

Gerard got so wrapped up in the page of his comic he was working on he completely lost track of time until his phone went off. "Hello?" Gerard answered his phone.

"Heeey, is this Gerard? (YN)'s roommate?" He heard a female voice slur from the other end.

"Yea, why?" He asked, panic striking through him. He glanced at his clock, it wasn't that late, why was someone calling him about (YN).

"Can you come get (YN)? She's like super drunk and I'm gonna go back to this guy's place but I don't wanna leave her here alone."

"Wait, is this Eli?"

"Yea, can you hurry up before she barfs or something, I can't deal with that."

"Yea, yea, text me the address, I'm on my way," Gerard replied, already slipping on his sneakers.

A while later Gerard was pulling up in front of the house where the party was happening. As he got out of his car, he saw (YN) sitting on the front lawn with a girl he'd never met before, he presumed it was Eli.

"Hey (YN), are you ok?" He asked as he approached. He could tell (YN) had been crying, despite how dark it was.

"Yea," she sniffled and got up unsteadily.

"I'll call you tomorrow, ok sweetie?" Eli said, already heading toward a guy who had been waiting in the distance.

(YN) waved her off as Gerard helped her to the car. Other than the radio playing an old Radiohead song, there was nothing but silence in the car.

"I've never seen you this drunk," Gerard suddenly blurted out. "Are you ok?"

(YN) sniffled again. "I haven't really eaten in a few days and then Eli wanted to do shots when we got to the party and now I'm stupid and wasted," she whined.

Gerard pulled up to a red light and looked over at (YN). She had her head against the window and was staring blankly ahead. "Why haven't you been eating much? Do you need money for groceries? I can kick in more."

"Because I wanna be skinnier so you'll think I'm pretty like the girl you drew in your comic" she said so softly it was almost a whisper.

Gerard's heart broke at her words. "(YN), I do think you're beautiful. You don't have to change for me at all," he said looking back at her just before the light turned green. (YN) turned her head to look out the window so he couldn't see her reaction.

A few blocks later pulled up in front of a convenience store. "What's your favorite gatorade?" Gerard asked.

"Red," (YN) mumbled.

"Ok, wait here a sec," he said as he got out.

Gerard hurried inside, grabbing a big bottle of the drink, as well as a couple burritos.

"Here you go," Gerard said as he handed her the bag. "At least try to eat one to settle your stomach."

"Thanks," she replied, staring into the bag. She was too embarrassed to look up at Gerard at that moment. She felt like an idiot for getting so drunk that he had to take care of her. If she ever had a shot with Gerard, she was sure she had blown it now.

The rest of the drive was just as silent as it had started until they arrived back in the house. Gerard put his arm around (YN) and helped her inside. She was already feeling less dizzy as she sat down on the edge of her bed and pulled off her shoes. Gerard took the bottle of gatorade and set it on her bedside table, plugged her phone into the charger, and brought in the garbage can in case she had to be sick.

"You'll probably feel terrible tomorrow," he said with a slightly sad smile as she pulled the blankets over herself, not even bothering to change out of her clothes.

"I deserve it," she mumbled as she turned her face into her soft, cool pillow.

Before she could fully register what was happening, she felt Gerard kiss her head. "No you don't," he said before turning out the light and shutting the door behind him.

(YN)'s thoughts were spinning like the world had been earlier until she eventually passed out.

The next day (YN)’s phone was vibrating on her bedside table, but the sound felt like a jackhammer vibrating through her skull. Groaning, she opened her eyes to find the offending device.

Hey girl! Call me when u get up so i know ur alive the text from Eli read.

(YN) looked at her clock, it was almost 1 in the afternoon. She dragged herself out of bed, discarding the clothes she had worn the night before, and into the shower, the cold water jolting her awake. Climbing back into bed, she picked up her phone to call her friend.

“You survived,” Eli cheered when she answered the call.

“Oh my god, please shut up,” (YN) winced.

“Oh, you’re really feeling it huh?”

“Yea, I think I got run over at some point last night.”

“No, I didn’t let you run across any roads this time. Maybe Gerard did after he picked you up. How'd that go?”

“I don’t remember,” (YN) groaned. “I remember he bought me food and gatorade,” she said, picking up the bottle of the now room temperature drink.

Eli hummed. “Well he seems like a good guy, he came right to get you no questions asked when I called.”

“Yea,” (YN) agreed, pulling her knees up to her chest. “I just feel so dumb for getting so wasted.”

“It happens. And at least he’s seen you at your worst now. Has he said anything?”

“He’s at work I think.”

“Ah, well at least you got some more time to recover before you have to face him.”

“Why do you have to say it that way?” (YN) groaned as Eli laughed.

The friends talked for a while longer until (YN) heard the front door open.

“Shit, he’s back,” (YN) whispered, her embarrassment flooding back.

“Ok talk to you later, and don’t worry about it!” Eli said brightly before hanging up.

(YN) glanced up and saw Gerard hovering awkwardly by her door. “Hey, how you feeling?”

“Been better,” (YN) replied, tucking a piece of her half wet hair behind her ear awkwardly. “Umm, I don’t really remember a lot from last night, but thanks for coming to get me and everything.”

Gerard nodded. “It’s no problem.”

“I feel really stupid. I won’t be doing that again anytime soon, I promise,” (YN) laughed dryly.

Gerard laughed a little as well. He didn’t know if he should bring up anything that was said between them the night before since she had said she couldn’t remember much, but he couldn’t help but wonder what she did remember.

After a few days, (YN)’s embarrassment at her drunken night finally started to diminish and she and Gerard’s interactions went back to normal. A while later, (YN) was hanging out in Gerard’s room talking about a show they had been to the weekend before when her phone rang.

"Hello? Oh hi," (YN) answered. "What?! Is he ok?" She jumped up and left the room, but Gerard could still hear her end of the conversation, causing him to grow more concerned. "No I didn't see anything, there wasn't anyone… Ok... Yea… Ok let me know."

The color was drained from her face when she walked back into the room.

"What's wrong?" Gerard asked, his brows knitted together.

"Right after my shift ended the store got robbed. My coworker John is in the hospital and they took all the cash. The store is gonna be closed for a couple days I guess."

"Fuck," Gerard replied, totally stunned.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed," she said blankly before turning back toward her room and Gerard heard the door close behind her.

A while later Gerard got up to go to the kitchen to get another cup of coffee, but when he stepped into the hall, he stopped in his tracks. It sounded like crying coming from (YN)’s room.

"(YN), are you ok?" He asked as he knocked on her door, but she didn't answer. Cautiously he opened the door and found (YN) was sitting on her bed, knees pulled up to her chest, sobbing.

"Shit," Gerard whispered as he rushed over and pulled her against him, letting her cry on his shoulder.

"It coulda been me. I could be in the hospital or dead right now and no one would even notice or care! Just another loser with no direction in life dead. I've wasted everything, I've ruined my whole life!"

"You haven't," Gerard said, rubbing her back. "I'd care very much if anything happened to you. And you have plenty of time. I had a job at a tv network and gave it up to form the band, and now I'm trying to get into comics."

"But I'm not talented like you! I have no skills, I never went to college because I didn't know what I wanted to do and I still don't. I just don't want to be stuck here the rest of my life waiting to get held up at gunpoint," she sobbed. "I'm just too stupid to get out of my own way long enough to figure anything out."

“No you aren't stupid, sometimes it just takes more time to get it figured out."

Eventually (YN)’s sobs started to quiet and she pulled back. “Thanks Gee. You really didn’t need to do this.”

“Yea I did. I couldn’t just let you be alone when you feel like this.”

(YN) sighed. “Every time I close my eyes I just picture it happening to me. I’m so tired, but I don’t think I’m gonna be able to sleep tonight.”

“Hang on,” Gerard said, getting up. (YN) saw the light from his room shut off, and he came back. “Ok, come here, I’ll keep you safe,” he said as he settled in next to her.

(YN) felt like her heart was going to burst through her chest as she slid down next to him. She laid her head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.

Something shifted in Gerard and (YN)’s relationship that night, although nothing was spoken of it. They started trading off whose bed they slept in, crawling into bed together just to be close to the other. When they watched a movie together, she rested her head against his shoulder. When (YN) was in the kitchen making coffee, Gerard would come in and wrap his arms around her and hold her close while she worked. The day after (YN) had a really bad shift at work, she came home and found a pink rose that looked like it had been trimmed from someone’s garden sitting on her bed.

It was a warm early fall evening when Gerard and (YN) showed up at a party held by a friend of a friend. (YN) had gone off to talk to Eli, and Gerard found himself watching her from across the yard. He wished he was by her side, his arm wrapped around her waist, holding her close, that’s where he felt happiest.

"Why are you looking at your roommate like that?" Frank asked, appearing at Gerard's side.

“Jesus,” Gerard muttered under his breath, startled. “What are you talking about?”

“Like you wanna get out here and get on top-”

“Stop, no, it’s not like that,” Gerard shook his head.

“Oh, so you don’t care if I go ask her out then?”

“What? You can’t!” Gerard blurted out. “I mean, what about Jamia?”

Frank grinned and pointed a finger in Gerard's face. “Exactly! So what are you gonna do about it?”

“Everything is fine, we’re fine,” Gerard grumbled.

As the sun began to set more people showed up, filling up the backyard. Without warning there was a shout as two guys started pushing each other, and then punches began to fly.

(YN) found herself too near the fight and tried to get away from the fray, but more people were rushing to watch or take part in it and she couldn’t get past. Suddenly she felt someone grab her hand, interlacing their fingers with hers. She was about to pull away when she looked up and realized it was Gerard.

“Come on,” he said, pulling her out of the crowd.

“Thanks for not leaving me behind,” (YN) said once they were a safe distance from the fracus.

“I couldn’t ever leave you behind,” Gerard smiled back at her.

At that moment she became conscious of how their hands were still intertwined and how closely they were standing. (YN) didn’t want to move and lose the moment, but police sirens started cutting through the shouts of the brawl. “Oh shit," (YN) started laughing. “Let’s get out of here!”

“Here we go again,” Gerard smirked as they took off running, hand in hand, through the backyards until they couldn’t hear any of the commotion any longer. When they finally came out on a side street, they were both out of breath, but laughing. The smell of rain hung in the air.

“I have no idea where we are now,” (YN) laughed.

“Me neither, but,” Gerard trailed off with a shrug as they started walking aimlessly down the street.

(YN) glanced down, not totally understanding why Gerard was still holding her hand, but she still wasn’t planning on letting go. Then she noticed Gerard glancing down as well.

“(YN),” he started.

“Sorry,” she said, starting to pull her hand away, but Gerard held tighter.

“No, it’s not that,” he said, stopping under the street light. A soft rain began to fall around them. "It's that I don't wanna change things between us, but I really want to," he hesitated then took a step closer to (YN). He raised his free hand and gently caressed her cheek before leaning in and pressing his lips against hers.

(YN)'s mind was spinning. She couldn't believe that this was really happening, that Gerard, her roommate, her friend, was now kissing her in the middle of a desolate street. She kissed him back, not knowing if this would happen again, and she wanted to make the most of this chance.

Gerard's hand moved from her cheek to run through her hair, now soaked from the steady rain. He dropped her hand that he was still holding, but only so he could wrap his arm around her and pull her closer against him as he deepened the kiss and she draped her arms over his shoulders.

When they finally pulled apart, the rain had them both soaked and they were laughing together again. “We should try to find our way home,” Gerard said glancing around.

“Let’s go this way,” (YN) suggested with a nod down the street.

Gerard nodded with a smile and wrapped his arm around her shoulder as they headed back to find the car.

The next morning (YN) woke up in her bed with Gerard holding her tight. She had hoped to spend all morning being lazy with him, but what had woken her up was her phone ringing on her bedside table.

“Hello?” She whispered.

“Hey (YN), I know you don’t work until this afternoon, but we got a call out, can you come in this morning and work a double?” (YN)’s manager asked.

(YN) let her face fall against her pillow and groaned softly. “Yea I guess so.”

“Great, see you as soon as you can get here.”

When (YN) glanced over at Gerard, he was just waking up. “What’s wrong?”

“I wanted to spend the morning with you here, but I got called in for a double shift,” (YN) pouted.

“Damn,” Gerard frowned. “But I’ll be here when you get back.”

“I know,” she sighed before leaning in and kissing him softly. She climbed out of bed and got ready for work. The day seemed to drag by because all she wanted was to go home to Gerard.

“I’m so glad that day is done!” (YN) announced when she burst through the door. She waited for Gerard to reply but didn’t hear anything. “Gee? Are you here?”

“Yea,” he replied forlornly, coming out of his room.

“What’s wrong?” She asked.

“I’m gonna go out to visit Mikey,” Gerard said.

“Oh cool!” (YN) smiled up at him and he felt like his heart was breaking.

“And when I’m out on the west coast, I’ve got a meeting with Dark Horse Comics about my project.”

“That’s awesome!” (YN) grinned. But when she didn’t see the same level of excitement in Gerard’s face, her own excitement faltered. “Isn’t it?”

“Yea, I guess. I’m just nervous about it. There are a few things they wanna discuss about developing it and stuff. But I might have to move out to the west coast if this all works out.”

“Oh,” (YN) said, surprised. She tried to keep her disappointment hidden. “That’s an incredible opportunity though.”

“I know, but we’ve only just-”

“Gerard, don't you think for even one second about not going because of me,” (YN) interrupted him. “I have wasted my entire life being so afraid that I’ll make the wrong choice, that I let every decent opportunity pass me by. I care about you too much to let you do the same.”

Gerard didn’t know how to respond, other than to take a step forward and wrap (YN) into a tight hug. "Thanks," he mumbled against her neck.

They stood like that for a while, neither willing to let go. “Come on, let’s order something for dinner to celebrate,” she suggested once they pulled back.

The following week, Mikey picked Gerard up from the airport. They put together a list of places Mikey loved to check out the next day.

After stopping at the coffee shop down the street, the comic book store that always had what Mikey was looking for, and the record shop with the friendly owner they went to the beach to kill time before dinner.

"You ok? Are you nervous about the meetings or something?" Mikey asked. He had noticed Gerard seemed distracted all day, but Gerard just shook his head. "Then what's wrong?" Mikey asked.

"I couldn't sleep last night," Gerard said with a glance at his brother.

"Is the bed uncomfortable?"

“No, it's not that," he paused. "It's that I can’t sleep without her,” Gerard said, looking down at his hands.

"(YN)?"

"Yea."

“How long have you been together?” Mikey asked.

“We haven’t officially, but it’s, I mean...” Gerard stammered, searching for the words to define something that had only just begun and had no definition.

“But you love her?” Mikey filled in the gaps, knowing Gerard better than Gerard knew himself.

Gerard listened to the waves crashing on the shore. He didn't even realize when he had fallen in love with (YN), because it wasn't like a lightning bolt from the sky. It grew out of lazy days talking for hours, nights sleeping in the other's bed just because they wanted to be that close to each other, the way her hair fell in her face, her laugh, her lips, her selflessness, the way she was always pushing him to do more and be better. And now there he was, missing her like crazy, ready to throw away his dream if she asked him to. But she hadn't, and she wouldn’t. She encouraged him to go across the country and chase it down, even if it meant leaving her behind.

“Yea,” he said with a soft smile and Mikey nodded.

Silence hung between the brothers for a while as the sun began to set. “It’s almost time to meet up with Kristin for dinner,” Mikey announced as he got up.

Gerard nodded and followed him back to the car. As they drove away from the beach, Gerard thought about how much he wanted to bring (YN) here. He knew she’d love it. It felt like there were so many possibilities, fresh starts for everyone. He just needed to get them out of New Jersey.

(YN) paced outside the arrivals gate, checking the screen with the times over and over. Gerard’s flight was on time, he should be arriving shortly. She had spent most of the day excited that he was coming back today, but now that she was at the airport waiting for him, she felt incredibly nervous.

Gerard hadn’t called since he let her know he had arrived safely. She had insisted that he spend his time with Mikey and getting ready for the meetings and not to worry about her, but that didn’t stop her from thinking about him all the time. The first night she tried to sleep in her own bed, but ended up crawling into his because his pillows smelled like him and it made her heart ache a little less. And it’s where she had spent the rest of the week.

That morning as she sat in his bed, knees pulled up to her chest as she sipped her coffee in the cool morning air, she looked around his space. They’d been living together almost a year now, and the room had become so uniquely his. The comics that were stacked up next to his bed, the drawings that littered his desk, the records in the crate he painted himself. All things that went into what added up to Gerard. She smiled softly as a realization dawned on her as she shivered.

“I love him,” (YN) admitted to herself softly. “I really, truly, love him.”

Now at the airport she glanced up at the screen and saw his flight had arrived. Her heart started hammering in her chest as she started to look around, not knowing how soon he’d appear. What felt like an eternity later, she finally spotted a mop of black hair.

“Gee!” She called as she rushed over to him. Gerard dropped his bag so he could wrap his arms around her in a big hug. He pulled her in for a kiss in the middle of the crowd of travelers.

“I missed you,” he murmured when they pulled back.

“Me too,” she smiled.

"Let's get out of here," he smiled as he took her hand and they went to find her car.

"So how was the trip? How was Mikey? And the meetings, tell me everything!" (YN) gushed as they finally arrived at her car.

"Mikey's doing really good. He has this girlfriend, Kristin, she's super sweet, you'll really like her," he said as he threw his bag in the trunk.

"Oh yea, maybe I’ll meet her one day," (YN) smiled.

“(YN), I wanted to wait until we were someplace nicer than the airport parking ramp, but I can't wait any longer. I got the job at Dark Horse so I’m gonna have to move out west,” he paused, reaching out and taking her hands. “But I can’t leave without you because I love you so much (YN). It’d be a new start for both of us, together. Please?”

It took (YN) a moment to fully process what Gerard said. "Yes!" She finally replied in awe.

Gerard grabbed her face between his hands and pulled her lips to his as tears spilled from behind her closed eyes. He held her close as he kissed her with everything he had. When they pulled back, he rested his forehead against hers.

“I love you too Gerard,” she murmured. “And thank you for not leaving me behind.”

“I couldn’t ever leave you behind.”

#gerard way x reader #gerard way fan fic #gerard way fan fiction #gerard way imagine #my chemical romance fan fic #my chemical romance fan fiction

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anonil88 · 4 years

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“This isn't prison break.”parts 1 & 2

Rue runs away for a night from rehab with a bunch of people she doesn't know. They go to a club, do some stupid stuff and adopt a cat.

wrote this and put it on AO3- lnk here- but also updating on here:

PART 1

Rue laughs absently at the other group of "degenerates" as Ali would call them. They are walking along the side of the road towards wherever a kid named Malcolm was leading them. She technically was supposed to be in her small dorm bed asleep and awaiting 4 am check in. But instead here she was being a fellow degenerate who had technically escaped the rehab facility. They all intended on going back to the treatment facility eventually. She hopes Sol would even though it meant they probably would be separated. They all just needed a night of more because everyone was on edge and needed a break. Everyone was aware that the consequences would be getting kicked out or all restrictions taken away. But, fuck it.

Her group of acquaintances, because they were not her friends, was made up of a random assortment of folks. One of which was some guy named Graham who was apparently the older "brother" of Angel. Angel was the only one out of the group besides her roommate who actually knew more than whatever she half assed in group therapy. Which was very little but it was enough to keep them.... interested. Rue shoves her hands in the pockets of a pair of baggy shorts that Angel threw at her in a parking lot after everyone met back up. Their escape plan was a plan but they all booked it through a hole in the fence and through a patch of woods at first. Some person named Bones, who had to at least be a sophomore in college, picked them all up in a hatchback and the Graham who opened a backpack filled with vices.

Rue steered clear of the opiates and went straight for the bottle of Coconut Rum. Even though she could practically hear the pills singing her fucking name. Most of them actually opted to be clean of whatever landed them in rehab but not sober. Not everyone though because Angel was definitely rolling a tiny bit and so were two other people out of the 5 fence jumpers. Including her roommate Sol. Rue just figured the slap on the wrist once they got back would be less harsh without a positive test. The rum was more than enough to stay kind of alert amongst everyone here. All these faces that might leave her dying face down in a ditch if she OD’ed....again.

She wasn't even in here because of an overdose. Just a basic relapse that made her mom's mind up for her and now she was forced into a stupid facility with strangers. They forced her to talk, made sure she ate, but she honestly felt worse being inside than out. It was probably working the 12 steps and quiet therapy sessions but in places she didn't see yet. This right here though the warmth of the air touching her skin as the packed car they'd all tumbled into hurtled through empty streets. Leaning her head back she mumbles along the lyrics while Sol pulls at the worn shirt collar.

"Beep beep go swerving in my, Beep been you want me riding in your...."

Rue sighs feeling sticky lips press against her clavicle and up her neck.

"Beep beep ghost busting in my,

Beep beep you want me riding in your....driving super fast."

Sol was cool people but Rue knew it couldn't be anything more than fooling around. Kissing when no one was watching or either of them came back from a therapy session sobbing. Sometimes Sol sneaking into her bed at night so they could have quickie sex sessions. This wasn't how Rue expected to explore her sexuality that was pretty dormant but it was what she had. It also wasn't with who she had in mind either. Lingering feelings aside the two of them were stuck in a juvenile inpatient program. With the same beds as the ones in college pamphlets, a no shoelace rule, and fuzzy socks ( that Rue secretly loves). This girl was like 3 inches shorter than Rue, dark skinned, neck tattoos and a short cut. Sol had been through so much more shit than Rue and it made her feel ungrateful. Ungrateful because at least she had a hard working mom who still loved her and hadn't abandoned all hope. Other people in the program who took it seriously though told her not to because her life sucked too.

Feeling Sol's lips on hers she kissed her back. She didn't feel anything but it must have felt amazing to Sol who deepened the kiss. The car swerved past what in Rue's mind had to be a pothole. Sol falls away further into her body clutching the fabric of her shirt and accidentally her chest. Rue hears Sol sigh and snaps her eyes open while Sol still kisses her. Rue grabs hold of the handle above the door and sits back up mumbling, what was that. She watches Sol roll her eyes and sit back into the tan seats.

"Oh FUCK," Bones yelled slowing the car down and pulling over. Bones had their black hair slicked all the way back and a cigarette falling out of their mouth. They were odd enough sober and everyone's dd, just a ball of chaotic a.d.d they'd laughed at her earlier as they walked her from the gas station bathroom back to the car. It was a nice gesture because apparently she seemed "kind of uncomfortable," which was true. The urge to escape herself dulled the fear of her mother's true unbridled anger. Or Fez's.

He was really upset when he found out she got a new plug after actually being clean for so long. She turns to look out the back window and sees two green eyes attached to a small grey mound in the road.

"What the....omg a cat omg," Angel is practically bouncing out of the car after pulling out a half eaten filet o fish. Rue watches him in an outfit she felt fit him so much more than the basic t-shirt and sweatpants he wore everyday. His platform sneakers lit up across the black asphalt as he inches closer to the obviously terrified animal. A glitter covered arm wove in front of him with food and Rue leans into the window in anticipation. The only thing that could make Angel seem even more angelic was wings or a halo above his half platinum half silver hair. He honestly seemed like the type to fit right into Jules's friend group. But instead he was the kind creative rave kid who drew her pictures of kandy he'd give her one day.

"Hey um...you ," she feels her shoulder being tapped. "Put this in your lap."

PART 2

"Yes! I love this song," Bones yells back rolling down the windows. The cool autumn air filling the car and the smell of weed being blown out the window.

Her heel is bouncing with a mix of anxiety and anticipation. With one more she could become triple A instead of alcoholics anonymous. She can feel a comfortable softness against her sole. It's from a piece of fabric she keeps stuffed in her sock. Her knee keeps bouncing in place with the sleeping kitten being stroked by Sol in her lap. Her current reality is so much more serene than the one she relives in her head.

Arrival nurses took her hoodie at this new place only letting it stay with her the first night. She was so fucking high on check in that she screamed please don't take my dad please as they explained it to her mom. Her mom who she clung to like they were about to skin her alive. Chest rising and falling quick enough someone said something about a shot. Too high to be cold and distant but not enough for her heart to stop. Just enough to be a paranoid fuck up. Leslie tried to calm her down but it only worked after her mom bargained with them, one night.

One night and then her mom visited the next day to say goodbye. Slipping a gray square in her pocket. It was worn in from a t-shirt that her dad wore in her baby pictures. Leslie hugged her so tight before leaving whispering we love you so much. That was the last time she'd seen her mom and every time she called Leslie said oh rue like her heart was breaking again. So those phone calls were short because her mom crying always fucks her up mentally for a few days. The silent pauses remind her of the little sister who always has faith in her but is turning into someone who doesn't even look at her.

"You okay," Sol whispers and rue nods because when was she ever. Her arm that sol is resting on is cramping but she lets it, not much arm space in this back row anyway. She should have just chosen the trunk with some 16 year old named Zach.

"On the left yesss we made it and on time too," Graham jeers next to Sol.

Rue looks at the dash clock crinoline her brow. "How is almost 1 am on time," she whispers.

Sol chuckles, "It is a club not a house party you knew that right ?" Rue bites the inside of her lip and shakes her head no. Sol puckers a bottom lip and kisses her cheek. Great pity Rue thinks. Sol leans in to whisper to Rue, "Don't worry Graham knows the bouncer. No fakes required."

Rue opens back up the glass bottle in the seat net and lets the clear liquid burn her throat a bit. Out of her realm was an understatement, house parties were something she was used to but never clubs. She didn't even know what kind of club this was but judging from the giant rainbow flag out front, angry repressed frat bros wouldn't be an issue. Which helped the nerves in her stomach unwind. The fur ball on her lap made a noise and she rubbed it through the sweater it's been laid on. Sol said the kitten was probably dumped because there was a tag scar and the kitten was super clean. But was she risking it....no.

Sol takes the bottle from her hand and screws the cap back on. "You gonna dance with me tonight Benny." Sol says as she nudges her shoulder.

"Maybe," Rue shrugs.

" Okay well how about anyone else," Sol grins coyly.

Rue looks away from her and out the window. She's more interested in the brick building as they get closer than someone's hot sweaty body. There's a line to the door with several guards standing with gloved hands and flashlights. " Idk maybe," Rue looks back at Sol who is rolling her eyes.

" Yes she is," Angel yells from the passenger seat. He's checking his makeup in the mirror and winks at rue. Which makes her tuck her hair behind her ear and cough to cover the blush. Angel turns around happily and says, "meee.'

Leaning forward Sol pecks Angel and says, " Bennett your goal tonight is to have fun, dance with someone. He, she, they, who cares, maybe you'll get a lil prison pen pal."

Rue rolls her eyes, that probably wasn't happening but it was about trying new experiences. Treatment was also not prison; it just was not freedom either. Bones pulls past the entrance and swings into the parking lot. Graham is behind them pointing as they follow directions. He's even saying fun facts like this is Knott's which Angel keeps mimicking. Bones slowly moves the car until one guard leans his hand in the window. The guard daps Graham up and they laugh for a second. His name is apparently DJ and he's their in. The only rules are no weapons.

In the parking lot they all get put and Rue notices other cars with clusters of people around them. She shakes her lap free of cigarette ash and cat hair. The cat now named sparkle is being in the trunk with a makeshift bed, a small can of tuna Bones just had and an old bottle lid filled with water. Rue leans down and ties the mismatched dollar store laces on her chucks. They had hot dogs on them which was kind of cute. A tire squeals close by of a car obviously moving way too fast and drunk singing out a window speeds past them. Idiots. Everyone else was finishing a shared bottle or blunt. Leaning against the side of the trunk she feels Sol rest against her arm warming it up.

Rue can hear a steady thump and beat coming from the brick building. It makes her head move which means the music might not be her thing but it'll be tolerable. Graham even said there's another section with actual seats that has a more contained dance floor with pop and hip-hop. Just in case she got overwhelmed by the rave scene and the lights. She doubles over as she laughs at Angel's jokes.

Kid was fucking hilarious, she stands up wiping her eyes and freezes looking in front of her.

#rue bennett #rue euphoria #jules vaughn #jules euphoria #original character #euphoria hbo #euphoria #euphoria fanfiction #euphoria fanfic #my wriitng #fanfiction #club tw #rue #jules #rue x jules

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alextriestowritestuff · 5 years

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Elite S3 reactions (Episode by episode/overall thoughts +SPOILERSSSS)

So I know I post writing stuff but I have *EMOTIONS* about this show and no one to share them with so please ignore this post, if you don’t watch the show/don’t care. Includes spoilers so you’ve been warned.

Ok, I’m going to go episode by episode then do my overall feelings. I’d love to know anyone’s thoughts about the show so feel free to reblog! I just watched the show in 10 hours straight but alot goes on so I might not be able to remember every single conversation in a episode. Multiple characters have a lot going on at once. For reference, I don’t speak Spanish-I watch the show with English subtitles.

-3x1: Carla

-Pretty solid start, we pick up a couple weeks after we left off. I felt so DUCKING bad for Carla the entire season and I understood why she lied in court about accusing Polo. Malick is introduced-am I the only who doesn’t like people who are persistent in asking other people out? Like my no is a no. Don’t annoy me, this is the kind shit people pull and pressure others into a relationship. It’s not endearing to me. So I automatically didn’t like him.

-Lu gets kicked out but can someone tell me where she lives throughout the season? I figured she lived with her mom after her dad kicked her out but at the last episode, in the airport, she says both her parents have disowned her? Where has been living? Maybe she saved up money unlike Valerio idk.

-3x2: Samuel and Guzman

-Samu is trying to get Carla back. I didn’t dislike them as a couple last season but I knew they were using each other, so I didn’t allow myself to get too close to them. But now I ship them. I wanted them together this season. Yeray is introduced-um, I still think he’s irrelevant. I did think for a moment that he was going to hold his money over Carla’s head so she’d stay with him but he didn’t even think for one second that was why Carla was trying to get with him (because her asshole dad pimped her out ugh) . He was only helpful when it came to the contract at the end.

-Deadass, I was going to exit out if Valerio had slept with Rebe’s mom. I thought that entire scene was pretty much sexual assault and it was creepy. He needs to go to rehab lmao.

-Polo trusting Guzman again was a dumb bitch move. So here’s how I feel about Polo. V unfortunately, I love him. He’s one of my fav characters. I know he’s a killer but Idk I think it’s the actor or something because he’s so pretty (the entire cast is beautiful) that I forgive everything he does?? Also I hated Marina by the end of S1 so he did me a favor. What I wanted from Polo was to embrace the fact that he was the villain. Like the times he threatened Lu by taking away the scholarship or (tried) to threaten Samu. Those scenes I was like hell fucking yes, no more wallowing. But noo this boy wanted forgiveness. Dude. You’re cute but you still killed someone, jesus. I would be so ashamed/guilty to be hanging out with the brother of the person I killed. He played himself there big time. The tweets were interesting way of revenge and ofc Caye used that to her advantage. She’s a leech but I thought she used the fact that she had the murder weapon (as leverage for Polo to stay with her) waaay more.

3x3: Cayetana and Valerio

-Strange couple but eh, better than incest. So in this episode, Samu makes a deal with the worst detective ever (every season, she fails to solve a case lmao) and I don’t blame him. He’d do anything to get Nano back, it’s why he tried to get Polo arrested for an entire season. It’s shitty that he did that to Rebe but I understand why. Before this season, I thought Rebe was irrelevant because she wasn’t really fleshed out but after this season, I grew to like her a lot. It hurt watching her and Samu get close because everytime she said something like ‘you’re the only good thing in my life’ I was like girl, he’s the reason why you’ve lost everything ugh. It was uncomfy and sad to watch.

-Ander and Omar. I liked them-didn’t like what Ander did last season but he did confess and was forgiven. So Omar’s whole cheating thing came out of left field and it wasn’t! Even! Properly! Confessed! to! Ander!!!! Oof. Ander SUFFERED this season. But I’m glad the writers chose cancer over HIV because there’s so much stigma attached to that disease and the LGBT community and I’m tired of that narrative.

3x4: Lu

-I’ve always respected the hell out of Lu. Yes, she’s been a bitch for the past 2 seasons but she was always upfront about her actions. She didn’t like you, she let you know. This was her shining season and I loved her Valentine reversal. She looked hot, she really looked out for Nadia/Ander this episode (and the entire season). She could’ve revealed the cheating but she didn’t. I feel like S1 Lu would’ve so she’s come full circle. She said NO to Guzman which was everything. Oh speaking of which, I actually like Guzman. He’s really developed as a character in terms of temper. I like that he wanted to move on from hating Polo. But when he’s with Nadia, he irritates me.

-I don’t have Muslim parents but I have Muslim cousins. My parents are immigrants. They’re not extreme like Nadia’s but like I feel Guzman goes out of his way to make Nadia’s home life worse. He’s knows her parents are conservative but he’s strides in the store and tells them about how their daughter can’t study. Should Nadia had said something? Yes but how could she? She has responsibilities to her parents. Her 2 other siblings have been kicked out. Nadia claims that her religion is important to her but Guzman repeatedly disrespects it. I couldn’t be with someone like that. It wasn’t cute that he offered to work so Nadia could study-which we saw him do ONCE. It’s overbearing. Also Nadia just forgives him so easily, it’s like dude, do you not care? So I like Guzman-he’s actually a good friend to Ander and formerly, Polo but my god, he’s so disrespectful when it comes to Nadia.

-Also I liked the threesome, not as good as Christian/Polo/Carla but not bad.

3x5: Ander

-Best episode this season, hands down. I loved the opening song and sequence. The scene where Polo’s parents catch him with Valerio and Caye really got my gears thinking-I was like if I were a parent (don’t want kids but ya know, if I did), how would I react to that? I’d like to think that I’d be very accepting of my kid (given they’re not hurting themselves or others) in terms of sexuality, religion, etc. But I was like hmmm, being polyamorous?? Not one I would be prepared for. But if the kid is happy, I guess. That was random but those were my thoughts.

-Rebe finding out it was Samu who sold them out hurt like a bitch. BUT MY GOD THE BLACKLIGHT REVEAL!! Ugh the best. I had to pause, I was so shook. And Malick and Omar reveal to Nadia. Jesus. I loved her reaction but it was immediately undermined by the next episode when she forgives her brother. Like I get it, they’re siblings. But she should’ve held it against him longer. Omar got 0 consequences for cheating this season-not from Ander or Nadia. Tf.

3x6: Rebeca

-Carla is on drugs. Yikes. Again, her dad was pimping her all season so I get it girl. Also anyone else think the adults are stupid in the show?? All of their parents are business people but one bad financial move, they’re on their asses and almost bankrupt? Happened with Guzman’s dad and now Carla’s. Do they not invest in other things? Idk have a savings account?

-Also Samu and Guzman being friends. Top tier content. Chef’s kiss. Full circle and character development to the max. Ngl I felt a little bit of homoerotic tones there?? Just me?? I would ship them over any other couple if they got to together for just one night.

-Nadia sharing the scholarship with Lu. Ugh. Everything. Loved that.

-Ander lying to Omar about having an affair. Ew. I know he was trying to push Omar away but like he was the one cheating? So either call him out on that or just break up with no reason. Don’t make yourself look bad dude. Ugh but the both of them sobbing at the end of their breakup...my heart shattered. That was GREAT acting.

-Polo saving Carla. We all liked that.

3x7: Nadia and Omar

-FUCK Ander’s mom for expelling them. I went to private school-there’s rules in place for parents who have money so they don’t manipulate the administration. Polo’s moms needed to let their son fight his own battles. Also Ander’s mom calling Guzman to come over to talk to Ander was really strange. She just expelled him. I know he’s Ander’s best friend but idk, she just expelled him. And they don’t even talk about it at Ander’s house. Again, this is the Guzman I like-the loyal/good friend. Loved the convo between him and Ander.

-I liked Carla’s honesty to Yeryay and that they could possibly be friends. I always knew he idealized her for standing up for him on social media so I’m glad they acknowledged that.

-Also Lu’s comment to Nadia that she looks like a pistachio was everything. And her ‘People are watching’ line in the previous episode is great too.

-KEVIN FUCKING MCHALE made a cameo. Hell yes. And ofc, great speech by Nadia and Lu. Polito’s last conversations really did a lot for me to symphatize with his character (He didn’t have to do much because I still liked him despite his murdering). He got his moms to face the fact that they can’t throw money at every problem and that he is a killer. This scene and the beginning scenes of the next episode is what made me at peace with his character. I knew he was going to die but like this is what he needed for some sort of redemption.

3x8: Polo

-Not the best ending for such a good season. But the first 15 minutes which are the convos and events that led up to Polo’s death was good. I never suspected Lu for a second, I really thought Valerio (Had some decent motive-more than Nadia, less obvious people like Samu and Guzman) had done it. But when I rewatched the trailer, you see that the writers told us it was her all along. Her line about the ELITE gang being family and that she’d protect them was a clue. She had the least interaction with Polo himself throughout the season so I never had time to even suspect her. Really brilliant.

-Them touching the murder weapon is powerful. This was the only way to end things. I figured by episode 6ish that everyone was working together based on their answers in the flashforwards. And I half laughed because no sane police force would allow the witness/potential suspects to hang out together before interrogation. At least not without police watching them.

-I do think it’s odd that Samu asked Rebe to ask her mom to get rid of Polo because he literally betrayed her and she talks to him (although mad) despite that. OKayyy. I really thought we were going to get the Samu and Carla get-together but guess not. I feel cheated by that because they clearly wanted each other all along.

-The endings weren’t the best. I do appreciate that Omar made the right call in the end and I’m glad Ander is in remission. Oof my gripe though was with Nadia and Omar’s parents. So Lu goes to the airport and admits hey my parents disowned me and they’re like of course, we’ll be your family. AND I WAS LIKE ‘WHAT ABOUT OMAR??’ Y’all were so willing to kick him out and they never really made amends. So like I get that Omar’s dad is trying by acknowledge that Ander is Omar’s boyfriend but I mean during Omar’s mom’s dinner, he had no right asking him about his studies. He didn’t move out. Y’all kicked him out. How do you think he’s doing, trying to find a place to sleep? Jesus. Also the mom isn’t all good. Again, if I were a mom, I don’t understand how I could live without knowing if my kid is okay since they’re not living with me. My mom is a single mom-I know there’s no man in the world, not my dad, no one that she would chose me over. If my husband kicked my kids out, no questions, the husband is going to the curb or I’m going with my kids. Idgaf. The mom should’ve stood up. It just made me so angry that they were like poor Lu, no family but they mistreated their own child.

OKAY so overall thoughts...I thought this was a really good season. I’d say 1st was the best, then this one, and then second (Ngl I don’t remember the 2nd one too much okay). I liked that it was more angsty and more character focused then the whodunnit? part that we’re used to. The entire cast has such strong acting and I’m going to miss whoever isn’t returning for S4. I’m going to miss Polo as well goddamn.

Best moments of the season: Lu saying/doing ANYTHING-I have feelings, bitch. Her friendship with Nadia and other characters. Carla standing up to her pimp dad. Ander being in remission (his acting was great too). All of episode 5. Kevin McHale cameo.

Worst moments: Polo asking Guzman if he would ever be forgiven?? And I know he did end up forgiving him but like bro, just because I don’t want to harbor hate for the rest of my life, doesn’t mean I forgive you for killing my sister whatttt. Omar never confessing to Ander about the cheating. Like no consequences and his character was just demolished this season. Still don’t know where Lu lived this entire season lmao. Anything Ander’s mom did to the students ugh.

Overall, I liked this season. It felt more mature for a high school TV show. I’m not super invested into any particular ship so I don’t feel cheated like most people. It takes me a while to get into ships but once I do, I get really invested. The only ship I was really disappointed in not seeing was Carmuel because Carla went through alot this season and Samu clearly wanted to be with her. And that’s all I had to say lmao.

#Elite #elite season 3 #elite netflix #elite s3 spoilers #not writing #alextriestowritestuff

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echotovalley · 4 years

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so because I’m taking a writing break but still super needy

I figured I would post this outline for a pokemon au that I’m never going to write. it’s basically notes from a conversation I had back in early 2018? Imagine my surprise going back now and realizing this might read much like Detective Pikachu - cubone is just my favorite pokemon

***before we get into anything please know that while I play pgo and I’ve learned LOTS of new pokemon, I’m still the most familiar and attached to the og 150 + 1. I also probably get a lot of canon pokemon rules and history wrong but my heart is in the right place

reblogs appreciated! | come talk at me about your thoughts or literally anything

premise: keith might not be a pokemon person

but pokemon are definitely a keith person

- for unknown reasons keith docks in cuba, he's kind of just been getting work and moving moving always moving because one place never works out for long. pokemon are everywhere but it's not his thing.

it never happened for him besides why would he make an animal be saddled with him? there's no stability there. and again, he's always moving. through so many different regions.

he doesn't have the heart to yank a sandshrew onto a barge across the atlantic or a charmander up the northeast coast of the US. he can barely take care of himself. and it's weird by now. to not have a pokemon by now. they were everywhere and so normalized.

they were part of everyday school curriculum and even in hospitals and rescue stations. which is another reason why he never stayed in one place very long because not having a pokemon didn't incite people to trust you.

bc even team rocket (team rocket still sounds so much better than team galra but team rocket is the galra) had pokemon that bonded and trusted them.

he gets a room and some horrible job on the coast and basically just gets by. tries not to cause trouble or get caught or encourage rattatas or a caterpie to follow him home because they could still smell half the lunch he didn't eat tucked in his bag

- i'm plotting by the seat of my pants but what really kick-started all of this was the thought of Keith finding a wounded cubone in the middle of the night.

it's too dark and raining to tell what animal or pokemon attacked it or if it was a person that fractured the skull he wore enough for a piece to break off along the jaw

the cubone sustained a mean looking scrape to its face and this is not what keith needs right now but he can tell the cubone's crying and kind of just accepted what's happened and it keeps pawing at the missing piece in the skull and keith may not actively interact with pokemon but he doesn't hate them and he still has a heart.

he's docked in cuba and his spanish just gets him by to get food and money and not anger anyone

he didn't think the barge's docking region through all of the way so he's got a cubone to help with rudimentary spanish that sucks on the best day but he's going to try and get the cubone help

he starts rushing through streets and people's yards because he could have swore the town had a gym he passed but in the dark and rain it takes him a full hour to find the gym.

- duh it's closed but he's at least going to bang on the doors and hopefully it's going to set off an alarm or something

the police will show up or someone will be able to take the cubone where it needs to go. his hand is numb from knocking as hard as he could before the door is whooshed open and someone is spitting rapid fire spanish like venom and he thinks he manages to get out that he can really only speak english and shoves the cunbone into their hands.

before he knows it, he's being yanked by his collar into the gym and down hallways and finally into the blinding lights of the pokemon center on sight.

there's more spanish and faces that look so similar that its clear it's a family that runs the gym.

- beep beep guess who's family owns and runs the gym

the pokecenter is actually a rehabilitation center founded and run by the McClain family for several generations

he gets questioned after the cubone is taken back behind the doors and it takes someone repeatedly snapping their fingers in front of his face to get him to come back to the conversation.

his name's keith, he's from the US, he just found the cubone - no he doesn't know if it has an owner, doesn't even know if it’s wild or if it has a nearby pack or how it got hurt or how long it’s been hurt.

but keith,

keith is his name and he can at least answer that.

he stays there over night and finds out that Marco is the one that answered the door. Veronica is the one to actually examine him because he looks like he's about to pass out.

their mother is the one to assure him the cubone would be fine - her daughter Rachel attends to injured pokemon and gets another son Luis to show Keith to a room in their house and keith passes out the second he stumbles to a bed.

- in the morning, when he goes to the bathroom and is in the middle of washing his hands, another son is banging on the door for Marco to get out of the bathroom and that's the first time he meets lance

when Keith yanks the door open he tells him to freaking stop because he's clearly not marco.

an older man, probably come to break up a fight, stops and blinks at keith before shouting over his shoulder about not remembering having or getting another kid (arthur "and who are you???" weasley style)

(our boy Lance has a minor panic about the cute random guy is his bathroom at 8 a.m.)

Keith gets shoved down at a table covered in food for breakfast and can't keep up he definitely has a headache and is ready to throw himself through a window when he's asked about his pokemon and if they need help too

he doesn't have pokeman and never has had one and isn't really interested and this family has centered their entire lives around it

- he sees the cubone again, in recovery and it paws a little at his hands in thanks

over the next few days, he stays with them and somehow gets roped into doing chores around the facility and given an assigned seat at their table for meals and he's just T H R O W N

they literally have an arbok taking a nap in a hammock in their backyard and a pod of seadras in an olympic pool in the gym just hanging out (doing little races between each other or chasing each other)

a vulpix he learns belongs to one of the McClain siblings (Rachel) sunbathes and sniffs at his feet while he’s working in the yard

and there's a persian destroying blinds in the living room window and a charizard in the kitchen

and some random small children he learns are marco's are throwing or shooting across the floor fridge magnets as a game with a magnemite

- begrudgingly on McClain’s part, keith’s assigned to Lance for being shown around the rehab center

lance takes him to the beach and out into the middle of the ocean on a boat

Keith: "this is where you feed me to a gryados"

Lance: "close"

and a freaking L A P RA S pops up out of the water and clicks at lance and makes little waves in his direction and they do a damn forehead touch he's crazy this is crazy

Keith: "YOU HAVE A LAPRAS???!!!!" - because even keith who doesn’t do pokemon knows what the heck a lapras is

Lance "I don't have a lapras. Nobody owns her. We just give her her room and protect or heal her when she needs it"

- the next few weeks see lance having to admit keith isn’t so bad and that just because he doesn’t have a pokemon, it doesn’t mean he actively dislikes them

the cubone is attached to keith - despite his bad attitude, lance says

this is the initial thought that kicked this off: keith asks if they have a 3D printer and once the cubone's injury is fully healed, he makes a mold for the missing piece and fits it in place

lance denies crying

"you've done one (1) good thing, kogane"

- then the real plot kicks in when the lapras is captured and taken from the beach by team rocket

lance blames keith because of the timing, because of keith's vague answers on where he's from, why he has no friends or family, no pokemon

insert painful, raw, yelled, "I TRUSTED YOU"

keith convinces him he's not part of team rocket and the main story starts where lance and keith leave to go after the lapras and return her to cuba.

- before they leave, rachel throws a pokeball at keith "i think your cubone might like this one"

and lance's eyes get huge because he knows what it is and then a pokemon is coming out of the pokeball

and it's a marowak

the cubone very carefully and slowly approaches her and the marowak just watches and waits. the cubone brushes its bone across the marowak's foot and then approaches and okay keith's eyes definitely water as he watches this marowak kind of take in the cubone.

(THE CRITICAL HIT COMES WHEN THE CUBONE EVENTUALLY EVOLVES. I like to think maybe through poke-magic the skull fixes itself when he evolves and the cubone hands the 3d mold back to keith and gets keith to put it on a chain safe for his skin to wear the 3d mold piece still)

- obv they get the lapras back,

they find out keith's mom was a double agent ofc for the team rocket faction that took the lapras

they meet hunk and pidge and allura and coran and romelle and others along the way to take down team rocket because what’s a pokemon au without the power of friendship

- keith and lance wait at the airport in cuba

it's for shiro, he had let keith travel because he saw that keith needed to find room to grow and find who he was

obviously keith is not 10. he and lance are 17.

anyways he rushes keith and pulls him into a big hug and tells keith how proud of him he is

the first thing lance tells shiro is about the time keith almost stepped on an exeggcute and how they chased him

or the time he almost sustained a skull fracture from a taurus and the time a seel thought keith was its mom

there was also that time with a magby-

keith: “OKAY LANCE WE GET IT THANK YOU”

BONUS:

keith being mildly terrified of the pokemon hanging around the McClain properties

Lance: "if you want to lay in the hammock just move him"

Keith: "just move him?! it's an arbok not a lap dog"

a nest of torchicks gets laid in the backyard and follows keith for two days after they hatch and lance laughs so hard he cries because keith can't shake them and he winds up tripping and they all jump on top of him

keith might not have been a pokemon person

but pokemon are definitely a keith person

#klance #Keith Kogane #Lance McClain #Voltron #VLD #writing tag

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camillemontespan · 5 years

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oblivion [raleigh carrera] [part one: rabbit hole]

I have no idea if I will continue this as I have so many series going on but I was hit by inspiration after I posted the teaser to this a few months ago. I’ve continued on from the teaser and written a first chapter.

Warnings: Discussion of drugs.

Taggin’ those who might like this and taggin’ those in my permalist (I’m not cheating on Drake!)

@pug-bitch @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @star-spangled-eyes @emichelle @ibldw-main @burnsoslow @katedrakeohd @jovialyouthmusic @fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore @sirbeepsalot @dcbbw @moonlightgem7 @mskaneko @notoriouscs @gardeningourmet @pedudley @drakesensworld @emomoustache

***************************************************************************

Raleigh looked up, his vision blurred. All he could see in front of him was the blurry lights of Vegas through the windows and the dancing figures of models clad in their underwear. They were dancing to his latest single; a single which Raleigh felt was shit.

His music had been shit lately. He knew it, the label knew it, the fans knew it but for some reason, everyone still wanted a piece of him. Everyone wanted a piece of Raleigh Carrera and they wouldn’t stop until they were through with him.

Raleigh was exhausted.

He had been holed up in this Vegas suite for three weeks now. He passed the time by drinking and hiring girls; anything to keep himself from thinking about her.

Marina Cortez.

Even her name was beautiful.

They had been in a fake relationship for publicity and the media had lapped it up. The Bad Boy of pop with the new American Dream.

Raleigh had shown her the underworld of New York, he had shown her the hidden nooks of Los Angeles. He had shown her a darker world, one filled with chaos and destruction, and she had loved it. She could have chosen to follow her mentor, Amery, and stay squeaky clean, a virginal figure with a chastity ring, preaching about love and peace. But she hadn’t wanted that. She had followed Raleigh into the dark.

Real feelings developed. Raleigh hadn’t meant for that to happen; he was always careful to keep girls at arms length. He knew he was bad for them. But as they kissed in his bed and whispered their secrets, deep secrets which they promised to keep protected, Raleigh felt a stirring in his heart and he knew he was done for.

Marina was all dark hair and soulful brown eyes. Someone as beautiful as she was should have been protected. Raleigh hadn’t wanted to hurt her; but when she turned to him one night, over the white powder on the glass coffee table and her credit card in her hand, smiling like she had a delicious but disturbing secret, Raleigh knew he had to leave. He had to leave her to save her.

His phone buzzed with a notification. Sighing, he rubbed his eyes and opened it. It was a news article from Hollywood Insider and the headline screamed: BREAKING: MARINA CORTEZ RUSHED TO HOSPITAL

Raleigh was on his feet in an instant. A blonde model slunk over to him, draping her arms around his neck, whispering, ‘Baby, where are you going?’ Raleigh pushed her away and stormed to the door, taking his leather jacket off the coat rack. He dialled his PA’s number.

‘Get me on the red eye to LA, now,’ he said shortly before hanging up.

He had been happy to just sink into oblivion; but this was different. He was not going to drag her under with him.

*********************************************************************

Raleigh landed in Los Angeles and a private car picked him up on the tarmac to take him to the hospital. Through the dark windows, Raleigh looked out at the city of angels and tried to push down the dread in the pit of his stomach.

The car drove down the highway and Raleigh had to avert his eyes when he saw the billboards with Marina emblazoned on them. The promotions for her new album were so far removed from the singer he once knew. She used to sing on stage with only her guitar - well, his guitar which he gave her as a gift- for company, the spotlight making her shine like an angel, and her voice which was like honey filled the arenas. That was all she needed to do. But a year later, the guitar was discarded and in its place was hardcore choreography, revealing costumes and autotune.

She had been turned into a bubblegum pop diva; the singers she used to hate.

The car slid through to the back entrance of the hospital and down an alley to a staff door. No paparazzi covered this area which was exactly what Raleigh wanted. He wanted to get into the building without any issue. Before the car could even come to a stop, he bolted out of the vehicle and burst through the staff door, the harsh lights of the staff corridor blinding him.

He rushed down the corridor, ignoring nurses who told him he wasn’t supposed to be in here. He reached the reception area and ignored the gasps of surprise from the people in the waiting room.

‘Marina Cortez, where is she?’ he demanded.

The receptionist blinked. ‘Uhh..I can’t give you that information, sir, it’s classified.’

‘Where the fuck is she?’ he hissed, slamming his hand on the reception desk, making her jump. He really didn’t want to pull the whole ‘do you know who I am’ dick move but he was tempted.

‘Sir, I’m sorry-’

‘I’m Raleigh fucking Carrera,’ he interrupted, already hating himself. ‘She’s my girlfriend. I need to know where she is otherwise I swear, I’m getting behind that desk, looking up your classified files and finding out that fucking room number myself. Where the hell is she?’

‘Fifth floor, room 763,’ the receptionist stammered.

Raleigh bowed his head and placed his hands together to look like he was praying. ‘Thank you,’ he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He turned on his heel and headed to the elevator, jabbing the button with his finger and wishing it would arrive sooner.

When the doors opened, he bolted inside and began his descent up to the fifth floor.

******************************************************

Raleigh let out a strangled sob when he saw her asleep in the bed. Her dark hair was fanned across the pillow, like she was a princess waiting in her tower to be saved by the hero of the book. Her olive skin looked pale.

He was about to move forward to take her hand but was stopped by a voice.

‘Mr Carrerra.’

He turned to find a doctor standing behind him. ‘I hear you’ve been threatening my staff.’

Raleigh turned red and shuffled on his feet awkwardly. ‘I’m so sorry.’

The doctor sighed and took out a folder. He gestured for Raleigh to sit down. Raleigh obeyed and watched warily as the doctor sat opposite him and opened the folder.

‘ I’m Dr Gregory,’ he said. ‘I understand she is your girlfriend.’

Raleigh bit his lip. Was his girlfriend. Was.

‘Do you know what happened to her?’ Dr Gregory asked.

Raleigh shook his head numbly.

‘She was found lying underwater in the bath,’ the doctor told him seriously. ‘She had taken drugs and was found by her publicist.'

Raleigh clenched his fists and dug his nails into his skin. He didn’t want to cry. He couldn’t. ‘How long was she underwater?’ he croaked.

‘A couple of minutes,' the doctor answered. 'Any longer and she wouldn't still be here.'

Raleigh closed his eyes. He couldn't imagine a world without Marina. His world without her right now was already dark and bleek. He thought back to past memories with her.

The night they made out on the hood of his car, her body on top of his, his hands placed on her ass which was clad in tiny denim shorts.

The lazy Sunday they had when they just stayed in bed all day watching Brooklyn 99, eating pizza and snuggled into each other.

The time they were in New York at the Met and Raleigh saw a rope prohibiting entrance to a secret room. He ignored the rules and took Marina with him; they snuck into the room, giggling as they went, before their mouths crashed together in a heated and desperate moment.

The night she whispered that she loved him and he whispered it back.

So many memories that he had cast to the back of his mind in his bid to try and get over her.

He wished he hadn’t done that. He had abandoned her right when she needed him. Why had he been such an asshole? Such a selfish asshole.

‘When can she be discharged?’ he asked quietly, looking at the floor.

‘I’d like to keep her overnight,’ the doctor told him. ‘Then we can discuss next steps.’

Raleigh’s head shot up. ‘Next steps?’

‘Yes,’ the doctor said. ‘She will need to go to rehab. Although from her past two failed attempts, I don’t know how successful this will be-’

‘She can stay with me,’ Raleigh interrupted. ‘I can help her get clean. I know how to do it because I’ve done it myself. Please. Just let me look after her-’

‘That won’t be necessary,’ a sharp voice said from the door. Raleigh looked up to see Marina’s publicist, Fiona, standing at the threshold. He stood up quickly, feeling himself shrink at the pure hatred in her eyes.

‘Fiona, I-’

Fiona held up a hand. ‘No, Raleigh. She will go to a rehabilitation centre where there are qualified professionals and proper treatments-’

‘Which haven’t worked!�� Raleigh burst out. ‘Whatever they do to her in there doesn’t work!’

‘What makes you think you can help?’ Fiona spat. ‘Or actually, a better question: what makes you think you are allowed to help?’

The doctor cleared his throat. ‘I’ll leave you two alone.’ He stood up and left the room.

Raleigh tried to find words. ‘Fiona-’

‘No,’ she interrupted. ‘This ends now. You led that poor girl down the rabbit hole and abandoned her when she needed you most. I have seen her worst days since you left; she has been crying, losing her temper at the slightest thing and staying in bed for days on end. The only time she would get up was to snort a new line.’

Raleigh closed his eyes, wishing she would stop talking, but Fiona bulldozed on.

‘She showed up at the recording studio bleary eyed and would take frequent ‘bathroom breaks’. She had no one but me and I tried, Raleigh, I really tried. I tried to get her out of bed and into a shower. I would hold her as she cried her eyes out. I.. I threw her drugs in the trash.’

Raleigh sighed. He didn’t want to tell Fiona that you never put an addicts drugs in the trash. It was the equivalent of throwing away their medicine; he knew because he had been that addict before.

‘Has Avery talked to her?’ he asked, hating the name on his lips. But he had to know. Avery was the one person who had always tried his hardest to keep Marina on the straight and narrow and encourage her to be the artist she was.

‘Avery isn’t allowed to see her,’ Fiona told him, her voice calmer now. ‘His label won’t let him. Apparently, being seen with Marina Cortez is now career suicide. They don’t want to tarnish his good boy image.’ Fiona spat these words, clearly angry at the injustice of the situation.

‘Micah?’

‘Micah is away touring,’ Fiona replied.

‘Shane then.’ Shane was Marina’s childhood friend who stuck with her through thick and thin.

‘He left her,’ Fiona whispered. ‘She pushed him too far and he lost his patience. Said he didn’t want to be around her anymore.’

Raleigh bit his lip. ‘If I’d known-’

‘You’d have raced to be with her?’ Fiona asked harshly. ‘You’d have become the knight in shining armour and saved her? Oh please.’

‘I didn’t realise how alone she was!’ Raleigh shouted, his temper flaring. ‘I didn’t know everyone had abandoned her! I thought she at least had Shane.’

Fiona slumped down on a chair and held her head in her hands. ‘You were wrong. She’s become a different person. All she wants is the next high and when she’s sober, she is quiet and uninterested. She won’t talk to me anymore. She shut people out who actually care about her and instead, she hangs out with freeloaders. You realise that when she goes out for drinks with those ‘friends’, she is the one who is left to pick up the $500 bar tab, right?’

Raleigh looked across at Marina who was still sound asleep. He slowly stood up and crouched down so he could be at her level and he smoothed her hair with his hand. ‘Those people are bloodsuckers,’ he whispered. ‘I’m not like that.’

Fiona stood up. ‘You are telling yourself that you’re here because you’re a good person. That you want to see her better. But truth be told, you’re here because you feel guilty. You want to fix this so that you can heal the hole in your heart that you feel. You don’t care about her, not really. You just want to make yourself feel better by being the last person by her side.’

‘Fuck you, Fiona,’ Raleigh spat, standing up again to face her. ‘That’s not true!’

‘Yes it is!’ Fiona said, her voice rising again. ‘Tell me, what were you doing before you hopped on a plane to get here, like the dashing hero you are?’

Raleigh turned red. Fiona crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. ‘I thought so.’

‘I’m here now!’ he pleaded, his voice desperate. ‘I want to be there for her. I want to help her. Please, let me. I know you hate me, everyone hates me. But she was the one good thing I had in my life and I ruined it. I want to make amends and if that means taking her home and looking after her while she screams at me, I don’t care, I want to do it.’

Fiona sighed. ‘Raleigh.. will she even want to see you?’

Raleigh looked down at Marina. ‘I honestly don’t know.. but I hope she will give me the benefit of a doubt.’

#raleigh carrera #platinum #choices fanfic #choices fanfiction

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gltrngold-a · 4 years

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— ♥　♡　♥　THE SOVEREIGN ♥　♡　♥ —

“It's more like a song on a policeman's radio, how we rolled up the carpet so we could dance, and the days were bright red, and every time we kissed there was another apple to slice into pieces.”

— crush, richard siken

｢ jodie comer. 23. female. she/her. ｣ welcome to cerulean pier, home of many mythological beings. did you know that our resident REGINA COLERIDGE is the child of ENYO? they don’t, maybe that’s why they’re known as the SOVEREIGN around town. they are PERSUASIVE & ENERGETIC, but also JUDGEMENTAL & CONCEITED. they are also currently AN ACTRESS. don’t say anything, but they are hiding THAT SHE ANONYMOUSLY SMEARED A COMPETITOR IN A MAGAZINE TO GET A LEAD ROLE. ｢ shannon, 20, she/her, bst. ｣

— ♥　♡　♥　basics ♥　♡　♥ —

name: regina florence coleridge age: twenty-three birthdate: 27 august, 1996 — cambridge, england zodiac ( sun ) sign: virgo orientations: pansexual, panromantic relationship status: single label: the sovereign occupation: actress

faceclaim: jodie comer height: 5 ft 8 in

— ♥　♡　♥　personality ♥　♡　♥ —

mbti: estp-a enneagram: seven, with an eight wing hogwarts house: slytherin temperament: choleric theme song: copycat by billie eilish

hobbies: martial arts, running, binge-drinking ( oops. ) spinning, astrology, tarot ( don’t tell anyone ! ) partying, mostly. modelling / being people’s muse in general captivates her.

— ♥　♡　♥　favourites ♥　♡　♥ —

songs:

new rules by dua lipa all i ever wanted by basshunter what hurts the most by cascada

television series:

green wing (2004-2007) community (2009-2015) fleabag (2016-2019)

books:

confessions of a teenage drama queen (dyan sheldon, 1999) good omens (neil gaiman and terry pratchett, 1990) bridget jones’ diary (helen fielding, 1996)

films:

home alone (1990) bill & ted’s excellent adventure (1989) drop dead fred (1991)

— ♥　♡　♥　summary ♥　♡　♥ —

okay so here’s the hoedown throwdown about cerulean pier’s party princess, regina! tw for drugs and alcohol mentioned, though not in detail, below.

i think there’s definitely sidney pierce from gypsy in her. and a little hayes morrison from conviction.

extrovert #1 and snack fiend. chaotic bisexual bastard.

obviously she doesn’t know anything about her life pre-island, but she still sounds english. perfectly received-pronunciation and lovely, and yes, people stay jealous and pressed about it.

her ( fake ) father is a politician. and as you can imagine, politics was the true love of his life, in and outside the home, and it didn’t exactly foster the closest relationship with him.

because of that and the obvious absence of her mother — enyo — she’s never really gotten the sense that anyone owes anyone commitment ?

she did briefly progress with her one serious relationship, but with that having ended two years ago, she’s mega regressed, folks.

regina is a little too willing to throw hands, start fights, etc. ( she came out to attack people and she’s having such a good time right now. it’s the enyo in her. ) it’s a personal favourite thing of hers to throw hands with rings on. it’s pretty and painful and what’s better than that?

through back-room connections ( in some ways scrupulous, some ways not ) the eighteen year old was given a place at the prestigious drama school, and became the muse of a leading director.

however, that didn’t come without being willing to play the game. did i mention the one who came with her to drama school? her best friend, who was the other person who caught the director’s eye.

so regina did what seeing her father in politics for so long taught her: go secretive, go underhanded, and it will get you far. because she was never taught not to. sabotaging others subtly while smiling too-sweetly to their faces had made her queen bee, and it was a strategy she wasn’t going to be letting go of any time soon.

she’s got acting awards, people! they sit in pride of place on her mantelpiece and she cares for them like they’re her own children. so yeah, ‘gina’s pretty darn famous and she’s having a great time with it. getting herself entangled romantically and otherwise with the elite is her favourite game!

she’s just a messy bitch who lives for drama. and the world is giving it to her.

she’s developed several issues with alcohol and substance abuse over the last couple years, especially since her break-up. it’s an unfortunate side-effect of the crowds she got in with, and never really having the influence in her life to pull her away from it / tell her to go to rehab. someone really should do that.

— ♥　♡　♥　wanted connections ♥　♡　♥ —

fans — she’d hardly be famous without them! give me people who know regina’s work and love her for it. we can plot whether they get on or if it’s a never meet your idols kind of scenario !

nemesis — someone who just can’t stand regina, no matter how she may try to swindle and charm them. they’re determined to let cerulean pier know who their ‘queen bee’ really is.

squad — bring me ye party-goers, ye chaos-creators, ye bitches! there’s no queen bee without a hive, and there’s no group of people regina coleridge loves more than her guys and gals. getting themselves in the magazines since the very beginning, baby!

best friend — the one regina stabbed in the back to get the acting job. they still don’t know it was her, they’re still absolutely brilliant friends, and regina feels no remorse for it whatsoever, so let’s give ourselves some fun future angst here. after all, it’s a secret she’s been sitting on for five years without telling.

unrequited crush — let’s force regina to face the reality of there being someone she wants but she just can’t have. fun slap in the face here. she needs it.

one night stands — past, present, or future, the promiscuous party princess truly is down for whatever (when it comes to you) !

eventual romantic interest because let’s make her feel something. could be slow burn. doesn’t have to be. let’s talk about it.

#gods:intro

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maxburnett · 3 years

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Chandelier, TJ Hammond

- (asexual!fem!reader x TJ Hammond)

Summary: Soulmate - Your soulmate understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of peace, calmness, and happiness. Two broken individuals find peace and love when trying to fix the shambles in their lives caused by years of addictions.

Warnings: angst, self-loathing, mentions of drugs, mentions of suicide, fluff, happy ending

If you recognize this, I uploaded it about a month ago. I just wanted to make an aesthetic for it and I didn't like the format of the description etc. I own nothing but my writing; things in italics are quotes found on Google.

Words: 1,654

~ Recovery ~

Recovery is an acceptance that your life is in shambles, and you have to change.

He had never wanted to be like this; he had never wanted drugs and alcohol to rule his life; TJ had always wondered what had happened? Why was he such a failure to his parents? Why did he hate who he was and who he had become? Would things ever even get better for him? After two attempts to end it all, after everything he had put his family through, TJ thought maybe he had found common ground and a purpose when he had woke up in the hospital bed with his mother sitting there by his side; however, like always it didn’t last.

He lasted a whole six months being clean and sober, then one day, everything came crashing right back down, and he felt like a thunderstorm with no umbrella or cover. After six whole months, he was back on the bottle, waking up after blacking out, not even remembering drinking the night before. He started cocaine again a couple of weeks later, but this time, he knew he needed help, and he got his mom to put him into rehab once more.

That’s when he met her, beautiful as broken as he was; an addict for ten years, in and out of rehab; losing everything, lost to the world, and a failure to her parents. They had laid on the ground outside of the rehab facility talking about their problems while holding hands, and everything lined up perfectly. In a world where TJ had felt that everyone was out for him; that the world would be a better place without him; she showed up, and her eyes, those (Y/E/C) eyes, were the beacon of light showing him the way to find his way back. He still thought back to that night; they had laid on the ground, holding hands as they laughed together at TJ telling her the dumbest jokes, and then their conversation moved to the talk about past relationships and the root of all of their problems. They then realized that those two broken people who had questioned everything that had happened in their lives had found their person.

After rehab, they both stayed in touch, texting, telling each other how their Recovery was going; saying “I Love You” in the texts was just second nature, and they meant those words; TJ was in love with her. It felt nice to be able to say that he was in love with someone. Did all “Love” have to be romantic? Did you need the sex and the complications that came with a “relationship” to feel the meaning of true love?

Then it happened, one little fight with his parents over something, and he had a drink again; one drink turned into two; two turned into 4. He needed her; he needed his saving grace.

~Relapsing~

The disease of addiction is a chronic, devious bitch just waiting for you to slip up.

Y/N woke up at the sound of her phone and groaned as she looked over at the clock. Three missed calls—one voicemail. That’s when the alarm set in, and she quickly sat up and pressed play on the phone and listened with bated breath, not sure what she should be expecting. She listened intently and sighed as barely audible sobs filled her ears.

“I’m such a fuck up,” he breathed and let a sob escape his lips. “No wonder my parents don’t want to put up with me … sometimes I wonder why you seem to put up with me.” His voice is shaky and begins to sound hoarse. “I don’t know how you stayed by my side after all this time … when you know I’m going to do nothing but fuck up and disappoint,”

He laughs a little to himself, and her heart breaks as she stands and gathers some clothes, rushing out to her car after grabbing her keys; she listens to the voicemail and hears something that sounds like broken glass as she drives to TJ’s apartment and uses her key to open it up. She rushes in and finds him sitting on the floor in his bathroom. TJ was holding his hand close to his t-shirt as the blood dripped down his hand, and she looked up and saw a broken mirror.

“Look at me, TJ, I’m here,” she said and softly kissed his forehead. “I’m here, baby,” she said as she held him close to her. He rested his head onto her chest, hands clutching her oversized shirt she had been sleeping in as he sobbed and apologized over and over. She helped get him into the shower; he was in such a state of distress that she got into the shower with him still fully clothed to help hold him up. He ended up turning and wrapping his arms around her after the cold water brought him to his senses a little. After they got out of the shower, both changing into dry clothes, she led him to his bed and went around the apartment, and poured out what other alcohol he had before joining him beside him on the bed.

“I’m sorry, kitten,” he said, causing her to smile at that playful nickname he had given her. He breathed out as he laid his head against her hair and giggled against it. “You came here at 3 in the morning,” he hummed against her hair, causing her to playfully hit his chest and look up at him with sad eyes.

“Of course I would; you’re everything to me,” she whispered, and he smiled down at her and pushed some hair out of her face before softly pressing his lips against hers, causing her to freeze. “Please don’t do that,” she whispered and cupped TJ’s face, and he looked at her with a questioning look.

“I-I’m sorry,” TJ stammered, not sure what had gotten into him.

“I’m not mad,” she said with a shake of her head. “Not mad at all, I just … I don’t like that sort of contact,” she said and held onto both of his hands, causing him to look into her eyes with a confused frown. “I’m asexual … I just don’t get feelings like that,” she said and looked into his bright blue eyes. “But know this, TJ, I love you, and I’ve never loved anyone the way that I love you.”

“And I love you,” TJ said as he closed his hands around hers and pressed a gentle kiss to her nose, giggling as she smirked up at him and did the same.

“You’re cute, TJee, I’ll give you that,” she smiled and laid her head down into the crook of his neck as he wrapped his arms tightly against her.

~All I Need~

Soulmate is an overused term, but a true soul connection is very rare, and very real.

Y/N smiled as she looked around the apartment that she and TJ now shared, her head resting on his chest as he ran his hand up and down her back as she played a video game while lying on his chest. She smiled up at him as he looked down at her with those favorite pair of blue eyes before drawing small circles over the fabric of her t-shirt.

“You’re distracting me, TJ!” She said and giggled as he swooped her up and laid her down, and began to tickle her. “Stop it!” She let out a fit of giggles. “You ass!” She laughed and tried to get him off of her.

“Make me,” he said, sticking his tongue out at her playfully, and she pushed him off playfully before she sat up and caught him staring at her.

“What?” She asked as she absentmindedly played with the ring on her finger that TJ had bought her when she told him that emeralds were her favorite gemstones.

“Just taking in how cute you are, kitten,” he said and leaned in and snuck in a gentle kiss to her cheek and watched as Y/N placed a soft kiss to his nose and giggled as she put the controller to the side and let his arms wrap around her. She stretched and changed the input on the television and put on a channel they both liked and traced circles on his white t-shirt; she watched his face contently as he smiled at what was playing on the television and smiled as he closed his hands around hers as he held her. She closed her eyes, wondering what life would bring them, and found herself turning to look back into TJ’s blue eyes.

“Would you ever want kids? Me to have kids? I mean, there’s a way we can-,” he placed a finger against her mouth and smiled as he softly moved the finger down.

“Whatever life brings our way, I’m going to be right by your side, and if a kid is in our future, then it happens. I hope it has my good looks,” he smirked and laughed as she slapped his shoulder with a smile and leaned to place a kiss onto his pink lips.

“Love you,” she murmured into his lips. TJ smiled as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer into the kiss, they didn't kiss like this often but when they did it was one of his favorite things int he world.

"Love you too, Kitten," he murmured against the kiss.

What they had, they never had to explain. Yes, technically, TJ was sexually attracted to men, but his heart was hers, and hers belonged to him. She had even told him that she didn’t mind if he chose to sleep with men while they were together, but he refused, saying that his body belonged to her. He didn’t need to sleep with random men anymore to fill the void that he had inside of him all of those years, because now his heart was filled with the greatest love he had ever as far as their friends and parents knew, they were a normal couple; but for them, this was their normal, and they wouldn’t have it any other way.

Tag List:

@fuckandfluff @fairyevans @mickey-henry @buckyblues @bloomingbucky @fluffycutecevans @midnightf @fallinforevans @deanscherry @buckyssimp

(Let me know if you would like to be tagged in future fics! Also please let me know if you would not like to be tagged.) Please remember to reblog! Support all creators by sharing/reblogging! Hope you guys enjoy.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x fluff #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #sebastian stan #sebastian stan x fluff #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x you #tj hammond #tj hammond x fluff #tj hammond x reader tj hammond x you #bucky barnes x fanfiction #sebastian stan x fanfiction #tj hammond fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #political animals fanfiction

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finderskeepersff · 5 years

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63. Part 2

We have not even left, the plane hasn’t even taken off and I am worried already. I am leaving my son for the first time, I mean I am not worried that Cassius can’t look after him but it’s like what if he struggles and I am not there. It’s like I have left my heart at home “I know that look Sofia, stop it. I am sure he will be ok, he seems quiet” she knows I want to run back to them “he is, it is because I have told him. About what happened” Amira let out an oh “and how did it go? Do you feel better about it?” nodding my head “I do but I also feel bad that I told him, I feel like I have hurt him. He was so hurt, he said anybody but you. But I think it will make him aware on how I feel about things, I said to him that I don’t hate him for it but if I do get that way you know why. It could have been worse” it really could have been “right, I just want Kyle and him to make up now. It’s weird to have them like this, Kyle seems so lost without him too. Kyle hates the thing they do anyways, he knows he has messed up. I feel like Kyle is shrugging it off like Cassius will make it up to him but I think Cassius is really like done with him” my eyes near buldged out “what!?” I spat “seriously, Cassius is on this new me vibe, he is keeping face but I think he will keep his distance with what he is doing, I see Cassius playing no games with things. He will build himself back up but bigger and better with nobody by his side like he was before, I see it” Amira has been really thinking on this “that is his best friend Amira, that is stupid” Amira moved in her seat facing me “listen to me, I think what will happen. Cassius will build his empire without Kyle, and then he will be friends with him but this time, it won’t be for business. Just friends. I know it, trust me on this but I think Kyle will be upset. I think Cassius has cut him off, he is angry with him. Kyle has let him down before” letting out an oh “well you should know it more then me, but I would never let that happen. They will be friends” Kyle is a good man so I will not let Cassius do that.

I hope I haven’t upset him too much, I hope I haven’t put back his healing process because of this. It does feel like a weight has been lifted from me but what about him, he did take it well but I am worried for him. What is he not showing me that he may do now I’m gone, will he vent his anger elsewhere. I know that has hurt him so much, and I have forgiven him for it. Looking out of the plane window, I miss them both already. I really wish Cassius said he needed me to stay back because then I would have, I wouldn’t have gone at all. I need to just clear my mind, it’s a little break away with my friends and if anything was to go wrong he would let me know which it is straight forward, I have laid everything out for him. Told him to put the dirty clothes in the hamper, the hamper is literally in his face. I moved it because I want him to see it’s there, he will only travel so far into the room to search for it. Maybe I am babying him, but I just want him to have a good time with his son and not say he was crying throughout “I miss my son” I said, Amira groaned out “see I can’t say I miss Kyle, because I really don’t but that’s your baby. You gave birth to that so of course you will feel it, it’s just a few days. Stop it” taking in a deep breath “it is” I mumbled “I’m being dramatic now” let me stop now because the girls will hate me.

I am anxious in meeting my friends, they said they will see me at the airport but I am just anxious in seeing them after all this time. Mia seeing Cassius come back from rehab and then all this mess, I just don’t want them to judge me on this wedding thing “this fertile bitch!” Olivia spat, looking to the side of me and Olivia hugged me “you fertile fucking bitch! Oh my god!” I laughed out hugging Olivia back “oh god, I have missed you so much Sofia. To see you again, I thought we lost you!” I feel choked up “never, I love you guys so much” I breathed out “it’s been months Sofia, I just thought you didn’t want to know” I did ditch them “I am sorry, I would never let you go” moving back from the hug “don’t cry, I was just worried. You my sister, I love you so much. You know that” I am so emotional “I know but I just feel bad, it’s so good to see you, you look so well” I strained out “and you pregnant again, you look so well. Don’t cry, we can spend some time together now. Amira, girl how are you” Olivia walked by me “bitch” Mia said with her arm open “Mia” hugging her “I love you girl, you look well” I smiled wide, I am happy to see my friends.

Turning around in the SUV “if you wasn’t pregnant I would make you sit in the back but Mia told me, how is Cassius? Is he ok now?” taking in a deep breath “he is well thank you, he is taking care of Cartier for me. I am slightlly nervous, but he is well. He is more content and I couldn’t be happier with him. Cassius doesn’t see it but he has so much love, look at you girls asking about him. It means so much to me but he is well” Olivia smiled at me “he’s a good guy, I know I fucked up that time and I am sorry but he is a good guy. You think he will be ok with the nephew?” nodding my head “well I erm hope so” I chuckled “if not then we got problems” then I will have to go back “I am nervous though, like very nervous because it’s me leaving my son and yes I am going to keep on talking about it” the girls groaned out “bitch you need to relax but you going to be the good girl in the group, I hope he knows we going to the club. You don’t even look pregnant” letting out an oh, I didn’t get that part of the memo.

The girls wanting to go othe club, I mean I didn’t think we would be doing this and also I am becoming a very boring bitch I know but I don’t think Cassius will like it “you’re pulling that stupid face” Mia pointed at me “well you know me” placing my bag on the bed “yes I know you, you know we was about to turn up. Yes I know you can’t drink but we got to have fun” nodding my head “I know, I will stop being a boring bitch. I will just check on Cassius. It’s been a few hours” searching for my phone in my bag “ok you do that. Don’t worry about him, honestly. I think he will be ok, we will look after you too” smiling at Mia, seeing a text from Leyton. Unlocking my phone to check the text.

From: Leyton

To: Sofia

He is so cute!! he looks like us and that is good. Are you in California now?

All of my family say that but he does have Cassius in him, I want my son to have Cassius in him and be like this dad, replying back to Leyton.

From: Sofia

To: Leyton

He does and yes I am in Cali now, speak soon

Pressing send on the message and tapping on Cassius name to call him, I hope Cartier is being good. He should be asleep now, I did write this down for him but will cassius read rules, he wont “hey bub, you get there?” I love him “I did, I am here. I am ready to go home now, I think I am done here” I laughed as I turned around to sit on the bed “don’t say that, you have fun, is the place nice where you at? I hope it ain’t tacky” biting on my bottom lip, I love hearing his voice “it’s nice, it’s a mansion type thing anyways. She did well, the weather is nice here, how is my baby?” I can’t hear him “I am ok” Cassius and I both laughed “you know who I am speaking on, is he ok?” it is very quiet “he is asleep, I gave him his bottle. I burnt my wrist, I don’t get all that checking wrist bullshit, so I did that. And he fell asleep, now I am just downsatirs. I spoke to Henry and he was just telling me that I should forgive myself for what I did, I am finding that part hard, because I am so sorry” pulling a face “stop it, it’s ok. I am happy you are speaking to Henry but I want you to be ok, I want you to see you wasn’t there, I forgive you. Please don’t be upset about it” he sighed out, maybe telling him I am going out at night is a bad thing because then he may think things and I don’t want that “I love you Cassius and you know that” I think I will keep that away from him.

Stood on the balcony as I smoked my blunt, I should be proud with what I got and what I have done. I mean from what I had, I had no life and now I got a son, another baby on the way and a wife, that is a lot for me. I am trying to keep positive, I am trying to seek positive energy and I need this blunt before Cartier wakes up, I went to sleep at eleven I think and I made sure I was going to be awake before him. Squinting my eyes at Kyle just coming back home, wonder where he has been. It’s like seven in the morning, could be the club but he ain’t on my list of people to do things. Placing the blunt between my lips, seeing everyday people just waking up to go to work, it is rather cool to see the world just going by. Blowing the smoke out from my lips seeing Fabian walking at front of my yard, he looked up at me and I just nodded my head as I moved back. Looking over at Kyle’ crib, he also looked at me but I turned away. I am cool on that end.

Wrapping the towel around my waist, I can hear Cartier crying. I had the chance to shower, he luckily let me do that. Jogging out of the bathroom, I should have put Cartier in my room but I didn’t. I am feeling a little high, I mean I am ok. Jogging down the hallway and to Cartier’ room, pushing the door open. Cartier is stood up crying “hey” I smiled at him and he let go dropping into the crib, I don’t think he wanted to see me at all. Walking over to his crib “Cartier! Son, you can’t be doing that to me” looking down into the crib, he cried out “aight cool, you are doing that to me” reaching into the crib and grabbing his pacifier “here” placing it in his mouth “I need to get some clothes on” tightening the towel around me “so you need to just relax in my room until I can just feed you” picking him out of the crib, holding him out to me “I am wet too, but you got to cheer up. You can’t be crying on me like this, we boys” Cartier is quiet now so I will take that.

I snorted laughing “yooo, your mom would kill me. This shit is bad” this whole feeding business is not me, he got this nasty ass shit everywhere. All in his hair, face and clothes. He rules me and he knows it “you laughing player? Son, you laughing at me” he knows, he is laughing at me “I ain’t even sure if I fed you, you good? You ate?” Cartier looked down at his hands, he made a mess and I have to clean this “I should have stuck to milk, I ain’t made for this Cartier” getting up from the chair, my phone started ringing “if momma asks, I did good” looking over at the kitchen counter, it is Ethan “it ain’t her” Cartier screamed out clapping his hands together “yo” nobody has this number yet, just Ethan for now “meeting at the club?” I forgot that “yes, you right we are. I am coming” I did request this meeting and I forgot all about it.

Ethan looked at me and then Cartier “push the damn stroller inside then?” I said to Ethan just staring at me and Cartier “it’s bring your son to work day, didn’t you know. Take that in for me” fixing Cartier in my arms “I can tell, did you go out of your way to match. Fabian, Laurence” Ethan said behind me as I made my way into the club with Cartier, I am bringing my son to work, it’s just a meeting anyways. And I did go out of my way to match us both so that is a thing “Cassius Warren, he lives. He is alive, he bought along his prodigy” Raphael said “he is better than me” I said as I made my way over to Rapheal “actually Ethan, just hold my son for me” looking behind me “actually he is still trying to bring a stroller in here” I held out Cartier to Fabian, Fabien grinned as he took Cartier from me “the young boss” turning to Raphael “are we hugging?” He said, my fist met his face, he stumbled back a little “you call me a pussy again, I will kill you” Raphael laughed “he remembered, you are funny. I missed you Cassius. It’s nothing, I have had worse” I ain’t forget that.

Raphael keeps touching his cheek, I did actually bruise his face which makes me happy because he think he funny talking shit about me. Taking my son’ beanie off of his head “cold out there ain’t it?” placing him a top of the table “let’s take your jacket off, you being a good boy today ain’t you” unbuttoning his jacket, Cartier is thinking who the fuck are these people “so you really went to rehab then? Again?” Raphael asked “I did, but what does it matter?” smiling at Cartier as I placed his jacket on my lap “you can sit on the table, you the boss son” he is the boss on this “where is your little bitch? Him” he clicked his fingers “Kyle” he pointed “he is at home, where he should be” sitting back in my chair “he should be killed for what he has done you know that right? He lost my money too, and my drugs. This is bad business, you should kill him” licking my lips staring at raphael, he ain’t loyal “I think you need to back up Raphael, I ain’t doing shit like that. And if you try it, I mean it I will kill you and yours” Raphael put his hands up “I wouldn’t ever” Fabian placed Cartier’ toys near him “thank you” I said to Fabian “it’s good to see you Cassius” Ethan said “likewise, I am alive and ready” I am ready.

Staring at the pictures of Kalia’ family “so these were taken when she visted, that is true. There is a file on you Cassius but she isn’t even on it anymore, they took her off a while ago because she couldn’t get you, so I entered the room and sat there. She near died, like she was going to cry. I was like you see this, remember it and walked out. If this plays out she could be a big person in our dealings” Ethan said as he sat down “so that checks out, with that being said. We don’t need to move in silence like we do, you know those places we can’t go, that shipment we can’t get too. Bitch got a badge, but I need to be there. She will do anything for me, I see it anyways. What I want you to do, we need to watch her. We need pictures of her picking up our drugs up, also taking drug money so we have something on her, you know what I mean right? We can fuck up her career. She wants to be our informant then so be it, call her too” Cartier turned to me “yes boy” I smiled at him, he held out his toy to me “you want daddy to have it” taking it from him, he turned his body to me “come here” picking him up and placing him on my lap “hello?” Kalia said on the speakerphone “imagine that, having a number you never gave me” pressing a kiss to the top of Cartier’ head “Cassius” she breathed out “don’t say my name out loud now, you ready?” I love this boy so much “is that a yes?” She said, looking over at Ethan “let the games begin” I said while nodding my head at Ethan as he disconnected the call, Raphael slow clapped his hands “you my friend, will always come on top” least he knows.

“I feel like because my drugs went missing, I get a new cut of more money” I had to laugh “even my son can make a better decision than you, you think I will let your goofy ass take more money. Your team is gone, they mine. Half of your people are dead or back in France, you are nothing here in America my man, you ain’t shit Raphael. You foreign, you played a game of mine you see. You did something that only a druggy would do, and that is trust me. You think people die for nothing? Ethan is my person. These people are loyal to me Raphael, you pissed me off and also you are alone, you have nobody here left. They dead, you think everything is funny or a joke to you, it ain’t a joke Raphael. You can be dead and people would think you back in France while I generate money on your name, shipments on your name motherfucker. You know what, you see these. Two of my son’s favourite toys, this one” I placed on the table on the left “is to keep you alive and this” placing the second one at the side “to kill you” Raphael’ face dropped “I don’t need weak links, if you want to play we can. Which toy you want son” lifting Cartier up “wait! Cassius, I get it! I am crazy!” he spat “just please, I have no issues, I am stupid. I just want to be alive and die under some pussy that is me friend. I will do anything for you, I can get you anything” placing Cartier back on my lap “disrespect my name again, you are dead!” I pointed at him.

He disrespected my name, saying I have gone mad. I think the fuck not, Cartier fell asleep in the stroller “I am boss in France, I am sorry friend. I was high and I not realize it, you know me” nodding my head “anyways, we move forward yeah? I am letting you off with this Raphael, you hear this. I know you are a good guy but you talk too much, you speak on me badly and it looks bad. We will be this high, we will be good yeah?” Raphael nodded his head “I trust you always Cassius, I shall go now” turning to Ethan “dude is crazy” Ethan said “he talk too much Ethan, so things are ok now? We will get this up and running but on the low” Ethan nodded his head “you ruthless though, your son going to deicde someone life” I chuckled “I am a bastard, what can I say? I just don’t want people talking down on me. I am ruthless, you know why now more than ever. I have my fucking mind with me, I ain’t high anymore. I am me, I am getting everyone out there. I ain’t letting nobody get in my way, even my own dad. Kyle is no more either, he can stay away from this. You hear that, until further notice. Kyle is a no, but he stays alive!” I spat, I have things to figure out now to go ahead with my things.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Fanfic #Fanfiction

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nervousgaylaughter · 5 years

Text

how’d we end up on a road we never took (chapter 3)

read on ao3

Kate doesn’t know quite yet whether she would rather be cheering right now.

It’s been half an hour and Riley has not stopped interrogating Eva.

Annleigh won’t stop reminding Riley about the no significant others during official cheer activities rule, but Riley insists this is an exception because it can be a learning experience.

Cairo is glaring at Eva so hard that Kate thinks she might burn a hole in her head.

That just leaves Chess, Farrah, and Kate in tense silence while Reese tries to make conversation.

“Guys I think we can be really good this year if we have the right attitude,” Reese says with a giant smile. Kate resists her natural urge to roll her eyes and instead just nods. She feels bad for the mascot who has tried out for the team every year to no avail. Kate knows Reese deserves to be on the team more than most people, more than herself even, but is too scared to say it out loud.

Chess and Farrah don’t even respond. The two girls rarely speak around each other after the incident. Farrah hates Chess for dropping her, and Chess feels so bad that she just stays quiet around the younger girl.

The sad part is that Kate knows if things went slightly differently, they could have been there for each other. Chess has always been the resident mom friend, and she had talked with Kate about how she wanted to take Farrah under her wing. How they could go to rehab together and finally get better. But that was before the Tigers went viral.

That’s just the bullshit that’s high school, Kate thinks, one bad thing feels like the whole world is crumbling down.

Reese goes on and on and on as Kate doesn’t listen but pretends like she is until it’s finally halftime. As soon as the clock hits zero Kate jumps up and says, “Eva and I are going to get some concessions.”

“Is that codeword for make out in the bathroom?” Farrah mutters as Eva and Kate awkwardly stare at each other.

“Why do you always have to do that?” Annleigh asks as she looks at her sister. They begin to bicker, and Kate uses that as their cue to leave.

“Eva I am so sorry I should have warned you how much of a mess our team is,” Kate says as they leave the bleachers.

“It’s fine, West High isn’t much better believe it or not. “

“No way, you guys are so good?”

“We have so much drama Kate. And they didn’t take it very well when I came out and stuff,” Eva says with a sadness to her voice.

“Eva that’s horrible I’m sorry. Here Riley just likes to remind us that we are all accepted no matter what color of the rainbow with which we identify as she stares at me and Cairo stares at her,” Kate says with a laugh.

Eva chuckles and says, “Yeah I thought Cairo was actually going to murder me there for a second.”

“She’s so in love with Riley and refuses to see it, it’s ridiculous.”

“They’d be such a cute couple.”

The girls talk about the Tigers squad as they get to the concession stand. Eva gets a bad of M&M’s while Kate gets Airhead Xtremes and Twizzlers as Eva pulls out her wallet. Kate begins to take out some cash, but Eva stops her.

“You got the coffee earlier, I got this,” Eva says as she hands the cashier the money.

“Thanks Eva,” Kate says opening her Airheads.

“I can’t say I’m not judging the fact that you want Twizzlers though.”

“They aren’t for me,” Kate explains, “They’re for Chess. She loves them.” Eva looks at her questioningly as Kate continues, “Don’t look at me it’s not my fault Chess has negative tastebuds.”

The girls make their way back to the cheerleaders as halftime comes to a close. Kate chucks the Twizzlers at an unsuspecting Chess, who laughs at being hit smack dab in the middle of her head.

Surprisingly, the rest of the game goes by uneventfully. Cairo has finally captured Riley’s attention as the girls have a conversation with Annleigh, Farrah, and Reese leaving Chess, Kate, and Eva to themselves.

Kate is shocked at how easy conversation comes with Eva. The only person she’s ever been able to talk to for hours on end and enjoy herself is Chess. But between the three of them, Kate forgets that she’s supposed to be the gloomy one in the group.

As Chess and Eva talk about skateboarding Kate tunes out for a second. She thinks about how much she’s enjoying being around Eva. All she can do is hope they can remain friends after their staged breakup because she can see their trio becoming a solid unit.

The game ends with the Tigers losing 46-0 and Riley brings all the girls in for a departing pep talk.

“So you all already know Cairo and I are conducting auditions for a new freshman tomorrow after school which means the annual sleepover will be Saturday! Think about ways in which we can use our spirit to make the school a better place. See you all there!”

Kate raises her eyebrows in mock excitement as Riley finishes her speech.

Eva grabs Kate’s hand as the rest of girls go their separate ways. Kate knows they agreed holding hands was alright, but it still shocks her and causes her heart to beat ever so quickly.

You’re just nervous, holding hands is new territory, Kate tells herself.

Chess approaches the duo, “Kate is Eva giving you a ride or do you want me to take you home?”

“I can do it-” Eva begins but Kate interrupts, “Eva you live on the other side of town. Chess is a few houses down from me it’ll be easier.” Eva nods and Kate realizes she doesn’t quite know how to say goodbye.

It’s just Chess who’s with them, so they don’t have to sell their relationship in this moment, but Kate still doesn’t know what to do. Do they hug? Do they wave? A kiss on the cheek or something similar seems like something a couple would do, but they agreed kissing was passing a line.

Luckily Eva isn’t as awkward as Kate, so she squeezes the girl’s hand as she walks away towards her own car. Kate smiles as she walks away, and Chess watches her friend’s gaze.

Kate gets into Chess’s car with a cheesy smile on her face, one that’s usually reserved for Chess's antics, but now it belongs to Eva too.

Chess begins to drive before she says anything to smaller girl.

“Kate can you promise me something?”

“Yeah…” Kate replies suspicious but trusting of her friend.

“Just, please take care of your heart.” Kate is a bit confused by the statement and doesn’t respond so Chess continues, “You don’t fall for people often but when you do it’s hard and you get reckless with your own feelings.”

“Chess I’m not actually dating Eva, you know that. This arrangement won’t hurt anyone.”

“I know. I just wanted to make sure,” Chess says earnestly.

And Kate wouldn’t accept anyone else’s advice like this, but this is Chess and everything is different when she’s with her best friend.

“Thanks for always looking after me Chess. I don’t know what I’m gonna do without you.”

“It’s only college Kate and we still have a whole year left together,” Chess says glancing at Kate as they pull into her driveway.

The girls say their goodbyes for the night as Kate makes her way towards her room.

As she’s getting ready for bed, she sees that Eva texted her.

Eva: I had fun tonight, thanks for letting me tag along

Kate: if you had fun tonight you might be a psychopath and in that case this isn’t gonna work out

Eva: Ok Riley was a little intense, but I enjoyed talking to you and Chess.

Kate: ig that’s fair we are the most fun people on the team

Eva: Oh in that case I’m so lucky I ended up with you

Eva: I mean like being friends with you out of everyone else

Kate: well in my case i’m lucky i ended up friends with the pizza girl

Kate: you better get me free pizza

Eva: I don’t think that’s allowed

Kate: i'm breaking up with you

Eva: Lol, goodnight Kate

Kate: night

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day goes by uneventful. Luckily Kate doesn’t have to participate in tryouts so she only had to go to her classes and could go home right after. Unluckily, however, is that both Chess and Eva are working so Kate has no one to hang out with.

So instead she takes some self-care time before she has to deal with the sleepover tomorrow.

Kate is really not looking forward to it. She can name at least ten different ways to die that are bound to be less painful than a night with the squad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before she has too much time to overthink it, Kate finds herself getting into Chess’s car to make their way to the sleepover Saturday night.

“Please please please can we just go back to your house instead and have our own sleepover,” Kate begs.

“Kate we’ve been over this,” Chess says as she lists the reasons why this is a good thing. Unfortunately Riley only lives about five minutes away so Kate doesn’t have a long enough ride to persuade Chess to bail.

They park on the street outside Riley’s house and Kate tries one final attempt to get Chess to leave with her. Chess once again refuses and they walk towards the Williams’s home together, waiting to see what the night might bring.

#we are the tigers #we are the tigers fanfiction #how'd we end up on a road we never took #watt #my writing #kate x eva

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garglyswoof · 6 years

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A slice of life kastle fic (read: nothing happens in this ok) for Luce’s birthday @lclrgsl because she is my favorite potato, and damn it, it’s still her birthday in my time zone so I call it a win. (IT’S NOW ON MY CALENDAR FOREVER YOU CAN NEVER ESCAPE BUT LOOK HOW FAST I WROTE FOR YOU IT’S A MIRACLE)

It’s Curtis that gives her a heads up first. He leaves a message, gives a time and a place, and adds that Frank most definitely isn't aware of this call. She smiles at this, because it’s good to hear that someone has his back - it makes her feel a little less alone knowing that he isn't.

She dresses carefully, rolls her eyes at herself in the mirror even as she tries another top, and settles for a work outfit she’s always gotten compliments on. She can pass it off as running straight from the office, she thinks, smoothing her hands over her hips, the pencil skirt settling into place.

Karen isn't sure why she feels like she's on a first date. Her and Frank...aren't like that, could never be that. It's what she tells herself whenever she thinks about him and the shadow of his family looms. They're the impetus, the reason, and to find an attraction and draw so close to him for the same exact reasons she can never act on it is a cruel joke.

Maybe it's that they've never known each other outside the violence. What do you talk about when you know what lies beneath? She runs through a few scenarios in her mind and everything sounds stupid. He likes dogs. She has a new penchant for dive bars she blames on Matt and Foggy. Ugh. It all sounds so normal, it doesn’t fit.

But even if nothing seems right in her head, she can’t wait to see him, and her heels click faster than usual on the sidewalk as she nears the old school Curtis said for her to meet them at.

A few vets, marked by their military-issue jackets pulled tight against the autumn chill, are leaving when she walks in. One holds the door for her and she gives a nod of thanks, climbing the stairs to wait outside the room, where she hears a voice - Curtis - ask for Frank to hang back a bit. Her hands fidget as the meeting continues to let out, a chorus of gruff goodbyes and ‘ooras.

When the voices die down to two, she walks into the room as softly as she can, but her heels ring on the linoleum and he looks up in alarm.

He rises with a start, the chair screeching on the old flooring. His glance at Curtis is accusatory, and Karen takes a step back, weight poised to leave.

“I can-" she doesn't finish the sentence, just nods at the doorway. This was a bad idea.

“No, no,” Frank’s voice is apologetic. He scrubs a hand over his face, through the hair he’s let grow out again. “Shit, Karen. I just,” he trails off, glances at Curtis again who lifts one brow in challenge.

Frank looks at her pleadingly, holding up a finger to ask for a minute and she nods, stepping just outside the doorway. She hears footsteps and Frank's rough voice, first in an unintelligible whisper, the tail of it becoming audible as his voice raises.

“...You better watch your spare legs, man. Gonna steal em all and replace them with pink ones. Rainbows on em. See what the boys think about that.”

Curtis’ response makes her smile, and she can almost see his nonchalant shrug. “Bring it, ladies love a man in touch with his feminine side.”

She's getting over the shock of Frank’s laugh when he appears in front of her, his eyes sweeping across her, studying the exits, coming back to rest on her face. “Saw your article last week,” he says, starting down the stairs and motioning for her to follow. “I liked it. It was a topic that won't get you shot,” he says, and she smiles. Her latest exposé on grocery store butcher counters had certainly been safe.

“That was the most boring article I've written yet. But thanks.”

He glances as her as he hits the push bar on the school doors, evening splaying its last rays of light across the entranceway.

“Coffee?” he asks and, at her nod grins and places his hand in the small of her back, an unconscious steering as they walk down the stairs, her heels clicking on the cement.

It’s weird. To walk with him instead of run. To have her heart beating at normal speed instead of almost tearing out of her chest. To feel safe not just because she's with him, but because the situation is. She wonders if he feels the same, looks up to find his eyes searching hers. Maybe he does.

She tamps down her nervousness as they enter the diner, the formica tables so similar to the ones in that diner not so long ago that it's hard not to react. His hand brushes low on her back again, perhaps because he feels it too, and she takes comfort in the gesture before sliding across from him in a booth.

“Your face looks much better this time,” she says, because she's never been one to dance around the issue.

He cocks a half grin at her, reaches for a ketchup-stained menu held up by a set of salt and pepper shakers. “Yeh. Suppose it does.” His eyes cloud for a moment and dart away, and she ducks her head down to try to meet his eyes again, trying to pull him back. He sees her and lets out a quick breath, eyes locked on her own. “Got no idea what I'm doing, Karen.”

The words echo between them as the waitress comes, pouring coffee at Frank’s nod and murmuring an ‘Ok, sweetie, you just tell me if you need anything’ at Karen’s head shake.

“None of us do,” Karen finally says.

“Not everyone's done what I've done.”

“And you just let your past own you?”

“No, that's not it. I mean,” Frank drums his fingers against his mug, “it’s more...who the hell am I? Who am I to sit here and talk to you in this diner in this city? I know I'm a weapon. Kill the bad guys. Wipe the slate clean. Got that shit down. So I go put on a suit and tie now? Pretend like that shit isn’t there?” He looks away, eyes trained on something outside the window that she can't really see.

It's more words in a row than she's ever heard from him and she's not sure how to respond. She reaches over and grabs his cup, takes a sip and makes a face at the bitterness. “Do you regret the things you've done?” She can tell he expected kindness instead of this directness, his eye twitches as he steals the cup back and watches her over the rim, biding for time.

“No.”

“Do you want to do it again?”

He gives a small huff of breath, mouth twisted in a sneer, and he turns it on her instead of answering the question. “What's your story, then? I know you've danced with the devil, it's in your face every time you look at me. Is that what this is? Some kinda rehab project, save Frank Castle.”

She knows he's baiting her but it still hurts, her voice clipped and angry in response. “if you want to push me away you'll have to try harder, Frank.”

He sniffs, cocks his head and squints his eyes to look at her close. “Yeah. Guess I do.”

Silence stretches out between them and she motions to the waitress, orders a cup of coffee and a B.L.T. He’ll have to be the one to leave. She listens to the low hum of the refrigerated pastry case, the bray of a laugh two tables down. Frank’s looking out the window again.

“I don't have answers for you,” she begins, his head snapping to attention as if he was waiting for her to break the silence, “I struggle with who I've...killed both directly and indirectly. But I do know that I don't condemn you, never could. I do know that I should,” she says with a smile, gives a small laugh. “But you've never been anything but honest about who you are, what you do. It’s a code I can't really disagree with. So,” she pauses as the waitress sets a plate in front of her, plays with one of the toothpicks spearing the bread. “So I'm left thinking that there's a truth in what you do, that it's something that I have to back up against rules instead of morality to even start thinking it's wrong.” Frank is unusually still. She's used to his little tics, the head dipping down, the eyes flicking over their surroundings, the slide of his tongue across his lips after a sip of joe. But he’s so focused on her it’s almost unnerving, and it makes her next words come out awkwardly, all in a rush.

“But the real truth is, when you were out there, when I wanted you to stop, it was never about those people. I was worried for you.” She drops the toothpick, reaches for her cup, but Frank’s hand grabs her wrist, turns her hand palm side up. They both stare at their hands, Frank's thumb swiping across her pulse point once before letting go, and when she looks up his face is unreadable and his gaze darts out the window again where the bright yellow of a passing cab reflects off the glass. It's like he was put on pause while she spoke, and now he’s back to life, all uncoiled energy.

“Karen-,” and oh god she hears it in his voice, the apology, so she stops him before the words can hurt her, a finger to his lips.

“Don’t.”

His lips part and they're soft on her fingers. His expression shifts to regret.

“Not that either,” she says and smiles, pulling her hand back. He shakes his head, grin stretched across his face, and her heart aches at the sweetness of it.

“Much better,” she says and picks up her sandwich, taking a comically large bite just to see that smile stay. This is how they start, she thinks, because they too need a new one.

An hour later and Karen scrapes the plate clean of cherry pie filling, to Frank’s wordless protest. The bill is paid and the waitress gives her a wink and thanks them in her rough smoker’s voice. The diner is empty now, the hour late on this weekday night, but she hadn't noticed the time, and neither had he. There’s a light rain falling now, the city streets a blur of diffused light, and he walks her home without them discussing, his long-legged gait slow so she can keep up. It would feel like a date except it’s not, but she's also not quite sure what it is.

At her door they pause awkwardly before she pulls him into her arms, her face against his neck, his head slotting over her shoulder, his hand and its slow slide through her hair enough to make her close her eyes. She knows he's not ready. She's not sure if she is either, but there's something spun between them that lies deep and she kisses him where his neck meets his shoulder as if acknowledging things to come. The yellow light from the outdoor bulb halos above them as she turns in his arms, and Frank looks like he wants to say something so she studies his face for a hint of what it could be. The light crackles, an errant moth, and instead of saying anything he tips his forehead to meet hers.

The ghost of a smile plays at both of their lips in unspoken recognition and they stay there for a few moments, breath mingling, close enough for each of them, for now.

#kastle #kastlenetwork #kastle fic #kastlelibrary #kastleff #lclrgsl #happy birthday!!!!!

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daydreaminghaven · 6 years

Text

I needed a rant

I'm just going to write this down because I don't know how else to deal with this at the moment. My roommate is an asshole, it's gotten to bad that at this point I'm literally on the verge of tears. She is inconsiderate and rude and I don't know what to do. Sometimes my gut just tells me to go fucking punch the shit out of her but I wont because I'm better than that. I know for a fact that she could never beat my ass and it's not like I'm scared of her it's just that I'm scared of losing this home. I don't want to move anymore and if I do result to violence I'll be out and who knows where I'll be next? The last thing I want or need is too be in another fucking group home which will be right where I'm headed if I lose this place. '

And what could make me come to all of this? When I first met my roommate I knew we were not going to become close friends it was like I could see the future. You know when you meet someone and you just feel their negative energy? Well it was like that with her. Nevertheless, being that I just came out of a hellish rehabilitation program it was a miracle that I somehow was given a foster home. Foster homes are very, very rare for someone my age- especially coming from someone who was currently in a rehab. All anyone wants are little kids, and as a matter of fact my foster parent even admits she wasn't going to take me because she herself only wanted young kids. The only reason she took me is because I have an interest in church, quote me.

If I had to go to a group home then so be it, but now that I'm here I don't want to lose what I have. The problem with group homes is that they occupy too many people. Just imagine what its like to be living with 5-9 teenage girls mixed in with 3 or 4 tired, angry under-payed, overworked staff members (that switch out 3 times a day) all under the same roof. It's not pretty. There's ALWAYS fights, there's ALWAYS drama, ALWAYS something weather it be someone running away, two or more girls not getting along or a staff member not doing their job, or overstepping boundaries; there is constant stress. All. The. Time.

For someone who likes solitude, quietness, this kind of environment is- it's just horrible. It's already bad enough but then mix in someone who can't handle that kind of lifestyle and it can worsen their mental health, it can lead to self harm, suicidal ideations or worse.

Once upon a time I used to be able to handle group homes, I just moved along when the drama happened, it was frustrating definitely (not just for me but for everyone), but it wasn't unbearable. But then I moved... And I moved again. And again. Then I started getting more fed up with it, then I started breaking down more easily, and self harmed, attempted suicide. I started to runaway, and use drugs... And every time I moved the staffs/therapists/supervisors seemed to care less and less and it was so frustrating. There were so many rules but so much unacceptable behavior slipping right under the rug!

And there was pretty much nothing you could do about it.

Then I got put in that rehabilitation and residential program which was some of the worst times in my life. It was like a bad group home to the max. You thought 9 teenage girls was bad? try 18-29. Together, all fucking day. No phones or internet, you had to be cut off- you couldn't even have a diary or pass notes without it needing to be checked everyday. You can bet there was fights and drama all the time, you couldn't leave the campus at all until months after you arrived. Not even mentioning that there was a strict schedule when to, sleep eat, shower, have mandatory groups that everyone hated. The staff in these places was even worse, virtually EVERYONE hated their job, and the staff in programs are allowed to put there hands on you if deemed necessary, and oh-fucking-boy did they. That power was abused way to fucking often but you want to try to run away? Straight to jail for 90 days just to get sent back and have to start all of your progress over from scratch... or possibly get sent to an even longer program.

These programs are technically 6 months but most people end up there for 8 to 9 months. You are given a set of 5 'levels' or 'phases' that you have to complete in order to get discharged from the program. Some kids are lucky and their insurance runs out and their parents can't pay to keep them there. I wasn't that lucky considering my parent is the state of fucking Florida. I'm grateful to be able to have good insurance and all but fucking hell that place was bad. Due to having to move to a switch different program 5 months after I was sent to my first program (over something that wasn't my fault, it had to due with medication issues which is a whole other story), I had to start all of my progress over and start the levels off from scratch. I spent 8 months in my second program making 13 months completely cut off from society (did I mention you weren't even allowed to watch the news?). That’s where I spent Christmas, Halloween, Mothers and Fathers day, even my birthday. I was discharged just two fucking days after my birthday. Just two. Anyways, the point is, I worked really, really hard to prove that I was responsible enough to get a foster home and I did. Even though my roommate is a fucking asswipe dealing with one girl is better than 9. At least I can kind of ignore her. But It's just so hard to act like it's not that bad she’s always

-touching and stealing my belongings -throwing actual garbage with bloody tampons in it over my ART SUPPLIES -always calling me disgusting and dirty when this bitches side of the closet -smells like fish -talking dirty to boys late at night (I don't want to hear about how you want to eat his ass. Stop it. Get some help.) -using my towel that I bathe with to clean the floor with BLEACH FUCKING BLEACH -USING MY LOAFERS AND WASH RAGS -plays loud angry rap music, or movies at full volume all night, usually until 2am, -or really early in the morning to wake me up WHEN SHE OWNS FUCKING HEADPHONES -Talks shit about me to everyone that comes through the door of this house (and loudly)

and I’m over here basically kissing her ass because anything is better than those fucking group homes. And I've tried to ask her to stop, or turn down her music, I've tried confronting her- and peacefully and respectfully but she either ignores me or gets violent. I've tried tried telling the foster parent, my therapist and no one is doing anything. I'm backed up into a corner. Like I said before, I'm not scared for my life, this bitch is like 5'3 (no offense to short people) but like I could kick her punk ass any day- and I would if I number 1.) wasn't trying to better myself and number 2.) cared about this home so fucking much. I just don't know what to do except pray and try to focus on other things. I wish I could just sleep in the living room. I keep breaking my headphones because I have to sleep with rain noises or something to drown out whatever she decides to play. Can you believe she has the audacity to wake me up just tell me to turn down my headphones when she tries to sleep? Like they aren’t even big headphones they are 6 dollar earbuds how loud can they be?! I do every single time though because I'm trying to 'stay blameless in Gods eyes' because I believe in karma and also if I didn't she would probably do something really petty like purposefully play loud music to wake me up even earlier or play it all night so I can't sleep.

It really sucks. I have to live with this person for 110 more days (and, yes, I have it marked on my calendar) but one day she'll be gone and I wont have to deal (or smell) this person again. So hopefully I'll have some more learned patience by then.

The whole reason for me even righting this is because yesterday she asked me to turn the light off in our room when I'm not using it (which is understandable, except you're never home anyways nor do you pay the bills) and of course when she came home the next day I made sure the light was off (did I mention the reason I'm not in the room when she comes home is because I avoid being in there when she is? My foster parent apparently thought that was important enough to report to my therapist like I have problems-But when I tell you whats actually going on you don't do anything about it so like...). Then today when came home I asked her to close the door when she goes in the room, while she was going to the room (because I can still hear whatever she plays from the living room). Guess what? She looked right at me, then walked to the room which is right across the living room and left the door wide open ON PURPOSE. Later on she said that basically it's not her job and that if I want it closed then I need to walk over and close it every time she leaves it open. It pissed me off so much that I just needed to write my feelings out because there isn't anything else I can do about it. Maybe when I'm older I'll look back on this and think 'wow look how strong you are now' and hopefully by then I'll be in a position where if someone is being an outright dick I can punch the shit out of them on the spot- I mean deal with them professionally.

just 110 more days Jasmine, you can do it. Do it for yourself girl do it for your boo thang

#what do i do #i need advice #advice

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arcticficialbanana · 7 years

Text

Wild World

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Word Count: 2,761

Warnings: Mental health issues, fluff, tiny angst

A/N: For the Titles Are Hard challenge, by @impala-dreamer If you don’t want spoilers...Don’t read the prompt until after, but I’ve combo’d it with this post from @writing-prompt-s. Since it has to be 3k or under I will probably have to make it a mini-series...as my readers know my usual runs around 6k or 9k.

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You tuck your arm under your head, pressing your face into your forearm. You grasp a handful of the back of your head in frustration, scratching your scalp beneath your hair. You place your other arm over your head, covering your ear with your bicep to drown out the tormented sounds of your roommate. This bed is so flat and thin that you can’t get comfortable. You tuck your face closer into the pillow, but it smells musty and like stale laundry detergent. Conceding to your restlessness you turn onto your back and stare at the grayish ceiling above the pale blue walls. Translucent moonlight seeps through the window and in it’s rays you can see dust swirling overhead. The metal bed frame across the room rattles with the shakes of it’s occupant. Poor soul, probably another nightmare. Maybe a late night chat would calm her down and one of you could get some form of sleep. You swing your legs out of bed and touch them to the floor. You observe the trembling form under the sheets and frown, wondering what’s brought her to this place. With a sigh you pull yourself up and slowly walk toward her bed. She is facing the wall and you’re not sure what the most gentle way to wake her is, but you don’t want her to keep suffering. Your hand reaches out toward her shoulder delicately, but you catch yourself. Didn’t you hear something about not waking a person in a nightmare? Was it a nightmare or a night terror? What was the difference again? Maybe it was sleep walking... As you wonder what would be the right thing to do, your roommate stirs in her bed. You make your decision and lean in toward her, but before you get too far she whips herself over to face you. She shrieks in terror at your darkened face in the night and pushes herself back into the wall.

“No, no, it’s ok. It’s me, Y/N,” you try to calm her, but every time you move closer she shrills louder. The lights snap on overhead and two nurses rush into the room, “Get back!” one yells at you and obediently you retreat to your side of the room. “I was only trying to help,” you shake as her screams vibrate through the room. They carry her away and shut the door in haste. A moment later a nurse cracks the door open and looks in on you. “We understand darling, don’t worry she will be just fine,” she sighs and walks halfway into the room, “It’s just, in a place like this, you can’t approach people like that.” She looks at you sympathetically and crosses her palms in front of her belly politely. Tears begin to well up in your eyes, “I was only-I was trying- I just wanted to-wanted to help her,” you stutter, fighting the whirling panic. The nurse shakes her head kindly, “Don’t be upset, my dear. I’ll give you helpful advice, as a rule keep your hands to yourself. You never know what kind of histories people have here. Abuse and what may be.” You reflect her nod and suck in a deep breath, “Okay.” you wipe your tears away and she bows slightly, “There, there, everything is well, I promise.” she says before spinning on her heel and walking out of the room.

The lights dim out much slower than they flipped on and you face the ceiling, watching the filament lose it’s glow.

“It’s my first week here.” You fold your hands in your lap, pausing to meditate on everything that’s brought you to this chair. You fiddle your thumbs and when someone makes a guttural throat noise you stop fidgeting and run your hands down your thighs to your knees, smoothing out your robe. “I have never had an episode before this month and I’m not sure what to say,” You raise your head and glance around the room, “I didn’t realize it could happen so suddenly. I thought you either had, erm,” you look at the faces in the circle and rephrase your thoughts in your head so that you don’t offend anyone, “mental issues, or you are….healthy.” You wince, hoping that this isn’t the wrong thing to say, but nobody reacts much to your insults. “Well, it’s not like I am insulting anyone here, because clearly I am here too.”

“You don’t need to be afraid to speak here.” A woman remarks as you continue to fumble your words.

“What brings you here?” She asks.

“Well,” You take a deep breath and close your eyes to recall a memory for you to describe, “I saw something that I can’t explain.” You scowl as you remember the flickering figure in your mind, “It was …well it wasn’t,” your throat is scratchy and you habitually touch your hand to your collarbone, “I don’t know why this is so difficult for me to get out.” Behind your eyelids you can see the form of a person in front of you, but they’re static and semitransparent.

A knot tightens in your stomach and you open your eyes to see some of your groupmates staring at you, or through you. Some of them aren’t paying attention, just sitting in their chairs focusing on something of their own.

You take a gulp and tell them, “I saw a ghost.”

Nobody says anything at first, but you feel conflicted saying it out loud, “I don’t know how to come to terms with it, because I know it wasn’t real, but whatever sort of hallucination it was-“

“You’re so clueless.” Someone in the circle scoffs and gets out of their chair dramatically.

The ringleader glares and shushes, “Don’t let anybody discourage you. Whatever you see is your truth. That’s why you came here to talk about it, right?”

You nod uncertainly but figure it’s something you’ll come to understand with time.

“I’m going to take a walk.” You say awkwardly to get out of the group, feeling very uncomfortable and looking for an excuse to be alone.

Some people in the group nod robotically and you stand up and bow gracelessly, unsure how to end this session.

Everybody ignores you as you walk out of the room and you keep your head down as you pass a few doctors or nurses or attendants. You haven’t bothered getting to know anybody. You aren’t sure the protocol for behavior in these circumstances. You feel completely normal. You don’t feel crazy, but at the same time you can’t explain why your head was making you see inexplicable things. Were you crazy, or were you having a mental breakdown? Nobody really interacts with one another here, but you follow around the groups of people as it seems like the schedule is very flexible. You came in earlier in the week and explained your situation, and everybody was very gracious and understanding. It doesn’t seem like there are very strict rules, and you kind of like that. Maybe a little bit more structure would be nice, but you weren’t sure what to expect when you checked yourself in. There is a certain amount of relief in the fact that you’re not tied down and force fed drugs in a straitjacket. Maybe that was a cartoonish idea of mental institutions, but you never had to think about it before. It seems more like a drug rehab facility; go, do whatever you want as long as you stay within the lines and talk it out.

Air swishes against your cheek and you turn to face an open arching frame leading outside. Following the path of cobblestones, you walk into an overgrown garden. You kneel down and observe the mismatched flowerbeds, growing into one another. Grass tickles your shins, desperately needing a shearing. You notice a patch of dandelions and grab them close to the root to pull them up out of the ground. Most of the root comes out and you tuck it into your robe pocket after breaking the heads off. Five or six dandelion heads roll around in your palms and you pinch them by the stem to make a fluffy bouquet of wishes. Your eyelids drooped down automatically and you hold your breath as you think of something you would like to wish for- Some clarity. You blow into your hands and most of the little seeds float away with the current of the air. A few remained in your hand, but you watched what floats away instead, following the path away from the garden with your eyes. You inhaled sharply with a gasp as a man walks through the tall grass toward you. You choked on a couple of dandelion seeds that made their way into your throat with your sudden inhale. Your hand grasps at your throat and a voice booms over you, “Are you okay?” You wave your free hand and turn away to spit out the offending obstruction. You cover your mouth in embarrassment and turn back to the man, blushing as you look up at his towering height.

“I’m fine.” You say meekly and he crouches down across from you.

“What are you doing here?” He asks and you look around the empty garden before meeting his eyes, “I just wanted to go for a walk.” You shrug.

“How far did you come for your walk?” he scrutinizes you, huddled in the flowerbed in your dirty clothes.

“Oh,” you say with an air of insecurity, turning away from him when you catch yourself staring at the speckles in his eyes, “Not very far,” you giggle, figuring that he is teasing you. “Why are you walking here?” He leans farther down to you and his hair fall in front of his face. You turn back to him, glancing over his clothing. He doesn’t look like a patient, but he doesn’t look like any of the workers either. “I was having a hard time dealing with …all of it I suppose.” You shrug and brush off dry dirt from your robe. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m Sam.” He says apprehensively and stretches his hand out to you. Hesitant to touch him, you are left unsure of what to do. You were told you weren’t really supposed to touch anybody, but he looked friendly and unafraid. “Oh, I’m Y/N.” you smile and decide to take his hand. It was calloused, but warm, and its large palm encompassed your entire hand in it. “That’s lovely, Y/N.” Sam smiles at you and offers out his other hand, “Can I help you up?”

You stare at his forearms, rippled with muscles up to the point where his sleeves are rolled up to the elbow. Half hypnotized you nod and he grips your shoulder, swooping you up with him as he stands. His chest is staring you in the face, or at least you feel as though it is, since the broad frame is captivating your field of vision. He laughs a hearty laugh and you feel tingles in your cheeks, probably tinging a pale pink right now. You step back from him and can’t help but get captivated by his shining smile. Relaxing a little you breath relief, “Thank you.” You spin around, expecting that he is heading inside and begin to walk back to the archway.

“Wait, Y/N!” he steps toward you, but recoils back instantly.

You turn and furrow your brow in confusion, “Sam?”

“You shouldn’t go in there,” Sam tenses up, making you anxious. You spin around to make sure nobody was coming toward you, but you only saw someone far down the hall, not paying attention this way. “What?” you turn back and blink at him, troubled by his tone, but very puzzled. He points to the building and shakes his head at you. “You shouldn’t be here,” he indicates, making you laugh nervously. You walk back toward him, so the loud talking doesn’t attract the attention of any of the nurses. “What do you mean?” you say in a hushed voice, wondering if there are rumors you should know about. “This isn’t the kind of place for you to be hanging out, Y/N.” Sam hunches so that he is closer to your level. “Hanging out? I’m not hanging out, Sam.” You screw up your face wondering if he doesn’t understand that you are a patient. “I need help, Sam.” You assert to him, trying to make it clear why you are here.

“Okay, I can help you. Just tell me what’s wrong,” Sam very gently proposes.

Baffled, you tilt your head at him, “No, it’s okay Sam, that’s why I’m here.”

“Listen, Y/N,” Sam apprehensively steps toward you and casually takes your hand, “I’m not sure what kind of closure you are looking for, but this isn’t a safe place for you. Your mind races, trying to make sense of what he is saying, but suddenly you think you might have figured out what is going on. Sam must be a patient here too. “Oh, man.” You say as you smack your hand to your face, feeling duped by his charming appearance. Of course not all crazy people look …crazy. You don’t look crazy, or at least you don’t think.

“Y/N,” Sam says and puts his arm around your shoulder, “I understand that you are going through something, but this place is very haunted.” He tries to lead you away from the building, but you jerk out of his grasp. “That isn’t funny.” You become very uneasy and cross your arms over your chest defensively, “Is this something the doctors told you to do?” You wonder if this is some sort of immersion therapy, or perhaps a test by the nurses to see how much progress you’ve made. Are you supposed to make progress this soon? A week isn’t that long, shouldn’t they give you more time before something like this? Sam slants his head trying to understand you but doesn’t speak right away, and his mouth forms a questioning circle. “No, you can tell them that I haven’t seen anything.” You snap at him, feeling bad that he gets your backlash, but you are feeling very on edge right now. Sam’s eyes shift around, but he finally forms the words to say “Y/N, no, I don’t think you understand,” Either Sam is really good at his assignment, or maybe you were right in the first place, and he also sees ghosts. “Y/N, you could get really hurt here.” Sam stands up straight, flustered with your lack of cooperation. “Right now, I think the only person that can hurt me here is you.” You step backwards, sure to keep your eye on him as you retreat to safety. “DON’T!” Sam shouts at you, but you throw your hands in front of yourself, “Don’t come any closer!” you shake your head furiously, “I’ll scream!” “This is serious!” Sam beckons to you, worry written across his face, “You don’t know what those spirits can do to you.” He pleads with his desperate eyes. You stop walking backward and stomp on the ground forcefully.

“That’s enough!” you squeeze your eyes shut, losing control of your voice, “GHOSTS AREN’T REAL!” your eyes begin to sting and you whirl toward the arches and run back to your room.

Sam closes the door to the motel room behind him and rubs the bridge of his nose in exasperation. He sighs and goes to tell his brother his findings of the institution.

“Dean?” Sam calls out when he finds the room empty.

A man swings open the bathroom door and walks out with a toothbrush gripped in his hand, “Did you scope it out? Gather any important information there?”

Dean leaves the door open and hovers over the bathroom sink, running water over the bristles. Sam falls into an armchair and pulls out his notepad.

“Actually, yeah,” he taps his notepad to his forehead and thinks about how to explain his encounter. Dean swishes the brush in his mouth and looks curiously over at his brother. He mumbles something through a mouth full of paste sounding like, “What’ve you got?”

“Someone was there,” Sam starts, chuckling at Dean’s peculiar expression, “Alive!” Sam says in surprise of his own.

Dean spits into the sink and rinses out his mouth before toweling off his hands and shouting back at Sam, “Oh yeah? What were they doing there?”

“I think she was staying there?” He says incredulously.

“What?” Dean bursts into the room, “Did she know that the place has been closed for 30 years?”

#dreamer's title challenge #Sam x reader #Samxreader #SUPERNATURAL AU #Supernatural Fiction #supernatural imagine #Supernatural #Sam Imagine #Sam Winchester Imagine #Sam Fiction #Sam AU #Sam Winchester #Impala Dreamer #Impala-Dreamer #Supernatural Challenge #Writing Prompts #Challenge

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