#and you thought i meant it platonically

[fikrell]

"Your love life is just a series of fanfiction tropes" I tell him, and then proceed to Friends to Lovers 300k Slow Burn with Mutual Pining, Obliviousness, and LGBTQ Themes

[flickeringflame216]

actually the princess bride had it wrong. true love does happen every day because love is a constant choice. You fall in love with someone and then you wake up every day and choose to love them again, still, forever.

[can-a-tuna-fish]

I have something to say about boyf riends being queer platonic but the world isn’t ready

[jellyfish-grave]

Made a small comic based on this post by @theouterwilds this morning. Hehe

[starflungwaddledee]

Bandee and Starstruck 🎀💖

starting off my february starstruck dee ship-a-ganza with the big one. they do seem like... the obvious answer, huh...?

they have far and away the most development together and the strongest personal relationship, both in what i've posted, and in her story overall! would kill or die for each other in a heartbeat. i would be absolutely lying if i said i'd never thought about it, but i'm not 100% convinced my thoughts lead me to romance specifically...

they're already pretty insane about each other! starstruck in particular is madly in love with bandee in every way it's possible to be. loves him the way he loves kirby, i think (pretty sure he does not know this. might be shocked to learn it.)

however she's daft as bricks, so he'd have to initiate, and i can't really imagine anything in their relationship would change.... so he'd have to mostly want The Title or the Performance one way or another, and i'm not super sure he would!

[rambling-prince-thoughts]

i got to thinking after yesterday’s post (linked here if you haven’t read it) about svs and decided to talk a little more about patton and logan’s relationship in specific contexts throughout the series.

as thomas explained to us in a behind-the-scenes video, logan and patton’s names were derived from logos and pathos, both of which are a form of appeal in persuasion. logos pertains to logical fact and reasoning and pathos pertains to emotion. very in-line which logic and morality, aka logan and patton.

so in essence, they’re opposites. we see this in one of the earliest sanders sides videos— THE MIND vs THE HEART— where logan and patton have differing opinions on the same matter, and they tend to cause thomas a great deal of confusion and anxiety when he tries to make a decision regarding those matters.

it’s the question that everyone often gets asked: do you listen to your mind more, or your heart?

however, one thing that stays consistent throughout the series is that patton, as the moral compass, is the most often listened to. thomas relies heavily on his emotions to get things done, specifically as seen in svs and svs redux. but patton also seems to know when something is missing, and encourages thomas to listen to the other sides.

an example of this would be “Accepting Anxiety” where patton calls out roman and logan for not realising that virgil’s absence is the cause of thomas’ current state of mind.

like i mentioned in my previous post, patton is usually the one to ask for logan’s input, and often needs logan to explain the things that he can’t put into words. there are lots of examples of this in LNTAO, where patton and logan are able to understand each other’s points of view and put them into easier terms.

i also have to mention this little moment of patton waving excitedly when logan pops up— it’s clear that patton does value logan both as a person and as one of thomas’ sides, and that he’s also important.

first is the part where thomas figures out that he’s stuck in a loop, but he can’t quite understand why. the rest of the sides are unable to provide an answer, until patton chimes in with his own explanation, which despite being confusing, is the only explanation that anyone had been able to think of. patton is unable to elaborate because as he says, “words can be tough”.

but logan is able to pick up on what patton meant and provide a more clear understanding. he also finds that patton is correct, and it was an ingenious solution.

he holds back his admiration, possibly because of his reputation as “unfeeling” and also not wanting to admit that someone else made a valid point. even less so that the person who made that valid point was patton, who usually was silly and lighthearted but who thomas listened to most, too.

in fact, he disregards patton’s comment of “puppets!” simply because he finds it ridiculous and unlike roman who immediately backtracks on his skepticism (which is a whole other post), he stays unwavering on his opinion of patton’s suggestion.

when logan doesn’t agree with everyone else turning into puppets, patton is the first to try and convince him by telling him that they need him there.

as logic, it’s logan who prioritises learning, and patton knows this. he also knows how much logan likes to teach others about things, so he appeals to that emotion to persuade logan to stay. he doesn’t even insist on logan changing into a puppet, he just asks that logan stays for the entire conversation.

he even backs logan up when logan and roman are fighting about the usage of “figuratively”, by telling roman not to assume which logan thanks him for.

when logan finally snaps and throw the paper ball at roman, it labels him as the problem, as he instigated physical violence against roman (even though roman was egging him on). so logan decides that he needs to leave, similar to how he did in “Moving On”. at this, patton finally raises his voice too, telling logan that he needs to stay and they can’t have the conversation without him, he’s part of the sides too.

when thomas agrees to hear logan out, patton agrees too, once again asking logan for his thoughts on the matter. he seems to be diffusing the situation as best as he can, and that means allowing everyone to speak once and be listened to.

logan refers back to the point that patton made, and acknowledges it as something that patton came up with instead of simply saying that there was a point made and listing it out. he could have easily said that it goes back to a point they’d established earlier, but even though he hid his admiration, he’s still giving patton credit where credit’s due.

another interesting thing: when logan insists that he’s not a joke, that he can’t be seen as such, the camera pans to patton and you can see his reaction through the puppet face. you can imagine what patton must be thinking right now as he puts the pieces together.

finally, during the puzzle song, logan is first to object and wants to get back to discussing things seriously without grasping that that’s what they’re doing, just not in the way he’s used to. once again, patton calls out to him, pleading with him to understand. he’s the only one making such a genuine effort to have logan be part of what they’re doing since he thinks that it might really benefit thomas.

so at the end, when everything is sorted out, patton is relieved that everyone has gotten along and that logan seems to be on par with the situation.

it’s clear that patton listens to logan the most out of all the other sides, and that logan expects patton to listen to him and heed his words. that’s why he was so shocked during the events of svs when he thought that patton had betrayed him by intentionally keeping him out of the courtroom scenario. patton’s comments are usually also understood best by logan, who clarifies them into more logical points for the others.

they’re meant to work together as a team. one cannot function without the other, otherwise thomas will be at risk to making entirely rational choices and forget to have empathy, or at risk to making choices on emotion alone and burning himself out.

that’s it for this post! join me again next time where i discuss patton’s character and how he’s trying really hard, but also failing intensely.

[morphestic]

dazai and oda are a tragic story with unrequited love and the fandom is reading it with their eyes closed.

[iicomet]

 A little troublemaker runs away from the chases of his older sect brother, a bottle of wine dropping from his arms as he spins and avoids the fallen soldier, giggling loudly as he runs. His face holds a cheeky grin when he sees his older sect brother chasing after him with a broom, picking up the bottle as he did.

  He laughs. A sound so carefree and filled with mischievous delight.

  Blankets of snow covered the grounds of the sect, the cold making him huff out breaths of cloudy air, despite his energized steps. He could run ten more laps and more, just to escape from his sahyung and enjoy the spoils of his gluttonous greed in delight.

  A daily occurrence in Mount Hua, a daily occurrence between sect brothers.

  “Ah– There you are.”

  He hears, before he is grabbed by the back of his collar like a cat and held in the air, his bottle dropping immediately in alarm. He looks at his perpetrator, a nervous chuckle coming out of him as they look at him with an amused, yet confused look.

  “...Senior.”

  He calls out, hoping to sound as gullible and innocent as possible, as if he wasn’t laughing internally at his sahyung, as if he didn’t just steal bottles of wine to drink in a tree somewhere in the sect, as if he wasn’t planning to skip his training again. They stared at him, opening their mouth to speak before they were interrupted by another voice, the voice of his sahyung who had chased him across the sect grounds.

  “Chung Myung! Ah, thanks for catching him, senior. He stole those bottles of wine again.”

  They smiled, nodding at their junior before turning their gaze towards Chung Myung, this time more disappointed and strict. He could feel shivers up his spine at that stare, any words immediately disappearing at the tip of his tongue. He had no way of escaping this time, so he had no choice but to bow his head down and pout, defeated by his senior.

  “...I’m sorry…”

  They shook their head, letting him down with a gentle pat and picked up the bottles, leaving the two sect brothers alone. He watched them leave, their figure growing smaller at the distance, their footsteps resounding across the silent grounds with each gentle step. A back he has grown used to seeing, a shadow he wished to chase after. No matter what he did, it seems like he could never ever catch up to them, their nimble movements too fast for a young boy like him.

   A wishful thought remains in his mind as he turns around, following his sahyung obediently. 

  ‘One day, you won't be able to catch me, senior.’

[walnutcookie]

ive had an. Intersting relationship with my aromanticism honestly.

[monsterroonio]

omfg. i was writing up a reblog to that gender related post and i had to stop in my tracks at what you said abt me being a cat and what type of cat i am. kvjnsknjd

and why is that description so accurate??? Like especially with my haphephobia, I gotta be super comfortable with someone to want physical contact, but I'm also touch starved, so once I'm comfortable with it, I want a lot of it ksjdnvkjksdvjb

like.. o//o) how you described me as a cat is so cute hhhh i blush. but also like, how did u read me so well??

I got u in my sights bro 👁👁

I guess I just pick up on the vibes super fast, I try to understand people really well, it makes my brain happy :)

But also, if I wasn't confident in it I wouldn't have done it so for some reason I was just like... yeah. This makes sense. This is didderd.

(Also I ranted a little on my reblog of it kind of explaining how I related to that but I was like.... hmm... we can save that for another post lol glad you also felt the need to write more about it too :) )

[zero-braincells-left]

for todays shitpost you get a fun performance trio incorrect quote, brought to you by a conversation I had w my friend

Preston: so,, since you and Nerris are married now, why was I not invited to the wedding??

Harrison: idk, I wasn't invited either :/

[skeletalheartattack]

I’m sorry to hear you haven’t received anon love often, you’re a very cool person and I love seeing you on my dash! SKELETON

now that im thinking about it, i feel like the post in reference may've just meant like... compliments or positive remarks. what i initially took the poll as was ''anon crushes'' and responded as such. but regardless that was sweet of you to think anon, thank you :)

[peridots-pixiwolf]

[Start ID. A green-toned drawing of two characters from an original universe, shown from the shoulders up. It's framed as though they're taking a selfie. On the left is Heathrow, a human with dark skin, long hair, a good number of facial scars, and two painted lines below each eye. He wears something akin to a green hoodie, with fluffy plant matter sewn into the back of the hood. On the right is Crassie, a half elf, which in this universe entails long pointed ears, a pair of short pale horns, a slightly rabbit-like nose and markings under her eyes. Her skin is olive-toned, sporting a couple distinct scars on her face and hand, and she's wearing what is essentially a bush and spiked glovelets. Both of them are smiling, Crassie a little bit wide-eyed and Heathrow with a fond expression. The background's a saturated green with the text "1 YEAR!". End ID]

A redraw-in-spirit of the post from last year's Feb 16 that introduced these two to my blog. It's their birthday :]

[patronsaint-ofthedenial]

I don't like the term "platonic love" or "platonic attraction" mainly cause in my language we use that term for when there is romantic feelings involved but it's either unrequited or it's not acted upon, and also because we have separate words for just love in general and romantic love, but also like bro. I just love my friends it's not that complicated

[bi-demon-ium]

37 72

falling asleep together/sharing a bed + hiding face in neck/shoulders (nicholas/milligan) (ao3.)

All but collapsing in a shitty motel room was just the sort of way to end the week they’d been having.

Mr. Benedict had gotten a tip from his shrinking network of contacts about possible information on a company that worked out of Harbor Island—but they were based a city away, and so they had to travel.

It had been simple enough from there—information-gathering, a bit of light infiltration, but nothing dangerous, right?

And then, naturally, everything had gone horribly wrong.

They’d gotten out safely—if barely—but Milligan had had a worryingly close call with a rather large group of foes, and Mr. Benedict was certainly hiding bruises.

(He was actually concerningly good at hiding injuries, but couldn’t help the occasional wince, nor the conspicuous way he tugged his sleeves down to cover his wrists.)

The motel was far enough away that it was unlikely they had to worry about pursuers, but it was also, unfortunately, in the opposite direction of the house. They had another long journey ahead of them tomorrow.

But that was tomorrow. For now, it was over. They could rest.

The room was… not exactly amazing.

There were two beds, dingy but decently sized. It was small, but fairly clean. There was a small bathroom, a single closet, and a little fridge.

Well, both of them had slept in worse places. Besides. It wasn’t a prison cell or the trunk of a car. It would do.

They were both so exhausted and had little supplies at the moment, so it was really just a matter of stripping down a few layers—Nicholas had taken off his shoes and his blazer (now disheveled and smudged and with a hole in it) and undone a few buttons on his shirt, and Milligan had similarly removed his vest and shoes—and collapsing on their respective beds.

It was dark, and quiet.

They sat in silence staring at the ceiling.

Neither of them were really sleeping, despite the exhaustion. Milligan found he was still achy, and restless, and unable to stop thinking about—well. everything.

The mission (Nicholas’s frightened eyes when he’d been surrounded and nearly dragged away, how he’d gone limp—and the men surrounding Milligan, too, fighting and fighting and nearly being overwhelmed, nearly losing everything) and old, old wounds (drowning, drowning, cold water and his leg going numb, falling from a great height, feeling helpless and lost as something he needs to save, to protect, is just out of reach, the feeling of something important slipping through his fingers and from his mind like fine sand, of animals and moss and dirt, of yelling and thrown garbage and cold cruelty—) and the memories blend together until he’s just—

Lying there. Staring at the ceiling. Unable to sleep.

He tries to distract himself, but can’t. He feels cold. And, despite the fact he can hear Mr. Benedict’s breathing—quiet and even, although not deep—he feels alone.

(The memories blend together until he’s drowning and falling and frightened eyes swim out of view, someone he’s failed to save, he reaches for them but his hands grasp nothing, his arms close around nothing but cold water, rough hands and the bite of an eel and men surround him, cold metal pressed to his skull, he hears Nicholas cry out his name—)

He feels weak, for letting this affect him. He wants to—he wants to feel warm, to know Nicholas, at least, is safe, that they’re both safe and he is here, here, not there.

Abruptly, he realizes what, exactly, he’s wishing for. He wants to hold him, or perhaps be held, or—just to be close to another person. To Mr. Benedict in particular, who was safe and okay and only several feet away but his brain refused to believe it.

It’s. Weird, right? It’s probably weird?

…but then, it had been a long, bad day. They were both tense and tired and still shaken—a little frightened, even—and. well. both of them have always found touch grounding.

(Milligan discovered it early on, during a particularly bad nightmare, one late night dozing off in the study. He only calmed when Nicholas’s hands—shaking as they frantically and uncertainly hovered—gripped his shoulders, and then, upon realizing, then cupped his face.

Nicholas, on the other hand, had known for a very long time. He just never mentioned it. Milligan discovered this, too, upon noticing that he utterly melted in a rather impulsive hug.)

It would be grounding. And he’s exhausted and they have a long journey ahead tomorrow and Milligan will most likely need to drive and he has to rest first.

And—somehow, Milligan doesn’t think Mr. Benedict would mind. He certainly wasn’t the judgmental type.

(He’s awake, too. Milligan can tell by how he quietly stirs, over and over, trying not to make noise but clearly restless.)

…he shouldn’t. He probably shouldn’t.

(Cold, cold water. Rough hands, fists. Frightened eyes. A bite to the leg.)

He needs to sleep. To get them both home safely.

(Moss, dirt. The squeaking of rats. Disdain, yelling, disbelief. Fear.)

It takes him a little while to work up the courage.

Just say it. Just say it.

“Mr. Benedict,” Milligan says into the darkness, quiet, in case he really isn’t awake, but it’s only a moment before he hears Mr. Benedict’s soft voice answer, not even altogether that sleepy.

“…yes?”

Milligan realizes that there is no way to ask that isn’t extremely awkward, but it’s too late to back out, and anyway, he’s—he’s so tired. He’s exhausted, and Nicholas is right there, barely even out of reach, and Milligan just wants to rest. He wants to remember that they’re both safe and whole and warm, and that no one is drowning.

“…would you.” he pauses, thinking of any better way to phrase this, but nothing comes to mind, “…would it be more comfortable if. we were. together?”

There’s a beat of silence. Mr. Benedict’s surprise is almost audible.

“Neither of us are sleeping well,” Milligan says lamely. “I…”

And then Nicholas says, sounding very quiet and like he’s hunched in on himself, “You don’t—I wouldn’t want you to make yourself uncomfortable on my behalf.”

Milligan blinks. “…what?”

Nicholas sounds, if anything, even more uncomfortable. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to…” He’s squirming; Milligan can hear the covers rustling.

Millian stills. After a moment he says, with some amount of realization in his tone, “You… want physical reassurance?”

Another beat.

“…I have lasted a long time without,” Nicholas says finally, which is extremely depressing.

(What he was intending to get across was, so clearly, I don’t need it, and am fine. What he was getting across was so clearly I need it very badly.)

“Nicholas,” says Milligan at last, after processing that for a moment, and he thinks he’s startled Nicholas for a second time that night. “I was not asking for you.”

“…oh,” says Nicholas, and he sounds very small indeed.

“But I am glad, then,” Milligan says, “If. it helps.”

“…oh,” says Nicholas again.

There’s a moment of silence, then shuffling as he sits up. “Then. ah. yes, yes, I wouldn’t… yes. Shall I…?”

Milligan silently lifts the covers in answer.

He shuffles out of the bed—barefoot—then.

Nicholas, very hesitantly, settles next to Milligan in the bed. Milligan pulls the covers over them.

They’re fully clothed, and—perhaps it should be awkward. No, it really should be awkward.

But Milligan wraps an arm around him and pulls him closer, and Nicholas all but melts into his side with a little content sigh, turning over to bury his face in the juncture of Milligan’s neck and shoulder.

Milligan can feel the tip of his nose pressed to his collarbone. He relaxes into Milligan’s chest, tension bleeding from his body remarkably fast.

Milligan, too, can’t help but relax. He feels much warmer now.

"Thank you," says Milligan softly into the darkness.

Nicholas doesn't open his eyes. "I think we've established that this is quite mutually beneficial," he says wryly. But after a moment he says, far more quietly, "...but you're welcome."

(Always, he thinks, but doesn't say. You're always welcome.)

Milligan stares up at the ceiling still, feeling Nicholas’s breathing, the warmth of him pressed close. He’s relaxed, no longer shifting restlessly, instead lying slumped against Milligan almost bonelessly. Not asleep, yet, but clearly much closer to it even after what must be only a minute.

He’s safe. Safe and sound and whole. Both of them are.

The physical reminder—both of where they are (safe, in a small, dingy motel room, and together, far from water or cliffs or roves of people intent on harming them)and the fact that they’re both quite safe (Nicholas is fine, not dead or drowned, Milligan escaped that place and those waters and has a home, now)—it’s enough to leech away the remaining tension from Milligan, too.

Even the awkwardness couldn’t survive long: it’s too comfortable, and warm, and safe. Nicholas fits under his arm and pressed close, hiding his face in Milligan’s shoulder, like he belongs there. One arm, slowly—not carefully, but more as if not realizing, like unconsciously hugging a pillow—drapes itself around Milligan’s waist, too, and Nicholas shifts just a little to curl closer.

He's already half asleep, which isn’t common for him. Rather ironically, he never seemed to sleep well, or at least, not for long. But now his breathing was already getting deeper, even and slow.

Milligan lets his hand drift up to gently bury his fingers in Nicholas’s curls, dragging his fingertips up along his scalp. He hums a little, tilting his head into the touch, and Milligan closes his eyes. He runs a hand through Nicholas’s hair.

Holding him, being held in return.

It’s warm.

.

(They wake in the morning tangled up together and close. Neither of them have ever slept so deeply, and in fact, end up oversleeping past when they’d planned to leave.)

.

(When Nicholas wakes, warm, an arm around him, holding someone close and being held, it feels like a dream, hazy and unreal. He doesn’t want to wake up, to extract himself from Milligan’s arms and untangle themselves. So he drifts off again. Surely it can wait?)

(He’s never slept so long, or so without nightmares. He vaguely recalls—the memory is fuzzy and warm—the phantom feeling of hands in his hair.)

.

(They don’t really talk about it the next day, or afterwards. But the next time everything goes so horribly wrong, Milligan silently offers Nicholas a place next to him in bed, and Nicholas goes without thinking.)

[astrxealis]

started rereading the pjo series the other day actually wawawa still my favorite fr it means the world to me :(( but yeah also! rewatched big hero 6 and ngl it probably really is my favorite movie for many personal reasons hehe AND THEN also watched the first part of hamilton on tv w my parents they loved it hehehe