#another one even further back when i talked about my horrible relationship with my family and wanting to move out but unable

[autisticlee]

I hate when I tell people that something they tell me to do/try doesn't work for me, I tried it and it didn't work, it won't work for me because it doesn't consider my particular circumstances, i'm unable to do it because X reason, or i'm uncomfortable doing something, and their response is that i'm ~not even trying! just giving up! making excuses! complaining too much! being negative! ignoring their advice! dismissing them when they're just trying to help!~

why don't you listen to me????? if you truly want to help, you will listen to me, consider my circumstances, needs, boundaries, etc, and not make it all about YOU. especially when I don't even want advice and just want support/comfort.

[strrynigghts]

unexpected news

— könig x fem!preg!reader

— cw/tw: pregnant reader, accidental baby, potential typos, 3am writing, babies, established early relationship, reader and könig don’t live together, illusion to house!wife reader though she has a job, fluff(?), english to german google translate, so I’m sorry if it’s not perfect! lmk if I’ve missed any!

— summary: y/n is pregnant with königs baby, and he finds out

— an: I apologise for my long absence! I’ve been on and off tumblr for a few weeks now. just have been busy and had major writing block unfortunately. I am officially moved into my new home, and my pets are a lot sometimes, especially with two jobs. I’ve been focusing more on life, rather than tumblr, hence another reason why I’ve been gone. this idea came to me when my bf and I talked about how many kids we’d prefer XD enjoy lovies :3

it was honestly an accident. you and könig got a little too into it one night, and the way you wrapped around him oh so tight, ugh. he couldn’t help it, ripping off his condom to stuff his seed deep in you, mumbling, “ich möchte, dass du die mutter meiner kinder bist, maus. bitte lass mich in dir kommen,” in german as he came inside, your eyes rolled back so far into your skull you couldn’t even comprehend what happened until you felt sick a few days later.

you’ve called out of work for the past week, telling your boss you have a bad case of the flu. but the pregnancy test in your hand had said otherwise. you were in fact pregnant, and you couldn’t help but slouch against the door to your bathroom, tears streaming down your face as you started wallowing in what only you could describe as self pity.

könig, ever the gentleman, bright you soups everyday up until he had a mission. but you wouldn’t answer the door, or his calls. you couldn’t face him. he was in the military for gods sake! he couldn’t care for a baby, and honestly, neither could you. your apartment was falling apart at the seams more or less, and you honestly felt terrible.

but it was on the second week, you decided to face könig and his coworkers. after a mission that went horribly wrong, you wanted to invite him and his team over. you made them their favourite foods, and even set up the table while they were on their way over. as königs girl, you honestly didn’t mind cooking for him, or his team. they were like his family, and you made sure your apartment provided them comfort when they couldn’t feel comfortable in their own homes.

when they arrived, könig was the first to greet you. “hello my maus,” he said softly, kissing you on the cheek before stepping further into your home, everyone else following behind him. they all sat and ate, while you messed with the food on your plate, your appetite not so much in the moment. you felt sick, so you excused yourself and dashed for the bathroom, bending over the toilet. “oh my love, are you okay? did the soup not help you? you’re still sick from before I left for the mission?” könig spoke softly, grabbing your hair so it was out of the way.

you kept lurching over the toilet, unaware that königs eyes locked onto the pregnancy test that sat semi hidden under a wad of toilet paper, his breath hitching as he glanced between you and the test.

“you’re pregnant?”

you whined, looking at him with teary eyes and a red face, nodding subtly. “I was going to tell you I swear! just wasn’t sure how you’d react. wanted to tell you when the time was right, könig.” sighing, you stood up, flushing the toilet as you looked at him as he eyed you.

in a flash, he pulled you into his chest, hugging you tightly. “I’m going to be a dad!” he laughed softly, grabbing your hand and pulling you back towards the team, shouting, “she’s pregnant! I’m going to be a dad!” they all smiled and clapped for him and you, saying their congratulations and whatnots.

you weren’t sure how’d this play out, but you were ready to go down this lane and see where it takes you, so long as könig remained by your side, and his team on the other, lending a supporting hand to you both when needed.

© 2024 strrynigghts | please don't copy, translate, or repost any of my works. reblogs and likes are encouraged however.

image credit here

[thenightfolknetwork]

There's a bit of a taboo amongst my genus. I mean, I can't know for sure about the whole population, but certainly in my family there are rules about what is and isn't appropriate to do when we exercise temporal fluidity. And that's for good reason--I get that. You can't just go about changing the tides of war because you feel like showing off your historical foreknowledge. Fine.

Recently, though, I've been spending a lot of my time in one particular period--just about a half-decade on the other side of 0 AD. It's been great! I'm a bit of a Classicist, and a Latinist at that, so obviously there's plenty for me to do in Rome. The food is good, the literature is fascinating, and the people--well, I've certainly met some people. Specifically, there's this one guy. He's older, for sure, but we're both adults and happy with what we have. It's hardly an exclusive relationship, so we don't get bored with stagnation, and not to brag, but his achievements are nothing to scoff at. In fact, not too long ago he put down the remnants of a veritable civil war over in Hispania. My interest in this period has been primarily academic in the past, but I feel like he and I really get each other. I know how he takes his wine and his sense of humor and how he feels about his family. I care about him.

But here's the thing: I know he dies. Soon. And quite violently. I've just gotten back to the twenty-first century recently for a family reunion, so of course "soon" is relative, but back in Rome there isn't much time left. I haven't spoken about this to my family. I know what they'd say. I should just let it happen.

Although, I mean, should I really? Not to speak ill of the dead or anything, but I know for a fact Great-Grandma Margaret wasn't as rule-abiding as my mother likes to think--it's hardly a secret where (more accurately, when) she met Great-Nana Bonny. And, plus, lots of historical scholarship on the subject says, if my Roman friend hadn't died when he had, it probably would've happened sooner or later in a similar manner anyway (his approval ratings are not so high as of late). So is it really an interference if I warn him just this once? I mean, if he dies in another incident somewhere down the line--one of which I have no previous knowledge--then, fine, he dies. This isn't about preventing his death entirely. I understand that, in many ways, he is already dead. But I feel I would be a horrible companion if I didn't at least give him a heads-up. Just a nudge, you know? It's a politically unstable time back in the BC's. The line between this temporal reality and the other is so thin, and the difference is so small. Would my "interference" be so bad?

[Note: The sender later clarified that their letter ought to read "half century on the other side of 0 AD" where it here reads "half decade".]

I'm afraid I can't give you the kind of answer you seem to be seeking here, reader. While I am perfectly happy to help you talk through you moral quandaries, I must draw the line at making your decisions for you. You, and you alone, must discern for yourself whether or not such an act aligns with your own personal, moral code.

If an outside perspective will help, I will say that I'm not sure I entirely agree with your assessment of the circumstances here. I believe I have enough historical knowledge to infer which figure in history you're speaking about, which is, in itself, a concern.

It is a fact of existence that we shape the world around us. Even the quietest, most innocuous life casts its shadow. It is a fact to be embraced and celebrated – there is simply no such thing as an insignificant life. But neither is anything served by pretending that certain figures do not cast rather longer shadows than others.

It is one thing to consider fudging a timeline or two for the sake of someone whose impact reaches no further than their own village, or even their own country. It is quite another to speak of altering the timeline of a person whose existence left ripples across the surface of a significant portion of the globe!

I also don't necessarily agree with your assessment that your interference would not change anything very dramatically. Your friend's “approval rating” may not be great, but I am not at all sure it is universally accepted among historians that either his demise nor the manner in which he met his fate were inevitable.

Finally, you must consider the old paradox faced by every time traveller at some stage or another. You are an actor in this historical period, casting a shadow of your own, and you have no more idea than anyone else how that shadow may fall.

How do you know your warning might not precipitate the event itself? Alternatively, how can you be sure your warning is not already part and parcel of our historical reality? There is just such a warning made in most of the accounts I know, after all – if I am thinking of the right person, of course.

I cannot make this decision for you, reader. I cannot tell you what the right answer is, or even reassure you that there is a right answer. All I can do is to encourage you to think carefully about the risks involved, weigh them against your own moral judgement, and make sure that, whatever your choice, it's one you can live with. At the end of the day, that's all any of us can do.

[For more creaturely advice, check out Monstrous Agonies on your podcast platform of choice, or visit monstrousproductions.org for more info]

[dreamcatcher2113]

The Dragon Dance

Summary: What if Rhaenyra had another child? What if Rhaenyra had a daughter with white hair and purple eyes? What if she was betrothed to Aemond as an alliance with Greens? 

You are the daughter of Rhaenyra Targaryen, unlike your brothers you have white hair and purple eyes. You are the twin sister of Jacaerys. You were close with Aemond when you were kids, you two attached to the hip. Ten years later after your family left to Dragonstone, your family reunites with the Greens. You see a familiar face, Aemond Targaryen. Even though it's been years since you last saw him, let's just say you are not the same little girl you were once before. 

Warnings: The reader and Jacaerys are aged up, they would be eighteen. Uncle/niece insect. 18+ smut(eventually). Language. Mentions of assault(mainly from Aegon). Violence. And possible other warnings that I can’t think of. There is a happy ending.

Author Note: I also forgot to mention Aemond is 20 years old in this fic. I also want to give a big thanks to all of you who have heart, reblogged, and even commented my series. I honestly didn't think this series would blow up, I was mostly doing it for fun. Thank you all of you from the bottom of my heart!!

Part 02

Masterlist

__________________________________

The Dragon Dance Part 03:

You hear the knock on your door, you walk up to the door and open it. As you open the wooden door, you see your mother and father. You smiled at them and opened the door further, silently telling them to come into your chambers. They came into your chambers, closing the door behind them.

“My dear daughter, how are you doing?” Your mother Rhaenrya asked you in a worried tone. Having one hand holding yours, while the other holds your cheek.

You hold the hand that holds your cheek, giving your mother a small smile. “I’m okay mother, I’ve heard worse things. I just wished he didn’t call you that awful word.”

Rhaenrya puts her forehead against yours, “I rather have people call me every wicked name in the book, than have you and brothers being called horrible names.”

You feel Daemon but his hand on your shoulder, giving you some comfort as well. “You have some news we want to share with you Y/N.” You hear Daemon say.

You turn to look at him, “what is the news father?” You asked.

“We talked to Alicent.” Your mother replied.

Your eyes widened, you were a little surprised to hear that. You only know bits and pieces about what happened between your mother and the queen. You know there is strain in their relationship, but you know that your mother wants to repair the damage between not just Alicent but her children as well. You and Rhaenyra have talked about this multiple times, about both of you just wanting to rebuild the relationship and not have families divided. They may be strong as when apart, however they both know that together they would be stronger. 

“Oh and how did that go mother?” You asked.

“She agreed to have me take the throne and rule as queen. In exchange instead of having Jace take the throne, Aemond will take the throne after me.” Rhaenyra explained. “She also agreed to have you betrothed to Aemond. To show and prove an alliance has been made between us.”

You smile at your mother, happy that there was some progress to closing the gap. Now there is one more hurdle to jump over. Your brothers and Aegon and Aemond feud between the four of them. You heard what happened between the four of them and your heart breaks a little. All of you were close once, and now it feels like you’re all further apart.

“Are you sure you want this Y/N? I know we discussed this before, it’s not too late to back out of it.” Daemon asked with concern. Before you and your family left for King's Landing, all of you had a family meeting. Both your father and mother asked you beforehand if you wanted to be betrothed to Aemond. Rhaenyra and Daemon wanted you to choose who you wanted to marry, they wanted to give that freedom that Rhaenyra didn’t have. You agreed to being betrothed to Aemond. You wanted peace and to have your family a whole again, and you didn’t mind being betrothed to Aemond. Even though it’s been ten years, you still trust him. You know Aemond would respect you not just as a woman but as an equal. 

“I’m still sure father. I want this silly feud to end, I'm pretty sure grandfather would want his family to be whole again too.” You reassured your father with a smile.

Daemon sighed in defeat, both of your parents started to escort you to the dining hall. You see Aemond smiling at you, you're convinced he heard the news about you being his betrothed by Alicent. Aemond starts walking towards you, holding out his hand for you to take. You take his hand and he guides you to the table.

“I’m guessing your mother has told you the news then?” You asked.

“I did, dear niece, it seems you are going to become my wife.” Aemond smirked at you. “Are you sure you want this? I don’t want to force you into a marriage you don’t want?” He asked quietly.

You turn to face him, “I don’t agree with things that I don’t want to do Aemond. I agreed to become your wife not only to show alliance, but also because I want to marry you.” You reassure him, you put your hand on his cheek rubbing your thumb against it.

Aemond leans closer to you putting one of his arms around your waist, he turns his head to kiss your palm. He holds your hand that was his cheek, leans a little closer to you. Whispering in your ear, “know this my dear Y/N, once you are mine you are mine.” He growled.

Feeling his hot breath on the shell of your ear, you feel heat forming on your cheeks. “And you are mine uncle.” You whisper back.

“You are going to be the death of me woman.” Aemond growled.

You giggle at him sweetly, Aemond starts walking you to the table. He sees his brother Aegon eyeing you. Aemond knows his brother, he knows Aegon wants you because Aemond wants you. He gives Aegon a warning glare, while pulling a chair next to your brother Lucerys. You pray that this dinner goes smoothly not just for your sake but your grandfather’s as well.

________________________

Author Note: A little side note. If anyone wants to be tagged in my series, I need at least five people in order to make a full list. And I have quick question for you awesome readers. How would you feel if I made Otto the villain in this scenario? I have an idea I want to play with, but I also want your guys an opinion on it before I make it official.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I didn’t let my friend bring their partner to social events?

We are all in our 30s and all trans/NB/queer. My friend (B) and I have known each other nearly 20 years, and over those years they’ve had a rough dating history. They’ve had several emotionally and mentally abusive or neglectful partners, further details about that I won’t give here. I’ve met most of them and they’ve always disliked me for various reasons (usually they were just jealous of the place I held in their life).

Recently though, B seems to have found someone who makes them happy (we’ll call them T) and T treats them better than their previous partners. Which is great! I’m happy for B. But I find T insufferable.

Granted, I don’t have to see T very often, but when I do its always uncomfortable.

The first time I met T they trauma dumped immediately. In the first half hour I knew all about their horrible family but couldn’t tell you any hobby or interest they had. We were in a very public place and I didn’t feel it was the most appropriate topic to get to know someone, but I tried to relate with my own stories all the same. However, T always had to “one up” every story I told. it felt like a “whose childhood was worse” competition.

The second time we all hung out T ignored me completely, really only hanging around and talking to B. Since it was B’s birthday I didn’t really mind at all. Plus, we were at a beercade so everyone was kinda off doing their own thing. But even when we all sat down they just kinda threw looks my way but didnt say a word to me.

But most recently I had hosted a halloween party (it was only 8 folks so tiny party) where B and T both showed up. When T asked me how work was going I started with what I felt was a normal “Ah yeah, it sucks but—” and before I could say anything else they spoke over me to say

“Yeah you’ve mentioned you hate your job every time I’ve seen you so thats sort of my only impression of you :/ ”

(a possibly important side note: B and T are both doing things that they enjoy but have to hustle a bit to make ends meet whereas I have a full time retail job through which i have insurance so leaving isnt as easy for me since I have more tied up in my job than just a paycheck)

This really pissed me off, as not only is being interrupted a huge pet peeve, but there are aspects of my job I enjoy. I just never got to talk about them because the conversation would either divert or we would just stop talking altogether. Also the way they came across felt pretty judgmental.

T then proceeded to spend the rest of the evening talking about everything from the movie to the snacks with therapy speak and trauma processing. (ex: I think I’m locked into this movie because it might’ve been a safe haven for me during my childhood and I just dont remember watching it but I can feel its importance to me) And only ever to B, never engaging with anyone else.

(another note: they are not the only one at the party with anxiety. two of my other friends have severe social anxiety and while maybe a little awkward were still able to hold casual conversations. no one was a stranger to anyone at the party)

This also meant that I didn’t get to spend any time with B during the party either, which was a shame cause I see them so rarely.

I understand that trauma processing is important and its great if you have someone in your life that can help you. It does not need to happen every where all the time. And I’m worried that B might be getting taken advantage of like they have in the past (in the sense that they have to do all the emotional legwork in the relationship and get very little of that effort back).

I’m tired of catering to this attitude and I don’t enjoy being around them, so I no longer want to involve them in group events I host.

would that make me an asshole?

What are these acronyms?

[xxrainshadowsxx]

New Elite Chapter 7

“Alice, keep your voice down!” you growl at her, while glancing at your mother to see if she heard anything. She hasn’t exploded, so it was unlikely. One small miracle. You turn back to Alice to face the matter at hand.

“How did you find out?” you ask in a low whisper, causing Alice’s eyes to widen.

“So you are courting him,” she breathes. Damn her. You should’ve known better than to fall into one of her traps like that. “I knew there was something between the two of you,” she continues. “He had neither the eyes nor the patience for anyone else when you fainted. And when you were speaking to him outside, your body language was far too relaxed for being very nearly alone with a man you had only claimed to have met once before.”

You’re speechless when she pauses to draw breath. Her perception must have only sharpened while she was away. You yourself hadn’t even noticed some of the things she pointed out. Were you really that relaxed around him? You certainly didn’t feel that way.

“Oh, why did you not tell me?” Alice wails, causing you to wince and attempt to shush her again, but to very little avail. “A fine joke you’ve made of me! You let me go on and on about how I fancied him, while you were having a laugh behind my back.”

“Alice, it wasn’t like that at all,” you try to assure. “Please, quiet down. The only reason I said nothing is because I’ve told no one. It’s not a very public courtship, and we’d very much like to keep it that way. I had no intention of teasing you, I promise.”

Alice furrows her brow. “Oh, alright. If I can believe that of anyone, it would be you. You’ve never been malicious. But how in heaven’s name did you get your mother to agree to the courtship in the first place?”

You shift, guiltily, which is enough of an answer for Alice; she gasps and covers her mouth. “She doesn’t know?” she realizes. “You entered into a courtship without telling your mother? Your mother?! What on earth possessed you to do that?”

“We both knew she wouldn’t agree,” you start, but you’re once again interrupted by Alice. She puts her hand up to pause you, then calls for another drink. You stay silent until you’re relatively alone again. “If you want me to explain, you’ll have to actually let me talk,” you point out with a roll of your eyes.

“If I’m going to hear all the details about your salacious love affair, I need a drink,” Alice states boldly.

“There’s no love affair,” you groan. “I’m not in love with him. He chose me because he needs to marry into an established family, and I accepted simply because I do not need to be a perfect little housewife with no voice of her own to please him. He lets me speak my mind without holding my tongue, and I’ve found it refreshing. That is all.”

“That’s so boring!” Alice pouts, but before long she narrows her eyes at you. “You wouldn’t risk ruining your relationship with your mother just for someone who lets you speak however you want. There’s more to it. You absolutely fancy him, whether you realize it or not yet.”

“I most certainly do not,” you insist stubbornly. “But I can get along with him well enough, and I believe he’ll give me a good life. That’s all I could ask for.”

Alice just scoffs at you. “I don’t believe you for a minute,” she declares before glancing towards Mr. Onceler. He’s back into a corner of the room, and has resumed staring at you. She sighs in defeat. “Well, I concede to you. I doubt anything will sway his affections for you. I shan’t waste my time by pursuing him further.”

You let out a deep breath of relief. “Thank you Alice. Truly. But you mustn't tell anyone. This must stay quiet and away from my mother’s ears until we’re engaged,” you stress.

“Oh, you have nothing to worry about on that front. I can keep a secret,” she insists, but you’re still skeptical, and for good reason. Despite her assurances to the contrary, Alice was horrible at keeping secrets. If a thought entered her mind, it was almost certainly going to come out of her mouth.

“It looks as if we’re starting dinner,” Alice points out. “I guess that’s our cue to rejoin everyone else. And I shall see if I can’t find another handsome, rich man for myself.”

“Mr. Hunte is free,” you tell her under your breath as you thread your arm through hers and make your way over to the table where her parents and your mother have already taken seats. “It would be wonderful to not have to worry about him approaching my mother, and I’m sure your charms will be enough to endear him to you.”

“Sorry to make things more difficult for you, but he’s not my type,” Alice shrugs as you take your seats. “Call me vain, but I’d like to look at my husband. Sorry dear.”

“It’s alright,” you sigh. “It’s not your job to make my life easier, or to fix the consequences of my actions.” You keep your voice down since you’re now around others. Your table soon fills, with Mrs. Ryan and Thomas Hunte joining you, your mother, and the Eaton’s. You were hoping Mr. Onceler would join you as well, but he’s across the room from you, once again making powerful friends and associating with powerful men. That’s clearly where he thrives, and things probably won’t change once you’re married. You sigh briefly, then do your best to focus on the situation at hand.

Predictably, if not a bit disappointingly, your mother is doing her best to speak with Thomas Hunte as much as possible. You knew she wanted you to marry him, but it would never happen. And if you were being totally honest with yourself, the longer you thought about it, the more lucky you considered yourself. You’d always have to watch yourself with Thomas Hunte. With Mr. Onceler, not only were you given the gift of choice, you were also given the freedom to be true to yourself. He’d already seen you at your rudest and most uncouth, and he’d still chosen to be with you.

And yet, the hindrance of Thomas Hunte’s preference for you lingered. You didn’t know how to stop it without being rude to him, which would only be as a last resort. Despite not wanting to marry into the family, you absolutely did not want to make enemies of them either.

And yet, that might be inevitable. Even though Mrs. Ryan was doing her best to help you and keep his attention otherwise occupied, he made a considerable effort to engage you in conversation. You tried to end these conversations as quickly as you could, but there was only so much you could do with your mother sitting right there.

And when the music playing began to shift to something more lively, and as people got up to dance, you knew you were going to have to do something. You could see Mr. Onceler from the other side of the room begin to stand and make his way over to you. Mrs. Ryan could distract either Mr. Hunte or your mother. She couldn’t do both.

That left one option. “Alice!” you hiss in her ear, praying with everything in you that no one else would hear you. “I need you to distract my mother for a moment, please?”

“Why–” Alice looks up and sees Mr. Onceler heading in your direction. “Oh fine. But you owe me.”

You nod a hasty acceptance of her terms as Alice calls your mother and launches into a discussion about the latest fashions in Europe and how she and yourself could start the fashion in the States. It gives you just enough time to surreptitiously leave the table and meet Mr. Onceler halfway.

He doesn’t even bother to ask you the question. He simply takes your hand and escorts you out with the other couples dancing. Even as you get into hold and he starts waltzing with you, he stays silent, simply staring down into your eyes.

“Are you planning on keeping me to yourself for the rest of the night?” you tease. “I would think that would send a bit of a message if you do.”

“I’m fully aware of that,” he says. “Though if I had it my way, I would steal your full attention for this evening and all the rest that follow. As you might have surmised by now, I’m afraid I’m not fond of sharing. Jealousy may be a sin, but it’s one I haven’t yet been able to conquer.”

“Jealous of what, pray tell?” you question, enjoying the banter between you two for once. “My time? My attention? You cannot possibly claim to want all of either of those things of mine.”

“I can claim it, and I will,” he declares. “When I see you with other people, especially other men, I find I burn inside. I don’t quite understand it, but I do suppose I’ve never liked it when other people put their hands on my things.”

That statement makes you raise your eyebrow at him. “I’ll have you know that I’m not your property,” you sniff.

He curls his lip down at you, making you feel a lurch in your stomach that you don’t have a name for. “No, you aren’t my property. Not yet, anyway. Once you become my wife, you’ll find the whole world will view you as belonging to me.”

Your mouth twists at his words. You were very much aware of how the world still viewed women, despite the fact that women were starting to fight back. However, once you get over your initial ire, you notice something about the way he worded his statement. “The world may only ever see me as belonging to you,” you start cautiously, then continue when he doesn’t stop you. “But is that how you shall see me sir? Just another possession in your collection?”

“I tend to think living beings have a bit more autonomy than objects,” he replies, his eyes sparking. “And I would certainly never think of caging a pretty thing like you.”

“That doesn’t answer my question,” you say immediately, not backing down. “You’ll have to do better than just calling me pretty to distract me from seeking the answer I want.”

He actually laughs out loud at that. “Ah, this is why I picked you,” he muses before looking directly at you. “Well, let me be clear then. No, I don’t see you as my possession, and that will not change upon our marriage.”

“Now, was that so hard?” you ask, flashing him a deceptively sweet smile. “For someone who claims to dislike mind games, you seem to me to be a liar in that regard.”

“I’m not,” he denies. “I don’t like the mind games society often plays on each other. You, on the other hand, are simply amusing to tease, and you can give it right back to me. This particular ‘game,’ as you call it, I get great enjoyment from.”

“And why is it that you delight in vexing me so?” you continue your barrage against him. “I would think, considering that we are going to be spending a great deal of time together, that you would want to find yourself with my good opinion of you.”

He raises his eyebrow at you. “‘A great deal of time?’ We’re going to be married. You can call it what it is. Unless of course, you’re afraid to acknowledge the truth.”

His words stun you; you hadn’t anticipated him coming back at you with that at all. But as you give it a little bit of thought, you’re forced to admit to yourself that he’s not entirely wrong. You wouldn’t say you were scared, but you definitely hadn’t fully grasped the situation yet. In your mind, of course, it was very simple; you had all but actually said yes to marrying him at this point. But knowing that, and absorbing the enormity of that decision, were two different things entirely.

“I’m not afraid of it,” you say softly. “I just don’t think it’s completely… sunk in. Understand, I have been told my whole life that my entire purpose is to find a husband and have a family. And now that it’s actually happening, the change is almost overwhelming.” You do your best to explain, but you aren’t happy with your own words. Your feelings about the situation seemed impossible to accurately describe.

“You and I are coming from opposite ideals imposed on us in our upbringing,” he notes, almost making you start. Other than getting annoyed when you brought up Atlanta, he had never said anything about his childhood. You pay close attention now, not wanting to miss a word.

“What were you taught?” you ask carefully. “I’m afraid I’m unfamiliar with what education gentlemen receive.”

He lets out a short, barking laugh. “I don’t know what that’s like either,” he snorts. “You’ve pointed out several times that I am New Money, and that is more true than you could have imagined. Most families who make their money the way I have are part of the middle-class. My family is thoroughly lower than that, having to work since young childhood to even get food on the table.” His face darkens for a moment. “At least, most of us are working. My mother has never worked a day in her life, no matter how destitute we were, and I don’t think she ever intends to.”

“Does your father do all the work then?” you ask. But as soon as you mention the word ‘father,’ Mr. Onceler suddenly can’t meet your gaze, and the tips of his ears redden.

“No. My father died when I was young,” he mumbles, still unable to look you in the eye. You don’t understand why that comment would trigger an almost embarrassed response from him. Your own father had died when you were young as well, and you suspected early death was even more common in the working class.

“That’s something we have in common,” you murmur. “My father also died when I was small… leaving us with a mountain of debt and nothing but an old name that my mother pretends has more value than it actually does.”

“You’d be surprised at the importance of names,” he says, and interestingly enough, he still seems perfectly genuine, not a hint of sarcasm bleeding into his tone. “Of course, in this company names can open doors and create opportunities, but they’re more than that. They’re the first bit of identity we have to carve ourselves from.” As he’s speaking, you notice he has a faraway look in his eye, almost like he’s talking more to himself than to you. Intentional or not, he was revealing something huge about himself: who he was, and how he fit into this world, was of vital importance to him.

You allow him to stay lost in thought as long as he needs, and it’s not long before he snaps back to the here and now with a slight shake of his head. “Enough about that,” he mutters. “I think you were asking me what I was taught as a child? What education I had as a poor boy from Atlanta?” The smirk is back on his face now. He clearly wants you to think he’s debonair, without a care in the world. You’d play along for now, but you knew better. There was depth beneath the surface, and you fully intended to get him to open up to you, but only when the time was right. If you pushed too hard now, he might close himself off forever.

“Oh stop,” you tell him with a good-natured roll of your eyes. “I’m not attempting to look down on you for not being raised in the same society that I was. I’m simply trying to learn more about the man I am to marry. Do you not agree that our lives would be easier if we become, at the very least, friends?”

His eyes narrow ever so slightly, though he can’t stop a small curl of his lips, and you think you might have just impressed him with your wit. It certainly was nice to play with him at his own game. “I can’t fault you for wanting to know me better,” he starts slowly. “However, I must warn you, if you continue to insist on digging, you might not like what you find.” He leans closer to you, making your breath hitch for a moment. “I’m a difficult man to like.”

You take the smallest breath in order to steel yourself. You wanted to prove to him that you weren’t going to run. What was more, his words only inflamed your curiosity. The desire to know more about him was addictive. He was an enigma, one that you desperately wanted to solve, and you’d given up trying to understand why at this point.

You pull away from him so you can look him in the eyes. “And I’m a difficult woman to scare,” you say, your voice low. He meets your gaze and you hold steady, determined to not even blink. You will not break before he does.

A minute passes, and for that minute, even though you can vaguely hear the music and feel yourself moving along the floor, your world has been narrowed to the ocean of his eyes. Is he moving his face closer to you? You can count every one of the faint freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks…

But the minute passes, and he closes his eyes with a soft chuckle. “What’s so funny?” you ask him, a bit annoyed that the moment was over, and also annoyed at yourself for liking it so much.

“Nothing,” he murmurs. “I'm going to have to let other people enjoy the pleasure of your company soon though. I'm not looking forward to that.” As if on cue, the music comes to a slow stop, and you must go. It's too risky to spend any more time with him, although you don't relish the thought of finding a new partner either.

You carefully curtsey while he bows to you, before raising his head as you prepare to walk away. But before you can make it two paces, he grabs your hand and pulls you back.

“I can't pretend much longer,” he whispers, and you're shocked by the sudden desperation in his tone. “I don't even know if I can make it through this infernal evening. I know you agreed to a short courtship, but would you be terribly scandalized if we sped it up even further than we originally planned?”

You feel your eyes widen. He can't seriously be thinking… he couldn't possibly be about to propose now? In front of the entire peerage?

Your terror must be clear on your face, for he hastens to explain himself. “Not right now,” he clarifies. “But the next time I see you. I don't know if I have the capability to wait much longer than that.”

Your heart rate slows when you realize that the moment isn't quite upon you, then races again when you figure out how quickly it will come. You could ask him to wait, you're sure he would honor that decision, but do you really want that? Waiting only gave others the opportunity to figure you out for themselves. This way, at least you would have a small semblance of control over the storm that was surely coming.

Besides, what was the point in dragging this out further? You were already prepared to give your answer. Might as well do it as soon as possible and get it over with.

“Alright,” you whisper. All of the tension visibly leaves Mr. Onceler's body at that one word, and for once he doesn't even attempt to hide his delight and relief.

“Good,” he murmurs. “Good.” He glances around the room, specifically over your shoulder where you both knew your mother and Thomas Hunte sat. “Well, I suppose I have no more reason to take up more of your time tonight.” He bends to kiss the back of your hand. “Until I see you again,” he whispers.

“Until then,” you whisper back, and then finally he lets you go. And the second he does, you find yourself craving his presence yet again.

But you can't indulge in what you want. At least for the rest of the night, you must play the part of a girl who was unattached. Your only solace came from knowing that this would be the last time you'd be forced into this role you were coming to despise.

You don't know how you make it through the rest of the evening. It's a blurry haze to you. You vaguely recall more dancing, and definitely with Thomas Hunte at one point, but you couldn't remember any conversation or anything else. All you knew for sure was that, whenever you could risk it, you would sneak glances at Mr. Onceler. And every single one of those times, you found him looking back at you as well.

And as much as the change of fully moving on from your youth into an adult life, and all the responsibilities that came with it, terrified you, you couldn't help but yearn for the next time you would see him. It wasn't exactly the thought of getting engaged that you were so looking forward to, it was more of the fact that you just wanted to see him again. Despite everything, you were quickly growing to enjoy his company.

It was unnerving. You'd gone from a total indifference of him to ready to say yes to his impending proposal in just a couple months. And what was more, you'd been in complete control of the whole affair. The situation was as much your making as it was his.

But as the evening draws to a close, you can't find it in you to regret anything you'd done, even with your mother's wrath looming over you, getting progressively closer, you knew you could deal with it.

You glance at him one more time before you leave, a strange sense of calm coming over you. Next time you see him, he'll become your fiancé. And you could handle the storm with him at your side.

Next chapter's going to be a big one. I'll see you then.

[babyjakes]

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event | whumptember 2022

prompt | being protected

pairing | bf!ari levinson x reader

warnings | i wrote this while thinking about matilda by harry styles so automatically it's gonna be emo asf, reader has an emotionally abusive family (focus on father bc same <333), protective!!!!!ari, ari and reader’s dad face off a little, this is just me healing my inner child okay no big deal

word count | 898

i am just thinking about. this song. and like living it through dating ari basically.

maybe reader and ari have been dating for a while. and ari has come to understand the circumstances of her family life and how her childhood was. he is treating her different in every way from the abuse she endured and little by little she’s learning to love and trust with a safe partner that would never be so cruel and heartless to her.

she maintains a relationship with her family (her parents mainly) bc it’s the easiest way to keep the peace. ari supports her in this and knows it’s a complex decision to make. he would never want her to feel forced to cut them off by him, as he believes everything should be in her control and what she’s comfortable with. he knows trauma bonds can be complicated and that even though they’ve been horrible to her, reader does love them in the ways she’s learned to.

maybe there are minor conflicts or hiccups as time goes on but reader is mostly so distanced from them that she can just take space where she needs it and nothing ever becomes too much.

until a family gathering one evening when things end up finally going too far.

ari’s along with reader to visit her parents’ house, maybe her siblings are there as well and they’re all talking over dinner. the small talk is easy enough to navigate most of the time so it starts out civil and almost pleasant. but maybe reader’s father eventually starts going down a mean road, starting to pick on reader and criticize her, embarrassing her even.

ari’s face is stiffening as everyone but the two of them laugh. reader’s right next to him, her head hanging low in humiliation. he hates seeing how they treat her and how she sort of collapses into herself, not wanting to draw any more attention by calling out the harassment or defending herself. images flash in his head of pictures he’s seen of her when she was a little girl, so helpless against her abusers. it makes his blood boil to know she must be feeling so small still inside, so defenseless.

ari tries to shoot her father a look but maybe that only encourages him further and he says some really horrible, nasty things. aiming at her biggest insecurities, the places he knows will hurt most. as her father, he has the unfortunate privilege of knowing exactly how to break her down. and after one particularly despicable jab, ari’s had it.

his silverware rattles sharply against the table as it’s dropped. he rises to his feet and pushes his chair back out behind him with his legs. “that’s enough.”

reader is now looking up at her boyfriend with the biggest eyes, shocked and a little terrified; she’s never seen anyone stand up to her father before

the room is silent. no one knows what to do or say, not even reader’s loud-mouthed father himself

after a few moments the older man clears his throat and replies darkly, “excuse you, son?”

(but like let’s be real ari is bigger and stronger and just overall more beefy than him like if they were to fight… that would be really stupid on the old man’s part to accept such a challenge lol)

“i said, that’s enough. i won’t let you speak to her that way, not for another minute. how dare you? she drives halfway across the state twice a month to see you and keep the peace in the family, and this is what she gets? you don’t deserve her. and you won’t speak to her that way anymore; do you understand me?”

ari’s reaching down and taking her hand softly, his piercing gaze not leaving the man across the table for even a second. maybe the father curses and decides to stand up as well, starting off on some piss poor response, “you’re awfully bold, you son of a bitch. why i outta-” maybe he even makes the mistake of raising a hand at ari, and that’s when the devil really goes off in his eyes.

“i wouldn’t do that, if i were you,” he speaks so lowly, barely above a whisper but the room is dead silent so everyone can hear him. then he turns to reader, his voice much softer as he says, “c’mon, honey. we’re going home”

they walk out together, and no one dares to follow after them. when they reach the car at the end of the drive, ari pauses to hold reader’s hands in his own as he stands with just a few feet between them. it’s dark out but they can just make out the outlines of each other’s faces. reader’s eyes are full of tears. ari cups her cheeks and whispers through tears of his own, “i love you. i will never let them hurt you again.”

there’s a long way to go. i don’t believe that time would change your mind. in other words i know they won’t hurt you anymore as long as you can let them go.

you can let it go. you can throw a party full of everyone you know. you can start a family who will always show you love. you don’t have to be sorry, no.

my therapist will be hearing about this one 👍

[return-of-a-space-cowboy]

Servitude pt 1 (yandere Jonathan Joestar X female reader)

Warnings: implied non con

Jonathan was one of the most prestigious students at your university. He was a major in archeology, the same major you'd chosen. He had a great passion for the topic, which led you to befriend him.

He was a great study partner and a wonderful person in general. He was always so polite. He'd always opened the door for you and pulled out your chair for you to sit on.

He was a great friend, and even when he had asked for a relationship and you had declined, he had remained indifferent. You were not interested in a relationship despite how much your family insisted on it. You wanted to become an archeologist and travel the world. Jonathan was a lovely man, though, and you two were close enough that rumors around campus would spread of a possible relationship.

The university year was almost finished when the attacks in London began, and word had reached you that the Joestar mansion had been burnt to the ground. You had visited that very day you found out. You felt horrible seeing him severely injured and knowing he'd lost both his father and brother. You kept coming back with flowers daily and talked to him to help pass the time.

"Oh no, I completely lost track of time!" You gasped as you looked at your watch. It was nearly seven o clock.

You stood up and grabbed your bag before leaning toward Jonathan to give him a light hug.

"I'm sorry to leave, but I'll be in trouble if I'm out any longer."

"It's fine (Y/n); if you want, I can try to walk you to the carriage," he offered.

"No, the nurses said you weren't allowed out of the room. I don't want you to get in trouble because of my tardiness," you said.

"I'll be back again tomorrow, don't worry yourself," you continued before waving him goodbye and leaving.

You opened the front door of the hospital and felt the icy winter wind, making you pull your coat closer to your body. You looked around for your carriage, but you couldn't find it. Perhaps your driver had parked a little further away. So you walked away from the hospital, searching for the carriage, completely losing track of time. Only when you looked at your watch again did you find another hour had passed. You felt uneasy about being out this late in London. So you decided it would be best to find an inn to stay at for the night and trek home tomorrow.

You saw two men walking by and decided to ask them.

"Umm, excuse me, but do you know a nearby inn? I can't find my carriage, and it's far too late for me to walk home," you asked.

"Sure, there's one just over that way. We could guide you there if you want. It's far too dangerous for a lady like you to be out at this time of night by herself," one of the men replied.

You thought for a moment. They seemed like nice men, so you trusted them.

"Yes, please, that would be greatly appreciated," you replied and let them lead the way. Everything seemed fine until they led you to a dark ally and told you the inn was on the other side.

"I think I know where it is now. I'll take the long way around," you told them.

"Don't be silly. It'll take you forever to walk around," the other man stated.

"It's fine. We'll make sure nothing happens to you" the first man said as he grabbed your hand.

"No-no thanks," you stuttered as you tried to pull away from him but to no avail.

"Let go of me!" You yelled before the second man pulled out a knife.

"Shut up, or I'll slit your throat," he threatened. A meek squeak escaped your mouth in response. He put the knife to your neck and led you into the alleyway while the first man grabbed your purse and began to go through it.

He began to toss out your belongings before he counted the money in it under his breath before he let out a disappointed sigh.

"Is that all the money you have?" He asked you.

"Yes- yes, it is," you replied almost instantly.

"Well, that wasn't even worth the time it took to get you here," he huffed.

"Perhaps you have another way of making it up to us?" He snickered as a smile grew on his face. At the same time, the second man wrapped his arm around your waist.

"No, you can keep the money… I won't tell the police," you begged. You were pushed to the wall with a loud thud, and you fell to the snowy cobblestone. The world spun around you for a few seconds as you lay on the ground before you realized they had begun removing your clothes.

"Stop! please!" you pleaded as you tried to fight off your two attackers with little success.

You felt a lump in your throat form as your hope of escape seemed less and less likely. Tears started rolling down your face, and your body began to shiver as your coat was removed.

The first man's hand began to trail up your calf and to your thigh. Your stomach felt sick as he laughed at how pathetic you were. You closed your eyes and prayed that someone would help you. Or that they would have the mercy to let you live.

Then something warm splashed across your face and the second man let out a garbled scream. You dared to open your eyes and were met with the bloody sight of your attackers' brutalized corpses.

You looked up to see the tall shrouded figure above you, their amber eyes piercing into you. You wanted to run, but fear paralyzed you.

"Ah, miss (L/n)," they chuckled, their voice instantly recognizable.

"Dio!" You gasped. He only chuckled more.

"But Jonathan said you died in the fire."

"Is that what he thinks?" He said, very amused by your words.

"You know what (Y/n)? It's perfect that I found you here" he knelt to you and held your chin in his hand. A strong gust of wind blew and caught the cloth he used to obscure himself. Most of his body was covered in third-degree burns. He should not have been alive or able to move around as if it were nothing.

"Yes, I think you'll be a perfect piece for my revenge on Jonathan."

"Revenge?" You asked shakily.

🩸🩸🩸

Jonathan grew worried when you hadn't visited the next day but assumed that maybe your parents had grounded you after being late. Only after a few more days had passed did he know something was wrong.

Even during his quest to stop Dio, you still lingered in the back of his mind. The possibility of what happened made him sick to the stomach. Only when one of Dio's minions held your embroidered purse did he know what happened, and it was worse than anything he had imagined.

[leastrife]

Ansem TW doesn't deserve as much hate as he gets

This is following up to my previous post about how I don't think Ansem TW deserves as much hate as the fandom gives him and this kinda just me rambling about why I think he's a better character/person than people give him credit for.

If we start chronologically (which I'll be doing to keep this cohesive) we first see him at the end of BBS finding Terranort, who I will be refering to as Xehanort for the rest of this post, and bringing him to the castle. Now surely somewhere in this town there's a hospital, but instead of bringing Xehanort there Ansem takes him in (and I will be throwing 'he had to take him in for plot reasons' out the window) because Ansem is a good leader. I really want to believe there's a reason Ansem is the ruler of Radiant Garden and that that reason is that he's ultimately a good person. In KH1 all of the FF characters talk about how Ansem the Wise was a good leader and the only reason they went back on that later was bedcause of Ansem SoD. So because Ansem is a good person of course he's going to take Xehanort in himself to make sure he gets the care he receives because as far as Ansem would be aware Xehanort is one of his citizens, he's in Radiant Garden so this is someone Ansem is supposed to care for.

Going even further into this point another example of Ansem providing care for someone in need is Ienzo. Once again surely there's some sort of orphanage in Radiant Garden, now the circumstances of Ienzo's pseudo adoption by the apprentices and Ansem is vague but stay with me. Many of my previous points stand the same for Ienzo. Ansem sees a child in need and yes also potential for scientific genius, but even with that he still cares for Ienzo like a son seen through when we see Ansem and Ienzo walking through the halls and also Ienzo's reaction to seeing Ansem again in KH3 is not that of just a leader and apprentice. Ienzo has clearly seen Ansem as some sort of parental figure or a very significant role model in his life and that doesn't happen if Ansem didn't give him a reason for that.

What happens next is actually something I find really traumatic for Ansem. Given his relationship to Ienzo I can only imagine Ansem sees all the apprentices as his family, a family he's made for himself that he's always ready to expand, and they betray him. His family betrays him and pushes him away and he's left with darkness. He tells Xehanort to stop the experiments because if he does the world will be destroyed and Ansem is responsible for the well being of his citizens, and even after that not only is he betrayed by Xehanort he's also betrayed by his entire family. He's betrayed and then he looses his world. The hurt and feeling of failure he's feeling at this point is probably insane.

Now at this point Ansem is DiZ and this is the version of him people seem to focus on and hate because of his dehumanization of Nobodies and I will not be trying to argue he was in the right, but I think his reaction is completely understandable. He's betrayed and the next time he sees his family is as these Nobodies who are very differnet to the people he knew. Cruel, heartless (literally), and not even using the same names anymore. Of course he's not going to see his family and instead will just see these new creatures parading around as his family. They are different people at this point, and they do not have hearts as far as Ansem is concerned, no wonder he hates Nobodies. To him Nobodies took his family and are trying to pretend to be them now. This doesn't excuse how he treats Namine and Roxas, but doesn't make his behavior seem completley 1 dimensional.

At the end of KH2 he sacrifices himself and I understand people not caring much for this part, at this point (with how the games were released) we only know that Ansem used to rule Radiant Garden, he's DiZ, and DiZ treated Namine and Roxas horribly, and sacrificing yourself and the end of the story isn't good enough to make up for what you did wrong. I'm not a fan of a character being a horrible person all throughout the plot and then get a redemption through dying for someone, but in KH no one ever just dies and Ansem is given more backstory later on.

Finally arriving at KH3 despite not giving him a lot of screen time Ansem is given a proper start to his redemption arc. We see him in the realm of darkness and whenever anyone goes there we can almost always see a lot of contemplation going on within the characters there which makes sense since there's not much else to do. He's been given time to think and reflect and part of his reflection is realizing he hurt Namine and Roxas, and Riku to an extent as well, and he states he wants to make up for it. He wasn't given a whole lot of opportunity, but I hope in later games we continue to see the Radiant Garden family and that Ansem is begining to make up for his mistakes. I want to bring up Ienzo again too because if Ansem wasn't a good person I can't imagine Ienzo getting that emotional over seeing him again. ("Ienzo was a child and Ansem was an adult figure in his life of course he's emotional after seeing him") Yeah okay, but we also see Aeleus and Dilan getting emotional (as emotional as those two ever are) over seeing him again.

I doubt too many people will read this, but if you did thank you for going on with my ramblings. I really like Ansem the Wise and I wish more people did too because I think he's gone through a lot and deserves a good redemption. If your family betrayed you and got the world you're responsible for destroyed and then turn into Nobodies I'm sure you'd be upset too.

[thatbitchkimkelly]

So this is the Vanity fair article that all those season 2 predictions came from.

“Although Freaks and Geeks never got within hailing distance of a second season, that didn’t stop Paul Feig and Judd Apatow from imagining what might become of their characters in a further future.

“I would keep my own private notes as the season went along,” says series creator Paul Feig, “but there was never a time when we sat around a table and said, ‘Let’s plan Season Two.’ It was really more just ‘Hey, it would be funny if’ or ‘This would be cool.’ But we so knew the writing was on the wall: We never got too deep into it, because we never thought it was going to happen.”

One thing he knew for sure was that, had the show gone on, his kids wouldn’t have stayed in high school forever. “It was going to become much more of a story of a small town and who gets out and who doesn’t.” And he still dreams of turning the series into a stage musical. “I want to bring the spirit of failure that I brought to TV to the Broadway stage. ‘Guys, don’t worry—you’re going to lose a lot of money up front, but 10 years from now people are going to be talking about this play.’”

Read more of Feig's Freaks and Geeks Season Two predictions below:

Lindsay Weir (Linda Cardellini)

Paul Feig: I always figured something bad was gong to happen to Lindsay when she was out with the Dead. [The series ended with her ditching a summer-school program to follow the Grateful Dead with Kim Kelly.] I was hoping the second season would open with her being taken out of a concert on a stretcher while Queen’s “Tie Your Mother down” plays. That’s all I had. But I thought it would be interesting—she comes back, has completely lost the trust of her family; so she’s in even deeper having been really been outed as a problem. But there wasn’t a strong direction I had for her; I just knew she’d probably end up at some point in her twenties in Greenwich Village as a performance artist, and after that she’d probably become a lawyer—a human-rights lawyer.

Sam Weir (John Francis Daley)

Sam’s future was going to be drama club. Because that was my experience in school: I got deep into drama club. That was the storyline I was most excited about, because I was going to portray what actually happened to me. I thought he’d be more on the stage crew than actually performing, just because that was kind of interesting, the guys that were keeping it together from behind the scenes. But my drama teacher, who was one of the biggest influences on my life creatively, was an alcoholic, and over the course of my sophomore through senior year, she got worse and worse and started depending on me. I’d get called away from class under the guise of an emergency, and it would be her on the phone saying, “You’ve got to come pick me up. I left my car at the bar last night.” So I was really excited to get that going, this weird kind of taking-care-of-an-adult relationship, while he’s still learning amazing stuff from her, this tortured drama-teacher soul. That bummed me out the most, not getting to play that story out.

Neal Schweiber (Samm Levine)

Another burning desire I had was to get Neal into swing choir. Now Glee has taken it and run with it, but I always thought that would be a funny world for Neal to go into. There’s a weird little clique, and you have all these inside jokes, and all these kind of obnoxious performance things you bond with people over—I just thought he would really blossom in there and think he was kind of the king of the school. We figured it could be his outlet while his parents are going through a really horrible divorce. Since Judd had gone through that in his real life, that was kind of going to be his domain—telling all his tales from adolescence through that.

Bill Haverchuck (Martin Starr)

With his mom dating Coach Fredricks, Judd and I liked the idea of Bill slowly becoming a jock—that he turned out to be good at basketball and started to get into it, so that he was getting pulled a little more over to the jock side. Which would create an odd little rift with him and the other geeks. Because Martin is quite athletic in real life, and we were like, “Oh, let’s maybe play that out for him.” He works out a lot, Martin does, and at the beginning of the show he would come in with these giant biceps—we had to make him stop doing that.

Daniel Desario (James Franco)

Daniel’s such a drifter. I always liked the idea that eventually Daniel would probably end up in jail. [Laughs.] We were kind of, you know, taking him in this different direction. I wasn’t quite sure where that was going to lead. I knew it couldn’t stay in that world. I always liked the idea of: you go away for the summer and you come back and everybody’s kind of in a different place. But it’s hard to say with him; I think he had too many things pulling him in different directions. Having lost Kim, there would be a weirdness between them. But I wasn’t quite sure yet.

Kim Kelly (Busy Philipps)

I wanted Kim Kelly to be pregnant, but it wasn’t necessarily going to be Daniel’s. I thought this actually happened when she was out on the road with Lindsay following the Dead—that she shacked up with some guy, whether she was high at the moment or whatever, and comes back pregnant. That was another burning desire of mine, because when we were in high school there’d always be a girl or two who were pregnant, and it was so mind blowing. I thought it would be interesting with Daniel kind of around, and it’s not his, and it’s weird—and would he step up, since she doesn’t really know who the dad is, or isn’t really in contact with him? So maybe it was a chance for Daniel to become a young teen father—see what could have happened if we had a second season? And Kim and Lindsay—that would become a true friendship. Obviously they would have to have some back and forth and falling apart, but I like the girl power they had at the end of the last episode—they had both come through the fire in different ways and really bonded hardcore.

The Geeks of “Freaks and Geeks”

Nick Andopolis (Jason Segel)

I liked how we were kind of moving Nick towards having to go into the army, because of his badass dad. ’Cause that was a real option for so many people in my school—but he would be desperately trying to avoid it. But I was never quite clear exactly what direction we were going to go with Nick.

Ken Miller (Seth Rogen)

There was a guy I knew in school who was kind of Ken-like and he moved away to Hawaii; we were told he moved there just so he could smoke pot. I don’t know if that was the direction Ken was going to go. I always liked that we had set up that he had rich parents. But Ken’s such an enigma. I think he’s the guy that just kind of hangs around town. My instinct is we would have had the most fun searching for what his life would be. We liked to surprise people with Ken’s character—what was the thing you’d least expect he would do, or place he’d come from? I can completely see us loading him up with a lot of weird shit. I was sad we never got to show his parents, and God only knows whom we would have had him dating. I can definitely see a scenario where Lindsay would have tried dating Ken—that would be really funny. High-school romances are so flash-in-the-pan; there’s that awkwardness of having your ex walking around the school. Or, in my case, girls who turned me down but I had the awkwardness of them knowing I was into them and they had no interest in me.

Millie Kentner (Sarah Hagan)

We had actually thought about trying to turn Millie into a burnout at some point—“What? You’re what?” It would have been really fun to twist where she was going. I love changing people’s alliances. Because no one knows who they are or what they’re doing—basically they’re trying on different hats, different masks, if you will.

Cindy Sanders (Natasha Melnick)

We ended with Cindy as such a hardcore Republican. I liked her being a weird nemesis for Sam—I would have loved seeing them run against each other for student-council president. There’s nothing funnier to me than when the person you were in love with suddenly becomes this monster. You can’t figure out why you liked them. I think we would have had a lot of fun with Cindy.

Mr. Kowchevsky (Steve Bannos) and Mr. Rosso (Dave “Gruber” Allen)

We established [in the episode “The Little Things”] that [math teacher] Mr. Kowchevsky was gay, but we didn’t end up using that scene. I loved that storyline and was looking forward to playing with that, having it get out. [Guidance counselor] Rosso’s always on such a journey of discovery; it would have been fun to put him through some crises. I love that he had a band—Dave (Gruber) Allen and I actually had a band at the time; we were the house band at a place in Burbank called the Butcher’s Arms. We played there every weekend. There’s something funny to me about guys who won’t have a career in music but who are still trying to start a band at the age when you probably shouldn’t be trying to start a band. We could have had a permanent set of some low-rent club where Rosso was in the house band.

Harold and Jean Weir (Joe Flaherty and Becky Ann Baker)

Mr. and Mrs. Weir just kind of go along their way and have their crises of trying to figure what to do about Lindsay and how to protect her. And then Sam, whatever problems he has coming up.”

——

It’s definitely not as shitty as I thought it was from the one line summaries I had seen going around in comments on videos or on here. Like Lindsay just ODing and that’s her plot. No, they had more ideas for her.

Still it’s not like this was a script. And it wasn’t set in stone. Not only would they actually have to write it into coherent episodic storylines, actors and actresses often do have a lot of input with improv and script changes during the production process. They really didn’t know what the fuck they were going to do.

[gunmetalgrey]

H E A D C A N O N | THE DEATH OF SEBASTIAN MORAN

TW FOR DRUGS, ADDICTION, OVERDOSE AND DEATH.

Note: over the last ten years, @epiitaphs and I have worked together to create a shared Moran Family. I am always open to writing with other Morans and would love to do more in general, however if you do not write a Moran then THIS is the events in Alex’s canon. If you would like to understand more or plot familial ties with Alex, please know my IM’s are always open. And to @epiitaphs, Alex the muse will always hate you for making Alex the cat.

Sebastian Nikolai James Moran was the eldest of the Moran children, and Alex’s hero. They always struggled with a weird and uneasy relationship, given the age gap. He and Severin liked to pretend Alex was invisible for several years while she was small until as an unruly and hellish teenager she had a sense of rebellion that could outshine his own. They were alike in some ways, and vastly different in others. Over the years there were phases of talking and not talking, which became worse in the early 200’s when Sebastian officially cut off the entire family.

Struggling with undiagnosed PTSD and a dishonourable discharge that his father had managed to get him rather than the prison time he had been due to serve, Sebastian turned to opiates. And murder as a means of earning enough to keep up the habit. Alex didn’t know of this until much later, she herself was injured in the line of duty in November 2010. Despite all the friction between them, his last known number was her emergency contact and he had been the one to nurse her back to functional health. It was during this time she learned of what she had missed in his life, and when forced to take her own discharge on medical grounds, asked to help him in his new found criminal career as well as helping him stay sane and sober. Seb was clean since November 2009, and planned to stay that way.

It wasn’t an easy fit, in February 2014 Alex faked her death and forced an unknowing Sebastian to identify the body. This is the last time she existed as Alex Moran, and any other relatives believe she is buried somewhere near Bristol. She showed up in Sebs flat two weeks later with little to no explanation. And worse still, they fought physically in March 2014 when Alex tried to leave to work alone.

Sebastian is the one who had a relationship with Moriarty (known as M) in whatever twisted way that could be understood. Alex didn’t know much about their deal until March 2015- when Sebastian made a further bargain with M. For nearly 18 months, Alex had been captured and tortured by Georgian terrorists and when learning she was alive, Sebastian made a deal for her freedom. She too would work for Moriarty to earn back her ransom.

Alex did not agree to this and wasn’t aware of the promises made till much later (when it was far too late). She had always resented and hated M, and generally does not deal with him at all. Sebastian in the middle man- or he was. In September 2017, Alex was finally pushed too far.

She was asked to kill a family of 5, including three children. Up to this point, Alex had been able to live with herself by counting the lives she had ended as for the better, usually criminals or those wishing to bring harm. But she has always had a rule about children. And she told Moriarty that this was too far. He could end their deal, he could take her life, but she would not hurt a kid. Ever.

Alex believed her defiance had been heard and maybe even respected. She was sent on another job out of town for a week, and out of contact. She returned to London to find news of the family in Sweden found massacred in their home, and knowing it had to be Sebastian who had committed the horrible act, she went to his flat to confront him.

Instead she found him dead of an apparent overdose.

To her dying day, she doesn’t believe he would have relapsed. She is left with his cat (Also called Alex, as a sick in joke) and a mountain of grief she cannot begin to process. As well as the same employer she believes is responsible for his death. Sebastian’s body was found in his apartment, his indoor cat rehomed to a happy family and the tabloids having a small field day over the third dead child of the MP Thomas Moran. It took a week for Alex (the human) to trap Alex (the stray black cat) in order to make sure she wasn’t a nuisance for other neighbour and to have the last connection to her brother. The apartment was sold, the media moved on and everyone else forgot about the junkie son of a House of Lords politician.

Except for Alex, who finally understood there was no safety while M was alive.

[loominggaia]

Sorry for asking another question so soon, and double sorry if you've answered this before, but would Skel care about what happened to Rye?

You've mentioned before that he'd be ashamed of her, but how would he feel knowing that A. She was killed in a horrible way after being crippled? And B. That one of his friends was the one that caused it?

Also does Evan even know Skels full name? And even if he does, does he not remember Ryes full name?

Please take this meme as payment.

Ginger reading the letter that Itchy forged:

Dude never apologize for asking questions, that's what this blog is here for! Every question helps me develop this world even further. I appreciate each and every one. <3 Flood this inbox with as many questions, comments, and memes as you like. They literally give Looming Gaia life!

Speaking of memes, this one gets a gold star. ★ It's SO easy to picture Ginger just squinting at that letter like "bitch wat the fuk..." lmao

And that is a hell of a good question too...I had to think about the answer for quite some time. Here's my logic:

We know Skel is ashamed of being a slave, and by extension, a goblin. He's ashamed of every aspect of his ancestry. I imagine he would be ashamed of his parents because of this, and by that I mean he wouldn't want to be seen with them. He doesn't want to meet them. He doesn't want anyone to know them or where he came from.

Skel remembers very little of his mother. He remembers her name, but he doesn't know that Evan's family used to own her as a slave. Evan doesn't have a close enough relationship with Skel to tell him something like that, nor does Skel know Evan well enough to tell him his full name, so Evan does not realize Rye was related to Skel.

In short, neither Skel nor Evan realize that Rye ties them together.

If Skel realized that Evan was responsible for her death, I imagine he'd have very mixed emotions. He'd probably feign indifference at first, acting like the whole thing didn't bother him. He'd say, "Well, that's what she gets for giving up her name! I'd rather bite off my tongue than let it speak my name to a lasher! So another worthless, lowly hob lies dead in the ground, who cares? Not me! I rose above that life! It's no skin off my nose!"

And I think he'd truly believe that at first. But deep down this knowledge wounds him, and over time this wound begins to fester. He'd carry this pain around for a while, stuffing it down over and over every time it tried to rear its head, telling himself that his mother got what she deserved and her life never mattered anyway, so why should he cry for her?

But there would come a day, probably months later, when he tries to reassure himself...and he can't, because no fae can lie, even to themselves. He would finally have to admit to himself that he's hurt. And with that admission, I think he'd fall apart emotionally. All that pain he was holding back would spill out at once, and his friends would see him suddenly "snap" for no apparent reason.

He'd go apeshit on Evan out of nowhere. Maybe the crew is having dinner in the dining hall, Evan makes a little comment that rubs Skel the wrong way, and it turns out to be the straw the breaks the camel's back. Skel stands up and attacks Evan with a telekinetic pulse, sending him flying across the room. He'd start screaming with tears in his eyes, calling Evan a heartless lasher and so on, and the crew would be utterly confused as to why...

Except Evan. Evan knows why, and he feels terrible about it. Skel storms off and Lukas is furious at him, advising Evan to suspend him for this--or better yet, fire him!

Evan refuses to punish Skel. He simply tells Lukas that everyone has bad days, and later on he talks to Skel in private. The two have a real discussion about their feelings over this matter, holding nothing back this time, and they're able to finally reconcile with eachother about it.

That's just one possible outcome for this scenario though. I think there could be lots of different answers!

*

Questions/Comments?

Lore Masterpost

[giornosaiyaman]

My take on SW Rebels

Before we talk about the series proper, let’s discuss the element in the room, the animation.

I don’t like how Rebels looks. The character acting is objectively better than early TCW. Furthermore, I admire the attempt to base the style on Ralph McQuarrie’s concept art. However, the execution does not work. The choice to make the characters look like a mix of anime characters and Kenner toys backfired horribly, especially when combined with TCW’s stiff, weightless animation, and bland poses. The characters look, move, and feel like lifeless, plastic toys, and that’s not good.

Now onto the writing.

Contrary to popular belief, I think Rebels season one is the best of the bunch. If it weren’t for the bad aesthetic and weightless animation-it would be an A, with the bad aesthetic and weightless animation, it’s a B+.  Written by the great Greg Weismann, Season 1 does a great job establishing Lothal, Ezra’s trauma, the mystery of fulcrum. and the ghost crew’s found family dynamic. It also tells a tight, small scale story that revolves around the freaking awesome grand inquisitor, voiced brilliantly by Jason Isaacs.

G.I works because he wallops Kanan  three different times, and challenges Ezra and Kansan on psychological levels, which develop their relationship further.

Yeah, the show had narrative problems-an over reliance on guest cameos, filler episodes, the incompetent storm troopers and the Inquisitor failing to kill the ghost crew, but the voice cast really picked up the slack-just like the TCW voice cast.

However, the show pulled a really cool trick. It actually addressed the Empire’s incompetence during Call to Action, and had kanan sacrifice himself in order to save the crew.  All these story threads coalesce and build to a killer finale that pays off all the ghost crew’s character development, reintroduces Ahsoka in an organic way, and brings back Vader.

Then Weismann left, and things fall apart.

Season 2 has some really good eps, but Filoni’s incompetence starts rearing it’s ugly head again. The new inquisitors sucked, the show grew bloated, the ineffective imperials turned fans against the ghost crew, etc etc.

Season 3 sucks except for twin suns and trials of the dark saber. The show made the horrible decision to bring in Thrawn. When I first heard he was coming in I went, ““oh no. Please don’t let him be ANOTHER TCW Grievous, and I was right. Thrawn spins his wheels in trying to kill the ghost crew, and gets cheesed in the season finale, which turned fans against the ghost crew even more.

Then, you get the awful season 4 opener, the godawful world between worlds plot-which represents filoni’s Ahsoka obsession at its worst, and the unwatchable season 4 finale.

I hate Filoni so much.

[enchantestuff]

rekindle - rbr sebastian vettel

in which after a long time apart, you and Sebastian rekindle your love for one another in the least romantic place you could think of - a sweaty, packed nightclub

NOT MY GIF!!

warnings: public sex (ofc), fingering, teasing, lowkey angst at the start, nicknames, uncomfy ex, sebastain Vettel deserves a warning himself, happy sinning

taglist: @theringers​ @forestviper201 @icemanhoneybadger​ @formulamei @findthelightinyourlife

3.1k words

You smirked as your eyes met from across the club for what felt like the hundredth time that night. You hadn't seen him in over a year, the last time you were even in the same country as him had ended up with you climbing into a taxi, speeding away to the airport and him standing half naked in his driveway, wishing for the car to turn around and end his worst nightmare.

The relationship between you and Sebastsian was a complicated one to say the least. You had grown up with each other, your families vacationed together every second summer and you spent many christmases together. It was only when you got older that you started to really appreciate Sebastian.

Daydreams of what it would be like to spend a night in bed with him began to fill your free moments. Images of the two of you tangled in bed was once something that you could only dream about, but that dream certainly became a reality one unforgettable night in Italy.

It was during a celebratory dinner after yet another win that he had leaned over to talk to you. His lips brushed against the side of your neck and goosebumps had risen all over your skin, you cursed yourself for your reaction but soon began praising your childish antics once Sebastian finally caught onto how you felt about him.

The few words of “do i make you nervous, liebe?” led to the two of you making out in the corridor. That celebratory dinner escalated to a friends with benefits situation which set off a more than complicated relationship between the two of you where feelings were of course present, but stubbornness from both sides refused to let them be out in the open.

Your feelings for one another eventually escaped when he got into a nasty crash in the middle of a race. You ran up to him the minute he stormed into the garage, tears welling in your eyes as you crushed into a hug. He held you with just as much force and whispered into your ear what you had been waiting for months to hear.

He told you that you had been the only thing on his mind when he crashed into the wall and he didn't want to go a minute longer without telling you how he really felt about you

As much as you wanted things to be great with Sebastain, your relationship was unfortunately not plain sailing from there and the media had a bring role to play in your downfall. They wouldn't leave him or you alone, constantly following the two of you wherever you went and even going as far as sending mail to your shared home. It was the media that drove you to leave the man you adored and move to another country in search for a new career and a new life away from the public eye.

You stared at him now, unable to tear your eyes away from his beautiful frame. He looked as good as ever and you knew deep down that you would probably never see him again. So against your brain telling you not to, you engraved every detail of his face into your memory, not wanting to let him go just yet.

You felt horrible for leaving him and strongly believed that he hated you for abandoning him. You wouldn't have blamed him if he did, you sometimes hated yourself for that decision. So you kept your distance from him all night, repeatedly telling yourself that if he did not harbor any bad emotions towards you, then he would approach you himself.

To tell the truth, you were too embarrassed to go up to him yourself, too full of guilt to face him after what you had done. But when he made eye contact with you as he pulled a girl into his body, something inside you snapped and you found yourself being dragged into an all too familiar game of cat and mouse with him.

Your night of teasing had officially begun the minute he kissed the brunette's neck, refusing to break your stare as his hands ran up and down her hips. You decided it was your turn to reciprocate the teasing and pulled a random, but still handsome, man towards you to dance. Holding your gaze with him, you allowed the man to grip onto your hips and sway from side to side. Your ass pressing against him with every beat of the music.

You maintained eye contact with him as he chatted with multiple women, his hands resting dangerously low on their backs as he smirked in your direction, you hated how much you loved his little games.

You decided to take a dance break and stepped away from the claustrophobic dance floor. Moving towards the less packed bar, you leaned against the contour top as you ordered yet another drink. The feeling of hands wrapping around your hips didn’t surprise you, nor did the hot breath fanning across the back of your neck. You were used to the warmth of Seb’s body by now and after so much time apart, you still recognized his touch.

“Quite a show you put on back there,” he muttered, gesturing to the bartender for another drink before turning his attention back towards you. You kept your face forward, staring at the variety of liquor stacked on the shelves as Sebastian flirted with you in your ear. He was still positioned behind you, which you saw as the perfect opportunity to press your ass against his crotch.

The tightening of his grip only fueled you to press yourself further into him in hopes that you would emit an even stronger reaction from him, and boy did you get what you wanted. One of his hands rested underneath your breast and as he emitting a small amount of pressure against you, he forced you into him.

No longer leaning against the counter, you could now feel the entirety of his body pressed against you. Every vein and muscle. Every curve and dent of his body, Still, that didn't stop you from wiggling your bum against him.

“Are you trying to turn me on right now, love, or are you really that fucking oblivous?”

You twisted your head to finally look at him, momentarily taken aback by his pure beauty before regaining your confidence again. “That depends,” you hummed, purposely brushing your lips against his neck as you spoke, “Is it working?”

His hold on you tightened and somehow he pulled you even closer to him, allowing you to feel every inch and vein of his hardened cock. “Someones excited,” you smiled, immediately freezing up when you caught sight of your ex boyfriend standing next to you.

He was the man you had been with before Seb and it was safe to say he had completely broken your heart.

Confusion immediately filled Sebs body at your reaction, fearful he had done something wrong he moved to stand beside you, holding onto your bicep as he looked you in your eyes. “Are you alright, darling?” he questioned, his eyes bouncing back and forth as he searched your face for any indication of pain.

“Yeah its - “

“Y/N! Great to see you.” Dread immediately filled your body at the infamous voice, you felt yourself go rigid in Sebastian's grip and desperately wished for your ex to leave the two of you alone.

“Who's this douche?” Seb whispered in your ear, trying to relive some of your tension and comfort you in what seemed to be a terribly uncomfortable situation.

“Brad, hey,” you muttered, you grabbed hold of Sebastian's hand that was previously sprawled on the bar countertop, using the warmth of his touch as a confidence booster to finally turn around and face the brutal ex.

“How have you been?” he asked, refusing to even glance at the Redbull driver next to you, focusing his hungry gaze on you and you only.

You sighed deeply at his attempt of small talk. Could he not just say hello and move on? Did he really need to interrupt your night.

Sebastian kept a close eye on you throughout your short conversation. A sense of protectiveness filled him at your rigid stance, he knew you could handle the situation yourself but he couldn't help but want to aid you. He felt the need to get involved. So he did.

He didn’t let you answer the man's next question of what you had recently been up to, instead he grabbed hold of the side of your face, his fingers dipping into the nape of your neck as he pulled you into him. He grinned smugly at the worried glance you threw his way before connecting your lips together.

The kiss was hesitant at first.

Taking into account this was your first shared kiss together since the breakup, it felt both natural and unusual to be kissing him again, but as the seconds passed you found yourself relaxing in his hold and began kissing him back with much more force.

You lost yourself in the moment, the idea of your ex boyfriend watching you make out with your other ex boyfriend didn't even cross your mind. You solely focused on the way Sebastian’s lips felt against yours after such a long time apart. He was addicting.

Your eyes fluttered open when he pulled away, blushing slightly at the sheepish look he threw your exes way. “What were you saying, mate?” he confidently asked.

The feeling of his palm burned against your cheek and you couldn't even bring yourself to look at Brad, but you didn't need to as he just stumbled away, clearly intimidated by Sebastian.

There was no need for you to say anything to Seb - if the way you were teasing him earlier on in the evening was of no indication to how you felt about him - then the lustful look you were giving him now certainly was.

He immediately pulled you back into him, your lips reconnecting in a lustful kiss. With no more awkwardness surrounding the two of you, you found yourself enjoying it even more.

Moving one of his hands down your body, Sebastian forcefully squeezed your bum which emitted a gasp from you, allowing him to slip his tongue into your mouth, further deepening the kiss. He pressed his body against yours and your hands raked across it, feeling his muscles flex against your hands.

You moaned into his mouth the minute he dug his hips into you, the feeling of his body so close to you bringing you back to when the two of you dated. Confusion filled you when he pulled away, ending your lovely make out session and disappointing you tremendously. “Don't start what you can't finish, love” he warned, leaning down to scatter kisses across your chest, nipping and licking at every exposed area.

“Who says I can't finish this?” you remarked, grinning at the way his eyebrows rose at your statement.

“Look around us, darling” he stood up straighter, craning his neck to glance from side to side, taking into account the multiple people surrounding the two of you. Hundreds of people filled the room, hundreds of eyes that could possibly witness something. Hundreds of reasons why the two of you shouldn't get ahead of yourselves. But then again, when he looked back at you and the playful pout that crossed your features - he found himself making up a hundred different reasons as to why it was such a brilliant idea.

“But then again,” he continued, leaning closer to you in order to whisper in your ear, “that's never stopped us before.”

A shiver ran up your spine at his words, images flashing through your mind of previous encounters the two of you had in the most inappropriate areas. Cutting your daydream short, Sebastian grabbed hold of your hand and guided you up the stairs to the more secluded vip area.

The bouncer merily glanced at Sebastian before lifting the red velvet rope and letting the two of you in. Nodding a small thanks to the man, he continued his journey into the dimly lit area, a content hum leaving his lips at the sight of a small booth in the corner.

He sat down on the plush seats and you fell down to sit on top of him, the lower half of your body covered by the wooden table in front of you. Sebastian wasted no time in kissing your neck, unable to detach himself from your skin for more than a few moments.

Your head fell back onto his shoulder, watching the small group of people ahead of you dancing and laughing at each other caused a blush to quickly creep up your cheeks. The thought if anyone witnessing your antics both embarrassing and exciting you.

“Are you sure you want to do this, liebe?” Seb questioned, he placed his finger on your cheek and forced you to look at him as he spoke. “Because once we start, I won't be able to stop.”

“And why would I ever want you to stop?” you shot back, pressing your bum further into him to prove your point. Sebs eyes scanned the area, having seemingly decided the risk of getting caught was worth it, he ran his fingers up your thigh, under your skirt and into your underwear.

His other hand trailed the opposite direction, moving up your body to gently squeeze your breast. You arched your back at the sensation, your ass moving further into him and a harsh squeeze being delivered as a result.

Slipping a finger into you, his hand flew away from your breast to clamp over your mouth, muffling the sudden moan that escaped you. “You have to be quiet, sweetheart. There's people around us,” he reminded.

He littered gentle kisses up your neck and you could feel his smirk against your skin at the shaky breath you let out the minute he slipped a second finger into you. “I don't think anyone else deserves to hear your moans, darling.”

You hummed against his hand, wetness pooling at his words and your eyes fluttering closed as his thumb began to circle your clit. “Move up for a second, liebe,” he demanded once he removed his fingers from you. Having no other option but to comply, you braced your hands against the table and stood up on shaky legs. You patiently waited as Sebastain undid his belt, the sound of the metal coming undone bringing a newfound wetness to your core.

“Ready?” he questioned, moving his hand up and down your thigh to comfort you. You nodded your head, biting harshly on your lip, you quickly glanced behind you and yet another shaky breath tumbled from your lips at the sight you beheld.

Sebastain was sprawled across the couch with his dick barely covered by your body. The sight of him shamelessly sitting there did something to you and before you lost your confidence, you slowly lowered yourself down onto him.

“Keep quiet now,” he reminded once you took all of him in. Your hands gripped onto the table in front of you, your knuckles quickie turning white as you used it as leverage to start moving.

The sound of your skin hitting against sebastians was muffled by the laughter of the crowd and the loudness of the msic booming across the grand club. “I'm trying,” you grunted.

You slowly bounced on him, trying to keep your movements small and inconspicuous to the people around you. But Sebastian could only last so long without needing to take over. A moan accidentally escaped you once he began thrusting his own hips upwards to meet yours. In response to your foolishness, he grabbed a fistful of your hair, yanking not so gently on it as a warning and forcing you to look at the dim lights hanging above you instead of the people ahead of you.

Holding onto your body he quickly steadied you, forcing you to halt your movements as a random man walked up to the two of you. You shifted in his hold and attempted to reposition yourself to look more natural towards the stranger. You just wanted it to seem like you were cuddling the driver, not bouncing on his dick.

One of your arms wrapped around his neck while the other laid on his chest. You spared a quick glance downwards, making sure your skirt covered everything before looking back up at the man. Sebastian greeted him, admittedly not poilelty, but he greeted him nevertheless. It only took a few seconds for the two of you to realise he was a fan and by the looks of it, would do anything to hold a conversation with the Sebastian Vettel.

You couldn't help but move on his lap, the need for friction overwhelming you after staying put for several minutes. You slowly began rolling your hips, your heart racing at the sudden release of pressure and also at the fact you were grinding on him with a fan of his only a few feet away.

Sebastian cleared his throat, trying desperately to pay attention to the man in front of him and not on how good you felt clenching around him. His hips unintentionally runted up into you, muttering a quick curse under his breath he grimaced at the man, cutting his sentence short as he gestured towards you. “If you wouldn't mind,” he sympathetically commented.

“Right, right sorry,” he mumbled, “Enjoy your night.”

He soon scrambled away from view and Sebastian began carelessly thrusting into you again. You returned to your original position, now resting your head against the table, thankful for the pleasure filling your whole body. You could feel a bead of sweat forming on the nape of your neck and were almost certain you looked a mess but you couldn't have cared as you got nearer and nearer to your peak.

This new angle allowed Sebastian to take control of your activities. He guided your hips back and forth, not paying attention to the movement of the table nor the attention that the two of you could possibly bring your way. All he wanted was to bring you to your release. “Are you going to cum for me, darling?” he whispered. You nodded against the table, the coolness of the wood reliving your flushed cheeks as you felt the knot begin to release in your stomach.

You moved your hand to grip onto his thigh, “I'm gonna-” you mumbled, unable to finish your sentence as he gripped onto the back of your neck and forced you to sit up straight. His fingers immediately fell down your throat in a poor attempt to muffle your moans. You whimpered loudly at his show of dominance, your attempts to keep quiet failing profusely as he hurried his movements.

His fingers moved further down your throat as your walls clenched around him. Before you knew it you were spilling yourself against Sebastain. Your eyes rolling to the back of your head and heat filling your body as he followed in your actions.

[1111jenx]

🕊astro notes —

for a Friday evening🕊

I am back with another astro observations hellooo💗 please as usual take these observations with a light-heartedness and don't think too much into it<3

check out my masterlist for more post <3

Aquarius Venus individuals are actually pretty controlling, especially in personal relationships and partnerships. I would say even as controlling as Scorpio Mars. If they have Sun conjunct Venus or more fixed signs in there personal placements (Sun, Moon, Mercury, Mars, dominant planets) this can amplify the dynamic even more🖤

There's a lot of misconceptions when it comes to the first house. While it does talk about people's first impressions of you, it also talks about how you approaches life in general and theres so much more behind the 1H. It is not a facade! In addition, other houses can further show you how different people portray you differently too. For example, look into your 7H to see how you act in relationships and closest friends, 4H to see how you treat family members and how they view you, 3H is more focused on siblings/neighbours, 11H is community and friends in general, 6H is how your coworkers see you or how you act at work, 8H is how you are when you're having sex, etc🌻

⚠️ stay ⚠️away⚠️from⚠️12H⚠️synastry⚠️. unless you two both have well developed pisces/virgo placements (6h/12h too), don't go into it. Mentally and physically draining. Your romance feels forbidden and wrong somehow. This adds to the excitement yet the unexplainable sense of secrecy would eventually wear one of you down. this is very similar to 8H synastry but i'd argue that 12H in general is more karmic and painful. (house of hidden enemies)

Scorpio venus and Leo venus is a match made in hell. Wow the toxicity, the constant hate sex, the tears and the crying &screaming. Both believe that they're made for each other and would take a bullet for one another. But they don't trust each other for some reason and Leo wish that Scorpio would tone down the manipulation cause they can't afford to be played mentally again and they don't want to look stupid at the end💅🏼

Couples with the same rising signs can go so right or so so wrong. Would understand one another very well but its likely that they'd assume they know everything about one another and when placed with some foggy/neurotic/delusional placements( Neptune/pisces energy, 12H, Venus-Neptune, 4H, Pluto, Venus-Pluto,etc) can create a sense of resentment between the two. "I can see myself doing that so you must have done it" – kind of arguments are so so common🪐

Fixed moon like to be with other fixed moons. They feel safe, secured and relaxed with each other. Easily feel like they can confide in the other person right away.

Similarly, fire moons belong to fire moons. They'd feel as if there fiery emotions can only be understood by fellow fire moons. Leo Moon's fire is hard to dim and instead of resenting their proud and profound nature, Sag Moon and Aries Moon in turns hype them up and feed even more to their ego. Bestest of friends💖

Virgo Moons should stay away from Aries Moon. They attraction is undeniable and they love one another's company so much. Yet Aries's carefree nature will sooner or later stress Virgo Moon out and they'll in turns blame Aries for being too childish. They'll say horrible thing towards each other just for the sake of their ego. In love with the idea of what they could have become.

Sun in 10th house love a good challenge. The same goes for Saturn in 10th house. They believe that they need to go through trials and changes to better developed as people and while this is true, its like they'll get bored, even a bit sad when theres nothing in their way? 👼🏼

Capricorn Mars are actually pretty argumentative people and they hate illogical people a lot. They'll more likely to tone down their side if you bring in the logical aspect and be more tolerant towards their feelings rather than screaming and cussing out at them. Their rage is very terrifying. Severe hidden anger issues.

Venus in 3H loves to talk about relationships a lot. Marriage counsellor placement! 🦋 They're able to be objective when it comes to others love matters and tend to give fantastic love advice! Splendid taste in music and a keen eyes for the art. Might know a lot about current trends too and can honestly work in the beauty industry.

Venus-Saturn beauty will stay relevant forever. As tight as the orb becomes, the more relevancy will be seen! Audrey Hepburn, Yoko Ono, Katie Holmes all have this!

Aquarius Rising have a very hard to describe beauty to them. Timeless but regal. Unique but enchanting. They have a distinctive goddess energy to them and can surprise people with their grace and charm.

Aquarius Moon tend to have issues regarding their childhood, parents or household in general. A lot of them learned about the consequences of emotional attachments and quickly learn how to detach very early on. Are severely prone to anxiety and mental issues. They can use social platforms as their emotional outlet💔

Pisces placements with hints of fire energy have developed a IDGAF attitude towards everything. Literally. They rly care a lot more than they should and people fed off this caring side of them so they're very tired now. Just rather act as if they don't care than expressing what they feel.

Libra Risings practice how to smile to become socially acceptable. I'll elaborate. More than nay other Risings, they care a lot about their facial expressions and how people would perceive them. They have a lot of control over their body language too. Libra Risings and Libra Sun may feel compelled to constantly keep up a happy face or a smiley one at social gatherings too!😂

Chiron opposing Venus/Saturn/Mars synastry in couples can indicate controlling patterns from the Chiron person.

Gemini Moons are actually pretty secretive people. No one really knows them. They have a duality to them so people can have a harder time understanding them too. Excellent at showing people what they want them to see only. 🥳

People who have Pluto in their 10H naturally earn respect from others. They care a lot about heritage, the past and are naturally nostalgic individuals. They have an elegance and air of mystery to them that can seem very demanding yet also very casual. People with Pluto in their 3H on the other hand, are actually super observant people and theres this relevancy to them like no others. They would be the one to come to for the newest gossips or secrets about the community. Through their connections, Pluto 3H owns a lot of favour and knowledge that can truly turn people's world upside down. They just know everything.

Sooo that's all for today! Thank you guys for making it this far with me:)

love,

saint jenx🪐

[missmentelle]

What makes a codependent relationship? Is it healthy for someone to rely on you as a constant source for support, talking all the time? Getting seperation anxiety and experiencing extreme stress when they are without you? Is it selfish to not necessarily reciprocate that stress?

Let's start by defining what a codependent relationship is.

In a codependent relationship, one person (the codependent) consistently enables the dysfunction of another person, often assuming a "caretaker" or "protector" role. The dysfunctional person usually struggles with a serious issue that may make it difficult for them to function on their own - often addiction, mental illness, or serious underachievement/irresponsibility - and the codependent partner will make extreme personal sacrifices to take care of this person and shield them from the consequences of their actions.

Codependent relationships aren't always romantic relationships - they can be found between friends, parents/children, coworkers, other family members, or any other type of relationship. Wherever they exist, are very unhealthy for both of the people involved in them. The codependent person focuses so heavily on the dependent person's needs that they entirely neglect their own, while the dysfunctional person is enabled to continue being dysfunctional and is often prevented from making any kind of progress toward recovery.

Common traits of codependent people include:

a fear of being alone. They often seek out relationships with people who will depend on them and encourage that dependency to ensure that the other person will not leave them.

extreme fixation on the feelings and needs of others. They often view their own needs as unimportant or secondary and prioritize the needs of others, even when this has not been asked of them.

a compulsive need to "fix" the problems of others. when they see a person who is struggling, they feel the overwhelming need to step in and start "fixing" the situation, even if doing so is not their responsibility.

low self-esteem. They often have chronic issues with self-esteem, and don't feel that they "deserve" to have their own needs prioritized. Their self-esteem is often tied to their ability to maintain their caretaking role at all costs, even when it is incredibly harmful to them.

controlling and perfectionist tendencies. Codependent people often struggle to cope when they don't have high amounts of control in their relationships, or when things aren't done "just so". They gravitate towards caretaking roles where they have high amounts of control, and struggle to let go.

external locus of control. They often feel powerless in their lives, and feel that they simply have to accept their circumstances and the way that others treat them.

high capacity for denial. They often cannot or will not see problems that are right in front of them, and refuse to acknowledge the seriousness of a situation - the house will be burning down around them and they'll refuse to even admit that it's getting a little warm.

a history of interpersonal trauma or abuse. Codependency is often a learned behaviour - many people who fall into these patterns experienced codependency from their parents, or witnessed their parents' codependent relationship at a young age. Many have also experienced extreme emotional abuse, from their parents or a past partner.

a strong need for approval. Codependents need to be liked. They need approval. Doing things for others and letting others walk on them is the best way they know how to gain that.

boundary issues. They often cannot and do not set personal boundaries - they take a "Giving Tree" approach to helping others, endlessly giving even when it seriously hurts them. At the same time, they may overstep boundaries to try to fix others' issues, even when it is not their responsibility to get involved.

a lack of personal identity. The codependent relationship often becomes the focus of their whole life. They invest so much time and energy into it that without it, they wouldn't know what to do with themselves.

a tendency to be drawn to close relationships with substance addicts, alcoholics, people with personality disorders, or other codependents. Codependent relationships are usually not a one-off thing - they tend to be a recurring pattern in a person's life. In particular, people with untreated BPD often seek out relationships with codependent people, as they tend to prefer relationships with people who don't set personal boundaries and are willing to provide the extreme amounts of reassurance and caretaking that they need. People with BPD also tend to be codependent themselves, further complicating things.

an appearance of being "addicted to chaos". Codependent people often appear to gravitate toward drama, dysfunction and chaos. Having relationships with people who have healthy boundaries, autonomy and stable personal lives often holds little interest for them - they prefer relationships where they feel needed and depended upon.

Codependent people often have a "martyr" or "victim" complex - they often feel that it is their lot in life to suffer for others, that self-sacrifice is a key part of their identity, or that suffering is simply a part of loving someone. The idea that they should set expectations in a relationship, leave a relationship where they aren't treated well or have an identity of their own outside a relationship is something they struggle with. They often hop from codependent relationship to codependent relationship, becoming steadily more beaten down and burnt out in the process - breaking free from codependent tendencies can be a long process, and often requires professional help.

There is a lot of variety in what codependent relationships look like. Some examples of codependency in action would include:

A mother allows her chronically unemployed and irresponsible 38-year-old son to live with her, and does everything for him. She never confronts her son about the fact that he doesn't contribute financially or help out around the house, even though it's placing a great financial and personal strain on her. When other family members ask why her adult son isn't taking steps to get his life together, the mother becomes highly defensive, and may make up lies about the progress he's made, or insist that he's still young and that this is normal for his age.

A woman assumes the role of "caregiver" for her unstable and very mentally ill partner. She bends over backwards to keep her partner happy, and doesn't seem to notice or mind that her partner never does the same thing in return. Her partner constantly burns bridges with their own family or friends with their explosive anger, and she rushes in to make excuses and try to fix the situation. When friends raise concerns about the relationship, she brushes them off, insisting that she's happy and everything is fine.

The parent of an autistic teenager infantilizes their autistic child, and insists that the child needs much more care than they actually do. Being an "autism parent" is a huge part of their identity. The child has never been allowed to attend an overnight camp, go for sleepovers or stay at home with a babysitter, as the parent is highly fearful and believes that other people will not look after their child properly. The parent strongly resists all of their child's attempts to gain more independence, insisting that it's too dangerous or that the child cannot handle it.

The US version of the television show Shameless is almost entirely centered around codependent relationships. The main characters are all in codependent relationships with their alcoholic and dysfunctional father, Frank. Although the main characters are often angry with their father, they constantly allow him back into their lives no matter how horribly he treats them - at times, they give him money, provide him with alcohol, let him move back into their house, visit him in the hospital and cover him with a blanket when he passes out on the floor. The boundaries they set with him never last long, and they always resume having a relationship with him, even after he does things that most people would find unforgivable.

So with that said: is it healthy for someone to rely on you as a constant source of support?

It sort of depends.

Relationships are supposed to be a reliable source of support for both of the people in them. That's sort of what they're for. I worry sometimes that the internet is making us too transactional in our relationships, and too quick to think that someone is taking advantage of us if they constantly turn to us for support. It's normal to find comfort in your relationships, and to turn to your loved ones whenever you need someone to talk to. I talk to my partner, my parents and my closest friends every day - that often means mentioning things that we’re stressed or anxious about, or venting about problems in our lives. Sometimes people are going through something and need extra support for a while - that’s just a normal part of close relationships. 

With that said, there are times when someone leans on you too hard. If helping someone is starting to take a serious toll on your own life, that’s a problem. Every relationship needs boundaries; if your boundaries are consistently pushed or broken in the name of supporting that person, it may be time for a serious talk. Staying up until 4am to talk someone through a crisis is fine if this is a rare occurrence. Staying up until 4am to talk someone through a crisis multiple times per week, every single week, is an issue - that’s you sacrificing your own need for sleep, and something needs to change. Are you willing to set boundaries and balance your own needs with your friends’ needs? Is the other person willing to respect boundaries, or do they lash out with anger, guilt-trips, accusations of not caring for them or threats to harm themselves? 

If you and a friend are both willing to communicate and work on establishing boundaries, I think it’s fine for one person to need a lot of support. If the relationship is damaging for you and one or both of you just isn’t able or willing to discuss boundaries, that’s a sign there could be some codependence going on. 

A person experiencing separation anxiety and extreme stress when you aren’t around could be an issue - but again, it depends on how it’s being handled. Is your friend able to cope with this anxiety on their own, or are they constantly putting this anxiety on you? Are they blowing up your phone and getting anxious if you’re 10 minutes late answering a text? Do they ever try to guilt-trip you or blame you for triggering their separation anxiety? Do they accuse you of not caring about them if you try to take time for yourself? Are they jealous of your other relationships? Is their extreme stress taking a toll on your life and preventing you from having other relationships or having personal boundaries and space? If your friend is willing to work on boundaries and find healthy coping mechanisms for their stress, this might be something you can overcome. If your friend is burning you out and one or both of you is unable to set boundaries, this might be a very unhealthy situation. 

Not feeling the same stress and anxiety, however, is definitely not selfish. It’s not healthy for someone to feel that level of extreme stress and separation anxiety - it’s not your friend’s fault that they experience that, but it’s still very unhealthy. The fact that someone feels an unhealthy attachment to you does not mean that you should feel an unhealthy attachment right back. No one benefits from that. In any healthy relationship, both people have a life and identity outside the relationship. This is, fundamentally, the issue at the core of many different unhealthy relationships - whether they are codependent, enmeshed, or abusive.

 Being so attached to someone that you can’t handle them needing friends, hobbies, space and independence isn’t a compliment or something to aspire to - it’s just unhealthy.

Hope this answers your question! MM