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starseneyes · 1 year

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Spock / Nurse Christine Chapel - Star Trek: Strange New Worlds S2 Eps 6 & 7

Folks, the cross-over episode dropped, and I'm so fascinated by how much Spapel we got in it!

So, I'm going to combine these two since we had one very strong scene in 2x06, and several fascinating scenes in 2x07.

SPOILER ALERT: Like Boimler with the Future, I'm no good at keeping my mouth shut about what's going on. If you read this, it's at your own risk!

Ready to dive in? Let's play!

"Lost in Translation" AKA "Your Move"

"Your move." "I know."

Christina fiddles with the piece in her hand, plotting out her move. But Spock's already ahead of her and anxious for her to make a move.

Wow. Everything you need to know about the scene was set up in four spoken words.

Because Spock is now basking in the freedom of being with Christine. It's such a departure from Vulcan relationships where there are rituals and rules and procedures and requirements. But is it too far a departure to last?

And, duh, I understand that they're doomed. But from their perspective, they don't know that.

I also love the body language, here. Spock and Christine are facing off, leaning in toward one another. They are both fully engaged, but the game separates them.

Though they share the table, there are many moving pieces at play.

"Is that not a polite euphemism for 'make your move faster'?"

Now, if we're talking physical moves, Christine's got no problems with moving fast. But, if we're talking emotional? Whole n'other ballgame.

Christine responds to Spock's question by leaning forward, licking her lips, and quipping.

"Am I boring you, Mr. Spock?"

Ooohhh, I love this. I've always associated her use of "Mr. Spock" with her purposeful detachment and separation from Spock—a way to verbalize the space they must give one another.

This single use enriches every interaction going forward.

Using the reference of TOS, I truly thought it was always and only used as a phrase to denote the separation between them. But to hear those two words used in such a seductive manner does my heart good.

There are times those two words may seem innocuous to the outside world, but to these two are painful, beautiful, romantic, sexy... so many things!

"Decidedly not."

Well, I do declare! This Southern gal's gotta fan herself just from the delivery of that line. Seriously. This dude is whipped.

Spock has bedroom eyes. First we got tongue on the Bridge, then snogging in his Quarters, now eye-fucking in the Bar. Yeah, these two are coming along nicely.

Christine's glowing with those words, too. She's always enjoyed his attention and company, but now she knows the fullness of it. And, no, I wasn't going for a phallic reference, there, but now it's got no choice but to stay.

Christine's been fiddling with her piece, taking her time, dealing with her indecision. This scene says so much with so little words spoken.

Because Spock is a relationship guy. We all know that. Christine even knows that, and it's not what she wants. At least, not what she thinks she wants.

Because we've already seen that sometimes Christine doesn't know her own mind or heart.

Look how she's fiddling with the piece while she considers her move, how she's shifting in her seat, rocking back and forth. There's no clear path, here. It's all one step at a time for her, while Spock's got the board and pieces memorized so long as he moves are predictable.

Problem is, Christine's far from predictable.

"Your move."

This time, it's teasing. Christine meets his eyes, but before she can even return to the board, he continues.

"There is a matter I've been meaning to discuss." "Should I get a drink first? You sound serious."

She knows him. Anyone else listening in might've thought it was a casual thing, but Christine knows his inflections and intentions so well that she immediately clocks that he wants to discuss something heavy.

"You wanna tell Starfleet about this."

Watch how Christine deflates. Relationships are sticky. Relationships are messy. They're annoying, but she can handle it.

But throw in structure and formality? Christine's gonna bolt fast if you try to tie her down. That's her M.O. And a part of her knows she's not ready to bolt from Spock.

"If there is anything to tell."

I love this bit. This is such an echo of every time Christine has made space for him. He's learning from her, and finding comfort in more of his humanity through their shared time.

And this trait's a rather beautiful one to pick up, I think. He is speaking without expectation, even though we all know what he'd like to hear. He's making room for her to say whatever she is going to say. And that's important.

Christine makes a move while considering his words or avoiding them. It's hard to say. But, Spock's letting her know he wants an answer.

He counters her move.

"Your move."

He's not letting up, Christine. You gotta tell him something.

She places the piece she took on the table, letting her hand hover over it. The last move, he took a piece of hers. This time, she took a piece of his.

And while I'd argue relationships shouldn't be "taking" pieces of one another, I think that we bleed into one another through clear communication and love. Pieces of us are shared and safe-guarded by the other party.

Let me tell you, I've rarely seen my husband angry. He has a lot of patience. But when he hits his limits, it's usually been when someone was unjustly attacking me. He's a freakin' fierce protector in those moments.

Christine and Spock aren't to the point of "clear communication and love", yet (and may never be, if history holds), but they're definitely more than "friends with benefits", much as Christine might protest.

"Relationships... at least for humans, can be... quantum things."

She looking down, gathering his thoughts, but he's completely leaned in and engaged, focused on her.

And I love the body language, here, because they both have their arms crossed in front of them as protection. Christine's is a harder overlap to shore up her armor, but Spock's is still there. Some part of him recognizes she might break his heart.

"Think about Schrodinger's cat. They exist or they don't, they don't, depending on who's observing them." "That is-" "Not how quantum superposition actually works? *chuckles* Yeah, I know."

I love how evenly matched they are in this conversation. She understands him enough to know where his literal mind might be misinterpreting her signals.

And she doesn't get frustrated with him. She chuckles to herself, and redirects to ensure he understands her meaning.

I spend so much of my life doing this with my Middle son, and I hope someday he meets a partner as patient and understanding as Christine has demonstrated on this show.

"It's a metaphor, Spock. A messy one. Just like... whatever this is."

It's Spock's time to be deflating and suddenly become obsessed with the texture of the table. It's not the answer he'd hoped to hear. Because while he went into the conversation without expectation, he did go in with hope.

"My point is, if we let Starfleet, or anyone else, for that matter, look inside the box then..." "Our quantum... cat might disappear?"

I. Laughed. So. Hard. It's the delivery. The arched eyebrows on "cat" and how seriously he says it. It's so bloody brilliant, but it had me absolutely rolling.

"I'd just as soon let it live. See how big it grows."

And we're back to bedroom eyes. Because while it's not the answer he hoped to hear, she's not rejecting him. She doesn't want to end things. She simply wants to continue on without defining it.

And this has the potential to be so bad for both of them. But, at least she's being honest. That's part of her whole quest with this relationship, right? Be more honest?

"Your move."

She winks at him. Because she just set out the expectations and wants on his side. It's up to him to decide if he wants to continue as they are, or report them to Starfleet and risk losing it all, or whatever third option is likely to occur.

We don't see the pair of them together after this scene, but I think we have a really good idea of where they are—they want different things and they're pretending they don't.

I've been there. My first boyfriend wanted way different things than me. But, I really liked him and I wanted to stay with him. Until he cheated on me and it all spiraled really badly.

We have foreknowledge that Spock and Christine don't, so that filters the lens through which we view the scene.

But if we look strictly at their wants in this scene alone, it's clear they're trying to head in the same direction while not understanding one is looking through a microscope, and the other a telescope. Technically, the same direction... but not the same view.

"Those Old Scientists" AKA "Spock's in a Phase"

Let me say up top that I did not expect that much Spapel in the cross-over episode. I told Matthew as soon as it hit the app, and we made the kids watch with us. My Middle told me it was his favorite episode of Star Trek ever.

Also, I'll admit Spock's experimentation with humanity as seen via's Boimler's perspective was jarring. I was simply not expecting it, and I admit I cringed as much as Boimler.

And while it was super effective, a part of me wishes we could've seen it from Christine and Spock's perspective (or anyone who wasn't seriously weirded out by it).

And, yes, this was all used as an illustrative tool to show that our visions of our heroes often differ greatly from the actuality, especially if we try to capture the whole of their lives based on a single point in time. Star Trek: First Contact investigates this concept extensively.

But in the microcosm of Spapel, it'd be fun to investigate what Christine thinks of Spock's increased leaning into his humanity, and even what Spock thinks of it.

Christine Spots Spock

I love how she spots him from across the room and immediately has to excuse herself.

"I have to go."

As soon as Christine says it, Erica looks over her shoulder to see where her friend's headed.

Spock is beaming when he sees her. Oh my goodness, he's so happy. This time (and I didn't remember this initial shot from my first viewing since I was doing it with a 5-year-old crawling over my lap and two 8-year-olds asking repeated questions), the shot is quite lovely!

Christine's striding over to her man, and she's so bloody happy to see him, too. Of course, it's the setup for the heartache to come, but I kinda wish we could bottle this moment where they both feel so damn content with who they are with one another.

"All I know is where I come from, he is legendary for never smiling, laughing, definitely no joking. And that Spock goes on to do really important things that I very much need to have not messed up."

Oh, Boimler. He's let La'an's words get into his head (because he takes the letter of rule so bloody seriously) and now he's unloading on an unsuspecting Christine.

"I'm worried because I made Spock laugh. And I keep wondering, is that a butterfly effect? 'Cause the Spock I know shouldn't have done that." "Maybe he's just... going through a thing. Like, having fun." "No, but I've read every book about Spock and they-they mention his upbringing on Vulcan, his pet sehlat, his relationship with his mom and dad, but nothing about a happy, smiley, jokey guy, period." "Just stop. Stop, stop, stop."

Boimler has no idea how to keep his mouth shut... or the pain he's inflicting. Because Christine now knows she doesn't make any of the Spock history books. They don't make it.

And. That. Hurts. Much as Christine doesn't see herself as a "relationship" person, she's already crossing so many lines with Spock. Some she may notice and brush off, but others I doubt she's aware of, yet.

Spock is on her ship. We know with Dever the last thing she wanted to do was transfer to his ship. She and Spock actually linger in public together and hang out, play games, chat.

They're not just shacking up and only shacking up. There's a relationship at play, here—a give-and-take.

"None of this is your fault, okay. Spock was acting like this before you arrived."

Excuse me? Excuse me!? He wasn't doing it last episode, so how long has this bloody relationship been going on?!

"Oh, thank God. So this is, what, this is just, like, a phase? And-and, he'll get over it and back to his, like, serious, real self soon?"

I think it's "just a phase" that crushed her. Look at the tears in her eyes. Because, deep down, she doesn't want this to be "just a phase" for either of them.

But, as far as history knows, they never existed. That is what Boimler just told her. Not that she's a footnote in Spock's history. Not that they burned out. They. Never. Existed.

And that's what she wanted last week, right? To keep Starfleet and everyone else out of it? But is that what she really wants? I would argue Christine doesn't know what she wants.

But this hurts like hell.

"Oh. You're the one who's been influencing him, not me. I-I shouldn't have said anything."

He regrets it. He regrets everything. But, it's too late. He can't take it back.

And her realization that he's put two-and-two together is so... her. She's almost embarrassed he knows, because she doesn't want anyone to know.

Although I'm sure all her besties know... they're simply too polite to say anything (most of the time... I'm looking at you, Erica).

"No. It's, it's fine. I never assumed that I would... get to influence him forever, anyway."

She start off fine, but by the end of the sentence, she's tearing up, again. She looks away.

"Don't even want that."

That's right, Christine. Keep telling yourself that. And, I gotta offer mad props to Jess Bush, as usual, because he inflection is everything on this.

Some folks get a line and look at it, and they give one read that's flat without emphasis, or the emphasis is in a predictable spot. From the beginning, I've noted how creative Jess Bush is in her choices, and I'm just so blown away by her.

She took a character that wasn't really my favorite (I was a McCoy gal) and turned her into my favorite character of Strange New Worlds.

And, yes, I fully credit the Writers (go WGA!) with the blueprint presented to her. But, I'm mad impressed with her performance every episode. It's so nuanced and alive.

When Boimler leaves, she's alone with her thoughts. And while she's been telling herself for so long that it's not what she wants, it sucks to feel like the option doesn't even exist anymore.

With Schrodinger's cat, the not knowing is part of it, right? Now, she knows.

And, y'know, I'd like to also point out that history books don't know everything. I'm writing a script based on my grandparents. Trust me, there's a lot that's not going on the page for a variety of reasons.

I once heard the expression, "History is written by the victor". And, it's true. So much of history is omitted from what we know.

A few years ago, one of the books I homeschooled my children with was about Black soldiers during the Revolutionary War who defected to the English side. This is our national history of which I was entirely unaware.

We're still discovering more history all the time that was omitted or hidden. Which feeds into my prediction that, perhaps, there's a logical reason why Spock and Christine erased themselves from each other's lives.

I won't get into my predictions in the middle of the Meta, but skip to the end if you want my (completely uninformed) thoughts.

"Ensign Boimler, Nurse Chapel told me about your exchange."

Oh, shit. But, seriously, I'm so proud of my girl, Christine, for talking to her not-boyfriend.

Go with me, here: What is something Christine sucks at? Communication. She just isn't the best, especially at communicating her own wants and needs. Erica pointed it out to her with Devers, and also tried to help guide her towards trying to be better.

Christine, despite finding out they're doomed, communicated with Spock. I'm so bloody proud.

"She did not go into detail, but it was easy to extrapolate that there was something you told her about my future. Perhaps, I should know." "Nah."

Boimler is trying so hard not to do anymore damage.

But was this always supposed to happen? Look, most time-travel episodes change the past or try not to change the past. But, in this case, I'd argue these events were necessary, in a cyclical manner.

I mean, Pike would've gone in guns blazin' with the Orions if not for Boimler. It might've seemed revisionist, at first, but then it came around at the end to be exactly what needed to happen.

"It does not take an expert observer to recognize that my experiments in human emotion trouble you. Therefore, I must surmise my future state, the one you are familiar with, must be one in which my emotions are minimized." "Must you surmise that?"

Boimler is begging him to stop understanding him. Which is bloody hilarious, because Boimler would honestly prefer for Spock not to be so damn observational and rational and good as suppositions.

"But you did say something to Christine that upset her."

There it is. He hasn't referred to her as Christine on-screen since he was fully human. And I know it's a little thing, but I'm grateful it's here. Because we know, now, without a doubt, that he's truly concerned about her.

He drops the professionalism in that sentence. He's speaking as a concerned not-boyfriend, and it's so heartbreaking knowing it all ends in tears.

Am I hoping at least there's a satisfying reason besides, "You're meant to be something else, so we're doomed, so I'm going to be Korby's research assistant because he personally invited me"? Golly, yes. But, that's up to the writers, and I'm along for the ride.

"Look, all I said was that I'm surprised that you're so... human. Yes, the universe needs Vulcan Spock if everything that I know happens... happens." "And yet I have no choice but to stay true to the path I have chosen in this time. If you sway me, then my future will have been altered. Is that not logical?" "Unfortunately, it is."

That isn't all you said, Boimler. But, I love this peek into Spock's mindset. He's going to see this through. Whereas Christine is now feeling unsteady, Spock is more resolved than ever.

They are such very different people, but that can be sensational relationally, as well. My husband and I intersect in interest and temperament in some ways, and diverge greatly in others. It definitely keeps things interesting.

But until Christine and Spock are clearly communicating, their differences remain possibilities for upheaval.

"Do you feel lucky?"

Well? Do ya, punk? I mean, has Christine introduced Spock to Dirty Harry? Or did he pick that one up at movie night?

SIDE NOTE: I love just how many series of Star Trek have a movie night... as if a subtle reminder that even as technology changes and morphs, we still love to return to a good picture show for entertainment and comfort.

While this isn't Spapel-related, I have to call out that I loved them referencing Enterprise, the show. While neither of my favorite characters got a mention (Trip/T'Pol), it's good to see the acknowledgement and the connection.

That whole scene of turning the current Enterprise crew into super fans talking about their heroes was so well done. A reminder that none of us is immune to a little hero worship and awe... and that it's not a bad thing.

We simply need to remember that these people are still people, and that even if we've read every book available, we still don't know their whole story. Some things don't make the history books.

At the end of the episode, they're all animated, and I have to applaud whoever picked up on the fact that Christine does not know how to sit in a chair normally. I mean, in "Lost in Translation" she had one hand between her legs while swiveling at the table.

It's a small detail, but I immediately cheered when I saw it because the characterization was on point.

Alright, before I talk about Future Spock and Christine, I need to address something that really got me: Boimler and Mariner talking to Pike about his birthday.

My father has already lived past his father's age at death. My mother has lived past her mother's, and next year will live past her father's. It's poignant.

But I also love how Boimler points out that the regret Pike feels might be shared by those who love him.

Now, I don't think anyone should be convinced out of doing something that brings them joy, but I am glad they helped steer him toward community. As we saw last Meta, connection is one of Starfleet's greatest gifts.

And having just lost Cheryl a month ago, I'm thinking about how I really treasure all our little moments, even as she was reaching the end. Connection is such a powerful thing.

Also, I genuinely teared up at the Orion Scientist finding out they'd attribute the discovery to him. There is so much prejudice in this world where one sector of a society does something unsavory, and suddenly anyone belonging to that society is seen as undesirable.

It's bullshit, and it needs to stop. Because assumptions like that can literally get people killed. And to see that Orion watch as a man of Starfleet chose to see them for who they were, and was even willing to help write the history that would tell their truth... that was powerful.

Now, let's talk Future Spock and Chapel.

WARNING: Will contain spoilers for the episode AFTER next based on the promo!!

I think it's going to either completely unravel, or start to badly deteriorate next episode. My prediction is that Christine publishes her paper and Korby is so impressed he invites her to Vulcan not as a student, but as his research assistant.

This allows us to stay very close to canon without making it a creepy teacher/student relationship.

Also, I think she's going to find out she's in and sing a big heart song (thank you Zoey's Extraodinary Playlist) about it, but Spock's going to overhear something she never meant to say.

There might be a sad duet sung by the two of them, either in separate rooms, or together. But, we're heading towards a breakdown, in my opinion.

And while I'm sad to see it, it's inevitable, right? Unless they rewrite canon or give us some sneaky way these two reunited in their old age, we know how this story goes.

Whether we'll see them together in Season 3 remains to be seen, of course, but I really hope so.

Why? Because I like to imagine the reason they stay apart is because they're protecting someone or each other... that it was a shared and conscious decision by both of them to do what was necessary for the greater good.

Not because they didn't love one another (though I don't think Christine will admit it until TOS), but because they had to make a hard sacrifice.

That's so bloody Star Trek—people making sacrifices for the greater good.

Yes, I'd love to see these two crazy kids sort it out... but that's not their story. Are there a million possibilities out there that canon could support? Heck, yeah! It can still be a compelling story, even if it's a tragedy.

Think about Shakespeare. All those folks turning out to see his tragedies as much as his comedies—because the stories he told moved people.

Christine and Spock, you beautiful, doomed dears. I wish you much happiness, though I know it won't be possible the way you might've hoped.

#Strange New Worlds #Star Trek Strange New Worlds #Star Trek SNW #Spock #Christine Chapel #Nurse Chapel #Jess Bush #Ethan Peck #Meta #Spapel

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stellasvault · 1 year

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I’m not exactly sure where to go for requests so I’m gonna assume this is okay (I’m new to making requests 😭😭😭) but we all know that Miles grew up in New York and loves the culture there and I just think it would be really funny if he had a girlfriend who was from a very rural southern area and she isn’t used to city life at all. Idk just a silly little thing that popped into my head that I think was cute

ur in the right place don’t worry!! also ur right this is such a funny idea i love it, thank u for requesting! 💜

“sorry, i’m not a city gal”

pairings: 1610!miles morales x fem!reader

warnings: sfw, reader and miles are kinda in a long distance relationship

you loved miles, you really did. you loved everything about him.

his adorable cheeky smile when he was genuinely happy, the way he awkwardly held your hand when he was feeling clingy. there was just one thing you didn’t understand:

how did he live in such a large and loud place?

you had grown up in a country area where everyone was spread out and cars were consistently used to go basically.. everywhere. so it was definitely a change when you first arrived in brooklyn with no idea where you were going. you were fresh out the train, dusting yourself off and adjusting your headphones.

you already didn’t like this place. did people seriously just be this disrespectful and live with it? chewed gum and stickers blanketed the walls and ground, and you swore you heard the sound of tiny feet scurrying. rats? blegh, you didn’t even want to think about it.

ok.. you thought, just find his apartment, and walk up to his floor. that’s it. you reassured yourself, looking at your cell to remind yourself of the directions.

it took lots of turns, retracing your steps, and asking strangers who had no interest in you, but you made it. you looked up at the tall building blanketed in graffiti.

what if they talk in city slang and i don’t understand? you panicked, biting your freshly-manicured nails. or what if miles decides he wants to break up?! you got yourself even more riled up with your horrible scenarios, fidgeting with your phone.

your panicking was interrupted by your phone’s familiar ringtone, vibrating in your palm. you picked up, still nervous. you perked up as you heard the voice you loved so much: the voice of your boyfriend, miles.

“mi amor, you okay?” he spoke into the phone, obviously anxious to talk to you.

you smiled at his usual awkward reaction. “yeah miles, i’m fine. what’s up?” your visit had been planned for days, carefully organized so that it would fit both of your schedules.

he sighed. “my parents, they won’t let us go out until they talk to you…” he trailed off apologetically, knowing talking to rio and jeff could be a challenge.

you gasped sharply. again?! what do they want this time? you thought to yourself, ridden with fear.

“hey, i can feel you being nervous from all the way over here!” he laughed into the speaker, it was almost like you could hear his stupid grin. “it’s fine. they just want to make sure you’re ‘respectful’ or whatever.” he reassured you.

you felt a smile tugging at your lips, your boyfriend was too adorable for his own good. you sighed in a mockingly dramatic way. “fine, if you insist.” you heard him mutter ‘yes!’ in victory, making you giggle.

“see you soon?” he asked rhetorically.

“soon.” you repeated excitedly, before rushing up the stairs of the apartment.

—————————————————————————

the last hour had been a blur of sweating nervously, having laughing attacks, and sneaking tight squeezes of the hands when mrs. morales & captain morales weren’t looking. you couldn’t even count the amount of times mrs. morales had corrected you on her and her husbands names.

you now sat at the top of the apartment. it was dark, but the lights of the city illuminated the sky beautifully. miles had shared this was one of his favorite places to think, his favorite place, however, was where his late uncle told him how to spray paint.

“it can’t be that bad!” miles laughed, playfully shoving your shoulder.

you sucked your teeth. “i’m afraid it is that bad.” you placed the piece of scrap paper even closer to your chest, making sure it was completely hidden.

“if you show me, i swear i’ll show you my sketches!” he promised, waving around his chunky sketchbook in his hand.

you debated whether not to give in, all the outcomes running through your head. but, the lingering curiosity got to you, you knew you had no choice.

“if you laugh, all those precious figures of yours are going straight out of the packaging.” you warned him with gritted teeth. the anger you showed was hiding your plain anxiousness. miles absolutely adored art, you knew that. but what if yours wasn’t good enough?

he shrugged, confident that he wouldn’t let out a single chuckle. you slowly turned around the white paper to reveal a sketch of miles. in the picture, a slight smile was tugging at his lips, and his eyes seemed to shine through the paper somehow.

he almost immediately tugged the portait into his hands, observing it silently. “wow..” was all he could say.

you squirmed slightly. all his face showed was that he was definitely focused, but did he like it?

“mami, this is amazing.” he turned his head to look at you in awe, but his expression showed he was getting a burst of energy. “how did you hide this from me? you always insist you never want to draw, but there’s no way you’re bad at this!” he laughed, grabbing one of your hands with his free one.

you tried to decipher whether he was just trying to be nice or if he was being honest.

“so let’s see that sketchbook.” you smirked. his face scrunched up in anger.

“i hate you..” he muttered under his breath as he flipped through his book.

“and i love you.” you cupped his face and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

—————————————————————————

AHHHH I LOVE MILES ☹️☹️

thanks for reading! likes and reblogs mean the literal world to me <3

•☘️☘️☘️

#across the spiderverse #atsv x reader #miles morales #earth 42 miles x reader #miles morales fluff

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camp-counselor-life · 6 months

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Ok, so I had an anxiety attack last night on a date and I'm trying to parse out what happened and my mental state. Is anxiety often irrational? Yes, and this definitely was. But also I feel like this would give neurotypical people anxiety, so justified? IDK.

TW: ableism

So here goes. The gal I am dating invited me to a gymnastics meet. Now, I love gymnastics (our shared university has an excellent team) and haven't been to a meet in eons, so I agreed. Did not think it through, just said yes. In the back of my brain, I knew there could be some issues, but dammit, let's just stuff those down and pretend.

I show up at her apartment nearly 10 minutes earlier than we agreed. She informs me that she thinks they have a clear bag policy (at all times, I carry a large black purse with all the stuff in it). We look and it says you can bring a purse. So cool, we will see if they'll let it in.

Now we're driving and there's traffic (the team is a big deal). And we're struggling to find a place to park (I had suggested we take the train bc that's how much I hate traffic and parking). We park somewhere that I am not 100% sure is allowed, but we're like 99.5% sure. This fact will come back later.

We get to the door. The man informs me my purse is too big. In a moment of panic, where I am about to be separated from my meds and inhaler, I inform him that it's got medical equipment in it, something my date does not know and this of course reveals that I have some sort of disability where I cannot be separated from the contents of my purse. He gives me a special tag and I get to take my bag in.

At this point, my date (who is aware I am autistic but nothing else) could be thinking one of two things: I have lied because I want to bring my purse in or I have some sort of shameful medical condition bad enough to require a purse-full of items I didn't tell her about. Both run through my head along with the thought of "I am going to hell, did I just lie to bring in my purse?" and it's not a lie, I do need to drag that stuff around, but also I probably could have made it 2.5 hours without it. I also decided that this would be a good way to phrase my discomfort to several friends, all of whom were like what?

We sit down and at this point I am so anxious and uncomfortable and ashamed that I barely talk the entire meet. It is also extremely loud, crowded, and the guy behind me is wearing strong cologne. We make small talk and hold hands, which I think was fine.

In the fourth (and final) session of the meet, probably almost 1.5 hours in, I have finally calmed down enough to enjoy myself. The shame is still there, and I don't know how to fully explain this to people, so I'm writing about it on tumblr for y'all to ignore.

So, what does this mean? I am probably not as "at peace" with my disabilities as I thought. The shame is real and strong and I feel like I could have had so much better of an experience if I had just done something differently. It's my fault.

And then I had a nightmare about the stadium last night, so that was like the cherry on top.

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altocat · 2 years

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Not sure if you've done this, so sorry in advance. If Sephiroth had a child, but the mother didn't make it, what would a child raised by only Sephiroth act like? Lets say a daughter because that brings up more inherent mommy issues. I'm talking both sane and insane Sephiroth.

I know your headcanon for sane him is being in love with Genesis, but for the sake of the prompt, I'll assume Hojo pulled some NASTY tricks. Insane Sephiroth is trying to create a new world, and I'm 99% sure he does not want to raise a remnant after how they turned out.

Sephiroth doesn't want to be a father. The damage done to him throughout his life has made him exceedingly disturbed at the idea of repeating the cycle. He feels that he isn't emotionally equipped enough to handle it, and is terrified of the idea of his own blood being brought up in the labs the way he was.

Now, should Hojo do something particularly nasty and succeed in breeding Sephiroth...

-If there's no mother at all, Sephiroth has to make a choice. His duty to Shinra or knowing that Hojo will torture his offspring for the rest of her natural life, conditioning and corrupting her little by little.

-At first, Sephiroth spends the first few years completely detaching, ignoring his guilt, trying to remain loyal and avoiding it completely. But when he finally sees her again, now a fragile wobbly toddler behind the glass, he can't bear it. It's the first time he's genuinely, completely enraged and angry, breaking through his calm facade just to get to her, killing Hojo without hesitation, taking the child and running. If Sephiroth was ready to leave Shinra over his friends, he would have burned the place to the ground over his child.

-As a father, Sephiroth is distant and not very communicative. He doesn't like to share his emotions and he isn't good at playing or doting or doing anything a healthy father should. He is often leaving her in safe spots and will disappear for long periods, only coming back with food or when it's time for bed. He will purchase whatever is required to keep her well cared for, but he honestly has no idea how to express the traditional feelings of paternal love that most fathers provide. He WANTS to. And the feelings are there deep down. But he is completely at a loss.

-It's only after they've been together for a while that Sephiroth finally begins to learn little by little. He might not ever be a physically affectionate father, but he begins to provide her with gifts, toys. He tries to express himself when he can, and would fight to the death to keep her safe. In rare instances, his hollow mask shatters and she can see just how tired and anxious he really is. It takes many years before he is finally able to tell her that he loves her.

-By the time he's raised her to adulthood, they're much much closer. She understands him very well and he's much more relaxed by then. Sephiroth is more at peace far away from Shinra. And is low-key constantly following his daughter wherever she goes. She finds it quietly amusing. He's still so awkward, and lots of what he says around her is blisteringly aloof and stilted. But she doesn't doubt that he really does love her, and is devoted to her.

-She probably would grow up a bit more mature than other kids her age. And due to Sephiroth being Sephiroth, would probably be well versed in self-defense and reading others when they can't really verbalize. I don't think she'd be especially powerful or important or sue-ish. I like the idea of Sephiroth's child being Just Some Gal. Wise, thoughtful, pragmatic, and thankfully living a normal, boring, uneventful life with no Main Character higher purpose or trauma. Sephiroth would greatly prefer that.

-Because I'm mean, I'd like to think she very strongly resembles Lucrecia hehehehe...

-ANYWAY Insane!Sephiroth just wants to see what's in it for him. Otherwise, he'd find a nice little nook and dump her off. He'll come back once she's an adult and can be useful to Jenova's cause. Other than that, she is of little use to him.

#Sephiroth #Sephcanons #AU #Ffvii #Ff7 #Hojo #Jenova #Final Fantasy 7 #Asks #Writing #Seph the dad #Father of the year #crisis core

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darkesttimelinejeffparker · 2 years

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Last thoughts for the night, when I met Hangman on Sunday, I talked to him and also handed him a note that told him how much he meant to me.

It included that just prior to the pandemic, I'd been hospitalized and told I was lucky to be alive only for the world to shut down shortly after and people to suddenly debate why they had to wear a mask for something only affecting "sick or old people." Add to the top of that my often crippling anxiety and living alone/working from home, and suddenly I was more isolated than ever and feeling like the world didn't care if I lived or died.

Then my best friend, my good time gal, Aims, told me to watch AEW, we used to watch WWE and talk about it despite being on opposite coasts. This not only rebuilt a super strong connection with her (friends for a decade and talking every day), encouraged me to write, and made me feel less alone. In the letter, I told him that I felt less alone because I saw myself in him -- in everything -- in his openness about being anxious, in celebrating his victories and mourning his defeats. I told him that the line "the medication isn't working, but I'm still here" made me reach out to my family, confess that I wasn't doing well, and ask for help finding a new psychiatrist.

But I also told him it made me feel less alone because I found a lot of other fans, a lot of people who also connected with him and with AEW, and that I considered those people friends. Those people are you guys. All of us reaching out to each other tonight and being kind are a big part of what has made wrestling so fundamental to me after years of having felt chased off from the fandom years ago after some bad experiences. (fuck the haters and the bird app)

Anyway, I wasn't really going to share all of that. But tonight I decided to because I love you all and you mean so much to me -- more than I can ever express or even usually do express because I am not great about it -- though I try to tell you guys how much I appreciate you whenever I can, interacting at all sometimes gets me flustered.

So thank you. Whether we connected because you liked my stories or my insane liveblog takes or I loved your gifs or your blog name made me laugh or we just randomly came together and vibed, you mean so much to me.

#amanda talkie post

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hatchetsfield-arch · 3 months

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🍓 pls love me icon

@mutuals send me a 🍓 and ill compliment u!

FRANKIEE!!!!! you absolute sweetheart of a human being! i remember way back when on my old multi, i had made a post talking about the frustration i get as an autistic + anxious gal wanting / trying to make friends, how it can be incredibly hard for me to do so and the isolation i felt with it. and then you come along - popping right into my IM’s and saying ‘hey lets be friends!’ and striking up conversation. i will never be able to properly express just how much that meant, means, to me. as well as just - when we reconnected on this blog, you asking how i was doing in relation to things that had last been discussed like over a year ago just blew my mind with the kindness and compassion!!!

ALSO, i MUST talk about your characterizations and writing!!!! i was and still am (and always will be) blown away at your portrayal of jane - how much love and care and thought you put into her. how you’ve truly fleshed her out in her personality, background and complexities - honestly the d*ffer bros need to hand over their rights to you you’ve earned them fair and square with all the love and craft you pour into her. as well as your portrayal of the doctor???!!!! two wildly different characters and you nailed them both so perfectly, right down to their tone and mannerisms.

AAAND bonus - plotting!!!! i adore plotting with you so much, i love how lengthy we get and how excited we both get to add on and share!!! it’s so much fun!

#i adore you!!!#and i will always so appreciate you just popping in my IM’s and saying ‘let’s be friends’#i’m so grateful to be able to call myself your friend and so grateful we were able to reconnect!!!!!

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musecaravan-info · 1 year

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About Me

I’m actually not all that comfortable sharing stuff about myself with strangers on the internet. I come from a generation where we were taught that wasn’t a good idea (and I still prescribe to that.)

If you need a name to call me, Mira is fine. So is Jo, I guess. But I’ll answer to ‘Hey there, you!’

Just to give you a teeny bit of info:

I’m old - well, older than most of you, at least. If that weirds you out, jump ship NOW. I don’t have the time (or the grace) to deal with people who can’t handle having friends that aren’t the same age they are.

I’m a librarian by trade (yes, I have a Masters degree and everything) and a writer by hobby.

I like fantasy (especially urban), and anime, and cartoons, and audiobooks, and casual gaming, and all kinds of music.

Now that you know as much as any stranger really has a right to know - let’s cover a few RP-related things. These are also in the guidelines, but because these are probably the ‘deal-breaker’ type things, it can’t hurt to go over them more than once (and in more detail.)

These are good ways to decide if we’ll work well as partners.

My replies are slower than dirt. No, really. While I try to keep it to about 3-4 months between, I’ve been known to go 6-9 months. I’m a ‘slow burn’ kind of gal. If you want to stick with me for that, then awesome. If not, I understand.

I am not a fan of constantly dropped threads. I don’t mind a thread that takes YEARS to finish, but if we are ALWAYS starting things and you are always dropping them, then I will eventually stop starting things with you. It’s that simple. My time is limited (which is WHY it takes me so long to reply) and if you’re consistently dropping our threads and our replies never go anywhere, then you’re wasting my time. I know that sounds harsh, but I’m tired of having it happen. If you do this, and you have partners that don’t care, then I’m glad for you. However, I DO care and we aren’t going to make good partners.

I rarely (if ever) approach first anymore. This really only applies to people I haven’t written with yet. No, I’m not shy or anxious or whatever. I’m just tired of approaching people and having them act like they want to RP, and then having them drop the thread two replies in (or never replying at all.) I’m basically tired of people saying yes because they’re afraid to say no. If YOU ask ME, then, when I say yes, I know we’re both interested in doing something together.

I need partners who can COMMNUNICATE with me. If you’re too scared or anxious or shy (or whatever) to do that, then we probably won’t make good partners. I’ve been ghosted in the past by a partner who was too afraid of her own shadow to have an adult conversation, and I’m not interested in being in that situation again. I am an understanding and down-to-earth person, and if you treat me with respect, I will offer you the same in return no matter what we’re talking about.

I don’t like being constantly passed over. If you’re the kind of RPer who’s always playing favorites, then we’re not going to make good partners. And I’m not talking an ‘every now and then’ sort of thing. I get that some days you just want to write that one thing. Or some days the short stuff is easy and the long stuff is hard. I’m talking about if we’ve got RPs going and you reply EVERY day to other people, but ALL of our threads sit on your back-burner for months at a time collecting dust. That’s not okay with me. Again - this is tied to some poor treatment I’ve received in the past. I put up with it back then because I thought the person in question was a friend who would talk to me if there was an actual issue. Turns out she wasn’t a friend. She was just a coward. I refuse to put myself in a similar situation again. Treat me this way on a regular basis and I will drop our threads and not look back.

I’m not very chatty. Not in real life and not online. If you talk to me, then I will talk back. I will never intentionally ignore you. And I promise you’re not being annoying or a burden or anything like that. I like hearing from people, I’m just crap when it comes to instigating conversations. I rarely go out of my way to have non-RP related conversations with people. I’m sorry; it’s just how I am. :(

I know these things may make me seem bitchy and stand-offish. I can’t really help that. I’m sorry. :( I’m just tired of dealing with issues related to these things over and over again. If I say it in the beginning, then we can both avoid wasting each others’ time. If you don’t like any or all of what you see here, then it just means I’ve saved us both a lot of time and frustration. If you think you’re okay with all of the above, then please proceed to my guidelines to learn more. :)

Also, please be aware - if you’re a current partner and your anxiety has you worried that you might be doing something from the above list, please don’t worry. <3 If you were (and it was bothering me) I would politely say something. I believe 100% in communication, and if something is wrong I’ll come talk to you about it. If I haven’t said anything, you’re fine - I promise. :) If you’re still worried about it, and would like to come talk to me, please do! Communication goes both ways, and I’m here to listen and to reassure as best I can.

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parisofpeoplez · 3 years

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Now that it has been almost 24 hours since I watched the Vincenzo finale and have had some time to process things, I have....a lot to say apparently. I was typing out my thoughts about the last ep and when I wrote the Chayenzo part I realized that this is way too much word vomit for a single post lol. So here are my thoughts on one of my fav on screen couples ever.

Chayenzo have my whole heart!❤ Ahhh I've rooted for them so much and held out hope till the VERY end! I'm not particularly pleased with the open(ish) ending. With all that's going on around us, I specially look for comfort in the media I consume nowdays and I've always been a sucker for happy endings. And you can't blame me to expect an idealistic end after they literally had a flock of pigeons save Vincenzo like come on! Don't talk about giving it a realistic end when some of the things they've pulled off in this show is batshit crazy! But, it is what it is and I can work with what they gave us...

I'd like to believe that their love is strong enough that they will eventually find their way back to each other. They have witnessed and embraced each other's best and worst parts, they've fought a war together, and in doing so have found comfort and friendship in one another that has slowly evolved into love. They aren't interdependent, they are both strong and independent individuals. They don't need to be with each other, but want to and that desire is strong enough for them to eventually find a way to be together.

I love that they played I'm always by your side for this scene. While Is this love had been their song throughout the show, it is more about them trying to understand and coming to terms with their feelings for each other. Whereas, I'm always by your side establishes that they are in love. It plays for the first time in ep 19 when Vincenzo returns. I believe after Cha Young's whole ~indirect confession~ to him, he realized that he is irrevocably in love with her and finally admitted his feelings to himself. Cha Young acknowledged her feelings when she saw him leaving in the airport (hence the whole One soul in two bodies conversation). They have both realised that they love each other and that is when we hear this ost for the very first time. Hence, this ost playing in the last kiss scene is also a confirmation of their love and Chayenzo endgame. Even when they are apart, they will always be by one other's side and will eventually find their way back to each other...

I know a lot of people wanted a direct confession from Vincenzo but honestly? I am extremely happy with what we got. When he says 'Villians never break up because they're tenacious, even when they're in love', not only was he saying that he loves her, but he also indirectly said that he will never stop loving her and I think that's even more beautiful than a direct 'I love you', especially for them because this is what their dynamic has always been. Never outright saying it, expressing their love in actions rather than words is how they express themselves. Cha Young asking Han-seok not to use her to lure Vincenzo and kill her instead, Vincenzo kneeling to save her life, Cha Young taking a bullet for him and Vincenzo shielding her with his body when he realises that Han-seok is about to shoot them......they are ready to die for each other!! Also, in saying this line, Vincenzo is telling Cha Young that he is not going to stop until he comes back to her! He is conveying a lot in just this one line, okay!

Yeah, I'm still v emotional about them, to the point that I probably won't be able to do a re-watch without having an emotional breakdown RN, knowing now what all go through. But! Hopefully I'll start a re-watch again sometime soon, after all this is one hell of a show and I want to see my Mafia dad and Villian mom destroy everyone once again!

#does any of thie make sense?#idk #i just wanted to vent out everything #to try and cope with post show withdrawl #there will be even more posts until I have vomited out everything that I want to say lol #tumblr is my safe space just let me have this #anxious gal shares her thoughts #long post #Vincenzo #hong cha young #chayenzo

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babyjakes · 2 years

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a little loud. [blurb.]

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

summary | bucky knows just how to help you when everything gets to be too much.

pairing | daddy!bucky barnes x little!reader

warnings | sfw regression (daddy!bucky little!reader), reader is overwhelmed/anxious/panicky, soft!bucky omg so so so soft, all those petnames he calls her :’-))), too cute might die lol

word count | 452

requested by @norsebunny | uk gal here. i’ve never sent a request before so i feel nervous but nevertheless,,, could i suggest an angsty but fluff ending of little!reader and daddy!bucky; reader feels anxiety and insecure often but it’s gotten particularly bad, but she doesn’t want to let it show so keeps it bottled up. she’s overly dutiful and bucky can see right through it and comforts her? not very original and you have so many amazing fics that there might be a similar one out there🤗

an | hey friend thanks so so much for this request yay i was hoping to write more soft!daddy!bucky hehe, i feel like he’s just the most observant and all-knowing daddy ever like as soon as his baby seems a little off, he’s on it like *that* – anyway, i hope you enjoy friend!

“Princess, what’s all this?” Bucky’s voice is almost dangerously soft as he stands before you in the kitchen, his concerned gaze shifting from the pile of dishes you’ve just cleaned to your trembling form.

Doing your best not to stutter, your words come out slowly as you try to formulate a believable reply, “I-I just-… I just thought I-… you-… thought y-you might want me to do them.”

Taking a step forward, the brown-haired man crouches down a few feet in front of you, his soft expression filled with worry. Struggling to catch your eyes with his own, he hums, “S'that so? Gee, doll, I’m sorry you felt like you had to do them all yourself. You should’ve come get me; you know Daddy’s always happy to do chores with you.”

Fighting back tears, you nod, your heart pounding almost painfully in your chest as your breaths begin to shorten. “I-I’m sorry, Daddy. Will c-come get you next time. I’m s-sorry,” you mumble your apology again.

“Hey,” he breathes, raising his brow gently at you with a gentle smile. “It’s okay, petal. Daddy’s not angry with you, not angry at all. You’ve been such a good girl for me, haven’t you? Got so much work done, think you deserve a special reward. What do you say?”

“R-reward?” you ask warily, your fingers twitching nervously at your sides.

“Mhmm. Maybe some ice cream? We’ve got a new tub of vanilla in the freezer,” the man offers, nodding his head towards the fridge. “You wanna make some sundaes and cuddle up for a movie?”

Swallowing down the lump in your throat, you do your best to nod firmly, quickly rushing to add, “Y-yes, thank you Daddy. That sounds so nice. I-I-…” But before you know it, despite the promise of the frozen treat and a film, a tear has still managed to make its way down your cheek, causing you to flinch back, wiping at it quickly as your cheeks begin to burn.

“Oh honey, it’s okay,” Bucky soothes, reaching out and pulling you into his arms. “Com'ere, babydoll. It’s okay. I’ve got you, sweetheart. You’re just overwhelmed, aren’t you, pumpkin? Brain’s gettin’ a little loud? That’s okay, sweets. Sometimes Daddy’s head gets loud and scary, too. I’m right here with you, bug. Let’s just take some deep breaths, hmm? Think you can show me what a good breather you are?”

Nodding into the safety of his shoulder, you begin to count along silently as Bucky guides your breathing, one of his hands finding your lower back and rubbing in slow, soothing circles.

“That’s it, bunny. Doin’ so good for me. Such a brave baby I’ve got, haven’t I? Always make me so proud.”

#eun's writing #a little loud #bucky barnes #daddy!bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #hurt/comfort #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes blurb #bucky barnes headcanon

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nestasgalpal · 3 years

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Dinner dates ch.2 [Gwynriel]

Nesta's Gal Pal Masterlist | Dinner Dates masterlist | AO3

Let me know if you want to be tagged!!

The restaurant Gwyn had picked was barely two blocks away from her apartment. She was familiar with the menu and found comfort in the fact that the music would be good while they ate.

Two minutes before the time they had agreed on meeting, Gwyn entered the place and a waitress asked if she had a reservation.

"I'm meeting with someone, the table is at his name."

She gave her Azriel's name. The waitress checked. "He is waiting for you."

Gwyn was impressed he had arrived even before her. The restaurant was nicely decorated, with warm indirect light, soft music and fresh flowers in every table. Azriel saw them approaching and got up. The waitress walked slower so he could circle the table and take the back of Gwyn's chair to help her sit.

"Thank you." She smiled at him, feeling her cheeks go red. His only answer was a gesture with his head and a confident half-smile, as the waitress started talking again, next to them.

"Here you go." The woman gave each of them a menu.

Although she took it, Gwyn already knew what she would order. She opened it to give Azriel some time and take the chance to check him out as he eyed his options. He was handsome, and Gwyn heard the little voice inside her give a high-pitched scream of proudness at her good eye, despite how drunk she had been the first time they met.

Tonight Azriel was wearing a well-fitted suit of a very deep shade of blue. It goes well with my hair, she thought. Gwyn fantasized about him sitting on his own black leather couch with two friends picking the best outfit the same way she had done. Don't wear that shirt, the cuff links will make it harder for her to take it off, they would say in her daydreaming.

"I will have the lamb." Azriel looked up from the menu and folded it closed. He didn't show it in his features, but Gwyn saw the smile in his hazel eyes, as if he had caught her staring. "Do you need more time?" He teased.

"I will have the yellow fin tuna." Gwyn closed hers and handled it to the waitress without taking her eyes from his.

It's not a competition, she considered saying. But it kind of was. Who arrived sooner. Who could decide faster what they wanted. Who would have the coolest anecdotes to share tonight. And she was into it.

"What will you be drinking?" As she took note of their orders, the waitress was discretely eyeing her date as well.

Oh, no. Gwyn realized she no longer had the list of options in her hands. Not that she knew anything about wines, but still... Azriel read the names in silence. She waited.

"Red or white?" He sounded so casual, so comfortable despite all her attempts to take him out of his comfort zone and into her territory...

"White for me. And water for you, right? It's not safe to drink and drive on your way back home..."

They had been talking about his motorcycle among other stuff this week. She knew he had driven here, just as he did know she lived two blocks away. Gwyn had every intention of taking him home tonight, but couldn't keep quiet, a little anxious by letting him have the upper hand.

His half restrained grin didn't go away, but his hazel eyes drifted up from the menu to meet hers, unbothered. "Are you flirting or asserting dominance?"

Still, he leaned in closer so she could read the options as well. Gwyn laughed softly, feeling her cheeks blushing. "Sorry."

Their heads were pretty close together, although not too much as to make it uncomfortable for the still standing waitress next to them. Or so Gwyn hopped.

Azriel didn't seem concerned about it. "May I pick the wine myself and impress you with my good taste, please?"

"I won't know the difference if you get us the worst one, anyway." she confessed.

"Even better."

After the first sip, Gwyn knew she had been wrong. Whatever he had ordered for them to drink, it was obviously good. She complimented it, and he returned an appreciative comment on the restaurant she had picked. She asked about his day, he asked about has last reading, and if she was interested in politics. She told him about how much she enjoyed hiking, accidentally initiating a long conversation about how curious it was that his favorite time of the year to go visit the mountains was, in fact, the winter, so he could ski. A family tradition, apparently.

"And I like the music here."

People left the restaurant as the time passed until they were the last couple in the room. It was late, but they couldn't stop talking. Well, she wouldn't -didn't want to, and he followed the conversation with ease. She lost track of time.

"Of course you do." she finished her glass of wine.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Gwyn leaned back against the chair and played with the corner of her napkin. "A mysterious journalist who drinks whiskey and listens to jazz music." She remembered the bottle he had in his apartment. He had offered a glass the night they met, and after she rejected it, he poured one for himself before following her into his bedroom. "Pretty cliché, if you ask me."

He raised an eyebrow. "Mysterious?" Azriel lifted his left arm to look at the time in his expensive watch. She rolled her eyes. Of course he used a watch instead of checking his phone. "I've talked about myself for three hours, Gwyn."

Perhaps it was the wine making her bolder, or maybe Gwyn had always been like that, but she put her elbows on the table to lean closer to him and gave him a teasingly innocent smile, "Then why do I feel like I have so much left to know?"

His only answer was to rise his arm. The right one this time, asking for the waitress, as he held her burning stare. He didn't even blink. "Can you bring us another bottle, please?" He asked when the woman arrived to the table.

"I'm afraid we are about to close, sir."

"Bring it anyway." Gwyn said. "We can drink it in my place."

Azriel was the one with the mischievous smile this time. "Alright. Then the bottle and the bill, please. I guess the lady and I have places to be."

#gwyn berdara #gwyneth berdara #gwyn acotar #gwynriel #gwyn x azriel #azriel x gwyn #gwynriel fanfiction #gwynriel fanfic #gwynriel fic

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oneprompt · 3 years

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Hello again! If you're not too busy then please let me request headcannons of how nami and robin would act around you when they're crushing on you (seperate). Male reader is preferred, but gender neutral is OK too! Thanks and see you later. Also how's university going?

authors note : hello <3 i hope you enjoy what i thought of <33 school has been... messy this week , to say the least. but ..! i'll try and conquer my negative feelings to catch up with everything here .. Heavens , im rambling..! please enjoy <3

How Nami Acts Near Her Crush Headcanons

• Nami isn’t too familiar with love, believe it or not. She may be a femme fatale but she’s clueless with genuine romance. I can imagine she’d try and ignore them, trying to push down and crush her feelings for you. Not that Nami is upset that it’s you who she loves! She just… has no clue what to do.

• She develops a crush really slow. Nami may be a young girl but growing up in such conditions, she never had thoughts of romance or dating. So, she isn’t used to crushes, nor the concept of romantic attraction. Nami never puts the time of day into thinking of others romantically, really. She’s a casual gal.

• She‘ll avoid you. Nami dislikes the warmness of her heart and how anxious she gets around you.. It feels so unnatural! She more then likely won’t confess, due to how prideful she is. Nami’s feelings will just be leaked out by her actions or her crew mates, she’ll never be so upfront about that .. it’s embarrassing!

• Nami gets flustered so easily. She snaps at you if you praise her skill or looks, acting all snarky and aggressive. It’s so so embarrassing to be called cute names by your crush….! Wouldn’t you agree?

• Shows affection through small actions when you’re unavoidable. Whether it’s through saving and teaming up with you during battles or patching you up after them, she shows her care in small waves.

• Nami is quick to anger if anyone asks about her odd behaviour around you, speculating the potential of her feelings. For lack of a better term, Nami is a tsundere … to a degree. Not that she’s too mean! She just… denies everything and yells at you a lot. But hey, who does Nami not yell at? • Her confession is a mess, if she is the one to confess. Nami does a lot of beating around the bush, not wanting to directly say, “im in love with you!” If you can’t catch onto her clues, she’s going to get very irritated. She’ll just shout out her feelings out of the flame of her anger. Nami cant hold back her shame as you finally soak in her feelings. She’ll completely avoid you for a few days, even if you returned the confession… Nami needs time to process it!

How Nico Robin Acts Near Her Crush Headcanons

• Robin has had her fair share of relationships but nothing too serious. She’s mature, she knows how to deal with feelings like an adult. Of course, Robin won’t be entirely open about it, what’s the need to?

• She’s not as shy about it as Nami. Robin wont hesitate to flirt with her crush, calling them cute, showering them in praises and giving them soft bits of physical affections. Robin is a natural flirt, she knows her beloved won’t suspect a thing…

• Robin is perfect at keeping her emotions under wraps. She runs more off of brains then heart, as she’s been relying on strategy more then relationships her entire life. She doesn’t fall for people easily, as she’s very hesitant with trusting another being, even just as a platonic bond. It takes her just as long to come out and tell them that.

• She doesn’t ever get flustered, not often at all. But if you praise Robin, she’ll get all shy. Robin will giggle nervously, cheeks going pink as she humbles herself from your praise. She can quite cute, can’t she?

• Robin acts more or less the same around you and the rest of the crew, despite the feelings she holds for you. As I said, she’s good at keeping her feelings to herself. Although, she may cave in and talk about you to one of her crew members, at least when she’s unsure about how she truly feels about you in the beginning.

• Her confession is rather simple. Robin doesn’t see it as a big deal, why overcomplicate it? There’s truly no point.. She’ll happily just exclaim her affections to you once she sees the time to befitted. Robin isn’t a huge romantic but she’s not clueless, she’s just… Robin. You know how she is. Robin would just simply pull you aside one day, giving you a simple, “I love you.” Its hard to believe her, with how simply she expresses her love. It’s a cute confession, yes… but rather blunt, wouldn’t you say?

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