#anyway no shade or anything but the kids really need to stop watching youtube

[scarah-screeeaaammss]

manager had his kid at work today and I know she's 4 but my GOD she is too much and she disrespected me in my own home so I have to throw the whole kid away

called my slimes "little poopies" and decided my lalaloopsy was poppy of that horrid poppys playtime HAAAATEEEEE

[robininthelabyrinth]

Hello! I saw a post that said your prompts are open, but if they’re not yet, please don’t worry about this. Anyway, if you’re interested, please take this ‘Wen Ruohan appoints Lan Wangji his next heir with being 1) impressed by him, or 2) bested by him’ Lan Wangji is less than thrilled about this

Modern AU

“I hate this,” Wei Wuxian grumbled. “This is so dumb.”

“I don’t think you’re supposed to enjoy being kidnapped,” Jiang Cheng said, his arms crossed over his chest. He was scowling. He hadn’t stopped scowling. Nobody blamed him one bit. “It’s not like it’s something that gets advertised in travel brochures or anything.”

“Listen, if it was like in the movies, it’d be one thing,” Wei Wuxian argued back. Lan Wangji suspected he was just arguing in order to hear himself speak, but since Lan Wangji also enjoyed hearing him speak, he didn’t mind. “Getting snatched into a van! Taken to a mysterious secondary location via plane! Villain monologues! Handcuffs! Zipties! Ropes! Chains!”

Lan Wangji wondered if Wei Wuxian had a thing for bondage. He would be okay with that.

Very okay with that.

“Wei Wuxian…” Jiang Cheng started.

“But noooooo, we don’t get jungles or the ‘most dangerous game’ or sexy people in skimpy swimsuits –”

Lan Wangji had a bathing suit. It wasn’t that skimpy, though.

“- we just get kidnapped by a deranged politician who’s decided that the best way to figure out who deserves to be his heir is via a stupid reality show!”

“I think it’s based on the Apprentice,” Nie Huaisang said from where he was sitting. “Possibly the Bachelor? I actually don’t watch that much reality television.”

“You watch the Great British Bake Off like a fiend,” Jiang Cheng pointed out.

“First, Great British Bake Off doesn’t count. Second, if this was a bake-off, your sister would win, instead of not even being here. Is that what you want?”

Both Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian shuddered.

“So, we’re all in agreement that the goal is to lose, right?” Wei Wuxian said. “No one actually wants the job of being Wen Ruohan’s heir, right?”

Nods all around.

“Doesn’t he have kids already?” Jin Zixuan wondered.

“Wen Xu and Wen Chao,” Lan Wangji said shortly.

“…yeah, fair, I’d be looking elsewhere too. They’re pretty awful – dumb and dumber. But surely there’s someone else in the family…?”

“I think they’ve been disowned. Anyway, who would want power if it means putting up with Wen Ruohan?”

Nods all around a second time.

“How will this work?” Nie Huaisang asked. “Are there, like – contests?”

There were.

Stupid ones.

Lan Wangji did his utmost best to mess up the archery competition – archery? In this day and age? – but he wasn’t quite willing to turn around and wildly shoot backwards the way Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng were doing, if only because the possibility of collateral damage made him shudder. He focused his arrows on a small corner just outside the target.

(Nie Huaisang’s arrows impressively did not reach the target even once. When asked how he had managed to pull that off despite being closely monitored to make sure he was actually trying, he proudly pointed to years of practice in fucking up his brother’s efforts at getting him to train.)

Lan Wangji was also incapable of getting a low score in the calligraphy competition, although Nie Huaisang shared in his misfortune there – being an artist did not necessarily translate to good penmanship, but in Nie Huaisang’s case it did – and naturally no one could quite compare to the atrocity that Wei Wuxian had created.

“It’s still recognizable as words, in my view,” Nie Huaisang declared after several minutes of close study. “So it should be fine to submit…you should really consider taking up abstract art, though. It’s quite nice, from that perspective.”

“Thank you,” Wei Wuxian said. “I think. Or was that an insult?”

The mathematics segment was even more disastrous for Lan Wangji – his uncle had brought him up with a strict prohibition against lying, including on test answers – and then they’d brought out music…

They didn’t even give Lan Wangji a chance to sabotage his chance, opting to just play a Youtube clip of one of his public performances on the guqin.

He was very, very good at guqin.

At least they’d done the same for Wei Wuxian and his flute – he ended up getting ranked first in music, even above Lan Wangji – but that wasn’t going to be enough to overcome his middle-of-the-road performances in the other subject.

“I think you’re going to win,” Jiang Cheng told Lan Wangji. “I’m very sorry. Seriously, and without sarcasm: I’m very, very sorry.”

Lan Wangji said nothing, but apparently his face managed to convey his misery effectively enough because Wei Wuxian came over and gave him a hug.

Lan Wangji enjoyed the hug, at least.

“Don’t worry,” Nie Huaisang said. He was fanning himself again – where did he even get a fan? Lan Wangji thought all three of the ones he’d seen Nie Huaisang pull out of his pockets had been confiscated, and surely there was a limit to how many “back-ups” a person plausibly needed – and reclining under the shade, having been thoroughly knocked out of the running during the physical portion of the competition. He hadn’t even had the courtesy to be concerned: he was, as always, secure in his uselessness. “We’ve been here for quite a while, haven’t we? Our families will be along soon enough to pick us up, and then we can forget all this.”

“What if they can’t, though?” Jiang Cheng said, wringing his hands. “I mean, we all hate him, he’s awful, yes, but he still has influence and power, for some unknown reason –”

“I still can’t believe there are people who support him. Least of all nearly half the cultivation world!”

“Less than half. Remember, we just counted.” 

“Yes, yes, I know, but still. Regardless, don’t worry – it’ll be fine.”

“Surely if our families were going to do something, they’d be here already?” Jin Zixuan asked.

Jiang Cheng pointed at him. “See? Even the peacock is worried!”

“Also, what if Wen Ruohan wants to keep Lan Wangji as his heir even after we’re rescued?” Wei Wuxian wanted to know. He looked worried, which Lan Wangji appreciated. “Listen, my future boyfriend and I are not going to live somewhere named something as classless and pretentious as the, and I quote, ‘Nightless City’, okay? I refuse.”

…future boyfriend?

“The Nightless City is a perfectly decent name,” Nie Huaisang said. “For a Bond villain. Which I’m not convinced Wen Ruohan isn’t.”

Boyfriend? As in – romantic partner boyfriend?

“A Bond villain wouldn’t be this stupid,” Jiang Cheng argued.

Wei Ying’s future boyfriend?

“I dunno,” Wei Wuxian said. “There were some real stinkers, especially in the 70s…”

Did he mean Lan Wangji?

“Can we get back on subject?” Jin Zixuan wanted to know. “Lan Wangji is on the verge of being selected to be Wen Ruohan’s heir, and I’m not sure that process doesn’t involve brainwashing at some point.”

Wait, why was it future boyfriend? Couldn’t they be boyfriends now?

“I would fight them first,” Wei Wuxian declared. “All of them. Immediately!”

“Or we could escape. I know the guards took our cell phones, but I pickpocketed Wen Zhuliu’s and the GPS says we’re actually just at a warehouse outside the city.”

“We’d need a distraction, though…”

“How about we release the giant turtle?”

“Wait, that thing in the moat is a turtle? I thought it was a snake.”

“I don’t know why you expect me to know anything about amphibians.”

“It’s not – they’re not even remotely – a snake has no legs! What is wrong with you people?!”

“Unrelated, but has anyone noticed that none of the girls got brought in? Isn’t that sexist?”

“Like Wen Ruohan being sexist is a surprise –”

“I still think we need to do something before he tries to adopt Lan Wangji –”

“Do you want to go on a date with me?” Lan Wangji asked Wei Wuxian, who blinked at him, and then beamed. “Or maybe make out in the corner while everyone’s arguing?”

That seemed like something they’d both enjoy.

It was, too, right up until someone did unleash the giant turtle, at which point it was mostly screaming and splashing and all of their families coming to their rescue at just the right time.

But Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian were dating now, so overall, a good experience.

Well, mostly. Wen Ruohan sent him countless letters for the next two months asking him to consider coming back for an internship (to be paid in "experience" and "exposure", of course).

Lan Wangji burned them all.

[amispnrewatch]

SPN 1x06 “Skin”

Okay, I’m gonna try to type while I watch this time instead of forgetting this blog exists until the episode is almost over.

You can tell the footage for the previously on segment was saved on a VHS copy instead of the original film that the show was shot with because even in the HD iTunes version I have it looks low quality as fuck. And jumpy in the way that brings me back to my teens watching the WB all the damn time.

I love this song. WTF is this song. Shazam says “Good Deal” by Mommy and Daddy. I… have no comment, except that it sounds like everything I was listening to in college at the time this shit was airing.

Aaaaand not!Dean turns around to face the SWAT team after obviously torturing some woman. THAT is a cold open.

I wanna know what that car is in the background. It’s pretty. Maybe a convertible Impala? They have similar grills. This is not at all important.

Also, I love that with these higher definition versions of the episodes you can see that Sam’s email is lawboy and whatever dot com and that people in the fandom have started calling him Law Boy. It’s hilarious.

DEAN: Well, what exactly do you tell ‘em? You know, about where you’ve been, what you’ve been doin’?

SAM: I tell ‘em I’m on a road trip with my big brother. I tell ‘em I needed some time off after Jess.

DEAN: Oh, so you lie to ‘em.

SAM: No. I just don’t tell ‘em….everything.

DEAN: Yeah, that’s called lying. I mean, hey, man, I get it, tellin’ the truth is far worse.

SAM: So, what am I supposed to do, just cut everybody out of my life? (DEAN shrugs.) You’re serious?

DEAN: Look, it sucks, but in a job like this, you can’t get close to people, period.

Aaaaand now I have Dean and Cassie feelings again and we haven’t even gotten to her episode yet.

SAM: No, man, I know Zack. He’s no killer.

DEAN: Well, maybe you know Zack as well as he knows you.

Aaaaaand now I have Dean and Lee feelings and we’re nowhere near Lee’s episode in season 15.

YOU JUST BLEW THROUGH A STOP SIGN DEAN WTF.

Little Becky. Oi with the reusing of names.

Of course Sam made friends with a bunch of rich kids while he was at college in a desperate attempt to try to be normal.

SAM: You know, maybe we could see the crime scene. Zack’s house.

DEAN: We could.

REBECCA: Why? I mean, what could you do?

SAM: Well, me, not much. But Dean’s a cop. (DEAN laughs.)

DEAN: Detective, actually.

I love that Dean was like “how dare you call me that.”

Okay, after a bit of research, I totally want to take a day trip to Bisbee, Arizona, but it’s already in the 90s here in the desert and it’s not even May so that trip is going to have to wait until… winter or something. There is no way in hell I’m going deeper into the desert when the weather gets hotter.

It’s a historic mining town tourist trap looking place now which is exactly the kind of shit I love.

SAM: Bec, look, I know Zack didn’t do this. Now, we have to find a way to prove that he’s innocent.

I mean, not technically, technically you would 1) NOT FUCK WITH A MURDER INVESTIGATION YOU’RE NOT LEGALLY INVOLVED IN BECAUSE ANYTHING YOU FIND WOULD BE INADMISSABLE IN COURT 2) find evidence to provide a reasonable doubt for the jury that he did commit the crime. You know, like a lawyer would need to do, Law Boy.

DEAN: I just don’t think this is our kind of problem.

When I made my husband watch this show with me (he’s seen it all at least once now over the years) this is the recurring thing that drove him crazy.

You guys can’t even go in through the back door? Or shut the front door behind you? Really?

REBECCA: (tearfully) Well, there’s no sign of a break-in. They say that Emily let her attacker in.

Yeah, that doesn’t even really mean that she knew her attacker. Just that it was someone she let her guard down around or got in some other way. See: The Son of Sam and Nightstalker, etc.

Love the pinup magnet on the fridge. I’d throw shade at that, but I have a pinup magnet on my fridge too so… pot kettle and all that.

Okay, both people in the next couple are gorgeous.

And oh wow those special effects changing eyes… wow.

This poor couple. I feel so bad for them in this episode.

How… how are the police gonna explain the way he was able to beat himself over the head with a bat??? I…

I love that 5:30 in the morning on TV is clearly like… 10 AM.

Okay, this is a really unrelated point, but the graffiti on the dumpster here reminds me of the Teen Wolf fandoms use of the name Void!Stiles when Stiles Stilinski was possessed by a Nogitsune… I just spent way too long digging through YouTube and my Tumblr tags from back when those episodes were airing looking for a few specific videos and couldn’t find them. The TL;DR reason I bring it up here is goofball, bi-coded main character guy getting possessed by an entity set on destroying the people he loves. SOUNDS LIKE THIS EPISODE AND A WHOLE LOT OF SPN RIGHT. I love that all these monster hunting shows call out to each other.

This scene haunts me years later and I don’t even WATCH Teen Wolf. I just watched the fandom on Tumblr collectively lose it’s shit then tripped down a Hale Pack fanfiction rabbit hole.

ANYWAY

Back to Supernatural, a show that also treated its fan base, cast, and characters like garbage! Huzzah!

DEAN: Well, there’s another way to go—down. (They look down and notice a manhole.)

I’m gonna be mature and ignore the double entendre there…

But I love that Dean thinks of the world in 3D. Which sounds like a dumb statement to make, but this is honestly a good example of that in action.

SAM: I bet this runs right by Zack’s house, too.

Really Sam, sewers run by houses? SO WEIRD. I WOULD HAVE NEVER GUESSED.

DEAN: You know, I just had a sick thought. When the shapeshifter changes shape—maybe it sheds.

SAM: That is sick. (DEAN puts the bloody pile back on the ground.)

Guys, there is a WHOLE ASS EAR in that pile of yuck you’re looking at. I think it’s pretty safe to assume the shapeshifter indeed sheds its skin like a snake. A much… gooier snake.

Sam’s friend is rightfully pissed at him for fucking with the crime scene.

This is before the pearl gripped guns?! Wow. I never noticed that before.

Also, this whole episode gives me feelings.

++++

Cool. Tumblr mobile ate a whole section of my notes on this when it crashed for NO APPARENT REASON. Love that.

It always boggles my mind that actors can trust the people they’re working with enough to let people “tie” ropes around their neck or put them in actually dangerous positions in a scene.

SHAPESHIFTER: He’s sure got issues with you. You got to go to college. He had to stay home. I mean, I had to stay home. With Dad. You don’t think I had dreams of my own? But Dad needed me. Where the hell were you?

SAM: Where is my brother? (The shapeshifter leans in close to SAM.)

SHAPESHIFTER: I am your brother. See, deep down, I’m just jealous. You got friends. You could have a life. Me? I know I’m a freak. And sooner or later, everybody’s gonna leave me. (He backs away.)

SAM: What are you talkin’ about?

SHAPESHIFTER: You left. Hell, I did everything Dad asked me to, and he ditched me, too. No explanation, nothin’, just poof. Left me with your sorry ass. But, still, this life? It’s not without its perks. (He laughs.) I meet the nicest people. Like little Becky. You know, Dean would bang her if he had the chance. Let’s see what happens. (He smiles and covers SAM with a sheet.)

This exchange is just… so much. So many feelings. And I will forever (unless we magically get a fix-it fic mini season someday…) be SO MAD that none of this got resolved in that pointless, trash heap of a finale.

REBECCA: Okay, so, this thing—it can make itself look like anybody?

SHAPESHIFTER: That’s right. (She chuckles.)

REBECCA: Well, what is it, like a genetic freak? (The shapeshifter laughs.)

SHAPESHIFTER: Maybe. Evolution is about mutation, right? So, maybe this thing was born human but was different. Hideous and hated. Until he learned to become someone else. (REBECCA looks around, uncomfortable. The shapeshifter’s eyes glint silver, and he smiles.)

It always amazes me how much of this show is a pile of accidental queer allegories parading around in an ill-fitting toxic masculinity suit.

Vulcan mind meld! I love nerd!Dean. Also, I’m rewatching Star Trek: TOS with my husband, because that is what my life amounts to these days, rewatching comfort TV and flailing over the bits I love.

This post does a better job than I can do of pairing up screen caps with the dialogue of this next scene. SIX EPISODES IN. They’re dumping all of this character depth SIX EPISODES IN. FUCK THIS SHOW FOR NOT EMBRACING ITSELF.

Okay, I love that he screams back in her face after he threw the phone. It’s not something to laugh at because the situation is horrifying, but I can’t help laughing at it every time.

AND THE WAY THEY CUT THESE SCENES. Going from him winding his hand back to backslap her directly to him dropping the chains on the table to show how hard he must have hit her without actually making the actors hit each other. Good job editing department!

I… don’t understand the shifter’s motivation for killing people. If he can take over people’s identities without killing them, why kill them? Is it just because he’s a homicidal, rapist piece of shit? Cause that’s all it seems like.

How did the SWAT team even know she was being attacked? Why can the snipers aim no better than Storm Troopers?

Ugh, these kind of transformation body horror scenes are exactly why werewolf stories have never really appealed to me much. Like, I could do without watching your ribs move and teeth fall out, dude.

BUT.

THIS FUCKING SCENE.

I looked up the song that’s playing over shapeshifter!Dean being caught by the SWAT team and then going through the grotesque transformation. (And as far as I know, the iTunes version has the original music from the episodes.)

It’s a song called “Mary” by The Death Riders

Who's your mother, who's your mother here boy // Who's your mother, whos your mommy dear // Who's your father, who's your father here boy // Who's your father, who's your daddy dear

Silently screaming // Where everyone knows // Daddy's always watchin' // Where everywhere - everywhere I go

I don't wanna be a freak show pretty boy anymore // I don't wanna be a full time slave // I don't wanna be your midnight cowboy anymore // I just want to be Mary

This is… a fascinating choice. Here are the rest of the lyrics. The song as a whole has a weird incesty kinda vibe to it? Kinda like when SPN tries to straight-wash itself and misses the mark wildly. (Like Dean’s male siren episode.)

The midnight cowboy line reminded me of 12x11 and the bull riding scene with “Broomstick Cowboy” by Bobby Goldsboro playing over it

Dream on, little Broomstick Cowboy, // Dream while you can; // Of big green frogs, // And puppy dogs, // And castles in the sand.

For, all too soon you'll awaken; // Your toys will all be gone. // Your broomstick horse will ride away, // To find another home. // And you'll have grown into a man, // With cowboys of your own. // And then you'll have to go to war, // To try and save your home.

And then you'll have to learn to hate; // You'll have to learn to kill. // It's always been that way, my son; // I guess it always will.

Because, you know, why not add tons of feelings into the lyrics, right?

Props to the people who can embrace their rewatches and reclamations of the show with ease. Because every episode seems to remind me of how hollow and tragic Dean’s ending was and I just… struggle all over again.

Anyway, back to the episode so I can move on with my day.

REPORTER: An anonymous tip led police to a home in the Central West End, where a S.W.A.T team discovered a local woman bound and gagged. Her attacker, a white male, approximately twenty-four to thirty years of age, was discovered hiding in her home. (A sketch of DEAN appears on the screen.)

DEAN: Man! That’s not even a good picture. (SAM looks around cautiously.)

SAM: It’s good enough. (He walks away.)

DEAN: Man! (He follows SAM.)

(CUT TO: Alley. DEAN and SAM are walking. DEAN steps into a puddle.)

DEAN: Ugh, come on.

I love that we get two tiny little back-to-back vanity moments for Dean here. One commenting on the sketch artist rendition of him being broadcasted on the news and the other tripping in the puddle. There is literally someone running around the city trying to kill people while wearing Dean’s face, but Dean is still concerned with how he looks appears to others. He’s still concerned with keeping up his own performance. The shifter left him with just a t-shirt, so he doesn’t even have his usual comfort layers on and at any moment someone could spot him and call the police or try to kill him for assaulting Sam’s friend. His life is wildly out of control in that moment and the only thing he can try to focus on is his appearance (something semi-controllable) and finding the shifter before any of that other shit can happen.

One day I want to put together a like top 10 episodes focusing on / explaining each TFW character from the series. Like the kind of list you could show someone who’s never seen the show, but has OPINIONS about the characters (or who hasn’t seen the whole show and seen the growth they went through… you know, like the people responsible for the travesty of 15x20). This episode would be on that list. I’m not sure how I could manage to make a list of only 10 episodes to understand Dean Winchester by, but eh.

SAM: What are you gonna do to me?

SHAPESHIFTER: Oh, I’m not gonna do anything. Dean will, though.

SAM: They’ll never catch him.

SHAPESHIFTER: Oh, doesn’t matter. Murder in the first of his own brother? He’ll be hunted the rest of his life. (He picks up a sharp knife and examines it.)

Speaking of season 15 in general, this right here. This was Chuck’s villain story arc thesis statement. AND THEY DROPPED THE GODDAMN BALL WITH IT. I think that’s the thing that honestly pisses me off the most these days (about 5 1/2 months from when the finale aired) is that they tried making the whole thing a tragedy but did such an awful job with it that it just ended up like a deflating condom balloon at a dive bar concert. Disappointing and gross. The finale for season 14 set them up SO FUCKING WELL and it just… didn’t get there.

Becky’s parents are gonna be pissed at how torn up their house is after all this shit…

And you’re not shooting him when you first see him strangling Sam because…?????

I like that he took the necklace back. Also, is this kinda Dean death number .5 of the show? Like it wasn’t him but it was also kinda him. Eh.

At least they left the windshield on Baby this time. Reflections are better than tearing her apart.

[veniteme]

Hunting for Gems

season preview

ash island x reader

prev | next

When Ash Island is forced to participate as a producer for the latest season of Show Me the Money, he knows it won't be easy. But when his partner is you, a rising producer from H1GHR, maybe it won't be as bad as he thought.

2k words

As you stand before the door to the waiting room, heart thudding loudly in your chest, you think back to when the KIFF boys were in your studio eating cake a week ago.

“What am I supposed to do?” you slap Rohan’s arm vigorously as you panic. “How am I supposed to act around him?” The rest of the boys had already left, allowing you to freak out in relative privacy.

You’ve been an avid fan of Ash Island since his days on High School Rapper 2. Once he started releasing music, your infatuation with him only increased. When Jay informed you that you’d be working with him for the entire season of Show Me the Money, your brain immediately worked itself into a frenzy. On one hand, you were excited to meet someone whose music you loved. On the other, how were you expected to function properly next to him with the entire world watching through a camera?

“Okay, first thing you need to do,” Rohan starts, “is stop hitting me! You may be weak, but if you hit me enough it starts to sting okay? And second, just be normal? Act how you usually do.” He makes it sound so easy, as if you won’t die on the spot the moment the two of you make eye contact.

“That is under the assumption that I am able to think with him sitting next to me. And alright, let’s say I am actually capable of saying more than two words in his presence, what if he doesn’t like me? What if he thinks I’m weird or annoying?” You’ll be crushed if this person that you’ve admired for so long decides he doesnt like you.

“Then he’d be a good judge of character?” You hit Rohan even harder. “Ow! Relax, I was just kidding. Look, I’ve known the guy for a couple years now, and he has no right to call someone else weird. Plus, he’s one of the chillest guys I know. You’ll be fine. From what I’ve seen recently, the only time you need to be worried is when the cameras are on.”

“What do you mean?”

-----

While you stood outside the door, Ash is inside, staring nervously at the production crew setting up the cameras. Unlike you, he is not nervous about the two of you meeting. He’s worked with countless artists, featured on so many songs, he is used to interacting with people he didn’t know. What actually scares him is having to be a functioning human being in front of all these cameras.

He’s never done a such a big production like this, never seen so many cameras all pointed at him, capturing his every move. Thinking about all the eyes that will be watching him through that lens gives him anxiety. Normally, he’d be drinking right now to take off a bit of the edge. However, he doesn't think that would help with this cold bad boy image he is already starting to have. On top of being a jerk, the public will then think he was an alcoholic.

Just when he thinks he'll burst from nerves, you decide to walk through the door, a welcome distraction from all the thoughts running through his head.

-----

The first thing you see as you walk in is the production crew. All you are filming today are some short interviews to introduce the producer teams. They’ll be airing it as a teaser for the new season. You bow your head in greeting to the staff as you head to your seat. And that’s when you see him.

The two of you make eye contact, both looking up at the same time. And then you freeze; your brain short-circuits and for a second, all you can do is stare. Ash Island, the guy whose songs take up a good chunk of your playlist, is sitting there, right in front of you.

You break out of your stupor when you hear his voice. “Hey, what’s up?” he says casually. And you realize you’re being incredibly rude to someone who is older and a senior in the industry.

“Hello! I’m Saf. I’m a producer for H1GHR Music,” you introduce yourself officially.  

He chuckles a bit. “Yeah, I know. We’ve seen each other at the H1GHR-Ambition parties.”

“Right,” you say nervously. And you guys had met before, but you didn’t think he’d remember. He was always across the room or on the opposite end of the table, so you two never really interacted. In fact, this is the first time you’ve heard his voice, and not through a song on your phone.  

“So did you want to sit down?” he asks. You’ve just been standing in front of him for a while.  

“Oh!” you immediately take a seat. Now what are you supposed to say? Thankfully, he decides to fill the silence.

“You're friends with Rohan right?” he asks. Not really who you’re thinking about at the moment, but you'll take it.

“Yeah, I am. We're in the same crew,” you explain. “Why, did he say something about me?” you ask, feigning nonchalance. If Rohan said anything remotely embarrassing about you to Ash Island, you were ready to kill him.  

“Oh no, I just remembered him drunk-dialing me last night to wish me luck on the show.” You laughed, making a comment about how dumb Rohan was sometimes. And that’s how the rest of your conversation went until you started shooting, sharing dumb stories about your mutual friend.

-----

SHOW ME THE MONEY SEASON X

Team ASH ISLAND x SAF Q&A

The two are seated side-by-side in front of the camera. Ash Island is looking quite stiff and uncomfortable, while Saf has an easy smile on her face.

Please introduce yourselves.

After a glance at Ash Island, Saf begins her introduction with a bow.

Saf: Hello, everyone. My name is Saf, I’m a producer for H1GHR Music.

Following her lead, it seems Ash Island takes his first breath since the camera started rolling.

Ash Island: Hi, guys. I’m Ash Island from Ambition Musik.

Did you two know each other before the show?

Saf: Well, of course I don’t think there’s anyone interested in Korean hip hop right now that doesn’t know Ash Island. But we’ve also seen each other in passing at events and parties and such. This is my first time really talking to him though.

As she talks, Ash Island appears to loosen up just the slightest. He directs his gaze to Saf when he speaks.

Ash Island: [to Saf] You… can just call me Ash.

Saf looks at him in surprise, her cheeks just the slightest shade darker, undetectable to most.

-----

“WHY DID THEY EDIT IT LIKE THAT?” Rohan’s obnoxious laughter in the background is only furthering your agitation.

“Come on,” Rohan lets out between spurts of laughter. “That had nothing to do with the editing. Don’t tell me that wasn’t exactly how it felt when he looked at you.”

Unable to refute his claim, all you say is “Whatever.”

“Did they have to put in the romantic background music and CGI cherry blossoms though?” you complain.

Ignoring your best friend’s following fit of laughter, you begrudgingly hit play once again.

-----

“Duuuuude I didn’t realize you were so smooth!”

“Our Bition Baby is all grown up!”

“You can just call me Ash,” Changmo repeats in a sickeningly sweet voice.

“What are you guys talking about?” Ash asks, only slightly annoyed that his labelmates had interrupted his studio time. He wasn’t making much progress today anyway.

“Did you not watch the Show Me previews last night?” Hash Swan asks.

“No, I thought I’d avoid the embarrassment of seeing myself on national TV,” Ash replies. He was there when it happened, he didn’t need reminders of how awkward he was on camera.

“Alright, you have to watch this,” Leellamarz says, pulling up the reposted video on Youtube.

-----

You guys are the youngest producer team in the history of the show. Do you feel pressured by this fact?

Saf: [to Ash] Do you want me to answer this one?

He looks at her and nods wordlessly. She smiles at him in return before addressing the camera.

Saf: Of course, working next to such big names and artists can be quite intimidating. But I think as long as we put out work that we can be proud of, I will be satisfied.

Saf: But I would appreciate it if the viewers would look kindly upon us as it is our first time on this show. I’m kind of a wimp; I think I’d be pretty hurt if I saw we were receiving hate comments.

Saf’s smile indicates she’s only joking, and the production team can be heard laughing behind camera.

Ash: I doubt anyone in their right mind would send you hate.

Saf: Why not?

Ash: All you do is sit and smile and release music. What could anyone possibly say about you?

Saf: …I’ll take that as a compliment.

Ash: It was one.

-----

“I hope you know that if you break her heart,” Changmo starts, “I’m petitioning to kick you out of the company. I am NOT risking losing an invite to AOMG-H1GHR parties because of you.”

Ash rolls his eyes. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, dude. Glad to know you have so much faith in me. But also, chill out. I haven’t even done anything yet.”

“Yet? So you are planning on making a move?” Hash Swan questions. Ash sighs. Why are these guys reading so much into everything he says?

“No, I am not making a move, I barely know her,” Ash refutes. “She’s just a producer that I will be working with for the next couple months.” That day was the first time he’d ever talked to you. There is no reason to get excited about anything just yet, even if he does think you have a nice smile.

“Come on, Ash. She’s not just a producer,” Leellamarz points out. Ash is a bit wary of where he’s going with this-

“She’s a very cute producer.” -and rightfully so. Ash really can’t catch a break with these guys. They all burst out laughing, and Changmo gives Leella a high-five.

“Whatever,” Ash mutters. “Why the sudden interest in my love life anyway?”

“Wow, you’re not even gonna try and deny that you think she’s cute?” Hash asks. This guy is way too observant.

“I have eyes. How am I supposed to not think she’s cute?” Ash says bluntly.

“You know, contrary to what you may believe, not everybody has to find her cute,” Changmo says, mostly just to tease him. “Maybe she’s just not my type,” he shrugs.

“Yeah, that’s because she’s actually nice,” Ash retorts. “And we all know that isn’t your type.”

“That’s never been your type either, Ash, so why the sudden change of heart?” Leella asks.

“Maybe I’m looking for a change of pace,” Ash says with a noncommittal shrug. This is all hypothetical anyway. It’s not like he’s planning on asking you out or anything. He just thinks you’re cute, there is no reason for the guys to make such a big deal out of it.

“Yeah, well be careful. You’re going to make some very scary people mad if you mess around with her,” Changmo warns.

“Please, the H1GHR guys are like literally the nicest guys on the planet. I think I’m safe,” Ash says.

“That’s not who I’d be worried about if I were you.”

-----

a/n: let me know what you think!! was the official show part too short? are there parts that sound weird/awkward? first time writing full fics so i'm always open to feedback!

[antivirus-mh-au]

Antivirus - Chapter 4

First Chapter Previous Chapter Ao3 Link TW: None Note: I am completely exhausted and working on a laggy computer. I will add these links when I’m not a zombie trying to use a zombie laptop. Thank you for your patience.

Click the link. Let the page load, the old laptop whirring as it opened. A YouTube video, like so many others. Opening shot, an abandoned building in the middle of the night, muffled voices talking.

Shrieking, screaming. The camera lowered as the one holding it ducks for cover. Four voices yelling at once. Suddenly, laughter. Relieved laughter.

"Fucking bats!" A man called out. The camera raising, focusing on the dark shapes fluttering out the window.

"We need to be careful," a woman said, voice light-hearted. "Those things carry rabies."

Laughter breaking through the group again, a logo of a camera appearing on the screen.

He paused the video and glanced down at the title. "OUR GREATEST HITS, VOLUME ONE." 

He sent a text to his friend.

Phoenix: who are these assholes?

The reply was immediate.

Skully: they're my assholes. College kids I made friends with on Twitter. Really cool. I don't remember being that cool when I was twenty.

He grunted aloud. Lucky him, remembering anything about his twenties. Not everyone was so fortunate.

Skully: They’re part of the MH fandom. They actually live in Alabama and were able to track down some of the locations in the videos.

He rolled his eyes.

Phoenix: Find any bodies?

Skully: Just blood.

He shuddered, pulling his hooded jacket closer to his body.

Phoenix: Cool. Morbid, but cool.

He was such a liar.

Skully: Anyway, not what I was sending them to you about. They just made a new video today and I think you might be interested in it

He grimaced.

Phoenix: This is about your crazy boyfriend, isn’t it?

Skully: He’s not my boyfriend!! I don’t know him!!!

Skully: And you know my partner doesn't share.

Phoenix: But it’s still about him. The prophet guy.

Skully: … Yeah. But you should still watch this! I think you’ll find it interesting

He leaned back against the wall and huffed.

Phoenix: Why?

Skully: … the kids talk about Tim, alright?

Skully: They talk about him a lot.

His fingers hesitated over the keys. He lingered, reading the words again and again. Tim…?

Phoenix: Fine.

Phoenix: Send me the video.

The video, almost thirty minutes long, took its sweet time to load. First thing on screen was the same logo as before, a camera with a generic full face mask behind it. The name of the channel followed, MH Unlocked. He shook his head.

The name faded out, replaced by three people on a couch. Two women, one man. A second man sat on top of an end table on the right side of the couch. The lamp that probably belonged in that spot sat on the floor at his dangling feet.

The woman on the left, a bushy haired brunette with deep tan skin, a high ponytail and golden brown eyes, gave the camera a grin.

"Hey investigators!" She waved. "We're back with another video."

"And this one's a doozy," the woman beside her said, raising her mug, which proudly bore a pride flag. If he had to guess, it was the lesbian one. Her hair was dyed orange, peachy skin flushed by makeup or a light sunburn, it was hard to tell.

"Before we start," the first woman said, "be sure to leave a like and give us your thoughts and theories in the comments! I promise, we read all of them."

"Eventually," said the man on the end table with a grin. He was the palest white guy ever, with curly black hair, glasses, and about a thousand freckles on his face. The man next to him gave him a shove, and the first man burst into laughter. 

The other man, with skin several shades darker than the brunette and a suit far too good looking for this kind of environment, rolled his eyes. He waved a hand, with a silver ring on his index finger, at the camera.

"You already know us," he said. "I'm Mix."

"I'm Holly!" The brunette on the other end said.

"I'm Wren," the orange haired woman said.

"And I'm Steve!" The freckled man grinned wide, his green eyes practically glowing with excitement. "We've got a big story for you guys today."

"Oh, very big," Wren said, before taking a drink from her mug.

"Big like the worst headache you've ever had," Mix said with a smiling roll of his eyes. Wren smacked him on the shoulder without looking away from her drink.

"So." Holly reached up from the floor and pulled up a laptop. The brand logo was covered up with a pineapple sticker. Her eyes scanned the screen as she fiddled with the touchpad, Wren leaning over to see what she was doing.

"Last night," Holly said. "Something weird happened over on the Neophyte_Calling YouTube channel."

"Weirder than normal," Wren said.

"Yeah," Holly said. She glanced over towards Steve, who swiped at the screen of his phone. He looked up.

"We'd show the footage but people don’t seem to like when we do that," Steve said. "Something something spreading the sickness." He shrugged with a smile. "But we've all watched it and we can give you a play by play of what happened."

"It might not seem that dramatic," Wren said, "but the implications are pretty intense."

"I'll say," Mix said. 

"Last night, at around ten pm," Holly started, "in the middle of his usual stream, the Neophyte went quiet. The way he does when whatever he's supposedly channeling is trying to talk through him. After about thirty seconds of silence, he started bleeding onto the table from his head, which remember, is mostly off screen. He said, "he's coming," and fell over as the screen glitched out. For another hour there was complete silence before the stream randomly ended."

"Weird shit," Steve said.

Holly nodded. "Very weird shit - but in character for him."

"Now, for those of you that don't know who the Neophyte is," Mix said, "he's the guy you see people calling 'the Prophet' in this fandom. Talks like a drug addict on a high, but many people believe there are secret messages in his words that can be decoded. They say those messages predict the future."

"Not everyone believes this," Holly said.

"I don't," Steve said, hunched over and watching his friends. "But there's definitely something funny-weird about the guy. Very… uncanny valley."

"Sometimes, unprompted, he'll stop talking and do this creepy voice." Holly cleared her throat, and when she spoke again, she lowered her voice, taking on an odd pitch to her words. "Grains of sand in the hourglass of time. Your existence is irrelevant." She shuddered, and let her voice go back to normal. "Something like that."

"That's an awful impression but it gets the job done," Mix said.

"You try doing one better," Holly said.

"The one thing all of these coherent messages have in common," Wren said, "is that they're all addressed to the same person. Someone called Tim."

Steve nodded. "And you can guess who most people think that 'Tim' is."

"It's been ten years since Marble Hornets ended," Mix said. "But it would make sense if it were Tim Wright the Neophyte was talking to. He was the only survivor, after all."

"But that would imply that Tim is watching the Neophyte streams," Wren said.

"And if he's watching the streams, he could be aware of us, too," Holly said.

The four went quiet. Mix looked at the floor. Steve traded a look of discomfort with Holly. Wren took a sip of her mug. She pulled it away from her lips with a sigh.

"If he does know about us," Wren said, "why not come forward and tell his side of the story? He could change the whole game by revealing himself."

"Probably because he's a fucking murderer," Steve said. Mix glared at him, but Steve only shrugged. "You know I'm right!"

"He did kill two people," Holly said, looking at her laptop. "Just because Kralie killed Jay doesn't make what Tim did right."

"But what other choice did he have?" Mix said. "Alex wouldn't have stopped trying to kill Tim. One of them needed to die."

"That doesn't matter to the legal system," Holly said.

"We're getting off topic," Wren said, raising a hand. "It doesn't matter if the Neophyte was talking about Tim from Marble Hornets or not. What matters is that someone is going somewhere and that's apparently good news for the Neophyte or whatever he's channeling."

"You can say the Operator, it's okay," Steve said.

Holly glared at him from over Wren's head.

"It does matter, though, if he's talking about Tim in particular," Mix said. "What if Tim is heading back to Alabama? Maybe he left after the end of the series."

"It's possible," Holly said, "but that's pure speculation. We don't know that."

"Isn't speculation all we do?" Steve said, swinging his legs gently. "Come on, let's give the audience something to chew on. What do you guys think the Neophyte was talking about? The crazier the theory, the better."

Mix frowned. "Well…"

With a shake of his head, the viewer closed the tab. He'd seen enough. Enough to make his eyes burn and hands shake. He took a deep breath, and shuddered, pulling his jacket around himself. It was a warm day beyond the safe confines of this abandoned house, but that didn't stop the chills shooting through him.

Was he afraid? Or was he angry? 

With a growl he thrust the laptop away from him and reached for his sketchbook. The pen he'd been using before still rested inside. Forcing his thoughts away from the video, he focused everything in his mind onto his art.

He wasn't a great artist, but his memory was good, and with nothing else to do most days, his skill was getting better. With proper art tools, he could've even gotten great at it. But there was no need for greatness right now. Art was supposed to be healing, and that more than anything was what he needed.

In his mind he captured the image, something he'd seen so many times before. Grinding his teeth, he let the image flow onto the page once more. His favorite thing to draw, the one thing that really made him smile.

Losing track of time was part of the appeal. With the light from his laptop, he could see the whole page, or at least enough of it to work. The ink bled into the paper, the lines assembling into a rough image that soon became a face. He could see it so well in his mind's eye. As if the man he pictured was right in front of him. But he wasn't. And if the man knew what was good for him, he'd stay that way.

The sound of a new message on Discord got his attention. He glanced at the time instead. An hour, flown by, his mind lost in an ink-based daydream. Exhaling hard, he looked back at the art on the page. It wasn't finished. It would probably never be finished. But as it was… it was perfect.

Tim Wright made a very good model, unaware of that as he was.

Running his hand over the page, feeling the indents where his pen dug deep into the paper, he shook his head, and smiled.

"Better not be coming back, Tim," the man, the Maniac, said. "If you do… I'll have to kill you.”

[holyfuckthisfishcandrive]

Professors and Shortbread

First, Previous (Chap. 18), Ao3

Word count: 2186

Warnings: smoking, swearing, bones (talked about)

Roman woke up to someone violently shaking him.

"Wake up," Remus hissed. "Wake up, wake up, wake up, asshole!"

"What is it?" Roman grumbled, trying to shake Remus' hand off. "Fuck, Remus, it's like three am! We have school tomorrow, you fucking dick."

"Roman, I just realized something! Stop hitting me, this is important!"

Roman groaned and finally sat up.

"What is so important that you have to wake me up at three am on a school night?"

"It's more like four am, but that's beside the point," Remus waved off. "I just realized that Professor Logic is really fucking stupid."

Roman blinked at him exasperatedly.

"Okay," he said after a moment. "Mind if I go back to sleep now?"

"No, this is important! When I called him Mr Logic he complained, saying that he didn't go to school for years to get called Mister. If that's true that would mean that he's actually a Professor!" Remus whisper yelled.

Roman glanced from one side to the other than back to Remus.

"Yeah?"

"There can't be that many Professors in this city right? Especially not that many young, male, tall ones!"

Finally, it dawned on Roman what Remus was saying.

"So... we can try to find out his civilian identity," he mumbled and a wide grin spread over Remus' face.

"Exactly!"

---

Usually, Roman stuck around after rehearsal for a little while, chatted with the other members of the drama club or helped out with something while Remus goofed around with his friends in the club but on this Wednesday he and Remus grabbed their bags as soon as the bell rung and were the first ones out of the door.

They all but ran out all the way back home, almost getting hit by a taxi and earning a few looks and glares on the way.

The elevator ride was way too long in Roman's opinion.

They dropped their bags in their rooms,  Remus got the list he had created of all Professors whose addresses he could find in the phone book or on the internet and Roman put on his 'good kid' mask to ask Ma for a little money, pretending that it was just for him. She gave him a fifty-dollar bill. The money was for the subway and a quick lunch on the go and Roman was pretty sure that it was way more than they would need but better safe than sorry. He wasn't sure how much fast food would cost.

And just a few minutes after they had come home they were already on their way out again.

Most Professors lived downtown or at least near downtown so they first took a train downtown and went to a small Chinese place for lunch (which was a lot cheaper than Roman had expected).

Remus pulled out a map and they began marking down the addresses to see which route would be the best. Roman doubted they could check out all of them in one day but they would do their best  either way.

33 Professors was a lot for one city but Remus guessed it made sense since apparently here in downtown housing was cheap and the university was very close.

The first name on their list was Professor Jacobs.

They sauntered through the streets, using their map as a guide.

The house they ended up in front of was a trashy apartment building with at least five notes at the doorbell signs saying that the bells didn't work.

Roman pressed the Professors bell and turned to Remus.

"I'll do the talking, okay? Cause if we do find Logic I don't want you blurting out the actual we're here."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine. Sorry, I'm honest."

He didn't really mean it, well aware of how many times he had gotten on trouble for blurting out the truth without thinking.

The door buzzed and the pushed it open.

"Who's there?" an old-sounding voice called and as he looked up through the stairs Remus spotted a man that looked like one of those fivehundred-year-old turtles trying to look down.

"We have the pizza you ordered," Roman called back.

"I didn't order any pizza!"

"Are you sure- Oh, my mistake, sir! I misread the name! I'm terribly sorry, have a nice day!" Roman did his typical Prince Charming smile even though the man couldn't see - It was simply part of the performance - and pushed Remus back out of the door. As soon as it fell shut the smile fell again.

"If that was Logic I'm eating Ma's hats," Remus said.

Roman snorted and Remus' grin widened at the real smile on his brother's face. They were too rare.

"Okay, who's next on the list?" Roman said and Remus crossed Professor Jacobs off.

The next door they rang at was opened by a young woman named Professor Jain who looked like the living embodiment of the muddle-headed professor cliche. Roman asked which apartment someone they had seen on the bell sign an L. Williams lived in, claiming they had found their purse and awkwardly thanked her when she didn't know. Remus glanced at the door across from Prof Jain's that clearly said Williams and tried not to laugh out loud.

They visited Professor Davis and Professor Brown, Professor Price and Morgan and Professor Underweather.

Too old, too fat, too much boob, too brown, too short.

It was around seven pm now and they had had seven flukes which somehow was both too much (because why couldn't they just fucking find that asshole? Remus lit a cigarette in frustration) and too little (because how could they only have stopped by seven people so far? It was already getting too late, goddammit).

"Let's do one more and then go home," Roman yawned.

"So whose last for today?" Remus asked glancing at the list Roman was currently holding.

"Some Professor Youngblood. About as weird a name as Underweather. Good news: it's just a block away."

They walked down the street and Remus watched the smoke from his cig curl and fade into the evening sky. A few times he tried to make rings but he still couldn't figure out how to. Maybe that was just a cartoon thing though he could have sworn to have seen it in live-action movies too. Were there YouTube tutorials on this kind of stuff?

"Here it is," Roman said and Remus blinked back to reality.

They stood in front of a simple townhouse. The most notable thing was the flower bouquet visible in one of the windows that looked like something Patton would make.

"Let's give it a shot," Remus said dropped his cig and extinguished it with his shoe.

They walked up the three steps to the front door and Roman rung the doorbell. It was only one with two names. Youngblood and Youngblood-Smith.

Probably a marriage, Remus thought with distaste and prepared himself for some old dick to open up.

The door swung open and to Remus' surprise, it was a teenager probably even younger than them who leaned against the doorframe and glared at them. His eyeliner was sharper and neater than Remus would be able to make it in a thousand years and his lips were painted in a nice shade of dark purple. Maybe Remus should ask him what brand it was. It looked awesome.

"What do you want?" the boy asked with a scowl.

Remus waited for Roman to answer with some kind of excuse or something.

Roman remained silent.

The boy's glare became darker with every passing moment.

At this rate, he probably wouldn't tell Remus what lipstick he was using.

Annoyed Remus glanced over at Roman to see what the fuck was keeping him from saying anything.

The look on Roman's face almost made him gag.

Roman stared at the boy in front of them like he was the most incredible thing in the world. Like he had put the stars in the sky or was made from pure moonlight or some stupid shit like that. He stared at him as he stared into the air when he had some stupid crush or played some lovestruck idiot. He stared like he was going to start waxing poetry at any second now.

Remus doubted he had even heard the boy speak at all.

So he would have to take the situation into his own hands.

"You don't happen to be Professor Youngblood, do you?" Remus asked.

The boy raised an eyebrow.

"Do I look like I'm a fucking Professor? I'm his son, dumbass."

"Is he home?"

"No, not at the moment. What do you want from him?"

The he/him pronouns were a good sign so far and Remus couldn't imagine this guy's dad to be a Doderer. The British accent, on the other hand, wasn't a good sign but Logic could probably cover his accent or something if he really wanted to.

Roman also seemed to finally be back on earth and not on cloud nine.

"We're students of his and we have a question about this homework he gave us," he lied before Remus could say anything.

"You are?" the boy raised his other eyebrow.

"Yes, we are. Do you happen to know if he'll be back soon?"

"Not sure," the boy shrugged. "If it's that important you can come in and wait though. I could also offer you some black tea."

"Really? Yeah, er that would be awe- I mean, that would be nice!" Roman agreed.

"What are your names?" the boy asked as he led them inside. He walked past a door that probably went down to a basement and a staircase up into a small living room.

"I'm Roman," Roman said with a small bow - Jesus fucking Christ was he going fucking insane over this guy?

"And I'm Remus. I'm the good-looking twin, obviously."

The Professor's son chuckled, hiding his mouth behind his hand. "Obviously."

"And what's your name?" Roman sounded like he was asking for a precious gift rather than a fucking name.

"It's Virgil. Do you take milk and sugar in your tea?"

"Milk in tea?" Roman asked confused.

"Yeah, sure!" Remus agreed. Maybe the milk would flake as it did in juice.

Virgil came back with two cups and poured them, giving Roman a little bit of milk anyway, saying that it would be way too strong otherwise and he couldn't allow Roman to drink it pure but somehow Roman didn't complain when Virgil stood over him to pour it in. God, he was being fucking gross and sappy.

Virgil picked up his own cup again and offered them some weird cookies he called shortbread even though they didn't taste like bread at all.

Remus dumped two in his tea - which sadly hadn't flaked - and mushed them around with his spoon.

For a few minutes, it was quiet until Remus got bored with the steady clicking of the clock hanging on the wall behind him.

"So, do you like bones?" he blurted out the first question that came to mind.

Roman looked at him with barely concealed horror but Virgil's dark expression lightened up slightly to both of the twins' surprise.

"I do. It's fun to find them and clean them. I have a few in a cupboard in my room I've found in subways and other places over the years."

"Really?" Remus lit up excitedly. "I collect them too! My favourite is a   near-complete snake skeleton with a rat skull stuck inside!"

"Wow! That sounds so cool!" Virgil didn't quite smile but he wasn't scowling anymore either. "I once found a dog jaw in a quite good conditiion. And I have this really nice possum skull."

"Ooh! Can I see them?" Remus asked bouncing slightly in his seat.

"Sure. Wait here, I'll go get them," Virgil stood up and left the room. Remus could hear him walk upstairs.

"He seems nice," he commented.

"He's beautiful," Roman sighed dreamily.

"Yuck."

"You get to rant about sexy people to me, I get to talk about crushes, that's the deal," Roman reminded him.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Fine, sure. But don't be too gross about it."

They heard Virgil come back downstairs.

He showed Remus the bones and gave him some tips when Remus asked how he had gotten them so clean.

"Oh, jeez it's almost eight. We should probably get going," Roman said after a while. "Maybe we'll get to talk to the Professor some other time."

Virgil seemed to study his face for a few moments.

"Yeah, maybe," he finally said and accompanied them to the door.

"Can I have your number?" Remus asked  holding out his phone. "Then I can send you some pics of my bones and stuff!"

"Sure," Virgil took it and typed something in. "Maybe we'll get the chance to talk again sometime."

The door closed behind them and Roman swirled around to face Remus.

"You got his number?!"

"Yeah, duh."

"That's not fair! Why did he give you his number and not me!"

"Well, I didn't drool over him," Remus shrugged.

Roman pouted the entire way to the train station.

Next

Taglist:

@patton-cake

[uwua3]

hi! first off, congrats on the new blog!! i read that misumi piece and i really enjoyed it hehe,, if it's alright, may i request some domestic fluff with kazunari? mayb looking over old photo albums of each other from when they were kids and laughing and telling stories about what happened in the photos? thank you very much and i hope u have a nice day :D

hi!!! this made me so happy 🥺 thank you so much, i hope to keep this blog running for a long time! also, i saw your reblog of my jealousy hcs and i wanted to say thank you for your sweet comments!!! i go back to it whenever i need motivation, you inspire me to keep writing ♡ thank you! i hope to continue making you proud as a writer :D <3

summary: kazunari had to stop living in the past and make new memories outside of his yearbooks with you

author’s note: this is definitely a much happier piece than my others! this was refreshing to write and i treasure it dearly, it’s definitely much more on the humorous side! no angst today, folks!!! (ok just a little, but it’s barely noticeable!)

this is just a little look into a hoarder named kazunari and his sentimental, nostalgic personality �� i, myself, am a marie kondo supporter so i love decluttering! if you are a hoarder like kazunari, honestly go you! you keep those knick knacks that remind you of memories! do whatever makes you the happiest :D

word count: 2,151

music: make you mine – public, tongue tied – grouplove (this song is so Kazunari !!!)

nostalgia.

🌻🎨 miyoshi kazunari

it was that time of year again

kazunari hated spring cleaning with a passion. so what if his art supplies were all over the dorms? he knew where everything was! uh, mostly...

(if you ignore his daily panicked house searches which kept everyone up way too late if he couldn’t locate a very specific paint shade for a big project he definitely procrastinated)

so, it took, so much bribery to get kazunari to even consider cleaning out his entire dorm room

(muku was a very Good Boy and already had his side of the room perfectly dusted and organized)

yes, you had to promise to pose as a model for one of his paintings one day (hopefully, not the type of class you were thinking) (kazunari’s suggestive wink didn’t help)

the thing about kazunari was he was somewhat of a, putting it politely, hoarder

as an extremely sentimental person, it would take the whole mankai company to even force him to throw something away

(“no! it has a special meaning to me! i remember what happened when i got this~” kazunari would whine, holding the useless item between his hands with no intentions to ever look at it again)

so the boys employed you to be kazunari’s rational judgement when cleaning that day

(“please actually make him do something.” sakyo looked like he was on the border of begging; kazunari’s abundance of random knick knacks and shopaholic addiction problem was becoming an issue that affected everyone)

rule #1 of cleaning kazunari’s storage room: don’t open anything because kazunari will become very sentimental and nothing will get gone

so therefore, as a team, you two tackled the rather spotless room. the interior was minimal and modern, just like kazunari liked it with pops of color here and there

(he had one blank white wall and you realized it was the backdrop he used to film all his social media posts [dancing tik toks, fashion #ootds on instagram, daily vlogs on his growing youtube channel])

at first, you were confused where all his stuff went until you opened a closet against his terrible and unconvincing distractions

without time to react, you found yourself buried in tens of books you couldn’t even fathom how it all fit

(“i’ve played way too much tetris.” kazunari would admit later on when asked about his immaculate stacking)

“you’ve got to be kidding me!” you groaned, pushing your head above the surface of book covers that have either never been opened or were way too old to even be functionable

“i’m sorry~ please, forgive me!” kazunari pleaded, immediately pulling you out of his own mess and using all his cuteness to make you roll your eyes fondly at your best friend

you almost started ranting at him about the dangers of taking up too much closet space with useless items before you realized:

wait! stop! he’s trying to get you to forget about throwing these books out! you thought suddenly, crossing your arms as you stared at the pile, trying to figure out how to approach the situation

“you cannot distract me. we are going through this mound and you will be getting rid of something today.” you ordered, seeing his shoulders drop in defeat as he nodded solemnly, but accepting his fate without any arguments. thank god for that

you two bent down and organized all the books into categories. popular photography instruction guides, creative advice columns, and all his past art textbooks kazunari couldn’t sell were put into a seperate group because luckily, they were relevant to his art school

things like old newspapers with funny comics were recycled (you refused to let kazunari read them in fear of invoking some form of nostalgia) (also because he had the whackiest sense of humor ever and would die laughing)

it was going well, until you reached the thickest photo books of them all (you had almost forgotten what you and kazunari’s school mascot was)

but unsurprisingly, kazunari had every single yearbook from each year of his education all the way until his last year in high school piled high to his chest

even he looked somewhat shocked from his mass accumulation from his teen years

“ah! i’m so old now~ look at all this! what else can i do except die?!” kazunari dramatically flopped onto his bed, tired of lifting so much weight. hey! his arms weren’t meant for exercise, he was a painter!

lifting his head to see you were distracted from alphabetically sorting the first section lovingly dubbed, “art shit”, kazunari mischeviously grinned as he leaned down to snatch a random yearbook

flipping to a random page, kazunari smiled as he realized it was the first time he ever met you back in elementary

kazunari sang your name as he sat upwards, having a shit–eating look on his face as he started swinging his legs back and forth

oh no, he was up to something no good, you knew it but humored him anyways

“yes, kazu?” you turned your line of sight to the most horrible picture possible: you with the ugliest haircut in the entire world with kazunari’s black hair taking up the entire photo as you two sheepishly smiled for the camera. it was not a proud moment

okay, maybe it wasn’t that bad, you just couldn’t help but shriek at the sight of your hair

“oh my god! you can’t just jumpscare me like that!” you laughed despite yourself. you knew you had to be serious and focused on decluttering, but one look at your past made you remember all the good times before so–called “adulthood”

“look at your hair!” you cackled, reaching up to playfully yank at his mullet as he yelped and lightly smacked your hand away. rubbing the back of his neck, kazunari huffed childishly and pouted like he was back in his youth

“come on! this was the pinnacle moment i realized, i should not be a hair dresser.” kazunari commented, making you remember how you just let a random 8–year–old boy waddle up to you with safety scissors and advertise his salon business like a professional

(yes, you bought into it right away. your teacher had a heart attack when she saw you with a majority of your hair on the floor and kazunari keeping small talk like an actual hair stylist)

thinking back after the haircut incident, you weren’t allowed to chat with the funny class clown anymore as you were forced to wear a hat every day

(it was either that or go completely bald to fix the job kazunari did to your head)

it wasn’t until you received a very creative and colorful apology letter with tons of sad faces drawn with waxy crayons that you snuck out to play with him on the swings in recess

“i can’t believe we became friends because i wanted free hair cuts for the rest of my life.” you added, staring at the picture with a sense of nostalgia. you kinda got where kazunari was coming from, memories were fun to look at every once and a while

at least, eleven years worth of memories after being inseperable from that moment forward

(maybe, you should’ve held onto it, you thought, not knowing that would be the first of many art pieces you would be gifted by him)

kazunari knew he won. excited, he dropped down to lay on his stomach as you leaned against the bed, watching as he thumbed through the pages with ease, leaning his head on yours comfortably

it was rare to find kazunari quiet, he must’ve been like this all the time when going through his stuff, you thought, at peace for once

lazily smiling, kazunari put his finger against your yearbook pictures as he reminisced on the past. something about everyone ever in your grade, how kazunari knew everyone and had a special memory with each person, no matter how big or small

“—and here, the teacher somehow caught a pic of us swinging wayyy too high for kids our age!” kazunari laughed, breaking your train of thought as you snickered at the absolute joy radiating from both your faces as you two competed to see who could reach the clouds

(kazu won. you fell off right after and had to get picked up from your parents after badly scraping your knee. it took another sorry letter and art of you two holding hands with a heart for your parents to forgive kazunari)

“let’s go back.” you interrupted him, making him sit up confused as you swung your keys out from your back pocket. it didn’t take any convincing for kazunari to nod right away and took the elementary yearbook into his arm

you two only had to exchange a secret look before formulating a plan to sneak out, leaving music on from kazunari’s speakers to act like kazunari was still cleaning

you two giggled amongst yourselves before clambering into your car, speeding off and laughing loudly from your successful getaway. the manager was none the wiser!

during the short car ride, you and kazunari played your favorite mixtape of all time

(“you kept this?!” kazunari yelled, giddily bouncing up and down from excitement when he discovered the mixtape stash)

he slipped the disc in as you two yelled along to childhood favorites with the windows rolled down, letting the entire neighborhood know the best duo were back in town

(seriously, there were so many you stashed away in your glove department. all labeled in sharpie with compelling titles connected to the inside jokes only you two found funny)

arriving at the destination, you two exited the vehicle to see the play pen was abandoned as the teaching staff went home for the day

the sun was setting and it felt like the playground was in another rift of time as you approached it, hearing the weak movement of the swings going back and forth on their own. you sat down, holding onto the chains. you hadn’t been back ever since you graduated. it hadn’t changed at all

kazunari opened the elementary yearbook back to the original page, pulling out his tripod and phone he always had on hand in his backpack as he set it up right across the swing set

“what are you doing?” you inquired, tilting your head as he fumbled around pressing different buttons and filters too complex for you to remember

looking up, kazunari grinned as he set a timer for 10 seconds before sprinting back to the swing next to you

“swing contest right now! i bet i could swing higher than you ever could!” kazunari challenged childishly, quickly kicking his legs for the momentum. you narrowed your eyes, refusing to lose as you two laughed over the sound of his phone taking a burst of photos

you realized what he was doing. he was re–creating your memories together

but you turned to look at him and your heart skipped a beat. you never remembered him looking this, different, in the purple lighting. for a flashing moment, you swore you saw the silhoutte of his black–haired, child self sit next to you before you blinked and saw him. kazunari was the same, just older now

you slowed down your swing by dragging your sneakers against the wood chipped ground. you grabbed both the swings’ chains to hold them together

you didn’t want to live in the past anymore. you wanted to grow up with him, too

“what—” kazunari started, matching your pace before being cut off by your lips against his, the phone going off for one last time

you pulled yourself in close enough just to smile. he smelled the exact same as he did when he discovered cologne for the first time. he never changed

you pulled away first even if he tried leaning forward for more, like he was waiting all these years just for that one moment. like he saw you in the same light, too

“i wanted to do that for years.” you confessed, watching as he took your hand carefully, like he was afraid you were going to leave. for once, he didn’t know what to do, which face to show

“me too...” kazunari agreed, seemingly speechless before straightening his back, like he was about to run away. the hair on your neck stood up, what was he about to do?

“i promise i won’t cut your hair anymore, unless?” kazunari winked dramatically, mimicking the shape of scissors with his fingers as he tried snipping at your hair

he laughed as you shoved him with all your might, hopping off the swing to chase him throughout the school parking lot

now this was a memory kazunari would never throw away, no matter what

(no one thought the two of you escaped until kazunari posted the pics on his instagram, both of you getting a scolding from sakyo this time)

(busted!)

[remindme2breathe]

It’s simple... said no one.. EVER

I’m here again! Just when I thought Tumblr would be a quick-lived fad. There’s something beautiful about having the freedom to express yourself. It’s always been my therapeutic weapon of choice. While most would benefit from over paying for a complete stranger to listen to the sad story of ‘why I’m here’, I get to do it for free. Thanks Tumblr, for giving me space to just SAY IT. 

I’m a mom. My life is complicated to the few that get to witness it, but to me, this chaos is my normal. Perhaps my mental state has convinced my emotional parts that this non-stop roller coaster is correct FOR ME. Not everyone is cut out for it. I have 4 beautiful children. Ready for the complexity? My eldest is from my first relationship, he was planned. In my mind, my first born child was my rock- the main reason I left my childish ways and grew. Because of him I finished college, left my former position as a Dj (yes, once upon a time, I WAS THAT COOL). I left car shows, clubs, parties for the unconditional love of my baby boy, a decision I never grew to hate. He filled a void in my soul I couldn’t have filled any other way, believe me I TRIED. In a few days he will be 18 years old, and although I am excited to watch him graduate, get his drivers license, and go to college- I am equally terrified. All his life.... wait... I have 3 other kids to tell you about! Put a pin in this! 

My second child, also a beautiful boy, was a surprise and a blessing! He is 14, has ADHD and has taught me how different siblings can be. While my first child was calm, never threw a fit, always listened, and was a book worm, this baby was the total opposite. Don’t get me wrong, he is definitely a good boy. Never been in trouble at school or any serious trouble at home. This little one I share with his dad, my second relationship, well, my first marriage to be precise (pin placed- I got you!). My litte boy has the biggest heart, super emotional kid. Loves odd information. If you wanna know about farts, cemeteries, old presidential facts, and anything youtube related, he’s the one to ask! This kid is an encyclopedia of useless information. I think it’s funny because all the information he’s stored in his genius brain and NONE OF IT benefits him with school. He struggles. All in all, we are really close and he knows that where his dad might be lacking, Mama has his back! (Side note: his dad is amazing! He loves this kid and this kid loves him- no shade)

My 3rd and 4th are not mine by blood, but the love I have for them is no different then what I feel for my own. Would this make us the modern day Brady bunch? The third one is 10 years old, she is the sweetest little thing! She is my boyfriends identical twin! The resemblance is uncanny! You would have thought he birthed her himself! All she needs is a mustache and beard! The arrangement between my boyfriend and his Ex has always been the same, he got them on the weekends, then every other week. Only that this little one decided she didn’t want to live with her mom anymore and preferred to live with us. There’s a story here, one I won’t tell at this moment... patience grasshopper! So, the 10 year old sweetie pie lives with us. 

The 4th little bitty is her mothers a MILLION%! Geez! Imagine that, waking up to watch an exact replica of your boyfriends ex running around your house... tell me what that feels like. She’s 9 years old and complete opposite of the 10 year old. She’s tougher, sassier, a little braver. In my house the 9 year old and my 14 year old are called THE BULLIES. They share a wing of my house on purpose. Since we share them with other parents we gave them a different wing for a variety of reasons. 1. They are like butt-cheeks: INSEPARABLE! 2. When their with their other parents that wing is shut down (a/c). 3. We kept the tiny gang away from the calmer kids. I don’t know what it is about those two, but they LOVE to annoy or antagonize the older ones. Anyway, this set up works for us. Clearly they are not aware of their title, this is just what we joke with between my boyfriend and I. We are equal opportunity labelers though, the older ones are ‘The Complainers’... any noise, if the kids breathe or laugh too loud they complain. 

Not bad for a second entry... had more to say then I thought. Before the BETTER MOMS come for me for labeling my kids, I feel it’s best your aware, I am writing for ME, not for you. I am writing to keep my sanity in the midst of the crazy I deal with. Welcome to my NORMAL. 

[renlimotroll]

Call It What You Want To (part 1)

Warnings: BL/ Personification/ Imagination/ EXTREMELY OUT OF CHARACTER

Tags: LimoSiruMin Neighbor AU, toddler Ichihachi, Baby Jiraichan and Baby Quartet

Summary: Siruko has two new neighbors, and he does the only thing he can’t do. He falls in love with them.

A/N: For the sake of the story, it’s a world where boys’ love is accepted, but polyamory isn’t quite the norm. Of course anything in the story wouldn’t reflect reality in any way, are you kidding me. Please don’t take it too seriously, it’s just my imagination. I just wanted to stress-write. Don’t read if it will only make you cringe. Thank you. You have been warned. 🍋🐶🤖

Chapter 1

Siruko held the tiny hands with his fingers, and his heart just swells up everytime he looks at them. He was finally able to put down Quartetchi and Jiraichan to sleep, and Siruko’s not being biased here, but they’re the cutest babies in the world. At thirteen months old, both babies show signs of intelligence and good motor skills, but Siruko doesn’t care about that. All he wants is for them to grow up healthy and happy.

Something tugs his shirt, and Siruko looks down to see the other reason for his living. Three-year-old Ichihachi timidly hands him the book they’ve been reading the night before. Sometimes he can’t believe how fast Ichihachi is growing and wants time to stop just for a little while, just so his little boy can still stay little for a short while.

The years haven’t been easy for Siruko. Three years ago, his ex-girlfriend left Ichihachi to him and ran away with the guy she’s been cheating on him with, which happens to be Ichihachi’s father. Siruko doesn’t really care; frankly, the girl only used him for his money, and he can’t say he loved her that much. It was really hard taking care of a baby all by himself, but Ichihachi was the best thing that ever happened to him. He had always wanted kids, and though it was a little bit early, it was fine. As far as the world knows, Ichihachi is his child, and he loves him so much he’ll give him the world and more.

Then, two years later, he found two babies in an abandoned basket behind the garbage dump. He would have missed it; the babies weren’t crying or anything. It was Ichihachi who led him to them, when Siruko for a moment took his eyes off of him to tie his own shoe lace. Ichihachi liked cats, and he followed one on his own, to the best his small toddler legs can take him. Siruko almost had a panic attack when he looked up and didn’t see him, until he saw the brown scarf he wrapped him with trailing on the ground. He snagged the small boy immediately and hugged him; his heart rapidly beating within his ribcage, afraid to lose his son. Ichihachi, of course, oblivious to Siruko’s worry, just patted his cheek to get his attention and mumbled, “Touchan, touchan.” He followed the direction where Ichihachi’s small finger was pointing, to find two small babies wrapped in gray and pink blankets. His chest hurt seeing them abandoned like this, how could anyone just abandon their children? Siruko sighed to himself; if he didn’t get any answer to that from Ichihachi’s mother, then he sure won’t get it here in the garbage dump. After checking that the babies were not hurt or anything, he called the authorities. The babies cooed at him adorably and even grinned gummily at him. Siruko knew there and then that he had to adopt them, no matter what it takes. His heart was already captivated, and with a few favors and pulling strings and money throwing here and there, in six months he was able to take them home. He learned that the two babies were not related, and Siruko promised to give them a home and a family.

Sure it was tough, but it was also rewarding. Siruko was really happy. It would be nice to have a companion, a partner, but that seems impossible now that he doesn’t have time for dating, and no one really wants a man with three kids as a baggage. He’s content with his children though, and sometimes his friends, brother and parents come to help him. He’s really at a good place in his life, in a nice apartment building in a small, old city.

Apparently, said apartment building has new occupancy. Both his neighbors to the left and right of his unit were leaving, and Siruko was a bit sad because they were really nice people. He just hoped the new neighbors would be understanding of the noises his children make, not that they make a ruckus though. Ichihachi is an angel, and both Quartet and Jiraichan rarely cry, except when other people hold them. His children are the best, no bias there. Plus, the units have pretty thick walls anyway.

One evening, when the babies have finally settled down and he has read Ichihachi’s bedtime story, after spending a little time watching his kids sleep (so cute), Siruko stretched and yawned. He still has some work to do, so, after taking the baby monitor and turning on Ichihachi’s cat night lamp, he went to his work space so he can open his laptop and check his notifications.

Or he would, had there not been a knock on the door. Siruko glanced at the clock and wondered who in the world would knock on his door at midnight.

Groaning internally and checking quickly to look if he’s wearing something decent (a red shirt and really short black shorts, oops), he trudged his way to the door, hoping his irritation didn’t show in his face.

Opening the door revealed a tall man with glasses, short green hair and emerald eyes. Really striking emerald eyes. Oh. Wow.

Said man smiled a little and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “Hi. Sorry we had to meet this way, I’m Mintosu.” He bowed slightly and Siruko came back to senses and remembered, right, manners, and mirrored the bow a bit lower.

“I’m your new neighbor, just came in two days ago. Hadn’t had the chance to greet anyone yet because I was busy unpacking. Sorry about that.”

“Sure, don’t worry about it.” Siruko replied, clearing his throat afterwards. He sounded so hoarse and tired, yikes. Wait, since when did he care about his voice? “I’m Siruko. I have three kids, so I’m apologizing in advance for any racket.”

“Oh! Of course, it’s no big deal. Kids are cute.” Mintosu grinned again, and Siruko blinked. That’s… really distracting.

“Anyway, I was wondering if you’ve got any coffee left? I really need to finish some work and it’s my unlucky day coz I ran out and it’s midnight, I forgot to check out where the supermarkets are in the area and I wasn’t sure where the convenience stores are too.” The man spoke really fast and slurred his words together, so it took a second for Siruko to process what his new neighbor was saying, but really, his voice sounds really nice. Siruko won’t mind listening to it again and again.

“Ah! Coffee! Right!” Siruko startled out of his thoughts and went to the kitchen, fetching the extra bag he had. He handed it to his new neighbor, fingers brushing accidentally. 

Mintosu’s beam grew wider. “Thanks! Appreciate it! I owe u one!”

“No problem!”

“It was really nice to meet you.” The man said earnestly before he left. “Hope I can see you and the kids around soon.”

“It’s nice to meet you too.” Siruko smiled pleasantly. He watched Mintosu go back to his own apartment to the right, bowing slightly as they caught gazes again. His new neighbor seems really nice, he thought, as he closed the door and went back to work.

Two weeks later, Siruko bumped into his second new neighbor in the elevator. His brother Hakotaro was watching the kids as he ran a few errands and picked up the groceries. He couldn’t really see anything from the huge paper bag he was hugging and the several plastic bags hanging from his arms, so it was more of a feeling that he hit someone.

“I’m sorry!”

“Need any help there?” A deep, frankly quite sexy voice asked. Siruko wasn’t even able to respond when the paper bag he was clutching tightly was gently pulled by someone, and the weight disappeared. As his view cleared, a man with gorgeous light blue locks appeared in front of him. He was wearing piercings, but he was also wearing a suit. What.. what is it with meganes lately? Why does Siruko find them attractive so suddenly? Where are they all coming from?

“T-thank you.” Siruko bowed as deeply as he could.

“Don’t mention it. I’m Limone, by the way. My friends call me ‘Sensei’. You can call me that too.” The man chuckled. His eyes were a beautiful shade of cerulean and it was really captivating.

“I’m Siruko. I haven’t seen you here before, are you visiting someone?”

“Oh, actually I’m new here! I just arrived yesterday, and today my moving-in gifts just arrived so I’ll drop them by your place tomorrow. Sorry I can’t personally give them, I have a meeting tomorrow.”

“That’s fine. Welcome to the building.”

The elevator dinged open, and they both tried to step out, surprising each other, their arms brushing. Limone-sensei stepped back to let Siruko through first, and Siruko thought, wow he’s a gentleman too.

“Umm… by the way, are you the Siruko? The youtuber?”

“Ahh…” Siruko sighed deeply, forcing a smile. “Yep, that’s me.”

Limone-sensei turned serious. “Hey, I won’t tell anyone, I promise, don’t worry.” He seemed sincere enough, so Siruko smiles genuinely this time. “I watched some of your videos and I thought I recognized your voice. But say… what are you doing in a simple apartment building like this?”

“Ah, well… Used to share it with ex-gf until she ran away with someone else, the usual story.” Shiruko shrugged.

Sensei shook his head lightly. “Tsk. That’s the worst. She doesn’t deserve you anyway.” Siruko had to chuckle at that. They arrived at his apartment, and he fished for his keys.

“Oh, Um… looks like we’re neighbors. I live to your left.”

“Really? That’s a nice coincidence. By the way, I’m apologizing in advance for the noise. I have three kids, 2 babies and a toddler.”

“Oh yeah?” Sensei looked excited. “I like babies. They’re so cute.”

Siruko was finally able to unlock the door, so Sensei gave him back the paper bag. “It was nice to meet you, Siruko-san!”

“Likewise! Thanks for carrying my groceries, Sensei!” The man waved as he strolled back to his own apartment. Okay, Siruko now has two hot, really nice neighbors. What in the world is happening?

“I saw your landlord Oshin-san a while ago. He said you have new neighbors?” His friend Gzira asked while helping Ichihachi change into his outdoor clothes. For some reason, the toddler really likes wearing scarves, so Gzira wrapped the young boy in a yellow one today.

“Un! I talked to them, they’re really nice!” Siruko commented while double-checking the diaper bag. The two babies were in the stroller, babbling at each other in baby language.

Gzira had to do a double-take. “Wait, you talked to people not me and your brother?”

Siruko frowned. “Hey, I’m perfectly capable of talking to other people!”

“Yeah, your subscribers, two babies who can’t even form words, and a toddler who knows maybe about 20 words do count as an engaging conversation.”

“Why am I friends with you?” The purple head sulked.

Gzira laughed that really contagious laugh of him. “Didn’t we establish that it’s because you don’t really talk to other people?”

Siruko stuck out his tongue at his friend, not that it really helped him prove his point. Ichihachi giggled adorably at his otouchan. “To my left is Limone-sensei. He helped me with groceries and he has piercings but he wears suits. He’s really nice. To my right, his name is Mintosu but he said I can call him Minben-san, and he gave me back really delicious coffee when he ran out and I gave him my extra. They’re both meganes and really handsome.”

Gzira blinked and stared at him strangely. “What?” Siruko paused his rambling.

“Handsome?” Gzira asked, laughter in his voice. He even waggled his eyebrows to tease.

“Oh, shut up.” Siruko glared at his friend. “Yeah yeah, my two new nice neighbors are hot, but they wouldn’t want to do anything with me, the lonely guy with 3 kids to raise.”

Gzira sighed. “Siruko-san, don’t talk about yourself like that. Any guy or girl would be lucky to have you! You’re smart, attractive, and really kind.”

Siruko smiled sadly. “Thanks, Gzira-kun.” He made one last final check. “Okay, who’s ready to go to the park?”

“Look, Quartetchi, the airplane is coming!” Siruko made engine noises and tried to feed the baby the mashed sweet potato, but the gray baby stubbornly turned his head away. “C'mon, Quartetchi! Jiraichan ate it just fine! Look, it’s delicious!” Siruko made the show of eating it, gagging slightly at the texture. Quartetchi pounded the table with his chubby fist and cackled at that.

Siruko mock-glared. “Sometimes I think you’re just messing with me on purpose, my cute yankee baby.” Quartetchi just blew him raspberries and laughed at his own spit flying. Jiraichan gurgled.

He heard a knock on the door and sighed. The babies look at him curiously. “This battle isn’t over.”

He opened the door to see a smiling Mintosu. “Oh, hi Minben-san!” Siruko greeted.

“Hey,” the green-haired man greeted back. “Some of your mail was dropped in my mailbox, so I thought I’d give it back. Here you go.”

“Thanks.” Their fingers brushed again, and Siruko felt the electricity. Just then, peals of laughter came from the kitchen, and Siruko smiled fondly despite himself.

“Were those the babies?” Mintosu asked curiously, reflecting Siruko’s smile. “Ah, your wife must be there too.”

“Oh nonono, I don’t have a wife. Just the single dad, I guess.” He shrugged.

“Hmm..” Mintosu nodded, considering. He seemed to perk up at Siruko’s words, though the purplehead doesn’t have any idea why.

Just then, they heard the sound of a door opening and they both looked. “Oh hey, Siruko-san!” Sensei greeted cheerfully, then frowned upon seeing the guy in front of purplehead. “Mintosu-san.”

Mintosu seemed to deflate a little too, glaring slightly. “Sensei.”

Siruko blinked at the sudden hostility and cold atmosphere between the two guys.“What’s up, Sensei?”

“I’m fine, thanks for asking. And you? The kids?”

“My eldest currently hates me because I tried to bathe him, and I’m negotiating with the babies over mashed vegetables, but everything’s fine! Thanks!”

Both meganes chuckled at him, and Siruko blinked. He wasn’t that funny.

“Listen, I gotta go to work, but it was lovely seeing you, Siruko-san.” Sensei smiled at him, then grunted to the other. “See ya pal.”

“Yeah.”

When Sensei left, Siruko asked tentatively. “So… you and Sensei are not… fond of each other?”

Mintosu sighed. “We’ve been really good friends for a long time actually. We just have an… ongoing disagreement.”

“Yikes.”

“Yeah…” The green guy pursed his lips in thought. “Both of us… want the same thing. Classic jealousy trope, you can say. It’s hard to explain.”

“Ah,” Siruko nodded, understanding. “I hope you two figure it out!”

Mintosu eyed him thoughtfully. “Me too.”

The next day, there was another knock on his door. Siruko has never gotten this many knocks on his door before.

“Hey, sorry to disturb you. I just… I think I baked too many cookies so I thought I’d share some.” Sensei smiled sheepishly, holding out a bag of cookies which looked really delicious.

Before Siruko could answer, Ichihachi appeared out of nowhere and clutched his legs. The boy must have heard cookies and came as quickly as he could.

“Is this Ichihachi-kun?” Sensei crouched so he could talk to the toddler. “Hey buddy, my name is Limone-sensei, nice to meet you! You want some cookies?” The blue guy handed him the bag gently. Ichihachi looked up to Siruko first for approval, then shyly took the bag. “Fank you tente~”, he tiptoed to peck the cheek of the teacher. Sensei broke out a large smile at that and patted the boy’s head. “Sure buddy!”

When Ichihachi ran back to the living room, Sensei stood up. “He’s so cute, Siruko-san. He must have you wrapped around his finger.”

“Yeah, you have no idea.” Suddenly, a cry rang out within the room, and Siruko panicked. “Matte yo, Sensei!” And he dashed to the nursery.

Jiraichan was crying because he just woke up, and Siruko sighed in relief. Lately, the baby was fussy because he was teething. He quickly tried to snatch Jiraichan up so that Quartetchi won’t wake up, but it was too late. Quartetchi started crying when he saw his brother crying.

“Right, good morning everyone. Hai hai, I’ll go get some milk.”

“Sorry, Ichihachi dragged me in. Are those babies?” Sensei said, making Siruko jump a little. He had honestly forgotten he was talking to Sensei earlier. “Ah, do you need some help? I can carry one of them, I know how to hold and everything.”

“Aaah, jyaa, can you hold Jiraichan for a second? I’ll just go get the bottles.” Siruko handed him the pink baby, who stopped crying when he saw Sensei. Siruko was actually nervous inside, anticipating the reaction of the baby while he got Quartetchi out of the crib and calmed him down.

Sensei bounced the baby twice in his arms, cooing a little. Jiraichan suddenly broke into a toothless smile and babbled happily. “Dada!”

Both Siruko and Sensei lifted their eyebrows in surprise and their eyes widened. “W-was that his first word?” Sensei whispered in awe.

“Y-yeah. I usually call myself ‘Otouchan’ so I don’t know where he got that. Actually, I’m a bit jealous.”

“Wow.” Sensei mouthed. The baby poked Sensei’s cheek to get his attention, and Siruko could see Sensei swooning for the baby. Actually, he also might be swooning for Sensei right now. Oh no.

“This is awesome! Thanks for letting me hold him, Siruko-san. And yes, it’s nice to meet you too Jiraichan.” Sensei kissed the baby’s forehead, and yep, that does butterflies to Siruko’s stomach.

This isn’t good.

A week later, at around 8:30 in the evening, there was another knock to his door. Seriously, was the doorbell not working?

“Hey, I’m really sorry about this. I got locked out of my apartment, and I really need a place to crash. I’ll get my keys tomorrow morning, don’t worry.” Mintosu greeted with his usual ramble and Siruko just chuckled.

“Of course, you’re welcome here!” He opened the door and led him to the sofa. “Sorry if the babies cry or anything.”

“I don’t really mind, I’m just glad I don’t have to sleep on my doorstep tonight.”

Just then, Ichihachi, who just finished dinner, came to the living room. “Can I watch Pokemon now Touchan?”

“Oh sure, kitten, come here.”

“Hey lil guy! I’m Minben-san, nice to meet you! You like Pokemon?” Ichihachi nodded, and Mintosu fished something out of his bag.

“Tada! Do you wanna play together?” He held up his Switch, and Siruko snickered. He totally expected that the guy was a gamer. He had that aura.

Ichihachi glanced at Siruko again, and when Siruko nodded, he shyly trodded over Mintosu, climbing up his lap. Minben-san maneuvered him perfectly, then loaded the game. Ichihachi’s eyes widened like two plates and looked so excited.

“Oh no, he might erase your progress Minben-san.”

“No worries, it’s okay.” He chuckled. Siruko decides it’s not weird to like that. “Jyaa, is it ok to get some work done? I’ll leave the two of you there.”

“Sure.” Minben-san said. Ichihachi didn’t even look at him, too engrossed at the game already. The picture they made, his toddler, eyes fixated on the screen, sitting on the lap of his neighbor who was trying to entertain him with funny voices and teaching him how to control the character even though Ichihachi doesn’t understand a thing, is really cute and makes Siruko’s heart swell.

Wow, Siruko was able to actually get a lot of work done, and when he checks the clock, it’s already bedtime for Ichihachi. He arrives at the living room and stands there quietly for a while, observing them. Ichihachi was trying so hard to stay awake, but he was yawning and nodding off. The way he rubs his eyes was so cute, no bias. Minben-san was talking a lot as usual, but his tone was softer and gentler. Siruko really wants to capture a picture of this.

“Okay, time to sleep, kitten. Say good night to Minben-san and we’ll brush your teeth and drink milk.”

“G’nite Minben-san.” Ichihachi said, then pecked the guy’s cheek. Mintosu.exe stopped working and Siruko totally laughed out loud. He could see the exact moment Mintosu’s brain short-circuited.

Mintosu recovered though, and he kissed the boy’s hair as he let him down the sofa. “Good night, baby boy. Sweet dreams.”

“Sorry, I’ll just help him get ready, then I’ll go get your blankets and stuff. If you’re thirsty or anything, just raid the kitchen, I don’t mind.”

“Thanks, I’m fine.”

When he got Ichihachi all settled down and read him the bed night story, Siruko sighed in contentment. The young toddler usually doesn’t like people, and is very shy and withdrawn around them. Seeing him being very affectionate and attached to Sensei and Minben-san makes Siruko’s heart fill with warmth. Anymore of this cuteness and he might need to have his heart checked.

The baby monitor picked up some sounds of hiccuping and whimpering. Siruko hurried towards the nursery and turned on the lights to see Jiraichan having a bunch of Quartetchi’s hair in his fists. How Quartetchi didn’t wail out loud in pain and just whimpered, Siruko-san will never know. Poor baby, his mewls were heart-breaking.

“Hey hey, Jiraichan let go of your brother!!” Siruko scolded, prying the pink baby’s hands open. “You naughty kid, tsk tsk.” He immediately lifted the gray baby up and rubbed his back, trying to stop the poor baby’s sniffles. “Mou Jiraichan, we don’t hit anyone here!” The pink baby just pouted at him.

Siruko suddenly realized that Minben-san was waiting in the living room, and face-palmed himself internally. “Okay guys, since you’re awake, let’s go meet Minben-san. Be nice, okay? And no hair-pulling, Jiraichan.” He warned.

Minben-san was standing in the living room looking at the family pictures, and he almost dropped one when he heard Siruko-san, thank goodness he has quick reflexes and caught it before it shattered to a million pieces. He muttered a quick “gomen” before his eyes widened in delight. “Are these the babies?”

“Yeah. Do you mind holding Quartetchi? He’s crying because the little fairy psychopath pulled his hair.”

“Aww champ, it’s okay. Yosh yosh.” Minben-san took Quartet from his arm, and the gray baby stopped crying immediately and blinked at the new guy. They stared at each other, one with blank surprise, and the other one making silly faces. Siruko tensed, waiting for Quartetchi to cry.

“Papa!” Both men startled and stared at the gray baby in shock.

“T-that’s Quartetchi first word… and Jiraichan said his last week, he called Sensei ‘Dada’. Mouuu, why do my own kids not call their own father ‘Touchan’??” Siruko pouted jealously.

Minben-san blinked his shock out and chuckled, not breaking eye contact with the baby. He swayed him lightly, sitting down on the sofa. “Nice to meet you too, Quartet-san. I’m honored.” He held the baby’s little hand with his finger and shook it.

A few minutes later, as Siruko fed Jiraichan with a bottle on the sofa while Mintosu was playing upsy daisy with a squealing Quartetchi, Siruko couldn’t help himself and asked. “So um… are you and Sensei…?

“Yeah… still in a fight.”

“Oof. Still? That’s why you came here and not there, huh.”

“Yeah. It’s… It’s probably our biggest fight ever, but both of us won’t back down, and the thing we want… it means the world to us both. It’s complicated.”

Siruko’s brows furrowed in contemplation. “What in the world could be so important to fight your friend with for months??”

Mintosu shrugged, and Siruko knew to drop the conversation. Both babies yawned loudly at the same time, melting both Siruko and Mintosu’s heart.

“Do you mind helping me put them back in the crib?”

“Let’s go.”

Later, when Minben-san put them down and kissed both their foreheads and wished them goodnight, does Siruko realize he’s screwed. His heart clenched painfully in his chest, suddenly longing.

Oh no, he’s in trouble.

“I have a question.”

Hakotaro was helping Ichihachi color his book on the floor, while Gzira was letting Jiraichan climb all over him on the sofa. Siruko was on the other couch, handing Quartet the big soft blocks for his tower. It was more of a tetris game at this point than making a tower, but Siruko encouraged the baby and clapped the whole time.

“Is it possible to fall in love with two guys at the same time?”

Hakotaro coughed out loud several times, earning a worried look from his nephew. Gzira opened his mouth in a perfect O.

“Are… are these the two megane hot neighbors?”

“Who?!” Hakotaro asked in his disbelief.

Siruko answered in a tiny voice. “ I… may have accidentally fallen in love with both my neighbors at the same time.”

“What?!”

“It… just happened?” Siruko offered.

“Why?!”

“Are you just gonna ask one-word questions, Hakotaro?”

“Ok ok, let me handle this Hakotaro-san.” Gzira placated. “Umm… I think it’s possible. Polyamory is not unheard of. You should talk it with them, if they agree.”

“What? No!” Siruko drew his eyebrow together. “I’m not gonna confess or anything like that. Are you insane?”

“You’re the one who said you loved them, Niisan!”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna do anything about it! Look at me, who’s going to date a sad loser like me with more issues than kids?”

Hakotaro and Gzira looked at each other in silent understanding. His friend sighed sadly. “Siruko-san, stop that. I told you before, anyone would be lucky to have you!”

“Yes, do tell your insecurities to shut up, Niisan. I don’t really like talking about your dating life, but all I know is that it’s not that hard to love you. You take care of the people important to you really well, and you’re wrong, because many people love you because of who you are.”

Siruko was really touched, but as usual, he covers up his self-depreciation with humor. “Awww Hakotaro, do you wanna marry me instead?”

“Ew. I do love you Niisan, but getting married to you would be the definition of hell.”

“Awww I love you too.”

Hakotaro face-palmed. “Of all the times to focus on the positive, of course you only heard the word ‘love’.”

Gzira-kun laughed and it was really contagious.

After that, Siruko-san tried to avoid his neighbors. He still greeted them, but if he suddenly had something to do or forgot something at home, his neighbors would never know. He avoided too much interaction, just casually talked and smiled. He even used the kids as an excuse sometimes. If Sensei and Minben-san looked confused and hurt, he pretended not to see. All to protect his heart from falling further.

After all, it was for the best.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Click this for Part 2~ Drop by my Twitter too! Have a nice day!!🌻

[purplesurveys]

962

Do you have a pair of Beat headphones? I used to have a pair. I mean it’s still around in my closet, but it’s completely broken now with the cable all given out and the cushion for the left ear has been missing for a while. I just don’t have the heart to throw it out because it was my absolute favorite pair of headphones that gave me good memories during a particularly shitty time in high school.

How was your week? A little better. I’ve gotten into the groove at work so I’m no longer shy when it comes to asking questions and giving inputs, and I’ve gained a better grasp of the workplace’s dynamic so it’s also been easier to communicate with people. Heavy life stuff is still around and it won’t be leaving for a while, but they were easier to ignore this week.

Are any of your electronics not working properly at the moment? Not really, but my phone’s charger cable recently stopped working. I have a backup that I’m using at the moment and while it’s able to charge my phone, it’s starting to fray and I’m not feeling too good about the wires that I’m starting to see hahaha. I just don’t know how to take care of my cables, guys. Anyway, this question made me paranoid so I took a few minutes to wrap a shit ton of electrical tape on the frayed area so I think it’s all good for now.

Are you excited to pick out your wedding dress one day? I like thinking about my wedding but I truthfully dread the wedding gown part. I’ve never been able to decide what look and style suits me best and I’ve just never been good at determining things like that. I like to imagine that I’d leave that bit to whoever my maid of honor will be, because I’d definitely prize a second opinion more than my own.

When was the last time you felt relieved? Yesterday, 6 PM when I exited the last Google Meet for the day. It was a Friday night and it meant my work week was over :)) I mean I love what I do, but Friday nights will always hit differently.

Does it bother you when an artist remakes a song that one has previously done? I wouldn’t say it bothers me but covers are definitely a hit or miss for me, with way more misses than hits. Nothing wrong with acts putting their own spin on an already existing song, but I’m personally the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” type when it comes to music.

What brand of chapstick do you use? I don’t use any mainly because I’m bound to lose them within a week. Same goes for other care products.

Do you really think someone could be perfect? No. Everyone has their flaws and that should be okay to acknowledge.

When was the last time you cried? Wednesday, I think. It’s been three days! I’d count that as an achievement. But idk, my sadness comes in waves so I shouldn’t be celebrating too early. I’m sure I’ll feel a pang soon and be crying again over the weekend.

What’s a food that you like every once in awhile but not often? Cake. Too sweet and rich; I wouldn’t enjoy eating it every day. What letter is the song you’re listening to under? Not listening to music, but I have a YouTube video on.

Would you rather visit the 60s or 70s? 60s would be the lesser evil, I guess. I would NOT want to live through Martial Law in the 70s...I originally wasn’t even going to go with 60s because I think the world was a bit chaotic at the time, but I think my country was mostly unaffected by the political/cultural things happening then so it’s whatever.

Are you the type of person that enjoys getting hugs? I don’t actively seek them out but it feels nice when someone likes me enough to extend their arms out to me for a hug. I haven’t been hugged for a while and I feel kinda empty.

Do your socks say anything on them? I think some of my socks have the brand name on them but that’s it.

Name a TV channel that only has three letters in it. AMC.

Have you found out who your true friends are? For now, yes.

Gray or Grey? I use both spellings for no particular context. I simply like changing it up lol.

Will you be buying concert tickets any time soon? LOL of course not. And I’m very picky when it comes to concerts that I choose to attend anyway, so I doubt I would’ve bought any tickets in the last six months even without Covid unless it was for Paramore or Beyoncé.

Have you seen the movie The Perks of Being a Wallflower? Did you like it? Nope, but everyone was hyping that movie up when it came out. It never really looked like my thing < Yeah pretty much. I feel like it’s such a teenage-y movie so I was never drawn to it. I also think it would be too triggering for my depression, so I’ve felt wary about checking both book and movie out.

Is there something you’d fall apart if you didn’t have? One of my biggest fears is to end up alone, so I always have to have some form of a support system to fall back into. I would be very lost if I didn’t have at least one person to rely on.

How many weddings have you been to? I can think of four off the top of my head. I was either a flower girl or a junior bridesmaid for all of those.

When you smile, are you confident? Most times I am; I like to smile. But sometimes I smile just to fake it and avoid any questions.

Have you ever not done something because you were afraid of getting in trouble? Yesss, all the time. I’ve always been all about following the rules and I’ve never seen the appeal in breaking them. That makes me sound boring but at least I’ve never gotten in serious trouble lol.

Was the weather beautiful today? For me it is, but only because I like the rain and cloudy weather. Others might find it bleak and sad, but I feel right at home.

Do you have to have a fan on when you sleep? Yeah, all year long.

Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? If I had my dream modern/brutalist home, grey would be soooo fucking perfect for the bedroom. 

Would you ever dye part of your hair blue? I’m open to it, but I don’t think it’ll be a good match for my black hair as both are darker shades as it is. If I could dye my hair I’d pick lighter colors like green or even go all the way to blonde.

Have you ever gone to a private school? Yeah, from kindergarten all the way to high school. Private schools here typically give a better quality of education and they don’t give off the for-lazy-spoiled-kids vibe that I always hear from private schools in other countries, which makes them the norm for middle and upper-middle class families.

Is Finding Nemo a favorite movie of yours? I have other favorite animated movies, but that doesn’t stop me from loving Finding Nemo. :) I would always tune in for the whole thing if it were on.

Does/Did your school have a uniform? I had to wear one in my first school, but I didn’t need one for college.

Turn on the TV. What channel are you on? No TV where I am. I think my parents are watching a movie on their TV, but it’s on Netflix rather than a channel.

Does your house have security cameras? It does not.

Does a popsicle sound good right now? Eh, I guess it sounds fine but I’d rather have a pint of ice cream. I think that fits better with the weather and the mood that I’m in today.

What’s your favorite exercise workout? My weight training class last year was a lot of fun. I always felt dead after every session haha but I definitely felt healthier. I wish the semester had gone on longer just for that one class.

What’s your favorite thing to do? Lol I love doing many different things < Same lmao this question is so vague??? My favorite thing to do these days is binge-watch Rhett and Link content, but I like doing so many other things too.

What did you do for your 17th birthday? I was with Gabie that day and we went to a local art museum, as well as to a restaurant that she had wanted to take me to.

Does your local Walmart have benches in them to rest? We don’t have Walmarts.

Was your favorite stuffed animal really a teddy bear growing up? I never had stuffed animals. Well I was given a few of them as gifts, but I was never into them and they always ended up being owned by my sister.

If your house was haunted, what would you do? Not even think about it. Just show them that I couldn’t care less, lol.

Are you good at swimming? I can do a few strokes and am pretty good at treading, but I'm prone to panic-kicking when I can tell that the water is too deep.

What’s worse: Slow internet or slow walkers? Slow internet is such a pain in the ass. Shouldn’t even have to be an issue in 2020 anymore.

What is the rudest thing a guy has ever done to you? Cat-called, whistled at, winked at, lunged at. One good thing about this lockdown is that I haven’t had to deal with men as much as I used to. Do you sleep with the sheets tucked in or out? Well I only have one layer of bedsheet and it’s the one that covers up the mattress, so it’s tucked in by default. I have a blanket to cover me up when I’m cold.

What do you do to fall asleep faster? I find a few videos to watch as that tends to make me feel sleepy the quickest.

Do you carry a bottle of water wherever you go? I used to have a tumbler/water bottle in college but I forgot it at the gym one day and when I came back for it, somebody already stole it :( It was such a handy water bottle because it kept my water cold all day, so it sucks that I lost it. I’m planning to buy the same model again soon.

Are you afraid that one day you might get cancer? It doesn’t really run in my family save for one grand-aunt who had cancer, so I’m not too worried. But I’ve accepted the fact that it is at least a possibility.

Are you a fast or slow walker? I like being in the middle. Slow walkers are annoying so I try not to be one, and walking fast just reminds me of my mom and how quickly she walks at malls when she’s supposed to be spending time with her family lol.

Do you usually have to wear a belt with your pants? No. They all fit me just fine.

Does it bother you when people’s underwear hangs out? Eghhh, it really does. I know it shouldn’t but it really does. I just feel like it’s so invasive and it gives me a lot of secondhand embarassment.

Are you usually the person to try new things with your hair? Not really. I like staying safe with my hair. The most daring thing I’ve done with it is get bangs tbh, and I don’t plan on going any further than that.

When’s your birthday? April 21st.

What age do you look forward to reaching? I don’t feel that way about any age. Whenever I reach ultimate satisfaction and security will be a good enough age for me.

Name a state that begins with the letter M. Minnesota.

What’s the first thing you do after a car accident? Think about how to tell my parents. D:

What do you use to get rid of bad breath? Brush my teeth, drink water.

What exercise do you hate the most? Pull-ups.

What do you do at a party? Drink, socialize, tell stories, eat allllllll the food ha.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #262

WoW will probably start to take over my life again tomorrow oof so expect surveys to slow down some.

What do you wish people wouldn't call you? The only one I don't really like is Girt calling me "kid." He doesn't mean it in a derogatory way or anything like that; he's just always called me that since I was a high school freshman and he was a senior. Now as an adult that's been through things I don't believe anyone deserves, it's kinda weird but more so frustrating as, regardless of his intentions, I somewhat feel belittled. I've never said anything directly about my discomfort, though, so it's my own fault. I just don't want to make him feel bad for doing it for years lmao. What do people say about your name upon learning it for the first time? They don't say anything; my name is very ordinary. Why did you choose the hair length you have? I have a few reasons. The biggest is because I was just bored of average, long hair, and the fact I was at the time having a very hard time with self-care. My hair would get incredibly knotted to where it was hard to even brush it sometimes. Makes me shiver thinking back on it. For my own sanity and ease, it needed to be gone. Also, with how STUPID hot I get, cutting it all off helped with the weight of my hair (it's v thick) but more importantly how hot it made me it the warm months. Zero regrets chopping it all off, omg. If your hair could be ANY color, what would you pick? At this very moment, I really want silver hair. Do you wish your hair was longer or shorter than it is now? It needs a trim. Do you think you're attractive? (It's okay to say yes =P) No; I think I wouldn't look ALL to bad if I lost some more weight (I've literally been on a weight loss plateau for two fuckin years). When I was perfectly healthy, I didn't think I was very pretty even back then, but now that I look back, I feel I was decently pretty. Not gorgeous, but. What is your favorite band? Ozzy Osbourne. :') What is your favorite movie? The Lion King. The second one is like directly behind it. Finding Nemo is also very precious to me. What is your favorite book or magazine? The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton and Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo. What is your favorite song? Ugh, this is impossible. I love way way too many. I suppose maybe... "Death Inc." by Motionless In White? Idk. What is your favorite color to wear? Black, duh. If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? South Africa because I want to spend time with and take pictures at the Kalahari Meerkat Project and especially pet a Whiskers meerkat. I WILL cry. Meerkats literally changed my life. So many people I wouldn't know... If you got the chance and wouldn't get caught, would you cheat on a lover? NOOOOO the guilt though. Someone drops a fifty dollar bill and doesn't notice. Will you tell them? Definitely. I'd feel awful otherwise. Would you ever pierce something on your face? I already have my lip and tongue pierced, and I did have my nostril pierced, too. I want more, particularly an undereye microdermal if I can switch to contacts... which I don't like. I think it'd look pretty dumb with glasses. Are you selfish? EVERYONE should be to a degree depending on the occasion. Doing what is best for you is not a bad thing. Are you mean to people who are different from you? Wow no. I find people "different" from me interesting. Do you make fun of obese people? By the BMI definition, I am one of those people. So take a guess? Do you eat when you're upset? I have to fight that extremely hard, because I usually do experience the impulse to comfort eat when I'm very depressed. I've gotten way better at it, though. What if you had to choose between feeding yourself or feeding your pets? I honestly don't know for sure what I'd do... but I think I would prioritize my pets, honestly. It would break me to watch them suffer and lose weight. What if you saw someone being beaten on the street? YOOOO I READ THIS AS "EATEN" FIRST. But anyway I'd call the cops ASAP. There's a possibility I'd intervene if I felt myself capable of taking on the assailant. What if it was you being beaten? According to the night terrors I've had beyond count, curse like a motherfucker and fight back while calling for help. Who's the most important person to you (related)? Mom. Who's the most important person to you (non-related)? Sara. What's more important to you, happiness or success? Happiness. What's more important to you, your happiness or someone else's? Depends on the person. List the ten most important things to you: Oh, yikes. No order: 1.) My peace of mind, health, and happiness; 2.) my family; 3.) my pets; 4.) my career future; 5.) my friends; 6.) a YouTuber I've never met lmao; 7.) my pebble from my partial hospitalization program; 8.) Teddy's ashes; 9.) the Mark mug Sara gave me sobs; 10.) and the RP site I'm on. Like if it disappeared tomorrow with all the profiles and history and stuff I would break the earth in half oof. Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No. Have you ever had your bedroom in a basement? No. How many times in the past week have you eaten fast food? Hm. I don't think once. In the house - shoes, socks, slippers or bare feet? Bare feet.\ Do you consider dogs inside or outside pets? Usually indoor, depending on the breed and the time of year. What’s your favourite piece of furniture in your house? ig my bed? Have you ever had a crush on a friend’s parent? Yikes no. Do you prefer carbonated or uncarbonated drinks? Sucker for carbonated over here. Favorite thing that you can see up in the sky? A full moon. Would you rather eat at the table or in your room? I'm so used to eating in my room. Do you like the sound of birds singing when you wake up, or is it annoying? I love it. If someone gave you a kitten, would you keep it? I'd love to, but it'd really be my mom's choice. What’s your ideal activity for a rainy day? Nap oh lawd. Favorite type of cracker? Cheez-Its. Banana sandwich... yum or yuck? Only yum with peanut butter. Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Spiders. Bagels or English Muffins? Bagels. Do you like to daydream about sex? I do it sometimes. Which of your parents do you laugh more with? My dad is really funny. Have you ever been to an open casket wake or funeral? Wake, yes. Who mows the lawn at your house? A family friend. Have you ever written a story from beginning to end? When I was little and was writing that meerkat story, yes. I started on the sequel but didn't get far. What’s a big turn on for you? Being genuinely interested in what makes me me. Actually wanting to know the littlest things about me. Just show sincere interest. Are you doing anything tomorrow? I do know I'm fuckin finally getting my laptop home. Does your car have a name? N/A Do you own clothes from any celebrity clothing lines? No, but a bitch is getting a Cloak shirt or hoodie at some point. Who was the last person you ranted about? My bitch of a cousin for being a disrespectful fuck when all my dying grandmother wants is to talk as a group with the whole family. I ranted to Mom though, not in the group chat because I'm actually mature enough to not talk shit when, again, all our grandma wants is peace and love between us at the end of her life. I was SEETHING. Know any magic tricks? I don't remember any. I LOOOOOVED those magic kits as a kid, though. Is there music in your head right now? Right now "Dirty Pretty" by In This Moment is on, so does that count as "in my head?" Would you like to become a dancer? It'd be very cool, most certainly, and due to taking dance classes so long, I tend to think of potential dances in my head when I hear like... any song, lol. I'd love to be one if I had the grace and endurance + no hyperhydrosis. Name one person of the same sex as you you wouldn't mind doing: Hunny I'm bisexual, there's a lot, lmao. Dream woman? Uhhhh. Maybe my friend Alon. She was like one of my first hints I wasn't straight, lmao. But idk, I find soooo many women to be attractive. What is the most gory film you've seen? One of the Saw movies. What a surprise, ik. Ever fallen down a hole? ZOINKS no. Do you work better in a clean or messy environment? Clean, durr. Do you know any vegans? Only online. Do you like bananas? I am VERY picky with bananas. They have to be perfect. My preferred ripeness lasts only like, two days. .-. What's a film you've seen that confused you? Oh boy, idk. I don't watch many films... especially if I'm confused and the plot isn't great, I'll stop watching. WAIT!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!! I went to see Warcraft when it came out and I was so fuckin lost just because the orcs' voices are so goddamn deep that I just sat there like "uhhhh sir come again????" I didn't play Classic, and I'm not great at remembering every aspect of the plot, so. I'm to this day p confused lmao. Do you ever wear black lipstick? I really only ever wear black. What is next to your bed? I have a white shelf to my left where I put my meds, a drink, the fan... that kind of stuff. My cat's food bowl is to the right of it on the floor. Are your fingernails dirty? Nope. Have you ever fell for someone believing you could "fix" them? Not for that reason, no. Describe a picture of yourself that you hate: LASKJDLKFJAOWJE my friend took a picture of me eating a hot dog once and joked she was putting that shit on Facebook and it was funny as shit but thank Christ she was in fact joking. Would you rather play a good or an evil character in a play? While I'd love to be the evil one, I'd probably make it too cheesy because I am a BAD actress. Has anybody ever lied to you just to impress you? Story of one of my "best" friendships. What's your favourite shade of blue? Baby blue, probs. Can you remember a world before iPods? I do indeed. On rides to school when I sat in the back, I would bring one of those portable CD players with me to play discs. Where did you go on your last date? I can't remember the place's name... Lume's? Something like that? Breakfast place in Illinois. Do people find you "cute"? It happens sometimes. Who does the best remixes? Oh idk, I don't pay much attention to this. Where do you get your news? Facebook, lmao. What social stigma does society need to get over? What DOESN'T it need to get over???? What was the last photo you took? Probably something funny on Facebook to send to Sara lmao. I will get memes to her some way. What mythical creature do you wish actually existed? As badly as I want to say dragons, I don't think it'd be a great idea, heh... Maybe dryads. What are you interested in that most people aren't? As of recently, TARANTULAS. I've fallen in LOVE with them. What's the most ridiculous thing you have bought? No clue. What sounds hit you with major nostalgia every time you hear them? The gem collecting sound from Spyro. It was my text ringtone on my last phone! I need to move it over to my current one. What was the biggest realization you have had about yourself? I was possibly the bigger villain than Jason in the breakup. But idk. What topic could you spend forever talking about? Gay rights. Which way should toilet paper hang, over or under? In the original patent, it was designed as going over. GMM knowledge. Therefore I find over as correct, BUT I ultimately don't care like... at all. I don't even really notice when I go in the bathroom. Are you usually early or late? Usually slightly early. What do you wish you knew more about? Politics so I could be a more helpful member of society alksdjfka;lw What is the most annoying question you've been asked? It's not really like, annoying I guess, but the closest would be just how frequently people see my lip ring and ask if it hurt. It's incredibly sensitive skin, and even if it wasn't, a needle went all the way through it. Like... guess. News flash: being stabbed hurts, lmao. Like I always explain that it's not awful, but duh, there is pain. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? Yummm chocolate. What was the worst phase in your life? 2020 thinks it's a bad guy, but lemme tell ya, shit's got nothing on 2016. Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? I hate sprinkles on anything. Just an annoying texture with negligible flavor. The last time you went out to eat - what did you order? It was just a milkshake. Do you have all 32 teeth? I'm missing two wisdom teeth that just never grew in. Do you know how to do the moon walk? Never tried. What is one of your favorite comedy movies? White Chicks. Has anybody ever told you that you have a good singing voice? Yeah. I don't think I do. Onion rings or french fries? Fries. Not an onion ring fan. Who is the best cook that you know? Sara's mom is great, omgggg. She's cooked things I generally don't like yet I wound up enjoying. Can you name 3 different dinosaurs? Let's see: Spinosaurus, stegosaurus, velociraptor. I was a dino kid, man, just gettin' started. *finger guns* What's the largest amount that you can juggle at one time? I can’t juggle. What was your favorite thing to go on at the playground as a kid? I'd daaaash for the swingset. Do you know how much you weighed at birth? How much? Ummm I think 6-something pounds? 7? Where do you spend most of your time at? At home. In my bed. Exciting stuff, y'know. What noise does your favorite animal make? If my memory serves me right, they have over 40 vocalizations, but I'd say barking and chirping are the most ordinary/basic. Have you ever fallen in the toilet when you were little? lol I don't think so. What is the best kind of mac & cheese? I'm a basic-ass Velveeta bitch lmao. Who is your favorite oldies band? Boy oh BOY, you're asking a classic rock/metal addict. Of course it's Ozzy tho. But I love soooo many!! What is your favorite farm animal? Pigs! Do you like to play Monopoly? I'm not a big fan, no. What is the most fun restaurant you have ever been to? I like the vibe of Buffalo Wild Wings. Or I just have good memories there. What size bra do you wear? I'm actually not sure. I haven't bought new ones in a while and I don't think the ones I currently have are the right size anyway. Do you have a ceiling fan in your room? No. Who was your favorite Sesame Street character? I don't remember too well, but I think Cookie Monster? What about Muppet? Idr. What was going through your mind during the presidential campaign? I am sadly paying no attention. What do you think of the Duggar family ( 17+ kids )? Could you handle taking care of that many children? Ew, hell no. I don't believe the number of children warranted in a family should be legally monitored, it's much more difficult than that, BUT RATHER I'm very firm about knowing when it's more than enough. Population control is a thing. NOBODY needs that many kids imo, not even close to that. So far, what is the number one, best decision you have ever made? How has it affected your life? Letting go of Jason/accepting life without him. It has made my life much, much brighter and healthier. Have you reunited with any old friends recently? Was it awkward, or just like old times? No. When was the last time you talked to your first ex? February of 2017. Wow... been a long time. How different is your online personality from your offline personality? I am MUCH more outgoing and talkative online. What are your favorite holiday-themed movies? Jim Carrey's How The Grinch Stole Christmas, Hocus Pocus, The Nightmare Before Christmas, etc... Do you listen to Christmas/winter-themed music when the season comes around? No. Is there anything that you do that’s potentially controversial? Yes. What is your most recent obsession? Most recent, whew, tarantulas. I'm really gonna try talking Mom into letting me get one when/if we move. Do you say “merry Christmas” or “happy holidays”? To you, does it really matter which one is said/you say? Do you do your best to remain politically correct? Instinctually, I say "merry Christmas;" that's what has always been said around me. I personally see zero problem in calling it whatever... Like just appreciate someone wishing you well. You get the concept, and that's all you really need imo. As for political correctness, I'm kinda... down the middle? Like I feel it's been taken way, way too far, but I see some caution in wording as wise. If you could relive one week of your life, which would it be, and why? Would you do anything differently, or keep it all the same? Ugh, my first visit at Sara's. I just loved it so, so much. I think I wouldn't change a thing. It felt perfect. Is there a part of your life you wish you could remember, but can’t? Sometimes when I take these surveys and they ask "how old were you when...", ha ha. Frustrates me. What was the last thing/event to trigger a painful memory? It was last night, actually. The Final Fantasy VII remake is out, and I started watching a YouTuber I like play it. Jason got me to play the original, playing it a lot when we spent time together, but I only got a bit beyond half-way through before my PS3 broke. Cherished memories, so it was decently triggering indeed. I loved the game though and ABSOLUTELY want to see it played out in its entirety, so I shoved past the pain and am glad I did. Now I'm anxiously awaiting the next video aljkdsjfawe Y'ALL I wanna play more FF. What do you think of people that choose not to vote? I can't say anything, seeing as I never have voted before... Are you keeping anything from the people you love? Nothing important, no. Have you ever written a suicide note, whether joking or not? Yes, and that stupid novel is one of my biggest regrets. Who the FUCK would joke about that, though. When was the last time you let something ‘go to your head’? Not even like an hour ago. This happens allllll the time. When are you most likely to show off? Maaan Guitar Hero used to be good for that shit, ha ha. I was an expert at that back in its day. I haven't played it in forever, and on the rare occasion I do, I am suuuper rusty. Which would you prefer: spectacular view of the ocean, or of the mountains? MOUNTAINS!!!!!! Do you follow any dating rules/play any dating games? No. When was the last time you felt extremely confident about something? ME????????? CONFIDENT???????????? WHAT A CONCEPT!!!!!!!!!! When was the last time you blew the seeds off of a dandelion? Wow, not a clue. Probably not since we lived at my old house and I would go on walks down the path. What was the last thing that happened that you couldn’t explain? Oh I dunno. What do you do with all of your spare change? I just keep it in my wallet. Where did you hear about your all-time favorite band? He was and still is one of my mom's favorites! How many cans of soda do you drink in a day? AHHHHHH soda is my biggest nutritional weakness. I refuse to let myself drink more than one a day now though. It's funny and disgusting, when I was HEALTHY AND SKINNY I could on a rare occasion start a fourth can in a single day. Nowadays the thought almost makes me shiver. What is the oldest thing that you own? and the newest? The oldest thing, ummm. Not sure. Probably a stuffed animal in the attic. I just got two new books today! Is there anything you wish you had never found out about? Yep. A number of things. What is something that you refuse to believe in? Astrology. What is something you wish more people believed in? Gay rights. What food is your ultimate comfort food? Ice cream. Have you ever put anything inside a time capsule? What? OMGGGG I remember doing this in elementary school as a class! I don't recall what was in it, though. Is there too much violence on tv, or are people to sensitive? Too sensitive, but also negligent. It's got a lot to do with raising, imo. Don't show kids wild shit at too young of an age, and when they are shown this kind of stuff, you make it obvious that the behavior/content is unacceptable irl. Entertainment is not responsible for someone's shitty actions made with their own volition. What is something you used to fear, but no longer do? My first huge fear was thunderstorms. Now I enjoy them lol. Do you think it’s important to know a 2nd language? Not mandatory, no. Especially depends on if you're going anywhere. Do you know anyone that’s just naturally good at almost everything? My old friend Hannia IMMEDIATELY came to mind. She was the best in class GPA-wise, first chair for flute in band, and just in general STUPID talented. Do you know anyone that’s just bad at everything? BITCH ME What is one emoticon you use often? A sarcastic :^) or <3 What is one emoticon you almost never use? A lot, particularly ones with equal signs for eyes.

[chaosprince-apollo]

NB people as planets 💕

NEPTUNE: shops almost exclusively in the men’s section, owns at least three pairs of sexy lingerie for special occasions, reading list a mile long and their still on the first one, has seen every god damn mission impossible and fast and the furious movie and they really aren’t sure why, can’t cook to save their lives but they keep fucking trying anyway.

MARS: clothes are either five plus years old or from obscure thrift shops that nobody has heard of, owns every shade of lipstick imaginable but only ever puts on one colour once in a blue moon, likes to take midnight strolls amongst city streets, hates summer weather, has never ever ever played a video game in their life.

ERIS: has an entire bookshelf dedicated to ancient history and mythology, the floor of their room is utterly covered in random clothes and other miscellaneous items, favourite snack is flavoured popcorn, is a writer/artist but hasn’t created any content for about two years, shaves their hair regularly.

MERCURY: has a bowtie collection, can’t help themselves buying plush toys, may actually secretly be a witch, really fucking tired like all of the time, loves the feeling of twirling around in a cute skirt but feels shy about wearing them out in public, was a straight A student at school

CERES: loves anything with silk and lace, home is covered in fresh flowers, goes hiking on the weekends, them and their best friend are salt twins, Raven is their favourite superhero, constantly covered in paint.

EARTH : collects random cutesy figurines, really likes musicals and poetry, loves to wear jeans and baggy jumpers, has a group of friends they hang out with constantly and will barely communicate with anyone else, texts memes with no explanation, eats the weirdest possible food imaginable

VENUS: watches Queer Eye and Cleaning Up With Marie Kondo on a regular basis, will tell everyone who’ll listen that dragons are their favourite animal, can absolutely not stand being cold, loves to take bubble baths, only reads high fantasy novels, loves highwaisted shorts and oversized shirts, knows all the words to every disney song.

PLUTO: wears axe/lynx deodorant, every piece of clothing they own is black, writes the smuttiest fan-fiction you could ever imagine, has a star projector, has being in a Shakespeare play at least once (probably as the main character), thinks Legend of Korra is the best cartoon ever made and will fight you about it, really really really wants to own a sword but can’t afford it.

HAUMEA: constantly the shortest person in their friend group and they like it that way, plays acoustic covers of pop songs, likes to wear ribbons in their hair, tried to learn parkour one time and it didn't go very well, has random pride flags scattered around their house, has stopped trying to correct people on pronouns at this point because it's too much effort.

JUPITER: does all the work on a group project, has one perfectly tailored suit, owns a collection of high heels, loves to drink tea, really relates to the quote "cancelling plans is like heroin," prefers to tie their hair up but can never actually find a hair tie when they need it, doesn't own a car.

SATURN: has read every book written by Oscar Wilde, popular on instagram or YouTube, wanted to be an astronaut when they were a kid, only watches films with subtitles, always a little late for appointments.

URANUS: is in the STEM field, absolute loves puns, owns three or more cats, learnt martial arts growing up, sink is always full of dishes, has zero fashion sense whatsoever, puts stickers on their laptop

MAKEMAKE: funky socks or death! Seems really shy but won't shut up once you befriend them, can run really fast, likes to paint their finger nails, takes incredible photographs, has the best skincare routine, often gets lost in a wiki-binge and comes out with bizarre facts afterwards.

[lylvandam]

1/2 You write god tier Greed/Ling stuff so I just wanted to share, was listening to youtube recommendations and Affection by Cigarettes After Sex started playing... Well, imagine a modern AU where Greed has a band, guess he plays either a guitar or bass idk, and Ling is applying to be a lead singer or something like that. Greed's naturally been all high and mighty, showing Ling around his shitty band quarters like it was The Best Place in town and Ling was Highly Privileged to see it,

[2/2 but the moment they finally start jamming and Ling opens his mouth to sing Greed’s absolutely enamored, so much so he plain forgets to play his part and just listens, mouth agape how someone can sound that good. Ling in turn slowly stops singing cause he’s not sure if he should continue now alone, and then they just stare each others for a second, both confused as to why the other stopped singing/playing. Ahah yeah, idk if this was going anywhere. Anywho, have a good one!! Love your works❣️]

Sorry it took me a couple of days to reply to this! I got inspired and threw something together, hope you enjoy it, anon! (This is a link to the song in question BTW)

“I still don’t think we’re going to find the right one, putting fliers in a place like this!”The bar they were currently in was extremely not their crowd, full of students and grads from the local uni.“Come on Greed, now you’re being stubborn just for the hell of it. After the stunt Kimblee pulled we need a new singer and, as a group, we decided where to search for them.”

To Greed it seemed like it was Martel who was being obtuse just for the hell of it, but it wasn’t like he was ever going to say that out loud, he somewhat valued his own life.

“Have you seen the people that hang in this place, they’re so not in tune with our… way of living our life”“And now you’re just saying things”“No no I mean it, look around you.” He waved his hands at the room, making some of the horrible bourbon he was drinking spill from his glass (it was almost a miracle they served bourbon at all). “They’re boring, they’re… normal… They lack our vibe… our aesthetic. I don’t want one of these people as a singer in my band.”“If you’re waiting for someone with your same fashion taste to get a singer, we’re literally going to perform for the first time In the actual Devil Nest.”Greed looked at her.“You know, like the name of our band…”Greed kept looking at her.“and we’ll be performing in hell…”….“… Because we’ll be dead…”…“…From old age…”…“…because NOBODY IN THE WORLD HAS YOUR FASHION TASTE.”She shouted the last part.“You know that when you have to explain a joke five times it means it didn’t land, right?”“You got it the first time, you’re just being an asshole about it. Anyway, if it makes you feel any better this place has the only person with an edgier and flashier sense of fashion than yours, look” She gestured toward a small blond guy that seemed to be really into red, leather, and skulls.“The only one? You’ve met my sibling Envy, right?”Martel smirked at him but didn’t respond, both of them looking curiously at the small guy in question that was now near their flier.Huh, maybe they would get someone with the right vibe to audition after all.The blondie picked the flier up and took it with him at the counter where he started talking to a guy in a neon yellow shirt that seemed for some reason incapable of buttoning. They talked for a while and Greed and Martel didn’t even pretend they weren’t snooping in what was going on over there. They showed the flier to the bartender and the guy pointed right at the table where they were sitting.Shit.They both jumped in unison and tried to cover it by gulping their drinks way to quickly and starting a random conversation without really saying anything (they were never so in sync with each other like the times they embarrassingly got caught staring at strangers…)

When they saw the shadow of a person standing in front of their table they looked up to find, of course, the neon hipster one, looking down at them with the flier in hand and a hopeful smile on his face.Of fucking course.————————————–

“I would have made you more like a parent’s garage type of band.”The neon hipster guy (that had introduced himself as Ling, a name that Greed was desperately trying to not remember because fuck no he wasn’t going to have a fucking hipster as lead singer in HIS band) was snooping around the room they rented as a rehearsal studio/chillout place/ their own personal bar.The guy hadn’t rested a minute since they met him twenty minutes before, talking and smiling and laughing and flirting which was all very annoying because he really seemed to belong in a boyband (okay okay he wasn’t that young, he seemed even almost a little too old to be a grad student, but still)Greed couldn’t stand genuinely cheerful people. Except for Bido, but he was a special case. Nobody could dislike Bido, come on!

“But man, this place is so cool” neon yellow kid sipped the fucking whatever hipster Aperol cocktail he brought from the bar. (Yes, they were *that* fucking close to that godforsaken bar).If it wasn’t that they were getting desperate he wouldn’t have even considered letting a guy like that even see this place on a map, let alone let him do this unofficial audition.How did he manage to convince them to do this right now anyway? Greed couldn’t even remember.“Is that a Marshall amp? Whoa, you people don’t mess around! And this Fender Bullet, wow!”Okay okay, at least he did have some kind of taste in guitars…“Man I can’t believe I’m going to start playing in a place like this.”“Wait, wait wait, you’re not going to start to do anything unless *I* say so.”“Yeah yeah, sure.”Did he just fucking dismiss him with a wave? Him? Oh, this guy was going down!He took his guitar, now knowing exactly what he was going to do.“Anyway, this one is mine, Martel over there” he gestured at Martel, that was chilling with a beer on the couch looking bored (which was fake as fuck because Greed knew how much this thing meant to her) “is our drummer and you probably never going to meet the bass player and second guitar so I’m not even going to go there right now.”“It’s your guitar? It’s first rate!”Greed felt a strike of pride in its stead for the praise (it really was his most treasured possession) and almost didn’t notice how his shade had been ignored.Neon Yellow was indeed still smiling like nothing had happened and Greed wanted to make it go away. Oh, so fucking much.“We need someone who can hold on their own, so you’re not going to play with the band, you’re just going to play with me. No drums, no bass, no backing. This is going to be entirely acoustic. Is that alright.”“Fine by me” He took the mic and switched it on, and Greed did the same with his amp.“Perfect, You said you knew the three songs from the flier, right?”“Yup”“Then let’s begin with the Cigarettes After Sex.”And he started playing.Greed oscillated between strumming his part away, letting everybody in the room understand how much he wasn’t on board about any of this, and giving the brat the performance of a lifetime, just to make him understand just how much of a different level they were.He decided for the former and not because he also vaguely had a wish to impress him, with his ponytail and his face.Anyway, he did the intro in that casual impromptu way he had rehearsed so many times.Neon Yellow looked incredibly impressed there for a minute (in his face) and ecstatic instead of crushed for some reason.Then he closed his eyes and started singing.And then Greed couldn’t tear his own eyes away. As if watching him could help him appreciate the experience of the song more.The experience of hearing Ling sing, more.Because that’s what it was. There wasn’t any other way to describe it.Every single part of it was an experience that Greed wanted to never end. From the voice lulling him, to the confident tone, to the way the words sounded coming out of his mouth, to the lights and shadows dancing on his face from the headlights of cars passing on the street below, to the fucking neon yellow shirt.Everything was part of it.Greed had heard the song so many fucking times sung in so many different ways, and this was the first time he felt it, really felt it.And in that moment all he could think was, “I want him” not even knowing he himself what he meant by that.Then everything stopped.Midverse, Ling stopped, opened his eyes and looked up at him… confused, for some reason?Greed wanted it back.“Why did you stop!?”Ling seemed even more confused.“You… weren’t playing anymore? I didn’t know if…”Greed wasn’t…?He looked down and saw that yeah, his hands weren’t on the guitar anymore.He was so fucking caught in the whatever the hell that was that he had stopped playing.Well, shit.“I actually thought we were doing fine”Ling looked sheepish for the first time that evening.“Yeah yeah no. It was… okay I guess.”A snort came from the sofa…where Martel was… right, they weren’t alone, why had he been feeling like they were alone?“Yeah right ‘it was okay, and I just had an ethereal experience because of it… because it was okay…”“Shut up Martel.”“I was being thoughtful of you, Greed, I could have said, ’ and I almost jiz…”“OKAY LING WELCOME TO THE ‘DEVIL NEST’ YOU’RE OUR NEW SINGER NOW!”Ling beamed at him and Greed wanted to… nope not thinking of that.“Yes! I am so psyched! I cannot wait to see what we can do together…” don’t smile like an idiot Greed, don’t smile like an idiot Greed, don’t smile like an idiot Greed, don’t smile like an idiot Greed, don’t smile like an idiot Greed, don’t… “I mean, if the others are half as good as you, Greed, being here is going to be awesome!”Fucking Martel was snorting again (why could she always know what was going on!? so irritating)Also, if Greed didn’t find a solution to what was happening in his… head… right now this was going to be fucking impossible to withstand!But being able to hear Ling sing every day was worth it. (Even with Martel’s knowing smirk accompanying every performance)“I cannot wait to meet them! I also have to say that I have other skills up my sleeve, something I can bring to the table to make us get to the next level.” He took Dolcetto’s guitar that was sitting near him.“Oh yeah? You’re a decent player?”“Oh no nothing like that, I know like five chords. I meant, because of my father’s job I was always traveling around the world when I was a kid, so I’m fluent in a lot of languages.”Confusing but okay?“And…”“I lived in Germany for over a year, meaning I can speak German pretty well…”Oh no, he wasn’t gonna.“… meaning we can do this.”He did.He fucking started playing 99 Red Balloons.How was this Greed’s life?

[negasonicimagines]

(You kissed her.)

Hi folks! I am so, so sorry for not posting, like, at all, ever! I am trying really hard, I need to stop procrastinating and get on you guys’ requests! I’m bad at keeping track of which rqs are anon and which aren’t, so, if you wanna be tagged in your fulfilled rq, please include to tag @[user] because I copy the rqs into a doc! (this is also useful if you wanna be tagged but not as your main blog!) anyways, I wanted to mix up the writing style a little, sorry if it’s obnoxious!

request: “Can u write something like,Idk,the reader is texting Ellie and asks her to make a makeup tutorial for youtube and she actually films it?And she's all flustered and embarassed interacting with the camera?Sorry if this is too vague”

I tweaked this significantly, I’m so sorry, I just really struggled with doing it justice, especially due to the vagueness of it. But, I did appreciate the request and if you’d like to submit it with a few extra details I would love to write you a new piece! 

Additionally, this is my 30th NTW x reader imagine! Not my 30th published, but I keep my docs numbered and this is number 30! So, go us! 

So sorry for the long A/N! Please enjoy! 

(Text names are what you guys have each other saved as in your contacts!)

Ellie lost touch with most of her friends at home when she moved to Xavier’s.

(Most.)

There was one left, and if you’ve ever read one of these fics before, you know it’s you. Her best friend who she definitely doesn’t have a crush on.

Y/N ♡: Ellie!

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : What.

Y/N ♡: Your make-up looked really cute on the news today!

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : Thanks. Your point?

Y/N ♡: I was wondering if you would film a tutorial…? Please?

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : You don’t need a tutorial, you do makeup just fine. I saw your Snapchat story

Y/N ♡: Yeah, but I don’t do it how you do yours! I wanna learn THAT….

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : Tough.

Y/N ♡: :-(

Ellie rolls her eyes before leaving you on read. She’s so lucky you can’t see her face when you shamelessly compliment her like that. She gets so damn red, it’s embarassing. Whatever. She plugs her phone in and goes to sleep pretty quickly, not even dreaming.

The next morning, though, when she’s bored, she decides to create the video.

(Like it was a decision, when you were the one asking.)

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : Fine, I’ll make it. Can’t say I never did anything for you

Y/N ♡: Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

҉  ♥Ellie♥  ҉  : Whatever lol weirdo. Don’t text back I don’t want the phone to vibrate during

She suction cups her phone to her mirror, as she typically does so she can watch Netflix and do her makeup at the same time, but instead of that black and red app, she goes to the camera and begins recording.

“Hello, everyone. Or, just, y’know, Y/N. This is how I do my makeup. I start out with a primer, because I’m not completely stupid, then I go in with my foundation. Yes, it really is this pale ass emo shade. Then I blend it with a beauty blender, yeah, even I haven’t avoided that trend. And then this gray eyeshadow. And then the eyeliner, duh. And then mascara. Lipstick optional, but I’m wearing it tod- Oh! Oh my god!” She covers her mouth.

(Shocked.)

“Hey!” you tell her, stepping through the door. “Oh good, you’re actually recording. I wanted a video of us BFFs reuniting!” You wiggle your fingers towards her, and she rolls her eyes. You were the fun one, she was the grouchy one.

“What the fuck are you doing here?!” She remembers the situation.

“I’m not allowed to visit?!” you ask in reply.

“It’s kind of a long drive!” She argues, gesturing with her hands a little, and you shrug.

“Well, yeah, but when you’re moving somewhere it’s a good idea to visit first.”

“What?!” Ellie asks. “You’re a-!?”

(You nod.)

“What kind?! I mean, what do you do?!”

The people who overhear as they pass swear she’s never been this loud before, always responding briefly and nearly muttering her words.

You offer her a packet of sunflower seed snacks. She looks at you, confused.

“Take one,” you tell her. She’s always resisting.

(It’s cute.)

“What’s this got to do with anything?” the jaded girl inquires skeptically.

“Just do it, doofus!”

She takes one from the pack, and goes to crack it.

“No, hold it in your palm.”

“Y/N, you’re acting weirder than these jackasses think I am.”

“Watch!”

You close your eyes, focusing on the seed in her hand. She watches as a small green stem cracks the shell open, roots sprawling out as the stem grows thicker and darker, growing taller until the sunflower bursts open.

“Oh. My. God. Seriously?”

You crack open an eye nervously, smiling with the same tone. “Yeah. And…” You control the roots, causing them to make themselves into legs with feet at the ends. You make the sunflower dance, waving its leaves like arms.

(She just watches.)

Ellie usually didn’t speak as a choice, but in this instance she genuinely didn’t have anything to say.

(Until she realized that yes, she did.)

“Um, Y/N… Well, uh… Can you make the sunflower stop dancing?”

(No, that wasn’t it.)

“Oh, yeah, uh, here.” You hand her the gift bag she hadn’t noticed you’d been holding, and she peeks inside. It’s a bag of soil, as well as a black flower pot and plate set with silver skulls spray-painted on. “For the sunflower.”

“Nice,” Ellie comments, placing the plate and the pot in the correct position, on her desk in front of the window.. You dump some of the soil in the pot, and make the sunflower sit cross-legged, more roots expanding outwards to stake in the dirt before you add more. You take a water bottle from your purse and wet the earth inside with what’s left.

“Well, uh, I’ve gotta tour the campus. Kitty’s showing me around.”

“No,” Ellie immediately disagrees, jealousy rushing through her veins like it’s racing against her blood.

“Did I remember her name wrong?” You ask, confused.

“No, just- I’ll show you around. Tell her not to worry about it.”

You peek your head out the door and shrug, but then you nod.

Damn it, Kitty had been out there waiting for Y/N & listening the whole time? How embarrassing… Ellie thinks.

“Alright, let’s get the tour started, huh?”

The two of you go to exit, before Ellie realizes she’s (uncharacteristically) forgotten her phone! She stops the recording and locks it, sticking it in her back pocket.

You follow her around, listening to her explain the classes you’d likely take and what clubs there were in an exhausted tone.

“Is it really that bad here? Maybe I shouldn’t come…” you tease.

“No!” she nearly shouts,and you look at her with a mildly surprised expression. “Uh, it really doesn’t suck or anything, I’m just… You know… Like that.”

“I was kidding, Ellie, and besides. The papers are all in order. I don’t have anywhere else to go, anyway, my parents… Well, you know how that story usually goes.”

Ellie nods. “I’m really sorry. They seemed better than that.”

“It’s okay. Now I get to be roomies with… Well…”

Ellie’s eyes widen. “Me?”

“Yeah! You’re one of the few students who doesn’t have a roomie yet, so when they told me I could pick, I chose you!”

She tries not to blush.

(It doesn’t work.)

“Oh, jeez, El, you’re really red. You’d think with all that working out as an X-Woman, you wouldn’t get so winded after walking around a bit,” you joke, at least about the working out part. You’ve got no clue why she’s so flushed. “Are you okay? You’re not getting sick or anything, are you?”

“Sick of you,” Ellie remarks, though she doesn’t mean it. The only thing that makes her sick is her own cowardice. She couldn’t even ask you out over text, and now you’re going to be seeing her in person? She’s never going to admit her feelings, is she? She’ll die miserable and alone, just like she is now. 

(And people wonder why she lashes out.)

You giggle nervously, eyeing her expression. Most of the time you knew she wasn’t being serious, or, at least, not being honest, but you did worry sometimes. “Alright… Suppose I’ll have to find Kitty to give me the rest of the tour…” You turn around teasingly, waiting for her to stop you as you slowly walk away.

(She doesn’t.)

It hurts your feelings signifcantly. You don’t turn around, knowing you wouldn’t be able to hide it. You begin walking at a normal pace.

“Hey, wait!” she protests, and you return. “Listen, I’m sorry I’m kind of a dick. I try not to be a dick to you, but it doesn’t always work out, because I really like you.”

“Um… Isn’t that supposed to be… Not like that?” You laugh nervously, a bit concerned for her mental health and your own safety.

“I just mean that- Well- I don’t like being nice to people! It makes me feel weak! And I don’t want to be weak in front of someone I like!”

“Like… Like-like…?” You ask nervously, trying not to sound too hopeful.

(It doesn’t work.)

“Yeah,” she admits dejectedly, your hope most likely being obscurred by the metaphorical dark clouds that always surround her. Most of the time, people saw them as anger. You understand, though.

(They’re shields.)

“Hey. Did you miss my tone completely or something? It was hopeful.”

“Hopeful that I wouldn’t? Sorry to disappoint you, prince- Mmf!”

(You kissed her.)

[shannaintherye]

Little Lily Pad

Summary: Dan gets his wisdom teeth removed and Phil is there to help his loopy best friend.

Word count: 3.6k

Warnings: drugs (prescription), maybe swearing

A/N: I’ve been going through my ao3 and I decided to post this little one shot here. Please keep in mind that this is 2 years old and my writing has since improved. I still thought this was a cute idea, hence why I’m uploading. :) enjoy.

"Thank you for coming with me, Phil," Dan said, seated next to his best friend in the backseat of his mum's car. "I'm sorry you had to miss school, though,"

"Are you kidding? I get Friday off and I get to video you afterwards," he laughed, waving his phone teasingly. Dan snatched it, unlocking it, and taking about seven derpy pictures before Phil got it back.

"Set that as your lock screen," he laughed, pointing toward the one where he had five chins. "And you can only video me if I start crying about grass, not if I say something embarrassing."

"I'll definitely video you if you say something embarrassing," Phil laughed. He ended up making Dan's awful selfie his lock screen because that was their thing. They took ugly pictures on each other's phones and set them as lock screens. It was especially funny when someone asked the time and ended up seeing Phil's left nostril behind 10:36.

Dan was nervous, more so than he previously anticipated. He was chewing on the collar of his shirt, getting saliva all over it, a habit that he'd broken at a young age but picked up when his nerves were shattered.

He had to get his wisdom teeth removed, the two bottom ones on either side of his jaw because the teeth on top weren't causing a problem - the dentist said they probably wouldn't ever even grow in. His bottom wisdom teeth were a different story. Both of them were flipped on their sides and trying to come up. Wisdom teeth weren't very smart if you asked Dan, seeing as how they were growing in the wrong direction.

"Daniel James, stop chewing on your shirt. You're going to tear a hole in and I'll have to pay for a new one," his mother scolded, looking back at him through the rearview mirror. It wasn't even like this shirt was new or in good condition anyway. It was from summer camp three years ago when he and Phil went. Plus, it was the ugliest shade of yellow to ever exist, but it was soft with age and comforting to him.

"I'm just nervous, mum," he mumbled, pulling the shirt from his mouth. He cringed when the sticky-wet fabric rested against his neck, and Phil chuckled at him.

"It'll be fine. The dentists know what they're doing, sweetie," his mum said, and there was really no telling how many times she had told Dan that. He was so worried that something would go wrong and he'd die or have to get his mouth cut off. He wasn't sure how that would work, but he was detirmined it would happen to him.

His mum had to pick up Phil from school this morning just to get Dan to go to the dentist. If wasn't his fault that he was scared of surgery, and it definitely wasn't his fault that his best friend had a way with comforting him.

"It really will be fine," Phil said, placing his hand on the boy's knee. "And I'll be sitting right in the waiting room when you get out. Okay, little lily pad?"

"Okay," Dan whispered, nodding his head and then resting it on Phil's shoulder. He always calmed down when Phil used that nickname because it would remind him of the first day of Year 5 when he came in with his special notebook. He had finally been allowed to pick out his own school supplies, so of course, Dan had chosen the pretty notebook with a pond sporadically covered in green lily pads with pink blossoms on top.

Nine-year-old Phil had complimented him on it, and had said, "I'm going to call you lily pad," and he had. The whole first week of Year 5, Dan had been known as Lily Pad in the eyes of Phil Lester. Now, the name was only pulled out when Dan was stressed or frustrated or distraught, and it never failed to sooth him.

He saw his mother smile in the mirror, but he ignored her, focusing instead on his best friend's soft scent and comforting touch.

Ten minutes later, and the car had been pulled into a parking space, Dan had been signed in at the receptionist's desk, and now the three of them sat in the waiting room, calming down the brunet as he worked himself up.

They kept saying it was okay, but he was literally getting teeth cut out of his mouth. Did they not understand that? He had heard so many stories of the pain, agony, and the aftermath of being put to sleep. The medicine made you completely crazy, and while it made for a funny video on YouTube, Dan really didn't want to be drugged out of his mind.

"Daniel Howell?" A nurse called, peeking her head into the waiting area. Dan stood up, and looked at his mum or Phil to come, but he knew it wasn't allowed for people to be back there.

"You've got this!" Phil called, just as the nurse led him down a hallway into his certain death.

Phil sat impatiently beside Dan's mother, alternating between bouncing his legs and tapping on the chair. He was nervous for his best friend. He was worried that something could go wrong or even just the fact that Dan would be in a lot of pain. Obviously he kept this to himself when said boy was around because he was already on the edge of a breakdown with his own nerves.

"He really will be okay, you know?" Mrs. Howell reminded, laughing at his jittery state. Phil nodded and sighed, grabbing his phone and connecting to the WiFi. He had to get the password from the receptionist, who scrawled it neatly on a Post-It-Note.

"Dan and Phil," she mused beside him, patting his thigh. "Both a bunch of worrisome boys." Phil laughed and nodded, knowing there was no use in denying it. He had been worrying about his best friend since they were in Year 5 when the boy had moved to Phil's school. They were both the ripe age of sixteen now and Phil reckoned that he still hasn't stopped worrying.

To keep his mind busy for next hour or so, he logged on to IFunny, and scrolled through thousands of pictures in the collective, saving only the dankest of memes for when Dan was in pain later. He even went to the trouble of making a few memes himself, and he would admit that a few of them were the funniest thing since Doge - which was Dan's all time favorite.

"What are you doing on your phone there?" The woman asked, pointing to a picture that he was currently cropping. He laughed a bit to himself and looked up.

"I'm making a meme for Dan," he said very seriously. "To make him feel better later, I hope."

"Is that what he's always laughing about in his room?" She asked, chuckling at him. Phil nodded and grinned.

"We're always sending them to one another. Memes make up about seventy-five per cent of our texts,"

Phil liked Dan's mum. She pretty much keeps up with trends and things on the internet, probably thanks to Dan. Other than that, she's also really funny and sweet and she always cooks Phil's favorite foods. More often than not, she sends food in Tupperware bowls with Dan so Phil doesn't have to eat the nasty school lunch.

Phil's mum works a lot, or she would fix his lunch, but that doesn't really bother him. He loves Mrs. Howell's cooking. And to be honest, he just loves Mrs. Howell. Well, he loves all the Howells, if he's telling the truth. Especially Dan.

"Phil!" Dan cheered, sounding like he had a major lisp. Phil blamed that on the fact that his mouth was full of gauze, his cheeks were swollen, and probably numb with medicine. His mouth wasn't the only thing affected, though. His entire body was limp as they pushed him through the waiting room in a wheelchair. His eyes were wide, though, like everything around him was new and magical.

"Hey, buddy," Phil chuckled, reaching out for his hand. Dan flopped his own hand into Phil's palm and gasped.

"Your hand is so soft!" He said, dragging out the oh. "Just like peanut butter. Is your hand peanut butter, Phil? I'm so hungry,"

"My hand isn't peanut- Dan! Stop licking my fingers!" Phil scolded, pulling his hand away from Dan's tongue. His best friend looked at him for a moment, eyes and mouth wide open, before he started to tear up. Phil started to apologize because he knew the boy was hungry; he wasn't allowed to eat before surgery and it was already lunchtime now.

"I want a baby dog," he moaned, flopping his head back into the air, hitting the nurse in the waist.

"Easy there, honey," she laughed, patting his wavy brown hair before turning to the boy's mother. "The medicine should wear off soon, but until then, keep an eye on him. He might need painkillers, but only every 6 hours. Make sure his mouth stays clean and I would recommend only easy, soft foods. He will probably be in pain for a few days. Call if anything goes wrong,"

"Alright, thank you," she said, leaning down to raise Dan up from under his arms. He wiggled and stumbled while trying to stand, and started giggling the whole time. He was pretty much dead weight because he wasn't exactly controlling his limbs, which made getting him to the car a great deal harder for his mum.

"My legs," Dan lisped, wobbling as he walked to the car. "my legs are grape jelly,"

By this point, Phil pulled out his phone because he knew that Dan would want to see this later. He started up the video and watched as he almost fell trying to get into the backseat.

"Here, let me help," he said, handing his phone over to Dan's mum and helping the boy into the car. Once the loopy boy was seated and buckled in, he took his phone back.

"Phil! They put a pig in my arm," Dan said, watching bugeyed as his best friend got into the car beside him.

"Did they?" Phil asked, pointing the camera at Dan as the brunet pointed to his arm, where they had put the medicine in.

"Yes," he nodded, surely.

Dan's mum looked back at them through the mirror, and askerd Phil if they should get something to eat.

"Danny, are you hungry? Do you want some food?" Phil asked, and when his friend nodded, he turned back to the mirror. "Yeah, he's hungry. Maybe stop by McDonald's? He could probably sip a coke. Maybe some yogurt."

"Okay, to McDonald's then!" She cheered, looking back to gauge her son's reaction. He was totally spaced out, staring out the window and occasionally grunting of he saw an animal. Phil stopped the video, and watched Dan for a few minutes until his phone started buzzing.

"Dan, look," Phil said, tapping his thigh. The boy looked over and said, "what?" but it sounded funny with his mouth being so full. "Louise is calling. She wants to Skype."

"I forgot about Lou!" Dan gasped, staring at the screen as he swayed. Phil answered the call and was greeted with a very close up of Louise's face. She laughed and pulled it away, focusing it on the whole group: Zoe, her brother, Joe, and obviously herself.

"Hello, Dan! How are you, dear?" Zoe asked, making a funny face at Joe who had pushed her so he could see the phone.

"They put pigs in my arm!" Dan said, in a very serious and shocked expression. He bent his elbow in a weird manner so they could see the bandage where the IV had been put in.

"Are you sure it was a pig and not a cow?" Joe asked, humoring him. Dan nodded surely.

"Can't you hear them? They don't sound like cows at all," Dan said, getting closer to phone with every word he spoke. The screen was almost touching his nose. Phil pulled it away from him and told him to stop, causing Dan to stare at him.

Phil laughed at him and told him to stop staring, so Dan reached his hand out and put his fingers in the boy's mouth.

Louise laughed on the screen and said, "I can't hear the pigs, Dan,"

"Oink, oink, oink!" Dan mocked, as Phil pulled his fingers away from his own mouth. "That's what they sound like,"

Everyone on screen laughed, and in the background, the two boys could see someone walking up. Said someone was actually Alfie, who snaked his arms around Zoe from behind and kissed the top of her head.

"Oh, hey, Dan," he greeted, waving to the phone. "How is your mouth?"

"What's wrong with my mouth?" Dan asked, confused as he cocked his head to the side, looking like a chipmunk with puffy cheeks.

Alfie laughed and said, "You got your wisdom teeth out, remember?" Dan nodded then, shaking his head far longer than normal. He made an "oh" sound that he dragged out for a few seconds.

"They put pigs in his arm, did you know?" Joe asked him, turning to look at his sister's boyfriend.

"No, they didn't," Alfie laughed, before looking to the brunet through the phone. "Dan, that was just medicine."

"Ohhh, okay," Dan nodded seriously, then turned to Phil. "It was just the medicine, Phil. Not pigs. Oink." And then Dan was giggling and looking around like a baby goggling at a new world.

"He's pretty tripped out on drugs, as you can see," Phil said to the camera. Everyone nodded and Joe requested videos be sent to his phone for blackmail in the future. Obviously, Phil complied.

"Well, we best be going, lunch is almost over," Louise said, and everyone cheered their goodbyes and well wishes to Dan, who couldn't stop smiling and mumbling something about how sweet everyone was.

"Oh, Lou! Before you go," Dan said, right before Phil clicked off. "Your skirt is so pretty. It's purple just like Phil's eyes!"

"Dan, her shirt is blue," Phil said, chuckling a bit at how slurred Dan's words were. The brunet's eyes started to well up and Phil was sure he was going to start crying.

"But it's purple, Phil. Just like your eyes," Dan whined, touching his friend's cheek bone, right beneath his left eye.

"Okay, Dan, yeah, you're right," Phil soothed, and everyone on the screen agreed that Louise's skirt was purple instead of blue. "Please, don't cry, sweetheart,"

"Okay, Philly," Dan said, and nodded, then layed his head on Phil's shoulder.

"We're gonna go," the so called purple-eyed boy said, waving at everyone and saying goodbye. Dan waved, too, while sticking his tongue out and wiggling it around. Phil ended the call and put his phone down, rubbing Dan's leg.

"I have a tongue, Phil. Look!" Dan said, pushing it out of his mouth again. The other boy laughed and poked it.

"You sure do, Dan."

One half empty cup of coke later and the three were finally back to Dan's home. Phil had just decided to stay the weekend to help care and comfort his best friend.

The medicine had started to wear off, so Dan was beginning to act normal again, which was a blessing and curse at once. He definitely didn't like feeling so out of it, but his mouth was really starting to hurt. Luckily his mum had picked up his prescription painkillers and had already dosed him accordingly, but he didn't want to do anything. At all.

At the moment, he was watching a movie with Phil, laying across the couch with his head on his friend's lap. He always liked the fact that they were very touchy with each other. Phil always rested his hands on Dan's legs or played with his hair when watching films and Dan liked to play with the boy's fingers when they talked.

He shivered as pale fingers carded through his dark brown hair, twirling softly at the ends.

"These drugs are good," Dan laughed, now that the pain was subsiding.

"I need some of whatever you had earlier. You thought they put pigs in your arm," Phil teased, bopping Dan's nose.

"Shut up, I couldn't help it," he blushed, pushing his head down to press against his friends lap.

"You thought my eyes were purple, and cried when I tried to tell you different," Phil was laughing at him now, remembering the events. He pulled his phone out and showed the video of Dan trying to get in the car and saying his legs were jelly.

"Oh my god," the brunet said, hands covering his face in embarrassment. "Send that to no one."

"Too late. I've sent it to everyone," he said, shaking his head at the boy below him.

"Here, look through these," he said before Dan had a chance to reply. He pulled up his camera roll and passed his phone to his friend. "I saved a bunch of memes for you. I even made some when I got bored,"

Dan laughed until his mouth hurt again, and laughed more when he dropped the phone on his face. Twice. He decided that Phil was probably the best friend he could ask for. Who else was gonna make him memes and take care of his whiny ass when he got his teeth cut out?

Dan knew the answer to that, and other than his mum, it was no one.

Dan's mum cooked a lovely meal of lasagna and garlic bread, with Caesar salad on the side - which was sadly Dan's favorite food, but it was also Phil's and that's why she made it. Dan's father arrived home a few minutes before dinner, to find his son sprawled out on the couch, groaning because he was starving but his mouth hurt too much to eat and honestly, the mug of warm tea on the coffee table was not filling him up.

Phil felt sorry for him because his best friend hadn't eaten a day, and Phil would've brought him food, but he didn't think that was a good idea when talking alone hurt Dan's mouth. So, he sat at the dining table with the two adults - who were practically his parents, too - and ate a delicious supper.

"This really is good," Phil complimented, already on his second plate.

"Thank you, dear," the woman said, a sincere grin on her face. Phil knew that she loved being complimented on her cooking. "I just wish Dan could eat," she said it with a sigh.

From the living room, a groan of agreement was heard. Phil laughed.

"I think he agrees," Phil stated. Dan moaned again and everyone chuckled.

"We'll save you some leftovers for tomorrow, son," Dan's father called, and it was kind of funny in the way that it shouldn't it be funny. Why were they laughing at Dan's discomfort and why was it even funny? Just the situation itself was frustrating, especially for Dan, who was also laughing miserably as he walked into the kitchen.

"You guys are mean," he pouted, flopping down beside Phil and in front of his dad. "I'm dying over here and you're laughing at my pain as I suffer,"

"Oh, stop being so dramatic," his dad mused. "You're worse than your mother."

"I'm not dramatic in the least," she huffed, and everybody laughed because they knew it wasn't true.

Going to sleep was proving to be difficult for Dan. He couldn't get comfortable because he had to lay on his back. You see, Dan likes to sleep on his side, facing the door, but his mouth was so sore that even laying on his cheeks hurt.

"Stop tossing," Phil mumbled, groaning as he turned to face Dan. They always shared a bed when staying over at each other's houses because there was no way they were making the other sleep on the floor or the sofa, and secretly, they love to be close.

"I'm sorry," Dan huffed sarcastically, flipping over on his back again, moving his legs to rest atop of Phil's under the covers. Whenever his best friend is sharing a bed, he can't go to sleep unless he's somehow touching Phil. "It's not like I can help the fact that I got my teeth cut out of my face today and guess what, it didn't exactly feel pleasurable,"

Phil frowned sympathetically, and rubbed his hand over Dan's in comfort, saying, "You're right, I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Dan said, lolling his head over to press it against Phil's shoulder, closing his eyes. "I'll try and sleep,"

It was funny how Dan could never get angry at his best friend. If anyone else, Joe, Louise, or Zoe had fussed at him for tossing, he would've gotten aggravated, but all Phil had to do was touch him or use his gentle voice, and Dan was putty in his hands - any shred of anger, gone with a snap of the fingers.

Dan smiled in spite of this, though, because he secretly liked it.

Sleep was starting to take over now, beckoning him closer after the day's tiring events. His breathing got deeper as his thoughts became hazier with each second passing.

"I love you, Phil, do you know that?" He asked, half of the words mumbled sleepily.

"Obviously. I love you, too," Phil said, and his fingers began caressing at Dan's hand again, pushing him closer to the edge of unconsciousness.

"But, not like you do," He argued, eyes closed and teetering between sleep and awake. "More than a friend is how I love you,"

"I know, Dan. I love you, too," Phil hummed, turning his head to kiss the brunet's hair. "Good night, little lily pad."

[charlottestarchild]

Figs and Charlotte

It’s 2018 and I am visiting my good old friend in a small remote village in the south of France. I haven’t seen her in years and can’t wait to spend some quality time with her. She’s staying with her kids at her parent’s place so I booked myself into a small, and as it turns out quite cute, B&B close to her place. The village is famous for its clay pottery and so it happens that the B&B is in an old pottery fabric. Everything is the color of terracotta. My friend’s parents grow grapes and have a lovely fruit garden. We go pick peaches, apricots and figs fresh from the tree each day … On the morning of the second day, I take my plate full of fresh fruit and walk to the little terrace in the backyard of my room to sit in the sun and enjoy my fruits. Walking up the concrete stairs to the little terrace, I catch a glimpse of a guy lying on the ground, earphones in his ears, doing yoga. I hesitate for a moment but then decide to go back. I would basically need to step over him in order to get to the chairs. Way too shy and respectful of his privacy for that.

Saturday night. The kids are at sleep. Maria and me decide to enjoy some quality time. We grab a bottle of wine and simply drag out some chairs from my room onto the street and set up our own little private bodega on the street. We’re drinking lovely wine and are chatting about all sorts of things. We have plenty to catch up. Suddenly the sound of a Ukulele gets to our ears from one of the windows above. Portuguese? She says and looks at me. I try to listen. Yeah. Sounds like Portuguese. We giggle a bit and continue chatting. The sound gets louder and suddenly you can hear two voices sing. We listen for a bit, suddenly the music stops. We look up at the window where the music came from and the guy from the morning appears in the window. “Hi” he says waving down to us. “Hi” we say back.

We keep chatting about her marriage, about my divorce, about live here and there. Suddenly Mr. Portuguese Ukulele Yogi walks down the street. We start chatting about how we heard him sing in Portuguese. He’s Brazilian so yes, it was Portuguese. He says he’s visiting his friend who is staying here. Two minutes later also his friend comes down the street. A funny looking guy in dangaroos, his colorful socks pulled up towards the knees, his dark beard shaved in a funny way, one long earring dangling from his left ear. After a bit more chit chat I ask if they don’t want to join us. “We have some more chairs we can pull out”. Without hesitation they agree. Fernao, that’s the name of the Brazilian, is tall, curly wild hair, glasses. Looks a bit nerdy. Not as hot as I thought from the glimpse I caught of him in the morning but still quite cute. Sami, is from Iran but lives in Austin, Texas, he is into pottery which is why he is here in this village; he starts telling us how he got totally hooked on it by watching YouTube videos and now he finds himself here, learning from the best of the best. He’s a storyteller, that much is clear. I like story tellers. He’s much shorter than Fernao, but has very dark, mysterious eyes.

We chat about things for a while when Maria suddenly gets a phone call. Her daughter has fever. She has to leave. I’m sad she has to leave. It was so nice catching up and even now, talking to these strangers together as if we were on a holiday somewhere together in our early 20s.

I stick around and chat some more with the two guys. I can’t really say what they’re up to. Sami makes me a compliment suddenly about how beautiful my face is. I have to laugh cause at this point of time I consider my face anything else but beautiful. I look over to Fernao, shrugging in his direction as if to say “what’s wrong with your friend”. We keep on drinking wine and talk about space, aliens, nature, random encounters. I ask if either one of them smokes and Sami gets up getting his tobacco from his room. We smoke. We drink wine. We talk. Cats join us. Sami feeds them so they stick around meowing for more food. Suddenly without any clear reason why, we all get up and there’s a sense of “party is over”. We all take the chairs inside, clear up the stuff, hug each other good night “was nice to meet you”.

Somehow, I’m relieved I didn’t end up in bed with either one of them. Not that there would have been clear interest from their side anyways but I’ve been having a bad conscious about my promiscuous lifestyle lately and that would have been too much. And I’m here to visit my friend and not to fuck around. Good girl.

The next morning I’m about to hop into the shower when someone knocks on my door. It’s Fernao. He’s got no shirt on. I’m only wrapped in a towel. “Good morning!” – “Good morning”. “Sami and I are planning to go to this remote beach today. We have a rental so we can drive around. I was wondering, well, I’m sure you have plans but if not, if you’d like to join us.” I explain that I don’t know because I need to wait for Maria to contact me. Her daughter has fever so I don’t know what’s going to happen. “Ok sure, well, let us know or at least come up for a coffee anyway.” “Sure.”

I get into the shower smiling.

I make myself another fruit plate and go to the terrace upstairs. Fernao is again there doing Yoga. But this time I dare to pass him and sit on one of the sun chairs. We chat a bit. He continues his yoga. Tells me how yesterday he got up at 7am and did a 3 hour yoga session. This place energizes him. Maria calls. Her daughter had bad fever last night and her sister’s dog died. I tell her not to worry about me, she should be with her family. I will go to the beach with the guys.

Within a few hours we are on our way to the beach. It’s a bit of a drive but eventually we get there. The beach can be reached after walking for about 15min through sand dunes. It’s scorching hot. Fernao is carrying his botijo with him. Sami carries his Ukulele and a football.

We get to the beach. It is anything else but remote. It’s filled with people. Naked people. It’s a nudist beach. I make nervous jokes, how funny it is that we think we’re going to some remote beach and we end up at a nudist beach. “Well, it’s not like we were going to wear swim wear at a remote beach anyways”, Fernao says. It doesn’t take 5min and both of them are butt naked. Great.

First round of swimming I leave on my bikini. But when Fernao starts to make handstands and wheels in the sand with his shlong dangling around I feel seriously overdressed and tell myself “ah what the fuck”. I take off my bikini. I’m not exactly comfortable with my body in broad sunlight. My boobs are tiny and my nipples are ugly when they’re not hard. But well. It’s not like those two are carved out of stone either.

I don’t exactly remember when but at some point I realize that Fernao is flirting with me.

I lay on my stomach, taking in the full sun. Fernao starts touching my back. I don’t know why but it makes me insanely horny. We swim, we eat, we drink beer, we swim – life could be worse. At some point Fernao is playing the Ukulele and Sami starts to massage my feet. And I’m lying there on my back wondering HOW DID I GET HERE? How am I here? On this beach, with these guys? By the way, not sure this is clear but they are both really nice fellas. Not dodgy at all. Just really nice, funny guys.

I did start to think at some point if they have some twisted plan of luring me into a threesome. For a second I am wondering if I could be convinced but no. Seems a bit much.

We go for another swim. It feels great to jump naked in the waves.

It’s getting late and I start to have a bad conscious about having fun here with these guys while Maria needs to deal with her sick daughter and a sad sister. I tell the guys that I need to get out of the sun; maybe we could start thinking of going back soon? They don’t really seem to want to and I don’t really want to push for it, since it’s their car and I don’t want to ruin their fun. I say I go for another swim and then we see.

When I get back from the water, Fernao has explored the area in the dunes and says there is a nice place in the shade where we can hang out for a little longer. I agree. We take our stuff to the dunes and make up a camp. Fernao even brought his hammock… :D

We hang out for a little longer and decide to go back. Finally. It’s already 7pm or sth.

Once we’re back I get in touch with Maria and we meet for dinner. After that, I go upstairs to join the guys. We drink some wine, chat. Sami goes to sleep. I guess he noticed Fernao and me flirting with each other. Fernao and me have been caressing each other’s back and hair all day. I think it takes not even 1min after Sami left and we’re kissing. I am so horny. How does this guy make me so horny? My Argentinian and Colombian friends have been telling me how Latin American guys are just different. Boy were they right. We’re sitting on the sun chair kissing and Fernao is leaning in on me when suddenly the fabric of the chair breaks and we’re both landing on the floor. We’re laughing.

We get up and continue kissing against the wall when he asks: “Can I take you somewhere where I can take all these clothes off?” Yes please.

We go to my room. As soon as I close the door behind me, Fernao pushes me against the wall, holds up my hands above my hand, kisses me passionately and seems to have his hands all over me. He lifts up my dress, squeezes my but, kisses my neck. I wrap my arms around him, he lifts me up so I am against the wall, legs wrapped around him. I slide down, he opens the zipper of my dress, slowly slides it down my shoulders. I’m not wearing a bra. I’m only in panties. He looks at me and smiles. Takes my hand and guides me to the bed. We make passionate love until we fall into a soft slumber. A few hours we wake up, make love again…

In the morning, we wake up next to each other. He says “Yesterday morning, Sami asked me what I’d like for today. And I said “Figs and Charlotte””.