#anyway probably won't personal post much but just thought this was interesting n also not too dangerous to allow to be on the web forever | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

vividachromatic · 1 year

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A Dream We'll Never Wake Up From

Part 8 - 10

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Notes: Anyone who's actually seen this story on tumblr AND Ao3 probably already knows, that I frequently update the story there, but not really here. This is why I will post part 8 - 10 here now, but after that I won't post it on tumblr anymore. So I really hope everyone who is interested checks it out!

Also this last post about it on tumblr is a small celebration (yaayyy) for that the fact, that I completely edited the story to be gender-neutral and second person view. (Which took sooo much longer than expected) I wanted to make the story more accessible and relatable for all genders (: I also corrected several mistakes I've found and edited small details.

Anyways, like I said, this post will be three chapters, so it's quite long. If you'd like to continue reading, I'd appreciate it, if you'd check out my Ao3.

Warnings: There will be a NSFW chapter

Words: 7.314

On the same day, you did decide to watch a movie. You decided on the movie, since Nagito wanted you to and you didn't want to arugue, about something so meaningless. You just wanted him to relax.

You chose a calm movie you've already seen before and thought he'd like.

The movie was pretty boring though. And he seemed to think so as well, if his closed eyes were anything to go by. You wanted to see, if he was still awake, so you kissed him on his cheek.

He instantly blushed, but leaned in to your touch. So, you decided to spoil him a bit more, and pressed several short kisses on his cheek down to his neck. Nagito took a deep breath.

You didn't even do much and he was pretty worked up already. Like always. But you liked the effect you had on him. You wondered... how would he react, if you would go further?

When you kissed Nagito on his neck, you lingered there a bit longer. You really... wanted him to feel good, whatever it meant for you. During one of your kisses, you briefly licked his neck. He shuddered.

When he didn't seem to protest, but leaned into your touch even more, you began to bite and suck on his neck. He gripped your thigh for a second, but quickly released it again. He started breathing quite heavily now. Which was kinda funny, since barely anyone would get that worked up over a few kisses.

But Nagito was different. And you expected it from the beginning, but you really liked it. "Nagito..." you breathed against his neck during one of your kisses. "Y-yeah?"

You still wanted to make sure if he was okay. If this was okay for him. "Is this okay?" You whispered against his neck. You stopped kissing him before he answered. "Ha... of course. I'm... not doing something wrong, am I?"

You frowned. He didn't really do anything, so... was this really okay for him? "You're doing everything right, Nagito. Please tell me if you want me to stop." You said before sucking on his neck again. He quietly moaned, but quickly covered his mouth with one of his hands.

"Nagito..." you took the hand, he had on his mouth in yours. "If this is okay, please let me hear you."

Nagito started moaning louder after hearing that. You softly carresed his neck, while sucking on it. With one hand Nagito gripped the couch, and with the other he gripped your arm. "Y/N..." he gasped.

You brushed your hand over his chest down to his thigh and kissed his lips again.

You kissed him gently, but he had a hard time reciprocating the same way. The kiss quickly turned sloppy and he let out a quiet, pleased sound. As a response you softly pushed him back into the couch and moved to hover above him. Although the kiss was more feverish than usual, it was lovely. You haven't made out like this before. When you parted he slightly turned his head. You cupped his face in your hand and turned him to look at you. He looked unsure.

"Are you really okay with this?" He could't believe someone like you would actually want to be that close to him. Every time you kissed him, he felt like that luckiest person in the world, but that... was something more. He didn't know how long he could keep on doing that without loosing control. The last thing he wanted was to disappoint or hurt you, but he was also just a boy.

"If... you want me to stop, it's okay really."

He turned his head to you again and looked panicked. "Ah, that's not it... at all..."

"So you want me to continue?"

He gulped. Then he nodded. You smiled again. When you leaned down to kiss him again, you quickly licked over his lips.

He shuddered again and let out a quiet moan. When he understood, that you wanted him to open his mouth, he immediately did. Yoy eagerly explored his mouth, while stroking his arm.

Nagito never felt that hot before. But it was a good kind of heat, like a fire burning inside of him. It felt way better than all the times he would imagine you to touch him like this, because this time every movement was filled with love, instead of just desire.

He wanted you close and suddenly didn't think about wether or not you would pull away again. He only cared about keeping you close and holding on to this feeling for as long as he could.

He slightly shifted and bucked his hips against yours. You immediately knew what he was asking for and slowly started grinding your hips against his.

He gasped and broke the kiss and tilted his head to the right again. You stopped moving your hips and looked at him concerned, if he was still okay, he softly grabbed your wrist. "Please... don't stop."

Nagito was never that straight forward, so you didn't need to be asked twice. You started grinding your hips again and he gasped. You cupped his face and looked at him lovingly.

...still you were going way to slow for his liking.

He quickly turned both of you around, so he was hovering above you now.

He looked firmly into your eyes, which was rather unusual for him. But you just smiled back at him. You liked him like this. Over you. Taking control.

When he saw you smile, his eyes quickly softended and now he cupped your face lovingly. He continued grinding his hips against yours, but way faster now and much less controlled.

He moaned and sunk even more into you, his face right above yours now, with his eyes closed. When you wrapped her legs around his torso, he pressed your hips down with one hand to steady you. His movements became more frantic and hurried now. He closed his eyes and sunk his head next to yours. He let out all kinds of pretty whines and gasps right into your ear.

The prettiest thing was probably, that he didn't seem to want to silence himself at all. He shamelessly moaned into your ear, while his movements became quicker and quicker. You grinded your hips against his, too, but could not keep up the pace he was going at. You gripped the bedsheets next to you and softly whimpered as well.

You didn't know that something like that could feel so good. There wasn't any penetration, but you never felt as good as you did now.

Because this was Nagito. It felt so good.

Were they having sex right now? You didn't know if it could be called that. But you never wanted this moment to stop.

But at the same time you just wanted to finish. You felt like you were coming closer and closer and were always on the verge of realease. You've never come with another person...

"Nagito..." you gasped and gripped the bedsheets even tighter now. He responed by gripping your hips even tighter. It almost hurt at this point and if you wouldn't be feeling that good right now, you would probably tear up. "I'm sorry..." He whispered as feverishly rutted against you.

You suddenly felt the knot inside you come undone and gasped loudly in his ear. Almost at the same time, you felt him cumming against you.

Both of you were breathing heavily - the movie still playing in the background. He collapsed next to you on the couch, laying his head in the pillow next to you.

After catching your breath for a few more seconds, he shifted his head and buried his face in his hands.

"I'm sorry."

Despite still being out of breath, you immediately needed to reassure him. You softly grabbed his hands, so he had to look at you now. But he still avoided eye contact.

"Nagito, look at me." He hesitantly did and you smiled at him, while softly caressing his fingers.

"I love you."

He audibly gasped.

Sure, he expected you to reassure him at this point. Even though he was still scared of your reactions, your smile usually chases all his worried away.

But he didn't expect you to say this...

Maybe it was an accident.

But you smiled even brighter, when you saw his reaction. You cupped his cheek and repeated, "I love you, Nagito."

Nagito began tearing up again. You surely think, that he's a cry baby at this point... Maybe you'd grow tired of his reactions some day?

But you looked at him with pure adoration. Nagito always thought, you were beautiful, but in this moment... he doesn't think he's ever seen anything prettier.

You looked so... hopeful.

Like the feelings you had for him were really that pure.

So he decided to believe you.

"I really love you, too, Y/N." He smiled at you. Despite still having tears in his eyes, he looked so happy right now.

And he was.

Of course, there were always lingering doubts in the back of his mind, but... he allowed himself to push them away, just for this moment.

You closed your eyes and planted a short kiss on his hand.

He should probably not enjoy the way you were treating him.

He should probably turn away and preserve your dignity. It would be better for you.

But he couldn't.

He just couldn't. And he knew that he was so so selfish. But in that moment he just couldn't bring himself to care.

When Nagito came back to the class, he was actually welcomed pretty nicely. Even though that could have to do with the fact, that you threatened to expell them as well - what you couldn't even do - if they weren't nice to him. Most of them genuinely welcomed him. Even Hiyoko - who you had gotten quite close with, because of your mutual interest in traditional art - acted quite agreeable, for the fact, that she was Hiyoko.

"You're coming exaaaactly at the right time!" Ibuki exclaimed and threw an arm around Nagito. He was startled, but before he could further react, she already removed herself from him again and pushed something into his hands.

Several papers and tape.

"So! We are having a school festival and everybody's doing their best to collect donations in their way! That's why Hiyoko's dancing, Mahiru's showing her photographs I and Y/N are having a concert and because I can't think of anything you can do and you have the obligation as Y/N's boyfriend, you're putting up the posters!"

"Ibuki..." you chimed in now,

"What?? You said you agreed with me!"

"No, I said we could ask him. Not that you should push it into his hands..." you looked at Nagito apologetically, "Sorry... you really don't have to do this..."

"Oh, it's no problem! I am actually honored, that you want to leave such an important part to me!" He smiled.

'Important... part..?'

You sighed. You've expected him to agree, but you still felt bad...

"So, I think I'll get going right away then! If you'll excuse me-" He smiled and stepped away to put up the posters. You hoped he wouldn't trip or something when you weren't around...

"Was that 'I can't think of anything you can do' necessary?" You asked Ibuki as soon as he was gone.

"Seriously, you're not his mommy, you idiot! That guy is a freaking leech! No way, your relationship is two-sided. " Hiyoko, who was at the back of the room, helping to prepare the stage they would perform on, chipped in.

"Oh, I know!" She faked a gasp, "You just have some kind of weird savior complex, don't you?"

You didn't care about Hiyoko's blatant insult toward you, but you didn't like her misconception of your relationship.

"If you really want to talk about things like that, maybe we should first talk about your superiority complex?"

"What!? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Uhm guys, I think it's bad if we're fighting-" Ibuki intercepted.

"Shut up! This doesn't concern you!"

"No, she's right. I'll get going." You turned to leave with a small wave. "I promised to help Mahiru with something anyway."

When you left you quickly went to the bathroom to compose yourself. You were disappointed at yourself. You shouldn't have lost your temper with Hiyoko. Her insults were mostly empty anyway and she didn't know what she was talking about.

Still, you've always gotten mad pretty easily, when someone talked bad about the people you liked.

After splashing water on your face, you went to the garden of the school. After all, you really did promise to meet Mahiru.

When you arrived, Mahiru smiled at you and excitedly showed you the photos she already took. Mahiru wanted to take photos of flowers for the event and asked you to teach her about the meaning behind them. Since you was the Ultimate Poet and loved meaningful things in general and it was also a well-known fact, that you loved flowers.

Mahiru wanted to correctly portray the meaning in her pictures, so you taught her and gave her your own suggestions.

Before it was time for the festival to start some kind of teacher or security guard tapped you on your shoulder. You turned to him surprised and he had a sour look on his face.

...Did you do something?

"Are you Mioda or L/N?"

"Uh......" you thought about just saying no and leaving the country for a second, simply because he was probably one of the scariest people you've seen, but decided to not judge a book by its cover,

"Yes, I am. Is something wrong?"

"Why are your posters all over the Kamukura statue? Do you know how disrespectful this is?"

"Uhm..." you wanted to tell him, that you didn't put up the posters, but you also didn't just want to shift the blame to Nagito.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't aware. I'll remove them immediately."

"That won't be much use anyway... they've already made pictures of it at this point and will probably use it to damage Hope's Peak's reputation further. "

"They?" who would do something like that? Was he just being paranoid?

"The Reserve Course students of course. They've become increasingly bold over the last couple of weeks. "

Oh... you heard a rumor or two about the Reserve Course students getting more and more dissatisfied with their treatment.

"I'm... sorry again. I'll still take them off."

"Of course, you will. That's the least you can do."

You nodded and made your way to the Kamukura statue.

...which had several posters attached to it. Why did Nagito think this was appropriate, again?

While you didn't think, it was a huge deal - Kamukura was just the founder of Hope's Peak after all, not a god - you would have never came up with an idea like that yourself.

After taking off all the posters - which was quite exhausting, since some of them were really high up - you rested on a bench beside that statue.

...

You looked at the fountain and remembered that this was the place, where Chiaki and you first met Hajime.

You wondered where he is right now. Maybe he's also...

No! What were you thinking?

But with the recent events... Maybe it would have been better for someone like Hajime to never have attended this school. Whatever trouble he's in right now, maybe he could have avoided it.

...or maybe not.

When the festival was over you've all collected a decent amount of donations. You wondered what the school needed the money for. The reason the reserve course was even created was to gather money, too, after all. Maybe they were working on some kind of secret project nobody knew about?

After saying goodbye to some of the people, who visited the festival to make donations, you wanted to head home as well. You still needed to wait for Nagito though, since you wanted to go together. He promised to take you to his place for the first time, before that he always insisted on staying at your place. You waited at the school gate, watching various students going home already.

The last time you saw Nagito was before your and Ibuki's performance, where he wished you good luck. After that, he said he wouldn't be sitting in the front row again, but rather watch you from afar. Probably to not let his luck affect you again.

You wanted to protest, but he told you only five minutes before the show began, so you didn't have time to argue with him.

You had the feeling, he did that on purpose, but didn't say anything. You also knew that he didn't like loud and crowded places.

Your eyes lit up when you finally spotted him. He slowly made his way to you but didn't look into your eyes.

Did something happen?

When he finally arrived, he cleared his throat. "I can't believe, you actually waited for me. I'm sorry, it took so long."

"Of course, I'll wait for you Nagito. Let's go!"

"...So you're not mad at me?" He looked into your eyes now, but looked apprehensive.

"What do you mean? Why would I be mad at you?"

He sighed. "You got into a fight with Saionji because of me, and you got into trouble with the head of the security..."

"Oh. So you know?"

He looked at you dejectedly. "I'm sorry, Y/N. Even if you're not mad, I'm sorry."

He looked really upset about this. You wished he wouldn't have found out, since he always worried about being a burden to you, but you really didn't mind. He sighed. "Saionji was right, by the way. I'm nothing but an obstacle in your way. Even when I'm trying to help, I end up ruining things."

"That's not true-"

"Then why can everyone see it, except for you? Of course, I knew that people would talk bad about me, because I dare to be that close to you. But people talking bad about you because of me? Just when you were about to befriend Saionji, too..."

He was truly just standing in the Ultimate's way of creating hope. That has always been the last thing he wanted.

"Well, it's Hiyoko's fault for judging something, that has nothing to do with her. She's always like that. I don't need her approval. "

"But, if you're going to apologize, I'll accept the apology. As I said, it's okay. So... do you wanna head to your place now?"

"Ah, so you still want to do that?" He looked slightly surprised.

"Of course! I wanna see how you live."

"..."

"Is there something else, Nagito?"

Nagito didn't have the heart to tell you. You shouldn't be meeting each other.

He's only ruining you.

He's only taking advantage of the fact, that you haven't noticed yet.

"Nagito..." you took a step closer and placed your hand on his shoulder. He sighed and looked at you.

"I love you."

His breath hitched.

Sure, you said so the day before already, but he was still shocked. He thought, that maybe it was actually just an accident.

But you said it again. Despite everything.

And your eyes looked sad. Because of him. He was seriously such a failure...

Still, he couldn't bring himself to end your relationship. He longed for you. And he longed for you two to be close again. He longed for your warmth and you telling him, it'll be okay.

He was really nothing but a pest.

"Hey!" You grinned at him now, "Can we hold hands on our way to your place?" Your eyes were sparkling with hope, as you looked at him.

...How could he deny you? How could he deny giving you hope?

So he smiled back at you. Despite his doubts. And nodded.

You beamed at him and grabbed his hand.

When you arrived, he hesitantly showed you around. His house was really big but pretty empty. It was probably sad to live alone in such a big house.

"Wow, that's so pretty!" You excitedly pointed out of the big window to his garden.

"Really?" Nagito didn't really understand what you thought to be beautiful in that garden. It was just green.

There were no flowers. No decorations. The grass wasn't even trimmed. Leaves were scattered everywhere.

"Yeah! It's so big. And it looks untouched. We could do anything with it. Ah! How about we draw some kind of layout, about how we'd want it to look like? We don't even have to actually do it, just imagining is fun! I always did that, when I was a kid."

Nagito liked when you talked about your childhood. It sounded so different from his. You made so many experiences with different people. Good and bad ones, without luck affecting them.

He has always been alone. Even before his parents died. Or his dog died.

Nobody ever wanted to be around him, because bad things were always following him.

He still remembered the kids, he so desperately tried to befriend when he was younger. But they rejected him instantly or left him after some time. Sometimes even during some bad incident.

He still remembered their faces, when they looked at him disappointed or disgusted.

That's the exact reason, he was hesitant to show you his house. He always knew warmth was missing in his life, but after spending time with you and your family, he realized it even more.

You were probably already pitying him and seeing the reminder of his lonely, empty life, would probably just make things worse.

Kill the last bits of affection, you still had for him.

"While I envy your way of seeing the world, I completely disagree." He decided to be honest with you now. You'll probably hate him anyway at some point. "These things aren't pretty. You're just delusional."

You were surprised at his choice of words. He never... talked to you like that.

You shook your head. "There is no objective good or beauty, Nagito. The difference is just how you choose to look at the world."

His eyes changed a little, and he looked like he was drifting somewhere completely else, with his mind.

He looked at the ground and smiled bitterly. "That's simply not true, Y/N. You of all people should know that. Hope is the absolute good. I don't know if you're purposely lying to me, or if you really fail to see the beauty in hope. You as an Ultimate, not appreciating hope... That's truly dispairing..."

How could you constantly encourage someone like him, even at the cost of hope? He had to stop that, for the greater good.

"I don't care about Hope or Talent Nagito. Those are just concepts made up by humans-"

"What?" His eyes looked scary now and he clenched the hand he was looking at into a fist.

"That's so so sad Y/N. Do you even know what you're saying?"

He didn't even look stereotypically angry, he just looked deranged. He let out a fake-sounding sigh.

"Hope is the absolute good Y/N. Unworthy trash like me or any untalented people, are just born to be the dirt the strong ones walk on."

"Don't you see, that you're torturing yourself thinking like that, Nagito?"

"I... ha... hahaha." Although he sounded like he was laughing, his face looked like he was in pain, as tears started to fall from his eyes. He pressed his hands, which were curled into fists on his forehead. He clenched his fist so hard, he started bleeding at this point.

But that doesn't matter. He deserves it. He pressed even harder, the greater the pain got. Even though he hated it. He hated the pain. He didn't want to be hurt.

But that's how it had to be.

"Nagito!" You stepped closer and tried to pull his fists away from his face and unclench them.

He didn't resist.

It was the opposite, he choked back a sob as he sank to the ground.

Without thinking, you immediately kneeled in front of him and held his hands. They were scratched up and slightly bleeding.

You wanted to patch him up, or at least clean his wounds, but you didn't want to leave him alone in this state. You also doubted, he would follow you.

So you just pressed a kiss on the back of his hands and held them close to your heart.

He started crying even harder and pressed his face into your shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm sorry..."

How could you be so nice to him, even when he was so rude to you? How can you still be here?

"I'm not sad, because of what you said to me, Nagito... I'm sad, because of the things you say about yourself. I really care about you, you know? It breaks my heart to see you think so little of yourself..."

"I- I don't-" he hiccuped, "I don't- understand-"

"Why? Why? Why?" He cried against your shoulder.

"It's okay, Nagito, really." You brushed your hand up and down his back.

You would always comfort him. Always reassure him. No matter how long it will take.

He held you really tight when you were sleeping that night.

On the next day, Nagito was back to his usual self again. He smiled again and did his best to make your day better.

While you were happy, he 'looked' happier, you feared that he was just overplaying his real feelings again.

If he continues to do that, outbursts like the previous one would be inevitable.

Still, you didn't think it was a good idea to bring up the topic again.

He also tried to cook you pancakes in the morning, which was really cute.

He did end up destroying his oven though, which was the sound that woke you up in the morning. When you went downstairs, to see what was up, he just told you, you'd be going out for breakfast - while standing in a destroyed kitchen.

When you went out, he gave you one of his jackets, since you didn't bring one and it was surprisingly cold in the morning.

You went into a nice little bakery in the neighborhood. You chose it, since you went there often and Nagito didn't know the neighborhood too well, as he never ate out.

The nice, little woman greeted you when you stepped inside. "good morning my dears! What can I get for you kids?"

"Uhm... we would like to eat inside, please. And we'd like two hot chocolates and pancakes, please."

"Of, course! Just sit down there."

While you were waiting for your orders, Nagito looked around. "It's pretty small here..."

"Do you not like it?"

"No, I do." He smiled.

You grinned at him. After a short time, the old lady came back. "A hot chocolate for you... and a hot chocolate for the young gentleman!"

"Ah, thank you."

"It's no problem, really. And I'm actually really glad, you're coming with your boyfriend Y/N."

Nagito blushed. You just smiled at her. You often talked to the woman in the morning, when you came here to write poems on the weekends. You loved the warm atmosphere.

"So, then! I'll leave the lovebirds alone, your pancakes are ready soon, too!" She left you again.

"I'm really sorry again, that I can't even make breakfast for you. I trained baking for the last couple of days, but now that you're here... it must just be my luck."

"Haha well, I appreciate the effort then. But I like eating with you, no matter the circumstances."

"You're too nice to me..." he dismissed you, but it fortunately didn't sound degrading.

In all honesty, Nagito just wanted to make the day perfect for you. He already ruined the day before, with his attitude, and was more than grateful, that you haven't left already.

Even if he can't give you the same warmth, you had at your home, he wanted to offer you the best he could. Even if it wasn't much. For some unexplainable reason, you actually seemed to enjoy his presence a little, so he shouldn't make it worse, than it already is.

He also hoped, you wouldn't get sick of him too soon. Despite what he said yesterday. He was so scared of you leaving him.

When the food arrived, the both of you ate quietly. He looked troubled by something, so you decided to break the silence. "You're worried about something, huh?"

He looked surprised. "Ah, how'd you know?"

"I think it's safe to say, that I know you at least a little at this point." You smiled. "Do you want to tell me?"

He looked to the ground with a sigh but didn't answer. You wondered if it was about your conversation yesterday. Would it be okay, to bring the topic up already?

But the topic he brought up wasn't what you were expecting.

"Is it true, that you said you'll get the class expelled if they weren't nice to me?"

"Whaaaat? Hiyoko must have totally imagined that?"

"Hiyoko? I never said I was talking about Hiyoko."

"Oh."

Well damn. You always thought you were smarter than that, but... it wasn't really a secret anyway. It was more of a joke.

"It's not like you could actually do that anyway, right?" Nagito asked you.

"Pfff no. I'd have to have several people backing me up and stuff. And even then it'd take a couple of weeks..."

"Were you... also responsible for my suspension being lifted so fast?" he asked you curiously, with his head tilted. "Um... well yeah, but like I said; it wasn't just me. I had several other student council members backing me up."

"Members, that you probably convinced..."

"Well... does it matter how we got there? Anyways, it was just friendly talking! No bribing or threatening, don't worry!"

He sighed, looking to his right, "That wasn't the part, I was worried about..." honestly, he couldn't care less, about which methods you used. You could do whatever you deemed fit, in his opinion. "What is it then?"

"I am always worried, about you going out of your way for me... but using your position as a student council member? I definitely don't want you to take that risk."

So that was, what he was upset about? You didn't expect it to be something so... basic.

"I'm barely a student council member as it is." He looked at you slightly surprised, "I meant it. I was offered the position before I even joined Hope's Peak. I didn't want it and I don't have any passion for it."

Now he looked even more surprised, maybe even a little upset.

Great, you forgot about his irrational passion for Hope's Peak.

He shook his head, "Even if that's true... It would be better if you didn't consider me. I don't ever want you to go out of your way for me or risk anything, no matter how unimportant it is for you."

"Well, if it's that you're worried about, it's okay as well. Because I'm not doing this for you.", you put your hand on your chest and looked at him determinedly, "I'm doing it, because I like you, because I want you around me. That's why I convinced the student council members, because I'm selfish. So it has nothing to do with you."

He sighed, "You're probably just saying that to make me feel better. But whatever... It's not like I have the right to refuse an Ultimate anyway..."

You frowned. So he was still bringing up shit like this?

"Sorry. You hate it when I talk like that, right?"

You softly shook your head. "I don't want you to hide your feelings from me, even the bad ones. But yes, I am sad to hear you talk like that."

He didn't answer and just silently continued eating. This wasn't going how he wanted at all. He wanted to make you feel good that day. Despite what you said, he should have probably just kept his mouth shut.

"You know, sometimes you might feel like you're the unluckiest person in the world, but for all you know, you could just be in an unfortunate situation."

He frowned. "What is the difference?"

"Hmm..." you thought for a moment, about how to explain your thought process. "Let's say a fox ate a rabbit and after that he got sick. You don't know if it was caused by eating the rabbit or, because there was something in the rabbit's stomach."

"..."

"If foxes stopped eating rabbits out of fear of getting sick, they'd long be extinct. As long as foxes keep eating rabbits, and we keep living our lives, we'll experience all kinds of different situations."

Your analogy was cute. But still there was no way he could see it like that. His luck has always worked differently.

Still, it didn't really affect him too much when he was with you... for a moment he felt like he was normal.

And except for your passion for poetry, there wasn't anything that indicated, that you were an Ultimate, or from a different status than him.

Besides, after spending so much time with you, he discovered so many beautiful things about you besides your talent.

How your eyes would light up when seeing a stray kitten on the street. How you hummed a melody when you thought no one was listening. Or how you bit your lip, when you were angry, but still smiled.

Those things were probably barely noticeable to others. But he would love to spend his whole life observing you.

He wondered if he would fall in love with you again in a world without talents? Maybe you'd even be happier there.

Wait... what was he thinking?

No. He can't think like that.

...right?

---

On the next day, Nagito decided to do something safer, than trying to cook. He prepared a picnic for you. But instead of going to a park, he wanted to go to his garden with you. Sure, it was empty, but you liked it.

And maybe he could start liking it, too, with you there.

You were sitting with your backs leaned against a tree. Nagito was reading something in a book and you were writing in your notebook, which you got from Nagito.

"You're writing a poem, right?" He asked you. It was obvious why he would think that.

"Ah, not exactly... I'm writing a song actually."

"Oh, I see." He didn't think much of it. He knew, that you've written songs before.

But you looked unsure about something. You closed your notebook.

"Do you want to hear it?"

"Ah, it would be more than just an honor, if you would actually want to grace me with the sound of your voice." He instantly replied with a smile.

"Haha..." you nervously laughed, "but please be honest. I know you have a passion for talents and stuff, but I want to know if you actually want to hear it."

"Oh... I'm sorry if I didn't seem genuine-" but you interrupted him, "I wasn't criticizing the way you express yourself, I just wanted to make sure it's what you truly want."

He was taken back for a second. You were always considering his feelings, even in everyday situations. "....I see. I would truly want it. Even though... I don't think you should waste your time showing your beautiful talent to me alone."

"Well it's not like I'm the Ultimate Singer or something, I'm the Ultimate Poet. And even at that, I'm only as good as I am, because I keep wanting to improve myself. So, see it like that: you could help me that way. I would appreciate it if you would tell me your honest thoughts and criticism in the end."

Thinking like that... he supposed he could work with that. That way your talent would only shine in its most glory with more worthy people and he would be there to help smooth the rough edges... that sounded truly beautiful. Still, he doesn't think he'd be any help.

"I would love to help you in whatever way I can! Even though I don't think that my thoughts and opinions would be important to you..."

"That's not true. Even if you don't value your own opinion, I do. So, please tell me every thought you have. I promise I'll want to hear it."

"I-I see..."

When he heard you singing, he thought you sounded beautiful. And your lyrics sounded meaningful, but... sad. He doesn't think sadness suits someone like you. It would probably fit garbage like him, but not someone as hopeful as you.

The more you sang, the more touched he became and tears started to well up in his eyes at some point. But it was only fitting for the Ultimate Poet to move someone to tears with their words.

When you finished, he clapped with tears still in his eyes. You smiled embarrassed, as he gave you the most compliments, you've probably ever received in that short amount of time. But right after, he asked you a question you had already expected.

"What did you mean by 'you will never become, what you aspire to be'? You're an Ultimate. Were you trying to put yourself in someone else's shoes?"

"..."

You didn't know how to explain him. It's probably stupid, but you were scared of his reaction. "It's because I don't want to be a poet."

Nagito was shocked, to say the least. He never imagined an Ultimate to not want to do what their talent says.

But still, it surprisingly didn't change his opinion of you much. He nodded. "What is it you aspire to be then? A songwriter?"

You were surprised by his calm reaction but nodded. "You're not disappointed..?"

"Huh? Me? Disappointed? Why would I be?" he looked at you confused.

"It's just... sometimes... I'm scared I might not live up to your expectations of Ultimates... or Hope..." you admitted quietly.

Nagito froze.

Never... would he have expected someone to be worried, because of what he may think. Never.

"Y/N... I don't like you, because of your talent. I would like you the same, even with no talent." he declared and looked firmly into your eyes.

"...Really..?" You whispered.

"You're sur...prised?"

You were seriously surprised. Although you were hoping for him to comfort you, you didn't expect him to actually say he'd like you without talents. Talent seems to be what he's obsessed with the most.

Nagito on the other hand was sad, that you got this impression of him. Although it was understandable why, he never wanted to make you insecure because of him. Never.

Not because you were an Ultimate, but because he loved you. He was certain.

Whatever love is... he knew that he loved you. No matter what you'd choose.

Even if you'd fall into despair...

"I never... never thought- someone would actually be worried about what I might think. But you're right. I do admire talents and hope and that's why I admired you, but... with time, I've gotten to know you on a way different level than just admiration. I really... really care about you. More than I have ever cared about someone. And I'm so happy... every second I get to spend with you. Not, because you're an Ultimate, but because I... I love you."

You felt moved to tears, too now. But you didn't want to cry. Not in front of Nagito.

But it would be okay... right?

You quickly dried your tears and hugged him.

This was okay...

If you were just in each other's arms...

Everything was okay.

So why couldn't it have stayed like this forever?

A whole year.

You've been a couple for a whole year now.

And every day you felt like you had gotten a step closer to happiness now.

Even Miss Yukizome came back at some point.

You felt truly happy. Class 77B felt like your family now. At the beginning of the school year, you would have never imagined things to change so drastically.

There were also sad memories, of course.

But all of those were outshined by the good memories.

"I'm sorry I have to leave so late..." you yawned while leaning against Nagito.

"It's okay! You have responsibilities and I respect them." Nagito smiled at you. "Probably more than I do..." you chuckled and he nodded with a shrug.

The Student Council suddenly had a meeting. Even though school was already over for that day.

But you didn't mind that much. Although they could've asked nicer... you were suddenly sent a strange video with the message "All Student Council Members have to gather at 18:00 in the old school building of Hope's Peak Academy. That is if you don't want your loved ones or yourself to suffer."

Although you were weirded out by it at first, the quality of the video was pretty cheap. So, you suspected it to be another prank of Aiko Umesawa. She tended to be quite dramatic.

"Also when you're home your hot chocolate and bath will be ready~" he teased.

"Hehe."

He really did spoil you.

Ah! That reminded you... there was something you still wanted to give him. At first, you wanted to wait until after the meeting, but you wanted to see his reaction now.

Besides... if he would reject you, you could cry alone, instead of awkwardly having to stay.

It was a ring.

And no- you didn't want to propose to him.

At least not directly.

The ring was something, that was very dear to you. For your whole childhood, it was the only thing you still had, that belonged to your biological parents.

You didn't even know them. You didn't even know if they were good people. But they were your parents. And the ring was the only thing you had left from them.

Until you lost it. You haven't seen it in years and never thought you'd see it again. But by a lucky coincidence, Nagito found it under your couch at some point.

A spot you've already cleaned up several times over the past few years... and now it suddenly appeared? But you didn't want to complain.

Although you accepted years ago, that the ring was gone... you felt happy to have it again. Simply, because now it can have meaning again.

You knew it was naive and you were young. But you loved him. Really much. So you wanted to give it to him.

"There is a gift, I have for you..." you said as you shifted from his arms. He watched you curiously, as you searched for something in your bag. When you found it, you smiled and asked him to close his eyes.

He did. He trusted you unconditionally.

You placed something small and cold in his hands. "You can open your eyes again..."

When he did, he spotted the ring and was confused. Was it the ring from her parents, which he found a short time ago?

"I want you to have it. As a promise."

"A promise?"

"That one day, we're gonna marry each other."

His eyes widened at first, but then he smiled. "Y/N..."

"Thank you, I'll treasure it. More than anything I have ever possessed."

You smiled back at him.

"I'm glad. I love you, Nagito," you said, as you departed.

"I love you, too," he answered without hesitation.

He's gotten more confident during the time you've spent together.

You waved with a smile and made your way to the academy for the meeting.

Nagito waited for you to return, as he happily hummed a melody and prepared, so everything would be nice when you came back.

He waited for you to return...

But you never did.

#danganronpa #nagito x reader #nagito komaeda #komaeda x reader #danganronpa x reader

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crushed-starlight · 4 months

Text

ok !! yall need so many updates from me aaa i'll try to speedrun them n not give u too much junk to read hehe

the main thing is, today i took a huuuge train ride home from uni !! i was on the road for a super long time but i got tons of reading done :3 but for about a month , i won't be seein any of my uni lore people in person ;; it's gonna be weird for sure since i've spent so much time around them recently, but i think in some cases (ie meadow lol) the distance will be good to help me rly evaluate what i'm getting out of that closeness n whether it's worth it.

plus, i'll get to hang out with my friends from here more too !! theres TONS of interesting stuff goin on with them too, so i'm sure there'll b more of that !!

anyway, here's a mini recap of some stuff that's happened since my last entry !!

i had a big night out with a bunch of people !! my first stop was an indie music night with odie and jiji, then after that down to a queer club night where we met meadow and one of their friends !! we also ran into another classmate who we didn't know was even queer, n he ended up joining us for the night :D

i also ran into a bunch more people i know !! specifically winter and (new character time) wave, who i'll add to the masterlist sooon :3

overall it was super fun n they played a bunch of my favorite songs :3 i love gay people <3

remember how i said 'as per jiji's advice i'm gonna try n keep some distance from meadow'? yeah i for sure did not do that. we explored a retail park n saw a movie on one day, did field work in the city another, n kept walking to class together almost every day !! i am ,, so tired !!

honestly, the crush might be beginning to fade, or just shapeshift into a friendship. i'm becoming more n more aware of potential red flags or just reasons i might not personally want to date them.. mainly, we're just really different in terms of personality. compared to when i'm hanging out with jiji and odie, i just mask around meadow a lot more. i overthink a lot, they tease me over my silly cringe interests n traits (of which there are a lot lol) instead of hyping me up , and i know they don't mean anything of it but i'm tired of being constantly reminded of how Different i am from them ,, and by extension from most people.. ok but wait there was last night .......

we went to a candlelight concert !! to any pair of people other than us, it probably would've been super romantic. what a waste of a perfect night, right? but it was still nice. we dressed up extra pretty, the music was nice, we sat right at the back of a beautiful church and listened to basically a classical music concert. i drank mulled wine in the intermission, there were about 20 christmas trees all decorated and themed after different charities and local organisations. crush thoughts aside, it was a really magical experience for what it cost (15 pounds yippee) :3

but , of course , since i knew that if i got home after that i'd have the most miserable yearning-filled night, i helped set up a pizza party with my flatmates (and odie) instead !! so jiji, comet, and our fourth roommate chipi !! i'm surprised i haven't mentioned him yet, at some point he should get a loredump post of his own since there's a lot to unpack with him lol

anyway the pizza party went great , save for the worlds worst phonecall with the pizza place which i foolishly volunteered to have. that pizza place employee in particular encompasses all the reasons i get anxious about phone calls.. yikes!

ok i think that's everything interesting that's happened so far !! here's to hoping i can have a nice relaxing (but still productive !!) month off. well , aside from the 6 giant essays i need to research and write >< but it's fine, i'll cope :,) bye for now !!

#star.txt #crushes #digital diary #starlit meadow #starlit odie #starlit jiji #starlit winter #starlit wave #starlit comet #starlit chipi

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fraink5-writes · 8 months

Text

In the Names of Freedom - Chapter 17

Hey, everyone, this chapter is a bit early because, unfortunately, I won't be able to post tomorrow or next Sunday (sorry in advance!).

Thanks to @leio13 who dedicatedly edited this chapter through her incomprehensible screaming.

Summary: After confirming the death of his latest target, Xiao’s secret mission is interrupted by an eccentric stranger in green, who claims to be Xiao’s protector! But the reality is much more convoluted… What destiny could possibly link Xiao with Venti—an assassin of hitmen?

This chapter can also be found on Ao3 here. Without further ado, please enjoy!

Venti left the scene with great haste. To think he would run into the famed lead detective of the Adepti Agency, Morax, a second time… He hadn't changed at all since their last meeting. Venti could still remember that day at the hospital in Wolvendom twelve years ago as clear as day…

He had been beaten within an inch of his life, but somehow he had won. At least, he thought he did. But he had collapsed shortly after, and then, to his surprise, he woke up in a hospital bed a few days later. He was only a teen then. A teen with absolutely nothing. And yet many people had come to ask him questions—"What happened at Decarabian's Tower?" "Who killed Decarabian?" He had ignored them all.

Until an unusual man paid the room a visit. Although his posture and step carried an undeniable authority, when he spoke, his face and voice were surprisingly disarming. "Hello, it's nice to meet you. I am Morax."

The boy's plan was, of course, to ignore the stranger just as he had done with the rest. "..."

"What is your name?"

"..." A foolish question. Even if he played along and made one up, it would mean nothing.

"I'm sure you've met many people over the past few days trying to ask you about Decarabian's Lair, but I'm not interested in that. I want to talk about you for a bit."

Yeah right. Morax may have worn a dignified facade, but he was no different from the other detectives. Besides, there was nothing to be said about the boy anyway.

"See?" The nurse chimed in. "He refuses to say anything to anyone—not even the doctors who saved his ungrateful life! All he will say is 'Where's Venti?' We've looked, but there is no 'Venti.' He's useless. I'm sure you won't find what you're looking for with him."

Morax exhaled. "Would you mind letting the two of us talk alone?"

"Suit yourself." The nurse walked out of the room.

So Morax was one of the persistent types. What would it be? Yelling? Threatening? Grabbing? Hitting? It didn't matter.

"That was an inexcusable thing to say about a patient—especially in front of him."

He didn't care. They were probably right that he was useless, anyway.

"Well, since we're alone, I will get serious. What I want to speak with you about today is…"

Here it comes, the inevitable interrogation about Decarabian…

Morax reached into his pocket and pulled out a square photograph. "Do you know this boy?" The boy in the photo had black hair in two short pigtails and eyes as blue as an autumn day.

The hospitalized boy's breath got stuck in his throat, and his eyes went wide.

"Is this 'Venti?'" Morax asked.

"What happened to him?!"

"I was hoping you would tell me."

He wanted to pounce and scream "TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED!!" but his body crumpled in agony when he so much as sat up.

"Try to remain calm; you'll only end up hurting yourself otherwise," Moraxed coaxed him. "I'll tell you what I know after you tell me what you know about him."

The boy growled, but he relented. Morax was the only person who took his search for Venti seriously, and he needed whatever information he could get. "We… Me, him, and an unfamiliar boy… we were running away…"

"Running away?"

"Yeah… from Decarabian's Lair. Everyone was panicking and fighting all around the city, so we decided to use the chance to run away."

"Where were you running to?"

"I don't know. Neither of us had left before—we weren't allowed."

Morax jotted something down on his notepad. "Okay, so then what happened after you ran away?"

"The other boy… He was injured and delirious. But Venti was insistent that we bring him with us. So I stayed behind to buy them some time…"

"I understand. So you don't know what happened after that?"

"No… Tell me already—what happened?!"

"I'm very sorry to inform you that Venti is dead. By the time I found his body, he had already passed. He had been stabbed twice and fatally shot in the chest."

Dead? Venti was… dead? The giant beautiful world that Venti had sung songs about just a week ago suddenly collapsed. The song that was supposed to illuminate the blue sky and nurture the living creatures of the planet fell from the heavens. "Arghhhhhhh!" The boy's whole body screamed and writhed.

Morax watched silently. There was no consolation he could give. When a nurse knocked on the door, he sent them away.

A tear broke through the boy's eyelids and tumbled listlessly down his face. Then others followed in a silent funeral procession towards the bleak, white sheets. "So what happens now?" The question was just as much about himself as it was about Venti.

"The boy's body is being sent back to Decarabian's Lair where it will be buried in an unmarked grave alongside the other victims of the tragedy."

So that was it? Venti's body was going to be thrown into an unmarked ditch and forgotten like he never existed? "Why…? He had a name… He almost made it out too…!" It was too unfair.

"I'm sorry. It seems like Mondstadt's government wants to quickly put this incident behind them. The sudden, implosive collapse of one of their biggest cities—even if it was an overgrown drug den—can't be a good look for them."

He wanted to scream. The outside world was no different than Decarabian's City. Venti's dream had always been an impossible fantasy. He had died for nothing.

"But there still is some hope." Morax suddenly smiled. "You're still alive."

What did it matter? He was nobody. For Venti, he had wanted to be someone, but he had failed.

"If Venti is important to you, you must remember him; you're the only one who can." That was the last piece of advice Morax gave before irreversibly exiting the nameless boy's hospital room forever.

It was only many years later, when his own journey led him to Stone Gate, that he would learn that the other boy had also survived, that Morax had found him too, and that he now went by the name Xiao.

Venti was an entirely different person since he had last met Morax, and while he wished that was enough to prevent Morax from recognizing him, he knew better than to get his hopes up. If anything, he was grateful that the detective went along with his lies.

But he had no idea what Morax would reveal in private. Venti himself had no idea what he wanted Xiao to know, and the thought of Morax taking that choice from him petrified him. Of course, it was all unfair. Xiao had the right to know. Which is why during lunch he had nearly worked up the courage to tell him about the other case—about the other Venti. But after Xiao had told him no and especially after Morax appeared, Venti's resolve was crumbling. After all, what good would this information do Xiao? What could it do besides saddle on another painful memory? Venti wanted to save Xiao; he wanted him to be happy. And for that, perhaps it was better if he never remembered.

All these reminders of the past made Venti crave a drink. Xiao had been very stern with his directions before Venti had left, but Venti was an adult who could make his own decisions. Financially, Xiao still had the upper hand; he had left Venti with no money, but this was Stone Gate—with a little stealth, Venti was sure he could get his hands on something.

Before he knew it, Venti had arrived in the neighborhood of the hotel. It would actually be more convenient to find a supply near the hotel, so he quickly took a seat on the low roof of a nearby building. From here he could watch the entrance of the hotel (lest Xiao arrive unnoticed) and the surrounding areas. And strangely enough, someone caught his eye almost immediately; a familiar woman had exited the hotel. With straight, dark hair in a ponytail, she was wearing purple Liyue garb and round, golden spectacles—oh, Venti had seen her at the restaurant. She had her phone against her ear and a scowl on her lips.

"I could easily find the lyre on my own…"

…

"I just don't understand why we had to come all this way…"

…

"With the right budget, I could have resolved this search without having to leave Liyue Harbor!"

Having leapt from his perch, Venti tapped the woman's shoulder. "Excuse me."

"Uh, hold on," she muttered into the phone before turning to Venti. "Um, hi?"

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but are you looking for a lyre?"

"Something came up. I'll talk to you later. Bye" She hung up the phone with great eagerness before beaming at Venti. "Yes, I am! Do you know something?"

"Unfortunately not, but I'm also looking for a lyre myself!"

"Oh, really? Then, why don't we look together?"

"That would be wonderful!" Venti readily agreed. "I have no clues as to where my lyre might be, so you lead the way."

"O-oh, okay." The woman started walking south east.

"You know, since we're so close to Mondstadt," Venti began. "You could probably buy another one here in Stone Gate?"

"You're probably right, but the one I lost is important to me. I actually bought it on a recent trip to Mondstadt, so I'd really like to find it again."

"Oh, I completely understand! A musical instrument carries the heart and memories of its owner."

"Exactly. That's why I'm here again in Stone Gate to see if I can find it… What about you? Are you here to look for your lyre?"

"I wish. I'm not even sure it's in Stone Gate. It's an old model, so I'm terrified just thinking of what might be happening while I'm not there." Venti shuddered. "I'm actually here because my partner dragged me along."

"...Partner?"

"Yeah, he said, 'I'd love to go to Stone Gate since we both have so much history there', and now here we are on this impromptu getaway."

"Wow, sounds very romantic…"

"Oh, you wouldn't think that if you'd met him."

"Why not? What kind of person is he?"

"He's very scary. He's a man of few words, and he's so tough! Oh, but he's actually a sweetheart! You know, I'm just a little bard, but I know I can count on him to save me in a pinch!"

"O-oh…"

"You know, Stone Gate has something of a bad reputation, but I'm sure my partner could beat up any lame criminal this town throws at me! He's my hero!"

"Oh, w-wow…" The woman was staring with her eyes wide and jaw slightly agape.

"Ah! Sorry for saying such things! I'm just not used to traveling by my lonesome, so I'm a little worried…"

"I-it's okay. I understand! So, um… where is this partner of yours if not with you?"

"Oh, well… He ran into an unexpected family problem, so he'll be busy with that for a while… So don't worry! There's no chance of him interrupting our search! He doesn't even know I'm out!"

In that matter, Venti and the lady from the restaurant continued chatting (mainly about music) as they wandered south, casually searching for a lyre. As far as music went, Venti noted she was an amateur at best, but as an expert, he could not turn away the opportunity to teach her a lesson. When they reached the waterfront, the conservation came to a stop.

"Oh wow, we made it all the way to the port, didn't we?" Venti remarked.

"It looks like it. And we still haven't found the lyre…"

"What a shame…"

"Oh, but we might be able to learn something helpful here!"

"Really?"

"Some of my friends keep a boat here; perhaps they found some leads."

"Then let's go talk to them! I'd love to meet them!"

Venti let the brunette lead the way as he trailed slightly behind her. Meeting her friends would probably take a long time. Venti would have to apologize to Xiao when they met again. As they slowed, he reached into his back pocket and unlocked his phone. He had laid out every phone he had ever owned in the exact same way just for moments like this one. Without looking, he guided his fingers to his messages (luckily there was only one) and quickly sent off his coordinates to his only contact: Xiao. Then he shut his phone off and turned all his attention back to the ship they had stopped in front. It was a small vessel, but anyone in Liyue would know to fear its carmine sails. Venti's legs nearly failed. He knew he and Xiao were being followed, but he never thought their pursuant would be the most feared pirate group in Teyvat and Ningguang’s shadow—the Crux Fleet.

Two strong hands grabbed Venti's arms and twisted them. When Venti's knees buckled, the mysterious person put him in cuffs. "That was surprisingly easy," said a male voice from behind him. "Are you sure this is our guy?"

The restaurant lady nodded. "Sorry, my bard friend. Looks like we were both here in Stone Gate for other reasons."

#Genshin Impact #Xiaoven #Venti #Xiao #Zhongli

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tenelkadjowrites · 2 years

Note

Ah, thank you for your thoughtful answer to my slow-burn & smut message! I wrote it spontaneously early in the morning and didn't expect a long answer. <3

Due to my identity I find most sex scenes a bit, maybe not necessarily off-putting, but just not for me let's say, which leads me to ignoring certain words or paragraphs. My brain just skips them automatically lol. Sometimes when I'm particularly not in the mood I skip the entire scene. Even so, if the smut in general aligns with things I enjoy reading about it won't make me cringe or lose interest. And I found that your fics are fine for me, I never imagine myself as Y/N anyway, so it's okay, but like I said - certain kinks are simply a no-no for me.

Dirty talk can be very awkward and ridiculous and I'm honestly not a fan of it, so I appreciate how much work you put into your stories. You make the characters so varied in personality and preferences. I actually talked to you about Addicting Kitten, I remember saying I didn't think it would be for me, but two of my friends kept sending me snippets, so I eventually caved in and it's one of my fave Hwa fics I've ever read, even though Y/N was totally unlike me (I definitely enjoy reading about characters similar to me, I like when they're more relatable, but it's not a must, I just get irritated with certain characters), I found the whole relationship dynamic so great!

Writing smut isn't easy, and like you've mentioned - you can't just always write the same thing over and over again, it needs to fit the theme of the story and make sense character-wise. And when sex scenes feel unnatural and forced it's just not a vibe.

ah omg i do remember that ask and thinking it was cool you gave it a chance even though you originally thought it wouldn't be for you. it's funny because i try to write different readers (i also do not picture myself when i read or write reader fics) but the AK reader is probably the "closest" to me for various reasons which is why i've never recreated a reader exactly like her since. at the time, no one was reading my fics so i didn't think much of being that self indulgent when i wrote that reader...and now i'm too aware of how many ppl can read my fics and i get too shy to write anything that close to me again lol. (i know talking about shyness when i post very detailed smut online sounds silly but i am actually a pretty shy person which is why i barely post personal stuff on here.)

i am pretty picky when reading smut scenes to the point where even certain words or phrases can pull me out of the story so i completely understand where you are coming from when you talk about reading them. even when i post my own stuff, i don't expect everyone to read every single thing i write. like i might simply be writing something that someone doesn't vibe with and that's fine to skip it. like i said in my last answer, i write for myself and fics allow me to write a lot of stuff for different reasons, some as simple as escapism or more complicated reasons like self exploration, and if that resonates with even one single person reading the fic, that's great.

and yes, finding a way to write a smut scene that works with the dynamic and whatever version of a reader i've created is important to me. i want it to flow well and make sense regardless of if i am doing a ton of plot or very little plot. i try my best to tailor it to the dynamic while still keeping the fic light and fun. (fics are my "fun" stuff, my personal stuff i rarely show anyone skews a lot more serious or even into the horror genre.)

i appreciate such the thoughtful messages you send in. <3

#asks

0 notes

snailsrneat · 2 years

Note

Hello, thank you for the match-up event (i love your work 🥺🥺) It’s my first time requesting, so whoop, here we go-

I’m a 5’4 East Asian with straight black hair and dark brown eyes. I guess my most notable physical quality is either my eyes or lips (they’re unnaturally colored for some reason.) I dress in mature/expensive clothing that makes me look older than I am. That or anything I can find in the house. (Basically, business + Victorian fashion or hobo style.)

Uhh, I’m an introvert. I’m either a type 9, 6, or 2 personality. My way of thinking is very romantic, even if I do keep my thoughts on the down low. I adjust very quickly to situations, specifically, you say one word and I psycho-analyze you with surprising accuracy. I get burnt out easily, but I’ll die before I ask for help. I fluctuate between cocky idiot, weirdly kind human, and composed internal narcissist.

Basic Interests: I adore music and the arts in general. Also, philosophy! Yum.

Specific interests: I’m grade 6 pianist and do advanced jazz. I really love old/ancient traditions, cultures, languages.

Favorite food: Roasted duck or Caribbean salad.

Phrases you like to say:

“I don’t like this game anymore.”

“Well, it’s been nice talking with you guys, but I’m going to go cry now.”

“Delicious.”

Zodiac: Taurus

MBIT type: INFP

Phew, this was long XD

You have been matched up with...

Kalim Al-Asim

------------------------------

Your personalities compliment each other's very well.

Y'all are both alike and completely opposite at the same time.

One thing I think is cute is that you guys would secretly plan dates for each other, then when you both surprise each other at the same time.

You guys stare at each other for a second, before bursting out laughing like maniacs.

Jamil doesn't know how to feel though.

One minute your stopping Kalim from doing something stupid, the next you're helping him.

Jamil did approve of you guys at first, nowadays though he's a little bit iffy on it.

You'd probably be in Ignihyde so how you guys met is a bit of mystery to most.

In actuality though y'all just met in class and he wouldn't leave you alone.

The man falls in love quickly, so all it took was one look and he fell in love.

He'd follow you around like a puppy, constantly complimenting on your eyes and occasionally buying you stuff he thinks you'd like.

When he found out you play piano that's when he lost his mind.

You were in his mind constantly and he couldn't stop, so he finally decided to confess.

He couldn't contain his excitement when he heard you say yes.

He picked you up bridal style and began to kiss you all over your face.

He knows when your stressed and forces you to cuddle with him.

He will literally lay in chest and not allow you to leave until he deems you "Unburnt-out"

He listens to you whilst you play your favorite songs. It's his favorite thing.

He doesn't understand much about philosophy but buys you the best philosophy books and listens to philosophy lectures with you.

He tries to make Jamil your favorite food everyday (Jamil refuses to do it most of the time)

Kalim does learn how to make it though.

In general I'd say y'all are the wholesome chaotic couple.

----‐-------------------------

Small A/N here, uhm, recently I've had a minor influx of people asking for match-ups. Especially after I post these ones and I just want to clarify, no I am not doing match-ups. Also, in case any one has read my other match-ups you'll realize that I changed the style of them. I have my reasons for this, namely that creating a short story takes up a lot of time and to be completely honest I've been putting them off the match-ups for a long time because of that. So I am changing the style of them. Don't worry though, I won't change the older ones. Anyway, that's it, byyyyye!

#Match-up event #twst #twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #interactions are appreciated #twst matchup

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midnight-in-town · 2 years

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Don't care what the comics say, I still believe Zuko and May were together till the end. Bite me, but most the comics just not very good and just very lacking, and their break-up was just badly written.

Hey! Hmm, I thought it was kinda fandom acknowledgement that the comics are more ideas post ATLA than actual canon content? So personally, I always considered that Izumi's mother was definitely Mai (similar side eye game and chin)?

I mean, I do take the comics for granted when it comes to how every country necessarily would struggle with the notion of peace after the war ended, but I think short comics are not the right media to expand on such ideas. For example, Ursa's predicament: I get what they were trying to do but, because 3 albums of about 50 pages aren't enough to tackle the idea, that led to some serious shortcuts, namely about Azula's character development and most of the fandom wasn't fond of that i n d e e d.

Both Zuko and Azula suffered immensely because of Ozai, but when Zuko was banished, at least Iroh went with him and attempted to help him cope. Meanwhile Azula was left alone with Ozai and...

...she definitely deserved better than the whole "oh she's insane" approach (poor kid, this breaks my heart every time).

About Mai and Zuko more specifically, I absolutely adore their dynamic but honestly I can understand them breaking up and coming back together again several times.

I mean, Zuko just became Firelord of a nation that is guilty of being at war with the rest of the world for the last century, so obviously he's going to have his hands full with rebellions, possible civil war, as well as self-confidence issues. He and Mai breaking up because he seeks advice from his father who was the previous ruler and hides it from her makes as much sense as Mai's father fomenting a coup, since he used to be an important political figure under Ozai's reign.

Again, the comics bring up good ideas for geopolitics post war, I just disagree with the character developments they tried to address, because they're not being handled properly when the show put character developments at the heart of the main themes.

Anyway, my personal headcanon is that Mai and Zuko remained probably separated for some years: Zuko leading his country as best as he can into the new era of peace, while Mai helps him along with the Kyoshi Warriors on some specific cases. Then at some point, Zuko's advisors bring up the idea of a wedding (for many reasons) and want him to marry a faithful and important general's daughter....... and that's when he starts questioning again his feelings for Mai and their past relationship (which would obviously create a lot of drama since Mai's father tried to upstage Zuko twice).

Also, in my opinion, Zuko would have to be the one going after Mai. I know he has a lot on his plate with running the country, but Mai isn't interested in politics and she got her heart broken too many times to be the first one to take that step. In fact, every time Mai gets involved it's because people she loves are involved, so I believe Zuko would have to prove to her that he also knows how to make her a priority when it's needed. As a result, I'd say her political role as Firelady would grow on her overtime, but initially she would accept the position that comes with marrying Zuko for his sake, not for what it represents as power or for the country.

But all of this won't happen until Azula is back safe and sound within her own family, with her mother taking care of her after all the years of emotional (and who knows, maybe physical) abuse by her father. Azula's got good instincts though. She'd have made a bad Firelord because she only knows to make people obey with fear and she grew immensely paranoid after Ty Lee and Mai turned their back on her, but I think helping Zuko rule would make great use of her abounding abilities.

My take on it! :D Have a nice day Anon!

Hello! I believe this is in relation to this post by @ilya-boltagon?

Hmm, well, I think that if Iroh knew Ursa was Roku’s granddaughter then it’s safe to imagine that both Ozai and Azulon would have known as well. You make a good point Anon, but I honestly wouldn’t know because I have had the greatest trouble understanding Azulon’s character, which is why I loved that post that I recently reblogged.

As the son of Sozin and the father of both Iroh and Ozai who are polar opposites by the end of ATLA (because even if Ozai had lost Zuko, we all know he wouldn’t have developed a pacifist mentality like Iroh did after Lu Ten’s death), did he despise the Avatar figure? Probably. At the same time, the Royal Family let Roku’s family live after his death and then Azulon married one of his son to Roku’s granddaughter so, assuming he knew about Ursa’s lineage, it could have been a choice made equally for safety and honorable reasons.

Another possibility though is that only Iroh knew about Ursa’s lineage (as a member of the White Lotus), which would explain why Zuko learns about that fact when almost an adult and why Ozai never mentions it as an excuse to either shit on Zuko or to show pride in Azula.

I guess we will never know. Still I agree with @ilya-boltagon that it makes no sense for Azulon to kill one of his younger grandchildren randomly, just to teach Ozai a lesson. However Ozai would probably hate the idea of Iroh “stealing” his son more than the idea to end him by his own hand.

Have a nice day Anon!!

#avatar #mai #zuko #azula #iroh #ozai #azulon #ursa #roku #sozin #avatar meta #anon #answers #my analysis

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petersasteria · 3 years

Text

jealousy, jealousy || tom holland

sour masterlist || tom || sour taglist

906 words w: it's fucked up and it's inspired by some personal shit that i'm going thru, i mention some psycho shit italics are lyrics + important note at the end.

* * * *

Retweets.

Likes.

Reacts.

Shares.

Views.

Reblogs.

Followers.

Those are the main ingredients for relapsing in our insecurities. Those things make us drown in jealousy and anger. We claim that we’re happy for other people, but it’s hard to be happy for them if they get the things that YOU want. It feels unfair and it feels like being happy for them is rubbing salt in the wound.

We all have our winning moments, but sometimes we feel like our own winning moments aren’t enough to make us happy. So, when will we finally be happy? When we get a million followers? When we get a million likes, reblogs, and retweets? A billion views until it goes viral? Billions of shares until the app crashes? Truth is, we don’t know. We don’t know until we get there.

You knew that it was unhealthy for you to be jealous of some girl, but you were supposed to be in her place. The title of being Tom’s girlfriend is supposed to be and is rightfully yours. Somehow, everything became fucked up and Tom ended up with some other girl who clearly wasn’t you. You can’t help but feel as if the universe sabotaged you when in reality, Tom just met her and after a few dates, they’re now going steady. The universe had nothing to do with it.

Everyday, you keep refreshing her Instagram profile just to see if she posted a new picture or video or an Instagram story. You knew you shouldn’t do that, but you couldn’t help it. You wanted to be happy for Tom, but he was supposed to be happy with you.

She was perfect. She had perfect teeth, perfect sense of style, perfect hair, she’s basically Little Miss Perfect and it’s actually sickening to think about it constantly. Deep down you knew you were just as pretty and just as perfect because fuck society and their standards, but you can’t let your thoughts go. You were sick of being yourself because you were convinced that you weren’t fun or interesting. You wanted to be her and it became an obsession.

You would always compare yourself to her and you would think about her often. Whenever you pick out an outfit, you’d always ask yourself if it’s something she’d wear. If the answer is no, you’d put the outfit back and look for another one. It was so unhealthy and everyone was worried about you. Tom didn’t know that this was going on, but everyone else noticed how weird you were being whenever Tom and his girlfriend were around.

“She went to Brazil with her friends recently. Tell them, babe!” Tom excitedly nudged her before she told her amazing vacation story. You wanted to roll your eyes, but you didn’t want everyone to see that. She was talking about the vintage clothes she bought there and her phone was passed around for everyone to see her photos in Brazil. Admittedly, you thought you were crazy for thinking these things. You should be happy for her and Tom, but it was difficult.

They say we shouldn’t bring down someone during their winning season because we don’t know how much they lost in their losing season. As much as you believed in that, you can’t help but feel that her win is your loss. Even though it’s not true, you still thought that way. You were tearing yourself apart over someone who wanted to be your friend, but your jealousy was hindering you from doing so.

You wanted to be her so bad that you swore to yourself that if you were a psycho, you’d probably wear her skin just to be her for at least a day. The only thing stopping you from doing so is the fact that you’re not a psycho and you’re a good person. Technically, you were capable of skinning someone alive and wearing their skin, but you choose not to listen to the call of the void. It would wreck you if you did.

It’s karaoke night and everyone was there. To get this off your chest, you decided to sing ‘jealousy, jealousy’ by Olivia Rodrigo. When you sang the bridge, you meant every word. Only Harry seemed to catch on as he listened intently.

All your friends are so cool, you go out every night

In your daddy’s nice car, yeah you’re livin’ the life

Go a pretty face, a pretty boyfriend, too

I wanna be you so bad and I don’t even know you

All I see is what I should be

Happier, prettier, jealousy, jealousy

All I see is what I should be

I’m losin’ it, all I get’s jealousy, jealousy

When the song was over, everyone clapped and told you that you sounded really good. “Wow, I didn’t know you could sing like that, Y/N! You sound really good.” She smiled brightly at you. “I’m jealous. I wish I could sing like you.”

You wanted to tell her that you were jealous of her too because she got the man of your dreams, but you took the compliment because for once in your life, someone you’re jealous of is jealous of YOU. That’s so fucking rare and it doesn’t happen to everyone. For once in your life, you had the upper hand and it made you happy. Genuinely happy. In this round, you were finally better than her.

You stared at her and grinned, “Thanks.”

* * * *

i apologize to the writers in this site who im jealous of. there's so many of you, but i want you all to know that im sorry for feeling so jealous and insecure of my own shit that i let it get in the way of getting along with you. im sorry for cutting people off all bc i got consumed by jealousy and im sorry for being an asshole and i understand if the friends i used to have here won't want to talk to me anymore. it's all my fault and i'd be the cause of my own death, i swear. anyway, i wont tag any of you bc i want to avoid stirring shit up and also, none of you will see or read this. i hope you're all okay and i wish you guys everything good in this world. im sick of feeling this way. i need therapy.

to my friends @blueleatherbag @justasmisunderstoodasloki @hjoficrecs @allyz, i want to thank u for being super supportive and thank u for staying by my side when everything was rough. i love all three of you and im sorry if i dont say it enough.

𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @celestialholland @alinastarkrovs @piscesparker @prancerrparkerr @spideyspeaches @givebuckyhisplumsnow @blueleatherbag @theonly1outof-a-billion @hollandbroz-n-haz @starlight-starks @webmeupspiderdaddy @studiesinspanish @bi-lmg @minejungwoo @blossomhollands @markhyucksmells @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch @simonsbluee @itszulli

#tom holland #tom holland blurbs #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #sour album #petersasteria #k's works #tom holland angst

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blu-archer · 2 years

Text

Hi!!

So I haven't done an "about me" post before, so since more people are showing some interest I thought I'd post some short thing for you all.

Some things to know:

Ace spec.

00's born. The only reason I remember my age easily at this point.

I am in Uni, dominates my life honestly. But its fun so... I major in Fine art, so you might find alot of alternate universe characters are based around what I'm exposed to and know best!

I also have a lot of anxiety when it comes to talking to people, so if you message me I will probably either try to match your energy or come off accidentally abrupt - either way, please don't take it personally, I am just an awkward bean.🥲

that being said, you're welcome to send me messages if you want<3 [just you know... be prepared for awkward attempts of me trying to appear like a functional adult or potentially ghosting you until I can think of what to say.]

I use writing as a type of fun escape when I have time - if I don't post continuously it's probably because life is just a bit too overbearing at the time or I'm having a block

I also make a lot of typing errors because I can't pick up on them no matter how much I read over something - so I apologize but if you could just over look that, that would be great....🖤😅

In terms of writing:

most of this will be comfort and snz based

I also try and kept it as 'alternative universe' as possible because I find I'm more comfortable writing that

Probably won't do y/n fics purely because that makes me mildly uncomfortable. I understand these writings I do are all fictional anyway, but I physically can't do it. Sorry sorry!

Smut. If I feel like it, I will probably try and write it but it won't be often. It does sometimes make me uncomfortable and also I don't always know what the hell I'm talking about so...🤷‍♀️

Emetophobic. So I probably will avoid mentions of that unless its super vague.

Mess in general I think. Vague unless I really force myself.

If you want to send in any requests, feel free too!

I currently only write for BTS - but I stan a few groups. If I open to writing them, I will update this.

If you do send requests, just please don't expect it to always be out within a couple days - my Uni course is really an 'all consuming' type thing. But I would love to see what you guys might want to see!🖤

Dont be shy if you are interested in me potentially writing for you🖤💜

Also feel free to just speak to me or ask questions in the asks, I'm awkward but I like making potential friends! So if you want to know more about me or share your thoughts please do!

If I think of anything important I'll add to this, but otherwise have a great day/night!

Hopefully I will be posting more for you guys soon!

Stay safe!

#update #hi all!#edited

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that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick · 3 years

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Summary: Winry sat in the optimal place to study in the school cafe for the entire fall semester. Then spring came, and suddenly some self-entitled twit who dressed like off-brand Gerard Way decided it was his territory. He was so not going to get off easy.

Rating: T

Word Count: 1.8k words of coffee shop/college AU with a side of enemies to almost-lovers

A/N: It's finals week, I posted this on Ao3 at almost 5am, and if the rest of the sentence didn't make it obvious, I'm writing from unfortunate experience. Not beta-ed or proofread, although I happened to see one thing to fix when I woke up this morning. Feel my raw power. Rawr.

It wasn't that big a deal.

It kind of really was, though.

Every Thursday morning during the fall semester, Winry sat in the same spot at the same school coffee shop. It was the spot sent by the entire patron pantheon of cram papers. Maybe one person didn't need an entire booth, but it was in the corner, and the tops of the bench seats had opaque plastic barriers that just so happened to be perfect for minimizing excess visual chaos. For the most part, there weren't loud conversations, and the jazz music that came through the speakers helped her tune out people ordering coffee. Add to that the fact that she could use campus flex dollars and not her own bank account that was begging for mercy, and it was the perfect spot to get papers done.

But apparently not this spring.

As soon as Winry walked in, she noticed him in the corner. Some emo wannabe guy on his computer. Probably on Reddit complaining about how women didn't appreciate the amazing pics he sent them on Tinder. Or at least, it was a fair guess based on the sour look on his face. Why did this guy of all people have to steal the holy grail spot? Ugh. She was still gonna get her coffee, darn it.

"You know the deal, Sciezska. Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer."

"On it! You paying in flex?"

"Yeah." She scanned her student ID and lowered her voice. "Who's off-brand Gerard Way in the corner?"

"Who's Ger—"

"The punk kid."

"Ohhh. I can try to get his number for you, if you want."

"No, he looks like a total tool! And not the kind I like dealing with!"

"Which means you think he's hot. I didn't think you were into that type, but you're not wrong."

"For the last time, no, Sciezska! He took my spot! And I'm trying very, very hard to keep this to a stage whisper, but if you keep trying to set me up with some random creep, I won't be able to!"

A distinctly male voice grumbled, "I'm not a creep."

"Keep telling that to the girls on Tinder. I'm sure they'll understand eventually."

"Yeah, and I'll bet if you look at your 'Live, Laugh, Love' sign a little more, you'll understand it eventually." He mumbled something under his breath.

"What was that, Mr. Nice Guy?"

"Lay off, it's eight in the morning. I said the only reason I even have a Tinder account is because my roommate stole my phone while I was going to the bathroom."

"Well, if you didn't want it, why didn't you delete it?"

"Eh, I figured if I really got sick of being single one day, it'd already be there."

"Never would have guessed you were single," Winry said dryly.

"Come on, it's way too early to be rubbing that kind of crap in. Who says I'm not fine with being single anyway?"

Sciezska timidly spoke up. "Medium roast with espresso and vanilla creamer?"

Winry thanked her as red jacket boy continued. "'Edward Elric, Bachelor.' Almost sounds as good as 'Edward Elric, Bachelor of Science.'"

"B.S. degree. Sounds about right."

"About time you stopped acting like I'm an idiot!"

Winry snorted. "That's not what I meant."

"Hey!"

"And with that, I'm going to go find some other spot to write my paper."

Edward, as his name apparently was, scoffed and mumbled something that sounded like "good riddance". Maybe the librarians wouldn't get on her case too much for bringing in coffee.

-----

A week later, Winry walked into the cafe, assuming the circumstances of the previous week were an anomaly. They were not.

"Medium roast with a shot of espresso and vanilla creamer," she grumbled and sulked in the direction of the corner seat.

"Hey, don't start with me again, blondie. I've had a whopping four hours of sleep and I can't promise you'll like what comes out of my mouth."

"We're at a coffee shop. Get some coffee. I can't help it if you're too hung over to be polite."

"Now look, genius. I did not stay up until 4 A.M. working on a stupid chem paper for that sadistic pyromaniac excuse for a professor just for some random chick to accuse me of being hung over."

"Oh."

"Yeah. And for your information, coffee doesn't really help me wake up. It just helps me focus on homework." He lifted up his empty cup and gave it a shake.

"That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard."

"ADHD is a weird thing, and yet, here I am."

"Huh, interesting."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to pick up where I left off with the same stupid ten page paper I started last night."

"Oh right. Sure," Winry stammered. "Listen, I'm really sorry I just assumed things about you. It was wrong of me, and I'd like to make it up to you, if that's okay."

Edward eyed her suspiciously. "What do you have in mind?"

"Well...I could look over your paper once you're done writing it? I've got a paper of my own to write while I'm waiting, and I can sit right across the table here so you don't have to come get me. I won't try to talk to you or anything. Neither of us need that kind of distraction."

"Alright, alright. Get your coffee and sit down. The girl at the counter's been up there waiting for a good minute or two while you've been at confessional over here."

"Wait, she has?" Winry's eyes widened, and Edward laughed at her expense. He was kind of attractive when he wasn't scowling...wait what? She pouted and got up to retrieve her coffee. When Winry returned, she plopped down on the bench opposite Edward and opened her laptop. Peeking out from behind it, she added, "By the way, I'm Winry. I figured you ought to at least know the name of the person who's proofreading your paper."

"Well, Winry, you're the one who volunteered." The corners of his mouth twitched upward. The two worked on their assignments in silence, occasionally speaking up when necessary.

-----

Edward was in the corner again the next week as well.

"Hey, Edward! Mind if I join you for homework again?"

"Normally, I'd say no, but you didn't bother me too much last week, so you might as well." He turned away slightly.

"Great! Have you gotten your coffee yet? I didn't see a cup, and you got something the last two times."

"Eh, I haven't been here long. If you're going up and getting yours, would you mind ordering a caramel macchiato for me?" He asked, sliding his ID across the table.

"Yeah, no problem. I'll be back in a sec."

She returned and slipped his ID back before pulling out her computer. "Do you have anything for me to look over this time?"

"Not this week. But if you have anything you need looked over, I can do that, too."

"Actually, I do, if you wouldn't mind."

"Winry, I just volunteered. Just send the paper to my school email. Mine's 'elricedwa'," he instructed as he proceeded to spell it.

"Medium roast and a caramel macchiato?" Sciezska called out.

"Coming!" Winry replied and turned to Edward. "I just sent it, so you should be able to start while I'm getting our stuff." Eyes glued to his laptop, Edward gave a thumbs up.

Once she returned with their drinks, Winry sat down and wordlessly set Edward's drink next to him.

"Thanks," he muttered distantly. His lips mirrored the words he was reading. Though his lips weren't plump by any stretch of the imagination, they were shapely. His steely concentration made the air leave Winry's lungs. To top it all off, the first rays of sunlight came through the window just right, hitting Edward's hair in a way that made it positively glow.

What was she thinking? Those were only the sorts of things people thought when they had a crush. She'd only had two positive interactions with him, including this one. ...well, maybe it was a crush. She could certainly do worse than someone with a questionable fashion sense. After all, he worked hard, and he got good grades, if the quality of his writing was any indication. Okay, fine. He was also drop dead gorgeous, if you could see past his clothing choices. Yeah, she had a crush.

"Did you hear anything I just said?"

"...no."

"Figures. I finished reading your paper. It's not bad, I just left a few suggestions for sentence structure. Now I am going to enjoy my caramel macchiato." He took off the lid and breathed in the steam with his eyes closed, nearly drooping into the cup in content. When he opened his eyes slowly, Winry was awestruck by the similarity between the color of his eyes and his drink.

"What?" Edward furrowed his eyebrows.

"Nothing. I didn't say anything. At all. Nope."

"Okay." He shrugged. She reopened the document and went through his suggested edits. Gnawing her lip in concentration, she leaned forward a bit to settle in and tackle the editing.

"...hey, uh, Winry?" Edward gulped. "Are you going to drink your coffee?"

"Oh! Yeah, I almost forgot. Thanks, Edward!" she smiled.

"No–no problem. And you can call me Ed, you know. Most people do. Except for that excuse for a professor that calls me pipsqueak. Can you believe he's my advisor? I mean, come on, I'm a grown man. I'm not that short."

Winry made a poor attempt at containing her laughter. "Okay then, Ed. Prove it. Stand up."

"Fine." He slid out of the booth and stood. Winry followed suit and appraised their respective heights.

"Well, I'd hardly call you tall, but you're at least taller than me by a few inches, for whatever that's worth."

Edward grinned as if he had won some sort of prize. "Time for shorties to sit down now!"

"Watch it now. You're not too far from that label yourself, mister."

They both returned to their positions in the booth and worked steadily for the next hour. At the end of that time, Winry closed her laptop. "Ed, are you okay? You seem distracted."

"ADHD. I'm always distracted," he dismissed.

"No, like, are you sick or something? You did get more than four hours of sleep this time, right?"

"No comment." Ed's mouth twitched. He mumbled barely loud enough to hear, "Wouldn't have mattered anyway."

"Are you sure? If you're not feeling well, I can drive you over to the health center."

"N-no. That's not it." He exhaled, then slid a napkin across the table. His hands trembled slightly. "Anyway, here's my number. In case you need me to look over a paper. Or whatever. I've got a class soon."

Winry blushed, but tucked the napkin in her laptop. "Thanks, Ed. See you next week?"

"Yeah. Next week."

-----

Winry: This goes with your major, right?

Edward: Blocked

#fma #fma fanfic #503 day #when i wrote it it was probably still 503 day somewhere #edwin #edward elric #winry rockbell #fma sciezska #fma sheska #my writing #my fic #coffee shop au #college au

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firemblem-fics · 4 years

Text

Running With the Wolves [1]

preview | >>

-> Yuri Leclarc x Fem!Reader

-> Modern!Au | Gang!Au | Enemies to Lovers

-> Word Count: ~3.3k

-> Warnings: Violence, Blood, Cursing, Weapons

-> Summary: You were just a normal college student, trying to find her way in a new place. You didn’t mean to get caught up in the wrong crowd. You just wanted coffee, but now you’re running with the wolves.

-> A/N: SURPRISE I POSTED IT EARLY ! thanks to my lovely beta readers for helping me revise and edit this chapter to make it better! i’m still in a writing mental block but i think this is one step closer to getting out of it! so, please enjoy (again)! also, all characters are aged up (21+)! also y’all should reblog this so it gets out more 🥺

send me an ask if you’d like to be on the taglist!

"Fuck- She's losing too much blood, Boss, she's not gonna make it!"

"No, no. She's going to make it- I'll make sure of it. Stay alive!"

Your vision was dark and blurry- you couldn't quite see anything. You could only make out a few silhouettes hovering above you, each one rushing around and yelling frantically. You couldn't count how many were there. Your vision kept doubling and it was hard to discern one person from three. Focusing just caused things to get worse.

"Someone put pressure on the damn wound! She certainly won't make it if you all keep messing around."

It was only now that you noticed a sharp pain radiating from your chest, right below your ribs. You gasped loudly and coughed. It hurt worse than the throbbing that already coursed through your head. Your body burned.

Trying to look down, you saw a rag soaked in blood. Hands with bright nails pressed down on your wound to slow the flow, but it didn't seem to be helping. You started feeling dizzy and laid back again, clenching your eyes tight as nausea engulfed you.

"No, keep your eyes open, Y/N, dammit! Wake up!"

Slowly, the pain began fading, as did your view of the people above you and their voices. You could still barely hear the voice crying, sobbing out your name. Whoever they were, they were crushed.

"Wake up!"

Was that voice finally fading away too?

"Wake up!"

No- it was getting louder.

"Wake up!"

"Ellie, what the fuck do you want?" You groaned, rolling over on your bed.

Your roommate bounced on her knees, making your bed creak loudly. "What do you mean? It's like 10am, your class is at 11. Don’t talk to me with that tone of voice."

"Fuck me."

"Absolutely not, baby." Ellie smacked a pillow beside you and got up. "Get ready!" She went to her own room, leaving you to your own devices.

When you applied for an apartment roommate, Ellie was certainly not the one you were expecting. You would've preferred a chill, laid-back, person. Instead, Eleonora Yumizuru walked into your life (and apartment) and practically made herself at home. She didn't judge you from transferring so far away from your old home for your last year of college, claiming that "home roots don't mean shit when it comes to making it in the real world".

She had the right to say such a thing, having moved to Fodlan from another country in her youth. She was able to understand the occasional homesickness and help you cope as you adjusted to Fodlan life. She understood you like the back of her hand from the moment you met and you did the same for her.

Really, you had to let her move in. She’d probably have stayed even if you rejected her.

She was the complete opposite of what you were looking for- overconfident, stubborn, loud- but she grew on you and easily became your best friend. There was just something about the bubbly, blue-eyed, blonde-bobbed bitch that hooked you.

She had certainly hooked other people as well, but thank God her bedroom is on the other side of the apartment. Her social skills and magnetic personality worked for platonic friends and acquaintances as well. Ellie was constantly bringing over friends, allowing you to expand your own circle. She was heaven-sent for a newbie like you.

You sat up from your bed, yawning and stretching. Trudging to your bathroom, you rolled your eyes as the infamous Taylor Swift blared through Ellie's speakers, "Shake it Off" shaking the entire apartment. Nothing against T. Swift, but sometimes she was not the first thing you want to hear when you wake up. At least not at max volume. Ignoring the song switching to "You Belong With Me" -another banger from Swift herself, but really "Teardrops on My Guitar” was your favorite- you finished getting ready and lazed into Ellie's room.

"I've got class 'till late today." You sat on her bed. "Do you want me to pick up dinner? It’ll let me explore the area."

"Oh, please do. You need to get out more. But where?"

You shrugged. "There's really only like two good food places here. Golden Pizza and Blue Lion Buffet. Your choice."

Ellie thought for a moment. "I went to the buffet with my little friend Touma the other day... so pizza! I just can't choose a side in their little spat."

"Spat?" You tilted your head.

"Goodness, Y/N! I know you're a little new here, but you haven't even heard of the shit that goes on between those restaurant owners?"

Shaking your head, you stayed silent for her to continue.

"The owners of Blue Lion Buffet, Eagle's Freezery, and Golden Pizza are all huge rivals. I heard they were all close, but went their separate ways. All the owners' kids are our age, too. They go to Fodlan Uni, but I don't know who they are." She smiled. "I am an esteemed woman with an upcoming high status. Who would I be to take sides? I prefer to cater to them all."

You could only nod, hiding a smirk at Ellie’s infatuation of fame. A huge restaurant rivalry. How funny. "What about that little cafe on the corner? What's it called? Café des Loups?"

"They're pretty neutral, just some college dropouts trying to make some money. I think they’re gonna get involved eventually- every restaurant’s been dragged into their drama at least once."

You nodded, standing up and messing with your apartment keys. "I'll keep that in mind. Bye, Ellie!"

"Bye! I better see some pizza later!" She called as you made your way out of the apartment, now playing "I Knew You Were Trouble".

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

College was honestly a scam.

You sat in the classes for two hours at a time, for what? You were paying thousands of dollars to be talked at by old dusty men who made you fall asleep faster than trying to read their overpriced textbooks. You paid thousands to nap at a desk.

Unfortunately for you, though, your thousand dollar desk nap was interrupted by a tapping on the surface. You huffed and looked up, coming face to face with a pair of soft, orange eyes. They radiated kindness and just looking into them seemed to lift your mood immediately.

"Hey, you need to wake up for this part. The professor said there's gonna be a quiz on this section tomorrow."

You shot up, looking back at your professor. Blushing embarrassedly, you smiled at the boy. "Thank you..."

"Ferdinand." He drew his bottom lip in between his teeth, as if to conceal his smile, before giving up and returning yours just as brightly.

As you faced forward to Professor Hanneman, as you were pretty sure his name was- or was it Ham Man? You didn’t care enough to know- you were now struggling with two distractions. One, the weight of your eyelids as they threatened to pull you back into dreamland. Two, Ferdinand.

You kept glancing at him, taking in his complexion. He must have come to class late, since you didn't see him before. Or maybe he was on time- you did fall asleep quite early into the lecture.

You were eyeing his carefully sculpted jawline, dotted with subtle stubble that connected to sideburns and led up to clean, silky, orange hair. You wished to run your fingers through it-

"Y/N, this is the second time I've seen you not paying attention." You jumped nearly three feet in the air. "Next time, I'll have to ask you to leave my class since you are obviously taking it as a joke."

"I-I'm not joking! Sorry!" You stuttered, finally finding a reason to keep your attention on the lecture. You did look away once, just to glare at Ferdinand, who only winked and chuckled at your misfortune.

Class was eventually over and you sighed, finally loosening up from forcing yourself to pay attention. You packed your notebook and laptop and swung your backpack on, getting ready to leave the room before a voice called to you.

You turned back. "Ferdinand?"

"I was simply wondering where your next class was. I can walk you to it, if you'd like." Said boy walked quickly towards you, holding himself with a nearly-perfect posture. You felt anxious- he was trying to make himself seem like a gentleman, but you still felt a little unnerved.

"Oh, um, sure! It's not for another fifteen minutes, but it is across campus."

Ferdinand's grin seemed to get larger, making his eyes crinkle at the edges. "How wonderful! That little café is down there and I've been meaning to check it out anyways. It works out perfectly."

"Uh, yeah." You laughed nervously. This was the first time a boy had taken interest in you- or was he really interested? Maybe he's just being nice-

"Also, before I forget. May I get your number? I'd like to talk to such a gorgeous woman like you a little more."

Oh, he was so interested. You had to make yourself breathe again as you handed him your phone to let him put his number in. He gave it back to you and you noticed a heart and a smiley face emoticon next to his contact name. Your heart fluttered at the sight of the emojis and you felt your cheeks heat up a bit. Ferdinand gave you a sweet smile before holding the door open for you, letting you lead the way to your next class.

On the way to the building, Ferdinand spent the time asking you questions and getting to know you better. He had scratched basically the entire surface of you, save for the secrets that new people shouldn't know, and the same could be said for you. Ferdinand was definitely a polished and refined man. He made quite the impression on you.

"What are you doing after classes?" You asked, hoping to invite him for pizza at your apartment.

"Ah, I've got work!" He smiled sheepishly. He definitely caught onto your hopes...

"Really? Where? Maybe after, you could stop by for some Golden Pizza-"

"Actually, I work at the Eagles Freezery." He was tense, suddenly. "So I really shouldn't. Rivalry and all of that, you know?"

You were a little confused, actually. "Why would that prevent you from hanging out for a bit? You didn't buy it, I did. Plus I thought the rivalry was only between the buffet and the pizza place?”

"It's- it's a loyalty thing. It’s between all three of us.”

"It's a restaurant. How loyal could you possibly be to a dumb little ice cream parlor-"

"It's more than that!" Ferdinand snapped his mouth closed, suddenly making himself quiet after his angry outburst. "Listen, I cannot and will not eat there, look at it, talk about it, or do literally anything about it. Please, just understand that."

"Uh, yeah." You nervously readjusted your backpack on your shoulder. "I- I should get to class now. I'll see you later, Ferdinand."

"Goodbye, I'll message you after work!" With that, he sent you a wink and a smile and turned, going about his own day with the most carefree pep in his step. As if nothing ever happened. You, on the other hand, could not have been more confused. Ferdinand seemed unpredictable when it came to his moods. He was comforting and kind, yet was so… upset when you insulted the parlor. It was a restaurant. Why did he get so worked up about it? Maybe Ellie was right about it being such a big deal.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

“I just ordered! Go, go, I’m starving!”

Not even five minutes after you got out of your last class, Ellie was calling to remind you about dinner. You were still slightly unnerved from your encounter with Ferdinand, but you agreed to pick it up and would never hear the end of it if you didn’t do something as simple as takeout.

Golden Pizza was only about two blocks away and you stayed on the phone with your roommate the entire time, only saying goodbye as you walked in the establishment. The restaurant was very nice, the honey yellow walls and the glow of the wood-fired oven making the ambience warm and welcoming. You didn’t wait long in the line, soon coming up to meet a boy about your age with a glimmering emerald gaze and a smile just as bright at the front counter.

“Hi!” The boy- Claude, according to his nametag- greeted, “How can I help you?”

“I’m just picking up an order for Eleonora Yumizuru.”

Claude nodded and typed a few things into a computer at the counter. “I know Ellie! She and I had Stats together before she dropped out to pursue her acting career. She’s certainly something.”

“Oh, definitely. I’m her roommate.” Speaking of the devil, your phone vibrated in your pocket. It was a message from her. “She actually just messaged me. Wants me to bring her a dumb little lemonade from that cafe.”

Claude laughed, “You can go and get it now, if you’d like. Your pizza will be a few more minutes. Ellie set the time for your pickup for later, so you’re actually ten minutes early.”

You thanked him and left, walking to the cafe. You took your time, observing the shops around you. Across the street from Golden Pizza stood the Blue Lion Buffet. You smiled to yourself- what a cliche to have rivals across from each other. Beside the pizza parlor was another food shop, the Eagles Freezery. You thought about Ferdinand- he said he was working today. Maybe you could drop by and- No. No, Y/N. Go get your lemonade and go.

A soft bell chimed as you opened the door. You saw four people in cafe uniforms, going about their day as you approached the register.

“Welcome to our humble abode!”

“Constance, that’s only used for a home.”

You shyly waved at the so-called Constance and the pink-haired girl who corrected her. Cafe des Loups- or Cafe of Wolves- was a quaint place, quiet and not crowded, kind of like an off-brand Starbucks. Dim lights adorned the high black ceiling, illuminating the shop just enough for a comforting ambience. There was a mural of a rainforest painted on the wall to the opposite of the counter with comfortable tables and lounging areas. If you could, you’d probably waste the day away lounging around. It was the perfect environment for an introvert like you.

At this shop, a large dark-haired man controlled the register instead of Claude. As you approached the register, you noticed that he wasn’t wearing a nametag, but you had a small urge to call him Bigfoot.

“Hey! What can I get ‘cha?”

You scoured the menu. “Just two pink lemonades is fine-”

“Oh! Good choice!” Constance interrupted you, coming to stand beside the man. “Yuri-bird over there makes the best sweet lemonades!”

You followed her gaze over to a man who was sitting on a stool, slouched down and leaning his head on his hand. He stretched and stood up. “Thank God, we haven’t had many customers all day. I was starting to think we lost our appeal.”

“Of course we have not!” Constance replied. She turned to you, but you couldn’t tell whether she was still talking to Yuri or you. Maybe it was neither. “Not when someone as handsome as Yuri is making the drinks and my attractive self is greeting the customers!”

“Hey! I’m just as much of a visual as the boss-man.” The taller man joined in after taking your money. “We’re all pretty nice looking. Especially this little lady ordering~”

You blushed a bit. “Oh, please, I’m nothing special-”

“Nothing special?” Constance laid her hand against her chest. “You’re wonderful! Almost on the same level as me. Isn’t that right, Yuri-birdie?”

Yuri looked up from making your drinks, his analytical eyes seemingly boring holes into you. You shuddered, feeling like he could tell your deepest and darkest secrets from just looking at you. He shrugged, going back to the lemonades.

“She’s alright, I suppose.”

“You suppose? Yuri, that’s rude-”

Hapi was midway through lecturing the purple-haired man when the door to the shop chimed open and a rather large group came in. Yuri looked up and suddenly stood alert, as did the other three workers. In the group, you saw a familiar head of orange hair and orange eyes met yours. Your face screwed up into confusion.

“Ferdinand?”

“Don’t say anything.” The leader of the group, a short, white-haired girl snarled. “Are you a new… worker here?”

“Wh- you just told me not to say anything.”

Slowly, Yuri and the other three came up beside you, standing slightly in front. Your heart nearly stopped- you were in the middle of something you definitely weren’t supposed to be in and your sass had gotten on their bad side already. The white-haired girl scrutinized the five of you, her lavender eyes piercing holes through whatever facade of confidence you had tried to put up. You could feel yourself literally wither under her gaze, even more than you did when Yuri looked at you.

“What do you want, Edelgard?” Yuri put his hands on his hip, one fiddling with something under his shirt.

“I want your loyalty.”

Yuri snorted. “You aren’t in charge.”

“I’m not? Hm. Tell that to my father after he stepped down. I’m the leader now- the emperor, if you will.” Edelgard sighed heavily. “I have no time for more conversation if you won’t comply. Hubert, deal with them.”

The terrifying man who you assumed was Hubert suddenly reached in his coat and pulled out a handgun, aiming it at the five of you. Yuri quickly retaliated and pulled one of his own, throwing it at Constance before grabbing your wrist and running to the back. A loud gunshot rang through the air as you and Yuri continued to run. You both dodged around coffee shop equipment and he dragged you through a labyrinth that they considered the back of the store.

As you were running, Yuri pulled you to a sharp right turn and your arm scraped against a metal machine in your way. You hissed in pain and looked down at it, seeing a large wound going down your shoulder to your elbow. It was starting to bleed rather quickly, but you had no time to worry about it. You’d have time to tend to it if you survived.

“What’s happening?”

“No time to explain. Quick, hide!”

Yuri pushed you against the wall in between two larger cabinets and stood in front, grabbing yet another gun from his other hip. He cocked it, listening for the ruckus of the fight in the main room to make its way towards your location. You were shaking like a leaf, grabbing tightly onto your wounded arm and smearing blood all over your fingers and your clothes. You breathed heavily, trying to calm yourself at least a little- was this why Ferdinand had been so defensive over the Eagles Freezery? What kind of restaurant rivalry would constitute attempted murder? And wasn’t this cafe uninvolved anyways? You didn't have time to ponder any more questions as a loud crash echoed through the room. Yuri lifted his gun and began to speak lowly, not taking his eyes off of the door.

“When I say run, go out the back door and get in the black car back there. Don’t go home- one of them will find you.”

A gunshot rang through the air and Constance, Balthus, and Hapi burst through the doors, running towards you all. Yuri turned to you as the three of them caught up to him, pulling out their own weapons again as Edelgard began yelling.

“Run!”

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taglist: @fairyblue-alchemist @emperor-pizza @flavoredmilktea @fe3h-random-writing-and-stuff @mifuyuyu @blviddyd @laurexlance @atomicchocolatecookie @mapesandoval @local-goth-lilz

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shra-vasti · 4 years

Text

If I had to choose | Boo Seungkwan

Type : best friends au

Genre : fluff, slice of life, soft Seungkwan and strong reader? Like mentally strong and the reader always protects him? You get the point.

Word count : 2k

Synopsis : Seungkwan had always needed someone to look after him, he was too naive for the world but you were always there to protect him from all the odds, you were the bold one in this friendship.

A/N : This is solely inspired by a movie I watched and I really loved the interaction between the two best friend.

The music was played blissfully at the church by the band, all of the people who came to attened the wedding were either sulking at how boring the wedding was or were either pretending to be interested.

Even if we take a look at the bride and groom who were seated in their respected seat; the bride was taking selfies and the groom was chatting with some random person.

Isn't wedding suppose to be the most happiest and lively event?

You heard someone yell your name making you halt your activity and turn towards the voice, the father of the bride made his way towards you who was busy managing other activities of the wedding.

"Yes Sir?"

You didn't even made an effort to smile fakely at the man standing in front of you.

"You're not doing you're job properly, look how boring the wedding seems to be."

He exclaimed pointing at the people and the atmosphere of the wedding which made you scoff and roll your eyes at the said man.

"Listen Sir-" you breathed in, "- I have done my part as a wedding planner for this wedding, I have decorated the church with flowers and also the outside plus the song list you gave to me for the wedding I'm even playing it, now, it's not my fault that you have such boring family and relative who can't hype up the mood of the wedding, you can't expect me to do that!"

You were really tired, now what do they want you to do? Dance your heart out and entertain people so that they won't be bored? Being a wedding planner was surely a hard job. You even needed to bear the people's reckless tantrums.

"Hangin, the plates for the lunch have out numbered the guests in the wedding and we need more plates."

The brother of the man came rushing towards you and the bride's father.

"See-"

But before he could utter a single word you stopped him by showing your hand in front of him since your phone started to vibrate.

You looked at the caller ID to see Seungkwan written over it with a picture of a really adorable boy. You shook your head and decided to answer your best friend's call afterward and kept it inside your pocket.

"I told you guys that the plates will be out numbered, in a wedding with guest list of 1200 people you just asked me bring 700 plates saying it's not necessary that everyone will come and now see what has happened, you're such a miser."

You finally snapped at the man.

"Now how are we going to manage this?" Hangin asked you finally giving in and accepting it's his fault.

You nodded thinking of a way to get out of this trouble.

"I have an idea, I'll bring out 400 plates more but I need 200 dollars more."

"What? That's too much!"

"I didn't tell you to mess up in the first place plus since I know your condition I'm willing to take just 200 dollars otherwise other planners would have took nearly 500 for the urgent delivery."

You reasoned as you waited for their answer.

Both the brothers sighed.

"Okay I'll give you the required money just get you're thing done."

"Okay let's go." you agreed smiling at yourself for gaining an extra amout of money.

"Listen Vernon I need 400 plates more for the Jung's wedding urgently so bring it in 1 hour or less."

You informed your manager/friend calling him to tell about the emergency.

"Okay baby."

He chuckled before hanging up, he liked watching you being this stress but alas he wasn't there to witness it.

As you were observing if there were any other mistakes, a lady in her mid 30's, probably the aunt of groom, stopped you from going any further.

You looked at the lady with an eyebrow raised, you weren't normally this grumpy but there are different kinds of people in this world and they need to be treated just the way they treat others.

"I don't like this white rose system, it feels like you have came to a funeral hall."

She exclaimed while making a face at the decorations.

You huffed.

"Well I'm sorry ma'am but it was the bride's wish for the flowers to be white."

"Can't you change this flowers to green colored flowers?" The lady asked. "I like green more."

"I'm sorry ma'am but the wedding is almost finished I don't think I can do that plus it's hard to find such a big amount of green colored flowers."

"I don't know who gave you the permission to be the wedding planner of this wedding. Who even gave you the degree of being one huh? I will do a better job than you in this field." The lady said while blowing her manicured nails.

"Listen woman, you don't know how much knowledge and patience is required to be at this stage and you're better than me? Hell not even in your dreams who likes green flowers you dumb."

You scoffed and walked away.

Your phone rang again making you take it out in front of you Seungkwan was written on the caller ID, sighing you picked up the call.

As soon as you picked up the call you could clearly hear your best friend crying at the other end.

"Now what?"

You had already grown tired of your best friend's crying, not that you were heartless but the reason made sense.

"World is so cruel to me, this time it was my fault, I shouldn't have done that."

Seungkwan's voice cracked as he spoke with you.

"Yeah yeah the world is really cruel and the life can be hard sometimes." you said but that only made him cry more.

"Where are you Boo?"

You asked him softly taking in consideration that he's crying right now and he can't be treated harshly.

Seungkwan gave you the address where he is and without even a second glance you headed out of the church to fetch your bestie.

After fetching him up and constantly listening to him babbling about random things but not exactly telling you what happened, along with that crying face, both of you finally reached at your apartment.

He rushed out first and went inside the kitchen got himself a big piece of cake and sat at the corner of the kitchen silently eating and looking at nothing in particular.

You removed your blazer and shoes and stood in front of Justice.

"Mind telling me what has happened?" you asked putting both of your hands on your hips and here we go the Nigra falls started to flow again.

"Will you even tell me what has happened?"

You were so done with his constant crying that you had to control your urge to smack his head.

"Jaeyung."

"Now what? I know you're crying because of her but I want the reason, from the past 2 years all you do is cry over her and nothing else."

"It wasn't her fault, it was mine this time." he cried as he was still eating the cake.

"Eat first and then talk you brat." you made a face at him.

"Shut up. I'm already hurt."

You sighed and sat in front of him, crossed leg.

"Why don't you break up with her already?"

"I love her." Justice

"But I don't think she loves you."

"Why do you think like that? She loves me."

You pinched your eyebrows with your hands and started counting three to control your anger and also the throbbing headache which you know was soon going to follow.

"See you remember that time?"

"Which time?"

He casually asked you still eating the cake not really remembering what time.

"The time when she yelled at you for posting a picture of you with Bora."

"She was jealous okay, girlfriends tend to be jealous."

"And then he posted a picture of her with two random boys we don't even know about."

"She's different."

He furrowed his eyebrows pouting at you.

"Every freaking boy on the earth thinks that his woman is special but since it's coming from you're mouth, I know we are fucked up."

"But-"

"But what? Remember when both of us went to club with her and she introduce us to a new boy?"

"What about that?"

"Shw introduced you as her close friend and not as her boyfriend, did you get that? AS A CLOSE FRIEND, don't you know what happens when girlfriends starts introducing their boyfriends as close friends to someone?"

"But she said that she didn't want him to know about us because he was her cousin."

You rolled your eyes as you took out your phone, open up your instagram account and showed it to him.

"See where do you find a picture of both of you on her account. She has herpictures with so many boys but not with her own boyfriend."

You snapped showing him Jaeyung's profile.

"Okay I got it, it was her fault that time but this time it was me."

You motioned him to go on.

"She was in bathroom and suddenly her phone vibrated so I went to take a look at it and before I could do anything she snatched it away form me and was angry cause she thought that I'm doubting her." he says softly sniffling a bit.

"Do you know that she has a tinder account?"

"Nope." he answered.

"Boo she has a tinder account! Why does she even need it anyway? And why didn't she tell you? Do you know what it means?" you dramatically questioned.

"But what's the big deal anyway."

"Boo-" you stood up. "-out of two years means 24 months which means hundred and four weeks, she made you cry for hundred and two weeks, what kind of relationship averages one week of happiness per year?"

Seungkwan just looked at you and blinked multiple times digesting fully on what you just said.

"Then what should I do?"

"Finish it boy!"

"But I've been with her for 2 years already."

"It's never too late Boo plus that girl, I don't think she even loves you, you can forget her." you patted the latter's shoulder.

"I can't, I love her."

"Well I'm sorry then this is the only way I can save you up from that asshole."

You put both of your hand on your waist looking intently at him.

He gulped as you stood up looking at your eyes with confusion and fear written all over his face. What will you do?

"Me or her?"

The words left your mouth and horror plastered all over his face. He sighed knowing all well that whatever happens in his life he will always choose you and you'll always choose him.

"What club are we going to this time?"

You grinned at him already knowing you will win if you put out the said question in front of him.

"Surprise." and he groaned knowing he's going to have a wild night.

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thetpot · 3 years

Note

I just read you 10 stories post and I never knew you wrote Once upon a play and inconveniences. For some reason I realy love Once Upon a Play since it is such a fun story! So I had a question, since I think that I can safely assume you won't finish any of your old work. How were all you old stories supposed to end? So inconvenieces, on the sands of time (which is also a good story but just never got that far), etc. And maybe even what happened with Aang and Zuko later in Once Upon a play, since being gay illegal was in the fire nation.

oh my god, i’m screaming that someone who read my old work found me. biting my fist and screaaaming.

first of all, i’m glad you enjoyed them :) all those stories have big (huge, gargantuan, unavoidable!!!) issues but writing them brought me joy too. once upon a play especially was such a shitshow lmaoo, i was hammering out like 4000 word chapters a day and then doing the whole shitty “comment for an update thing” in the a/n. ew lol, anway :)

yes, it’s safe to assume i’ll never finish them. maybe i’ll adapt the concept for once upon a play and revamp it with more of an understanding of how ember island players was imperialist propaganda rather than just a cutesy fun play. something like: what might it mean for certain earth kingdom political figures, who perhaps were doing better under the fire nation (currying the fire nation’s favour by weakening the earth kingdom’s infrastructure), to leverage something outrageous like a play claiming the scion of the fire nation and the last airbender are in an illicit affair, and use it to weaken specifically zuko’s position back home and threaten to destabilize the peace. something along those lines.

i also quite like on the sands of time, but i’m iffy now on divorcing the characters from the world of atla and dropping them in some ahistoric middle eastern setting. i’d have to think long and hard on what kind of cultural and religious influences i want to include and what i want to ignore. it’s unlikely but if i was to work on any of them again, i’d pick those two.

as for how they were going to finish (or at least what was planned next, because i did not used to entirely outline all my fics, i think that might be obvious on re-reading once upon a play especially lmaooo), some elements i wanted to explore in inconveniences was that toph and iroh had an existing friendship that aang and zuko didn't know about, big party at sokka and katara's house, shenanigans with jet at that party, zuko and jet finally ending their fling at some point. aang's central arc within that story was basically this (taken from an old zipped file in the depths of my google drive, i didn't even remember i had this anymore lol): aang is tired of the sheltered life has been forced to live under gyatso’s wing. dissatisfied with his life, he is convinced that the answer lies in the conventional teen life – in parties, girls and alcohol. almost everything he does throughout the course of the story is in an attempt to live life to the fullest, to find the key to making himself feel whole for the first time in his life. however, as the story progresses, aang realizes that the void in his life does not need alcohol or drugs or parties or girls to fill it. he realizes that the only thing lacking in his life may have been maturity on his part.

which is yaknow… some characterization? not sure how i feel about it now, but at least, it's something lol.

as for zuko, he comes to realize the full extent of his disillusionment from life and considers that aang may be the key to fixing it once and for all. as the story progresses, zuko tries to find with jet the connection he feels with aang but is disappointed when he realizes that jet is nothing like the person he imagined him to be.

even though jet initially appears to only be a conventional villain, he is later fleshed out as we see that zuko is his safe zone, the only person with whom he relaxes. this connection, however, is negated by the fact that jet constantly does things to sabotage his relationship with zuko.

the thing about jet is interesting because it's more nuance than i gave him within the story in the first 8 chapters. i'm not convinced how well i would have been able to execute those layers of his characterization but yaknow, i guess it's nice to know i wasn't just trying to demonize him? i can promise you that i had no intention 11 years ago of extending even an ounce of that same nuance to the female characters, sadly.

anyway, the story was intended to wind down with aang being really reckless with his freedom, gyatso returning and aang needing to reckon with the fact that his actions have consequences (probably something to do with accidentally outing zuko since he treated his relationship with jet with a lot of disregard in the story, as far as i remember), and aang needing to repair his relationship with gyatso once he returns.

i'm iffy on the characterization of aang, looking back, but i won't say much on it coz it's a characterization, i guess? just not the one i'd go for if i was writing aang today.

as for on the sands of time, the next phase of the story would have been zuko realizing that azula is hot on their heels and separating from the group, realizing he cannot best azula on his own and so deciding to play double-agent with azula and string her along long enough to allow aang a chance of survival. azula and zuko would then chase them to the edge of the desert and gyatso dies before he can tell aang he is the avatar. to escape azula (and zuko), aang ends up bending both water and air.

as per gyatso's instructions, aang, katara and sokka venture deeper into the desert and along the way run into suki and the kyoshi warriors (who guard the boundary deeper into the desert), jet and his pals (who guard a part of the desert with huge geoglyphs of animals in exchange for the spirits granting them reduced dependence on water and food) and also zuko as the blue spirit. as they progress through the desert, they are aided by two mysterious figures who seem to be aiding them (surprise, it’s zuko and azula because the ozai actually does want aang to end up at the spirit gathering, he just wants to engineer that arrival to exploit that spirit energy for... something?).

end of the story, zuko and azula finally catch up, big fight between azula, zuko, the gaang, the freedom fighters and the spirits, and zuko almost dies. aang goes into the avatar state for the first time. and apparently, according to my bizzare notes, that's the end of volume 1 (?!!!). i literally forgot until this very moment that it was supposed to be a multi-volume story (lmao what). basically volume 1 was supposed to build this attraction between zuko and aang which comes to a head at the end of volume 1, when aang's distress at seeing zuko hurt activates the avatar state, and zuko nearly gets aang killed by revealing his hand to azula.

and then there's volume 2 (?! i still can't get over 12 year old me's ambition lmao). after the gaang and zuko flee from azula, both he and aang acknowledge their feelings for one another but iroh back in the white lotus is well aware that zuko is endangering the avatar because of his feelings and assigns someone else to protect the gaang. zuko leaves without telling aang, but instead of recalling zuko back to the city where iroh is, he makes zuko stay in the same city where aang is. aang tracks him down and they run into each other constantly while aang masters earthbending, and tension builds between zuko and aang as they resist their feelings for one another. the major conflict of this volume is when iroh tries to assign someone else as aang's firebending teacher. shenanigans ensue, tension galore. meanwhile, azula moves in to attack the city and once again, zuko and the gaang run (definitely sensing some repetition here lmao).

and then i never outlined volume 3 because i was a moron - an adorably ambitious one, but alas, one lacking the discipline to write what i think was supposed to be a 150k+ saga (?!).

as for what comes after once upon a play, i can promise you i barely thought about what was going to happen next in that story, much less what would happen after it.

anywho, i hope that answers your question :). it was nice to pull out my decade old notebook and realize i still had all these notes squirreled away somewhere lol.

#asks #thanks for the ask anon #looking back now it's very galling to see how i depicted specifically katara and the misogyny and racism inherent in that depiction #not to mention the rampant homophobia in my actual depictions of zuko and aang #not gonna tag this with any ships just to be on the safe side #as joyful as the experience of writing them was #i still feel a distinct dread in revisiting those fics and especially mentioning them on this tumblr #just because of how huge my blind spots were in my own biases #it just reminds me that if i didn't see those blind spots back then #i could still be missing huge things today #it's a hell of a thing

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smileyoongle · 5 years

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Come Back Home (A Kim Taehyung Mafia AU) // Part 4

I'm back to give you an update on your favourite angsty fic with an angsty chapter. This chapter is probably not that interesting but it is interesting. Just saying, it's gonna be a rollercoaster from now. So let's get it?!

Summary: You were dead. Or at least that's what Kim Taehyung thought. But love never dies. A myth, yes. And maybe that's why when he finds out that you are alive, he may have already lost you.

Pairing: Mafia!Taehyung×Reader

Your head rested on the window of Yoona's car, the urge to just close your eyes and fall asleep growing more and more unbearable. But you couldn't. Or at least you didn't want to.

That man's face kept flashing in your mind and you couldn't forget the adoration and longing with which he looked at you. Moreover, the warmth that had spread in your chest was very suspicious to you. It became obvious that you knew him and you definitely had a deep relationship with him.

You glanced at Yoona, wondering if you should ask her everything. But she didn't seem very fond of that ethereal man. She seemed to hate him.

"Who was he?" You blurted out, frowning as the words left your mouth before you could even contemplate them. Yoona glanced at you with a frown before turning her eyes back to the road.

"Who do you mean?" She asked.

You shivered a little, pushing yourself further into the leather seat for any kind of warmth. But you were wrong. It was cooler than you expected. With a hiss, you turned the AC vent away from you and settled back comfortably.

"The man you were talking to. Who was he? What's his name? Does he know me?" You bombarded her with your questions. But it wasn't your fault that your stupid brain seemed to be having problems with its memory file.

Yoona tensed in her seat, gulping as she cleared her throat and tried to focus on driving. She didn't expect you to ask her many questions yet. Especially not about him. She was pretty mad at you for even going to him but it wasn't your fault. You were a saint who saw the good in everyone.

Clearly, Castillo hadn't done a very good job at trying to make you forget who you are.

Yoona gritted her teeth and mentally slapped herself for even thinking that. No. She absolutely hated everything that you had to go through. And Taehyung was the only one to be blamed. Unfortunately, she knew you loved Taehyung a lot. That's right.

Loved.

"His name is Kim Taehyung. A mafia leader. He sells drugs, owns a number of clubs around the country and kills people who meddle in his affairs. He simply saved you." Yoona stated, feeling satisfied with her words. It's not like she was lying to you anyway. One way or another, you were gonna find out everything. So why not now?

Your eyes widened and you immediately felt scared.

Mafia leader?

Kills people?

"And no, he doesn't know you."

Yoona's words left you a little bruised. You didn't know why but you felt bad. Bad that he didn't know you.

No, Y/N. Get yourself together. He's bad news.

You told yourself, taking in a deep breath to keep yourself calm and composed. If anything, you should have been feeling grateful that you were away from him. He was dangerous and it was a miracle that you had been saved. Your face pulled into a scowl as you remembered the small letter you had given him. You were so embarrassed. He must be laughing at you.

With a sigh, you crossed your arms and closed your eyes, willing yourself to sleep until you reached your destination.

💔🖤💔🖤

The whiskey burned Taehyung's throat but he poured himself another glass. If he was going to get you back, then he had to learn to live without you. And that could only happen if he was drunk and lost in his dreams. The piece of paper lay in front of him on the black table, the words constantly making Taehyung's heart jump with joy.

"And what would Y/N say if she saw you getting wasted like this?" A voice said from behind him. Taehyung rolled his eyes and turned around, glaring at Hoseok who was also glaring at him. With a small smirk, Taehyung brought the filled glass to his lips and downed the liquid in one go, his eyes never moving away from Hoseok's face. It was clearly a challenge.

"She won't say anything cause she isn't here." Taehyung shrugged, placing the glass on the table with a little too much force.

Everyone was aware of how you hated it when Taehyung consumed alcohol. He was an addict before you had come into his life. You had truly saved him from becoming a monster and everyone was grateful to you for that. But now, Hoseok couldn't help but worry. You weren't here anymore and Taehyung was definitely gonna lose his mind if you didn't come back.

Hoseok sighed and shook his head, taking a step forward to place his hand on Taehyung's shoulder.

"Tae, you cannot do this. You know she'll be back soon. She remembers you. Why else would she give you that?" Hoseok nudged his chin towards the paper on the table. Taehyung glanced at it over his shoulder before turning back to Hoseok.

"I'm not doing what you think I'm doing. It's just a one time thing. I know she'll be back. Don't worry about me." Taehyung stated with a frown and removed Hoseok's hand from his shoulder.

Without a word, he grabbed the bottle of liquor and the letter before heading towards his study. Hoseok could only hope that Taehyung wasn't going to spiral down. Afterall, a broken heart can only get you so far.

💔🖤💔🖤

You cautiously stepped inside the decent sized house, your eyes wandering around it's interiors in curiosity. You had been here before but things had definitely changed a lot.

Yoona placed your bag on the floor before closing the door behind her. She smiled and placed a hand on your shoulder.

"Welcome home!" She sang, making you smile. The warmth of the house was nice. It made you feel good. You glanced at the staircase on hearing the sound of footsteps, your eyes narrowing as you guessed who it could be.

You knew him since you knew Yoona. You got along with him pretty well from what you remembered. But you weren't so sure anymore.

"And here he is!" Yoona exclaimed as soon as her brother's face came into view. You gave him a small smile while he grinned at you.

"Finally! I was waiting for so long." He said and pulled you into a hug. You chuckled and hugged him back, relishing in his soft hold.

"Minho. It's good to see you again!" You replied, pulling away after patting his back gently. Looking closely, you could tell he had become much more handsome since you last saw him. His brown hair was slightly tousled, which somehow didn't make him look bad. His green eyes sparkled as his pink lips pulled into a big smile. This was the person who you once adored.

"Let's get you settled in. And then you can spend time with your boyfriend."

You immediately turned your face to look at Yoona.

Boyfriend?

"What?" You asked, amused at the whole situation. In return, Yoona winced and rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. She didn't know if she should do this to you but you needed to be saved. Yoona only wanted you to be happy. And she could ensure that only if you stayed with her.

"Sorry. I should've said this in a better way. But yeah. Minho and you have been dating for years now."

Suddenly, a piercing pain shot through your head. You screamed and fell to the floor, clutching your hair as tears formed in your eyes. You gasped as your lungs felt like they were being constricted. All the noise faded into a buzz and white dots danced across your vision. You placed your hands on the floor to steady yourself. You could feel someone's hands around you but the pain in your head intensified. Your body felt like it was on fire and you couldn't fight it anymore. With another gasp, you closed your eyes and your body went limp.

Taglist: @min-t-posts @annoyinglyunabashedangel @bringitseijoh @kpopgirlbtssvt @unppleased @shadowstark @bangtanniexxx @wendyiiwl @imlostindarkness @bvbsins @jazzytfw @lovestrucked-again @hopetookmysoul @angelwolfexorcist @taes-strawberry @ireallylikefoodandyoutube @annoyingpessimist @hajimaoppaa @atwoodscott @kawaiimusiccollection @byeolizzie @sleepysavya @somewhereinthestarss

So you can see I'm having trouble tagging some people 😭

Tumblr is always so salty. Anyway, tell me if you wanna be tagged? And also, sorry for the short chapter. I'll give you a longer one next time! Bye!!

-XX

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themjinterviews-blog · 5 years

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48. Put your hands in the air and say hell yeah. Captain Jack! Johnny Depp!

What motivates you to do what you do? Sheer necessity, usually.

What was the weather like the last time you went out? Hot. It’s Arizona so it’s probably near 100 + sunny.

Do you go for walks often? I’m pretty lazy and try to avoid it. You sorta gotta trick me into walking, like take me to a big shopping mall or something so I inadvertently walk around it whilst shopping.

What color shirt are you wearing? Gray.

What is your favorite type of youtube video to watch? I don’t really watch any. I just use it to occasionally look up songs or to record snippets of stuff to remix songs.

Do you need any new clothes right now? I got plenty.

What’s the next project you are excited to start? I’m working on a nonsensical Adult Coloring Book featuring animals committing crimes.

Do you collect anything? If so, what? Used to collect rocks and Pokémon cards. I suppose in a sense I collect all sorts of art/office supplies.

^and if not, what would you like to collect? Nothing really.

What was the last disappointing thing that happened to you? I don’t know. Suppose work being closed for renovation for 2 weeks kinda sucks because I sort of need cash.

What is something God has healed you of? I don’t really do the whole God/Religion rigamarole... Chances are if we are healed of something, there is a psychological, sociological biological or generally rational explanation.

Have you ever experienced a miracle? Like, a phenomenal coincidence? I think as much as I hate to be a downer, there's probably a lot to do with our perceptions of events

What was the last thing you ate? Lucky Charms.

Do you ever eat food that’s intended for kids? Well, Lucky Charms. I also love pizza rolls and chicken nuggets. But I’m not eating Gerber Peas&Carrot baby foods or anything crazy like that.

What was the last stupid thing you did? Define “stupid”? Most things I do are probably stupid to others but perfectly acceptable to me.

Do you get embarrassed easily? Sometimes.

Are you wearing pants or shorts right now? I never wear shorts.

What are your top three names you like for a daughter? Elliot (this is also my pick for a boy name), Tara, Hazel.

Would you ever film a vlog of yourself giving birth? Ew. Fuck no. Honestly, adopting/fostering sounds way more my style anyway. To be totally frank, pregnancy sounds gross and being unable to take my adderall sounds awful. I’d gain like, a million pounds.

Do you like getting caught in the rain? It’s usually a refreshing break from the heat out here.

Do you think your hair looks best straight, wavy, or curly? Messy, or in a side-pony.

What was the last craft project you completed?: Coloring books for my friends’ kid.

Name 3 youtubers you would like to meet in person: I don’t know any.

Has anyone ever spread an untrue rumor about you? Sociopath ex. Not sure he actually said them aloud to people other than myself, but I was constantly being accused of weird stuff I absolutely did not do.

What’s one rumor you’ve heard about yourself, and is it true? N/A. No idea. Not aware of any relevant or applicable rumors. I literally just keep to myself and do crafts.

What color are your nails painted currently? Not painted.

Do you use a pill box? Jesus, I’m not 80.

List 3 people you know who were loving and then turned cold: it’s kind of generic to assume either of those things as permanent traits. But probably most flings or whatever. It always feels cold when one party loses interest.

Have you filmed a youtube video today? Never filmed one in my life.

Do you leave the house when you’re on your period? Um yes. Life doesn’t stop just because I have cramps.

^If not, why not? -

Have you ever felt threatened for your life? Yeah. Sociopath ex would get overtly paranoid and mistake harmless or unrelated things I did or said to be conspiracies against him. And occasionally my imaginary betrayals would lead to violent words or actions. Like, a bundle of index cards with Carrabba’s menu items and their ingredients, word for word, from the Carrabba’s menu, was somehow coded plots to who the fuck knows to have him killed. Irrational stuff like that.

What are you behind on? Student loans. And when I say behind, I really mean that I actively chose not to pay them.

Do you get enough sleep each night? No because night is my time to be productive, uninterrupted and without bothering anyone. I hate having to stop my thoughts just because other people are making noise or trying to converse with me.

Which did you like better: high school or college? Absolutely college.

Which year of your life stands out to you as the most significant so far? Probably last year or two.

…and why? Big personal transitions and revelations in my life philosophy.

What was the last store you shopped at? Walmart, most likely.

Do you have a favorite pharmacist? I used to back in NY. Her name was Evie. She wished a customer Happy Thanksgiving on Valentine’s Day accidentally once and it cracked me up and we had a running joke about it.

Do you have a favorite cashier at the grocery store? I don’t shop frequently enough and I switch up stores when I do.

What was the last thing you ordered at Starbucks? Probably a toffee nut Frappuccino.

What’s something you discovered recently?

What makes you more creative? Emotional turbulence, certain drugs.

What’s the last magical thing you experienced? Um…Magical? The herd of unicorns crossing the I-10.

What is the theme of your bedroom? None. We are staying in a spare room at a friend’s. But we're actually moving this week because being micromanaged and constantly scrutinized was getting old.

Have you ever lived in a dorm? Yes, for a few years

Who is someone whom you admire, and why? I guess the lady at work, Amanda. She’s like 64 and works open-close every day, and still has a great attitude.

When was the last time you stepped outside of your comfort zone? I don’t know. I test the waters every once in awhile.

Where would you like to travel to next? Nowhere crazy. Just back to New York for the Renaissance Faire.

If you could win three dream vacations to anywhere, where would you go? Portugal—New Zealand—Ireland.

Would you rather ride a camel or an elephant? Camel. They’re fuzzy.

Are you a free spirit? I don’t know what that even constitutes. I think outside the box and I question social conformity and other preset patterns of thought. But I don’t know that has much to do with my spirit.

Do you want to lose weight? I think I’m okay for now.

Which insects scare you, if any? They don’t scare me, they just creep me out …spiders, centipedes, millipedes, roaches…ugh.

Do you think it’s silly to be afraid of a tiny insect? It’s not like I think they’re going to murk me with a sawed off shot gun. I know they’re harmless and therefor not technically scary…but they’re still creepy and unsettling somehow.

Have you ever experienced paranoia? To some degree.

Have you ever hallucinated? Indeed.

Were you raised religious? We were raised Roman Catholic. Didn’t stick.

Have you ever been abused? Psychologically, emotionally, physically and sexually. #sociopathic ex.

Do you think the cops should do more about bullying? I think cops have enough shit to worry about as is and don’t know how effective extensive police interference would even be. I think the anti-bullying message is stronger when conveyed by people closer to kids like teachers, parents, siblings or a celebrity figure they idolize.

Is there a coffee shop you like better than Starbucks? I like them all about the same.

If you could afford to get your hair professionally done, what would you get? Probably dye and highlights. Definite trim of my bangs.

If you had a lot of money, do you think you would use it wisely? Absolutely not. I have little to no money now and I don’t even use *that* wisely.

Do you know any rich people who are very irresponsible? I don’t know many people to begin with.

List five careers that you’d like to have: Lawyer (like A.D.A. Barba!)...Graphic Designer...Psychologist...Self-Help writer...and oddly wouldn't mind being a waitress still.

List five far-out things that you’d like to do before you die: I genuinely do not have a bucket list. If I stumble upon something that seems cool, I do it. Making unrealistic lists won't help my quality of life very much.

Do you dream big? Quite the opposite. I sort of just fly by the seat of my pants. Weird expression. Can’t recall ever having very fixated dreams or visions for myself.

What was your first imaginary friend’s name? N/A

What was the name of the first pet that you loved? Comet. <3

What was the first work uniform that you had to wear? Waitress uniform of sorts. I wanna say it was white button down and black pants.

Do you like to go barefoot? Usually. On some surfaces it’s intolerable and I hate the texture, though.

Do you like the same colors now that you did as a kid? Pretty much.

Do you have a blog? You’re on it, buddy. This is a survey blog.

Do you have a youtube channel? What would I even post videos about?? I assure you, I do nothing that the general public would find entertaining.

#survey

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