#anyways I love sanji and I go for the classic pairings

[httpsclarye]

feel like a fucking conservative talking but I think is soooool weird the pedro x sanji pairing like ughhhhh

[honeyshiddendesire]

Dirty Alphabet

Pairing: Luffy x female reader

*banner*

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

What even is that lol If you’re hungry or thirsty I can deadass picture him shouting for Sanji full birthday suit out on display without any shame

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I think his favorite on you would be your waist no matter the size but only for the fact that he wants to wrap around it like the monkey man that he is. His favorite on him would be his arms cause they can pick up meat and all his favorite things like you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

On you or in you and I can see him cumming alot whether he’s pent up or just went multiple roads

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Can totally see him enjoying watching you masterbate without your knowledge. You leave the door open a crack and he wants to bust in but instead I picture him doing a whole head tilt and for the first time sitting there in silence watching you in a trance.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

NAH zero experience until you come along but he figures it out through basic instinct. I feel like Ace and Sabo told him just like basics only

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Mating press and doggy style idk why but I feel like he would love folding you in half and then also bend you completely. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

No shit that man is the epitome of goofy lol a straight looney tune 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Not trimmed at all to him its natural or nothing lol 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Not romantic unless you tell him. The most romance you’ll get is him bringing whipped cream to the bedroom or chocolate so he can eat it off you lol

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Definitely see him jacking off alot after a fight while eating some food but he loves to masturbate along with you 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

FOOD PLAY!! Pouring some chocolate all over and whipped cream licking you like the desert you were meant to be.

Limb stretching! Whether it’s stretching his dick, fingers or his tongue I can picture him being totally turned on to see how much of him you can take. You’re probably a Straw Hat anyways and he knows he has the strongest crew whether on the battlefield or in the bedroom

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The head of the sunny and anywhere else on the ship lol what is privacy for him lol 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

I think he would freak out seeing you eat a popsicle. The classic moment were some melts and you have to lick it off and he just loses it

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I can’t see him wanting to make you bleed, if you have your period that’s fine but him being the one to draw blood is a total no.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Pussy Eating King lol have you seen the way that man cleans a plate? Best believe he’ll lick you exactly the same way and I think he would love receiving. Seeing how hot you look as you gag on his dick as he stretches it to watch you drool all sloppy

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough for sure lol 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Quickies would happen if you ask for them or if you’re eating something that triggers that spark in him then he’ll instantly go feral

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Loves risks he’s a pirate after all so experimenting would be awesome as he’ll see it as a challenge 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Definitely full of energy to go as long as possible till you’re begging him to cum and have mercy on your poor pussy

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Don’t see him as the type when he’s a walking toy himself 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Doesn’t seem like the type to have any patience for that kind of stuff

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Loud and totally unashamed by it. Won't necessarily dirty talk he just happens to speak stuff thats filthy, a moaner groaner and grunter for sure

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Spit kink! Loves seeing your lips glistening with his spit or yours. If you’re sucking him off and sees you drooling then theirs hearts in his eyes all of a sudden

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Pretty average but it’s fine since he can stretch any limb on his body

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Pretty chill unless something sparks his interest

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Almost immediately lol

[yukishirostar]

So people are talking about a post in the Zolu tag by a certain tumblr user in regards to their issues with Zolu as a ship. They shall be unnamed because i dont wish to bring attention to them and instead just want to focus on their arguments because they're not the first people to make some of these points and so this is also an opportunity for me to talk about these things (a tweet is going around on Twitter containing these screenshots with the username so you can find it there if you need to anyway).

The way this person dismisses the relationship between Zoro and Luffy as a result of needing to pair gay Zoro with someone is too laughable, they must be very fit in order to be able to do these mental gymnastics. I believe that many people who are going on about the Zolu scenes in the OPLA were already Zolu shippers who were familiar with the original story and are enjoying the moments because they were well, really good Zolu moments? And there is actually, shockingly, many good Zolu moments in the original story too which is why many people ship them. Wild, I know.

Then there's 'straight-washed Sanji'. Equally if not more of a bizarre thing to believe. I might make some people mad especially the Sanji stans out there who constantly insist on the 'repressed queer' narrative with his character, but Sanji is written pretty explicitly to be seen as a cisgender and heterosexual character. The way you say with your whole chest that Luffy is 'canonically' aroace but don't acknowledge that Sanji is 'canonically' cishet is beyond hypocritical. If you believe Sanji looking like a 'misogynistic straight man' is different from the way he is written in canon then maybe you should go back and reread/rewatch series with your eyes open this time. If you wish to headcanon him with the frankly offensive repressed bisexual/transgender cliché then go ahead, but that is clearly not the intention Oda has with his character.

There's also the fact that aroace people can uh. Be in relationships. Get married. Have children. Did it occur to you that many people who ship Zolu ship them as an ace couple or-

First thing I want to say here, as a trans man who is 'mlm', can other dudes stop with this idea that women or fem-aligned individuals enjoying homosexual relationships between two men is inherently fetishising or that as a masc-aligned individual your enjoyment of a ship is morally superior in some way. Stop pulling out your 'mlm/ transmasc / cis gay' card in order to justify why your ship is superior. Its cringe af.

But if we are to insist that 'cishet female gaze fetishising mlm' is going on then ironically Zosan fits that the better than any ship in the fandom. It being by far the most popular mlm ship means there is likely a higher proportion of people who identify as cishet women who ship it. Its also the classic 'two men who dislike/hate eachother and have a toxic relationship but hot sexual tension' slash/yaoi stereotype. Majority of Zosan I've come across is depicting Zoro as the masculine male man in the relationship while Sanji the effeminate twink that Sanji stans project themselves onto and they go crazy for the bickering that is apparently reminiscent to them of a toxic heterosexual marriage. Meanwhile every Zolu/Luzo shipper I've interacted with has been some flavour of queer and Zolu is closest to the 'falling in love with your same sex bestie' narrative that the majority if not every non-heterosexual person has experienced at least once in their lifetime. This is just my personal view of course, but I think noting a difference in perspective on this topic is interesting and reveals that at the end of the day this is totally subjective and based purely on anecdotes.

Also it's just a very weird point here that apparently OP has 'plenty of varied queer rep' (it actually doesn't have that many canonical queer characters in relation to its cast size but anyway) and other media doesn't so shipping aroace characters in gay relationships is valid in those but not in One Piece … HUH???? So you're saying if One Piece had 'less' queer rep, then Zolu would be fine to ship? Idek my brain hurts.

"I have black friends so I'll speak for the black community and get offended for them" (btw this person then proceeded to block aroace people who had issues with their depiction of aroace people).

Also if we're talking canonical depictions, the only thing Zoro has been canonically depicted as is also aroace, equally if not moreso than Luffy. So by your own rules, you can't ship a cishet (sanji) with an aroace (zoro), therefore Zosan is now invalid. Stop erasing Zoro's aroace identity bigot.

'Categorically wrong' makes me laugh. I don't ship Zoro and Nami but like, people can ship what they want to??

'The general public is aware enough of gay people and how to spot them these days' uh... firstly this sounds very homophobic. Secondly the general public (cishet ppl) are famously bad at recognising queerness even when its in flashing lights before them. Thirdly you make it sound like Zoro was going around on roller skates and booty shorts listening to YMCA and Madonna in the show. I do agree he was gay-coded but it was mostly because he had sexual tension with every man he interacted with, not for the strange reasons you pointed out...

Its kinda the elephant in the room too but like. These are just headcanons. You can have multiple headcanons and interpretations of a character's sexuality. I can see Zoro as aroace virgin one day and a gay h*e the next. I'm actually allowed, legally, to do that.

The way they think shipping Zolu is harmful to aroace representation when BOTH characters are closest to being canonically aroace than anything yet ship Zosan, label being anti-Zolu as some kind of pro-ace activism, and then proceeded to block aroace people for criticising their incorrect depiction of what being aroace is...

This was a lot of words to say that you don't like a ship. Just say you don't like it, and it gets in the way of the ship you like, instead of writing a virtue signalling essay to justify your reasoning. Please.

They had some more to say on future posts I'll just pick my favourite bits

They really have this narrative that Zolu is only popular because of OPLA and can't fathom that its just a popular ship in general and always has been huh. And they couldn't make it more obvious that they're totally salty about it ranking in the top 100 most popular tumblr ships, lmao.

Your classic case of 'self-identifying ally who speaks over the people they are supposed allies of'. Its a general rule that you feel the need to declare yourself an ally you're probably not an ally, actual allies know they need to just shut up and do the work. Saying 'this character's aroace' and 'I have aroace friends' actually isn't what allyship is, thats just accepting that ace people exist which is like... the baseline.

Calling a wholesome loving ship like Zolu an icky ship is a severe consequence of online brain (this person is 26 years old btw)

[britishassistant]

I just can't with these AU's my mind keeps going to how I think Mayu would React and just Fall into unstoppable giggles at everyone's reactions, if its anything like I think it goes it would be even funnier than the classic meeting, and don't even get me started on all three Yuu's meeting each other somehow.

Mayu: HONRY JAIL FOR ALL OF YOU *bonks with bokken*

This. This is why Mayu likes One Piece. Mayu wouldn’t have to deal with all this dumb romance peacocking and lame black-and-white hero vs villain stuff in One Piece.

Pirates are way cooler than superheroes and supervillains anyway. Seriously, these guys are worse than Sanji for turning into lovesick idiots!

The supervillains and superheroes are very confused by the twelve year old with the wooden sword who dresses like a ninja yet claims they’re a pirate. They don’t exactly wanna hurt the kid, but the brat’s sword swings and kicks actually are pretty painful...

Yuu the reporter is also very confused by the twelve year old with the wooden sword, but at least they haven’t bonked the reporter yet.

And then Yuu turns their back for one minute to convince Leona not to put the girl in one of his death traps. When they look back, the child is gone.

Panik.

Mayu inadvertently kidnaps Cheka on her journey of mayhem across the city and begins teaching him the ways of piracy by telling him stories about One Piece. It’s going pretty well, until an opportunistic mugger draws a gun on the pair in a dark alley, with the aim of kidnapping Cheka and blackmailing Farena with his son’s safety.

Mayu freezes.

She can barely stand between Cheka and their assailant, let alone tell him to run, trembling, breath coming in harsh pants. Her eyes are tearing up as they’re fixed on the barrel of the gun, aimed at her head, a small whimper escaping her throat as the hammer is cocked—!

King descends like the wrath of a merciless god.

The Prefect has to intervene to stop him from disintegrating the mugger entirely. Though they may let him beat the mugger a little longer than strictly necessary to neutralize the hostile target and keep the children safe. They eventually get through to him by reminding him that Cheka is right there and will see if Leona decides to give the mugger the ultimate punishment.

King compromises not getting to enact as much violence as he wanted by dumping the mugger at his brother’s feet and telling him exactly what the bastard was planning to do with his son.

Then he leaves the shaking, crying, begging mugger to Farena’s mercy.

Cheka and Mayu are taken to Yuu’s apartment by the Prefect, and given hot cocoa and blankets before Yuu emerges from their bedroom after the Prefect vanishes, fussing over the pair and putting on a movie that Charon reccomended for them. Studio Ghibli is good for the soul, even if it doesn’t have pirates.

Leona arrives later, after the two children have curled up on Yuu’s couch, fast asleep. He stays the night, tail flickering as he keeps watch, until Cheka wakes up the next morning. Yuu stays up with him, one hand carding through Mayu’s hair.

Tomorrow, the two children will still be a little shaken from their adventure, but ready to say goodbye and return home to their respective loving parents.

But for now, the supervillain and the reporter will keep guard over them, the best defended apartment in the city quiet save for their breathing.

[soulessrobot]

I spent a ridiculous amount of time yesterday thinking about Straw Hat Buddy Cop AUs and which one would be the most ridiculous partner dynamics. These can all be viewed as separate Aus or be forced into some big amalgamation of these ideas which would be the most dysfunctional police department in the world. 

Nami and Zoro: Alright not going to lie out of all of these this is probably one of my favorites and the one I spent the longest thinking about. I’m a sucker for Zoro-Nami interactions. This partnership is classic brains and brawn. Nami starts as a dirty cop that joined the force as part of the Arlong Gang. Nami hates the Arlong Gang but they have her home neighborhood completely under their thumb and if she wants to keep her people safe she has to compromise her morals. Nami has duped every partner since she joined the force and she thinks Zoro will be no different. Zoro has an incredible pain tolerance and discipline when he wants to be he can be a force of nature. His father Mihawk was the world’s best bounty hunter and Zoro learned his fighting prowess from him His sister, Perona, is a private detective who will sometimes help Zoro out by giving him tips. Zoro cannot read maps or operate the gps system. He by order of chief Garp is not allowed to drive the police cruiser because he can never get to crime scenes on time even when he turns his lights on. Somehow Zoro always seems to end up at crime scenes before they happen and prevent the crime though... Nami thinks Zoro is an idiot she’s not wrong, he constantly forgets his wallet places and she’s always covering his debts for him. They bicker almost constantly. Zoro is rather fond of it because it reminds him of Perona. Zoro saves Nami’s life in a shoot out. Zoro seems to know something is up with Nami even though everyone else missed it. After a particularly brutal case he tells her that she can tell him and he’ll find a way to help her. Nami declines but doesn’t know how to feel, she hasn’t had someone take care of her since before Arlong’s takeover. Zoro by accident ends up in the sights of the Arlong Gang and Nami has to make the choice of if she’s willing to sacrifice the one person who could actually help her. 

Franky and Robin: I’m torn on this one between making it a police au where they are actually partners or making it into a mob au where Robin is a FBI investigator trying to make a case against the Franky Family a group of robin hood con men. Either way Robin graduated top of her class and was recruited straight into the FBI from college. She’s worked with multiple sections in the FBI but her specialties are organized crime, forgery and profiling. She’s not usually in the field but as the targets of the Franky Family grow in notoriety she ends up going undercover to try and catch him. Franky is a con man whose running a Leverage-esque gig. He’s out for the little guy. His family would never screw him over they’re in it to steal the rich blind and give to the poor. Franky is an inventor who makes his own gadgets for their heist. Franky’s personality and ethics start to grow on Robin as she gets closer to her target she almost doesn’t want to catch him. Does she defect? Who knows?  

Sanji and Usopp: Sanji comes from a rich family with deep political connections in the city. He wants nothing to do with them. They’ve basically disowned him for joining the force.  Sanji has a serious weakness for ladies that has a tendency to get them into to trouble on their cases. He’s a real bleeding heart to the plight of women and kids. He has a serious vendetta about domestic abusers. Usopp has a keen eye for details and spots things that everyone else may have overlooked. At first Sanji is really disappointed he didn’t get paired with Robin or Nami but Usopp grows on him. Usopp wins Sanji over when they discover a shared love of supporting family owned restaurants all over the city.  Usopp sometimes catches ‘cantgetoutofthecruiseritis’ but its been getting less and less frequent with Sanji watching his back. 

Chopper and Brook: The weirdest team-up of the old man on the verge of retiring who the department loves and the wide eyed new recruit. Brook has a habit of telling Chopper things that are totally untrue about how the force used to run back in the day. Chopper is starting to get better at catching on to when Brook is trying to full a fast one on him. Chopper is still new but he tries his best everyday. He spends all of his free time studying first aid and non violent deescalation tactics. He visits a lot of people he helped to put away in jail and helps them find resources to turn their lives around. Brook has a lot of hope in what young people like Chopper will mean for the future police force. Brook has dozens of cassettes in his police cruiser with all different types of music on them. He has a rescue dog named Laboon who likes to howl along while Brook sings in the car. His cruiser is the oldest on the force.

Luffy and Usopp: Luffy in any police force AU is the maverick constantly on the verge of being fired. It’s not because he has some gritty vigilante code (though he does have a heart of gold!) but because he actually is dumb as rocks about processes and procedures but is like a blood hound with a ridiculously good instinct for tracking down the bad guys. Luffy doesn’t carry a gun and handles everything with his fists because that’s the way a man does it. His grandfather was one of the best cops in their country and everyone expects that from Luffy. Luffy does not care he’s here to kick the bad guys ass and help the little guy.  Usopp has always wanted to be a field officer because his father was a detective before he died on the job. On the force he’s been a beat cop and paper pusher in the office he’s absolutely terrified about doing undercover work. When he gets partnered with Luffy he’s so excited Their first ride together turns into a high speed police chase against kidnappers. Usopp is terrified and Luffy spends the whole ride laughing. Over time they develop a record case solving rate that no one at the department can figure out. The answer is they just bumble into it in a truly Psych-esque fashion. Now that I think about it Luffy and Usopp really do have Shawn-Gus vibes and a Psych AU could totally work for them. 

Luffy and Law: Lets be real this would literally be their canon relationship. Law has no idea what he’s getting into. He’s the lone wolf at the department and has no desire to be partnered with anyone let alone the grandson of the chief. Law’s sole motivation for life and for joining law enforcement is to take on Doflamingos criminal empire that killed his foster father and then got to walk. He’s spent years building a case against the man. Their first case starts as a robbery to a toy store and ends with them finding a multi-million blood diamond smuggling ring. Law still can’t answer how they got there but someone has to write the report and its definitely not Luffy. Law over time gets strapped with doing all of Luffy’s paperwork. Luffy is really excited to have Law as a partner and somehow worms the way into the other mans heart. They would both take a bullet for each other. 

Robin and Jimbei: Okay lets be real this would be the most serious partner team up. Robin and Jimbei would both be great detectives, they would follow the rules (or not get caught when they break them), catch the bad guys and one of them would end up as chief as police by the end. Robin might end up as a forensic investigator who makes morbid little jokes to watch all the newbies squirm. 

In summary none of the Straw Hats should be police officers except Robin but she’s way to good for it anyway. Please add your own thoughts about the hilarity of the Straw Hats in the force or use any of these weird headcanons/plot bunnies in anyway you want. I just had to get them out of my head. 

[arlongsbabygirl]

Heyo! Could I possibly get a matchup!? I’m fine with both antagonists and protags! I’m a big INTJ 18yo gal, who is too pale for her own good (I had to break it to my dermatologist that the reason I don’t have a lot of sun damage is because I just don’t go outside, rip me). Despite me not wanting to leave the house, I do make exceptions for my close friends (clearly not right now, but that’s besides the point). I have short dark brown hair with the front two strands dyed light green. Which would be really cool if I weren’t colorblind and relying on others to make sure it really is green. My eyes are also a mystery! I’ve heard everything from a deep blue to completely gray to a gray-green. I just say my eyes are gray. I’ve been told I have a dry sense of humor, which I guess is true, but typically I really only joke with close friends. Also, although I am 5’2” (we don’t talk about my height in this household) and have almost no muscle, I have apparently scared a couple of my teachers… whoops. I assume it’s due to my resting angry face, but I swear I just want to be people’s friend! I am surprisingly kind and it can catch people off guard because they wouldn’t expect that out of me. In my spare time I love to write and practice my German! I’ve always been a fan of classical literature; currently, I am working my way through Don Quixote. You can also find me reading aloud Julius Caesar in the middle of the night as it is one of my favorite Shakespeare plays. I’m also a fan of anything horror related. Horror movies, novels, games, etc.. I’m an environmental biology major, and yes I am a tad bit of a hippie, but I was raised that way. Also, I am a slytherin and a gemini! Both of which seem to accurately describe me. Thank you so much :D

                                                                                     - @dumbassvinsmoke​

———————————————————————————————————

Hiyah dear !! I am so happy to see you requesting a matchup. This is my first One Piece matchup but obviously not my first first one haha. So as I was reading your request, you got really detailed and I absolutely love it. Now while reading, I started to see you with only one character and I know that’s bad however I’m gonna match you with them anyway because I love the concept :)

I am going to pair you with … 

                                   𝐍𝐢𝐜𝐨 𝐑𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐧

【Ｔｈｅ　Ｂｏｏｋｓｍａｒｔ　Ｌｏｖｅｒｓ】

You wouldn’t have met Miss Nico Robin if it weren’t for your mutual love for good literature. You never liked going outside as whenever you did the sunburn after was just so painful, so you spent most of your time in the library. You met her while she was working for Baroque Works inside the library Crocodile coveted with the most passion despite his hate for reading. You were reading a book that had been left out called ‘Don Quixote’. It was Robin’s book yet you did not know this as you basically tore through the pages in curiosity. You are a rather fast reader so you had nearly finished the book in about two days yet when you came back to finish the book, Robin or as you knew her, Miss All Sunday, was sat in your chair reading it. From that point on you two bonded through literature, suggesting books and plays to each other and even learning about one another. Within a few months, you and Robin were nearly inseparable though it wasn’t obvious during work hours. You both began to get paired up for missions due to your amazing strategy skills and trust in each other. It wasn’t until Robin meeting the Straw Hats did she reveal her true feelings for you. You never wanted to say anything but the tingle you felt every time her fingers brushed yours couldn’t be denied any longer. Robin and you began to date from that point on and when Robin decided to stow away on the ship, you followed. You stood behind the extremely tall beauty hand in hand with her when she asked if you both could join the crew. No one seemed to care you were in a same-sex relationship though Sanji was sad because he didn’t have a chance with two beautiful ladies. Luffy accepted you both into the crew though Nami began to grow to hate you since your taste in literature was expensive so you spent many Berri on books knowing Robin would prevent the Cat from hurting you.

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Here we go love :DD I hope you like it :3

[neverwatchedonepiece]

531-533: "The Ryugu Palace! Taken by the Shark that they Saved!", "A Coward and a Crybaby! The Princess in the Hard Shell Tower!" and "It's an Emergency! The Ryugu Palace is Occupied!"

Pappagu’s gonna stroke out with stress. Yup. Any minute now.

Loved these episodes! The humour that took an exit stage left during Marineford (for obvious reasons) is back. Most of the humor was comedy of errors type stuff. We had Luffy accidentally bouncing on some giant mermaid tiddies. Luffy being unwittingly rude and poor Pappagu nearly having a stress embolism (look at those veins!) There was Zoro getting drunk and waking up in a jail cell. Brook, Usopp, Nami and Zoro accidentally occupying the entire palace and taking a bunch of important hostages... xD

There were some short updates on other characters too. Some have already had an impact on the plot. Caribou has kidnapped some Mermaids with intent to sell them at the Sabaody slave market. Without knowing it, he has exacted perfect revenge on the Strawhats! But how will you leave Fishman Island, Caribou. You don’t have a ship, you absolute roaster. 

Others I’m guessing Oda is keeping up his sleeve for later. Robin, Franky, Sanji and Chopper are still at large. Robin is wandering the island in search of important evidence of missing history. Franky, bless his mechanical heart, is off looking for Tom-san’s family. Chopper is done treating Sanji. He has a new point: Kung Fu Point. Nice to see that Chopper has some more offensive abilities that don’t completely strip him of his intelligence. :)

That’s Some Nice Real Estate, Neptune. Would Be A Shame If Someone Occupied It.

You know what? I like Neptune. His advisors might browbeat him, but at least he’s the type of ruler who will listen to advice, even if he doesn’t take it. He has his own mind and will follow his inner sense of justice, though it might conflict with what his advisors tell him.

Luffy on the Fish Boat back to Ryugu Palace was hilarious, though. Neptune kept doing a Jason Derulo: saying his own damned name all the time in the little songs he sang to himself and Luffy was like, “Mate, your chant is dumb.”  (I mean, Luffy, you’re not wrong but maybe not to the king’s face next time?) Either Neptune is chilled enough to ignore it, or he didn’t hear, Pappagu did, though, and was on hand to give Luffy a five-armed starfish spanking.

Neptune cares about his family too. The princess’ happiness is important and as she can’t get out the house much (more on that later) rescuing Megalo was a Big Deal. “Didn’t mean to save you, but I’m glad you’re okay!”

Too honest, Luffy! xD

Then Neptune told the Strawhats that one of their crewmates was already there. I knew instantly it was Zoro. Only Zoro could be that hopelessly lost that he’d accidentally infiltrate a palace with only one heavily guarded entrance and a buzzer system.

There was also a handy bit of world-building. Neptune handed Luffy a device that looked suspiciously like a pink dildo with multipurpose attachments. It was called Bubbly Coral and enables the user to form their own oxygen bubbles whenever, wherever. Useful.

They zoomed through the entrance flume and emerged into a beautiful place full of light, grand buildings, colour and dragon statues. Dat real estate.

As soon as Neptune stepped through the door, his Minister of the Right advisor (seahorse guy) got laid into him. “WTF, my lord?? You went out again on your own? You know the situation in this country??” Neptune is like Princess Jasmine All he needs is a cute Sea Tiger pet and he’s sorted. Either that, or Neptune is confident enough in his strength to face whatever’s out there. 

The Minister of the Left (catfish guy) took one look at the company Neptune had brought back and was like, “Um.... my lord, there’s something you should know about those Strawhat Pirates.” They spilled the current intel: Memaids had been kidnapped, which is something human pirates are known to do, and Madame Sharley had predicted Luffy would destroy Fishman Island. Unconscious Zoro had already been taken into custody. The rest of the Strawhats were under arrest!

(I’m having doubts about this Madame Sharley, by the way. I wonder if she’s working with Hordy Jones, or is being forced to work with him? Zero basis for this prediction. Only that the timing of the prediction is pretty damned convenient...)

Then Everyone Fell Out

Suddenly, the Strawhats were surrounded by guards. I say the Strawhats. I mean Usopp, Nami and Brook because Luffy had gone AWOL (more on that later). The Mermen made a sensible, tactical decision to burst the Strawhats’ bubbles and force them to fight in the water. But they made the mistake of showing Nami how to operate the Bubbly Coral. She used a giant one to drain the room of water. (Good job, Nami. Quick thinking as usual!) Brook had a badass moment. That’s why I like him. He can go from his goofy, kind, fun-loving self to scary swordsman with a snap of his bony fingers.

Usopp was ready to throw down, which was a nice surprise. I was so hyped to see what his new weapon can do, but was blue-balled. Ah, well. Next time! :D

Oh, and Zoro let himself out of jail. xD

Or Zori, as Neptune kept calling him. Another trait to add to Neptune being a stand up guy was that he volunteered to fight Zori because he didn’t want anyone else getting hurt. A good king!

The next thing, Zoro had plowed through everyone and Usopp was freaking out about overkill! “FFS, Zoro! We were just going to intimidate them and run!”

Zoro thought, “Yes. Run. Let’s bail.”

Usopp said, “A great plan, but we don’t know where Sunny is. Plus, the coating came off when we crashed through the bubble.”

Nami also added that the Log Pose had been unstable ever since they arrived (what does that mean?)

Then a nearby DDM rang.

Accidental Criminals

This whole scene was hilarious. Honestly, I came into this arc expecting lots of heavy stuff about Fishman vs humans racism and I’m getting accidental criminal activity and comedy hostage-takings. It’s awesome.

Zoro picked up the DDM and Usopp freaked out. “Don’t pick it you, you dumbass!” It was Fukaboshi, the eldest Merprince. He asked Zoro to open the gate.

“Yeah, no can do. But I’ll tell you what you can do...”

For Zoro had spied an Opportunity. (For all everyone calls Zoro a dumbass, he can be really clever sometimes).

“We have your father and the palace hostage. We need a new coating for the Sunny. And we need the rest of our crew: a gloomy woman, a robot, a raccoon, and a dirty water imp.”

“HAHAHAH, a dirty water imp. Classic!” Brook chortled.

“Oh, and a million Berry in cash, please, Zoro,” Nami added.

The Strawhats really have taken a level in grey morality, it’s hilarious. Their reactions to Zoro’s Big Idea were even more than I’d have expected from them two years ago (except Nami. She’s always had half an eye on treasure).  And they are clearly confident they can escape from Fishman Island in one piece.

Fukaboshi agreed because he had no choice. It seems he’s a stand up kinda guy too, because he delivered a message from Jimbei to Luffy (this caused a stir in the palace. Jimbei is even more godly down there than on the surface).

The message was: “Do not fight against Hordy. I will meet you at the Sea Forest.”

Do not fight against Hordy? Really? There’s history between them, right? Jimbei and Hordy, I mean. They were both Sun Pirates. Or is that Arlong and Jimbei? Yeah, I think it’s Arlong and Jimbei. But maybe Hordy was also on that crew? 

Something is up here...

But I never found out what because some Big Booms happened off-panel in the direction of the Princess’ room.

Which happened to be where Luffy was, of course.

Princess Peach

So Luffy, who only came to the palace for food, got fed up within 0.5 seconds of arriving and wandered off. He came across a pair of massive, solid-looking doors. A pair of axes were embedded in them. Must admit my first thought was, “Oh cool, the princess is an angry, fighting type!”

Nope. Completely wrong.

Luffy sneaked inside because he could smell food. One thing led to another and he ended up bouncing on the giant Mermaid Princess’ giant tiddies. (If Sanji ever finds out, he will never speak to Luffy again.) 

Of course, she woke up and was like, “Why is there a tiny human bouncing on my tiddies? I did not consent to this.” And she shrieked and cried, as you would if some hungry, little random was bouncing on you. I love how Luffy could not deal with her giant tears. It’s one of his rare weaknesses. Like, what, why are you crying, stop, plz, I did nothing to you.

Turns out the Princess is not a fighting type. She is actually a terrified, sweet girl who has been locked in a Hard Shell Tower for ten years because Captain Bloody Vander Decken is an annoying fucking sex-pest who will not take no for an answer!

The action briefly cut to him ranting away about how he was convinced Neptune wanted to force her into a political marriage because she was really in love with Decken. That he could not allow her to be with anyone else and he would rather see her dead than with anyone else. “Your life is either death or marriage. I will present her this lovely boomerang axe with a rose on it.” You know, because if you’re going to be decapitated, I guess it’s nice to know it’s done with love and good intentions, right? Absolutely insane. This guy is Major Incel Material.

Of course, Decken’s latest “gift” whirled into the room and Luffy stopped it. He was like, “WTF, where did this come from?”

The Guards burst in and the Princess saved Luffy’s ass by hiding him. Of course, Luffy overheard what had happened to the others. He wasn’t bothered. “Meh, that’s fine. Your lot won’t be able to control them, anyway.” Just goes to show how much faith Luffy has in his crew’s strength after those two years. 

To repay Luffy, the Princess said he could eat her giant food. While he ate, she asked him questions. The most interesting was this one:

“You’re a pirate,” she said. “Does that mean you’re a bad person?”

Luffy thought about this, then answered, “Hmm... I dunno. You decide.”

(Just another incident to add to my growing: Luffy’s Grey Morality Evidence Pile.)

The Princess told Luffy Decken has a DF power called Mark Mark. It sounds pretty useful, actually, (which is bad for her). If he designates someone as his mark, he can throw a weapon and hit them every time, unless an obstacle is in the way. That’s why she’d been locked in the Tower for ten years.

Luffy was confused, as you would be if someone told you that. “He wants to marry you but wants to kill you? WTF?” and said, “Ten years? You must be bored. I’d get sick if someone locked me up for ten years.”

Then he yelled at her because she poked his cheeks while he was eating (tbh, that would make me mad too. Just because he’s little does not mean Luffy is a pet!) But she’s just a lonely girl with minimal social skills because she’s been locked up for so long and she could not handle Luffy yelling at her.

Luffy being Luffy, was honest to the point of being Super Harsh. “You might be big, but you’re a coward and a crybaby. I don’t like you! You’ve stayed hear for ten years, eh? That could make you sick. Isn’t there anywhere you wanna go? Come on, let’s go for a walk!”

Luffy gave her the Unblinking Luffy Stare.

There is no returning from that.

Once he puts an idea in someone’s head and gives them That Look, they are done for.

The whole meeting the Princess scenes reminded me of the Big Baby from Spirited Away. The one who wouldn’t go outside because Yubaba had told him all about germs and he was afraid but was still fascinated by Chihiro because he was lonely and wanted her to play. Except this situation is more complicated because Neptune is a Good Dad and only wants to protect his daughter from a pest who he is trying to arrest but cannot find. It’s for her safety. Just as well Luffy is there with a cunning plan to get her out for a walk, eh?

Nah, Luffy. Absolutely no one will realise there’s something up here... xD

Sex-Pest Shakes Hands With Roid Peddler

Meanwhile, the shady villains have teamed up! I don’t think that’s happened in One Piece yet. It’s an alliance of convenience based on a common enemy. They both hate Neptune for different reasons. Hordy’s is political. Decken’s? Because he’s a sex-pest.

Prediction? I bet Hordy will betray Decken. Evidence? None. Just wishful thinking. I want to see Decken get his pathetic ass kicked. 

“And I would like to add a side order of salt and chili fries to our ransom demands.”

[incognitomoustache]

Been awhile (and nobody cares about this, but) One Piece chapter 910 talk!

Just recently got back into an OP mood (something my followers probably have noticed. Sorry! Know that’s not why most of you follow me.) which is a pretty good feeling tbh. I think I’ve at least temporarily achieved a state of mind where I’ll be able to not dwell on the flaws of this series too much (even though I’m not going to ignore them by any means), especially concerning the sexism and the role I wish female characters got to play...

anyway!

This cover story is really dragging, but Orlumbus seems to be a sweet guy, at least. Thought about this last week as well, but that town has some fun designs going on (even though it appears it’s quite sad more close up).

Chopper doing his best to fix the damages to the Sunny is so great! Love you, little guy! Also, kinda fun detail that we can see Sanji spying the contents of the newspaper from afar, leading up to the next panel (which as always is *sigh* just the way Sanji is I guess).

Sanji and Chopper’s poses, tho

I mean, I’m never really a fan of this aspect of Sanji’s personality, but this panel is kind of funny considering the princesses and co. where in fact all chatting about Luffy a few chapters ago. Nami’s dismissive answer is great.

This is the cutest shit aaaaah (lmao at Sanji’s line, though. Arguably a good observation but RUDE).

Nami’s reactions concerning people bothering her reading is great throughout btw

Such a gag reason for them not being prepared for Kaido and Big Mom maybe meeting at Wano. I like it, though XD

Brook basically telling Luffy to be patient is <3 since he more than anyone has had to wait to be reunited with his loved one (those words feel kind of weird to use for a whale, but you know what I mean)

The den den mushi looks like it doesn’t appreciate Luffy screaming at its face. Also, who is it that’s entering the panel I wonder?~

A few things:

1. Nami’s new outfit is cute (obviously ridiculously short, but what else is new). Brook’s outfit has a very classic look which I very much like.

2. The way the octopus wasn’t mentioned for this whole 2-page spread made me think I’d missed a page somewhere when I first read this, and I had to go back and check (I didn’t notice the tentacle creeping in on the previous page the first time around). I love its design! it’s so great! Considering its headband, I wonder if it’s a carpenter?

3. You can already see on this page how the artwork mimics the style of classic japanese art à la The Great Wave off Kanagawa, which we get a very direct reference to a few pages later:

(btw, this panel is amazing. A question the crew has to ask about their captain very often):

anyway

Man....this arc is gonna be so full of references to japanese culture, geography, mythology etc, and I know most of them are gonna fly right over my head, but I know about this one, at least! :D

....so I guess they got sucked in and then washed up on the shore? I wonder if the rest of the crew got washed up somewhere else..? And if so, are they all gonna be separated for a while? I hope the octopus gets paired up with someone fun (aka not Chopper. That’s be too convenient). I hope it’s Nami or Brook. 

(Also, been thinking since Big Mom jumped on the ship: Franky is gonna freak when he sees the Sunny)

ehehehehehe

infallible logic.

I’m excited about this arc! Granted, Oda is usually very good at exciting and promising starts to arcs, but the arc can later turn out to be a bit of a disappointment *cough*Dressrosa*cough* but I’m holding out hope for this one! The scenery is definitely gonna be amazing if nothing else.

I started listening to The One Piece Podcast which is really fun! They often have the official japanese –> english translator on, and he can shed a light on many puns and other things easily lost in translation. Makes me feel kind of bad about reading these fan translations, but not sure where I can read the official translations without waiting for the volumes to be released. The guys on the podcast also remember way more details and are way more observant than me, which is fun.