#apologise to everything including inanimate objects

[phantom-of-the-501st]

All I can think of is that time when @inkstainedhandswithrings said that every time I'd call someone a twat, she could only read everything after it in a British accent

whats a stereotype for your country that you absolutely do. mine is that i unironically go "eh" and apologize a lot and i often drink maple syrup straight

[like-rain-or-confetti]

The Monster You Wanted (Alec Volturi x Reader)

Warning: Dark themes! Blood! Violence!

After being turned into a vampire, the persons human loved ones would deem them unrecognisable. Physically their loved ones features have altered. They're beautiful but some can't ignore the pit in their stomach when seeing the piercing stare their loved one has. However, the biggest change is actually in personality. 

For the first year, a vampires sole purpose is to quench their never ending bloodlust. They'd do anything to get it. Driven mad by constant thirst for human blood. So much so there's almost nothing left to be seen of the human that was once known. A monster wearing a loved ones skin. 

After that first year, the person that used to be can come back, but never entirely. Those who were caring, will begin to care that little bit more after that year. Although underneath, there is still the predatory instincts that require a level-head. Not everyone has the patience of a saint. No longer are vampires strangers to violence. A perfect mix of a terrifying monster and the human that used to be. 

In theory, you shouldn't have been any different. Yet there was no doubt that you were. You were the latest addition to the Olympic coven and almost everyone knew about you. You were very young, barely over six months since your transformation. By definition, you here half way through newborn stage. Although not once in that time had you acted like a newborn. You avoided humans like the plague, finding the smell too much. Although this went beyond self control. It also included the immense guilt you felt at the very thought of feeding from a human. Furthermore, you were more kind than anyone in the Cullen's could ever be. You thought the best of everyone to the extent it was almost naive. 

Some found it strange, off putting such as Peter and Charlotte. So much so that they tried to keep their distance just in case you were to snap. Although you never did. Others, like the Romanians and the Volturi thought it childish, and pathetic. It made you almost outcast from the rest seeing nothing you had done in your vampire life was normal. You were kind but quiet. Unlike any vampire surrounding you, coven or not, it was known you couldn't hurt a fly and everything about that in their eyes was just plain wrong. 

It was you and Emmett who were sent to fetch the Volturi. Knowing their past, it wouldn't go down well if the wolves caught sight of any unknown vampire. Especially those who belong to the Volturi. Emmett's goofy personality was long gone and watched each Volturi like a hawk for even the smallest of movements. It was of no surprise that Carlisle sent the muscle of the coven as well as the newborn. It was a surprise considering it was you. The most harmless newborn ever known. 

Although your kindness could appeal to the leaders. Aro knew Carlisle well. "Ah, young (Y/N). It is always a delight to be greeted with such a lovely face." You rocked back and forth on your heels. It was common given how much adrenaline you had most of the time. Sometimes you just couldn't sit still. Although many considered it an easy fix, a few newborn rages would fix such an issue. "Hello." You said simply with a smile. "Carlisle sent us to fetch you. Just so you don't run into any issues with the pack." "That is appreciated, dear." Marcus responded. "Although unnecessary." Caius added with a small scowl. Your head quickly turned to Emmett. "Let's go!" You chirped, skipping back to the house, your hands behind your back.  "How childish." Felix said to Demetri under his breath. "They're a newborn, be glad someone's pleased to see you." Emmett responded with snark. "Keep your voice down." "Or what? They'll hug me to death?" Felix challenged. "It's not (Y/N) you'll be dealing with." Emmett looked back at Felix. "Emmett." Rosalie warned as you skipped by her with a grin and without a care in the world and into the Cullen home. Almost like you hadn't heard the exchange. 

"Thank you, Emmett." Carlisle approached the door with a smile as the group entered. "What about me!?" You cried out from upstairs. "Thank you as well, (Y/N)!" Carlisle called back with an amused smile before addressing the Volturi. "My apologies I couldn't come out to meet you. I had a phone call from the hospital." "Not at all, Carlisle." Aro responded. 

Felix and the twins moved into the sitting room where Emmett, yourself and Jasper were. You stared at the remote for the TV like it held the world's secrets. "(Y/N), it's easy just pick it up gently." Emmett said. "My gentle isn't the same as your gentle!" You replied. "I don't want to break it!" "You have broken a grand total of four things in this house, (Y/N). All of us have done that in fifteen minutes. Just pick it up. You're overthinking it." Emmett said with ease. "I have to overthink it or I will break it." You replied again. Your hand hovered over the remote, pulling back every time you got close to touching it as if it had bit you. The three guards couldn't believe what they were seeing. Here was a newborn of seven months, jerking away from an inanimate object like it could hurt them. Each guard broke many things in minutes without thinking, including necks. It was very apparent on their faces since Jasper gave them a cold stare in warning. Next thing the Volturi guards knew, you had grasped the remote and apologising to it. They couldn't believe their eyes. "Take it!" You chanted hurriedly to Emmett who chuckled and took it from you. That night, you were agitated. You were hunched over, arms across your stomach and a hand on your throat. Meanwhile Felix and Alec were in the room with you, watching as this went down. They heard you stifling small groans and trying to clear your throat. "What's wrong?" Felix asked but didn't really care. "Nothing." You whispered doubling over a little further. "Seriously, what's with you?" Felix rolled his eyes. That's when Caius walked in and behind him, Jasper. Jasper looked at you. "It's about time you fed. You know it doesn't affect us the same way." You shook your head. "Come, I'll go with you. It's time." You sighed rising to a stand. Jasper led you out the door leaving the Volturi members in the room alone. "They had to be prompted to feed? Disgraceful." Caius sneered. "They feel guilt often." Carlisle said as he walked into the room. "They aren't quite used to and accepting if this life yet." "It's been seven months." Caius responded coldly. "Even you can admit their behaviour is a little odd, Carlisle." "Perhaps, but what would that change?" Carlisle lightly shrugged. "It's unheard of but they haven't been a problem to you or to me." 

Alec sat on a tree branch rather high up, enjoying the night when you returned. "I didn't take you as the climbing trees kind!" You called up to him with a smile. Alec lightly shrugged. You eyed the route to the branch he was on. It was simple enough. The branch trembled as you moved to sit beside him on the branch. Using the branch above as leverage and stepping over him. Alec internally sighed, it seemed the solitude was short lived. "Are you okay? I usually wouldn't think anything of it but you're out here alone whilst your sister is inside." You asked. "Well we aren't conjoined twins." Alec said coldly and you seemed taken aback. Such tone would have caused any other newborn to attack but not you. Never you. The silence made him rethink his words. "What I mean to say is that I'm fine. My sister and I always spend some time apart. It isn't exactly healthy to spend so much time with someone." "Oh, as long as you're okay. Do you want me to leave you alone?" "Do what you wish." Alec responded. "I won't force you to leave after all your effort to get up here and not break the tree." Alec hadn't meant it to be funny. In fact if anything it was supposed to be insulting. Yet you laughed, seeing the funny side. "Well when you put it that way." You swung your legs. "I'll stick around." Alec hummed. "Not many people would willingly choose my company." Alec mused with a hum. "I'm not like most people." You responded flatly, your smile long gone as you looked up into the sky. 

Alec turned his head to look at you and in that moment he knew that you knew how everyone felt about you. "Are you feeling better?" Alec asked. "A little. It did more for my stomach than it did my throat if I'm honest. I thought a mountain lion would have done the trick." Alec wanted to call you an idiot. You didn't have to be the smartest to know that newborns were ravenous. Not even a whole pack of mountain lions would have been enough. Furthermore, animal blood was no where near as fulfilling as human blood. "Well," Alec said whilst looking around. "If you start feeling hungry again, I'm sure there are a few squirrels around." You giggled. "I never knew you were funny." Alec hummed again. "I don't know how you can sustain yourself on that. Animal blood. I never understood in general but a newborn? I don't know how you aren't destroying villages at the very thought." You shrugged. "I've never had human blood so I have nothing to compare it to. Besides, from what I heard. It's better that way. Seemingly once you have human blood its really hard to go back." "Will you at least admit that it's disgusting?" Alec asked, turning to look at you. You bit back a smile. "Go on, admit it. It's disgusting." "It is but, it works." You admitted and Alec rolled his eyes. 

"I hear you've been in the Volturi for a very long time." You spoke up. "Yes, a very long time." Alec answered. "Do you remember what it was like to be a newborn?" "Not entirely. You remember it differently from the other years of your existence.i remember destroying and burning my village to the ground. I remember the rage I felt, the ravenous hunger but it's like remembering a dream. Nothing directly reminds me of it." Alec said. You went quiet, deep in thought. "I couldn't imagine going through what you and your sister did. I found it vile, how anyone could do that to another person." "Not everyone is like you, (Y/N). People usually hate what they don't understand. There are people in the world who want to hurt people, who live for it...like I do." You turned your head to Alec. "I've always been honest. That night changed my sister and I. I don't have an issue with hurting people despite what my gift may be." "You think people should suffer because you did?" You asked quietly and Alec nodded. "Not the best outlook but it's there. I don't intend on changing that any time soon. In fact, that makes me wonder about you." "Me?" "My experiences made me who I am today. So what happened to you to make you the way you are?" You lowered your head. "There really isn't a story to tell." You admitted. "A vampire came across me, thought I was sweet. They figured it was enough reasoning to change me. Carlisle found me before I woke up. I never found out who they were." After a moment of thought, you lightly shrugged. "I don't really believe it changed me much...or at all." "You've never wandered, strayed from the Cullen way of living?" Alec asked. "No, I don't have any intention either. Why?" "It's not often that newborns stay put and in control. You find they like to go nomadic. They just don't do well in covens. Although, I can't say it's impossible. Here you are." "You know I'll always be around." You smiled brightly. 

Days passed and he found himself spending more time with you than intended. He didn't dare admit you were growing on him. Instead, he did his best to swallow it down and pretend it wasn't there. 

You had been used to comments about you by now. Everyone made your behaviour known to be different. You’d be lying if they hadn’t begun to take their toll since the Volturi had arrived. It just meant more pairs of eyes casting judgement on what you should be rather than what you were. The Volturi considered newborn vampires, uncontrollable monsters. Therefore you couldn’t understand why they took such issue with you being the exact opposite. Then again, perhaps you did. Caius had said at least four times that your behaviour wasn’t natural. In the end, they had already drawn their conclusions about you. The Cullen’s were never so blunt. Sure, you were a little different but they welcomed that. After all, they were different too because of their diet. Although you could still see the flicker in their eyes of slight confusion. At least they had the decency to try and hide it. 

Much to your surprise, you had spent much more time with Alec. You would have called him a friend but you weren’t too sure if he’d say the same. He still had his own judgements but he didn’t avoid your company. In your eyes, knowing Alec, that was progress. 

The comments had begun to wear you down and that became evident. You weren’t as lively and cheerful. You had begun to seek out solitude, to the extent that Alec would seek you out for company rather than vice versa. That is when you didn’t talk as much, always saying enough for a decent answer but never going further. You spent more times out doors.  “Something’s wrong.” Rosalie said, watching you sit with Renesmee. She was full of life and, usually, so would you. Not this time. Instead you sat on the ground, not even cracking a smile. Carlisle stood behind Rosalie, his arms crossed and concern etched across his face.  He said nothing as he left the house, approaching the two of you.  “Renesmee, might I speak with (Y/N) alone for a moment?” Carlisle asked. Renesmee nodded with a smile before running inside. Carlisle sat beside you, his back against the tree beside you. “You have us a little worried, (Y/N). Is there anything I can help with?” Carlisle didn’t need three guesses to know what had bothered you. However he thought it important that you said it for yourself. You didn’t look at Carlisle, your eyes falling to your lap. 

After a moment of silence, he spoke up. “Have i ever told you that before I had a coven, I stayed with the Volturi for a decade...on the animal blood diet.” This got your attention, making you look up at Carlisle. He nodded in confirmation. “I was the only one they knew of with such a diet and they didn’t understand it. Aro and Caius tried to change me, bring me to feed on human blood but at the end of the day, it isn’t what I wanted and eventually they grew to respect that. So i know what it’s like for those to be unsatisfied with who you are, to not fulfill expectations. Although I also know that words come and go and you don’t have to change for anyone.“  “Did it get easier?” Carlisle hummed. “It took a long time but i found people who accepted me. Not to mention finding the one who loved me the most of all.”  “What did you do then?” You asked. Carlisle smiled. “I made them my family and i married the one who loved me the most.” You cracked a small smile at the mention of the Cullen’s and Denali. It faltered as something took over your mind and Carlisle’s gaze narrowed slightly, noticing the shift.  “I feel like a freak.” You whispered. “I’m tired of constantly maintaining appearances, all the while everyone is looking at me. I used to be able to ignore it, think of myself as the lucky one who didn’t have to be this monster that newborns are described to be...but now i can’t even do that.” Carlisle listened as you continued. “Everyone’s afraid of me. I see the look everyone gives me. It makes me afraid of me too.”  “(Y/N), you are a wonderful person and no one is afraid of you. You have given us no reason to be-”  “-but that's what is wanted, for me to be that monster everyone is so afraid of. As though that's what is best for the world.” You interrupted. “It makes me sad, but it’s also starting to make me angry.”  “They’ll be leaving soon, just endure. I promise, no one can hurt you. Not unless you let them. When they’re gone, you and I could go on a trip, whatever you like.” You nodded slowly in response. “Maybe.” You said quietly. 

 The Volturi left two days later. You had gotten many comments in that time. However, you had most certainly gained a friend by the end of the visit. After that, the Cullen's left for a hunt. You chose to stay behind. You weren't hungry. It wasn't a lie. Although they returned the next morning to find you gone without even so much as a note. After a lot of discussion within the coven, Carlisle insisted that the Cullen's left you alone and that you would be back. Edward returned after all.

'This world will eat you whole. This world will eat you whole!' You didn't remember why that sentence stuck to you like glue but it never left you. Never had it felt more applicable and ironic. You were on the top of the food chain. Yet you didn't feel like it. You felt as though you were drowning in the world, at the very bottom. You had no clue how long you had been walking. Although you also didn't care, a dark numb sensation flooding through your body. 

Three months had passed and you hadn't so much had made a call. Eventually the Cullen's contacted the Volturi to inform them that (Y/N) had been gone for a long time. The Volturi offered Demetri's services but Carlisle refused the offer, maintaining you'd return upon your own accord. Although he thought it right to inform the Volturi for Alec seeing as the two of you had developed a friendship. 

“Why do people do that?” Esme said to Carlisle. The light breeze brushing the hair from her face, revealing her coal black eyes.  “Do what?” Carlisle asked softly.  “Try to change people they don’t understand.” She answered.  “Some require it. There are dangerous people in the world, Esme.”  “(Y/N) wasn’t one of them.” Esme responded.  “You’re right.” Carlisle responded. “There are many who don’t need to be changed. It’s simply down to the fear of the unknown. Our kind didn’t understand (Y/N) so the first impulse is to try and change them.”  “It’s horrible.” Esme said quietly.  “They’ll come back, Esme. They aren’t the type to just disappear from off the face of the earth. They just need some time.”  “I tried so hard to make sure they knew they were loved. It wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.” Carlisle took Esme’s hand and kissed it gently. “You’re too good for this world sometimes, my love.” Carlisle said softly with a smile.  

The rain poured down, soaking your clothes and skin. It was nightfall, but you could still differentiate the dark, large clouds smothering the sky. You must have looked odd, walking in the outing rain without even a jacket. Although you didn't feel the cold. It didn't bite at you like it had when you were human. As a matter of fact, you barely felt it. The town around you went unnoticed by you. However you didn't go unnoticed. 

"(Y/N)!?" A female voice called out and you slowed to a stop. Slowly your turned your head towards the voice. "Get in! You'll freeze out here!" It was Angela Weber. You had seen her around a couple of times. Although you were 'home schooled', so those times were usually indirect encounters with someone else. You could hear her heart beat quicken, worry etched across her face. Without protest or even a twitch, you crossed the street and into the car. 

"What are you doing out here!? Did you just get caught in the rain!?" You didn't respond, staring ahead through the windshield although you raised her shoulders up and down as though you were breathing. "I'll take you back to the hotel, you'll freeze out there with that." She nodded to your clothing before driving. "What are you doing here?" You asked quietly. "I've been looking at universities out with Forks. The one I'm in, doesn't really fit me. So I've taken the opportunity to get some travel in whilst I've been looking. What about you?" She asked. "What brings you all the way out here. Is Dr Cullen with you too?" Slowly you shook your head, but didn't give her an answer as to why you were there. Whilst she looked concerned, she didn't press the issue. You knew Angela well enough to know that she was thinking the worst, that something could have it has happened to you. It was sweet of her but unnecessary. 

She led you to her hotel room. "You can take a shower and...if you give me your clothes, I can put them on the radiator to dry off. I have a hoodie and some pajamas that you can borrow." You nodded, heading into the bathroom. You did as she said, not because you needed or would benefit from it, but because you were watching her like a hawk eyed it's prey. You let her be comfortable and do things of her own accord almost like she'd forget you were ever there. 

Whilst you were in the shower, Angela popped her head around the door, not looking at you and gathering your clothes. "I'm just getting these." She said, bundling your soaked clothes into her arms and promptly closing the door. She returned seconds later to drop off a towel and the clothes she'd let you borrow. You were quiet, quieter than Angela remembered. It had crossed her mind to call someone but decided against it. She could handle this. Perhaps you needed the shower and a good night's sleep. Then the two of you could figure out what to do for you in the morning. It required patience to hang all of your clothes on such a small radiator but it was manageable. Your clothes were freezing to the touch and soaked. So much so Angela wasn't even sure if they'd be dry by morning and she had no doubt they were uncomfortable in such a condition. However she would still try. It was a cheaper option to have a hotel room with one bed and one bathroom. She was provided a small TV plugged in, on top of the drawers. Although it wasn't so beneficial now that there were two of you. She turned on the TV simply to break the silence, casting a glance the the pouring rain gliding down the small window above the radiator. 

After ten minutes, you emerged in the hoodie and shorts she had provided. She offered you a small smile and you returned it. "Do you mind if we share the bed? I didn't anticipate two of us." Angela smiled meekly. "It's a double bed, so it shouldn’t be a bother." You responded somewhat quietly. "Good." She nodded. 

After some time, Angela was lying on top of the bed, typing on her laptop. Whilst you had been mesmerized by the pixels on the TV. The TV was so cheap and looked to be slightly older in make that you, with heightened eyesight could see every flickering colourful pixel. Much like what you would have seen when pressed your face close to the TV before your mother scolded you for being too close. It was some comedy late night show with a man how looked to be in his sixties. You couldn't remember who he was but supposedly he was popular. He had the audience roaring with laughter but you watched blankly, as though not in on the joke. You were watching it but not necessarily listening. "Hey, I was thinking." Angela began. You turned as she gained your attention. "I left out that sweater over there for you. I noticed you don't have a jacket and whilst it's not much, I figured it's an extra layer until you get a new one." You followed her pointed gaze to a green sweater that looked to be thin, had a zip and a hood. "Thank you." You whispered. "It's not a problem but...can I ask you something?" You nodded. "Are you okay?" "I'm fine." You responded passively. "You're sure? I was worried something had happened." You shook your head in response. "Nothing happened. I just got caught in the rain and hadn't brought a jacket." 

After an hour or two it was 'bed time'. You made sure to keep a distance from Angela, so she couldn’t feel how cold your body was. The only sound made was Angela's breathing except the slight buzz of the TV that would have been barely audible to a human from such a distance. You had rolled onto your side, facing her, once you knew she was asleep. 

She lay on her back, glasses at her bedside table and arms on her stomach. You stared at her for quite some time, feeling the build up of venom in your mouth and the urge to feed steadily grow. She wore a tank top that night leaving no barrier and complete access to her throat  Slowly you sat up. You contemplated it, it hadn't been the first time as of late. Although the thought didn't bring you any excitement. Human blood still wasn't tempting enough to let go. Besides, you had already fed before arriving in the town. Whilst Angela had always been nice to you, her friends weren't so accommodating. They were reclusive and much like people their age, couldn't help but judge your odd behaviour. You were a Cullen after all, but you were the Cullen that wasn't seen, the home schooled one. The only reason they even knew what you had looked like was because Alice and Bella bumped into Jessica, Angela, Mike and Ben whilst out and your gold eyes were a big hint. Whilst Angela had her moments of kindness, it didn't change that she was mostly a follower of Jessica. She enabled any of Jessica's comments, with a light chastise that always went ignored.  Your reached over, your hand inches away from curling around Jessica's throat, staring at her intently. You pulled back, hands resting upon your knees. 

Angela woke up after sleeping well, much to her surprise. How her day had went, often impacted her sleep that night and she didn't have high hopes after seeing you in such a bizarre state. She rolled over, thinking you'd be beside her...but you weren't. She sat up and you were nowhere to be seen. Your clothes on the radiator gone as well as the green sweater. Folded neatly was her hoodie and shorts she had let you borrow. She reached over for her glasses and phone to check the time. It was nine thirty in the morning. She unlocked her phone to see an unsent message to Ben. One she hadn't remembered writing. 'Thank you :)' 

"Weeks have passed and they still haven't returned?" Alec asked looking over to Demetri who shook his head. "They'll be fine." Jane told her brother nonchalantly. "What else do you expect from a newborn other than to go rogue?" "You heard how they were feeling when we were there." Alec countered. "I can't pretend this is a newborn with a change of heart about their priorities. It's not like them to do this." "You barely know them." Felix said flatly, making Alec glare at him. "I know them well enough to know something isn't right." "It isn't important Alec and until they make a mistake, it isn't our business." Jane responded. "We made it our business when we decided they weren't like us." Alec argued back. "So what do you want to do? Go after them?" Jane asked in annoyance. "No." Alec said sharply. "Then why do you care? They're barely your friend, Alec." "Well, well, well, look who it is." You stopped when you heard the male voice. You were aware of a presence, two of them as two scents hit your nostrils but you didn't think they'd approach. Of course, your suspicions were confirmed by the accent. You turned to be face to face with Vladimir and Stefan, the two remaining members of the Romanian coven. 

You didn't bother mustering a greeting, no longer seeing why you should give anyone anything if they were simply going to use it at your expense. "Carlisle's youngest has wandered off." Vladimir smirked. "Wandered very far to be here, of all places." Stefan agreed. "This is our territory and it's rude to show up uninvited." Vladimir said. You stuffed your hands in the pockets of your green sweater. "Hm? Nothing to say? Not even as much as a 'hello'?" Stefan tilted his head. You stared at the two blankly as they continued. "Not even so much as a smile. “My, my, that's a first." Stefan smirked. Vladimir hummed in amusement. 

The two moved closer to you and you did nothing. Vladimir scoffed, nudging his fingers forcefully against the side of your head. "Absolutely pointless for a newborn." He said to himself. "You'd have attacked the moment you caught onto us if you were anything like a newborn." Stefan said with a sigh of disappointment. "It's a waste of power really." Vladimir agreed. "Now where is that little newborn who was always so happy as we insulted them? Where has that pretty smile gone?" Stefan grinned. "I don't need to do anything for your entertainment." You responded. Apparently they didn't like that answer as Vladimir roughly grabbed your face. "That's because you're laughable by your existence alone." Vladimir seethed threw you to the ground. "You're embarrassing to our kind. Consider yourself nothing less." You had begun to feel anger bubble within you at the out of your stomach but you swallowed it down, an ability most newborns didn't have and almost everyone took advantage of. You looked up at Vladimir from the forest ground with a soft glare. 

Eleazar was following a brown bear, careful not to be noticed, careful not to startle it in anyway with any sudden noises. His hunting ability as a vampire allowed him to stalk his prey with ease.  Although to Eleazar's surprise, he wasn't the only one hunting this bear. 

He locked eyes with you and he was almost horrified. You were dirty, your clothes covered in dirt and your green sweater falling off of one shoulder slightly. You had your eyes focused on Eleazar and he knew you had left the Cullen's suddenly. Although he didn't think you'd end up in Alaska. Your eyes were black and he heard you stifle a quiet groan within your stomach as an arm wrapped around your stomach. There was no doubt in Eleazar's mind you were hungry. However something told him there was something worse going on with you. You had lost your smile, your eyes empty. You looked unharmed yet you resembled nothing of the newborn he had met months ago. He knew about you just as almost everyone else did. Your behaviour, he had never seen before but he mostly kept any comment of that to himself. He knew how gentle and delicate you could be. The (Y/N) he knew couldn't hurt anyone. 

However the (Y/N) that stood before him was very different as shown when your lips pulled back as you barred your teeth with a low growl. Something told Eleazar to let you take the bear. Although he couldn't figure out why that feeling crept up on him. Perhaps it had been the shock of hearing you growl as he slowly raised his hands and backed off. He had never heard you growl and from Carlisle's account, you rarely did. It happened barely two times in your whole, now, 9 and a half months of this life. He couldn't help but be fearful of the newborn before him, fearful of you than he had ever been. You took off after the bear, leaving Eleazar behind. 

As the tenth month rolled around, another trial was being held. However, the Cullen's had decided enough was enough and the coven went to the Volturi for help to find you. There they ended up having to witness the demise of the nomadic vampire. 

He was around eighteen and didn't care for the laws. This made him a reckless feeder. Give him enough time and he'd have the humans attention soon enough. As expected he didn't come quietly and fought back with every step of the way. What made him more of a threat is that he was in his newborn year. Therefore he still had the strength to his advantage. He created more fuss than he was worth, only controlled properly when retrained by both Felix and Demetri as well as Jane using her gift for good measure. 

What wasn't expected was you bursting through the throne room doors. You wasted no time, lunging towards the nomad and a full blown fight ensued. The two newborns snarled and growled with fury that would remind anyone of an animal. Both the Volturi and the Cullen's were stunned and unable to move. Your outfit you had left in was covered in dirt. You wore a green sweater that was unfamiliar and your hair was messy. You were almost unrecognisable to the two covens in behaviour.  You suddenly gained the advantage, getting the newborn to the floor underneath you. Which animalistic screeching you tore at him, his head gone but you weren't done, tearing into his body with an unsolicited rage that only newborns had. 

Felix was first to step forward and you immediately turned to him with a snarl, as though protecting your territory. "(Y/N)?" Alec called out softly. Your head turned to him, still in a crouched position. It was you, there was no doubt but you didn't act like yourself. Suddenly your face twitched, a grimace. Then you kept your eye on everyone in the room. "Have you been harmed?" Carlisle asked softly. You didn't respond, continuing to eye each person warily. "(Y/N)?" Alec said again. It was all he could manage out. You turned to Alec again, this time locking eyes with him. Your gold eyes meeting his red ones. "Where have you been?" Alec asked quietly, questions finally beginning to return to him. Immediately you curled into yourself slightly. "They're hungry." Felix stated. That was when the receptionist entered the room. 

"I-I tried to inform you sooner but I-" It was all she got to manage out before you lunged at her. Your teeth but down with a vice grip and she screamed in pain and terror. You threw her to the ground without breaking away, biting even harder. She screamed more as you moved your head quickly, trying to get more blood. It was torture at the very least but both covens knew better than to even attempt to stop you. They could only look down in horror at what you had become. All remembering that this would have been your first taste of human blood. 

Even after the receptionist was dead, you sucked her dry for every little drop, so much so that the silence made the sight last longer than it should. You finally pulled your face away, mouth covered in blood. You turned to look at the Volturi and the Cullen's, grinning with bloodied teeth. The question you asked was quiet but chilling. "Isn't this what you wanted?"

[marryat92]

Sometimes I think of Frederick Marryat as being the most famous writer that no one has ever heard of.

His idioms have entered the English language: “It’s just six of one and half-a-dozen of the other” (from The Pirate) and “like a bull in a chinashop” (from Jacob Faithful). But almost no one knows his name.

An incident from Marryat’s Diary in America has made it to popular myth status, although the source is largely unknown: the idea that Victorians put clothing on furniture for modesty’s sake, and would be scandalized by bare legs on furniture as if they were unclothed female legs. I witnessed this in real time when a Facebook page I follow shared pictures of what looks like furniture in dresses and flowing gowns:

There’s a story behind these myths, and it has everything to do with Captain Marryat.

After some general remarks in Diary in America on the prudishness of Americans, who object to nude classical statues and will use an “absurd substitute” for an indelicate word, Marryat tells the tale of a young lady he has befriended on his travels in America, and her opinions on modesty and proper language.

When at Niagara Falls I was escorting a young lady with whom I was on friendly terms. She had been standing on a piece of rock, the better to view the scene, when she slipped down, and was evidently hurt by the fall: she had, in fact, grazed her shin. As she limped a little in walking home, I said, “Did you hurt your leg much?” She turned from me, evidently much shocked, or much offended,—and not being aware that I had committed any very heinous offence, I begged to know what was the reason of her displeasure. After some hesitation, she said that as she knew me well, she would tell me that the word leg was never mentioned before ladies. I apologised for my want of refinement, which was attributable to having been accustomed only to English society; and added, that as such articles must occasionally be referred to, even in the most polite circles in America, perhaps she would inform me by what name I might mention them without shocking the company. Her reply was, that the word limb was used; “nay,” continued she, “I am not so particular as some people are, for I know those who always say limb of a table, or limb of a piano-forte.”

There the conversation dropped; but a few months afterwards I was obliged to acknowledge that the young lady was correct when she asserted that some people were more particular than even she was.

I was requested by a lady to escort her to a seminary for young ladies, and on being ushered into the reception-room, conceive my astonishment at beholding a square piano-forte with four limbs. However, that the ladies who visited their daughters might feel in its full force the extreme delicacy of the mistress of the establishment, and her care to preserve in their utmost purity the ideas of the young ladies under her charge, she had dressed all these four limbs in modest little trousers, with frills at the bottom of them!

— Frederick Marryat, A Diary in America

So there you have it: the original frilly modesty pants for piano legs. This is a nonfiction travelogue, and 1830s American purity culture evidently called for clothing on furniture, at least in a few homes, according to Captain Marryat. It’s also funny that the story has morphed into a roast of “Victorians” in many people’s minds, since it’s mocking Americans specifically. (There was one other person in the comments section directing people to Frederick Marryat — God bless you, rare person who gets the reference and who knows who Marryat is!) 

I remember hearing a garbled version of this story growing up, from my historian mother who loved to make fun of prudes. She repeated that it was Americans who needed modesty garments on inanimate objects, and that foreign observers found this ridiculous; she even included the bit about “limb” being a polite euphemism for leg. But somehow Marryat’s name and role as storyteller was omitted. 

In the screen capture above, it’s amazing that one person, apparently unaware of Frederick Marryat, has echoed his language about trousers on piano legs very closely. The absurdity of this claim is memorable. 

[firebirdsdaughter]

Heh heh, whoops…

… Realised I forgot to do a Ryusoulger Raw post.

So… Y’all get to hear my initial reactions to the subbed version! Yay! XD

Let’s a-go!

In no particular order and w/ many typos:

Naohisa peeling the banana for Ui bc she’s so busy staring. XD Ui, I know Asuna is beautiful, and the boys, too, but please remember to eat?

Well, that’s either really convenient, or Naohisa knows more than he’s letting on. This is Sentai. It could be either.

Aw, poor Melto. Come here, I’ll give you a hug. ^^ Sometimes I’m a good mother.

I think I already waxed about why I love the way Banba immediately, like, flies to this guy’s side in the tags of Ryuu’s gifset, but it still holds. Believes he can’t trust people and that kindness is weakness, but still can’t stop himself. I am really hoping for an episode/something way down the line where he has a ‘I would have turned into a monster w/out Touwa and the rest of you’ moment. Might just write one myself, eventually. ^^

And the coincidence, one of the true heroes of Toku, saving the day is also still hilarious. Like, if Banba had been one block over.

Why was he even on this street to begin w/?

Why is Touwa here? I find it hard to believe Banba would at all be interested.

No, actually, I know why. Bc plot.

Aw, he came bc he loves you two and is constantly anxious. Melto is absolutely the type of person who is afraid to let the people he loves out of his sight bc what if they didn’t look both ways before crossing the street and got hit by a truck???? And I doubt Biker Dad’s death helped that at all. Kou and Asuna are all he’s got left of his ‘family’ and he’s secretly terrified of losing them, too. Hey, Melto, I think I just got an idea for an angst tidbit for you, and I’m really sorry.

Aaaaand the youngest brothers are at it again. XD Dorks.

My ‘age’ order for this family is Naohisa, Banba, Melto, Asuna, Kou, Touwa and Ui. Age in quotes bc obviously the canon ages are completely wild. But I think I’ve done the fam break down before, so I won’t go into it again. ^^

I mean, gotta hand it to Wyzul. It’s a situation where acting blatantly weird and out of place works. Like, it’s a legit acting job. People in special events/games. Ren fairs. Yes, he’s acting really evil and suspicious, but that’s easily explainable as that being the character. Another pretty good plan. Very Sentai, but actually a good plan.

OH GOD NO! IT’S A MIMIC! DX

I don’t actually play Dark Souls, but…

Okay, but I wouldn’t be getting too comfy, yet. You’re missing one, and he happens to be the most stab-happy out of all of them. Like, I’m sorry, but as a villain, I would be celebrating while Banba was unaccounted for. I’d be checking the back stairwell.

This confirms that the chibis are merely going in colour order and have no bearing on the focus character.

Mother¡Melto makes another appearance, in a small way. ^^

I don’t know, Asuna. Given that none of you remember how you got here, I think it’s very valid of Melto to fear this was a Druidon trap.

Kou takes a moment to look majestic. XD HAve you been taking lessons from Banba? ^^

This is so obviously suspicious. Like. It’s obviously magic. Touwa and Asuna win the doofus award this ep. At least Kou figured it out eventually.

Touwa is the super winner of the award, though. Asuna had the sense to snap to it when told there were Druidon. XD

Honestly, she probably needs the protein and calories. Her super strength might mean she burns through energy faster than other people.

Actually, I dunno if that makes sense.

Mother¡Melto again. XD ‘Don’t eat mystery meat!’ is kind of like he’s telling her not to take food from strangers…

Yup, Touwa’s a dumb. ^^ I love how in the character blog, Yuito was like ‘he would have gotten scolded if his brother was there.’ XD Probably one of the reasons they didn’t want Banba in Wonderland w/ them. A) he would have snapped Touwa out of it too soon, and B) given how the chests open in their own, they didn’t want to reveal too much about his past, I guess? Though I wish they would tell us at least a little more. Keep it slow, absolutely, but I’m hoping for some more concrete hints soon.

A for effort, Melto. You tried.

Also, oh, Kou. ^^ Cutie. So it is limited—bc they had to stay trapped in the ‘box,’ it couldn’t actually grant Kou’s wish. But it sure tried. Kinda like w/ that Yummy that was destroying people’s dreams when it tried to attack Eiji, and the world came out of his mind.

Aw, he’s fine. The boy is durable. ^^

Kou, now is the time when you assume this is not the real world, you dork. XD

Aw, did Banba help clean up? Actually, there’s no indication if he did or not, but it’s sweet to think he did. ^^

I mean, he’s got a point. It could have a backlash. My recommendation would be to poke it first. Though since Kou crashed into it before, it’d probably just be impervious…

Oh, don’t remind him of that, that was (obviously unintentionally) kinda insensitive of her… Well, it did say that she sometimes has a habit of saying the wrong thing/speaking so bluntly she has trouble communicating… We haven’t really seen that yet, but I think it’s kind of coming into play here, since Melto’s bio, and this ep, establish that Melto is self conscious and doubts himself in comparison to the others… So that probably hurt him a lot  more than she intended it too.

But bc he’s Melto, he didn’t communicate that, so she had no way of knowing and no chance to reassure him she didn’t mean it that way.

God, Banba’s got a compulsive apologising streak, Melto has an inferiority complex, neither likes admitting hurt/weakness, esp to people they care about… And then there’s Asuna being too blunt and saying thing w/out thinking, Kou and Touwa are probably in the ‘bottle things up’ boat, too, just of the Stepford Smiler/Snarker variety… Any more of my quirks you’d like to spread out amongst the team, Toei? Like, maybe Gold is constantly terrified he’s bothering everyone?

Sorry (exhibit A XD) that got a little nonsensical. Right now it’s mainly Banba, Melto, and Asuna who are exhibiting some of my habits (apologising [for ex. rather than thanking someone], a slight inferiority complex compared to more “successful” friends, an in ability to read social cues and saying things w/out thinking).

And I love them for it. DX Really gotta write more Melto now!

Aaaaaaaaand… Now I’m crying all over again. DX I mean, hi Biker Dad and all, but poor Melto… TT^TT

This poor baby… DX Like, you can tell that for a fraction of a second, he’s almost like ‘oh my god, you’re alive?!?!?’ And… Then the memory hits him. DX

And then he promptly logics himself out to ‘I’m hallucinating.’ Oh, baby… DX

I know it would’ve broken the illusion, but… I wish Melto could’ve hugged him. Let the boy hug his Biker Dad. DX

Or, if not, can someone please hug someone??? Please?!?!?

Aw, he’s scared, though. I mean, I totally think he was the anxious, ‘oh my god what if I turn around for a moment and they fall of a cliff?!?’ sort of person before, but losing their Masters magnified that. He loves them so much he was afraid of something happening to them before, but now that something terrible has happened to someone else he loves, it’s even worse.

Basically, he was already terrified of something bad happening to the people he loved, and then something did, validating that terror.

Inferiority complex probably didn’t help. It’s not exactly resentment toward people perceived as ‘better’ (though there is some in it), but feels like a failure on the part of the one w/ the complex for not being ‘good enough’ or able to ‘catch up.’ He knew they were good at fighting, but was terrified by their recklessness and feared he might not be strong enough to help them one day, or something. Not sure any of that made sense.

I do like the idea of Biker Dad inside the Blue RyuSoul just being like, ‘oh no, Melto is worrying himself into a corner, maybe it will help if I astral project and give him a pep talk.’ Might be cute if the Masters’ souls are still semi ‘present’ or ‘aware’ in the RyuSouls.

…

… Ooooooo. I just got an idea. Kinda like in that Magiranger episode. Like, the trio get trapped in some ‘magical dimension’ or something again, and, like, the Masters are somehow there, or their souls come out of the RyuSouls somehow… Anyway, could have something like when… Houka, I think it was, didn’t want to leave that place bc it seemed like their mother was there. Could also include friendship bc maybe the final straw for them finding the will to go isn’t just ‘we need to protect the world’ but also, on a more personal level, the Tatsuis and the brothers? Like, if they realise that the boys are getting overwhelmed in the real world, esp if the brothers are partially fighting to try and rescue them, and are about to get defeated, and meanwhile Ui’s in the line of fire bc she’s trying to help civilians and doing everything she can, too… Could be cute. And heartbreaking.

That was a bad explanation, I’ll try to be more concise later.

Why… Is he explaining this?

Again. I wouldn’t be celebrating while mister handsome murder boy the Majestic Knight is still at large.

I like how it’s still saying ‘here, here.’

Wow, Melto can jump!

Oooo. They came out of the fire! Cool effect.

I’d question how Biker Dad knows this, but he’s dead, so maybe he’s omniscient now. I dunno. I’m inclined to give more leeway to people knowing weird things if they’re dead. Bc they’re no longer tied to this plane, ya know?

Anyway.

…

……

……… Butt. DX

AAAAH! DX Poor baby. He’s all like ‘I did it, dad!’ and briefly forgets that it was an vision, and then of course Biker Dad is gone, and it… TT^TT

Ah, yes. The perfect way to get me to stop crying. Cut directly from sad, introspective Melto to Banba tenderly caressing the lid of some random box. XD

Now, I will not grow out of that joke. XP Ryusoulger here, making me jealous of inanimate objects like pros.

Must everything he does be so very attractive? And by that I mean sexy? But for some reason I am very self-conscious about that word???

Touwa still wins the super doof award.

And now, Melto does math. I think.

XD Kou’s crash into the dome was useful! Though I’m impressed Melto could have any estimation of what the height of that was. ^^

I really like the little collars of the suits. I really do.

AH. I FIGURED IT OUT. THE LITTLE ‘LIFE BLOBS’ ARE SUPPOSED TO REPRESENT THE MINUSAUR!

(pictures at the bottom)

CUTE.

XD Using the Minusaur’s power against it. ^^ Nice going Melto.

I guess it’s not technically him piloting alone—though he does seem to be the one in control…

XD Wyzul and Crayon’s reactions are so funny. ^^

Touwa just lying on the grou w/ his arms folded is still funny.

Banba just… Freaking teleports behind Kou. How did he even find them? Did he walk down the street carrying the box while fully transformed? XD

Banba interrogating the mooks is hilarious bc, esp in most recent years, they can’t actually talk. The most recent exception I can think of is Kyuranger’s mooks.

XD The absolutely unnecessarily fancy sword twirling he does just to point it in the other direction. <3

I mean, I guess it might seem a little silly, but… Isn’t there a belief in Shinto that all things have souls, even inanimate objects? So… Not so far afield, really. Though that does kinda make it sadder that Banba just smashed it. DX Requiescat in pace, antique miniature garden box. Thank you for your sacrifice.

Most easily defeated Mimic. Ever.

Asuna and Kou are either staring into my soul, or thinking about how cool Banba is, and I find both to be valid.

Touwa, don’t be mean. DX Ah, dorks.

This scene is really cute. Y’all here turning into a family w/out noticing, between the younger sibs teasing Melto and then goofing off among themselves, Banba just walking behind them like a tired babysitter and even shooting a look at Melto like he’s trying to make sure Blue’s still w/ them… Cuties.

Also, Touwa bouncing. ^^ <3

The soft piano version of the theme song definitely helps, too. ^^

That hug is still available if you want it, Melto.

And yes, I’d like to think it was. ^^

Still wondering what was up w/ that hooded person. They’re in the opening. They can’t just forget they exist! What happened in the rest of that secene w/ the brothers? Not even Touwa has mentioned it. Did they get their memories of the encounter wiped? Or is there something more?

Preview:

I like the opening shot of Asuna playing a carnival game while the boys watch. Like, it’s so cute and family-y. Melto’s so excited for her like a proud mom and Kou seems to trying to perfect his strategy. XD

Asuna once again finds herself talking people out of… That.

At this point, I don’t care how short that Banba sulking scene is or how little it relates to the plot. I just want to see it. ^^

That’s all, folks! Virtual mochi for anyone who read all that! I really liked this episode, and I’m glad for Melto getting a chance to be very heartbreaking, too. Next episode is an Asuna ep, and while I’m a little cagey about it bc of the short summary we saw at first, I’m willing to give the show the benefit of the doubt and not jump to conclusions about how they’re going to handle it. Hoping we’ll see Anky Mom, too, though there haven’t been any shots of her in the previews… Well, it wouldn’t make much sense if they didn’t eventually bring her back in some way. Still hoping for more concrete info about the brothers’, and specifically Banba’s past. Not all at once, but you could slowly start giving us more. Though it’s not that pressing, and is mainly bc I’m an impatient baby—they’ve got time to do it. And then there’s mysterious hooded person who is in the opening. Gaisoulg? Master Gold? Probably too old to be Gold, but who knows. It does seems strange that not even Touwa, the more friendly of the two, has brought it up to the trio. You’d assume he’d mention ‘oh, yeah, mysterious cloaked man came and sought us out and [something something]’ Makes me very suspicious of cloaked man. Did he wipe their memories? Threaten them? Just plan ask them to keep him a secret? Is he friend of foe? Is he Naohisa? Who knows. But I’d like some clues. At some point.

Lastly, the screenshots I promised, of the life blobs, and the thing everyone else probably already noticed:

[papilonblanche]

Prompts-05.08.2019

Prompt 5: ,, Please remain calm and stay indoors."

Why? Just why? Why did I let this happen in the first place? It s too late to apologise now...

Ok, let me explain myself. I m a scientist and as you can probably tell, one of my experiments... well, went berserk. It was meant to be an invention that would help clear the sky of all the acid clouds that formed after years and years of pollution. What I didn t expected was that the gaz I invented somehow mutated the already radioactive particles of the clouds, thus bringing to earth a special kind of acidic rain that managed to contaminate half of the population on earth, including plants, animals and destroying inanimated objects such as cars and wood and basically anything organic. So now we have to deal with shortages of potable water, food and having to fight zombie like creatures that can infect everything around them.

It s kinda funny, on one of ours battles a radio could be heard faint in the distance. " Please remain calm and stay indoors" my ass. 'The world won t save itself' , I throught as everything around me went suddenly black and I was knocked out cold...

[iwritethat]

Damian Wayne as a Father Headcanons

A/N: Reader and Damian are adults in these. I went all out on this, so I really hope you like the structure and everything. Feedback is welcomed. ☺️

(c/n) = child’s name

>>>>——————–>

Damian as a father would include:

Pregnancy: • Damian was excited when you told him he was going to be a father, well as excited as Damian manages to express.

• He had his concerns about whether he was going to be a good father, based on his family background and upbringing he had his doubts. However after reassuring him, that he managed to change and has become a better person his worry subsided.

• Now when he goes out on patrol, he’s more cautious and careful as he now has two people to come home to and protect.

• Whilst you’re pregnant, Damian is extremely over protective with everything. You are not putting yourself in any danger and he’ll make sure of that. He understands he’s being this way and apologised, explaining he doesn’t want either of you hurt since you’re a prime target now.

• Catering to your cravings the best he can. Sort of. “Pennyworth, we need some strawberries and hot sauce?” “We’re currently out of strawberries Master Damian, Miss (Y/n) has cleared them out.” “Ugh, I’ll be back shortly beloved.” “Really? You have to leave me, I know you’re getting stuff for me but I’m kind of annoyed by that and I don’t know why.” “Hormones (y/n).”

• Trying to comfort you when you get emotional, but since Damian isn’t the best at it he comes up with other solutions. “I could punch you right now!” “Beloved, that’d be a stupid move.” “Oh really? Because I love you… a lot and I didn’t mean that!” You were still yelling and you weren’t sure why. “How about throwing some knives instead?” “What?! NO! That’s ridiculous and I’m actually willing to do it. You’re such a good partner for letting me do this.” By your last statement you were crying and pulling him into an embrace.

• Both of you low-key freaking out when the baby kicks and you’re just hugging each other with massive grins on your faces.

• Receiving visits from Damian’s family, all of which are super excited to be apart of it and looking forward to having a new member in the family.

• Dick encouraging Damian that’s he’s going to be a good father.

• Bruce still not quite getting the fact his son has a proper family that’s almost normal, but enjoys it none the less. “Bruce, you know you’re going to be a granddad right?” “Yes of course I do (y/n), Damian is going to be a father and to be honest… it all feels surreal.” “Tell me about it. It’s gonna be great though.” “It truly is.”

Labour: • When your waters broke, Damian was with you since he’d estimated the most likely time it’d happen. This man was prepared, he was still the son of the original Batman.

• Damian drove you to the hospital as soon as possible, not in the Batmobile much to your disappointment but understood there’d be no easy way to explain that.

• Panicking and being exhausted throughout labour and Damian telling you to breathe.

• “Holy shit (y/n)!!!” Damian actually yelped when you squeezed his hand during labour. “You’re not giving birth Dami!” “You’re a lot stronger than I thought.” “Yep, comes with being your significant other for so long! Ah shit!” “Breathe beloved, breathe.”

• With over 10 hours in labour you finally had your child and you were exhausted. “I did it - Dami I -” “I know beloved, you are so strong. I’m proud of you (y/n), I love you so much.” “Love you too.”

• Holding the baby and you simply can’t believe you’ve created something so pure, suddenly you forget all the pain because it was all worth it for this child in your arms.

• Damian holds them next, and is so smitten that you know this child is gonna be spoilt. He almost cried because he thought he was incapable of producing something this innocent, his family do not have a grip on his baby and they never will.

• The rest of the Batfam piling in minutes later hoping to see their new addition. Dick is super enthusiastic about the whole ordeal and sheds a few tears, whilst promising to be the best uncle ever which was open to dispute. Jason was smiling more than ever, saying “It’s up to (y/n) to make sure we don’t get another demon spawn in the family. Right now though, I’m really proud of you two.” Tim making sure you’re alright, asking about names and how much the baby weighs before checking on the others. Bruce is over the moon and is third to hold his grandchild, he’s quick to congratulate you both and offers for you to stay at the manor so they can all help to get you back on your feet. Cassandra doesn’t say anything, instead hugging you tightly with a wide grin on her face then patting Damian on the shoulder who remained by your bedside. “You’ll make a great auntie Cass.” And that only made her smile more.

General Child Raising: > Taking turns to get up in the night when the baby wakes up.

• Morning cuddles because you’re both exhausted.

• The baby getting lots of attention and babysitters consisting of Damian’s family which you’re eternally grateful for.

• Damian still being smitten as you expected, you find yourself leaning on the doorframe and watching the two interact often, a smile making its way onto your face. “Are you alright beloved?” “Y-yeah, it’s nice to be apart of this family.” You soon join the two.

• Damian teaching your child self defence from a young age and you’re not too thrilled with the idea. “Oh my - Damian! Why does (c/n) have a katana?!” “I’m teaching (c/n) how to wield the weapon beloved.” “Y-yeah, couldn’t you have started with a wooden one. A real one isn’t exactly safe for a 5 year old!” “I did. At the age of 3. (C/n)’s skills have developed since then (y/n).” “Oh my gosh. We’re terrible parents!” You yelped, throwing your hands in the air.

• Your child learning about Damian’s culture and heritage as well as your own so they know where to come from and if they want to celebrate any traditions.

• Both of you helping out with homework from school, Damian specialising in Maths.

• Having to come up with crazy explanations as to why their father came through the window in the dead of night looking like Batman. “Is daddy Santa?” “Uh not exactly… It’s more like the tooth fairy?” “We are not saying that beloved, (c/n) I’m Batman - but you can’t tell anyone as this is a family secret.” “Ok Batdad.” You’re child whispered, giggling at the nickname.

• Damian ok with them joining the family business as long as they pass his training resumés. They don’t go out if they’re sick or injured no matter what as this increases the likelihood of reckless behaviour.

• Teaching them the ways of Wayne Enterprises since they’re the future heir now.

• Your child learning about the hero business when they get older and finally accepting their father isn’t the tooth fairy.

• Giving them the choice of whether they want to become a vigilante with you supporting them 100% and Damian teaching them League of Assassins techniques regardless of their decision.

• Joking with you and Damian about becoming a villain because they’re fully equipped to do so but knowing that’s not how they were brought up.

• Them secretly having a favourite uncle but only Damian and yourself know who it is and refuse to tell the others.

• Kate Kane being the go to person for anything LGBT+ related, if your child is in fact an LGBT citizen or not.

• Generally being quite an open family that comes with a few cracks but you’re happy.

If it’s a Boy: • “Looks like there’s a new son of Batman now.” “Indeed there is, I hope he’ll be my successor one day.”

• Father son bonding activities, most of which included one on one training sessions. There a lot of testosterone in your home.

• Play fights all of the time, literally with anyone of his uncles that comes over. Whether it be Dick, Jason, Tim or Duke he’s going to show them the new moves Damian taught him.

• “I’m going to be the next Red Hood. You watch me!” As your son runs around with finger guns yelling ‘pew pew’ at inanimate objects much to your amusement. “I’m going to kill Todd…”

• You’re son actually wanting to have powers like Jon, Supermans son, who visits on some occasions. Though after a long conversation about practicality with his father, (c/n) is convinced he’ll be the next Batman. “Well Superman doesn’t have a Batmobile.” “But he can fly father.” “(C/n) has a point Dami.”

• Your son imitating Damian any chance he gets since he looks up to his father more than he realises. “I am the son of the demon!” “(Y/n), what was that?” “Dick, do you really want to question it? He has Dami’s genes remember.” “That’s who he reminds me of, Damian when he was younger - such a little sh-” Covering Dicks mouth before he could finish that sentence.

• Bruce saying he looks a lot like Damian and is proud of you both for raising your son so well. (C/n) has great manners at Galas when he’s older and is a hit with the ladies. Of course, for now - you’re the most important female in his life until he finds that special someone. Damian couldn’t be more proud. “Meet my parents, Damian and (Y/n) Wayne.” “It’s a pleasure, I hope our son is treating you well.” “Yes, thank you Mrs Wayne.”

If it’s a Girl: • Literally his little princess who he loves dearly.

• Cass coming over to style your daughters hair and spend time with her. Even though Cass isn’t talkative, your daughter speaks enough for the both of them. “Can you do plaits Auntie Cass, like milkmaid ones?” “I bet you can, you’re really good at making hair look pretty.” Cass just kisses her forehead and starts braiding.

• Finding out that she isn’t going to be a girly girl from a very early age. “As I have Batdad, I get to drive the Batmobile when I’m older - maybe I can race!” “I can teach you to drive now princess, I could drive by your age.” “No! Damian, that’s illegal!” “So is vigilantism.” “…”

• Barbara and Stephanie coming over to help out and Stephanie even brought your daughter a Batgirl costume. Stephanie being so involved for personal reasons and just becoming her auntie not that there was any question. “Steph, why did you buy this?” “Why not? She’ll follow in our footsteps one day.” “I’ll make sure she knows all the technical tricks.” Barbara was quick to add referring to her way with computers.

• Kate Kane and Harper Row also visiting to check up on you both. Kate claiming that girls have got to stick together. Your daughter thinking Harpers hair is the coolest thing in the world. “Mommy, can I have my hair just like Harpers? With pink in it and can I have it rainbow?” “That would look so cool!” Came the exaggerated enthusiasm of Harper. “When you’re older, you can dye it however you want.”

• Damian gets over protective when romantic relationships come into the equation. “Father, I fight crime with you at weekends. I’m perfectly capable of handling a romantic partner.” “It’s funny you think they’ll even get a chance to get close to you.” “Mom, a little help?!”

• “Touch my daughter and you’re dead.” “You’re dad is joking right (c/n)?” Came your daughters current interest. “Haha, uh yeah… no. No he’s not joking.” “So what? Beat me to death?” “More like slice you. With his katana.” Your daughter corrected. “And that’s only if your uncles don’t get to them first (c/n)!” “Thanks for that mom.”

[swiftwaterprawn]

I drink lots tea and also call people twats a lot. It's pretty much all I do except write.

whats a stereotype for your country that you absolutely do. mine is that i unironically go "eh" and apologize a lot and i often drink maple syrup straight