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#at least it's a different rage now
dragonsong17 · 2 years
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Hunting for the last couple of rainbow frogs was filling me with rage so i decided to take a break from that and try out Pitioss Dungeon. A number of flying car crashes later, I finally made it there and A) this is not at all what I was expecting and B) this is somehow much, much worse
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FNAF movie Mike vs Vanny on ordering pizzaplex food
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gummi-ships · 1 month
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Kingdom Hearts 3 - Rage Form
#kingdom hearts 3#kh3#sora#rage form#arendelle#formchange#my gif#rage form is so intriguing#sora still behaves in a wild animalistic fashion similar to his anti form but it's different#anti form felt as if he relinquished all self control and acted strictly on instinct just like a heartless#he used to run around hunched over on all fours and fight tooth and claw with reckless abandon#but here you can at least see SOME semblance of who he is. he's able to wield his keyblade while in this form which is pretty major#he still fights in an absolutely chaotic and primal manner but it feels evolved#the big difference is you call upon rage form at will. he channels his rage and darkness in a desperate last resort to stay alive#which is very significant but he still loses some control like the ability to use of magic; items; shotlocks; etc#it's cool to see darkness used in this way but i really want sora to able to explore themes of darkness within himself in future games#i want these to be more than cool forms with fun gameplay. i want them to have implications that something dark is brewing and needs to be-#brought to the surface and tackled head on because we've never seen anyone capable of cloaking themselves in darkness in such a way#take riku's dark form for example. he's in control and he's very much still himself. it's entirely different#on another note i'm now thinking about how hp is fully restored when activating rage form but you have the choice to give it up again-#when using risk charge. it'll increase attack damage but you're still walking a dangerous line in the pursuit of power
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unma · 2 months
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thought I might as well show y'all what happened to me earlier today. No debuffs of Meursault, I just got unlucky here. Also, he was at full health before getting hit by this.
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desi-yearning · 1 year
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If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
A lot, honestly. But mainly how I had to let go of all the things I liked or wanted to do. I've always wanted to go for cricket, chess, gymnastics and badminton coaching and also learn a few musical instruments though I had the capability my parents never joined me for anything of such sorts. They never sent me for dancing, singing, drawing, painting, calligraphy or any such arts and now I ended up with no artistic skills whatsoever and I hate it so much. It kills me a little everytime I think about it.
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hella1975 · 1 year
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by pure evil accident taob zuko's current mental state is the exact same as the one ive been stuck in for the past few weeks and that's a bit funny to me. like i started writing this chapter months ago and knew what i was doing with it even longer ago and suddenly ive manifested it into reality. we are both facing the horrors rn
#when the angry character finally learns to acknowledge their rage not as its own problem but as a coping mechanism to the problem#& faces at once the relief of finding the source of all this anger & the horror of realising that the anger itself was never the final boss#and it leaves them in a depressive state where they actually MISS the anger because at least that was active and - in a sense - dignified#whereas this just feels stilted and mopey and like each day is passing and you're losing time doing nothing#but you cant shake it anyway and wow im no longer talking about zuko!!!! we stay embarassing ourselves over taob!!!!#like i realised just now while staring off into space stirring my tea that the reason this particular depressive episode has hit me so hard#(aside the fact it's been a pretty extreme one and my paranoia has rlly flared up to the point ive felt honest to god CRAZY lately haha)#is because it's so DIFFERENT to how i usually respond to feeling like this#like normally my temper gets very quick and i completely isolate and i get mean and sharp#and i convince myself that everyone is out to get me and/or hates me and therefore i must manipulate everyone in my life#and ofc NONE OF THOSE THINGS ARE A GOOD RESPONSE. I AM NOT PROUD OF THEM#THEY ARE ALSO NOT NEARLY AS BAD AS HOW I USED TO BE HENCE I KNOW I AM GETTING BETTER#SLOWLY PAINFULLY WITH MY NAILS DIGGING IN THE DIRT BUT I AM GETTING BETTER ALL THE SAME#but STILL despite how awful those things are they're also very external. like i hurt the people around me in order to protect myself#and there's a dignity to that. there's more control there even if ultimately it's a lack of control causing it#like i have some fucked opinions from my upbringing and ik that like im quite a selfish person and it's bc i was raised to truly believe#that hurting others is always optimal over letting myself be seen as weak. like if my options are to hurt someone even someone i love#or let myself be vulnerable then sometimes i STILL will pick the former (it used to be all the time though <3 progress is progress)#and anger has always been sold to me as a very dignified STRONG emotion and it's how you're SUPPOSED to respond to badness#otherwise you're weak and a baby and pathetic etc etc#and just bc you know something is wrong doesnt mean you didnt internalise the fuck out of it anyway#like i will always see anger as the 'dignified' emotion and unlearning it regardless of that has been one of the hardest things ive done#('wow hella your own journey with mental illness is the literal exact same as taob zuko's-' i will hospitalise the both of us)#whereas currently ive just been sad and pathetic and oversharing to anyone who will listen and desperate for someone to look at me#and be like 'you're not okay' and to fix it FOR ME. like im not ANGRY im SAD and im not used to that response#AND GUESS WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENS THIS CHAPTER BY PURE FUCKING COINCIDENCE?? LITERALLY WHAT#like it's been happening for a few chapters that we're finally moving from anger to sadness on my unofficial healing chart#ever since zuko's outburst with hakoda when zi se had that tantrum#but this is the first time we see Sad Coping Mechanism as a response to a problem instead of Angry Coping Mechanism#taob updates
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eddie-rifff · 4 months
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im down to taking 3 psych meds daily from 5. i think thats good. there was a point where i really needed all 5 but i think i really just need an ssri and maybe something for anxiety on top of that. currently im on an ssri, a mood stabilizer (which i never needed to begin with...), and an snri. i was prescribed the mood stabilizer almost 10 years ago because i was misdiagnosed as bipolar II when in hindsight they should have diagnosed me with autism (what i described and my doc thought was bipolar mania was just autistic excitement) but like whatever. anyway i am on that and i really dont think i need to be but the last time i tried going off of it it was pretty bad. i was at 225 mg and i went down to 200 which was ok but then i went down to 175 and my mood was, well, really unstable. so i went back up to 200 where ive been for idk 7 years. so now im like dependent on this drug i didnt need in the first place. i dont like taking drugs that i dont need to be on u know. i also dont think the snri is really doing much but at least that was for a legit diagnosis.
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astralazuli · 5 months
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??????????
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stochastiz · 18 days
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tfw it seems like your job genuinely couldn't care less about your wellbeing :)
#the first time i got covid was at my last job and after that i developed the immune suppression and chronic ear infections that have been#ruining me for the past 2 years#then yesterday we found out that the kid i sent home sick friday (who i spent most of the day 1-on-1 with bc they were miserable) tested#positive friday night. but they didn't have an official diagnosis so work refused to tell families there had been a close contact. then this#morning we hear that another of my kids and their parent both tested positive. but those were 'only' home tests so we weren't allowed to#tell families there had been yet another close contact. all of my kids today were boogery and coughing but they don't require test-to-stay#or any isolation for close contacts with 'mild' symptoms. so i have gotten to spend 3 days now with at least 2 positive infants. i'm still#not even fully over the mild cold and subsequent infection i got 2 weeks ago. i tested negative again last night but there's just no way i#actually won't get it even if my home tests say i'm negative.#this is the first week back to school for older siblings. and they didn't warn anyone about a close contact over the long weekend when#i'm sure a bunch of families had gatherings. i'm just so fucking pissed. why tf do you think we're still seeing this shit????#our policies at work are treating covid 'like any other mild illness' so not only are all of my classroom INFANTS all being exposed but also#me and my co-teacher!!! and they don't care at all!!!!!!! there is a solid chance that when i get it it'll be v e r y bad for me#but who gives a shit? i'm just another disabled pos who shouldn't be working if i can't risk getting sick. bc that's how life works right?#i don't have words to explain the level of rage i feel over all of this. i'm so fucking tired of it.#pretty sure i use a different tag every time but#covid#chronically ill#stochastic ramblings
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i forgot how much abandonment and loneliness has affected me and then i watch doctor who videos where the doctor talks about losing people and getting tired and losing his mind and then i'm reminded of the fresh trauma of the last few years and then i want to fucking sob my eyes out
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#guess who fucking fried 3 very fucking expensive machines today. me. i did#bc a fucking cabled decided to burn out and there was only one little symptom so i switched out the sensor head and inadvertently fried#another instrument. then when i was wait. hang on wtf happened here? and i was trouble shooting. i fried another one. so im down to one#machine. fucking holy christ. one mother fucking cable. a problem i cant fucking control and then i just fucking spred the problem#god dammit. which means i either have to do 20 additional days or we cut the number of reps to 7 or 8#and because of this. ive Disrupted the plans of 4 different labs bc it takes at least 3 months for them to do calibration#ugh. i was so angry. whatever. its fine. these things happen in labs and u kinda just have to deal with it. i dont really feel bad on a#personal level bc ive been working with these things for like 4 years and if i mishandled the problem something was pretty fucked up#bc ive fixed a lot of fucking problems on those machines. bleh. and as im like simmering with rage my family is texting eachother like#yayyy vacation soon ☺️#ugh. its just so frustrating bc i onlu had like 7 days left and i could have got thru all 10 reps. its gonna b maddening on one machine#ans ill have to do more when i fucking get back from vacation when i want it fucking done now but whatever ive bought#my fucking plane tickets and i leave in less than 2 weeks. plus ill get to spend at least one day at home#god im gonna be such a fucking bummer tho. im gonna get of the plane and my fam will b like how r u? and im gonna b like not fucking great#i am barely a functional person and im sure ill b so stressed abt thr fact i have to come back here that ill b on edge the whole time bc#thsts what happened over winter break. whatever. next weekend ill b fucking outta here for like 11 days#and just a few more months until i can leave for good. never walk into thst fucking building again. not that i have anything ready for thst#move. bc again. im barely a functional person#god. now i have to fucking ask for thr stupid bottom of the chamber for this last machine. i swear to christ if i have to fucking drive#down to [redacted] i fucking dont even kno#unrelated
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roguestorm · 2 years
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very interested in how marvel + dc are both experimenting with the webtoon format (infinite scroll/minimal paneling + simpler art style) and how what is published in that format is not traditional superhero stories but things that might be more in line generically with what you would find in a webtoon (for example, making a whole comic dedicated to romance, which is a very popular webtoon genre but not a popular genre for the comics you’d find in an american comic book store)
it’s very different from the early days of infinite comics, where the paneling was often very important and it moved from panel to panel with powerpoint animations. and it’s always interesting to see how marvel and dc respond to other comic forms and try to capitalize on what is popular. especially right now when it seems like the traditional comic book industry is perpetually on the edge of dying.
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podcast-hoard · 1 year
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it’s so interesting to me that murph said in this short rest episode that he thinks d&d parties make more sense if most of the characters aren’t too wacky/out there wrt weird races because my first d&d group was only weird guys. tiefling, water genasi, dragonborn, and rabbitfolk. maybe it’s just a cis vs trans dnd player thing lol
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lunarsapphism · 1 year
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#found a picture of me in a dress from last year#and realized i tried that dress on the other day and have a photo that looks almost exactly like it#same pose and everything#checked the date and realized that i took them (unknowingly) almost exactly one year apart. the difference is only like two or three days#and its just weird cause like. ive lost a fairly significant amount of weight since then#and what they dont tell you about growing up not skinny is that if you do lose weight at some point and become smaller#it doesnt necessarily feel good?? yknow? like in your brain i mean.#i feel so incredibly weird about it. especially seeing the side by side.#and its also not that i think that i wasnt pretty even though i was not confident in myself at all. cause i was! i think i was at least#and i think im pretty now too. but i think the feeling of weirdness comes from the fact that most people would look at those photos and go#'oh you look so much better/healthier now!' or something along those lines.#like other people would see me now as an improvement rather than the exact same guy just at a different stage in my life#does that make sense?? i hope so#its hard to convey this idea#idk. its weird. i like the way i fit into clothes better and i like the way my body handles my chronic pain a bit better now#but i feel a lot of guilt for thinking that way because i have quite literally never looked like this before#and if im happiest with the way i look now then what does that mean for the body i had my whole life before this? makes me sad a bit :(#ive always wanted to love every version of myself#but god it is so hard to do that when fatphobia is raging and rampant literally everywhere#aiilov-personal
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ame-to-ame · 2 months
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anyway realizing i share the same indignation towards things that feel senselessly wrong but unlike nina i just run away from it point blank 🤠👍
#on today's what do you resonate with in each character that you don't like precisely bc it reflects yourself#is it bad that in each character the thing i resonate with the most is usually the thing that is dragging them down lmao#marcille's anxiety over losing people to death mithrun's symbolism ryo's 孤傲 and being okay with that subaru's 圆滑 rupa's reason for maturity#nina and i are very different and we're mad over different things on different scales#but at the end of the day it's that sense of justice and inability to accept ignoring certain things to maintain a facade as a bigger idea#i just have a hard time understanding it sometimes. the supposed necessary sacrifices.#when you stand for developing that tool and tell me it'll be good for humanity in the long run#how do you ignore the people it negatively impacts right now. how can you brush that aside for a promise of an abstract future.#i don't know how it'll benefit us in the long run i can't see it but i know the bad things it's causing right now that are very real#when i hear about how people use it to generate reasons to justify brutality. it's fucked up. it's horrific.#and I'm scared for how the growth will continue to enlarge the gap for disadvantaged groups.#how do you ignore the very real issues that have already happened and the impact it will continue to have throughout the development#by doing so you're silently accepting those 'necessary sacrifices'. but they're real people. they're real people. how do you. accept that.#but it's really not in the scope of things i can fix or change so. trying not to have it kill me from inside.#at least nina can sing i can't even sing lmao i only have my fucked up vocal chords and fucked up fingers#thank goodness for the existence of string instruments and paint. maybe i go sew something this weekend. maybe i go to a rage room.
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bilal-salah0 · 2 months
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Our lives before the genocide were not perfect, to say the least, but we were happy and hopeful. Our dreams were and are still bigger than the walls, barbed wire, and tanks surrounding us but today we find ourselves in a situation where hope keeps being dimmed by constant humiliation and unprecedented injustice. The adults in my family are barely holding on.
They're doing their best but what is our children's fault? What did they do to deserve such unbearable suffering at a very young age? When will this nightmare end? Will I be able to see them all someday safe, sound, happy and thriving like all children should? Such cruel neverending questions keep haunting me night and day. What we seek, above all, is not only to live in safety but also with dignity which is a basic human right we have always been denied.
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whenever I see Omar and Salah's pictures in our beautiful home that was leveled to the ground, I can't help but compare them to the state they're in now; struggling to survive in a flimsy, airless makeshift tent surrounded by rubble, all sorts of disease-carrying insects, the stench of sewage floods and garbage, and the smell of death everywhere only made worse by the sweltering summer heat. The newborns' and the children's innocent faces amidst such misery won't leave my thoughts. They fill me with grief and rage because of how helpless I am. Seeing the kids smile and hold their heads up high, despite all the suffering and fear their little hearts have to go through every single day, is pure torture. Their childhood games have been replaced by waiting in long lines for food and water and carrying containers, sometimes heavier than their fargile malnourished bodies. Most of their playgrounds, kindergartens and schools have been reduced to dust and rubble, and the ones left are still being bombed allowing them no respite or refuge from
the horrors of the war.
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For almost ten months now, our little angels have been enduring hardships beyond their years; ripped from the safety and warmth of their home and everything they knew and loved and forced into a life of pain and peril where only the unknown awaits them. Your support is our only ray of hope amidst such a dire and bleak situation. My family and especially our children need you now more than ever as the airstrikes, starvation, and water and health crises are only intensifying and we are being further humiliated and annihilated. I never wanted it to come to this. I used to think I could handle everything myself but I truly have no choice but to ask for help now. Please help me protect my family and bring them closer to the life of safety and dignity they deserve as all humans do, wherever they are.
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