#b) nobody can agree on who actually said it

[vrmxlho]

ahh i feel the same!! my whole family comes from croatia and we often go down for holidays, but only during summer. until then i'm literally freezing my ass off 😭

hadhjhdj the way i get that- i've been procrastinating my skincare for some time, like i do it every second evening or smth and my skin is breaking out again LIKE- STOP BEING AN IDIOT

but i'm just being lazy and yeah :(

lmao i don't mind, i can tell you more about the drama in future, cuz we literally have a whole lore page and so many screenshots, it ain't normal. and i've known this person like,,, a bit over a year now?

and your former best friend sounds like a bitch, i'm so glad and proud that you cut her off. i know this is super hard, especially when you don't wanna upset the people around you (which isn't even the one who fucking has the drama with you)

yeah that's so true!! i'm doing so much better now that i've cut them off and only after i did that, i actually realized how bad they were for me and i'm just very glad the whole thing is behind me

and this is so true!! i love listening to drama but i don't wanna be involved LMAO

OMG CROATIA IS SO SO GORGEOUS i'm sure you've heard this before many times but i genuinely love croatia so so much. zagreb, pula, porec are like the only three places i've been to but they were so beautiful.

also so real with the skincare, i do not want to admit how many times i've skipped showering cuz i'm too lazy to take my fucking clothes off like girl you stink bffr 😭 i remember when i was younger my cousin convinced me to stop brushing my teeth w him cuz "animals don't brush their teeth" spoiler that was so fucking dumb

THE FUCKING LORE PAGES THAT'S SO FUNNY HELP 😭 my friend had a meme account on insta back when we were still friends w that bitch where we just made horrible memes of her and that was our way of coping.

i have so much drama from uni cuz i have friends in other unis who tell us everything since we don't go to the same uni as them and we can't like tell on them ig??? it's actually wild +++ also from high school cuz i went to school w these insanely rich kids (not saying i'm not as well) but they were like actual aristocrats/royalty and they were actually insane

[6esiree]

Hazbin Hotel x GN! Reader Who Makes a Group Chat

Summary: The title is pretty self-explanatory, but basically the reader, who is Gen Z, makes a group chat for everybody in the hotel. I used that episode where they’re doing trust exercises (but I changed it to bonding to be more fitting). I also accidentally made it a little bit of Husk x Reader…but I guess it’s mostly implied?

Warnings: Uhh, swearing.

—————

Bonding—one of the most difficult obstacles Charlie had yet to overcome. While she got along with everybody just fine, trusting them from the moment they set foot in the Hazbin Hotel, nobody else could seem to do the same, especially as their personalities constantly clashed with each other.

When it came to you, well, you were actually a pleasant person to be around with. If anybody had anything bad to say about you, it would probably be the way you acted, which was rather…different than what they were accustomed to. I mean, you were one of the newest and youngest residents in the hotel, having just died a few months ago at the whopping age of 21. Could they really blame you?

Exhibit A:

“Gay son or thot daughter?” You asked Husk after finishing your second cocktail, innocently swinging your legs back and forth as you anticipated his response.

“Alright, I think you’ve had enough, dollface,” Husk said, withdrawing the paw that held the cocktail he had just whipped up for you, leaving you pouting.

Exhibit B:

“Iron deficiency gang stand up,” You said as you quickly got up from the couch, your knees instantly buckling underneath you. “Oh SHIT!”

“Fucking hell!” Angel Dust screeched, catching you before your face could meet the ground.

Exhibit C:

“Sometimes I fill the room with negative energy because I don’t want to be there,” You said as you stood next to Alastor, trying to get along with the smiling man.

“Alright, I’m off to Cannibal Town! I believe Rosie needed something,” Alastor quickly announced before walking out.

Yeah, you were definitely something else, but that’s exactly why Charlie liked you. Even though she and the rest struggled to understand your humor or some of the things you said in general, it was nice to have you around.

So, when it came to overcoming the lack of bonding among the Hazbin Hotel’s residents, the Princess of Hell turned to you, especially after Angel Dust decided to bring all of you to try out bondage…of all the fucking things.

“Hey, Y/N—Oh, oh my goodness,” Charlie winced as a sinner approached her, trying to entice her by dangling some fuzzy handcuffs in front of her face. “No thank you! Sorry. Anyway, uh, I was wondering if you had any ideas to bring everyone together? Something less…like this?”

You stood in front of Husk, who had sought refuge behind you after Niffty appeared next to him with a whip in her hand, excited to punish some “bad boys.” Not like you could do much to conceal him, especially considering that you were about Vaggie’s height, but the little demon did avoid you after you took pity on a roach and threw it out the hotel, sparing it from her wrath.

“Really? Oh, shit! Okay, um, let me think for a moment,” You said, happy that she had asked you to suggest something, “Errr, you know what always helped me get closer to people? A group chat. I know it sounds kind of stupid, but like, I think it would be a nice way for us to slowly get to know each other!”

“Oh, yes! Okay, sure, we can try that out!” Charlie gasped, clasping her hands together, but then she frowned, “Wait, what about Alastor? He won’t be able to participate since he doesn’t use a phone.”

“Doesn’t seem like a problem to me,” Husk spoke up, obviously content with the idea of the Radio Demon being absent from one thing in his life.

“I mean, he’s not even here right now,” You shrugged, agreeing with Husk, who shot you a thankful smile, “I’m pretty sure he’d say no anyway.”

Charlie sighed, but you were right. Alastor avoided technology like the plague, especially Voxtech. He wouldn’t be able to join a group chat even if he had a flip phone—which he definitely didn’t.

“I guess you have a point,” Charlie said, already starting towards the exit of this place, “Alright, let’s get out of here. Come on!”

“Booooo! You guys are boring,” Angel Dust said, dragging Niffty with him, who was the only one sad about leaving. “Except for Niffty, of course. She gets it.”

Back at the hotel, all of you sat in the parlor, exchanging phone numbers with each other. Creating a group chat was supposed to be a simple task, but for some damn reason, y’all were struggling. Sir Pentious forgot his phone number, so you had to help him out with that, and Niffty kept getting side-tracked every time a roach appeared before she could take out her phone.

Everyone else did just fine, thankfully, Husk even handing you his phone to avoid the hassle—which was on light mode (gross). Anyway, big mistake on his part because you decided to take 0.5 photos of yourself when he wasn’t looking, setting one as his lock screen. You tried not to laugh as you handed the cat-demon his phone back, leaving it unlocked so he wouldn’t notice right away.

“Okay, soooo, there! Done,” You said, successfully adding everybody to a group chat on SMS.

“Who said hello? I cannot tell,” Sir Pentious asked as soon as you sent a message.

“Damnit, Pentious. Hand me your phone again,” You said, getting up and taking a seat next to the serpent so you could show him how to name each of his contacts.

“Look, if you tap here then go to info, you’ll be able to name your contacts,” You demonstrated, Pentious staring at you blankly, “But I guess I’ll do it myself, just to be quicker.”

After that, everything was good. The only one who doubted a group chat would work was Vaggie, but as the days passed by, she realized it was much easier to communicate that way. Charlie was having a blast, reacting to every message that was sent with a heart, Pentious used emojis like the precious little man he was, Angel usually sent links from Sinstagram and Envee that he found funny, Husk responded sometimes, but with the most dry texts known to mankind, and Niffty, well, she forgot there was a group chat. Whenever she was reminded of its existence, however, she just sent pictures of the bugs she killed. You always reacted with a sad face.

“Can you stop saying “Congratulations” and “Happy Birthday”,” Vaggie announced as she descended the stairs alongside Charlie, looking at you specifically.

“Why are you glaring at me? I’m not the one spamming it!” You said, turning around to see Angel snickering on the couch, confetti and balloons popping up every time any one of you opened the group chat.

“Yeah, but you taught him how to do it!” Vaggie grumbled.

“Come on, Vaggie, it’s not their fault,” Charlie said, looking at you apologetically before disappearing to the kitchen to get breakfast.

“See? Charlie said I’m not at fault,” You said, but she didn’t back down.

“Uh-huh.”

“For real, though, I didn’t think he’d abuse it. Would you have, Husk?” You turned to the cat-demon in hopes that he would defend you too.

“I ain’t helping you until you show me how to change my lock screen,” Husk grunted, his phone lighting up every time Angel sent a new message, the 0.5 photo of your face popping up.

“Okay, then! That’s fine,” You shrugged, Husk rolling his eyes in response. “I can take care of myself.”

“If you really wanted to change it, you would have searched it up,” Angel said from the parlor, setting down his phone much to Vaggie’s delight. “Just admit you like looking at their face, kitty.”

Husk growled, the bottle of cheap booze in his hand slightly cracking in his grip. Vaggie couldn’t be bothered to intervene, disappearing to the kitchen as well.

“Call me kitty one more time and I’ll jam this bottle down your throat,” Husk threatened, but Angel only laughed in response.

“Sure, whatever,” Angel said, shooting you two a wink as he got up from the couch and stretched, looking down at his phone as it vibrated, “I’d argue with ya more on that, but Val’s calling. Maybe we can continue this conversation after work.”

“Hey! Well, apparently you like looking at me too, because your lock screen has been my face all along,” You said with a mischievous smile.

“Yeah, I would have noticed—” Angel said as he looked down at his phone, turning it off and on, “Wait, what the fuck? How—WHEN DID YOU DO THIS?”

“I have my ways,” You shrugged, Husk chuckling as Angel stormed out of the hotel mumbling in disbelief, fixing to change his lock screen.

There was a moment of silence shared between the two of you when the front doors of the Hazbin Hotel closed behind the spider, the only sound bouncing off the walls being the clanging of plates and utensils in the kitchen. You had already eaten earlier, so you stayed at the bar, enjoying the cat-demon’s presence.

“You’re something else, y’know,” Husk suddenly said, looking at you as he languidly sipped at his drink.

“I know,” You laughed, reaching for his phone, “Here, let me change your lock screen for you.”

A paw landed on your hand, catching you off guard. You looked up at Husk, wondering why he had stopped you.

“If I wanted to change it, I would have,” Husk said, his claws lightly dragging along your skin as he withdrew his phone from your grasp. “I ain’t stupid.”

Oh, man. Your face was suddenly hot.

“I, uh, I didn’t think—” You started, Husk quirking a brow at you. “You know what? Shut up!”

“You alright, dollface?” Husk asked.

His tail swished back and forth behind him, causing small drafts of wind to caress your ankles. Husk was obviously amused by how easily he had flustered you—the slick fuck. No longer wanting to satisfy him, you decided to be your usual self.

“Yes, I’m alright! But are you?” You shot back, Husk blinking in confusion.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Clearly you’re not because your phone is on light mode,” You continued, “That’s absolutely disgusting.”

[txttletale]

could you elaborate on your thoughts on boom and 73 yards ( i agree with you i am just struggling to put into words why.)

boom was whatever. the initial conceit of the doctor being trapped and having to stay calm was really cool! i really like that. the ambulances that euthanize you if you're not deemed worthy of medical care and the tacky chatgpt hologram ghosts were both really cool ideas. it just doesn't stick the landing for me, the twists are contrived and fall apart given any thought whatsoever. like what the fuck were any of the soldiers Doing if there just straight up weren't any enemies. it's a twist that sounds cool to say more than it has any meaningful impact on the story or the stakes. i guess 'the arms manuifacturer created a fake conflict' is the intended emtional stakes there but that would hit like a hundred times harder if it was an actual conflict between two factions and people were dying, right? like if anything sending a christian militia to blow themselves up tae fuck on a nowhere planet instead of presumably killing actual living people is an improvement, surely?

also the resolution was dumb as fuck lol i am a huge hater of power of love saves the day shit not because i'm a cynical misanthrope but because it never fails to make me say 'oh so i guess nobody ever loved anybody before lol' and this is no exception like if one chatbot can shut down the whole operation beacuse he loves his daughter are we meant to believe that no other parents or hell nobody who loved anybody else for any reason died in this fake war before? it's cheap and schmaltzy and unearned. anyway the first twentyish minutes of this are all-time great doctor who and gatwa/gibson were incredible in it but it absolutely falls apart into a confused pileo f some of the worst Moffatisms at the end

73 yards on the other hand was incredible! obviously like it requires you to approach it with a different mindset to most of doctor who, right, doctor who usually furnishes you with the big explanation scnee where the doctor says 'well the ghosts were actually particle wave vectorforms created with the necros radiation from the god-king's techsceptre' or whatever--this is the usual narrative mode of sci-fi--but 73 yards is fantasy, right, this is the twilight zone, this is 'wouldn't that be fucked up?'. i interrogate the technical and logical specifics of boom so much when i think about it because that's the language boom is speaking, boom is framing itself within this logical, a-to-b worldview, the satisfying click-together puzzlebox. but 73 yards is a nightmare or a folk tale, right? kate stewart¹ says it herself, 'when faced with the inexplicable, we make up rules and apply them to it'.

so yknow reading it that way it all clicks together beautifully, right, (apart from russel t davies' embarassing swing and miss at Political Commentary in the middle. we get it davies you wrote years and years. we know. trust me we know). the doctor and ruby disrupt the binding circle, free mad jack, and are punished -- the doctor, as perpetrator, with being banished (perhaps in jack's place) and ruby with her worst fear coming true constantly, until ruby defeats mad jack, re-sealing him and fixing what she broke, at which point the circle rewards her by reversing the punishments. and the core horror i think is very effective and unsettling! the idea that there is something that someone could say to turn everyone against you, the closest people to you in your life, your own family, the institutions that are meant to deal with the exact problem you're having--that's fucking terrifying! and yknow i think especially as an autistic trans lesbian something that speaks to me a lot

so yeah. i think that boom establishes its logics and framework and then trips and falls onto its face while 73 yards does the same and then makes perfect use of them. that said i think in 20 years people who are autistic about doctor who will be like 'did you know in the 2020s there were two episodes in a row where the doctor caused the entire plot to happen by stepping on something' and thjatll be the main thing they're remembered for

[y0ur-loca1-lyr3]

Alastor when falling in love/dating headcanons

A/N; my first time trying headcanons lol, hope I did well!

Falling in love

Let’s be honest, Alastor rarely actually likes most beings as a friend, let alone as a romantic partner

But when he does for either scenario, he has to notice that person as more than just some pawn for entertainment

Maybe you’re more socially intelligent, maybe you have more power, maybe you’re closer to Charlie, maybe all of those

But there has to be something that makes him see you as a threat to his power, or his control

Because of this when you first enter the hotel, he’s going to try to upstage you

If he can find a flaw about you, he’ll utilize that to the max

Think how he acted around Lucifer in ‘Dad beat Dad’

But when he notices you’re not going to be intimidated by him he starts to grow angry

If you really wanna ruffle his feathers just ask “uhm…who are you..?”

Not even in a polite way, just in a rude judgmental way

Oh, that makes his blood boil

When he’s not around you, at first he’s trying to get rid of you, take away the threat

But then you leave for a long period of time without notice to anyone but husk

And not even sober husk

So basically nobody really knows where the hell you went (pun intended)

The first maybe hour or two Alastor was like “good riddance”

But then for some damn reason he started to miss you

If you’re gone for more than one day, his mood actually visibly changes

Sure he’s still smiling, but he’s still a bit less motivated to do things

And he’s probably having troubles with coming up with ideas for his radio broadcast

Then you come back and he’s back to normal

It’s like his subconscious went “oh, cool :D”

But now that brings up another obstacle for him

As established before he wants any threats out of his way, but he somehow has grown attached to you?

This wasn’t what he wanted, no not at all

Now what was he supposed to do?

Even worse is the realization that he still has humanity

Humanity is weakness

And if some like say… Vox found out about this?

He’d be royally fucked

It takes a looong while for him to figure out that A. It was love, and B. Come to terms with that

Lots of avoidance and back handed comments

If you sat at the bar? He’d leave

If you tried to compliment him, you’d only get a short “Hm.”

If you invited him to talk with you, even just to get to know him he’d make an excuse

And if Charlie attempts to force him he will refuse/ escape in some way

Blowing up and asking him what his problem is won’t help either

He’ll sit there with a patient smile with petty thoughts, and justifications for his actions running through his head as he tried to appear unfazed

Until someone interrupts/ ends the conversation or you just give up and leave

He’ll leave while rolling his eyes slightly, muttering about how sensitive people are these days

Once he does finally come to terms with it, he’s less hostile around you

Don’t get me wrong he still avoids you like the plague because you’re his only weakness

But he’s kinder to you when he does interact with you

Maybe he’ll offer to pay for your drink before leaving

He might even leave a little box of homemade chocolates at your door, or give you some ‘leftover’ Jambalaya he made specifically for you to try

Little favors like that

Dating

It’s never really said aloud that the two of you are dating

It just was sort of agreed upon silently between the two of you

One day he invited you via letter to come skygaze with him at his radio tower

At first you’re kind of suspicious that he has an ulterior motive

But when you get there and you’re invited to sit beside Alastor, you realize he just wanted to see you. Why? You didn’t know, but at least his intentions weren’t ill

Then he crossed his pinky with yours

Nothing grand like kissing, he’s not too fond of physical affection

But just a small bit of contact

If you choose to interlock your pinky with his, internally he’ll lose his mind

It’s like confirmation that you feel the same way without verbally saying it

Since then everyone just sort of knew at the very least he cared a bit more about you

He’d frequently talk with you

Like how most people would interact with good friends

Except he gets a little more protective of you

There’ll be a shadow that follows you everywhere

Sometimes the shadow will tease a bit

Maybe pick up a piece of hair and then put back in place quick, or maybe brush against your arm, nothing harmful, really

Since he doesn’t really show his love through physical affection, he shows it through gifts or acts of service

Mainly acts of service

You’ll often go back to your room after a hard day to find your bed made and your pillows fluffed with a new stuffed animal on your bed

His favorite way to show his affection physically is by your hand

He won’t really hold your hand outright, but he’ll usually gently kiss it after saying something romantic

Maybe if your sitting at the bar, talking with Husk he will

When he’s feeling especially happy, or romantic, or he somehow got wasted, he’ll give you a peck on the lips, but that’s about the only time you two really kiss

He will cuddle if you ask to but otherwise he doesn’t really do cuddling

The first time you tell him you love him, even just as a quick goodbye, he’ll melt on the inside

If you look close enough you can see his eyes soften a tad bit

He’ll probably say “you too” if the both of you are in public, or something along those lines, but if you’re in private, maybe cuddling or as he’s comforting you for some reason

He’ll say it softly, and then most likely give you a small head pat, or if he’s getting really sentimental, he’ll give you a peck on the forehead

All in all, he does love you, he just sort of shows it in his own way that he’s comfortable with <3

[probably-writing-x]

Tread Lightly

Summary: It was never a good idea for two pogues to date, it was something you’d agreed on for years. But sometimes it was just impossible to avoid… especially when it came to you and JJ.

Warnings: Sexual references, cursing

Author’s Note: Just a little idea that came to me, I’ve been struggling to find inspiration to write the requests in my inbox so hopefully y’all can be patient with me <3 Thanks for the love as always xoxo

“Alright, you versus a bear, who’s winning?” You point towards John B, your beer almost spilling in your hand.

“Are you kidding? A literal bear? I wouldn’t stand a chance,” John B scoffs, reaching forward to take another drink from the cooler.

You were all dispersed around the grass outside of the Chalet - Pope and Kie sat on one of the tree stumps, John B on old garden chairs and JJ on the floor with his back against one of the trees.

“What kind of bear are we talking about?” Pope questions, “Because polar bear isn’t even worth talking about. Then again, I don’t think you’d win against any bear.”

“You guys have no faith in yourselves,” JJ pushes himself to stand up, “You just have to do that thing you know where you like…” He widens his stance and stretches his arms up high, beer still held in one of his hands, “And then you just sort of-“

“JJ you couldn’t beat a bear in a fight!” Kie interjects, “You would be dead in seconds.”

“You literally fell out of bed the other day because you thought you felt a fly in your ear!” You point out and all eyes look up to see you.

“When did that happen?” Pope half-laughs, his brows furrowing a little.

“The other day,” You clear your throat, trying to fight back the heat rising to your cheeks, “When we all stayed here. He jumped up and it woke me up, you know, because I was on the couch.”

They seem to believe you for long enough that the conversation diverts, but JJ’s eyes remain on you, a smirk tugging at his lips. You widen your eyes at him quickly but he just smiles at you more, shaking his head and taking a sip of his beer.

~~~

“Well look who can’t be trusted to keep a secret!”

The voice makes you jump back to reality - looking up from where you were sat perched on a wall waiting for that specific voice to arrive. It was the perfect spot, far enough away from the Chalet but close enough that it didn’t take long for you to meet. Today, you’d left first so now were sat waiting for JJ to meet you. When you look up, he is grinning at you, his hair messy over his head.

“I recovered it, actually,” You roll your eyes at him, “I can’t believe I said it, I wasn’t even thinking.”

JJ laughs and comes to stand in front of you, his hands resting on your legs, “I don’t think they suspected anything.”

You shake your head, looking down at him from your position on the wall.

“Ready to go home?” He smiles, stretching out his hands for you to take.

You hop down in front of him and he moves his hands to your waist to catch you, you just stumbling into his chest a little as he steadies you on your feet.

“Hi,” JJ smiles down at you.

“Hi.”

He laces his fingers with yours and the two of you walk down the lane towards your house, one only a short way away from John B’s house. But you’d take the longer way back so that nobody saw the two of you, obviously.

“How long do you think we can keep this up without them knowing?” JJ asks, glancing over his shoulder into the dark as he waits for you to open the door.

“I have no idea,” You shake your head, “But we have to at least try to.”

“Oh yeah this’ll just be boring when everybody knows about it,” JJ jokes, gripping your waist as the front door closes behind you.

He spins you around and you grip onto the front of his t-shirt, pulling him with you, “Boring huh?”

JJ laughs, stumbling to catch up with you as the pair of you tumble into the bedroom.

~~~

The following morning, you wake up to the sound of a phone buzzing repeatedly, stopping momentarily and then ringing again.

“JJ that’s your phone,” You grumble, nudging at his side as he was asleep beside you.

He groans and stretches beside you, his eyes still shut.

“JJ,” You push his arms off you, “Where the hell is your phone?”

He stretches his arms up and lifts the comforter off from both of you, looking underneath. When it’s not there, he stretches an arm over the side of the bed and pats around on the floor, finding his discarded shorts and pulling his phone out of his pocket.

“It’s Pope,” JJ grumbles, swiping to answer the call, “What do you want Pope?”

You can just about hear his words on the other end of the line as he raises his voice, “Where the hell are you? You said you’d help out with my Dad today! I’ve just come by your house and you’re not home.”

JJ looks at you and widens his eyes, mouthing a ‘shit’ before turning back to the phone, “Shit, sorry man, I completely forgot. I-“

He pauses and looks around the room as if an excuse is going to pop up out of nowhere.

“I hooked up with this girl last night who’s here on holiday,” He grimaces at the lie, “I just lost track of time and she’s still asleep and I can’t get out.”

“You’re an idiot,” Pope returns, lessening in his stress on the other end of the phone, “Just get here when you can, my Dad’s stressed as hell.”

“I got you, I’ll be there as soon as I can,” JJ nods, “I’ll leave now.”

“Oh, and Kie asked if you’d heard from (Y/N),” Pope cuts in quickly, “Apparently she’s texted her a bunch this morning but hasn’t heard anything.”

JJ looks at you and gestures towards your phone, “No, I haven’t spoken to her. I’ll let you know if I hear anything.”

They hang up shortly after and you glance over the texts from Kie in your phone - one asking you to call her to give her an excuse to leave home, another saying the surf was good so the two of you should go out, another saying that she’d be worried if she didn’t hear from you by twelve because you’re always up early.

“God they don’t make it easy to avoid them,” JJ jokes, pushing his arm underneath you to pull you into him, “I’m sure they can wait five more minutes.”

“Five minutes? Pope sounded like he was about to blow a blood vessel if you kept him waiting any longer.”

JJ laughs and pulls you over so that you’re on top of him, dipping his head to kiss your neck, “He can wait fifteen, twenty, maybe thirty minutes…”

~~~

By the end of the day, the group of you are all on the boat out on the water. The sun’s setting, the water is flat, and it’s only you guys for as far as you can see. You and Kie are leaning against one side of the boat as she rolls a blunt up between her fingers, the boys sat opposite you.

“So JJ, tell us about this girl,” Pope encourages, nudging his friend in the side.

“Wh- what girl?” JJ clears his throat, shifting in his seat.

“The girl you were with this morning,” Pope frowns, “How did you even meet her? We were at John B’s until at least twelve.”

JJ shifts again, “Yeah, well, I just met her on my way home, we got talking, what else do you need to know?”

“There was someone on vacation in the cut?” John B scoffs, “Was she lost?”

“No-“ JJ flushes red, “No it was just-“

“Are you hiding something from us Jayj?” Kie raises her brows, sitting forward a little, “There’s something you’re not telling us. Who is this girl?”

He moves again in his seat and scratches the back of his neck, “Cut it out, you weirdos. I don’t have to tell you anything, so stop asking.”

The three of them all exchanges looks between each other and you but you just shrug your shoulders as if dismissing the topic. And, eventually, they dismiss it too, all looking at him a little more suspiciously than before. You drink a few more drink, pass around the blunt from Kie and try to convince Pope that one puff wouldn’t do anything to him. It’s still a warm evening when the sun has set and so you and Kie convince the boys to dive into the water with you.

You strip down to your bikini and catch eyes with JJ as he watches you, his gaze trailing up and down your body. He notices you looking at him and his cheeks go red, a smirk hovering over his lips. With that, you step onto the edge of the boat and dive over, your arms stretching in front of you to hit the water first, driving you underneath the surface. When you come up, Kie and John B have jumped in too, John B shaking the water from his hair so that it sprays in every direction.

“Come on guys, don’t be boring,” You encourage, paddling with your arms to push yourself back in the water, looking up and Pope and JJ on the deck.

JJ looks down at you and smirks, like he is watching the way you move, diving in close to you so that the water splashes in your direction. You drag your hands over your hair to pull it away from your face, stretching your neck up as you do.

“Holy shit (Y/N) what’s that?” Kie exclaims, grabbing your wrist before you can move it or cover anything.

Hers, and the boys’, eyes are all focused on the purple blotchy patch on your neck - a mark courtesy of JJ from the night before, or from this morning, you couldn’t remember which one.

“I did-“ You pause, “It’s nothing.”

“That’s not nothing, that’s a hickey!” Kie laughs, “Who are you not telling us about?”

“Nobody! Nothing!” You shake your head, pulling your hair back around to the front of your shoulders so that it covers the mark again, “You guys are way too nosey today.”

“Yeah at least someone agrees with me,” JJ scoffs, “Seriously guys, leave her alone.”

Pope looks and JJ and frowns, “Are you kidding? You’d normally be straight on this, why wouldn’t you want to know who this guy is?”

JJ shrugs, “Well, if you ask (Y/N) about her guy you’re going to want to know about my girl so it’s not worth it. Leave it out, virgins. Find your own people to be interested in.”

They make a few more comments about how you two were just as bad as each other, and Pope makes a joke about how it’s like their parents are both having affairs at the same time, and John B reminds them that JJ and you would likely be the most unconventional parents ever. But, thankfully, it relieves their attention away from you.

You all swim for a while as the sky darkens, illuminating with stars overhead as the sun disappears. Eventually, Pope, Kie and John B each end up back on the boat, all three of them laying down to stare up at the stars. Pope points out constellations and Kiara tells him when he’s wrong. JJ swims over to you from behind, where the two of you are close to the boat, and wraps his arms around you.

“JJ,” You hiss, glancing up to make sure you’re hidden under the stretch of the boat deck pointing out over the top of you.

“Shhhh,” He mumbles, his head dipping to your ear, breath fanning hot over your skin, “They’re not looking.”

JJ moves to your neck and shoulder and kisses the skin, and you find yourself leaning into his touch.

“I’ve missed you today,” His words are practically inaudible, so close to your skin that you’re certain he would mark them into you if he could.

You bring up a hand and run it through his hair, wet under your touch as you hum in agreement, “Tonight?”

“Tonight,” He smirks, kissing your skin once again before pulling away, “Alright, fuckers, I’m getting cold, let’s get going.”

Eventually, all of you end up back at Kie’s after she says that her parents are out. JJ makes a short attempt at coming up with an excuse but it is dismissed quickly when they say he never has other plans without them. So you and him reluctantly agree to go with the rest of the group, and now you’re all sat sprawled across the couches with a film on that you weren’t exactly paying attention to. JJ was sat next to you on the two-person couch as the other three were on the bigger couch adjacent. Kie reaches back and pulls a blanket from the back of the sofa, putting it over the three of them, and JJ takes it as opportunity to do the same, his hand resting on your thigh as soon as the blanket is over both of you. You look at him with raised eyebrows but he is yet to tear his eyes away from the screen, though a smirk now covers his lips. You place your hand over his but don’t make any effort to move it. He runs his thumb over the skin, like it felt so comfortable to have you under his touch.

The other three are completely oblivious, caught up in the film and their growing fatigue. You wonder now what they’d really think, if they saw you together, if they knew you were the ones occupying so much of each others’ time. If they knew how much of a secret this whole thing had been - would they laugh and tell you that it was stupid for you to ever hide it? But it wasn’t worth the risk, was it?

“Hey,” JJ squeezes your thigh lightly, “Should we get going?”

You nod tiredly and fight the urge to rest your head on his shoulder.

“I think we’re going to head home,” JJ comments to the other three, “Well, I’ll walk (Y/N) home and then I’ll go to mine, obviously.”

John B frowns at his friend, “I can walk (Y/N) home, she’s closer to my place anyway.”

“Nah, that’s okay, I like the walk,” JJ smiles, standing up and stretching his arms back, “It’s not far.”

The other three exchange glances between each other before Kie says, “Why are you being so weird recently?”

“Weird? We’re not being weird. You’re weird,” JJ shakes his head, stopping himself by chewing the inside of his cheek.

“Right… because that wasn’t weird,” Pope returns, looking at JJ as if some kind of alien was stood in front of him, “Seriously, man, are you ill or something?”

“We’re going now,” You encourage, “See you guys tomorrow.”

You know they’re talking about you as you go, questioning what the hell was going on. But you don’t care to think about it for too long. JJ’s hand finds yours as soon as you turn the corner out of Kie’s driveway and he squeezes some reassurance back to you - whether they knew or not, this wasn’t going anywhere.

~~~

The following morning, you and JJ wake up to no alarm, stay in bed until eleven, eventually bicker over who was going to make breakfast until you realise that you actually didn’t have any food in the house. He grumbles and groans before finally agreeing to go to the shop for you, telling you he’d go if you agreed to cook. You settle on the agreement and he tugs on his clothes to change, half of his belongings now migrating to your house since he spent so much time here.

“Alright I’ll be back in twenty minutes babe I-“ JJ’s voice cuts off instantly as he opens the front door.

He’s met with the sight of John B, Pope and Kiara all sat on your porch, looking up at him with the same ‘explain yourself’ expressions on their faces.

“Um, (Y/N)?” He calls back his hand settling on the door like he’s still deciding between stepping outside or just shutting the door and never coming out again.

“What did you forget your-“ You pause too as soon as you see them, your eyes glowing with the same panic that his did.

“Alright,” John B folds his arms over his chest, “I think you guys have some stuff you need to tell us, you know, just a few things.”

“Yeah, you know, it’s funny actually,” JJ lets out a half laugh and scratches the back of his neck, “So I walked (Y/N) home last night and then I went to go back to mine but I actually ended up staying, no reason really, well, there was obviously a reason, why wouldn’t there be a reason? And that reason was that-“

“Because we’ve been seeing each other,” You interject, releasing a breath you didn’t realise you’d been holding.

He glances down at you like he’s misheard, incapable of hiding the smile that starts to grow on his features.

“You two have-“ Kie gestures between the two of you, “Are you serious?”

JJ looks at you again and grins, turning back to the group, “Yeah, um, for a couple months now.”

“Fucking hell,” John B laughs.

“So that’s why you’ve been so happy,” Pope hits JJ’s arm, “It’s because of (Y/N).”

JJ smiles and glances down at Pope, pressing his tongue to the inside of his bottom lip to stop himself from smiling so widely, “Yeah, yeah, it is.”

“You know you guys are stupid, right?” Kie stands up, “You could’ve told us!”

She hugs you tightly, whispering in your ear that she was happy for you before squeezing JJ’s shoulder.

“Yeah, seriously, you didn’t need to keep it a secret for months,” John B shakes his head, “We came up with much worse theories about what was going on.”

“I don’t think I want to know those theories,” You laugh and JJ reaches out an arm for you to tuck yourself into his side, his hand dropping to rest around your waist.

“Well, I’m glad that’s cleared up,” Pope smiles, “But, whilst we were eavesdropping, I heard something about breakfast?”

[ms-demeanor]

I went diabetic earlier this year, since then I've had far more serious health concerns to really focus on it. I've listened to my primary care and reduced my average a1c from 13 to 7. I've recently been looking into diets and what not that are the best. Currently, I'm trying to cut out all carbs, on my doctor's orders. What I'm seeing though is that a plant based diet is best. It looks like a ketogenic diet is what my doctor wants me to follow? I've watched videos on both diets and I don't know, I agree with you that keto is evil. What are your thoughts about this?

I am not a medical professional so i can't give you medical advice, but I'd say that you should ask your doctor for a referral to a dietician (an RD or an RDN, NOT a "nutritionist" - RD/RDN are protected terms that mean they have completed specific training and have specific board certification) and ask the dietician for advice on your specific dietary needs for your specific medical conditions.

What I can say is that trying to cut all carbs is pretty dangerous - not only is it a macronutrient that our body uses as the most available fuel for your body processes (we *can* get fuel from protein and fat, and ketones can *theoretically* replace sugars for energy but nobody is actually sure how long our bodies can do that and we know it's a LOT less efficient, it's supposed to be less efficient, and what that means is it makes a lot of people feel exhausted when they try it because they literally have less available energy) but also there are certain nutrients that are fortified in the US that are going to be hard to get if you're cutting carbs completely. The example that I always use is folate, because when I had to cut wheat out of my diet (i have grain allergies and celiac disease) I didn't know to supplement it and ended up with a form of anemia and stuff like "fainting" and "dizziness" and "low oxygen saturation."

Which is part of why massive diet changes should be undertaken with the assistance of a dietician! That's why I started studying nutrition! Because nobody supervised my medically necessary diet changes and it went very poorly!

Your GP very likely doesn't have a ton of training on nutrition, and is even less likely to have training on nutrition specific to your condition. If your GP is telling you to cut all carbs, they are telling you to do something dangerous and not nutritionally sound (even really restrictive keto diets call for 20g of carbs a day). Ask either them or your endocrinologist for a referral to a dietician (again, you are looking for a Registered Dietician or a Registered Dietician Nutritionist, RD or RDN, NOT just 'nutritionist') who is familiar with helping diabetics manage their nutrition.

Now, all of that said, in the choice between two fairly restrictive diets I will always say to try the one that requires less effort. It is much easier to eat a plant-based diet long term than a keto diet, and it is vanishingly unlikely that you are going to end up protein deficient (the primary concern for most people who are starting plant based diets, and it's just not all that likely - we need a lot less protein than a lot of people seem to think; though if you're going completely vegan you do need to be careful to supplement your B vitamins and to ensure that you're getting plenty of omega fats)

Because the thing is, for a diet to "work" you have to be on that diet forever. If you stop being on that diet, and stop adhering to its restrictions, whatever benefits exist for that diet go away. So the best diet for *anybody* is one that will provide them with the nutrients they need in a way that they can access regularly and affordably, that they enjoy eating and can comfortably maintain for long periods of time, and that includes a variety of fruits and vegetables because the only diet advice that is nearly universally applicable is that people should be eating more fruits and vegetables and they should be eating a wider variety of them.

I am not a fan of "diets" as a concept and I think that people should think of nutrition in terms of "my diet" not "the diet that is meant to be one-size-fits-all for millions of people that I am attempting." Your diet is what you eat and drink, and that is what you should be looking at adjusting. If you want to reduce carbs in your diet it's better to tweak your consumption than it is totally replace your diet with a one size fits all keto diet. If you want to increase fat in your diet it is better to tweak your consumption than it is to replace your diet with a one size fits all atkins diet. If you want to go plant based I think it is better to start by adjusting your diet to include more plants and to slowly replace animal based products than by trying a one size fits all vegan diet right out of the gate. You can always (and should!) make adjustments to what you eat as circumstances change and you may end up at a vegan diet or a low carb high fat diet and find that that works for you, but part of the reason that I think nutrition studies on diets are so screwy and hard to pin down is because your body is going to *flip the fuck out* when you change from, say, an average american diet to a study-provided Mediterranean diet for a 12 week experiment. If you drastically change your diet all at once and get good results immediately it's very hard to say if those results will be lasting because your body may just adjust to the "new normal" of your diet six months down the line.

But like seriously if your GP is telling you to cut all carbs you need to see a person who specializes in nutrition, and to prepare for your appointment with that person you should make a list of your goals (for you it sounds like you want to manage your blood sugar levels, reduce a1c, and *ask about* low carbs if that is something that interests you), a list of things you think that you'll have trouble with or that you want to include in your diet because they're important to you (if you really like nuts but have to be on a low fat diet, ask if there's a way to work around that with your needs, for example; if there is a cultural staple that you will find difficult to cut from family meals, TELL THEM THAT), a list of questions that you have about different types of diets, and *VERY IMPORTANTLY* information about your food budget and cooking skills. Be clear about it if you can't cook. Be clear about it if you can't afford certain ingredients.

Anyway. Once again, not medical advice, please speak to a medical professional, good luck.

[rius-cave]

I know quite a lot about prison life for someone who's never been to jail.

The best way to gain power in prison is, ironically, through making deals (like demons in hell). If you keep your word enough, you become known as someone reliable and trustworthy to those that used to have power outside (like mafia bosses).

So, in prison, the most powerful people are (a) The Store Man, (b) bookies, (c) anyone who has connections to the outside, or (d) scholars.

Luci could rise to power from being a scholar or an outside connection. Like someone who could help you get a lawyer to re-examine your case or help you study your own case (there is a surprising number of self-made lawyers who get their law education in prison).

MOST likely though, Luci could be a Store Man: someone who runs a small store in his cell and makes deals (like: for the price of three Ramen noodles, I could get you a pack of cigarettes, but you'll owe me four Ramen next time due to interest). They may seem harmless at first, but they know everyone's debts and will make the rest of your sentence hell if you don't pay up. Plus, they are untouchable because they've anchored themselves as a pillar of the community. They don't even have to hire bodyguards, because the whole prison knows that if anything happens to the Store Man, the small pleasures of the outside world (like candy or nerdy socks or even drugs) will be gone forever. And the amount of brains, business know-how, and client history they have are irreplaceable. Once you lose a Store Man, he's gone. I think he would be known throughout the prison as the guy that can get you a cool rubber duck. It's a little taste of home that you can't get anywhere else that just brings a little spark of joy in such a hopeless place, and all the inmates are absolutely feral for them.

I like the idea that Luci gains power in prison from just being a nice, helpful guy. (Apparently, nice guys do very, very well in prison, as long as they treat everyone with a certain level of kindness and respect. Kinda like what Charlie is trying to to accomplish with the Hotel.)

Holy shit. You have no idea how awesome this is, actually! I really wish I knew more about prisons now tbh LMAO but this actually helps a lot!

I definitely agree with your idea about this being the way that Lucifer gained power! So I think that, taking this into consideration, I think there's three main things that made people respect him and fear him

1: like you said, he is actually a pretty nice dude, he's kind and even tends to respect the most vulnerable in prison. I'd like to think that it's actually thanks to him that the rate of assaults in that prison are so somewhat low. He brings a certain order to the place, and is also in control of the whole "inside economy" so to speak.

2: He is rich, so he actually DOES have incredible power outside of prison. Charlie is able to visit him a lot because he has great lawyers. I'd imagine he is also able to hook up some people with lawyers and reduce their sentences a little bit.

3: he is actually REALLY strong, and maybe most of the inmates have never witnessed it with their own two eyes, and not a lot of people really know why everyone fears him, but there are rumors going around that Lucifer is there because he killed 10 people on his own, cold-blooded. This is of course, an exaggeration, he only killed 1 person and it was to protect his daughter, but it the rumor got out of his hands and he doesn't care to correct it. It is especially believable because of that one time Lucifer sent an inmate to the hospital for 6 months for having made a... Let's say, poor in taste comment about Charlie. Nobody saw that guy again.

Lastly, that one DEFINITELY sounds like Angel! We know Angel is hyper sexual, but he IS also part of a mafia family (which is why he's in prison) so he'd definitely have those kinds of tricks up his sleeve!

[flower-boi16]

sorry for the incoming rant.

(cw for: mainly arophobia but also mentions of acephobia and mentions of people shipping an abuser with their victim)

praying for the teens and pre teens who think hazbin is *the* show for queer rep or progressive in any matter. it scares me immensely. not only the blatant fetishism and sex negativity and whatnot, but the fact people are being taught that labels *don't mean anything* and that they can do whatever they want (with a character).

yeah, "i gave my characters labels but fuck those labels ship whatever you want" is SURELY a great sentiment to leave behind. surely nobody would erase or discriminate against labels and identity, right? surely people WOULDN'T repsect labels and identities, right?*COUGH* *COUGH*

seriously the amount of ace- but more aro-phobia in that cult/clusterfuck in that fandom is insane. i hate how the aro tag has been poisoned/infiltrated by red twink no. 45 because of shipping discourse, and these people are being enabled by their "leader", never being lectured correctly. these people will ONLY listen to anyone who either agrees with them or isn't part of said label/identity. im so pissed. aros have little to none rep AT ALL and even then people will erase existing rep or come up with shitty excuses (if i hear the phrase "b-but aros can still date!!" one more time im breaking something. you dont care about the AROMANTIC dating experience, you only care about your stickmen kissing. period.). its more than exhausting.

i am not the only aro and aro-ace severly pissed off by this but im afraid there's nothing we can do. these people ship a severly traumatized victim and their assaulter together so im not suprised. at all.

all i came to know is that nobody actually fucking cares about representation or labels- they're all hopping around in fanfiction-shipping wonderland and bullying people relentlessly if they DARE to think otherwise. and they're being enabled.

-an exhausted and "done" aromantic. (i'm also on the ace spectrum but that's not as important to me right now- even though striker- the only one that's not horny 24/7 and clearly sex-repulsed or at least disgusted, is played as a big joke, but i believe someone else already said that. but that alone should raise eyebrows.)

Honestly, I don't even know what to add other than...this fandom kinda sucks. Like first bullying someone into killing themselves over shipping stuff and now this? And the fact that Viv doesn't call out ANY of this shit at all makes it worse.

Look, I'm of the opinion that we should not blame a creator for having a shitty fandom, HOWEVER, Viv needs to stop enabling her fans and say SOMETHING about this behavior.....but she isn't. Like, she could just say "hey guys stop doing this pls" buuuuut no. She's too busy whining about people criticizing her shows to actually do that.

Alastor is aroace guys, stop trying to erase that part of him just so you can drool over him. Just do that for LITTERALY ANY OTHER CHARACTER. It's that simple.

[overwatch]

I played D&D yesterday at a board game store and I am still a bit shook from it. This isn't a D&D horror story but there's a few things I need to vent about.

- the DM who we did not know handed us character sheets. Apparently this had been agreed with the guy from my group who was arranging everything but he forgot to tell everyone?

- I never related more to a drag queen who gets the role on a ruchallenge they hate. I was forced to play a low charisma wizard whose whole thing was being religious. I did rly good and moved the plot along despite this horrible character, I killed it.

- Anyway straight men are animals they immediately go "IM ROGUE" "IM BARBARIAN". They don't even read the character description or backstory. Or ask me and the other girl in the group if we wanted to read the roles first??

- nobody was doing character voice 🫠 "he says x" "he asks why"-- I interrupted the other players to speak like the characters and they were just stuborn. Especially the straight men they barely used dialogue they only wanted to fight?

- one of the things I HATED the most was that I got a crystal (important plot device) and one of the straights says a) he wants to break it. I start *discussing* with the group that I don't think that's a good choice. B) suddenly the guy says "I take the crystal from her and save it on my things."

????

- me and the group and still discussing what to do with the crystal but the guy decides he takes it and doesn't need to roll or interact/ask me. He then triggers a boss to appear who wants the crystal.

- Before we can discuss as a group why we should give him the crystal the same guy throws the crustal at the guy??

- The DM who had obviously put some effort into describing the boss and voice for the boss just goes ok. I guess he leaves with the crystal then.

- the same guy says he wants to fight the boss. Not for the crystal. Just because he wants ti fight.

- I see the horror flash on the DMs eyes. This is obviously a very high level boss to fight later in the campaign. He even goes "are you sure..?" I save it by saying no obviously not. We already lost the crystal let's not get killed too. Dm says "good choice".

- playing in a boardgame store is horrible. There's so much noise. I have adhd and oh my god. Also dm said something rly serious to my character and I couldn't understand him and didn't wanna ask him to repeat himself bc he did character voice and it was a tense moment.

- straight men's characters kept trying to "go investigate on their own". Boy we just started the campaign??? Maybe idk we should stick together. One of them kept "I go way ahead of them" or "I go way in the back". Which triggered events without us being there yet. At some point the DM ignored the guy and just spoke like he was there with us too.

- I was the only one (aside from dm) actually roleplaying and doing voices.

- one of the guys was mad the dm didn't let him use his own figure on the map even though it was three times the size of the figures the dm had for us.

- I am 100% sure the men were angry I was the hero of the battle we had. (It was bush like creatures and I used burning hands... They were all upset at the dm when the attacks they used barely did anything. And I mean actually arguing.

Anyway I just to take this out of my chest. They also kept asking for feedback/compliments on WhatsApp and I was nice and said I rly liked meeting with them and the dm was way better than I had imaged. And the guy that stole my crystal without asking and almost ruined the game an off comment about me being "uncomfortable" because I didn't join them for dinner after (worded like an accusation)? 🫠 And didn't even say anything about me carrying the game and helping him with his fuck ups. But ok.

[ramblers-lets-get-ramblin]

Unwind- Dieter Bravo x f!reader

Main Masterlist

Summary: Dieter helps you unwind when you get your period after an already long day.

Rating: Let’s say M to be safe. As always, my entire blog is 18+. MDNI

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: established relationship, reader menstruates, drug use (marijuana), reference to past drug use, reference to bad horror movies, Dieter being our favorite trash panda, sweet, fluffy, domesticity

Immersability: reader is able-bodied

Author’s Notes: nobody asked for this but ya girl is going through it right now and I needed this. This is very self indulgent.

The last two weeks have been literally from hell. One of your employees quit so your department is down to you, the department head, and someone so incompetent you usually have to redo all of her work. And your boss has decided to become all “hands-on” all of a sudden, in the most unhelpful ways known to man. Considering he’s never actually done your job, he sure does act like he knows the ins and outs of it well enough to tell you that you’re doing it wrong.

 “I swear, if he says one more word to me, I’m gonna quit.” You tell Az, your direct superior, and best friend. 

“You wouldn’t do that to me.” They laugh. You know they are right, but goddamn, Don pisses you off. Your back has been killing you all morning and every little thing seems to set you off. You cried at fucking meme earlier. Sure, it was the cutest dog you’ve ever seen in your life, but come on. As you gather your belongings to leave for the day, you feel a warm gush between your legs. You turn around and head to the bathroom. Well, that explains a lot, you think as you see the red bloom across your underwear.

You stop at the gas station to buy a single packet of Midol and a Red Bull to wash it down. You chug the Red Bull and swallow the pills and put on your playlist titled ‘Sad Girl Hours.’ You like to lean into the emotions.  You feel a sharp stab streak across your abdomen. You curse and hope the Midol kicks in soon. You kind of wish you had something stronger. But you and Dee had agreed to lay off the hard stuff from now on. You wish he was home, but he said there were a few last minute rewrites that would extend the shoot for a few days. You pull into the driveway and leave everything nonessential in the car, you can come back for it later, when you feel less like you’re being gutted from the inside. You stick your key in the lock but pause when you hear sounds from inside. Lou Reed’s voice crackles from the speakers. Tears sting your eyes. Only one person would be listening to a bootleg of The Ludlow Street demo tape, from the earliest days of what would eventually become The Velvet Underground. There aren't many people who could both afford it and appreciate it. 

“Baby?” You call as you close the front door behind you. You throw all of your shit on the ground by the door and kick off your shoes. Your hand goes under your shirt and behind your back. You unhook your bra and pull the straps through the sleeves of your shirt, one at a time. You fling the thing over your shoulder, not caring where it lands as you make your way down the hall. He’s in his studio but he can’t hear you over the music. He has speakers in every room, all connected to the same sound system. You lean up against the doorframe and just watch him for a moment. He never looks as peaceful as he does when he paints. He’s wearing his favorite green robe, and his favorite Crocs. His back is to you, he moves the easel around the room while he paints to best capture the light. You can just see the top strip of the canvas. Blades of grass is all you can make out. You’re just glad to see that it’s not the black, bleak, soul-shredding images that he was partial to during the height of your drug use. You lift your hand to the door and softly rap your knuckles against it, loud enough to be heard, but not loud enough to scare him. 

Dieter turns around and immediately drops his paintbrush to the floor. He’s only wearing boxers beneath his robe. “Baby! You’re home!” He rushes over to you, not caring that he’s tracking paint all over the floor. He pauses the music on his way. He wipes his hands on his robe and wraps his arms around you. 

“You’re home early.” You say into his chest, where you rest your head. 

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I- I kinda lied. About the rewrites.” You look up at him and he smiles sheepishly. “I know you’ve been having a hard time at work and I wanted to surprise you.” You can’t hold the tears back anymore. Full on ugly sobs. You bury your head in his chest and cry. “Hey, hey, I’m sorry, baby. I thought you would like it.” He says, rubbing his hands up and down your back. “I can fuck off for a few more days if you want.” You laugh and pull your head back up. He wipes the snot from your nose with the sleeve of his robe. 

“I’m sorry, Dee. I’ve just had a shit day and I got my period so now I feel like shit, too.” You tell him. You stretch your head to his and give him a kiss. “I’m really glad you lied to me. I was wishing you were gonna be here the whole drive home.” He gives you another kiss on your lips and then one on your forehead.

“Well, your wish came true. And now I’m gonna take care of you. Come on.” He grabs your hand and drags you further into the house. You get a peek at the canvas before you’re pulled up the stairs by Dieter. Two forms tangled together in grass. A scene you recognize well. It's from your favorite place in the backyard. Where you and Dieter like to lay on a blanket, get high, and look at the stars. Sometimes you both get a little too into it. You simultaneously hope nobody ever sees the painting and wish it would hang in the front room of the house. Not that you want to subject everyone to the image of Dieter fucking you in the grass. But it's so goddamn beautiful you think everyone should see it once before they die.

“Sit.” He orders with a snap and a point to the bed. You sit on the edge of the bed and watch him flit around the room. He sifts through your dresser drawers, and then his own. His arms are full of clothes as he dips into the attached bathroom. You hear water running and lay back on the bed. The door opens a moment later and Dieter reappears fully dressed. "Come here, baby" you follow him into the bathroom and he begins pulling at your clothes. 

"Dee, did you get dressed just so I could rip your clothes off?" You ask while he pulls your shirt over your head.

 "Shut up." He laughs. He remembers doing that once, after a particularly long shoot. 5 months in Eastern Europe. Your schedules only lined up for a visit once. It wasn't even worth it in the end. The movie was a flop, commercially and critically. Dieter loved the script, though. If the director had been worried about anything other than a potential Oscar nom, they could have made something really special. 

Once he’s striped you bare, he points to the tub. It's already full of bubbles and water, the smell of eucalyptus and the steam rising from the tub draw you in. He holds your hand as you step into the jacuzzi tub that takes up a good chunk of the bathroom. The bathroom that’s bigger than the entire bedroom in your last apartment, by a lot. He lets go once you’ve settled into the water to hand you a bath pillow. The heat instantly begins to sap the stress and stiffens from your body. You make an appreciative moan. Dieter holds up his hands, a remote in each one. “Music or TV?” He asks. 

“TV, please.” He turns and aims the remote at the wall mounted TV. He scrolls through the apps until he finds Disney+. You smile while he searches for your comfort show. 

“I’ll be back. Stay here for at least an episode. Maybe an episode and a half.” His eyes look up to the ceiling  while he tries to calculate how much time he’ll need. “Yeah, that should be good.” He nods. He turns to leave but stops when you call his name.

 “Thank you for this.” You say quietly, on the verge of tears again.

 “You ain’t seen nothing yet, baby.” He says with a wink. 

After a full episode of The Mandalorian and half of another, the water has gotten tepid and your fingers are all pruney and the bubbles are all gone. You stand in the tub and open the drain. You step out of the tub, thankful that Dieter insisted on having the floor in here carpeted, and pad over to the vanity. He’s left your favorite pair of sweatpants and his well worn Fleetwood Mac shirt for you to put on, along with the ugliest socks you own. You won't get rid of them because they are fuzzy and cozy and the most comfortable socks you’ve ever worn. You slip your feet into your Crocs that match his. “We’ll look so cute.” He had argued when you told him that Crocs are ugly and you wouldn’t be caught dead wearing those ‘clown shoes.” Who’s the clown, now? You think with a laugh. You’ve never been able to resist him when he hits you with the puppy dog eyes.

You pad down the stairs and into the living room, where you hear Dee shuffling around. Your eyes go wide when you see that the couches and coffee table have all been shoved to one side of the room. “What are you up to?” You ask, eyeing the pile of what looks like every blanket and pillow in the house.

 “Come on! Get in!” He pats the pile. He’s already back out of his clothes. Boxers and trusty robe the only thing he’s wearing. You side eye him a bit and flop down. Fluffy and soft, it feels like a warm hug. Dieter tosses your favorite blanket over you and walks into the kitchen. He emerges with three bags that are so full you’re surprised they haven’t busted. 

“What is all this, Dee?” You ask when he drops them near your feet. 

“Snacks.” He says matter-of- factly. He climbs into the mountain behind you. His thighs bracket your body and he pulls you back into his chest. He reaches into the pocket of his robe and pulls out the remote, a joint, and a lighter. He lights the joint and hands it to you. “For your cramps, babe.” He starts the movie and you feel a little pissed that your eyes water again. Goddamn hormones , you think. Shitty horror movies are your favorite. And Feast is one of the cheesiest, bad-but-in-a-good-way, shitty movies ever. And there’s two of them. He wraps his arm around your body. He settles his hand on your lower abdomen. His big, warm palm helps better than any heating pad ever could. You pass the joint back to him. “Good?” He asks. You clear your throat before you answer. 

“Very good. Thank you, Dee.” Your voice is thick from the smoke and the tears that you absolutely prohibit to fall from your eyes. 

“I love you, baby.” He says before he captures your lips in a warm kiss. 

You watch shitty movies, eat shitty food and smoke excellent weed until you both fall asleep. You finally get a good night's rest, you never sleep well when he’s away. You don’t even mind that he clings to you in his sleep like a koala, or that his body is like a furnace when he’s asleep. When you wake in the morning, his body still curled around yours, you stroke his head and thank your lucky stars that you found each other. 

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[jaxypaxyhaxy]

You said we don't want to hear your essay about the symbolism in this picture, and actually, I wanna hear it.

(Omg literally marry me 🥹 nobody ever cares or like wants to hear my symbolism rants🥹🫶)

After it wrote this: just letting yall know, I’m sorry, you asked for this, you’ve brought this on yourself. Much love, I apologize

Ok so I’m gunna break it down by the most obvious to least obvious (at least to me)

1) the “APPEAR”

Ok ok ok, so we all know this is something Tori does around Charlie often. Yk, “older sister magic”? Yeah so I think there could be like 2 things going on here. A) Micheal has been able to appear the whole time, Or B) Micheal has picked up this trait from Tori. If the former is true and Micheal has been able to appear the whole time, like how can you tell me they aren’t perfect for eachother. Not even necessarily romantically either but like they are soulmates. I think the original appear of Tori symbolizes how people don’t always notice when she enters a room. Like there are people who have all eyes on them, and then there’s Tori who you might not even know is there because of how she enters a room. Idk I just think it’s a good way to describe her, a silent entrance. BUT if the latter is true, and Micheal picked up this trait from Tori, hoo boy like I could literally talk abt this for an hour. Ok ok so I think I present a good argument abt how Tori and Micheal both kinda want what the other has (at least at the start) if that makes any sense. Like Tori is this “manically depressed psychopath” who doesn’t seem to give a single shit about what others think or feel or dislike about her ( granted it’s because she’s too busy struggling to keep herself alive and worrying about her siblings but still she just doesn’t seem to give a single flying fuck ). But as all my solitaire girlies know, Micheal gets extremely angry at times because of his performance on the ice and how he’s perceived by other people (like judges definitely). I think it almost seems like Micheal cares so much about how he’s perceived, and what others feel about him, or what other people have to say about him. I think (at least it feels a bit like this to me) that Micheal aspires to have Tori’s level of IDGAF and he kind of analyzes and watches her and how she is just herself. ( And like obviously we know Tori’s life is extremely fucked up and depressing and I think we can all agree we would just like to comfort her endlessly, so I’m not saying Micheal romanticizes her life and wants it and wishes it was his, but I think that’s part of what caught his eye abt her at the beginning. ) that took a really long time to get to my point but like yeah I think if he did pick it up from her is because he (not in a creepy way) watched her and how she moves through everyday life. Like HE PAYS ATTENTION! He pays attention to her and has continued to pay attention even more so after the events of the book because he cares about her and loves her.

2) the lines showing how he appears

Ok so we all know that Tori appears like this:

But Micheal is much more animated in his appearance, with longer lines and no asterisks. This is true and translates nicely into their individual personalities as well. 1 way is Tori appears like she wasn’t there but then she was, and Micheal appears like he popped up from the ground. I’m gunna break down my other point because it’s a lot.

Their emotions ( including breakdowns and general expression ): ok, so Tori often has an array of emotions and feelings and thoughts all spinning in her head at once (I could talk more abt this so just lmk if u want me to) and it makes it harder at least for me the reader to designer her feelings from time to time yk? But like Micheal, his emotions are intelligible in the book and you can usually put a name or two to what he’s feeling whether it’s hurt or anger yk? I kinda look at it like

Tori: small, silent symbol ( as she doesn’t often talk about her feelings with many ppl ) and many lines that represent her emotion soup. ( each line representing one emotion yk? )

Micheal: long, obvious, concise lines. ( he is emotionally intelligent enough to know what he’s feeling but not necessarily control or understand them ) like Tori each line represents one emotion but also Micheal’s are much larger and obvious. I believe live this can represent his struggle to control and maintain his feelings. I also just wanna say I believe the two long lines represent his anxiety about posing his question, and being angry or upset about the whether society puts on dating (as mentioned in he’s rant to Charlie’s gang) and I think the smaller lines are like part happy or excited almost because like hes at a super fun event with the girl he really likes, and people who are super nice to him; and the other small line I think is sadness because (as previously mentioned) Micheal doesn’t seem to handle rejection well but he also doesn’t have meant friends and he would be so so so sad if he messed it up with Tori the one girl who actually got him and cares about him yk? Idk that’s just my over analysis of the way he appeared.

3) his hair

His hair is scruffy and messy, and I’ve seen Alice draw hair like messier when someone is anxious or upset abt something so I just wanted to put that out there

4) Charlie and Tao

I WANAN FOCUS SPECIFICALLY ON TAO FOR A MINUTE THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Okay look at Taos face!! ( I know ur not gunna scroll all the way back up so I’ll help )

Alr anyways LOOK AT HIM. THE UTTER SKEPTICISM IN HIS EXPRESSION IS JUST SO AHHAHHAHAHHHHHHHH

(This is my head canons and over analyzing just kinda mushed into a pie abt why I think this has so much weight so bear with me) The reason I am absolutely feral about this is because Tao has known Charlie (and inevitably Tori) for years on years on years like he is THE childhood best friend and I have an array of pictures in my head what happened after solitaire. Charlie 100% had a panic attack, no question. I would too, I think anyone would if their older sister tried to kill themselves honestly. But anyways I think Nick helped but Tao helped much more in that certain scenario. I’m not sure exactly when Charlie talks to Tao after the events of solitaire but he definitely does and he blames himself for not noticing sooner she was depressed or suicidal. Tao kinda convinces him there’s not much you can do in those situations and sometimes we don’t recognize it in time if we recognize it at all. But basically long story short Tao knows about everything with Tori and Micheal on the roof. That’s what that was leading up to sry. Ok BUT where I’m going with this is that just like Tao was protective over Charlie with Nick, he is 1000% just as protective over Tori (bc she’s like his platonic older sister in law) so he will occasionally watch Micheal and make sure he’s being good like he did with Nick.

There’s also the very real possibility I’m reading much to far into this and he’s just confused because Micheal appeared and bumped into him BUT STILL, I’m gunna choose to live in delusion

Charlie: Hes visibly confused and I just know in my bones it’s because he doesn’t know why Micheal is with them instead of hanging with Tori and Ollie. That’s it, that’s all I wanted to say abt Charlie bc I just find that rly fucking cute

That’s all I think… for now at least. Much love, hope you enjoyed 🫶🫶

[graspingremlinhands]

So @milk-powrit asked me to draft why I didn't like GxK, to which I decide to oblige.

DISCLAIMER: Those are my personal opinions; of a fan of Monsterverse since 2014 and a nobody with any competence in analyzing media, save some common sense and maybe rudimentals??

Also I already hugely disliked Godzilla vs Kong so my discontent had a part in how I enjoyed the movie.

To conclude English is not my first langauge and even in my langauge, debate is not one of my strenght.

Spoilers alert; so skip or I kindly suggest to block the tag: Godzilla x Kong spoiler.

Let's start with the first thing: I don't enjoy how the tone of the movie shifted so drastically from Kotm to GvsK.

In this post, a youtube user explained better than me why the shifting tone felt like a downgrade. If in Godzilla (2014) Godzilla was introduced by hearing his foot stomping on the ground. It was heavy, massive, it reverbered on the glass of the airport. It felt natural, realistic. How a creature that BIG would move in the real world.

As the user said Realistic =/= Seriousness. Godzilla can be goofy. But Monsterverse!Goji was estabilished in a setting, that was the real world.

In both GvsK and in GxK Godzilla does not feels natural. Was necessary for Godzilla to evolve, to be more nimble, when already in GvsK was already moving in a way unnatural?

Or pulling the 0 gravity fight? What purpose had the evolution, if in the end it was not even necessary. Had really improved his fighting skills? They were the same, on earth and in the hollow earth.

2 reason: I've seen around posts about how media litteracy has gone bad; in some ways about people can no longer sospend their belief and calls anything a plot-hole.

But I think that one thing is suspending the belief but another is the director of the movie making the plot moving from point A to point B without telling the audience how.

For example: Suspension of belief: They had the Beast Glove ready to use, because Monarch was already working on it ✅

But why Jia is the chosen one of the day? How the Iwi in hollow earth knew of Skull island? How the shard to control Shimo works? Why Godzilla would respond to the distress call of the people who fought against him? Why Mothra has a connection to the iwi, in particular. Since in Kong: skull island there's no reference to her? How Jia flew back on Earth with Mothra, without dying for the gravitational pull?.

Not everything has to be the viewer's guess that's what I'm saying.

3 point: Shimo and Skar King are as much wasted potential as it was MechaGodzilla was in GvsK.

Skar is menacing yes, has the ability and dexterity of a formidable foe. He's vile and disgusting, oppressing his clan (let's call it that) and he's even an abusive father. All of these things: but as a villain he's really that dangerous?

He was introduced as this terrible tyrant, a danger to the world. And he wasn't even trying to go on Earth; he went up by accident basically. Because the Iwi had to play with gravity. Or should I believe him, forcing his subordinate moving rocks was to build a staircase to the upside?

And Shimo, sweet girl. She looks so horrible. Her white scales don't blend in for anything. Like she was photoshopped last minute. Her powers do damage I see. But her being presented as one or The first Titan do actually mean something to the plot, to the character? Or a simple red-herring to made her more interesting than she actually is?

Because at the end of the day SHE IS A PET!!

"Oh Kong now has found a mate, so cute". My brothers on earth, she goes on four, is used as a mount the all time and she kept panting the whole time. That's a pet, the old dog you have to force inside when it snows.

It was pretty disappointing.

Last but not least the reason I personally dislike Wingard take on the Monsterverse, which is the point you could probably throw away all my arguments, compelling or not because it's really a ME issue, who don't think no one'd agree and I don't blame anybody for it.

I HATE HOW WINGARD DECIDED TO PORTRAY GODZILLA.

I don't hold nothing over him for having Kong as his favorite. That's personal taste, I respect it.

But when it comes to at the expense of the other protagonist, it rubs me so in the wrong way.

On this point I don't know if I want to discuss it further, but boy I do have to complain on this topic.

To summarize I'm mad Godzilla doesn't get to have the same introspection and grace is allowed to Kong, knowing he can to (if you read the Dominion comic. But since they are only distributed in the US not many does. OR should care about it. Cause I'm first a supporter of the idea that if a media is not capable to give all the informations in like the Movie, you the audience should not have to pay for more. So basically the Novelitation are cool but also a scam)

That's all I had to say about it.

Hoping any of this uphere is comprehensible. If in the end I only sound like a rambling idiot I accept it. This movie is too stupid to be too mad about it.

I'll just ignore it

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Am I the only one who thinks that Jamil was being a hypocrite in Chapter 6? Man's really told Leona "nobody understands me" and "you don't know what I've been through" when literally every overblot victim has been through shit.

I’m pretty sure that most agree that Jamil’s being a hypocrite. No one has said he wasn’t one. And you know what? I think that was the point. It was written that way on purpose.

None of us fans really seriously wail on Jamil (or on other characters) for being a hypocrite because that kind of behavior is to be expected of him/them. We were told at the very beginning of TWST that NRC’s students are often self-serving and think more of themselves than of others, and that they don’t care to accept help from their peers. It’s unrealistic to think these boys would be better people when not even a full year of time has passed to allow for them to sit and reflect on their actions. Like… it can sometimes take several years’ worth of therapy to come to that realization of, “oh, well maybe I fucked up in that situation or I said something insensitive to person B”.

This is all a normal part of their journies of self-discovery and growth. Of course they’re going to deflect blame and worry about themselves first and foremost. Those aren’t always healthy coping mechanisms by any means, but it’s been made clear time and time again these characters are still works in progress when it comes to thinking beyond just themselves and opening up to others. A large part of Jamil’s hypocrisy, for example, comes from a fixation on his own past instead of stopping to consider the situation Leona may be in. Trauma can box you in and make you feel like you’re alone, like no one can relate to you. Maybe you fee so defeated you already anticipate not being heard out (which is entirely believable for Jamil, who has been talked down to his whole life and told to be servile). Then when you have nothing else to compare to (I doubt Jamil is cognizant of Leona/the other OB boys’ pasts in detail, nor how much he has in common with Leona until they actually had a conversation), of course his own problems are magnified or seem so much worse.

There’s a lot of different psychological factors entangled in this. What’s most important is to not dismiss the hypocrisy, but to understand it as an integral part of a character and their background and personality.

[nightgoodomens]

hi! just wanted to say that i love your blog!!

you actually changed a lot of my opinions on the Final Fifteen and how i had interpreted it before lmao

anyways- sorry that the fandom is pissing you off right now- that’s so valid actually. i love seeing aus and silly headcannons but some people just take things way too far- and if you get in too deep then you’ll forget what the show actually is…

but don’t stop creating!! i’m so happy you’re not planning on leaving 🙏 honestly having you and the others that recognize the insanity helps keep the rest of us sane too- it’s so refreshing seeing your opinions and things that i can agree with because it’s more true to the show :>

Hi! Thank you so much 🥰

This fandom changed a lot recently. I remember when S2 finished we were here creating posts how awesome every scene was, how much we love the characters, they love each other, finding clues, debating what could happen in S3. There was respect for the show, the creator, the actors, the story, and each other. We loved every single scene.

Now you post a compilation of Aziraphale’s heart eyes for Crowley, and a dickhead will add “he made Crowley his B****.” because nobody even remembers the show anymore, their brains are so rotten by fanom where there’s a need to reduce Crowley to nothing and humiliate him even though he did nothing to deserve the labels people are sticking on him, he’s literally the opposite of what the fandom says he is.

You will post “I think this might be the ending.” and you won’t see a debate with “Ohh maybe! Or maybe a little bit more like…” no, you will get “Obviouuuusly not because I AM right and THIS is what’s going to happen”.

You can’t post a funny idea because someone will go “Well OBVIOUSLY not because THIS idea is the only right one.”

You scroll randomly and the dash is filled with generally how Aziraphale is this badass who made Crowley his pet obsessed with him with zero respect for himself, who’s only purpose is running after Aziraphale and being pathetic for him, you will read how Aziraphale doesn’t think they’re an item or cares much really but he knows Crowley is obsessed with him, and you just have to block and leave because what the actual fuck.

What did people watch? Did we see the same show? The one where they’re shown loving each other, where Aziraphale was shown putting himself in trouble just so Crowley would come and rescue him, so they’d have an excuse to see each other and he was so cheerful when he did? Where he is flirty and so happy?

Where he spent whole season 2 looking at Crowley like at a picture and creating a BALL to dance with him, giving up his precious possession for him, so filled with love, meanwhile Crowley showed he cares for him and he will protect him because he loves him too, but he leaves the second Aziraphale pisses him off or doesn’t respect him, basically whole seasons showing they’re in love with each other which means they will do a lot for each other but there is always a line. Crowley is shown to be very independent and being anything but the ugly things people say about him.

Technically if so desperate to call one <list of those things> then they’d need to associate that with Az considering any show of love is <list of those things>. But somehow Crowley follows him once for a moment and gets labelled all the crap, how desperate/dependant/pathetic/slut etc he is, meanwhile Princess-save-me-and-I-will-give-out-my-possessions-for-you-and-try-to-make-you-swoon-with-a-ball-etc-Aziraphale doesn’t get labelled any of that crap and instead gets treated like some badass who owns Crowley. The actual fuck? Did they confuse which one is Az and which one is Crowley? Just so it is clear - I don’t think either deserve these things to be said about them. They’re in love! They’re flirting! They care for each other! That’s what it is, not… eh.

Suddenly Aziraphale isn’t a little flirt who wants to woo Crowley and loves him, wants to be rescued by him, coming up with things to make their love a little fantasy from the book, but still struggles with Heaven. He isn’t terrified of Crowley being destroyed. No, he is a badass who made Crowley his B**** and he will rule the world. Of course it’s meant sexually too, yikes. The fuck? The actual fuck? We are talking about Aziraphale heart eyes please save me Crowley? Aziraphale I’m making a ball so we can confess our love?

Suddenly Crowley isn’t independent, the serpent who introduced free will, strong in his beliefs who loves Aziraphale and hence protects him but walks out, out of respect for himself. No, he’s pathetic and will curl up and die without Aziraphale and just wants to be used and controlled by him. It’s all meant sexually too, yikes. What the fuck!? He’s strong and independent, hates to be controlled, and snaps and protects yet people make him nothing. He literally showed thorough the show and especially at the end that he would never be anybody’s “bitch”.

That’s literally Crowley’s WHOLE thing!

But everywhere it’s all just pathetic/wet/whore/slut/obsessed/bitch. Jesus Christ. Are any scenes bringing joy and heart eyes anymore, because it looks like everything was reduced to nothing. There’s no more “omg they love each other so much” “look at the heart eyes” “omg that’s so romantic” no it is all “obviously this means this one is a whore and this one is his owner” the fuck. “This means they’re fucking, this means this one is a slut, this means he’s a virgin, this means this one is experienced, this means this one is a Dom/Sub…” the fuck, the fuck, the actual fuck.

I need fucking lobotomy.

It’s sad what happened.

Shitting on Crowley and assassinating his character? Making Aziraphale who he isn’t? Totally cool! Posting things that actually associate with canon and don’t reduce characters to nothing or switch their personalities? Ew no.

At this point it is disregarding everything that happened in canon to “prove” something that’s obviously not true. Or latching onto one tiny thing and blowing it out of proportion to “prove” a point while ignoring the 100 things that proved otherwise. Or twisting things so hard it doesn’t even make sense. It’s frustrating.

It’s exhausting.

Sorry for the rant, anon. I used the excuse. I feel better and hope it will make a few others feel better better too 😂 I think I ranted enough that I won’t need to anymore.

Back to posting all the gorgeous stuff!

And creating!

Love ya 💕

[halothenthehorns]

Chapter 2: THE BRONZE DRAGON

Magnus saw that last word and just stopped. Just sat there frozen and looked like he wanted to cry. Why? Why was Percy's life like this?

"Magnus?" Under any other circumstances, Magnus would have been equally confused and delighted why Alex sounded so concerned over him.

"The, Bronze, Dragon," he slowly drug out every word like he was trying to suck the water off of a rock. A very pointless and disgusting task.

"Whatever nice things were said about Hephaestus need to be revoked right now!" Percy agreed with every dreaded line on Magnus's face.

Nico made a little yeep noise as well, his first thought being Bianca leaping into that thing's mouth and making it do the chicken dance as well.

"Please let this be an adventure about you getting shrunk down and fighting an armadillo lizard*," Jason was the only one who sounded excited. Then Percy considered for a moment and even nodded like that could have some fun before Magnus read on in dread before anybody else got crazier ideas.

One dragon can ruin your whole day.

"One dragon can ruin someone's whole life Percy!" Magnus groaned. He begged of the following words to please be something like Peleus with a stomach ache! An actual, made-up bad dream? A very oddly themed birthday party for some kid not cursed by the universe?!

"Surely that's why I'm there, to make it go from one to the other," Percy offered with half-hearted hope of his own he just had to help a dragon egg hatch or something cute and innocent... like his life was ever that easy.

Trust me, as a demigod I've had my share of bad experiences. I've been snapped at, clawed at, blowtorched and poisoned. I've fought single-headed dragons, double-headed, eight-headed, nine-headed and the kind with so many heads that if you stopped to count them you'd be pretty much dead.

"Nobody was ever going to ask you to reminisce about the hydra Percy," Thalia sighed. Why couldn't that have been his worst dragon experience?

"Frankly all that just made me think to ask you, again, how are you alive?" Jason nodded.

"Luck and some mild skill," Percy reminded.

But that time with the bronze dragon? I thought for sure my friends and I were going to end up as Kibbles "n" Dragon Bits.

The evening started simply enough.

"It always does with you," Will nodded without surprise. He alone seemed to have a pretty good idea what this one was about, and aside from rubbing Nico's arm to help chase those shivers away he didn't want to spoil the fun for anyone.

It was the end of June.

"Oh," Percy said in surprise as he did a double take. "This happened, before that thing with Clarisse though! That explains the weird smell!"

Nobody else had a clue what he was talking about, they just all kind of assumed Clraisse smelled like motor oil.

I'd come back from my most recent quest about two weeks before, and life at Camp Half-Blood was returning to normal. Satyrs were chasing the dryads. Monsters howled in the woods. The campers were playing pranks on one another and our camp director, Dionysus, was turning anyone who misbehaved into a shrub. Typical summer-camp stuff.

Magnus stopped cold like he'd been the one turned into a shrub. Which was ridiculous, he didn't have a single leaf on him.

"He turns them back Magnus," Will shrugged.

Magnus counted to ten in his head before deciding against asking for further details.

After dinner, all the campers were hanging out at the dining pavilion. We were all excited because that evening capture the flag was going to be totally vicious.

The night before, Hephaestus's cabin had pulled off a huge upset. They'd captured the flag from Ares – with my help, thank you very much –

"Nobody was thanking you Percy," Thalia scoffed.

"Well maybe more people should," Percy tried to give her big pouty eyes, but it was ruined by everybody laughing to much and he couldn't begin to hold it.

which meant that the Ares cabin would be out for blood. Well... they're always out for blood, but this night especially.

On the blue team were Hephaestus's cabin, Apollo, Hermes and me – the only demigod in Poseidon's cabin. The bad news was that for once Athena and Ares – both war god cabins – were against us on the red team, along with Aphrodite, Dionysus and Demeter. Athena's cabin held the other flag and my friend Annabeth was their captain.

"I need politics and details stat!" Jason turned and pleaded to Percy like he was going to fall on his knees.

Will lit up, clearly all for going into the latest drama that had caused such shifts in dynamics to occur, but Thalia and Percy groaned in sync, quite loudly. Seems as if unless they were the ones running the teams they weren't going to happily sit around and play back who had pranked whom, what revenge was needed, and the height of impressing others.

Jason sighed but reluctantly gave in that could take hours just to get caught up on a week's worth, but gave Will a very obvious look as if book marking him for later.

Annabeth is not somebody you want as an enemy.

"Which is why Percy seems to make a life goal of it!" Alex chuckled with a very pointed gesture at him like they'd missed her target.

"I only aim for the best," Percy puffed his chest up with pride and swooped back his hair.

Thalia smacked him in the stomach, causing him to deflate and the gray strands of hair to fall back in place as she smirked, "in everything except grades."

Right before the game, she strolled up to me. "Hey, Seaweed Brain."

"Will you stop calling me that?"

"I didn't call you anything," Will said innocently.

Only Nico laughed while the others groaned even louder at the terrible pun. Though Magnus ignored them all with interest. That was, in fact, the first time he'd heard Percy wanted her to stop that, and as far as he could tell from the light-hearted smile on his face now and the passive eye-roll, Percy hardly meant it.

She knows I hate that name, mostly because I never have a good comeback.

"The worst atrocity I could name," Alex sighed.

"You should never be brought to a comedy show," Percy said with a hint of dread. She'd heckle anybody and get herself thrown out...though Percy wouldn't believe that wasn't her goal going in.

She's the daughter of Athena, which doesn't give me a lot of ammunition. I mean, "Owl-head" and "Wise Girl" are kind of lame insults.

"Lame but classics," Alex nodded contemplatively. "Surely you could get creative with all the world of nerd insults. Poindexter might suit her, or-"

"We are not going to sit around and make up insults about her, or her cabin," Thalia sighed.

"Just trying to keep the playing field even," Alex said, though raised her hands quickly in surrender.

"You know you love it." She bumped me with her shoulder, which I guess was supposed to be friendly, but she was wearing full Greek armour, so it kind of hurt.

"Both," Jason snorted.

"Definitely both," Percy agreed as he rubbed his shoulder with the biggest smile.

Her grey eyes sparkled under her helmet. Her blonde ponytail curled around one shoulder. It was hard for anyone to look cute in combat armour, but Annabeth pulled it off.

"Cute, huh?" Will's little laugh was so infectious even as he rolled his eyes hard. "How, on earth, Travis ever bet against me that you two would end up together I'll never know when you literally had these thoughts running through your brain."

"Why were there bets?!" Percy seemed to be missing the teasing part of that as he once again frowned at Will. "Where is this magical bulletin board?"

"Right next to the one with play tryout dates," he said saintly. "Up in the Big House, don't know how you've missed it."

Percy didn't seem able to close his mouth to properly get anything back and Magnus took pity on him and moved on before he'd have to.

"Tell you what." She lowered her voice. "We're going to crush you tonight, but if you pick a safe position... like right flank, for instance... I'll make sure you don't get pulverized too much."

"Retreat! Re-treat!" Jason enunciated very clearly. "This is a trap! Percy, please run for your life!" He said it in a pretty bad imitation of a robotic alarmed voice for some reason like a crappy fire drill.

Probably because it would have had as much effect on Percy then as it did now, who was to busy grinning at the challenge to hear a word.

"Gee, thanks," I said, "but I'm playing to win."

She smiled. "See you on the battlefield."

She jogged back to her teammates, who all laughed and gave her high fives. I'd never seen her so happy, like the chance to beat me up was the best thing that had ever happened to her.

"Percy is doomed," Thalia agreed casually. "Apparently even without fighting with me he can't avoid screwing up these games."

"I helped win the last one!" He spluttered, breaking out of his delusion of her hair escaping its helmet to glare at Thalia non-effectively. "You could have a little faith in me, I know her, her tricks!" He ended with a pretty sad stutter and crossed-eyed concern if this was a trick in a trick to make that any kind of believable.

Beckendorf walked up with his helmet under his arm. "She likes you, man."

"Sure," I muttered. "She likes me for target practice."

"Both," Jason said again with absolute confidence.

"Definitely both," Alex chuckled.

"I almost believed you that time," Percy sighed.

"Oh we're serious," Jason and Alex assured.

"Nah, they always do that. A girl starts trying to kill you, you know she's into you."

"What is this, playground rules?" Magnus sighed. He was no fool, he knew full well his cousin liked Percy back, but it was clearly complicated with her for several reasons and he assumed that's why she didn't act on it more. Who was this ding-dong, whose name he only vaguely recognized, trying to assure Percy of anything?

"Makes a lot of sense."

Beckendorf shrugged. "I know about these things. You ought to ask her to the fireworks."

Percy sighed. He'd really been wanting to talk to somebody about this back then, and Beckendorf seemed like the guy all of a sudden, but now that the moment was here...it felt like a waste of breath. What could he say Percy didn't already know?

I couldn't tell if he was serious. Beckendorf was lead counsellor for Hephaestus. He was this huge dude with a permanent scowl, muscles like a pro ballplayer, and hands calloused from working in the forges. He'd just turned eighteen and was on his way to NYU in the autumn. Since he was older, I usually listened to him about stuff, but the idea of asking Annabeth to the Fourth of July fireworks down at the beach – like, the biggest dating event of the summer – made my stomach do somersaults.

Then Silena Beauregard, the head counsellor for Aphrodite, passed by. Beckendorf had had a not-so-secret crush on her for three years. She had long black hair and big blue eyes, and when she walked the guys tended to watch. She said, "Good luck, Charlie." (Nobody ever calls Beckendorf by his first name.) She flashed him a brilliant smile and went to join Annabeth on the red team.

"I think she was beckoning to him," Alex said with a brilliant smile. Will and Nico both laughed hard at the pun while Jason and Magnus joined the groaning this time.

"Uh..." Beckendorf swallowed like he'd forgotten how to breathe.

I patted him on the shoulder. "Thanks for the advice, dude. Glad you're so wise about girls and all. Come on. Let's get to the woods."

Percy laughed along loudest of all. Finally, somebody else's girl misshaps wasn't at his expense!

...it felt a tad forced in his throat for some reason though he didn't like. A nagging idea in the back of his mind that had sporadically been cropping up. Now here, thinking of the beach, talking to Silena, the thought tried so hard to crystalize into something- but the idea was gone as his stomach pitched in pain and his skin felt a great flush of heat. He knew that feeling, he knew better than to mess with a memory like that.

Naturally, Beckendorf and I took the most dangerous job.

"Naturally," Will repeated in a very posh, british voice.

"Because if we gave Will the most dangerous job he'd stop to sniff the oranges to much," Nico smirked.

"We all have our strengths," he agreed without batting an eye.

While the Apollo cabin played defence with their bows, the Hermes cabin would charge up the middle of the woods to distract the enemy. Meanwhile, Beckendorf and I would scout around the left flank, locate the enemy's flag, knock out the defenders and get the flag back to our side. Simple.

Why the left flank?

"Because Annabeth wanted me to go right," I told Beckendorf, "which means she doesn't want us to go left."

"Please tell me you at least considered a double cross? Then a triple cross. Then a quadruple cross-"

"Jason!" Percy groaned. "I'm well aware Annabeth's going to pull one over on me, but I had to pick a lane! I'm sure I threw off her whole plan by just showing up."

Jason just shook his head at him, but then, he also would have been interrogating Annabeth about every layer of her plan if she were here and refused to tell him, so Percy didn't feel that bad about stopping him from pitching every way he was going to be wrong.

Beckendorf nodded. "Let's suit up."

He'd been working on a secret weapon for the two of us – bronze chameleon armour, enchanted to blend into the background. If we stood in front of rocks, our breastplates, helms and shields turned grey. If we stood in front of bushes, the metal changed to a leafy green. It wasn't true invisibility, but we'd have pretty good cover, at least from a distance.

Alex threw her head back laughing. "Somebody got jealous of Annabeth's hat!

"Ooo," Thalia said with interest. "Where's mine?"

Percy had some half-baked remark about her doing extra chores for him to help get Beckendorf's favor, but he choked on the words and nothing really came out except some spit while Thalia patted him on the back with a troubled smile she tried hard to look real.

"This stuff took forever to forge," Beckendorf warned me. "Don't mess it up!"

"You got it, Captain."

Beckendorf grunted. I could tell he liked being called Captain.

Thalia was still listening with great interest, and clearly decided she had her own turn at co-captain with him stuck in her craw more than letting him dwell on why he kept pressing his thumb between his eyes.

"Oh sure, him you just conceded the throne to! I was born to be a righteous, mighty warrior to lead armies, but this guy you just hand the crown."

Percy's shaking hand fell, a teasing smile instantly back. "Try getting accepted into college Thals, then maybe I'll watch you run your own team right into the river."

They even started bartering back and forth about who would get which cabin before Magnus bravely cleared his throat and waved the book around before they realized Annabeth would have to pick a side. That was a blood bath waiting to happen.

The rest of the Hephaestus campers wished us well, and we sneaked off into the woods, immediately turning brown and green to match the trees.

We crossed the creek that served as the boundary between the teams. We heard fighting in the distance – swords clashing against shields. I glimpsed a flash of light from some magical weapon, but we saw no one.

"No border guards?" Beckendorf whispered. "Weird."

"Overconfident," I guessed. But I felt uneasy. Annabeth was a great strategist. It wasn't like her to be sloppy about defence, even if her team did outnumber us.

Jason was over there muttering, "trap, this is a trap," and even spelling it out under his breath repeatedly while Thalia was still smirking and muttering about Percy botching this up like he had to hers. Percy sighed again about what great faith his friends seemed to have in him, but at least the headache was staying at bay.

We moved into enemy territory. I knew we had to hurry, because our team was playing a defensive game, and that couldn't last forever. The Apollo kids would get over-run sooner or later. The Ares cabin wouldn't be slowed down by a little thing like arrows.

"What about trick arrows?" Alex asked with interest. "Tip them in all kinds of fun stuff, or attach any number of things to activate-"

"I think we should just ban Alex's desert privileges before she even gets there," Percy grinned.

"Take away my chocolate, dudette, see what happens," she smirked.

"That sounds like a Chiron problem," Percy shrugged, picking at the hem of his shirt without concern.

We crept along the base of an oak tree. I almost jumped out of my skin when a girl's face emerged from the trunk. "Shoo!" she said, then faded back into the bark.

"Dryads," Beckendorf grumbled. "So touchy."

"Am not!" a muffled voice said from the tree.

Magnus was pretty proud of himself for laughing along at the mild moment instead of, say, freaking out the tree's could decide to kill them all in their sleep. Again.

We kept moving. It was hard to tell exactly where we were. Some landmarks stood out, like the creek and certain cliffs and some really old trees, but the woods tended to shift around. I guess the nature spirits got restless. Paths changed. Trees moved.

"They what?" Magnus yelped like his tail was on fire. "They just, move their whole tree, and roots, and plant them, and, they what?"

"It's pretty funny to watch, they just hike their leaf skirts up and their branches get top heavy sometimes so they-"

Thalia finally smacked Percy to get him to stop while the others couldn't stop snickering at the look of miserable acceptance on Magnus's face when he couldn't decide if Percy was telling the truth, or worse, nobody had any clue how or why the dryads did that and it was just another level of crazy.

Then suddenly we were at the edge of a clearing. I knew we were in trouble when I saw the mountain of dirt.

"A child of the ocean's worst enemy," Thalia snorted. "Take notes Nico."

"I've never tried just throwing soil around," he admitted with a smile that didn't mean he wouldn't be willing.

Percy narrowed his eyes contemplatively who would beat whom, earth-shaker versus child of the Underworld. He'd just have to challenge him to a digging competition to prove it later.

"Holy Hephaestus," Beckendorf whispered. "The Ant Hill."

"Do you all take your parent's names in vain?" Jason startled in surprise.

"Well it would just be weird if he said Holy Aphrodite, now wouldn't it," Percy shrugged.

"So who should Jason pray to? Merlin's Mankini," Alex smirked.

"If I've ever dabbled in witchcraft Alex, I would use whatever spell I could to burn that image from my mind," Jason sighed.

I wanted to back up and run. I'd never seen the Ant Hill before,

Why is Ant Hill capitalized, Magnus let the stray thought flit through his mind without interrupting to point it out. He just wanted a few more seconds of delusional peace this was just a sacred place and they were in awe of all its nonlethal help.

but I'd heard stories from the older campers. The mound rose almost to the treetops – four storeys at least. Its sides were riddled with tunnels, and crawling in and out were thousands of...

"Myrmekes," I muttered.

"Oh this is bad," Jason already realized. Percy never remembered the name of a monster otherwise.

That's Ancient Greek for "ants", but these things were way more than that. They would've given any exterminator a heart attack.

"Me too," Magnus promised with an opener like that.

The Myrmekes were the size of German shepherds. Their armoured shells glistened blood-red. Their eyes were beady black and their razor-sharp mandibles sliced and snapped. Some carried tree branches. Some carried chunks of raw meat that I really didn't want to know about. Most carried bits of metal – old armour, swords, food platters that had somehow found their way out here from the dining pavilion. One ant was dragging the glossy black hood of a sports car.

Magnus face planted the pages and groaned with misery. He'd been expecting a dragon, he'd been trying to mentally prepare himself for scaly beasts that could eat them! Now there were two, or more likely two thousand more deadly things running around! Why was Percy's life like this?!

"Now those are the kind of bugs that can take over the world, survive the apocalypse and become our new lords of the land," Alex grinned with wild delight, wondering if she could turn into something metal.

"They have to work on their infrastructure before I'd consider it," Percy said, resisting the urge to plug his nose through memory.

"They love shiny metal," Beckendorf whispered. "Especially gold. I've heard they have more gold in their nest than Fort Knox." He sounded envious.

"Don't even think about it," I said.

"Now that's a roll reversal if I've ever heard one," Nico chuckled in surprise. His stomach was pitching in disgust at the idea of mounds of treasure, he could all to easily picture Bianca in there picking up a hair pin and his old figurine again...so it was much more fun to imagine Beckendorf holding Percy's straps back at the idea of these things getting their jaws on a gold skateboard.

"I was not one of those weird kids who tried to drown and burn ant hills," Percy sniffed.

"Dude, I won't," he promised. "Let's get out of here while we..."

His eyes widened.

Fifteen metres*50 feet away, two ants were struggling to drag a big hunk of metal towards their nest. It was the size of a refrigerator, all glittery gold and bronze, with weird bumps and ridges down the side and a bunch of wires sticking out the bottom. Then the ants rolled the thing over, and I saw a face.

Magnus was about one word away from throwing this book in that trashcan that vanished things to nowhere. He'd give Percy better memories, he'd make up ones that didn't involve...all of this.

I just about jumped out of my skin. "That's a –"

"Shhh!" Beckendorf pulled me back into the bushes.

"But that's a –"

"Dragon's head," he said in awe. "Yes. I see it."

"So it's only his head," Magnus sighed in relief, the book's saving grace. "I can live with that."

"Right, buddy, you keep thinking that," Will muttered low enough Magnus only squinted suspiciously at him. What on earth made the poor guy think the rest of the body wouldn't come with the head?

The snout was as long as my body. The mouth hung open, showing metal teeth like a shark's. Its skin was a combination of gold and bronze scales, and its eyes were rubies as big as my fists. The head looked like it had been hacked from its body – chewed by ant mandibles. The wires were frayed and tangled.

"Robot dragon," Magnus sighed, trying to decide if that made this horror better or worse. On one hand he could imagine Tyson punching it in the face a little easier. On the other...robot dragon!

"I bet Percy sticks his head in that and tries to scare Annabeth," Alex snickered.

"I'm worried where the rest of the body is," Jason frowned how a camp had a whole dragon buried somewhere in there and what else was just under their feet.

"Hey, I just realized," Magnus looked a little extra miserable now for some reason. "Where's Tyson? I'd feel better with a fire-breathing machine around if he was."

"He went back to the Cyclops forges the week before," Percy said reluctantly. "Trust me, I was missing him right about then too."

The head must've been heavy, too, because the ants were struggling, moving it only a few centimetres with every tug.

"If they get it to the hill," Beckendorf said, "the other ants will help them. We've got to stop them."

"I take it back," Nico said with a puzzled frown. "Everybody at your camp is just nuts."

"So glad to not be the exception for once," Percy nodded his agreement.

"What?" I asked. "Why?"

"It's a sign from Hephaestus. Come on!"

Magnus dropped the book in his lap and pressed his hands to his ears. "I never want to hear of another sign from your parents!"

"This is a good one," Will tried to soothe, though his voice hitching a bit gave away the lie, so he finished, "eventually."

Magnus gave him a baleful look and wondered how many people the robot dragon killed just by stepping on them before that eventually happened. There really was just no point arguing though he should skip to that, Percy's reaction was probably going to be worse than whatever the dragon did.

I didn't know what he was talking about, but I'd never seen Beckendorf look so determined. He sprinted along the edge of the clearing, his armour blending into the trees.

I was about to follow when something sharp and cold pressed against my neck.

"Surprise," Annabeth said, right next me. She must've had her magic Yankees cap on because she was totally invisible.

"I guess that makes sense," Jason chuckled. "She'd know better than to take her eyes off of you."

"She just wanted to jack that armor for herself," Alex smirked.

"She doesn't need it," Magnus said blankly.

"But I'm sure she has a whole speech ready about Percy stealing her thing," Alex insisted.

I tried to move, but she dug her knife under my chin.

"You've been held at knifepoint enough in your life," Nico shook his head, "I think I'm with Alex, she's just jealous she never got her turn at that too."

"I'm sure Annabeth has a list somewhere of what she wants revenge on Percy for and this was just a convenient outlet," Will chuckled.

Silena appeared out of the woods, her sword drawn. Her Aphrodite armour was pink and red, colour coordinated to match her clothes and makeup. She looked like Guerilla Warfare Barbie.

Thalia laughed way to hard at that one, but she'd been making Barbie jokes about that cabin for years and was probably just mad and appreciative of Percy getting to that one first.

"Nice work," she told Annabeth.

An invisible hand confiscated my sword. Annabeth took off her cap and appeared before me, smiling smugly. "Boys are easy to follow. They make more noise than a lovesick Minotaur."

Magnus looked newly traumatized at that sentence. "Who, who would he be lovesick after?"

"Geryon probably, he's the only monster with enough heart and a love of cattle," Alex said slyly.

Most of the others didn't seem to know whether to laugh or gag at that input and Magnus decided to read around her for it.

My face felt hot. I tried to think back, hoping I hadn't said anything embarrassing.

"You did not actually," Jason said helpfully, for once. "Though I'm sure it's just a matter of time."

There it was.

No telling how long Annabeth and Silena had been eavesdropping.

"You're our prisoner," Annabeth announced. "Let's get Beckendorf and –"

"Beckendorf!" For a split second I'd forgotten about him, but he was still forging ahead –

"Right towards the deadly ants," Will sighed.

"Annabeth truly will block out any other thought," Nico sounded grudgingly impressed.

straight towards the dragon's head. He was already twelve metres *40 feet away. He hadn't noticed the girls, or the fact that I wasn't behind him.

"Not the, greatest backup," Jason frowned.

"Credit for determination," Thalia shrugged.

"I bet he invents something that forces people to eat his dust," Alex chuckled.

"Come on!" I told Annabeth.

She pulled me back. "Where do you think you're going, prisoner?"

"I imagine her dragging you all the way back to Alcatraz and throwing you in the cell Braries used to be in just to prove her point," Magnus admitted.

"Labyrinth or no Labyrinth," Percy agreed.

"Look!"

She peered into the clearing and for the first time seemed to realize where we were. "Oh, Zeus..."

Beckendorf leaped into the open and struck one of the ants. His sword clanged off the thing's carapace. The ant turned, snapping its pincers. Before I could even call out, the ant bit Beckendorf's leg, and he crumpled to the ground. The second ant sprayed goo in his face, and Beckendorf screamed. He dropped his sword and slapped wildly at his eyes.

The collective shudder that went around the room may have knocked a few more support beams off their hinges. That went from zero to a hundred real quick from a friendly game to a death sentence. If this kid died, or even was maimed from these horrible injuries Percy was going to take that very personally...

I surged forward, but Annabeth pulled me back. "No."

"Charlie!" Silena yelled.

"Don't!" Annabeth hissed. "It's already too late!"

"What are you talking about?" I demanded. "We have to –"

Then I noticed more ants swarming towards Beckendorf – ten, twenty. They grabbed him by the armour and dragged him towards the hill so fast he was swept into a tunnel and disappeared.

Magnus was left sitting there shivering for several moments at the brutality of that. Bianca's and Zeo's deaths had been blunt, but not so much an out of the blue considering who they'd been fighting and the quests they'd been on. They didn't even know this guy, and it had just shot out of nowhere, like all those shrouds at camp were still waiting to float up.

"No!" Silena pushed Annabeth. "You let them take Charlie!"

Jason took an uneasy breath, trying to keep well off his face he wasn't sure how to take that. She'd saved Percy and Silena's life by doing so, but the cost felt ruthless.

"There's no time to argue," Annabeth said. "Come on!"

I thought she was going to lead us on a charge to save Beckendorf, but instead she raced to the dragon's head, which the ants had momentarily forgotten. She grabbed it by the wires and started dragging it towards the woods.

Percy's mouth was a fantastic showing of his feelings for that. She had never once shown an inclination for stuff over somebody's life, she hadn't even blinked at throwing Deadlus's wings away, she was as much a figurehead in that camp as him for kids to look up to. He'd follow her lead, but not exactly without hesitation when she was going to be crazier than an automaton about it.

"What are you doing?" I demanded. "Beckendorf –"

"Help me," Annabeth grunted. "Quick, before they get back."

"Oh, my gods!" Silena said. "You're more worried about this hunk of metal than Charlie?"

"Did that sign from Hephaestus involve some part of saying a child of Athena would become addicted to dragon heads?" Magnus asked in absolute concern for her mental health.

"You'd be lucky if a sign from a god had a message that clear," Thalia scoffed.

Annabeth spun around and shook her by the shoulders. "Listen, Silena! Those are Myrmekes. They're like fire ants, only a hundred times worse. Their bite is poison. They spray acid. They communicate with all the other ants and swarm over anything that threatens them.

"I liked my world better when I didn't know all of that," Magnus huffed, doing a poor job of ignoring Alex grinning in fascination and studying her hands like she was already imagining them with feelers.

If we'd rushed in there to help Beckendorf, we would have been dragged inside, too. We're going to need help – a lot of help – to get him back. Now, grab some wires and pull!"

Will watched as Percy clenched his hands and prepared to do as asked. He'd been about to follow Beckendorf without a clue. As much as everyone at Camp considered him a leader, it was really they all followed Percy's lead. Annabeth keeping Silena's head on was something to be proud of, Percy was the camp's beacon of who to shine the light on.

I didn't know what Annabeth was up to, but I'd adventured with her long enough to figure she had a good reason for what she was doing. The three of us tugged the metal dragon's head into the woods. Annabeth didn't let us stop until we were fifty meters* 55 yards from the clearing.

Magnus whistled in appreciation. "You drug that thing half a football field!"

"Almost a full blue whale," Alex grinned.

"At minimum as long as these books are laid out," Thalia rolled her eyes.

"It felt as long as the Jersy Turnpike," Percy groaned as he rotated his shoulder in vivid memory.

Then we collapsed, sweating and breathing hard.

Silena started to cry. "He's probably dead already."

"No," Annabeth said. "They won't kill him right away. We've got about half an hour."

"How do you know that?" I asked.

"Is she an entomologist too?" Jason sighed with envy.

"She's a Greek-ologist," Percy reminded with pride.

"I've read about the Myrmekes. They paralyse their prey so they can soften them up before –"

Silena sobbed. "We have to save him!"

"What Silena's siblings are probably thinking of her being in Annabeth's company for to long," Nico muttered. That girl didn't have an ounce of tact...and he was kind of annoyed he probably would have gone into details of their eating habits too without realizing that wasn't helping.

"Silena," Annabeth said. "We're going to save him, but I need you to get a grip. There is a way."

"Call the other campers," I said, "or Chiron. Chiron will know what to do."

"I don't think an exterminator has enough bug spray for this problem, let alone him," Magnus shivered.

"Where's a monster ant eater when you need one," Jason agreed.

"Why would you want Echidna back right now?" Will looked at him strangely.

Annabeth shook her head. "They're scattered all over the woods. By the time we got everyone back here, it would be too late. Besides, the entire camp wouldn't be strong enough to invade the Ant Hill."

"Then why is it there?!" Magnus cried in exasperation, he looked very near tears. "I demand an explanation why you and your entire nutjob of a family feel the need to have this in your backyard!"

"Lots of monsters got in before Thalia's tree was blessed," Will shrugged, completely unphased by his minor tantrum. "As you just read, we can't exactly kick them all out even if there was a reason to."

Magnus sighed and muttered an apology, reminding himself there was just no point in arguing any of this.

"Then what?"

Annabeth pointed at the dragon's head.

"Okay," I said. "You're going to scare the ants with a big metal puppet?"

"Annabeth does love taking part in our play, she's nearly always the star," Will snickered.

Percy gave him a long-suffering sigh. He was not going to strangle Will, he promised himself. He was just having fun, that was overkill, he would not strangle this idiot because of a joke...

"It's an automaton," she said.

That didn't make me feel any better. Automatons were magical bronze robots made by Hephaestus. Most of them were crazed killing machines, and those were the nice ones.

"What does that make Daedalus?" Alex mock whispered.

"The best of the worst," Percy snorted.

"So what?" I said. "It's just a head. It's broken."

"And sadly, I think the mermaids realize that, considering they dragged it there," Magnus sighed.

"Myermeks," Thalia corrected.

"Not if they're going to kidnap people back to their lair and drown them in acid they're not," Magnus sniffed.

"Percy, this isn't just any automaton," Annabeth said. "It's the bronze dragon. Haven't you heard the stories?"

I stared at her blankly.

"How to sum up these books in one sentence," Nico smirked.

Annabeth had been at camp a lot longer than I had. She probably knew tons of stories I didn't.

"Percy, you really don't have to keep repeating yourself," Jason shook his head.

"We just assume Annabeth knows every story ever, she's read every book and probably sleeps on a throne of them," Magnus rolled his eyes.

"I bet her favorite is probably still something mundane, like Star Wars," Alex said with a little wrist wave.

"Star Wars has a book?" Percy asked blankly.

"Would you guys stop trying to confuse the poor guy," Thalia said with a tragic expression as she moved to cover his ears, "you're crumbling his entire worldview!"

Percy smacked her away and called them all clowns and a few other choice words.

Silena's eyes widened. "You mean the old guardian? But that's just a legend!"

"Whoa," I said. "What old guardian?"

Annabeth took a deep breath. "Percy, in the days before Thalia's tree – back before the camp had magical boundaries to keep out monsters – the counsellors tried all sorts of different ways to protect themselves. The most famous was the bronze dragon. The Hephaestus cabin made it with the blessing of their father. Supposedly it was so fierce and powerful that it kept the camp safe for over a decade. And then... about fifteen years ago, it disappeared into the woods."

"Ooooh," Nico said in surprise. "Beckendorf's reaction actually does make sense now."

"Better than some other ancient prophecy about the end of the world," Percy agreed.

"And you think this is its head?"

"It has to be! The Myrmekes probably dug it up while they were looking for precious metal. They couldn't move the whole thing, so they chewed off the head. The body can't be far away."

"But they chewed it apart. It's useless."

"Not to mention, um, why did its batteries run out?" Magnus frowned. What did these things even run on? He'd never thought to ask.

"I'm pretty sure Annabeth could make a toadstool useful," Percy reminded.

"Not necessarily." Annabeth's eyes narrowed, and I could tell her brain was working overtime. "We could reassemble it. If we could activate it –"

"It could help us rescue Charlie!" Silena said.

"Hold up," I said. "That's a lot of ifs. If we find it, if we can reactivate it in time, if it will help us.

"I'm surprised that has you pausing," Thalia said. "Your life is a big series of what if's."

"What if I die, what if I die, what if I die?" Jason repeated, throwing up a finger for each.

"The day I stop worrying about that is the day I get cursed with immortality," Percy reminded with nothing but dread.

You said this thing disappeared fifteen years ago?"

Annabeth nodded. "Some say its motor wore out so it went into the woods to deactivate itself. Or its programming went haywire. No one knows."

"Do they hibernate?" Alex grinned. "Did it go off looking for a mate? Maybe he wanted to go on a better adventure where some poor farm boy finds him and saves the world."

"I need you to keep your ideas far away from Cabin 9," Will frowned at her. "If they make these things any more realistic, I will cry right along with Magnus."

"I'm just trying to foster encouragement and creativity," but Alex batted her eyes in a purely menacing way, a clearly deep want to have a robot dragon that she could ride into battle and slay the entire planet.

"You want to reassemble a haywire metal dragon?"

"I want Annabeth to have normal hopes and dreams," Percy sighed.

"Sorry Perce, wanting to date you doesn't fall on that list," Jason smirked.

Percy considered for a moment if the trade would still be worth it for his bladder's sake, but he didn't get the chance to linger on it.

"We have to try!" Annabeth said. "It's Beckendorf's only hope! Besides, this could be a sign from Hephaestus. The dragon should want to help one of Hephaestus's kids. Beckendorf would want us to try."

"Never have I yet heard being related to any of this stuff has made it more friendly! With the exception of Tyson!" Magnus balked.

"Exactly, I think some of the other kids are due for some," Thalia shrugged.

I didn't like the idea. On the other hand, I didn't have any better suggestions. We were running out of time, and Silena looked like she was about to go into shock if we didn't do something soon.

Will had a very unpleasant bubbling feeling in the pit of his gut. Wondering at Silena's decisions, if she'd been considering calling Luke for help in some deluded idea. He'd gotten a first hand look at the kind of despair that had been on her face for days and had no wish to keep thinking on all this in the slightest, but it's not like he could boot her out of Percy's memories.

Beckendorf had said something about a sign from Hephaestus. Maybe it was time to find out.

"All right," I said. "Let's go find a headless dragon."

"Maybe if you don't attach his head back he'd be less scary?" Magnus sighed.

"I hope they name him Reid!" Alex grinned.

We searched forever, or maybe it just seemed that way, because the whole time, I was imagining Beckendorf in the Ant Hill, scared and paralysed, while a bunch of armoured critters scuttled around him, waiting for him to be tenderized.

"To bad you can't start a bucket brigade from the kitchens," Jason frowned, "dish soap and lava would probably clear this problem up easier."

"We'll call that plan B," Percy shivered, well aware they only had one chance at plan A for Beckendorf to live...and there was a really horrible feeling deep inside him that made him worry if he even did...

It wasn't hard to follow the ants' trail. They'd dragged the dragon's head through the forest, making a deep rut in the mud, and we dragged the head right back the way they'd come.

"Talk about going around in circles," Percy sighed as he rubbed the back of his neck, "this head's doing full 360's."

"And somehow still making more progress than you on your capture the flag game," Jason muttered, well aware that wasn't on anyone's radar right now, but a part of his mind that never stopped working regardless.

We must've gone five hundred meters* over 500 yards – and I was getting worried about the time – when Annabeth said, "Di immortales."

We'd come to the rim of a crater – like something had blasted a house-size hole in the forest floor. The sides were slippery and dotted with tree roots. Ant tracks led to the bottom, where a large metal mound glinted through the dirt. Wires stuck up from a bronze stump on one end.

"You just know that thing would have some crazy rumors about it if you didn't know what it was," Alex chuckled. "Zues's wifi hotspot, tree that used to house a magic tree house that went evil, flying fish spawn from there."

"I am convinced you are the child of whatever god of stories is out there," Thalia shook her head in pure endearment of her.

"And I love it!" She threw her arms wide and smacked Magnus in the face while the others got a mild laugh from her antics.

"The dragon's neck," I said. "You think the ants made this crater?"

"Ant's are great at excavating their own mounds, but how well do they dig up stuff?" Magnus agreed in surprise that sounded kind of deep in the earth for them to have just found.

"Annabeth would know," Percy frowned he had no clue what was really going on, as usual.

Annabeth shook her head. "Looks more like a meteor blast..."

"Though now I am absolutely over here wondering if Hepeahsuts's big sign was his recreation of the dinosaur event or something," Nico grumbled if he'd thrown a meteor to take this thing out and his kids were just uncovering the remains.

"Hephaestus," Silena said. "The god must've unearthed this. Hephaestus wanted us to find the dragon. He wanted Charlie to..." She choked up.

Jason winced, that didn't seem very in line with these gods he'd heard of. Heaphusts hadn't even flinched when told the camp might be overrun, but he wasn't going to argue the point with anyone right now.

"Come on," I said. "Let's reconnect this bad boy."

Getting the dragon's head to the bottom was easy. It tumbled right down the slope and hit the neck with a loud, metallic BONK!

"I wonder if he enjoyed the ride," Thalia chuckled.

"That had to have been better than getting dragged away from his body," Will nodded, while Percy shivered at the idea of this thing being awake while all that happened.

Reconnecting it was harder.

We had no tools and no experience.

Annabeth fiddled with the wires and cursed in Ancient Greek. "We need Beckendorf. He could do this in seconds."

Alex took a deep breath before saying, "The man who built it doesn't want it, the man who bought it doesn't need it, the man who needs it doesn't know it."

"Are you seriously invoking the freaking sphinx right now?" Percy groaned. "One monster at a time isn't enough?"

"Oh, I know!" Jason waved his hand.

"Poor timing Alex," Magnus agreed while Jason was still glaring at Alex with his hand raised.

"I just thought it particularly appropriate right now," Alex said with the whole hope it didn't actually come true. "And since when do you need permission to talk around here Jason?" She shot at him in exasperation.

"The answer's kind of morbid, just making sure I should," he finally lowered his hand with a shrug.

"No morbid jokes until after the person is rescued," Thalia said swiftly as Percy started looking a little gray around the edges again the longer this dragged on.

"Isn't your mom the goddess of inventors?" I asked.

Annabeth glared at me. "Yes, but this is different. I'm good with ideas. Not mechanics."

"There's an I in both of those words though, so I'm kind of surprised to hear that," Jason chuckled.

"Annabeth's never claimed to be a solo act," Magnus reminded with a hopeful smile. "Even from Percy's first quest she knew she needed someone to get her out of camp rather than trying to go it alone."

Percy grinned with delight at that nugget while Jason nodded his agreement in mild apology.

"If I was going to pick one person in the world to reattach my head," I said, "I'd pick you."

I just blurted it out – to give her confidence, I guess – but immediately I realized it sounded pretty stupid.

"Well at least you finally realize the stupid shit that comes out of your mouth," Thalia chuckled. "Progress."

"Will it stop him from doing it? No," Nico smirked.

"Stop me from doing what?" Will asked innocently.

"Stop encouraging him Nico! You did that on purpose!" Percy groaned in protest to every word of this. Nico was to busy snickering to even pretend otherwise, and it was so far removed from the depressed little kid Percy only had memories of he didn't have the heart to act on that strangling threat again.

"Awww..." Silena sniffled and wiped her eyes. "Percy, that is so sweet!"

"Was it?" Nico asked blankly. Well crud, he clearly had no idea how to flirt.

"Annabeth wasn't impressed, so it's anyone's guess," Percy sighed, a slight blush still on his cheeks.

Annabeth blushed. "Shut up, Silena. Hand me your dagger."

I was afraid Annabeth was going to stab me with it.

Causing very unfair laughter around the room while Percy hung his head. He already had no clue what was going on, did he need a live audience for it?

"Does she kiss you again?" Alex asked eagerly, leaning on the edge of her seat.

"Then we'd have to call her out on bad timing," Magnus shook his head. "Beckendorf's about to die, not him."

Percy was rubbing his lip with a mosh pit of butterflies in his stomach, he couldn't make himself speak or they'd all come out. It's not like he was opposed to the idea, though that was ten times more morbid than even Alex could probably ever be if it was some odd new tradition like holding his hand underground was...

Instead she used it as a screwdriver to open a panel in the dragon's neck. "Here goes nothing," she said.

And she started to splice together the celestial bronze wires.

It took a long time. Too long.

I figured capture the flag had to be over by now. I wondered how soon the other campers would realize we were missing and come looking for us. If Annabeth's calculations were correct (and they always were), Beckendorf probably had five or ten minutes left before the ants got him.

"I trust Percy's internal clock pretty accurately too," Thalia shivered for that poor guy, even knowing the other Huntresses would consider her a traitor for doing it. "He always gets to the microwave right before it goes off."

"The one thing I've never managed to explode, it was to vital to my life," Percy agreed.

Finally Annabeth stood up and exhaled. Her hands were scraped and muddy. Her fingernails were wrecked. She had a brown streak across her forehead where the dragon had decided to spit grease at her.

Percy's fingers curled tight around his camp necklace to try and hide the fact his heart skipped a beat. How was it possible the worse she looked the more he couldn't look away?

"All right," she said. "It's done, I think..."

"You think?" Silena asked.

"It has to be done," I said. "We're out of time. How do you, uh, start it?

Alex frowned and paused and sighed. She knew she shouldn't get offended at them calling the dragon an it, but she'd have preferred if they just kept referring to the creature as the dragon, or even used they, them pronouns. This was a machine though, and she didn't want to start picking fights about that kind of topic right now.

 Is there an ignition switch or something?"

"I really hope nobody left the key in their pocket, we don't have time to find out where the hotwire is," Nico frowned.

Annabeth pointed to its ruby eyes. "Those turn clockwise. I'm guessing we rotate them."

"Are we sure she doesn't have a manual shoved up her sleeve somewhere," Jason looked fascinated how she'd found that out from some wiring and was probably going to be picking up a new hobby soon...hopefully not specifically of the metal dragon variety.

"If somebody twisted my eyeballs, I'd wake up," I agreed.

"Good to know," Thalia nodded to Percy's eyeballs great concern. "My next course of action was to start cutting out teeth if you didn't soon."

"I wake at the drop of a hat," Percy tried to defend.

"When your life's in danger," she completely agreed while Percy looked pleadingly at the ceiling.

"What if it goes crazy on us?"

"Then... we're dead," Annabeth said.

"I always admire her confidence!" Will burst out laughing.

"Yeah, because you've never been on the receiving end of it," Nico muttered.

"Great," I said. "I'm psyched."

"Psyched as an ADHD kid in a filing cabinet," Thalia snickered.

Together we turned the ruby eyes of the dragon. Immediately they began to glow. Annabeth and I backed up so fast we fell over each other.

"Awww, the first thing it sees is what we all put together in the first five seconds too," Alex said with a posh wave of her hand. "So sweet of you guys not to leave him out!"

"You're lucky that dragon's probably color blind Alex, or you'd be his dessert," Percy rolled his eyes.

The dragon's mouth opened, as if it were testing its jaw. The head turned and looked at us. Steam poured from its ears and it tried to rise.

When it found it couldn't move, the dragon seemed confused. It cocked its head and regarded the dirt. Finally, it realized it was buried. The neck strained once, twice... and the centre of the crater erupted.

The dragon pulled itself awkwardly out of the ground, shaking clumps of mud from its body the way a dog might, splattering us from head to toe.

Percy had gotten some in his mouth and he spat nothing out in here in disgust. Silena had looked more like Mud Bath Barbie, and Annabeth seemed to have gone brunette there for a strange moment she was so caked down.

It was, by far, the least important thing to be happening in this memory, but struck Percy as strange all the same why he couldn't get the idea out of his head.

The automaton was so awesome, none of us could speak. I mean, sure it needed a trip through the car wash,

"Which Percy has ample practice in," Jason chuckled.

"I still might need a few test runs to make sure I get the settings right," Percy gave him an obvious look. "Are you volunteering?"

"Only if you promise no flesh eating horses or robot dragons are in there at the same time," he sighed because he knew he wasn't getting out of it now.

and there were a few loose wires sticking out here and there, but the dragon's body was amazing – like a high-tech tank with legs. Its sides were plated with bronze and gold scales, encrusted with gemstones. Its legs were the size of tree trunks and its feet had steel talons. It had no wings – most Greek dragons don't – but its tail was at least as long as its main body, which was the size of a school bus. The neck creaked and popped as it turned its head to the sky and blew a column of triumphant fire.

The longer the description dragged on the quieter Magnus's voice got, until he was sunk far enough back into his seat it looked like it was eating him and he was whispering.

Alex sighed and had no other clue how to get him out of this silly funk, it's not as if a dragon was going to appear in here. So she leaned very close to his ear, he didn't even notice as his eyes never left the page, and casually said, "boo."

Magnus startled, fell out of his chair still hugging the book to his chest, and then lay across Alex's feet for several moments glaring up at her before raising the book to hide her face and continuing to read in a normal volume like nothing had happened.

"Well..." I said in a small voice. "It still works."

"Thank you Percy!" Magnus jabbed at him, letting the book fall against his nose for a moment without care.

"Here to help man," Percy nodded, studying him in concern what they were supposed to do if Alex stepped on his face.

Unfortunately, it heard me. Those ruby eyes zeroed in on me, and it stuck its snout five centimetres* an inch from my face.

Magnus shivered from head to toe, probably causing a new crack in the floor where he lay. He was likely to curl up into the fetal position in moments, and Percy couldn't blame him as he gagged on the remembered smell of gasoline and tabasco filling his nose and the pitiless hunger in those ruby sockets.

Instinctively, I reached for my sword.

"Dragon, stop!" Silena yelled. I was amazed her voice still worked. She spoke with such command that the automaton turned its attention to her.

Silena swallowed nervously. "We've woken you to defend the camp. You remember? That is your job!"

The dragon tilted its head as if it were thinking. I figured Silena had about a fifty-fifty chance of getting blasted with fire.

"The other half is getting her head ripped off like a real Barbie," Thalia informed in case they'd missed that.

"Nah, she's got this," Will grinned. There was a lingering sadness to his smile nobody else understood, but he had full knowledge she could lead anyone into battle, even a dragon.

I was considering jumping on the thing's neck to distract it

"Percy!" Thalia smacked him upside the head. "Why, in the gods names, is that, your, first, thought?" She started smacking him repeatedly on the arm.

"Because I'm pretty sure it would work," Percy shrugged, watching in mild fascination as it seemed to hurt her hand more than he felt it the longer she kept going.

when Silena said, "Charles Beckendorf, a son of Hephaestus, is in trouble. The Myrmekes have taken him. He needs your help."

At the word Hephaestus the dragon's neck straightened. A shiver rippled through its metal body, throwing a new shower of mud clods all over us.

The dragon looked around as if trying to find an enemy.

"We have to show it," Annabeth said. "Come on, dragon! This way to the son of Hephaestus! Follow us!"

Just like that, she drew her sword, and the three of us climbed out of the pit.

"For Hephaestus!" Annabeth yelled, which was a nice touch. We charged through the woods. When I looked behind us, the bronze dragon was right on our tail, its red eyes glowing and steam coming out its nostrils.

It was a good incentive to keep running fast as we headed for the Ant Hill.

Magnus's voice was pitching in and out like bad reception now, ignoring the glitter of Alex's toenails in the corner of his eye easily enough as he still wasn't as convinced as Percy seemed to be that dragon probably wasn't so much as following them but chasing them.

When we got to the clearing, the dragon seemed to catch Beckendorf's scent. It barrelled ahead of us, and we had to jump out of its way to avoid getting flattened. It crashed through the trees, joints creaking, feet pounding craters into the ground.

It charged straight for the Ant Hill. At first, the Myrmekes didn't know what was happening. The dragon stepped on a few of them, smashing them to bug juice.

"Good dragon," Alex crooned.

Then their telepathic network seemed to light up, like: Big dragon. Bad!

"Somebody get me a magnifying glass!" She yelped.

"Alex, it was dark out when this was happening," Nico reminded.

"I can use the moonbeams, I'll get creative," she promised.

Nobody was really sure how that was going to start or end, and they were kind of scared to ask. Magnus, however, finally sat up and leaned against his seat now that at least the dragon's focus wasn't on Annabeth and Percy anymore.

All the ants in the clearing turned simultaneously and swarmed over the dragon. More ants poured out of the hill – hundreds of them. The dragon blew fire and sent a whole column of them into a panicked retreat. Who knew ants were flammable?

"Every psychopath I've ever met," Magnus scoffed.

"Guess you meet more interesting people than I do Magnus, and that's saying a lot," Percy said with a raised brow. The place had been lit up like a bonfire in seconds, how the rest of camp hadn't come running was an honest mystery.

But more kept coming.

"Inside, now!" Annabeth told us. "While they're focused on the dragon!"

Silena led the charge; it was the first time I'd ever followed a child of Aphrodite into battle.

A hiss of pain fell from Percy's lips this wouldn't be the last, but though he rubbed his temple he was almost smiling at the bad feeling too. It was kind of cool to realize in the moment this was Silena coming into her own, getting a chance to realize a memory was so awesome the first time doubled.

We ran past the ants, but they ignored us. For some reason they seemed to consider the dragon a bigger threat. Go figure.

"Their mistake," Jason scoffed.

"I'm not arguing the point," Percy rolled his eyes.

"Because you're an idiot," Thalia chuckled with nothing but affection.

We plunged into the nearest tunnel and I almost gagged from the stench. Nothing, I mean nothing, stinks worse than a giant ant lair. I could tell they let their food rot before eating it. Somebody seriously needed to teach them about refrigerators.

"Would Chiron and Mr. D be okay with them piggy backing off their electric bill though?" Nico smirked. "I already don't think they're holding up their share of the rent."

"It smelt worse than Smelly Gabe," Percy insisted. "I would donate- okay, I don't even get an allowance there, but if this is a recurring problem I'd flip the breaker switch or something!" He smiled at the others getting a laugh out of this while he fought the urge to gag. He was happy for them, truly, they only had to hear about this and not live it...though it only made him miss Annabeth more every word she'd be plugging her nose same as him.

Our journey inside was a blur of dark tunnels and mouldy rooms carpeted with old ant shells and pools of goo. Ants surged past us on their way to battle, but we just stepped aside and let them pass.

"To bad they're not all storming out to argue which is better, Antz or Bugs Life," Alex sighed.

"I'm sure they'll go back to their clubs and debats as soon as their home isn't under attack and the kiddos are full of goo," Nico said with her level of chipper, which was kind of starting to concern Percy. He hadn't sounded depressed in hours.

The faint bronze glow of my sword gave us light as we made our way deeper into the nest.

"Look!" Annabeth said.

I glanced into a side room, and my heart skipped a beat. Hanging from the ceiling were huge, gooey sacks – ant larvae, I guess – but that's not what got my attention. The cave floor was heaped with gold coins, gems and other treasures – helmets, swords, musical instruments, jewellery. They glowed the way magic items do.

"That's just one room," Annabeth said. "There are probably hundreds of nurseries down here, decorated with treasure."

"That's kind of cute," Magnus grudgingly admitted, all of his long, messy blonde hair still mostly on one side he was ignoring and reading through. "I wonder if they burst out and pick a favorite toy or something."

Alex resisted the urge to run her hand through the mess and straighten it out for him as she instead hummed in agreement.

"It's not important," Silena insisted. "We have to find Charlie!"

Another first: a child of Aphrodite uninterested in jewellery.

"I bet if it was cursed jewelry she'd at least hesitate," Jason said in mild defense.

"Nah, she'd find a way to work that curse with her outfit, it's their own magical gift," Percy sighed.

"Right up there with yours getting into trouble," Thalia shook her head.

We forged on. After six more metres* 20 feet, we entered a cavern that smelled so bad my nose shut down completely.

"I'm going to be sick," Percy promised, his stomach rolling at the memory alone.

"This is not class Mr. Jackson," Alex said in a snooty voice. "You were not excused!"

"Does anything get us out of your class Miss Fierro?" Will asked curiously.

She thought about it for a moment before shaking her head. "Nope, you will all sit and listen to my brilliance or so help me you will get homework!"

"You're not even reading," Magnus frowned up at her accusingly, giving her the excuse to swat his bangs into his face and watch him for a moment shake his long hair out to fix it.

"You're more evil than Mrs. Dodd's," Percy frowned, though his hand fell lax from his stomach at the distraction.

"I'm not the one forcing you to read this," she reminded with a touch of hurt, "and the homework is encouraged to be worked on together."

"Okay, just as evil as Chiron," Percy chuckled.

The remains of old meals were piled as high as sand dunes – bones, chunks of rancid meat, even old camp meals. I guess the ants had been raiding the camp's compost heap and stealing our leftovers. At the base of one of the heaps, struggling to pull himself upright, was Beckendorf. He looked awful, partly because his camouflage armour was now the colour of garbage.

"Damn, I don't even think Silena could find a way to match shoes with that," Jason heaved a tragic sigh.

"Hospital gown," Thalia said flatly.

"Charlie!" Silena ran to him and tried to help him up.

"Thank the gods," he said. "My – my legs are paralysed!"

"It'll wear off," Annabeth said. "But we have to get you out of here. Percy, take his other side."

Silena and I hoisted Beckendorf up, and the four of us started back through the tunnels. I could hear distant sounds of battle – metal creaking, fire roaring, hundreds of ants snapping and spitting.

"What's going on out there?" Beckendorf asked. His body tensed. "The dragon! You didn't – reactivate it?"

"Afraid so," I said. "Seemed like the only way."

"But you can't just turn on an automaton! You have to calibrate the motor, run a diagnostic... There's no telling what it'll do! We've got to get out there!"

"I'm now imagining him with seven kinds of wrenches having a fit over a monkey belt or something," Nico admitted.

"Think it's just called a tool belt Nico," Will offered. Nico smiled as he imagined Will pouring over car manuals to try and impress his dad, and then Will showing him a few.

As it turned out, we didn't need to go anywhere, because the dragon came to us. We were trying to remember which tunnel led to the exit when the entire hill exploded, showering us in dirt. Suddenly we were staring at open sky. The dragon was right above us, thrashing back and forth, smashing the Ant Hill to bits as it tried to shake off the Myrmekes crawling all over its body.

The sudden blast of air and light felt like a second rise out of the underworld. Percy remembered gaping up at that monstrosity, fire and smoke setting its golden face like the sun of a new day, sparks flying from every scale as it roared in pain. That dragon had saved their life, and he was once again just left wondering if Grover would want a hug from it or would consider that a first class meal.

"Come on!" I yelled. We dug ourselves out of the dirt and stumbled down the side of the hill, dragging Beckendorf with us.

Our friend the dragon was in trouble. The Myrmekes were biting at the joints of its armour, spitting acid all over it. The dragon stomped and snapped and blew flames, but it couldn't last much longer. Steam was rising from its bronze skin.

Even worse, a few of the ants turned towards us. I guess they didn't like us stealing their dinner. I slashed at one and lopped off its head. Annabeth stabbed another right between the feelers. As the celestial bronze blade pierced its shell, the whole ant disintegrated.

"Great, another thing to lug back," Alex huffed.

"We did not need a trophy of this event," Percy groaned.

"Slackers!" She sniffed.

"I – I think I can walk now," Beckendorf said, and immediately fell on his face when we let go of him.

"There's a right and wrong place for a pratt fall man," Jason said with a nervous laugh.

"Nobody ever said to Percy," Thalia finished for him.

"Charlie!" Silena helped him up and pulled him along while Annabeth and I cleared a path through the ants. Somehow we managed to reach the edge of the clearing without getting bitten or splashed, though one of my sneakers was smoking from acid.

"What is it with your bad luck and shoes?" Jason frowned.

"I was destined to be bigfoot in another life?" He shrugged.

Back in the clearing, the dragon stumbled. A great cloud of acid mist was roiling off its hide.

"We can't let it die!" Silena said.

"Awww," Alex grinned. "Don't ever let someone say I never agreed with a child of Aphrodite!"

"How I wish that would have been her mother's response," Thalia nodded along sternly. The goddess of love was probably up on Olympus somewhere watching and applauding at all the drama instead of actually swooping in to help, if she wasn't engrossed in a hollywood celebrity magazine first.

"It's too dangerous," Beckendorf said sadly. "Its wiring –"

"Charlie," Silena pleaded, "it saved your life! Please, for me."

Beckendorf hesitated. His face was still bright red from the ant spit, and he looked as if he were going to faint any minute, but he struggled to his feet. "Get ready to run," he told us. Then he gazed across the clearing and shouted, "DRAGON! Emergency defence, beta-ACTIVATE!"

The dragon turned towards the sound of his voice. It stopped struggling against the ants, and its eyes glowed. The air smelled of ozone, like before a thunderstorm.

Thalia gave a not-so-quite chuckle at the rare power she allowed to course through her. It was a heady feeling she wouldn't ordinarily enjoy sharing with a dragon for a moment, but this one had saved a camper's life.

ZZZZZAAAAAPPP!

Arcs of blue electricity shot from the dragon's skin, rippling up and down its body and connecting with the ants. Some of the ants exploded. Others smoked and blackened, their legs twitching. In a few seconds there were no more ants on the dragon. The ones that were still alive were in full retreat, scuttling back towards their ruined hill as fingers of electricity zapped them in the butt to prod them along.

Magnus snorted fantastically and threw his head back laughing.

"Are you done acting like the world is ending again?" Alex asked as she watched the nerves twitch around in his throat. He had a really strong jawline usually obscured but for this angle.

"For now," he agreed as he hoisted himself back into his usual seat.

The dragon bellowed in triumph, then it turned its glowing eyes towards us.

"Now," Beckendorf said, "we run."

This time we did not yell, "For Hephaestus!" We yelled, "Heeeeelp!"

Magnus immediately groaned again, eyeing the floor as if considering how much less he'd looked like a dragon sized snack from down there.

"Don't even think about it," Alex huffed as she grabbed the back of his shirt.

"I am being punished for a crime I did not commit!" He huffed.

"The two kind of sound the same," Will offered in a not at all helpful kind of voice. "Maybe the dragon just thinks they're charging off again to a wasps nest next."

"Will, that's worse," Magnus yelped. "You hear how that's worse, right?!"

Percy finally cleared his throat and reminded him to either get it over with or give it up, because, you know, he'd already lived through it.

The dragon pounded after us, spewing fire and zapping lightning bolts over our heads like it was having a great time.

Jason couldn't help a little snort of laughter he tried his hardest to pass off as a muffled sneeze. He couldn't help it, that dragon had been through it and sounded more like a puppy having fun without yet realizing his playmates weren't squealing with delight.

"How do you stop it?" Annabeth yelled.

Beckendorf, whose legs were now working fine (nothing like being chased by a huge monster to get your body back in order)

"There's a whole world of self-motiavting posters and workout videos missing out on this dragon marketing," Thalia nodded.

"One that the mist should keep them very far away from!" Percy frowned accusingly at her.

shook his head and gasped for breath. "You shouldn't have turned it on! It's unstable! After a few years, automatons go wild!"

"Would he have rather they left him for dead?" Nico asked conversationally.

"Not a hundred percent sure being rescued into a dragon chase is what I'd call great," Magnus reminded with exhaustion in every syllable.

"Good to know," I yelled. "But how do you turn it off?"

"Someone really needs to tell Hephaestus it's a design flaw not to be voice activated shut down with a secret password," Will would give them that.

"I'll do it," Percy said without hesitation, which was pretty much the worst person to be sent to do it and also the only one who would tell a god to do it.

Beckendorf looked around wildly. "There!"

Up ahead was an outcrop of rock, almost as tall as the trees. The woods were full of weird rock formations, but I'd never seen this one before. It was shaped like a giant skateboard ramp, slanted on one side, with a sheer drop on the other.

"You guys, run around to the base of the cliff," Beckendorf said. "Distract the dragon. Keep it occupied!"

"That, is the worst sentence, in the English language," Magnus looked pained he'd said those words together.

"Followed very closely by, look, I didn't want to be a half-blood," Percy actually nodded his agreement.

"What are you going to do?" Silena said.

"You'll see. Go!"

Beckendorf ducked behind a tree while I turned and yelled at the dragon, "Hey, lizard-lips! Your breath smells like gasoline!"

The dragon spewed black smoke out of its nostrils. It thundered towards me, shaking the ground.

"Maybe that's a compliment in dragon?" Jason asked bemusedly.

"You are way to calm about this man!" Magnus groaned.

"Percy's not freaking out," he reminded, throwing a thumb at him. "He just kind of looks annoyed at this, I'm betting because he lost his chance to win capture the flag more than this."

Percy smiled his automatic reaction was to agree with that...but it didn't erase the insistent strain on him through all of this. There was something he was forgetting about all of this, something about Beckendorf and Silena, but the circumstances didn't feel right. This did feel like just another day at camp, so it wasn't bothering him to much.

"Come on!" Annabeth grabbed my hand. We ran for the back of the cliff.

"So we can now put underground, and being chased by a dragon on that list," Thalia snickered.

"I, have a minor preference," Percy said, smiling like a dope and not like someone who was being threatened by a dragon. Magnus really felt alone that should be a bigger concern than it was.

The dragon followed.

"We have to hold it here," Annabeth said. The three of us readied our swords.

The dragon reached us and lurched to a stop. It tilted its head like it couldn't believe we'd be so foolish as to fight.

"No, no, like a baby unsure what to do next," Jason grinned in delight. "Think a puppy waiting to see if he gets treats for doing a good job."

"Jason, you are not adopting the electric murderous dragon," Will sighed.

"Aw, come on!" Jason frowned. "He sounds so cool, and I bet Beckendorf keeps him in great order."

"Mrs. O'Leary has a playmate her size," Nico couldn't help but chuckle along.

Alex whooped in delight and loudly seconded that, well hiding Will's wince and no actual answer.

Now it had caught us, there were so many different ways it could kill us it probably couldn't decide which to use.

"Well the fire's obviously his go to, but he probably used up all that on the ants," Magnus said with dripping disdain.

"Stomping you means he'd have to dig out Percy from between his toes, I don't know if they like to groom themselves as well as cats," Thalia nodded along.

"I bet his bite force is, the best, he might want to slice you up just for fun so you don't go down in one swallow," Alex said seriously.

"I am going to find a way to bury this dragon back where he came from," Percy frowned.

"Aww," they all mock groaned like Sally had just threatened to take their new toy away before busting out laughing.

We scattered as its first blast of fire turned the ground where we'd been standing into a smoking pit of ashes.

"Still think this is cute Jason?" Magnus shot at him.

"Like a puppy who doesn't understand he shouldn't bite," he agreed with a sunny smile.

Then I saw Beckendorf above us – at the top of the cliff – and I understood what he was trying to do. He needed a clear shot. I had to keep the dragon's attention.

"Yaaaah!" I charged. I brought Riptide down on the dragon's foot and sliced off a talon.

Its head creaked as it looked down at me. It seemed more confused than angry, like, Why did you cut off my toe?

"Percy, that was just rude and a complete overreaction," Thalia couldn't help but play along with Jason's joke now.

"I got Mrs. O'Leary already trained," Percy said deadpan. "I'm sorry if I hurt the murder-happy dragon's feelings!" He finished in complete exasperation at the pair.

Then it opened its mouth, baring a hundred razor-sharp teeth.

"Percy!" Annabeth warned.

I stood my ground. "Just another second..."

"Percy!"

And just before the dragon struck, Beckendorf launched himself off the rocks and landed on the dragon's neck.

The dragon reared back and shot flames, trying to shake off Beckendorf, but he held on like a cowboy as the monster bucked around. I watched in fascination as he ripped open a panel at the base of the dragon's head and yanked a wire.

"I want that engraved on the cabin's door," Alex said in awe.

"That's, not a bad idea," Will agreed, his tone as light as usual, but a little more wistful than it should have been.

Instantly, the dragon froze. Its eyes went dim. Suddenly it was only the statue of a dragon, baring its teeth at the sky.

Beckendorf slid down the dragon's neck. He collapsed at its tail, exhausted and breathing heavily.

"Charlie!" Silena ran to him and gave him a big kiss on the cheek. "You did it!"

Annabeth came up to me and squeezed my shoulder. "Hey, Seaweed Brain, you okay?"

"Fine... I guess." I was thinking how close I'd come to being chopped into demigod hash in the dragon's mouth.

"You were great." Annabeth's smile was a lot nicer than that stupid dragon's.

"We all have our own idea of beauty," Jason snickered.

"I'm more surprised he's not thinking, monkey see monkey do?" Thalia rolled her eyes at where he kept touching his cheek as if Annabeth had abandoned him on a real reward.

"You, too," I said shakily. "So... what do we do with the automaton?"

Beckendorf wiped his forehead. Silena was still fussing over his cuts and bruises, and Beckendorf looked pretty distracted by the attention.

Percy huffed and grumbled for a moment he wouldn't know what that would feel like, since Annabeth had gone to studying the dragon like it was another Parthenon she'd need to know every detail of. At least he'd been a part of this story, he realized with a surprised smile. Now next time some idiot kid didn't know the story of the bronze dragon, Percy would get to enlighten them for once.

"We – uh – I don't know," he said. "Maybe we can fix it, get it to guard the camp, but that could take months."

"Worth trying," I said. I imagined having that bronze dragon in our fight against the Titan lord Kronos. His monsters would think twice about attacking camp if they had to face that thing. On the other hand, if the dragon decided to go berserk again and attack the campers – that would pretty much stink.

"Or we could host cowboy events to see who can wrangle it into submission again," Alex offered.

"Chiron will make you sleep in the strawberry fields if you suggest any such thing!" Percy tried to splutter and protest, but some part of him worried their activities director would go for it as some kind of communal practice.

"I can live with that," she grinned in delight, and Percy felt a smile tugging at his lips in admiration. Nothing scared Alex, not a threat even Mr. D could try to put against her would dampen her.

"Did you see all the treasure in the Ant Hill?" Beckendorf asked. "The magic weapons? The armour? That stuff could really help us."

"And the bracelets," Silena said. "And the necklaces."

"There it is!" Thalia nodded like a heavy weight of concern had been lifted away.

"What would you do with all your free time at Camp if you didn't have a feud with them?" Will snorted.

"Be very bored I'm sure, probably help Alex bring more fun into that place. You boys could use the practice," she grinned a smile worthy of a dragon that made all of them silently weep a bit.

I shuddered, remembering the smell of those tunnels. "I think that's an adventure for later. It would take an army of demigods even to get close to that treasure."

"Maybe," Beckendorf said. "But what a treasure..."

Silena studied the frozen dragon. "Charlie, that was the bravest thing I ever saw – you jumping on that dragon."

Beckendorf swallowed. "Um... yeah. So... will you go to the fireworks with me?"

Percy still vividly remembered the first time he'd gotten a compliment from Annabeth, after he'd run that bus with the furies off the road. It was a feeling of such power flowing through him, like he could do anything in that moment.

Sadly, Annabeth was rather stingy with her compliments, or he probably would have been able to defeat Kronos by now.

Silena's face lit up. "Of course, you big dummy! I thought you'd never ask!"

Will savored the laughter that blasted through the room with his eyes closed for several moments. It was probably the last laugh Silena and Beckendorf would ever get. Even Nico and Thalia probably didn't know in detail what was about to happen. They knew she was the traitor, but they probably didn't even know Beckendorf as more than just another name in a long list of people they'd lost in the war, they just weren't around camp enough to know as he did what was soon coming.

Beckendorf suddenly looked a whole lot better. "Well let's get back, then! I bet capture the flag is over."

I had to go barefoot, because the acid had eaten completely through my shoe. When I kicked it off I realized the goo had soaked into my sock and turned my foot red and raw. I leaned against Annabeth and she helped me limp through the woods.

The laughter increased ten-fold, Will's always somehow had the power to do that as Percy's tapered off with a flush of embarrassment. "It, it really hurt guys, have you ever walked on twigs barefoot, and um, there were rocks around-"

"Just stop Percy," Thalia was rubbing a stitch in her side, her eyes swimming with delighted tears.

"Yeah," he agreed with a shameless sigh. He'd been trying to find any excuse to pluck up the courage and ask her, having her to lean on so close just like always felt like a comfort rather than a hindrance.

Beckendorf and Silena walked ahead of us, holding hands, and we gave them some space.

Watching them, with my arm around Annabeth for support, I felt pretty uncomfortable. I silently cursed Beckendorf for being so brave, and I don't mean for facing the dragon. After three years, he'd finally got the courage to ask Silena Beauregard out. It wasn't fair.

"Some things never change," Jason said with a shake of his head that didn't suit him, he had that tone like one speaking twice his age again. "You'll be fifty and still stumbling over a compliment for her again."

Percy smiled at the dream he was painting, he found it hard to imagine he lived another birthday, let alone so many compliments later, but it was a nice idea.

"You know," Annabeth said as we struggled along, "it wasn't the bravest thing I've ever seen."

I blinked. Had she been reading my thoughts?

"Um... what do you mean?"

Annabeth gripped my wrist as we stumbled through a shallow creek. "You stood up to the dragon so Beckendorf would have his chance to jump – now that was brave."

Percy's mind froze...and then went more haywire than a dragons. Wait, she had been talking about him, right?! Not some other doofus who stood up to a dragon and cut its toe off? Did she want him to ask her out or was she just mocking him? Had she ever called Luke brave? What if he asked and she looked at him like he was covered in ant goo-

"Or pretty stupid."

"Percy, you're a brave guy," she said. "Just take the compliment. I swear, is it so hard?"

We locked eyes. Our faces were, like, centimetres apart. My chest felt a little funny, like my heart was trying to do jumping jacks.

"I really thought reading the rest would help him break out of, that," Magnus said, gesturing at his sagging face.

"Guys, I think we broke Percy," Alex announced grandly.

"It was bound to happen eventually," Thalia sighed, waving her hand in front of his face. "I half expected this back when she kissed him in the volcano."

"I'd just go ahead and finish man," Jason said without bothering to hide the laugh in his voice. He always was extra animated when a capture the flag game went on, and this seemed to have surpassed the others. "She'll call him an idiot here in a sec and things will go on like normal.

"So..." I said. "I guess Silena and Charlie are going to the fireworks together."

"I guess so," Annabeth agreed.

"Yeah," I said. "Um, about that –"

I don't know what I would've said, but just then, three of Annabeth's siblings from the Athena cabin burst out of the bushes with their swords drawn. When they saw us, they broke into grins.

"You're alive!" Jason mock cheered. "We already had the search parties assembled and everything with practice!"

Percy finally gave himself a little shake and looked around at him. "How terribly inconvenient of us, how about we skip back into the woods and play hide and seek next, oh wait, we just ruined that game!"

"The game probably wasn't ruined for everyone," Magnus offered, "I'm sure somebody had fun tonight." It just never seemed to be him.

Judging by the smile lingering on Percy's face though, they were pretty sure he was happy with his hour returned of seeing her covered in a new coat of mud, oil, and sweat as his arm stayed around her only in his mind.

"Annabeth!" one of them said. "Good job! Let's get these two to jail."

"Doesn't defeating a dragon and living through Myrmekes get him a get out of jail free card?" Magnus protested.

"I never even manage that in Monopoly," Percy sighed. She was as scary as Tyson, he usually went broke before he even got close to drawing his first card.

I stared at him. "The game's not over?"

"Damn," Nico said in surprise. "I really think Percy spaced out watching her a little to much, I thought much more time had dragged on too."

Magnus was at least laughing in surprised agreement again while Jason was looking at the book with a very calculating expression.

The Athena camper laughed. "Not yet... but soon. Now that we've captured you."

"Dude, come on," Beckendorf protested. "We got sidetracked. There was a dragon, and the whole Ant Hill was attacking us."

"Uh-huh," said another Athena guy, clearly unimpressed. "Annabeth, great job distracting them. Worked out perfectly. You want us to take them from here?"

Annabeth pulled away from me. I thought for sure she was going to give us a free walk back to the border, but she drew her dagger and pointed it at me with a smile.

"Nah," she said. "Silena and I can get this. Come on, prisoners. Move it."

I stared at her, stunned. "You planned this? You planned this whole thing just to keep us out of the game?"

"No way," Thalia sounded way to proud even if she shook her head. "No way she managed all of that."

Magnus didn't really think so either. As clever as she was, even she couldn't have put all that together.

"Percy, seriously, how could I have planned it? The dragon, the ants – you think I could've figured all that out ahead of time?"

"She did!" Jason gasped, causing a flare of jealousy in Percy at the look of admiration on his face. "She totally did! Oh my gosh, this girl is a genius!"

"Annabeth wouldn't put those two in danger like that," Magnus insisted.

"Not on purpose," he still had a wild grin in place, "but I'll bet you anything she somehow tracked down where that dragon was buried, unearthed it just enough to show the head, and then waited, hoping the ants would time it with her game."

"Her game?" Percy groaned. He thought Annabeth was a genius too, but she might believe someone as smart as Jason over him.

"That's a lot of if's," Magnus looked personally offended now if his cousin had decided to put a deranged dragon back into activation for a flag.

"It probably all didn't go according to plan," Jason was getting wound up now as he babbled excitedly. "I bet she planned on Percy and Beckendorf seeing this by telling them which direction to go and hoping Beckendorf would spend his time fawning over the dragon and forget about the game, not go charging the ants!"

"How on earth did she excavate a whole crater and find that thing and I didn't even notice?!" Percy demanded.

"Maybe she got Tyson and the forest dryads to help before he left," Jason shrugged, "maybe she-"

"Guys!" Thalia finally interrupted with a bright smile as Percy was clearly winding up to argue back. "One of these days, we're going to get out of here and you can interrogate Annabeth all day."

Jason still had a smug, 'I'm right,' look on his face while Magnus and Percy exchanged, 'I hate every minute of this' expressions, but Magnus was almost done with one more of these, and that was enticing enough for now.

It didn't seem likely, but this was Annabeth. There was no telling with her. Then she exchanged glances with Silena, and I could tell they were trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, I'm on Jason's side," Alex grinned along. The plan had probably gone to hell, but those two badasses had brought it back and still come out on top.

"Well don't look at me," Will reminded as Nico was watching him as if waiting to see if he was holding out. "I was on Percy's team! They weren't going to be sharing that kind of info with the enemy!"

"You – you little –" I started to say, but I couldn't think of a name strong enough to call her.

"Owl breath," Alex offered.

"Traitor," Magnus grumbled, she was the cause of this heart attack.

"Genius!" Jason crowed.

Thalia couldn't stop laughing at all of them, she had a pretty good idea Percy wasn't going to be the only one tackling Annabeth when they met now.

I protested all the way to the jail, and so did Beckendorf. It was totally unfair to be treated like prisoners after all we'd been through.

But Annabeth just smiled and put us in jail. As she was heading back to the front line, she turned and winked. "See you at the fireworks?"

Kronos might as well have appeared and trapped him in a time bubble. Percy froze with whatever expression was on his face. Had she just asked him out?! Like on a date!? The fireworks were on a beach, where they might just stumble into the ocean and, and... he sighed as the rest of the night's events swam easily to mind now. Still a little foggy around the edges, but with clarity that he was trying to connect two events that were not having it. The fireworks had been a spectacular show, he'd watched every color of the rainbow flash across her face that night and heard her laugh at the amazing designs their fellow campers created. She had gone down to the ocean and rinsed herself off, but there had still been mud creased into her skin and a streak of oil in her hair that nearly covered up her gray bangs.

She had been happy, on this night, but when Connor and Travis went racing past yelling in delight and throwing popcorn and hotdogs around from a stand no one seemed sure where it had come from, and Chiron announced how good it felt to have so many here on this night as he held a moment of silence for those they lost, Annabeth had bowed her head and clutched the beads on her necklace Percy had never been a part of. She wasn't there yet, with him or Luke.

She didn't even wait for my answer before darting off into the woods.

I looked at Beckendorf. "Did she just... ask me out?"

He shrugged, completely disgusted. "Who knows with girls? Give me a haywire dragon any day."

So we sat together and waited while the girls won the game.

Percy laughed along with everyone else. There was a relief in it, the tension in the room always just under the surface at being locked in here managed to vanish for just that moment that they knew they couldn't hang on to. Percy's life was hectic and chaotic, sometimes it felt like his closest friends made that worse rather than better, but it was his life being shared with them, and he wouldn't have it any other way...otherwise he might not ever find out how he got down here.

PJOPJOPJOPJO

Annabeth absolutely planned this and you cannot convince me or Jason otherwise.

Though I don't think she meant for Beckendorf to get captured. Most likely she expected Percy and him to try and find the dragon's body and for Beckendorf to fix it and wake it up while they followed invisibly to keep an eye on them and all that would have taken up time until the game was won. Annabeth only stepped in when she realized Beckendorf split off, but I don't think she saw or heard where he split off to.

*Not a goofy name I made up by the way, but a real animal. Go look them up, they're adorable!

[heckthis-heckallofthis]

CAWF Tumblr simulator

🦠 Neutro-2145 Follow

B Cell hasn't worked in a while, the bacteria tastes bland…

(56 Notes)

❤️ IM1235 Follow

The neutrophils are so cool when they're saving the body! I should get them a gift to show my gratitude!

❤️ IM1235

Ok I just saw them rip out the insides of an infected cell, I don't think I can sleep tonight.

#oh my god #do they do that all the time???

(45 notes)

🧸 Dendri217 Follow

I don't think sewing lactic acid bacteria nearly everyday is good for my mental health, but it sure is fun! I need to go outside more I think

#lactic acid bacteria #my beloved #maybe I have too many of them #but you can never have too many lactic acid bacteria

(11 notes)

🎆 RegT59 Follow

As much as I love Helper T as a friend I wish he'd stop buying random things with our budget. He didn't even solve the Rubik's cube he bought last time, now he's buying those metal wire puzzles.

🎆 RegT59

He offered to get me something and I bought a conch shell just because it looked interesting. His bad habits are rubbing off on me.

#sigh #i should just stick to solitaire #our office is getting so cluttered

(64 notes)

⚪ Neutro-3033 Follow

The amount of people that don't know not all neutrophils enjoy eating bacteria or infected cells is wild. Have you tried to eat some?? It's terrible. Some of us only eat it because it's part of the job.

#i swear #its so annoying #at least the RBCS bring us stuff other than bacteria #i really wouldn't mind something less sweet

(82 notes)

✖️ Cross-TCell reblogged

🐦‍⬛ King-Killer

How do I tell my subordinates that I don't actually hate them and that I'm just strict and they need to stop being so sloppy? Believe me guys I like having you around please invite me to something I'm begging you

🐦‍⬛ King-Killer

That was a moment of weakness ignore that (please invite me please please please ple

🐦‍⬛ King-Killer

WHICH ONE OF YOU REBLOGGED THIS?? NOW ALL MY SUBORDINATES ARE CONSTANTLY BRINGING ME WITH THEM FOR LUNCH????

#its okay squad leader #we honestly just thought you'd be too busy to bother with us #so glad you actually do like us #the boys love you too

(19 notes)

🍸 Microfold108 Follow

What even is the point of living? If not just for the sake of a higher being we don't even know? Are they good? Are they bad? Maybe they're the nicest person in the world, maybe they're a serial killer who has murdered countless of their kind. Do they know we work only for them? Do they know how many of us love them?

🍸 Microfold108

Nevermind Dendritic cell came over with a lot of friends and he said they all enjoyed me so maybe there is more to life than that.

#i need to find an actual interest #maybe then I'll stop being so negative about everything

(4 notes)

🟩 HelperT31 Follow

Apparently you can just buy a house??? On Sellular?? I'm going to prank Reg T with this. It's going to be so funny, imagine I pull out a whole house right in front of the office, she'd go insane.

#nobody reblog this I can't let reg t see this #itll ruin the surprise

(1,129 notes)

🗡️ NatKiller095 Follow

Non-immune cells are literally so scary, how do you socialize everyday without getting tired or stressed out??? What do you MEAN you think us murdering cells is scarier?? At least I don't have to go around the ENTIRE body just to hand over a box of gases to someone I barely know!

✨ Eosin-9024 Follow

I agree!! How else would you relieve stress if you can't straight up explode? I would rather die than have to deal with that everyday, I'm so glad parasitic infections are rarer than bacterial and viral infections.

#non immune cells #im sorry for exploding your houses all the time but you guys genuinely terrify me

(34 notes)

🪩 B265 Follow

I love working on the skin! So many beautiful women up here! Way better than working for that insane idiot boss in the alimentary tract

#talking about helper T cell #he sucks so bad #wont let me live my life for just 5 minutes #i do really miss reg t tho #she was way better than helper T

(8 notes)

🪄 Mast92 Follow

The reason why Cellor-sun was so adamant about saving her friends despite risking her life to do so was because if she didn't she risked the Natchlor absorbing her powers and in turn causing the destruction of the whole vessel. Yes she loves her friends but she needed to take the risk, it was a big part of the plot, how do people not see that the first time they watched??

Also I hate how they forcefully gave Cellor-sun a love interest. Soma was an interesting character as Cellor-sun's new companion but they didn't have to force the love interest trope on him. I feel like the trope was so one dimensional, like two different people wrote him. The Cellor-sun I know would never instantly fall in love with someone like that! Their arc was literally 20 minutes long!!! She has high standards and yet just happened to meet someone who has all those exact standards??? Where do you find a cell that happens to be into all your interests, mesh well with your friends, and don't mind that you are a magical girl constantly risking your life for the sake of the vessel?? Soma would've been fine if he was just a friend of Cellor, he could've been her love interest, just stretch it out realistically. He has interesting powers that interact well with the rest of the cast, I really just wish his arc with Cellor would've been written better. Whoever wrote that needs to post a public apology right now.

#cellor-sun against the univessel #cellor-sun #soma-san catu #i could've written it better for real #catu

(424 notes)