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#bcs in the eyes of almost everyone this scene meant the way to a happy ending except for lxc
maalidoesart · 3 months
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now both of you are gone
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saetoru · 2 years
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omg bc you asked for loid thirsts the other day i binged the series (i’ve been meaning to for months now, that just kicked my ass into gear lmao)
but loid feels like the kinda person who’s so used to taking care of everybody else that the moment somebody starts taking care of him he just ~melts~ 😮‍💨 give him a handjob or blowjob, and don’t ask for anything in return, just doin’ it ‘cause ya genuinely love him and want him to relax? mans is getting a ring not even a day later
#𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 — 𝐋𝐎𝐈𝐃 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐄𝐑.
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tags: nsfw, gn! reader, hand jobs
notes: sobs i am so mentally ill over him THANK YOU FOR SPARING SOME THOUGHTS
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loid can’t remember the last time he’s had time to just sit. nothing to do, nowhere to be, and no one to find. but he’s here right now, slumped across the couch, you seated on his lap, and he thinks maybe he should find more time for this—because this, you, this is a real shame to miss out on.
it’s almost muscle memory for him. it’s almost instinctive to reach for your waistband and sink his fingers past your folds—but then you shove his hand away. he furrows his brows, wants to say something, and he even opens his mouth to voice his thoughts, but then you palm him through his pants, and all that manages to escape his mouth is a choked groan.
“just relax,” you murmur, pressing a small kiss to his cheek, and he breathes heavier as your hands travel past his waistband to wrap around his stiff length, exposing it to the cool air as he hisses. “you just sit there and look pretty,” you hum.
he almost blushes—though you notice that the tips of his ears are just the slightest bit pink.
“what about you—”
“some other time,” you cut him off, “jus’ wanna take care of you.”
he frowns. loid forger doesn’t get looked after, it’s just not something that happens. ever. he’s used to being the one that does the looking after, the one that makes sure everyone’s okay before himself—and it’s meant to stay that way. but his cock is pulsing in your hand, hot and heavy and aching to cum, and he almost contemplates if he should really be putting up a fight.
it’s second nature to protest though. “but i always—”
“c’mon,” you groan, “just let me.” and you’re pouting.
you’re pouting like the prospect of him not relaxing, of him not melting under your touch as you care for him is making you upset. it’s foreign being handled so gently, like he’s fragile and dainty and vulnerable (which he’s not—ever), but he’ll admit it’s not exactly awful.
he must look a little skeptical still because suddenly, without warning, your thumb smears the pre cum leaking from his slit around his tip before gently stroking him a few times. his eyes flutter shut, and a low, quiet groan falls from his lips.
“see? it’s not so bad relaxing, huh?” you whisper against the shell of his ear, still dragging your palm up and down his hardened length, squeezing slightly at the tip each time. “you get to feel good. isn’t that nice? just let me help you relax.”
“fuck,” he grunts, and his hips do a little twitch that has him thrusting into your fist just a little, chasing the friction before he can stop himself. he wonders if it could be that bad to just listen to you this once. “okay,” he mumbles, eyes squeezing shut, “yeah, okay,” he finally caves.
you murmur a happy little “yay,” and he’s less than willing to admit he almost imagines you with a wedding band around your finger. he quickly tries to fight the scene in his head of your ring adorned hand wrapping around his cock before he cums too fast.
but then you squeeze around him a little tighter, your free hand moving to cup his balls and making his head fall back against the couch, and he’s not sure if he can hold himself out for too long in the first place. he moans, eyes squeezing shut as his lips tug between his lips, and your thumb glides through his slit. for the first time, he seems to be caught off guard—if the slight hitch in his throat is of any indication.
“i love you,” you say gently, littering soft kisses along his jaw, hand still gliding up and down his cock. “always taking care of me—you deserve the same too, yeah?”
everything feels hot, your skin on his and your breath fanning against his ear as you praise him. he feels pleasure burn through his nerves, chest heaving up and down as he approaches his orgasm slowly. loid can’t help but let out a soft gasp when you increase your pace, louder groans spilling from his lips—and his lips are pretty, so you lean in and press a soft peck to them, once, twice, then a third time before he desperately kisses you back.
it’s a messy kiss, a light clash of teeth and labored breaths as he pants against your mouth, letting out sweet little moans that you drink in as his fucks into your fist. he’s flushed, skin a dust of blush over his face and peeking through what little you can see of his chest from his shirt. his cock twitches in your hand, tip swollen and red, leaking pre cum and glistening in your hand as you stroke him.
“fuck, like that. feels so good,” he rasps, “g-gonna…gonna cum.”
“c’mon, baby,” you encourage, “just let go.”
a few more strokes of your hand as the other lightly fondles with his balls, and you feel him twitch in your hold once more. if you didn’t know any better, you’d say the noise he makes is a strangled whine as he spills into your hand, his own hands gripping your hips tightly for stability as he bucks up desperately into your fist and rides out his high. he groans your name lowly, voice cracking in the middle before finding your lips again as thick ropes of cum paint your hand white.
“god, fuck,” he pants against your mouth, and with a few more spurts of cum, he finishes, burying his head into the crook of your neck as he pants, trying to catch his breath. “you’re gonna be the death of me.”
“just wanna show you i love you,” you huff, face softening as he slowly wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you a little closer. “you should let me take care of you more often.”
his heart does a little jump, and something unfamiliar bubbles up in him as loid takes in your words. and he’s not entirely sure what to say, so for now, he settles for sighing with content into your skin as your clean hand threads through his sweaty locks gently.
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guys he’s so hot i’m gonna throw up
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aranarumei · 2 years
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THE GODDAMN SASAMIYA VOL 9 EXTRAS…
putting it under the cut for like spoilers and just bc I did write a bit
obviously sasaki and miyano r sweet as usual. something else on my mind tho. okay because LITERALLY. i was thinking this earlier abt the ch where sasaki runs into hirano on the train and hirano sees sasaki like smiling at his phone bc he’s texting miyano and I was just thinking… wow. it’d be nice if hirano was texting kagiura on the train too. i wonder if anything is up with that. but oh my god. my wishes were answered.
hirano and kagiura are so cute. like wow!! they just both meet up with each other. and if I’m not reading it wrong, the way hirano almost texts can we meet up before kagiura does!! and then hirano literally looks at kagiuras face and is like “great! I feel better now” like it’s just so obvious how… at ease he feels around him. also man I get what sasaki meant abt how hirano’s a bit more talkative now bc like. obviously hirano smiles and laughs and it’s a very good smile and laugh but this whole scene is like… there’s no dramatic closeups of how he lights up when he smiles or anything he’s just. smiley. happy to be there.
it makes me think of what the manga has been bringing up with everyone asking hirano if he’s reallllllly sure he wants to room with kagiura again next year but like… here it’s so obvious. when he’s tired he wants to see kagiura and spend even just a little time with him. that time they played basketball together the break was almost ending and hirano still went and joined him. it rly feels like the hirano we see through kagiuras eyes is so bright and joyful but I feel like. it’s almost because he’s around kagiura that he’s that way in the first place!
anyways now I’m just sitting here wondering with intense curiosity what the fuck their relationship looks like at this moment in time… hirano seems to be pretty oblivious in some ways? but also he’s definitely like… teasing kagiura in a way that I feel like he hasn’t done yet? what does it all mean…
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lovehistories · 2 years
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ep 13&14
a few thoughts about eaw episodes 13&14 bc i’m fresh off of 14!!!!!!
1) i’m aware that i’m prob in the minority over this, but i’m not surprised about or frustrated re: the young woo/junho lack of communication over their breakup (YET, there’s a provision here that the future make up scene between them has to bowl me over emotionally and remind me of why love is the most beautiful theme there is in storytelling etc etc) bc what i  t h i n k  the writer is trying to do is show that this is an entirely different kind of problem that these two are facing, with an entirely different degree of weight. 
we’ve had ppl doubt junho’s feelings before, we’ve had ppl question the validity of their relationship, but we haven’t rly had the very simple and very devastating question between the two of them of: “you make me so happy, but do i make you happy? is your life better with me in it?” as a viewer you’re very much allowed to hate the asking of the question bc you think it’s one of the least interesting parts about young woo and junho’s relationship, 100%!!!! some of you might even be hurt by it, and i understand that too. but i also think that we as viewers are privy to a lot more than the characters of young woo and junho are in show. 
the answer is obvious to us––of course they’re happier together, of course both of their lives have become more beautiful because they met, it’s in junho’s eyes and young woo’s smiles––but this is young woo’s first time being in a serious romantic relationship, so how is?? she supposed to know how to navigate what happiness is between two people and to see all of the wonderful things that she brings to the table when everyone else has only ever told her otherwise??? i think we’re also meant to assume that even if junho almost definitely has had romantic relationships in the past, this is the first time that someone has meant so much to him. and i think that when you’re coming fresh off of heartbreak and confusion, this coming out of nowhere for him (he still doesn’t know that young woo overheard what he and his sister were talking about, which.....i would Not have saved this particular conflict for the last fourth of the show LMAO), junho’s hesitation to speak isn’t all that surprising. we’ve seen this kind of hesitation from him before when young woo confessed repeatedly and he had to gather himself emotionally before he could respond (the stakes are much higher this time too), so i hope!!! this was just the writer closing the loop on that theme one last time. 
logistically, i also think that the writer has dug themselves into a very deep hole and this is what i hope is a calculated risk that could go very well or very badly. by not addressing the escalating conflicts between young woo/junho one by one (i.e. elaborating more on young woo’s response to junho’s initial reaction to them not officially dating in ep 12)......they now have to address them all at once.
2) idk what the game plan was at eaw hq, but it’s so far past too late to humanize minwoo for us now. at this point, and at literally no point, does having sick family members excuse minwoo of a sliver of the garbage that he did for the entire run of the show. seeing him as a “whole person” doesn’t rly serve his character in any meaningful way besides as a set up for suyeon to fall in love with him, which....i’m making a separate post on that LOL. my honest opinion of the sudden minwoo/suyeon love line if we’re meant to take it at face value is that the writer(s) didn’t know what to do with suyeon anymore after she stopped pursuing the idea of being in a relationship with junho......which is a huge shame because her character could have so much more going on with her.
3) what was young woo dad’s response to her question over the phone..........pls tell me we get to hear the other half of that conversation eventually.......... :’’’’’’)
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clarenecessities · 2 years
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perspective flip: better (if i’m allowed to be more specific, someone else’s perspective from chapter two) ((sorry if you got this ask more than once, tumblr was being a butt))
Perspective Flip: I’ll write a scene from [Better, Chapter Two] from another character’s point-of-view
man tell me about it, it ate my whole first draft of this lmao
the more specific the better! here’s Bow’s Big Epiphany, capped off when Adora interrupts bc transitions suck
Unusual Fic-Specific Asks for Authors
“So it’s not Scorpia?” Frosta asked Adora, relaxing slightly as Catra left the room. Bow couldn’t say he blamed her, but the things he’d seen on Beast Island–the way Catra had broken down--well, Glimmer always said he was too forgiving. Maybe it would have been harder, if he hadn’t seen how nice future-Catra was (and how cute her babies were). 
“Not Scorpia,” said Adora, lips pursed like she was fighting a scowl. “I can’t figure it out. She never had a crush on anybody when we were growing up, but her future self said she’d already been in love, so--either it’s happened since I became She-Ra, or she lied to me for like… years, probably.” 
“She never told you she liked anyone?” asked Perfuma. She exchanged a glance with Bow, an unsurprised little ‘I imagine Catra’s been lying to everyone for years’ look that Bow probably meant a little more sympathetically than she did.  
“She never even tolerated anyone. The other cadets were either total jerks or scared of her, except the rest of our squad.” Adora paused, blinking hard like she was trying to force a thought from her mind. “It can’t--not Lonnie. She hates Lonnie. She kind of hates most people.”
“I mean, what about you? She tolerated you,” Mermista pointed out, raising a skeptical eyebrow. 
“Yeah, of course, but I was her best friend. We did everything together,” said Adora, frowning. She wasn’t quite defensive--the denial seemed almost instinctual to Bow, like she couldn’t imagine a world where she and Catra had been separate entities, despite their recent demonstrations to the contrary. “I’m telling you, there’s no way I wouldn’t have picked up on it, even if she didn’t tell me. It’s gotta be recent.” 
“Adora, no offense,” said Glimmer, at least trying to contain her exasperation, “but it did take you almost twenty years to realize the Horde was evil.” 
“That’s different,” said Adora, rolling her eyes. “This is Catra. Your mom says I didn’t realize the Horde was evil because--because it would hurt too much? I guess? There wouldn’t have been anything I could do about it, not until I found the sword. I needed to be able to… do something. Before I could do something. Does that make sense?” 
What a way to phrase it. Bow looked down at the tracker pad again, trying to ease the ache in his heart by looking at future-Adora, how happy and free she seemed. It hurt to hear how she thought of herself, how little she understood of her own thought processes during the ceaseless trauma of growing up in the Fright Zone. Adora’s heart beat with the need to protect, but she couldn’t even consider that her mind had been trying to extend that to her, however unconsciously. 
He hadn’t been there when Angella tried to explain this to Adora, but he was willing to bet she hadn’t placed so much emphasis on the sword. From the moment she’d joined the Rebellion, Adora had clung to that blade like it was her entire identity. They had to coax and cajole the rest of her personality out from behind the ‘dutiful soldier’ persona she couldn’t bear to relinquish. 
He wished he knew how to help her.
“No,” said Frosta, blunt as always.
“The sword represented an unprecedented agency,” said Perfuma, exchanging another sad look with Bow. “By accepting its power, you were able to accept your true feelings about the Horde.” 
“Sure,” said Adora, agreeing immediately despite the blankness in her eyes. She didn’t understand Perfuma’s point any better than she had Angella’s. 
But maybe Perfuma had a point--maybe to Adora, the sword wasn’t just another duty to take on. Maybe it was also her ability to choose for herself? Maybe that’s what she was clinging to? 
He looked back down at the picture. She didn’t have the sword on her. 
“That’s great and all, but how do we make her accept her true feelings about who Catra’s in love with?” asked Mermista, crossing her arms.
“Uh,” said Adora. 
“We are allowed to talk about your feelings,” said Bow, smiling at her. She’d been so open since speaking with her future-self. Maybe they could finally find a way to help her. “We just can’t bug Catra about hers!”
“I don’t--my feelings?” 
“Yeah!” said Glimmer, lighting up at the prospect. “Maybe it is like you not realizing the Horde’s evil! You could have some like, mental block keeping you from unlocking the truth!” 
“How are my feelings going to help that?” Adora asked weakly. 
“Well, let’s consider it from a new angle,” said Bow, rubbing his chin in one hand. “The only people we know she’s spent time with since you left are Scorpia and Entrapta, and I think we can pretty much rule out Entrapta. Are there any other female Force Captains?” 
“I mean, yeah. There’s Octavia--” 
“Oh! The octopus lady! Could it be her?” said Bow, brightening. Although wait, she was pretty old, compared to them…
“Catra clawed her eye out when we were six.”
“Ah,” said Bow, wincing. When they were six? His stomach turned, remembering his own clumsy adventuring at that age. To have been raised in the Horde–to have known all along that it was an evil, dangerous place, with no prospect of escape… Catra must have felt so trapped there. What had Octavia, at least a decade their senior, done to warrant a wound so devastating? How had Catra even been able to reach? 
He preferred to think it was just her lashing out, that Octavia had been an authority figure Catra had been confident enough to risk pissing off. Maybe it had just been a shallow scratch which had gotten infected, instead of the gouging he pictured automatically. 
Had she been scared? Scared enough to attack? Scared of the consequences once she had? 
“I appreciate your creativity Bow, but from what we know of Catra I think it’s more likely that she already had feelings for someone,” Perfuma cut in. “She’s very… goal-oriented. I doubt her attention was wandering in romantic directions once she was promoted.” 
And boy, wasn’t that true. Dissuading Catra from something was about as easy as dissuading Adora. 
“So she lied to me,” said Adora.
“Well… maybe,” said Perfuma. “Did you outright ask if she had a crush on anyone?” 
“Yeah! A bunch of times! She always said that stuff was stupid and she had more important things to worry about, said Adora, outright pouting. 
“That’s not a no…” said Glimmer, looking almost apologetic. It made Bow smile; that’s exactly the kind of defense she’d use if he called her out for lying. ‘Oh, I didn’t mean it that way,’ or ‘I didn’t say that’. Maybe she and Catra had more in common than he’d realized.
“Did she ever ask you?” asked Mermista. 
“Well yeah, it’s kind of--it’s a reciprocal thing, you don’t just ask and not answer yourself. Like half the time she asked first, it’s just a basic--friend--question--thing,” Adora stammered, flushing with clear embarrassment. 
“And did you ever tell her when you had a crush?” asked Mermista. 
“I’m--I mean, I would have? But I never had one, so--” 
“You never had a crush?” Mermista interrupted, plainly disbelieving.
“I kind of had a lot going on, okay?” huffed Adora. “There’s no time for stuff like that in the Horde.”
“So where do all the little Hordelings come from?” asked Mermista. 
Adora’s face darkened, grew heavy with emotions she rarely let even Bow and Glimmer see. He leaned into her, trying to reassure her with his physical presence. Pressure seemed to relax her, to ground her, most of the time. She probably wouldn’t accept a hug right now, but she leaned back into him automatically, so maybe it helped.
“Most are stolen,” she said at length, “Some are surrendered willingly. Some of us were taken in after being kidnapped across dimensions by an artificial intelligence bent on universal domination. You know, classic Hordeling sources.”
Bow winced. Mermista’s eyes widened, and she looked at the other princesses for help, but they all seemed just as lost for words as she was.
“Uh… look, Adora, I’m… sorry?” said Mermista, cautious but sincere. She uncrossed her arms, one hand moving to her braid, fiddling with the end of it. Bow had never seen her look so unsure of herself.
“It’s fine,” said Adora. She let out a long, slow breath, and he felt her release some of the tension in her shoulders. “It’s--it’s been a long few days.”
“Do you wanna like… talk about it?” Mermista tried, a little awkward. Bow smiled at her gratefully. 
“I guess I just like--like I always knew the Horde took me in as a baby, you know? I kind of wondered if that had been a lie after I realized they were evil, but… I don’t know. It felt… Like, everything made sense, it was never--it was all for something, you know?” 
“You felt that way even after you defected?” asked Perfuma, gentle and coaxing, but Bow could see the concern in her eyes. She was starting to see what he saw.
“I mean, yeah, kind of,” said Adora, with a helpless shrug. “I knew they were training me to do horrible things, but I didn’t think the way they did it was horrible. Not for me. I mean, apparently they really did take me in as a baby.” 
“But?” prompted Glimmer, coming up on her other side and wrapping an arm around her waist. 
“But I dunno,” said Adora. “Maybe it’s just seeing Catra’s kids, maybe it’s realizing I was just kind of dumped in their laps, but I… I knew it was bad for the other kids. That it wasn’t fair to treat them like that, but--seeing the twins--hearing the way Shadow Weaver--” 
Her shoulders were tense again. Bow thought back to what Glimmer had told him of future-Catra’s initial announcements, back to just what kind of warden they’d had, and almost tensed himself. Hearing the way Shadow Weaver what? He tightened his grip on the tracker pad instinctively, as his hands tried to close into fists. 
“I was never anything to them,” said Adora, cold and biting and sounding more like a soldier than he’d heard since they met her. “I looked at those babies and all I could think about was how much I loved them, the potential they had, how much I wanted to keep them safe, and happy, but the Horde--Shadow Weaver--I wasn’t even a weapon. I wasn’t even that.”
“I mean--” Mermista started, still uncertain, but Adora cut her off with a shake of her head. 
“I wasn’t, because even if--even if you program in a kill switch, you don’t--you don’t…” she trailed off, scowling. Her mouth twisted, and her eyes were shiny with unshed tears, and Bow was going to start crying any second now. “I hate her.”
“You don’t have to,” said Bow, trying to swallow his own tears. “You can, but--”
“Yes I do,” Adora hissed. “How can I not hate her? The things she did--the things she told us--made us think--” 
“It’s normal to care about the person who raised you,” said Glimmer, conciliatory but not quite compassionate. Adora would appreciate the effort, anyway.
“Not when that person is literally evil,” Adora muttered.
“She taught you how to tie your boots,” Bow reminded her softly, trying to bring her back before she could just bury all those emotions without addressing them. Again.
Adora shut her eyes, and her mouth was still twisted, but she was breathing deeply, like she was thinking things through. 
“I hate her,” she said, this time a thin and uncertain mumble. “I’m gonna go check on Catra.”
She pushed back from Bow’s shoulder, shrugging off Glimmer’s arm in the same motion, already turning back towards the door.
“Adora, we should give her space,” said Perfuma, frowning a little. Adora froze like Perfuma would threaten her life if she took another step. “This must be a lot for her to process. If she wants to turn to her friend for support, then--” 
“I’m her friend,” Adora interrupted.
Bow sighed, half exasperated and half fond. Adora had always been territorial, prone to possessiveness of her things. Food, especially, was a problem in the beginning; they kept accidentally sitting on her caches of less-perishable items, until she was able to accept that there were no circumstances or punishments that could threaten her next meal. 
That, or she got better at hiding her bread.
Admittedly, he hadn’t seen that possessiveness directed towards a person yet, but it didn’t surprise him to learn it was there. Adora entered the Best Friend Squad when it was already the three of them, so she had no reason to be jealous of Bow or Glimmer, but if she and Catra were as isolated growing up as he was beginning to suspect…
Well, Princess Prom was starting to make a lot more sense in retrospect. She had been having the exact same crisis Glimmer was, but from opposite sides of the war.
Perfuma seemed a little less amused to discover this particular quirk, but she managed a patient smile when she said, “You two haven’t had much time apart to process since your reunion, right? It’s important that you respect any boundaries she might set, including stepping out of the room for a moment.” 
Adora’s shoulders slumped, her rigid posture relaxing instantly at the reminder. She turned fully back to them, avoiding their eyes.
“I don’t want to talk about the Horde right now,” she told them, quiet but firm. 
“Then we won’t,” said Bow. He made eye contact with each princess in turn to confirm it, frowning pointedly at Frosta until she relented with a scowl. “Boundaries.” 
“Seems to be the theme today,” said Mermista, sighing melodramatically. “Can we at least figure out who fucks the cat?” 
“Mermista!” said Perfuma, clapping her hands over Frosta’s ears. She looked appalled, like she couldn’t believe a princess would use such language, despite what Bow had heard her say about cacti behind closed doors.
“What?” asked Mermista, unimpressed. “She’s like, twelve. She knows what sex is, Perfuma.”
“I can also still hear you,” said Frosta. 
“It’s not about the--it’s about the language,” Perfuma stressed, blushing. “It’s disrespectful!” 
“I think it’s a little more disrespectful to imply Frosta doesn’t know the word ‘fuck’ yet,” said Mermista. 
“I am objecting to the gossip,” said Perfuma, at least removing her hands from Frosta’s ears.  “We don’t need to speculate about any--any--private activities. It’s unproductive and it diminishes Catra’s--”
“Okay, whatever, fine,” said Mermista. “What respectful clues do we have?”
“Well, Catra’s in love,” said Glimmer, looking back at the door consideringly. “Or has been? Her future self wasn’t very clear on that, actually. But we can safely assume she will be in a decade or so, anyway.” 
“And it’s not with Scorpia,” Adora added.
“You’re like super fixated on it not being Scorpia,” said Mermista, raising an eyebrow. “Are you sure you haven’t had a crush? She is kind of your type.”
“My--my type?” Adora spluttered. 
“Yeah, you know, big, strong, muscular,” said Perfuma, smiling. “Totally understandable, she’s dreamy.”
“No,” said Adora, looking mildly horrified at the very suggestion. “I mean--yeah, sure, she has nice muscles, but she’s… No. She’s too nice. We’d never get anything done.”
Mermista shrugged it off, but Glimmer started laughing. Bow blinked, looking at her to see what brought that on.
“I thought you guys meant Catra,” Glimmer explained between giggles.
Bow blinked again. 
He looked down at the tracker pad. 
Future-Adora gazing at the kittens, at Catra, with a melty, absolutely smitten smile. 
The kittens, with their enormous blue eyes that decidedly didn’t match Catra’s shade. 
No. No, it couldn’t be, right? There was no way Adora would have been able to hide the fact that she was in love with… 
Oh, no. She couldn’t hide it, but her stupid over-protective subconsciousness could--
“Bow?” came Glimmer’s voice, echoing faintly. His ears might be ringing.
“Bow, are you okay?” asked Adora, meeting his eyes and yeah that was the exact same shade of blue alright--
“Yep! Grood! I’m gate! I--just remembered I have to ask Catra something! Right now!” he squeaked, handing Glimmer the tracker pad and running for the door before he could give anything away. 
Oh, Catra was going to kill him if he gave something away. 
He stopped at the door, giving them all his most reassuring smile. “Everything is fine!” he said, smooth and confident and totally normal--
He closed the door behind him, locking eyes with a visibly chastised Scorpia, Catra pacing up and down the hallway and breaking off mid-lecture to glare at him for interrupting. 
“It’s Adora?” he shouted, before a single rational thought could stop him. 
Scorpia straightened up like she’d been electrocuted, and Catra’s eyes shot wide before narrowing to slits. 
Oh. 
Right.
The killing him part. 
He squeaked a little as she tackled him, slamming him against the door by his shoulders, but thankfully the claws didn’t come out. At least not the ones holding onto him. 
“What are you talking about?” she demanded, not quite able to mask her panic with anger.
“I--once I realized I couldn’t just like, unrealize, and--does she not know? Does she even know she’s in love with y--”
“Shut up!” Catra hissed, shaking him a little. “Don’t say shit like that, fuck--”
“I don’t think so,” Scorpia volunteered, hovering a little like she was willing to intercede on his behalf. That was kind of nice of her, actually. He’d have to try a little harder to defend her from Adora’s jealous--ohhhhh. 
“We’re not doing this. I’m not having this conversation with you!” said Catra. They were both panicking now, feeding off of each other’s alarm, and none of Bow’s breathing techniques would come to mind when all he could think was what and how long and what does this mean and that claw looks really sharp--
“Adam is blond!” he blurted the second he opened his mouth. 
“So help me, Arrow Boy, if you say one more word--I will break into your closet in the dead of night and sew midsections onto all your shirts if you so much as hint--”
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simpgoose · 2 years
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Alright alright so. Day two ig, this is a poorly thrown together doodle I did late last night as a wind down between my day and bedtime bc I went ahead and randomized. We pulled Blake (right), a pansexual cis man who is my partner's character. (Yesterday, I think I forgot to mention that Lainey is my character and Drew was also my partner's *rip*) Blake is sort of? a main character, in that he is sort of the """viewer's""" main exposure to a specific group of OCs that are all mine, being the Estrellas. Blake himself grew up in the small town that said group of OCs would eventually collect in, and he knew one of the foster kids before she was in the system- Heather (not in the image), who was his best friend. Ultimately, her home life was *fucked*, and when put into the system, she managed to qualify for the specific parameters that the Estrella house was looking for (this will not make very much sense at all but it's important for Blake I am so sorry if this sounds like non-sense) Anyways, his friend changes her name to Summer bc her old name carries a lot of trauma. They grow up together, best friends, dependency issues develop, still close, but he opts to move to California after HS graduation to pursue an acting career. Now, what happens there is dark, so I will put that at the very bottom with TWs and stuff, but for anyone who wants to avoid that, I'll give you a trigger free run-down; Meets girl, falls in love, things go Terribly Wrong, he ends up in a psych facility/rehab center, comes back, while he's dealing with all of that trauma, he experiences a lot of lessons in life and love with said group of OCs and the other people that exist in his home town. He *at current* is set up to end up with Summer after lots of therapy and a third poly member named Maxine, but also Blake is such a lovable goofball of a sunshine himbo that it's hard for us to not want to write him a romance with *everyone* there (in fact, we have given him a happy ending with almost every character in this setting, to the point where we've considered making a dating sim). Blake is a guy that loves to play into the big idiot golden retriever stereotype, but he is actually pretty intelligent when it comes to visual language and cinematography. He knows a surprising amount about color theory and framing, and has a lot of emotional depth and awareness that he's improving through therapy. All Blake wants to do is put more good into the world than bad, and sometimes that results in him taking the brunt of the bad if it means he feels like he's doing some good in the process. - Now. About Ophelia (left, my OC) and what happened in California and why we felt she was the most necessary adjacent OC to place here even though she has very little "screen time". What happens in California is never focused on very heavily in the story aside from how it effects Blake as an otherwise totally optimistic and almost "happily stupid" type of character, but it's written out in such a way that you can understand *why* it effects him the way it does. These topics aren't meant to be taken lightly. -
TW: Drug use mentions, non-explicit su*c*de via OD - - Blake has. An extremely hard time finding acting jobs, as you would probably guess, considering the stereotype. Through a friend, he's been able to crash with some acquaintances in town, who are more than happy to provide him a support system. But he's a small town kid in a new city with complete strangers, albeit friendly ones. One of those strangers is Fawn, who introduces him to the local party scene. There, he meets one of her acquaintances, Ophelia. Ophelia is pretty, charming, witty, and bubbly. She's got cool gray eyes that still feel warm, and he's never felt quite so shy about only having brown-hazel before. Something about her feels familiar in a way none of the people he was staying with did. They spend a long time talking; he finds out she's looking for model work in the city, and he mentions his want to be an actor. They very quickly spiral into dating as two optimistic kids looking for their shot at fame. However. Ophelia happens to have a group of friends at about this exact time who start getting into some *hard* drugs. She's battling self image issues, despite the fact that everyone's encouraging her that she can find model work as she is, and ends up leaning into these for not only escape, but as a means to lose weight. Blake, in one of the deepest mental pits of his life, starts doing this with her. The support group that he was with starts getting shut out as they call attention to the dangers of using this substance. They try to talk to both of them to get help, but with the codependency and addiction, it doesn't sound like reasonable advice to the two of them, and so they run off. They live on the streets for a very short period of time, crashing with some of Ophelia's crowd. Eventually, they do manage to get a very, very, very shitty motel room for a few nights. Blake goes out, trying to look for any work to get any more money, and comes back to a letter that only says "I love you" on it. Blake calls the paramedics and the cops. He calls the friend he had back in his hometown, the one that recommended him to said earlier support group, who drives several hours just to come sit with him. This is Bailey Estrella. She talks to him for a while (and tells him that her friends had been extremely worried about him after he ran off), and eventually convinces him to go to a rehab center. She drops him off, and hangs around with her friends that she had recommended him to so she can keep an eye on him while he gets better. When he eventually does get out of rehab, Bailey helps him move back home after having a small celebration with him and her group of friends. Blake is aiming to go back to college for photography now, having fallen out of love with his movie star dreams. In spite of all of this, Blake really tries to uphold that sunshine demeanor. More than anything, it's a mask to try to be his old self again while he handles his shit. And some days, the lie works so well that he thinks maybe he is that version of Blake again. Other days, he grapples with the idea that he's just animating this ghost of himself for other peoples' sake. Regardless of what his happy ending is, it always results in him accepting that he's been through shit, and it's the choices he makes in spite of it that make him a better version of himself, not pretending to be a happier version of himself.
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atlabeth · 3 years
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hey! i love your zuko fics so much and was wondering if you’d like to write this, because the idea just popped up: maybe a zuko x reader fluff that takes place before/during LOK? maybe they’re reminiscing about their past adventures w the Gaang while helping out the new Team Avatar? idk it’s just that every time I see old zuko it makes me soft and emotional 🥲🔥❤️ anyways, much love! (and don’t feel pressured to do this at all, I was just thinking abt who I could submit this request to, and obvi my first choice was you 💕)
reminiscence - zuko x fem!reader
summary: just because you and your husband are retired doesn’t mean you don’t have amazing advice for the new team avatar.
a/n: this is so cute omg!! thank you so much for requesting this and thank you for much for your kind words i'm honored <33 im so sorry this took so long
sorry im posting so much lately im trying to stop slacking and publish things that have been wips for over a month sdkjfh
wc: 1.3k
warning(s): none bc i choose to ignore the news of zaheer’s plan right after this scene
-
Retirement was… nice.
You had spent your childhood fighting with the Avatar to end the Hundred Year War, a feat that was only made more difficult with your Fire Nation roots and connection to the banished prince. But all that’s well ends well, and you ended up getting your happy ending together — you had to fight hard for it, though.
You married Zuko at nineteen, three years after he ascended to the throne, and spent the subsequent years balancing your duties as Fire Lady and taking care of your daughter. Ruling the Fire Nation was a lot, but you knew you could get through anything with your husband at your side.
When he told you his plans to abdicate the throne, you were more than supportive. One of Zuko’s biggest fears was becoming his father, and by giving up his position willingly to Izumi, it guaranteed that he wouldn’t fall victim to the power-obsessed ways of his ancestors. It also gave him a well-deserved break after decades of being Fire Lord, and you were more than ready to get out of the world of Fire Nation politics. You had sat through enough meetings to fill multiple lifetimes.
But just because the two of you weren’t as involved in every day affairs of the world didn’t mean that you were completely out of it. No, that was far from the truth. You and Zuko were still some of the most important people in all of the nations, which meant it wasn’t a rare occurrence for your husband to be called off on some sort of mission.
One such mission was stopping the Order of the Red Lotus for the second time; Zuko had been part of the team that stopped them from kidnapping Avatar Korra as a child, so it was no surprise that he had been called to help for a second time. You knew even in his old age that your husband was powerful, but you couldn’t help but feel concerned about everything he was doing.
This concern was ultimately what led you to join Zuko on his trip to meet with Chief Beifong and Chief Tonraq in the Misty Palms Oasis. He had originally been against your involvement, claiming that the Red Lotus was far too dangerous, and he didn’t want to risk you getting injured in any way. You, of course, weren’t having it. “The Avatar’s in trouble, and I’d like to think I know a few things about getting out of trouble.”
One thing was certain after you arrived — it had been far too long since you had ridden on the back of a dragon. You truly adored Druk, and you felt bad for everyone that would never have the opportunity.
After conversing with Lin and Tonraq inside, you all exited to greet the new Team Avatar. If what you were told was true, then they had been through quite a lot since leaving Zaofu. For as long as you had been involved in foreign affairs, you had never met Avatar Korra nor her friends, so you didn’t know what to expect — an awestruck boy that could barely speak wasn’t at the top of your list though.
“Oh my gosh. It’s Lord Zuko and Lady Y/N. I can’t believe it!” He stared at the two of you with wide eyes, his voice getting higher and higher as he whimpered. He looked like he was going to fall over until another black-haired boy pulled him out of the way, his tone apologetic.
“Uh, forgive my brother,” he said as he put his fist against his open palm, his brother following suit. “We’re just really honored to meet you both.”
“It’s no problem,” you smiled as you and Zuko returned the greeting. It had been years since someone had reacted that way towards you, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t amuse you. “It’s a pleasure to meet you as well.”
The two boys straightened again as the taller one gestured to them each in turn. “I’m Mako, and this is Bolin. We’re Korra’s friends.”
“Ah, she’s got her own Team Avatar?” You inquired with a twinkle in your eye. “You know, I traveled with Avatar Aang years back along with my husband.”
“Of course I know!” Bolin exclaimed. “Oh, I’ve heard so many stories about your adventures, they’re all so amazing!” His eyes widened and you actually thought that he was going to fall over. “Oh, oh, could you tell us about some of the things you went through?”
“Bolin, we really shouldn’t bother them—” Mako started, but you laughed and waved it off.
“I assure you, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s not often I get to relive my journeys to such avid listeners. What would you like to hear about?”
He thought for a couple seconds then shot back up again. “What was it like when you escaped the Boiling Rock together? You guys were the first people to ever break out, right? That had to be amazing!”
You and Zuko both laughed as you shot him a look. “It was… interesting,” he said.
“By interesting, he means it was a complete disaster,” you corrected. “Everywhere something could’ve gone wrong, it went wrong. They had originally come there to rescue Sokka’s dad, but instead they found Suki and I. Then Zuko got found out and thrown into prison, our first escape plan failed, Sokka almost got found out, Azula showed up… it was honestly a miracle we made it out at all.”
“It wasn’t that bad!” he protested. “Getting thrown into prison was part of the plan, we wouldn’t have been able to get the cooler out if I hadn’t been found out.”
“I guess I can’t complain,” you chuckled. “I did get to punch you a couple times.”
“They are so cool,” Bolin whispered as the two of you went on in the background. He elbowed Mako in the shoulder and gestured towards the couple with his head. “Come on, ask them something! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!”
“I’m not going to ask them something, Bolin—”
“Excuse me, my brother has something he wants to ask too!” Mako shot him a dirty look which quickly disappeared when you and Zuko turned to him attentively.  
“Oh, um…” He coughed and scratched his head. “I guess.. is there any advice you have for us? With this whole Team Avatar thing, I mean.” You smiled at Mako and took Zuko’s hand.
“The friendships you forge during your journey are the most important thing — they’re the things that will keep you going during your darkest moments, and they will last a lifetime. There will be mountains and valleys, ebbs and flows, but no matter what, you will hold an unbreakable bond.”
You felt Zuko squeeze your hand and turned your smile on him as you returned the sentiment then nodded for him to continue. “Never take anything for granted, and trust in fate. You’re where you are for a reason — everything will end up working out in the end.”
You grinned and kissed him on the cheek, humming in agreement. “It did, didn’t it?”
-
After a few more minutes of talking with the two brothers, they went off to join the rest of their group. It was strange being on the outside of it all after how intense your childhood was, but it was… refreshing not to have the weight of the world on your shoulders anymore.
“The world’s in good hands with them,” you murmured as you leaned your head on Zuko’s shoulder.
“They all have that same fire you had when I first met you,” Zuko chuckled. You watched the four of them conversing and a smile graced your lips.
“Oh? Then I think the world’s in very good hands.”
-
perm tag list: @dv0412 @siriuslyslyslytherin
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unohanadaydreams · 3 years
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Polyandrous, sexy, hot relationship between fem reader and Shinji, Rose and Kensei😈😈😈🔥🔥🔥 (sorry, I had a typo in the previous ask😓🤭🙃😄)
Oh my god. Like, imagine being the filling between three captains….real hot girl shit.
Features: Smut, a lil angst, and me bending my back to make these three bang reader and each other.
this is fantasy not a how-to guide on poly relationships thanks.
largely unedited bc its thirst post tower content, and pretty much all consent is implied instead of strictly stated. i checked with all 4 of them though and they told ME it’s consensual. Except Kensei. He told me to fuck off ):
Triple Threat Team-up
(Shinji Hirako x Rose Otoribashi x Kensei Muguruma x F!Reader):
How it seeded:
The relationship started with Rose. He wooed you with his flowery words and romantic fashion, paired well with his cool demeanor. Although some of his ideas on love are dated, he’s not one you could call traditional.
As a group, the vizards have endured much and gained little unless they gave to each other. When Shinji walks in on you and Rose naked, using his shunpo to grab a CD before leaving, you find it odd. Rose does not.
He admits that most of the vizards have been some form of...thing at some time in the past. “You can’t be too shocked,” he says. “It’s hard to stay warm in a warehouse.” The phrasing is odd, letting you know there’s something more he means than winter temperatures.
How it took root:
Shinji is odd too. Casual, yet guarded in a way that becomes awkward should he be forced to relax. There is always a joke or gross face or biting word that keeps him at a distance.
The trick is alcohol, like it is for most people. Rose displays you, a bloom with glistening petals and fragrant scent at every private party he arranges. And eventually, Shinji stops finding reasons to flee, his fingers skimming your petal-soft skin as he kisses Rose.
The two of you lure Shinji in, kissing him softly, feeding him well, and paying him attention when he knocks on the window. Who doesn’t love a stray coaxed into domestication?
Rose speaks like he’s telling a story, his eyes most often on yours, his calloused fingers feeling their way down your body until you have to break the eye contact. You never feel like he’s playing you--using you like one does an instrument--, not at all. If anything, you feel as though he’s teaching you a dance, his steady instruction bringing you to revelation each lesson.
Shinji’s eyes are always, always moving to drink in your body as he moves with you, his mouth just as restless. He can never settle on the perfect position, always toying with having more of his body on yours versus more of your body on display. Each time is a revolving puzzle of moments that end well and make him want to test again.
Together, they are easily overwhelming, even when their focus is on each other. Rose’s proclivity for words gets Shinji’s skin flushed as much as yours. Shinji’s restless approach to sex keeps your eyes excited, the play of their bodies combining with the rise and fall of their voices to make for a thrilling, climactic show.
How it sprouted:
If anyone has taken the repositioning to the Seireitei like a bullet, it’s Kensei. He’s not one for shows of sentimentality, leaving the vizards in the human world be, half to keep from missing them and half to stay sane away from them. And the separation feels cruel, a sloppy sever somewhere inside of him that he refuses to see.
The news of Rose and Shinji sharing you wrinkles his nose at first. Really? Is it some kind of middle finger to the “Man”? Seems ostentatious, how open they are about it, like shoving their tongues down your throat in his personal quarters is acceptable. Sure, he’s cooking with his full, undivided attention on the kitchen, but Kensei still has ears. No way would he purposefully hone in on the wet sounds and mewling of you being pressed in between their bodies in the other room as his sauce breaks.
After a sound lecture, Rose and Shinji seem to get the message. Sort of. The couple nights a week that they insist are Kensei’s turn to cook, a nostalgic bit that squeezes his heart enough to agree to, still happen. But it’s just you and Kensei.
And eventually, Kensei can’t help but ask the questions he wants to know, albeit fueled by visible frustration. It’s aggressive and a bit mocking, how he asks, but you answer freely. Which doesn’t help. Just like waking up wet in the pants and sweaty night after night at the thought of picking you up and fucking you in front of Shinji and Rose to teach them a lesson on home etiquette doesn’t help.
The need and want and well of shitty fucking loneliness comes to a head when Rose and Shinji invite themselves back to dinner one night, Shinji’s hand toying with your thigh as Rose whispers something that glazes your eyes.
One of the pots over boils when Shinji palms between your legs with one hand, his other coaxing a saucer of sake past your lips. Rose is between you and Shinji, his fingers kneading your waists.
That’s it, really. The food getting fucked over by his own inattention. The way your thighs are shaking as your kimono is un-tucked. The far too comfortable looks on Shinij and Rose’s degenerate fucking faces.
He makes what he’s been dreaming about for months into a reality, your squeaking morphing into low moans as he pounds into you, picking you up and away from the other two vizards each time they reach for you. They even beg a little and Kensei ignores their panting, their playing with one another, and pretends he’s teaching them a lesson.
How it blossomed:
Alcohol, food, and sex can’t soothe every tear, but they patch up enough to keep the wheels of your relationship greased. The sober statement that you are all in a relationship with each other does hit one of you with a splitting force at times. It’s not uncommon for someone to pull away, unsure how much their needed, wanted, or meant for such a thing.
But there are always enough hands to come around them, reassuring them back.
Kensei doesn’t lose his prickly sensibilities, almost never letting more than one of you touch him at once. He favors positions where he’s able to stand or kneel above one or two people, close enough be inside someone, but far enough to get away should be too much for him. Kensei is most uncomfortable fucking Rose; the dirty words constantly dripping from Rose’s lips and his eyes so focused on Kensei’s over stimulating. Kensei usually presses a hand over his face, muffling his look and words in one swift move.
He likes everyone having their place, approaching sex with three other people like a scene he’s seen before. Kensei loves attention, too. Rarely, he’ll let that show. Dropping his need to be in charge, he’ll let all three of you treat him to the full weight of your bodies and all that comes with it, usually three hands tugging cum to spill over his stomach as all of your mouths leave dark marks over the span of his body. Usually, he wants someone to drive into or a head to force deeper on his cock.
Rose loves those times the most, where everyone is stripped bare of their baggage, just bodies reaching for one another. Like those concerts where everyone is squished together, all feeling the music separately but together. His enjoyment of having some control is less about the power and more about the flow--it’s easier to make the ending come at just the right time when there isn’t a meaty hand squishing his face into the mattress. Anything that leaves his mouth free pleases him, especially if he’s able to drape himself over or in between bodies, guiding them closer to orgasm with verbal and physical encouragement.
Shinji doesn’t care about the positions or pace or anything outside of him being involved. He’s there and that’s vulnerability in itself. Saying that, the playing that thrills him most is the kind that makes him feel like he’s spilling over from contact alone. His body pressed under yours, his cock sliding at your back as you’re fucked above him. Or someone being hugged to him as he lays on his side, both he and them being fucked closer. His mouth is always happy to be at work, the flat of his tongue flicking his piercing over hot, puffy flesh.
Over all, your sex life probably has a color coated calendar--courtesy of Kensei--and you’re often doing overtime if you’re counting orgasms as work.
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arvinsescape · 3 years
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could you please write something like tom and actress reader obviously like each other but they haven't taken it further yet bc reader is scared it will mess up their friendship but they're still flirting with each other at comic con panels or interviews for spiderman? 🙏
Flirts.
A/N: I love this, thank you so much for sending it in and thank you for your patience in me getting back to you. I hope you enjoy 💕
Warnings: Suggestive content.
You and Tom had been close for years, ever since you met on the set of Civil War, you had a close bond. He was there for some hard points in his life and vice versa, you kept each other grounded. Most people thought you were together, theories that you'd been together for a long time, engaged even, the two of you would laugh it off.
Of course you were in love with him, you had feelings for him, had for a long time. But you had such a close bond that you just couldn't jeopardize, not for anything. You also didn't wanna make things awkward because you had a few films left to film together.
You had a very flirty relationship and this extended to interviews, Zendaya had asked multiple times why you weren't together.
"Z, I've been over this." You groaned, you were in your trailer having a few drinks together.
"Yeah and I'd understand if it wasn't so obvious that you were into each other." She said with a laugh.
"I don't know," you groaned. "Why are you hassling me, he hasn't said or done anything either." You tried to end the conversation.
"I'm talking to you about it, I don't need to talk to Tom, it's so obvious how he feels, no one needs to ask."
"Z, please can we not?"
"You are so close though."
"Which is why I don't wanna ruin it."
"Y/N, I'm close to Tom but you two are different."
**
"So Y/N? Celebrity crush?" The interviewer said.
"I would have to say Tom." You said and Tom looked at you with a wide smile.
"I knew it." He fist pumped the air. "You're mine to." He said with a wink.
"Oh sorry, I meant Hardy." You smirked and Tom almost visibly deflated.
"Well that's my dreams shattered." Tom said and everyone laughed. "I feel emotional wounded."
"Aw it's okay, I'll keep in my heart that I'm your crush."
"I changed my mind."
"No take backs Tom."
**
"I have a question for Y/N." A fan said as they stood up at comic con. "How do you do all those scenes with Tom when he's topless, do you get distracted?"
"Oh massively, all the time. It's a wonder these films ever get finished." You answered as Sebastian laughed.
"In between all the flirting these two do, I agree, it's a wonder we ever finish filming." Anthony chimed in and you laughed. "You should see her face when Tom walks around set, just love eyes all the time." He added.
"That's good to know." Tom laughed as he placed a hand on your knee which sent the fans into a frenzy.
"Like this one can talk," Sebastian said. "He literally looks at her like no one else exists, I am convinced they are dating and it's the best kept secret ever."
"Are you?" The host asked the two of you and everyone watched as you both smiled at each other.
"No." You answered at the same time. "Just really close." Tom added and your heart did a flip, he didn't use the word 'friends' like you expected him to, like he usually did.
"You know, we had to do this scene and Y/N here decided to do her own stunt and somehow knocked herself out," Anthony started and you groaned. "And this one?" He said as he clapped Tom's shoulder. "Wow, you should've seen him, you'd have thought she'd nearly died."
"I was just making sure she was okay." Tom defended himself.
"It's because he's in love with me obviously." You said as you leant your head on Tom's shoulder and he put his head on top of yours.
"Secrets out." He teased, placing a kiss to your head as you laughed and playfully shoved him.
**
"So who's seen Y/N's recent film?" The interviewer asked and almost all the cast raised their hands. "Because there was a lot of her in that." He added.
"Tom's seen it loads, but he always watches it alone." Anthony teased as you laughed.
"It was a good film!" Tom said in defence.
"Oh yeah? Which bit is your favourite." Anthony asked.
"You know the bit with the-"
"Y/N's sex scene?" Anthony interjected as Tom laughed embarrassed.
"Yeah that bit was pretty good." Tom said through a laugh, both of your hands where now covering your face in embarrassment as you shook your head.
**
"So are you both aware that people write fanfiction about the two of you?" The interviewer asked and Tom burst into a fit of giggles, you kept a straight face as you looked at the interviewer.
"Yes."
"Oh really? How'd you know?"
"I write it." You said as a laugh escaped your throat.
"Based on real life events." Tom added and you both burst into laughter as his head fell on your shoulder and a hand rested on your thigh, high enough to get your heart racing.
"Have you ever read any?" The interviewer asked, amused look on his face.
"Oh loads." You said sarcastically.
"It's just about the only reading I do aside from reading a script." Tom snorted.
**
"You and Tom are close?" Graham Norton asked as he pulled up a picture you'd taken and posted to Instagram.
"Yeah, we are." You said with a smile.
"Be honest here, is there anything else going on?"
"No." You shook your head.
"Seriously?"
"Yup. Just really close."
**
It'd been a long day of promo, everyone was quite tired. You yawned as you sat on the couch in the dressing room, Tom joining you.
"You tired?" He asked as he looked at you.
"Yeah." You yawned as you held back another yawn.
"Come here." He said as he coaxed you to lay your head in his lap, something you'd done a thousand times. What you weren't expecting were Tom's hands massaging your scalp and the way you instantly relaxed into it.
"You should get some sleep." He said as he lent over to look at you and gave you a kiss on the forehead, yet another action you weren't prepared for. You were to tired to fight or question it as you felt yourself succumb to sleep.
**
"Now, Y/N L/N," Graham started with. "The last time you were on my sofa I felt lied to." He said and you placed your face in your hand, knowing what was coming as you heard him laugh.
"Did you?" You squeaked out as Graham pulled up a picture from the other night.
"Yes, now if we study this picture for a second. Daniel Radcliffe what would you say is going on here?" Graham teased as you fanned a hand over your face to cool your rising temperature.
"I mean it looks like Y/N's kissing Tom Holland but I could be wrong." Daniel shrugged as the audience and the other celebs burst into laughter.
"It does doesn't it. Y/N, you told me you were close and nothing else was going on but can you tell me what was happening here?" He asked as you looked at him, smiling in embarrassment.
"I, we, I don't." You stuttered out.
"Leave the poor girl alone, she looks like she's about to combust." Emily Blunt defended you as you shook your head and took a deep breath.
"I technically didn't lie, not when I was last here. We really were just friends then." You said.
"So you're not now?" Graham clarified.
"Sorry?" You tried to dodge the question.
"Just friends, you're not just friends now?" He said with that signature grin.
"No." You huffed in defeat as everyone erupted into squeals and cheers.
"When did this happen?" He pried and you smiled.
"Around eighteen months ago." You clarified.
"And who made the first move?"
"He did. Well, no, I suppose we both did." You said. "It was after the last movie came out. We had a bit of an argument about something and the next thing I know we were kissing, I'm not really sure who kissed who first." You said and Graham laughed.
"But now you're official?" Graham asked and you nodded.
"I mean they've been in love for years, trust me. I'm happy they decided to give into it." Robert Downey Jr said from next to you as you smiled shyly. He was here promoting a different movie and it had been good too see him again.
"So is the other rumour true?" Graham asked. To say you'd been together for eighteen months you kept things pretty quiet, both being private people. You never denied the rumours but you hadn't properly confirmed them either.
"What rumour?" You asked, knowing exactly which one he was probably talking about.
"You know," he said as he held his cards up to his face, feigning being discreet. "The engagement rumours?" He said as you placed a hand on your face to hide your embarrassed laugh and smile, holding your left hand up for the audience to see and when they did, they erupted yet again into a fit of screams and cheers.
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pufflyhallows · 4 years
Text
Getaway
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Gif not mine
Pairing: Fred Weasley x reader
Summary: Business is going bad after the war and Fred is not feeling so great, so you decide to cheer him up with a special trip.
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, smut, language, tiny tiny bit of angst, still fluffy tho
a/n: this is my FIRST smut EVER so... be nice? also, Fred fucking LIVES bc I’m in denial forever lol
Word count: 4,3k
********
You wanted to surprise Fred.
He had been feeling down lately. Ever since he and George reopened the shop after the war, things had been a little tough. The movement was still quite slow, given the fact that people were still recovering from the war, mourning their lost ones and starting new lives. It was a difficult time for everyone, and of course it affected Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes as well.
What ached your heart the most was the fact that there wasn’t much you could do to help him. Every day you watched as he took longer to get out of bed in the morning, how he sounded slower and quieter when talking to you and, the worst part, how he acted quite mechanic when doing his chores around the shop, the same ones he enjoyed so much in the past and had always gotten done with a bright smile on his face. And although he never stopped caring for you or being loving to you, the bedroom had become… inactive. And you missed it. You missed being intimate with your boyfriend, but every time you tried to initiate it, he would softly decline, claiming to be too tired. You believed it. You could see he was indeed exhausted. And not only physically, but mentally too. Perhaps the latter was actually the one weighing more.
George, however, was quite the opposite. He kept his optimism high and was always the first to wake up every morning, excited with the new day and new possibilities. He would often go out and promote the shop, talk to people and sometimes even manage to bring a customer in.
This big difference between them worried you. No, you did not expect the twins to act the same, but you hoped in secret that Fred would follow his brother’s steps and cheer up a bit.
Cheer up. Yeah. That was exactly what he needed. And what better way to cheer up someone than a surprise trip? That’s how you were going to take his mind off of work. With Hermione’s help, you planned a very romantic weekend trip out of town. You talked to George beforehand, of course, but he assured you he could take care of the shop by himself for two days. He agreed Fred needed this.
“It’s not like we’re getting many customers anyway,” he had said.
So, as Friday approached, you felt the excitement building up. You managed to act completely nonchalant around him, making sure he didn’t suspect a thing. It wasn’t a big, expensive hotel because you knew he would worry about money and that was the opposite of what you wanted for this trip. Hermione had helped you pick a small, comfy hotel that was quite charming and fit your pocket perfectly. You wanted to make sure Fred felt loved, cared for and relaxed. There was also a little extra surprise inside your suitcase that you really hoped he would like…
What you didn’t know was that Fred felt guilty. He reckoned he hadn’t been the boyfriend you deserved lately, but he couldn’t help it. The stress was almost eating him alive and his mind was always wandering back to the shop, worrying about its future. You had been so kind and patient with him, he knew you deserved better than that. The whole thing was snowballing and sometimes he couldn’t see it ending.
That Friday, when you got home from work, the shop was still open and there was actually a customer inside, talking with George. You felt relief wash over you, because you knew what that meant: Fred was probably in a good mood.
You walked straight to the flat, not daring to interrupt George, but you stopped in the middle of the stairs to watch. He was speaking with such enthusiasm, showing and explaining his products to the young boy, that it filled you with pride. You caught his eyes for a brief moment and noticed the smallest of smirks appear on his lips. Smiling back, you nodded at him. Fred was nowhere to be seen, though, so you went upstairs.
There was a delicious scent coming from the kitchen. The older twin was there, cooking. You smiled to yourself at the sight. His favorite The Weird Sisters record was playing somewhere in the flat, adding a familiar, comfortable feel to the whole scene. Fred’s back was facing you while he chopped… carrots? on the counter. He didn’t seem to notice your presence just yet, so you took advantage of that. Placing your bag on the nearest chair, you walked in quiet steps towards your boyfriend. The fresh mint aroma coming from him meant he had probably just showered. Oh, and how you missed showering with him.
You couldn’t refrain your smile from growing even bigger once you noticed Fred’s body was swinging from side to side, so imperceptibly that you almost missed it. Carefully, you wrapped your arms around him from behind, resting your cheek on his back. You felt him tense up for a mere second before realizing who it was. He soon relaxed, letting go of the knife and placing his clean hand on yours.
“Didn’t hear you coming in,” he stated, voice low and raspy.
You hummed in response and placed a soft kiss on the nape of his neck. Fred turned around and briefly met your lips with his.
“It’s gonna take a while. Why don’t you go take a bath?”
“I will,” you nodded, running your hand from his chest to his shoulder and squeezing it gently. “How was your day?”
He shrugged. “Okay.”
“Okay”, you repeated. “Well, I hope I can make it better. I have a surprise for you after dinner.”
“A surprise?”
“Yes. I have an idea of how we can spend your days off.”
“Hm… Making plans already, are we?”
“Very good plans, yes. But you’ll have to wait until dinner.”
“Or you could tell me right now so I won’t have to.”
“But where’s the fun in that?”
You smirked and gave him another peck on the lips before rushing off the kitchen and leaving your boyfriend to his curiosity and imagination.
The warm bath made you think about a lot of things and you came to realize you were very lucky. The war was over and there you were, taking a bath in your boyfriend’s flat, the person you loved the most in the world. So many people lost their loved ones, their homes, their entire lives in that war. You knew you had many reasons to feel happy and should not take them for granted. Life was good for you right now, and you acknowledged it, promising to yourself that you were going to enjoy it the best you could, with Fred by your side.
George joined the two of you for dinner, which turned out to be the best you had in months. Not because of the food, although it was perfect, but because it felt like everything was back to normal, like all the meals you had shared before the war. Maybe it was the idea of a day off and the mention of a surprise from you, but you could see that Fred was already less gloomy or aloof.
After the meal, as if sensing you wanted to reveal your plans to Fred, George excused himself to his bedroom, claiming he still had to finish some work. You wished him goodnight, not missing the discrete wink he gave you.
“So…” you started, watching as Fred emptied his glass of pumpkin juice. “Remember when I said I had an idea on how to spend your days off?”
“Oh, yes. The surprise.”
“Well… I figured you could use a little rest from everything, so I made a reservation at a very nice hotel for the two of us to spend the weekend at.”
“You what?” Fred asked, a small smile starting to grace his lips.
“The portkey is set for our departure at 10 a.m. tomorrow.”
“But-”
“Nope. No buts,” you shook your head. “I have already packed our bags.”
“Y/N, doll, I don’t know what to say.”
“Tell me I’m amazing, the best thing that ever happened to you, an angel sent from heaven…  Something humble like that.”
Fred chuckled, that contagious sound you missed hearing so much. “You’re amazing. You are the best thing that ever happened to me, a true angel sent from heaven.”
“I know! We’re gonna have so much fun,” you smiled excitedly, clasping your hands together.
“What exactly are your plans for us, though?” your boyfriend questioned, curiosity dripping from his lips.
“Oh, you’ll find out once we’re there.”
“The surprise doesn’t end here, I see.”
“Exactly. I have everything planned, baby.”
The look in Fred’s eyes seemed to indicate he had an idea of what you had planned, but he did not say a word about it. He would like to see the surprise reveal itself in the right moment. He wasn’t going to spoil your plans in any way.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You always had your doubts when it came to ads, but this time you had to admit this was spot on. The hotel looked exactly like its pictures and descriptions.
“Mr. and Mrs. Weasley?” the receptionist asked as soon as you stepped in the lobby.
It was something so small, so simple, but it made your heart flutter and stomach fill with those restless butterflies. Mrs. Weasley. Were you ever going to become that? You wondered if Fred even noticed the little misunderstanding.
“Um,” you cleared your throat. “Actually, it’s just one Weasley. Fred Weasley. I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”
Your slight flustered manner didn’t go unnoticed by Fred. Despite the obvious nervousness, he thought it was rather cute. In fact, he liked to hear you be called that. Perhaps he should do something about it…
“Oh, I apologize. Mr. Weasley and Miss Y/L/N,” the receptionist corrected herself as she checked the reservation’s book. “You’re right on time, your room is ready for you. I just need your wands for ID confirmation before I give you your key.”
Both of you handed your wands to the young woman behind the desk and she did as she was supposed to. Sooner than you had anticipated, you were in the lovely suite you had reserved.
Fred placed the small handbag on the bed – blessed be the extension charm, that’s all you had to carry for that trip – and walked around the room curiously. You went straight for the big window and opened the curtains. There it was. The view you had seen on the ad and that had made you instantly choose this hotel.
“Fred,” you called softly, looking behind you. “Come see.”
Your boyfriend let go of the catalog on the nightstand and approached you, eyeing the outside in awe.
“Wow,” he breathed. “It’s beautiful.”
“Isn’t it?”
When making the reservation, you were met with the question: would you like a room with view to the street/village or to the beach? And you chose the beach, although the village was a lovely sight. Now, seeing Fred’s reaction, you were absolutely sure you had made the right choice.
The hotel was in a small village where both wizards and muggles lived. With a little help from magic, the wizards could go unnoticed and the muggles lived everyday life without a single clue of the existence of such peculiar neighbors. The beach was right behind the village, and your room being in the back of the hotel, you had a wonderful privileged view of nature’s beauty.
“Wanna go down there?” you asked.
“What’s in your plans?” he asked back, switching his gaze from the window to you.
“Beach,” you replied with a small smile. “Basically the entire day at the beach, lunch at a muggle restaurant down there too. But dinner here.”
“I’ll follow your script, doll.”
Fred placed his hand on your waist and pulled you closer, pressing his lips ever so gently on yours. You instantly let go of the curtains so you could run your fingers through his soft hair. The light fabric fell back to its place, covering the windows again and leaving the room a little darker than before. Fred’s gentle kiss wasn’t so gentle anymore.
No, not yet.
You broke the kiss and pulled back, biting your lip as you started to feel that you might not be able to wait until the right time for your surprise.
“I’m starving,” you whispered against his lips.
“Me too,” he pulled you closer again.
“Let’s go, then.” You managed to get out of his embrace and grab the handbag before heading to the bathroom to change into your bathing suit.
A hungry Fred was left standing by the big window.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been hard.
It had been hard seeing you in so little clothing, dripping wet, skin glistening as droplets of water reflected the sunlight. But Fred managed.
All he had in his mind every time he saw you leaving the water was how he wanted to take you then and there. He had to distract himself from those thoughts, paying attention to what you were saying but not too much to your moving lips. He knew you had something planned and he was appreciative of how much effort you had put in this weekend for him. That was the only reason he wasn’t indulging to his not-so-pure thoughts.
Lunch was a good distraction too, specially since you had to convince a muggle child she had imagined it when she saw Fred stop his falling fork mid-air.
Now, as the two of you walked hand in hand back to the hotel, he wondered if he was going to be rewarded for the self-control test he had just passed. You were humming a song as you observed the houses, trying to guess which ones were muggles and which ones were wizards.
“What’s next?” he asked.
“Dinner!” you answered excitedly. “But, if I were you, I wouldn’t go overboard.”
“Why, if I may ask?” but Fred already suspected why.
“Well… there might be plans for after dinner as well.”
Fred held your hand tighter and pulled you towards the hotel in a faster pace. You chuckled, feeling the excitement grow bigger and bigger.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Dessert?” the waiter asked as he took the empty plates from your table.
“No, thank you,” Fred replied before you had the chance. “We’re calling it a night, aren’t we, sweetheart?”
“Actually,” you smirked at your boyfriend before looking at the waiter. “I’d like chocolate pudding, please.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
As soon as the waiter left, Fred gave you a look.
“What?” you asked nonchalantly.
“I thought you said we wouldn’t go overboard.”
“I’m not going overboard. I had a small plate,” you shrugged.
“Right,” Fred sighed, bouncing his leg under the table.
When your chocolate pudding came, you grabbed the spoon and took a small amount to your mouth. Fred watched your every move, arms crossed and brows slightly furrowed as he saw you slowly lick the spoon. You pretended you didn’t know he was watching, eyes on the tiny bowl in front of you, and you mouthed another spoon, unintentionally getting pudding all over your lips.
Your boyfriend gulped as he watched you run your thumb over your lower lip, getting rid of the chocolate there, and gently suck on it.
“For fuck’s sake, Y/N,” he mumbled.
“Hm?” you looked at him innocently.
“Just eat the damn thing.”
“You want some?” you raised the spoon at him.
“Yes, I want some.”
You felt your cheeks burn just a little bit with his remark, heart begin to race as the ideas for what you wanted to do to him tonight started to flood your mind.
“If you wait patiently, you might get what you want,” you teased, looking back at the bowl and already serving another spoon, which you quickly brought to your lips, licking all the content off of it.
Fred shook his head, one corner of his lips going upwards ever so slightly, eyes glued on you.
“You sure you don’t want to taste it?” you offered again, lips glistening as you cleaned them with your tongue.
“I will taste it,” his eyes pierced through your body and suddenly the hotel was too hot.
You had barely served the last spoon of pudding when Fred stood up and let the waiter know you were headed to the room.
“I haven’t finished yet,” you protested and he immediately took the last spoon from your hand and into his mouth.
“Now you have,” he said as he pulled you from the chair.
The way back to the suite felt much longer than it actually was, but as soon as you reached the door, Fred’s lips were on yours. You had trouble to get the key with your boyfriend’s hands all over you, pulling your body hard against his.
“Fred,” you breathed, stepping back. “There’s another surprise.”
Before he could say anything, you unlocked the door and went inside.
“Sit down,” you slowly pushed him to the bed. “And close your eyes.”
Fred complied with no protests, but you could see he was getting flustered, probably guessing what was coming.
You blew out most of the candles illuminating the room and left only a few to create the romantic atmosphere you wanted. You went to the bathroom and changed into the expensive lacy lingerie you had bought for this exact occasion. It was red, a color you had learned Fred was very fond of when it came to this kind of clothing, and had one small, delicate bow right between your breasts.
“Are your eyes closed?” you asked from the bathroom, hand on the doorknob.
“Yeah,” you heard in response.
“No peeking ‘til I tell you to,” you warned.
“…‘kay.”
You opened the door and stepped out of the bathroom. Fred was still sitting on the bed, one leg bouncing impatiently, and a slight frown between his eyebrows.
Slowly, you approached the bed and stood right in front of him.
“Open your eyes,” you whispered.
As soon as he did, Fred sucked in a shaky, quiet breath. He eyed you from head to toe, not hiding his astonishment.
“Baby,” he mumbled in a deep voice, already feeling his pants get a little too tight as his eyes still traveled through your entire figure.
“Do you like it?” you asked.
“Mm-hmm,” he nodded, biting his bottom lip.
“Good,” you smiled, placing your hands on each of his shoulders. “Now let me show you how proud I am to be your girlfriend.”
Your lips met Fred’s in a slow, deep kiss as you climbed the bed and straddled him, your arms thrown around his neck. Fred let out a soft moan when he felt your weight against his lap, his hands going up your back, fingertips sending shivers down your spine as they searched for the bra clasp. However, you stopped them and placed them back on your hips.
“Not so fast,” you whispered against his lips.
Before he could protest, you kissed him again, now pushing him all the way back to lay down on the bed. Hovering above him, you started pulling up his shirt, which he quickly got rid of for you. You chuckled. Maybe you weren’t the only one who had missed this.
Now that you had free access to his torso, you began to place soft, wet kisses on his neck, slowly moving down to his chest and stomach, painfully taking your time.
You could feel Fred’s breathing get deeper and deeper as you kissed his abs, working your way down to his pants. Once there, you stopped the kisses for a brief moment, so you could focus on getting rid of that piece of fabric. Again, Fred quickly helped you out until you were both just in your underwear.
The sight sent goosebumps through your body and you inevitably bit your lower lip. He was already so hard, you felt the anticipation building up inside you.
You decided to torture him for a little bit – just a little bit – and carried on with the kisses, not taking off his underwear quite yet. However, Fred’s impatience was growing and he didn’t think he would manage to wait for too long. His hand found your hair and he started stroking it, running his fingers through it, a disguised way to guide your head to where he needed you the most. You realized his intentions, but you did not stop him. You let him take you where he wanted and soon your lips found his still covered length.
“Shit, Y/N.”
You smirked.
Slowly, you started pulling down the last piece of clothing until you completely freed him. He was so beautiful. You still had a silly smile on your face as you ran your tongue all the way up from the base to the tip, where you placed a gentle kiss. Fred’s soft moan reached your ears, a beautiful sound that made you even more wet.
You took him in your mouth and started sucking the tip in a slow, teasing pace, while your hand loosely stroked him. You didn’t want him to cum yet. You wanted him to last. And you were going to make him last.
Fred’s hand never left your hair, and he began to slightly pull it, asking for more. He needed more.
“Y/N,” he moaned. “Y/N, please.”
You ignored him and kept going in that insanely slow pace, taking your time. What was the hurry?
You heard a low groan, and felt him move his hips against you. You stopped.
“Behave yourself, Weasley.”
“Baby… Please.”
You smirked again, giving him one last stroke, and you let go of him.
Fred looked at you in a way you hadn’t seen in a while. His eyes were dark, full of pure lust. But also desperation and discontent with the sudden lack of touch.
You crawled on the bed until your face was right above his, and you kissed him. It was a deep, passionate, hurried kiss between two people who were eager for each other. This time, you didn’t stop Fred’s hands from going up your back and unclasping your bra. He took it off and you quickly felt his left hand on your right breast, squeezing it. His right hand, however, was going up and down your side, sending shivers through your bare skin. He rested it on your waist for a little bit before going down to your ass and squeezing it tightly. You moaned against his lips, your own impatience growing.
You only stopped the kiss to get rid of your panties, the last piece of fabric separating you from him.
Fred watched as you got off of him and started to pull it down your smooth legs. He could feel his cock throbbing at the sight of your completely naked body. You were breathtakingly, heart-racingly beautiful. He loved the lingerie, he really did, but he loved your body a thousand times more. And he would never get tired of looking at it.
When you straddled him again, skin to skin now, he thought he would cum right then and there. You smiled at him, that beautiful smile that never changed, and kissed him one more time. Fred placed his hands on your waist, squeezing it gently, as if to encourage you. Not wasting another second, you guided his tip to your entrance and slowly sank down on him, allowing him to get all the way inside you, quite easily given how wet you were.
“Oh fuck, baby,” he moaned.
Letting out your own whimpers, you placed your hands on his chest and started riding him, still slowly, still teasingly. Fred’s moans soon turned into groans, complaints. He was getting tired of the teasing, he was already on edge. He couldn’t take it anymore. With a swift move, Fred shifted the both of you so now he was on top. He started thrusting into you, quite roughly, earning a loud approving moan from you.
“Fred,” you gasped, digging your nails into his shoulders.
He kept going, pounding harder and harder, moaning as he did so.
You started kissing his neck, biting, sucking, anything that would leave a mark.
“Yes, baby,” you cried out as he thrusted even deeper.
The bed was making a discreet creaking sound that you weren’t sure if the people in the other rooms could hear. You hoped not, but honestly? Right now you didn’t care. The sound of Fred’s heavy breaths, moans, groans and whimpers were all you were paying attention to. Beautiful sounds that had the power to shut down anything else in your mind.
The rhythm he had created was sending you to heaven with every motion. His lips soon found your own again and he kissed you as if he hadn’t done it just minutes before.
“Fuck, Y/N. I’m close.”
“Me too.”
As you felt your body tense, Fred came inside you with a low groan, slowing down just a tad bit. He kept thrusting, however, knowing you were about to reach your climax too. And not long after him, you felt a wave of pleasure wash over you, and your body relaxed completely.
Both of you were panting against each other’s neck, your arms still loosely around his shoulders as he slowly pulled out and collapsed on top of you.
Hugging him more tightly, you felt Fred leave small kisses on your neck, and you closed your eyes, enjoying the extra-tingly sensation. You started to run your fingernails up and down his back, the other hand caressing his hair.
If you concentrated hard enough, you could hear the waves crashing on the beach, the giggling of children playing down there, and the muffled music coming from the muggle restaurant. You felt so at ease.
After a long moment of peaceful, comforting silence, Fred looked up and smiled. “I love you so much.”
You smiled back. “I love you too.”
Not bad for round one.
********
711 notes · View notes
semisgroupie · 3 years
Text
 The Woman Who Used to be Mrs. Jones
Genre: smut, fluff (kinda at the end?), angst
Pairing: Aoi Todo X F!Reader
Word Count: 6.4k words
Warnings (some of the content can be triggering so please read through the warnings before reading this): cheating (in this Todo is the other man/reader is in a loveless marriage where her husband cheats on her/her husband is just a huge asshole), toxic relationship, sexual scenes, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy), oral sex (f! and m! receiving), dirty talk, multiple creampies, bathroom sex, praise, risky sex (they fuck at a party the reader and her husband is hosting), mention of a small altercation between Todo and reader’s husband, mention of a child & brief mention of pregnancy (not detailed),  if I missed anything let me know
A/N: I do not condone, support or encourage cheating! It is not good, don’t do it! The song Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul helped me with creating this piece so I recommend listening to it while reading this. This has depicted sex within this so MINORS DNI (I’m not gonna cry bc I don’t cry but I am not afraid to beat some ass) So I hope you all enjoy it, comments/reblogs are very appreciated!!! I also apologize in advance if formatting is weird on mobile :/
Flashbacks are bolded & italicized! Also separated by a border!
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Todo walks up to the counter of the cafe and orders the usual for the both of you. He came early since he was done with work earlier than usual so after paying for the drinks he carried them to the special spot you two shared. Once seated he takes his phone out to check the time while taking a sip from his drink.
The time read 5:45. You got out fifteen minutes ago and your job wasn’t too far from the cafe, so you’d be there soon. The bell chimed to the cafe and Todo looked up to see you walk in.
His heart pounded in his chest, you looked as beautiful as you did the first day he met you all those years ago in high school. Once you two made eye contact you flashed him a smile and made your way over to him.
“Hey baby, I didn’t think you’d be here before me.”
He felt his cheeks flush at the pet name. You leaned down to hug him and give him a kiss, placing your hands on each side of his face caressing him as your lips met. Once you pulled away you sat down and started talking about your day at work.
He couldn’t help but lose focus as to what you were saying. He knew your day was tough from how your hair looked a bit disheveled from running your hands through it, a habit you had picked up when you were extremely stressed.
Time passed as the two of you spoke about each other’s days and then you were both done with your drinks.
“Wanna go home now Aoi? As much as I love it here I found this new recipe online that I would really like to try out!”
He nodded as you both got up, tipped the cashier one last time before heading to your shared home. The distance was short from where you both were currently and when you two were together even one hundred miles would feel like two blocks.
As Todo put the key in to unlock the door he sighed in content. Once you both were inside he took your jacket off and put it away. He leaned on the kitchen island while you started taking out ingredients for dinner.
“This isn’t a dream right Y/N?”
It just felt so unrealistic to him he just had to be dreaming. Your laughter filled the air as you walked towards him. You wrapped your arms around his body and looked up at him.
“While we did this in the most unconventional way it is very much real” you removed your left hand from his body to put your hand close to his line of view, “this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.”
Unconventional? Was that even the right word to explain the events that led you both to where you are now?
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You started your arrangement with him two years ago. You became “Mrs. Jones” a year before that. A happy marriage was wished to the both of you, but your marriage was anything but that. Six months after you both said your I do’s you found your husband in bed with his boss. They didn’t even think about trying to conceal their affair.
To say it broke your heart was an understatement. You felt like he ripped your heart out of your chest and destroyed it slowly as you watched. Soon there were lonely nights filled with you drinking and crying yourself to sleep. Soon after you just became numb, you got used to putting up a facade whenever your friends or family asked how married life was.
The only one who knew of the affair and how horrible your marriage actually was, was your best friend Valerie. When she first found out you had to hold her back the next time she saw him because she was just filled with rage. You were trying to find a good divorce attorney, but you just didn’t have enough money yet, so you were stuck for the time being. Then it was time to plan how to celebrate one year since the day you married him.
Valerie said that she would bring a special surprise for you, but you just pushed it to the side. You settled on hosting a party at your parent’s house since it was big enough. The fake smile you had plastered on your face burned your soul more than the cheap ring on your finger. A cheap ring that meant the entire world one moment but now means absolutely nothing.
You were leaning on the wall, holding a glass of champagne, next to your husband as Valerie approached you.
“Y/N! You look absolutely stunning!” she gave your husband a side glance as she begrudgingly said his name, “Declan... anyways I have your surprise so come with me to the backyard!”
Before you could say anything she grabbed your hand and weaved both of you through the crowd of people. She opened the door and you almost dropped your glass at the sight.
“Aoi? I thought you were away in Sweden?”
Todo brings a hand to his neck.
“I was but my job relocated here, and Valerie told me everything. As much as I’d love to say congratulations, I can’t.”
Your body moves on its own as you approach him and hug him. He holds you on instinct and all that is heard is sniffles. You move back and quickly apologize for your abrupt actions.
“Hey, don’t apologize pretty girl” he brought his hands to cup your face and wiped the tears from your face, “Declan should be the one apologizing, how could he take someone like you for granted. I know you might not believe me, but you look just as beautiful as you did when we were in high school.”
The two of you were high school sweethearts but got accepted into different colleges. The inevitable happened and you both broke up, heading your separate ways losing contact. The last thing you heard about him was he had a job in Sweden and that was it. After college you met Declan and he seemed like a knight in shining armor, but it was too late for you to realize he was the devil in disguise.
You leaned into his touch as if you two were the only ones there. Only if he was the one you married; you both would be so happy. You wouldn’t have to worry about any mistresses or affairs because even in this moment you felt all his love. Todo moved in and before you knew it you felt his lips on yours.
You melted into the kiss immediately kissing him back until he abruptly pulled away.
“I am so sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to you’re still married, and this is the anniversary party and he’s inside—”
“I don’t care about Declan. The only one I care about is you. Valerie always says I should be a little selfish and now is the time. I still care about you Aoi, I still love you. The piece of my heart that left with you is now back and I’m whole again. I understand if you’re not comfortable with this, I am trying to find a lawyer and once I get the promotion at my job I can finally pay for one.”
You looked up at him hoping he would indulge you in one last kiss even if it would be the last one you two ever shared. You watched as a smile grew on his handsome face.
“I love you too Y/N, I always had and I always will. When Valerie told me about everything I cannot explain the anger I felt not only at him but also myself. If I never left then you wouldn’t be in this situation. Maybe you would’ve been with me.”
He leaned down and placed another kiss on your lips. Before it could continue Valerie ran out to the both of you.
“Hey lovebirds as much as I love seeing you two together Declan is starting a toast and wants his wife by his side.”
She rolled her eyes as your husband’s name left her lips. You took a deep breath and turned inside, Valerie and Todo following you. You took another deep breath as you made your way to your husband putting up the fake smile. He handed you a glass of champagne and started the toast.
“This past year with my beautiful wife by my side has been the best year of my life. Waking up next to her every morning is what fuels my fire. I love this woman so much and marrying her was the best decision of my life. Thank you all for coming and supporting us. Here’s to a happy, healthy marriage and for many more years to come!”
As glasses clinked and cheers filled the room you were filled with disgust at his words. How could he spew such garbage knowing it meant absolutely nothing?
“Come on honey, you can do a better job with that fake fucking smile. Make everyone believe that we’re in love and that I haven’t fucked almost every single one of my coworkers. Maybe I’ll even indulge in you tonight.”
“Fuck you Declan, you piece of shit.”
You excused yourself to the bathroom shoving your heel into his foot making him wince in pain. Todou followed you upstairs a few minutes afterwards hearing your sobs. He knocked on the door once, twice until your shaky voice responded.
“Hey it’s me, I wanted to check on you.”
He waited hearing your heels click on the ground until you reached the door to open it. You looked up at him with tear stained cheeks, eyes puffy from all the rubbing and wiping your tears away. Todo looked at you with so much love it was as if Eros struck him with his bow.
He quickly placed his lips on yours, the kiss feverish but also very loving. As if he was telling you how much he loved you each time his lips met yours. He picked you up and placed you on top of the bathroom sink, quickly running to shut and lock the bathroom door.
“Please let me make you forget about him. Please let me show you what it is like to make love and not fuck. Please Y/N.”
All you did was nod before placing your lips back on his allowing your hands to slide down and undo his belt. He allowed you to undo his belt and pants letting them hit the ground while he was lifting the skirt of your dress up.
“As much as I’d love to take my time worshipping your body we have to make this pretty quick beautiful. But please if you want to stop at any time stop me.”
You nodded at him as you felt his hand lightly graze your clothed pussy. He moved your panties to one side as he slipped a finger in, slowly moving it then inserting a second finger moving it just as slow but each movement made you moan and shiver. You started getting impatient and you grabbed his wrist.
“Please Aoi, please make love to me.”
He slotted his lips against yours again as he removed his cock from his boxers. Moving the tip against your folds making you both moan in the kiss. Once he entered you, slowly and gentle, you broke away from the kiss to throw your head back and moan. Once you gave him the okay he started thrusting.
“Fuck, you’re so tight baby. Just holding me like you don’t want me to let go.”
He moved faster hitting all the right spots. It was as if his cock was designed to fit inside your pussy. Both of your moans and groans filled the small bathroom. It quickly became heated as the mirror started to fog up. He started thrusting into you faster and harder making you throw your hands on the mirror for stabilization.
He placed sloppy kisses along the column of your neck. He lifted himself from your neck to lick two of his fingers and place them on your clit, moving them in small tight circles.
“Come on baby cum for me. Cum all over my cock and I will fill you up. I’ll make this pretty little pussy so fucking messy with my cum and you’ll walk around in that party filled with it. You look so fucking gorgeous baby. I love you so much.”
That sent you off the edge, creaming on his cock with a high pitched moan of his name. He continued pounding your pussy through your orgasm as he was nearing his own. You pulled him in for another kiss running your nails up and down his clothed chest. Feeling your nails against him made him reach his own peak, filling you completely with his cum.
Todo peppered kisses along your lips, swollen and puffy from kissing so intensely, as you both came down from your highs.
“I’m going to pull out now okay?”
“Okay that’s fine.”
You didn’t need to tell Todo to be gentle, he was already treating you like fine glass. He slowly pulled out and quickly moved your underwear to cover your cum filled pussy. A low chuckle left his lips.
“Don’t want you leaking cum all over the place.”
He lifted you off the bathroom sink after picking up both his pants and boxers. Before you could even smooth out your dress Todo did it for you, fixing any flyaways in your hair and placing one last kiss on your lips. He unlocked the door and helped lead you to the stairs.
“We should head down at separate times so we don’t look so suspicious.”
You nodded, placing one last kiss one his lips.
“I love you Aoi.”
“I love you too Y/N.”
You went downstairs and walked to your parents. You had a small limp and it filled both Aoi and yourself with joy seeing how your husband stared, completely confused at you. Valerie leaned next to you close to your ear.
“I already gave Aoi your phone number, go get that dick again.”
She lightly smacked your ass, a small yelp leaving your lips. The party went on for a couple more hours, lingering glances shared between you and Todo. When the party ended you had to figure out a ride situation since your husband drank way too much and you were a little tipsy.
Declan’s brother offered to take him back and before he could offer you a ride Todo came up and offered to take you home, to which you immediately agreed. The ride was filled with laughter and talk of memories. Also, when Todo parked at a secluded area near where you live you thanked him for the ride with a mind blowing blowjob.
He dropped you off in front of your place, being the gentleman he is, he walked you to the front door giving you one last kiss.
“I hope to see you again soon beautiful angel.”
“How about tomorrow? We could go get drinks or dinner.”
“There’s a cafe near my job, I’ll text you the address. Meet me there tomorrow when you’re done with work.”
You nodded as you fished your keys out of your purse. Taking a deep breath you unlocked the door and put your things away, heading straight to the guest bedroom because you refuse to sleep in the same bed Declan had all his whores in.
You thought he went to sleep until you heard a groan of your name. You rolled your eyes and continued going to the guest bedroom, ignoring him until you felt a hand grab your wrist.
“What do you want Declan?”
“What, I can’t touch my wife? You looked really sexy tonight so I thought I might do you the favor of fucking you.”
Fire burned in your veins. Every time you tried to pull yourself away from his hold, his grip got tighter.
“Declan, you’re drunk, and I hate you. Even if I was drunk I still wouldn’t go to bed with you, so make good friends with your hand or call one of your whores up because I will never sleep with you again.”
He turned you around.
“Listen here you bitch, you will never talk to me like that ever again. I did you the fucking favor of marrying your sorry ass now you treat me like this? I haven’t touched you in fucking months and this is what you tell me? Fuck you.”
“My sorry ass? Did me a favor? Did you also do me a favor by cheating on me over and over again? Did you do me a fucking favor then Declan? Rubbing it in my face that you didn’t love me the way I loved you, fucking anything that had tits and bringing them back here. I. Fucking. Hate. You. Rot. In. Hell. I don’t know what those girls see in you anyways, I had to fake almost all my orgasms and your dick has a weird curve, you should go see a doctor for that actually. I can’t wait until I have the money to divorce you and properly leave your sorry ass in the dust.”
You snatched your arm from his grip and locked yourself in the guest bedroom. You took off the heels and unzipped your dress letting it hit the ground as you made your way to the bathroom that was connected to the room. You took off the ring on your left hand flushing it down the toilet.
“That’ll be the last I see of you.”
You turned on the shower letting the water run, steam filling up the bathroom fogging up the mirror. You slipped your panties off the memory of your time with Aoi in the bathroom of your parents’ house filling your mind as you picked up the cum stained panties and put them in the laundry basket.
You entered the shower letting the water run over your body. After your shower you put your pajamas on and sent a goodnight text to Todo setting up the time for meeting at the cafe tomorrow. The next morning you woke up to an empty house, you let out a sigh of relief not wanting to deal with Declan after the stunt he pulled last night.
Your day at work went fairly quickly then it was the end of your workday. Inputting the address Todo gave you into the GPS you realized the drive was going to be pretty short. Once you found parking you walked into the cafe, the little bell on the door chiming with the movement. You looked around and saw Todo sitting at a corner side table, isolated from most of the crowd.
That’s when you started the arrangement. He was fine with being the sideman for now until he could properly have you to himself. Little dates and mind blowing sex filled your lives for the next four months.
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~Four Months Later~
Todo was sitting at the table that basically became the unofficially assigned table for you both as he heard the chime to the door. His head shot up expecting you to come through the doorway. It was just an elderly couple. He checked his phone again, checking for any new messages from you and nothing. Just the last message that read: “I’ll see you soon my love”.
Today was the day you would find out if you got the promotion. With the promotion you would get a huge increase in your salary and a $2,000 advance once it was official. $2,000 was the amount you needed to finally afford the divorce lawyer.
Ten minutes passed and Todo ordered another drink for himself. To say he was nervous for you would be an understatement. He was fidgeting like crazy. He received the drink and sat back down at the table. The door chimed again and he looked up to finally see you.
You waved at him and gave him a small smile. Worry filled him and he was afraid to ask you how everything went.
“There’s no way she didn’t get the promotion. She has the best relationship with her boss and she works so hard.” He thought to himself.
You greeted him with a kiss on his head and sat down. He stood silent watching you.
“So I should tell you about what happened at work right Aoi?”
“You don’t have to honey, it’s fine.”
A smile graced your face, a genuine smile, the only type of smile that you shared with Todo since he filled you with genuine happiness.
“I got the promotion.”
Todo sat there in shock.
“What? What did you just say?”
“I got the promotion. I just came back from meeting the divorce lawyer to fill out necessary paperwork, that’s why I came so late.”
He got up from his seat and lifted you up into his arms.
“I’m so happy. I could yell from the rooftops.”
So he did the next best thing, he yelled about your promotion to the entire cafe. The people inside applauded you and gave you words of encouragement. The elderly man approached the both of you after Todo put you down.
“Congratulations to you young lady. This young man seems to be extremely proud of you. I didn’t mean to interrupt the celebration but it’s just that the both of you remind both my wife and I of us when we were younger. While we met under unconventional circumstances we have spent the past 30 years together. I wish you both a happy, healthy relationship.”
You both thanked the old man and watched him walk back to his wife.
“Do you think we’ll be like them one day Aoi?”
He pulled you close to him.
“I don’t think we will, I have a feeling I know we will. Now let’s go pick up your things and bring you back to my place to properly celebrate.”
He drove you to your house and walked with you inside to pack your clothes. In the midst of packing things you both heard the front door slam shut, meaning one thing: Declan was home.
“Care to explain the car in front Y/N? I know you don’t have enough money to afford a new one.”
You sighed and continued packing with Todo.
“I was asking you a fucking question -- oh who’s this? Why are you packing? Oh I get it now, finally got a new guy to deal with your shit? Good luck buddy--”
Before Declan could get another sentence out Todo walked over and shoved him against the wall.
“Don’t you ever speak to Y/N like that again asshole. For your information, she’s leaving you and coming with me. A guy who actually loves her.”
Declan stood there shocked that someone stood up to him. Once you zipped up your bag Todo left Declan to help you. Todo walked behind you with your bag in his hand. You turned one last time to Declan.
“Oh by the way I’ve been having sex with Aoi for the last four months and the first time was at the anniversary party. The reason I was limping was because of him not because of my heels. And you’ll be getting my divorce papers soon, go fuck yourself Declan.”
You walked with Todo to his car and he drove you back to the cafe so you could bring your car to his place. Once you entered through the front door he was on top of you. Placing sloppy kisses all over your lips and neck.
“You looked so fucking sexy there Y/N.”
He picked you up and brought you to his bedroom while you were peppering kisses along his neck. He put you on the bed and started stripping, you followed suit until you were left in your bra and panties and he was left in his boxers.
He pushed you down on the bed and crawled over you. Placing kisses down your body, removing your bra once he got to your chest and removing your panties once he got to your hips. Not one inch of your body was left untouched by his lips except your pussy. The place you needed him most.
“Aoi please.”
“Please what baby? Tell me what you want.”
“Need you—your mouth on my pussy please.”
He wasted no time. He licked from your leaking entrance to your engorged clit. Making you throw your head back.
“I don’t know how but you taste better every time. I’m fucking addicted to how you taste.”
He dove back in, wrapping his lips around your clit and using a finger to tease your entrance. He was alternating between light sucks and harsh sucks making you buck your hips against his mouth.
“Aoi please fuck me. Wanna cum on your cock please.”
He gave your clit one last suck and took the finger he used to circle your entrance and put it in your mouth. The feeling of your tongue swirling around his finger made him even harder if that was possible. He stood up and took off his boxers, throwing them to a random area in the room.
He spit on his hand and pumped himself a few times as he made his way back on the bed.
“Are you ready my love?”
You spoke breathlessly “yes Aoi, please.”
He aligned himself and entered you slowly, going inch by inch until he bottomed out inside you. A moan leaving both of your lips.
“And correction my love, I don’t fuck you” you furrowed your brows but that expression quickly changed when he pulled himself back until only the head of his cock was inside you and he bottomed out again in a swift movement, “I make love to you.”
He leaned down placing his forearms on either side of your head slotting his lips against yours. His thrusts slowly increase in speed. He breaks the kiss to praise you.
“My beautiful girl is so talented. You look so gorgeous right now. So fucking beautiful, I love you Y/N. I love you so much.”
“Aoi, feels s’good. Please I’m gonna cum soon. You fill me so good, like you were made for me.”
You wrap your legs around his waist and he slides his hand down between the two of you to rub circles around your clit. Your moans start increasing in pitch signaling that you’re going to cum. You bring your hands to his back and rake your nails down, digging into his skin, sure to leave marks. His ruts increased in speed bringing you to your orgasm.
“Fuck baby you’re clenching my cock so tight. I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy baby. I’m gonna fill you up every single day because now you are mine.”
He emphasized each word with a hard thrust. He buries his face in the crook of your neck. Once he cums he sinks his teeth in trying to conceal the guttural moan that leaves his mouth. Coming down from his high he lifts his head up.
“I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to—”
“There’s no need to apologize Aoi, I’m sorry about the scratches on your back.”
“Don’t apologize pretty girl, with how often we’re going to be making love I���ll get used to it.”
He slowly pulled out and you felt the cum leak out of you. He picked you up and carried you bridal style to the shower. Let’s just say both of you were lucky that the neighbors were gone for the night.
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~1 year later~
The both of you have been together for a year and four months. Todo was by your side the entire time throughout the divorce preceding. Comforting you and supporting you the entire time. Once your divorce was finalized your relationship received an official title.
Both of you were extremely happy but there was the voice in the back of Todo’s head that gave him doubts. When he went to go engagement ring shopping with Valerie the voice was there.
As he picked out the perfect ring for you the voice was there. His head was filled with doubts. Of course he loved you, he loved you more than anyone or anything in the world. He knew you loved him. His love for you was immortal, unconditional but he wasn’t so sure if it was the same for you.
That voice in his head hammering doubts over and over again it made him nervous. He started to wonder if he should bring the ring back. If he should change his mind. It was that voice.
“What if she gets tired of you like her husband did with her? What if she finds someone better than you? What if she doesn’t love you as much as you love her? Could you handle the heartbreak Aoi? Could you?”
He started getting distant from you, less kisses in the morning, leaving without saying goodbye, barely initiating sex, it made you worried. What if he’s getting tired of you like Declan? You texted him wanting to meet at the cafe after work. He just sent back a simple “okay”.
Reading it made you even more nervous than before. When you were done with work you drove as slow as you possibly could to the nearby parking lot. You opened the door to the cafe and once you looked around you saw Todo there, fidgeting.
“Is he going to end things with me? We were supposed to move to the new house next week.” You wondered to yourself, you both had so many plans for the future but the future is uncertain.
You sat down and it was silent. He nudged your drink over to you and that was the most interaction you got from him since you got there. It killed you to not talk to him and it was killing him too.
“Y/N, I’m scared.”
You looked into his eyes and saw the fear within them. But what could he possibly be scared about?
“Aoi, what’s wrong? What’s scaring you?”
“What if you get tired of me? What if you meet someone better than me? What if—”
“Aoi. Stop that please” your voice started shaking, it broke your heart to see the man you love being plagued with such fears.
“Aoi, I love you. I love you more than anything in the world. You’re my love. You’re my soulmate. You make me happier than anyone in this world. You brighten up my day, the small things you do make me fall even more in love with you.”
You got up and bent down to hug him. You pulled back holding his face in your hands.
“Aoi I will never get tired of you. I let you leave me once and I never plan on doing it ever again. I love you Aoi Todo, I will love you until my heart stops beating and I will love you long after that. In every life I will look for you to recreate this love over and over again. If I had to go back in time I would go through this all over again just to be right here with you.”
Tears were falling down both of your faces by the time you stopped speaking. You wiped his tears away and he lifted his hands to wipe yours away. He pulled your face closer to his and kissed you.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m so so sorry.”
He muttered apologies against your lips and when you both pulled away it was his turn to speak. You sat back down holding his hands above the table.
“I just got scared Y/N. I love you so much and I just can’t imagine my life without you. I look forward to the future with you, I want you by my side through every single endeavor. You’re my everything. You’re the sun that brightens my day. You’re the stars that shine through my night sky. You’re the air that I breathe. I love you.”
You stood up and pulled him along with you as you both walked out of the cafe. You drove the both of you home and once you entered you led him to the bedroom. Once you entered you undid his work shirt and pants stripping him to his underwear. You led him to the bed and sat him down.
“I never want you to question my love for you ever again.”
You kissed him and placed kisses down his body. Little nibbles along his pecs, a flick of your tongue along his nipples, slow sensual kisses until you reached the waistband of his boxers. You tugged at the waistband and he lifted his hips to help you properly take them off.
His cock slapped against his abdomen. You took it in your hand and gave it a few gentle strokes. You placed featherlight kisses from the head of his cock to the base. You took his head into your mouth swirling your tongue around it and letting it go with a pop.
You took your hand and spit on it using it to lube his cock for you and you started to take more of him into your mouth. His moans and groans filling the room along with the sounds of you gagging yourself on his cock.
When you popped up for air looking at him he could swear he just saw a goddess in front of him. Even with your saliva and tears coating your face he has never seen anyone more beautiful than you. Even Aphrodite herself could not even come close to your beauty.
You got up and stripped off your clothing. You pushed him back gently to lay on the bed as you straddled him aligning his cock with your pussy. You sunk yourself down onto him, he tossed his head back into the bed feeling your warm slick walls welcome him in.
You started moving up and down slowly before gaining a rhythm bouncing on his cock. You moved your upper body close to his grabbing his face and making eye contact.
“I love you—ah fuck—Aoi. I love you so much. You fuck me so good. You are so handsome. Thank you for loving me.”
You felt his arms reach around your waist as planted his feet on the ground to pound into you. Once he started jackhammering into you repeatedly hitting your g-spot you felt yourself cumming around him over and over again.
He used this position to pull as many orgasms as he could from you until he had his own and with how tight you were around him it would be extremely soon. You felt his cock twitch inside you.
“Please cum inside me Aoi, please please please. I need you to fill me up please I need your cum.”
He pulled you down and his hips lifted bottoming out inside you, filling you with his cum. You let your full weight go onto him as you were catching your breath. Hard breaths filled the room. You looked at him and kissed him again.
“I love you Aoi.”
“I love you more Y/N.”
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The following week you both moved into your forever home. Todo made dinner and ordered your favorite dessert to celebrate the move. It was also the day that he was going to propose. He knew how much you hated public proposals and receiving unnecessary attention so why not do it at home?
When you were doing the dishes making small conversation on how you saw a documentary about female serial killers he got the ring and went on one knee.
“So all of her victims were just random men who had green eyes, isn’t that—”
“Y/N.”
You turned around and dropped the sponge in your hand. Your jaw drops at the sight of the man you love and the most beautiful ring you have ever seen.
“Y/N, you have made me the happiest man the past year and four months. Time with you has been amazing. You make me feel like I have been floating on air and I never want to come down. I love you so much. Will you continue this journey of life with me, as my wife?”
“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!”
You bent down to kiss him and he slipped the ring on your left finger. A few seconds later Valerie called, already aware of what Todo was planning to do. You set the date of the wedding six months from the day of the proposal.
The wedding was small and filled with only close friends and family. It was the happiest day of your life and everyone preferred Todo over your ex husband, even your father, who never liked any of your boyfriends.
“I like this guy a lot Y/N, I mean I’ve always liked him.”
“Dad you threatened to hunt him down when we first started dating in high school.”
“Oh honey it’s just dad stuff but that was a promise and it still stands.”
“Dad! He’s not like that, he makes me feel like I’m the only woman in the world and like I’m a precious gem.”
You both looked over at Todo sharing a dance with your mom and when he looked at you, you could see your future in them. Wherever he would go you would be there beside him as his wife.
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“this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.” Todo leaned forward and kissed you holding you in his arms. 
“I never thought that one person could make me feel so loved and make me feel so much love for them Y/N.”
Now married life was doing the both of you well. Nothing could tear the both of you apart. Not even the news on your one year anniversary that you both were going to have your first child. If Todo felt like he was on cloud nine before then holding your beautiful, healthy son in his arms made him feel he was in seventh heaven. 
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A/N pt2: thank you all for reading this, I’m really excited about how this work turned out I hope you all enjoyed it. This is by far my longest fic so I really appreciate you reading it through. I have much more on the way, if you have any requests my ask is open! Again thank you so much for reading I appreciate you all! — D <3
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hey i hope you're doing well!! i was wondering if i could request a oneshot that kinda diverges from canon ? so basically mc is given the chance to go back to the human world (permanently) or stay in devildom w the brothers. so everyone literally expects for them to stay bcs they really "happy" with the brothers + the (un)dateables,, but surprise:: theyre fucking ecstatic to go back to the human world !!!! and they re all like "why mc dont u love us 🥺" and mc just goes full rant about every shitty thing that happened to them in devildom: belphie killing them, brothers treating her as lilith's replacement, dangerous shit 😌😌😌😌 tHIS IS SO LONG N SPECIFIC OMG IM SORRY
Oo. Yes. This is it. I remember always choosing the "Yeah fuck you guys I wanna go home," choices lmao. There's so much I personally would say to them if put in that situation. One would be what the fuck.
This takes place after Belphegor kills you, but before you go home. The undatebles aren't really included because none of them really fit in with the scene I'm painting.
Also! To my followers, I'm thinking of opening a patreon? Idk if anyone would use it or not. It's just that I am trying to make money, and since I can't work consistently, this might be my best shot for now. It's just a thought! I won't do it if you guys think it's stupid. Thanks babes 💞
It was an offer from Diavolo that started all this.
After Belphegor had lashed out you'd taken to staying away from any of the brothers. You'd never totally felt safe around the demons. They are demons after all, but you trusted that someone would always be there to protect you. That was what you were told at least. It worked in many circumstances, but not when you needed it most. Not when you actually died.
You were miserable. Everyone could tell just by the way you acted. A frown was on your face the majority of the time, you were always on guard around any demons, and you spent the majority of your nights at purgatory hall for some reason or another.
It hurt them to see you so terrified of their presence. Any little fight they had now flashed like a warning sign in your mind, alerting you to the danger of meddling in demon affairs. You'd leave, and they'd become discouraged, only realizing how empty everything felt with you gone. They try to make it up to you, try to keep away from their natural tendencies to get a bit rowdy, but nothing works. You're still petrified in their presence.
That's when Diavolo asks you if you want to go home. You're not comfortable here, it's written on your sleeve. It's affecting your mental health, and despite how much it hurts to send someone so perfect away, he does suggest you leave. To get some help, reconnect with yourself, and possibly forget they ever existed.
You agree.
It's heartbreaking when they find out. Belphegor blames himself, and so does everyone else. They see his mistake as the catalyst for all your changes in personality, when really it was just the final nail in the coffin. After being forced to participate in a stressful school schedule, to deal with men constantly busting into the room despite the lock, being expected to cook for the avatar of Gluttony at least once a week, and to have to find new hiding spots for your precious items to avoid loosing them to Mammon, it was a lot. You were always up, ready for some crazy new happening, never resting even when your body was on the verge of collapse. Your body couldn't handle it anymore, and after Belphegor, you knew you'd never sleep again
You don't say goodbye to them.
Lucifer acts like it doesn't bother him, and he'll act this way until the day he ceases to exist. It does though. He considered you a friend, possibly more, but seeing as you willingly left the realm, it's clear that he misjudged the situation. Satan doesn't receive the news any better. He's a lot more angry then Lucifer, but deep down they both know the eldest is just better at hiding his feelings. The house is a wreck without these two micromanaging every aspect, but neither ever pleaded with you to stay.
They blame Belphegor, but they also blame themselves for not showing you how much you meant to them. Satan knows he could have done more. He should have. In all the books in his library, why is there not one explaining how to fix such a situation? Lucifer almost thinks the same, but he knows he does not need books. He should have noticed your little set backs from the beginning, without the help of a book.
Mammon doesn't completely understand what happened. He's confused, not knowing what he did to make you despise him so. Levi tries to explain, sometimes through teary eyes and anxious hand movements, yet it still never really sinks in. Part of him believes he could have possibly shown his affections more. The other remaining side can't stop chastising himself for not knowing.
The third eldest feels abandoned, and he doesn't know why. You're just a normie. Just some human who shouldn't mean anything to him, but you do. He hates it. Leviathan wants nothing more to forget you, but how can he when your ghost still haunts these halls?
The only one who seems to be able to move on is Asmodeus, but that's far from the truth. He's good at faking emotions. Sure, he's never really had to fake being happy, but all the improv disappointment and whiney attitudes have prepared him for this. Asmo looks fine. No one really worries about him. They should.
Beelzebub and Belphegor have been at odds ever since you left. They both blame the youngest, and whilst Belphie doesn't usually care about his sibling's opinions, knowing Beelzebub is so angry with him hurts. He can't fix it either. You're not coming back, and Beelzebub will always be angry with him for doing something so selfish.
And Beelzebub is angry. He moves out of their shared bedroom and into your room. For weeks he refuses to even speak to Belphie, and after that he only acknowledges him in passing. It's heartbreaking to watch, but Beelzebub doesn't care. You're gone.
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chrisevansgoodgirl · 3 years
Text
i've heard allegations 'bout your reputation, i'll show you my shadows if you show yours
summary: requested (like a year ago, sorry!)  Reader and Andy getting in a legitimate fight or maybe flirting in front of him with one of his colleagues to get under his skin because he hasn’t touched her in weeks from being so busy jealous Andy would be so dominant I’m weak i took some liberties and set it at the christmas eve party at andy’s office.
warnings: andrew barber being r o u g h  😩 😩 😩 and jealous 😩  and mean bc i just so deeply want this man to yell at me and pull my hair bc he’s an angry daddy, however, he is not called daddy in this story bc i don’t do it unless you guys ask me to. so smut, and he’s in charge and i’m dead about it. more videos being made bc apparently that’s on my mind.
word count: around 7,500
pairing: andy barber x reader
a/n: i hate that it took me so long to post this but here i am, almost a month late with a christmas eve party story. i have very little shame tbh.
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You were not unreasonable, no matter what Andy claimed. You could always admit what was your fault—which was about 80% of all disagreements—but Andy had his faults, too. Tonight? Well, you weren’t innocent…but you were not the only one to blame.
This was the third Christmas party he had taken you to. The first year had not completely been his doing. Lynn had been bothering him about it and he would have gotten away with pretending it just wasn’t possible had Lynn not run into you at the coffee shop near Andy’s house.
You had been accustomed to Andy by then. He didn’t put distance between you two because he wanted to, he just simply wasn’t the best at getting close. You practically forced him into sometimes, and it had never gone wrong, so he trusted you. A lot.
You weren’t sure you were going to be able to say that much longer. You had your moments, those situations where you pushed him just a little too far. Not so far that he was angry about it, but far enough that you ended up with a sore ass and maybe a few finger-shaped bruises on your skin.
As if that was an incentive to stop?
Lately, things had been…off. Andy was working on a big case, one that he had just finished the day before. You expected that he was going to come home and make up for not having touched you in 17 days. Yet, that didn’t happen.
You weren’t trying to complain too much. The “honeymoon phase” was something that could not be applied to your relationship because you were as happy as any other day, you loved him more and more as time went on, and you guys always had sex. Always.
But there were the cases that sometimes threw a slight pause in that. That was fine, you understood and it wasn’t like you were with Andy for sex. You loved that man so fucking much, you could deal with some neglect for a little bit. Emphasis on a little bit.
17 days with no immediate plans to remedy it was crossing a line. So, on the 18th night, the night of his office Christmas party, after he merely kissed your head, told you that you looked beautiful, and didn’t fuck you in your tiny, sparkly dress, you also wanted to cross a line. A specific line because it was hard to get a reaction out of him any other way.
Andrew Barber was a jealous man. It was something you never played with because he was jealous. He wasn’t some immature idiot who was going to cause a scene, but he would interrogate you about people he felt were “suspicious”.
On your way to the party, he had wanted to catch up. He felt like this was the first time he was able to breathe since he was put on the case, and he had noticed some distance between you two. You told him about the very basic parts of your day—work, friends, family.
When he placed his hand on your thigh, you had to wonder if this was a game. Why hadn’t he fucked you? Was he trying to make you beg? That was something Andy thoroughly enjoyed, and you trusted him so much that you rarely ever knew when he was doing it. If you stopped to think about it, you would probably find a few times he’d managed to get away with it.
He let you hold his hand and to avoid having to pull away from you, he told you when to move the gear shift. It was cute, too cute for how long you two had been together, but Andy seemed willing to indulge you. He always did when he could.
But as soon as he got to the party, there was more work talk and he had basically pawned you off on Lynn. She was thrilled, of course, she rarely had time for friendships, but she valued Andy, and because of that, she loved you almost as much as he did.
It had been two hours by the time you were completely fed up. Lynn had decided she was about to head out, so she was making her rounds, and that meant that you were stuck with the other partners. Men, women, they were all talking about how great their lawyers had been lately.
Yet, reminder, you hadn’t been fucked in nearly 18 days. You weren’t going to sit around and listen to that for the whole night, you innocently decided to wander a bit. Andy was talking about his case and seemed almost oblivious to your presence. Why did he even bring you? He was the one that reminded you about it, you probably wouldn’t have realized it had gone by until well into next year since work was so hectic.
Regardless, without an answer, you were left to entertain yourself. What else were you supposed to do? Just sit around all night and not speak to anyone? Andy was a complicated man and he had only a handful of people at the job that he liked, but fewer people that he disliked. Most people, he felt indifferent about, and those were the pawns for your current game.
You flit all around the party, laughing, talking to everyone, and though you saw him seeking out your whereabouts every now and then, there was no reaction at all. He didn’t care that some of these sleazy men were staring at your cleavage or your legs—two things he should have done earlier but did not.
By the time you’d nearly spoken to everyone, you felt…possessed, there was no better way to describe it. You were mad and confused and tired, and till the day you died, you would swear on everything you held sacred, the following was not part of your plan. You simply had no other choice than to go along with it when it practically fell in your lap.
Andy hadn’t noticed your best attempts but as soon as Neal was standing in front of you, he was watching. You had not and would not have gone to Neal, it was the other way around. He was possibly picking up on all your sadness and desperation, he was probably able to spot attention-seeking from a mile away since he pulled those kinds of stunts regularly.
Andy was finally paying attention to you and that was why you didn’t walk away. Your boyfriend could deny it all he wanted, but you saw something in his eyes. There was that anger, of course, but there was also that dark gleam. The one that he had when he liked to lay you out under him and remind you who you belong to.
That was all you wanted, that was the only reasoning behind your actions. You didn’t think you’d done anything wrong, not until you laughed at something Neal said and he laughed back, and then he touched your shoulder.
And that was when you knew things had gone too far. You crossed a line, and you should have known better than even trying to use Neal. Because he envied Andy to no end, understandably. Why wouldn’t he try to flirt with you? No one got Andy as angry as Neal, and you should have just put your ego aside and spoken to your boyfriend.
But that window had closed and your time for being a mature, communicating adult was over. You quickly broke away from Neal after that and Andy took only seconds before he was dragging your ass out of that party and to the car.
You weren’t sure what to do. Pretend you didn’t know what the big deal was? Maybe just start blurting out apologies. He opened the car door for you, ushered you in, and then got into the driver’s seat in complete silence.
Andy had been mad at you before, but he had never been so angry he wouldn’t look at you or speak to you. He was gripping the steering wheel so tight that his knuckles were white. His jaw set, brow furrowed, shoulders tense—he stayed that way the entire drive.
Andy wasn’t like this, he usually always had his temper in control. You were worried because you were one of the few people Andy sincerely trusted. It would devastate you if this gave him pause.
When he stopped the car, it became uncomfortably silent. It had taken you almost a minute to decide where you wanted to take this. “Andy, I’m—”
“Don’t apologize.”
“But I am s—”
“Get upstairs, take your dress off, and wait for me on the bed.”
Shit. You fumbled with the handle for a moment, scurrying inside and up the stairs. This was everything that you had wanted, wasn’t it? Then why the fuck were you nervous? Why were you shaking? Why did the idea of a black hole appearing and swallowing you sound so appealing?
You took off your dress and hung it back in your closet. You’d only been in it for a few hours, that didn’t warrant an actual wash. Shakily, you made your way back to the bed and sat there. What about your bra and panties? He hadn’t said. Your shoes? Fuck, what were you supposed to do?
Andy walked in and flipped on the light.
Idiot, why hadn’t you done that?
He made his way to the dresser off to the side of the bedroom, he removed his jacket first, then his cuff links and his tie. He started rolling up his sleeves and you had to look away.
You turned down to your lap. “You didn’t tell me if you wanted me to keep anything else on.”
“I also didn’t tell you that you could speak,” he asserted.
Your stomach dropped, the mere thought of not following his directions was unsettling. When Andy got like this, you wanted to do what he told you to. You wanted him to think you were his good girl. Any time you failed at absolute perfection, you didn’t take it well.
You didn’t know if you should apologize or remain silent. You were wringing your hands, something you became aware of only when he made his way in front of you and placed his hands over yours. You startled slightly, looking up at him.
He grabbed your chin with his thumb and forefinger, keeping your head tilted back. “Are you nervous?”
“I don’t know,” you muttered. You didn’t want him to feel bad because you were feeling some type of way. You also didn’t want to think this had anything to do with him. He’d never given you reason to be nervous.
“Are you scared?”
“Kind of.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want to disappoint you.”
He leaned down, face directly in front of yours. “Before we start, I need you to understand that you’ve never disappointed me. Okay?”
You nodded. “Okay.” That didn’t really help as much as he probably thought it would. Even if you hadn’t disappointed him, there was always the chance that you would. And you weren’t sure he was being completely honest anyway. Neal? What the fuck was wrong with you?
“You don’t need to be nervous or scared, just be completely honest with me.”
“Of course.” You would never lie to him.
“Who do you belong to?”
Your answer was immediate, you didn’t even need to think about it. Recalling life before you met Andy was a bit blurry. Who had you been? Where? What had you wanted? “You.”
“So,” he ran his thumb over your bottom lip, “this mouth…”
“Is yours,” you confirmed.
He hummed, fingers trailing from your face all the way down, between your breasts, over your stomach, stopping at the band of your panties. He paused, noting the shakiness in your breath, the goosebumps on your skin, your hands that were gripping the sheets.
Abruptly, his hand dropped to where you had been expecting it to. Your breath hitched and your hips jumped off the bed, desperate for his touch.
He made a small noise of disapproval and you hurriedly settled back down on the bed. “This pussy? Is that mine, too?”
You nodded. “Yes.”
He pulled your panties off to the side and his fingers ran up your wet skin at an agonizing pace. He brought them up to his lips and his tongue slipped out to taste you. He smiled because you had managed to stay almost completely still, apart from a bit of squirming. “You’re such a good girl, baby. You know that’s one of my favorite things about you, how good you are for me.”
That gave you these awful butterflies and you felt hot everywhere. That was all you ever needed to hear. His hand returned to your center and his first finger slid into you. You looked down to see but he grabbed your jaw again and turned you back up.
“Keep watching me, baby.”
He liked to test you, you knew that. He would give you an order and try to make you disobey him. This time, when his hand fell away from your face, you forced yourself to keep your head tilted. You ignored that burning part of you that wanted to see his fingers pushing in and pulling out, covered in what was dripping from your pussy.
You focused on just feeling. One thick finger was slowly working you open for him, he always stretched you out as much as he could meaning you had to be prepared for some teasing. He prioritized this because he was big and he knew it—and you had been smitten enough before he fucked you, but after, there wasn’t a second of the day your body didn’t crave Andy’s.
Despite how rough Andy could be with you, and how generally tough he was, he liked to baby you. Sometimes, he liked treating you as delicately as one would a bouquet of flowers. He could see a lot of comparisons if he really thought about it. You were beautiful, soft, and smelled so sweet. And if he didn’t pay attention to you, well, he’d been reminded of those consequences at the party.
You kept your eyes on his the entire time. You didn’t falter when he added his second finger, nor when he curled his fingers against that spot inside you, nor when his thumb pressed down firmly on your clit.
He pressed one hand down on your shoulder, a cue to lie back. After you had obliged, he pulled his fingers out of you and told you to open your mouth. You instantly did so, closing around his fingers as soon as they were in your reach.
He pressed his fingers down and kept going until your body jerked and the noise of you gagging echoed in the room. “I wanna see those beautiful lips wrapped around my cock, baby girl.”
You eagerly sat up, still sucking on his fingers as you pulled his belt apart, yanked the button of his pants open, and tore down the zipper. Glancing up at him to look for any signs that you didn’t have his permission to proceed, you pushed his pants and boxers down cautiously until his cock was out.
He pulled his fingers from your mouth and nodded. “Go ahead, baby.”
You moved back on the bed and situated yourself onto your stomach, propping up on your elbows. One hand wrapped around his hard length and you let the tip of your tongue come out to catch the precum dripping from his tip.
He released a shaky breath, hands at his sides because he wanted you running the show. For a while, a least. He didn’t want to guide you, he wanted to see how exactly you were going to make up for your slight misstep at the party.
You ran your tongue up his shaft lightly, feigning that whole soft act that you knew he loved. It wasn’t so much an act, but you had been bent over his desk, hair pulled, ass spanked, both holes thoroughly used. But you liked soft, too. You liked slow and gentle mornings, whispered words, careful touching. You liked whatever he wanted to give you.
You closed your lips around just the head of his cock and sucked. Unlike all other men you had been with, Andy was as patient as a saint. He loved when you teased him. Once, he had you edge him with your mouth for nearly an hour and thinking about how he fucked you after still made your toes curl.
His eyes closed and he sighed. “Fuck, baby.” His hand lightly settled on the back of your head. “So good, I could fuck your mouth for the rest of my life.” He didn’t push you down, he just ran his hand through your hair over and over because he knew how much you liked him to play with your hair.
But then his hold tightened and he pulled you off, much to your dismay. He noted your pout and pleading eyes but was kind enough not to taunt you about them. “Get on your back, sweetheart.”
You knew what he wanted as soon as he stepped away. You quickly climbed up toward the edge of the bed and rolled over, bending your neck over the mattress. You automatically opened your mouth for him, but he placed his hands on your shoulders first.
“Relax.” He leaned over and ran his hands along your arms, setting them on the mattress. He pressed your thighs down, waiting until you had lost all the tension in your body. He curled his hand around his length and stroked several times with a loose hand and a slow pace.
You watched in utter fascination. It never failed to get you wet when Andy showed so much control, over himself, over you. He was in charge of every little thing and you could tell that he got off on that. Every time he reached the head of his cock, he would press down so slightly, so close to your lips but just not enough.
“Andy,” you whispered. “Please.”
He smirked again. “Open your mouth for me.” And as soon as you did, he was slowly sliding in. He was slow at first, keeping his hips still as he slipped the straps of your bralette past your shoulders. He rolled the remaining material down until your breasts were exposed and squeezed them in his hands.
You pressed your thighs together, arching up into his hands more. You tried to relax your throat for him, knowing he was only stopping to give you a moment to prepare.
He pinched your nipples painfully and didn’t stop until you whined. He loved feeling you make that sound when his cock was down your throat, and the deep breaths as the pain faded away. Again, he tortured your nipples between his thumb and forefinger, yanked a little, until you were squirming all around the bed, making these noises around him that he rarely ever heard, your eyes filled with tears.
He leaned over quickly, releasing your breasts so he could give them both a brief kiss. You closed your eyes, humming in satisfaction. He took his time sinking his teeth into your sore, erect nipples and you squealed both times, back arching again. His tongue rolled over your stinging skin and you tilted your head eagerly, attempting to take more of him.
Sometimes, it was enough to get him naturally high, how much power he had over you, your body. He could hurt you and you would thank him; he could turn around and give you just a second of gentleness and you looked at him like you’d never loved anyone as much as you loved him. You claimed that, quite often. Andy wasn’t sure if he believed that, not because he didn’t trust you but because he wasn’t wired to think of himself as special in any way. Why you treated him like he was, was confusing to him at times.
But you were special, so fucking special. You were smart and funny, and so kind to every single person you encountered. It was a nice change from the environment he regularly found himself in. That was what you were supposed to be—a breath of fresh air from his hard life. You were not supposed to become his only source of oxygen, yet there he was. It didn’t seem he was reliant on you because Andy wasn’t comfortable expressing reliance on anyone, but he knew he was.
He stood and watched your body move with those deep, sharp breaths you were taking. Abruptly, his hand whipped across one breast, then the other. You cried out, a nice vibration around him, and now you were quivering. It was so easy for him to play your body like this because you were just needy enough that anything would have given you pleasure. Another thing he knew, another thing that made him so damn cocky.
“Open your legs,” he told you and you parted your thighs. Again, he pulled aside your lace panties and pushed two of his fingers inside you. Your cunt was dripping, your arousal gushing out as his fingers thrust in, curled, searched for that spot that made your eyes roll back. The noise of it made his cock twitch.
Your pussy was throbbing, yearning for the release that only this man could give you. You didn’t care how he did it, you just needed Andy. Hands, mouth, cock, you would take anything he wanted you to have.
“Listen to that greedy pussy,” he directed, voice low and quiet. “So desperate to be filled and fucked. But by who, baby?”
Your stomach twisted at not being able to answer him. That was why he asked when you had your mouth full of him, because if you could speak, you would blurt out reassurances that it was only him.
“Me?” he pressed.
You spoke, despite knowing it was going to sound like nonsense.
“And no one else?”
You were quick with your denial. And maybe, by now, since his cock was always in your mouth, he was a professional at understanding what you were saying. Or possibly, it was just the look in your eyes.
“You sure, baby?”
Once more, your voice came out muffled but hurried, almost panicked. He had to know that you didn’t even think about anyone else. He had to know that you thought he was the most beautiful man in the world.
He dragged his free hand up your body and it settled over your neck. Finally, he pulled out from your mouth only to thrust back in harshly. You choked, your throat contracting around him while he massaged his thumb and finger over your pulse points. He let you breathe through it before he started rocking his hips ever so slightly. You could feel him moving along your tongue and your cheeks, but they were small motions.
You always loved this position; it was easier to take all of him. It was easier to breathe on your back with your chest open, and, unlike being on your knees, it left you open for him.
He leaned forward slightly, pressing one hand off to the side of the bed while the other reached between your legs. His fingers danced along your skin without any real intent, but occasionally, he would touch your clit.
You were reaching for any part of him you could touch. Your hands mindlessly grasped at his back and kept slipping off because of his shirt. You couldn’t ask but you wanted it off. He felt your hands working open his buttons and decided to let you have something. He was going to take and take tonight, he could give you a little.
He stood up and loosened his tie enough to pull it off, then shrugged his shirt off. Once again, his palm settled to your neck. “You should see yourself right now. Shaking, wet, such a good girl.”
You reached up, gripping one hand in his pants, the other around the buckle of his belt and you pulled him in more until your throat was struggling.
“Easy, baby.” He took your hands off him, keeping a hold of one and placing the next back down on the bed. He pulled out carefully, dragging his hand up, and inch by inch, pushed back in. “You should see how deep I’m getting. I can see it right here.” The palm of his hand hovered over your skin, just enough that you could feel him, and he followed his cock again, letting you know how much of him you were taking.
It was a lot of him, not enough. And he was deep, but you needed more. You whined, a plea for him to move this along. He couldn’t want to drag this out, not after almost 18 days.
Again, he leaned over until he could touch you. His hips moved steadily, a controlled move that matched how strategically he was working your cunt, everywhere but the most sensitive part of you.
You hated that you couldn’t beg, but it wasn’t as if he didn’t know. It wasn’t as if you weren’t shaking or if your cunt wasn’t clenching desperately, you knew if he couldn’t feel it, he could at least see it. This went on for several moments, he was proud of how well you were taking him, and wanted to give you some type of award.
You were more than just caught off guard when you felt his lips against one of your thighs. Fuck. He couldn’t, you wouldn’t last long. But he went on, scattering kisses over your thighs, fucking your mouth just a fraction harder as he grew closer to your pussy.
As he licked down from your clit to your entrance, your eyes rolled back. Your hips jumped off the bed and one of his hands held you down in response. You were trembling, whining utter nonsense.
Several times, his tongue ran through you and you’d been so worked up, so wet and frustrated since he’d pulled you out of the party, since he hadn’t fucked you in a while, and this was just happening too fast. You wanted to focus on him, you wanted to apologize in the best way you knew how.
You tried to push him back with your hands on his thighs, but you were nowhere near strong enough.
He turned his head to kiss your thigh again. His hips stilled, most of his cock out of your mouth just in case. “Do you need a moment, baby?”
You debated. If you actually made him stop, made him pull out even if just for a second solely so you could ask him not to make you come...he would be outraged. He might even turn you over and spank you. But he also might not let you come at all. You would die, you knew you would.
You let your hands fall away.
“You okay?”
You hummed slowly, comfortably.
Still, one hand settled on your hip bone to keep you from moving, the other you felt on the back of your thigh close to your ass. He kissed your pussy slowly, sucking at your skin just a little, but not your clit, not yet.
He was careful as he began fucking your mouth again, worried he had pushed you too far. He waited until he was sure you were okay before he sucked your clit between his lips and slipped two fingers into you.
You whined around him as your body shuddered.
He kissed you again, several times to get you to calm down. “It’s okay, baby girl. Be a good girl for me.”
So, you understood, he realized that you wanted to object to this, but Andy was the greediest man you had ever had in bed. You weren’t surprised that he just didn’t care. You found it hard to mind as he began fucking his fingers in and out of you, sloppy, wet noises echoing around the room.
He was sucking again and you were desperately clutching at any part of him you could, his sides, his legs. You weren’t pushing him away now, you were pulling him in.
You were so close, your body arching up as much as it could. You felt tension building in every part of your body. Your own hands came up to your breasts mostly because you knew he would feel your hands moving underneath him.
“Fuck,” he cursed. He left your cunt neglected of his mouth for several moments, only using his fingers, as his cock drove down your throat hard.
You were choking loudly, your body again moving wildly as you gagged. It couldn’t have been more than a few times but they were determined thrusts, you were sure he was going to come in your mouth.
Instead, he pulled out completely and you whined shortly. You didn’t want him to go, but you couldn’t say that. All you could do was try to catch your breath. He didn’t even give you a moment to protest before his face was buried in your cunt.
In seconds, you were a mewling, moaning mess for him. Your body was so tight, so full of unbearable tension. You were shaking, sweating, your pussy was loud and soaking wet and you knew you were dripping everywhere, on him, on the bed.
He didn’t tease, he wanted to let you come because he wanted you coming all night. His favorite form of punishment was too much of a good thing, not withholding how much he enjoyed touching you.
You finished with a scream loud enough that the neighbors probably heard. Again.
Andy touched you through it until you stopped moving, save for the shaking aftershocks when he got a tad too close to your clit. When you were loose and sated on the bed, he started to sit you up.
You quickly turned to him, grasping his face. “I love you, only you.”
“I know, sweetheart.”
“I would never look at anyone else.”
“I believe you.” Even if he didn’t, this was not the place to voice that. This...state he got you in when he was this dominant, this demanding, was not completely unlike you. It was just a very obedient, sensitive version of you that he knew he had to be careful with. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt your feelings.
He touched your face and that was when you realized you were crying, he was wiping away your tears. It was either from your finish or from choking on him, you weren’t completely sure. “You’re okay?”
You nodded quickly. “I’m okay.”
He kissed your forehead and you felt hot. As if what you two were just doing wasn’t filthy, this was what made your heart beat faster and gave you those butterflies in your stomach.
He pulled back and kept hold of your face. “What does my baby girl want?”
“I want to feel you inside me.”
As his lips met yours, he began removing all the remaining clothing on either of your bodies. He moved you up the bed until he could lay your head on a pillow and then positioned himself over you.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too,” he promised. “Keep saying it.”
As he carefully pushed into you, you continued to tell him you love him. You stared at him the whole time, willing your body to relax for him. He didn’t like it when you got so worked up, especially over the games he played in the bedroom. The thing with Neal was bad but it was over and you knew he wasn’t mad at you. He wouldn’t fuck you like this if he was.
You clutched onto his shoulders, trying to hold him as close to you as you possibly could. He was the one that grabbed your legs and cued you to wrap them around his body. His cock sliding into your pussy was a feeling you couldn’t understand why he’d left you deprived of.
Once his hips were settled against your thighs and he was completely buried inside you, you reached up to his face. You loved his cheekbones, you could trace them with your touch for days if he let you. And his beard, you loved feeling his beard under your fingertips.
He let you do this, explore him as if you could possibly forget anything after all the other times you did it. You remembered the first time he fucked you, you couldn’t stop staring, you couldn’t stop touching—he was so painfully beautiful. He was so patient with you, always had been, and now, despite how badly you felt his need to move, to fuck you, he was going to wait for you to be ready.
“You did this on purpose,” you muttered.
“Did what?”
“You didn’t fuck me. For 17 days. You…wanted me to make a scene—”
“That’s a pretty serious accusation.”
“I could take it to court and win,” you countered.
He smirked. “Could you? What’s my motive?”
“You like being possessive. You like dragging me out of places, you like bringing me home, you like reminding me who I belong to.”
“And were you reminded?”
“No one really belongs to anyone or anything at the end of the day—”
“No,” he interjected, tone sharp. You always liked that tone. “You belong to me.”
“Maybe…”
“You are mine,” he repeated. “And you’re going to say it or we’re going to have a long night.”
“I will say it if you admit this was your plan all along.”
“You think I wanted you to flirt with Neal?”
Your stomach flipped. “I wasn’t—”
He nodded, placing a hand on your shoulder. “I know, I didn’t mean to word it like that. I know you weren’t—”
You felt slightly like you were about to panic. Flirting with Neal? No. “Never, I would never—”
He shushed you. “I know, baby. I know you wouldn’t because you are a good girl. I promise I know that.”
You settled somewhat but that lingering feeling in the pit of your stomach was hard to ignore. Flirting with Neal? You couldn’t bear him thinking you would ever do that to him. Flirting in general with people Andy felt indifferent to was off the table unless you wanted to placate his desires. Certainly, he had to know that.
“I wanted to hear you beg,” he insisted. “That was what I wanted. I wanted honest begging because you are so fucking beautiful begging for my cock.”
You huffed. “Well, you should have asked.”
“I didn’t want to have to ask.”
“You could have given me a hint. I was going around your party trying to get your attention—”
“You had it, you always do. Now, tell me who you belong to.”
“I think we all belong to the stars.”
“No,” he sighed.
“Or the moon, people who experience menstruation especially. The moon controls us, it’s been studied by scientists. There are articles.”
“Scientific articles do not support that,” he asserted and you couldn’t help but laugh. Andy was exact. He didn’t believe in anything he couldn’t see or that couldn’t be proven. Even now, inside you, he couldn’t turn that part of his brain off.
“Baby,” he sighed as his hand came up to curl around your neck. It just rested there, a heavy reminder of all the times in the past he had held you like that, or those other times when he applied just the right amount of pressure. “I want to fuck you, I want to make you cry, I want you to be shaking after I’m done with you, I want to fill you up with my cum. Don’t you want that?”
You nodded, once again turned on beyond comprehension.
“Then be good and say what I want you to say. Don’t make me make you say it.”
“What if I want you to make me?”
“You don’t.”
Andy’s punishments were always so elaborate and such a blur. He knew how to reduce you to nothing but need, and you needed him so badly sometimes. He loved seeing you like that, but he didn’t always like taking you there. He knew how careful he needed to be during and after, so he reserved it for major misbehavior.
You brought one hand up and set it on his forearm. You could feel his skin and his muscles. “I belong to you.”
Just barely, as he stared at your face, his hold tightened. Your breath stuttered but you made sure not to get too worked up too soon. You didn’t want him to have to stop before he finished inside you.
“That can never happen again, baby.”
“I know. It never will. I’m so—”
He tightened his hand again. “Don’t say sorry.”
You didn’t understand why he wouldn’t let you say the one word you so badly needed to say.
“I don’t blame you, sweetheart, I’m just saying…it can’t happen again.”
You caught the lead of his tone. “But what if it does?”
“I might have to make sure he knows that you’re mine.”
You wanted him to let the whole world know. You knew he saw your eyes light up because he smirked. “How would you do that?”
“I might have to let him see how I fuck you. I might have to show him how I can make you beg for me, or how willingly you bend over when I’m going to spank you. I might have to show him how wet you get after I mark up your ass, maybe how whiny you get when my hand is around your throat. But maybe I’ll just have to send him the video I’ve been recording tonight, how well you can suck my cock, how badly you want to.”
You were stunned for a moment—recording? Where was the camera? The idea of Andy recording you was such a turn on. You loved making videos for him, but you’d always wanted to see one where he was with you. “You’ve been recording?”
“Would you be okay with that if I was?”
“Yes. I want to watch you fuck me.”
“You’re such a good girl.” He pulled his hips back once and then snapped up noisily, pulling a moan from your throat. “You know how much I love that sound? When you can hardly breathe but you still make all those noises you know I want to hear.”
He leaned in to kiss you, hips stilled, hand still wrapped around your neck. It was brief, a reward, a reminder. You were being good and he loved you, but he was going to fuck you.
You broke away, nodding to let him know you were ready, that you wanted this. “Please.”
He rolled over so you were on top of him. He kept his hold on your neck to keep you sitting up and used his opposite hand to grab your ass. After he kneaded your skin hard enough he knew it would bruise, he spanked you loudly, harshly. Your body jerk forward, taking him in deeper than you knew was possible.
You whined, trying to pull back a little. He gripped your ass again and held you there. It was painful but exciting, you wanted him to push your limits tonight. He so rarely did, concerned with pleasing you second and treating you delicate first.
He let you go only to spank your other ass cheek. Again, you moved forward and you felt fuller than you ever had. You ached between your legs, almost uncomfortably but the idea of having him this deep in your body was making you wetter by the second. You were dripping, you could see how wet his skin was, how much of a mess he was making of your pussy.
“Ride me, sweetheart.”
You found a comfortable position, your hands on either side of his waist in the mattress. He settled his arm between your breasts so he could still see them moving as you began jerking your hips back and forth. They were sharp, abrupt movements because you wanted to come so bad, you could hardly think of anything else. Save for your disbelief over the fact that he was making you do this yourself. But you didn’t argue because the last thing you wanted was punishment for talking back.
He closed his hand more, every sound you made was short and strangled. You moved faster, knowing he was closer when he choked you harder. His free hand took one of your breasts. He was so delicate at first, a gentle, slow touch before he was pinching your nipple so hard you were whining. He smacked your breast and you shuddered, nearly falling forward onto him, but he kept you up. Mostly because he wanted to do it again to your other breast.
Every slap against your breasts—loud and stinging, always surprising because he didn’t want you to have the comfort of a pattern—was pushing you closer to your orgasm. You were mindlessly bouncing on his cock, uncaring of the pain you felt every time you came down just a little too hard for how big he was. You felt like an animal, like you were simply a victim to your body’s depraved, primal desires.
You finished first, screaming things you would be impressed if he actually understood. You could cry, the tension built over days was finally all gone.
He rolled over once more, taking his spot on top again.
You clung to him, legs and arms, pulling him in like you would die if he wasn’t close enough. You needed to feel his whole body against yours.
“Hear that, baby?”
Oh, you heard. You’d been trying to ignore it, but of course, not if Andy had any say in it.
“Hear how wet your pussy is?”
So wet. Every time he pulled out and pushed in, the noise would fill the room. You only nodded.
Since you were wrapped around him so tightly, it wasn’t difficult for him to grab your hip and move you up the bed with him. He set you against the headboard, the pillows under the small of your back, propping you up for him.
He was on his knees now for more leverage. You knew he was going to fuck you hard. “Look at this, baby.” He slowly pulled out and you turned down to watch. “See how messy you’re getting my cock?”
“Yes,” you whined.
He grabbed his cock, used it to drag up and down your cunt several times.
“Andy, please.”
He shushed you, a slow, calm action that contrasted when he smacked the head of his cock against your clit.
You gasped and your hips jerked forward.
“Stay still,” he warned.
He did it over and over, and enjoyed watching you fail at trying to stay seated on the bed. He thrust in completely, quick and hard, only to pull out and smack your clit again. This was his routine for what felt like an agonizing hour, but you knew it was nowhere near that long. You knew even he didn’t have that kind of patience.
You cried out when he finally buried himself inside you again. As he pushed forward, he pulled you down. His fingers found your clit and you were soon tumbling over that edge once more.
As he finished, he pulled you on top of him, lying back on the bed. One arm wrapped tight around your back to pin you against his chest, his opposite hand tangled in your hair tightly. He hid his face in the bend of your neck, grunting as his hips continued to rock just slightly.
He kept you there for several long moments until he had completely satisfied himself. You were intoxicated being this close to him. You angled your head as much as you could and kissed the side of his face.
He turned over, setting you on the bed as he pulled out. You watched him curiously, moving to sit up with him. He made a disapproving noise and you laid back again. Once again, he made his way to the dresser and grabbed his phone.
“You were seriously recording?”
He arched an eyebrow. “Do I usually bluff?”
Nope, never.
“Now I have a reference if you ever forget how a good girl is supposed to act.”
You suppressed an eye roll.
“Open your legs.” He came closer, directing the camera at your pussy. He touched you, spreading his cum all over your skin, rubbing circles around your clit, just barely dipping his fingers into you.
You watched his face the whole time. You loved how much Andy loved you and when he stared at you after fucking you, it was hard to miss. He was obsessed with you and he never minded showing it.
For almost a month, you watched that video every day. You were fascinated by him, the way he moved, the way he touched you. After that, you started wanting to record more and Andy never minded.
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lepusrufus · 3 years
Note
8) For everyone, including the vampire wifes please
8. What’s it like inside your oc’s mind? (Literally, or metaphorically.)
I know this is probably meant as a "what their thoughts are etc" but since I keep thinking of a fanfic I read like two years ago where they go inside one of the characters head and are in the literal physical manifestation of her thoughts imma go with that bc I think it's a really cool concept:
Alcina: at first glance her "mindspace" looks just like the castle but give your surroundings a closer look and there are just things that are off. Everything seems slightly more grant, all in the absolute best condition, until you get to the lower levels and cells full of her failed experiments greet you. Some will even stare at you with oddly familiar golden eyes, but she'd never let herself dwell on it. Her staff is there too, all doing their assigned jobs perfectly. Outside, the village and town look even better than in real life, the stronghold not ruins but looking just as good as her castle. There's a comforting buzzing following everywhere but sometimes it sounds as if it wants to leave, go somewhere unsafe.
Esteria: dense woods as far as your eyes can see. It's daylight but the sun can't quite reach down below the leaves but that doesn't stop grass and moss from growing everywhere. Some trees have burrows where small critters live, except their eyes look a tad too human and they speak in the voices of the people she knows. The voices of those far in her past are staticky and quiet while those still part of her life are clear and can hold lengthy conversations. Many trees have papers tied into their branches with memories on them, and fears and bad memories are represented by little white ghosts hiding around trees just out of eyesight.
Bela: even normally she takes after her mother so it's no surprise that hers is also the castle. Except a lot more like its real life counterpart. Everything is pristine, even the staff, although a lot less lively. The one thing that is off though is that plants seem to be everywhere and faint piano music seems to follow wherever you go. If you look out the window you'll se an odd mix of sunny weather and thick fog surrounding the castle, as if hiding any memory from before she was there.
Laura: it's an odd mix between the Beneviento house and various rooms of the castle inside. The basement seems to stretch on and on until the halls resemble the ancient stone of the castle, complete with the crest on the doors. Some doors are barricaded or just locked, with a key that only luck would help you find. Outside the house, the garden seems much bigger, the only thing interrupting the greenery is the cemetery and it's locked gate. Not that you should enter, lest you risk your ankles getting grabbed by something making its way out from the earth.
Cassandra: the dungeons but they stretch on and on and on. They look slightly different though. For one, some parts are pristine while others look like the usual gory mess. There are, oddly enough, windows from time to time that overlook an unfamiliar city but the rest is fog. There's no way to get to that city so it's always something distant and unreachable. The walls are littered with what looks like anatomical diagrams but they actually have memories written on them. There are hounds wandering around too, but they are friendly. Some will start speaking german though.
Nicole: vast endless hospital corridors but the lights are not quite right and look too warm to be the usual blue neons and the decorations mimic the ones in the castle. There are no patients and there's no staff. Sometimes you come across shelves that display various trinkets, though skulls are always among them and if you pick them up they may tell you something. Could be a memory or could be a passage from a book long forgotten. Many rooms contain memories, some just have the smell of alcohol seemingly soaked into the walls, some have the angry voice of her father yelling from behind the door, and have heavy locks in place. But some have scenes of her family during happy moments.
Daniela: the castle but all the walls are covered in bookshelves. The books contain memories but many are empty save for a few words, or downright scribbled over with ink or blood. The fog made it's way past the castle doors and cover certain parts of it, like old unused parts, almost forgotten except for the ghosts that seem to linger just by the edge of the mist. Her castle actually has staff, but it's all the ghostly apparitions she sees in real life. The vast majority of them are actually nice but the ones in the basement are cruel and only know how to scream about all her flaws, sometimes in the voices of her loved ones.
Anita: a small town, all the shops containing some sort of memory or a place she's been in. Beyond the glass it's past versions of her at a bar with friends, cheating on a test, getting reprimanded by her parents or frustratingly throwing her duster at a wall because Daniela is just like that. There are birds flying everywhere, magpies being the most prominent ones and some will even talk to you about little anecdotes or small things she lies. There is this one parrot that likes to tell embarrassing stories that looks suspiciously like the little budgie she had as a child.
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ahundredtimesover · 3 years
Text
He’s Leaving (FNTO 2)
They weren’t kidding when they said everything you touch turns into a mess.
Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: strangers to friends to lovers, popstar/idol!jk, fluff, angst, future smut; this is a dialogue-heavy series so read if you’re into that! JK’s angry in this one 
Warnings: foul language, these characters talk alot bc I talk alot, eventual smut
Word count: ~12,000
Series summary: You meet pop star/idol Jeon Jungkook at the cafe, you get close, and as Hyejin says, you’re like friends with benefits without the sex. But you’re bad at feelings and so is he.
series masterlist
A/N: This takes place 7 months after that night Y/N’s ex shows up! Italicized parts refer to past events. And since I’d mentioned this was initially for Harry, I remember now that Home by 1D was my mood for this, so listen to it as soundtrack (getting emotional while listening to it & thinking about how this ends)!   
#
He’s leaving. 
You stare blankly at the wall dividing your living room and bedroom and say the words once more, in your head and then out of your mouth.  
He’s leaving. 
You say it over and over again, alternating between question and statement. 
Jungkook’s leaving. 
“Yes, Y/N, that’s what I just said.” Jimin mutters over the phone.
“But why? I mean, since when does he leave ahead of all of you guys?”
“He decided to schedule a meeting with one of the producers he’s working with for his mixtape. It isn’t with your cousin, though, otherwise Jieun would’ve told you,” Jimin responds.
It’s the first week of August and the first show of the next leg of their world tour isn’t until a week from now, but Jungkook’s already headed to L.A. and he didn't even tell you about it. In fact, he hasn't said a word to you in the last five days, which is oddly surprising. 
“He hasn't spoken to you?” Jimin asks, picking up on your thoughts. Perhaps your silence gave away the frustration you were feeling. 
“Nope,” you reply, the sadness in your voice unmistakable. 
“I hope you don't think I’m one of those people who’s gotten so attached to him that being ignored for five days feels like the end of the world… because it really isn’t. I’m just worried and confused,” you continue. 
You aren’t blind. Jungkook’s surrounded by women, some vying for his attention, some wanting it back. They’d act out either way, displeasing him although he’d never say it out loud, but you were pretty sure you weren’t one of them. Right?
“Hey, of course not! As both of your friends, even I’m surprised. You two are like, inseparable, long-distance buddies,” he claims. “But to tell you the truth, I have no idea what’s going on either. Are you sure you didn't fight for real this time?” 
No real fights, you say. Your arguments about who has better smelling detergent or your choice of movie to watch or him stealing your oversized sweatshirts were as far as you two went. You often had serious talks, but when you didn't see eye to eye, you always just agreed to disagree, and then it was back to petty fights and annoying each other like little kids again. 
“I’ve to head out now, Y/N. I’m sorry I couldn't help, but I hope you two patch things up! Just call if you need anything,” Jimin says after a few more back and forth of questions and answers about how the past week or so has been, just to pick up on any clues as to why things just suddenly came to a halt. You put your phone away and sit on the couch.
A few months ago, it probably wouldn't have mattered if he didn't text or call for a day or a week. You couldn't even truly come to terms with the fact that you’ve become good friends with Jeon Jungkook, the ‘golden maknae’ and self-proclaimed international playboy of the biggest band in the world who has the unenviable position of being half the female population’s (and a good fraction of the male’s as well) dream everything. 
It amazed you how this oversized-clothes wearing boy with a bunny smile and doe eyes and who liked to talk to insects and impersonate chickens and act out Ironman fight scenes could arouse the sexual musings of individuals of all genders and ages. But then again, he does have that mellifluous voice and has this tendency to hump the air and dance wildly enough to reveal his abs, so you do understand the collective reaction.
For a high profile celebrity like him, it seems natural to be drawn to people from the same industry, for romance purposes or otherwise. Much of it has to do with the fact that they get the lifestyle, as his other band mates have shared, some of whom having dated fellow pop stars and models. But you aren’t from the same circle, or clique, or planet. While you’re your university’s star athlete, volleyball isn’t religion here, so there isn’t any “lifestyle change” of some sort. 
Before Jungkook, your only window to celebrity life was through Jieun, your LA-based music producer of a cousin. Yet, you’ve always been wary of the spotlight, and those who loved it too much, which is why it baffled you for quite a while why you were so fond of Jungkook. He loved the spotlight enough to make his job look so easy, but he felt real  — so real you almost thought he wasn't. 
#
The midway mark of September has rolled in. Once the celebrations of your championship win over the summer were over, it was back to focusing on work and school. You’ve started your probationary period at a research institute, and you’re riding out your fifth year of university after your senior year knee injury left you out of school for a month and out of the graduation rites. This meant a chance to actually win the championship, which you did, and to appease your ever growing interest in gender studies, you decided to take up a minor program too. 
It’s 8 am on a Monday and you’re enjoying your iced americano at Annie’s, your aunt’s café that she lets you run to help sustain your lifestyle. You monitor the daily operations, which means checking up on it everyday, and since class isn’t until nine, you always have your breakfast here. 
Your back is turned to the door and you’re packing up your stuff, laughing at something Woojin, your café manager, is saying. 
You stand up, swing your bag strap to your right shoulder and without paying attention, turn to your left to head out. Except instead of going for the door, you go for a body instead. The next thing you know, you’re massaging the right side of your forehead because holy crap this person has a knife for a chin, or a shoulder, or whichever part of the person’s body hit you. 
“Ow!”
“I. Am. So. Sorry,” the person says. His voice is low and raspy, sleepiness still evident in it, and he says those words as if each is a sentence on its own. “Are you alright?” 
By this time it has registered. You are looking up at the man who made your then-65 year old Grandma shriek. But that was last year and you bet if she were still alive now, she’d do the same, probably even louder. 
You could hear customers enjoying their morning coffee whisper quite loudly “Is that Jeon Jungkook?!” And then it registers again. Yep, it is.
Eyes wide, you tell him that “good thing I don’t have coffee or that pretty white shirt of yours would’ve been messed up.” 
Really, that’s what you say? 
God, you sound so stupid, so you bat your eyelashes and put on a smile, as if that would save you the embarrassment. He grins.
“Yeah, good thing you didn't,” he says, letting out a little laugh.
You smile again, a bit awkwardly though, just to acknowledge his appreciation of you not ruining his Monday morning. As you’re about to step to your left to go for the door this time, he furrows his eyebrows. “You look familiar. Have I seen you somewhere?” 
Well, you know where you’ve seen him, but you don't say that. Instead, you mumble “probably in your dreams?” Again, what? 
He laughs again, this time more loudly. You’re amused at the child-like tone of his laugh, a complete contradiction to his toned body and tattooed arm. Your eyes travel up. Right, that was his shoulder you hit, you realize.
This is such a turn-off. Why does he keep laughing at stupid things? 
“That sounded different in my head. It wasn't supposed to be a pick-up line if ever you thought so,” you clarify. 
“No I didn’t, but thanks for confirming,” he says. You notice him smirking.
“Well, that settles it, then. Bye!” You wave, and you go for the door, for real this time. 
It was an interesting way to start the week. You rarely have VIPs entering your café, especially in this quiet part of town, and so it’s quite a surprise to have him check it out. What’s even more surprising is seeing him there again the next day.
Your back isn’t to the door this time, but you’re zoned in on the paper you’re working on, eyes focusing on the laptop screen. It’s only when you momentarily look up and see Woojin preoccupied and seemingly distressed on the phone that you hear someone say, “excuse me” with his inked hand up that you realize your VIP is back. You stand up, approach him, and ask what he wants to order.
Jungkook’s face lights up. “Well, good morning, dream girl,” he greets. You flinch at the thought of what you said the day before implied. 
“Please don’t,” you plead, before exploding into laughter. “Not my best moment, eh?” 
He smiles again, shaking his head as if agreeing to what you just said.
“What do you want to order?” 
“So… Annie?” He diverts.
You aren’t sure if you’re happy that asking for your name means he won’t have to call you dream girl again, or embarrassed because now there would be a name to the face. 
“Annie’s my aunt, but I help run the place. It’s Y/N.”
“And I’m Jungkook,” he says, putting out his hand, as if you don't know who he is, which actually impresses you. You’ve heard of famous people's tendencies to act like everyone knows them, making them forego the courtesy of introducing themselves properly. You shake his hand, a little calloused but soft nonetheless. “This is Sejin. He told me about this place and how good it is,” he continues.
“Which is why you’re here for the second day this week?” you ask, fishing for some feedback on your food. 
“I wanted to get back at the girl who would’ve spilled coffee on my shirt yesterday. Turns out this place has some great food as well,” he says, a smile creeping onto his face. You aren’t quite sure what to make of this. 
You insist on their orders, suggest your bestsellers, and turn it over to the kitchen. As you’re about to head back to your seat, he says, “I remember where I know you from!” You look at him, curious. 
“You’re Jieun’s cousin! She always posts about you,” he excitedly claims. 
You nod. Of course, Jieun. You could’ve figured that out and told him yesterday instead of the dream girl thing. 
“Right. Jieun,” you start. “She sucks up to me like that to convince me to visit her in L.A.,” you explain. You try to keep your voice steady. You don’t want to give the impression that having this conversation with him is already the most interesting part of your week, even if it is. Who gets to say that Jeon Jungkook recognizes their face anyway?
“You don’t like L.A.?” He asks curiously.
“It’s just not my cup of tea,” you respond, angling your body to move towards your table, but facing him still. You’re glad that the morning rush has ended and there aren’t many people in the cafe who minds enough that you’re talking to Jeon Jungkook. 
“Then what is?” he asks, arms crossed against his chest, looking genuinely curious. 
You let out a laugh. “Jasmine, chamomile. Lemongrass on some days,” you say. “We’ve got good ones you should try,” you tease. 
You aren’t the type to spill things about you that easily, and he picks this one up. He nods and smiles. The only other thing he says to you before you leave is that the food is good, and that he’d “see you around.” 
Of course he would, because for the rest of the week, he kept going back, right around the same time as you’re there. This isn't new, of course. You have so many customers who come everyday at a particular time — right before school or work or just part of their daily routine. But he didn't fit the profile of a regular customer, but you also could admit it was nice to see a fresh face around. 
It’s Thursday of that week when he tells you “I have meetings and stuff in this area and your food’s really good,” after you give him a questioning look as to why he’s here again. And it’s the next day when he comes alone, orders jasmine tea for himself and for you, and asks for your number after you talk about Disney movies and the damsel in distress trope. And cats, and how much you hate them. 
~
You have your back lying on the couch for 10 minutes, debating on whether you should drive to his place and ask what’s going on, or stay home and settle on phone calls for the next 2 months that he’ll be gone for the tour, if he’ll even pick them up. Because you’ve tried—you’ve called and left messages, not to ask why he hasn't been texting or if anything’s wrong, but just to crack up jokes that are way funnier than his, or to talk about food. You know, normal things. 
You like how your texts never start with “good morning” and “what are you doing?” They’re usually along the lines of “some cat left a paw mark on my car, my day is ruined” or “I tripped in front of an old lady and she almost died laughing” or “what movie should I watch if I want to forget I have a shit load of work to do” or a picture of whatever food you ate that day. 
Things are never formal with you two. It’s always very casual that sometimes you forget that his “show’s about to go on, I’ll talk to you later” text means he’s just about to perform in a sold-out stadium in front of thousands of people in Japan or something — like it was no big deal. Or that his “hang on, someone will just talk to me” is really code for “I’ve got an interview,” which you know will be newsflash and then posted all over social media immediately after. You enjoy this bit because it feels so natural, neither of you feel like you have to impress the other. 
“Will you stop air fucking and pole dancing on the mic stand,” you’d say. 
“Stop talking to me and do your report already,” he’d say. 
“Seriously, why are your clothes 3 sizes bigger? How much food are you hiding in there?” You’d laugh over the phone. 
“Your sweatshirt looks like shit, can I have it?” he’d annoy you, and then proceed to take it home. 
You like making fun of each other as much as you like talking to each other. He’s easy to get along with and not pretentious; you’re comfortable to be around and not judgemental. He doesn’t have a problem telling you if you’re being too whiny; you don't mind calling him out for being too much of a perfectionist that he’s actually not being productive anymore. 
Jimin was right when he described you two as inseparable, long-distance buddies — whether it was a night out with friends or a night in doing papers, if it didn’t clash with his schedule, you were together. Even if it was a quick take out dinner at 11PM  after a long day of practicing, he’d be at your place.
Whenever he’s away on tour, he’d be constantly updating you about fan signs and the food and the weather; similarly, you’d update him on the café’s customer of the day or this new e-book you’d discovered or the weird dream you just had. You never feel any sort of pressure or expectation; neither of you feel too attached, despite the amount of time you spend together. 
Regardless of how your constant texting or hanging out when he was back in Seoul seems like to others, neither of you ever felt like you had to define what you two really are. That’s what you always think the reason is as to why it works — it just does because you don't feel like it has to go a specific direction. 
Despite all that, it still feels odd that he hasn’t been returning your calls or even updating you on how his day has been. The longest you’d gone without talking was 3 days, and that’s with a heads up. The next few months will be crazy for the band, what with the remaining shows of their tour. It isn't like him to just disappear from your life like this. 
“When was the last time you saw him?” your best friend Chaewon asks over the phone when you finally decide to call someone after finding out Jungkook’s leaving.
“He’s not lost, okay. He’s just not calling,” you correct her. “But last week, we went for a drive, he slept over, and that was it. He just…” you trail. You aren’t even sure how to describe what just happened. 
“Then why don’t you go over there?” She asks, almost as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 
“I don't know, it might get messy. You know I’m not good with confrontations.”
“Just go, Y/N. He probably won’t be calling you after he’s left if he’d been dodging you like this.” 
Chae hangs up shortly after. You figure she probably doesn't want to hear another one of your excuses. You take your best friend’s advice and head for the door, get in your car, and take the 30-minute drive to his house.  
#
“I like to leave,” you tell him. You glance to your right where he sits at the passenger seat of your car then look back on the road. You and Jungkook had just spent dinner with your friends at Chaewon’s apartment and you told him you could drive him back to the dorm. 
He gives you a puzzling look. “Is that some sort of warning that I’ll wake up one day and you’ll just be… gone?” he asks, eyebrows scrunched up. You could see there’s a hint of concern on his face. 
“Oh, I meant I like taking trips,” you laugh, realizing the oddity of what you had just said, which was a response to Jaehyun, your other best friend, mentioning you being voted as ‘most likely to evaporate into thin air’ in high school. 
“Some days I wake up and just feel like being someplace else. So I grab my backpack and my trusty map, get into my car, and head out. By myself. Somewhere,” you say, shrugging, like it’s the most natural thing that people do. 
You describe to him the places you’ve seen — the lakes and mountains and fields that many people don’t know about, how the sunsets are like from there, how the trees and flowers smell like, how otherworldly they look. 
Most of the time, when you’re plagued with fear or sadness or doubt, you just leave. It’s your quick fix, your Band-Aid. You could be gone for a day or over the weekend; sometimes you’d be out for a week and not even your best friends know where you are, just that you’re safe. 
“But why?” he asks. You think it was ironic since this is a guy who leaves for a living. 
“When I was younger, we had this class and the teacher asked us to draw an object that represents us. I didn't even have a clear idea of who I was, how could I find the right object to symbolize me? You’ve got to find yourself, that’s how you’ll know, she said. I asked her how. She told me to go look at a map,” you narrate, looking back at that moment when you stared at your teacher trying to figure out if she was kidding or not. 
“I guess you find yourself in places you don't know. Or you realize who you really are when things get chaotic and you go somewhere far. Or you pull yourself away from the crazy to take a breath and escape some things you’re not really ready to face…” you state. 
“I never knew exactly what she meant, but I figured they all made sense,” you continue, slowing down the car as you’re a block away from his place. “You’ll always find a reason to leave.”
“But does leaving solve any of your problems?” 
“Not always, but sometimes the problem is nothing that you leave behind. Sometimes the problem is you.” You’d thought about the times you came back and felt like a different person with a different perspective on things. 
You look at him smiling, and you realize he’s been looking at you the whole time. You pull on the brakes, ready to say your goodnight, but he isn’t quite finished.
“What’s your favorite thing about leaving?” 
There are so many things you love about it. You love how it means you have the freedom and capability to do anything you want. You love seeing new scenery, discovering places for the first time, meeting new people and learning their stories. It is such a human thing to want to leave, you think. You like everything about it, even the parts where you get completely lost or rained or snowed on because you weren’t prepared. 
“Coming home,” you say. 
He softens at this, a pleased look on his face. 
“It’s like you’re gone for awhile and you see things for the first time, but then you drive back and you start seeing the familiar things — the streetlights, the driveways, the parks, the cafes… And all those constant things, they’re still there even when you leave, like they’re just waiting for you to come back.” 
“You should know that. You’re always jetting off somewhere new,” you say. 
“I leave because I have to. It’s part of the job.”
~
That conversation is ringing in your head the whole car ride to Jungkook’s house. Your knack for driving off is one of those things you never really share with anyone apart from your best friends. You never liked the thought of having to explain yourself to people, especially those you haven’t known for long, but with Jungkook, it never felt like you had to explain anything; you were always just sharing pieces of yourself that you knew he appreciated, that he somehow understood. 
You pull up behind the black SUV parked in front of his place; the same SUV that you know his driver uses to take him to the airport. You turn off the engine and go through the half opened gate, up the steps and through the door. 
You greet one of the members of his security team as she heads out the door and your eyes immediately turn to the two black duffel bags lying on the floor. They’re plump and full of things. You imagine all his black hoodies and sweatpants and leather jackets. You picture the bucket hats all neatly folded and his favorite Balenciaga sneakers tucked in somewhere. It feels weird, standing here at his foyer and just waiting for something to happen. 
You hear steps skipping down the stairs and his voice, assuring “I’ll call you when I get there” to someone on the phone. 
He’s looking down on it, texting someone who isn’t you. He does a double take, probably not expecting to see you standing by his door with a sad and confused look on your face. 
You’re fidgety and you feel nervous. You never liked confrontations, even if you were convincing yourself that is not why you came here in the first place. You just want to see how he was doing, maybe ask what he’s been up to, wish him luck on the shows and that you’d see him when he gets back in two months. 
“Y/N…” he starts. “I wasn't expecting you to be here.”
“Why, because you didn’t expect me to know you were leaving because you didn't tell me?” You say too quickly, resolve dissipating, tone and voice betraying you.
He looks taken aback. “Does it matter that I didn’t?” He says defensively, pulling up his duffel bags on a chair and seemingly looking for something inside one of them. You know he’s just distracting himself so he wouldn't have to look at you. 
“You go home to your parents for three days and you ask to see me the day before, and now you leave for North America for two months and suddenly it doesn't matter that you don’t tell me?” Your voice is getting louder and you immediately wish you hadn’t come here at all. It seems like he doesn’t want you to be here just the same. 
“You didn't even bother returning my calls or texts. And now you’re leaving. Your first show isn’t even until a week from now,” you say, crossing your arms. “What’s the rush?”
“I have a meeting with a producer,” he responds.
“That you couldn’t do during your free days there?” You snap back. You know this, you know they’re given some free time and he could’ve easily slipped that in there.
He sighs, knowing he can’t get out of this one. “I just want to be away from here, that’s all,” he says, glancing at you and then back at his bags. 
“You mean away from me?” 
He continues shuffling things in his duffel. He doesn’t even respond. You know it. He’s leaving because he wants to be away from you. 
“What’s going on, Jungkook? One day we’re laughing our butts off until we fall asleep and the next you just… not call at all.”
“I just didn't feel like it, I guess,” he says, zipping one of the bags and adjusting its strap.
This infuriates you.
“Well that’s nice. It seemed like you always felt like coming over with dinner, keeping me company while I worked, convincing me to go out for drinks, meeting me at the café for breakfast but then all of a sudden you don’t feel like calling?” You bite back.
He’s silent for a while, as if finding the right words to say. 
“You know what else is nice?” he starts, looking at you. “Calling me to come over on Friday nights when you don't feel like being out, asking me to stay the night and having me sleep next to you, kissing me and then telling me that ‘this feels nice and comfortable and fun’ and that I really am a great friend’.” His tone is angry, frustrated, desperate.
You feel your jaw drop open even if it’s closed. You did not see this coming at all. You always felt like you two were on the same page, that you like each other’s company so much that you prefer staying in on Fridays watching movies or National Geographic. You thought you both understand that sleeping next to each other only means you want to talk and laugh until you fall asleep, which is what happens all the time. You kiss then, which you treat like a goodbye because you don’t know if he’ll be there when you wake up. 
“I never thought of you as the selfish and unfair type, but I guess there’s just too many layers of you that it takes time before this side of you comes out.” He swings both his bags to his right shoulder, hinting that he’s ready to leave, that he’s ready to leave things like this. 
He starts walking towards the door. “They weren’t kidding when they said everything you touch turns into a mess.”
Your eyes widen in shock. “What the fuck, Jeon,” is all you could say. You’d never seen him this upset. Worse, you’d never seen him this upset at you.
“So what, I turned us into this big mess and you leave just like that? Like it’s not even worth talking to me about whatever it is you’re feeling?” you ask, following his movements. He’s halfway out the door by this time. 
You follow him out, overtake him and make sure he could see your face. “Leaving doesn't always solve problems.”
“Well, Y/N, sometimes it does. Because sometimes you’re not the problem, it’s what you leave behind.”
You look at his face, trying to find pieces of him you thought you’d figured out. He turns away, not wanting to see you like this. You see him soften a little bit, like he didn't mean for things to turn out this way, but you know he isn’t going to let up. You have so many questions running through your mind. What did this all mean? What’s going to happen now? 
“It’s sad how when someone you care about tells you exactly what you are to them, you realize at that moment what they are to you, and it’s the complete opposite.” 
He turns to look at you this time, his face screaming a kind of sadness you’d never seen before. You’d talked about him being homesick all these years when he’s out on tour. He’d shared how the gossip and his negative image have affected him and his relationships. He’d talked about how difficult it was holding onto things and people that were real, but none of those moments could compare to this one and to this look he has on right now that lets you know he’s upset and it has everything to do with you. 
You’re the one he’s leaving behind. You’re the mess he wants to get away from. You’re probably the last person he wants to see before flying out because you’re the problem he doesn't want to deal with. 
“Jungkook…” you start, although you have absolutely no idea what you want to say. You look at him, eyes pleading for something, anything. 
“I have to go,” is all he says. He turns around, clutching his bags over his shoulders, and walks away.
No ‘see you around’ or ‘I’ll call you soon’ like always. It was just ‘I have to go,’ like it was the period to the past months you two have been hanging out. ‘I have to go,’ like ‘leaving you is this need I have to fulfill.’ ‘I have to go,’ like, ‘this is it.’ 
You watch him walk out the gate. You watch the car drive away. There’s always something poetic about watching someone leave. You’d been used to that growing up. Your parents were always leaving, saving lives in places that needed saving, but you always knew they’d still be thinking about you and missing you while they were away. 
But with Jungkook, it was different. You hadn’t quite gotten used to him leaving all the time, and right now, you aren’t sure he’d be thinking about you or missing you while he was gone. 
‘I have to go,’ he said. Like, ‘I’m leaving. I don't want to stick around. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be with you.’
#
Things don’t feel real. You’ve been driving for 30 minutes, unsure where to go, reeling over the conversation you just had with Jungkook, if you could even call it that. It’s like he just dropped a bomb on you that you didn't know he’d had all this time. 
There was so much frustration and sadness on his face that morning and you couldn't get the image out of your head. What have you done? You kept asking yourself. 
But you reason that none of this is your fault. You thought everything was clear between the both of you. Sure, you never really talked about it, but if he was really feeling differently about you, then why didn't he just say something? 
“I’m heading out,” you say to Jaehyun over the phone. He’s always the first person you call when you feel like driving off.
“I’m guessing the talk with Jungkook didn't turn out well?” he asks. 
You don’t respond. You don’t really want to say anything to your friends about all this until you’ve figured things out. 
“Chae told me,” he says, interrupting the silence. 
“Yeah, I figured,” you reply. Information is so fluid between the both of them.
“So where are you off to?” 
“I don't really know, just wherever,” you say, but you know exactly where you’re going. It will just take another hour until you get there.
“Alright, just be safe,” he says, before hanging up. 
You step on the gas and turn on the music. Anything is better than the silence that’s ringing in your ears right now. You hum to the tunes of Colde and LeeHi, praying to the heavens you won’t hear Jungkook’s voice on the next song. This is your ‘favorites’ playlist and he had sneakily included some of his band’s songs one day when you went out to the market to grab some fruits and he stayed at your place watching TV. 
About 60 minutes later, you reach the place. It’s en route to a town a couple of miles south of the city. It’s a turn to the corner, onto a dirt road and a path lined with shrubs and small trees. The entrance to the main beach is right off the highway about a mile away, but you’d discovered this entrance not long ago when you drove off on a Sunday, two days after your ex-boyfriend came knocking at your door months after he broke up with you. It was the first time you spoke since then, and it was also the first time he ever tried to explain himself to you. You remember that trip; it was 7 months ago and it was also the last time you’d been here. Somehow you just felt the pull of this place. 
You realize later on, as you sit on the shore watching the sky turn purple and orange, that you told Jungkook about this when you were here. 
You watched the sunset then just like today. It looked so beautiful and so you snapped a picture and sent it to him. He was in Japan at that time for an event. You’d told him you’d fallen asleep and were just listening to the waves crash on the shore — your favorite sound in the world, you’d said. When it was all over, you decided to call it a day. 
“I’m driving back now,” you’d told him. “Okay,” he responded, voice tired from the day he had. It was rare for you to talk to anyone when you were out. You felt like a part of home was tugging at you when you did. But Jungkook was away and you just wanted him to see what you were seeing. You felt it was a way for you to tell him that you were fine. He didn’t seem convinced when he’d left your apartment that Friday night after Jinyoung visited. The photo you sent of the sunset, and the next one of you lying on the sand, smiling, were enough to convince him that indeed you were. 
“Okay. Hold on to the feeling once you see the familiar,” he’d said. He knew you loved that feeling. He always said he imagined a smile creeping from the left side of your mouth when you realized you were nearing home.
“You’re familiar, Jeon,” you’d told him.  
You liked the idea, that you saw him as something familiar. You’d only known each other then for a few months but you’d talked as if it had been years. He was away but he still felt constant. 
“So are you, Y/L/N,” he replied. 
You were thinking about this, about him, as the dust settled and the sky’s now a pretty dark blue with tiny hints of burnt orange. The waves still sound majestic, truly something you can never get tired of. You feel the cold autumn air tingle your insides. You close your eyes and breathe in to try to immerse yourself in your surroundings, hoping against hope that something will click and things will make sense.
You’d spent the whole afternoon here yet you feel like nothing’s changed. He is on the plane to California and you’re still confused. You still have the same questions from last week, from this morning. He’s still your constant; you just aren’t sure if you’re still his. 
Leaving doesn't always solve problems, you told yourself. You just wished you’d told him one more time. Maybe he would’ve stayed. 
#
“We’re having Spanish,” Chaewon says as you enter her apartment. “And you’re late.” She continues, turning to you with slices of apples and oranges in her hands. You could hear the laughter and the cheers from the living room. Nobody’s minding you because a soccer game is on. 
You envy their energy — why you agreed to continue to help run the cafe even with a full-time job, you don’t know, but it’s starting to take  its toll on you and all you want to do is sleep. Jungkook and the guys will soon be in full preparation mode for the start of the tour and  your superstar friend, who had now also claimed your own friends, wanted to have dinner with everyone before things got too busy.
“You cooked?” you ask, returning your gaze to her after looking out on who is already here.
“Nope. Take-out. But the Sangria is homemade.” 
“Take-out?” you repeat, excitedly,  making your way to the table to check on the food. 
“Jungkook wanted Spanish and take-out,” Chaewon confirms, as laughter roars from the living room. 
You walk over to check on everybody else who all acknowledge your presence with air fist bumps. 
“So you’ve moved past Chinese and Japanese take-out and have gone for Spanish now, huh, Jeon?” you question. He gives you his signature bunny smile from his seat on the floor. He does that quite often when he’s showing off or after he’s done something nice. 
“Hey, it’s a classy place and I get a discount. And, Chae sounded tired when I called so I took it upon myself to save dinner,” he proudly declares, standing up and motioning towards you. How cocky, you think, but you return his pinch on your cheek with a pinch on his nose.
Dinner is as fun as dinner with your friends always goes, but your hectic schedule that day made you extremely tired. After moving to the couch and a glass of Sangria later, you feel your head spinning and rest it on Jungkook’s shoulder. He notices your tired face, nudges at you and says he’s going to take you home. “Thanks, Jeon,” you murmur under your breath. “I promise I won’t puke.”
It takes a few glasses of water and a handful of profiteroles to get you sobered up and ready to head out. He helps you get in his car and you retreat to a semi-fetus position until the next corner. 
“You’re really tired, aren’t you? You’re never this quiet during a car ride. Even when you’re drunk you won’t stop talking… or singing,” he teases. “Out of tune, I might add.” 
You sit up from your sulking position. “Sometimes I just want to choke you, you know” you remark with a serious face. 
“Do you want to feel the wrath of my women?” he questions, winking, referring to his army of fans who are protective of him, and for good reason. 
“They’d probably want to do the same, only in a sexual way.” At this he laughs, shaking his head as if to say you’d done it again, teased him like this and made his cheeks blush.
The ride is a quick one for a Thursday night. You feel you haven't made fun of him enough as he pulls the brakes in front of your apartment building and immediately steps out and walks to your side before you could even thank him and say goodbye. 
He opens the door and pulls you out like it’s routine, although you clearly remember he’d brought you home when you were drunk only twice, one of which was when he’d found you half-naked in your kitchen with a knife, ready to attack him. Since then, Jungkook had made sure to never let you be that drunk again, and always made it a point to feed you sweets so you’d stay awake. 
He’s successful though — you’re sober and awake tonight. You’re just really tired. 
You unlock your apartment door and he steps in with you, goes straight to your kitchen and makes you tea. He knows that chamomile makes you sleep well, and that’s exactly what he prepares.
“So comfortable in my place already, Jeon,” you say after realizing what he’s doing. He just knows in what cupboard your mug is kept, and in which box the chamomile is stored, and how much sugar you put, but then again, he did help you quite a bit organize your kitchenware. He opens a drawer to get aspirin - “Just in case,” he says. You watch him like he had done this many times before. 
A small smile forms on your lips. 
“Look, you’re tired and I convinced you to come tonight. If you don't sleep well, you’ll wake up in a bad mood and complain to me again that your neighbor’s cat is loitering on your steps… and then you’ll blame me.”
You laugh. For someone who deals with so many people everyday, it amazes you how well he remembers things about you like that.
“I was about to say how I like hanging out with you because you make me coffee or tea…”
“You’d do the same for me, Y/N, no matter how much you want to stop yourself from doing so.” He winks at you, tastes the tea, and places it on the counter. 
You sit on the chair and feel the aroma of the tea soothe you. He stands there watching you, pleased with what he’s done. “You good?” he asks, and you nod behind your mug.
You don’t need to be taken care of, you’d told him once. You don’t need someone to be looking out for you when you’re drunk and being clumsy, when you’re busy and not eating, when you’re injured and unable to walk properly, when you’re stressed and needed a break. 
“If you don’t want me here you could always just tell me, you know?” he’d said once. “I won’t take it personally. We’re good with each other that way.” 
But you never asked him to leave. In fact, you always wanted him to stay, always asked him to.
“Ready to call it a night?” he questions, after you put down your empty mug.
You look up at him. You could feel your eyes falling and your body aching for a warm shower and your sheets. It’s been a crazy week and it isn’t even over. You want to rest, but you also don't want to be alone.
“Can you stay?” you ask, biting your lip and trying hard to pull off your puppy eyes so he’d say yes. 
“Sure,” he says. He didn’t wait for an explanation. He didn’t need one. He just understood.
You give him a warm smile. 
“I know you love my couch, but I might forget in the morning you’re here and I might stab you for real this time,” you state. “The bed’s big enough for both of us and Chandler,” you offer, referring to your hedgehog stuffed toy that’s about half your size. 
“At least I get a blanket!” he claims.   
“Thanks, Jeon.” 
A soft smile appears on his face. “Anything for you, Y/N.”
~
By the time you decide to leave the beach, the sky has already settled in a midnight blue. The waves are crashing, and from across the water, you could see lights from the small town not so far away. You think about spending the night there, or driving someplace else and sleeping in your car until the next morning. But you decide to go home, even if you know you’ll just be thinking about him more if you do.
You turn on your engine, put the windows down, and listen to the wind. You think about this morning again. You’re still in denial that he’d said what he did and the implication that you probably led him on all these months. 
But you’re convincing yourself that he couldn't pin this on you — he was always calling, he was always texting, he always wanted to be with you after a busy week, he always made it up to you when he couldn’t come over, he always stayed when you asked him to. 
You two kissed, but it was a soft one, not ravenous or lust-filled. He didn't pull away and you didn’t try to deepen it. But he looked so good after their show and he was gonna be gone for the tour and the alcohol was talking and you let it. 
You kissed again after that. There was no drunken night to blame it on the second time, but it was raining when you woke up the next day and he looked so warm and comfortable sleeping on your bed that you just felt like you had to. But he kissed you back, softly still, and he didn't say anything. He didn't pull you in for another one after. 
If he really felt anything, then he should have. He should have grabbed you and told you he wanted more, that he was feeling differently, that things were changing. He should’ve done it then or any other time after that. He was always honest with you, but you didn't understand why he wasn't honest about this one, why he decided to just stop things and leave you hanging. 
Maybe you weren’t away long enough, because you didn't even realize that you were already home until you saw your neighbor’s white sedan parked in your street. You pull the brakes and park behind it, thinking you were probably absent-minded the entire ride back. 
There’s no warm feeling inside that you’re back. This wasn’t a trip that was meant to change anything or make you figure out how to fix things. All you thought about was that you miss him terribly, and maybe that’s what it was meant for, rub in your face that he’s gone. 
You drag yourself up the stairs and enter your place. It suddenly feels like he’s everywhere in your apartment. You’d moved in last year and not even your best friends or your mom had imprinted enough of themselves inside.
There’s the cup Jungkook bought for you after he broke one of your favorites. There’s this pack of granola bars in your pantry that he got so you wouldn't have to gobble up ice cream when you were hungry. There’s the spare toothbrush he started using after his first night in. There’s your sweatshirt that he returned, and his hoodie that he said he’d get back the next time he sees you. 
And there’s the counter where you both shared take-out dinners and homemade breakfast. And there’s your couch where you spent nights working while he watched TV on mute. And there’s your bed where he’d slept next to you a few times. 
“I shouldn't have watched all those stupid chick flicks when he wasn't talking to me,” you think out loud. Now you’re left with an apartment that has him everywhere. 
You’re  not even together. You’ve shared so much of yourself to each other but never ‘I like you’s’ nor ‘I love you’s,’ not even ‘I miss you’, but why does it feel like you’ve shared all that and more? Why this sudden feeling of emptiness after he told you he had to go and then  left just like that? 
Everything you touch turns into a mess, he told you. 
Your friends joke about it all the time. Your penchant for trying anything that remotely interests you doesn’t necessarily mean you’re good at it. Whether it’s decorating those Valentine’s cookies that Hyejin bakes, molding those vases during a pottery class you impulsively signed up for, or even making pajeon when Chae said you couldn’t fry anything other than your broken-yolk eggs, you just have the tendency to end up with final products that are nothing like what you intended. In look or substance, they’re just not that pretty. Jungkook always laughed along.
But he said it to you today like it burned him. As if to say, look at what you’ve done, I don’t want to be a part of this. 
#
“So uhm, are you just going to sit there and watch us or are you going to help?” Jungkook asks from the floor of your living room, paintbrush in one hand, goodie bag in another. 
Body sprawled on your sofa with legs hanging and kicking off the armrest, you look at him with a pout. “Jaehyun doesn’t want me to.” 
Jaehyun sighs from where he’s sat on the floor. “It’s not that I don’t want to, Y/N. It’s that I can’t afford to.”
You roll your eyes. “Yeah, whatever,” bitterness apparent in your voice. 
It’s a Sunday and your friends are at your apartment to help Jaehyun decorate the goodie bags he’ll be distributing to the kids at the orphanage that he volunteers at. Twice a year, he throws them a party that requires decorating giveaway bags that contain the books and sweets he’s bought with his own money. Jungkook ended up there because, well, by now you don’t question him anymore. They had a day-off and he said he was bored.
“Jaehyun’s being kind. Y/N’s just really shit at these things so he doesn’t let her touch these,” she says, holding up a bag where she’d painted a rainbow. 
“You got the color order wrong,” you shoot at her. She responds with scowl.
“Come on, Jae. Pretty please. I promise I won’t mess them up like last time,” you plead to Jaehyun. You know he has a soft spot for you.
“You said that the last time, too” Hyejin chides. 
“Wow thanks, guys. No one’ll even pretend to be on my side, huh,” you sit up and frown at everyone.
“Y/N, we are, like, most of the time.” You glare at your friend. “But I spent my money on these and the party is already next week and I really want the kids to feel hopeful and inspired, not scared, okay? And I want them to actually keep the goodie bags, not throw them away. It’s nothing personal, I promise.”
“Yeah yeah, whatever,” you wave your hand at them and give up. 
This is a usual occurrence. You know you’re useless with anything that involves the arts that’s why your only contribution every time you guys help Jaehuyn is your apartment as a venue. 
Jungkook arrived an hour earlier with a glimmer and excitement on his face when he saw what your friends were doing, like a little kid at a candy store. He wasted no time and got right down to business. God, those kids who will get his bags would never know they were holding a goldmine. 
“So what happened the last time?” Jungkook asks. 
“She tried to draw a bear but it ended up looking like that character from the monsters cartoon, you know, the one holding its eyes?” Hyejin recalls, laughing as she recalls the proud look on your face and the distressed one on Jaehyun’s. “She tried to remedy it but like, just no. It looked terrible.” 
“No kid would feel hopeful with that,” Chaewon adds.
“I really had to do quality checks of her work and I threw them all away cause they’d gone lumpy. She didn’t even mix the paint well,” Jaehyun continues.
“Yah! I think Jungkook got the message, okay?” You start chuckling, seeing Jungkook’s amused face and his effort to not laugh along at the thought of you being shut down for something you thought was a pretty thing you created. “I’ve accepted that art isn’t my forte.”
“So is cooking, baking, pottery, organizing, arranging…” You throw Chaewon a pillow, smack to her face like she deserves.
“But seriously. Trust her to score the final point of a championship game or write a 30-page report on housewifization and its subordination of women but if it isn’t sports or research, forget it. Everything she touches turns into a mess. RIP to all the cookies and goodie bags and vases that never saw the light of day,” Hyejin dramatically claims. “It’s kind of her thing.”
You shrug. It kind of is your thing. Your unartistic, unorganized, and mindless chaotic ass, for the life of you, just can’t get it together. Clothes and shoes all over the place, gifts wrapped in frayed gift wrappers, cooked food looking inedible… relationships that crash and burn because you couldn’t decide if you wanted to care or not, because you did whatever you felt like just cause you wanted to, because you got too close and didn’t know when to pull away… Yeah, definitely.
You turned to your friends who were all back to being immersed in what they were doing, proud look on their faces at the pieces that will definitely give joy and warmth to whoever will get them.
“I just mess things up, though. At least I don’t break them.”
~
You wake up to the sound of your phone ringing in your ears, surprising you so much you almost fall off where you were lying. 
“I’m outside,” Hyejin says on the other line. You get up and open the door.
She turns to you after seeing the blanket on your couch, realizing you had slept there instead of your bed. “Too much of Jungkook in your room, huh?” she says, looking sad, not realizing there was too much of him everywhere. You had just been too tired to go to your room when you got home, but you didn’t answer. 
She takes your silence as a yes and walks to your kitchen to take out the bread and coffee she bought, then heads out to your terrace while you wash up in the bathroom. 
You sit in front of her and eat your breakfast quietly while she watches you take small bites of your cheese bread. You tell her everything that’s happened the past 24 hours — from Jimin’s call to Jungkook’s out-of-left-field outburst. 
“I think I led him on,” you say, head thrown back on the chair, eyes closed.
“Uh, you think?” Hyejin claims. 
“How come none of you ever said anything?” you ask, looking at her. Jungkook didn't say anything; your friends didn’t say anything… Were you that naïve? That selfish? That stupid? 
“Well, it’s not like you’d listen anyway,” she starts. “You always just do what you want. Like, sure constantly talk to the guy giving you heart eyes every time you look at him, go date the guy whose family is in Australia and would most likely go back and leave you, sure spend time and flirt with the insanely hot and kind and funny pop star… like there are no consequences to these things,” she unapologetically says.
“Is that so bad?” you ask. 
You don’t want to sound defensive. You don’t have the energy to really argue with anyone. 
“Come on, Y/N. Don’t tell me you didn't see this coming. With how you two were, one of you was bound to fall for the other.”
“We allowed ourselves to get that close, Hyejin, to be… this. Whatever this is. Or was. It’s not like we ever talked about it, though.” 
She raises an eyebrow at you.
“But I just figured we were both mature enough to handle the consequences. I just don't understand why it has to be this screwed up.”
She looks at you as if she’s looking right to your soul. “It’s like you ask someone to play fire with you, and you don't mind if you get burnt. You don't mind if they get burnt, too. That’s what it’s like.” 
“Getting burned is part of it. Getting hurt is part of it. I know that, and I always get over it,” you say. 
“Yeah, but the thing is, you expect the same thing from the other person, too.” 
You don’t like how right she is about all this.
“When you get hurt, you just walk away because you expect it and you accept it and then that’s it, goodbye to everything that was good. Move on to the next relationship that may or may not work out,” she continues.
You cover your face with your arms, as if somehow that’s going to be enough to make up for everything you’ve done.
“But that’s precisely why you always live in the moment, you know? To hell with being careful, or obsessing over whether or not doing something will hurt you. When you feel it that moment, you do it. And you’re okay if it hurts you, or if it leaves you with the shorter end of the stick. You get back on your feet right after anyway.”.
The day at the quad when Jinyoung broke up with you comes to mind. You didn’t even fight for it, you normally don’t; you’d rather spend that time getting over something  and moving on. 
“But Jungkook isn’t like that, Y/N,” she says, breaking you out of your thoughts. “Don't you get it? He won’t tell you he feels differently. He won’t tell you and right then and there, realizing you don't feel the same way, just accept it and get over it.”
You look back to that last morning you had together, the tangled limbs, the morning kiss, watching him get ready, the words “stay a little longer” almost slipping past your lips like always, but instead saying that it was nice and comfortable and fun. He smiled then. 
“Thanks for doing that for me; you really are a great friend,” is what you said before he left. So you weren’t dreaming the crestfallen look you saw on his face. With furrowed brows he took his phone, multiple messages probably telling him to go back to the dorm, and then he was gone. 
Your eyes widen at the memory. That’s what he was referring to. You’d been too frustrated at him ignoring you that you didn’t even bother to think of what might’ve triggered it. 
Hyejin seems to pick this up. “So are you now realizing you’re an idiot?” 
You smack her arm and she winces, deservedly so. 
“Okay, fine. I may have been one but to ignore me like that and then just leave? He waited last minute to tell me what he was feeling and then he fucking left, leaving me here confused and hurt and in agony. That’s way worse than my quick and easy,” you exclaim. 
“Sometimes people will cover up the pain rather than just say they’re hurt. Some hearts are wired that way, Y/N. Not everyone does quick and easy. Not everyone gets to accept their own feelings, and upon realizing they’re not reciprocated, moves on right away like you do.” 
You let everything sink in.
“It was my second time at that beach yesterday, you know?” You start after a long silence.
“The first time was after Jinyoung had come over to explain himself. I was already over the break up; I left to get over his reason for it. But yesterday when I was down there, all I could think about was how much I miss Jungkook. Like, it was the only thing going through my head the entire time I was there. He was always leaving but I always knew that when he got back, he’d be knocking at my door again…” you trail. You know it isn't going to be the same this time around. 
“People have their own reasons for leaving, you always say that. You can never fault them for why they choose to. You leave because you want to figure yourself out. He left because he probably didn't want to deal with what he’s feeling for you.”
Feelings. You always made sure to keep yours in check, but Hyejin was right; you also always expected the same from him.
You look out on the city and get lost in your thoughts. People always thought of you as someone who had things figured out - you know what you want from life and from those who are part of it. You’d walked away from people and let them walk away from you when you knew it had to happen. But this whole deal with Jungkook feels like unfamiliar territory. 
If it were someone else, you probably would’ve just let it go, but you keep thinking about Jungkook and the way his dimples still surprise you every time he smiles and how his laugh is so childlike and infectious it annoys you and warms your heart at the same time. 
You can't get off your head how it feels to hear him say ‘good morning’ when you wake up and find his arm gently resting on your waist, your fingers always tempted to trace the ink decorating his own. 
You warm at the thought of how he manages to make you feel better when you’re tired, how he never makes you feel hopeless when you’re being angry at all the unjust things in the world, how he reminds you of all the good there is during the times you forget. 
You think of how you don’t want to lose all that.
“Feelings…” you say. You couldn’t get used to the idea that he has them for you. 
“Do you have them too?” Hyejin finally asks. 
You were so hung up on how the past week has been, that he ignored you, that he left, that you didn't even stop to think of why, and more importantly, what you feel for him.
“I don’t know.”
“I’ve never seen you like this with anyone, though.”
“It’s because I’ve never been like this with anyone.”
“Like what?”
“Cautious?” 
“You mean, spending so much time together, constantly talking, kissing, is you being cautious?” She’s asks, incredulous.
You shrug. “It was never anything more.”
“Then why do you do them?” She snaps back.
“Because I want to? I’m always ready for him to turn me down.” It does surprise you every time he says yes to your requests, to your calls, your kisses. “But he never does.”
“But you don’t ask for anything more?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t want to.” 
Hyejin groans. “You’re giving me a headache.” 
“What did I say?!” 
“How can you want all of that and none of it at the same time? Seriously, you guys are like, friends with benefits without the sex…”. 
You throw her a piece of bread, scandalized with what she just said. But you laugh at this. Your friends had joked about that before; even his band mates agreed. You were everything and nothing at the same time, stuck in the grey scale that neither of you were willing to admit. Or move away from. 
“I think you just wanted everything - you wanted company, you wanted him to stay the night, you wanted to kiss, you wanted him to hold you,  you wanted to talk… You wanted to be friends.” When Hyejin says it like that, you do seem like a fool.
“But you didn’t want what those actually implied or even required from you,” she continues. “Almost like there’s this line you’ve set for both of you that only you can see.”
You sigh in frustration. You know when you drew that line, when you’d warned yourself to never cross it, when you’d promised yourself to never want more.
“I guess I always knew what I really felt… I probably just denied it or didn't want it enough,” you think out loud.
“So what now?” She finally asks the painfully obvious question. “What will you do now?”
“Wallow in my self misery and remind myself everyday that I'm an idiot,” you answer back.
“Hmm. You’re too easy on yourself,” she says.
You smack her arm again, which earns you a laugh from her. “I’m kidding! But seriously, now that everything's a little clear, what are you going to do?”
“Make things even clearer?” You sigh. “I feel like such a mess, Hyej. And he’s the one who usually cheers me up when I feel like shit but I can’t ask that from him, now can I?” You say, your body now slumped in your chair, feeling like you’re back to square one.
“You can’t and you won’t.” She walks over to you to pull you up like a big baby. “You’ve got 2 months to figure your shit out before he comes back. Better start now,” she says, as she ushers you back inside.
#
There’s continuous knocking on the door, causing you to get up from your seat on your work desk and you readied yourself to fight whoever decided to disturb your busy Saturday morning. 
You open the door and are greeted with a loud bellow, your name being sung in opera-style by a certain doe-eyed boy. 
“Jeon Jungkook, what are you doing! You’re gonna wake the neighbors,” you shout, pulling him inside.
“Your closest neighbor is an old woman who’s hard of hearing. I think we’re good,” he smiles, eyes all innocent-looking.
“What are you doing here?” You ask. It’s one of those rare Saturday’s when the guys are afforded a full day off - no practice, no show, no filming. He always looked forward to days like this, which you expect he’d spend sleeping in or exercising or playing Overwatch. 
“Got a free day,” he gleams.
“I know but what are you doing here?” 
“You’ve been cranky and whiny this whole week. And you don’t respond to my memes,” he says, pouty lips making him look like a little kid that hasn’t been given much attention.
“I told you it’s work. I’m short on time to work on my reports since I got dragged to this week-long event. But I think my brain cells have dissipated; I can’t seem to construct simple sentences anymore,” you sigh, heading for your couch to sink into. “I’m sorry for not responding to your memes.”
“I’ll forgive you only if you come with me.” 
“To where?” Your brow quirks up, finally taking in his baggy pants and loose white polo and bucket hat. “And what look are you going for with this whole get up?” You question, not missing the mismatched pieces of clothing and shades perched on his hat. 
“Something unassuming. I asked Jin hyung for advice and raided Tae’s closet,” he shrugs. 
“So what do you say? Come with me. Take a break! You won’t get any more productive being cooped up in here. Plus, artists need to go out for inspiration and you don’t seem like you’re getting it here,” he says with a smug look. You smack his arm, knowing that last bit he only said to mock you.
But it’s the words you always say to him; now he’s just saying them right back to you. “I promise to buy you snacks,” he says, reaching out his hand to you and pushing you to your room to get dressed.
And that promise he keeps. He rented a simple car so his luxurious one wouldn’t catch attention. You take a drive out of the city, sing your lungs out in the car, and go store hopping. You find supermarkets and convenience stores and little shops to look for different kinds of snacks that you both try and make reviews of. Every pretty view you see has you stopping the car and admiring the scene. 
You inhale the fresh air, something you don’t get much in the city, and you appreciate this. You get back to your place, complain about your tummy aches, laugh until you fall asleep, tangled limbs and all, but not before telling him it was the most fun you’d had in a while and your brain feels rejuvenated enough to get the reports done in the next few days. 
He falls asleep with that smile, the proud one he’d have on when you show your appreciation for him. He does like getting praises, that much you know.
You wake up to his quiet snores, cheek squished on the pillow with a hand over your waist, like always. You know you have to wake him up soon, which you do with a soft kiss, like always too. You watch him smile into the kiss and return it, until he finally opens his eyes to look at you. 
“Get up, sleepyhead. They’ll be calling you over soon,” you say. 
You watch him ready himself from your bed, still drowning in that kiss with a lazy smile on your face. You want to tell him to stay a little longer, even if you’re the one pushing him to get ready. 
You always want to say that, whether it’s walking out the door at night or getting up from your bed in the morning. You always want to ask him to stay a little bit more but you never do, thankful for whatever time he could spare you, careful not to ask for more than what he could give.
Yesterday was good. You’d been drowning in work, and you’d blown off your friends this past week and you knew that Jungkook had a busy week as well. But yesterday felt nice. He’d given up his own free day to be with you and he willingly did so, knowing that you need it without you saying it out loud. 
You had fun during the drive, and even more so exploring the store aisles, figuring out which brand of shrimp cracker or chocolate milk to get, buying all of them anyway, and excitedly opening them, finishing it all up and proceeding to give your review like those YouTubers you both liked to watch. 
It always feels like this with him, but you had been so tired and drained that being with him yesterday just made you feel so happy. It showed with how you constantly leaned into him, how you rested your head on his shoulder as he was deciding on the size of banana milk he would buy, knowing he’d be resting his head on yours as a response. 
You were missing physical affection and he was always willing to give you that, and you liked that he never seemed to ask for more. You’d initiate and he’d return, you’d pull and he’d let you, no questions asked. It felt comfortable enough, you thought. You didn’t have to explain yourself or your actions. It just always seemed like a given. 
He’d said that he was dealing with a lot already as a pop star, that stuck with you and you knew from then on it was code for him not wanting to get into a relationship, and despite having being single for a little over a year already, you had too much going on in your life too that you didn’t really need any commitments at this point. You were on the same page, for sure.
It was nice and comfortable and fun, that’s what you tell him. You’re referring to the day you had, and what it’s like with him too, in general. You watch him pull his gray hoodie over his head. The black one, his favorite, you’d worn the night before, and you hug yourself to say you don’t want to return it yet. 
He chuckles, “Fine. I’ll get it back the next time I see you.” You like his scent, but you’d never say this to him too.
You stand up to head to the kitchen, feeling refreshed and ready to be productive for the rest of the week. You know it had so much to do with the previous day, as if the laughter and smiles you had made up for that entire week when you barely did either. You give him a quick hug. “Thanks for that, Jungkook. You really are  a great friend.”
His face falls a little bit, as he clutches onto his phone to check the multiple messages probably telling him to go back home. You don’t think much of it. When you turn back to him, he’s gone.
~
part 1 drabble <<>> part 2 drabble
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the-killer-queenie · 3 years
Text
Baby's first word (dad!Joonas)
Hey! It finally happened; I wrote my first fic ever. I know, I'm shook too. The things Blind Channel are making me do🥴
I really want to thank @poodlejoonas 💜 (the culprit xP) for not only letting me run with her AU but also for being a total angel and proof reading, making corrections and suggesting ideas. I'm linking both of her fics incluiding dad!Joonas but all of her fics are totally worthy and so extraordinarily written: poodlejoonas's dad!Joonas fic (aka the fic that started all) // the BC guys as uncles
Hope y'all enjoy it!☺️
After one year and a half without shows, the world slowly started to open up which meant Blind Channel managed to get new gigs in what seemed like forever. Everyone was thrilled at the idea of playing shows again like before the pandemic hit. Sure, UMK and Eurovision were amazing experiences but playing multiple times and only one song couldn't beat the adrenaline of performing a proper setlist in front of a real crowd jumping and singing along.
To say that Joonas was really excited wasn’t enough. His time was split between rehearsals with the band and spending time with you and Sohvi at your home. As perfectionist as the boys were, they even had to encourage Joonas to leave some rehearsals earlier so he could spend some well-deserved time with his daughter. But even at your home, Joonas would keep practicing (not that you would complain, since you love hearing him play and sing) giving mini acoustic shows to a starstruck Sohvi, who would watch his dad with loving eyes and sloppily clap when the songs ended.
Of course, the thought of bringing you and his little daughter to one of the shows crossed his mind, but both of you decided to wait a little more before taking young Sohvi to one of the band's concerts.
Despite only being away for a weekend, Joonas left you both with him promising he’d try not to go off the rails, to which you laughed and reassured him not to worry as long as he found his way home.
Joonas had to leave really early in the morning. You weren’t even up yet but felt his kiss on your cheek. You also heard him making a stop at your daughter’s room to say his goodbye to an asleep Sohvi.
At around the time Joonas would come home from the studio, you heard Sohvi babbling in the living room. Since she couldn’t talk yet, she motioned towards Joonas’s guitar he kept in the corner of the room, which you took as her way of questioning where her father was. “Clever girl,” you said as you picked her up. “Daddy is playing songs like when he plays it for you before bedtime, but this time for thousands of people.'' You knew she couldn’t yet understand her father’s profession but she made happy noises, which you took as a sign of understanding. "Such a good girl," you said as you bopped her nose. “We can go to the park and then we can call daddy, okay?” you proposed, which was met with even more cheerful noises.
Joonas came back late at night. You were taking a shower when you heard the rattle of keys and the front door being open. Joonas was finally home, and he left his guitar and bag against the wall. He heard the shower, so the first thing he did as soon as he dropped his stuff was check on Sohvi in her bedroom, where she lay asleep in her crib clutching her teddy bear (a present from Uncle Tommi). He tucked her in and gave her a kiss on her forehead. You, having finished your shower, stood against the door frame, adoringly observing the scene. The scene lasted for a moment until Joonas, feeling your presence, turned around with a cheeky smile.
"Enjoying the view?"
"Hey, you rockstar."
Joonas approached you and hungrily kissed you. Breaking off the kiss, you started to close Sohvi's bedroom door, so you could talk without waking her up. Joonas took a last look at the little baby and whispered.
"She's such an angel."
"She really is."
You could tell he was still buzzing with excitement from the weekend he just had. He seemed really excited to talk about the show and how good it felt to play live again. But as enthusiastic as he looked, he also looked extremely tired, so you immediately demanded him to go to bed and get some rest, promising he could tell you all about it in the morning.
The next day was a day spent with family. The band decided to take a few days before starting new rehearsals and working on the next album. You forced Joonas to stay in bed as you prepared breakfast and brought it to him. After that, both of you spent the morning cuddling, until you heard Sohvi waking up. Joonas finally left bed to greet his little angel. Sohvi was still sleepy but thrilled to see her dad. “Isä on täällä.”* Joonas softly said as she babbled and made grabby hands towards him. He took her out of the crib and carried her to your shared bed. What followed were more cuddles and Joonas’s weekend stories (at least the few “child-appropriate” ones, since Sohvi was present and you know kids are like sponges). He recounted how Olli lost his bass, which made you laugh but also made you both wonder if he still was the best choice for being Sohvi's godfather.
After lunch, Joonas received an email from their photographer with a bunch of videos of the concert, so naturally he had to show them to both of you. He set up his computer in front of the sofa, where you were sitting with Sohvi in your lap, and played the videos. Whenever Joonas was on scene, you’d point at the screen and say, “look Sohvi, that’s daddy right there,” and Joonas’s heart would melt. Sohvi even started to do little jumps and you could swear she was trying to mimic Joonas’s movements he did to hype up the crowd before Dark Side was played. Joonas was so delighted by the scene he took out his phone and started filming the whole situation.
“Look at her, a proper heir of the Porko dynasty.” Joonas joked, though you knew in reality, he was half-serious and wondered how much time would pass until she got any kind of instrument in her hands, either a present from Joonas or from any of her uncles.
But none of you were prepared to hear your baby saying her first word when Joonas’s solo came up: “isä.” She said “daddy” in her father’s native Finnish. Both you and Joonas froze and looked at each other with teary eyes as you both processed the moment. Joonas interrupted in cheers as he picked her up and kissed her cheek, his blonde curly hair getting in her face and making her laugh. You quickly grabbed Joonas’s phone from his hand, since it almost flew away as he spun Sohvi around and kept recording the tender moment.
"I have to tell the boys. They were sure her first word was going to be Porko. Joel even bet on it."
"Oh that explains their insistence on saying Porko even though you weren’t in the room but Sohvi was…”
*Isä on täällä = Daddy's here (according to google translator, so @ Finns feel free to correct me pls)
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