#be diligent

[isahowdy]

this moment from work has lasted in my head for months and i think its finally time to draw it out

[xcellmateo]

"When you manifest anything, you FEEL it. Don't give up in the process. Birth it!".... Xcell Mateo- Lifestyle Coach

[toughbunnyforever]

this is kinda stupid but i googled heart monitors for two seconds and came to a conclusion

[yeah-thats-probably-it]

Hot take maybe but I think Bertie would be FAR more likely to survive the first two months of Dracula than Jeeves would be. Bertie has a healthy sense of self-preservation. Jeeves consistently underestimates how dangerous a situation might get (Steeple Bumpleigh, the club book) because he’s overconfident about his level of control over any given situation. He'd handle Dracula masterfully if they faced off in England, but on Dracula's home turf? Much more doubtful.

I realize this might be a tough sell, so I will explain further (or it's not a tough sell, and I'm going to explain further because I want to). (criteria taken from @canyourfavesurvivecastledracula) Without further ado.

Would Jeeves and Wooster survive Castle Dracula?

Jeeves

Jeeves' survival will depend on how long Dracula finds him more entertaining than irritating. On that basis, I don't think he's long for this world. On the one hand, he has a huge wealth of knowledge about English society and culture that he can recite perfectly from memory. That should buy him at least a little time with noted teaboo Dracula.

On the other hand, he would be absolutely no fun as a vampire plaything. Jeeves cannot be got. Sneaking up on him while he's shaving will yield zero reaction (though that's at least good for his short-term survival--given that, although he DID take the crucifix from the old woman out of politeness, he certainly isn't going to wear it. The rules of fashion don't go out the window just because you're in a spooky castle). Then, although managing the whims of rich jerks is not an insignificant part of a valet's job, Jeeves usually does this by bending his employers to his will. Dracula is not the sort of employer this will work on. It'll just add insult to injury when on top of being impossible to scare, NOW Jeeves is telling Dracula that his favorite cloak is several centuries out of fashion and he's not allowed to wear it anymore.

Jeeves will 100% go exploring in the areas he was told not to go-- though to be fair, he MIGHT actually get away with this, what with his superpower of appearing in rooms without being seen or heard. Said superpower might save him from the brides as well (though this is by no means guaranteed). Since I find it doubtful that Dracula would come to rescue his annoying ass, not being noticed is his best defense.

There are a couple other things working in Jeeves's favor; the question is just whether they'll be enough to save him.

He DOES know shorthand, and could try to send coded letters. He might even have the foresight to squirrel away some extra stationary where Dracula can't find it. But could he get them posted? Would it even do him any good?

He certainly has enough cultural literacy to figure out what his new boss is pretty quickly. If he didn't chuck the crucifix out the carriage window, he might start carrying it around in his pocket.

Psychology of the individual, sure, but the individual in question is a 400-year-old vampire who lives in an isolated castle in a foreign country and is regarded as a terrifying mythological figure in the surrounding villages. Jeeves has never come up against anything this alien before, he's cut off from his normal resources, and opportunities to play people against each other are limited.

He probably has enough upper body strength from all that shrimping and fishing to climb the wall, so he COULD escape if he wanted to, if he survived long enough. It's just, again, that overconfidence, and also Dracula has a vast library full of rare old books that are entirely at his disposal. He's keeping his eyes and ears alert for potential escape strategies, of course, but I don't see him being as desperate to get out as Jonathan was.

There are just a lot of "depends on"s here, and I'm not convinced that luck would shake out in Jeeves's favor, all things considered.

Bertie

Bertie is so perfect for the job of Castle Dracula Prisoner it's like it was made for him. Think about it. Being held against his will in big manor houses comes more naturally to him than breathing. He's afraid of things that are scary. A lifetime of dealing with Aunt Agatha has made him the world's preeminent expert in "curl[ing] up in a ball in the hope that a meek subservience [will] enable [him] to get off lightly." He will NEVER go exploring in places he's been warned away from if nobody is forcing him to (Rev. Aubrey Upjohn's office notwithstanding. There were biscuits in there). He's both fun to talk to and easy to toy with (and extremely English). A+ prisoner. Dracula adores him.

In my opinion, Bertie is at Castle Dracula either because Aunt Agatha got some wires seriously crossed and thinks he’s going to meet an eligible potential bride (I mean, there are certainly brides there), or because Dracula has something Aunt Dahlia wants him to steal (far less likely, given that one of Dracula’s THINGS is famously not owning anything silver). Either way, he's shown himself entirely willing and able to escape down drainpipes if a sitch gets too scaly.

He DOES take the crucifix, and DOES wear it (which is what will save him during the shaving scene, because you KNOW he's going to jump a foot and cut himself like the dickens). He's read enough supernatural goosefleshers to be genre savvy about terrified old women cryptically pushing crucifixes into one's hands. I also think his sunny disposish endeared him to the villagers, and they were particularly vehement about urging him not to go. He doesn't speak German or Romanian, but he's empathetic enough to recognize Pure Terror. So by the time he actually gets to the castle, his imagination is already running wild and he's plenty aware that he is in imminent danger.

I think the biggest risk to Bertie will be the brides; whether or not he's susceptible to trances, if he thinks they're trying to marry him, it's against the code of the Woosters to turn them down. But that only becomes an issue if he comes face to face with them, which, luckily, I think is unlikely on account of the aforementioned "won't go exploring" (and if he did, Dracula would definitely rescue him).

I'm inclined to say due to his drainpipe-escape habits that he WOULD be able to climb the wall and MAY attempt to sneak into Dracula's room to look for the keys if his desperation grows to outweigh his fear. Whether he does or not, though, he does NOT have the stomach to attempt shovel murder, and therefore won't get magic brain fever, and may very well simply walk out the front doors when the people come to take the boxes away. OR he climbs his way out like Jonathan did. Either way.

When Bertie tells this story at the Drones later, Tuppy will say that no doubt it's been greatly exaggerated and all that probably happened was that he spent a couple months in an oldish house entertaining a weird loner.

[pjs-everyday]

it's not too late for a summer beach episode, is it? 🥲

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Good Morning, World.

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[lokh]

new trend i think we should do: cooking with senshi

[wuntrum]

fan poster for the movie strange darling :)

[nekoning]

The queen had always liked Feng Xin

bonus xianle trio silly under the cut:

[dryya-doesnt]

It’s been a while waxwitch nation 🙏🙏🙏

I’m still overtaken by the waxwitch illness even after being away from this game for over a month now 💔💔

[canisalbus]

Oh my gosh, I can totally see Machete with a small cactus. I feel like if he had one it would be very dear to him and probably the most colorful thing he owns.

[gojoest]

you wonder why your cunt is often soaked with his cum when you wake up in the mornings—parts of it already leaked out, smeared and sticky between the inner of your thighs. you would know if your husband satoru fucked you in your sleep, you would’ve felt it, he is that big. but the truth is, as you soon find out, that he has a secret little thing, a morning ritual if you will, regarding that achy hardness in his boxers upon waking up he likes to involve you in, bc otherwise the relief is not that sweet. so, he strokes himself when you sleep still, his head slightly dipped in your cunt—holding back, but barely, from thrusting deep inside you—as he carefully works the load in his balls out, and inside you….why would he waste it after all when you’re right there beside him

[tanglepelt]

Dc x dp idea 114

Jack and Maddie figure out the truth. They can’t possibly hurt there boy. Even if they knew he was just a spook with pretend emotions.

So they inform the Giw.

The GIW waits for no one. In the middle of the school day they arrive at the highschool. Now when i was in highschool we had reinforced doors and they remained locked the entire school day. They had to buzz you in and out.

So the Giw arrive banging on the door ordering the arrest of Danny Fenton aka Phantom.

Turns out the staff and students of Casper high are ride and die. They all had weapons on them. They literally get attacked multiple times in a day.

This turns into a huge stand off.

Casper high protects there own. Dash and Paulina absolutely not letting Danny out of thier sights. No way. He’s in danger! Sam and tucker weren’t even in school that day. Jazz was pulled early.

No one os getting through to them. Jocks just throwing balls and weapons at the Giw from the roof. Paulina trying to disguise Danny but his ecto signature prevents that.

They have the whole school surrounded with anti-ecto weaponry so Danny can’t even sneak away.

Just the school protecting and hiding Danny. All until the JL get involved.

Government reached out to them as there is clearly a mind control or hostage situation happening. It had been 4 days. Something was clearly possessing them. Why else would the school be hiding the ghost boy?

[randanopterix]

Company issued motorbike

[cryptvokeeper]

Also idk maybe it was too subtle but. when oppenheimers wife takes him by the shoulders and says, “stop trying to make people pity you for the sins you committed” like. I just kind of figured that was a pretty explicit indictment of his actions and makes me struggle to take the “Oppenheimer is just a movie about a sad white mans feelings” arguments in good faith.

[proudsnackeezowner]

What do yall mean #phan #< for the bit??? BIT?? Guys this is our culture, our history, our legacy. Reject modernity embrace tradition and what not. You're a phannie, own up, tag phan without remorse or shame 🗣