#because he's literally a thousand times more interesting than anyone

[theromanticrationalist]

Sheldon: *laughing to himself* "I wish you can all be inside my head! The conversation is sparkling!" The guys: . . . Sheldon: "Fine! I'll tell you! A lichen is an organism made up of two separate species, fungi and algae. If you could merge with another species, which species would you pick and why? Hint: there is a right answer. None of you will get it." Raj: "Okay, I'd pick swan because the resulting hybrid would have the advanced industrial civilization of a human and the long graceful neck I've always dreamed of having!" Sheldon: "Wrong. The best organism for human beings to merge with is the lichen itself. That way you'd be human, fungus, and algae. Triple threat! Like three-bean salad." Leonard: "Give me one circumstance that would be useful." Sheldon: "Alright, picture this. A beautiful outdoor concert. Now, as a human, I appreciate Beethoven, as a fungus I have a terrific view growing out of a towering maple tree, and no thank you expensive concessions because as an algae, I'll just snack on this sunlight." Raj: "He got us again." Leonard: "No, he didn't." Raj: "Anyway, if its okay with you we should talk about Howard's bachelor party." Sheldon: "Well, seems bit of a let down after our lichen conversation, but what would you know, your half-swan." The Big Bang Theory 5x22 The Stag Convergence

[hazbin-writings-and-musings]

Lucifer Morningstar x Reader Smutty Headcanons

I promised on this LM x Reader post things would get spicy soon, so here we are, coming so far from my first post! Just the first of probably many more smutty Lucifer posts, because we all know this man fucks and we all want a piece.

Warnings: SMUT

- This man legitimately loves everything about eating pussy. He loves performing it, he loves bragging about how well he performs it, he loves giving tips because he believes in respecting the craft, and he loves putting down anyone too entitled to provide what he sees as this most enjoyable of services for one's partner. You don't even have to ask him to go down on you, it'll be one of the first things he offers, and he'll regularly ask if you're interested in letting off a little steam. Having the ability to extend and shapeshift his tongue into having an opposable forked tip makes him capable of techniques beyond your wildest fantasies, and whether you like to receive from above or below, he's equally down to have you seated on his face or laying back to enjoy yourself.

- He's not poorly or overly endowed for a man of his size, but he's also quite literally the one who originally proved that size doesn't matter in the slightest, and he's had thousands of years to perfect those original techniques. From position to tempo, he's mastered everything he needs to hit the G-spot with impeccable accuracy, and his hands will be quite busy seeking out where you most enjoy attention as he rides you with the power and virility of an untamed stallion. All this combined results in a mind blowing time for you, every time, and he's got the stamina to answer all of your repeated requests for another round.

- Nevermind the magic he can work with his tongue or his dick, the King of Hell is also a wizard with his fingers. He's even got a carpal tunnel roller just to keep his dexterity in top shape for when his skills are needed. Finding your clit is effortless for him, and he'll show it all the love he thinks you deserve, responding eagerly to your feedback in the moment and putting his mouth to use on your neck as he does so. Whether you want him inside, outside or both at the same time, he's happy to provide, and he'll gladly push his wrists to the limit if it leaves you properly satisfied.

- If you offer to be the one servicing him, he'll happily accept, and you'll quickly find his mannerisms shift quite considerably when he's on the receiving end. He starts out confident, offering banter to match your own, but as soon as your mouth gets to work, his demeanor changes. A grin becomes an open mouthed moan, his hands tenderly take hold of you to ground himself, and witty quips turn to soft and needy sighs. The more heated things get, the more he loses himself, but it's a great way for you to gauge how well you're performing. Growls and an appearance of his horns are a sign he's really having a good time, especially considering he's always got steam to blow off. Particularly rough days will result in him losing all control by climax; fully extended wings and horns, an unfurled tail he wraps about you, hair disheveled and clinging to a fine layer of sweat, and more than a few reality bending bursts of power surging around the both of you. It's his favorite way to end the day on a good note. He'll pull his fingers from your hair as he breathlessly apologizes for the show, but the both of you know watching him go feral is part of the fun.

- The afterglow is peak cuddle time for him, and he'll be in no hurry to get dressed if there's somewhere either of you needs to be, so more than a few of his duties will end up delayed thanks to post-coital bliss. All six wings will seek you out for a fluffy embrace, and if the two of you are at all winded, the otherworldly softness of Archangel feathers might make staying awake quite impossible. Should you have some energy to spare though, he'll want to actively enjoy the snuggle. Hearing you breathe, feeling his skin against yours, and engaging in pillow talk just make him the happiest little guy. Such moments really allow him to let his guard down, and you might hear him speak with a softness and hopefulness that rarely leaves the bedroom, but he's just as interested in listening as he is in talking. Don't be too surprised if he drifts off with his head in your boobs though.

[ghostbsuter]

"What exactly are halfas?" Constantine asks, cigarette lit and leaning against the table.

They were in the justice league, having attended a meeting previously and now just lazed around.

Batman loses focus on his laptop screen and openly looks at the two, interested.

Green Lantern, Hal, jerks up at the question, looking between everyone still in the room and trying (and failing) to seem uninterested.

Zatara is glaring daggers at Constantine's back, eyes narrowed.

While flash had no context, having just arrived back with his food to sit with the rest, he appropriately tenses as well, from just one glance around the room.

Superman and Wonder woman aren't different from batman, not as discreet as some are trying to be and just staring at the two.

Slightly amused, Danny decided to entertain the question.

"Unlike ghosts and the undead, halfas are created and not born." He explains, looking at the man when he writes it down.

Who knew the infinity realm were this closed off that John Constantine had to get information from the source itself just to keep updated?

"Care to elaborate?"

Clicking his tongue, he does so.

"Halfas get created during extreme circumstances, it has to be right place, right time and correct amount of ectoplasm." Danny catches the lollipop that Batman throws at him, sending the bat a quick smile.

"Not everyone can become a halfa, our race is a rarity amongst the dead."Constantine raises a brow, pursing his lips. "There are only 3 of you right? Is that a normal amount in the realms?"

Another click. "No, thousands of years ago, when our kind reached its peak of over hundreds of people, Pariah Dark happened."

He briefly shares a glance with Martian Manhunter, he wonders if anyone here sent out a message of phantom story time? Why were they all lounging around?

"It was genocide. He killed off an entire species just because he felt threatened." He shrugs.

Constantine jolts, eyes clear as if he'd just connected the dots.

"So his downfall wasn't only because of rights of conquest but— the reason no one joined nor fought between you and the old King was because it was a revenge kill."

Danny ponders the words over, nodding. Yeah that sounds right.

"Many aren't surprised that Pariah Dark went berserk. It was kind of predictable, considering his soul was brought to the Infinity Realms after he'd died in the Phantom Zone as you know it."

Hal straightens up, Batman tenses and Diana leans forward.

"This previous King of yours– he was a past prisoner of Aethyr's Mind?"

The halfa nods, uncertain now that he'd stumbled upon unknown territory.

"Yes, the Phantom Zone and the Infinity Realms are sister spaces. Were you not aware?"

They were not, he quickly finds out.

Fumbling with his words, mind working overdrive as he sorts through information, he speaks again. "They are the two sides of the same coin, Phantom Zone being non-habitable while the Ghost Zone is filled with unalive."

He briefly struggles with his words, genuinely taken off guard with the lack of knowledge.

"Aethyr isn't just a being, but someone who is connected to the realm itself. Its similar to my position as King of the ghost zone." He summons his crown of ice to simple gesture.

"Besides! Phantom Zone, Zero Zone? Anti-infinite? That's literally the opposite of the Ghost Zone, the Infinite Realms!" he exclaims, throwing his hands up.

"Could you tell us more of your realm?" Superman asks, voice gentle and non threatening. "Some of us have been in the Phantom Zone, so hearing that there is a place being the complete opposite?"

The halfa nods in understanding. "Sure, why not?"

Three simple words yet everyone feels the trust put on them with such information.

"The entire realm is an ever shifting space, we categorise eith the sectors of each afterlife. From the Greeks to the Yetis and different eras."

—

(The tale of his realm lasts longer than expected, it is only when Hal started to get ready to leave does Danny address a certain area in his zone.

"The... Emerald Space is also a sector of the Infinity realm. The sector itself is formed in a sphere like form, we aren't sure what's inside since the fallen lanterns keep to themselves rather."

Hal froze, eyes catching the ghosts, and looked away again. He'd tell OA of this, but now he was going home.

Danny watched him leave and declared it down for now, free for more question the next time and left just as fast.

At least Constantine and Zatara can update their books now.)

[isa-ghost]

Do you have any headcanons as far as Philza and BBHs' relationship? I've enjoyed thinking about that because I think it's one of the few relationships on Philza's side that's actually a bit more complicated? But also Philza saying that BBH wouldn't lie is the funniest thing ever.

Or if no headcanons about Philza and BBH specifically what about Philza, Bad, and Cellbit as a trio in charge of the order because I really loved that

OOOH this is gonna be an interesting challenge because I don't watch a lot of Bad :0!

qPhil headcanons masterlist

Obligatory they're both thousands of years old mention. There's some things they can talk about and relate on that no one else on the island can. MAYBE Foolish, but Foolish tends to just focus on the present and vibe. Phil and Bad though, in the right conditions, they could and will have deep conversations about the past and their experiences.

On that note holy fucking shit these two would be terrifying teamed up together. If the Feds ever do something harmful or permanent to the eggs, god help them when these two decide they're armed enough and hatch a plan. They'll rain hell on the entire island and then some. And every other parent will be more than willing to join them. Do Not Piss Off The Immortal Murder Dads.

Phil could tell clearly that Bad is part demon. Finding out he was part reaper was a surprise. Honestly with how much of a lil trickster Bad is, Phil is surprised he isn't part Fae or something.

Phil takes one look at how Bad goes "no idea what you're talking about, nothing happened :D" about stuff like him Literally Dying and is like [uncanny Mr Incredible] "at least I'm not that bad." Phil just (very poorly) hides things and says he's fine. He doesn't straight up deny anything happened (and couldn't convincingly act like nothing is wrong the way Bad can if he tried)

Missa is a reaper. Bad is a reaper. Phil wants to see them talk about reaper things together. Or see them both in action. He himself can also carry small conversations about it since he's learned so much through osmosis :D

Actually that's kinda why Phil feared Bad so much during Purgatory. That was him in action. And he never wants to be on an opposing side of it again.

He doesn't resent Bad for Purgatory btw he just jokes like it sometimes. Same as with Tubbo (or anyone else for that matter), he blames the Watcher for trying to destroy their friendships.

Has straight up looked Bad in the eyes like "are you aware you are raising the most terrifying egg. Are you." He genuinely thinks if Dapper wanted to, he could kill Phil in his sleep. Every time he sees Dapper, he's learned something new and insane.

Tbh Phil sometimes envies how full of whimsy Bad is. He's seen infinitely more horrors than Phil for sure, yet he always ironically seems like a little ball of sunshine despite being a literal shadow lookin demon. What The Fuck is this man's secret to staying so silly.

Phil is endlessly fascinated by the extent to which Bad can come up with more and new protections for the eggs. He thinks of stuff not even remotely on Phil's radar. See, Phil's a safety expert as a survivalist, but most of his skills involve using what's around you and your wits, because survival is largely about relying only on yourself because you rarely have any other choice. Bad on the other hand will not hesitate to seek out new tech, other people, or tinker and experiment until he discovers new ways to use anything and everything he can get his hands on. Phil admires how intuitive he is.

Also Bad is really good at making bases and Phil enjoys seeing how balanced the aesthetics and practical parts are. Bad can make something look cozy and lavish as hell while also putting like a billion farms and gadgets into it.

I wonder how a conversation about possession would go. :) Surely Bad has some insight on it as a demon?

Something about how the two of them have arguably the most horrific egg death nightmares. I don't know where to go with this but goddamn would Crows and Ghosties be feasting.

Actually wait shut up, I just realized something kinda cute. In the same way Phil can talk to birds (particularly crows ofc), Bad can talk to the dead/undead (particularly ghosts). Imagine the sillies that could come out of that. It's said that animals can see the dead, what if Phil's murder conspires with the ghosts that follow Bad around ;D

The moment Phil would use his wings if they were healed, Bad would clock that he's the Angel of Death. I'm not sure he saw Phil flying during Purgatory, but if he did, he knows. And that would lead to many interesting conversations. :)

[ezshellshocked]

⚡︎ ┊ TMNT : Finalized designs & Headcannons.

⚡︎ ┊ Finished my official designs, now I can make comics and such without them looking different every time. !! HEADCANNONS BELOW IMAGE, FOR ANYONE INTERESTED.

⚡︎ ┊ HEADCANNONS.

Leonardo

Cannot be sneaked up on (Will catch whoever tries)

Lots of night terrors

Light sleeper

Loves bubblegum

Superiority complex

Talks to himself out loud

Really good at lying (Best liar in the family)

Always smells good

Very overprotective (especially over Mikey bc he's the youngest)

Annoying older brother vibes

Argues with Raph the most

Sleeps with one eye open (literally)

Allergic to dogs

Only turtle who CAN cook

Can't watch horror films (they freak him out)

"IDC" Thinks about it for hours

"I'm not scared!" Freaks out

Hates bugs

Raphael

LOVES Halloween. (Has decorations all over his room)

Heavy sleeper

Snores but says he doesn't

Mr.Sarcastic

Picks on Don the most

Swears in nearly every sentence

Metalhead

Bedroom? No, Mancave. (Barely leaves his room)

Talented artist

Plays the bass guitar

JUGALLO RAPH REAL!!

Hates everything and everyone.

Edgy middle child attitude

"IDGAF!!" Starts crying

Likes Mikey more bc he can playfight rough with him.

True crime >>>

Horror movies >>>

Works out to calm himself down

Only shows his "cool" art to his brothers, keeps everything else hidden

Always looks angry no matter what

Can't control his tone of voice (Speaks really loudly, and aggressively)

Hates being told what to do

Deathly terrified of roaches

Missing a tooth (From a fight with leo)

Donatello

Very very VERY tired

Mr.Fix-it

Germaphobe

Neat-freak

Really picky with food

Won't eat spaghetti or most noodles bc it reminds him of worms

Hates wearing most clothes because they make him feel trapped

Gets hiccups when nervous

Doesn't drink coffee, though likes energy drinks

Must double check everything a billion times

Throws a fit when someone messes with his plans, or things

Swears as much as Raph

RARELY in his room, mostly in his lab.

Hates the smell of dust, sage, and greasy food

Likes collecting pens

MOOD SWING KING!!

Paranoid all the time

Insomniac

Almost always accidentally falls asleep in his lab.

Sticky notes, sticky notes, sticky notes

Can only draw mechs and vehicles, cant draw anything else

" We're poor as dirt " Has thousands of dollars hidden in his room.

Has to wear glasses but doesn't around his brothers (they pick on him :( )

Likes psychological horror better than visual horror.

Slouch king

yells a LOT

Listens to techno music when making inventions

#1 oingo boingo fan

Has slight bucked teeth

Speaks with a lisp

Michelangelo

Spoiled younger brother vibes

Loves video games

A LITERAL GOD AT DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION

Hates being left alone, or away from his brothers for long periods of time

ALWAYS asking Donatello for money (usually a yes)

LOVES candy (especially sour)

Borrows April's camcord to take stupid videos

Cracks every bone in his body when nervous

"The vibes are off right now…"

" Dudezz!! " " Chill out brozz " type of guy

Wears braces!

Always doing stupid shit

PRANK LORD

#ILOVEBEINGATURTLE!!!!

Sings in the shower

Puts on whole concerts for no reasons

Plays the drums

LOVES play fighting with Raph

Likes cooking, but cant do it good.

"CAN WE KEEP IT!!"

"I licked it, it's mine"

Steals from everyone, thinks its funny

Hides Donnie's tools for fun

Talks too fast

[saintsenara]

I need your thoughts on aunt petunia/rita skeeter

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

and i think... hot. entirely on "incredibly niche moments in british pop-culture" grounds...

by which i mean, when i try to imagine what rita looks like, she always takes a form vaguely similar to a journalist named samantha brick, who went viral in 2012 when she published an article in the daily mail entitled why do women hate me for being beautiful?

brick's article was typical, boring misogyny - and so was the response to it, which all centred on the idea that she didn't actually have any right to call herself attractive - but the relevant point here is that i can guarantee that petunia hate-read it literally a thousand times, that she told anyone who'd listen that she thought brick was a delusional tart who should stay away from other people's husbands [especially when they're fine british beef, like vernon], and that she was secretly quite jealous of brick for proclaiming loudly that she thinks herself beautiful.

the way that jkr uses physical appearance - and, especially, the way that women we aren't supposed to like are described either as fat or as unfemininely thin - has always annoyed me [even though i recognise it's a trope borrowed from many of the children's literature influences upon the series].

when it comes to petunia, so much of her physical description is intended to hint at her villainy. that she's unfemininely tall and thin, that she has a harsh, slightly equine appearance serves as a visual metaphor for her lack of the feminine characteristics the series considers admirable - she's cold, unnurturing, brittle, sterile, nosy, obsessed with how she's perceived, performative, cowardly, and so on. lily - with whom she's always contrasted - is a good woman - the ultimate mother - because she's real. and she's also - as the text tells us on several occasions - beautiful.

but if one wants to be more sympathetic, petunia's brittleness can be read instead as fragility. after all, she's a woman who - by the time she's twenty-four at most - is caring for two toddlers [one more than she was expecting], has lost her parents and sister, appears to be at home all day without much social support, is hyper-focused on not embarrassing a husband who appears to be quite a few years older than her by fucking up the class performance he expects but she's not completely familiar with... the list goes on.

what this must do to petunia's understanding of her own embodiment is really interesting to me. the entirety of the person she presents to the world is a fiction - she's a working-class girl with a sister who was a witch, who lives behind a thoroughly mundane and middle-class mask. this concealment will have an impact on how she understands herself as a physical creature - the petunia dursley she's created will not sweat or cry or shit or have body hair or devour or laugh until she can't stand or take or bleed or want or fuck.

and so, when she's alone and the mask comes off, can she think that the real woman who lurks underneath - whose body does all of these things she tries to hide - is beautiful?

i imagine petunia as being prone to a sort of obsessive, corrosive jealousy in her attitude towards women who are more defiant of social convention - especially women who reject the expectation that they will be meek, humble, self-deprecating, and demure.

which brings us onto...

rita skeeter is another character whose physical description in the text is something i think it's important to unpick. she's an example of the second technique which jkr uses when describing women the narrative doesn't wish us to be sympathetic to - that their gender expression has an exaggerated, hyper-feminine aesthetic.

jkr clearly thinks that this aesthetic is unnatural - in that it only belongs to women who have to play up a pantomime of femininity because they are improperly feminine in any "innate" way. dolores umbridge's girlish, pastel looks, for example, are horrifying because the person beneath them is sociopathic in her cruelty to children.

with rita, i am always struck - especially given the turn jkr has taken in recent years - that she is described in goblet of fire as someone with a hyper-feminine aesthetic which fails [in the text's eyes] to mask that she is physically unfeminine.

she is described as having "hair ... set in elaborate and curiously rigid curls that contrasted oddly with her heavy-jawed face", and "thick fingers [which] ended in two-inch nails, painted crimson", and "large, mannish hands", and she's caked in make-up, and she likes her accessories with a slightly tacky vibe.

she's described - in short - in ways which are intended to make her seem ridiculous [cheap, brassy, mutton-dressed-as-lamb] within the confines of how the text [and the world] thinks cisgender women should properly perform femininity.

but she's also described in ways which suggest that we're supposed to think that she looks like someone who is not a cisgender woman trying - and failing - to "pass". the text is of the tedious opinion that we should think less of her because of this.

but fuck that!

what i like about rita is the fact that she takes this treatment by the text and... doesn't give a shit about it. she's loud and eye-catching and caustic and rude and grasping and a complete hack. what you see with her is what you get - nobody thinks she's a good or impartial journalist, including her, and she simply doesn't care! and she thinks she looks hot as hell while doing it. after all, she has her quill describe her as an "attractive blonde". harry thinks that's an offensive suggestion - but she doesn't have to.

do i think rita is a straightforwardly admirable person? no. do i think that she doesn't mask and conceal her insecurities from the world? also no.

but i think she has that self-belief which petunia would pretend she thought was disgusting but which she secretly envied rita for. and i think this - someone like petunia, repressed and concealed, meeting someone who has no shame in immoderation and who gives them permission to exist greedily - is a trope which always hits.

do i think it would last? no. i think it's a wild fling and then they go their separate ways - and i also think, as i know i say ad nauseam, that this matters. the harry potter series thinks of love as something which endures for years in solemn silence, which sacrifices and which suffers.

but sometimes love is a week of getting your nails done, sunning yourself in a leopard-print thong bikini, being trashy and immodest and demanding, and eating ice-cream out of the navel of a blonde who doesn't give a fuck what people say about her. nothing more, nothing less.

good for them.

[worlds-oldest-teenager]

Why I think Apollo is the golden child and not the scapegoat.

To me both Apollo and Athena are Zeus's golden children.

At first it makes sense that Apollo would be the scapegoat of the family cause of how disproportionate the punishment is when most of his family (Athena & Ares) Have done much worse. The way Apollo narrates as well makes him seem like he gets the blame for everything.

But if we really get into the head honcho himself's brain, the punishment is fitting for the crime Apollo's committed. In his mind Ares and Athena's crimes are excusable. Ares is violent, bloodthirsty and war bringing and he's given up on that child ages ago. (I'd argue that Ares is the real scapegoat of the family)

Athena is interesting. She's very clearly at fault for this war even more so than Apollo. So why doesn't she get punished at all?

I think the reason he comes down so hard on Apollo and not on Athena is cause of their motivations. Athena causing the schism over some statues was because of her righteous anger at the Romans for demoting her to a craft goddess. It was a decision she made millennia ago that any other god, at least in Zeus's opinion, would have also made. They literally stole her and made her nothing which is something no god takes lightly.

Apollo is a whole other story.

The reasons behind Apollo conspiring with Octavian are blurry but what we can acknowledge is that he at least promised to put him above Zeus which is complete high treason on Apollo's part for actually going along with it.

Hoping on Ares just invites disappointment. Athena's the golden child who's actions are perfectly acceptable in his twisted mind. But Apollo? Apollo should be the perfect son, and most of the time he is. He's got the most domains. He's won so many times that the very symbol of victory is one of his symbols.

Athena and Apollo's relationship, from the very little we've seen, also confirms this. They seem to have a deep mutual respect for each other and an understanding that comes from being in the exact same situation.  Apollo loves her enough to give her a nickname. Athena is (I think) the only god to almost stand up to Zeus when he blamed Apollo for the whole war. To me their dynamic doesn't really read as a golden child/ scapegoat dynamic but more like mutual golden children with one absolutely having the potential to kill their father. They're kind of ride or die but they would not die for each other lmao.

So I think Athena and Apollo share the same dysfunctional family role. It's just that sometimes Apollo goes a little astray yenno? He's learnt to sand down his rough edges since he was a godling but at least twice before, he's absolutely lost it and forced his father's hand. But it was nothing a little correction couldn't handle. Now he's back to being Zeus's perfect son and continues being so for thousands of years.

That's why him conspiring to overthrow Zeus is such a collosal betrayal. This level of anger and hurt doesn't make sense to me if Apollo is the scapegoat. It makes much more sense if he's Zeus's beloved son who he thought loved him as much as he did.

Even his confrontation with Apollo in blood of Olympus was blamey, sure, but it was also a bitterly disappointed kind of angry. I really feel like he was using the war to justify punishing Apollo so harshly for an affront against himself.  (Way to state the obvious).

Pjo Zeus just doesn't really seem to care about most of the problems anyone is facing  until there's real potential that it could turn deadly against himself. He has a prophecy of his son overthrowing him to think about. Golden child or not, nay especially if it's his golden child, they cannot ever think doing such a thing is acceptable or that they are capable of it.

And in that way the punishment kind of fits, right? Try to put yourself above the king of the gods? Get supremely humbled with the most embarrassing experience of your life fighting your nightmare of a nemesis who nearly killed you as a child.

Zeus and Apollo reuniting on Olympus after his trials cements my point. What is Zeus's confirmation that all is right and his son is back in his rightful place? Is it 'I apologize' or 'I love you ' ? No. It's, "You have done me proud ". Because this is who Apollo is meant to be. An object of pride that Zeus doesn't love so much as appreciate when the light from his trophy child reflects on himself.

[katasstrophy]

I feel like I've seen every Bluelock boy paired with a very cute, very bubbly, and chill gf/reader before, but I haven't seen any of them paired with a cool and competent or even bossier type. Are there any guys you think of liking that type??? Or maybe just deserve that type to be kept in line lmao 🤣

nonnie!! 😳 NONNIE UR BRAIN I’M GIVING IT A THOUSAND KISSES UR SOOO RIGHT FOR THIS!!! i guess it doesn’t really show with the fics i’ve uploaded so far – which is a damn shame, i should fix that – but i am absolutely all for readers who are just… out there, ya know? they’re prickly, or easy to anger, or sardonic as all hell, or way too clever for their own good or yes yes, bossy<3 i eat that shit UP like it’s my last meal. this is not to say i don’t enjoy sweet, bubbly readers (bc i do!) but the type you describe just… scratches a certain itch iykwim 👁️👁️

i think one of my first posts ever about blue lock on this blog (cw. mid writing LMAO) was exactly about this. obviously most of the blue lock guys are only extreme egoists when they’re playing soccer, but i do think that aspect of their lives will ultimately start to bleed into their personality as they grow up/go pro. so having someone who’s just like “yeah that’s great and all but if you won’t make it to date night i’ll leave your sorry ass” is just. so sexy to them like?? they haven’t gotten their ego knocked down a peg in a while so i think they’d be drawn to a partner like that askdhxnbz idk if i’m explaining this very well but as far as i’m concerned all blue lock boys deserve an unhinged reader lol 😤

THAT BEING SAID!!! >:))) i have a top three list of blue lock men who i, personally, would love to put in their place and encourage anyone out there to do so as well LOL

1. MICHAEL KAISER — this cocky motherfucker ugh need i say more 🙄 the urge to censor his name was real strong but i persevered still cannot believe i’m (sadly) attracted to this horrible, horrible man. he’s sooo insufferable and just so obsessed with himself like he unironically refers to himself as the emperor when i tell you there’s nothing i want more than to make this man beg on his knees i mean it – what a pretty sight that would be hm? <3 all his past lovers probably treated him like he was god’s greatest gift to women (HE IS NOT) – and by now he’s not only used to it but comes to expect it – so when he meets you and you’re like “mm you’re kind of a prick leave me alone thenk yew✨✨” he’s just. so scandalized LMFAO suddenly he’s the one chasing after you and vying for a shred of your attention oooohh yes that’s exactly what he deserves how it should be

2. ITOSHI SAE — listen he might be my precious babygirl now but i used to hate this mans guts like no other and that little resentment still lives on in my heart in the form of wanting this man’s downfall to be a woman like don’t tell me that’s not the hottest thing you’ve ever heard. he’s just so single-mindedly focused on soccer – japan’s treasure and what not – and thinks he can get away with being an asshole because of it but you place down your foot and tell him to cut the bullshit or you’ll find someone who treats you better (AMEN SISTER) and suddenly he’s grappling with the reality that shit he might just fall apart without you yes girl make him suffer

3. OLIVER AIKU — i couldn’t not include the resident fuckboy here mmmm the possibilities for him are endless and each one more delicious than the last. he might not be as insufferable as the others but he still thinks extremely highly of himself, especially when it comes to his way with the ladies. typical “oh no i don’t do relationships” kinda guy who can show you a good time for a night before dipping in the morning – and you just don’t want that. so you reject his advances, say you’re not interested and move on, but for some reason, oliver can’t. literally physically wounds his pride when he crawls back for a second chance but you don’t budge, still wary of him due to his past behavior unless he can show you otherwise. and the way he scrambles to prove himself as trustworthy to you? god tier groveling from a man YUMM

[justanotherlifeff]

Possession

[Some of ya’ll wanted an alternative ending to “Love is meaningless” and guess what? There you go. Is it happy? Hell no. I just like watching the world burn lol. There will be a 3rd part with actual smut cause now Im invested in this sooo yeahhh. But yeah, there are spoilers and Sukuna is an asshole cause he’s literally evil incarnate. I put the smut tag cause there are some mentions of sex, even if there isn’t any actual sexual description]

Love is meaningless to Sukuna precisely because he knew it. It was the epitome of weakness. How else could one describe the need to put someone else above themselves? To look for validation, praise, acceptance… those are concepts that the weak search for. The strong doesn’t ask others to bow down. The strong simply kills the ones who don’t. Not because of a fragile ego but because its fun to kill. Its fun to see these miserable humans with their ridiculous beliefs of righteousness crumble apart. He knew first hand the fickle and hypocritical nature of humans after all since he was the same once. Enlightenment to him was understanding that he needs to be above that wretched nature.

However, after a thousand years, he saw something that made him laugh at the absurdity of it. He is the king of curses, the evil incarnate, the most cruel thing to exist. And yet, reality’s idea of cruel jokes seemed to surpass the king of curses himself because there you were, going to the same Jujutsu School as the brat he was possessing, or atleast, it was your reincarnated form. How did this happen? He had some idea since you were pregnant with his child after all before you died. That child must have had immense cursed energy, which made this miracle possible a thousand years later. The timing was awfully convinient too, it almost made him wonder whether this was planned by someone to subdue his reincarnation.

It was foolish, he thought. Subduing him with some fickle idea of love? How laughable. He stopped being that person the day you died, and its not like this cheap copy even had those memories. This version of you had the same personality, the same looks, and yet, it wasn’t the same because this time, he was your enemy. Not that it mattered ofcourse. He still felt the need to own you. To have you all to himself. No, it wasn’t love. It was simply his extreme desire to take what was his. His obsession with taking everything he wants.

It did occur to him, to kill you just to spite on whoever thought it would be a funny idea to make fate play out this way. However, while he never regretted a single drop of blood that was on his hands, for some reason, deep within his twisted heart, he felt as if he would regret having your blood on his hand. Besides, you were more useful alive. He could have his fun taking you, making you remember that past whether you like it or not. No one takes away his belongings from him and he wasn’t losing you, his most precious possession, again. So he waited patiently.

He decided it would be best to not create suspicion on his obsession with you. It would be best to lull you into a false sense of security by feigning a lack of interest in you. That way, you wouldn’t stay away from Itadori, that way he can keep an eye on you, watch you through the brat’s eyes. He waited for over 1000 years, he could wait a few months more. It was difficult for him, as every time you smiled at Itadori, he wanted to kill the brat. How dare you smile at a lowly human like that? How dare you smile at anyone that wasn’t him? How dare you wear that promiscuous skirt, showing your beautiful legs to the world when it was all his alone? How dare you wear makeup to look beautiful for anyone that isn’t him? Your life didn’t belong to you after all. You were reincarnated because you beared his child back then. So how dare you pretend to have freedom when you were nothing more than a filthy human that he owns?

Sukuna is evil incarnate, but despite his many vices, he also had many qualities, patience being one of them. Despite his desire to take over Itadori’s body, bend you over and fuck the freedom out of you, he stayed calm, waiting for the perfect opportunity to take you for himself for good, without having sorcerers come after him to take you away. Would a sorcerer wish to save you if he made you a cursed spirit too? If he killed you, took your humanity from you, made you immortal and tied to him with the proper rituals, would they even want you back? Perhaps he should show you how little value you have to those jujutsu sorcerers. Perhaps, he should show you that he is the only one who sees your value, the only one who wouldn’t abandon you. No, its not out of love, ofcourse not. Its simply because he owns you, he convinced himself.

[crypticjackal13]

Hi can I request a macaque wukong and mk x sugar mommy reader

Like reader spoils them so much that she would do anything for them like for example if they want a game/food/anything they want she will get it for them but if she finds out that someone threatened them or hurt them she will literally grab her weapon and she will beat the bitch up or anyone that will hurt them

Also can you do them separately please

YOURE A GENIUS YES SPOIL THE MONKEYS /pos

Also I focused more on the money part bc it's just so cute to think about....like the three most approval/attention seeking characters in the show and you buy them stuff???? 100000/10 in my opinion

SWK - you…you actually love him…and you wanna buy him stuff?? And besides loving and caring for you back he doesn’t have to pay you back?? Or prove he’s really grateful?? He can hardly believe it and thinks that you’re a demon trying to mess with him. But nope, you just give him a kiss and bring him to one of the stores he’s shown interest in and tell him to find some nice clothes. Then after you’ll take him to dinner. It takes him a while to get used to it, but he loves the attention you give him. He develops a sense of style that’s more than the same few things he’s been wearing for thousands of years and honestly? He’s so handsome. He has a habit of constantly checking for reassurance that you honestly want to do this for him, because he can pay you back no problem!! A few weeks into being with you and his mood is super upbeat, but like genuinely instead of masking.

MK - huh??? What do you mean you’re alright with just spending absurd amounts of money on him??? He’s super flattered, he never turns you down, but he’s an anxious lad who has never heard of a sugar mommy before. So you take him wherever he wants—his favorite place to blow money with you is definitely the arcade—have fun, and then he thanks you a million times. He loves being with you, not just for the money(though it is a nice bonus), and I think he’d gain some confidence from knowing that there’s someone who loves him and doesn’t need any grand gestures from him to prove it. Him being himself is enough for you.

Macaque - look, it’s gonna take a lot of time for him to be comfortable calling you a friend, let alone his partner, let alone…this. You’ll have to start small with him so you don’t scare him off. Promise him you won’t hold this all against him some day, and that you’re honestly doing all this because you love him. He usually seems very confident, however once he realizes your intentions are good, he almost becomes shy. It’ll take some serious coaxing to get him to point out things that he likes so you can get them, but you love how flustered he gets when he tries clothes on and asks you what you think. I think his love language receiving would be gifts(since let’s face it when he used to be friends(or more?) with Wukong he was never empty-handed by the end of the day) but in terms of giving he probably likes physical touch or words of affirmation…expect a clingy monkey after every trip :)

[sorcerous-caress]

Aglaya and Artemy are so smitten with each other oh my god. A doomed romance neither of them expected to blossom amidst the war and plague.

How she desperately tried to protect Artemy at each corner and turn, only wanted the best for him and put in so much effort to understand the kin in such a short notice despite her busy schedule and death knocking on her door.

HE DOESN'T EVEN HESITATE BEFORE CALLING HER HIS WIFE WHEN THE LITERAL ARMY CORNERS THEM. Fleeing together and choosing their own path! Choosing their love over the town and all the people in it! In Artemy's view, that might as well have been their wedding vows.

She's such a powerful woman who instils fear into everyone she crosses. The infamous inquisitor who broke the mind of everyone she has called into questioning so far, who had the Bachelor thinking that she'll order his execution. Who had the kains shaking in terror, crumbling down the three old powerhouses of the town in a couple of days.

Mansplain Girlboss x Himbo Malewife fr fr

I always felt like their relationship progressed a little too fast in P2, but when I played P1 I completely understood why. it's expanded upon so much more and you get to see exactly how they slowly fall in love, how much their trust in each other multiples by the day.

How everyone around them can see it clearly.

MY WIFE <3333 M Y WIFE I AM IN HEAVEN.

There are just so many golden lines between these two. There are so many adorable moments of them being silly and weird, and so so in love like:

Aglaya makes her interest in Artemy as a person very clear. She recites us peotry upon first meeting him, saying he will learn the meaning in the future.

Yet she compares his mind to that of a poet later on.

Saying how much she respects him, how she incoperates a steppe term into a beautiful flirtatious line when she thinks it's time to say goodbye. When she thinks we won't return her feelings.

And yet despite her feelings burning with the intensity of a thousand suns, she never allows it to mix with her job, even telling him not to get roped into politics because he's on the path of priesthood while she acknowledges the manipulators she works for.

All to protect him, to protect you.

She is very sweet and thoughtful, calculated yet sincere in her feelings for Artemy. She never once acts like how others claim she would. She never walks anyone else's path of expectations.

All of her infatuation stems from the fact that Artemy answered her lifelong question so simply. Because he loved this town he grew up in and wanted to protect it.

Because he proved that having free-will makes very little difference in the grand nothingness of the universe. Even if other people interpret his actions or use it to benefit their schemes, Artemy will walk a path of his own making and follow his own heart to know what's right or wrong.

He showed her that she has always been free, not the puppet she thought she was. That constantly trying to spite greater forces isn't a way to live your life. Rather, actually living that life how you want is true freedom.

That finding your own happiness and looking out for the people you love is the best revenge you could deliver.

Even if everyone was a puppet and their entire reality has been nothing but a game, even then it wouldn't make a single difference to Artemy.

Because his love was real, his feelings were real enough. Puppet or not, he loved his father. He loves this town, which nursed him young. And he will deliver that love back when it's in need, when the kids he swore to protect are in danger.

And yet, I have a theory. I think it's the player she is in love with, too, rather than just Artemy.

It's because technically, only the player has free will. Only the player gets to escape the narrative.

Only the player is the full fledged human being that she fell in love with.

But I might be wrong, I need to play the Bachelor's route to confirm this, I've only done the Haruspex in P1 and P2 so far.

So far she is indifferent towards him, at least in Artemy's route, she views the Bachelor as a useful tool, a means to an end. Maybe it changes in his route and she falls for the player again? or maybe it's exclusive to Artemy because while she likes the player, she still loves Artemy himself on his own, even without the free will.

Or maybe you need a combination of both to results in Aglaya taking notice of you. The Bachelor is bound to Maria, who's trying to become Nina, and Aglaya loathes the kains and seeks revenge against them.

While Artemy walks free, he isn't bound to anyone she despies. Not to mention how fascinated she is by Steppe culture and the natural miracles, how excited she is when she finds the town is alive, how much invested she is in Artemy fullfilling his father's inheritance.

UPDATE: The game confirms Aglay is in love with Artemy and not the player, even without the free will. You can talk to her as the player at the end of the game, and she still refuses you and asks for the haruspex back instead. Screenshots here.

I wish there was a timelife where she lives. It seems that it doesn't matter what you do, she will always perish.

A doomed romance, she finally found something in this life worth caring about, someone worth calling her own.

And just when you think you've outsmarted the system and escaped hades, the game steals her away from you and humilates you by making you walk all the way back.

"You really thought it would be this easy?"

"You should've seen this coming"

"What did you ever expect? a happily ever after?"

"That's what you get for attempting to ruin the play, now get back inside."

So you reload an earlier savefile with a bitter taste in your mouth.

You play by their rules this time around.

Do whatever you can to appease the powers that be, keep showing up every day to deliver the best possible performance.

Willingly let yourself become a puppet and never go against the strings pulling you along.

The most painful part, however, is having to reject Aglayas' proposal to run together.

She doesn't understand. She is desperate trying to get you to see her point of view, like you effortlessly did so many times before.

She is confused, why are you suddenly rejecting her ideas, why did your trust in her vanish overnight? Did she do something wrong? Please listen to her. She loves you and wants to live with you.

Please just listen, I'm not lying i swear.

Please come with me.

I love you.

And I can't go on without you.

You have to sit there and deny her request, time after time after time, each more painful than the last. She explains herself, but you won't listen. You can't listen.

Because if you listen, she will die.

You know the future. You're trying to protect her like she has protected you so much before. She can't understand, so she gets hurt. You're whispering sorry to a screen like a fool.

...

..

.

She still dies.

You've hurt her for nothing. She loved you, and in her final moments, you broke her heart.

For nothing.

All of your work and effort, your dignity and pride reduced to mud in which you've rolled through to appease two stupid kids from taking your wife away from you.

Because she still fucking dies the next day.

To rub salt into the wound, her demise is off-screen this time. Like one of the nameless npcs in the number counter of deaths we see at the start of each day.

One of them was Aglaya. Reduced to just a number on a counter, like the thousands before her.

Doomed if you do.

Doomed if you don't.

Used and discarded like an old toy.

A mother's beloved childhood doll.

Was worthy of love afterall.

[itsyagurlchip]

WAIT I SENT THE ASK TOO EARLYA AUWHAUDHDEKDVW

how is the original bone skeleton man doing?? OH OH AND is the setting the usual portal opening in the house and bam you've got new uncles or something else??? YAIOEPEPWLWKWPWBAOAV

buckle up, cuz this is super long yall 🥲

OKAY!!! THIS IS WHERE MY "INTERESTING" PART COMES IN 😁 monsters are just coming to the surface, and speciesism is as high as ever. after a year of this, queen toriel decides to open a human-monster program, something that also promotes her small school.

monsters adopt humans! ebbot was a bit iffy on it, but after realizing the benefits the mayor eventually agreed. (jk that nigga only wants the money 💀-) It was hard to get the program started, because many schools and orphanages werent as trusting, and the state wasn't fundinh it at all. So Toriel took a different approach.

Many monsters put their savings into it, considering their currency is literal fucking gold, and the program would allow each child to get $1000+ per month, depending on their age and needs. and yes giving kids thousands of dollars per year doesn't sound like a good idea, but shhhhh! the plot my dear!

The monsters who take care of them aren't allowed to use it themselves in selfish situations. Both the child and the guardian has rules.

one) you guys have to interact in some way. whether it be verbally, or even physically. two) NOTHING 18+, as all children being minors, that would be kinda weird. three) follow laws as follows- just dont be a shitty parent. four) the child has to want to participate as well, and cant do anything to hurt the guardian. including verbally (bc monster souls are made of feelings pretty much [thats another hc for another day])

id love to go deeper into the details, yet i however cannot bc i dont know how a parent-child program works.

and you have to be in the program for 1 month before you or the child wants to back out.

doesn't matter if its one-sided or not, when someone doesn't like it it immediately stops. id like to say that frisk and papyrus put most if their money into this, just so she can be adopted by toriel.

so when papyrus sees that gaster and sans have been stuck in the lab (not the basement!) for globs of hours at a time, sporadic sleeping, and overall exhaustion from work, he says the craziest shit

"SINCE YOU TWO ARE NERD BUMS, AND I CAN'T ALWAYS BE AT HOME FOR YOU TWO, I ADOPTED A HUMAN CHILD!!"

sans, in his sleep deprived state, promptly rose an eyebrow and fell out of his chair onto his side.

yea, its not that he didn't take the thing well, bro couldn't process it 💀💀

gaster just rolled his only visible eyelight and went back to work

....

well that worked well!!

reader arrived to the house the next day, and seeing that it was a two story house!?!?

AND there was an in-law suite? fuck yea! orphan kid made the jackpot 💥💥😼

they had fuckin steps too les goo!!

Your dark skin shined against the light of the sun, your brown eyes sparkling in excitement.

reader let go of papyrus's hand and ran inside immediately.

Careful as to not smudge your dirty shoes against the shiney floor, you looked around the house in amazement. This place had to have atleast 5 rooms!

and then the in law suite on the side looked like another 2 rooms!?? BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE!!

Not only did you have super nice guardians (you hoped), they were packed enough to keep you and themselves stabilized!! Hell, if theirs more people, they could support them aswell!!

Taking off your shoes, you looked around the living room. The long couch was green, albiet a bit patchy for a nice place, while the tan side couches could lean back!!

where those outlets on the sides? omg

"HAVING FUN DEAR HUMAN CHILD?" Papyrus smirked. He knew that the house of the Great Papyrus was enough to impress anyone, even of young ages.

"You guys are so rich!! wow- i mean, not that im tryna take your money or anything, but like- WOW!! Its so big!! Bigger than anything ive ever been to!" You were now flapping your hands and bouncing a bit. Your locs of hair bounced in it's pony tail no matter how small the fidget-hop was.

Behind the living room was a beautiful and lavish kitchen, and to the right there was the steps. To the right it looked like some like of master bedroom or guest bathroom.

But you didn't care about rooms right now, you wanted to see your other guardians!!

"Where are the other people im supposed to be meeting? Are you my only guardian or do they have to take care of me too? Are they mean? Are they bums? I hope they dont smoke or something, Do they have an addiction? What about-"

"THAT!, DEAR CHILD, IS GOING TO BE FOR INTRODUCTIONS!! DO NOT WORRY, WHILE THOSE TWO MAY BE GRUMPS, THEY ARE PLEASANT PEOPLE TO BE AROUND...EVEN IF THE LACK OF SLEEP TAKES THEIR PLEASANT PERSONALITY AWAY..." Papyrus concluded. You noticed that, despite the way he tried to talk to himself, you still heard it loud and clearly.

Maybe he had a hard time with volume control. meh.

Grabbing your hand and leading you towards the back door next to the kitchen, Papyrus opened the door. He had to lean down a bit in order to hold your hand, but he didn't mind.

The hallway was looooong. Instead of it being regular walls, it was glass windows of different colors. Which made you raise an eyebrow abit.

Seeing your reaction, the tall skeleton explained, "SINCE WE DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH SPACE FOR EXPERIMENTAL ACTIVITY, TOTALLY NOT BOMBS, MY BROTHER AND FATHER DECIDED TO LIVE IN THE SUITE!" He said, walking and talking.

You both reached the end of the hallway, hearing mumblings, ramblings, and overall terms that lowkey hurt your brain.

Getting too excited, you open the door to a glass-based lab. With the occasional plastic and metal equipment.

In the middle of the room there was an island counter filled was rainbow colored stuff ('gay as hell' , you sniggered), small green candies, and lots and lots if paper and pencils sharpened to the ends.

At one end of the room, there was a tall skeleton, a little shorter than Papyrus, who was more goop than skeleton. Infact, he looked like someone took a fire torch to his upper body, but you didn't say anything.

At the other end, there was a short skeleton, probably shorter than you (hah, being 5'0 did pay off), laying with his head on the desk, knocked out with blue slob. You marveled at the sight, wanting to know more about monsters at this revelation.

"FATHER! BROTHER! THIS IS THE CHILD I ADOPTED FOR ALL OF US!" Papyrus announced, grinning undauntedly. The smaller skeleton banged his head on the desk at the loud voice, while the other one barely flinched and turned slowly in irritation. "INTRODUCE YOURSELVES WHILE I MAKE LUNCH FOR THE GROWING FETUS!" He declared, marching out with a big smile.

If this plan went correctly, then his favorite family members would be mentally stable (as much as one could try- he thought to himself).

after banging his head on the damned table, sans sat up a bit disoriented.

why was there a human child in the house?

why was it in the lab?

"uhh kid, ur not supposed be here...uhh, its not safe and uh, you could die."

"WOW! Your so freakin cool! How do you talk without moving your face? Are you wearing a mask? I could die here! ooh shiney stuff, can i touch it?"

yea.. this kid has not had a proper friend in a minute

he was overwhelmed by the questions you asked at first, he didn't answer them at all in favor of watching gaster struggle to calm you down.

sans didn't mind how loud you were, it was moreso the curiosity that you brought along with you.

that wouldn't do.

"Hey! What's this?" the kid asked, walking towards the machine that could very much possibly cause the heat death of the universe, before getting snatched up by gaster.

"Enough! you are here to introduce yourself, and you will do as such" It was funny to see the man twitch like that. sans likes this kid already.

After knowing your name and age, sans was a bit surprised.

he honestly thought you were younger.

while introducing himself he tried to keep it simple and short. how old is he?

"how old am i old man?"

His blue slippers shifted from the movement of his ankle bones.

he thought you were just an average kid, but something about you was different.

oddly enough you always wore these earrings saying Y on the right and N on the left.

he wonder what it meant

Now its a week past since you came into the 'haunted house', aka the skele-dungeon

you two play pranks against gaster when he has free time. watching him bounce his leg in irritation every time he finds a lima bean in his notes is pure gold.

since you're virtual, due to your choice, he tries to take you places.

some of the most consistent ones are dance class every saturday and neighborhood walks you take by yourself.

I think of sans is the type of person to give less of a shit about his dad.

mostly because if the way he approaches things, iN tHE NaME oF sCIeNcE

it pisses him off everytime he tries to ask you for a blood sample

and it makes him even angrier when you say yes without a second thought.

but despite that, he cares about gaster.

but he wants to choke him out being his first son.

Despite being constantly sleep deprived, he makes time for this little new joy in his life.

Back then he's sleep at his desk, especially when his magic reserves were too low to shortcut.

But now, and you thought he didn't notice, you carry him to the living room of the main house and turn the tv volume down to 9 when you cant fall asleep.

another thing you both have in common

More often than not, you both find each other at the odd hours if the night.

since he can barely cook shit, it's mostly you making the midnight snacks

he appreciates the food you make for him, despite him initially coming to get a 10 1/2 ounce bag of chips

other times you guys will sit in the living room in silence

occasionally he'll find himself rambling to you about physics, specifically quantum, so he can keep his memory up.

sans likes the way you treat his brother.

as an uncle and not a childish cousin.

You may not be able to keep up with Papyrus's schedules and puzzles

but when you can, you two shine this wholesome light on the whole house that makes sans's soul ache lovingly.

Papyrus likes to take you out for walks more than him, or you'll both hang out in the backyard next to the glass hallway of the suite.

on his breaks, he'll find you two doing silly things

like rolling in the grass

or trying to carry each other.

without being able to admit it, sans and papyrus feel a new joy in their life.

and they got a cool kid to come with it :)

Gaster and sans were in the lab when his father said the most dumbest shit his nonexistent ears could ever listen to

gaster was never fully succumbed into the void, as sans had saved him before anything totally horrible happened.

hence his melted face and arms.

but he saw something, or rather somethings, that his meticulous little nerd brain has been hyperfiaxting on since the child came.

"Let's discover new universes!"

sans was just like 'naw, jit crazy'

so gaster fucks around with the machine for a while in secret while sans is frolicking with his newly adopted child.

ew, children.

but he guesses that she's okay, despite her adamant queries (hehe).

and soon enough, the machine made that man find out after he fucked around

Now that the machine stopped pouring in different variants of his children, this only made gaster more excited to use the machine.

sans on the other hand was fuckin freaking out.

the damn geezer did it

but not only that, there are aggressive ass versions of him who are willing to kill a child and that wont go.

sans is not gonna give on the things that bring him joy that easy.

*insert battle sequence*

ok so he got his ass whooped, no biggie.

and now his adopted child is befriending them. great.

annnddd now his brother is taking care of them. even better.

AANNNDD now his father is too interested in them to try and find a way to send them back. AMAZING!

bro wants to jump off a roof at this point

to be honest, he doesn't like the other versions of himself.

Theyre different possibilities of what could've happened currently and he already thinks about that enough.

but, reader likes them, so he gives them a pass.

but if they hurt her...or even worse, his brother...

he wont need the machine to figure out a way to take them out of this world.

KITTY!! THANK U SM!!! ✨❤️✨❤️✨🫣❤️🫣❤️ EKKK!! YOU GUYS BRING ME SUCH JOY 😋😋😋 YAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYAYATATATTATATATTATATATATATTATATATTATATATATTATATATA IM SO HAPPY!! YHSHABDGSIWKSBHSUWBWHAISNEGEYGSBAOWOAMQNWHUDBRYDUBJQIBSGATUWOWUEHRBXKMXBSYSJBSBZ-

i know the reader sounds super excited rn, which is sorta unexpected for an orphan centered fic, in the official thing you're gonna see a less than..nice attitude from them.

btw i wanna make a house plan to this can make more sense for your guys. ohhhhhhhh- IM TOO DAMN EXCITED 😋😋💕 i prolly gotta learn skeleton anatomy too-

@kittykittyanon @radicallxser @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl @ziipzeepzop-eez @amorvincitomnia-14 @spongejuice @cyb3r-st4r. if you would like to be added, check my blog. if you would like to be added, check my blog. SEE? I SAID IT TWICE!!

[anamericangirl]

Slavery is wrong of course in my opinion but when I look at the Bible God doesn't really seem to condemn it now does he? That might have something to do with the culture that produced these stories. So where was God for tens of thousands of years and why didn't he send his son to other places around the world? Please tell us also how Noah managed to fit a pair of every animal on earth on his stone age vessel and where I can find evidence in the geological record of a worldwide flood. Or should I take the more fanciful stories as metaphor? Like the one where the son is coming back to life for instance, or being conceived 'immaculately'. No objective morality does not mean there is no such thing as truth and I am certainly not obsessed with your opinion, just interested in what you think about these things. Thanks!

If you say slavery is wrong in your opinion then you're saying it's not wrong because your opinion doesn't mean anything. You thinking it's wrong is irrelevant in a world where objective morality doesn't exist. Because if objective morality doesn't exist then slavery is not wrong. Because there's no such thing as wrong. You just don't like it. But you can't actually say slavery is wrong or condemn the practice of it because by admitting objective morality doesn't exist you are admitting there's nothing objectively wrong with slavery.

Actually, if you really looked at and studied the Bible it would be clear that God does not condone slavery as you understand it. And also, we know you have a tendency to read things and somehow come away thinking they say the exact opposite of what they actually say so your interpretation of what you've seen in the Bible just can't be trusted since you've shown you have very poor reading comprehension skills.

But also, if morality is subjective, why does it matter if God condemns slavery? Why should he? You've admitted there is nothing objectively wrong with it so God should condemn it because you consider your opinion more valuable than the opinions of people living in cultures where slavery is still practiced?

There's lots of evidence out there that you are free to look at. I'm not going to compile it all for you here because that's a lot of work for me to do for someone who just tries to mock me in comments all the time and doesn't really want to understand and have decided beforehand you are just going to reject and dismiss whatever I say before I even take the time to sit here and type it all out for you.

Like there's literally a bunch of literature out there discussing the evidence that exists of a worldwide flood and just because you haven't taken the time to look into it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Sometimes you have to do the research and not wait for someone to hand you the information.

And there's no "evidence" that can prove an immaculate conception. You scoff at the idea of God, clearly do not understand His nature and do not possess a mind open to what Christianity or the Bible actually teaches and then you expect to see evidence of a supernatural miracle.

Wondering what I think is one thing and that's fine, creeping in my notes to try and mock whatever I say as if your subjective moral opinion carries more weight than those of anyone else and ignorance of every worldview other than your own and your attempts to be condescending and insulting by using the term "sky daddy" when you don't know the first thing about Christianity is another.

[the-alliance-maker]

More art from my younger sister, yay!

Mask (Baby Hero of Time) looks like that because he's worn the Fierce Deity Mask too many times for extremely long periods, and now it's started to stain/scar his skin.

I'm also putting her little doodle she made me bellow too.

Mask (Baby Hero of Time) has a/his shadow following him around. This is apparently my sister's view of their relationship.

(She was nervous about letting me post the gif and required that I clarified that it's a low effort, quick animation she only made to get a laugh out of me, lol. She was correct about making me laugh. I was in tears for, like, an hour.)

More explanations (And lack there of?) about it under the cut.

These pieces of art are both from an AU of mine that we roleplay a lot.

I'd explain more, but it's built off an alternate timeline/universe of @wutheringmights story "Call them brothers". And I'm not sure what her rules are about fanart or fanfics, mostly because I never asked or looked into it and I never intended to.

I make AUs for the fanfics I read, write fanfics for those fanfics with thousands upon thousands of words in them and then never post them or do anything other than hand them to my sister to read. She does the same with her art.

...Fandoms are messy enough without me accidentally stepping on someone's toes. (I think my sister doesn't post her art because she's too unconfident though.)

That aside, Call them brothers is literally my favorite fic I've ever read. I know we like to throw that phrase around in the fandom a lot, but I have every intention of getting that sucker printed and bound once it's finished. I've been reading Fanfiction for nearly a decade and this is the first one I've wanted to do that for.

If you're a person who enjoys darker stories and want a story line with some actual consequences for the characters, I'd totally recommend it. The last time I was this gut punched over characters and their development was Red Rising by Peirce Brown (My favorite published book series ever), and Wuthering's descriptions of a war ravaged country and all it's horrors is fucking immaculate.

I found Call them brothers through my desire to see a longer fic that had Spirit Tracks Link, and it did. not. disappoint.

Wuthering's takes on what Spirit's abilities, character traits, and game culture/lore are currently my favorite I've seen from anyone in the fandom, and I would doubly recommend the fic just for that.

That said, it's not a story for the faint of heart. It's Dark. With a capital 'd' for a reason. Wuthering doesn't add all those tag warnings for no reason. Also, if you can't stand to see one of the Link bois written as anything other than what the mainstream interpretation for them is, this isn't for you. War isn't out of character, but he's certainly a bold take. A fantastic one, but bold none the less.

Plus there's mild mentions of Links being interested in other character's that aren't their Zeldas or their typical love interests. There is NO shipping of the Jojo's characters amongst each other, but if you're the kind of person who can't stand alluding to characters having crushes that aren't Link x Zelda, it isn't for you.

I know there's some people in the fandom who don't like that kind of thing, so I thought I'd mention it. Also, you've been warned so no being mean to Wutheringmights about it!

If you're okay with the things I've listed, please, please, please give it a read. @wutheringmights deserves all the love for writing something so good.

(Anyway, I could ramble for hours about all the reasons Wutheringmights is my favorite Author in the LOZ fandom, but this was supposed to just be a post about my lil sis's art that got waaaaay away from me.)

[mayasaura]

So Anastasia is waiting in the tomb to reseal it of it gets opened. Does John know this? Because I am remember him at some point telling Harrow she can't have opened the Tomb it's (currently) closed. Because one - well that's a strange capability to hide from John unless you see a need to open the Tomb either multiple times or without him finding out. Two - Anastasia's reaction to Harrow coming in and then walking out would be interesting. And also the timing of when given Alecto's haunting.

That is a very good question. Does John know that Anastasia has been made into—or made herself into—a construct that can reseal the Tomb? Or did he only mean for her to die there, and take his secrets with her? I honestly have no idea. My first assumption had been that John arranged it so he could visit Alecto in secret, but that would be very risky and there's no evidence to support it. We don't know if he even knows it's possible for the ward to be breached and then resealed.

I do think what we saw in there was a construct made from Anastasia's corpse, rather than Anastasia's revenant. Maybe she's a hideous corpse, her revenant bound to a construct of her own bones, but it's impossible to say at this point how much of Anastasia is left after ten thousand years. She may or may not have been aware of Harrow's coming and going. But let's say she's in there, and conscious, and has been standing guard over Alecto for ten thousand years. Who put her there?

Anastasia worked closely with Cassiopeia, and Cassiopeia knew a great deal more than John about blood wards. It's possible she and Anastasia planned to be able to access the Tomb without John's knowledge. Cassiopeia has been known to build secret mechanisms at the heart of Houses. And if Augustine meant it about Harrow being very much like Anastasia, then using her own bones as the material for the mechanism sounds just like her, too.

Evidence from the labs suggests that it was Anastasia and Cassiopeia who created the skeletal servitors at Canaan House, but also that they asked for John's input on that project. So that's sum zero; any of them could have done it.

Putting aside for a moment who set it up, you bring up another great question: Has anyone other than Harrow been in there?

If it's John's doing, he probably has. Boring answer, doesn't delve into any deep mysteries. If it was Anastasia and Cassiopeia... Well. I can think of at least one time the Tomb was a sitting duck. At the moment of Harrow's conception there was a thanergy bloom large enough to irradiate the planet, and the key to the Tomb was already on the Ninth. Literally anyone could have rolled the Rock away, provided they knew who Gideon was and knew that the thanergy bloom was going to happen. I can't say whether or not anyone did, but it would have been possible.

This has me thinking about some of the other unanswered questions. Like how weirdly convenient it is that Harrow's parents were able to reinvent the Resurrection to make her, when there's no evidence of them having an expertise in spirit magic. And how oddly coincidental the timing, that preparations to put the plan into action must have started around the time of Gideon's birth. Why create one last child of Anastasia's direct line, if it comes at the expense of any future for her House? How does Blood of Eden have inside knowledge of the Sixth House, millennia out of date? Who sent the message Aim carries, and who is it meant for?

It does seem like there's a third party working behind the scenes, and there has been for a very long time. Someone with a great deal of knowledge about spirit magic, who knows about the vow Alecto made to Anastasia, who has reason to want the truth to come out. Whether that third party is Anastasia, or Anastasia working in concert with Cassiopeia, or some secret third option, I can't be sure. But there is a whiff of conspiracy about it that has only gotten stronger with the revelations in Nona.

But really, I just want Anastasia to be there of her own volition, for some more dignified reason than to act as John's sepulchral porter. Might as well make Samael into a coat rack to complete the set.

[whiskerknittles]

This Is A Jenna D’Sora Callout Post

Most of you won’t know her by name, but this is the despicable ensign who briefly dated Data in the season 4 episode “In Theory”. I hate this woman. She fills me with a rage so intense I can’t even describe it—but that won’t stop me from trying!

Background: D’Sora, after leaving a relationship with an emotionally unavailable boyfriend, decided to try a relationship with Data because they had similar interests and enjoyed spending time together. The relationship fell apart when D’Sora told Data that he, by virtue of being an android, is even more emotionally unavailable than her ex, and they break up.

Thesis: Data was the most authentic and attentive partner anyone could ever ask for, and D’Sora is an idiot.

Evidence:

1. D’Sora routinely disrupts and changes their plans, doesn’t communicate her own needs, and flat out lies* to Data multiple times in the episode. In fact, she disrupts his personal time in order to start one of their dates early, denies that’s why she showed up, and then when he accepts her denial as the truth and goes back to what he’s doing, she gets upset. What is up with that?!??

(*lie is probably a strong word to anyone who knows what I’m talking about—the thing in relationships where someone says something like “oh no I’m not mad” when they are or “oh we don’t have to do that” when they specifically do want to do that. It’s some kind of mind reading game you’re supposed to master to prove that you love your partner because expecting honesty and explicit communication goes against the rules of romance, apparently.)

2. Data not only pursues the relationship despite having no experience in romantic intimacy, he writes himself an entire program to help him perform romantic behaviors. Sure the code wasn’t perfect, but it was a massive effort and also a work in progress! I guarantee Data built other intimacy programs in the past (friendship at the minimum) that he spent a lot of time working bugs out of, but he didn’t have to write a romance code—he did it explicitly for her!!

3. She gets upset when she asks Data what he was thinking about when they were kissing and his first thought wasn’t her. I get why that could be seen as a sign he doesn’t care, but as a person with a partner whom I kiss with regularity, sometimes you’ve got other shit on your mind! It’s not that you don’t care or don’t want to kiss them, it’s that mushing mouths together really doesn’t take up that much brain power and if you’re doing it for any length of time you’re gonna think about other stuff! If that’s true for humans, imagine how it must be for an android built to do literally hundreds, THOUSANDS, of calculations all at the same time. That’s not a sign he’s emotionally unavailable, that’s just how his brain works!!

Conclusion: there’s actually a bunch more I could say on the point of Data having emotions that we as humans just can’t understand, and everyone’s emotional needs are different. However! Data was not the failing partner in their romantic venture, it was 100% D’Sora, who has a 20th century attitude toward romance in the 24th century future (yeah I know the writers are from the 20th century, that’s no excuse) and the fact that she walked away from it implying that Data wasn’t enough for a human romantic partnership is a crock. If given an opportunity to make out with Data I’d do it, and I wouldn’t be a coward about it