#besides ive seen people post way worse

[regalityandcoffee]

Fuck it, if I post the yandere/possessive headcanon for Regal I made are yall gonna care?

[etoilesbienne]

people keep saying that qsmpblr is open to criticism but every day i believe it less. like ive seen more people open to criticism (if not criticizing stuff themselves) of quackitys/qstudios actions on twitter (where people are notorious for sending death threats at the slightest expression of dislike) than on tumblr. the tweets ive seen sharing the translation(s) on twitter have thousands of likes and hundreds/thousands of retweets, lots of people there are actually talking about it, and not just the ones who already were before leas interview (like the majority of people i see discussing it here on tumblr)

and the toxic positivity i see from people on tumblr about this is wild, refusing to look anywhere but the brightest side and suppressing any negative feelings or outlooks (including from others, but i saw that more in the first few weeks). its ok to not be ok with whats happening.

i do think its partially an issue of the community on tumblr being smaller so anyone who does want to share their criticism is wary of the fact that they might be quietly ousted from the community and lose friends and mutuals over it, or worse harrassed about it. i think its part of the reason the more "harsh" criticisms you (general you) see of the server or qstudios or quackity is are from anon asks on blogs that have shown theyre open to actual discussion, because it means that they dont have to be "open" on their own blogs about the fact theyre not waiting with no reassurance of real change actually (including myself in this, ive gone on a ramble or two in some peoples asks)

and also even before the workplace abuse came out, any criticism of lore seemingly had to be disclaimered 10 times over about not hating anyone involved in the lore, not hating the admins, and not hating people who did enjoy it. and it seemed like anyone being critical is seen as sending hate unless they stated this every other line in their post. (exaggerating a little but you get my point)

and now with WORKPLACE ABUSE.... at first you had the disclaimer that "quackity didnt know" (still bad??? he should know whats going on in his own company???), and then (and still now) the "just wait and trust theyre working on it" (when we still have no proof from them of any changes besides firing half their staff, and as far as we know still no contact with the people who were affected by their labour rights violations for any testimony? why should i trust qstudios), and NOW the tearing apart of everything lea says or does in order to somehow discredit her (because shes not a perfect virtuous pure sinless victim, but instead outspoken about the abuses she faced), as if discrediting her as the first to speak out will put the multiple other corroborating testimonies back in the skeleton filled closet..

idk this got kinda rambly TLDR qsmpblr isnt actually "open to criticism" beyond the mildest possible and they never have been.

Oh lord don't you know it. I had some interesting asks with very choice words in it back when I criticized the way people treated Jaiden & Baghera regularly ! Qsmpblr is possible to have a nicer experience because it is so much smaller, but having a smaller experience means you are at risk for different issues just as much as you are for a bigger one !

[3point14a]

loon defense post because ive been thinking about him so much it like physically hurts

People rip on him a lot for being 1) being sorta cringy with his use of words and way of speaking 2) too attached to usagi 3) being too shy and sort of useless 4) not taking the HINT with usagi

And i say!!! guys lets put ourselves in his shoes please god

At the start of the series we learn that Freddy is new, and so he doesn't know where anything is, and he presumibly came in later than all the other people since everyone already had seats and such when he gets introduced, its not the first day for everyone, he got in a little later.

Then, Loon arrives to THE COUNTRY or at the very least the school in episode FIFTEEN. at the same time town does the event announcement, he's the first "international competitor", he has a weight on his shoulders and knows absolutely no one but usagi. And it's past the point of fraternizing at this point, if people are as competitive about this event as lets say Meg is, then trying to talk to people would probably be seen as trying to get info or get intel or do something regarding the competition instead of just... Wanting to get more used to the completely new enviroment you are in.

And, I know his use of japanese is butchered at best and just straight up nonsense at worst, but that's a fault of the writers and not a thing in-universe. In-character both he and usagi are japanese, but he uses a LOT more japanese words and expressions without seeminly thinking about it, he is STILL on the process of going full spanish, bilingual or not it is hard to stay 100% in it, and he defaults to words in his native language or just straight up small exclamations he lets out without thinking. He's not mechanically 100% in spanish he's doing that thing where you think in one language and translate stuff as it comes out of your mouth.

Given all of that its NORMAL that he clings so much to the one girl who he knows and who speaks his language, he is in a completely new country with a new language and he has ONE person who can give him sense of normalcy, and it's clear they both care about eachother. People love to make usagi fully uninterested in all that regards Loon, but she did sign him into her team without asking, she did get super exited to see him and they do have a history, it's unfair to say it's onesided because despite the nature of their feelings being different, they still very clearly deeply care for eachother.

I would also be shy and useless if i was stuck in a completely new country and culture, we do see him act more confidently with Usagi but he probably got overwhelmed by how talkative (?) and sociable culture is in latam. Strangers carry themselves in a completely different way than he's been used to and that's intimidating! his spanish isn't 100% perfect and natural sounding either so that also makes it scary! I would also be shy and useless.

and on the topic of Loon's feelings towards usagi, i have 2 possible routes to take with it:

Can't kids have crushes anymore???? is being silly a crime in this economy??? it's realisticcccc he's young, he's discovering stuff, him being unable to say how he feels upfront is reasonable given that if Usagi takes negatively to it, he would be left completely on his own. He has no other connections and the posibility of ruining that is SCARYYYY. It's not as much as spineless cowardice but a genuine conflict of his feelings vs the posibility of his one stable connection being severed because of it. Besides everyone treats it as a crime but Usagi literally does not mind or does not realize, not once has that girl been uncomfortable around Loon, he's just like that and it doesn't seem to break any boundary at all

Am i crazy to say maybe it wasn't a crush at all? It's hard to interpret feelings and crushes in general, and its WORSE when you're a teenager. He hadn't seen his friend in years and when he had the chance to be with her he clinged and had that ovewhelming urge to just stay by her side. Now that he is actually next to her he can hug her and hold her and she is his BEST FRIEND and seeing her again just sparked a lot of really intense feelings that he assumed meant he had a crush. Idk i feel like that'd be nice to explore...

and yeah thats it loon fnafhs they could never make me hate you

[tiktaalic]

I hope these questions don't annoy you, but whats it like working in a lab?

I'm considering the same career path cause I really like my lab classes so far

Not annoying! from what ive seen there are 3 or so types of labs, which are labs in the hospital, which are obviously a faster pace (did half of my preceptorship in one), reference labs, which get a fairly high volume since they're doing testing everybody's sending out for (did other half of my preceptorship in one), and privately owned labs which pick up samples from clinics urgent cares nursing homes etc (both of my jobs have been with private labs).

I like it! It's very routine. I have my set of tasks i do when i clock in and my set of tasks i do at the end of the night and in between I'm just sticking samples on the machines and releasing results. and there is imo enough variation to it to keep it interesting - troubleshooting failed qc, or double checking criticals, or having to do manual difs. if you're liking undergrad lab work I'm assuming you're doing stuff like pcr and gels and micro plates? which is a lot of what molecular departments do in a lab besides micro which is micro. I currently work in the core portion of a lab, which is hematology, coagulation, urinalysis, and chemistry. You really only break out the microscope for urinalysis and hem. we have a micro department that handles all the cultures, and a molecular department that does molecular testing. lots of labs have small micro factions and do lots of micro send out instead. the last lab i worked at did that. the hospital i did my preceptorship at would do plating, but then send all the plates out to be read and send out all the blood culture tubes to be cultured elsewhere. the lab I'm currently at does most cultures in house.

re: education to work in a lab you have to be ASCP certified. After I got my biology degree, I enrolled in texas tech's CLS certification program, which was 3 semesters of classes (preceptorships were the majority of the coursework the last semester). I didn't mind doing it because I was a fresh graduate and I didn't want to Career Hunt or go to grad school. so 3 sems to get a guaranteed job sounded great to me. Since I had my bio degree, I had most of the baseline credits out of the way. chem biochem ochem cell bio genetics etc etc. And the 3 sems I did were lab specific courses like blood banking, clinical chemistry, molecular methods, immunology, phlebotomy, lab management, clinical micro and hematology. there are tons of post bachelor's cls programs, and tons of them are delivered online so that you can chip away at it part time while working.

A nice thing about it is that you can get work literally anywhere. I moved to a town with a population of 90k. Applied for 3 jobs as a brand new graduate. and got 3 offer letters. the payscale's pretty variable, depending on where you are, but it is nice to know that i'm certified in like. 47 states and could get some sort of job in any of them no problem. i think once you've been certified a year you can get cali state certification, which is the route a lot of people go since cali is on the high end of the pay scale. it'll depend on what the lab you're at is like, obviously, but it is pretty difficult to get day shift positions since what a lot of places do is open internal applications for any night/evening shift people who want to move up. I work an evening shift of 2pm to 11pm and i really like it. A very common complaint i see is that there's no like... career ladder. if you're a bench tech. you're a bench tech. which sometimes gets parlayed into section leader, or section manager, but that's a years of experience thing.

My plan is to work in the same place for a couple of years so I feel more experienced, and then to take a few travel contracts which are shorter term higher pay. again, they're available pretty much anywhere, but sometimes the tradeoff is lower compensation or a worse shift or being in the middle of nowhere america. but i think it'll be fun to get paid to bop around the country for awhile. I like my job and I like that it's very secure, but I do plan to go back to school for Something Else at some point and probably shift careers. My review: good thing to do in your twenties! good thing to have under your belt in general. very dependable.

if you have other questions in general or about anything I said you can 100% msg me! Ik I had a lot of trouble finding info when I was looking into this as an undergrad

[ludinusdaleth]

hey, i'm new to cr fandom and wasn't there when c2 was airing, may i ask out of curiosity what was the fandom's problem with its ending?

i want to start by saying this post is meant as a personal memory and not an incitement of any discourse. i do not want a lot of asks or replies or anything about this if i can help it. i would also politely ask that no one reblog this as i really just. dont want attention about this when ive discussed it to death on twitter. i also apologize for not having screenshots but i truly cannot bring myself to wade through that again. it was bad enough i still have nightmares about it.

basically, about 3 eps before c2's end, matt clarified on twitter the campaign was coming to a close, and that. did not go well. you see, folk (myself included, though i wasnt part of the following clown show) were very sure c2 would continue a while. it felt unfinished as the empire/trent had to be taken down, and for some of us ludinus was clearly the big bad, etc. so this was incredibly jarring to a lot of folk. and with that came anger. a lot of critique came down to fear of things being rushed, a lack of closure, claims of extreme neoliberialism due to not taking down the empire (i could write an essay on and cite multiple leftist activists who have stated c2 is truthful to the activist tale, not neoliberalism, and also how c3 deconstructs beau & caleb's actions, but everyone is allowed to have their own opinion on it), and that if shadowgast did not fuck in this short timespan the fans were going to kill liam & matt. and threats of killing were the least of what ensued. im just gonna put a tw here for discussion of extreme harrassment and even threat of necrophilia/rape:

people were. atrocious. beyond atrocious. know why 4sd/a lot of q&a events of theirs for a while had no fan questions? partially bc fans were frankly terrible at asking non-ship questions on talks machina, but mainly because folk FILLED their inboxes with insults (and a twitter account was made of screenshots bragging about it) that only the crew would get to filter out, not the cast. know why dani was terrified to show her face on 4sd for a bit? c2 fans would not let up on how it was her cishet fault fjorjester happened. people thought the solution to alleged neoliberalism was to therefore @ travis saying they would defile his veteran fathers corpse. if there was any solid discussion critiquing c2 happening, it was so drowned that actors who had nothing to do with the show told cr fans to stay away if that was how they treated their favorite creators wanting a break. it really didnt help that a certain disgraced talks machina host was firing potshots on twitter when the cast seemed to be just trying to take it all in, so more discourse was kicked up from him. in general besides all of that, you had the average death & even a few rape threats you would expect from the pits of fan entitlement. the way they were hardly the most notable of the insults hurled their way still rattles the mind. and thats just what i saw. my friends have claimed to have seen worse, but if we can help it we dont discuss it in detail, it's that bad. like i said, any idea of an actual conversation about c2 and how someone felt about it from an analysis perspective was not even a drop in the bucket; there was no actual discourse but rather spitting hatred pouring over that mistook personal grievances for excuses to mistreat quite literally anyone around them who didnt agree that threatening to defile someone was funny bittersweet revenge.

the thing is, after the c2 finale happened? i mean, a lot of folk didnt originally like it (i think it's generally pretty well liked now, and i enjoy it), but it wrapped up a lot of issues pretty well. all that terror & terrorizing over a fictional story was really for nothing. and even if it had ended undebateably badly did anything warrant that fallout?

there are of course a few other factors that seperate cast from fandom now. laura also got innumerable threats from tlou fans for playing some antagonist character, twitter is a dysfunctional shithole, and it's just rational the more popular you get to not be buddy-buddy with fans. but that was. a Time, for sure. c3 is a decent campaign but im far from the first person to note that many of its traits are set in trying to find vox machina's fixed story beats so no story beat is left "unturned" and being as un-m9-like as possible, even when they love the m9. a lot of the worst m9 fans now who harrass other campaign enjoyers and lament c2 being "an unloved middle child" are folk who never left the bitterness they held in that time. for as much discourse as c3 has kicked up i really dont think any of it compares to the sheer scale of what happened late may 2021, and im hoping with all my heart it never does reach that level ever again (i think c3 has a slightly smaller (at least online) fanbase compared to c2, and isnt marked by a pandemic hiatus, so hopefully that means something).

i hope i answered your question. i really hate remembering this time but sometimes i think it should be remembered so folk know what the cost of extreme parasociality is. the distance the cast has from fans now is not only earned but maybe should have always been there, so things never evolved to that extremity. but now it's done and gone. i envy people who watch cr on their own merits and didn't get sucked into twitter at the time; it has been fascinating watching folk say they love the travelercon/aeor arcs and the ending. rewatching later c2 really emphasizes how many complaints hinged on extremely online & parasocial headspaces - you definitely wont hear anyone nowadays say liam is a biphobic cishet abusing matt by not making caleb kiss essek yet. i hope new fans have a better time than we did. oh - and get off twitter.

[kazpurr]

1, 3, 6, 7, 8, 10, 14, 15, 21, 22, 24

theres a good reason im putting this on my main and not my warrior cats sideblog because i think id be torn to shreds on there if i put any of these there lmao

1. the character everyone gets wrong

everyone is wrong about them but me (i like them) : nightheart, bramblestar, jayfeather, crowfeather, breezepelt, rootspring, bristlefrost, berryheart, curlfeather

everyone is wrong about them but me (i despise them) : nightcloud, ivypool, sparkpelt, lionblaze, shadowsight

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

these

trust me theres more but im lazy lol

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

im so sorry but anyone who ships squirrelflight with anyone are the most annoying people bc they only ship her with other cats besides bramblestar to make a point. her canon mate sucks so they have to ship her with the next worse choice . every squirreldaisy shipper would call you slurs for shippihg squirrelmoon. squirrelmoon shippers will kill you for shiping squirrelleaf. all 3 of them would kill you if you said you shipped squirrelbramble

7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

squirrelflight. this is why im not putting this on my warriors blog LMAO im sorry i cant stand the way the fandom talks about her. every time a new book comes out people ignore everything to be liek "squirrelstar was written out of character. we need to kill erin hunter about this" like holy FUCK you guys need to shut up i am this close to blocking the squirrelflight / squirrelstar tag + filtering out any posts with her name in it i swear to god. shes a fine character but everyone makes liking her their entire personality trait and shes like the one character that if you dislike her you're sexist... fuck me man

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

any opinion that involves another character who did bad things but apologized and no longer does bad things. ie crowfeather who had a shit relationship with breezepelt, apologized, and have since moved on and improved their relationship. but people still insist crowfeather needs to be "punished" or worst of all go to the dark forest. like. crowfeather's trial (his super edition) was all about him regaining the respect of his ex mate and child...

10. worst part of fanon

the ships. sorry 90% of all fanon ships or things ppl want to be canon are just awful. i cant stand any jayfeather or squirrelflight ships, and they end up making these relationships their entire personality. "this is my warriors rewrite, jayfeather instead becomes mates with poppyfrost!!!!!! then they have babise and jayfeather personally kills berrynose (poppy's canon mate) and bramblestar and all the evil people and then he becomes leader and he and poppyfrost have 29859 babies together !!!" you will be boiled. into the pit with you

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

honestly i don't read a lot of warriors fics. BUT. i will say the one thing that boils my blood is when people change the names of things in universe and make it so far disconnected from warrior cats that it cant even be called that. "the river colony" "thunder clowder" "the roles are Chief Commander, Second In Command, Doctor , Herbalist, Seer, Hunter , Fighter, Monarch, and The Wise Ones!" "warrior name are instead typed as The (Prefix) (Suffix)!" "firestar's leader name will be changed to Star Firethunder!" shut uppppp shut up shut up i want to tear you apart with my teeth i HATE THIS an UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

nightheart being orange . stop it. stop it stop it stop it

i also dont like it when warriors designs are extrmely unrecognizeable. bluestar is. well. blue. but the amount of times ive seen her drawn with black fur, green eyes, or white fur and dark blue eyes, or as like a blue tabby with green eyes, or something liek that it just makes me go. who the fuck is that

21. part of canon you think is overhyped

i think a lot of warriors villains are pretty overhyped. maybe thats just me i dont really see the appeal in most of them. though i like this current arc's villains, curlfeather splashtail and berryheart, i dont really find anything good about like. darktail or sol or hawkfrost. not even as characters bc To Me there's like nothing going for them. hawkfrost was the big bad of arc 2 but being evil was his entire personality and so he was just boring to read about, but he's easily the most overhyped villain out of like . All of them

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

this ones hard bc warrior cats is so constantly overanalyzed and picked apart that no one really "ignores" anything. i guess a more easier question is something that people dont acknowledge enough or do anything with and thats like. anything to do with starclan, really. when starclan comes up people only bring up the fact that in canon its all corrupt and evil but instead of playing into that idea (because honestly, its really cool, whether the books intend to portray it that way or not) they instead try to make it perfectly good and not evil instead of rolling with it. like come on we need more ocs with religious trauma !!! lmao

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

nightheart . say his name anywhere and youll get either ppl who are ike "YES I LOVE NIGHTHEART AND I HATE ALL WOMEN!!!!!" or people who are like "YES I HATE NIGHTHEART AND I HATE ALL MEN!!!!!!!!" and theres no in between and neither person is right

also anything about any age gaps whatsoever. me personally i think 90% of warriors age gaps are inherrently flawed and bad (ie older adult warrior male pines after young apprentice she-cat and become mates as soon as the apprentice becomes a warrior) but also theres people who have claimed that completely normal relationships that started when both parties were several years old are the smame thing (ie thornclaw and blossomfall, or thrushpelt and bluestar). its just something where no one wins lol no matter what side ur on

@hyperlinkblocked1997 there i finally answered ur ask sorry this took like 3 hours LMAO

[oldmemoria]

i have a lot of unorganized miguel headcanons that float around my brain at times but since i usually think of them at night and forget about them the next morning im just going to continuously update this post probably? anyway here are the ones that i do remember

i will either leave this in my drafts and update it when i want to or ill just edit/reblog with new stuff idk

edit after i stopped typing:

ok its time

fuck you

posts

identity headcanons first, because idk getting those out of the way feel free to get pissed off about these ill just block you 💖

trans man. he/him pronouns. probbably doesnt care if you use gender neutral terms for him because like... why would he, he has a multiverse to stare at

asexual, can't really figure out of i see him as being aromantic as well, i personally just think he's too busy to think about it atm but i dont think hes incapable of it. maybe arospec, like demiro or greyro or smth idk, i just know this mf is asexual.

he is autistic (and probably undiagnosed?) i will die on this hill as if i was a warrior cat defending the sunningrocks i will commit an oakheart fight me on this and i will throw rocks at you and then promptly get crushed by rocks as well (is that warrior cats spoilers um oops sorry)

now to the rest- that i remember- i have not read the comics yet so if some of these are like.. actually canon lmk because that would be really funny

this one might be a hot take but he does not hate miles. he wants to look out for him and definitely either currently regrets or is going to regret what happened in that chase scene. i genuinely doubt he hates any of the spider-gang hes just very, very worried about the multiverse. in his head thats the only way. (i am hoping and pleading that miguel and miles make up somehow, maybe miles doesnt forgive miguel and that totally understandable and would make sense but pLEASE writers i would die if you kept them as being rivals i genuinely would)

he hates Audrey Hepburn, fangoria, harry houdini, AND croquet. he CAN swim, he CAN dance, and he DOES know Karate. he still wont make it though. sorry man.

since hes from the future i dont think he'd be terribly confused by current slang/terms, hed more look at it like we see terms from like... the 80-90s or anything before that as "oh wow people used to say that? huh. interesting."

im going back on a headcanon ive had since i saw the movie im SoRRYYY but he cant curse. from what ive seen from the comics he uses replacements like "shock" and "bithead", thats it. maybe he says fuck on accident or in spanish (he technically kind of does depending on how you see "Ay Coño" being said but thats beside the point).

probably a blue eyes hater idk he just gives me the vibe of saying "jesus christ your eyes are way too blue, get contacts please im begging you stop looking at me" which is probably why him and gwen have so much beef.

i dont give a shit about what the movie says his fangs are not retractable fuck you. (he still has crooked teeth though i will never forget about those <3 )

autism be damned my guy can work a grill 🔥🔥🔥🔥

a lot of people cant really tell if hes pissed or not by his tone sometimes. is this projection? yeah, next question.

he hardly ever sleeps but when he does its like hes dead (at least when its dead quiet, which again, isnt often so he hardly ever gets a good nights sleep). you'd have to use a fucking blowtorch to the face to wake him up.

i also see him as not only having hypersensitive vision but also having elevated senses period. hearing, smell, touch, etc. probably the main reason he sits in the dark with no other noise.

branching off of that he frequently gets migraines of things get to stressful or too loud or if anything is very off about his schedule.

arachnophobe. ha.

cat person.

cat person as in he likes cats not like hes a catboy.. i shouldnt specify that actually that just makes it worse but i will anyway because tumblr hellsite will be tumblr hellsite

he partially likes lego peter because his daughter really liked lego.

ok but like think about it he'd probably be really good at taking legos apart with those claws. like imagine. it'd be nothing for him.

hasnt spoken to gabriel in years. he cant bring himself to reach out and when gabriel does he just doesnt have the energy to try and respond. he has no idea how to, especially now.

this is very specific but he stims a lot with his claws. like extend and retract over and over absentmindedly (mainly because thats what i'd do if i had claws imagine how fun that would be)

he usually bottles up all the emotions that he has, including anger. kind of explains why he lost it in the chase scene in my head because he reached a boiling point. he hates talking to people about his problems.

empanadas are his safe food, also theyre just easy to eat when your mouth is a little funky (i would know i have some fucked up braces theyre great for that 10/10), its mostly just easier on his fangs.

definitely horrible at the whole self are thing. he just forgets, all the time. would forget to breathe if it wasnt involuntary

if you say anything he doesnt particularly like (eg "hey bro are you okay do you wanna talk") he'll just stare at you with his rat eyes like 👁️👁️ until you stopped idk what im saying.

he is a bit touch starved, depending on his mood he'll let people touch him in a friendly (emphasis on friendly. friendly friendly friendly dont take it any other way :/) way.

OH I almost forgot about this one: he hisses. some spiders hiss. so does he. vampire furry energy

he also gets pissed when people call him a vampire so uh... im counting my days oops.

will go out and sit in the rain. (wait would it still rain in the future? is the climate still fucked in his timeline or nah)

like "ah, its water time" and goes out to sit like this:

Man if only there was a rain filter

that is all i have for now maybe if something else comes up ill reblog with new stuff >:)

[blueiight]

The biggest WTF for me is when book fans are like well Louis is a liar in the books about why xyz didn't happen in the show and I'm like well if he's lying about everything then why am I watching this show?? are you gonna retell the entire first season with what really happened? cause I feel like the show is wasting my time then.

Any and all Lestat propaganda is lost on me. Anytime someones like well in the books he's not like this, I'm like I dont care that's not what he's like on the show so stfu.

Also I have no fucking clue what ppl are talking about with daniel + armand most of the time like I don't understand how the fuck s1 hints at anything other than an adversarial relationship at the moment.

im assuming ur the same anon as here..

and its like yeah its obvious some things didnt happen the way they did cuz its louis’s point of view & we will get another look at certain scenes but if the whole season is a total lie thats a waste of tv lol. granted the book iwtv narrative is more straightforwardly dark. theres no two interviews theres just one interview in the 70s (which was contemporary. iwtv published in 1976) .and the most that’s ‘contradicted’ in that imo is.. of course getting lestat’s point of view and all but also. ok. so you know how in the show lestat kills the tenor and clicks out on louis saying embrace what you are? in the book, lestat did the same thing but it was w/ these sex workers/prostitutes instead. in tvl lestat is like well actually these women were robbing the seamen so i wasnt the bad guy. this is actually why i think show lestat is nicer than book lestat! not rly cuz he did the same shit to lily. seriously tho book and show les were twins separated at birth and sent off to different universes imo. & in the book louis links w/ lestat whos bog body down bad holding a child and turning his back on him its irony its melodrama and we’re never sure if that scene actually happened. according to les well it didnt and louis was just a drama queen embellishing. thats what louis is, a drama queen embellishing things LOL. & the suspicion around armand is warranted like hes a powerful vampire with an adeptness in the mind gift, but he also loves lestat + his form of showing that is yandere crazy af aka torturing the people lestat cares about if not beating and tormenting lestat himself and its like..armand would do some shit like that hes crazy but itd be a bit boring if all of s1 was a big lie ?. let all the yaoi be problematic! i def think that theres some freaky shit going on between armandxlouis… the 1x07 reveal was like heyy danny ik i just checked out 5 seconds ago but i went from a bad bf to worse :3 the snake sheds his skin as ive dubbed it. i thought armand was rashid tvc until i seen the marius painting and the reveal had me sooo hype. the finale is the biggest divergence in the book besides the obvious changes (race, era, certain scenes etc etc) the fact that theres 2 interviews and that armand x louis are together in the modern day. in the book armand broke up with louis just before the interview, tried to mack on bog body struggle bus lestat and when all that failed he went to fuck w/ daniel. daniel was named in the third book finally and he was revealed to be w/ armand to have this crazy psychosexual bdsm worldwide cruising (well. armand watching danny fuck) blood airtagging romance rigmarole for a few yrs post interview cuz armand wanted someone to teach him what being human was like again and daniel wanted a demonic satanic zaddy. i am the devil’s minion (title chap drop!) armand’s put in a situation where he has to turn a dying 32 year old (book) daniel into a vampire. in the show clearly, daniel is old now but hes dying still. s1 doesnt show much so i can get why ur confused but in later seasons the nature of all their relationships between show armandxlouis , daniel & what happened and how theyll adapt the axd dynamic will be clearer to us all. i just think ppl r too committed to particular fan theories or takes rn. the ennui of being into an ongoing adaptation

[kabutoraiger]

decided to play and finish tales of the abyss for the very first time... in actuality i did not quite finish it as i made it to the final dungeon, failed 10 times at the solo asch fight due to being horrendously bad at video games, and gave up & experienced the rest via the let's play on lparchive (which id already been skimming for all the obtuse side quests i missed)

regardless, i ended up surprisingly conflicted on this one... i watched the anime adaptation as a teen and remember really liking it and ive osmosised the game as one of the best tales but in practice it's like. half something im extremely into and half really not.

when the plot is focused on the score and the replicas and the themes of self determination from both those angles are coalescing it's like yes!! epic!! thinking about van's scheme and the idea of putting faith in an exact copy of the world & all its people to live on while you die along with the original... just like SOMA! 🥰 - me when something is just like SOMA.

but then as soon as i start having to button through whole convos about fonic resonance or sephiroths or whatever the fuck my mood just plummets and im like

"what it's like playing tales of the abyss when you're gay and dumb and still don't know what a fonon is 40 hours in"

as an established jrpg liker i do have some built in resistance to sf/f jargon but i dunno. smth about this feels so much harder to follow than what's typical for tales...

and i feel the same kind of split opinion about the characters like this game has me by the throat with what jade and guy have going on but the rest of the party simply does Not hit for me. luke is interesting as a vehicle for the plot & its existential questions i guess but as an actual character. not so much. same with asch. and all 3 of the girls feel weak in the ranks of tales girls. tear in particular is so boringg 😭 im perfectly willing to open my heart to basic-ass "responsible no nonsense woman who secretly loves cute things" type characters but only if they have literally anything going on besides that!!

not to mention that abyss is pretty aesthetically blah for a tales game... even if i did play the 3ds version, on which to quote a popular tumblr post "a polygon has never looked worse", ive seen a bunch of the original too and it just looks so washed out & there's so few truly memorable locations in this world to begin with. symphonia was the same gen and it had a better desert town, faaar better snow town, fun amusement park locale, etc. i suppose abyss does have its own carnival type place but a ton of players will never even see it so like. 😐

i dunno. it was a real ups and downs experience for sure. glad to finally get to it though after all these years. maybe i am on my way to finally becoming a non-fake tales fan. we shall see!

[thestobingirlie]

I saw a r/nance shipper make a post about why would it be considered a betrayal to steve if robin and nancy started dating. as if steve is totally invisible there.

but the thing about this post that bugged me the most is they went on to say 'oh if robin is betraying steve by getting with nancy, steve is betraying robin in all the fics that have steve/vickie, and steve getting with vickie would be a bigger betrayal because of robins crush and no one is talking about this betrayal'

and i was just???? my dude, you are creating an imaginary scenario. I just looked, there are a total of 2 steve/vickie fics on ao3. and both of those its as part of a polycule that also includes robin. and I've been following the steve tag on tumblr for a while and I've never seen any steve/vickie content on here.

And even if there were steve/vickie content, getting with a friends current or former crush is very different to getting with a friends ex that hurt them badly at the end of the relationship.

I would know, ive been in both scenarios. I've had a friend get with my crush, and yeah, I felt a little betrayed, but I got over it and we stayed friends. I've also had a friend get with an ex where there had been a messy and painful break up. The betrayal was so much worse at this point, and our friendship never recovered, even after they broke up.

Robin is Steve's best friend. Her getting with Nancy would be the biggest betrayal to Steve possible because of the way Nancy treated Steve in their relationship (as a placeholder for Jonathan, and then the whole bathroom scene.). If Steve had any self respect, he wouldn't be able to stay close with Robin after that. Because it feels like a punch in the face when a friend disregards how an ex treated you to get with them.

i’ve gotten multiple asks about this same post lmao, and yeah it kinda pissed me off too.

their initial point about how people that are anti r//nance think about how the ship would affect stobin by saying that we’re treating her like she’s steve’s ‘sidekick’? have they honestly never had a friend before?? what the fuck do you mean considering your friends feelings makes you their sidekick?

from my earliest anti r//nance posts, one of my points has been that steve dating tammy thompson would be beyond fucked up, and the only real equatable relationship to r//nance. because of robin’s history with tammy, and her projecting this hatred onto steve, robin would be entitled to feel however she wanted to feel about it.

and steve dating vickie, while still fucked up, is nowhere near the same as r//nance, let alone more fucked up. get serious.

nancy wasn’t just steve’s brief crush. she was steve’s girlfriend of a year that brutally broke his heart. steve still has relationship issues because of the end of that relationship and they’ve never had a real conversation about it. robin dating nancy isn’t the same as steve dating a crush, robin dating nancy is cruel. and betraying her best friend.

and yeah, i’ve never seen any solo vickie and steve content, i have seen steve and robin both dating vickie, which i think more often stems from the joke that no one will ever be able to date one half of stobin, because the other is always there lmao. but even the few posts i’ve seen have dived into how stobin would kinda struggle around their attraction to the same girl and the way they would work it out.

the difference between stobinickie and r//nance is that people shipping the former care about stobin, and people shipping the latter couldn’t give a fuck about them. they don’t care that steve is robin’s best friend, the first person she ever felt comfortable coming out to, the person she literally wants to combine into one being with.

besides that, r//nance makes up a significant potion of the fandom, whereas stobinickie is a crack ship known by about four people lmao. why would anyone be talking about it?

i don’t doubt that if i dated my friends ex, who he’s told me all about, and of which i know the details of their rough breakup, he would never speak to me again. and he would be well within his rights. how could he look at me knowing i was dating someone that hurt him. let alone diving into the complexities that he would be worried about me being hurt the same way.

even if stancy had ended positively, steve would be entitled to have feelings about his best friend, who he spends pretty much every second of the day with, dating his ex. but they didn’t end well!

you can ship r//nance, but don’t pretend that you give a fuck about robin and steve’s characters. robin and nancy have effectively become two hot barbies people are knocking together, with no real personalities.

[surpriserose]

we need more people to talk about how bad media literacy is and not for stupid fanfic reasons I mean like legit so many people are so incurious and susceptible to propaganda as well......if you look up anything about palestine right now youll see. Obviously its not just media illiteracy contributing to this its the racism ingrained in people from years of previous racist propaganda and they just keep feeding each other.

but if youre wondering who the hell is falling for the beheaded babies nonsense (besides the literal president) and the video game loot drop top secret plans with badly translated arabic and every single lie about hamas atrocities while israel actually commits worse atrocities with no criticism, its redditors its redditors all the way down. And lots of people get their news from reddit the same way they get it from tumblr or twitter or tiktok and thats not great obviously but thats...just whats happening. And none of them want to consider for a second, like everyone should if they havent realized this shit already, why theyre willing to fall hook line and sinker for israeli propaganda and constantly posting news from Israeli papers and the IDF ITSELF exclusively (with some american state news sources occasionally lol)

I cant tell you how many new stories on reddit are completely fabricated or just posting the israeli state line and how many of them are all posting shit israel is currently doing and blaming it on hamas. Israel had the power to shut off all the water in gaza because they already have that much control over Palestinian lives and then did it? Well hamas also fucked up the water pipes and used them for weapons (??????) Israel ordered a million people to evacuate gaza and started bombing evacuation routes? well actually its hamas stopping people and blocking evacution routes because uhhhhhh they want more people to die because uhhhhhh??????? and the proof is uhhhhh??? the IDF said so and they have no reason to lie i mean its not like theyre doing everything to genocide Palestinians in plain sight with imperialist backing and weapons and these are geniunely things ive all seen posted on reddit

idk why im posting this really like i guess i just want people to be more aware of the propaganda out there and be more willing to combat it on and offline when they recognize it and my god is it BLATANT right now and i hope im preaching to the choir right now but my god is it disheartening

Please donate to Palestinian aid if you can and if you dont know where to donate there are better posts than this for that but doctors without borders is in gaza right now

[glassprism]

the only time ive seen poto was in mid/late 2019 - it was the asian world tour. does this tour count as the "brilliant" original hal prince direction? or should i feel like a hypocrite by saying that ive seen the og staging haha

Listen, I know I'm one of those people who have been really touchy about what is or is not the "brilliant original", so I'm probably the last person who should say this. But I gotta say, the obsession I'm seeing with whether one has seen "the original" or not, here and on other places like Facebook, is getting kind of worrying. Like, you are not a better or worse phan for never seeing the original! You have not (hugely) missed out for not seeing the original! You are not a hypocrite for saying you saw it or didn't! Take it from someone who has only seen the restaged tour and Broadway post-changes: I'm not stressing about it, why should you?

Also, at this point, what counts as the "brilliant original" anyway? The show has had multiple changes over the years, and yes, that was before the COVID shutdown. By that standard, then the only way you could have seen the "original" was by viewing Japan pre-2019, because that's the only production that didn't include any changes for decades (and that's if you manage to get a theater where they didn't use the Pegasus statue - yes, that started in Japan for theaters that had too little space for the Golden Angel). Or what if it was directed by Hal Prince but had multiple changes anyway, like the Las Vegas production? What does that count as? Korea, meanwhile, is probably as "original" as productions can get, but it does have some altered 'Masquerade' choreography. Still the "original"?

Anyway, for the World Tour - there were some changes made to it, most notably the stationary Golden Angel statue and the flattened chandelier, lovingly nicknamed the "2delier". Are those technically changes? Yeah. Does it still count as the "brilliant original"? I dunno, maybe? Maybe not? Would anybody besides the most hardcore phan even notice the changes? Probably not! What do you say if people ask if you've seen the "original"? Just tell them you saw the World Tour. (If you want to be specific, say it's the 3rd World Tour or something.) Let them figure it out! Be the agent of confusion and chaos you've always aspired to become.

[whickerfurniture]

.· 👫 — 𝑹𝒖𝒃𝒚／𝑴𝒂𝒙𝒊𝒏𝒆 . ·

i.

Ruby refreshes Max's twitter at least twice a day. Sometimes, she posts vague things, just so Max will reply. She lives for seeing the notification come up, and can never let it sit for more than a minute. It's a dopamine rush, and then when it's over, she tweets something else. Theres usually a delay between Ruby's tweet and Max's reply, and she tries not to overthink it. Max is busy, she has friends. She does things. She exists, when Ruby isn't thinking of her. She might be the first person Ruby sees as an actual person, seperate to her wants and needs.

ii.

She has Max's address added to her Amazon account because Ruby does not care about the environment or worker conditions you cannot convince me that this rich bitch thinks about people under her so she uses Amazon religiously likes to be able to send things directly to Max's house. Stupid shit, too. Once, drunk, she sent a her new toilet seat. But she also sends snacks, and a hoodie she thought looked warm, or pretty notebooks. She also sent Max a Ring camera, because answering the door is dangerous. Ruby's never lived anywhere without a 24/7 doorman, how can Max feel safe without one?

iii.

Max reminds Ruby of her sister. Something in her smile, or the way she holds her shoulders. It's not all the time, but it's enough to steal Ruby's breath when she realises it. She spends a whole week avoiding her, no contact at all. Because it feels like a betrayal, in a way she can't really describe. It's not even that Stephanie would be mad, if anything she'd love Max as much as Ruby. She'd be happy her sister had a friend. Of course, Ruby never really thought she'd be able to stay away from Max, not longterm. She lies, and says she had to fly home, a family emergency. Can't say anything else, I'm sure you understand, right? She decides she's just not going to think about it.

iv.

She likes Max's friends, at least as far as she's aware. It's a complicated web, and she's not even sure she wants to be a part of it, even superficially, but none of them had been outright cruel to her, so she can't judge. They make inside jokes she doesn't really understand, and reference movies she hasn't seen. And Max looks different, when she's with them. Not worse, not better, just different. Maybe, deep down, she's a little jealous of them, the way they all connect.

v.

She reads everything about Jimmy, about what happened. She sees the forum posts, and the news reports, when she googles Max's name one day. Not much of it makes sense to her, but she reads it anyway. It puts some of Max into context, makes other parts more confusing. There's two opposing sides, and they're so fundamentally different, it's hard to believe they exist in the same universe, in the same girl. She spends a whole night at her computer, flitting from this site to the next, dying to ask Max what really happened. Because if it happened the way they're saying... Well, she never pegged her friend for a bully, even by association. Max seemed too good for that, too kind. And Ruby knew the type. She'd never exactly been Miss Congeniality, making or breaking girl's popularity at her private school with a flick of her wrist... But no one got hurt. This was a different level.

Could she even ask about it, without being nosy? Not really. It wasn't her business. She wipes her browser history, as though that means it never happened. Jimmy even sounded like he forgave her, so what right did she have to judge? Besides, she was no saint. She texts Max, asks her if she wants to hang out. She didn't need to think about it. Max was her friend, and being friends means seeing the worst in someone, and deciding you love them anyway. And Ruby did love Max.

[attink]

ive had some weird dreams about my assaulter and his girlfriend recently. i think because april 30th of last year was the day i found out about everything, and my brain goes crazy about that sort of thing.

about a week ago i dreamt that i got a notification on my phone that said ***** ****** is coming to visit you! and i got extremely freaked out. my case didn’t go anywhere and there is no no-contact order, but he did visit my workplace on purpose after i found everything out, and had planned on transferring to my college at some point. after the police, though, he seems to be staying away from me, and only his girlfriend started showing up to my job (to walk around, buy nothing, look at me, and leave) I’m afraid of having no safe space. and i’m afraid that he’ll realize i can’t do much if he decides to come around where i work. sometimes, in a very fleeting way, im scared that he’ll want to come find me. the dream ended very shortly with me freaking out and looking out my windows for his car.

I can explain myself more with this next dream. Later, i dreamt that I was looking through my easter photos, only they weren’t mine, they were my assaulter’s girlfriend’s photos. I kept looking, scared that i would see his face in them, but i didn’t. Weird, right? This is the girl that my assaulter was with before me, and after me, (and truthfully i’m not sure if they’re still together but frankly i don’t care). In our own relationship he assaulted me several times. After the breakup, she asked me if he had r*ped me. I told her what happened to me (none of which i truly consider r*pe) and she told me the reason why she asked. for months i minimized my pain because she had gone through worse. in literally every way he treated me wrong, she got it worse. I felt sorry for her, i didnt hate her, and i compared my own pain to hers. Eventually, while i still had a case, i had to explain why i didn’t go to the cops immediately for mine. (i hoped it was an accident. him being a repeat assaulter changed my view)… then i got the “hate mail”, as i put it. it was from her, telling me how disgusting i was for butting into their lives, and how i should mind my business and move on. how i was petty, pathetic, delusional, and she pitied anybody who ever had the misfortune of coming into my life (her words, my friends and i would later laugh over this). So essentially this girl defended our assaulter to me after i tried to get some justice/at least make sure there was a record so he wouldn’t try to do that again. for months she came to my workplace (the word “stalk” has been used and that freaks me out) but luckily i haven’t seen him in almost a year and her in half.

and then.. last nights dream. I was sitting in some sort of class or church and lo and behold, this girl is sitting next to me. I ignore her, she ignores me, perfect. then somehow we’re away from everyone having a verbal argument. I don’t remember what she said, i just remember saying “you know what? its okay that you didn’t tell anyone or get help. I didn’t. Not until i knew what happened to you. im just trying to make sure it doesn’t happen again to anyone else, not even you. It’s like we said on the phone, whoever ends up with him will have to deal with this for the rest of their life.”

and then.. she was crying. In a perfect world, she’d get away from this guy and find someone decent. see that he’s not worth it. But as far as i know, there’s a girl out there still dating her assaulter and feeling fine that she told his other victim to fuck right off. I don’t think about it much, because its none of my business what two bad people are doing together, but i am frequently glad that im the one who’s not in the picture anymore.

there is no real point to this post besides reflecting on this stuff and reminding myself why i might be dreaming about my assaulter and some girl. i feel like if i didn’t, my brain would convince me that dreaming about people who hurt me isn’t natural

[gontagokuhara]

2019 vs. 2024 hot takes exactly 0 people asked for (now with opinions on the dr3 characters!)

and because im mentally ill im elaborating below the cut because at least i’m cognizant of how few people share this illness with me ❤️

first of all. some categories were edited (+added). we shall address them all in due time 🫶 but just for posterity before we begin: top of the category is the one that best exemplifies the category title and it moves in descending order; so as gonta is my #1 my GOAT, pedo udg guy is the one i want to kill himself most. understandable? ok 🫶

2019 top 5-tier is slightly unfortunately named but other than that changes in 2024 are somewhat minimal. as is perhaps obvious if you have seen even one (1) danganronpa post from me: gonta is My character hes mine spike chunsoft dont get him like i do. AND i love sdr2. nagito is my very very close second i am so incredibly mentally ill about him Oh if you all could see the hundreds of thousands of words ive written about that fucking guy. also true of hajime. still true of sonia (<3 i love u girlie) and fuyuhiko but to a lesser extent (i have written so much sdr2. its a problem. we persist). they are characters we see a lot of and in that same vein give SO much to build upon in further character exploration. and boy do i do that. holds the five of them In my arms i love you babygirls

S tier excellents again prove i am an sdr2 enjoyer. i think it also showcases how much i REALLY love the v3 characters while absolutely hating the plot they were stuck in. kaede and shuuichi are SOOOO special 2 me u dont understand…….im going to have so many thoughts and be So mad when i replay v3. kokichi is VERY interesting and my thoughts on him are endless (hi evan) and there is soooo much there even if i also have to fundamentally hate him somewhat because of 3-4. also a wide array of sdr2 characters are here of course……on my most recent replay i have come to really appreciate imposter (better sexier byakuya ❤️) and ibuki . and i was kind of surprised how high some of the dr1 characters are (besides chihiro who has consistently been my dr1 #1) but sorry dr3 made me love the makoto/kyouko/aoi trio sooooo bad.

lots of variety in the A tier which are all characters i enjoy, they just arent my Favorite barbie dolls to mash around u know. so many very unique personalities like mahiru, angie, tenko, and ryoma that weren’t explored as well as possible in canon, so its harder for me to personally invest in them. junko is iconic and she gets worse as the games go on but god. dr1 was craaaaaazy so she and mukuro have to be given props for that. im ignoring e-girl junko and v3 entirely <3 also again in watching dr3 while replaying sdr2 i really came to appreciate natsumi and her dynamic with hajime :[ rip girl i miss u. also also i liked koichi way more than expected LOL it must just be cuz hes hot but his death was sick as fuck and i liked his thruline with jin (the weird flirting with kyouko aside……)

B tier! bit of a mixed bag, from characters i like very begrudgingly (byakuya, sorry, i latched onto him as my rich terrible boyfriend when first playing years ago and the fondness kinda stuck 💔) to ones i do genuinely like, but they were not given much to do in canon (ryota) or their arcs fell flat (kirumi). also here are dr3 + udg characters i didnt mind or were just somewhat nice to makoto (also chisa, who is very interesting but i very much disliked how her character ended off) so shout out them (they are all dead) (or orphaned like monaca and kotoko).

C tier is basically my ‘i barely remember’ tier sry……i did not finish udg so i have so very few opinions on most of the characters. chihiro aoi and yasuhiro’s parents are chill tho shout out. not much to say tho

and now we enter the hater zone with D tier……look. some of these are hot takes and some arent. as much as i love sdr2 i just cannot ever make myself like hiyoko and teruteru. theyre kinda fucked from the getgo theyre never treated as especially serious characters but their glaring flaws are so bad i cant bring myself to care when the rest of the cast is SO GOOD. i also do not like kazuichi LMFAO as a sonia ride or die just as i cannot look past teruteru’s sexual harassment NEITHER CAN I LOOK PAST KAZUICHI’S ‼️‼️ yes i think he can be fixed but sonia needs a restraining order + when she was hoping he was the ch4 killer i was cheering. everyone else this category are just mid ass dr1 characters and the dr3 characters i found actively annoying. also monokuma. hes cringe but iconic and doesnt fit anywhere else

not much to be said about F tier. i did not finish udg but i know enough that i need haiji towa to die. i need the asshole who beat up hajime to die. i need the asshole who tried to kill makoto to die. i need that stupid old fuck heading the future foundation to die. the monokubs are fucking annoying. the only like Real characters here are 1) miu because she is written terribly and her cool talent is wasted, treats gonta like shit, isnt funny, is just nasty perv bait and her most meaningful contribution is to be fodder for the 2nd worse written case in the game. and as for NUMBER ONE WORST: tsumugi mostly just symbolizes my hatred for v3’s ending because outside of her role in 3-6 she has very little impact on the story before her reveal. also got my girlies kaede and rantarou killed God i hate the end of thisgame

and finally: oh my poor sweet bastards. why would they do this to you. these characters are either underutilized in a way that is DEVASTATING (izuru 💔) treated like shit as joke characters their potential is totally squandered by dogshit writing (everyone else — sdr2 you could have been so much better WHY!!!!!!). mikan and korekiyo’s motives are dogshit and make the ch3 double murder so much weaker. nekomaru and akane are played as jokes essentially their entire screentime and akane is especially egregious because shes a survivor among characters like FUYUHIKO!!! like SONIA!!! like HAJIME!!!!!!!!! AND YOU SQUANDER HER LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!! kaito suffers from really flip-floppy writing and he sucks a lot of the time Especially pre-localization but ive adopted him a little bit in writing him and i love my construction of him in my brain.

ok thats it. im so mentally ill. give me ur thoughts or do the tierlist urself. now pointy objects lockdown time 👍

[cherryyharryy]

i have an idea for a request (it’s totally ok if you don’t want to do it) like an angst-> fluff where one of harry’s songs accidentally gets leaked bc of y/n like she has something on a flash drive and the song is on another and they get mixed up and obviously he’s really mad at y/n and they have a fight he’s super snappy with her but something happens to her like she gets into a really big accidental or something and he forgives her bc he cares about her more tha the leaked song

WC: 2.7k

***

Damage control wasn’t even an option. 

Y/n sat there, staring at Harry’s laptop, numb to everything except the blaring desire to go back in time just two minutes. Two minutes is all she would need to undo possibly the biggest screwup of her life.

And the worst part is that this mistake ultimately doesn’t affect her. At least not in comparison to how it will affect Harry. And his band. And his team. Basically everyone involved with his career. 

Her mind is equally begging for her to shut down and come up with a plan—an excuse—something, Is there anyway this wasn’t my fault?  

She checks the time, her heart sinking to her stomach when she realizes Harry and his team will be back any minute. Any minute and she’s done for.

They’ve only been together for five months, officially. She’s still new to most everyone. She’s that girl Harry’s dating.

“I told you he played in that movie.” Jeff’s voice echoes outside the studio. Y/n closes the laptop and prays for strength. 

“I have him confused with someone else.” Harry bustles through the door, a small crowd of people filing in behind him, back to the spots they left an hour ago. “Hey darling,” he greets, “finish your paper?”

Y/n’s frozen, morbidly wishing he had found out about his song leaking on his own so she wouldn’t have to tell him. “Uh, almost.”

He kisses the top of her head and hands her a cup of frozen yogurt. “Your favorite.” 

“Thanks.” She sets it on the table she’s sat at while Harry pulls up a chair beside her. “Aren’t you guys still working?”

He waves in the direction of his band, “Mitch’s gotta fix his guitar.” He snickers, and slides his laptop out from under y/n’s hands. “Had a bit of an accident in the car.” 

Y/n’s head tingles with what must be nerve damage, her place in this world, her place in this room, decreasing in value as Harry opens his computer.

“It’s gonna melt.” He nods to her yogurt.

“I’m not hungry.”

He furrows his brow. “You alright?”

“Mhm.” She looks around the room, everyone busy getting back to work, light chatter passing among them. “Uh, actually, I uh, I have to tell you something.” Y/n tries to swallow the lump in her throat with no luck.

“Okay…” He shuts the laptop and gives her his full attention.

“Okay, um—”

“What the fuck!?” The room freezes as everyone turns toward Jeff. “Harry someone’s got a hold of your song!” 

Harry scrambles to his manager, complete shock on his face as they both stare down at Jeff’s phone. “Fuck.” They start to play a video, the sound of a girl screaming, with Harry’s unconsented voice playing in the background, fills the room. “How the hell did this happen?” He’s gritting through his teeth, neck red, veins bulging in his hands as he rips the phone out of Jeff’s hand. “HOW? Someone answer me!”

Y/N considers keeping quiet. Playing innocent. What good will it do to confess anyway? It’s not like it’ll undo what she’s done.

Sarah chimes in from across the room, “It looks like it happened half an hour ago. That’s when this video I’m looking at was posted.”

Y/n’s staring down at her lap, holding her head up with her fingers pressed into her temples when Harry slings himself back into the chair next to her.

“All that work, all that fucking work,” he nearly growls, “for some cunt to spread my unfinished song around for a buck.”

Y/n peers up to the room, a completely different picture compared to five minutes ago. Now there’s talk of lawyers and pressing charges while everyone shuffles around. Jeff slams the door as he steps out with his phone to his ear, and y/n knows she can’t claim denial, it’ll only make things worse.

“Uh, Harry?”

“What is it?” He doesn’t look at her, eyes glaring at his phone while another video plays of a group of people reacting to his song. “Glad they fucking like it.”

“Harry?”

“What, y/n?”

She shrinks under his gaze, mouth dry as she forces her confession out. “I uh, this is all my fault.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m so, so sorry. And I’ll do anything—I know I can’t fix it—but...”

Harry’s tongue presses against the inside of his cheek, his eyes narrowing in on her as a morbid silence forms a little bubble around them. “Go on,” he whispers with grit, “finish what you were gonna say.”

She stutters, desperately trying to figure him out. “I’m just sorry. It was an accident.”

“An accident? How did you even manage to do this?”

“I—”

“Do you have any idea what this accident means, y/n?”

She reluctantly shakes her head no.

“How the fuck did you do this?”

“I—I don’t know...I was taking a break from my paper, and, I don’t know Harry.” She’s in tears now, warm and salty as they spill down her cheeks. Her mouth wobbles around another apology, but no sounds make it out.

“Fix it.”

“What?”

He stands up, yanking his laptop off the table, pausing to glare at her one last time. “I said, to fix it.” With that he storms across the room, slinging the door open just as Jeff reenters.

“Harry, your attorney—”

“Forget it.” He turns around and points his phone towards y/n silently sobbing in the corner. “She’s gonna handle it.” He takes one step out into the hall and stops, spinning on his heels to face the studio. “Don’t speak to me until you do.”

Mitch’s guitar that was fixed and propped against the wall, crashes to the floor when Harry slams the door. 

Chatter passes around the room one more time, only now everyone seems to be in agreeance—that girl never should have been allowed in the studio, and maybe, Harry should break up with her.

***

Early morning rain fell outside Harry’s apartment. It was still dark, street lamps burning through the fog in the city below. His home fills with coffee as he pours his fifth cup; the prior four never offering more than a few sips before he had abandoned them somewhere, the counter, mantle, bookshelf, because he can’t talk without his hands.

Y/n sits on his couch. It’s velvet and pink and too big for one person. She hated it the first time he invited her over. If he breaks up with her, she’s going to tell him how ugly it is.

“I don’t know what you expect me to do.” She’s exhausted. She hadn’t hesitated to drive over when he finally responded to one of her hundreds of texts in the week since the mishap. But now she regrets it. They’ve been going in circles with the same argument for the past four hours. She’s convinced he invited her over just to be mean. She sighs, rubbing her temples. “I said I was sorry. You know that I’m sorry. And you know that I never, ever in a million years, would have done something like this on purpose.”

“I’m allowed to be angry with you. I have every right to be.”

“Do you, though?” She straightens up on his ugly couch and looks at him leaning against the doorframe that leads into the kitchen. “Aren’t you a little tired of hating me? God Harry, everyone else in the whole world has moved on except you.”

“It’s not everyone else’s song, is it? It’s not everyone else’s months and months of hard work. It’s not everyone else’s unfinished art? Nobody else is having to deal with a girlfriend that is so careless, so thoughtless, that she actually managed to leak my song!”

“Stop raising your voice at me!”

“You had no business snooping around my computer anyway! I told you you could work on your fucking paper, not to go prying around my personal shit!”

“You know what,” she scoffs, shooting up off the couch, “this argument is so pointless. You didn’t want me here so we could talk. You just wanted to torture me because you’re mad that people don’t love your stupid song.”

“What the fuck did you say?”

She brushes his shoulder as she passes by him, and a drip of his coffee spills onto his hand. He curses, and follows her into the kitchen where he lays his final cup down on the island.

“You’re being a baby because people aren’t fawning over you like they usually do.” She shrugs and slings her bag over her shoulder. “It’s not your best song, Harry.”

The veins in his neck strain against his flaming skin. His cheeks are sucked in, and if he bites down on the skin any harder he’ll puncture his face. “Get the fuck out.”

“I was already leaving, dumb ass.” She strides by him once more, practically feeling the heat steaming off his body. When she gets to the front door, she pauses with her hand on the knob. “Your couch is hideous, by the way. Just because you’re rich doesn’t mean you have to buy shitty looking stuff.”

When she slams the door behind her, the apartment shakes, and cold coffee spills from each cup.

***

It’s nearing five a.m. when y/n backs out of the complex. Her wipers race across the windshield, but do nothing against the downpour wreaking havoc in the city. She does her best to stay on what she assumes is her side of the road, swerving to the right each time headlights blind her.

“Shit.” Nothing is open, and she can’t even see where it would be safe to pull over to let the rain pass. But her home isn’t that far, and traffic isn’t too bad. 

She comes to a stop at a red light, only to realize she missed a left turn she should’ve made a minute ago. “Damn it. Fucking hell.”

As soon as the light turns green, she spins the wheel to make a U-turn, and if it hadn’t been for the rain, and her own clouded mind, and Harry’s voice echoing in her ears, she might have seen the truck who didn’t even try to avoid her.

***

It’s the headache from hell that wakes her up. And it’s the sterile smell of hospital that jogs her memory. And it’s a nurse not much older than y/n that says something about you’re lucky to be alive. 

She’s poked and prodded and asked a thousand questions before her IV is adjusted and a pill to ease one of the many pains scratching her body is handed to her in a small plastic cup. A police officer repeats half of this process, and somewhere in the mess of her reality, she learns that the other driver was sending a text to his wife when he plowed into her car. He’s at home and she’s here. Lucky to be alive.

She made calls to her mom and friends, and even managed to type out a decent email to her professors for her upcoming absence in class.

When she automatically pulled up Harry’s name on her phone, the last text he sent, the one inviting her over so he could make her more miserable than she already was, sat there in all its taunting glory.

What is she even supposed to say? Hey, I know you hate my existence right now, but I’m lying here in a hospital bed with bandages wrapped around my head. It’d be cool if you stopped by.

It’s not long before the sun pops up and reminds y/n of just how early it is. The clouds part, and it’s like it had never even rained, like it had never even been dark for hours, and if she closes her eyes, y/n can pretend that the past week hadn’t even happened.

***

 “How are you feeling today?” The nurse checks y/n’s IV, humming after her question.

“Just sore. Ready to get out of here.”

“We’ve started the paperwork, so shouldn’t be too long. Who’s coming to get you?”

Y/n blinks, feeling stupid she hadn’t thought this far ahead. She doesn’t even have a car anymore. The nurse looks over the computer monitor, waiting for a response.

“Uh, my friend.”

“Awesome. Dr. Kirby has to come check on you one last time before you leave. I’ll go see if he can stop by now, if you want to let your friend know.”

As soon as the nurse is out the door, y/n scrambles to turn her phone back on, and once it is, her lock screen is filled with missed calls and unanswered texts.

She’ll respond later; gives her something to do in the car to occupy her in front of Harry. 

She can’t call him. Harry’s not a monster, although the past week doesn’t exactly prove her case, but she knows he wouldn’t refuse to come get her. If anything, he’ll be annoyed she didn’t tell him about the accident sooner. But she’s too emotional to deal with hearing his voice.

She types out a text recounting her last 24 hours, along with the name of the hospital. He immediately reads it, and a moment later he’s trying to call.

To: Harry

I’m too tired to talk rn

She lies. And it works.

From: Harry

I’ll be there as fast as i can

***

“Baby?”

Y/n cracks her eyes open, irritated she never quite fell asleep. Confused as to why Harry’s calling her baby. Angry that she cares. And the next words out of his mouth are ones she’d been predicting.

“Why didn’t you call me? I would’ve dropped everything. You’ve been here all alone, shit. Are you okay? What hurts?”

He’s hovering over her, fidgeting, unsure if he can touch her.

“I’m fine now. Just sore. And tired.”

“Fuck I can’t believe this, I—”

“The doctor already said I can go. I’m not allowed to walk out on my own, so, you need to let the nurse know you’re here. She’ll take me down in a wheelchair.”

“Baby I’m so sorry-”

“No, Harry. You would still be busy hating my guts right now—”

“Hate you? I don’t hate you?”

“Well you did a great job this week making me feel otherwise.”

Harry sighs, gripping the bed frame and dropping his chin to his chest. When he looks back up he has tears brimming his eyes. “I’m sorry,” his voice cracks. “I know I’ve been an ass this week. I—you were right. I took out my anger from no one lovin’ the song on you.”

“Well it’s not no one. A lot of people did. And it’s unfinished anyway. You wouldn’t enjoy a meal if it was only cooked halfway.”

He nods, but y/n knows he’s only accepting her words because of the situation.

“You mean so much more to me than a leaked song. I’m sorry I treated you like shit. And that I—I made you think I hated you. You have every right to hate me.”

“You annoy the hell out of me, but I don’t hate you.”

His lips twitch, but a few tears slide down his cheeks. “I’m sorry.”

“I know.” She takes his hand off the rail and smoothes her thumb across his knuckles. “You can make it up to me by getting me out of here.”

“I can do that.” He kisses the top of her head and hits the remote to call for the nurse.

“You can really kiss me, y’know. I’m not gonna break.”

He’s hesitant, but slowly lowers his head to press his lips to hers. He’s timid, and his lips are still damp from tears, but it’s more relieving than either of them would ever admit.

The nurse ends their moment when she pops in the room, pushing a wheelchair in front of her. “Hi, you must be y/n’s friend.”

“Friend?” He peers down at y/n, suggestion lacing the word. “Care to explain?”

“Not really, I’m so tired.”

“Mhm.” He clicks his tongue, supporting her arm as she swings her legs off the bed. Once she’s standing and steady, he tucks her hair behind her ear and bends down so his mouth can graze her lobe. “Since we’re just friends, I guess you’ll have to sleep on my ugly couch.”