#bi hakoda

[hey-whats-the-holdup]

I know “bi Sokka” is a popular hc, and so is bi Hakoda (bc of Bato) but just let me suggest this: Kya and Katara are bi too. Maybe even Kanna. The whole fuckin family is just filled with bisexuals. Aang, who is pansexual and was raised by monks who taught him that love comes in all shapes and forms, doesn’t even know what homophobia is. Tenzin has to come out to his family as heterosexual

[joodeegemstone]

obsessed with sokka thinking that hakoda is homophobic, but actually he is fully cool with sokka being with a guy, just not the fire lord.

[chaotic-tired-bastard]

Did anyone ask for more of the Selkie! Bato AU? No? Too bad

[theduckeminence]

[ id: Hakoda, from the hips and up, is shown giving a toothy beam and a wink to the viewer. He holds up an approving thumbs up while his right hand rested on his hip. He wears a black shirt and in text says “I’m Proud of my Bi-Legends”, which was in the the bi pride flag colors. He wears a homemade bisexual bracelet on his right hand. Behind him, his kids peek behind him from head to chest. On the right, Sokka looks up—wearing a yellow-white spider patterned button up. His earrings were bi-colored while the transgender flag was painted on his cheek. On the left, Katara also smiles politely at the viewer with a wink. She wore a blue-and-white-striped jacket with a pink top underneath. Her earrings were in pastel bi colors while the transgender flag was also painted on her cheek. End of id.]

@avatar-pride-month with First Pride/Bisexual: Hakoda and his kids <3 (Consider this being Hakoda’s first proper pride with his kids).

[thegaybluejay]

As a multi-shipper and an ATLA fan, this is my favorite thing to think about-

Zuko: Hey, Hakoda. Um…would you help me make a Water Tribe engagement necklace? I think it’s tradition to ask the parent of the person you intend to marry, right?

Hakoda, blinking in surprise: Oh. Um. Yes, it is. Sure, son. I’ll help.

Hakoda, internally: WHICH KID OF MINE IS HE DATING?? IS HE EVEN GAY? SOKKA’S BI BUT MAYBE ZUKO IS STRAIGHT?? HE SEEMS CLOSE TO BOTH OF THEM SO WHAT IS HAPPENING??

Lmao listen, Zukka has my HEART and will forever be my fav, but I can get behind Zutara too (as long as y’all don’t hate on Aang) and this dynamic is so funny to me😂I think someone wrote a fic about it once-

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

i've always thought bato/hakoda/kya couldn't have happened in the canon timeline bc sokka would be way less fucked up about gender if he knew his dad was bi but i just remembered that mostly-mundane-atla's posts mentioning polygamous marriages in inupiat culture describe it more as two men providing for the same wife & kids than a modern polyamory situation and that could totally work. like if it wasn't a fluid-roles romantic arrangement and more just "these are kya's two husbands supporting her kids" sokka could still develop certain ideas of men's and women's roles and we'd get to have the convenient explanation for why bato felt comfortable stepping up as the kids' dad.

and then there's the juicy dynamic of bato and hakoda not dating but being co-husbands who are supposed to be close and spend a lot of time together. like they don't have to be anything but close friends but being married to the same woman raises the possibility, doesn't it? and maybe kya asked bato to be her second husband because she knew he was gay and in love with hakoda and kept sending them off to do errands for the family with a wink and a twinkle in her eye. did they know what she meant? did they ever do anything while she was alive? or did they only realize years later, after her death had destabilized their little family unit and then fighting in the war brought the two of them back together? did hakoda bolt awake in the middle of the night three years post-canon like "i'm such a FUCKING idiot i could have been dating you the whole time" and bato was like "yeah probably. i love you go back to sleep"

[linnoya-writes]

Aang actually *was* a Terrible Dad (and we should stop making excuses for him).

One thing I cannot get over is how people say that Aang actually wasn't that terrible of a father, and I keep hearing the same excuses to his behavior: he didn't grow up with conventional parents, he had to focus on bringing back his air-bending culture, Katara was already a natural parent and was totally okay being the housewife/mom who let Aang off the hook with most of the serious parenting duties... ugh....

Anyway, I have three points to give:

1) Aang may not have grown up with conventional family structure, but he certainly knew enough about the world (being a nomad his whole life pre-war) to understand what a healthy family dynamic looked like. He knew enough about Toph's dad and Zuko's dad to understand what a poor father figure looked like. Aang also spent time with Hakoda, in ATLA season 3, to see the characteristics of a good father -- and this doesn't even include the time he spent traveling with Sokka/Katara alone and noticing how their dad's absence was affecting them. I put a lot of emphasis on Katara, here, because she makes it very clear in Season 3 that her father leaving the family was devastating... and this girl would want a partner who understood those feelings and do absolutely everything to keep the family together. It's what she did throughout the entirety of ATLA-- Katara was the glue that kept everyone close -- and you would think Aang would pick up on those cues, rather than let history repeat itself after he had his family with Katara. Imagine how awful it must've been for Katara, watching the man she married ultimately go off with their air-bending son on these cultural excursions, and not even consider that their two other kids might want to learn about air bending culture anyway. They're a bi-cultural family, after all, right? Wouldn't that have been a prime example for the new world, showing a blended family being together and not separate? Just let that sink in for a moment.

2) Many people say that any misunderstood family dynamics between Kya, Bumi and Tenzin came to a peaceful conclusion in LOK season 2 with a happy family portrait. Here's the thing-- a posed, smiling family portrait doesn't necessarily indicate a healthy family unit. I'm also making note of LOK Season 3, when Bumi admits that he finally feels more connected to their father after he magically gets Airbending, and also that scene when Kya/Bumi arrive to the Northern Air Temple and the acolytes are shocked to hear that Avatar Aang had other children besides Tenzin. I mean... how much effort would it take, exactly, for Aang to just mention to the temple monks and acolytes that he had two other kids? Was he embarrassed to tell them they weren't air benders? Was he ashamed? In any case, he was the Avatar and he should've demonstrated pride for the children he had regardless of their bending ability or lack their-of. It goes without saying that, while Aang did grow up differently and had many priorities being the Avatar and the Last Airbender... he still made some conscious choices about how little of a "family man" he wanted to be. Aang clearly favored the air-bending life and didn't process that he was also raising a family that was part WaterTribe (perhaps because many of their customs clashed with his air-bending way of life... but that's another conversation.)

3) Yes, Bryke are notorious for writing examples of poor father figures (Ozai/Unalaq/BeiFong/Yakone/Hiroshi) and I'm also here to tell you that they're known for writing women who lose agency and turn devoted-doting-domestic-docile once they get with their man. Pema from LOK is a good example-- all we know about her is she literally gave her life to be an air-acolyte and carry Tenzin's children (the only backstory we get is Pema secretly pined for Tenzin until it became too much and she had to say something), and be the good housewife and mother to those air bending kids. We know nothing about this woman's individual wants or needs outside of motherhood. Another example is the backstory of Yakone and his unnamed wife who-- after giving this man two sons, completely disappears from the narrative and is not aware Yakone is abusing his kids. And she's still exists, because Amon refuses to go with Noatak so as to not abandon their mom. Their mother was so unnecessary as a character after she had the kids, she became this oblivious/silent character in the background who let her own kids get abused. Another example is Unalaq's wife-- again, about a father using his two kids like his henchmen and the mother isn't even in the picture. We know she exists because after Unalaq gets destroyed... Esna turns to Desca and says "what're we gonna tell Mother?"  It may have been written as a subtle joke... but the underlying sentiment is still there.

I'd say my favorite example is the fate of Fire Lady Ursa-- a woman once determined to protect her children that she was willing to commit murder and treason -- ends up choosing to forget those same children and instead wipes all her memories of them entirely to start a quiet domestic life with her childhood sweetheart, a man who very much knows the life Ursa left behind and has the power to decide what truths he wants to tell her about the world and live like there wasn't even a bloody war happening. (Don't even get me started on how The Search disappointed me. Oy).

Perhaps Aang and Katara -- even without intent -- might have fallen into that formulaic pattern when Bryke wrote out the first two seasons of LOK, because that was during the time The Promise, The Search and The Rift comics got published, and Katara's character was definitely becoming that unquestionably-loyal/no fuss/devoted girlfriend to Aang where she would go with everything he decided and sadly sit in a corner while Aang got all the praise and attention and never considering her feelings. Bryke picked up on these mistakes, however, because in the later comics like North & South and Imbalance, you can see them giving Katara some leadership moments (particularly when Aang isn't around) and Aang more of a mature, considerate approach with Katara, saying things like "I'm sorry I just left you to fight alone like that!" and "You're always asking me if I'm okay. Now it's my turn-- are you okay?"  The effort was definitely there to make Aang and Katara look somewhat more compatible than they let on. But things didn't really seem that promising in Legend of Korra... as Katara's character arc gets breadcrumbs of acknowledgement regarding what she did for the world outside of Aang's narrative.

It seems like Katara's badass individual characteristics were written second only to whatever she needed to be for Aang, including being the primary parent to his non-airbender kids while he focused on the air-bending culture.

In any case-- I'm almost certain Bryke will be bending over backwards to "fix" all of these flawed elements of Kataang and Aang as a father figure in the upcoming animated feature films, because if there's anything Bryke likes to do... it is "tell" us that Aang was a great guy and there absolutely was no other better person for Katara.

[that-disabled-princess]

Fic Reader Highlights from this year! Thanks @mostlymaudlin for putting this together! This is such a lovely idea.

Fic that made me laugh: Worst Disney Princess Ever by @hushed-chorus.

So technically I listened to Demi read this in the discord, but who's counting. This is such a cute and fun fic in the absolute best way. The pigeons! The undead plotting rats! Baz's resignation to being the Disney princess with his undead animals 😂 Demi, hearing you read this was my first time reading (or listening) to this fic, and it was INCREDIBLE.

Fic that made me cry: you never quite say (but i hear) by @that-was-anticlimactic.

Yeah, this fic made me sob. It reminded me so much of my best friend, who also has ADHD and a loud voice and loves talking about their special interests. I adore them so much and love listening to them talk, even if I don't really get DND. I remember immediately sending them this fic after reading it. This is such a special fic. I absolutely adore it, and Zuko is the best boyfriend.

Honorary mention to He's Cruel But You Don't Have to Be by notanotherfanficwriter. Definitely made me cry. Soren's character arc, especially in Finnegrin's Wake, is incredibly cathartic.

Fic that gave me a story hangover: None Of Those Tiny Fluff Monsters In The House by @roxan1930.

Whatever a story hangover is, this definitely gave me it. I ended up naming one of my micropets in the Finch self-care app Poof because of it. I sometimes go back and reread parts of it because it's just That good and fun.

Fic I want to discuss book-club style: The Gay Bar by @scone-lover.

I think the Carry On discord actually has discussed this one before! It was very very lovely. Both the discussion and the fic. I ended up making a cover of this fic. The fic is so lovely and a very real depiction of queer experiences. Sconey, you are a gift to this fandom.

Fic that got me a lil flustered: Symbiotic by @thrandilf.

Um, yes. Hello. I am very very bisexual for a slutty gay practically-a-god elf tying up another slutty gay pretty-much-a-vampire elf and letting her drink from him. Thank you.

Fic by one of my favorite authors: Blooming by @hoothalcyon.

If you only read one neurodivergent ruthari fic, read this one. It's a collection of oneshots with autistic Runaan and supportive husband Ethari, and is so SO sweet and wonderful. Each chapter is a little slice of warmth and happiness to cut through the difficulties of life. And it's just so lovely seeing autistic adults being written about.

Fic I reread more than once: Keep You Safe by Tragicomic_Warrior_Poet

Just... Hakoda being a good dad to Zuko. Yeah. I love seeing that in zukka fics. I come back to reread this one a lot. Hakoda is such a good dad, and you can definitely tell how much he loves his kids. (And how much he cares about Zuko.)

Fic I sent to everyone I know: On the Edge of Morning by LassieLowrider

I love seeing the Carry On characters being disabled. I don't agree with Baz's leg being healed, and I really wish Simon being neurodivergent was touched on more in the books. So you better believe I sent this to the Carry On discord when I found it! It's such a wonderful slice of life fic <22

Fic that made me fall in love with an author: how familiar the danger by LiterallyThePresident (so sad I don't know if this author has a Tumblr)

So cheating a bit by doing a series for this one. But eh, rules were made to be bended. This series is SO DAMN GOOD. GO READ IT. AND THERE'S ART BY @sefarlen!!! Knight Ambrosius helping out slutty flirtatious commoner Ballister and them having an enemies to reluctant/tentative allies to lovers? FUCK YEAH, SIGN ME UP.

Gonna go ahead and tag some folks if you're interested in participating! Tagging everyone who's tagged above plus @bazzybelle @stitchyqueer @valeffelees @imagineacoolusername @artsyunderstudy @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @theearlgreymage @confused-bi-queer @no-cinnamon-for-synonym @yeonjunenby @yurayuramiharin @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @youarenevertooold @carryonsimoncarryonbaz @beautifulterriblequeen @cutestkilla @wellbelesbian @nightimedreamersworld @iamamythologicalcreature and anyone else who wants to! 💖💖

The blank templates 😊

[waterfire1848]

Hi @waterfire1848 ! How’s its going?

I just had a thought regarding are earlier conversation with Azutara and Zukka coming out to their parents. You mentioned that you head cannoned both Kya and Hakoda as Bi. Which gave me an idea

In a modern AU we’re we have both “alive Kya” and “good Ozai” (or at least somewhat decent) .

So what if in a modern Au, what if Ozai, Ursa, Hakoda, and Kya, don’t approve approve of Azutara or Zukka. Not because of simple-minded homophobia or other thoughts of that ilk. But because Ozai, Ursa, Kya, and and Hakoda are all Bisexual and are a swingers couple. With the Water/Fire parents exclusively being open with each other alone.

So they disapprove of their child (Azutara and Zukka) SO (significant other) because of how awkward the whole thing is to them. Since both sets of the Water/Fire sibs are together.

I believe that all four would eventually get over the awkwardness factor and accept the relationship joyfully. But would probably keep their own secret to the grave.

Just Imagine the horror though, if in the future when Azutara/Zukka are married with children of their own, they learn that all four of their parents used to “knock boots” as it were.

Hello @745voiceofthepeople ! It’s going well! How are you doing?

I cannot put into words how much I love this idea and how much it made me laugh🤣🤣🤣! This is hilarious!

The four know the other two have kids and they go to the same school but it's not something they talk about when they decide to "meet up". Plus, I can see Azula/Katara and Sokka/Zuko keeping their relationship under wraps for a while so the parents don't even know their son and daughter are dating someone until they come out and say it.

“But would probably keep their own secret to the grave.” Definitely! When they're "introduced" at a dinner in an attempt to introduce the families to one another, they freak out. Kya and Hakoda are already there and eating when Ursa and Ozai step in the house and they just start choking on their food.

Katara: You already know Mr and Mrs. Agni?

Kya: You could say that.

Zuko: How?

Ozai:....Business deal.

Hakoda: Yup. We have a business agreement together.

Sokka: Cool. Saves us the trouble of small talk.

Azutara and Zukka are all grown up with their own kids and all four parents have recently passed away. They go to their houses to help clean stuff out and find old letters and pictures. Their kids don't know why they spend the rest of the day screaming and crying.

[ao3feed-zukka]

Prince Zuko

Read now on Ao3 at https://ift.tt/JCpu1Lt by xox099 Sokka got hired to become The Prince's bodyguard until he gets married and crowned firelord by his arranged marriage of Lady Mai, but soon to figure out that they never loved each other that its all a show to please his father, they loved each other platonically and not like that at all. Sokka started feeling these strange feelings towards him, like a crush? But he's only ever crushed on women in the past why all of a sudden is he falling for a man? Espectually a future firelord to the firenation, the prince isn't suppose to date and love a man spectually a man that wasn't even from the Firenation and from the Southern Watertribe, what should he do? Words: 19005, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/M, M/M Characters: Zuko (Avatar), Iroh (Avatar), Zuko's Crew (Avatar), Ursa (Avatar), Ozai (Avatar), Azula (Avatar), Mai (Avatar), Kei Lo (Avatar), Aang (Avatar), Katara (Avatar), Kanna (Avatar), Hakoda (Avatar), Sokka (Avatar) Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Aang/Katara (Avatar), Kei Lo/Mai (Avatar) Additional Tags: Gay, Gay Zuko (Avatar), Slow Burn, Slow Romance, There Is No War In Ba Sing Se, Alternate Universe - No War, Firelord Zuko (Avatar), Past Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Past Sokka/Yue (Avatar), Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Angst, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Sokka Loves Zuko (Avatar), bi sokka, Loss of Virginity, No Smut, Mommy Issues, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Bodyguard, Bodyguard Romance, Princes & Princesses, Prince Zuko - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Mai/Zuko - Freeform Read it on Ao3 at https://ift.tt/JCpu1Lt

[awanderingmuse-ficrec]

(life happens) wherever you are

Fandom: Avatar the Last Airbender

Author: howlikeagod, @eternalgirlscout​

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Violence, Character Death, Imprisonment

Word Count:  159,933

Pairings: Sukka, Mailee, Bato/Hakoda, 

Characters: Zuko, Iroh, sundry OCs for plot reasons, Toph Beifong, Katara, Sokka, Mai, Aang, Hakoda, Azula, Ty Lee, Haru, The Duke, Teo, Chit Sang

Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, technically a canon divergence coffeeshop au, Canon-Typical Violence, The Jasmine Dragon, )POV Changes, so many POV changes, Customer Service, propaganda and brainwashing, Zuko's Morality Coma, Give Zuko A Pet 2k19, not exactly cruelty to animals. more like rudeness to animals, Canonical Child Abuse, Ozai Being a Terrible Parent, Ba Sing Se, Zuko's mommy issues and other things that can be seen from space, the violence inherent in the system, Minor Character Death, AtLA says Prisons Are a Tool of the Oppressor, Toph's life-changing field trip, the power of bi polyamory saves the day

On the day before Ba Sing Se falls, Katara decides two things: 1) not to stop for a cup of tea; 2) consequently, the fate of the world.

Behind the walls, Zuko loses sleep, runs errands, contemplates treason, and drinks a lot of hot leaf juice—not necessarily in that order.

[ao3feedzukka-blog]

Prince Zuko

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54916411 by xox099 Sokka got hired to become The Prince's bodyguard until he gets married and crowned firelord by his arranged marriage of Lady Mai, but soon to figure out that they never loved each other that its all a show to please his father, they loved each other platonically and not like that at all. Sokka started feeling these strange feelings towards him, like a crush? But he's only ever crushed on women in the past why all of a sudden is he falling for a man? Espectually a future firelord to the firenation, the prince isn't suppose to date and love a man spectually a man that wasn't even from the Firenation and from the Southern Watertribe, what should he do? Words: 19005, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Avatar: The Last Airbender Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/M, M/M Characters: Zuko (Avatar), Iroh (Avatar), Zuko's Crew (Avatar), Ursa (Avatar), Ozai (Avatar), Azula (Avatar), Mai (Avatar), Kei Lo (Avatar), Aang (Avatar), Katara (Avatar), Kanna (Avatar), Hakoda (Avatar), Sokka (Avatar) Relationships: Sokka/Zuko (Avatar), Aang/Katara (Avatar), Kei Lo/Mai (Avatar) Additional Tags: Gay, Gay Zuko (Avatar), Slow Burn, Slow Romance, There Is No War In Ba Sing Se, Alternate Universe - No War, Firelord Zuko (Avatar), Past Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Past Sokka/Yue (Avatar), Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Angst, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Sokka Loves Zuko (Avatar), bi sokka, Loss of Virginity, No Smut, Mommy Issues, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Bodyguard, Bodyguard Romance, Princes & Princesses, Prince Zuko - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Mai/Zuko - Freeform April 02, 2024 at 04:14PM

[comradefleur]

i really like the idea of hakoda with bato so that when sokka comes out super nervously as bisexual to his father he gets a big hug and a "me too, son" and his jaw just drops like HUHHHHHH?

his jaw drops in typical sokka fashion and he's even more surprised when his father tells him who bato really is to him. he goes to katara like did YOU know this? he's in shock but he's elated and happy to not only be accepted but understood intimately by his father 🥰

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

something that's really funny to me is that katara and sokka would both have some complicated feelings about bakoda but none of it would ever fall on bato. katara's feeling some type of way about hakoda moving on romantically from their mother but it's not about bato "replacing" kya, he was already part of the family even when she was alive. there's no resentment towards him it's solely about how she and hakoda deal with kya's memory. sokka's world is kind of shattered by hakoda being bi and not the stereotypical hetero manly man he thought but finding out bato's gay doesn't bother him at all, he didn't base his sense of self on his perception of bato. if anything bato being gay just explains why he was always hanging around during their childhood and never had kids of his own.

it's like, bato joining the family? hell yeah bato's great we love bato. hakoda dating a man? well that'll take some getting used to

[babydotcom]

okay i don't know if anyone's said this before but i think hakoda and bato's relationship is really important to sokka accepting his attraction to men. this absolutely got away from me so the analysis is under the cut. i'd appreciate it if you gave this a read!

we all know sokka sees his dad as the pinnacle of Manliness, and spends so much of his childhood and teenage years trying to live up to this standard he feels hakoda has set for him (whether or not this perception is accurate). he is supposed to be a warrior, a protector, a leader. he is supposed to be strong. this is why he represses all of his negative emotions, all his grief, sadness, rage, hurt. it's why he falls madly in love with the first sweet, emotional, kind, traditionally feminine girl he's ever met that he's not related to, because yue compliments his perception of manhood. it's why suki, a woman who is all of the things he thinks a man should be, is confusing to him. suki opens his eyes a little bit, because she is an attractive girl that also embodies manhood the way sokka thinks he should.

from the beginning of book two on, we see sokka be more honest with himself about his attraction to men, even if he's not so open about it. there's the boulder, chong in the cave of two lovers, and zuko (he was flirting at the western air temple i don't care. this isn't about shipping anyway). these are men that sokka textually finds attractive, so he knows he's not straight. this doesn't fit into his perception of manhood- hakoda's love for kya was incredible, so of course sokka would ingrain heterosexuality into manhood. he never voices this same-sex attraction (i know this is nickelodeon, but you know what i mean), but it's pretty much a no-brainer that a relationship with suki, who he perceives as being man-adjacent, is something he wants so much to pursue.

from book two on, we also see sokka sort of reevaluate this manhood standard by expanding his horizons. he finally is expressing himself creatively. first is the haiku club in ba sing se-- when else have we seen him trying to impress girls by meeting them where they're at, using his words in poetry to impress them rather than performing some act of machismo? second and infinitely more importantly is in Sokka's Master. the entire episode is about sokka proving (and realizing) his worth, and to him he is only worth anything if he is a perfect man, if he is like his father. for someone training to be a swordsman, we actually see sokka do little swordfighting in comparison to how much art (which for the sake of this post we'll consider traditionally feminine) he does. he never once complains about this, but his appreciation of the arts changes over the course of his training. for his first calligraphy practice, sokka tries, sure, but he doesn't take it seriously. he mushes his face into the paper, taking the easy, and the more brash route to the end goal.

he approaches his first spar with *checks notes* fat, the same way. he tries, but fails spectacularly because he takes the brash and easy route, making the most obvious first strike against his opponent. he sucks with the sword, so far. it's only after he takes piandao's painting lesson seriously-- or as seriously as he's capable of-- that he has any sort of breakthrough in his swordfighting. his development as a swordsdman, his mastering of a masculine activity and fighting style, is dependent on his acceptance of art and emotion and creativity, of femininity. piandao's training, his emphasis on the arts, is what made sokka a great swordbender. in realizing his worth, sokka had to accept femininity into his ideal of man.

back to hakoda and bato. sokka doesn't get a lot of time with his dad before the invasion on the day of black sun, because obviously they have a war to fight. but what time he does have with hakoda is spent spiraling over his worth as a man yet again, because hakoda has shown just how much sokka has yet to grow as a leader. it's neither of their faults, but hakoda showing up sokka at the planning meeting causes a blockage in sokka's growth, just after he'd reached new heights in sokka's master. sokka's back to feeling like shit, and this is compounded by the failure of the invasion. that moment at zuko's coronation, when hakoda tells sokka that's he proud of him, after sokka had been absolutely crucial to winning the war? that's means the world to him. his Ideal his proud of him.

i imagine that during the war, hakoda and bato weren't together. hakoda was still mourning kya (and he always will be, but the wound was fresher then), and then they were fighting for their lives. so, i think when they do get together, it's not terribly long after the war. sokka seeing them start a romantic relationship is what allows him to finally embrace his attraction to men. his father, his chief, his pinnacle of manliness, can love other men and express that openly. hakoda is the Typical Father in that we don't really see him actually vulnerable other than that moment in boiling rock when he tears up at seeing sokka, so to see his father in a loving relationship again, with bato, his life long best friend, would be incredibly powerful for sokka. it finally clicks that sokka can love a man, too, and that loving a man does not make him less of one. before bakoda get together, sokka probably fears ever coming to terms with his same-sex attraction. he knows that hakoda loves him absolutely, but the nagging voice in most, if not all, queer peoples' heads still makes sokka wonder if hakoda would respect him as a man if he were in a gay relationship, regardless of how much hakoda loves him. to have that worry soothed... that's everything to him, when it comes to his sexuality and acceptance of himself.

much of sokka's arc throughout the series is about deconstructing that idea of manhood he's held onto since he was a little boy, and redefining masculinity in terms that embrace the feminine parts of him that make him such a great warrior, protector, and leader. he is loving in his protectiveness, he is soft in his strength, he is creative and artistic in his leadership. sokka's development in this regard is incomplete by the end of the series, because he's 15 and nobody is done growing up at that age, but him getting his dad back, and finding that his ideal isn't really what he thought, has him on the right track to fully embracing himself as a man whose strengths go beyond the idea that he created as a kid, and whose love goes beyond gender. i just think that's neat.

[abby420]

me after consuming any piece of media: now which father figure am i gonna assign to this silly little bisexual :))