#blood of the pine tag

[abyssalzones]

was it a friday night? was it a saturday night?

[tazmiilly]

hanging out with your family's family

[ferretwhomst]

it's gonna hurt like hell, but we're gonna be well

i'll give you my best shot

[number1villainstan]

toga himiko 🤝chisaki kai

"i bet you'd look so pretty if i cut you up" (trying to flirt)

[claychai]

little doodle to keep you fed since im doing really bad at making art lately lol

[ypipie]

ughrghhh this is dumb (cw potentially unsettling image under the cut)

original image ^-^

[gothprentiss]

jennifer jareau & emily prentiss

ada limón, "wife" / june jordan, "poem for haruko" / h.d., "at baia" / leonard cohen, "take this longing" (live in hanover, 1979) / adrienne rich, twenty-one love poems "iii" / emily dickinson, letter to susan huntington, february 1852

[fordtato]

[Image ID: rough sketches of Stanford and Stanley Pines, facing each other. A yellowish light is cast on Ford, who also has a small amount of blood trickling out of his eye, and a bluish light is cast on Stan, who has a mullet. Both have devastated expressions on their faces. A small minimalist painted doodle of Bill (in yellow) and the Portal (in grey and blue) are in the middle, implying where the light is coming from. end ID]

[gobblewanker]

So since we've finally established Bill isn't actually human...

Consider this a teaser for next chapter.

(Transcript below)

Do you know what it's like to not exist?

I have the power to do everything but never get anything out of it. No smell. No taste. No touch. No sensation at all. Just... Nothing.  A vast nothingness stretching on and on forever like the uncomfortable silence after a bad joke. I could watch. Nothing more. Infinite power but no meaningful way to use it.

It's self preservation, really. Stealing bodies. I never wanted to be human. I didn't. It's all that damn shaman's fault. He was supposed to help me. Save me. But he betrayed me. He cut the lifeline and tried to kill me with an ancient ritual. A human energy circle. 

But they didn't have the right humans.

Lacking quality, they made up for it with quantity. The entire island. All those tiny little candlelights throwing themselves together into one flash of an inferno before burning out. The energy was immense.

But not enough.

They couldn't destroy me. But he could stall me.  He went into my mind.  He removed all knowledge of where the island was, where the gateway had been built, how it looked, and how to find it. With his last breath he cursed the land itself. That no-one would ever be able to find it without being led there.  That it would never be added to a map. 

All so that I wouldn't find it.

He couldn’t blind my all-seeing eye. But he did mar it.

So, I did the next best thing. I settled for experiencing the world through human eyes.  Kings, queens, beggars and priests… I was everything. It was intense. It was vibrant. I was alive.

A human body is a prison, but a prison is better than a nothing.

But eventually, it wasn't enough.

I'm a being of unlimited power. Do you have any idea how constricting it is needing to waste a quarter of my life asleep? Do you have any idea how bad food tastes after centuries of eating it? I have been like this for ages. Everything is the same flavour of bland. The pleasure. The pain...

None of it is fun anymore.

Without chasing the next high, I feel nothing. And every time I need to reach higher and higher to get anything out of it at all.

I need to exist as me. No matter who has to die.

So, I made a new goal for myself: Find my old gateway.  Find a body. Find a crew. Don't stop sailing until I track it down.

I couldn't remember the location. I couldn’t remember the name. All I could remember was the smell of salt and the sound of churning waterfalls. So, when my first crew asked, I simply called it ‘the waterfall port’. ‘El puerto de la cascada’.

I moved from crew to crew, century to century, body to body.

It didn't matter that my eyes went from blue to brown to grey. 

It didn't matter if the shade of my hair changed. 

It didn't matter if scars under my clothes came and went. 

Very few who came close enough to notice ever lived to talk about it.

With a changing world came changing languages. And eventually, my island's title was shortened and corrupted until it was just simply…

"Port Cascada".

That name found you. And you found me. How?

... You're not even listening. Are you?

[thereareeyesinsidethetrees]

note: might rewrite this at some point. one night/day isn't really a lot of time for writing, y'know? (at least in terms of multichapter fics)

warnings for: injury, blood, self-harm, suicide attempt, and some rather unpleasant to read dialogue

no character death, though!

also, yes, there will be a second chapter for this later in the month (and probably also more after that, not entirely sure yet. i would like to write his recovery if possible)

[piningprecussionist]

(Not an rp ask)

What is your opinion on chau x kim? I'm not a shipper of it myself but I heard it was a proship since knives is 17 but also I saw she was 18 in the comic so I'm not sure where to stand on it honestly. But I'd like to hear your opinion about it !! Sorry if this is a bit of a random ask (ーー;

You're completely fine!! Do not even worry about it.

So, yeah- When Scott first meets Knives, and I'm not entirely sure how much time passes between then and when they start dating, it was *literally* her seventeenth birthday, as I am reminding myself reading back over these panels presently. And then at the start of book six, the first time we see (real, non-dream,) Knives, she has apparently been eighteen for a week!

Now, I'm going to preface with a little something before I go further into this: I am totally fine answering this ask and others like it I think! but, I will note, I do get like a (not fun) physical sensation in my chest- partly anxiety (lol) but also something else I think- thinking about them like 95% of the time- it's gotta be like. Handled The Right Way, if that makes sense. Let's get into it.

So, first off, I'm just gonna re: some of the stuff relative to this I've posted here before- both nonrp and rp, since I use RP to develop my read on Kim and shed some light on how I see things I guess!

These clips come from this ask (and reblog) here!

This rp ask here, which is simply too difficult for me to get in a good screenshot I feel, so I recommend just checking it and the tags for it out- I will share my Bonus Commentary reply though:

This ask as well! Tags less pressing, but still provide a little insight.

And this is probably a dumb inclusion if I really want to make a pseudonym to post fics under, but. I have posted my (very early) thoughts on the SPTO sparks scene to AO3 before, so- (and before going into this- I did remember that Julie and Gideon have that sparks scene after the fact!)

And here's the Barely Anything Lines hinting at the ship that I had in that fic that I used to justify that blurb, while we're here:

I think I've gone over my feelings a little bit in the discord as well, and there might even be more rp stuff relative to it, but I'm not going to go back and get any of that honestly- at least, not right now, or unless requested, since I don't really feel like it's necessary, if it does exist. This gives a pretty good glimpse in I'd say- especially that second to last one there.

So. Yeah.

Used to ship it; have expanded my horizons since then. I don't really want to knock it because like... for some people this is a legitimate life experience for them- one that might have even turned out well, miraculously. And there also a lot of minors in this fandom evidently, so like, any other baby gays out there just wanting to Project for a minute? I feel that. Sincerely I do. It's not the wisest choice but better to read fanfiction about it than go out and actually make out with a 23 year old, Gods forbid. (Genuinely felt sick thinking about that; fucking gross. Any minors out there: Please Make Good Choices. Look out for yourselves. Begging you. There are too many freaks in this world- I promise you whoever you're thinking of probably isn't the magical exception.)

But there are definitely things to consider about them that are very interesting to me, still, so like. I'm in this weird state of conflict; I don't know if it's just me being like "it happened, you can't escape it" or having been desensitized/some sort of Brainwashed by how many times I had to use Knives in the game to quick heal- maybe something else but I just don't feel like flaying myself open like that unprompted for just anyone- but like. Oh man.

Sorry, gathering/writing this that feeling like went away but came circling back for this last bit, it seems. Which makes sense I guess. I feel like I'm setting myself up for a Pyre right now eugh shfsgkjfhjg

I dunno. I'm not gonna lie and pretend like I know it to be some big formative ship for me in my early teen years, but it was kind of important in finally coming around to realizing how queer I was, I think. My memories of the time are fuzzy, but it would have been one of the things- there were likely larger ones, my current obsession could be recoloring my past here so I'm trying to acknowledge that.

But there is like. A dynamic that is posited by them that is also one I'm a really big sucker for. More so now than I was then, so I find myself grinding my teeth about that a fair bit at times.

I definitely still really like it as something unrequited no matter what I think; I like the idea of Knives having a really big crush on Kim, genuinely. I think it's cute and funny as hell for how uncomfortable it would make Kim, who's just trying so hard not to be a fucking creep while this ray of sunshine hangs off her- something she absolutely does not deserve (in her eyes.)

I'm obviously more partial to Kim resisting any advances made at her, but I can understand so, so badly why someone might be attracted to the idea of Knives managing to thaw some of Kim's frigidity with that. Ugh.

If they work for me, I think they'd have to work for me after Knives is gone at college for a bit. Kim would need to know Knives for longer than she knew her as a minor- and they'd have to be FRIENDS in that time, quite strictly. Kim would need to not feel (intensely, because frankly, she would unavoidably feel this way at least a little no matter what,) like she was a fucking groomer going into it, basically. I don't know what I think past that.

You know, I'll put my feelings like this: with the exception of a fic I saw recommended to someone that intrigued me, I have managed to resist reading any/many fics featuring them, despite it being a large majority of the wlw Kim fics that exist, and also kinda just Kim fics generally. It's kind of Insane, especially considering how much Kimona SCREAM at you from the pages of the comic itself- but I digress....

I've been working on this for like over an hour now I think so I really should cut myself off. I am like,, too hungry and mildly stoned to be rambling off about this maybe. If you want more concise/specific thoughts, I recommend prompting! I can try and channel the responses easier with a bit more direction, maybe?

...

actually another thing real quick- I like. Do not know that I could ever feel comfortable, truly, consuming content for them, not knowing if the OP has good intentions. I just Do Not trust people, largely, so that's just like. A little thing. Idk. "Death to the author" or whatever but I am still allowed to feel personally uncomfortable ya know! I don't want them taking my silent observation as like,, passive acceptance in the event that they were. Idk if that makes sense, I need to go eat already, I'm hitting post before i drag this out to TWO hours

[aibafiles]

in my romeo & juliet opinion haver era again i just saw A Take and i was gonna write a Response about it but im just quietly seething

[ferretwhomst]

psssttttt for no reason in particular and NOTTT relating 2 my last ask.. do u have a ref of ur blood brothers stanley pines perhaps

OK SO. here are two things, one for his body and the other for his default outfit. the ear thing is not a recent addition btw, it's been there since i started drawing him but i forgor to add it for awhile including in the second image. so ignore that HEJSDKSD

it's also important to me that anyone who draws portal stan draws his button-up and undershirt (particularly the undershirt) kinda bloodied sfhjsemdkmsdms his other colors are Mostly the same apart from his hair and beard:

^ also an example of Bloodied Undershirt

i think that's all! sorry for spending like 5 years making this i rlly hope it helps

also, i know you most likely just meant portal stan, but i also have a ref of parallel (ghost) stan. putting it under a readmore jic

CW FOR SELF-HARM/(IMPLIED???) SUICIDE BELOW BY THE WAY. to be precise, there's a not very detailed drawing of a slit wrist. but i figured i'd warn anyway. better safe than sorry

poor guy, i've put him through so much shit sdhhfdhsd

[sparklehounds]

what have i done?

[bernardmarx]

older newer

[deathbringer]

WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT HOLD ON I'M CONNECTING SOME DOTS

FUCK