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sailorrhansol · 3 months

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Blood & Popcorn | l.c (m)

❀ Pairing: Lee Chan x f. Reader

❀ Summary: Fridays are reserved for watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and stuffing your face with popcorn and pizza. It’s been like that for you and Chan since your freshman year of college. But when he skips your Blood and Popcorn night for a date, things take an unexpected turn.

❀ Word Count: 11,315

❀ Genre: Friends to Lovers, Angst, Fluff

❀ Type: Smut

❀ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging in and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately.

❀ Warnings: Literally so much misunderstanding and repressed feelings, pining, light themes of jealousy, recreational drinking, recreational weed use, bad communication skills, some mild insecurities, explicit language, explicit sexual content including unprotected vaginal sex (do not do this lmaooo), nipple stim, light teasing, oral (f. receiving), clumsy/playful sex, jokes/banter while fucking. They’re both down horrendous. Joshua as an almost love interest. Jeonghan is both terrible and great at advice. Alternating POVs and some time skips.

❀ A/N: This is another work coming from a conversation with @daechwitatamic who at this point, I think had been the driving force behind all three random one shots I’ve written. I apparently can’t say no when she asks for something :) so anyway, here is simp Lee Chan and simp reader because ???? And yes I'm posting this at 11:30 pm at night who cares there are no rules!!!!!!!!

❀ A/N 2: Also thank you to Jo for reading this before hand because it would be otherwise largely illegible. King Julian is on the way, bestie.

❀ Disclaimer: Disclaimer: All members of Seventeen are faces and name claims for stories. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios. Moreover, none of my works accurately reflect, represent or take a stance on the nuances of Korean culture, cities, people etc. Seventeen members are not Seventeen culturally, intellectually, physically, or representationally in my stories, and should be considered name and face stand-ins for made up characters.

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“So why not Blood and Pizza if pizza is always involved but popcorn isn’t?” Mingyu eyes the french fries on your plate. You give him a warning glance, pointing the sharp tines of your fork at him. He retreats, leaning against the cracked vinyl of the booth, pouting. “Also, the title sounds gross.”

“Good thing it has nothing to do with you then.”

“Wow, you’re not even going to invite me?”

“No,” you chirp, popping a shoestring fry into your mouth. You savor the saltiness, humming delightedly. “It’s for me and Chan. Not me, Chan and you. Plus, you know nothing about Buffy.”

“Isn’t that a magic dragon? And are you sure you two aren’t dating?”

The look you send Mingyu makes him hold up his hands in surrender. It isn’t the first time someone has asked if you and Chan are dating, and you know it won’t be the last. You don’t want to start down that avenue tonight, trying to navigate the questions of why and well you seem to be a good match.

If romantic relationships were started over simply having things in common and matching a vibe, you and Chan would have started dating a long time ago. But you’re not, and you’ve already gotten over the fact that you’re not dating and that you will not start dating.

Mostly.

The bell rings above the diner door, drawing your attention. Like he’s been manifested by Mingyu’s dangerous question, Chan spots you and lifts a hand, a smile splitting his face as he heads over. You scoot over in the booth, dragging your plate along with you to make room for him.

Chan is dressed in jeans and a green sweater, your favorite color on him. He sits down next to you, cushioned seat dipping a little as he leans over to kiss the top of your head and steal fries off of your plate. You let him, feeling heat flush up the side of your neck as you look anywhere but Mingyu’s accusatory stare.

“These are so good,” Chan says around a mouthful of fries. “Thanks, Bambi.”

You grin at the nickname, trying not to flush too hard.

“I wouldn’t know,” Mingyu says pointedly. You ignore him, shoving your burger in your mouth. “Apparently I’m not allowed fries or to attend your movie night.”

“Order your own fries,” Chan says.

“Ugh. I already ate mine.”

“So order more, idiot. And of course you’re not invited to Blood and Popcorn. That’s our thing.”

Our thing.

The corner of your mouth twitches as you glance at Chan. He doesn’t notice, catching the eyes of the server and waving happily, giving her a broad smile. She gives him a thumbs up in return, confirming she’ll put in his usual now that he’s there.

There are a lot of things that belong to you and Chan. Studying at the very diner you were sitting in during freshman year had been one of them, though now in your final year there’s not as much of a need to study and you’ve incorporated other friends in your late night trips for grease and calories.

You also shared trivia nights on Tuesdays with Vernon and Seungkwan, football Sundays with Seungcheol, Mingyu and Jeonghan, once a month family dinners with everyone, and most importantly, Blood and Popcorn.

Chan steals another fry off of your plate and you let him, leaning back in the booth. Mingyu glares daggers at you, dark eyes flicking from your plate, to you, to Chan. You grin around a mouthful of cheeseburger and he scoffs before looking away.

Behind you, Chan’s arm stretches across the back of the booth, just barely brushing against the top of your shoulders. Your stomach flips a little, momentarily elated at the contact before you swallow it down with Sprite, pretending it wasn’t there in the first place.

The two boys immediately fall into a conversation about their shared engineering class. You tune it out easily, a learned habit over the last four years of having to listen to Chan tell you the functions of a bridge and the best way to design one. Instead, you focus on the rise and fall of Chan’s soft voice and the way it lulls you into a state of calm.

When the server brings over his order, he pulls his arm from over the back of the seat. Immediately you snatch one of the onion rings from his basket, popping one into your mouth and hissing as the crispy snack burns you. He shakes his head, laughing as he gives you a napkin while you sputter.

“Careful, Bambi,” he murmurs. “They’re literally steaming.”

Mingyu reaches for an onion ring, only to be threatened with the blunt end of Chan’s steak knife. “Don’t even think about it.”

“But she-”

“Bambi has special privileges,” Chan quips. “Order yourself some more fries for the love of God. I’ll pay for them.”

Mingyu immediately stops whining, mood improving markedly as he orders fries, wiggling in his seat happily. Chan cuts his burger in half, asking, “Why were you talking about Blood and Popcorn anyway?”

“Shua asked Bambi out on a date,” Mingyu answers around a mouthful of fries. “She told him she couldn’t go because of Blood and Popcorn.”

Chan stops eating and looks at you, brows creasing. You feel your heart rate speed up as you kick Mingyu under the table. He yelps, knee jerking upward to slam against the underside of the table. The salt and pepper shakers rattle in place as Mingyu bends over to rub his shin.

“He didn’t ask me out on a date.”

“He asked you to dinner!”

“As friends!”

“Oh yeah,” Mingyu snorts, rolling his eyes. “Friends take friends to fucking prime steakhouses. He asked you out on a date.”

For a moment, silence envelops the table. You stare at your fries, watching Chan out of your periphery. He looks away from you, wiping the grease from his fingers onto the napkin. The air feels pregnant with tension suddenly, your anxiety bubbling as you open your mouth to assert once more it wasn’t a date.

Chan beats you to breaking the silence, “We can skip this Friday so you can go!”

You open and close your mouth a few times, heart dropping to your ass. “What?”

“It’s totally fine if we have to skip. I don’t mind.”

Chan picks his burger back up, not looking at you. Heart pounding in your chest, you can’t help but watch him in total silence, trying to string together a response. Sure, maybe Chan doesn’t mind if you miss your weekly solo hangout. But you care.

The ache of the implication cuts you suddenly, a delayed reaction. You feel your throat tighten painfully, reaching for your Sprite to try and swallow past the sudden tension. It does nothing to quell the way the casual dismissal of your tradition keeps cutting you long after he’s said the words, sawing down to the bone.

“I wasn’t aware that we could just skip Blood and Popcorn, I guess.”

“I mean if you’ve got a date.”

That’s not the point, you want to scream at him.

Chan is a lot of things. Perceptive isn’t one of them. If he had been, you know he would have sniffed out your feelings for him a long time ago. Luckily for you, he’s remained completely oblivious over the last four years of your friendship, and you like to keep it that way. Keep it safe.

Nothing ruins a friendship more than unrequited romance. You know that from more than just the media you consume - you’ve seen more than once first hand when one friend catches feelings for the others but the desire isn’t mutual.

It isn’t mutual here. It’s always been very clear where Chan’s interests lie, and you’re totally fine with that. You accept the relationship that you have happily and quietly, and thought moments like are a brutal reminder of where you stand, it’s alright because you also love your friendship. More than you love him - at least, you think so.

So when Chan so easily suggests to go on a date, to cancel your thing with him to accommodate, you know it isn’t because he doesn’t care. He just thinks that you should go on a date because it doesn’t occur to him that the real reason you don’t want to is because your interests are somewhere else. That you don’t want to cancel Blood and Popcorn because it’s for the two of you and no one else.

“Yeah,” you rasp, unsure what else to say. “Um, maybe.”

“Shua is a good guy.”

“Yeah. Yeah he is.”

Mingyu and Chan go back to their conversation about class. You finish your meal in silence, leaning back against the seat as your thoughts wander listlessly. You gaze around the diner, drinking in detail as their conversation becomes background noise and you can no longer understand what they’re saying.

Rounders Diner had been a staple in the college community long before you were born, and continues to be the center for academic life. Students fill the booths sipping on milkshakes as they cram for exams or homework, night shift workers sit at the countertop and order coffee before heading to work, and the jukebox in the corner glows neon, only offering a selection of music from the 50s.

Behind the countertop is an open scratch kitchen, the sound of sizzling grease and yelled orders bracketing an Elvis song you know the words to but don’t know the name of. Black and white tile flooring with years worth of scuffs reflect the canned lighting in the ceiling. Over near the entrance is a wall covered in pictures of students of note throughout the years.

You remember the first time Chan had hauled you to Rounders. It was the first day you’d met, two freshmen absolutely terrified of the world after experiencing two back to back intro courses together. The dining hall was on the opposite side of campus from your classes, but Chan had insisted there was a diner just off the corner that everyone said was a necessary experience.

He was the first real friend you made. Your roommates had become your best friends too, Lorna and Mai splashed across almost every memory you have of college. But that first day is only colored with Chan, who had slid into the seat across from you and looked around the diner with a bright grin like he was suddenly at home.

Wanna start coming here after class?

You did. And you had.

A hand waves in front of your face, making you blink several times before Chan’s face swims into focus. Your thoughts are a little delayed as you drink him in: dark hair framing dark, angular eyes that turn molten brown when the sun hits them just right, a jawline that has turned sharper as he’s aged, though his cheeks still have a youthful softness that you adore, and a grin that makes the world dim.

“What?” you ask him, totally at a loss for words.

He laughs and you feel the corners of your lips turn upward, an automatic response to his mirth. “I asked if you were ready to go.”

You look up to see Mingyu at the register, passing over the bill and a card. “I think I spaced out. I thought you were buying him fries?”

He snorts. “Never fear, it’s my card. Everything okay?”

You hesitate. Not for the first time, the urge to spill your guts to him grips you so forcefully that you almost do right in the middle of Rounders. Almost tell him everything from start to finish, the feelings, the reason you don’t want to date Joshua, how beautiful you think Chan is-

Mingyu starts heading back and you force a grin on your face, bumping his shoulder with yours. “Of course. A little tired, though. Thanks for dinner.”

“You know I’ve got you.” He gets up from the booth and holds his hand out to you. “Always.”

Chan is the stupidest fucking person he knows. He lets out a loud scream into the warmth of his pillow, squeezing his eyes shut as he lays face down in his bed. His arms are shoved under the pillow, fisting in his sheets as the long-winded scream finally begins to die out.

“Yes, that is healthy,” Seungkwan calls from Chan’s desk against the window. “Let the pillow know everything that you’re feeling.”

Scowling, Chan lifts his head up and looks over his shoulder at where Seungkwan is sitting. His roommate is hunched over Chan’s laptop, a document open on the screen as he clicks around rapidly, cursing under his breath.

“Why are you in here again?”

“My literature professor is a dinosaur,” Seungkwan answers. “And only accepts printed essay submissions.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes.”

“No, I mean you don’t have your own printer?”

“No, and I will not be paying thirty cents a paper for an essay that is almost thirty pages long.”

“That’s like, nine dollars dude. Also, why is your essay thirty pages long?”

“Ask the dude who wrote Beowulf.”

“Isn’t that like… a movie?”

Seungkwan mutters something under his breath. The printer chimes, followed by a mechanic whirring as the paper feeds into the machine and starts printing. Spinning in the chair, Seungkwan looks at where Chan is still laying stomach down, face squished against his pillow as he cradles it.

“Speaking of movies - are you having Blood and Popcorn here or at Bambi’s?”

Chan can’t help but smirk at the nickname. It had stuck ever since your freshman year when you’d called Rin Hartford a bambi-eyed bitch for saying nasty things to Mingyu. He thinks that night might be the night he realized he was absolutely head over heels for you, even if he had only known you for two weeks then.

Despite your quiet disposition, you’ve always been the epitome of bravery. He can’t recall a time that you haven’t said what you meant or meant what you said, and defending your friends and speaking up has always been paramount to you.

For someone like Chan who was often the youngest and the softest spoken in any group he was in, you were a breath of fresh air. And you’ve taught him to speak up for himself, letting him grow comfortable pushing back with people - especially his friends - and how to give back what he gets.

Corrupted, Seungcheol joked once. She corrupted him and taught him how to bully us back.

“I’m not really sure,” Chan says slowly, thinking about your conversation at the diner, the exact source of his pillow-scream. “We might not be doing it.”

“Uh-oh. Trouble in paradise?”

“There is no paradise. We’re just friends.”

“That’s the trouble I’m talking about, brother.” Seungkwan turns around to start collecting the pages out of the printer. “Is the Blood and Popcorn cancellation the reason for your pillow screaming?”

“I don’t know that it’s canceled.”

“That really clarifies the issue.”

Chan scowls. “Did you know Shua was into her?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“He asked her on a date.”

“Joshua must have got tired of waiting for you to make a move on Bambi. I guess he decided you weren’t going to.”

Chan frowns and sits up. He didn’t realize Joshua remotely had a thing for you, and while Chan adores the older member of their larger friend group, the thought of him taking you to dinner - a date - makes his stomach tighten.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means,” Seungkwan clarifies. “That you have had the last four years to nut up or shut up. Everyone has waited for you to make your move on Bambi and you haven’t. If you’re not going to do it, someone else might as well.”

“I mean, anyone could ask her out. It’s not like I have-”

“Don’t you dare say you didn’t have dibs. Dibs can be unspoken, Chan. You’ve been in love with that girl since freshman year, if you think people - especially our friends - cannot tell and don’t respect you enough to give you time to ask her out, you need to wake up.”

“It’s that obvious?”

“Not to her, clearly.” Seungkwan stands and grins at Chan placidly, his essay collected in his hands. “Fortunately for you, the only person who is as dumb as you are is Bambi. Match made in heaven, really.”

Chan chews his bottom lip. That offers a little bit of relief. He doesn’t like knowing that his feelings are so obvious to everyone else, but at least you don’t know. He cannot imagine how uncomfortable it would make your friendship dynamic knowing he was mooning over you while you just saw him as a friend.

“Well, she doesn’t feel that way about me. I’m not going to confess my unrequited feelings and put her in that position to deal with them. It wouldn’t be fair.”

Seungkwan gives Chan a slow blink, smile turning plastic. “Like I said. Match made in heaven.”

Heaving a sigh, Chan throws himself on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. Chan was certainly an idiot for a lot of reasons, but the biggest reason has to be the way he has let his feelings for you fester since freshman year. Instead of implementing preventative maintenance, he’s let the problem grow to the point that his friends are no longer waiting for him to do something about it.

The window of opportunity is gone.

Not that there was a window of opportunity to begin with. Chan has seen what it looks like when you’re interested in guys - dazed eyes, a little flustered, a tiny grin on your face. You’ve never looked at him that way. At least, not really like that. You smile at him all the time, but it’s different.

If he had the slightest indication you looked at him like you were interested, he’d have spilled his feelings a long time ago. Hiding this from you feels almost like a violation of friendship, but in order to preserve the friendship and keep you comfortable, he does what he must.

The memory of him telling you to go on a date with Joshua makes him groan in embarrassment. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, seeing stars explode behind his lids. It had been a knee jerk response, something to distract you from the immediate jealousy and panic he’d felt that moment that Mingyu had dropped that bit of information at the table.

Mingyu. That motherfucker did it on purpose - not to rile Chan, but to try and give him a kick in the ass toward the right direction. But like everyone else, Mingyu doesn’t get it. If Chan told you how he felt just to get it off of his chest, it would be putting his burden on you. You’d be the one who had to feel guilty for it being unrequited, you’d be the one who would inevitably feel uncomfortable or out of place.

No. It would be the highest form of selfishness he can think of, offloading the heavy weight of his feelings just to give them to you as a reprieve from carrying them around so long.

Chan blinks away the swimming colors, staring up at the popcorn ceiling of his bedroom again. He can hear Seungkwan singing somewhere in the apartment, liquid voice calming even in Chan’s mild state of distress.

Joshua is a good guy. Honestly, there are only a few guys that Chan knows who would make a suitable partner for you, and he begrudgingly acknowledges that Joshua is at the top of that list. And yet he still feels a twist of self-loathing that he had pushed you so quickly towards it, the regret like bile in his stomach.

The last thing Chan wants to do is skip Blood and Popcorn this week. It is the one guaranteed day of uninterrupted time with you, and he waved it away like it meant nothing to him, which could not be farther from the truth. The nights of watching Buffy and eating pizza and sometimes popcorn mean everything to him.

He just wishes he had been brave enough to stand his ground.

Maybe Joshua Hong is the worst person ever. Chan dismisses the irrational thought as soon as he has it. Joshua isn’t awful at all. It’s just that he’s leaning in toward you and saying something into your ear over the loud din of the party, and Chan watches the way you nod.

Crack. The plastic cup in his hand splits and immediately spills rum and coke all over the kitchen floor. Jeonghan starts yelling at him, ripping paper towels off of the roll and throwing them in Chan’s direction. He mutters an apology, gaze drifting over the kitchen counter to the living room where you’re laughing, head tilted back, warm light splaying across your throat-

“Ya! Don’t just let it pool at your feet!”

Jeonghan’s screech brings Chan back to life. He snatches the copious amounts of paper towels Jeonghan has thrown at him and starts to soak up the drink. The tile floor is already sticky and Chan cringes. No way have either Jeonghang or Seungcheol cleaned this floor any time recently. If anything, Chan has done it a favor.

The party is in full swing around him. He stands up with the soaked paper in his hand, tossing it into the trash and grabbing more while Jeonghan digs underneath the counter. Chan finishes soaking up the spilled drink and comes eye to eye with a new set of paper towels and spray cleaner.

Chan gives Jeonghan the soaked papers. “Jeonghan, your floor is already disgusting.”

“Then you should have no problem cleaning it!”

“Sure, Mom.”

“Don’t call me that!”

He rolls his eyes but does what Jeonghan says, spraying the area quickly and pressing down the paper towels. They come away sticky and black, making him cringe in disgust before tossing them out and washing his hands. As he turns off the faucet, Jeonghan has the decency to hand him a new drink.

Chan takes it without comment, the image of Joshua leaning into you a little too much for him to deal with right now. He drains the cup, sputtering a little. Jeonghan is a heavy pour and the spiced rum goes down rough, his eyes tearing just a little as he finishes the drink.

“Well, that’s one way to stop from spilling.” Chan shoots Jeonghan a look before reaching for the mixer and handle of rum again. “You do normally drink like a fish, but anything in particular driving tonight’s thirst?”

“Nope.”

“Right, so it’s not tall, dark and handsome hanging out with Bambi?”

Chan feels his eye twitch as he heavily pours the liquor into his cup. “Nope. And Joshua isn’t even that tall.”

“Taller than you.” Chan shoots Jeonghan a venomous look. His face is beatific, grin a little bit dangerous as he holds his hands up in a white flag. “You look pretty bothered. If only there were a way to fix that.” Chan looks at Jeonghan with wide eyes, hope surging for a moment. “Just tell her you like her.”

“Why is that the only advice any of you have?”

“Because it’s the only advice I have. Either tell her or get over your feelings. Those are your options.”

“And I’ve already told you, it would just make her uncomfortable. It’s not her burden to bear.”

Jeongan taps his fingers on the countertop, studying Chan. Chan pouts into his cup, taking long draughts, trying not to cringe at the strong taste. He can already sense the oncoming buzz and he welcomes it, needing a little something to distract him from the obvious elephant in the living room.

“Alright,” Jeognhan relents. “Then deal with the consequences and get over your feelings.”

And he will. Chan has always been good at dealing with the repercussions of hiding his feelings, and he does them well. So he tips back the cup and rejoins the party, nerves steeled and ready to deal with the consequences like his friends keep telling him to.

“What?” you asked, lifting your voice to be heard over the rowdy game of cards at the coffee table. Joshua had asked you something but the words had been lost on you as your gaze drifted to Chan where he was leaning against the wall, talking to a girl you didn’t know. He was leaning awfully close. “I didn’t catch that.”

Joshua smiles. He really is handsome, and everything someone could want in a partner. He’s kind and gentle, has a little bit of an insane streak, and he is incredibly intelligent and loyal. So why do you feel nothing when he grins at you or laughs?

Your eyes drift over to Chan again and you feel your stomach flip. The alcohol turns to lead. The girl Chan is speaking to is so close to him, both of them turned toward one another as he ducks his head down to say something to her. She laughs and he smiles, looking her up and down.

Jealousy swallows you whole. It roars so loudly in your ears that you almost miss Joshua’s question again. “Did you give any thoughts about dinner on Friday?”

Dinner? Friday? Oh right. He had asked you to dinner on Friday, but you’d declined due to your planned Blood and Popcorn night. With Chan. Who is flirting with the girl next to him, who is flirting back.

The jealousy feels like a raw, rotten thing. It turns the alcohol in your stomach sour, makes the sweat on the back of your neck feel too much, like the room is too loud and too full. Even as the envy rears its head, an ugly beast ready to unleash, you turn to Joshua and say, “I really can’t. Friday nights are really important to me.”

Joshua looks disappointed, but he’s polite enough to nod and smile. “I understand. Maybe a different night?”

“Um, maybe. Would you excuse me? I really need some air.”

You stand abruptly, starling the people next to you. The cup in your hand shakes a little and your throat constricts and oh god. You cannot cry in the middle of a party just because you’re a little buzzed and the boy you like is across the room with another girl.

“Do you want me to-”

“No!” You quip, shaking your head. “Totally fine, I’m so fine, I just need some air. Please! Sit! Stay!”

Joshua raises his eyebrows at your frantic commands and you give a laugh that is a little on the hysterical side as you step over the legs of people sitting on the floor and on the couch. Joshua calls after you as you make the escape but you don’t turn around, eager to get out of the room.

You trip over someone’s foot and nearly launch into a passerby as you go. Strong hands steady you before you totally topple over, though your drink sloshes over the edge of your cup, spilling it on the carpet.

“What is it with you and your other half?” You look up to realize that it’s Jeonghan who stabilized you. “Spilling drinks all over my damn floor!”

“It probably helps. Your floors are disgusting.”

“Ya! That’s beside the point - why do you look like you’re about to die?”

“I feel like I might. I need fresh air.” For a moment, Jeonghan looks confused. You watch his dark brows pull together and he looks over your head, dark gaze scanning for something. For Chan, you realize. It’s usually Chan who leaves with you if you need air or need to stick your head in a bucket to vomit. The realization hits you like a brick. “Not him,” you whisper. “I’m fine.”

Your words land at the same time Jeonghan focuses in the direction you’d last seen Chan. He holds you there, suspended in time for a moment as his eyes dart between you and back to where you know Chan is still leaning against the wall.

There is a flicker of something that you cannot place in Jeonghan’s gaze before it softens and he nods. He pulls you toward him and helps guide you around the groups of people. “Fresh air it is.”

“You don’t have to come.”

“I don’t know, crying alone is kind of lame, Bambi.”

Cool air hits you the second you step onto the porch. Soonyoung is sitting on the railing with Jihoon and Vernon leaning next to him. He waves enthusiastically when he sees you, breaking out into a grin and lifting the joint between his fingers, an offer. You shake your head and he shrugs, passing it to Vernon who lifts a hand in salute.

The smell of weed chases you down the grass slope of Jeonghan’s backyard. It’s not so much a backyard as it is open to the apartment community’s lake. The spray of the fountain grows louder as the sounds of the party fade.

Jeonghan sits down in the grass, leaning back on his hands. You join him, cringing at the dampness from the dewey grass. Taking in a deep breath you close your eyes and lean your head back, letting the wind cool the sweat on your overheated skin. The breeze mists the fountain, tiny specks of water tingling on your face as you sit in silence.

Behind your lids, you can see the image of Chan leaning in toward that girl. The intimacy of the space. You hate how you can recall it in such detail - you’d always been able to remember details where Chan was involved. Like the way he was wearing a black, long-sleeved tee that pulled against his chest and arms perfectly, or the way the necklace you bought him two years ago glinted in the light of the living room, or the way-

“I did it to myself, huh?” you ask, feeling the first tear collect on your lash line. You tilt your head upward, trying to blink it rapidly away. “I could have just told him a while ago.”

“Well, I don’t think you’re entirely responsible,” Jeonghan mutters. “Look, putting your heart on your sleeve is really scary, especially when it’s to someone you really value. But you have to decide what to do. You can either tell Chan you love him or you can decide to get over it. You can’t cling to unspoken feelings, though.”

“I just… I don't feel like he returns the feelings and I don’t want to ruin what we have.”

“Then get over him.” You snap your gaze at Jeonghan, who is looking at you with the cool and calm you wish you felt. “If you’re unwilling to be honest with him, then your option is to get over it.”

“Do you think he would… react poorly?”

“Of course not, but I will not speak to all of Chan’s feelings. Those are his to share, not mine, and I believe in the sanctity of acting on one’s own.”

“You sound so… saintly.”

“Dealing with all your problems has turned me into a saint. Do you know what it’s like being therapy to all of these damn people? You all take ‘door open’ a little too seriously.”

You laugh, feeling a little lighter. Pulling at the grass, you sigh. “You’re right, though. I either need to just tell him or let it go. I can’t just… suffer.”

“If only you’d come to that conclusion a while ago.”

“Bleh.”

Fresh air and the weight of Jeonghan’s words weigh down on you. You know that he’s right. Though you’re confident that Chan doesn’t return your feelings, you don’t explicitly know because you’ve never asked. And if you never ask, you’ll never know.

Calm settles over you as you decide your course of action. Blood and Popcorn is in two days - you can bring it up then.

Nodding to yourself, you pluck more grass out of the ground. “Alright,” you tell Jeonghan, heaving a sigh. “Thanks, Mom.”

“Ugh, you two! Don’t call me that!”

Hands shaking, you stare at your phone. You’ve had two days to mentally prepare for this evening and yet when you look at your phone, you think two days was not remotely enough to prepare for this evening. You haven’t spoken to Chan at all about what time you want to have your weekly hangout, but that’s not unusual.

The only thing unusual is your hesitation to hit the call button and ask what time he wants to come over. It’s such a simple thing - you don’t need to confess your feelings to him right now. But the anticipation of what inviting him over means and the possible disaster it can bring makes your fingers shaky.

Instead of hitting dial, you take one deep breath and let it out slowly. In slowly again, and-

Your phone starts ringing before you can finish the exhale. Your heart pounds in your throat when you see Chan’s name flash across your screen. For a few seconds there is pure panic, but you manage to collect yourself and slide your thumb across the screen. It takes a few tries, your hands clammy with anxiety as you answer.

“Hi!”

“Don’t kill me,” Chan immediately says on the other side of the line. You pause, cocking your head.

“Why would I do that?”

“I have to raincheck on Blood and Popcorn tonight.”

“Oh no, are you sick? Do you need me to bring anything over? Is Seungkwan-”

Chan laughs on the other side of the phone and your stomach flutters helplessly. You hear the creak of bed springs and you know he’s sitting on his bed. He has the world’s creakiest bed. “I’m not sick.”

“Oh.”

You frown, sitting down on your couch and folding your legs. There’s nothing else you can think of that Chan would cancel Blood and Popcorn for, so illness had seemed like the first rational thing. You feel a little embarrassed at immediately trying to take care of him, but push it away to ask, “What’s up?”

“I have a date. Tonight is the only night she was available for like two weeks. She’s in her first year of law school so her availability sucks.”

It feels like the air vanishes from the room. You lean back against the backrest on the couch, deflated. You hold the phone to your ear, but don’t feel the weight of it in your hand. The TV across the living room becomes a blur, the muted program in the background unrecognizable.

A date. Chan has a date. That he’s willing to cancel your night for.

You think back to that night at the diner when he told you to just go out with Joshua instead of doing Blood and Popcorn. How easily he pushed it aside. Like it was unimportant. Easily missed.

“Bambi?” Chan’s voice sounds distant through the roar of your emotions. “You there? The cell service in your apartment is so shitty.”

“I’m here.”

“Oh good. Sorry to miss, please don’t kill me. We can add two days of Blood and Popcorn next week to make up for it?”

“Yeah. Uh. Yeah.”

There’s a pause. “Are you okay?”

“Definitely.” Lie. “Sorry, I just woke up from a nap and I’m a little spacy.” Lie. “No problems here. I’m not mad. Enjoy your date.” Lie.

“Thanks, I’ll let you know how it goes after!”

“For sure.”

When Chan hangs up the phone, you think that Jeonghan was right. Crying alone is lame.

Chan can’t do this.

Sol isn’t the problem - at least not directly. She is beautiful and funny, sharp as a whip and has an edge to her that he loves in women. She is successful, has goals, and she’s sensible. And she’s into him, which is perhaps the biggest plus of all.

But she isn’t you. Sol’s biggest problem is that she’s not you, and it’s not really her problem at all. It is Chan’s and Chan’s alone, and he cannot sit through this date anymore. He’s tried for the last hour already, asking all of the right questions and laughing at all the right places, but he cannot stop the way he wonders if you’re watching buffy. He cannot help but wonder if you’re in those expensive pajamas you like, drinking inexpensive wine from the corner story, his favorite contrast.

Chan cannot stop thinking that his button up is a little too tight on his chest and the uncomfortable way his new shoes rub his ankle. He’d rather be in a tee and shorts, freshly showered and stretched out. He cannot stop blinking his eyes, hating the way one of his contacts is irritating him, wishing instead to be in glasses and the lowlight of your apartment.

From the moment he ended that call with you to cancel Blood and Popcorn, all he’s felt is dread. Dread for the upcoming date with someone he should be excited about, dread for telling you how it goes, dread for having to be in public with people and to get to know someone, dread at what happens at the end of the date, does he have to kiss her? Does he have to go get ice cream? What does he do-

“Are you okay?” Sol’s raspy voice draws him from his thoughts - not for the first time that night. She’s leaning back in her seat, dark eyes pinning him to the spot. She is as sharp as she is beautiful, and normally someone like Sol would make him trip over his feet. “You zoned out.”

“I apologize, that was rude of me.”

“It was,” she agrees. She swirls the wine in her glass, looking him up and down before giving him a sympathetic smile. “I won’t be offended if you want to call this off early.”

“What?”

“You’re not interested,” she asserts. Confident. Self-assured. “It’s totally okay if it’s not working for you.”

Heat crawls up the side of Chan’s neck. He runs his sweaty palms over his slacks. “I am so sorry,” he says earnestly. “This sounds so stupid to say, but it is me, it isn’t you.”

“No offense, but I know. You’ve been distracted since we got here. You obviously have something or someone else on your mind.”

“That easy to read, huh?”

“Open book. I have some pride, though. Let’s pay the bill?”

“I’m sorry.”

Her grin is polite. Understanding. “Don’t be. You’re cute and nice, but I cannot suffer knowing your mind isn’t on me.”

“Understandable.”

Chan knows he’s lucky. Anyone else a little less level-headed or less confident might have made him suffer. As it is, Sol does let him suffer a little, sliding the bill over to him with a knowing grin. He likes Sol - not like he likes you, but she’s good people.

“Promise me one thing?” Sol asks before ducking into her Uber. “It’ll help my pride.”

“Sure.”

“Go spend the rest of the evening with whoever it is and make sure you tell them how you feel. It’ll be worth it, that way.”

Chan grins. “Alright. I promise.”

And he does intend to hold to that promise. Something about tonight is different. He can feel it as he walks quickly to his car, undoing the top button of his shirt as he goes. The air is crisp and there are still a few streaks of orange in the night sky, the sun long gone.

Chan calls you as he turns his car onto the road, heading toward your apartment on the northside of down. He drums his fingers along the steering wheel, buzzing with nervous and excited energy as the line rings. When you don’t pick up, he ends the call.

Jeonghan was right - he usually is. Chan could either tell you how he feels or live with the consequences, and he’s decided he cannot live with the consequences. He cannot sit across the table from someone who isn’t you and pretend that he isn’t wondering what you’re doing. He cannot look at the curve of someone else’s mouth and wonder what it would be like if it were yours.

The date had been spurred by the intense wave of jealousy and inadequacy he felt at Jeonghan’s party when he saw you sitting on the couch with Joshua. He has no idea how else he would have had the confidence to start chatting up someone as commanding as Sol, but he was powered by rum and a wounded heart.

Stupid. It was stupid, he realizes now. He has been stupid so many times regarding you and for long enough that even Joshua, the most polite of his friends, felt like they could respectfully intercept you, now.

Well, perhaps you will choose Joshua instead. Chan is fine with that. What you want has always been paramount to him. But if you choose Joshua, it will be with the knowledge that Chan loves you and he always has.

Steeling himself, he gets out of the car at your apartment complex and looks up at the building. He can see the lights on in your living room, confirming you’re still home and probably watching Buffy. The thought sends a thrill through him and he smiles, shaking his head and taking a deep breath.

“You’ve got this, Lee Chan,” he tells himself. “You’ve got this.”

A loud knock on your door startles you. You finish blowing your nose in the issue, trying to suck up the rest of your tears. Pulling the sleeves of your sweater - Chan’s sweater - over your hands, you wipe your face with sweater paws, trying to erase some evidence of your tears before having to face the delivery person.

Grabbing the bills on the counter, you wonder how many people delivering food have seen people answer the door while crying or immediately after crying. Honestly, they’ve probably seen all types of strange situations, which makes you feel a little bit about answering the door after very clearly sobbing.

Unlatching the top and flipping the deadbolt, you yank the door open, prepared to not make eye contact to make it a little less awkward for you and the person just trying to hand you pizza and soda, except-

“Chan?”

It is Chan standing outside of your door. You blink in surprise, giving him a quick once over. He looks really nice, dressed in slacks and a black button up shirt that is a little too tight across the chest - not that you’re complaining - and the top of the buttons undone to reveal the necklace you gifted him. His dark hair has styling product in it, pushing it out of his face, save for a small rebel strand that hangs over his eyebrow.

Chan looks… beautiful. You’re suddenly very aware that you’re in his sweatshirt and sweatpants, face swollen from crying, nose a little snotty and looking worse for wear.

“What are you doing here?”

“Why are you crying?”

Chan pushes his way into your apartment and you let him, dropping your arm as he passes by. He shuts the door for you, flipping the latch and lock out of habit as he turns to you. He reaches out to grab you by the shoulders but you back up a little, suddenly terrified of his touch.

He notices. “Why are you crying?” he asks again, dark brows knitted and mouth twisted in a frown. “Talk to me.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be on a date?”

“Left early, wasn’t working. What’s going on?”

You swallow thickly, realizing you’re at a crossroads. Silence stretches between you as he waits for your answer, looking at you with so much concern that you begin to crack. The tension in your throat returns, the telltale sign of tears and you ball your fists, nails digging into your palms.

A torrent of feelings bombard you. Anger. Hurt. Desire. Relief. Hurt again.

“You canceled Blood and Popcorn.”

Chan opens and closes his mouth, head cocking to the side a little bit. He looks mystified, trying to put together the pieces to the puzzle. “I don’t understand.”

“You canceled Blood and Popcorn for something else. For someone else.”

“I-”

A series of emotions flit over his face. You feel your heart pounding wildly in your chest as you watch each one, trying to catch them as they go. Confusion. Thoughtfulness. Confusion. Realization. You watch as he drinks you in, the tears, the wet stains from crying on the shirt, your words. Slowly, Chan puts the pieces together for the entire picture, and his face becomes so soft that you nearly cringe.

“Oh, Bambi.”

“You can date whoever you want, you’re not mine,” you punch out, wiping a tear as it escapes your eye. Feeling small, you back away from him a little, breaking eye contact. “But it hurts when you shove me aside like that. Look, I know we’re friends, but-”

“Bambi,” he says gently. You’re not looking at him, but you know that tone. The pleading. He’s begging you to stop, you think, but if you don’t get this out now you never will.

“Blood and Popcorn is important to me. You’re important to me. I know you’ve never seen me as more than a friend, but Chan-”

Chan interrupts you again. This time though, it’s by crashing against you. You nearly topple over onto the coffee table with the force of it, but you cling to him, digging your hands into the meat of his biceps to hold yourself to him. His hands press into the small of your back, sending a bolt of electricity to you that you can’t pay any attention to, because Chan presses his mouth against yours softly, stealing all of your thoughts.

For a second, your brain goes static. You’re so stunned you don’t do anything but cling to him, vacantly aware that the softness of his lips are on yours. Tentative. Questioning.

Chan pulls away and your eyes flutter open. He is only an inch away from your face, his minty breath fanning your lips as he begins to apologize, panic on his face. You interrupt him this time, surging forward to crash your lips to his, far less gentle than he had been the first time.

The box you’ve shoved every feeling for Chan cracks open. You feel everything pour out of it, a steady stream of want as you press into him. He smells like teakwood and mint, hypnotizing you. His mouth is soft and eager, sucking gently against your bottom lip.

Everything feels lighter, like gravity has lost all meaning. Chan pulls away from your mouth a little, close enough to brush your lips against his in a feather-light kiss, but enough to gaze down at you through half lidded eyes.

“The date didn’t work out because I kept thinking of you,” he whispers, voice shaking. You feel your breath stop as he speaks, each word sinking in. “It was stupid to ask her out. I was feeling insecure about Joshua asking you out, and it was stupid and petty-”

You kiss him again. He smiles into the kiss, letting you lead him, slow and lazy. You feel his tongue brush against the seam of your lips and you eagerly let him in, toes curling as he licks into your mouth.

“I just want you,” Chan admits, breaking away for a quick breath of air. He presses his lips against the corner of your mouth, your jaw, your cheek. He peppers your face in them as his hands skate up your back, hot even through the material of his sweatshirt. “I have for so long and I’ve been so afraid to tell you.”

“I was afraid too.��

“I have wasted so much time.” His hands cradle your face, turning you to look at him.

Chan is so earnest. Raw honestly glitters in his eyes. Deeper, hiding beneath the surface is something a little darker and more intense. Want. Desire. Something that lingers, waiting for you to call it forward. You love him so much that in that moment you almost cry more, feeling overwhelmed with everything you’ve buried down for years.

“I want to make up for it,” you whisper, stealing a kiss that is more teeth than anything. He makes a noise in the back of his throat. Your hands sink to his waist, gripping at the fabric of his shirt. “I was actually going to tell you tonight, before you canceled.”

“What a stupid man I am.”

You smirk a little. “Yes.”

“Let me apologize,” he murmurs, voice low. You feel yourself shiver as he pushes you toward your room, connecting your mouths again. The kiss is messy and needy, so different than the one moments before. You tangle together, stumbling toward your room. “I’ll make it up to you.”

“Oh?”

The crash landing onto your mattress is not graceful. Chan’s full weight falls on top of you and your foreheads smack a little. You yelp in paint and Chan groans, burying his face in your neck. You can’t help the laughter that bubbles to the surface, exploding out of you as your hands press flat on his back, soothing as you hold him to you.

“First step of apologizing,” you wheeze under him. “Give her a concussion.”

“I’m sorry,” he says, burying his face further in embarrassment. “I’m a little eager.”

His breath tickles your neck, making you squirm under him. He seems to notice, opting to press open-mouthed kisses against your throat. You hum, eyelids fluttering at the stimulation. “It’s okay,” you breathe, fingers turning to claws against his back. “It’s cute.”

Chan leans off of you, properly supporting himself with arms on either side of your head, caging you in. His knee slots between your legs, making your stomach leap in excitement as he scoots it up a little, almost pressing against you.

“You’re cute,” he notes, kisses getting messy as they go up your neck toward your ear. He nips your ear and you let out a sound. His laughter is warm against you and you shiver. “You’re in my clothes.”

“I wear them all the time.”

He groans. “I know. Fuck I know.”

“Is that what does it for you?” You move your hands from his back to his waist, pulling the tucked shirt from the waistband of his slacks. His hips twitch forward, excited. He busies his mouth with pressing wet kisses to your jaw. “Me in your clothes?”

“Everything does it for me. I am down horrendous for you.”

“I really didn’t know.”

He moves a hand to pull at the collar of his sweatshirt, exposing more of your collarbones to him as he kisses. “Everyone else did,” he assures you. You hiss when he bites down and licks over the sting, looking up through dark lashes to gauge your reaction. You nod a little and he grins, doing it again. “Biting. Got it.”

With trembling fingers, you work the buttons on his shirt. You steal touches as you go, greedy for him. Too long have you hidden what you want in the shadows, too long have you resisted this. Now, you take.

You brush your fingers against the flexing muscle of his stomach as you pull at the shirt, making him moan deep in his throat. His skin is like fire as you brush your fingers across its warmth, shoving his shirt off. He leans up, letting it fall from his shoulders, rippling to the ground.

The light from your hall glows behind Chan, haloing him in golden light. Your breath catches in your chest as your fingers press to his skin, brush over his shoulders and chest, down his stomach. You feel him twitch beneath your hands but he lets you explore, breathing hard under your reverence.

Golden boy, so full of fire. It’s all you can think of as you stare up at him, equal parts light and dark in your bedroom. Your hands drop to his belt and you tug him to you, desperate for him.

“Kiss me,” you beg.

He does. His mouth is greedy, stealing your breath. A thrill shoots through you when he slides his knee up higher, pressing it between your legs. You breath the kiss to gasp at the barest amount of pressure and Chan grins, watching your reaction through a heavy gaze.

“Take this off for me,” he asks, voice raspy. He pulls at the hem of his sweatshirt on your frame. “Please.”

You lean up, pressing your mouth to his collarbone in a sweet kiss as you pull the shirt over your head. He helps you, tossing it somewhere else. His hands go to your sides, fingers tracing up your curves as he pushes you back down, claiming your mouth again.

It feels like you might go crazy. Your bare chest presses against his, the friction turning your blood to liquid fire. His knee is firm between your legs, and when his hand slips to your waist, squeezing you and urging you to roll your hips you can’t help but let out a moan in the shape of his name, helpless.

“Fuck,” he swears, dropping his forehead to your shoulder as he helps you move against his thigh. “If you say my name like that again I might bust in my fucking pants.”

“Chan.”

“Don’t,” he laughs, biting your shoulder. “I want this so bad.”

“I want you.”

“I might pass out due to sheer joy.”

“I have some ideas on how to revive you.”

He lets out a swear and you laugh. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

“Maybe.”

Truth is, you think he might be the death of you. You’d die happily in his arms, completely swept up in the feeling of Chan’s tongue as it skates across your skin and up the swell of your breast. When he pauses, you look down at him. He smirks, happy to have your attention before he flicks his tongue lightly over the peak of your nipple.

You squeeze your legs around his thigh, back bowing off the bed. He lets out a chuckle, repeating the flicking motion as he watches you with dark, satisfied eyes. It drives you insane, the way he watches you with equal parts reverence and determination to find out what makes you squirm.

Chan is a fast learner. His teeth scrape against your nipple and you whine, thrashing under him as he teases you, pulling gently. The sting feels so good, making you melt into the mattress underneath him. He makes a sound of appreciation, sucking gently and sending you to the moon before trailing his mouth toward your other breast.

The hand on your hip squeezes you, reminding you why it had been there in the first place. “Keep going.” His breath fans against your skin and you tremble. “I like seeing you worked up.”

“God,” you whisper, trying to roll your hips against his leg again. It feels so good but it’s not enough, and as he sucks greedily at your chest you feel like you might rip at the seams. “Who knew you were so… this.”

You feel his wet grin against you, tongue flicking against your pert nipple. Your head falls to the side as you pant, trying to catch your fucking breath.

Of course he can reduce you to nothing so easily. No one knows you better than Chan, the two of you like twin flames. Every touch of his tongue, every press of his fingers into your skin, every breath of your name on his lips were made to unravel you because it’s Chan. Your Chan.

Your Chan who gently pulls the sweatpants from your hips, groaning low and slow when he sees the way your panties stick to your folds. Your Chan who kisses and bites the softness of your thighs, breath ghosting across sensitive flesh, fingers prying your legs apart when they start to twitch shut.

You’d always been made for him. To think otherwise was folly. You know that now, hand gripping his bones tight as he pulls your hands to the side, the cold air hitting your aching cunt. He lets you squeeze his hand, not caring that your gripping is bone-breaking.

“Hmm.” He looks up at you and you look down at him. His eyes are blown and he grins, shaking his head a little. “This for me?” You nod, your thoughts banging around the near empty space in your head as you do. “Fuck.”

And then his tongue presses against you, flat and warm and fuck fuck fuck. You can barely function as Chan drags his tongue slowly up your pussy, avoiding your clit entirely before dragging it back down. He makes a sound in his throat that sounds like a whine and you nearly lose it there, driven insane by him.

Chan takes the hand he has linked with yours and rests it on your hip, pressing into you to keep you still. You buck under his mouth and he laughs, unbothered as he looks up at you. The vision of him between your legs makes you dizzy, his hair mused, tongue pressed between your folds, eyes starving.

Your other hand grips his wrist where his opposite hand holds you open. You cling to him, thighs twitching as he licks you at his leisure. His mouth is a weapon, bringing you to the edge of insane easily. When he closes his lips around your clit and sucks gently, you fear you might break.

He can sense it too, setting himself to the task of pushing you over the edge. Chan learns you so quickly - maybe just knows you intuitively - alternating between circling his tongue around your throbbing bundle of nerves and sucking on it gently.

“I am going to die,” you gasp between ragged breaths. “Your fucking mouth.”

“Yeah? Feels good?” The buzz of his words drive right into your lower stomach where your orgasmed has so much compacted pressure you know you’re going to snap any moment. “Taste so good. I could eat this pussy all fucking night.”

“Fuck, Chan. I’m gonna come.”

He gives a harsh suck to your cunt, the wet sound obscene. “Good.”

“Like that.”

“Yeah?” he asks, panting. He does it again, following your instruction. Your mouth falls open as you nod, unable to string together more than. “Mmm.”

Chan doubles his effort, the wet sounds of his mouth making it all the harder to keep it together. He keeps you in place as best as he can, but his little hums of pleasure and the combination of his mouth and tongue send your orgasm slamming into you.

You think you say his name. You have no idea if anything comes out at all. You come hard, thrashing against the bed as he licks you through it, uncaring. Every nerve in your body is on fire, limbs tingling as you float in the momentary high of your peak before you start to come back down, breathing raggedly.

A cramp throbs in your fingers that are still twisted in Chan’s grip. You loosen your grip a little bit, feeling a little bad about almost snapping his fingers. He doesn’t seem to mind, head still between your legs, tongue gentle and pressed against your twitching entrance. He avoids your clit, letting you catch your breath.

“Chan,” you mumble. He lifts his head, your arousal spread across his mouth. He is a mess, spiking your need for him. You pull at him, wild. “Kiss me.”

He doesn’t hesitate. He scrambles up to you, letting go of your hand in favor of cradling your face. The kiss is hungry and wet, your heady taste on his mouth as you drink him in. You don’t care, desperate to have him close, pulling him into you.

One of your hands snakes between your bodies, pressing against the firm outline of his cock through his pants. He lets out a whine, shaking his head as he breaks the kiss, breathing heavy.

“Don’t,” he begs. “I will cum right now.”

“Oh?”

“I’m so serious, I almost came untouched.”

“Wow, I really do it for you, huh?”

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.” His sincerity makes you flush and you peck him on the lips. “I cannot promise I will not come apart after a single stroke.”

“Don’t care.” You undo his belt, pulling. “Want it. Want you. Please don’t make me wait.”

He curses. “I can deny you nothing.” He sees your wicked grin and shakes his head, laughing as he pulls away to kick out of his pants. “You like having me wrapped around your finger, huh?”

“You’re not the only one whipped.” He looks at you, doubtful. “You think I share my fries with anyone? Be so real, Chan. That’s something only you can do.”

“Got it. French fry privileges, what else can I weaponize?”

You don’t answer his question, distracted by him as he peels his briefs off and fists his heavy cock. You lick your lips, drinking in the length and thickness of him, the sticky, swollen tip, the way he pumps himself when he kneels on the bed again.

“Hmm?” he asks, noticing you're distracted. “Everything okay?”

“You have a nice dick,” you blurt. He pauses, raising his brows, thighs pressed to the back of yours. You fold your lips flat, a little embarrassed by your outburst. “Thank you is the proper response to a compliment.”

He bursts into laughter and you can’t help but join him, covering your face as it heats up. “Don’t hide from me, wanna see you,” he teases, grabbing your hands and pulling them from your face. He pins them above your head. “And thank you.”

Chan runs the head of his cock along your sticky folds, both of you moaning in unison. His hand still pins yours above your head, making you feel open and vulnerable. Your knees squeeze his hips as he ruts against you a little, eyes focused while he uses his other end to guide himself to your entrance.

“Mmm,” the sound escapes you as he presses in, the ache in your core doubling for a second as he sinks further. “Fuuuck.”

“Okay?”

“Very. Just- slow.”

“You got it, baby.”

The term of endearment hits you low in the stomach. Between him whispering baby and sinking into the hilt, you don’t know what drives you crazier. The easy answer is just Chan. It’s simply Chan who does this to you, who turns you inside out, who reduces you to a whimpering mess.

Chan lets go of your hands and brings it to your face. He leans down, supported by the other hand as he kisses you gently, letting you adjust to his girth, pussy spasming around him as you try to keep it together. The kiss is slow and sweet, in contrast to the feral kiss you shared earlier.

“Fuck,” he breaths against you mouth, laughing. He presses his forehead against yours. “You’re fucking squeezing me. I might die.”

You do it on purpose this time and he hisses, all of his muscles clenching. “Like that?”

“Doonnn’t. If I come right now I’ll be so embarrassed.”

“Why? It’s just me.”

“I don’t want to one-stroke my dream girl, are you serious?”

“Dream girl, huh?” He pulls out a little before shallow thrusting back in. “Mmm yeah. That feels good.”

Instead of answering your jest, he kisses you slowly. His strokes are slow but deep, making you sigh. He feels so good, having him like this. Chan presses his body against you, melding the two of you. You wrap your legs around his waist, squeezing to keep him as close as possible.

Your name falls from his lips as you move in sync. You can feel his heart pounding in his chest, feel him shake in your hands. He buries his face in your neck, mouth pressed against your skin as he breathes heavily. You cling to him, as though you could press your love into him, as though you can transfer it through touch.

Chan slides a hand between the two of you, reaching down to circle your clit gently. You whimper in surprise, squeezing around him and drawing out a low sound. “I’m gonna come soon,” he murmurs. “Do you have another one, baby? Can you try for me?”

You nod. He presses his lips to your temple, driving his hips faster, fingers firm. You feel yourself wind up again, desperate to catch up to Chan, to give him what he wants, to come undone together. You’d do anything for him - anything he asked. You always have.

A glint of metal catches your eye. You see the necklace you gifted him hanging around his neck, tapping his collarbone in time with his movements. The sight of it makes you possessive, your desire for him surging. Gripping the back of his neck, you bring his mouth to yours. You don’t kiss him, but your mouths are pressed together as you mutter, “I love you, you know?”

He groans, hips stuttering, fingers firm. You’re so close, you feel yourself right on that edge again. “I do know,” he admits, his cock pressing that perfect spot inside of you that has the room spinning. “I love you too, you know?”

You feel him smile against you. The kiss he gives you is so gentle that it sends you over the edge. You hold him tight, coming undone around him as he groans into your mouth, unraveling with you. When he stills, you keep holding him to you, his embrace warm.

Chan nudges your nose with his. You open your eyes to find his dark ones peering at you. You smile, lifting a hand to trace your fingers along his jaw, the gentle slope of his nose, the roundness of his cheeks. You note the faint freckles under his eyes, his long lashes, the way one side of his lips lifts before the other when he smiles.

“Hmm?” he asks.

“You’re so pretty.” You trace your finger to his nose and then flick it. He frowns and pulls away, making you laugh. “There is cum leaking down my leg to my ass.” He thrusts once sharply and you whine. “Chaaaan.”

“Hmmm?”

“Can we shower?”

“We?”

You grin. “You speak French?”

“I speak pussy.”

“Ew, get off of me!” you laugh, hitting him in the shoulder. He laughs too, rolling off and pulling out. “Take me to the shower, you loser.”

“Oui.”

“Then I want to watch Buffy - oh no.”

“What?” He stands and reaches a hand out to you, helping you up. “Are you alright?”

“I ordered pizza and they probably tried to deliver.”

“That’s okay.” He pulls you toward the shower and smacks your ass lightly, making you yelp. “Start the shower, I’ll call and get it re-delivered.”

You pause, looking at him, unable to bite back the smile. “I love you.”

“Mhmm. Love you too, Bambi.”

“I know I’m good looking,” Chan murmurs, eyes on the screen. “But you’re staring very hard at me.”

You’re laying against his chest, head tilted up to look at him. You can’t help it, watching the blue light from the TV dance across his face, reflected in the glasses he put on after the shower. His hair is still damp and fluffy, skin glistening from the skincare post-shower.

“You are good looking.”

“Damn. Only like me for the looks?”

“Well your jokes aren’t very good.”

He levels you with a glare and you laugh, kissing him quickly before settling down in his arms again. His embrace is warm and he smells like your shampoo. You press yourself into him further and he grunts, letting you.

“Can we do Blood and Popcorn forever?” you ask, watching him fondly. He smiles and kisses your forehead, flooding you with warmth. “Please?”

“Anything you ask, baby. Blood and Popcorn forever.”

PERMANENT TAG LIST:

@jespecially @asyre @eoieopda @todorokiskitten @pyeonghongrie-main @sebbyswifu @softiesoga

NOTE: If yo don't see your tag here and you've requested one, your. tag is not working.

#lee chan smut #chan smut #dino smut #dino svt #svt smut #chan x reader #dino reader #dino fanfic #svt fanfic #sventeen smut #minors dni #minors do not interact

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dinogoofymutated · 5 months

Note

Hi!! I LOVE your Remy hcs! They were so sweet and in character 😊 I'm on my period and ya girl is suffering and I keep thinking that Remy would be the sweetest AND totally amazing in the fried food department 👀 Any hcs? Totally chill if nah

Gambit/AFAB!reader!- Period HCS YES!!! just yes. absolutlely. I want to taste this man's cooking so bad but I am ridiculously sensitive to spice and would probably die.

I have a similar req for Nightcrawler as well so keep an eye out for that one too ;) Sorry that this is a little short!

TWS: Menstrual cycles. Cramps. Menstrual cravings. Damn I'm hungry rn ngl. Can be read as GN as no pronouns are mentioned.

If cooking Isn't one of Remy's love languages I'm calling bull!!

I mean, who else would go out of their way to cook beignets for breakfast? I mean, sure, he could have made the dough beforehand but seriously that shit takes time.

I 100% believe he would go out of his way to make you anything you were craving on your period. Fried chicken? Done. Beignets? Obviously. Done! Hell, you want stuffed french toast but every time you try to make it you fail miserably? Don't worryyy! He's got you.

Although, that doesn't mean he does it for free!! He asks for payment via smooches and love. He tends to stray away from period sex until he knows you're comfortable with it, and if you are comfortable with it he's always there to offer his assistance if you need an all natural pain killer ;)

Mother nature fucking sucked. It wasn't enough that you had to deal with blood leaking out of you every month, but debilitating cramps on top of that? Straight bullshit!

You've been cocooned under your blankets all morning, curled up into a fetal position as you delt with the intense cramps. You've already taken the last of the painkillers you kept in your bedside table, and unfortunate for you, they were not working. You know you've certainly missed breakfast by now, but you just hurt too much to get up. You're face down on your pillow when there's a quick knock at your door before it opens.

"Good morning, Chère~" Remy sings. You cant really respond to him other than giving him a tired hum. You hear the door shut behind him before the sound of him placing a plate on your bedside table.

" 'Figured you weren't feeling well when you weren't at the table, so I've brought you the Gambit special." He jokes. You feel the bed shift with his weight as his sits next to you, running his hand up and down your back soothingly.

"Thanks Rem." You mumble. If only you could bring yourself to sit up. You can smell the sweet scent of the beignets he had brought you, and it makes your stomach growl loudly. You wince as another wave of pain hits you coincidentally, and you're absolutely sure your body was planning to kill you.

" S' pretty bad, huh?" Remy asks, a comforting hand brushing the hair out of your face. You nod.

"Alright, c'mere." You don't have a chance to refuse as Remy is sitting you up, making space so he can sit against your headboard. You're blearily blinking your eyes open as he drags you into his lap, propping you up against his chest. You send him a groggy, questioning look, but he only responds with catching you in a chaste kiss.

"What? You didn't think I was gonna let my favorite person suffer alone, did you?" He asks, sending you a smile that you can't help but return. Remy feeds you your breakfast like that, keeping you snug and safe between his arms as he gives you plenty of kisses and rubs your lower stomach through each wave of pain. Those painkiller never did kick in, but at least you had someone sweet to distract you for a while.

#x men 97 #x men #x men comics #x men headcannons #x men 97 x reader #remy lebeau #gambit #x men gambit #gambit imagine #gambit x reader #remy lebeau headcanons #remy lebeau headcannons #remy lebeau imagine #remy lebeau x reader #x men remy lebeau

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aurorawritestoescape · 1 month

Note

So i couldnt sleep so my mind went rambling abt bad blood tommy fucking reader while on facetime w joel. (Like yk filming reader if that makes sence.) And tommy MAYBE brat taming her a little bit or smt and joel telling him what to do or smt. (You can ignore that last part lol)

BAD BLOOD extra || Tommy’s visit || 2,1k happens after part 6 | can be read alone

Pairing: step uncle Joel Miller x f!reader x stepdad Tommy Miller

Tw: 18+ mdni, smut, fluff, step-cest, age gap (reader is 22, Joel and Tommy are in their late and mid-40s), brat tamer!Tommy, mean!Joel, voyeurism, exhibitionism, unprotected piv, consensual ass spanking, creampies, degradation, praise kink, daddy kink, ass play, swearing, smoking. The pics are for the mood only. Reader has no specific physical descriptions.

A/n: thank you for the delicious thots and inspo, lovely nonnie!💖😘I’m not gonna ignore the last part bc it’s hot af! Hugs to @milla-frenchy for beta-ing😘 Love you all!❤️ dividers by @saradika-graphics

Part 6 || SERIES MASTERLIST || MASTERLIST

Tommy’s visiting you while you’re at college and he got a hotel room for you two for a whole weekend, starting Friday. After a few weeks apart and numerous phone sex sessions you couldn’t take your hands off each other. You lost count how many times Tommy made you come on his tongue, his fingers, his cock.

Fucked out of your mind, you’re lying naked on your front in the bed, nibbling on some French fries that you ordered to the room.

“Let’s call uncle Joel,” you offer, smiling at Tommy who’s resting next to you, leaning against the headboard, drinking water and stealing your fries from time to time. He’s naked as well and you marvel at his golden skin, glistening with sweat, his long dark curls, some stuck to his forehead and neck.

“You miss him?” he asks, grabbing his phone off the nightstand.

No way you will admit it so you answer with a shrug. Over the weeks apart Joel and you phoned each other too. Your calls were much shorter than with your stepdad and consisted of him making you come by degrading you over the phone, while your vibrator was pressed to your clit or your fingers were playing with your pussy. He never jerked off though. ‘I ain’t a fucking teenager to jack off over the phone like that,” he always said. But you could bet that as soon as he hung up, his hand darted to his throbbing cock.

When Joel picks up the phone, you hear music and people talking loudly. It’s Friday night so of course he’s at some bar. Tommy greets him and the noises get quiet when the older brother apparently steps outside.

“Hey, uncle Joel,” you purr, when Tommy passes you the phone. Joel gives you a trace of a smile, his face illuminated by the dim street light. He’s looking handsome and smug as always, with a lit cigarette hanging off his lower lip.

“Tommy, why is this little slut still talking?” he raises his voice so his brother could hear. “You’ve been there all day, she shoulda been in a cock coma by now.”

Tommy shakes his head, mumbling ‘Jesus’ and you roll your eyes.

“Stop it, daddy’s made my pussy very happy.”

Joel hums in disbelief and you pout your lips.

“Why haven’t you come with him?”

“I have work this weekend, angel. Need to get some dough so when you visit us I can spoil you like a princess.”

“Really?” You beam at the screen.

“Hell no! Ima spend it on hookers and blow,” he chuckles.

“Fuck you,” you curse at him and throw the phone back to Tommy.

You turn over on your back and with your brows furrowed, start angrily chewing on a fry.

“Second, Joel,” Tommy mumbles, crawls to you and slowly gets between your thighs, the phone still in his hand.

“You know he’s joking, right? We can't wait for you to visit us in Austin.”

Tommy’s warm smile softens your attitude and you slide lower to wrap your legs around his hips, pressing your cum filled pussy to his already hardening cock.

He takes it as an invitation, which it absolutely is, and glides his pink tip between your slicked up pussy lips, massaging your clit and drawing needy whimpers out of your half-opened mouth.

“Look at this, Joel,” Tommy smirks, turning the phone and directing the camera to your cunt, hugging his stiff cock.

“Damn, angel,” you hear your step uncle respond.

Then Tommy slowly changes the phone's angle so your step uncle could see your naked body, squirming against the messy sheets.

You look at the screen, eyes already glossy with lust and bliss, and bite your lip, hearing a loud growl, coming out of Joel's mouth at the sight of your puffy wet folds, being used by his brother, your heaving belly, your hickey-covered tits and pebbled nipples.

“Looking hot, baby,” you hear him compliment you and almost come at how rare and thus more delicious it is.

“Thank you, uncle,” you breathe out and suddenly cry out when Tommy roughly pushes his cock into your weeping hole, taking you by surprise.

“Daddy!”

“Yes, my love?” Tommy gives you a naughty smile, rolling his hips into you and you smile back. The way he fills you is so satisfying, it makes your pussy greedily clench and gush more around his cock .

“How is she?” Joel asks, and you hear him take a drag of his cigarette.

Tommy turns the camera back to himself and talks to his brother, while his cock is languidly sliding in and out of your soft cunt.

“She’s heaven, Joel. You’re missing out.”

At this point you’re not sure if they’re talking about you or your pussy, which turns you on even more.

“Yeah, fuck, ya know that we need to get that contract. I’m meeting them tomorrow morning.”

To your shock they start discussing the upcoming deal and your jaw drops in astonishment.

“Hello! Your dick’s inside me! Can you talk shop later?” you grunt at Tommy and hear Joel’s gruff voice.

“Shut it, angel. Grownups are talking.”

Tommy gives you an apologetic smile but then continues speaking to Joel.

Anger boils up in your stomach and you plant your foot on Tommy's chest and push yourself off his cock. The man hisses, apparently in pain from your sudden movement. But you couldn’t care less. How dare he? you think, feeling hurt and offended.

You roll over on your belly, grab a handful of fries and shove them into your mouth.

“What the fuck, babygirl? Ouch,” Tommy growls behind you.

“Whatever.”

“Come on, sweetheart. I’ve just asked him a couple of questions. It’s important.”

“Fucking brat,” Joel comments on the phone and you grind your teeth.

Trying to soothe you, Tommy rubs the back of your thigh with his warm hand.

“My cock’s hard and waiting for you, my love.”

“I don’t give a fuck,” you bite back and Tommy throws the phone on the bed next to you.

Suddenly he plops down on top of you, pressing you into the mattress with his heavy body.

“He’s right. You are a fucking little brat,” he hisses in your ear and grabs your arms with his strong hands, when you try to lift your torso to push him off. “I’ve been railing this needy cunt all day and you can’t give me a few seconds?”

He bucks his hips against your ass and you moan, feeling his huge cock dig between your asscheeks.

“Daddy,” you whimper in defeat.

“Bitch needs to be punished, brother,” Joel’s modulated voice is egging Tommy on.

“Ain’t he right, sweetie?” Tommy grunts, his hot breath fanning your cheek.

Your mischievous smile tells him everything he needs to know and he commands, lifting his torso off you and sitting up.

“Ass up, babygirl!”

He slaps your asscheek and you whine, when the vibrations pleasure your sensitive pussy.

You do as you’re told and grab the phone with a naughty smile, before placing it against the headboard, letting Joel see what your stepdad is about to do to you.

“Should I spank this minx, Joel?”

“Fuck yeah! This brat’s begging to be disciplined. Right, little slut?”

“Yes, please, daddy, uncle,” you obediently breathe out, wiggling your pushed up ass.

It immediately earns you a slap from Tommy and you moan.

“Shall I keep going, sweetie?” Tommy asks and you hastily nod.

Another slap lands on your ass and then another and another.

“Fuck, wish I could join you, brother,” Joel groans. “I’d give it to her good.”

Tommy spares you, his hits are not that hard, but after having the same spot spanked a few times, you feel heat and ache spread over your skin.

“Daddy,” you whine and he glides his palms over the globs of your ass in a soothing gesture.

“Will you interrupt me again, babygirl?” he asks and slaps your burning asscheek.

“No, daddy!”

“Good girl,” Tommy praises as his hand runs over your spine and squeezes the back of your neck.

“And never get off this cock until I’m done with you. Understand?”

You nod your head, noticing Joel smirk on the screen.

“We should punish her more often, brother. Pity that the slut loves it too much.”

You stick your tongue out at Joel and turn to Tommy.

“Fuck me, daddy. Please.”

“Of course, sweetheart. Your hole’s been clenching the whole time I’ve been slapping your sexy ass. She’s so needy.”

“She is daddy—ahhh,” you purr and moan as he inserts his fat cock into your cunt and begins thrusting into you hard and fast.

“Pussy’s already full of my cum. So wet. Gonna give you more, sweetie.”

“Yeah, ruin this cunt, Tommy,” Joel growls and you stare at his handsome face with half-lidded eyes, reveling in the sensation of Tommy’s cock massaging your walls, and Joel’s black gaze, watching you getting railed.

“Angel,” you hear his voice, calling you. “Can you do something for your dear uncle?”

“Yeah?”

“Stick two fingers into your ass for me.”

You curse, getting more turned on.

“Good idea, Joel,” you hear Tommy’s strained voice as he must be close to coming.

“Get the phone,” Joel says to his younger brother and soon he has a perfect view of your ass and pussy, stretched around Tommy’s cock.

You bring your hand to your asshole and mewl,

“Daddy, help.”

“Of course, my love,” your stepdad coos at you and spreads your asscheeks with his thick fingers, giving you a better access to your tight hole and then spitting right on it.

You jerk at the sensation of his saliva hitting your puckered hole and sliding down your crack. You spread the liquid over and slowly push the tip of your middle finger inside.

“Relax, baby,” Tommy says, slowing down the pace of his cock inside your cunt. Your ass is tight but you take a deep breath, follow his advice, and soon your whole digit sinks into your asshole.

“Yeahhh. Good little slut,” you hear Joel and smile, your cheek pressed to the bed.

Your loud moans fill the room when you begin moving your middle finger at the same speed that Tommy picks up, fucking your pussy.

“Angel, add another one, c’mon,” Joel grunts. “Tommy, faster.”

Joel is directing his brother, who’s fucking his ex stepdaughter. Your juices are sliding down your inner thighs, your eyes roll back while your asshole is getting filled with two fingers. Tommy begins rutting his manhood into your cunt relentlessly, chasing his orgasm, while you are self-fucking your ass.

“Like that, open up that tight hole, angel. Get it nice and ready for your uncle’s fat cock. What a good little slut for us.”

Both of your holes clench hard at his words and it sends Tommy over the precipice.

“Oh yeahhh,” he moans and starts spilling his hot cum into your pussy. The warmth of his load and the squirts, hitting your walls, make you explode on his cock and your fingers. You scream and whimper, while your pussy is getting flooded with Tommy’s thick seed, and your asshole is clamping tight around your fingers.

Tommy finishes emptying his balls into your pulsating cunt and pulls out as your fingers leave your asshole too. You both collapse on the bed, panting and smiling at each other.

“Guess my work there ‘s done. Bye, lovebirds,” you hear Joel’s voice, coming from the phone, lost somewhere in the sheets.

“Wait, wait!” You hastily search for it and when you succeed, ask Joel, your eyes glinting with mischief,

“Are you hard right now, uncle Joel?”

The older brother narrows his eyes at you.

“What d’ you think, angel? I jus’ watched you fuck your own ass like a cock hungry slut.”

You smile proudly, imagining his huge bulge, straining his jeans all because of you.

“Have a nice jerk off session, uncle,” you mock but Joel smirks.

“Don’t think so, baby. Gonna go find a nice wet pussy to fuck in the bathroom.”

With that he ends the call and jealousy burns deep in your belly.

As always attentive to your mood, Tommy swiftly scoops you into his arms and holds you close, while you’re nuzzling his neck.

For a few minutes you two are lying in silence. Tommy’s heartbeat soothes you, floods your soul with affection for the man but you sigh, feeling a pang in your heart that Joel isn’t here.

“He really wanted to come, sweetheart,” Tommy says, as if having read your mind.

You hum, faking indifference, but your heart feels lighter and you tilt your head up to kiss his soft lips and mumble, “I love you, daddy.”

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated! 💖

Part 6 | SERIES MASTERLIST I MASTERLIST

Tag list for the series: @milla-frenchy @iamasaddie @koshkaj-blog @survivingandenduring @nana90azevedo @mermaidgirl30 @oldenoughtoknowbettersstuff @obscurexsorrows @tammythr @ratoonstown @anama-cara @pedge-page @huskyfox5 @ashleyfilm @neverwheremoonchild @stevie75 @untamedheart81 @puduvallee @theoraekenslover @eloquentdreamer @ashhlsstuff @evolnoomym @pinkiec6-rubi @guelyury

Tommy tag @huskyfox5

General tag list:@milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover @schnarfer @mermaidgirl30 @staywildflowahchild @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @evolnoomym @keylimebeag @joelmillerisapunk

If you'd like to be tagged in the series or in anything else let me know!💕

#pedro pascal #joel miller #tommy miller #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #pedro pascal characters #tommy miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel x reader #tommy miller x you #tommy miller tlou #the last of us #joel the last of us #tommy the last of us #bad blood series #dark joel miller #joel miller tlou #tlou

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4vlad · 3 months

Text

My master

—summary: Alucard, the Vampire who proclaimed himself your servant, drinks your blood for the first time

—warnings: sexual content, master/servant relationship, non-consensual touching, dirty talk, blood drinking, human/vampire relationship

words: 1.468.

The day could not have been more exhausting, you had to work late because your boss didn't have more staff, it left you exhausted, very tired but you were finally able to get out of that hell, the bad thing is that it is very dark and cold at night, the London streets are eerily silent tonight.

"Scared dear?" He says a loud voice to which you scream and turn around throwing your bag towards the person behind you, the man catches the bag quickly "is this for me?" He laughs. "Ah! Alucard! You scared me, don't do that again!" You approach him and take his bag from him, "my sincere apologies, my master" you shudder at the dominant alias, Alucard is a vampire who had proclaimed himself as your servant months ago, you think he is crazy and you have certainly realized that he is, you were not a dominant person, much less someone of authority, you honestly don't know why he says you are his Mistress and you haven't asked him anyway. From the little you know about him is that he is a very strong, self-centered and prankster Vampire, you have even seen him in action a couple of times.

Alucard laughs at your ramblings while you both head to your apartment, even though the walk was long neither of them spoke much, as always Alucard only followed you because according to him it is to "protect you from danger" that you appreciated but you also don't want to abuse his goodness.

You enter your apartment and Alucard follows you by closing the door behind him "I must say that your area is very cozy Mistress" he takes off his hat and glasses before sitting on the sofa that he himself has claimed as "his", you Without giving it much importance go to your room and changes your clothes into more comfortable ones, minutes later You returns with the vampire "...I'm going to cook chicken and French fries, do you want?" You ask the vampire "No, dear human, I'm not a big fan of fried food." You thought for a moment whether to offer him a salad since he was a vampire, but he didn't seem to hate human food either, after all, he's eaten with you a few times, well, when you cook for him. .

You got down to work while the vampire just watched you as always, at first you were afraid of this monster, his energy was and is a little sinister, but over time you began to appreciate his company, he saved you a few times from some malefactors even, their presence still bothers you a little but you put up with it, Alucard has made it clear to you many times that he has no intention of harming you, that he is your servant and is here to obey your orders, whatever you ask of him. He's weird, you think.

In your rambling you get distracted and accidentally cut the skin on your hand, a sharp pain runs through you, thick blood falls from your hand to your elbow, you quickly turn off the stove "Ugh!" You groan in pain as you head towards the dishwasher to wash your wound.

The vampire, with his developed sense of smell, perceived a sweet and tempting aroma in the air, a fragrance that was familiar and irresistible at the same time. It was your smell of blood, a signal to his thirsty nature. However, there was something different about this smell, a subtle but unmistakable touch of sweetness, as if he belonged to a human being with a unique and exquisite blood. Alucard quickly stopped you, he appeared in front of you with a smile from ear to ear "Let me help you with that My Dear Mistress, it will be a pleasure to clean and heal your wound" you got a little scared, you were dripping blood with an extremely violent vampire, danger!

Alucard sensed your fear and quickly calmed you down or at least he tried to. "I won't bite you, I promise, you don't have to be scared, sweet human, I won't hurt you unless you give me those orders," he says with a deep but soft voice at the same time. While the vampire convinces you, he takes you to the couch and sits you on top of his legs. You are embarrassed but you still give in. You raise your hand to let the blood drip into your Vampire's mouth. Alucard opens his mouth, big as a beast, his fangs sharp, each one pointed, he sticks out his long, fat tongue, he is eager, salivating even before you will agree to feed him.

A heavy drop of blood falls on the vampire's tongue, his pupils dilate and his gaze becomes intense, the beautiful beast grabs your hand and brings it to his mouth, his tongue was cold, the sensation of the wet and heavy tongue of Alucard slightly relieves your pain, he tastes your entire hand and your fingers, from top to bottom from one side to the other, his tongue moves gently enjoying the taste of your blood, he simply knows that he has never tasted a taste as sweet as it. Yours, it's the first time he's tasted your blood, he knew you were as tasty as he imagined.

Shadow hands appear around you to caress you, his hands are everywhere! On your abdomen, legs and thighs! How disrespectful!

You get embarrassed and try to take his hand away but he is stronger, his grip is firm on his food.

Alucard's hands caress you gently, kneading your skin over your clothes, he wants to taste everything about you.

once he finishes his meal, his eyes are fixed on you, his irises a bright red color, he smiles at you softly but with a dominant expression, he lets out a deep laugh as he brings you even closer to him "my mistress... You are a virgin..." He says with a deep voice, you move your hands away and put it to your chest, your cheeks turn red because of Alucard's words, did he know it just by tasting your blood? What does it have to do with you being a virgin? What a dirty pervert!

"So what...?"

He just laughs, he knew you were shy but you were also sweet and kind, always gentle and ready for anything, he couldn't believe that a little thing as pretty as you was still a virgin, he couldn't believe that even though you was so beautiful, so tasty, no one has corrupted you, well...it's not like any human can properly teach you what carnal pleasures are.

He purred, the taste and your aroma were overwhelming, his Master is as tasty as she looks.

"Mmm...wouldn't you like to feel what sexual pleasure is like, little human?" He doesn't care if you were a virgin or not but now? Oh...he wanted to corrupt you in every way possible, the smell of your embarrassment and excitement from the dirty talk invaded the vampire's senses.

You felt your panties stick to your lips because of the humidity "..." You remained silent, is this how this creature addresses his master? Did you know that he was insolent, what good is he proclaiming himself your servant if he doesn't respect you as such? Your eyebrows knit together in an expression of anger and embarrassment. He laughs at your reaction.

"My master..." he says with a suggestive voice, almost like a whisper, "it's been a long time since I gave myself to a Human," you don't respond. "You know that I am all yours, your servant, I am here to please your needs, to please you my beloved master..." Again he begins to purr. Your heart beats hard as you feel the hardness in the Vampire's crotch.

He was a burlesque and a pervert but he knew how to seduce a woman, using dirty words but at the same time being a gentleman.

He has never given himself this way to a master, not even his previous masters, but you? How could you be so delicious? So cute? He was willing to please you if you wanted, he just waited for you to say the words.

"You...you are not my servant Alucard" you get up from the couch "And I don't want...I don't want to do that..."

Alucard sighs disappointed but accepts "even if you don't want to be my mistress, I want you to know that I am here if you need to satisfy your needs, dear," he smiles.

"Please forgive my insolence, no matter how much I want you, I have to earn your affection and I will do it appropriately" he rises to his height and bends down again to kiss your hand in an act of chivalry.

Sorry if there are spelling mistakes, English is not my first language, I hope you enjoyed! You are free to leave me ideas by the way. AO3: rosemary06 (click)

#alucard #alucard hellsing #alucard x reader #alucard x you #alucard hellsing x reader #hellsing #hellsing ultimate #hellsing anime #fanfic #hellsing x reader

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chocsra · 7 months

Text

✧ more personal chuuya hcs !!

✧ appearence hcs:

has a small small face

long, naturally curled, luscious eyelashes

soft and silky ass hair

very smooth, soft looking ivory skin

repping mestiso community, described as beautiful and unique

he actually glows in like any good lighting, golden hour does him best

his beauty is like majestic but gets called pretty a lot

bones did him soo wrong, he has toned sleeper build guys trust

naturally low-lided, sleepy eyes

he has really pretty brown eyes

has russet hair, NOT a ginger, he's more of a reddish brunette

slim, large hands that are really attractive

SNATCHED waist

he has a few pretty freckles

old money aesthetic

90s hot.

my personal hc is that his appearence comes from some sort of european descent, be it french or spanish blood that made his features so unique

looks so unreal that he looks otherworldly or like a doll; alien beauty

his skin reminds you of porcelain; this man's skin is mad flawless

ties his hair up at home into either a manbun or ponytail

has an 8+ step skincare routine..

has a super raspy voice in the morning/night

always takes his gloves off in the cuntiest manner - either biting the fingertips off one by one or that one manga panel where he bites the wrist part

whines when he stretches and it always catches u off guard

✧ crack/general hcs:

dances like hyunjin from skz (knows how to and practices his moonwalk)

bro is a WHEEZER when he genuinely laughs, he also feels the need to say ur not funny to keep ur ego in check when he is in fact laughing his ass off

when yall are laughing ur ass off (drunk or not) just know yall will be collasping on the floor feeling the six pack coming in

rip chuuya - you would've loved making electric guitar thirst traps on tiktok

he LOVES rollarcoasters or anything with a kick to it tbh (fast car or motorcycle rides) bc he loves gravity dzuh, but yknow what he CANT take??

them seats in the movie theatre where they move according to the movie, he gets way too invested in movies and the seats moving like crazy fries his brain (IM SORRY IF U DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKING AB, THEYRE CALLED DBOX)

he ofc has a weakness for dogs but if he ever tries to feed a stray cat and it runs away or hisses he gets a little sassy and hisses back

sleeps like a dying victorian child. you walked onto him sleeping once and contemplated on calling a priest

one of those people who have copies of the same clothing item, or they're like barely any different. you see his hat rack and he gets offended bc "all his hats are completely different"

he scoffs a lot

starts chasing you if you ever MENTION the times when he was 15 (has made cringy youtube diss tracks with dazai, lost the login, now that videos up forever..)

if you're short like him and tell a story complaining about how ppl call u short, he gets personally offended FOR you

likes reading books but they vary from sophisticated novels to books like "HOW TO STAND ON BUSINESS?!?!"

his spice tolerance is wild, even if he can't actually take it he still will to prove a point

since his voice is pretty guttural whenever he has a voice crack while speaking you both pause and look at each other in silence before you laugh and he just goes "shut up.. shut up.. 😒"

he likes to mock ppl (lovingly) w higher voices like higuchi (especially when shes talking ab aku) bc it's older brother vibes and their reactions are always priceless

✧ chocsra™

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chibieggplant · 6 months

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Confessions with Penguin

My boy Penguin doesn’t get enough love. No warnings just banter and fluff.

You sat eating your lunch watching your other crew mates converse and joke with each other when suddenly you were jolted out of your little world feeling a nudge on your shoulder.

“Hey! I told you to stop doing that” You grumble as you rub your arm.

"What, this?" Penguin nudges your shoulder again as he takes the seat next to you.

You swipe his hat from his head in retaliation as he sits down.

"Hey, give that back!" he protests with a smile as he tries to grab his hat back.

“Nuh uh!” you pull the hat down snug on your head sticking your tongue out him.

Penguin lets out an exasperated sigh. "Fine, but can I at least get my hat back after lunch?" He didn’t take his hat off…ever, but he couldn’t deny you did look pretty cute in it so he would make an exception.

“You’ll get it back when you promise to stop nudging me”

"Fine, fine. I swear I won't nudge you again" He said, crossing his fingers behind his back.

“Do you think I’m an idiot? That wasn’t a proper promise” you smirk adjusting his hat on your head proudly.

"What do you want from me? Blood?" he says in a pouty voice, crossing his arms.

“Yeah! I want you to make a solom vow”

"You're impossible" he rolled his eyes as he nudged you again.

“And you’re annoying” you say with a smile not really meaning it.

"Shut up" he said playfully, punching you in the arm lightly this time.

“Point proven” you laugh punching his arm back.

"Oh, you wanna go?" he asked playfully, pretending to throw a punch your way.

“You’re the one who punched me first!”

"But it was just a light punch, not like yours, you nearly took my arm off!” he says dramatically, feigning an exaggerated expression of pain.

“I’m sure you’ll survive” you chuckled rolling your eyes.

"No, no I’m pretty sure i’m dying." he says dramatically again, grabbing his arm in ‘pain’.

“Well can you die quietly then please?” You smile as you go back to eating your lunch.

"Well, thanks for your concern. My final seconds on Earth and you can't even show a little sympathy for your favourite crew member" he said with a fake sad expression.

“I’ll make sure to put on your tombstone that you went out from a light punch to the arm” you deadpanned.

"Make sure it's carved in marble too” he said sarcastically with a dramatic flourish.

“You’ll get a wooden cross at best” you chuckled.

"It better be mahogany at the very least”

“I’m sure I can find some nice looking sticks outside”

"They have to be the perfect length, not too short but not too long either. Oh, and make sure the shape is nice and straight, no twisted branches"

“I’ll do my best…just for you” you smile as you throw a french fry in your mouth trying not to laugh.

"Thank you for doing the bare minimum" he said, faking a dramatic sigh before shoving a handful of fries into his mouth.

“What happened to ‘my final seconds on earth’? Shouldn’t you be dead by now?” you smirked. “I’m pretty sure dead guys don’t steal other people’s food”

He tried hard not to laugh, his lips twitching. “I'm fighting for my life here”

“Shut up” You smile throwing a french fry at him.

He catches the fry in his hand and pops it into his mouth. “So rude, even in my dying moments”

“You’re insufferable” you smile shaking your head.

"But you still like me, right?" he said leaning on the table.

“Someone has to” you shrug.

"Oh, please, you secretly have a huge crush on me” he teased, batting his eyelashes.

“You wish” you grin throwing another french fry at him.

He quickly catches the fry again in his hand and eats it. "Don't even try to deny it. We've been friends forever, there's no way you're not in love with me"

“By that logic that means you’re in love with me too” You smirk before quickly realising what you just said…did you just admit to being in love with him?

It takes him a second but then his eyes widened in realisation. Was that an actual slip-up? Did his crew mate, his crush, actually just admit she felt the same way?

“W-wait…what did you just say?”

You looked away suddenly, your eyes fixating on an empty spot across the room. You could feel yourself starting to flush. Had you really just admitted your feelings to him?

You try to backtrack quickly “N-no y-you- I mean…like as a friend…” but you just end up fumbling your words.

He noticed how your words faltered and caught onto the way your cheeks blushed red. Were you just messing around with him?

“No, no, hold on a second. Back up. What did you just say?”

You looked away, embarrassed. “I-it was j-just a joke. I wasn't being serious, really”

His eyes were on your every move. He saw your blush grow deeper, your eyes darting across the room. In that moment, he knew your words had been genuine, not just a funny joke.

“You're lying”

You stayed silent for a few moments, hesitating to respond. Your heart raced as you realised he had read you like a book.

"It was just... I... I just meant by your logic that would mean you’re in love with me…too” You said the last word so quiet that you’d be surprised if he heard it.

A hint of a smile appeared on his face. He couldn't believe it. Did he actually hear what he thought he had? He knew he wasn't imagining things when you started stumbling over you words. He knew you felt the same way as he did. Now he just needed to confirm the answer.

“Say it again”

“S-say what?” The blush across your cheeks refused to leave your face as you still couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact with him.

He leaned slightly closer to you, lowering his voice so that it could only reach her ears.

“Say that you're in love with me…”

You looked at him through the corner of her eye, completely shaken up by this whole situation.

“D-do you really want me to say it?”

He took your face in his hands so that your eyes met. You shivered at the touch of his hands, a wave of butterflies washing over you as you felt his eyes gazing into yours. Your heart was racing, pounding rapidly in your chest but what you didn’t know was his heart was also beating just as fast.

“Just say it…please”

Your words were breathless, barely even a whisper. “I-I’m... in love with you”

A smile spread across his face as he brushed his thumb over your cheek. He could barely believe this moment was actually happening, that the person he had loved for so long also shared those feelings with him. He wanted to kiss you, to hold you forever. But he knew he needed to hold back, he didn't want to rush anything…not yet anyway.

“Well look at that, here I was thinking I was the only one...”

#one piece penguin #penguin x reader #one piece #one piece x reader #penguin #heart pirates #penguin one piece #anime

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daemour · 5 months

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Pairing: yandere! San x f!Reader

Genre: Some fluff, angst, yandere au, established relationship au

Warnings: Murder, blood, violence, creepy waiter stares at ur boobs

WC: 1182

Summary: You and San are trying to have a nice dinner when a waiter gets a little too close for comfort...and San is having none of that.

This is a collab between me and @sanjoongie <3 she wrote san's pov and let me tell you, it is BONE chilling! ^^ please make sure to read and enjoy her side of the story too <3

“What do you want to order?” your boyfriend asks, thumbing through the menu.”I don’t care what or how much—it’s on me. You just have to make room for dessert.” You laugh at San’s eagerness, only to look up and see him staring at you like you hung the stars in the sky.

“Thank you, baby,” you hum, leaning over the table to kiss his lips softly. “This place looks so nice. I’m glad it’s right by us, we can just go again if we don’t get everything we like.”

San smiles, turning his head to kiss your lips properly before pulling back, a starry look still in his eyes. “Of course, love. Whatever to make you happy.”

Your cheeks burn at his sweet words and you busy yourself with the menu again.

“Are you two ready to order?” A waiter approaches your table, a smile directed at you and you flash a quick one back before looking back down.

“Uh, San, do you have an idea?”

Your boyfriend hums. “I’d like to get the steak, but I’d like to replace the salad with the potatoes. And if we can get the truffle fries as an appetiser that’d be great. Babe?”

“Uh, sure. Could I get the French onion soup? And if I could have some decaf coffee with that?” You glance up at the waiter and are utterly embarrassed to realise he’s not looking at you but down your collar at your tits. You scoot over, smile fading. “Black is fine,” you mumble out, your hand gripping the menu just a little tighter. The waiter nods, and with one last quirk of the lips, he’s taking your orders to the back of the house.

San frowns at your act, leaning forward. “Are you okay, my love?”

You shrug, pulling the collar of your dress up a little. How you wish you wore something else. “Waiter was staring at my boobs but whatever. I’m just excited for the food.” You send a small smile to your boyfriend, who returns it but with some annoyance brewing behind his eyes. But thankfully, he lets it slide.

“He should keep his eyes on his little notebook,” is the only snarky response San mutters under his breath, and the rest of the dinner goes smoothly. The two of you joke and laugh, and San moves to sit on the outside of your side of the table so when the waiter comes back he has no choice but to look at San in the eyes instead. It makes you giggle the tiniest bit and San leans into your shoulder as his shoulders shake in silent amusement at how happy you are.

“Hey babe, I’m going to head to the bathroom. Can you grab the check? And you can warm up the car if you want.” San pecks you on the cheek before standing and pulling on his suit jacket, his gloves half hanging out of the pocket.

“Stay safe and don’t fall in,” you joke and San chuckles at the bad joke you always say, shaking his head and not gracing you with a response as he hands you his wallet to pay and heads towards the back.

You finish your coffee, gather your items, and pay, but then you belatedly realise you didn’t even get to have dessert. A pout forms on your face. Dessert is easily the best part of dates with San, and now you don’t even get to have that.

“San?” You call through the men’s bathroom door. “Are you in there?”

You pause, but no response. With a sigh, you tap your foot and turn, looking around the restaurant to see if you can catch sight of his familiar blonde hair, but to no avail. But what does catch your attention is the slightly ajar door leading outside to your right and curiosity gets the better of you.

“San-ah, could we get ice-cream?” You call as you carefully step your way through the door, hiking up your skirt to not let it catch on the rugged wood.

You look to your right and see the street. You look to your left, and a scream lodges itself in your throat. There is your sweet, beautiful, loving boyfriend with blood on his hands and face as he holds a waiter…the waiter against the brick wall and a crazed grin pulling at his lips. The horror that you want to express does not come out the way you want. Instead of a shriek ripping its way out, all that you can conjure is a soft “San?” and a choked sob.

Your boyfriend’s head snaps toward you, the almost demonic smile softening as he sees you. You step towards him before stopping at the corner of the dumpster they’re behind, not willing to step even closer to the limp body.

“San, that man–” you try to say, reaching out and grabbing onto his sleeve, but San pulls his arm out of your grip as gently as he always handles you.

“My purpose is to protect you, my love. Let me do my job.”

Your eyes widen as he drops the waiter to the ground behind a dumpster, bending down to callously wipe his gloves off on the waiter’s jacket before moving closer to you.

“He won’t bother you anymore, my love. Now let’s go get ice cream,” he hums carelessly, pressing his lips to yours. You can’t tell if you want to gag at the metallic taste entering your mouth or not, but all you do is swallow your beating heart back down and nod with a shaky smile.

He wipes his face with his gloved hands before leading you to the car and driving you to your favourite ice cream parlour. He orders two vanilla cones, passing one to you as you find a booth in the corner.

You can’t quite focus on your ice cream, though. It’s quickly drooping as you lick it slowly, your eyes fixed on San. If it wasn’t for your direct witness, you’d almost not know what horror he just committed. He takes large bites of his scoop like he always does, a cheerful look on his face and no trace of malice anywhere.

“Aren’t you going to eat yours, babe?” San’s saccharine voice pulls you out of your spiralling thoughts and you quickly lap at the melting vanilla dessert. “Are you feeling okay, honey?”

You nod quickly, unsure of what to say if you should say anything. “Yeah, yeah, baby. I’m just tired.” It’s an unconvincing lie and you let your lips pull into a smile to do your best to convince him further.

San smiles back, softly, but you can’t help but still see the twisted one flash in your memory. And the worst thing is that you can’t tell whether you hate it or not. “I love you forever,” San hums, leaning over to steal a bit of your ice cream and kiss your temple.

“I love you forever,” you repeat, and you feel deep in your heart that it’s not a lie, not now, not ever.

#ateez #ateez fanfiction #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez angst #ateez fluff #ateez san #san x reader #san fanfiction #san fanfic #san fluff #san angst

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emwheezie · 11 months

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Some vibes I'm trying to capture in my comic

▪️Dead autumn leaves floating in the puddles of drained pools.

▪️Lying on your kitchen floor waiting for someone to notice you.

▪️Hanging out with your best friend in the Burger King parking lot way past your bedtime.

▪️Looking into an almost empty claw machine with a ratty teddy bear and bugs crawling in there

▪️Eating Popeyes french fries on your way home on the redline specifically between MGH/Kendall stops.

▪️The way fake blood stains on your skin.

▪️Sleeping until 4pm on a mattress on the floor in early October.

▪️Dropping your Starbucks peppermint latte on the corner of MassAve and Shepard, watching the coffee melt into the slush soaked sidewalk.

▪️Accidentally inhaling hairspray and the sticky feeling it leaves on your forehead.

▪️Going out, dressed a bit out of your comfort zone and feeling like you're wearing a costume.

▪️3rd wheeling your own plan to hang out with friends.

#vibes #moodboard #massachusetts #boston #cambridge

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impala-dreamer · 7 months

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Cherry Wine

A Tale from the 'My Bloody Valentine' Universe

~Tom left town in a hurry, escaping capture by faking his death. On the run and distraught, he finds comfort in the arms of a stranger.~

Tom Hanniger x Rose (OFC)

2,453 Words

Warnings: NSFW. Sexual Scenes. Torture. Bondage. Psychosis. Movie Level Blood and Gore.

A/N: Written for @jacklesversebingo "Be good for me and I'll untie you."

This takes place immediately after the film and shows Tom still dealing with his issues, namely murder. If you're unfamiliar with the movie, I doubt it will matter. Just know that he is insane and dangerous. Hope you enjoy!

Impala-Dreamer’s Masterlist ~ Patreon ~ Published Works

He didn't know where he was going, but he knew he couldn't go home.

He didn't even know where home was anymore. Was it back in Harmony surrounded by memories and the corpses of his childhood? Or back in the hospital with all of his twisted pain and overly medicated thoughts?

He didn't know.

So he drove.

He drove until the sun rose and hung high in the sky, blossoming over the Pennsylvania landscape like the face of God. Bright and warm, it beat down on the maroon truck as trees blurred in his peripheral.

When the gas tank was as empty as his stomach, he pulled off of the interstate and parked, taking only his wallet and jacket with him.

The late afternoon was warm. February had been uncharacteristically mild, and he tugged at the collar of his sweatshirt, readjusting the hood behind his head.

Bill’s Diner was open and crowded. Tables lined the big front window, each red vinyl booth filled with locals who chatted over never-ending cups of coffee and plates of over-done french fries.

A little bell rang overhead as he walked in, and a pretty brunette with long hair pulled back into a tight bun smiled.

“Sit anywhere, hun,” she called to him while navigating the sea of tables with her hands full.

Tom nodded and looked around for an empty spot before deciding on a stool at the counter. He sat and slumped forward, clasped his hands on the sticky linoleum. He stared at his hands, willing the trembling to cease, but it never really went away. He was always just a little bit anxious, some part of him always shaking even if no one else saw.

Trauma had slashed at his soul and the scars ran deep.

A deep breath steadied him and Tom looked up as the waitress came into view.

“Hey there. Welcome to Bill’s. Can I getcha something to drink?”

Her smile was captivating. Her two front teeth were adorably bigger than the rest and her plump bow lips were tinted gently with a red gloss that made them look forever wet.

He couldn’t help but stare.

She blinked and looked away, pale skin blushing a soft pink under his gaze. Bright blue eyes gleamed when she turned back and Tom’s chest ached.

She reminded him of Sarah but a little plainer, a little softer all over.

“Hello?”

She waved a hand in front of his face and Tom startled, sitting up straight and shaking his head to clear his vision.

“Sorry,” he said with a sigh. “Long drive.”

The waitress nodded and grabbed a mug from below the counter. “I bet.” She filled it with coffee and slid it to Tom who smiled and closed his hands around the cup. “You coming or going?”

He bit his lip, wondering how to answer. Where was he coming from? Where was he going? To hell, probably.

Tired green eyes swept over her. The plastic buttons on her white shirt were tiny and struggling to keep the thin fabric from pulling open across her breasts. Her dark jeans were tight and dusted with flour and a few drops of marinara that had slipped past her black apron. Her curves were decadent and she smelled like vanilla.

He cleared his throat. “Just passing through.”

She smiled kindly and laid a plastic covered menu next to his coffee.

“Well, alright then, stranger. My name’s Rose. When you’re ready, just holler.” She winked and turned away, leaving him to scan the day’s specials alone.

The giant clock in the corner ticked the hours away. Customers came and went. Coins were dropped; tips were thin. Empty plates smeared with ketchup stacked up in the kitchen; spilled salt was wiped from table tops with a dingy rag.

Rose was busy most of the evening, but never too busy to stop back at the counter and talk with Tom. She lingered near him, pretending to clean while they chatted about how it hadn’t snowed in a few weeks and how the price of gas was going down a bit. She was sweet and Tom liked being near her. She was beautiful and her voice was like a calm breeze that lulled and comforted him.

When the windows were dark and the fuchsia neon glowed bright, Rose set her hands on the counter and looked down at him.

“Closing time, buddy. You don’t have to go home, butcha can’t stay here.”

He looked up through thick lashes and smiled flirtatiously. “Already?”

Rose licked her lips. “Sadly, yes. All good things must come to an end. Or so I’m told.”

“That’s a shame.” Without looking away, he drained the sweet swill from the bottom of his mug. “There any place to get a drink around here?” He paused, calculating her interest, and then went for it. He had nothing to lose. “Or maybe I could walk you home…”

Rose’s cheeks burned and her smile was impossible to hide. “Maybe both.”

Tom rolled onto his back and stretched, rolling his head on his shoulders and taking a deep breath. He hadn’t slept so well in a long time; hadn’t felt so good in forever.

Rose had been just what he needed.

They sat on her cinnamon couch and drank sparkling pink wine. Tom hated it, but the bubbles felt nice and each sip seemed to loosen her up a bit more.

When the bottle was empty and the glasses drained, Rose scooted closer and set her hand on Tom’s knee. He bit his lip as her fingers climbed higher, held his breath as she palmed his dick through his jeans, let his eyes close as she climbed into his lap.

She was heavy and warm. He ran his hands down her sides, slid his fingers around the curve of her waist. She pressed her ass down over him and rolled her hips.

He hissed at the friction and pushed a hand through her long hair, dragging her down for a kiss.

Her lips were plump and delicious. The gloss on her mouth tasted so familiar to him but he couldn’t place it.

“I never do this,” she whispered, half laughing as she ran her hands down his chest.

Tom grinned and traced the soft flesh above her jeans. “I don’t know, you’re pretty good at it.”

She chewed her lip and blushed. “I mean, take customers home. I haven’t done this in forever.”

He stared deep into her eyes and popped the bottom button of her shirt. “Well, I’m glad you decided to.” He scraped his nails down her sides and Rose’s head tipped back, her eyes fluttered shut, she hummed lustfully.

“Me too…”

He smiled and tossed the sheet off of himself; sat up and scrubbed a hand down his face. He’d have to shave soon, but it wasn’t a priority. He scratched at his scalp and yawned.

“Mornin’.”

Tom sucked a strawberry nipple between his lips and melted at the sound she made. Rose arched her back, pushing her tits against his face and grinding down on his cock.

They were mostly naked, shirts and jeans tugged away and tossed into random corners of the small living room. Only thin fabric separated them now, and Tom rubbed his middle finger against her covered slit. Her raspberry panties were soaked.

“Fuck, you’re so wet.”

Rose nibbled on his ear. “Wanna see the bedroom?”

He jerked his hips, bounced her in his lap. “Absolutely…”

The bedroom was flooded with mid-day sun that filtered through the thin curtains, and he stood up in a sun puddle, feeling the warmth instantly. He sighed and walked to the adjoining bathroom.

The tile floor was freezing and he tiptoed in, pulled back the shower curtain and turned on the tap.

“You don’t mind if I take a quick shower, do you?”

She was total perfection.

Stretched out over the bed, her pale skin looked like fresh cream against the burgundy sheets. She moaned as he tied the silken sash tight around her left wrist, squirmed as he leaned over her to secure the right.

“Another thing I never do,” she teased, reaching with her mouth to catch a kiss.

“What’s that? Let a stranger tie you up?” His smile was devilish yet sweet and he gave in to a deep kiss.

“Not exactly a safe thing to do…”

He licked into her mouth; savored the taste of her. “No,” he laughed, pulling back to look down at her. “It’s really not.”

Blue eyes fluttered as Tom drew his hands down her nakedness. He cupped each breast, pinched her nipples, scraped his teeth against the stiff buds.

“Fuck, you’re driving me nuts,” she whimpered, tugging at the restraints, needing to touch him.

He settled between her thighs, his broad shoulders pushing them open wide. “That’s kinda the point.”

His tongue burned like fire against her clit. He nuzzled into her, lapped at her slick heat, teased her to the edge of ecstacy.

Rose bucked her hips into his handsome face, held her breath as he slipped two thick fingers inside. Her body tensed. Her mind blanked. Her pulse quickened.

“Fuck. Please…”

Again, she tugged at the sashes holding her tight and Tom lifted his eyes. He grinned at her struggle.

“Be good for me,” he breathed, “and I’ll untie you.”

Heavy, warm steam filled the room as Tom lingered by the sink. He toyed with her toothbrush, sifted through her medicine cabinet. There wasn’t much inside and everything was expected. Floss, antibiotic ointment, a few hairpins. Half a bottle of aspirin, tweezers, lotion.

He smiled. Her skin was so soft.

He slipped in like a knife through warm butter, filling her up with his thick cock.

Tom thrust against her; dug his fingertips into the soft flesh above her hip bones. “Fuck, you’re amazing,” he moaned, his eyes closed, head thrown back as her body tightened around him.

Rose held her breath, wriggling harder beneath him with each jerk of his hips.

“Please!”

He looked down at her wet, ruby lips and smiled. Leaning down, he folded her nearly in half and scratched hard down her sides. She squirmed and garnet lines erupted in his wake.

“So gorgeous…”

His pace quickened. She moaned loudly over the sound of his thighs slapping against her ass.

“Please!”

Each scream egged him on. Every twist of her body beneath him made his heart race.

Rose was panting, choking on her pleasure as he fucked deep into her.

“Tom-”

He closed a hand around her delicate throat, massaged the sacred arteries on either side.

She thrashed against the bindings; eyes wide and lips growing pale.

He squeezed harder and he felt her cunt pulse as she came. Blue eyes were fading in a sea of wine, blood vessels bursting as his grip tightened.

“That’s it,” he grit, riding her through the pleasure. “Just like that. Fuck!”

Tom closed the cabinet door. He swept away the fog with his palm and looked into his own eyes. He was happy, sated and beaming.

His lips were ruddy and swollen a deep red. He pressed his fingertips to them and sighed. He could still feel her kiss, taste her on his tongue.

She tasted like cherry wine.

He kissed her gently yet deeply, memorizing the feel of her plush lips against his and the way she melted into him. His cum ran down her leg, warm and messy.

He pulled away and rolled onto his side, yanked the thin sheet up around his shoulders.

She slept soundly; he mumbled in his sleep.

Tom stepped into the hot water and moaned happily. The pressure was sublime. Water pounded his aching muscles, burned his skin blissfully.

He ran his hands through his hair and turned around to face the spray. It washed down his cheeks, flowed into his mouth. He looked down at the drain and gasped as a whirlpool of crimson swirled around the chrome and disappeared.

“The fuck?”

His mind raced.

His hands were stained with dried blood; his forearms scored with claw marks.

He panicked, panting as the water washed the night away and his memory returned.

He ripped through her skin like a knife through warm butter.

Tom jabbed the blade into her; dug the tip into the soft flesh above her hip bones.

“Fuck, you’re perfect,” he growled, green eyes wide as he watched the blood flow from her sides.

Rose gasped for a breath and wrenched her arms free of the silk sashes. She slapped at his chest, shoved his face away.

“Please!”

He looked down at her gaping ruby lips and smiled. With a murderous gleam in his eyes, he scratched hard down her side with the knife and watched the garnet stream erupt in his wake.

“So gorgeous…”

She kicked at him, summoning all of her strength to push him off even as her energy seeped away and soaked into the sheets. “Please!”

Each scream egged him on. Every twist of her body beneath him made his heart race and his cock twitch.

Barely able to breathe, Tom burst from the shower and steadied himself on the sink, knuckles blanching as he held on tight. He forced himself to look at his reflection and nearly broke as he saw the lingering blood on his cheeks. The splatter had been fast and furious- an arterial spray that painted his face from temple to chin.

“Fuck…”

He closed his left hand around her delicate throat, harshly pinching the sacred arteries on either side.

Rose clawed at his arms, drawing blood as she fought for her life.

He squeezed harder and felt her pulse slow. Blue eyes were fading in a sea of wine, blood vessels bursting as his grip tightened.

“That’s it,” he grit, lifting the knife to her jaw. “Just like that.” He sliced through her vocal chords, silencing her cries forever. A sanguine tide covered her milky breasts, stained his steady hands.

Through a cloud of steam, Tom stumbled back into the bedroom and bit back a scream.

Rose was laid out on the right side of the bed, her naked body posed as if sleeping. Her throat was torn, her sides split, chest carved open exposing the pale bones caging her heart.

He swallowed down a wave of bile and fell to his knees.

“Not again…”

Above the bed, drawn in Rose’s blood, was a simple heart.

Tom laughed as the last bit of life drained from her beautiful face. He bent to kiss her cold lips, savoring the last taste of her, memorizing the soft push of her lips.

He licked the blood from his fingertips as he rolled over, tired and sated.

She tasted like cherry wine.

2024 Forever Tags (Always Open! Send an Ask!)

@akshi8278 @babysimpala @beardburnsupersoldiers @chenshemesh1 @cosicas-cuquis @deans-baby-momma @deanwinchesterswitch @feelmyroarrrr @foxyjwls007 @hobby27 @impalaspixie @jackles010378 @kazsrm67 @k-slla @leigh70 @lyarr24 @nancymcl @peachy-vans @pizzagirlxnsfwx @rachiem4-blog @sexyvixen7 @the-wounded-healer05

#my bloody valentine #jacklesversebingo23 #fanfic #jensen ackles #tom hanniger

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soulreapin · 7 months

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FIC! REC! FRIDAY!

hey folks you already know the name of this game: its friday and i recommend some fanfictions to you that ive read this week or some other week and you go show their authors some love!

1. i love you in the morning when the blood runs to your cheeks by lelex (15k, general audiences, klance)

FARMERS MARKET AU. keith runs a small knife sharpeners business and is roped into running a market stall by shiro, who already works there. lance works at his mother’s bakery, which also has a stall.

ive read this one like three times because its so damn cute and i love how they wrote keith. if this author has a tumblr please send them my way 😁

2. if i say jump, you just say “how high?” (i think you might love me to death) by negativefouriq/autisticlancemcclain (9k, teen&up, klance)

canonverse fic where somehow somewhere keith has it in his head him and lance are lovers. lance cannot find it in himself to say otherwise. this one shoots me in the foot everytime i read it because keith is SO attentive and knows lance down to the letter. get me a man like that.

3. never judge a book by nostalgicish (3k, teen&up, klance)

modern au where lance and hunk are library assistants at their local college. they like to kin assign people books and genres to pass the time, but when a strange, gruff looking dude walks in to pick up pride and prejudice…shit happens.

GUYS this one is so cute i beta-read it and stal is a very good friend of mine So. everyone should partake in classical romance reader keith.

4. speak for the stars by speaks (ao3 account required! 49k, teen&up, klance)

canonverse fix-it with black paladin lance! guys this is one of my absolute favorites. this is the klance bible to me. this is how voltron ended, this is canon, and no one can tell me otherwise. make an ao3 account if you dont have one and read it.

5. would you like fries with that? by deerstalkerdeathfrisbee

modern au where keith is a minimum wage employee at a burger king and lance comes in recreationally to cry and get french fries.

this one is SO cute and so silly. i too would break down in a burger king drive through if the worker asked for my order.

happy friday, yall, enjoy your reading material and tell your author friends you love them xoxo soulreapin

#vld #voltron #keith kogane #vld keith #keith voltron #fic rec #fic rec friday #voltron fic rec #lance mcclain #klance #vld lance

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bluelocksource · 1 year

Text

Itoshi Sae’s trivia (source: twt & Egoist Bible).

"I'll see with my own eyes what kind of FW (idiot) will be born in Japan."

☆ Character's colour: Adzuki bean color (reddish-brown).

☆ Nickname: ‘Japan’s Treasure’.

☆ Birthday: 10th October.

☆ Current age: 18 (3rd year of high school)

☆ Zodiac: Libra.

☆ Birthplace: Kamakura City, Kanagawa Prefecture.

☆ Family: Mother. Father. Himself. Younger brother.

☆ Current height: 180 cm.

☆ Foot size: 26.5 cm

☆ Dominant foot: Left foot.

☆ Blood type: A.

☆ Starts playing football: At age 1. “Before I knew it, I was playing soccer.”

☆ Team before returning to Japan: RE・ALE (レ・アール) Youth FC.

☆ Favorite food/drink: Salted kelp tea (shio-kombucha). “Because I can go back to 0.” (meaning he feels refreshed after drinking it)

☆ Disliked food: French fries. “It’s deadly delicious but it’s deadly to my health.”

☆ Favorite animal: Seagulls. “I like migratory birds that doesn’t stay in one place.”

☆ Favorite season: At the end of summer. "It seems that the world is starting to get lonesome."

☆ Favorite football player: Álvaro Recoba. “The left footer that casts a rainbow (perfect curve) on the pitch.” (Sae was referring to Alvaro quotes: “If today's game is on a rainy pitch, I'll draw a rainbow with my left foot.”. Álvaro is known for his curling-free-kick.)

☆ Favorite music: ‘Mercury’ by tofubeats ft. Seira Kariya. “I listen to this to cool down.”

☆ Favorite manga: Gegege no Kitaro.

☆ Favorite movie: Taxi Driver. “This De Niro is the coolest.”

☆ Favorite TV show: Chibi Maruko-chan. “It reminds me of home.”

☆ Favorite brand: “All of my sponsors. They know they're not crazy for betting on me, they have good eyes.”

☆ Hobby: Analysing data of football players and teams. “It’s easier to see the numbers in visualized data.”

☆ Mushroom shoots vs Bamboo shoots: “Depends on the mood.”

☆ What goes best with rice : Salted kelp (shio-kombu). “They don’t have it in Brazil, so I asked my parents back home to send some here.”

☆ What makes him happy: “A play beyond my imagination.”

☆ What makes him upset: Being forced to carry Japanese soccer on his back. “I’m talking about you guys.”

☆ What he thinks his strength is: He has flat ways looking at things. (meaning he look at things objectively) "People often calls me dry**, but who cares?"

☆ What he thinks his weakness is: The fact that he doesn’t know anything else other than soccer. “You guys shouldn’t live this way.”

☆ Favorite/Best subject: “I don’t know since I’ve only focus on soccer and didn’t pay attention in classes.”

☆ What made him cry recently: “Like I'd tell you, idiot.”

☆ Usual sleeping time: 8 hours (7 hours sleeping + 1 hour nap)

☆ Place he washes first when taking a bath: His bangs’ hairline.

☆ Fixation: Buttocks. “You’ll know an athlete's ability by the shape of their buttocks.”

☆ Number of chocolates received from previous Valentine: Around 2000. “That’s what my manager told me.”

☆ The first time he got confessed to: “I don’t remember which one was the first, octopus.” (here, octopus is just an insult like 'idiot' or 'fool', etc.)

☆ What will he do if received 100 million yen: “I’m not interested in such small amount of money.”

☆ At what age he stops receiving presents from Santa: At age 10.

☆ What was his last wish from Santa: “My own talent that I haven’t yet seen.”

☆ How he spent his holiday: Gazing at the sea.

☆ What will he do during his last day on Earth: Give the world's best striker the world's best pass.

*Not sure about the exact pronounciation but the most of the translation says 'Les Halles'. Updated! (25/7/2024)

** In Japan, there are terms called ‘dry person’ & ‘wet person’. ‘Dry person’ is someone who can think rationally without being overwhelmed by emotions and because of their calm demeanor, they are thought to be cold and unapproachable. ‘Wet person’ is the opposite of ‘dry person’.

note: i want to apologize in advance for any mistake made in the translation!

#blue lock #itoshi sae #trivia: itoshi sae #trivia: profile #bluelocksource #trivia #to those who reblog before changes made i'm really sorry #there was no info on his 'visual acuity'#he doesn't have bad eyeseight #really sorry about that #admin han #our translation

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faketrex · 9 days

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18, please!!

Thank you, friend ash! 💝 Prompt 18 is, "the end of the line at a b-list movie star’s meet-and-greet."

RWRB AU with a meet-cute. Obviously.

...

"He's not a fucking b-lister, he's an independent."

"Okay–"

"The Maple Season made me cry, Nora. Twice. It's fucking art. When's the last time a movie made you cry?"

"And that's not related to the fact that for two months each year, your blood turns into pumpkin spice syrup, like some kind of extremely basic seasonal werewolf?"

"Nora–"

"I'm happy for you, really. So are you going to come to dinner and tell us all about it after you meet your idol, or not?"

Alex shuffles forward. There are only two people ahead of him in the line now; only fifteen feet or so between Alex and Rafael Luna. He might need to lie on the floor in his apartment for a while after this is over. Then again, hanging out with Nora and June might help him chill the fuck out. And carbs, carbs would definitely help, in both beer and French fry form.

"Save me a seat. I'll be there." He hangs up. The line inches forward.

And then, all of a sudden, it's his turn. Rafael Luna is seated right in front of him, all dramatic cheekbones and horn-rimmed glasses and crisp button-up with the sleeves rolled and the collar wide open.

Alex panics.

"The Maple Season made me cry," he blurts.

Luna smiles and raises his eyebrows. "In a good way, I hope?"

"Fucking–I mean, yes, definitely, in the best way." Alex sets his poster down on the table between them, watching as Luna pulls it closer and peels off the sticky note with ALEX written on it. "That scene in the barn? After Oliver loses the race? It's fucking heart-wrenching. I can't believe you didn't win the Best Supporting Actor Oscar."

"You're very kind," Luna says with another grin, "but usually you have to be nominated for an award in order to win it."

Alex laughs. "Well, yeah, of course. I'm sure you're going to get there someday, though. The Academy would be criminally stupid not to recognize you for everything you've done. And–" He takes a deep breath. This is it. "And–I wish I'd seen queer Latino representation like yours on-screen ten years ago."

"Thank you. I really appreciate that, Alex." Luna, Rafael fucking Luna, looks right into Alex's eyes as he says it, making Alex's knees wobble in a way that he's already planning to leave out of the story when he tells it to Nora and June. "I'm lucky to have fans like you who make it so rewarding to keep doing what I love."

"No, thank you," Alex responds. "I mean–seriously."

"Would you like a photo with Mr. Luna?"

"Oh, sure." At the assistant's prompting, Alex turns to face the camera, trying to focus on smiling while wracking his brain about whether there's anything else he absolutely needs to tell Luna now, during what might be his only shot to ever do so. When the assistant steps away again, though, all Alex's thoughts come to a complete halt.

The next person waiting in line is tall and broad-shouldered, with blond hair that sweeps over his forehead. He's got a rolled poster under one arm and a book under the other, like he's been spending his time in line reading instead of scrolling on his phone like a normal person. Alex blinks slowly at him as their eyes meet, feeling like a deer in headlights. Luna is right behind him still, but all Alex can focus on now is this man–

"Alex?"

"Thank you," Alex repeats reflexively, breaking out of his daze and turning back around to pick up his signed poster and roll it carefully. "It was so great to meet you."

"Take care," Luna replies, and that's it, it's over, Alex moves to the left, out of the line, and out the door.

When Alex gets outside, it feels like he's forgotten to do something important–like breathe, maybe–for the entire time he was talking with Luna. He zips up his jacket with his free hand, still holding the poster in the other. He closes his eyes for a second. He needs some French fries and a beer, for real.

"In my opinion," someone to Alex's left says, "he's one of the best artists of his generation."

"What?"

"I mean, there's no one who compares, really," the man continues. It's the blond who'd been in line just behind Alex. "Did you hear that his next project is going to open at the Venice festival?"

"Fucking finally, right? He deserves it."

"He certainly does."

Alex watches while the guy pulls a rubber band out of his pocket and slides it around his own rolled poster. He should probably say something, but his brain seems to have called an intermission on thinking. It's the post-Luna effect, probably. Or maybe–

"I apologize if I've bothered you," the man finally says after a few moments of silence, fiddling with his poster. "I'll–"

"No, no, you're good," Alex interrupts, reassuring. "It's cool. I think we're on the same page. I'm Alex."

"I'm Henry."

"Nice to meet you."

"It's my pleasure," Henry replies. "And I hope you don't mind my saying so, but I really just wanted to tell you–The Maple Season made me cry, too. I went through a entire box of tissues."

Maybe Alex should feel embarrassed or something, but the shy, sheepish smile on Henry's face is making his knees do the wobbly thing all over again.

...

"Tell me about it," Alex drawls, and when he blinks slowly at Henry from under his eyelashes, he's gratified to see that Henry's cheeks turn pink, enough that it's visible even in the dim evening light.

(Alex is late to dinner, but he ends up getting not only Luna's autograph, but also Henry's phone number. It's a pretty stellar evening, all things considered.)

#faketrex writes #setting prompts #do they watch The Maple Season together at some point?#yes they do #and Alex crows about it when Nora eventually watches it and cries too #firstprince fic #fandom: intro to international relations

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blueskylinesx · 18 days

Text

Tomato Red - Chapter 5

Parings: Jesse Cash x Female Reader

Warnings/Triggers: Language, anxiety/nervousness, sexual tension, fluff, masturbation, oral, smut, kissing/making out, self doubt, friends to lovers, mentions of Covid, talks of blood, scrapes, and gashes, abusive relationships, jealousy, arguments/disagreements.

Summary: The local cafe/bookstore down the street was Jesse's usual hang out spot where he spent hours reading books and working on music. Until one day when he meets a new barista working the bookstore cafe. Suddenly, Jesse's reasons for visiting the bookstore down the road were no longer just for reading and work... but were suddenly meant for much more.

Author’s Note: Buckle in you guys cause this chapter gets pretty steamy. You're in for a bumpy ride.

Tag List: @thefallennightmare @collidewiththesav @artificialbreezy @thatchickwiththecamera @cncohshit @lma1986 @arkiliastuff @lonelydragonlady @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @chewyylynn

If you would like to be added to the tags list let me know! I would be happy to do so!😊

Thank you all SO fucking much for all the support on Tomato Red. It means the absolute world to me. Writing this story has been so fun and helps keep my mind occupied. I love you all so so so much!☕️🍅

READER

The old school diner jukebox echoed off the walls of the restaurant as it played an Elvis Presley song. The salt from my french fries still clung to the bottom of my fingertips and the leftover taste from the diet cola still lingered on the back of my tongue.

Jesse sat in the booth across from me sipping on his orange creamsicle milkshake and occasionally picking at his burger. I couldn’t help my eyes from lingering on the way his hand would grip around the tall glass cup. Wondering how his fingertips would feel tracing along my skin. I licked my lips as the thoughts kept pushing their way through to the forefront of my mind.

Jesse was dressed in a long sleeve black sweater and a pair of tan pants. His messy curls framing his face perfectly, per usual. His appearance definitely didn’t go unnoticed by me or the young girl who was working the hostess stand. She was practically drooling the moment Jesse walked in through the front door.

I know I had no right to be getting jealous especially since me and Jesse weren’t together. But I did not appreciate her lingering gaze on him or the way her face fell with disappointment once I had emerged from behind him.

“Oh well hellooo there, welcome in! Will it be just one dining in tonight?”

“Actually, it will be the both of us.” Jesse responded back while wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me closer inside.

With a snarky remark under her breath the young hostess grabbed two menus out from behind the stand and motioned for me and Jesse to follow behind her, “Right this way then.”

When we came up to the booth I didn’t miss the way she stared daggers into the side of my face or the force she used when she slapped my menu down on the table. Making sure she gently set Jesse’s down before twirling the ends of her brunette strands, and then strutting back off towards the front of the restaurant.

I did my best to not let her affect my time with Jesse. Afterall, I was the one who was sitting here in this booth across from him.

“How is everything tasting?” Our server asked while picking up my glass of cola to refill it.

Shifting my focus from Jesse and over to the young gentleman who was standing at the side of our table, “Everything is wonderful, thank you so much.” I responded back with a smile.

“It’s my pleasure, is there anything else that I can get you two?”

Jesse cleared his throat before replying, “I think we are okay, thank you.” His chocolate brown eyes flashed up at me and the butterflies that always found their way to the pit of my stomach crashed inside me like a tidal wave.

I still couldn’t comprehend how out of everyone in this world, that it was me sitting here across from him, right now, in this moment. Although I could reach out and touch him, anytime I was with Jesse I always found myself second guessing if it was real.

Jesse outstretched his arm across the table, tilting his now half empty cup at me, “Go on, take a sip for yourself before I finish this thing off.” He brought the cup up closer to my mouth, the straw he had been sipping on just inches away from my lips.

I dusted the leftover salt residue from my fingertips and reached out to grab the straw, leaning closer to begin sipping from the cup that Jesse was still holding. His eyes intently staring down at my lips.

The cold taste of orange filled my mouth and I swallowed it down hard with a smile, “Hm I guess that is pretty good or whatever.”

Jesse let out a laugh, “Don’t act like that’s not the best thing you’ve ever tasted.”

Considering I’ve never tasted him, I couldn’t give a fair answer.

I rolled my eyes and adjusted back down comfortably in the booth, “Considering there’s still a lot that I have yet to taste I don’t know if I can say it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted. Guess we'll just have to wait and see, huh?”

Jesse’s eyes flicked up from my lips, tracing every inch of my face. Before sticking out his tongue to quickly wet his lips he glanced back down towards the corner of my mouth. “Here, you have a little bit left over, may I?” He leaned against the table and motioned towards my mouth.

My cheeks instantly engulfed in flames and the pink hue flushing from under my skin certainly put my embarrassment on display, “Oh god, do I have milkshake on my face?”

Jesse’s thumb gently brushed along my bottom lip, scooping up the leftover orange liquid. “Don’t worry, it’s cute.” He teased before inserting his thumb in between his lips to suck off the leftover residue.

Holy. Fuck.

My stomach was in a messed up wad of knotts. I struggled to catch my breath and my pussy clenched from inside my jeans. I wanted so badly to pull Jesse in and slam him against this table and have my way with him.

I pushed the intrusive thoughts to the back of my mind and focused my breathing. Jesse’s eyes never leaving my face.

“You know...” Jesse started with a slight sigh, “I take back what I said earlier. That may have been the best thing that I’ve tasted, actually.” He ran a hand through his curls and gave me a wink before turning back down to sip the rest of the milkshake that rested at the bottom of the glass.

I bit the skin around my nails as a way to grasp at whatever confidence I could muster up, “the milkshake, or me?” I asked with a sly smirk.

“You. Definitely.”

My leg was anxiously bouncing underneath the table and I brushed my clammy hands up and down my thighs in an attempt to gain control over all the feelings that were coursing through my veins.

Me and Jesse have had multiple conversations before but none like this, none that were this intense. His stare burned into my skin and it set my soul on fire. Although this restaurant held multiple other people, no one existed around us in this moment. It was just me and Jesse.

I can’t remember the last time I felt like this. I was riding on a Jesse high that I hoped I’d never come down from. Every time we were together my soul felt like it finally found a piece of a puzzle that had been missing forever. I no longer felt like I was stumbling through every day barely grasping at whatever meaning I thought my life was meant for.

For what has felt like forever, I was always within reach but forever unable to hold any sort of purpose within my grasp. But never with Jesse, never when he was next to me and by my side. Jesse was the purpose my soul so desperately longed to find and now that it was here and in my grasp I was so scared to let it slip through the cracks.

Our server returned to our table to collect our plates and Jesse’s completely cleared milkshake cup, “Is it going to be on one check?”

Jesse arched up out of the booth, pulling his wallet out from his back pocket and opening it up to pull out the cash from the back pouch, “It will all be on one check.” He tucked the cash into the waiter's front apron pocket, “don’t worry about the change man, thank you for everything.”

“Of course! You two have a wonderful rest of your night and come back soon.” He replied before carrying the stack of dishes to the back kitchen.

Jesse stepped out of the booth and smoothed his shirt down against his core before extending out his hand to help me to my feet, “you ready to get out of here?”

“As long as it’s with you, I’m ready to go anywhere.” With our hands now interlocked we made our way towards the front door, and I made sure to give the hostess that we saw on the way in a nice little wink before me and Jesse made our way back outside and into his car.

JESSE

The ignition clicked and with the sound of the engine starting the radio came on and began playing Sugar by Beach Fossils.

“Oh my gosh! I love this song!” Y/N exclaimed. “It’s the ultimate feel good song.”

I agreed with a nod and backed out of the parking lot, reaching over to turn the volume up before finally pulling out onto the empty late night road. The street lamps and glows from the restaurant sign cascading in through the window, highlighting Y/N’s pale skin in the darkness of the confined space.

I glanced over at her as she sang along to the words, “It’s nice outside, do you mind if I roll the windows down?”

“Please!” She responded with a smile and I had to grip the steering wheel to hold myself up. I pressed the button on the door and the two front windows began rolling down. The LA breeze brushing in through the windows and carrying around Y/N’s scent with it.

Her silk long hair blew around erratically and she stuck her hand out the window letting it glide along with the wind. She closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the headrest as she continued to sing along to the words of the song. My heart was completely mesmerized by the sight that was next to me.

Y/N looked absolutely ethereal, the way the street lights casted her in a warm glow and the scent of her strawberry perfume completely took over all my senses. I began to find myself envious of the wind that was able to wrap itself entirely around her.

I set my right hand down on the arm rest next to me and let my fingers tap along to the music and began to sing along with her, our voices intertwining in harmony as they echoed off the confines of the car.

“Have I ever told you how beautiful your singing voice is, Jesse?”

My heart stopped in place. I was always my own worst critic when it came to my voice and overall work with music. I’ve had others tell me before they thought my voice was pleasant or sounded nice. Which was always very kind to hear, although I was always hesitant to believe it for myself.

However, those words coming from her sounded so sweet in a way that I’ve never heard before. The softness in her voice radiated through my skin and pierced through every portion of my heart. I couldn’t help the wide grin from spreading across my cheeks.

The song had ended and I soaked in the few moments of the quiet calm that saturated the air around us. I turned my head to take her in once again, her beauty always taking the breath right out of me. “You know, I’ve had many people tell me the same thing before. But it never quite hit like that one just did.”

“Hopefully in a good way, I hope?”

“In the best way.” I responded back, without an ounce of falseness behind my words.

“So, where ya taking me?” Y/N asked with a slight poke to my shoulder.

“Well, I know it’s getting late but I guess I’m being selfish and wanted to keep you to myself for a little longer tonight… if that's okay with you? I turned to ask.

“Any time that I get with you is always a bonus.”

“Great, cause if you gave me any other answer then I guess I was just gonna have to kidnap you.” I joked with a grin.

I pulled into the driveway of my house parking in my usual spot behind Michael’s car. I already planned to bring Y/N back to my house tonight, remembering my promise to her from the last time we hung out about our next Ghost Adventures marathon being at my place.

I put the car in park and my nerves suddenly started to fester, starting in my toes and working their way up to my fingertips. God I hope that the roommates are anywhere other than in the living room, I thought to myself.

I was able to slip out of the house earlier without any of them seeing me, so I knew if they saw me walk in with Y/N at this time of night, it was sure to peak an annoying interest followed by question after question.

I hopped out from the driver's seat and walked around to open the door to help Y/N out of the car. I lead her through the dewy grass and up to the steps of the front door. “Be careful of that last step, for some reason they made the gap bigger than the other steps.” I warned while going to insert my key into the lock.

“Awh FUCK!” I heard echo off the street behind me. I quickly turned around to see Y/N stumbling onto the pavement below her. She outstretched her arms in an attempt to catch herself but it was a feeble attempt.

She landed hard against the concrete steps and started grasping at her knee, “I’m such a klutz oh my god. I’m so sorry Jesse!”

I quickly came to her side, “Are you apologizing for falling?”

“Uh yeah, I guess I am.” Her eyes were watery and with the shakiness of her voice I could tell she was trying to fight back the tears.

“Y/N, you don’t ever have to apologize for something like this. If anything, I’m sorry that my stairs are a dick.” I bent down to help her to her feet, “Are you okay? Nothing is broken?”

She winced once she tried to put pressure on her left leg, “I don’t think so, but I think I scraped my knee up pretty badly.”

I glanced down and noticed the small blood stain that was starting to form from under her jeans right above her knee cap, “Here let’s get you inside and get you cleaned up.” I wrapped my arm around her shoulders in an attempt to help motion her towards the front door, but I could tell from the look on her face that she was in more pain than she wanted me to know.

I knew she would fight me on this so without second guessing it I swooped her up into my arms and began to carry her towards the front door.

“Jesse! I can walk! Please, put me down. I know I’m heavy and I don’t want you to hurt yourself and blow a knee cap out too!” She exclaimed while wildly waving her arms around.

“First off, you are the last thing from heavy. Secondly, not a chance in hell. You’re on my watch and I can’t let you walk into my house for the first time with a blown out knee cap, what kind of monster would my roommates think I was?” I jokingly bantered back at her.

She quickly gave up the fight and eased into me. Wrapping her arms around my neck as I carried her in through the front door. As we made our way into the living room we were met with six sets of eyes immediately landing on us.

Michael, Noah, and Jolly were all sitting on the couch and I could feel their stares so intently that they were burning into my skin leaving indentations. I chuckled nervously as I continued to make my way towards the staircase with Y/N still in my arms, “Uhhh, hey guys.”

I tried to avoid eye contact at all costs, keeping my main focus on getting Y/N upstairs into the bathroom as soon as possible so I could help bandage her up. But once my foot landed against the carpet of the first step Noah immediately came up to my side, “Yo, everything alright?” He asked while itching the bottom of his chin.

“Yeah, Y/N took a nasty fall on the steps outside so I’m gonna get her upstairs and help get her all cleaned up.” Without wasting any more time I hurried up the rest of the stairs and quickly scrambled into the bathroom.

I walked in and set Y/N onto the countertop shutting the door behind us. “Jesse, seriously, you don’t have to do this. I don’t want to cause you any more trouble than I already have.”

I bent down to open up the cabinet doors underneath her and pulled out the bottle of hydrogen peroxide, a handful of cotton balls, and a box of bandaids. “Y/N, the last thing that you ever cause me is trouble.” After setting everything down on the counter beside her I grabbed one of the cotton balls holding it over the sink as I poured a few drops of the peroxide onto it.

With the wet cotton ball in one hand I made my way over to stand in front of her, stopping before I inched any closer in between her legs, “alright now let's assess the damage.”

She began tugging up on her left pant leg, slightly wincing as the denim material brushed past the gash on her knee. A light trail of blood was slowly inching down her leg and I bent down to make face level with the fresh cuts and scrapes.

I gently held her leg in one hand while applying the cotton ball to the gash on her knee with the other, “you know, you’re kind of a bad ass.” I said while continuing to clean the area around her cut.

“I’m glad you think so even though I was totally seconds away from crying.” She admitted with a sheepish smile.

With her knee now blood free I reached up for the box of bandaids and pulled one out of the box, removing the backing. “If it were me, I totally would have cried. Like a little baby, screams and all.” I joked.

I applied the bandaid to her knee and made sure to flatten it out so that it was safely secured. “Thank you doctor Jesse for coming to my rescue.” She replied while tucking the hair that had been falling into her face behind her ear.

“Anytime, Y/N.” I responded right before leaning down to lay a gentle kiss over the bandaid. “All better now.” I then pushed off of my knees to stand up so I could stand face to face with her.

I was now tucked into the small confines in between her legs. Our cores pushed up against one another and I sucked in a breath when I noticed how close our lips were. I could almost taste her breath on my mouth.

I went to grab on to the closest thing to hold myself up, not realizing that my hands were now gripping Y/N’s thighs. She let out a slight gasp and I suddenly felt her warm hands pressed up against my sides. Our lips just barely scraping against each other.

“Jesse”, she breathed against my lips. Her warm breath fanned against my mouth and her hands slid up my core to grip at the front of my shirt. She pulled me in closer to her, “can I thank you for bandaging me up?” Her voice barely above a whisper.

“I’d like that very much.” Her lips crashed against mine and I tightly shut my eyes to take in the taste of her. I pulled my hands up from her legs to now hold her face in between my hands, brushing my thumb along the smooth skin of her cheek.

My mind was going a million miles a minute. Her lips were softer than anything I’ve ever known, like biting into cotton candy. The sweetness overtaking every one of my senses and I knew that after tonight, I would find myself forever craving the taste.

I gently pulled away to rest my forehead up against hers, my eyes still closed and my hands still holding her face, “remember what I said back at the diner about that leftover milkshake on your mouth being the best thing I ever tasted?”

She responded with a nod, “hmm I think so.”

“Well I take it back. That right there, that was the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” I leaned back in to lay another gentle kiss against her lips. Our eyes both closed again as we took in the scent of one another, the warmness radiating off of our bodies intertwining as one.

NOAH

My feet bounded off of the carpeted staircases and I ran my hands along the wooden railing. Jolly, Michael, and I had spent the last hour rewatching one of our favorite horror films Hereditary. Usually Jesse takes place in our movie nights but lately it seems like he’s barely home these days.

I inched closer through the hallway and stopped at the bathroom door to my right. I placed my hand upon the golden door handle and went to push it open but it was locked. With a sigh I gave the door a few soft knocks with the top of my knuckle, “Yo Jesse, you in there? I gotta take a piss could you hurry it up?”

It was silent for a moment and then the door slowly opened, Y/N halting before me. “I’m so sorry. I had some blood stained on my jeans from earlier so Jesse lent me a pair of sweats to change into. I hope you weren’t waiting out here for long.” She said with a frown across her face.

“Oh, uh I’m sorry I didn’t realize you were the one inside. That’s my bad, sorry if I came off like a dick.” I ran a hand through my hair and Y/N made her way past me and back out into the hallway.

“No worries! I get it”, she said with a nervous chuckle. I gave her one more once over and a friendly smile before stepping into the bathroom. I definitely did not miss the half smeared lipstick on her bottom lip or the fact that she was wearing Jesse’s favorite pair of blue sweatpants. That guy never even let me borrow those when we were on tour.

As I went to close the door behind me my nosey eyes lingered on Y/N as she made her way back over into Jesse’s room, closing the door behind her. I was happy that Jesse found someone that he really seemed to kick it off with. Especially given the circumstances with his previous relationship.

When Jesse first moved in with us after leaving Nashville he was in pretty bad shape from his last break up. He would lock himself up in his room a lot or go off and wander down to the coffee shops in town to clear his head. When we finally got the studio set up in the house, he started coming around more.

When Covid hit and everyone was stuck in the house that's when me and Jesse got really close. We would spend hours locked up in the studio together, sometimes even until 4am just getting lost in whatever it was we were working on at the time. We would sometimes find ourselves talking about life and Jesse and I both opened up and confided in each other a lot during that time.

Jesse was like my brother and I know that he is fully capable of making the right choices for himself. But that still didn’t keep me from being a bit nervous now that this new girl was involved. I just hoped that Jesse was being smart and taking things slow and that Y/N wasn’t like the other typical girls here in LA.

I flushed the toilet and made my way over to the sink to wash my hands. I noticed the left over band aid rappers that were littered on the counter and rolled my eyes in agitation. I dried my hands off on the towel that hung on the wall beside the sink and scooped up the left behind scraps and tossed them into the trash.

Before making my way out into the hallway I pulled out my phone to send Jesse a text…

NOAH: Any idea why there was leftover band aid trash all over the counter?

JESSE: No idea what you’re talking about, must have been Jolly or Michael.

With another deep sigh escaping from under my breath I clicked off the phone screen and slid it into my back pocket. Making my way down the hallway past Jesse’s bedroom door and back downstairs. Please don’t hurt my friend, Y/N. I thought to myself before sliding back down on the couch cushion before me.

READER

I sat on the edge of Jesse’s bed with my legs pulled into my chest and my arms wrapped around them. Jesse was currently sitting in his black office chair with his red Ibanez guitar placed into his lap.

His fingers twisted the silver knobs that lined the wooden headstock while his other hand strummed along the strings trying to find the right tune. My eyes lingered intently on Jesse, finding comfort in his concentration.

The way his hands graced up and down the guitar so effortlessly, like they were made to be there. I could sit here and watch him for hours, we wouldn’t even have to say a word. I would be perfectly peaceful in our own little bubble, right here, with Jesse being the only thing in my focus as the notes he played echoed through my ears.

He strummed a few more notes and nodded his head in approval, “Alright I think I got it right where it needs to be.” He cleared his throat and glanced back over at me, “So this is one of my band's songs, it happens to be my favorite. I figured I would give you a little taste just so you can see what you’re in for before treading to our show.” A smile now spread across his face and his teeth glistened in the warm glimmer of the small desk lamp beside him.

“Alright, this one is called Vanish Canvas. JT isn’t here so I’ll be filling in his parts for him, I don't have the lungs for all the screamy shit but -”

“Jesse, I’m sure it’s going to sound beautiful.” I reassured him with a wink and gestured for him to continue.

He let out a nervous breath and began strumming a melodic tune on the guitar.

“Your star burns and dies out a thousand times over, but still remains a source of light to guide you home.”

I sucked in a breath at the way his voice slammed into me. I have never heard anything so blissful before in my entire life. I continued to keep focus on his hands as they strummed against the strings. I’ve never seen Jesse more beautiful than at this moment.

“In flight or in freefall, glide along the evergreen. Motes of dust resembling constellations.”

His eyes shut and I mirrored him as we both swayed along in harmony. I have never heard anyone sing so perfectly before. The absolute adoration that I had for the man before me completely consumed me.

I held my hand over my chest, right over my heart. Continuing to sway along as Jesse sang the rest of the song. My eyes found his lips and flashbacks from the way they tasted earlier against mine started to race through my mind.

Sweet and citrusy reminiscing of the taste from the milkshake we shared hours before. I was never a huge fan of orange flavors however, after tonight I’ll forever find myself craving for it.

“Let this moment break your heart. Something greater to impart. Anxieties that you try to pacify will keep you going under.”

Not only was I taken back by the sight of Jesse before me and his voice, but the lyrics that he was singing were so powerful, like nothing I’ve ever heard before. I sat there and began to wonder what inspired them and if these were words Jesse had written himself.

He continued to sing and strum along and would occasionally glance up at me with those golden chocolate eyes. We would hold contact for a few moments before he would glance back down at the guitar or shut his eyes. He strummed a few more notes and then swung the guitar over to his side to place it back on the stand next to his desk.

Pushing his hands off of his knees he stood up and made his way over to the bed to sit next to me, “Soooo, did I completely butcher that and make you decide to stay home instead?” He stifled behind a nervous laugh.

“The complete opposite actually.” I responded while biting the bottom of my lip. I rested my hand on the mattress beside me to lean back a bit. “You have the most beautiful singing voice I’ve ever heard, Jesse. I’m not saying that either just because you’re sitting here next to me. The way you looked just now over there, holding your guitar and just completely in your element… I absolutely can’t wait to see you out on stage.

Just the thought of him on stage while I get to watch him doing what he loves sent a giddy pulse through my veins. My fingertips tapped against the emerald green blanket below us in excitement and when I looked over at Jesse I couldn’t help the way my pussy also clenched in excitement.

Something glistened in his eyes and it made me suck in a breath. His hand reached up and cupped my cheek, his calloused fingers rubbing along my cheekbone, “You know, you made it really hard to focus over there. It took everything in me to keep from sprinting over here to taste you again.”

He inched in closer to me, our lips now barely apart and I could feel his warm breath slam against my face. “Well isn’t that a coincidence? Because I also sat here thinking about the taste of your lips back on mine.” I said barely above a whisper.

Jesse slid his hand down my face and slowly traced his fingertips along my neck leaving a trail of goosebumps behind. His hand made its way back behind my hair to cup the back of my neck and he gripped me tightly like he was afraid that I’d slip away. “You know, this is going to become a problem. As if it wasn’t bad enough that you’re all I think about... now I’m going to have to add the taste of your lips to that list.”

I hummed against his lips desperate to finally taste them again. I stuck my tongue out to lick my lips and it brushed along the bottom of Jesse’s and I could feel him shiver in my touch. The quick taste of him sent a burning sensation down the back of my throat and my heartbeat was racing so fast that the sound began to ring in my ears.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Y/N.” Jesse whispered against my mouth before he finally pulled me in closer to him, hands still gripping tightly against the back of my neck and our lips crashed against each other, this time more desperate than the first kiss. Both of our breathing began to pick up pace and I let my hand slip up into the confines of Jesse’s messy curls.

I lightly tugged on them as a way to bring Jesse in closer to me. I needed more of him, I needed him so desperately in a way that I’ve never had him before. I wanted him to have every single part of me, I’d gladly give it all away for Jesse to have and to hold within his grasp forever.

His tongue crashed against my lips and I let my mouth open to let it completely fill my mouth. My pussy was on fire and I knew that my panties were soaked from the coldness that was pressed against my folds.

Mine and Jesse’s tongues rubbed against each other and I moaned into his mouth fully taking in the taste of him. Our breathing was hot and heavy and Jesse laid me down onto the mattress, I opened my legs to let him crawl on top of me and once his thighs were situated at my sides I slid my hands up his shirt to scrape my fingers along the warm skin of his chest.

He moaned into my touches and bit his bottom lip while he stared down at me in hunger. “Fuck, I can’t get over how beautiful you look. Seeing you in my sweats really fucking did it for me and now I just wanna see how you look outside of them.”

I hooked my hand around his neck and pulled his face down to mine and pressed my lips up against his mouth, “I want you to take them off of me, Jesse. Undress me and devour me for the rest of the night.”

“Fuuuuck.” He whispered against my mouth. “God I want you so fucking bad.” He laid another chaste kiss against my lips and then motioned his hand down along my stomach, inching his fingers underneath the waistband of the blue sweatpants that covered my bottom half.

I leaned up closer to him to give him some room to tug them off of me. The cold air from the room brushed along my skin leaving goosebumps behind the trail of Jesse’s fingertips. Once my legs were completely free of the dark blue cotton, he let the sweatpants fall onto the bedroom floor below us.

I now laid underneath Jesse in nothing but my white lace thong and my pink t-shirt. He hovered over me with his arms outstretched down at my sides while his curls laid messily in front of his face, his eyes barely peeking out from underneath the strands.

His eyes looked me up and down and I could see the hunger festering behind his chocolate pupils. He licked his lips as his eyes slowly traced over every inch and curve of my body. “I just can’t get over how fucking beautiful you are, Y/N.” He whispered down to me.

He leaned back down to press another kiss to my lips but when he went to pull away I let my teeth cling to his bottom lip, tugging it lightly between my teeth as he slowly pulled back. I let my hands drag up under his shirt to grab at the bottom material and began to tug it upwards over his head. Tossing his shirt onto the floor to meet the sweatpants that clung to my body moments before.

His bare tattooed chest was now on full display before me and I moaned in pleasure at the sight of him. My eyes traced over the eagle and the Native American tattoos on his chest and then down to the tiger and roses tattoo on his stomach. I wanted to brush my tongue along every single inch of him, dying to know what every area of him tasted like.

The only thing separating the skin of our bodies was just the few lingering pieces of clothing that now felt more like a nuisance. Jesse pressed his core into me and I could feel his hard cock pushing against the nook between my thigh and my pussy. I was so desperate for him, crumbling entirely underneath his hold.

He began to leave kisses down my neck, then to my collarbone, and slowly down my stomach. His head now found its way between my thighs and I bent my legs up to shield him into me. His tongue now trailed around the lace that tucked up against my folds and his tongue came so close to slipping under the material my legs wobbled at the sensation.

“I have one last thing that I’d like to taste tonight, if that's okay?” Jesse breathed into the side of my thigh and I gripped at the blanket beneath me. “It’s more than okay.” I whispered back while lifting my hips from the bed to help him pull my panties down my legs.

He tucked his fingers into the band of my thong and I sucked in a breath knowing that I would soon be on full display for him. I began to wonder if he would like what he’d see, if my body was good enough or if it looked weird in the shadows of the light. I tried to push the thoughts to the back of my mind because the sight in front of me was way more important.

I wasn’t about to let my brain ruin this moment for me. It’s been so long since I was last intimate with someone. The last person I had sex with was my ex boyfriend Jake a few weeks before we had broken up. I told myself that if I ever had sex with another man after him that they would have to be special.

But special was an understatement when it came to Jesse. He was fucking perfect and right here in this moment, he was mine.

He left a kiss on top of my pussy before he went to slowly pull my panties down. As the material was just about to reach the top of my folds a loud ring followed by vibrating echoes buzzed off of the wooden nightstand next to the bed beside us.

My pussy was just inches away from being on full display and at this time, the nerves that sunk in and hit me like a train were no longer from the possible disappointment Jesse may have when I was fully uncovered before him, but were now stimming from his ringing phone.

He let out a deep sigh of agitation, “I guess I’m going to have to start putting my phone on DND when we’re together.” He lightly chuckled into my inner thigh before pushing himself off the bed to reach for his phone. “Who the fuck would even be calling me right now?” He leaned over beside me grabbing his phone and adjusting his eyes to the bright light from the screen. “Fucking JT. I’m so sorry I know this is a really fucking bad time but I have to take this, it may be important.”

“Oh- uh- yeah, I understand, no worries.” I swallowed thickly while propping up onto my elbows. The cold air still hitting against my legs from when Jesse was propped between them just moments ago. Goosebumps lined my skin and the intensity of sitting here on this bed almost completely naked started to consume me.

Jesse was now sitting on the opposite edge of the bed with his back turned towards me, “This better be fucking important.” Jesse spoke into the phone. I silently rolled over to sweep my legs off of the mattress, the cold wood from the floor brushed against the bottom of my soles as I made a quiet attempt to stand up from the bed.

“I’ll let Noah know that you sent over everything, I’m sure he’ll be stoked to know that you’re on board.” I bent down to pick up my pants from earlier off of the floor, Jesse was too involved in his conversation to even notice that I was no longer laying behind him. Before going to pull my pants back up over my legs I turned to steal one last glance at the back of Jesse, replaying all of what just happened between us minutes ago. The image of my fingers still coiling through his brown curls flashing before me.

With my jeans fully up my legs I zipped up the metal zipper and fastly buttoned them. “Well, can we discuss this all maybe tomorrow? I’m currently in the middle of something and you could not have called at a more inconvenient time.” I grabbed my phone out of my purse and sent a quick text to Kate. My heart was beating so loud in my chest that I was sure it was about to erupt through my throat at any moment.

With a disappointed sigh I slid my phone into my back pocket and made my way over to Jesse’s bedroom door reaching for the handle before me. “Hey, where are you going? Everything okay?” The sounds of the mattress crumpling underneath Jesse echoed through the room as he clicked his phone off and turned around to face me.

I twisted the handle and looked down at my feet before pulling the door open, “Uh- yeah, I just feel really bad that I was here this late and caused any issues with you and your band. The last thing I want to do is cause any kind of inconvenience.”

Jesse stepped up from the bed and began to make his way over towards me, “What? No, Y/N you’re not an inconvenience.” He ran a distressed hand through his curls, “ I’m so sorry that he called in the middle of what was going on. I feel fucking terrible, normally I would ignore it but with the shows coming up and the work on the new album I didn’t want there to be any sort of emergency or something that came up and they couldn’t get ahold of me.”

“You don’t have to explain Jesse, I promise I understand. I’m not mad at you. This is your job and it’s extremely fucking important and I don’t ever want to get in the way of that.” My phone buzzed in my back pocket and I knew it was Kate responding to the text I sent her. “I don’t want to continue to be in the way or make you feel like you have to choose between me and things that matter Jesse.”

“But you do matter Y/N, you matter so fucking much to me.” Jesse came around the bed and was now only a few inches away from me. I tucked the loose strand of hair behind my ear and finally pulled the bedroom door open to be greeted by the cool wind bursting in from the hallway. He reached out to place hand on my shoulder but I made my way out into the hallway before he could make contact.

“I texted Kate and asked her to come pick me up, so you don’t have to worry about driving me back home.” I made my way closer to the staircase and I could see Jesse fast on my trail from my peripherals. “Y/N, please. Would you stop? Can we just go back into the room before JT called and everything got so messed up?”

My eyes watered and the air from how fast I was walking down the stairs made them burn and I had to quickly blink my eyes to continue fighting back the tears of guilt. I didn’t want to leave, I didn’t want to leave Jesse, I wanted to go back upstairs in that room with him and go back into the bubble we both found ourselves in before his phone rang. But for some reason I couldn’t stop my feet from moving under me.

“I’m sorry Jesse.” That was all I could say. I was sorry, I was SO fucking sorry. I’m sorry that I got in the way and I’m sorry that I can’t fucking stay. The intense amount of guilt that weighed over me like a rain cloud before it finally erupts over a crackle of loud thunder. I couldn’t breathe and all I wanted to do was to just get out of here. I needed fresh air, I needed a minute to think, I just needed everything to stop.

I finally reached the last step and I turned to see Jesse standing halfway down the staircase gripping the wooden railing, his chest heavily rising and falling as his disheveled curls fell into his face, “Y/N please, don’t go.”

I stood in front of the front door and pulled it open, seeing Kate’s blue mini cooper parked outside with her passenger side window down. Before finally stepping out of the house I turned back around to face Jesse with tears rolling down my cheeks, “I’m so sorry, Jesse.” Before he could respond I bolted out of the house and closed the door behind me, running over to Kate’s car and slipping into the passenger seat to bury my head into my lap while we drove down the street and Jesse’s house slowly faded away in the rear view mirror behind us.

JESSE

It had been three days. Three days since the night I last saw Y/N. After she walked out the front door that night I sent her a text message asking her what happened…

Me: What happened back there? Did I hurt you? Did I do something wrong?

Read.

Me: Please Y/N, just let me know you made it home safe.

Y/N: I made it home safe.

Y/N: I’m so sorry, Jesse.

Me: Can we please talk? Can I call you??

Read.

I didn’t want to push her any further so I left it at that. It was killing me inside, eating away at me that I didn’t know what was going on inside of her head or how she was feeling. I don’t know how everything went so wrong so fast. If I would have known the night would have ended like that I never would have picked up that phone. Fuck, why did I pick up the fucking phone?!?!

ERRA was still set to play our set this weekend, the same show I invited Y/N out to come and watch. I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t consumed with the thoughts of whether or not she would still show. I debated on going to the cafe to see if she was there, so I could pull her aside and talk to her, ask her what happened.

But I also didn’t want to come off as overbearing. I know she probably needed time and I also needed time to try to digest the situation. When she stepped out the door that night she took a piece of me with her and I was still trying to pick myself up from off the floor. I was hurt and I’m still hurt, I just wish she would have talked with me. Communicated how she was feeling so that we weren’t in this weird situation we are now in.

Noah overheard everything, his bedroom is right beside mine and after Y/N left that night he came out and asked me what happened. I wasn’t in the mood to talk and instead just walked past him and shut myself away in my room for the night. I hadn’t really come out the last few days unless it was to use the bathroom, get something to eat or drink, and then for the shower I took last night.

Admittedly I spent too much time sitting at my desk strumming away on my guitar in self pity and flipping my phone over to see if I had any missed texts or calls from Y/N, but instead was just left with the swallowing of disappointment.

With a heavy sigh I stepped up out of my office chair and set my wooden brown guitar back on its stand next to my red Ibanez. Before I could make my way back over to my bed to continue wallowing away in self reflection and the events from the other night that were stained into my sheets, there was a gentle knock at my door.

“Yo, Jesse, you decent?”

Noah.

I knew he was going to ask me about what happened between me and Y/N and I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep pushing it off. “You can come in.” I shifted my feet before finally settling in and plopping down onto the corner end of my bed.

The door opened and Noah’s head popped in through the crack, “you got a minute?” I nodded and gestured for him to fully come into the room and he made his way over to my desk to sit down into the black office chair. He ran his mandala tattooed hand through his hair and spun around to fully face me, planting both elbows down onto his knees and cupping his hands together to set his chin down upon them.

“You don’t have to tell me what happened, I think I got the gist of it. But I can’t just let you continue to sit in here. I know the feeling, I’ve done it way too many times before.” He paused, giving me a full once over, “At least you showered though, that's a plus.”

I smirked at his remark and rolled my eyes, “Oh fuck you man.”

Noah let out a chuckle and began to bite at the dead skin on the side of his lip, “Jesse, can I ask you a serious question, without you getting mad?”

I shifted a bit and then twiddled my thumbs together, already knowing what question he potentially was going to ask me, “Yeah, sure.”

“Did you sleep with her?”

He was now staring directly at me and the intensity of his glare weighed down like a ton of bricks. I let out a deep sigh that blew around the curl that was half falling into my line of sight, “No, we didn’t sleep together. Although, it was going in that direction.”

He still remained silent, just looking over while still studying me. “Things were getting pretty hot and heavy, we started making out and one thing led to another and before I knew it I was in between her legs…”

“Oh shit, so you went for a late night dessert trip?” Noah joked with a smile spread across his face.

“I fucking wish, I was right there man, I was so close. Right as I went to attend to business fucking JT called me.”

“Awh fuuuck, not the JT cock block.”

“Dude! You’re telling me! We’ve got these shows coming up this weekend and with all the work we’ve been doing with the new album I figured it was important and I just had this guilt that I needed to answer just in case something was fucked up, or I don’t know…”

“But I never should have answered that phone man, shit probably would have ended a lot differently.”

“Jesse, you can’t possibly know that. I probably would have done the same thing, we are just the type of people who are always work first. So consumed in the craft of it all and that’s just how our brains are hardwired man.”

Noah rolled the chair closer to the edge of the bed towards me and laid a hand on my shoulder, “You can’t let that shit eat you up man. I know you have hard feelings for this girl, but you’re my fucking brother and I hate seeing you beat yourself up like this.”

“I invited her to the show this weekend, Noah. All I’ve been thinking about is if she is even going to show now. I’m so afraid that if I get up on that stage I’m just going to be so concentrated on trying to see her out in the crowd or too worked up to give the performance that I wanna give.”

“Jesse, you are a fucking rockstar every time you get out there on that stage man. The shit you do, I could never even think of attempting. The power slides?! The spins off the risers?! I’d throw the fuck up.”

I cracked my knuckles and let out a small laugh, “You’ve got all that heavy screamy screamy this is Dethrone you fucks shit, though. Your crowd all seems to really love that.”

“Please come out on stage and do a, this is Dethrone you fucks! at the next Bad Omens show.”

“I’ll leave the Omens impersonations to Bryan and the rest of the other professionals.” I said while leaving a pat on Noah’s knee.

“That’s fair... Well, have you spoken with Y/N at all since the other night when all the shit went down?”

I placed my hand on the back of my neck, “I sent her a text shortly after she left asking her what happened. She read it but didn’t respond so I texted her again just asking her to please let me know she made it home safe.”

“Did she respond to that one?”

“Yeah, she did, and it was followed with an I’m sorry. I asked her if we could talk or if I could call her but I got left on read, again.” I let out a disappointed sigh and looked down at my feet.

“Hey man, like you said, maybe she just needs some time. She may just be busy with work or something. I know it’s easier said than done but try not to let it bother you too much. It’s obvious the girl holds some hard feelings for you as well, Jess. I’m sure she’ll come around.”

Noah stood up out of the chair and pushed it back in under my desk, “Now get your ass up. Michael and Jolly wanna go check out this new ramen place in town and I think Davis is gonna meet us out there.”

“New ramen place?” I asked while standing up off the bed and walking over to slip on my white adidas.

“Yeah, they just opened last week I think… It’s right across the street from the cafe.” Noah turned around to wink at me before making his way back out into the hallway.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and opened up the text messages between me and Y/N, the last one still being the one I had sent her asking if I could call. I bounced my fingers over the screen and bit at the side of my lip pondering if I should send her another text, maybe ask if she was still planning on coming this weekend.

But the feeling of disappointment from the potential of being left on read again, or even worse, her responding and telling me she wasn’t planning on coming anymore won the fight, and I instead exited out of our text conversation and clicked my phone screen off to slide it back into my pocket before meeting the rest of the guys downstairs.

As we made our way out of the front door my phone buzzed in my pocket and I eagerly grabbed it out, almost dropping it onto the sidewalk below me. But sighed out of frustration when it was just an email notification. How long was she going to avoid me? Why won’t she let me fix this?

#tomato red #jesse cash fic #jesse cash fanfiction #jesse cash x reader #jesse cash

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