#boy wanted to buy solid gold everything as soon as he got money

[oxydiane]

look me in the eyes. look me in the eyes and tell me harry james potter would not use the line “i like shiny things but i’d marry you with paper rings” and then get hit on the head for being too sappy. why the fuck is he even a seeker for if he doesn’t use this line at least once

[soldmysoultootomeboys]

Obey Me Brothers Wedding HCS

Just some wedding headcanons for the boys bcuz i’m soft for them, Gn MC

Thinks about marrying Asmo => 😡💕💕

Lucifer

I can not stress how much this man would be a bridezilla

He’s probably the MOST high maintenance demon when it comes to this, even over Asmo

He gets so stressed over it too and when he's stressed he gets extremely snippy

It takes you knocking a little sense into him to get him back on track

He just wants your day to be perfect and with his brothers causing trouble it's hard to really focus on choosing a tablecloth

He won’t be any nicer to his brothers but he will try to avoid causing fights at this time simply because it's really important to him that ALL of his family is there. 

The night after proposing you find a beautiful envelope on white paper with gold trim in your room you realize it's a congratulation note from the celestial realm, presumably from the big man upstairs, it's still a heartstopping realization when you realize who your father in law technically is

Are you committing a sin marrying a fallen angel? Do you care?

It’s easier to ignore it than do anything else, although you do appreciate them registering for the coffee maker you had on your registry. You needed that. Mammon broke the last one.

Kindly begs asks you NOT to do anything crazy in the week leading up to it

Please MC his heart he's about to explode from stress please don't add to it, just for one week

Diavolo plans his bachelor party at the Fall with Barbatos. Invites you along and you have to explain how bachelor parties work

If it’s up to him the wedding will be all black with red accents eDgY mUcH?

At the altar he kisses you twice, first to show everyone that your his, the second time is just for you two, he hides you away from sight curling his black wings around you and holding you as close as he can bear

In the end it's a very happy celebration filled with good food, family, and friends

When you cut the cake feel free to smash a little bit in his face, this is your only chance, he'll be in too much of a good mood to retaliate...much

Mammon

Luxury luxury luxury

He wants solid gold altars, diamond encrusted bouquets, jewels imported from every corner of the world

He has so many plans (as well as a ridiculously long wedding registry)

But the moment you say you want anything he abandons them 

Whatever you want he wants, but if you wanted some diamonds too that would be great

He absolutely would be down for a wedding bouncy castle

He gets you the biggest diamond ring ever that he buys with his own money from a lot of shifts at Hell's kitchen and modelling gigs

He totally believes in the tradition of not seeing you until your wedding day but he also forgets so he walks in and as soon as he realizes you're getting ready he shuts his eyes and tries to run out. He'll only talk to you from behind the door. 

When he sees you walking down the aisle he falls in love all over again. And he feels like that a hundred different moments. It doesn't matter what you're doing, playing with your veil, wiping cake off the corner of your mouth, yawning, he loves you and loves that you’re his.

He could get married to you in a ditch and still be the happiest man in the world.

He's an absolute goofball and is smiling the entire time

The couple that during their wedding night end up jumping on the bed and having pillow fights while play wrestling

Levi

You really want to marry a gross otaku like him??? Why??

Not that he's complaining! He just doesn't get it. His brothers are so cool and Asmo is so much prettier than him and he doesn't have anything to offer.

It takes a lot of reassuring to convince that this is what you want to do

You two have this same conversation about a million times before the wedding. He just doesn't get why you actually like him. Once it finally sets in that this really is happening and it's not just some big joke he gets really into it and definitely puffs up around his brothers to show off

His first thought is a cosplay wedding and he'll beg for it to be Ruri-chan themed

Good luck getting Lucifer or any of his brothers to agree to dressing up, as funny as it may be

If you shoot that down it's pretty easy to convince him to do something else since mostly he's just excited to be with you

He still has a little Ruri pin on his suit collar and cufflinks

When you walk down the aisle he feels like he’s going to faint from nerves and when it’s time for vows he pulls out a huge list of all the reasons he loves you and why your his Henry, although about half of it compares things you’ve done to things in TSL

He only makes it through a quarter of the way before he gets embarrassed

When he lifts your veil he panics because your so pretty and he can’t handle it

You have to initiate the kiss and when you do he turns as red as a tomato

He tries to play it off but keep a strong arm around his waist unless he really does decide to pass out

He cools down once you guys are at the reception and gets especially excited the little custom made toppers of you two in cartoon form

Satan

He's a bridezilla but in the lightest sense of the word

He won't get upset over mix ups or even really wedding stuff like Asmo or Lucifer but his temper will be extremely fine during this time, especially when it comes to his brothers.

Throws an entire table through the window when Lucifer asks him if he knew where Mammon was

It’s a lot of stress to create the perfect wedding and he buries his nose in different books that can help him

He’s a bit of a perfectionist

The most classic and elegant wedding ever and he’d want to be involved in every step of the way

Very interested in your opinion and if it compares to human weddings

He flushes with pride whenever you compliment something he picked out

Includes casual literary references in his wedding but only so people who really know will realize

Wears a navy suit 

Asmo

Also a bridezilla and a petty one at that

There will be drama, there will be tears, there will be a part where he cries off his mascara because Andrealphus of the damned brought the white bouquets and he wanted the PINK ones. This is HIS day why is she trying to ruin it.

It’s a lot of work trying to keep the damage to a minimal

Part of the reason he gets so upset is because this is your day too and he wants it to be perfect. 

Prepare for a million dress rehearsals.

He wants to help pick out your outfit and makeup! But he also doesn't want to break human tradition...But he wants to help pick out your outfit and makeup so bad!!

If he manages to restrain himself he picks out the makeup artist and the stylizer because he knows what makeup you like and what looks best on your skin.

Most likely tho he'll want to see anyways and bugs you to let him in

You compromise by going shopping with him as he tries on a million dresses and suits

MC the suit on the right or the one on the left?

They both look exactly the same.

"...Left love." "That's exactly what I was thinking. I knew I could trust you to pick out the right answer!"

Even though he's very good at fashion your opinion matters a lot to him. Sure he could make himself look perfect but he wants to look perfect for YOU. He wants to be your version of perfect and if that means he picks the high cut dress instead of the low cut which flatters his waist better then he'll do it. For you.

He's the type to want to have all the spotlight on him so if you're walking down the aisle he's going to do it too! He does it first. HE says for the attention. In reality he wants to be able to see you the moment you step out the doors and down that hall.

Looks super perfect as he waits for you at the aisle but the moment you get married he starts ugly crying. He throws his veil back on so no one can see it but you just lift it up and kiss away his tears.

Even though it's a lot of work it's worth it to be with the demon you love...but if you shove cake in his face he'll seriously kill you, MC do you know how long this took?!!!!! :'(

Beel

He’s more than happy to do whatever you want

Whatever vision you have he's willing to make happen

He does his best but feels a little useless since keeps having to break for snacks

Wonders why you’d want to be with him when all he ever does it eat but he tries not to bring it up in case it would upset you

He honestly does have a lot of fun planning with you and his favorite part was when you got to taste test different cakes because he got to impress you by explaining all the little differences between each one

He ends up being in charge of everything food related and it helps him feel a bit better

Barbatos ends up cooking the dishes 

During the rehearsal he falls in love with you all over again and doesn’t want to let you go the entire time

He gets especially nervous during the month of the wedding

He starts stress eating, going through even more food than normal, but then he gets worried about fitting into his suit and starts working out even more than normal, which makes him hungry again. It’s a terrible cycle

Belphie manages to break him out of it by reminding Beel that you love him more than anyone else

Even though its his wedding he starts setting up just to get out some of his nervous tension until the others shoo him back inside

A huge 20 layer cake each tier a different flavor

He has his own personal cake that's even bigger than the other cake but he’s more than willing to share with you

You two do the cute bit where you smash cake in each others faces

Beel still eats it tho

As much as he loves his family he's so happy to be able to steal you away at the end

Belphie

Planning a wedding is sooo much work

He lets you choose whatever you want as long as you let him sleep

if it was up to him he'd want a small informal celebration with his family but if you want something bigger than he guesses it's fine. As long as he doesn't have to talk to anyone like Diavolo 

He uninvites Lucifer like three times, each time using extremely formal paper with beautiful cursive that must have taken hours. When Lucifer confronts him Belphie just says that it’s too late because he already gave away his seat. 

He only brings him back when you make him

He sleeps more than usual in the weeks leading up to the wedding. You think it’s because of the stress but in actuality he’s trying to save up his sleep so he’s more awake for the ceremony

As much as he may act like he doesn’t care, he really does want to marry you and it makes him happy to think that you’re going to be all his

Beel is obviously his best man and while Belphie waits for you to come down the aisle he leans against him to take a small nap. Or that's what he had planned. The moment the music starts he perks up and finds himself unable to even close his eyes, too fixated on the doors about to open. 

Feeds you the first bite of cake and then just...doesn't stop

He’s so in love with you all he can do is stare

Gives his slice of cake to Beel he'd much rather pay attention to you than eat

However he does smash a little in your face but it’s out of love <3

[mustyrosewater]

𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙮𝙨 . . .

@leatherjacketmazzello​ requested what going clothes shopping with the pedro boys is like!

so lets go !! 

warnings : mentions of lingerie, mentions of sex.

javier pena : 

i’m not gonna lie to you, i kind of feel like javi wouldn’t be all that up to the idea of going clothes shopping with you at first. he has better things to do with his time rather than help you pick out clothes, that’s at least what he says until you casually mention you might be trying on some bra’s as well. 

our boy gets up very quickly and is already in the car by the time you grab your purse. the process of actually finding something to try on his boring for him at first; he has no idea how womens clothes work, this man only ever goes shopping if he has literally nothing else to wear or if his jeans are beyond repair. this along with the fact that he normally just picks a pair, gets the size and leaves. i don’t think the concept of actually trying on clothes before you buy them is actually in his brain. 

it’s not until you drag him along with you to the change rooms with a little white sundress with cute sunflower patterns all over it hung over your arm and tell him to wait while you try it. he ends up sat on a stool with his arms crossed as he impatiently waits for you. the ladies working at the change rooms have a little giggle and crack a few jokes with him while he waits.

it’s not until he hears the curtain draw back and lazily turns his head to you, only to nearly choke on his own saliva when he sees you grinning at him happily and do a little spin to show it off.

this man nearly gets a semi then and there. 

next thing you know javi is picking out several more things to try on, so much so that you need to remind him you still need to try on bra’s. 

he is very, very motivated to help you pick something out. 

francisco “catfish” morales : 

we know our boy is a sweetheart™ so even if he doesn’t have the best of idea of how shopping for women’s clothes works, you best believe he is going to happily drive with you to the mall to at least try and help. 

everytime you hold something up and ask him what he thinks he just holds his hands in his pockets and shrugs. it’s not that he doesn’t care, it’s just that to him everything looks beautiful on you so it doesn’t really matter. 

when you finally pick out a few items and bring him with you to the change rooms, you decide to just let him go in with you because we know he’s seen you naked countless times, neither of you really care at this point and there was nobody actually in the change rooms at the time so why not? 

he’s not really paying the m o s t attention because while he loves you, he’s only human, this man will check his phone every now and then. 

h o w e v e r, he looks up just in time to see you pulling on a pair of jean shorts and he’d be lying if watching you do a little shimmy while pulling them over the curse of your ass and turning in the mirror to check them out.

the moment you turn to him and asks him what he thinks his eyes are slightly widened and the man looks absolutely hypnotized. it’s not hard for you to realize that those jean shorts are most definitely a solid yes. 

shane “dio” morrisey : 

i feel like you and dio would get your clothes at pretty similar places, so whenever you want to go shopping it’s an invitation for him to come along and grab a few things for himself as well. this is despite the fact that literally every single time you two go shopping, it turns into dio taking you into practically every lingerie shop he can find and getting you to try things on for him. 

we’re not gonna sit here and act like you guys don’t shoplift ok, this man does not have a job, he is not paying for any of this. 

he’s usually more enthusiastic about picking things out for you, purely because he loves to see you try on things that he thinks would look good on you, lots of skirts and such. 

he wouldn’t force you to get something if you didn’t like it, but he’d definitely reassure you that if you change your mind he’s still putting it in his bag. 

i feel like he’d love to pick out chokers for you to try as well?

yes, you two go into a sexy shop, yes you come out with some very interesting purchases in terms of what some would consider ‘clothes.’ 

oberyn martell : 

well i mean, this man is a prince, if you even mention that you’re thinking about going down to the market to look for some more gowns, he can and will send you a plethora of new items. 

you told him you were fine with just going to the market and picking out a few simple things. did he listen? no. you know for a fact that some of these dresses come from the finest tailors in westeros.

at first you don’t want to accept it, it’s too much, but oberyn reassures you that you deserve them, and that only the most beautiful of gowns are allowed to grace your ethereal body. 

you know for a fact that he only wants you to try them on in front of him so that he can take them off of you, one of his favorites thing to do is know that you’re wearing something that he got for you, almost like he’s wrapping his own present in beautiful silks and embroidered velvet dresses. 

there was only one time the two of you actually went down to the market and every single time you tried something on he would shake his head slowly and tell you that whatever you were trying on was not worthy of your beauty and that you just need to let him order in dresses that are truly worthy enough of such a goddess. 

din djarin : 

ok look, our boy mando knows next to nothing about womens clothing, but armor? that our boy knows, he will absolutely take you to the markets and help you pick out armor that is worth the credits as well as making sure you aren’t paying more than it’s worth. 

i’m not gonna lie our boy would be absolutely hopeless at helping you go clothes shopping and thats ok, it’s not like he ever thought he would be doing that, he is a bounty hunter after all. 

there was only a single time that you were out looking for a bounty and came across a small market, curiosity getting the better of you, you went and had a look, thinking that maybe you could find something to bring back for the kid, a new toy or something. 

you didn’t mean to buy the dress, it was just the fact that as you picked it up, you could tell that din was staring at you intensely through his helmet, and part of you just knew he was imagining what you would look like in the dress.

of course it found it’s way into your bag all for the purpose of surprising him later on.

maxwell lord : 

the second that you mention your plans to go out shopping for a few new bits and pieces, maxwell is immediately standing up from his desk and informing his secretary that the two of you were going out. 

he gets the two of you in a car and next thing you know you’re pulling up outside of chanel, looking over at maxwell with furrowed brows. he just looks at you like it’s the most normal thing in the world to go to chanel for ‘bits and pieces.’

you try to assure him that he doesn’t have to take you here but he just brushes whatever protests you give off and takes you inside, unable to hide a chuckle when he see’s you looking around the store in awe, marveling at the chandelier and perfectly pressed white fluffy carpets. 

he tells you to start looking around and tells you to let him know if you see something you like. you look at him like he’s crazy but none the less begin to nervously walk around the store, tilting your head at the overdressed mannequins put into outfits that must cost more than your car and rent combined. 

as soon as you look at something for more than five seconds, maxwell asks if you like it or if you want to try it on. to be honest, shopping with maxwell is kind of a nightmare purely because you can’t help but feel like the workers will think this is some kind of sugar daddy relationship and that you’re just with maxwell for his money. maxwell assures you that they don’t get paid enough to care. 

max phillips : 

while max isn’t exactly loaded, we know he’s a frat boy that’s come from a trust fund family so he definitely isn’t middle class by any means. 

so expect that when you tell max that you’re thinking of going out to get some new clothes he takes you to ralph lauren of all places; this is a man who wears tailored suits and always has his rolex on, he is going to spoil you at least a little bit. 

even if you have concerns about people thinking you’re a gold digger, he assures you that he knows you love him and that’s the only opinion that you should really care about. 

and yes, when you get home he expects you to model everything he bought you, especially any and all expensive lingerie.

jack daniels a.k.a agent whiskey : 

when it comes to our southern boy, he has simple taste at heart. so when you say that you were thinking of getting some new clothes, he absolutely wants to go with you purely because he wants to help you as well as having the opportunity to shower you with compliments. 

he knows your taste extremely well and is very good at picking out things that he knows you’ll both really like. 

however, it doesn’t matter what you try on, because every single time without failure it’s going to result in you showing it to him for his opinion and in turn having him look you up and down, let out a low whistle and tell you that “well, you look as pretty as a peach, good enough to eat.” or some variation of his classic southern charm. 

at the end of the day he’s happy if you’re happy, he’s probably never going to get sick of shopping trips if it means it’s just an excuse to oogle at you and compliment you every five minutes. 

pero tovar : 

i think he’s more surprised than anything when you say you want to go to the market for something other than armor or weapons. he’s never seen you in anything other than armor or sleepwear so the idea of you wearing anything else is a completely new concept to him. he’s lying if he says he isn’t at least curious.

at first he’s a bit overwhelmed by the dresses that you’re looking at, especially when it comes to all the fancy words the sellers are saying. ‘embroidered’ ‘hand stitched’ he doesn’t know what they mean but he learns that they’re good things at least? he’s definitely not trying to remember the words so that if he ever wants to surprise you with anything he’ll know what to ask for. 

he almost freezes when you turn to him holding up a dress and asking him what he thinks, we all know that he doesn’t know enough to have a good opinion on the dress itself, and any opportunity to get you into something pretty is a yes for him, he simply shrugs and lets out a small grunt. 

he’s thankful for the market trip later on when he actually gets to see you in the dress later on, especially when he gets to tear it off of you. 

dave york : 

a majority of the time dave is far too busy to actually go shopping with you, but the second he gets some time off you are dragging that man to a store with you to pick out some clothes. he doesn’t necessarily have very interesting opinions of what you hold up from the rack, once again coming back to the whole idea of you looking gorgeous in whatever you wear. 

things do get interesting when you get to lingerie however, if he had ears, they would perk up at the mention of it. 

yes, he wants you to try things on. yes, if you like it he’ll be the one buying it for you because he wants to see you wearing lingerie he knows he paid for. 

also he absolutely tries to spew some bullshit he’s heard from chick flicks about how ‘that cardigan matches goes with your eye color.’ okay dave, you get an a for effort at least? 

[monomonomagines]

DR2 Boys as Monsters with a Human S/o Part 3

Wooh! I’m finally back writing and I had a ton of fun with this request if I’m entirely honest, especially since I had an idea on how to include Izuru as a fun bonus! I hope that you’ll all enjoy it as much as I did and expect for me to flesh out the lore with how Izuru and Hajime are tied together more in AO3 once we start uploding our more intricate Monster Au there! 

Part 3 (Part 1 here) (Part 2 here)

Fuyuhiko (Dragon)

Just as another day starts, it just as suddenly ends in the same manner with a few customers streaming into the bakery just before the day came to an end.

In the same manner, as you had grown accustomed to, entered the usual straggler that bought up all of your sweets that didn't sell, standing tall despite his small frame.

Approaching the glass and peering in like a child at the zoo, he still kept that same tough look on his face as he spoke up, his boyish voice giving an order more than a request.

"Give me everything you haven't sold today."

His eyes the hue of new spring growth with a goldish tint, don't bother to meet yours other than for that fleeting moment when they flick up to meet your gaze.

If you weren't used to him already, you would've assumed that he's quite a rude or shady guy but despite the fact that he always came bundled up in trenchcoat and other accessories to hide the shape of his figure he never caused even a stir in the bakery.

He always took your remaining sweets off of your hands at the very end of the night only to show up the next day and repeat the process.

Nodding you simply begin to carefully package the treats and begin to calculate the total while those same eyes from before followed your every move.

It was a bit funny to see such a tough-sounding guy always buying all of your sweets but you knew better than to voice that as you proceeded to relay the price of his goodies to him in the usual manner.

Like usual he pulled out some money from the pocket of his trenchcoat and places in your hands with his own gloved ones before telling you to, "Keep the change," and disappearing.

Normally you would leave around this time, that was what was typical but with your usual latecomer leaving you with nothing for the Holidays coming up you had no choice but to stay late to work on some fresh treats for the coming weekend.

It was going to be a long night, you thought as you got down to work.

After hours of baking and mixing and pouring you were going to call for a break when a strange golden light seeped in from the back window in the kitchen, piquing your curiosity.

The light seemed to be coming from the nearby forest, not too far but far enough behind all the greenery and trees that you had to draw closer to make out what it was.

There stood your usual latecomer, the straggler in the trenchcoat now shedding his disguise as he revealed his body to be covered in beautiful golden scales with a pair of wings and a tail to match.

You hadn't meant to stare, you knew it was none of your business what species your customers were but before you could attempt to turn back it seemed that he had caught onto your whereabouts.

Growling out in a way that made his sharp teeth visible even in the dead of night, he turns to you, his small form morphing into a much larger one as he reveals his true form to you.

"Don't scream!" He says, picking you up in his mouth with his discarded clothes as he lifts off into the sky.

As much as you wanted to scream, you could feel the fight leave your body as you were lifted off the ground and high into the sky.

This couldn't be happening! Your usual was a dragon, a literal gold dragon! There was no mistaking that this wasn't a dream with his gentle hold on you as you two flew but you didn't know if you wanted it to be real.

By the time this inner turmoil began to swirl about like a raging riptide it was already far too late. As suddenly as you had been lifted off the ground you were soon gently placed on it again, feelings your legs shake as they relished the feeling of solid ground to stand upon.

Now it was time for your captor to return to his previous humanesque form throwing on the trenchcoat once again, this time leaving it open enough for you to see his body underneath still.

Once you took it all in, he had placed you before a traditional-style Japanese house, the type you had only seen on rare occasions with its size when he spoke up, those same golden-green eyes gazing upon you.

"All right, I'll get down to business, how much do you want to keep your mouth shut?"

Huh? That's what he wanted to talk about, he wasn't going to kill you? To your obvious confusion, all he could do was smirk. It wasn't a playful kind of smirk though, let alone even a snarky one. The kind of expression he gave off felt dangerous as though he was trying to convey that refusing to comply would make it useless for him to have brought you this far.

"I'm not bribing you to be nice, Human. I know you've realized what I am and who I am, anyone would know by the scales that I'm the head of the Kuzuryuu Clan after all and as easy as it could be to kill you, I don't want to lose my source for my horde. Either, you accept my money or you disappear. Those are the only options you get!"

Despite his overly malicious sounding tone, his eyes bore into yours and for a moment you felt as you saw more than a dragon and Yakuza head threatening you.

In his eyes you saw a piece of who he really was, he was like a child begging you to have another cookie. He was vulnerable because of the simple knowledge that he liked sweets and even if you technically had no choice other than to allow him that, you wanted to.

In that moment your answer was clear, you'd allow him, the head of the Kuzuryuu clan to bribe you for your silence so that he could continue to indulge himself with your sweets.

That was what began your new-found "comradery" with Fuyuhiko. Now he was not only your usual latecomer in a trenchcoat, now he was the Golden Dragon that bought all your sweets and ate a portion of his spoils in the safety of your bakery after hours.

At least he was for months on end that is. However, after eating and talking with you over his sweets in the bakery so many times he seemed to be not as fond of the setting as he asked you to come with him to the same house he had taken you to before.

He had respected your wishes not to fly, saying something along the lines of that It's "not like he gives a damn" as he waited for your arrival.

As impatiently as ever, he wouldn't waste a moment once you did, dragging you off to a room to show you an impressive horde of all kinds of gems and gold and other treasures.

"So, you think this is my horde right?"

He asks with bated breathe as his eyes scan yours searching for something as though he knew there was something for him to find, but at your affirmation those same eyes seemed to soften as he let out a deep sigh.

"Well, you're fucking wrong! None of this is my horde, it's just for appearances for the clan. My real horde, my treasures...I actually wanted to share them with you but you have to swear not to tell anyone about this! You have to or else I really will kill you!"

He grumbles out, seeming more embarrassed than actually hostile as he waits for you to agree once more before pulling you into a hidden side room.

Upon first glance, it didn't seem to be anything special but as soon as your eyes focused in on the giant stash of sweets you knew. These were all the sweets that you had been baking lately, most of his leftovers from the nights he visited.

But why did he want to give a piece to you of all people? You knew you had gotten close and you did have feelings for him after getting to see the more intimate parts of him that you got glimpses of but if this was some kind of custom it surely was lost on you.

All you could manage to do was to thank him as he handed you a fried doughnut with some kind of childlike anticipation.

"What the fuck do you mean thank-" he stops to pinch the bridge of his nose, as though to cut himself off purposely before continuing-"You really don't know what this means do you?"

Reluctantly biting into the doughnut you nod again, waiting for him to explain, a light dusting of red coating his cheeks as much as the powdered sugar on your doughnut.

"It means, I...I want to be mates, you idiot."

Hajime (Alien)

Although you were planning on having a quiet evening in away from excitement, it seemed that the world had decided to ruin your plans by bringing the excitement directly to your doorstep.

It was well into the night, at least midnight if you were to approximate when you heard a deafening sound come from your backyard.

It sounded like a huge collision, possibly a horrible car crash or some other type of terrible event, an event the likes of which you didn't wish to get up to witness.

However, even though you had decided to attempt to remain under your covers where the world seemed so deceivingly warm, you were wrenched from your peaceful thoughts as a firm but polite knock at your back door assaulted your eardrums.

Ok, so maybe you were exaggerating but with this being your day off you really wanted to stay inside without anything concerning you, and someone needing your help after a crash was not in your plans in the slightest.

This was the right thing to do though, you told yourself as you approached the door and noticed the brunette on the other side with a worried expression etched across his features.

"Hello, I'm sorry for bothering you so late. I was hoping if I could stay the night here, I'm afraid I have no way to get home and I'm not really feeling too well after crash landing."

Maybe it was the sleep deprivation from staying up most of the night the day prior to your relaxation day or maybe it was that the words "crash landing" didn't register in that moment but before you could internally scream at yourself you were already allowing him into your home witnessing his odd appearance.

Well, he wasn't all that strange. He seemed to look just like an average guy other than the weird clothes and fuzzy antennae on the top of his head bouncing with every step he took.

"Thank you so much for allowing me to stay here. I was beginning to feel a bit sick after having to destroy what was last of my ship with the emergency protocol. It's probably just from the motions of crashing and all so if you don't mind I'll just need to lay down for a moment."

Despite his polite tone, he did seem a bit off-centered as he wobbled his way to your couch, laying down like it was some newfound sanctuary that he couldn't wait to reach.

Even if you wanted to say that this was normal, you knew at this point that something was up. Why was he dressed so weird, what was he going on about, and really what's with the antennae? Despite the number of questions beginning to multiply within your mind all you could manage to do in your tired stupor was to wobble over to him yourself, outstretching your hands to feel the fuzzy dancing receptors atop his spiky hair.

"W-what are you!?" seeming to contort his own face in confusion or even skepticism akin to your own he remarks, "So that's how you're feeling. You're apprehensive of me, right?"

Perhaps this would be the moment to respond or to even acknowledge the fact that he seems to have the power to understand what you feel once you're within a certain proximity of him. Perhaps you should have some deep revelation in this moment but with your lovely evening ruined by this interloper you decided instead to ignore any revelation, giving the fuzzy sensory appendages a hard tug to see if they'd come off.

"Ouch! S-stop that hurts!" He yells out into your head, his teeth gritted.

Huh? Did he just speak to you telepathically? Immediately understanding your mistake you unhand him, the realization that there's a real live alien laying on your couch finally sinking in.

"I didn't realize that you didn't understand the situation. Are you sure you don't need to lay down now? You seem more shaken up than I am." He replies sitting up to make eye contact with you.

As much as you wanted to agree, you now had even more questions overwhelming your very senses. You needed to know why and how he was here, immediately. Why did he show up tonight of all nights and here when it's supposed to be your day off!?

"I hadn't realized that I'd cause such a disturbance, although I guess I can't say I didn't consider it. I really don't have anywhere to go though so please allow me to stay here, even if it's just for a few! I'll learn to do whatever I have to earn my keep!"

He gives you a determined look as you gaze back shocked by the sudden proposal. He couldn't work but it's not like you wanted to turn him away. Guess this means that you got yourself an alien housewife or so the joke goes.

Allowing yourself a moment to breathe you accept his proposal, on the condition that he takes care of the house, dinner, and anything else around the place that was necessary to bettering it.

You knew it was probably a small feat for an alien compared to a human and with his quick approval you knew that you two would have a new exciting relationship blooming, even if it was just a symbiotic one.

Months have passed now since that day and despite your and Hajime's growing relationship, one thing never seemed to change.

Hajime rarely seemed to show much emotion unless he could get a reading off of you.

It was something that had started endearing but with him asking for your assistance in acting more human you had begun to wonder how to make it so that he would act more emotional without basing his feelings at the moment on others.

That's when an idea struck you! You would take him to a "Haunted House" you knew of. It wasn't exactly haunted as far as you knew but it's not like he'd know that and with a good scare you'd be sure to see his expression change even if just a bit.

What you anticipated didn't happen though as Hajime seemed spaced out the entire time you were there. Try as you might, it seemed that nothing changed that blank expression of his as you weaved intricate scary stories, claimed to see things not there, and even asked him if he "heard that sound" repeatedly.

Just what was he so focused on anyway!? You cursed to yourself when a warmth on your hand snapped you out of those thoughts.

"S/o?" he asks, his hands on your own as his forest colored orbs peer back at you, "Is this like what the human couples do? At home, I've witnessed enough TV to presume that you did this in order to court me in accordance with your established feelings for me. Am I right about that?"

Oh, right he can read your emotions and all. How didn't you think of him knowing all this time?

Taking your silence as an affirmation, he gently smiles at you catching you off guard with this rare expression and the words that had joined it. "I...I know it may be a bit sudden, but I do feel the same. I know I'm simply supposed to be earning my keep but would you allow me to be your boyfriend as you put it?"

Izuru (???)

After your strange rendezvous with Hajime in the "Haunted House," you took him to, you imagined that all would be normal or at least the state of normalcy you were used to with your new alien boyfriend.

However, something seemed off since you two had returned. Hajime had begun to space out often, seeming to move around without any recollection of what had just happened.

It was of course worrying but it wasn't like you could do take him to a doctor when he was an alien. You were left with little to no options other than to wait for it to pass if it would and to try to support him no matter what.

As this process continued with Hajime's face going blank and his body moving without his knowledge you only grew more fearful.

Now even when you tried to sleep beside him you'd end up tossing and turning or waking up every few hours out of fear that you'd lose him.

One night in particular though, he wasn't in bed with you when you had woken up. Perhaps it had been because of the raging storm that your ears picked up as soon as you had awoken or that he had to use the bathroom but at the same time you just knew that couldn't be it.

Something had to be amiss with how he's been acting, you couldn't think of anything else even if you had nothing to back up your thoughts.

Feeling the adrenaline shoot through your body you tore your way downstairs to see his silhouette in the kitchen looking out of the window at the pouring rain, only snapping around to look at you when you called out his name.

"So, you've awoken." He remarks, sounding more deadpan than ever before as his eyes gaze upon you, those same forest green orbs seeming cold and analytical as though there wasn't an ounce of life left behind them.

This wasn't Hajime, this was something else, you thought as whatever was before you tilted its head.

"You are right," you heard within your own head. "I'm able to access his powers though meaning that we can speak like this."

Taking in his form, illuminated by a flash of lightening you noticed how he floated a mere inch or two off the ground as he continued to stare through you with that expressionless face.

"I can tell you're scared of me but I don't mean any harm. Do you remember that "Haunted" house you took Hajime to?"

How did he know about that? As much as your thoughts swam about in your head, he seemed to be calm as ever simply floating closer to you.

"I'm surprised you're not getting this already," he sighs still inside your mind causing you to shiver from the strange sensation as he continues, "I'm a ghost, I died out long ago but I stopped being human long before that. I was the product of an experiment, an alien experiment so I thought that possessing the very same thing that stole my humanity would be interesting."

Drawing closer, his gaze bores into you, feeling an icy breath as his lips rest just an inch or so away from yours unmoving as he finishes his previous speech.

"But, like with everything else in this world I'm still so bored."

As soon as it seemed like he would possibly kiss you the body of your boyfriend fell into you still deep asleep as though he had never stirred in the first place.

You were lucky you could catch him but you knew you'd need to tell him about what happened.

As you dragged the two of you back to bed, trying to muffle the memory of that horrifying event and the onslaught of rain you felt a single name roll off your lips before you fell into a deep slumber.

"Izuru Kamakura."

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Della Arc Finale and Shadow Into Light  Combo: The Shadow War! or The Last Stand of Lena DeSpell (For at least a year)

Hello all you happy people! And today the two arcs of Ducktales i’ve been covering unite for the season 1 finale! It’s been a hell of a ride: We’ve had a family reborn, gay subtext, a warriors homage, an underground adventure, a vacation with the gods, gay subtext, a giant shark made of money, a trip to old Scotland for some family fun shouting, gay subtext, a trip into Lena’s innermost nightmares that also involved a sasquatch for some reason, a heart stopping reveal, a heartbreaking argument due to said reveal and gay subtext. It’s been a hell of a ride and while the Lena train will go on, I feel both acomplished and happy to have finished up the Della arc in such a short time. Never doing that again mind, as it took up my entire schedule and pushed any other ongoing projects out, but i’m still proud to have pulled it off. 

When we last left off.. yesterday, The truth came out, the boys lashed out at Scrooge, Scrooge lashed out at everyone, and we all cried. Now Magica looms, our family is broken again and it’s up to two unlikely people to bring them together again. So join me under the cut for some parent trapping, some adventure and even more Weblena subtext than usual, as we enter the Shadow War.

Part One: Night of De Spell! 

I”ve come around on the episodes being treated as two parts in reuruns and on Disney +. They were BUILT to be chunked up later as there are clear breaks between episodes, said chunking is to make reruns on tv easier.. and it makes my job easier as it gives me clear act breaks. I’ll still cover them all in one article, but it makes it easier to recap it when I have two clearly defined acts, something that’s been a struggle when reviewing episodes that just aired like Let’s Get Dangerous! and the Last Adventure!, hence why I switched to breaking down the episode instead for the latter. So I really can’t gripe about something that dosen’t really affect anything negatively, at most it just adds credits to both episodes, and HELPS me a lot. 

And it really helps with this one as like most of the episodes for the Della arc... the first half of the finale is two plots that don’t really intersect that much aside from Magica mimicking Scrooge on the phone to keep him from going to the dinner. Other than that they don’t really impact each other until the end of the first part. So i’ll be covering both plots separately, and then just the episode as a whole for part two. 

Good. Let’s get quackin. 

Everyone But Scrooge and Lena in Parent Trapped:

It’s three days after the end of the last episode and everything still sucks: Webby is desperate to try and get her family back but none of them are hearing it and Dewey and Huey are taking it an extra mile and throwing their mementos from their adventures in the bay. Louie however dosen’t want to and it’s the one bit of an otherwise great episode that does not work for me as he’s not keeping it for sentiment: it’s a solid gold Kopesh. As someone who makes about 30 bucks a month and gladly sells stuff he doesn’t need, this annoys me on a fundamental level. Sell the damn thing and buy yourselves some food or some ninja turtles dvds like me. 

So Webby is worried they might leave soon and she’ll be back to almost no one but Launchpad assures her they aren’t going anywhere.. right as Donald, desperate to help the boys cheer up and relating to what their feeling, offers to take them where they always wanted to go: Cape Suzette! Spin it!

The Sea Ducks’ even on the flier. Baloo was a legend.. I hope he enjoys his retirment on Cocaine Island as Secretary of Goodtimes under President Snowflame. So our dynamic duo spiral into panic at the thought of loosing their family and best friend respectively. 

Webby: Someone’s gotta remain calm here Launchpad: So you? Even Launchpad knows he isn’t the adult in the situation between him and an 11 year old girl. So they come up with a plan. It’s time to parent trap those sons of bitches. They’ll host a heartwarming dinner reminding them of all the good times, invite Scrooge as the suprise guest and then spring the parent trap. Probably also sing Let’s Get Together given the two people we’re dealing with and given Beakley’s age she likely showed Webby both. Sidenote... I really wish we’d seen more of these two. It’s a team up we only got this once but both Webby and Launchpad being friendly weirdos with a lot of heart but not a lot of common sense made them the dream team and make this part of the plot hilarious and help lighten the mood given the heavy stakes. 

So later that day, we cut to Huey and Lewey who are looking into Cape Suzette.. and find themselves not as excited anymore. They wanted to go all their lives.. but it’s clear that traveling the world.. it’s just another port town, not much more or less adventuerous than Duckburg, and was likely only appealing because it wasn’t here. They’ve flown higher now, seen more and while they won’t admit it... they probably really DON’T want to leave Scrooge forever. it sounded good a few hours ago, it sounded great 6 months ago but now.. it’s just not the same. Dewey is all for it.. but that’s because Dewey was the one who took everything the worst. He put all this effort into finding his mom, into this whole big hunt... and also put all his faith and love and future into scrooge, so having that all puleld out from under him without the maturity to get that he lost a lot too, combined with his natural stubborness, has lead him to dig in. But before hec an convince the other Webby and Launchpad slip them the invitation. The boys accept, probably because with a child’s handwriting it could only be either Webby or Launchpad.. Donald set out traps for Doofus after the last time. 

So they take over the kitchen with Donald confused and upset and then just grumpy after.. they explain their making a farewell dinner. And one of them is his friend. And the other one is his boys surrogate sister. And their offering to make him free dinner and brought all the fixings when he’s out of a job

So naturally their attempt at a parent trap is about as subtle as a Killdozer through your living room, with Webby having made replicas of all their adventures out of food. Launchpad provided drinks.. that are melted popscilces (”There’s a riddle on the stick”). God bless you thoughtly dumb thoroughly beautiful man. So naturally this really isn’t working at all, not helped by Scrooge not showing up thanks to Magica, and Beakley showing up because Webby made the crucial mistake of thinking Launchpad could think bout anything but Darkwing Duck, Planes or a Darkwing Duck Shaped planes clearly so he gave her an invitation telling her NOT to come. 

Webby’s attempt to get them to remember Scrooge fondly gets no-sold, though in a very touching way as Dewey, clearly sensing what she’s trying to do instead picks Uncle Donald, with Huey, Louie and Launchpad all joining in saying he’s Loyal (Dewey, who also uses it as a jab at scrooge because he’s being a little shit this episode, and not in his usual fun way or Louie’s usual fun way), Thoughtful (Huey), Passionate (Louie) and that he likes his sailor suit (Launchpad). It brings the duck to tears and as a big fan of Donald, I love this a lot and it shows that, even if Dewey is doing it to take a jab at his uncle, they really do love and apricate their uncle and all he did despite perferring scrooge for the last 6 months. They may love their rich uncle.. but Donald’s there Dad and nothing can take that away from him.. not that a lack of an emphasis on  his role as their adopted dad in season 3 didn’t try. They love him and wether they realized that because of what happened with Scrooge or always felt this way and just never expressed it, i’ts sweet. For the record I feel while they loved him it took till this for Dewey and Louie to appricate him while Huey, being a sweetheart and the most like him out of the three, always did. Launchpad attempts to use a bouncy castle to fix things for some reason.. the inner machinations of his mind are an enigma.... or just this on a loop. 

You make the call. Beakley naturally, being a spy with decades of experince and someone with half a brainn, figured out their parent trapping them.. but to the suprise of both and the audience she agrees. The family’s been apart too long and she’s fully on board with keeping it together. It makes sense both just in the context of season one and with the reveal of the finale. For the former, she’s watched Scrooge be miserable and withdraw for a decade, and was the one who acitvely encouraged him to spend time with the boys. Sure she wasn’t happy about them moving in, but that settled quickly and last episode she was every bit as worried about the boys as she was her own daughter. She WANTS her best friend to be happy and knows he and his family are stubborn as hell, and knows that our dream team’s heart is in the right place.. but they have about a third of a brain cell between them when it comes to social situations. The finale just adds to it by not wanting Webby to loose her dad or the rest of her family because her dad’s being an idiot. And as a third I just thought of, now we know Beakley’s only ever had one family member before joining the McDuck family, she likely wishes she’d had one and dosen’t want Scrooge to loose that.  It’s also a VERY touching moment: Webby forgave Scrooge easily out of desperation, Launchpad did because he’s nice.. but Beakley while justifably pissed at the time and pulling Webby out of there til lhe stopped being a shithead, given the “your not family” comment, despite having EVERY reason to shun him too.. she gets that right now her best friend needs her to keep his family from running off. 

She also wins easily, making a pie that scrooge liked and taking it away saying they don’t want a reminder of that “awful man”.. before giving them Scrooge’s side of the story, if through double negatives Launchpad dosen’t get. She points out he spent nearly all his money, that their mother was her own woman who made the decision, and that Scrooge spent TEN YEARS looking for her, the entirety of her lives and only stopped because he was on the brink of loosing everything. That starts to turn the boys minus Dewey, but the killing stroke is her pointing out a very simple fact: he lost someone too and all their doing is cutting out their family and costing him more people for something that wasn’t ENTIRELY his fault and he spent a decade trying desperatly to fix. 

This gets Donald, whose the first to say they should go home. “This family has been apart too long.” To me, while I wish the show had built it up more.. i’ts Donald realizing how WRONG he was. He shunned his uncle and while he was right to be mad.. Scrooge did everything he could to fix things, and not trying to reconcile cost him a decade with the only family he has left that he cared about. Cost the boys their uncle and is NEVER what his sister would’ve wanted. And now he’s enabling the boys to make the same mistake he did, his own anger in the past making them think their resitment and shunning is okay when it’s not helping anyone. All he’s done is hurt someone he loves, someone who is easily his second father and teach his boys to do the same. That has to stop. It’s a great bit of character. 

Huey and Louie are natually easily convinced while Dewey refuses to at first and cries.. before joining in, letting go of his anger too forced to finally realize the truth, or at least what I feel it is: He attacked scrooge because he didn’t want to admit his mom wasn’t perfect, that after all this time he found out she DID do something bad, if not villiaonous, by leaving them and taking the rocket before it was ready, something reckless and selfish, and admitting Scrogoe wasn’t the only one responsible.. was admitting she left him. He finally lets go... just in time for a giant eruption of purple from the mansion. Wuh-oh.. as for why let’s go back a few hours. Boys?

Scrooge and Lena in Night of De Spell!

So a few hours ago Magica is still using Lena’s body, to the point that when Lena is able to force her out for a second she genuinely FORGOT she was there. That’s horrifying..nothing to add there that entire sentence was just really fucking terrifying. 

So naturally she plans to use Lena’s body to get back to the mansion only to find out the kids left from Launchpad (this is before he entered the other plot), but gets in anyway by manipulating him by faking that webby said something about him being weak. 

That being said.. he is in a VERY bad place, beginning the series running gag of characters eating nothing but Pizza and having pizza boxes everywhere as a sign of depression, as the mansion is littered with it despite, as mentioned before everyone only having been gone three days. He’s not even wearing his robe, instead wearing a dirty undershirt and rolling around. He’s so horribly depressed and miserable.  Magica being kind of nuts can’t fathom why he’s miserable and keeps trying to make him Tea.. which leads to something like this for about 7 minutes. 

Granted i’ts more by accident he avoids  Magica poisoning him but still. Also before we move on I have to give props for the animation here and Kimiko Glenn’s performance. She plays Magica perfectly (as Magica only uses her own voice when not around scrooge), and the animation shows off the diffrence between owners of the body incredibly well.

Eventually Magica realizes he’s not faking it and dosen’t want an easy win. She’s waited a decade and a half for this she wants at least some fight. So she manipulates him, talking about family (Not that sh’es a good family member but we’ll get tot hat), and how it weighs you down.. likely also beliving given what we know about her backstory, that he belivies that. That what he said to poe back then was accurate, not realizing.. he changed. 

So he decides to go back to baiss and get rid of everything.. except the dime and Magica being too eager for it gives the game away, so she simply bites him and takes it and... frees herself with the power of the eclipse. After 15 years Magica is free, at full power and quickly imprisons our heroes. 

Scrooge naturally tears into Lena before blaming his family for it.. before she shuts him up, pointing out that Magica got in here BECAUSE his family was gone. Had Webby been here she would’ve realized something was off and stopped her, as would the rest of the family. With no one left to watch his back and his insincts dulled by misery, he was an easy target. She WISHES she had his family. She realized too late that what she wanted wasn’t freedom.. it was somewhere to belong, somewhere where she’s loved and people care about her. Actual parents or parental figures, a warm bed, and a place where no matter how much you argue your welcome at the end of the day. To have a home. Scrooge takes both things in and thanks her for making him realize he was a moron, she was right.. and that if she helps him get out of this.. she has a place in said family.  Naturallly though given this is only part one their beaten easily once they escape: Magica turns Lena back into her shadow, more on that in a minute and traps Scrooge in the dime, and so part 1 ends with Magica ascending at full power and Donald giving the natural response “Aw Phooey”. Time for an intermission...

Part 2: Day of the Ducks!

So we pick up where we left off.. with Magica’s manical laughter and Dewey wondering.. who the hell is this? Webby fills him: Ancient sorceress,  mortal enemy of scrooge usual stuff between them. Except in this version she’s leagues more powerful. She’s also voiced by Comedic Actress and Former Doctor Who Star Cathrine Tate who I haven’t complimented enough int he roll but will now. She easily rolls between comedic and thretaning in an instant and was perfect casting, able to be delightfully hammy.. and unspeakably vile and abusive. 

Back to the plot Magica proceeds to make things worse by moving her base from the Mansion to the bin... and summoning ALL the shadows of the citizens of duckburg. We also get a few neat scenes as a result: Glomgold tries to force his to stay but gets dropped in the bay.. and suprisingly is not a throaway gag but a gag that leads to the setup of his plot next season and the introduction of Kev, who comissioned this episode,’s faviorite character. More on that someday. Fenton does some stargazing.. and naturally when his turns into an evil shadow ghost tries to summon his armor.. and instead his shadow steals it. 

Finally Gladstone’s... gives him 20 dollars because of course it does. All nice littlle nods and in fentons’ case setup for later. 

So while Magica begins her gloating, she had a long speech prepared, our heroes back at the boat try to come up with a plan. They do end up getting unexpected reinforcements: Gyro, Manny, and Little Bulb all show up as their shadows emerging destroyed the glass in the underwater lab. “That’s it no more underwater labs! it’s volcano’s and abandoned castles from now on!”. Well the last one worked for the Mads for a while. i’d of gone for it. Though fair play while they do keep Gyro’s cool underwater lab next time we see it and the windows break security shutters activate to prevent another flooding. Likely Scrooge wouldn’t pay to move the whole thing i’m betting. Fenton also shows up so with most of the supporting cast at this point in the show present, they can begin the raid. 

Donald does try to squak out a plan.. but it’s here an intresting idea of the series pops up: No one can understand donald. Well some people can, but not everyone can and even the boys mostly take it from context.. or at least Dewey does. This causes Donald to angrily chase Dewey around

So Gyro, not having the time for any of this, shoves a thing in his mouth, phrasing. This is the Barksian Modulator, a nod to Carl Barks and how Donald could speak in the comics and thus gives him a Don Cheadle voice.. wait.. does this mean comics Donald is voiced by War Machine too? I’ll table that. The point is he can speak clearly and in the sliky tones of Don Cheadle. Not as sexy as Keith David but i’ll take it. I also appricate Cheadle being fully game for this, doing a silly promo video about his roll here, likely taking a bit of a pay cut to do voice acting, and even doing donald’s trademark untitllegble raises. I do WISH donald got to give his badass speach in his own voice as Anselmo would nail it, but he got plenty of good performances before and after this and the gag of having an academy a golden globe and sag award winning actor with tons of charsima as Donald’s intelligble voice was too good to pass up. He even gives out an ah phooey! Such a legend. 

So he gives a big inspirisng speech and a new motto of “Ducks never back down” that Dewey uses afterwords to diminishing returns. Andddd has the kids stay on the dock for their saftey SEEMINGLY having leanred nothing. Seemingly being the key word. Just to jump ahead a bit his assault team of him and the other adults goes decently: They are overwhelmed, but Fenton is able to improvise a ray gun, and then uses little bulb to turbocharge it. It’s awesome and shows the guys got talent with or without the suit. Beakley keeps the boat safe as she can (and gets as frustrated as donald, which is great, showing i’ts not so easy is it?)< and Gyro gets captured and is disapointed when he tells magica he’s only an aquantince when asked instead of a friend, though let’s be fair here... Scrooge REALLY does value gyro and did not want him to die. Are they friends... eh I dunno, but I do think he’s more than aquantince. Gyro also deserved it after putting Manny and LIl Bulb up against each other for the job. That will teach you to try and unemploy keith david! Launchpad also gets the awesome task of crashing into the bin as a distraction, though Magica keeps tossing him back, which at least does the job... he also gets a TRULY magnificent moment where he leaps onto the plane, singing his own version of the darkwing duck theme song. Fucking amazing and a shame they never called back to this at any point once Darkwing was introduced. I’d pay money to see them both do that. 

So meanwhile with the kids, they naturally say nerp to staying behind. But they need someone who could help them bring them in. In Webby’s actual words, which I am not paraphrasing nor manipulating “Like a noble teen ne'er-do-well who can break into anything, including your heart?” And just in case you think i’m reading too much into things this is her face after saying that. 

That my friend is a face that just SCREAMS 

There’s no straight explination for this face or this line, and for anyone whose going to bring up the sisters thing in the finale 1. Sisterhood is complicated and sometimes not literal and 2. she was trying to keep Webby from walking into what she thought, correctly, was a trap. I’m doing this NOW because I forgot to in the review, and want to make it painfully clear i’ts okay to ship them as long as you don’t do sex stuff. Their chlidren. It’s gross. Don’t. It is precious. 

So they head to Lena’s and find the place deserted and kinda messed up.. and find her Journal which reveals her secret origin: 15 years ago, though her age is not exact and even frank’s said that and while we do see her fully formed as a teen, that might of been an artistic thing we don’t know. Point is 15 years ago Lena was born when Scrooge sealed Magica’s phsyical form away in a dime during their final battle on Mt. Vesuvius, her base in the comics and original series, so she constructed Lena out of her shadow to act as her minon. 

Webby of course is heartbroken, feeling Lena used her and all that bad stuff, though the boys comfort her, saying she’s still got them.. not getting the diffrence between familial love and romantic love but point is they know how Magica got out and what she did with scrooge, but they still need to get inside.

Huey, I think, Gets an idea and they swim underwater to emerge from Gyro’s flooded lab. Louie also gets his Kopesh back. 

Naturally though their own shadows go after them but Dewey cleverly disapates them: since their shadows they need light to exist, and a simple hit of the fuse box disapates them. Presumibly since Magica was forced to make Lena into a more indepdnent and unique being, she’s immune to this hence why this has only happened to magica’s shadow before.

So they continue making their way up, facing Louie’s old nemisis THE STAIRS in a whopper call back.. only to find the bulk of the shadows, inclduing ShadowdGizmoDuck, waiting.. only for Donald to show up just in the nick of time. Turns out het PLANNED for all of this: he knew they wouldn’t stay put if he told them to and would find their own way in, thus allowing his force to be the bait. Fucking brilliant. 

So our heroes head inside while Donald takes on an army single handed.. if with his modulator bugging out.. and given he and Beakely enter the bin via the office entrance later, he BEAT THE GIZMODUCK ARMOR. If you needed proof donald is a legend, there you go. Goodnight.

Anyways our heroes head inside, and when asked what they do, Dewey manages to give his own badass line “Do what we do best make trouble”. What follows is an awesometastic final fight with every one of the kids using their own talents against Magica in one epic clash. Huey simply asks the questions he has while dodging Magica, throwing her off ballance, and nearly getting her weakness out of her. Louie uses his faster speed at burrowing in the gold to easily dodge her and to get her to break a mirror and claims it was a curse. While she dosen’t buy it he eventually uses his silver tounge to wear her down... and leave her open for a kick to the ribs. “Ow my ribs”. Magica drops the dime and it’s clear our first two boys were just the warmup. This is the headliner and she is pissed, coming at Magica with everything. While we’d seen how badass Webby was all season.. this is her crowning glory. The moment that shows she’s not just the best of the kids she EQUALS Donald and Della in martial combat, if not in experince and easily keeps the pace with Magica, railing at her for taking her family and her friend away. Magica tries gaslighting her by saying Lena wasn’t real.. only for lena to come back. 

In one glorious moment, Lena shows off how far she’s come, defying Magica at FULL power to return and fight back, keeping her off webby and giving Dewey, who magica kept from getting the dime seconds earlier, heads for the dime. She’s gone from going with her aunt for her own selfish reasons.. to fighting her with everythig she has left knowing she won’t surivive.. and Webby gets proof that Lena really did love her. Wether she tricked her or not.. she loved her.. and sadly enough to die for her as Magica, after telling Lena “your not family” after Lena calls her aunt, seemingly destroys her and a furious webby attacks in grief and rage. The “your not family part” also gives horrifying context to magica’s abuse: she likely abused Lena.. because Lena wanted family.. and Magica just wanted a minion.. and now we know her backstory.. she already LOST the only family she thought she had and hardenred herself, refusing to loose anyone again and thus took it out on an innocent child like the heartless monster she is. 

However while Lena’s temporary death didn’t stop Magica.. it gave Dewey a dewstraction and he got the dime back. He tearfully apologizes to Scrooge.. before having to run again, but both have genuinely and finallyr econclied, putting away their own anger and pride and hurt and restoring the family good. Dewey uses the dime to block as Magica corners him.. and that desepration move frees Scrooge. We then get another hell of a fight as Scrooge easily counters her, uses his cane as a sword.. and THANKS HER. As far as he knew without her he’d of lost his family..w ith her , and with Lena, he found the strength to welcome them back in and they came for him when he needed them. This , given the Poe thing, infuraties her MORE, though this time she deserves him making her feel bad and using his douchebaggery against her, and he disarms her of her staff, which breaks on Donald’s head. Magica is dewpowered without her staff and without her amulet which was absorbed into Lena. Laucnhpad also gets a moment by bodyslamming her from the plane. She escapes, why they don’t go after her I have no fucking clue seriously guys what, but the point is for today our heroes have won. The bin, mansion and most of the city may be damaged.. but the family is whole again, cemented by scrooge callign out his nephews names (Minus dewey.. but intetoinally this time) and saying “Curse me kilts i’ve missed you”. After years of pain, hurt and sorrow..the family is whole once more and as they enjoy a midnight swim together, the future is all ahead of them. 

But there’s only one thing.. or rather one person missing. And as we close out the episode and the season we cut to the moon.. where Della is watching a newscast.. and sees her boys for the first time. And we hear her for the first time. SEQUEL HOOK BITCHES. 

Final Thoughts on The Shadow War!:

Shadow War is an EXCELLENT capper to the season and both it’s arc, tying both together beautifully by having Scrooge’s misery over his family leaving him vunerable to Magica. Any complaints I can muster are minor nitpicks, it ties in everything that had happened up to this point into a neat bow while leaving two big sequel hooks for next season for each arc. Though it’d take their sweet time, and some weird rescheduling from Disney ,  to get to the Lena one. It’s heartfelt, satisfying and awesome in every measure and is only the weakest of the three finales because the other two had even more shit to work in after seasons of hard work building up this world, with larger stakes and what not.  It also has great symmetry with Woo-ooo and had the series ended here, and taken out the stinger.. it would’ve been decently satisfying. Thankfully it didn’t and we got two more knockout seasons after this and a whole other arc to cover at some point.  It’s still utterly fantastic and still worth your time. Now for something new as this is the first story arc for a series i’ve finished, and as such ...

Final Thoughts on The Della Arc:  I”ll get to the Lena arc, both for this season and as a whole, once I finish this retrospective. But for now how does the Della Arc hold up after all this time? Decently. It does have i’ts problems: The pacing is pretty bad: the arc is staggered out fairly but the size of it’s mystery coupled with the lack of any real info about Della for the entire goddamn season when this is her first big roll in anything, is annoying and will never not be even though we now have all the answers. 

So while i’ts not perfect.. it’s still pretty damn good. They took one of Disney’s greatest lingering questions that went purposfully unanswered.. and answered it.. turning it into a masterful series of character pieces and using it to drive Dewey as a character. This was his arc and it shows depth to him: in most episodes he’s mostly pluck and adhd, but the arc shows off the hole left by not knowing his mom, his determination.. but also his selfishness and stubborness. It really fleshes the kid out and makes you root for him even when he’s fucking up a lot. The character work with EVERYONE, from Dewey in general to Webby and Donald in Ithaquack, to the other boys on the sunchaser to Scrooge in the last two/three eps, to Beakly in the same.. ther’es just lots of great stuff in this arc and way too many great moments to dismiss it. The pacing may of been shot, we may not have learned mcuh about della.. btu sometimes adventure is about the journey not the destination, and the journey AND where it took us were both phenominal so yeah. It’s a good arc. Not the series best, but a good start. 

As for the Lena Arc i’m saving my throughts on that till we finish it as unlike this arc, which leads into the next but isn’t 100% connected to it, her arc extends for the rest of the series character wise, story wise and weblena wise. So we’re not done with this retrospective and i’ll save my thoughts for when we get to season 3. But Covering the della arc was a lot of fun, exausting but fun, and again any future arcs that aren’t paid for will be staggered out and any interlocking arcs that are paid for will have both paid for. Now with that out of the way..

NEXT TIME ON SHADOW INTO LIGHT: Lena gets SO JEALOUS as Webby makes a new friend and everyone gets a new faviorite as Violet is introduced! Meanwhile Beakley is desperate to prove to her 11 year old grandaughter she has friends and decides to befriend launchpad. Shenanigans insue. See you next week!

Next Time on this blog: It’s back to Amphibia! It’s time for some Zelda action as our heroes go to the first temple. I’m expecting either a giant spider or a shadowy ghost version of andrias. Don’t let me down show!

Until then, stay safe, follow me on patreon and on this blog and i’ll see you at the next rainbow. 

[misterewrites]

The Heart of Civilization (Welcome to the Underground!)

Summary: Abigail's first experience of the Underground's capital is nothing like anything she's dealt with before but luckily she's got two guides. While the group decides how to handle their current arrangement, Oliver comes up with a surprising solution.

Hello everyone! It's done! I'm no longer behind schedule! E HERE WITH THE NEXT CHAPTER OF THE UNDERGROUND! WOO! Sorry it's been a chaotic, long few weeks. But I hope you are all doing good. So here we go the first major arc of the underground. Enjoy! I hope you are all safe, washing your hands, wearing your masks, get the vaccine if you can and keep each other safe! Comment, reblog, tell your friends. All that is super helpful for me and I love feedback. That's it for me, have a great week! E is out! Gonna nap!

Read this chapter or the whole thing if you’re curious with the link found below

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27814297/chapters/77710460

Cities were never silent. It was impossible to be given how much life was concentrated in a single location. Even smaller towns and villages in the middle of nowhere were always bursting with the sounds of the living: Cheery drunks, clanking armor of the city guard patrolling, the odd night owls who could never find rest under a starry sky. The life and soul of any place were the people.

So naturally Abigail was taken aback by the immense silence.

She knew there was sound given how sudden she was buffeted backwards by a wave of unseen force. Archie and Oliver felt it too given how their bodies jerked but unlike her, they had been expecting it.

There was a strange disconnect between Abigail’s senses and her brain as it tried to piece together what exactly was going on. She was actually starting to get a headache as her mind tried to make sense of conflicting information.

Her eyes watered and burned at the soft light that emitted throughout. It wasn’t as warm or bright as sunlight but it was close enough to make Abigail feel stuffy in her thick riding cloak. Oliver took off his cloak and began helping Archie out of his so Abigail followed suit, putting it away carefully in her backpack.

She asked how was there light down here but her words were muted and felt strange leaving her mouth like she was simply mouthing her question to herself.

It should’ve been noisy given that there were dozens of people on the stony street: children of various races running about playing different games among themselves, adults huddled together their faces serious with concern or relaxed at ease yet all were muted with a quiet that was inescapable.

Abigail knew this must’ve been the outskirts of the city given the conditions of the clothing and houses here. The only thing the homes shared was a ramshackle look to their construction and a strange mark written in their surface: Some were made of stone, others wood with a rare building made of metal. Short squat homes built deeper into the ground that were clearly dwarf design clashed horribly with the tall, gravity defying stacked one room story floors that were elvish hobbles.

Abigail pursed her lips, unsure what to make of this whole situation when Oliver’s voice appeared from nowhere, distant and echoing like he was speaking from the other end of a tunnel.

“You okay?”

Abigail jumped, flailing about wildly at the noise that cut through the quiet.

“Don’t do that!” Abigail shouted, annoyed, but nothing came out.

Oliver chuckled to himself soundlessly as he gestured to her with two pointed fingers.

“Haven’s Nest is the biggest city in all the Underground.” His voice crackled “You noticed it in the tunnels, no? How far sounds can travel in a confined space? Imagine trying to live in an entire city like that. You’d lose your hearing within a day. Well less given how much you like talking to people.”

Realization dawned on Abigail as she pointed to the strange items nestled in her ears.

Oliver nodded, his fingers still outstretched “Magical filters. They protect your ears from being overwhelmed by the noise or annoying conversations.”

Abigail thought for a moment before pointing two fingers towards Oliver.

“Is that why…?” she flinched at sudden reemergence of her voice “Wow that’s really off putting. Is that why they just hand them out at the entrance?”

“Mhm. Bad for tourism if you went deaf visiting the capital. Haven’s Nest: come to lose your money, leaving with 50% less hearing.”

Abigail stifled a laugh “So if I point like this?” she gestured with the two fingers “I can talk to people one on one. What if I want to talk to a bunch of people?”

“Make a fist. It’ll let you talk to and hear everything in the immediate area.”

Abigail looked at her hand before closing it into a fist. She winced as the city life popped back into existence without warning: The children shouting and cheering at their losses and victories, small talk about work and how members of the community were doing, unhappy grumbles about the price of food these days and the lack of respect the youth held for their elders.

The city was alive once more.

“Do we have to wear these the whole time?” Abigail asked, opting to keep her fist closed for simplicity's sake.

Archibald shook his head tiredly as he pointed to the strange symbol that were scrawled on every building’s surface.

“Sound bubbles.” Oliver explained “The magical symbols create a little pocket barrier around each building so you can only hear what’s happening inside. It be pretty infuriating if you need to sleep with the filters on. They don’t exactly stick in your ears perfectly.”

Archibald agreed.

“Oh okay. And the…”

“Lights?” Oliver cut in with a knowing smirk “Dwarfish design. A lot of important business happens in Haven’s Nest so a day night cycle is helpful. Harsher light for the day and softer glows for your shady night business.”

“Your shady night business” Abigail glared at Oliver before glancing upwards. Now that the bard pointed it out, she could see what he meant: Hundreds of smooth glass panels were packed tightly together on the ceiling of the cavern. Many of them gleamed with the warm light that bothered her when she first came in but she also noticed some were blackened, either powered down or broken from constant use.

“I take it this is the only place in the underground that has this level of dwarfish engineering.”

“Only non-dwarf city. Dwarves are a little hoardy with their tech.”

Abigail nodded “So this is the boonies, right?”

Oliver gave a mocking look of pride “Look at you knowing your terms. Yeah, this is the less fortune part of town. Still pretty nice all things considered. Up ahead is the Merchant Ward. Well ward is a misnomer but it’s the closest word I can come up with.”

“Looks like someone needs to up their vocab.” Abigail teased.

Archibald chuckled softly.

“And you.” Oliver gestured to the archer “What’s the plan now?”

Archibald eyes shone with understanding. He motioned for Abigail to help and handed her his pack as he began to search for something within. It took a minute but soon Archibald produced a crumpled up envelope. He handed it to Oliver while gratefully smiling at Abigail.

Abigail smiled back as Oliver tore the envelope and read the letter.

“Dear Greenfield and Bard, tis I! Borrick Copperstone. As you now no doubt have discovered, my boy Archie isn’t the most talkative person.”

Oliver spared Archibald a playful look “No kidding.”

Archibald waved Oliver’s comment off.

Oliver cleared his throat, his voice becoming booming and cheery as if mimicking the old dwarf “So I have written this letter with the following instructions. Archibald will be taking the 5 gold payment and I expect you to buy him a fine meal! As promised. In addition, Archibald has been given instructions to wait at the Right Hook inn in the Merchant Ward. Feel free to drop him off or you may part ways once in the city proper. Thank for your business and I wish you safe travels!”

Archibald reached to take the letter back but Oliver slapped his hand away with the paper.

“No.”

Archibald tilted his head quizzically.

Oliver narrowed his eyes “I don’t want you crying to your boss that you got injured on the job and we just dropped you first chance we got. We’re taking you to the Right Hook and we’re gonna keep an eye on you until we are sure you’re better. Right Abigail?”

Abigail was caught off guard by the sudden shift to her but she noticed the knowing glint in Oliver’s eyes “Right. Right! It’s only fair given you risked your life for us. I mean I still need to figure out what I’m going to do next and Oliver’s competition is in a few days so we don’t really have a reason to split up just yet.”

Archibald flushed a lovely bright pink.

“So it’s settled!” Oliver beamed “We’re taking to you Right Hook, get you rested, Abigail will buy you that meal she promised Borrick.”

“Hey!”

“You were negotiating” Oliver pointed out “You made the deal now you have to honor it.”

“I hate you.”

“And” Oliver went on without acknowledging Abigail further “We’ll get you to a cleric tomorrow, maybe do Abigail’s side quest and I still need to sign up for the competition.”

“My side quest?” Abigail’s face scrunched up thoughtfully “Oh! Cecilia’s wizard mentor person. That guy. Wait, how did you…?”

“So we take it easy today then we’ll go out tomorrow. Sorry solider boy you’re stuck with us a little longer.”

Archibald’s face was one of sheepish embarrassment but he smiled appreciatively all the same.

Abigail pursed her lips “Why don’t we do it today? It’s only afternoon if I’m reading the dwarfish sunshine right.”

“We almost died.” Oliver spoke plainly, shooting at glare at some people’s gaze who began to wander their way “I don’t know about you but I don’t wanna deal with anything else except a good meal and being alive.”

Abigail thought about for a moment. She could feel the tension in her body, her arms and legs were stiff. She was okay for now but the idea of doing more things today left her feeling drained.

“Yeah good point. We should take it easy for now. I’m not used to life or death situations.”

“I noticed.” Oliver turned to lead the group “Though it’s not like they get any easier.”

“What?”

“To The Right Hook!”

-----

At first traveling was relatively easy: The outskirts of town held only one path and it was simple to get her bearings situated. However the trouble started when they reached the Merchant Ward of the city.

Without warning the mismatched, battered homes became sleek, colorful uniformed buildings. Traditional human designs of varying heights and hues littered as far as the eye could see, each with the same symbol Oliver had pointed out. While the ceiling was narrow above the outskirts, here the cavern opened impossibly wide. Countless dwarfish panels of light were held high above in differentiating states of decay, blazing nearly as bright as the sun. The road became less stony and move cobbled as the paths branched out in every direction. People of various lifestyles hustled back and forth as the sounds of the city washed over her. Even the little Abigail could hear reminded her of the capitol on the surface, the sheer chaos that existed in larger, more populated places.

Oliver seemed to know where he was going. He would look at these towering signs with names written upon them. Street signs he called them. Abigail never heard of such a thing before but she was grateful for their existence.

As the trio traveled deeper into the Merchant Ward, Oliver began pointing out the various sections of the city.

“Over there.” Oliver pointed to a far off road that curved upwards through a tunnel “is the Clifftop Distract. Rich people turf. Anyone of value or wealth are squirreled away up there.”

“Of course.” Abigail murmured softly to herself. Somethings never changed.

“To the east past the Merchant Ward is East Haven. More homes less business but there are few inns, pubs, stores out there for all your shopping convenience.”

“Like a little village?” Abigail questioned, trying to see if she could equate it to something she knew.

Oliver paused for a moment “Actually yeah. Like a little village next door. Better off than the boonies but not as fancy as Clifftop. Middle of the road as it were. As you can tell, Merch Ward is a little chaotic. Not many people like the idea of living here.”

Abigail raised an eyebrow at a fist fight between a gnome and a dwarf “Couldn’t guess why. And past East Haven?”

“The east gate out of town. Haven’s Nest only has three gates: West in the outskirts, south for the Merchant Ward and East. The west and east are for public use but the south gate is only used for deliveries, soldiers, supplies, patrols etc etc etc.”

“How much further to the Right Hook?”

“Should be round here somewhere, right Archie?”

Archibald nodded in confirmation before pointing a nearby building.

The Right Hook was a wooden building painted a dark red and five stories tall. While the wood outside seemed aged and faded, the doors and window were new as if they had just been replaced. The sign that hung over the doorway was in a fancy font and showed an outstretched hand in the middle of a punch. The hand, ironically, was the left.

“I like it!” Abigail beamed cheerfully “It’s got character.”

“I believe that’s what we call a mistake.”

“It’s charming.”

“It’s wrong.”

“You’re wrong!”

Archibald softly laughed to himself as he followed the arguing pair inside.

The trio took off their filters, carefully placing them away in their pockets for later use. Abigail could feel her ears pop: Every laugh, word, noise was crisp. She could hear the sounds of all within the building but the chaotic symphony of the city remained outside.

“Now what?” she asked, rubbing her aching ears.

“Order some food. I’ll check us in.” Oliver offered “No doubt Borrick probably paid a room for Archie.”

Before Abigail could fathom what Oliver had just said, the bard disappeared deeper within the building.

“Always fun with Ollie huh?”

Archibald snickered then winced as he held his stomach.

“Sorry” Abigail smiled softly “Must be sore. Let’s find a table.”

Archibald and Abigail scanned the room and quickly spotted one nearby. The pair made their way over when Archibald pulled out the chair and gestured for Abigail to take a seat.

Abigail giggled while she sat down “Thank you good sir! I’m glad someone is a gentleman here.”

Archibald flushed as he pushed her chair in and took his own across from her.

-----

Food and drinks were ordered and brought out by the time Oliver returned, a quiet thankful look in his eyes as he noticed the third plate of meat and vegetables steaming in front of an empty seat.

“Thanks” He muttered quietly, sitting at the table.

“You okay?” Abigail watched him carefully “You look like you’re experiencing emotions.”

“I know I hate it.” Oliver gave a cocky smirk and returned to his usual self “Borrick paid for a full week for our good friend Archie so he’s cover.”

“But…” Abigail chimed in “I’m hearing a but.”

“You’re going to have to room with him.”

It wasn’t obvious who was more surprised by this information: Abigail or Archibald. Abigail’s eyes went wide and she could feel a blush spread across her cheeks while Archie simply choked on his drink and began coughing his lungs out.

“WHAT?!” Abigail and Archibald caught each other’s eyes “I...I-I don’t….I mean I don’t mind but…”

Archibald kept choking.

“Relax, it’s not as bad as you think.” Oliver began with a lazy wave of his hand “It’s...well big. On the 5th floor. It’s like a mini home I guess. It’s one room with two separate bedrooms inside. I think. It was a little confusing but I’m betting it’s for whoever is coming to pick him up. You know, to get a day’s of rest before they have to travel back.”

Abigail opened her mouth to protest but Oliver kept going “They only had one other room: A little broom closet on the second floor so be grateful I didn’t shove you in there and decide to bunk with my best friend Archie.”

Archie shot a glare as he finally cleared his throat.

Oliver grinned playfully “It’s only for a day or two until other rooms open up and we can all get our own separate, real rooms.”

“Well.” Abigail twiddled her thumbs “If it’s only for a few days…”

Archibald said nothing, opting to drink his water and hoping no one noticed the red in his cheeks.

“Well then it’s settled!” Oliver said with a hint of finality as he began digging into his meal.

-----

Despite the less than ideal sleeping arrangements, the trio managed to relax: Food, drinks, chatting idly about little things.

Night came quickly and true to Oliver’s warning, Abigail could feel exhaustion ebb into her bones.

The trio made their way to rest and as they dropped off Oliver to his little tiny room, they couldn’t help but ask.

“You sure?” Abigail eyed the broom closet distastefully “You could always sleep in our room. With Archibald.”

Archibald pointed to the floor jokingly.

Oliver gave tired chuckle “I’m good. I’ve slept worse places. Besides I need a break from all….this”

He motioned to the both of them. Abigail was unsure what he meant by that. Archibald simply shot daggers at him.

“Go” he shooed them away “Go and let me get some rest before I gotta deal with both of you in the morning.”

“Okay…..night Oliver.”

Archibald waved goodbye and the pair vanished up the stairs.

Oliver slipped into his room, a small place with a bed on one side and some walking space on the other. A window as wide as the room itself hung on the other end.

A tiny broom closet indeed.

Oliver locked the door behind him and placed his bag onto the floor. He took a moment to hide his lute and the more valuable possession he had, both monetary and sentimental. He cracked his fingers and neck before opening the letter the innkeeper slipped him. Oliver mentally mapped out the location scrawled on the paper then ripped it to shreds.

Oliver brushed clean his outfit from the day’s grime and made his way over to the window. The dwarfish panels shifted to night mode: the warm bright light of the day replaced with a cool, silvery glow that darkened the underground. He pulled out the magic filters from his pocket and put them on. He lifted the window and was grateful the barrier kept the sound outside from coming in.

“Thank god it’s the second floor” he murmured to himself as he began to climb out.

-----

4 hooded figures were huddled in the darkness of an alley, deeply engrossed in their conversation.

The tallest, a muscular woman, fidgeted unhappily “We been waiting for 30 minutes. I don’t think the guy is gonna show.”

Another cloaked figure, a woman a head and half shorter than her companion gently took her hand in her own “Sweetie you need patience.”

The muscular woman flushed in embarrassment “I know Flora but you know how I get antsy when I gotta wait. I hate waiting!”

“I know Terri but we must wait. He will be here. Correct Tyrell?”

Tyrell, a younger gentleman of 20 scratched his chin thoughtfully “That’s what the message said. Came in this morning on the West Gate board. Said he was traveling with some people but he’d meet up with us within the hour of the meeting time.”

“Ugh” Terri groaned “We should get a move on. The party isn’t going to last all night and we got work to do. We need to find the...”

“Wait.” The last figure whispered quietly “I hear something.”

The group held their breath, fists clasped tightly so they can hear what was approaching.

It was faint but Terri could hear the soft patter of footsteps. They moved with such a gentle foot that only Terri’s years of survival training allowed her to catch it.

Terri stood up to her full height, her thick muscular arms tensed for a fight as a shadow inched closer to the group.

“Show yourself!” Terri shouted, falling into a fighting position.

Oliver stepped out of the darkness, his hands lazily in his pockets.

Flora eyed him carefully “Very weird to be wandering back alleys, no sir?”

Oliver cleared this throat “My name is Oliver, First Chair Soprano in The Choir.”

The group shared a surprised look with one another. Their missing fifth member had finally arrived.

“Now.” Oliver spoke with a mischievous smirk “Who we robbing for the greater good?”

[hybbat]

So last night my D&D group that made the veyr first session 9 hours long ended up making the third session 6 hours long because they decided to BUY 20 CHILDREN, STEAL A TRAIN, AND BACKTRACK ALL THE WAY HOME and it all started with them buying a sealed pot from a faun.

So the party was basically supposed to have something of a roadtrip session getting from point A to point B; they were leaving the town they started in, heading south to another town, then west to Steamtown, and then finally a trek through the desert to the crater where the main plot is waiting.

They did everything but the last part, because once they got to Steamtown they decided to walk around and do some shopping and see tourist traps.

The first one to go was Keahi, a fire genasi monk who used to be a normal man and believes himself to be a chosen one, and is a bit of a cultist nut. He had in the previous town taken in a stray dog he named Ember and wanted to buy food and a scarf for her. So he, in all his fiery glory, decided to walk around this magic hating city and was basically chased off by everyone.

He specifically searched for someone who looked similarly outcast and eventually found a faun merchant, named Parmesan, who was set up on a little mat with a very random assortment of wares, some of which were magic, some of which were just straight up broken or trash. Keahi bought a little orange scarf with a sun design on it and then browsed through the rest of Parm’s wares which included a “potion of removal”, a “Staff of Flours”, “Slippers of Fire Walking”, and most importantly, a sealed pot.

At the moment, Keahi’s biggest concern was a smouldering doll that was in the faun’s possession. Parm, whenever he sold something, would toss out a totally random amount of gold, however, but Keahi managed to convince him to trade it for a signed kazoo and a salamander plushy. Keahi, after also buying a scarf, went on his way.

Not long after he left, however, Fable, a battle-dancer bard tiefling who is part of the circus that acts as their homebase, came across the same faun. Fable had been on a mission to retrieve a shipment of wood planks for the circus but had stopped to browse. Fable, realizing this faun had a potion made by an old friend of his, having met his partymate, and also very obviously absolutely an idiot, decided to give Parm a bunch of money in exchange for the shoes and the sealed pot. When asked what was in the sealed pot he didn’t know so it was bought for 200 gp.

Fable discovered it was a literal jackpot filled to the brim with silver, gold, and platinum coins that totalled to around 1600 gp. Feeling guilty about the fact that Parm who was stupid and poor had sold him a pot of money, he went to bring 500 gp of the jackpot back out of guilt and Keahi tagged along.

In the end Fable felt guilty enough to take Parm on a shopping spree. On this shopping spree Parm saw a fortune teller, shrouded in darkness but with lizardfolk hands rubbing a crystal ball. Parm really just wanted the crystal ball but all three got their fortunes told. She predicted the homeless Parm would lose all his money, wife, and house, and that the orphan Keahi would meet someone related by blood who cared very much about him in the future.

Her final prediction was Fable’s, whom she could see great regret in his past, but could see that he would soon no longer have to worry about it, and revealed one green catlike eye to him before cackling as the stand collapsed right before their eyes.

Fable freaked the hell out at this point, because he knows exactly who that was, and realizes he is being watched by someone incredibly dangerous. Fable gives Keahi the instructions for the wood errand and drags Parm back to their camp to calm down.

So, Keahi ends up going to do this errand on his own to retrieve 4 crates of wood planks from a train station. Keahi had never been on a train simply because he was a poor cultist with no previous reason. So Keahi is quite shocked to discover the majority of this rail’s “employees” are, what they claim to be, tailless halflings (in my setting halflings have long monkey tails) but Keahi quickly figures out while interacting with the one who is helping him with his errand that these are in fact child slaves.

Keahi quickly realizes that his method of putting the lumber into the bag of holding is going to require 2 round trips. While leaving to deliver the first half Keahi, wanting to do something nice for this elf child, pays him a tip of 20 gold against the nervous boy’s own wishes.

When he gets back and explains the situation to Fable, formerly being a child slave himself and knowing exactly why the kid didn’t want the money, goes with Keahi for the second shipment, and they quickly discover that the overseer not only stole the gold but roughed the kid up as punishment. Keahi would not stand for this, and so Keahi, along with the boy’s old shaggy dog, confronted the overseer against both Fable and the boy’s wishes. It escalated pretty quickly, Keahi insisting on the money being returned and the overseer playing dumb and threatening to beat him up as well.

Fable, already stressed from earlier and having his own personal past trauma dragged up, stepped in and forced Keahi to back off, and then quietly asked how much it would cost to buy all the children. Against the other worker’s wishes the overseer sold all 20 children for 2000 gp, basically every coin Fable had.

Keahi wasn’t done, though, and very upset by the injustice. So, while the man was distracted, Keahi snuck up on him and sucker punched him with a stunning strike before stealing back all the money. The rest of the workers quickly chased after him right out of the train station, leaving Fable alone with 20 kids, an old dog, and an unattended train.

And unattended train he had all the employees for. 

Keahi had a chase scene but could not get rid of his pursuers. In the end, however, he was saved by a mysterious Tabaxi woman with green eyes who cackled as she ran off.

Meanwhile, Fable had contacted their final party member, Domnall the plague doctor necromancer, who was looking after their pets, Parm, and the carriage, to come to the train station where they were preparing to steal a whole damn train.

Everyone eventually made it back and just as the last of the workers showed up they took off down the tracks, saved by the old dog giving a thunderous bark that froze the workers solid right before they climbed aboard. Thus, the party along with 20 children, a faun, and the 2 dogs (one of which was definitely not actually a dog) rode the rails all the way back to the town they started in, with all their money still, and where they proceeded to buy 2 carts and head north to meet back up with the circus to drop the children off with them to deliver to an orphanage in the next town they were heading to.

And that is how my players turned a well-planned 3-4 hour game into a 6 hour train heist all because of a sealed pot.

[girlmeetsliv3]

K-12: Kindergarten

~ Inspired by Melanie Martinez’s K-12 ~

No one said school was easy nor that it was a fun place. However, Tentoria academy was not a place for the faint of heart, mind, or soul. It’ll be a miracle if you survive your first day - not to mention 12 years. Oh well. Battles to the death, demonic summoning, and interdimensional travel is all part of growing up…right?

Word Count: 1857

Release Date: October 14, 2019, 7 pm (GMT-4)

It was a rather peculiar dream even for you. Granted your five-year-old standards weren’t too high, but it was different from your usual dreams: those were plagued with death, cryptic messages, and content that might have another other child screaming for their parents. You had tried before, but Mommy was always passed out after taking several sips from her special sippy cup and Daddy was never home. This dream was too bright, cheerful with clouds that contained bright rainbows, and sweet music that traveled through your ears. It also smelled sickeningly sweet like the way you felt after eating too much cotton candy after going to the fair by yourself. It was a bit scary for you. That everything was so happy and joyous. You felt it wasn’t going to last. “You need to get going soon.” You turned around to see a beautiful woman decked out in a gold silk dress and braids falling down her back. “Who are you?” you asked, in awe of how pretty she was - almost like an angel. Instead of answering she simply smiled, crouching down to be at eye level with you. 

          “Wake up you’re going to be late.”

           You heard the alarm clock, the metal stick rapidly clashing into the bells in order to emit a dreadful sound. The second your eyes peeled open the clock flew from its position on your bedside table to halfway across the room. You immediately sat up, glancing around the room to see what could have caused such a thing. Was that me? Your eyes focused on the clock, now laying on the floor, and willed it to move. You concentrated so hard that your head began to hurt, it was all a little too much for your small brain to handle. Knowing it wouldn’t do you any good to remain in bed, you stood up walking towards the giant calendar on your wall. Under today were written the words: ‘first day of hell.’ Grabbing your red crayon on the table beside you, a heart was drawn around the words. Your suitcase had been packed the night before, Mommy has been in a good mood, and your uniform was neatly ironed for you to put on. The uniform consisted of a pink frilly dress with white stocking and closed shoes for girls, while it was a light blue collared shirt and blue shorts with dress shoes for boys. You didn’t like pink and the dress was a bit boring, so when your mommy had given you the money to go out and buy the uniform you had bought a purple one instead. One with pretty flowers embroidered into the sleeves. 

           Opting to prolong putting in on and sealing your fate, you went to the bathroom to brush your teeth. Recalling that one dream you had where you opened your mouth and all of your teeth fell out as a red thick liquid filled your throat. You had it after seeing grandma take off her teeth during dinner one night when she didn’t want to talk to Mommy anymore. You counted to up to one hundred and twenty before finishing and going back to your room. You got dressed, grabbing the backpack and suitcase before heading to the kitchen. Mommy was asleep on the couch, drool falling from her open mouth onto the pillow. So you made yourself some breakfast, cereal with milk, before walking to the bus stop. You wanted to say goodbye to her before you left, but she would only be upset that you had woken her up. The walk to the bus stop wasn’t long, only fifteen minutes of you walking at full speed. Thankfully the sun wasn’t out yet or it would’ve been a lot worse. 

           From the distance, you could see someone else standing at the bus stop. A bright green suitcase with heart and unicorn stickers practically everywhere. “Rosé!” The young brunette turned around with shock in her eyes before she recognized your figure running towards her at full speed. Rosé was your only friend in town, her parents were much nicer than yours, but she had once told you that her parents hadn’t really wanted a second child. So she was the scrap compared to her older sister. “Are you excited?” She asked her voice high and squeaky something that happened when she was nervous. “Not really.” Both of you stayed quiet after that, neither knowing what was the right thing to say. It was when the bright white bus filled with screaming kids inside approached that the two of you locked hands. “Do you think we’ll make friends?” you asked, your hand turning white from how tight your grip was. “Hopefully, but we have each other and that’s all that matters.” The two of you exchanged a kind smile, as the bus pulled in front of you and opened its doors. The two of you grabbed your stuff and hauled onto the bus where only two seats at the center remained open.

           It seems no one had paid much attention to either of you prefer to talk loudly amongst each other and make obnoxious noises. That was until you felt something hit the side of your head, and you saw a paper plane fall onto the ground. Picking it up, you opened it before handing it to Rosé. “What does it say?” She sounded it out before turning around and screaming at the boys in the back, “Real mature.” Everyone began to laugh, but from the way you felt all their eyes on you, it wasn’t because of a good thing. Then they all began to chant a specific word, one you had heard your mother say to you when she was upset at you. “Freak.” The words seemed to trap you until you felt the familiar feeling of tears strolling down your face. “Aw does the little crybaby need some tissues?” One of the girls further down asked in a mocking tone. All of her friends laughed before one of them whispered back. “She probably has some in her bra.” Rosé comforted you as best as she could, but with the incessantness of their bullying, it was difficult to. The bus driver was viewing everything from the rearview mirror but didn’t see a point in stopping it. Wasn’t in his job description nor payroll. 

           Eventually, they stopped, getting bored and seeking entertainment in other ways. A child’s attention span wasn’t very long anyway. The bus had left the city and was now entering a highway, after a while, you saw a sign that read: Tentoria Academy K-12 Sleepaway School. The only time you would get to see your parents from now on would be on the weekend, which wasn’t a big deal since you barely saw them whilst you were at home. The bus slowed to a stop as it picked up the final kid, a young boy with chubby cheeks and a bright smile. The second he stepped on with his blue backpack with small frills on the ends, you felt your heart flutter. “Oh my god, Y/n. You’re blushing.” Rosé poked fun at you. Your stomach hurt and your heart began to race, but it wasn’t because of what you ate. Nor was it due to the way the other kids treated you; it was all him. Tentatively you stood up and opened your mouth to greet him when you were interrupted. “Jimin!” A taller boy pushed past you and embraced Jimin, the two of them laughing. 

           “I thought you weren’t going to come.”

           “Duh, loser. How could I not?”

           The two boys engaged in a playful banter completely ignoring the world around them. Dejectedly, you fell back into your seat. A full-on put had formed on your lips and the space between your brows wrinkled. “Are you okay?” You nodded at Rosé, simply staring outside the window. You hadn’t even arrived at school and already you hated it, wishing something anything could happen to stop the bus. Your prayers were answered when the bus driver suddenly turned on the road, causing the bus to start spinning uncontrollably. Screams from both you and your peers were so high, they practically shattered the glass windows. Thankfully they didn’t, for when the bus spun so much it broke through the railing and went straight into the lake. Those windows were the only thing that prevented your imminent death. The bus driver was passed out a large gash on the side of his head. You glanced around frantically as Rosé tried to get the door to open for everyone to swim out. The school bus was drifting to the bottom of the lake, the pressure keeping the doors jammed. “We’re gonna die here!” One of the girls screamed out. “I don’t know how to swim.” echoed another. 

Rosé and you looked at each other before grasping each other’s hands. You both closed your eyes and softly began to pray. “I wish this bus would float. Float so high it went up to the sky.” You don’t know how or why the two of you were speaking those specific words, but they felt right. So you kept repeating them. Repeating them until it was practically second nature to you both, then you both opened your eyes. At first, all you saw was white, so much that you assumed you were in heaven. Once you saw the dewdrops forming on the glass you realized something else - “They’re clouds,” Rosé spoke awe clear in her voice. Everyone else had gathered trying to look outside. The bus was floating so high above that it was difficult to make out the things on the ground, slowly though it was going down. No one dared speak, it was as if it was a dream and everyone was afraid to shatter it. The school bus got closer and closer to the ground until the wheels hit the solid pavement and it caused such turbulence it made everyone fly from their seats. It even woke up the bus driver. Coincidentally, it seems you had been dropped off right in front of the school.

It was rather large in size. A pearly white with high arches and accents that instantly drew you in, but something felt off about the place. It was too picturesque and beautiful, something was bound to go wrong. Nice things always turned sour fast. Everyone hurried to get off the bus, while Rosé and you lingered behind; waiting until everyone had gone inside. As you climbed down the steps, you hesitated a bit before stepping on the ground. Feeling that once you did, you might never be able to go back. Rosé gave you a slight nudge which encouraged you to take that final step. “Everything will be fine.” You said, mostly to yourself. “Of course it’ll be. What’s the worst that could happen?” Rosé was trying to be strong, but you could hear the nerves in her voice. She’s right. What’s the worst that could happen? So the two walked together until you reached the giant school doors. You entered feeling prepared for whatever might come your way.

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: Everything Money Can Buy (5/12)

Summary: The Greatest Store in the World AU. When misfortune strikes and leaves Emma Swan and her son homeless just before Christmas, the ever-resourceful Emma has a ready solution. They’ll move into Mills Department Store, a place they can only dream of affording to buy from. It’s not easy, having to deal with a perpetually grumpy doorman, a nasty assistant manager, and an extremely suspect Santa, but Emma and Henry soon learn that the kindness of strangers is something money can’t buy.

Swan Believer centric, with eventual Swan Queen and background Rumbelle and Dwarf Star.

Rated: G

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[One] [Two] [Three] [Four] [AO3]

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Five

Henry had to admit that he felt a lot safer sleeping in the tent in the basement than he had done in beds and bedlinen. The zipped-up tent flap added an extra layer of security against, well, the security guards, and sleeping in sleeping bags with the lantern hanging above them reminded him of the van. It was almost a home from home. As much as he didn’t really want to live in Mills for any longer than they had to – the risks seemed to far outweigh the benefits, in his opinion – he could see himself being happy camping indoors for a while.

Or at least, he could have done, until the moment that he woke up on Sunday morning. The main lights in the shop were up, and he could hear people moving around outside the tent.

“Please let it be the cleaners,” he whispered to himself, and he unzipped the tent flap a minute fraction to peep out.

It was not the cleaners. The people just a few feet away from him, looking at sleeping bags, were most definitely customers, and to make matters even worse, they definitely had a sales assistant with them, pointing out the various merits of various different kinds of sleeping bags. As pleased as Henry was to know that the particular model that he himself was currently inside was one of the best they sold and the one that the shop assistant would personally recommend, that did not stop the rising feeling of dread that and Mum had found themselves in what could euphemistically be termed a bit of a pickle.

“Mum!” He scrambled out of his sleeping bag and shook Mum’s shoulder. “Mum! We overslept! The shop’s open!”

“What?” Mum grumbled. “It’s a Sunday, they don’t open till ten, what are you talking about…” She grabbed her phone and looked at the time.

It was ten fifteen.

“Well, bugger.” She looked at the tent flap. “No one’s going to want to look inside this tent, though, are they?”

Henry shrugged. “Maybe not, but we can’t exactly get out whilst they’re out there.” He pointed at the vague shadows of bodies that could be seen through the tent material.

“Good point. Right. We’d better get dressed and think of a plan.”

Henry and Mum had had to make some daring escapes from some daring places before in their time, so gathering together all of their things in either the dead of night or the middle of the day, or from a very small space, was nothing entirely new to them. All the same, Henry was quite certain that this was the most fraught that the experience had ever been. The need to keep very quiet wasn’t exactly helping, although thankfully the background music of looped Christmas pop tunes drowned out most of the noise of them moving luggage around.

Once they were ready to leave, Mum listened at the tent flap for a while. They really couldn’t stay here much longer; Henry’s stomach was growling and the longer they stayed, the greater their chance of discovery would be.

“Is there anyone there?” Henry whispered.

Mum shook her head. “I can’t tell. I think we’re just going to have to make a break for it.”

With a sudden, decisive movement, she unzipped the tent flap, startling the couple who had been looking at sleeping bags and who had appeared to have opted for the sales assistant’s recommendation. Thankfully, the assistant himself had wandered off. She grabbed her backpack and ushered Henry out of the tent.

“Well, the tent is definitely big enough for us and the backpack,” she said brightly, brushing herself off. “Come on Henry, we’ll come back and buy one later. We’ve got other shopping to do.”

They hurried off towards the escalators, leaving the astonished shoppers behind them.

“Do you think they bought it?” Henry asked.

“I have no idea, but we only have to get outside, I don’t think they’re likely to raise that much of a fuss in the time it takes us to get up one escalator and out of the door.”

There were all kinds of things that were wrong with that statement, and Henry couldn’t help but be nervous about all the luggage that they had left piled in the tent with the post-its on, but before he could point this out to Mum, they tripped at the last hurdle. Literally, almost. They were nearly out of the door, going as quickly as they possibly could without drawing attention to themselves, when Mum almost collided with Gold.

Henry had always thought that Gold looked very impressive and very terrifying in his uniform, and right now, he looked even more terrifying than he had ever done.

“Sorry,” Mum said cheerily. “If we could just…” She made to dodge past him, tugging on Henry’s hand, but Gold stood steadfastly in their way.

“I didn’t see you come in this morning,” he said, his tone accusatory, and Henry gulped, glancing up at Mum and hoping that she could talk their way out of this one like she’d talked them out of so many other scrapes in the past.

“Well, you know, it’s a big shop and there are a lot of shoppers. Only have to turn your back for a moment and someone can slip by you. I mean, what about now, you’re not monitoring everyone coming in and out now, are you?”

“That’s not the point,” Gold snapped. “I don’t recall you leaving last night, either. I generally have a good memory for these things.”

“Good for you. Keep eating the carrots. Or is that seeing in the dark? Anyway, if you don’t mind, our purchases have been completed and we’d like to leave the store.”

Gold looked her up and down. “Where are your bags?”

Emma patted the backpack. “Save the planet, cut down on plastic waste. Honestly, where are your environmental credentials, Mr Gold?”

“It’s ok, Alistair.”

Belle from the customer service desk came over to them, smiling brightly.

“I saw them come in earlier,” she said. “You were helping unfold Mrs Rothschild out of her taxi.”

Gold looked from Belle to Mum to Henry and back again, then gave an unsure nod and stood aside. Mum gave him her sweetest, butter wouldn’t melt smile, and they left the store just as Zelena’s high heels clattered down the main steps and her less than dulcet tones could be heard admonishing Gold.

“Mr Gold! I believe we had a conversation yesterday about the doorman’s primary location being on the outside of the building!”

Mum and Henry sped around the side of the shop before Gold could come out and find them loitering on the doorstep. It was only once they were out of sight that Henry felt able to breathe freely again.

“She knows, Mum,” he said mournfully. “Belle must know that we’re sleeping in the shop. Because she definitely didn’t see us come in this morning.”

“Yeah.” Mum leaned back against the wall to get her breath back. “Yeah, she must realise that something’s up. Damn it! Oh Henry, I’m so sorry. I was so certain that we’d found somewhere safe.”

“It’s ok.” Henry knew that Mum was trying her best. “We can find somewhere else.”

Although maybe, now that he thought about it, they wouldn’t have to. Belle had covered for them. She hadn’t seen them go in, and she had lied anyway and got them out of their scrape with Gold. And Belle liked Gold, Henry knew that much just from watching their interaction the previous day. She wouldn’t be doing it to get one over on him.

Maybe, just maybe, she was helping them out of the goodness of her heart, and she was actually helping them.

Henry put this tentative hope to Mum as they walked along in search of breakfast. She said nothing for a long time; Mum was used to not trusting anyone to have her best interests at heart. It had been so long since they’d benefitted from the kindness of strangers that she had begun to believe that it did not exist, although Henry still had faith in it.

He had faith in Belle not to give away their secret.

X

Gold was not having a good day. In fact, a day when Gold did have a good day was a rarity lately. His ex-wife had announced that she would be having their son for Christmas this year despite having had him last year and promising that he could stay with his dad this year, and Gold didn’t have the money or energy to try and dispute her. On top of that, he was cold, tired, and in pain, and he was feeling extremely old. His ankle was complaining bitterly about the long days spent outside in the freezing temperatures; it had been so swollen when he’d woken up this morning that he could barely get his support on, but if he’d left it off then he wouldn’t be able to move by the end of the day.

And, of course, there was the woman and the boy, the ones he wasn’t sure about. There was something fishy about them and the vast amounts of baggage that they always had whenever they came into the store. The fact that they’d left without the vast amounts of baggage this morning gave him even more cause for concern than them leaving with the baggage did. If they’d left with it, then he could put them down as petty thieves – not that it was possible for any kind of thievery in a store like Mills to be petty. Leaving the bags was altogether more perplexing. And he really hadn’t seen them come in this morning, and he wasn’t sure that Belle was telling the complete truth either. Still, he trusted Belle. She would have had her reasons for covering for them, he was sure.

Adding the cherry on top of this rather fine cake of complaints, Zelena was acting like a complete nutcase again, seeming to take a great delight in dressing him down in front of myriad customers whenever she found him inside the building in an effort to stop himself from freezing solid outside, and yet being rather overly friendly whenever they were together in private. He tried to avoid her at all costs, but she always seemed to have a way of finding him after staff briefings and trying to corner him. He couldn’t really tell exactly what she wanted, and he had come to believe that her constant reminding him of his place in the proverbial pecking order was some kind of punishment for rejecting her.

Right now, he was prepared to take it as long as it meant that he could stay away from her rapidly widening aura of insanity.

Gold rubbed his hands together, stamping his feet on the freezing paving slabs outside the door, waiting for customers coming in and out. The handwarmers that Belle had given him yesterday were a blessing, and Gold wished that they made a suit out of the material that he could wear under his uniform to keep him toasty in his entirety.

Actually, forget the handwarmers. Belle herself was a blessing. Right now, it felt like she was the only bright spark in his entire miserable life, and he desperately wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, but he could never bring himself to make a move. After all, who in their right mind would want him? He was probably twice her age for a start, not to mention the fact that he’d gone through a very acrimonious divorce, and he was still recovering from the alcoholic funk that he’d settled into after that had happened. It was a miracle that he’d landed the job at Mills, if he was honest, which was why he knew that he couldn’t complain about it, or about Zelena, too much. He owed a lot to Regina Mills, and if that meant putting up with everything he hated about his job, then so be it. At least he had a roof over his head and food on the table, and his son didn’t hate him quite as much as he’d done a few years ago.

Gold’s thoughts meandered back to Belle. Maybe he ought to take a chance and ask her out. It could be something very casual. He could ask her if she was going to the staff party on Christmas Eve. That way he could just arrange to see her there. It was a big enough shop, after all, they could definitely avoid each other if it got awkward. And it wouldn’t seem too much like a date then; just two colleagues looking out for each other during an evening of drunkenness and general debauchery. Ever since Belle had joined Mills, he’d always shared a camaraderie with her that went beyond the normal interactions of two colleagues who didn’t really know each other all that well. They were united against Zelena, both of them looking out for opportunities to undermine her whenever they could and lamenting the fact that those opportunities did not come anywhere near as often as they would like.

Or maybe he could begin the conversation by asking her what she was reading at the moment. She always had a book with her under the customer service desk and was very good at sneaking a quick half a page whilst looking like she was busy on the computer. Gold had found that his own reading repertoire had increased greatly since meeting Belle, as she was always so enthusiastic about her books and he wanted to experience the same kind of joy that she did from them. It didn’t always work; there were several titles that they’d ended up getting into passionate arguments about in the staff breakroom after hours, but Gold didn’t really care. It gave him an excuse to talk to her, after all.

The suspicious-looking mother and son were coming back. They’d left the store so early this morning, practically before they’d had chance to buy anything, and he hadn’t seen them again. His eyes met the blonde woman’s as they came past, and she narrowed hers, hurrying her son along the pavement and not trying to come in. He wondered if they’d try again when his back was turned. For all Mills was a large shop and took up most of the block, it only had the one entrance, so if they wanted to get in, then they would have to go through him. Gold sighed. He should probably just let them in; it would be his act of Christmas charity for the year. At the same time, though, knowing that someone was living in the store and not doing anything about it was a sure way to get himself fired, and getting fired just a couple of days before Christmas was not something anyone wanted. Maybe he could plead ignorance. Hopefully, whoever they were, they were canny enough not to get caught by someone who wasn’t Belle and didn’t have a kind heart.

The door began to open from the inside and Gold moved automatically to take it. When he saw who was coming out, he very nearly let the heavy glass slam back in his face. Killian, this year’s store Santa, a last-minute replacement for Marco, came out of the building and pulled his beard down, taking a long swig from a hipflask.

“You know that Zelena will pull your innards out if she finds you drinking on the job,” he said conversationally.

Killian just glared. “If I’m outside then I’m not on the job,” he muttered. “You try dealing with hundreds of screaming kids and even more screaming parents.”

As much as Killian rubbed him up the wrong way, Gold did have the tiniest bit of sympathy for him. Christmas always brought out the worst in people. It was a shame that Santa didn’t have a naughty list for adults as well.

Killian continued to stand on the steps beside him. Quite the pair they made, really, Gold in his resplendent uniform and Killian in his ill-fitting red and white suit, reeking of rum.

“The bird on customer services,” Killian said presently. Gold bristled; calling any woman a bird wasn’t great, but especially not Belle. “Do you know if she’s single?”

“I haven’t the faintest idea,” Gold reply through gritted teeth. The seething anger was lost on Killian, who just shrugged.

“Huh. Might try my luck at the party. You know no-one ever gets fired for a bit of bad behaviour under the mistletoe at a Christmas party.” He waggled his eyebrows and Gold glared, opening the door with rather more force than necessary.

“Get back in there before Zelena throws a fit, and for God’s sake find a breath mint somewhere.”

Killian just laughed, but dutifully went back inside. Gold was so angry that he let the blonde woman and her son back into the shop without paying them any mind at all.

[congregamus]

A LONG TIME AGO, up in the mountains, there lived an old peddler. This was back in the days before 7-Elevens and convenience stores. Back in those days, if you wanted to buy something, you had to get it from a peddler or do without. The peddler went around to any place where people gathered, opened up his pack, and spread out his wares for people to see. But he wasn’t a very good businessman. For instance, let’s say a boy picked up a jackknife and asked, “Well, sir, how much is this?” And the peddler would say, “Oh, it’s fifty cents.” And the boy’s face would fall because that was more money than the child had. But when the peddler saw the boy’s face, he’d say, “Why don’t you take it and put it in your pocket? It’d be lighter in your pocket than in my pack.” And the boy would run off to show the knife to his friends. Or maybe a girl would come by, hold up a handful of bright,pretty ribbons and say, “Ooh! How much are these?” And the peddler would say, “They’re a nickel.” And the girl’s face would fall, because she knew her daddy didn’t have a nickel for such foolishness as ribbons. But the peddler would say, “Aw, take ‘em and wear ‘em in your hair. They’ll be prettier in your hair than they would be all wrinkled up in the bottom of the pack.” And the girl, maybe she had her eye on some fella. She’d tie those ribbons up in her hair and run off to see if she could find him. So the people laughed at the peddler. They’d nudge one another and say, “He gives away more than he sells. He’d give away his own head if it wasn’t tied on. You just watch. One day he’ll give away everything he’s got.” The peddler lived in a little cabin. And outside the cabin was a big garden. And in the middle of the garden was an enormous cherry tree. Every night, the peddler sat on the back steps watching the rabbits scamper and play as they ate most of the vegetables in the garden. Or watching the blackbirds swoop down on the tree and pick off most of the ripe fruit. People said, “Why don’t you go out there and shoo away those thievin’ birds and animals? They’re robbing you blind.” And he’d say, “They don’t steal from me. Why, what they take is kind of a payment, because I love to watch the rabbits play. They keep me company. And there’s no place on earth where the birds sing as sweetly as in the top of that tree.” People would crow, “He’s a fool! A fool and his money are soon parted. You just watch. Before long, he’ll be at our back door, begging for a handout.” Well, the contents of the peddler’s pockets kept getting smaller. And the contents of the pack got smaller, too. And finally the day did come when the peddler had given away pretty much everything he owned of any value’. And that night he went to bed hungry. And, don’t you know, a hungry man is going to dream. That night, he dreamed he saw an angel standing at the foot of his bed. And the angel said, “Peddler, follow the road into town. Stand by the courthouse. There you’ll see what you’re to see and hear what you’re to hear.” But when the peddler woke up, his empty stomach seemed like an awfully poor traveling companion. So he didn’t go anywhere. But that night the angel was back and again he said, “Peddler, follow the road to town. Stand by the courthouse. You’ll see what you’re to see and hear what you’re supposed to hear.” But when he got up the peddler was so weak and hungry, he wasn’t sure he could even make it into town. The third night he had the very same dream again. So when the peddler woke up, he said to himself, “Third time’s a charm.” As it turned out, a wagon happened by and offered him a ride all the way into town. He stood by the courthouse and watched people as they went by. He stood there in the cold wind but nobody spoke to him, and he didn’t see anything unusual. At the end of the day, as the sun was going down, he thought to himself, “Well, I guess I’ll have to find shelter in an alley for the night. I’ll never make it back home. I’m just too weak.” He was crossing the courthouse square when a man came out of an inn across the street and said, “Buddy, I’ve been watching you all day. You’ve been standing out there as if you were expecting something. I want to know what’s going on.” But when he saw how weak the old peddler was, he said, “Tell you what, you come on into my inn and have a meal. I’ll satisfy your hunger and you can satisfy my curiosity.” So the old peddler went in and had the best meal he’d had in a long time. When he’d finished eating, the man pulled up a chair and said, “Now, tell me your story.” The peddler looked him in the eye and said, “I dreamed a dream.” “What?” “I dreamed a dream.” “You mean to tell me you stood out there all day long in that ragged coat in the cold wind because you dreamed some stupid dream?” The peddler nodded. And the man said, “That’s the dumbest thing that I ever heard of in my whole life. I dream dreams, too. But I don’t pay any attention to the things I dream about. I stay right here and tend to business like a sensible person ought to. Why, just last night I dreamed that an angel appeared to me and told me that if I followed that road out into the country, I’d come to a little cabin. And outside the cabin would be a big garden. And in the middle of the garden would be an enormous cherry tree. And the angel said that if I dug underneath the roots of that cherry tree, I’d find gold. Now where would I be if I’d paid attention to my dreams? Why, I’d be traipsing around the countryside looking for some stupid cherry tree.” The peddler thanked the man for the meal, got up, and with a lot more energy, walked home. When he reached his little cabin, he took a shovel and went out into that garden and began to dig underneath the cherry tree. It wasn’t long before he hit something solid. He got down on his knees and brushed dirt from atop an old wooden box. It was covered with strange carvings. And when he opened it up, he found gold. Pieces of eight, pieces of six—old Spanish gold. And the good he did in the spending of it, that part I haven’t got time to tell you.

Caldwell, Troy. Adventures in Soulmaking: Stories and Principles of Spiritual Formation and Depth Psychology 

Please let this be true. Please please please.

[thisislizheather]

February Feats 2020

I write this from underneath two blankets, perched atop three pillows. This is day three of being sick (Nathan just joined me in illness yesterday) and I think I’m getting better but that could just be blind hope. In any case, I still have to tell you what went on last month. Forgive the tone of this post, it might be… affected.

I heard that Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker are going to be in the Paul Simon play Plaza Suite together and so I casually thought “Ooo, might be nice to catch” so I looked it up and tickets START at $700. So I guess fuck me then. I swear to god, this fucking city.

The best cover so far this year:

Above Photo: Brian Stauffer, The New Yorker

I rewatched a movie I love: The Door In The Floor and it really holds up well. Kim Basinger and Jeff Bridges and both too good at what they do. Love this movie so much.

I rewatched The Evil Dead and look I understand it’s probably a “good horror movie” especially for its time and budget, but I fucking hated it, maybe even more so than the last time that I saw it. Never again. Why do I keep rewatching things that I hate? I don’t have to like everything. I must repeat this to myself daily.

I had lunch at Daily Provisions and their lemon cruller was really good and light and the chicken club sandwich was good, too. Always a solid morning/afternoon place.

Favourite tweets of the month.

I tried Trader Joe’s Whole Wheat Couscous and maaaaan, it was so good. So I guess all couscous is good? Gotta get my hands on that pearly couscous. That seems like the money cousocus.

I made this Greek Couscous Salad for lunches for a week and didn’t get sick of it at all, I gotta remember to keep this in the rotation. I also kept the salad and the couscous separate until I wanted to eat, and then I’d join them together.

I can’t believe I hadn’t seen this sketch before (calling someone a “goofy bitch” just about killed me), also ignore how bad an actress Cardi B is.

I finished watching The Good Place and yes it was a good show. I don’t think l liked it as much as pretty much everyone else in my life who loved it, but it was definitely a good show. This scene was the best part of the finale, for sure. That song used in the scene will always elicit tears, I remember falling in love with it when it was used in the movie that everyone hated but me, Swept Away.

Again, I visited Everlane and it still disappoints. Why do I keep thinking it’ll be different each time? What the fuck is wrong with me?

I saw Parasite and it was wonderful and everyone who hasn’t seen it should see it. I haven’t heard from one person who didn’t like it. Universally liked!

I listened to the new Strokes single and hated it, so that’s something. Growth?

I haven’t seen the whole episode yet, but I really liked RuPaul’s SNL monologue.

Why isn’t everyone putting pickles on grilled cheese? Makes no sense. Fucking taste explosion.

I finally tried the (off-menu, must be requested when it’s not brunch) Cacio E Pepe at L’Artusi and holy christ, it might be better than their mushroom ragu. I KNOW. Such wild developments! (They also started serving at lunch, but only lunch delivery, not dine-in. SO this means nothing to me.)

I think I will officially stop buying candles from Bath & Body Works. The ones at Marshalls are cheaper, last longer and the variety of scents is endless. I have a candle from Marshalls right now simply called STORM and it really does kinda smell like stormy weather. Obviously I’m waiting for a thunderstorm to light that mother. I have mental issues?

I watched the newest season of Shrill (no big spoilers ahead) and loved it, obviously. The disappointing-ness of parents is so nicely shown (that moment at the restaurant when she asks her dad what he thinks of her boyfriend and he’s so indifferent, ugh so perfect), I absolutely LOVED the wedding episode (infact all of the episodes following that one are the best ones, I think I just love the episodes not centered about this not-great relationship with her and her boyfriend), the WEHAM episode is perfect (finally someone making fun of makeup for for legs), and I continue to love the character Fran. Really hoping for a third season, especially based on the season finale.

Don’t ask me why, but I watched most of the Police Academy movies and I think the Miami one might be the best one?? I couldn’t make it twenty minutes into the Moscow one, so I feel like you might want to trust me when I say that I know what I’m talking about.

These are my new favourite leggings of all time, they feel like you’re wearing nothing at all.

Cannot get over the beauty of these women and these outfits.

Above Photo: Camila Mendes

Above Photo: Nyma Tang

I watched the Michelle Carter documentary and I don’t know how other people feel, but it’s absolutely unreal that she was found guilty. Of course Nathan disagrees.

I ate at Frank for the first time in over a decade with the one and only Irene and it’s still great. Love that they do the opposite of al dente pasta here. Photos below.

Above Photo: Tagliatelle special, at Frank

Above Photo: Roasted garlic bread, at Frank

Above Photo: Mushroom pappardelle special, at Frank

I can’t find a link for them online, but I bought some reusable Leak Proof Snack Bags by Kitchen Details at Nordstrom Rack and they’re perfect since we typically use a million of those disposable ones for holding sunflower seeds and almonds

I threw out a lot of clothing/shoes/bags, so I went out and bought some things that I absolutely love. I now have a faux fur, brown evening coat that I’ve long dreamed of owning, a new everyday purse, a vintage, gold, mesh evening purse, new everyday shoes, more sunglasses and some new wedges that may or may not replace the older wedges I’ve had since 2006 (the ones lovingly referred to as my Terminators because of the massive fall that I took in them upon exiting the movie Terminator Salvation). I could show you all of the new pieces, but I’d much rather slide into a room you’re in to show you my new fur coat. However if it annoys you not to see any of these new things that bring my joy, here are two of them.

Above Photo: Classic Reeboks from DSW

Above Photo: I also got them in blue

I’ve actually started using tiny drops of facial oil mixed with my nighttime face lotion and even though I’ve only just started to do this, my face is already way less dry when waking up. I don’t know if I can do this in the hotter weather, but for now I’ll keep it up.

I know all of these are old songs, but I recently heard and fell in love with this Taylor Swift song. And this one. And this one. Oh and this one too.

I went to Giorgio’s of Gramercy again (the last time was a few years ago with Nathan) and it’s still great! I haven’t had a steak in awhile, but the one here? Holy hell. Magnificent.

I went to see the new Kubrick 2001 exhibit at the Museum of the Moving Image and it was pretty neat. They have one of his Oscars on display in a case, which was actually really cool to see.

I read and reviewed a biography of Johnny Carson that truly sucked.

So Nathan and I are in the middle of watching McMillion$ and can I just say: boooooooooooooooo. I’ve never seen a “documentary” more over-produced, self-indulgent, superfluous and WILDLY overdone. It’s a bloody six part series that could’ve EASILY been an hour and a half movie. If you ever need proof of a documentary having too much money spend, my god have you found it. Of COURSE Mark Wahlberg has something to do with it, this man needs to fucking STOP. I know they are countless other men attached to the project too, but it’s much easier to shit on just him. God, what a waste of time. The Wikipedia page is more succinct.

I watched To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before 2: P.S. I Still Love You and it was everything I wanted it to be and more. Loved the Adventures in Babysitting reference right off the top (I’ll forever love that movie and it doesn’t get talked about enough), I loved pretty much every musical choice (these are my top three songs from the movie), and I loved the idea of doing another Thanksgiving in March (although I’m pretty sure Chrissy Teigen did this a few years ago and planted that great seed in my head). Definitely the best thing on Netflix at the moment.

Seeing this restored footage of NYC in 1911 is both exciting and eerie as hell, for some reason.

Nathan and I went to the Raptors game that ended their winning streak, sorry about that.

I’ve been consumed with reading so much stuff about what’s going on right now and this was a little helpful: 4 Practical Ways to Prepare Your Home for a Pandemic. Don’t judge me for sharing this link! I’m delirious.

Things that I’m looking forward to this month: visiting Collingwood and going skiing with my family, I might splurge and get that mini birthday cake from Momofuku Milk Bar, and the new season of On My Block comes out on the 11th. I’m pretty into the idea of turning 35, usually I’m more jacked about my birthday month but I think I’m too down to care at the moment. Caring coming soon.

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in January over here.

[bobbystompy]

The Slim Shady 20

Eminem’s “The Slim Shady LP” came out, I’m told, 20 years ago. Though the album is, in many ways, dated, homophobic, problematic, sexist, and just as differently offensive now as it equally was originally, it’s still extremely excellent. Instead of going too think piece-y, I wanted to write about my favorite bars.

While Eminem’s career definitely hit higher highs with latter releases, this is my favorite album in his catalogue. He was just as angry, but it was channeled; not distorted by fame or worn down by addiction or jaded by lawsuits or persevering through death of loved ones. This was 26-year-old Marshall, getting his head above water in time to start machine gunning expletives at the world around him.

And please remember, in his words, “If I’m talking too fast, it just means you’re listening too slow.”

20.

I wanted an album so rugged, nobody could touch it Spent a million a track and went over my budget (Oh, shit) Now, how in the fuck am I supposed to get out of debt? I can't rap anymore, I just murdered the alphabet

Immediate thesis statement.

19.

If I had a magic wand I'd make the world suck my dick without a condom on while I'm on the john

Really dislike this lyric, but it’s unflinching grossness hits every time.

18. 

I met a s*** and said, "What up? It's nice to meet ya I'd like to treat you to a Faygo and a slice of pizza”

This lyric does not exist going forward because any success carries you beyond it. Shades of “Exhibit C’s” masterful “When I was sleepin' on the train / Sleepin' on Meserole Ave out in the rain / Without even a single slice of pizza to my name” exactly 10 years later.

17.

This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph So I signed it, "Dear Dave, thanks for the support, asshole"

Doesn’t even rhyme; he hated his fans from the very beginning.

16. 

‘Cause I'm the one they can relate to and look up to better Tonight, I think I'll write my biggest fan a "fuck you" letter

Gave you every, immediate chance to get away.

15.

I'm freestylin' every verse that I spit 'Cause I don't even remember the words to my shit

Nah --  you’re way too meticulous, Shady.

14.

I'm not a player, just a ill rhyme sayer That'll spray a aerosol can up at the ozone layer

I like when his evil imagery turns half-baked adolescent; might as well brag about melting ants with your magnifying glass.

13.

Tell her you need a place to stay You'll be safe for days if you shave your legs with Renee's razor blades

Some fun internals; plus the part right before taught me what “gaffle” meant.

12.

I just remembered that I'm absent-minded Wait, I mean I've lost my mind, I can't find it

+

I used to be a loudmouth, remember me? (“Uh-uh”) I'm the one who burned your house down (“Oh”) Well, I'm out now (“Shit”)

Two of my favorite circular lines.

11.

Some people only see that I'm white, ignorin' skill 'Cause I stand out like a green hat with a orange bill But I don't get pissed, y'all don't even see through the mist How the fuck can I be white? I don't even exist

Had to address the elephant in the room.

10.

You beef with me, I'ma even the score equally Take you on Jerry Springer and beat your ass legally

Man with a plan.

9.

These are the results of a thousand electric volts, a neck with bolts Nurse, we're losin' him, check the pulse

Always a lab-created monster.

8.

I want to make songs all the fellas dub And murder every rich rapper that I'm jealous of So just remember, when I bomb your set Yo, I only cuss to make your mom upset

Cracked the code for us.

7.

Got b****** on my jock out in East Detroit 'Cause they think that I'm a motherfuckin' Beastie Boy So I told 'em I was Mike D They was like, "Gee, I don't know, he might be" I told 'em, "Meet me at Kid Rock's next concert I'll be standin' by the Loch Ness Monster"

This one checks many boxes: The D, local-yet-hilariously-dated celeb name check, misogyny, mythical creatures.

6.

But they love it when you make your business public So fuck it, I've got herpes while we on the subject And if I told you I had AIDS, y'all would play it 'Cause you stupid mothafuckas think I'm playin' when I say it Well, I do take pills, don't do speed Don't do crack, don't do coke, I do smoke weed Don't do smack, I do do shrooms, do drink beer I just wanna make a few things clear My baby mama's not dead, she's still alive and bitching And I don't have herpes, my dick's just itchin' It's not syphilis, and as for being AIDS-infested I don't know yet, I'm too scared to get tested

One of the only times he breaks the fourth wall.

5.

I hang with a bunch of hippies and wacky tobacco planters Who swallow lit roaches and light up like jack-o-lanterns Outsidaz, baby, and we suin' the courts 'Cause we dope as fuck and only get a ‘2′ in The Source

This was soon corrected.

4.

That's what I did, be smart, don't be a r***** You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped Dee Barnes? “What you say?” What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember? “I'ma kill you, motherfucker” Uh-uh, temper, temper Mr. Dre, Mr. N.W.A, Mr. AK Comin' straight outta Compton, y'all better make way

Distilling Dre’s career -- warts and all -- into a flurry of knockout punches.

3.

I'll listen to your demo tape and act like I don't like it Six months later, you'll hear your lyrics on my shit ("That's my shit"!) People don't buy shit no more, they just dub it That's why I'm still broke and had the number-one club hit

Everything we’ve ever learned about Eminem has taught us he’s a tortured obsessive... yet this stretch feels effortlessly perfect. Plus, it gives us a clairvoyant outlook on the perils of massive-success-without-actually-making-money in the YouTube/streaming era.

2.

Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole When we heard a knock at the door, must've been Ron Gold Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold Killed them both, then smeared blood on the white Bronco (We did it)

So offensive it almost laps itself back into normalcy. The unflinching “We did it” at the end is psychotic, horrible, and confident.

1.

 Fuck rap, I'm givin' it up, y'all, I'm sorry (”But Eminem, this is your record release party!”)

Tried to get out the game on his debut; Jay Electronica would be proud.

Honorable mentions...

I lay awake and strap myself in the bed With a bulletproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (Bang) I'm steamin' mad (Grr) And by the way, when you see my dad (Yeah?) Tell him that I slit his throat in this dream I had

There’s something casual about his fantasy murder of his father that really made the end stretch of this hit home. This is the closing of his final verse in “My Name Is”; he was never playing.

Man, ain't you ever seen that one movie “Kids”? No, but I seen the porno with Sun Doobiest

Em’s devil to Dre’s angel.

My palms were sweaty, and I started to shake at first Somethin' told me, "Try to fake a stomach ache, it works" I screamed, "Ow, my appendix feel like they could burst Teacher, teacher, quick, I need a naked nurse" "What's the matter?" "I don't know, my leg, it hurts" "Leg? I thought you said it was your tummy" "Oh, I mean it is, but I also got a bum knee" "Mr. Mathers, the fun and games are over And just for that stunt, you're gonna get some extra homework" "But don't you wanna give me after school detention?" "Nah, that bully wants to beat your ass and I'ma let him"

Even the teacher wanted him to get his.

Tired of bein' stared at Tired of wearin' the same damn Nike Air hat

Never had to worry about that after this.

* * *

Death section:

- I tried suicide once and I'll try it again That's why I write songs where I die at the end 

- The disaster with dreads, I'm bad enough to commit suicide And survive long enough to kill my soul after I'm dead

- The ill type, I stab myself with a steel spike While I blow my brain out just to see what it feels like 'Cause this is how I am in real life I don't want to just die a normal death, I wanna be killed twice

- And if you ever see a video for this shit I'll probably be dressed up like a mummy with my wrists slit

- (I'm Slim Shady) So come and kill me while my name's hot And shoot me 25 times in the same spot

* * *

I got a wardrobe with an orange robe I'm in the fourth row, signin' autographs at your show

Tries to be unique and boastful... falls apart and gets self-deprecating.

I take a breather and sigh, either I'm high or I'm nuts 'Cause if you ain't tiltin' this room, neither am I

I mean, someone was... right?

We drive around in million-dollar sports cars While little kids hide this tape from their parents like bad report cards

Eh.

If I had a million bucks, it wouldn't be enough Because I'd still be out robbin' armored trucks

Unquenched desire for chaos.

A lyricist without a clue, what year is this? Fuck a needle, here's a sword, body pierce with this

Always able to make a risky situation dicier.

Wait, what if there's an explanation for this shit? What, she tripped, fell, landed on his dick?

Solid one liner.

Drug sickness got me doin' some bugged twitches I'm withdrawin' from crack so bad, my blood itches

/eyes pop out

I don't speak, I float in the air, wrapped in a sheet I'm not a real person, I'm a ghost trapped in a beat

Super fun hip-hop imagery.

[scottmapess]

🔴WARNING: YouTube Is SHADOW BANNING Bitcoin Videos! + PROOF Whales Buying MASSIVE Bitcoin!

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

All right. Welcome back, everybody, to all Tarquin Daily Course, you subscribe to this channel for our daily videos on everything going on in the cryptocurrency space today. A lot of exciting things to talk about in today’s video. Before I get to this, I want to spend a few minutes talking about the shadow band problem that’s happening and it’s happening to the bigger Bitcoin cryptocurrency YouTube’s. So if you put the word Bitcoin in the title or description of any of your videos doesn’t apply to the past videos, but any videos in the past few days and going forward, it seems that these videos get shadowbanned for a period of time. So we did an experiment yesterday in yesterday’s video and this video right here, we did not use the word Bitcoin or anything related in the title or description. Guess what? That video performed normally, as in, it did not get shadowbanned by YouTube. So this is 100 percent YouTube’s algorithm picking up videos that mention the word bitcoin in this video. In the video, you’re watching right now. I’m sure you’ve noticed I decided to put the word Bitcoin in the title again. I mean, it’s just SVO, our channels about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency. It hurts us if we can’t put Bitcoin in cryptocurrency in the title and description. So what this means is because the word Bitcoin is in the title, probably in a couple of hours after I released this video, I expect this video to get Shatto banned. YouTube will shadowban this video for a period of six to 12 hours, at least in our experience. But when I say shadow band, what YouTube is doing is this video will not show up in your subfield. This video will not be recommended to you and it won’t be recommended to anybody on YouTube. Even if you search the title of this video in the name of our channel. You will not be able to see this video because of the shadow band. After about 12 hours in our experience, the videos get put back to normal again. As in, they’re visible again. You can see them in yourself and feed they will be suggested. But as you can imagine, this kills all momentum. So I’ve been trying to email with YouTube premium support. They seem willing to help. But so far, they have yet to acknowledge the actual shadow banding problem. In my opinion, this is just speculation, but in my opinion, we are collateral damage. My theory is that YouTube is trying to crack down on these live stream scams and we and some of the bigger bitcoin and crypto YouTube channels are getting caught in the crossfire, unfortunately. And I’m sure you can understand. You know, as a content creator, this really hurts us. You know, we make videos so people can watch them. So YouTube shadowbanning us, you know, really hurts. Morale hurts our bottom line. Hopefully, this gets worked out soon. Do me a favour. Take two seconds. Hit the like button. Give this video a thumbs up. That’s what I need you to do. If you want to support the channel liking the video, it’s not going to stop the shadowban, but it will help us before and after the shadowban. And hopefully, our video can perform somewhere around normal. If everybody likes the video. So I wanted to clue you in as to everything that’s going on with our channel. But, you know, this is bigger than our channel. This is about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency in general. So anyway, that being said, let’s get into some recent news. The Bitcoin whale population has been spotted increasing in the wild. Whales have been in solid accumulation mode since January of 2020. That means whales started accumulating at the beginning of the year and then all through 2020. This is macro bullish. So whales are entities that hold 1000 Bitcoin or more. And you can see the data here. You can see how our wallets that are holding 1000 Bitcoin or more have been increasing since January. Now, to go further because it’s not all about the whales, right. Bitcoin supposed to be for everybody to go further. We’re seeing retail buying Bitcoin as well. So here what we’ve been seeing this all year, but this is updated data addresses holding more than one Bitcoin, reached a new all-time high again. So minnows are accumulating, too. Well, I guess one Bitcoin wouldn’t be minnows. I guess fish are accumulating as well. Anyways, at some point, people won’t be able to accumulate one bitcoin. I’m sure you realize that Bitcoin has this future person owning one whole Bitcoin is out of the question. People will just be able to stack Satoshi. I mean, owning one whole bitcoin is out of a lot of people’s reach already. But the data suggests that at. This time, people are still accumulating and reaching the threshold of one whole Bitcoin, and that’s also what Mike Novogratz is saying. Mike Novogratz, he’s a very he’s been very vocal lately about how he’s seeing hedge funds interested in buying Bitcoin. He says hedge funds are buying Bitcoin. And he says that you know, retail people are buying Bitcoin as well. And of course, you know, Mike Novogratz, he is the poster boy for former Wall Street turned crypto. He was on CNBC again just yesterday talking about two things. He talked about how people are buying Bitcoin because Bitcoin is hard money. And he talked about his moustache. What are you doing, Mike, with your portfolio besides growing a moustache? You know, I grew the moustache as my growing moustache, and I don’t want to keep it until, you know, the quarantine is over. I got I think it might be Christmas at this point, but I still am very bullish hard assets. I think there’ll be a push too hard assets. There is a very decent chance. Much higher than it was before some stagflationary or inflationary environment. And so I’m still on a lot of gold. I love Bitcoin. Next Tuesday, we have the Bitcoin having where the inflation rate gets cut in half. And so you talk about inflation and fiat currencies where the Fed is printing money like it’s a money-printing machine. And in the Bitcoin space, you know, there’s money supply gets cut 50 percent. And so big deal there. We’re seeing lots of new investors in that space, hedge funds that are buying it, not just as individual managers are buying it in their fund. I think you’ll see some announcements soon of that or, you know, investor lenders out. And so all positive stuff in terms of flow in that space is that’s where the bulk of my risk is. It’s been a fun environment in the Bitcoin space after a long desert. We now really have real activity. So, yeah, Mike Novogratz also brought up the Bitcoin, having now us all to coin daily. We will most likely be doing a live stream an hour or two going into the having. So going into this clock hits zero, we’re going to be having a little having Livestream party. And really, I hope you guys understand the magnitude of the having, in my opinion, that the having is a thousand times more significant than any AWALT coin partnership. This is a celebration of bitcoins, hard money policy and public hard money policy. And this is only the third having to ever happen. You’re going to be able to tell people in the future if you’re so inclined, you’re gonna be able to brag. I was around before the third having I stacked some CITO sheets before the third having think about it. Hardly anybody was around for Bitcoin’s first having a handful of people were around for Bitcoin. Second tapping. You know, would you consider those guys like the. Oh. In the future. You and I are gonna be consider the O’Jays. It’s gonna be a point of pride that we stacked some satoshi is before this clock struck. Zero. So that’s what I’m thinking. I’m really the link in the description to probably this tweet or maybe a tweet like this where we tagged at Team YouTube and we’re trying to nudge them to, you know, clear up this Bitcoin content censorship. So if you wanted to look in the description and just give the video a little like a little poke, a little nudge. And that’s it for me today, my friends. My name is Aaron at Old Quinn Daily. By the way, guys, make sure you’re following us on Twitter. You know, we’ve been updating everybody on Twitter about this Bitcoin censorship, you know, as new information comes out. And, you know, we also tweet and read, tweet, cool stuff like this. This is about the distribution of Bitcoin hash rate. And it’s just, you know, stuff that we’re thinking about in real-time in a lot of people. A lot of people follow us. And, you know, you should be following the people if you’re, you know, in this cryptocurrency space because you want to stay in tune and stay educated and figure out, you know, what are the good projects, whether that’s, you know, Bitcoin. I like to hear, like, what are the arguments for Bitcoin and against Bitcoin or maybe old coin projects you should be following, you know, the teams on Twitter to see what they’re about anyway. That is it for me, my friends. This is Aaron Adult Quinn Daily Cinnabar.

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning-bitcoin/ source https://cryptosharks1.blogspot.com/2020/05/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning.html

[jeffrmayhugh]

🔴WARNING: YouTube Is SHADOW BANNING Bitcoin Videos! + PROOF Whales Buying MASSIVE Bitcoin!

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

All right. Welcome back, everybody, to all Tarquin Daily Course, you subscribe to this channel for our daily videos on everything going on in the cryptocurrency space today. A lot of exciting things to talk about in today’s video. Before I get to this, I want to spend a few minutes talking about the shadow band problem that’s happening and it’s happening to the bigger Bitcoin cryptocurrency YouTube’s. So if you put the word Bitcoin in the title or description of any of your videos doesn’t apply to the past videos, but any videos in the past few days and going forward, it seems that these videos get shadowbanned for a period of time. So we did an experiment yesterday in yesterday’s video and this video right here, we did not use the word Bitcoin or anything related in the title or description. Guess what? That video performed normally, as in, it did not get shadowbanned by YouTube. So this is 100 percent YouTube’s algorithm picking up videos that mention the word bitcoin in this video. In the video, you’re watching right now. I’m sure you’ve noticed I decided to put the word Bitcoin in the title again. I mean, it’s just SVO, our channels about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency. It hurts us if we can’t put Bitcoin in cryptocurrency in the title and description. So what this means is because the word Bitcoin is in the title, probably in a couple of hours after I released this video, I expect this video to get Shatto banned. YouTube will shadowban this video for a period of six to 12 hours, at least in our experience. But when I say shadow band, what YouTube is doing is this video will not show up in your subfield. This video will not be recommended to you and it won’t be recommended to anybody on YouTube. Even if you search the title of this video in the name of our channel. You will not be able to see this video because of the shadow band. After about 12 hours in our experience, the videos get put back to normal again. As in, they’re visible again. You can see them in yourself and feed they will be suggested. But as you can imagine, this kills all momentum. So I’ve been trying to email with YouTube premium support. They seem willing to help. But so far, they have yet to acknowledge the actual shadow banding problem. In my opinion, this is just speculation, but in my opinion, we are collateral damage. My theory is that YouTube is trying to crack down on these live stream scams and we and some of the bigger bitcoin and crypto YouTube channels are getting caught in the crossfire, unfortunately. And I’m sure you can understand. You know, as a content creator, this really hurts us. You know, we make videos so people can watch them. So YouTube shadowbanning us, you know, really hurts. Morale hurts our bottom line. Hopefully, this gets worked out soon. Do me a favour. Take two seconds. Hit the like button. Give this video a thumbs up. That’s what I need you to do. If you want to support the channel liking the video, it’s not going to stop the shadowban, but it will help us before and after the shadowban. And hopefully, our video can perform somewhere around normal. If everybody likes the video. So I wanted to clue you in as to everything that’s going on with our channel. But, you know, this is bigger than our channel. This is about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency in general. So anyway, that being said, let’s get into some recent news. The Bitcoin whale population has been spotted increasing in the wild. Whales have been in solid accumulation mode since January of 2020. That means whales started accumulating at the beginning of the year and then all through 2020. This is macro bullish. So whales are entities that hold 1000 Bitcoin or more. And you can see the data here. You can see how our wallets that are holding 1000 Bitcoin or more have been increasing since January. Now, to go further because it’s not all about the whales, right. Bitcoin supposed to be for everybody to go further. We’re seeing retail buying Bitcoin as well. So here what we’ve been seeing this all year, but this is updated data addresses holding more than one Bitcoin, reached a new all-time high again. So minnows are accumulating, too. Well, I guess one Bitcoin wouldn’t be minnows. I guess fish are accumulating as well. Anyways, at some point, people won’t be able to accumulate one bitcoin. I’m sure you realize that Bitcoin has this future person owning one whole Bitcoin is out of the question. People will just be able to stack Satoshi. I mean, owning one whole bitcoin is out of a lot of people’s reach already. But the data suggests that at. This time, people are still accumulating and reaching the threshold of one whole Bitcoin, and that’s also what Mike Novogratz is saying. Mike Novogratz, he’s a very he’s been very vocal lately about how he’s seeing hedge funds interested in buying Bitcoin. He says hedge funds are buying Bitcoin. And he says that you know, retail people are buying Bitcoin as well. And of course, you know, Mike Novogratz, he is the poster boy for former Wall Street turned crypto. He was on CNBC again just yesterday talking about two things. He talked about how people are buying Bitcoin because Bitcoin is hard money. And he talked about his moustache. What are you doing, Mike, with your portfolio besides growing a moustache? You know, I grew the moustache as my growing moustache, and I don’t want to keep it until, you know, the quarantine is over. I got I think it might be Christmas at this point, but I still am very bullish hard assets. I think there’ll be a push too hard assets. There is a very decent chance. Much higher than it was before some stagflationary or inflationary environment. And so I’m still on a lot of gold. I love Bitcoin. Next Tuesday, we have the Bitcoin having where the inflation rate gets cut in half. And so you talk about inflation and fiat currencies where the Fed is printing money like it’s a money-printing machine. And in the Bitcoin space, you know, there’s money supply gets cut 50 percent. And so big deal there. We’re seeing lots of new investors in that space, hedge funds that are buying it, not just as individual managers are buying it in their fund. I think you’ll see some announcements soon of that or, you know, investor lenders out. And so all positive stuff in terms of flow in that space is that’s where the bulk of my risk is. It’s been a fun environment in the Bitcoin space after a long desert. We now really have real activity. So, yeah, Mike Novogratz also brought up the Bitcoin, having now us all to coin daily. We will most likely be doing a live stream an hour or two going into the having. So going into this clock hits zero, we’re going to be having a little having Livestream party. And really, I hope you guys understand the magnitude of the having, in my opinion, that the having is a thousand times more significant than any AWALT coin partnership. This is a celebration of bitcoins, hard money policy and public hard money policy. And this is only the third having to ever happen. You’re going to be able to tell people in the future if you’re so inclined, you’re gonna be able to brag. I was around before the third having I stacked some CITO sheets before the third having think about it. Hardly anybody was around for Bitcoin’s first having a handful of people were around for Bitcoin. Second tapping. You know, would you consider those guys like the. Oh. In the future. You and I are gonna be consider the O’Jays. It’s gonna be a point of pride that we stacked some satoshi is before this clock struck. Zero. So that’s what I’m thinking. I’m really the link in the description to probably this tweet or maybe a tweet like this where we tagged at Team YouTube and we’re trying to nudge them to, you know, clear up this Bitcoin content censorship. So if you wanted to look in the description and just give the video a little like a little poke, a little nudge. And that’s it for me today, my friends. My name is Aaron at Old Quinn Daily. By the way, guys, make sure you’re following us on Twitter. You know, we’ve been updating everybody on Twitter about this Bitcoin censorship, you know, as new information comes out. And, you know, we also tweet and read, tweet, cool stuff like this. This is about the distribution of Bitcoin hash rate. And it’s just, you know, stuff that we’re thinking about in real-time in a lot of people. A lot of people follow us. And, you know, you should be following the people if you’re, you know, in this cryptocurrency space because you want to stay in tune and stay educated and figure out, you know, what are the good projects, whether that’s, you know, Bitcoin. I like to hear, like, what are the arguments for Bitcoin and against Bitcoin or maybe old coin projects you should be following, you know, the teams on Twitter to see what they’re about anyway. That is it for me, my friends. This is Aaron Adult Quinn Daily Cinnabar.

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning-bitcoin/ source https://cryptosharks1.tumblr.com/post/617641995659313152

[heatherrdavis1]

WARNING: YouTube Is SHADOW BANNING Bitcoin Videos! PROOF Whales Buying MASSIVE Bitcoin!

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

All right. Welcome back, everybody, to all Tarquin Daily Course, you subscribe to this channel for our daily videos on everything going on in the cryptocurrency space today. A lot of exciting things to talk about in today’s video. Before I get to this, I want to spend a few minutes talking about the shadow band problem that’s happening and it’s happening to the bigger Bitcoin cryptocurrency YouTube’s. So if you put the word Bitcoin in the title or description of any of your videos doesn’t apply to the past videos, but any videos in the past few days and going forward, it seems that these videos get shadowbanned for a period of time. So we did an experiment yesterday in yesterday’s video and this video right here, we did not use the word Bitcoin or anything related in the title or description. Guess what? That video performed normally, as in, it did not get shadowbanned by YouTube. So this is 100 percent YouTube’s algorithm picking up videos that mention the word bitcoin in this video. In the video, you’re watching right now. I’m sure you’ve noticed I decided to put the word Bitcoin in the title again. I mean, it’s just SVO, our channels about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency. It hurts us if we can’t put Bitcoin in cryptocurrency in the title and description. So what this means is because the word Bitcoin is in the title, probably in a couple of hours after I released this video, I expect this video to get Shatto banned. YouTube will shadowban this video for a period of six to 12 hours, at least in our experience. But when I say shadow band, what YouTube is doing is this video will not show up in your subfield. This video will not be recommended to you and it won’t be recommended to anybody on YouTube. Even if you search the title of this video in the name of our channel. You will not be able to see this video because of the shadow band. After about 12 hours in our experience, the videos get put back to normal again. As in, they’re visible again. You can see them in yourself and feed they will be suggested. But as you can imagine, this kills all momentum. So I’ve been trying to email with YouTube premium support. They seem willing to help. But so far, they have yet to acknowledge the actual shadow banding problem. In my opinion, this is just speculation, but in my opinion, we are collateral damage. My theory is that YouTube is trying to crack down on these live stream scams and we and some of the bigger bitcoin and crypto YouTube channels are getting caught in the crossfire, unfortunately. And I’m sure you can understand. You know, as a content creator, this really hurts us. You know, we make videos so people can watch them. So YouTube shadowbanning us, you know, really hurts. Morale hurts our bottom line. Hopefully, this gets worked out soon. Do me a favour. Take two seconds. Hit the like button. Give this video a thumbs up. That’s what I need you to do. If you want to support the channel liking the video, it’s not going to stop the shadowban, but it will help us before and after the shadowban. And hopefully, our video can perform somewhere around normal. If everybody likes the video. So I wanted to clue you in as to everything that’s going on with our channel. But, you know, this is bigger than our channel. This is about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency in general. So anyway, that being said, let’s get into some recent news. The Bitcoin whale population has been spotted increasing in the wild. Whales have been in solid accumulation mode since January of 2020. That means whales started accumulating at the beginning of the year and then all through 2020. This is macro bullish. So whales are entities that hold 1000 Bitcoin or more. And you can see the data here. You can see how our wallets that are holding 1000 Bitcoin or more have been increasing since January. Now, to go further because it’s not all about the whales, right. Bitcoin supposed to be for everybody to go further. We’re seeing retail buying Bitcoin as well. So here what we’ve been seeing this all year, but this is updated data addresses holding more than one Bitcoin, reached a new all-time high again. So minnows are accumulating, too. Well, I guess one Bitcoin wouldn’t be minnows. I guess fish are accumulating as well. Anyways, at some point, people won’t be able to accumulate one bitcoin. I’m sure you realize that Bitcoin has this future person owning one whole Bitcoin is out of the question. People will just be able to stack Satoshi. I mean, owning one whole bitcoin is out of a lot of people’s reach already. But the data suggests that at. This time, people are still accumulating and reaching the threshold of one whole Bitcoin, and that’s also what Mike Novogratz is saying. Mike Novogratz, he’s a very he’s been very vocal lately about how he’s seeing hedge funds interested in buying Bitcoin. He says hedge funds are buying Bitcoin. And he says that you know, retail people are buying Bitcoin as well. And of course, you know, Mike Novogratz, he is the poster boy for former Wall Street turned crypto. He was on CNBC again just yesterday talking about two things. He talked about how people are buying Bitcoin because Bitcoin is hard money. And he talked about his moustache. What are you doing, Mike, with your portfolio besides growing a moustache? You know, I grew the moustache as my growing moustache, and I don’t want to keep it until, you know, the quarantine is over. I got I think it might be Christmas at this point, but I still am very bullish hard assets. I think there’ll be a push too hard assets. There is a very decent chance. Much higher than it was before some stagflationary or inflationary environment. And so I’m still on a lot of gold. I love Bitcoin. Next Tuesday, we have the Bitcoin having where the inflation rate gets cut in half. And so you talk about inflation and fiat currencies where the Fed is printing money like it’s a money-printing machine. And in the Bitcoin space, you know, there’s money supply gets cut 50 percent. And so big deal there. We’re seeing lots of new investors in that space, hedge funds that are buying it, not just as individual managers are buying it in their fund. I think you’ll see some announcements soon of that or, you know, investor lenders out. And so all positive stuff in terms of flow in that space is that’s where the bulk of my risk is. It’s been a fun environment in the Bitcoin space after a long desert. We now really have real activity. So, yeah, Mike Novogratz also brought up the Bitcoin, having now us all to coin daily. We will most likely be doing a live stream an hour or two going into the having. So going into this clock hits zero, we’re going to be having a little having Livestream party. And really, I hope you guys understand the magnitude of the having, in my opinion, that the having is a thousand times more significant than any AWALT coin partnership. This is a celebration of bitcoins, hard money policy and public hard money policy. And this is only the third having to ever happen. You’re going to be able to tell people in the future if you’re so inclined, you’re gonna be able to brag. I was around before the third having I stacked some CITO sheets before the third having think about it. Hardly anybody was around for Bitcoin’s first having a handful of people were around for Bitcoin. Second tapping. You know, would you consider those guys like the. Oh. In the future. You and I are gonna be consider the O’Jays. It’s gonna be a point of pride that we stacked some satoshi is before this clock struck. Zero. So that’s what I’m thinking. I’m really the link in the description to probably this tweet or maybe a tweet like this where we tagged at Team YouTube and we’re trying to nudge them to, you know, clear up this Bitcoin content censorship. So if you wanted to look in the description and just give the video a little like a little poke, a little nudge. And that’s it for me today, my friends. My name is Aaron at Old Quinn Daily. By the way, guys, make sure you’re following us on Twitter. You know, we’ve been updating everybody on Twitter about this Bitcoin censorship, you know, as new information comes out. And, you know, we also tweet and read, tweet, cool stuff like this. This is about the distribution of Bitcoin hash rate. And it’s just, you know, stuff that we’re thinking about in real-time in a lot of people. A lot of people follow us. And, you know, you should be following the people if you’re, you know, in this cryptocurrency space because you want to stay in tune and stay educated and figure out, you know, what are the good projects, whether that’s, you know, Bitcoin. I like to hear, like, what are the arguments for Bitcoin and against Bitcoin or maybe old coin projects you should be following, you know, the teams on Twitter to see what they’re about anyway. That is it for me, my friends. This is Aaron Adult Quinn Daily Cinnabar.

Via https://www.cryptosharks.net/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning-bitcoin/

source https://cryptosharks.weebly.com/blog/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning-bitcoin-videos-proof-whales-buying-massive-bitcoin

[cryptosharks1]

🔴WARNING: YouTube Is SHADOW BANNING Bitcoin Videos! + PROOF Whales Buying MASSIVE Bitcoin!

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

All right. Welcome back, everybody, to all Tarquin Daily Course, you subscribe to this channel for our daily videos on everything going on in the cryptocurrency space today. A lot of exciting things to talk about in today’s video. Before I get to this, I want to spend a few minutes talking about the shadow band problem that’s happening and it’s happening to the bigger Bitcoin cryptocurrency YouTube’s. So if you put the word Bitcoin in the title or description of any of your videos doesn’t apply to the past videos, but any videos in the past few days and going forward, it seems that these videos get shadowbanned for a period of time. So we did an experiment yesterday in yesterday’s video and this video right here, we did not use the word Bitcoin or anything related in the title or description. Guess what? That video performed normally, as in, it did not get shadowbanned by YouTube. So this is 100 percent YouTube’s algorithm picking up videos that mention the word bitcoin in this video. In the video, you’re watching right now. I’m sure you’ve noticed I decided to put the word Bitcoin in the title again. I mean, it’s just SVO, our channels about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency. It hurts us if we can’t put Bitcoin in cryptocurrency in the title and description. So what this means is because the word Bitcoin is in the title, probably in a couple of hours after I released this video, I expect this video to get Shatto banned. YouTube will shadowban this video for a period of six to 12 hours, at least in our experience. But when I say shadow band, what YouTube is doing is this video will not show up in your subfield. This video will not be recommended to you and it won’t be recommended to anybody on YouTube. Even if you search the title of this video in the name of our channel. You will not be able to see this video because of the shadow band. After about 12 hours in our experience, the videos get put back to normal again. As in, they’re visible again. You can see them in yourself and feed they will be suggested. But as you can imagine, this kills all momentum. So I’ve been trying to email with YouTube premium support. They seem willing to help. But so far, they have yet to acknowledge the actual shadow banding problem. In my opinion, this is just speculation, but in my opinion, we are collateral damage. My theory is that YouTube is trying to crack down on these live stream scams and we and some of the bigger bitcoin and crypto YouTube channels are getting caught in the crossfire, unfortunately. And I’m sure you can understand. You know, as a content creator, this really hurts us. You know, we make videos so people can watch them. So YouTube shadowbanning us, you know, really hurts. Morale hurts our bottom line. Hopefully, this gets worked out soon. Do me a favour. Take two seconds. Hit the like button. Give this video a thumbs up. That’s what I need you to do. If you want to support the channel liking the video, it’s not going to stop the shadowban, but it will help us before and after the shadowban. And hopefully, our video can perform somewhere around normal. If everybody likes the video. So I wanted to clue you in as to everything that’s going on with our channel. But, you know, this is bigger than our channel. This is about Bitcoin and cryptocurrency in general. So anyway, that being said, let’s get into some recent news. The Bitcoin whale population has been spotted increasing in the wild. Whales have been in solid accumulation mode since January of 2020. That means whales started accumulating at the beginning of the year and then all through 2020. This is macro bullish. So whales are entities that hold 1000 Bitcoin or more. And you can see the data here. You can see how our wallets that are holding 1000 Bitcoin or more have been increasing since January. Now, to go further because it’s not all about the whales, right. Bitcoin supposed to be for everybody to go further. We’re seeing retail buying Bitcoin as well. So here what we’ve been seeing this all year, but this is updated data addresses holding more than one Bitcoin, reached a new all-time high again. So minnows are accumulating, too. Well, I guess one Bitcoin wouldn’t be minnows. I guess fish are accumulating as well. Anyways, at some point, people won’t be able to accumulate one bitcoin. I’m sure you realize that Bitcoin has this future person owning one whole Bitcoin is out of the question. People will just be able to stack Satoshi. I mean, owning one whole bitcoin is out of a lot of people’s reach already. But the data suggests that at. This time, people are still accumulating and reaching the threshold of one whole Bitcoin, and that’s also what Mike Novogratz is saying. Mike Novogratz, he’s a very he’s been very vocal lately about how he’s seeing hedge funds interested in buying Bitcoin. He says hedge funds are buying Bitcoin. And he says that you know, retail people are buying Bitcoin as well. And of course, you know, Mike Novogratz, he is the poster boy for former Wall Street turned crypto. He was on CNBC again just yesterday talking about two things. He talked about how people are buying Bitcoin because Bitcoin is hard money. And he talked about his moustache. What are you doing, Mike, with your portfolio besides growing a moustache? You know, I grew the moustache as my growing moustache, and I don’t want to keep it until, you know, the quarantine is over. I got I think it might be Christmas at this point, but I still am very bullish hard assets. I think there’ll be a push too hard assets. There is a very decent chance. Much higher than it was before some stagflationary or inflationary environment. And so I’m still on a lot of gold. I love Bitcoin. Next Tuesday, we have the Bitcoin having where the inflation rate gets cut in half. And so you talk about inflation and fiat currencies where the Fed is printing money like it’s a money-printing machine. And in the Bitcoin space, you know, there’s money supply gets cut 50 percent. And so big deal there. We’re seeing lots of new investors in that space, hedge funds that are buying it, not just as individual managers are buying it in their fund. I think you’ll see some announcements soon of that or, you know, investor lenders out. And so all positive stuff in terms of flow in that space is that’s where the bulk of my risk is. It’s been a fun environment in the Bitcoin space after a long desert. We now really have real activity. So, yeah, Mike Novogratz also brought up the Bitcoin, having now us all to coin daily. We will most likely be doing a live stream an hour or two going into the having. So going into this clock hits zero, we’re going to be having a little having Livestream party. And really, I hope you guys understand the magnitude of the having, in my opinion, that the having is a thousand times more significant than any AWALT coin partnership. This is a celebration of bitcoins, hard money policy and public hard money policy. And this is only the third having to ever happen. You’re going to be able to tell people in the future if you’re so inclined, you’re gonna be able to brag. I was around before the third having I stacked some CITO sheets before the third having think about it. Hardly anybody was around for Bitcoin’s first having a handful of people were around for Bitcoin. Second tapping. You know, would you consider those guys like the. Oh. In the future. You and I are gonna be consider the O’Jays. It’s gonna be a point of pride that we stacked some satoshi is before this clock struck. Zero. So that’s what I’m thinking. I’m really the link in the description to probably this tweet or maybe a tweet like this where we tagged at Team YouTube and we’re trying to nudge them to, you know, clear up this Bitcoin content censorship. So if you wanted to look in the description and just give the video a little like a little poke, a little nudge. And that’s it for me today, my friends. My name is Aaron at Old Quinn Daily. By the way, guys, make sure you’re following us on Twitter. You know, we’ve been updating everybody on Twitter about this Bitcoin censorship, you know, as new information comes out. And, you know, we also tweet and read, tweet, cool stuff like this. This is about the distribution of Bitcoin hash rate. And it’s just, you know, stuff that we’re thinking about in real-time in a lot of people. A lot of people follow us. And, you know, you should be following the people if you’re, you know, in this cryptocurrency space because you want to stay in tune and stay educated and figure out, you know, what are the good projects, whether that’s, you know, Bitcoin. I like to hear, like, what are the arguments for Bitcoin and against Bitcoin or maybe old coin projects you should be following, you know, the teams on Twitter to see what they’re about anyway. That is it for me, my friends. This is Aaron Adult Quinn Daily Cinnabar.

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/warning-youtube-is-shadow-banning-bitcoin/