#but also have u considered a lot of trans men do not care if they experience balding. and are some might be happy that they are

[ganondorf]

posts that are like We need to support detrans people too!! like ok but just about every person i've met or seen who actually calls themselves detrans has been super transphobic so 🤷‍♂️

and like the concept of detransitioning inherently like. there's nothing wrong with that and IS something that needs support and like i could not care less if you once identified as trans and then later realized you weren't and idec if you actively Regret transitioning like. what that means to you is your business. but everyone i see who actually calls themselves detrans are always advocating for taking away the rights and happiness of Other ppl because being trans didn't work for them Personally

[genderqueerdykes]

i love you so much i love the way u talk abt trans men and our struggles i makes me feel so seen especially bc youre older than me, i want to be understood , keep posting please

THANK YOU !!

i appreciate that. i feel like nobody (aside from some very cool bloggers on here) is advocating for trans men anymore. like unless its a trans man talking about these issues, it just doesn't happen. nobody advocates on our behalf for the most part. everyone just leaves us to the weeds. we have to help each other because most people just don't even understand what trans men and mascs want. like it's absolutely positively insanity inducing

when i was in college, at my pride group, there were just. no conversations about trans men. at all. in fact. at the time i was beginning to realize i was a trans man but i couldn't find support or acknowledgement of transmasculinity anywhere. whenever i would participate in the conferences, and large group meetings for LGBTQ communities in our part of the country... I was forced into queer women's groups. i did not identify as a woman or bigender at that time. i asked them where a female-to-male genderqueer person should go, and they put me in every queer women's group. i was not being considered trans. i was being viewed as a cis butch lesbian.

i was fucking pissed.

i learned the word transgender and what it meant and the example that was given was male to female, which was informative. i heard a lot of things about feminine transition, drag queens, cis gay male culture, bisexuality, pansexuality, and even asexuality. i want you to know that my college's pride group in 2011 - 2012 was more accepting of asexual people than trans men, which is insane for that time frame. i was actually allowed to help with a presentation on asexuality

i had to go online and research trans men, though. there were none to be found in the group that were at least out and able to talk to each other. we were all very stealth and nervous. my long term friends there ended up being gay men, lesbians, and a transfem agender person. i never met a single trans man there. it was heartbreaking.

i am tired of participating in transmasculine silence. i will not participate in self-erasure. trans men are trans. we're men. we're mascs. we NEED support, community, and care. we need to learn how to access transition resources, to comfort each other, to laugh with each other, to help each other find what clothes make us feel like ourselves, to say each other's names and pronouns, to see one's self in the other.

we need people who will protect us from misgendering. we need to be able to talk about our unique issues. we need to be able to talk about how yes, we experience misogyny, but also that transandrophobia is literally a thing. we need people who will stand up for femme trans men and gay trans men. we need people who understand that it's not okay to call every single trans man a confused butch lesbian and assume that they're a queer cis woman. trans men can be butch lesbians and that's okay. but you can't rip away a trans man's manhood for the sake of being a catty asshole. it's misgendering. it's transphobia. care about being transphobic. transphobia hurts all trans people no matter where it's directed. we all lose when you opt to deny trans men and mascs the right to community.

i am transmasculine. i am a trans man. i love being a trans man. i'm not ashamed. i'm not going back in the closet. i love my transmasculine brothers and siblings. i will not silence them. silencing them is a disservice to us all. i refuse to do that to us.

thank you for sending this ask. stay safe, take care of yourself, you're an important part of the LGBTQ community, don't let anyone take that from you.

[bungoustraypups]

idk man i just really think that if u genuinely believe that fic authors are required to care about characters they dont care about and make content for characters or ships they dont care about just to prove theyre not secretly misogynists uh. i dont think you actually care about how theyre actually treating real women. because you seem to be using solely the characters they choose to write self-indulgent free fanworks about as the metric to define that instead of, yknow. anything else they do. or at least youre putting a whole lot of emphasis on it

also theres quite a few lesbians ive met who actually dont write men. some even genderbend, whether thru a cis-swap where theyre now AFAB cis women or thru trans headcanons or whatever, canonically male characters so they dont have to write about men. theyre a minority in most animanga and other mainstream fandoms ive seen but as i am not in every fandom nor am i privy to the inner workings of every fandom idk how like, rare those ppl actually are compared to authors who exclusively or mostly write abt men

also like. not sorry for this one, but as a nonbinary trans man who is not a woman even a little bit and refuses to be seen as one or associate myself with womanhood because i am not a woman, it is specifically irritating to me to be told this, because i tend to write most about the characters i project on to or see myself reflected in, and, unsurprisingly, 99% of those characters are men, or can be read as men or are men at least some of the time, or more masculine in presentation

jasper from SU has always been my favorite gem and i didn't get invested in the series until she showed up, for example, and i heavily project onto her and see my experiences in her, despite her being considered woman-aligned, which i have no problem with and am actually glad about because there's not a whole lot of very masculine/butch women in mainstream media to start with, though i wish the show had been more sympathetic with her considering she's literally an abuse victim but i digress

but i often don't write for female or fem-presenting canon characters, or focus many of my fics on them, because in order for me to really get attached to a pre-existing character not of my own creation in a series, i need to be able to see some aspect of myself in them, or they need to have something that makes me interested in their story and draws me towards them. but seeing myself reflected in a character who is a woman or identifies mostly or often as a woman is dysphoria-inducing for me. that's why most of the female characters i write for are my own OCs, because i created them, which means a little piece of me goes into them, which means i'm able to have that connection i often lack with canon characters. i also tend to make the most content for characters i feel attracted towards, who are always men because i'm gay lmao

like i'm not misogynistic or a misogynist. i don't hate women. it's just that between my writing process and the canon characters my brain gets attached to, when i write fic, i write about the canon characters i care about the most, who most often tend to be men because i'm mostly in fandoms of male character-dominated series where the women are either uninteresting, poorly written, or extremely minor, or all three in the worst case scenario. and since i do this for fun, i'm not gonna waste my time writing something i'm not 100% passionate about just because there's a lack of f/f and women-centric content like

that's a problem! but it's a problem that can be just as easily fixed by the people who are demanding more content themselves if they, yknow, actually made some. which a lot of them don't

[butchviking]

i dont understand how conservative desire for single sex spaces differs from feminist reason. i understand that conservatives typically think of trans people as gay plus, sure, but like. in the actual desire for single sex spaces, what difference does it make

the difference it makes is in the bills they push through and the lack of care or provision for the fallout of those bills. if conservatives were pushing through a bill that said all use of mens/womens bathrooms, shelters, changing rooms, etc should be decided on birth sex alone - what are they putting in place to enable that? birth sex is not something stated on legal documents, bc legal sex can be changed. so how does one prove their sex? what happens to transmen who pass as male? i don't think most women are going to be happy with them coming into female spaces. how do they prove that that's actually where they're legally required to be? and what DOES happen to transwomen who pass as female and are forced to use male spaces? that IS dangerous for them and i understand its not the job of feminism to care about that issue but i personally do. and people can say "well this issue doesn't affect passing trans people bc no-one will ever know" but that only works if the person is completely stealth, which not every passing trans person is. and hell, what about passing butches?? how do THEY prove they're women if we know ID doesnt always reflect birth sex? all these people are just collateral damage to conservatives and i'm not okay w that.

ok. i will level with u. thats me making smthn up on the fly to justify my position. it didnt go very well at first so i gave up, but then i thought on it some more nd went back to it and i think that response does stand on its own now. at first i kind of thought "well, i guess this is the one issue we DO pretty much agree on" but the way conservatives do things is still always going to leave a lot of people caught in the middle and they definitely don't care enough to make sure those people are considered in their lawmaking.

however. u know the real answer? like the instinctive gut answer? because i dont fucking trust them. i dont fucking trust them and i dont trust them bc ive seen OTHER shit theyve pulled in this vein. like the anti-transition bills that have given no consideration to people who are ALREADY transitioning and would suddenly cut off their hrt or blockers if they don't meet the new requirements; like the bill against gender non-conformity in public spaces sold to the public as being about protecting children from predators within drag communities; like the combination of the attempt to reclassify authorising a child to transition as a sexual abuse with the introduction of the death penalty for sexual abuse. i do not fucking trust them and i know they do not have womens or childrens interests at heart i know this all just comes from them finding transgenderism degenerate and i do not think any good can come from supporting them bc they are always trying to slip smthn in under the radar they are always presenting laws to the public as one thing but wording them just right so that they actually have a whole different effect than people expected.

also, as a sort-of sidenote: given that regular ass people don't actually vote on laws, just elect people to do that, what would supporting their bills actually mean? voting for conservatives who will pass anti-gay anti-trans anti-woman pro-gender laws in the hope that they also throw a "oh and womens spaces for women only" in there? promoting the politicians who proposed the bills? i guess there's contacting state representatives and asking them to vote yes or no on a specific bill, but i get the impression most people don't really do that and more just make a public show of support for such-and-such a bill, which also promotes the party and the politician.

[faithlesbian]

whats ur headcanon for post-transition angel like looks and fashion wise also do u think she voice trains TELL ME EVERYTHING IVE NEVER SEEN A TRANSFEM ANGEL HEADCANON B4 SO COOL

yk what this ask has cheered me up so much YES lets talk trans angel!!

okay so i made a post a while ago lamenting the machofication of angel across ats including the disappearance of all the silk/velvet/jewellery she wore earlier on so that's my first basis for her femme-presenting fashion sense. i think she'd still stick to a gothier colour palette though, lots of dark reds and purples, and i think she'd have a more practical everyday wardrobe for demon fighting so nothing too fancy, trousers more than skirts etc. BUT i have a very soft spot in my heart for Angel wearing maxi skirts, corset tops, blouses with those elbow-length droopy sleeves -- stuff that's reminiscent of what women wore when she was alive, that she finally gets to wear now. oh also!! part of my original Trans Angel Reading evidence was that she only seems to cut her hair short when she absolutely needs to to blend in with human society -- whenever its socially acceptable for men to have long hair (slash when she stops caring altogether while living in the sewers) its long, so i think she'd start growing her hair out again as soon as she came out. my caveat to this is PLEASE imagine your own actually decent long hair angel look bc all those wigs were So bad.

i like that u brought up voice training bc ive never considered that before for her but i Have noticed many times that angel really doesnt have the low gravelly voice typically required for macho male leads, and it stands out especially in contrast to other shows of the genre and era like dean's voice in supernatural is So much lower than the actors is naturally sometimes, and thats quite common. Angel by contrast has such a... idk Small voice sometimes, like in the s2 finale in Pylea when the villagers are like wehey we love you now make this ritual sacrifice for us! and the ritual sacrifice is fred and angels like "... you want me to kill her?😥" so in conclusion im not sure about that one. maybe she'd feel like she didnt need to change her voice at all?

i also like the idea that since the average height has gone up a lot since the 1700s its majorly helped with Angel's dysphoria. she used to be considered way tall even for a man but now she's just a taller than average woman :D

[poems-of-a-lover]

This is in regards to that post you made today, about anon messages. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and I don't really know where to turn.

Basically, I was born into a very controlling religion, probably borderline cult known as Jehovah's Witnesses. They believe they have the "truth", and that they need to remain separate from the "world" as Jesus supposedly commanded because the end/apocalypse could come at any time and they need to stay away from Satan.

I'm 17 now, about to start my last year of high school this fall and I'm a gay trans man (very much not to the knowledge of my family). My best friend since sixth grade is also trans, and I'm surrounded by lots of queer people (I live in a more accepting area/state). Thankfully, my parents were not in the position to homeschool my siblings and I, even though they had been considering it.

However, all these details lead me to a fork in the road.

A principle of this religion's foundation is preaching the "good news", from the youngest age a person is at any sort able to participate, spending their Saturday mornings every week going around neighborhoods and attempting to convert any and everyone they can.

I've been struggling along for the last 5-7 years or so since I mentally fell out of the religion's traps. However, once I turn 18 I have to commit myself to the religion, which I am in no favor of doing so.

Counting down the months, I find myself stuck in what direction to go, come out to my family (not in the queer sense yet, but rather just saying I don't believe in it anymore) and risk losing them entirely, or stay stuck in a place that is making every attempt to subdue and oppress me into a pretty, feminine, docile girl. I'll lose my mind if I have to stay in here any longer than I absolutely have to, but I don't know how to leave.

I'll turn 18 before I graduate, and I don't know what will happen past then. How do I take care of legal documents, doctors, college, those sorts of things (that part is largely rhetorical). My best friend has offered to take me in if/when I need it, and I think he said his parents/living-in family was alright with it (he's told them about me and my living situation), but I don't want to burden him cause he has his own issues--that's the same reason I'm writing this to you rather than asking him for help/advice again.

I hope you can find it in you read all of that, I'm sorry its so long but I felt it was necessary to fully explain it all. Also I wanted to thank you for your blog, I know there's not really any point to that but it's nice to read and see when I'm feeling down, it helps me feel validated in my identity. Have a good day/night/whatever's going on.

first off, im so, sorry that ur stuck in a position like this. u shouldn't have to be stuck in that type of position with those outcomes and those losses, and i really hope ur able to get out of there safely soon. i know it seems like it might be a burden on ur friend to take up his offer, like ur imposing or taking advantage or whatever reason, but if that's the safest option, i definitely recommend it. at least until ur able to come up with a more permanent/long term plan, it's good to have a safe place with people who respect u. ofc i don't know what it's like to be in a religious family like that, so my advice is from the perspective of someone who doesn't know it firsthand, but i feel like forcing urself to ignore ur identity for the sake of someone else's beliefs and comfortability will just cause more harm than good. i do hope ur able to live ur life the way u want, without having to water down or oppress ur identity for the sake of others. it will get better, maybe not now or soon, but eventually. if u ever need to talk about anything else, my inbox is always available for things like this!! and im so glad u find comfort in my blog, ive gotten that from a few ppl actually, that seeing queerness and loving men in a positive and safe light is helpful. again, if u ever need anything, my inbox is open <3

[unsafe-chikku]

I have sort of mixed feelings on the whole “brony” thing bc I was deep in the paint of all that (pre-egg-crack tho so a slightly different perspective) from 2012-2016 ish)

I think it’s extremely important to note I don’t like the term or the origins of it all now, and if I met someone today who still used the label I’d keep a close eye on them bc many who do are in the 4chan bigot crowd.

However, It is interesting to dissect my experience a bit with this weirdness though.

But even way back then when I’d get defensive of “fellow bronies” 😒 I had to always admit that many sucked ass.

Since it had origins in 4chan lots of ppl who were in it were just absolute bigots and the worst ppl you can meet. I knew that in 2012 and I know it even better now.

The high defensiveness of their masculinity bc of enjoyment of a little girl demographic show lead to a lot of the worst behavior I’ve ever seen in a fan space. I think this also explains the abnormal hyper sexuality they inserted into the space.

Sure, R34 is a thing and I honestly really don’t care what ppl are making/into as long as it’s tagged properly away from kids/ppl who don’t wanna see it. It’s usually drawings/fics/ect made by a guy with max ten to fifty followers, who give a shit. Pointing it out gives more attention to it and makes more of it appear in my experience.

But the sheer volumes made and extreme lack of self awareness or in some cases just irrational vitriol about properly tagging nsfw shit…well there’s a reason the sane members scrambled to do Safe Search Roundups once a month to eliminate as much fetish/nsfw content as they could from Google safe search.

My mixed part of the feelings is that me and many others involved in all that became leftists and realized we were queer.

Bc having an online community where the common theme is “I am not being a Man in the correct way and it makes me very cool” is atttactive to ppl who are either “men” (nope!) or ppl who secretly/unknowingly want to be men but not like the cishet assholes in their lives, or just ppl who felt weird about cishet gender and sexuality in general.

(if you asked 2013 me if I was trans, I would have 100% believed when I told u I was a cisgender girl if I even knew that term then. Likely not lol.)

And I had a lot of great experiences with ppl in the community too. It legitimately helped me get out of the culty evangelical mindset I had been born and brainwashed into.

I even had a group I met with irl in college and no one there was more weird than me as ppl going to a private conservative Christian school afaik.

(One guy went on to go somewhat viral for making a really convincing Rayman smash leak years ago lol.)

Anyways, I just wish it hadn’t been through something that started on 4chan and was called “brony” (inherently alienating and sexist bc the idea is to pull away from the feminine while also co-opting it) and had a lot of pure bastard folks at the Peak of it (late season 1 through season 3).

I don’t even mean the nsfw stuff (though again that was abnormally rampant) since that exists for everything- I mean just honest to god so many bronies were just fucking bigoted assholes who considered it their god given right to post untagged porn and say racist shit and be sexist as hell.

However imo “brony” really became a huge misnomer after the Princessification of Twilight. A huge chunk of the original 4chan weirdo crowd fucked off, and even more after Equestria Girls, and it kept bleeding after that as more sane, queer and chill fans became more active.

This allowed the sane, queer, and chill fans to thrive in a smaller community with less scrutiny on them from outside and fewer loud assholes flaming their flutterdash fics.

It really was just “mlp fans” by season 6 or 7 but the original name was stuck for a while after that sadly.

At this point, those remaining mostly recognized the show for what it was-a well made show about tiny horses made to sell plastic horses to kids, especially little girls, and engaged with it that way.

It was actually fairly fun especially by 2016. I lost interest in late 2017 but the fond memories I have are mostly that era.

I’m so glad that the brony label is dead and mlp is back in the hands of sane, chill, and queer creators and fans.

[slowpokedragon]

try listening to the actual trans women who having been saying for so long now it hurts them and is not helpful for their community to keep pretending they are the single most oppressed and threatened and weakest community in the entire queer population and every one else needs to defer our fear and victimization and needs to theirs. "trans women have always had it worse" if this was true wouldn't trans women also have the highest rates of sexual assault, which they dont? or the highest rates of suicide, which they also dont? wouldnt they have no platform to speak about their struggles, which they absolutely do have? stop pretending to care abt trans women so you can whiteknight and self demean yourself and so many other trans and otherwise queer people. she isnt gonna fuck you cuz you pretend her life is the most horrible way to live in the history of humanity.

ok first of all relax lmao. i am not trying to whiteknight or anything. i am happily married (and it says so in my bio! imagine that, reading a quick little blurb before you send messages like this in someones inbox), and the fact that you immediately assume that i am trying to, idk, get something from trans women instead of thinking, "hey, maybe this person is just misinformed!" says a LOT abt you.

second of all ik my knowledge of the oppression transfems face is surface level, and ik that solidarity is the most important thing overall. i originally even got all these asks bc i was complaining in the tags of a diff post that i feel like transandrophobia is a divisive term that causes more harm than it solves BECAUSE it makes an "us v them" mentality instead of, oh idk, helping us all stand in solidarity of our experiences?

maybe dont jump down a strangers throat and assume shit that isnt true, pal. all ive done is talk abt the things ive seem transfems talk abt, which is the struggles they face and how they get no benefits from either passing or not; ik that trans men only get superficial benefits to passing as cismale, and i also know that i accidentally divorced race from the topic and acknowledged my mistake in the notes of that ask. (ie trans men getting shit from cops bc they pass as a man of color, etc.)

so, you know. have u considered that i am perhaps someone who does actually care abt trans women and is trying to help the only way i know how + the issue wasnt even originally abt that? have u considered that not everybody can be the worlds most well read person on queer discourse, and that some people can be stupid and wrong even when theyre trying to help? you talk about solidarity but then spit in my face for making a couple mistakes. but hey, solidarity only exists for ppl who do everything perfect the first time, i guess? god forbid somebody have struggles w assimilating info correctly! god forbid somebody (gasp) make MISTAKES in their solidarity and support!

ive also got my own thoughts on statistics, and how often things go underreported bc going to the cops literally doesnt help like ever, and how often statistics of queer ppls experiences are incorrect, but w/e. anyway, come off anon next time if youre really so certain of yourself.

[ileaveclawmarks]

thank you for the very sweet response, it’s definitely immeasurably worse when other dykes reflect lesbophobic shit at you or otherwise project their own insecurities regarding their lesbianism onto you. this girl had also told me she kind of felt butch/femme roles were “reductive” so i guess it figures but of course it still hurts and makes me feel stupid. i think there’s just a sect of femme dykes who haven’t properly dealt with their own internalized shit and as a result end up projecting a lot of that onto mascs/butches… so i really have to thank you too for being so candid about your desire and love for us. seriously

Really quick, my thoughts on the butch femme discourse: u can really only consider it to be “reductive” if u believe that masculine women = men. Like i know that there can be a lot of nuance to this topic when it comes down to individuals, u cant deny that hetero porn and dynamics influence us to such a pervasive degree that there must be some lesbians out there who do emulate it in their sex lives. But at the end of the day if ur gonna equate butch femme to heterosexuality then ur coming at it with the belief that butches are men, want to mimic men, and draw their character from men. Simply not true especially since butches r some of the most anti-men people u will ever meet (obvi trans men may have a different relationship with this but ultimately the trans men and transmascs i know + luv are generating their own sense of what it means to be a man, not what im talking about above). And in the same breath ur saying that femme lesbians want to be the subject of male-esque objectification and relationship dynamic.

However. Just like u said, a lot of femmes r so ensconced in patriarchal practices that they can lose their bearing on what this is all about. I personally cant stand the whole “femmes perform femininity in a lesbian way/not for men but for women/u can tell when a feminine woman is a lesbian because she does femininity ~differently~” sort of thing. Im sure uve seen this rhetoric before in some way or another. Its bullshit. Femininity is femininity, full stop. Men dont care who ur wearing ur short skirt and pink platforms and cherry earrings and waxed fckin baby legs for as long as youre obeying their rules. And you are. I mean, we r lesbians for fucks sake but ur perceived sense of beauty still rests upon the standards of men as a crutch. once u realize this its easy to see how some of them might never really get over that internalized shit … if thats whats in ur head as a femme lesbian how r u gonna be able to understand and interpret ur relationship with a true dyke? How r u gonna know what she wants from u?

Obviously i still have a lot of life experience ahead of me and a lot more understanding to do but it took me a really long time to realize who and what exactly i was put on earth to love and appreciate, and even then ive never felt desire for anything or anyone but dykes + butches. I couldnt pretend otherwise if i tried. So to me the candidness comes easily … if that makes sense. I wish i could extend the sentiment 2 u and all other masculine lesbians whove been hurt by someone elses internalized conditioning. Im glad u know my feelings r sincere

[multiples-fandomswontkillme]

~Metal Family headcanons~

These are like my... general hcs)? which means I didn't include my main hc that Glam, Ches and Vicky are polyamorous, married and started dating after Glam met Vicky, and absolutely everything that implies for the kids and the relationships between each member of the fam. Maybe I'll make a separate post for that or maybe not! Who knows lkfwnlfqnf

Glam

Bisexual

Glam has constant nightmares and ocasional night terrors ever since he ran away home and is an active sleep walker. Ches helped him through the worse ones when they were younger, and learned how to deal with them, always preferring not to wake him up but being with him until the episode passed. Vicky has learned how to deal with them, though she normally asks Ches for advice with it cuz she comes out short sometimes.

He has PTSD. I bet it's diagnosed too, he takes medication and goes to therapy, it doesn't mean he still doesn't have his bad days anyway. He's trying to get better.

Glam has talked to Vicky about his past, his father and his family. This is a direct contradiction of Alina's confirmation that Glam doesn't talk about it with anyone but man FUCK THAT. We love good communication in this house, Vicky tries her best to help him, but there's only so much she can do to help.

Glam enjoys gardening, cooking and making models, he also likes doing his make up, painting his nails and dressing up in fancy, extravagant clothes even if he has nowhere important to go.

He likes taking care of everyone's hair, and constantly helps Vicky brush her hair cuz there's so much of it, Dee when he gets stressed over how tangled it can get, buys Ches hair products so he actually takes care of it, and chases Heavy so the kid actually washes, untangles and brushes his hair.

This one is kind of weird, but I refuse to think any adult in the family is unarmed at any time. Glam owns a taser and pepper spray. They're bright pink and sparkly.

This man cried his eyes out while watching Coco. He's hell to watch movies with cuz he talks and predicts what's gonna happen during the movie, judges them with scores at the end and all.

Vicky

Also bisexual!

Vicky's the one who does everyone's laundry most of the time. She prefers it that way since she's the only one that knows how to wash their black clothes so the colors stay vibrant. (This is based on my gf shaming everyone but Vicky cuz their black clothes always look so muted and almost gray, but Vicky's whole outfit is always the same vibrant black colors, so we decided that neither Glam or the kids know how to wash dark clothes)

She has anger issues, if it isn't obvious. I think she also has PTSD, mainly survivor's guilt due to her surviving the accident her brother died in. She blames herself and cannot bear to talk about it, in some sort of deep denial. If she can't remember, it can't hurt as much, right?

She has scars on the right side of her back and her hip, from the road rash she got on her brother's accident, she never treated it due to grief and it scarred badly. Apart from that, the scar of the caesarean section from Heavy's birth. She doesn't really mind both of them, they happened, nothing to do about them.

She likes watching boxing competitions, brawling matches and motorcycle repairing on TV. Loves doing BBQ's and going to the pool. Also an enjoyer of teasing her kids, kissing and loving her husband at random times, spending time drinking and bonding with Ches and bragging about her family and punching anyone who thinks they're not that cool.

Not particularly a fan of make up, skirts and dresses or any traditionally femenine-perceived stuff. But has been making exceptions due to Glam and Ches being unashamed of being seen as femenine, and actually rocking the looks. The internalized misogyny is kind of slowly dissapearing.

Apart from the guns she carries in each arm (I mean her biceps, have you looked at the size of those?? She strong) she has brass knuckles on her at all times. Glam gifts her new ones sometimes, she loves having multiple choices to punch people teeth in.

Loves horror, thrillers and action movies. Falls asleep during rom-coms and dramas. Ironically, loves gossip and talking shit about people. Enjoys hearing Ches talks about the gossip going on in the nursery home even if she doesn't know who the hell he's talking about.

Rest of the family under the cut!

Heavy

Heavy is a trans boy! He doesn't know his sexuality yet though, he's still figuring himself out. When he's older, i think he definitely dated some men but had better luck with girls.

Heavy has had innocent crushes on some girls on his class before, but they never turn into anything more cuz he's not the best at expressing himself. He follows the bother-the-girl-to-death-until-she-hates-you gimmick, and unsurprisingly, it doesn't work.

I'm sorry to break this to u but Heavy totally had an among us phase, and uses so much reddit and twitch slang... You know he does.

Likes bullying and teasing his brother to death. You know that when Dee had his first romance, Heavy was ALL up in his business being a tease and a bad attempt at a wingman. He means well tho.

He's not squeamish at all. Also has great pain resistance. This kid has picked cockroaches with his bare hands and loves cats, of course the cats have scratched him. He's tough!

Grows up to be the charming himbo he was always destined to be.

Dee

I hc him as demisexual. Kind of inherited his dad's tastes for the takes no crap, intimidating but pretty kind of people.

Can't cook. He tries but he can only do basics like rice, cereal, chicken nuggets or eggs. Complicated meals always burn or don't taste like anything at all. It drives him crazy.

Dee was a quiet and very well behaved toddler before Heavy was born. He never threw tantrums or got whims. After Heavy was born though, and despite the fact he understood his brother was small and needed special care, he started craving attention often and cried and got mad at little things. Typical jealousy of the oldest sibling.

The first time Dee fell in love with someone, he didn't recognize it was love at first. He just thought his interest on the person was born out of curiosity and aesthetic attraction, but as soon as he realized he seeked validation and companionship, that he liked seeing them smile, that he wanted to protect them, that he yearned for more time alone with them and that he wanted more than what just a simple friendship implied, it was an instant 'oh hell no'. He wanted those feelings to get the hell away, but unfortunately, they were there to stay.

Canonically likes MLP, psychological and horror anime like Death note and Hellsing, so I'm deciding he also watched Death Parade, had a FNAF phase, is very into The Walten Files. This guy enjoys any kind of specially dark ARG's and knows a ton of lore of real crime, unsolved cases, ghost appearances and other stuff. Doesn't believe in the supernatural, but sure is entertained by it.

He's a mess at romance. Flirting? His attempts at compliments are hardly flattering. Giving gifts? The best he can manage is jewelry and you can kind of tell he asked his dad for help. Dates? He's so nervous he's silent for most of it, but begins getting comfortable and having fun if his partner really knows how to get him down from his negativity cloud.

Ches

Pansexual.

He's very good with kids. He has the patience of a saint and he's laid-back, chill and fun but still is an authority figure who knows how to put limits. Sure, he's gonna let the kids light up a house on fire BUT hey, now they know everything about fire precautions, burns and how to treat them AND how to get away with arson. What an educational evening, am I right?

Due to certain info from the "Goodbye" official comic, I headcanon Ches as depressed. I don't want to elaborate a lot 'cuz of spoilers, but... God, everything related to his mom fucking hurts, man. How did he deal with all that?

Ches has been Dee and Heavy's babysitter so many times he cannot count them with all his fingers. He learned how to put those kids to sleep almost immediately (Sing Bon Jovi's "This ain't a love song" and any cheesy love song in a slow lullaby style and they're out), which movie were their favorite as kids (Heavy loved 'Monsters Inc.' and Dee never looked away during 'Meet the Robinsons'), how to console them after nightmares (Heavy needed reassurance, sweet words, and to be with someone until he fell asleep again. Dee just had to be tucked in, get his nightlight turned on and kissed in the forehead). He practically raised those kids along with Vicky and Glam.

More than once, Dee and Heavy have slipped and called Ches "Dad". Ches immediately gets his shit eating grin on and answers "Yes, son?" and does a couple of dad jokes just to mess and embarrass them. He's actually very flattered and surprised at how proud of himself he is for being a father figure to both kids.

Has a scar on the left side of his forehead due to a bottle his mom threw at him when he was younger, around the time he met Glam. He hates the scar with passion, it's a permanent reminder of the fact she never cared, that's why he always keeps it covered with his headband. Gets sad about it sometimes.

Ches likes to spend his time with a group of grannies of the nearby nursing home. He genuinely considers them his friends and gossips and hangs out with all of them on weekends. Bingo, billiards, walks in the park, soap opera marathons, you name it. I even designed them, gave them names and backstories... God, i just love the concept too much. I'll make some art about Ches and his granny gang FOR SURE, you're NOT ready for them.

Carries a pocket knife on him at all times. This man grew up on a bad neighborhood and absolutely knows how to defend himself, he can be intimidating when he wants to be and will pose a threat if needed. He's fucking terrifying when genuinely mad. Just cause he looks harmless doesn't mean he is, darling.

That would be all!

[satanfemme]

hey. i'm thinking of doing my top too but i am: scared and also: worried. how did u know you wanted it?

As a heads up, I'm gonna give you a different answer than what most other trans men are going to tell you about top surgery. ime, most men describe it as necessary, to relieve painful dysphoria, etc. which I'm sure are reasons you've heard before! but just know going into this response that ur gonna get something a lil unusual! thank u

so at the time I received top, I was 18-19 (decided I wanted to go forward it at 18, received it 2 months into being 19), tho ofc I'd already fantasized about it for years at that point too. I also identified as "just" nonbinary at that point, preferred they/them pronouns, and wanted to be fully androgynous in a genderless sort of way.... ironic considering how androgynous in a gender-FULL way I am now hdfjhgdfgfg. but! importantly, I also didn't experience dysphoria!!!!! + I still don't!

I did experience "social dysphoria", but since this was fully in relation to how others were treating me, rather than my actual body or some kind of internal angst, I never felt comfy calling it dysphoria. this is especially relevant in the case of surgery ofc, because I never had a moment where I saw my breasts pre-top and felt miserable over them or anything. no crying in the mirror moments for me, not over this, sorry. like, I've joked on here before about how I prefer being topless/nude whenever in private? well this was completely true pre-top as well, I was constantly tits out a lot of the time and this simply wasn't a problem for me. ffs I was too lazy to bind at ALL in the months leading up to my surgery, and didn't own bras post-middle school. so I was literally counting down the days til my breasts would be removed, while also just kinda letting them do whatever they wanted under my shirt anyway cause I couldn't be bothered. my "problem" with them was only that others would misgender me, whether they knew my pronouns/gender or not. so I wanted to find ways to masculinize myself somewhat, top surgery was one of those ways.

but that's only half the reason ofc! when I refer to transition related surgery as "plastic surgery" I'm only half kidding, because tho I know most others wouldn't label it that way, this is genuinely how I see it personally. idk whether or not I'd have gone thru with it just for strangers to read me a certain way, but it doesn't matter cause in reality a lot of my motivation was internally driven.... in that: I thought it'd look cute 💁‍♂️. u know when you're a kid and you imagine your ideal adulthood self? for me I would imagine a very genderless body, while I played with gothic fashion over it. wrt the former I'd imagine a flat chest, no visible genitalia under my bush, a general twink-y look. and I even briefly considered not getting nipple grafts, to contribute to this fully neutrois, almost inhuman, aesthetic. (my primary gender identities at the time were "neutrois" and "angel" to give u a better taste of the vibes here). but like I said, this wasn't in any way an angst to me, but rather thoughts I had in the same vein as when people casually wish their jawline was a "better" shape, their hair was shinier, or that they had a different eye color or something. u know what I mean? in some ways, I was even a little sad about losing my breasts (pre-top, never post), because I thought they were very cute too! just not cute for my ideal persona 🤷‍♂️.

anyway those were my two reasons, which in my mind at the time weren't even "how do I know I want it" as much as "lol I want it". and I type this out in so much detail on purpose cause like... so much has changed for me since then! I no longer care how others gender me 90% of the time (the exceptions are when my bio family does it, or if I feel the need to be stealth out of safety, like in men's rooms or prev workplaces). I also have a completely different view of my gender now! I'm a femme man :-) I'm still nonbinary, but not in the sense that I'm "neutral". rather, in the sense that I'm everything when I want to be :-)!!! in the years since my top surgery, I've also realized I have DID and psychosis, which greatly influence my gender, and basically guarantee that it'll continue to change over time.

and to conclude: I don't regret the surgery at all!! I LOVE having top surgery I LOVE having stretched out DI scars and I LOVE my hyperpigmented scarred nipples and I LOVE being flat! to be frank, I made this decision as a fucked up and impulsive teenager in the midst of a psychotic episode, with 0 self awareness nor even the healthy amount of pre-surgery anxiety/contemplation -- AND IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST DECISIONS OF MY LIFE! I don't know if these anecdotes help you, and I can not decide for you whether you "should" get top surgery or not. but these are the realities of my transition, and I like being able to offer this perspective for anyone who doesn't connect with the stereotypical ones. cause in my mind, after seeing both "sides" of our oppression claim that you can't make these decisions while mentally ill, or you can't make these decisions on frivolous impulse, or you can't make these decisions when young - lest you regret it for the rest of your life - the heart of my story here is truly "fuck that -- BODY AUTONOMY FOR ALL!"

and I'm very proud of that :-)

[7fckingidiots]

Would you be alright with writing some HCs about the brothers and a MC who's a trans guy? Sorry if it's a tall order or too vague, they're a big comfort for me and I'd like to see what ideas you have bcs your headcanons are fantastic ;w;

HELL YEAH DUDE!!!! IM ALSO TRANS!!! AH!!!!! demigirl rights :3 but i also find a huge comfort in the boys and i hc all of them as trans because no one can Stop Me •• but i really hope you enjoy these and remember you’re valid and i care u so much! Also i hope you don’t mind but i kinda made it gender neutral so every trans folk could enjoy!

The Brothers With A Trans MC

Lucifer

He didn’t know until you came out to him honestly. He knew all his other siblings were trans but with all the work Diavolo gave him and adding new students from different realms on top of that he hadn’t really had time to notice any minor changes in you.

He feels guilty about this and immediately makes sure(like everyone else)to ask for your pronouns, name, and how you would like to present yourself from now on.

Fixes your ID cards and your papers with Diavolo right after dinner

God. He’s such a dad and he gets you things that have your new name on them. You wake up to see you have a new pencil case with your name embroidered on it with matching pencils. God.....he’s so weird i love him so much

Asmo does most of your clothing shopping but for formal wear he takes you shopping! He’s not about to buy you some cheap tux or gown ok it’s gonna be over 2000 grim and he’s gonna get you three of them STOP HIM

He’s not the best with verbal affection so he writes down notes that are like “you looked very handsome/pretty today.” or when he first starts writing them they’re like “you’re a boy/girl/kid. i’m proud of you.” Thank u mr morningstar

You want surgery or to start hormones??? He will stop all his work with Diavolo and spend forever looking up things for you, he wants you to be as safe as possible(pls he almost fainted after he realized you’d have to give yourself a shot like everyday dhdhdhjdhd hc that demons/angels don’t have to do hormone therapy i’m so JEALOUS)

Practices saying your pronouns in his study when you first come out. He just wants to make sure you feel as safe as possible in his care(and he remembers how terrible it felt to be misgendered)

Guess what....he loves you no matter what :)

Mammon

You’re blind as hell if you couldn’t see his top scars but I respect it

King DOES slip up on your pronoun change but always immediately corrects himself. Satan has a spray bottle that he sprays Mammon with when he does it. Mammon is NOT amused but the same can’t be said for Belphie.

Gender affirming activities??? Oh yeah like robbing a bank?? That’s pretty gender neutral and trans right?? Yeah!!! Wow such a good supportive brother.

If you want you can wear the formal wear Lucifer bought you to the said bank heist. Boom trans rights

You can practice painting his nails or doing his makeup if you’re too nervous to do it on yourself first!! Dw if it’s bad he also can’t do makeup or paint nails so once you let him return the favor you’re both laughing and Asmo is distraught.

KING at dying hair he will get you whatever you need and if you want an entire different hair cut entirely he’s ON it

Very used to being Loud and Brash but if you need someone to talk to about anything really he always calms down and sits down to listen to whatever you have to say.

Lots of gendered gifts from him. This said for men??? Oh ok adds to cart. Oh pink??? For ladies??? yeah that can go in there too

You’re never gonna believe this.....But he loves you and supports you :)

Levi

He was the first one to come out to you at the house!! He was just so excited! Same hat!!!

Gets literally any video game where you can design the protag/have custom pronouns and will play games like that with you for hours

Would you like a pride flag.....for u.....He has too many.....Please take the trans flag please he has no room....he bought in bulk for a pride event and didn’t consider the consequences of his actions

Miku binder but irl. He will get if for you but unironically.....thanks King. He just likes binders with patterns and i respect IT

Dysphoria?? He gives you his hoodie bc that was his trademark dysphoria hoodie and i GUESS for you he can share............he would give u anything just ask nicely he’s sensitive

Reads any character that matches up with your gender and is like!!!!! That’s you!!!! OMG!!!! You in da IRL

Goes back and edits his tweets if they use your old name or pronouns(also has he/they in his bio. this is for nothing just makes me :D)

If you haven’t chosen your name he’s gonna suggest so many fictional characters. POV levi kin assigns you.

You listen to music together that just has Trans Vibes.....maybe u cry together but there’s no judgment!! It’s just nice :)

God it’s wild but! He loves u and thinks ur great :)

Satan

Enby Satan. That’s all :)

He’s very quite about it, he supports you! He’s just not loud like his brothers

He brings you book about gender studies and LGBTQ history that he thinks would interest you(there some of his favorite books and they’ve made him feel the most comfortable in his gender)

Gives you a name list if you haven’t named yourself yet! He cares about you and wants to make sure you have the right name that suits you

He’s the one that tells you that it’s ok if you’re still figuring it all out, learning about yourself is a very tricky process and if anyone knows that it’s Satan

Any of the brothers would kill anyone who misgendered you but with Satan that shit is ON SIGHT

Asks you how you know and what were the signs that gave it away to you, but only if you’re comfortable telling him!! He just finds everyone’s experience interesting and would like to know yours as well.

Spells for fucking DAYS Satan personally kills body dysphoria the best he can(mainly bc he’s HIGHKEY afraid of you getting surgery he hates knives so much)

Makes your comfort food for you when you’re feeling down about yourself and will read whatever you want to hear outloud to you.

!!!!!! GET THIS !!!!!! He loves YOU :0

Asmo

Fucking excited!!!! This means you two are going to buy so much clothing together and he gets to style you let’s GO

Buys you whatever you want but he will make you try it all on so be CAREFUL what u wish for.....ur gonna be there till the store closes yeah......

Paints your nails with the trans pride flag!! Also does your makeup and gives you tips on how to look more masculine or fem!!

VOICE LESSONS

He will help you lower or raise the pitch of your voice if it KILLS him. It eventually becomes like a mini class after school

Helps with internalized transphobia! Hes dealt with his fair share and knows how awful it can be and he will NOT being having you experience that as well we r practicing Self Care now

Picks apart any one who misgenders you until they’re crying he has NO fucking time for that behavior in this HOUSE

Sometimes self care is eating whatever you want and sitting in the dysphoria hoodies while watching chick flicks with Asmo

He likes dressing you up but he’s always sure to set boundaries so he never puts you into something that makes you feel uncomfortable

ALSO edits his posts and takes down anything that makes you uncomfortable!!

He loves you so much!!!!

Beel

another one to hand you The Dysphoria Hoodie and it’s very large and comfy!

he’ll help you make out a work out routine that will help you get the body you want and it makes him really happy to work out with you :)

he’s gonna hold your hand if you have to take shots and will give you puppy eyes if you don’t let him. He’s just worried!!!! He wants to help

stands behind you whenever you’re nervous about coming out to someone, he will NOT have someone making you feel bad or misgendering you

he’ll see food with trans pride colors and gives it too you, probably doesn’t even know what it is half the time but it made him think of you so he makes sure to get it for you

he doesn’t trip up on any of your new pronouns or name and makes it seem like he never even knew them. dead name???? what’s that??? a type of sauce?????

will let you vent to him whenever needed and will always make you a sundae after you’ve finished. it’s comically huge but it’s tasty and does make you feel a lot better, thanks beel

makes sure you remember to take off your binder if you’ve been wearing it for more than eight hours! and if you’ve been wearing heels to feel more fem he reminds you to take those off too and has a pair of slippers for you in his room that you can wear instead

hey! get this! He loves you so, so much :D

Belphie

you’re trans? ok kid join the club. he doesn’t make a big deal at all

are you still gonna cuddle with him and join him in his quest to make lucifer’s life difficult? yeah? ok then cool what’s ur name 

if he hears someone misgender you he waits till you’ve left the room and just kills whoever did it, dude’s unhinged what did you expect from him honestly

he’s actually really curious about any hormone therapy you’re on and likes listening to you rant about it to him. he likes seeing your face light up and it partly reminds him of lilith

calls your hormones something stupid like “oh dude, your gamer girl juice arrived.” or “hey your little man potion is here.” ...thanks belphie

will NOT let you sleep in a binder or push up bra!!! not healthy!! let ur chest breath guys 

like mammon, he gets you gendered gifts but they’re so fucking weird? you didn’t need a girls version of a collectable hot wheels set???? he got you blue lightning mcqueen sheets?????? those EXIST here????!!!!! when does he even shop......

introduces you to new people like “this is our resident boy/girl/human. they don’t do much but i think they’re cool.”

he really does care about you but he remembers when he came out he just didnt want people to make a big deal about it so he’s just doing what would have made him feel the most comfortable, but you can still see how much love he has for you when you look into his eyes

he loves you, so, so much :)

[roublardise]

my "Crowley isn't attracted to women" take

for @spnprideweek - day 2 - mlm

cw: dicussion of homophobia & transphobia all in all I wanted to highlight how canon gay Crowley is bc I love him 💕 thank u spn for Crowley even tho he deserved better

in the last weeks I've realized there's a huuge consensus in the fandom for pansexual Crowley. if you're pan or not and wanna hc Crowley as pan, power to you! but what's bothering me is the non-discussion of it all. the way it seems obvious for everyone. whereas, to me, Crowley has been canonically gay all this time.....

disclaimer: I'm aware Mark Sheppard alledgely said he saw Crowley as pansexual, however I can't even take these words for canon without context. Especially not when a year later he'd say Crowley's sexuality didn't matter. The way Mark Sheppard talks about characters' sexuality is more a "why are people making a big deal let them be" than "the character doesn't care." Moreover, actors pov can't be taken as canon imo. Jensen Ackles thought Dean straight for so long when Dean's been bi all this time as well. Sometimes actors are biased by their own experiences & stereotypes!

disclaimer #2: on god I don't wanna start discourse lmao. I just wanna share my silly thoughts about a tv show & question the way Crowley's sexuality is written in this silly homophobic tv show. don't @ me about what's making you think Crowley is indisputably pansexual bc I assure you I already know your points

That being said, here's why I think Crowley is a bear, a gay man, a trans gay man actually, a homosexual, who isn't attracted to women & some food for thoughts about why the unquestioned consensus towards pan Crowley could have roots in both homophobia & panphobia.

I don't think we can think of Crowley as your usual demon. We know too much about Crowley's life as a human, and the numerous ways in which he acts un-demony, almost humanly after. Considering him simply like a demon with no concept of gender preference who would be pan “by default” wouldn’t be right with his character. But we also can't question his sexuality in the exact same way we would a human's.

It also can't be thought in the same way as angels': as once-humans demons do have a concept of gender. Crowley especially cares a lot about his gender presentation and the way he's addressed. Not only does he literally sell his soul for a bigger d*ck as a human ; as a demon he uses the same vessel where other demons are shown to move once they had to leave one ; and for the few hours Crowley's possessing a woman, he clearly states he should still be referred to as king.

This will all be used for homophobic & transphobic jokes in the show, but I'll get back to that later on. Gender does matter to Crowley's identity, and I think it could be extended to his sexuality.

I've seen numerous descriptions of it all saying Crowley's sexuality was "ambiguous" and I guess it is, as he never explicitly used any label. However "ambiguous" doesn't mean bi or pan. It doesn't mean anything besides the fact we can't draw a clear-cut conclusion of his sexuality.

Imo we can actually draw a clear-cut conclusion of Crowley's sexuality but yeh, I'm getting there.

----------------

Let's take a look at canon events around Crowley & sexuality!

His character introduction is him enjoying making a homophobe man kiss him for a deal

It is rumoured that he was a demon's lover (Lilith's)

He heavily flirts with Bobby

He french kisses Bobby for a deal and takes a pic

He never kisses a woman on screen (tell me if I forgot anyone!)

He flirts with every single man he sees, and even more strongly when it's making the other uncomfortable

The other parent of Crowley's son is never mentioned nor even brought up

He has two orgies that we know of

He has sex with a demon who's possessing a woman (Lola) when he was addicted to human blood

He dates, has sex with, and asks Dean to rule Hell with him. He's in love with Dean

On late spn he drinks fruity drinks

He flirts with and implies he had sex with an angel (Naomi)

He flirts with Death (Billie)

He's into BDSM

I'm not gonna go into details with all the sexual stuff he says bc there's a lot.... But it's always about gay sex. (once again, if I'm forgetting smth pls tell me nicely)

Now, with all that I'd like to question specifically the elements people use to say Crowley is canonically attracted to women.

He has two orgies that we know of

There’s the one Crowley has while he’s himself possessing a woman ; iirc it’s a foursome with two other men and one woman. Crowley still counts as a King, as the show makes sure we know, admitedly this dialogue implies we should still think of him as a not-very-manly-man.

Honestly, if one is convinced Crowley is attracted to women based on this scene.. okay. Personally I don’t see it because the orgy is unplanned, it’s an opportunity Crowley takes. Is he even attracted to the two other men?? Who knows. We don’t even know if Crowley even touches the other woman, there’re so many ways to have group sex. Even if he did, having sex with one woman doesn’t make it impossible for him to be homosexual.

The second orgy is with Dean. Crowley describes it then: “We've done extraordinary things to triplets.” It’s interesting how before I went to check, I thought it was clear the triplets were women. But not at all! I’ve been tricked by heteronormativity myself. So this is up to interpretation. Even though the way the show doesn’t make sure we know the triplets were women is pretty telling (as I’ll talk about later).

It is rumoured that he was Lilith's lover

Well, this is a rumour. In this relationship Crowley would know Lilith as a demon possessing a woman, and Lilith would know Crowley as a demon possessing a man as well. Who's even to say they met in their vessels to sleep together. That's the kind of cases in which the ambiguity of Crowley human/demon situation makes it impossible to draw any kind of conclusion towards Crowley's attraction to women. Also if anything Lilith is clearly a lesbian lmao.

He has sex with Lola when he was addicted to human blood

Same thing here, the relationship is one of demon/demon. Though we do now they do meet in their vessels to sleep together. Besides that, the sex happens while Crowley is at a low point. She's the one bringing him human blood, which makes the sex more of a transaction than anything. It does fit a very grey area of consent which would be fair to question.

We can't know for sure whether the demon possessing the woman was a woman as well, but let's say she was: 1/ Crowley having sex once or twice with a woman doesn't prevent him from being homosexual. 2/ What is he seeing if not a demon's true form? 3/ Wasn't he in a self-destructive mental state?

It's a stretch, imo, to assume Crowley was attracted to her.

He flirts with and had sex with Naomi / flirts with Billie

This one is so ridiculous to me bc Naomi is an angel and as a demon, Crowley sees her true form. We don't even know who was her vessel when they had sex.

The flirt thing is interesting however, bc iirc Naomi and Billie are the only "women" we see Crowley actually flirt with. During the orgies or the demon sex there's no flirt involved. It's interesting bc, as Cas would say: "Naomi's vessel is a woman. Naomi is an angel."

Same case for Billie who's a reaper then Death. Spn is pretty unclear about how the whole thing works but we know reapers are kind of angels. In any case, I won't go as far as saying Billie has any connection to gender.

Moreover, the way Crowley flirts with them is pretty light next to everything else Crowley says to men. It's pretty personal, I'm aware, but I do relate a lot with the way Crowley flirts with them VS how I flirt with men just because (and I'm a lesbian).

Anyway! Both Naomi and Billie are supernatural creatures, which brings the count of women Crowley flirts with to... zero.

-> What I take from all that is that Crowley is attracted to men for sure ; to angels and demons ; and doesn't care about the genitalia involved in the sex he has. We have nothing about the kind of relationships he had as a human. His gender presentation matters a lot to him. The only long-term commitment he has is with Dean. I wouldn't even say he had a committed relationship with Gavin's other parent bc we don't know anything about them.

----------------

But what's my deal with homosexual Crowley? One can wonder, if Crowley doesn't care about bodies, doesn't that mean he can still be written as pan?

No! First because sexual attraction isn't about genitalia (even if transphobes would argue the contrary but they're transphobic so...). And second, well....

I would refer to this point as "how do I know Crowley isn't attracted to women? bc Dean is"

I'm convinced that if the show wanted to write Crowley as anything other than a gay man, it would have been way more obvious.

This is a show who wrote Dean catcalling a faceless woman on the street, for no other reason than to remind the viewers Dean was attracted to women & to balance it with the following homoerotic scene.

One could say spn doesn't have lots of women characters to begin with, but that's my point exactly: when spn wants to show attraction towards women, they do find women for people to be attracted to. Hell, they even give Gavin some girlfriend but never ever bring up the topic of Gavin's other parent. Even though an entire episode is dedicated to learning about Crowley's past.

What's important to understand Crowley's sexuality isn't the people he slept with ; it's the people he doesn't show interest in.

The absence of something is the presence of the thing, blablabla. It's a way to look at homosexuality that heteronormativity makes hard to see because, unconciously, we don't tend to question attraction towards the expected gender. One would ask for a 10 pages essay on why a character is gay, but one would need only a 2 sec kiss to assure a character's heterosexuality or attraction towards the expected gender.

----------------

In Crowley's case, his attraction to men is a huge part of his character right from the beginning (thanks god, at least no one's questioning that). Spn as a show that hears what the fans are saying and twists writing accordingly, is perfectly aware of that. Yet rather than pushing women at him along the course of the show to remind everyone how Not Gay Crowley is - the opposite happens.

Yeh, Lola, Naomi, Billie, they all happen in the later seasons. But even then, the show somehow can't write Crowley as attracted to a human woman.

What happens then is: not only does Crowley fall for Dean ; he engages in some BDSM play with Lucifer : and he switches from drinking only the finest Scotch to fruity cocktails.

The BDSM thing as well as the drink thing are choices rooted in stereotypes, that's how spn is! But it does canonize Crowley's homosexuality. They're depriving him of his "masculinity" as the show goes on, because they purposely write him as homosexual. I don't think spn would have ever written a bi or pan character that way.

We learned a few days ago that Crowley died in a gutter. He died in a gutter for a bigger d*ck. I'm just gonna refer to Oscar Wilde & Mika on this : "some of us in the gutter are looking up at the stars."

The "referred to as king" scene isn't about Crowley being a demon and so not caring about gender - it's the opposite. Other demons are the ones poiting out Crowley's vessel. This is a transphobic joke. It's the demon edition of the "gay boy in a dress" transmisogynistic trope.

Viewers aren't supposed to be on Crowley's side ; we're supposed to be giggling with the other demons while Crowley is being emasculated. Crowley gets a woman vessel because he's a not-very-manly-man, because he's a trans man, because he's homosexual.

And I know that bc Dean is written as bi, and all they're doing is reaffirming the way he does like women while being extra subtle with his love for men.

Meanwhile Crowley is losing influence and power, loses his authority as he loses his throne in Hell, gets humiliated by Lucifer, until all his character revolves around is his love for Dean. The way Crowley is then protrayed as some lovesick ex who can't move on is, imo, a straight man fantasy. Crowley's love is both used as predatory and as a tool to validate Dean's Peak Masculinity.

Spn has been burying their gays all along, and Crowley was right there being punished for not only being in love with Dean but for not being attracted to women. For never being able to be a "normal" guy. For never being able to be seen as a "normal" guy. For checking every homophobic stereotypes in the books. Crowley as a human dies because he's a trans man. Crowley as a demon dies because he's homosexual.

----------------

That's what leads me to be uncomfortable with the way the fandom seems to have a consensus towards pansexual Crowley. (Once again: idc about people's personal hc of Crowley as pan, I just want to think critically about the way no one thinks twice about it & accepts it as canon so easily. Hell, just bc I dared to ask what started the pan Crowley confirmation I got accused of erasing his pansexuality. All I did was ask a question.)

To me, it feels like erasing everything his character went through because he was gay. And it seems to be taken from a reasoning which is going to assume Crowley is attracted to women.

I mean: the reasoning would go "oh, Crowley clearly has a non-straight sexuality -> he's attracted to men -> he's pan" His attraction to women being accepted by default, without needing any backup. And when I look at the canon I see nothing implying he'd be attracted to women. Taking Crowley's attraction to women for granted is following an heteronormative thinking.

Being into people isn't all about who one sleeps with. It's about love. And when we look at what spn shows about Crowley's close relationships, the only meaningful one he got is with Dean. When Rowena wants payback for Crowley making her kill Oskar, she goes for his son.

And it's SO interesting to me because if angels can't be in love because they don't have a soul - can demons? as they're beings with a destroyed soul? And if so, how powerful of Crowley to still fall in love with Dean Winchester.... the power of gay love :) (Crowley 🤝 Cas)

----------------

To conclude all this with some more stuff to think about if, like me, you love questioning everything:

While it's not wrong per se to hc Crowley as pan, it can be worth questioning what's making us so sure we collectively just vibe with it? To me there's a few things: - As I was saying: heteronormative bias - Crowley being a non-fully-human character - Crowley being masculine (despite the show's attempts to erase that) - Crowley being into BDSM - Crowley flirting and making sexual remarks in every context

These, unconsciously, gives a vibe of a character who's "outside" of the gender norm, not making big deal of their sexuality, not even questioning it. This creates this idea of "ambiguity" around Crowley's sexuality. The way Crowley particularly seems to be really chill about sex, is a demon (so what does he know about gender?), and heavily flirty, ... is what most people will link to pansexuality. That doesn't mean thinking of Crowley as pan is being problematic™ ; this means in western medias that's what fills the "pansexual character" imagery (like basically: the Jack Harkness type).

However, when we look at it like that, none of these elements are defining of pansexuality. None of them are excluding him from homosexuality. If not stereotypes.

That's where it gets personal ; but it does make me feel like the huge consensus towards a pansexual Crowley (when there is no clear-cut evidence of it) is erasing the complexity of homosexual experiences. As I said at the begining: I'm happy if pansexual people can relate to Crowley ; everone's free to headcanon. But saying Crowley is canonically pansexual is a stretch - and a take rooted in homophobic stereotypes.

Imo Crowley may have been created with all these traits pushing towards a pan reading of his character. However, as the show went, he was clearly written as a homosexual man. The changes in his portrayal took a turn to be specifically homophobic. He gets imagery that only strictly homosexual characters got (such as drinking fruity cocktails like Aaron. Meanwhile Dean, on the same scene, is allowed beer & whiskey.)

We're used to taking spn's homophobic rep and jokes to make it our own. Yet it seems, when it comes to Crowley, the fandom doesn't see it.

Sometimes people aren't attracted to the gender heteronormativity expects them to be attracted to.......... sometimes people are gay and it's not an umbrella term.

[seeminglyseph]

I'm gonna say it. There are more reasons for lesbians and trans women to have solidarity than there are for them to be at odds. Like. We're both meant to feel like predators in women's spaces for circumstances we can't control bc straight women see us as inherently perverse for no reason. Tbh guys let's all just chill u know? Idk I just thought I of all people would appreciate the take

I definitely do, I think, I grew into my identity as an adult through the lesbian community. Just the same as my butch sisters I heard straight girls whisper about how they'd rather run naked through the boy's locker than know there was a lesbian in the girl's. I think gnc women know the trauma of forced feminization almost all afab people face as a product of a lot of 'right way to be a girl' situations (how hard do we have to fight with stylists to get short hair? how often do women get assumed to not care or be reckless or slovenly just because they present masculinely? It is traumatizing for everyone trying to be forced into a mold, it's just a different kind of traumatizing when you also happen to be a man.) It just seems like being 'allowed' to be masculine is such a freedom. But the reverse is true for trans women, and part of it is acknowledging the way we raise cis boys is fucked up and deeply damaging, same with women. (and baby boys are still victims, no baby boy has power that he uses to abuse, baby boys are just as vulnerable as baby girls to manipulation, judgement and pressure to fit a certain mold.) So it means admitting there's something traumatic about growing up amab, and that someone will want what I found traumatizing. but really it's the same problem we're all facing. Society has an idea of who we are supposed to be and punishes us for not being it. I've known cis straight allo people who just dress non-conforming talk about how much pressure they are under just existing outside the mold, and I think we keep blaming our own for why people treat us like shit, but it's not our own.

So I feel like instead of arguing how much everyone's experiences differ it would be so important to embrace the things we all know. Trans women and lesbians are often both considered doing femininity "wrong" because it's not the tradwife goals no one actually meets. I feel like ~*somehow*~ ~*very mysteriously*~ the rhetoric that trans women were the reason lesbians face oppression, or that they should narrow the view of femininity again so as to look mainstream and back to the weird tradwife trend but with other women started rising. The term "Lesbian Utopia" floats around and smooshes lesbian relationships into a certain kind of box.

Honestly I think TERFs damage themselves plenty as well, narrowing down the correct presentation of womanhood to a different oppressive standard doesn't fix anything, and honestly most butch lesbians I know are just as victimized by this radicalized idea of the 'acceptable' lesbian. Much as they argue that we're transing their butches, so much radfem ideology identifies butch women as dangerous due to their closeness to masculinity. The idea that either femininity or masculinity is inherently bad or good is flawed to the core, because identity and gender expression is so personal two people could feel the same things and identify different and be completely correct about their own feelings. There are dangerous men and there are dangerous women and there are dangerous nonbinary people. But it isn't because of gender, or sexuality, it's down to the person. People make decisions to do bad things, and all they stand for is themselves. (though identifying as a terf is seemingly drawing your identity from a place of hatred and defines femininity as both ultimate purity and the highest form of suffering. Very catholic. Not a fan. develop some identifying features that don't revolve around hating other people it's weird.)

[butchviking]

What does "feminism can and must be compatible with trans issues" mean to you? Ive been trying to be more inclusive, but trans issues often to seem to be incompatible with feminism.

hm well that was one line of the post that i did think 'i wouldnt phrase it quite that way'. i think besides the weird-ass conservative strains of feminism that dont reflect what i consider feminism at all, feminism IS compatible with trans issues. not that "it must be" like feminists have to change what they're doing to revolve more around trans issues or anything - feminism has no obligation to fight for trans issues just like the anti-racism movement has no obligation to fight sexism and the gay rights movement has no obligation to fight for disability rights - but that those causes simply ARE compatible. classic example: the public bathroom debate. right now that's often framed like feminism and trans activism are diametrically opposed and there can be no resolution for one that doesn't contradict the needs of the other. the trans activist movement wants all public toilets to be unisex and based on gender identity instead; the feminist movement wants sex-segregation regardless of gender identity. only, most feminists i know all agree by now that just. adding a unisex/gender-neutral option is literally the obvious and best way to keep people safe. and if there's no room for adding an extra, convert all the current spaces to single-stall unisex facilities. that way literally everyone is kept safe, no-one's rights are encroached on at all and anyone who takes issue is either a predator upset that they don't have the opportunities for abuse they wanted or a selfish weirdo who only cares about how they feel abt women or trans ppl or whatever ("but thats not good enough i want to use the WOMENS room!!"/"why should we have to give up OUR space just because of the transgenders!!") rather than about the actual safety & wellbeing of both of those groups. we're made to think feminism and trans rights activism are incompatible on this, its one of the biggest talking points in conservative media bc they KNOW it gets everyone at each others throats. but theyre literally compatible theyre literally so so compatible there is no reason on this earth anyone should still be having this stupid fucking debate its such a COLOSSAL waste of all our time.

there are certain things i think some feminists could do with not being so weird about. a lot of women are still super yucked out by male gender non-conformity and a lot of them for some reason still won't even admit it even though they bang on about it aallllll the time - but oh no, that's not bc they think it's creepy and fucked up for dudes to wear dresses and makeup, they're only saying these horrible things abt it because this one dude is transgender and that means they're evil and misogynistic by default so theyre fair game! (does anyone remember - haha kidding i know u remember i know i never shut up abt it - how many women on radblr were so so weirded out and for some reason ANGERED by gerard in his little dresses & skirts. he's not even trans. in fact suddenly everyone seemed to be saying "oh yeah he's definitely going to come out as trans sometime soon 🙄 he's obviously drunk all the gender kool-aid 🙄" like shut up you literally just made that up in your head to try and justify ur anger. shut upppp.) or sometimes it's like "men shouldnt wear makeup because its mocking our oppression it's wearing our chains for fun" - it really isnt and you need to get over yourself.

there are also certain things some trans activists could do with not being so weird about. if i see one more fucking transwoman act like its her god-given right to be included in lesbian dating pools, or transman that its his god-given right to be included in gay mens dating pools, i am going to start burning things i am going to start burning so many things and people too and i am going to squidge all the organs from inside these people until all the moisture is wrung out and i am going to set those on fire too. homosexuality is fucking natural innate sex-based and NORMAL and HEALTHY and GOOD. ive seen pro-trans lesbians turn into "terfs" based on this point alone btw - they were so fucking sick of all the homophobia they became vehemently opposed to the whole movement. they began to believe that feminism, gay rights activism, and trans rights activism AREN'T compatible. i still believe they are i just think some people need to throw out the bullshit that isnt actually relevant to either cause.

[selchwife]

If anyone hasnt asked yet...can u tell us more about ifrain? Im curious if they have any special traits (like elves' lifespan and transformation)!!

yeah absolutely i can!!

ifrain and humans are collectively kind of the "everyman" of this universe; they're most numerous, so a lot of what people consider normal is based on combined ifrain and human standards. they aren't QUITE so different as the elves, but they do have standout features.

aside from horns and claws, there is not a lot of sexual dimorphism for ifrain. there's no difference in average height between men and women, and they both tend to have a similar figure (except boobs, but ifrain women tend to be a little flatter-chested than humans). even their voices sound very similar! facial hair isn't super common for them compared to humans, but both men and women can get it, and tend to get it at the same rate.

during childhood, ifrain all have nubby horns, which makes them hard to tell apart gender-wise. once they hit their teens, horns start growing in for boys. this happens very quickly, and so it's pretty important for boys at that age to learn how to file them and care for them. for girls, their horns don't grow, but their claws are often much longer and more powerful than boys', so they have to learn to care for their claws well. for trans ifrain, horns are often considered more important to transition than other physical features.

ifrain tend to top out around 5'5" - 5'8" height-wise; they are noticeably shorter than humans on average.

ifrain have catlike eyes! they come in the colors you'd expect for humans, but yellow is the most common color. heterochromia isn't a very unusual feature for them, either. they have very good night vision, just like cats. just like cats, too, their eyes get really big and round when they see something they like, or when they're focusing really hard.

their tails come in a lot of shapes, just like cat tails. some ifrain have thin tails, some have really fluffy ones, and some even have lion tails. there's also a pretty rare feature for them where some ifrain are born with short, deerlike/bunnylike tails, which is considered kind of an impairment because it does mess with their sense of balance.