#but also he did quite literally post all that shit online so. i think its fair game

[thecoolertails]

hiii im still not shutting up about marble hornets. yet

[moodr1ng]

(making my own post after being in someones replies again lol) i do think there was kind of a Moment on tumblr in i wanna say circa 2019-2021 where a lot of the accumulated biphobia that was present in the lgbt community at large and in particular on tumblr sort of blew up into a number of bi bloggers starting to talk a lot more on the subject and make a lot of posts explaining the material consequences of biphobia, the lack of support bisexuals have always gotten from the rest of the community, the specific biphobic opinions/takes that are popular both offline and in online communities, and also a lot of conversations about bisexuality, what its like to be bisexual, what it means to us, a ton of education on bisexual history, a lot of trans and nonbinary bisexuals talking about how bisexuality interacts w our genders, etc. at the time and being involved in all of this tangentially it felt a bit like a sort of tumblr bisexual renaissance where the pot finally boiled over and a ton of us started to be really loud and in your face about bisexuality and biphobia. i think this was a major reason for why a lot of takes that had previously been very widespread and either accepted or at least treated as debatable (thinking about butch/femme discourse for example) got rolled back and a lot of people who had been very casually biphobic all over the place suddenly changed their tune, switched their public opinions, and started sharing a lot more of support for bisexuals (though, tbh, i dont think i have seen literally one apology for past biphobia).

i do think there was some discourse that went a bit too far and ended up counterproductive (ive personally rolled back a lot of my past anger about the pansexuality vs bisexuality shit into a view that i think is a lot more charitable and community-oriented), but overall bisexuals on here did a lot of work to get heard, get understood, and get some much-needed support by the rest of the lgbt community, and there were also a lot of behind the scenes conversations where bi people created spaces like very active discord servers where bisexuality was explored in-depth among bisexuals, which tbh i largely credit for me being able to comfortably identify as bigender.

but, well, this Moment of bisexuals being loud and proud about bisexuality and refusing to continue to tolerate biphobia was met with, like, extremely caustic and vicious backlash which has led SO many bi bloggers who i followed, knew, was in servers and dms with, was/am friends with etc to either quit tumblr or move to new blogs where they only keep around vetted people and no longer widely engage w the topic of biphobia. my alter ran one of those blogs which i dont think could have really been qualified as popular, but which had a ton of constant interaction and some really big posts, all of which led to daily biphobic harassment as well as scrutiny of every other part of his identity and repeated cruelty about things that it was incredibly inappropriate for people to attack him on - some of you who followed him will recall the repeated attacks and accusations of ableism for his 'weird' typing style, despite a disclaimer on his blog that he types like this bc of autism+adhd+did, as well as a lot of vitriol and aggression which i think was at least partially racially motivated. like, im not even willing to disclose the url or his name here because im STILL paranoid about getting harassed years after he deactivated, which, like many others i know, he did because the constant biphobia was so bad for his mental health that the blog even just continuing to exist was not sustainable.

im not sure to what degree the conversations that were started on here during this time are continuing - im not seeing much of it anymore, but then again maybe im just not following the people having them - but it certainly feels like that Moment has died down now, though i certainly still feel the aftereffects in how a lot of people have changed their stances on bisexuality. it does feel like an acute loss still that so many bi people were effectively shut down and harassed off tumblr or into silence and reclusiveness by the backlash to bisexuals speaking out (and this especially imo affected bisexuals of color, especially black bisexuals, as per usual on tumblr). i miss the posts i would get to read daily as well as the very active discord servers and other conversations i got to be privy to at the time. i think this, as much as the discussions on biphobia themselves, rendered very explicit the degree of biphobia thats present within the lgbt community. as soon as a number of bisexuals got fed up with it and started to talk about it openly, the open and unashamed biphobia also ramped up.

ig the thing im stuck on is - were not talking about it as much, but all the people who dedicated themselves to harassing bisexuals into silence for years are still here. some stances have been changed and a lot of performative "we love bisexuals!" posts got shared but ultimately the work is still cut out for us going forward. however, i dont think i or my alter will be doing any of that work on tumblr in the future. the focus will have to be on real-life community to spare ourselves the backlash that comes from speaking about this on here.

idk, not sure how to end this whole tirade. i just happened to be thinking about all this earlier today and a mutual brought it up again just now so its on my mind. i do still miss that sense of heightened bisexual community that came from all of this. i personally not only was able to re-identify as bisexual after identifying as gay for a few years bc these conversations led me to reevaluate my sexuality in a more accepting light, but also i unlearned a ton of internalized biphobia which i had not only tolerated but often strongly believed myself, usually with a sort of self-flagellating notion of "i have to bow down to the rest of the community and accept that my opinion is inherently lesser because bisexuality is an inferior sexuality" which i only stopped believing after being in these bisexual communities. ig i just have to be content with the circle of bi friends ive built both online and offline and what benefits ive gained from these discussions.

[g-xix]

am i the only one who thinks cancel culture has gone a bit too far? like we’re literally “canceling” people for the stupidest shit these days, and let’s be honest, most of us do these things in private as well. tell me you’ve NEVER made like a lgbtq+ joke (obviously not a full on offensive one) if a cc even made a harmless joke they’d full on canceled and harassed

IM NOT AIMING THIS AT U, i just rlly wanted to state my opinion on this 😭 i just don’t think it’s fair how we also judge some cc’s but not all. its different if they said some shit like “kill the (blank)” but for example (a stupid one, i know, but it’s 3 am and i can’t think properly) the internet cancelled charli d’amelio because she said ‘she couldn’t wait to hit a 100 mil because even numbers’ and that she wouldn’t eat a snail … bruva

No because I agree with quite a bit of this post, bc:

Cancel culture is unnecessarily didactic and entitled sometimes.

It's really weird how as an audience, people try to tell others that what they do is wrong, and that they should correct their actions. Because who the fuck has the rights to make the rules of what is wrong and right within society?

I think cancel culture is valid when it's consistent with laws - yk - getting people like child groomers called out and removed from platforms because that's plain fucking illegal. The law system is a great place to base your morals off of (from my limited knowledge of laws), but then again...

If a CC has committed a crime, is just removing their platform the best thing to do?

Sure, alerting their following a person is bad is a great place to start. Yk, reduce their following at their supporting because they're a straight WRONG'UN... but then what? We just let them live their normal ass lives after committing a crime? When the hell does police step in and sort it out?

Cancel culture is good at alerting the audience of a person's wrongdoings if illegal, but at that point, serious investigation and police intervention is probably also worth a shot.

But cancel culture is also really fucking harmful.

Obviously, rate of cancellation is very different online. Certain fandoms have different rates of cancellability, and boundaries with what CCs say. Need it in graphical form? Say less.

(No data backing this up, quite opinion and personal experience based so err... maybe take w a pinch of salt)

But there's places like AMP and Sidemen whereby they do A LOT of more morally gray things (objectify women, mild-casual homo and transphobia...)

And then there's placed like the MC fandom which need to take the fucking chill pill and slow it down. I mean, I remember this from my MCYT days:

"I get lesbians", said TommyInnit, "get" meaning understand (of course) - which didn't seem like a big deal to me. It empathised w women thinking men were a bit ew and unpreferable, and sure, it's a bit demeaning to men in a way whereby there's a bit "men < women" stereotype, but I don't think that's very harmful in an already patriarchal society.

but regardless, the fans were pretty fkn pissed because they interpreted what he said to mean that he... got with lesbians... And when someone explained to them that he meant "get" as in "understand" - you know, he's not a raging misogynist, self-proclaimed lesbian-undoing womanizer - did they back down and admit there was a misinterpretation within communication?

Nope!

Instead they tried to prove that he was still in the wrong because that was a poor word choice and he should've just said "understand" instead, if that's what he really meant.

They literally tried to 'cancel' him, for a lexical choice.

So in times like that, I remember that cancel culture isn't a wonderful thing - and the Charli D'amelio reference you give is just as valid tbh, anon.

Charli's cancellation + hate, I would love to talk about, but considering this is already a stupidly long n waffle-y post, I think I'll save it for next time.

Overall conclusions + take-aways: -Cancel culture is good at taking platforms away from genuinely bad ppl -But who are we to try and push our own morals onto a Content Creator? Ignorance is bad and should be corrected but often-times this didactic role which viewers take on is also just plain entitled -I think it's better to point out flaws and present them to the audience + CC to hear them out, rather than viciously aiming to remove a platform and enforce views onto others -Some places need a lot less cancel culture bc it's just not needed - some places need a lot more maturity to understand why what a CC does isn't morally great -Lots of generalised sweeping statements made here - feel free to argue them j don't come at my neck ab them

peace n love as always

[toomuchracket]

I looooove all of your Ross talk🫶🏻 I’m a sucker for best friends to lovers so imagine being best friends since idk maybe 13 and finally once you’re older realizing/telling each other that you have feelings for one another❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹😭😭😭

oh god yeah like maybe it's one of those situations where you live next door to each other your whole lives, so the two of you walk to and from school together every day and become quite close, and then ross drives you when he passes his test. and i really do think it's mostly a platonic love you have for each other at the start - like obviously he's cute and you're cute and you're both sweet and you get on really well, but the penny doesn't really drop for you romantically until you're about eighteen and at a party.

the band (whatever iteration they are at that point) have played, you're all a bit drunk, someone suggests spin the bottle, and you're all like this is a great idea let's do it. and then ross has a go and it lands on you and you're both a bit like "oh dear haha" but you think nothing of it, and then you kiss and it's just an oh moment for you. like, it's a good kiss. you want it to happen again as soon as your lips pull apart. and there's a softness in ross' eyes when he looks at you afterwards that you've never seen, but it gives you butterflies. and he's the same - kissed you and thought "shit, why did i never do this sooner?", then fell head over heels at the way your cheeks went pink and you smiled at him afterwards. but you both know that a relationship isn't ideal right now - the band are seriously working to get a record deal and break into the industry, and you're going off to uni somewhere else in the country - so you just never mention that you like each other. and you stay in touch over the years - you go to the shows that you can when the boys get bigger, which gets harder as you graduate and start working, and ross isn't always home for christmas for very long, so there's some years you don't get a chance to catch up at all. and you both see other people, but never anything serious, and you both get a little rush of butterflies whenever you see the other has posted on social media. and then maybe in like 2018, one of your friends from school gets married, and you're talking to your old friend group online before it - all of the boys are invited and going, and you're so so excited to see all of them, especially ross. and the day comes, you go by yourself because you're not seeing anyone, but you're feeling good. and you've been in the venue for literally less than five seconds when you hear a familiar voice go "oh, there she is!", and you just turn to see ross looking suave and fly and sexy in his suit (and it's 2018, so he's really tanned and his hair is short) and you're internally like "ooooooooh my fucking god". and you run over to him as fast as your heels will allow and just hug him (you kind of lose it at how huge he is because its been so long since you hugged him. like, he's a man now) and you're like "god you look so good how are you?" and ross pulls back and twirls you round and says "i look good? you look amazing. it's so good to see you". and you're both a bit giddy chatting for a bit, before ross takes you to see the other boys and say hi - they're also very excited to see you, and it's good to catch up. and you end up sitting next to ross during the ceremony, and at the meal too, because he also didn't bring a plus one. and you're having such a a good time chatting with ross - it's just like old times, you and your best friend, but you can't get over how fucking sexy he is, so you're deliberately flirting with him just to see what happens. and he plays into it! whispers in your ear that he can't get over how gorgeous you look, absent-mindedly puts his hand on your thigh, drags you up to dance with him to this must be the place by talking heads (his fave song apparently!). and it's not a slow dance per se, but you're holding hands and bopping and you're trying not to think about how familiar and safe you feel with ross (which is NOT helped by the song lyrics AT ALL), and then he hugs you close and you just sway along to the music. and then when he pulls away from you, he has the same look on his face as he did when you kissed him that night all those years ago and then he's like "let's get a drink". and you do - he pays - and then you take your drinks outside. and it's quiet, just the two of you on this loveseat, and ross is like "you're not seeing anyone at the minute, are you?" and you say no and he's like "neither am i. that's good". and then he kisses you! and that's it - the start of you guys being together <3

[iwishf1wasreal]

I'm new to F1 and have no idea why ppl hate Daniel and Max...what did both of them do?

first and foremost, welcome! i hope you're enjoying f1!

secondly...this is a lot of lore to squeeze into one post. i think most of the max hate started with the 2021 championship controversy. if you've seen DTS, its goes into it all but that caused a really big divide in f1. max has been called out by the mongolian government for using slurs on the radio and he didnt really have the best reaction. his gf, kelly piquet, is the daughter for former f1 driver nelson piquet, who had some pretty nasty racist things to say about lewis (tho max did say it was wrong to say them...but also defended nelson's character :/). i'm sure theres more but that's all i have off the top of my head.

as for daniel, i was a huge daniel fan. i put time and money into that little elf. then he did an interview with barstool sports that was that start of my disillusionment. he's always been pretty douchey-frat-boy-y with edgelord humor and obvious pandering to his male fans (despite probably having more women fans but i digress). in the interview, daniel makes a joke about women driving. extremely original material, we've never heard that in the 31 years since a woman last raced in formula one. he has a long history of making jokes like that--quite literally too many examples to put into one post. most recently, he publicly supported Christian horner after he was accused of harassment and said he felt for him. it just felt like such a slap in the face considering how hard it is to just be a FAN that's a woman around motorsport. getting sexually harassed at races or at work and spammed online by meninist losers isn't enough, the drivers feel they need to start shitting on us too. so, i still have a lot of frustration towards him because men ages 13-65 love daniel and when he acts like that, it only emboldens them to do it too. and ten times worse because they dont have a public image or brand to protect.

but its f1, there's always a reason to hate everyone. seriously, name any driver and they have something that makes you look at them a lil different. it is the sport of war crimes, tax evaison and crusty old europeans assholes.

[munsonology]

Well I need a new therapist lmaoooo

I told her I was uncomfortable regarding a certain celebrity.

I don't mind them as a person, though I feel they are v performative on certain topics and exploits things for money. My main issue is they don't tell their fans anything like they don't say hey no death threats. Maybe they have and then I would feel slightly better about the person, but the fans are moreso my issue.

Regular fans are fine, my sister is. But its the rabid stans who want to crawl in the celebrity's ribcage to breathe the same air as them. Crazy. True definition of stan. Like, I know someone who quite literally went to this celeb's concert not once but THREE times. Fine no big deal, enjoy, I've been to a concert more than once just not in the same concert season lineup thing. Except they then begged for money because they had spent their money for rent and their BABY who is going through a growth spurt has no clothes that fit- this person even said they spent the money on the concert in the comments. Like what???? I've seen fans doxx people for having a differing opinion. Just not people I feel comfortable associating with

Normally idc im not involved whatever, just avoid them. The REASON it got brought up to my therapist, wasn't because I just randomly dislike this celeb. That isnt the reason.

The REASON it got brought up is because Spotify wrapped happened and I mentioned that I was uncomfortable because two people who severely fucked me up mentally (one was emotionally abusive and the other harassed and stalked me) had this artist in their top 5. Also My ex friend who ended up posting pictures of my house when she knew I had a stalker (I had moved snd they hadn't found this place until they posted) also had this artist in top 5. (And yes if was malicious, we had an argument and then they posted the outside of my house, sure they deleted the post later but the guy had already seen it as she had a public account and he followed some of my friends on fake accounts. We weren't friends after this)

I made the comment that they all had widely different tastes but all liked the same artist, and I made a joke that I should have known it was a red flag (we had spent the therapy session discussing signs i should have noticed in these people and ways they were alike which made me even think of the artist WHICH is why it was brought up).

And to be fair the reasons I listed of the people who have done things to me are probably why I dislike the celeb.

But my therapist actually called me stupid and wrong because apparently the artist was in THEIR top 5. Which, uh, okay my bad. Started going hard against me, even cursed at me So I again point out that in my mind it's linked to my abusers and people who betrayed my trust, and my therapist went "the majority isnt like that" to which I mentioned the rest of the points about things I've seen online. I guess I could have just apologized but she was coming at me and I was already on edge talking about everything, then they called me stupid and berating me...

Well I was uncomfortable then but i thought "hey, you did insult someone they obviously like, it's normal to be a lil defensive" and was like well we can move past. But no, quite literally this last session sealed the deal, because instead of talking about my trauma or anything, she made me listen to their albums. Which wtf??? Who does that irl?? Explained all the nuances and the theories and shit I DONT CARE about. I tried to tell them, but ok I also infodump on things I care about. Then they told me that my abusers must not be THAT bad because they have good taste. I walked out. Still got charged for the full session, and I filed a complaint. I dont see how they have their license????

I'm pissed rn haha and it actually had the opposite effect and has solidified that I do not like this artist in my mind. At. All.

Aww bestie that sucks 😭 first thank you for sharing! Second, this therapist is completely unprofessional. They shouldn’t have let their personal like of this artist affect how they’re treating you during the sessions YOU pay for.

And the fact that someone spent their rent money and their baby’s money…where’s the priorities, where’s the values, where’s the morals?

For me, I’ve also disliked a celebrity because of their fans and fandoms. Especially on twitter. I could write a whole thesis on how dysfunctional this fandom is on twitter 💀

There’s good and bad sides to all fandoms, I think in general we all have to find where we fit and surround ourselves with people who value us as much as we value them.

Anon, you have every right to like or not like something. That’s what makes friendships beautiful. I hope you’re able to find a therapist that can support you properly anon 🩷😭 some of these people get their license out a happy meal

[nutzworth]

obviously the popularization (or should i say tiktokification) of the whole "is he acoustic?" thing is the worst thing in the world especially as neurotypical take it and twist it to hell and back. Unsure if theyre neurotypical actually. but neurotypical enough for their jokes about it to be WEIRD. and like im not diagnosed but you know i have my suspicions. and thats whatever and im always conscious about self diagnosis. ANYWAY.

a few days ago in my psychology class something evil and terrible happened and i keep thinking about it... we;re learning about memory and how it works and theres different kinds of encoding (like putting an experience into memory storage). and theres visual encoding (the look of stuff) and semantic encoding (the meaning of stuff) and ACOUSTIC encoding (the sound of stuff). and when my psych teacher said these 3 types some of the most annoying kids in my class (their asses do not do the homework. brother this is AP. stop cheating on your 4 question reading check quizzes. stop talking to each other when were doing stuff. holy christ.) these kids were like ACOUSTIC! LOL! IS IT ACOUSTIC! TEE HEE! and i was pissed off. commenting that sort of thing on a tiktok post is one thing (as i expect terrible jokes to be there) but you shouldnt bring that into real life. especially not for such a mundane word as acoustic. do you flip your shit if i mention acoustic guitars? whats wrong with you? its the same kind of forbidden that mentioning homestuck at school is. or like danganronpa. or yaoi or other just SO online concepts. you dont bring that sort of thing to our place of LEARNING! HAVE RESPECT!

anyway thats my story. i keep thinking about it. hate these damn kids. i hope they all fail out of the class during finals. theyre literally so evil "psych teacher what do you meeean we have to do homework and reading :-( i dont waaanna im so buuusy cant we do this tomorrow cant we have a work day today instead of doing the fun things youve planned :-(" and like YOURE the one that signed up for the AP CLASS!!!!!!!! boo hoo you cant skip the reading this is COLLEGE. COPE!

all these damn kids have leadership and sports and like 4 ap classes and theyre taking a college class like ok youre burnt out you did it to yourself. cope and seethe or quit some extracurriculars. pretty sure fewer extracurriculars you do good on are better than 1 million extracurriculars you all FAIL. i also recognize i am like the best at doing school nothing truly gets me other than school i love to learn + will crumble in the job force cus im too good at school to be doing anything else but like you know. the least you can do is stop complaining. i wish murder was legal sometimes

[martyrlamb]

I’ve seen your post from October and where you said “by sharing it they condone it” or “someone will commit sexual violence”

and hear me out

It’s true someone might. Not even psychologists and other experts in the human psyche can predict who is and isn’t going to act out on fiction, and why or how. And in fact, if you think fiction condones something, then that says more about you than the fiction itself. It tells me about your upbringing, culture, beliefs and such.

media psychology is a research field I could recommend to you

i wasn’t going to dignify this with a response but i can’t leave this alone because What the hell. im just going to do it in bullet points bc im genuinely baffled at this. tw talking about sexual violence

og post

- did you even read what i said at all?? 😭 and trying to flip what i said onto me, then being condescending about it is RIDICULOUS like actually abnormal.

- where the hell did you pull that second quote from??? i quite literally said the opposite of that in my post, “when someone is desensitized to this kind of violence, they will think it's okay in their real personal lives. maybe not to even do themselves, but have someone do it to them. i've seen countless people believe they're into extreme kinks because of how the internet has desensitized them.”

- the only thing i could remotely link to that second quote is this. which IN THE CONTEXT ALSO COUNTERS YOUR WHOLE POINT. WHICH YOU HAVE CONVENIENTLY FORGOTTEN TO ADD. i say, “even if you don't want to partake in incest or sexual violence someone does. and i can guarantee that they read and enjoy the type of smut that's being written and posted on here” i literally say that not everyone who reads it will commit sexual violence, i say that people who do (not that everyone who consumes media like that will) are likely to consume this content because why wouldn’t they indulge in a gross fantasy they enjoy??????????

- im not going to regurgitate the same points from my original post but yeah. people who post stuff like that condone it to some extent because no one writes non-con stepcest hardcore smut without some kind of enjoyment out of it 😐 Literally just read my post and you’ll see why i say that bc obviously you either skimmed it or deliberately misinterpreted what i said or you actually lack critical thinking skills

- i’ve taken psych classes before and there’s actually many confirmed factors that contribute to the likelihood of someone’s beliefs/pleasures being influenced by writing and media because it either confirms beliefs they already had or introduces them to a new pipeline that preys on a vulnerable part of their personality. smut online hasn’t been explored specifically because its niche and relatively new in comparison to psychology studies as a whole

- then, i feel like i know what you’re getting at by trying to flip this narrative onto me being like “well maybe its a problem with YOU since you can’t separate reality from fiction” literally SHUTT HE HELL UPPPP stop being dense on purpose 😭

- i can separate reality from fiction just fine. fictional murderers? evil villains? fine with me. doesn’t mean everyone who likes them condones murder. the difference is that these people are writing these things as something to TAKE PLEASURE IN. THATS THE MAJOR DIFFERENCE!! dont paint ME to be the weird one for saying that writing men (or anyone) beating the shit out of women for sexual gratification is strange and harmful

- lastly, clearly you missed the entire fucking point of my post because it wasn’t even ABOUT the people who might commit sexual violence irl. that was a minute point in comparison to the larger context which was: the psychological damage it causes to vulnerable people that may think receiving this violence in their personal lives is okay!!!! due to being desensitized to it!!!!!!!

so. yeah. whatever. reread my post extremely slowly or something. im not usually this aggressive and rude but you put words in my mouth that i didn’t say and then had the gall to be condescending with that last line 😐.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #109

(taken january 31st, uploading surveys taken while gone... we're at least over halfway done? haha)

Have you ever gotten your legs waxed? No, that sounds absolutely excruciating, especially when your hair is as thick and long as mine is. Waxing my lip and eyebrows back in the day hurt enough.

Have you ever read anything by Edgar Allen Poe? Yeah, The Raven and The Tell-tale Heart off the top of my head.

Do you know anyone named Hunter? I do; he was my neighbor when I lived in the woods (I think where I've lived most of my life so far), and we used to play together as kids a lot. I'm quite a bit older than him, but he was still fun to hang out with, especially when it came to catching bugs and stuff and playing video games. He's all grown up now with his own girlfriend. :')

What was the reason for the last time you restarted your computer? Oh I was SO annoyed, Roman walked on my keyboard and did something where the computer totally, completely froze, and I was deep into an RP post so I was furious. Had to restart it incorrectly, but THANK GOD the drafts function on the site saved my post, lol.

Can you say anything in Korean? If so, please do: Nah, I can't.

Do you like horses? I absolutely love horses and I am VERY much looking forward to photographing horses soon thanks to a friend. <3

What are your grandfathers’ names? William/Bill and... WOW I'm awful, I don't remember Dad's dad's name. :/

Were you forced to read The Odyssey in high school? Yes; maybe not all of it, but I at LEAST remember reading some. We also watched the movie.

Have you ever seen a snake in real life? Yeah, both in the wild and as pets. I currently have one and love her to death.

Are you against seances? I don't care. I DO believe in treating the dead with respect though, if you're gonna do that; we don't have the slightest idea what really happens after death and I definitely do believe in angry spirits and their ability to loosely interact with our reality, so I wouldn't tempt shit, just to be safe.

Do you own any superhero shirts? No. I only have a couple Harley Quinn ones.

Game you were best at in P.E./gym? I absolutely hated P.E., so nothing.

Favorite crystal? Dragon's breath opal.

What did you learn from your first job? I am an absolutely horrible salesperson.

Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz.

Least favorite flavor of food or drink? Cranberry flavored drinks are so awful I literally cannot drink them. I also don't like really fishy foods.

Least favorite pattern? Uh... I'm not sure. I'm not big on like, animal print as a fashion thing I guess. I love cool patterns ON the animals, of course, but not elsewhere.

Favorite weird flavor combo? I absolutely love waffles that also have a layer of peanut butter on them, like I prefer it over only syrup.

Favorite potato food? French fries.

Earth tones or jewel tones? Oh, come on, that's hard! It really depends.

Do you call them fireflies or lightning bugs? I've used both, but I think I only ever said "lightning bug" as a kid.

Writing or drawing? I get more joy out of creating a drawing I'm proud of, but I'm much more likely to write.

Lamps, overhead lights, fairy lights, or sunlight? FAIRY LIGHTS!!!! For Christmas I got this "tree" that you can wind across your wall(s) that have little tiny light bulbs as its "foliage" and I cannot wait til we can move my bed and set it up because that shit is ALWAYS gonna be on.

Nicknames? "Britt" is the most common one that everyone uses. Online though, "Ozz(y)" is frequented bc of the username I usually use. In WoW, everyone in my main's guild know me as "Alessa" because my main character is Alessand(a)ra. Oh, and my childhood nickname from Mom is "Twinkie" lmfao, she gave all her children sweets nicknames. She still uses it sometimes. Girt's pointed out he wants to have the "perfect" nickname click for me one day, which I think is absolutely adorable, but he can't pick one.

How many phone numbers do you have memorized? I have only JUST memorized my mother's phone number, and that's it. It took months upon months of regularly giving it to doctors and stuff to learn and as terribly sad as this is, I'm literally PROUD of myself for finally internalizing a phone number.

Do you prefer heroes or villains? Villains, duh.

What political cause are you most passionate about? Proooobably LGBTQ+ rights. I just find it so, so remarkably hard to fathom how people are against people consensually being in love.

Have you ever considered having children? I've never considered it for like, that current moment, but I go back and forth about the future.

Have you ever considered acting? Nope.

Who was the last person you slept next to? Girt.

Do you think you can be in love and still cheat on your S.O.? No, I don't.

What is the most embarrassing thing anyone has on video of you? Oh who even knows.

Did you ever get lost as a child? Yeah, in a Food Lion I think? Maybe Wal-Mart? An old lady helped me find my mom.

What was the last dream you had? I had a newborn baby is all I can remember. I forgot it until I read this question.

What is the best television show you’ve ever watched? Extraordinary Attorney Woo had the most touching story to me.

What do you believe is your weirdest habit? I take my breakfast biscuits apart to eat each thing individually.

What color are your parents’ eyes? They both have brown eyes.

Have you ever had a surgery before? Yeah, tubes put in my ears and a pilonidal cyst removed. I'm also being put to sleep to get my wisdom teeth taken out; there's simply no fucking way I can stay calm through it with my newfound fear of the dentist. I very barely stayed calm during my last filling.

Would you rather visit the Taj Mahal or the Eiffel Tower? Taj Mahal.

Was your mom over 30 when she had you? Yes.

Who is your 4th phone contact and how do you know them? Dad, and well... he's my dad.

Have you ever lived in a dorm? No.

Do you live in an apartment? No.

What’s the story behind your most noticeable scar? I passed out in the bathroom directly onto my chin.

Have you ever SERIOUSLY considered any kind of plastic surgery? I am very serious about getting loose skin removal on at LEAST my stomach if/when I lose all the weight I want to, and a breast lift also because of the effects of extreme weight loss.

What was the last thing you cleaned and why? My desk, because it was quite the mess.

Does blood make you queasy? No.

What physical features can you just not stand about yourself? My weight in literally every part of my body. How dark and thick and obvious my leg hair is. Cellulite and stretch marks. How insanely dry my skin is everywhere. I have absolutely zero ass. Because of my weight I developed sagging breasts. I could go on and on and on still but I'd really prefer to stop upsetting myself.

What is your favorite crayon color? I like hot pink ones.

Have you ever snorted cocaine? No and I absolutely never will.

Where is the scariest place you’ve ever been? In a bus-like... truck thing that carried me and other mental hospital inmates (some that were VERY unstable and aggressive) in full-body restraints to the local courthouse to argue about our expected stay lengths. If I hadn't argued, I would have been in this specific hospital for months. That whole experience, getting there and talking to the judge, was one of the scariest things I've ever done.

Do you like string cheese? No.

What state/province/country is to the west of your own? Tennessee.

Were you breastfed as a baby? Yes.

What is the cutest baby animal in general? Maybe I'm biased, but meerkats; they're cute when they're born, but pups become absolutely precious once their fur grows out and they open their eyes. I also really love kittens.

Do you find it difficult to tell others what you want for Christmas? Unless you're my mother, yes. Well, I'm even kinda uncomfortable telling Mom, but she's very insistent on us kids telling her straight-up what we want.

Do you enjoy literature from the past or more recent times? I'm perfectly capable of liking both; I don't have a preference. A good, strong story is a good, strong story.

Do you know anyone who plays World of Warcraft? Do you play? *raises hand* Girt also used to play, but it's not his thing anymore. My former roommate Jacob played, too, but he doesn't now (I know because we're friends on there and you see when they log on). I'm absolutely positive I have other gamer friends who have in the past too, just from like, contextual Facebook posts and stuff.

Have you ever been called a nerd? Yeah, but just playfully and not at all with degrading intent.

What is something that you do not like that everyone else seems to love? Manicures and pedicures come to mind. They make me uncomfortable. Oh, and the beach.

Do you enjoy poetry? I really do. I'd love to start writing it again... I even have poem concepts saved in my phone notes, I just haven't written them. I'm always so afraid of it not coming out how I want.

Have you ever written a poem? Oh, loads since middle school.

Do you own any fingerless gloves? Haha I sure do, all the way back from high school... They're still in my top drawer. I barely ever wear them anymore, though; they don't fit as well but also when I tried a few on the last time, I thought I looked pretty childish. I don't at all think fingerless gloves in general are, I think they're hot as fuck, but these ones just didn't look right on me anymore.

Last time you went out to eat, where did you go? We most recently went to McDonald's a good few days ago.

Tell me about the last animal you touched. My cat, Roman. <3 He's my literal shadow - he goes where I go almost without fail, unless he really feels like napping in bed. He's a COMPLETE cuddlebug that very, very obviously adores me/his mama and he's everything to me, too. ;_; <3 He is SUPER shy around strangers, like he will run and hide under our bed the moment he thinks he hears someone at the door, and it takes seeing you MANY many times before he's cool with you; like it took Girt months to earn his trust, and he comes over regularly. He is such, such a loving cat though once he's into you. Oh, and also very bossy, lol. He has such a personality.

Have you ever witnessed a birth? I've only seen cats give birth from my childhood; I absolutely fucking refuse to witness a human birth, I will not make it through it still conscious, and I also DO NOT understand the "oh but it's beautiful!" argument, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck no it isn't. I don't even like seeing videos of animals doing it, but it is slightly more bearable.

Have you ever known something that no one knew you knew? Uh, maybe?

Your thoughts on bacon? I like it, so long it's not mega crunchy or burnt.

Out of the 7 deadly sins, which are you most guilty of? Sloth.

Ever held a newborn animal? Kittens, yes.

Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Yes; Roman's is a light blue, and Cookie's is... wow, I don't remember, but I'm pretty sure pink.

Why do girls go tanning when it just makes them look orange? Because girls can do whatever the fuck they want with their own bodies.

What is the last thing you searched for online? "What is a revenant" haha, I've heard it plenty in fantasy material but I never really learned what it was.

Do sluts make you mad? lol no???????? If a person engages in a lot of completely consensual - and safe - sex and isn't keeping it a secret from a partner or something, that's whatever. If the person is open about it and takes care of their safety, that's their goddamn business that they shouldn't feel shitty about. Get mad over something that actually matters.

If you could live for a year with any foreign family, where would you go? Germany. If I hadn't had a boyfriend I refused to leave, I would've loved to do that in high school.

Think of a friend you know; how would you feel if they kissed you? I wouldn't be okay with anyone who is just a friend kissing me because I'm in a monogamous relationship. I would also probably stop that friendship because I expect my friends to respect my relationship. I don't think a kiss on like, the forehead or something from a close friend comforting me or something like that would upset me, but on the lips would.

Do you have bills to pay yet? No. Something Colleen once said that haunts me to this day is the claim that I'm never going to know what it's like to get my first paycheck and pay my own bills.

Will you be changing your hair any time soon? I desperately need a trim, so I hope I can at LEAST do that soon... but I can't afford to put money aside to dye it when I'm saving for my tattoo, no matter how badly I want it dyed.

Does your mom have a celebrity look-alike? I don't think so. There is, however, a deceased celebrity who had her exact first and last name, and people her age would sometimes point out how cool it was.

Why don’t girls like porn? ... Many... do...? I personally don't just because I have no interest in seeing two random people have sex, but that's just me.

Do you think it’s pretty when 100s of balloons are let loose into the sky? I don't even think about whether it's pretty or not, because I find it extremely, extremely upsetting. Those balloons end up as litter, and many animals even get wrapped up in the strings. If I'm not mistaken, in the ocean, some sea life mistake the deflated balloons as jellyfish and even ingest them. Don't fucking do this shit.

[avintagekiss24]

Hi! I don't want to start anything on here and am always willing for civil conversations. At this point there's so much I've found out about Seb (besides the video he liked, the tommy lee thing, and the girlfriend thing) that I feel so guilty if I would continue to support him. I love him sm but it just doesn't look good rn. He is associated/follows an organisation (for helping veterans) that has posted a blue lives matter flag picture and who's co-founder has sexual assault allegations against him, and worked with him in 'The last full measure'. His friend Paul Walter Hauser has done blackface in the past, and when called out on it he just listed a few people that also did blackface. There's more, I found a discussion on here that I can link. I seriously don't support "cancel culture" bc I don't think it helps anyone but there are just a lot of 'mistakes' and shady people that can be linked to Seb, I wish it wouldn't be that way. I honestly don't know what to think about it anymore.

Hi! I’m also open to having civil conversations and I don’t believe you’re trying to start anything. I really do think this situation of dragging up a four year old video and taking it completely out of context is harmful not just to Black people, but to fandom/activism in general. This is gonna be long because I’m going to take your points one by one, and I want to preface this by saying that I will not answer any derogatory, sideways asks pertaining to this subject. I will delete every single one and will block your silly ass. I’m not going to argue with people who think I’m blindly supporting Sebastian because I’m just trying to get fucked by him, or people who think I hate myself and am trying to appease some white man.

So, on with the discourse!

The video he liked - this video was taken completely out of context and that is my main issue with this whole situation. It was not a video of a white man saying that he thinks he should be able to say the n word as everyone claimed it was. They were quickly debating on whether or not it's okay to say in rap lyrics. He was told no, that's not okay, that's never okay and they moved on from it. That's it. End of story. That somehow was twisted into a click bait style headline of "Sebastian Stan likes a video of a white man defending his right to say the n word" when that is absolutely not true. My other issue is that people are more upset that Sebastian liked the video than they are about the white man in the video literally saying the n word. So, do you really care about the use of the n word like you're claiming? Cuz if you do, you'd be more upset at the white man that said the word than you would be about the white man simply liking the video. Or, are you just using this as an excuse to grandstand against a white man you don't like?

The Tommy Lee thing - Sebastian Stan playing Tommy Lee does not make Sebastian Stan a bad person. Is Charlize Theron a bad person for playing Aileen Wuornos, a prostitute who started murdering men? Is Leonardo DiCaprio a bad person for playing a slave owner? Is Edward Norton a bad person for playing a nazi sympathizing racist? Actors play bad people. That doesn't mean that they themselves are bad people. 1990's Tommy Lee was a bad person, but that should have no bearing on who Sebastian Stan is or his character as a man.

The gf/Paul Walter Hauser thing - Why are we holding Sebastian accountable for what the people around him are doing? Again, why are we more upset that Sebastian is associated with people who have done questionable things than the specific people themselves? I'm not going to speak on the kimono wearing -- I'm not Asian. It's not my place to say whether or not its offensive because it's not my culture, but she posted that picture and attended that party before she started dating Sebastian, quite possibly before she even knew him. Same with Paul. I think that black face thing was long before he knew Sebastian. Now, if Sebastian was defending these actions, going around saying "I think it's okay for white women to wear Kimono's" "I think black face is fine" "I think white people should be able to say the n word" then we'd have a different story, wouldn't we? But that's not what we have, and that's not what he is doing. He is not responsible for the things his friends do or have done in the past just because he's more famous than they are, and he is not required to speak on them. Let's put it this way -- would you be comfortable having to be responsible for something a friend of yours did before you knew them? Would you want to have to be forced to answer for your friend when you yourself had nothing to do with the questionable behavior?

The organization that supports the military/blue lives matter - Sebastian cannot control what message that foundation puts out and it does not mean that he is or is not pro-police himself. There is not enough concrete evidence -- if any evidence for that matter -- that Sebastian is a blue lives matter supporter. Did Sebastian donate before they put up the blue lives matter post? Or after? I don’t know, cuz I don’t follow him that closely, but if he donates before they come out with a particular stance, that means he should be held accountable for that? I know I donated to an organization once and they turned out to support something that i’m 100% against. That means I’m a bad person because I couldn’t see into the future? Another point, how can we be certain that Sebastian saw the blue lives matter post in the first place? I know I’m not online 24 hrs a day, I miss posts all the time and I’m just an average person. I make three or four tumblr posts a day, and I’m gone. I have to play catch up on social media, and even then, I still miss stuff. So I’m sure the same happens to a working actor. As for the co-founder, I don't know who this person is and would rather not get into any allegations against them because I don't want to trigger anyone who comes across this post. If Sebastian knows about these allegations, is a willing participant/supporter of this person then yeah, that's pretty shitty, but we don't know the inner workings of this friendship/acquaintance/work relationship. We don’t know how close they are or if they even still speak.

I’m a pretty big fan of Don Cheadle. He’s a stand up guy, he’s a great actor, he’s funny, he’s political and stands up for what he believes in and in a very public way. I support him. Don Cheadle is also friends with Chris Evans, RDJ, Mark Ruffalo, and Letitia Wright (just to name a few). Chris Evans has a bipartisan forum that highlights/promotes right wing politicians, RDJ defended Chris Pratt during the whole “he’s the worst Chris in Hollywood” crap, who’s technically done black face, and who once said to a female reporter “nice tits” when she walked into the room, Mark Ruffalo just walked back his support of Palestine, and Letitia Wright retweeted/supported an anti-vaxxer/anti-trans Pastor who equated an ingredient of the covid vaccine to the devil because it contained some parts of the word Lucifer. Does that mean Don is now a bad person because he’s friends with these people? Why isn’t he getting any heat for his friendships with them? Why isn’t he being held accountable for what they’ve done and said? Oh right, because he’s not a white fave. So people don’t care one way or the other, which brings me to my next point. 

I can guarantee you that if Sebastian’s gf or Paul or this co-founder were not associated with Sebastian in any way, nobody would give a shit about her wearing a kimono, about Paul doing black face, or about the co-founder/organization being blue lives matter supporters and in that lies the actual problem. Being critical of people and their actions should be consistent and should happen all the time -- not just when they interact with your white fave. That’s when it becomes performative and looks like you just want to be able to show internet people that you follow/support/stan unproblematic celebrities, when really, you don’t care.

I think the moral of this post is that I think it's unfair to hold a complete stranger to a standard that I cannot hold myself to. I also don't view celebrities the way most teenagers/twenty somethings do, and that’s because when I entered fandom we didn't have social media, so I grew up with a wall between myself and said celebrities. There is no wall now with the presence of social media. "Fans" nowadays have a weird ownership feeling over celebrities because they can read their personal thoughts or view personal pictures and think that they have this personal quasi-friendship with them. I can't get on board with that. I prefer having the wall and I still keep the wall.

If supporting Sebastian makes you uncomfortable, then by all means, stop supporting him. Just make sure you are making this decision for yourself based on credible sources and concrete evidence and that you're not letting this fake woke activist mob make you feel uncomfortable. Internet activism means nothing unless you put your money where your mouth is in your real life and 90% of the social justice internet warriors do not. Real activism is bigger than changing your avi to a black square.

[familyfriendlyweed]

late night snaps (quackity x reader)

a/n : before we get into the story, i wanted to thank you all for such support on my first post - i only posted it yesterday, and got a hell lot of likes and reblogs and even gained 23 followers, which is insane for me (or maybe i just don’t know how tumblr works, haha)! anyhow, i’m really happy you guys enjoyed it <3 

 it was 02:37 and you were editing your newest video. you had no idea it would take so long, though! even if you were used to staying up very late, you knew you have to put away your laptop and go get some sleep. 

 saving the video as a draft and shutting your computer off, you started to blindly search for your phone, since your eyes didn’t get used to the darkness yet. finally finding it, you turned it on to set an alarm for the next morning when you suddenly saw a snapchat notification from ten minutes ago. it was from Alex. you curiously unlocked your phone and tapped the little notification to be led straight to snapchat.

idiota : hello mamacita

 your face instantly lit up in a childish smile. you started to type your response eagerly like it wasn’t 2 am and you didn’t have online classes tomorrow. 

 you : why hello there, el señor

 you saw Alex’s silly bitmoji pop up as he started to type.  

 idiota : what is my chica bella doing up so late?

 you giggled, getting comfortable in your bed - this meant a long chatting session on its way.

 you : YOUR chica bella? when did that happen?

 idiota : ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!! >:((((

 you : fine you big baby, i was finishing editing a new video

 idiota : hmm i see, i see

 you : what about you though? u should get some sleep!!! :(((

 Alex’s bitmoji started typing, then stopped for some reason. you lifted your eyebrow at that. then he continued, but it took a while for him to finish.

 idiota : why, i just couldn’t fall asleep when you were on my mind all the time, mi amor

 your cheeks grew red in an instant. you knew you could handle jokes pretty well, but this was quite too much. Alex never got so far as to actually flirt with you.

 you : eh??? what drugs are u on

 idiota : the only drug for me is you mamacita

 you snorted. you had no idea if he was being serious or not, even if the second option was more likely.

 you : literally go to sleep wtf

 idiota : i’d sleep better if you were by my side ;)

 this was enough for you - you felt as if you got one more message like this from him, you’d die from the hotness in your cheeks. setting your phone down, you made your way to the bathroom before bed.

 you came back five minutes later, only to see your phone full of notifications from Alex. your heart was thumping really hard, you weren’t used to this, but you opened snapchat anyway.

 idiota : mamacita?

 idiota : ....

 idiota : mamacita, don’t joke w me like that

 idiota : did you really just leave me on read wtf

 idiota : i’m sad come back :(((

 and at last, there was a snap from him. you were quite scared at this point. with a shaking hand, you opened it.

 you laughed so hard that you seriously thought you’ll have a seizure. still laughing, you snapped a selfie with a cute filter on (you really thought you looked horrible at the moment), captioned it with “your chica bella had to take a piss u simp” and sent it to Alex.

 he opened the snap almost imediatelly and started typing afterwards :

 idiota : mamacita!!!! you look hermosa!!!!

 you : that’s because i have a filter on lmaoo

 idiota : mamacita don’t let yourself down, you are so beautiful :((

 you started to text a sarcastic reply, but stopped. for some reason, Alex seemed like he was being truthful. he wasn’t joking around when he called you beautiful, that was too affectionate.

 you : ...really?

 idiota : si, si! <3

 you tugged at your lip in a thinking manner. true, you had feelings for Alex, but you never thought he had something similar to you. or maybe... maybe he was just supporting you as a friend. figuring that was probably it, you texted :

 you : thank you quacker B]] ur also v handsome

 idiota : mamacita likes me!!!!!😍😍😍

 you smiled sadly. Alex was definitely playing around. you got lost in thought for a few moments, thinking about how would he act if he was actually in love with someone. would he, perhaps, be more mature? that would be very weird to look at.

 finally coming back to planet Earth, you looked at your phone only to see that Alex has written a shit ton of messages again :

 idiota : i want to see you, mamacita

 idiota : it’s fine if u don’t want to, you’re probably going to sleep anyway...

 idiota : but maybe let’s meet tomorrow?

 idiota : mamacita?

 idiota : ....

 idiota : i’m coming over <3

 your heart gave a leap of embarassment and surprise. why would he even say that?

 you : wait what

 you : wdym “i’m coming over”

 you : no tf ur not

 you : go to sleep

 idiota : doesn’t mamacita want to see muah???

 you : no, that would be awesome, but you should go to sleep, really :(

 idiota : y/n, i already told you, i can’t sleep when you’re on my mind

 you froze in spot, staring at your screen for what felt like an eternity. did he just call you by your name? you knew he only says it in serious situations. deciding to change your tactic, you started texting seriously :

 you : are you like... for real now?

 you : because i know you call me by my name in serious situations, but maybe it’s only a prank, so just answer me truthfully, okay?

 Alex started typing, it took even longer that before, but at last you saw his message, this time without caps, spammed question/exclamation marks, nothing silly at all :

 idiota : i am serious, y/n. believe me, this is not a prank. i just really wanna see you. 

 your heart skipped a beat or two, your face renewed its redness. you felt as if you were dreaming.

 you : okay... i’m really glad. come over, please

 idiota : thank you so much

 you started pondering in your head - how did this happen? how did this silly conversation turn out like this? 

 but what if Alex texted you because he wanted to come over in the first place? after all, he knew how shitty your sleep schedule was. that would be awesome, you thought, a small smile dancing on your lips.

 you checked the snap map only to see Alex about 100 meters from you. wait... what? 100 METERS??? was Alex near your place the moment he texted you for the first time?

 you jumped up, starting to tidy up your messy room up, only to remember you look like poop at the moment - hair messy, face tired, clothes scrunched. 

 exhaling heavily, you tried to change your appearance quickly - you ran into the bathroom, brushing your hair panickily. then you wrenched the makeup bag open and started to rummage through it trying to find some mascara or something...

 ding ding! 

 you froze, your eyes widened. he was already here, what the hell?!

 you quickly put on some mascara, ran into the hallway while brushing your face with your hands from stress (completely forgetting you have mascara on, somehow) and unlocked the door.

 Alex’s figure was dark, since the lightbulb in the corridor wasn’t working, and it almost gave you a fright. but as soon as he engulfed you in a warm hug, the tension in the pit of your stomach vanished. you hugged him back almost unsurely, but smiling.

 “hello, mamacita”

 you giggled. for some reason, you got the strongest urge to cry. probably from happiness, but it still was confusing to you. nevertheless, tears started running down your cheeks, mixing with mascara, probably making you look like you were going to a halloween dress up party. 

 “hey, why are you crying?” Alex asked, brushing a strand of hair from your face.

 “i look horrible.” you laughed, wiping your tears away.

 “nooo, why won’t you listen to me? i already told you you’re beautiful.” he said with a cute pout. 

 “alright, alright, i’m very beautiful, let me down now.” you said, noticing that he was still holding you in his arms tightly. 

 “whatever the chica bella says.”

 he put you down.

 “aren’t you going to turn on some light? i feel like i’ve gone blind!” Alex exclaimed jokingly and you giggled.

 “i’m like a bat, i hate much light, sorry. buuuut i could turn on this little lamp.” you said, making your way to your desk and turning on a cute little lamp the shade of warm pink.

 “perfect.” Alex said, eyeing you in light now. you thought he’ll make a comment about your awful mascara-stained face, but he said nothing, just smiling and looking at you in awe, like you were some princess in a ball dress instead of a tired college student in messy shorts, an oversized t-shirt and two different socks, because you couldn’t find a pair of the same ones.

 “perfect.” he repeated, shrugging with a smile on his face, like seeing you was everything he needed.

 you laughed and hugged him, muttering a “thanks for coming”. Alex didn’t hesitate and also hugged you, holding you as close as possible, as if he let go of you, he’d drown and would never come back to be by your side again. 

 little did you know, he felt the exact same way.

[bonny-kookoo]

Good Girl [J.JK x Reader]🔞🌼

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, a lil angst

Warnings: dom/sub dynamics, dom!jungkook, sub!Reader, size kink, oral (f & m rec.), mild dd/lg themes, praise kink, cumplay, reader is a virgin, jungkook is lowkey a hoe, a lil heartbreak, Taehyung makes an appearance, long haired jungkook, mentions of harrassment, jungkook punches a guy, strength kink

Jeon Jungkook was known to have a specific type when it came to his partners; tall, gorgeous, dominant and older. It's not like he's a true blood baby boy; he's just too lazy to put any effort into his flings. When a new girl answers to his ad online searching for a roommate for his apartment to share rent and space however, he didn't quite expect such an innocent being to turn up at his doorstep with a box full of pastel colored belongings, ready to move in. And what he definitely didn't expect was his growing interest in her and the feeling of having her under him, all submissive and ready to be ruined.

Good Girl || Sweet Girl || Smart Girl || Brave Girl || Pretty Girl || Charming Girl || Enticing Girl || Bad Girl || ???

A wink was all he got from the woman who'd occupied his bed together with him last night as she walked out his bedroom door, seemingly knowing how to get out of his apartment. Jungkook ran his hand through his still sweaty hair, groaning after stretching his arms above his head, his mood seemingly sunkissed. He just finished an almost three hour sex-session after all; all without him providing any actual effort. His dick had seemed to be enough for her anyways, her face when she rode him happy, although he could really care less.

Reaching for his laptop near his bed, he didn't bother to put on any clothes for now, just wanting to check if he'd gotten any new E-Mails or messages, clicking through the casual nudes that constantly seemed to slip into his postbox. He cocked his head to the side however when he noticed that a website has notified him of an answer to his ad online; he'd put it up some time ago now after Taehyung, his former roommate, had to move out simply because Jungkook himself couldn't survive the older one's sleep shedule. Tae seemed to never sleep, waking the younger one up on a daily (and nightly) basis. He really tried to get along with him, both of them sharing a deep friendship, but god no, as a roommate he couldn't stand that guy. His rent however was something he struggled as well, so as much as he really wanted to live alone, he couldn't. He clicked the message on the website, his interest peaked.

"Hello. Is this AD still up to date? My name is Y/N, and I'm searching for a place because I'm starting to work close by soon, and its too expensive to take the bus for hours on end every day.. so uh, I don't know? I'm really good at cooking, and I promise I'll be so quiet and organized you won't even notice I'm there! I work at a restaurant nearby as a waitress- I mean, I'm going to, haha. Ugh, I hope you're okay sharing your apartment with a girl as well, I for my part don't have a problem with that! So, I guess, I'll wait for your reply?

Have a nice day!"

He scoffed a little, hovering over the delete button, but instead, he clicked her profile icon, opening the details. Her profile picture showed a white big dog, being hugged by what he assumed was her. He couldn't see her face however, half of her face above her nose cropped out to fit the entire dog instead. He could spot her clothes however; a top and skirt, flat shoes and sheer tights with white spots on them. His brows furrowed, how old was she? Her profile said she was about a year younger than him, every post she'd made up to this date about pet stuff, clothes who all seemed to follow a pastel-color scheme, and artwork you seemed to be selling. You were basically the definition of cute.

Fan-fucking-tastic. Hopefully you wouldn't be too upset when he denied your request, but somehow he thought it over. You said you could cook and you did seem like an organized person. Knowing what kind of effect he could have on people, he could probably scare the shit out of you and keep you around without really having to interact much; and rent was also due this month, so the sooner he found a roommate the better. "Fuck it." He said, and began to type his reply.

When his doorbell rang, he almost burned his hand with the hot water he currently used to make himself a cup of ramen, cursing loudly. Who the fuck wasn't home again so he had to take their package in? One day the old lady across the hall would find a dead rat or something in front of her door, he swore to himself. Ripping the door open with so much force he could feel a bit of wind gushing by, his eyes widened when he saw a similar face in front of him- well, a little below actually. He remembered your lips instantly for some awkward reason, having tried to maybe paint a picture of what you looked like entirely over the last few days. He would've never expected something like this however- you looked like a literal doll in his opinion, your eyes wide open and mouth a little parted, shiny lipgloss making him swallow. Wait, did he really forget that you said you wanted to move in today?!

"I uh.. I'm- I'm Y/N, we- I- the ad..?" You said, your voice sounding nothing like the woman he usually was around. He smirked a little, moving so you could step inside, food now definitely forgotten on the kitchen counter. He really should've at least cleaned up a little he thought. Whatever.

"Yeah, figured. There you go, thats your room. The keys and shit are on the matress, make sure you don't loose 'em." He simply said, before leaving you alone in your new home to settle down.

"What I'm trying to say is, Y/N, you and I, this could really be something!" Taehyung slurred into your ear, loud enough for Jungkook to hear. For some reason it pissed him off to no ends how close the older one seemed to be, constantly hitting on you like he was a starving man, even know half of town knew very well that he wasn't. He could see why; you were innocent, and Tae known to fool around a lot. You were a challenge, something new for him, and he would lie if he said that he wasn't interested as well. Oh he was; but he also had at least some manners left inside of him, contrary to popular belief not only thinking with his dick. Taehyung however was only out for fun, making Jungkook question if he should really let this continue.

He decided no.

"Alright you fucking whore, it's bedtime isn't it? I'll call you a cab." Taehyung groaned at the younger one's words, nodded his head however before looking at you with a smirk.

"Ah, what a shame. But if you wanna have some fun you know my number!" He said, as if he didn't just offer you sex. You blushed at this, not answering, making Jungkook watch you a bit. You really were something else. "Jungkookie, you're so nicee... If I was gay I would definitely suck your dick-" The younger in question made a disgusted yet amused face, putting a hand over the blue haired one's mouth.

"Yeah yeah, you pay me back though you fucker." He said, before going into the kitchen to make the call. Taehyung, being left alone with you again started with his questioning, as he had done the entire night.

"So, Y/N.." He said, dragging out the last syllable of your name playfully, making you shuffle around where you were sitting a bit. He certainly was a pretty attractive guy, but he also seemed to be very straightforward- something you always had struggled with, being more on the shy side. You looked at him, silently urging him to continue before taking a sip of your own beer- cherry flavored, simply because the regular was too bitter in your opinion. "What kind of toys do you use, heh?" He questioned, and you coughed suddenly. Taehyung laughed loudly at that, cooing when you calmed down slowly.

"Taehyung, stop harassing my roommate you fucking idiot. I need her to pay half of the rent-" He said, before sitting down next to you, raising one of his eyebrows at you. "And she also makes some killer lasagna. Kinda wanna keep that." He said, before laughing a bit. Even though Jungkook seemed to be pretty intimidating to you, he was actually a pretty good guy to have around. You both barely ever fought, and overall you could almost see yourself falling for him too- he had the looks after all. But his habit of bringing people over just to satisfy himself was something that made you keep some distance between you both. He wasn't someone to settle down- let alone with someone like you. You were pretty much the exact opposite of what he seemed to like.

Sending Tae home was easier than you both thought. Not being able to go to bed you both decided to watch some late night shows while casually talking- something that wasn't uncommon between you two. Just when you seemed to have gotten comfortable again, Jungkook couldn't help but tease you again.

"So, what Toys do you use, heh?" He said, laughing with his head thrown back afterwards at your red face. This would certainly never get old in his opinion. Just as he was about to apologize and tell you you didn't have to answer, your voice was heard, however.

"None." You said, and his eyes widened at that. "What? Do I look like I do these things to you?" You asked, and he cocked his head to the side a bit, scanning you obviously. He shrugged, and you began to pout, moving to wrap your pastel pink blanket around yourself. "I don't even know how to buy one. That stuff is just.. don't know. Gross." You said, and Jungkook turned on the couch, body facing you now, his interest sparked.

"Gross? So you never had sex before?" He said, and you went silent. Were you serious right now? You were an angel in his eyes, body proportions almost perfect, hell, even your slight imperfections were adorable in his eyes. Up until now he had been sure that you at least have had your fair share of experience, but a virgin? His world was suddenly turned upside down. "Well.. that's something I didn't expect." He said, making you raise your eyebrows at him. "You're hot. Thats why. Oh well." He said, missing the way your eyes widened at that. "I'm gonna go to bed now. Goodnight." He simply said, and you answered with a short 'goodnight' as well- still a bit surprised by his statement. Jungkook thought.. you were attractive?

He'd somehow gotten used to you, how you would leave your pastel pink but admittedly really soft blanket in a pile on one edge of the couch in the living room, how you sometimes left your toothbrush in the sink when you'd been in a hurry, or how you would hum to a song, not knowing he could hear you very clearly. Maybe he really did go soft after living with you for a while. He still didn't know himself why he got so upset with Taehyung the day prior; was he really being selfish? He was protecting you, nothing more. Taehyung was everything but a gentle lover, jungkook just knew he'd break you for sure, not to mention that you already stated how much you despised one night stands, which were practically Taehyungs speciality. He was just looking after you, nothing more.

The more he thought about it however, the more problematic the entire plan became.

But even now, while the young woman whose name he had already forgotten was giving it her all sucking his dick, all that seemed to swim around in his head were the events of the previous evening; how innocent and embarrassed you looked at him when you told him you'd never bought, let alone use a toy before. Surely you'd be someone to enjoy a good vibrator he thought, maybe as a gag he could buy you one? Oh how enchanting you'd look, spread out on his mattress while he would edge you over and over until you'd be crying, begging for his mercy. He would praise you for taking it so well, for being so good for him and only him, and he just knew you would blush. Instead of rushing to his own satisfaction, he would go slow, agonizingly slow, just to see how far he could push you. He would feast on you like a predator on his prey, pull you close so you had no chance of escaping him, he would trace every curve of your skin, gently, as if to make up for the bruises and Mark's he would surely leave all over you to feed his inner need to claim you, even though he would never let anyone see you like this while he was alive and breathing anyways. He just knew you would fit perfectly underneath him, his body covering you and shielding you away from the world around. Would you be able to take all of him? He probably would have to stretch you real good before even thinking about pushing his dick inside you, yet he just knows you would somehow make him proud and take it all, and he would continue his praises, telling you what a good girl you are.

He almost laughed at the situation, he really was in deep, wasn't he? Frustrated and confused he started to picture someone else entirely kneeled between his legs on the floor, how you'd bat your eyelashes at him like the fucking angel you were instead of the girl currently there, and that thought alone gave him the final push to shoot his load down the strangers throat, who moaned obscenely at the feeling. Usually he would be aroused, ready for more, but the sound of someone who wasn't his little roommate ripped him out of his daydream. This couldn't go on like that. Sending the lady out without many words, he decided that he just needed to fuck you, and all would be good again. He was just curious. Nothing else. He just needed to satiate his hunger and he could go back to normal.

How would he be able to do this without ending up hurting you? No matter how big his hunger for you was, he also considered you somewhat of a friend. He remembered when you came home crying one time after a bad day at work, and how he wanted to hold you, shielding you from any harm, making you feel safe. Because that's what he, and only he could do in his opinion. No matter what, he'd protect you, as weird as that sounded. Shit.

He really had a crush on you.

Unknowing to him you always held your hands over your ears whenever he brought home a different girl, not being able to listen to his moans mixed with someone else's. You were slowly beginning to regret moving in, already starting to think about maybe searching for a different apartment. But the rent was cheap, your room big, and his company relaxing when he wasn't busy being buried in someone he couldn't even remember after a day or two. Somehow tears were leaking out of your eyes, and you took your hands down from the sides of your head to wipe them away, careful to be as silent as possible as to not alert him that you were awake, well aware of the shower turning on. You did notice however how his sessions became shorter and shorter, always seeming to end sudden instead of usual. But the more you thought of it, the more angry at yourself for falling for this manwhore you became. You really should hate him- but you couldn't.

Tonight was definetely the prime example of why you didn't go into clubs. The sheer amount of people around you, the smell of sweat and cheap cologne and perfume all around made you feel like a headache was inevitable. Why were you here again? Oh yes. You followed Taehyungs advice and 'tried to make friends' instad of looming around your apartment all day. But right now you just really wished you stayed home instead of going here.

Sure, you liked your coworkers, and they seemed nice and everything, but if you were being honest, they're definition of fun was entirely not yours. You began to feel cramped up in the large club, making you desperately pull your phone out of your pocket, texting Jungkook in hopes he could save you from this god forsaken torment they called a club.

  Minutes later, after Jungkook oh so gentlemanly told you to pick you up, you stood in front of that said location, waiting for his cheap but admittedly nice car to pull up. Sadly, someone else seemed to be way more intent on bringing you home- a young man your age, attractive, yes, but also heavily intoxicated. He had already eyed you up inside the building you noticed, yet hadn't made a move towards you. Now however, he seemed more determined than ever.

"Lets go home baby, I swear you won't regret-" He started, but you moved away from him, clenching onto your little handbag in order to at least keep your belongings safe if he tried anything else. Suddenly both your figures were drowned in the warm light of Jungkook's car lights- you immediately recognized them simply by the fact that one was brighter than the other, something you always told him, yet he always waved you off, telling you that both were doing just fine, even though his left light was clearly almost dead. Typical him, you thought. Yet right now, you couldn't be happier to see him.

He however, did not seem happy at all. His face was serious, his wavy hair hanging a little over his eyes, steps fast and strong enough that you could hear his black boots almost crush the slight gravel of the parking lot. "Fuck off sunnyboy and go back inside." He simply yelled out, having already seen how uncomfortable you were with the stranger so close to you. Jungkook wasn't someone to blindly punch someone, that said however, he couldn't contain himself once he saw the guy reaching out for your arm, your figure instinctively scrambling to get behind Jungkooks way larger body. He didn't even notice his fist connecting with the strangers face, simply leading you by the small of your back inside his car, driving home without any more words.

You were not to be touched by someone so dirty like this young man who didn't even knew his own limits it seemed.

Yet you were completely confused now. Maybe, if you were now the reason he got into physical fights, you should make a decision.

The next morning, sitting down at the kitchen table, you watched Jungkook filling your bowl with cereal as well- lucky charms for you, and chocolate chips for him. It became somewhat of a routine since you both woke up roughly around the same time, sharing breakfast was common. The best moment in your opinion to pop the bomb.

"I'm moving out." You said softly, fiddling with your fingers in your lap, leg nervously bouncing up and down. Why did this feel like you were breaking up with him? You both would've ended up going separate ways sooner or later anyways- so he would probably just nod, ask when, and that would be it. He was someone who didn't bother much. But the second you said it, he turned around completely shocked, suddenly very much awake.

"Why? Did I do something?" He asked, sounding genuinely offended for some reason you couldn't come up with. In his mind, scenario over scenario started to play, as if he wanted to search for something he may have said or done to make you so upset that you didn't want to live with him anymore. He knew he shouldn't be so upset over it, since you and him were merely roommates, friends who shared an apartment, nothing more, but he never really expected you to come up with it so sudden. Or maybe you had a boyfriend? What if it was Taehyung, and you just didn't tell him? He would rip that fucker's stupid blue hair out, he knew-

"No. I- not reall-" You sighed, setting your elbows on the kitchen table before letting your head fall into your hands. "Actually yes, you did." You started, looking at him, but unable to hold eye contact with the now completely confused curly haired boy in front of you. "You.. uh.. I cant sleep. Your, 'guests', the walls aren't really soundproof and like, I really- and just.. ugh this is so awkward, please don't make me say it-" You said, groaning the rest of your sentence before stubbornly shoving your back against the chair, throwing your legs back and forth viciously, reminding Jungkook of a kid who was close to throwing a tantrum. Even though this was definitely not the time to think about you laid out over his leg, his hand hitting your perfectly shaped butt until it was red just to punish you for being such a brat, exactly this picture began to form in the back of his head. He hated himself somehow, really. But somehow instead of accepting your decision, he moved to stand at the table, hands on top of it, eyes searching yours.

"Say it Y/N. You know I hate when I have to pull thing out your throat sweetheart." He didn't intend on using the nickname, but somehow he threw his hesitation out the window. If you really were fooling around with someone, someone who wasn't him he wanted to know- and even if you didn't share that information with him, you would move out anyways, so why hold back anymore? You shook your head at him, avoiding his gaze, and he clicked his tongue, patience slowly thinning out. "Spit it out." He said again, but he still got no reaction. His hand seemed to move without his consent when he suddenly found his fingers on your chin, moving your head to force your attention towards him. "Speak the fuck up, I swear to god." He said, voice dropping down lower, and somehow you seemed as if bewitched.

Maybe it was the way he stood there, how he still held your chin, or how intensely he looked at you, but words dropped out of your mouth as if you drank harry potters truth potion. "I cant stand that you let these girls touch you, that they can get you so easily and you just look past me a- and I really tried you know, because Taehyung said you liked mature girls more so I tried to do that, but he lied to me, you don't notice me at all, you're so mean you-" He shut your mouth with his mouth, trying to process the information he just received, yet it seemed like it was too much at once. You were.. jealous? And what kind of stupid advice was Taehyung giving away, that fucker? It was true that he liked his women to be confident and mature, but that was just so they knew what they were doing, and he didn't need to put so much effort into something he could get so easily.

"So you were jealous?" He said, a small smirk creeping up on him, cooing at you internally when you shook your head, face red. "If you wanted me to fuck you, you could've just asked. Geez." He said, but instead of being relieved, your shoulders sagged down. "What?" He asked, and you mumbled to him.

"Because I don't want just that one time stuff you do." Jungkook looked at you, eyes softening at your somehow-confession. He just put together the pieces in his head, and it did make sense. You were practically attached to him wherever he took you, always seemingly glowing whenever his attention was on you. He was as much as a dense head than you were, and he couldn't help but pull out a chair and sitting down, patting his legs as an invitation.

"Good, because I don't want that either. And I don't share either." He said, and looked at you gently, but with a deep darkness behind his eyes. "Trust me baby, you can sit down now and I promise you'll be the only one to have me- or you can move out and go on with your life." He almost laughed at the way it suddenly clicked in your head on what he was offering, suddenly jumping up and sitting on his thighs, legs on either side of his body. He looked down at you, a divine picture coming to life. His hands were placed on the exposed skin under your skirt, slowly sliding over the soft skin until his fingers felt the seam of your tights- those goddamn things he'd wanted to rip off of you so badly these past days. "You can touch me, you know?" He said lowly, and you noticed how awkward you must've looked for a second, seated on his lap with your hands in front of you, unsure where to put them. Just to ground yourself, your fingers began to play with his shirt, and he had to swallow the laugh that wanted to break free. "You don't have to do this, you know? I'm fine with waiting-" He began, but you immediately shook your head, however, at loss for words. He smiled again, dangerously so you noticed. His head dipped down, finally touching your skin on your neck with his lips, leaving open mouthed kisses under your earlobe down to the crook, hands moving over your clothes already mapping out your body in his mind, one hand pulling down one side of your soft fleece jacket you wore, pulling down your shirt as well, so he could softly nip at your shoulder, making you gasp oh so cutely at his actions. His hands didn't stop however, moving over your chest, kneading both of your breasts softly, as if he would hurt you if he used too much strength- which was probably the case. He already loved how bis his hands looked running over your body, how your hands held his shirt in fists, eyes closed, yet not because of fear; you looked serene to him, face showing him the soft pleasure you felt. He suddenly moved you a little, making you straddle one of his leg, core pushed against his thigh. "Let's start slow, yeah?" He asked, whispering words into your ear, lips never parting from you. He slowly began to move your hips, urging you to simply follow what you thought felt best to you. "Use me baby. Get off on my thigh." You whined at that, slowly starting to move more and more boldly, and he decided that he was officially a goner. Even if you didn't want him after whatever may be happening, he knew he could never go back. The way you squeezed your eyes shut every now and then, moving back and forth yet always a bit helpless, showing how inexperienced you were. He could feel the wet patch forming on his jeans, his hands moving you a bit faster, before you let your head fall onto his shoulder, making him chuckle. "What is it baby? Do you need help, hm?" He said, a bit mockingly even, and you nodded into his shoulder. "Tell me what you need then. What do you want, princess?" He said, running his hands over your back, feeling your bodyheat through your clothes.

"wanna get the same.. as the others.." You mumbled, unsure what you were even asking for. Jungkook however simply smiled, suddenly lifting you up, hands under your behind carrying you to his room, before finally letting you fall onto his mattress, laughing when your body jumped a little, making you squeak so cutely. He smiled, crawling over you, his fantasy finally coming to life- you looked so lost under him, so utterly defenseless he could swear he could feel something primal awake inside him- and that was not his dick, which already strained against his jeans, impatient.

"Ah but Baby.." He began, taking off your soft jacket before his hands traced your bare arms until he moved them under your shirt, feeling your skin underneath his fingers. "You're my special girl.." He began to lift your shirt up, helping you out of it before he got rid of your skirt as well, chuckling at your cute lacey underwear, which was so typically you. So innocent, yet so arousing, how you squirmed underneath him in nothing but those pastel colored undergarments. "And special girls get special treatments.." His words were low, soft spoken yet with a rough edge to his tone, a natural feature of his voice that you've come to love. You couldn't even begin to paint out a picture of what he was talking about- sure, you have seen your fair share of adult films, you weren't a kid after all- but up until this moment, up until you met Jungkook, you've never really thought about what you could like when it came to these things. Even in your thoughts you felt shy saying any profanities out loud, how could you expect to know about kinks? "But only if you can behave for me, but you can do that right?" He said, unhooking your bra behind your back with ease and interrupting your inner talk with yourself. "You'll be my good girl, yeah?" He said, and you just viciously nodded, already growing frustrated, and oh how he loved it. This was how he had pictured you. If he had known before that this was what it felt like to have control over someone, he would've never done anything else if he was honest; but then again, you really were a special girl to him. The way you suddenly mewled when his hand cupped your heat, giving you a little pressure just to tease you even further almost caught him off guard. God have mercy on his soul, you were so sensitive to him, and it dawned on him again that he was making you this way. He was the first to- and he would make sure he'd be the only one as well. All those noises tumbling out of between your lips were only his to hear. His breathing peaked up at the view he had, how you began to impatiently rut into his hand, needy for more than he was giving you. He leaned back, finally getting rid of his own clothes as well to your satisfaction, lazily throwing his opened flannel as well as his white shirt somewhere on the floor in his room, and you couldn't help but stare. Truth be told, you didn't really know what to expect of him if you were honest, his constant gym visits giving you the impression that he had to be extremely fit, yet his habit of consuming more than two cups of ramen easily spoke differently. He was, in your eyes, the perfect in-between- he definetely was fit, his abs visible to your eyes, yet he didn't look like those over-achievers you sometimes saw walking around the same gym whenever you met him there to go home together. The way his muscles flexed at every move when he loomed over you again made you want to touch him, yet your shy side forbade you. He chuckled again. "You can touch what's yours all you want, you know?" He said, before he began to place his hand back onto your chest, his breath hot on your collarbone where he placed his kisses again, already hooked on your taste. His other, tattooed hand found its way back to your core, feeling the dampness there with amusement. You were more than what he'd imagined. Slowly he got rid of that barrier however, leaving your tights on for his own pleasure and maybe also for the aesthetic of it, his digits circling around your sensitive bud, making you squeal again, putting your hands over your mouth to keep your voice down. He clicked his tongue at this, moving them to lay right under the small of your back. "Be good and keep them there, yeah?" He said, and you looked away.

"But its- thats emb-" You couldn't even finish the beginning of your rant before he went back to his task at hand, sitting back before moving your legs to spread obscenely over his thighs simply to catch a glimpse of your glistening center, before he placed his body over yours again, hand now roughly circling in delicious eights around your clit, making you gasp out.

"Nothing you do is embarrassing, you hear me. If anything its fucking hot how you can be so fucking adorable even with my hand between your legs, doll." He said, before dipping a finger into you, making you move a bit at the foreign feeling. "Gotta stretch you out babygirl.." He said lowly, careful not to get too fast. His second finger joined in, and he could feel how tight you were around them, already clenching a bit as well, making his mouth water, but also growing a bit of worry in the back of his mind. Usually he was quite cocky about his overly average qualities down in his pants, but now he was genuinely concerned to hurt you with it. This was definitely a first for him. "Baby you're so small.. I don't think you can take it.." He said, a bit of a teasing undertone to his words as well. "See? You're already squeezing my fingers so hard princess, how could my dick ever fit inside huh?" He said, contrary to his otherwise rough nature keeping his movements gentle and slow enough for you to adjust without causing much pain. He could see the slight discomfort in your eyes, yet you suddenly shook your head, voice whiny.

"Uh-uh.." You mumbled, and he laughed a bit at that. "can take it.." You said bratty as ever, feeding his ego to no ends. "Wanna have it- you.. you gon' give it right? 'm good.." You said, having troubles keeping your hands under your back just like he told you to, grabbing the sheets underneath you instead to have something to keep yourself grounded.

Jungkook couldn't stop smiling. You didn't even know what you were asking for, yet you seemed so drowned in trust with him, that you simply gave him the right to do anything he wanted with you. "You sure?" He said, and smiled at the way you nodded again with your eyes closed. He moved away after that, shedding his pants before he walked over to his bedside table, fishing out a condom, before moving back to you, your eyes now on him, or more than that, on his very apparent bulge his boxers failed to conceal. Maybe you really did ask for more than you could take. Quite literally. Sensing your growing uneasiness he simply discarded his underwear, cock finally springing free, slapping soundlessly against his abdomen before he sat between your legs again. You made grabby hands for the foil package in his hands, somehow wanting to slip it onto him, yet he shook his head amused. "Nuh-uh baby. I'm afraid if you touch me right now I'll just embarrass myself and come straight away." He said, and you giggled at that. The sound of it brought him back at ease, his little joke having helped to calm you down at least a little bit. He knew this was a big thing, especially for someone like you- and it made him feel even a bit pressured if he was honest. He was slow when he dipped his head inside, your body instinctively trying to move away a bit, but you forced yourself to stay still, eyes now pressed close. Moving around a bit he kept one hand around the base of himself, the other steadying himself next to your shoulder, kissing you on your lips for the first time since you both started, surprising you enough to not notice how he somehow began to glide into you with the help of your arousal and the lubricant of the condom around him. He groaned, the first actual noise he'd made you could tie to his pleasure, and your breathing picked up once you noticed how full you felt. Gasping several times he suddenly started to laugh, making you giggle as well, even though you didn't knew what was so funny in that situation. "God- ugh.. your- fuck you're tight.." He pressed out, fighting hard against his hips' own mind yelling at him to move, to wreck you, to utterly ruin you. But he couldn't allow himself to do that- reassuring himself that he would have time for that at a later date. He slowly started to move around after he calmed down enough, keeping his speed down to keep it gentle for you. "I- fuck.." He started, having to talk to stretch his patience out, and to also ease your mild pain a little bit. "Let's- ugh.. Let's go on a date tomorrow, yeah? I.. god-" He said, and you nodded, moaning in your delicate pitch he oh so loved. "Gonna be all romantic and shit- fuck- gonna treat you like- for Mcdonald's or some shit." He said, making you both laugh between gasps of pleasure, your hands suddenly frantically moving around the sheets, legs shaking as he began to speed up his pace. You didn't knew what an orgasm would feel like, or how you knew you would have one, but you gasped, chocking on unshed tears in frustration as you noticed that you couldn't tumble over that delicious edge, and Jungkook noticed, cooing at you. "Ah, my baby can't come without her little clit being touched?" He said, kissing the side of your neck, biting the skin teasingly before sucking a hickey on your collarbone, his hands now grabbing yours, fingers intertwining with his, before moving them around his neck, sensing how you wanted to be closer to him, even though that hardly seemed possible. "Come for me baby, you can do it." He said, kissing your shoulder as if to make up for his mark he'd left, his hand now reaching between your bodies, only needing to put a bit of pressure on your little nub to send you flying. You moaned out loud, uncaring on how you sounded, clinging onto him for dear life, his own release making him groan out as well.

He could feel your body trembling, your breathing still fast. He waited for a moment or two for himself to soften up so he could pull out gently- your still slightly clenching hole almost pushing his dick out of yourself. You whined at the empty feeling, and he hushed you gently, moving around so he was sitting up against his headboard, your body on his lap, head on his shoulder. His hand moved back and forth over your spine, the other keeping your body steadily against him. "You did so, so good baby." He gently whispered between your breaths still coming out a little faster than they should. "To be honest I actually was kind of worried you wouldn't be able to take it. I'm impressed princess." He said, making you giggle. You still weren't quite back yet, still bathing in your own afterglow, and he simply waited for you to calm down- slowly becoming aware of your surroundings again.

"Hey, Jungkookie.." You started with that nickname Taehyung always teased him with, yet you would get away with it anytime on his watch. He simply moved his head to look at you, even if you weren't at him. "Did you.. like, mean it? Are we.. a couple now, or?" You started a bit too softly, yet you didn't have to be scared of his answer to that.

He took a deep breath, before yawning a bit. "If you want us to be. I know I want to." He started, brushing some hair away from your eyes. You looked at him, big eyes so innocent like he didn't just fuck you into his mattress literally minutes ago.

"I want to!" You immediately said, making him chuckle and place a kiss on your nose, receiving a giggle at that, before you tensed up. He raised his eyebrows at that, before you looked at him surprised. "My legs are all- tingly.. Jungkook did you break me- HEY don't laugh!" You said, but he couldn't help himself.

He threw his head back, laughing his admittedly cute open laugh, before wrapping his arms around your body. "God I love you." He simply said, making you smile.

"Hey Jungkookie?" You said after a bit.

"Yeah Princess?" He answered.

"That McDonald's date still stands, right?" You said with a small voice, making him snort.

"Anything you want princess. Anything you want."

Taglist:

@mrcleanheichou @sugasbratz @sassysaxsolo @bananagukkie @wh3resangel @urmomgee

[hopelesshawks]

Ash and Dust Part 7- Opportunities

18+ Dabi x fem!reader

Summary: You first meet Dabi on the worst night of your life after unwittingly walking into the very bar the League of Villains made infamous. That should probably be the end of the story. You stumble on the remnants of one of the most infamous terrorist groups in the history of Japan, get viciously murdered or call the cops and get them arrested, the end. Except that’s not the end of the story. It’s only the beginning.

Masterlist Help Lulu (Kofi)

Waking up the morning after reclaiming your bedroom (at least in part) is jarring for two reasons.

The first is that you’re waking up next to Dabi.

For some reason you thought he might wake up before you, even though he’s pretty routinely demonstrated that he’s not an early riser. Perhaps you expected the knowledge that he was sleeping in the same bed as you to perturb him enough to get him up early. Instead your eyelashes had fluttered open to find him still deeply asleep with his face only a few inches from yours.

You fully intended on simply rolling over to either fall back asleep or get on with your day but you’d found yourself enthralled with his sleeping face instead. You know Dabi’s smirks, sneers, and scowls like the back of your hand after a little over a month of living with him. His resting face, however, is entirely foreign to you. You’ve never had a moment alone with him where he wasn’t antagonizing you and it’s odd to see him so peaceful. Your eyes trace over his face, taking in the extent of the scarring on his jaw and beneath his eyes, but also appreciating the unmarred expanses of skin as well. It strikes you that Dabi is pretty. It shouldn’t be surprising considering what you’ve seen of the youngest Todoroki in the press but even still. In another world where he’d never become the wanted criminal he is today, you wonder if he’d be a heartbreaker or a sweet, gentle type. Would he be as quiet and polite as his brother seems to be or would he still get a thrill from bantering with someone who isn’t afraid to banter right back? Would he be in the tabloids with a different girl every week or settle down early with his high school sweetheart? You’re fascinated by the idea of what the scarred man before you would be without the tragedy and the trauma. You might’ve sat there just taking him in until he woke up if not for the second reason waking up that morning was so jarring.

Your phone has been pinging literally non-stop.

You’ve never resented your notification sound more as its shrill tone continues to echo in your room, putting the fragile peace at risk. Even before you found yourself as alone as you are now your phone was never this busy. As much as you try to ignore it and wait for the tidal wave of what you assume are spam notifications to end, the sound finally drives you to turn over and grab it. Your eyes widen as you take in the sheer amount of Twitter notifications you have. As you unlock your phone and navigate over to the app your mentions are literally flooded with Deku fans screaming about your talent and how lucky you are. It’s a confusing litany of fangirling that you try to weed through until you get to one mention in particular that makes your breath catch in your throat.

You got a mention from the rising hero himself.

Holy shit.

You’ve never clicked a tweet so quickly in your entire life. Not only are you stunned to find he’s seen and loved your work but he also mentions wanting to talk if you’re interested. Sure enough, when you navigate over to the messages section of the app, a feature you’ve never bothered to use, you notice a message request from Midoriya ‘Deku’ Izuku waiting for you. It takes everything in you not to scream as you read the message there over and over before finally hopping out of bed and moving to the kitchen to call the number he’d left you. It’s a little endearing that he’d been so quick to hand out his number to a complete stranger on the internet but you also can’t help but wonder how someone so naive could be the same man drawing headlines over his heroics and combat skill. You’re not exactly a Deku fangirl but it’s still wild to be dialing a celebrity’s number as you punch in the numbers and then wait for it to ring.

On literally the second ring the phone is answered. “Pro Hero Deku at your service! Who’s calling?” the young man answers chirpily. “Uhh, this is (y/l/n)? You messaged me on twitter?” “Oh! Right! Yes! Hello! One second!”

You can hear Deku excusing himself from whatever room he’s in, a disgruntled voice mumbling something you can’t hear, causing Deku to reply with a hushed “Sorry Kacchan! I’ll be right back!” before there’s more shuffling and finally the sound of a heavy door closing.

“Ok I’m back! Thanks for reaching out to me so quickly!” he finally says now that he’s, apparently, in a better place to talk.

“Yea, of course I guess I’m just shocked you liked my art so much and really appreciate you drawing so much attention to it,” you explain, feeling short of breath at how surreal the situation is.

“Of course! You’re really talented! Your work deserves to get attention!”

“Thank you but, uh, why exactly did you want me to call you?”

“Right! It’s about your artwork.”

“Ok?”

“I want to sell it!”

“What?”

“Wait well no not sell it. Or not sell that particular piece although it is a nice piece and if you wanted to theoretically you could probably sell it although I guess it’s available for free online already so maybe people wouldn’t want to pay for it. Although it’s a painting right? And people buy or pay to go see paintings you can see online all the time so maybe it wouldn’t be too bad but if it’s for your own enjoyment you may not want to give it up which would be totally understandable and also how would that work logistically? If the painting is rather large it may be unwieldy to try and ship it to whoever purchases it, in which case would you have to meet up to try and give it to them by hand? But then that necessitates meeting up with a complete stranger on the internet and what if the person who buys it doesn’t live near you or, since it is the internet, doesn’t even live in Japan? Then you have to contend with international shipping and-”

“Uhh, Deku?” you ask cautiously, barely able to process the mumbling of the young man on the phone.

“Ah! Sorry! I can kinda end up on tangents sometimes... What I mean to say is that I’m not trying to sell the painting you posted or anything but I think you’re really talented as an artist and one of my friends is looking for someone to design a new merch collection.”

One of his friends? Your mind instantly starts running through his impressive list of ex classmates. Your first thought is Dynamight and immediately you shudder at the idea. He may be years younger than you but the aggressive pro hero still scares the shit out of you. Uravity could be an interesting hero to work with although you’re not quite sure you vibe with her aesthetic. Or maybe he’s talking about the new Ingenium?

“You’re real fucking loud in the mornings, you know that Doll?” Dabi asks with a groan as he comes walking into the room with a stretch.

You hurry to shush him, not wanting to lose the opportunity being presented to you, which earns you a curious look. Before you can react Dabi is snatching your phone out of your hand and putting it on speaker. You don’t dare protest verbally and risk alerting Deku of the situation so you have to settle for glaring at Dabi as he smirks at you.

“Yea so, anyway, Shouto really needs new merch but wanted something a little more sophisticated on the designs and I feel like you’d be perfect for that you know? Making all his stuff mini works of art. So what do you say?” Deku asks, his voice still brimming with that same enthusiasm while your blood runs cold. You’re genuinely scared to look up at Dabi’s face to see what he thinks about the idea of you working with his little brother. You hold your breath, Deku’s chipper voice going nervous as he asks “Hello? You still there?”

To your immense surprise, when you finally have the courage to bring your eyes up to meet Dabi’s, he’s got an almost feral grin. “You better take the fucking job,” he hisses delightedly, sending a chill down your spine as you stutter out a response to Deku, your eyes never leaving Dabi’s.

“Yea, sorry just processing. I’d, uh, I’d be happy to help out.”

“Great! I’ll pass your number on to Shouto and you two can meet up and figure out details!”

“Ok.”

“Cool, thanks (y/l/n)! Hopefully I’ll see you around!”

You hum noncommittally before hanging up the phone, still waiting for the other shoe to drop as you practically watch the gears turning in Dabi’s head.

“You’re…. Not mad I’m going to be working with your brother?” you ask cautiously.

“Oh no, I’m fucking delighted Doll. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because you’re gonna help me have a little fun.”

A/N: We are finally starting to get to the meat of the story omg. I’m sorry this fic has been so slow going, especially compared to my others, but if you stick with I’m pretty sure it’ll be worth it. I appreciate each and every one of y’all that’s been reading this fic because main motivation to write it has been hard

Taglist: @thechroniclesofawriter @simpsfortodoroki @ahtsuwu @oliviasslut @larkspyrr @oikawaandkuroostan @tina-98 @vibesdontlie @clubfairy

[let-this-ship-sink-already]

Where to start…

(I have been silent the past two days, because I had to think things through for myself.)

Let me say, that I have absolutely nothing against Tom and Zendaya as a couple. If they find happiness in one another, that’s amazing for them and I wish them nothing but the best.

Do I believe it‘s legit? No, I don’t.

Could it be PR? Yes, it could.

Could it be, that they are in a relationship, that they now use for PR? Yes, it could.

Do I know? No, I don’t.

I always only state my opinion.

A little background info:

The reason I became a fan of Tom all these years ago, was, that he is not only an amazing actor with lots of potential but also an amazing human being. He always came across as very humble and grounded. I love how he did not give up his life in London to become this big celebrity/actor in Hollywood. He repeatedly stated, that he is not a tabloid person, that this part of fame does not appeal to him, followed by the statement, that he is a very private person and he would do anything, to keep certain parts of his life away from his public persona. All those things, that he said, were the reason those Tomdaya shippers always DISGUSTED me, being so invasive and stalkerish towards a person, who wishes to remain private, as he stated again and again. I tried and tried to get this message across through my posts, to maybe make some people rethink their online behavior. I wanted people to go “Yeah, true, I shouldn’t worry where Tom is at right now or who he is seen with. I also shouldn’t care what kind of pictures he likes on his social media.” I just wanted people to respect Tom’s wish for privacy. To maybe put themselves in his shoes for a moment. I was especially hostile and mean towards Tomdaya Shippers, because these people show the most toxic behavior I have ever seen in people. The lack of respect is appalling and I have no shame in saying that and pointing it out to other people.

Enter 🤡🤡🤡.

Imagine my shock, when those paparazzi pics were published. I was speechless, heartbroken. My first thought was: Is this the person, who was so keen on privacy? Who has said that, after similar pics were published of him back in 2019, that he never wanted something like this to happen again? That it made him uncomfortable? Shocked him even? Was this really the same person, whose privacy I wanted to defend? My second thought: Who is this person? To all the haters, who expect me to shit all over Tom and Zendaya as a couple or want me to be pissed, that I was seemingly wrong about the shippers, called them delusional and they put me in my place:

I couldn’t care less, if Tom dated Zendaya, or anyone for that matter, it’s the way he handled the entire “situation” (Let’s call it that.), that makes me sick to my stomach, because of the disappointment, that I felt and still feel. I know, I keep saying, that everyone in Hollywood does PR, it’s literally an actor’s job, but for Tom to complain about invasive behavior repeatedly and then going out, doing this type of PR (*) is just hypocrisy at its finest. I’m trying my hardest not to hold it against him, because he’s just doing what needs to be done in order to stay relevant in Hollywood, but it shocked me and made me realize, that there truly is no person in the industry, that is genuine and that the picture, that I painted of him in my head doesn’t even come close to who he is.

Maybe I am being too harsh, maybe I overreact. I can see how some people will shake their head or roll their eyes at me but the disappointment that I feel is very much real to me. He’s not hurting anyone, I know, and there are more important things to complain about, than your favorite actor turning out to not be the person, you wished them to be, but his entire behavior right now is very off-putting and I don’t see, how I could support/stan an actor, who is just like every other guy in Hollywood, calculated and all for fame.

I was drawn to Tom for being quite unique in the way he handled fame up until this point. But this? Faking a relationship/using a relationship for PR, being papped everyday? I am not here for it.

* I contemplate doing a post on how I think (!!!!) Tom and Zendaya are faking a relationship/using their relationship for PR. Let me know if you would be interested.

[kindahoping4forever]

Take Me Home For Christmas // Ashton Irwin

Thank you to everyone for the incredible feedback about yesterday’s fic! I can’t believe we’re nearing the end of Hoe For The Hoe-lidays - Cass and I hope you’ve enjoyed our holiday stories and that you’ll continue to enjoy them even once the holiday season is over. 

Be on the lookout for today’s Cal blurb to be posted to @cal-puddies​​ and absolutely, 1000% like set a reminder on your phone if you have to, do not forget to come back here to my blog tomorrow for the closing ceremony of The Hoe-lidays: the latest galaxybrain co-write from me and Cass. No spoilers but it might be my fav collab of ours to date.

Warnings: Banter, bonding and boning with stranger in a bar!Ash (the fic is much sweeter than that but I couldn’t resist the alliteration), casual protected sex, female masturbation, use of a vibrator  

Word Count: 3000

Hoe For The Hoe-lidays Masterlist

Masterlist // Taglist and Ko-Fi linked above

Let  me  know  what  you  think!

“Two years! Love of my life, best thing that ever happened!” Ashton raises his glass in an exaggerated toast and the inquiring stranger smiles kindly, taking their own drink and walking away.

You don’t know how you managed to wait until the coast was clear before you burst out laughing. He glances behind him to make sure the curious patron is gone before he turns to you, grinning. “Should I have said three or four years, was that too much for two? My relationships typically don’t last even that long,” he admits, shaking his head.

“Listen, if I were well-adjusted enough to know what it’s like for someone to call me ‘the best thing that ever happened’ to them, I probably wouldn’t be spending Christmas Eve alone in a bar,” you point out with a laugh.

“But you’re not alone,” he leans in, nudging you a bit. “You’re out with your boyfriend of two years, celebrating his return home from an extensive and wildly successful world tour with his band.”

You cackle, “OK, that part was definitely a flourish too far, I don’t think anybody bought that.”

He smiles slyly. “You’re probably right,” he lilts, taking a sip, giving you a look over his glass that makes you grateful your holiday had turned out the way it did.

You’d made the tough call not to fly home for Christmas this year; you couldn't afford it and you didn't feel right taking your parents up on their offer to pay. Unfortunately, literally everyone you knew did get out of town for the holidays, leaving you with nowhere to go and no one to see.

On Christmas Eve, you ended up at the corner bar, which was nowhere near as lively as you'd hoped: save for what appears to be an older ladies' night out and a few stragglers, it was deserted. After exhausting your conversation options with the bartender, you ended up chatting with the man a couple stools over from you. He was handsome, charming and seemed to have an opinion or anecdote about any topic you raised. Looking for companionship, or at least some entertainment, you asked him to join you.

His name was Ash and he was in a similar predicament as you this Christmas. You didn't get a chance to get more in depth personally; maybe it's the ease you have with each other, maybe it's the way your outfits happen to complement each other but one by one, the women from the back of the bar approach you to kindly tell you what a nice couple you make and make small talk about your relationship. Rather than embarrass them - and again, for some entertainment - you both silently agree to humor them and answer as if you are together and before long, you've established an elaborate narrative for your romance.

“So where’d you take me for our anniversary this year, babe?” You grin, enjoying this game.

“Surprised you with Disney World,” he says confidently, gesturing towards the Stitch keychain decorating your car keys sitting on the bar. “Hid the plane tickets in your work bag, you found them at the office and called me to scream about it but I was already in the lobby to surprise you for lunch.”

You giggle, “Wow, not to brag about your boyfriend-ing skills or anything.”

Ashton shrugs and clinks your glass. “Nothing but the best for my girl.” You feel yourself flush and know it had to have been from his words, you both switched from booze to water quite some time ago.

“What about my birthday?” He asks, eyes playfully challenging you. “It’s in July, if that makes a difference.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see one of the ladies you talked to earlier and you lean in, resting your hand on his, continuing to sell your story. “Intimate backyard barbeque with friends, bonfire at night. I saved up and bought that acoustic guitar you’d been eyeing online but I waited to give it to you until everyone left because I wanted it to be a special moment between us,” you say quietly, pleased with your answer.

He smiles brightly and you feel yourself actively suppressing the urge to kiss over the dimples that form on his face. “A guitar, huh? I’m actually a drummer,” he teases.

“When you tipped the bartender, there was a guitar pick mixed in with your cash,” you point out smugly.

“Oh,” he giggles, clearly a little flustered. “Didn’t realize you were payin’ such close attention to me,” he flirts.

“Gotta make sure my man gets what he wants,” you cheekily reply.

He moves in closer and you’re pretty sure he’s about to kiss you when another inquisitive customer interrupts to tipsily assert that Ash is a fool if he doesn’t “put a ring on it” this holiday season. You both take the comment in stride and laugh together when the encounter is over. The heat from your near-kiss is still there but the moment has decidedly passed.

After a few more entries into your pretend love story and a few more close encounters, the bar starts clearing out. You can’t believe you spent the whole evening talking with Ashton but you also don’t want it to end; you haven’t felt chemistry like this with someone in a long time. You walk to the door with him and you’re not surprised when you hear yourself say, “My place or yours, babe?”

He turns to you with a wide smile, amusement and what you’re hoping is lust in his eyes. “I was hoping you might say that,” he admits.

“Can’t let my travel-weary boyfriend wake up alone on Christmas morning,” you chirp, stepping out into the cool night air.

“That part of the story was actually true,” he chuckles. “I did just get home from touring with my band.”

You raise your eyebrows, interested. “Well, the part about me living just down the street was also true, so let’s start walking,” you wink, starting to lead the way. 

He laughs loudly and reaches out for your arm, smoothly pulling you into his arms for a charged kiss, the tension that’s been building all evening finally boiling over. His lips are softer than you imagined but his technique is as fevered and demanding as you’d hoped; your tongue makes its way into his mouth and you murmur when his strokes it in turn.

It’s hard to say if it’s the chilly weather or your desire but you make it back to your apartment in record time. It’s not often you bring home guys you just met but as you lead him to your bedroom, you realize how he doesn’t feel like that at all, almost as if your fictitious history together has bled into reality.

Ash shuts your bedroom door behind him and you waste no time pressing yourself into him, making out and undressing each other until you’re both down to your underwear. He lifts you up by your thighs, wrapping them around his waist; he tries to get fancy and kiss you while he carries you over to the bed, hitting his leg on the edge of the frame and almost sending you both flying.

The two of you break into laughter as he safely drops you on the bed. “Did some rearranging since last time I was over, huh, baby?” He jokes, sitting up against the headboard to rub the knot on his shin.

“Vibes were off without you here, had to get some feng shui happening,” you reply, trying to catch your breath after your giggle fit. You let your eyes roam over his near naked body. He’s fit, almost ridiculously muscular and judging by his biceps, you decide he must’ve been telling the truth about being a drummer. You didn’t expect all the tattoos you’re seeing but you definitely approve and the amused look on his face tells you he’s noticed.

“Like the new ink, babe? Wanted to surprise you,” he grins, drawing your attention to a large, dark coin decorating the left side of his ribcage. 

You crawl over to him and let your fingertips dance over the tattoo. “Very nice,” you murmur before mouthing over it. He groans when your tongue pokes out at it and you shudder at the sound, continuing to move around his chest, hoping to hear it again.

He lets you play and then flips you over so he can show you some appreciation as well. He nips and nibbles around your neck and chest, doubling back when you breathe a particularly enthusiastic sigh of approval. 

“Love this underwear, by the way,” he comments as he removes your bra. “Just like you wore on our first date. Took you home from a bar that night too”

You giggle at his addition to your story. “Oh did you? I thought earlier we said our first date was at an Italian restaurant.” You gasp as his mouth encases your nipple.

“Well… dinner then drinks, obviously,” he retorts, snickering against you. He pulls back to discard your panties and you swear you can almost feel his eyes devouring you. “Holy shit, you’re gorgeous.”

You beam and beckon him closer; before you can kiss him like you planned, his mouth is back on your neck, trying to relocate that spot under your jaw that caused you to moan so boldly, he felt his cock twitch. His hand is busy between your legs, tracing lightly around your lips before dipping into your folds to see what makes you tick.

You feel him hard against your thigh as he plays with you so you reach down to return the favor; you do your best to maintain a poker face when you feel the size of him through his boxers but Ashton’s fingers inside you undoubtedly feel the surge of wetness your realization brings. 

You eagerly slip your hand inside his underwear and you both groan when you wrap your hand around him. His cock couldn’t be more ready for you, head dripping with precum; you spread it liberally as you touch him, thoughts racing as your hand seems to keep going and going down his length before you reach the base. You give him a squeeze, biting your lip at the feel of his weight and girth in your hand.

He quietly curses as your strokes become more confident; together you get rid of his boxers and as his cock springs free, he teases you with a smile. “Think you can take it, baby?”

“It has been a while,” you admit, slyly adding, “I mean… with you on tour and everything.” He chuckles and gives you a swat as you sit up to dig through your nightstand.

You shoot him a glance over your shoulder and he breaks character for a second, rushing out, “I… did that without even thinking, I’m sorry. Was that OK?”

You toss the condoms and lube on the bed and give his cock a few more tugs as you shrug, “Do it harder next time.”

Ash smirks as he gets situated, rolling on a condom and lubing up his length before tossing you the bottle; when you’re ready, you get up on all fours, flashing him a dazzling smile over your shoulder. “Just like our first date, right?”

He grins, kneeling behind you, large hands covering your ass, squeezing and giving it a couple firm spanks as requested. You gasp as his cock taps against your clit before pushing into you, paying close attention to your breathing to see if you need him to slow down. You hear his breath heavy as well and you know you must feel tight around him, no one has ever filled you like this before; it’s overwhelming but you’re aching with anticipation so you rock back against him, letting out a breathy “Please” for good measure.

The soft way he runs his hands over your back is a fascinating contrast to the rough snap of his hips against your ass as he drives his cock into you. You fuck with a familiarity you didn’t expect, listening to each other’s sounds to tell you what the other needs.

You stretch on the bed more, popping your ass out further, inviting him to really let you have it; the sound of a loud smack on your ass fills the room and his thrusts increase in both speed and impact. You want to think of something clever to say, to let him know how good he’s making you feel and to continue the intimacy of your fictional romance but all you can think about is how full his cock makes you feel.

You hear his breath speed up but feel his hips slowing and you deduce he’s trying to stave off his orgasm; you’re nowhere near close so you decide to improve the situation for you both. “Babe, can we try something else?” You look over your shoulder winningly. “Feels good but I need more.”

Ashton pulls out, taking a few deep breaths while you turn onto your back; he sits upright on his knees in front of you and after some brief negotiations with your flexibility, you swing your legs up on his shoulder before he slips himself back in.

This new position is quickly much more intense than either of you anticipated. He’s hitting deeper than before and you’re in heaven with his hands roving over your stomach and chest; having your legs close together like this makes you seem even tighter and you hear him breathing even faster than before.

He fucks you hard and the combination of hearing your desperate sounds, seeing your tits bounce and feeling your pussy grip his cock so tightly is too much. “Fuck… ‘s too fuckin’ good, baby… fuck,” he groans and within seconds he’s filling the condom with cum.

You moan watching as he loses himself in the feeling, slowing his hips gradually until he’s spent. He carefully slides your legs off his shoulder, offering you a peck and a quiet apology as he gets up to throw away the condom.

Maybe it’s out of habit, maybe you are just that comfortable with this stranger for some reason,  but without hesitation you reach back into your nightstand and retrieve your favorite vibrator. 

You feel Ash get back into bed and you turn to see him propped up on his side, watching you intently as you slick the vibe through your wetness. “No offense...” you start.

“None taken,” he smiles, studying your toy. “I was gonna offer you my mouth, but…”

“This’ll be a lot quicker,” you insist, teasing the tip of the toy at your entrance. “You relax, enjoy the afterglow. I’ll join you in literally like three minutes.” You push it in and click the button to start it vibrating inside you.

He scoots closer, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. “Two years in and the romance is already dead,” he jokingly laments.

You cackle loudly, clenching around your vibe and your laughs turn into a moan. “Goddammit, Ash, you wanna crack jokes or help your ol’ girl out?”

He smiles and pulls you into a sleepy kiss while his other hand grips and massages your breast. His tongue lazily dances with yours and his hands travel over your skin, caressing, teasing, igniting all while you work the vibe between your thighs.

You pull away from his mouth to pant, “Check this shit out.” You click a second button on the toy and the clitoral vibrator whirs to life. Ashton can almost immediately detect the difference in your breathing.

He rolls your nipple between his fingers, watching as your back arches and your hips swirl. “Just like that, baby, come on. Let me see you cum,” he murmurs.

You’re surprised to hear yourself call out his name when you begin clenching around your toy and you especially don’t expect to tug on his hair, silently pleading for him to kiss you while the waves of pleasure overtake your body.

You whimper and pant against his lips until you have to pull away to frantically turn the vibrator off, nearing overstimulation. You close your eyes and catch your breath, waiting for the aftershocks to stop, your legs to stop shaking. 

You finally open your eyes to see him offering you a handful of tissues he thoughtfully snagged off the bedside table; you graciously accept, wrapping them around your toy so you can set it on the nightstand. You look over at him again, gazing at each other for a beat before bursting into euphoric giggles. 

You return to the bedroom after cleaning up to find Ash laying in his boxers, messing with his phone. You don’t know if you should say it out loud but you really hope he’s not ordering a car to take him home.

“Well, I can only speak for myself but I’d call that a decidedly Merry Christmas,” you sigh exhaustedly, flopping onto the bed.

He sets his phone aside and looks you over as you stretch out beside him. “This is cute,” he smiles, pinching at the Christmas cookie themed nightshirt you threw on in the bathroom. “Would you say that was more or less fun than our first Christmas together?”

You grin at him as you try to remember what tale you’d spun back at the bar. “Oh god… car broke down on the way to my parents’ house… seasonally appropriate ‘no room at the inn’ joke… fashioned a Christmas dinner out of motel vending machine snacks?”

“That’s the one,” he cackles. A mischievous look crosses his features and he leans in to you. “You know, we haven’t reminisced about what else went on in that motel room...” He trails off, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows.

You bite your lip, pulling him closer by the chain around his neck. “Hmm... I’m actually having trouble remembering that part,” you flirt, nibbling at his bottom lip. “Maybe you could remind me, babe? And please, take your time.”

————-

Taglist issues again so my apologies if you get notif’d more than once (or not at all)

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@photochic18  @kouska901 @Indermeow  @dantord

[queenlua]

hey, i started following you recently and ur bio says ur a hacker? any tips on where to start? hacking seems like a v cool/fun way to learn more abt coding and cybersecurity/infrastructure and i'd like to explore it but there's so much on the internet and like, i'm not trying to get into anything illegal. thanks!

huh, an interesting question, ty!

i can give more tailored advice if you hit me up on chat with more specifics on your background/interests.

given what you've written here, though, i'll just assume you don't have any immediate professional aspirations (e.g. you just want to learn some things, and you aren't necessarily trying to get A Cyber Security Job TM within the next three months or w/e), and that you don't know much about any specific programming/computering domain yet.

(stuff under cut because long)

first i'd probably just try to pick some interesting problem that you think you can solve with tech. this doesn't need to be a "hacking" project at first; i was just messing around with computers for ages before i did anything involving security/exploitation.

if you don't already know how to program, you should ideally pick a problem you can solve via programming. for instance: i learned a lot back in the 2000s, when play-by-post forum RPGs were in vogue.  see, i'd already been messing around, building my own personal sites, first just with HTML & CSS, and later on with Javascript and PHP.   and i knew the forum software everyone used (InvisionPowerBoard) was written in PHP.  so when one of the admins at my RPG complained that they'd like the ability to set multiple profile pictures, i was like, "hey i'm good at programming, want me to create a mod to do that," and then i just... did. so then they asked me to program more features, and i got all the sexy nerd cred for being Forum Mod Queen, and it was a good time, i learned a lot.

(i also got to be the person who was frantically IMed at 2am because wtf the forum is down and there's an inscrutable error, what do??? basically sysadmining! also, much less sexy! still, i learned a lot!)

the key thing is that it's gotta be a problem that's interesting to you: as much as i love making dorky sites in PHP, half the fun was seeing other people using my stuff, and i think the era of forum-based RPGs has passed. but maybe you can apply some programming talents to something that you are interested in—maybe you want to make a silly Chrome extension to make people laugh, a la Cloud to Butt, or maybe you'd like to make a program that converts pixel art into cross-stitching patterns, maybe you want to just make a cool adventure game on those annoying graphing calculators they make you use in class, or make a script for some online game you play, or make something silly with Arduino (i once made a trash can that rolled toward me when i clapped my hands; it was fun, and way easier than you'd think!), whatever.

i know a lot of hacker-types who got their start doing ROM hacking for video games—replacing the character art or animations or whatever in old NES games. that's probably more relevant than the PHP websites, at least, and is probably a solid place to get started; in my experience those communities tend to be reasonably friendly to questions. pick a small thing you want to do & ask how to do it.

also, a somewhat unconventional path, but—once i knew how to program a bit of Python, i started doing goofy junk, like, "hey can i implemented NamedTuple from scratch,” which tends to lead to Python metaprogramming, which leads to surprising shit like "oh, stack frames are literally just Python objects and you can manually edit them in the interpreter to do deliberately horrendous/silly things, my god this language allows too much reflection and i'm having too much fun"... since Python is a lot of folks' first language these days, i thought i'd point that out, since i think this is a pretty accessible start to thinking about How Programs Actually Work under the hood. allison kaptur has some specific recommendations on how to poke around, if you wanna go that route.

it's reasonably likely you'll end up doing something "hackery" in the natural course of just working on stuff. for instance, while i was working on the IPB forum software mods, i became distressed to learn that everyone was using an INSECURE version of the software! no one was patching their shit!! i yelled at the admins about it, and they were like "well we haven't been hacked yet so it's not a problem," so i uh, decided to demonstrate a proof of concept? i downloaded some sketchy perl script, kicked it until it worked, logged in as the admins, and shitposted a bit before i logged out, y'know, to prove my point.

(they responded by banning me for two weeks, and did not patch their software. which, y'know, rip to them; they got hacked by an unrelated Turkish group two months later, and those dudes just straight-up deleted the whole website. i was a merciful god by comparison!)

anyway, even though downloading a perl script and just pointing it at a website isn't really "hacking" (it's the literal definition of script kiddie, heh)—the point is i was just experimenting a lot and trying a lot of stuff, which meant i was getting comfortable with thinking of software as not just some immutable relic, but something you can touch and prod in unexpected ways.

this dovetails into the next thing, which is like, just learn a lot of stuff. a boring conventional computer science degree will teach you a lot (provided you take it seriously and actually try to learn shit); alternatively, just taking the same classes as a boring conventional computer science degree, via edX or whatever free online thingy, will also teach you a lot. ("contributing to open source" also teaches you a lot but... hngh... is a whole can of worms; send a follow-up ask if you want that rant.)

here's where i should note that "hacking" is an impossibly broad category: the kind of person who knows how to fuck with website authentication tokens is very different than someone who writes a fuzzer, who is often quite different than someone who looks at the bug a fuzzer produces and actually writes a program that can exploit that bug... so what you focus on depends on what you're interested in. i imagine classes with names like "compilers," "operating systems," and "networking" will teach you a lot. but, like, idk, all knowledge is god-breathed and good for teaching. hell, i hear some universities these days have actual computer security classes? that's probably a good thing to look at, just to get a sense of what's out there, if you already know how to program.

also be comfortable with not knowing everything, but also, learn as you go. the bulk of my security knowledge came when i got kinda airdropped into a work team that basically hired me entirely on "potential" (lmao), and uh, prior to joining i only had the faintest idea what a hypervisor was? or the whole protection ring concept? or ioctls or sandboxing or threat models or, fuck, anything? i mostly just pestered people with like 800 questions and slowly built up a knowledge base, and remember being surprised & delighted when i went to a security conference a year later and could follow most of the talks, and when i wound up at a bar with a guy on the xbox security team and we compared our security models a bunch, and so on.  there wasn't a magic moment when i "got it", i was just like, "okay huh this dude says he found a ring-0 exploit... what does that mean... okay i think i got that... why is that a big deal though... better ask somebody.." (also: reading an occasional dead tree book is a good idea. i owe my firstborn to Robert Love's Linux Kernel Development, as outdated as it is, and also O'Reilly's kookaburra book gave me a great overview of web programming back in the day, etc.  you can learn a lot by just clicking around random blogs, but you’ll often end up with a lot of random little facts and no good mental scaffolding for holding it together; often, a decent book will give you that scaffolding.)

(also, it's pretty useful if you can find a knowledgable someone to pepper with random questions as you go. finding someone who will actively mentor you is tricky, but most working computery folks are happy to tell you things like "what you're doing is actually impossible, here's why," or "here's a tutorial someone told me was good for learning how to write a linux kernel module," or "here's my vague understanding of this concept you know nothing about," or "here's how you automate something to click on a link on a webpage," which tends to be handier than just google on its own.)

if you're reading this and you're like "ok cool but where's the part where i'm handed a computer and i gotta break in while going all hacker typer”—that's not the bulk of the work, alas! like, for sure, we do have fun pranking each other by trying dumb ways of stealing each other's passwords or whatever (once i stuck a keylogger in a dude's keyboard, fun times). but a lot of my security jobs have involved stuff like, "stare at this disassembly a long fuckin' time to figure out how the program pointer got all fucked up," or, "write a fuzzer that feeds a lot of randomized input to some C++ program, watch the program crash because C++ is a horrible language for writing software, go fix all the bugs," or "think Really Hard TM about all the settings and doohickeys this OS/GPU/whatever has, think about all the awful things someone could do with it, threat model and sandbox accordingly." occasionally i have done cool proof-of-concept hacks but honestly writing exploits can kinda be tedious, lol, so like, i'm only doing that if it's the only way i can get people to believe that Yes This Is Actually A Problem, Fix Your Code

"lua that's cool and all but i wanted, like, actual links and recommendations and stuff" okay, fair. here's some ideas:

microcorruption: very fun embedded security CTF; teaches you everything you need to know as you're doing it.

cryptopals crypto challenges: very fun little programming exercises that teach you a lot of fundamental cryptography concepts as you're going along! you can do these even as a bit of a n00b; i did them in Python for the lulz

the binary bomb lab is hilariously copied by, like, so many CS programs, lol, but for good reason. it's accessible and fun and is the first time most people get to feel like a real hacker! (requires you know a bit of C beforehand)

ctftime is a good way to see when new CTFs ("capture the flag"s; security-focused competitions) are coming up. or, sometimes CTFs post their source code, so you can continue trying them after the CTF is over. i liked Stripe's CTFs when they were going, because they focused on "web stuff", and "web stuff" was all i really knew at the time. if you're more interested in staring at disassembly, there's CTFs focused on that sort of thing too.

azeria has good ARM assembly & exploitation tutorials

also, like, lots of good talks out there; just watching defcon/cansecwest/etc talks until something piques your interest is very fun. i'd die on a battlefield for any of Christopher Domas's talks, but he assumes a lot of specific x86/OS knowledge, lol, so maybe don’t start with that. oh, Julia Evans's blog is honestly probably pretty good for just learning a lot of stuff and really beginner-friendly?

oh and wrt legality... idk, i haven't addressed it here since it hasn't come up in my own work much, tbh. if you're just getting started you're kind of unlikely to Break The Law without, y'know, realizing maybe you're doing something a bit gray-area? and you can cross that bridge when you come to it? Real Hacking TM is way more of a pain-in-the-ass than doing CTFs and such, and you'll learn way more with the latter, so who cares lol just do the fun thing