#but also our teeth? haha

[vox-ex]

seasons + stars

supercorptober 2023

“Sometimes when I look at you, I feel I'm gazing at a distant star." ― Haruki Murakami

or Kara deals with the impermanence of herself and the permanence of her love

----

Kara comes to Earth in the Spring.

On the backs of stars she will never see again she carries their dust with her, lays it down in soil tasked with bearing witness to ghosts that are not its own.

The stars that are a part of her become a part of it.

She spends days in the forest, the bright blue sky above her, Sol at her back, Rao in her chest, through the vibrant green trees, across flowers that bloom in hues of yellows and oranges.

She lays out at night on the roof, tries to trace the inky black as far into the distance as she can. Far enough she might still see a light that hasn't been replaced by darkness yet.

The stars will soon become a part of her — she will eventually become a part of them too.

Summer comes with long days and short nights and she misses the stars.

Autumn rushes in with skies that almost feel familiar.

Winter nights are long and cold. She stays out late with the stars again. Speaks to the scattered bits of light — the scattered bits of herself.

Year after year, she is dismantled and reassembled by the seasons that come and go. Until all the bits of stardust she had carried with her from Krypton are all gone. Until she is made of new stars and new dust and new atoms. And what is gone? What is gone is put back into the space to begin again somewhere else.

But then what of her?

Is Kara Zor El somewhere in space?

Is she buried in the soil on Earth?

Is she shoved inside the chest of this other her?

Will she always be two versions different of herself at once?

Kara leaves Earth in the Spring.

Sol at her back, and nothing but darkness ahead.

She doesn't choose to leave, but she is gone all the same.

She meets ghosts she thought were all gone. Buried somewhere between Krypton and Earth — lost with the parts of herself that she too had been buried.

Her own ghost is there.

Haunts her with the parts of herself she wants to hold onto but can't.

Taunts her with the parts of herself she begs to replace but can't.

Kara comes back to Earth in the Summer.

"August of another summer, and once again I am drinking the sun"

She isn't sure what she is made of now.

Isn't sure how long it will take to shed it from her skin.

Isn't sure who she will be when it's gone.

She is just tired, she thinks, of this struggle of atoms, of time, of feeling broken apart.

But she looks up at the sky that night. Find stars again instead of darkness.

Thinks of how they are each a part of Earth, or Krypton, of her.

She is tired, she thinks, but she is also thankful.

It's Autumn when the world almost ends.

The world almost ends, and she realizes she wants more time — needs more time.

It's Autumn when it starts again.

Not in the way one thinks of worlds beginning — in the way of galaxies and of universes — big bangs expanding all at once.

But in the way we do. Slowly. Little by Little.

It begins again with green eyes and dark hair.

It settles into gentle touches and quiet words.

Kara stands at the edge of a field, her feet sinking slightly into the damp forest floor. Leaves scatter across the ground with with freshly fallen pine needles. It smells like cold, like the winter that is coming.

Lena's hand slips into hers, fingers threading together with practiced ease.

Slow.

Gentle.

She feels a droplet of water cling to her skin, just cold enough that she can feel it, can tell it a part from the warmth of Lena's hand in hers.

"I can't believe it's so dark already?"

Kara follows her gaze up to the first stars just peeking through the gaps in the trees.

Meeting Lena first came at the end of a Summer.

Meeting Lena came, and the world softened just a little — just enough.

Slowly.

Little by little.

In all the months between, all the years, all the seasons. They have both been taken apart and put back together, over and over and over.

Sometimes by the universe.

Sometimes by each other.

But amidst the endless dance of stars and the perpetual renewal of atoms, the part of them that loved the other, had always been left whole, over and over and over.

And there are still days where she is not sure who she is — who she is supposed to be with this patchwork collection of particles stuffed into herself.

But then Lena will take her hand and thread their fingers together just like this, and it will feel like each one of them has found it's place and a purpose all over again.

-----

read and follow along on Ao3 too

[dawnleaf37]

sometimes you just need to eat a shellfish

[lovecrazedpup]

i dont want to sleep

[b1rds3ye]

hi!! this is my first time doing a request so idk if I'm doing this right haha but uh, I was wondering if you could do like. yknow the masked one you made for the 141 (I can't remember the name rn💔)? I thought of like, a sequel idea. like, what if during combat an enemy manages to take reader's mask, and so reader panics and like, rips the enemies throat out with their teeth (or if that's too violent, just goes basically rabid on them lmao) and how they would react?? if this is too violent or specific dw you don't have to!! anyways, I love your content it's totally awesome ur writing is amazing! have a good day!!

YES I LOVE THE BADASSERY AND THE UNHINGEDNESS!! If I'm your first request I'm so flattered anon pls do feel free to drop by again <333 Also just going to do general rabidness because ngl the throat thing sounds like an infection speedrun and we want our masked reader to stay nice and healthy <333

Word Count: 1.2 (it got a little long WHOOPS)

Warning: Canon typical violence, reader does get a lil sadistic and unhinged <333

Beyond Task Force 141 and Laswell, many - if not all - allied soldiers wondered about what lay under your mask. Obscuring even the eyes, your visage was more unreadable than Ghost's. Larger than life, a soldier among men.

There was a running joke that there was just nothing under your mask, perhaps an eldritch horror of sorts. You let the new recruits entertain the thought, it kept morale up as they conjured more myths of you. They said that no one has seen you without your mask. They were partially right.

It simply was that no one lived to tell the tale.

You were never one for close combat, but fighting terrorists was never smooth sailing. The chaos of battle had all of the 141 separated against the tight streets of Las Almas. How uncanny that you could not see your allies but hear their gunfire. Running out of ammo, you couldn't lament at your misfortune as a shoulder pummeling into your chest, sending you to the ground and the air out of your lungs. Head bashing against the floor you groaned as you furiously clawed up to whatever heavy weight was crushing your body. You were starting to make up the figure of a man hovering over you through the blurry haze of a concussion that filled your sight. The distant static of Price's voice through the radio, probably asking where the hell were you but you had more pressing issues at hand.

Through your struggle and flailing limbs you managed to wring the enemy's pistol off of them with a painful twist of their wrist. And they retaliated tenfold, a large sweaty hand reaching down and pressing your head back against the ground. Your adrenaline makes you writhe further, he was going to suffocate you, or worse, poison you with how fucking awful his hand smelt as the stink of burning gunpowder replaced any of your oxygen. But no, he committed a far worse crime.

A singular pull and the grating tear of fabric as your mask is pulled off of your face.

A heavy moment where your enemy looks down at you and his gaze is not like before. It's clear, it's deep. It is not looking at your facade but at you and you are no longer a soldier. You are merely a human, so fragile, so weak. One that is on the verge of death in a foreign land surrounded by bodies of fallen comrades and enemies alike. One whose mythos is all but lost at the victorious and leering smirk of an enemy as they take in your face.

That simply won't do.

Pulling your knee up to create space between you and the man, you pull out your tactical knife from your waist and drive it into his torso. His smile falls only to land at settle on yours below him, just like his blood that trickles as forbidden crimson down your hands and seeps into your uniform. It's disgustingly warm. He grows heavier as he loses all control over his body and you heave to throw his figure off to the side. You stab him once again for good measure. And then again. And again. Quick, short jabs down with a sharpened blade that cuts through uniform, flesh and bone alike. You did not count how many times you drove your blade down, numbers were too complex when your mind was running faster than any comprehensible speed. There was only one goal. To make sure no one knows what happened.

A harsh grip on the shoulder yanks you back up and you swipe with your armed limb to cut your new assailant's neck but they were onto you. Catching your arm, they pull it up as they hold onto your shoulder once again with a tightening grip that digs into your uniform. But they do nothing more, no matter how much you thrash and kick.

"Wake up, Sergeant," your opponent seethes and that voice makes you still, a buoy that floats across through your rage. Deep and grounding and your captain's.

You nearly stumble back but Price catches you before you crumple to the ground in exhaustion. The adrenaline was escaping your body leaving you with barely the energy to stay upright. Your head lolls back for a second before you bring it to the side to look at your direct superior, the remnants of a concussion making your vision blurry.

"You broken?" he asks.

"Negative, sir,” you respond immediately but he looks a little doubtful, a singular eyebrow raised as he inspects you. Not your body, but your face. The dilated pupils and the taut muscles told more than any wound.

"Can't say the same about your wee friend over there," Soap whistles as he tilts his head to behind you. “Christ, you did a number on him.”

You dare turn to look over your shoulder but Ghost already situated himself in front of the body. But between his feet you could already make out the indistinguishable mass of tattered fabric and discoloured flesh. Fresh blood filled the rivets between the cobblestones, the remnants of the body inching its way closer to you-

"Was it the mask?" Simon brings your attention back to him. You nod dumbly. He only dips his head in what you can only describe as understanding as he folds his arms, fortifying his stance in front of the mess you made. You weren’t going to see your handiwork, he was too kind to ever let you.

John drops his hands down to his sides as Gaz approaches you with your mask.

"Remind me to never get on your bad side," Kyle offers you a sympathetic smile.

"Learnt that the first day I saw 'em on duty," Johnny retorts and you instinctively smile as you take your mask from Kyle. The hardened plaster of your mask had cracked, the fabric that hugged your neck had become torn but it'll do for the remainder of the mission. Slipping the mask back on, Simon offers a nod of approval while Johnny tugged at the fabric for a few finishing touches.

Ultimately the mission was successful. The task force returns to base and although none of the boys mentioned the carnage you left, there are still whispers of it on base. You had hurried to debrief and get your mask fixed but it seemed some privates caught sight of you and that was enough to spark rumours. Your mask had gotten so fractured that a shard was left back in the streets of Las Almas and revealed one of your eyes to the rest of the world. Such a small organ but so vivid. The privates saw, and more was added to the myth that was you. There was now no question about what was under the mask. No lovecraftian horror or empty space, no monster beyond comprehension. No, what was under your mask was terrifyingly human.

Masked Reader Masterlist Call of Duty Masterlist

[livelaughlovesubs]

Chuuya with a remote controlled vibrator in him while going on a date, ueudgdgd im going insane imagining how needy he'd act when you'd put the vibrator a notch higher everytime he tried to talk

And OHHMYGOSH imagine you start dirty talking Infront of him while he starts panicking looking around trying to see if anyone heard you before replying back

I don't know if you've noticed but im a big sucker for sub chuuya heheh!!

-🍰 anon

No I didn’t notice, i never even knew you like chuuya until now. Nooo…. @nvllxiety

Dom!reader x Sub!chuuya

Warning: use of sex toys, exhibition, dirty talk

This was supposed to be innocent, so how did it end up like this? Chuuya asked himself, cursing a little under his breath. His plan was to take you out to a nice restaurant, have a romantic dinner and good wine, not whatever he was doing right now.

You asked him before the date if he was willing to play a little, pinning him against the wall with his back facing you. He was just looking into the mirror, adjusting his attire when you grabbed him by the waist and did all that. Next thing he knew you slipped a hand inside his pants, and inserted a little vibrator in him. That happened so quick he couldn’t even refuse, only gasping a little at the feeling. “You perverted… asshole.” The male insulted you, cheeks a little rosy from your actions. “Haha, I can’t deny that.” You smirked joyfully, letting him go soon after. “Can you keep this inside you during our date? It’s such a small thing, nothing will happen.” No matter how you looked at this, it was shady, he had all reasons to disagree. And yet, he couldn’t help but accept the challenge.

That turned out to be a mistake, sadly he only found out during dinner. While he was looking at the menu, he suddenly felt something move and rub against his insides. “GaaHhh..” A low moan escaped him and he instantly jumped, looking at the tables around you two to see if anyone heard him. Since no one was looking in his direction, he sat down quietly, also embarrassed to the core. What about you? Oh you were enjoying yourself, too much even. Sitting in your seat with a bright grin, giving him a peek of the remote controller just to tease him. “Why you, give that to me!” He murmured, face already beet red. Instead of listening to him, you turned it up a notch. That earned you a nice reaction.

His hand was quickly thrown over his mouth, muffling the whines he would have let out. Chuuya glared at you, but you weren’t scared in the slightest. All you did was point towards the menu and whisper, “pick something out, chuuya, or do you want to take your sweet time with this date?” Your voice lingered in his head for a while, enough to make him feel dizzy. Maybe it was the fault of the vibrator buzzing inside him and not you, who knows. You were truly merciless, testing his resolve like this. When the waiter came to take your order you turned it up, whenever he tried to curse at you the vibrations would get stronger, and whenever he pleaded you’d answer with more teasing.

“You can do this chuuya, I believe in you. After it’s over I’ll give you a nice reward.” That’s what you said when you noticed him gripping his fork tightly, unable to eat his food. All of this was entertainment to you, and he couldn’t help but like it secretly. He’d never say it out loud, but the blissful expression on his face explains everything. “Come on, don’t get all worked up on your own now.” You chuckled, watching him shake and tremble. Poor boy couldn’t say anything in opposition, because he was sure if he opened his mouth now he wouldn’t be able to hold his voice back. Even if it was pleasurable, he was still a bit worried that others would notice. What would they think of him…? “You are squirming so much, how adorable.” On the other hand you didn’t care about all that, so you just kept complimenting him and commenting on his behaviour. The boy gritted his teeth and showed you the middle finger. Now you really couldn’t stop laughing.

Since he still haven’t touched his food yet, you decided to be nice to him and turned the little toy off. A sigh of relief left the male, before he scoffed at you, “I knew you were planning something, but doing it in public? For fucks sake.” He was blushing a lot, face all crimson as he bawled his fists. How funny, he was already letting his foul mouth run loose like this. “Don’t forget I still have the remote~” you reminded him, this shut him up in an instant. “You lost the game, chuuya. I’ll think of a punishment. So take your time and Bon appetite.” After he heard that, he couldn’t concentrate on his food anymore. Were you serious? What were you going to do to him later…? The anticipation and fear were tormenting his thought, curiosity peeked and heart pounding. Right now he didn’t care about the food anymore. And the next day he doesn’t even remember what he ordered the previous night, all the memories he had were of something much more delicious.

[leclercvsx]

I miss your facts | TEXTING AU

LANDO NORRIS

pairings: lando x reader

summary: y/n and lando are bestfriends, y/n liking lando. She introduces him to one of her bestfriends, he forgets about her and only realises what he missed when it’s too late

warnings: mentions of suicide!

y/n <3

did you know that some sharks can’t stop swimming otherwise they’ll die?

Lan <3

that’s useful, thanks

y/n <3

EXACTLY! i knew i was needed

Lan <3

you’re always needed

11:23am | thursday

y/n <3

i miss you, can you come over after training?

Lan <3

i will, might be a little while though

y/n <3

don’t take tooo long

14:56pm | Tuesday

y/n <3

did you know that there’s over 500 different species of sharks?

Lan <3

i didn’t know that, no. cool

y/n <3

OH ALSO

there’s a new girl at my work, she’s super nice

you should come meet her!

Lan <3

i might

10:35am | Saturday

Lan <3

you were right, Taylor is actually really nice

y/n <3

SEE? I TOLD YOU

me and her are gonna hang out on tuesday if you wanna come

Lan <3

sure

16:45pm | Wednesday

y/n <3

australia is wider than the moon

you should tell Oscar that

Lan <3

Taylor told me that

y/n <3

oh really? wow she really knows her facts!

Lan <3

yeah, she’s pretty smart

18:18pm | Saturday

y/n <3

do you wanna hang out?

i’m bored

Lan <3

i’m with Taylor rn

y/n <3

oh, nevermind then😊

12:25pm | Sunday

y/n <3

human teeth are the only body part that cannot heal themselves

Lan <3

i know, Taylor told me

y/n <3

it’s illegal to own just ONE guinea pig in switzerland

Lan <3

Taylor’s from Switzerland, she told me

17:34pm | Tuesday

y/n <3

the heart of the shrimp is located in the head!

Lan <3

the shrimps heart is located in the head

y/n <3

haha, we said the same thing!!

Lan <3

Taylor told me the fact, haha

y/n <3

ohh

9:27am | Thursday

y/n <3

do you have time? i really wanna talk about something

Lan <3

i’m with Taylor right now, but what’s up?

y/n <3

oh okay, nevermind then :)

17:26pm | Monday

Lan <3

octopuses are so weird, they’re cool looking though

y/n <3

i thought you hated octopuses?

Lan <3

i did before.

but Taylor told me some cool facts about them

y/n <3

i did that with sharks🙃

14:27pm | Friday

y/n <3

you’ve been hanging out with Taylor a lot

Lan <3

anything wrong?

y/n <3

nothings wrong, i just miss you

Lan <3

i’m not leaving you though.

y/n <3

no, i know

13:45pm | Wednesday

y/n <3

hiiii! do you wanna hang out?

hello?

read

16:56pm | Wednesday

Lan <3

sorry i was hanging out with Taylor

y/n <3

i know.

Lan <3

why are you mad?

y/n <3

i’m not?

Lan <3

why is it so wrong that i’m hanging out with her?

18:34pm | Sunday

y/n <3

you’re forgetting me.

lando

i’m not though?

hello?

answer me.

i’m not forgetting you.

14:30pm | Wednesday

y/n <3

you’re all i have, had.

lando

why are you using dots? don’t scare me

y/n <3

is Taylor all you needed?

lando

stop.

17:25pm | Tuesday

y/n <3

i’m sorry

lando

for what?

stop leaving me on read, please.

stop scaring me.

you’re not funny.

18:45pm | Thursday

lando

i miss you

i was dumb

i’m really sorry

Venus is the only planet to spin clockwise

i really wanted to tell you, i miss your facts. i love you. i hope one day we meet again

you could’ve told me about Taylor. i reread our messages, i saw that you needed me

i’m sorry

12:34pm | Sunday

lando

you looked really pretty at your funeral today

i miss you

pez candles were made for you, so you could stop smoking

i could smell it on you before, now i miss it.

3:34am | Tuesday

lando

sharks skin feels like sandpaper.

7:17am | Wednesday

lando

sharks are one of the oldest living species on the earth.

but you knew that, right?

——————————

this made me sob writing it😭

ib: this tiktok

masterlist | request page

[stylespresleyhearted]

POV: AUSTIN BUTLER IS IN LOVE

(AND DOESN’T CARE WHO KNOWS IT)

masterlist here x

liked by fan21, user13, and 937 others

enews Love is in the air! Austin Butler and his girlfriend shared the sweetest reunion outside the airport 😭 more photos at the link in bio

view all comments

fan34 omg i am so freaking jealous

user12 GOD HAS FAVORITES AND IT AINT ME

butlerfan It feels so good to see him be publicly in love and not hide it anymore

liked by florencepugh, tomhardy, and 15933 others

austinbutler Happy day 🎂❤️

view all comments

fan13 LMAO THE OFFICE MEME RETURNS

tchalamet happy birthday gee! @yourinstagram

zendaya 27 has never looked better queen 💕

ashleytisdale I’m telling Jupiter LOL! Happiest birthday to you @yourinstagram you are a blessing in our lives 🥰🥰

ashleybee HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY 💘💘💘

liked by keoghan92, zendaya, and 97188 others

yourinstagram 💋 smooches for @austinbutler

view all comments

glenpowell Austin Butler is one lucky lucky man

fan13 not glen in the comment section please

user13 this gets cuter when you realize she was actually kissing him through the glass 😭❤️

oliviadejonge absolute stunner 🥀

austinbutler Get over here right now

liked by fan12, user13 and 988 others

enews Austin Butler and girlfriend spotted sharing a few cuddles and kisses while on a date! We all know how much they love their smooches 😚

view all comments

user21 one hand on her back, other in her pocket this man knows he’s fine

fan13 IM SO FUCKIN LONELY 😩

liked by ashleytisdale and 13794 others

austinbutler sweatin’ because my date is so hot

view all comments

ashleybee HAHA the caption 😂😂

yourinstagram lol u cheesy man 🫶🏻 ily

anthonyboyle He was probably so proud with it too 😂

keoghan ace mateeee 😌

ayoedibiri this is my favorite post you have ever posted

liked by keoghan92, zendaya, and 93166 others

austinbutler Took over lighting production during a visit on set and she killed it !!

view all comments

florencepugh I’m so mad you didn’t bring her on the Dune set

yourinstagram WHAT DO YOU MEAN I WAS THERE EVERY WEEKEND

florencepugh not enough. i needed you there every day.

yourinstagram Michael Mann said the job is mine 🤩

user13 y/n getting a job on the heat 2 set iktr!!!

liked by tchalamet, bazluhrmann, and 101766 others

austinbutler I want to do with you what spring does to cherry tress - Pablo Neruda

view all comments

fan23 … is everyone else also transfixed on her awesome boobs or am i a perv ?

oliviadejonge gorgeous girl

tomholland2013 aren’t we lucky boys mate?

ashleytisdale 😍😍😍

ayoedibiri she’s got you quoting pablo neruda and i completely understand why

yourinstagram if your boyfriend isn’t also your photographer break up with him

liked by catherinemartinedesigns and 89716 others

austinbutler 🕶️

view all comments

zendaya the coolest to ever do it

keoghan92 sickkkk

rileykeough Austin we’re gonna need you to release a book of all the photos you have of this gorgeous girl 🌚

ashleybee Her job is Cool Barbie

liked by ashleybee, anthonyboyle, and 67178 others

yourinstagram was my turn to snap a photo of this handsome guy who makes me the happiest i have ever been ♥️♾️ ‘love could be labeled poison and we’d drink it anyway’

view all comments

austinbutler oh no

yourinstagram taste of your own medicine mister lol

keoghan92 my teeth can’t handle the sweetness

florencepugh not one bad photo of either of you exists

ashleybee Having a big sister moment because he’s winked the same since he was like 5

yourinstagram can we look at baby pictures again 🥹

—

No disrespect intended to Austin’s current relationship, I respect their privacy but also I really wish Austin would post his gf, talk about her, all that good stuff I GET WHY HE DOESN’T 😭

also using Sydney Sweeney as a FC because I’m currently obsessed with her she’s awesome?? Brilliant ??? She is everything. Also I may have an idea for part 2 but it would be nsfw concerning leaked nudes and such but would anyone be interested in that? Lemme know! As always feel free to come chat 💬

[gimmethosedaddymilkers]

I Still Love You.

Okay, hi, yes, I am real, I do exist haha, anyway, I'm suffering in college but I miss writing for my cowboy so I'm gonna try to do some magic with this prompt from the lovely @photo1030 about our cowboy and us getting into a fight, the first fight, after they start dating.

SO

Let us start!

Warnings: Arguing obviously, swearing, Arthur feeling bad, you feeling bad, female reader, possibly 18+ themes. Modern Arthur AU

Definitely maybe projecting a little bit of myself into Y/N here but we aren't gonna mention that.

Also don't you dare make fun of me I haven't wrote much recently so my noggin doesn't work, all I know is homework

You scoffed, continuing to wash the dishes in your sink as you listen to Arthur rambling on, trying to make you 'see reason' as he put it.

Usually you couldn't find a single thing wrong with Arthur. For the most part he was the perfect man. Of course, he had his flaws, as all humans do, but you guys had NEVER had a fight before, but lately...you couldn't help but fume at him.

He was just....You loved him, and you loved being around him and typically nothing about him bothered you but....

You couldn't help it.

He was just so damn...Stubborn! All the time!

No matter what, he always had to be right. Doesn't matter exactly what it's about, but he has to be right, even if it's something that YOU know more about.

"Jus' listen to me Darlin', it'll be so much easier for us to do this if we jus'-"

"I told you Arthur, that's not it, that's not gonna work!"

You sigh and turn around, leaning on the lip of the sink, your arms crossed as you look at him.

"You know, JUST as much as I do, that if we want to move in together at some point that we should invest in a place for BOTH of us, not just me moving in with you or you moving in with me."

"It'll save us money if you jus' move in with me-"

"And it'll save our relationship if I don't feel like I'm a visitor in a place that I didn't purchase. That's YOUR apartment, with YOUR decorations, YOUR pots and pans, YOUR shower curtains, EVERYTHING is yours, and even if I brought some of my stuff in, it's not MY place or OUR place-"

"So now our relationship needs savin'?"

He snorts and copies your body language, crossing his own arms as he stares down at you.

"You livin' with me, regardless as to if it's at your house or my apartment is the same as us buyin' a place together, and our relationship is just fine, it don't NEED savin'. At least I didn't think it did until ya said that."

"Oh my god, you are such a stubborn jackass."

You grind your teeth, standing up straight.

"It doesn't need saving, not YET. Arthur, a place of our own, together, would be better for the both of us, and you KNOW that."

"We would save much more money if we just moved in to one of the places we ALREADY own-"

"That wouldn't be OURS-"

"We would MAKE it OURS darlin'-"

"Arthur, why can't you understand-"

"Why can't YOU understand, I'm tryin' to save us money in the long run, money we can use to save up and buy a house later down the line, when we need one."

"Jesus, Arthur! How am I supposed to even move in with you in the first place when all you can do is try to prove you're right about everything all the damn time!"

You throw your hands up in defeat.

"You just have to always, always, always be right, don't you? You can't just understand or accept that someone else MIGHT be right!"

"You know damn well that ain't true!"

Arthur stands straight himself, putting his hands on his hips.

"I ain't tryin' to prove shit!,"

He pokes you in the chest, right under your collarbone

"I'm TRYIN' to make things easier on us! I'm tryin' to do somethin' good for the woman I love, but clearly you ain't very appreciative about it!"

"I would be, if you didn't always have to be so damn pushy, always 'oh well actually we should do this its smarter' shut UP Arthur, shut UP. It's not always your way or the highway!"

You smack his hand away, scowling at him as he shakes his hand and puts it back on his hip.

"You know how awful, how fucking stupid you make me feel, all the time!? Even when I'm RIGHT, you make me feel stupid because there's always some other way that we can do things that you always deem 'better'. What is it? You just don't like the fact that I can do things? That SOMETIMES, I have good ideas?"

"What? What the hell are you talkin' about?"

"You know what I'm talking about-"

"I don't!"

He groans in frustration and moves to your fridge, opening it to get a beer out.

"Oh, and you're gonna help yourself to my drinks too, right? That I paid for?"

"This ain't even yours! I bought these, I brought 'em over for me when I visit! You don't even like this brand, hell you drink them fuckin' fruity drinks, the what....the Smirnoff or whatever the fuck it is."

He pops the bottle cap off.

"'Sides, what's the matter? You ain't never been upset about sharin' with me before."

"It's not the point!"

You groan and move past him into the living room.

"The point is Arthur, you always have to be right. Always. You make me feel like an idiot. Even if I know something more than you. Hell you'd tell me I was wrong if I was talking about what I majored in, in college."

"Oh I would not-"

He states, following you into the living room.

"You just did it again! Just there!"

"I ain't doin' shit!"

"AND AGAIN!"

Arthur gives a huff and puts his drink down on the coffee table, pinching the bridge of his nose with his other hand.

"Look, Darlin', all I'm sayin' is, if we make a budget and live together at my place, or at yours, we can save up money, and EVENTUALLY get a place together. a NICE place. A GOOD place, that's big enough for us, and what I HOPE is eventually our family."

"Why can't we buy a place that's already a good place?"

"You have to have MONEY Y/N!"

Arthur closes his eyes briefly, and crosses his arms again.

"Christ, Y/N do you ever fucking listen?"

"Oh like you're any better-"

"I am!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck you!"

The two of you stare at one another, fuming, both of you clenching your jaws.

"Get out."

You murmur softly.

"Get out and go home."

"Really? You're gonna kick me out?"

"Yes, go!"

Arthur stares at you for a moment, and then moves around the couch and takes a seat, kicking his feet up on the coffee table after grabbing his beer.

"No. Not until we talk this through. I ain't lettin' either one of us walk away angry."

You angrily groan and turn away from him, going to your bedroom. You slam the door shut behind you and lock it.

You take the time to breathe, putting your hands through your hair, trying to keep yourself from being too angry.

You move to your bed and take a seat, letting yourself think.

Granted, yes, neither of you had been extremely awful to one another, but you had said some pretty mean things, and after sitting there for about twenty minutes you started to spiral.

That was a dick move of you. A dick move of him too but...what if....

You shouldn't have said anything like that to him, calling him a stubborn jackass, telling him to fuck off, you shouldn't have said those things.

You think it over more and more, and the longer you think about it, the guiltier you feel.

Accusing him of taking your food, when you always share your stuff with him anyway, intentionally starting a fight basically.

Its another ten minutes of thinking about how you'd yelled at him, and then you can't take it.

You unlock your door and come out to find Arthur still on the couch, his arms crossed as he looks up at you.

"You done throwin' a temper tantrum, Y/N?"

You go to speak and surprisingly you find yourself choked up.

"I'm...I...I'm sorry, Arthur I..."

You can feel yourself beginning to tear up and you try to wipe your eyes without it being too obvious, but Arthur was able to see it clearly.

"Woah, hey-"

He's quick to get up and move to you, taking your face in his hands.

"Whatchu cryin' for Darlin'? It ain't that big a deal, it's jus' a spat, that's all..."

He keeps his voice hushed, doing his best to try and soothe you.

You just can't help but feel...absurdly guilty, and all the sudden, worried.

"You aren't gonna run away from me, are you?"

You question, looking up at him.

"You aren't gonna leave me?"

"What? What on earth, no!"

He pulls you closer, bringing your head to his chest, wrapping an arm around your head.

"Jesus, Sweetheart no, I'm not leavin' you, it ain't that big a deal, it ain't that bad...it was just a little spat, an argument, couples have 'em all the time...."

He murmurs, and quietly kisses the top of your head.

"I shouldn't have called you a jackass, and I shouldn't have told you to fuck off, and I'm sorry-"

You ramble on, hugging yourself tightly to him.

"I'm really happy you want me to move in with you, I want to move in with you, I love you, I don't mean anything, I don't want you to back out of it, I don't wanna push you away-"

"Darlin', Y/N, please, calm down, okay, sit with me."

He gently guides you to the couch and sits with you, still holding you close to him.

"Sweetheart, I'm not breaking up with you, you haven't pushed me away, and you certainly aren't gonna cause me to back out."

He chuckles quietly and kisses your head again.

"It's just a little argument. That's all it is, that's it. It's nothin' to break us up over. Couples have fights all the time, it's alright."

"I know..."

You breathe out quietly, his voice was certainly soothing you.

Pulling away from him, you look up at him.

"I am sorry though, I am. I shouldn't have said those things....We should talk, seriously talk, take a minute, and CALMLY talk about the whole housing thing we want to do, I don't wanna argue about it anymore..."

"Sweetheart, it's okay, really it is."

He smiles and takes your hand.

"We can sit and talk, that's okay, but you don't have to apologize, I do. Alright? You're right, I tend to try and prove I'm right, and that ain't fair....So we'll talk, okay?"

He smiles at you, and he brushes some of your hair away from your face, looking you in the eyes as he does. That little smile of his is always enough to make your heart melt, and in this case it does plenty to soothe those worries that had so easily snuck up on you.

"Honey, it's alright...really, I mean that."

You nod and breathe quietly.

"I am still sorry Arthur."

"So am I, but I promise...nothing bad is gonna happen between us, okay, nothing."

He smiles.

"Well, good things will." He adds, and chuckles quietly. "We'll sit down and talk, and for tonight-"

He moves, and puts his finger under your chin, making you look up at him.

"I'm gonna take care of you, alright? I'm gonna make sure, you have a good time tonight, we'll have a movie night, and I will make dinner, you're favorite even."

You can't help but chuckle and lean in, kissing him softly.

"Thank you, thank you Arthur, I love you so much and I'm so...so sorry again."

"Stop sayin' sorry, okay? We're both idiots."

That makes you chuckle, and you lean your head against his shoulder, scooting closer.

It was a good feeling, knowing that if you had further arguments, which, you would, as couples do, you could work things out....that he wasn't going to abandon you.

He's a good man, and you...are good too.

[floralcyanidee]

ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪᴘs, ᴍʏ ʟɪᴘs, ᴀᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘsᴇ - ᴄɪʟʟɪᴀɴ ᴍᴜʀᴘʜʏ

Young!Cillian Murphy x AFAB!Reader (NSFW)

A night over at your best friend, Cillian's, leads to something more than friendship but something less than romance. Will you ever tell him how you feel, or will you always just be friends with benefits?

warnings: smut, nipple play, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, oral sex, cock warming, friends with benefits, friends to lovers, dirty talk, squirting, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, hair pulling, mentions of choking, love confessions

word count: 4409

author’s note: I'm shadowbanned on my main account everyone please clap (not for nsfw, I was flagged for spam yay) so I'll be posting on this shiny new blog, ao3, and wattpad for the time being. (those are both linked on my masterpost) hopefully I'll be unbanned soon because I've had my main tumblr for a decade and it has 2.5k followers on it and I'll fr cry my eyes out if I can't get unbanned!!! anyway please enjoy this!! I wrote a good chunk of this while at work this week. the horny really unleashes in the second part haha. please leave feedback if you enjoy! <3

PLEASE FOLLOW THIS BLOG. BUT ALSO, DO NOT UNFOLLOW MY MAIN BLOG!

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ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ, ʀᴇᴘʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴇ, ᴏʀ ᴄʟᴀɪᴍ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜʀs ᴏɴ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ, ᴀᴏ3, ᴡᴀᴛᴛᴘᴀᴅ, ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴇʙsɪᴛᴇ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪssɪᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴜsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ɪɴ ᴀɪ ɢᴇɴᴇʀᴀᴛᴏʀs ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀʀᴛɪғɪᴄɪᴀʟ ɪɴᴛᴇʟʟɪɢᴇɴᴄᴇ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀʏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴜsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ᴛᴏ sᴇʟʟ ғᴏʀ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴡɴ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛɪᴏɴ

Cillian’s lips hover over yours, and you can feel his warm breath hitting your face. His eyelashes almost touch your cheeks, and his nose is beside yours, barely brushing against it. 

“I want you so bad,” Cillian whispers, his hands finding your hips.

You have been friends since the 90s when Cillian first arrived in Hollywood, stumbling upon you at a local bar where you worked. Ever since, you’ve both been the best of friends. But tonight, that’s being challenged. The lights in Cillian’s place are dimmed, candles are lit, and wine is flowing through the two of you. Having a bit to drink in a comfortable setting isn’t out of the norm, but for some reason, tensions were high tonight. You could almost cut it with a knife. Everything about him is more mesmerizing tonight- his eyes, his freckles, the way he smiles. You needed him, and apparently, he needed you too. 

“Then have me,” you mutter against Cillian’s lips.

He chuckles humorlessly, shaking his head slightly, “I don’t want to ruin us.”

“You won’t,” you look down at his lips- they’re so close to yours that you can feel them move whenever he speaks.

“Promise?”

“I promise,” you breathe, grabbing hold of Cillian’s face as he finally puts his mouth on yours.

The kiss immediately becomes hungry, your teeth nearly clashing together as Cillian slips his tongue around yours. He’s gripping your hips fiercely, and his sideburns press pleasantly into your palms as you hold his head steady. Cillian pulls you onto his lap from your sitting position on the couch next to him, seating you firmly on his thighs. Your fingers find his hair, tugging it slightly as a small whimper vibrates in Cillian’s throat. The sound spurs you on, and you take over the kiss, dominating his tongue with yours. You explore his mouth and suck on his tongue harshly, pulling away from the embrace to catch your breath.

“Fuck,” Cillian curses, leaning his forehead against yours, “You’re good at this.”

You scoff, putting both your hands on his cheeks as you trace your thumb along his sharp cheekbones, “And to think you would’ve never known.”

“Not necessarily,” Cillian looks you in the eyes, “I would’ve gotten you one way or another.”

“Then why have you waited so long, then? Hmm?” you ask.

“I value our friendship,” Cillian admits.

“I do, too, Cill. But god, if I had known you were so good at kissing, I would’ve done it ages ago,” you smirk, running your finger across his bottom lip.

His eyes follow your movements before they flick up to yours, darkening, “I’m not just good at that.”

His words shoot straight to your lower belly, warmth spreading through you, “Is that right?”

“Mhmm,” Cillian pulls you closer to his chest, your core settling right on his.

“Show me.”

Cillian attacks your lips again, this time biting down on your lower lip and rolling it between his teeth. You watch his face as he does it, his icy eyes becoming a darker shade of blue. His hand moves from your hip to your hair, his fingers sliding through your locks before they tighten, pulling your head backward to expose your neck. Cillian leaves hot, open-mouthed kisses along the column of your neck, licking a stripe up the side before he bites at the skin, leaving a small bruise to form below your jaw. You squirm slightly at the feeling of his teeth pressing into your skin, dangerously close to breaking its surface. Cillian then kisses your collarbones, stopping when he reaches the neck of your shirt, well, his shirt. You always took from his wardrobe, whether it was a beanie, t-shirt, or hoodie that he forgot he had. He slides his hand from your hip to underneath the shirt, pressing his palm to your feverish skin and pushing it up slowly until he reaches your breast. 

“No bra?” Cillian asks, surprised.

“I never wear a bra when I’m over here,” you admit, “I’m surprised you’ve never noticed.”

“I’m glad I never noticed, or else I’d be underneath your shirt constantly,” Cillian pulls his hand from your hair to move it under the shirt along with the other.

“Doesn’t sound too bad to me,” you giggle, but it’s cut off by a quiet moan when Cillian grasps your breasts.

Cillian brushes his thumbs over your nipples, circling the buds as they harden under his touch. You hum, letting your head fall back at the sensation. Cillian pushes the shirt up and over your chest, and you help him pull it all the way off, tossing it somewhere in the living room. Immediately, Cillian latches onto one of your nipples, toying with the other one with his fingers. Electricity shoots to your still-clothed core, and you know that Cillian can feel you beginning to throb through your thin shorts. His playing with your breasts could get you off alone; his touch is like nothing you’ve ever felt before. It’s sometimes sensual and soft and rough and firm when needed. Cillian grazes his teeth over the sensitive bud, pulling it toward him as you let out a yelp. You involuntarily bare down on his lap and feel him growing harder underneath you. He lands a slap to your breast, and you gasp, hands going to grip his biceps to ground yourself. 

“I can feel you getting excited,” Cillian teases, raising his hips a little to let all your weight sit on him momentarily.

“What are you gonna do about it, then?” you stifle a moan at his bulge pressing into your clit harshly.

Cillian pushes you off his lap and onto the couch, where he spreads your legs and yanks your shorts down your thighs, discarding them wherever the shirt also previously went. He pulls your calves onto his shoulders, laying on his chest between your thighs. His breath hits your dampened underwear, sending goosebumps across your skin. You bite your lip as Cillian plays with the edges of your underwear right against where you need him most. He toys with the fabric, letting his fingers barely touch you underneath. 

“I’ve waited so long for this,” Cillian confesses, his intense eyes flickering up to your face.

You feel your cheeks burn, “Me too.”

Cillian smiles his typical beautiful smile, teeth and all, as he pulls your underwear down your legs painfully slow, “I’ve always imagined how wet you’d get just from me teasing you.”

You bite back a whimper as he removes your underwear from your legs, letting them fall to the floor. 

“You’d get soaked from me playing with your pussy, rubbing your clit slowly, and eating you out until you cry,” Cillian lets his filthy words fall from his lips as you shiver from them, wanting to close your legs subconsciously.

But they were perched on Cillian’s shoulders, and he was about to go in for the kill. He kneads your thigh before pushing it to the side, letting it drape off the edge of the couch and opening you up further to him. Cillian’s fingers brush against your hardening clit like it’s the most delicate thing in the world, making you tremble as you grunt from the sensual feeling.

“Please,” you sigh, your hips jerking up when Cillian pulls his hand away.

“Please, what?”

“Touch me, Cill. God, I need you to touch me.”

Cillian strokes your entrance with his index finger, gathering your wetness before dragging it up to your clit. He circles the bundle of nerves slowly, making you whine above him. 

“So wet already,” Cillian moans, “You’re so beautiful.”

You throw your head back against the arm of the couch when Cillian finally replaces his finger with the tip of his tongue, going around and around the sensitive bud, never coming directly in contact with it. He changes his mind about that and starts to lap at your clit, flicking his tongue over it as his fingers travel back to your now-dripping entrance. Cillian hums in satisfaction at the feeling of your arousal seeping out of you at his expense. He flattens his tongue and licks a fat stripe up your slit before swirling his tongue around your clit, his tongue still flat and giving your entire bundle of nerves attention. Cillian probes you with a single finger, pushing it in as you moan his name. He pumps it in and out of you, curling it against your g spot with every thrust. He adds a second finger, and the sound of your wetness grows louder, mixing with your breathy moans and Cillian’s pants. 

“Say my name again,” Cillian bites his lip, watching as his soaked fingers move in and out of you.

“Cillian,” you whine, moving your hips along with his fingers.

“That’s right, fuck yourself on my fingers, darling,” he says, adding a third finger in you.

To say you‘re a mess is an understatement. You need Cillian inside you, as your walls are clenching around his fingers with desperation. You grab his shirt, “Fuck me, please.”

“Thought you’d never ask,” Cillian smirks, lifting his shirt off his lean body before standing up to tug his pants and underwear down and off his legs. 

Cillian teases your clit with his leaking head before lining himself up with you. He looks at you with an unsure expression, and you nod in response to the unspoken question. He slowly pushes himself into you, your warmth already fluttering around him. Cillian guides himself all the way to his hilt, letting out a throaty groan when he feels his entire length surrounded by your velvety walls. His hands run up and down your abdomen, stopping when he palms over your breasts. They’re still sensitive from the previous activity and your growing arousal, causing you to wriggle when Cillian’s fingers deftly pinch at both your nipples as he slowly pulls himself almost out of you entirely before slamming back into you. You cry out, your hands flying to where his back meets his shoulders, nails digging softly into his flesh. Cillian moans when you clench harshly around him when he tugs at your nipple particularly hard. 

“You like these pretty titties to be played with, huh?” Cillian runs his tongue along his bottom lip as he watches your face twist in pleasure when he pulls at the sensitive skin.

You nod, but he lets go of your breasts, running his hands over your body before his hand snakes between the two of you, rubbing tight circles on your clit. You let out a throaty moan, and Cillian curses under his breath as his hips snap against yours at a steady rhythm. 

“Fuuuuck,” you drawl, eyes rolling into the back of your head as your body heaves into the couch from the velocity of Cillian’s perfect cock slamming into you without mercy, “You feel so good inside of me.”

You push Cillian up and off you, shoving him onto the couch behind him. You climb on his lap, throwing your legs over his thighs as you line him back up with your aching cunt. Feeling him stretch you out completely while at a different angle makes you moan uncontrollably as you set a pace, riding Cillian as if your life depended on it. Your ass slaps his hips as he guides them up and down, thrusting into you dead-on. Cillian’s tip hits your cervix flawlessly, and you feel that tightness in your belly. 

“Cum inside me, Cillian,” you swivel your hips, “Fill me up and make me yours.”

“Gonna cum around my cock first?” Cillian’s lips are swollen from incessantly biting as he watches you fuck yourself on him.

You decide you’ll milk him for all he’s got and lean down to land a bruising kiss on his lips. Both of you pant into each other’s mouths as you near your peak, reaching underneath you to flick your clit. Cillian grips your ass as you feel yourself unravel, your orgasm ripping through you. Your walls cave in on CIllian’s length, causing him to reach his own orgasm before he’s ready. He squirms underneath you as you continue to bounce on his cock, coaxing every drop of cum out of him. 

“Fuck,” Cillian exhales as he runs a hand through his sweaty hair, looking just as fucked out as you.

You lay down on his chest, him still inside you. He doesn’t bother moving either; the feeling of you still cloaked around him made him dizzy. Cillian is still trying to wrap his head around how this is real. He also is trying to figure out where to go from here. He’s terrified of telling you his true feelings for you, fearing you won’t want to be friends anymore. Obviously, tonight the dynamic has changed from just friendship between the two of you. 

“I can’t tell you how long I’ve been waiting for that,” you trace shapes into Cillian’s bare chest, peering up at him when he doesn’t answer. 

He appears deep in thought.

“Everything okay?” you ask, furrowing your eyebrows at the man underneath you.

Cillian nods, his hand finding your hair before stroking it softly, “Just thinking.”

“About?” you rest your chest on his collarbone.

“How much I’d like to do this again,” Cillian says, and you chuckle.

“That can be arranged,” you leave a kiss on his neck, his eyes meeting yours through his eyelashes.

“I don’t want to ruin our friendship, though,” Cillian says worriedly.

“You haven’t ruined anything. And I’ve had just as much to do with this as you,” you say, putting your finger under Cillian’s chin to look at him directly, “You’re still my best friend.”

“And you’re fine with whatever this is?”

“It’s the best of both worlds,” you shrug with a smile. 

Cillian moves to sit up against the couch's armrest still sheathed inside you. And as you start yet another make out session and begin to rock your hips with your walls still hugging his cock, you try not to think. The idea that you must hide your feelings for Cillian even more is hard to wrap your mind around.

But little did you know, he was having the same problem. He tries not to think about it as he thrusts into you sloppily, letting you ride him as you please. 

—

“Jesus, shit!”

“God, you’re so fucking drenched. All of this for me?”

“Uh-huh,” you whimper, letting out a pornographic moan as one of Cillian’s hands holds your swollen cunt open while the other rubs at it vigorously.

“Just like that-” Cillian moans at the sounds you’re letting out, “Need you to cum on my face, pretty thing.”

You cry out, rocking your hips against Cillian’s merciless hand as it flies across your pussy with no sign of stopping. He pokes out his middle finger to catch your clit with every swipe of his hand. Your orgasm explodes in your stomach, your core gushing cum as Cillian hurries to dip his face down. He latches his mouth onto your cunt, flicking his tongue over your bundle of nerves, causing you to squirt again. 

“Fuuuck,” you squeal, your hands gripping Cillian’s hair like a vice.

Cillian can’t get enough. He’s not gonna lie, he thinks he’s absolutely obsessed with making you squirt. He could do it all night and still get off at the sight. Cillian laps at your pussy, spreading his tongue around your folds, stimulating the sensitive area further.

“Cill, I’m gonna cum again,” you warn, but Cillian just keeps his eyes closed as he sneaks two fingers inside you.

His fingertips brush against your g spot and send you over the edge a third time, and Cillian’s nipping at your clit causes you to gush again. You were slightly embarrassed but incredibly turned on by it. And you know Cillian is relishing in it, literally and figuratively. He pulls away from you, a little reluctantly, and wipes his mouth and face with the back of his arm. You grab his face and pull him into you as he collapses on your naked, heaving chest. You stare at Cillian, the light from the side table’s lamp shining into his eyes just right. They’re returning to an arctic blue as his heart rate calms, his pupils going back to normal size. Cillian stares back at you, studying your features just as you are his. Freckles sprinkle Cillian’s cheeks and nose, dotting along his forehead and chin as well. His lips are red and swollen, and he’s sporting a lopsided smile as he looks at you. 

“You’re perfect,” you whisper, combing your fingers through his hair, “Literally everything you do, say, and how you look is just flawless. Are you sure you aren’t an angel?” you joke.

A smile spreads upon Cillian’s face as his cheeks tinge pink, the warmth traveling to his ears, “I’m not perfect by any means, and no, I’m not an angel,” he says, his accent thick and raspy from the previous exertion. 

“Mmm, I’m not sure about that,” you say as CIllian softly kisses your neck.

God, I love you, you want to say. Because you do; you love him. You always have, but sharing such intimate moments with Cillian has just strengthened the feeling you already had. You’re honestly exhausted but still blissed out from Cillian going absolutely feral on you. You have never squirted before, and if you could, you’d let him make you squirt all night. You’d watch as your arousal covers his pretty face, delighting him much like it did earlier. Cillian looked like a kid in a candy store as you gushed for him. 

“I’ve never squirted before, so,” you mutter, covering your face with your hands, “Yeah, I’d consider that angelic.”

“Really?” Cillian asks incredulously, “Never? Not even by yourself?”

“Especially not by myself,” you chuckle, uncovering your face to look at Cillian, “You’re better than any vibrator or dildo I own.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Cillian bites your jaw playfully before reaching down and grabbing the duvet, covering the both of you with it.

He rolls off you, much to your dismay. But he immediately pulls you into his chest, holding you tightly with his arms as if you’ll disappear. Cillian slides a leg between yours, his knee pressed against you softly. He rubs his nose against your ear, “Still wet, pretty?”

“Shut up,” you mutter shyly, burying your face in his arms.

“Only if you make me,” Cillian teases you, nipping at your earlobe.

You groan, “Too tired,” you feel Cillian’s hand travel down your navel to gauge how wet you still are, “I don’t think I can move.”

“Who said you had to move?” Cillian asks, pulling your thigh up until your leg is draped over his hip, spreading you open for perfect access.

Before you can ask him to touch you, Cillian lines his length up with your still-needy cunt. You’re surprised you had any remainder of horniness left in you. But there’s something about Cillian that naturally turns you on. You’ve noticed it’s gotten more intense now that he’s your sexual partner. It’s like you can’t get enough of him, and he can’t get enough of you, either. Cillian nudges his tip into you before letting it glide in without a hitch. The way you’re laying makes the angle at which he’s inside of you feel irresistible. You let Cillian play with your still-sensitive clit as his hips snap into your ass. His hot, heavy breath is in your ear as he fucks you slowly. You toss your arm behind you, grabbing the back of Cillian’s neck for leverage as you turn your head around. His lips meet yours hungrily, and he swallows your guttural moans as you fuck yourself on his cock. Cillian’s other hand snakes from underneath you, his fingers wrapping around your throat. He doesn’t press them into your skin but lets them rest there, almost possessively. 

You’ve been exploring each other’s bodies ever since the first night you had sex- trying different angles and positions. But you told Cillian that you didn’t want anything rough. That was reserved for a romantic relationship. Cillian felt a twinge of hurt in his chest when you said that, as if you had meant you weren’t planning on a romantic relationship with him specifically. But he understood and respected your boundaries despite his weird sadness about not being able to do certain things with you. Cillian thought it odd because you were not his, so he had no right to hurt you consensually or mark you as his. So, he shouldn’t be so upset about it. Yet he is because he wants you to trust him with everything you have, and he wants to take care of you after the roughness. Cillian wants you to be taken care of. But he knows his limits and that he can’t break the rules of the friends-with-benefits situation. So Cillian doesn’t choke you during sex, or slap you, or kiss you outside the bedroom- especially in public. He bites his tongue every time you do something that melts his heart. He refrains from saying those three little words every day. Cillian has no idea how much you wished he would break the rules just once or how you wished he’d say he loves you. 

Something comes over you, though. You reach a hand up and cover Cillian’s that is on your neck and press his fingers into the sides of your throat. You sigh contently as your head becomes cloudy from the lack of blood flow to your head. Cillian stops rubbing your clit and takes your hand from over his, slipping his fingers between yours and pinning it in front of you.

You whimper in detest, and Cillian nips at the skin behind your ear, “Naughty thing. Don’t break your own rules, sweetheart.”

You sigh in defeat, but before you can pout, a moan rips through your chest. Cillian pushed your clave up into your thigh, thus making it easier for him to ram his cock against your cervix in a way that sends stars floating across your vision. Your hand squeezes his as you feel your release creeping up.

“I’m gonna cum,” you whisper, watching as Cillian’s length moves in and out of you quickly.

It was erotic yet romantic, him being so close to you and inside you. You and Cillian are now one, but you wish things were different. 

“Good,” Cillian kisses the back of your neck, his nose drawing circles in your skin delicately.

You breathe deeply, feeling your stomach clench. You cry out Cillian’s name as you unravel, his fingers pressing to your clit. Your body trembles and shakes as he continues his assault on the bundle of nerves, still chasing after his own high as he keeps thrusting into you. Your back arches, toes curling as another wave of pleasure hits you. 

“You’re doing so good, angel,” Cillian praises in your ear, “Taking my cock so well. I’m almost there, just hold on.”

The feeling of Cillian exploding inside you sends you over the edge for the third and final time. Stars erupt behind your eyelids, your body convulsing from pleasure. Your pussy clenches around him as he rides out his orgasm, panting in your ear. He almost doesn’t hear you say it. Almost.

“Fuck, I love you,” you whine quietly.

You gasp, immediately realizing what’s slipped from your mouth in a shroud of cloudy pleasure. But you hide your gasp as you catch your breath, inhaling and exhaling sharply. You pray to whatever is out there that Cillian didn’t hear you proclaim your feelings in a vulnerable moment.

Cillian grunts as he pulls out of you, letting your leg go limp and relax back on the bed. He keeps his hand entangled with yours. But you pull your grasp out of his, turning around and facing him. You hurriedly bury your face in his chest so you can’t look at him and see how he’s possibly reacting to your words. Cillian wordlessly wraps his arms around you, pulling you even closer to him. You fight the urge to cry at the silence of the dimly lit room as Cillian tugs the duvet over your sweaty, naked bodies. You try and steady your breath and keep your heart from racing.

“Can you say it again?” Cillian finally asks after several minutes of dead silence.

You lift your head from his chest, looking at him confused, “Say what?”

Cillian looks at you seriously before lifting his hand to touch your face gingerly, “What you said a moment ago.”

“You didn’t hear that, did y-”

“I did. But I want you to say again.”

Tears brim your eyes as you feel heaviness in your chest- will he make fun of you? Did you just ruin everything?

You let out a choked sob, hiding your face in his neck, “I love you. I fucking love you. There, I said it,” you slam your fist against his chest. “Feel free to hate me, but it’s true.”

“I could never hate you, gorgeous,” Cillian pulls away from you, his hands grabbing your cheeks so you’re looking directly at him.

His eyelashes flutter against your cheekbones, much like they did the first time you kissed him weeks ago. You blink away your tears, but Cillian wipes them away with his thumbs.

“I love you too,” Cillian confesses, “I love you so much. You know that?”

Your lips tremble as you nod, but Cillian presses his forehead against yours, and you try to ground yourself. He loves you. Cillian loves you back. Cillian kisses your lips gently as if he’d break you. You grasp his hair, kissing him back passionately.  

“I love you,” you say, pulling away from his lips and kissing his eyelids instead.

“I love everything about you,” you brush your lips across his cheeks, then kiss his nose, “Your angel kisses. Your beautiful eyes. Everything about you. I wasn’t lying when I said you’re perfect.”

Cillian laughs, and you melt at his smile.

“You,” Cillian says, “Are everything to me. Everything that brings me joy, everything that makes me happy.”

You wrap your arms around Cillian’s neck, pulling him close to you as you tuck your face into his neck.

“Never let go,” Cillian says, his arms snaking around your waist and holding you close.

“I won’t,” you say, a heaviness lifting from your chest at last, “I never will.”

taglist:

@baizzhu @aporiasposts @hjmalmed @queenshelby @amanda08319 @naty-1001 @orijanko @raineeace @nela-cutie @cutexlr @flwrs4aust @langdons-slut @shynovelist

[iamqueenpotato]

I Hate That I Love You- Part Four

Azriel x Reader

A/N- Hi beautiful people! Here is part four! I hope you all had a wonderful Easter yesterday if you celebrate it. If not, I hope you had a wonderful Sunday :) This part was surprisingly longer than I thought it was going to be. Also, I made a header for this fic. I thought it may be easier than finding random photos of nature for each part haha okay I'm done rambling, enjoy!!

⚠️: None(I think)

Word Count: 3.5k

Part One

You absolutely despised this place. Two days in, and you were over it. You hoped there was something of importance to report to Rhys, but there was absolutely nothing different about this camp. The fact of not finding anything started getting on your nerves. And of course, Azriel was as well.

You knew sharing that cabin would be an interesting venture, but he was everywhere. Always waiting in the sitting room or in the kitchen. He lingered and yet never said a word to you, but then again, you left the rooms so quick you never gave him the chance to speak. But after being cooped up in your room for hours, you decided to leave the cabin, wearing your leathers. You walked out the door, and there he was, chopping up wood off to the side. Shirtless.

Your eyes lingered for far too long, the way his arms flexed as he chopped each piece of wood, the sweat that gathered on his abdomen even though it was freezing outside, you knew he was stunning but in this moment you were reminded of it. You stared long enough that his shadows alerted him of your presence. You quickly moved your gaze away, a blush creeping up your cheeks. But you knew he caught you staring. He placed the axe down before walking towards you. You met him halfway.

“Shouldn’t you put a shirt on?” You asked, not moving your eyes from the tree behind him.

“Does it distract you?” He cocked an eyebrow, a small grin on his face.

“Don’t see why it would.” You then looked at him. The second your eyes locked, it was as if he lost all confidence. You brushed past him, not wanting to waste anymore time around him.

“Where are you going?” He caught your arm, pulling you back to face him.

“To do our job.” You pulled his hand off you. Letting it fall back to his side. And to be far from you. “I will be back by dinner.” You moved past him again. Leaving him and the cabin far in the distance.

It was the same thing as the last time you walked around this camp. No one seemed out of place or acted like they were doing something they weren’t supposed to. But you weren’t ready to go back yet. Perhaps if you waited a couple more hours, Azriel would have left.

You sat down on a nearby bench, attempting to control your breathing. You couldn’t stop replaying the hurt look on his face when you told him the two of you shouldn't be acquainted anymore. Why did it have to be so frustrating? Why did your heart and mind have to betray you so? Why couldn’t you just move on.

You closed your eyes, focusing on the rapid beats of your heart and not the way his entire being took over your mind. To say you were annoyed was an understatement. It was as though the universe only wanted to remind you of the torment your heart had been through.

“You dont belong here. Females don’t serve a purpose unless they are in the kitchen or the bed.” A male spoke up, causing an eruption of laughter to echo throughout the camp. You opened your eyes, finding a group of males around you.

You stood from your seated position on the bench, straightening your leathers. “So what I’m hearing is the only thing in your miserable life that has purpose is your hand?”

The males fell silent. The one that spoke bared his teeth at you. “Let’s see what sort of warrior you are.”

“I dont want to hurt your manhood.” Your tone was stoic, unbothered.

“You truly think you can beat me?”

You looked at your challenger, he was twice your size, muscles filling each inch of his leathers. Scars decorating his face.

It's too easy. “Don’t go crying to your comrades when you get beat by a female.” You teased, stretching as the other warriors moved in tandem to form a circle around the two of you.

Widening your stance, you brought your closed fists up your face, watching as he did the same.

The male advanced first, throwing hits left and right, but with simple slips to each side, you easily dodged them.

He left his chest open instead of guarding his body the moment after attempting to knock you down. So you threw your fist, colliding it with his diaphragm, sending him flying backward, unable to catch his breath. He attempted to stand from his kneeled position, but you were on him in an instant. Landing a solid right hook to his jaw. You threw yourself behind him, holding him within a chokehold. There was a part of you that wished he put up more of a fight. The mother knows you had more anger to spare.

He tried to break free, but you held your stance firmly, pulling tighter on your hold. Until you felt those taps on your forearm, did you let go.

The circle of Illyrians around you gasped and snickered as you pushed the male off of you. Not sparing a single glance towards any of them as you walked out the circle, wiping the small bit of sweat from your brow.

You found your seat back on the same bench, watching as two males helped your opponent off the ground. You gave him a slight wave, smiling as he kept his gaze to the ground.

“That was quite intriguing to watch, quick and efficient. Good.” An unfamiliar voice spoke up from behind you.

You turned to face him. He was an older male. Dark brown eyes and gray hair. He wore Illyrian leathers but you had never seen him before. His wings had plenty of marks and scars from battles, but his demeanor was off, like he was hiding something, being somewhere he wasn’t allowed. Secrecy loomed over his entire being. He held his hands behind his back, staring down at you with curious eyes.

Overall, he made you uncomfortable.

“Thanks.” You turned away from him, hoping he would take the hint. But instead, he walked around, standing right in front of you. “Can I help you?”

“I dont believe we’ve met. What is your name?” The man questioned, kneeling down in front of you.

“Why does it matter?” You stood from your seat, avoiding stepping any closer to him. There was something about this man that had put your nerves completely on edge. Maybe it was the tone in his voice or how he looked at you.

You sensed his movements, the arm that was outstretched to grab you. Pivoting, you snatched his wrist. He smiled. “Such talent. And heightened senses. Is each member of the inner circle as talented?” His smile grew wider, and you dropped his wrist.

“Who are you?” You placed your hand on your dagger that you had strapped to your thigh. Moving backward a few steps.

But the sound of footsteps behind you made you turn, your dagger held firmly in your grip toward whoever approached. You found an Illyrian warrior, his hands raised in surrender. You lowered your blade, and when you turned back around, the other male had disappeared as if he wasn’t even there in the first place. “Did you see that man?”

The other male shook his head, looking around the area with you as you spun in all different directions. You re-sheathed your dagger, mentally noting each feature of the strange male. You would have to talk to Rhys about it when you returned.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m Surin.” He held out his hand, you took it warily. “I wanted to offer you a drink.”

“For what?” You responded, eyeing the Illyrian for any tells of something peculiar.

“For kicking Besian’s ass.” Surin smiled, his wings relaxing behind him. “That brute has been giving me hell for the last month, it was quite satisfying to see him laying on the ground so defeated,” You smiled this time, you could tell this male meant no harm. “So that drink?” He asked once more. You nodded, letting him lead the way.

Surin was an attractive male, though he didn’t look like most Illyrians. He had blonde curly hair and soft green eyes. His tan skin was painted with the few scars he had, but his features didn’t give off that war scorned look. You didn’t know exactly what he did or what battles he faced but the torment of death and suffering hadn’t taken over his soul yet or perhaps he didn’t let it get to him as the others did.

The two of you sat close around a fire he put together on the outskirts of the camp, drinking some liquor that he had in his tent. The sun had fallen far behind the mountains. The bottle you shared was halfway gone. You were dressed down to just your undershirt and pants. Surin brought out a light jacket for you to wear, but you enjoyed the cool air that hit your skin. The two of you talked about whatever. You found out he never wanted to fight. Secretly, he wanted to be a baker, but his family sent him to train anyway. “So your boyfriend is okay with you fighting random Illyrian soldiers?” Surin changed the subject, and you only looked at him with a puzzled expression.

“What do you mean, boyfriend?” You questioned, but you choked on your drink as soon as you realized. “Azriel?!”

Surin laughed, filling your cup with more amber liquid. “We all thought the two of you were together.”

“What in the world made you think that?”

Surin took another long sip from his cup. “He was constantly around you. The two of you seemed connected at the hip. He was like this overprotective guard dog to you. Anytime one of us stared at you for too long, he stared us down with such anger. It terrified everyone.”

You laughed in disbelief. “We used to be best friends. But we were never together.” It hurt to speak the truth, but it needed to be said. “And never will be.”

“Well good to know.”

You looked over the rim of your glass at Surin. His cheeks were slightly red from the alcohol. “Why is that?”

Surin leaned closer. “I know this is very forward of me, but,” He stilled inches away from your face. “Can I kiss you?”

Maybe it was the liquor or the stress of being back and the desperate need for some sort of relief, but you nodded. Surin moved the glass away from your lips, his hand reaching up to hold your jaw as he moved in to kiss you.

His lips were soft, and he moved with purpose. You moved your hands around his neck, his other hand resting on your hip. He moaned softly against your mouth when you combed your fingers through his hair.

Surin closed the remaining space between you two, pressing his body against you, lowering you softly onto the ground below, his hands explored your body, lightly trailing underneath your shirt as he deepened the kiss, it had been awhile since you had been with someone, the way he touched you felt new, exciting.

“Y/N.” Azriel’s voice broke through the silence. Fantastic. Surin started kissing down your throat. Placing soft kisses across your collar bone. You were shocked that the male on top of you was unphased by the sudden interruption.

“What do you want, Azriel?” You groaned. And Surin froze.

“Shit.” Surin whispered against your skin. You could feel his entire body stiffen against yours. You rubbed your hand up and down his arm to let him know he had nothing to worry about. You turned your head to look at Azriel.

“You told me you would be back for dinner.” His voice was emotionless as the two of you stared at each other.

“My plans changed.” You felt Surin snicker on top of you. Causing you to smile. Azriel scoffed, not saying a word before disappearing into his shadows.

You turned back to Surin, kissing him quickly. “Let’s go somewhere else.”

He nodded, moving off of you to stand, helping you afterward. He leaned down, placing a kiss on the spot underneath your ear, his hands sliding across your waist. Sending shivers down your spine. “Lead the way Y/N” He whispered. You grabbed the bottle of liquor, walking him back to the cabin.

The morning after your head ached. The sunlight agitating your eyes. You vaguely remember Surin leaving, kissing you goodbye before he slipped through the door. To be honest, you didn’t know why you slept with him. Maybe it was just a distraction, but however you saw it, there was no going back. But you felt no regret.

You slipped into something more appropriate before heading to the kitchen. Only to find Azriel leaning against the counter, a scornful look pointed towards your direction. “What are you looking at?”

“Who left this morning?” He asked. His hardened glare never ceased.

“Oh you don’t remember? You rudely interrupted us last night by the fire. After that, I decided him and I needed somewhere more private.” You stated, and something flickered over Azriels eyes, anger possibly? No that’s not right. Your head was pounding too much to determine anything. His silence didn’t help either. You pulled a mug from the cabinet, looking back at Azriel. “Do you want the details or something?” You teased, noticing how bothered he was by the fact you had brought someone to bed, he seemed to show it clearly across his features, yet he could only stare at you, so you thought why not see how far you could get with this conversation.

You moved closer to him, never losing eye contact. “Do you want to know how he bent me over? How I screamed his name as I rode him to our climaxes? Is that what you want to hear?” Your voice grew louder, and yet he still remained silent, his shadows slowly creeping up and around his shoulders. He wasn't allowed to be bothered by this. He has no right to be this way toward you. “What changed Azriel? You would never care about such frivolous things. In fact, you ignored everything about me, and now you feel you have the right to judge me for everything I do. How the hell is that fair?” The anger had broke free. You couldn’t tell if you were screaming or the room surrounding the two of you got eerily quiet.

“You can’t trust those males.” He seethed, fists clenched at his side.

“Stay out of my sex life, Azriel. I don’t question your choices in females.” You bit back, leaning back against the counter. “How about you fly back to Velaris, fuck- Oh, sorry. Make love to your pretty little fiance. Maybe then you’ll be easier to deal with.” Azriel flinched. You struck a nerve within the shadowsinger. You knew you shouldn’t add fuel to the fire, but you weren’t going to hold back anymore. He deserved this. At least that is what you thought. “Perhaps then I can enjoy the company of more males while you’re gone.”

Without any warning, Azriel was on you in two strides. He caged you against the counter, his firm body pressed against yours. He grabbed your hair at the base of your skull, yanking it backward, forcing you to look up at him. Your heart pounded within your chest, your eyes wide as you gaped at him. There was no movement between the two of you, only the feeling of your chests rising and falling together. His face was too close to yours, your lips just a small movement away from his. His scent surrounded you like a fog. His eyes darkened, and there was no tell to what his motives were. It felt right but so wrong at the same time to be pressed against him like this. You knew you needed to push him off, but your limbs felt numb. “Get off of me.” You seethed, but your voice sounded breathless. You could only hope he didn’t notice what he did to you. The air between the two of you was blatantly tense. It was like each of you had a knife to the others back, unsure who would stab first. Yet it confused you only more. Why is there even tension at all? If you could even call it that. Maybe you had been too close to him for too long.

His hazel eyes shifted back and forth as if they were studying each and every one of your features. Deciding what his next move was going to be. He looked down at your lips, but you twisted your head to the side as much as you could against his grip. His eyes shifted back to yours. “We have training in an hour, go take a shower.” His voice was hoarse as he released his hold on your hair, backing far away from you. “You reek of sex.”

You watched as he stormed out the door. You looked around the cabin, trying to distract yourself in any way possible. Your eyes drifted towards the sink, filled with dirty dishes and an empty plate. Next to the sink sat a plate still filled with food. Did he cook last night? A sudden rush of guilt fell over you, your head spun, nothing made sense. You wanted to scream, to cry, but his touch had left your body frozen. You needed to calm your thoughts. Your only hope was that the shower would help. “I will not falter. I will stand tall.” You whispered over and over to yourself before heading toward the bathroom.

When you walked outside, Azriel didn’t look at you. “Lets get this over with, I have an engagement party to attend in a day.” Azriel began walking, never once glancing over his shoulder at you.

“Sorry Mr. Shadowsinger. Don’t let me impede on your happiness.” You snapped, his shoulders tensed. You slowed your steps, creating a decent distance between the two of you.

A small group of new young warriors waited for you and Azriel at one of the training rings. They stared at him in fear but threw hateful looks your way.

“How is she supposed to train us?” Guess the events of yesterday didn’t reach everyone’s ears.

“She is highly capable of training incompetent males like you.” Azriel snapped. “We are going to show you basic moves of how to fight with a dagger as well as defending against someone wielding one. Afterward, you will spar with one another until you get it perfect. I’m sure you all are capable of that.”

You swore the Cauldron was cursing you. Couldn’t it have been swords. Something that would keep Azriel at a further distance. You sighed loudly before preparing yourself.

The two of you took your stance. Pulling out your dagger, you charged first, swinging downward at him before cutting upwards, Azriel dodged each strike beautifully, and it only pissed you off. You advanced with more aggression, and with each move of your knife, you added a punch, he blocked each of them until his steps faltered slightly, and you twisted the knife in your hand, hitting him square in the nose with the hilt.

You smirked at him, but his face showed he was anything but thrilled. He advanced this time, leaving you to block his throws. He was throwing various combinations at you, and it was your turn to slip up. Apparently, he wasn’t holding back anymore either, because with the hit to your stomach you had let through had sent you flying, your back colliding with the mud. You inhaled sharply, groaning as the pain grew over your body.

You saw him run up to you, an apologetic look across his face. But you were determined to show that he could not beat you. So, you swept your legs against his, knocking him down. You slid across the mud over to him, sitting on his chest, pinning his arms down with your legs.

You held the dagger to his throat, the two of you covered in mud, breaths winded and lost. And as he tried to break free from your hold, you felt it. The one thing you dreaded wouldn’t happen.

The damn mating bond snapped within your chest. It felt so strong that you thought everyone around you felt it, too. It filled your body with a light that was unwelcome. It consumed you like a wildfire, suffocating the air from your lungs. In any other situation, this was your dream. All that you had ever wanted. But damn the mother. Why now. Why him.

“Fuck.” You cursed. It was all you could manage to get out, the only word that replayed in a loop within your mind and Azriel could only look at you with confusion.

You stumbled backward off of him, dropping the dagger into the mud. Azriel’s lips were moving, concern filling his gaze. But you couldn’t hear a thing. It was as if your head was stuck underwater. You blinked a few tears that threatened to fall away as Azriel reached for you, but you ran.

Far away from what the Cauldron damned upon you.

Taglist: @honestlywtfisgoingon @fanfictioniseverything @marina468 @positivewitch @maviee @blurredlamplight @bookslut420 @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @elle10 @dragonstoneprincess @holywolfsstuff @reiincarnatiion @valeridarkness @feiwelinchen @sv0430 @kennedy-brooke @emturtles @nightcourtwritings @zephyg-06 @chantalleke91 @katherinereid @shadowsingersmate24 @shadowsinger-654 @nobody00sthings @lucyysthings @turkishgirlslife @tcris2020

(Tumblr is being weird. It won't let me tag certain people .-.)

[twirlingsmilingwriting]

Can't you see the Starlight? || Finnick Odair X Reader

"Look at you worrying to much about things you can't change, you'll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way"

Getting dragged to a capital party to satisfy your mothers wishes could not have gone any better when you get asked to dance with the capital darling, Finnick Odair.

Warnings: Fluffy, mentions of death, kissing, dancing, fem! reader, alcohol mentioned, Finnick getting humbled A LOT

Word Count: 4.7K

A/N: I knowwwww I know yall have been asking for more Coriolanus Snow content but I needed some Finnick fluff in my life I love him so much. Might write more parts to this if yall like it :D

The music was so loud I swear I would be able to hear it ringing in my ears for the next days to come. Everyone was dressed to the nines and other girls scurried past me in large, sparkling, extravagant gowns shaped like cupcakes. Awkwardly, I stood there watching the people dance and talk.

This was my first time going to a capital party. My mother decided I spent enough time locked in my room and decided to drag me along to the party.

She had barged in that morning and said, "Y/N it is not normal for a girl your age to have no other friends other than her dog. You're in university. You should be in the club but instead your here. I'm sorry Sweetheart but that is just sad." I understood where she was coming from. It's not even that I don't like being outside, I love it actually. I love going on walks and watching the birds in the trees or even reading in the park and watching the leaves fall. All of that stuff is so much fun. The thing I don't like is the constant judgment from the other people in the capital. My family used to be incredibly wealthy, so much so my father had a hand in a big part of the economy of all of Panem. He was also deeply tied to political affairs in Panem, often having meetings with President Snow. My mother said they went to school together. But when my father died suddenly and mysteriously, our business had plummeted. My mother, bless her soul, tried to step up and handle things but our financial status had gone down significantly.

In all truth, we weren't doing well at all and the pretentious shallowness of the other capital citizens only viewed you as the numbers in your bank account. My mom could barely pay the tuition for the University I'm attending. I felt like an imposter at this party. I know these people think less of me and it's so uncomfortable. It's not even the stares, it's more the lack thereof. I wasn't perceived at all because the other people at this party didn't think I was worth their time. I played with the fabric of my silk red dress awkwardly while I watched my mom chatter with another woman her age at a table across from where I was. Sighing heavily, I closed my eyes and pretended to be anywhere else.

Suddenly, I was pulled out of my daze by a hand on my left shoulder and someone's breath on my right. I jumped and turned around, my gaze being met with the most marvelous pair of sea-green eyes. The man took a step back.

"I'm sorry, did I frighten you?" he chuckled.

I didn't respond, just gave him a confused, almost disgusted glace. He scoffed a little and let a smirk run across his face while extending his hand out.

"I'm delighted to make your acquaintance Ms..." He looked at me with curious eyes, wanting me to finish his sentence. Cautiously, I reached my hand out to meet his, never breaking eye contact.

"Y/N, Y/N L/N."

He shook my hand shortly and firmly. His smirk turned into a charming smile, exposing his charmingly crooked white teeth and dimples. I squinted my eyes at him, examining his face. I felt like I knew him from somewhere, he looked so familiar. His smile started to fade, I think he was a little offended by my glares.

"I'm sorry but do I know you from somewhere?"

A loud laugh left his mouth.

"I'd be more surprised if you didn't haha, do the Hunger Games ring a bell?"

"Gasp... Peeta Mellark?!"

Excitement started to rush through my veins. My eyes lit up and I started to get all giddy. I loved Katniss and Peeta's games. They just finished last week actually. It was really the only one I tuned into and actually paid attention to, I was too invested, enthralled even with their romance. God, I was such a sucker for romance. Peeta looks so different in real life. A lot taller actually. Blond as ever though.

"I- no... Finnick. Finnick Odair." He looked at me a little offended and confused. Now this was awkward. I calmed myself down and shook my head.

"Hmm, I can't say they do Mr. Odair." I glanced around and noticed the number of eyes that were on us, "Though from the amount of girls around here who look like they want to tear you apart, I'm going to assume you're famous or something."

"Ha, well I guess you can put it that way, what a way to humble someone Ms. Y/N... Anyways, I came to ask you a simple question, may I have this dance?" He bent at the waist slightly like a prince, his hand reached out for mine waiting for me to accept it, his stunningly green eyes never leaving mine. What a charmer. I laughed a little and looked around again. There was still a few eyes on us but just as many people were enjoying themselves. Something about the joy buzzing off of the other people just gave me this sudden urge to do something I was always taught not to do; let a stranger who just seemed to have the sharpest jawline, dimples, boosted ego, and the absolute deepest sea green eyes take me by the hand and lead me somewhere with even more strangers in a strange place. I'd say the stranger-danger aspect of it all was worrying but the pros of, "ooooo hot man" seemed to outweigh that.

"Well Mr. Odair, it's between that or sitting here for more painstakingly long minutes so I guess I'll dance with you," flirtatious sarcasm was dripping from my voice but I shot him back a smirk like the one he was giving me. I placed my hand into his and took mental note of how big and rough his hands were compared to mine. In one swift movement, he stood up straight again and interlocked his arm with mine.

"I'll make it worth your while," He joked and I rolled my eyes in response. For being an outdoor event, the area felt so claustrophobic with the amount of people around. The heat radiating off of everyone was unbearable, the aroma was sticky. Finnick held my arm close to him, afraid to lose me in the crowd. I could feel my face getting hot and I couldn't tell if I was flustered from the sudden male attention or if the heat was getting to me. Soon enough, we reached a small clearing, just big enough for the two of us and I felt Finnick let go of my arm and spin me around so now I was facing him. The way he was looking at me made me feel all warm and gooshy, ugh I hated it. With half-lidded eyes and that smirk that was starting to become oh so familiar, he placed one of his hands on the small of my back, pulling me close to him, and the other interlocking with my hand, extending them outwards.

I tried to pull every amount of falsified confidence out of the depths of my soul when I placed my other hand to meet his shoulder. In theory, this should've gone smoothly but I was so nervous my hand was shaking on the way up, none of my fake confidence could cover that one up. He started laughing and I cringed so hard. I looked down at the ground and my legs wobbled a little when I felt my posture start to slip in these heels. I wanted nothing more than to melt into a puddle of nothingness.

"Oh Ms. Y/N... you sure have a lot of bark for a girl who can't even stand up straight. My presence must be too intoxicating for you to handle."

"Ha. Ha. Ha. And you sure have a lot of confidence for a 'Famous' man I didn't even recognize."

"Ouch, dear let's hold off on that one, now please..." his hand lifted off the small of my back and I felt his fingers under my chin, lifting it to look at him.

"Look at me when I talk to you, it's rude not to"

His hand returned to my back and I stared at him flabbergasted. This man had such a hold on me, literally and figuratively, and I had just met him. This was crazy.

"Oh you're dangerous Mr. Odair," I whispered a little too loud for my liking. He heard it and started to laugh again. God that laugh was like the best sound I've ever heard.

"Trust me darling, I'm a daydream. Now, are we gonna start dancing or are you just going to sit here and stare at me while I get lost in your eyes."

Oh, this absolute weenie. Now I knew I was blushing. His facial expression was the embodiment of pride. It was like he was so accomplished in getting me so flustered. Suddenly, the reality of what was happening sank upon me and so did the remembrance that I didn't know how to dance. Smiling awkwardly at him I started to try and uncomfortably sway our bodies in an off-rhythm pace. His mouth formed an 'O' shape of realization like he just read my mind.

"Just follow my lead,"

He started to move his feet and I followed along one step behind him. I was fumbling over my self a lot but he whispered little encouragements into my ear over the party music. Soon enough, I was working in perfect rhythm alongside him and things started to get a little more fun.

"Look at you, good girl. You caught on so fast,"

Oh god, how can someone be so charming? His presence was almost intoxicating. I turned my head again to avoid eye contact. If I stared into those green eyes for a moment longer I would surely fall into the depths of them and never be able to get out.

"Don't get shy now, darling. Come on," he teased before pulling me closer. My chest was pressed up against him and my eyes widened. Looking up at him slowly, I simply hit him with a shining smile. "Who me? Shy? Never, I'm clearly the most outgoing and social girl out there, that's exactly why I was standing at that table by myself for so long," I joked sarcastically and he rolled his eyes. The song changed and blasted through the speaker and played yet another slow dance song. I groaned and his ears perked up. He swooped in to take that as an oppertunity to ask,

"Are you bored yet?"

"Do you want the honest answer or the delusional one?"

"I'd rather us start our relationship with honesty so I'll go with the first option."

I swear, did this man ever stop smiling?

"Relationship? You're talking crazy Mr. Odair... but to be honest, I'm a little bored... Just a little."

He chuckled a little and continued to lead our bodies elegantly across the dance floor.

"How about we get out of here after this song? There's a lake a short walk down from here, we can go watch the stars."

"Oh Mr. Odair, you better not be trying to murder me... it's okay you don't have to drop everything for me. Clearly, you're enjoying the party."

"Don't worry... You can trust me and it's less that I'm enjoying the party and more that I'm enjoying you"

"You tease~"

"And without giving away too many details... You'd be doing me a favor getting me out of here," he spoke with a changed demeanor, a slightly grim and sad one at that. I brushed it off and nodded.

"So it's a deal?"

"Deal."

He smiled and then pulled away from me, lifting my hand. I understood the assignment and did a little spin, feeling my dress float a little around me. I giggled and spun back into his arms. While my dancing was still quite stiff, I felt so happy. He pulled me close and we helplessly gazed into each others eyes. The song ended and the music dwindled and he pulled away, smiling uncontrollably.

"Stop looking at me like that~ you're giving me the creeps," I teased and giggled, playfully hitting his slightly exposed chest from the V-neck of his white flowy top. He threw his head back laughing before extending his hand out to me again for the second time that night.

"Creeps? I'm sure you mean "Oh Finnick, stop killing me with that beautifully charming, elegant, and stunning smile"'

I huffed and rolled my eyes.

"Are we heading out now?"

"After you."

Words just seemed to roll right off his tongue like honey dripping off a warm spoon, shockingly sweet and smooth. His eyes never left mine. Ever. His hand reached for mine once more and we interlocked fingers while I started to try and find a path off the dance floor. Once we were free from the sweaty dance floor, I turned to Finnick with wide eyes ready for him to lead us down this 'short walk to the lake'. He gladly accepted this task and we walked out the gates of the capital party, not caring if anyone saw us.

As soon as we stepped out of the area I paused for a moment to take a deep breath in. "Oh man I swear it is so hard to breathe in there"

"Oh absolutely. Especially over the heavy perfumes that smell so strong yet can't cover the smell of B.O." Finnick laughed.

"Eww when you put it like that it makes it seem so much worse"

"Oh, but it is that bad let's just be honest here. Like I said earlier, I want this relationship to be started on a foundation of honesty, though, I do love a good secret."

I scrunched my face at his comment and laughed, interlocking my fingers with his again as we looked up ahead of the night in front of us.

"The lake is right down that way," he pointed off to the distance to where we were met with a little stone and dirt path leading. Logically thinking, now was really the time I should be using stranger danger logic. Good thing I wasn't thinking. I grabbed onto Finnick's arm and he started to walk me down the moonlit path. The misty coolness of the nighttime felt so nice on my skin while I cooled off from the party but the warmth of Finnick's arm against my body felt even better. The sound of the music from the party started to get fainter and fainter in the distance.

"So Mr. Odair,"

"Please, just call me Finnick, we aren't around all those fancy people anymore. We can drop the formalities."

"Hmm okay Finnick," I liked the way his name rolled off my tongue and from the way Finnick was grinning and the path in front of us, I think he liked it too. "Where are you from?"

"Wow... you really don't know anything about me huh?" He asked, genuinely so shocked.

"Oh I'm sorry famous-capital-man. How dare I not know how lucky I am to bask in your glory," I rolled my eyes at him.

"Ah that's- that's not what I mean... It's refreshing in a way. It's like with you my reputation doesn't precede me." His tone was open. Honest. He spoke slowly in his last words as if he was searching deep within that beautiful brain of his to pick the right words to say. I didn't respond. On one hand, I was very flattered to see him be so honest. On the other, that sentence was setting off a few more red flags in my mind. What could his reputation be that he finds it enlightening that I don't know who he is? Either way, I brushed off that idea. Finnick seemed like an honest man.

Now that we were alone with just the two of us it felt like his whole demeanor had changed. Inside the gates of the capital party, it felt like he was masking himself a little. It was like he was playing a character, a charming playboy who only had one goal but here, he was still charming but in a different way. His presence reminded me of sitting on the warm sand of a beach watching as the ocean waves crashed into the shore. It draws you in, gives you warmth, and is stunning to look at. I hadn't realized that I had been standing there in silence, lost in my own thoughts, for longer than was comfortable until he continued.

"I'm actually from District 4," He said with a soft smile, a little different from the smirk that usually rested on his face but a lot cuter.

"Really? District 4... So do you like fishing?" Dumb question. I felt the instant cringe rattle my bones after I let those words out. He didn't make a big deal out of it at all though. He laughed a little, "Yeah actually, I don't get around to doing it anymore but I was very good at fishing when I was younger. I'm quite talented with a net."

I feel like there's a joke I'm missing here. I didn't have much more time to psychoanalyze the man because soon enough, we made it to the lake. The moonlight reflected down upon the lake allowing for the beautiful ripples of the water to be seen. The moonlight also shined down on us, being the only source of light in the darkness of this twilight hour. I took a moment to bask in its tranquil beauty as I watched the fireflies dance through the tall grass like little stars that had just dropped down to earth.

"Here it is..." the words left his lips softly and I could feel his eyes staring at my face, trying to read my expression but I was too busy being astonished by the beauty of nature.

"I have lived here my whole life and I have never even heard of or seen this place before..."

He took my hand and led me down to a little clearing in the grass, right above the shore of the lake where we sat down and continued to look around. His head hung down and he looked at his lap, laughing a little before saying, "You must not get out much, huh? Why? I mean, you must have money, why don't you leave and have fun more often?"

"Eh it's not as simple as that, I just... I really can't stand the environment or the attitudes of the people in the capital. They can always find a way to dehumanize another person. After my father passed, my family lost a significant amount of our income and we practically became invisible to the others in the capital. When other people treat you as lesser than or inhuman and like they can do whatever they want to you it's disheartening. The shallowness of other people gets to me too. How am I ever supposed to make friends if they don't care to get to know me? My family just keeps getting hit with trouble after trouble I'm just... I don't know."

I felt a little pathetic rambling on to Finnick. I'm sure he wasn't ready for that kind of trauma dump. My fingers tangled with the hem of my dress and I looked down, examining how my nail polish had chipped at some point during the night. Finnick was silent for a moment. I started to feel even more embarrassed. I didn't need to give him that much information. I was about to open my mouth again to talk about something else but he beat me to it.

"Y/N... Honestly, I understand that on so many levels. Especially as a person who isn't from here but always has to be here for business, I understand fully what you mean but, not everyone is like that and in a way, you're sort of doing the same thing if you're generalizing other capital people like that too... Not to say that you're at fault or anything though but... think about it this way. The way they act is because they were raised that way, truly if you hadn't gone through what you went through you would end up the same way they are,"

His words made me flinch. The idea of being just as shallow as them scared me, deeply. He looked at me, laughed a little, and continued.

"I know I know... This is kind of a hard thing to say, I mean, it's easier to say than to do but, every barrier we cross is another lesson learned. The things we go through turn us into the people we are today and it's our job as people to be people, good people. There is a lot of bad in this world, the least we can do is try to make light with the small things we do. If you spend your whole life worrying too much about the things you can't change, you'll spend your life too stuck in the past and miserable. I was dealt a pretty shitty hand in life but I'm trying to make the best of what I was given and hey, my shitty ass circumstances led me here, with you right now and that seems pretty cool to me"

My heart skipped a beat and I moved my head up to look at Finnick. He was now laying on his back staring up at the sky, head turning to make eye contact with me. I swear this man had a way of reading just the deepest parts of my soul. Deep green eyes met my own and I saw a glimmer, a shine in his eyes that hadn't been there before. A warm smile tugged at the corners of my lips and we sat in silence for a moment, just staring deep into each other's eyes.

"I'd have to agree with you on that one Finnick..." I whispered. He chuckled then turned back to look at the sky.

"Y/N... come join me, the stars are beautiful tonight," He said and patted the ground next to him, ushering me closer. I followed and lay right beside him looking up at the twinkling stars. Normally you can never see the stars so clearly in the capital because of the amount of air and light pollution was so dense but right now, they were shining bright. Maybe things just looked brighter with Finnick next to me. I looked back at Finnick's face, he seemed lost in thought, staring up at the stars.

"Don't you see the starlight? Isn't it crazy to think about how something so far can still be seen be seen by us here? They shine so brightly so that they can bring joy to the rest of the universe. I want to make a change in the world that significant one day. Do something so great that it will bring great joy to everyone for years to come... like even when I die I will be happy knowing there will be happiness after me because of me... I don't know maybe I'm just unrealistically daydreaming right now," Finnick rambled on so confidently but pulled back on that last line. I turned onto my side to look at him, hand coming to stroke the side of his face.

"I- I think you can do it... you're meant for something greater than this Finnick I can feel it..." earnestly, I spoke. While I had just met the man I could just feel this energy radiating off of him. "Sorry if this is sort of sudden but, you have such a pull to you Finnick... You seem to make everything feel like magic when I'm around you. I'm so enchanted by the life you bring to the room and it's actually insane to me. I have been having a great time tonight and I know I wouldn't have had the tiniest bit of enjoyment if I didn't get to meet you tonight. Finnick, you shine brighter than the whole sky and I'm sure you'll make the whole world feel your warmth too."

Finnick didn't speak, maybe I word vomited a little there but I meant every word I said. I swear I could see tears welling up in his troubled eyes before he closed them hard and started to speak. "Truly... those are the kindest words anyone has ever said to me y/n. You don't have any idea how much your sincerity means to me. Thank you" He propped himself up on his elbow to turn to me too. I can't describe what took over me when he finally opened his eyes again. With piercing green eyes and just the hint of a smile on his handsome face, I subconsciously started to lean forward and to my surprise, he was mirroring my actions. It happened so fast, his warm lips were on mine and his free hand found its way to my cheek. The moment was magical, our lips moving in a rhythmic pattern. He pulled away slowly and looked deeply into my eyes while we took a moment to catch our breaths.

"Finnick..."

"Yeah?"

"I think I like you... a lot." My face grew more red with embarrassment while my eyes searched his face for a response. He smiled at me, lips slightly parted before he leaned back in, kissing me a little harsher, lips burning with passion. He lightly placed me on to my back and we continued to share this moment of innocent intimacy while he hovered over me. My fingers tangled in his soft, blond hair and his weight pressed against my body, one of his hands on my face, keeping me close to him, and the other propping himself up. I knew I had to stop myself before this went too far but I really didn't want to. I wanted this night, this moment, to go on forever. Unfortunately, that decision was made for me when he pulled away and looked down on me. The gold shark tooth necklace he was wearing dangled down in front of my face. He smiled again at me. "We should head back to the party now before it gets too late... It'll be more fun I promise," he leaned down to kiss my forehead then came back up, "They play faster-paced music at the end of the night because that's when all the old people go home. You know they might have a heart attack once the bass kicks in," We shared a laugh and he leaned closer to me again, he nuzzled his face into the nook of my neck and placed a soft kiss on my collarbone that sent shivers down my spine. Goosebumps pricked at my skin and his breath tickled as it brushed against my my ear before he whispered, "I like you too y/n... a lot."

I was a blushing mess at this point. He kissed my cheek before sitting back up. He hit me with that charming smile and I pathetically tried to cover my face with my hands but he grabbed my wrists and stopped me.

"No no none of that, I like seeing how flustered you are it's kind of funny."

"Oh boo you asshole," I joked, sitting up and playfully punching his arm. He laughed hard and stood up to his feet, extending his hand out to help me up. Taking his offer, he helped me onto my feet.

With arms linked, we walked away from the lakeside shore and back to the capital party. My eyes searched the room to see if my mom had noticed I left and from the looks of the third empty glass of liquor on the table she was at and the way her eyes were lit up while she continued to chat with the other women her age, she didn't notice a thing. Finnick's hand squeezed mine tightly and gave me a reassuring smile and we walked back onto the dance floor.

By the end of the night, I couldn't tell if it was the intoxicating spirit of Finnick or the amount of times I had spun around the dance floor but I was so dizzy. I could barely think straight but there was only one thing on my mind.

When could I see him again?

[yanderemommabean]

I love doctor Lee so much. Half of my brain is like 'haha he's so cute, he has a snake called Gilbert that's adorable'. The other half of my brain says:

'what if you were a patient at the hospital's mental ward, and Dr Lee was assigned to your case? He's generally caring and sweet, checking in on you every day to make sure you're alright.'

What if Lee comes in, asking you about side effects of the new medication that you're trying, but the line of inquiry soon grows uncomfortably invasive. Have you been feeling happier? Have you experienced a decrease in libido? How frequently do you think of masturbating? Do you think of anyone? Do you think of him?

Lee's a bit too friendly, actually. He examines you in ways that aren't strictly necessary, asking for you to disrobe so that he can check to see if you've injured yourself. The nurses would ignore you if you told them about what Lee does. He's already warned the staff that you're not the most trustworthy. Nobody would believe you. You're his lovely little patient, and he hopes that one day you'll accept it.

“I-I want to change doctors…I have a right to do that don’t I?!” you asked in a hushed, panicked voice. The nurse sitting before you sighs in annoyance, and while you don’t blame her, you’re also hurt because to her you’re just another patient causing problems.

“Dr.Lee has already notified us about why you’d want to change. You’re so lucky he hasn’t fired you as his own patient! You trying to get those drugs from other doctors could put you in jail you know? Lee is trying to actually help you”

You grit your teeth in frustration, trying not to lash out and shake the woman to get her to pay attention. You’re clearly not a fucking drug addict, or some psycho patient to just ignore. “No! No listen to me! Please!”

“Ah, I see our little butterfly is awake and eager today!” a deep, amused voice purrs from behind you. “Mrs. Williams, Ill take it from here. Go on, take an early break! It’s almost the holidays, you could use a bit longer to relax after working such a hard shift for me”.

Your face drains of color as the nurse happily leaves, thanking him as she walks away with a pep in her step. You shiver as he nuzzles into your shoulder and inhales deeply, murmuring something about how he loves the scent of your hair.

“You know, you trying so hard to escape me…It should make me mad” he sighs deeply, as if trying to keep himself calm. His hands wander down to clasp yours, pulling your knuckles up to his lips as he kisses them. “It should make me want to kill…but you have this way of being adorable even when panicked and upset”.

“You’re a sick fucker if you get off on me being terrified of you!” you hissed, trying to pull away, only to be yanked right up to his chest, face forced to look up at him as he grabs your chin. “Oh no no, dear butterfly, I don’t think you’re sexually appealing when scared. I think you’re adorable when scared of me. I get protective of you when you’re scared”

He forces you to press closer as he noses up the column of your neck, kissing right behind your earlobe “What makes my cock rock hard is knowing you can’t escape me, and that every night I get to indulge in you and your body…even if you insist that you hate me”.

You brokenly sob as his teeth begin to tease your skin, not hard enough to leave a mark but enough to make your body betray you. “I feel those shivers” he states with a smirk, turning you to face the wall as he presses right against your back “I feel the way your body craves me, butterfly. Why must you always deny it? If you would just let me love you, this wouldn’t be so hard anymore”.

His hands cup your crotch, fingers pressing down firmly to massage and grope you, making your thighs tighten and shake as your breath quickens. “I-I hate you. I hate you!” you scream, but your voice soon becomes breathy and shaky while his hands slip into your underwear with ease. “Say that all you wish darling, I'm a professional. I know when my patient is lying to themself”

(Hiya! Sorry if this isn't up to par, I'm still recovering and work is kicking my ass mentally lol, but I love these types of scenarios! I hope you enjoyed! -Mommabean)

[avalil18]

I love you, I promise (pt2)

Summary:you decide to hang out with your childhood best friend after he had surgery but little did you know what would happen.

————————-

I fell asleep in joes arms last night and I don’t think I’ve ever had a better sleep in my life! Joe is like my comfort blanket. He is there when I’m sad, angry, happy, and all the above. He is my best friend. But I over heard something last night that I can’t get out of my head. “And Joe take good care of her like I know you will. I know you love her and to afraid to ruin your friendship but I see the way she looks at you and you should tell her, don’t be scared.” Robin said. Joe loves me! And not in a best friend way. I don’t know what to think. I have always had feelings towards him but I could never say anything because of possibly ruining our friendship.

The sun was shining in joes room as I woke up in his big comfortable arms. I was laying my head in his chest with my hand on his stomach and a big, white, soft throw blanket over us. After just laying in joes arms for a while he woke up. I started drawing shapes on his abdomen as he was waking up.

“Good morning”-joe

“Good morning j”-you

“How did you sleep?”-joe

Great! You?”-you

“Amazing! I don’t think I’ve gotten a good night sleep in a while.”-joe

“Good!”-you

Joe started moving his fingers all over my back. Drawing shapes like I was on his stomach. It gave me butterflies all around. I didn’t want to get up, just wanted to stay in his embrace forever.

“Are your parents still here?”-you

“I don’t think so. I heard the door close early this morning. They are probably driving back. I think since they know that you are over that you can probably help me around the house.”-joe

“Haha, probably!”-you

“What time is it?”-you

Joe moved his arm with the other hand on my back. He picked up his phone.

“8:30”-Joe

“Ok.”-you

I looked up at him. As he moved back from putting his phone back he looked at me and we locked eyes. After a few seconds I said something trying not to stare for to long

“We should get up.”-you

“Oh, uh yeah.”-joe

I moved out of his embrace and planted my feet onto the carpet and walked into the bathroom. I keep some stuff here since I come over all the time. I have my own little drawer. I got my toothbrush and brushed my teeth. Once I was done with that I brushed my hair and went out into the closet. I also have a drawer in there. I picked out my OSU sweatpants and my Lululemon align sports bra. Joe walked in just as I was walking out.

“Hey! If you don’t mind, do you think you can help me put my pants on?”-joe

I laughed

“Sure!”-you

He walked to his side and also picked out some OSU sweatpants and a tied died green shirt that almost looked like stained bleach. Oh this boy and his clothes I thought.

“I just need you to balance and help me take off the brace.”-joe

“Ok! I can do that!”-you

I walked over to him and bended down to take off his brace. He sleeps with a brace sometimes but usually puts a cast on. I unwrapped the Velcro and slipped the brace off and put it on the tiny island in the middle of his big closet.

“Here put your arm on me and I will open the pants. Got it, burrow?”-you

“Yes ma’am!”joe

“Haha, good!”-you

He put his arm on my shoulder and I opened the pant waist. He was in his boxers and the green shirt. He slipped one of his legs then the other. He pulled them up. I looked at him and smiled and Joe gave an even bigger smile back.

“Great teamwork!”-you

I said giving him a high five.

“Teamwork makes the dream work!”-joe

We laughed and made our way out the closet and down the stairs to the kitchen. I helped Joe down the stairs hand in hand. I helped him sit down on one of the kitchen stools and then decided to make breakfast.

“What do you want to eat?”-you

“Um, how about some eggs and bacon?”-joe

“Sounds good to me!”-you

I turned on the stove and got to cracking the eggs. As I was doing so I could feel joes ocean eyes on me. It made me blush but I had to focus on making a good breakfast.

“So, are you staying with me today?”-joe

I turned around to look at him.

“Um, I think so! I have to help you around the house and help you clean. This place is a mess!”-you

“Yeah, it definitely needs cleaning! But im happy I get to spend time with you.”-joe

My cheeks got rosy red

“Haha! Well I’m happy to spend time with you too!”-you

I winked and turned around to place the eggs and bacon on the plates.

“Here you go!”-you

“Damm y/n, this looks amazing!”-joe

“Joe, it’s just eggs and bacon.” - you laughed

“Yeah! But you put stuff in your food that makes it taste good!”-joe

“You mean seasoning?”-you

“Yeah! That’s it!”-joe

We laughed

“I can tell you cook!”-you say sarcastically

“Hey! I’m actually a very good cook!”-joe

“Sure, if you say so burrow.”-you

He smirked at me and I smiled back which made us both laugh. I loved being in joes company. He makes me feel safe and loved.

After breakfast I got to cleaning the dishes as Joe sat on the couch watching ESPN. I looked over at him as I loaded the dishwasher. God is he perfect. Once done with that I decided to clean the counters and the dinner table. The dinner table was filled with get well cards and Bengals playbooks. I moved those and got to spraying then wiping down the glass table.

After a few hours of wiping down surfaces, putting stuff in the washer and dryer, and changing sheets it was finally time to wind down. Joe was still in the same spot on the couch. He didn’t really move around a lot. Only when we got sushi for lunch and ate at the table and going to his office downstairs in his big basement.

“Hey you!”-joe

“Hi!”-you

I sat next to him and Joe put the throw blanket around my legs as he was watching UFC.

“Thanks for helping me out today. I really appreciate it y/n.”-joe

We turned to each other starring into each others eyes

“Of course Joe! I’m always here to help you!”-you

He smiled.

“I have something to show you!”-joe

“Really! What is it?”-you

“Well help me up and I will show you!”-joe

I laughed forgetting that he needs help. I got up and put my hands out. Joe put his hands in mine and slowly got up. When we got up and started walking out into his backyard through the sliding door we kept our hands locked in. My heart was racing. I don’t know what he wanted to show me.

As we got outside and starred into the dark sky joe looked up into space.

“Do you remember when we would go to our spot on that hill and look into the sky once every year?”-joe

“Yeah! When Jupiter and Venus collide!”-you

“Yeah exactly! Well this year they are closer together than like ever before!”-joe

“Really! That’s awesome! And of course you know that! You really are a physics nerd!”-you

He smirked down at me

“What! It’s true!”-you

I smiled back at him. He then took my hand and pointed at Jupiter and Venus.

“That’s them!”-joe

“Wow!”-you

I was mesmerized! Joe always made me look into the night sky with him and look at stars all through out our childhood.

As I was looking up Joe looked at me. I was still very captivated by the planets that I didn’t look back. Right there and then he put his hand on my cheek and turned my head and kissed me. I was shocked! Joe kissed me! I felt his hands move up my waist and to my back. I moved my arms to his neck and my fingers were In his hair. We were probably kissing for about 30 seconds before we pulled back.

“God you don’t know how long I’ve been meaning to do that y/n.”-joe

I looked up at him with so much love in my eyes

“You’re my world y/n. Mostly everything that has made me, me was you. You have been my best friend ever since second grade. You were wearing your pink dress with a white bow in your hair and playing in your front yard. I came over to you and asked if I can play with you and of course you happily said yes. Ever since then I have been in love with you. I know it took me a long time to say it but there it is. I love you y/n, always have and always will.”

I was speechless but then I finally spoke

“God Joe, I don’t know what to say. But to tell you the truth I have always loved you too. Ever since you came up to be in those long cargo shorts and red shirt with a basket ball in your hand and asked if you can play with me. I also heard your mom last night when she came to say good night. She said that you have always loved me. I also heard was you said after.”-you

“You.. you did?”-joe

“Yeah, and Joe you are my best friend who I always have loved and cared about. You make me feel loved and safe. I love you too Joe burrow, always have and always will.”-you

Joe pulled me in for a kiss. This time more passionate and aggressive. We probably made out for five minutes.

“Will you be my Jupiter to my Venus?”-joe

“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend, Joey?”-you

“Maybe…”-joe

“Well then I will of course be your Venus!”-you laughed

The night slipped away as you fell asleep in joes arms again with so much love filling up both of your body’s and souls.

——————

Authors note: I decided that Joe should end up telling y/n how he feels so here ya go! And ik y’all loved the first one. 🩷

Tagged: @sunny1616

[cherrybeartoast]

skz incorrects (but they're things my friends have actually said)

friends version since i found our quote books!! tagging @hannahhbahng bc their reaction was the cutest <3

chris: he's actually a really nice guy once you get to know him

jeongin: do really nice guys bash people

seungmin: you just like dry coughed in my ear

jisung: no it was actually wet i just drank water

felix: its like…they're a human and gay. and youre also human but youre not gay

changbin: yes…wait what were we talking about?

felix: dangerous goods and hazardous substances, of course

minho: my friend just texted me "sorry i'm going to jail i robbed someone"

jisung: haha

minho:

jisung: ha

minho:

felix: they KILLED 250 DOGS

jeongin: WHO

felix: the MONKEYS

hyunjin: IT'S YOUR SPIRIT ANIMAL

changbin: IT'S A FISH, WITH TEETH AND A THUMBS UP

jeongin: oh, you kicked me? i didn't feel i-NO SEUNGMIN DON'T FUCKING

[concerningwolves]

Hey! Do you have any tips for breaking writers block when you're adhd and/or autistic? Be it your own tips or a link to another post? My friend and I need help haha

Ahh sorry you got buried under spam and old ask game asks. (I... really need to sort my ask box >.<' ). But here we go, a month late, and hopefully better late than never:

Quick ideas for beating writer's block when autistic and/or ADHD

I've got this old post I wrote on writer's block and focus troubles. Ironically, this was before my autism diagnosis but the tips still happen to be things I, an autistic person, did to manage writing when faced with executive dysfunction (except I didn't know what executive dysfunction was at that point lol). I'm linking this with one important caveat, though: if you have ADHD, "stepping away" might do more harm than good; struggling to start tasks is a Big Thing with ADHD, so not starting the task at all is entirely counterproductive. (Unless you're in burnout! Here's a post about the differences between block and burnout with some ideas on what to do for each, in case that's at all helpful to you).

And here's something yoinked from another old ask-answer:

sometimes a break from more “serious” writing is what you need. Maybe try and take the characters from your main project and drop them somewhere else for the hell of it. I like to throw my characters into the MCU without warning like “lmao have fun in a strange modern world where there are gods and a guy in an iron flying suit bye.” Or, if fandom cross-overs aren’t your thing, find a writing prompt or take an idea you like and use it to form a short story with your characters instead.

Some other ideas I've seen around for writer's block with ADHD/Autism are:

Try voice recording or text to speech (i.e., absolute stream-of-consciousness unfiltered brain-to-mouth, giving yourself permission to 100% bullshit if you like, and see what rattles loose in the brain box)

Stream of consciousness writing in general, not even necessarily about a particular prompt or particular project. This one can be done in combination with:

Writing sprints! One minute timers, two minute timers, five minutes – set it for as long as you want, but when you're fighting executive dysfunction and/or difficulty focusing, the burst of urgency that comes from a shorter timer is very helpful.

And speaking of the sense of urgency: gamify your writing! There are different ways to do this, with varying elements of risk. I'll link some ways to do this at the end under "resources".

Exercise. I don't necessarily mean hitting the gym, but a quick burst of exercise prior to writing to get the heart rate up can help wake your brain up a bit. (Or, if you find repetitive exercise mind-numbingly boring like I do, the writing sure does start to look appealing lol).

Meditation. Okay, this one is sort of 🤔 for me, because I do often hear from fellow autistics and our ADHD cousins that meditation is literally impossible for us. It is for me. But! Like with exercise above, if meditation bores you instead of helping relax and ""clear your mind"", you can probably use that boredom to your advantage. Or, it might work as intended.

Change your workspace/situation/routine. Sometimes the problem is that you need new sensory input, or that your brain has gotten thoroughly bored and decided not to tell you. Use a different chair. Move to the kitchen table. Write at a different time of day. Have a different snack (or try having a snack while writing...). Basically, look at what you're currently trying, and see how you can do it differently.

It's also really good practise to get comfortable with Being Bad At Writing. Perfectionism and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria are the biggest, meanest brain weasels with the sharpest teeth. Don't let them bully you. It sucks. It takes a lot of time and effort and internal work, which is why I was loathe to include this on a post of quick solutions, but. It is important.

And getting comfortable with this doesn't necessarily mean learning how to accept critique, or accepting that sometimes you'll write things that suck. It means accepting that sometimes you won't handle critique or feedback well, and also accepting that you won't always manage to beat the writer's block or be productive. Sometimes you have to make peace with the fact that you're going to feel horrible, feel your feelings, and try to remind yourself on the other side that none of it means you're a talentless hack.

Resources

Anything with a 🪙 next to it is paid only (I've tried to limit these and find alternatives).

The resources are split into things that "gameify" writing (i.e., hack your dopamine/serotonin in ways that reaaaaallly help autistic and ADHD folks), writing programs that are designed to help you focus, writing programs that track your habits and appeal to the "ohhhh numbers going up" brain, focus-aiding apps, and some miscellaneous stuff. Under the cut to save your dashes.

"Gamifying" your writing:

The Most Dangerous Writing App – You can't stop typing before your set timer runs out, or you risk losing your work. Excellent for warming up, stream-of-consciousness, or if you're feeling reckless, working on your actual project. I did a lot of the second draft of When Dealing with Wolves on this thing (it was terrifying yet highly effective).

Written? Kitten! – Get rewarded for meeting your set writing wordcount with kitten pictures. Haven't used this one personally, but heard wonderful things about it.

4TheWords 🪙 – This one gamifies writing in the most literal sense. As in, it's an online game where you defeat monsters, explore and level up by writing words. I did the free trial a couple years back, and I've heard there are a lot of different ways you can lower the subscription cost. The only reason I haven't gone back to it is because I feel like I can't justify spending money on it when I'm doing fine with Scrivener and free resources, but maybe one day I will purely for the fun factor...

StimuWrite – similar idea to Written Kitten; the app provides visual/audio stimulation while you write, which is great for many ADHD-ers and autistics. There's a progress bar, soundscape options, typing effects and emoji reactions as rewards, among other features.

Write or Die – This is The Most Dangerous Writing App meets Written Kitten. As far as I can figure out, the basic web version is free to use; you can set the parameters like how how long you want to write for, how many words to reach, and whether you want rewards for meeting goals or punishments for failing to meet them. There's also a stimulus mode, where the nice auditory stimulus goes away if you stop writing.

Minimalist/Focus writing programs:

Focus Writer [Windows] – thoroughly stripped-down minimalist word processor. As far as I know, it has basic functions like find-replace, but mostly it's designed only for writing. Not for formatting, spellchecking or editing.

iA Writer 🪙 [iOS] – Similar to Focus Writer, it's designed to fill your screen with a simple workspace. Allows you to use markdown formatting, and has a feature called Focus Mode that blurs out everything except the sentence you're typing. (If I could find a Windows-friendly alternative to this with that same feature I would be so happy). A cheaper alternative is 1Writer, but that doesn't have the focus mode.

Typewrite Something – Absolutely bare minimum web-based typewriter simulator. Basically just a blank screen that you start typing on, and the words appear in a typewriter font. Great for stream-of-consciousness without the risk level of TMDWA because you can't backspace. If you don't like the clacky sound, turn off your volume.

Focus Apps

Cold Turkey – Block applications and websites on your laptop/computer for a specified period of time. You can even block the entire internet.

Forest – Similar to Cold Turkey in that it stops you from seeking distractions or getting distracted. Set a timer and the app starts growing a tree. If you leave the app, the tree dies. Once you have a tree, you add it to your forest.

Habit-building writing programs:

Novlr – Simple, minimal layout, and tracks your writing goals per month and day, and your daily streak. There are more features in the plus and pro versions, and you can only have five projects in the free version, but otherwise it looks like a good free alternative to the next two programs:

750 Words 🪙 – Made for free writing, but also very useful for drafting. I had it for a month or so a while back on the free trial. It tracks writing streaks and gives you fun graphs and statistics at the end of each session, including number of distractions, actual typing time vs total time and average words per minute. Also, it analyses the mood of what you wrote, which I always found delightful.

Writing Analytics 🪙 – If writing streaks, badges and analytical graphs get your dopamine going, then I really recommend this one. The writing screen itself is very minimalistic, but it still shows your writing speed (I loved watching that go up) and your goal progress. In terms of analytics, it tracks a LOT of different things, including time spent writing vs revising, average wordcounts per day/month/year, and words written vs words deleted. I used this for about a year before I switched to Scrivener, and the switch was purely because I needed something that wasn't subscription-based. (Apparently since I stopped using it there's also a new feature that lets you create private writing rooms and see other writer's progress).

Misc.

WriteTrack – Not a word processor, but it has very good tools for tracking and planning your writing. Again, if graphs going up helps your brain, this is excellent, but you can't see it in real time.

10 ADHD-friendly brain tricks for writers – what it says on the tin: ten tips for writers with ADHD; I'm particularly fond of "Put away one knife", which breaks the nebulous task of "start writing" into something really simple like just... pull out your desk chair.

[birdstooth]

This is a really silly doodle that fits in with what is now an ongoing saga I guess 🤷‍♀️

(1) phantom obedience training, (2) positive reinforcement

EDIT: omg I forgot I wasn’t supposed to post this until the POLL finished 😭😭😭

far too many NOTES below the cut 🎶

As part of his ongoing efforts to be“good” Erik is learning doing his income taxes this year!

(Like he definitely 100% does every year! Multiple times even, just for fun!! And bc he is very extremely skilled!!!)

idk if they had income tax at that time tbh… but I feel like it would come up if Christine encouraged him go legit and negotiate a salary with the opera managers haha

Also Erik would prob be really excited about it, like “omg we are doing our income taxes together, like a HUSBAND and WIFE would!! 😍😍😍”

In my mind he gets unreasonably giddy imagining all the domestic activities that “normal spouses” might do together eg:

“we are brushing our teeth at the same sink, like a HUSBAND and WIFE!”

“She is tidying the inside of the lair house like a WIFE, while I am outside lighting the 300 candles that float on the lake like a HUSBAND!”

“My WIFE is making dinner while I do the HUSBAND task of drowning intruders feeding the siren!”