#but at least gerard looks good

[boydevision]

I'm Not Okay (I Promise) - Los Angeles, CA 10.11.22

[awakeanytime]

Can I just say that I have never had more fun than when I have just fully made shit up about the danger days universe. If they won’t give me more then god fucking damn it I’ll do it myself

[diningwiththeasquiths]

Holt McCallany in Greenland (2020)

[x-ladydisdain-x]

I wonder how many people converted to Christianity/Catholicism because of unholyverse

[swarmfly]

Me watching LOTMS: Look at this fucking nerd in their 20s with their little book labeled Star Wars notes, sleeping with a Star Wars blanket lmfao.

Also me: constantly switching between my 3 different colour coded Star Wars Notes pages on google docs after watching another hour long lore video with my little C3-PO stuffy propped up beside me for moral support.

[jiishwa]

mcr was amazing last night. like 13 year old me wouldn’t believe it.

[brltpop]

😔👇

[merobot]

I will give gerard way a pass to be a little corporate. Nobody else tho

[stuckyeatscake]

sometimes i wish gerard way hadnt made me emo, but then I’d be boring and wouldn’t have shown up to a presentation w a bunch of local ceos in a cartoon shirt and three cheers for sweet revenge makeup

[chompe-diem]

man i'm really due for a blog theme change

[justaholeinmysoul]

Sometimes I read stuff on here and I wanna murder people then I remember some other people left and now they're married and doctors and outside thriving and if you'll tell them about destiel or how wrong is to say latino they'd be like ????!!!??? and I'm like....ok none of this matters i pass

[ziggyzolch]

Queen Bee-atch Ⅰ (Regina George x Reader)

Summary: You, a self-proclaimed loser, are going into Junior year with one goal in mind: Avoid Regina George. Nobody notices you, so it shouldn't be too hard…right?

✮✮✮

Light seeps through the blinds and birds start to make themselves known with their melodic chirps. Aggressive rustling can be heard from outside your door as you throw a mini tantrum on your, now ruffled up, sheets. Sleepless nights weren't new to you, but they don't get any less frustrating. You stare at the ceiling for a good 30 seconds before finally pushing yourself off your bed. Walking to turn off the air conditioning, you trip over god-knows what and fall flat on your face. The first day of junior year and you're already contemplating ending it all, on the floor of your dump of a bedroom, laying next to a-

"My mascara!", you exclaimed as you sat up. You lost that thing ages ago. You get up, taking the mascara with you and make your way into the bathroom. Becoming a junior wasn't anything you cared for. After sophomore year, the illusion of high school you created in your head had melted away, leaving behind a hollow teenage girl that just wanted to get it over and done with.

Putting away your mascara, you catch a glimpse of yourself in your mirror. A bed-head ridden girl with deep eye bags, which only seem to become more obvious with each passing day, stares back at you. "God, I look horrific," you thought out loud. A habit, in hindsight, you needed to rid yourself of. Going through your morning routine, you think about the coming school year. 11th grade! Will this be the year you reinvent yourself? You could completely change yourself; The way you walk, talk, act, and dress!

...

Who are you kidding.

After successfully poking your eye with your eyeliner three times, you're done. You peak your head out your bathroom door, glancing at the cat-themed clock you've had since you were a baby. It's 8 am. Classes start at 8:15. Curses fall out of your mouth. Did time warp halfway through your routine or something? Running out of the bathroom you quickly change into your clothes, a worn out band T-shirt and black cargos. You can hear your mother cursing at you from downstairs as you make your way out your room. "You're going to be late on your first day, seriously?" Your mom deadpans as you reach the bottom of the stairs. "Whatever, mom, they don't even care."

Walking to school instead of letting your mother drive you was probably not the best idea, but you're too far from the house to care right now. You turn the final corner and arrive at your final location, North Shore High School. Approaching the doors, you can already make out two students face-mashing each other through the window.

✮✮✮

You've been a student at North Shore since freshman year, but anyone could mistake you for a new student, if they even noticed you that is. You pride yourself in being able to blend in with the crowd. This school was filled with losers, so you fit right in. They had already been assigned, so you made your way through the various cliques grouped up in the hallways and to your locker. As much as you hated this place, it's what you're used to. You'd have a hard time adjusting to a new high school, at least at this one you knew who to avoid. You don't even think about it anymore since you don't run into them much- nevermind. "Watch it, freak!"

Great, of anyone you could've bumped into, it's the queen bitch, Regina George. "Whatever." you mumbled and began to walk away when you were pulled back by your bag and shoved back into the lockers...hard. "This is the part where you apologize, Gerard Way." she spits at you while holding the straps of your backpack. A bit of black eyeliner and suddenly you're emo at this school. She was a couple inches taller than you, making it all the more embarrassing, looking up at her. Wriggling around proves unsuccessful. Is there a gym-bro buried beneath her layers of pink and pretty or something? Getting out of her grip doesn't seem like a possibility, so you begrudgingly mumble out a "Sorry..."

She stares at you for a few seconds too long.

"Uhm...can I go now?" You ask. "Yeah uh, sure, whatever." She finally lets you go and storms away towards her group of all-mighty "biatches", or "Plastics" as some (mainly Damien and Janis) call them.

So much for not being noticed.

✮✮✮

A/N: this is my first time writing, so any constructive criticism would be great! forgive any awkward wording or corny-ness. There are more chapters up on my wattpad and ao3, same username for both. @ziggyzolch

[angstics]

i finally articulated my opinion on my "is gerard way doing drag" question. my definition of drag is when a person impersonates, exaggerates, or appropriates a mode of gender expression. drag can be artistic or political (or both). drag can be an identity. drag and transgender identity are confused as the same thing. for some, it is. what is considered cross dressing can also be considered drag. it's important to note that drag is essential to queer culture, and how the us government harasses queer people through cross dressing, and now anti-drag, laws. we wouldnt be here talking about pop artists doing drag without drag performers and nonbinary-trans-gnc people.

to some people, a self-identified man in a female-identified dress is drag. "cross dressing" depends on cishet norms. queer people, especially nonbinary-trans-gnc people, have called to dismantle the assignment of gender to clothing. under that lens, a man in a dress is just a man in a dress -- for it to be drag, context and intent matters. that's how you get women doing female drag, or androgynous people doing what gerard way's been doing this last year on tour.

in asking "is gerard way doing drag?", im assigning importance to the topic. does it matter? within my understanding, drag is about intent and context as much as gender presentation. intent and context is what makes something important. therefore: understanding why the question is important solves it.

male music artists have a long history of cross dressing and doing drag. there's a good chance plugging any dude into a search engine with "drag" or "skirt" will bring something up. bowie, queen, nirvana, manic street preachers, placebo. here's a list. newer artists: lil nas x, harry styles, anthony green, pete wentz, young thug. some are impersonating female caricatures, some are masculinizing female clothes (long, ill-fitting, straight). some, like molko and lil nas, wear feminine clothes without exaggerating or masculinizing. gerard is in that same grey area.

male music artists have a long history of cross dressing and doing drag -- photos: "i want to break free" mv by queen (1984) / placebo in london (oct 1998) / lil nas x at audacy beach festival (dec 5, 2021) / fall out boy at rock for people (june 17, 2022)

all that history is why it was so weird when kerrang called gerard's riot fest "dress and heels" "a compelling show of contrarian anti-rock star eccentricity". it is not anti-rock star, at least not as described. it may be compelling, contrarian, and eccentric, but no reviewer really cares to analyze why. the closest they get is by identifying non-binary connection (them.us) and its relation to the "minefield that is American gender politics today" (latimes.com).

fans were struck by way's outfits for a lot of other reasons.

1. we have to get it out of the way that they just looked hot -- gerard is perpetually attractive, skirts are pretty. easy equation.

2. he has a long history of gender nonconformity. more on that in my #mcr queer studies tag. gerard is a 45 year old famously androgynous person who doesnt do labels, aligns himself with gender nonconformity (2014 reddit ama, 2018 advocate article, 2015 he/they tweet), and doesnt seem to care to be known as a man.

3. the tour outfits were well-fitted. many were crafted by skilled designer marina toybina and her team. which leads to ->

4. the outfits were very casual and very feminine. as mentioned, most men opt for masculine, ill-fitting skirts. which is to say they are NOT showing leg and they are definitely not showing ass. gerard doesnt steer clear from shortness or tightness or movement. he also dresses in ways people dress day to day -- the miniskirt is as casual as the shorts as casual as the jeans. there's some discussion to be had about what casual means -- he could be imitating expected presentation or just using basics, like his frequent shirt and pants.

the miniskirt is as casual as the shorts as casual as the jeans -- photos: firefly music festival (sept 23, 2022) / uncasville (sept 1, 2022) / eden project night 1 (may 16, 2022)

5. there was variety. many outfits, many types. he wasnt just doing pure femininity. some looks were high concept, some low concept. some gendered, some genderless. some feminine, some masculine. it was playful. its honesty evident in its fluidity yet cohesiveness. expanded in the next points ->

6. they incorporate elements of masculinity and gender neutrality concurrent with the feminine. his aggressive, energetic performance style often doesnt mind what people are seeing when his skirt lifts or shirt droops. he has little to no make-up -- if he does, it's stage and not glam. the closest he gets is the agender black swan look at boston night 1, the stage contour at wwwy night 3, and dubious lipstick at firefly. he also maintains the same hairstyle: barely styled, not straightened-curled. pinned a few times, gelled back some other times.

he has little to no make-up -- if he does, it's stage and not glam -- photos: boston night 1 (sept 7, 2022) / when we were young night 3 (oct 29, 2022) / firefly music festival (sept 23, 2022)

7. the character outfits weren't caricatures, like green's sleazy hooker or queen's uptight housewives. gerard's characters were appropriated but not exaggerated. cheerleader, nurse, manson girl, jackie o, princess diane, st joan. all figures of pop culture. he wore them as they were. even comparing green and way's similar white-green cheerleader costumes there's a difference in presentation. green wears long leggings, way wears shorts. green's costume is based on a stranger things character, way's is a custom remade vintage outfit. green exhibits the masculinization of feminine clothes which way subverts. this comparison highlights what makes way's outfits different, and therefore exciting to talk about.

green exhibits the masculinization of feminine clothes which way subverts -- photos: saosin in garden grove, ca (oct 27, 2022) / mcr in nashville, tn (aug 23, 2022)

8. and when he played with masculinity, it was in a way that was dubbed "boydrag". the new jersey night 2 casino singer look was a dramatic caricature that heightened masculine features until they were pure style... the defintion of camp. he had a mustache -- thin like john waters or a confirmed bachelor, and drawn on with eyeliner. he had a suit -- a pink-gold, glittery woman's cut jacket with a glittery bowtie and pleated shirt. the dramatic flair is accentuated by the black eye make-up, the frank sinatra "my way" cover, the drum tag: "the house always wins".

the defintion of camp -- photos: new jersey night 2 (sept 21, 2022) 1 / 2

when i asked which outfits others considered drag, all replies identified the casino singer and jackie o as drag and the rest as "just clothes". this relation made me understand why the rest couldnt be drag despite all the connections i talked about above. the jackie o outfit doesnt exaggerate the source like casino singer, but the source itself is both highly dramatic and highly gendered. cheer is gendered but not highly dramatic, st joan dramatic but not highly gendered. diane is gendered and dramatic, but not highly. the list goes on and on. it's a fine line. especially cheer could tip into drag for me.

but the source itself is both highly dramatic and highly gendered -- photos: mcr at riot fest (oct 12, 2022) / jackie kennedy onassis (jan 3, 1971)

if drag is understood in this way, simply wearing gendered clothes isnt drag. the look itself has to be about the performance of gender, however that may be presented. that’s the importance of classification. we can see what the artist is doing.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

03/07/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; David Jenkins; Samba Schutte; Dominic Burgess; Lindsey Cantrell; Rhys Darby; Fan Spotlight; Never Left Podcast; Cast Cards; AdoptOurCrew; SaveOFMD Crew; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika;

I figure we could all use some normalcy tonight so I'm going to treat tonight like every other night and bring some news in-- Love Notes are where to go for commentary/love tonight lovelies.

== David Jenkins ==

All the photos from his Instagram Post Are listed here on Tumblr

Instagram Source

== Samba Schutte ==

Good news! Samba ISNT GONNA STOP POSTING BTS!

Samba BTS Videos

OFMD 2 Set Shoutout #2 Video Part 1

OFMD 2 Set Shoutout #2 Video Part 2

OFMD 2 Set Shoutout #2 Video Part 3

OFMD 2 Set Shoutout #2 Video Part 4

OFMD 2 Set Shoutout #2 Video Part 5

Rhys Wink Video - @kiwistede ty

#Crew4Life video

== Dominic Burgess ==

Being the upstanding gentleman that he is, Dominic is still out here supporting us.

== Lindsey Cantrell ==

Getting love from Lindsey regarding our loss. Ty so much hon.

== Rhys Darby ==

Look whose cameo is back 👀

== Fan Spotlight ==

== Never Left Podcast ==

The Never Left Podcast has decided to throw hands and I fucking love it. Balls for days. Never Left Podcast - A Message for David Zaslav and Casey Bloys

Art by: AmysBirdHouse

= Cast Cards =

Even with the bad news, our lovely @melvisik is still at it! More cast members to collect! Love it!

== Watch Party Reminders ==

March 8th - Next Goal Wins!

When:  8 pm GMT / 3 pm EST / 12 pm PST

Thank you @lamentus1 for the info! Now available to buy in the UK: £11.99 @ Apple (https://tinyurl.com/mr3p6bvm) and £9.99 or £11.99 @ Amazon https://tinyurl.com/2fwdmezz. 

(US fans can watch on Hulu, and Disney Plus)

Watch Party Hashtags:

#SaveOFMD

#OurFlagWins

Mar 4 - Mar 8: Wrecked Season 1

Don't have access? DM @iamadequate1 on Twitter or Tumblr

Season 1 watch from March 4th to March 8th. 

Times will be 10pm GMT / 5pm EST / 4pm CST / 2pm PST. 

Saturday there will be a re-watch for those who need to catch up (time TBD) .

Hashtags: 

#WreckedPirates

#SaveOFMD

#RhysDarbyFaction

== Adopt Our Crew ==

A message from our dear friends at @adoptourcrew

== Save OFMD Crew ==

Our good friends over at @saveofmdcrewmates also had a message for us.

== Love Notes ==

Hey there lovelies. Boy. What a day it's been, huh?

Never thought the clowning/honking would stop. I have to say, I'm glad at least that David saw all our commentary about "if he thought there was no hope he'd say something" and did in fact say something.

It's a bit of a hard pill to swallow, I know. We're all going through the various stages of grief right now. Some of us are already progressing on at a quick rate, others are still at the beginning.

I know I've said some of this across the platforms so I apologize if you've heard it already, but I think it's important to hear.

YOU DID EVERYTHING YOU POSSIBLY COULD.

Whether it was only signing the petition, or tweeting every day for a week, or just supporting your crewmates. Every little bit to every large bit you did--

You did EVERYTHING you could.

None of this is your fault. None of this is David or the Cast's fault, and certainly none of it is the fans fault. You did everything you could, and even if it feels like it it was all for nothing, it meant so very very much.

Every Cast and Crew member got to see how much they meant to you. Smaller cast members like our friends Wendy Anderson, and Damien Gerard, and Dominic Burgess have all gotten to feel so much love from us. They've come in and participated with us in our various fuckeries, and we've gotten to know them better because of it!

Every single streaming service we targeted got to see just how much queer media means to us. So many new fans got to join us on this journey because we were loud, polite menaces, and we made a safe space for them to join us. Not just streaming services and new fans, but products, and groups too! Fucking Astroglide did watch parties with us, squishables got involved! Q+ and Pink News!

News Media ALL OVER THE DAMN PLANET looked at us and commiserated and shared their distaste for our loss.

ALL OF THAT MATTERS.

If ONE streaming service picks up a true queer show (not just queer bait) because they saw our engagement, it was worth every single tear lost.

If ONE queer kid, years from now, gets a show where they feel represented because we fought for our silly little pirate show, it was worth EVERY SINGLE EFFORT.

IF ONE of your crew-mates felt included and decided to stick around on this planet a little longer because of it, IT WAS WORTH IT.

IT MATTERS.

It already matters so much, to all of us. I get to spend every day, feeling hope in humanity because of this fandom. Every single day I come online and I see just how creative, and kind, and accepting you all are, and it gives me so much hope for the future. I feel loved again, for me, not who I pretend to be in my day to day life.

We raised money for SO MANY charities. We made LITERAL differences in people's lives. People we don't know, and who don't know us. Do you know how incredibly powerful that is?

Do you know just how much those tiny ripples cascade over this entire earth? Kindness is one of the most powerful driving forces in this world. It is not quantifiable in any way, and yet it makes such an impact.

We have some of the most amazingly talented, and resourceful, and brilliant people on the planet in this crew. That's all of you. You are absolute treasures, every single one of you.

And you know what? You didn't fucking deserve this.

You deserved your show back. You fought hard for it, and you are allowed to be angry about it. You are allowed to cry, or scream, or lie on the floor and not get up for a while. You are allowed to grieve.

Some of you haven't got there yet. Some of you are still fighting the good fight, or trying to support others, and just know lovelies, we will all be there when you struggle too.

I've said it before, but grief isn't linear, it comes in waves, and no matter how each of us proceeds tomorrow, it's going to continue to take time to heal from.

Whatever YOU NEED to cope, do it.

Do you wanna "Fuck it we ball" and keep fighting? Fucking do it.

Do you wanna go cry in a corner and take a week off? Fucking do it.

Do you wanna go hug a fellow crew-mate and tell them a goofy ass joke so they laugh? Fucking do it.

Do you wanna go read fanfiction til you pass out? Make sure to drink some water, but go fucking do it.

Do you wanna draw, or sing, or write something that gets some of this awful energy out? Well? You guessed it--Go fucking do it.

BUT a gentle reminder lovelies:

Don't go hurt anyone, they don't deserve it.

Don't hurt yourself, YOU don't deserve it.

We've got discords, and tumblr, and twitter, and dm's galore. If you need support, reach out. I know so many of your crew are reaching out to each other to send love and support, and dole out all the hugs.

Lean on each other.

We are in this together.

We still have each other, and we will continue to.

This is not the end for OFMD. Whether it gets renewed in 10 years, or gets a movie, or graphic novels, or some other medium. This is not the end. It's certainly not the end of any of the cast & crew's careers. We will have so much to support them in going forward.

This fandom, these friends, don't end with this.

Keep making your fanfiction-- write and draw your own s3! Share it! Take this wonderful piece of queer art and joy that means so much to us and keep extending its infinite universes. Write meta and discuss and laugh and cry about it. We have lost the potential for s3, but we haven't lost what we already have, which is a glorious piece of media.

We have the cast & crew who continue to support and send love, and share our artwork and stories.

We have each other.

Now I'm gonna go mama bear on you and ask you to consider some things:

Have you had any water lately? Have you had anything to eat? Have you slept? Have you gone to the bathroom lately? Have you been outside, even for a moment?

Then finally, going with one last thing. This song helped me a lot today. Maybe it'll give you some love today too.

Just Begun by WILD

Not your vibe? Are you angry? @celluloidbroomcloset reminded me of this gem today:

This isn't the end crew.

This fandom is our home. We've just begun.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

I realize the vibe might be off for these gifs but you deserve dopamine inducing gifs, you can fight me about it later.

Rhys gif: @ofmd-ann / Taika Gif: @dallonismysavior

[storiesforallfandoms]

good girl ~ gerard way

word count: 2990

request?: yes!

“okayokayokay, hear me out, dads best friend! gerard x reader. you’re franks kid, going on tour with them, and yeah, that’s kinda all i have. current time, with a hint of thigh riding, smut with praise, kinda fluffy afterwards. you should look it up but gerard wore shorts on stage last night and holy shit, i’m dead. thank you so fuckin much!”

description: they said nothing was going to happen while she was on tour with them, that nothing could happen while she was on tour with them, but then he came out in those damn shorts

pairing: gerard way x female!iero!reader

warnings: swearing, smut (thigh riding, praise kink, unprotected sex), age gap (reader is in their 20s, gerard is 45), rpf (if you don’t like it, don’t read)

masterlist (one, two, three)

He knew what he was doing. There’s no way he didn’t. He knew I was joining them today, and he just so happened to come out in a pair of hot shorts showing off those thighs that I had gotten off on so many times before? After I told him we couldn’t do this while we were with my dad? Yeah, this was definitely on purpose.

“Are you listening to me, Squirt?” dad asked, nudging me out of my thoughts.

Shit, how long have I been staring? Has dad noticed?

“Yeah,” I lied.

“What did I say?”

“You called me Squirt.”

Dad chuckled and rolled his eyes. I smiled and tried not to look over at Gerard. He was talking to Mikey and their stage manager, turned side on from me. I glanced over for a split second, just in time to see he was already looking at me. He smirked and winked at me. My face grew hot and I quickly looked away.

We knew this was wrong. At least, I think we did. The first time it happened we said it was wrong. Gerard was dad’s friend, his bandmate. I was a little less than half his age. He had a kid, a kid I had babysat numerous times when I was a teenager. Everything about the situation was wrong. Dad would freak out if he knew, the public probably would, too. We swore the first time would be the only time.

But then he came over one night during the summer for dinner. I was wearing a sundress, he was in shorts and a tank top. Next thing I knew, he had me bent over the bathroom sink with my dress pushed up around my hips.

“One time” turned into “many times” and, eventually, we stopped saying that it was wrong out loud. But we did agree we wouldn’t be doing this while dad was around. No one could ever know, but especially not dad. Gerard didn’t want to put his friendship with dad or the band in jeopardy. when I agreed to go on tour with the band for a while, we had an agreement that there would be no funny business.

I guess that agreement wasn’t going to last long.

“Alright everyone, places in ten minutes,” the stage manager announced before leaving the room.

“Everyone, circle,” Mikey announced. The band moved together, putting their arms around each other and bowing their heads. Mikey looked over at me and nodded his head. “Come on, little Iero, you too.”

“This is a band ritual, though,” I said.

“You’re an honorary member for now,” dad said. “No arguing. Come on.”

He extended an arm to me. It felt like some cruel trick of fate that the one he had unconnected from, leaving a space for me to get between, was Gerard. I took a deep breath and moved in between them. Dad put his hand around my shoulder, but Gerard put his hand on my lower back. I prayed no one noticed my body stiffen as they started their usual pre-show speech.

When everyone pulled away to take their places, Gerard leaned into my ear to whisper, “Meet me at my room after the show.”

I felt a tingle run down my spine and between my legs.

I tried to focus only on the concert as I watched the band perform, but it was hard to keep my mind from wandering when Gerard was there, in those goddamn shorts, and now he was getting all hot and sweaty while performing. Near the end of the show, his long hair was was slick with sweat and sticking to his forehead. It felt like the show was dragging on for hours and it would never end. I wasn’t sure how I was going to stop myself from jumping his bones the second he walked off the stage.

The after show adrenaline backstage was just as hard to get through. The guys were all jittering withing adrenaline and excitement. I didn’t want to break up their fun, or to seem suspicious, but I was itching to get back to the hotel so I could go to Gerard’s room. I was standing with my thighs clenched together, feeling hot and sweaty as if I were the one who just performed. I was slightly embarrassed by how desperate I was feeling, but only slightly.

The drive back to the hotel was short. We all said goodnight to one another before heading to our respective hotel rooms. I listened to make sure I heard all three doors close, meaning dad, Mikey, and Ray wouldn’t see anything, before making a beeline for Gerard’s room. He was waiting for me at the door, immediately taking me into his arms and kissing me with a combination of passion and aggression. He fumbled with the room key while still kissing me, but finally managed to swipe it and open the door. He pulled me into the room and shoved me against the door once it shut again.

“I can’t believe you,” I muttered against his lips. “We said none of this while on tour.”

“I can’t help it,” he said. “I’m so addicted to you. I don’t think I can give you up.”

Gerard pressed his lips against mine again before I could say anything. His hands slipped under my shirt and pressed against my skin. I already felt hot, but his touch made me feel like I was on fire. I was gripping at his shirt, too, still damp from the sweat, when my fingers brushed over the waistband of his shorts.

“These fucking shorts,” I groaned between kisses.

Gerard smirked. “You like them, huh?”

“Don’t pretend you didn’t do this on purpose. You knew how these shorts were going to make me feel.”

He pulled away, that damn smirk still on his face. He took my hand and pulled me further into the room. He sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding my hand in his. He was looking up at me with lust filled eyes, the look alone causing a new puddle to form in my panties.

“Take your pants off,” he told me. I did as he said, unbuttoning my jeans and letting them fall to the floor. I stepped out of them and kicked them aside. “Good girl.”

I almost whimpered. God, he knew what praise did to me.

“Now,” he patted on thigh, “climb on up here, princess.”

I got onto his lap, placing my legs on either side of his thigh so I was straddling it. He placed his hands on my hips and lowered me so my clothes core was directly on his thigh. I let out a whimper at the friction. I had been longing for any sort of contact for so long that just the faint brush of my panties against my clit sent tingles through my body and caused a louder moan to slip past my lips.

“Shh,” Gerard said. “We don’t want anyone to hear you, do we?”

I shook my head, biting my lip to hold in any other involuntary noises.

“Good girl,” he said again. He kissed me gently before saying, “Now, get off on my thigh like a good girl.”

I started moving my hips, letting the friction grow. Any noises I made came out muffled against my lips. If I was in a different state of mind, I’d probably feel a little pathetic in the situation - mewling on Gerard’s lap in desperation to get myself off. We weren’t even having sex yet and I was already a mess. But I only had one thing on my mind, one endgame to work towards.

I put my arms around his neck to ground myself as I continued to grind. His hands were still resting on my waist, but he wasn’t controlling my movements. He was letting me go at my own pace. He was watching me so intently, like I was the most beautiful art he had ever seen.

“You’re doing so good, babe,” he breathed. “You look so beautiful when you’re coming undone like that.”

I tried to say something in return, but it just came out as incoherent babbles. Gerard chuckled and pulled me in for another kiss. His tongue poked at my bottom lip, asking for permission to enter. I parted my lips and let his tongue explore my mouth. He swallowed my moans, which had become harder to control. I was nearing my climax quicker than I had anticipated. I wasn’t ready for it yet. I wanted this to go on for longer.

But Gerard knew I was close. His hands were now gripping my hips and moving me a little bit faster. Against my lips, he mumbled, “I want you to cum on my lap, pretty girl. Please cum on my lap.”

He forcefully kissed my lips as a scream of pleasure ripped through my throat without warning. My body trembled as my orgasm washed over me. How he made me feel so good with just his thigh, I would never know. He made me feel better than any man my age ever could.

I started to come down from my high as I realized I was being moved. Gerard was lifting me from his lap and gently placing me on the bed. He stood at the end and quickly removed his clothes. I did the same, ridding myself of my panties, shirt, and bra. We were both completely naked, just looking at one another. He always somehow made me feel both confident and insecure under his gaze. He looked at me with such hunger in his eyes that I wanted to let him have me however he wanted, but also I wanted to cover myself up. I always felt so many conflicting things when we were together.

He climbed onto the bed, hovering over me. He lowered himself so his body was flush against mine, engulfing me with his heat. He kissed me again, feverishly. I could feel his dick, hard and throbbing, against my inner thigh, mere inches from where I wanted him most. My hips bucked involuntarily. His tip grazed my entrance, causing the two of us to moan together.

“Is this what you want?” he asked, running his dick between my folds. “You want this inside of you, good girl?”

“P-Please,” I begged. “Please, I need you inside of me. Need it so bad, need you so bad.”

“You sound so pretty when you beg.” He reached between us and lined himself up with my entrance. “Ask me one more time.”

“Please, Gerard. Please fuck me.”

With one thrust, he filled me completely. I gasped at the sensation, which was followed by another moan. He covered my mouth with his hand, suppressing the moan before it fully erupted out of me. He slowly pulled out of me until it was just the tip inside of me, then pushed all the way back in. I could feel every inch of him slowly pulling out and filling me up, dragging along my walls and pushing against my g-spot with every thrust inwards. The sore feeling I had from my recent orgasm quickly melted away into pleasure again.

Gerard buried his head in the crook of my neck, leaving kisses along my neck and shoulder between attempts to muffle his own groans and moans. My moans and whimpers came out muffled against his hand. He started to pick up the pace with his thrusts. With his body against mine, his pelvic bone was rubbing against my clit with every thrust. The combined stimulation of him rubbing against my clit and his dick abusing my g-spot had my lower stomach tightening again in no time. I had no way of telling him this time around that I was getting close, so I just had to let my orgasm wash over me. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as my body began to tremble again, screams of pleasure muffled, but just barely, against his hand.

He was whispering praises into my ear but I felt so far off that I could barley hear them. The only thing keeping me grounded and present was the feeling of my nails digging into his skin and his desperate thrusts, now becoming a little sloppier. It wasn’t long until I could feel him spilling inside of me. He bit down on my shoulder to try and keep himself quiet, undoubtably also leaving marks there. I barley cared at the time, but at least he left them in a spot that would be easy to cover.

We both laid there, tangled up in one another for some time. I was still feeling lightheaded, chasing that wonderful post-climax feeling and slowly coming down from it. If I didn’t have to move at all for the rest of time, I would’ve been content. I could’ve laid there with him for so long if that were possible.

When he got up and pulled himself out of me, I felt empty. There’s always a feeling of slight disappointment after sex that it couldn’t go on for longer, or that you had to separate from one another at all. Gerard took a moment to catch his breath before standing from the bed.

“I have to shower,” he said. “Do you wanna come with?”

I happily agreed. I followed him into the bathroom and waited as he started up the shower. Within seconds the mirror was steamed over from the hot water. I didn’t think I’d be able to handle a hot shower, but the minute the hot water touched my skin I felt like I was in paradise. Taking a shower where the water was anything cooler than scolding hot was definitely not an option for me. I let Gerard use the hotel provided shampoo and body wash first, seeing as he was the one who had performed an entire show before we had sex. I stood back as he washed himself, taking in the sight of his body covered in suds and water.

“We’re really bad at this,” I blurted without thinking.

He turned to look at me. “What do you mean?”

“We keep saying we’re going to stop, and then we never do.”

He sighed and tilted his head back to rinse the shampoo from his hair. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“What we’re doing isn’t right.”

“It feels right.”

I felt a smile tugging at my lips. Yeah, it definitely felt right. But morally it wasn’t right. Was it?

“Do you think, if the circumstances were different, that we’d be a normal couple?” Gerard asked as he stepped back, allowing me to let the water run over me.

“What do you mean?” I asked. I definitely noticed his use of the word “couple”, but decided not to mention it just yet. I hadn’t ever thought of us in that way, in a “relationship” type of way. Not that I didn’t want to. I know Gerard would be a perfect boyfriend, probably the best one I could ever ask for, but I didn’t think he saw what we were doing in that way. It had just been sex. There were some moments that it felt like more than that, but for the most part I knew that’s all it was and all it likely would ever be.

“Like...if you weren’t my best friend’s kid, do you think we would ever actually...be able to explore what we have? To actually go out together on dates and be able to hold hands in public and be together. Not to sneak around behind closed doors and hope no one notices the brief glances we have when we’re in public?”

I was shocked. I didn’t think Gerard had thought of what we were doing in that way. It had never been brought up before, so I just assumed we were on the same page in terms of this being a “no strings attached” type of deal.

“I think...I think we would,” I admitted. “Granted, it might be a little controversial with the age difference.”

“It would be, but we’re both adults regardless of the age difference. It’s not like you just turned 18 and I’m a gross middle aged man waiting to be able to date you.”

I scrunched my nose in disgust at his comparison. “Yeah, the world sees enough of that as it is. I think a relationship between someone in their mid 20s and someone in their 40s is the least people have to worry about.”

Gerard took my face in his hands suddenly and leaned down to kiss me. It was sweet and gentle, just a normal kiss because he felt like kissing me. I leaned into him, returning it because I just felt like kissing him, too.

This, I thought to myself, is what it would feel like to be able to just be a normal couple. Just to kiss each other because we feel like it.

We turned off the water as it started to run cold. We both dried off and got ready for bed. I knew I should’ve gone back to my own room, that it would be suspicious if anyone came looking for me the next morning and I wasn’t there, but I didn’t want to go back. I wanted to spend the night with Gerard, and he wanted me there, too.

We climbed into bed together. Gerard turned off the lamp next to the bed and the room was plunged into darkness. He took me into his arms, holding me to him as the fatigue finally started to wash over us. I rested my head on his chest, listening to his heart beating, as I closed my eyes.

This is what it would be like if we could be a normal couple, was the last thought I had before I finally drifted off to sleep.

*I’m sorry there wasn’t more to the smut. I got sick in the middle of writing this and found myself struggling to finish the smutty bits. I hope it was okay otherwise!*

[blue-the-hedgehog]

Teen Wolf 2x12 but it goes a little different.

He really had a shitty year. He wouldn’t dare to compare it to his friends but he really had a shitty year. Ok maybe Scott turning into a werewolf because of him was not good but at least he wouldn’t die of an athma attack and he became captain of the lacrosse team, ok maybe jackson turning into a manipulated lizard wasn’t fun but he half bring it upon himself as he was so obsessed about taking the bite to became the best , ok Lydia being hurt and manipulated by Peter Hale and her feeling like she is going crazy wasn’t good but now that she knew she seem a little better tho, ok Isaac’s father being killed will the boy was facing his new found wolfiness wasn’t good but he deserved it and he knew that Isaac would come around at some point, ok Boyd and Erica being hunted and tortured weren’t the best way to came into your new superpowered self and ok Allison had saw her aunt throat being ripped of and her mom killed herself, they were both psycho but still it was not fine. Now he was in his jeep with Lydia Martin after he get to find her. He had pushed her away but when his dad had told him that he was a hero, which he wasn’t really, he get back to find her. He had a phone call from Erica telling him that her and Boyd where free because of Chris Argent. it was good ! At least one good thing! Alright maybe he should have get to Allison after her mom’s death and get her into the really VIP club of the-ones-with-dead-mom… maybe she wouldn’t have been so quick to hunt Derek and his pack. Oh he should have bring Derek in the club too! The three of them would have bound around this similarity and maybe everything would have been fine!! Does Scott have told her why Derek at bite her mom? No, he certainly didn’t… So he should have told her and they all should be a little angry at Scott because she should have been, and Derek can be too because Scott always put every bad thing on Derek, and Stiles is angry too because his best friend never asked if he was alright! And always ditch him for his girlfriend! Talking about motherless people, he should have extend the invitation to Isaac too!

That what he was thinking when he tumbled into the warehouse and hit Lizard-Jackson. Everybody looked at him and Lydia as they jumped out of the car. He looked around and almost directly understood what was going on in here: Isaac was still full of dagger's wounds, Allison had said daggers in hands and was ready to fight, Scott was looking at Stiles with a confused look, somewhere hidding was Peter, he saw the body of Gerard Argent lying in a puddle of black goo and he saw Derek still paralysed on the floor in Beta form,wrecked and a betrayed look on his face. When he get back to reality Lydia went to Jackson and everybody was concentrated on them. Except Stiles, he kept his eyes on the evil Argent Grandpa, he looked dead, everybody thought he was dead. But he saw it , the suptil twitch of fingers. He start to head toward him slowly, well it wasn’t like anybody would notice him. As he arrive next to the old man he heard Peter and Derek leap to Jackson and dig their claws in his torso, back and front. A loud gasp of everyone, a sad scream of Lydia. The strawberry blond girl was crying as Jackson was dying in her arm. She started to walk away when suddenly everybody could heard claws scraping against the floor and Jackson rise back to life as a werewolf. Great so fucking great now the guy will be in the back-from-the-dead-werewolf club with Peter and once again he will be the only one to be alone in a club. He should really had invited Allison and Derek in his dead-mom club!They all cheered up but he felt Gerard try to move under the foot he had put on him to pin him on the ground and he couldn't help but gave him a hit in the face that was received with a grunt. Everybody turned toward him, Scott with his "it's not how we do things" look, not a single "what happened to your face Stiles?" and something hurt in his chest when he saw that Derek was trying to avoid his eyes. Does the guy thaught that he had something to do with all of this? whatever it is. So he look at Scott hand asked before his best friend opened his mouth.

-What have you done Scott?

-I didn't do any...

-Cut your crap!! What the fuck have you done?!

Stiles was pissed, really pissed and Scott wasn't used to be the target of this much of anger from his best friend. So he offered his best puppy eyes and explained what he had done. And,God help him, Stiles look furious after that. Every soul in this place saw Stiles assessing eyes fall on them, one by one and finally again on Derek. Did the man really thought that Stiles was a part of this shity plan? that he would have breatrayed him like this?! And then, Stiles snaped. He was fuming

-You really had go with this shit of a plan without coming to me for advise?! You are really this stupid Scott?! but I will handle you last ! First someone come and get this VERY ALIVE old creep tied up tightly thank you!

Chris came quickly to put handcuf and rope on Gerard, gun ready to shoot just in case. Stiles walked to Allison and held a finger out to her face.

-You! Can you tell me why you came so violently after Derek and his pack?

She held her head high and almost bite with her words

-Because Derek killed my mother Stiles! You know that my mother his dead! You can't understand!

Stiles’ finger drop with his hand along his side, he shook his head, sadness creeping into the anger and suddenly a little laugh came from Stiles and harsh look and tone were directed to the young huntress

-I can't understand? Me? Your mom is dead yes, It's sad, and I'm sorry for you Allison. But you are seventeen, you should have enough maturity to see what's happening! Derek didn't kill your mom! He had bite her! He had bite her to protect Scott from your fucking psychotic mom who was trying to kill him! She killed herself! She choose to die ! She could have lived as a Werewolf but she choose your stupid family code over her husband and daughter! My mom died too, but my mom never had the choice! She died when I was ten! You aunt killed the entire Hale family, she had killed Derek's mom when he was sixteen! And you dare coming after him because your mom choose to kill herself ?! You don't think that the fact that he loose all his family because of YOUR aunt and had to run away and had to fight your family again, is enough? and I don't list everything here! You came after Erica and Boyd who did nothing to your family for this too?! You had hurt Isaac this bad for this too?! You had fucking worried your dad for this too... You had loose your mom, he had loose his wife ... So get it together ! You are acting like a poor spoiled princess and don't even care about hurting other people ! I don't care that you had been manipulated by your grand father, you could have listen to your dad, I know that he had tried...

The girl opened her mouth to argue but she couldn't came with anything and looked down letting her daggers fall on the floor.

-I...I'm sorry Stiles...I..I had let my pain blind me and I didn't though about all this

-YES OBVIOUSLY!

Derek was looking at Stiles with wide eyes, a little warmth was growing into his chest. The boy was defending him? Then Stiles started to lecture everyone in the room, coming to Lydia and Jackson after that.

-Lydia, you already had your lecture earlier, think about it would you?

She nodded and almost hide herself behind the very naked Jackson. Stiles sigh before he fetch a spare sweetpant and t-shirt that he let in his car. He through it to the blond boy and didn't wait to speak first

-Just take the fucking clothes! Yes you can throw away those filthy and cheap rags when you get home if you want. But just Shut up and take it. And stop wanting things that people don't recommend to you. Fucking LISTEN! It could help you, don't you think? The bite that you wanted so damn much had changed you in a big lizard manipulated by a stupid teenager seeking revange and after that an evil old man seeking for the bite too! they had used you! So work on yourself now!

Jackson's jaws clench but he noded too once he had put on Stiles's clothes.

-Thanks for the clothes.

-You're welcome, I couldn’t let you walk around naked I'm not a monster...

A low growl, practicaly imperceptible by anyone took place in Derek's chest, he didn't like the fact that Stiles' scent was now all over Jackson. It felt wrong. But he took on him and follow the boy that was now mooving to Isaac. But a softer look appeared on the sheriff's son face

-Are you ok Isaac? Did it heal fine?

The young werewolf nodded and looked at Stiles confused by the soft tone but suddenly something more sour hint in the pale boy's voice.

-How is it to be Scott best friend for a few days? fun? Do you see what happen when you follow his stupid plans blindly without using your brain? You get fucking hurt! Because he don't take you in count in his plan! He didn't thought that you could be fucking hurt! You should stick to your alpha and don't go following my stupid childhood best friend if you are not ready to use your brain! You could have died today! learn to take care of you would you!?

Isaac looked shipishly at Stiles and let a little whine escape. Stiles had use a softer tone and hadn't yell at him. Stiles came to ruffle slowly Isaac hair.

-What I'm saying is that you are clever and you know how to survive but once someone show you some attention you just do wathever they say and t's not safe for you Isaac, I don't want you to be hurt for something like today or be use by someone you understand?

The young wolf nod and melt a little against Stiles touch. The human had been kind, he knew that Isaac would be affraid if he had yell or seemed ready to hit him. But even softer he had made his point heard. Then the boy get to Peter.

-You creeper Wolf! If you had helped your nephew this wouldn't had happened! You just had to kill the evil grandpa and everything would have been fine! Stop hiding !! You want your last remaining family to die ?!

-No, I don't! You have no lesson to tell me you little human!

-Yes I have some actually! You really have to learn how to take care of the ones you love! Because I know you care about Derek! So act like it would you!! You are really smart! I know that you saw what you could have done to avoid this outcome don't you?

-...Yes ,you're right...You're a smart little brat aren’t you?

A mischievous smile was on Peter's face but fall right away when Stiles looked at him with daggers in his eyes. He turn toward Scott, his gaze dark, his fists clenched so tight that his knuckles where white. His tone low and dangerous.

-You! You are the worst best friend that someone could ask for!

-Why are you…

-SHUT UP SCOTT! Didn’t you forgot someone when you did your little pact with Evil grandpa over there?! Do you really care so little about me that you didn’t even ask what happened to me?! Do you see my face?! I may have a few ribs almost broke! The old psychopath over there had abducted me and brought me in a freaking bassement with Boyd and Erica , the two of them being tortured and I had been beaten up because I am your friend! it was a message for you !! You didn't even care about your very human childhood bestfriend before your little huntress of a girlfriend who know how to use weapons! I don't talk about Mama McCall, you had done right for that at least! God! what even was your shitty plan here...Don't! Don't try to tell me that it work because if I wasn't their the Evil old man would have escape! You know pretty well what you just did to Derek!! You had used something very dear to him without telling him about it before!You had let him took the blame for Allison's mother without even giving her the explanation she deserve! She deserve to know why her mother had choose to kill herself! Do you think a little sometimes about peoples feelings? We are living people Scott, not just side kicks in a teen serie where you are the hero!

The young wolf looked like a kicked puppy but wouldn't dare to spoke as he had never saw his bestfriend so angry, hurt and betrayed. Stiles came to put a hand on Chris shoulder, his voice softened.

-As you see I'm not affraid to yell at big strong adults...if you can call Peter an adult... First, I'm sorry for your loss...I can't tell that I know first hand how it is to loose a wife but I saw my dad after my mother died... It was... really bad. You handle it well in comparison. I offer it in his behave but, don't hesitate to go talk to my dad if in need. He would be glade to share a beer with you. Secondly, I heard on my way here that you had helped Erica and Boyd to get free, thank you for that, I wasn't strong enough and maybe a little too stupid ... You are a good man Mister Argent.

-You had done well kid, a lot of people would have run and hide at your place you know?

Chris offered a small smile to Stiles. The teen then walk to Derek and point a finger at him. The man crossed his arms trying to look bigger and confident, ready to took a big yell. But he couldn't help his eyes to go wide when he heard the soft and concern tone in Stiles voice.

-You!! Are you alright? I'm sorry for what Scott had done to you, he should have talk about his plan with you before. If it confort you I wasn't aware of it neither. It was half good and half really stupid, so many things has not been taken in concideration. And I don't want you to think that I was a part of that! If I was it would have been almost perfect, and you would have known, I wouldn't have done that to you...But you should communicate more you know that?! Anyway, you shouldn't have to be forced to bite someone, and even more this filthy Evil Old grandpa and..

Derek couldn't take it he was listening intendly at Stiles but his bruised cheek and his slited lips was distracting. He took the boy’s face carefully in his hands as everyone gasped at the mouvement and as the man dared to cut Stiles mid-sentence. His eyes glowing red as soon as he felt Stiles’ pain.

-Stiles, just a second... Me, I'm fine, I'm okay, No wound that couldn't heal in minutes and nothing more than a deep feeling of filthiness, betrayal and now it don't seem so important because I know that you are not a part of it... I know it's strange... But ...You... Are you ok? You have more than just you face...You have so much pain ...

Derek couldn't help and had started to drow pain from Stiles, The teen was in so much pain that Derek couldn't understand how he was still standing and yelling to everyone. And as easy as he had snapped from anger, Stiles broke from hurt and the loss of adrenaline, tears falling from those big bambi whisky eyes. Violent sobs escaped Stiles as he hold his ribs even if he couldn't feel the pain right now. Derek was heartbroken as he smell the suddent scent of sadness, fear and pain rolling in wave from Stiles. He couldn't hold a whine and he pull causiously the human against him. With one hand Stiles gripped at his shirt like it was a life line.

-I...I hate all of this! I know that sometimes I don't care about people feelings but now it's too much. Everyone fight because they are too self centered to care about others. And Erica and Boyd where tortured and I couldn't helped them...a...And I didn't even had the chance to enjoy my good game of tonight because I had been abducted and beaten up by this old freak! and ...And It was a really good game you know? I ..I scored a few time and I made us win! Do you believe it!!And I had done everything for Scott, I know it's my fault if he had been turned, it should have been me... (« yes! i should have bite you indeed ! » they all could hear Peter add in the back) But do you think it's normal that he totally forget about me when it come to protecting people he love?! Like her dad would never let Allison be hurt by anyone! And Mamà McCall know about all the supernatural stuff! But me, my dad didn't even know ... I had to lie to him once again...And I’m alone!! I can’t heal fast! I don’t have super strength or, know how to use weapons. It’s a matter of time before you see that Lydia is smarter than me! And we all know she is more than human! I’m the only basic human here! And my best friend forgot to negotiate my safety… And you! You should start to take care of yourself ! Talk to us and try to trust some of us… I know that it will be difficult now because of what Scott had done here but you could trust me!! I trust You! I don’t want you to die!! I care about you! So stop doing your thing alone !! An Alpha is stronger with a big pack! So stop shutting people willing to be part of it away!! I can help even if I’m not a wolf!!

Stiles knew that he should have stop talking long ago as he could hear Scott whimpering. But he was hurt, he had a really rough day and when he saw what had happened here it was too much for him on so many levels. He could feel that Derek had tensed a little and suddenly his sob stoped. Oh god he had told this out loud isn’t it?! He was so fucked, he needed to run away from those two strong and warm arms. He tried to slip away but Derek hold tightened around him and he felt Derek’s cheek against him before the wolf start to nuzzled the crook of his neck. it felt so warm and intimate and he felt safe and so calm that he didn’t move. The Alpha talked low and soft.

-Stiles, I’m sorry… I thought that you didn’t trust me … Didn’t realize that You really cared about me… It’s okay you’re safe … you are not alone

Stiles’ hold tight on Derek’s shirt, his brain start to fill with a fog. The werewolf was draining his pain as he hugged him, he was warm and strong, a shelter of safety around his broken body. The teen let the tiredness took over, Jackson wasn’t a lizard anymore, the old psycho grandpa was tied up, Erica and Boyd were free and safe at the loft waiting for him, Allison was a little confused but hopefully not willing to kill Derek anymore, Lydia was fine, Scott had been yelled at and he would make sure later that Melissa will punish him for his stupidity, Isaac would hopefully think before following Scott’s plan from now, Chris Argent was on their side, Peter was…well Peter but not up to no good for now , no dangerous police call had emanated from the radio in the jeep so his dad was safe at home and Derek was wrapped up around him so he was sure that the man was fine. A smile appeared on his lips as he fall asleep in Derek’s arms.

-‘m feeling like a mom… kids are exhausting…

Derek carried him bridal style, smiling fondly as everyone hold small laugh. Next morning, Stiles woke up in his bed, the Alpha of the Hale pack wrapped around him, his face in the crook of his neck and a hand on his waist. Somewhere in the back of his head, a shadow was lurking, something wrong was happening. But just for a few more hours he wanted to enjoy this safe space, just a little more. He fell back to sleep as he brushed his fingers on Derek’s chest.