#but at the same time she's crowley's genuine ally the only one

[beastsovrevelation]

Satan and Michael are siblings, alright?..

Neither sure pulls any punches.

[anassemblageofpassions]

The progression of sam and Rowena’s relationship is so so interesting to me, and such an interesting parallel to sam and ruby.

With sam and ruby we start off with her instantly allying herself with him, lying to him that she can save dean. With sam and rowena, we start off with them actively maligned before he eventually recruits her to help him save dean. But unlike ruby, where she effectively tethered him to her, got him dependent on her physically, mentally, emotionally, literally addicted to her, this time, sam won’t make the same mistake. He’ll chain rowena up, because he’s learned from ruby. And it’s so fascinating too, because sam and rowena have insane chemistry that doesn’t ever seem to become romantic, but it’s there. I don’t even think it was intentional on either of the actors’ parts, but it’s so apparent and fascinating.

And then. We have rowena manipulate sam this time, she helps lucifer in trapping him in the cage. She was every intention of being romantic with a Lucifer in Sam’s body. But like ruby, she’s ultimately being manipulated by Lucifer too, because lucifer never cared for demons, and he’ll never care for rowena either, because she’s too powerful. Just like sam was too powerful for him. Sam says no, and lucifer kills rowena. He spends the next season tormenting her and trying to use her, but she ends up beating him over and over again, just like sam did.

And then he kills her, brutally. Because he wants to regain some semblance of power that she’s taken from him, he wants to feel strong over her. And like sam, she chokes. She can’t fight. She freezes. So he chokes her, and he shows her his true face, something he’s likely only reserved for sam before. And then he burns her. Just like he would burn sam.

Rowena loses a piece of herself then. And so she seeks whatever power she can find. She doesn’t want to face sam because he knows, so she uses someone else to get what she needs, but then she has to face him because they run off on their own. And sam tries to talk about lucifer. But rowena immediately understands now. She is the first person to call what sam and Lucifer have an abusive relationship on-screen. She has experienced an inkling of what he’s been through, and she is traumatized and helpless.

They’re finally alone together. And their relationship changes forever. Because rowena finally opens up to the only person who could possibly understand her. Because no one else understands how dangerous lucifer is. Because lucifer is annoying to most people, violent sure, but most of the time, he’s just irritating. But sam and rowena know. For the first time in years, sam reveals a sliver of himself. Their dynamic is irrevocably transformed. Sam gives her the book page. He empowers her in a way ruby wouldnt empower him, because rubys dynamic was all about false empowerment that was really controlling him.

And then sam learns he will be the one to kill rowena. And rowena does too. The first person she has been vulnerable with in years is the one who is destined to be her downfall. She tries to kill him. She can’t bring herself to. Crowley’s death and Sam’s bond have changed her forever. They will never need to imprison her for help again.

Dean has the same misgivings about rowena that he did Ruby. But for once, Sam’s trust finally pays off. Dean allows him this relationship. Probably because he knows sam will be the one to kill her, so she’s no threat to their dynamic. Sam will never allow himself to bond with her the way he bonded with dean anyways.

But under her, sam begins to learn witchcraft, some he’d previously learned from ruby. But unlike ruby, she teaches him out of genuine care. She doesn’t view him as a deity, she isn’t manipulating him for anything. She just likes him, and he likes her. He’s her protege. He’s allowed to use his powers again in some capacity. Dean allows this.

But then, of course, he has to kill her. He does. For dean. But. In doing so, he will unwittingly appoint his own approved ruler of hell. A title he was destined for. A title, in a way, that ruby wanted him to take, he gave to rowena.

Lucifer transformed sam and Rowena’s dynamic. It saved them, in a way. Rowena started off manipulating him like ruby did to get him to say yes to lucifer, but she stuck around to experience the consequences. They fell in love, in a way, and had a relationship built on mutual respect and shared experiences. She’s one of the healthiest relationships he ever had. So much so that Dean had to begrudgingly approve her.

Ruby wouldn’t give up lucifer for sam. Rowena wouldn’t have either, until she suffered at his hands. She gave up her life to sam, even if it wasn’t for him. Dean stabbed Ruby, who destroyed sam. Sam stabbed rowena, who sam saved. Sam’s trust finally paid off and he still had to kill her.

[itsclydebitches]

I keep seeing people calling Good Omens queer bating and a I can't help but ask why? I read the Aziraphale/Crowley relationship threw an Ace lens and they are clearly as close to married as they are probably going to get without stepping on holy ground.... and they love each other... why is it considered queer bating?

Personally, I think it's mostly young queer fans turning legitimate grievances on the wrong target. A case of getting so fed up with queerbaiting in media as a whole that they're instinctually lashing out at anything that seems to resembles it on the surface, without taking the time to consider whether this is, in fact, the thing they're mad at. Good Omens is a scapegoat, if you will. The equivalent of snapping at your partner after a long day. Your friend was an asshole, your boss was an asshole, the guy in traffic was an asshole, and then you come home to your partner who says something teasing and you take it as another asshole comment because you've just been surrounded by assholeness all day, to the point where your brain is primed to see an attack. Your partner wasn't actually an asshole, but by this point you're (understandably) too on guard to realize that. Unless someone sits you down and kindly reminds you of the difference between playful teasing and a legitimate insult - the nuance, if you will - your hackles are just gonna stay up and you'll leave the room, off to phone a different friend to tell them all about how your partner was definitely an asshole to you.

Only in this case, that "friend" is a fan on social media doing think pieces on the supposed queerbaiting of Good Omens, spreading that idea to a) people who aren't familiar with the show themselves and b) those who, like that original fan, have come to expect queerbaiting and thus aren't inclined to question the latest story with that mark leveled against it. Because on the surface Good Omens can look a lot like queerbaiting. Here are two queer coded characters who clearly love each other, but don't say "I love you," don't kiss, don't "prove" that love in a particular way. So Gaiman is just leading everyone on, right?

Well... no. This is where the nuance comes in, the thing that many fans aren't interested in grappling with (because, like it or not, media is not made up of black and white categories; queerbaited and not-queerbaited. Supernatural's finale is proof enough of that...) I won't delve into the most detailed explanation here, but suffice to say:

Gaiman has straight up said it's a love story. He's just not giving them concrete labels like "gay" or "bi" or "asexual," etc. because they are literally not human. Gaiman has subscribed to an inclusive viewpoint in an era where fans are desperate for unambiguous rep that homophobes cannot possibly deny. The freedom to prioritize any interpretation - yes, including a "just friends" interpretation - now, in 2021, feels like a cop-out. However, in this case it's an act of world building (they are an angel and a demon, not bound by human understanding of identity) meeting a genuine desire to make these characters relatable to the entire queer community, not just particular subsets. Gaiman has said they can be whatever we want because the gender, sexuality, and romantic attraction of an angel and a demon is totally up for debate! However, some fans have interpreted that as a dismissal of canonical queerness; the idea that fans can pretend they're whatever they want... but it's definitely not canon. It is though. Them being queer is 100% canon, it's just up to us to decide what kind of queer they are. This isn't Gaiman stringing audiences along, it's him opening the relationship up to all queer possibilities.

We know he's not stringing us along (queerbaiting) because up until just a few days ago season two didn't exist. Queerbaiting is a deliberate strategy to maintain an audience. A miniseries does not need to maintain its audience. You binge it in one go and you're done, no coming back next year required. The announcement for season two doesn't erase that context for season one. No one knew there would be more content and thus the idea that they would implement a strategy designed to keep viewers hooked due to the hope for a queer relationship (with no intent to follow through) is... silly.

In addition, this interpretive, queer relationship between Crowley and Aziraphale existed in the book thirty years ago. Many fans are not considering the difference between creating a totally new story in 2019 and faithfully adapting a story from 1990 in 2019. Good Omens as representation meant something very different back then and that absolutely impacts how we see its adaptation onto the small screen. To put this into perspective, Rowling made HUGE waves when she revealed that she "thought of" Dumbledore as gay in an interview... in 2007. Compare that to the intense coding 17 years before. Gaiman was - and still is - pushing boundaries.

Which includes being an established ally, particularly in his comics. Queerbaiting isn't just the act of a single work, but the way an author approaches their work. Gaiman does not (to my knowledge) have that mark against him and even if he did, he's done enough other work to offset that.

Finally, we've got other, practical issues like: how do you represent asexuality on the screen? How do you show an absence of something? Yeah, one or both of them could claim that label in the show, outright saying, "I'm asexual," but again, Gaimain isn't looking to box his mythological figures into a single identity. So if we want that rep... we have to grapple with the fact that this is one option for what it looks like.

Even if he did want to narrow the representation down to just a few identities for the show, should Gaiman really be making those major changes when he's only one half of the author team? Pratchett has, sadly, passed on and thus obviously has no say in whether his characters undergo such revisions. Even if fans hate every other argument, they should understand that, out of respect, Good Omens is going to largely remain the same story it was 30 years ago.

And those 6,000 years are just the beginning! Again, this was meant to be a miniseries of a single novel, a novel that, crucially, covered only Crowley and Aziraphale's triumph in being able to love one another freely. That's a part of their personal journey. Yeah, they've been together in one sense for 6,000 years, but that was always with hell and heaven on their backs, to say nothing of the slow-burn approach towards acknowledging that love, for Aziraphale in particular. We end the story at the start of their new relationship, one that is more free and open than it ever was before. They can be anything to one another now! The fact that we don't see that isn't a deliberate attempt on the author's part to deny us that representation, but only a result of the story ending.

So yeah, there's a lot to consider and, frankly, I don't think those fans are considering it. Which on a purely emotional level I can understand. I'm pissed about queerbaiting too and the knee-jerk desire to reject anything that doesn't meet a specific standard is understandable. But understandable doesn't mean we don't have to work against that instinct because doing otherwise is harmful in the long run. We need to consider when stories were published and what representation meant back then. We need to consider how we adapt those stories for a modern audience. We need to acknowledge that if we want the inclusivity that "queer" provides us, that includes getting characters whose identity is not strictly defined by the author as well as characters with overtly canonical labels. We need both. We likewise need to be careful about when having higher standards ends up hurting the wrong authors - who are our imperfect allies vs. those straight up unwilling to embrace our community at all? And most importantly, we have to think about how we're using the terms we've developed to discuss these issues. Queerbaiting means something specific and applying it to Good Omens not only does Good Omens a disservice, but it undermines the intended meaning of "queerbaiting," making it harder to use correctly in the future. Good Omens is not queerbaiting and trying to claim it is only hurts the community those fans are speaking up for.

[castielmacleod]

I hate the fact that we crowley apologists have to hold onto such minor scenes because crowley gets almost no physical and or verbal affection!! I was literally hollering the first time I saw that scene where crowley gets a back massage from another demon and that wasn’t even genuine. She was just another lackey who didn’t care about him, more so about his power. Crowley deserves to receive the love he desperately wanted before he died.

I knowwwwwww it’s genuinely so sad…. like Cas gets some really good movie hugs at least, but Crowley? Quite literally no one ever touches him kindly while also meaning it, with the sole exception of Gwen Hernandez bless her soul but you can see how completely unused to genuine affection Crowley is when she does that and it’s so sad. I remember being so excited that Crowley finally had an ally when Simmons helped him escape from Lucifer, but then it turned out she hated Crowley all along. Even Rowena giving him a kiss on the forehead was enough for him to let her into the inner folds of his court. He is starved for affection and then just. Never gets any. And worse, it gets used against him (like Sam using that recording of Dean begging for help to lure Crowley to his death, that was fucked up tbh)

Especially after he cried about just wanting to be loved….. they wrote that and proceeded to make sure no one loved him ever for the rest of his time on the show. It’s so deeply upsetting to me and a testament to just how bad this show is that they would set up that arc and then only use it to let Crowley become more and more depressed until he becomes literally suicidal.

Right up to his last episode too. I always thought it was insane how in the same episode that he digs himself out of a grave he also commits suicide, but like he sincerely got pushed over the edge by the Winchesters’ treatment of him. They were his last chance, he wanted to help them, close hell for them, but when he shows up all he gets is punched by Dean, yelled at, then stabbed. Next thing he does is show up with a spell he can kill himself for. And then even THAT sacrifice gets significantly overshadowed by Cas getting killed ten seconds later. It’s so objectively unfair to an lgbt character who was a main character for eight seasons imo.

But yeah it’s just… all he wanted was to be loved and for some reason the writers decided to just have him get treated like shit no matter how hard he tried, because idk, they think that’s compelling storytelling for some reason? Like… screenshots where he’s in the apocalypse world or whatever with that bandage around his hand just break my heart. He had to do that himself while deciding to commit suicide. What the fuck.

[poisonepel]

Chemistry Between the Dorm Leaders and a Hero-Inspired S/O— (pt.1)

After that Snow White request, I had a small idea... so here are headcanons for each dorm leader with an s/o inspired by the heroes of their respective films. I had some hesitation with both Vil and Leona, since their heroes are the Evil Queen’s stepdaughter and Scar’s nephew respectively... I could get past the Snow White one bc Vil’s so different from the Evil Queen, but the Simba one weirded me out too much ;; so I substituted him for Nala. Sorry !!

Of course, this is disregarding the original characters’ ages and assuming they’re all students at Night Raven, in the same dorm as their villain. Please let me know if there’s a problem with anything though !!

Idia, Leona, and Malleus will come in a second post.

Riddle & Alice

I remember Alice as a bratty, opinionated girl who is dissatisfied with her normal life and prefers to escape to her imagination. Very stubborn, but also very sensible. Pairing these traits with Riddle’s hotheadedness and severe need to keep things under his command, I don’t think they would make a very good match. Alice constantly rolls her eyes at all of his decisions, and blatantly refuses to listen to him if she doesn’t agree with what he says.

It would be extremely difficult for these two to even tolerate each other. Alice sticks out to Riddle because she’s the only one who doesn’t fear him—but that might not be a good thing. He develops a “You will fear me, you will obey me” type mindset, to which she responds with an unimpressed, “Oh, really?”

Riddle gets so fed up with her that he marches down to Headmaster Crowley and demands that Alice be relocated to a different dorm—“She’d be great for Pomefiore, with all the other stuck-ups.” (Dire says no).

As much as she loathes Riddle though, Alice might enjoy some of his nonsensical rules. She hates boring things like order and routine, instead craving the thrill of things unique and unpredictable. Riddle is taken aback when one day she exclaims how much fun she’s having during one of his sudden events, which had annoyed and tired out everyone else. He’s not sure how to react.

He spends a long time thinking about this, and then curiosity gets the better of him; he tries to experiment to see if he can do anything else that doesn’t make her turn her nose up at him. So basically, this is his odd way of figuring out her interests - and he realizes she’s not just automatically appalled by everything he does; she’s simply very opinionated. He might even start to appreciate the fact that she’s got such a strong grip of her views and morals.

It takes much longer for Alice to fall in love with Riddle, though. She has such a great distaste for him that there’s no way she’ll even consider falling in love with him. She would have to catch him in a vulnerable state to realize there’s more to him than simply yelling at everyone all the time - maybe when he’s stressed from school, or sleeping, or witnessing him experiencing true happiness (perhaps with his friends? does he even have friends?) And then she, too, having a natural curiosity, might try to learn more about him.

Tbh, the only thing that might help bring them together is the fact that both of them are way too nosy for their own good.

Azul & Ariel

Like Alice, Ariel is very curious, stubborn, and determined, but she can be a little gullible and naive at times. She’s been sheltered her whole life and Night Raven is the first time she’s been away from home for so long. Azul, on the other hand, is very independent; he’s somewhat of an information broker, good at observing people and seeing what makes them tick - and also swindling what he wants out of them. Naive little Ariel makes a perfect target.

Azul is very gentlemanly and polite, enticing and friendly, so Ariel is immediately swayed. She pretty much falls into the honeymoon phase with him straight away, but not truly in love; she’s just excited to be socializing with a nice boy.

It’s easy for Azul to trap her in a deceptive contract with ambiguous conditions. He doesn’t have any personal interest in her initially, but Ariel responds to his betrayal with vigor and goes above and beyond in trying to void the contract. It is only here that Azul starts taking more of an interest in her, since she’s now causing problems for him and therefore in the way.

But, even he has to appreciate her fierce determination to get out of this contract. He even stops at one point to consider why he’s been trying so hard to prevent her from getting out of it; Ariel is nothing but sweet and pure, so why is he so intent on inconveniencing her? He tries to convince himself that his original mindset is the same as it was before: Ariel was unable to pay the price he had set. Perhaps under misleading terms, but it’s her fault for not reading the contract carefully enough - therefore he can’t give her any leeway until he’s collected his payment. Even so, a part of him feels regretful.

However, Ariel has developed a (rightfully) bitter attitude towards Azul, and even though he understands why, it still leaves a sour taste in his mouth. Witnessing how beautiful of a personality she has has made him rethink his whole view of her - and a part of him wishes they were on better terms.

If Azul was serious about remedying their relationship, it would take a serious amount of effort on his part to regain her trust. Ariel can be naive, but she’s not stupid; and she’s already established that Azul is not an ally. But, in the case that he is able to prove himself to her, then the same elation she had when she first met him would resurface.

For their relationship to work, Azul would need to be the one who’s most committed. He already has a personality Ariel would immediately grow infatuated with, so it really depends on him being able to truly become someone she can trust and rely on - and make sure she knows that too.

Kalim & Aladdin

These two are hopeless idiots together. They come from vastly different backgrounds: while Kalim grew up with basically everything handed to him on a silver platter, Aladdin comes from a poor family and barely scraped by in his youth. They share a common resourcefulness, though, as they both are very talented at making do with whatever situation they’ve landed in (but, Kalim always has the advantage of wealth and power).

While Aladdin might be initially turned off by Kalim’s extravagant wastefulness, he also admires it greatly; much like his canon love for Jasmine, he is struck by beauty and wealth and only dreams about what it might be like to live with such greatness. This overpowers his slight aversion for him.

It’s easy for Kalim and Aladdin to become friends. Aladdin is funny and bright, with a knack for socializing since he’s come across so many people from being in such open, unstable living conditions before. Overall, he’s just very easy to slide into conversation with and feel like you’ve known him forever. Kalim is also very extroverted, but in more of a you-will-pay-attention-to-me-now forceful kind of way. Like Jamil, Aladdin is one of the few people who doesn’t tire out from Kalim’s constant energy & semi-sheltered mindset.

Once they find out their shared extroversion is very compatible, Kamil and Aladdin talk nonstop. Aladdin is a natural storyteller, and loves sharing about all his experiences from his childhood. He had to be very independent and willing to defy authorities in order to secure his survival, while also helping all the other orphans and street rats obtain food and shelter as much as he could. Kalim finds this extremely admirable. To him, Aladdin is almost like a literal prince - he rose from nothing and now is thriving at the prestigious Night Raven College. Also, he seems to have turned out fairly normal for someone who suffered so many hardships as a child.

But evidently, the closer the get, the more Kalim realizes Aladdin is not as normal as he makes himself out to be. His traumas from his youth have and are still affecting him, and once Kalim sees this different, more somber side of Aladdin, he becomes desperate to help him any way he can. He first takes him on a “date.” This isn’t meant to be romantic, just a nice all-expenses-paid trip to give Aladdin something nice.

Jamil is surprised because this is the first time Kalim has ever thought about anyone other than himself. But then, once the “dates” keep happening, Jamil realizes there’s more between them than just Kalim “being nice.” Things might escalate between them both, and while the final trigger for Aladdin was Kalim’s little acts of kindness, there had been something clear between them since the beginning.

Vil & Snow White

This sort of piggybacks off the headcanons I wrote here.

Snow White is sweet and pure of heart, a girl who doesn’t fully realize when someone might be taking advantage of her. She is gentle and sweet when she talks to you, but also doesn’t mind keeping to herself for long periods of time. On the other hand, Vil is vain and proud, constantly needs attention, and keeps his own appearance as his top priority. He always makes sure his connections are up to his own beauty standards too, and if Snow White enters his social circle, this includes her. Fortunately, there’s not much for him to do, because she is already extremely beautiful.

Vil takes interest in her because of her beauty. He feels a bit threatened by it in the beginning, but every time he talks to her, she always, always acts like the nicest, most genuine human being he’d ever met. He gets a little frustrated because he wants to hate her for being so much more beautiful than him, but she’s so ridiculously precious.

Snow White doesn’t mind Vil much. Like with everyone, it’s basically impossible for her to view him in a bad light, and she respects him as Pomefiore’s dorm leader. That being said, he’s not a major interest for her - she has a very tight-knit circle of 3 or 4 girl friends who she spends most of her time with.

Their interactions are usually initiated by Vil. Half the time, it’s because he can’t understand how she’s so nice all the time, so he tries to draw out a negative reaction from her.

But with enough time spent together, the opposite effect happens. Snow White develops a small crush on him. She starts getting flustered whenever he talks to her, and even more fidgety and precious - and even more, starts picking up his little mannerisms and habits. She sometimes points out whenever she notices something’s changed in his appearance.

Then, it’s Vil’s turn to feel flustered. She noticed. She notices whenever he does his hair differently, or when he paints his nails a new color, or when he wears a new arrangement of jewelry. He’s taken aback when his own heart starts fluttering whenever he’s around her, and soon he drops his mission to find fault with her and refocuses his attention on trying to avoid her. He has no time for falling in love.

But now Snow White is the one nervously trying to get his attention. And he's fallen so head over heels for her, he can’t not interact with her - and would feel too bad if he was mean to her. For a while, there’s a lot of tension between them, and Vil feels hideously awkward. He hates it. So he tries to finally confess, as slyly as he can.

Snow White isn’t very good at reading between the lines, but Vil isn’t very good at being subtle when he’s struck by so much emotion - so their feelings for each other come to light very quickly. There isn’t much verbal communication between them when they “confess,” though - Snow is too shy and Vil can’t admit anything unless he’s not being serious. But, if they do establish that they love each other, their relationship would be stable and warm from both parties.

[wanna-b-poet31]

Aziraphale Addresses His Abuse

In case anyone cares, here are some more musings about the significance of Aziraphale’s confrontation of his abuse in Good Omens. This is an extension of a segment in my longer piece: An Angel in Recovery

Needing Closure

After Aziraphale finally admits that Heaven is like an abusive parent, he needs to come to terms with the fact that he’s got >ALOT< of shit to deal with. Not least of which is his internalized self-loathing as evident in the above gif where we can see his association with “soft” as a negative trait.  And we all KNOW Crowley would fight Gabriel for personally helping to instill the belief that he’s a “bad angel” for being kind and compassionate, and loving humanity >and Crowley<.

But, choosing a side is not closure.

What it is, is a support system and a promise to help build up Aziraphale’s confidence. Choosing his side provides safety, and it strengthens his relationship with Crowley, but choosing Crowley alone will not address his underlining trauma. While he now acknowledges that his 6000-year treatment is fucked up (like really fucked up), it is but only one step on his journey towards recovery.

Once Aziraphale chooses Crowley, to be his partner, to stop Armageddon, to defend humanity, he indeed realizes that the line between Heaven’s abuse and the threat of Hell’s is a fucking thin one. Both adversaries team up to actively destroy everything the Ineffable Husbands love, employing gaslighting, physical attacks, or emotional traumatizations to achieve their goals.

In order to have the closure that he desperately needs to properly cope with his trauma, he needs to confront his abusers and reclaim his sense of self, reaffirming his choices to pick the healthy support system that is Crowley.

There are four distinct moments where he gets his closure: With Heaven, With Shadwell, with Gabriel, and finally, with Hell. 

Defying Heaven

I didn’t note this before, but Aziraphale’s first direct act of defiance is to his duties as a leader of Heaven. 

After Aziraphale has picked a side, he is...inconveniently discorporated...and sent into the den of lions that is Heaven. Now, having realized that no one in Heaven has Earth’s best interests at heart, he walks in with his eyes wide open to the abuse and unhealthy nature of Heaven.  Once he is face-to-face with his “duties” as an Angel thrust upon him. And how is he, a principality, an angel of heaven, treated? 

Like dirt.

The Quartermaster >yup weird mustache guy is named “quartermaster”< berates him for losing his body (that up until that point had never been discorporated before) and being a “pathetic excuse for angel”. The verbal abuse is strong in this scene because, as the above gif shows, Aziraphale flinches at his words, visibly becoming uncomfortable with the treatment. And, instead of denying the problem or repressing his feelings, he sees Heaven for the nasty “parent” that it is. 

And then we see Aziraphale finally. fucking. snap.

For the first, but not the last, time we see Aziraphale assert his own desires to heaven. Although in the garden he clearly asserts his desires and kindness by giving Eve and Adam his sword, he lies about where it’s been to both God and Gabriel. He does not lie here. He makes a choice and he does not back down. He deflects blame somewhat, but he admits that the sword is gone, and righteously asserts that his actions were just. 

When the Quartermaster yells abuse at him, then tries to control Aziraphale, promising to overlook his “indiscretion” if he gets in line “now”, Aziraphale fumbles for a second but then comes out in full force. 

He. says. no. 

Not only that, he tells Heaven, on no uncertain terms, that he wants no part in waging war against humanity or Hell. This act of agency defies the hold Heaven has on him, and where, in the past, he would have suffocated on his own repression instead of acknowledging Heaven’s actions as wrong, he won’t be silent any longer. Heaven isn’t used to being told they’re in the wrong, and it lends to their overall power over all angels. But, Aziraphale does it anyway, knowing full well what the consequences are if they retaliate.

But, he’s chosen his side and damn it all if they think he’s not going to see it through until the end. 

Instead of denying there’s a problem with Heaven’s behavior, he demands to be returned to Earth so he can call/contact Crowley and stop the war from starting in the first place. Finally!!! His own wants and needs above the toxic, controlling parent that is Heaven. 

And more than that, he tells Heaven the truth. Up until this point he had repressed his misgivings about Heaven’s actions, lying through his teeth to Heaven about his true feelings towards humanity.  But here, when faced with an ultimatum, he tells the truth and DEMANDS to be sent back to Earth. 

Heaven, it seems, now is not worth the effort. He has a support system he trusts implicitly and without question -- Crowley. The control Heaven used to have on him has been replaced with defiance and anger because of their cruelty to him, to Crowley, and to humanity.  

He has some closure!

Handling Homophobia 

Then there is Shadwell.  

So full disclosure. I haven’t really talked about Shadwell in many of my metas because of all of the abusers in Good Omens, I'm most triggered by his homophobic behaviors. I grew up closeted and queer around people like Shadwell (although they were admittedly less dooms-day focused). I have some family like him and his constant usage of homophobic slurs towards Aziraphale hits close to home.  Sorry if this isn’t as detailed as my other sections, disregarding Shadwell is a form of self-care. 

It is clear with his introduction that Shadwell is dismissive of most people. For example, he elects to call Tracy “Jezebel” and other derogatory terms for her profession, only treating her kindly after she retires. For Aziraphale, he calls him “Southern Pansy”, which is a major slur in the UK for gay men.

With Crowley, Shadwell is less brash. Sure he still fanatical about abusing witches, and wants to milk the situation for as much money as he possibly can, but when he approaches Crowley at the diner, he speaks with a kind of timidness that looks like he’s seeking validation for his actions. I assert this because he’s not scared of Crowley but genuinely sees him as an ally. While it could just be a ploy to get more money out of Crowley, he doesn’t talk back or insult Crowley around him.

However, I firmly believe Crowley would absolutely beat the shit out of Shadwell for his treatment of Aziraphale.

When we look closely at how Shadwell talks to Aziraphale, he is clearly directly manipulative and verbally abusive. He purposefully takes advantage of Aziraphale’s kindness to better line his own pockets by falsely reporting the existence and death of his “soldiers”. Then, out of earshot, he berates Aziraphale for what he presumes his sexual identity is. While Aziraphale is canonically a queer masculine-presenting non-binary entity, Shadwell percieves Aziraphale’s behavior as a net negative (which it absolutely isn’t!!! Fuck Shadwell’s transphobia and homophobia). He uses his prejudice and homophobia to show that he does not view Aziraphale as worth the same respect that Crowley (who somehow Shadwell does not read as genderqueer) is shown.

Shadwell’s abuse is less all-encompassing than Heaven’s, but it’s just as significant because of his dismissive attitude towards Aziraphale devaluing non-normative gender presentations and is generally meant to be hurtful. He is meant to be Aziraphale’s ally, or perhaps his employee. But the homophobic slurs shows malice. Although not as hidden as Heaven, the abusive nature of Shadwell is just as damaging, and the insult is intended to belittle and demean Aziraphale.

This all comes to a head after finding Madame Tracy is angelically possessed by Aziraphale, Shadwell verbally attacks Aziraphale with the slur again. And Aziraphale, who just faced Heaven and walked backward into Hell, is not having any of the homophobic behaviors. 

This whole interaction is a relatively “small” moment compared to his defiance of Heaven, but it shows he’s one step closer to confronting the bigger, more direct, abusers in his life. Defying Heaven was monumental but vague, it’s one thing to defy an organization, or even defy expectations, but to defy individuals is harder, more personal, and confronting the struggle helps give Aziraphale closure against homophobia.  

The One Where Gabriel’s a Dick

The next confrontation is with Gabriel, the primary abuser for 6000 years. While all of Heaven is abusive, Gabriel specifically singles out Aziraphale, belittles his interests (even when Gabriel himself indulges in some less than angelic behaviors like wrath and indulging in nice, expensive human clothing). He is a vehicle for many of the specific actions that traumatize Aziraphale.  

Although I don’t doubt Aziraphale could cut Gabriel with his flaming sword, the most powerful weapon in his arsenal is his words. He defends Adam’s choice to not destroy the world and confronts Gabriel’s use of the “great plan” vs. the ineffable one. Aziraphale knows that poking at Heaven’s excuse for destroying humanity won’t hold up. Adam’s right, there is no rationale for waging war except “to see whose gang’s the best”. Speaking up like that, against a director of war, is ballsy, but Aziraphale does not care. He needs to confront the horrendous way Gabriel/Heaven has treated him, humanity, and Crowley.

And who supports him through this cathartic moment? 

Crowley. 

With a single glance, Crowley interjects and comes through, supporting Aziraphale’s (extremely clever) plan to protect Adam and the world. Based on Gabriel and Beelzebub’s confused reactions Crowley realizes Heaven and Hell don’t actually know what they’re doing.  Aziraphale has them dead to right with his cleverness and devotion to humanity. Stepping closer to Aziraphale, protectively behind Adam, he pushes until Heaven and Hell are forced to admit defeat.

It’s a beautiful confrontation. A perfect FUCKKKKKKK YOU to the embodiment of his abuse, with his support system helping give him the confidence he needs to push past his insecurities and execute his plan. 

Facing His Fears: Hell or Highwater 

The last distinct moment is the switch. 

While Hell specifically hasn’t actually targetted Aziraphale, they have done something worse. Attacked his support system. So, Aziraphale returns in kind, confronting his partner’s abusers head on. And look at the absolute GLEE he takes in showing off how indestructible to Holy Water his partner is. He’s making a performance of daring all of Hell to come after them, terrorizing them like they terrorized Crowley and him.

It’s also him coming to terms with the fact that yes, it’s him and Crowley against the (divine) World. The switch is so significant for so many reasons, but the primary one is that it allows Aziraphale the ability to face his biggest fear -- Hell -- and not flinch. 

The Threat of falling (like from Uriel/Michael/Sandalphon) and going to Hell terrifies our loveable bastard angel. He knew that he was disposable to Heaven, but he’s indisposable to Crowley. This confrontation allows him to come to terms with the unhealthy power dynamic of Heaven and begin the rest of his life with Crowley as equals. 

Once he returns home, to Crowley, he’s not fully recovered (recovery is a process, not a finish line) but he’s faced all of his abusers.  

He has closure. 

TLDR: Aziraphale is on the road to recovery with Crowley. #lovewins

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

[eisforeidolon]

Episode: The Rupture

So I'm off to a cranky start with this one before the episode even properly kicks in.  These writers think the audience's memory for canon is just as shitty as theirs, so they feel it's necessary to outright spoil Rowena's death via the content of the previouslies.  Let literally anything come as a surprise in this show anymore?  Can't let it happen!

There's like, the one scene where Dean is trying to make Sam feel better about Rowena … and that's about all I wholeheartedly enjoyed from this episode.  Well, beyond the usual of the actors doing their best with what they were given no matter how dumb it was.  Such a talented cast to waste on ... this.

I think the writers were trying to do an in media res type start here, with them already on the way to try a new thing?  The problem is, like so much else in the show now, it feels like a no-effort cheat because we didn’t see them work for it or even get an implication they did.  Oh, they had literally no idea what to try next last episode and made it out to be a big deal?  No problem, they pulled a spell out of Rowena's ass and came up with a plan to implement it since last we looked.  Even ending the last episode with Rowena saying something along the lines of, “I just might have an idea” would make this work so much better for me.

And seriously are they out of money to pay extras and get new sets?  The group makes their way through the ghost-infested area without a single sign of any angry ghosts until they're in the same old crypt where the show can have “ghosts” bang on the door without having to show any people-shapes. 

Rowena declaring they're all going to die would have a lot more impact if significantly more people actually stayed dead on this show for more than a hot minute these days.  I admit I found Rowena's meltdown a little over the top, but then again, that is a little unfair because I think it makes sense for the character to be so.  She's both generally inclined towards dramatics and used to being able to cut and run when shit doesn't go her way, but with allies she actually cares about and the whole world in danger, that's not really an option.  Understandably distressing.  

Then we have Dean yelling at Rowena and angrily stocking up on bullets to again, fucking futilely shoot at the ghosts because … oh, right.  This episode was written by Berens who seems to think Dean is nothing but an idiotic angry bully.  Die mad nobody wanted to watch your shitty cardboard MarySuefest, you little bitch. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Oh, no!  Sam is out of ideas!  Remind me what ideas he actually had? Like, I'm not digging at Sam, I'm digging at the stupidity of that line and that I suspect this season is going to give me whiplash with the Winchester hokey pokey of angsty fatalism.  I genuinely think it makes sense for Sam and Dean to alternately bolster each other when the other one starts to lose hope.  However, when they seem to switch randomly at the drop of a hat, it feels more like drama for the sake of drama rather than being particularly realistic or interesting.

Since the spell Rowena arbitrarily pulled out of her ass didn't work, now it's time for an equally arbitrary McGuffin to come up!  Yay.  That said, I am actually willing to give a bit of a pass on this one. While it's absolutely absurd that Lilith would have needed an item to control demons (controlling demons was not a problem until the writers were desperately out of ideas of what to do with Crowley)? If the actual purpose is to suck up the power of all those demons, I can buy Lilith having a device for that.  (Although what was demon guy gonna do if Rowena’s first spell had worked, since the crook thing only calls souls/demons back from Earth? Edit: They go with his plan because they’re desperate, they’re unlikely to agree to a dubious demon scheme if the ghosts are no longer on the verge of breaking free.)

Oh, and can't forget, there's also another spell!  Because apparently in coming up with the first one, it was in no way necessary nor did it apparently seem like a good idea to actually inspect the ghost-belching hell-hole.  Uh-huh.

Then we have the part where Sam is apparently witch-like now, because ??? I really don't need Dabb's crew of morons trying to turn Sam into as much of a joke as Wayward/Jack with random abilities falling out his ass.  Both Winchesters have cast minor spells all along, just say Rowena likes him better since that's true enough.  That would involve not taking any given opportunity to arbitrarily make random shit up, though, and these writers can't have that!

It's almost funny how hard they try to talk up Dean's part in this, which is to sit by a hole with a bag and toss it in.  Oooh, so dangerous! Except for the part where we see later that there was literally no danger because the ghosts completely ignored him.  Aside from that one line about Chuck being a glorified fanboy, why is Dean even in this episode?

Though at least that's not as pathetic as Castiel's dirty diaper faces. This is about saving the world, you giant baby - you're older than humanity, grow the fuck up. Seriously, do the writers genuinely believe the repeat of Castiel getting talked into being a dumb asshole by some rando is sympathetic?  It's really, really not, because all I'm hearing is a bunch of undeserved self-pity seasoned with a hefty dash of hypocrisy.  

Almost as annoying is wasting our time with the bullshit of Ketch's death. Look, I really don't care that he's dead.  He should have stayed dead the first time.  What I can't stand is that these writers are so nonsensically obsessed with “redeeming” antagonist/villain characters by having them change who they are for absolutely no reason so they can have a “heroic” death.  And this was sloppier and more transparent that most.  Oh, the demon can conveniently read Ketch's totally genuine noble intentions, alas, so sad he dies! Don’t try to tell me that actual, in-character Ketch wouldn’t at least try to pretend to sell them out to outmaneuver random demon #7692.  The only way I’d buy this is if he has another get-out-of-death-free spell of Rowena’s in play - and I don’t actually want any more unnecessary resurrections so I also hope that’s not the case.

And why bring that other demon into things, you ask?  So we can have a brief demonic power play, with demons fighting over ruling hell. Because that is in no way stale as fuck.  I guess the idea is that it needs to be there so demon guy reveals his master plan in front of Cas (and it has to be spelled out that blatantly because the writers see both the audience and Cas as idiots)?  Except, seriously?  A demon screwing them all over for power? What a completely unexpected turn of events!  Not to mention that I agree Cas' choice here is, as per usual, highly questionable.  Allowing demon guy to suck in all the souls at least gets those souls off Earth.  No matter how powerful it makes him, he's still very much a tertiary concern beyond all of hell's souls getting free to wreak havoc on the whole world and Chuck turning against them. Which is assuming that they actually couldn't have worked with him as the power in hell.  Not like it would be the first time - he may have immediately turned on them, but he also may not have.  If they wanted this to look like it was about Castiel making the smart decision, they really shouldn’t have spent so much time showing him whining and sulking.  As it is, this takes on the implication it’s at least as much about Castiel seizing the first opportunity to take out demon guy for using Jack’s body and not caring about his feeewings as it is about making a necessary or prudent decision.  Not exactly a great look.

There is no connection between Lilith's crook and Rowena's spell to heal the not-a-door-totally-a-wound hell-hole, right?  One is from demon guy’s secret plotting, the other is entirely from Rowena.  She's also not doing the same spell she was before where she couldn't finish it because the ghosts were bangin' on the forcefield thing.  So after Castiel kills the demon guy and stops the soul-suckage … why can't they just finish sealing the hole to stopper up more ghosts coming through and then deal with what's already there?  See if the solidify-the-shield thing can be done now with less ghosties or just use moar crystals?  The jump from something’s gone wrong to, whelp, time to self-sacrifice is extremely fast and unless I missed/forgot something, not an automatic conclusion to come to.

This is why I suspect maybe the meta I've seen hypothesizing Rowena was up to something may be true.  When Sam asks her if she has any ideas earlier in the episode, they show her looking at a page in the damned book and quickly closing it to say no with this weird little music stinger in the background.  If this isn't a fake-out where she makes this “sacrifice” to get the power and takes over hell instead of demon guy, it's just disappointingly bad melodrama that, so far as I can see, has to happen because the script says so. (She wouldn’t even need to have been relying on demon guy’s failure if she just was considering doing it instead of planning on it and then seized the opportunity when Cas killed demon guy.)

When are Castiel's powers not fucking failing?  Seriously.  Again, more Castiel is a sad sack of sorrow and I cannot be bothered to give a fuck.  You want people to trust you and give you the benefit of the doubt?  Maybe stop betraying them and constantly failing to follow through for them - just a thought.

[nellie-elizabeth]

Supernatural: Raising Hell (15x02)

I swear, every time I see Buckleming's names attached to an episode of Supernatural, I try to keep an open mind. I try to believe that they'll pull out a decent episode, which on occasion, they have managed to do. But this one... Gosh. I don't even know where to start.

Cons:

So crowded! Always with the so, so crowded! There are so many things going on in this one episode that it's like I can't even catch my breath. And I do not mean that in a good way. We've got Rowena, we've got Kevin, we've got Ketch, Amara... all of these reappearances should have been really fun to see, but instead they are all so jumbled up and very few of the moments actually have the impact they should.

A main example of this is Kevin. What a lackluster return for such a beloved character! He's there, the boys are glad to see him, he depressingly leaves because apparently he can't get into Heaven since he's been in Hell this whole time. So that's... sad, and pointless. We find out in this episode that all this time, when we thought Kevin was at peace in Heaven, he's actually been in Hell because... Chuck is a dick, I guess? There's no explanation given for why God put Kevin in Hell. And now he's here, he's used as bait, and he decides to leave and wander the earth as a ghost because it's better than going back to Hell. Why would you bring back a fan favorite just to make his ending much sadder?

Also, Ketch and Rowena's sexual tension thing was so uncomfortable. This is part of another big problem I have with Buckleming episodes. Their dialogue is just bad. Not always, not every line, but there are enough awkward, stilted moments to make me cringe. All of the stuff with Rowena and Ketch was like that. There were clumsy exposition moments, and things that should have felt fraught and emotional, like the boys' reunion with Kevin, fell extremely flat. There are exceptions to this, and I'll talk about them in a moment, but for the most part even the stuff in this episode that would have worked, came across as much less than it should have.

And that's just an overall issue with this episode and others like it. So much happens, and as individual pieces, there's a great deal of potential here. But when it's all crammed together, it can't make a whole as strong as its parts.

Pros:

There are exceptions to what I've been saying above. Basically, the only things I can praise about this episode are little snippets, moments in the chaos that cut through the overcrowded and yet still lackluster totality.

Let's start with Chuck and Amara. I love that we're seeing a more human-ish side to Amara, which makes sense if she's been spending time in the human world, playing craps and getting massages in Reno. Chuck is hanging around because he's not at full strength, and Amara, when she realizes that he just needs her because he's hurt, decides to ditch him. It was cool to see her being a bad-ass who isn't about to stick around and take care of little bro. Chuck as a villain works so well, because we can now see every benevolent action he's ever taken over the years as just part of his game. He liked the Winchesters because they were interesting, because they did what he wanted and kept him entertained. Now, for the first time, he's in a weakened position and he truly doesn't have control. It seems clear he wants to write this world off and move on, but he's not at full strength, and Amara is his only hope. I'd love to see more of her, as she might be the solution to the need for an all-powerful being to help our heroes in their fight against God.

We see a brief moment where Sam and Chuck appear to still be linked through their injury. This is leading me to the natural (and devastating) conclusion that Sam will need to die in order to defeat Chuck, the ultimate Big Bad. We'll see if Supernatural decides to go the tragedy route. I really hope they don't, but in any case, I'm up for the angst along the way. We see that Dean is still tracking Sam's injury, and Sam is trying to brush it off as no big deal. Oh, this is going to hurt so good.

While I have many, many problems with the way Rowena was written in this episode, I continue to find the interplay between her and the Winchesters fascinating. These actors do a masterful job of conveying the complexity of their friendship in small moments, even when the script itself does not substantiate the relationship much. Dean and Rowena share a look of understanding and respect as the episode ends. Sam and Dean both seem genuinely grateful to see her, and it's telling in and of itself that she showed up to assist. Her ally-ship with the Winchesters is in some ways a lot more interesting than Crowley's relationship with them was in the later years. She's not still pretending to be their enemy, and yet of course she's not just their buddy with no complicating factors involved.

The same can actually be said for Ketch. So much about the British Men of Letters plot line was botched a few seasons back, but Ketch came out of it as a somewhat interesting relic. I like that he and Dean have this weird yet natural-seeming camaraderie. Dean was willing to shoot him when he was possessed, and Ketch doesn't seem to have hard feelings about that at all. They're just... like that. I could do without the Ketch/Rowena thing, but I wouldn't mind seeing Ketch around once or twice more this season (although, let's be real, it would have been kind of hilarious if Dean had actually killed him).

I'm disappointed in how little we got of Kevin, but it was still lovely to see Osric Chau. It's so cute to think of him having like... street cred in Hell because God himself sent him there. And as sad as his fate is, maybe there's a way to spin it in future episodes? Even if it's just a cameo, they could give Kevin a happier ultimate fate, depending on how this whole show winds up.

I've saved the Destiel of it all for last. See, when you get episodes like this, that are frantically paced and full of characters and action and plot, the moments that work the best are always the ones that slow down and take a beat, allow for the characters to shine and relationship dynamics to be explored. So here, we have Cas' only real scene in the episode - he's mostly just a background character, except for this one key moment, and it's one of the episode's only truly quality scenes. Not just for the fact that it involves Dean and Cas staring at each other while soft music plays in the background, and they have an angst-y talk about their relationship. I mean, all of that was great and my soul ascended instantly to heaven or whatever. But what's really great about this scene is the way it's solidifying the arc of the season, specifically the motivations and feelings of Dean Winchester, our protagonist. He said much the same thing to Sam last week, and here he's reiterating it to Cas - what is the point of anything? Was anything they've ever done real? If Chuck was pulling the strings all along? I think it's going to be particularly difficult for Dean to get out of that mindset, and it doesn't help that he's still angry with Cas. For Jack, for Mary. And he's still angry at the world for screwing him over. Again.

So yeah. For obvious reasons, I freakin' loved that scene, and I can't wait to see more of Cas and Dean's relationship angst for the rest of the season. I'm not quite naive enough to expect a romantic confirmation, but I do hope that their bond gets a focus in this final season. And while this episode wasn't exactly a winner in my books, there were plenty of little moments within it that make me excited about what comes next. And that promo... oh gosh. If Sam has to kill Rowena I'm going to cry so many tears.

7/10

[spectralarchers]

Christine! Writing help question here, if that's okay with you: I saw your reblog on Crowley's blubber/stutter at points throughout GO series and wanted to ask how to make dialogue realistic? Like irl we say uh and backtrack and stuff a lot but I'm wondering how to pull it off well... and kind of on a tangent, I struggle with finding a balance between dialogue and action (too much dialogue in my case). Any tips?

Hi, Ver!

Sorry it took me so long to reply to your ask, I wasn’t around on my laptop much and I wanted to give you a proper response! The post @verdelet​ is refering to is this one, which is a compilation of all the times Crowley in Good Omens just makes noises instead of saying stuff, where I used the following tags:

#HONESTLY THOUGH #THIS IS A GREAT EXAMPLE OF HOW DIALOGUE WORKS THOUGH! #SOMETIMES WHEN I READ A FIC AND THE AUTHOR INCLUDES THESE SOUNDS IN THEIR DIALOGUE I GET ALL HAPPY! #BECAUSE PEOPLE MAKE THOSE SOUNDS WHEN THEY TALK! #AND LIKE!!! YES!!! #EXCELLENT ACTING CHOICES!!!!

I don’t think I have any specific tips, but let me try. 

There’s one scene I always, always, always think about when I think about my dialogue and writing it, and it’s this one from Ocean’s 11:

Which in the script of the movie looked like this:

DANNY (V.O.) And Saul makes ten. 

48 INT. BAR - NIGHT 

48Danny and Rusty look weary from all this recruitment. Anearby TV with the sound off plays a promo for anupcoming Tyson fight. 

DANNYTen should do it, don't you think? 

(as Rusty shrugs)You think we need one more? 

(as Rusty shrugs)You think we need one more. 

(as Rusty shrugs)Okay. We'll get one more.

It’s super simple, but it works so well, because it feels genuine - the whole Ocean’s franchise is really good with its dialogue (a lot of it was scripted, but a lot of it was unscripted too). This was just for inspiration.

But, like, when I write dialogue - especially in action scenes - I try to let it flow naturally, as much as possible - if that means I have to cut up the description of a car flipping over in order to get the swear word in, I’ll do that:

He’d miscalculated the stickiness of the road - or rather, lack thereof. The moment he felt the car skid off the ice, his heart took an unexpected leap into his throat. 

“Fuck!” 

He immediately gripped the wheel tighter and stopped pressing the brakes in the hope of steering the car back on track. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” he muttered under his breath as he tried to figure out how long he had before they were done for good.

You can also use the dash to cut up your dialogue: 

The road ahead seemed to be going into a tight turn, though, and in spite of his efforts he may not be able to get the car to stop before they hit the bedrock.

And so, the only thing that came out of his lips as he felt the car skid onto the patch of black ice was “Jesu- fu- hold on!”

“Hold on to what?” she yelled from the passenger’s seat, her fingers gripping the safety belt. 

Turning the wheel completely to the other side, in the hopes of forcing it onto the side, he clenched his teeth. 

It’s like a natural cut up of the word, sometimes people get interrupted in what they’re saying, and it’s totally fine to do it in the dialogue as well. I usually keep in mind that the words needs to get cut off in a place that’s logical - for example, if you’re going to cut off “fuck”, better either cut if off at “f-” or at “fu-” because “fuc-” just doesn’t make a lot of sense, if that makes sense?

I also quite like having my characters repeat things, or look for their words when they’re mumbling, so I consciously try and get them to say things either twice or mumble, like I would in real life. It’s like letting the dialogue tell the story, rather than try and say that they’re mumbling or looking for their words: 

Finally, as the car skid to a halt, she hit him in the shoulder. “You! You absolute- you absolute idiot!” she shrieked as him, as she tried hitting him again, but this time, he caught her wrist.

“I’m sorry- hey, stop- I’m sorry, alright?! I didn’t- I didn’t think the road was going to be frozen tonight!”

“You should have known!”

He made a sound, sharply inhaling. “Huh?! I’m sorry I didn’t! Because I don’t control the weather, okay? And can you please stop trying to hit me?!”

He caught her other hand this time and immobilized her in her seat. 

“Uhhh, yeah, pfff.” She paused for a couple of seconds, before resuming: “You’re always, always, always going on about how well you know these- these- these stupid roads!”

One of my favorite parts of dialogue I’ve written is in chapter 7 of Nothing Burns Like the Cold, when Clint is explaining to Steve why the American military is in Greenland, and he’s explaning the Monroe Doctrine and the whole World War II shebang up in the North Pole, because I feel like I made Clint’s long, long, long monologue break up into more understandable pieces of dialogue. I’ve highlighed the ‘dialogue things’ I did in bold in order to make the monologue feel more natural: 

“Well, I’m not sure if you know this, but the Danish Ambassador to the United States during World War Two decided he wasn’t going to take orders from occupied Denmark, and so whenever he spoke to American politicians or diplomats, he would do it on behalf of the ‘free’ Denmark. He thought that because the King and Government were being held prisoner, none of their orders mattered, and apparently we liked that a lot. Especially because of the Monroe Doctrine, I think- I- I think that was it. Because we got afraid that Nazi Germany would establish bases in Greenland, so when this guy, when this uh- this- Kauffman? Yeah, that was his name, it was a big deal when Kauffman came into the picture and said that he was giving the United States authorization to defend Danish colonies on Greenland from the Germans. He was sentenced for treason by everybody back home in Copenhagen, but it’s basically because of his agreement that we’re still in Greenland. He never put an end date on the agreement, I think they called it something like the ‘agreement relating to the defense of Greenland’ but I’m not sure on the exact phrasing. It just states that the American personnel can stay on site until- until- uh, ‘for as long as there is an agreement’?”

Clint rubs a pearl of sweat off his temple, as he takes a breath.

“The US Coast Guard and War Department established some weather and radio stations, and it didn’t really matter after a while, once the war ended. But, a couple of years after the German abdication, stuff happened - NATO, and other agreements, Denmark ratifying the agreement and everything. It made Denmark and the US closer allies. In 1951 though, the Danish and American nations forced native Kalaalit people out of their homes in Thule, because the establishment of the airbase was of “more importance” than them living there, where they’d been living for centuries.” Clint pauses, as he looks over at Steve.

“It was bad, man. Governments said it was on voluntary basis, but it wasn’t. Kind of like when we put the Native peoples of the Americas in camps and called it a good thing,” Clint spits, as he clenches his hands. “After all of that, Greenland became a key point in the Cold War. I mean they set up… They set up 14 bases in Greenland, Bluie West, and Bluie East. And then, when Operation Chrome Dome sailed around, they used Thule as one of the bases where they could re-fuel and load up the B-52s that would fly around 24/7. That operation ended in 1968 when one of the planes crashed.”

He pauses.

“In Greenland. On the - the indlandsis? The ice sheet? Right out of Baffin Bay, they think. They were carrying four hydrogen bombs aboard. Thankfully, there wasn’t a big nuclear explosion because the safeties prevented it, but the explosion caused the sheet to melt and a huge area to become contaminated with radioactive material. It also sank to the bottom of the ocean.”

Clint rubs his face and spits to the side.

“The clean-up, they called it Crested Ice, I think. I mean the plane crashed and burned, and there was a patch of blackened ice which was just- just huge, man. I’ve seen the aerial picture that was taken then, and it was terrible. Some documents which were released from the clean up revealed that plutonium contamination reached extremely high levels, and there was… It was bad, Steve. The workers who helped clean up were poisoned, and they still haven’t received compensation for their work.”

Sighing, Clint finally says the truth that he doesn’t want to tell Steve: “Part of the entire Chrome Dome operation and the Thule Air Base was to patrol the Arctic border to the USSR and to find you, Steve. ” Clint takes a deep breath, as he sees Steve’s head drop next to him.

And, the whole above quote, which is practically 600 words of Clint monologuing, all the while I was writing it, I was sometimes stopping up and reading it out loud to see where would someone pause, where would someone search for their words, where would they be thinking about another word?

I remember when I wrote it, it was difficult because there was a lot of information I had to write correctly (the whole Kauffman and Monroe Doctrine is historically accurate, as is the displacement of the Kalaalit peoples) but also make it seem like it was someone trying to recall something they’d learned a long time ago all the while explaining it to someone who had never heard of it before.

It’s the same thing when your character doesn’t know the thing and motions for it instead. If we continue in the car crash example I was writing earlier, it’d give something like this:

“You told me the bend would be like- like this,” she says, as she moves her fingers in an S-shaped formation, and he shakes his head.

“Nah, it’s more-” he moves her hands closer together, “-like this.”

It’s breaking up the lines and introducing the actions you need to convey where your words can’t do it for you - in the above example with Clint, when he’s looking for his words, I like to think that the reader can imagine him either moving his hands or looking thoughtful because he’s repeating himself, or he’s mumbling, or talking to himself, and therefore, I don’t have to tell the reader that he’s mumbling, because he’s doing it himself? (Does any of this even make sense???)

And, FINALLY, to answer your last question, any tips on finding a balance between action and dialogue would be writing the thing, and then leaving it be for a couple of hours and coming back to it, to read it with a pair of fresh eyes.

If the action scene slows down too much because of the dialogue, you don’t have to interrupt it with actual dialogue, but you can just write that they’re “exchanging swear words” or “yelling whenever their body takes a hit” instead of wanting to force the swear words into the narrative text, if that makes sense?

Otherwise, I don’t have any tips, other than reading your work again if you feel like you were struggling with it. Eventually, if you have someone who is willing to help you out, get a beta and ask them to look out for your pacing. 

@kate-katiehawkeye helped me SO MUCH with Swallow Your Soul, like, the only reason that story makes a bit of sense if thanks to her amazing eyes. 

I hope that this large and long pile of blubber managed to help you out a little bit? I am not the best at giving advice because I feel like half the stuff I’m doing is a total improvisation thing, so... I hope this helped! :D

[mymusehatesme]

Castle of Glass

Chapter One: War

Words: 2140

Summary: A Hell Gate has opened on Earth, so you and your siblings decide to defend humanity, inadvertently locking yourselves out of Heaven.  Now you must wander the Earth doing good deeds until your penance has been served.  Unfortunately, your attempt goes a little awry and you find yourself a prisoner of the man they call the Hollow King….  [Female reader, angel reader.]

Warnings: None

Inspiration was this post: https://beka-tiddalik.tumblr.com/post/160726927715/a-tradition

MASTERLIST                      SERIES MASTERLIST

Your brothers were not royalty or rulers, but they were warriors. When the demons rose up from the Underground and threatened humanity, they all shaved their heads and sent it to the Demon King. You did the same and your sisters did, too.

(Now, this is not to say that all demons are bad, or that demons did not walk the Earth before the war. This is to say that when the Underground emptied, the demons turned the world into chaos, burning the land with every step they took.)

You all fought the demons for humanity, pushed the majority back to the Underground. And when the battle was won, the humans all feared you. They would not thank you, they cowered before you.

Some humans stole your blades and started killing your brothers and sisters.

So the angels learned to hide themselves amongst humanity – and you all did it well. You never used your grace unless it was life or death; and even then, you weighed the consequences.

(You might ask why the angels did not return Skyward. It was because if a single angel did anything without orders on the Earth, it upset the balance in their hearts and they would have to do penance before they were allowed back home.)

Over the years, some of your siblings married humans; some married into royalty, some wed commoners, and some of them decided to have fun while on Earth.

You traveled the world and helped those you could. You had no alliances, no ill will towards anyone – but when you came across this kingdom, the Kingdom of Embers, you had to help.

The barren land had been burned decades ago, but had never recovered because there had been no rain there. Black and gray ash covered the land and the towns you came across were practically empty. A riverbed that ran around the entirety of the kingdom was dry and cracked – no longer did it flow with deep, cool water.

So you sat down and made a spell with your Grace. You pulled the white-blue light out of your chest in the middle of a town, not caring what anyone thought, because there was no one around. Within an hour, the sky was dark and rumbling and the air was soaked with the heavy smell of rain. It started raining an hour later.

The soldiers came for you not long after that. They took you to the palace in chains that kept you bound through magical means. A flame and a ring of Holy Fire in the cells trapped you.

You looked up at the Hollow King, Sam Winchester. The circle of fire you were sitting in threw dancing shadows on the walls and the light danced in his eyes. His brown hair swept to his shoulders – signifying he had not declared war in many, many years.

You wondered what war he had declared. What the knife that he cut his hair with looked like.

There was a blade inside your boot that the soldiers had not found and its shape pressing against your skin comforted you.

His face had been like stone throughout your story and now you understood why they called him the Hollow King. You did, however, find it strangely ironic that his presence took up the room.

He nodded. “I see. So, your spell,” he motioned toward the window and the pouring rain outside, “How long is it supposed to last?”

You looked outside and tsked.  "It will rain for three days," you replied, "Then it will stop for three days, and continue in that pattern.  This cycle will repeat ten times."  

"Sixty days," he mused, "Two months."  He nodded and slowly walked around the room.  "You know, in all the years that my kingdom has been in this state-" he gestured grandly out the window, "no one, ever, has offered assistance.  Even when my people left in droves because of the barren land, we received nothing from our allies." He dropped his arms, but kept his tall, powerful stance.  "They let us starve."

You blinked, not sure what he was trying to say.  Strange that he was so cold to you when he first ordered you put in the tower and now, much later, he spoke to you as though you were a few steps away from being a guest.

“Sire,” a voice called from the stairwell. Sam turned to face the newcomer. The messenger handed him a box and a small tool to pry off the nails before leaving the room, leaving you alone with the king again.

You stared at the box and saw how he was hesitant to open it. Markings painted on the sides gave away its contents in Enochian. You fought the smile that threatened to spill over your features. “How long have I been held prisoner here, your majesty?” you asked.

He glanced at you and began to slowly walk the perimeter of your prison. “Two days,” he replied easily, prying off a nail with the tool the guard had given him.

Refusing to let the fact that you had been here two days and he was only now coming to speak to you bother you, you asked, “You’ve already received a message before this, haven’t you?”

No emotions showed on his face to betray the truth. Tink. The nail clattered to the floor and he pried up the next one.

“The messenger didn’t tell you who it was from because you already knew,” you stated.

Tink.

He had walked halfway around the circle by now. He didn’t spare you a glance; his focus was on the box.

Tink.

“You don’t even need to open it – you know what’s inside,” you goaded, practically giddy with excitement.

Tink. Plack!

The lid fell flat on the stone and the king stared at the inside of the box. It was overflowing with hair.

Long hair, short hair, brown hair, black hair, white hair, thin and straight, coarse and curly….

All for you.

There was a note at the top and he picked it up. It was a list of names and corresponding kingdoms.

     Castiel, King of the Kingdom of Mines

     Balthazar, Captain of the Pirate Band in the SouthEastern Seas

     Michael, Commander of the Legion of Soldiers in the Mountains of Triana

     Hannah, Gabriel, Gadreel, Lucifer, Raphael, Anael, Ezekiel, Samandriel, the list went on and he stopped reading.

Sam picked up a long strand of red hair that you supposed belonged to Anna. She had attached her jeweled hairpin to her strand.

You knew that meant Anna held nothing but utter contempt for whom she had cut her hair when she attached her hairpin.

“When was the last time you cut your hair?” you asked quietly.

Because you have refused to return our sister to us, we hereby declare war upon you.

“When I swore to kill a demon,” he replied distantly. “I didn’t end up killing him, but my hair had already been cut.” War had never been waged upon him nor his kingdom, but he knew the rules. You had never seen or heard of any ruler receiving so much hair before.

“What was the demon’s name and why did you swear to kill him, only to not?” There were demons who wanted nothing more than to help, but the price for a demon’s help was always the same: A soul.

Ripped apart by hellhounds and your soul dragged into the fiery afterlife that was the Underground.

Sam looked up at you, his head tilted a bit. “His name was Crowley,” he answered, noting how you stiffened ever so slightly at the Demon King’s name, “and he initially refused to bring my brother back to life.”

You blinked and a heavy feeling of dread unfurled in the pit of your stomach. Bringing someone back from the dead was not an easy or natural thing. Reapers had to be bargained with, the Underground and Skyward would have to have scoured to find the soul, and even IF the Reapers agreed, the GateKeepers had to allow the soul back out.

And that was considering if the soul had been freshly reaped and the body hadn’t decomposed too far.

That bargain would cost much more than the soul of the one who bargained. You thought about the barren land, the empty towns, and the silent soldiers.

“What did it cost you?” you asked, genuinely curious, but cautious of the answer.

“It cost my soul,” Sam stated, practically emotionless as he straightened up to his full height, “and my lands. I agreed to let the Demon King make a Hell Gate here – and when the demons poured out of the Underground, they scorched the earth and made it barren.”

You jumped to your feet as rage flowed through you. “You,” you spat, “It was you, you let them out!” The faces of your brothers and sisters that died during the battle flashed through your mind and you balled your hands into fists as you gritted your teeth.

The Hollow King tilted his chin up a bit. “You are angry,” he noted, “Why does that anger you?”

“My kin and I came down from the Sky to help your kind,” you seethed, “Because it was our duty to protect you, because the scales had been tipped, we abandoned our home and now cannot return for centuries until our penance has been completed!” Your heart pounded as you thought of all your siblings that died at the hands of humans that were too afraid to accept help and killed angels for the sheer novelty of it.

Kneeling down, you unlaced your boot and plucked the knife free. You stood up and locked eyes with the king again. Without blinking, you reached behind your head and shaved off a strand of hair at the base of your neck. You took a few hairs to tie the strand together and then threw it at his feet.

Sam looked down at your hair, a shadow of surprise on his face, and then back up at you.

Your face was grim with hate and determination. Your kin had added decades to their penance for waging war and you would not let that go unmatched.

“I, (Y/N), declare war upon you,” you defied, tilting your chin up, “for having loosed the Demon Hoard upon the Earth, for all the Humans that died at their hands, and all the Angels that died at the hands of your kind, I declare war upon you.”

He didn’t react. His face never changed to show anger or sadness or cocky assuredness. He simply watched your outburst and cold defiance.

It unnerved you. “What say you?”

“I say… that oil has a few more days until it burns out,” he said, observing the flaming ring that held you captive, “I say I do not fear the entirety of the Skyward Host’s war against me.” He looked up at you and finished, “And I say… I think I’ll send for more oil.”

You blanched. Was… was he mad? Perhaps he was suicidal?

“Do you honestly have such faith in your soldiers and abilities as King that you do not fear us?” you demanded.

Pride overtook his features as he smirked, “I do.”

“And when the Demon King comes to collect your soul?” you asked, “What will you do then? What will your abilities be to him?”

“Oh, he’s already come and gone,” Sam said easily, readjusting the box in his hands, “He’s already collected my debt, in fact, he got it right away after our deal.”

You tilted your head, trying to understand. Not only did this man singlehandedly unleash Hell upon the Earth, he defied the natural order of things by bringing a soul back from the afterlife, and he has apparently been living for years now without a soul? “You… you have no soul?” you asked, furrowing your brows.

“There is more to this than you can see,” Sam offered, picking up your hair from the floor, but not putting it in the box with the others, “and more than I am willing to tell you right now. But I’ll tell you soon enough.” He smiled at you – just a smile, not conveying any emotion or having any deeper meaning than a half-kindness – and turned to the stairs.

He made it ten paces before you cried out to him to wait.

He stopped, but did not turn.

“Was it worth it?” you asked, nearing the flames as far as you dared, “Was your brother worth the cost?”

The Hollow King silently deliberated. He turned his head over his shoulder, but not enough for him to look at you. “Yes. And I’d do it again.”

Then he faced forward again and left you with the crackling flames.

[hekate1308]

Early Mornings

I am afraid I’m getting a little sidetracked with ensuring Mick gets enough character development. Don’t worry, there’s still some destiel and Dean feels. Enjoy!

Dean is the first one up this morning, if you don’t count Crowley (which he doesn’t because someone who doesn’t need to sleep doesn’t get up, period, no matter what the King of Hell thinks).

Sammy has all but given up his early morning runs, preferring to do them in the afternoon or evening instead, and Dean had come to cherish quiet mornings... if he wakes up early, that is.

Still, it’s a nice change in pace from time to time.

Cas, he learned as soon as his angel developed a need for sleep, is not a morning person at all, so it’s Dean’s duty to make sure they have coffee brewing by the time his grumpy boyfriend finds his way into the kitchen. If he deems it too early though, Cas will only huff at the offered drink and tuck Dean back into bed with him.

Those are not bad mornings either, if Dean’s being honest.

Mick of course has his alarm set for 8 am each day, sharp; he suspects it will be a while before he gets out of the schedule the Men of Letters have imposed upon him since he was a child.

That’s okay by him. They have a lot of practice when it comes to rebelling, after all.

Today, though, it’s a quarter to eight when Mick enters the kitchen, fidgeting.

“You alright?” Dean asks.

“Yeah”.                                

Yeah. Would have been “yes, thank you for asking” a few weeks ago. God knows how much worth the Men of Letters put on this pretend politeness. At least he doesn’t sound like a walking Oxford Dictionary anymore.

“You sure?”

Mick takes the cup of coffee he offers him and takes a deep breath.

“Do you by any chance know a djinn named Al?”

Oh. So that’s what this is about.                    

“Did he dream-walk into your head last night?”

“I wasn’t aware they could, but it’s logical, I suppose.”

Dean nods.

“He didn’t do anything wrong, did he? He’s usually a pretty cool guy...”

“No, no, he... “wanted to check in””.

Alright, he might be biased, but Mick’s quoty fingers aren’t half as adorable as Cas’. Just saying.

“Apparently he heard about me and wanted to make sure I was genuinely on your side.”

After a pause he adds, “You have a lot of... people looking out for you.”

Dean doesn’t begrudge him the slight hesitation. A few short months ago, every not-human was a monster to him.

“They started piling up at some point” he tells him. “What can I say, you warn them from certain death, people tend to get attached.”

Mick nods, looking down in his coffee.

“I’ve also felt... like I was being watched several times” he admits. “I recall the feeling from meeting Mel, and it’s usually around water... I think she’s spying on me”.

“Why would she? You seemed to get on pretty well.”

It was a memorable visit, Dean will say that.

“Hey, lovebirds!”

They’ve barely made it through the door but Mel’s already waving at them, looking as at home in the swimming pool as a –

Well.

“Hi Mel.”

“Figure I’d come and check on you. See how the newest house guest is faring.”

She’s so focused on making sure they are all safe – Dean knows that look of seemingly being relaxed while on high alert at the same time, he used to see it in his mirror daily – that she doesn’t even use the old Gaelic ritual. She just comes straight to the point.

“He was a little shaken that we had to burst him out, but nothing too bad.”

“Thanks to yours truly” Crowley adds, appearing next to them.

Apparently walking was too much work.

“Ah, the mistress of the waves.”

“Your Majesty”.

“And how are you?”

Her gaze, full of age and wisdom and the secrets nature spirits keep, slide over Dean’s face.

He smiles. He knows it’s a pained smile, but Cas is holding his hand. He’ll be ok.

“I’m fine.”

There was a time when these words were always, invariably, a lie. When they meant “I am not fine in any shape or form, but I know I have to be so things don’t fall apart”.

But this time is long gone. Has been for so long sometimes it’s difficult to remember that he didn’t always wake up to Cas’ blue eyes looking at him as if he’s the most beautiful soul ever created, Crowley grumpily putting breakfast on the motel room table, Sam happily bouncing in eventually with the news of the day.

“Really, I – “

“I can tell” she says simply.

Sam and Mick come in.

“Ah, there he is.”

She smiles at Mick.

“Just wanted to see the newest member of the team and bid him welcome.”

There is indeed a welcome there, but a threat too.

Mick gets it.

“We did. But she’s not... she’s... something else. And she’s very fond of you.”

Dean grins.

“That’s why it’s good to have a boyfriend who speaks Gaelic.”

“No, not just you as a pair. You. Dean Winchester. Al warned me about it too. Don’t betray any of you individually.”

“Yikes. Sounds serious.”

“He’s really alright.”

“That he is. Hasn’t taken a single victim since he was old enough to feed himself.”

“He’s a bit... overenthusiastic, I would say” Mick says, playing around with his cup.

“Once he figured out I wasn’t a threat – “

He takes a deep breath.

“He thought it would be nice to show me my earliest memories.”

Dean frowns. Sammy told him about his and Mick’s talk.

Mick said he never met his parents.

And that means –

Oh, God, Al. Well-meaning, friendly Al, thinking Mick would be so freaking happy.

It sounds just like him, really.

“I never knew what they looked like” Mick breathes.

“Man, that’s gotta be rough. Did Al – “

“He saw my reaction and brought me out of there. I snapped awake.”

“And weren’t able to go back to sleep” Dean finishes.

“You know the feeling, I assume.”

“Yeah”. Dean laughs somewhat bitterly.

“If I’d known what exactly I couldn’t go to sleep over...”

It’s weird now, remembering missing his mother so badly. In a way, he still does – he misses the woman he thought he mourned, misses her warmth, her easily given love.

He had no idea she wasn’t even ready to try and get to know them.

God knows this isn’t easy. But she could have at least tried.

“Do you think about her a lot?” Mick asks suddenly.

Dean raises an eyebrow.

“I’m sorry”. He laughs. It sounds slightly hysterical.

“I’m just – trying to to – “

Dean decides to cut him some slack. He left his whole world behind because he thought it was the right thing to do, and he just saw his parents for the very first time.

“Of course. Can’t help it. Just wish they were more pleasant thoughts.”

“She’s... Mary is...”

It’s kind of touching how he tries to spin the black-and-white seeing killer they escaped from into something Dean could be proud to call his mother.

Maybe he’s being unfair. That’s what haunts him the most, sometimes. But he’s alright. He has Cas to talk to, and Sam.

“It’s alright. You don’t have to. I made my decision and I haven’t regretted it once.”

Mick’s studying him.

“I was right about you.”

“What do you mean?”

Is he imagining it or is Mick actually blushing?

“Nothing. I – thank you, Dean.”

And he leaves the kitchen.

Oh well.

One thing’s clear.

Mel, Al, their other friends...

They have no reason to worry.

They went into the enemy’s lair and brought back another ally.  

[boyswhofellout]

Lgbt+ ask game

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns?

Bisexual, she/her

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?

Uh well, I always kinda knew I liked both and in my family, no one was really homophobic so I never thought it was weird. My first kiss with a girl I was in 4th grade and she was my best friend. My policy was always “if you’re hot, I like you” and it didn’t occur to me that there was a term for that (and yeah I’m going with the OG term for Bi meaning the attraction to two OR MORE genders don’t @ me) Anyway in high school I had my ‘coming out’ when my friend group consisted of two pansexuals, a straight and another bisexual. They gave me a name for how I felt

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?

Since I am FAB I never had to deal with that sort of thing!

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?

I guess the first people I officially told were my friends and they didn’t bat an eye. 

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?

When I finally like posted it on facebook and wore shirts around school and didn’t care who heard, it was a great feeling. I was much luckier than a lot of folks because if anyone at my school had a problem with it, they didn’t let on. My family was accepting, my friends obviously were, and the kids at my school didn’t give a fuck.

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?

When I told my mom and stepdad they just said they knew and they loved me all the same. My mom actually said she and my bio dad had known since I was like 2 lol

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?

The threesome question, unicorn hunters, the like. Turning on your settings to women on tinder is so annoying because every other person is a couple ‘looking for a nice girl who wants to have some fun’

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.

Comfy. I live in leggings and t-shirts/tank tops. I also always have an overcoat of some sort, be it a leather (pleather) jacket, my favorite denim jacket, a sweatshirt, a hoodie, I have all types of overcoats. It’s actually a problem

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?

Non-canon of course cause most fandoms don’t like us: Ambrollins is probably the top, Aziraphale and Crowley from Good Omens (is that canon? Whatever), and Mickey and Ian from Shameless

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

Uh well, I don’t wear it super often. If I’m going to a nice event or it’s a nice occasion or even if I just feel like it and have time I wear like foundation and contour the whole nine yards, but I don’t do it every day. 

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?

I do not, thankfully.

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?

The pretty obvious one: That we don’t need a pride month/parade and on the reverse, since we have one why isn’t there a straight month/parade

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

For the most part, I’ve had positive, welcoming experiences. I went to NYC pride last year and it was just very happy and welcoming and a sense of community

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?

GATEKEEPING! Nothing bothers me more than people acting like there are strict guidelines you have to follow in order to be in the LGBT+ community. Just shut up and let people live, dear lord!

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?

Well I mentioned NYC pride which was a lot of fun. I’m from PA so it wasn’t my own city’s pride, but it was so much fun! I almost went to Philly pride that same year, but it was supposed to rain so we canceled. It didn’t rain

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?

I think Halsey is a big influence for me, she’s doing good work. Also JVN who recently came out as non-binary. He just gives me a confidence I never knew I lacked. I also just a really big fan of Tessa Thompson

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

I’ve only dated men as of now, but I have been talking to a girl I matched with on tinder and she’ll probably be the first girl I date

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?

I honestly haven’t read a book that wasn’t for school in literal years, none of which included lgbt+ characters so I can’t answer this tbh. Actually, I’ll say Harry Potter, according to JK that’s suuuuper LGBT, it just wasn’t important to the plot :/

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?

The closest I’ve come so far, in my very small town and closed off life, was a girl that I matched with on tinder.

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?

Sense8 was cool, big fan of that show. I honestly can’t say I’ve seen any other shows that focus on LGBT characters. Send me recommendations! 

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?

I feel like at this point, all the people I see on my dash are LGBT somehow soooo

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?

Queer! I think it’s mostly already been said, but it’s a good umbrella word for those that don’t exactly know what it is they feel or identify as. It also can take place of titles like bisexual heteroromantic or asexual biromantic. It’s just a nice general term to say without having to explain your whole LGBT story to complete strangers!

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?

I have! There’s a place here in Allentown called Stonewall (I know, right!) and on Thursdays they do drag night along with 18+ so in high school, my group of friends would go. It was always so much fun!

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?

I’ve never really questioned my gender, I’ve always known I was cisgender but it is important to me that I live up to the women I look up to like Carrie Fisher and my mom.

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?

Tough question. Yes and no. If I ever have kids it’ll be adopted because I never want to be pregnant, no exceptions. I’m hesitant though bc my parents have instilled in me a reaction that makes me yell and I’m easily irritated and I also kinda practically raised my youngest brother at a young age so I’m not sure I’m cut out the be a parent

What identity advice would you give your younger self?

Advice in general: Go to more pride things. Join the pride+ club on campus earlier, take any advantage possible to go to parades and just be more annoying about your sexuality. Also! Find more lgbt friends, having friends that are allies is amazing, but actually having friends that are part of the community makes a huge difference

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I think they’re dumb af. Fuck gender roles in relationships and just in general.

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?

Not particularly, just be your genuine self!

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?

It’s not nearly as small a community as people think. Like, we’re considered minority which makes people think there isn’t a lot of us, but (and especially in recent years) I feel like you’ll meet more LGBT+ people than straight in some cases. Also that the majority within the LGBT+ community is bisexual, I feel like a lot of people don’t know that

Why are proud to be lgbt+?

Why wouldn’t I be? lol

♡ Happy pride from @hogwartsonline ♡

[democratsunited-blog]

Don't Believe the Media Hype. Progressives Are Struggling in New York Races. – InsideSources

https://uniteddemocrats.net/?p=7603

Don't Believe the Media Hype. Progressives Are Struggling in New York Races. – InsideSources

There’s a fierce battle being waged nationwide for the soul of the Democratic Party. Is it the the party of Andrea Ocasio-Cortez and Bernie Sanders; self-styled Democratic Socialists fighting to reverse income inequality, proliferate the tenets of social justice, and empower workers? Or is it the party of Hillary Clinton and, say, Dianne Feinstein: pragmatic moderates and liberals tacking to the center–business friendly, socially liberal but inoffensive–in an effort to create a big tent party and attract moderates and independents to their cause?

This dynamic was on full display in June, when Rep. Joe Crowley, the fourth ranking Democrat in the House, was unseated by Andrea Ocasio-Cortez. Cortez, a Democratic Socialist and a political neophyte, alleged that Crowley failed to adequately represent his constituents as an establishment liberal and a party power broker. The voters agreed, handing Ocasio-Cortez the nomination with a surprisingly strong 15-point margin of victory, though in a low turnout primary.

Now, a slate of progressive candidates are trying to recreate Ocasio-Cortez’s success on the state level in the primary on September 13th. But, despite how it may appear, and despite how progressives may frame it, that same ideological clash just doesn’t seem to have materialized in the state primary.

In the gubernatorial primary, Cynthia Nixon, an actress of Sex and the City fame is, like Ocasio-Cortez, making her first run at public office. She is challenging two-term incumbent Andrew Cuomo. Nixon is trying to flank Cuomo from the left and, in somewhat similar form to Ocasio-Cortez, making the race a referendum on what she claims is his relatively moderate governing style as she also points to the corruption scandals surrounding his administration. “The Nixon campaign has been arguing that Cuomo has been johnny come-lately on a lot of issues,” says SUNY New Paltz government professor Gerald Benjamin. One prominent example of this is Cuomo’s opposition to Donald Trump.

In 2017, Cuomo was seen as something of a relative soft-liner on opposing the Trump administration. But as election season has heated up, so to have Cuomo’s excoriations of the president. Now he is widely seen as one of Trump’s fiercest critics. But that, it seems, was more a product of opportunism than ideology.

Benjamin posits that, at first, Cuomo may have seen Trump as something of a political asset, if not an outright ally. “A Governor [of New York] might think, even though they’re from different parties, ‘it might be useful to have a President from New York,” he says. This is in line with the attitudes of many who saw Trump as something of a moderate in the 2016 election. But like those voters, Cuomo sees that Trump is governing hyper-conservatively. Now, Benjamin says, “It’s almost as if he’s running against the president for governor.”

Jim Battista, a professor of political science at SUNY Buffalo and an expert on New York State politics, notes that while resistance to Trump could explain a lot of Cuomo’s recent policy shifts, it could also be attributed to Nixon’s influence. “The past year or so has seen Cuomo adopting some more liberal positions on a raft of issues,” he says, but “it’s more-or-less impossible to know how much of that is to counterpressure Nixon and how much is just that he’s been taking a more combative and clearly liberal or progressive attitude since Trump’s election.”

Nixon has taken firmly progressive stances on everything from education to housing to drug laws. She has made transportation a cornerstone of her campaign, hammering Cuomo on recent MTA calamities such as 2017’s “summer of hell,” a period fraught with delays, track fires and complete apathy towards New York’s transportation system. She has even gone so far as to align herself with the emerging Democratic Socialist movement. Put simply, she is doing everything she can to make herself the left-wing alternative to Cuomo.

But Cuomo was already widely seen as not only one of the most liberal governors in the United States, but also a pretty good ideological representative of New York voters. The New York electorate is liberal, no doubt, but they’re not quite Vermont liberal. Progressivism in the vein of Bernie Sanders doesn’t tend to play well in New York City, the heart of New York’s Democratic population. Many of those voters are black and hispanic: demographic groups which tend to be more moderate than progressive. Battista points out that “Democratic Socialists seem to be a substantially whiter party than the Democrats overall.” For that reason, Sanders-style progressivism and Democratic Socialism only really plays in the sparsely populated rural, and predominantly white, areas of upstate New York.

Nixon is also a pretty weak candidate, and probably isn’t the best standard-bearer for progressivism in New York. She has been bashed for a lack of substantial experience in government or management of any kind. Those criticisms, the ideological makeup of New York and the difficulty of unseating an incumbent, especially one as powerful as Cuomo, have made it difficult for her to make a dent in the polls.

According to a recent poll by Siena Research Institute, an Albany research firm, Cuomo leads Nixon by a factor of two-to-one, 60 percent to 29 percent–meaning the election could be more media hype than a genuinely close race. Unsurprisingly, Cuomo’s strongest numbers come from self-identified “moderates,” while Nixon is strongest with liberals. Cuomo also holds a resounding lead in NYC and the NYC suburbs, which tend to favor establishment candidates, and Black and Latino voters. Nixon’s strength is among white voters and those in the more rural upstate areas. At the end of the day, however, Cuomo still holds healthy leads in every category.

The story doesn’t change much when you look down-ballot.

Several candidates have lined up to replace acting Attorney General Barbara Underwood. Underwood stepped into the top job after the resignation of her predecessor, Eric Schneiderman, following a New Yorker report of his alleged sexual abuse of several women. Three of the four major candidates running to are women. This race, though somewhat more competitive than the gubernatorial race, is still pretty much decided against the candidate furthest to the left.

The leader of the pack is New York City Public Advocate Letitia James, a black woman who was handpicked by Cuomo and has garnered the endorsements of powerful politicians and public officials across the state. She is facing Sean Patrick Maloney, the first openly gay Congressman from the New York and a Hudson Valley moderate who ran for Attorney General back in 2006 (full disclosure: I interned for Maloney several years ago); Zephyr Teachout, a Fordham Law Professor who previously challenged Cuomo in the 2014 gubernatorial primary and who ran for Congress in 2016; and Leecia Eve, an attorney and ex-aide to Cuomo and Senator Hillary Clinton, from Buffalo.

The Siena poll shows James leading with 25 percent, followed by Maloney with 16 percent, Teachout with 13 percent and Eve with just 4 percent. James, like Cuomo, is strongest amongst moderates and conservatives, NYC residents, and voters of color. Maloney leads narrowly among suburban, upstate and white voters, while Teachout is nearly tied with James among liberals and with Maloney among white voters. 42 percent are still undecided.

Teachout is clearly the most progressive of the three candidates. She is running the most heavily anti-Trump campaign, while advocating strongly for campaign finance reform. She is cross-campaigning with Nixon and Ocasio-Cortez. She is hampered a bit by the fact that a significant portion of her donations have come from outside New York State, as well as the fact that she has run for so many offices in so short a time. As Benjamin puts it: “She seems to want to run for anything that’s available.”

Like Nixon, Teachout suffers from a lack of support outside rural, upstate communities. “You can’t have a win as a Democrat with an upstate-based strategy,” says Benjamin, “You got to hunt where the ducks are.” In this case, the ducks, Democratic voters, are heavily clustered in New York City.

Maloney has run into a similar demographic problem. His moderate reputation and a massive $3 million war chest have allowed him to make inroads with the affluent communities of Long Island and the lower Hudson Valley, but that’s about as far as a moderate–who has voted with Trump 34% of the time–can get in New York. Maloney has also failed to get significant in-state endorsements due to the fact that he’s been working on the federal level. Both he and Teachout seem to be shut out of the New York City game.

Contrast that with James, who, thanks to Cuomo’s backing, has racked up endorsements from of a wide network of powerful politicians, unions, and party organizations across the state. Both she and Cuomo were easily nominated to get on the primary ballot at the state Democratic convention back in May, winning 85% and 95% of delegates respectively. Also like Cuomo, James has higher name recognition than her opponents and is popular in New York City thanks to her work as a solidly liberal Public Advocate. With pretty solid polling leads, it seems that, barring any unforeseen events, she and Cuomo will cruise to victory on primary day.

While this race could be looked upon with an ideological lens, the takeaway would ultimately be that progressivism isn’t ready for prime time in urban states. Perhaps New Yorkers just aren’t ready for Vermont-style politics.

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[dani-qrt]

Macron Takes a Risk in Courting Trump, but Has Little to Show for It

And the verdict on the French president’s subtle calculus toward Mr. Trump is distinctly mixed. Almost alone among Europe’s leaders, Mr. Macron has struck an apparent rapport with the mercurial American president, who has taken pride in testing, even alienating, some of the United States’ oldest and truest allies.

Mr. Macron has made a gamble, given Mr. Trump’s unpopularity, that he can court him but not be tarnished by him — or even that he can burnish his own reputation as a leader who is so psychologically astute that he can gain the ear of an American president who is in many respects his polar opposite.

A year into a sustained charm offensive, Mr. Macron has won a trip to Washington, occasioned by an invitation from Mr. Trump for a formal state visit, the first the American leader has extended during his presidency.

But other than that, he has little to show for his courtship of Mr. Trump. Mr. Macron has gotten “nothing” was the unsparing judgment of Denis Lacorne, who teaches at Sciences-Po in Paris and is among the most seasoned observers of Franco-American relations.

Mr. Macron pitched hard to bring Mr. Trump around on climate change, the antinuclear proliferation deal with Iran and trade tariffs on steel and aluminum, Mr. Lacorne noted.

Video

Trump and Macron’s Relationship, Explained

How did the French leader Emmanuel Macron and President Trump end up with such a cordial relationship? And what does France get out of it?

By AINARA TIEFENTHÄLER on Publish Date April 23, 2018. Photo by Stephen Crowley/The New York Times. Watch in Times Video »

But the American president withdrew from the Paris climate accord; is on the verge of abandoning the Iran deal and potentially could force the Europeans to leave it, as well; and is moving ahead with tariffs on aluminum and steel that will hurt some European allies.

“You don’t see concrete results,” said Laurence Nardon, the director of the North America program at the French Institute of International Relations.

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But Mr. Macron, in her view, may get something intangible. “What Macron gets is that he is seen as being close to the U.S. and even to Trump, and that gives his presidency and France bigger clout,” Ms. Nardon said.

Mr. Macron has built a career out of offering respectful, flattering attention to older power figures. Mr. Trump is only the latest in a succession of such men — François Hollande, the former French president; Jacques Attali, a former presidential counselor — Mr. Macron has cleverly used and then leapfrogged over.

The French leader had the insight that Mr. Trump would be thrilled by the military might, pomp and circumstance of France’s annual Bastille Day Parade, with its show of military hardware, and invited him to share a front-row seat last July.

Mr. Trump was so taken with it, he ordered up one of his own for this year, now tentatively scheduled for Nov. 11, Veterans Day, but with details still in flux.

The French president also took Mr. Trump and his wife to dinner in a formal restaurant in the Eiffel Tower, a canny recognition of Mr. Trump’s attraction to glitz.

No one should confuse Mr. Macron’s attention to Mr. Trump’s likes and dislikes with a genuine bromance, however, and Mr. Macron’s staff bristles at the suggestion that the two are friends.

Asked at a media luncheon about purported closeness between the two leaders, Benjamin Griveaux, the government’s spokesman, responded: “I don’t think they are buddies. The goal is not to have affectionate relations, but to establish some sort of personal connection.”

Mr. Macron himself makes selective criticisms of Mr. Trump as if to send a clear signal to the French that he is not naïve. He said publicly that Mr. Trump had made a mistake to deride Haiti and African nations as “shithole countries.”

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His tone in talking about the Iran nuclear nonproliferation pact and the Paris climate accord brushes aside Mr. Trump’s positions. “There is no Plan B,” his aides say of the Iran deal, echoing Mr. Macron’s frequent comment about the climate pact, “There is no Planet B.”

Photo

A coal-fired plant in Juliette, Ga. Mr. Macron tried hard to bring Mr. Trump around on climate change, but the American president withdrew from the Paris climate accord. Credit Branden Camp/Associated Press

The Janus-faced approach — at once warm and friendly to Mr. Trump but at the same time keeping his options open — in some ways reflects the French love-hate relationship with the United States.

France disdains America’s brashness and unilateralism but also admires its popular culture and the fluidity of a society where it is easier to rise to wealth and power than in France.

In foreign policy, France’s independent line, forged by the former president and general Charles de Gaulle, was clearest in France’s refusal to go along with the American invasion of Iraq.

More recently, however, France and the United States have found themselves on the same page when it comes to terrorism and working closely together on the problems in North Africa, as well as in the Middle East.

So as genuine allies on the defense front, Mr. Macron “has to try” to bring Mr. Trump along, Ms. Nardon said.

If he can move Mr. Trump a little on policy, so much the better, but as Mr. Macron has said himself, Mr. Trump is not easy to persuade.

“Sometimes I manage to convince him, sometimes I fail,” he told a BBC interviewer in January.

The accommodating dynamic between the two men, and perhaps the limits of the relationship, were evident during their joint appearance at the Élysée Palace in July before the Bastille Day celebration.

As they stood side by side, there was a lot of shoulder-patting back and forth. But Mr. Trump’s breezy suggestions of acquiescence to the French point of view — on climate change, for instance — turned out to be no more substantive than the off-the-cuff way in which they were delivered.

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“Something could happen with respect to the Paris accord,” Mr. Trump said. “We’ll see what happens.” Nothing ever did.

The risk, said Thomas Guénolé, a political scientist who follows geopolitics closely and teaches at the University of Paris-East at Créteil, is that Mr. Macron gives too much to Mr. Trump and gets little in return.

“Emmanuel Macron doesn’t risk being unpopular for trying to get things from Donald Trump and trying to negotiate with him,” said Mr. Guénolé.

Photo

Mr. Macron took Mr. Trump and his wife to dinner in July at a formal restaurant in the Eiffel Tower, a canny recognition of Mr. Trump’s attraction to glitz. Credit Stephen Crowley/The New York Times

“The problem would come if, like Tony Blair, he tried to get things by developing a strong relationship with the U.S. president, but afterward got too little,” said Mr. Guénolé, referring to the former British prime minister who allied himself with President George W. Bush’s decision to remove Saddam Hussein and found himself and his country mired in a yearslong war in Iraq.

Mr. Guénolé, Ms. Nardon and other analysts say that Mr. Macron is taking advantage of the vacuum left in Europe by Prime Minister Theresa May’s preoccupation with how to get Britain out of the European Union and Chancellor Angela Merkel’s focus on maintaining an unwieldy coalition in Germany.

In a way, that fits well with the Trump White House.

“France’s cooperation with the United States has always been pragmatic,” said Alexandra de Hoop Scheffer, a senior trans-Atlantic fellow and director of the Paris office of the German Marshall Fund.

“So in a certain way, the French pragmatic way mirrors Trump’s transactional approach,” she added. “It’s why they can succeed in getting along while they have very deep policy disagreements.”

If the rhetoric is stripped away, Mr. Macron in fact has set rather modest goals, although the show of friendship with Mr. Trump can be distracting, she said.

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“It’s to keep the U.S. engaged in the international system, the multilateral system, and not give the U.S. the sense that the Europeans are trying to isolate Washington,” she said.

Mr. Macron will be in Washington for three days, with a State Dinner planned for Tuesday and a speech to a joint session of Congress on Wednesday. Still, a senior aide at the Élysée tried to lower expectations.

It would be a mistake to judge the success of the trip by what the French president could get from Mr. Trump, the aide said. Instead, the visit will allow time for the two leaders to luxuriate in the pomp and circumstance that they both enjoy and for them to talk in a more personal way with their wives present.

In a January television interview, Mr. Macron waxed about how the two men talked often and how he felt “attached” to Mr. Trump. But when the interviewer questioned how he could be friendly with the American president, Mr. Macron laid out his colder, strategic assessment.

“The United States is the premier power; it is our most important partner in multilateral endeavors; it’s our first partner in the fight against terrorism; it is important for collective security,” he said.

“We can be angry with the United States, we may disagree about the methods as we do on Iran, but at the end, we are in agreement,” he said.

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[nellie-elizabeth]

Supernatural: Absence (14x18)

Well... yep.

Cons:

This is only a con if it doesn't get addressed in future weeks, but I am mad about the way Dean spoke to Cas. Actually, it's not quite that cut and dry - I'm not necessarily mad that he lashed out and said something hurtful, but I'm mad that even after Dean admits to Sam that the blame isn't solely on Cas, we don't get to see Dean and Cas discuss what happened. If this ends up happening in the next two episodes, I'll eat my words, but for now, I'm frustrated by Dean's behavior and a lack of resolution therein.

I see that Bobby is in the promo for next week's episode, but even so, I was slightly annoyed the whole episode wondering why nobody was mentioning him or calling him or anything. He and Mary were, like, a thing, right? Shouldn't he have had the opportunity to be present at her funeral?

Pros:

This episode did something so smart in keeping it very focused on a single, important fact: Jack killed Mary. The whole episode is dealing with the ramifications of that for various characters. Sam, Dean, and Cas are frantically looking for Mary and Jack, as the truth slowly dawns on them. Rowena can't locate Mary on Earth. Jack is being plagued by visions of Lucifer, and goes to Rowena for help. Cas goes to Heaven and ensures that Mary is at peace with John. The Winchesters mourn Mary. Jack tries to bring Mary back, but can't. There weren't any subplots or extra elements to gum up the works here, and I think the focus of the episode is what made it so strong.

I saw that people on Tumblr weren't thrilled with the idea of Jack seeing Hallucifer, but as I mentioned in my review last week, I'm cool with Lucifer as an endgame villain. Jack might not be completely soulless and unfeeling in the same way that Sam was under similar conditions. He's clearly struggling and under a lot of strain, and we know that this kid has got some serious daddy issues. How could he not? His father is the literal devil, and at the same time he also has three dads who don't really know what they're doing, but who he's desperate to impress, and he's just done something so horrific he can't ever see a way back from that. But the thing is, Jack didn't kill Mary in a moment of cold, heartless calculation. He killed her because he lost control of his powers. I'm not saying Sam and Dean are going to forgive him instantly, but viewers of this show know that there might actually be a way to come back from this.

I'm glad that Rowena played such a vital role in this episode. It can be really frustrating to watch female characters on this show die, because we don't exactly have a bunch of them to go around. But Rowena has become one of the surprising delights of this show, and her presence always invigorates an episode. Kind of like with Crowley in the later seasons of the show, we're not really even keeping up the pretense that she and the Winchesters are enemies at this point. But Rowena can allow herself to be kind, to let her guard down a bit and be genuine with the boys. She's willing to help with a locator spell, she tries to encourage Jack to talk to the Winchesters... she's a genuine ally and one who I'd be sad to lose.

As I mentioned above, I'll be pissed if Dean's behavior towards Cas isn't addressed. But for what we saw in this episode specifically, I really liked seeing how Dean handled his grief here. He starts by being in denial about Jack, continually insisting that they don't know yet what really happened. They don't know Mary is dead. They don't know Jack is soulless. When the truth comes out, he lashes out in predictable anger. But I feel like we also see in this episode how Dean Winchester has grown over the years. He talks to Sam about how he's feeling. He's pissed at Cas, but when Sam points out that he himself is also responsible, that he was willing to see past how dangerous Jack was becoming, Dean listens. And he admits that he too let some things slide because he didn't want to admit the truth. They both love Jack. And they've both been willing to let a lot of things go for the sake of their family in the past. Sure, the consequences here are about as dire as they could be... but how could they have behaved differently? How could they have abandoned Jack? It's a delicious, angst-y scenario and I'm all about it.

I like the way they handled Mary's death. It happens off-screen, but we see these flashes of the impact she had on everyone's lives. We see her training with Jack when he was without her powers, and encouraging Sam about his difficulties with his role as a father figure with Jack. We see Mary when she was still new to being alive again, working to understand Castiel and let him know she values him. I liked all of these moments. They were very sweet and appropriate and showed how Mary added value to their lives and to the show. But it was only the last moment, the part they showed with Dean, that really got to me. It's just Dean driving in the impala, with Mary asleep on his shoulder. Dean looks down at her and smiles. So simple, no words necessary. That's the way to get an emotional reaction out of me, honestly. So sad.

I think for now that's where I'll stop. I'm fascinated with what they've done with Jack's character. They managed to integrate him and make him feel like a real part of the show, and now they've twisted things up so badly that it's difficult for me to imagine them coming out of it with everything intact. I'm okay with Mary's time on the show being over. These past few seasons have been a bonus, something she got to experience despite her death decades ago. But she's at peace now. Whether or not our boys are going to be able to recover from this, though... that's another story.

9/10