#but i COULDN'T. very unfortunate. so i hope you like what i've done instead!!

[moodmoodthecrabking]

melancholic grace chasity moodboard with sapphic and christian themes requested by anon

[xitsensunmoon]

My first ever comic con! And first cosplay too. Of course it's gonna be my boy :] Ramblings about the process are under the cut(Let me know if?? You would want me to elaborate with process images for any of the steps?)

The costume took me forever to make, as I've never done any machine sewing, sculpting, fabric dying or spray painting before but learning all of these was so fucking fun!! I never realised just how many different skills go into making a cosplay but it was so worth it!!!

Almost all of the clothes(except the hat) were purchased first as bases, but all of the detailing was added by me. All of the fabric used was originally just scraps that I was given for free so I needed to learn how to dye and dye all of the stars, they were originally white.

The sewing machine was its own beast that brought me tons of frustration from the lack of skill and knowledge (it was devastating to find out that 95% of fuck ups were my fault and not the machine's lmao). But as a result, a hat sewn from scratch, all of the fur trims, embroidery on the corset, stars and the collar(which is very hard to see on the pictures unfortunately) was all added manually. The stars and the stripes(on the back of the cape) were attached using heat-and-bond adhesive (I WISH I knew about such thing just when I started working on this. It would save me so much time and nerves.)

Then I found out about polymorph(mouldable plastic) and it has become the next thing I wanted to learn, to sculpt the claws and the fangs(yes, they're handmade jfksjs). The claws I then primed and painted in trillion coats because I wasn't satisfied with the colour of the spray paint. The fangs I moulded to my own teeth and then stained with tea to match the colour of my teeth :)c

As for makeup, I used Mehron Paradise water activated paints. At first I wanted to try to save money and bought myself Snazaroo instead, which unfortunately turned out to be a waste. Snazaroo didn't hold on my face for longer than 2 hours, cracking and peeling awfully. Mehron on the other hand survived 11 hours of me smiling, talking, emoting and such and didn't even crease at the smile lines(I'm actually shocked about that). It obviously works like any other makeup which means your skin texture and wrinkles won't go anywhere but Mehron's elasticity pleasantly surprised me. It did obviously smear from sweat and saliva(if you're eating and licking your lips) but if you don't touch the skin it just dries again, self setting. But if it's dry it's fully smear-proof. Highly recommend!

And last but not least, I've decided against painting my hands as it was very risky that I will stain everything I touch at the smallest hint of sweat. So instead I got myself gloves-tights(? Not sure how they're called but it's made from the same fabric as tights) and painted them with normal acrylic paint(did you know you could dye fabric with acrylic paint? I personally didn't), then heat set with an iron and voilà, they're reusable, my hands are not stained after an exhausting day and I don't stain everything I touch. It worked wonderfully which honestly was a surprise as I was really sceptical that acrylic paint will somehow stay in place.

I think this whole thing took me minimum of 6 months with big-big breaks for my school and life in general. But I'm really proud! This project taught me so many new skills and I couldn't have been happier about learning new knowledge, even if it sucked to fail in the meantime.

Everyone at the con was really nice and gave me a large confidence boost even tho it was my first time and I had no idea what I was doing. Taking photos with other people was really awkward/new for me as I hate cameras so I really had no idea how to pose/behave in front of one. But that's okay I think. This whole experience definitely made me want to do this again, so I think that will come with experience. Thank you for reading this far, hope you enjoyed this little summary :)

[stil-lindigo]

Hey, I just wanted to share something with you, as someone who's so invested in the Palestine conflict, I hope it might inspire hope, even a little.

I was born and live in Egypt, a very conservative and religious country. These days I deleted my Tiktok and rarely ever use Twitter, as I'm in my senior year, and seeing the constant deaths and torture was getting into me so much that I couldn't even eat or drink properly, nevertheless properly study. I honestly am not proud of myself for doing so, but there's comfort in the fact Egypt is so Pro-Palestine. There's a lot to be done, and even for people like me, we can help.

My school has been donating food, clothes and blankets to Palestine. The McDonald's in here have been trying to distance themselves, claiming they're "100% Egyptian", only to get mocked and insulted. I go by the local McDonald's, there's a lot of schools where I am, around 5 in two blocks, and where before they were constantly so full, these days they're so empty. I can only see maybe 3, 4 people in there. A lot of people in my school are on a complete strike, against every American product. We've resorted to buying and getting local products instead. Egypt is doing very poorly economically at the moment, but there's still a lot of effort into knocking out American products, even if not by the companies, by the youth and the children. I can't go a single class without one of my teachers openly supporting Palestine. My Arabic teacher constantly uses the people in Gaza to teach me grammar, calling them brave and courageous. My geography teacher denies Isreal, and has been in league with others to get more donations and aid. Egyptians believe so truly that Palestine will be free that it's hard not to think so too. I've had classmates openly agree that if they could, they'd join the army to help fight for Palestine, I've seen more people than ever mocking the current regime, I've seen more people than ever falling out of the American illusion and seeing it for what it is. I've spent a lot of religion classes being taught Arabic brotherhood and chivalry, when previously, the lessons were stereotypically conservative in nature and I used to despise them for it.

Yes, the government sucks like every other, but there's an air of open support in here. No one is losing their jobs for stating the truth, homes and shops are waving the Palestinian flag. Even the antisemitism, which was rampant, has seen a noticeable decline. People in here stand for Palestine.

I want to also let you know you've been an inspiration for people, or at least, to me. I want to be able to participate more, and I see your reposts and reblogs and I want to do even more than what I did at the start, which was retweeting and reposting and sharing what I can to my friends. Unfortunately due to my current living situation and my terrible memory, I missed being able to donate to the school, but they have stated to open up donations again soon, and I'm preparing in advance for that one. I was not raised Zionist, but I was raised warned against participating in political affairs, saying I'd be put in more trouble, and even could be killed. But I see you and I see so many Americans losing their jobs and being branded criminals and as moral failures for speaking out, and I find it harder and harder in me not to also speak out. And even if I'm not constantly retweeting and reposting, there is something I can do. You helped me realize that, and I'd like to thank you.

I hope this cheers you up even a little, I've noticed your posts these days expressing how much this has been upsetting you. It's been upsetting to all of us, and I want you to know that it's not fruitless, no matter how many western countries and how many bootlickers make you feel otherwise. This ordeal has taught me the world is a brotherhood, politics and money are never a reason for why we should not stand together, and why we shouldn't speak for those having their voice silenced.

Please excuse me if something comes off wrong or unnatural. Like I said, I was born and I live in Egypt, English is not my first language and I still have issues communicating my personal thoughts in it. Please never don't stand for Palestine. Please never lose hope for it, like the Egyptians never have and never will. Please never let people make you feel hopeless and insane.

Thank you for listening to me, thank you for caring about Palestine when it would've been easy not to. Thank you for using your platform, and if you found it in you to read this thing, thank you for giving time to a brown Arab, when the world so strongly encourages you not to. Please continue to inspire justice, and I hope the world one day continues to inspire hope for you.

😭 anon, I cant explain how much I appreciate you sending this message. I know there is hope for Palestinian liberation, I know that we will see freedom for Palestine. But god do I need the reminder sometimes that we aren’t all just shouting into the void. My country of Australia shamefully takes a cowardly stance on Palestine, always deferring to the US to guide our foreign policy, and yet always claims moral superiority over other countries such as yours. Thank you, really thank you so much for sending this message. I feel so so honoured to have earned an audience that includes you. I believe an audience does reflect an artist, and to know I have done you proud in any way makes me feel full.

And please don’t ever feel ashamed of your English, you are eloquent and have a wonderful, compassionate voice, and you have inspired hope in me for yet another day.

[sunshine-jesse]

The Incest End is Not The Bad End, Part 3: The Only End I Know For Real

Alt title: We're roleplaying the endings, not choosing them.

I've focused a lot before on how sickly sweet the chemistry between Ashley and Andrew is and how unproblematic their relationship would actually be under different circumstances, mostly societal ones. I mostly did so to counter the idea that the incest end was primarily a bad end and bring up the assertion that it was the one with the most hope. In doing so, I basically interpreted all of the text within the game in a very positive light, giving off the impression that I think it'll be all sunshine and roses. The reality couldn't be further from the truth? While I think it's the end with the most hope, I ALSO think it'll be incredibly difficult for everyone involved.

As a matter of fact, I think the Questionable end will be the most difficult one to navigate through for Ashley herself.

"But wait," you say, alarm bells ringing in your head, "doesn't she literally fucking die in the Decay ending?"

And I don't think it's that obvious.

First off, why do I think the Questionable end will be difficult to navigate through? After all, Andrew is calm, collected, and Ashley is just a little bit nervous about how he's changing. She also has that ultimate leverage over him, knowing that he's sexually attracted to her and she can use it to keep him by her side. There's little for anyone to worry about, right? Well, no. Not really. As another analyst has pointed out, in the Questionable ending, Ashley has no OTHER leverage over Andrew.

The trinket? Shown to be only situationally useful to them. The future visions don't always show danger, sometimes the demon can just troll them. Sleep? No, he no longer needs Ashley for that. A scapegoat? Not even that. In the Burial ending, he starts to take responsibility for the violence he inflicts on others and has no need to pin the blame on Ashley.

Outside of sex, Ashley is more or less useless to him now, at least in her own mind. Truthfully, Ashley is still the most important person in the world to Andrew and doesn't seem to need a reason to keep her around anymore, but Ashley doesn't realize that; it's part of why she's so confused and uncertain. Their dynamic is changing, and she doesn't like it. But in the Questionable ending, all Andrew has to do is not have sex with Ashley (easier said than done if the fanbase [myself] is any indication) and she'll have nothing left. She'll likely have no other choice but to look inward at this point, especially if Andrew doesn't give off any of the usual red flags that make her think he'd leave her.

There's a good chance at this point that their dynamic will flip entirely. Ashley will be the one who needs comfort, and Andrew shows every indication of being emotionally stable enough to provide it. We'll see some Real Mental Illness instead of Possible To Infer But Maybe Problematic To Do So Mental Illness. Whether or not she changes for the better or worse will likely determine the ending we'll get.

…

Except probably not.

Sane vs Questionable can't be THAT different, or we'd be getting 3A, 3B, 3C, and 3D instead of 3A and 3B. And, y'know what? Now I'm gonna start reaching really hard into theory territory rather than just analysis. So, hear me out here.

Both dreams are canon no matter the ending. The only difference is whether or not Andrew sleeps or not; if he does, the vision he gets is for HIM, and Ashley only incidentally sees it. It's much more important to him than to Ashley, because Ashley doesn't get a clear vision like she did in the motel. If them fucking was actually relevant to Ashley, she likely would've seen it no matter the ending. Her reactions reflect this; at first, she appears weirded out, maybe uncomfortable. Then she finds it hilarious. She considers it as a means of manipulation, sure, but the writing is on the wall: She won't NEED to do so no matter what.

Unfortunately, due to her not being able to open both doors, she won't be able to realize this. Oops!

At this point in time it's basically impossible to ascertain what her own personal vision means. I've given my interpretation before, but I ultimately have my doubts that the specific sequence of events is all to relevant. Most weird dream metaphors are clear parallels to past events, but the dream seems to be a metaphor for what the future will hold. The most relevant part is not the ghosts, but instead how Ashley reacts to what is clearly Andrew's soul. She jokes about trapping it in the bottle, but it being as a joke more than anything is a far cry from how desperate her attempts to keep him normally seem. So what gives? What does this mean?

I think, funnily enough, the Decay ending holds the answer.

My most-distanced-from-a-literal-or-metaphorical-reading-of-the-text-but-is-relatively-easy-to-accept theory is that the choices we are given in the game aren't asking us what we want to see from them, but rather, how we see the characters and their relationship. People are distracted by the idea of choice, but the reality is that we're being asked to roleplay (this is an RPG after all) as the siblings and do what we expect them to do. This isn't about choice. This is about BEING them and DOING WHAT WE THINK THEY'D DO.

Here's what I mean.

If we interpret Ashley as having trust in Andrew and his judgment, then it makes perfect sense she'd trust him with her parents. She might be a little worried, but it's pretty clear that her overwhelming desire to keep Andrew by her side is underscored by genuine love and trust. From there, if we interpret Andrew as having genuine love for his sister and a desire to take care of her, then it becomes everyone else's problem that they can't be together; not his. In killing their parents, he comes to terms with this and self-actualizes. He's willing to take responsibility for the violence he inflicts on others and has no discomfort with dismembering them.

But if you interpret Andrew as viewing Ashley as a burden and a problem, he can't bring himself to save their parents and have a better life because he views himself as too far gone. He hates himself as much as Ashley hates herself for being unable to break free from her influence. He still feels like she's his responsibility, but the love that exists there is greatly muted and overshadowed by his sense of responsibility and a carnal, physical desire for her. Knowing this is likely part of the reason he hates himself; part of the reason he can't let go.

He, crucially, also squanders Ashley's genuine display of trust. It's HIS fault that things break apart, which is why the skull appears over his head when you accept the mom's offer. Ashley genuinely, seriously loves Andrew and wants what's best for him. She's posessive, but her care is a lot less selfish than Andrew thinks, and he can't see that because he's too blinded by his hatred and (partially sexual) frustration to see who she really is.

On the other side of things, if you view Ashley as being a primarily toxic influence that views Andrew as more of an object than anything, she doesn't trust Andrew to deal with their parents and it's HER fault that things break apart, as the skull appears over her head. She sees him as an object, as a child or toy. She sees him as Andy, not Andrew, and can't process the fact that he can change. It's very overbearingly maternalistic, and I believe this specific choice is the only one where Ashley is actually more like their mother than Andrew, eye colors be damned.

In Burial, she wants to share the vision with Andrew, and he wants to share it with her, because their feelings are genuine and mutual and they want to share the experience (because they might get two visions from it, sure, but the principle isn't that much different) But in Decay, she keeps it to herself. She doesn't trust him or his input, either because she doesn't view his feelings as important or because he either almost squandered her trust (if she was listening in), or because he was generally hostile and disincentivized her from wanting to share.

There are other examples too, like when we're allowed to control Andrew to kill the hitman. If we view him as unprepared or unwilling to kill, we empty the whole clip because he's nervous and doesn't want to do this. If we view him as prepared, calm, and in control, he kills in one clean shot without much of an issue. Washing the [REDACTED] out of the shower drain? We basically get to see if Ashley is actually all that competent at housework or not, and if we don't know the right order, neither does she.

This comes to a head in both of the endings.

In the Questionable ending, we're shown that Andrew slept through the dream. We see what he really wants and the depths of his true feelings. He has very obvious romantic feelings for Ashley, and it's not just physical desire. Ashley's very obviously obsessed with Andrew still, but the fact that he can be present in every painting shows that she ACTUALLY views him that way. She's not just seeking validation; her feelings are real, and she knows it.

Remember, this dream is SHARED. We are seeing how BOTH of them feel.

In the Sane ending, Andrew isn't present, and Ashley is never given a chance to view their relationship as anything other than platonic. We don't know how Andrew feels, and we're arguably never given a view into Ashley's true feelings either, because that would-be revelation is cut off by a vision (indicated by eyes). We're just shown what she should do, needs to do, or will do.

Because we don't view their relationship as romantic, light is never shone on the reality of their dynamic. We never see how obsessed Ashley really is (if anything, we're being misdirected by being shown the opposite), and we never see that Andrew has romantic- if buried- feelings for Ashley that can't just be passed off as carnal physical desire. But since it's still the Burial ending, the dynamic still clearly exists; the endings would be too different otherwise. We CHOSE how we see their dynamic in the basement scene.

In other words…

Without love, the truth cannot be seen.

Reader who is in the know: "…hey wait a fuckin' minute" Me: "MOVING ON"

At some point- probably early on- the Sane and Questionable endings have to converge. Andrew and Ashley will have to have the nature of their dynamic laid out for them in a way they can't deny, and the likely only difference between Sane and Questionable will be whether or not Andrew is surprised/embarrassed, or just goes "I guess that dickhead demon wasn't just tricking us after all" and then the route will proceed as normal. Whether or not they have sex will likely be determined by your choices in Chapter 3 itself rather than Chapter 2 with this in mind. Either way, I think Ashley will go through most of the chapter confused and uncertain and will be forced to develop as a person, for better or worse.

In the Decay ending, as said, we're shown that Ashley doesn't even attempt to share a vision with Andrew, so we get to see a vision where Ashley's frame of mind isn't one driven by mutual affection. In this route, we see Ashley constantly running from -something,- and given dreams are metaphors, I think it's reasonable to assume that it's showing us that Ashley is primarily motivated by a fear of Andrew. Fear of what, exactly, isn't really clear; we know for a fact that she's afraid of losing him, but she's also afraid of the violence he can inflict upon her. Either way, she runs away, we can see the demon say "hmmm how interesting," and then we get a vision of the future.

But it's important to note, that vision is a metaphor, not a literal vision of the future. It takes place in the dream world- unlike any other vision, which takes place in the real world- and there are no out-of-frame eyes in the CGs like there are in the Questionable route. Also, (albeit less convincingly), all the eyes are in the background rather than on the map themselves, like they are when we see the hitman vision. The eyes only exist in the background in the Sane vision too, further adding to the idea that they're a metaphor.

So. If it's not a literal depiction of what will happen, then what exactly is it a metaphor for? Okay. Hear me out. This is my wildest fucking theory yet.

It's a metaphor for the Burial route. Or rather, the kind of event that happened in the Burial route.

What we are being shown in the metaphor is a reconciliation of their relationship, where their true feelings are laid bare. We are put in a situation where they are forced to decide how they feel for each other once and for all. If Andrew holds all the power in the relationship but has no control or awareness of his feelings- represented by whether he was composed enough or not to unload his entire clip-, he unceremoniously kills Ashley. Without that awareness, Ashley cannot even defend herself. She has no control because she isn't dealing with someone who has any either.

(Whether he actually kills Ashley or just some abstract representation of Leyley isn't clear, but it doesn't matter much for the purpose of analysis.)

But if Andrew does have that awareness of his feelings- represented by only shooting one bullet- they can negotiate. Because Andrew is in control, Ashley is also in control, and she can make one of two choices:

She can choose to save herself (and either maintain the status quo or just fucking kill Andrew depending on how literal the vision is). With this choice, she lets her fear overtake her and discards Andrew- the cause of her fear- like trash. He is an object that only exists for her sake, after all, and she can discard him just as easily as he seemed like her could discard her during the strangulation scene.

She can choose to trust and accept Andrew. And given a heart appears over her head, she can choose to love him, and overcome her fear, even at the cost of either her life or their prior dynamic (once more, depending on how literal it is).

Decay is asking us if we think Ashley is primarily motivated by selfish fear or genuine selfless love. But both exist either way, and their relationship must be understood and reconciled at some point; this route might honestly be their only hope for a platonic good ending, but it's going to be dismal and painful either way.

So with that in mind, why is the gun not relevant to the Burial route (yet) if it's such a strong metaphor?

Because the reconciling event WAS the basement scene.

We had to make that same choice there. Was Ashley too afraid of Andrew's interaction with her parents to let him handle it? Or did she love and trust him enough to make that choice? In choosing yes, the ball in Andrew's court. If he chooses to care for her needs, their relationship evolves. If he or Ashley refuse make that choice, that can is kicked down the road, and their relationship continues to deteriorate.

Or decay, as it may.

But in Burial, with that reconciling event having happened, the ball is in Ashley's court. With Andrew having come to terms with many of his feelings (minus his sexual desire), most of his arc is finished. There's probably still a lot of him to unpack on the Burial route, but in the Decay ending, as long as Ashley shows love for him, the final choice always falls on his shoulders. And with his final choice having been made in Burial, all that's left is Ashley's.

And what final choice will she have to make?

I don't know, I'm not a prophet.

But either way, she'll still have to make the choice of whether or not to be ruled by her fear of losing him, and desperately try to grasp for control she no longer needs, or cast aside that fear and allow for genuine, mutual love to flourish. Think about it this way: When you see a corpse, how do you react? If you don't care for the corpse or fear it, you stay away and let it decay. If the corpse belongs to someone you love, you tend to it and bury it.

And what do I think the best case scenario is? Well, I've made my opinion obvious, but I think there's one final thing I need to emphasize:

You don't claw at someone's back like a wild fucking animal if you're not really into it.

[putschki1969]

Kaji Fes.2023 Day 2 FULL Video

»»——  CLICK ME 🎁 CLICK ME ——««

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Yes, finally we have a recording of Day 2. Even though I was there for Day 2 back in December, I was still excited to experience the whole thing again. Unfortunately, I never got to write my report so I guess I will use the opportunity to share some of my memories and current thoughts.

Here goes nothing┗(•ˇ_ˇ•)―→

street corner: Looks like they cut this. I am surprised because they had a much longer slot for Day 2 (3 hours instead of just 2) so I was sure they would be able to squeeze all of it into the broadcast but apparently not. Oh well, can't say I am said about that because being confronted with the accordion right from the get-go at the live really didn't leave a good impression on me. I had pretty high expectations for the whole thing and this intro left me more than underwhelmed. Thank God we transitioned right to "希望の光".

希望の光: Now THIS is the intro I was hoping for. What a gorgeous melody! I wasn't familiar with the track but my God, I got goosebumps all over. I literally felt this in my entire body. The gradual build-up to a more grand-scale symphonic arrangement towards the end really impressed me. I am just obsessed with the uilleann pipes and the Celtic sound. I honestly struggle to get beyond this because I keep rewinding the video.

prelude to Act 1: The look on my face when I heard those first few notes. I was shooketh to say the least. I most definitely did not expect them to do the Kalafina block this early in the live but I knew that if they were doing the Madoka instrumentals, the most logical thing would be to transition straight into a Kalafina track. While I have never watched the anime, these are melodies I hold very dear to my heart so I loved this. It was also a great pleasure to hear Eri Ito live for the first time. I will never get enough of Yuki's more classically trained vocalists. it's such a pleasure to listen to them.

Numquam vincar: After "prelude to Act 1" this was no surprise at all but damn, I am so glad they played this. I've never actually had the chance to experience this track live even though they obviously performed it numerous times during Kalafina live intermissions. What a pleasure to be there and truly feel the epicness of that intro. Once more I was covered in goosebumps.

Magia [quattro]: At this point I knew it was coming but it was still a shock to my system. Like I said earlier, I was sure that they would wait until the very end to do the Kalafina block (that's what they had done for earlier lives) so I thought I had some time to prepare myself and get into the groove so to speak. My body certainly wasn't ready so maybe that's why my brain couldn't properly compute the whole thing. I remember not being as hyped as I expected to be and that made me kinda sad. I am so grateful that we are getting this recording and a blu-ray release because I feel like I couldn't fully appreciate the performance while I was there. Getting to see it again is a real treat and I must say, I like this much more than the previous FJ "covers" we have gotten of this song. Hikaru and Keiko sound so perfectly in tune and I just love their powerful delivery. For the most part, I don't mind the higher harmonies provided by Yuriko and Joelle. Although during some parts (e.g. mayowazu ni yukeru nara), I feel like Joelle and Keiko don't harmonise very well together but whatever, it doesn't bother me too much. On a random side note, I wasted way too much time wondering about why I thought that Keiko's arms looked kinda naked until I finally realised that the puffy sleeve pieces of her outfit were missing.

storia: I did not expect this to make it onto the setlist but I am a big fan of the song so I was happy when I heard the first notes. Overall, I think I like this version well enough although I will admit that my favourite part has always been the chorus with Keiko and Wakana so it is a bit jarring to hear Joelle for these parts. Don't get me wrong, Joelle sounds great and I feel like the harmony between her and Keiko works better here than during "Magia" but still, it can't quite touch my heart. I mean, just thinking of all the Kalafina performances where Wakana and Keiko gaze lovingly into each other's eyes while they sing the "yasashii uta..." line makes me tear up. Nothing will ever be able to replace that for me. A few days later I attended Wakana's concert where she also performed "storia". This may sound ridiculous but hearing those performances more or less back to back almost felt as if the three of them had been reunited. Even though this might have been a coincidence, just the idea of this little connection had me in tears.

君の銀の庭: Oh, another cut song. Thank God we are getting the Blu-Ray. I will be honest with you though, I am quite sad that they chose two Kalafina songs that I don't particularly like. I couldn't get as excited as I wanted to be. I think I had no complaints about this performance, enjoyed everyone's vocals and didn't really notice Wakana's absence. But I guess that's because I wasn't a big fan of the song to begin with :P

to the beginning: It will forever be a mystery to me why this is such a fan favourite but oh well, let's not linger on that. In some way, it's almost a blessing in disguise for me to not have such a strong emotional connection to these songs because it helps me appreciate the new versions a lot more. No matter how skilled of a singer Joelle might be, if I am invested in a performance with a prominent Wakana part, there is no way anyone will ever live up to that. It's 100% a me problem, I realise that but I doubt I will ever be able change that way of thinking. Anyways, this was a perfectly fine rendition.

海と真珠: Don't think I've ever heard a JUNNA song. Not a huge fan of her voice, it's just too generic for me. But there's something about this song that I like, especially that those hey-hey woah parts. The chorus is decent too. It's not a track I would skip but also not something I would actively seek out.

太陽の航路: Not my cup of tea. I can tell that there is a nice melody hidden in the chorus but it's a bit too fast-paced for me.

time to sail!: Yet another cut. I loved this. Was already familiar with it from a previous recording so I really appreciated getting to hear t live. It's somewhat of a very epic and grand-scale version of "Umi to Shinju" which I am only realising now XD

The main theme of “L.O.R.D”: Can't tell you how very much I am in love with this song. The first time I got to experience this live was in Taiwan back in 2019. The song is so fucking good, I will never get tired of it. I was utterly blown away by Joelle's vocal prowess. I know it always sounds like I am low-key bullying her but that's really not my attention. I am just forever too hung-up on Wakana to ever be able to accept anyone else taking up my favourite parts of her.

I talk to the rain: Can't wait to hear this again on the Blu-ray.

a song of storm and fire: In my report for Day 1 I did talk about tis and "salva nos" being my first introduction to Yuki Kajiura's music. I feel so privileged to have finally been there for a live performance. Needless to say, it was everything that I could have asked for. Watching the recording now doesn't even do it justice. It was so much more powerful at the venue.

ring your song: This always brings tears to my eyes. The melody is just so beautiful and when they all join in, it's literal perfection.

ことのほかやわらかい: God dammit, I really want to like this song because in theory it should be right up my alley. I mean, the instrumental intro is to die for, it's so promising but then it's just all over the place and I can't get into it T_T

夜光塗料: Not a huge fan of ASCA unfortunately and I do not care for the song either.

雲雀: Surprisingly fond of this. Very nice melody. Can see myself listening to it on a regular basis.

君が見た夢の物語: Not much to say about this except that I enjoyed Keiko's lower harmonies. It's not a bad song per se so I probably would have liked it more if it didn't have ASCA on main.

everlasting song: This is always fun although I do enjoy the version without FJ ASUKA more. I know that sounds horrible considering it's literally her song but I will never be a fan of Yuki's vocalists with a more generic voices. Wakana's "kimi no me ni..." will forever be my favourite!!

世界の果て: No thoughts really.

優しい夜明け: Joelle is a much better fit for this See-Saw song than Yuuka. Very enjoyable.

君がいた物語: A favourite of mine. Do I prefer the version with Wakana? Of course! Do I have fun with this version too? Mostly yeah! Kaori's always work for me here but I can tolerate it.

Rainbow~Main Theme~: This was a nice treat. Very fond of KOKIA as a vocalist and this is just a super beautiful song. Have always liked it.

風よ、吹け: Not as smitten with this new KOKIA song but it's nice enough. I certainly wouldn't skip it

lotus: Wow, two Hanae cuts! How rude!!

inverse operation:

目覚め: I do love the Wakana versions but I also enjoy versions with other main vocalists. And of course, Hanae does an amazing job.

夕闇の��た: I know this didn't leave a good impression on me when I first heard it and I can't say I feel much different about it now.

荒野流転: This upcoming FJ Yuuka corner didn't do anything for me, it was the point where I started to get really tired and distracted. It was a struggle to still pay attention even though these were all more up-beat songs.

Silly-Go-Round: Nope.

cazador del amor: Meh.

nowhere: The only song I actually enjoyed from this corner. ASCA thankfully used a voice that I didn't find too grating (which can't be said about rito, JUNNA and Lino). Almost wish I had stood up for this performance and the next because Keiko was spending a lot of time on the left side of the stage (I had an arena seat pretty close to the stage on the left) but I probably wouldn't have had a good view of Keiko anyway so I preferred to just watch the screen. And to be honest, I am not the type of person to stand up and do some weird moves anyway so it was probably for the best. No need to embarrass myself in front of people who actually know how to move their body.

zodiacal sign: I mean, when is this ever not an absolute pleasure?

into the world: I was hoping to see Hikaru again since almost all the other guest vocalists had had a second appearance and yay, she came back on stage for the final song before the encore! "into the world" was such a perfect ending. I definitely got choked up, especially towards the climax of the song when Keiko was really putting all of herself into it.

red rose: Not my favourite but a good track for all the musicians to shine again.

Parade: It's my favourite song from the album and a fitting ending for this behemoth of a concert. At this point, everyone was close to tears after Yuki's little speech so that made it so much more moving. Love, love, love!! Right after they all take a bow and everyone is leaving the stage, I am glad they zoomed in a bit on Keiko who was wiping away some tears and leaning on Hikaru. That moment killed me at the live.

[dearmura]

new hair, who dis?

☆ cw. some swearing, (not beta read)

☆ pairings. idol! Ni-Ki × fem! reader

☆ synopsis. Jokingly replying to Ni-Ki's latest post, you expected to be left on sent for the rest of life. Instead, you get a reply back...you're joking right?

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

You sigh to yourself for the nth time that past hour, scrolling mindlessly in utter boredom. An image posted a few days ago catches your eye, one of Ni-Ki with his new blond hair. You scoff, could the company make it any more obvious they're having a comeback?

As much as you loved the new look, you couldn't deny your love for his previous Oreo hair. With a pout, you repost the picture, captioning to your few followers how much you hate hybe for changing his hair

As your eyes shift to the clock, you hiss, realizing how unproductive you're being

Peeling yourself away from your pillows, you shuffle your way into your kitchen, practically dragging yourself to your fridge with how lazy you're feeling

Grabbing a bottle of water, you bring it to your lips, about to take a sip when a buzz is heard from your phone

Not having any human interaction that day, you opted for checking the source, guessing somebody messaged you. Not to your surprise, it was nobody, but rather a notification indicating enhypen had made a new post

With enhypen's lack of content in-between promotional periods, you were thrilled to see an update. Shuffling back into your room, you lay back on your bed, clicking the post

You mentally squeal at the image of Ni-Ki posing for a selfie, double tapping your screen with so much enthusiasm one would've thought he'd come to life if you did so. In the midst of your fangirling, you came up with quite the stupidest, most delulu idea ever. To be fair, you had nothing to do, what else could a girl do to keep herself busy?

Opening up your dms, you search for Ni-ki's profile. You're hopeless, really

You scoff at yourself

Clicking on his profile, you conjure up quite the worst first message ever, failing at an attempt to be funny

Wait...have we met before? Cuz you look a lot like my future boyfriend

Before you back out of it out of pure cringe, you click send, immediately throwing your phone to the other side of your bed. You knew that idols don't even open their dms but the embarrassment lingered, nevertheless

After a few minutes of self-hatred, you open up your phone again, too bored to continue staring at the ceiling. Taking another sip of water, you hear a second buzz

You spray water all over your bed at the notification before your eyes. You slapped yourself to make sure you weren't seeing things, unfortunately, the sting on your skin confirmed your greatest fear that you were, in fact, not in a nightmare

I've got to admit, you've wooed me with that one

You scream into your pillow in pure embarrassment, avoiding the situation you got yourself into for a second

Your heart clenches once more when you hear another dreadful buzz

Leaving me on seen now? I thought you were interested, darling😞

You almost scoff at how dumb you looked right now. Nevertheless, you begin typing to not upset him further

If you're a hacker, this guy isn't even that famous, it's not worth it

You joke in hopes of lightening the mood, more for yourself though

Ouch

I come in peace

You giggle to yourself, still not processing your chat with THE nishimura riki

Sorry bub, if it makes you feel any better, I love your new hair, its almost as pretty as you

Almost

You don't know where all this confidence came from but all you know is that you're very obviously flirting with a literal idol. What have you done with your life...

Never thought I'd like being called pretty but here I am

He answered back wittily, making you scoff

Just as you're about to respond, your phone notifies you of a follow request...from him?

How about we make this our little secret, yea?

He texts almost immediately after the notification. Not entirely believing the current situation, you reply

Enough messing around

If you're gonna hack his account, just enjoy your followers and leave me alone

Rather than a text, you receive an image as a reply. A selfie. Of Ni-ki. One you know for a fact he's never posted on any socials

Yea? And what if I told you I wasn't a hacker, princess?

You almost cry, realizing your stupid pick up lines and attempts at jokes were actually received by the real Ni-Ki. Hesitantly, you accept the follow request

Yes, you were embarrassed, but who were you to pass up the opportunity?

Thanks babe😘

He texts back teasingly

Your story from earlier that day pops up with a reply underneath, knowing immediately you were screwed

Wait what happened to liking my hair, princess???

You really hurt my feelings:(((

Blushing in embarrassment for the nth time that day, you couldn't help but want to shrivel up into a ball and die already

Oh God

I'm so sorry

I didn't expect you to see that

I really like your hair

It looks really good on you

Fuck I'm sorry

You panic, tears coming to your eyes, hit with the realization you just offended your idol. Before you could beat yourself up further, you hear another buzz

No worries princess, I like my old hair better too:((

Though I am still a little hurt

Don't think I'll forgive you for that one love😞

Maybe if you take me out I can leave it behind us...

You practically cry at this point. Was he trying to flirt with you? And lowkey asking you out? Knowing you weren't in the right state of mind, you ignore your thoughts, opting for leaving this problem for future you

I uh need to go to bed

Good night, I hope I didn't bother you

You mentally curse at yourself for how stupid you sound

Oh love you could never bother me if you tried

I'll be expecting a reply on that offer next time;)

Sweet dreams angel

Next time? God you were about to throw up. You quickly like his message before throwing your phone, utterly flabbergasted at what just happened. You squeeze your eyes shut, praying what just happened was some weird dream

Fin

Author's note: Wrote this for a drabble request but clearly got too into it🥹🥹

[iamsherlocked-1998]

𝓢𝓞𝓜𝓔 𝓒𝓞𝓛𝓞𝓡𝓢

SUMMARY: Just a moment between a father and a kid.

WORDS: 800

WARNING: Nope, just something soft.

The walk had turned out to be longer than expected, the sun was beating down, his feet were sore with every step, and Ellie had long since stopped complaining of sheer exhaustion, so when they found a more or less safe area it felt like people in the desert saw an oasis.

Luckily, someone had lived there recently but seemed to have left, they saw a generator that had a few days left to work and a water container to wash yourself with.

The girl was the first to enjoy the new comforts, when she was done Joel locked himself in the small bathroom and accessed his sharp jaw while looking at reflection in the mirror. It was true that he didn't have the opportunity to shave during the last stretch of the country they traveled and it was starting to itch. He then looked for something to proceed with the task, but unfortunately he found nothing. It was strange that he could have bathed with scented soap and yet still had to rely on his half-broken razor or scissors, but he bit his lower lip and resigned himself to searching through his worn, dirty pants.

The process was easy, he was almost done when…had a small accident, a piece of clothing fell to the floor distracting him, the fact is that the surface of the knife instead of fixing the hair there removed it, producing a huge bald spot. Horror took over him, maybe they didn't meet many people but he couldn't go out like that, he hadn't gone completely beardless since he was twenty, but there was no other choice, so he sighed and finished the job.

════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ════════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ════

He went down the stairs with determination, feeling refreshed due to the clean clothes they also found a couple of stops ago, he sat down in what looked like a living room and began to put away things they might need, the girl was absorbed in a book that appeared in the house, the subject matter didn't seem very interesting but Ellie liked it. Then she raised head looking at her protector in astonishment, then she let out a laugh.

The former smuggler looked at her with annoyance and a frown. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing…it's just that I've never seen you without…hair there, it's weird (the girl was still recovering from her laughter)."

Joel lowered his head doubtfully. "I just wanted to try something new…this way it's more comfortable, a practical matter."

Ellie showed a big, sarcastic smile. "Could it be that you had an accident?"

"NO (the man mumbled between his teeth, turning his attention back to his task)."

"Okay…okay (the girl raised her hands in surrender). Since you've changed your look…would you let me do something I've been thinking of?"

Joel's first impulse was to refuse, but when he looked at the girl she had a pleading expression, the trip was getting longer, after all even he was bored, at least he could give her this.

He regretted giving in as soon as he saw her with a set of markers and a mischievous grin.

════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ════════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ════

"Dude, why is your chest so hairy? It's ruining my markers!"

It turned out that what Ellie was thinking about was decorating Joel's old tattoos, he hadn't even thought about them in a long time but she is fascinated by them. Currently she was taking on a bullseye drawing he got as a rebellious teenager on his chest, it looked rainbow colored at the moment and she intended to continue the lattice pattern on his back. He had already clear that wasn't going to show her the little elephant on his thigh or the leafless flower behind the ear. At least the giggles stopped.

"And you're starting to ruin my knee by sitting on me like that, come on. Playtime's over, kid."

"What? No! Don't get up, I'm not done yet."

"I just hope you color them, not draw something embarrassing like… boobs"

"I'm not drawing boobs… I'm drawing dicks"

"Ellie…"

"What? Suits you."

The man rolled his eyes and looked down, to find a deer-like print near his stomach. He had to admit that it was pretty detailed for the short time they had been there.

"That's … Where did you learn to paint like that?"

The girl shrugged.

"When we were in Fedra it was a way to entertain myself, and that animal we saw the other day was pretty cool."

Ellie got up to do other things losing interest. The man caressed the colored print on his skin and gave a subtle smile, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to keep it for a while.

NOTE: The fic is based in this post of @elliespuns

Hope you like It, and the lovely Anon too 💕🤗 I used to do this myself with my uncle when I was little. Furthermore, the tattoos that I mention about Joel are based on those that Pedro has.

[amaretigris]

Could I request for cliche story confident jonah simping over a shy, nerdy girl. Maybe angst in the middle and fluff at the end please? THANKYOU

Hey sweetie! Thanks for this request! It's the cutest 🥰 I actually just finished watching Maxton Hall on Prime Video and loved it. This prompt gave me very similar vibes. I hope you like what I came up with 💖💖 (Sorry it took a few days)

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

An Ancient Attraction

Taglist: @hopeisrising @notagreekgal28 @luna2034 @justagirlthatlovedtoread @freyagallileaevans @daydreamerwithnohobbies @mylittlemermaid221 @jonahmermaid23

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Angst & fluff | 4.3k words | TW: Mentions of an abusive relationship

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Sauntering down the halls with his coat thrown over his shoulder, Jonah had his other arm around his mate Max. Throwing his head back in roaring laughter, you sighed at your locker as you watched him and Max pass. There was something about Jonah, the very essence of him, that bugged you. Perhaps it was because he was obnoxiously snobby and conceited; or perhaps it was because you found him so attractive in spite of that. Either way, he irked you. Not that this affected him in any capacity. You were invisible to him. He'd never so much as even looked your direction. You preferred that it stayed that way.

Unfortunately for you, you did have one class with Jonah. History on Tuesdays and Thursdays. The subject that interested you the least. Jonah was also disinterested in this subject- you could tell by his incessant comments and interruptions.

Taking your seat in class, you prepared for another monotonous period. You looked down at your notebook, opening it to your notes from the previous session. Drawing a divider and writing the date at the top, you started a new bullet point. Your professor Sebastian entered, pulling out the chair behind his desk at the front of the lecture hall.

"Good morning class. There's been a change of plans. Today, instead of lecturing as I normally do, we're going to split up for a group project. I've randomized your names to assign you partners. Pass this list around."

Sebastian walked over to hand the list to a front row student. You sighed again, closing your notebook. You hated group projects and forced socialization. You tapped your fingers on the table, waiting to find out who your designated partner was. When you were finally handed the list, your eyes skimmed down the page, and your mouth fell open in dismay.

No way, you couldn't be that unlucky.

Groaning, you pressed your palms to your eyes.

"Whoa, what's all this then?"

You stilled, slowly pulling your fingers away to open your eyes.

"What?"

You snapped back.

"Why are you groaning? Most people would be delighted to work with me," Jonah scoffed.

His arms were lazily crossed over his chest, and he rolled his eyes. Rounding the table and pulling the chair away from you, he took a seat in it.

"Oh, I'm sorry that I'm not a member of your fan club," you retorted.

"Whatever," Jonah shrugged.

"I don't think I've ever seen you before, so I'm not surprised. You must be new here."

You laughed, and it was your turn to cross your arms over your chest. You shook your head.

"No. No, I'm definitely not new. I've been at this university for a year already, same as you."

Jonah smirked, and shrugged again.

"Well, I suppose you haven't done anything notable."

You contorted your face in anger when your professor spoke up again.

"Alright, now that everyone has their partners, you'll be working on a presentation on your assigned ancient civilizations."

Reading from the paper on his table, Sebastian pointed to the paired partners, listing the assignments. He pointed to you and Jonah.

"(Y/N) and Jonah, you have Mesopotamia."

Nodding your head with your fingers laced on your desk, you tried to steady your breath. It was just a presentation. You could get through this.

Sebastian finished reading off assignments, and let the class begin researching.

"Alright," you turned to Jonah.

"I know this isn't your thing, but I can begin compiling facts about ancient Mesopotamia. Can you handle finding pictures for the presentation?"

Jonah, who was looking down at his phone and not at you, grunted in response.

"Hello?"

You waved your hand at Jonah to get his attention. He sighed, locking his phone, and looking at you impatiently.

"What? I don't do group projects. I only stand up there and look pretty for the presentations," Jonah's lips twisted in a smirk.

You huffed in anger.

"You're ridiculous. Have you ever had to work in your life?"

"No," Jonah chuckled.

"Now that you mention it, not really."

You closed your eyes, rubbing your temples.

"Whatever. Let's just get through class. I'll do all the work for the presentation if you stay out of my way."

You missed it, but Jonah's smug expression slipped momentarily.

"Deal," he agreed.

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Later that night at your flat, you began your research. Clicking on a link to a museum website, you found an interesting article on Mesopotamian artifacts. Scrolling down the page, you saw a picture of the woman who wrote the article. Why did she look familiar? Her title read Museum Archivist, Deb Hauer.

Wait. Hauer?

Pulling up the school website, you typed out a message for Jonah.

Is your mom a Museum Archivist at the Natural History Museum?

You didn't expect a reply tonight, or for at least a couple of days. To your surprise, your school email pinged with a reply only minutes later.

Yes. Why?

You rolled your eyes. You weren't sure if this guy was purposely dense or what.

She wrote an article on Mesopotamian artifacts. She's an expert on this subject. Is there any way I can arrange a meeting with her?

Again, you expected no answer. Again, you were surprised when another message pinged.

What's in it for me?

You sighed. This man was infuriating.

How about an A?

You hit send, and closed your laptop. You got up to go wash your face and brush your teeth before bed. You laid down after, opening your email on your phone. Jonah hadn't replied. You rolled your eyes again, locking your phone and setting it under your pillow. This was going to be a long couple weeks.

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The sun shone through your curtains the next morning. Rolling out of bed and stretching, you picked up your phone with a yawn. Opening your email, you saw a reply from Jonah.

I'll see what I can do. Send me your number on here and I'll text you the details.

Pausing, you contemplated for a moment, but shrugged and typed out your number before hitting send. Getting ready for the day, you didn't think about Jonah anymore. It wasn't until that evening after you'd finished all your classes and returned to your flat that he texted you.

Hey. My mum said she's free tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. to give you a tour and answer any questions. That work for you?

You smiled. You were excited to meet a professional such as herself. You wondered how the apple fell so far from the tree.

Yes, that's perfect. Thanks!

Walking to your closet, you laid out your outfit for the morning. A nice top with a pencil skirt was what you decided on. You wanted to look at least a little professional. Jumping into bed, you couldn't wait to head to the museum in the morning.

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Looking out the taxi window at the huge museum before you, you smiled. Paying the driver, you stepped out, and smoothed down your skirt. Walking up the steps, you felt yourself getting more excited as you approached the entrance. Although history was your least favorite subject, the Natural History Museum always fascinated you with its exhibits. They rotated throughout the year, and were always different and seemingly more interesting every time you visited. You entered the lobby, and walked up to the help desk.

"Good morning," you folded your hands in front of you.

"I believe I have an appointment with Mrs. Hau-"

"(Y/N)!"

You scrunched your brow and turned your head. You spotted Jonah approaching you.

"Hey. I can take you to the section where we're meeting my mum," he glanced to you, then to the receptionist.

"I got her from here. Thanks, Margaret," he nodded.

Margaret smiled at him. You looked between the two curiously for a moment. He could be polite and remember people's names?

The revelation shocked you. Jonah caught sight of your expression, and turned to lead you through the museum. You hurried after him. His legs are much longer than yours, and you were wearing platforms. Jonah weaved through the museum with ease, occasionally checking behind him to make sure you were still there. When he finally came to a stop and sat on a bench in a hallway, you plopped down, out of breath. Jonah turned to you with the corner of his lips quirked.

"Was I walking too fast?"

You shook your head.

"No, it's fine. I have short legs, and heels," you managed.

"Do you know this place well?" You tried to change the subject.

Jonah shrugged, looking ahead.

"I suppose. I've come here a lot over the years with my mother."

You strummed your fingers on your leg.

"So, the whole dumb, popular jock persona is an act? You must've picked up a lot being here all the time," you thought aloud.

Jonah sighed.

"I never said I was dumb. People just assume."

He turned his head back to you.

"Like you did," he pointed out.

You swallowed, your eyes scanning his face.

"I guess I did. I'm sorry. You complain a lot in class, and make jokes like you're completely uninterested. I guess you're a good actor," you laced your fingers around your knee.

"Why would you put on that show if you're not really like that?"

Jonah scrubbed the back of his neck.

"I dunno. Everyone has different ways of camouflaging themselves to fit in I suppose. This is mine."

You nodded, turning your gaze to a poster on the opposite wall from you.

"Are your friends actually your friends if they wouldn't accept the real you?"

Jonah was about to answer when he heard heels hitting the tile flooring. He looked to see his mom walking towards your bench. Standing, he extended a hand to you to help you up. Blinking in surprise for a moment, you quickly grabbed his hand to stand and introduce yourself to his mother. The woman before you smiled warmly. She had dark hair and beautiful blue eyes that you immediately recognized in Jonah.

"Good morning Mrs. Hauer," you outstretched your hand for her to shake. She took it firmly.

"Thank you so much for meeting with me. I'm thrilled to be here," you gave her your best smile.

Mrs. Hauer nodded.

"Thank you for your interest. It isn't often that people outside of this profession are genuinely interested in my work."

"I've always been fascinated by ancient civilizations such as Mesopotamia. This school project gave me an opportunity to explore it is all."

You shook your head, realizing yourself.

"Oh, I apologize. I didn't introduce myself. My name is-"

"(Y/N)," Mrs. Hauer interjected.

"Don't worry, Jonah told me. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Your eyes cut to him, only to find his cutting away from you.

"Come, let's begin our tour," Mrs. Hauer extended her arm for you to pass.

Falling into step beside her, you clasped your hands in excitement. You caught sight of Jonah strolling beside you with his hands casually stuffed in his pockets.

"I wasn't aware you'd be joining us for the tour. I figured you'd leave it to me," you mentioned.

"I planned on staying," Jonah shrugged.

"Jonah has been through this museum many times. He could probably give you a tour himself," Mrs. Hauer smiled proudly.

You smiled back, nodding. You heard Jonah awkwardly clear his throat. His mom's eyes moved past you, and you could only imagine Jonah's expression at this moment. You planned on teasing him about that later.

"Right," Mrs. Hauer led you into a show room with multiple artifacts on display in glass cases.

As she began listing off facts and dates, you jotted notes down on your small notepad. You had a few questions throughout the tour, all of which Mrs. Hauer answered adeptly. You followed her through several more rooms, in total awe of the well-preserved treasures. The whole tour, Jonah quietly trailed behind the two of you with his hands folded behind his back.

He observed your reactions to his mother's extensive knowledge, and he had to quell his laughter at your animated expressions on more than one occasion. He had never noticed you before being partnered with you in class, but now he wondered how in the hell he ever missed you. He assumed that was by your own design. But you're so intelligent, kind, and beautiful. You're so uniquely you, and you're unapologetic about it. Had he been living that far under a rock? Perhaps he'd lost himself in this new persona that he projected.

Jonah snapped himself out of it when he heard his mother say his name.

"What?"

Mrs. Hauer chuckled.

"We're done with the tour, darling. Would you like to show (Y/N) around some more? I have a meeting in about ten minutes," she looked at her watch.

Jonah nodded.

"Sure. Thanks mum."

Mrs. Hauer turned back to you, extending her hand to shake yours again. She put her second hand atop yours.

"It really was a pleasure to meet you. Come back anytime," she flashed a pair of dimples at you.

Damn, this man really takes after his mother.

You thanked her again, and watched her walk to Jonah to give him a kiss on the cheek. What you didn't see, however, was that she also squeezed his hand with a wink. You saw Jonah's throat bob with a swallow. After his mother left, Jonah closed the distance between you.

"Well, we can take a look around, and I'll tell you what I know about the other exhibits," he shrugged.

You smiled with your (e/c) eyes bouncing between his.

"Okay. Your mother's wonderful. Thank you for arranging a meeting for me."

Jonah's breath hitched in his throat. What was this foreign feeling blooming in his gut? He fought to tamp it down.

"It's no problem," he admitted.

"I figured I'd at least put forth a little effort in this partnership."

Fuck. Why did he say that?

"Partnership?"

You repeated the word, tasting it on your tongue, and twisting your face into an amused expression.

"I suppose we are partners," you decided.

"I'll admit, my dread about this whole presentation with you has decreased substantially. So thanks again."

You smiled again, turning to walk down the hallway. Jonah absorbed your words for a moment before he caught up with you. The rest of your visit consisted of Jonah telling you random facts he knew about the museum's other displays. You actually laughed and chatted with him. Who knew that was possible? Beginning to see a whole new world open up before you, you decided that you should leave while you had the chance. Jonah took you back to the entrance of the building.

"I have to get going. Thanks again for arranging the meeting, and for the tour after. You're almost as good of a guide as your mom," you teased.

You swore you saw color rising up Jonah's neck.

"See you in class tomorrow," he replied.

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Thursday morning rolled around, and you were a little more chipper than usual getting ready for the day. You told yourself that it was because you were excited for class, but you knew that it was because of a specific person in class. Breezing through your first couple class periods of the day, you walked to history hugging your textbook. Upon entering the lecture hall, you looked past the rows, and spotted Jonah sitting in the chair beside your usual spot.

"Good morning," you chirped, pulling out your chair.

"Morning," he smiled back, locking his phone, and setting it down on his desk.

The two of you didn't have time to exchange much else as Sebastian entered and began lecturing shortly after. Tapping your pencil against your notebook, you cast your eyes to the side. Jonah was listening to the professor, but taking no notes. You nudged his arm on the table with your elbow.

"What? You're a genius who doesn't need to take notes?"

You whispered.

Jonah smirked in response.

"Something like that."

You rolled your eyes, but couldn't help the smile that pulled at your lips. The class period rolled by faster than you expected, and you were almost disappointed that you had to leave. The pleasant warmth radiating from the body beside you had no effect on this whatsoever.

The next history lecture passed by in the same fashion, and you were excited to do your presentation with Jonah for the next class. You'd put together an impressive slideshow, and Jonah had access to some stunning images, courtesy of his mother. He had initially texted you some of the pictures, asking if you liked them. You told him they were perfect to go with the flow of the powerpoint. Truthfully, you were giddy anytime you saw his name pop up on your phone. The feeling was unexpected, but not unwelcome.

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

The day your presentation was due, you picked out your cutest outfit. You wore the same skirt that you had to the museum, but paired it with a bright blue top today.

"The color will compliment his eyes."

Admonishing yourself for that thought, you hurried out the door. You needed to focus. Your first two lectures of the day couldn't go by fast enough. You were constantly checking the time. Your history period finally rolled around, and you hurried to class.

From the other side of the campus, Jonah walked to lecture with his hand in his pockets. A clap on his back signaled to him that Max caught up with him.

"Oi, why are you in such a hurry to class?"

Jonah scoffed.

"I'm walking my normal pace, wanker," he joked.

Max's face twisted in amusement.

"Awfully defensive," he held his hands up in mock surrender.

"You're doing that presentation with (Y/N) today, right?"

Jonah halted his steps to look at Max as his eyes instinctively narrowed.

"Yes, why?"

Max came to a stop in front of Jonah.

"Just be careful with that one, mate. Vanessa heard a rumor that she's dating a senior."

Jonah scrunched his brow pensively. There's no way you would do that. You would tell him if you had a boyfriend, right?

"I doubt it," Jonah started.

"I've never heard her talk about one, and she spends most of her time alone."

"But have you actually asked her?"

Jonah considered the question.

"No," he curtly replied.

Max grimaced. Jonah rolled his eyes, turning to finish his walk to class. Why was he so peeved now?

Things had been going well with you. He sat beside you in class, and the two of you were texting just this morning about what to wear for the presentation, even though you had said your outfit was a surprise. That had only made him more excited to see it.

Racking his brain, Jonah tried to remember any mention of a boyfriend. Surely you wouldn't be so flirty with him if you had one. He'd taken you to meet his mother for gods sake. Sure, it was for information on your project, but that wasn't normally something he did with anyone. He'd even told some women he's dated in the past no when they asked to meet her.

Finally shuffling into the lecture hall, Jonah's mood was pretty well soured until he laid eyes on you. He could see why you'd kept your outfit for today a mystery. You looked almost illuminated with a bright blue shirt that he recognized as the color of his eyes. You were busy stacking papers at your seat, and you missed Jonah's ogling. Tightening his grip on the shoulder strap of his bag, Jonah swallowed down his nerves, and walked to his seat beside you.

"Good morning," you breathed when you saw him at last.

Your smile was genuine and beautiful. Jonah decided right then and there that he would be content with looking at that smile every day.

"Morning," he scooted out his seat.

He cleared his throat.

"(Y/N), I have a question for y-"

"Alright class!"

Sebastian's voice boomed as he entered.

"Let's get started with the presentations. Who would like to go first? (Y/N) and Jonah?"

Jonah rolled his eyes. Damn.

You sprung from your chair, and Jonah reluctantly followed you to the front of the classroom. Loading your powerpoint on the laptop on the podium, you cleared your throat, and stepped back to begin the presentation.

Throughout the whole thing, Jonah found himself watching you like an audience member. He only supplied a few facts on his rehearsed slides, while you provided the rest. Jonah lost track of time, enamored with you. The class applauding was the only signal to him that you finished your slideshow. Shifting his eyes to the class, he gave you a few complimentary claps, and followed you back to your seats.

"There. Aren't you glad we got that over with first thing?"

You whispered to him, nudging him with your elbow again.

"Sure," Jonah smiled.

"Hey, I wanted to ask yo-"

"Okay, everybody quiet down. Great presentation you two. Who's next?"

Sebastian's voice resonated over Jonah's again. Jonah sighed, sitting back in his chair. The two of you sat through a handful of other presentations. Jonah couldn't help but notice that your phone vibrated with a message. You immediately picked it up, and smiled at the screen. His eyes tried to focus on your phone, but he couldn't quite see what you were looking at.

Shit. He shouldn't be trying to look at your phone. That's total creep behavior. He knew that, but he also had this feeling nagging at the back of his throat. What if what his friends had heard was true? What would he do then? He was pretty well ensnared by you at this point. There was no denying it.

Jonah watched you pick up your phone several more times, giggling at the screen. He began tapping his pencil on his notebook. He was getting himself worked up.

"Who are you texting?"

He whispered. The question had escaped his lips before he could contain it. You turned to examine him curiously. He saw defensiveness spring into your eyes.

"Why? What're you playing at?"

Jonah was taken aback. He hadn't expected that response, but what did he really think? That he could just infringe on your privacy like that? He had no claim over you whatsoever. He probably had the least amount of claim over you of anybody, in fact. Scrambling for something to say, Jonah opened and closed his mouth a few times. Your expression shifted to one of anger, and then to one of embarrassment. Before he could even form a response, you gathered up your things, and promptly exited out of the back of the lecture hall.

Fuck. What had he done?

Debating on whether or not he should go after you, Jonah huffed, and snatched up his bag to follow you. Running down the hall, he caught up to your retreating form.

"Hey," he grabbed your wrist.

You turned around, but didn't meet Jonah's gaze. He could tell from how red your eyes were that you had tears in them. You made no move to speak, and only stared down at your feet.

"I'm sorry. Who you're texting is none of my business. Can I take you to lunch, and we can talk?"

Jonah let his thumb caress your inner wrist. Shivering at the soothing touch, you finally let your eyes meet his. His expression was sincere. You felt a pinch of guilt in your stomach. You simply nodded, and let Jonah lead you to the campus cafe. His fingers slid into yours, and you felt goosebumps erupt on your skin. You wiped your face with your other hand as the two of you walked in silence. Sitting down at a small table in the cafe, Jonah pulled your chair out for you.

"I can go order us some burgers. Is that okay?"

You nodded again, and folded your hands on the table. You were slightly shaking. Jonah returned to the table moments later with an order number. He sat across from you, and ducked his head to meet your eyes.

"Hey, talk to me. I apologize again for before. Is everything okay?"

You nodded.

"Yes, I'm sorry for how I reacted," you squeezed your hands tighter.

"I just got out of an abusive relationship. My ex was insanely jealous, and wouldn't even allow me to text my friends without his constant supervision."

"I'm sorry. I had no idea," Jonah swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Truthfully, I was getting paranoid because of something that my mate told me. He heard that you were dating a senior. That's why I asked who you were texting when you smiled at your phone, but I had no right to do so," he admitted.

"Yes, well, I was dating a senior. I ended it last month. He made all kinds of threats against me and himself. I suppose word of that hasn't gotten around yet," you shook your head.

"That's why I mostly keep to myself."

Jonah laid his hand over yours.

"Well, what's important is that you got away from him. He can't hurt you now. Not while I'm here."

Your eyes shot up to Jonah's. He smiled in response.

"You don't know what you're saying-" you started.

"I do," he interrupted.

"You're much too special for me to let you go now, (Y/N)."

A worker brought your burgers and fries to the table, setting the tray down between you and Jonah as your hands separated.

"Thanks," Jonah nodded at the man.

Looking down at your plate briefly, he looked back up at you again.

"Let's eat, and you can tell me everything," he reached to squeeze your hand reassuringly.

"We have an ancient attraction, (Y/N). I'm not going anywhere."

[emillyverse]

This is not an update to the Comic, but it still has something to do with it !!!

(call it a little gift for the Wish Rewrite and KoW fandom)

Hello my little stars! How are you?

I mentioned in the last post in the series that I would be traveling for a week or two and that's why I wouldn't be working. Well I'm still traveling Lmao.

It's been a lot of fun, I'm visiting my Prince Charming and family, both of whom I haven't been to in a long time. Still, I couldn't stop thinking about KoW and Wish's Concept Arts. Disney sealed the fate of its fan artists by discarding so much good material, now they are embedded in our minds and we will not be able to rest until we see them realized. This is crazy but it's beautiful to see how much these discarded concepts generated creative potential in the fandom.

Because of all this I couldn't help but make some small sketches! And well, I came to show them here. They are not sketches of Comic panels, but they have something to do with it and I will show the photos and explain how.

This first one, very faded, are Magnificent and Amable's clothes (designed by @uva124, for the characters in @annymation's rewrite of Wish "The Kingdom of Wishes"). The drawings that Aled did are very complex, I don't judge her for that, in fact I thank her, she gave beautiful clothes to the centuries-old Disney villains and they are perfect. I really wish I could draw them with all the details, but I will do everything by hand, alone and seeking a minimally professional quality (I want to be a comic artist/book illustrator one day. This comic is my first step Lmao, and I want to do something that conveys the best I can give at the moment), so I need to make some things easier for myself. The costumes are one of those things.

" Better something simple and well done than complex and poorly done." — This is my motto for this Comic and for my life.

The next sketches are related to aesthetics. I've been watching a lot of "Analyzing the Art" videos of some Disney films and I was inspired to adopt some "Disney Style" features in my arts for this comic (not everything obviously, because I don't want to be sued by Disney lmao).

What you'll see next is me trying to mix this influence with my own style in some KoW character sketches.

(this last art specifically references a meme in which @rascalentertainments tagged me, Thanks for that, by the way! <3 )

(credits to the artist, I don't know who it is because I was just tagged in this meme and I was busy So I didn't look for more information, but I'll leave the post link and you can check the official credits)

Speaking of aesthetics. Anny received Chiara's aesthetic from someone — the north star, "daughter of Aster", created by his magic at the very end of Anny's fanfic. This Aesthetic inspired me to create an aesthetic for Asha and Aster too and these were the results:

What's your favorite?

Lmao, It took a lot of work to make Aster's. There are almost no things for "starboys" on Pinterest.

I'm leaving this up to you to share as you wish, consider it a gift to the fandom!

Lastly, I want to say that the artistic analysis videos They also inspired me to put together a moodboard for KoW and I'll be leaving it here. Not even Anny and Aled know about this and I can't wait to see their reactions! I wish I could print this painting and leave it on the wall, but unfortunately I don't have a printer T-T.

This moodboard is helping me with the artistic direction of colors, style and is a visual motivation to stay active at work.

I hope you like it too!

That's it for today, it's already midnight in Brazil and I should be sleeping instead of posting crazy things on the internet. I'm going to tag my friends and go to sleep, Lmao.

Kisses full of light and stars!

~ Emy

@wings-of-sapphire @flicklikesstuff @frogcoven88 @chillwildwave @gracebethartacc @gracebethartacc @kstarsarts @oh-shtars Come and get your therapies after the anguish caused by certain publications by Anny!

[cattyanon]

Okay okay okay so I've just been thinking about how a Slay the Princess Sonadow AU would work considering I wanted to go for Sonic taking the place of the Princess and, well, you know how the Princess gets when you commit certain actions... So I was thinking what if he was 'possessed' by Fleetway? And that's also why he was locked away?

Taking some loose Sonic Underground inspiration for characters I'm thinking the backstory is as follows: Aleena has triplets but as Sonic grows up she senses a very suspicious heavy presence inside him that's leaning towards the demonic being side. So she calls upon the best priests but to no avail. It doesn't help that Fleetway (who although perceived as a demon is really just a defense mechanism taken extreme form) takes it as a threat and lashes out, injuring several people before he transforms back into just Sonic. Then they try doing it with Sonic locked up (Sonic is horrified by what he's done and complies with this, plus he's very young here so he's just obeying his mother) and despite actually being able to finish praying this time it doesn't work. Scared and confused, Aleena doesn't release him afterwards. Instead she says that she's going to find a cure for him but until then he was going to be locked away. Both Sonic and Fleetway were very unhappy with this in different ways but they were young and weak so they couldn't do anything.

Unfortunately, Sonic ends up staying down there for years. He has no idea what's been going on above ground but one day somebody comes down with a sword and attempts to slay him. In the end the person is heavily injured and despite hitting Sonic straight on it doesn't do anything. The sword didn't get very far and the wound closed up not long after. This happens lots of times but with different people. With almost every new person that attempts to kill him the sword manages to plunge deeper but none are actually able to- all ending up injured in one way or another.

Why not just send a bunch of people down? Well Aleena has her reasons. She still hopes to cure him but at this point is taking extreme measures.

Then que Shadow... He's escorted to the dungeon and is told that Sonic is near the end to left. They close the door behind him just in case and so he goes and actually manages to slay Sonic, but not before being killed by Fleetway in a last ditch effort at revenge.

And then he wakes back up right as the door clicks shut behind him.

He's confused, obviously. Hadn't he died? Cautiously he makes his way to the cell and is greeted by a half transformed Sonic. He looks less like the predator he had previously perceived him as and more like a scared cornered animal. After a bit of talking instead of just straight up killing him, Shadow manages to get a grasp on the situation from Sonic's end and feels bad. Although still a bit nervous about it, he frees Sonic and the two nervously make their way back up.

But the moment Shadow is seen with Sonic out of his cell they attack the both of them despite Shadow having tried to explain the situation. They both end up seriously injured and Shadow succumbs to his injuries.

Then Shadow wakes back up at the entrance to the dungeon...

[bettsfic]

How do you take care of your responsibilities and still make time to write? Any tips for a writer who likes to write all day if she can(even if it means putting things off)?

unfortunately this is one of the biggest problems in my life. left to my own devices, if i'm interested enough in a project, i can work on it for twelve straight hours, only stopping to begrudgingly eat and go to the bathroom, totally unaware of the passage of time.

to someone who doesn't understand what that's like, the answer might be "moderation!" or "take breaks :)" but that is far easier said than done. the fixated mind is fixed. everything has to move around it.

i recently met with an astrologist (i'm not big into astrology but i'm always looking for insight and new lenses through which to view the world). she was more than an astrologist, though--she did a whole report thing on me and we had a 2 hour chat that was very illuminating.

one of the things she told me was that i was a person of seasons, and that i existed perpetually in a marketplace of my mind.

what she meant is that seasons are bigger than you. you adapt to them; they don't adapt to you. when it's cold, you need a coat. when it's raining, you need an umbrella. and at the marketplace, seasonality affects the produce you buy, and therefore what you eat. seasons affect everything about your day to day life. we can't control them. we can only prepare for them.

what she said gave me permission for my life to revolve around my work and not the other way around. i used to see writing as something inside of me, but really i'm inside of it.

initially i found the idea of seasons counterintuitive: if i revolve around the work, what about things like exercising? her answer: find ways to exercise that serve the season. what about socializing? her answer: invite your friends to do things that serve the season.

i was hesitant, but i tried it. i'm still trying it. i've begun giving myself over to everything in a state of perpetual self-accommodation. my only job is to attend to the season. if writing is winter, when i'm snowed in and can't go out an do things, that means as soon as the weather breaks i have to haul ass to prepare for the next major storm. i use the time to reset my sleep schedule if i need to, cook food and freeze it, go to doctor's appointments, get my oil changed. things i can't really do when i'm neck deep in a project.

i'm still trying to figure out how to serve the season about some parts of life, but i've found that a chain reaction has begun that's slowly beginning to alter the way i manage myself. the first way of serving the season was the easiest: i stopped reading what i thought i should be reading, and started reading what i wanted to read, for as long as i wanted to read it. that means putting down books the second i get bored with them, rotating through a chapter or two of a dozen books instead of reading one all the way through. and i started seeking out books that i thought related best to the season. reading is something i struggle with because it's my job, and so picking out what to read for funsies can be tedious. but if i'm always focusing on what's going to help me most with whatever i'm working on, i'm always invested. right now i'm reading van gogh's biography which is informing what i hope to be my next novel. and it's a thousand goddamn pages so i've been reading it for 4 months (i read slowly and take a lot of notes).

with my head immersed in the long, agonizing tragedy of van gogh's life, i decided to leverage that to tackle something else i've always struggled with: exercise. i went on a walk one day and listened to a podcast. but i have an audio processing problem and moreover the talking in my head is always louder than people talking to me, and so worse than the physical toll exercise takes on my body, i find listening to things absolutely exhausting.

i couldn't find a podcast to serve the season in a way that would outweigh my listening fatigue, so i had a brilliant idea: read and walk at the same time. it looks a little weird, but that's the thing about self-accommodating: it gives you permission to be strange in public. i have a kindle, so it's not too onerous, and i live in near a walking track at a park that's very smooth so i don't have to worry about tripping. and my god, what a game changer. for the first time in my life i'm looking forward to going outside and doing things.

i only started trying to understand my seasons a few months ago, so i don't know all the ways to serve them yet, but these are the trials that have worked for me so far. i still have a long way to go.

[peetasallhehasleft]

"She’s chosen Peeta, she just has to wait for him to choose her, again", I just read this among your comments, I hope it´s yours. I want to ask you: if Katniss has chosen Peeta by the end of CF, why she was comparing the two boys and what she got/get from each one by the end of MJ, before telling Peeta "real"? Thanks in advance.

This was sent to me back in 2014 when I was getting so many asks it was nearly impossible to keep up with them all, but seeing as I've been thinking about this myself a lot lately, I figured I'd dig into my good ole meta bag, and see what I can come up with.

The more time has gone by, the more I've thought about this very thing. I think the easiest and most concise way to sum this up is the vast difference in wording between these two things...

"I need you" - which she says to Peeta and about Peeta. She needs him.

"Gale. I'll need him with me to do this." - when she's listing her demands to Coin.

She needs Peeta, in general. Completely. Gale she needs for a time, to help with something specific.

Reminds me a lot about the quote, Some people come into your life for a reason, or a season, or a lifetime.

Now let me expand on that: Reason - Gale, his purpose in the end was to show her just how different viewpoints can change things for better or worse. He's willing to make sacrifices and take chances that she never would, sometimes it takes someone else doing something we never could imagine ourselves doing, to see just what is so bad or horrible about the thing. The world was bad and it needed to be fixed, but not the way that Gale was willing to make it happen. She didn't agree with him. Ultimately, his desire for victory over that of the value of human life, (and that his bomb be it in theory or practical application) killed her sister. He aligned himself with Coin, and she was just as bad (or worse than) Snow. The world couldn't move on with another Snow. Season - Finnick. This hurts me so much to even write since he's my favorite character, I'll never not cry when he dies...book or movie, but I digress. Finnick comes into her life exactly when she needs him. She needs him to help save Peeta, she needs him to help her save herself from her deep dark depression, she needs him to help unmuddle Peeta's mind, she needs him to unfortunately die so she can do what needs to be done. Their ideals were aligned, they both saw the horror in war, and the devastation that POW can have on someone. They helped each other through. For a time, they needed each other. Lifetime - Peeta. Her "I need you" wasn't just in that moment. "I realize only one person will be damaged beyond repair if Peeta dies. Me." In so many aspects she gives up parts of herself to save him. Yeah, it takes a lot longer than it probably should have, but she was a girl who couldn't come to terms with her own feelings without feeling like they were fabricated. She struggles, I think, until this very moment on the beach. She is devastated over and over again, between Peeta's interviews and how he behaved to and with her in 13. She wouldn't answer his question straight, "Everyone says I did. Everyone says that's why Snow had you tortured. To break me." Also interesting how when she's trying to be evasive she uses the word "everyone" implying that there's not a single person in her life that didn't think that way.

So yes, she gets them mixed up in her head, but it's different. She doesn't feel she deserves Peeta, and Gale would be so easy to be with because of their common ground until Mockingjay. Gale becomes someone unrecognizable to her, and Peeta comes back. He needs for them are different, and she doesn't need Gale to survive. She needs Peeta, because only he can give her the things she truly wants in life.

"...what I need to survive is not Gale's fire, kindled with rage and hatred. I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again. And only Peeta can give me that."

Their whole relationship he struggled with whether it was real or not, which is the entire significance of the end of the book...

So after, when he whispers, "You love me. Real or not real?"

I tell him, "Real."

It's almost like an echo of Snow's "I thought we agreed not to lie to each other." Real or not real was the most sincere thing that existed between them post-hijacking...because it was the truth.

Now please excuse my sappy self, I just love them so much.

[fernlessbastard]

Just thought I'd send you some positivity and thoughts, after reading your stories. (They were just wonderful, by the way).

I love the way you depicted Wilbur. A man who has longed for physical touch, attention, and (honestly) Quackity, for thirteen years. God the way you depict him is absolutely splendid. I couldn't have done it better!

Making him desperately beg for Quackity's time because even though he's a prick who wants nothing more than to be on top, he also lacks that attention that only Quackity can give him.

Versus Quackity who is stand offish. Had only ever been hurt physically. It takes him awhile to let Wilbur touch him, to open his walls and allow them to break down enough for Wilbur to slip inside of that crack. It's so gorgeous.

I love them so much, and you are such an awesome writer I hope to read more by you. [:

-🎲 anon

;-; thank you so muchhhh you made my entire week with this

I was planning to post chapter 2 over the weekend but I didn't have enough time to edit and all that, so instead I'll try to post it this week between Wednesday and Sunday

It's actually so frustrating, cause it's literally basically ready. I edited it thoroughly already, and had it beta read, but then during that I had it pointed out that I overused/repeated like three or four words (it's over 7k words so unfortunately unintentional repetition is easy) so I had to decide where to keep them and where and with what to replace them. So now I could honestly post it already, but I just have to make sure the changes don't impact the flow, so I need to find the time for both myself and my partner (who's my beta reader) to separately read it quickly in one go

Like I wish so hard I wasn't such a perfectionist cause it's genuinely ready to get posted and the likelihood that something's still even slightly wrong is tiny, but noooo, I still gotta perfect it to my very last breath or something

Anyway I'm not trying to justify myself (I know you're all great and respectful, guys, dw), but I'm more so just kinda venting cause it's an irritating situation

I just want to post it for you already ok I'm excited to read your comments and asks and all of that - reading your thoughts (whatever they may be, even more negative) always a highlight of my whole month (just, having people engage with my art✨✨✨)

Oh also just as a last little note: if you think I've already portrayed Quackity as a hurt, traumatised man, then you're not ready for the rest of IUTMTM--(/lh/aff/pos) Let me tell you they both need therapy bad and the worst kind of miscommunication is misplaced trauma response responded to with another trauma response-- There will be pain

[greatqueenanna]

Have you heard about the new short in front of Wish and how they're using Hans as a punching bag again? I'm just so tired of Disney doing the same thing over and over again. It feels like they're personally attacking his fans. Like, we get it. Can you stop now?

I've read rumors and spoiler posts about it, yes.

First off, I want to see the short for myself first before I pass any real judgment. I'm sure the short is fun and harmless, and one thing I'm excited about is seeing Hans again in (what I presume) updated animation since Frozen. He showed up in Frozen Fever, but it was from a distance so you couldn't really see him too well.

More thoughts on this below the cut. It's a bit long and I didn't want to crowd everyone's feeds.

Second, on the subject of Hans being treated as a joke, I agree to an extent.

I do think that Hans isn't being treated the same way as other villains. Disney Villains, even when they have done pretty gruesome things, are given fun merchandise, songs, or promotional opportunities for their films or the 'Disney Villain' brand - at the very least they get some toys or t-shirts. Hans, on the other hand, barely gets any merchandise and is usually not featured in villain-related promotions. I think the last time Hans was present in anything was his Villain/Hero doll set he had with Elsa and the A Frozen Heart novel that was retconned by Forest of Shadows.

I would really love it if they brought him back in a meaningful way, instead of just random cameos that joke about his douche-ness. We get it. He's a douche. Can we expand on this character a bit more now? Maybe give him an opportunity to prove himself as a villain?

However, even with all this being said, I think the reason for this treatment is because of the uniqueness of Hans' overall character. Not only was he a twist villain, but he was a romantic interest for Anna - making him a little too realistic for many people.

Yes, characters like Frollo and Gaston also share the qualities of men trying to take advantage of women, and Mother Gothel does indeed show signs of a realistic abusive parent. But they're shown since the beginning that they are villainous, which helps the audience know to emotionally disconnect from them. This is the same for most villains.

Hans was shown to be desirable and then changed, which is what realistically happens when people are trapped in abusive relationships. We form attachments to these types of people and it's hard to just disconnect. It's difficult to just place him as a 'deliciously fun' Disney villain with the others when he hits too close to home.

This is why we see less of a fun side to him, and why we are often just shown him being a punching bag. Hans didn't just betray Anna, he betrayed the audience as well.

"But there have been other twist villains, like Callaghan, Mayor Bellwether, and Turbo."

Yes, but did these characters really have the same emotional attachment as Hans did? Not really. Callaghan came close, but we barely saw him interact or have an emotional connection to Hiro. Bellwether and Turbo (as King Candy) were nice to their protagonists, but again, didn't have that emotional attachment to them. Hans was Anna's light of hope after we saw her suffer during her childhood, and then he turned on her when she needed him the most. Remember the plethora of reaction videos to his betrayal when Frozen first came out? Hans is a pretty big deal.

I don't agree with the conclusion that this is meant to be an attack on Hans' fans. Sorry, but the Hans fandom is, and was never, big enough to warrant such a response from Disney and we barely agree with each other on everything. If there were hundreds of fans bombarding Frozen and Disney posts, then maybe I would believe it. However, if you actually look at Twitter, it's literally the same three or four people just insulting Jennifer Lee and spreading the #FireJenLee and #RedeemHans tags. That's the only Hans Fandom presence on Twitter, unfortunately.

[entomophagouserisian]

Incoming: some weeb shit I've folded one of my favorite math things into (permutations)

So I recently went back to Revolutionary Girl Utena because my girlfriend hadn't seen any of it yet and I hadn't seen much beyond season 1 (I know it's a foundational work of sword lesbianism and regret not having gone harder on it before).

I was kind of laughing with her about how edgy the translated lyrics of Zettai Unmei Mokushiroku (Absolute Destiny: Apocalypse, the song that plays during the scene where Utena climbs up to the arena every episode) and I noticed that there wasn't a translation for a chant at the end of it that hits my ear in a very pleasing way.

The chant in question:

Mokushi Kushimo

Shimoku Kumoshi

Moshiku Shikumo

The reason there is no translation is that it's mostly gibberish. They took the word "Mokushi" (Apocalypse) and rearranged the syllables in all possible ways to create this particular piece of poetry. The repetition of syllables in this way ends up feeling really good to my brain when I hear it and I have therefore been alternating between trying to memorize it and analyzing its structure for the past few days.

Unfortunately in order to present my process for this analysis I'm going to have to teach you some basics of the mathematical conception of permutations.

(The following aside into math is actually wholly unnecessary to my overall analysis, so feel free to skip to the clearly marked conclusion at the end if it feels like too much or you just don't feel like engaging with it)

A permutation is any reordering of a set of objects. Note that it's just reordering, it doesn't include deletions or the introduction of new elements or new copies of old elements. Commonly if we want to analyze permutations directly, and more specifically to talk about the permutation where the first object goes to 2nd position, second object to 3rd, third object to 1st, we use (123) (read as 1 goes to 2, 2 goes to 3, 3 goes to 1). As well, if the 3rd object stays put and the first two swap places, we would use (12) (read as 1 goes to 2, 2 goes to 1) to describe that. If no change is made, we usually just use (1) (read as one goes to one or the identity) to describe that. (This is very much lacking the rigor and generality that I would've preferred, but this post would've been substantially longer if I'd gone into that much detail, so I'm kind of hoping someone can come in with just this much explanation and understand what comes after)

So my first step in my analysis was to try to record how each of the "words" related to the base/actual word Mokushi (this is admittedly where it would be quite useful for me to change over to hiragana, but I don't know it and don't have a keyboard downloaded for it and don't feel like downloading one just for this post or copy/pasting the hiragana repeatedly, sorry to those of you who study/enjoy Japanese)

So, rewriting the chant as the permutations applied to Mo-Ku-Shi (written this way to emphasize the 3 objects being permuted):

(1) (132)

(123) (12)

(23) (13)

It was fun but didn't get me anywhere (other than verifying every possible ordering was present, but I was already pretty certain of that) so I instead chose to look at what permutation is happening at each step in the sequence rather than just how they compared to the original:

* (132)

(132) (13)

(132) (132)

Here, we see a much more obvious pattern. For all but one transformation, we are permuting by taking the first syllable and pushing to the end, moving the other two toward the beginning of the "word". To hear it, it is very easy to recognize the 2-syllable repeats happening throughout that first pulled my attention. However, this one permutation couldn't be done exclusively if they wanted to cover all possible permutations, as applying (132) 3 times brings you back to the original word, so the third Permutation is instead (13) which just reverses the syllables in this case since there's only 3 of them, but this also notably changes them to a "word" not yet seen which can bring us to the two we are still missing by applying (132) two more times.

It was after all of this that I properly noted that that middle step reversed the previous "word" and I mentally zoomed out to notice

~~~~Conclusion~~~~

the chant is set up to mirror itself. The pairs 1&6, 2&5, and 3&4 are all the reverse of one another, ordered such that for all but one pair heard in sequence, there is a 2-syllable repetition when moving from one word to the next. (Yes it took me this long to notice it was mirrored. No all that permutation work was definitely not necessary, but forgive a [likely autistic] math nerd for her indulgences.)

It's just a silly chant in a cartoon but it made me happy to see permutations in it and I am sincerely moved by the poetry of making gibberish out of a dark and serious word like apocalypse by listing off anagrams.

[singsweetmelodies]

tagged by lovely @car-bo-hydrate to try this <3333

star sign: virgo

favourite holiday: new year

last meal: a hot mug of tea and some south african buttermilk rusks (comfort food breakfast!!! ❤️☕)

current favourite musician: probably taylor swift, but as always, it's hard to choose just one. OOOH! lately, dove cameron is high up on the list too

last music listened to: confetti (acoustic version) by little mix - LISTEN. ever since ms perrie edwards put out a tease that her solo music is coming soon, i have been on a big little mix high again, listening to all my old favourites and hyping myself up sooooo much for that perrie music drop 👀👀👀😍

last movie watched: my girlfriend and i rewatched shang-chi and the legend of the ten rings again last night for movie night <3 LOVE that movie, omfg. both my gf and i firmly declared all michelle yeoh's scenes our favourites 🤭

last tv show watched: you know, it's actually been really long since i've properly watched a TV show, so the answer to this is probably something silly like reruns of FRIENDS

last book/fic finished: 2 different answers here!! last book was iron flame by rebecca yarros (yes, i caved to all the hype and read it on the plane - yes, there were bits that pissed me off, but i mostly enjoyed it) and last fic was one of AO3 user venerat's landoscar masterpieces, "i'll kiss you first" <3

last book/fic abandoned: hmm... i tried to read this rom-com called "you & me: a mlm single dads romance" while on holiday in SA, and i just... couldn't make it more than 5 chapters in. the cringe (& the VERY american focus of... everything...) was just too much for me, especially because i tried to read this right after a super delightful wlw rom-com recommended to me by darling @duquesademiel. after that, this one just... couldn't compare. at all.

currently reading: well, i'm back to work, so my time for books has unfortunately dropped exponentially... all i'm actively reading rn is a bunch of f1 rpf fics, to be perfectly honest

last thing researched for writing/art/hyperfixation: "WHAT COULD CAUSE A SCANDAL IN THE REGENCY ERA" 🤣🤭

favourite online fandom memory: storytime sundays where we tell those long DM fics with @boxboxbrioche and @welightitup <3333

favourite old fandom you wish would drag you back in/have a resurgence: HMMM! i am mostly over all my old fandoms by now, to be fair, but if i really had to choose one... probably one direction?? because a proper resurgence would mean the reunion, right? (right?) ((so maybe i'm not quite as "over it" as i pretend 🤭))

favourite thing that you enjoyed that never had an active fandom: ohhhh, i can't think of a name immediately now, but it's definitely some or other book series that, if it had a fandom at all, was so tiny that i was practically the only person in it 🥲

tempting project that you're trying to rein in/don't have time for: LISTEN. i have had the most awful writer's block for months, and now that i can finally write again, somewhat, all that i want to write are the things that i should NOT be focusing on rn, because those things don't have deadlines but other things do *charles_wtf discord react*

prime example: about 2838474829 piarles smut WIPs and a/b/o and chussyverse explorations, instead of... my PWFE fic. some belated birthday fics. some celebration fics i promised nearly half a bloody YEAR ago. oops 😭😭 but, we'll get there. we will! just like this will be ferrari's year (i am delulu) xD

no idea who's done this yet and who hasn't, so i'm just going to tag some friends and hope i'm not double-tagging anyone - also, if i miss anyone, please feel free to say i tagged you anyway, because i'd love to see your answers <3 @boxboxbrioche @welightitup @hourcat @teamnick @sedicii @francophones @radiocheck, if any of you feel like giving this a go <3333