#but i think it's a shame he doesn't get a lot of in depth analysis

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I hope people know that when I say I really like Mori, I don't mean that I actually like him, I mean that I want to dissect his brain under a microscope.

Creepy mafia doctor man who has committed war crimes and would do so again without any compunction, but only for the sake of a goal. Why are you the way that you are.

[sharonisthebettercarter]

billy butcher and addiction--

felt there's a need for a good and proper analysis for this fucker (as well as i can manage, maybe throw in a bit of a rant on poor fandom etiquette, 'three laws of fandom' are an oldie but a goodie lol) so here we go i guess--

i wanna start by saying this is a full scope character deep dive (sortaish?? best i can do take it or leave it--lol i might go further in depth on specific scenes or whatnot later, i'm longwinded but i'm tryin' to condense as best i can for this, aaaaaaaaaaand long long post ahead--) that def includes elements solidly confirmed in dear becky and probably leans more on comics billy overall, but def does intertwine and interlock with show billy (as they are essentially the same, garth ennis' own words went something like 'he's a perfect billy butcher' lol)

i'll try to avoid spoilers (??) for the most part like dear becky, but there are some things that may need more context (there is quite a bit of in the show that works well enough to represent anyway but i guess we'll see how this goes, i may end up talking more about the show elements and how they parallel with comics billy anyway)

i also think it's worth mentioning that there's a lot to billy (especially in the comic) i feel fandom either ignores, dismisses or doesn't want to acknowledge, or just doesn't notice.

whether from personal bias/prejudice, desire (fitting billy into that 'alpha's alpha' toxic masculinity 'dom top' fever dream 'mold' so to speak, probably--no, definitely the *worst* way to interpret and easiest way bungle up his character, it completely misses the fact that billy has built *that* 'daddy approved' version of himself as a *facade* to *hide* his own shame and insecurity, and he is *so* much more complex than that nonsense (and genuinely uncomfortable and unhappy being that way-beyond the subtle guilt of a constant high). can we talk about the ways in which fandoms promote and perpetuate toxic masculinity--what, no time we'll be here all week?? oh, okay. jesus fucking christ that is exactly as bad if not worse than the maga chud interpretation and unironic worship of homelander--), lack of personal experience/familiarity, understanding--fuck it, even lack of education in media analysis or reading comprehension (if not both), and *especially* being pro-censorship/americentric/*stuck* with purity culture blinders (or even some part of them lingering)

all of those can def make media (and characters like billy) that isn't 'cookie cutter america-approved' fairly difficult to understand or accept (i guess??)

i've seen so much listed to hell and back in attempts to describe comics billy. 'he's a piece of shit' *YES*. 'he's just wish fulfillment for the author's hatred of superheroes' *no*??? let me not get into the complete hypocrisy of someone who writes or enjoys fanfic--the epitome of *wish fulfilment*--unironically complaining about other authors doing this and thinking it's a legit complaint. how does *anyone* read the entire story and come to *that* conclusion???

did you even bother reading the comic? no, i don't mean glossing over it with a completely closed mind while actively ignoring and dismissing everything important put in front of you and designed to make you think because the blood and guts or other is too distracting apparently, i mean *actually* reading it thoroughly and making an effort to think about what's being presented and why, waiting for the drop *instead* of jumping to judge (as is the american way)

and to some degree, i get it. i wouldn't say this comic is the easiest to digest (especially if completely unfamiliar with many of the themes presented, even the show has sparked some ass takes and interpretations) there's also plenty of common misconceptions, one in particular about garth ennis 'hating' superheroes. this is actually not true, what he hates is how the superhero *genre* has bottlenecked the comics industry and what is more likely to see success in it (and as a fellow creative, i completely understand how frustrating that would be, his main interest is actually war stories)

it's def one thing to say, 'nah, i don't vibe with the style' or 'it's not really for me/my taste but it's fine if others like it', i get that, satire and horror aren't for everyone. honest critique is fair even.

but it is a whole 'nother thing entirely to pretend your own personal tastes are *the only 'correct' creative law* and then *vehemently* oppose or hate something an artist created and denounce, harass, or fuck--dehumanize the people who enjoy it, if not the artists who work(ed) on it.

i'm sorry, this is a tangent cause it's def not limited to the hate the boys comics or ennis gets *at all*, it's especially prevalent in *literal* kids media like teen titans go where the thing in question is simply put--*NOT MADE FOR THE SHITHEADS NONSTOP COMPLAINING ABOUT IT* when they can literally, *LITERALLY* just *accept* that they weren't the *target audience* and move the fuck on with their day, happy as can be. *instead* of shitting on something *or the people who like it* to make literal *children* or other people feel bad about liking it.

it's one thing to try and educate people or have discourse and discussion, it is another entirely to *bully* them over something so *stupid* as *fiction*.

i especially have a problem with this shit when i have *several* artists tell me that they don't feel *safe* or *welcome* being themselves, liking or creating what *they* want to make in a fandom *because* of the fandom attitude and normalization of *hate* within that fandom.

i *thought* fandoms were supposed to be about *love* so what the fuck is this human tribalist false dichotomy bullshit??

and of course, that's not always the case. there is also an unbelievable level of respect that is given to fanartists and fanfiction writers, and that is *beautiful*. 'don't like, don't read'. *PERFECT*. curate your own content, complain or rant in your own spaces--you're entitled to an opinion, but *accept* that it still has a right to exist and other people still have a right to love it (and aren't wrong for that, opinions cannot be objective), *even if you don't like it*. just don't engage then, it's that simple.

now extend that level of courtesy to the people, artists and writers in the industry.

no, i'm not trying to shut down criticism of media, proper critique is how we learn and grow and understand better and in turn *create* better. yes, they can fumble the fucking bag too, especially when adapting something from a source material and--like *some* fanfic writers out there--think they can do it 'way better'.

but the people in the industry? who bend over backwards, going on strike in some cases, breaking their necks to work on and create the things that we *love* and latch onto?

they're people too. and whether the thing they make goes *exactly* how we want or not, however you feel about the money in the entertainment industry (which they see barely a dime of if those fucking strikes and constant mistreatment are any indication), they don't deserve to be treated like scabs.

that mentality of 'not my personal taste = universally bad' and 'anyone who disagrees with my opinion is wrong' is fucking gross and *extremely elitist*, just straight up announcing how pretentious, obtuse, willfully arrogant and ignorant, and *lacking in self awareness*--the number one easiest way to be the *shittiest* kind of artist/writer/critic--you are. it is *exactly* like cishet white men complaining about something being 'bad' because it's 'woke' or has anything *besides* a cishet white man for the protagonist.

*god forbid something isn't tailor made specifically for them.*

swear to gawd, i got a list of different bullshit and circle jerking i've seen all across different fandoms for different reasons. no i'm not mad at any one person in particular, just a little salty from recurring problems and gatekeeping (ghoulfucking-GHOULFUCKING OF ALL THINGS I--I CANNOT) if not straight up bullying (does it really make a bitch feel *so* much better to try and hurt other people for liking what they, and let's be honest, are not willing to give the time of day?) in fandoms. (the complete audacity of people to complain about a media being 'childish' or 'bad' because 'insert nonsensical trivial bullshit here that holds no weight because it's personal taste if not flat out wrong and not actual critique' and then turn around and throw the biggest fucking tantrums about it--let me not get into the whole sharon carter debacle jesus christ--)

same shit. different pile.

also, fuck me. i keep *forgetting* that genuinely valid critique (*not* personal taste/opinion, proper critique pertains to things like techniques used, composition, narrative consistency and plot holes, goals of the artist/writer, accomplishments of those goals, etc.) is something that needs proper education and understanding all on its own which not a whole ton of people get or even know, which just goes to show--i'm a dumbass too. (but i won't deny that plenty of 'critics' are full of shit and *know* this but use their 'personal taste' as 'critique' *anyway* because... they enjoy being complete assholes and discouraging other artists i guess.)

y'all, take a class or two in art critique and literature analysis. you'll learn all the cool lingo (to later forget if you're like me~), and maybe (hopefully) walk out with a bit more of an open mind wanting to encourage more art in the world, even if you don't personally like it. take a moment to *listen* to differing opinions in their *entirety* and you might even gain a new perspective.

*no one* should be ashamed to ask questions or admit they don't know or understand something and fuck the people that would make you feel that way. *we can and should help each other.*

but stagnant or hostile fandoms with no self awareness and perpetuated elitism circle jerks? *really* fucking shameful, regardless of the form or where they are.

ANYWHO--

ugh, fuck. okay. i think i'm done with that tangent, back on topic--

BILLY BEAN~<3

and i want to reiterate that *again*, dear becky *does* confirm pretty much everything i'm going to discuss here tho technically speaking, nothing is spoiled here as it's just reiterating what is implicit (if not stated outright) throughout the series.

as far as dear becky goes, it's a good final gut-wrenching piece to the series and i loved it, but it definitely leaned on more of 'tell' instead of 'show, don't tell' (no duh in context, but probably because the rest of the comic did the 'show'--very well imo but it still flew over peoples' heads and made them misplace their brains--i'm sorry, i've just lost so much patience for the lack of reading comprehension and media literacy, but honestly? ennis is genuinely too good at knowing how to spark a strong emotional reaction in readers. and can we talk about the dense mofos that *make* authors have to 'tell' just to confirm something that is heavily implied--what, no time? oh, fuck, fine.)

OKAY--

addiction.

what about it, and why am i mentioning it. well. because if it's not clear by now, william butcher is an addict.

and it is one of, if not the core element that drives him to do what he does.

not becky or becca. not justice.

addiction.

and i don't mean traditional substance abuse (though he admits there has been as much in his life, especially with alcohol, his drug of choice is a bit more complex and maybe not so easy to spot on the surface for those unfamiliar with addiction).

in the show, we even see him mention that he's 'done 'em all' and there's *nothing* like temp v--and it's because temp v *amplifies* his *addiction* to the highest level it could exist on.

something else to note, there's a ton of stigma and widespread (ableist) misconception surrounding addiction still (which may be part of why people may not want to recognize it in billy), but it is absolutely a clinical mental disorder and people who suffer from it should be treated as *medical patients*, not reduced to violent criminals and scumbags. (fuck you drug war and prohibition, you are the root of organized crime and you're racist as shit.) it's also possible to become addicted to *anything*. and i mean *anything*.

if you can repeat a behavior and your brain no longer cares whether or not that behavior is causing you harm because there is a *compulsive* urge for that *repetition* or a specific result from it? that is addiction. money, anger, pain, violence, self harm, attention, love...

you'd think the last one might be okay, but it's not. it's an easy way to get caught in the infinite loop of an abusive relationship, just with promise of it. no delivery necessary.

but it doesn't have to be drugs that cause addiction. hell, gambling addiction is a thing all it's own that can get *incredibly* severe.

and listen, too much of *anything* can be horrible for you. fucking coconut will give you the runs if you eat too much that shit is *not* fun pun intended--

i digress.

in billy's case? he's actually addicted to two i just listed.

violence. and self harm.

i mentioned before that what drives billy has next to nothing to do with what happened to becky or becca.

there's a common misconception that, at the end of the day, billy does have some level of good intent behind his actions, and to a degree this is true in the *complete reverse* of what people often assume, and this is proven repeatedly in both the show (with just what we have seen) and comic (where its laid out too heavily to ignore).

setting aside the fact that there's *never* a good 'rEaSoN' to commit or even attempt *genocide* (EVER. i have ZERO patience for the constant apologism of this bullshit, SWEAR TO GAWD FANDUMB--) and billy's genocidal tendencies on their own, the idea that 'he goes after homelander for becca' or 'justice' has been completely debunked.

'justice is not vengeance'

something to always keep in mind.

but... in the first season? hughie called him out on this.

butcher calls him a 'disgrace to robin's memory', and hughie--bless his little heart, responds with 'i think i'm doing this *for* her.'

it's an interesting response, because hughie is essentially saying--

'you'll *die* for this woman, but that's not what she would have wanted. i'm going to *live* for robin, and for *annie*, because *that's* what she would have wanted.'

and he's absolutely right. billy loved becca, would have died for her. but he refuses to listen and *live* for her.

the group therapist too even before hughie. she literally laid it all out, front and center in the clearest way possible, 'it's a defense mechanism', and then butcher had his little meltdown just before telling hughie about becca, everything he can, including *using* other peoples tragedies and his own *specifically* to manipulate hughie and try and make sure *starlight* can't *save* him from what butcher is trying to turn him into.

*so that hughie stays stuck on his reason to die, instead of finding one to live.*

in the second season, *becca* herself calls him out on this, multiple times.

'you put me on this pedestal but i never knew how to save you'.

'--i didn't come to you, i went to vought--.'

and that's just it, becca (and becky in the comic) is *intimately* familiar with billy's *addiction* and the underlying mental health issues he *wouldn't address*. she didn't tell him what happened even after the shock of it because she *knew* that it would just become a reason for billy to *give in* and be his worst self to a degree where she would *lose him* regardless of what she felt or asked for from him.

she felt she had to *suffer in silence* to *protect him* from *himself*, something that ends up *destroying* her.

becca wanted to *save* billy, but more importantly, she wanted *him* to *save himself* because she *believed in him*, *so much*.

'i never wanted that for you.'

she doesn't want billy to drown and suffer or cause harm in his own hatred and addictions. she *loved* him so much so, that she was willing to *drown herself* if it meant she could save *him*. she loved him *too much*.

billy's mum too, even tries to help in her own way. (she is much less aware of billy's activity in the comic, but we'll come back to her. for the show, this was likely in response to seeing the news about *stillwell*, something his dad fucking *praised* him for)

'--that he wouldn't have this hold on you--'

billy's actions are almost entirely driven by the *addiction* his father forced on him. on doing the things that would make his 'daddy' *proud*. and the thing is, he's *fully aware* of this.

he constantly *says* that *becca* is his 'reason', that she was his *cure*, but she's the *excuse*. his *new addiction* and *self medication* (also billy, you fucking cunt you *know* what you do and have no leg to stand on when it comes to self medicating--)

both in the worst of what he does and his rejection of addressing his own traumas, and she is *unwilling* in this endeavor. she never wanted this hate to consume him, she never wanted all of this death with her name as the signature, *she never wanted billy to be his father*, much less be something much worse.

he even admits as much in the third season when he hallucinates lenny who tells him his actions would 'break becca's heart'

billy responds something along the lines of 'becca's dead, it doesn't matter what she thinks'. (a line presented in the comic even more harshly, but it drives the point home perfectly.)

when he sees lenny again in his nightmare--

'i'm not that bastard--.'

'come off it billy, you always have been. cause anyone who's ever loved you, you end up gettin' 'em killed, don't ya--.'

'--the last person on god's green earth tryin' to stop you from bein' a monster, and what do you do? drag him down to your level... when he dies... and he will... then no can stop you.'

OOF OUCH OWIE--. the lenny stuff hits so damn hard but it represents *perfectly* what butcher's own *internalized beliefs* are.

mallory calls him out on it literally every season.

'--but billy! not the others!'

'it's like asking a cockroach to not be a cockroach--'

'--because it wouldn't stop with just homelander--'

'this was never about ryan or becca, it was always selfish. the hate inside that you want to let loose on the world.'

'--i was wrong... you are your father, always have been...'

and then there's billy's subsequent impulsive reaction to push ryan away, and *be his father*.

but hell, even in gen v when mallory is speaking to shetty.

and truthfully, billy was even showing *withdrawal* symptoms at the beginning of the third season.

billy himself, even *self punishes*, picking fights he knows he *won't* win as a way to counterbalance *and* satisfy his own addiction, infinite loop. vicious cycle.. (ooh i will def be coming back to the big one here--), and we see this in one *HUGE* way, and in many many smaller ways, but even in the more literal sense of going to bars, starting trouble, and laughing or smiling when he's getting beat the fuck up or *losing*.

it's even highlighted in the show, billy *seeking out violence* and conflict whether he should or not, *especially* when unnecessary. getting his own face busted up and smiling because of it is something that happens multiple times in the comic (even on accident in one instance), and is def given a place in the show. it's easy to pass off as billy simply being a masochist (which is def true lmao he does admit as much), but there's also more to it than that and it goes hand in hand with his *addiction* and--

what he thinks he deserves.

billy *hates himself* so *severely* that he actually *does not believe* that he is capable of the *good* that others, such as lenny, becca, his mum, and hughie are willing to *see* in him. he *completely* believes it when others say that 'he is his father' (internalizes it, struggles with it, and frequently acts on it).

he puts on a show. bravado, posture, and 'confidence'. and he's so good at putting on that front, that he can fool himself, even for a moment. and those that believe it will even *enable* him. and the people he feels *nothing* for? again, he maintains the front. he lives his life *masking*, *faking it*--so fucking hard. homelander could never--

and it's not even necessarily the result of toxic masculinity. don't get me wrong, he def has some issues with that lingering (y'all, if you have *say* you're an 'alpha' and posture out your sweet little ass off 24/7, you're def *not* an 'alpha' lmfao), but it's more so his own *trauma* that forces him to *cling* to that.

but when he *loves*, and he loves *deeply*, he completely rolls over and shows his belly like a kitten<3... when he was with becky, he was happy and comfortable, and all of that *ridiculousness* just melted away completely... he didn't feel any need for it because he felt *safe*, because this constant *insecurity* and feeling of being *threatened* all the damn time looming overhead had suddenly cleared up with becky there.

it's not even so much that billy doesn't feel fear. he might not traditionally (at all if his amygdala is damaged), but considering the fight or flight response, billy's *default* setting literally *is* that *fight* response. he's the way he is because he is *always* afraid and he's been conditioned for it to manifest itself as *rage*.

we see bits of his love come through in a few moments he has with people he has genuine care for. (the way he loves his mum and she instantly calms him down is genuinely so sweet.)

but it's always gonna come back down to 'daddy dearest'.

because of him, *billy is afraid of living*.

and--

his father. *is proud of him*.

billy is *just like him* or *everything he wanted to be* as a *man*, or at least is compelled to *project* this on the surface. and everything in *billy* that *is* his father, *just like him*, is *everything* that billy *hates*. so it manifests into an *intense* self loathing and spiraled addiction that magnifies the worst of what his father *forced* on him.

he *doesn't want* to be *his father*, but he feels, and fully believes that *he already is*. his self hatred is another form of *hating his father*, because *he is that man's legacy*.

so *billy* doesn't *believe* that he deserves love or goodness or care from other people (a parallel we see in homelander, presented a bit differently.) so he 'doesn't care'. makes excuses to not care (about people in general, if not just the very *prominent* antisocial tendencies), or leave, or push them away, lashing out to give *them* the excuse to leave him, because he is *afraid* and in his own mind, *unworthy*.

he's *afraid* of being loved, of *losing* that love, of *hurting* those he loves. he is *afraid* of being his own father.

but it's all he's ever known, all he's ever been *conditioned* to be. intoxicated, ever present, it's this terrible thing that destroys him but he *can't* stop. *addiction*.

and what better way to protect those he loves than to keep himself as *far* away from them as possible? than to *make* them hate him. than to do the *wrong* thing, to *disappoint* them. self sabotage. self punishment.

he can't stop himself. he deserves it.

lather, rinse, repeat.

so what does that mean for homelander, or even the reason he goes after homelander? the *real* reason.

'there must be *some* good in him because homelander 'must be' this 'ultimate evil that *must* be stopped', right?

not really. he's a symptom of a much greater evil, but he was never the root of it. if billy really wanted to solve the problems at hand and get *justice*, he'd go after *vought*, NOT homelander.

homelander is not even the real villain in *billy's* mind, in all actuality.

what homelander *is*?

temptation.

he is... the *ultimate* final high for billy. in terms of addiction to both *violence* and *self punishment*.

he doesn't actually go after homelander because he wants to 'stop him' or even kill him. not really. there are times billy starts a fight *expecting* to *lose*, *wanting* it. homelander *is* one of those times to the most intense degree that billy could find. and he even senses this when they first meet--unnecessarily, privately insulting the man because why?

because he feels *threatened*. because he feels *insecure*. because if homelander is *truly good*, even with *all that power*--

then billy has no fucking excuse--

it is, in essence, the same exact reaction that lex luthor has to superman. forcing himself to *challenge* him because of a *constant* sense of *fear*. (except lex *is* afraid of dying, so 1000% a huge coward lmao--)

but~, when he finds out homelander is *bad*?

homelander is billy's *failsafe*

to stop the person he feels is the most terrible evil of all *and* to set the world on fire in the process. a way for billy to kill two birds with one stone. compelled by his addiction to *chase* this ideation relentlessly.

homelander is to billy--his ultimate end, self punishment, a death wish, a *suicide attempt*.

and a way to *unleash his hatred onto the rest of the world*, *to make it burn*, even after his death. (this would be why despite many many MANY warnings to *not* push homelander *because of the catastrophe this will ultimately instigate and the loss of life this is bound to result in*--billy does not give a shit about the potential consequences. he welcomes them--)

if homelander were a *nuke*, billy would want to *launch* him. right now, homie is more like the *demon core*, incredibly dangerous and in some instances lethal, but not *yet* explosive.

billy *wants* the *warhead*.

it was why he got *so excited* at the *chance* of homelander offering him 'scorched earth'.

the man read billy like an open fucking book, and set the bait--

y'all, in other words, homie straight up went to billy's house and offered *crack* to the *crack addict*--fuck yeah he's gonna take that offer!

homelander never actually perceives billy as a real threat *at all* (safe to say, this is the main reason he doesn't kill him. there's a bit of personal complex combined with the deals/blackmail/request involved, but this would also be why he doesn't *hesitate* to 'kill' billy at herogasm. he genuinely gives no fucks about this poor man or his many anal complexes and daddy issues beyond the mild entertainment he gets from him and just how *easy* it is to read billy or rile him up. maybe a *dash* of novelty being found in billy's obsession with him. i'll go into the homie side of things in depth maybe someday soon lol but for now--)

and here's the thing, homelander isn't the *only* failsafe. he is simply the *ultimate failsafe*

included in all the possible bad habits billy has is pawning off his *responsibility* and personal accountability, even his *will to do good* onto others.

i mentioned before that becca (becky) was like a new addiction for him. and she was. in a sense, billy was using her to self medicate. she loved him, gave him love and made him feel good, no pain, no shame--but also no pause to think about that pain, self hatred and self doubt and actively address it. she was a way to not worry about his own *goodness* because she was an *easy* reason for him to *want* to be good.

and something important to note?

billy feels that he has *cheated* on becca/becky *since* the day she left/died. (there's a whole ass deliciously intricate story there but i'm trying to avoid the spoilers lmao. kind of a freebie hint i guess.)

lenny and hughie similarly make an effort to *hold butcher back* and reach out to him. (everyone does honestly, but not everyone is so successful with it). and butcher lets them, but *also* removes the agency of his own choice in the matter.

he doesn't just *let them* make him *good*, he doesn't believe he's capable of stopping himself on his own--but he believes in *them* because they *are* good, *truly good*.

hughie all on his own is *another kind of failsafe* and lo and behold, even calls butcher out on this by the end of the third season (theme is prevalent in the comic a lil different but again spoilers lol):

'i don't think you want to do this. i think you want me to stop you.'

*ding*ding*ding*!

nail on the head, hughie... butcher does not believe he can stop himself. so he sets up *failsafes* to do as much.

and let me just say, it is *unbelievably* shitty of him to do that, to pawn off the responsibility of his own behavior, whether good or pure evil onto other people. but i get it. and it fucking breaks my heart for him.

because *that* is addiction. it feels like mind control. aggressive compulsion. you feel ashamed, and hate yourself, and don't care if you hurt yourself or even others. but you keep *hoping*, *wishing*, *leaving a breadcrumb trail* so that *someone*, *anyone*, will come along and--

*save you. from you.*

and when you stop believing in yourself, in your own willpower to fight against this *thing* that just completely *destroys* you from the inside out... without *anyone* on your side, what else is left to do but to numb the pain?

i was able to recognize billy's addiction right off the bat because i've *been* to a lot of the places he has been. including the addiction. and he makes me so *fucking* mad because it's like seeing a version of myself *still stuck*, *still lost*, *still trapped* by my own issues and self loathing, and all of the abuse i've gone through--

and the biggest fuck up, the biggest *abuser* is me.

i can't *escape* me. *no one* can escape *themself*.

that fucker breaks my heart to pieces because *i have been there*, and i know just how fucking hard it is to *be* there, just how much harder it is to *get out* and start to *learn*--*who is it you really wanna be? who are you without this drug?*

and something he even says in the comics on a few occasions is--

'i'm not really here, i'm somewhere else watching this happen'

asserting that he *truly* believes that he has *no control* over *what* he is. (in contrast with homelander, who feels the weight of something similar but more literally in some regard, and in relation to so many other aspects in his life with the world around him.)

billy butcher *is* the *true villain* of *his own story*

of his own making.

he's not after homelander or even vought. he doesn't blame society or even his father at this point. he blames himself. and he's *given up* entirely on fighting himself. he's looking for his *overdose*.

*that's homelander*

ain't that a kick in the head...

it's part of what makes their relationship and dynamic so incredibly electric and titillating. it's got nothing to do with becca or becky.

butcher sees homelander as an easy way out. as a way to control the narrative, *maintain his own*, and *stop the bad guy* without bringing someone *good*, like *hughie*, down to his level.

he *sees* the parallels, a kindred spirit. he *knows* the potential. and he wants to be the *spark* to light all that *gasoline*.

because then it won't be his fault anymore. his *guilt*. he'll have passed on his *curse*.

likewise, he actually goes after supes in general for a similar enough reason, and it ties in with why he *doesn't* go after vought directly.

billy actually *likes* the status quo. to a degree, *needs* it, *needs vought*

because *vought* is the *creator* of his *supply*, feeding this addiction. and we hear billy say this in both the comic and show--

'with great power comes the absolute certainty that you'll turn into a right cunt.'

and billy actually believes this--about himself.

when he says it about other supes and even his intense hatred of them, it is a *projection* of his own issues and what he believes to be true for himself (that he would do the absolute worst thing imaginable given the opportunity). and in a way, going after them is in some ways a metaphor for stopping and destroying himself, hating himself, as much as it is a way to maintain his addiction.

and--

maintain the narrative he has built--that he is the true villain.

and if that's the case, well... it takes a *hero* to stop a *villain*, right?

but also--y'all remember that scene in the suicide squad where polkadot man imagines everyone as his mum? how he imagines starro as his mum?

yeah, that.

that's basically billy. every fucking supe, including starlight, and kimiko, and let's *really* not talk about what this means about him sleeping with maeve in context with his 'supe=daddy' issues, but even the person he sees in the mirror. *all of them* are *his father*.

listen, i'm not kidding. billy's daddy issues are seriously severe, so fucking bad, i--

his actions aren't for becca or becky or ryan or justice. even he *knows* that's bullshit and admits as much (which just makes fandom denying it that much more fucked). but they're not even *just because* or because he's genocidal, antisocial, or anything else. he *does* want someone to stop him. he's sane enough to recognize his actions for what they truly are *behind* the mask.

billy's actions are a volatile and violent *cry for help*, because he never learned how to *ask*, or even how to *believe in himself*.

he never truly learned that *he never had to be his father*, and he didn't *need* becky or becca, lenny or hughie to *be good*.

i actually think billy's greatest magic trick is convincing even the audience and readers that he is a *total*, complete piece of shit. and don't get me wrong, he is *def* a huge, massive, incredibly rank and ripe piece of shit--.

and y'all, i'm sorry if you believed him and got played like a damn fiddle, him and homie def throwin' in some hard balls--

but he's also still human. he also still needs just as much if, honestly? maybe even more, fucking *help* than homelander. which kind of draws back into their parallels. the tomfoolery of fandom might have you believe that billy is less complex or more put together than homelander, but their situations go hand in hand and the evidence suggests (if not confirms) something quite different.

billy's plight and even goal in some sense is *convincing the rest of his world that he is a monster*. driven by the addiction his father gave him. enabled by the world around him.

homelander's? it's actually the complete opposite. his struggle is with *his world convincing him that he is a monster*, and in turn, against his own instincts, *growing* into that role. when in reality, he never got the chance to decide for himself, it was decided *for* him a long long time ago.

'i think, therefore i am.'

'i can, therefore i must.'

however, *our actions cannot define who we are, because we can choose our actions*. good or bad are not something you inherently *are*, they are something you *choose to do*.

it paints what in turn becomes quite the brutal and tragic picture when these two forces meet. homelander and billy are both of the mindset that they *don't have a choice*.

and this bit is a bit more of a personal thought, but regarding billy's mum, she was *becky*. she was sweet, and kind, and cared for her family more than anything. *it didn't matter what she suffered, she was willing to drown if it meant saving the people she loved*.

as much as i adore how cute becca and billy were, i don't think she would have saved him.

i think the implication is that she would have either 'drowned' trying and become his mum, history repeating itself in a vicious cycle as billy spread his disease to any child they could have.

or that she would have lost her mind. and in turn *become* the person billy spread his disease to, if not another enabler for him. if not billy's choice of drug, maybe she would have taken up something else and eventually overdosed. i would even say the show implies this outcome with both becca and hughie, as the more butcher pushes--the more worn down they get.

if you put enough pressure on someone--they break.

becca was *good* for him. but billy was so, so fucking *bad* for her.

it begs the question of whether or not billy *is* right, if he really is this monster, *fated* to become his father in the worse of ways. of whether or not it's too late for him.

he's certainly not 'normal' or 'right' or 'good' or even an 'anti-hero'. at best, you could maybe call him an 'anti-villain', he is meant to be the deuterantagonist.

it def doesn't help that every time he has the *chance* to do the right thing, *someone* goes and enables him, gives him a reason to do the *wrong* thing.

fucking maeve in that last episode of the third season. but she's def not the only one, and def not the only time. (and yes, if it wasn't clear enough, being completely fucking indifferent to killing *thousands* of people to go after *one* fucking guy is in fact, the *wrong* thing to do.)

butt.

rewatching the scenes with lenny and billy's reaction, and even the final fight, showed something of a *possible* silver lining.

billy *enjoys* rejecting his father. actually pretty fucking greatly if we're being honest. generally speaking, it's when he *rejects* his father and everything that man represents that billy is at his *happiest* (lmao the epitome of an unfulfilled submissive sweetheart and bratty bossy bottom~<3<3<3)

there's a moment, where soldier boy says something along the lines of--

'--fuck you. you're weaker than he is.'

in regards to homelander. it's sort of glossed over, but this is billy's reaction to essentially being called a 'disgrace' so to speak by a toxic 'alpha male'.

y'all see that? it's a smile. lmao a smirk.

this is a moment where billy is protecting *ryan* and keeping his promise to becca. it's a moment where billy is *doing the right thing*, all on *his own* (mostly lol i'm sure there's a roundabout way to justify it in his head). and i think that's key.

it's not just a moment he's proud of himself and has a legitimate fucking reason to be proud of himself, (oh btw, we shoulda *all* been proud of billy in this moment), it's a moment he's *breaking through what his father made him* and his own *addiction*.

and he's doing it *selflessly* and--*without setting that responsibility on another person*.

so we *know* he has it in him, he always has. even becky *in the comic* kept trying to convince billy that *he is capable of good without her*. and again, we actually saw this in the second season when becca and ryan were reunited and billy *changed* his plans, *for becca*, instead of doing the selfish thing and selling ryan back to vought.

but if billy doesn't believe it himself...

i don't think billy is right about himself. but it is very *very* difficult for someone to *correct course* so to speak, once they have their *core beliefs*, lay out their own destiny and start along a *self fulfilling prophecy*, something him and homelander *both* do.

enter ryan.

and suddenly (lol probably in part due to reading dear becky lol), there was a bit of... not so much new, as *confirmed* perspective in play after that rewatch, something to *look* for and ponder in regards to *why* ryan may have been added for this story, a question in mind--

'would it be wrong of *ryan* to want to save his father?'

was it wrong of becca or becky, hughie or lenny, even his mum, to want to save billy?

how would *billy* even begin to answer such questions?

a different answer for the two would be a clear hypocritical bias (which lol i would not put past billy, but i also wouldn't be surprised if he maintained consistent thinking by answering *yes* to both)

. . .

y'all...

i still can't say i'm particularly optimistic about things turning out alright for either gent or ryan, butt~<3

garth ennis literally made the saddest, most pathetic, deliciously sweet, perfectly precious, extra emo tsun tsun baby boi ever, and put him right under our noses.

some a y'all fucking sneezing all over him, straight up sleepin' on all his *best* bits. how are we not utilizing billy butcher *properly~<3<3<3*????

;)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[blueskittlesart]

hi! im really curious about your thoughts on oot, i'm trying really hard to like it and i wanna see what you enjoy about it

Hi!!! I'm going to do my best to explain exactly why I like oot but there is a TON of ground to cover. i have already written a bit about the story and my thoughts on it in this document, but this is a much more in-depth analysis of the symbolism and implied narrative which i think may be more helpful to you if you're struggling to get into the story and gameplay!

oot is my favorite zelda game of all time and was what made me fall in love with the series, but I will concede that it shows its age, especially with the insane advancements that video games have made over the past 2 decades or so since its release. Try to remember when playing it that it came out in 1998, when a game with any sort of 3d graphics at all was still new and exciting. some of its gameplay is going to be a bit dated, unfortunately, and it's totally reasonable to dislike that aspect of it i think! If you really find yourself struggling with gameplay, i recommend zeldadungeon.net for dungeon walkthroughs. they have very concise and easy-to-follow walkthroughs for the entire game which make the gameplay MUCH smoother for first-time players! there's no shame in needing walkthrough help in these dungeons, ESPECIALLY some of the later ones which get notoriously convoluted and difficult. that being said, even if you use walkthroughs, I'd encourage you to still pay attention to the dungeon's designs and details as a lot of thought was put into these designs and I think they're still some of the strongest in the series! gameplay-wise I'd also say that there are a lot of little collectibles that will seem like they're way more important than they are to new players. you don't need the skulltulas (they get you a bigger wallet), you don't need to complete any trading sequences, you don't even REALLY need to go out of your way to collect any of the extra heart pieces, the game is perfectly beatable with just the hearts you'll get from dungeons. Knowing all these things going in will really streamline your gaming experience and make things easier for you if you're getting put off by the 90s-style game design.

As for what i really love about the series, it's the story. And i understand that if you're not someone who makes a habit of analyzing media to an obsessive degree, at first glance oot doesn't seem to have a lot of story. A simple fact of old game design is that more dialog and cutscenes meant more storage space was needed, and the biggest constraint in game design at the time was the limited amount of storage a disc or cartridge could hold. What this means is that storytelling in older games like oot takes a very different form than the cutscene and dialog-heavy storytelling that games tend to use nowadays. the storage restrictions on the game meant that a lot of oot's story had to be told implicitly, via details and worldbuilding and actions carried out by the player. I know this can make it difficult to grasp at first glance! that's why i love to analyze it and talk about it, because I want people to understand how rich and well-told oot's narrative actually is and i know that most people aren't as willing to put in the work as i am, lol. with that being said, this is where the spoilers are gonna start! i'm gonna recap and analyze most of oot's story here, so if you're not looking for spoilers scroll away now and experience the game for yourself!!

oot is at its roots a story about adults failing children. i will elaborate on this point a bit more later, but for now let's look at our opening segment. We are introduced to our link, the youngest link in the franchise, at nine years old. From the get-go, we as the player are told that link's hylian parents died in a conflict very shortly after he was born, leaving him in kokiri forest to be raised by the deku tree, among the kokiri.

The kokiri are a race of eternal children. what this means, essentially, is that we begin the story with a link wearing rose-tinted glasses. the kokiri live forever without aging or dying, and they never leave the forest. Link has grown up isolated and without any concept of aging or death. he has been told by the deku tree, his father-figure, that he IS a kokiri and therefore will never age or die. Despite this, link does have a crucial difference from the rest of the kokiri that even he is aware of--he has no fairy. If you talk to the kokiri in the initial kokiri forest segment of the game, many of them will talk down to you or make remarks about you finally getting a fairy, reminding the player that link knows SOMETHING is wrong with him, that he's different from the other kids somehow, but he's not yet been able to pinpoint what.

we come to our first dungeon segment, where the deku tree summons link and tells him that he's dying and that link must defeat a monster to save him. when the player completes this objective, the deku tree dies anyway, revealing that he knew all along he couldn't be saved and lied to link about it in order to get him to do the dungeon. with his dying breath, he tells link to leave the forest and find princess zelda. (worth noting that up until this point, link has been told that leaving the forest will KILL HIM.) this is the first major failure of an adult we see, and as the inciting incident of the game it sets the tone very nicely for the rest of the shitshow. The deku tree lies to link his entire life about who he is, and then spends his dying moments lying to link AGAIN, specifically in service of a greater plan to turn link into the savior of hyrule by sending him to help princess zelda. this point is crucial--the deku tree has clear-cut, understandable reasons behind acting the way he does. It would have been much easier on link to allow him to grow up isolated among the kokiri, and it removes a lot of the potential danger he would have faced as an orphan in hyrule in the aftermath of the war which killed his parents. (we will later see that hyrule is in no way a safe place for a child on their own.) Explaining all the magical-destiny lore to a nine year old had the potential to scare him away from the task ahead, as did admitting to him that there was no way to save the deku tree. But lying to him about it all still ultimately deeply hurt him. this is the stage upon which the rest of the game will build.

Link, freshly traumatized by the death of his tree dad, leaves kokiri forest. he goes to castle town and meets princess zelda, a girl no older than him. Princess zelda tells him that she fears for the safety of her kingdom, but that no one will listen to her when she tries to warn them of the danger. this is our second adult failing--the entire conflict around which this game centers could have been prevented if only any adult was willing to listen to zelda's concerns about ganondorf. But because she is a child she is dismissed over and over again until she finally turns to ANOTHER child for help. her plan for link involves him retrieving objects needed to open the gateway to the sacred realm within the temple of time, which i know sounds like a bunch of confusing lore shit but all you really need to understand is that there's a gateway to what is essentially godlike power inside this temple, and zelda wants link to open the gateway and claim the power before ganondorf can. link already has one of the 3 keys he needs--it was the reward for killing the deku tree beating the first dungeon in kokiri forest, and zelda takes this as proof enough that he will be able to find the other two.

in these first three dungeon segments, link is confined to his nine-year-old form. His sword is wooden and deals considerably less damage than it will later in the game, and in each of the dungeon segments there are reminders of the way being a child affects his autonomy in hyrule--the guard at the gates of death mountain won't let him pass, the zora princess berates him for not being enough of a man, several collectibles are clearly visible but impossible to reach with his current size & ability, etc etc. this section of the game is deliberately juxtaposed against the initial segment in kokiri forest, in which everything was built for someone of link's size and strength and no part of the map was unexplorable or all that challenging. What you're supposed to realize here is that being a kid in hyrule is HARD. you have very little autonomy and are constantly condescended to. One of the few hylian npcs your age, Malon, is a good example of this--in her mini-quest she vents to link about how her father can't see that his stablehand resents him and she's constantly having to look after him without being listened to. She is being given adult responsibilities (looking after her father & the animals on their farm) without adult social status. Her situation is a deliberate parallel to both link and zelda's, though during this 3-dungeon segment of the game it's not immediately clear yet just how much adult responsibility link is actually shouldering. in any case, this is our third example of adults failing children, and the theme begins to be echoed in the worldbuilding of hyrule during this stage as well.

now we come to the initial confrontation, the scene which alters the trajectory of the game and divides what i consider the first and second halves of the gameplay (although the second half is probably much longer lol). Link, having found all 3 keys to the sacred realm, returns to hyrule castle, only to find that ganondorf has attacked, forcing princess zelda to flee with her attendant. He catches one final glimpse of her where she throws him the final key needed to unlock the temple of time: the ocarina. although no words are exchanged between them, it's clear that she's asking link to carry out the rest of her plan on his own and claim the power sealed in the temple before ganondorf can. and so link goes to the temple of time and opens the gateway, but link is nine years old and so link doesn't notice that ganondorf, a trained thief, is following him. When he opens the temple, ganon siezes the power zelda was trying so hard to keep him from finding.

we then pan down to link again, but different. he's changed, he's older. notably, he isn't an adult. he is sixteen years old, physically, but mentally, for both link and the player, no time has passed at all. this is important to keep in mind for the rest of the game--no matter how link may look, he is mentally still nine years old. he wakes up to essentially a lecture from the world's biggest dickhead, the sage rauru. Rauru places the blame for ganondorf's rise to power squarely on link and zelda's shoulders, noting that if link hadn't opened the temple of time in the first place, ganondorf would have never been able to sieze power. he tells link that he placed him into a deep sleep for the past seven years because, at nine years old, he wasn't strong enough physically to take on ganondorf and win. But now, he says, link is old enough to be a real asset. it's time for link to defeat ganondorf.

Once again, we have a clear-cut case of adults failing children. Link and zelda took matters into their own hands BECAUSE of the adults in their lives. for link, it was the deku tree (HIS FATHER)'s dying wish that he help zelda. for zelda, her plan was a last resort after begging every adult in her life to see what was coming and being constantly ignored. now that what she predicted has come to pass, she and link take all the blame for it, for being kids in a difficult position doing the best they could with NO ADULT HELP WHATSOEVER. you can't place the fate of an entire kingdom on the shoulders of two nine year olds and expect it not to fall. but that's what hyrule's adult leaders did, and when the kingdom fell they let the nine-year olds take the blame for it. zelda hasn't been seen for years. she's either dead or in hiding out of shame for her mistake. meanwhile, Link has once again become a pawn in someone else's game. The sage rauru decides for him, without ever consulting him, that he can't be trusted to remain conscious for the seven years between gameplay segments. that he will be safer and happier to remain asleep. anyone who stops for a moment to consider what this might do to link's mental state would have not done this, but rauru sees link as a child, which in hyrule is synonymous with an object to be controlled, with no feelings of his own. he needs to be protected and hidden, regardless of what effect it has on him when he wakes up. nothing else matters as long as he can be kept alive and unharmed. this is a deliberate parallel to the way the deku tree treated link while under his care in kokiri forest--he doesn't need to know the truth, because it's easier and more convenient for everyone else if he doesn't. its effect on his mental state doesn't matter. what matters is that he is kept in a position which is convenient for the adults in his life. this is another reminder of the way in which being so young hurts link, and if I can diverge into real-world relevance for a second, it's an obvious metaphor for the way trauma steals one's childhood. Link was never allowed to grow up normally. he went from being a kid one day to an adult the next, with no time in between to figure anything out. his childhood, his coming-of-age, was stolen from him by greedy adults who needed him to be a pawn in their war.

the dungeons in the adult segment of the game can technically be completed in multiple different orders, but the usual order (and what i think is probably the way the narrative is intended to progress) is to get to the forest temple first, which requires you to reenter kokiri forest, all grown up. it's important to note that up until this point in your gameplay, link still has plausible deniability about his race. sure, he didn't die when he left the forest, but maybe that was a lie told to ALL kokiri. maybe he's still a kokiri and he won't grow up. but now he's got solid proof that he was lied to, and that the safe, beautiful sanctuary he's spent the majority of his life in was never actually meant to be his home. When you return to kokiri forest as an adult, you find that it's nothing like the safe-haven you remember. it's been overrun with monsters that are taller than you now, as an adult. This is a metaphor, obviously, for returning to someplace changed. link goes back to his home and it doesn't feel like his home anymore with all that he knows now. And if the monsters weren't enough, if link talks to the kokiri, cowering in their little kid-sized houses, not a single one of them recognizes him. they address him as an adult they've never met before. to them, it's been seven years, and they've never known a kid to grow into an adult before. but to link, it's been a few days at most, and inside he's still the little boy they knew.

the dungeons in this segment of the game are mostly straightforward training exercises to give link the necessary skills and assets he needs to fight ganondorf. I'll skip over most of them, but there are three things i DO want to highlight about this section of the game: malon, sheik, and the water temple.

Malon is introduced in the first half of the game as an example of another child with very little agency and power. Seven years later, if link visits her again, he will find the ranch in an even worse state, with the stablehand having taken over and kicked out malon's father. Malon stays purely out of fear of what will happen to her horses if she leaves them in his hands. She is an adult now, as you are, and yet she has even less power than before. So much of the first half of oot is framed in such a way that the player wishes link was older. It wants you to think, wouldn't this whole thing be easier if I was an adult? Wouldn't I have more power, more agency? but now that you ARE an adult, you're confronted with the fact that nothing has changed. you are still a pawn in a war against ganondorf. Malon is still trapped at the ranch, forced to endure daily abuse or leave her animal friends to die. however, this segment is also the first time you as the player are given the option to fight back. If you, as a child, have taken the necessary steps to befriend malon and epona, one of her horses, you are able to use the bonds you forged in childhood to run the stablehand off the ranch and return power to malon. this mini-arc with malon is a teaser for the overarching arc of the game--having no power in childhood, believing that adulthood will be your savior, but finding the same powerlessness in adulthood, and ultimately returning to pieces of your childhood in order to finally reclaim your power.

next up is sheik, who is deliberately a mystery for the majority of this segment, but. well. we all know he's zelda, so i'm not going to beat around the bush. Sheik is what has become of zelda in the years since ganondorf took power--where zelda was once strong-willed and refused to stand down in the face of danger, sheik now moves among the shadows, darting in to offer link a bit of help or advice but never getting too close. My reading of this is that zelda, after growing up in the aftermath of her failed plan, was afraid of what she'd done to link. She saw her influence as the thing that brought hyrule to ruin--after all, link never would have opened the door in the temple of time if not for her. The way she sees it, her choice to use him back when they were nine destroyed his life and her kingdom. This is why she's largely absent in this segment of the game, only stepping in for brief moments and disappearing the second link tries to reach out for her. Her character at this point is essentially representative of self-isolation as a coping mechanism.

finally the water temple, which I promise i didn't single out just because it sucks, but i will warn any potential players that it sucks. it's the most convoluted ass design in the world and even with a walkthrough it gets confusing and hard to navigate at times. this is not the point of this paragraph, though. the point of this paragraph is that there is a miniboss in this dungeon that is INCREDIBLY important to link's character and to this day is one of the most well-done and impactful battles i've ever had the pleasure of playing. (side note, why the hell did the himekawa manga make this battle happen at the bottom of the fucking well?? ive believed for years that he was a shadow temple boss because of that. whatever. anyways)

about halfway through this dungeon, you come upon a room that looks like an endless sea of water, with bits of ruins and a single rotting tree in the middle. when you walk into the room, you'll be attacked by a mini-boss that takes the form of link's reflection, black and translucent with glowing red eyes. the miniboss dark link will mimic your attacks and block when you swing, requiring players to be crafty and strategic in order to beat him instead of just swinging with the right weapon at the right time. from a purely gameplay-based standpoint, this fight is sick as hell. it rewards you for thinking on your feet and forces you to come up with real time strategy to beat a foe who genuinely seems to think the same way you do, which is REALLY cool, especially for a game released in nineteen fucking ninety eight. narratively, though, there are symbols upon symbols upon symbols to be picked apart in this fight alone. there's the obvious metaphor of fighting onesself--representative of an internal struggle of some kind. pair that with the set dressing for this arena and the information we already know about link, and things start to fall into place. Link was raised in a lush forest, surrounded on all sides by walls of trees that kept him safe and isolated from the world at large. the minute he left that forest, bits and pieces of his worldview started to fall apart--he learned his identity as a kokiri was a lie, experienced the hardships of being a child in hyrule, and now he's grown up and become a pawn in the fight against ganondorf, losing what little agency he had along with the ability to return to his home in kokiri forest. He finds himself in this illusion room, with a shadow version of himself waiting to attack him, clearly indicating that this room is representative of his state of mind. an endless, desolate landscape stretching out into infinity. no walls to keep him safe, no cover at all save for that one single, ROTTING TREE in the middle. This tree is a symbol of link's mental state. (my evidence for this one spans across a couple games but just trust me when i say this interpretation is grounded in reality it would just take too long to explain) and the tree is not looking good. it is dying. and from this dying tree springs a reflection of himself that link must fight to progress. I think there's an obvious message that's being conveyed here: link regrets leaving kokiri forest. he regrets the way he's been used, the hard truths he has had to learn about the world since he left. He is still mentally nine years old, and as a child he still yearns to return to that safety he was promised in kokiri forest despite knowing that it's no longer there for him to return to. Dark link is representative of all link's fear and regret and turmoil surrounding his destiny and what has been done to him over the last seven years. Because this is a video game, he is able to physically fight those feelings, to defeat the reflection of himself that torments him and walk out of that room at peace, having faced his fears and confronted his true feelings. Narratively, this battle is representative of the ongoing internal struggle link is grappling with over the course of this segment of gameplay, and shows the player how link must overcome those feelings of fear and inadequacy in order to gain the power to defeat ganon.

now we finally come to the ending segment of the game. this is where the lore gets a little bit convoluted and trips some people up. if you're not a lore slave you can basically ignore the triforce thing. the only affect it has on the narrative is that it gives ganondorf a reason to need both link and zelda, since they have the other two pieces of the powerful relic he's after. this is why he kidnaps zelda and taunts link to come rescue her instead of just like. hunting them both for sport in the wilds of hyrule.

the final battle with ganon is the culmination of all your efforts throughout the game. in the leadup to it, the final dungeon reminds you of this by having each of its rooms be a mini-version of one of the previous six temples you completed in the second half of the game. once you finish this final dungeon, you're able to get into the castle. I have to mention one of my favorite design choices in this whole game here, which is the fact that the background music in the castle gets louder the closer you get to the final room, and when you finally get there it's revealed that ganondorf was playing it the whole time. the details in this game make me crazy they're all so well-done. anyways. to discuss this battle we first need to discuss a crucial character who i realize i've forgotten to mention this ENTIRE time somehow: navi.

I love navi. i hate the way she became a joke among fans. this is not the point of this post. the point is that narratively, navi is one of the only GOOD adult figures we see in the entire game. (one could argue that she isn't an adult, but she takes on a guiding and mentor-like role for link so i consider her one despite some of her more childish mannerisms.) Navi is the one character who has been at link's side since the very beginning, the only consistent good influence on his life. the only adult mentor who hasn't somehow tried to fuck him over or manipulate him somehow. She is INTEGRAL to his survival through all the crazy bullshit he gets caught up in. the game makes her importance clear to the player in two ways: the first, obviously, is that she's the tutorial character--she tells you where to go, what to do, explains mechanics and puzzles, etc. The second, and the detail that's gonna be super important in our discussion of the final battle, is that she's tied to the game's targeting mechanic. It's subtle enough that I actually didn't notice it my first time around UNTIL this final battle, but every time you target an enemy to attack them (which with the way the camera movement is designed in this game is basically a required element of combat) navi flies to their weak spot and hovers there, which is the in-game explanation for what targeting is--navi is showing link the monsters' weak spots. in the first phase of the final battle with ganondorf, he erects a forcefield which prevents navi from entering the battlefield, removing the player's ability to target completely.

i absolutely LOVE this battle in terms of both gameplay and narrative. removing the targeting mechanic is a genuine handicap that makes the battle genuinely difficult for the player, and narratively it serves to remind you of the importance of navi, a positive adult influence, in link's life. without her, dealing damage is so much more difficult, but as soon as you have her back the battle becomes super intuitive and you're able to strategize much more effectively. Eventually, you deal enough damage to get navi back and flee the castle with the princess, before making one final stand against Ganon, a mutated beast-form of ganondorf. with navi by your side, his massive weakness becomes easily targetable, and you're able to defeat and seal him for good.

the end-credits scene of the game shows link time-traveling back to his nine-year-old self, before any of the events of the game have come to pass, and re-entering hyrule castle to warn nine-year-old zelda about what is to come. this is a time paradox, i know, but i LOVE this ending thematically. As I mentioned extensively earlier, link and zelda's stories are both representative of the way trauma robs you of childhood. they were both stripped of their chance to be children and grow up and come of age due to what happened with ganondorf. Allowing link to go back and prevent those events from ever occurring is a promise of healing. it's a promise that he and zelda will be able to reclaim the childhoods that were stolen from them by war and by adults who wanted to use them as pawns in it. it's a reclamation of the agency that these characters have been consistently denied throughout their stories. it's. a good ending. it's a really good ending. I like it a lot.

So uhhh wow that was a lot! what it comes down to is that i think oot is a story a ton of people can relate to. being a kid with responsibility but no agency and longing to be an adult, but then growing up and wanting nothing more than to return to the childhood you lost... that's something that really resonates with me, at least. and yeah oot has a lot of quirks and convoluted story and stuff but at its core it's a really beautiful coming-of-age that deals REALLY well with trauma and childhood and growing up!! tldr it's just. a genuinely incredible story and it means a LOT to me lol

[highpri3stess]

Hello, I just read Monster, and I have to say. Whilst I don't usually read stuff like this bc I'm not a fan, you genuinely outdone yourself with it. Like I love how you portray the reader, she feels like a fully fleshed out character with depth, and I could fully empathise with her and understand why she did what she did. I also like how you portray abuse as it is. Making it clear that it isn't the victims fault. It NEVER is and just bc they didn't openly resist (due to fear or coercion, which I believe was what happened with the reader). This is just my subjective opinion, so please correct me if I'm wrong. Also I fucking hate mikey and izana. Like YH izana is a pos but MIKEY was the reason why this shit even started bc he and izana decided to slut shame reader and acted suprised when Emma rightfully calls them out. And then they have the audacity to balme the reader and then SA her. (Like sure she irgamsed but that was literally the body's response to stimuli. She did NOT enjoy that at all and then mikey thinking that shopping/food was gonna fix it and is like "why are you crying. You're still a virgin 🤓👆" made me wanna run him over. And then izana just being like "nobody's getting in between me and emma" forgetting that a) hr should have kept his fucking mouth shut. Lil bro beefing with a random girl who did nothing to him (fucking manlet) and b) Emma has her own life to live. Like icl it lowkey feels out of touch (or iazna expecting that she'd stay the same but I could be wrong) and that she's a grown ass adult. Ofc she's gonna get a man (draken) and friends (reader) she isn't gonna stick by his side forever but that doesn't mean she isn't his sister and that she loves him (that's going out the window when she catches both him and mikey in 4K terrorising reader)

Long story short. This is fucking amazing. You're amazing and the anons who are hating on you don't deserve even the scum of your shoe.

Also Praying on the sano's downfall. Want reader to go apeshit, pull a moon dong eun (the glory) and document EVERYTHING. expose them and the university and get that bitch shut down, everyone loses their scholarships (emma does too unfortunately which ends the friendship), sano name descacged to the pont of shinichiro, mokey and izana and she takes everyone down with her. The reason why I'm suggesting this is bc I'm imaging that reader slowly grows resentful of emma bc of the SHEER amount of trauma she experiences (all bc she dared be friends with her and they saw it fit to make her life hell) enough that she doesn't care what happens to her by the time she exposes them (OR alternatively. It can go the op with reader completely omitting emma from her exposes bc she did nothing wrong. She stood up for reader and was there during her lowest times. So why would she wanna ruin that for her. And I can see a moral dilema coming on, expose them and the university and cause a scandal, possibling getting it shut down, ruining Emma's career and future by assosiation. OR does she keep quiet, try to figure another or just take it to not ruin emmas nut she's just suffering).

Soo I hopes you accepted my word vomit. Thank you. Sorry if I was rude or intruding on your story if you already had it planned out. I'm just sharing my theories and what my happen.

As always, if im wrong, please don't hesitate to correct me. Thank you.

Oh thank you so much! And no, you're not intruding at all! Your analysis on the two chapters is very spot on and correct! You really took your time to read it and I'm very grateful for it!

I'm thinking a lot about how emma and y/n's relationship will evolve. I wish I could have expanded more on it but time is not on my side necessarily. I will try to do so if I can.

I wish we could get a satisfactory ending where everyone is exposed and there is a scandal (they aren't on scholarship but the school wouldn't want anyone to taint their image.) Unfortunately, it's never always like that in real life and I'm gunning for a more realistic ending.

(Oh I loved the Glory a lot too! I'm totally going to watch it)

[rainytypology]

ATEEZ Wooyoung Enneagram

- E2, sx/so 2w3, 278 -

An in depth analysis of an idol's enneagram. Based on my opinion and observations. Not an expert. May change later.

Core (main type): 2

Triads: Heart/Image/Shame, Positivity, Compliant, Rejection

Basic motive: To be loved

Basic fear: Being unworthy of love

Wooyoung has always desired love and admiration from others. He has lots of love and care in his heart and not afraid to express his affections for others. 2s want love and want to give love, so many of them are drawn to people.

He highly values relationships, especially since he used to feel lonely when he was younger. Since then, he seems motivated to create connections with others - Wooyoung simply wants love and to give love, just like an ennea 2.

Wooyoung seems especially touched when fans tell him the deep impact his and the group's work have on them - how he and ATEEZ help change a fan's life for the better. A 2 wants to be able to help others, to make a positive impact on people and the world. Wooyoung has made it his goal to be the light in other's life. It is the reason why he chose a candle to represent himself in "Fill in the Blanks" episode. (If you haven't seen it yet, I highly recommend it. It is the best proof of his core 2)

Some things from the ep that stood out to me about his ennea 2 core:

"The very first thing that comes to mind when I think of Wooyoung is 'The heart that thinks of those who are precious to him before himself so I think he suits the forget-me-not flower, which means 'true love'." - Seonghwa

"One time when a fan said they know how to give love but don't know how to receive it, Wooyoung replied and said he would teach them both ways. It felt like being embraced by a warm blanket." - Anonymous ATINY

"You, who shines a light on my dark life. Positive, cheerful Wooyoung has completely changed my life." - Anonymous ATINY

"I want to become someone who is needed by someone." - Wooyoung

Wing: 2w3

Wings act as a complement to the core.

With a 3 wing, it adds a need for achievement and success. Wooyoung is definitely goal oriented, accomplishments make him feel worthy of love and praise. He wants to be the best at what he does, which is why he tries so hard to improve in his passions. It's why he tries so hard to improve in his performance and wanting to be the best at his cooking - he has a whole series dedicated to cooking where he pushes himself to learn different techniques for cooking and cutting. He also expanded his menu to be able to cook more different types of food.

As both 2 and 3 are from the same triad, Wooyoung is very image oriented. The best example is one of his recent lives where he was talking about "needing" to lose weight in order to better conform to the ideal idol image. Having a 3 wing gives him a bit of perfectionism, along with very high expectations. He wants to fulfill these expectations in order to gain the love he wants. Although Wooyoung is already quite amazing as is, being a 2w3 may make him feel he still has to look and be a certain way in order to be loved and successful. One of the major things an image/heart type struggles with is never feeling good enough.

Subtype: sx/so

Subtypes show our drive in life.

Sx (sexual/one-on-one): intensity, deep connection

So (social): Group connections, community

Sx 2: Sx 2s want to get to know a person deeply, to know their life story and their soul. This seems to fit Wooyoung best since he said he wants to know the real version of people. He doesn't judge right away - he wants to genuinely take his time to truly understand someone. He wants to be wanted by others.

So 2: Being his 2nd dominant subtype, Wooyoung still values group connections. He's outgoing and friendly and puts effort into creating a nice environment. He wants to do things for others - has said he enjoys cooking and feeding others. Especially when they react positively, it gives him a sense of accomplishment and motivation to get better in order to keep people happy.

Tritype: 278

Tritype is formed up one's dominant type from each center of intelligence (heart, head, gut)

- Head center type: 7 -

Head center focuses on dealing with fear and anxiety.

I think Wooyoung deals with such issues in a 7 way - he's silly and goofy, obviously a fun and overall positive guy, as most 7s are. Even Hongjoong said Wooyoung is good at creating a comfortable atmosphere - they probably would not be as close if it weren't for Wooyoung's ability to make things fun. Whenever things were tense or awkward, Wooyoung would go out of his way to relieve such tension.

- Gut center type: 8 -

Gut center is about reaction, control, and anger.

8's are the most comfortable and open about their anger - they do not repress and are not ashamed. Wooyoung seems to have no difficulty in expressing his disappointments and anger with people. He's quite straightforward and blunt, a bit unfiltered at times. He's also fiercely protective over those he cares about, e.g saying he would bite whoever hurt Seonghwa when some "fans" were being rude to him. He also did a biting motion with his arms as a way to call out the person who had plagiarized their Say My Name dance move. An 8 would definitely be bold enough to do such a thing.

- Stems -

How types connect

2-7: Positivity, playful, fun, charming

7-8: Assertive, can be impulsive, do what they want

2-8: Rejection, take control, protective

___

Other analysis:

MBTI | Birth chart

___

Side blogs:

Kpop astrology @rainy-astrology

Kpop fanarts @rainy-artworks

[2hoothoots]

I was wondering what if anything you thought of B-mask's P2 analysis on youtube! he brings up points of thematic dissonance about the way the maliks were handed (as well as wishing the interns/the P1 gang were better included which I think we all concur on)

ooh, LOVE a good video essay! i hadn't seen this one before but it was great to have on while i was sculpting this morning. i'm gonna link it here for anyone who hasn't seen it, if you've got the time it's a good watch:

i'd say i broadly agree with it, although i think the analysis loses me at the end. imo he tries to read in much too literally to the parallels between the Maliks and the real-life case of Tsar Nicholas II/the Romanov family. to me that's always been a much more allegorical reference, and i'd actually specifically point to '60s-era Cold War tensions between the USA and the USSR as a much closer thematic parallel to the whole Maligula thing, which is mentioned but not really dug into properly in the video. (in fact, i think that comparison makes the themes of propaganda in the game much clearer, especially given how the Psychonauts are so clearly American in all but name.) it's a shame, because i think everything else is pretty good stuff, but the last 20-or-so minutes feel pretty weak to me.

the video kind of pulls double-duty as an analysis of PN2's themes, and also a comparison and in some ways a critique of it versus the first game. that's something that i've been chewing over since... basically the moment it came out, haha, because i'm in the exact same boat of someone who's absolutely in love with the first game and doesn't quite feel like the sequel was as good (although it's a fantastic game in its own right and i love it a whole lot). so i'm gonna take this as an opportunity to dump my own thoughts on it! this is gonna get long so i'm putting it under a cut: tl;dr, the conclusion that i've basically come to on the game is that while it's not perfect, Psychonauts 2 is, in my opinion, probably the best possible version of what it is, given the circumstances around it and the nature of it as a crowdfunded sequel to a 2000s cult classic and a clear passion project by everyone involved.

the video brings up three main points of comparison/critique: the visuals, the structure/novelty of the gameplay, and the depth of the ensemble cast. i'm gonna borrow that structure, and then go into a little more of why i think certain decisions and compromises were made. overall, i think there were a lot of difficult decisions that had to be made during the development of PN2, and the more i dig into each one the more it seems like a lot of these decisions were made the only way they could be.

in terms of visuals: i can't disagree that the new game looks absolutely great, although i personally wish they'd gone just a little weirder with it. the stylized ugliness of the first game is one of my favourite things about it, and i know that part of that was due to the low poly count... but i dunno, i think there was still the opportunity to make the designs in PN2 a little less cute and a little more grotesque. it feels like the edge has been filed off, pun intended, and a little of the gloomy gothic feel of the first game is gone. i do love the look of the second game, but i can't help but feel that a little something was lost from moving from the deliberate asymmetry and exaggeration of the first game to something a little more... i guess i'd say 'clean' and palatable.

i can't lie, i think that's kind of a shame! but i also definitely get it, especially from a marketing standpoint. the style of PN1 is deeply mid-2000s, calling to mind properties like The Nightmare Before Christmas (which was cited by Tim as a direct inspiration for the game's artstyle) or Invader Zim (iirc, Jhonen Vasquez is a friend of the studio). there's definitely an argument to be made that that kind of angularity would feel dated in a modern game, and certainly similar games that have recently gotten refreshes (take Spyro, or Ratchet and Clank) have also moved towards a cleaner, cuter, more doe-eyed look. maybe that's just the aesthetic upgrade needed to make the game more appealing to a modern audience. (similarly, i think a lot of the tone shift between the games also has to do with being a product of their time. the first game feels a lot meaner, and the second more sincere, in a way that i think is in service to the shifting conversation around mental health. i think it's appropriate, but i do also miss some of the zingers from PN1, hahaha.)

gameplay: yeah, the lack of innovation in the structure of the mental levels is something i absolutely agree with. PN1 did a fantastic job of making every level feel deeply unique, and tying that into the themes of each level as well (ludonarrative!). even when these levels were a little frustrating to actually play, it always felt in service to what the game was trying to do. take how the Milkman Conspiracy is confusing and convoluted and even a little nauseating to navigate, all deliberately designed to create that uneasy atmosphere; or how Black Velvetopia literally traps players in a loop, constantly being forced backwards and only able to make forward progress in little steps before it all comes crashing back down again, as a reflection of Edgar's anger issues. in comparison, other than the noteworthy exception of Compton's Cookoff, most of the PN2 levels are just 'big platforming area that branches off from a hub'.

but i think the video stops short of diving into what i feel is the reason why some of these levels are less innovative. imo it comes down to the shifting market. 3D collect-a-thon platformers aren't really a thing any more, not like they used to be. the genre feels like it's stagnated in a lot of ways; it's not being innovated upon or moved forward, and it's also not something players are really used to any more. again, i think there's an argument to be made that designing a level that's unique but a little obtuse and clunky (take Gloria's Theater - which is great, but by god does it seriously suck to play the first time round) would be a huge turn-off to a lot of players. i sympathise with the devs feeling like they needed to prioritise a smoother platforming gameplay experience, rather than getting a little weirder with it.

story and ensemble cast - yeah, it probably won't surprise anyone to hear that i really wish the interns had gotten more screentime and depth hahaha. i know not everyone loved them, but also, anyone who didn't love them is wrong. they're the best. give me one million new intern voice lines please now

anyway, i think my biggest critique of PN2 (esp. storywise) has always been that it feels like it has one more cast of characters than it knows what to do with. it introduces the interns and the Aquato family and the psychic 6, and between everything it feels like no individual group is given quite enough focus and screentime and room to breathe to really make them shine. so the obvious answer becomes, hey, why not just cut some of the characters?

but on the other hand, like... think about what this game is. this is a sequel from a studio that really doesn't do sequels (and afaik is never planning on doing another one, certainly not a PN3). this is a passion project 16 years in the making. it's a follow-up to a beloved cult classic, and it's something Tim and the others were only going to get the chance to do once, and from that perspective i absolutely can't blame them for wanting to put everything in it. it's clear the team were bursting with ideas and themes they wanted to touch on and plot threads to resolve and cool new characters to introduce, and this was their only opportunity to do so. in their position? i would've done the exact same thing every single time.

a related point that i see brought up a lot, and that i also agree with, is depth - something that's there in spades in PN1, but feels a little lacking in PN2. i think comparing the interns to the campers from PN1 is a pretty obvious way to compare the two games, and yeah, i'll wholly admit that they're one of my favourite things about the first game. they just make the whole summer camp setting feel so alive. there's a huge amount of depth and care given to them; each one has their own little drama that plays out, and while i think there are a few obvious standouts each of them is still interesting and compelling in their own way. that's the kind of depth that has fans coming back a decade after the came first came out. Tim famously got super sidetracked making MySpace pages for all the campers over the space of a few days so that he could really get into their heads and understand their characters. it's great.

most people who play the first game casually will never see any of that. heck, i barely saw anything from the campers on my first playthrough. it was only on subsequent plays, when i went digging and started diving into the fandom and the discussions, that i realised how much there was. i still find new cutscenes and bits of dialogue and interactions every time i play. hell, the fandom is still digging up cutting-room-floor stuff that suggests there was going to be even more interaction with them. i love that depth, i really do. but is it worth putting that much dev time into something that most players will never see? especially in a game when something as fundamental as the boss fights was nearly cut for lack of time and budget?

actually, cut content is something that's pretty interesting to talk about in itself. there's a ton of stuff that's been discovered through datamining: sidequests (like finding Nona in the forest), stuff from early story beats (like the whole Mentathlon - an early version of Hollis' mind?), a whole Gruloky minigame (which presumably would have helped flesh out the Aquato family), and new mechanics (like Otto's bottled emotions - the lines related to which give what is, to me, vitally important insight into some of the characters. i'm not kidding when i say that Norma's bottled sadness line is load-bearing for like 80% of the way i characterise her, it drives me nuts i swear.) in this cutting-room floor content are glimpses of a game that was even more ambitious - dare i say overambitious - than the final product ended up being. we'll never know how much of it actually had a chance of ending up in the game, and how much was cut early due to various reasons, but...

games are made differently now than they were in the 2000s. an AA title like Psychonauts 2 takes more hours, more manpower, and a lot more money than the original. (this isn't adjusted for inflation, but PN1's budget ended up being $11.5mil; in 2012 a projected Psychonauts sequel was ball-parked at $18mil, and i can only imagine that number's gone up.) like i said, i deeply love the depth of interactivity in PN1. but is something like that really feasible, or worthwhile, in the current climate? PN1 was made on some pretty serious crunch. it was a passion project from a small, dedicated team who worked themselves to the bone on it, and due to a number of factors it ended up being a commercial flop that almost ruined them. for PN2, the team were committed to eliminating crunch, which i think is really laudable, especially given the wider state of the industry. in terms of the scope and the cast, PN2 is broader in just about every way than its predecessor. if that was the decision made in favour of added depth to character interactions that only a small number of players would see, was that the right decision to make?

when i look at PN2, what i see, above everything else, is a series of compromises that were made in order to bring a game that a lot of people really cared about to life as best they could. in a lot of ways, it's nothing short of a marvel that the game exists at all. seriously, before the whole campaign dropped if you'd asked me whether i thought Psychonauts could ever get a sequel, i'd have thought you were playing a practical joke. it was a one-in-a-million shot, and they made it, and i kind of think that given everything Psychonauts 2 is actually a hell of a lot better than it has any right to be. there's a lot of factors to the story of its development - it's a sequel, it's a collect-a-thon platformer that released in 2021, it was crowdfunded, it's a passion project through and through, oh yeah and there was a global pandemic midway through development - and i don't think any of those things necessarily hold it back, but they definitely shape it in ways that i don't think can be ignored if you're talking about the game as a whole.

i don't think it's a perfect game. i don't think there is such a thing as a perfect game. but the more time passes and the more i think about it, i think this is... maybe the only version of Psychonauts 2 we could have gotten? i dunno if it's the best game it could have been, but i do think it's the best Psychonauts 2 it could have been, if that makes sense. and the game that it is is, in my opinion, really damn good.

[marjoriestotch]

what is the most underrated aspects about your favs that they have or that other people manage to tackle or portray that give you the brain scramble of feelings? sometimes certain people just get it and I LOSE my MIND, then I think it's a shame that they go under the radar because they do not hit the points that get others more exposure

Hmmmmm the first thing that comes to mind is @mmmthornton 's analysis on Tolkien which just perfectly describes him for me and hits the nail on its head for why he's a lot more complex and defined than the fandom at large give him credit for being (and of course how why him and Stan make perfect sense #stolkienagenda) and just all the aspects about him I love that's so underrated and unappreciated by the fandom at large. Creators that come to mind that get him RightTM for me is the aforementioned @mmmthornton and of course @thatsmyassbrostop, I think especially pertaining to his self-consciousness, his own unique dumbassery, his own unique charisma, his ignorance, his emotional intelligence, and just things that make him, y'know, human and not just another stock, unoffending, blank character most people default to.

I also have to mention the king @pcstan and his Shelly pieces dissecting her trauma, her complex relationship within the family that always is ignored within the show and fandom and just generally appreciating her for the very real teen girl she is (angry, awkward, insecure, etc) that we don't really see much of in TV (esp in this day and age 🙄). I've loved our in-depth talks about Shelly and her potential and he's really made me grow a new appreciation and fondness for her.

And of course I have to shout out @urspopinionsareshit for like...a lot of things, really. I feel like out of anyone I've come across in this fandom she's been the one that really understands Kyle as a character, and her very detailed posts going in so much depth has really made me re evaluate and grown a deeper appreciation and understanding of Kyle which had been frankly watered down previously through the fanon for me. And honestly the same goes for Stan, too - I was frankly never a fan of Stan until very recently, and I found her posts going into detail about the actual Stan we see in the show - emotional, sensitive, with nerdy interests - made me realise there was a lot more depth to him that I actually enjoy. I may not agree with all of her opinions, (mostly stupid stuff, like music taste lol) but her blog honestly breathed in new life in my love for this show and its characters.

I'll be honest and say I haven't consumed a lot of South Park fanworks in the last...I wanna say five, four years (maybe more?) for many reasons which of course includes my dissatisfaction with general fanon over the years, so my list is quite short here - and doesn't even cover all my favs, like Kenny, to name one. I just don't really have much to reference anymore, and I think I'll only trust a few to recommend me any fic or comic or whatever that I *might* check out, lol, but for the most part I'm happy with my little corner of the fandom for now.

I hope this answered your question nonnie lol, sorry it wasn't much.

[scrapimmortal]

I love Kinn an unhealthy amount, and so far, no one's been able to give me a tangible reason why they hate him.

Majority of the people I've encountered who dislike him seem to do so because their fav character envies him. Kinn might also represent someone in their lives who brings out their insecurities through no fault of theirs.

Makes me love him even harder!

I think a lot (not all, but a lot) of it comes from people who like Vegas, and unfortunately people's media analysis/literary criticism skills don't seem to reach beyond "my favourite guy hates this guy so i also hate this guy". And in the case of Kinn and Vegas that is SUCH a shame, because first of all, essentially, Vegas is not Kinn's victim and Kinn is not Vegas's victim. I'd argue they are both victimised by their dads pushing them into this meaningless competition, and it's plain sad. Second of all, I'm not even convinced Vegas actually hates Kinn. I think he's envious of Kinn, yes, but I think most of all he wants his attention. He spends the whole season doing all kinds of shit to Kinn, but actually the worst Kinn does to him and the worst thing he *can* do is... ignore him. He doesn't really think about Vegas very much unless Vegas is messing with him. So that's what Vegas does. I think that’s why he relishes the moment when he’s pointing his gun at Porsche much and draws the moment out, because he has Kinn’s attention like NEVER before. And this is slightly off topic but it makes me sad that in-depth discussions of this are getting lost in making Kinn a fandom punching bag and Vegas a sad little puppy. Anyway.

I'm the same way anon! And I think it makes sense, truly, to start loving a character more and more when they get a lot of senseless hate. You see, when people wilfully ignore the what's on their screens and come up with nonsensical reasons to hate a character, in this case Kinn, it just makes me want to understand them more. It makes me really look at their scenes where a lot of people don't really care what's on their screen, they've already decided to hate this character and will do all kinds of mental gymnastics to back up their stance (seriously, don't their backs hurt? because my back is fine. It's easier to love Kinn than come up with bullshit reasons to dislike him). If fandom is unfair to blorbo for no reason, I will give blorbo the benefit of the doubt every single time. And I'll only be louder about how much I love him and how he really is!

Anyway, I love my mess of a gay, big-tidded, soft, ruthless, smart, dense, confident, work in progress, cheesy and horny mafia boss and I always will

[andtheyweresiblings]

For your "Madrigal's reaction to Brumira" or whatever it was called, I'm surprised none of the family, to some extent, blamed themselves for such a thing happening. I could totally see at least a few of them wondering if things would be different if they hadn't treated both Bruno and Mirabelle the way they did in the past.

I also feel like there might have been more pushback against the more dire, severe consequences from the Madrigals who likely knew or at least guessed at what was happening, depending on how powerful their specific gifts are, even if they don't actually support Bruno and Mirabelle, and are just neutral.

I apologize for the delayed answer. I had to read through that post again. Link to the post for context.

You raise some good points. The post itself is squarely in the headcanon/fanfiction space of character analysis, so it's wildly speculative and comes down to preference in how one might like to see everything play out. That being said, if the Madrigal family found out Bruno and Mirabel were romantically involved, it would be a very complicated fall-out. More complicated than I would have time to get into in any one post.

If you wanted to be hyper-realistic about it, I think you could write a full-length novel several times over to really explore what is going on in each family member's mind. So yes, I agree, there's definitely a lot more that would happen if Brumira happened and the Madrigals found out.

So let's explore the two points you raise a little more in-depth.

Self-Blaming

To an extent, the Madrigal adults would be blaming themselves. But it's more complicated than that, and putting the blame onto oneself is uncomfortable. And it is something we don't see the Madrigal adults do well in the film.

Sure, we get the Disney ending of Alma acknowledging her part in the collective traumatizing of her family, and we've got the Madrigals acknowledging that they are family unit, so they each played into that cycle/system. But the reality of generational trauma is so much more complicated than that, and recovering from complex trauma is not typically linear. So if we're going to be realistic about this, we can't expect these freshly recovering family members to sit in self-blame for too long, especially if self-blame wasn't part of their original role.

Alma never blamed herself until after the climax of the movie. Julieta felt some responsibility over the trajectory of Mirabel's role in the family, but it doesn't seem like she or Pepa felt too at fault with Bruno's estrangement. Augustin admittedly is a little harder for me to read (because I haven't watched the movie in a bit), but from what I remember, he was upholding the status quo that Alma set and encouraged Mirabel to do the same.

That is to say, none of the the adults who probably do share some of the blame for setting up the 'ideal' conditions for Brumira to occur are used to accepting blame.

That denial Pepa and Julieta are experiencing? That shame Alma is flooded with? That anger and sense of betrayal Augustin is feeling? That's all their way to process the bomb that is Brumira. It's also a really good way to avoid that nagging thought about what role they might have had in all of this. So yes, they probably do blame themselves deep down, but it is not something I imagine would be at the forefront for any of them. Not primarily, at least.

I suppose if anyone is going to be blaming themselves about Mirabel and Bruno, it would probably be the wrong people. Like Luisa and Isabela.

(Well, Isabela may have more actively estranged Mirabel, but considering the context of the film, it's harder to put real blame on the Madrigal grandchildren, in my opinion. I guess if we're rating things, Isabela is next in line for perpetuating the family cycles as oldest grandchild, but I think I'm losing sight of your original point.)

Anyway, I could absolutely see Luisa incorrectly blaming herself. Self-blame was part of her role.

I guess my point is that the strain of discovering Mirabel and Bruno are a couple would likely catapult many of the Madrigals back to their pre-movie roles.

Madrigals' Push-back in Defense of Brumira

I embarrassingly completely misunderstood your second point and didn't realize it until after I had already typed out a response for it. I'll probably post that separately because it was fun, but I'll get to what you actually asked now.

So yes, I agree with you. In my head the Madrigals who are neutral to Mirabruno would find their ways to push back against Alma's sentences for Mirabel and Bruno.

The Madrigals who would be helping our couple in this AU are Luisa, Isabela, and Dolores. Isabela and Luisa's help would be somewhat delayed because they are close to Alma and their parents, and therefore, they would be trusted to be a part of enacting the sentence. Ultimately, Isabela and Luisa are conflicted about the whole thing, but I think eventually they would come around to Mirabel's side. Especially when they see the toll everything is taking on their sister.

But, they would have to lay low and strategize first for this to work, and then they would have to work to build back Mirabel's trust.

I think Dolores and Mariano would be working as messengers for Mirabel and Bruno. Dolores would definitely know where Bruno is, and she would probably send Isabela, Mariano, and Luisa to check on him when they can manage it. In this way, Isabela and Luisa will probably be the ones eventually passing the messages to Mirabel and Bruno. But, again, it just might take some time for everyone to get to that point.

To add further complication, I think most of the Madrigals helping Bruno and Mirabel would still want to figure out how to resolve this to a point where Bruno and Mirabel be rejoin the family as a couple. It might not be realistic, but it would definitely affect what type of help they think they can offer to Mirabel and Bruno, which is why I think Luisa in particular would struggle with letting Mirabel run away.

Mirabel running away to Bruno would effectively mean the family is broken for real. I think Isabela, Luisa, and Dolores would all want to prevent that. They would want a way for all of their family members to still be a part of their lives, impossible as that may be.

Thank you for the ask! It was fun thinking about and exploring this AU again. I should do it more often.

[mahalshairyballs]

More on Jakey (or a day ending in -y)

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Of course I've been thinking more about that anon ask I got yesterday. So much that I actually dreamed about Jake last night lmao

I've been thinking about the little bits of fics I've written in some posts on here, and how maybe it's true. Maybe I didn't show to full range of Jake's personality in what I've published.

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I've written a lot about him, but I haven't written all that much *with* him, especially in scenes where he's more vulnerable. Mostly because I write bite sized fic passages on here, and the scenes where we see more the depths of Jake's emotions are longer and more complex to write.

The scenes where he shows his true emotions outside of their mind also get very heavy and depressing so....

I've shown the first important conversation Marc and Jake have in their innerspace and that one was pretty heavy too. It did show more of Jake caring about Marc though.

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This long post is separated in two parts

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First one, a bit more character analysis of Jake (because I haven't done it enough lmao)

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I've written Jake & Marc fighting and being annoyed by each other, because that's entertaining. Same with Jake poking Marc, he gets some entertainment from that too.

Those are mostly the innerspace scenes with Jake I've posted. So yeah it showed him as more antagonistic.

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Jake being defensive and antagonistic towards Marc

I've explained that one before. I'll expand on that a little bit here. To me it makes sense.

Jake is the most 'prideful' of the system. Because he defines himself by what he does, that's the only thing he had. But his biggest critic is himself, just like with the othet boys. Even more so with him though. Jake doesn't have the abyssimal sense of self-worth Marc has, but he's extremely perfectionist and harsh with himself. At the slightlest perceived fault he made, he'll be on his own case. And he'll just expect even more so from himself next time. Jake is Khonshu's precious boy, he's his perfect avatar. He rarely, if ever, disappointed Khonshu. But he's constantly disappointing himself.

Jake rarely ever feels shame, he never had anyone to embarrass, but he does feel disappointment from himself and others. And that's something he hates. He doesn't want to disappoint anyone.

So yes, he has the pride and ego the others lack, but that's because of what he does, of the only things he had in his life, of the fact that he's his harshest critic anyway and also because it's an extension of his role as a 'shield'.

As much as he doesn't want to be the emotional protector and says his role is only being the physical protector, his role still has repercussions on his emotions and personality. Him being defensive is an extension of his role as a 'shield', he's shielding himself too. It's a form of self-protection.

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Those apply, again, way more with Jake's close circle than with anybody else he interacts with. Gina, for example, would have *no idea* he's like that.

Layla & Frenchie know he's like that a little bit, but not how truly a big part of him these are. Only Steven & Marc will find out, and only Khonshu knew.

So for starters, there's that in between Marc & Jake's relationship.

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And then what fuels Jake's antagonism and defensiveness even more is that Marc *started* to be acerbic with Jake first. Their subconscious prevented Marc from knowing about Jake for a reason. Marc freaks out about Jake and he just can't accept him. This hurt Jake *a lot*. So Jake meets Marc where he's at and lashes out too.

It's like with Steven and Marc in season 1. The main difference here is that Jake doesn't forgive Marc while Marc always forgave Steven.

Marc also doesn't give Jake the opportunity to forgive him. He's always in attack mode when he thinks about Jake or talks to him or even sees him.

*Marc* has to learn to care about Jake. Jake cares a lot about Marc, even if he doesn't want to admit it, he always did. And again, it's when you're heartbroken that you can be the most cruel.

Jake is also bitter, because he thinks Marc wants to prevent him from having a life of his own. Before Marc had no control over that, but now? Jake isn't really wrong here.

So that's why most innerspace scenes I wrote with Jake had Jake angry/rude/purposefully antagonizing Marc.

And Jake is *very* easy to anger in the innerspace, but that's not the only emotion he has. He has *all* the emotions in here.

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When Jake doesn't want to deal with Marc and/or Steven, or with his own emotions, and wants to have a little time off, he has a few places in their mindpalace he likes to go to be alone. That bar we saw in that new issue of Moon Knight? That's one. The other one is his cab. Not necessarily the white limo from the aftercredit. Maybe his first cab if he had any before that. He goes there to just take a break. Be in silence for awhile.

He doesn't want to go there to think, he doesn't want to think about anything. He goes there to take a cigarette, take a drink and just be.

Steven does join him in his cab after they start to get along. Jake becomes way less shitty towards Steven the moment Steven gives him a chance and gets less shitty with him too. They do talk about a lot of things there, important things, emotional ones too.

Jake can be, surprisingly to Steven and Marc, very mature, very wise and give great advices on tricky situations. But then be very immature on some other stuff.

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Hiding versus Suppressing

Marc is the one who suppress his emotions. Jake doesn't. Suppressing emotions means Marc doesn't even allow himself to feel them. He tries to bulldoze them away, and that can cause a lot of problems in the long run.

Jake *hides* them from others, but he doesn't suppress them. He trained himself to be able to show an emotion sometimes opposite to the one he's feeling. He knew anyway that he wouldn't be fronting for long, and within a few hours max he'd be able to freely express them in their innerspace.

Now though, Jake is fronting for longer and longer. He still express his feelings internally but he has to keep fronting while doing that.

Why did he start doing that anyway ? If he's not ashamed of anything.

Well, other than because of the dam metaphor I've talked about yesterday, Jake does it because he doesn't want to attract attention. He's been used to not being seen, to do his things without anybody realizing he was there. Visibly showing off strong emotions would *attract* attention. Jake would be a really good spy tbh.

So that's another reason why he trained himself to appear so mellow, so level-tempered.

Again, if someone sees Jake being externally upset/showing negative emotions, know that he's feeling those at least 10x more strongly internally at the same time, that's when he 'cracks'.

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Now here's a few fic scenes I've thought about but haven't actually written yet, for a reason or another, showing Jake's relationship with other people.

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Second part, fic scenes ideas I had to showcase more of Jake's range of emotions

Flirting

I've shown him flirt with a few people, mostly to show his fun, charming side. So that one has been covered a little I think.

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With strangers

I do have a small scene with only Jake (and Khonshu?) and his internal thoughts. It's a bit of an exploration of where he's at at the beginning, and how a random waitress saying his name (and not being called Marc) can brighten his day significantly.

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With Steven

I've thought about a few conversations between them, mostly in the innerspace.

One I remember isn't super fun, but it does show that Jake cares about Steven. It's about Jake finding out he gave Steven a traumatic experience unintentionally when they were younger. Steven's memory of it resurfaces and they talk about it.

I think I could also write one with Jake helping Steven through his anxiety. Steven is usually the one who fronts to calm things down when either Jake or Marc are about to break down, but Steven also has his moments of heightened emotions. Mostly with his anxiety. So Jake fronts when Steven is about to get an anxiety attack. And sometimes Jake talks to him, helps him through it, since he's been there. He found his own tools to control his anxiety.

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With Layla

I've shown how they'd get that flirty UST going on. They'd also become really good friends but I don't have any specific scene to show for it right now.

I did note down the dialog for their first few conversations though. I could write that one, although Jake does feel a bit distant at first, that's intentional. He's cautious and Layla just found out he exists, he doesn't know what she'll do and she doesn't know him.

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With Khonshu

Jake does care about Khonshu, and I've explained why before. He doesn't want to stop being Moon Knight because he's developed a real relationship with Khonshu.

I wrote one minific with only them before, I don't have anything else ready enough with these two to post right now however.

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With Jean-Paul

I talked a lot about how Jake loves Frenchie, how they've been fucking for years while Jake pretended to be Marc, how they're dating etc. But I haven't *written* any of those scenes when they're together did I?

There's a few I've been thinking about that I could write. Mostly when Jake reconnected with Frenchie for the first time (I did like that dialog but I didn't write it down 😭), or when Frenchie gives him the 'what are we' question, or when Marc interfered in their relationship and tried to 'break up' with Frenchie (but that's a very pissed off Jake soo xD), or Jake explaining a little more to Frenchie why he avoids physical touches, or Jake trying to get more physical with him.

I can do most of them right now.

I think I wrote one about Jake deciding he wanted to be able to give/take physical touches now, but that was a scene with Layla and he ended up leaving because it was too much.

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With Matt

I've thought of a few scenes with Jake/Matt. After all, it's Jake who starts flirting with Matt, and he does this *for* Marc. It's one of his ways to take care of Marc, to do something nice for him. But Jake catches feelings for Matt.

I had a nice moment showing Jake's progress with touches and Matt's understanding of him.

There's also scenes with Marc regretting his decision to not take Jake up on his offer with Matt, then Marc kissing Matt as Jake. In that one Jake gets through a lot of different emotions lmao.

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Is there any of those people would like to read ? Which ones should I write next to share with you ?

Please I need more feedback ❤

[horrorsteve]

about ronance: i think it's a shame that they didn't do more w their relationship bc i think nancy does miss having a close friend to just talk about things with & robin could definitely be that (shipping aside). nancy just seems a bit lonely when she's not with the gang fighting monsters, like she doesn't have anyone to talk to except for jonathan, and he at least hars argyle to talk about nancy with. idk i think they should have given them a bit more development instead of all the stancy nonesense. that being said, i think people will ship whatever, and at this point their relationship in fanon is better so like, it is what it is.

def agree, nancy needs a friend, especially a girl friend. and i think robin and nancy could someday get there...... maybe? but im inclined to say no. theyre just not compatible friendship or relationship wise. do they make good investigative partners? do their different intelligences bounce off each other well? definitely, and i think nancy needs someone like robin to question her and keep her in check. but nancy is a very ambitious, academic, by the book sort of student with a strong curiosity. robin is witty, open minded, creative, and playful, though undeniably still very smart and talented. it's just that their smartness manifests differently, and from my experience these two types clash a LOT. plus there's this autistic vs allistic pull and push between them that makes it so hard to socialize and we see that nancy just does not understand her the way steve does. i think if they were given more time and their differences and dislike of each other (at least on robin's part, bc she didn't seem to be a fan of her in s3 but now she wants her to get with steve????) more depth i could get into it more.

i'm also not really a fanon kind of person, i'm more interested in canon and analysis type approach so it just doesn't do it for me unfortunately :/

[yesterdanereviews]

Meet Dave (2008)

Film review #598

Director: Brian Robbins

SYNOPSIS: An alien spacecraft in the shape of a human lands on Earth in search of a device that landed months earlier, that will drain the salt from the Earth's oceans. Piloted by a crew of smaller humans (including the Captain who is the spitting image of their ship), they attempt to blend in with the crowds of New York City. Befriending a single Mother named Gina, the aliens learn about Earth and grow to admire it's population. But as this threatens their mission to save their own planet at the expense of earth, not everyone is happy with this...

THOUGHTS/ANALYSIS: Meet Dave is a 2008 sci-fi comedy film starring Eddie Murphy. The film begins with a meteor falling to Earth and being found by a young boy. A few months later, a spaceship in the shape of a humanoid falls to Earth to look for the meteor, which is in fact a device to drain the Earth's oceans of it's salt. The ship is piloted by a crew of tiny humanoid aliens, including the Captain, whose image the ship is apparently based on, and the ship, attempting to blend in as a human, heads around New York City to find the meteor so that the aliens may save their own planet. Meeting Gina, a single Mother who accidentally hits "Dave" (as the crew refer to themselves), with her car, the two strike up a friendship and as the Captain learns more about the Earth, the less he is willing to sacrifice it to save his won world. The story is a very predictable affair, jumping from set piece to set piece that are each familiar and well worn in similar movies. Everything also feels very cartoon-ish, and unable to develop any depth. Gina's friendship with Dave never expresses something more profound; in part due to her scatter-brained character, in part because I think the film maybe wanted a romantic element to it, but it never goes in that direction either. This is compounded by another issue I will mention later. There also just doesn't seem to be any direction to the plot at all: sure, the aim is to recover this meteor, but it never feels like that is the primary concern. Even when it is recovered, the film just carries on doing things which don't further the story or deepen the character's relationships.

A lot of the film's issues undoubtedly stem from the film being passed around a lot of different writers before it was finalised. Apparently, the film originally was going to be a bit more adult-oriented, but nowhere is this evident in the final version, which seems to just had every element neutered by the chain of writers that seem to have imagined the film for different audiences. Again, this leads to the film avoiding any sense of depth at any point, as the script tries to meet itself half-way at every possible point. The film is unable to create a significant connection between Dave and Gina, it resolves Josh's "bully" problem in one quick scene, and the ending that romantically links Gina and her neighbour is something that more or less comes out of nowhere: there's one brief scene prior to the ending that hints at a romantic connection, but it in no way builds itself up to be one of the take-aways of the film. We also know next to nothing about these aliens home world, culture or anything of the sort, which makes it difficult to understand just what they are getting from their experiences on Earth.

I suppose if you want a positive from this film, Eddie Murphy works well in the lead, given a fair amount of space to be his animated self. It's just a shame the script doesn't offer him much more. Gina (portrayed by Elizabeth Banks) is again animated and energetic, but her spritely aloofness renders her character a caricature unable of fathoming any emotional depth. Number Two as the villain is bland, ands again, because we nothing about these character's backgrounds, it makes it difficult for them to stand out. Kevin Hart's role as a kind of cutaway slapstick character is pointless: mostly because one; Eddie Murphy's character has that role, and overshadows anything Hart does. Two, he clearly has no creative room to do anything interesting other than just scream a bit. If this was a more adult-oriented film, then maybe he could cut some more significant and risqué, but as it stands, he barely has anything to do. Production values are also fairly sloppy with some atrocious greenscreen effects for the time.

Eddie Murphy has been quoted as saying his role in Meet Dave is among the worst he has been in. It's hard to disagree with that, although I don't think it's really his fault: the script has no direction, depth, or any idea who it's aimed at, thanks to being shredded and blended by a mix of writer's that results in a middle-of-the-road venture that doesn't even try to stretch itself beyond that centre. It's no offensively awful in any way, it's just bad in the sense it's unoriginal and uninspired, opting for safe, well-tested jokes and scenarios, ultimately wasting the talent it has on board.

[minkmousesworld]

I really like your in-depth analysis on Tanjiro and I thought you brought up a lot of good points; that last line about a good villain can only found in a story with a good hero was great and true. So what about yandere Tanjiro with demon-slayer who does not like, maybe even hates him, because they very clearly see him for what he is? No amount of peer pressure or emotional manipulation can get S/O to change their mind either; they use any of that behavior to fuel their discontent with him.

thank you, honey,,,,, I am very pleased to know that you liked my analysis <3 and I liked the idea of the dark tangirou, it's definitely a good concept. I apologize for the wait, thank you for your words♡

✮ — linden honey

[1400 words]

series — yandere | format — drabble + headcanons

warnings... unhealthy relationship / yandere (obsession, possession, delusional thinking, isolation, manipulation), unrequited love, fight

Tanjirou is not as openly manipulative and clingy as Zenitsu, and not as wild and easy to manipulate as Inosuke. He is softer, more gentle — like a snake cat that you decided to warm on your chest because of purring and rubbing against you.

And when you get close, you don't feel unsafe; because even if there are dark sparks in the depths of his eyes, who doesn't have their secrets, right? Maybe you don't approve too much of this form of hypocrisy, but at least he is polite and sweet, unobtrusively caring and worrying about you. Tanjirou has a shyly hazy look, rough but pleasant hands and restrainedly amorous smiles, and although he is a little too friendly, almost on the verge between 'charming persistence' and 'vile insolence', you first close your eyes and let him.

It's worth a lot when you are regularly forced to fight for your life to the death.

... This soft sympathy quickly becomes the moment when he starts to disgust you — it's a little problematic to communicate sweetly with a person that you see through. He almost imperceptibly climbs into your life, step by step leaving his footprints here and there, continuing to sparkle with his innocently shameless eyes, as if he does not understand why you start to move away and push off.

More smiles, more soft looks, almost plaintive submissiveness and timidity, awkward giggles and shyness that becomes sadness. Tanjirou tries so skillfully to play on your feelings that everything soon begins to look like an elegantly woven web — if you hadn't seen these threads from the very beginning.

The butterfly does not get caught in the spider web.

☙ You are coping well with emotional manipulation and pressure — and Tanjirou is not sure if he is glad that you are so persistent and confident or disappointed because harmless methods have not justified themselves. It's amazing, he's very proud of you, — because he can't love even more, — but your indifference to him only depresses him more and makes restless.

Your disgust and unwillingness only gets stronger, and even when he tries to apologize or correct mistakes, like a puppy wagging his tail pitifully, you just leave. And it breaks his heart more than if you yelled at him or scolded him — at least he knew what he was doing wrong.

Please don't come near me anymore, you disgust me — he is not sure if he can blush even more with shame, hiding his eyes, and does not answer anything, clutching self-made cookies in his hands. The surrounding people definitely do not approve.

Your words, of course.

Shouldn't you be a little softer on him? Even if you don't accept his feelings, you should have refused more gently. After all, don't you feel sorry for him? He's so sweet-hearted. You want to say that it's not your fault that he only understands rude language, but instead you don't say anything. They won't hear you anyway. Sweet hearts are too charming.

Maybe you didn't win the battle, but you didn't lose the war.

His cookies (which he definitely did not bring and which you definitely did not accept — someone helped him) end up in the trash anyway.

Disgusting. If you could, you would probably hit him (after all, the years have taught you that the most powerful weapon is a weapon), but you know that he won't even cry if you do it.

Sometimes he was so helpful and submissive that you felt like a monster.

☙ Thoughts are like a breath of wind — if you were not the object of gossip and glances, then you would even admire how good Tanjirou is at manipulating the opinions and controlling the feelings of others, almost without doing anything persistent, as if it really wasn't caused by his behavior at all.

But when you show indifference, this tactic collapses.

Tanjirou does not know how to become intimately close, does not know how to shorten the distance apart from social communication, and when neither society nor habits in the form of "gift giving" and "service" help him, he gets lost. What can he do to change your mind? He becomes upset and tired, which is why his usual gentleness begins to dissolve into nervousness and apathy.

People do not feel and fly like butterflies to the light, not realizing that it is the light of a flame, while Tanjirou no longer wants to be a "warming bonfire" — your indifference and disgust for him only poisons him more. Any step should be weighed, any decision should be considered, his mother was also hard at first, but she coped, and he should also hold on and believe — but he really can't anymore. The father easily agreed, he was the same and allowed her to leave him next to her, but you are not like that, you don't want to, and you don't even let him understand how he should behave, what he should give you, and he begins to fail.

Manipulation? Courtship? "Catch me"? "Prove that you love me"? Persuasion? Tug of war? Quarrels turning into hugs? Mutual dancing on a rake? What should he do to make you happy with him? Isn't he caring enough? Isn't he good enough? Isn't he smart enough, or persistent, or clingy, or soft, or tame, or unavailable? What exactly is he doing wrong? Is he not in love enough? Do you think his feelings are false or wrong?

... wrong.

You just don't like him, do you? It doesn't matter how much he loves you, or how perfect he will be, right? If siblings love him because he's a good brother; his friends love him because he's a good friend; people love him because he's a good boy.

If he is loved, it is because he plays his role well.

But you don't love him even when he tries to be perfect.

You push him, you throw away his cookies, you don't smile at him anymore, you don't want to have anything to do with him — and you don't let him know exactly what he's doing wrong.

His mother taught him that if he was hardworking enough, he would get what he owed.

He may not be worthy of you, but he cannot live without you.

And if you hate him anyway, then the way doesn't matter.

One day you will understand why he is doing this.

☙ ... In the end, the tactics of ignoring and pushing away will not lead to anything good. Tanjirou copes hard when he realizes that he can't do anything, and any of his attempts are useless, and if you openly push him out without even trying to give him delusional hopes, then this only inclines him more strongly to use more radical methods.

He is not one of those who will force you to create a family or create a couple, but he must fight for the sake of family and for the sake of love, and he will fight — even if he has to fight with you.

If you see his real personality, but do not see the consequences of your actions and influence on his mental state, then you are always one step behind. This may work as a temporary measure until you come up with a long-playing strategy... but sooner or later you will realize that even if Tanjirou seems so awkwardly romantic, trembling even when touching hands or trying to get close to you lovingly, it is better to keep him close to you — only then he will be safe.

His goal is to become your ideal mate and create a family, and only then does Tanjirou stop manipulating and all these strange features, becoming safe and unobtrusively sweet until he sees danger for you and is sure that you will not leave him.

And it's really not that hard to break your desires, submit to circumstances and let the person you hate so much snuggle up to you. At least no one is asking you to have a healthy relationship — as long as you're around, he doesn't care how you treat him.

As long as you're around and don't cheat on him, he'll let you do whatever you want.

And sooner or later you will love him.

He doesn't really know how to be a victim, but he'll learn quickly.

[no-face-no-shame]

Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway (so how to kill a franchise before it could fully unfold)

Ranking for people who really don't care: 3/10

The Peter Rabbit franchise is close to my heart and that's why I'm petty enough to write an actual analysis like this one. Actually, the first movie inspired me to finally start writing short stories for children. So it's important to me. And the original stories are sweet, adorable and timeless. However, Peter Rabbit 2 is a literal crime against cinema. It would be enough to say that around the 40th minute I was honestly considering turning this shit off, which has never happened before (I've managed to watch a lot of Marvel movies and didn't turn them off. It says something about my resistance to trash.) But PR2 reaches new levels of being a shameless cash grab with amount of effort and soul similar to "Ralph Breaks the Internet." Ok, characters in Ralph are still more interesting. PR2 single-handedly murdered everything the first movie managed to achieve, making sure that the stories about the mischievous bunny go to hell, shameful and forgotten. Even Domhnall Gleeson, amazing as always, couldn't save it.

Let me take you on a fucking trip through the depths of rubbish. And let it be a cautionary tale about the state of modern children's movie industry.

Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway is the summary of what's wrong with modern children's media. As I've mentioned before, it's just a shameless cash grab to make kids want to buy plushy Peters. I think that at some point there is also some product placement but I'm not British so I simply don't know that brand. Ah yes, the non-western immunity. This is not a production made to entertain children. No one thought about kids while making this trash. Ok, maybe the actors did. Hard to tell. But not the producers. This movie is a few centimeters away from being self-aware and realising that they are telling the story of their own production. Soulless rubbish that makes children pull on their parents' sleeves and yell "buy me! buy me!" until the tormented adult gives in, deep inside culturing the deep hatred towards that damned rabbit. I'm pretty sure that there will be no more continuations and that's good. As a fan of the franchise, I have to say that lack of continuation is the best thing that can happen to it, at least for now. The harm is done. A lot of people won't remember the original, old books. They are left with the utter trash the second movie is, ruining the positive impression left by the first one.

In both PR1 and PR2 there were two writers, one of them being also the director (Will Gluck.) And I don't know what happened in this man's life but the sequel feels as if it was written by someone completely else. Where's the decent pacing? Where's the interesting, gripping plot? Where the hell is basic consequence? Not here. Maybe it's because the second writes has changed – Rob Lieber in PR1 and Patrick Burleigh in PR2. Whatever it was, it led to the biggest problem of the movie – an absolute chaos.

The action starts rather not long after the end of the first movie. Thomas and Bea get married, Thomas is to stay and everything seems to go well. Animals got access to the farm again, except for Tom's tomato patch. Peter decides to change, become more responsible and stop being a total asshole. The thing is that he still doesn't get along with Tommy which leads to a few misunderstandings. Not very interesting plot premise, though it has some potential (not that the writers used it. Nope.)

Bea's career blooms as her book about adventures of rabbits gets accepted by a publisher, Nigel Basil-Jones from Gloucester. The audience immediately can tell that he's an antagonist – charming but very obviously manipulative, Nigel steals Bea's heart (and Tommy's too, tbh. Thomas is so fucking gay for him.) There is only one problem in form of publisher's vision of the future books about Peter and the rest. Peter is shown as "The bad seed", the guy who always ruins everything. Deserved but he doesn't like it. That's why he walks away, totally not bothering to express his displeasure in any constructive way.

On the street he meats Barnabas – an older rabbit, experienced and street smart. Together they do some typical for those movies damage and end up getting caught by the pet service. Barnabas recognises Peter's jacket and claims that Peter's father was his friend. While Bea signs the papers with Nigel, completely ignoring very obvious bad intentions of the publisher, Peter and Barnabas get adopted by a definition of a spoiled, rich brat. They go through some serious animal abuse but manage to escape from the cage when the humans aren't around. It turns out that it was all a part of Barnabas' plan – he gets into people's houses and steals the food. He also has a gang consisting of a rat (he's kinda funny) and two sibling cats that are such bleak character that I don't remember anything about them. I've seen that movie yesterday. The great escape is a painfully unfunny sequence of animals beating up the mother of the awful kids. She deserved it but still. It was just bad.

The gang is impressed with Peter – they were scared of the woman and almost abandoned their haul. Thanks to him they get everything. Barnabas asks Peter to bring his siblings. That idiot does it. Ok. Thomas and Bea find Peter and take him back to farm. Next day they roll down some hill or something like that. Thomas has a raging breeding kink (I will elaborate on that later.) The movie keeps beingboring. Peter and his siblings meet with the gang – it turns out that the fluffy criminals are planning to steal dried fruit from the farmers' market. Why? The movie explains that the dried fruit are easy to carry around, don't go bad that fast and are nutritious. Two of the gang members are cats that don't eat dried fruit. Remember when I said that the plot makes no sense? Yeah.

Tommy and Bea talk to Nigel again. The publisher plays that Disney game, [resenting them with more and more idiotic ideas on how to make the stories about the rabbits more profitable and easy to create the merchandise for. This movie is so close to being self-aware. Tommy is gay and jealous, confronts Nigel in a box gym about Nigel's manipulative influence over Bea and almost gets his ass beat. Nigel snitches to Bea and the freshly married couple argues (one of many signs of this relationship being dysfunctional.)

Rabbits get other animals to help with the farmers' market idiocy. Of course Barnabas is our second twist villain – he used them to get more food. Who would have guessed? Probably everyone who's perception is more developed than the one of people who enjoy Boss Baby. Peter realises he fucked up, rejoins Thomas and together they get back all Peter's friends that got sold to random people all around the world after getting caught by the pet service. Tommy jumps from a plane. No, I don't even care enough to elaborate. Wow, happy ending! The characters drive back home and speak out the moral of the movie in the most awful way possible. The end, finally.

So, what's the problem? Fucking everything. There are more holes than matter in this cheese. Barnabas didn't need any help with stealing the dried fruit. The operation was painfully simple. I'm pretty sure he would've done it on his own. Nigel is not a good villain because he didn't get enough screen time – he's good and convincing, just forgotten in a movie where he's supposed to be quite important. The sequence of rescuing the animals at the end of the movie lasts like a minute and is a pathetic attempt to recreate the sequence from the first movie. Overall, the story feels hollow and messy. Too many characters that you don't care about because they aren't developed. Surprisingly borking movie full of action that's just stupid, especially compared to PR1. There the plot was simpler and this is literally why it works. Here? It feels like one of Nigel's stupid ideas on how to make the franchise worse. Oh, the irony.PR2 is boring and predictable in every single aspect.

2 – Characters

Peter

Thought he's a stupid cunt in the first movie? Rotted for the mad Thomas because he was at least hot? Well, then get ready for Peter getting even worse. The movie tries to tell you that he wants to change, that he finally understood what's wrong with him. That he went through a redemption arc. But guess what? HE DIDN'T. He didn't change at all. He's as unstable and annoying as always. Nothing about thus character makes me like him. In the books he's way nicer, like a real kid that is just curious about the world. The movie Peter, and especially the PR2 Pete, is one hell of a motherfucker that would be way more useful to the society as a meat pie.

I hate James Corden and can't wait for the movie industry to realise that he is a bad voice actor. Really. He is just bad. The movie has an attempt to be self-aware here, with Peter asking people if his voice is annoying, but it doesn't work because his voice isannoying in an unenjoyable way. Shitty job, that's it. I'm especially disappointed since in my native language the dubbing is amazing and adds a lot. Here? Hell. Just make a meat pie out of him, Thomas. It would be community service.

Thomas McGregor

Call him JFK because he got assassinated with a style! PR1 is a good move mostly because Thomas carries it. He's a rare case where an added character (not present in the original stories) literally saves everything. He was insane, he was pathetic, he was funny. And a little bit sexy, though that's just a side effect of employing Mr Gleeson. Magically, PR2 kills ALL of those traits. They made himnormal. He's just a pathetic loser without that doze of insanity that made him an incredibly catchy character. He used to be the perfect "crazy, hysterical, gay-coded guy to laugh at." Nothing from that is left. He's basically non-important. He doesn't even have that much screen time, and when he does he's just in the background. Even Domhnall Gleeson's great performance isn't enough because the script didn't let him do what he had to do. He's still the funniest element though.

He lost his sharp side, he lost his madness. Ok, he makes funny noises. Gleeson has great control over his voice and it shows – his screeches are hilarious, I admit. But it's not enough. And what's up with the freaking breeding kink? Like half of his lines are about how much he wants to reproduce with Bea as quickly as possible. Even though neither of them should ever have children. In PR2 Thomas could've been as well replaced by any other random guy. "Sorry, Tommy died, here's Bob." And it would be basically the same.

Pont 3 – Thomas and Bea have no chemistry. That was something that bothered me in the first movie too, but now I see that it was three heavens above PR2. I don't see a couple, I see strangers. He has 1000 times more chemistry with Nigel. Fuck, even with Peter. With literally anyone but Bea. I have no clue if Domhnall Gleeson and Rose Byrne like each other or not, however after this movie I'd say that they are at least a bit hostile. Their interactions are sometimes almost painful to watch.

Bea

Movie industry, please learn how to write women. Please. I'm begging on my knees. In both PR movies Bea is the most bleak, boring basic bitch possible. But PR2 adds something new – now she's also stupid. Congratulations, writers. Well done. She's always had problems with being naive enough to be manipulated by animals. Here she's just a painful idiot. Nothing else to say about her. I didn't like her much in the first movie, now I don't even want to think about her. Also, just as with Thomas – she has very limited screen time. And the writers decided to use like 90% of it to show us that she's stupid and naive. The only interesting thing she does is disagreeing with Nigel at the very end. But without that the story wouldn't have its moral so it was obvious from the beginning. Lord, give me patience.

Nigel

Somebody PLEASE get this man some screen time. David Oyelowo is really good in his role. Charming, attractive and convincing. The only problem is that his character is even less than two-dimensional. He didn't have a chance to show what he can do. Still, he used every damned scene he had. A waste of a decent potential. Nigel is a personification of this movie's very approach towards the franchise – never-mind the quality, we can get money of that.

Barnabas and the gang

Obviously antagonist from the beginning. Yeah, that's basically it. Barnabas' motivation makes no freaking sense. It is said that no one wanted him and so he grew old, unwanted in the pet store. Then he escaped and decided to do some damage. The thing is, we see him being adopted almost immediately in one of the scenes. One could argue that it was because of Peter's presence, however I don't really agree. The girl could've said "Mum, I don't want that ugly old one. Just the young one." Boom. Didn't happen. She took both. And Barnabas literally says that getting adopted and then robbing the house is his regular method of acting. He regularly gets adopted by people. His motivation makes no sense and it feels like the writers just didn't know how to explain his behaviour.

Other rabbits and the rest of the animals

Not much to say. They are exactly the same. I feel like the chubby bunny, the actually nice one, got even less content than in the first movie. No, the running joke about either Flopsy or Mopsy changing her name to Lavatory and being high on sugar isn't funny (I can't tell them apart. Oops.) Someone kill the fucking squirrel.

3 – Humour (or lack of thereof)

Not funny. The first movie was. It had a decent mixture of slapstick and good lines. Here isn't gone. Jokes got stupider and more vulgar. One of few actually cool one was ruined by the delivery (the one with deer and flashlight/torch.) Generally, the timing and delivery of jokes is extremely poor. They just don't land. Thomas is the funniest motherfucker but it's not enough. Mostly I was cringing. And yes, you could say – dude, you're an adult. This is a kid's movie. The thing is that I can tell a good joke from a bad one. Children deserve a good quality humour and PR2 doesn't deliver it. PR1 is fun both for kids and adults. If I went to the movie theatre with my kid, we would have a good time. If I went with my kid to see PR2, we would probably end up killing someone just to feel something. Or we'd go to a restaurant. PR1 was cool because it had some risky jokes, sometimes with darker themes. PR2 is the definition of sanitary shit that kid's movies became. Nothing darker, nothing risky, we need to sell the merch. Effect? No laughter. Cringe.

And, for Lord's sake, stop putting random famous songs in your movies. I got flashbacks from Shark Tale era of animation. Fortunately, the second half of PR2 kinda forgets about this and there are less songs. No, this shit won't make your film appear cooler to kids. It's bad, unfunny and awkward. Somebody please kill that fucking squirrel.

Conclusion

Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway is the summary of what's wrong with modern children's media. As I've mentioned before, it's just a shameless cash grab to make kids want to buy plushy Peters. I think that at some point there is also some product placement but I'm not British so I simply don't know that brand. Ah yes, the non-western immunity. This is not a production made to entertain children. No one thought about kids while making this trash. Ok, maybe the actors did. Hard to tell. But not the producers. This movie is a few centimetres away from being self-aware and realising that they are telling the story of their own production. Soulless rubbish that makes children pull on their parents' sleeves and yell "buy me! buy me!" until the tormented adult gives in, deep inside culturing the deep hatred towards that damned rabbit. I'm pretty sure that there will be no more continuations and that's good. As a fan of the franchise, I have to say that lack of continuation is the best thing that can happen to it, at least for now. The harm is done. A lot of people won't remember the original, old books. They are left with the utter trash the second movie is, ruining the positive impression left by the first one.

What I find the most painful is that at this point the movies have nothing to do with the original stories. Those were made for children. They were made to make the audience happy and cheerful. This is what kids deserve – moving stories made with soul. I hope that the younger generation of content creators will bring back stories like The Tale of Peter Rabbit or Winnie The Pooh. Intelligent, bitter-sweet but filling the audience with hope and joy. If not, then our children will drown with ad-filled, sanitised hollowness that can't make anyone feel anything.

[casually-inlove]

Hello, I thoroughly enjoy your in depth analysis on 19 days and wanted your opinion. If you had to classify each character as a personality trait what would it be? It doesn't have to be their best or worse. Thank you!

‘Lo! Anon-san, I’m sorry, I know you asked this question yesterday, but I didn’t have time, so I’m kinda late with replying. Ofc it’s always a pleasure to know that people find shorts bits I write entertaining/interesting.

Concerning your question, it’s very thought-provoking (somehow it made me think of Tarot cards hmm) even though I doubt I’ll tell you anything ground-breaking. 

Momo

To me, one of the most notable qualities that define him as a character is his ability to persevere. Let’s face it: life hasn’t been kind to him. He’d faced prejudices based on people’s ignorance regarding his father, he’d faced having everything taken away from him — people theorize that the restaurant where everything went south belonged to the Mo’s, meaning that they were relatively well-off and thus had lost both their status and money. We can also gather that Mo had been ostracised and isolated by his peers, which supposedly led him to fall in with the wrong gang — that one of She Li — where he had been treated like shit and ostensibly made to participate in questionable things. Even now he has to deal with his family debts and debts collectors that go hand in hand with that. Despite all that nasty stuff he doesn’t break down, doesn’t become a completely embittered ball of hatred. Doesn’t stoop to debasing himself either — that’s something commendable. The thing is that his perseverance often takes a form of withdrawing into his own shell. While it’s a perfectly understandable defence mechanism, it’s also a double-edged sword: Mo doesn’t trust easily, doesn’t see the need to let anyone into his life. His views of others are skewed and tinted by his often tragic experiences. Moreover, he’s obstinate in doing so. Once his views are set in stone, he’s reluctant to change them. With that said, I do believe that he represents tenacity mixed with obstinacy. 

He Tian / He Cheng

With He Tian, I’m a bit on a fence, ahaha. I’d say that one of the key traits that define him for me is his self-will, his streak to do things as he sees fit. Given his history of acting haughty (bossing Mo around), it’s both a flaw and a boon. Nevertheless, I do consider it to be his strong suit. He had a spine to see that his family (father presumably) is up to no good. He had a spine to break away from them, to realize he’s his own person. He had a spine to start living on his own — again presumably at a very young age. While some may say that he’s always had everything handed to him on a silver platter, it still takes a LOT of balls to start living on your own when you are fifteen or younger, and it takes much more to rebel when your family dabbles in criminal activities. I should also point out that despite being headstrong and willful He Tian’s also selfless and kind, even though it may take on twisted forms. There’s also something else that defines He Tian for me, and that is his ability to put on a facade, to grin and bear it. OX has shown several times that he’s lonely and suffering deeply from his past traumas, yet when he’s out there, he never shows the world his pain. Nobody knows how much hurt is hidden behind those eyes. Again, it’s neither good or bad; still, it takes a strong character to keep on smiling despite feeling dead inside. This stoicism is a trait he shares with He Cheng, though HC takes it up to eleven.

Zhan Zheng Xi

We see so little of his inner world which is definitely a shame. For me ZZX embodies moderation. He always seems to be reserved in things he says, things he does, in things he wears — and he’s completely fine with that. Also, he gives me an impression of someone committed to being organized and punctual. He’s the one to keep his head cool whenever the duo encountered Mo, to the point when he de facto refused to twist Momo’s balls. In general, he seems to think a bit before acting — but that is not to say that he’s always the mature one. However more often than not it was ZZX who prevented (or tried to prevent) Jian Yi from doing foolish stuff. So I think that moderation suits him well, as banal as it may sound. 

Jian Yi 

He’s the one that is most amiable and open among the other boys. I believe it stems from him having a lonely childhood — we saw that other children often bullied him too, and unlike Momo, he didn’t have his mom there for him most of the time. We also know that Jian Yi longed to have a company — to have physical proof that he’s not alone. And this is partly what drives him to ultimately forgive his wrongdoers and to hold no grudges against them to the point of becoming buddies. We see it happen with Momo and that girl who had a crush on ZZX. So he could definitely embody amicability. However, there’s another trait that he seems to represent, at least to my mind. And that is giddiness. He’s effervescent, very lively, always in motion, nearly always acting on his whims. His mood is very protean too — you could argue that his ability to change his attitude towards those who wronged him is also a part of his mutability. Again, this is neither a good nor a bad trait, yet it makes Jian Yi very flexible when needed. In that regard, he’s the opposite of Momo, who’s slow/reluctant to change. So yeah, for me Jian Yi represents the ability to change and adapt. 

Regarding other characters, like She Li or brother Qiu, I think I’d like to have more input data before assessing them. I’m sure that both of them are fascinating and simply didn’t get the chance to steal the spotlight yet. Again all of it is just my opinion. It goes without saying that OX has put an incredible effort into creating multifaceted characters that are so much more than they appear to be at a glance, and they simply cannot be described with just one trait.