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𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍 !
﹐🍒﹔levi ackerman
➥ conspectus﹕you can only save so many, before your identity is eventually revealed. not only have you been temporarily stripped of your rank as captain but the ones who you called your friends have even grown suspicious of you. especially levi, but he was never just only "a friend", was he?
➥ pairing﹕levi ackerman × captain!titanshifter!reader
➥ cw﹕levi & the reader have a complicated relationship, that's basically it
➥ part(s)﹕part 1 ➤ part 2
➥ occurs﹕during the female titan arc
a/n﹕this might have spelling mistakes because i didn't proof read it.
I feel a presence in front of my cell although my eyes are closed, I don't make an effort to open them. "Petra's still alive, her left leg is completely crushed. She probably wont even be able to fight again, at least not like that."
The hopelessness and slight sadness in Levi's voice echoes through the otherwise empty cellroom. I open my eyes, the soft lights flash. Levi's shadow creeps into my cell, he's not too far from the bars but far enough.
"I'm glad she's stable," My sigh is audible, I'm disappointed in myself for haven not been able to save everyone but ultimately. The deaths of Levi's squad was not my fault, I did what I could.
The weight on my shoulders disappears. "How is my squad? And Eren?"
"Your squad is fine, and so is Eren." Levi doesn't explain further, I can't blame him.
It's quiet again, Levi seems to lost in thought. It's easy to read his face despite the fact that it never shifts. It's all in his eyes, as a Captain, it was expected of me to be able to read people.
"I let you in my bed,"
"And you never once told me you were like Eren." Levi's eyebrows knot into his head, his face twisting up into a slightly agitated look. I can tell he's trying to come to term with the fact that I basically "lied" to everyone, especially him for years. How was he supposed to know I was one of those shifting bastards, the same things that killed so many of our comrades.
Eren was different, only just discovering, but I always knew.
I don't say anything, not sure if I even should speak.
We're both still, but as time passes, the space between us slowly shortens.
I can't look at him, not now.
My eyes are glued to the dirty floor. Levi steps closer to my cell, a hand gripping the metal bars. "You didn't trust me?" It's a question I expected to hear. I keep my mouth shut and my head lowered. My sigh is audible, guilt eats away at me, especially while I'm alone in this cold empty cell. Nothing to accompany me but a bed and a sink. Relief does wash over me when I hear of Petra's survival.
The deaths of Levi's squad wasn't my fault, I did everything I could with my late interference. Yet, I struggle to realize that. "It's not that easy,"
I turn my head, from Levi's perspective I probably look like I want to block out his words, pretend that they aren't getting through to me.
I shake my head. "This was supposed to be a secret between myself and I, no intruders."
That word, it sounds a bit passive aggressive: "intruders"
His clasp on the bar tightens, It's a cold gaze, but he's not angry. I know him well enough to tell apart his different types of internal struggle. His tone is quiet, calm unnerving almost, yet it has a hint of irritation.
"Well then I guess I'm the intruder," Levi takes a step back, crossing his arms over his chest. I don't respond to his comment, choosing to ignore it entirely.
"I enjoyed our time together, Levi. As friends, comrades, lovers or now enemies."
I'm getting beside myself, stalling isn't going to soften the blow in the slightest. "Whatever you'd like to call us."
"But even those closets to us have their secrets."
He's quiet for a second, taking in my words. His eyes still glued to me. He pulls his eyes away, trying not to pity me. This isn't exactly an ideal discussion, neither of us wants to bring up our past "relationship". I can't tell if his expression shifts, subtle changes in his expression are difficult to spot in this lighting. The silence drags on, agonizingly so that it's angering. I'm getting tired of waiting for him to say something and my mouth opens before I can stop myself.
"Why are you here?" My words escape my mouth in an uncertain fashion, they're shaky, I'm not sure if it's from anger, sin or whatever feeling is stirring in my lower gut right now. He doesn't answer, choosing to stare at me. Maybe he's also waiting for me to add something, but I keep my mouth shut.
Levi's hands drop to his sides and it feels like an eternity has passed before he says: "I wanted to talk."
"About? Petra? My squad? Eren? Erwin? What?"
"You could at least have the dignity to look me in the eye while you speak," The words come out cold, but there's no anger behind them.
"We're adults, don't you think it's time we have a proper discussion?" I slowly raise my head, my eyes meeting his.
I never got lock eye contact with Levi since our last nightfall encounter, I remember him building up the confidence to at least try and be vulnerable with me. Deep down, I can tell that he's still holding onto that. His facial features remain mostly stoic as usual, but through his irises I see a silent plea for us to talk.
"What else is there to say?" It's a rhetorical question, somewhat.
"A lot," He responds too quickly, but I don't comment on it. Maybe I'm not the only one who was affected by our separation. It's my own fault that I was thrown into this cell anyway. We're silent again. I can't figure out what he's thinking anymore.
"Nobody is mad at you for transforming," Hange's voice echos, they drag a chair along the concrete floor of the cellroom. The sound is beyond irritating, forcing me to cover my ears.
"You saved a lot of people." Hange's acknowledgment lets me breathe a soft sigh of relief, at least they don't see me as some traitorous monster. Though, despite that I consider their words to be false in some way. What if they were just saying that to make me feel better.
"Though, I am wondering why you didn't come forward sooner." Hange examines me with their eyes, gauging at my body, my arms, my legs, my face.
"It wouldn't have changed anything," I counter.
"Is that what you think? It would've changed everything. Did you think we'd harm you?"
"No, not necessarily after Eren's trial."
"But you still hid."
"Yes."
I don't even try to deny the obvious.
"I'm not even going to try and continue to ask you these questions that Erwin prepared." Hange's voice is laced in complete defeat.
"You know, usually friends tell each other everything."
I pause.
"What?"
That was sudden, was Hange trying to get a react out of me or something? Most likely not, that would be unlike them.
I can't look them in the eyes, I refuse to. The walls, the ground, the cell-door, anything except Hange's eyes. It was like they were staring into my soul, making me uncomfortable on purpose.
"Yeah... that's what friends do."
Hange leans back in their chair, it letting out a creak.
"Do you even consider us your friends?" Their question is unexpected yet also expected, but it still hurts to hear. It makes my shoulders tense.
My teeth grind against each other, slowly chipping away at them, my hands balling into tight fists at the sheer audacity. Such things shouldn't even be asked, years together yet everyone questions the likelihood? In the same breath, I can't blame anyone but myself. "Yes, don't ask such questions."
They let out a low hum, their eyes narrowing slightly. Despite that, they didn't seem angry with my response. Instead my answer must have satisfied them in someway.
.
.
.
How long has it been? I feel like it's been forever, though, maybe the day hasn't even passed. I'm not sure at this point. There's no window to confirm my suspicions and Hange just up and left almost an hour ago?
Was it really an hour ago?
Am I dreaming all this? No way this is real, just the other day I was with everyone, chatting and securing the safety of my squad, being the captain i was assigned to be. Now what have I become? A monster stuck in a cell with no way out other than to unleash chaos.
It would be beyond reckless to transform, especially in this kind of space.
Maybe I should've taken on Levi's offer to talk.
Maybe I should've had Hange stay just a bit longer.
© zekescherries 🍒
#titan shifter!reader#levi﹒ackerman﹐⟢﹔🍒#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#attack on titan x reader#attack on titan x you#shingeki no kyoujin x reader#shingeki no kyoujin fanfiction#levi ackerman x you#levi ackerman x reader#levi x reader#levi aot#aot#aot x reader#aot x y/n#snk#snk fanfiction#snk x reader#aot fic#snk levi#shingeki no kyoujin imagine#shingeki no kyoujin levi#captain levi#levi attack on titan#levi ackerman#attack on titan fanfiction#snk x y/n#snk x you#aot x you#aot fanfiction
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ok so i read @cherrly moana x lmk fic and i really liked it!!! but it gave me an idea on macaque's powers
so, you know how macaque is refered to as the Moon?? the moon shines on the sky every night, but how does it do that?
it reflects the light of the sun
now, macaque is shown to be able to absorb Wukong's powers by MK, apparently by just spending time with him
but its never quite the same.
the moon can reflect the light of the sun, but it will never be able to shine as bright as it. it only holds a glipse of the power it has.
(also. macaque is the only one shown to be able to use LBD's ice powers without being possesed. like yeah bai he and wukong could also do that but a) possession b) wukong is wukong, he can mostyl handle it and C) bai he was the main host. she might have been able to posses wukong but it's shown how her using her powers might have destroyed bai he if she wasnt careful. Not even the Mayor could use it and whatever was inside him was strong enought to possess The Great Sage. just something to add)
idk its just something i thought ramdonly byeee-
#he can absorb people's#powers#idk what i'm doing with this idea but it is definelty an idea#i was going ot add something about his abilities acting similar to a parasite but couldnt really expand it beyond#lmk#stuff#idk if any of this makes sense but thats just a though#and my thoughts normally dont make a lot of sense mosto fthe time#its like#i have so many ideaa#but if i try to explain them i wont be able to#since i lose the core of the idea somehow#it feels like my thoughts are all racing againts each other to see which one i'm goign ot talk about#but they keep tripping into each other and never really make it to the end#its weird
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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job
#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me#oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving#but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done#and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be#and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything#and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else#and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch#and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me#that i wont find an easier job than this one#well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else#by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think#which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free#and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok#i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god#but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face#and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus#anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore#but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh
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its funny bc im still living because theres stuff i want to consume (books movies etc) but apart from that i dont want to live. in the sense that i dont want to do what people do, i dont have the courage to be in a relationship or to risk my fragile stability for vulnerability and real connection and it will kill me, how i will never be happy because im too afraid to dare and do what i know i should do to try to give my life actual meaning.... but also im way too fucking afraid of dying
#. 🦴#im crying for no real reason#im about to go on holiday with them and i feel so pathetic and ugly and i wont be able to be alone#i will have to explain myself to my ma and i will have to confront myself and im tired of doing that#god i wish i wasnt so afraid#i feel like i should have dealt with all of this when i was sixteen and saved myself the trouble#its ten years later and only now im facing all those insecurities head on and i feel like a child in a grown womans body#im so tired of living like this but im too afraid to try something else#i dont even know where to start
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Tag drop: Guizhong (don't mind me re-dropping this with the fixed ones, shh)
#guizhong. [ many things only seem to surface beneath the moon's poignant glow. wherever its light shines; the heart is wont to follow. ]#guizhong: ic. [ wherever her spirit may be among the countless grains of sand and specks of dust between the harbor and the mountains. ]#guizhong: countenance. [ and because they are afraid; they try so hard to become more intelligent. this i understand. ]#guizhong: introspection. [ although she did not live to see the splendid sights of today: she was as much a hero as any other. ]#guizhong: meta. [ her manuscripts lie unfinished in her abode. the blank pages give cause for contemplation on what might have been. ]#guizhong: little notes. [ she always sought to make everyone happy and one must say: she had quite the gift for it. ]#guizhong: wishes. [ it took a treasure hunt just to preserve the commandments that were once the lifeblood of a whole civilization. ]#guizhong: etc. [ we think of human life as like a lantern that's lit one minute and extinguished the next. but are we adepti so different?#guizhong: mortals. [ at their full potential; they could be her equal. a human who has as much to teach an adeptus as to learn from them. ]#guizhong: guili plains. [ as guizhong once said: “it takes every blade of grass and every flower to make a homeland.” ]#guizhong: liyue. [ perhaps she will look at the liyue of today and steal a smile when she sees the prosperous land that it has become. ]#guizhong: realm of clouds. [ a voyage to a sanguine sky. ]#guizhong: mechanical arts. [ in one's heart; i knew that she was indeed the superior talent in the mechanical arts. ]#guizhong: glaze lilies. [ they were far more abundant back then. the entire fields would appear to the eye as a veritable sea of flowers. ]#guizhong: adepti. [ until the moon set and the sun rose. and only then would the banquet finally come to an end. ]#guizhong: morax. [ whoever it was that revered her so much was very clever indeed. ]#guizhong: guili. [ with shortness of breath; i will explain the infinite. and how rare and beautiful it truly is that we exist. ] delusiona#guizhong: marchosius. [ who would dare snub the stove god and his wondrous creations? at the sight: we would all drop any argument. ]#guizhong: streetward rambler. [ it almost felt like she was back again. sitting right there on the stone stool next to me; chatting away. ]#guizhong: cloud retainer. [ we each had our ideals; and neither one of us would yield to the other. ]#guizhong: skybracer. [ to who lived by the mountain; he was their savior. they thought higher of him than they thought of the lord of geo.#guizhong: osial. [ she would disrupt the silence around them with a hum; as if to sing along to the harmony of water. was this his song? ]#guizhong: sea gazer. [ he was quite the braggart when it came to those collectibles he was so fond of; he always loved to show them off. ]#guizhong: ganyu. [ if we planted flowers in the guili plains; do you think that one day we'd be able to recreate the sea of glaze lilies? ]#guizhong: v. descension. [ she descended whose dominion was over dust; and whose reach shrouded the skies for thousands of miles around. ]#guizhong: v. guili assembly. [ it's great to have it back but i want to go back to the world. and start with guili plains. ]#guizhong: v. archon war. [ they fought upon the plains; where black dust choked the heavens and a thousand rocks splintered. ]#guizhong: v. present. [ all wrapped up in a city that has existed for many moons to date. all these things: they are why people chase it. ]#guizhong: inquiries. [ hmph. she always had a way with words. ]
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the worst part abt watching movies w my parents is when they Dont Get It and so it falls on me to explain it to them, but when i use words that sound smarter than how i usually speak they give me that Look of vague confusion and judgement and it makes everything not fun anymore. this is also the reason for my various undiagnosed mental illnesses and also the fact that i am so heavily in the closet about being trans-
#this post is probably not as funny as i want it to be but at the same time im so srs#i hate when it falls on me to explain the weird things to them . bc i know they Dont Get It#and no amount of poorly worded excuses about why i like a weird thing will make them understand but they still expect me to say it.#and they will Never Get It.#which means i will also never be able to come oit to them comfortably because this is one of those things they wont get !#and thats ok! but i dont want it to be my responsibility to explain it. because im not as eloquent as i would like to be#and i frequently misspeak and get overwhelmed in conversations like this and nothing ever comes out right. sigh#yes this is about asteroid city but its also about annihilation and spiderverse#and the lego movies and marble hornets and trigun and homestuck and.#most things i enjoy have an overtone of grief or self discovery or coping with things you cant understand#or trying your hardest to live a meaningful life in a world that doesnt understand and is sometimes actively hostile#and i never know how to put that into words that my parents will understand#this post is maybe a little too personal but. sigh. its hittin me pretty hard rn#bc theyre grilling me about why i liked asteroid city so much and all i can say is. shrug emoji#delete later
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Ykno the common critique I've seen around is that trimax fights r hard to follow & such. And I've always had the kind of thought of like "I mean sometimes it can be confusing, but if u stop to study it it's really not that bad"
Having a fight analysis post kinda blow up tho I'm seeing ppl comment over and over in the tags about how hard it is to keep up with the fights... and I'm just like. Is it really that confusing? Like genuinely. I thought it was one of those overblown fan critiques but it seems like a Lot of people agree with it.
#speculation nation#in the original manga Yea fights were pretty hard. took me a Lot of squinting to figure out what actually happened with the Nebraskas#but idk most of the fights r just vibes. u follow along and feel what the characters r feeling and the fine details dont matter.#a lot of times i do end up flipping back and forth between pages bc there r details revealed later on that make earlier things make sense#or just looking for clarification. that kind of thing.#so yeah it kinda does take some work to fully understand it but i kinda figured that's like... how manga fights go...#i much prefer this over the common shounen trope of stopping the fight to explain every single move that's done#so im just like 'come ON i already understood it!!! can we keep going already????'#is it the fact that nightow doesnt do this that makes it so confusing??? so ppl dont get the play by play as it happens???#this all probably sounds obnoxious but im just genuinely trying to make sense of it.#i guess im also just a perceptive person when im paying attention to smth. maybe that's what it ultimately boils down to.#one person commented saying theyd kill if i did play by plays for all the trimax fights lol#i probably wont for All of them bc that sounds like quite a project#but if another catches my attention in this same sorta way... then maybe.#i guess understanding nightow's fights is a skill. probably at least partially assisted by being able to read the sound effects.#oh yeah. that's another thing lol. i can read the sound effects. and that especially helps with knowing how many shots there are#stuff like that. 🤔 yea i dunno. i wasnt expecting that post to get so many notes.#but it's well over 400 now and still counting. waking up to 99+ notifications is... an experience lmao
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we have now reached the stage of family vacation where i have a meltdown
#mmmmmmm they were just straight up playing an antivax youtube video on tv . it took every ounce of my composure to not burst into tears on#The spot .Ive now gone to bed early so i can go cry very quietly upstairs in my bathroom#its just. it makes me insane my family is so fun and awesome until it comes to their politics !!!!!!!!!!#i try not to think about it very often .but sometimes im just hit fully with the fact that if they knew who I truly am .#there is a scary scary chance they would just never accept me.#its so easy for ppl to say oh if they wont accept you just walk out and leave they never really loved you anyway#but it’s so complicated in real life i cant just leave my family i love them !!!! they love me !!!!!they are all I have#and the thing is I never talk to them about this stuff .i have no idea how they would react and it is Scary#i ache with my whole being sometimes to just share everything with them. im so tired of secrets .it hurts I just wish i could just live#openly with them like some people do#but the possibilities and consequences are just far too grand for me for now#so I just live in this limbo. and I do a good job most of time ignoring the fact that I do#but sometimes (like tonight) it just hits me all once .the weight and burden of all that I hide from everyone.#pride month especially. it can be a very hard time for me#oh I think I hear ppl coming upstairs now gotta make it look like I haven’t been crying bc i do Not want anyone to ask .i will not be able#to answer without sobbing and I cant explain slash excuse my way out of this one without talking abt what’s really going on#And I don’t want to have that conversation for a Long time#ok byebye#kat post
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I guess part of the reason i take care of my grandma is because I want to know what to expect when I'm around that age. It's hard to imagine what that must be like and considering I share a lot of traits with my grandmother, I'd like to be as prepared as I can be. I'm not sure if I'm hoping I'll make it to that age or not. I'm not sure if life will give me that.
#personal#i know its the loneliness that gets you#so im trying very hard to build and maintain friendships. maybe ill go live in cohouseing when im older. hopefully ill have a partner.#I'm not scared to go to a nursing home. in fact the scarier option is not being able to afford a nursing home.#jesus christ. do you ever think abojt that.#who will visit you when you are old. your friends grandchildren since you dont plan on having any#maybe ill have a partner with kids from a previous union. im sure that wont drive me insane.#isnt it fucking crazy that ill always be me. ill always be this person. even if my traits change and i get older. it'll still be me.#its fucked when you look forward in life to when you'll be old and the only thing you want is to be loved#i dont want success or achievements. i want to be loved. but im so so scared of that !!!!#i dont understand why people like me and asking them to explain doesnt help because i wouldnt know what to say if they asked.#its allegedly not about accumulating enough positive traits to be worthy of love but i dont know how to do it otherwise#i have to be worth loving. there has to be perks that come with the baggage.
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BABEEE happy birthday!! (i'm so terribly late i'm so sorry) congrats on 23💖
🐥 so i'm having thoughts right now about luke x reader and physical affection. like maybe one of them being touch starved and always craving the other person's touch and the other person noticing it and doing it more? maybe from platonic (i will go down with best friends to lovers) to romantic, i'm just on this brainrot tonight
🐥🐥🐥🐥🐥
luke castellan x reader
a/n: back from the klerb but here with a classic 4am post 🥂 but the hangxiety wont let me rest until this is out! ill edit this in the morning... or not 😗
wc: 1.1k
—
It’s hard to miss what you’ve never had.
Luke Castellan was never a touchy guy. Sure, he’ll hold a new camper’s hand during welcome tours (especially the little ones who can barely keep up with his long legs; if they’re lucky they get a piggy back ride), and he won’t shy away from a clap on the back when his strategies for capture the flag bring his team to victory (they always do, mind you), and when he feels like it, he’ll even shove Annabeth playfully to show her he adores her (but she packs a punch now that she’s older).
It never really goes past that, and he’s never had to think too hard about it—physical touch.
He’s the one who takes care of others—a part of his nature like it is for Hermes’ cabin to take in unclaimed demigods. But something changed in the months that he’s gotten closer to you. At first, he’d bite his tongue at the way you’re so open to patting his cheek when he does something funny (which he doesn’t try to make a show of, but now…), how you choose to sit so close to him during bonfires that your knees touch (the Apollo kids could be singing about the heavens falling down on them for all he cares but he zeroes in on every word that leaves your lips), and the way you’d lock your fingers with him for a pinky promise after every little thing ‘to make sure it’s real’ (Luke didn’t understand the merit of a pinky promise over whether you could have his dessert for the next week if you took over arts and crafts with the kiddie campers for him; truthfully he’d give it to you anyway). It was unusual for him to have someone comfort him, to show care without a true reason. But he didn’t realize how much more it bothered him now that you wouldn’t even look him in the eye.
Silena and some of the other Aphrodite children had asked you the very defining question of, “Do you like Luke Castellan?” and having never thought of it that way, or being able to put your feelings for him in words instead of fingers in his belt loops or in the muss of his curls—that shit was terrifying!
You spent all Saturday afternoon at the docks with them belly down under the glare of the sun’s rays as they explained to you what the five love languages are. By the end of it, sunburn wasn’t the only reason you felt hot.
“Your love language is physical touch,” one of Silena’s older half-siblings—Connelly, says like he’s explaining that the sky is blue, “And Luke’s not that type of guy! Think he’s more acts of service…”
“Ooh, or words of affirmation….” another one of them muses, but the sound of your heartbeat tunes it all out. Well shit, have you been sending him the wrong signals? Or are there even any signals you want to send him?
Nevertheless, in the matters of love or even the tiniest whisper of it—maybe there’s no one else you can trust with this stuff besides Cabin 10.
Wrong.
Absolutely wrong. Whatever the hell you’ve been convinced or whatever’s changed since last weekend—Luke just knows he hates it, and he’s angry. He’s angry at how you gasp in surprise every time you brush shoulders during archery practice when you used to let him fix your form, he’s angry at how you’ll squeeze campers’ shoulders to tell them they’re doing a good job carrying the strawberry crates—and all he gets is a mumbled ‘Thanks, Castellan’ when he stacks them up and takes your load.
Luke’s so terribly angry that Travis told him he’s been walking around like a big strawberry, face red and irritated—but not at you.
He realizes he’s also angry at the fact that he can’t protect you from the onslaught of a rain cloud—or maybe it was the fact that you’re so okay with the rain touching your skin and seeping through your orange shirt like he wishes you’d let him. He’s angry at the way the wind blows your hair into your face and your fingers brush the strands away like he wishes he can. Most of all, Luke Castellan is angry that he didn’t know how good a simple touch could be until he lost it—before he even really got to appreciate yours.
You’re sitting on the opposite end of the row in the amphitheater laughing with your friends and the furrow in his thick brow is a tell-tale sign of his discomfort. Luke doesn’t dare to remember what it’s like before you to be honest—he’d rather give up Elysium instead of having you ignore him like this. He calls your name, a tinge of both anger and desperation until you look over at him, eyelashes kissing your cheeks. The hold you have on him transcends the physical touch of your fingers but he wants, no—needs you next to him.
“C’mere! Why are you so far away?”
Luke hopes it doesn’t sound pathetic, but a crooked grin splits across his face as soon as you make your way over, sitting down and crossing your legs away from him. It’s still too far, even if he can feel your breath on his shoulder.
“Did I do something to make you angry? I…” The words escape his mouth in a jumble—quick wit from his father escaping him, though he knows not to rely on that asshole, god or not. You mutter words that almost escape him too, and he leans in, chasing your hands and putting them in his own until they’re gentle and soft in his lap.
“No, no…. I just… don’t want to push your boundaries. I know you don’t like it when I’m too touchy,” and he thinks his heart clenches a little like how you’re squeezing his hands. Luke shouldn’t feel instant gratification from a subconscious action. He wants to know you mean it with him—that’s what he can’t put into words.
“I….like it when you do.”
You notice the way his fingers tangle tighter with yours, pinkys interlocking with yours. When he lets go, Luke wraps his arm around your shoulders until you’re able to laugh in the crook of his neck. He chooses to place a kiss on the corner of your mouth when your head sways to face him at the silly tune about centaurs and then you realize that Luke loves the way you love him. You wonder if he accidentally missed meeting your lips, but then the noise in your head quiets down when he pulls you closer, lips locking tenderly, intentionally—as they were always meant to.
You both hear a giggle that sounds a lot like tinkling bells belonging to children of Aphrodite.
For once they were wrong about love.
Luke’s tongue parts through your lips and meets your own like they’re in a long awaited embrace, dancing and devouring you from the inside out but this, you— are what he can rely on. This, your touch, and how he chooses to let it consume him, never letting go.
#jo's 23rd birthday bash ⋆。°✩#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan fanfic#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo x reader#made by ma1dita ♥︎
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Hii!! I love your writing for LADS 🫶🏻🙈 may I request you write for Sylus talking to the most famous or beautiful woman of N109zone or of princess mafia in a exclusive event while the reader is watching them afar with her jealous energy? Then right after; the reader feels needy, possessive, wanted love and smutty 🔥, don't want to talk to Sylus, and it leads to miscommunication/don't get the wrong idea trope. You can add Luke and Kieran as cameo to make the situation worse telling the reader about Sylus and the girl's history together with a sense of humor that doesn't make the reader feel any better then Mephisto there CAW CAWLING over the fact seeing the reader turns red in frustration 😡😂 I really appreciate and love your work! Hope it be a little long word count (with bulletin points) if you write/accept this request! 🙏🏻
this is so booktok coded and you can interpret that however you wish bc i have Strong opinions about booktok and the current state of media literacy - but unfortunately i am a sucker for the trope and even if this isnt super duper smutty i do love a good jealousy plot - just as a heads up as I say w longer requests - i wont do everything and smut is harder for me to write so in interst of you not waiting months for a request we're gonna go a little off of what your reuquest was bc i also got confused reading it - which is why i always recc not to be too detailed bc then i get pigeon holed and focused on the wrong details :( - ive also combined these two requests bc theyre p similar to me!
You are fully aware that Sylus needs to work with a lot of people for his job. He's got powerful connections because of these events and you've never had a feeling that he was unfaithful. However, that doesn't mean that you can't help but feel insecure when you see how beautiful some of the people he works with are. You know that he loves you and he makes it very clear with his actions but the way he easily smooths things over with that dulcet tone of his.
You're resigned to having to spend the evening with Luke and Kieran - not exactly a punishment but also not the greatest as they give you the whole scoop on everyone Sylus talks to. The way their breaths catch and the quick darting of their masks to you lets you know that there's something else you're not being told but they refuse to let you in, citing respect for the boss' privacy. You know that you won't be able to get them to snitch on him at this rate, forced to watch as he continues to butter her up for whatever reason. You saw the way that others looked at her and for a moment you wondered if he was looking at her the same way, trying not to overthink things because you're also aware of how much he loves you.
You watch angrily as Sylus wraps his arm around her, whispering something into her ear that makes her laugh. The twins look at you and despite being unable to see their eyes you know they're just as confused as you are. They don't stop you when you get up to leave, deciding to follow you. They know his personality well and know that it seems a little out of character for him to be so forward during a meeting.
You decide to go back to his home, locking yourself in the bedroom as you deliberate on what to do. You know you could confront him if you really wanted you but part of you doesn't even want to do that - you feel like you'd be more content to see him grovelling and begging for you to forgive him but you also know he really isn't like that. So you decide to ignore him.
He comes home later that night, fully intending to explain himself but when he sees you fast asleep he simply decides to slide into bed with you. He holds you through the night, not knowing how upset you are with him. In the morning you're gone and he finds that he can't seem to reach you. You run around with your tasks for the day, barely saying hi to him in passing. He knows you're not that busy so it makes no sense to him.
He ends up having more meetings with the woman, much to your anger. After an especially long meeting he finds you standing outside of his office, an angry expression on your face that he just can't take seriously as he finds you adorable. He leans down to give you a kiss and you end up yelling at him about how you know he's giving her more than just his business.
You actually didn't know anything - just that he was far too friendly to her and you wanted to see what he would admit to. He immediately starts to set the record straight, telling you that there's no way you seriously believe he's looking at anyone that isn't you. You cross your arms stubbornly, telling him that isn't going to work on you.
It ends up not mattering when he picks you up to throw you onto his bed, covering you in kisses as he digs his nails into your hips. You can't escape his hold, bent this way and that way as he teases you for really thinking that he sees anybody that isn't you. He calls you possessive names, moving against you in ways that make you see stars over and over again.
Safe to say your new silent treatment to him is not because of you not wanting to speaking to him. Your voice is hoarse, body barely able to leave the silken sheets on your skin as he continues to dote over you with reminders that it'll always only be you.
#love and deepspace x reader#l&ds x reader#sylus x reader#l&ds sylus x reader#lnds sylus x reader#lads sylus x reader
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Obey Me brothers + dateables with an artist MC who uses them as a reference
Warnings: None?
Genre: Fluff?
Reader: Gender neutral, artist
Requested: no
Character: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodius, Beelzebub, Belphegor, Simeon, Barbatos, Diavolo
Lucifer
• The first time he noticed you staring at him he immediately stiffened and asked you what you were doing.
• After you explained what you were doing he told you "As long as you dont get in the way or mess with my work you can do what you want"
• When this becomes a common occurrence he barely notices when you are glancing/staring at him
• He is secretly happy that you would choose to use him as a reference for your art.
• If you were to ever give him a art piece then he will thank you. The way he thanks you may seem like he is kind of neutral towards your gift but he is actually really grateful for it and genuinely loves it.
• He would hang it either in his office or bedroom.
Mammon
• The first time he noticed he probably got sort of nervous and said something along the lines of "What are ya doing human?"
• When you tell him you are using him as a reference (either you drawing him or seeing proportions) he relaxes slightly and would probably say something like "Of course you would use the great Mammon as reference. Ya wont have to pay me this time but the next time this happens i will charge ya" he wont.
• As you continue to stare at him he will pretend to be relaxed and calm but he is so anxious because YOU are using HIM as a reference for your art. If you pay close enough attention it becomes pretty obvious he is freaking out
• After a few times of this happening he actually does start to relax when you start staring/drawing him
Leviathan
• Unlike Mammon who was trying to hide the fact he was freaking out, Levi full out panics. He is thinking of a million possibilities of why you would be staring at a 'yucky otaku like him' (his words not mine)
• You staring at him because you were using him as a reference was not one of the possibilities that crossed his mind
• He would question you why you would use him as a reference. When you say you thought he was a good reference and why not he would be skeptical and continue to question you.
•Once you convince him you genuinely want him as your reference he will stop questioning you but become a bit more anxious.
• I dont think he will ever fully get used to you staring at him when drawing but he will calm down enough to not fidget and to be able to play his games and watch his animes without glancing at you alevery five seconds
• He will ask you to draw his favorite characters. If you do he will treasure those drawings forever
Satan
• Much like Lucifer he will stiffen and ask why you are staring at him, but unlike Lucifer he will be fairly calm about it after you tell him what you are doing.
• He may ask you if you want him to do something.
• If you tell him no then he will go back to whatever he is doing (probably reading a book.... most likely it is a mystery novel)
• If you say yes he will do what you requested as long as it is within reason (like asking him to turn his head slightly)
• If you make any cat drawings/paintings (or whatever other art you do) he might ask for one
• If you give him one he will place it wherever there is space in his room
Asmodius
• He is not nervous or surprised in the slightest
• He will tease you for staring at him
• Once he finds out you are using him as a reference he will start posing for you even if you didn't ask him to.
• If you ask him to hold still and stop posing so much, he will pout and whine about it for a little but he will listen and hold still
• One way or another one of the paintings/drawings of him will be his and he will show it off
• He might have some critics if you "Didn't make him pretty enough" then again you would have to be the best artist in the world to make him look pretty enough
• Dont worry he still loves it
Beelzebub
(I dont know much about Beel so please excuse me if i get his personality wrong)
• He probably doesn't care if you are staring. He might get curious why after a while
• You would probably have to show him the drawing/painting because i dont see him asking unless he looks over your shoulder while you are drawing
• He is very supportive and loves your art
Belphegor
• He was a little irritated because you staring at him was making it hard for him to sleep
• He would ask why you were staring at him so intensely
• After you tell him he is like "okay" then trys to go back to sleep
• When it becomes a common occurrence he would wake up to you making an artwork and tiredly ask to see it.
• Sometimes it's a trap though and he pulls you onto the couch so you will take a nap with him
Barbatos
• He would calmly ask you why you were staring at him. He wouldn't be phased at all. He is asking as if he was asking you what the time is
• A simple explanation is enough for him
• Definitely wants to see the finished product almost every time
• Dont. Draw. Rats. I have warned you
• He will remind you to do your work instead of working on your art
• Will keep all of the art you give him.... EXCEPT FOR RATS! I TOLD YOU DONT GIVE HIM RAT STUFF! ARE YOU TRYING TO DIE?
• If you ask for help or critique he will give some really helpful advice and on point critique
Diavolo
• Any and every excuse to get out of work. He isn't concerned or anxious about you staring. He sees it as an opportunity to not do paperwork.
• Is VERY interested in your art. And not just because it gets him away from the work. He is also genuinely curious and wants to learn more
• I can see him just grabbing the piece you were working on and admiring it.
• You want him to pose? Sure! He would be more then happy to
• He is disappointed when Barbatos drags him away so he can finish his work
A/N: I hope you enjoyed and sorry for Beelzebub's being so short. For some reason i have a harder time writing about him. And sorry for no Solomon... at first i forgot he existed then i drew a blank when i tried to write him so....
#anime#fanfic#headcanon#headcannons#beelzebub obey me#satan obey me#lucifer obey me#leviathan obey me#mammon obey me#obey me x reader#obey me#obey me x mc#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#barbatos obey me#diavolo obey me#lucifer x mc#mammon x mc#leviathan x mc#satan x mc#asmodius x mc#beelzebub x mc#belphegor x mc#diavolo x mc#barbatos x mc
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Literally loving ur writing so far Bestie 🥺💙would I be able to req how the batboy would react to a fwb/situationship vibe with reader? Like they have feelings but reader is scared of commitment
Thank youuu! Im gonna be really honest, I don't think a lot of the batboys would be okay with a situationship sort of deal.. and I don't write romantic damian( at least not yet) .
Batboys x reader- Situationship headcanons
Dick grayson-
I can see a teammate or someone he works close with as a detective turns into a night of passion and now both of them cant go back to normal situation .
He says he is okay with it, and prolly keeps up that act for 4-5 months?
I think you would end the situationship. Dick is a really sought-after guy and one night he Is just upset with you about something. So when another girl flirts with him rather than his usual " I'm sorry there's someone else I'm into" line he flirts back. You see red
you either walk away angry/upset or pull him away. He follows you to an alley or a secluded area of the party.
"why are you even upset, you are the one who doesn't want us to be official?" "well that's not because I don't want you, that's because I'm scared of intimacy"
He would be really understanding once you explain your issues and fear of commitment. You guys come up with a better set of guidelines for your arrangement and he sticks to it.
if you want an open relationship, he is down. if you want to be exclusive but not yet in a relationship relationship he would be okay.
But dick does want to get married someday and have kids. So this arrangement wont last for long. he will try his hardest to help you overcome that fear of commitment but if you cant then its gonna end someday. And he makes that clear to you from the start. all cards are on the table always and communication is key and he makes sure no one gets hurt( or at least tries avoiding it as much as he can)
Jason todd
wont do it
maybe a bestfriend turned situationship scenario
you are his sanctuary , his home a safe place to come back to. and after everything he has been through he struggles with so many insecurities and he deserves a domestic life.
the moment he sees you with another guy, even if it just flirting, he is out the door. He already believes no one loves him and now you don't even want to commit to him? is he not enough?
he gets that you have issues and no one understands issues better than him. But he is in so much pain already that its best for the both of you to not get together at all.
even the fact that you from the very start didn't want to commit makes him get all in his head and even if you get ready to commit later on , he wont be able to forget that fact and will keep thinking you'll leave him or he isn't the one
he also reads a lot of classic literature and romance in books is what he wants. the concept of a situationship doesn't make sense to him and he just needs some good old domestic loving.
Tim drake
best at it
you guys are young, he is so busy. he is totally cool with a teenage dirtbagy relationship
lets meet under the bridge , get high and makeout type of shit,
Partners in crime / bestfriends that hookup
he loves it, its perfect for him
there are no expectations no responsibilities, you guys are just what the other needs . no stupid anniversaries and big fancy dinners
tim gives very "eat the rich" vibes so this situationship is another way for him to be a little rebellious .
Very very teenage dirtbag- going to grocery shops at 2am and sitting on the dirty floor trying all 20 types of slushies
spray painting the really big asshole companies buildings, going to huge rallies without having any idea what you are rallying for.
stealing the batmobile and then crashing it
the adrenaline makes you hot and bothered and it leads to more. and once its over you go to a shady Chinese place and tip 200 on a 40 dollar meal.
he gets you, you get him and you don't need labels to show your love to each other. and who needs someone else when you have everything you could want within each other? and then someday when you're ready and if you are ready, you can always make it official. its all up to you two , fuck the labels
#Tim Drake x Reader#Tim Drake x You#Tim Drake x Y/N#Tim Drake Fluff#Tim Drake Angst#Tim Drake Comfort#Tim Drake Headcanons#Tim Drake Imagines#Red Robin x Reader#Red Robin x You#Red Robin x Y/N#Batfamily#Batfamily x Reader#Batfamily Fluff#Batfamily x You#Batfamily x Y/N#Batfamily Headcanons#Batfamily Imagines#Batboys#Batboys x Reader#Batboys Fluff#Batboys Headcanons#Batboys Imagines#Jason Todd + Red Hood#Jason Todd x Reader#Jason Todd x You#Jason Todd x Y/N#Jason Todd Fluff#Jason Todd Angst#Jason Todd Comfort
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milevens are insane
warning now - i get extremely heated in this so if you're going to tell me to calm down leave. before any of you weird bitches tell me to go do something more productive or to touch grass- no. i'm fifteen, it's summer, and i'm a highly involved high school student. i'm not here because i have nothing better to do, i'm here because i understand good writing and am able to have hobbies ❤️
anyways
was on the mileven endgame hashtag just now and because i don't choose violence i wont be addressing any of them directly, but i will be addressing some of the ridiculous bullshit on there. term bullshit used intentionally
the love confession came as a result of mike "gaining the confidence" to tell el how much he loves her because he was afraid that he loved her more than she loved him.
are you listening to the words that are coming out of your mouth right now? i want to sit down and get a coffee with you and dissect what the fuck you meant by that. sure, right, yeah, he gained so much PRODUCTIVE confidence from his conversation he had with will where will was using eleven to mask his own feelings for mike. it makes so much sense narratively that this end all be all mileven event is sparked from will's feelings and not mikes! sure! right! this is such an idiotic piece of reasoning. you are literally saying that you are okay with your endgame ship only being endgame based on faulty communication and lies. are you joking? "you just gotta improve your motivation" ass piece of evidence
also, mike being insecure about loving her more than she loves him is complete, total, utter bullshit. el frequently expresses her love to mike via letters and youre here to say that mike would have any problem with doing the same thing if he were insecure about her love for him? that literally makes no sense. i wouldn't be afraid of loving somebody more than they love me if they are actively putting more effort into insuring me that they love me than i am to them. like, what does that even mean?
“Will Byers is a pathetic loser annoying character and contributed little to the plot of ST. "
yes that is a direct quote. no i'm not kidding.
what kind of fucking neanderthal watches stranger fucking things- a show about a kid who disappears- and thinks the kid who disappears isn't a central part of the narrative? the first episode of the goddamn show is called "the vanishing of will byers"! maybe this is hard for you and your confused brain to get your head around, but el and mike met when mike was out looking FOR WILL. mike and el are still together because mike gained courage from WILL'S LOVE FOR HIM. what a fucking idiot you must be. i would try to explain to you the myriad of other reasons why will is absolutely central to the plot of the show, but since the show itself has clearly gone in one ear and out the other, i probably wont be able to get through to you either.
“what if we learned to cope with world that doesn’t accept us as individuals by embracing each other completely?” said about mileven
um.. what. that's literally byler. closeted gay guys in the 80s. but sure, the ones that aren't being accepted are the two white and allegedly heterosexual individuals. the "world that doesn't accept us" in question is a few high school bullies in comparison with the stigmatization, violence, and ostracization that has longstanding been a part of what it means to be queer. be so serious right now. mileven is not important for being non conformist, the GAY SHIP IN THE 80S IS!!
“The only people who queerbaited, was byler fans themselves lmao.”
even if we're ignoring the horrible grammar there are still SO many things wrong with everything that was just said. what they're saying above for anybody who can't decipher the weird medieval english code this person is using is that bylers actively queerbaited themselves which inherently makes no sense at all.
below i have included the oxford dictionary definition of queerbaiting: "the incorporation of apparently gay characters or same-sex relationships into a film, television show, etc. as a means of appealing to gay and bisexual audiences while maintaining ambiguity about the characters' sexuality."
how is it possible that byler shippers themselves are the ones doing the queerbaiting? are we running the show? nope! before you come on and post something as offensive as this- which i will get into- at least make sure you know what you're saying. xoxo
to insinuate for even a second that mike wheeler not being gay would be anything other than deliberate queerbaiting is insane. there is something wrong with you. aside from the parts of the show where his queerness is deliberately alluded to like music, costuming, analogies, allegories, and set design, netflix has been, weather you like it or not, actively marketing in favor of byler and mike not being straight. all below come from official netflix accounts-
how is this not queerbaiting? genuinely what are you on about. this is literally textbook.
“will is fruity but mike didn't like the fruit on his pizza”
you seriously are basing your argument about mike not being gay on him not liking fruit on pizza? you seriously think that some of the most commended and celebrated writers of the last decade would use symbolism involving a word that can literally be interpreted as a slur when their show has two characters who are canonically a part of the group affected said slur? are you fucking stupid? that was harmless banter used to communicate the differences in habitual action across the country. it wasn't the duffers trying to do for you what they do for us in deliberate, straightforward NON-OFFENSIVE symbolism.
i saw somebody claim that mike's character arc in season four was inherently about not believing in his self worth nor in his competency to be in a relationship with el
while i do for the most part agree with you, i'm going to ask you a question- mike was never anxious about his identity and self worth involving el before season four. why do you think that just came up now if not for the fact that he's been having insecurities involving his sexuality and romantic attraction to women as a whole? in my opinion, mike realized that he might not like girls in that way circa the end of season three- a realization that only festered and grew through the absence of not only the boy he loves that is causing this insecurity but the girl whom he is using as a way to say hey, i can't be gay, i have a girlfriend! mike was clearly going through some serious emotional struggles as we can immediately see in this scene with how suddenly awkward he is with will and the immediate emphasis that's put on the "from mike" on the flowers.
i agree that his season four and part of his season five arc are about his feelings of insecurity about being in a relationship with el, however, i don't think he's insecure because he thinks she's better than him in the sense that she's some superhero, i think he thinks she's better than him because he knows that he'll never be able to love her the way she deserves to be loved. he's not going to outright come and say to will that he doesn't think that he can love her in the way she deserves to be loved. he's closeted. what he says in the van scene is the only way he knows to express his feelings. it's very similar to what will does in the same scene. it makes no sense for this insecurity to randomly manifest in him if it wasn't for an external factor that doesn't involve el, because nothing has really changed with the dynamic of their relationship other than the move. one could argue that mike is feeling insecure over el's supposed popularity she claims to have in her letters, but mike's arc has never been about caring about popularity in school. that's not something on his mind so much as the grand scheme of the world is. lets not forget that he joins hellfire in season four.
“When Mike didn’t say “I love you”, By*ers twisted it to their narrative. When Mike did say “I love you”, By*ers twisted it to their narrative.”
you literally sound like trump going on about the democrats. listen to what your saying right now. also, it's a ship name. there's no need to censor it you fucking weirdo.
wasted time building up mileven
i'm sorry, what build up? i'm confused. there's no "build up". THIS is build up:
above is will, possessed by a monster who feeds off of those lacking love in their lives, only being able to be broken out of possession by a heartfelt monologue by the PERSON HE LOVES detailing how the best decision he ever made was to befriend him.
above is will claiming he will never fall in love, then his love for one of the other main characters becomes a central plot point of the two seasons to come. joyce and i see through will and all of you weird milevens
mike telling will how it's not his fault will doesn't like girls only after he loses the person he's been using to cover up his own insecurity about the same thing- not liking girls. suspicious.
will's LOVE FOR MIKE being the thing to give him the confidence to help el SAVE THE WORLD, only episodes after we establish that mike is bound to be pissed that he was lied to. and theres no buildup? THERE'S REALLY NO BUILDUP?
if you don't see buildup i fear you are literally just a lost cause because it is so painfully obvious to anybody who made it past seventh grade english class that there is something deeper and more intimate than friendship going on between will byers and mike wheeler.
“Women can be independent while being in a relationship guys😭!!”
OBVIOUSLY! i am literally the biggest feminist on the entire western seaboard. i couldn't agree more with this, which is why we have arcs like nancy's where she actively becomes more independent while still maintaining a relationship with jonathan. the difference is that mike and el have been together since they were like thirteen. when el was immersed into the real world for the first time in season two she immediately leaned on mike for support in that. it's not that she can only be independent on her own, it's that mike is directly symbolic to her of a time when she was stumbling around the world with naivete and not quite knowing how to navigate that. by spreading her wings away from that relationship, it will not only give her independence, but also a way to see beyond the barriers of hawkins and a life where she was valued mostly for the qualities she brings to the supernatural equation. el's arc is one of my favorites. i would never claim such a thing and discredit the essence of what makes the emotions behind her character so interesting. she's somebody who was literally raised in a lab. she shouldn't be held back by somebody she is quite literally dependent on.
last but not least, i saw a post that said milevens always win.
"are you sure about that?" i ask, noah schnapp's most recent instagram post open on my phone, finn wolfhard's spotify playlist in my headphones, my mike holding will's painting funko on the desk in front of me, wearing a yellow shirt with a blue sweater over it.
thank u for listening to my ted talk 💙💛
#stranger things#byler#mike wheeler#will byers#byler nation#byler is endgame#stranger things 4#byler brainrot#stranger things 5#anti mileven#milkvan is bones#i hate mileven#el hopper
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Stray Kids with an S/O who is a huge horror movie fan
pairing: ot8 x gn!reader
genre: fluff
disclaimer: this is as always just my opinion :)
a/n: as a huge horror movie fan myself, I had to write this! enjoy!🩷
Chan:
As he said before, it's not like he's scared of horror movies, he just doesn't think they're interesting to watch. But, you're interesting to him and he loves you so he will definitely try for you. He also thinks he won't get scared cause 'nothing scares him' but oh boy was he wrong. You have to promise him extra cuddles because he's not gonna be able to fall asleep that night. Will also try to dissect the plot with you after the movie, and try to find meaning in the story just so it's less scary to him.
If he was never really invested into the horror genre, you could show him the classics like The Shining(1980), The Omen(1976), The Amityville Horror (1979), Psycho(1960) and then also some newer iconic movies like Get Out(2017), The Ring(2002), Sinister(2012), Hereditary(2018) and The Conjuring(2013).
Minho:
Loves it. Loves to try and scare you while you're watching a movie together. At first, you're so happy that you can share your love for horror with your significant other. And you know he really doesn't like jumpscares, so you try to find movies that don't have many of those. But if they do and Minho predicts a jumpscare, he'll grab you at the same time it's happening, making you jump out of your skin even though you saw the movie already. You kinda start regretting watching horror movies with him because he annoys you on purpose. He thinks you're so adorable when you're mad at him, but he wont push too far and he'll always make it up with cuddles and kisses later. Overall, 10/10 experience.
I feel like he'd watch almost any horror movie cause he's a curious cat (hehe) and you'd both share your favorites.
I don't know why, but I also feel like Minho would appreciate good old silent horror movies. I just think if he's a horror fan he may enjoy seeing the roots of horror. Like The Cabinet Of Dr. Caligari(1920), Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde(1920), The Phantom Carriage(1921), Nosferatu(1922) and Häxan(1922).
Changbin:
I don't think he's too scared of them but I think he doesn't really care for them too much? Though, if you have some interesting thriller or detective movies to recommend he will definitely wanna watch them with you. I think Changbin likes a movie that has an intelligent story with a plot twist. He likes to guess what's gonna happen next and when he's actually right he'll be so happy and proud. He'll keep talking about how he guessed the plot and how smart he is and how you have to give him extra cuddles now. Either way, you're cuddling and snacking the whole time while watching and it's just nice and cozy.
I think he'd enjoy thrillers like The Game(1997), Fracture(2007), The Machinist(2004), The Double(2013), Shutter Island(2010), Zodiac(2007) and 1408(2007).
Hyunjin:
Miss him with that shit cause he ain't watching it unless you manage to coax him into it. It's gonna take a lot of persuading until he finally gives in but you have to be careful in choosing the right movie for Hyunjin. He doesn't like loud noises and he doesn't really like to feel scared. He'd rather watch something for the story, especially if it's an emotional one, and he also likes character driven stories.
I think he could watch artsy or slow creepy movies that are more drama-like but have elements of horror like Pan's Labyrinth(2006), Dark Water(2005), Windchill(2007), It Follows(2014), The Eyes Of My Mother(2016), I'm Thinking Of Ending Things(2020) and Case 39(2009).
Jisung:
Okay, with this one you can go crazy. Any weird horror movie, anything kinda disturbing, deranged or unhinged will be right up his ally. As a horror and anime fan himself, he's seen some pretty weird stuff so experiment, I guess. I also feel like he'd like fun horror movies, idk how to explain but ones that are disturbing but fun at the same time, like you can't look away even though you're looking at a train wreck.
Movies like Funny Games(2007), The Ruins(2008), Suspiria(1977), The Perfection(2018), Perfect Blue(1997), May(2002), Audition(2000), Saw franchise and Terrifier series would be fun for him. Also, since he mentioned Paranormal Activity, found footage horror movies would be fun to watch with Jisung too like Creep(2014), REC(2007), Unfriended(2015) and Cloverfield(2008).
Felix:
This is just not happening unless you can bribe him with cookies, gummies or any other sweets and ofcourse many cuddles and kisses, even more than you share usually. You'll have to practically beg him to watch a horror movie with you or make some kind of compromise that you'll participate in some activity he likes more than you later. He's not gonna sleep all night if you make him watch anything too scary, actually he wouldn't even be watching that. He'd probably be hidden in your neck the whole time and even the creepy sounds coming from the tv will give him nightmares.
The only way to make him watch horror movies is if they're mixed with comedy or they're so bad that they're funny. Like the Scream franchise, The Cabin In The Woods(2011), What We Do In The Shadows(2014), The Happening(2008), Tucker & Dale vs. Evil(2010), Housebound(2014) and ofcourse zombie comedies like One Cut Of The Dead(2017) and Shaun Of The Dead(2004).
Seungmin:
Kind of indifferent towards the scares but I think he gets annoyed with plot holes and characters acting stupid. Rolls his eyes at every over used trope or cliche sentence. You actually end up laughing while watching horror movies with him because he's too cute when he's annoyed.
"How is this killer still alive? He's been run over by a truck ten times, this is stupid!" or "Okay but why is he going towards the sound? Is he that dumb, he's gonna die!"
He does like dry humor though so he'd like some black comedy movies with horror elements like American Psycho(2000), Parasite(2019), The Lobster(2015), The Menu(2022) but also if you want to annoy him on purpose (because he's cute when he gets worked up) show him slashers like the Halloween franchise, Friday the 13th franchise and Black Christmas(2019).
Jeongin:
With Jeongin, I feel like it can go either way and it definitely depends on the theme of the movie. Also, he will probably try to act brave in front of you (until he jumps at a loud sound and then gets embarassed). For some reason I don't have an exact subgenre of horror for him but for some reason I feel like he'd like newer horror movies like Us(2019), Nope(2022), Last Night In Soho(2021), His House(2020), Host(2020), The Invisible Man(2020) and Fear Street film series.
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fizzy pop
– yn has a habit of bottling up their emotions, chan comforts them & explains the importance of communicating about feelings/emotions.
pairing | bang chan x gender neutral reader
genre | angst w comfort – 18+ is strongly advised!
cw | established relationship, mental health (low moods, low/no motivation, lose of interest in hobbies/things), pet names.
words | 2k ~ ( 2,042 )
notes | idk why but i've been putting off on posting this for months, maybe bc im nervous 🤔 don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. i hope you all enjoy! ‹3
m.list — wips list — you can also read it on my ao3
dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!
it's just another day. another day of just being there. another day of feeling like you have no purpose in life except to please others. another day of wondering “what is the purpose of me being here?” you fake smiles, say you're "ok" because saying how you actually feel is exhausting.
aside from it feeling exhausting, you also don't want to draw attention to yourself and when you do speak, you feel stupid for doing so, so you keep it all in, bottle it up until it's too much for you to handle. some days you wonder why you even bother to get out off bed.
is it because of the birds you hear outside? the sun's heat that you want to feel on your skin? could it be the laughter and chitter chatter of others? or maybe you want to hear the rain on the leaves–who knows. all you know is that everyday is the same and it's tiring.
the days merge into one. what day is it even? monday? tuesday? oh wait, it's saturday morning. time doesn't exist anymore. in your mind you see no point in getting up out of bed because again, what's the point?
so why is it that your boyfriend is gently shaking you, asking, no, begging you to get up.
“darlin'. please get up.” chan whispers as he gently shakes you by the shoulders. you sigh deeply, a tired sigh that causes chan to swallow and his suspicions to come to light.
you pull the duvet over your head, body curled in a small and fragile ball. the curtains are still drawn providing darkness despite the morning rays that wish to peak inside.
chan has been up since the crack of dawn. he has showered, made breakfast and managed to get dressed. he gave you some extra time to sleep in because he knows you're not a morning person but when the number nine on his watch turned to twelve and you're still not up and out, does he grow concerned.
he's had his suspicions for a while. he's noticed how defeated you sound. how there is little to no energy in the words you speak. he's tried everything to cheer you up, thinking, hoping you were just having an off day. but that off day turned into an off week which slowly, but surely, turned into an off month.
you lost your passion for being creative, lost the will to make anything which you despise. being creative is one of the many pleasures you have in life, to be able to make something and share your creations with others is exhilarating but when you feel like this, your mood turns bitter and cold towards everything you do which results in you resenting everything you create.
you lost the energy to speak to people. to pick up the phone and just talk. you're not deliberately ignoring nor trying to be difficult but keeping conversations flowing is just too hard right now and when you think they're giving you the same energy back do you feel so guilty.
what have i done to deserve this? why am i forced to feel like this. you find yourself questioning everything late at night. your head loud as soon as it hits the pillow and no amount of music you blast down your ears can silence those thoughts.
everything is so exhausting. everything is the same. you just want to disappear whether that be for a few days or forever, you're not quite sure, but certain people around you wont allow that to happen. they are keeping you afloat, head above water. you desperately and silently wish they never let you go, no matter how hard you fight and push them away.
“baby, please.” chan's words dripped with desperation. his knees on the bed behind you as he kneels causing the mattress to dip. his hands on your shoulders gently as his eyes bore into the duvet, burning holes into it until he is burning holes into you. tears threaten to spill down his soft cheeks as he becomes increasingly worried for you.
“chan..“ you whisper, your words shaking. “please.. leave me alone.”
he swallows. those three last words he hates to hear. now he is left in a difficult position. should he do as you say and leave you? leave you to fester and rot in your own thoughts and feelings. watch you melt into the mattress and become nothing but a lifeless shell. or should he force himself, force you to acknowledge him. show you, tell you that's it's going to be ok–even if you don't believe him in the beginning.
but this is chan and you know more than anyone how stubborn chan can be.
“lets go take a shower yn, together! and maybe we can go out and get lunch at that café you love so much?”
silence.
“or how about we go to that art shop! pick up those water colours you've been eyeing up for months?”
silence.
“ok well, what about some new cloth–”
“chan please!” you snap, causing him to jump. “what part of leave me alone don't you understand?!”
you don't mean to sound harsh and you hope chan doesn't take it to heart. the last thing you want is to hurt the one person you adore so much. luckily, chan knows you don't mean it but it doesn't hurt him any less.
“all of it.” he softly speaks. you feel the weight being lifted up off the mattress and footsteps against the wood flooring before the bedroom door squeaks open at the hinges.
your heart breaks. hot angry tears finally being set free and rolling down the bridge of your nose and cheeks, soaking into the material of your pillow. you sob, curling up into a ball even more as your heart aches in your chest. you grip onto the pillow as you silently cry out for chan, thinking he has completely left you alone.
but you did ask for it so why do you feel so guilty?
the duvet gets pulled back from you, the cold air hitting your hot and sweaty skin. the mattress dips once again as an arm snakes over your midriff. chest being pressed against your back as chan spoons you.
“don't cry, darlin'. i'm here, your channie is here.” his soft words provide you with a sense of comfort and an indescribable feeling of warmth as well as relief. his hand strokes your soft stomach, his lips kissing your neck so tenderly you worry that he isn't really there.
“c-chan…” you sob through your words as a way of confirmation. you can't breathe, the pain of everything that's built up over the past months is making it impossible for you to breathe. your mind fogs over as your chest heaves up and down.
you struggle to take breaths as tears stream down your face. your pillow becomes soaked with your tears. chan strokes your unwashed hair gently, hushing you and singing softly to help ground you.
“sh sh sh. you're ok, you're safe.” he whispers.
“sorry! i'm sorry!” you repeat over and over again in your fits of tears. chan continues to hush you, noticing that it's not working so he gently rolls you over to face him and pulls you into his naked chest.
the warmth and softness of his skin calms you down in an instant. his natural scent hugs your nostrils and sinks into your heart, soothing your heartbeat as well as your mind. you grip onto him, desperately trying to cling onto something before resulting in wrapping your arms around him tightly.
he gives you a bear hug. arms around your shoulders gently, fingers raking and massaging your scalp. his chest wet with tears as he continues to hush you through your episode.
there isn't much he can do when you're crying like this except wait. wait for it to pass–and it does, fifteen minutes later.
“better?” he gently asks. you peer up at him to notice that his own cheeks are wet with a few tears slowly falling.
“you're crying..” you whisper as you reach up and wipe the tears away. chan laughs softly before leaning into your touch. “why?”
“because it pains me to see you like this, my love.” that guilt comes back, settling in your stomach and wrapping itself around your heart, like black fog. you look down, tears falling from your lower lash line.
“sorry..” you mumble.
“hey.” chan unwraps his arms from you to gently lift up your head. “it hurts because i can't do anything about it. it hurts because i love you! seeing you in so much pain is rough darling. and it's not physical pain either, it's not like i can put a band aid on your wound.”
“i'm sorry i'm like this, chan. sorry i'm so difficult and such a disappointment.”
“oi.” his tone of voice turns stern which causes you to look up at him. his brows furrowed together as he reaches and strokes your cheek. “you're not a disappointment or difficult baby. it's ok to feel like this, to have off days and feel like nothing is right, however, you have to come to me when you feel like this! or if you can't come to me, talk to a friend.”
“but i hate talking about my feelings, chan.. i feel like a burden and that it just bores people and when i do confined in people, it feels like i don't get the comfort i expect to get so i'm left thinking if it's worth it and if i just expect too much from people.”
“what have i told you about bottling things up, mhm?”
“that it's just going to keep building and building until i explode.” you mumble to which chan hums and nods too
“imagine you're a bottle of fizzy pop. your body is the bottle, your feelings are the fizzy liquid. what happens when you shake a bottle of fizzy pop?”
“it bubbles and explodes, creating a huge mess.”
“and what happens when you bottle your feelings up?”
“i get shaken up by the smallest of things, which causes me to bubble and explode..”
“mhm. you have to remember, my darling, that how you feel is valid. your feelings are valid. you might seem like it's something so small or stupid, but that something small could build and build and build.”
“so i should come to you whenever i feel negative?”
“yes.”
“even if i'm frustrated at a piece of work? even if i can't get a recipe right and it annoys me?”
“yes.”
“but that is so small and not as important..”
“yn, if it's bothering you then it's big. if it's bothering you, it's important to me. if you feel angry, upset, energy less, i beg that you come to me or to a friend! it's important that we voice these things, let it be known because you'll feel better.” he tucks your hair behind your ear gently before you nuzzle into his chest, thinking about what he's saying.
he is correct. he always is and that's the thing that sometimes bothers you, but in a good way! it just means that you can't hide anything from chan, whether it's good or bad and when you are feeling down, chan is always there to pick you back up and dust you off, providing you with love and comfort.
“shall we go shower together to start the day?”
“isnt it a bit late for that? besides, hasn't your day already started?” you mumble against his chest.
“it's never too late to start the day and besides, i don't mind ‘restarting’ my day if it means i get to do it with you.” he kisses the top of your head gently, stroking your back as you tangle your legs with his.
“soon.”
“soon?” he questions.
“i just want to spend some more minutes with you..”
“we can spend as many minutes together as you like, my darling. as long as you're happy and content.”
“i'm always happy and content with you, chan. you're my safe space.”
“and i hope i continue to be and provide you with that safe space, yn.”
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