#but kai's been getting the short end of the stick for YEARS

[nickelwick]

The fact I legit SCREAMED when I saw this in the teaser

like please, please let this be a sign that these two will interact more as the amazing siblings they are

[https-florals]

daydreamin' and i'm thinking of you - j.m.

summary: jj returns from a day of surfing and devotes his night to you and a lil bit of weed.

word count: 2.3k

warnings: smoking weed, a lil suggestive, but mostly super fluffy and full of sweetness

author's note: back from the dead pookies!!! i just wanna say how incredibly grateful that none of yall have come for my wishy-washy ass! this year has been vcery hectic and rough, and i am so thankful y'all have let me be MIA. here's this little blurb smooch ily (i was too scared to flesh out the smut at the end IM SORRY ITS BEEN A WHILE)

JJ smells like a perfect, heady blend of sunscreen and salt when he and the boys get back from surfing. You’re waiting on the porch like a little 1950’s wife, and he runs up and hugs you as soon as he gets out of the Twinkie, acting like its been months since he’s seen you instead of a few hours.

“J!” You’re giggling as he swings you around, smacking loud kisses all over your face and neck. 

“Missed ya, pretty girl,” he murmurs into your neck.

John B slaps JJ’s back, surprising him so he lets go of you. “You literally just saw each other.” 

JJ’s jaw drops, hand over his heart like he’s been deeply wounded. “You’re just mad your woman isn’t out here to greet you,” he counters, squeezing your side and giving John B a sympathetic look.

“Wrong!’ Sarah says as she pushes open the screen door, giving her boyfriend an enthusiastic kiss on the cheek. 

John B grins back at JJ, and follows Sarah back inside. 

“You still up for that boat date later?” you ask, fingers intertwining with his.

You swear his eyes sparkle. “Um, duh!” 

A few hours later, the sun is sinking into the horizon, sky turning the prettiest pink and orange. You are toting a basket full of picnic supplies: a tupperware full of elote salad, another with some grilled chicken, a speaker, and of course, a little cellophane baggie and some rolling papers. JJ’s job is to carry the fishing poles and bait (raw hot-dogs because why would he spend money on crickets when there’s hot dogs in the fridge?), and the six-pack of mini Dr. Peppers you’ll split (JJ will inevitably drink two of your three). 

“Where are you going?” You hear someone call from inside the house, but both of you act like you can’t hear it. 

HMS Pogue is sitting pretty at the end of the dock, and you practically skip onto it. The rev of the engine is like the call of an old friend, thrumming through you, bare feet on the deck.

You sit cross legged at the bow while JJ drives, your hair flowing behind you. The spray of freshwater is perfectly refreshing. 

It’s dusk when the boat reaches a little secluded spot on the marsh, and JJ announces it. “Gorgeous,” he says, the sky purple above him. “And no one around for miles.” He plops next to you, sticking his nose in your neck and sighing. You’re sitting pretty in a bikini top and jean shorts, and he plays with the tie at your back.

You laugh and push him off, getting up to get your basket of food. He helps you unload it, mouthing a silent yes as he pulls out the sodas. Then comes the tupperware, and he sticks two spoons into the corn. “Cheers.” He holds his out.

You tap your spoon against his, and gasp in fake shock when he knocks the food of it.

“Gotta be ready, babe,” he deadpans, snatching up your bite after he eats his. “Danger is waiting at every turn.”

You shake your head and laugh, scooting the tupperware closer to yourself. “You’re so weird.”

“You love it,” He grins, and you can’t argue with that. 

After you eat, JJ pulls out the package of hotdogs and starts to prep the rods.

“There’s no way you can catch fish with those,” you question, wrinkling your nose at them. You frown, turning on the puppy-dog eyes. “Do we have to fish? I wanna smoke.”

He copies your expression and sticks his bottom lip out. “Poor bunny,” he mocks, but shoves your fishing pole in your hand all the same. “Catch a fish, I’ll roll you a joint, ‘kay?”

You sigh. “ ‘Kay,” 

He grins and plants a kiss on your forehead. “You got it, babe.” He gives you a chunk of hotdog and you slip it onto the hook. JJ comes up behind you to guide your cast and you let him, his breath warm on the back of your neck. There’s the whir of the line, and the satisfying plop of the bobber in the water. 

“Now, we wait.” He takes the rod from you and drops it into the holder, and works on casting his own line. 

You’re bored before he even puts his down. “I have to catch a fish before we smoke?”

“Yeah, crybaby.” The two of you sit on the bow, feet dangling over the water. His ankle knocks against yours.

You let out another dramatic sigh, but you let your head fall onto his shoulder. “This is the worst part. I hate waiting.”

JJ laughs. “Yeah, honey. I am well aware.” He pokes your side, and you yelp dramatically. Reaching over you, he pulls the speaker out of your basket, and turns it on. You watch as he connects to it and goes through his spotify, thumb skimming over the screen as he looks through his playlists. JJ clicks on one of your collaborative playlists, titled “songs for slow dancing.”

He stands up, reaching out to pull you up as the hauntingly pretty piano intro for Aretha Franklin’s Daydreaming begins to play. “Wanna kill some time?”

You smile, and let him pull you into him. You think you could slow dance with him until you dropped dead, until you collapsed into each other and turned into intertwined fossils. Maybe that kind of thing is a little too poetic for the two of you, but you don’t really care. He starts to sing along, and you press your ear to his chest to hear his voice thrum through his chest.

daydreaming and i’m thinking of you, daydreaming and i’m thinking of you…

One of his hands splays on the small of your back, fingertips sneaked under the waist of your shorts, callused and all too soft. The other one is holding yours as you sway back and forth to the beat.He twirls you out fast, and back into his grip, your back to his chest as he squeezes you.

No one would ever know it, but JJ absolutely loves to dance. A little after you started dating, you dragged him to some swing dancing classes at the community center, and expected plenty of pushback, but you were met with absolutely none. The two of you fell in love stepping on each others toes and falling all over each other. It’s always a fun party trick to pull out at the fancier parties. He’s always wanting to dance with you, whether it’s learning how to shag in the living room late at night, or spinning you around on the boat.

He stops you mid-step, asking, “Can we try the dirty-dancing jump?”

The dirty-dancing jump has only been successfully executed by the two of you once. All other times have ended in someone being injured (usually JJ). Your jaw drops open, and you lightly shove him. “Absolutely not! You wanna fall off the boat?”

He gives you the biggest eyeroll, but immediately switches to puppy dog eyes when you cross your arms. “Just like, a lift? Pleaseeeee,” he drags out, taking your hands and acting like he’s going limp. 

“Fine! But if you drop me in this water, I’m actually going to have serious beef with you, Maybank.”

He laughs, maybe an itty-bit manaically, and grabs your waist. “Okay, I’m gonna count you off, and you’ll jump, ‘kay? So, one, two, three-”

You hear your fishing rod rattle in its holder and jump away from him. “My line!” Scrambling after it, you grab the pole right as it looks like it’s going to leap out of its holster.

“Get it babe!” JJ practically shouts, darting behind you and placing his arms around yours to give you a little support. 

The whir of the line rushing out makes you jump, and you hurry to start reeling it back in, furiously turning the handle. JJ’s mouth is by your ear as you lean into him and he talks you up as you fight the fish. “Come on, baby, you got it. Keep going, keep going, you almost got it!”

He’s pulling half the weight, you know that, but you don’t mind the help when you can watch the cords in his forearms tense and pull.

Finally, the line leaps out of the water, and soon a big scaly body is flopping on the deck of the boat. “Atta girl!” JJ shouts as you snatch it up by the lure, holding it up proudly. It’s pretty heavy, probably a little over 14 pounds. 

“Look at that, baby! Got yourself a bluefish.” JJ is smiling so proudly as he fishes out his phone, and makes you pose for a picture like one of those Tinder frat guys. The flash is harsh and you know you look crazy, but he grins at the picture all the same.

“Can you throw him back in? He’s too pretty to eat,” you ask as he messes with something on his phone. You’re still holding the fish as you try to lean over and see what he’s doing.

“Here, yeah.” He drops his phone on the boat deck and takes the fish from you to fling back in. When you look at his phone, you see your face staring back up at you from his lockscreen. It was some picture of the two of you from a party, but now it’s you and your fish. He immediately changed his wallpaper after he took the picture. In your opinion, it’s definitely not a knockout photo, but you almost tear up at the sweetness of it.  

“You looked cute,” JJ shrugs, seeing you looking at it. 

You just smile, shaking your head, and lean against him. “Can we get high now?”

“Damn, you waste no time, huh?”

Soon, your fishing rods forgotten, you’re watching JJ roll you a joint to share. His fingers dance along the rolling paper, tucking and smoothing all gentle. He’s mesmerizing. When his tongue darts out to wet the paper, you swear you start salivating.

He catches you staring, hitting you with that heartbreaker grin again. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“Shut up and light up,” you sigh, reaching for the blunt in his hands. 

“Can’t light up if you don’t hand me my lighter,” JJ frowns, expression sarcastic. He puts his hand out, waiting.

You reach into your basket and pull it out, smiling when you see it. A few months ago, you had decided to buy JJ a custom lighter. You got him one off Etsy, a cheap Bic lighter with your face printed on the plastic. Of course, the image didn’t translate correctly, so the picture is heavily distorted, your smile big and wide and eyes even bigger. 

It’s probably his favorite possession. 

He lights the joint, letting it smoke for a second before raising it to his lips.

“Hey,” you whine, reaching for his hand. 

“So needy,” he chides, taking a hit, gripping you by your neck, and blowing the smoke into your open mouth. Your breath hitches as you try your best to inhale, try to not think about his lips just ghosting over yours, his calloused fingers hard on the sides of your neck.

“Good girl,” he exhales as you successfully breathe in without hacking up your lungs.

The frogs are peeping and the wind is slow and soft, pushing the smoke around the two of you and enveloping you in it. You’re talking mindlessly as the joint passes between you, staring at the way moonlight shines through JJ’s hair, turning it platinum. His irises catch the light just right- bright, icy blue. 

You’re sitting cross-legged, knees knocking with his. All you can think about his how much you love your boyfriend, even with the edges of your mind soft and your senses fuzzy. JJ takes your hand, pressing the pads of your fingertips against his. 

“It’s like I can feel your fingerprints,” he comments, fingertips lightly rubbing yours. He pulls your hand as he leans back, so you’re both on your back, looking at the stars.

“It’s so pretty,” you whisper in awe. With absolutely zero light pollution, the sky is a myriad of deep black and blue hues and so, so many stars. You’d decompose while trying to count them all. You snuggle up against J as he takes a final hit. From your perspective, the rising smoke almost looks like it’s weaving through the stars, netting around them and sparkling right above your head. JJ tosses the remnant of the joint into your grocery bag of trash. 

“C’mere,” he sighs, propping himself up and running a hand down your torso. When he kisses you, he tastes like smoke and sweat, and a wave of heat rushes through you just from the taste. You’re pulling him on top of you by the loops of his cargo shorts, pressing yourself against the firm plane of his abdomen.

“God, you’re needy,” he laughs, pinning your hips down with a heavy hand. 

“You made me this way,” you squirm, and it’s true. He’s too generous with his touches and too sugary with his words, and you chase him like he’s a hit of the purest cocaine. 

He shifts on top of you, a knee between your thighs just like you like it. He presses his knee up just to see you gasp and grind down on him. JJ’s laugh is a little mean as snaps the waistband of your shorts. “Okay, honey, what do you want?”

There’s no shame in your voice as you blurt out, “Fuck me.” You’re whining out a plea before he can even answer, with no care that you’re out in the open… no care that the cops patrol at night.

JJ fakes shock, but the hardness of him against you gives him away. “You wanna get fucked, huh. Out in the open?”

“Don’t act like this wasn’t your whole plan, smartass,” you counter as he pins your hands down right above your head. 

He just laughs in response. “Dirty, dirty, dirty,” he tuts rebukingly, but he’s pulling apart the tie of your swimsuit top all the same.

as always, likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated!!

[livwritesstuff]

Steve closed down his computer after his last therapy session of the day (it was a short day – it’s only three in the afternoon), and swiveled around in his chair to look out the window onto his backyard.

It’s nice out. He could go for a walk around the neighborhood or putter around the yard for a while –  probably one of the last opportunities before the fall weather starts to turn on them.

He knows he isn’t going to do either of those things though. Instead, he’s gonna sit around keeping one eye on his phone because he knows his oldest daughter Moe’s course schedule and he knows she’s about to be heading to her next class which means she’s probably going to be calling him just like she’d done two other times today.

Sure enough, only a few minutes later, Steve’s phone started to ring with a call from Moe.

“Hey,” he said as he answered the call.

“Hi Pop,” she replied, her voice coming through the phone a little crackly, broken up by the sound of wind and city traffic around her.

“You on your way to class?”

“Uh-huh. That chem for engineers course – Pop, you wouldn’t believe the shit that rats get up to in this city. It’s crazy. I literally just saw a massive one dragging a whole bag of those little…you know…the red cheese – well, the cheese isn’t red, it’s just–”

“Babybels,” Steve finishes for her.

“Yeah, those! Pop – an entire bag of Babybel cheese being dragged down the street by a rat," Moe exclaims before immediately heading down another tangent.

Two months into Moe’s freshman year of college, Steve thinks she might be a little bit lonely.

She’s always been independent (sometimes to a scary extent, if he’s honest) and she’d handled most of the transition like a champ, but that kind of independence has its ups and downs, and Moe’s never been all that great at the social stuff. Unlike her sisters, she hadn’t had a big group of friends in high school, just a few good ones that she’d made early on in school and stuck with until graduation.

Now, he thinks she might be having some trouble with the whole making new friends piece of moving to a brand new city (goddamn New York City, because these kids won’t let him see a second of peace, and even though he trusts Moe and knows she can take care of herself, Steve still isn’t really in a place yet where he can sleep easy knowing she’s out there on her own).

He knows that Moe will find her people just like he had done years ago. In the meantime, she's been fulfilling that human need for social interaction through lots of calls with him and Eddie (and he'd once even caught Moe and Robbie on a video call together, which he's pretty sure had never happened before).

Steve’s not gonna complain. He’d pretty much drop anything to talk to his kids.

After a few minutes, the background noise coming from Moe's side of the call fades away.

"Okay, I have to go," Moe says, "I might call you later."

"I'm around," Steve replies, because for her (for all his kids), he'll always be.

"'Kay. Love you Pop."

"I love you too."

He waits a beat for Moe to end the call and when she does, he gets up, sticks his phone in his back pocket so he'll know when it rings again, and goes on with his day.

[wangxianficrecs]

Rewind 2023 - Proud Author Spotlight

WangxianFicRecs - Rewind 2023

Here are some recommendations from 2023 sent in by our fandom's authors themselves. Make sure to give them much love. PS: Authors, don't be shy! Submit more Proud Author Spotlights!

~*~

I published my first MDZS fic this year.

It's a 60k time travel fix-it fic from the POV of several outsider characters who are all witnesses to Wei Wuxian's change in behaviour and the events following that change.

I tried really hard to stick to canon (novel-only) characterization and I'm really proud of what I wrote so don't hesitate to give it a try (it's complete too!) :D

We'll Build A Dynasty (one the heavens can't shake)

by One_eyed_God (@oneeyedoctogod)

T, 66k, Wangxian

Summary: Wei Wuxian is well-known as a trouble-maker, someone who likes jokes and chaos. He promptly proves this by disappearing without a trace from the Cloud Recesses, in the middle of the Lectures. But when war is on the horizon and tensions boil over, can his actions really be summarized as a simple prank? Or, the unbelievable story of Wei Wuxian, time traveller, told from everyone's point of view but his.

~*~

Hi there! I don’t know if anyone remembers, but I posted my first ever fic on Ao3 this year!

Jailbreaking

by CullenBlue (@cullen-blue23)

T, 21k, NHS & WN

Summary: During the Wen indoctrination, we see everyone escape during the fight with Xuanwu… except Huaisang, who had fainted earlier. So, in short… how TF did he escape?? The story of how Nie Huaisang broke out of Qishan, and the events that happened afterwards

~*~

Mod Kay himself here :D I published a fic this year where novel canon Lan Wangji transmigrates into the CQL-verse and saves post-canon Wei Wuxian, who struggles to keep himself alive during his lonely travels. It goes hard on the It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, but I promise there's a happy ending.

the roots

by thelastdboy (@thelastdboyy)

E, 30k, Wangxian

Summary: In one universe, Wei Wuxian had been left by the side of the road while Lan Wangji had become the Chief Cultivator. He found himself alone again, discarded and heartbroken. He also found himself to be a target again, as people started hunting the Yiling Laozu once more. He was all alone and just so fucking tired that he couldn't even bring himself to fight back. Some part of him yearned to return to the peaceful oblivion that had been death. In another universe, Lan Wangji's world fell apart in a single day. He was forced to bury not only his son, but his husband as well. Sizhui's Wen heritage had been discovered and Wei Wuxian's past had once again inspired animosity. While Sizhui would hopefully find peace at least, Wei Wuxian's soul had been destroyed and Lan Wangji would rather destroy his own soul than never be re-united with Wei Wuxian again. However, his late husband had left him one last gift: a path into a different universe. Or: MDZS!Lan Wangji transmigrates into the CQL-verse just in time to save post-canon CQL!Wei Wuxian. Together, they grieve and eventually, they find a home for themselves.

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for these hard-working authors if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)

[dragonfly0808]

Musa: The Thesis

Kay so… this one involves one of the biggest spoilers of s3 due to one of the biggest changes I made there revolves around Musa and I will be discussing it after the First Things First part. So please please please if you haven’t read up until Season 3 Chapter 24: The Space Between Where Our Ends Meet, DO NOT READ PAST THE FIRST THINGS FIRST PORTION OF THIS THESIS

I’M SERIOUS PLS DON’T

First Things First

The first words I have in Musa’s character sheet are small sassy goth.

One of the main things I focused on with Musa, especially in the first season is her struggle to be vulnerable. Musa has lived the past 5 or so years with a closed off dad and never got a real chance to truly mourn her mom due to her having to learn to pretty much take care of herself, because of this she becomes very defensive and doesn't trust many people, and it causes her to struggle with being vulnerable, making her feel weak to do so. Here we see her open up slowly to the girls and not really talk that much about her home life until s2.

This is also where the main problem in her relationship with Riven comes in, but we’ll talk about that later on.

Musa, along with Aisha was the loneliest Winx before going to Alfea, and this plays into how protective she can be over the girls, she knows what it’s like to have no one so she is more than ready to throw hands for her girls any day of the week.

Love’s a Loaded Gun, Nobody Wants to Fight

A theme we see with Musa is her not believing she’s really worth a lot of time. She worried about staying one place too long and becoming an inconvenience or sharing her hurt and becoming a weight.

We see that it really takes a lot for her to believe that she is not being selfish or ‘too much’ by expressing herself or deciding to stay in one place, namely Tecna’s home.

Musa has a lot of feelings regarding feeling like she’s being shut out.

She’s working on not shutting people out herself but when others do it to her, she could just have a breakdown since she is so sick and tired of her dad doing it to her and that’s just about the worst thing you could do to her.

She’s a tiny bit afraid of love. Not so much of love itself as just, the thought of losing someone she loves again.

Haunted

So… this is the part with the huge S3 spoiler so PLEASE TURN BACK NOW, THIS WAS ONE OF THE MOST IMPACTFUL MOMENTS OF S3 MY INBOX WAS FLOODED FOR A WEEK IF YOU HAVEN’T READ IT YET TURN BACK NOW

So, in s3 chapter 24 Musa gains her Enchantix… and kills Stormy in the process.

First off the second I decided to do s3 I knew I was gonna change how Musa got her Enchantix cause I think we can all agree she got the short end of the stick in the OG.

I also already had in mind killing off either Stormy or Darcy but Stormy just fit more.

I combined these two ideas by changing Musa’s Enchantix to be gained by taking down a building over herself and Stormy due to Stormy loosing control of a curse.

Now, this could’ve gone very differently so why did I chose Musa to be the one to kill Stormy?

Honestly? I felt like it would impact her the most.

Now, obvs any of the girls would’ve been hugely impacted by taking a life (see Tecna) but taking the life of one of the Trix who they’ve known and fought for so long is another level of personal.

And, just like Bloom, Musa can be a very angry person and she hated the Trix’s guts and maybe a tiny part of her would’ve been glad with them dead, but actually having a hand in it…

It creates very conflicting emotions and a mountain of trauma and feelings of inhumanity and just confusion for our girl which we will get to see a lot more of in s4.

Thoughts Behind her Main Relationships

Tecna

I love Tecna and Musa, they are very much a friendship between unconventional girls who don’t always come across as they mean to.

They both struggle to make friends for different reasons but the second they meet they realize that they are quite similar and so never push each other outside of their comfort zone at first and that’s what allows them to become close enough to then push one another.

Musa gets what makes Tecna tick and makes sure that she’s comfortable, she makes sure she gets her alone time and makes sure she doesn’t get overwhelmed.

Tecna gets that Musa doesn’t want to talk about herself so instead gets her to open up about her music.

And it’s through this that they start to trust one another and by s2 we see them knowing each other well enough to keep the other from spiraling.

When Tecna’s confused about her feelings for Timmy, it’s Musa who reminds her that it’s okay to not be ready for a relationship. And when Musa and Riven first kiss, it’s Tecna who suggests they take it slow since she knows how skittish they can both be.

At this point, they push one another when they need to.

They are crucial to each other’s growth.

Riven

I always loved the idea of Rivusa but hated the original execution.

I really like the idea of two kids who have been so hurt by the people that were meant to protect them figuring out how to love each other. How to be open and trusting and just how to work as a couple.

Riven and Musa fall very slowly over the course of a year and a half, they get to know each other, be friends, quite crucially: they’re able to be vulnerable with each other. Which is huge for both of them.

And, when they realize that these feelings are serious and more than just a crush, they are both terrified.

I’ll talk a bit more about Riven’s feelings on his thesis but for Musa, she’s scared of this failing, of flying till the bone crush like the queen would say. She’s scared of it going wrong and losing someone she loves so much.

The part I love about this is that this means that even after they get together we get to see them fuck up. Because just because they’re together doesn’t mean they’re just going to forget years of trauma and having their walls up.

And, in my version, once they’re together, it’s Musa who fucks up by keeping secrets and not being able to bring herself to be vulnerable.

I think my fave part about writing these two is writing about how they grow together both as individuals and as a couple, how they learn to communicate and be vulnerable and realize that they are both here to stay and that this relationship is soft and safe and everything that they have been denied for so long.

That’s what this couple is to me. Two kids learning to love and not be afraid of it.

Helia

Helia and Musa are the writers of the group, due to them both being artist and having had past or present issues with their fathers and being vulnerable, it made sense for them to be platonic soulmates.

They’re the kind of people to spill their guts out of paper and just take a pen and truly speak, word vomit comes out in prose and metaphors and long words that just make you feel serene.

That’s how they find it easier to communicate.

They bond over words and music and the crushing weight of a knot in your throat not letting you speak when it matters most. The falling feeling of everything coming out wrong when spoken but in a beautiful way when written.

Helia is the only person Musa co-writes with for her songs, because he gets her voice as a songwriter in a way that no one else does.

And Helia shared his favorite poems because he knows she’ll get them in the way few could.

They are the artists who write not just because they enjoy and love it, but because it’s a crucial part of who they are, of how they process things and how to keep going.

If you wanna get to know these two, the best way to do it is to look at what they write.

And that’s why they just click.

Who is Musa in this Rewrite?

Musa is a girl who’s hurt. Who has lost and has had to almost raise herself.

She’s done the best that she could but the best she could do to protect herself at the time, back home with her father was to build walls around herself.

She’s someone who is learning to be open and vulnerable and to believe the people she loves won’t leave.

She’s someone trying to leave behind a toxic environment and mindset.

Someone who is, in one word haunted. By her past, by both her parents be it in different ways, by words, by Stormy.

But she’s learning to live with it, to still grow and to not take steps back in her journey.

She’s an artist finding her meaning and voice.

—————

Masterlist

Musa Moodboard

Musa’s Instagram

Musa and Tecna Moodboard

Musa and Riven Moodboard

Musa and Helia Moodboard

—————

so this one took so long cause I couldn’t figure out how to word certain things and tbh I feel like this one is the worst one so far so pls validate me and tell me it was good I feel like crying but I think I managed to get everything across

[nevereverthem]

Imagine after sending Ms. Cuddles away that Bonnie developed insomnia which eventually led to Kai becoming Mr. Cuddles 🥰

TVD :

Given the moment this happens, I couldn't get myself to make her lose sleep and end up in Kai's arms as if they didn't mutually stabbed each other not so long ago. Since I kind of try to stick to how the character was written.... before the merge, he doesn't show much empathetic pretty feelings.

So here's my version, with a little twist.

PS : I intended it to be quite short but got carried away. I ended up talking about numerous things before getting to the point, but I hope you'll still enjoy the story.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

May 10th 1994, prison world.

An eclipse. Kai Parker. Bonnie Bennett.

She was chanting a spell that would bring them back to their world.... It stopped abruptly. She's lost her magic. In fact, she's just put her magic in her beloved Miss Cuddles, sending the teddy bear to the 2010's.

Kai's cry resonated through the cave. He walk-rushed right to Bonnie.

_ Where's the stupid bear ?

_ Oh, it's gone. I guess we're stuck here. Forever.

She holds his gaze, whispering.

_ Sorry.

He inhales loudly, an incredulous laugh escaping his mouth.

_ Bonnie, Bonnie, Bonnie.... You'll regret this.

His psycho smile's been replaced by a menacing expression.

_ I don't think so.

She seems confident, despite being aware of the fact she's locked herself up with a killer. She couldn't let him out of this prison, in the present, murdering more members of his family.

_ You lost your powers. You've doomed us to be stuck here for damn eternity ! You think you had it bad during four months ? Try eighteen years. Alone. 'Cause, I suppose you don't fancy a truce with the enemy around a nice diner.

_ I'd rather die starved and dehydrated under the burning sun than spend one more day with you around.

He huffs in response.

_ Right.... You'll want me back. Somehow. When you've gone insane from the loneliness. No sounds at all, except from yours. Tired of your own voice, you'd rather punch your face than to hear one more syllable come out of your mouth. When you're on the verge of suicide, with no escape from your own mind.... When all of your being craves the only thing left, human company....

He slides a hand in his pocket, pulling out his pager.

_ Beep me ! 555hikai. I'll come and watch the show.

The last thing Bonnie sees is Kai's sadistic grin growing on his face. Then she turns her back, determined to get as far away from him as possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The witch spends several more months in this prison world, going through the routine she had with Damon, now on her own. It seems like Kai didn't bother following her to haunt her days. She's stopped being useful to him after all.

At first she's holding on, hoping Damon got the teddy bear. Her friends will find a way, they'll come and get her out of here. She's counting on them, as they counted on her so many times. She concentrates her thoughts on happy memories with her friends. She counts the days to keep tract of the real time. When supposed-Christmas season comes, she even decorates a tree with garlands and christmas bulbs. Shortly after, she's hit by a wave of angry desperation and burns the tree. Who does she fake happiness for ?

A few more months later, it all becomes unbearable. It's her birthday. She's still in that hellhole. Alone. She's read every book she could find, searched every mystical object. Nothing. No way out. She's been stuck in this place for nearly a year now and she's had enough.

In a last celebration, she finally decides to open the bottle of bourbon Damon and her had made a pact on. After drinking three quarter of the bottle, she walks to the garage, closing the outside door. She starts the car so the carbon monoxide begins filling the room. Then, she slumps down the floor, back against the vehicle.

A camera in hands, she presses the recording button and starts talking.

_ I'm Bonnie Bennett, locked in a time loop in 1994. Elena, Damon, whoever.... Hi. If you find that video, it means you've managed your way in. It means you didnt give up on me....

Tears start gathering in her eyes.

_ I miss you. I miss you so much.... I miss saying hi to strangers, ordering diner in a restaurant, laughing with my friends. Every day with no one to talk to. Going weeks without speaking. The loneliness....

She bumps her head onto the car behind, crying....

_ I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.... I can't.... I promise I tried....

Her sobbing turns into a cough.

_ You know, Kai told me I wouldn't last long. I almost miss him.

She chuckles at her own statement, tears running down her cheeks.

_ You hear that Damon ? I miss that sociopathic murderer. Not that I'd ever forgive his manipulation, the arrow shoot, the chasing, the manhandling.... but I'd settle for a talk. He's the only human left here, wherever he might be. It'd be a hell of a last talk but...

She pauses a second, pondering.

_ I can't let him win. I'm stronger. I know I am.

She immediately stops the video, forcing her body to rise. She stumbles. The gaz has filled her lungs, making her weak. She can't stop coughing, vision blurred. She falls to the floor, desperate to crawl outside....

Suddenly, she hears a door slam open, someone walking in her direction.... Kai !

She makes an effort to look up at him.

He's standing right beside the switch of the garage's door, holding an oxygen mask before his face. He seems.... pained ?

_ You didn't beep me.

Right before she falls into unconsciousness, the door opens, filling the room with fresh air. The last thing she sees is an arm lifting her up the floor and an oxygen mask crashing on her face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's strange in here. All's kinda blurry, green-ish. She doesn't recognise the place she's in.

Two children appear in front of her, coming in her direction. Before she can realise, they both pass through her body before running away.

She's a ghost. Great ! She exhales in exasperation.

She hears knocking behind her. Turning around, she sees a woman opening a door.

_ Malachai ?

Mala.... Kai ?

Bonnie urges to the room. Nobody can see her anyway. She's faced with an unexpected picture.

A little boy's sitting on his bed, brow furrowed, a sad expression on his face.

_ You hate me !

_ No, no my love, I don't hate you.

That's his mother.

_ I already told you. It's safer that way.

_ I just wanna play with my sister.

_ You can't. We don't want you to harm her.

She's stern but soft at the same time. The boy's pleading.

_ I won't ! Please !

_ Malachai, no.

He starts sobbing, tears threatening to run down his face.

He extends his arms, reaching for a hug. The woman cries in pain. It's only a second, but it's enough to hurt her. The moment he hears her pain, young Kai removes his hands, horrified.

_ Mom ?

_ It's okay.

It's faint, but she smiles at him.

Loud stomps are heard in the stairs, the face of a man appearing in the door frame. His father.

The man doesn't say anything. He comes inside the room, wraps his arms around his wife, and carries her outside.

Just before he leaves, he glares at his son, a warning look on his face. Then, he closes the door, the lock clicks. The boy's alone.

He freezes a moment, holding back his tears.

Bonnie stays there, observing him. She can't recognise the emotionless murderer she knows in that little boy standing here, petrified from his own action.

Her train of thoughts is interrupted by shouting coming from downstairs. Little Kai slowly walks to the door, putting his head on the wood, an attempt at eavesdropping. The witch imitates him.

_ See what he did to you ?

_ He didn't mean to.

_ Of course ! Like he didn't mean to siphon his sister last week !

_ He just wanted to play....

_ We almost lost her ! That power, that thing, it kills people ! It's an abomination !

_ I know !.... But he's still our son.

The boy can't hold back anymore, he breaks down, falling to his knees by the door. A flow of tears escapes his eyes, running down to his neck, staining his shirt.

_ Kai....

Bonnie raises a hand, reaching for his cheek. Her hand disappears the moment she touches his skin, sinking through his body. She can't touch anything. Despite facing the man he became, manipulative and vengeful, she can't help but want to wipe away the tears of his younger self....

All of a sudden, the image of the boy fades. It's replaced by short fragments of discussions, people....

She sees it all pass before her eyes. The family reject, locked in his room countless times. The accidental siphonings. The pain. The addiction. The help he never get, learning by himself. Hurt turning into rage. Emotions buried away. Finally d-day. Merge refused. The snap. The killings. The banishment. Flashes of his months trying to find a way out of the prison world. His desperation. The moments he broke everything around him, punching his reflection in the mirror.... Then, all his attempted suicides. As she had just tried. The thing is, he succeeded. He actually did die. Each time. Coming back to life. Each time. Trying to kill himself for years. She saw all those times, all the suicides. Stabbing himself with a knife, throwing himself off a cliff, painkillers overdose, numerous unknown needle injections, shooting an arrow at himself, cutting his arms open with a kitchen knife, car crash, real guillotine in a museum.... She felt them all. She felt them in her body. Excruciating pain, vengeance desire, hurt, rage, fellings, despair.... Then nothing. Void. Just that feeling. They're going to suffer as much as I did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bonnie snaps awake, gasping, jerking in a sitting position. She's panting, trying to catch her own breath.

She looks around. It's the Salvatore house. She's sitting on the couch next to the fireplace. She's actually sitting across someone's lap....

_ Kai !

Eyes wide, she abruptly pushes herself off of him, hands on his chest. Parts of the nightmare she just had make their way through her mind. She freezes, still too stunned to move away. Kai has an arm lazily rested around her waist, a blanket covering them both.

The man hears someone calling his name through his sleep. His eyelids open, watery from a troubled nap. He notices the eyes piercing through his own.

_ Hi ! Awake ?

The witch seems disoriented, wearing a traumatized look on her face. Kai's voice sounds too casual for the position they're in.

_ Oh, yeah, hum.... When I carried you out of the garage and took you here, you started to get all sweaty and cold. The fire and the blanket didn't help. So I figured.... the whole 'body heat' thing.... Well.

Bonnie doesn't respond. She doesn't move either. Kai waves a hand before her face. She doesn't even flinch. Given her lack of responsiveness, the man extends a leg in an attempt at walking away.

She stops him. A hand on his shoulder.

_ That was yours, right ?

The man gives her a confused look.

_ What ?

_ The nightmare... It was yours.

Now, that's his mouth whose's shut.

_ Kai ? Is this all true ? Or did you manage to feed me false visions ?

His expression's petrified, angry-sad-ish ?

_ How ? You don't have your magic back. I would have felt it. How did you-

_ I take that as a yes.

She doesn't know how it happened, how it's even possible. She must have felt him in her sleep and got into his head. She's not supposed to have her magic back. She's doesn't. But she somehow was able to get through him. All of him.

It surely doesn't feel like he's down to have that conversation. And she clearly needs time to process all she's just witnessed in her sleep. But there's one thing bugging her now. It just popped in her head. She was able to get inside his mind because she's here, alive, thanks to him....

_ How did you know I was in the garage ?

The question is enough to get the man out of his thoughts. He's expression's back to 'normal'.

_ I was watching over you.

_ You were... how ? There's nothing here you can get magic from.

A guilty smile grows on his face.

_ Hiding in a house doesn't require a cloaking spell.

The witch's dumbfounded, her mouth opening in an 'o'. She's also kind of impressed by his discreteness, and a tiny bit scared.

_ Stalker much ?

He fake-gasps, being falsy offended.

_ That stalker just saved your life !

_ Why ? You couldn't just 'enjoy the show' ?

Her quoting him after all these months sort of gives him an ego boost.

_ First, you didn't beep me, meaning you didn't know I was there, so that's no fun. Secondly, dying on your birthday ? Even I know it's pathetic. And exhaust poisoning.... Seriously ?

_ You tried it too. I saw it.

How does she.... Right, 'the nightmare'.

_ For the record, it wasn't on my first attempt.

They suddenly both fall silent. His smile fades, her expression darkens. Even though they're discussing the situation, the touchy subject of suicide affects them both too much to keep arguing.

Also, Kai doesn't know how much she saw and he's certainly not letting himself be vulnerable by slipping out information she doesn't already have.

Despite being physically close at this moment and having an oddly casual conversation with him, Bonnie is far from feeling safe. She wraps her arms around herself.

_ Are you here to kill me ?

Kai chuckles, brows furrowed, mocking her.

_ After I stopped you from doing it yourself ? That would be so evil !.... I like the way you think.

His amused grin reappear on his face. The familiarity of his expression nears reassurance. He adds.

_ I'm not here to kill you. I weirdly got used to 'not harming you'.

She huffs in response, eyeing him incredulously.

_ That's progress.

He can look as sincere as he wants, the witch isn't fooled by his words.

_ You wanted to stay close in case I ever happen to find a way out, am I right ?

_ Guilty ! But I got myself useful. I stopped you from.... You know.

Here we go again... She shakes her head, pushing the thought away.

_ Why ? We have no way out. I'm not getting my magic back.

He shrugs, terrifyingly soft in his words.

_ I still want the company.

_ The company ?

Now she's mad.

_ You shot me with and arrow !

_ You killed me with a pickaxe.

_ You murdered your siblings !

_ You....

He stops. He doesn't feel any remorse, he believes they deserved it. But he can't deny what he's done, nor can he form any excuse she would accept.

_ You know you wouldn't have popped out again like me, right ?

Change of subject ? She wants to argue and force him to explain himself, somehow. That's when she remembers the dream, the memories.... She gives in, answering the question.

_ That was the whole point....

_ Don't do that again. Please.

_ You're concerned about me now ?

He exhales, a stupid look back on his face.

_ Look, I was kinda hoping you would get up and walk out by yourself. You were about to, but then you tripped and that was it.... I couldn't let you die. I mean, if I can't get out of here, I'd rather not lose my main entertainment.

She rolls her eyes at the ceiling. That sounds more like him.

After so much unusual conversation, the witch's mouth feels dry, eyes tired, a crushing headache making its appearance. She closes her eyes, hand on her forehead. Kai notices her discomfort.

_ Hangover ?

_ Ya think ?

He nods in understanding.

_ You drank more than half the bottle of bourbon. By the way, what's their thing with bourbon ? That's, ugh !

He wears a disgusted expression, making a giggle escape from the witch's lips.

_ At least, that knocked me out. I haven't had a good night's sleep for ages.

_ I know.

His statement came out a bit too fast. He's nowhere near shy of a person but the lack of restraint in his talk leaves him with an apologetic look.

_ Did you watch me sleep ?

The accusing tone in her voice is flagrant.

_ Oh, no. Please !.... Okay once ! I was intrigued.

He is unbelievable. She's not surprised, but she'd hopped to have a little intimacy. She doesn't want to think about what else he might have seen. She's not going to ask. Ever.

She blinks a couple of times, trying to block any invasive thought about a certain man spying on a naked Bennett witch....

_ Miss Cuddles.

_ What ?

_ I've had trouble sleeping since I don't have her with me....

_ Whose fault is that ?

He's the one accusing this time.

_ I had my reasons.

Silence. He doesn't bother. The witch's mouth opens wide, letting out a loud yawn.

_ Tired ?

She only nods, slowly shifting towards the man, putting her head back on his chest.

Kai flinches at her movements.

_ What are you doing ?

_ Getting back to sleep.

_ On me ?

_ Yep.

Direct answer, as if there was no problem with that. The man frowns in confusion.

_ I may be a sociopathic murderer, Bon....

She notices him quoting what she's said recording her video a few hours ago.

_ ....but I'm clever enough to know I'm the last person you'd like to willingly cuddle with.

She steps back, looking straight in his eyes.

_ You're right. You're a bad person craving for touch, and I'm desperate. Win-win.

Her blunt logic hits something inside of him.

_ You think that low of me ?

_ Didn't show me much better.

_ Fair enough.

In a silent agreement, she places her head back on his chest, Kai's arms wrapped around her waist in a shy embrace.

_ And from what I've seen, I'm not the only one who could use a hug.

He wants to argue, but then remembers.... She knows. She saw him. Little Kai. 'Right where it hurts', he thinks.

_ Does that mean I've become your new teddy bear ? Am I the brand new Mister Cuddles ?

His voice sounds so excited it's endearing. Bonnie looks up at him. He winks, offering her a stupid grin, which hides much more. She has proof now.

_ Shut up.

She lowers her head, eyes closed.

_ If you promise not to invade my head again.

_ I'll try.

It may be a mistake, a bold move, a dumb experience, call this what you want, but she needs it. Wether it'd be a friend, a complete stranger, or an enemy.... She needs it. Human touch. She's got no magic to be sucked. It's 'safe'. For now....

A few minutes later, she's already fallen asleep.

Kai's watching her, sleeping in his arms, chest heaving at each intake of breath. He thinks about planting a kiss on top of her head, but it's not worth the risk. He doesn't remember the last time he got to hold someone, or the last time someone volunteered to hold him. He's thrown his feelings away a long time ago, but he would be lying if he'd say this didn't make his heart beat faster....

The End.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Words : 3k ~ how on earth ? When I said I got carried away. 🙄

That took fricking long to write !!

I don't even know if it actually respects the request. >< Sorry ?

Next time, say it if you want me to change Kai's personality a bit. If you want him to have more feelings than in the actual TV show, especially before the merge.

Don't hesitate to tell me your impressions.

✨❤️💀❤️✨

The Vampire Diaries Masterlist

[clicheantagonist]

WiP Wednesday Friday

just shy of the weekend!!!

Thankies for the continued inclusion in the tags: @socially-awkward-skeleton @adelaidedrubman @aceghosts @josephslittledeputy @shallow-gravy and @inafieldofdaisies

I'M BACK ON MY BULLSHIT AND I'M FINALLY POSTING THE BOYS AU after I completely changed the plot I worked on for months a day and a half ago. Ehehehehe chaos.

Be gentle, I really did just let the first impulsive thought win after months of struggling to write and KEEP writing.

“You'd sell me to the Devil without a second glance. Trade me for a paycheck if you got the chance. […] One of many, but you say the best you've ever had. So tell me that you love me, then stick the knife in my back. God, I really worry 'bout the people that you stab, but it's your turn soon. Karma is a bitch like you.”

-Maisy Kay (ft Teisto), “Karma Is A Bitch Like You”

 “There was some other God then, a God for whom the spilling of blood was a prayer, an act of devotion. And they’ve been praying to that God their whole lives.”

-Brandon Taylor, “Filthy Animals”

“Shepherd.” Alex answers, work phone trilling loudly beside her as she lounges in bed, watching the news with morbid fascination. It seemed the Supes had beaten the mad scientists and their corpo overlords in the race to control the country. Not something on Alex’s yearly bingo list, but not entirely shocking, either.

“Got a job for ya, love.”

Alex sits up, eyes narrowing as she looks frantically for the remote to mute the tv.

“I’m sorry, but I’m not taking new clients right now and – “ Alex starts, laying low amidst the current political unrest.

There’s something familiar about the voice on the other end of the call, but it brings a vague, anxious connotation with it.

“Aw, don’t remember me, eh? That stings.”

Alex’s lips pull up in an amused smirk. At her age, coupled with her substance abuse and all the head trauma through the years, her memory isn’t what it once was and she’s open to being wrong.

“Refresh my memory.” Alex invites, curiosity gnawing at her. Its not often she can’t recall a voice, certainly not one as distinct as this guy’s.

“You and yer hubby had a run in with tha C.I.A. some years ago over biological weapons trafficking.”

Alex has to think back a moment, there had been several close calls with various law enforcement agencies throughout the years, but there’s a reason Alex is still a free woman.

“City?” Alex presses, drawing a blank.

“Miami.”

“Were you a bribe or a break?” Alex asks, not finding the further information helpful.

“Break. Ya dislocated me shoulder.”

He doesn’t sound annoyed or resentful, rather it sounds like he’s chuckling around his words.

“Ah! Yes! Handsy Fed that treated me like I  was bein’ trafficked! I do remember you. Got some tracking skills, Mister - ?” Alex laughs in recognition, the memory flooding back of the scene she unintentionally caused when some DHS assholes wanted to get a little too hands on with Wesker (and their bags). There was no quicker way to piss Alex off, especially at the end of a long, stressful retrieval mission. She'd been more than a little upset over being heckled by the stupid government after that.

“Butcher. Glad I made an impression.”

 “We are the last people standing at the end of the night. We are the greatest pretenders in the cold morning light. This is just another night, and we've had many of them. To the morning we're cast out, but I know I'll land here again.”

- Bastille, “Get Home”

Alex makes the short flight to Delaware, to meet Butcher in the smallest, most 90s diner she’s ever been in.

He’s already there, sitting in the last booth opposite the door. The diner is long and narrow, like a strip mall bar. There’s a cook barely visible in the little window behind the front counter, and a tired looking waitress straightens up off the table with a sigh, reaches for a menu and passes it to Alex as she passes the table.

“Here ya go, honey. Sit wherever ya like and I’ll be over with coffee.” She instructs, fixing a smile on her face that doesn’t look genuine (but Alex is glad for the attempt to seem happy).

“Thank you. No rush.” Alex takes the laminated menu and continues towards Butcher’s dark shape in the back. Alex notices her heels tapping on the tiles louder than the old TV in the corner, over the counter, playing the news.

‘Good ol’ 24 hour news cycle. Worst thing that ever happened to this country.’

“Good morning,” Alex greets brightly, sinking into the other side of the booth, facing the door, and making eye contact with the former Fed. ‘Well he’s quite handsome. That’s a plus.’

Butcher makes no attempt to hide the way he sizes Alex up as soon as she nears the table. Alex knows right away she’s dealing with a predator like her; there’s a look that comes with that, one that sees more than most would at first glance.

‘That’s okay, I’m eye-ballin’ you too, handsome.’ Alex thinks, casting him a cursory once over before returning to the single page plastic menu. From her peripheral, Alex watches the tired waitress return with a white mug and pot of coffee.

“Need a minute, hon?” The woman asks, causing Alex to look up with a pleasant smile.

“I’m ready actually. I’ll do the steak and eggs, rare, over medium, no toast, and home fries, please.” Alex orders, waiting for the brunette to stop writing on her pad before offering the menu back.

“You hungry? I’m payin.” Alex asks the stoic ex-Fed across from her, noticing he makes no attempt to even acknowledge the waitress.

Butcher’s eyes narrow briefly in Alex’s direction before he answers, still not bothering to look at the waitress.

“Jus’ eggs an’ toast. Scrambled, wheat.” He mutters, voice a gravelly rumble that Alex wouldn’t mind hearing more of.

“You got it. I’ll have that right out for ya.” The waitress chirps, sounding a bit more awake, and seemingly not taking offence to Butcher’s stand-offishness.

They wait for her to leave before Alex speaks again.

“How safe is it to talk here?” She asks, reclining in the booth, stretching her legs under the table, crossing them at the ankles, toes resting on the bottom opposite booth. She reaches up, rubbing her eyes and blinking them clear.

“Safe enough for some specifics. But I’m gonna come righ’ out an’ say it now – this ain’t for tha faint of heart. They all gotta go, an’ if you get in me way, you will, too.” Butcher tells her seriously, jumping right to the meat of the situation, as it were. Alex appreciates that in a client.

Alex’s lips twitch up, eyes half-lidded even as they occasionally shift between the door, the counter, and the man in front of her.

“I appreciate the warning. Do you expect me to get in your way?” Alex asks, playing it diplomatically, she wants to get a read on this man who managed to find her – its not often those outside her very particular circle manage to locate her.

Butcher smiles.

“Ya never expect it, but it happens.” He replies coyly. Alex raises a brow, smile widening the slightest bit.

“I think I understand. As long as you keep me in the loop, you won’t have to worry. I’m still alive because I deliver.”  Alex replies, knowing well what kind of animal she’s dealing with now.

“That’s what I hear.” Butcher replies, the muscles in his face visibly relaxing.

“So hang on, what makes you think I’ll take such a dangerous job with no guarantee of payment?” Alex chuckles, cutting into her steak.

“Ya don’t survive this long doin’ stupid shit like that. Sell it to me.” Alex requests, gesturing vaguely in Butcher’s direction with the piece of steak speared on her fork.

“Aw c’mon, don’t bust me balls, love.” Butcher grumbles around a sheepish smile Alex knows is not genuine.

“Get used to that. C’mon, convince me why I should risk my life for a stranger, taking on what could well be an actual Fool’s errand?” Alex encourages, curious as to what’s up Butcher’s sleeve. She can tell he’s quite calculating and clever, certainly he’s thought of this before reaching out to her.

“Savin’ tha world ain’t enough?” Butcher asks, still smiling, knowingly this time. He’s teasing her.

Alex hums a laugh before popping the piece of steak into her mouth. She chews and swallows before she replies.

“That was very cute, but you wouldn’t have reached out to me if you thought that line would have worked.” Alex replies, unaffected.

Butcher nods and laughs softly.

“You’ve kept a low profile since ‘e died. Condolences, by the way.” Butcher tells her abruptly, still smiling that malicious little smile. Alex knows her mask cracks some at the unexpected mention of Wesker, but she rolls with the punch, no stranger to the mind games people play.

‘I play them better.’

“Thank you,” She replies, voice the slightest bit choked. He knows more than she would like him to.

“I’m askin you because you’re rudderless. Adrift in tha open ocean. Wouldn’t it be nice to ‘ave direction and purpose again? Really shake up tha world, jus’ ta show ya can?” Butcher asks, leaning forward conspiratorially, arms resting on the edge of the table.

Alex tips her head and sets her fork and knife down, regarding Butcher critically. It’s concerning he’s so confident about his read of her.

“Son of a bitch, I’m in. Fuck it.” Alex answers, around a stunned laugh, reaching over the table with her right hand to shake, and Butcher grasps it firmly, pulling her in over the table.

Alex gasps, but catches herself before she lands chest first in breakfast.

“We gotta leave now then, you’re workin with a marked man.” Butcher murmurs around a reckless smirk that makes Alex think she’s found an unexpected comrade.

Her brows shoot up and her expression twists briefly in stunned shock, more over being physically dragged than his actual words.

‘I’m a magnet for troubled men.’

“Woulda worn different shoes, if I knew that.” Alex replies, expression relaxing into a soft kind of annoyance.

[kandismon]

Do you have any tips for those who wish to create a webcomic?

I do apologize if this has been asked before!

this is a pretty big question that would probably be easier to answer if you had any specific things you'd like to know about!

but i can give you a summary of general things i've learned over the years!

disclaimer: these are my personal experiences, if any of this sounds like something that doesn't fit your workflow or preferences, please disregard!

if you've never made a webcomic before, i would personally recommend starting small. do a short oneshot first to see how it feels instead of diving right into your multi-season 2000 pages big epic story, because i feel like the workload can get really overwhelming really fast if you go from 0 to 100 right away. some creators thrive on that but it was definitely not for me. i have a lot of failed and unfinished projects sitting around because i was too ambitious and didn't know what i was getting myself into. later on i started drawing short comics for various fandoms & ships i was invested in deeply, and those got progressively longer until i suddenly felt ready to seriously tackle one of my original stories again. which was when i finally started working on #MUTED!

don't worry about sticking to the strict 60+ panels weekly schedule that you see a lot on platforms like webtoon for example. unless you've signed a contract, you make the rules and decide how much and how often you post. i've seen a lot of creators burn themselves out over that when there really wasn't any need because no one was forcing or paying them to churn out so much all the time T -T) you can still find an audience and success with a slower pace (for example #MUTED was released with 2 episodes a month, 1 ep usually had around 20ish panels iirc)

finished is better than perfect. if you're a perfectionist this can be difficult to accept, but i promise most people won't look at your panels for longer than 1.5 seconds. some wonky lines here and there don't matter much, it's more important to get the feelings across imho.

vector layers (for inking) are your best friend \o/

imho having a pretty clear outline for your story can be really helpful and take away some stress, knowing where the story is going without having to constantly sit down inbetween chapters to come up with more plot is a blessing and i wish i had been better about doing that with #MUTED. i did have a rough outline but a lot of holes in between chapters and in the end some things i would have liked to explore more never got touched on because my planning was bad and i wasn't able to find the room in the story (like some emma back story, more about jasper's family dynamics, also a bit more of a deep dive into kai's relationship with his family) (also towards the end i felt pretty burned out and just wanted to move on haha) [i'm not saying to plan every scene right from the get go, there's always room to adjust and remove or add stuff while you're working on the project, but a few important anker points here and there are important, at least for me!]

shortcuts are also your best friend, use all of them. 3d models too!

when you start publishing, don't get discouraged by algorithms and statistics and numbers (i say as that's something i still struggle with daily LOL), agonising over these things is pointless because they're mostly out of your control, focus on things you can actively do to be proud of your work. also instead of comparing yourself to others, instead compare yourself to past you! look how far you've come compared to the you from last year :>

i hope any of this helps, sorry for rambling lol if there's ever any specific questions, my asks are always open and i'll do my best to try and help out!! i'm also still learning and don't consider myself to be a person who really has anything to teach to anyone, but i can share my progress and experiences and hype you up if needed, hehe

good luck with your comic!!

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

Hihi!!! For any of yours:

Who would your OC say is their best friend?

Which canon character doesn’t respect your OC whatsoever?

Thank you!

HIII!!!!!! Thank you so much for the ask ^^ and for answering mine!! Throwwwwing it under a cut bc I can never talk about Vizzie without talking about Angst so TW for child death/murder <3 also mention of Weed/stoner (not Vizzie)

Who would your OC say is their best friend?

Vizzie:

If she's being honest with herself, she would say it's the childhood best friend Kai, which uh. She. Killed. When they were 8. But in TWST...I think the way she qualifies "best friend" is who makes her happiest to be around. So even though he's more of a little brother figure before a best friend, Ortho is her lil buddy. She adores him. But if we cut out the familial bonding (so Leona is out of the picture too), I think she would consider her best friend Deuce. (They end up being metamours in the future which is even better). But he's relatively quiet when it's just him without Ace, which is nice for her. She likes to help him study, and he lets her speak her notes out loud so the lessons stick with her easier. They both struggle with emotional regulation to varying degrees, and in her canon she's the one who collaborates with Vil to get Deuce and Epel Gremlin Bells for their blastcycles ^^ Aspen:

Sam, lol. They were roommates together (to me, both in Pomefiore). They've been inseparable since their first year. I recently wrote a silly little ficlet where Aspen is involved ^^ Cory:

Epel!! Fellow Short First year struggling with gender identity and orientation while also being scouted by Vil OTL. While Cory considers Epel his best friend, Epel does not see him the same way, mostly because he barely knows the guy! Cory is very awkward and isn't used to interacting with folks, as a firefish mer, he rather enjoys hiding away. So just one or two positive interactions will have this guy believing you're BEST of friends.

Paisley:

His SHAZAM! figurine. 10/10 comfort item, and he can hold it while his (adoptive) papa Vargas is carrying him. Who is also his best friend. Vizzie is a big sister figure so he's chill with her too, but thats about it.

Which canon character doesn’t respect your OC whatsoever?

Vizzie:

Rollo. He can't wrap his head around why she would ever forgive magic users, especially when he clocks her vambraces having been put on her by force via a magic user. She can't even hate him back, because she sees so much of her old self in him by the time they meet, she just hopes that one day he can free himself of the hatred he carries, because she knows deep down it's internalized guilt and a coping mechanism.

Aspen:

Crewel hates my stoner half fae dude with a passion. Crewel worked hard for everything he achieved, Aspen is a gifted kid. Crewel tries to be protective and nurturing with his students, but they all choose to go to Aspen instead. Crewel very desperately wants to have buy in with the student body like Aspen does but tries to hide it.

Cory:

It's not that Vil disrespects him, he just feels like Vil pushes his boundaries a little too much for him to be comfortable around Schoenheit. He knows he's cute but gods Vil, he hates the cameras and having attention on him via social media.

Paisley:

Everybody Respects The Child Or Else

Thanks again for the ask ^^

[feathers-and-song]

Simple Introduction

Within the ranks of the Cloud Knights is the Xianzhou Luofu’s very own feathered Vidyadhara. It’s an enigma to everyone who lives here. Doctors have tried, and none have found an explanation for such deformities.

Sprouting from his head is not hair, but rather russet brown feathers with amber highlights. He has a similar set in tail form at the base of his tailbone, leading to his many personalized outfits, most of which he had to modify himself. His nails are rough and don’t file down easily, giving off the illusion of sharp claws. Kai’s ears are long, with a fur-like substance coating them, nearly identical to the Foxian’s. Unlike theirs, his ears are placed on the side of his head. Alongside all these oddities is one single snaggletooth where his left canine should be.

These deformities don’t bring him physical harm at all, but they do make life difficult, especially for a Cloud Knight. The armor never fits right, his helmet has a vulnerable opening in the back that he must constantly watch out for, and because of how sensitive his eyes are, he can’t wear the visor.

The armor isn’t the only thing making Cloud Knight work hard for him. Teasing words and spiteful glances from his comrades have also hindered his progress to get any sort of equal footing amongst them. Because of his malformations, Kai had always been given the short end of the stick in everything he’s involved with. No one wants to be associated with the world famous mutated Vidyadhara.

This isn’t to say he’s lonely. A small number of people have braved the waters of societal outcasting just for a moment to talk with him. This being his two best friends, Shiwen and Shufen. From such a young age, the three had kicked it off. They said they never minded how others saw their relationships, but Kai never could shake the disgusted looks from the High Elders when they overlooked them together.

Even though his group of friends started out small, it quickly grew thanks to one single person. Imbibitor Lunae (Dan Feng) had taken it upon himself to become a mentor to Kai at a young age when all others failed to teach him life skills. Dan Feng had quickly taken a liking to him, allowing the boy to grow up beside him and passing on his techniques and fighting skills to Kai.

Because of this near father-son connection between them, Kai had been given the ability to join the Cloud Knights despite failing the entrance exam a multitude of times. Shiwen would always complain about favoritism within their ranks, even after Kai had proven himself to be a worthy soldier. With his skills, he quickly moved up the ranks to Commander, most calling him a fair and calm leader.

Over his years, he became friends with Yingxing, and subsequently, the entirety of the High Cloud Quintet. He and Baiheng frequently gossip together about the latest affairs on the Xianzhou Luofu and Jingliu proved to be a worthy sparring partner, though he could never last more than a minute against her in hand-to-hand combat.

Because none of the Cloud Knight weapons or armor ever fit his style or biology, during his free time, he would search battlefields and scavenge off old Mara Struck soldiers, but always checked to make sure the mara was gone for sure before putting the pieces to use.

After a run in with a particularly frightful beast, he managed to dislodge part of its bone structure and used it as a spearhead for his weapon, which was thoughtfully crafted by Yingxing.

Kai will never forget his first meeting with Jing Yuan, which happened to occur while he was on bathroom clean up duty during his first few days in the Cloud Knights. It was quite a shock meeting Jingliu’s subordinate at such an early time, but Kai put himself together, dropped his mop, and saluted. If anyone were to ask Kai who his best friend was, Jing Yuan would be high on the list, right under Shiwen and Shufen.

His admiration for Jing Yuan would always trump his ability to hold any conversation with the guy, though Shufen will always bug him, saying she thinks it’s a bit more than “admiration”. Anything she says about the topic would be smothered by something new along with a red face. He dare not touch that idea, lest Jing Yuan think less of him.

As time went on, the tragedy of the High Cloud Quintet would strike. During the battle that took Baiheng’s life, Kai would be left with a hefty blow to his shoulder, forcing him to be inactive. The death of Yingxing would shake him to his core, with the betrayal of Imbibitor Lunae outright breaking him.

Suddenly everyone forgot about his physical appearance. Why were they so nice? Why did they care now? They didn’t before! It was only through the gentle hands of Jing Yuan that Kai was finally able to escape his mind, recover from his injuries, and retake his role as a Cloud Knight Captain.

Now, when people look at him, they don’t see the determined, nice, and steady leader they once knew. They see a tired man, who's been through hell and back. A man who blames himself for everything he could not do. But someone who is also there for his General, because he knows that Jing Yuan needs the support too.

From the path of the hunt…to Nihility. Kai wasn’t one to give up easily, but he’s starting to wonder just how much longer he’s willing to keep fighting.

[cutepresea]

Isn't it odd Symphogear didn't get any normal length OAV or movie made, or even on the merch side more nendo or nendo petit made considering how popular it was in Japan? I know the fear was real with prods and manus during the first two seasons because they thought it was a fail project and didn't want to invest but after five seasons and five concerts? I don't know I feel like I'm missing data on why we were given the short stick compared to other popular animes...

Ah, I never really felt like that when it comes to the series (except for figures, but I get to that later in the post. I went on a bit of a tangent and it ended up longer than intended. Oops)

Five whole seasons

Four series of shorts

Enough character songs to have a box of 9 CDs released (doesn't include XDU songs)

Concerts that get released on blu-ray since G's (this one just feels like a bigger deal to me because season 1's in 2012 never got recorded or released)

A mobile game that's been running for 6 years and gets its own albums separate from the aforementioned box (there was another mobile game a decade ago that died pretty fast but nobody remembers that one, shhh...)

And a monthly spinoff manga that has enough content for four volumes so far

...All feels like a miracle to me, especially for an anime not based on an existing manga, game, or light novel

Seriously, I love this series but I have no idea how G was greenlit

I'm still waiting to see what the new project is because there's still a possibility that it could be a movie or something. I just don't expect it anytime soon, whether it be a movie or an OVA, because Kaneko (co-creator and scenario writer for the series) is busy both designing and writing a RPG which he stated was something he wanted to do while not working on Symphogear since he was too busy to work on games while he was doing that (link is Japanese, but it's the interview where he said that)

Which, again, is probably why the new project is dated 20XX

Now if I were to talk about stuff I personally would want?

If it's a movie I'd like it to be completely new content but if they make some lengthier OVAs, I've been asking for an adaptation of 3.5 from XDU for a while since the Alexandria Incident gets mentioned in AXZ.

XDU's service isn't going to last forever and I'd hate to lose a canon side story like that when it does eventually end.

They could also do 4.5 but it isn't as high a priority for me because it serves more as an introduction to Noble Red than anything and outside of the short part between Fine and Enki, it felt weird coming out after XV ended

On a bit of a side note, I've said it before, but I wouldn't be too surprised if any new anime content is by Studio KAI instead of Satelight. A LOT of Symphogear's staff moved over there after XV ended which is why XDU's second OP was done by them.

Now merchandise, oh boy, yeah that subject has stung a bit over the years. The fact the only Nendos are from S1 really is sad

They want their friends to join them

Heck, Chris didn't even get a Figma back then like Hibiki and Tsubasa did

I can't believe it took as long as it did for Kirika, Shirabe, and Maria to get figures. Especially Maria, who didn't have one released until 2022.

And it is an actual crime that Miku still doesn't have one despite being around since season 1. That is Hibiki's Wife Sunshine y'all are ignoring. (Season 1 Miku with green hair when? 🤣)

Hobby Stock's set of scale figures they've been releasing and Good Smile's ACT MODEs are a step in the right direction though. There's also been more plushes in recent years which I personally really love.

One of my wishes is someone going back to G and making figures for that so we can get Black Gungnir Maria or Shenshoujing Gear Miku

The parallel world versions of everyone from XDU would be fun too but I'm not pushing my luck there. The other Hibiki technically already has one but it used an existing Hibiki figure as a base

And yes, I am begging for a game that isn't gacha. I'm a lover of action games and RPGs so I would love something along those lines. I'm not horribly picky about the specific type

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

3., 5., 8., 10., 34., 35., 36., 43., 44., 64.

3. How tall is your OC?

Hermes is average, maybe a little bit on the taller side. But these days he comes off as smaller than he is because he's thin and tends to slouch as if wanting to hide within himself.

Dr. Kay is also pretty average, but the way he carries himself makes him appear taller.

Kit is Tall. Not a giant like another character of mine, Louis, but he's close. He is also lean and wiry, which only adds to the effect. He certainly sticks out.

5. What does your OC normally wear? What would your OC wear on a special night?

Hermes has spent some time homeless prior to joining the ship's crew, so what he has is only one or two ill-fitting shirts, a simple vest, a pair of breeches and stockings he's spent some of his last remaining money on, and a dark neckerchief. He also has a a simple earring but I haven't decided yet whether it's something he's had before or gets it during his time on the ship. On special occasions, if he could afford it, he would definitely dress up. He used to be a gentleman after all.

Dr. Kay typically wears what one would expect of a man of his status - the usual coat, typically blue (or other muted colors, he doesn't like browns and greys though), a waistcoat, a shirt, a scarf etc. What however immediately strikes those who see him is that he always wears long trousers like a peasant. This is because he suffered polio as a child, which left his right leg badly affected, and he feels uncomfortable with the more acceptable tight-fitting breeches.

Kit also wears long trousers, along with shirts with long sleeves, but this is mostly to avoid sunburn. He usually wears a wide straw hat for the same reason. But when the weather is more forgiving, he will prefer to roll up his sleeves and switch to breeches without stockings. He likes the feeling of wind on his skin. Also even though he was recently made an officer, you will usually not see him in an uniform if he can avoid it. This is because the one he currently got is simply too short for him. Until he gets one that fits him, he will only wear it during ship ceremonies and always try to stand behind one of his shorter comrades, so others can't see the short sleeves.

8. How does your OC talk/what does your OC’s voice sound like?

I haven't decided on that yet. Kit would have a Newport accent though.

10. What does your OC keep in a special drawer?

Not sure for Hermes tbh. If he's had anything valuable he's most likely sold it. Most of those things were associated with his family anyway, so any sentimental importance would end up soured.

Kit probably still has a handful of Peuco's juvenile feathers. That bird is his baby.

Dr. Kay's special drawer contains all the opiates he needs to keep locked up from the crew.

34. What is your OC’s dream job and/or current profession?/35. How is your OC working towards his/her dream job and/or achieved his/her current profession?/36. What are your OC’s thoughts/opinions of his/her current profession?

Hermes was supposed to take over his father's position once his father retires, which was something he was pretty content with, but then he died, came back, gone mad, and was disowned. He has since abandoned any dreams and just seeks to survive. He joined the crew he is currently in out of necessity. Hermes needed money and food, they needed hands.

Dr. Kay wanted to be a man of medicine and a man of medicine he is. He of course had to attend schools and get practice, and was helped a lot by his family's connections, but here he is and he is more than happy. You could say that his reality ended up even better than his dreams since he's also found a wife who shares his interest. This voyage is his first as an official surgeon and the first time he could also take his wife along as his assistant, something they have both been looking forward to for years.

Kit has been working on ships since he was 10, he hasn't known anything else and doesn't seek anything else. But after being given a shot as a midshipman he is slowly finding that perhaps he is better suited as a regular sailor rather than an officer.

43. What kind of sense of humor does your OC have?

Hermes is not in much of a mental state for jokes these days, and his sense of humor is something I still need to dig around in.

Dr. Kay loves to make puns and witty remarks based on the situation, and loves when he can annoy people with them. He is so hardwired for verbal humor that he often lets it slip in the middle of arguments, which can deescalate the situation, or make it worse.

Kit is a jokester in general. He's also adept at verbal humor and often gets into pun wars with Dr. Kay much to the annoyance of everyone nearby. He is also not a stranger to pranks, tricks, rude gestures, and particularly loves involving Peuco. Some would say his sense of humor froze the moment he boarded a ship as a boy and hasn't changed since. However, a lot of the humor is to deflect any mean remarks towards him, or as a shield from his own painful past.

44. What are some things that greatly upset your OC?

Hermes is upset nearly all the time on account of suffering The Horrors.

Dr. Kay tends to take his patient's problems as his own, even if he has no way of actually helping them. Some would say this makes him ill suited as a doctor since sometimes he gets so worked up about a patient's bad situation it won't let him sleep. He will also not stand bigotry, particularly towards his wife. Offenses against her are perhaps the only reason he would resort to physical violence.

Harm Peuco in any way and Kit is out for murder.

64. What are some habits your OC has picked up?

Hermes spends most of his time looking down and avoid people's faces. To not see The Horrors. Also, when he's upset, anxious, or in general greatly emotionally unsettled, he tends to put his hand to his chest.

If possible, when sitting down, Dr. Kay will usually put both arms and rest his chin on his crutch in front of him. He also gestures a lot when he speaks.

Some cremates will tell you that if you observe Kit long enough, you'll notice he seems to have adopted some movements and habits from his hawk. He likes to spend time high up in the rigging and when something catches his interest, he will slightly bob his head from side to side. He will also tap with his fingers or his foot when bored or nervous.

Thank you!

[maoist-mizer]

Mid-Year Book Freakout 2023

tagged by my beloved, @hauntedmoors 🫀

1. Best book you’ve read so far this year?

Probably We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. I was already familiar with her since I remember reading The Lottery in high school, but this story really blew me away. I can’t wait to tuck into more of her writing, and just in general more gothic fiction, and just the weird and freakish overall.

2. Best sequel you’ve read so far this year?

I haven’t read many novel sequels this year, and none of them stuck out so I can’t really list anything. But I would say the second saga of Chainsaw Man, as a sequel, has been a highlight.

3. New release you haven’t read yet?

I’m such a loser, I literally got A Day of Fallen Night signed in person by beloved Samantha Shannon and I still haven’t read it yet 😭😭😭

4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year?

I don’t really keep up to date with upcoming releases, I just find out Somehow like through tumblr or my Goodreads mutuals, but I do know that the next Heartstopper volume is out sometime this year, so I’m looking forward to that.

5. Biggest disappointment?

I have three for this: Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi, Pet Sematary by Stephen King, and Vengeful by V. E. Schwab.

BtCGC was immensely boring, especially the writing — I guess you could say it’s own hype killed it for me. I heard that it was initially a play, or something along the lines of that? If so, then I think I can confidently say that with how it was written, it did not suit the medium.

Pet Sematary also disappointed me for not living up to its expectations as there’s this short section before the story starts where King basically says it’s one of his darkest stories yet and blah blah it chilled him so he had to put it away for a while before publishing it, so, obviously, I was quite excited!

But, once I actually got stuck into it, it just didn’t really stick out to me as anything special, well, at least compared to coming off reading Shawshank Redemption and ‘Salem’s Lot. Plus, ableism is quite rooted into this one so at times it just was difficult to enjoy, personally.

As for Vengeful, I felt that it was an unnecessary sequel. It didn’t add to Vicious, if anything I’d say it detracted from the overall story by following around all these new characters when what made Vicious so fun was the dynamic between Victor and Eli.

6. Biggest surprise?

I’m Thinking of Ending Things by Iain Reid was quite unexpected. It wasn’t one of my favourites so far from this year, but, regardless, was a big surprise since it deviated far from my expectations.

7. Favourite new author (debut or new to you)?

Sayaka Murata. I loved Convenience Store Woman and Earthlings so I’m intrigued for any future projects of hers! It was interesting how fundamentally similar these two books, like two sides of the same coin, but told in two very different ways. Fantastic stuff.

8. Newest fictional crush/newest favourite character?

Merricat my beloved <3 (also Fami and Asa)

9. Book that made you cry?

I’ve never cried while reading soz

10. Book that made you happy?

Love & Autism by Kay Kerr. I just felt very seen reading this, being able to identify myself within the pages. It also felt special to me since for once it’s not a book about autism addressed to allistic people, it’s a book about autism, written by an autistic author, for an autistic audience.

Tagging: @swordfaery @ignorantsackofeyeballs @moodymika @sarenite (no pressure if you don’t want to do this, also if you just see this post and want to do it feel free to continue the chain)

[boopjuice]

hehe hiiii tell me about Katherine

As a heads up before going into this, there is some mention of suicide in the story, in case that is something you want to avoid.

Okay, so Katherine is an oc I made for MHA. Basically, her quirk is based around blades, so she's able to create blades from the iron in her blood and control them. The blades form under her skin and actually cut their way out, eventually forming little pockets in her skin where it's easier for her to create blades from that she calls sheaths. She can reabsorb the blades, but can't reabsorb all the iron, so there's usually a little bit of iron dust that remains after she uses her quirk.

Anyway, she gets her quirk at four years old after a nightmare and, when she goes to tell her parents about the knives shooting out of her hands, she overhears her parents talking about how they'd be glad to have a quirkless daughter instead of one with a "villainous" quirk, since both parents already faced discrimination because their quirk were deemed villainous by peers and family. In Katherine's four year old mind, she figures that if she has a villainous quirk that her parents will abandon her, so she hides her quirk from then on. She pretends to take on a mimicry quirk, training her voice so she can copy any sound she hears.

Once she hits school age, she makes friends with a girl named Sunēkuai, or just Sunē for short, and alongside her childhood friend Kai the three decide to become heroes together. Kai has a water manipulation quirk, while Sunē can turn people into various reptiles and back, and she has snakes for hair. Their quirks lead people to harshly bully Sunē and Katherine, believing Sunē will turn out to be a villain and Katherine will turn into a random office worker with crushed dreams. But the trio stick together until the last year or so of middle school. Kai had been training to be a hero with some kids from his class and teaching Sunē and Kat what he'd been learning. When the group found out, they told him to either leave or stop teaching Katherine and Sunē.

At this point, Katherine has been training in martial arts for years. She knows by now that she isn't going to be abandoned, but her quirk is already in the registry and she fears getting in legal trouble for lying about her quirk, so she still keeps it to herself. Because of this, she has to be good at self defense, which is why she takes martial arts with Sunē. She's also got a few weapons courses, namely knife fighting since it wouldn't be too uncommon for a villain to have some kind of knife on them, and that's where she excels. She's also been practicing her quirk in secret, wanting to gain some more control over it even if she can't ever use it.

High school testing comes around, and she and Sunē test for all the same schools together. They don't try for U.A., they don't think they'll be able to make it, but Sunē manages to get into a C-list hero course. Katherine doesn't, and the two promise to stay in contact as much as possible with the two different schedules. They do, calling often and having study sessions together for topics they share like languages, math, and stuff of that sort. But Sunē starts to deal with harsher bullying in the hero course due to her quirk, and ends up committing suicide near the end of her first year.

Katherine is devastated, since the last time she saw Sunē she was planning on telling her about her quirk, her real quirk, so Sunē knew she wasn't alone. But Katherine's mom called, upset that she was hanging around with "that villain child," leading to a fight between them. Sunē told Katherine to go home to not cause further trouble, and Kat never got the chance to tell her about her quirk and how she'd been hiding it. Kat feels really guilty about it and vows to never use her quirk again, even in secrecy. She takes up smithing, making blades by hand and getting pretty good at it.

Once she gets a little better at it, she opens a nonprofit called Sunēkuai Blades, focusing on making custom blades for people and donating all funds to help with suicide prevention and raising awareness. From decorative pieces to functional kitchen knives, she makes everything by hand without the aid of her quirk, to the point she nearly forgets how to use it since it's been about ten years. The nonprofit is a side job though, since there isn't a lot of demand for blades like that, so she works full time at Kai's hero agency.

Kai doesn't really know she works there, since she's a low-level paper-pusher mostly. But he does meet her again when she comes in to give a tip about a case, a hero-killer copycat who leaves his blades at the scene and orders said blades from her nonprofit, which pisses her off since she makes her blades to try and save people. Anyway, she recognizes her own handiwork and calls in the tip, where she meets Kai for the first time in years as he helps the police get information from her. Kai pushes her hard, at first suspecting that she might have some connection to the villain since he remembers how she used to follow Sunē around, but eventually drops it. However, since she's lower in the ladder and providing the info took longer than expected, she gets in a bit of trouble with her boss.

Eager to make up for it, and get out of hot water, she works late the next day and is too tired to notice or effectively fight the guy that pulls her into the alley with unknown but certainly unpleasant intentions. On instinct, she accidentally uses her quirk and kills him, a small blade through his eye and into his brain doing the job without making too much mess. In a panic, she hides the body in a dumpster and heads home. The sleazy dude, however, was being trailed by the League of Villains. He'd stumbled into their bar a few weeks ago and had tried to pull a similar stunt on Toga. He managed to get away, but the League doesn't like loose ends (and the fact that I headcanon that they're all a big found family has absolutely nothing at all to do with this what are you talking about?) and want to kill the guy as revenge to make certain he doesn't tell the heroes where they are. Anyway, Twice watches Katherine kill him and dispose of the body and lets Shigaraki know, who gets really interested and wants to force Katherine to join the League since her quirk could be useful.

Katherine spends the next two weeks paranoid about heroes finding out what she did, as well as wrestling with the fact that she doesn't feel guilty about it. Meanwhile, the League spends that time stalking her, learning where she lives, works, does on a day-to-day basis, everything they can before sending Dabi in to kidnap her. They give him some extra time to hopefully find more dirt on her by having Shigaraki discreetly destroy some records one of Kat's coworkers were working on and making her stay late to help redo all the work. During this time, Dabi finds the designs that Kat really liked, duplicates of old orders that were too good not to have copies of. One of them, a katana with a bright green snake forged into the metal, has a picture of Kat and Sunē with a note to Sunē saying Kat thought she'd have like the design.

Katherine gets home from the impromptu overtime and, exhausted, doesn't notice the intruder in her home until it's too late. She wakes up in an interrogation room, where Dabi reveals that he knows her quirk and tried to press her for more information about it, hoping she'll spill some dirt about why she keeps it hidden to leverage her into joining the League. When that fails, he tries the same strategy as the now dead guy with much greater success. With Katherine's quirk revealed he's able to twist her arm and makes her join the League, however reluctant she is about it. She's not going to risk losing the life she built by revealing her quirk, it's far too late for that. Her choices are limited and very, very poor. So she goes along with their plans.

She spends a couple weeks at the hideout, learning her role in their upcoming plans as a seemingly random hostage used to bait heroes into death traps. During that time, she learns more about the members, their pasts and struggles, and find she sympathizes with them a little too much for her liking. She doesn't feel like she should relate so much to villains, and it scares her more than they do. Toga takes a liking to her, for obvious reasons, as does Dabi. He does so more out of respect for how resolutely she commits herself to her goals, in this case not getting found out, and how far she's willing to go to get what she wants.

Time comes to run the plan for the first time, and Katherine is surprised and more than grateful to see that the first hero they decide to pull the tactic on is Kai. She calls out to him by name, begging for his help to get away. She doesn't mention how wrong and yet how right the last few weeks with the villains felt. It's too scary to acknowledge right now. She just wants to get away and not have to worry about her quirk getting revealed.

But Kai refuses. Laughs in her face, in fact. Berates the League for choosing her as a hostage at random (so her thinks) because she's always been good for nothing, attaching herself to a would-be villain if she hadn't realized what a danger she posed to society and killed herself before that happened.

Which, understandably, pisses Katherine off.

She uses her quirk to kill the sidekicks with him before summoning the snake katana she'd made years ago out of the sheath in her arm, using it to kill Kai via beheading while he freaks out about her quirk not being what she said it was. She denounces him beforehand, calling out that he wasn't a hero and never had been, at least not in action. It's the last thing she says to him before she kills him, and just like the guy in the alley she doesn't feel remorse for what she does.

After that she decides that she can't go back to the life she built. She's killed two people, and even if she didn't particularly enjoy it she didn't feel any aversion to it. She'd been hiding an important part of herself for so long that it's been nice being around people who knew her secret and didn't treat her different because of it like she feared. They called her a villain not because of her quirk, but because of what she did, which really shouldn't have made as much of a difference as it did. But she decides to stay with the League and help them because they're the only ones who get it, and she just can't leave that behind.

[senatushq]

NAME. Lucian “Kay” Ames AGE & BIRTH DATE. 30  & September 22nd, 1993 GENDER & PRONOUNS. Male & He/Him SPECIES. Halfblooded ( Dhampir ) ABILITIES. Fire Manipulation OCCUPATION. Marshal & Writer FACE CLAIM. Dylan O’Brien

biography

( tw drug use, arson, death ) “In front of this window, before you can even glimpse any of this, there are these damn curtains. They’ve always been there, floor length and billowing. If you sit on the window seat, they enshroud you like some kind of translucent grey funeral veil. If the window is even cracked a little, wind takes to them and they’re all around you. It’s something mystical, at least that’s what mother used to tell me. The room was practically hers, she sat on that window with a book and a cup of tea every single morning and let herself be tangled in them. Let herself be thinly concealed from the rest of the world. She refused to tie the damn things down. If I had it my way I’d have tied them back with some kind of ribbon in that godawful fucking color and it would have choked the sheer material like a noose.”

The assignment had been to ‘’describe a presence within your house (a person, an animal, a piece of furniture, an illness, a secret, anything really) and use the five senses heavily” and his teacher had scribbled ‘nothing is too detailed’ with an exclamation mark beside it before copying and printing the page to be sent out. And he’d delivered what he considered to be his magnum opus. Because he spent eighteen years in that house and over a decade later, he doesn’t think he’s ever really going to shake what it felt like to be in it. To be afraid to talk to people for fear of them finding out what he was. Dhampir, son of a strigoi that had fled Europe to hide her offspring in the supernatural hub of Chicago. They were supposed to be hiding in plain sight and yet he often felt like he just sat there watching the world pass him by with no siblings, no father, no friends. It’d been a challenge to even get into public school and even then, he was supposed to go and come straight home. It was no wonder a lonely child became an angry teenager. He’d once thought his mother was doing what she could to protect him, that people were out to hurt them, that he’d never truly be accepted for what he was and therefore he needed to be hidden away. He sat and he seethed and he read and wrote and bided his time until he could leave the confines of that brownstone in the city.

“I was hardly a teenager when I set those curtains ablaze. It started small, a flicker of orange right at the bottom of them, right at the seams edge. It traveled along the stitching, climbed upwards towards the window seat. The grey was quick to turn black, to begin to curl in on itself. It spread to folds in the fabric, creating holes that varied in length like some kind of deadly moth eating away at it. It was beautiful and I just stood there and watched it happen, half of the left curtain twist and writhe in the gentle breeze as if it were trying to escape the flame.” His first taste of blood was at nineteen, he’d built up enough trust with his mother over the years to constitute him taking college classes, he’d snuck out to a party. With most of his social skills being mostly crafted by movies and books, he’s surprised he had any game at all, but he and a boy slipped away. What’d started with lips had ended with teeth and the moment they’d scraped delicate skin and he tasted metal, it was over and done with, he walked away. It’s not like he didn’t know what he was, it’s not like he didn’t know what it meant, if anything that’s all he knew. He’d grown up spoiled and paranoid, he’d consumed every nugget he could about what being a dhampir meant, what he could do. And then he’d moved onto vampires in general, learned everything he could about them, consumed media and books both fiction and non and frankly, he thought he kind of got the short end of the stick. Fangs but no bloodlust, no real allegiance to a bloodline, cut off from a community. His teenage years had been spent journaling, researching the creature he could have been to the point of obsession and yet when he’d been presented the opportunity to indulge in a way a vampire could, he’d fled. It was all downhill from there. The woman he called mother, the one who had coddled him and preached about his safety for nineteen years was found dead in their home. He’d come home to her body after class and there’d been no time to grieve because they’d planned for this. He had to go, he had to take money, a packet in a safe in the basement, whatever he could carry of his own belongings, and he had to get the hell out of Chicago. A fake passport gets him to France to stay with an ‘Aunt’ and once he’s there he experiences what Trent Reznor calls ‘The Downward Spiral’. Because there’s no safety net anymore but he’s also off the leash for the first time in his life and it is too much and not enough at once. Years have been spent curating this person he hasn’t gotten to be out in the world and that person loves the socialization of a party, needs a few drinks to really get talking to people, but once he does it’s all so easy. Too easy almost and alcohol and cigarettes turn into much worse. The supernatural is sought out, he finds vampires, he realizes they both get something out of them biting him and the hole to Wonderland just never quite seems to end. It’s like that for years, some kind of barely controlled chaos. He goes out all night, he takes care of college under a fake name, he’s got dozens of them, he gets a degree in creative writing. But mostly he goes through France, he goes through London, he works retail to support his habits and he keeps moving, always moving, just a boy robbed of a proper childhood drowning in paranoia and liquor. Until he starts sinking his fangs into things for real, until he’s high enough one day to try it and the body pressed up against the wall, the partner he’d been kissing, tastes different. There’s the usual tang of metal but there’s something more, there’s this high that he’s never experienced before and when they kiss again, the blood is all he can taste. It all tastes different, the blood. He finds willing partners in bars, in corners of parties hosted by artsy friends he’s managed to keep. It feels good aside from the high to bite and feed like he thinks he was supposed to but the consequence of the high is the low that takes him from the top of the world, an apex predator, to a ball curled and shaking on the bathroom floor of his shitty apartment. He isn’t stupid, sheltered he might have been but he’s always been far more clever than anyone would give him credit for, he’s far more than an addict. He’s a writer, he’s a passionate person, he is handling himself. That’s what he tells himself in the mirror every day before he leans down to do a line off the counter. The bits and pieces of the supernatural world he’s weaseled his way into he loves. He applies what he knows of their politics, he realizes that technically he’s a halfblood, that it’s a wide category of people that are all in limbo, just like him. He’s stuck up for vampires, he’s stuck up for lycans, but ultimately he’s fought for himself, kept an eye on Cloe Omaira over the years and her constant campaign. There’s a brief period he gets better and he knows healing or addiction or whatever isn’t linear, but his recovery to relapse ratio, if put on a chart, would look like a fucking yo-yo on a string. Cloe Omaira, a young woman he’d met back home, becomes Senator Omaira while he’s in a bar in Berlin of all places and it’s probably the cocktail of drugs and alcohol in his system that really convinces him to pack his bags and go to Rome. Because Cloe is a friend, the only one he has ever really had and she’d done it. He goes and he cleans his act just enough to march into Canal Cakes with a resume that’s decorated in retail positions, freelance writing, and a long list of all the research he’s conducted on the supernatural over the years, all of the activism he could do under the radar. It is stupid, but he is passionate, he arguably is very good at talking himself in and out of things, all things considered. He gets the job, she needs marshals, he likes to think she is proud of him. “The fire was snuffed out by water that made the now burnt fabric cling to itself, made it heavy, made it darker. They were ruined, at least the left one. The right curtain was left unscathed, had been made to watch it’s counterpart wither. My mother fussed over them, but not me, not ever again. I never bothered them after that day. They were replaced, the grey now a sheer white that was tied back with a silver rope on either side. The old grey ones hang in my room now, more for show than anything. I couldn’t let them be disposed of. I go home, I lye in bed, and I can reach over and feel that tattered and charred edge of my own doing…”

He looks back on that paper, the recount of the day that the flame ate away at what was left of that lonely boy in that house. It’d gotten him a passing grade and warranted a trip to the school guidance counselor. Such was life. 

personality

+ sarcastic, passionate, analytical  – calculating, arrogant, stubborn

played by m. cst. she/her.

[acediting]

Nanowrimo 2 (another random bit from ALiTC universe)

Kai was starting to miss his bike. He could never fool anyone into thinking he liked any form of cold weather, and taking it through the mountain pass that was near chain conditions was nothing short of suicide, which was why he agreed so easily to Matilda’s offer to give him a ride to his next dueling arena, with the condition that he was ok with her taking a short detour for a possible job along the way. He was fine with that. In fact if he was being honest he was interested in this job of hers. Being a rookie duelist, he wasn’t expected to answer any calls when it came to rogue sightings, especially this far out of the Citadel’s radius. But Kai was no ordinary rookie, and Matilda was not just any veteran duelist and performer. He was one of the duelists that was expected to win the championship this year, which would offer him the official career that would require he hunt down rogues as one of the elites. Matilda had won that championship four times already, but every time turned it down, her reasoning always being so that she could take up the freelancing jobs in places like Riverbend, the city they were heading towards. So, this could be considered a win-win for the both of them. The problem was while he was riding shotgun the twins had been singing the lyrics to every song that came on the radio for the past two hours. They weren’t bad singers. Hell, they were the HypeTwins; most would probably pay to sit where he was right now. It was just too much at once. He pressed his forehead to the window, watching tree after snow covered tree pass by.

Matilda glanced at him from the driver’s seat, a playful smirk crossing her hot pink lips. “You better not get sick in my car.”

“SUV,” Kai corrected with a grunt, earning a roll of her eyes even as she turned her focus back to the road.

 “How much further to town?” she asked.

 At this, the twins in the back quieted their singing. Soon the music stopped as they ended their playlist to pull up the GPS. Ayu gave a small victory cheer. “We have a signal!” she declared before reading the map. “ETA….20 minutes!”

 “Oh! Good!” Matilda sighed. “I was beginning to think I’d have to park it behind a tree.”

 “We told you there was a rest stop thirty minutes ago,” Mizumi chided, sticking her head between the two front seats to get a better view of the people riding shotgun.

 “Yeah, but the snow was starting to come down and if we got stuck in something we’d miss the meeting for my client.”

 Mizumi pulled a face. “So, we’ll get a hotel and set up a defense base, while you go hunt the monsters.”

 “Rogues,” Kai corrected.

Mizumi stuck her tongue out at him. “They’re monsters.”

“Rogues~” Matilda chimed in.

Ayu shook her head. “You’ll never convince summoners otherwise.”

Mizumi sighed dramatically and flopped back into the back seat. “Why do I bother?”

Matilda giggled, glancing in the rearview mirror at the pair. “You know I love you both.”

“Of. Course.” They both halfheartedly replied in unison.

“Do you both rehearse that?” Kai asked, genuinely curious.

“Do you and Jayjay?” Ayu asked.

Kai shrugged at the mention of his younger brother. “Sometimes?” Ayu replied by snapping her fingers and pointing at him. He shook his head and resumed looking out the window as the others continued to chat. Matilda would probably ask him to hang out at the hotel with the twins. Unlike Matilda and himself, they were exclusively hypemen, which meant they were powerful little ladies in their own right, but never used their abilities for combat. Rather, they honed their skills to pull the energy from the air, created by the buzz and excitement of a hyped up crowd before a duel, then powered the arena itself with all the safety measures needed. It was taxing work, and dangerous. With so much power used they could become magnets for the very rogues the duelists were hunting. But one perk of a duelist was that they had to master barriers for their domes. If they were good, like the twins were, they could place up protective barriers that could last for hours, maybe even days depending, and keep themselves safe until help arrived. Likely as soon as they got to the hotel they would set one up in the room, order some room service and camp out for the night.

Kai reasoned that it would make sense for him to be there, beyond his need to at least seem somewhat normal to keep his cover from behind blown. Matilda had worked hard to make sure he and Jay- though raising flags- did not raise the wrong flags. Plus if anything did come for the girls he could be right there to help them while Matilda was away. That would definitely make sure the lot of them were at ease.

…Except he had that itch in the back of his mind. It was annoying, nagging, and one he had grown accustomed to over the years. It was like he had something right on the verge of his mind, a fact that he knew, but couldn’t quite grasp in that annoying brain fart kind of way. It was a sensation he got whenever trouble was about to come knocking, his senses that had yet to fully develop  and clamped down by the seals wrapped up and down his arms unable to fully decipher what it was. What he did know is that the last time he had this sensation a king rogue had arrived in an arena during one of his dules, and he wound up getting a name for himself for taking on one of the most powerful types of rogues nearly single handed. Jay was on stage that night and also got into a lot of trouble, being forced to buzz down and hide away in the capital so that the king that got away lost his scent. It was a hard learned lesson to not ignore that little voice in his head.

 “Cassa to Kai!”

 Kai blinked and turned his attention back to Matilda with a grunt of acknowledgement.

 “We should be getting to town soon. Where will you be heading?”

 “I can’t go to the meeting?” Kai asked, knowing the answer.

 “Not unless you want your dueling license revoked,” she answered.

 “And after?”

 “Well, if you happen to be walking around with me and I happen to find the problem…”

 “I’ll be close by then,” he replied.

 Matilda grinned, “I thought you’d say that.” She turned the car around a bend, the trees almost instantly giving way. She squinted against the sudden sunlight, then blinked a few more times rapidly. “Woah.”

 Kai followed her gaze, his brows furrowing for a moment, before raising up beneath his brown bangs. Woah was right. Before them was Riverbend, which was a city that, according to reports, had plans to expand considerably from a mid sized city into Cassa’s next metropolis. Unfortunately, twenty years back that was put to a quick stop when one of the titans, a non-rogue but still dangerous entity, passed through and turned the first batch of skyscrapers, barely started on their construction, to ruins. That was twenty years ago, and yet as they looked out at the city the twisted and tilted metal framework of the ruined constructs could be seen on the city’s edge, surrounded by buildings that looked half sunk and left to time before their dusty remains gave way to a city that seemed to have a fondness for parks and greenery.

 “Why would they leave those up?” Mizumi asked, eyeing what the pair did.

 Matilda frowned. “I have no idea.”

 “Could be influenced by that thing…” Kai offered, somewhat distracted and feeling numb as he took in the view before him. “If it’s using the town as a hunting ground then it would need a lair. People won’t go near there.”

 “Makes sense,” Mizumi replied slowly.

 Matilda gave Kai a questioning look, but decided against what she was going to ask. “Well, I’m not going in there until I know what the client knows. And I’m not risking something powerful enough to keep people from wanting to take care of THAT getting even a remote whiff of you girls outside of a dome. Hotel first.” She accelerated, but not before giving Kai another pointed stare. She had questions, he knew, but it was better to wait until the twins were packed away. This might take more explaining about things that the twins weren’t privy to, nor ready to hear about. If they thought rogues and natural spirits were the only types of supernatural and magical beings about, then they were in good company with the rest of Cassa.

So he stayed quiet as Matilda drove through the streets, counting the seconds as he inhaled, held his breath in, and exhaled. It kept his pulse steady and allowed him to keep his expression schooled, calm and passive as they passed a park filled with green trees and shrubs with a bridge that crossed a narrow part of the river that the city was named for. This led to a street that was lined with shops with colorful store fronts. At the edge of the city this marketplace had managed to keep its small town feel. Kai found himself wondering whether this might have actually been an outdoor market at one point in thime that had slowly gone the way of storefronts as the city grew. He might ask one of the shop owners. Might.

 Once they were through it was only a few blocks into the city before they arrived at the hotel, some four star that had made its way there back when the city was expected to expand and never really left. The twins were quick to grab the luggage, promising to order Kai and Matilda some food and send them the room numbers before heading into the building. Matilda watched them as they entered the sliding doors and made their way to the reception desk. Then her attention swiveled to Kai. “That thing?”

 Kai nodded, his attention still on the window. “It’s not a rogue.”

 Her brows furrowed. “Okay…I’ll bite. What is it?”

 “I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “It could be a specter. Maybe something sinister. All I know is that there are no rogues that attack and feed like that thing does.” He suppressed a shiver, pulling his jacket a little tighter closed.

Matilda regarded him, her expression growing more serious even as her voice held a tone of disbelief. “Have you seen this thing?”

 Kai was silent for a moment. Then, slowly, he replied. “I have.” He finally turned to face her. “I lived here when I was a child. It haunted me until the day I left.”