#but like. i get why they didnt. he is grieving.

[transphilza]

tis missin techno hours it seems

[nomairuins]

i wish there was a way for me to likeee. semi change this one thingin this one mod. but 1 im not a modder 2 i feel like thats disrespectful. i just want sort of an inbetween between the game and this mod but that is not a thing that exist... sigh

[brackenfur]

i still think it should have been like. ashfur and brambleclaw were friends as apprentices - ashpaw was always showing him around, teaching him some more advanced apprentice things, talking all day every day and sleeping in the nest next to one another - until brindleface dies. and when bramblepaw goes to comfort his friend, walks across camp to tell him how sorry he is - ashpaw just. stares. at him until he walks away. and bramblepaw is like....well he's grieving, i need to give him space. i get it.

but it keeps happening. ashpaw wont talk to him anymore, barely looks at him. moves to the other side of the apprentices den and starts spending more time with thornpaw. and deep down, even as an apprentice - bramblepaw knows its because of tigerstar, even if firestar and his mother tell him it's not, that ashpaw is just in pain right now. fernpaw is still his friend, after all. but ashpaw is never as close to him anymore. and then they become warriors, and ashfur only exchanges a few words here and there with him, but it's never the same as it was. sorrelpaw and brightheart and others will be like "hey, what happened to you guys?" and brambleclaw knows the answer - he kinda thinks everyone does - but he just will shrug and say "i guess we just grew apart. it happens sometimes."

and the thing is - ashfur knows that it's not technically right to feel this way, that brambleclaw didnt actually do anything. but hes so angry, knowing what happened to his mother. how she died. how brambleclaw's father did that to her and everyone just goes on with life like brindleface wasnt even there. he just cant stop being angry, even if it's not a burning sort of rage anymore, more dull - he still just doesnt want to have anything to do with brambleclaw.

and then hawkfrost and mothwing suddenly are there, and ashfur gets this weird feeling when he sees hawkfrost at gatherings, sees how close he and brambleclaw are. he knows that squirrelflight and brambleclaw are friends - or something, who knows - and he casually just mentions it, just to see if she thinks its weird too. squirrelflight is so outspoken, after all - and bam, she thinks the exact same thing. she thinks hawkfrost is a little much, that there's something not quite right with him. that nothing good could come out of being close with him, and ashfur feels oddly seen. they start talking and hanging out more, squirrelflight doesnt want anything to do with brambleclaw either, and like-

bam. suddenly squirrelflight is on brambleclaw's side again. suddenly they're talking again and ashfur just cant stand it. it feels like hes the only one who sees that there's something wrong with brambleclaw, that brambleclaw is power hungry. that hes manipulative and that he's not safe to be around, but squirrelflight wont hear it. shes almost disgusted, really.

so he sets brambleclaw up - he uses hawkfrost, thinking it's kinda two birds with one stone - he was right about both of them, he thinks as hawkfrost all too eagerly decides to trap firestar in the foxtrap. and ashfur lingers behind just to see, just for proof, and he sees it: he sees brambleclaw hesitate. he sees the way brambleclaw's eyes flicker to the foxtrap, how he freezes up. he thought about doing it, about killing firestar.

and having ashfur be so self-righteous and feeling vindicated about it, and THATS why he hates brambleclaw/squirrelflight so much....i dunno man.

[nessieartss]

So I have to ask, in your jjk sibling AU….how close were Sukuna and grandpa? And how did the siblings deal with his death together? I just have to know 😭

Anon, why did you do this to me 😭 anyway, yes sukuna was close with his grandpa just like yuuji. But apparently his grandpa didnt like it when sukuna was going through his "emo phase" and would often smack him in his head while saying, "you look like a sewer rat that just barely escaped a house fire." Yuuji would laugh his ass off and he gotta admit the look didnt suit sukuna at all.

Okay, so, this is gonna be hard. Yuuji was the first one to cry when they heard the news from the hospital. Sukuna, on the other hand, was too shock to handle the news that he didnt know how to react. He busied himself helping their parents for the funeral preparation, telling other family members about the news. He suppresed down all the emotions while also tried to calm yuuji down. I think he's the type to look strong in front of the others while still trying to process what just happened.

But then it all came crashing down like waves for sukuna the next day. He broke down, couldnt sleep, spent the entire day in his room, only came out to eat and didnt even talk that much. Yuuji, while still grieving, tried to knock on his room to check up on him. They talked awkwardly on the door frame, sukuna just looked so tired that yuuji thought he would eat him alive if he tried to take another step into his room.

But surprisingly, sukuna allowed him. Yuuji sitting himself down on his computer chair, while sukuna laying down in his bed, face staring at the ceiling. They talked about their days first, all the "how are you" just beating around the bush untill finally their grandpa. They reminisced all their happy moments, and yuuji could see that sukuna was trying really hard not to cry in front of him. They talked for 2 hours but most of it just filled with silence.

Yuuji then told sukuna to take a rest, in which sukuna replied with a mumbled thanks. It took them both days to finally processed the grieving and getting back up on their feet again.

[stevie-petey]

Hi! I know it's pretty late to be asking this but I got a random blurb idea at three in the morning so I thought I'd send it in before I forgot it. It's for season one, episode 5/6.

After Steve finds Jonathan and Nancy in her bed and tells bug she deserves better he drives off with Tommy and Carol. Basically his POV that whole car ride. He's grieving, in disbelief and heartbreak. He's angry and sad, not only for himself but for bug. Tommy and Carol are only riling him up at this point. Remember how Tommy or Carol said something like " wow Steve you're right she really is pathetic to still stay with him" maybe we see the convo where that came from. I feel like he was excited to be around who he thought were Nancy's friends outside of barb, and it all came crashing down.

Again this is really random and super late but I was just thinking about season one Steve and this scenario popped into my head. For being such a little shit Steve really is handsome.

i loooove this idea omg yes ! n never apologize for sending blurbs i love doin em

enjoy <3

"did henderson really defend that creep?" carol practically throws herself over the drivers seat in disbelief of what steve has just said.

"she did." steve tightens his hands around the steering wheel. his mind is reeling. hes hurt, hes so fucking hurt, and hes angry. for you, for what nancy has done to him, for what jonathan has done to you. for years youve been his little pet, always doting on the boy, and he still has the fucking nerve to hurt you like this. "shes pathetic."

the words burn steves tongue. he regrets them immediately.

tommy snorts. "i mean, yeah. shes hot, but at least have some self respect, ya know?"

the boys words only cause steve to tighten his grip on the steering wheel harder. youre not pathetic; youre selfless. youre so fucking selfless and always see the good in people. it infuriates steve. youre everything and more, and hes seen people abuse this rare kindness for years. make fun of you for it, mock you as if the kindness you bring isnt a breath of fresh air for everyone.

he hears a yelp next to him and steve knows that carol has slapped tommy for calling another girl hot in front of her.

"i just dont get it," steve sighs out. theres so much he wants to ask, to say and plead and demand. he cant get the betrayal in your eyes out of his head. youd looked devasted when hed told you what he saw at nancys. how jonathan had been wrapped around her.

and yet even as the hurt crossed upon your face, you still managed to swallow down the hurt and see the good in people.

in the people who didnt fucking deserve it.

"fuck if i know, man." tommy rubs at his arm and glares at carol.

she simply rolls her eyes at him and goes back to picking at her nails. "why do we assume she even knows how to do anything other than put on that angelic act bullshit?"

"what, like she doesnt know how to be mean?" tommy asks, furrowing his brows.

steve stares straight ahead. "all shes ever been is kind."

"exactly," carol throws herself against the drivers seat again. "whos to say its real? not some creepy act? better yet: how do we know shes not, like, fucked up in the head?"

youre not. steve has seen your intelligence. youre the top of your class and hes had to shamefully ask you for help with english homework.

tommy frowns again. "wait, i thought she was smart."

"god, youre dumb." carol shakes her head. "what i mean is, what if she physically incapable of being mean. like, some chemical imbalance in her brain."

"could explain her freakish devotion to byers." tommy says.

steves grip tightens once more hearing the boys name. jonathan byers. resident creep who somehow has captured the heart of hawkins sweetheart. the same boy who has now cheated on her with steves girlfriend.

he will never understand this.

nancy has hurt him, shes abandoned him like everyone else has, and he knows that somehow its his fault.

but you? you dont deserve any of this.

what carol has said makes sense. maybe you really dont know how to be mean. if youre physically incapable of it, then steve decides that he has to do something about it.

if you need to be mean, then he'll be mean for you.

[cupiohearts]

DONT DISTURB THE DEAD ?! - gun, dg, goo with came back from the dead! s/o (gn)

a/n : THE WOMAN, THE MAN THEMSELF IS BACK

you were someone so memorable to GUN. he hadnt realized back then how much he loved but once you had left it was like a piece of him had just vanished. your reappearance felt like ascension.

gun admired you from the very beginning. in fact your fighting prowess was the entire reason you got scouted in the first place. it was unfortunate that you left them all behind. he grieved for months.

at first he was unsure what he felt in the first place. the reason why everytime he went out for a smoke, he recalled every moment when you would take it out of his mouth and stomp it. telling him he would die early and he would banter back and say that he already would.

he missed the small chuckles whenever you got drunk and would tell him an embarassing memory of when you were younger.

so when he saw you again all of his months in confusion had left him a final answer. he loved you.

you were different from back then (of course so it's been 5 years). you were more confident then back then, your face got more matured over the years and you wore a stoic look.

but he could still tell that it was you. the way that you had widened your eyes upon seeing him, he could find himself staring at every feature of you that he oh so dearly missed.

"i found you again..." the end of his words were let out breathlessly. the tension was heavy and you both stood there waiting for another word.

he found himself waiting for another word to hear what the sound of his future would be.

but for now he could deal with the talking stage. maybe he can once again earn all of your love and maybe he might become your man.

GOO was an eccentric person to day the least. you were once his right hand in command, following him everywhere like a baby duck. the most unfortunate part of that tale was that baby ducks get lost easily.

heavy breath filled the air, you heaved in everything you could. eyes were bloodshot as you went on the adrenaline all that was in your mind was keep running and dont stop.

you couldnt even hear anyone behind you, rushing past a group of people that opened up a path for you. in your mind it went into your old instinct where it said to find goo.

you missed him dearly, he probably did too. after being trapped inside a dungeon hell, you knew you needed to find him. your instinct had also told you that he would be there for you. it was never wrong.

"y/n?!"

a familar voice ringed in your ear. it made you stop running and look around. to search for the familar face before you caught him. he spotted you and hugged you so tight you couldnt breath, but you didnt want to let go even if it killed you.

you missed his loud laughs, you missed being able to make snarky comments at his frankly dumb ones. he was what you needed most.

the hug went on for so long. you released yourself from his grasps and took a look at his face.

"thank you for being here"

DG liked to say that he was a professional man and that he would never ever fall in love. or atleast thats what he would like to believe is the image of himself. falling in love with you was the best and worst thing to happen to him.

his mind was forever haunted by the memory of your face when you fell. your face looked haunted, the wind blew all the hair in front of your face and you fell. he didn't know what happened next, all that he could remember was screaming when he saw your body become tinier and tinier with a splash into the cold ocean.

for the next month he was traumatized by your face. lashing out at anyone who mentioned your name. overtime he gradually begun to accept that your were gone, the sleepless nights wondering if you were alive were all merely delusions.

but this- this couldnt be procured from his mind.

the image of you looked older than the one you originally had when you were younger. in all of his hallucinations of you, you looked the same as you were younger.

slowly he reached his hand to feel your skin. it was warm and lifelike. your eyes flickered up to his and with a smile you said "im back"

a tight hug on you had ended your sentence and you smiled in his arms. "its alright, i'm back" you patted his back. dg couldn't respond to you but he forever remembered your picture.

he didnt care how you survived, because youre here now. you were here now and it might be selfish of him to say but he wanted to keep you here forever.

"dont leave me again please" you laughed at this and nodded. tracing the words.

i will love you forever.

[actualbird]

hi zak!!! deliriously asking this at 5am, but don't you ever think about every time marius (and i guess that whole von hagen family in that sense) celebrates his own birthday is he reminded about his mother's death? like... the way you share birthday with your mother's death anniversary.... haha how does that go............

first of all, I HOPE U WENT TO SLEEP AFTER SENDING THIS MESSAGE!!!

second of all, AUUUUUUUUGGGGHH //wailing in agony

i have thought about it in passing and it hurts my heart....frankly i think marius, once hes old enough to understand what happened (and also old enough to be blamed for what happened) (which...wasnt very old at all, he was still a child) takes it hardest. of course, giann and austin grieve, but i like to think that because theyre older (and thus more mature and capable of compartmentalizing) that their grief for carenina is separate from their joy of having marius in their lives. it wasnt a "deal" or a "trade" in their minds and in their hearts.

for marius though, it is. he sees the beginning of his very existence inherently tied to the death of his mother. he sees his existence as a sick "trade" by the universe; lose someone you love and gain a child thats a burden and a reminder of who you lost. hes much harder on himself, and i think thats partly because he never got to meet his mother, so he didnt get to experience how excited she was for his birth, he didnt get to experience first hand how much he was loved by her even before he was born. giann and austin got to experience this, and, even with all the bumps in the road, they continue this love for marius. in a way, it's a form of remembrance too. but marius had it different. what he knew was once upon a time there was a perfect family, and then he came along, and grief loomed over them like a shadow theyll never be rid of. marius feels like he was a thief. marius feels like he stole life of his mother.

semi-related: i actually have an hc that marius' mother did not die during childbirth (and thus not on marius' birthday), because canon never confirmed that it was during. instead, canon just said that the strain of giving birth was too much for her deteriorating health, so it's not without the realm of possibility that carenina lived for a few months after childbirth before passing away.

why i have this hc is because:

1 ) i hc she was the one who gave the nickname "king". she'd whisper it to him delightedly, boop his little nose and tease him for being a pampered little baby, calling him "my little king" as she cared for him in her last days.

2 ) i just want carenina to have met marius, even if marius cant ever remember it. i just think it would be nice, and that it would be fitting. one of the last moments she had was cradling her beloved son in her arms, and she was at peace when she went

she was full of love and had no regrets. to her, this wasnt a "trade" either. this was her choice, and she was glad to have made that choice.

but of course, marius cant remember the experience, and he thinks otherwise. to him, being born was his first sin among many.

[saturnxlust]

Sighhhh this is a shit post cause i have nothing else to do🫶🫶

John Marston x Fem!Reader

Hes a interesting lover

He isnt that bad but hes not like amazing

I imagine he was a good dad for the most part to john but i dont think he’d want another kid

If you do he might just shove jack in your arms and let you take care of him for awhile

Jack is a sweetheart though🫶🫶

I dont think abigal could really complain about their marriage other then the fact he ran away for about a year and constantly left for days at a time without telling anyone

If you have a problem with that he might just shrug and offer to take you with him

But if you decline and ask him to stay home with you hes not too keen on it

Most of the time its usually missions dutch sends him on that take days but there have been a few occasions where they take a week

When everything went bad with the gang at the bank his first priority was you and jack

He wanted to get you out of this life and run away like he had before blackwater

He knew everyone would be counting on him and arthur to keep dutch sane though so he begrudgingly stayed

When arthur, dutch, javier, and micah go missing its chaos

He goes practically insane not knowing what to do

He also heavily mourns the loss of his “adopted” father hosea

He shuts down almost completely and relies on you for almost everything

Most of his days are spent in his cot wishing for them to come back, that is until you join him

He gets distracted by you almost enough to forget hes lost his 2 father figures and his older brother figure

Micah he doesnt really care about, never understand why the man was so sour all the time

Javier he misses, mostly wanting him to be at the camp to bring everyones spirts up by playing a song

Secretly sings one of javiers songs while working by himself

When they finally come back hes never been happier, but while he was slumped in bed he was imagining hosea would come back with them and that they had grabbed his body to keep him alive

When thats not the case he cries

Genuine tears fall from his eyes that night as he holds you and goes through the grieving process all over again

It took some words of encouragement from arthur to get him up and moving the next day

When dutch and micah flee leaving arthur and him and a few others to deal with their attackers

He doesnt let you out of his sight

Not wanting you to get hit in the crossfire

Once everything was over and you all were safe again he never left your side and his hands stayed on you at all costs

He feels like if he isnt holding you and constantly around you then something will happen

When evrything goes bad and arthur dies? Oh god

You thought he was bad before

Hes awful now

He starts crying as soon as he finds out and if your off doing something he immediately seeks your comfort

Walking up to you and holding you while he cries into your shoulder is the only thing he knows to do right now

When he eventually calms a little hes gone

Lost almost completely

Theres not much you can say without him breaking down again so you decide to be silent

Holding him and running your hands through his hair

He falls to his knees infront of you and his arms wrap around your wait as he cries into your stomach

His hat is long gone somewhere but it didnt matter to him

All that mattered is that his best friend and brother was dead and there was nothing he could do

He wished arthur had told him sooner

He wished he had read the signs after micah began calling him black lung

He wished he had gotten arthur medicine

Even if it wouldnt have helped much it wouldve done something

And then the anger sets in

He gets up abruptly and walks away

Beginning to throw and punch things, nothing at you

Not even close to you

He screams and curses micah and dutches names

Feeling betrayed by those he once called his family

Once the anger leaves he breaks down again

Sobbing and shaking as he reaches out for you, silently begging you to do something to fix this

You just walked over and held him in your arms, letting him fall asleep against you

The last thing you remember seeing is him snoring softly in your arms as you leaned against a tree

Falling asleep yourself after being so tired of being on the run

God knows what happened to the rest and may god keep them safe is the last thought that rings through your head before you fall asleep with john pressed against you

Oh my god i didnt realize how in depth i went with his grief😭😭

[dsaf-confessions]

some of yall arent as serious about this flipside gang found family shit as i am. when i say the flipside gang is found family, I MEAN ALL OF THEM!! dave and steven are like older brothers to dee, dave and steven bicker like cousins at a family reunion. oh, x and y didnt get along in game? you're wrong! excluding jack, all of them had like at least one month to get to know each other before they went to the afterlife. they put aside their differences! thats what the game is about!! they put their differences aside and, albeit hard, FORGAVE EACH OTHER!! even though some of their actions were inexcusable, they were all victims of henry in their own way. THATS WHY THE FACT THAT THEY BEAT UP HENRY IN THE END IS SO IMPORTANT. YEAH THE CUTSCENE IS KINDA FUNNY BUT THEY ACKNOWLEDGED WHO'S FAULT IT REALLY WAS IN THE END!!! TOGETHER THEY LEARNED TO LOVE AGAIN THEY LEARNED THEY COULD HAVE FAMILY!!!! BLACKJACK IS MORE THAN JUST THE PET OF THE FOUND FAMILY CREW TOO!!! HES HIS OWN GUY DONT TELL ME YOU WOULDN'T BECOME YOUR FAVOURITE ANIMAL TOO!! HE HAS INDIVIDUALITY SEPARATE FROM JACK!! IT WASNT JUST DEE PETER DAVE STEVEN AND BLACKJACK EITHER THEY ALL CARED ABOUT JACK TOO AND THEY ALL GRIEVED WHEN HE COULDNT GO WITH THEM BUT THEY LEARNED TO MOVE ON TOGETHER!!! THEY NEED EACH OTHER

.

[lovingeddiediaz]

9-1-1 rant. I have a lot of mixed feelings about this season and a lot of them aren’t good. Love this show, I’ve been watching live since season 3 but yikes that finale was a mess imo definitely one of my least favorites for sure. Very underwhelming. The whole season in general was wacky.

I’ve been feeling this way for at least 2 seasons now. I feel like 911 has been trying to fit these LARGE stories that they don’t have time for or are failing to make time for in these episodes. I get that this season was shortened, but if they can’t properly flush out a story in time, they should figure something else out instead of simplifying it and cutting out so many parts that it loses the build up and the emotion and captivation.

So much happens off screen that I feel like should be SHOWN. like we didn’t get to see Chris upset in the moment when he saw the Shannon lookalike, the scene cut out after he said mom. All we see is just him in his bed telling Eddie to go away later. We didn’t see the confrontation with Marisol and Eddie and her leaving, just an offhand comment of her not coming back later. We didn’t see the phone call that had Buck rushing over. We didnt get to see Eddie at his house alone after Chris leaves, just him leaving with his grandparents and boom, cut scene. We didn’t get to see hen or Chim at Bobby’s bedside.

We don’t get to see the aftermath of ANYTHING. The show keeps cutting the scenes just short and it has been pissing me off so much. They’re missing out on so much depth bc they’re doing too goddamn much at once and too quick.

All action, no build up or payoff. Just one thing after another. You don’t even have time to let your emotions settle and follow the characters bc it’s over so soon. You don’t get to worry and grieve alongside the characters. Bobby almost died and then boom he’s fine again like nothing happened. Like what am I supposed to be emotional over? He almost died in the desert just a couple episodes before that and then he was fine, no mention of it again.

Idk it seems like this show has been doing a lot of telling instead of showing when it comes to what are supposed to be emotionally charged scenes, like Buck saying how he was worried he was gonna lose Bobby but we didn’t really see that. All we got was a teary eye when Buck told Eddie he was in the hospital. Didn’t get to see the team actually save bathena in the beginning, so seeing them get the medals held no weight, like cool we’re told they saved them but we didn’t see shit. We didn’t get to see any of the madney wedding buildup like picking flower arrangements and a venue and dress/tuxedo shopping or anything like that, just assume off screen obviously XD

Buck’s sexuality arc being reduced to background noise also sucks. He kissed a man and then they said ok cool good enough moving on now. Not even bothering to deepen/develop his relationship with Tommy (are they even together or are they still going on dates?? No fuckin clue lmao), instead of a meaningful conversation between them in the finale it’s turned into a sexual joke like come ON, besides the first kiss and the second kiss that Buck initiates, their scenes are meaningless imo and that’s sad bc I was so excited for this storyline in the beginning but again, there’s nothing there. No substance.

And don’t even get me started on henren’s storyline. How many times are they gonna recycle the ‘person gets in the way of henren expanding their family’ bullshit before they finally get creative and think of something new? What is that, 3 times now? It’s just annoying at this point lmao I’m over it.

Why is Tim so against happy storylines? I know he said something along the lines of people wouldn’t watch if the characters were happy, but I think that’s bullshit. If you can’t captivate an audience with positive stories then I think you have a skill issue. Big drama and angst doesn’t equal good story telling and writing. Couldn’t even give madney a nice wedding like wtf.

Idk. I hope next season is thought out better.

[cowchickenbeefpork]

Ummm thoughts about Ed’s NPD and BPD? Interested to hear especially after reading your fic

AAAAA THANK YOU FOR READING IT!!!!! with my worldview of Ed having both I feel like his NPD is more prominent and noticeable, it's his first go-to when it comes to his defenses even if he is hiding it (aka season one, I would say he is more overt in his narcissistic vulnerability while covert in his grandiosity in that season, he flip flops around a lot in his presentation on his narcissism in the series buttttt from what I can remember he goes back and forth from hiding his grandiosity but not hiding his vulnerability to hiding his vulnerability but not his grandiosity.) his bpd came first to me, and since most people dont like those traits and he often gets maniuplated for them, he tries to repress it and focus on his narcissism. his npd also keeps him from splitting on himself more often too, both borderlines and narcissists often times see everything as either good or bad, you either are all good or your all bad, which is why treatment is often very hard for both of these groups because no one is all good or all bad. this is why narcissists try to avoid anything that shows a flaw in how they view themselves, they cannot have done a bad thing, since doing a bad thing means they are a bad person, their defenses are more stable and hard to overcome than a borderlines because of this.

i think a easy way to tell is how people with npd and people with bpd split. since npd is more so focused on the self and maintaining the ego, theres three catergories of viewing relationships instead of just two. the first one is someone to perform to, someone to get easy praise from and being able to keep your self essteem in check so you can still feel good about yourselves ( i dont think i need to state here that narcissistss dont actually love themselves, only the image they are trying to contain, this kind of splitting can also be seeing the person theyre performing for as a equal but its not really close, its more superficial ). the two other types are more devaluing, the second kind of narcisstic splitting is seeing someone as someone to inghore, someone who just does not get it and is too stupid too ever get it, the thrid one is the most simliar to borderline splitting since it sees the other as a predator, someone trying to sabotage and hurt them and trying to vitcimize them.

bpd splitting is more so focused on the other, seeing them as someone who is just perfect and you want to know everything about them and always make them happy and how they're just perfect, to them being someone being an abuser manipulator who never cared or loved them in the first place. both of these kinds of splitting are similar in structure but still different, narcissism still mostly focuses on the self while borderline focuses more on the other, narcissism as a defense mechanism is more so focused on the superficial while borderline is more focused on the personal.

when you apply this logic to how ed splits on people, then you kinda start to see this way of performing to keep his ego in check just does not apply to how he treated oswald! his attempts to please him and to help him were exteremly self sacfricial and often put his life on the line! he didnt need to do all of this for oswald to get oswald's praise and admiration, what he does for oswald is more simliar to a borderline wanting to do anything for their favorite person and showcase how much they care for them than a narcissist thinking they met an equal which brings their self essteem up! in the end of how the riddler got his name ed said he based his whole self worth on oswald, and instead of letting himself grieve normally, he tells himself he doesnt need anyone anymore and that hes fine now. the narcissism took over, it didnt even let him fully grieve. he didnt see oswald as just someone to bring his ego up like he did with kristen he didnt reduce oswald's existence to just that, oswald was the only person who ever loved or cared for him and was this amazing figure who ended up being someone who never actually loved him and was only using him in ed's eyes.

i would argue his relationship with lee was more so borderline too, she was the only person he was close to and was the only person who could take his shit during that whose collapse of his ego. he genuinely cared for her and was willing to kill himself out of paranoia he would hurt her! that is not narcissism, he did have narcissistic intentions with their relationship at the start of season four, but it changes into the codependency similarly to what he had with Oswald, only this time being a bit more one sided

That's why ed sticks to his narcissistic defenses more, because, to Ed, this is the only way you can love someone! you can only ever fully love someone if you would basically cut off your whole arm for them just to give them a gift, there are no boundaries! if he only acts selfish in his relationships then he will end up killing them like he did with Kristen too, so as a cope he pretends he doesn't want or desire close relationships during the later seasons, trying to paint himself as a cold logician just so he can have some admiration and praise and love but only from a distance since he knows if he gives too much, something like what happened with Oswald might happen again, and if he takes too much, something like what happened with Kristen might happen again. an Oswald will lead him into being weak and dumb, and a Kristen will lead him into being a monster who only exists to leech off and hurt others. if he just doesn't date then he can never experience either event again and can brush them off like they say nothing about him.

IDK if this whole thread makes any lick of sense, I don't think he was being borderline with Kristen but I do think he realized she was a real person with her own beliefs and opinions only after he killed her, which caused him to panic and repress any guilt or grief he had for the incident and convince himself it was no one's fault and was just destined to happen. Edward is terrible at accepting he did something awful or has emotions and needs, so he represses whatever he feels that conflicts with the image he has of himself and thinks that will be his permanent solution when it always fails him after a few months. he basically ignores and represses his borderline until he finds someone who seems like they are amazing to him which is just. kinda explodes all over the place I AM SO SORRY THAT HIS WHOLE EXPLANATION SUCKS ASS I HOPE I MADE MYSELF CLEAR ASK QUESTIONS IF I WAS UNCLEAR!!!!

[girltigerclaw]

breaking into ur house rn

top ten characters and bottom ten. reasons are optional

I just finished this chart thing i think i actually stole from your blog a few months ago <3 Slightly edited to my own prefs.

If anyone wants the template check the reblogs, and feel free to add you own. I'd love to see. I'm just rambling under here:

Leafpool: She is more special and sacred than the virgin mary. She has everything. Daughter of the first protagonist, ex boyfriend for me to hate, TONS of wlw situationships<3, a lifetime of tragedy, and some of the most gorgeous canon art to exist.

Crookedstar: Crookedstar is a trans woman to me. Her life is genuinely just so tragic and fucked, I love it. The erins asked: “How much truama, death and misfortune can you fit into a single cat?” and then they wrote Crookedstar’s promise.

Tawnypelt: GIRLS WHO HATE THEIR FATHERS. The erins dont love her like I do.

Tallstar: I love old men… I fucking love seeing older characters and how much they’ve changed from their younger selves. Tallstar is considered one of, if not the most peaceful leader in the clans. But also when he was like 19 he went on a quest to fucking murder a guy :3

Cloudstar: I rlly do not care abt anyone in Skyclan(I like Leafstar but she's not a fav yknow?) Cloudstar... he was based as fuck. Why did Starclan get away with this shit for real??

Scourge: It’s fucking Scourge. He’s awesome

Briarlight: I’m disabled and I love her. She has such a consistent fun, sweet personality and she makes me happy!!<3

RavenBarley: It deserves all the attention and hype it gets. Though I wish mlm ships didn’t overshadow wlw ones in this fandom, RavenBarley is genuinely well written and makes me very emotional even if the publisher didnt allow it to be explicitly canon.

CrookedBlue: TRANS WOMEN CROOKEDSTAR YURI. Two leaders having a forbidden relationship and kits is way more interesting than Oakheart. The angst of Crooked and Blue sitting next to eachother every gathering while the entire forest has their eyes on them. Don’t look for too long, don’t let the mourning slip into your voice. You have to pretend your lover is a stranger. You… have become strangers. You can never be together again. You're enemies now. This is what we wanted, isn’t it? …We’ll never be happy again.

Mothwing: Her novella delving into her relationship with Hawkfrost was so good and heartbreaking.

Heathertail: Daughter of leader, sister of a major villian, and former love interest of a protagonist! Why did she fall off the second po3 ended. She’s shown to be very compassionate and willing to put her own feelings aside for the sake of others. Would’ve honestly prefered her as a mate to Lionblaze or get a pov herself over the nothing we got.

Blackstar: *Murders an elderly woman trying to stop me from kidnapping children. Supports a dictator openly abusing/neglecting children and the elderly. Murders a man for refusing to kill mixed raced children- then tells said man’s sister that she will never be safe.* Man…. i sure do feel bad for abusing and killing all of those people…. Good thing I will face no consequences and proceed to be made leader, where I will have even more power over the wellbeing of others.

I hate. This guy.

The New Prophecy: A classic. My first series was actually tnp! i feel more attached to first arc cats tho, if you couldn't already tell by my list lmao

Johanna Map- Best Tawnypelt content out there

BlueQuince: My personal handcrafted, homemade Yuri. Bluefur feels terrible about Tiny going missing and promises Quince she’ll help her find him. They never did, but they had a very… fleeting but intimate relationship. Quince is grieving and Bluefur feels so overwhelmed by the duties in her clan. They’ve always thought of eachother since but never met again.

Tigerclaw: My name sake<3 The angst of his earlier life is so, so facinating to me. Starclan being straight fucked up and decided killing him is their only option? He was a kid and they saw him as a lost cause from the start. They never tried any other methods, never tried to steer him in the right direction or… even just take it into their own hands and kill him themself, which they have SHOWN they’re capable of.

They watched all the the horrific crimes he commited, entirely aware they were going to happen. Thats. Fucking. Horrifying. Starclan is scary as shit… and his death? FANTASTIC. I only wish he’d gotten lives from cats he killed so that him coming back to life to suffer over and over was an actual curse from Starclan and not blessings. They knew how he would die and they gave him the lives to torture him for his sins…

Flywhisker: Adhd girlies. Painfully relate to that feeling of the constant scolding for never being “good enough” because I prefer to do things a certain way or struggle to focus. So, SO happy for her when she left the clans! You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone! Hope she’s happy and warm indoors with her brother💕

(P.S. I was very suprised to find she actually had an official art piece!)

Bluestar: Get behind me women with mental disorders. I will defend you. Beautifully complex and tragic character, my favorite written in the series. Literally can't think of a single other female character in handled as seriously and with the complexity of Bluestar. (Although her super edition was a bit of an L with how others treated her, it ultimately makes her breakdown even more painful.)

Exile from Shaodwclan: Nightstar my beloved! He's such a great guy. The rightful leader of Shadowclan, always and forever.

Ravenpaw's Farewell: HE DIED IN BARLEY'S ARMS, TELLING HIM HE WILL FIND HIM, NO MATTER WHERE HE IS. FUCK.

Crookedstar art: So beautiful. I genuinely think she's one of the prettiest cats in the series. This along with her official art by Wayne Mcloughlin.

Leopardstar: As a kid I hated her and loved Blackfoot, now I hate Blackfoot and love her. #feminism. But seriously I think she has way more going for her than he ever has. Her father is a medicine cat who hates violence, the DRASTIC change in Riverclan's view of outsiders upon Crookedstar's death and her leadership. Her already having a position of power before proving she's unworthy of it. (Unlike Blackstar who gets rewarded for his racism and violence by being made leader afterwards) and the fact she has to interact with her victims on a daily basis after what she did.

The writings attempts to redeem her are really lame and dismissive of the actually damage she did, but at the very least they TRIED to do something else with her. Personally, I would have loved to see her assassinated by Mistyfoot. Just like her mother Bluestar was almost killed all those moons ago by Tigerclaw... The parallels of violence for power and violence for peace. A victim repeating the actions of the very man who killed her brother to put an end to what he started in Riverclan.... A shadow in Riverclan, if you will. (<-Pretending erin hunter has hired me to rewrite their series)

Windclan: Tunneling as a concept and inviting outsiders into their clan so friendly and casual makes the clan seems so much more diverse than the others. It always stuck out to me!

Andddd there are my current warrior cat options as of 2023! If someone actually read this whole ramble ily<3

[fnafluffy]

I am. Going insane about the comic you just dropped. What happened to Ryu?? Why is he calling susato his sister? Did susato find him and keep him from kazuma?? Has Kazuma been going around like he's a grieving widow out or revenge??? How does this change the story??? Fascinating, very well done!

HAHA i guess i'll give some context after all! ok so first of all, the au has kazuma, susato, and ryunosuke all much closer than they are canonically and they've known each other for years. ryunosuke has always treated susato more as a little sister than kazuma does. basically ryunosuke "dies" from blunt force trauma to the head but didnt really die but they dont find that out until later. kazuma goes crazy from this and thinks susato did it. even though susato was proven innocent, he still clings onto that (from guilt and grief) and begins to obsess over it. They have to keep kazuma physically away from susato on the ship because he tried to kill her when she said she didnt do it. this resulted in sholmes jumping in to protect her by shooting and grazing kazumas head, making him lose sight in his left eye. susato takes on kazumas past ambitions of becoming a lawyer and sholmes houses susato once they get to britain. kazuma becomes an apprentice to zieks to be a prosecutor so that he can put susato away. susato has to cut her hair and dress like a british man for court. Once they find out about Ryu being alive, the 221b family houses him until he can make a full recovery. (he is VERY concussed--therefore cannot open his eyes rn) and thats where the comic picks up!! Ryu calling susato his little sister was added in as an extra punch to kazumas gut because after all their trauma due to kazuma being a freak, ryu starts actually calling susato his little sister and being an older brother to her that kazuma never got to be. hes basically disowned by her and replaced.

[enlighten3d]

guys im going so insane rn why are they letting me think abt both rau and poetry at once oh my gods

I NEED TO EXPLAIN RAU TO TUMBLR. PARROT KILLS WIFIES BY ACCIDENT BCS HE THOUGHT THAT HE WAS THE CLONE AND THEN THE CLONE (lastfies) REPLACES WIFIES AND PARROT DENIALS/GASLIGHTS HIMSELF INTO THINKING THAT WIFIES NEVER DIED AND THEN HE HAS TO UNLEARN THAT AND LASTFIES IS FUCKED UP AND KILLS PEOPLE INCLUDING KEN BCS KEN DOES NOT LIKE THE SITUATION AND PARROT BLAMES HIMSELF FOR EVERYTHING AND O H M Y G O D S

theres. so much symbolism and cool shit and aaaaaaaaaaaa i love this au deeply. im not normal abt it. i love lastfies. hes fucked up (bcs this is based off The Post and hes the last living clone). and theres the thing of it being a tradition to the clones to rip off the part of the headband that says that clones number when you kill them so when lastfies kills ken (bcs ken and parrot were arguing abt the whole wiifes is dead thing (ken didnt know), parrot was getitng upset and lastfies does anth for parrot bcs parrot saved him and he respects parrot (aka completely misunderstands his grief as approval), lastfies gives parrot kens earring. so. whats another guy dead. he doesnt know ken.

and parrot cant even look at the moon or the stars anymore bcs wifies liked the stars and lastfies doesnt. and when he finally makes a grave for wifies he talks to the stars and imagines him (and ken) as one of the stars looking down at him. and the graves are in the place where parrot buried wifies headband, and the place where he leaves flowers upon flowers, two yellow carnations (one for each of them), and endless apologies, and he gives ken the explanations that she never got but ken doesnt hear them because shes dead.

and wato saw wifies die, saw parrot leave with the wrong wifies, but maybe it was a dream, maybe it was their memory being fucked up after the mask. they stop putting in the personal touches in the escape room, make them a bit easier. the new wifies never was as good at escape rooms. the point isnt to trap lastfies and parrot in them forever. and he cant even grieve because hes not going to fucking talk to parrot, and kens still stuck in proton (HES DEAD KEN IS DEAD HE DIED AT THE END OF PROTON BUT PARROT TELLS NO ONE AND EVERYONE THINKS THST HES ALIVE, JUST TRAPPED IN PROTON FOREVER), so she waits for ken yo show back up so they can figure it out, but ken never shows up.

and the memory of who wifies is is as fucked up as ever. evilfies was wifies, clonefies was wifies, and now its lastfies. clonefies (our wifies) never got an identity of his own, he was always just wifies, no one ever knew that he was separate from Before Wifies (evilfies), and no one now knows that lastfies is a different wifies too. and parrot accidentally killed the memory of clonefies too, not just because he literally killed him but because he never talks about him.

and lastfies thinks that parrot is proud of him, that hes doing the right thing, bcs lastfies has never known anything other than violence and betrayal and tearing off a part of who ones victim was as a keepsake, as a tradition, as maybe a higher chance his number will get called. and parrot is strong in his eyes, parrot just killed yet another wifies, parrot is proud of him because he wears the victories (he keeps that bloodied spyglass on his belt and ties that earring onto a piece of string tucked amongst his feathers and he never lets them go) that lastfies gave him. all of lastfies victories (branzy, thing 1 and thing 2 (kier and dev) (yes those three are dead), and ken) are now parrots bcs hes given them all to parrot. parrot has everything of lastfies thst has ever mattered and lastfies doesnt mind because parrot is his everything and his only friend and ally and as things have always gone that means thet psrrot will kill him eventually and lastfies will accept that when the day comes because hes only ever known betrayal.

fuck im not okay this au is all that i have been thinking for the past three days. fuck. @milo-the-mage thank you for coming up with this idea but also fuck you /pos

gods. sorry this is so incoherent but PLEASEEEEE ASK QUESTIONS IF YOU HAVE THEM, THERES SOOO MUCH I COULD EXPLAINNNNNNN

fuck

[elisacaleisa]

People say I am a big brain. Idk about any of those things but to that I say: have one more again. This one is weaker but you get it, same thing as the ones before

Jax's Personality Swap AU (4)

Pipeline: Elliott > Morgan > Vega > Regulus > Caelum > Camelopardalis > Hush > Elliott

Elliott > Morgan

Hopeless Seer

- ok but childhood friend seer cooks

- Morgan is a deeply caring person

- Seer Obscura gets a nickname: Dreamer

- "dreamer... I've been calling you that for ten years. maybe more, heh."

- the softest boy ever, he is a walking teddy bear

- "I've realized... we will never reach the future, but we will always live in the present. it's the time, that changes. the time changes us"

- slow burn perhaps? But...

- "dreamer... i... I'm sorry, it's just... You're so warm and... i wish to hold you. please."

- he is alone in this world. it's just you, that keeps him alive. he doesn't have hope for this planet, but you are his world.

- he sleeps, eats, walks on the path, that was established for him since he was born. But you... You became his future...

- he craves you as a lover, but is afraid to lose you as a friend

----

Morgan > Vega

Melancholic Demon

- sigh trademark

- "... what do you want, warden? Cant you see im grieving for my pet?"

- you ask many questions, but barely get any answers around of him

- he only talks to you out of everyone

- "why? heh. Dumb question, warden."

- you still ask anyway. he laughs. full of pain

- "did you kill my pet, warden?"

- what? What is he talking about? And why would you do that...

- vega turns his back to you. Until you confess, he says

- he has been in here for a long time. maybe it was someone from the past and he can't live in the present.

- he wants his pet back. he wants noone else but them. but you dont know who that was...

----

Vega > Regulus

Raging Fallen Daemon

- he is pretty pissed i imagine

- "if i can't have you, no-one can."

- OH HE KIDNAPS YOU

- he is angry, upset, but never alone. Now that he found you.

- everyone is looking for you two

- "precious, don't leave"

- you try to resist, but he is in your head now

- and you dont. You listen. You are now his company. He never stops holding your hand.

(jax note: this specific swap might be edited or completely reworked later)

----

Regulus > Caelum

Self-claimed Prince Daemon

- Was Polaris' greatest student, perhaps that got into his brain a bit,,

- this is a headcanon fun bit of what if Regulus wasnt fallen and was Leo constellation, so enjoy!

- he is all huffy and puffy at first

- "hey! Wake up! You do not sleep on Caelum like that!" owie! Did he just hit you by a pillow??

- "you are awake. Good. Now up! We have so much to do!" god what is this flying pipsqueak?

- "pipsqueak?! I beg your pardon?? I am Caelum, an empathy daemon and now, you are my charge! Simple to understand, now chop chop! Clean your face and ugh... Please, wear some clean clothes, looks like you didnt change for three days. We have to fix that! Coooomeeeee ooooonnnnn!!" okay he is pulling you from the bed. You cant win here freelancer

- he sounds like a spoiled brat and he maybe is, but slowly by time, you get to know him more and see that he is just a little guy with a job and heart on the right place. His methods can be dramatic, but he means well

- he says that you are ready for D.A.M.N., that the hidden talent in you is more than just your powers.

- "i think Gavin will help us here. He is a bit stupid, but he always gives me cookies!" blunt much, Caelum?

----

Caelum > Cam

Bubbly Serenity Daemon

- always so curious about human culture, both old and modern

- he especially likes bubbles

- "wow, how fascinating... this is truly wonderful!" he loves colors too

- "e-ehm, pardon my, uh... excitement. My name is C-Cam-Cam-Camelopardalis and i am your today's... wait, no, that doesn't make sense... does it?"

- he is a very polite, kind guy. he tries to always help, he just had a problem put words to the correct order (me fr)

- he loves walking outside in the sun. He is like a cat - he likes sunbathing and is kinda afraid of water (hmmm)

- he is a very tall guy, always hits himself in the head, god bless,,,

- he just stands out by how pretty and tall he is

- he writes little notes about his clients, mostly positive ones with stars and hearts! Perhaps mostly about you

- the walls of his office are full of fun stuff, like globe, astrology maps of constellations, dreamcatchers, oil paintings, etc.

- "i... i cant believe i found a friend between humans... thank you."

----

Cam > Hush

Soothing Entity

- you dont know who he is, what he is, but he is following you for days like a lost cat. Something about you is... attracting him. He wants to be near you.

- he is always sitting in your window, watching, but never daring to take a step inside

- "what are you doing?" he finally asks, after days of just watching you.

- "you're always here. And im always waiting" but for what? You ask

- "i dont know, doctor." and he goes to rest.

- you believe thats not true and you might be right. He seems to be hiding.

- there are demons around your place, around Dahlia. It drives you insane. You feel afraid. What are even those guys doing here? You did nothing wrong, right?

- and with hush, it got worse...

- "please, dont be afraid of me, doctor. I'm here for you. Please, doctor."

(jax note: this one might be changed too)

----

Hush > Elliott

Unknown Dreamwalker

- you didnt have to do any of this. You could've just leave him there, you could've had a normal life. Normal in rubbish and loneliness, but...

- just look at him. He is not normal. He is a fucking... superhero?? Supervillain??

- "sunshine..." oh yeah and that dumb nickname. Better than a nightmare, but... why does he looks at you that way??

- "I'm grateful." yeah yeah

- apparently, those guys are from some department he escaped. He was always an orphan, somehow sneaked into a normal orphanage and got adopted, but a mess happened and now... You dont understand any of it

(jax note: i just didnt have more ideas but take it as Elliott being mysterious /j)

[pumpkinsy0]

Can we get more hc's of curly helping pony with his seasonal depression? I love these two so much and your headcanons give me LIFE

WOOOOO HURT/COMFORT YEAAAAA RAHHHHHH

•ponys seasonal depression is like, whatever time was where his parents died, and i say that time and not where johnny and dally died bc generally speaking, ponys healing from their deaths, however id say when it comes to his parents deaths, he never rlly talks about it that much and kinda sweeps it under these other things???idk how to explain it

•BUT id say that pony never actually took the time to heal from his parents dying bc sm happened and at some point it kinda just hit him hard

NOW ONTO CURLY HELPING WOOO

•he did notice some differences in pony around the time but he thought that it would pass, and it did, but it always came back, he noticed that pattern

•as much as curly would love to go outside and fuck around to make pony happy, idk i think he’d respect that he just doesnt wanna go outside constantly, sometimes pony just wants to lay down and who is he to hate on that

•even when they go outside its nothing too crazy, its to just take a walk or sit in the porch or somethin, gotta get pony some air, cant stay in that stuffy room forever

•curly WILL be taking pony to visit his parents grave, its the least he can do for the grieving guy

•took pony to get some flowers and whatever else he wanted to get to decorate their grave, no jokes or nothin, he really didnt even know what to say to pony to cheer him up

•curly didnt go to the curtis parents’ funeral and therefore didnt rlly get to say his final words to em, so to like to imagine that to help pony in whatever way it does that he talks to em and get what he has to say out, maybe it was to encourage pony to do the same

•he brings pony lil gifts like a cool postcard he stole or a lil trinket

•he lets pony talk about the small things his parents used to do w him, he wasnt that close to them like darry and soda was, but he did have his moments

•ponys mom had a recipe book on top of the cupboard and curly would try to make some of the foods, key word try, he somehow burnt em a lil but its the thought that counts

•pony would mention to curly how he was kind of starting to forget small things about his parents, like how they laughed, how they smelled, that sorta thing, and so curly would VENTURE out to find small things that could remind pony about his parents

•he also got pony to draw his parents for the first time in a while, so he wouldnt forget more what they looked like and he can look back on it

•ALSO YES, he is making sure pony eats something, but its not rlly like a full dinner, maybe something like mac and cheese, something small and simple

UNRELATED, but hc that darrys room is actually just his parents room, darrys barely redecorated it himself bc hes actually so distraught over them still and that room is like a time capsule, thats kinda why nobody ever rlly goes into darrys room, especially pony, they dont wanna be reminded of who used to be there