#but on the other you don't get to hear old beloved songs as much live

[burningcomputerpersona]

My mind wanders as I settle in Neck deep in calculated time wasted And time well spent I fight for hours to conjure these constructs to be misled But it's just another day It's getting hard to rationalize The pursuit of prestige on these 10-hour drives So will you still salute me as this ship starts sinking Cause these sails are made from wishful thinking The curtain's been pulled So string me up from your rope string lights As they burn blue and bright We felt like kings as we walked through the alley that night So call me a cynic As I pray on the optimist You're all just martyrs Looking for a sword to fall on So sharpen your blades as you sharpen your tongues It's getting hard to rationalize The pursuit of prestige on these 10-hour drives So will you still salute me as this ship starts sinking Cause these sails are made from wishful thinking So much to lose and less to gain I'm a shovel against an avalanche I only have myself to blame But I'm doing okay (I gathered all my things and fled the scene) (I traded parties for wandering aimlessly) (Around the streets outside Columbus) (But I'm doing okay) It's getting hard to rationalize The pursuit of prestige on these 10-hour drives So will you still salute me as this ship starts sinking Cause these sails are made from wishful thinking It's getting hard to rationalize Leaving loved ones behind with those tears in their eyes So will you still salute me as this ship starts sinking Cause these sails are made from wishful thinking

Rationalize by Action/Adventure

[formosusiniquis]

This one goes out to that old guy I saw at walmart yesterday loading up his pioneer woman cookware onto his motorcycle while enter sandman played

steddie | G | WC: 1154

---

“Hey baby, can you?”

“No.”

Steve's sweet tone sours immediately returning to the much more familiar gently bitchy tone Eddie knows and loves. “You don't even know what I was gonna ask.”

“Twenty-five years of marriage, lawful and not, Sunshine. I know when you're about to ask me for some shit we don't need.”

“Why would I be calling you if we didn't need it?”

“Because if you needed it you would have told me about it when I said, ‘Stevie, sweetie, light of my life, sun to my dawn,’” he looks around trying to figure out where the hell they moved the oranges and why the produce section is never in the same configuration anytime he comes here. He makes eye contact with a kid wearing an artificially faded printing of his own tour merch looking at him with a starry eyed look of recognition not of the celebrity but of family.

“Did you forget where you were going with that old man?”

He decides he might as well put on a show, both halves of this conversation already know he's going to do what he's told. “‘Stevie, my one truth north, my muse, my reason to continue living, my dearest husband, I'm going to Walmart,’ I told you not but thirty minutes ago and asked if you needed me to get you anything and you said no.”

“Oh, you aren't going to monologue for your adoring public all the sweet names I called you?” Steve is amused, he can tell, he's always been able to tell. He's accepting this as his penance for not giving Eddie an actual grocery list when he left.

“Well dear heart I am in public, but if you think we can find another grocery store to go to after getting banned from this one. I guess there is the Kroger on the other side of town.” The kid laughs, tries to hide it behind their hand, but if Eddie has had anything in this life it's experience with teens eavesdropping on conversations they shouldn't be.

“Oh you're really hamming it up, huh, Teddy. Can I tell you what you're getting me yet or do you still have a couple minutes in your set?”

He's given up on oranges, moves on to the onion he actually came here for, the lone ingredient for dinner that he'd forgotten from his clicklist. If they want to actually have the roast tonight it needs to start soon. “What is it that you remembered we needed, oh song of my heart.”

“I already sent you the link so you get exactly what I want.”

It's just ominous enough of a non-answer that he pulls his phone out of his pocket, juggling it and the five things he'd already grabbed that weren't on his one item list. He doesn't have the time to regret not grabbing the cart he was sure he hadn't needed when he sees what he's been sent.

“I'm on my bike! Where am I going to put that?”

“I'm sorry, am I hearing you correctly? Was I right when I said, ‘Teddy bear, my stars, my bard-’”

“You aren't on speaker.”

“My beloved damsel in distress, maybe the motorcycle isn't the most efficient of midlife crisis vehicles. Aren't you going to want something with more trunk space, why don't you get a Caddy or a Bimmer for old times sake. And what did you say?”

“I don't recall.”

“Probably for the best wouldn't want you banned from Walmart, what would the tabloids say?”

“Nothing that would match your wit, Sweetheart. Does it have to be this one?”

“Yes, the plaid matches the kitchen remodel, so be a good boy and strap it to your bike. And remember we've still got one kid to put through school if she decides to go, don't bring home any strays with you. Do you need to do your encore now, baby?”

“I accept your quest, my dashing prince. I shall return home with my bounty posthaste.” Encore complete, audience still enraptured, Eddie dips into the sincere. It's been nearly thirty years together and he's not once ended a call without saying, “I love you.”

“Love you too, my knight in denim battle vest. I'll see you when you get home.”

The call ends with the usual dull toned beep beep, the playlist the call interrupted starts to filter back into his earbud. He realizes he's going to have to walk right past the kid to get to the side of the store with Steve's Instant Pot.

“Hear they're about to have a reunion tour,” he says gesturing down at the reprint of their Came Back Wrong Tour shirt. The faux-fading has left a crack through his own face at the bottom making him unrecognizable, not that he looks the same now as he did at 25. “Those old bands just don't know how to retire.”

“I think it's smart that they're playing up the recent tik tok fame.” The kid says, “No one's even seen their lead singer since the 90s and after their first national tour he'd started wearing that mask.”

It hurts a little bit the way the kid says 90s like it's some bygone era lost to time. Tries to appreciate instead how good the mask idea had been, he'd really been an innovator. “That was a pretty sweet gimmick, you think he'll bring it back? It's kind of Orville Peck's thing now isn't it.”

The kid slumps, managing the impressive feat of looking desolate while standing over the tomatoes. “Probably, not that I'll see it. I couldn't manage to get a ticket.”

That is something he can fix, “Here,” he manages to grab ahold of his wallet, “as luck would have it, I've got a couple spares.”

The kid looks torn between fear and elation, it's likely at least the second strangest thing to ever happen to them in a Walmart. “Oh I can't-”

“No strings, I got it through work for my sister-in-law to go with my husband. She asked why none of the good bands ever have reunion tours so… not going obviously. And my husband insists he's too old to be that close to the stage. You'd be doing me a favor really.”

“If you're sure,” they say, the hesitance more a mannered necessity than real.

“Sure as shooting. Seriously, here give me your name so my husband knows who to make the thank you note out to.”

“Aspen, thank you really!”

Twenty minutes later when he’s got a kitchen appliance bungied to the back of his bike he’ll appreciate that something good came out of this. Three weeks later when he’s standing at the front of a sold out arena he’ll mostly appreciate another chance to be dramatic, “This next one is for Aspen who didn’t laugh when an old man tried to flirt with his husband in the produce aisle. Gareth, count me in.”

[multific]

A Thousand Years

Astarion x Reader

Summary: Astarion tells a story of love.

"Tell me about your wife." said the man sitting in front of Astarion, the room was quiet around them, only the crackling of the fire could be heard.

Upon hearing the word, wife, Astarion's features softened. 

"It might be a long one."

"I want to hear it." insisted the man as he leaned back in his chair, waiting for Astarion to start.

Astarion smiled, his eyes filled with love as he began.

"My wife... My beloved Y/N. She saved me you know, in more ways than one. She not only helped me kill the man who caused me so much pain and suffering, but she saved me from myself.

My beloved was a strong woman, brave and incredibly beautiful. She was a kind soul and yet, she could kill a thousand men without taking a break.

She loved songs and loved to dance. Although that might be because I was the one dancing with her. She often said she didn't wish to dance with anyone else but me.

She enjoyed sweets. But only the ones I have given her.

And even if I told her not, she kept on eating them.

It has been so long yet, I will never forget her laugh. She became my world. You know, it wasn't even intentional, I fell in love by accident. I was only meant to seduce her so she would help me kill Cazador. And yet I found myself in love.

But make no mistake, I never regretted the feelings I have. Not once. Falling in love with her was so easy.

I am quite privileged to be able to tell that she was my wife.

My... scars on my back, she cried when she first saw them. She hugged me and told me how sorry she was for I had to endure such pain. She kissed me and cried at the same time. I was so confused by it, I didn't know what to do.

But then, not long after, I asked her to marry me." Astarion looked at the gold band on his finger.

"I never believed in marriage, I thought it was silly for people to bind themselves to one another, and the symbol of it all... a simple ring. I laughed at the idea until I met the person I never wanted to let go of again. Suddenly I wanted nothing more but to have her bonded to me and for me to be bonded to her. I looked and searched for the perfect rings. Matching ones, but hers had a simple stone in the middle. A stone which was made of our blood. The perfect diamond, mixed with my and her blood. And then, we were married. Not like the words of others mattered to me, I would have been happy just to have her in my life, but to have her as my wife... it meant everything. 

I will not bore you of the events directly after the wedding, leave it up for your imagination I suppose, but I can assure you, she was the first woman who could have me at her feet with a simple look.

And she always looked at me with so much love and care. She was always so gentle and lovely.

When people say love burns like fire, they lie, my love for her burns like lava, much like the core of the Earth. I was ready to destroy everything and everyone who would dare get between us. If I had to, I would have burnt down villages for her, for she was mine.

And not long after, she gave me the greatest gift. 

A gift so precious.

I will never forget the look on her face when she told me, pure happiness.

She was with child.

Something I never even thought would be possible for me and yet there she was, getting more and more round with my child, with my son. Our son.

She was the sun for me. I have lived a long life in darkness and pain, and she made it all go away with a simple simple. I had a life of happiness thanks to her." Astarion leaned back in his chair once more when the noises from the kitchen stopped.

"STOP TELLING PEOPLE I'M DEAD!"

"I have never used the word 'dead', My Love." Astarion turned to look at you as you exited the kitchen.

"But you made it sound like I am." you pouted as Astarion looked at the ring on your finger, he smiled as you placed the food on the table. "Don't listen to him, Love, he is but an old romantic." you said as you sat down.

"I am very much aware, Mother. I just like to listen to him talk about you." admitted your son as he smiled at the two of you. Now a grown man, yet all you could see was him as a little boy running around the house, hair silver like his father's but eyes the same as yours.

"That's because I love your mother very much."

"I love you too." you replied as you all finally began to eat.

You two loved each other for a thousand years, and you will continue to love for another thousand to come.

Your son could only hope to find such love.

Taglist: @fleursirvart@greenarrowhead @thisismysecrethappyplace@sincerelyfan@theoneanna@aestheticsandmarvel@rororo06@castellandiangelo@destynelseclipsa@spilledinkindumpster@capsiclesdoll@puknow@alwayshave-faith@alex12948@lxdyred@imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl@anonymoussherlockandmarvelgeek@praline357 @trshngyn@avengers-r-us @violet-19999 @top1bbgloak @manduse@jacalineiscomingforyou @mandoloriancookie@noname2246

In case you want to help out a dreamer: patreon.com/multific  

~Masterlist~

ˇAO3ˇ

DO NOT STEAL, REPOST OR TRANSLATE ANY OF MY WORKS  

[neoyi]

Just came from theaters. Thoughts (spoiler heavy) under the "Keep Reading."

I pretty much expected the narrative to be the safest, straightest Point A-to-Point B plot. Being a ninety minute film (which my bladder thanks, because I can't watch movies past the two hour mark in theaters without rushing to the restroom nowadays), it never stays in one place or dilemma for long; this film is snappy. Everybody takes things at face value amazingly quick and advance the plot with little struggle. It's kind of odd, because normally this would bother me WAY more since the emotional impact of the protagonist's personal arc should have that gravitate (this film needed maybe like, an extra ten minutes), but I think having a paper thin plot that runs entirely in speedrun mode probably saved it more than killed. It is right to the point, says what it needs to, establishes and answers, and then moves on. I think having a laser focus goal (Mario and Luigi ends up in the Mushroom Kingdom, Peach needs to save it from Bowser, they go kick his ass) means all the little scenes that we do are crucial to the overall movie instead of pointless meandering. The action-y part of the film get to linger the most, which are spectacular to see, though I would have sacrificed a few minutes of it for some introspection. I guess I shouldn't have expected much from an Illumination film, let alone Nintendo's default flagship. When you have a brand as big as Mario (he's pretty much gaming's Mickey Mouse, after all), it makes sense this movie is just... the most Okay Thing Ever. At the very least, it does mean the movie didn't get gross out humors or Mario spouting dated catchphrases, though the pop songs playing in the background DO stick out by contrast, even if it's another thing I'd expect from a mainstream western animated movie.

Probably the biggest jaw drop is not the isekai route (I'm 36, I grew up with American Nintendo lore where Mario and Luigi were originally from Brooklyn and I'm still grateful the movie paid tribute to it because damn it, I find that aspect of Mario Lore interesting, non-canonical my ass!) , but that they have... parents. Nay, a FAMILY. Mario and Luigi have always BEEN Mario and Luigi. We see their parents from the knee down and cloaked in shadows in Yoshi's Island, but that was literally a couple of screens post-credit; we never see their faces or catch their names or anything. Even the 1993 Mario movie only had Mario and Luigi - their parents were non-essentials. Imagine my shock to see they have A Mom and Dad. What the fuck? And not just parents, they have a whole extended family living under one roof (like any true Italians, of course.) I wanna know who these other folks are. Uncles? Cousins? There's a baby there. Mario and Luigi's cousin? Is the old guy their grandpa??? Help, I don't know what to do with this information. How do I take in Mario and Luigi having an actual family?

Pauline has a brief speaking role and it looks like she's in an important position. I'm guessing she's NYC's mayor. Does she know Mario in this continuity?

I see you there, Charles Martinet, voicing a character who looks like Mario, but it isn't Mario. ;D

Speaking of family, holy SHIT, this movie also clarified whether Donkey Kong was Cranky's son or grandson. It's the first! Granted, this might be true for THIS film only, but it's nice to hear someone lay out their relationship out loud!

It is absolutely to no one's surprise that the stand-out role is Jack Black's Bowser. Every scene he's in, he nails. He delivers with so much gusto and enthusiasm - this man clearly loved playing this guy. Dude gets a piano solo in the middle of the film (a love song to his beloved Peach, of course) because Christ, man, if you're gonna use Jack Black, then you gotta use every part of that buffalo!

I've already accepted that Peach is just the oddball humanoid out in the Marioverse long before canon established Mario and Luigi as Mushroom Kingdom originators, too. But the movie does something interesting and goes out of their way to explain why she's the only human in a sea of Toads. I imagine this could be potential material for the sequel. Like Mario, it's also hinted she, too is from Earth, before accidentally wandering into the Mushroom Kingdom as a baby. I have so many questions how this kid walked into a pipe located in a very obscure part of the NYC sewers (maybe her parents were very neglectful plumbers) and even more questions on her upbringing So, the Toads decided to just one take her in, raise her, train her, and then... crown her as their princess? This brings up the question on whether the Mushroom Kingdom started as a monarchy because of her or if they were filling in a vacant seat that they felt only she was worthy. It's such a weird, eccentric thing for the Toads to just DO, especially without a feasible explanation, but also, I feel like this is something these mushroom idiots would kind of do. I mean, have you seen them? They're hopeless.

I would have been fine if Mario learned all his acrobatic parkour skills in the training montage alone, but I actually love that he's always been acrobatic just from dodging Brooklyn's many, many, maaaaany obstacles. Is it silly? Yeah, it is, but ya know what, people do parkour in real life every day, so why not?

Mario and Luigi taking off their gloves to reveal their... hands, is weirdly off-putting to me. Like these are just CGi cartoon hands, but they have like nails and creases and stuff. And it sticks out so badly that all I wanted was for them to put the gloves back ON. Which is funny to me because official Mario renders do this all the time. Like look at a recent 3D model of Mario and see the visible strewn of hairs sticking out from his hat. I don't know why the hands don't work for me. Maybe I'm just so used to them wearing gloves 24/7. Kind of like Mario's nipples.

I suspected Luigi wasn't going to do much from the trailers I've seen, and that proved correct in the final film. He does get to use the super star with Mario to beat Bowser, but I feel it went a bit unearned. Look, if there's a choice between Peach getting kidnapped or Luigi, than I'd rather it be the latter. Peach here is leagues better than what she's originally stuck with, and it really was for the better. I just kind of wished Luigi had maybe a moment prior to the final fight where he, I don't know, gain some courage, and try to free himself and all the other prisoners. I mean, the film already squeezed in Donkey Kong's daddy issues for all the five minutes it had, I don't see why they couldn't do the same for Luigi. I feel then his team-up with Mario (which isn't thoroughly unjustified - they are the Mario Bros) would have felt like a gradual step forward with his character. Ahh well, maybe in the sequel. Which probably will happen. It'll be good news for Yoshi fans if it does, if the post-credit tease is anything to go by.

tl;dr: This is a very safe movie, though I expected it as much. It's like, there are all-age films designed for their target audience, but thoroughly enjoyable for older folks, too. And then there are kid's movie which are... just for kids. This movie is the latter. It's either that or designed for longtime/dedicated Mario fans, which I am also the latter.

I'm not entirely sure if I would consider it a fun movie, but it's not bad. Shallow, but not bad. I have no genuine grievance or high praises for it. But I enjoyed my time regardless and didn't feel like it was a waste. And hey, that's fine with me.

I will absolutely be getting this on bluray, are you kidding me? (Funny little ancedote: A kid sitting next to me in theaters was thoroughly disappointed with the movie. Like straight up groaning, because Bowser did not win. It put a smile on my face. You're gonna conquer the world, kid!)

[lil-melody-moon]

Hello Mel! I hope you’re doing well 🥰 I’ve seen that you reblogged the album ask thingy. I’m not sure if I have to give you the name of the album and a number or just the album and you answer all of the questions. So, If it’s not too much to ask, can you answer all of the 10 questions about Quadrophenia? I know how much you love that album and I’d like to know your thoughts on that one❤️ Also, you know how much I love to see your posts talking about the music you love hehe. Love ya <3

Hello, I've been doing so so but thank you for asking <3

The thing for it is to give a name for the album and some numbers, but what you ask for is perfect! I was hoping for someone to asking about "Quadrophenia", thank you that it was you! So without further ado.

1. Favourite and least favourite track?

Oh Gosh this will be difficult.

"5:15" is my favorite track of the whole album because of a few things. First being the fact that this was the first song I heard from this album. Funny story, mom wrote down a Depeche Mode song called "Little 15" and she wrote that it is a The Who song so I typed it in and "5:15" came up so we've listened. Mom didn't like it very much, but I fucking vibed - you can imagine my sheer surprise when I've found the album where this song was. Also, The Who's compilation CD I have has three tracks from "Quadrophenia" and "5:15" is one of them. Those three are never played quietly on dad's stereo system, never.

Now to the least favorite I actually don't know if I have one like that. I literally love every track on this album, but maybe I'll go with "I Am The Sea" because it's only an ambient of waves - which is very nice as an opening, considering how the story on album opens with "The Real Me", but ya know. Almost no music.

2. Side A or B? (for later releases: first half or second half; for doubles: A, B, C or D?)

This is a double so I have to choose between C and D - A and B are good too, but the rest of the tracks after "5:15" my beloved <3

And I think I'll go with C so that would include: "5:15", "Sea and Sand", "Drowned" and "Bell Boy". There's just something in those tracks that makes me get lost in music each time I hear them. I'm always missing the point where "Sea and Sand" ends and "Drowned" starts. Either it's so smoothly going from one to the other or I'm just so lost between notes. Plus there's "Bell Boy" come on, how could I not pick this side? XD

3. Thoughts on the cover art/packaging?

Just look at this beauty! Washed from colors, depressing with only Jimmy on the cover while the rest of the band is seen in the side mirrors. The cover speaks for itself. The first time I saw it I just felt I was up to listen to something good and damn, I wasn't wrong. I love the cover so much that I would be glad to have it as a poster in my room. I'm not joking, I even saw a similar big flag to buy and if I had money and space in my room for it, I would buy it - this album is my religion <3

4. Are any of the tracks important/meaningful to you? Why?

Oh God, the whole album is important, but if I have to narrow it to a few songs... I will talk about very personal stuff here.

"Cut My Hair" Now this is like an opening track to the beginning of the story, to see how Jimmy feels emotionally, but the tone and the entire setting of how his life looked, now that is what brought my attention right from the beginning. The guy just doesn't fit in, feels like an outcast and this verse right there:

Why do I have to be different to them? Just to earn the respect of a dance hall friend Have the same old row again and again Why do I have to move with a crowd Of kids that hardly notice I'm around? I work myself to death just to fit in

It reminds me of my days when i tried to fit in the society I live in. Now, I literally don't care how other see me, but I can see that with my clothing, interests, way of thinking I just don't fit in and I probably never will. But I gave up on "moving with a crowd" long time ago. And from here, my dear friend, things started rolling.

"I'm One"

This one is a simple matter, first verse bringing this in:

Every year is the same And I feel it again I'm a loser - no chance to win Leaves start falling Come down is calling Loneliness starts sinking in

Describing the loneliness Jimmy feels is very personal. I might not show it, but I'm a really lonely person, not being able to find the second half, searching for some understanding on that matter. I have the luck to have my mom who understands me because she was going through the same, but ya know. It ain't the same as having a boyfriend. Plus I just love how the last three lines of lyrics in this verse creates that autumn vibe <3

"Drowned"

Just because of the general tone and a call for freedom. The only ones truly free in this world are birds, we as humans are not. This chorus:

Let me flow into the ocean Let me get back to the sea Let me be stormy, let me be calm Let the tide in and set me free

Speaks exactly about it. Just to be free as the ocean's waves, it just sounds so nice <3

"Love Reign O'er Me"

I see this song as a call/prayer for love, for some understanding and affection. On top of that, it's also the emotional conclusion of the whole story, chaotic one, but so good to listen to every time. I think the most beautiful verse in this song is this one:

Only love can bring the rain That makes you yearn to the sky Only love can bring the rain That falls like tears from on high

I had the luck to discover this album and get first stage obsessed with it after watching a documentary talking about Keith Moon's death. I had the luck to fall in love with this song at that time and this verse which I quote here is exactly how I felt back then about it. Doesn't mean I feel differently about this song now, oh no, actually this song is the most meaningful to me from the few I've mentioned. I will sound insane now, but lonely heart searches for replacements and mine found such a one in this lunatic. Yep, I'm in love with Keith Moon. Can't help it, just like I can't help it but connect this song somehow to this weird situation.

5. When did you first hear the album?

UMN... September last year, I'm sure of it. Second The Who album I've listened to, wait a bit. ...23rd of September actually (month after Keith's birthday, can my discovering of The Who and him somehow become even more weird?). I had this album wrote down to listen to later after discovering "5:15" by accident as I've described above. I remember this day clearly.

I was fresh after lunch, excited actually just by seeing the cover. Listened to it once and then it went on repeat. I had to listen to it three times to have enough for one day. And it played for the entire week without breaks. This was just the beginning of my obsession with it tho XD

6. Have your thoughts on the album changed since you first heard it?

Yep they did. From first: "This is great" to the now "Favorite album of the 70s" I had like three stages with this one.

First stage obsession was the first week that it played each day.

Then came the second stage at the beginning of this year, just after I've watched the movie.

To then come to the third stage when I'm playing this album whenever I feel bad or songs from it are stuck in my head. A religion, you should understand XD

7. Are you a fan of other works by the artist/in the genre?

Of course! I will not rank The Who's albums here, but every single one of them has something good in it. Every single one is somehow different. I don't know how did they pull this off, but they did and OH am I so glad for that!

Also, I can kind of call myself a fan of Pete Townshend, especially if it comes to lyrics, I fucking adore how he writes and honestly I can't wait to have free time to get to his solo albums <3

8. A lyric you like from the album

I actually talked about this one in The Who ask, but here, a fragment from "Bell Boy":

Some nights I still sleep on the beach Remember when stars were in reach Then I wander in early to work Spend my day licking boots for my perks

Love Keith's soft voice in this one, I adore it. There are no words that could describe what I feel when I hear him there.

9. How did you discover the album?

Like I've said, through my mom's mistake, but it was a day after I've listened to "Who's Next" that I went to see other songs by The Who and "5:15" started playing randomly. I recognized it immediately and I wrote down the name of the album, just to give it a listen a few days later.

10. Do you own/would you like to own a physical copy of the album?

I don't own a physical copy of it, but I want it, I really want it at home. It's as important to me as getting "Help!" and "Abbey Road" by The Beatles and those two were a must at home. Same with "Waiting for the Sun" by The Doors. All three mentioned are at home already, "Quadrophenia" has to be here as well.

But I will say this. I will feel sorry for my neighbors once I get it. I can't play the three tracks quietly, let alone the entire album XD

[oklotea]

Hello EAH fandom, I present to you my newest crackship,

Daring Charming x Humphrey Dumpty.

After an entire lifetime of breaking his bones and multiple chronic illnesses, most people become completely unfazed of it. But he never does. He's sick and tired and sad. This is what started his disinterest and all around disdain towards most people who have it much much better than him. They don't care about him, they just know him as the tech kid who is always experiencing pain, so why should he care about them? He only tolerates a handful of people and, likes only 2 or 3. And he isn't that popular either. Who cares. He doesn't.

Daring Charming has everything. He's kind, handsome, chivalrous, VERY POPULAR, and rich. He knows exactly why he was born, he's a prince who helps and saves people, is beloved by everyone, and will end up marrying apple white. And he is very ok with that arrangement! He's very ok with most things! Because he's ok with most things, he doesn't really think further than that until it discomforts him. Besides people don't really look at him to have opinions or original ideas and thoughts, people don't think of him THAT deeply! And he's also cool with that. It's not what he's made for.

Humphrey keeps falling off of things and slipping and all around almost hurting himself horribly and Daring is always somehow there to save him. Always catching him and shit. It embarrasses Humphrey a lot but Daring is always cool about it, as he is with most things. This song and dance happens every so often and it always gets Humphrey feeling very very stupid about it. He isn't used to this.... What, commitment? From anyone? If he could say anything about Daring Charming is that he's VERY COMMITTED to keep up this ruse that he actually cares enough about Humphrey to always save him from feeling shittier than usual. At least that's what Humphrey tells himself every time Daring Charming makes his way into his mind. It's better to hold that strict belief, than believe... Anything else. He's too busy and tired for this shit. Besides, outside of that song and dance, and the stupid silly short conversations that surround them, they're at the end of the day not a part of each other's lives.

Until one day Humphrey had a great big fall and... For the first time in months he broke a bone, and now he feels a bit more sick and tired. Great. Daring for some reason wasn't there. It broke Humphrey for like, a minute over it, but then he just shoves those feelings away and decided that it doesn't matter. Daring never made ANY PROMISES he would always be there for Humphrey. And Humphrey is stupid. He's stupid.

Humphrey decides to do some work that he's been tasked to take care of for Blondie's mirror cast in bed, and everything is quiet. When suddenly he hears some very loud footsteps running up to his door, and someone barges in. And it's Daring Charming. Errrmmmmm what the fuck

Daring's jaw is agape, in disbelief... He quickly gets down on the floor next to Humphrey's bedside and expresses how sorry he is that he could even allow this to happen, almost sobbing as he explains. Humphrey is still processing him being here, completely baffled.

Humphrey sputters over his words and tells Daring that he shouldn't be sorry, it's not his responsibility any way. And then Daring cheerfully says that he had made it his responsibility for a while now. Wait. What.

Humphrey felt his face heat up, and once again he felt even more stupid. Just how easy is he to flatter?

Daring ends up telling Humphrey that he's going to make it up to Humphrey, by hanging out with him, and doing whatever Humphrey asks him too. He's going to be the most helpful friend Humphrey has ever had. For CHIVALRY!

Humphrey stares at him and says with a straightface, don't you have shit to do?

Daring smiles and answers, nope!

They do actually end up becoming real friends, and Humphrey pretends those old feelings aren't there anymore. Conversations with Daring are really really funny and intertaining, and this guy is actually like, really nice! And for once it was nice to have a friend you don't only interact with because of work or classroom projects. Like, if Humphrey could hang out with anyone... He would want to be with Daring. And that's weird. What the fuck.

Humphrey is always tired and pissed off about something, but the air seems to turn light and easy when Daring's around, and it's hard to not be effected by it.

It makes Humphrey very, very happy whenever Daring compliments and recognizes the hard work he puts into multiple school projects that have a technical division. And Humphrey found out that Daring is very good at giving compliments.

Errmmmmmmm nerd x popular guy moon x sunshine "I want to see more out of nowhere daring ships okay goodnight"

Omg why did I write so much this was supposed to be a dumb little post about this dumb little crackship but WHOOPS! hand slipped and this half baked mess is born. I honestly reallyyyyyyy like this dumb ship. I need more of these idiots. If anyone wants to feed into my delusions and see my vision feel free to add on. ALSO WE NEED A SHIP NAME.

[kookaburra1701]

WIP Wednesday - The Wives of Shor I: Moth to Flame

tagged by @dirty-bosmer tyty❤️ tagging @nientedenada and @tallmatcha

Fandom: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Rating: T (entire fic is E) Category: M/M Pairing: Kaidan/Lucien Flavius Genre(s): Romance (bodice-rippers my beloveds), bildungsroman Other main characters: Inigo the Brave, she/her Breton LDB

Summary: A scene from near the beginning of the fic, Kaidan and and Hadvar share a moment of soldier camaraderie the night before they delve into Bleak Falls Barrow. Lucien Flavius is by Joseph Russell, Kaidan is by Liv Templeton, and Inigo the Brave is by SmartBlueCat.

27 Last Seed, 4E 401 The cool night air was bracing; the usual sounds of daily life in Riverwood had given over to the quiet of the evening: the creaking of the water wheel, the rippling of water in the millrace, and a thousand crickets in the forest. High overhead the stars glimmered.

A creak of leather caught Kaidan's attention. Just at the edge of the lantern-light from the sconces at the door of the Sleeping Giant, Hadvar leaned against the roadside fence, looking up at the arches that carved out chunks of the night sky. He turned towards Kaidan as the inn's door clattered shut.

"Peaceful evening," Kaidan remarked, walking over to Hadvar.

"Aye," Hadvar replied, taking a sip from the tankard in his hand. "When I was a lad I thought it was too peaceful, and that living here I would never get my chance at glory and adventure." He laughed bitterly. "Now I'm going to choke on it. Did you want something from me?"

"You looked like you could use the company," said Kaidan, also leaning on the fence and looking up towards the barrow. "I also wanted to apologize." Hadvar looked up at him in surprise. "For not believing you about the attack on Helgen. About the-" even after hearing multiple eye-witness accounts the word felt strange and ridiculous on his lips "-dragon."

"Don't mention it." In the woods an elk's bugle echoed out of the trees. "If the tables were turned, I wouldn't have believed you, either. But you and Inigo helped me and for that you will always have my gratitude. Would have been a fine ending to my tale, perishing of thirst within sight of Whiterun's walls."

"That it would."

They fell into a companionable silence; the muffled sound of a Nord drinking song filtering through the sturdy timbers and into the night. Kaidan hoped it wasn't too bawdy a tune, but he also knew he'd been able to recite at least a dozen ribald limericks by the time he was Pascale's age and he had turned out fine. After a few more moments Kaidan spoke.

"I've been selling my sword long enough to know when a man is dreading the morning."

Hadvar sighed. "Is it that obvious?"

"Not too obvious. I, er, also overheard you talking to Lucien on the road," Kaidan admitted. "About the stories your gran told."

Hadvar groaned. "I've faced down bandits, rebels, anything else the Legion has pointed me at, and I haven't felt this nervous since the night before the first day of training." He suddenly turned to look at Kaidan. "If you're doubting my mettle, don't. My orders are to retrieve the Dragonstone, and get everyone back out safely. No matter how much some old ghost stories have me spooked I've never refused a mission and I don't intend to start now."

"Never doubted you for a second. I can tell you're a man who does what he intends to do." Kaidan turned to look back at the Sleeping Giant, its horn-pane windows glowing golden in the evening gloom. "I'm not too pleased about having tramp through a dusty old cave myself. Those places are always crawling with frostbite spiders."

Hadvar pulled a face. "And you just know that the mages will be wanting to stop to harvest venom and silk every time we kill one. Are you sure we can't leave them here?"

"I tried leaving them in Whiterun, you saw how well that worked!" Kaidan said, while Hadvar chuckled at his indignation. "Digging around in dangerous places is the entire reason Lucien came here, and trying to leave Pascale anywhere out of trouble...you might as well tell a cat to stay put." Hadvar laughed harder.

"I meant to ask you, how did you find yourself with such...an array of traveling companions?" asked Hadvar. "Not to put too fine a point on it, but you strike me as someone who is used to working alone. And...that girl does not look like your kin."

Kaidan could tell Hadvar was looking at him sideways, judging his reaction, and suppressed the annoyance at the question. It was only natural - Brynjar probably fielded it countless times as he dragged Kaidan around from one end of Tamriel to the other.

"She's not kin. She's from High Rock." Kaidan met Hadvar's veiled reproach without apology. "And if you must know, she saved my life."

Hadvar choked on the swig of ale he'd been taking from his tankard.

"Laugh all you want, it's true," Kaidan smiled himself now.

"And you had difficulty believing in a dragon."

[yridenergyridenergy]

Sukekiyo live report [2023/02/16]

Five years to the day since I last saw sukekiyo! 20+ hours on planes and back to Canada tomorrow, just to attend this special show; I just had to!

It is extremely difficult for me to remember what moment goes with what song. Had I attended more sukekiyo concerts more regularly, there might be more stuff that would have stuck out as being associated to a song, but it's only sparse details. All I remember in general is Kyo dancing in so many various ways, caressing his face, messing up his hair, etc.

Overall, it was literally a blast pop party, exactly like I wanted it! Epic from beginning to… almost the end, as the official setlist closed with 'aftermath', which I find boring to begin with but it really dampened the mood. The only thing I can say about 'aftermath' is propos to Kyo for the high chorus, but it also looks weird when you don't sing like the studio version and that the screen displays your younger self in the PV mouthing stuff differently.

Anyway! 'aftermath' aside, holy hell! For five years I have been simply blasting sukekiyo's songs in my car every other weekend, the hype building for each song as I sang along with them. So hearing those beloved melodies pouring from the stage was epic! I was super into each beat from the start, while the crowd stayed immobile for the first half. But I had checked the website and no rules were listed other than concerning the virus.

Everybody walked on stage and the crowd was dead silent. What also made it really awkward was that there seemed to be quite a long delay between each song of the set, and that was done in complete silence, no clapping even.

I was on the right side so I couldn't tell you much about Mika or UtA, but Yuchi was wearing a pullover (orange?) and he had very dark and thick lipstick. Takumi's braids were light coloured, so all the stage colours were reflected on his head. As for Kyo, he wore a long black dress with puffy long sleeves. He had a black collar/choker on top of that, unless the separated line was connected to the dress in the back. He had no tights underneath, as we could notice when he crouched with a leg spread in front of him during one of the songs, lingering there for a few seconds. Otherwise, what kind of struck me was that he had a black lacey glove on his left hand, whereas he tends to wear a glove on his right one with Dir en grey, because that's always where he holds the mic. It was kind of odd in that context to see Kyo's tattoos on his right hand, especially as it somewhat contrasts with the feminine outfit. Always wondering to what extent that was intended. And Kyo's haircut was similar to the one he had in Liquefacio, which I loooved!

Before the concert started, the background music was actually audio excerpts from some Japanese drama shows. Not sure if anime or live. It seemed like they were old, from the previous century, so I don't think that many in sukekiyo's fanbase knew what it was. One of the female characters sounded super distressed at some point, like she was getting violently victimized. Not that later segment, but the overall idea of the drama shows featuring mainly female characters is important for something later in the show.

Onto the detailed stuff!

The show started with Scarlet, but actually there was an instrumental prelude to it with a similar melody, just no drums I think. Because as you know, studio Scarlet starts with a BANG. In fact, quite a few songs had preludes to them, and in some cases the sounds were different enough that I wasn't sure what song would be coming up, or if it was a "session" even. But all in all, those new extended intros were always sweet and appreciated! Maybe it made up for how there was no smooth transition from one song to the next.

Kyo sang Scarlet with such passion. I remember him sensually sliding a finger from top to bottom along the rose lights on his mic stand, around the beginning of the concert as well as in a second song.

Then it was En, which was of course epic! Kyo struggled with some of the choruses sang in high notes though, but that seemed to improve in the second half of the show.

I can't remember much from 'kisses' other than having the certainty that Kyo danced a lot, most likely one of the sensual times. Oh, actually, I had made a mental note that for a song called 'kisses', Kyo did some huge hip sway twice amd that was the focus instead.

Kisses ended and Kyo said: "Ai de gomen nasai", or at least it sounded like thar but the "gomen nasai" was kind of jumbled up into two syllables only, somehow. And then began Hakudaku. At this point in the show, people were still really immobile and quiet, so it was the whole band being passionate, especially Kyo, and me vigorously nodding my head to the beat.

Oh, and then my neck got no rest at all because beauty Mozaic Shoujo's notes began playing, but I think this was one of the songs where the introduction left you wondering if your favourite song (one of them anyway) was really going to be the one played next. The PV was projected in the background during it. During the chorus (Ano hito janakyaya, ato dore kurai), Kyo started vigorously pointing right, centre then left (from his perspective), bending his arm and extending it toward us with each word, not just to act the lyrics of "not the right person", but it seemed like a real wakeup call for the crowd. Like SLAP, Kyo wants you to gesture with him! Look alive! He was so into it.

After that, aoguroi hysteria came and for some reason, despite it not being a pop song, out of nowhere some fans raised their hand during the chorus. I can't remember them doing so in 2017 and 2018 when I last saw it performed.

Furesaseru, honestly I don't have any vivid memories from that song. The chorus is intense as it sounds, but other than the lyrics being projected, that's it. Maybe it was during this song that Kyo faked puffing a cigarette, gesturing and exhaling, while the screen showed slivers that could kind of be interpreted as smoke.

Oh but then, Aishita Shinzou! I think it was at the beginning of that song that Kyo was sighing sadly in the mic before the first notes were played. He (or the character he was acting) gave off this very "clingy" personality, due to the way he sang some of the lines. It sounded lyrical, romantically needy, and he went left and right on stage for both instances. To conclude the song, Kyo's last couple of syllables were uttered as a cry or a long, loud exasperation, bending backward as he did so. Then, it looked like he continued the motion of lowering his mic even though his body wouldn't bend any further backward, so from where I stood, it was like he shoved the mic in his mouth in disgust and finality. I wish I knew the lyrics, but they must have been relevant.

I don't recall for which songs specifically, but today's concert undid sukekiyo's reputation for impeccable music. I had known the band's musicians to sound just like the studio recording on stage, which made me really admire their professionalism and expertise. But tonight, it was definitely not just Kyo improvising, and sometimes that made the instrumentalization sound honestly off track.

Oooooh my beloved Valentina was next! I had never seen it live, even though it has existed for quite a while. Upon the first notes, those of us with the penlights pulled out our Valentina stick (although a couple fans took out the Candis one, which had been explicitly prohibited as they are different tints of pink too). I am so glad I bought them on the resale market, I would have felt so left out. It wasn't clear at first, as fans seemed shy and kept the pen light low until the chorus, but it seemed obvious after the first chorus that it could be left up the whole time! It's crazy how Kyo builds a connection with the crowd during this song. Is it just the pop-style gesture? He seemed to stare at us with wider eyes full of expectation, like he was concentrated only on this connection.

Dorothy was a cool pop song to prolong the mood. I was really into it, but I think most fans' arms were weak at this point. Was it in this song that Kyo was dancing left and right? There was also one song in which he did the Sustain the Untruth dance, but before he did that, he turned toward the left side of the stage and did kind of a Russian (?) dance, like crouching a bit and extending one leg, getting up and then alternating with the other leg? It looked a bit funny but Kyo was just doing whatever he wished.

Candis came, I think again with an extra intro, but we pulled out our Candis penlights (again, a couple of fans pulled out the wrong one, probably the same who had confused Valentina earlier). I guess there was a lot of dancing from Kyo, as the song demands!

Shiryou no ariana, I think there was a "session" at some point before, or after? In that improvisation, the band was playing music but Kyo faced the back of the stage and he said stuff as if he was answering someone on the phone. In my opinion, it sounded like the clingy girlfriend, as he was saying "hayakuuu" a few times near the end. I have a complete blank right now about the rest of the one-sided conversation, other than "Sou desu". Anyway, for Shiryou no ariana, the feed from the camera of the back platform was projected on the screen veil, but at first Kyo used his right-side mic so he was shown only on a third of the screen to people who were on the left. But he changed to the central one soon. It's always interesting to hear how Kyo screeches or sings the line that he then distorts and repeats for the rest of the song. From what the camera was showing, he was really focused.

Next was Sesshoku, and there were two special aspects about this song other than its traditional robot moves: Kyo sang the DOPE parts way not with a low pitch of voice, but mostly high-pitched at first, and I think he was shouting it in the second segment. And when Sesshoku ended, the projection displays rectangles like a piano's notes falling continuously while there were sounds like a horse's footsteps or something like that playing. And if I'm not confusing with a different song, it was then that Kyo pointed to lights in the projected video, which transformed into butterflies. And somehow, he knew when some butterflies would be animated to kind of break off or have a wing torn apart, as he seemed like he was pinching those rather than pointing. This went on for a while.

Honnou okotowari, it was less sensual than it had sounded to me, but judging by how I remember a lot of hands being up during this song, I guess it was then that Kyo started doing quite a lot of callouts for the remainder of the show. The traditional request to break our necks, the "Can you hear me?", etc. Oh, the calls for "Tobeee!" (jump) were very rocker. The "Cease to speak" and "shut down" were especially intense as well, with Yuchi's backup vocals. I have a vague recollection of Kyo pointing to us during those lines, maybe in reference to how we couldn't speak in the venue?

'Creeper' was full of fist pumping too! At this point, I'm not sure what song it was, but Sesshoku was over and yet Kyo danced into somewhat of a violinist position and he started swinging his left arm across his right to the notes of a certain string instrument, really mechanically and staring absent-mindedly somewhere in front of him on the ground.

Waizatsu then came on after a short break and by now, everybody knows how Kyo expects us to act during this song! It's been obvious since 2017 and at least the crowd responded accordingly. I don't know why, but the last Creepshow part was so intense. During the line about barfing, Kyo literally made a sound as though he expelled something from his mouth. He sang everything but the choruses way freeform, walking to each side of the stage with a crazy expression. It seemed so odd to see him super stoic behind the veil that showed the PV's shot of "Best of all time" or something similar with fireworks. Like dude, especially on your birthday, I want you to know that you deserve any award possible!

Next, Sharara! I think Kyo was more and more demanding by this point. It sounded like one of the high-pitched moments in the song was really a "sharara" rather than the increasing long note that it sounds like on the studio recording, just before the heavy part at the end. As far as I remember, Kyo was intensely headbanging around this song.

And then… Yeah, 'aftermath'. That whole atmosphere we had built, painstakingly in the case of Kyo re: fans not moving, came to a screeching halt real quick.

Kyo left while the song was not really finished, without saying his usual "Oyasumi", so we expected that it wasn't the real end. The other members finished 'aftermath', then Yuchi left and he was halfway out of the stage when finally we started clapping. On his way out, Takumi made exaggerated moves at the spot where Kyo stood, almost as if to mime that there was something/someone missing or that the spot was ready.

We clapped a lot, even though at first the announcer told us that it was over. But the guy with the big no-camera no-phone no-mic/recording sign wavef it in front of us again, so we kind of knew to stay, if there was still something not to record.

(I don't know when else to mention this, but I saw that UtA pointed at his part of the crowd a few times, as though to say that a person got it.)

Not too long after, the four musicians came back and we clapped even louder/more people joined in when Kyo walked back. He did a little MC at first, as though he wasn't sure what to do, but he thanked us, to which we responded by clapping even more vigorously. They played Kō mo Chigau Mono Nano ka, Yōsuru ni, and considering that I don't like the album remix, it honestly sounded more like the cleaner version of the demo? It was intense and everyone was into it, but as it finished, Kyo started saying something like something went wrong, that he hadn't done something, while passing a hand through his hair to mess it up more. So the band redid the last segment of the song, with Kyo screaming more intensely and moving more too. But once again the part ended and it was like he wasn't satisfied but played dumb wondering what was missing. Then the crowd actually broke the rule and people cheered, with one guy especially cheering on something Kyo said that made him reply teasingly (with fake offense/frown) that the guy was dumb, to which everyone laughed. And the last part of the song was played once more, Kyo being one notch more intense even, headbanging deeply. Before the last notes were played, he quickly turned, said "Bye bye" and dropped his mic on his way out of the stage unceremoniously. The other members finished with improvised rock to end the set with a bang. As Takumi later exited, he once again made wild movements at the spot where Kyo left his mic, as though offended for the poor little thing. All of them made gestures to their heart in appreciation for our energy tonight.

And with that, we were promptly kicked out of the venue by two staff members. That was truly it.

(And thank goodness there are larger parts at the tip of the penlights, because if I hadn't been gripping them hard, my intense swinging would have thrown them right at someone's head or even into the veil in front of the stage!)

[all-will-be--well]

The Maybe Man

ok no one asked, but here is my AJR album review, song by song:

🌀 Maybe Man: I love this. I have a special place in my heart for all their album openers, they always give me chills. I can't wait to see them open with this live, especially when it goes so hard at the end! I've danced to this a lot already. Also learning that each verse references one song on the album! like a table of contents! I love them so much.

💔  Touchy Feely Fool: Very cute, and fun to sing along with. Probably like a solid 7 or 8 out of 10. Great to listen to, and has grown on me after listening to that Zach Sang interview and learning a little backstory

👍  Yes I'm A Mess: One of my faves from the album. I feel like such a badass walking around listening to this. Wish I could whistle!! The only thing i can't stand is the very end. I don't mind the tempo change but I don't like the slo mo voices that sound like a toy running out of batteries

🤓 The Dumb Song: More mid-tier for me. Got a great swing to it, and the instrumental breaks are really fun to dance to like a total idiot. I like to try out the lamest dance moves and just really commit to it. Lyric-wise, it's cute but reminds me of male weaponized incompetence (I know this isn't the intention, just what i think about), so it makes me feel a little weird if I think about it too much. Can't wait to hear a whole crowd scream "You should nooooot have done that!"

▶️ Inertia: Currently, this is my FAVORITE song on the album. It's fun, it's meaningful, it's got a great beat, and there are sounds that bring me back to past albums so it feels almost nostalgic. They used the instrumentals a lot in their promos for this album, and I can see why. It's both angelic with the choir sounds, and dark with the reverb/bass sounds. So good.

🧍‍♂️ Turning Out Pt iii : Always appreciate the Turning Out songs. Personally, the original is still my favorite. But even that one took me listening to it a dozen times before it really HIT, and then i was crying in the car. So maybe the same will happen with this one someday! Also if i'm not mistaken it's Ryan on vocals? So that's fun to have a change (though honestly he and Jack sound so similar)

🧠  Hole in the Bottom of My Brain: Gosh, so fun! Has that kind of nursery rhyme theme where it builds on itself (swallowed the spider to catch the fly, etc). However, unlike a nursery rhyme, the lyrics are kinda complicated to it's hard to sing along to. I'm sure people will be singing along by the time they're performing it live, like everyone memorizing the rambling line from Karma.

💿 The DJ is Crying for Help: I want to like this one more than I do. Don't get me wrong, I do like it! I think I just find it a little auditorily overwhelming. Like the string arpeggios are awesome, but I can't listen to that and the back up vocals and other sound effects at the same time. idk. To quote my favorite movie, Amadeus: "There are simply too many notes"

🙅🏻‍♂️ I Won't: This one has been out for a while so I feel like I've listened to it a lot already. Definitely makes me swagger walking around my apartment like I'm a total badass. Doesn't get my blood rushing like some of the others, but again that might just be because I've heard it a lot already.

🎡Steve's Going to London: Took me a few play-throughs to actually realize it wasn't just a nothing song! I appreciate them kinda breaking the 4th wall in a very AJR way. This song has grown on me with each listen! Very fun to sing and dance to, and has a great beat. My prediction is that this song will have a lot of special effects when they perform it live. We'll see...

💜 God is Really Real: RIP Gary ❤️ I love that their dad became a beloved part of the fandom. Very touching that they released this song early when it became clear they didn't have much longer with their dad. Beautiful, meaningful addition to the album.

🍂 2085: Perfectly packages up the album! The lyrics say that the old-timey voice says "You are not alone, young child, young child" which is NOT what it sounds like?? So hopefully that gets cleared up. I've seen some claiming it's a Yanny/Laurel situation, and tbh i wouldn't put it past the boys to find a way to do that on purpose. (I hear "You are my heart grown, just know, just know" which i know doesn't really make sense, but it's sweet to me) But the lyrics at the end "You've gotta get better, you're all that I got" give me chills. And then switching to "I gotta get better, I'm all that I got" 😭 . Also loves that it connects so perfectly back to Maybe Man so I can just listen to the album on repeat without interruption

 THE END

[all-or-nothing-baby]

15 QUESTIONS, 15 (or whatever) TAGS

i was tagged by @ash-mcj—thanks dude! HERE is their's.

.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYBODY?

my middle name is the name of my mum's friend/dad's ex who died (my folks ended up getting together a year later).

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

about 10 minutes ago? to WELLY BOOTS which is an amazing devil song i've heard 10,000 times before. i honestly cry a gajillion times a day bc i don't just cry at sad stuff but also anything that moves me: from hearing a wonderful piece of music... to someone saying something kind to me or anybody else (real person or fictional character)... to being overwhelmed by the enormity of life and all its fucked-up and wonderful complexities... seriously, absolutely bloody everything makes me cry!

3. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

yes, two of 'em; a brilliant, beautiful, super-talented, immensely kind and outrageously hilarious 24 year old and a brilliant, beautiful, super-talented, immensely kind and outrageously hilarious 15 year old :) they're incredibly different individuals who bicker like siblings absolutely should and love each other a lot. i love them both so much it makes me cry when i think about it (surprise surprise).

4. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

oh, no, never. (probs too much at times—although i don't always understand when others are using it with me #neurodiversesquad).

5. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED?

used to do what the american folks call 'run track', back in the day before chronic illnesses became the villain in my story.

6. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT SOMEONE?

whether they, you know, get it (or not).

7. EYE COLOUR?

erm, a bit of an odd sort of dark grey/blue with lots of dark green swirls and splodges

8. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

oh definitely scary movies, horror my beloved <3 i think i'm finally (bc it's been on my list for so long omg) gonna get around to watching RELIC tonight! *scratching at the door noises*

9. ANY SPECIAL TALENTS?

forgetting absolutely fucking anything and everything all the fucking time. ALWAYS knowing the first letter of the word i can't think of. having a bit of a photographic memory. being able to play the william tell overture by flicking my fingernails against my front teeth. making really good pancakes. good at accents. pretty good at drawing faces. playing music by ear. great at making inconsequential lists lol

10. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

blackpool, a seaside town in the north-west of england, UK. imo it's a veritable shithole these days, only good for trashy arcades and getting stabbed... but i do miss the ocean now i don't live there.

11. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

making art, making words, making mixtapes, making trouble, making time for reading, making music, making a mess.

12. DO YOU HAVE PETS?

yes—i couldn't imagine not having critters in the house! i have 4 precious arseholes cats: little jimmy novak and moriarty, who are both house-loving cats—like, they do go out, but are indoors wanting cuddles more often than not. whereas the other two, grace jones ii and goku, are practically feral and only really come home for dinner and if it's raining hard (and the occasional i-will-allow-you-to-stroke-me-and-let-you-have-the-honour-of-me-sitting-on-your-knee-i-suppose).

13. HOW TALL ARE YOU?

5'2". short king.

14. FAVOURITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL?

loved art and english in high-school, and also enjoyed drama and history. i studied art at college and fashion at uni (which was a mistake, that world was very much not for me pfft).

15. DREAM JOB?

i honestly don't dream of jobs. but if i did? i suppose a portrait artist or published poet who was paid enough to actually live on, aha.

.

tagging, play or nay: @shealynn88 @sharkfish @novemberhush @greyhavenisback @poebin @jmeelee @raisesomehale @rajalagang @ohhalefire @halinski @kikiroo @lovebillyhargrove @harrgrove @slytherkins @witchsickness @ltleflrt @wellwaterhysteria @deklo @chasingcastiel @racheld93 @gabedemon absolutely anybody else who wants to do the thing!

[becauseplot]

staring at you with my big wet eyes. please ramble about poa I am so very intrigued and would love to hear more

okay, only because you ~insist~ <-explicitly asked for this and visibly vibrating with excitement

(i feel this should go without saying but spoilers ahead for this incomplete series!) (also im running on not enough hours of sleep so apologies if this is incoherent)

Philza of Azraelin is (supposed to be) a series following 26-year-old Philza Minecraft Watson who had a mental breakdown in his flat one night so he ran away to go get lost in the mysterious, monster-infested Azraelin Forest outside his hometown. You know, like you do. While out there, Phil unwittingly befriends the local flock of white-eyed crows, who turn out to be spirits that belong to a giant, ancient being trapped in a nearby mountain who goes by the mortal name "Kristin".

Phil carries on living in the woods, spending more time with Kristin, visiting her in the mountain, chatting and getting to know her better. She's good company. She's a good friend. Maybe he likes her more than a friend. Maybe he's just lonely. He isn't sure, but man, does he love to spend time with her.

He continues exploring the woods as well. As time goes on, he gets increasingly familiar with the abandoned little towns reclaimed by the forest. But he starts to wonder: no one really knows why the people of the Azraelin Forest disappeared. Most have assumed that the monster hordes drove them out. But as Phil becomes more and more acquainted with the forest, with the ruins, discovering ancient statues and structures, thinking about the few scattered stories of the Azraelin Forest that he knows...

There is an alarming amount of evidence pointing to some sort of catastrophe. And there are some things that Kristin doesn't like to talk about. And there are some things that Kristin tells him that don't add up. And Phil realizes that he doesn't know why Kristin is trapped in the mountain---chained up, alone, bound---in the first place.

...But he starts to think that Kristin might not be as trustworthy as she seems.

And that's the basic outline of what would be the first major arc! Some more little details:

This series is mostly just Phil flying solo in the woods. Like, the crows are there, but besides them and Kristin, it's pretty much just Phil for a majority of the story. (Other characters and settings would come into play much much later.)

The crows all have names and personalities! The third installment is supposed to be a retelling of the first installment from the crows’ perspective (with some extra Lore added in of course). Fun fact, the first crow that Phil encounters is named Bidmoss, and they’ve got a sailor’s mouth on ‘em!! >:)

I came up with this idea when I was brainrotting a FUCK load of old-immortal!philza fic ideas (like so many holy shit). But, I kind of started to miss philza aus where he was more susceptible to common threats like monsters and cold and hunger, where he didn’t know so much about the magic of the world around him, where he wasn’t so invincible, so I was like “hey what if I wrote a philza au where he’s literally Just Some Guy fucking around in the woods” and thus this was born. For the record, he is fully, completely human. Not an ounce of magic, divinity, or otherworldliness in him.

The spark for this au is this animatic! Idk it was just so silly and really played into the "he's Just Some Guy" idea that was rattling around in my head. poa!Phil and the crows would definitely do something goofy like this to cheer up Kristin when she's having a bad day. This animatic was also a source of inspiration!!

There are songs that go with this au, all from The Oh-Hellos: In The Blue Hours of Morning, Thus Always To Tyrants, Bitter Water, Exunt, This Will End (yes in this particular order; for the most part, the male voice is Phil and the female voice is Kristin, especially in Bitter Water; parents duo my beloved <3)

I affectionately refer to this au as AHH! au (ex: AHH!Phil) because it's the acronym of the first installment and because he does a lot of screaming in the second installment lol

Okay that's enough of that for now. Tbh there are probably details I'm forgetting because it's just been so long and I never write any of my shit down (wails), but the story doesn't end with what I've told you. I can talk more about plot, Phil's whole deal, the crows, Kristin, and the general setting, but I think this is enough word vomiting for this ask <3

Ty for letting me ramble, poa!philza my beloved <333

[here4theheartbreak]

Ohhhh, I'm so jealous you could go to a cup sleeve event! The closest one to me is almost 4 hours away. 😂 It's amazing that there was so many people! Ahhh, our Ateez are famous~! ✨

The lack of Korean fans blows my mind every single time I think about it. They have been so beloved globally from day one (and even before day one) but they still don't have that in their own country. It's insane! I'm glad they've embraced the 'global idol' title though. Everytime i hear it in an interview intro I'm like 'at least Korea knows they're truly loved elsewhere'. But the way they do sooooo much for K-tiny and still can't get the traction. It's crazy. No one is doing more.

Guerilla is such a good MV! What a great introduction! And it sounds so cool~ I really love that their songs span genres. I feel like there must be four or five different styles in Halazia alone. (Also, I agree. I'm typically not into summery, softer songs or slower ballads. But I actively listen to all of Ateez's songs. In fact, some of my consistent faves fit right into this category!)

Their story/lore is incredible. Sometimes I feel like I understand everything less than most of the members (😂) but I'm alllll about it! It's so cool that they have this one arc. That it's been the same story this whole time. Truly amazing. Concept kings. I'm gonna need a film one day. It's all so cinematic and intriguing.

Ateez, Stray Kids, and Taemin is an AMAZING (and very tempting) line up. But you should definitely hold out. Because then you get to see Ateez for 3 hours and that's 🥰🥺. And you know they actually know what a 'world tours' is. So, it's just a waiting game!

I saw them in London. It's always London for me!

Yessss, I did see the stats! They're grown so much, even in six months. And the first day sales looked amazing! I've been streaming on Spotify and having a great old time. Really, Atiny have done so well. Especially with buying passes for Korean platforms. It was so cute when Wave was number one because everyone was practicing. 🥺

I hope voting goes well and they win most of the music show awards they'll be up for. I want them to see that their efforts pay off at home!

Haha I don't know what questions you'd even ask me really. Best livestream where they were all decending into madness? The best Seonghwa third wheeling Woosan vlive? The closest Hongjoong came to just being DONE with looking after the 99s? 😂😂 Yessss, I'm always ready to chat Ateez tbh. They're the only group I've kept up with the whole time. 🧡

Have you watched their Treasure Film series/show on YouTube yet? I was rewatching it the other day and I forgot how much I love it! So gooood! And funny! 😂

Ah this took ages to answer lol - sorry; I was rearranging my room this weekend 🙃 and my app never notifies me of asks.

Anyways, yeah the cupsleeve was so nice. I'm lucky to live on one side of a pair of decently sized cities with a diverse population here, so we get a handful of nice events (one of the local gay bars hosts a kpop night monthly, for example).

I've been to a cupsleeve for Taemin, Stray Kids, and then I helped my friend host one for OnlyOneOf - they were all really fun but did not even begin to prepare me for the intensity of the Ateez one. I was baffled; the Skz one was held at the same location and it was a graveyard by comparison. I didn't take many pictures bc I was caught up chatting and there was no way to take them without a ton of people in the photo lol - but these are the few from the event;

I agree with you, regarding the global idol title; I think it's really well deserved and is serving them well. They really deserve more notice in KR though; it sucks that they get overlooked just bc of not being a Big 4; if anything people should pay more attention since those are the hidden gems, you know?

Bouncy has a kpop sort of vibe to it though, moreso than some of the other title tracks of theirs I've heard, so hopefully folks pay a little more attention this time around. I heard they got their first win for Bouncy this morning though! So that's something positive.

Halazia was unbelievable; I was impressed when I heard it and even moreso when I saw the m/v. I finally sat down and listened to their entire discography this weekend while doing cleaning and realized I genuinely can't find a skip song with them for the most part. 😭

Also yes!! 100% on a movie - this would make an amazing full length film or hell, even a miniseries; it's such a complex and well written storyline. I'm mad I didn't pick up the diary version of Outlaw bc I need to know what happens next. (I have all 3 versions coming but they won't be here for a while bc they're being sent with my albums from SHINee's comeback at the end of June; I could only afford one of their albums from the store here bc they were so much more expensive than they are in the KR shop I use. >.<)

Seeing the way atiny treat the group and each other and work together is so heartwarming. It's interesting, to have it be largely on the international fans' shoulders to push them to the spotlight in both the wider world and KR; but the teamwork is super fun to see. I haven't been this actively involved in a kpop fandom since I quit doing it for my og group (just stuck mostly to the sidelines, reblogging pretty pictures, etc for my other groups) - but I'm enjoying it so much more so far; I don't feel the same kind of guilty pressure that I've felt elsewhere.

They have so much content too holy - I've been trying to catch up and I feel like I haven't even scraped the surface yet lol - Every time I think I've managed to finish one section I realize there's x or y other things I missed lol. I did not even know the Treasure Film series existed until you mentioned it 😂 - but it looks like M2 did it; I love the games/variety type shows that company has done, so I'm eager to watch it! Thank you for mentioning it!

Rn I'm working my way through Wanteez between the new stuff for these promotions; these guys have done so many variety series jfc lol.

Also Woosan. Bless those two. They are so dumb. I love them so much. I would like to point out, that I did not want them. I specifically pointed out San to my friend when we watched Guerrilla and said "anyone but that one". (He startled me by resembling someone in an unsettling way when I first glanced at him and I didn't like it lol - he doesn't resemble said person now that I recognize them all tho thankfully).

But I apparently had no say in him, since he was the one that kept sticking out in everything and his personality is exactly what I gravitate to in a bias (the big oaf with a loud mouth and a heart of gold, always a little confused but he's got the spirit, scary duality) -- normally I do find a second bias within a few months that vibes with my first, but I didn't even get a say in that since not only did San tell me 'no, I'm right here and you're going to pay attention to me', he did it while dragging that scrappy little devil along by the hand V_V I couldn't just adopt him without Woo. (I was quite disgruntled about that one too - I don't bias visuals or dancers dammit - I have avoided them in most of my groups so far.

Plus! Where's my rapper bias??? I thought I'd add HJ as my second but nope, instead I get the 'friends as far as the altar' Tom and Jerry pair and 6 bias wreckers since none of them can stay in their damn lane for more than a few minutes at a time. 😂 (My friend said that'd happen tho so I can't say I wasn't warned).

(Do you have a bias btw? A favorite mv or performance I (likely) may have missed?)

[queen-boudicca]

Happy doctor who day everyone!! Next up in the nuwho rewatch is dalek!

(I'm also changing the "did i cry" bit to "did someone die" bc i don't cry often enough for that to be interesting and I've always meant to go through every dw episode and see what ones nobody dies in. People die in all the previous episodes, so I'm not going to go back and edit those)

Bechdel test pass: yes (rose and the soldier)

Did someone die: yes

Ooh the museum

Slitheen arm

Cyberman!

God nine has just the most desolate tone of voice and when he says "I'm getting old" aaagh

Theme song!

BAD WOLF ONE DESCENDING MY BELOVED

I like Goddard ngl

Like sure she's a henchperson for an ultra capitalist billionaire and is fine with the torturing of sapient beings but on the other hand she's funny so

Love that musical instrument that plays three whole notes

This is unrealistic bc Statten would not be specifying they're English; he'd just say British, even if they were Irish

Ooh here it comes

ArjdhfjafhfjjfsjfajgsjrasjftjafjajfatiatjssjtgksgkzgkstksjtsjfsfjsfsjfjafksfksfjsjsfsgkkgsstjjstgkskgssfksfkgkssjfsfjjfskgsgkszfkzgkgkskgsgksjfzfnahdafjskgzgmsgksfksyksktskgskgskgsjfsktsktgjatajtskfsjfjskgskgsjgskgsktsktsgksgksskggksgksgkstksgskkgsgksgmsnfDBAFJW

I'm fine

"I watched it happen; i made it happen!" I'm fine

"You destroyed us?" "...I had no choice" I'm fine

"And what of the time lords?" I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine guys I'm totally fine

His acting I'm

I can't

Wow van Statten you're super intimidating 10/10

God i love Rose's tank top so much

Adam, trying to impress Rose: aliens exist

Rose, who thinks he's hot: wow really?

Stkjrajfs i forget Adam said fantastic

Yeah nine maybe don't tell them you're an alien when they've been shown willing to imprison living sapient beings

But i mean you do you

God van Statten is such a bitch

Ngl the dalek was really smart and good at manipulating rose

They were like "hmm she's a friend of the doctor. I've got it just get her to feel bad for me" and it worked

Love the calculating of a thousand billion combinations like okay yeah sure but can it press the buttons that fast? Also why doesn't it lock after a certain number of incorrect attempts? 

No not the west coast! That's where I live!

Speaking of which, glad to hear some good American accents

Love how he's like "you've got to kill it now" but like, they obviously can't

Yay Goddard for caring at least a little bit about the people the dalek is murdering

Good job Adam taunting the great big alien death machine

I really like this soldier. Sure hope nothing bad happens to her

Oh

Rose and Adam literally keep fucking running why are you just standing there

The electrocution was honestly a brilliant move like this dalek is smart

This is the episode where the daleks are most intimidating and best done

But like seriously though every time they bring back the daleks there's more and more of them and it just makes them less and less intimidating bc none of them can ever shoot for shit or do anything clever and they all fall for obvious bullshit traps (revolution of the daleks, anyone?) But like. This is how to do it. One dalek casually murders everyone in an entire base and it's clear it's toying with them. Like it could've just shot them all but instead it activates the sprinklers and electrocutes them all. It's (a) smart and (b) showing off. (Plus that way when they come back in big numbers for the finale it's actually intimidating and not just like oh okay look another army of daleks just like the last dalek episode) Rob shearman write every dalek episode when

Goddard so obviously wants to murder van Statten good for her

The dalek standing in the rain while doctor tells it to kill itself and the dalek tells him he'd make a good dalek is something that can be so personal

Unlike the other times a dalek tells him he'd make a good dalek, where it's just something they just say bc ooh we're so edgy, this one actually works and makes sense and has an impact. Like the doctor just told the dalek he killed all of the time lords just to rid the universe of the daleks; and the dalek is like "that's a lot of hatred there" like fuck if that didn't hit the doctor right the fuck in the chest damn

(And makes all the times they have a dalek arbitrarily say that to the doctor later feel even more hollow and useless by comparison but you don't need me to tell you that moffat sucks)

Anyway rip rose lol

Nine going off on van Statten is something that can be so personal

"I wanted to touch the stars" "you just wanted to drag the stars down and stick them underground underneath tons of sand and dirt, and label them"

Now the dalek having an identity crisis

Dammit doc really you're just gonna let the dalek out? Not a great plan

"Broken, broken, hair dryer"

Goddard is low-key hoping for the dalek to kill van Statten and same tbh (but it's more poetic what happens so)

God rose is so kind

The little tentacle reaching for the sun aww

Rose arguing with nine about killing the dalek is something that can be so personal

Love it when a companion takes moral issue with something the doctor does and argues with them and changes their mind

"Isn't that better?" "Not for a dalek"

This whole scene is just. I don't even have a word for the feelings I'm feeling

(God remember when over a decade later they wrote a story about the most ethical way to execute living beings and managed to fuck that up)

"Are you frightened, Rose Tyler?" "Yes" "so am I" I'm fine

Yay Goddard "some place beginning with s" girlboss

God this episode is so good

Anyway, up next is the long game, the title of which i had to look up bc i forgot it so that bodes well

[esmerulia-chantelle]

When You Say Nothing At All

Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader

Summary: Azul's been thinking how lucky he was to have someone like you. Even without words, your actions always show just how much you truly love him.

Notes: Established relationship. Reader referred to as sweetheart.

A/N: Inspired from the song of the same title. 🥹🥹🥹

A repost from my old blog @escha-evenstar.

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart

Azul liked to think he was a very capable man. He was quite intelligent and confident in his skills. A calculating man who always has a plan. It was how he earned his position as Housewarden of Octavinelle and how he was able to open his own restaurant inside the school.

He lived a busy life. Fulfilling his responsibilities as a student. Attending meetings and doing certain tasks as a housewarden. Being a manager and handling business at the Mostro Lounge. He definitely has a lot on his plate, especially right now with the major exams coming up. Add in his housewarden duties, increased consultations, and then the Lounge getting busier. Work just seemed to pile one after another at an increased rate, wearying him down.

Azul let out a soft sigh as he finally finished working on an important document. He gently set the pen down before slowly turning his head to look at his side.

Right there sitting beside him was you. His beloved. His sweetheart. His romantic partner.

Without saying a word, you can light up the dark

Azul was proud to say that you were the most pleasant change in his life. You made him feel happy. You made him feel loved. You made him feel safe. You were everything to him.

As his eyes trailed over your form, he noticed how cozy you looked, sitting with your legs up on the comfy chair that he specifically bought just for you while leaning against his side as you read your book. He felt his heart pound at the sight of you so close and comfortable with him.

Try as I may, I can never explain

Azul was a busy man and sometimes he couldn't help but feel guilty because of it. He felt that he was lacking as your partner because he couldn't always spend time with you as much as you want. Yet, you always stayed with him. Saying it was okay and that you understand. And that you'll always be by his side no matter what.

What I hear when you don't say a thing

He remembered that one moment during the early times of your relationship. Azul was suddenly swamped with things to do and had to reschedule your date. He felt terrible at having to do so, but you still smiled at him and said that it was alright. You then asked him if it was okay for you to hangout in the VIP Room with him while he worked. It had him confused. As much as he enjoys your company, he didn't want to bore you with just sitting there while he was busy working. You could be doing something else. Something more fun and enjoyable, and maybe in the company of others, but you said wanted to stay with him. You wanted to be around him even if it was just sitting in the same room in silence.

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me

Azul could never forget the bright smile on your face when he agreed to that. The way you suddenly jumped into his arms for a hug and his face a blushing mess as you beamed up at him. He saw how extremely happy you were with the idea of simply being together. You always loved being in his presence, and Azul loved being in yours as well. It was euphoric for Azul to know how much you were delighted to be with him.

There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me

You were honestly too good to be true. Azul sometimes wondered why you even chose him instead of the other people around you. As if hearing his thoughts, your head turned to look up at him and he could see the surprise in your eyes. His eyes gazed at your pretty ones and you stared back at him. It was as if you were trying to figure out what the other was thinking. Then Azul saw your lips curve into a smile. That gorgeous smile of yours that always made his heart leap. And in your eyes, he saw the complete and utter love you always had for him.

The touch of your hand says you'll catch me wherever I fall

Your hand made its way to cup his cheek. When your skin touched his, Azul couldn't help but place his bare hand on top of yours as he leaned against your gentle touch and closed his eyes in relief. Moments like this reminded Azul of how much you truly loved him. That despite the ups and downs in life, you will always stay by his side.

You say it best

Azul opened his eyes slowly, revealing the blue irises that you always thought and said were pretty. Your face was the same as before, looking at him with a loving expression from the way your eyes gazed adoringly and the way your lips smiled warmly at him. It made him want to kiss you.

And he did.

He kissed you with all of his heart. He poured all his love and devotion for you into that sweet yet passionate kiss. And when you kissed him back with the same passion, his worries were gone in an instant. All that was left were the sparks and fireworks setting in his heart, knowing that you'll always love him as much as he'll always love you, even—

...when you say nothing at all.

Masterlist here!

If you enjoyed this: likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. Thank you for reading!

[ghostjelliess]

One time, I was chatting with an old friend and prom got brought up, we were nearly a decade out of school at the time. Anyway, she said "yeah, it was weird that you just started dancing with those random boys that crashed it with those [our closest thing to popular girls], but we knew you liked to dance, it was just weird." and I absolutely lost it as I realized that I'd never paused to explain anything to my friends at the time.

Imagine, 2009, the awkward girls who are so unimpressed by boys their age, dedicated to angsty boy bands, GPAs, and future dreams, and among them is the overworked poor girl who usually cares for her siblings, finally getting a night off after changing into her prom dress in a van. She's either quiet or obnoxious, zero scale for in-betweens, and her beloved friends she's trying to make dance with her shoo her off jokingly, only to see her crash into her jock soccer teammates (we didn't really have bad cliques, tbh, but pretend), who brought their cool dates from another school because they go to parties and meet peers outside their bubble, so cool. And to their shock, surprise, and maybe horror, their over-active dance-y friend has roped these mysterious dates into her circle. They've lost control of her, what can they do but watch her make a fool in front of the cool girls and boys they never aspired to be—but disliked on the principle of being unfamiliar and having no common ground.

And then, finally, a slow song played. Their weirdo friend returned, and they exhaled a collective sigh of relief and dragged her to the other prom activities, determined not to let her near the dance floor again.

And I had to sit our late-20-something-year-old asses down as she reminisced, absolutely cackling, and explain to her that I knew them. They weren't strangers to me.

I'd gone to school with those dumb boys since we were seven and they were neither suave nor cool, and in fact one of them had worn the same hat for so long, and refused to wash it, that he gave the whole 4th grade class lice, and the other lived down the street from my house and we had matching knee scars from biffing the same dumb skateboard jump that someone's dad never should have built us. They'd kicked me out of their treehouse when it was too crowded, but also lifted me onto the roof of the abandoned building across the street in Sandlot style feats to retrieve the soccer ball/ football/ baseball, and we'd been to so many school-sponsored events that I could pick out their lunchboxes and overnight camp pjs if i had to. Lol, I knew their moms. Their families still live by my parents back home like a frickin' Hallmark movie.

I had to remind her how I transferred high schools sophomore year and draw up a whole timeline of moving schools, and she was just like "ohhhhhh. Wow, honestly, you did just appear at school one day. At prom, we thought you were drunk. Except Ashley. Ashley thought you were secretly cool."

I was still laughing, but also shook at how deviating reality can be. Like bro, they were that concerned but never asked??? It is so strange to think how much you can peripherally know about a person, like how I know everything about the kid versions of those guys, but I have no idea who they are today. Like, I could pass them in the street when I go back home and maybe recognize them, but probably not. But my friend who I still talk to has no concept of my life before I met her at our shared school or beyond our shared experiences. It's wild.

No wonder making adult friends is hard. It's weird to get to know new people when old people remember shoving you into a broken window to get a Frisbee and ripping your back open, when you don't have to explain yourself because they were there for it all. But it's also kinda sad cus those are usually the best stories to retell. I'm not someone who will track those guys down just to say "hey remember when..." But it's strange to hear the juxtaposition of reality from a close friend who maybe isn't that close. In that moment I realized how much more effort I put into understanding her and communicating with her. Now, I'm seen as strange and outgoing and secretly crazy, but really I just remember the details they forgot, the parts of myself the assumed or dismissed or didn't care enough about to clarify their judgements.

It was so funny at the time, looking back on our prom nearly a decade out, but now, five years later, I'm a little haunted by it. I was the only one seeking connection, interested in their lives, curious about who they were becoming as they grew, and they were only interested in having a weird, crazy friend who danced with strangers and got drunk at prom.

There's no moral of the story here, I'm just working out how to make friends now that I'm in my 30s and moved so far from what was home. Why are adults so scared of connecting, they say it takes so much energy and effort, but when I meet them as strangers, they share all their secrets, from California to Washington, to Michigan, to Rhode Island. It's cross cultural. It's weird. Open up, tell your stories, be interesting. Let people friend you. New people help us evolve and listen to the newest version of our best stories. I want to hear about your matching scars and old friends who broke your heart more than any first love ever could. I don't know why empathy becomes so scary to us as adults, I just know that I want to connect with people, but whether it's a product of moving so much in my 20s or where I'm living now, or my generation group, I'm finding a lot of people are extremely attached to the people who know them as they are, with no room for new people who might learn them as they want to become. I think we need both... maybe I'm wrong. I dunno. Adult friends are hard.

[dreaminpetals]

💐 COMMISSION: fem s/o's wedding with andrew (sfw & nsfw) 💐

thank you so much for the commission! please consider checking out my emergency commissions here ! i hope you enjoy !

SFW ;;

♡ Andrew has always longed to marry somebody. Being a religious man, he's dreamed of filling a church with people who are dear to him as his beloved bride walks down the aisle.

♡ He's only glanced at weddings, an outsider looking in. The brides and grooms having the best nights of their lives made his heart feel fuzzy. Nobody would ever dare to wed him, but the idea was certainly a pleasant one. It helped him sleep. It comforted him when he needed it most. He wanted to look down at his hands and see a ring that reminded him someone out there loves him.

♡ He grew up with not even a penny to his name, so he knows having a luxurious wedding would be completely out of the picture for someone like him. Until he met you.

♡ You helped him get back on his feet and the two of you worked together to save up enough money for a wedding ceremony and reception, along with a honeymoon.

♡ Most honeymoons are spent lazing by the beach, but due to his body being constantly at war with sunlight, you decided to book a trip to a lovely cabin hidden away in the woods, a private place for just the two of you.

♡ He honestly thought you'd end up getting married in Red Church, surrounded by cobwebs and broken glass, but you insisted that you two would find a way to escape the manor and you'd have a proper wedding.

♡ It took months of promises and longing, but the seal keeping everyone trapped in the manor finally snapped and let everybody escape. You took Andrew's hand that day and promised him that a brighter future was upon you.

♡ Your wedding was surprisingly inexpensive. Despite your days in the manor being long gone, many of the survivors stayed in touch with you and were more than willing to help. You don't need to hire a whole team of wedding planners with the survivors by your side.

♡ Michiko and Violetta teamed up to sew you the most gorgeous dress you had ever laid eyes on.

♡ Emma designed your bouquet and enveloped the chapel in beautiful flowers.

♡ Norton prepared your rings using the finest gems he could find.

♡ Margaretha found the most wonderful songs to play and arranged dances.

♡ Vera styled your hair and Fiona did your makeup.

♡ Victor handled the invitations and did a fantastic job. So on and so forth.

♡ You and Andrew were on good terms with almost everyone, so they were all pumped to see how your wedding would play out. It was the greatest team effort they put into anything since the escape of the manor.

♡ You two had lots of practicing to do before the actual wedding. For one, Andrew didn't know table manners. You'd have to lovingly teach him gestures like how to cut his meat and how to do a toast before even daring to eat at the reception.

♡ Dancing together in your rooms was what Andrew enjoyed the most, though. Margie planned several dance routines, so you had triple the practicing to do when it came to dancing.

♡ Andrew was surprisingly agile during fast-paced dances, he loved to twirl you in the air like in a movie and dip you so low you thought you were going to crash into the ground. Each yelp only spurred him to play with you more, drinking up your reactions and getting all giddy because it's you.

♡ As for slow dancing with Mister Kreiss? You're so lucky to say you're familiar with it. He hums along to whatever music you play in the background, and puts so much love into every step or twirl that you feel like your heart might burst. It's agony waiting to dance with him in a suit and dress rather than your pajamas.

♡ You're blown away when you see the wedding venue for the first time. It's pure white with shades of red sprinkled in, the same colours Andrew has hated about himself now repurposed to be something he'd look at fondly for the rest of his life. It was beautiful. Like him.

♡ You noticed a chair with an unfamiliar name on it. When you asked Andrew who it belonged to, he answered that it was for his late mother. She would have loved to come, he said.

♡ He doesn't take the day of the wedding very well. What do you mean he can't see you until the ceremony?! He wants to greet you, kiss you, practice some extra dance moves to be extra sure... he's grumpy while the guys of the manor dress and hype him up.

♡ "Alright, let's do this! THREE CHEERS FOR OUR MAN ANDREW!" William would cheer so loudly the girls would hear it from the other side of the church and burst out into laughter.

♡ Andrew couldn't stop his hands from shaking, though. His lifelong dreams were finally being realized. The love of his life was going to marry him tonight. Willingly. He could barely believe it.

♡ As for you? You're brimming with excitement at the idea of walking down the aisle and shooting an arrow of love straight into Andrew's heart. The girls are envious of you as they powder your face and tighten the seams of your dress.

♡ "I remember when you first met that boy," Michiko would say to you as she styled your dress, beaming at you through the mirror. "You were too shy to even speak to one another... ah, young love."

♡ It took a million checks to make sure you were ready to present yourself to everybody. Your hair, makeup, dress, veil, bouquet... everything had to be absolutely perfect. It was a bit difficult having so many girls look after you, because Tracy's idea of perfect was a little bit different than Michiko's. There was a lot of playful arguing, but you knew they just wanted this day to be flawless for you.

♡ Once the petals were strewn down the halls and the bridesmaids and groomsmen made their appearances, you finally presented yourself.

♡ It took everything in Andrew to not fall to his knees when he saw you. You were angelic, your white dress cascading down your back with a stunning hairstyle he's never seen you in before. Your bouquet was made of all your favourite flowers, and he could see the perfect shade of lipstick beneath your vail. You captured Andrew's heart as he leaned onto Luca's shoulder for support.

♡ Andrew wasn't the only one who had his breath taken away. Practically everyone was gawking at you. It made Andrew feel a little... possessive, seeing everyone's eyes on you. He was going to be marrying you. Not José, not Norton, not Victor but him.

♡ All of his negative feelings disappeared the moment you were in arms reach. He extended an arm to take your hand as you gladly obliged. When he felt the fabric of your dress against his wrist, electricity shot through his body for a second time.

♡ Being able to see Andrew up close was a dream come true. His usual matted hair was thoroughly washed and brushed, it appeared as if José had lent him a hand. His usual flower was still present even as he wore a breathtaking suit. He smelled like cologne and looked so nervous but in love... you couldn't wait to finally kiss your groom.

♡ His hands trembled as he lifted your veil to reveal your features to him. You flashed him a grin and he felt his heart explode. He danced his fingers along your cheeks until they met your shoulders, which he gave an affectionate pat before turning to the priest.

♡ He had Helena help him with his vows. He wanted to blow you away, to use words you didn't think he knew. It took him days to memorize the words of love he was going to bestow upon you. You overheard him talking to himself a few times, but never guessed they were his vows.

♡ He also has some trouble with words of affection. Andrew much prefers to hold you or do favours for you.

♡ "When I first met you, I didn't think I was worthy of love. It's still hard to believe, but... I promise to return to you every affectionate gesture you give to me. I'll love you always and forever, as my angelic wife. I want to grow old with you. I vow to protect you, adore you, and care for you as long as I'm your husband. Our hearts will always be melded together and nothing will ever change that. Thank you for saving me. I love you."

♡ His vows brought some of the survivors to tears. Most of them only knew Andrew as that really quiet guy who hid behind his girlfriend a lot, so to see him spill his heart out for you made the crowd let out a sea of "awwwh"'s.

♡ His face turned scarlet and he almost wanted to run out of the building and hide once he finished speaking. He stumbled over and mispronounced a few words, but you could tell he put his whole heart into it and he meant every word he said.

♡ When he's finally able to kiss you, Andrew dips you low and assaults your entire face with kisses, treading past your lips. He doesn't care about smudging your makeup or embarrassing you, you're finally his wife and he just wants to feel your face after waiting all day to.

♡ The cheers once you become man and wife are astounding. When you tossed the bouquet it was caught by Eli and Gertrude.

♡ Demi helped to bake an enormous cake, one that's almost as tall as you. On top were little toppers meant to look like you and Andrew that you kept as mementos.

♡ The reception was definitely more of a party than the wedding was. Antonio and Margie played music for everyone to dance along to, and a karaoke session was held as well.

♡ Andrew was a little stressed out by how much noise there was, but you reminded him everyone there loved him and he melted. He's not used to all this positive attention.

♡ Your heart burst when he extended an arm and asked you to dance. You had been practicing for so long that when you finally attended the real event, it felt like a dream.

♡ For just a few minutes, nothing existed but Andrew's arms around you and the elegant music brought to you by a live band.

♡ Once all the food is eaten and gifts are exchanged, everyone bids you farewell. The girls cry when they hug you and the guys all pat Andrew on the back, wishing him good luck for... what couples do on their wedding night.

♡ When you two finally arrive home, Andrew is exhausted. He's never been to such a crowded event before, especially one where he's the main focus.

�� He'd need to lay his head in your lap and relax as he plays with your dress. The fabric felt so pleasing under his fingers. He was so in love with every part of you. He needed to be as close to you as possible after being kept from you, and from being in public with you. He cherished alone time like this.

♡ Once he's rested up, you'd have to unpack all your gifts! Each survivor and hunter gifted you something for your domestic life with Andrew. Matching mugs, blankets, cutlery, paintings... you were drowning in presents.

♡ It took an hour, but you finally unwrapped and stored everything away.

♡ Which leads to...

NSFW ;;

♡ You and Andrew have had sex before. Maaany times. He views it as making up for lost time, it helps with his insecurities, and he enjoys making you feel good. Andrew will do everything in his power to make sure the lovemaking on your wedding night is nothing short of magical.

♡ When you're settled at home and can't think of any more chores to do, Andrew is more anxious than he's ever been. His face is red in a furious blush and he's barely able to muster a sentence as he stands stiffly, lustful eyes on you.

♡ He knows what couples are meant to do on their wedding nights, and he's so excited to make your wishes come true, but this poor boy has no idea how to initiate things. Whenever you make love, it's because he's visibly horny but too anxious to say anything so you take care of him.

♡ You approached your husband, arms wrapping around his shoulders as you stared up into his eyes. He didn't look at you or respond to your inquiry of whether he's okay or not. The growing tent in his pants spoke for itself.

♡ Your eyes widened when you felt his erection brush against your thigh. He could tell that you felt his arousal ー because he hoisted you up bridal style and pressed an openmouthed kiss to your lips. He was going to take you, and he was going to do it right.

♡ His sudden burst of confidence lead to him carrying you to your bedroom, and he gave you another kiss before gently placing you down on the bed.

♡ Andrew wouldn't know what to do next. He wants you eat you out for hours but... your dress is in the way. And he doesn't feel like taking it off just yet. No, he wants to take his sweet time with you. It's your wedding night, after all.

♡ His solution? Dry humping. He's always adored being able to rut against you like a wild animal, and getting to do so in your elegant wedding gear has him rearing to go. He doesn't want to soil your gown, no, he just wants to do something absolutely filthy in attire that's meant to be for a ceremony all about you.

♡ He would spread your legs as far as they possibly could go in your dress. When he hikes your dress up to your lower stomach and finally sees the sweet dessert laid out just for him, he's bucking his hips into the cold air for any sense of relief.

♡ He'd press his clothed cock against your panties and see stars. His lovely wife was so close to him but so far... he wasn't sure how long he could last like this.

♡ Andrew ground against you in a frenzy, arms snaking around your back as his face nestled itself in the crook of your neck, sucking sweet little kisses onto the flesh. He groaned when he rubbed against you just right, aiming to hit the same spots over and over again.

♡ He wouldn't let your needs go unnoticed. Andrew would angle himself to rub against your clit, and he'd pay special attention to your neck as he desperately got himself off with your body.

♡ The low groan that escaped from his lips as he came into his boxers went straight to between your legs. As he rode out his high, he'd push your panties aside and finish you off with his fingers before pulling away. Something about cumming before even getting his clothes off made him growl with need. And it made him desire you even more than he already did; skin to skin this time.

♡ Andrew asked you to undress him. You felt him shudder underneath you as you removed his suit and got him out of his pants. Stripping him reminded you that beneath all the cologne and hair gel, it was still your Andrew. His scarred body yearned for yours and you were more than happy to press a chaste kiss to his chest once he was undressed, your way of telling him you loved him.

♡ Your husband would ask you to sit in his lap, right on top of his aching boner just begging to be touched, and grind against it as he undid the several seams on your back.

♡ Andrew loves mirrors. He doesn't like seeing himself in them, but you? He could watch you be undressed through a mirror all day long. He thinks his hands look good when they're unbuttoning the fabric keeping him from you.

♡ You looked so radiant that Andrew would need to fuck you in front of a mirror just to truly see you.

♡ He would take his sweet time with you, for every untied string he would thrust up to grind against your clothed pussy and nibble your shoulders. Hearing you mewl in his lap causes his hands to fumble as he undresses you. He wondered just how someone could be so cute every time a moan is pulled from your throat.

♡ Andrew felt a little dejected once your dress was ready to come off. He would miss seeing you in it.

♡ ...Those feelings didn't last long, though. The moment he laid eyes on your bare body he was surging with confidence and hunger.

♡ "You look so ravishing... my... my wife..." he muttered, mostly to himself. It appeared he was still in disbelief that you were a wedded couple. Throughout the night he'd periodically mumble to himself that you were his wife, or he'd call you Mrs Kreiss. It had a lovely ring to it.

♡ Andrew wants ー no, needs ー to taste you after being away from you for so long. He would eat you out like a man starved.

♡ Positioning his face between your thighs, Andrew licked a sloppy stripe up your pussy, stopping right below your clit. Then he'd lick back down, avoiding the place where you needed him most. Your frustrated groans earned a soft chuckle from Andrew. He wanted to draw this out... he was in a playful mood.

♡ He massaged your thighs as he teased your folds, finally pulling away to ask you the question that would be the death of you. "Tell me what you want, my... wife..." his voice dropped in volume when he reached your title. He didn't care in that moment how cheesy it sounded, this was the ultimate night to be sappy with his angel.

♡ "Enough teasing, Andrew, please... eat me out," you'd weep through gritted teeth as your husband nibbled your thighs and nodded his head in response your pleas.

♡ Now that he's gotten you riled up for him (he wants to feel needed), he's not holding back. Andrew is the king of being unintentionally rough. He'd leave your core battered from how deep his licks are and how his chin smacks against your soft flesh.

♡ The moment Andrew feels you contract and twitch around him, he's slipping a wet finger into your walls to torture you further. He won't stop his ministrations even as you cum hard around him.

♡ He's extra passionate for your wedding night which translates into him not giving you a break. He doesn't want to pull away from your pussy, he wants to keep his head burrowed between your legs for as long as he possibly can. His tongue is going to commit every inch of you to memory tonight.

♡ If you really want to make this night worth your while, tackle Andrew once you feel overwhelmed and turn the tables on him.

♡ He loves when you take control and take him by surprise. One minute he was devouring you, and the next you've pushed his back against the headrest and you're lowering your head dangerously close to his cock.

♡ He wants you to feel good even as you suck him off, so Andrew will finger you while your lips are wrapped around his dick. He'll angle himself so the palm of his hand rubs against your sensitive nub. It drives him wild how sloppy your strokes and licks are when you're on the verge of cumming.

♡ He'd prefer to cum in your mouth. It's an intimate night, he doesn't want you to be completely covered in his seed just yet. He'd rather save that for the honeymoon.

♡ Chest heaving against your back, Andrew's next move is to pull you into his lap again. Remember how much he loves mirrors? He'll seat you right on his cock and direct your face with his hands to look right into the mirror across from your bed.

♡ "My wife," he'd murmur into your shoulder before snapping his hips into yours.

♡ Having Andrew's mouth so close to your ears means you'll get to hear every gasp and purr that he emits. And he makes a lot of quiet noises he tries to hide.

♡ Andrew made sure to cup a hand around your breasts and kiss your neck & lips as well. He wants to surround you. He wants all of your senses to be overtaken by him until you can't function.

♡ He would whisper praise into your ear, telling you how beautiful you look and how good you feel around him. It's not like him to be this bold and dominant but you're loving it.

♡ Andrew asked to cum inside you that night. When he finally reached his climax, he lifted you up so he could admire the string of cum connecting the husband to his wife. He was addicted to the sight and made sure to capture it in his memories for as long as he could.

♡ After several more rounds of rough licks and hard thrusts, Andrew would want something more soft and classic with you.

♡ Gently lowering you onto the mattress, Andrew would hover over you and press a tender kiss to your lips. With one long thrust, he'd fill you right up and stay like that, your hands connecting.

♡ His thrusts would be slow and sensual, making love to you rather than just fucking you. Don't be surprised if you feel hot tears drop onto your shoulders. This is one of the most sentimental moments of Andrew's whole life.

♡ Your tongues would dance as your lips locked in an intense kiss, you can tell how desperately he's trying to last and make this feel good for you.

♡ Andrew quickly repositioned himself to hit that spot inside of you. He's committed the location to memory, and wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't relentlessly batter it tonight.

♡ Your sudden gasps caused his thrusts to grow frantic, his hot breath fanning onto your neck as he plowed you into the mattress.

♡ You could feel his smirk on your skin when you began to pulse around him.

♡ "Good girl..." he would purr, rubbing circles on the back of your hand as you rode out your high. Hearing your cries of pure ecstasy pushed Andrew over the edge, and he emptied himself into you. You had never felt so stuffed before.

♡ Once you've decided you had enough, Andrew's entire demeanour changes. Before, he was determined to push your limits and hear your cries, while now he's insisting that you take a bath. He feels awful that he ruined your hair and makeup, plus you're littered with hickeys and your thighs are stained with seed... he doesn't know that you wouldn't have it any other way.