#but one of the issues is I started it when I was sick with covid

[tblsomedoodles]

I think, after 2 years, I finally figured out how to draw his hair in a way that I like lol.

I have said this several times before but, I swear it is true this time.

This is technically for my DC/DP fic from a couple years ago. One that I recently updated b/c I realized I had picked at it enough that I had a full chapters.

[shanedoesdoodles]

Being ill and opening tumblr to see Covid is trending has got me. Worried!

[kira-akira]

What I Want You To Know About Long COVID

Well lads, I've been suffering from Long COVID for over a year now. My life is at a complete standstill. I'm 25 years old and I'm too sick to go back to school, I can't work, I had to move back in with my parents and I'm still stuck here.

Here are just a few things I wish people knew about Long COVID, including things I didn't know myself until I got it.

COVID destroys your immune system. Yes, even if you don't have Long COVID. Are you getting sick more often now? When you get sick, does it last longer? There are many studies showing that COVID causes t cell depletion, even in mild COVID cases! T cells are how your body remembers how to fight off infections you've had before so losing those cells? Bad news.

Your initial infection can be mild and you can still get Long COVID. Right from Yale Medicine, "Most people with Long COVID had mild acute COVID." (This is also a good link for a basic Long COVID overview).

There can be a gap of time between when you "get better" from the initial COVID infection to the onset of Long COVID symptoms. Some people get sick with an initial COVID infection and never get better. Some get better and then weeks or months later start developing Long COVID symptoms. Long COVID symptoms can even fluctuate over time, can go away for months and then suddenly come back.

So many people have Long COVID and don't realize it. Do you feel more tired lately but no matter how much you sleep, nothing helps? Is it harder to concentrate at work or school? Can you just not think like you used to? You could have Long COVID and not even know it. Even mild post-COVID symptoms are still Long COVID.

COVID can do anything to your body. Long COVID has over 200 recognized symptoms and can affect basically any part or system of your body. There is no one mechanism or cause of Long COVID which unfortunately also means there's no one cure either.

The effects of COVID are cumulative. Each COVID reinfection increases your chances of developing Long COVID. COVID is also affecting your body in other ways, yes, even if you're otherwise young and healthy! "Repeat COVID-19 infections increase risk of organ failure, death".

Once you have Long COVID, repeat COVID infections will make your symptoms worse. "80% [of Long COVID patients] saw their symptoms worsen [from reinfection]. In 60% of people who were in recovery or remission from Long COVID, reinfection caused a recurrence of Long COVID."

There is a lot more I want to say about Long COVID but I want to keep this post at least somewhat manageable to read. Like how when COVID is contracted during pregnancy, those COVID-exposed fetuses have a 6.3-fold increased risk of motor developmental delays, or that another study found 50% of babies exposed to COVID in utero had developmental delays.

You need to keep caring about COVID, for others around you and also for yourself even if you're "healthy". Everyone is at risk. And don't forget 40-60% of COVID infections are asymptomatic, which is why masking even if you feel fine is crucial. The only way right now to not get Long COVID is to not get COVID in the first place. It's not too late, if you've stopped masking it's never too late to start again! I know it's easy to get distracted by things in your life that seem more real than the possibility of getting sick some time in the future, and the peer pressure to not mask can be intense. But it only feels less real or less important until your entire life is having Long COVID. Trust me.

I know this is a complicated issue, many people can't afford to stay home when sick even if they want to because of their jobs, there are disgusting policies trying to ban wearing masks, but please if you can. Keep masking. Masking works, masking saves lives.

This post got a bit longer than I wanted so below the cut is a non-exhaustive list of my Long COVID symptoms and some of my experiences as one of the "healthy young people" who got "unlucky". cw brief mention of suicidal ideation.

Welcome to the Thunderdome that is my body with Long COVID. Keep in mind these are just my experiences and symptoms, Long COVID can cause any range of symptoms at varying severities.

Dysautonomia: Exercise intolerance, Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM), fatigue, and heat intolerance. What do those things mean? Here's some specific examples. Absolutely terrible circulation I am so cold all the time but also, if I get a little too warm I will pass out. Eating hot food makes my heart rate spike, I sweat, my body feels heavy. Blood pooling and pins and needles in my feet when I walk. Don't even think about exercising past walking, it's impossible. I used to work out an hour a day 4 times a week and now walking up one flight of stairs makes my heart pound and I can't breathe. Can't take even just warm showers anymore or I will pass out. Heat rashes from being in the sun for 10 minutes.

Digestive issues: Honestly too many to name but: constant bloating, extreme nausea, constipation, slow motility, lack of appetite, just so much cramping and pain. I lost 18 pounds from Long COVID, as someone who was already considered underweight their entire life, and almost had to get a shunt put into my chest to deliver nutrients because I was nearly completely unable to eat. For the first 6 months of Long COVID, if I could manage 600 calories a day, that was a good day.

Histamine intolerance: Oh boy. My worst symptoms, I don't even know where to start with it. If you know Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) it's very similar. I can only eat 19 foods. If i eat a single bite of something not on that list, it's 48 hours of absolute hell. Coughing, migraines, itchy eyes, such extreme nausea I cannot even describe it, panic/feeling of doom, racing heart rate, derealization, rash, uncontrollable muscle tremors. I only learned about histamine intolerance 5 months into having Long COVID so before that, I was experiencing these symptoms nearly every single day. Terrifying isn't even a strong enough word to describe how it felt to experience all this and have no idea what it was, how to stop it, or if it would ever stop. Really dark times.

Neurological issues: More of that derealization. Inability to concentrate. Anxiety. OCD-like symptoms such as thoughts getting "stuck" in my head, repeating 24/7 completely unable to stop them, genuinely felt like my brain had cracked open and I had lost my mind. Constant dizziness like I'm on a boat.

Sleep issues: I sleep like garbage. I have insomnia, I wake up dozens of times every night and every single time I sleep I have intensely vivid dreams. I can't sleep longer than 7 hours total no matter how exhausted I am. It is exhausting. I'm exhausted, I'm so so tired.

And finally. Just. Really intense suicidal ideation. My body, my health, my entire life has been stolen from me because someone else decided my life was worth less to them than wearing a mask or staying home if they feel sick. Before I got Long COVID, I was preparing to go to South Korea to teach English, then on to a PhD in neurolinguistics, I was supposed to meet my long distance partner and had already booked plane tickets when I got sick. All of that has been destroyed.

Most of us with Long COVID are stuck in a cycle of being extremely sick, then if you're lucky you'll slowly get better over months, just to get reinfected and go right back where you started or worse. Honestly, I'm not scared of dying from COVID. I'm scared of living for a long time, suffering from Long COVID the entire time. This isn't living.

I don't know how to end this now. I'm still fighting, I'm trying experimental treatments, I'm not giving up yet. I hope everyone reading this stays healthy and well.

[lastoneout]

Actually am still kinda pissed that my fiancé's psychatrist evaluated him for anxiety and said he didn't have it but then was like "in the future I'd like to see you make enough progress with your anxiety that you feel comfortable taking your mask(N95 not neurodivergent mask) off" and didn't seem to care when he explained that his fiancé(me) has several severe chronic illnesses and immune issues so we both do what we can to ensure I don't get sick with any illness, not just covid. Like does he have anxiety or not?? You can't have it both ways buddy!! And like it or not protecting a vulnerable person from getting sick is logical, YOU'RE the one being irrational here.

Like this is why I get pissed about mask(N95) stuff, people have legit fallen into some kind of thought-terminating cliché about covid and all other contagious diseases not being a problem anymore to the point that they think even sick people and their loved ones taking reasonable precautions to protect their health is a sign of anxiety and paranoia. I truly do not get it. Like it's one thing if you personally don't want to wear a mask(N95) but at least leave people who do alone, but legit acting like people like me are insane for doing something that makes perfect sense is turning me into the Joker. It doesn't even work to say "oh I have asthma and allergies and the air quality is bad today" or "I'm having an important surgery soon and need to make sure I don't get sick" like they think wearing a mask(N95) AT ALL in any circumstance for any reason means you've legit lost your mind.

I genuinely feel like the government suddenly started hiding all the national car crash statistics and insisted in tons of press conferences that crashing your car is actually perfectly fine and not a big deal at all and wearing a seatbelt isn't something healthy people need to worry about, so now everyone thinks it's silly to wear one and every time I do I have to deal with people implying or outright stating that I'm legitimately mentally ill and need an intervention.

[stephanidftba]

From Sharon Astyk on Facebook:

Folks, if you haven't been wearing a mask regularly or consistently, but who oppose this administration I want to encourage you to start (folks who have been wearing them all along, let this one go, because this isn't about you.)

I know, I know, you don't want to - you don't want to be harassed, you've had covid twice and it wasn't that bad, you aren't that worried, so why would you do that?

1. Wearing a mask in public means that people who are protesting masked are normalized. If there are many people wearing masks in public spaces, they can't identify who is resisting easily. If masks are a proxy for resistance, as governments are calling them, then it is rather like the story of King Christian of Denmark donning the yellow star. So if you want to protect and support resistors, you can mask.

2. We are on our own with disease protection. RFK jr has been very clear he plans to make vaccines incredibly inaccessible to most Americans. Right now there are circulating cases of measles, TB, mumps, covid and below the radar bird flu (yes, that too) as well as other stuff. No one is going to give you a vaccine to prevent disease. No one is going to tell you when you or your kids are exposed to measles or tuberculosis or bird flu. They are not testing, they are not recording data, they are not seeking to protect you. If you don't protect yourself, no one will.

While I strongly recommend everyone get any boosters or vaccines they need, in a society with low vaccination rates, and permeable vaccines that let some cases through and wane with time, a vaccine-only strategy is not viable. You cannot tell when you are exposed to these diseases, and you will just get sick, and some people will die.

No one is going to tell you when Bird flu starts spreading human to human on any scale. We will find out when a bunch of people get very sick and die - and I don't want you to be among them. No one is going to tell you when a kid has measles at your school in many states now, and you don't know if your vaccine from 30 years ago is still holding. 38% of cases in Ontario have been in vaccinated adults.

Vaccines and air cleaning and far UV light, and smaller classroom densities (yeah right) are all good tools, but the most reliable one is an N95 or equivalent mask.

3. The opinion of Trump, RFK jr and the rest of this administration is that disabled or medically vulnerable people should just die. They've been very clear, and we've seen it in how they cut support, research, to cancer, sickle cell disease, diabetes, alzheimers, etc... and how they talk about people with disabilities like autism.

They are rapidly and painfully stripping resources like SSDI, Medicaid, Special Education support programs and funding, research for rare cancers and diseases, testing that would let you know if your baby has a condition...you name it.

A 14 country study just showed that after 5 1/2 years of the pandemic, 25-30% of people who have covid have long covid. And we've known that was going to happen - that's almost exactly the same stats we've seen in other studies. By your third infection, your risk of long covid is up around 30%.

And while our support systems have been broken and fraying for a long time, they are simply DEAD now. You won't get SSDI. You won't get health care for your disability. You may not get treatment for your cancer. Your Alzheimers meds may not be covered. RFKjr thinks the answer to type 2 diabetes or mental health issues is a work camp.

We know that some viruses, including covid are oncogenic (the obvious one is the HPV virus, and the vaccine prevents cervical cancer perfectly), which means they up your risk of cancer. We know it increases your risk of dementia, and the rate at which dementia progresses. We know that covid can reactivate EBV and TB.

We also know that measles wipes your immune system for three years - including your vaccines. If you get measles, and you cannot get vaccinated again, you could die of diptheria, tetanus, mumps, etc...

You cannot afford to be newly disabled right now. They want people dead or unable to resist. DO NOT COMPLY IN ADVANCE. No one is protecting you from this. So protect yourself - this is as much a step as getting your passport or supporting your food pantry.

4. Because they are so clear that they have eugenicist intents towards disabled people, as well as non-white folks, wearing a mask is an act of solidarity with them.

Statistics have always shown that non-white people are more likely to wear masks than white folks, mostly because they know perfectly well that the safety net has a lot of huge holes in it. They are often worn by people who simply cannot afford to be sick.

Moreover immunocompromised and disabled people HAVE to mask. There are also people who physically CANNOT mask, who rely on others to mask to protect them. When you put on a mask, you do two things.

1. You stand with those who must or wish to mask, and practice community care. You make it clear those lives are more valuable than your convenience. Remember, they are counting on you not to believe that and let disabled people be first targets.

2. You make protest, activism and resistance safe and accessible for millions of people who otherwise cannot participate in standing up to our goverment. You help cross crucial thresholds for engagement by making resistance fully accessible.

My father, who is in his middle 70s and disabled, repeats the mantra regularly that these motherfuckers are not going to get to kill him, no matter how hard they try. That he has no intention of dying under Trump. He's going to stay alive and piss them off and fight back until he gets to piss on their graves.

If you want to do that, you have to wear mask. Its that simple. Masking is fighting back. Masking is solidarity. Masking protects you and everyone. Masking is resistance. Wear a mask in public.

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1FT62GK2av/

@covid-safer-hotties

[covid-safer-hotties]

Back in early 2020, the news of the strange illness causing terrible pneumonias in China saddened me, but I believed I was safe in Canada. Within weeks, there was a reckoning: thousands were dying on my doorstep, too.

Directors of an independent living residence at the start of the pandemic asked me to become the residence’s COVID-19 advisor. They had no qualified medical staff, despite supporting elderly residents. Back in those early days, anyone with a medical qualification was commandeered to help in any way they could.

Confronted with the task of providing guidance to the nonmedical staff taking care of these residents, I decided to learn everything I could about the pandemic. At that time, about 1,000 papers were being published every month detailing research into every aspect of the coronavirus. Of course, I couldn’t read all of them, but I read as many as I could and built a breadth and depth of evidenced-based knowledge about SARS-CoV-2 and COVID-19. I wrote up the protocols and during my tenure as COVID-19 Advisor for this residence, we kept COVID out.

As a family physician seeing COVID-19 in my practice, I came to recognize that so many of my colleagues and patients had no idea how to keep themselves safe from the coronavirus, nor were they aware of its long-term risks. I saw the need to take action and effect change, which ultimately led me to becoming an advocate for Long COVID awareness.

I started the medical education company Kojala Medical, aiming to provide evidenced-based information about medical issues in a form patients could understand and reliably trust. I wanted a credible, trustworthy site to which I could refer my patients, colleagues, friends and family. We started with a focus on COVID-19 and have now expanded to Long COVID, with the site longcovidtheanswers.com.

I first learned about Long COVID in 2020 through publicity raised by the Body Politic COVID-19 support group, then became more alarmed as I read scientific articles about the disease.

Aside from the official death toll of over 7 million from COVID-19, Long COVID has emerged from the pandemic as the single biggest disaster to afflict humanity, yet very few people who are not sick with Long COVID are aware of it, want to know about it, believe in it, or even acknowledge that it’s happening. Sadly, many in the medical profession fall within that group of non and disbelievers.

This is bizarre, especially because of the impact of the disease. One recent review estimates more than 400 million global cases of Long COVID. I am furious that not enough is being done to alleviate this suffering. The injustice of yet another neglected and marginalized chronic illness that disproportionately affects women.

So, rather than sitting around waiting for ‘someone’ or ‘body’ to do something, I decided to act.

For me, medicine is fundamentally about aiding people to get as well as possible from any sickness they have — and even more importantly, preventing people from getting sick in the first place. In both of these regards, we are failing people with Long COVID dismally.

Long COVID is not the flu, it is a multisystem debilitating infection associated chronic condition. Developing Long COVID can be disabling and life-changing. Recovery remains low — and some manifestations like heart disease, dysautonomia, and myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME) may last a lifetime.

This is a terrifying situation to be in when, as a global community, we have chosen to act as though the pandemic is over and repeatedly expose ourselves to SARS-CoV-2, a grade 3 biohazard, with little to no protection.

As I read more and more research papers about Long COVID and looked at the inaction of global governments and my own profession, I feared that we were sleepwalking into a global mass disabling event unnecessarily, since we have many technologies available to prevent this.

Infection-associated chronic conditions do not have an established medical speciality, and are rarely taught in medical school. With the medical profession disengaged, people with Long COVID have been left to find answers for themselves.

My work aims to build on support groups, which have helped establish caring communities for people with Long COVID, but have also paved the way for us as scientists and medics to change the way we conduct research in a more patient-focused way. Nevertheless, they don’t entirely fulfill the need for evidence-based information about the disease in a readable format for nonmedical individuals.

I saw a huge need for a comprehensive website that would be of use to all people with Long COVID, their caregivers, the scientists researching the disease, and the multidisciplinary team of healthcare professionals that would be needed to rehabilitate them. Our organization believes that Long COVID The Answers meets those requirements.

There is also a pressing need to train medical professionals so that they will acknowledge Long COVID and feel confident about diagnosing and managing it. Inspired by an interview with Dr. Ric Arsenaeau, an expert in managing complex chronic diseases, my team and I created a podcast series: so that medical providers can receive continuing professional development/educational credits from watching this series.

The podcast series features a range of experts, including people with Long COVID, doctors, scientists, educators, and medical clinicians. Some of these experts also serve on our advisory board, overlooking and participating in the project.

Our site aims to raise awareness about the dangers of continuously exposing ourselves to a perilous virus with no thought of what it will cost us and our children.

This will mobilize the people of the world to demand that their leaders properly provide safe spaces for us all to prevent us from ever getting infected in the first place.

We need to mandate our governments to access all the mitigating technologies that we have in our roster, not only vaccination. The best way of managing Long COVID is to prevent people getting infected with SARS-CoV-2 in the first place!

We need national and international indoor clean air acts – to protect us from emerging pathogens.

For people with Long COVID, awareness will bring an educated and mobilized medical profession, governmental resources, financial and sociological support, and money for research — to facilitate treatments and, hopefully, a cure.

These are the main reasons why I jump out of bed in the morning with gusto, focus, and determination, and why I’ve poured all my money and my time into educating people about Long COVID.

Dr. Funmi Okunola is a British Family Physician who lives and works in Vancouver, Canada. She is the President and CEO of Kojala Medical, a digital medical education company behind COVID-19 The Answers and Long COVID The Answers.

[drchucktingle]

POUNDED BY DR. GLOBUS

wanted to post today about recent health journey of chuck. ALL STARTED at texas show when i began to feel tightness in throat. i have learned this is called GLOBUS which is a tingler character name if ive ever heard one. got through appearance and had blast but felt terrible

plane journey home was even worse. first thought i strained my voice, then tested for covid (negative) and then figured it was just some kind of virus. had running nose and hoarse and extreme pain behind face and MOST of all this golf ball throat

figured i would get better as viruses tend to go but I DID NOT. after a few weeks went to way of urgent care and they took one look and said you have EXTREME FORM OF ACID REFLUX called laryngopharyngeal reflux (also great tingler character name)

basically this is when your stomach acid comes all the way back up into your throat and erodes it. they immediately put me on medications name of pepcid plus tums plus gaviscon and on and on. was inhaling a dang pharmacy every morning

problem is, NO CHANGE. in fact it started getting worse. in addition to previous symptoms i now couldnt keep any food down. upset stomach all the time. could barely sleep. plus it is scary to have a sickness that gets WORSE over time like this

more doctor talks. i up doses of medication to combat sickness but does not seem to work. one night wake up and think 'dang i need to go to er my stomach is going to just melt or something' (keep in mind because i cant keep food down i am always hungry too).

i go to hospital and they say 'WHOA we need to intervene right now we are doing some tests and putting you on SERIOUS LIFE CHANGING MEDICINE. but here is catch to do the tests we need you to stop all your medication for 48 hours and it will be HECK but you gotta do it bud'

so i stop all medication in preparation for new SICK LIFE and suddenly… i start feeling better. not just a little but after weeks of this awful way i wake up in ONE DAY and feel fully cured. now heres twist: at the same time this was happening I started taking allergy medicine

you may already know where i am going with so i will just hit you with it. my INITIAL SICKNESS was just extreme seasonal allergies that required nothing more than claritin and flonase. however i was misdiagnosed with ACID REFLUX and medication was making my stomach a wasteland

the second i stopped taking acid reflux meds and started on allergy trot i was better almost instantly. today i feel HECKIN GREAT. (SIDE NOTE: after 4 years of chronic pain i am so thankful to not have some OTHER long term health trot to deal with. DANG)

so what is lesson here? first of all please do not think this is in ANY WAY anti-doctor rant or anti-medicine. my doctors were trying their best and made a mistake, they are just people. ALSO while acid reflux medicine made me sick, allergy meds made me better. i am SO fortunate

but what is REALLY fortunate is that chuck is covered under SWEET BARBARAS HEALTH CARE (she gets very good coverage under the frozen lake). most artist buckaroos, even WILDLY successful ones, do not have health care which is huge issue that should be talked on more.

point is EVERYONE should have healthcare. this whole adventure was bad, but it also only cost me 50 dollars. hundreds of thousands of other buckaroos would have to deal with this PLUS it would completely upend their life to cover medical expenses because of a SIMPLE MISTAKE

so that is my story, usually there is more of a lesson to these rants but this one is really just ‘dang what a trip.’ so grateful for my health and my way and the fact i can get simple allergy medicine over the counter. most of all THANKFUL FOR MY BODY it is such a treat to exist

thank you for reading and remember to advocate for yourself and your feelings both BODY and MIND at the doctor. listen to your trot and do not forget that LOVING YOURSELF AND THE SYSTEMS OF YOUR BODY proves love just as much as loving others. trot on buckaroos

[lavandxr]

it's time to be annoying because i saw a post telling people that refusing to mask during a pandemic is eugenics and there's a specific brand of comments that pissed me off:

"i would really like to mask, but i can't, because i'm queer, there's already a target on my back, i would be even more visible :("

i am speaking to other white queer people here, because there's much more nuance otherwise, but: what the fuck

no, you don't desperately want to mask sooo bad but can't because you're gay ;( you want to be told it's okay for you to not do it, you want the person who made the post to justify and comfort you, because you've been called out on your lack of care for your community and it makes you uncomfortable, but you don't want to make a change or any efforts.

i'm going to use your own argument, it's going to sound stupid, and that's because it is: by your own logic, why don't you just try to not look queer then :) oh because that's not how it works? people will know to oppress you either way? how does the mask do more to identify you as a target than the big ass rainbow patch on your sleeve or your alt outfits? why will you "risk it for self expression" with your fashion but putting on a mask is too far and too visible?

you're only asking to be told that it's okay, that you don't have to mask, "it's too risky for you, poor little thing"! i know you're lying to yourself because one, it's not 'too risky', you're just not used to breaking social expectations as much as you'd like to think you are, and two, you're also not masking at concerts. at drag shows. at queer parties. where you know, you wouldn't be targeted for being queer. you're not putting on a mask when someone else in the room is wearing one. you're not isolating and testing after one of your friends you just hung out with was sick. you're only trying to get the people who mask and care to absolve you of the guilt you're feeling. you're hiding behind queerness, like we often do about many other issues.

to end it on a kinder note, yes it is uncomfortable socially to mask sometimes. i chose not to mask at certain work functions because of the whole, social pressure, too hard to stand out by eating in a different room than everyone for several days, etc. but i take on the consequences and test+isolate after. i mask everywhere else to add a layer of protection in case i caught something. so i know the feeling of masking being difficult socially. is that a reason to never do it? to not even try? i mask everywhere else and it's only comfortable in covid conscious queer spaces. everywhere else i feel off and isolated. does that discomfort kill me? spoilers, no it doesnt!

and the more of us that mask, the harder it is to target someone for masking. maybe you just have to be the one to start it in your local community. get a friend to do it with you when you're out. the weight of the stares is lighter to carry with another person. just don't fucking use "i'm oppressed already ;(" as an excuse to let disabled people die because you couldn't handle getting a few stares at the grocery store

*anyone can catch and die from covid btw. but the lack of care is directly ableism. because you don't think "healthy people" (ew) are at risk and you don't care enough about the ones you know are at risk. womp womp you're gross

[whileyoureinschoolidothisallday]

OKAY it has been a day of being sad and panicky. Time to move.

Yesterday, I made a post detailing the cdc announcement that there will no longer be an isolation requirement for covid. If you are one of the thousands of people rightfully raging in my notes, here's some steps to focus on.

We're not gonna give up. I've seen quite a few comments with things like 'what's the point', 'why should I even try anymore' etc etc and what we're not gonna do is give them what they want! It helps the eugenics cause to be apathetic and listless. We've made it this far, we will continue to make it. I know it's hard, but I am at least right here with you. Give yourself whatever time you need to grieve, and then I need you to get up.

If you have stopped masking for any reason, or you haven't upgraded to a respirator style mask, now is the time to change or start. From now on, we will be living in a country where you could assume there are multiple covid positive people in the room with you at all times. Surgical masks will not handle that load, and cloth masks will be even less effective at that point. Obviously, this is an unprecedented situation we're putting these masks in, and I'm not gonna sit here and pretend to be an expert that can tell you with certainty that even respirators will hold up with this amount of viral load for a long period of time, but it's the best and strongest tool we have. I'm considering using my p100 more, so that's always something to consider as well (and they make you look like a cool raver when you wear them!!!). You can buy all sorts of masks here, there's more links in the comments of my original post, and most states have their own mask blocs. To find them, go to Instagram and type "[your state] mask bloc". Here is a google doc of verified advocacy groups and mask blocs all across the country here is a diy fit test kit you can buy for $30 (unfortunately they are sold out right now. shocker.) PLEASE remember to take a layered response in these times. Masks are not the only tool in our arsenal. PLEASE for the love of God keep up with your vaccinations. Make a corsi-rosenthal box or buy a high quality air purifier if you can afford it--at the very least our homes can be safe havens (you can even put a hepa filter on your furnace!!!! And in your car too!!!!!). Use CPC Mouthwash, nasal irrigation, and nasal sprays like this one. Make it a routine: you come home, you shower, you brush your teeth, you rinse your nose, you change your clothes. And, like I said in another one of my posts, DO NOT TAKE OFF THE MASK.

3. If you would like an outlet for your rage and you're into calling your reps, feel free to calmly but firmly let the cdc have it at these numbers!!!!!

[alt text: a tweet by user silly_paulie that reads:

"Disdain for the CDC unites us all. Call today and demand isolation policies be returned to 10 days, and reducing it further to 1 day would be criminally dangerous. Call both:

404-639-7000 (press 8)

800-232-4636"

end text.]

4. If you need more outlets for your rage, I STRONGLY encourage you to get involved with your local union. Moreso than calling the CDC, tbh. I've seen multiple comments telling people just to lie about your symptoms to get more sick time off, but since there's no legal precedent to allow employees sick time for covid, all that's gonna do is get people fired. I truly believe in my lefty heart that the ONLY way we're getting anything close to mitigation is through labor rights. Even the standard for the fucking flu is 3 days, and that's nowhere near as contagious or disabling as covid. I say this as a high risk person with a neuromuscular disability: covid is an intersectional issue, but where we have the most leverage to get what we need is through labor rights.

It is NOT safe for workers to be working while ill with a Level 3 Biohazard (same as TB and the FUCKING PLAGUE. Seriously we have more regulations around fucking lice)

It is NOT safe to willfully EXPOSE your employees to a Level 3 Biohazard

It is NECESSARY for all employees to be allowed up to 10 days to recover fully from Covid-19, in order to avoid possible further injury from or hospitalization

You will NOT die or be disabled for the sake of the wealthy!!!!!

(and while you're at it, ask for better air filtration too!!!! At least 5 air changes an hour, MERV-13 air filters!! Then we won't have to constantly worry about virus bs and policy changes in the first place!!!!)

5. Closing statements. Nothing has changed with covid, this is just policy. Covid still isn't magic, she still has to get in you before she can do damage--mask up, arm your home with clean air, and don't let her. It's always worse toward the end. This is not the time to give up, it's time to dig in your heels and get to work. There are so many good things happening with covid. They are finding encouraging treatments for long covid. Finally, after years of nothing, a new prophylactic for the high risk was submitted for emergency use to the FDA, and it looks like this time it's built to last against new mutations. Covid is here to stay for the rest of our lives, but the real science hasn't given up on taking the worst of its teeth out. We WILL get to the point where the extreme fear of catching covid is nothing but a bad memory for EVERYONE. All I need you to do is commit to the belief that you're gonna survive long enough to be in that moment with the rest of us.

Now stay safe, and give em hell!!!!!

[tizzychardia]

Did anyone else who's chronically ill/disabled/disordered grow up with a parent in the medical field and still get gaslighted to hell and back that everything is fine and that you're just being dramatic? What the fuck is up with that.

My mom is a registered nurse who's second in command to an entire assisted living facility, who also:

- Dismissed my GAD, MDD, & PTSD diagnosis with the excuse of "Everyone gets a little anxious and depressed sometimes. Everyone goes through bad things. You suck it up and push through it."

- Ignored both my binge eating issues and my restrictive diet later on because "growth comes with weight changes" (I dropped 70 pounds in less than a year, I made it clear I was struggling and was dealing with a Body Dysmorphia diagnosis.)

- Forced me to push through days of vomiting and fatigue when my autonomic nervous system first started going haywire in 2020 after covid, because "Education is more important and you're just trying to skip out on school."

- Believed that my tooth pains were from me being lazy and not brushing, when in reality, my adult canines were growing through my gums and messing with my braces, which resulted in dental surgery to correct.

- Refused to believe that I was sick with the flu in 2021 to where it developed into the worst sinus infection of my life and knocked me out of commission completely for two weeks. Every time I've gotten sick after that, it almost turns into an ER visit because I can't breathe.

- Refused to believe that my throat was hurting all the time - it turns out I was a few months away from tonsillitis on account of how massive they were, which resulted in a delayed tonsillectomy.

- Believed that my vision was getting worse because I supposedly wasn't changing my contacts as much as I should, ended up being a lazy eye mixed with my autonomic nervous system disregulating my muscle control & blood flow, causing my vision to rapidly get worse. I am now completely blind in one eye and have shit-poor vision in the other.

- Refused to believe that I had sun poisoning, which turned into a cellulitis infection that was left untreated for six days to the point where I was dangerously close to sepsis and ended up suffering permanent nerve damage in my legs.

- Didn't believe that I had POTS and told me it was just low blood pressure and low blood sugar from not eating well or hydrating enough. I was diagnosed with POTS in February of this year.

- Believed that in April after a massive flare that I was just being dramatic and lazy and not getting up enough, that my symptoms and stomach pains were just "normal POTS things." Resulted in three weeks of untreated GERD which was burning a hole through my stomach lining and esophagus.

Like what the fuck bro. Where the hell did you get your degree.

[midnight-mourning]

*Taps mic* Heard y'all like Moon around here, you're in luck, this one's for you

massive, MASSIVE thank you to @lunarmoves for beta-reading this chapter!!

She put a lot of time and effort into making my BS readable for y'all and it's greatly appreciated <3 <3 <3

Shay also makes really good dca stuff (also sebastian solace but I know very little about the fish tbh) and you should check her out!

Also, happy 200k+!!! We're only 297k from truly becoming the 500k enemies to lovers slowburn of our dreams lmaoooo

But for real I apologize for such a delay with this one. If you'd like to hear my excuses/reasoning they're below the cut, or you can just go read the chapter whatever suits ya ^-^

Tag list (if you would like added please see this post for more info):

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8

@luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @amarynthian-chronicles

@robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva

CW: medical stuff & additionally a bit of unreality mentions

Okay going to try and keep this simple bc I've said parts of it before

So as most of you know, I've been sick for 3 months now

I've now been on two rounds of steroids, and currently on my third round of antibiotics, which are basically keep me fucntional, not improving

besides general discomfort and pain, my memory has been pretty shot at times, I will go through the day and barely remember what I did/what I'm doing/what I need to do

as someone who had brain fog caused by covid a few years ago, this was genuinely a scary experience because ultimately, this has been worse

i've felt out of control of my body, having times where I'm mid thought and then instantly lose it

this is not my normal, I usually pride myself on my memory, so losing it has been incredibly devastating and scary

this was not helped by the fact that the quick care I went to (THREE TIMES for this) basically kind of sort of tried to gaslight me into believing nothing could be done and that it's not an infection

so not only has this entire thing has gotten dragged out so much more, which makes me sad tbh, but I've also felt like I've been going crazy bc it felt like no one was believing me when i said I was sick and not getting any better (including friends, family, coworkers etc, though unintentional on their parts to be fair)

I feel like I've lost three months of my life and coming to terms with that has been, yeah

on top of all that, I'm still in school AND doing grad stuff, and while the school side of things has been okay (thank god), grad's had it's moments, won't get into it but have had multiple issues with my advisor that have been at times just really tough to deal with

Confused spirit got pushed to the back burner, because i quite literally at times could not think, and when it comes to this fic, where there's multiple ongoing plot threads, characterizations, lore, and so on to keep track of, it was just, impossible to me to even consider writing for it

having shorter stuff like promptober, the oneshots and such was great to keep me writing, and also still interact with everyone in the community, plus i had a lot of fun with them so that helped too

this is all to say that I do sincerly apologize for the delay, and at the very least I should've clearly communicated about there being a hiatus, when this all started I thought i'd be down for two weeks max, then as that time kept increasing I just kept putting it off and putting it off because i thought i was going to get better, and then I didn't

I do this for fun and for nothing else, fic writing isn't content (it's engaging with fandom) and i have to remind myself of that sometimes but given that I've been around in some capacity on and off I feel I should've said something in some regard

Having said all that, I'm doing okay now! Still sick, but as long as I'm on meds I'm functional, stuff is getting managable with grad, and hopefully have some fun things coming up irl! Point is, the last three months haven't been the best, but they've been alright, due in part to all the support you all have given me, so thank you for that, can't say it enough :)

Okay, I think that just about covers it, thank you for taking the time to read all of this if you did <3

[lnc2]

it's funny i used this blog as a coping mechanism/disaster diary for so many years and even though i have no interest beyond listening in the next room to the current season of ML i still miss everything this blog did for me during the Worst years of my life. and bc i so loudly cried on here for so long i feel like i should honor that and anyone who saw those breakdowns periodically landing on their dash to share some good things that have been happening.

i'm on like a 100 day med streak, which is silly considering I've been on anti-depressants for nearly a decade and been taking all of the medications for my post-covid issues since 2021. but i've always struggled with taking meds and this is the longest i've ever gone without missing a day.

i moved out of my sick house last year and into a house that has a dog door for toby, a bay window for reading, and colorful walls. i'm still struggling to unpack even though it's been nearly a year but i'm slowly getting there.

i found someone who could help me with this debilitating pain that made it impossible to move or think or do anything but lay in the dark and cry. it's only been two months but that combined with my meds and the fact that i feel like i can finally breathe means i've made more improvement in the last few months than i have in years.

i started trauma therapy to help me deal with the ptsd. i'm not sure if this therapist is one i'll stick with but i'm at least well enough physically to finally tackle this.

i'm starting to read new things again, read them and understand them, which was something that seemed impossible to me even two years ago. i'm dreaming up stories, something i lost when i got sick. i'm still struggling with this fear, a kind of paralysis that is preventing me from trying to write again, but i can feel that itch and i've missed it so fucking much.

idk i feel like i've woken up from a fog. i'm still disabled, i'll always be dealing with some of this bullshit, but i am better than i was and i am better than i was the last time i said i am better than i was.

there are times when i want to scream and rage and wail about everything, when i'm so full of anger and sadness and just overwhelmed by this feeling of loss and not worth it and disappointment. but i am better. i am slowly rebuilding my life and although i'm not #healed enough to accept the things and people and self i lost, i'm trying to get there. and it's the trying i'm holding on to because for so, so long i never believed i'd get the chance to try again.

[xoxoemynn]

just some covid whining

I'm definitely through the worst of it, yay, love that, but omg, idk if it's because it's my first time catching it, or because I was so stressed when I got infected, or just pure fucking bad luck, but this whole experience has been so much worse than I thought it would be. When I tested positive I used a telehealth service and the doctor was basically like "oh, covid is so much milder now, just take some meds to treat your symptoms and you should feel back to normal in 5-10 days."

It's been two weeks and I am SO. FUCKING. TIRED. all the time!!! I am not a nap person, I basically never take naps, and I took multiple over the weekend. I took a mini nap this afternoon. I was ready for bed at 9PM tonight and I'm forcing myself to stay up until 10 (which is partially why I'm making this post!!) just so I don't wind up sabotaging myself and waking up too early.

And I miss being able to breathe easily!! And it gets worse at night/in the morning which is not helping this whole feeling rested thing!! And why hasn't someone invented an Afrin you can take for longer than three days yet?! I'm so desperate I've been trying everything but there is no substitute for just functioning nostrils!!

Also something I was not prepared for were the tummy issues?! That's just adding insult to injury tbh. At first I thought it was because my most severe symptom was the worst sore throat I can remember having as an adult, and it was so bad that I basically didn't eat for a week, and I thought maybe my body was just adjusting to having food in it? But even now, more than a week after I started eating normally, I swear I take a bite of food and just immediately start cramping up.

And ALSO!!!! This last booster was ROUGH. It was the first booster since the very first ones that I actually felt sick afterward. So you're telling me I had a bad reaction to the vaccine AND I still got COVID? Fucking rude!!!

I'm just tired and miserable and I miss being healthy and I had fun things I wanted to do and also I need to job hunt which sucks enough as is, but it sucks even MORE when you are just tired all of the time.

Anyway yes I am resting and taking it easy and not pushing myself too hard but I'm also being a whiny baby about it. So.

[justinspoliticalcorner]

Kurt Eichenwald at The Threats Within:

During a Republican debate in 2015 - back when Donald Trump’s candidacy was widely considered a joke, he spewed some evil nonsense that, if there was less ignorance in the world, should have ended his candidacy. “People that work for me, just the other day, two years old, beautiful child went to have the vaccine and came back and a week later, got a tremendous fever, got very, very sick, now is autistic,” he said. When the debate ended and Trump galumphed off the stage, the person - not people - who worked for him was so angry he got in the candidate’s face, balling him out for what he had said. “I was furious,” the former Trump ally told me years later. “The case he was talking about involved friends of mine. And not only did he invade their privacy, he lied about what happened.” Yes, the ally told me, the child had the vaccine for measles, mumps and rubella (better known as the MMR vaccine.) And yes, the child was autistic. But there was no “tremendous fever.” The child did not become “very, very sick.” The symptoms of the child’s autism showed months before receiving the vaccine. The family had the diagnosis of probable autism long before the vaccine. And after the child received the MMR, the already-present symptoms didn’t accelerate. Nothing changed in the child a week later, a month later, six months later. Eventually, the diagnosis changed from probable autism to autism - long, long after the MMR. Trump never apologized for intruding on this family’s pain, lying about it, or deceiving the scientifically illiterate. Instead, he has continued to ape the blatherings about childhood vaccination from.

[...] But one thing was keeping the coals of a future career burning: The praise of people like Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the anti-vaxxer whom Trump has nominated as Health and Human Services Secretary. At a 2015 event where Kennedy appeared with Wakefield, our possibly future head of national medical issues proclaimed to the assembled crowd, “In any just society, we would be building statues to Andy Wakefield.” Trump also jumped on the bandwagon. After his lie during the Republican debate and the resulting condemnation of his repeating the then-disproven link between vaccines and autism, he doubled down as is his wont. In 2016, he invited Wakefield - literally, this universally condemned fraud! - to a meeting to discuss vaccination policy. Wakefield emerged from the meeting saying not only that Trump believed vaccines cause autism, but that he promised to do something about it if elected president. In his first term, as we all know, Trump had a number of intelligent people around him to block his worst impulses. His head of HHS was a former deputy secretary of the agency (and former drug company executive, but what can you expect?) It’s also difficult to believe that he is an anti-vaxxer, given his push to develop a COVID vaccine and his own use of it. But remember: This is not about vaccines for adults like those for COVID. This is about childhood vaccination (Which Trump opposed for COVID.) This time around, with Kennedy, Trump has gone full-blown anti-vaxxer which, if Wakefield is to be believed, is a reflection of the president-elect’s views. Kennedy is just the vehicle reflecting Trump’s own uneducated, uninformed and ignorant beliefs about childhood vaccination. He tipped his hand during a recent interview with Time magazine. It started when he said, “The autism rate is at a level that nobody ever believed possible. If you look at things that are happening, there's something causing it.” Why? Well, we should be looking at vaccines, Trump said. And he’d make sure that his people, led by Kennedy - an uninformed, intellectually lazy anti vaxxer - would form a team to look into it. He said his administration would conduct “very serious testing,” on the link between vaccines and autism, after which “we will know for sure what's good and what's not good.”

The normalization of anti-vaccine politics, fueled by Donald Trump (even though he helped get the beginnings of the COVID vaccines off the ground) and RFK Jr., is a disgraceful sight to see. One of the lies anti-vaxxer extremists traffic in is the debunked myth that vaccines “cause” autism.

[olderthannetfic]

I really hate how easily it is to notice that, despite all the talks about tolerance and acceptance, the moment you start talking disability and the actual diversity of issues within, people get fucking uncomfortable

Especially abled-bodied, and/or neurotypical people who seem to have a might need to reframe disabilities. Not disabled, but DIFFERENTLY abled. Not disabled, but SPECIALLY abled. Or whatever, or reframing disabilities, especially chronic ones, as a superpower or some shit.

Even disabled people do that shit, it's still fucking annoying, but that's an issue between you and your life. Just don't try and push it as a "better term."

But what adds another layer is, that despite trying to pretend that people accept disabilities, they'll still become almost furious when something or a certain "life experience" is presented to be disabling. Not even "as a disability, period." but just disabling in your life.

It also almost always feels like disabilities are an afterthought in any discussions about society and issues faced. So many things don't get addressed or glossed over, UNLESS they also bother enough abled people. -Sever anxiety or other NDs that make it hard to talk to people? Nah, we won't give you the option for no-face-to-face ordering... oh the ablebodied people getting sick? Wait a minute, now it's much more accessible. : ) -Damn these stairs are hard to use because you use a wheelchair/bad legs/other shit? Ok, but can we wait until the people we actually care for need help? You can just crawl right? -You're a deaf/HOH person? And you wanna set up an appointment anywhere? Yeah... so... we only take calls. Yes we understand that we're a clinic specialising in HOH/Deafness, but you can't expect us to do HOH/Deafness-accessible appointment set-ups, like sms or email.

And then, when you dare talk about it. OTHER issues are more important. The WHATTABOUTISM in disabled issues is fucking staggering and painful. -Who cares that disabled people can't save money in fear of losing their life, what about POC people? What about queer people? -Who cares that disabled people are the first to be sacrificed when it comes down to it, covid anyone? Remember how disabled people were the first to be put on the "take them off the support" list? - Dating, relationships, marriage as a disabled person has red tape out the wazooo. But how dare you mention it, queer people also have problems.

It's not even like we get to say "Yeah both are important, let's work together." It's more like people are trying to push disabled issues out of the way, and occasionally add it on as an accessory in favor of the more "aesthetic" issues.

--

[drdemonprince]

Hi Devon,

this might not be a question you can answer, or maybe it is! idk. this is about covid & alike

for context on myself, i’m a white gendrfucky trans guy who’s also autistic & an immigrant (so some cultural context is probably lacking)

as we know, we’re in a 2nd highest surge & the pandemic never stopped and it increasingly dangerous and disabling to so many

i wear my kn95 everywhere i go now, and while i tried last semester, it was a lot easier to abandon masking because of

1. others’ around me negligence

2. some classrooms being IMPOSSIBLY hot and close to unbearable with a respirator on

3. attending crowded events where people needed to hear me

i’ve reevaluated and am rebuilding my practices now, but what i’m finding really difficult is to get people i have in my life to wear a mask again

i feel so lost. i share the informational posts, i talk to my people, i offer masks- what else is there to do?? i know the exhaustion i feel is absolutely incomparable to what disabled and immunocompromised people feel, especially when they’ve done the work for years!

i just don’t understand how i’m supposed to keep moving through life. i mean ofc i’ll keep doing what i’m already doing but it’s so incredibly isolating to be the only person masked in a meeting of 20,30,50 people.

i don’t know how to make people care. i don’t know how to have conversations with my friends in a way that will let our relationship evolve with this new understanding of care. i don’t know how to not polarize people into defensiveness when i talk about the powers wreaking atrocities in falasteen being the same ones shortening an isolation period to 1 day.

i don’t know how to be eloquent enough to be listened to and firm enough where people take what i say seriously. i don’t know how to not start screaming WEAR A MASK anytime it’s a crowded (or even not crowded) meeting indoors with no air filtration.

idk how people don’t realize the “cold” they’ve had for 3 weeks is either covid or direct aftermath of it. idk how they stand for seemingly the right things and then come to work sick & unmasked.

i don’t know how to engage with most people in a meaningful way & find connections because the delusion, the “it won’t happen to me”, the “i don’t care if i catch it and die”, the “this is just the way it is” seems to be a wall made of unbreakable cement and i don’t know what will melt it.

i feel insane for having compassion towards the world and seeing how it can be better. i feel insane for being angry people don’t mask & downplay this issue. i feel insane for even trying to talk sense into people.

i’ve recently been called a lying phony by an account that talks about masking bc a lot of my recent pictures show my face without a mask. i archived the posts since, apologized and reflected. but a lot of pictures i take are in my own room so i am unmasked. idk

i feel like the gap between me and most people i know is growing wider by the minute and with every reading i do about interdependent revolutionary practices, etc.

i know that when one understands something, it is their responsibility to make an impact on their bubble of the world and transform it with their knowledge. but i doubt i’m the only one doing the reading and knowing what’s going on, i just seem to be the only one masking.

i don’t know. i’m sorry it’s such a long ask & i’m sure you have your own stuff you’re dealing with. i just don’t know who else to ask that might understand. i’m sure there are people around me who might but so many are in survival mode and i currently don’t know anyone with the capacity to hold space for this.

i guess it’s bold to assume you do.

anyway, i hope your day goes alright today<3

You are placing wayyy too much responsibility upon yourself as one compassionate and informed individual here, and expecting far too much perfection of yourself in ways that do not help you and do not help the cause. You've done a lot to unpack the terrible individualism that has led to anti-mask sentiment being so rampant, but you are in a way still applying that logic to yourself and your situation by imagining that if you, one humble person with limited power were able to be adequately persuasive, you'd somehow change the actions of thousands. That is not how behavior change works.

Persuasion almost never happens logically or instantly, almost never through one person's remarks. Behavior is shaped by a vast array of economic, sociological, emotional, and ideological factors.

It's also not helpful in my opinion to worry about the opinion of someone who would shame you for not wearing a mask at home alone in your bedroom, either. Obsessing over the optics of our actions and wanting all people to morally approve of us at all times is yet another consequence of individualism and Puritanism. as you well know as someone who masks in a crowd of maskless people, sometimes we gotta do what we know is right and disregard others' opinions.

What you can do, in my opinion, is this: keep masking. Your behavior reminds people of the need for masks and models socially responsible behavior. Bring spare masks with you. Offer them to your family and friends and the people standing near you in public. If they refuse, and you have a good relationship with the person where they have shown they respect you and listen to you, then you can tell them why masking around you is important to you. You cannot change the opinion of someone who has never shown you any respect so don't expect that to ever work.

Even if you do have a good relationship with someone, persuasion is a long, hard process. Do not expect yourself to change their mind. If you can get some people to mask at least around you, that is a victory. Perfection is an unrealistic goal here to expect of yourself, and for public health in general. Any improvement you can inspire is a victory. Even if it's just making one or two friends mask more often when they are with you. That still lessens risk. That still sends a visible signal to everyone around you. You have no idea of the impact you truly have on other people in the long term. It is both more modest and far larger and longer-reaching than you as an individual will ever know.

Please be easy on yourself. You are just a person. An average person with very limited power. So is everyone else for the most part. When you stop burdening yourself with the unrealistic responsibility of changing thousands of people's behavior, you will feel less resentful toward others as well. When we resent other people it always means we are doing too much.

And when you feel less overwhelmed and overburdened, you will be more effective in the conversations you do have with people about COVID too. People do not respond well to (what they perceive to be) guilt or intensity or someone presuming to know better than them. What people do respond to well is to be asked genuine questions, listened to, validated in their feelings, given help where they are facing barriers to action, and being treated with compassionate gentleness.

But to do that you have to work on believing that people who are flawed in their response to COVID have reasons for doing so that make sense to them, and that they aren't all foolish and lacking in compassion. As my friend @kim-from-kansas says, people do not do things that do not make sense. If a person's actions do not make sense to you, it is because you are missing a piece of their context. The sad fact is people have many reasons to think that masking doesn't work or is hopeless. People have been very heavily propagandized and trauma also makes many people value life less.

Convincing people to take COVID more seriously is a tall, tall order, but if you wish to do so, you will need to be more than correct. You will have to put real work into not making people feel judged, and you will have to make peace with not always (or even usually) succeeding. It sucks but that's how it is. Best of luck!!