#but self control is more important than ranting

[bastardwhoisnamedrat]

hippie is punk.... by wavves is... is *coughs* caldre.... *hack*

[shepscapades]

looking through your docsuma tag.....love them. wish they had one more combined braincell so they could realize their feelings

HERE'S THE THING THOUGH OKAY the problem is actually that they're both too smart about their feelings. you've got me down a horrible rabbit hole okay let me do my best to explain without being a freak(reading this back over, i failed <3).

Xisuma takes longer to realize, first of all. He's got so much to deal with coming out of s8 and through the beginning of s9 that quite frankly he's really just grateful to have another friend he can count on and trust, and he's so consumed by getting the androids back in working order on top of his actual season 9 plans (on top of Cleo shoving self care down his throat and demanding that he make a better habit of taking breaks and taking care of himself, which takes a LONG time to adjust to, if it can be argued that he ever does) that he doesn't really realize he's developed feelings for Doc until his heart beats him over the head with it randomly one day. Probably sometime in S10. Even then, because of said busy-ness, I think Xisuma has a very hard time getting over the meta-ness of a creator developing feelings for his creation and the selfishness of that reality amidst all of his other responsibilities, and he is likely too scared/overwhelmed to entertain the thought of the feelings themselves, much less the likelihood of reciprocation or the fantasy of a relationship.

Doc, on the other hand, realizes he is developing feelings for Xisuma kind of steadily throughout the course of s9, since that's when they start spending so much more time together in the lab working on androids and improving android tech. As a general statement, Doc is very aware of himself, all of the time. His awareness of the self is very important to his sense of normalcy and control, so any time he experiences a new emotion, he notes it, logs it.

So, while he's very aware of the feelings he's developing as they happen, he doesn't quite put a name to it/realize what it actually is until he talks to Tango and Etho, funnily enough--It's definitely one of those moments where Tango or Etho or whomever are explaining their struggles with the physical manifestations of their... idk, lovesickness-- ie, thirium pump rate irregularities, temperature fluctuations, influxes of feelings they've described as a combination of longing, affection, want, happiness, yearning... and Doc, as the unbiased third party to put 2 and 2 together, explains to them that those are obvious signs of romantic attraction, only very belatedly realizing several hours later that those are the exact symptoms he hasn't quite been able to put a name to. Naturally he's exceptional about being quiet about this realization until he slips up during a maintenance check-in with Tango sometime after, who is not doing well in s9, and Tango (mid romance-ranting) catches the passing of a wistful expression on Doc's face and calls him out for "totally thinking about someone right now" (Teasing aside, tango promises to keep Doc's secret).

So, despite knowing well his feelings before X ever develops his own, Doc is actually very, very careful about them-- He knows more than anyone else how busy Xisuma is. He knows how stressed X is. He also knows Xisuma seems to be more knowledgeable when it comes to emotions and feelings, and despite the clear signs that Xisuma shows interest(?) in him as well, Doc can only assume there is a good reason nothing romantic has happened between them-- he trusts Xisuma more than anything, and he--firmly-- will not breach this trust by acting on something Xisuma does not seem to be ready for (or does not seem to want yet(yet?)). Therefore, Doc is patient, and even though as Season 10 develops and Doc becomes aware of the likelihood that Xisuma could return the feelings, he trusts Xisuma's emotional intuition more than anything. He, painfully, recognizes Xisuma's discomfort (or hesitation), concludes that there must be a missing variable in this equation he cannot grasp, and decides to let Xisuma lead because of it. He will not push farther than he feels Xisuma has.

It's definitely one of those "fell first" "fell harder" type situations I think. I'm normal about them. can you tell

[twistedapple]

On cherry and musk

EDIT 28/10/2023: Part two of the Perfume Rant is bout, about Astarion this time! + added a correction regarding the sulfur part.

EDIT 3/11/2023: Part three of the Perfume Rant is up, this time I talk about my OC, Nuria.

EDIT 28/11/2023: I kept forgetting to make that edit but I added a comment regarding the cherry and how its sickly sweet tone is usually used in perfumes to express death.

Hello hello.

Because Raphael's perfume, according to Yurgir, is exactly the type of scent that makes me lose my mind while being quite uncommon for men perfumes IRL, I've decided to go on a bit of perfume rant because I really like perfume in general (which is funny considering my autistic ass easily goes in sensory overload, especially atm with my state of autistic burnout).

To introduce the topic, I'd like to present some generalities about perfumes, so you know what I mean once I start losing my mind about why Raphael's scent would drive me crazy IRL (someone at Larian knows their shit about perfumes).

Perfumes are, most commonly, made with an alcoholic base (the Middle East also has an oil base), because the ingredients used to create the scents are more soluble in alcohol than water. There are distinctions in the types of perfumes once can find, based on the concentration of scented molecules:

Perfumed mists: less than 3% of scented molecules, low duration over time;

Colognes: the weakest concentration in perfumes as we usually know and use them. It has a long history as well, and was first worn by men;

Eau de toilette (here, understand that it's a perfume associated with cleanliness): count between 5% and 15% of scented molecules;

Eau de parfum (lit. "perfume water"): count between 10% and 20% of scented molecules. These perfumes are more expensive because they're more concentrated, however nowadays they're still commonly found in stores;

Extrait de parfum (perfume extract - pure perfume): count between 15% and 40% of scented molecules, the high concentration means it has to be used with care.

Now, why do we wear perfume? Everything around us as a scent: the soap used to wash our clothes, the food we cook, the deodorant we use... Our own skin has a natural scent. Wearing perfume is a way to control our scent and define our olfactive identity as part of our self-expression and sense of fashion. With hormones at play, not every perfume works with anybody - for example, Hesperide-type perfumes don't suit me, but work wonderfully well on my mother -, so the way a perfume sits and ages on one's skin is just as important as one's personal preferences in term of scents. Interestingly, for some decades now the most common perfumes tend to have a "clean" scent, which matches with Western standards of cleanliness. However, the goal of perfumes being self-expression, they also tend to tell a story based on the way the notes develop and work together.

We have various categories for perfumes, which involve the styles based on the families of notes, the time of the day and the seasons.

The main families of perfume are Floral (self-explanatory), Chypre (woody scents), Oriental (spiced scents), Hesperide (citrus scents) and Aquatic (water-like scents). These families can be mixed in the scale of notes to obtain a more complex scent. For example, Floral scents tend to work well with Oriental and Hesperide tones, Hesperide tones work well with Aquatic ones, Oriental and Chypre scents can be associated to create heady perfumes...

The times of the day are either Daytime or Nighttime. Daytime perfumes tend to be lighter, while Nighttime perfumes, often worn during events or at clubs, will be stronger since they compete with other stronger scents.

Seasons also influence perfumes, some molecules won't last as well in Summer as they do in Winter for example. On the other hand, some molecules will have a harder time expressing themselves in the cold of Winter, so heavier scents may be needed.

A perfume is organised in three layers to unfold its story:

Top notes: the very first notes, which usually don't last much but open the impression of the perfume;

Heart notes: the core scents of the perfume, around which the story is built;

Base notes: the lasting notes of the perfume, which close the story.

There is also two ways a perfume works:

Sillage: the trail left by a perfume;

Projection: the perimeter in whih a perfume can be felt.

Feminine and Masculine perfumes tend to be quite different as well. Feminine perfumes tend to lean on floral and fruity scents, while masculine perfumes will be more in the Aquatic and Oriental family with leather and musk tones. This is where I start my rant on Raphael's likely amazing perfume.

Fruits are rarely used for masculine perfume, to the point I'd say it's a grossly ignored scent family for men. Some years ago, I crossed path with a man in the metro who had the most amazing perfume, with raspberry in distinctive top note, unfolding into a warm woody scent. This is what got me into perfumes, because I had to find out what perfume it was - the most likely candidate is One Million by Paco Rabane, but even then I am not sure. This is a very specific and striking scent, precisely because it's so uncommon for a man to wear. With that in mind, let's remember what Yurgir said Raphael's scent is: cherries, musk and sulfur. I suspect we can take these notes in the proper top-heart-base notes, because they'd make sense that way both in term of perfume composition and as a mean to tell Raphael's personal story.

Cherries make for a sweet, enticing top note, perfect to express Raphael's ability to charm his victims clients. Cherries' sweetness is also often associated with the sickly sweet smell of death, and is used for that purpose in perfumes following that theme. Considering what signing a devil's contract entails, it's quite fitting.

Musk is a common note both for masculine and feminine perfumes, but it tends to be used as a base note. This time, however, it'd make sense to have it in heart note for at least two fantastic reasons: to draw people further in with a warm and sensual note, and because the base note serves to close the story better than musk.

Sulfur as base note would be extremely smart. One might ask me "but Crow, doesn't sulfur smell like rotten egg?" And that would be a pertinent question. It wouldn't be the first time a strange ingredient is used to complete a perfume by providing unexpected results. Here, we're not just talking sulfur, we're talking brimstone. Mixed with the other notes, however, it creates a smoky scent that serves to hint at Raphael's nature as a devil (gotta smell like Avernus!), and also provides a strong support for the sensual musk by adding depth to it.

We also have Raphael's boudoir invitation described as having his perfume: palmarosa and pepper. These scents tend to be heart notes, to compose a refreshing spicy floral: palmarosa is a floral scent with a citrus tone, pepper is what it says on the tin and is considered an aphrodisiac scent. Fitting the boudoir invite, considering the presence of a certain incubus... This addition in the heart notes would counter-balance the musk nicely and contribute to a layer of complexity with a surprisingly feminine tone: floral oriental notes are rarely used in masculine perfumes. However, here I think it serves to express refinement through complexity - something people often associate with Raphael, who presents as a noble (and is, by the Nine Hells' standards, a noble in his quality as Mephistopheles' son), as well as frames himself as an agreeable host who can offer many pleasures to his guests and clients (as long as they have something to provide in exchange - cue the sulfur as base note to remind of Raphael's diabolical nature).

Yurgir describes Tav as bearing Raphael's scent. Raphael was near Tav, which makes me think his perfume has projection rather than sillage. It'd make sense for Raphael to have a perfume more oriented towards projection than sillage: he'd want to let people know he's here, and it's a subtle way to dominate the scene as well in a magnetic manner - and we know Raphael has an imperious tendency, even in his handwriting, so having it expressed in his perfume as well would make sense.

To conclude, Raphael has fantastic taste in perfume in my totally biased opinion (this sort of perfume is a shortcut to make me swoon IRL), and what has been confirmed as being his scent/perfume serves to subtly support his characterisation and tell a story both to us players and the people he deals with in the story.

[gl1tchrix]

Time to rant about falsettos racquetball.

In falsettos we only get to see two instances of Marvin and Whizzer playing racquetball. The second one serves as a segue into Whizzer’s sickness, but the first one, or rather the fact that they play racquetball in general is what I want to focus on.

They don’t outright say it but to me, and likely to many others, the two men playing this game together is a testament to Marvin’s growth as a character. In every way, racquetball serves as a direct contrast to the chess game towards the end of act one.

The chess game is Marvin’s desire for control. He wants to win, he wants others to follow him, he always wants to be right and be in charge. He wants to be smart, he wants to be the best. He’s arrogant and self centered.

Racquetball is the opposite. Even in the physical sense. In chess, one must sit down and think precisely about every move. Racquetball is fast paced and you’re constantly moving. But what it shows is that Marvin now knows that his love for Whizzer is more important than all of those selfish things before. He’s ok with being bad at something. He is jokingly disappointed when he loses or makes a mistake, but he’s also happy to do something with Whizzer that Whizzer will always win.

The racquetball games are proof that Marvin has a better understanding of love. It’s no longer self serving but instead a true partnership. He doesn’t expect to be treated like a king, but finally as an equal. It makes both of them so much happier and their relationship so much more fulfilling.

Not to mention, that’s what makes the second round of racquetball games so sad. Whizzer collapses while doing the thing that was so fun for him and Marvin. Their last happy and innocent memory is the game that helped them overcome their strongest relationship struggles.

Anyways this is too long I’m done now I’m gonna go cry about them.

[blushstarot]

PICK A CARD READING: July 2024

What's in store for you on this July? A general, love & relationships, and money and career reading.

Disclaimer: I'll be pulling only one card for each section, and that card will represent the collective vibes of that pile on this month. Since there will be only one card I won't be able to give a really detailed explication on the topics, I'll only give a superficial one, no specifics, no ways to fix problems. Take this reading as a warning/reflection on what's to come this month so you can be prepared.

Pick whichever picture you feel more attracted to and skip to that pile.

rant, poll and links at the end as always. Images by -曼多林先生-.

Pile 1

general: the magician

The universe is aligning to bring positive energies into your life, if you were thinking in doing something new this is time to put your time and energy into it! But even with the universe helping you, remember that you actually have to do your part to achieve your goals, so trust in your abilities and don't try to leave all the work to the universe.

love & relationships: nine of pentacles (reversed)

There would be a lack of stability and/or security, and specially issues regarding money.

If you are in a relationship, you or your partner are acting a little spoiled, in the sense of wanting all the rewards without actually putting in the work, this month is a great opportunity to reflect and communicate with your partner on this.

If you are single, reflect on why you want to start a relationship, it could be in general, or with someone specific in mind. The answer might seem obvious, but there's a chance you or the one interested in you is seeking the relationship to gain wealth or status rather than actually being romantically interested.

money & career: ace of wands (reversed)

There would be a lack of energy and enthusiasm on your work, maybe you are getting tired of the routine or you aren't feeling really creative (if that is relevant for your work). 

There might be some money related issues, like losing money on investments or some unexpected bills.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 2

general: five of swords

There might be self-sabotaging and communication problems, this could lead you to stress and serious conflicts. With the arrival of this issues (or continuation of old ones), there might also come an opportunity for you to stand up for yourself and fight back and emerge victorious from your problems.

love & relationships: five of wands

If you are in a relationship, there might be situations that provoke frustration, irritation or competitiveness, which may lead to conflicts and fighting. Now, some people like this kind of relationship so this is not necessary a bad thing, if you prefer a more calm relationship, you might want to take a step back, think about the situation, and once both of you are calm enough, communicate and try to compromise.

If you are single, you love life this month will get a little chaotic since there will be a lot of people wanting to get your attention, this might be good or bad depending on your preferences, but just try to not let things get out of control since it could easily turn south.

money & career: justice

Separate 👏 your 👏 work 👏 from 👏 your 👏 personal 👏 life 👏 .

You have a schedule for a reason, don't take the work home, enjoy your free time; and if you work from home, designate some "me time". I know sometimes is difficult fully separate yourself from work, specially if it's something important, but you have to remember that it's not healthy for you is all you do is work and you don't relax from time to time. Start some new hobbies, spend time with your love ones, anything is okay as long as you are relaxing and having fun.

In terms of money, everything will be fine, your hard work will be rewarded. This is more of a reminder that as long as you act with integrity in your business and other money related affairs, you will be compensated.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Pile 3

general: the high priestess

Follow you intuition, trust more in your instincts. If you feel you are getting signs of something, trust it and do research on the topic, there's a reason the universe is sending it to you.

love & relationships: knight of pentacles (reversed)

If you are in a relationship, this month it might become a little unstable, it could be for lack of effort in the relationship, lack of commitment, or just the routine is starting to make the relationship a little boring, dull even.

If you are single, you might not be ready for commitment in a relationship just yet. This is not necessarily bad, just let the other person know beforehand that you aren't looking for anything serious, so no-one gets hurt in the process. There could also be the case that someone is seeking a relationship with you, but they are the ones who aren't ready for commitment.

money & career: death (reversed)

Maybe you've been thinking of changing careers, or get a new direction on the one you currently have, and you weren't really sure to do it, for any reason. This month take time to figure out what changes you want/need to make for it to happen.

You might go through a rough patch this month, or maybe you already are going through it. Take time this month to plan ahead and rethink how you are going to manage your finances to lessen the impact. Don't freak out though, this will be temporary, maybe you just have to cut some unnecessary expenses for a short while, just be sure to manage your money wisely.

**As in all the PACs, just take what resonates and leave what doesn't, this is for entertainment only, so have fun with it!

Heey, I'm not really sure if I'll do this type of readings monthly, it mostly depends on if you guys like it or not, and ofc if I'm having fun doing them! Personally, I had so much fun doing this kind of reading, hopefully the next ones will be posted before the month actually starts. So huh, yeah, this month the love readings aren't looking to good, I'm not versed in astrology, but maybe something is going on? I don't really know.

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think and if you want more readings like this.

You can find more of my PACs on my master list, and if you have any suggestions on future PACs you want to see me do, you can send me an ask. Curious about me? want to know how my blog works? want to look at more tags I use? you can see all that on my pinned post.

Bye byeee, have a great month ✨

[mazeinthemiroh]

I have a fluffy thought about skz Hyung line, and was wondering what signs they would show when they’re in love with someone 🥺❤️ like it makes me bust an uwu thinking about them being so sweet with someone

signs stray kids would show when they're in love (hyung line)

genre: fluff + romance

word count: 0.8k

warnings: they're all simps (but yall knew that anyway 😚)

please like and reblog if you enjoy <3

bangchan

he catches himself falling for you when he's smiling like an idiot every time he receives a text from you. his dimples are on full display as he reads the simple, sweet message you sent him

he's a simp and he can't help it

with you, in person, he feels like h can relax with you and let his inner self come to life

constant conversations and speculations and rants about his favourite shows and what happened at work that day and what's the best takeaway food, etc etc... chan is very good at talking, we know this. but he feels like talking with you he is able to express himself fully and be his dorky self <3

will initiate physical contact (shyly, at first.) he's very physically affectionate and even if you're not dating, if you guys are really close friends and he has these intense feelings for you, he can't help but ask you if you're comfortable with him being physically affectionate

and when you say yes, he's bashful about it. will initiate little touches here and there, which seems to brew up an electric kind of tension. and god, does he love it

overall, the main sign that he is in love is the way he looks at you - such genuine admiration in those adoring eyes

minho

he tries to control these light, happy feelings that keep bubbling up when he sees you

but he can't. not for too long

a bashful smile, and a playful side-eye. perfect glares and jeering remarks and oh, how he loves your interactions.

in fact, he lives for them; gushing over them like he's never had a crush before. because he knew deep down this was something much more.

he's a tease - his daring nature and mocking humour mixed with his cute and awkward execution seemed to add to his charm, if that was even humanly possible. he just had it all.

but his wicked games and playful habits don't fool anyone. the tips of his ears turning red and the persistent sparkle in his eyes give him away. he's not fooling anyone.

and despite his somewhat interesting mannerisms, you tend to soften his usual harshness. he would be more sensitive to your thoughts and wants to learn about your opinions on things

he feels like he can talk forever with you because the conversation between you both flows so naturally, which is a realisation that makes his heart skips a beat

he just feels like you get him

changbin

he's subtler than the rest

and for him, 'love' is such a deep emotion. he does fall for someone easily - this someone needs to have something truly special about them in order for binnie to fall for them. after all, he knows and likes a lot of people, being the social butterfly he is

so when he is in love, he's likely to want to be around you a whole lot more

spending most if not all his time with you

inviting you out to meet his friends

he wants you to be involved in his social life, even if you are on the quieter side. he just views you as such an important person in his life that it only makes sense for him to introduce you to those he speaks so highly of

there a times were he catches himself thinking more romantically than he ever thought he would - he's captivated by your laugh, the way it lingers and hangs and ingrains itself in his heart

and soon he is not so subtle with his love for you, finding it so incredibly easy to compliment you on everything you do. he praises you even when you don't deem yourself worthy of praise

he's a very happy man indeed

hyunjin

he has tunnel vision

it seems you are the only one who matters to him. yes, you're the only one he sees in a crowded room. yes, you're the only one whose opinions matter to him

he wants to be close with you and only you - and he actively seeks out that closeness

you fascinate him immensely. your thoughts, feelings, speculations on life, opinions on death - the whole package, that's what he wants to know. so if he asks you questions upon questions, it's because he is interested, and could listen to you talk for ages

enthralled by your beauty, your life, your approach to people around you

maybe he romanticises things too much with his pages of poetry about the pattern in your eyes

or the watercolours he paints, attempting to capture the curves in your face, the tone of your skin he's addicted to, the body he can't help but trail his eyes over when he sees you

but he's frustrated as he writes and paints because he knows it won't be the same. it doesn't capture the perfectness that is you.

skz taglist: @hearts4sungie, @seokshineswiftie, @alyszaen, @jtrstp, @a-wandering-stay, @hyungenie5, @anyamaris, @acciocriativity, @chammak-challokys

[nixthelapin]

A Jekyll&Hyde type akuma whose power is to bring out a hidden or repressed part of your personality (but like, making two of you instead of switching in one body), and when Chat gets hit suddenly there’s both “normal” Chat (I’ll get to that in a sec) and Cat Walker/Patte de Velours at the same time.

(Cue Ladybug freaking out upon learning they’re the same person)

“Normal” Chat looks the same, but is just a bit more intense (since this is Adrien’s way of “letting loose” to not be how he is as a civilian, he’s not too different, but because of the split he does lose some usual traits). I.e. *heavily* flirting with LB, going at it with the puns, more agressive and impulsive with the akuma, doesnt like following orders (especially with the remaining feelings of anger towards the partnership being put further into question as LB prefers CW), heart on his sleeve

Cat Walker is also not super different to the episode he was in, but is also more intense thanks to the akuma: all business- no nonsense, doesn’t laugh at jokes (even in a “I’ll laugh if you want” way, like in Kuroneko), cordial to LB, follows LB’s orders to a T (to the point of not making his own decisions in battle), calm and collected (almost emotionless, even with that plastered smile)

CN starts to hate CW as the fight goes on, because LB seems to prefer him (and she’s understandably getting annoyed with CN’s impulsivity). CN gets territorial, saying that he’s LB’s partner. CW: “then why did she replace you with me?” (Man, look at all the self hatred in Adrien’s psyche!)

So CN runs off and leaves them alone to fight the akuma. This ticks LB off even more, but she has an akuma to deal with- and she has CW- so she lets him go.

As the fight goes on, some of the same issues from Kuroneko occur, so she also gets frustrated with CW too.

Since he’s acting more extreme than normal (more like someone awaiting orders than a partner due to the Jekyll&Hyde thing), it causes more problems (like him waiting for her decisions leaving openings where he could’ve done something proactive)

She actually blows up at him, asking why he didn’t do anything (“I was waiting for you to tell me the plan!”), and she says he should be able to think on his own, he doesn’t need her to tell him everything, but- “I thought I was just being what you wanted.”

(He’s shocked and genuinely hurt- though it’s still pretty quiet emotion, subdued and apologetic)

And that’s when it clicks for her what becoming CW was back in Kuroneko. He was molding himself for her. And this version of CW is even more of that. She realizes just how much CN suppresses, not just for her, but for everyone- why else would this be a major aspect of his personality?

(Also, Patte de Velours? Velvet Paw? That’s basically saying he’s been declawed. Yikes.)

She makes CN get his butt back to the fight (or she finds him- he may have been doing something while away like talking with someone, maybe Alya or Nino, or Luka). CN and CW argue more, with insults. Then she goes on a whole rant/lecture to them about how important they both are, both to her and to each other, how they are one person, and their traits are both important, but each extreme is not great. Ex: instinct/impulse and service/obedience (the key is self control, so that your emotions aren’t controlling you, but neither is another person). He is allowed to be both! Neither personality is bad, and hating one is just hating himself- he can’t just reject a fundamental part of himself.

She makes them agree to work together to defeat the akuma. It’s awkward at first, but they get a rhythm by seeing where each one is needed in the plan (LB does still do that, but how they follow is more fluid now). Two cataclysms now! Yay! (Maybe they used their powers already and have to de transform, and they see themselves as Adrien- the same one, not different, and it gets through their skulls. Idk I’m spitballing).

They have a quick talk between the two about accepting each other, it won’t be easy, I’m nervous, we’ll be okay (“yeah, I think we will :)”), etc.

Ends with them combining back with the ladybug cure. Surprise! His outfit is combined too! (Honestly, I just want the ponytail with the fluffy hair)

LB and CN have a talk after recharging about everything. CN apologizes for lying about CW and explains why and how he did it. LB didn’t realize how much he hid. She never meant for him to change or hate parts of himself. He thought she didn’t like the CN parts of him, but LB promises that isn’t true. She admits she did get… annoyed, but never hate! She loves both sides of him. Besides, CW didn’t work out that first time, remember? (Though she very much leaves out her intense crushing being the deciding factor there)

CN admits he feels more, well, not whole, exactly, he’s actually still pretty uncertain about what all this means for “who he is,” but… he can at least say he feels less like he has to perform all the time. He loves being Chat Noir, but he is exaggerating a bit when he transforms, in part to be not like his civilian life. He tells her he’s not like that as a civilian, but he’s also not like Cat Walker. But he’s not really sure who “he” is yet. (What I’m getting at is Oblivio!Adrien- dorky, but not over the top, in love, trusts his lady to make the plan, but is still proactive, etc.)

LB says that’s okay, he doesn’t have to figure it out right away. But she’ll be there to help him figure it out.

END

[alloftheimaginesblog]

damaged goods {e.m}

plot: you and eddie have been seeing each other for a while but just as things are getting good, he self destructs and pulls away.

character: eddie munson x reader

As soon as you see his black van parked at the school, you're determined to hunt him down. He's clearly been avoiding you for the last two weeks and you want to know why. Was he not interested in you anymore? Did he want things to end? Was he going through something? You didn't know but you needed to; you couldn't just have nothing from him so you were going to do whatever it took, whether it meant missing classes or even skipping school completely, you'd do whatever it took to get to the bottom of this.

Things between you and Eddie had just been getting good, you were getting to the stage where you were hoping that he'd ask you to be his girlfriend and then he just... left. Whatever the reason, you needed to know. You liked Eddie, god you really liked him and that's why you were pissed. You wanted this so bad, you wanted him so bad and maybe he didn't want you and honestly, it hurt a lot more than you'd care to admit.

You didn't know where he'd be so you found someone who would. It didn't take long to find the rest of the Hellfire Club, they were tucked away inside their dedicated room ranting about the new campaign that they were starting. When you barged in, they immediately shut up.

"Where is he?"

They glanced around at each other, stammering and red in the face.

Rolling your eyes, you put your hand on Dustin's shoulder, "Dustin," your voice turned from hard to sticky sweet, "Can you tell me where he is?" Poor Henderson. He was clearly under instruction to not let you know his location but as soon as you fluttered your lashes he spluttered out that Eddie was in Mr Muchnik's class prepping for a test that he'd previously failed. You patted Dustin on the shoulder, "Thanks, kid," as Mike Wheeler hissed 'dude he's gonna kill you'.

On the walk to Muchnik's all you could think was that you hoped he didn't have a class first thing because you wanted this all sorted with Eddie, you didn't want to have a bunch of kids walk in on your - what you presumed would be - heated discussion.

When you walked in, Eddie was hunched over the table, scribbling things down, "Henderson, I told you not to bother me-"

"Munson!" The roar of your voice startles Eddie, making him jump and cower like a dog who's being scolded for chewing on the couch cushions.

Quickly, he jumps up, "I-I gotta go, sorry, really gotta run!" He excuses himself and tries to scuttle away.

"And you're just abandoning all your work, huh?" You ask, arms crossed over your chest. Eddie looks back to the mess he's left on the desk, the important mess on the desk, "You won't mind if I just tear it all up, would you?" Eddie's eyes narrow as he weighs up the situation in his mind. Would he really let you destroy his hard work just for the purpose of avoiding talking to you for even longer? Seriously?! "I just had to flirt with a goddamn twelve year old so you're going to fucking speak to me, Eds!" You hiss, annoyed and still slightly mortified with flirting with Dustin.

Eddie almost laughed, he would've had the tension not been too much, "Fuckin' Henderson man..." He mutters under his breath before realising that right now is not the time for jokes. He relents with a heavy sigh, "Okay, let's talk."

You're standing, arms crossing frowning at him. He's looking at you as though you're the one who needs to do some explaining and your patience wears thin, "Well?" It's harsher than you really intend it to be but Eddie doesn't flinch, instead he shrugs one shoulder, scratching the back of his head.

"I don't really know what to tell you."

You're fucking pissed and he knows it. It takes every ounce of self control to not rip him to shreds, "Start with why you've been avoiding me." Your voice is sticky sweet but with an edge; a knife dipped in honey.

His composure changes from that of being skittish to being... indifferent? "I'm damaged goods, sweetheart," he says, hands spread out in a 'what you gonna do about it' gesture, "what more can I say?"

"The fuck are you talking about?" You're angry, he sees it burning in your eyes and he doesn't blame you. He'd be angry too if you'd avoided him for two weeks with no sort of rhyme or reason. It's like he doesn't care, like it's fun to mess you about but the real reason is that he does care; so much, maybe even too much, "What does that mean?"

"Damaged goods," he repeats, voice more serious this time, "I'm broken, fucked in the head, a mess... Any of them work better for you?" He sounds bitter, annoyed at himself almost.

You roll your eyes, "I know what it means, Munson, I just want to know why that's reason enough for you to avoid me for two weeks when things were just getting good."

It's Eddie's turn to be confused, "Because I'm a mess. Why would you care about me? I'm not worth it so I decided for you."

You roll your eyes, "How about you let me decide what I can and can't handle? Eds..." At the sound of your nickname for him, his face softens and he suddenly can't look directly at you anymore. Shame burns in his stomach. Could you really care about him? Has his insecurities caused him to push you away? Your demeanour changes and all of your anger vanishes. You're not angry. Your heart aches for him in this moment. You reach out for him, he doesn't react, "I thought things were going really well, I stupidly thought that you were..." You trail off, shaking your head with a bitter laugh.

"That I was what?" Eddie presses quietly.

"That you were gonna make it official soon," you say with a shrug, "I don't care if you're broken or if you're a mess - have you met anyone who's not a bit of a mess or a little fucked?! I have issues too, Eds, I struggle as well. You just have to trust that I care about you because..." he finally raises his head to look at you, "I do. I do care about you."

He laughs humourlessly, "Why? Why do you even care about me? I'm a freak, no money, no friends, nothing."

"Because you're you, Eddie. You're funny, always making me laugh even when I'm mad or upset. You're so sweet. When we started this thing I didn't really see you as a sweet or caring guy but my god you are. You came and picked me up at 3am from Olivia's party, drunk as a skunk and then I puked in your van and you didn't care. You still called me pretty and helped me get home safe, didn't complain about the state of your van or anything. Spending time with you is so fun. Before we started hanging out, I don't remember when I'd had this much fun. Eds, you mean so much to me and I don't get why you don't see how fast and hard I'm falling for you!" The last part was a secret that you'd meant to kept locked up and as soon as you say it, you take a sharp intake of breath, "I-I- fuck."

Eddie smiles, a real smile that reaches his eyes and crinkles the corners, "You mean all of that?" He steps towards you.

Your cheeks burn hot, "Yeah, I do."

"All of it? You accept me for my flaws and all?"

Again, you agree.

"You promise?" He asks, "I'm giving you an out right now. If you're not sure, if you don't think this is a long term thing... get out while you still can because I want you and once I have you," he's standing right in front of you, chests centimetres from touching, "I'm never gonna let you go." His breath fans over your face and you find yourself closing the gap between the two of you.

"I'm all in," you whisper, eyes boring into his.

He grins but you barely get a chance to see it before his lips are on yours, warm and fast. It's not a long kiss, no those tend to happen in the back of his van, but it's enough for now.

He pulls back, pressing your foreheads together, murmuring an apology to you, "I'm sorry," he starts, "I- I got kinda in my head. Couldn't understand why someone like you would date someone like me." Instead of replying, you kiss him again. He tastes familiar - cigarettes and coffee.

"Oh," he says, pulling back, "we're totally in a relationship now by the way if you didn't know." He speaks quick before kissing you again. Your hands tangle in his hair as he backs you against the wall. You missed him; you missed this. You just hoped that you'd be able to prove to him that no matter what he was - damaged goods or not - then you'd be here to help repair the pieces.

[possamble]

I know we don't get much of Marcille's pov in "A little creature who loves you" but what we've been able to glean from her expression of anger at Falin in the fifth chapter and the (surprisingly but extremely welcome as it made the smut hit the spot even more) deep dive into what feeds Marcille's behaviour in "The Dragoness of Melini", you've written Marcille's self-centeredness and narcissism in an extremely poignant way. You really get the feeling that she *does* want to do good and make the world better but overcorrects by trying to control those around her, which people like Namari interpret as purely wrong. I'm a trans girl with NPD (same as the anon recommending Bellwether's zine) and I fucking love what you're doing with Marcille on that front (and many other fronts).

THANK YOU for understanding what I'm trying to do with Marcille fjsjkdkf so many people try to reduce her to her control issues or file them off altogether but. I just. Even when people are able to acknowledge her multitudes I've always wanted to take it a step further where her wish to do good and be good isn't opposed to her fussy neurotic narcissism, but but enmeshed together as one core and unique part of her personality. She loves being deferred to and respected as an authority because it makes her feel important AND because it enables her to help and be useful to other people. Her desire to help people is fueled by a desire to feel important and respected and her desire to feel powerful and important is motivated by her desire to help people and it's not a black and white good or bad thing that can be separated.

Sorry this is jdkdkf turning into another Marcille rant but. My blorbo. I wish more people could see how, despite a lot of emotional hypocrisy in interpersonal relationships (via her inability to understand other perspectives), she holds herself to the same high standards she imposes on others. She is a control freak about herself first and foremost. You never see her more despondent than the times she has failed to meet her own expectations, and furthermore, caused trouble for other people because of it.

In some ways, she's a pathetic little wet cat with the backbone of a drippy eclair. In others, she's a fucking iron fist that will not tolerate failure or weakness in herself. Sometimes she gets a little too smug and peacocks around in her own accomplishments while fishing for more praise. Others, she thinks that doing an insane amount of work in service of other people is the bare fucking minimum that she expects no praise for while berating herself when she can't meet her own requirements. She has the pathetic ridiculousness of a constantly-distressed diva and the fiery dignity of a dragon AND the vulnerability of a terribly lonely girl and just.

She's terrible and projects her own expectations on other people far too often. She's wonderful and at heart just wants to help people. She's neither and just wants to feel a little less lost and a little more loved in a very big world. She's horrid AND fully capable of growing past it in ways not everyone acknowledges so I'm just happy my vision for her resonates with other people djsjdjf

[likealittleheartbeat]

Rant time: the general atla fandom’s resistance to zukaang highlights a lot of problems in current fandom and fiction. The resistance is about a point around which we refuse imagination and connection. Specifically, we observe fiction as something to gaze at rather than to connect with. So, aang is denied desire because of his age, religiosity, and racially-linked gendered embodiment, which, this conservative portion of the fandom argues, should deny us to relating to or even considering his subjectivity.

“You’re Just A Child”: Aang’s Age

When it comes to shipping aang, suddenly the conversation becomes about the canon--the age gaps, the immaturity, the cultural ties. 12 years old is prime middle school age in the US, the very essence of sexual development. But many fandom members are not engaging with how they felt and experienced that age. Instead, they’re viewing Aang from a separate vantage point and expecting the same mental process from others. These are where the claims of p*do come from when talking about him within shipping. They suggest that engaging with his character is a desire to observe him voyeuristically since many in the fandom are not actually twelve (ignoring the fact that many fandom members are also significantly older than the other characters they adore and offer subjectivity). Their argument continues that it’s not possible to empathize with him. Only objectification is possible, especially in regards to sensuality, as if that is a category has a different process of psychological relating than all others. 

But all this becomes most important for these fandom members when putting him in relationship to the other slightly older characters. These arguments must begin by ignoring the fact that most fanfics and art for the zukaang ship and most ships in the atla fandom are simply disengaged from the canonical ages of the characters. A ton of the works are aged up, and those that aren’t don’t discuss the ages because they are working on the assumption that everyone within their fic are at similar levels of maturity to engage with romantic feelings. At the end of the day, most artists and writers are more interested in exploring the dynamics between richly developed character traits that are pretty unrelated to the character’s ages. Still, ships with Aang, and especially Zukaang somehow receive the most attention for tensions due to the canonical ages (despite the creators disinterest in the topic). Even the Toph ships, which have a canonically younger character with bigger age gaps between her and her partners, don’t receive the same pervasive criticism as the Aang ships.

Avatar Aang: Aang’s Religion and Race

One reason is that he’s perceived as the “pure” cinnamon bun of the series; “pure” as in purile and “pure” as in puritanical. Plenty has been written about purity culture in the fandom, enough that I don’t feel a strong need to elaborate. However, I do want to point to Aang’s role as a religious figure, a monk, in the series. Perceptions crafted through the history of Christianity alongside the practices of many other religions associate religion and celibacy, which I think played into further discomfort with allowing Aang a sexuality. If this is your association, it would counteract Aang’s narrative development of wisdom and self-control to believe he might also be developing sexual maturity throughout the series. Of course, Zen Buddhist philosophies, which were majorly influential in developing the show’s themes and Aang’s character, allow for monks to have sex and get married, and they openly address issues of sex and sexuality. The deeply sexually conservative view held by purity culture then forces Aang, even moreso than other characters, into a de-sexualized pigeon hole.

A desexualized characterization is also a claim hefted onto East Asian men at a stupidly outrageous rate by Western culture. They’re allowed to be cute, mannered, wise, even cool, etc. but when it comes to a kind of subjective sexuality, East Asian men are emasculated (stemming from a deep history of Western colonialism/xenophobia and a specific kind of patriarchal ideology in Euro-America). The pacifistic Buddhist-inspired beliefs he practices especially render him as distinct from the rugged individualist of American masculinity and even the elitist intellectual masculinist of Western European cultures. Can masculinity exist without dominance? Can a relationship exist without antagonistic tension? Sure, we get the fluff ships, but where does that blur into and coexist with the erotic? Aang, as a character, forces the audience to consider the reality of his pain, desire, and strength, despite his refusal to demonstrate that in warfare and courtship. Among what manner would someone demonstrate these inner worlds if they won’t exert them on subjugated bodies? It’s a conflict of worldviews that took shape dramatically during the height of colonization, where the colonized were often blamed and maligned for their failures to resist colonization. These beliefs then developed into stereotypes about the masculinity of different races. The stereotypes that have held on from colonialism alongside of unique cultural ideas about masculinity make Aang a hard figure for people indoctrinated into these beliefs to appreciate.

Aang’s Gender Expression

The fandom is forced to contend with his age, his colonized subjectivity, and, on top of all that, he’s denied the authority socially ascribed to his gender. Toph is the ‘tough guy,’ which Western audiences equate with more maturity, when what it actually equates to in the Euro-American psyche is masculinity. This correlation between masculinity and maturity allows Toph to escape the claims that make Aang an especially dangerous object for fanworks. Aang’s softness and passivity correlate him to femininity in this traditional perspective. Essentially, for the atla fans wearing their purity culture lenses, Aang, if sexualized, is feminine and therefore immature and therefore defenseless to predators. What’s wild is the way the Ember Island Players episode evokes and predicts these kind of reactions with its virginal damsel-in-distress actress depiction of Aang (”My hero!”).

But the zukaang ship really lends a microscope to the matter, because, in every demographic way, Aang’s character is denied the structural trappings of power within the relationship.This means that even those inclined to appreciate softer ideas about masculinity and/or more empowered ideas of feminine and colonized subjectivities can feel reticent to engage with the ship. Within an identity politic framework, the zukaang ship dynamics render Aang submissive: he is the colonized subject in relation to a colonizer; he is the more traditionally feminine partner; he’s more pious; he’s more passive; he is canonically younger. One might go even farther to suggest all of these submissive qualities make him seductive to Zuko in the narrative as he abandons his own nation for Aang, placing Aang in a trope familiar to both gender narratives within Euro-Christian traditions (the Biblical seductresses, like Eve and Jezebel, or more recently, Lolita) and colonial narratives (see, “Indian Princesses” or “Dragon Ladies”). If we go deeper into the archives we’ll also find colonial p*derast narratives (if you have a strong stomach, you can look up Andre Gide, as an example).  All these possible features make the relationship especially threatening to modern sensibilities. 

Now, I want to emphasize that there are legitimate reasons for the connections that we draw which ignite this fear. The article, “A Modern History of Groomer Politics” by Jesse Walker, lays out some of these complicated and hard-to-read histories, which illustrate how gay and queer rights (especially on the side of those assigned male at birth) became associated with p*dophilia.  The Homoerotics of Orientalism by Joseph A. Boone is another read that lays out why people are especially sensitive to age gaps within queer colonial contexts. Suffice it to say, to engage with the zukaang ship requires a deft touch not simply to avoid these histories and tropes but, as seen in many of the fandoms works, to challenge them. Still, the associations trigger reactions for people before they can process any of the actual content.

But even outside the zukaang ship, there is a sense that Aang’s gender expression and sexuality are so much more queer (even the Kataang ship, in its heterosexuality, is perceived as transgressive to the romance genre in comparison to the more traditional Z*tara ship because many people find it challenging to imagine Katara’s attraction to Aang and feel so much more drawn to relationships built around hierarchical colonial relationships rather than relationships that ignore the colonizer entirely). He’s inherently disruptive to the gender expressions that are considered acceptable in western tradition, especially by the hero of the story.

Within the context of the zukaang ship, Aang’s character becomes the most queered, though, and I think that’s deeply uncomfortable for a portion of fandom. They don’t know how to allow someone subjectivity who uses docility as his strength to grow and face the world rather than aggression. Instead, for them, Aang’s docility traps him within a perpetual childhood (or, at most, a eunuch-like domestic role for the queen, Katara). Even as they allow themselves to alter every other aspect of the fiction they love, they are at a loss to handle and develop his character in their works. His youth, his race, and his imperfect saintliness, are all upheld and braided together within the confines of purity culture to argue against the morality of rewarding him romantic and subsequently sexual relationships, and, at its worse, to depict him at all.

[cult-of-the-eye]

LEMME HEAR YOUR UNHINGED TMA RANTS! <3

Oooh I think I've already posted a lot of my rants but one of the characters who I haven't really had a whole rant on is Martin K blackwood.

THIS MAN. This man is so wonderfully written. A lot of characterisations of the "nice one" are quite flat and don't really expand much on them being nice apart from maybe giving the person low self esteem. What I love about Martin is how masterfully it uses that sort of prototype of a character and makes it much more gut wrenching and relatable. He starts off as sort of the office dunce from Jon's pov, which early on we also realise is unreliable. He's the bumbling idiot, the sweet fool and I get it. As a fat person, I feel like a lot of us feel pressured to be the comic relief or to put it more precisely, the one to be laughed at. And he's seen the gap in the archives, he's seen that role that needs to be filled and he's easily filled it. When you have the group of Tim and Sasha and then Jon, the only thing that could unite them is mutual awkward laughter towards Martin. And Martin is used to seeing what's there and filling the gaps, man is a people pleaser to a fault, he has had to guess what his mum didn't like about him and change accordingly, getting it wrong every time. He makes himself palatable which is so REAL especially for a fat person and/or traumatised people.

And then we see this more calculating side of him. He LIED to all his colleagues and his BOSS about a qualification to get a job and then kept that lie going for at least a couple of months. Listen, I don't think it's fair to label Martin as completely a manipulative calculating guy who's just put on a mask but it's also not exactly fair to characterise him as just a sweet, tea making guy who wears jumpers. And that's what I love about him. He's so complex. I feel like it delves into the idea of having both a saviour complex as well as an inferiority complex. He's had to make choices that are above his skillset early in his life and frequently, he's been blamed for causing other people's emotions so he naturally thinks he has control over how other people feel. Which gives him that sense of responsibility, like I can save anyone cause I can control their emotions, if I'm nice enough then they won't be mad/ill/sad/they'll love me. But at the same time, these sort of underhand methods of indirect communication don't resonate to him as causing any damage cause he doesn't actually think he's important enough to cause damage or have an impact on other people's lives

I don't think it's of any shock to anyone that my favourite Martin is angry Martin. It's the part that fights against both aspects of this inferiority/saviour complex because it 1. Is a path of direct communication. He has the opportunity to state exactly how he is feeling and the focus is on that rather than how can I get the other person to respond. 2. It recognises that he is important. Anger is in response to perceived injustice, frustration, annoyance and all of those things are in a way, self preserving. Obviously it's not good to do that too much (see: Tim Stoker) but there you go. I'm not saying angry Martin is perfect or anything but I'm saying that it's so satisfying and interesting to see cause it completely goes against the characterisation we've been given so far and it introduces a whole new facet to Martin - that he doesn't want to be ruled by his trauma and past experiences.

It's honestly a joy to see Martin develop into someone who fights more against the role he's been "given" while simultaneously playing into it. His whole Peter Lukas arc is very much a part of that. Essentially he's saying I'm not important enough to contribute the way you are (inferiority) but I'm still going to try and control things behind the scenes (saviour). So when Jon goes to save him it breaks that, he looks him in the eyes and tells him you, Martin K Blackwood are Important, you make an impact and you Mean Something. You don't have to save us all. It's such an important part of his character arc and honestly it blows me away every time I think about it.

Plus obviously the whole isolation thing is just so AGH it's just so built in to his character it makes complete sense that he has a tendency to isolate himself. It fulfills both the inferiority and saviour - he doesn't think he's important enough to be missed but also he feels like it'll push them into missing him. Solving the problem and putting himself down in one fell swoop.

Our final stage of Martin is one that is far from perfect, far from healed but absolutely closer than he was at the beginning. He shows more of himself, in working towards realising he makes an impact on people, telling jokes and just sharing his thoughts to Jon. So what does him stabbing Jon mean for this? Honestly I'm not entirely sure (I'm gonna be honest I did not realise this rant would be so long lol) but I'm thinking along the lines of this is an ultimate show of acceptance of his significance and rejection of his need to save people. He is committing the most direct act of all, he's doing this in the same need to help people but instead of being manipulative about it, he's just directly doing what needs to be done. But also he's not saving Jon, he's doing the complete opposite. He couldn't control Jon's response to the situation, as much as he wanted to, so he did what jon wanted. I might not be explaining this right cause I'm not entirely sure what I mean either but I'm trying to say it's a poetic end. It's separate from everything he was but in a way that's parallel to and pays homage to his struggles. He's still being sort of a saviour and he's still arguably not the most important person in this scenario but the point is that it's in a different way than he's used to. In my opinion, a better way.

Anyway yeah thank you for enabling me, I didn't know how much I needed this rant and I didn't know I had so much to say lol. <3

[vindelllas]

Bouncing off of the last post, what is the difference between revati chandra and revati surya?

the difference between your surya, chandra, and lagna - what determines planetary dominance the most (a revati case study) 🎀

🎀 i am so glad you asked this question because it alludes to a larger conversation in astrology: the differences and similarities between the manifestation of the same nakshatra in differing luminaries. you will likely find yourself relating to celebrities or familiar friends who share similar nakshatras or rashis as your top three, but wherein lies the difference between you both?

🎀 you surya is representative of the father, the king, power, authority, your soul, and the way you appear to other people. how bright your outward projection is depends upon the strength of your surya placement. surya controls the vital energy within you that drives you towards attaining fulfillment. whereas, your chandra is representative of the mother, the queen, intrapersonal and interpersonal emotions, mental clarity, familial relationships, and the matters of the mind. it is not inherently your intelligence (as this is under buddha's rulership), but how your emotions shape the expression and drive of your intelligence. additionally, your ascendent is considered the most important house in sidereal astrology, as it rules one's body and personality. do not confuse this with denoting luck, career, and wealth, as these are the more centralized likes of other houses in the chart. in my opinion, it is simply the basis for our being.

🎀 this is ultimately why the lagna is often said to influence one's appearance the most, as it is our core foundation. however, the potency and effectivity of your surya or chandra fluctuates depending on its placement and strength. for example, having a leo uttara phalguni surya in the first house tightly conjunct your lagna that serves as your atmakaraka is more likely to you make solar dominant than having a taurus krittika surya in your twelfth house that is conjunct shani and is your darakaraka. it is all about relativity and strength! this is ultimately why i encourage people to really explore their chart (as there are instances where your big three nakshatra's vimshottari rulers may not be your dominant grahas). look at your karakas, rashis, mahadashas, aspects, lagna lords, yogas, etc..

🎀 rant aside, how people interpret a nakshatra that occupies a chandra or surya is entirely dependent on the previous detailed factors. just remember your surya is the outer self, which can be altered according to your choice and situation while your chandra is the inner you, your true self. surya takes twelve months to traverse all rashis, i.e. remains for a full month within one rashi, therefore, the predictions made can be used for a single month. however, your chandra moves more quickly and is only in a particular sign for approximately two and a half days. Hence, the predictions on the basis of moon sign are more precise and accurate, therefore having a certain nakshatra in your chandra is considered to be generally more significant than your surya (relative planetary strength willing). to see this phenomena, let us examine the differences between different revati surya, chandra, and lagna natives

🎀 above are two revati lagnas, bette midler (left) and shakira (right). both natives look similar to one another with their slightly arched, high brows; almond eyes with a downturned inner corner, prominent nose, oval facial shape, defined cheek apples, and perfectly symmetrical lips. despite both women sharing no prominent placements (shakira is a shravana surya and punarvasu chandra native, midler is an anuradha surya and and swati chandra native), they both are comparable as far as physical facial appearance.

*see my previous post on rahu and shani's, specifically swati and anuradha, correlations to looking alike with other individuals

🎀 anya taylor-joy (left) and carly chaikin (right)

🎀 chaikin has an uttara bhadrapada surya and potential revati chandra. whereas, taylor-joy has an ashwini surya and potential revati chandra. despite both celebrities being potential revati natives, we can see their overall facial characteristic differences. despite them sharing similar nasal structure and facial shape, their eye distance, brow shape, and mouth shape are incredibly different. thus, suggesting that other grahas are influencing their appearance more so than revati.

🎀 paulina porizkova (left) christina moore (right)

🎀 moore is a revati surya and potential ashlesha chandra native. conversely, porizkova is revati surya, pushya chandra, and vishakha lagna native. interestingly, both women have shukra conjunct their surya within a degree. these two natives look more alike than taylor-joy and chaikin despite them having differing primary placement energies. this overall dominance of revati in their appearance (aforementioned lightly arched, high brows; almond eyes with a downturned inner corner, prominent nose, oval facial shape, defined cheek apples, and perfectly symmetrical lips) is likely attributable to their surya being their atmakaraka, meaning the graha most indicative of one's soul in their chart. therefore, it is likely these natives resonate more with their revati surya than other placements in their chart.

🎀 i hope this helped better understand the physical differences witnessed within different nakshatras. i hope to speak about the internal differences in a later post <3

* all of these placements were found using astrotheme/.com and/or astro-charts/.com. it is important to note that some chandra (moon) placements may be off by up to 6 degrees and lagnas (ascendants/rising signs) as well, due to the fact that many websites do not have 100% accurate birth times for the given celebrities.

xoxo, angel 💋

[rosegoldorigins]

Lego Monkie Kid Season 5

(Rant incoming... and guess who it is?

Li Jing. Of course it is)

______

Nezha: Dad these three are not-

Li Jing: Control yourself

Control yourself?!?!? Bro what?!?!

He didn’t say “silence” he said control yourself??!?!

As in “You know better than this”, “You are acting out”, “Don’t let you emotions/morals overcome you”

Nezha doesn’t need to “control himself” He doesn’t need to be a perfect neutral being.

He’s always strived to protect, guard and do the right thing. He meditates and spends years doing his duty.

The threat of his father's disappointment was always whether or not he could "control himself”?!?!

Whether he could look good (like in front of the underworld judges) and swallow his own desires in order to fulfil his duty?

His dad is giving I know this feels wrong and harsh but you need to do hard things for the greater good.

"Control yourself” means get it together this needs to happen (chaining Wukong).

I can’t imagine the effect those words would have on Nezha as he grew up.

(Parents don’t care about age they will put their principles and ideals on a three year old.)

Imagine child Nezha acting as children do and his father saying “control yourself”.

The shame of being a normal kid and then being called “undignified” by your father.

How much was Nezha denied in his self expression?

How often did he need to think about his image and how others would perceive him because his dad said it was more important than anything else?

Li Jing put his job above his son.

“Control yourself” I will not have an unruly child.

“Control yourself” Do not ruin my image.

[pumpkinsy0]

Tips on how to write Curly,Tim, and Angela Shepard??

asking MEEEE how to write the shepards??? im rubbing my hands together evilly i feel so honored to b asked this thank u sm<33

BUT, here r some important characteristics for their characters i think could help for writing em!! ill try to focus on things that r like, skimmed passed??? in fics??idk how to explain it

tim

-tim is a cool and collected guy, at most hes scarily calm!!! he has a good head on his shoulders and hes not ignorant to the problems in his life, and almost nothing gets past him, he knows whats wrong w his family and is very observant of it, unlike angela and curly. when it comes to tim, make sure things like his inner monologue and his movements is pretty composed and self controlled. when he thinks, he doesnt think half way, hes an analyzer and he dissects the world around him and tries seeing it for what it truly is, he doesnt let his emotions control him.

-he will always, ALWAYS, have his guard up!! even if its w small things like glancing around, always having back up plans, asking questions about before he even hangs out w em, etc etc, he can never be too sure, and he LIKES being informed, it bothers him so much if hes not, so hes always looking out. on top of that, on a regular ass day, i dont think hes OBVIOUSLY protective of angela and curly, he knows how they get when they feel cornered so he kinda???lets them do whatever???? tim being protective comes off as someone whos more annoyed than anything, other than someone who loves their family

for example he says things like: “i already said no, stop asking”, “didnt i tell u to bring ur blade with u”, things like that!!

-and finally, i think the only way u could actually get tim to b emotional, is if something happened to angela or curly. theyre literally his life lines, if it wasnt for them, he wouldve booked it half way across the country already. tim would be way more hostile and aggressive, its like hes coming apart, but thats rlly only when hes alone, out in public hes still pretty stoic but still agitated a bit more easily. everything he does at the end of the day is for them and while it may not seem like it, hes always thinking of them.

ps: hes quite honestly a lone wolf, he doesnt rlly have friends, ppl he hangs out w, ofc but friends??? eh, hes perfectly fine w being left alone w his own life, but thrives off of being around ppl bc he can use them to his advantage to further himself, but i dont say that in a “mwahahahah hes so manipulative and stone cold hearted😈” way

basically: for writing tim, make sure hes always coming off as a leader, hes always gonna have leadership qualities in whatever he does, so even the small things he does is important, it doesnt matter hiw small u think it is, if u feel like it shows his character, just add it in there. tim does have his limits, and its always gonna b curly and angela. kinda like darry, how he shows how he cares is just different and not understood, however for tim its to a higher degree.

NOW FOR CURLY☝🏽☝🏽

-im not gonna sit here n say that hes book smart, bc generally speaking, hes not, and this may b a bit controversial, but i dont think hes 100% street smart either!!! BUT hes not completely DUMB. while yes, hes not particularly smart in one aspect, hes not CLUELESS, he can grasp complex things and knows what to do, just not everything. ppl undermine him and overplay his stupidity so theyre surprised when he shows that he can b smart, and thats if they DO even realize that, its small when he shows hes smart, but he can have his moments, pls dont write curly as completely incompetent</333

for example: maybe tims trying to come up w a plan and bc curly knows the schedule of these ppl, hes actually a big help, but ppl just dont pay attention to how important that part of the plan was so they dont realize it, maybe ponys ranting to curly about something, and curly got pony to see another side of it he never rlly thought of before, but bc of how he said it, it doesnt “come off as intelligent” but it rlly is!!! i hope this made sense😭

-part of the reason of why he acts out is bc he looks up to tim, but hes not seen as smart like tim OR angela is, hes constantly compared to them both and while he loves being a shepard and loves his siblings, he wants to b seen as his own person and make something of himself!!! this however, can get him into trouble bc hes desperate to prove himself, to who??? to himself, to tim, and to a degree everyone else. im not gonna say curlys “all bark, no bite” bc he isnt, but he can definitely talk more than what he can rlly deliver and that gets him into shit as well and also thats what causes ppl to play up his stupidity. curly is pretty misunderstood and pushed to the side!!!

-i would say that curly being around others is important to write bc i feel like thats when he truly flourishes as a character. hes way more energized and pumped up, so when u write about curly around friends or whoever hes close to, make sure hes more relaxed, boisterous, and adventurous. however, when hes upset, id say hes sorta like tim, his eyes r the same, bit more analytical, and he uses the ppl around him. becomes less of a friend, more like a leader, hes not all buddy buddy, and if they try to joke around w him while hes mad, he pushes them away, tells them to shut up, its like a complete 180.

-if u wanna write about curly going through something, i feel like its important to realize that hes in denial about the problems in his life, not ignorant about it, its pretty in his face, its not like he cant say its not there, but hes just like “yea its bad, but its not THAT bad, i could push through it”, i think thats his way of coping w everything around him, but when hes pushed far enough and forced to come to terms w it, he does some irrational things to cope and turns to drinking

and last but definitely not least, my main girl angela

-she NEEDS to b around ppl, she THRIVES off of the attention of others and if she doesnt get it, shes on edge, she rlly doesnt like being left alone w her thoughts and needs something to distract her. and just like how curly and her r tims life lines, same could b said for curly and tim w angela. she needs her brothers as her support, and if they arent there, she tries to find it in other people, even if its only for a few weeks. bc of this, when it comes to this part of her character, in writing, id say that if u rlly want to make angela go through it, but for her problem to b solved, she goes to either tim or curly, BUT if u want to show that shes really desperate to b heard out, and she feels trapped in a corner, she tries to find comfort in someone else, usually through a romantic relationship. id say that it perfectly shows that for angela, her family means everything to her and she goes to them, BECAUSE she knows they have her back, but when she goes to try and find comfort in other ppl, it doesnt rlly work out or doesnt change, so shes just reminded that “at the end of the day, all u have us ur family and nobody else, ever”, which is a huge thing in her mind as thats just how shes grown up

•now, im sure we all see the shepards as poc, and considering this is the 60s (or 70s or whatever time period it rlly doesnt even matter, poc have never rlly been respected), i think to a degree, angela is sexualized, but its also a way she protects herself. i dont think angela is respected and thats for a multitude of reasons, its bc shes a woman, shes a shepard, and shes a poc, cards r pretty stacked against her. BUT, shes not clueless☝🏽, tim taught her from a young age about the world around her, bc he NEEDED to, its to SAVE her from getting taken advantage of. so to protect herself, she uses the things stacked against her, against em, she knows how hard it is to fight it, so why fight it when u can use it to help u is the way she sees it. and her being sexualized is just one of those things. angela in town is seen as “the forbidden fruit” ig u could say and she knows about it, so she uses the way how ppl see her as an object to use them as her puppet. they dont think shes aware so they dont rlly suspect much from her, hell, they dont even think she can fight, and theyre wrong w that. they just see her as an “easy” girl and if thats what they think, so be it, she’ll fuck w em one day, thats just her survival tactic and how she can survive. as far as this one goes, id say that its important to understand how the ppl around her interact w/see her, as that can help u understand what her next course of action will b, she NEEDS people in order to further herself, shes like tim in that aspect. however it will also somewhat impact how she sees herself, at the end of the day, shes still vulnerable but she doesnt let on, shes spent such a long time trying to cultivate how she wants ppl to see her and she doesnt want that ruined, she’ll do anything to keep that intact, ESPECIALLY lying. so if u want to write her coming loose emotionally, dont add small hints of it when shes in front of other ppl, MAYBE only when shes in front of tim or curly u can do that, if u wanted. in front of other ppl, she hardens up and comes off a little more smarter than she lets off, so she CAN b scary, and thats when ppl remember that shes a shepard. shes too grown for her own good but she just wants control in her life.

-speaking of her life, like curly, shes in denial about the things in her life, but its more so about how they impact HER. she knows their life is completely fucked, she knows how bad it is, but she just says it just doesnt hurt her as much, and to a degree, shes right, but then again, some days r harder for her than others, so while yes, shes vulnerable, this doesnt mean that she cant handle what tim and curly go through, shes not fragile, and i think thats important to remember, shes tough!!!she has to b, she will bite back if she has to. dont JUST write her in high school dramas, she has to deal w some of the gang issues curly goes through, while not AS much, its still there

-ANNDDDD FINALLLYYY, when it comes to angela, while yes, she is analytical, but she can let emotions drive her sometimes, and thats potentially her downfall, shes a pretty impatient person, so when she wants results, she wants it FAST, and it agitates her deeply if things dont go her way, some leadership qualities from tim rubbed off on her, she acts more like tim while curly looks more like him. when it comes to her inner dialogue, u should have a comfortable mix of her being observant and her having a bitttt confident and self assured, let her b a lil cocky!!!

i hope this helped u at least a little bit<3333

[bumblingbabooshka]

In your opinion, do Vulcan children have teddies (stuffed animals)?

YES!!!

Stuffed animals and other security items would be good for Vulcan children...I can imagine many small children needing them when they first learn how to meditate. They can also be used as a sort of 'anchor' so they are able to stay calm in unfamiliar situations. I can also imagine they would be used to express emotions without having to attribute them to themselves Ex: "[Toy] feels sad because you ate the last cookie." and a parent could then help the child through that emotion via them both teaching 'the bear' what to do when 'it' feels sad. This way the child feels like they're also helping rather than feeling like they're being lectured. Toys are, I imagine, one of the first things that we learn to take care of and be kind towards. As a child it's probably one of the few things we feel is under 'our care' or control. I imagine how children treat toys is observed carefully...it can be a good outlet (a child may rant to a toy when they don't like something while remaining composed in the situation itself) but also if a child is consistently violent with toys it may be indicative of an emotional issue. Creativity, imagination, and play are also not things which seem to conflict with Vulcan adherence to logic. Play is very important for children and I imagine it's often used to make sense of the world around them or what they feel (Ex: Playing 'House') I imagine you can often see Vulcan children playing by mimicking violent or emotional behavior and then scolding the toy for being violent...you can't hit! You have to take deep breaths and meditate. Oh no, [toy] is crying! Don't cry, you must calm down! Or they might play by exploring new ideas and desires through the realm of fantasy with a familiar object, the toy. Toys are also useful (I imagine, I'm not a psychologist just reflecting on my own experiences) for building a sense of self in a way...during the course of play you can discover what you like and don't like, what calms you down and what intrigues you. You can also learn how to interact with others through games and play as a child. Lessons like how to share, how to work together, how to include others in your world...very important! So yes, I think that toys and play are important - especially for a species which is inherently very emotional. Vulcan Children probably have much less control than adults do and require more tangible methods of calming down, understanding/confronting their emotions etc. Now I'm imagining a 'growing up' ritual wherein children decide they're too old for their toys and ready to give them up. They then work to emotionally detach themselves from them. At the end of this process the children give the toys to someone else (a sibling, a friend, a neighbor, or just donating them)

[class-1b-bull]

Class 1-b reacting to you, their best friend (and/or lover), being the UA traitor.

Awase -

Completely shattered, that nomu that almost killed him and Yaoyorozu in the forest was caused by you feeding the Lov information. He starts questioning every moment you two have ever had together. He honestly gets pissed at himself and you and everyone around him because he doesn't know how to handle it.

Sen -

He loved taking pictures of the two of you. You two had an entire photo album dedicated to all the little moments, every time you beat him in your favorite card game or that little drawing eri did of you two being held up by you. All of those memories captured with the same camera you got him for his birthday are now being turned to ash in a fireplace. He cant help but be still while something once so important suddenly means nothing to him.

Kamakiri -

He was the loudest when he realized. He couldn't stop him self from screaming at you for what youve done. He hates you. Youve almost killed him and his classmates ten times over but that wont stop him from wanting you to stay. Deep down he wanted it all to be a cruel prank you were pulling. But it never was.

Kuroiro -

He tried to keep it together. He really did. But at the end of the day he was barely able to make it to his dorm room in time before he broke down completely. His nonchalant front, completely shattered. He sobbed to the point he was choking on his tears. You were one of the only people who he really cared for, so why did you betray him like this?

Kendo -

She tries to save you. She tries to understand why you did this. Were they forcing you? Are they keeping someone close to you hostage? Are you being manipulated or controlled? The more she tries to understand, the more questions she askes the harder it becomes to understand her as she starts to breakdown at your feet.

Kodai -

She didnt say anything but she truly wanted too. She wanted to yell, scream and cry. She wanted to hit you for what you put the class through but she wanted to hug you as you were dragged away in cuffs. She was so conflicted about what she wanted to do. Her brain and heart were arguing over you but in the end she just ended up doing nothing, which ended up hurting a lot more than it should have.

Komori -

She seems more confused and in denial than anything else at first. She starts to distance herself from people and holes herself up in her room while she tries to understand what happened. Was everything you two did together meaningless? She could never forgive you for what you did, she hated you but at the same time she wanted you to walk through her dorm room door ranting about your new favorite thing like you always did.

Shiozaki -

Shes not mad or even that sad about your betrayal. Just disappointed. She would try to understand and she truly wants to forgive you, but she cant bring herself to do that. She would distance herself from everyone and it would take a while before shes ready to move forward again.

Shishida -

He tried to keep it together but it was really hard for him to do that since he was feeling hundreds of emotions in seconds. His breathing became uneven as he tried to assess the situation from a logical perspective and his voice breaks as he simply asks you "why?"

Shoda -

He really values trust so when you betrayed all of UA he was never the same. He tried to recover but he keeps everyone at arms length. When you first left, he was on the more 'ok' side of things. But after a few weeks and what happened had time to sink in is when it hits the hardest.

Pony -

She cant stop herself from screaming at you while tears run down her face. She switched to english because its easier for her so no one knew exactly what she was saying to you. Even if you could speak english you wouldent understand what she was saying between the sniffles and gasps of air.

Tsubaraba -

Hes in denial for so long when it originally happened. When you were officially revealed as the traitor he thought it was a joke. He started to calmly talk to you with simple phrases like "jokes like that arnt that funny yk." But over the next minute it would turn in to him begging for it to be a joke while completely breaking down in front of you.

Tetsutetsu -

He does everything he can to get answers out of you. Some other classmates of his have to hold him back from running over to you and punching you square in the stomach. He ends up staying in the UA gym for a few hours after curfew, beating a punching bag in anger and confusion until eventually he wears himself out and collapsed from exhaustion.

Tokage -

She wants to know why you did it. If there was a reason she could find it in herself to forgive you but if not, it would become better for her to act like you never exist. For a long time after that she would leave when your name was mentioned or anything that reminded her of you would suddenly be destroyed or hated by her as much as she hates you. Deep down however, she still wants to be you friend

Manga -

He blames himself more than he blames you. Hes supposed to be a hero so why couldn't he save the one person he cared about the most. Youre gone forever now and he blames ever but of it on himself. He cries a lot for the next couple weeks and sometimes he can feel himself wanting to send you a funny meme he found only to remember and go through all the heartbreak all over again.

Honenuki -

Another that blames it all on himself but at the same time he is really depressed about it. He heals for the most part but part of him still gets a little wave of sadness whenever he walks past your favorite cafe or when someone does that very specific hand movement that you used to do all the time. Every part of the situation breaks his being completely, and he even becomes slightly more hostile towards the people he spars with.

Bondo -

He stays silent for the most part. His silence being a mixture of disbelief and hurt. He even tries to help the rest of the class through it. He becomes the class therapist while he ends up insisting hes fine and dealing with it alone in his dorm room. He cant bring himself to destroy the memories of you so he simply puts them in a box and hides them under his bed.

Monoma -

Incredibly angry about it at first but the more time that passes the more it hurts him. The more he starts to blame himself. If he had an inferiority complex before it definitely worsened now that you betrayed him. You helped him through so much yet he cant help but feel it was all nothing to you.

Reiko -

she handles it better when in front of the class, or at least she tries too. She broke down once you were revealed, she broke down when you left and she breaks down every time shes behind closed doors. She cant handle seeing anyone right now.

Rin -

He keeps calm at first and tries to rationalize. "Were you forced to against your will? Were you being controlled? Brainwashed?" With every 'no' to his questions he became more and more desperate to prove you werent evil. He started to lose his cool and break down in front of you while still begging for any sign that your not evil. At the end of the day he finds himself grabbing onto a random stuffed animal you left in his dorm and using it to muffle his tear filled screams.

Bro imma be honest half of these characters I had no idea what to write. So half of them are probably bad but im not gonna proof read or change this because we die like men.