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love-quinn · 1 year ago

Text

— COLLECTORS' GUIDE

summary — you love books, and spencer can't figure out why you don't have a single one inside your apartment. his only solution is, of course, to buy you some.

warnings — swearing, reader has a toxic ex

pairing — spencer agnew x fem!mythical reader

pronouns — none (you/yours)

featuring — spencer agnew, nicole enayati, vianai austin (mentioned), kiana parker (mentioned)

word count — 1.8k

note — as someone who LOVES mythical kitchen i've been toying around with the idea of spencer and someone from that show or even just mythical in general, also she was speaking to me she told me she's a bookworm i don't make the rules sorry. thank you so much for all the love on my last two spencer fics <333 hope you enjoy

LA’s a big city; it’s loud, it’s dirty, and it’s busy. Working in the industry you do, you don’t have a whole lot of calmness in your life, which is why you make it your personal mission to make your apartment as soft and cozy as possible.

You pile your couch with throw blankets and pillows, you have lamps where you can control the brightness, you hang art on the walls and you love it there. You layer your rugs and you keep candles on every shelf. Your apartment is one hundred percent yours, and that’s the reason Spencer likes spending time there as much as he does.

You and Spencer are a fairly new couple, you’ve only been together a few weeks, and he still can’t quite believe the two of you are together. You work in the Mythical side of the office as a producer and sometimes on-camera for Mythical Kitchen so the two of you see each other fairly often but not every single day.

He likes to think he knows you pretty well – he is your boyfriend. But one of his favorite parts about being in this relationship with you is getting to learn more about you. Neither of you are shooting anything today so he decides to drop by your desk during his lunch break. You’re on yours too, you and Nicole are chatting across your desks, you have half a wrap in one hand and a folded over paperback novel in the other and Spencer brightens at seeing you.

“Hi, babe,” he drops a kiss on your hairline, leaning over and peering at what you’re doing. “I was gonna see if you wanted to go for lunch with me but you seem to have it covered.”

You tilt your head back to look him in the eye, face lighting up. “Hi! I didn’t know you were coming over here.”

He shrugs, leaning on the back of your chair. Nicole excuses herself to go meet Vi for lunch like they planned and offers Spencer her chair while she’s gone so he doesn’t have to hover. Spencer watches you smile up at her as she leaves and can’t stop the frown from making its way onto his face.

“You’re not going with them?” From what he knew, the three of you were really good friends, at the very least close coworkers. Seeing Nicole talk about her plans with your mutual friend right in front of you without inviting you felt… not wrong, but definitely weird.

You just shake your head. “No, Thursdays I usually eat by myself, they go out somewhere.” You catch the look on Spencer’s face and amend yourself quickly. “They do invite me, I just prefer to eat my lunch at my desk, I can get a chapter or two in before they get back.”

Spencer looks down at the paperback in your hand again. “What’re you reading?”

You hold it up for him. It’s an older book, with frayed edges and a peeling vinyl cover, a grainy lighthouse on the front. He takes it when you offer it and flicks through it, careful not to disturb the bookmark. “I was gonna take it back to the library on Saturday and get a new one, but I can come over after that?”

Spencer shakes his head, only now just seeing the Los Angeles Public Library sticker on the back cover. “Can I come with you? Unless that’s like, something you wanna do by yourself or whatever? I didn’t know you went to the library.”

You take the book back and put it on your desk, out of the way. You and Spencer have wordlessly begun to split the wrap that you’d packed for lunch, something you’d made at home that made his mouth water. “Yeah, of course you can come. I go most weeks, I try to read a book every week but sometimes, y’know,” you gesture around the office.

That’s how Spencer finds himself on the steps of the LAPL for what he believes to be the first time. He’d been to libraries before, obviously, but not since leaving Florida, and not for a long time. He knows you like to read, there’s often a paperback in your hand or your purse or your car, it’s your quiet time activity. He just assumed you bought your own books, but getting to walk hand in hand with you through the stacks as you browse, he definitely sees the appeal.

You find your new book of the week and hold it up to him gleefully, and you don’t even have to pull him along to the desk for him to follow you dutifully. Spencer would let you stay in there for hours, gazing lovingly over at you as you talk familiarly with the librarian.

Eventually, you cut yourself off and excuse yourself to return to your boyfriend, knowing that his ideal weekend plans probably didn’t include letting you drag him around the library. You really like Spencer, you don’t want to hijack all of your time together.

Spencer hasn’t even considered that. In fact, he is actively planning the next time that the two of you can come back, desperate to see you so happy again. Desperate to make you that happy.

It becomes almost a routine. The two of you begin your weekend by going out for breakfast somewhere, Spencer follows you around the library and then the two of you go home and spend the rest of the day quietly in one of your apartments. Usually it involves him playing Zelda on the couch with your feet in his lap while you churn through your book.

You fold around each other comfortably. You have your separate friends, your separate jobs (well… technically separate), and your separate hobbies. But as the weeks turn into months, Spencer sinks right into your little oasis in your apartment.

His clothes end up in your drawers, he starts going in to work with homemade meals that are obviously made by someone who graduated culinary school (i.e, not him). Love pours endlessly out of every crevice, and Spencer feels like he’s drowning in it. Spencer loves his apartment, it’s his home, but as somebody who also loves you he loves your apartment a lot as well.

It feels like every single time he goes over he finds out something new about you and the way you love, which is why he’s not quite so sure why it took him so long to notice the empty shelves in your room.

You’re on your phone, lying on your stomach with your feet by the head of the bed. Spencer is just coming back from the kitchen, your coffee order in his hand when he notices it. “Are you gonna put something on that shelf?”

You look up from your phone to see the shelf he’s gesturing to. Spencer can’t pretend not to notice the way that your face falls. “Uh, sure. I can if you want?”

Spence shrugs as he comes to sit down beside you. You wriggle up so you’re sitting and take the coffee out of his hand. “I don’t care, babe. It’s your room.” He plants a kiss on the side of your face and swiftly moves on. “I just remembered on Saturday I made plans with Kiana, so I’m gonna have to skip the library, I’m sorry.” He does seem genuinely sorry to be missing out on the time spent with you, you deflate subtly.

“That’s totally fine,” you return his kiss. “Tell her I say hi. I’m not done with my current one anyway, so I might just stay home.” You love the library, you spend a lot of time there, but you’re looking forward to a nice morning by yourself at home. Then, you remember the date and groan quietly under your breath. “Never mind, I have to go in to renew it anyway, or else I’ll get another late fee.”

You’d only ever returned a library book late once in your entire life, something that Spencer found completely adorable. Especially so the fact that you viewed it as such a big deal.

“I guess that’s the price you pay for them being free,” Spencer points out.

You hum, “I wouldn’t mind having one or two that I get to keep,” you say it so concretely, so nonchalantly. As though it’s not actually something you’re able to do.

“Why don’t you buy a couple?”

You glance over at the empty shelves. “‘Cause it’s like, childish?”

Spencer frowns, sitting up straighter. “Babe, do you think I’m childish?”

You rush to fix your mistake. “No! Of course not, that’s not at all what I meant-”

Spencer takes your hand, putting the empty coffee cup on your nightstand. It’s filled with his things and that makes his heart swell. “No, I know you weren’t calling me childish. But do you think I am?” When you shake your head, he continues. “I have like, video game bullshit all over my place. You’re not childish for having things that you like in your apartment. Plus, books are like the most normal out of all collectibles.” His eyes are deep and sincere and you roll your heels underneath you, moving so your legs are spread out in front of you. “You want books? Buy a million fucking books, babe.”

You sigh, biting your bottom lip. “I know, it’s… I used to have stuff on that shelf,” you admit. “I had a bunch of books, I’d been collecting some of them since I was a kid and everything. My last boyfriend he, well. Doesn’t matter, long story short, I came home from work one day and they were all gone.”

Spencer is probably the last guy you’d expect to see involved in a fistfight. He’s 5 '6, he loves Hawaiian shirts and there is video evidence of him Fortnite dancing. But more than that, though, he loves you, which is why his first instinct is to go find whoever it was that did that and fuck them up.

“That’s so messed up?” He can’t even wrap his head around it. “Babe, what? No, oh my god.” He can’t even formulate a coherent sentence. You love so liberally, so generously, that the idea that someone had thrown away something you love made him physically sick.

“I’m so sorry that he did that to you, that’s fucked. Not your fault you know how to read and he doesn’t.” That makes you laugh, your chest shaking as you lean into him. He wraps an arm around you and kisses your temple, rubbing your forearm gently.

He and Kiana have plans on Saturday, and he has no intention of bailing on them, but that doesn’t stop him from pulling out his phone and texting her, asking if she’d be willing to make another stop with him while they were together.

The next Saturday, you get home from renewing your library book to find your boyfriend waiting out the front of your apartment. He beams at you as you reach him and you don’t have to look inside the box to know that once you stop kissing him you’ll find the beginnings of your next book collection.

#spencer agnew x reader #spencer agnew #spencer agnew fic #smosh x reader

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cafeconbrujeria · 2 months ago

Note

You must stop holding out on us. Where did you get your green ocean binder/note cover?

Chicken! I'm flattered and delighted.

It is the hokusai wave journal from Oberon Designs in the teal color, and it is built like a TANK.

Many years ago, I lost most of my material possessions to flood damage. The journal cover, which was my bullet journal setup at the time and not my grimoire, was covered in disgusting skunky gunky disgusting flood water. After throwing out the inner contents, I figured I had nothing to lose, so I tossed the journal cover into...the washing machine. With some dr. bonner's liquid soap. On a normal cycle. I think I put it through the dryer, too, for a little, on low, though I ultimately dried it in the sun. Somehow, this was fine. Then I reconditioned with straight up coconut oil, and it's somehow both lusciously soft and still absurdly sturdy. This was years ago and this baby is still going strong, and I am not easy on my working items. I mention this because Oberon Designs did a limited release a while back with the Rider Waite Smith Fool card on it, and I bought it to make a more obvious grimoire, but because it's new it feels so stiff and like an entirely different product. But it isn't! It just hasn't had the shit beat out of it yet. So my point is: these things take a TON of abuse. They're absurdly well made. They're pricey, for notebook covers, but like. Worth it, imo.

More caveats: I don't actually use it entirely as intended because I have it set up midori traveler's notebook style, because I love a modular set up. Because it's the American half latter size and I have several elastics in there, I can just fold paper in half and scribble away on my makeshift notebook insert. Or I can print things out booklet style, and put that in there. And I buy those slim cheap roughly 5.5 × 8.5 kraft cover notebooks in bulk and burn through them as necessary, because for me, the grimoire is more a lab notebook and less a coffee table book, though the covers are so nice that they probably deserve a fancy grimoire.

in THEORY, the modular grimoire is also an all in one travel altar and all I need to pack for witchcraft while traveling. in actual reality, I've never travelled light in my life.

and now, because I've been given an excuse, thank you so much...here are some example pages. still sandy from last time I took The Book to the beach.

Starting with bookmarks:

For operative reasons, there is an antique key in there. I found a flat one, so that's nice, for the notebook format. The moon and stars charm is also from Oberon Designs--they tend to throw in a little freebie with their orders. I was trying to DIY a little in grimoire black mirror for a while, and none of my attempts really worked, and then i just made the St. Cyprian chaplet with the black mirror there, so--I'm not sure why this is still in here but why not. Why are there pressed flowers in here sometimes? It's a working item, baaaaebeee. All kinds of shit happens here.

reference materials:

like I said, I wanted a written by hand/printables for ease of use hybrid format so that's what I have. pictured: some sigils and reference notes for the dia de los reyes workings I always forget about until the absolute last minute so that I'm frantically running around the house very January 6.

etc

but fundamentally this grimoire is my grimoire so there's silly things in it because I am a silly person with ADHD who is also in a rush everywhere absolutely at all times. here is an origami dragon who lived in my wallet for many years--extremely effectively, so witchblr really does sometimes offer some fun yet useful ideas. also here are some fruit stickers? also my dog. also on the opposite page pictures I do not wish the internet to see. the big red envelope came with uhh...a mini waffle iron? shaped like a heart? and now houses a paper based charm. It's sturdy enough to take out of the grimoire and toss into a purse when necessary. also: kraft notebook with painter tape label.

further etc

I love journaling and notebooks in general so I have a lot of purchased and DIY folders and stuff in here, obviously. fu talisman from when I was reading the tao of craft. absolute banger of a talisman; very strong for what I needed/need it for. see also: pocket playing card meaning thing I do not use at all whatsoever. st jude card from seraphin station. ruler in case I need to make straight lines.

storage (and etc)

and here is my very DIY storage solution, which is: a slider ziploc bag and some medical tape. dr jose gregorio hernandez wallet card from, again seraphin station, who is also on here as @karmazain. background photo print of a Baron Samedi veve, for ritual focus or you know, whatever. big holy card of la caridad del cobre, aka our lady of charity, who is also Oshun or at least Oshun's catholic mask, depending on who you ask and how they look at it (maferefun oshun, of course, forever and ever). packet of black pepper and unseen similar packet of salt for some REALLY on the go magic, if necessary. big sticker / feng shui amulet of the three celestial guardians, which is usually tucked into the pocket flap meant to secure a notebook.

and ta da! far more information than you asked for! but I love witchy gear, i love talking about our gear, I LOVE LOOKING AT PEOPLE'S BOOKS, so.

#grimoire

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sesshy380 · 3 days ago

Note

nice to see you using your fic rec tag again 🥹 was wondering if you had any specific authors you could rec cause iiii am in the mood to binge some fics (already been through all of yours by now hehe)

I am both excited and embarrassed that you've been through all of my fics lol (there are a few that while I own up to the cringe of writing them, I am still very much hiding my face lol)

As far as author recs, sadly I don't really have anything new since I haven't been reading as much as I'd like to. This past year has been chaotic and left me very little time to sit down and read the backlog of fic updates, not to mention even touch my TBR's.

BUUUUUT....

I know how authors love getting notifs and potential new readers, so I'll throw out my usual's plus a few (I'm gonna dig deep through my bookmarked list lol)

Obligatory disclaimer: READ THE TAGS, I like stuff that pushes the boundaries.

crushedmary - Gotta throw Sair's stuff here ofc (@crush3dmary).

Resuri - I can't make a list without reccing @resuri-art lol

QueenBastet - Sadly, we lost this amazing author. She will always be on my rec list. She really had a way with writing the Puzzle boys that I absolutely loved.

BladeofM - Also known as @micheladee, is the author of one of my faves, Eldritch Encounter. Not only did this fic introduce me to the indescribable awesomeness that is @andr0nap's art, but I fell in love with BladeofM's writing style.

atlas_x - Also known as @x-atlas-x, If you like smut, look no further than Atlas.

YadonushiRyou - Also known as @millenniumringg, and author to The Cornered Collection.

MMMOTH - Also known as @apathetic-theme-song, is author to Kill Shot, as well as several other good fics.

Ninjam117 - @ninjam117 is another of my must rec authors based on their Role Play AU.

SaijSpellheart - @saijspellhart is author of Chained to You.

Sitabethel - @sitabethel has a loooong list of fics to look through lol

LadyHenbane - @ladyhenbane is a new addition to my subscription list.

daisytealeaves - Looking through my list of bookmarked fics and I see a lot of @daisytealeaves. Why I haven't subbed already is beyond me.

Yusariis - @yuusaris is another that I for some reason I have a lot of bookmarked fics, but for some reason I haven't subbed lol.

IAmAllYetNotAtAll - @iamallyetnotatall (I am really going to have to look into all of these authors I have bookmarked a bunch of fics but not subbed lol)

Melodic - Another author that I think I found via someone elses rec, so unfortunately don't have the tumblr username right offhand.

lossen - @sowideasea loves doing to Atem what I do to TKB, and that is snapping that bitch like a glowstick and shaking him until he's crying and begging for it all to stop lol.

puzzle_d - sadly their blog appears to be deactivated, but this is another author who's smut I enjoy reading lol.

kitsuneFaux - @kitsunefaux writes my favorite flavor of Ryou

justapal - @justapalspal writes some amusing stuff that reminds me of the old FFN days when authors just had fun with the characters (and I love that sort of stuff as much as I love angst lol)

I'm sure there are tons more, but I only made it to page 2 of my bookmarks before getting hit with a black page with 'Retry later' in the upper left corner (plus I kept getting distracted by the multitude of bookmarks that I discovered the dreaded 'This has been deleted, sorry!' note)

#anon ask #answered asks #author rec #ao3 recs #fic recs #i tried to tag everyone here on tumblr #if you know the authors that i didn't tag #pls let them know they were recced!

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spencer-sweets · 1 year ago

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Marvel Fic Recs | Peter Parker/Wade Wilson

so i have been a part of the spideypool fandom on and off since... 2019? some of these are really old and I might not remember details other than I thought it was great at the time - and when i started reading spideypool i didn't bookmark as liberally as i do today. got back into it after Deadpool and Wolverine (feel free to send me fics you think will get me more into that ship). How well these stand up against the test of time... can't be certain on all of them but at least they brought me joy the first or second time around.

let me explain by jilliancares Gen 8,505 Wade scoffs, shaking his head and elbowing Peter in the side. “Sure,” he says, sarcastic. “That’s why your spidey-sense doesn’t see me.” Peter’s on the verge of laughing, wanting to join Wade in his amusement, but he freezes. His entire body goes still. He finds himself staring at a roof three buildings over, not even looking at anything. Two blocks away, a car alarm finally shuts off. “I never told you that,” Peter says, the realization startling him. Or: Peter's starting to realize just how much Wade knows about him.

this was cute and fluffy.

I'm Something of a Scientist Myself by fancastical Explicit 11,422 Wade decides to start dousing himself in various synthetic spider sex pheromones before meeting up with Spidey, because why wouldn't he? They have some… interesting results. Wade feels downright scientific.

its smut but wacky. as i noted in my bookmark (very rare of me) "Fucking awesome and I dont usually bookmark pure smut... However there was so much effort put into this one it is definitely going down in history."

Freefall by Wilt Explicit 37,557 It's been a long time since Peter took off his mask in front of someone he loved, cracked a nervous smile and said, “This is me”. He swore to himself he'd never do it again, and he's been making a good run of it by spending more time as Spiderman than Peter Parker for the past few years. But for some reason, being Spiderman also means spending a lot of time around Deadpool. And, like clockwork, that same old turmoil comes creeping back again.

i bookmarked this in April of 22' (gonna re-read it and i'll update this). its got mutual pining and an identity reveal tho so its kind of hard to fuck that up.

Allostasis by ruralfishingcat Mature 42,434 Peter had a tendency to put up walls to isolate himself; even as Spider-Man, he could only suffer through so much death and destruction. It was precautionary, really, and those he'd pushed away would thank him were they aware of the circumstances. Of course, Deadpool had his own tendencies, one of which was to break down said walls (fourth ones included). As grating as it was, a small sliver of Peter hoped the mercenary would be able to succeed.

no memory of this but i bookmarked it back in 2022 and i didn't bookmark much back then.

fall out, boy, so i can fall in(to you) by TheMadKatter13 Explicit 81,041 Deadpool keeps having sex with Peter and Peter… Peter keeps letting him.

smut... pure smut.. with a side of plot and pining

we're on a highway to hell (with a little bit of heaven) by dabblingwithwords Mature (I would say Explicit) 107,557 Hydra has had Peter in their custody for three years. Deadpool is hired to break him out. Throw in an alien symbiote, motels, and superhero explosions and things get gay.

I don't remember a lot of the details of this fic but it is THE spideypool fic for me. this fic stuck with me for so long. i read it when i first got into spideypool - then the second time around - and i might read it again it was that good.

Dissonance by stuckybarnes Mature 121,395 Wherein Deadpool is reluctantly hired to protect Peter Parker from an organization out to hunt him, with varying success on both ends and quite a lot of feelings, revelations, and identity crises.

i recently re-read this and its fun. its a bodyguard fic with spideypool and secret identities.

Dead Men Walking (series) by doctorestranged Explicit 235,937 When a series of murders take place, Peter Parker goes undercover in Sister Margaret’s to get intel on Tony Stark’s prime suspect: Deadpool. Peter goes in hoping to get enough information so that Spider-Man can save the day, but like everything in Peter’s life, it becomes a bit more complicated than that and it soon becomes apparent that he might not be the best fit for the job.

I remember very little about this series other than this made me spend a week hyperfixating on book binding because i was willing to kill to get my hands on a physical copy of this.

The Amazing Deadpool by harrytiptoe Mature 481,270 Basically a rewrite of the first Deadpool movie mixed with The Amazing Spider-Man movies (AKA what if they were the love interest in each other’s movies). What if Wade had changed his plan and Peter had been the one delivering pizza to Jeremy the stalker.

hear me out on this one - it set pre-deadpool and during the amazing spider-man. its a self indulgent fic for those who wanted to see more of mercenary wade wilson who threatens the pizza guy and more gayness from tasm. the sequel does go into deadpool 1 but it hasn't been finished yet. this is an epic length fic that i have finished twice and started over again i love it that much but its definitely not for everyone. its got a weird age gap with peter being 18 and not out of high school and i know some people don't like wade with no scars. don't come at me lol.

thats all for now folks.. will probably update this in the future

originally posted: 8/13/2024

#marvel #spideypool #spider man/deadpool #peter parker/wade wilson #fic rec #peter parker #spiderman #deadpool #wade wilson

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cooking-with-hailstones · 1 year ago

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The Legend of Zelda: stats of the kingdom

A Statistical Analysis of Popular Fanfiction in the Legend of Zelda Fandom on AO3

I like numbers and stats and for some unfathomable reason I find it calming. So over the past couple weeks, I’ve been making this spreadsheet!

DISCLAIMER: This is not a judgement of the quality, value, or merits of any of the fics on this list. It's just me being curious about what's popular with the Legend of Zelda fandom on AO3.

Feel free to go explore the spreadsheet. My own observations and analysis under the cut.

TL:DR, Link has a lot of kinky sex. Sidlink and Zelink are vying for who’s the most popular ship. Also, this fandom has a shit ton of sub categories that are truly islands unto themselves and have their own conventions.

Methodology: I'm including all fics from the first page of AO3 results (20 fics per page) sorted by:

Hits

Kudos

Comments

Bookmarks

Anything tagged under the Legend of Zelda and Related Fandoms tag that was in the top 20 most hits, kudos, comments, or bookmarks made it into the spreadsheet. This ended up including 51 fics in total.

I put all the fics into one single spreadsheet in order to compare the differences between fics that are really high on the kudos count but not the hit count, or what has a lot of comments but fewer hits. Basically, I'm throwing a lot of things together to observe what gets engagement and looking at patterns that emerge!

Popular fandom subcategories:

Botw (41 fics tagged as such)

Linked Universe (9, including one mostly set in the world of BOTW)

OoT (2)

(I do wonder what it would be like to run these numbers on other fanfic sites, given the popularity boom of ao3 over the last 15 years or so. But also, Botw was an insanely popular game even by Zelda standards, so… who knows?)

Tags:

Character tags: Obviously, Link was by far the most popular character, but here are the characters that had a minimum of 3 appearances per category. Yay champions!

Zelda

Sidon

Mipha

Urbosa

Revali

Daruk

Story tags: Again, just going by sheer numbers, here are the story tags that appeared at least 3 times in every category:

Slowburn

AU – canon divergence

With honorable mentions to fluff, angst, double penetration, anal sex, amnesia/memory loss, and mute or selectively mute Link, who all cracked above 3 instances in 2 separate categories.

Relationships:

This was a tight race, but shoutout to Sidlink for eking out the win for the most highly rated ship in the Zelda fandom with 13 fics qualifying in my ranking. Zelink is close behind at 10 fics. (That being said, Zelink takes it by volume: 7,797 fics tagged as Zelink vs Sidlink’s 2,193)

Other popular ships:

Revalink (8) (this one surprised me! I didn’t realize my beloved birb was so popular)

Miphlink (3)

Link/Monsters (2)

Sidon/Reader (2)

Ganzelink, Ganlink, Malink, Miphzelink, and Miphzel all made single appearances.

(Pls don’t start ship war discourse in the notes kthanx)

All right, let’s deep dive into the numbers!

Fics in all 4 categories:

Interim - starkraving

Sands of time -tirsynni

Congrats you are officially the most popular Loz fics across all of ao3! at least according to my particular scope of analysis.

Fics in 3 categories:

Displaced - socksock

Drown In Me - bacchanalia

Alone We Fight - SilvermistAnimeLover

Blood Moon Rising - MarquesGillette

Popular authors (people who show up more than once in multiple categories sorry comments georg)

MarquesGillette

MaryDragon

SilvermistAnimeLover

ObakeAri

Hits:

Top 5 most popular fics by hit count:

Displaced - socksock

Interim - starkraving

To Save Hyrule - orphan_account

Sands of time - tirsynni

Drown In Me - bacchanalia

First page by hits:

Min: 117,917 – Sidon’s Epic Pining Adventure (ObakeAri)

Max: 189,622 – Displaced (socksock)

Average: 145,385

Average wordcount for fics with the most hits:

140,909

Kudos:

Top 5 most popular fics by kudos count:

Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy - Icka M Chif

Interim - starkraving

To My Dearest Friend - surveycorpsjean

26 Minutes and 42 Seconds - T_5Seconds

Blood Moon Rising - MarquesGillette

First page by kudos:

Min: 4917 – Finding Link (Umbreonix)

Max: 10321 – Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy (Icka M Chif)

Average: 6981

Average wordcount for fics with the most kudos:

41,136

Comments:

Top 5 most popular fics by comment count:

Carlos from MarvelandZeldaFan's Children of the Heroes - KR5

This is an Adjuration - notfreyja

My Art - KR5

Sidon's Epic Pining Adventure - ObakeAri

Priestess of War - KR5

Woohoo! You all get to meet KR5 aka Comments Georg. Comments Georg has long conversations and RPs in the comments of their ao3 posts, which are usually fanart. TO BE CLEAR, THIS IS TOTALLY FINE AND COOL! I think it’s quite delightful! However, it does completely bork my ranking system because outside of comments, these posts do not have a lot of engagement (like, less than 100 hits and less than 20 kudos) and I don’t think they count towards my analysis of “what is popular in the Zelda fandom writ large”. But they qualified based on my criteria. Which I think speaks to the weakness of my criteria more than anything else tbh…

Anyways, shoutout to Comments Georg for truly showing off what it means to be a statistical outlier.

First page by comments:

Min: 1568 – The Quiet River Rages (MaryDragon)

Max: 43808 - Carlos from MarvelandZeldaFan's Children of the Heroes (KR5)

Average: 4131 (which goes down to 2042 if we exclude KR5’s impressive max, which is a full order of magnitude more than notfreyja in second place with 3470 comments. Very much demonstrating the power of a statistical outlier!)

Average wordcount for fics with the most comments:

275,593

Bookmarks:

Top 5 most popular fics by bookmarks count:

Interim - starkraving

Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy - Icka M Chif

Sands of time - tirsynni

To My Dearest Friend - surveycorpsjean

Alone We Fight - SilvermistAnimeLover

First page by bookmarks:

Min: 973 – Expatriate (thehoyden)

Max: 2984 – Interim (starkraving)

Average: 1468

Average wordcount for fics with the most bookmarks:

70,027

Fic Ratings:

G: 3 (literally all fanart from KR5)

T: 22

M: 8

E: 17

Unrated: 1

Observations:

I ran this twice. Once including crossovers, and once excluding crossovers. This filtered out a lot of large drabbles and things like “flash fiction fuckings” which, no judgment, you do you, they just weren’t super relevant for what I was looking for. If you wanna see these stats including all the multifandom stuff that shows up, here’s the link for that:

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1DXDKXutIzVC-Iac93fFSDohAkphrn67yV-DmRt9xXmU/edit?usp=sharing

(I’m going to break academic professional analysis here and get on my soapbox for a sec – please don’t post big multifandom one shots where you tag like 20 different fandoms and every single kink that gets written about across 103 different chapters. This is literally what series are for. These kinds of things just clog up the tags, and it also makes it harder for people to find the things you’ve written that they want to read! I know this was a convention on ff.net, but this is not ff.net! We can make authors' lives and readers' lives easier!)

There were 38,427 fics in the tag “Legend of Zelda and Related Fandoms” (including crossovers, that goes up to 41,634). I manually added one back in though because it was entirely a botw story, just loosely inspired by another game.

Linked Universe fans comment a LOT. Strong correlation between high comment and Linked Universe fandom subsection. Y’all are very involved and active, and you show support to your authors. I salute you!

Sidlinkers, y'all are horny and I respect it.

Zelinkers, dear god we do love a slowburn.

All the most highly kudos’d fics are very low in the comment count. It’s almost an inverse correlation.

Excluding crossovers increased the correlation between hits and kudos quite dramatically.

There were not very many au’s other than canon divergence. Only one modern au as far as I could tell from a cursory examination of tags.

Lots more clustering, far less disparity between min and max numbers than when I ran this with A:TLA numbers.

Far less consensus on a vibe. Way fewer big writers, but lots of little writers doing their own thing.

Truly a lot of E fics. We are horny bastards.

We need more stuff written for games other than BOTW!!

There aren’t as many fics that are like “oh everyone in the fandom has read these fics”. There are probably those fics in each subcategory of the fandom, or within the specific ships, but there aren’t as many general fics that have entire fandom-wide appeal.

Thank you for reading! This was a lot of fun, and I hope you found it interesting. Shoutout to the Hateno Hangout discord for helping me refine this mess :P

Further shoutout to my partner who helped with writing some SQL to help with tag analysis. Truly partner of the year.

If you want more of this kind of egregious nerdiness, I did this with the top fics in the A:TLA fandom a couple weeks ago: https://www.tumblr.com/cooking-with-hailstones/751749202663669760/statistical-analysis-of-the-most-popular-atla

#the legend of zelda #legend of zelda #tloz #loz #ao3 #archive of our own #fandom analysis #fandom stats #zelda stats #linked universe #sidlink #zelink #zelda #link #sidon #stats analysis #stats of the kingdom #statistical analysis

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midnight-black2 · 1 year ago

Note

im really okay with this being published on may. since its farleigh start related. but...

shy and nerdy dom!reader and farleigh start in oxford. where farleigh takes an interest on reader since they look absolutely innocent and cute. so he tries his hardest to get her in bed with him. which bites him on the ass bcos reader is a dom LMAO really caring tho. which kinda pulls on farleigh's heartstrings a bit 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 yk "youre the only person to do this for me" kind of trope but after hard core sex (im kidding... unless)

𝐌𝐄𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓

pairing : farleigh start x reader

synopsis : read the req !!

disclaimers : sub!farleigh, dom!reader, smut with plot, fem!reader, kind of like degrading praise, p in v (imaginary condom, let's just pretend they had one bc i forgot to write it in), handjob (m!recieving), etc

note : since i waited so long to post this, i wanted to make it worth the while. enjoy 🫶🫶

for a college girl, her behavior was...curious, to say the least. she was oddly quiet; stuck to herself mostly. she had a few friends, if you could really call them that. for the most part, she was nowhere to be found, and that's exactly how she preferred it.

you couldn't find her at parties, or outings, or pubs. if you really wanted to speak with her, you would have to go to the very back of the library, where she would be sat at a desk, reading some book or doing homework. it didn't matter, though. the main reason people wanted to meet with her was a matter of tutoring, and most people at oxford didn't necessarily need tutoring.

for the most part, she was unbothered. until, farleigh start walked into her life. polar opposites, they were. when he had asked a counselor who the best person to tutor him would be, they had guided him to Y/N. and so, on a thursday evening, (7:43 pm to be exact), farleigh found you in the back of the school library, reading as you ate an apple as quietly as possible as not to disturb others.

he stopped in his tracks when he saw you. your hair pulled back into a low bun, a few strands sticking out. you pushed your glasses up the bridge of your nose as your eyes chased the words on the book pages violently quick. he furrowed his brows, with a confused grin. he didn't expect you to be so cute.

"are you...Y/N L/N?" he queried. you were seemingly startled, which made him chuckle to himself. your face twisted into an expression of utter bewilderment.

"yes...why do you ask?" you question, reluctantly.

"i was told to come see you..." he said, in a daze. after a few seconds of silence (and more confusion on your face) he broke from his reveries, and cleared his throat. he smiled, glanced at the ground, before his eyes trailed back up to yours. "i need tutoring."

you nodded, and slipped a bookmark in your book, before pushing it to the side. you took one last bite from your apple, before sitting up, walking to the trash, and throwing it away. once you sat back down, you tucked the unruly strands of hair behind your ears, before patting the empty seat to the right of you.

"do sit," you instructed, face calm and emotionless. and so, he sat beside you, his bright and rather bold choice of clothing almost looking ridiculous next to your dull browns and blacks. the juxtaposition was comical. "so is there particular homework you need help with? or would you simply like me to look through work you don't understand or...?" he smiled amiably, before nodding.

"i need help with some math homework," he replied, before digging through his backpack. you waited patiently, before he eventually set down two packets of homework on the table. you mentally sighed. you didn't quite feel up for the task, but he seemed nice, and you didn't want to let him down either.

"specific questions? or the whole thing?" you asked.

"the whole thing." okay so maybe he was fibbing. maybe he only said the whole packet so he could spend more time with you. so? so what? it's not like a little white lie ever hurt anyone. you took the first packet, and flipped through it. to your advantage, it looked fairly easy.

you began to explain the first problem, but he was hardly listening. you were solving it completely on your own, and whenever you would ask if he understood, he would form some distant "mhm" as a way of saying yes. you realized at some point, though. you realized this entire time (five minutes and twenty-eight seconds in fact--you had been watching the clock out of your peripheral) he wasn't looking at the paper, but you. you slowly turned to face him, and your cheeks became a rosy red, only slightly noticeable, but there.

"are you alright?" you asked, swallowing dryly. he nodded.

"yeah, sorry, you're just...you're so pretty. has anyone ever told you that?" he answered, gazing at you.

"uhm, no, not that i can remember," you said back. he laughed at that. he found you endearing, even charming, in your own unconventional way.

soon enough, one hour and fifty-eight minutes had passed (again, you had been glancing at the clock every now and then) and you finally made it through both math packets. you two began cleaning up, and packing your things.

"just so you know, i won't charge you this time, but any further sessions will be twenty dollars by the hour," you stated, matter-of-factly, as you placed your things inside your bag.

"wow, and here i was thinking you were doing this out of the kindness of your heart," he said, playfully. you smiled. it was a small one, but you still smiled.

"nope. everything i do has a catch," you said, matching his tone. and boy did he wish he would've remembered that...

after that, you two kept meeting. it wasn't intentional, but the world always seemed to place you two in the same spot at the same time. the interactions didn't differ from that of the one in the library. he was always flattering you, or finding a way to make you blush, and he found you incredibly cute. so much so, that he was determined to discover you. in other words--he wanted you under his bedsheets. so when one of your acquaintances, luna, had practically dragged you to some frat party saying it would "be good for you to get out," you weren't surprised to see him there.

he always seemed to creep up on you. you had turned around and were met with him, towering over you with that same complacent grin he always wore.

"is this real life? am i actually seeing Y/N L/N at a frat party? oh god, pinch me," he said, in a dramatic high-pitched voice. he described it as if it were a crime, and it was almost like it was. you smiled, and shook your head.

"yes, i'm actually here, though against my will," you responded, crossing your arms over your chest as you glanced at your friend who had found oxfords heartthrob, felix, and occupied herself with him. farleigh chuckled, as he kept his eyes trained on you.

"you look good, Y/N," he said, and, he was right, you did look good. your hair was--for once--out of its usual bun and falling down your shoulders gracefully. you had on a bit of eyeliner, and some lipstick which was the most makeup you'd worn all year. you were wearing a short long sleeved black dress. it was casual, but it looked so strikingly gorgeous on you. farleigh ran his eyes along your body, he certainly wasn't subtle, although he never has been.

"you make it quite clear," you said, with a brow quirk, as you swallowed. his eyes met yours again, a smirk forming on his face.

"good," he replied. there it was, he always seemed to reply just as quick as you did, there was no thought or effort, he simply matched your wit. he was the first person you had met to do so. then again, you hadn't met many people at oxford, so perhaps the judgement wasn't very fair.

"don't your, er, a thousand girlfriends await you?" you teased, crossing your arms across your chest. he raised his brows dramatically, with a gasp. it was sarcastic, you knew that much. you laughed.

"sure, girl friends, space between the words," he corrected, sassily.

"well excuse me then."

"yes, excuse you," he said back, tilting his head to the side. you smiled, before you caught luna chugging down alcohol you were pretty sure was either spiked, or someone else's.

"no literally, excuse me. i think my friend over there needs a bit of assistance. jesus, not even ten minutes here and she's already getting trashed," you said. he looked behind him, and saw luna stumbling and screaming. he laughed, and let you go.

after the whole luna situation was taken care of, you were pooped. which sucked, because surprisingly, in the ten minutes you had been talking with farleigh, you were enjoying yourself immensely. a lot people had cleared out, leaving the house more quiet than before. luna didn't want to leave quite yet, which was unfortunate for you since she was your ride here. luckily, though, you had planned for this and brought a book for entertainment. you just read the book as she flirted her way into guys lives. to your surprise, you heard an all too familiar voice speak from behind you.

"are you seriously reading a book at a party? you're such a dork," farleigh said, leaning over your shoulder.

"maybe i am. but it's more interesting than watching luna flirt with uncomfortable guys all night," you replied, flipping the page. he chuckled.

"fair," he began. "you know, i can think of more fun things to do, though." you placed the bookmark in your book, you were intrigued.

"yeah? like what?"

"you could come upstairs with me," he suggested, smirking. you cocked a brow.

"and do what, hm?"

"three guesses."

"talk, get drunk, or get high," you said, fully knowing none of those were correct answers.

"incorrect, Y/N. can't believe for the first time in the time i've know you, you got something wrong," he said, dramatically. you laughed. "i'm serious though, come upstairs with me." you didn't answer for a bit, how could you? you couldn't say no, but you shouldn't have said yes, either.

"please?" he begged, after you didn't say anything after a moment. you sighed, setting your book on the coffee table in front of you.

"you'd better make this worth my while, farleigh."

"i promise you i will, Y/N," he said, and you were sold. in a flash you two darted up the stairs and in a secluded room on the left wing of the house. you guys haphazardly made it inside the bedroom, making out feverishly. the air suddenly felt hot, and everything was so intense. from the way he cupped your face, to the way your hands rested on his hot skin. he was about to sit you down on the bed, attempting to exert some sort of control over you. you paused. oh no, no no no no no.

"what are you doing?" you asked, bluntly. maybe you read the situation incorrectly, but you definitely thought he was more on the submissive side. this was...an unexpected turn of events.

"is this...not what you had in mind?" he asked, stopping in his tracks. it's not like he would ever force you to do anything. still, he thought his feelings were more than mutual based off of the way you had practically lunged up the stairs with him. you snuck out underneath him, and for a second he was left dumbfounded. that was until you flipped positions, having him underneath you on the bed. his cheeks flushed, becoming a cute crimson color.

"this is what i had in mind," you replied, smirking. god, had he really been that dense? were you actually the top this entire time? did he really care? so many questions. frankly, he had never subbed before, and even though he didn't necessarily have to do anything for it (besides maybe let go of his pride), he was still nervous about it. after all, he would be a lot more vulnerable than usual. "i know this probably isn't your normal style, and if you're not willing to try it we can stop right now."

"when did i say i wanted to stop?"

"you didn't."

"so...proceed," he said, a bit hesitantly. you smiled, before you kissed his lips softly. it felt heavenly; the way your lips moved in sync. you treated him with care. it made his heart flutter in his chest.

eventually, you moved away from his lips and began trailing kisses down his jaw and to his neck. you sucked softly, leaving hickeys all over his smooth skin. he sighed at the feeling, biting back any and every urge to let out the soft whimpers he wanted to. your hand found its way to the zipper of his jeans, before you looked up into his eyes.

"do you want this?" you asked, only for good measure. you wanted to be sure.

"yes, fuck, obviously," he panted, with a sassy eye roll. you chuckled, before continuing. you carefully unzipped his pants. he helped you in the process, lifting his hips up so you could pull them down. he couldn't fully comprehend what was happening as your fingers traced around his prominent erection. his mind felt clouded and hazy. he had never been in this position before, but now that he was, he didn't think he'd ever want to do things a different way.

you palmed him through his draws, and he genuinely whined at the sensation. you were teasing him, and he hated it. you arched a brow, before going back up to kiss him on the lips.

"be patient, farleigh," you advised, before pecking him on the lips one last time. painfully slowly, you pulled his draws down, and his cock sprang up swiftly. goodness was he big. perhaps 9 to 9.5 inches. if you planned to properly fuck him, he would possibly split you open...i mean what the hell.

"like what you see?" he teased, breathlessly. you rolled your eyes, yet didn't respond. you simply thumbed at his tip (which was leaking pre), and that was enough to shut him up. you--finally--gave him what he so desperately wanted, and wrapped your hand around his cock. you started out steadily, up and down. he let out soft whimpers and whines as you did so. he threw his head back, his brows were beautifully furrowed.

your hand went for the hem of his sweater, and you pulled it over his head. he was now fully exposed, and he would have felt slightly embarrassed if he wasn't so fucked out already. your fingers accidentally grazed his nipples, and combined with the stimulation already given, he let out a loud moan. you kissed his cheek, with a smile.

"look at you enjoying yourself, hm?" you mumbled.

"oh shut the fuck up," he countered, breathlessly. you pumped him particularly rough when he said that, causing him to whine. "a-ah fuck." he felt himself growing nearer and nearer towards the edge, which was strange. normally, he would last longer, but there was something about you that made him want to absolutely make a mess of himself.

"s-shit Y/N, think m'gonna cum," farleigh warned, squeezing the sheets tight in his hand. and then? you halted.

"no no, why'd you stop?" he whined, shaking his head. you laughed in his face, and didn't respond. although, when you sat up, and he did the same and leaned against the headboard, he knew what was happening. you took off your pants and then your underwear followed. he couldn't help but look down, you were completely soaked. he swallowed anxiously. he didn't want to wait much longer.

"see that? you see what you do to me?" you asked, tauntingly. you definitely had a knack for making things known to him, and he went absolutely feral. he was growing more and more impatient.

"please, Y/N," he begged, gripping your waist in an attempt to ground himself. you wasted no more time, as you lifted yourself up, and then sat back down on his cock. your pace was pretty fast, merciless, even. he let out a guttural moan, and there was a slight arch in his back as he tried helplessly not to buck his hips upward. you groaned, he was so fucking big.

"you like that, farleigh? like me fucking you like this?" you asked. it was rhetorical, but he nodded eagerly anyways. you were quite animalistic, and he wasn't sure how you were able to fuck him so fast, but it felt euphoric. he cried out, as he shut his eyes.

"o-oh my god, fuck," he moaned. you placed your hands against his chest to leverage yourself. you wanted to go even faster, thought it seemed impossible. "i won't last long."

"fuckk," you groaned, brows furrowed. "you're good, it's fine. you're doing just fine f'me, farleigh." he could feel himself become undone, as you did too.

"w-wanna cum. can i?" he asked, pleading with you. his eyes were slightly teary.

"come whenever," you breathed out, not really caring at this point. you were simply chasing your own climax. soon enough, farleigh came with a frail cry, and shortly after you came too. your chests were heaving up and down, lungs working overtime to catch your breaths. your bodies were sweaty and sticky against each other, but neither of you cared. as he came down from his high, he couldn't help but feel special. that was his first time doing something like that. there was a long, comfortable silence, before farleigh spoke.

"nobody's ever done anything like that for me before," he said, looking up at you. you smiled softly.

"glad to be the first one then." let's just say, that it turned out to be more than a one time thing...

𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 © 𝐤𝐲𝐚-𝐢𝐬-𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐥

𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐲? 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞

#dom!reader #smut #smut with plot #farleigh start #dom reader #archie madekwe #saltburn #farleigh smut #farleigh x reader #sub!character #sub!farleigh

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freeluigihesbae · 7 months ago

Text

an announcement

i saw this fic bookmarked under an author's page. i had just read and commented under a fic of theirs and out of curiosity, i scrolled through their bookmarks to see this. i clicked to read to convince myself it wasn't what i thought it was, but unfortunately, it was.

there are certain things we can write, the extreme being smut between two people who can be entirely unrelated. step-sibling smut is probably the most we can push boundaries because some people aren't comfortable but the lack of blood relation is what makes it acceptable. i might not write it myself but i'm find with seeing it.

i clicked on this fic and i skimmed words in the first few sentences and i instantly closed my page. it was so disgusting. it was exactly what you're thinking (and frankly what the tags say it is). smut. about two brother who MIND YOU went through heavy sexual assault because of their parents. this goes beyond dead dove and fucked up.

what's worse are the comments. there are people cheering this fic on calling the portrayals of lyle and erik to be "hot" and "sexy." hell if these people were fantasizing about the brother individually fucking themselves, i wouldn't care. instead, these are comments people are making about a fictional setting in which both brothers are fucking each other?

it's disgusting to make sibling incest and even more deplorable when you make it about two brother who were destroyed by their parents and especially their father. i am so so so disappointed. i am so disappointed we are taking pleasure in things that are so screwed up and fucked up.

i commented earlier on a post @luigis-wetdream i believe had either made or re-blogged which i responded to talking about underage boys/children were being thirsted over. it's relevant here because erik is portrayed to be 15 in this fic but grows older and i just cannot. i cannot fathom or understand this in any capacity.

this fic has 106 comments and i can't help but wish hell upon every single one of the people who enjoyed it and further encouraged the author to continue. it's worth noting the author made themselves anonymous, obviously because they knew what the fuck they were writing was deplorable and absolutely criminal.

i have been an advocate for the menendez brothers starting halfway through 2024 and after understanding the facts of their case, i had a very clear view about documentaries that were made to profit from their case. a great example is the monsters show made about them - nic chavez and cooper koch were actors however the brothers were sadly portrayed in ways they should NOT have been during the course of the show.

what i want to highlight are the several problematic angles that come to light when you read the fic's tags. i was desperate to be proven wrong when i clicked on it but i closed my tab instantly. this is so disgusting and if you are one of the people quietly enjoying these things, you are a part of the problem and reason why some people still don't support the brothers.

it's not just about the fact they may have splurged after killing their parents, but some people believe they had sexual proclivities with each other which is further propagated by shit like this fic. 11 chapters? 1 chapter is bad enough but how do you come up with this much disgusting, vomit-inducing filth about those poor brothers?

i do not expect to speak much about them on this account because it's mainly for luigi and fics i'm writing for him but i just had to give a very strong warning for anyone who takes fics like these lightly, excusing it by saying "it's just fiction."

if it's just fiction, it should tell you about what this person and the people commenting accept. life is not a fucking fantasy. these are the same people who would gag if they saw two siblings make-out in front of them.

or maybe they wouldn't. i don't know. this made me feel so disgusting i wanted to throw my computer across the room.

there was a parent/child incest tag and i didn't know what to do other than write my feelings out.

with that being said, i want to conclude by saying that i FULLY support the menendez brother and believe they should be freed. my heart aches for them and even though i might not talk about them on my own volition, feel free to leave comments or messages/inbox requests and i'm happy to discuss my thoughts about them, their case, or any other related items.

i felt it was important to highlight that people like this exist. just remember this person made themselves anonymous.

don't be the kind of person who has to hide because you're killing your conscience to indulge in something that feeds extremely sick and fucked up desires.

tagging the smut tags for both actors because this is extremely important for those readers to know about this.

thank you all. please continue to support the brothers. educate yourself on their case if you aren't adequately up to date.

#menendez brothers #erik menendez #lyle menendez #freelylemenendez #freeerikmenendez #free the menendez brothers #justiceforerik #justiceforlyle #justiceforerikandlyle #erik and lyle menendez #monsters #erikandlylemenendez #the menendez brothers #monsters: the lyle and erik menendez story #nicholas alexander chavez smut #cooper koch #nicholas alexander chavez #cooper koch smut #angelluigiposts

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banannabethchase · 10 months ago

Text

Lost the Reflex to Resist - also on AO3

Matt and Adam have the rings, Mox has a question, Adam has a story, and they all have a whole lot of interest in each other still.

An epilogue and prologue in one. Thank you to all who have read along with me as I created this weird story. Current canon is HILARIOUSLY off base with this now, but this is set pre-Blood and Guts, so, perhaps, I can hold on to that. Title from I Could Get Used to This by The Veronicas.

Adam curses and pauses to unhook his hair from the ring. “Damn thing,” he mutters.

“Why do you keep complaining?” Matt asks. It’s infuriating how calm and collected he sounds, running near full speed on the treadmill. His cheeks are red and his skin has a sheen of sweat, but he looks thoroughly unbothered as he runs. “You’re the one who demanded we adjust the setting.”

“I didn’t demand it!” Adam says. “I – requested it.” He hadn’t realized that tightening some of the metal around one of the gems would cause the little prongs to poke up the tiniest bit. It’s happened weekly for the past few months. Now he’s training for Blood and Guts, and Matt has to be all mean to him on camera, and, to top it all off, his hair has been ripped out.

“You are being so embarrassing,” Matt says, grinning. “What, are you going to start pouting?”

Adam makes a mental note to ruin Matt to entirety once Dynamite is over.

There is something poetic about Adam not being the one actually pouting on a Dynamite day, but also having it not be Matt, either.

It takes a while before he recognizes the shadow, but after the third or fourth pass, it’s obvious. Mox looks uncharacteristically annoyed, almost Matt-like, once Adam gets a chance to see him after his brief vacation. He’s here on backstage work, helping to plan out future storylines and game plan Bryan’s retirement with him, but he keeps walking by the EVP locker room at least once an hour. He’ll glance in, turn away, and then look back before finally walking off. He then returns within the hour.

“What the hell is wrong with him?” Adam asks, halfway through a little braid behind Matt’s ear.

“Who?” Nick asks. He peers out, nearly throwing his notebook on the floor. Adam nudges it closer to the couch with his foot, careful not to dislodge the bookmark hastily shoved into place. “Who is it?”

“Oh my god, stop acting like Billy would do anything but walk up into the room and sweep you off your feet,” Matt says.

“There is no reason for you to be bitchy when you’re the one getting your hair braided.” Nick throws a middle finger up over his shoulder, and Matt huffs. “Seriously, who is being all weird about our – oh.”

Mox, midway through a pass, pauses in front of Nick, looking interesting. “Am I the weird whatever?”

“Yes,” Matt says, with surprising confidence. “Adam keeps seeing you walk by.”

“Maybe Adam’s watching me walk by,” Mox retorts.

Adam snickers. “Only possible if you were stalking us and too nervous to come say hi, but whatever.”

“I’ll see you at catering,” Mox says, almost too abruptly. He turns on his heel and leaves.

“Okay, now I’m even more confused,” Adam mutters. “Also, the braid is done.”

Matt looks up at him, beaming. “I’ll hide it during my promos and everything. But I want to keep it in.”

Adam manages to feel his heart backflip, even as Nick gags and pretends to throw up in the trash can.

They’re in the middle of a pre-Dynamite snack and a conversation when somebody drops down hard next to Matt and across from Adam at the table.

“Hey,” Mox says, taking an absurdly huge bite of an equally large apple. He crunches noisily, smiling around the mouthful. “What’s up?”

“Close your damn mouth,” Adam says, throwing a napkin at him. All he has left is his Diet Coke, and he takes a sip as he waits for Mox to explain himself. He’ll talk eventually.

“So,” Mox says. He lounges. It feels a little…much. Like an act. “I hear the two of you are engaged.”

“Yeah?” Adam asks. “Who told you?”

“Because we know it wasn’t social media,” Matt says. It’s impressive how he can even take a sip from his water with attitude.

Mox shrugs. “A little birdie let me know.”

Adam nods, swallowing his soda. “You here to say congratulations?”

“Sort of.” Mox adjusts in his seat. “Can I, um. Can I see the rings?”

Adam and Matt stick their hands out, and Mox seems to stare like he’s not sure what he’s supposed to be looking for. Adam gets it. He wasn’t sure either until he checked in with Ruby and Willow. “Sparkly,” he says, nodding. He looks up. “Very cool.”

“You’re acting weird,” Matt says, popping a grape into his mouth. “I mean, you’re always weird, but this is different weird. Weird weird.”

Mox’s face turns into some bizarre facsimile of a smile. There’s a pause. More of a pause. “Does this mean we can’t fuck anymore?” Mox blurts out.

Adam pauses, focusing very hard on not choking on his soda. “Dude?!”

“Sorry,” Mox says, and he lowers his voice into a whisper, like that’s the only issue. “Do those two rings mean I can’t fuck you two anymore?”

Matt blushes furiously and covers his face with his hands, and Adam takes a few breaths to keep from exploding.

“The volume wasn’t the problem,” he hisses, with teeth gritted. “It was the content.”

It’s the wrong thing to say.

Mox’s grin goes sharklike, and Adam immediately regrets calling Mox out.

“Don’t –”

“What, you don’t want people to know you share your – well, I guess he’s your fiancée now, isn’t he.” His grin grows wider as Adam feels at least a few eyes settling on their conversation.

“Mox,” Matt says quietly.

Mox shuts up immediately when he gets a look at Matt’s face. “Shit. Sorry, man. Didn’t mean to overstep.”

“I’m not the one you should apologize to,” Matt says. He nods at Adam. “He’s the one who didn’t like that.”

Mox is almost sheepish as he smiles over at Adam. “Sorry, man,” he says, and it’s almost like he’s trying to whisper but isn’t sure how to.

“You’re good,” Adam says, and he takes a long sip of his soda. May as well make Mox sit in it. “Weird way to start a conversation though.”

Matt snorts.

“What are you laughing about?” Adam asks.

“Better than starting the first ever conversation with somebody by insisting they’re their brother.”

Adam groans. “I thought we were over that.”

“Oh, Nick is,” Matt says. “I think it’s funny. I’m going to make fun of you for it probably forever.” He studies Adam’s face, smiles, then looks down at his ring. “Definitely forever.”

“What?” Mox asks. He turns to Adam. “The fuck did you do?”

Adam drops his face in his hands, groaning. “Please don’t.”

“I won’t!” Mox says, and when Adam looks up, his hands are up in surrender. “Just. Sounds like a good story, is all.”

Matt snickers. “It’s a great story. Adam, if you won’t tell it, can I?”

“In private,” Adam insists. “I can tell from the Axe smell that one of the Gunns is lurking over my shoulder.”

“Goddamnit,” Austin grumbles.

“I told you to stop wearing that stupid body spray!” Colten punctuates it with something that sounds like a slap.

“I can do in private,” Mox says. “You two want to get breakfast tomorrow?” He pauses, eyes narrowing. “Though I’m getting the idea that this won’t be a breakfast appropriate conversation.”

“What in the eff is a breakfast appropriate conversation?”

Mox licks his lips as he looks at Matt. “Talking about what I’d like to do to you the next time the three of us are alone.”

Matt, surprisingly, sighs. “Keep it in your pants, Jonathan.” He stands. “I need to go check in on the sign in sheet, make sure nobody was held up by any weather at the airport.” He walks away with a confidence Adam is a little bit worried about.

“You asked him to marry you and now he’s got then nerve to talk back,” Mox says, leaning back in his seat.

“Technically, he asked me to marry him first.”

Adam’s yawning, half asleep from highly disrupted intended 8 hours of sleep because Matt saw a new position he liked mulling around online, when they sit down at the booth in the diner.

They’re midway through cups of coffee when Mox sits down, grinning. “Sorry about being weird yesterday,” and he doesn’t look sorry at all. “Got a tendency to look like a fuckin’ weirdo when I’m horny.”

“Please,” Matt says, rolling his eyes. “That was nothing.”

“I don’t know,” Adam muses. “That was pretty weird.”

Matt rolls his eyes. “Mox, I need you to know how much Adam effed up the first time we met.”

“Can’t have been that bad,” Mox says, nodding to the two of them. “Seems to have ended okay.”

“He mixed up me and Nick and insisted he hadn’t met me.”

Mox blinks. “Damn.”

“Shut up,” Adam grumbles. “I was, like, mid-twenties and confused and stressed. Leave me alone.” He’d hoped it would be at least a few minutes before he got called out. Half of him had hoped that Mox had forgotten.

“Don’t think I will.” Mox grins as he steals a home fry from Adam’s plate. “Talk.”

“No!” Adam says. He looks at Matt. “Matt, make him stop.”

“Ooh, I like this!” Matt says, and it’s really unfair how excited he seems. “Adam, tell Mox.”

“I don’t want to!”

Matt levels him with – they’re not boo boo eyes, exactly. There’s something a little more persuasive in them, something that actually half makes Adam want to do it. Just to see where those eyes go. “Please?” he asks. “I like hearing your version of how we met.” And there go the true boo boo eyes.

Adam sighs. “Goddamnit,” he grumbles. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll talk.”

~~~

He hangs up the phone, wondering if he just got himself fired. He’ll make up the NCI training another weekend. He has two weeks before his training expires. Principal Carver is probably just stressed out. It’ll be okay.

He walks up to the door, trying to look more confident and assured than he feels. “Hey, man,” he says, nodding.

The security guard, who can’t be much older than Adam himself but is about two times his size, looks him up and down. “Entrance is around front.”

“Yeah, I know,” Adam says, frowning. “But I just came out of this door.”

“Why?” the guy asks. He’s frowning harder than Adam is. “Kid, if you want to come to the show, buy a ticket.”

Adam tries to steady his breathing. De-escalation. He’s good at this. “I’m in the show,” he says, as calmly as he can get it. “I’m competing in the wrestling show. Like, I’m on the card.”

The guy frowns. “The wrestlers don’t come out this way. Am I gonna have to call the cops?”

Adam panics. There’s no de-escalation when the other person is getting in the way of your paycheck like this. “No, I swear,” he says. “I have – look, I’m, my name. My ring name is Adam Page. I work here.”

The body guard, examining him with disdain, shakes his head. “Nice try, dude,” he says. “I haven’t heard of anybody named Adam Page in this company.”

Adam is running out of time.

“Hey, man, what’s the issue?”

Adam turns around to see one of the Young Bucks – Matt, he thinks – walking up to him.

“Oh, thank god,” he says. “Hi.”

“Hi.” Matt stares at him, and Adam thinks this may be the worst first impression ever. It’s not cold, exactly, outside, but Adam feels the panicked sweat cool on his skin as he waits for him to be let in. “Alright, where are you on the card?”

“Oh, right. First names. I’m Adam Page.” He sticks out his hand, but Matt doesn’t respond the way he expects.

“Yeah, I know who you are,” Matt says, frowning. “You already introduced yourself.”

“I did?” Adam stares. “No, I didn’t. I met your brother, though, Nick.”

Matt’s frown deepens. “No, you met me,” he says.

Nick walks up from behind Matt, and it’s only then that Adam realizes their eyes are different colors. And that he definitely only met Matt. “Are you messing with us?” Nick asks. “We look nothing alike.”

“You do look alike!” Adam says. “I – are you twins or something?”

“Oh, my god, do you think making fun of us is going to get you pushed?” Nick’s eyes are angry, and Adam is…scared.

“That – that is not what I’m doing!” He tries to keep his voice under control. He immediately fails. “I swear, I got you two mixed up. I’m not great with faces.” He tries not to wince at just how pathetic he sounds. “Please. Don’t get me fired.”

Nick’s blue eyes – he’ll never forget it, Nick is blue and Matt is brown – burn with fury, but Matt seems to have a little sympathy behind his. “You didn’t mean it, did you.”

Adam shakes his head so hard he whips himself in the fact with is hair. “I didn’t. I promise.”

Matt looks at Nick and stares. With a sigh, Nick looks at him for an uncomfortably long beat before rolling his eyes toward Adam. “God, I know, but it’s annoying.”

Adam wonders, briefly, if he missed a whisper or something, but it doesn’t seem like it. Nick turns back to him before he can wonder more. “Fine. We’re good. But if you do something like this again, I’m kicking your ass.”

Adam nods. “Yeah, I get that. You’re Nick, he’s Matt, and you two aren’t twins.”

Nick rolls his eyes and walks away, but Matt has the barest hint of a smile.

“Let him in, Garth,” he says, stepping aside. “He may be a bit of an idiot, but he’s with us.”

Adam wants to get that hint of a smile to something full blown, and, even more so, he wants it aimed at him. He wants it more than he’s wanted anything other than being a world champion.

He’s jobbing, of course, but it goes well and there’s some people who really like him and start chanting. Adam, Adam, Adam. It still takes a few beats for him to remember that he’s the Adam they’re cheering for. But it’s nice. Even when it’s only one or two people, it’s nice.

He’s watching the main event from behind the curtain when he hears footsteps behind him. “Kid,” calls the booker. “Get in here.”

Adam knows he knows this guy’s name, but it’s been a crazy night and he’s tired. “Is everything okay, sir?”

“Yeah, it’s fine,” the guy says, waving him off. “We got an idea for you. How’s Japan sound?”

“I – it sounds lovely?”

The guy looks at him with half a sympathetic smile, half something a little bit more condescending. “I’m tapping out of this conversation. Bucks?”

Adam freezes. “Bucks?”

Matt and Nick – brown and blue, he’ll never forget it – walk in. “Hey, man,” Matt says, looking far less icy than Nick does. “We got an idea.”

Twenty minutes later, with grunts of approval from the booker and careful explanation interjected with firm and mildly caustic clarifications from Nick, Adam is signing an agreement to try some dates over in Japan.

“We like you for Bullet Club,” Matt says. “You could be…” He trails off, and tilts his head to the side.

“Interesting,” Nick interjects. “And you could protect us.”

“From what?”

Matt’s lips quirk. “Well, in case we need somebody a little bit bigger to take on some of the people who are working against our interests.”

Adam thinks that, in any other situation, he’d mention it sounds like they’re hiring him to be a bit of a mercenary. But teaching doesn’t pay well, and Ring of Honor as it stands pays even worse.

“Yeah,” he says, signing with a flourish. “Yeah, I’m in.” The dates are mostly weekends, which will make it a lot harder to do that make up NCI training. He’ll be tired when he works.

It will be worth it.

When all the ink is dry, Adam stands and shoots his friendliest smiles at the others in the room. “Thank you. For this opportunity.” He clears his throat. “I, uh. I gotta shower. I’ll see y’all later?”

Matt’s eyes sparkle a little bit. “Yeah,” he says. “Okay.”

Adam’s in the locker room showers alone. He’s been killing time, meeting people, trying to wait for everyone to leave before he showers. He’s not nervous, exactly. But this many people gets him anxious, and he thinks he deserves a little more time before he has to be comfortable completely naked in front of strangers.

There’s another reason, though. He can’t fight the image of Matt’s face, smiling just a little bit at him, as he strokes his dick. He’s gotta make this quick. The venue’s probably closing soon. But this is his best way to keep his anxiety under control when he’s got to drive, and there’s a lot running through his veins right now that won’t let him relax.

He exhales, moving his hand more quickly, when the curtain rips open. His eyes fly open, and he moves his hand from his dick, but it’s too late. He’s pretty sure the writing’s on the wall.

But Matt, and it’s him, of course, is looking at him, eyes dragging up and down Adam’s body, lingering on his cock. And he licks his lips.

The adrenaline of the night must be really getting under his skin, because he grins at Matt until Matt looks at him. He’s still here. Neither of them have moved. Not really. “This why you asked me to join Bullet Club?” he asks. “You trying to get in on this, baby?”

Matt’s mouth drops into something akin to a pout and his cheeks flush. “I – that’s not why I asked,” he whispers.

“But you didn’t say you aren’t trying to get on this,” Adam says. “And you haven’t left.”

Matt exhales and it’s shaky. Adam wants to taste the hesitation and tension in the air. “I haven’t.” He swallows. “If I get in this shower, are you going to make fun of me?”

“Why would I make fun of you?” Adam asks. He hopes Matt can’t hear how hard his heart is hammering.

Matt shrugs. “Because maybe you think I’m Nick.”

Adam barks out a laugh before he can stop himself. “I definitely don’t think you’re Nick.” He pushes hair damp hair from his face so he can get a better look. “You have brown eyes. You make ‘em look all sad sometimes when you’re trying to look cute.”

“I do not!”

Adam raises an eyebrow. “You’re doing it right now. Like you think I don’t want you in the shower with me.”

Matt huffs, looks over his shoulder, peels off his shirt and sweatpants, and steps in. “Fine,” he says. “I’m here.”

Adam swallows. “You, um. You are.”

Matt’s expression shifts. “Yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?”

Adam has plenty of ideas. But there’s one last question he has to ask. “Is this a regular initiation to Bullet Club or something?”

Matt tilts his head to the side. “Do I look like the kind of guy who propositions someone for a business deal?”

Adam considers it briefly. “You know what? No. Not for a business deal, at least.”

“I – fine, okay. That’s fair.” Matt stands on his toes and leans in until Adam’s back hits the wall. His hands go up automatically, flat and damp against Matt’s warm back. His skin is even softer than it looks. His eyes are softer, kinder, and more playful than he’s ever seen in the ring or on television.

He swallows. He won’t let himself get too invested in this man. He’s not that stupid.

“Are you gonna kiss me?” he whispers. He hopes the answer is yes.

Matt pushes up a little farther, and their lips touch. It’s not electric like a shock. It’s more like the warmth of a light on in the kitchen when you get home, and Adam thinks he’s already in trouble. He shouldn’t be thinking about home while his arms are around a guy he just met.

He forgets how to think about anything when Matt slips his tongue into Adam’s mouth. Their dicks bump against each other, fleetingly, and Adam hears the most interesting little whimper that he catches in his mouth from Matt.

He pulls back and Matt slides his lips down the side of Adam’s neck, nipping lightly. “Jesus,” Adam mumbles. “Okay, yeah.” He slides his hands down and grabs two solid handfuls of that ass, something he definitely has looked at when he thought he wasn’t allowed to, and moans. “God – it’s fucking unfair that you look like this.”

Matt pulls back and beams. “I knew it!” he says, almost too gleeful. “I knew you were looking at me.”

“Inviting you into my shower didn’t give you the first hint?!”

Matt shrugs. “Lots of people want to eff me when they first see me naked.”

Adam blinks at him. “Sorry, did you just censor the word fuck?”

“We don’t swear,” Matt says. “Me or my brother, I mean.”

“It’s we’re that you’re bringing up your brother when we’re both naked.”

Matt shrugs. “If I give you a blow job, will you leave me alone about not cursing?”

Adam thinks that, if Matt gives him a blow job, he might straight up fall in love. But that is a terrible thing to say. “Probably not,” he says, but right now he’s grinning down at Matt who’s rolling his eyes and smiling up at him. So maybe that’s the right thing to say.

Matt’s mouth around him is beyond anything Adam could have imagined. There was definitely a part of him that assumed this was some sort of prank or way to get him in trouble. But Matt’s the one on his knees, making interested little sounds on the sides of the slurping noises. And Adam is willing to get embarrassed if it also gets him this.

“Jesus,” he murmurs. “I – can I?” He gingerly puts his hand on top of Matt’s head. He’s about to pull back when Matt’s hand whips up and grabs his, shoving his fingers into Matt’s hair.

Matt pulls back, grinning. “You can pull it, too, if you want,” Matt says. There’s a sparkle in his eyes that suggests that, maybe, he’s the one who wants it.

“Yeah, okay,” Adam breathes.

He doesn’t pull. Not very much. He doesn’t want to overstay his welcome or overstep. But he’s in his mid-twenties and he’s got a hair trigger on his best days, and this isn’t going to last.

“Matt,” he says. “Matt, okay, it’s been so long since – anything, and I –” He chokes out, moaning, as Matt literally swallows him down and Adam is gone. Absolutely gone.

He whimpers, half embarrassment and half overstimulation, and Matt pulls back. There’s a brief cough then a warm hand on Adam’s arm.

“I take it that was good?”

Adam opens his eyes to see Matt smiling at him, but there is the barest hint of hesitation in his eyes. “Baby,” Adam tests, and Matt straight up melts, “that was incredible. Can I – you?” He doesn’t think his brain is going to go back to normal for a while, but he reaches downward and Matt nods frantically.

“Oh, yes. Cool. So definitely yes.”

Adam grabs Matt by the hips and turns him, pressing him up against the wall. “Can I kiss you?”

Matt doesn’t answer, just throws his arms around Adam’s neck and pulls him in. Adam moans into Matt’s mouth and slides his hand down. The water makes it just slick enough to work as he strokes Matt’s dick. Matt pushes up against him and throws a leg around Adam’s waist. There’s no hesitation in the way he touches, the way he moves, the way he demands to have more of Adam.

Time washes away with the shower water and Adam can tell Matt is close by the way he turns his head and begins panting, his head thunking against the wall of the shower.

“Adam,” he whispers, coming all over Adam’s hand. and it’s the first time Adam Page has ever truly felt connected to this name.

~~~

“Wow,” Mox says, and it would sound impressed if he wasn’t in the middle of a yawn. “What a way to hit your first week of work, Cowboy.”

“Shut up,” Adam grumbles. It’s his fifth cup of coffee and his bones are starting to feel like they’re shattering from the insides. “I was nervous and young.”

“And embarrassed about everything,” Matt says. “Don’t forget that part.”

Adam rolls his eyes and leans in, kissing the side of Matt’s head. “Thanks, babe.”

“That’s cute,” Mox says, taking a sip of his sugar with a hint of coffee in it. “So, I forgot this all started from a question I had.”

Matt tilts his head and looks at Mox. “A question?”

Mox nods and takes a long draw from his coffee. “Yeah.” He glances at Adam like he’s checking for permission. Adam makes him wait a moment, just for his own fun, and then shrugs.

“Go for it, man.”

Mox’s smile is lazy, like he’s really relishing the opportunity to make Adam and Matt wait, which doesn’t work super well since Adam just pulled that move. Mox can do his best – making Matt wait is Adam’s second favorite past time. “You two are engaged now.”

Matt beams and glances at his hand. “Yeah.”

“Jesus, look more stupid about it. I dare you.”

Adam kicks Mox under the table. “Be nice.”

“No,” Mox says with a grin. “Anyway, you two are engaged. Getting married and probably doing the whole white wedding and shit.”

Matt and Adam nod. Matt grabs Adam’s hand and squeezes. “And?” he asks.

“Does this mean I can’t fuck you two anymore?” It’s said more casually this time than at Dynamite, like he’s had time to consider it. Adam’s not sure if he likes it; if it means he’s come to terms with the idea that he can’t, that’s a little disappointing.

“What would make you think that?” Adam looks over at Matt, who’s got the most innocent, blank look on his face, like he didn’t ask almost the exact same question the night they got engaged.

“Don’t give – okay, I’m just asking.”

Adam fights his own smile as Matt tilts his head to the side. “Why?” Matt asks. “Do you want to again?”

Mox’s eyes flicker to Adam’s, who has remained very carefully blank. “Yeah, Mox,” he asks. “Do you want to fuck us again?”

“Oh, no, I don’t know if I like this,” Mox mutters. “I’m not a big fan of the two of you ganging up on me.”

“You liked it last time,” Matt quips, and Adam breaks. He laughs and his coffee shakes on the table when he bangs his hand on it.

“Okay, Jesus,” Mox says. “We gonna do this?”

Adam shrugs. “I’m in. Up to you, Matty.”

“Of course I’m in,” he says, scoffing. “Well, I guess, technically, you two are in.”

Mox and Adam groan, and Matt giggles.

“Is he here yet?” Matt asks, peeking out the window. “I feel like he should be here by now.”

“I sure as hell hope not.” Adam is halfway through dusting the fan, a task that should be done monthly but is lucky to get done ever, and glances around. There’s still things he wishes he could get done.

Matt looks at him and sighs. “He’s Mox, Adam. He’s not going to care if our blankets aren’t folded perfectly or something.”

“I care,” Adam says, and he can hear that he sounds a bit whiny.

“You sound like me,” Matt scoffs. “And even I know that’s not a compliment.”

Adam channels the annoyance into productivity and manages to get the couch looking at least a little presentable and the laundry put away before he hears Matt say, “He’s here!”

Adam’s in a mild flurry for a moment, unsure of where to put himself, and settles for pouring a glass of water for himself and chugging it while Matt gets the door.

He can hear them chatting amicably as they walk in.

“Yeah, Adam built most of it,” Matt says. “Ranch style. Old man is always worried about his hips.”

“You are both turning forty in the next year,” Adam says. “Also, hi, Mox.”

Mox nods at him. “Hey.” There is an overnight bag on his shoulder, but he’s fidgeting.

“Do you want to get food?” Matt asks. “You must be hungry from the flight.”

“Nah,” Mox says. “Got something at the airport.” He looks around. “I like the place. You did good designing it.”

Adam can’t fight his smile. “Thanks, man. I always wanted a ranch, you know? And, with AEW, I was able to build my own.”

Their conversations are easy as they hang out around the kitchen island, but Adam watches Matt get antsy. He’d showered for a full hour in anticipation and Adam, honestly, is excited to see how the evening unfolds.

Mox is halfway through a story about Seth Rollins and a rest stop, when Matt holds up a hand.

“Wait,” he says. “I have a question.”

Mox glances at Adam, then back at Matt. “Um. Yes?”

“Is this because you have a plan, or are we just beating around the wrong bush?”

“Was that a sex joke?” Adam asks.

“Shush,” Matt says. “Because I’m, like, really happy you’re here and I don’t want you to think we’re using you, but I got real thorough in the shower and I’m sort of antsy.”

Mox’s eyebrows shoot up. “Antsy, huh?” He grins, something Adam absolutely recognizes. “Always so desperate for it, isn’t he.”

Minutes later, they’re all naked and on each other. Mox is on his knees behind Matt, mouth and tongue working at Matt’s body like a goddamned expert, and Adam is swallowing all the moans from Matt’s lips he can.

Matt turns away, panting. “He’s really – he’s good at this, Adam,” he says. “Fuck, Mox, oh my god.”

“You made him swear!” Adam says. “Oh, this is great. Keep going.”

There’s a slurping noise and then Mox says, “Can’t. Fuck, my jaw is killing me.”

“Bed,” Matt says. “Bed, I want – I want you both at once.”

Adam shrugs. “Sure, we can do that. Done it before.”

Matt shakes his head as he crawls on the bed, hands and knees.

“Oh,” Mox says. “Oh, I get it.” He looks over at Adam. “You ever heard of spitroasting?”

Adam sighs. “Oh, of course. Fill all his holes or whatever.”

Matt squeaks.

“You like that idea?” Mox asks. He crooks a finger and beckons Matt toward him. “Want me to fuck your mouth while Adam fucks your pretty little ass?”

Matt nods, transfixed on Mox, as he crawls onto the bed and leans down to lick at Mox’s cock. “That’s exactly what I want,” he murmurs, and Adam wonders if that’s more to himself than to the other two in the room. “Please?”

Mox nods. “Course, baby. Anything you want.” He’s incredibly gentle, pushing only the very head of his cock into Matt’s mouth. It’s a beautiful sight.

“See?” Adam murmurs, pressing a kiss to Mox’s shoulder. “I told you you can still fuck us.”

“Shut up,” Mox says. But there’s no malice in his tone, no anger. He rolls his shoulders as Adam runs his fingertips down his back, with just a little hint of nail. “You keep that up, Cowboy, were gonna have an issue.”

Adam laughs. “Maybe I want to have that kind of issue.”

Matt pulls off, looking petulant as always. “Aren’t you supposed to be fucking my mouth or something? This feels like you’re distracted.”

Mox groans. “Fucking hell, Matt.”

“I’m just saying,” Matt says, and he turns the eyes on. “I wouldn’t be talking and annoying if you kept your dick in my mouth.”

Mox looks at Adam. “How the fuck do you put up with this?”

Adam sighs. “Love, I guess. I find it pretty cute.”

Mox shakes his head slowly. “And I thought Eddie was down bad for Yuta.” He strokes Matt’s hair a little bit. “Alright, open up, pretty thing.”

Adam watches Matt beam as he does as Mox says and it’s just as good a view the second time.

“Alright,” Adam says. He kisses Mox’s shoulder before he can think better of it, and walks around the bed to stand behind Matt. “Gonna finish getting you ready now, baby.”

There’s an excited little sound from Matt as Adam traces his finger along Matt’s skin. His fingertips play along the soft, round muscle. Adam will have fun with taking his time. Matt doesn’t seem too distressed by the wait, but maybe that’s because he’s kind of already getting what he wants. And he’s already so slick with spit. Adam’s finger slides into him easily, no lube needed, and grabs the bottle with his other hand.

“Good work, Mox,” he says. “He’s almost ready.”

“Yeah,” Mox says, smug. “I’ve been told I’m good with my tongue.” He winks.

Adam rolls his eyes. “No need to be a prick about it.”

When Matt’s ready, Adam smacks his ass gently to get him in place.

“Ready, baby?” Adam murmurs, teasing at Matt’s hole with his dick.

Matt nods around Mox’s cock, then pulls off. “Yes. Yes, I’m ready. Let’s go.” He wiggles his ass, and isn’t that the prettiest sight Adam’s ever seen.

Laughing, Adam slowly pushes into Matt, taking his time. Matt, on the other hand, has more immediate ideas. He shoves back against Adam, leading to a surprising little yelp from Adam himself.

“You good there, Cowboy?” Mox asks, and Adam absolutely hates that little smile on his face.

“I’m good,” Adam says, running his hands up and down Matt’s hips. “I – just surprised is all. Matt here is being annoying.”

Matt rocks back, taking all of Adam’s cock inside of him, and throws an incredibly glare over his shoulder. “Annoying?” he asks. “You’re the one who’s being all weird and slow and precious about it. You are supposed to be spitroasting me, not acting all cute about it.”

“Get my dick back in your mouth and shut up, you little brat,” Mox says, but even the most obtuse of people could see just how fondly he’s looking at Matt. “Christ. I can’t believe I wanted to fuck you again.”

“I can,” Matt says, and sinks his mouth around Mox again.

It’s not long before Adam and Mox figure out how to help Matt go completely boneless with a little bit of a constant rhythm. It’s not fast and it’s not aggressive, which is kind of unexpected for how Adam knows Mox behaves in general and how Matt likes, but Matt seems as happy as he’s ever been to be nothing more than used as he rocks back and forth between Mox’s dick and Adam’s.

Adam keeps looking at Mox, because he feels Mox looking at him, but then Mox will look away. It’s kind of weird but kind of funny, all in one, and he realizes a second too late he’s laughing.

There’s a weird little shift, Mox yells, “Hey!”, and Matt turns around to glare. “Sorry, is something funny?”

“Not – yes, but no. I was thinking about – Mox keeps looking at me.”

“He’s looking at you?” Matt asks, incredulous. “Sorry, we’re having sex. Is eye contact crossing too much of a boundary for you or something?”

Mox snickers. “You tell him, princess.”

“You’re just as bad, weirdo,” Matt says. It doesn’t sting, Adam thinks, because Matt leans back in and wraps his mouth around Mox again.

This time, when Mox looks at him, he holds eye contact. It does something weird to Adam’s whole body – electricity, desire, and still a hint of that hatred that got them all here in the first place.

His hips start moving faster and he realizes he’s not going to last long when he can hear the way Matt moans around Mox’s cock.

“This,” Adam pants, “is stupid and I fucking love it.”

“You’re stupid and I fucking –” Mox’s eyes widen. “Anyway.”

Adam’s so startled he comes. It’s a new thing for him. Rather unexpected. But it’s beyond good, startling even, and Adam grips Matt’s hips as hard as he can.

“Fucking Christ,” Mox groans. He pulls back and looks down at Matt. “Can I come on that pretty face, Matty?”

Matt whimpers and nods, and Adam gets just enough time to lick his hand and get a hand around Matt before Mox is cursing and painting Matt’s face.

“Oh, my god,” Matt whispers, and he pulses in Adam’s hand. Adam watches as Matt licks Mox off of his lips.

“Fucking – get up here.” Mox cups Matt’s face and pulls him to kneeling and kisses him, getting both of them messy. The movement pulls Matt away from Adam, which is a bit of a shame, but the sight may be worth it.

Mox pulls away with a grin, face a mess. “Couldn’t resist, man,” he says, his smile turning lazy. “Especially if this was gonna be the last time?”

“Who said that?” Adam asks. He stands, giving Matt room to flop on the bed. He’s beaming. “You’ll disappoint him if we don’t do this again.”

Mox’s expression goes softer than a man who brought a Death Jitsu hoodie to their hookup should be able to pull off. “So, you’re not gonna kick me out?”

“Did you think this wasn’t a sleepover?” Matt mumbles. His eyes are closed. “We have a king bed. If you get annoying I’ll kick you to the foot and I won’t feel bad about it.”

Mox glances at Adam.

“You think I’m gonna make you leave?” Adam asks. “We both invited you to hang out. It wasn’t like he had to argue to convince me.”

Mox smiles again. “Yeah, okay.” He opens his mouth to speak, but then his stomach growls so loudly even Matt perks up.

“Wanna get pizza?” Matt asks. He stretches his arms above his head, clearly making a show of it. “I’m feeling pizza tonight.”

“Pizza it is,” Adam says. “You better not get some sort of weird, gross order.”

“I don’t!” Mox says, rolling off the bed. “My order is perfectly normal.”

One bedsheet change, a pepperoni, mushroom olive, and anchovy pizza related argument, and three separate pizzas later, the three of them are dozing off, just chatting.

“I hope that answers your question,” Matt mumbles, snuggled up with his back against Adam’s front with his head on Mox’s chest.

“Question?” Mox grumbles. His eyes are closed in the low light from the window. He looks younger.

“If we could still sleep together,” Matt says. His voice is even less clear now, and Adam knows he’s seconds from falling asleep.

“Yeah,” Mox chuckles, smiling. Adam kisses Matt’s temple and reaches out to touch Mox’s hand. Mox doesn’t flinch. “Yeah, it does.”

Mini Playlist: Hey Cowboy - Devon Cole Faceplant - LOLO Feed the Beast - Arizona I Could Get Used to This - The Veronicas

As my actual real life has been chaotic, I've had to wait longer than planned to edit, revise, and post this. But I'm glad you have stuck with me with all the hooplah. I hope reading this fic brought you as much joy as writing it did for me. To conclude the final Matt Experiment, thank you <3

#HangMatt #HangMox #HangMoxMatt #MoxMatt #wtf i like wrestling now???#in which sara writes #anxious millennial dreamboat #DID I NEVER POST THIS???#QUOI LE FUCK

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tea-and-secrets · 1 month ago

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so i feel kinda emberassed and guilty about this and i know im not 100% innocent in this considering i did do something that could be seen as upsetting to the other person

so afew days ago (monday 21st of october for anyone curious) i had made an archive blog for someones art that was popular in a fandom im in (primarily on twitter, but also had a tumblr acc) who had gone inactive after someone made a thread that "exposed" them as a proshipper

i want to say as a sidenote: the evidence was flimsy, alot of the interests the person had were popular and it wouldnt be surprising if you saw someone post OKKO and camp camp together since they are both really popular media, the typing quirks are simple enough, using the "same type of memes" is stupid, and aside from that it could be very easy to copy them for whatever reason, the only thing in that thread that made sense was their ao3 bookmarks since theyve linked to it, and yeah there was some werid stuff in there and i REALLY believe that those two accounts werent the same person, but this isnt the point of the post (and for the sake of the mod do not bring discourse here i will throw rocks, this is just to clarify more)

so i made sure that the person was completely inactive and didnt have an alt or something that they were posting on (i own another archive blog and i did the same thing) i really like saving stuff i liked since people would be able to enjoy it and this person had locked their twitter account, and with me not following it it led me to be unable to acess it, so seeing as that both their public accounts have not been active in a month i figured it was a safe bet

so i had 6 posts not including stuff for the pinned, afew posts that were queued and alot of drafts of their art from tumblr (which i wouldnt have posted since it was still up, but i figured just in case), i didnt really expect much of it since this was a really niche artist atleast on here, i wasnt really digging in alot at the moment i just saved what was on google low quality and if i did continue would expect people to chime in and send some or whatever

next day, i notice i have a dm notification and its from that said account, turns out the person had found the account (i am curious to know as to how they found it, given that the most popular post had 9 notes and i used a really simple tagging system to filter the posts, im just really really nosey yknow), i got 2 messages from them but i didnt read them all i saw was "take the archive down" and i sprinted to take it down, i already said that if asked for i would so i dont see the reason to not keep my word and i went on

heres the kicker: i was scrolling though some reblogs and i saw that one from this person had the person deactivated, i knew that by changing ur url it could make you look like you deactivated, so i checked one of their rarepair ship tags and all of it was gone, out of curiousity i checked and so was their twitter

i feel insanily bad for making them think they should go all the way to deactivating those said accounts, and now no one would be able to look at their art and enjoy it, and like i said in the beggining i am not innocent in this since i did choose to make the blog and tag the characters in it and look for the art, i just really REALLY heavily believe in archiving and i probably shouldve done a more private one instead (like saving it onto my computer)

inspite of them being really popular, i wasnt mutuals with them, infact they followed me, i did think they were really cool but i wasnt vibing alot with the ships they mainly posted so i just watched from afar, would occasionally reply to my posts and they were really funny, i remember them making a warrior cats au design of a character i really liked and i got too excited haha, i even drew her

on the contrary they got me fascinated in the masha ship (sasha and max), i have never watched camp camp nor am i planning to, however i do agree they should beat the shit out of eachother infront of walmart. in sparkly pink dresses

#no discourse on this post or i eat you ok?#long post #let me know if this needs to be tagged as i'm not familiar with the ships in question

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thegraysquirrel · 2 years ago

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Title in Progress

(Foreword: Hi! (^.^)/ I got semi-challenged into writing some sort of Fanfic Dissertation since I've been dropping large comments on AO3 that kind of count as an essay but in my opinion not quite, so I tried my hand at an actual essay on a topic of my own choice.

This is for the fandom Genshin Impact (Video Game) and in particular for a fanfic about the pairing Childe/Lumine that had gripped me and still has a hold on me. The following below is 3.5k words in which I try to take someone along for the journey of reading said fic.

If you don't know anything about the fandom in question but feel curious to read my insights anyway, there are links in the body of the text and me pointing out when to read it. I do dive into more general theory on why I picked this subject in particular for an essay that's not exclusive to this fandom. Otherwise, feel free to skip past it.)

What is the first thing you make note of when deciding if you’ll read a fic? What can make or break clicking on a fic for you if all the other parts were the same? There are a handful of things I focus on when deciding to read a fic:

The title

The summary

The tags

There are more factors, of course. Some people factor in it being recommended by others, amount of bookmarks or kudos or comments, but all of those are influenced by fandom while the title, summary, and the tags are solely the choice of the author. They are the representatives of the fic itself, and some are diplomatic and serious in their duty for it while others are a reflection of… being close to the people in how unhinged it can get (I say this with great affection!).

For today’s fanfic dissertation, I want to take you along to tackling one of my most favourite parts of a fic when thinking about what to comment: the fic title. I could ramble for a long while about various differences in fics with titles for their story, their chapters, or lack of a title. Perhaps you are thinking of a particular fic which title you hold close? Did it have meaning to you prior to reading or did it only get that after you read the fic?

Let’s dive in:

no amount of fear will keep you safe by dovelious

What’s your first thought when reading this title? What kind of themes might it tackle and what contents might the story keep its focus on? Since the title isn’t the only representative of the fic, I’ll hand you the summary and the tags as well since I had them when diving in:

There will not be a peaceful ending to their story. Their final confrontation will test every limit they have. This is the climax of his story, and it is just another chapter in hers. But in this world nothing is ever for certain, and they can only hope it will end with their hearts intact. (Lumine thinks about what circumstances will lead to childe’s final fight on teyvat.)

With this extra info, it’s time to type out a first thought on the meaning of the title and, by extent, what the author considers an important part of the story.

The story title is something that you could find in a fluffy fic of learning about bravery, especially if the perspective of the title is from Lumine (who holds the perspective in the summary). With the death tag, however, it’s prudent to look at it through an angst-y pair of glasses. I’ve done the legwork for us and added something that might have been kept silent for both our characters:

About Childe: No amount of fear will keep you safe (from dying) About Lumine: No amount of fear will keep you safe (from grieving)

I have a big reason to think of it as being from Lumine’s perspective beyond the argument of the summary being from hers, too. Childe doesn’t seem afraid of dying to the point of throwing himself into battles with anyone strong. The only fear he might seem to have is fear for his family’s wellbeing, which might likely extend to Lumine as they grow closer. That, however, feels like a reach but it would become:

No amount of fear (from me for your wellbeing) will keep you safe

It’s still a possibility, of course. What is a given here is that there is a major character death and it won’t be Lumine’s. Whether it’s Childe’s or that of another important character remains a question phrased with desperate hope, I’d wager that the title is important to the two main characters—they’re the two main characters, after all! So, the angst-y pair of glasses will do its work: Childe will die in the end. Let’s bring in the first chapter title to continue this discussion:

allies or enemies? this will be the death of me

It doesn’t matter if Lumine and Childe are on the same side or opposing sides, Ajax will meet his end. As enemies, I can see it clearly too; Lumine survived with two elements against Childe in the Golden House (who admittedly didn’t go all-in from the start, but the point remains that he failed to finish the fight). At the end of her journey, she will have seven elements and have fought and won against more gods and harbingers than Childe has. If they fight as enemies at the end, Childe will lose. If Lumine were an ally, though? The fate of the world is balancing on this and there will be bloodshed to ensure a better world—apparently, Childe will be unable to keep up with Lumine and lose his life in a double battle.

About Lumine: Are we allies or enemies? I’ll survive this, but I won’t come out the same on the other end. About Childe: Are we allies or enemies? It doesn’t matter which, this will be the death of me. Literally.

This is something Lumine would ponder; the Big Thoughts™ on Childe’s inevitable fate compared to the inevitability of her own long, long life. Whether this will be the death of her in the fluffy sense of Childe working on her nerves with his cheer or in the angsty sense of making her care about him and then dying, Lumine will live on with the memories.

I won’t copy paste the chapter, but if you’ve been discovering this fic as you’ve been following along with me, this is the moment to progress to reading that first chapter.

Lumine knows she’s important to Childe because she has eyes. Lumine thinks further ahead after Childe sought her out to spend time adventuring with. She’s going to be a big part of his story, while he remains contained to one chapter, and that difference in scope? It might creep up on Lumine just how far Childe is willing to go for something as short-sighted as “fighting to the death” with a comrade. She might not even be aware of Childe being the death of her, in a way.

Maybe you knew already, maybe you didn’t, but when you search for the fic title on the internet, you’ll find it’s a lyric from Keep You Safe by the Crane Wives. The same can be said for the chapter’s title: Allies or Enemies also by the Crane Wives.

Of course, the title has a bigger chance of remaining important to the overall story while the chapter titles are usually contained to one chapter, so let’s start big again with the story title and then wind our way down to the chapter title.

Listen to the song, open up the lyrics and see if there are things jumping out to you. I did the same and can offer you this:

When I watched my friends/ Rise to the tops of the trees/ With the risk of fall

When Lumine watches her friend Childe rise to the top of the world with the risk of death, she isn’t ready for it. No matter how strong Lumine is, she never wants to rise to the top of the world; she just wants to find her brother.

Time is not your friend

“Though we need not rush, sister. I have more than enough time to wait for you. We have always... had enough time.”

Time had always been a friend to Lumine or worst case scenario: a stranger. There are now people Lumine will care about who do not have enough time to wait for her and there will come a time when it’s impossible for her to wait for them (because they are long gone). If she takes having time for granted, it will stab her in the back in due time. It’s neither friend nor stranger but a secret third thing: an adversary.

The older I get/ The more fears I collect/ I gather them from/ All the people I meet/ Their stories reveal/ Regrets their smiles can’t conceal/ I carry them/ I carry them with me

There is a reason Childe is a chapter in Lumine’s life. She will carry him with her, as the moments with him were enough to be worth a chapter. Childe will be the death of her, and Childe will give her a fear she did not have before meeting him.

What if the steps I take turn out to be mistakes?

What if when she flips the coin in a decisive battle, it lands on the wrong side?

“Come what may.”

This is something Childe has long since mastered. If he dies, he dies. If he doesn’t, he’ll find a next battle. If they spend the night together at the beach, come what may, Childe will make the best of it.

Title: no amount of fear will keep you safe

No amount of fear will keep Lumine safe from continuing on in Teyvat, and then it might just be Childe who will, come what may, brave the risk of falling down, down, down.

We took a look at the song behind the fic’s title, so what about the song behind the first chapter’s title? Play it in the background, open up the lyrics, whatever floats your boat.

Instead of picking out lyrics as I did with the previous song, I’m asking a question. What do you consider among the most important things to have happened this chapter?

I have multiple things I notice. Childe makes Lumine promise they will fight one final battle together (as allies? Or as enemies?) before she leaves. Though Paimon was hesitant to take Childe up on travelling together temporarily, Lumine had little problem with it. Why? Because meeting Teucer gave her a new insight. Childe hearing about Lumine’s brother gives him a new insight. I propose that the song is not a reflection of Childe and Lumine’s current predicament. Instead, the song is a reflection of a character most impactful to the chapter and in this case, it’s Aether.

Aether and Lumine are at the end stage of the song, being together as kids and now not knowing if they are allies or enemies. It's the crux of this chapter—yes, it's great that Childe and Lumine are travelling together and that Lumine confides in Childe with her reason for getting stronger, but that's the centerpiece: Lumine can't fight with Aether and if she would have to go separate ways from him, period, it will be the death of her. Aether appears so shortly, but he's lurking in the narrative and is a focal point for Lumine and her connection to Aether of allies or enemies.

As for Childe and Lumine? They are at the start stage of the song. They're at the stage of being able to crack up and smile instead of holding on to the fight between them or staring at the other as they wonder if they should clap each other on the shoulder or drive a blade through it. Because they are at the start, they are going to head for the end of the song too, and Lumine and Aether's connection of allies and enemies will be reflected and paralleled in the relationship Lumine and Childe will build up.

(That’s my guess going of the title, tags, summary, and this first chapter and its title anyway. I’ve been right in my predictions and I’ve been wrong. I think there is a reason for the tag Lumine & Aether as well as Childe & Lumine, and it’s paralleled with this chapter title.)

I’ve got another thought about this chapter’s title, but since I’ve only come to realize the hypothesis after reading the second, let’s march onwards to chapter two.

safe ship, harbored

Since there was a theme with the previous two titles, it’s an easy choice to do an internet search and find that it is yet another song by The Crane Wives, creating a theme thus far for the two of seven chapters planned. To listen to the song on YouTube, click here, and find the lyrics here.

What does it mean, a safe ship harboured? Like all of us shippers know, a ship wants to set sail to truly be alive, whether through fandom or crumbs of interactions from canon. It can be dangerous to go out there, but the alternative means the ship is stagnant.

When I read the song, I am reminded of one person in particular.

The Tsaritsa.

She is a ship Childe should not waste his bottle on for blessings. Where does his faith fall in her? She lost all of her good years on that throne while the Fatui planned and planned for centuries for this, and she hasn’t fared across the world all that time. She is the Goddess of Love, yet she hasn’t seen the people in Teyvat to love as the plans unfold and cause death and desolation. She is not born a safe ship; she is made one because Celestia cost her everything.

I then proceeded to read up to the second paragraph—I suggest you do the same.

My verdict after reading it is that the Tsaritsa absolutely is the safe ship in the harbour (an archon safe on her throne in the palace). Lumine proves she herself isn’t a ship safe in the harbour by being on the move: last chapter, she was in Liyue and right now, she is in Snezhnaya and braving the worst blizzard to get to the throne room.

The question I was left with is if it will be Lumine who withholds the bottle of blessings on the ship or if that’s our favourite Harbinger. I’m holding out for Childe because to Lumine, the Tsaritsa is just another archon. To Childe, it’s been the archon at the ice palace that will finish what she started centuries ago. When glancing at the tags, you’ll note that there is a Childe & Tsaritsa tag, signalling that their relationship is important to a section of this story, and that’s why I’m rooting for something this chapter for Childe.

Take this as your signal to read the second chapter in full. I’ll be talking about its contents, whenever it comes up now.

Childe had the choice between dying for his Tsaritsa or yielding. As if he understood the message his Tsaritsa is silently screaming to her followers, Childe opted not to waste his life to bless the Tsaritsa on a journey she might not even make. Childe yielded, and Lumine even hints that the Tsaritsa wanted to teach Childe a lesson here. Don’t break the bottle, don’t waste your blessings on me.

Now that we’ve got most of the second chapter out of the way, we can make a short side-step and make ties to the previous chapter and overall story.

The thought of bloodthirsty blue eyes crossed her mind, and she gripped her blade tighter. [...] This will not be an easy fight, and she knows that delaying the inevitable will not get her anywhere.

There are soft call backs to the story title's song in this chapter: time is not your friend, and delaying the inevitable will not make you braver. So Lumine does not delay and moves forward.

This chapter's title: safe ship, harbored, ties so nicely with the story title. no amount of fear will keep you safe. The ship might be in the harbour, it might be seen as safe, but its fear of setting out in the harsh world won't keep it safe because danger will find its way to it eventually.

(The danger here, of course, being Lumine.)

Similarly, no amount of fear would keep Lumine safe in her battle with Childe, but for the time being, it was keeping Childe safe. Lumine defeated three Harbingers already and mentioned that the numbers of Fatui had thinned—I doubt she has given the other Harbingers the same grace she gave Childe, because even when he is an enemy he’s an ally. A friend. Something she reminded herself of by getting that mask off so she saw her friend Childe instead of the imposing enemy Harbinger. I know how I will interpret it, but it’s up to you what you read between the lines.

At the end of the chapter, Lumine and Childe make plans to travel together. What does that mean in the context of this chapter’s title?

Instead of staying safe in the Snezhnaya, they set out on their dangerous journey. Instead of staying docked in the harbour, they set sail with the risk of getting hurt, and seem to avoid what happened to the Tsaritsa. Remember, however, that the Tsaritsa was not born a safe ship. Something or someone wore her down, and it could be “Celestia” being the culprit but most importantly: losing someone very dear to her broke her. Just like the previous chapter seemed to have Lumine and Childe at the start of the narrative of the song, it could be the case here. They go around the world, but one of them will sink and the other will remain docked in the harbour because of the scars that experience left. With it being the end of Childe’s story and only the end of a chapter in Lumine’s, you can fill in the blanks who of the two becomes a safe ship, harbored.

This brings me to the final metatextual point: this whole fic’s premise. #thinking about all the ways childes character will end.... All these chapter titles and other relationships so far have been warning signs of Lumine’s (and Childe’s) future, similar to how certain aspects in the game’s narratives have been warning signs of Childe’s future, particularly how he’s toeing the line with death. The chapter titles all have a bearing on someone else’s present and are the writing on the wall for Lumine and Childe’s possible future.

Since you read Genshin fic, you’re likely playing Genshin Impact. In the various quests and hidden in the lore that describes the history of Teyvat through books, weapons, artifacts and other writings, you’ll find that the same stories are happening over and over again. I’d argue that every time a story gets repeated, though, it goes just a fraction better. (Alhaitham’s story quest has Alhaitham, whose design and characterization is inspired by King Deshret, outright rejecting the collective consciousness King Deshret worked towards with the Golden Slumber. I have high hopes for Mondstadt to end up differently than Khaenri’ah, what with all the parallels between Aether’s connection to Khaenri’ah, ours to Mondstadt, and just general connections between Khaenri’ah and Mondstadt.) The people in the current stories make a better choice and avoid greater tragedy than those in the past. That’s why I can’t lose hope that all these warning signs of death to Childe and warning signs of isolation for Lumine remain that: they take the better path because those in the past took the tragic road.

And if it does end up with Ajax dying far too young, then the warning signs were all there. While I can’t say, “I knew it,” I did know it remained a possibility. Even though I’ve thrown all these words of analysis on the titles in the fic, and I will do so on future chapter titles too, I’m no closer to finding the answer of how this fic will end. Future chapter titles will prove if the current theme I’ve settled on will hold:

The song is by the Crane Wives

The title is primarily about someone else or a relationship Childe or Lumine has with someone else

The title is secondarily about Childe and Lumine, acting as a warning sign of their future

I have many, many more thoughts about the fic, but they don’t revolve around the subject I carved out as my focus: titles. I will, however, point you to read the first chapter again and then read the last scene between Lumine and Childe in chapter two. The parallels. Read it again, and then look down:

Talking while watching the stars (Lumine's home, in a sense) - talking while watching the snow (Snezhnaya, Ajax's home). Lumine sharing a part she doesn't tell just anyone (her most important person: Aether. He hasn't showed up yet, but he's so important, lurking in the narrative, being Lumine's main quest) and then Ajax doing the same here, with the sun rising (his name! something he still has of before he became Fatui. Before he got lost in bloodshed. Before he fell in the abyss. When he was a bright-eyed kid listening to legends told by his father when ice fishing). Childe reached out to Lumine to travel together for a bit in chapter one and in chapter two, Lumine reaches out to Childe to travel together for a bit. So many delicious parallels that, just like Childe said in chapter one that Lumine is important to him, it’s clear in chapter two that he is important to Lumine.

I’ll wrap it up now, as this has reached beyond what could fit in two comments on AO3.

The title is the first thing we see as a reader, yet it might very well have been the last thing the writer decided on for their story. The title is the beginning and the end, as we uncover more and more through the story about what the author considered—one way or another—the most important representation of it. The title is just a random combination of words at the start you hold no connection to, yet as you progress though the story, your understanding of the fic grows with every word, every paragraph, every chapter and everything else you can get your hands on as being meaningful to the title.

Somewhere down the line, the random combination of words will hold meaning of its own. Somewhere down the line, the title in progress just became the title and heart of the story.

#Chilumi #Genshin Impact #Lumine #Childe #Tartaglia #gray and the adventure of commenting #I'm also quite chuffed about the meta of my own title #I also just want someone to screech with about the fic #It's a bit introspective about both Lumine and Childe so far #AND other characters too which reflects back on them #I've been losing my mind over it and am due a reread

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honeyed-blossom · 8 months ago

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this is such a cute prompt 🥹🫶 ty domi for tagging me on my main!!

What kind of bag does your MC carry, if any?

Valeria hauls around a brown leather messenger bag she stole borrowed from her big sister (two years ago and no one asked for it back so technically, it’s her’s now). She did bring an actual school bag but alas, it’s in the depths of a dragon’s stomach. The only reason she was able to salvage this one was because she had it strapped to her cross-body style and had a death grip on it during her little skydiving episode. She loves decorating her bag so it’s adorned with a pink bow (her childhood best friend’s keepsake), and some trinkets she made into charms: sea shells, lily of the valley charm, caduceus icon, and a crow pendant she found while exploring the golden snidget’s nest with Poppy.

How organized is their bag? How long does it take them to find stuff they need?

Definitely not the most organized person. By Salazar’s grace, the bag has a good number of pockets so most things, like her books, quills, and knickknacks have a place. But Valeria tends to scribble on random scraps of parchment and dumps them in so it takes a little bit of digging to get out what she needs sometime. Grace taught her the extension charm after papers started bulging out her third week out. Eventually, she started helping clean out and reorganize her bag once a week. What would Valeria do without her very patient roommate??

Which object(s) do they use the most?

Variety of different ribbons and a wooden comb - Contrary to popular belief - that a girl from London would look neat and without a hair out of place - Valeria could not do her hair. Her grandmother or sister had always done it for her she is baby and with the hair oils and other products her grandmother sent with her also in the dragon’s belly, she had let it frizz up and curl into itself. Eventually, she made her way to Madam Snelling’s, who lost her mind at the initial state of her. Valeria left the salon to only knuts to her name but with ribbons, comb, hair oils, and newfound hair taming skills. She often combs through her hair throughout the day or ties it up if it gets too wild.

Her Field Guide - this book is her ride or die. She has quite literally everything in here and references this every ten minutes. Especially the map… she’s usually ok with directions but she always has the map open when she’s trying to navigate the castle.

Honey lip balm made out of beeswax - she’s got to stay plump and hydrated… just in case. Too bad she’s not doing any kissing because who has the time ??

Perfume - it smells like jasmine and rose with a citrusy top note

Handkerchief - to wipe off all the dirt, blood, and potion explosions

Mini notebook - Valeria likes to jot down random thoughts, sketches, and notes during her adventures. Sometimes, she’ll press pretty flowers she finds as bookmarks

Which object(s) do they cherish the most?

Laced Handkerchief - Embroidered and gifted to her by her best friend, Valeria often reaches for it when she needs comfort. It’s a dainty silk thing, with lace borders and an embroidered pattern of flowers and birds. Her friend also added a pair of pink ballet slippers in the corner. Valeria had asked Professor Fig to enchant it so it wouldn’t get dirty or lose the faint smell of her friend’s perfume.

Assorted letters and notes from Professor Fig - Valeria keeps all of his letters in her bag, initially to keep her secret secured. There are also a few random notes from when he tried to explain Magical Theory and runes to her. Later on, she would often read them when she missed him :(

Music Box - a keepsake from her elder brother when he left for Hogwarts. It plays the tune of Ave Maria

Which object(s) should they probably throw away?

Her random scraps of paper. There’s nothing of real value here. Just what she wants to eat for dinner or which ashwinder camp she should hit next. If anything, it’s incriminating evidence…

Candy wrappers and empty boxes of flavored beans

A random pair of glasses she picked up - she keeps meaning to sell these but forgets every time. It doesn’t help that it’s probably buried at the bottom of her bag.

Rose Hill and Otto Dibble’s love letter - she really did forget to give this to him

Which object(s) is the highest in value?

Probably the beasts in her knapsack or her wand

Music box

Money she has a bit of a spending problem so it’s especially valuable

Which object(s) is the weirdest / least expected?

A pair of woolen socks - Valeria gets cold easily so she always keeps a pair on her in case her toes get cold. Sebastian had found out during their escapade to the mines and would not stop teasing her about it. She was this close to using crucio on him to shut him up… jk she’s anti dark arts

A knife

TELL US what's in your MCs / OCs' bags!! I wanna know all about the things they carry everyday. How many bottles of wiggenweld potion are in their bag? What's the story behind that letter they keep close at all times? Why the heck do they still have the candy wrappers from years ago?!

Questions you can start with:

What kind of bag does your MC carry, if any? (If they're a baller with no bag u can tell us about that too)

How organized is their bag? How long does it take them to find stuff they need?

Which object(s) do they use the most?

Which object(s) do they cherish the most?

Which object(s) should they probably throw away?

Which object(s) is the highest in value?

Which object(s) is the weirdest / least expected?

Feel free to pick just some of the questions, or come up with your own, and answer them however you like - write, draw, create a moodboard, i dont care, just have fun!!

I'm tagging ppl below to kick it off but **ANYONE IS WELCOME TO PARTICIPATE** please do I beg you

NP tag: @theladyofshalott1989 @a-usernamelol @gothic-lottie @rypnami @boxdstars @myokk @honeybadgerdontcare394 @theravenchild @infernalrusalka @espressoristretto-patronum @saibugslegacy @traceyc-uk @diana-bluewolf @lyworth @galaxiasgreen @polarisgreenley @resilient--snake @anomalyaly @accio-bagel @hot-cocoa-and-blankets @savingsallow

#hogwarts legacy #hogwarts legacy oc #valeria davenport #oc prompt

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j2zara · 6 months ago

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5, 14, 17, 20 (from any of the lj3 fics...?), 23, 31 for the fic ask :3 :)

I’m blabbing, and i’m at peace with that.

5. What’s something you learned while researching a fic?

You overestimate the amount of work i put into things when i could just accept that i make bad decisions. I won’t lie, when it comes to fic i let a LOT of contrivances slide or i just narrow my scope so i don’t have to look up stuff. I swear i do research but i tend to fall down rabbitholes that will distract me from getting anything done fjeklwaje. Looking up random shit about DND is how i learned wayyyy too much about the sorcery class tho it was so funny. And then i realized i made a mistake and sorcery points can only get you so many levels in spells without just completely wiping you of spell slots so the clones can’t actually use teleport but like. Artistic liberties i guess.

14. What makes you happiest? New fic comments, kudos, bookmarks, user subscribers, story subscribers, or Tumblr asks?

I mean, i enjoy literally anytime people go out of their way to read my stuff! esp if they say something nice bc i know being on the other end of that can be kinda nervewracking and feel like a lot of pressure, but i do feel like the obvious answer is comments lol. Tumblr asks are fun but answering them is a lot of pressure, and i do feel bad when i let them sit. (and sometimes i let them sit for months on end, oops). And there is something really sweet when you see someone has left something nice in the tags, or if they say something about the fic when they bookmark it, but yeah. Comments do just help a bit with morale.

That being said, i know i’ve dug my own grave in that i’ve fallen into such a small hyperniche of basically just liking my own semi-OCs that i’m trying to be cool about knowing its hard to get ppl to care abt the things to make. In a way thats like, i get it, i’ve been on the other end of it, life happens, people get busy, their interests change, and even if i want to care, it’s hard to understand someone’s OCs in the way they do. Anyway, hits, kudos, taking the time to read my stuff it all means something to me, i know that’s a bit schmaltzy but idc i'm feeling kinda fragile rn so i do mean it

17. What is something you recently felt proud of in your writing?

Honestly i’ve been really down on my stuff, i know i keep joking that like i’ll reread my old stuff and be like “oh this is fire so sad the writer has a piano dropped on her head” which is true, but its mainly bc i just write in a way that i like but i also know its very indulgent and not in step with like what is considered good, at least i don’t think. Last thing i wrote was so short and indulgent just for me, which is so funny to think about that im like. Yeah the 2k fic where they cuddle for a little while in the indulgence, not the 50k of smut i banged out over the summer in a weird fervor…

I think it’s just hard to think of something and like. Be nice to myself i guess, bc this new thing, i kinda just wrote it bc sometimes you gotta throw the blorbos through hurt/comfort just to feel something lol, i really extra didn’t care about craft i let it be kinda just for me. I guess I think I’m good at imbuing a story with, like, an emotional throughline? If things feel too mechanical, I really do try to make sure the characters motivations are the reasons they do anything and tether it to like, conflicting desires i guess?. I don’t think this is the best version, i’ve done it better, but like, it works.

20. Share your favorite kiss scene from [insert fic]. If there's no kiss scene, share your favorite moment of intimacy (romantic or platonic)

I think you said anything LJ3 so i’m gonna go with the ending of Say What You Mean:

"Friends, El. I promise. Starting—" He's distracted by the way she's biting her lip. For some reason, she's staring hard at him. "Wait—" says El, and he's struck by the note of panic in her voice as she surges forward. "El—!" He can feel her hand caressing his jaw, and then—a quiet, pathetic mmph of surprise as his mouth is stopped by a real and good proper kiss that he wishes could go on forever. There's the peace he's been longing for. (He wonders—if this means that he's as hard to give up for her as she is for him.) Finally, Ellie parts from him. Their foreheads touch, still practically breathing in each other's air. Selfishly, J3 thinks to himself, maybe she's going to cave, tearfully take him back, tell him it's all been a mistake, that she can't live without him, that he's Hers, he's always been Hers— "Okay. Friends," says J4. "Starting... now."

The first kiss in Stay / Leave is fine but i think it’s hard to convey something momentous like that, IMO i think describing kissing or really anything physical but esp kissing can read really mechanical and underwhelming? So it's this one. I know it's a bit cheesy, and imo i think i’ve disrupted the pacing a bit but idc. I know everything’s practically been scrubbed but when were joking about the “no kissing when they’re FWB” thing, obviously that’s funny but i realized i was shutting myself off from an avenue of expression of intimacy so the story kinda became about how they came to that decision? There’s something like, funny and bittersweet and sad all at once about LJ3 desperately wanting to care for each other and be vulnerable with each other so they keep prolonging how long they can get away with that before they start drawing lines. And since it takes place before Stay / Leave i was like. Well. I can’t have them progress too far in their relationship, overwise it undercuts their real moment of clarity in Stay / Leave.

Anyway, if i struggle with something in a story, like well i can’t make them progress in their relationship b/c that would ruin stay / leave, usually i realize then the story should just be About that (Biggest Lie too is like. Oh J3 and Porter have absolutely NOTHING interesting or unique to say to each other? That’s the problem with their relationship then). So its like. Oh, so this a story about people standing still! They should be acting cold to each other given their circumstances, but it just doesn’t feel write to depict them being cold to each other, so its about how they’re actually really bad at being mad at each other jfklejalfa

(Also i love when J3 sucks just a little bit. Like he sucks! Why would you break Ellie’s heart and hope she comes crawling back to you. He sucks. I love him,)

23. What’s a story you’d love to write but haven’t even started yet?

I’m gonna cheat in that i might have like a 200 work doc somewhere starting Solesian Play AU (aka the one where LJ3 steals porter’s godhood from the luxury sex object prison dimension) but like it’s not REALLY started… i think the momentum for that one is lost but idk maybe i’ll be able to re-psych myself into it, but in my mind it would be an ambitious project.

ALso I’m like. One chapter into Unnamed LJ3 Reincarnation project so it technically doesn’t count. But its basically nonexistent. The idea of Ellie going to Aguefort to get research on reincarnation so she can find her best friend and her soulmate is just a fun concept tho! I don't want it to get away from me even if the initial momentum has passed, which SUCKS. The way i’ve been motivating myself to write it is by pretending im writing a fic for like my 2.5 friends. But life is soooooo getting in the way.

31. What fic meant the most to you to write?

it feels like a copout to say everything but i do kinda feel like everything in cloneverse is like collective work rather than individual pieces. It is hard to pick tho, I think the only one that like, i think is good but I don’t really have any sentimental attachment to is Biggest Lie, but there’s an argument for If You Yant Divinity, Almost, Stay / Leave, and Say What You Mean. (And While You Were Sleeping tbh its not AS sentimental but it does mean something to me to prove to myself i can still like. Write).

Anyway. It’s funny bc i’m so not in the headspace i was in when i was like so captivated by starbreaker (but it has been a little fun to recapture the love loses energy where they’re both so evil for Unnamed LJ3 Reincarnation Project in a way that does get me to care about them a little. I’m still fascinated by anyone who can get doomed by god and God). But also If You Want Divinity was something that meant a lot at the time and I am really proud of it, it’s harder to look back on now but i do think the flashback memory tunnel Detect Thoughts + Teleport still succeeds at being emotionally resonant.

And. There’s some things i would maybe change about Almost but i do think it’s special. Even if i think it could’ve been more fleshed out the succinct version is still evocative, at least I hope. I really did set out to prove that the clones were characters capable of evoking Pathos and i do think or hope I succeeded. I know i clown on blue a lot these days and he’s a bit of a forgotten child bc of LJ3 but i swear i really do love him, he’s easy to love, and it is funny to think of a time when i was like. No. I’m not making more clones. I won’t do it.

Stay / Leave and Say What You Mean feel a bit joined at the hip, it's hard to separate them in my mind, and i do think they belong together. Idk why, I have a lot of sentimental value placed on Say What You Mean not for any real reason, i think it just makes me feel that way bc its such a sentimental piece, but ultimately Say What You Mean maybe means slightly less to me bc Stay / Leave was the first time i realized like. Wait. Are LJ3 like. In love??? And for the way it changed the timeline forever that's gotta count for something, right.

#jan.ask

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