#but you both gotta deal with it bc thats whatever that situation is. its such a good character dynamic

[so-very-small]

me: been a while since i made some fluffy g/t ocs, i should do that

the little mouse who runs in circles in my brain and talks endlessly about g/t: oh no

me: you took the fluff and turned it into a fucked up enemies to devoted lovers dynamic, didn’t you

my little brain mouse: oh yes

[tezzbot]

Oh geez I didn’t think of that uhhhhhhh. I guess both???

okay uhh most to least oblivious im just gonna do generally bc im not in a. romantic mood or whatever GDJDG

i think in general choromatsu is the most oblivious, he's so very in his own head like. Most of the time and that contributes to both his anxiety but also his to his ego. it feels like a lot of the time he has no idea how people see him he tries so hard to present an upstanding citizen persona, has since they were teens, but fully has no idea how bad he is at hiding what he doesnt want people to see yknow

karamatsu i think would be next but honestly i feel like his obliviousness is intentional its like. a defence mechanism at this point but once again it adds fuel to the fire of ego yknow, but again i feel like if he wanted to be he could be higher up on this list he just doesnt? want to be aware if that makes sense. atleast imo lol

then uhh osomatsu i think, sweet guy who lives in blissful ignorance most of the time, obviously when it comes to his brothers he can read em like an open book but with everything else i feel like hes just like eh. whatever someone else can deal with that lol willful ignorance but it takes less effort than karama he simply is too stupid to see whats right in front of him lawl but when he does notice something that concerns him at all it generally has his Full attention even if he doesnt bring it up himself at first which is why hes above the other two anis

uhhh ichimatsu i guess would be next but i feel like hes ignorant in the sense that if it doesnt interest him he just doesnt pay attention? like hes pretty observant when somethings got his attention like hes v much a quiet observer but if nothings obviously concerning or smth he deems none of his business he'll just let it go otherwise. just like in general i think bc he doesnt? rlly care what people think esp when hes with his brothers hes not too bothered about paying attention either

todomatsu is definitely the most Clearly aware of everything that goes on around him he can has and will use it to his advantage especially when by himself he studies social interaction for a living and is always able to immediately jump on his brothers bs sometimes before it even happens theres a reason hes a straight man for so many skits, hes also rlly good at reading a room his social skills far surpass the rest and can be in control of a situation/get out of one he doesnt wanna be in so easily

and finally believe it or not jyushimatsu is (in my opinion) the most in tune with everything and everyone around him, hes so emotionally intelligent and is completely in control of his actions. majority of his gags are reactionary he notices every little thing. imo thats why suuji such a good duo is bc jyushi can pick up on the Nothing signals that ichimatsu gives off. but literally the only reason he doesnt seem that way is because he only reacts to something if he thinks its necessary or funny literally his character establishing line in episode 2 was "i just couldn't get a laugh" hes a human cartoon character but hes literally So grounded because he can pick up on how others are feeling and if a situation does or doesnt call for a goof. he like. cultivated this ditzy persona around his family but watching him around any one off characters like homura, eitarou + his ma, even kin-chan, obviously hes still silly but theres the side to him you dont see when hes with his brothers. hes literally so smart and intelligent idk if im wording this right but i have so many feelings about this ya gotta believe me doc hes so smart and aware he just uses it for his own purposes which is for the most part comedy and making people SMILE!!!!! my jyushimaaaaaaaahahahahaaa😭😭😭

anywya idk if yhis made sense but smile does a little pose

[twodimecastle]

fifty bucks & six months.

spencer reid x gender neutral reader new relationship, secret keeping nonsense, 4.5k words, ao3 a/n; turns out i love writing texting fic but tumblr destroys the formatting rip

zero months.

You smile conspiratorially, extending a pinkie towards Spencer and he gives you a skeptical look.

“You know the odds of being found out immediately are-” he starts, but you cut him off.

“Astronomical, I know. I know. But don’t you think it’ll be fun to see how long we can push it?” you wheedle, not caring that your voice sounds more like begging than is strictly dignified because seeing the way Spencer’s nose crinkles in amusement at your heavy handed persuasion is too adorable to pass up. You scoot closer on the couch, tapping the end of his nose with your pinkie finger, letting him catch your hand between his as you continue “I think we’ve got a good shot at hiding it for a little while. It would be like a game.”

Spencer draws your captive hand to his lips, brushing them across your knuckles and watching fondly as you forge ahead in your campaign to persuade him, enjoying the show and the attention too much to tell you he’s already on board. Your eyes are shining with the prospect of the caper, and you’ve made no move to take your hand back from him, and Spencer’s pretty sure he’d be more than happy to sit with you in this moment forever. “I mean-” you go on, gesturing animatedly with your free hand, “you’re like-a really good liar when you want to be. And everyone else always forgets how good you are at it.”

He snorts at that and the sound makes you light up, eyes tracking the arch of his brows, the warmth in his soft brown eyes, memorising the way he looks like this; utterly unbothered, completely at ease. It might be your favourite version of him, but that race has always been a tight one with no clear winner in sight. You have lots of favourite versions of Spencer. Twisting your hand in his, you tangle your fingers together, savouring the way you feel his thumb glide delicately along your skin and the unhidden joy in his face at the simple show of affection.

Time to play your trump card.

“$50 says we can hide it from the whole group for at least six months. If everyone figures it out before then, you win. But if not everyone has worked it out by then, I win.”

The mischievous shine in your eyes is irresistible, and Spencer smiles, disentangling one of his hands from yours to extend his own pinky finger.

“You’re on.”

The words barely make it out of his mouth before you’re colliding with him, pressing your lips to his.

two months.

“So, how long has this whole thing been going on?” Derek’s question catches Spencer off guard, and, based on the way he can see you freeze in his peripheral vision, takes you by surprise as well. Sliding into the driver's seat of the SUV, Derek continues “I hope you didn’t think you were gonna be able to keep me in the dark for long, pretty boy. You should know better than that.”

Following mechanically after him, Spencer takes the passenger seat, trying to frame his next statement as carefully as possible as he hears your door close and the car start. “We were-going to tell you guys-” he begins uncomfortably, glancing back to you for support, but you look just as on edge as he feels. “We were just gonna-keep it to ourselves for a while-before telling Hotch and everything-” he tries again, the mounting tension levering his shoulders higher and higher with every passing moment, but then Derek just laughs, shaking his head.

“Hey, I’m happy for you, kid. For both of you.” He spares a look at you in the back seat through the rear view mirror, and you can feel the tension in your jaw relax, the furrows in your brow straightening out at the note of approval in Derek’s voice. “I’m glad you two finally figured it out,” he says, fondly, and you laugh.

“I bet Spence we could keep it from you guys at least six months,” you explain, reaching forwards through the centre console to link your pinky with Spencer’s, and the touch of your hand releases the last of the tension he had been harbouring as he covers your hand with the other one of his own. He knows Derek clocks the motion, filing it away in his mind somewhere, but he doesn’t care about the scrutiny so much right now. Not when your hand is so warm and comfortable in his.

Derek reaches for the dial on the radio and flicks through the channel, thinking about something, and as you watch, a slow mischievous smirk spreads across his face a moment later before he glances first at Spencer and then at you.

“I’ll tell you what,” he says to you, and Spencer can feel a familiar grin tugging at his own lips as he watches a plan take shape in his friend’s eyes. “I’m happy to sit on this information for a while for a cut of the winnings from whichever one of you comes out on top.” He snorts good naturedly as he continues “I have my own bet to win with Prentiss, so if you two help me win that one, I’ll cut you in too.”

“A quid pro quo of sorts,” Spencer says slowly, and he feels your fingers tighten around his, as you snort softly, and he knows instinctually you’re grinning the same way you always do when you’re winning a game. “I think we can do that.”

Derek grins, turning the music up as he nods, eyes on the road. “Then you two love birds have got yourselves a deal.”

two months and two weeks.

PG: youre not as slick as you think you are ;)

YN: ???

PG: ;))))))))) you should invest in some concealer for your work bag sweetness or tell the good doctor to pay more attention to whats visible in your work clothes

YN: oh my fucking god wait how do you even know thats how that happened

PG: im all knowing and all seeing im like the omnipotent goddess of the fbi

YN: derek blabbed

PG: he sang like a canary but also im an omnipotent goddess im also totally clued in on the whole bet situation with em so for the low low price of every single juicy detail about how this adorableness went down you can buy my silence :)

YN: im getting derek decaf coffee on all coffee runs from now on >:( traitors dont get caffeine

PG: darling sweet angel i need deets all of them like immediately

YN: >:( fine ok so. after that case down in georgia a few months ago? the weird one? with the creepy mother son thing?

PG: omg yuck pls dont remind me im here for the CUTENESS not the MURDER

YN: sorryyyyyyy anyway so spence was like being super weird about it all on the plane and whatever but he was doing that super annoying thing where he ignores it and says hes fine so everyone leaves him alone

PG: YEAH why does everyone here do that ALL THE TIME its SO annoyingggg

YN: ikr its insufferable and like super not subtle ANYWAY. spence was being weird and whatever and i just. refused to let him sulk on his own or whatever like i could tell there was something bothering him and so after work i insisted that we were gonna get like shitty diner food or whatever and watch a movie and he knows better than to say no to me

PG: smart boy

YN: so we got fries and milkshakes and then went back to his place to watch a movie and he was still like weird and silent and like brooding yknow? but whatever just figured hed talk about it when he was ready so i put on a movie and offered to make popcorn and then he was just staring at me and he looked so SAD and TIRED and i thought id done something wrong like the poor guy looked like he was gonna cry and i was panicking over fucking popcorn and then he says ‘why are you always so nice to me?’

PG: oh my god hes like if a sad victorian orphan was actually a triplicate phd holder

YN: i was SO thrown off i was like spencer. spencer were best friends. ive been forcing you to hang out with me for years now why do you THINK im being nice to you its bc i care about you asshole and then. like after another million years after letting me sweat it out over whether hes about to cry for like fucking years the asshole grabs my hand and says. i shit you not. ‘you know im in love with you, right?’ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PG: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YN: anyway hes my boyfriend now :’) dont tell anyone tho gotta win the bet

four months.

Lingering by the elevator, you glance around at the uncharacteristically silent office building, waiting for Spencer to leave the bullpen. The sound of his footfalls drawing nearer makes you smile and you mentally applaud yourself for suggesting the two of you remained behind after disembarking from the plane, taking advantage of the manufactured privacy to take the same car home, back to his apartment.

When he sees you waiting for him, he can’t help the soft fond smile that tugs at his face, as he reaches for your hand, sliding his fingers into yours with a gentle squeeze, the quiet of the building allowing him to indulge in the show of affection. You return the squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder with a yawn and as he presses a fond kiss to your temple he’s rewarded by a sleepy hum of approval from you that sends a rush of quiet joy shooting through him.

“At least we won’t be sleeping in hotel beds again tonight,” you say, voice weary, and Spencer nods as he shuffles you into the elevator. The doors slide shut and the elevator starts to move and in the moment of absolute privacy, you steal a kiss, tilting your chin up to catch his lips with yours, revelling in the soft huff of surprise he lets out, even as he smiles against your mouth. Even after months, the simple act of kissing Spencer still feels new and thrilling somehow, like you can’t quite believe it’s something you’re allowed to do.

His nose brushes yours and he breathes “unless something big comes up, we get a sleep in tomorrow too,” and the way you beam at him sends his heart racing in his chest, unable to look away from the fondness shining in your eyes.

As the two of you exit the elevator and make your way through the Bureau car park, you tuck yourself against his side, wedging yourself under his arm with a happy sigh, eager to get yourself horizontal and asleep as fast as possible. Spencer brushes his lips against your temple again as the two of you close in on his car, almost free and clear of the office when a voice behind the two of you brings you up short.

“Reid?”

Spencer is reacting before his mind catches up, turning on his heel towards the sound of Hotch’s voice echoing through the parking lot, conscious of the incriminating way you’re still tucked against his side, even as his brain is rifling frantically through any possible excuses for the current circumstances.

“Hotch-” you step away from Spencer, cheeks flaming, not wanting to chance a look at him. “I-we-thought everyone else had gone home,” you trail off lamely, trying your hardest not to balk under Hotch’s ominously impassive scrutiny. A second passes, then another, and the short silence feels like months, or years even as the three of you stand locked in a stalemate.

“I take it the two of you would prefer to keep this under wraps?” He asks, finally, and it registers with Spencer, somewhat belatedly, that Hotch’s tone isn’t admonishing. It isn’t enough to dissipate the tension coiling in Spencer’s muscles just yet, but he spares a glance at you as he nods, and a moment later, Hotch gives the two of you a curt nod of his own. “I’ll tell you what,” he says, a shade of irony colouring his voice. “If you two fill out the paperwork for in-team relationships for me, I’ll keep it to myself. I understand privacy is hard to come by in our office.”

The words take a while to fully sink in, and you’re conscious that you’re standing there blinking and gaping at your boss like a bemused fish for a good few seconds before you’ve composed yourself enough to say “absolutely, sir. Of course. Thank you.”

Hotch nods again, heading towards his own car, and as he passes the two of you, a brief smile flashes across his face.

“Congratulations, you two. Get some sleep.”

four months and three weeks.

Spencer isn’t sure how late it is, but he knows you’re not asleep yet, the faint glow of your phone screen casting faint distorted shadows across his room as your free hand rests lightly on his chest. In the dark blue twilight of his room, the space feels undefined and dream like somehow, the line between his mind and his surroundings blurry or indistinct somehow, and as you huff out a near silent laugh at something on the screen in your hand, a thought rises to the surface of his thoughts like flotsam on an unwanted tide.

The more clinical part of his mind notes the autonomic response in his body, the way his heart lurches unpleasantly in his chest, heart rate rising with an influx of cortisol through his nervous system, automatically rifling through ways to control the anxiety response. Age old instinct surges forwards, starting to push his spiralling anxiety down out of sight so as not to bother you with it, but then your hand shifts infinitesimally on his chest, fingers curling in the soft fabric of his pyjama shirt, and for once his body is miles ahead of his brilliant mind, your name is leaving his lips before he’s really aware of it happening.

Your gaze flashes up from your phone at the sound of his voice, soft and hesitant, and you let the screen go dark as you set it down. You can feel Spencer’s heart hammering against his ribs under your palm, and your brows knit together in concern as you shift closer to his side, tracing gentle circles over his shirt with your fingertips, the repetitive motion intended to soothe, though you’re not sure if it’s for his benefit or yours.

“Yeah, baby?” You ask softly, working hard to keep the rising worry from your voice. After three years of friendship and almost six months of dating, you know him well enough to sense when his propensity for overthinking and catastrophizing is slipping out of his control. You can feel his chest rise as he inhales sharply, whatever he’s about to say cut off by second guessing, doing nothing to pacify your concern. “Spence? Is everything okay?” You ask again.

“This-bet-hiding our relationship-it’s-” he trails off, throat tight as he rolls onto his side, facing away from you, and smushing his face into the pillow, already wishing he hadn’t said anything. You’re the kindest person he’s ever met, but offering up this kind of raw insecurity feels like pulling teeth. Even if it’s you. Especially if it’s you. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to find out if you care about him enough to stay when his racing mind gets the better of him. The pillow muffles his voice as he says “never mind.”

You feel your own heart rate tic up in response to that, matching the wild beat of Spencer’s that you could feel under your palm only a second ago. “Baby, talk to me. What’s on your mind?”

He shakes his head, face still hidden in the pillow. “It’s stupid.”

He can feel the rush of your breath on his back as you sigh, and your voice is almost achingly patient as you say softly “it’s not stupid if it matters to you.” There’s a long pause, and you press yourself against his back, settling close and letting your hand slide over his side to rest on his chest, the heat of his skin sinking into yours even through his thin shirt. In spite of his height, he feels so small as you wrap yourself around him, drawing closer, trying to reassure him without yet knowing what he needs to be reassured of. “Spence?”

“Are you ashamed of-being with me? Is that why you want to hide it?” The words are almost whispered, the sound almost lost against his pillow and your heart sinks, plummeting faster and further than if you’d dropped it off the side of a skyscraper. You should’ve known he might worry about that, should have realised it might have felt that way. Remorse rises hot and bitter in your throat and you swallow it down, trying to steady your voice.

“Spencer. Sweetheart. No. Never. I could never be ashamed. I love you. I’m so sorry.” Your arms wrap more tightly around him and you bury your face against the crook of his neck, the tension you can feel in every inch of his body making you feel more cruel and short-sighted than you already do. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise it might feel like that. I could never be ashamed of being with you, Spence. You’re my favourite person.” He takes the kind of shaky, shallow breath that comes with trying not to cry and your heart breaks a little more as one of his hands slowly moves to cover yours where it rests against his chest, just over his heart.

As his hand rests over yours, his thumb strokes lightly along your knuckles, and he knows you know him well enough to notice the way his hand trembles, just a little, because then your hand is shifting against his, turning to clumsily tangle your fingers with his, holding tighter to him as he tries to collect himself, drawing in a deep, shuddering breath as his eyes squeeze shut. He can hear the contrition in your voice as you say softly “I’ve never really liked having people know everything about what’s going on in my life. And I love our friends but-something like this, that’s so-special? So new? I wanted to be able to keep it to just us for a while.”

“I’m sorry.” His voice comes out a little shaky, scarcely more than a whisper, and it’s more than you can take as you pull back and gently force him to roll over to face you. He’s not crying, but his eyes are glassy and you recognise the fight to keep the tears unshed in the tight set of his jaw and the hard line of his lips. Leaning on your elbow, you lift your free hand to gently smooth out the furrows of his brow, letting your fingers linger along the planes of his face.

“Why are you sorry,” you ask gently. “You don’t need to be sorry, baby. Not for talking to me about things that bother you. We can tell everyone else tomorrow, if you want? We can call off the bet. Derek will live. If he’s got a problem with it I’ll turn all his shirts into crop tops.”

He can tell the joke is a last bid attempt to make him smile, to ease his fear, and it works. In spite of the anxious weight in his chest that feels like it’s pressing him into the mattress, Spencer laughs weakly, meeting your eyes, and he watches as a relieved smile breaks across your face, releasing your lower lip from where you’d trapped it worriedly between your teeth. The unmitigated affection that floods into your eyes renders him momentarily breathless as he takes in the moment. You’re still here, still trying to take care of him. Just as kind and steadfast as ever.

“No,” he says eventually, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you down on top of him like a living weighted blanket, letting your warmth chase the bulk of the tension from his body and luxuriating in the way you curl into him, one hand sliding into his hair. “We shouldn’t call off the bet. We still have to take Emily’s money, remember?”

Your sleepy laugh is the last thing he hears before his eyes close and the feel of your body wound around his lulls him to sleep.

five months.

SR: Can I talk to you about something?

DM: you dying or something? that’s a really fuckin ominous text to recieve out of the blue

SR: I’m not dying, why would that be what you assumed? I just have a question.

DM: just a figure of speech but what’s up?

SR: It’s about your bet with Emily. What’re the terms for it?

DM: wym?

SR: What exactly did you two make the bet about? What needs to happen in order for you to win the bet?

DM: does this count as collusion?

SR: Technically yes, but calling it collusion implies a certain degree of illegality.

DM: whatever anyway the terms i made with em were that you’d make some kind of move before your birthday but she reckoned you were gonna need some kind of near death experience to do anything about your crush why?

SR: I’m just making sure I have all the information.

DM: what’s going on pretty boy? you planning something?

SR: Maybe.

DM: not a helpful answer reid is everything good?

SR: Everything’s fine. We’re just figuring some stuff out. Nothing to worry about.

DM: is there something you’re not telling me?

SR: Don’t worry about it.

five months, three weeks and six days.

In the chaos that was the scramble from the briefing room to the jet, you haven’t yet had the chance to speak to Spencer about the outcome of his most recent thesis defence panel. By the time you’ve got a moment to breathe, the jet is underway, coasting across the country towards Montana, the whole team settled in for the six hour flight. You corner him in the tiny kitchen area of the jet as he’s making a mug of mediocre coffee, fingers tapping out an absent minded rhythm on the countertop as the coffee machine whirs, clearly not paying attention to anything outside of his head.

“Hey, boy genius.” He jumps, whirling around, eyes wide with surprise, and you smile fondly. “So?” You demand, and Spencer raises an eyebrow in confusion. You snort, rolling your eyes as you elaborate. “Your defence panel. Did it go okay?”

You’re shifting your weight and fidgeting restlessly with the belt loops on your pants and as he studies you for a moment, it occurs to Spencer that you’re nervous for him over this outcome. The thought brings an almost giddy smile to his face.

“You know this isn’t my first thesis defence panel, right?” He says mildly, deliberately burying the lede, enjoying the way you scowl in irritation too much to answer your question right away, too enamoured with this display of concern on his behalf.

“Don’t be difficult, Doctor Reid. It’s still a big deal.” He just shrugs noncommittally, and you huff, swatting his arm lightly. “So did it go well?” You ask again, eyes narrowing as you try to dissect his microexpressions, trying to discern the answer he seems determined to keep from you for yourself. A few seconds later, he relents.

“I can now add degree number six to my wall.” He confirms. Getting degrees doesn’t hold the same rush of pride for him now, the accomplishment feeling somewhat less exceptional as he acquires more of them, but the way your face lights up with pride for him reminds him how special the things he’s capable of can be. You’ve always made him feel like more than the sum of his parts somehow, like something infinitely more precious than he always assumed he is.

“I fucking knew it. That’s amazing, Spence,” you say, chest warm and full with pride and love, and his almost shy smile in return is enough to make a decision for you in a split second. Your hand dips into your back pocket, drawing something out, and you carefully hide it from view in your palm as Spencer tracks the motion curiously with his eyes.

Your eyes are shining with affection and something that looks like mischief and the way you’re smiling at him is more than enough to divert his attention as you step closer, just barely noticing as you slip something into his hand. You’re dangerously, distractingly close now, and he’s conscious, if somewhat distantly, that neither of you is concealed from the rest of the team, scant meters away in the seating area of the jet. But you’re smiling and close enough for him to feel your breath on his face and suddenly your lips are on his, and even after nearly seven months of being able to touch you like this, it’s enough to make him forget everything else as he melts into the contact, savouring the warmth of your skin and the faint smell of your shampoo.

You pull back a second later, the kiss over almost as soon as it started, but it’s enough to attract attention, and you can hear a belated ‘oh SHIT’ from Emily in the main cabin of the jet. In your peripheral vision, you can see money changing hands, your friends scrambling to react, but you don’t look at them, choosing to enjoy the bemused, affectionate look on Spencer’s face as his brain catches up to the events unfolding around the two of you.

“I was tired of keeping it a secret,” you say fondly, loud enough only for him to hear. “You win.”

Blinking in confusion, he finally tears his gaze away from yours, fingers uncurling to reveal the fifty dollar bill you had pressed into his palm right before you kissed him. The penny drops and he snorts with laughter, shaking his head in half hearted indignation as his other arm loops around you, pulling you in, letting you rest your head on his shoulder, hiding your face from the rest of the team as he kisses your temple, revelling in the way you wind yourself around him in response.

“I was gonna do this in like two days. I wanted you to win,” he murmurs against your hairline, and he can feel your faint laughter.

“Too bad, baby. I’m used to getting my way,” you say, pulling back to steal another quick kiss before peeling yourself out of his arms with a wink, turning to face the onslaught of ‘care to fucking explain that’ and ‘I fucking told you so’ from the rest of your friends, tugging him with you by your joined hands.

[bulkhummus]

Current Thoughts:

Read several "meet the family" fics with Cecil leaving Night Vale and having to deal with the terrors of mundanity. They're generally great fun and I enjoy them, but the bulk of them involve Cecil trying to chill out/conform/be less weird, usually at Carlos's request.

I have a craving for a story where it's Cecil attempting to act "normal" and failing horribly, while Carlos is encouraging him to just be himself. Bonus points if Weird Shit just kinda follows Cecil around, Night Vale or no. Thoughts?

(Or just your thoughts on Cecil meeting Carlos's family in general)

i actually have a long one-shot that ive been writing that tackles this but — i write cecil differently than i draw him! im gonna put this under a cut because it’s probably gonna be a long explanation—

i write cecil as someone you can’t look at too closely or else you begin to realize things don’t add up (his tattoos change but never enough to be too noticeable, his third eye is really just a scar on his forehead that sometimes looks more like an eye, his carpet bag is too small for the amount of clothes he brought, sometimes his height changes, his eye color my shift with his mood, sometimes he looks softer or sometimes more angular and sharp but you can’t tell if its the lighting or him) — like theres always some loose but logical explanation for the changes in his appearance and behavior but if u think to hard he doesnt make sense.

i have a fic where cecil comes home with carlos for a long weekend— and he meets the whole family. And instead of him conforming to the outside world, its based around what Cecil, And what the idea of Night Vale means, changes the people in Carlos’ family for the better, making them think differently than they did, etc.

I really like the thin line between a stranger and just plain strange. Everyones a little weird before you know them, everyones very complex once you really start to look at them, and I think Cecil knows that better than anyone— and I write him as someone who is very good at getting personal info out of people by asking the right questions (which could be bc hes omniscient or perhaps hes just a good journalist etc). i think horror stories that explore that little overlap are fascinating so i try to write them! i also personally love reclaiming a ‘monster’ narrative and give it a queer lens ( lgbtq+ people who relate to cryptids/monsters/ villains etc which is a fascinating sociological thing And for another post) cecil would think carlos’ family and the outside world is just as strange and fascinating as Carlos does Night Vale!

i hope that sort of gives you a feel— i think cecil would adore carlos’ family and he also wouldn’t realize AT ALL that they’re making faces at eachother when he says something bonkers or dresses crazy because hes cecil and they LOVE AND ADORE carlos and see how over the moon Carlos is for him and therefore they love cecil endlessly. i dont think its in character for Carlos to ask cecil to conform in any kind of way, because i think his love and fascination for cecil is the endless journey of trying to understand him!

(my fic is also about overcoming internalized homophobia/transphobia, though carlos’ family has never been anything but accepting so its not that kind of narrative— like night vale is just a cool accepting place for him to explore and going back to his childhood home means everyones gonna see all the exploring hes done and his very GNC boyfriend kind of way— like the dichotomy of carlos maybe casually worrying “they’re probably staring at cecil because hes wearing a skirt or whatever’ when NO its actually because cecil is three inches taller than yesterday and his family is super chill abt queer stuff is both funny and understandably stressful misinterpretations of the same situation. Like THATS the area i like to explore in a fic/trope like this for wtnv.

one day soon ill post it— its honestly done I just gotta do some editing when i have time and i‘ll throw it up on ao3

[abombihoney]

Does this help?

OKAY SO: is magic in bug fables sapience discussion... GO

going to start by defining what i mean when i use words:

sapient: has some kind of intelligence and decision making

If it is whats the limit? why turn hoaxe into a tree?

uuuh its the everlasting sapling. is baby. wants to become tree obviously. would u like it if a dude ate u and then used ur powers to attack others instead of like, going and getting some goddam sunlight after uve been trapped in an attic for generations? why not just say fuck it and become a normal tree. normal trees dont have deal w this shit

if it isn't why did hoaxe become a tree, why do the artifacts stop affecting leif after they were obtained?

again, saplings become trees. but most likely bc the devs wanted to go with the "bad guy gets themselves killed" trope so that A) the protagonists don't have to make that decision and B) they dont have to think of something to do with him in the post plot

perhaps leif's magic senses just needed to adjust? like walking into a bright room, you just need to take a for your eyes to adjust.

the watcher points both ways

yeah thats fair. could be a magic robot. could be a guy thats being held together with magic.

Venus says sapience unless she was something before a goddess, which might be a thing with the secret lab room.

yeah its heavily implied that venus was created a few centuries back by the roaches in snakemouth. for. whatever reason. could be gados situation tho, where a real "intelligence" wasn't created, but rather stolen. mmmm thatd be fucked up

I'm trying to figure out how magic works because Leif getting magic via crystal, Hoaxe via crystal. Even the Watcher and Zommoth! But Venus? The sapling? The spider wizard? Scarlet? They don't fit the crystal trend which would point towards sapience!

why does a lack of crystal imply that magic is sapient?

But the watcher is an automation! Performing a task! If you need sapience for magic that doesn't fit the trend! And if you don't need some level of sapience, why is Leif sapient!

a complex task, could be some kind of artificial intelligence rather than actual sapience. "attack things based on these parameters" isnt like, real decision making.

leif came pre-installed with memories tho.

The Snakemouth mushroom enemies! Not any kind of bug or anything that matches any previous trends!

what r u talking about. theres other attacking plants. the chompers and seedlings???? tho i believe its implied that mushrooms specifically came to "life" due to crystal exposure. but they act the same as both cordyceps and lesser bugs in the cave, whose behavior it could be "imprinting" on or mimicking i suppose.

I am! Very mad! About the lack of clarity! And the fact! That I can't really analyze several characters! As a result!

sometimes u just gotta except t hat things dont make sense. u can either bend over backwards to make a theory that could slide into what we know from canon, OR you can just say fuck it and do what u want.

[osdd-1bitch]

// partly a vent? but also if you have any type of advice as to what i can do pls say,, gotta be honest im still INSANELY fucked on if im a system or not :( for a while i was dead set on it but i ended up just not saying anything to my therapist and fell back into that "ok no thats not me, im just a really vivid daydreamer" mindset.

then your blog auto-popped up as i was typing and i clicked it and im back to that "maybe" thing. im just so conflicted rn ughhh goddamnit :( ive been having an extremely stressful past few weeks (no specifics but alot of my trauma resurfaced, alot of shit triggered me, similar traumatic situations etc) and i missed both of my therapy sessions the past 2 weeks, so ive kinda reverted back to being dependant on alters who im not even sure are alters or not. and even THEN im not sure how to bring up to my therapist that i think i may have OSDD or DID?? like idk how im gonna come back after 2 weeks and say "hey btw all this traumatic shit came back up and i think i might be a system bc i talk to people in my head who arent me lol but anyways can i use ur fidget cube?" ??? SO much has happened and im really debating on just pushing down that it might be osdd/did and pretending nothing is wrong for the sake of keeping myself mentally stable yk ?? gotta say i just dont know what to do at all. lets also not forget im 13 and shouldnt even have to deal w this much stress EVER but dfghgtf. im just really struggling to tell if this is my maladaptive daydreaming or DID man :(

MaDD and plurality are weird to work w, especially since MaDD can and often is be caused by trauma and there are some expressions of MaDD that one could put on the plural spectrum. Its mucky either way and can suck to deal with

before i continue, id like to say our experience on therapy has...not been great so ill refrain from giving therapy specific advice for fear of our past experiences clouding our judgement, but you can share the trauma bits and get some help without talking about plurality. the rings system did some videos that might help about talking to a therapist,red flags ect, lovely folks, you should give em a watch if you havent. either way id say you prolly shouldnt bring this up yet, but info is also good in general

and also, some personal advice, be very very careful on the internet, especially social medias at your age. we were in your shoes once and it did fck us up quite a bit

either way, i seriously doubt youll be taken seriously, not in a bad way, full grown adults struggle to get help. and stressing about specifics can just lead to, you guessed it! more stress. its totally fine to drop all lables and just exist for a while and try and do whatever, talking w sysmates or daydreaming whatever, you dont have to name these experiences for now, just live them. doubt is weird, and youll almost def be wout dxing for a few years either way.

just live your life, try not to bring up trauma wout professionals, and be very safe on the internet, and preferably get off tumblr and move somewhere safer, its really not a place for people your age. i know you probably wont listen to that bit much, but at least be extra super safe.

self dxing can take years btw. its not really a matter of weeks, lived experience and analyzing yourself and just questioning takes a lot of time. take it slow

and its totally fine if its not did. or madd. or either. dont stress, dont try and conform yourself to dxes and stuff rn, especially since you are both v young and just started questioning. im not saying your age means you shouldnt, if you have did you have it rn, but things can take time to come to light. just b honest w yourself and open to the options, mkay? self dxing is a lot of research on top of the work. if you started questiong round now tbh many systems if they questions at your age would get a dx or self dx at like 15,16,17 ect ect, and thats if they question. do what helps you and talk to your therapist, you dont have to mention did but talk about questioning disorders and junk.

this sorta age is when figuring yourself out rlly starts to happen yknow? that doesnt mean you should be cornered off n stuff, n kept away from dxes, but it also means you should be very careful n research a ton. if you find smth you resonate w it, keeping it in the maybe pile for a year or two can seem like its a long time, but will help a ton in the end, if its true or not. if its stressing you out a ton, its okay to not think about it for a bit, you have time.

and again, please please please try and get off social medias they can mess w your head a lot, and try not to share your age online again. im torn abt publishing this n may delete this ask n repost the response, but im not sure

tldr:

i dont wanna tell you to not question or identify symptoms, but things change a lot n you are just dipping your toes into life. take things slow and sit on them, thats the best advice given to us at your age. you could be absolutely right, you could be confused, you could be dead wrong, and all of these are okay. just keep yourself open, research and rlly think abt it (like months of thinking abt it) before it can age properly in the maybe bin. and also be safe online, dont share your age and stuff n keep off toxic n inapropriate sites like this best you can. options are open and symptoms can change over time. just exist and take note of things. dont stress over lables, n self dx should stay in the possibly-maybe bin for now, itll be worth the wait

[ssj4]

Sorry to bother you, but I keep seeing posts about a future Goten AU and I keep getting really curious! However, when I try to find links to anything about it I end up at some abandoned URLs.

SECOND TIME TRYING TO ANSWER THIS CAUSE MY IDIOT ASS FORGOT I HAD ONE TYPED OUT AND CLOSED EVERYTHING :)

some disclaimers im getting most of this from an old draft i had written about the au, i havent watched the specific scenes in dbz and dbs that these are based on in well over 2+ years so i dont remember the timeline of events that well so im sorry if some of it just straight up doesnt make sense lol

this whole thing did start out as an excuse to replace the romantic scenes with mai in dbs with goten actually so the truten themes are pretty significant but that aside future goten is a very good boy with a much different personality and outlook on things… much like how future trunks is compared to his main timeline counterpart :3c the whole thing was developed by me and my gf together and we never rly posted too much about it and the broken links you did end up finding were probably from like the one or two times we did but here u go im glad u asked 

I HOPE THE READ MORE LINK WORKS ON MOBILE IF NOT IM SORRY

the big change is it starts out with chi chi getting pregnant before goku dies of heart disease or whatever in the android saga instead of the cell saga, so even after he dies in that timeline she still has their 2nd son and he grows up in the future timeline with trunks.

when they were kids (like 10-15) goten was stronger than trunks just bc gohan and chi chi were there to teach him just a little bit. trunks and goten sparred a lot though so he was able to keep up but never really passed him. (that part isnt really important but i figured it was a nice detail that made sense)

thats when history of trunks comes into play, and they both get really serious about gohan training them. the scene in the movie where gohan knocks trunks out before flying off and getting killed is the same except now he just knocks out 2 kids instead of 1 i guess. 

i feel i gotta add that this au was created when the future trunks arc in dbs was airing, and mai was introduced as his love interest, and honestly in my opinion the scenes were written really well but i just wasnt digging the fact that before she was granted a younger appearance she was already middle aged, like she was old enough to be his mom if that makes sense. so it really isnt a dig on mai at all cause i love her and id die for her its just the romantic plot that i didnt like. so when that was airing i thought “WELL what if that was someone else” 

she’s still with them though in this timeline and she still has her younger appearance! 

the future timeline is still progressing the same as it did in canon, the androids still wrecked the place and no one was strong enough to do much about it so trunks is still set up with a time machine to meet with the other timeline. goten stays back and does his best to protect everyone while hes gone just in case

some stuff happens in between here but skip ahead to trunks coming back from the trip after the cell games i guess! lots of stuff happened obviously like trunks literally dying, spending years in the time chamber with his dad, meeting a whole gaggle of clowns that he’d only heard stories about, seeing gohan as a preteen. hes got a lot of stuff to share!!! now hes back and he can take care of the androids + cell + and goten can catch up and lifes pretty good over there! 😇

during the rebuilding period goten would spend a lot of time with chi-chi and ox-king and still slept over there occasionally which she really appreciated, and he invited trunks and bulma over there with him frequently.

despite this he wasnt present when she died as no one really expected goku black to wipe out the landscape so far from the city, but she and ox-king died along with more than half of the population. (ugh god im so sorry queen i love you😓)

as i said before mai is still here and she’s still the leader of the resistance!

events of future bulmas death is the same as well as mai originally intending to go with trunks when they meet up together in an abandoned building. goten is already there as the three of them rest up a bit and start making their way to capsule corp. goten was planning on staying behind anyways but he wanted to see the two of them off. when goku black interrupts them as they arrive, trunks and goten encourage mai to escape, seeing as she only has a gun and everyone already knows bullets arent gonna work. 

this scene is the same as it was in canon, where trunks tries to rush black but gets beaten quickly. mai trying to buy him time to let him escape is replaced with goten actually fighting him and taking a hit for trunks but getting knocked out as mai did. trunks under extreme stress from already losing his mom today assumes hes dead instantly, (he has dumb bitch disease, he didnt even check for a pulse in canon!🤔) and fires a masenko to escape into capsule on his own 

after trunks pops back in time and black is focused on searching for him, mai sneaks back in to retrieve goten (even though they told her to leave she really just ducked behind some rubble and stayed close, because she wasnt just gonna leave them!)

she takes him back to an underground bunker with other members of earths resistance and when he wakes up she tells him that trunks made it to the time machine and that hes presumably in the other timeline now. 

idk if yall remember it well but i rewatched some of the episodes just for this, and trunks in the main timeline believing goten was killed and mai is alone and he wont be able to get back is so sad. and when he spent that day with gohan and his family and cried thinking about how if black hadn’t have shown up, he couldve had a family too… he doesnt deserve to be this sad 😥

skip to when he’s finally able to get back home with goku and vegeta with him and they make their way to the bunker where he sees mai and goten together! the scene in canon where he rushes over and starts spilling his heart out is the same, with him telling goten he thought he died

they get a really sweet hug moment here when theyre both happy to see the other is still safe and it gives both goku and vegeta some Food For Thought, because goku actually didnt know there was a goten in this timeline, and he doesnt really recognize him at first. vegeta has the idea in his head that this is probably goten.

goten never really had any sort of real attachment to his dad. it makes sense hes never met him, hes only ever really heard about him through others, (his mom, his brother, trunks, and probably bulma has mentioned him as well) so he definitely knows OF him its just that, he doesnt know him. so when he sees the real goku standing there for once a lot of thoughts run though his mind, like, “that looks A LOT like goku black!” “thats definitely my old hairstyle” and “holy shit is that my dad?” but the first thing he actually says out loud is “Holy shit its goku orange” and vegeta really almost loses it because cause any doubt in his mind about this kid being related to kakarot just went right out the window cause only someone related to him would say that

and as you probably know a lot happens after that with them all finding a way to defeat zamasu but i dont want to include all of the rest when you can probably just interpret which scenes were changed  

ANYWAYS now instead of trunks surviving the apocalypse its trunks and goten surviving the apocalypse. thats why its not a really super romantic deal like Who has time for dates when goku black Might possibly be hiding in this abandoned olive garden?? so theyre just very close and privately affectionate

the ending where trunks and mai get to live in a new world with their counterparts is the same except gotens there with them of course, dbs left their ending pretty open 

so that takes care of the story changes, heres some additional details and information on gotens character in this au! 

heres his design, drawn by my girlfriend @ssj2 uwu !! 

he kept his natural hairstyle for a while, but i think he changed it sometime during the rebuilding period after the androids and just let it grow out a bunch. up until then he kept his natural style purely to honor the guy he’s heard so fondly of even if it brought him a lot of mixed feelings when people said he looks just like him. a really distinct feature about his new hairstyle is that the spikes look like horns and i love that a lot !!

and the shawl he wears was the same one chi chi wore 

some personality traits for future goten is that he has a habit of bottling up his negative emotions and has trouble taking care of himself, as hes always more focused on the well being of his loved ones. he can be mischievous and cocky but hes not overconfident (or he hasnt been since gohans death) however in some situations he can be charismatic and assertive which works really well imowhen their timeline is erased and theyre temporarily in the main timeline, goten gets to meet a bunch of people like gohan and his family, chi chi, and even his counterpart 

sorry if this post was messy i wasnt really sure how i wanted to make it look and im kinda bad at dumping information out so if any of its confusing just redirect me to it and ill try again gdjfksjdgsfk 😭❤

hmmm anyways thank u for reading!! its an au we made years ago and we love a lot and i hope u do too! be nice pls!! and send asks about it if you’d like cause its fun to think about! 

[macbookpro-hard-drive]

hi!! so i recently was having the EXACT same problem and when i went to my therapist she always asked me how i was doing and i said “not good im having a really hard time trusting people” and she gave me some really awesome advice that i’d like to give you!! (over the next few anon messages because i have a bit to say lol) (1/?)

i have like. no qualms with any of this but for organization sake (and to keep myself focused) im gonna go through point by point

1. anon i hope ur in a better place now bb!!! thats so awful jfc ill fight someone for u. self-doubt is a fuckin... huge thing and honestly??? a checklist absolutely helps holy fuck its. such a simple solution but its amazing how the little things are the ones that help the most imo???

2. yea man! i intend on having boundaries for whatever relationship i go into rn - especially bc whats up havent been kissed or on a date and i am terrified of both. CB has actually given me some advice on being open about said things with a partner in order to avoid anything just... happening too fast, i guess is the best way to phrase it? boundaries are good. boundaries are important. we gotta stay comfortable.

3. :0 thank u for this bc. i genuinely dont think of 99% of things and this seems like a good starting point??? im also dumb so i dont consider a lot of things and this is just. rly simple n nice and the idea of “start small with trust” is rly rly nice

4. i actually like... talk to my friends a Lot about these issues. two of them have definitely been in the same situation (i.e. bad experiences) and therefore, if not able to give advice (which is rly fuckin valid, i have shit life experiences and no idea how to avoid that/cope w that sometimes), they at least understand? scott’s also really really good at understanding how i feel and talking me through my feelings and giving advice sometimes. talking to people can be really therapeutic honestly - i just kinda have to be careful im not throwing all my problems at them since my friends are my therapist

5. honestly. im gonna go ahead and say that im really dumb and while im actually like... all for writing out my feelings and dealing with them that way, writing a letter to someone to express how i feel never crosses my mind. this feels so obvious and i feel dumb for not thinking of it before, but??? thank u i will die for u anon

thank u anon i can and i will die for u if u ask??? this was a nice series of asks to wake up to, and i hope ur in a better place!!

[divinecuriosity]

Character Development Questions: Hard Mode-- BOG!!!! Al

ALL? is that what this is supposed to say. bc im gonna do All 

Does your character have siblings or family members in their age group? Which one are they closest with? He’s an only child! Maybe a few cousins his age, he probably was close with them before he went away!

What is/was your character’s relationship with their mother like? Good, his moms really supported him to the point where he couldn’t do anything wrong in their eyes. Mom #1 was raised in a temple of Ioun, and is a half orc half elf. She works in the temple she and Bog’s other mom founded and tried to teach him to become a cleric like her, but once he voiced his desire to pursure the arcane she was happy to support that

What is/was your character’s relationship with their father  mother #2 like? Mom #2 was less ready to support the arcane, having converted to worshiping Ioun after meeting mom #1 and never really having a knack for magic. Both Bog’s moms see him as the perfect blessing he was intended to be and dont see any faults in him, and though they are hurt by his leaving they trust in their god and in him that it will be ok (not that he’s had contact with them to know that...)

Has your character ever witnessed something that fundamentally changed them? If so, does anyone else know? YEs! He first stumbled upon magic when he started to just be able to Do Things, but there was a wizard to came to his town when he was a child and showed the kids magic tricks, and Bog came up to him one day and basically said “i can do that too! my mom doesnt know this bc im scared to tell her but here let me show you” and this like, seven year old half orc kid does some medium level spell and the Wizard was just like. damn we gotta teach u. 

On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets? Uhh, not much tbh? maybe some jerkey, a rag for sweat/cleaning things off, whatever coin he has on him? But he always has his drum on a sling over his shoulder, his flute on a chain around his neck, and in a trunk on the lower deck he has his spellbooks and Violin!

Does your character have recurring themes in their dreams? haahhhh he gets periodic visions from Ioun being like,,,, hello my Blessing hows the Doing God’s Work going?? oh youre still on a pirate ship in the middle of the ocean? thats chill like ur moms i think you are Perfect and fully believe you will get back to it eventually, go find some new Knowledge and fill up that brain of yours thanks ok bye

Does your character have recurring themes in their nightmares? He doesn’t really get them I think? hes a happy guy

Has your character ever fired a gun? If so, what was their first target? Do guns exist anna???

Is your character’s current socioeconomic status different than it was when they were growing up? UHH hes a pirate now so. probably less consistent access to money ? he wasn’t rich at all like, medium middle class at best, but now its probably a lot more sporadic access to like , a lot more money

Does your character feel more comfortable with more clothing, or with less clothing? Uhh he wears the same thing like all the time just loose shirt and flowy pants and drum. if he doesnt have his drum he might as well be naked. But he probably hates having to dress in fancy clothes/layers bc Tactile Bad 

In what situation was your character the most afraid they’ve ever been? Uh he’s pretty Freaked Out now tbh, but probably the first storm they had at sea, or the night before he left Bard School

In what situation was your character the most calm they’ve ever been? Hmmm, thats tough idk? Every time he plays music for a group of people and they chime in/dance/just pay attention he feels  p calm and good

Is your character bothered by the sight of blood? If so, in what way? Not really, he doesn’t like seeing people hurt but he isnt grossed out by it

Does your character remember names or faces easier? Names, they get confused when people change their hair or outfit rip

Is your character preoccupied with money or material possession? Why or why not? They arent usually, but since being a pirate he kinda,,, goes along w it and has the mentality of “this is nice!” but its not rlly his end all

Which does your character idealize most: happiness or success? Happiness

What was your character’s favorite toy as a child? Hmmm, probably drums

Is your character more likely to admire wisdom, or ambition in others? Wisdom

What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before? They get crushes rlly easily and then get distant if the feelings arent returned bc they dont wanna talk about Hard Emotions bc they never...had too

In what ways does your character compare themselves to others? Do they do this for the sake of self-validation, or self-criticism? They don’t compare themselves to others past like, oh they have more x than me and i wish i had more of that? More jealousy than him actually putting value to differences

If something tragic or negative happens to your character, do they believe they may have caused or deserved it, or are they quick to blame others? Uhh nothing rlly, tragic happened but his whole thing is he has a destiny he doesnt feel like he earned and is running from it but also feels Immense guilt for doing that so, lots of self blame in this buddy

What does your character like in other people? They like people with passion for something

What does your character dislike in other people? Uhhh being rude to others (like more than a joke, when its obviously upseting them)

How quick is your character to trust someone else? Fairly quick, he needs more friends

How quick is your character to suspect someone else? Does this change if they are close with that person? Uhh idk tbh?

How does your character behave around children? He’s great with them for short periods but once he’s run out of little songs to play/sing and funny jokes he. gets anxious and gets out of there.

How does your character normally deal with confrontation? If its an authority figure? ANXIOUS! if its someone he sees as an equal / he has power over, hes more level headed

How quick or slow is your character to resort to physical violence in a confrontation? Uhh hes weak and slow so, p slow. even spell wise hes more about protecting his friends than damage

What did your character dream of being or doing as a child? Did that dream come true? He’s pretty much always wanted to study magic and be a bard. maybe early early five yr old Bog dreamed of working at the temple

What does your character find repulsive or disgusting? Uhh, standard icky stuff like x-phobias 

Describe a scenario in which your character feels most comfortable. Playing for an Audience

Describe a scenario in which your character feels most uncomfortable. Talking about feelings, especially ~romance~

In the face of criticism, is your character defensive, self-deprecating, or willing to improve? A mix of willing to improve and self-deprecating, depending on whos doing the criticism

Is your character more likely to keep trying a solution/method that didn’t work the first time, or immediately move on to a different solution/method? They move from solution to solution pretty fast, they arent super patient

How does your character behave around people they like? Trying to impress them and also not look dumb

How does your character behave around people they dislike? Glare glare glare

Is your character more concerned with defending their honor, or protecting their status? Honor ig?

Is your character more likely to remove a problem/threat, or remove themselves from a problem/threat? Remove the problem

Has your character ever been bitten by an animal? How were they affected (or unaffected)? Uhh probably not? hes good w animals

How does your character treat people in service jobs? As well as he can!! 

Does your character feel that they deserve to have what they want, whether it be material or abstract, or do they feel they must earn it first? EARN EARN EARN

Has your character ever had a parental figure who was not related to them? Hmm, not really? 

Has your character ever had a dependent figure who was not related to them? nah

How easy or difficult is it for your character to say “I love you?” Can they say it without meaning it? They say it really quickly and usually mean it, they just get close to people fast

What does your character believe will happen to them after they die? Does this belief scare them? He’s pretty sure if he manages not to Fuck it Up he’ll go to Ioun’s realm or whatever, but hes not sure hes gonna,,, not fuck it up,,, or that he even wants that? death scares him so he just doesnt think about it if he can manage

[allbeendonebefore]

What are your favourite head/canon things about Alberta

[cracks knuckles] [stretches fingers]

so i’ll just start with a disclaimer - i use sherry’s/iamp/whatever alberta and i realize ive been getting a lot of followers who are part of rp groups and whatever or people who might be interested in adding some depth to their own ocs so feel free to like… think about these things if you want if you’re thinking of doing an alberta oc?? I guess

so since that mysterious slash implies what are my fave canonical things about AB too I’ll say that there isn’t much- I go with what sherry says on canon rather than IAMP and PC because while there are a lot of things I had influence over in both projos there are a lot of things I would have done differently so we’ll start with the bio

Canon Stuff

literally all the things are accurate sooo its hard lol. Obviously the political situation has changed and the economic situation is its usual rollercoaster (WELL… but thats another time). I gotta say that the ‘alberta beef is the best thing that’s ever happened to me’ is really hitting home right now because i didnt realize how SPOILED i was by AAA beef until I got to Ontario ToT (ngl the pork here is super good and saves me money but the BEEF aAAA)

also my edmonton bias shines through at ‘he hates a part of himself called calgary’ thats by far my second fave B)))

Headcanon Stuff

ok where to start I will try to not make this an essay and i can elaborate more if you’re curious

- a lot of people will wonder about whether a province lives in the capital or the biggest city etc. and I have to say in Bertie’s case it is NEITHER. He’d never willingly live in (d)E(a)dmonton (sorry ed ilu) because Ed represents Government which he Hates and while he would spend a fair bit of time in Calgary he gets claustrophobic/exhausted - he still in my mind represents more of the rural bits of the province than the cities. I think he might move around a little, but he probably lives on a ranch between both cities but within sight of the mountains. I’m sure he has a place to stay in each city, but he’s a country boy at heart and appreciates his space, peace and quiet. 

- Particularly space because Where else is he going to keep his 3 trucks + 2 ATVs + horses + 100000 cows + boat + canoe + kayak + all his camping junk + motorbikes + dirtbikes + tractor + other junk that people leave at his place

- that said his ‘birthplace’ is the southern ‘half’ of the province so he tends to kind of hover around there more- as i said he owns a ranch rather than a farm because the Quality Ranch Land is in the south and the Good Farm Land is in the north (and being eaten up by ugly houses ugh)

- still I think he spends a fair amount of time working up north in the Fort Mac area because Why Not make All the money. Even if you’re a rancher boy in the middle of nowhere, everyone in this province has ties to the oil industry one way or another. It wouldn’t make sense for him NOT to work in Oil and Gas because it’s literally the only job in the province lmao.

- His driving playlist consists of: Dean Brody, Corb Lund, Keith Urban, Ian Tyson, and the obligatory Nickelback which he listens to Un-ironically but also to piss off/drown out passengers when they’re annoying him

- He’s easily annoyed. By Everything. And Everyone. He’s the current national scapegoat and he takes it Extremely Personally depending on the context but also he has a relatively affectionate relationship with everyone and usually expresses his affection by pointed jabs. 

- like he literally gets along with everyone on a personal level and not just because he buys them drinks- his worst relationships are probably with BC and Ontario and that’s just because he lives to irritate them and they respond with an appropriate amount of salt. He still doesnt mind hanging out with them and bc/ab/on/qc is an unstoppable team. He just gets extremely sensitive when anyone asks to borrow money from him and will give you an earful of ‘i work SO HARD for this money to put FOOD on YOUR TaBLe’

- generally really tight fisted with money………. only when other people are looking. he makes a big deal about how little he spends on essential services and you just look at him like ‘so you’re saying you have the money to get all this crap for this rodeo coming up but you dont have the money to take yourself to the hospital after’ and hes like [coughs up blood anime style] ‘im ok i have whiskey and benadryl at home’ [adjusts his diamond studded hat]

- really big on loyalty and straightforward conversations and has NO patience for any hypocrisy or doublespeak no matter how small. The slightest of things can send him reeling with Betrayal. Also this makes him either tight lipped or TMI, there is no in between. 

- like literally reeling he’s very top heavy and you could blow him over with a sneeze, he’s all bark and only some bite. When he’s good he’s Real Good but when he’s bad he’s like a foot in the grave bad

- he’s the baby of the prairie bros but also the one with the brains- and i don’t mean in an academic sense i mean in the ‘so crazy it just might work’ sense. 

- literally he’s an idiot he doesnt understand how equalization payments work no matter how many times you explain it to him. He doesn’t understand a lot of things re: the economy but he never shuts up about them. 

- the easiest way to piss him off is to threaten his autonomy in any way, he will stop whatever he’s doing to put a boot up yer ass if you Dare suggest something like ‘why don’t you let ontario/canada take care of that for you’ even if he knows the way he’s doing something is garbage he will go out of his way to keep doing it because its ‘my way or the highway’. 

- ‘why do you have all those guns’ ‘oh you know hunting deer and stuff’ [really its because he’s terrified a rat is going to sneak into his barn or something] [but he does actually hunt] [and he’s the type of guy to have the ‘trespassers will be shot’ signs]

- I haven’t figured out WHAT truck he drives yet but i am PROUD OF HIM for no longer putting truck nuts on it, THANK GOD that went out of fashion. (That said he does not have the stacks- his truck is lifted and Shiny and also has a handful of Alberta Strong decals/stickers.) Newf probably gave him a sticker of “The Rock” or a nfld flag and he Loves it. On a scale of most to least obnoxious trucks its Mac - Bert - Cal - Ed. It’s probably a white truck.

- i should think about things he loves more, this headcanon list is mostly things that make him angry oops xDD he loves animals a lot, and not just to eat i swear. The bigger and the more horns the better.

- he really loves driving a lot, it’s like a big part of his independence factor. I think sometimes he will just drive aimlessly late at night/early morning when it’s not busy and just go and find somewhere to look at the sky.

- he looooves digging up fossils in his spare time, or just interesting rocks in general. If you say the words animatronic dinosaur he is ALREADY THERE

- he watches a lot of sci fi and really loves star trek. So Much. he’s totally attempted mowing crop circles in his lawn/fields probably multiple times. he’s still waiting for the ufos to come land. Also has a thing for spooky places and cryptids and those weird inexplicable twilight-zone like events that only happen on road trips. did i mention the Giant Roadside Attractions. 

- he has this persona of being a traditional/small-and-big-c conservative but he’s actually really into innovation and trying new things, meeting new people, etc. He interacts with so many different people lately that he’s trying to take the time to really re-evaluate himself and move away from the Klein-era “Severely Normal People” image because it doesn’t reflect him. The issue is he’s more likely to vote on economy rather than social issues so his actual progressiveness gets hidden by lack of political representation (and lets be honest he has Always hated politics). He’s got a lot of crap to sort through but he catches people who underestimate him off guard.

- was probably raised methodist/protestant/whatever but is mostly pretty secular, but he has some definite strong holdovers that make him uncomfortable about certain subjects and his first reaction to being uncomfortable is always anger.

- completely oblivious to being hit on or something or really gay situations around him but is that type of person who is like [cant walk too close to another dude because what if it looks gay bro].

- his fave cow is named buttercup

- he has definitely woken up after a night out with friends naked and alone duct taped to an air mattress and floating in the middle of a lake. true story. 

- he will macgyver his way out of any situation. doesn’t mind getting down and dirty in the mud when it’s necessary. exactly the type of person to shove his hands in bitumen and squish it around or to pick up a rock and lick it or to shove a thermometer up a cow. When he gets squeamish he does his best to be bullheaded and pretend like Nothing is Wrong until he faints. 

- his french is crap but he Tries- the french he knows is backwater northern AB french which he’s too shy to bring up so he feigns ignorance. His german is good and his ukrainian is passable, his spanish is fine, he’s trying to get the hang of some other languages but doesn’t tell anyone he’s practicing because he hates getting made fun of xD

- the hat and boots are Absolutely to make him look taller than he actually is. He doesn’t wear inserts but he does make sure the sole/heel on any boot he buys is Thick. Smol insecure man with a Big hat. Will spend 300 bucks on shoes, but he actually does ride/work so its an investment for him. 

- heads to Arizona/Mexico in the winter when he’s not working, otherwise Banff/Jasper are his ‘budget’ vacations lol. 

i love this stupid province pls ask if you have any more questions because i love to talk and i feel like i’ve said too much already lol

[sramister]

Yeeeeeeeeeeee so like. I gotta a pretty small group of people I chill with. and like theyre all dudes. and theyre all so FUCKIN DUMB sometimes. Like im sorry but dude... why are boys so fuckin dumb lmao. fuckin they all always gotta be so manly its a n n o y i n g. Jokingly called one gay because he was eating nuts, dude he started going o f f "I get more pussy than any of you in the fucking chat" (Probably cause im straight and the other dude is a virgin bc religion? also boy you havent been laid in months fuck outta here) "I would fucking kill any gay guy that started hitting on me" (Dont worry bud you're not that attractive. & also youre the reason people hate straights lmfao what the actual fuck you aint gotta be so violent) it was w i l d. So fragile. I can't deal with it its so funny. and if I call them out on it their like "no im very confident in my sexuality." ya oke bud. s u r e. Literally never once have I gotten angry when people thought I was lesbian? Legit just gotta be like "oh haha nah sorry, u cute tho." AND OMFG THIS IS MY FAVORITE. theyre all younger than me by a year, but they all try to act older and dad-like. they thing theyre so wise, always sending stupid ass motivational quotes that stay at home mom Karen would share on fb with a picture of minions. I told them their advice was dumb and meaningless and they got so mad. legit I said "Youre copy and pasting proverbs and mark twain quotes into the chat and they dont mean anything" so they tried to be like "god youre so negative. wtf" an im just like "ye sure bud. but what if, I just straight up know shit aint always magic and rainbows bc ive been raise in shitty situations. like sorry I didnt get to be raised by two parents who both make six figures and can give me everything ive ever wanted asap." THEY GOT MAD ASF. "Youre only a year older than us. stop acting like you know everything youre not so wise yourself." like ye son I know. thats why I dont ask people my age for legit advice. bc we're all fucking dumb. dont know s h i t. and then they were like yea sure okay whatever. N ya know, theyre too manly. they cant be wrong. so thats how shit ends. "yea sure whatever" later that day I made another joke about one of them being a hick bc thats our joke and he got mad and so I sent "Yall so easy to instigate wtf I aint even gotta try with yall." dude tries to analyze me and fuckin fails. "I think you try and instigate us to keep us from attacking you and focusing on your problems." so i sent "ya sure. you can think that but youd be wrong lmao" (Cause 1. I know my problems and I actually work to fix my shit, so I have few issues atm. 2. they dont let me talk when we're in person. straight up they can ask me something like "what happened to your mom" and Ill start to answer, and they cut me off.) OKAY AND THEN EVEN LATER THAT NIGHT SHIT STARTED OVER ME BUYING A RICE COOKER. DUDE SAID ONLY ASIANS LIKE RICE AND IM LIKE YA OKAY SURE LETS FORGET ABOUT ALL THE OTHER CULTURES THAT LIKE RICE TOO. WE LEGIT WERE EATIN SPANISH RICE THE DAY BEFORE LMAO. So like dude sent some shit like "I only like american shit" and I go "You like very little bc not a lot of american lmao." and somehow that made him go straight to beer. So for 15 minutes we argued about beer. He didn't understand that beer is not american. he kept saying "budweiser is american beer." Like ye ur right, but that doesnt make all of beer American. "We have our own brewing methods, so its american." "okay but like. that doesnt make beer american? it just means weve found another way to make it?" "all beer would taste the same if americans didnt make new things" MY DUDE ITS CALLED A RECIPE LMAO. HE COULDNT UNDERSTAND. THAT FUCKIN JUST BECAUSE WE HAVE OUR OWN METHODS AND RECIPES DOESNT MEAN BEER IS AMERICAN. YEA WE GOT AMERICAN BEER. BUT THAT DOESNT MAKE BEER AMERICAN. BEER HAS BEEN ALONG WELL BEFORE AMERICA. DUDE WAS KILLING ME. and omg I need to make a sep post about the arguement about what is and isnt american even though the shits legit written down lmao. that was i n t e n s e. Home boy left the group chat. sent me a bunch of bs "insults". oh god it was f u n n y a f. stay tuned

[ariyadaivaris]

artemidi replied to your post “boy oh boy i sure hope nobody asks about the embarrassing sappy au i...”

I need......more info on this.....blease

i’ve GOT more info on this don’t you even worry your sweet fred head about it !!

nxt’s tag team division is, to say the least, KIND OF...UH...BORDERLINE NONEXISTENT AS OF LATE and so when the time comes to set up the dusty rhodes tag team classic they really end up needing to Scrumble something together! the original plan was that tyler (bate) (to name specific tylers) and jack would team up however long they needed to for the tournament, but oh NO tyler’s been gravely injured, probably by pete because he’s a motherfucker

jack is stuck without a partner and the tournament is stuck without the final team! regal puts out a desperate call for help and ariya decides to strike a deal because why would he team with jack motherfucking gallagher without something to gain from it

the deal is this: ariya teams with jack, withstands whatever mockery comes his way this time, carries the team through the tournament and when he wins, he gets a shot at the cruiserweight title. ariya is a difficult person to work with but desperate times calls for desperate measures, and so ariya and jack end up being the newest addition to the tag team classic! Oh What Drama ! 

things are TENSE, TO SAY THE LEAST

they have to take a bit of a hiatus from 205 so they can travel with nxt, some of the tournament matches take place at house shows and live events and they do still need to work together as a team outside of the tournament if only because they’d be completely fucked otherwise! jack still can’t drive so ariya (dear sweet ariya who can’t drive for shit) is the official pilot in their travels, and jack is...an...interesting co-pilot

the first few weeks are mostly ariya giving jack Ze Silent Treatment while jack refuses to shut up ever and it’s kind of an awkward uneasy dynamic, even after they win their first tournament match through SOME MIRACLE

ariya finally talks to jack during a drive because jack stumbles onto the topic of musicals and says some things and ariya gets very heated very easily and it MIGHT turn into a cutting discussion about the accessibility of theatre and of bootlegs, and about who and what gets visibility in mainstream media and who and what gets nominated for tonys, etc, but its the most fun ariya’s had in awhile and they both kinda learn smth from it and from then on ariya’s more willing to like. at least talk to jack. and it’s...disappointingly...very nice

i feel like during a house show ariya gets trapped in the corner and almost gets dropkicked but jack manages to get to his corner and use his umbrella as kind of a makeshift shield to throw off their opponent and give ariya time to collect his wits and it’s maybe a silly thing to think about but its cute imo! my city now! 

after their second round match, which they almost accidentally win (against reDRagon, no less, bc let’s be real while we’re being self indulgent here i DO care more abt this storyline than about those two probably very talented but uninteresting slices of white bread), jack compliments ariya’s performance in the match and ariya doesn’t take it well because like. to this point he’s only thought jack’s just been humiliating and mocking him for no fucken reason since they met, and why wouldn’t he turn up this opportunity to backhandedly insult ariya now. and jack doesn’t KNOW that, and so ariya starts giving him a cold shoulder again for no reason as far as jack knows. OOH this drama. OOH this suspense

after they make it to the semi-finals (which no one was expecting, and certainly not them, honestly), they’ve gotta go to a press event with the other semi-finalists and it’s maybe not the most plot relevant thing but ariya does clean up really nicely and jack is maybe a little distracted the entire time because holy shit

and maybe then jack kinda realizes he hasn’t been engaging in a rivalry with ariya so much as maybe he’s had a dumb awful crush on him this entire time and not known how to realize that or express it and spends the night trying to keep his composure (because who is jack gallagher if not composed) while internally just writhing in embarrassment and agony and going “oh nnnnNNNOOOOOOO oh my goddd what did i DOOOO why did i DO that oh noooooOOOOOooOOooOoo” and its a rough night! 

and ariya sees jack being less than 100% during all this and sees it as Oh He Doesn’t Care, Of Course, Why Would He, and he’s pissed because he really thought they were getting somewhere as a team, and alas here they are and jack isn’t even paying attention to what’s happening, what a rude asshole as fucking always, and ariya MAYBE--just maybe--maybe just fuckin clocks jack in the face after jack tries to tell him he handled that really well

and jack sincerely admires that ariya remained pretty composed and serious and focused even when jack was busy trying not to wither into embarrassed gay dust but ariya only hears that as jack intentionally leaving ariya to his own devices and mocking how shitty a job he did

(not that ariya would ever say he thinks he did a shitty job, but in his heart he DOES want to do well and be a worthy contender, and opponent, and partner, and he knows he gets lucky a lot and so when he DOESN’T and when he’s painfully in control of the things that happen to him everything feels amplified and clumsy and Wrong and jack’s not helping lmao. i love drama)

obviously this isn’t received well and jack and ariya get into a brawl and they have to get broken up by their coworkers in attendance and ariya’s just yelling WHAT DID I EVEN DO TO YOU ASSHOLE, WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM

jack stays with mustafa and lince for the night because ariya straight up threw his bags outside the door of their room and locked him out and jack plays the words back and he’s like Wait...Maybe I’m Misunderstanding The Situation Here

and the next morning he goes to talk to ariya 

(who answers the door looking just fine and who hasn’t been alternating between uneasy sleep and furious tears all night, ariya’s fine) 

and he doesn’t like...get the nerve to go “hey i think i might be in love with you a bit” but he does manage to tell ariya he hasn’t been mocking him, and he’s been sincere this whole time, and he’s genuinely sorry he’s been a dick to ariya since they started on 205, but ariya, to be fair, has also been a dick, maybe more in terms of beating people up but jack’s sorry about what’s been happening, and ariya doesn’t have to accept that apology, and if ariya wants to forfeit their semi-finals match, he understands entirely

and ariya’s just like “yo what the fuck are you kidding i’ve still got a title shot on the line and we’re gonna win this, get in the car, it’s cool or whatever cmon lets GO” and he’s a bit flippant about it but for some reason he wants to...start grinning like an idiot and never stop again? for some reason? weird

things aren’t just all Cool suddenly after that because when i say i love slow burn shit i MEAN like, years, they’re still only barely allies but something’s There and that’s endgame, don’t play with me, we’ve gotta get face!ariya calling for a parlay with heel!jack in between here and The Datening for me to feel truly alive but thats just my humble imho

also they lose in the finals but ariya puts on enough of a performance to merit a title shot anyway and after the loss they might not work as a team anymore and they’re back to their own stories on 205 but before they get back to the hotel and get cleaned up and wash off the grime of bitter bitter defeat ariya finds jack sitting with his chin on his knees in the stairwell and sits silently with him and they maybe hold h*nds for like the BRIEFEST of minutes and never talk about it again but like. we’ve gone this far with this shitty badly written self-indulgent embarrassing post right? try and stop me

just kidding im stopping myself now. i hate that i wrote all of this. im gonna kill myself thanks

[survivorjordanpines]

Episode 8: I think I'll call her Vengeance. - Adam

So tonight went well. We didn't have to go to tribal council and Nahte voted out the person I, literally, did not want to meet up with if we swapped again or merged. I don't know Cole, so maybe he's a decent guy, but I've seen and heard some things that were uglie that I just didn't want to deal with. But anyways. This fucking challenge. Honestly, it's like demon music. It's like Satan himself threw up into my ears. UGH.

I know what you're thinking. Adam crushed another redemption challenge? That means it's time for whiny McBitchersons 3 right? Wrong, this episode has been cut short to make room for this heartfelt speech about my love for Andreas: Andreas, Love is like a flower, It only blooms when you're both on redemption and you keep winning together and staying alive and being the only person I talk to right now. And I know I never tell you truthfully how well I'm doing in the challenge but that's only because it's a stupid thing to ask and I'm of course going to lie because although I want you to stay alive too I still want you to only be second best because if for some reason one of the other bitches ever did better than us I still want to stay alive. I had a dream, that one day we would both emerge from the island together, and return to the game we were so wrongfully terminated from. But sometimes you have to wake up from the dream, and realize it's only me or you. And I'm glad it's either one of us, because none of these other weak ass hoes who came to redemption ever deserved it. Like check out these lame fucking scores they all gave. It's like they hardly even tried. The ones that actually tried that is! How many people just straight up quit when they get to redemption? I seen two so far and that shit is funny, it's like you ain't even want it at all! Must be scared or just feelin shitty about being voted out. But bitch we all feel shitty after being voted out! You gotta harness that fury and channel it into your redemption challenges. I'm getting a little off track here, but the point was Andreas is my dude, and while I won't really swear to avenge you because I'm pretty sure the people who voted you out are the friends that I was voted out for having, so it's like if I ever get back I probably won't have much of a choice of who to work with, BUT if given the opportunity I will do right by you, because your chill and friendly and it seems like they did you wrong. So, if I win cool, if you win whatever, that sucks for me but better than someone like Cole winning redemption after just being voted out, cuz this challenge really is anyone's game. So good luck dude. I'm rootin for us

I hate this challenge. There is no way I'm going to be able to discern anything. I know that whoever wins that most useful will probably go the isle. So like I can't wait to get voted out.

This challenge sucks! It is so hard to hear all the different songs. Right now my tribe is very quiet. I hope we have a swap soon so I can have a more active tribe, I haven't talked to anyone one on one in DAYS. Except Drew, he's the only one who seems to make any kind of effort. I'm pretty sure that Regan and Charlotte are aligned but are not saying anything. Why else would they keep trying to be the ones to go to Jordan Island? It is suspicious all right! Lets hope we win immunity so I can do no work for another day :-)

At this point I'm not sure if I'll win. I have a feeling my time is running out. I'm gonna have to do some wicked talking to Adam and see if I can convince him to fall on the sword for me lmao. Doubt it'll happen but you never know. If I can't, then Im gonna give him my idol in the hopes that he can actually do something with it. I'm kind of scared. Redemption Island has always been so good to me... plz dont fuck me over

I feel like I confess too much and I'm going to cringe when I read them back once the season is over. We're about 21 minutes away from the challenge deadline and I just don't know what's going to happen. I think we relied way too heavily on Shazam, but the other tribes are probably going to do the same thing. It's basically going to come down to luck on this one, I think... and who has the more wrong answers to deduct points. Also if Situations isn't that emo song at the beginning, I'm quitting the game right here, right now. No joke. 

GOD CAN YOU BELIEVE I FORGOT KAREN WAS EVEN ON THIS TRIBE SINCE SHE CONTRIBUTED ABSOLUTELY NOTHING?? WHAT A FUCKING MOOD.

Okay so update. Adam told me that he has 12 songs and I have 17 and we are waiting for results and IM GOING TO PUKE IM SO NERVOUS FUCK

(this is meant for last round oops, put it in there if u can) im so fucking pissed off bc of this damn tribe, i am so done w them like really? THREE people threw, apparently bc i wasnt able to submit like thats a shitty excuse just say u want me out or that u want ur ass to be immune and get idols i cant wait for the one round that despite them throwing, me david and ryan get good enough scores to win and one of us ends up immune i hope cole’s ass gets kicked on redemption and emma can choke too AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA When! Will! This! Neverending! Marathon! Of! Tribal! Councils! End!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LczLqQWCihg&feature=youtu.be https://youtu.be/qmpGefnZ0RQ TO TOP THIS ALL OFF I WANT TO KEEP EMMA AND LILY DOESNT AND ITS DOWN TO THE FOUR OF US AND IDK WHAT IM GOING TO DO EMMA WHY ARE U SO FUCKING USELESS WWHYHGUIJYHFILUWYSHDFILCKEWHSFLCAWEVC9OIWAREUHRWLSD,U]

I think I'll call her Vengeance. Winning this redemption was bitter sweet. Cuz Andreas was the sweet but I'm still bitter. A lot of good came out of this though, I'll make sure of it. Cuz God has a plan and I intend to implement it. You know I was just being friendly at the beginning for fun. You know we're stuck on this island for the same reason, and it's nice to have someone to discuss the game with. But we just kept winning together! Did you know he's the king of redemption? I had no idea. Apparently the dude won like a ton on 3 different seasons. But what's a king to a God ;) It's sad when you really do the math. Because before it was over he told me he got 17, and I only had 12 so I told him you deserve it. I still had hope, because I had faith in my answers so maybe he had made some mistakes, and if he got 3 wrong I won. Turns out he got 4, so if he had just not even guessed those, he would've still had 13 and won. But oh well. We were talking before about it, because he said he wanted to give it to me if he's leaving cuz otherwise it's null. Chrissa gave it to him, cuz she knew she wouldn't win but girl didn't even try. 2000 points? Pathetic. I mean we totally blew it out of the water but still. Anyway we asked to do results earlier at like 9:30 and Jordan took a bit to process the scores and he told us it was 12-9. And well, I think you know whose was whose. It was kinda funny, cuz he yelled MY IDOL!!! and I was like Quick throw it to me!!! It would have been cute if he did an *action* but I guess he's not about that. But anyway I lied before cuz as we said goodbye I asked him if there was anyone he wanted me to murder for him. It felt like the right thing to do. He told me again that Ari really did him dirty. I was hoping he'd say her cuz if he had said like Ryan or Jess her allies I would've had to straight up lie, but Ari I can work with. Idk if they'll not vote me out or not but I don't really have allies going back in anyway. I'm just gonna wing it. So now I've done whatever the blunt equivalent of pouring one out for him is, and I had Jordan find me a picture of my idol to gaze upon, and it's this cute little crab necklace. And I'm just thinking, I think I'll call her Vengeance. 

Alright, so. Tribal's happening soon, and while I am hoping it all works out, a part of me is kinda worried. I know David Robb isn't gonna be going, that's for sure... But I WAS a target, and have been for a little while. Sure, Cole is gone, but Emma might still turn the others against me. I think it's the most logical move, though, because as I said to David earlier... [11:12:07 AM] Lily Owen: So, tbh, here’s my hot take on this [11:12:12 AM] Lily Owen: Emma didn’t contribute [11:12:18 AM] Lily Owen: She threw last round [11:12:22 AM] Lily Owen: Do I need to say it

[survivorsentinelislands]

EPISODE 2: YOU HAVE TO LOOK FORWARD TO BE ABLE TO PROGRESS ~Alex

So, I get online at roughly 9 my time, and we’re all talking about social anxiety and depression. It’s a real thing. It is very much so a real thing that hinders people’s day to day lives. However Sara was very interesting with the way she went about it. Logan seemed shocked to find that I actually like my life? I love show choir, I love my girlfriend right now, my friends are fun. My family is supportive.

The way I get through my life is by almost putting myself down? It’s like Fat Amy from Pitch Perfect calling herself Fat Amy, so people can’t do it behind their back. I’m not the most attractive person, I let that be known to everyone. But it’s easier to be open about things in your life because it’s how you handle things. When I actually apply for the show it’s definitely something I am going to talk about. Growing up I didn’t /have/ a whole lot of confidence as a person to get through things. As I got into highschool I really was this awkward shy human being who wasn’t fond of social situations. I was always a quirky person; I felt like people didn’t like being around me a whole lot? That’s weird to say, but it’s hard to go through life feeling like an outcast. When I got into Show Choir my life really changed. My confidence shot through the roof. It was this wake up call for me that “hey, you’re good at stuff. Open up to that part of your life, and quit focusing on the negative.” And I definitely do that and it definitely gets me through the day.

I don’t get sad over a whole lot because it’s real easy for so many people to say “my life sucks, things aren’t going right.” but nine times out of ten there is something. And that’s what I focus on in my life. And that’s why I’m going to get through this game. I’ve learned to not focus on the negative parts of my life and the same goes for this game. You have to look forward to be able to progress. If you’re stuck in the past things won’t work out for you. So this is my way of saying my way of life. It’s weird to put it into a confessional, considering it’s hardly game-topic, but it seemed oddly appropriate.

Okay i take back what i said i actually really connect with logan her and I both share a passion for stories and characters and shes great and like lowkey love my tribe

Dang sh#t I know I’m not winning and now I may be going home just great <_<

The MATT vote off went very well. Although in hindsight it may have been better to vote off ELENA instead of him. She received a self vote which isn’t a great sign at her activity level going forward.

The next immunity challenge is an individual challenge. Three people win immunity and both tribes go to tribal. So I guess it’s not a big deal that ELENA wasn’t voted off last tribal. If we need to, we can just vote her out this one.

After this coming tribal, there will be 15 people left, which opens the opportunity for a tribe swap into 3 tribes of 5. I hope that’s not the case, I don’t really want to be separated from SAM, DARIAN and NED. The four of us have a good thing going, I’d hate to have it end right now. I don’t exactly have a good record with tribe swaps.

I still have my extra vote but in a tribe of a five it wouldn’t exactly be useful. Either we go in 3-2 with majority or minority. An extra vote would only cause a tie and then a loss on the revote.

fuck u n ur confessionals drew

well! i gotta get to work on staying

I smell

I hate feet and Drew’s face

LET’S GET WEIRD

Oh no no no, don’t phunk with my heart

I prefer tea

I like eggs

OK. Well, I got immunity this week in the double tribal and everyone wants to target Elena.. But She has that advantage and I don’t want her to go. this sucks. I don’t know if i should stick my neck out there for her or if i should just bite the bullet and cut my losses. i have no idea what I’m going to do.

I don’t know what these people are talking about!!

The government is whack

BOO! I’m a ghost!

Honestly I asked them for confessionals. I did this. This is my fault.

I’m here for the party

ANYWAY AFTER THAT MEANNESS. I guess we’re voting out Steven? Idk him enough to even try to find someone else goodbye

Super disappointed in how badly our tribe did. I know we’re going to tribal either way, but seeing just how much we got beat by has me worried for future challenges. Hopefully the challenges in the future will be a little different and give us an advantage.

In other news, me, Logan, Alex, John and Josh formed an alliance. We decided that this time the best person to vote out is Steven, because he’s missed way too many challenges and rarely contributes in the tribes conversations. So hopefully he’ll be gone tomorrow.

Bye!

Hi! after we lost the challenge a few official alliances formed. The Bubblegum Bitches with myself, Logan, Daisy, Alex and Josh. It was formed after I found out it was a four person alliance and Daisy added me to it when I asked her about it. Also, the alliance of myself, Alex, and Nehe. I like the two of them but Alex and I have discussed a final 2 already. Steven has not said a single word to me I forgot if I mentioned that but it still holds true!!!11 ok thats all bye

I scream and yell in my host chat and forget I need to put them in the confessional chat.

So I have an alliance with Keegan, Darian, and Ned and it’s super cute or whatever I guess. All three of them won immunity so I guess I’m just here like the loser of the alliance but whatever.

Besides this alliance, I don’t talk to anyone but that’s not for a lack of trying! I literally try to bug everyone all the time and no one answers me! I really like Elijah when he actually answers me but 90% of the time it’s like pulling teeth. Elena AND Brandon didn’t answer me when I said ‘hey’ so now I obviously feel to self-conscious to ever message them again because I don’t want to have to see the double 'hey.’ So I guess I’m just never talking to them again. But I don’t think that’ll matter because Elena is either about to be 1) med evaced or 2) voted out either way. So I just have to worry about Brandon but like I don’t care if we talk or not to be completely honest. I’m just biding my time until a swap because EVERYONE I talked to before we got put into tribes is on that tribe so like that sucks. Hopefully they take pity on me and decide that they want to work with me.

its been a fun game but my time has come

As of now I know I’m on the bottom of my tribe which kinda sucks. Daisy and Logan made an alliance with Alex, John, and Josh and not me. That left me shocked as I thought me and Logan were having good talks. No matter that, Alex and John made an alliance with me telling me about that one. I’m prob their side piece but as long as it keeps me safe I don’t mind. I made an alliance with Stevie as I really like the guy. I need to speak more with Sara so I can align with her but i’m sure daisy got some side thing with her.

I went into the forest night one and received a self vote which i thought still allowed me to vote just have a vote against me. This turns out not to be the case. I can’t vote at all so this scares me. I told Alex and John about it so that they know they can trust me and in the morning I will be telling Stevie so he isn’t blindsided that I didn’t tell him. The plan is to get rid of Steven, he’s the easiest guy to vote out. Right now though I need to move myself into a good spot and not where I stand right now. But yeah my hope is that Steven is the vote. Not me lets hope.

So I got roped into a great alliance including Sam, Darian, and Keegan, and three of us have individual immunity for the next tribal! Unfortunately, Elena hasn’t said a word since the game started, and I’m a little worried she’s not doing too great. However, we’re voting her out because she’s going to be medevaced soon anyway, and we don’t want to lose 3 tribemates before we even swap. At this point in games, I can usually tell about how far I’ll go, but I really don’t have a clue right now. I could be swap boot or I could win. Hopefully I win.

I won immunity, yay! This is my first time ever winning an individual immunity. The other two individual immunities were won by my alliance members NED and DARIAN. No one on the other tribe is safe which means any one of them could be voted off.

The vote tonight is going to be really easy. ELENA hasn’t been around for a while, hopefully she’s alright and just too busy with real life to play the game. As far as I’m aware, everyone is voting for her. It doesn’t really matter though, I’m safe so I’m not worried.

well no ones talking

but i think elenas goin bc shes inact?

[sasuke420]

1-65 except the ones you already did

ok this is A LOT so sorry if you’re on mobile

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

answered

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

answered

3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?

like........unofficially almost 2 years but official a combination of 2 months then 7 or 8 months idfk 

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

i absorb the personality of everyone i ever talk to but like, not intentionally

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA i hope we never speak again or if we do it’s just so i can be like FUCK YOU again tbh,

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

nah

7: Have you ever cheated?

nope

8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?

what the fuck no

9: What's the most important part of a relationship?

umm......communication? trust? all those words people throw out that are true and real but i love being very open at all times so truly communication

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

serious i guess? my last “fling” was kind of a disaster so idk 

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

NOPE NOPE NOPE almost fell for that bullshit and it’s basically what ended my last relationship so absolutely not no thanks!!! not for me

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

i hate the phrase hooked up bc it could mean anything from kissing to sex so i never know how to answer this?! i already made a post the other day sayin ive kissed 4 people so theres that i guess 

13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

answered

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

idk you do you but like, personally before like........16 seems too dangerous imo bc you are Children but as long as it’s safe and whatever idk

15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?

no bc it’s usually used by predatory older dudes but i mean age differences are fine as long as it’s not creepy and terrible. but don’t say this as a 24 year old dude as an excuse to date a high schooler

16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?

answered

17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?

that’s like, exclusively what’s happened to me so, yeah

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

i don’t have like a specific list in my mind or like one THING i cannot tolerate but i guess a huge one would be anything having to do w not tolerating mental illness bc that is my entire personality

19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?

when they make you feel shitty more than they make you feel happy

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

nop

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

yeah i’ve seen it happen and work out fine

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

sure why not, it’s nice to be friends then have it turn into something or whatever. i like relationships based off of friendships 

23: How many relationships have you had?

um i’d really only count like, one, so......1

24: Do you think love can last forever?

yeah i love happy old couples

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

um.......not really??? that’s like, a big statement, 

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?

no because i dated someone my parents disliked for a long time

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

answered

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

absolutely tho i’m not huge on them for myself

29: What do you notice first about another person?

answered

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

me all the time: IM GAY AS HELL

but really i’m bi 

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

answered

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

haha........................................................................................yeah and it’s fucked up my entire psyche so (-:

33: Do you want to get married one day?

yeah!

34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?

sounds like a very bad idea and also wouldn’t even be like aesthetically pleasing so no thanks

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

probably? idk

36: Are you still a virgin?

no i’m a sinner

37: What's more important: Looks or personality?

personality but obviously i like people that i am physically attracted to so.....i mean its both but i am very big on personality which is why hookups arent rly my thing too much

38: Do you enjoy love films?

do i enjoy them? i will SOB at them, so, 

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

nope

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

answered i think

41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?

getting drunk and taking a nap together

42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?

i did for school in like 8th grade 

43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?

gotta get that balance. don’t neglect either of them

44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?

i call myself a hopeless romantic constantly

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

yes

46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?

fake concept. i had high school crushes that never went anywhere but that doesnt mean friendzoned really so no

47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?

i don’t pay attention to thos things honestly................mulder and scully

48: What's your favorite love song?

i have an entire playlist of love songs, hmu for it, but ummm probably first day of my life if thats considered a love song

49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

eh. kind of. complicated

50: If you're single, why do you think you are?

i’m ugly

(bc i have been single for like...2 months and thos things dont come fast)

51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?

poor but nice guy 100%

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

ehhhhhhhhhhhhh not really i mean sometimes? i don’t know it depends on the situation 

53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?

LOL.............yes i am known to get kinda salty

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?

eh. i like having it be Official and known as a thing but other than that idk

55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?

i will cling to you with the force of a thousand suns (but try to play it cool and fail yikes)

56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?

nah he did that (side eye emoji)

57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

me: i’m going to kill myself when we break up

so like, no, but don’t do it because i didn’t and that was a dumbass mindset

58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?

the MOST submissive you will ever meet, in your entire life, please dominate me

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?

answered i think

60: What's your opinion on open relationships?

whatever works for u but probably not my thing

61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?

my siblings can fuck off but parents and partner are both important

62: How do you define "cheating"?

????????? is there more than one definition??? its fuckin cheating. dont flirt or do shit w other people. 

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

it doesn’t make me feel awesome to think about but it’s not like, an issue

64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?

me when im single: yes

me if i was in a relationship: NO (HEART EYES X1000)

65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?

WOULD I? CONSIDER????????????? I DONT CONSIDER ANYTHING. I KNOW FOR A FUCKING FACT I AM. i will cuddle 24/7 365 baby