#cannot wait till exams are over and i have time to catch up

[caswellseyes]

the amount of unread fics i have opened on my phone is seriously getting out of hand

[justash02]

TXT reaction;

Type of soulmates you two are~

Plot; In a world where everyone has soulmates most of the people have different kinds of soulmates qualities.

Find all my k-pop work here -> masterlist

Requests are; open! Please dm me if you have any❤️

A/N: I’m sorry, I know this is shit. But I’m on vacation now and I wanted to write for a bit.

*^*^*

Choi Yeonjun;

Having each other’s first name on the others wrist;

Yeonjun.

He has such a beautiful name, when you turned sixteen his name appeared onto your wrist and you wondered if he thought about your name like you do about his.

You started thinking about what he could possibly be like... was he kind? Active? Maybe introverted? Or maybe very out going?

Does he like drawing? Or is he maybe more into music? What would his eye color be?

You sighed and leaned back against the seat, you looked around the bus and saw it was packed up, the only spot free was next to you. Lucky me, I guess.

You felt the bus coming to a stop as boy who looked around your age walked in, your eyes met his as he smiled. Quickly you grabbed your bag off of the seat next to you and pointed to it for the boy to sit on.

The boy quickly walked over to you as the bus started moving. luckily he came to the spot without tripping and sat down next to you.

A wave of sweet cologne filled your nose making you immediately feel addicted to this boy, you smiled softly at him before turning back to the window.

Even though he seemed nice you always feel like you’re a burden to people, you felt your mark itch, you looked at it before scratching it a bit.

You pouted and just decided to ignore it as the boy next to you probably thought you were a weird person. You could feel his eyes on your mark but didn’t dare to say anything about it.

“I don’t mean to sound rude, but can I ask your name?” His soft voice asked, you looked over at him, his brown eyes looked deep into your soul. You could now tell how pretty he was, he was breath taking.

“Y/n.” As soon as your name rolled of your tongue the boy smiled brightly, “Y/n...” you watched him pull his sleeve up a little bit revealing your own name.

“You’re even more beautiful than I imagined.”

*^*^*

Choi Soobin;

Black stain on you body where your touch skin to skin with your soulmate for the first time;

Even though you knew that some people also had them you still felt insecure about you black mark, the makers were right on your hands which made it seem like your hands were always filthy.

You let out a softly sigh as you grabbed your bag ready to leave the class room, you watched as some people stared at your hands. But come on, it’s normale for your soulmate to touch your hands right?

You decided to just try and cover you hands up, “Heya!” Suddenly you felt two arms wrap themselfs around your shoulder pulling you onto the person, “Taehyun, I seriously cannot breathe.” You puffed out as the boy pouted.

He let’s you go before he linking his arm with yours, “We’re still on for studying later, right? My mom will have my ass if I don’t.” Taehyun said as you walked down the hall to the cafeteria.

“Yes we are, Tae Tae.” He smiled as he softly ruffled up your hair, when you got to the cafeteria it was very crowded.

Because if two reasons, the first one being that the school next to us had a water leak somewhere meaning that the students of that school had to come here.

And second, it was taco tuesday.

You watched as Taehyun tighted his grab onto your hand as walked into the crowd, as childish as it seemes it made you feel safe.

But all of this was a bad idea.

You quickly lost your grip onto Taehyun’s arm as people were knocking into you, you tried to reach out but he was already out of sight.

You inaudible cursed under you breath before scanning the crowd, you soon found Taehyun standing with few boys you’ve never seen, maybe he had make new friends?

You smiled and tried getting through the crowd to your best fiends, when you reached him you quickly grabbed his hand, “I lost you there, Tae Tae.” I said smiling, tae turned around- Wait-! That’s not Tae!

You quickly let go of the boy when you felt a burning pain onto your hands, you let out a yelp as tears started to flow down your face, the pain was too intense. He clapped his other hand around the hand that you touched, hissing in pain.

Soon the dark marks on your hands lit up befor disappearing, can it be..? Slowly you looked up to the handsome stranger who locked eyes with you.

He mindlessly reached over to you and softly whipped away the tears that fell down your face, “I’m not Tae, but don’t think I’ll let him have you that fast.”

*^*^*

Beomgyu;

You get hotter when your near your soulmate, and colder when you’re away. Only touching well cool you down;

You puffed out as you wrapped the scarf around you neck, a warm turtle neck under that and warm pants. You were used to it by now, even while summer you would almost be freezing to death.

While you friends could wear cute clothes you were stuck with the winter stuff, you looked at yourself in the mirror and scrunched up your nose.

*^*^*

“Y/n!” Your friends yelled out, she came running at you with her cute flower dress and hugged you close, “you look cute.” She said as she took the scarf into her hands.

“Don’t lie. I look like a Oempa Loempa.” You said pouting, she rolled her eyes and wrapped her arm around your shoulder. “Well, you remember Soobin?” You nodded.

“Well, he asked if he could bring a friend. So I just said yes.” You nodded, once again. Not knowing what to say to that. Great, another person to warm up to..

Suddenly you felt yourself getting warmer and warmer, you pushed Y/F/N’s arm away and ripped off your scarf.

The heat got even more intense as you watched your friend run to soobin, who you didn’t even notice at first, the boy next to him, seemed to struggle under his winter clothes- Wait... why is he wearing winter clothes in the summer?

“Soobinie! What’s happening to your friend?” Soobin looked over at me before looking back at His friend, “Seems like somebody found their soulmate.” Those words got your attention.

Even though you were dying of the heat that was filling your body you looked up at the boy, his forehead was covered in sweat as he ripped off his own jacket and his scarf followed.

He quickly reached over at you before touching your hand, coldness filled your body, cooling it down. Sighing in relief, you leaned into his touch and hugged him close.

Through his panting from the pain from earlier, he wrapped his arms around your body softly leaning against your head.

“What a great way to meet each other, dont you think?”

*^*^*

Taehyun;

A timer that counts down till you meet your soulmate;

You’ve learned yourself not to look at your timer everyday, why would you if it never changes? Last time you looked it said that you would be having to wait for 5 years.

That was 5 years ago.

You kind of forgot about it? It sound weird but you weren’t all that obsessed with finding your soulmate, yeah, the timer was there but does it mean that just because your soulmates that you truly love that person?

You’ve seen soulmates fall apart, some just don’t fit together like god wants them to. But you’ve also seen people who force themselfs to be with that person while it just doesn’t feel right. And you were not in for that.

“Y/n.” Hyuka whispered, seriously in the middle of a exam? You shot him a glance before returning to your paper. “Y/n, you’ve got to listen, your timer-“

“What did I say about talking?” The teacher spoke, she stood up and walked over to you, “Ma’am, you don’t understand, Y/n, her timer is-“

You frowned, my timer is what? Before you could look the door slammed open, and a red haired boy fell inside. The boy quickly catched himself as he awkwardly smiled at th class.

“Y/n’s timer has reached 00:00...” Hyuka said as he watched the boy, you quickly looked over at your timer and saw indeed that it has reached its end.

You looked up and saw the boy looking at you, you slowly stood up before walking over to the boy. On your way there you felt the most anxious that you have ever felt.

You reached for his hand and saw a 00:00 on his wrist too, a quick shot filled your body, making the both of you jump, you looked at your wrist once again and saw the mark disappeared.

“I made a pretty good impression there, didn’t I?”

*^*^*

Heining Kai;

You can communicate throughout your soulmates mind;

‘I’m so screwed, I didn’t even learn for this test.’You thought as you slapped yourself across the head the teacher gave you a weird look but you didn’t care. ‘I’m so going to fail.’

‘What is your subject about?’ You heard your soulmates sweet voice ran through your mind, you smiled softly; ‘Biology, if you can help me with this I’ll love you even more when I see you.’

‘Hey! I thought you already loved me! I’m pouting, you’re being mean!’

You couldn’t help but giggle softly, ‘I said even more, of course I love you.’

‘Fine, I’ll help.’ You felt yourself smile at his cuteness, he sounded so sweet and always wanted to help you with your struggles.

Soon you got the test and you didn’t know most of the things that were asked, You asked Hyuka the questions and he seemed to know all of them.

You happily turned in the paper and walked out, ‘What school do you go to?’ He asked.

‘You know I can’t tell you, it would be to easy, Hyuka.’

‘Well, I think you’re going to my school, because I just broke into the principal’s office and looked you up.’ That can’t be true.

Suddenly you felt a tap onto your shoulder, quickly you turned around and came face to face but a cute boy.

“You promised to love me more, right?”

[avversiera-writes]

'till death do us part - chapter 1 [tobirama senju/you]

Chapter 1 - Allegiances

Summary: In which Madara leaves the village right after you break the news of your engagement to Tobirama, and you are left with the easiest decision to make. 

Words: 3.4k

A/N: I know I promised to write their meeting, but this whole part of the series just would not LEAVE MY MIND AND SO HERE WE ARE....pls enjoy, and thank you for reading lols. 

Also available in AO3.

If someone were to tell your past self that in the near future, you will end up betrothed to the second Senju brother, you might have laughed at their face and patted the person on their back for the effort of making such a joke. There is  no way that socially inept bastard had managed to woo you and make you fall for him. Sure, you can be flirtatious and you think you can get anyone with your vibrant charms. 

 But to have one of the founding fathers of the very village you reside in fall for you, and you, to reciprocate. There was just  no  way. 

 However, that is your reality now. Here you are, wearing his ring, his promise to you that he will be your companion for the rest of your life. You now have someone who will fight for you just as hard as you will fight for them. You have dreamt of a place to accept and love you, and you have found it in him.

 You have broken the news to Madara first, as he is a good friend of yours, but his reaction was not something you expected. He fell into silence, instead of making fun of you and badmouthing your Senju fiance. That would have been the Madara you knew. 

“Are you happy with him?” Madara asks, his eyes narrowed and somber towards the horizon. He finally breaks his silence after you bring him the news of your engagement. 

 You look towards the horizon as well, trying to determine what Madara is trying to find. You sigh, not liking this Madara, who seems to be dead set on accomplishing whatever he is conjuring up in his mind. You know that he and the Shodaime Hokage have been at odds these days, and with Tobirama, the man you are now betrothed to, being in the middle of the disagreements, a middle ground will not be reached, unless it will benefit the village above all under his terms. 

 You are not privy to what they have been arguing about, though you are sure that it has been about the Hokage seat or their differing opinions of peace. Many years have passed since the village has been established and with it, its leader, but it does not mean that it has been spared by power plays, especially when the village houses many prominent clans. Though, this has been foreseen by Tobirama, since the village is still young. 

 As observant as you are, you try to catch what Madara is thinking about, but the friend and mentor you have known for a long time is gone, and before you, is a stranger. He seems to brood even more than the man you intend to marry. 

Instead, you let his question hang in the air. 

 “You deserve better you know,” Madara reminds you for the hundredth time. 

 “I am happy with him,” you tell him sincerely. “I wouldn’t have said yes.” 

 Madara cracks a small, strained smile at that. “Really? You are smart, considering that marrying into the Senju clan will make sure that you live a prestigious and a comfortable life.” 

 Your face heats up. “Madara, you know that I love him.” You confess and you look down at your sandals which are becoming increasingly more interesting than anything else. “More than I like to admit.”

Madara nods, his face suddenly back to its calculating mask. “Is it too late to change your mind?” His voice is cold and distant, and it makes your stomach curl. "I could show you a whole different world, one where dreams can run wild without pain." 

 You roll your eyes and try for a more light-hearted tone, but it is clear that there is no salvaging this conversation. “My husband-to-be may be a prick, but I know where I stand, heart and mind-wise.” Your forehead wrinkles, still processing what he had just said to you. "I have everything I need and could ever want."

 Madara seems to be disappointed after hearing this from you, but you cannot pinpoint why. You wish that he can just come clean, and you want to reassure him that you will not judge him, but so much time has passed. Whatever Madara has decided, he is determined to follow through it. 

 So you let it be. You let him go. 

“Congratulations. Be happy,” Madara tells you, and he leaves you, just as the sun dips low into the horizon to sleep. “Though you have to remember that you can no longer stay impartial to any sides with him. You side with him, and you are now against me.”

 You turn around to watch him go, and you do not call out to him. You ignore the prick of hurt in your heart from watching his back fade into the shadows.

 You never got to say goodbye. 

//

The days following Madara’s defection were a blur. You are aware of Tobirama hounding around his brother more than usual, and the sudden loss of the Uchiha clan’s leader has the village in uproar. You are left to your own thoughts, replaying your last conversation with Madara and trying to figure out if you could have stopped him, but you knew deep in your heart that Madara is gone, and that whatever you could have said that night would not change a thing. 

You also keep busy with your Genin team, training them so that they can survive the upcoming Chuunin exams. You spar with them, and hone their teamwork until the end of the day, when you have made sure you have tired them out for good. Tomorrow will be the same, but you find yourself unable to look forward to it. Everything has become a chore, even teaching, which you thoroughly enjoy. 

 You feel sorry to your students, but you vow to shake off this stupor by tomorrow. These children deserve better. 

“Go home and rest,” you tell them as the four of you walk out the training ground. “Eat lots of breakfast. Don’t skip it.” 

 Miura Mieko glances at you, a silly grin on her face despite her fatigue. “Congratulations on your engagement to Lord Tobirama, sensei.” 

 The other two, Kai and Taiyo, glanced at each other in surprise. 

You pretend to frown at Mieko. “Wherever did you hear that?” 

 Mieko giggles and elbows you in a friendly way. You let her, since you are not really the formal kind of sensei. “Oh come on, sensei! It’s so obvious! You have a ring! And you two have been making eyes at each other for a while now.” 

You roll your eyes, unable to help the blush creeping up your neck. “Eh…” 

 The three of them offer more enthusiastic congratulations and harmless threats to invite them to your wedding, and when you finally accept and promise to have them attend, your students leave you alone. 

 It did not occur to you how much you immediately needed the noise and the distraction until you are alone with your thoughts, and the sky is darkening, reminding you of Madara and his dark, pensive eyes. You tell yourself that his defection is not your fault, that there are other problems surrounding him that pushed him to his decision, though it feels like you had a hand in it.

 “You let your students talk to you like that?” A familiar, rough voice interrupts your thoughts and you look up to find just the man you have been longing for the past several days. 

Tobirama’s red eyes scan your face, and you stop in front of him, exactly two steps away. 

 You watch his face, trying to reconcile your feelings of your adoration for him and your slight resentment for his politics. You are not unaware of his sentiments towards the Uchiha clan, and a part of you has been wondering whether he had the hand that pushed Madara to his decision. However, this can be easily cleared up through communication. 

Tobirama’s eyes narrow slightly, cluing you in that he knows what you are thinking. “If you are wondering, I did not force Madara to leave. He made that decision himself.” 

 “He was my friend and my mentor,” you say, biting your lip. 

 Tobirama nods. “I know.” 

 You make out the tired lines on his face, and you smile softly. You also know another person who also considers Madara as his friend. “How is your brother?” 

 Tobirama presses his lips together for a moment, and then he sighs tiredly. “He did not take it well. He is in a very depressed state. He blames me.” 

You close the distance between the two of you, and Tobirama almost flinches, but when you take his hand to hold it in yours, he freezes, unsure of what to do. 

 You wait for his response, and your patience is rewarded by a tender squeeze. 

“What about you?” You murmur. “I worry about you.” 

 “I am alright,” he replies evenly, but you know him enough that he is not what he claims to be. His shoulders droop, and his eyes are stormy–a sign of his racing mind. 

 Slowly, so that he can see, you put your hand on his cheek and trace the red stripe that he had tattooed there in his youth with your thumb. “What are you going to do now?”

 Tobirama leans into your touch, and your heart warms at the sight. “Make sure that the village survives this...that my brother gets over it.” 

“You know that I am with you, right?” You remind him. “Whatever it is you do, I will back you up.” 

 Tobirama gives you a small smile, one that lightens up the dark expression of his face. "I am relieved to know that. I know that it is hard for you as well." 

The night finally settles, and the two of you begin to walk to the direction of your apartment. In your silence, you catch glimpses of Tobirama’s face, and you sense that, as always, there is a lot going on in his mind that he can barely speak of. It took years to get closer to him like this, but you are not a mind reader. 

 You have a feeling that this is a lot harder on him, as he sees himself responsible for his brother. Not only does his brother blame him, he also does to himself. 

 Once the two of you get settled in the warmth of your home, Tobirama silently prepares a simple dinner and tea, while you clean yourself up from the day’s work. You hear him move about, and despite your heavy heart, you cannot help imagine that this will be your life with him soon, and that the two of you will be under one roof. 

 Fresh and newly showered, you watch him set up the dining table. Your eyes wander from his broad shoulders and to his rolled up sleeves, and when he catches you looking, you make a beeline towards a chair without making any more eye contact. 

“So,” you begin awkwardly. 

 “So,” Tobirama repeats. Then, he sighs and rakes his hand through his hair. He sets down a plate in front of you and walks towards your window. “Did you know that my brother was going to make Madara the Hokage when this village was first established?” 

You cross your legs and pick up a piece of his cooking. “No.” 

 “I objected,” Tobirama continues and he started to pace, his demeanor agitated. “And instead, pushed for my brother to be the Shodaime.” 

 “And then?”

 “My brother wants Madara to be his successor, and I objected again.” Tobirama stops and he stares at his feet. “I did not force Madara to leave, but I may have played into his decision...but this village will not last if Madara is to rule. He is power-hungry, and he will destroy what we built here. No man with his eyes rooted from the power of strong emotions can ever be Hokage.” 

 You turn away from Tobirama and you close your eyes. You hear Madara’s words to you before he has left, and you realize that they ring true. 

“You may not see it, but Madara is filled with hatred. I will always make decisions that are best for the village, and while I do admit I have been hard on the Uchiha clan, I never once wanted to drive him away from the village. Besides, I do want them in the village, and want them to utilize their abilities so that it benefits it.” 

 “I know my ways have not been agreeable, even to my brother,” Tobirama trails off. “And I am not exactly clean here, either. I did kill Madara’s last brother. If you are angry at me or if you want to blame me, it is okay.” 

You put down your utensils and you walk towards him. You do not care much for politics, but as Madara had told you before, you can no longer stay impartial to any sides as long as you stand with the Senju, and that means the village as well. Madara is no longer part of the village, and though you wished that he had stayed and worked out his differences with Hashirama and Tobirama, the simplest wishes are sometimes the hardest to make come true. 

 “Madara will always be my friend,” you tell Tobirama. “But I do not doubt your intentions for our village. We promised to do everything in our power to keep it safe.”

Tobirama watches you, hesitant to come closer. 

 “I do not resent you, if that is what you’re thinking.” Your lips curve up to show that you mean it. “If you are looking for ways to make me turn away from you, then you will have to try harder than that.” 

Tobirama releases a breath that you know he has been holding. 

 “Is that why you’re trying to explain yourself to me this way?” You question, raising an eyebrow. “By telling me you are a killer?” You lower your voice. “Tobirama, who isn’t a killer here? Even I have shed blood.” 

Tobirama flinches when you put your hands on his face. He looks down, but you catch his gaze as quickly as he evades you. 

“You were at war, and now there is peace,” you tell him. “I know you feel responsibility for your brother’s feelings.”

 “He hates me.”

 “He will never hate you. You are his brother and his trusted advisor.” 

Tobirama’s forehead wrinkles. 

 "Just because your brother is mad at you, does not mean you have to make me mad at you too. Stop trying to make the people around you hate you." 

 "That may be the only way to do things around here. It makes the hardest decisions easier to carry."

"Stop," you plead with him. "Tobirama, I do not blame you." 

 “Why?” Tobirama queries, his eyebrows raising in suspicion. “I do not believe that you are agreeing with me just because we are to be wedded.” 

 You drop your hands from his face and take a deep breath. “Because I knew him. Because I knew that Madara had made his resolve that night. He said goodbye to me on the night he left.” 

 Tobirama peers at the window and stares at the moon hanging low above the village rooftops. “For what it is worth, I really did not know he intended to leave.” 

 You hear the tone of apology in his voice, and that is as good as it gets. “Me too.” 

You share a moment of silence, letting your conversation change its course. You are relieved that you two manage to talk out your feelings and find that your point of views are quite similar, but you are aware that there are other things on Tobirama’s mind. You know that he cares a lot more than he lets on, and you can only wait and see what he does to show it. 

You do not blame him, because you still feel guilty towards Madara, for not taking the time to know what he meant to do, or to ask what he was thinking. 

 Tobirama clears his throat, and you turn your head towards him. “It will only get harder with me, from here on out. I would like you to be by my side, but you must be aware that there are difficulties packaged alongside my presence.” 

 “You underestimate me too much, Senju Tobirama,” you smirk. “I am quite tired of that.” 

 “You can still walk away,” Tobirama’s face schools into a more neutral expression, but you know that this is him preparing for any kind of rejection from you.

You place your hand on his arm and squeeze it gently. “There is no place I would rather be other than to be by your side.” 

 Tobirama's breath catches and he looks away from your gaze. The tips of his ears are pink, indicating that he has grown shy. It is not like your answer will be different, but sometimes, Tobirama has a tendency to think that he does not deserve to receive any affection from you. He usually inches away when you have taken a step closer, never certain how to react. Here is a man who has made so many decisions without as much as a blink of an eye, but he becomes flustered in front of you and gets surprised when you offer him your hand, or kiss his cheek. 

 "What?" Tobirama grunts out, sounding irritated than he means to be. 

 You duck your head away to hide your smile. "Nothing." 

 Tobirama sighs. "You're making fun of me."

 "How do you know? You're not a mind-reader."

 "Yes, but I can usually deduce what a person is thinking." Tobirama crosses his arms and he scowls. "Stop taking my confessions lightly. You have already laughed at me when I asked for your hand. Do you intend to laugh at me at the altar when we are about to be wedded?"

  You giggle. "What are you so wind up for?" You lean closer into his space, and the smirk fades from your mouth. Your eyes narrow, and in an act of courage, you grab his collar to pull him closer to your face. 

 Tobirama's eyes widen for a fraction, and then they harden immediately. His jaw tightens, and his shoulders tenses up. "Stop being ridiculous."

 However, Tobirama does not pull away. He stays still, and the rest of his body flexes tightly in order to hold his current position of towering over you.

 "But we haven't even gotten to the best part yet," you murmur, and you feel yourself drawn towards his lips. "You cannot even gain an inch when I become serious."

  Even though you had the confidence to act this way, you cannot help but feel your heartbeat in your fingertips. The anticipation of his next move makes you light-headed, and again, you wait patiently. 

 "That is because you never let me," Tobirama surrounds an arm around your waist and embraces you against his body. 

 You reach for the elegant arch of his eyebrow and gingerly trace it with a smile, and then, you meet his eyes to hold his gaze. 

  If someone were to tell you that the man before you was the one who won your heart, you would have gotten a kick out of that, but here is your reality. Despite your disagreements from time to time, the both of you had always prized the village more than anything, and you trust that Tobirama’s will is in a good place. 

 Madara may have been right about one thing, but you see a great man who has the ability to make dreams happen, who will stop at nothing to ensure that there are fallbacks to setbacks, who does as he says because he has weighed every possible outcome that can go wrong. 

He is the man who has made your dreams come true and has shown up time after time to prove that he is there to hold up his promises. Of course, you have chosen him, and you do not see yourself changing your mind. 

To be continued...

Chapter 2 - Union >>

buy me a coffee !

[bleedinghearthalstead]

SWAT!Jay / Upstead AU

A/N: Enjoy part 4! Crossposted on AO3. I’m also kinda hitting a wall, so feel free to suggest something you’d like to see in this universe :)

"Jay's at Med. Apparently he got injured during training." She sighs. "It's probably nothing, otherwise they would've called, but he can be a really lousy patient and he's gonna insist on checking himself out AMA."

Hank nods in understanding. "Not the first time?"

She sighs again, then rolls her eyes and confirms. "Not the first time."

"Target's name is Nathan Wilkins, 34 years old, served five years at Stateville for aggravated assault and armed robbery, recently paroled and eager to go back for another stint. Uniforms picked up his former cell mate James Warner yesterday after he was caught at a routine traffic stop with C4 and body armor in his trunk. Warner shared on his own volition that he and Wilkins were planning on hitting an underground money laundering operation in Pilsen-"

"Shit." All eyes turn to Hailey, who is frowning at her phone.

"Anything you want to share with class?" Adam asks, who was in the middle of his debrief, before Hailey's exclamation interrupted him.

"Sorry, keep going," she mutters, but she doesn't look up from her phone, quickly typing a reply, her expression sour.

Adam frowns. "Everything alright?"

"Yes, it's just-" She stops herself. "No, I'm sorry, I need to go." Hailey stands up from her seat on her desk, grabs her jacket off her chair and briskly walks off.

This is absolutely unusual behavior coming from Hailey, so Hank steps in and calls to her, "Detective Upton." Hailey skids to a halt before she reaches the stairs. "My office, now." Her sergeant's tone doesn't leave any room for discussion, but she also really doesn't have time for this, so she hurries into Hank's office, waiting impatiently for him to follow her. The whole team watches silently as their sergeant steps into his office after her and closes the door behind him. "Do you want to tell me what this is about?"

Hailey is fidgeting, not looking him in the eye. "I just really need to go right now. I'll be back soo-"

"Hailey," Hank snaps at her. "What is going on?"

She flinches slightly at his sharp tone. "Uhm, Jay's at Med. Apparently he got injured during training." She sighs. "It's probably nothing, otherwise they would've called, but he can be a really lousy patient and he's gonna insist on checking himself out AMA."

Hank nods in understanding. "Not the first time?"

She sighs again, then rolls her eyes and confirms. "Not the first time."

The older man nods again. "Go." At Hailey's hesitation, he repeats, "I said 'go'."

"Thanks, Hank," she says gratefully. "I'll be back in a couple of hours." With that, she rushes out the door, her team mates watching her in various degrees of confusion.

She only hears Hank's loud "Get back to work, people!" behind her.

* * * * *

When she gets to Gaffney, Jay is sitting on an exam bed and a nurse is sitting across from him. She is in the middle of putting a cast on Jay's left hand. Jay is wearing green gym shorts and a ratty grey Army t-shirt that he likes to wear when he works out. There's some new scrapes and bruises on his arms and legs, but he doesn't look any worse for wear.

As soon as he sees Hailey, he groans. "Who called you?"

Seeing with her own eyes that her husband is in fact fine, Hailey rolls her eyes at him. "Mitch texted me. He said you broke your hand when you fell off the cargo net."

"Mitch and his big mouth, I swear," Jay mutters, then indignantly says, "and I didn't 'fall'. Mitch and his fucking massive clown feet stomped on my hand, so it's his fault, and then my foot got caught in the net when I fe-" He stops himself before he finishes the word.

"Fell and landed on your hand?"

Jay continues his rant. "-and the coward doesn't even show up here himself, he calls-"

"Texted."

"-my wife!" He fumes. "Wait till I get my hands on fucking Bigfoot-"

Hailey walks up to him and puts her hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down so the nurse can finish her task without him moving around agitatedly. "You done?"

Jay deflates as soon as Hailey touches him. "Yes."

Hailey nods. "What did the doctor say?"

"Heeeeeyyy," comes from the door of the exam room, "if it isn't my favorite sister-in-law!"

Jay shakes his head while Hailey smiles and hugs the red-headed doctor that is her second-favorite Halstead. "Will, haven't seen you in a while."

"Well, I wish I saw you more often." He turns to Jay and pointedly looks at his broken hand that is being wrapped in bright white plaster. "At least I wish I saw less of this tire fire of a human being." Will anticipates his brother's reaction and narrowly dodges Jay's swing at him.

"Fuck off," the younger Halstead grumbles.

Hailey ignores their antics. "Is he going to be alright?"

"Yeah." Will walks up to the light box on the wall and points out the break or rather breaks on Jay's x-ray. "He broke the metacarpal bones of his left index and middle fingers, but they're clean breaks and the fractures are lined up, so they should heal without problem. He's gonna have the cast for at least three weeks-" Jay groans. "-and the doctor will determine at the check-up if he can have the cast removed. He'll probably have to wear a splint for another three weeks afterwards."

Jay rubs his healthy right hand over his face. "Six weeks!?" Hailey looks at Jay with a pained expression – this isn't going to be pretty. Her husband can get very restless when he cannot be physically active.

Will just rolls his eyes. "This isn't the first time you've broken your hand, this shouldn't be news to you."

"Again, fuck off."

"Well, stop breaking your damn hand."

Before the urge to slap them both upside the head gets too much, the only reason stopping her being that Jay is currently being treated at the hospital, Hailey quickly shuts down their bickering. "Guys, that's enough." She swears that the brothers are worse than her two nephews who are still in kindergarten.

"I'm all done now, Officer Halstead," the nurse announces and the two men at least look a little bit embarrassed that they had an unwitting audience.

Jay and Hailey thank the nurse and Will smiles at her apologetically. "Yeah, thanks, Lisa."

"No problem, Dr. Halstead."

As soon as the nurse is out of the room, Jay hops off the bed. "We done here?" He holds up his newly casted hand and looks at it in disdain.

Will nods. "You know the drill, be careful with the cast for a day or two until it's fully dried out, don't get the cast wet-"

"And don't stick anything down the cast, blah-di-blah." His older brother rolls his eyes at him. He and Hailey both know that Jay is terrible at that last bit, the itch usually the first thing that drives him mad.

"Here's a prescription for some pain medication." Will hands the note to Hailey and Jay just gives him the side eye.

Hailey reads over the prescription and it's just over-the-counter pain relievers that she doubts Jay is willing to take, but she'll make him take some later, whether he wants to or not. She notices that Jay is getting antsy, so she tries to wrap up their visit to Med as quickly as possible. "I gotta get back to work, let's get you home, huh?" Jay eagerly nods and they say their goodbyes to Will. "Will, why don't you come over to the house after your shift, watch the Blackhawks game with us?"

"Sure, why not."

All three of them know that this is code for 'keep Jay company in case Hailey can't get away from work'.

* * * * *

As soon as they get in the door of their house, Jay toes off his sneakers and walks straight into their living room, plopping down on the couch. Kicking up his feet on the coffee table and leaning back against the cushions, he lets out a relieved sigh. Hailey walks through to the kitchen and gets a glass of water, then hands two pills to Jay.

"Drink up." Jay grimaces at the pills that she dropped in his right hand, so Hailey adds, "It's just Advil."

"Fine," he huffs and pops them in his mouth, washing them down with the water that he takes from Hailey. Satisfied, she takes the glass back from him and goes to refill it, leaving it on the coffee table next to Jay's feet.

"Do you want to shower?" At Hailey's question, Jay looks down at himself. His grey shirt is stained with sweat and dirt. He pulls up the collar and sniffs, wrinkling his nose. He did run five miles and was on his second lap of the obstacle course when Mitch had not so gracefully squashed his hand and caused his fall. His wife nods before he says anything. "Come on, I'll help."

Jay sighs, but gets up and they walk upstairs together. He heads straight for the bathroom. Hailey disappears and comes back with a plastic bag and tape. While she was gone, Jay took off his shirt and shorts and is waiting for her in only his boxer briefs. All of her attention is on something else though. There is a huge red and purple bruise on the left side of his torso.

He catches her staring. "Nothing's broken, Ethan checked."

She tilts her head at him. "Anything else I need to know about?"

"Just my bruised ego," Jay laments. "The guys won't ever let me live that down."

"You sure you didn't hit your head too?" She sticks out her tongue at him.

"Ha ha, really funny."

Hailey takes the plastic bag and puts it over his cast, fixing it with tape. She nods at the shower. "You start and I'll help you with your right arm and back." Jay nods and then drops his boxer briefs. After she watches him step into the shower and close the curtain, she busies herself with grabbing his dirty clothes from the floor and throwing them in the hamper, then goes to their bedroom and comes back with a fresh t-shirt, boxers and sweatpants, the bathroom now steaming up.

Jay is standing under the hot water spray, his left fingertips hanging on to the curtain rail so his left hand is raised over his head. He is gingerly rubbing a wash cloth over his left side when the shower curtain opens behind him and he hears Hailey's voice, "Here, let me do the rest."

He hands her the wash cloth and winks at her. "Don't get wet." Hailey rolls her eyes.

"Turn your back to me and lift your right arm up a little," she directs him, then proceeds to carefully scrub his right arm and back, mindful not to put too much pressure on his injured side. She then motions for Jay to hand her the detachable shower head and rinses his back. When she is finished, she kisses him in the middle of his back. "All done."

He turns around and smiles when his wife hands him a towel. Leaning in, he gives her a soft kiss. "Thanks, babe." Before Jay can pull away, Hailey puts her hand on the back of his head and deepens the kiss, her fingers playing with the wet hair at the nape of his neck. When Hailey breaks away too soon, for Jay's taste anyways, he pouts. Hailey gives him a quick peck in apology, then sighs, "I really need to get back to work."

He is still pouting when he starts drying himself off, but then he quietly says, "You really didn't have to come to the hospital, I know you're busy." And it isn't like he didn't want her there, he always wants her by his side, but it really wasn't that bad and he swears he would've called her as soon as he was home.

"Just next time, text me yourself." Jay looks confused. "Or tell Mitch to text in full sentences. His first message just read 'Jay's at the hospital' and then he didn't reply for ten minutes."

"Fuck's sake." He pinches the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine, I just got worried and by the time Mitch texted me back saying that you broke your hand, I was already on the way."

Jay kisses Hailey once more. "Again, I'm sorry. And I'm gonna smash Mitch's phone."

"Good." Hailey giggles, then throws the pair of boxers at Jay's face. "Now put on some clothes, lover boy."

* * * * *

Back at the district, the team is setting up for a raid of Wilkins' house. Hank pulls her to the side before she can go down to the basement to prepare her gear with the rest of the unit. "All good?"

Hailey gives her sergeant a small smile. "Yeah, he's fine. Thanks for letting me go."

Hank grunts and nods. "I'm sure that broken hand won't stop him for very long." With that, he walks off.

Hailey never figures out how the hell he knew that Jay broke his hand.

* * * * *

Bonus:

It's after 10 p.m. when Hailey gets back home, so the hockey game is already over. When she enters the living room, Jay and Will are lounging on the big sofa, Jay's left arm propped up on a pillow in his lap. They are watching reruns of The Simpsons and there's dirty dishes and beer bottles littering the coffee table. Figures. She is about to tell them off, but then she hears a noise coming from the kitchen.

"Hey, babe." Jay turns away from the TV to look at her and gives her a soft smile. He looks tired but relaxed. Again, there's a clanging sound, followed by a low curse. "Mitch made an apology lasagna."

She is greeted with the sight of a big burly man wearing her flowery chef's apron. "Oh hey, Hailey." Mitch looks at her nervously. "There's some leftover lasagna in the kitchen for you. I made sure the boys didn't eat the whole thing." He's gesturing for her to take a seat (or to not come into the kitchen?). "Sit down, I'll warm it up for you!"

Mitch scurries away and Hailey gives Jay a pointed look when he snorts. "What did you do?"

Jay points at himself with an innocent smile, which is obviously and totally fake. "Me? Nothing. Mitch is just really sorry he upset you with his texts today."

Hailey rolls her eyes, but steps over Jay's feet that are stretched out in front of him, then drops down on the couch between him and Will. She snuggles into Jay's right side and he slips his arm over her shoulders. She leans up and gives him a chaste kiss. "How's the hand?"

Her husband raises the offending object and turns his arm. There's already a SWAT sticker adorning the damn thing. "Sucks, but I'll live."

Mitch comes back with a massive and steaming hot piece of lasagna and puts it on the coffee table in front of Hailey, clearing away the dirty plates and bottles. He hands her cutlery and a napkin. "Thanks, Mitch."

"I'm really sorry, Hailey," he blurts out. Will and Jay try but fail to hold back their laughs. Hailey glares at both of them.

"It's okay, Mitch. It's not your fault Jay is so accident prone." Mitch lets out his breath, relieved. Will snort laughs and Jay punches him in the arm behind Hailey's back.

"Babe, that's harsh," Jay complains. Hailey just smirks at him and digs into her lasagna.

[purplesurveys]

1149

A

What is your age? 22, but there’s less than a month to go before I turn 23.

What annoys you? Literally every single person who still supports the government at this point. For context, we are back to square one and we’re under the exact same quarantine imposed in March 2020 because of the surge in cases. Nothing has changed and nothing has been done in the last 365 days while people are getting hungrier and poorer. I’m done feeling hopeful for this country and I cannot wait to abandon it forever.

Do you have any allergies? Apparently, grass. Can’t be exposed to it for too long otherwise the skin on my thighs turn red and occasionally even get rashes.

B

Do you know anyone named Billy? Kind of, but they’re girls with their name spelled as Billie.

When is your birthday? April 21st and spending it in quarantine once again this year...

Who is your best friend(s)? Angela and Andi.

C

What's your favorite candy? I like gummy bears and worms. As for sweets, I really like Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, Butterfinger, Twix, and the Hershey’s Cookies and Creme bar.

When was the last time you cried? Maybe a day or two ago while watching a snippet from Caught in Providence.

Have you been out of the country? Yes.

D

Do you daydream? Not so much these days. I’ve been better at keeping my focus at work.

What's your favorite kind of dog? I love alllllll dogs, but I’d usually be wary of smaller dogs because 87% of the times I’ve met some, they’re aggressive or a bit moody. I don’t like stereotyping dogs as much as possible but because I’ve had direct experiences to back it up anyway, *shrug*

What day of the week is it? It’s a Sunday.

E

How do you like your eggs? Scrambled, poached, or an omelette with lots of fillings. Balut is also great.

Have you ever been in the emergency room? Only when I was born, I’m guessing.

What's the easiest thing ever to do? Idk, what comes easy to me might not be the same for others. But my answer would be to smile, regardless if it were genuine or otherwise.

F

Have you ever flown in a plane? Yeah, many times. The child-like excitement I get whenever I get on one will probably never go away, either.

Do you use fly swatters? No, my mom usually uses old shoebox covers or rolled-up scratch papers we have lying around to swat them.

Have you ever used a foghorn?: Only in video games lol, never in real life.

G

Have you pet a goat? I don’t think I have. I’ve pet lots of animals before but I don’t think a goat has been one of them yet.

Are you a giver or a taker? Giver, but I’ve been allowing myself to take more these days.

Do you like gummy candies? Love them.

H

How are you? We’ve entered summer weather now, so I feel hot and miserable. It’s also Sunday and I am stuck at home, which doesn’t make me the happiest camper.

What's your height? 5′1″ or a tiny tiny tiny bit taller than that.

What color is your hair? It’s black but on extremely rare occasions I’ll catch a single light brown strand when I play with my hair.

I

What's your favorite ice cream? Cookies and cream and chocolate chip cookie dough. My friend Leigh actually started her own ice cream shop recently and I bought her coffee crumble ice cream, and it is sooooooooo fuckinggggggggg good??????? It’s so rare to find coffee ice cream where I live period, so I’m fucking stoked to have a close friend who makes literally the best one and in generous servings too.

Have you ever ice skated? Many times as a kid. I was never formally trained, but it was something I wanted to try from watching other kids play in mall ice skating rinks; and when I did give it a shot, I ended up enjoying it. Luckily my mom was encouraging and actually frequently dropped me off at a rink so I can practice gliding and all for a few hours while she ran errands.

Have you cheated the IRS? That’s like an American tax thingy, right? We don’t have that here and my employer handles my TIN.

J

What's your favorite jelly bean? Not a big fan but if I had to have Jelly Belly, I obviously would want to get the pleasant-tasting ones.

Do you tell jokes? Yes.

Do you wear nice jewelry? Only on special occasions.

K

Do you want to kill anybody? I don’t want to kill anybody but I certainly wish a good number of public officials would finally die.

Do you want to have kids? Yes. I really wish I could still have a future with them. Thanks for the trauma, my real asshole of an ex.

Where did you have kindergarten? Somewhere.

L

Are you laidback? I doubt my friends would use this to describe me. I for sure lean more towards the uptight side of the spectrum.

Do you lie? Eh, occasionally.

When is the last time you sent a hand-written letter? I have no idea. Christmas 2019 maybe?

M

Ever talked in a microphone? Sure. Many times.

Do you still watch Disney Movies? I very rarely get in the mood for them if I’m by myself, but yes, I’d gladly sit down and watch should an opportunity come.

Do you like mangoes? No.

N

Do you have a nickname? 99% of people call me Robyn while my family calls me Byn, but there are a select few friends who’ve stayed long enough with me to catch other names I’ve gotten over the years, which have since become inside jokes/nicknames. There’s Reben and Rolayn, and literally just yesterday ‘Roby’ happened when I ordered food for lunch so that will probably catch on as well.

What’s your favorite number? 4.

Do you prefer night over day? Absolutely.

O

Are you an only child? No, I’m two siblings away from that status.

Do you wish this was over? I haven’t felt that way, no.

What is the closet orange object near you? An orange tumbler my Kuya gave me as a Christmas gift in 2019. There is also orange tape wrapped around the charger adaptor of my company laptop.

P

What one fear are you most paranoid about? Waking up in the middle of surgery and being unable to speak nor move.

Do you play any instruments? Nope.

Do you think you are pretty? Some days.

Q

Are you quick to judge people? No, unless they are already blatantly showing their character like being rude towards service staff, tossing their trash to the ground, or cutting in queues. Whenever those things happen I give myself the space and freedom to guiltlessly judge.

What do you keep quiet about? How dysfunctional my family really is, and the things I really want to say about Gabie.

Do you have any quirks? Food-wise, I like peeling off the breading from fried chicken and placing them on the side of my plate so I can eat them last, because they’re my favorite part.

R

What’s a good reason to cry? Frustration. Crying can be really helpful in lessening stress.

Do you think you're always right? No.

Do you watch reality TV? Not religiously, but I love watching snippets of reality shows on Facebook because they’re all so embarrassing and it’s hilarious to watch hahahahah. Literally last night I was watching clips of Big Ed on 90 Day Fiance.

S

Are you a social person? More so now than I was years ago.

What states have you lived in? I lived in Manila briefly but it didn’t take long till we transferred to another city for a more peaceful life in the suburbs.

What is your favorite season? I wanna say winter because of what I’ve seen from it in movies and shows, but I’ve never actually experienced it before.

T

When did you last sleep in a tent? Sometime in March or April last year.

Do you like tomatoes? Mostly in diced form. Tomato sauce is fine but I don’t really like it in my pasta. Bloody Mary also tastes rather awful.

What time did you wake up? 8:30 AM.

U

Do you have an umbrella in your car? I think so, yeah. I finally placed one in there lmao.

Do listen to Usher? Eh, not really. 2000s R&B isn’t my thing, save for Beyoncé.

Describe the underwear your wearing? It’s light blue.

V

What’s the worst veggie? I never learned to like pechay. I’d still eat it, but only because I like cleaning up my entire plate.

Do you like movies with violence? Some. Like I hate action movies but I enjoyed A Clockwork Orange and Scream lol.

Where do you want to go on vacation? I recently bookmarked an Airbnb in Zambales and the accommodation is basically this super cute line of tipi-styled huts by the beach. I'd love to have a solo trip push through once this Covid mess subsides.

W

Ever been on a wave runner? No.

Where do you work? I work in a PR company.

Do you wish on stars? Just sometimes.

X

Have you ever had an x-ray? Only for mandatory medical exams.

Do you own a xylophone? I think I had a toy one as a kid, but it’s not with me anymore.

Have you watched the x-games? No, not interested.

Y

What did you do yesterday? I stayed at home; ordered food for Angela as a surprise; debated if I should buy a pair of Air Maxes – and ultimately decided I’ve already spent too much this month to deserve a new pair of shows lol; and just settled to buy a new night lamp for my bedroom. I also watched the newest episode of 2 Days 1 Night and ate more of Leigh’s ice cream while doing work.

Do you like the color yellow? Only in mustard yellow. I also like the song Yellow, heh.

What year were you born?: 1998.

Z

Do you believe in the zodiac? No.

Has your bank account been at zero? No. I remember when I was first opening my own account at the bank and the clerk told me to make sure I don’t go below P2,000, and my intensely by-the-book ass has been following the rule ever since, even though my dad has told me it’s absolutely fine to go below it so long as I have P2,000 back in the account after a month hahaha.

Ever been to the zoo? A few.

[under-the-blue-sun]

come through (‘cause I just want to be with you) - chapter two

story summary: Dan is half-angel half-demon whose parents sent him to earth to try and live a normal life when he turned 18. In doing this, he lost any power he had, if proven he could live among them normally. The only rule? He couldn’t fall in love with a mortal. Fast forward 5 years later, just before his 23rd birthday, when things go downhill once he meets a barista in a coffee shop who he befriends and falls for.

story word count: 2759

rating: teen & up audiences

warnings: profanity

song of the chapter:  black sun - death cab for cutie

note: i know this is late but in my defense i'm gay and i can't count. i hope you enjoy this chapter!! also on another note isn’t the new tumblr font just terrible

link to ao3 | link to first chapter on tumblr

Chapter Two: how could something so fair (be so cruel)

Beep. Beep. Beep.

 Dan groaned, slamming the button on his alarm to stop the blaring noise. His bleary eyes squinted at the clock.

 “11. That’s okay,” he muttered, hiding under his blankets to stop the persistent pain in his stomach, as if his body was reminding him he should be somewhere.

 He suddenly rose from the covers.

 “10. Lecture. Fuck.”

 He leapt up, clearing his blurry thoughts from his mind, and ran to the bathroom, shoving a bottle of Listerine down his throat. Choking with disgust, he grabbed the first clothes on the floor to throw on, and sprinted out the door, black Muse tote bag stumbling out of his careless hands. Barely catching his breath, he staggered into the lecture room one hour and forty-five minutes late, seemingly unnoticed. He slipped into the back seat, laying out his notebook, pencil case and laptop.

 “Rough morning, huh?” Chris whispered.

 “It was actually a very good morning, until I woke up and realised I was one hour late for the lecture,” Dan whispered back.

 Chris sniggered. “I’ll bet.”

 Chris was one of the very few humans who Dan could talk to without seeming like a fool, mostly because Chris was very rather odd himself. Most people in his philosophy class were aesthetic, intelligent and very pretentious, but Chris made sure he was never two of those things at once. He was the person who introduced him to most of the human things he likes now, and has unknowingly helped Dan slip into human society very well.

 Dan glanced at Chris’ notes. “Anything important?”

 “It’s a philosophy class. Nothing is important, Dan,” Chris said. “I’ll give you the notes after, asshole.”

 “Rude. Exam’s on Monday, right?” Dan said.

 “Yeah, and the hand-in essay’s due before 12pm Wednesday.”

 Dan sighed. “Well, fuck. I better listen.”

 Chris wriggled closer to Dan, assuming his tea-spilling posture. “Have you-”

 “Shut up!” Dan hissed. 

 Chris rolled his eyes, slouching back into the chair, and resumed his note-taking for the last fifteen minutes of class before they were dismissed. 

 “Oh, hurry up. I have something to show you,” Chris said.

 “I haven’t had my morning coffee yet, please cut me some slack.” Dan yawned, slowly placing his items in his tote bag.

 “That’s what I was going to show you,” Chris replied. “Hurry up!”

 Dan finally finished putting his stationery away, and shoved his pencil in his pocket approximately five minutes later, after around one hundred carefully-crafted insults from Chris. “I’m done, what do you want to show me?”

 “I have found the best coffee shop in the entirety of London,” Chris announced, heading out of the lecture room. Dan raised his eyebrows.

 “I highly doubt that,” Dan said.

 “Okay, maybe it’s not the best. But the baristas?” Chris blew a kiss into the air.

 Dan shook his head, disappointed. “Chris, what did I say about objectifying people?”

 “Please, come. It’s called ‘Never Gonna Give Brew Up’,” Chris said, looking at Dan expectantly. Dan stared back, expressionless.

 “You know, like Never Gonna Give You Up?” Chris hinted.

 “Yes, I understand the joke. You keep sending me links to the music video.”

 Chris laughed. “Wait, you actually click on them?”

 Dan scoffed. “Of course not. I memorized the several URLs you’ve sent so I recognise it straight away. I also tend to distrust every link you send.”

 “As you should. Anyway, I am begging you to come. There’s one especially cute boy who I know works today, and I also know he’s very single. His name is Jack, and he is absolutely adorable.”

 Dan continued walking, making no response. 

 “Dan. You’re single, sad, very gay and very lonely. Just ask him out, go on a date, see how it is,” Chris begged.

 Dan snorted. “Like your love life is perfect.”

 “Hey, I may not have a long-term partner, but at least I’m going on dates and meeting up with people. In all the four years I’ve known you, I’ve never seen you go on a single date unprompted.”

 Dan shrugged. “Haven’t found the right guy.”

 “Come on. Just come to the coffee shop, at least,” Chris pleaded.

 “Fine,” Dan said, deciding to humour Chris. “I’ll meet the barista.”

 ---

 Jack the barista was, in fact, very hot, just like Chris stated. They were definitely not the first people to notice that. There was a whole clump of people in the cafe hovering around him, eager for him to give them a chance, or a glance. It was ridiculous.

 “This is ridiculous,” Dan muttered, turning to leave. “I’m going to get out of here.”

 Chris grabbed his arm. “I’m not letting you leave, Howell.”

 Dan groaned as Chris pushed him back in the line and started ordering the food.

 “I didn’t come here to ogle at the resident hoe,” Dan whispered violently in his ear. “I am leaving.”

 “What did you just call me?”

 Dan froze, and looked to the unfamiliar voice that came from in front of him. 

 “Resident hoe. Don’t take it personally. I’m sure you’re a lovely person, I’m just lashing out and name-calling because my friend here is trying to set me up with you. I apologise.”

 Jack smirked in amusement. “At least let the resident hoe get you some coffee. You look like you haven’t slept in years.”

 “Probably because I haven’t,” Dan admitted. “And not in a sexy way.”

 Jack snorted, and handed Dan a drink. “I think this coffee has the most caffeine which you can possibly stuff in a drink.” 

 “Sorry for calling you the resident hoe,” Dan said, turning to go.

“Well, if you want to make a full apology, I’ll be here tonight as well,” Jack said. “Opening hours till midnight.”

 Dan grinned. “I’ll think about it.”

 ---

 “I cannot believe you won him over by calling him a resident hoe,” Chris said, as they were leaving the cafe.

 “What were you picturing?” Dan asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

 Chris shrugged. “I don’t know. Not that. But hey, it worked! And you have another chance to actually talk to him tonight. You are going back there tonight, right?”

 Dan clicked his tongue. “I’m thinking about it.”

 “You better go,” Chris warned. “He literally invited you back to the cafe. You’re not gonna get that chance again.”

 Dan glanced at his watch. “Well, I have approximately twelve whole hours to think about whether I should go back to the cafe to call Jack names, so that’s plenty of time to think. That’s philosophy, right? Thinking about stuff.”

 Chris sighed. “Yeah. You should probably head to the library to revise right now.”

 ---

 Dan looked up helplessly at his blank word document. He had been in the library for three whole hours, yet he had written absolutely nothing. He stared at the blinding white of his screen, mind completely empty. Frankly, he was incredibly amazed at his brain for managing to not have a single thought yet also have too many thoughts. Slowly and helplessly, he began to type random things that came to his brain.

 Are immortal people allowed to fall in love with human beings?

 Dan paused, then pressed the enter button.

 No.

 why?

 because theyll probably find out?? that you’re a demon angel fuckin thing whatever also theyll die before u and thats like sad idk yeah

 Dan sighed. A+ essay right there. 

 The thing is, he kind of really wanted to go on that date with Jack. He seemed like a nice guy. It would be kind of fun. Besides, it would really shut Chris up and he wouldn’t pester him for a few months. 

 It wasn’t like he was going to marry Jack, after all. Like, he was pretty much the resident hoe. 

 Dan sighed deeply. 

 But if an immortal person went to a cafe with the possibility of going out with someone who was not going to be a potential future partner, would that be wrong?

 After a long pause, Dan began to type again.

 No.

 And with that, he gave up on his essay, packed up his bags and left the library.

 ---

 Surprisingly, Never Gonna Give Brew Up was still open, and very brightly lit. Dan didn’t really know why he was surprised. He was told that it closed at midnight, after all. But still, he didn’t normally associate open cafes with dark evenings. He swung the door open and stepped inside with a wide grin.

 “Hey J-” Dan paused. “You’re not Jack.”

 The barista at the counter looked up from his screen with a smirk. “Astute observation.”

 Dan stepped carefully in the cafe, closing the door behind him to make sure it didn’t slam. The barista was watching him carefully, smirk still planted on his irritatingly handsome face. Dan was seriously beginning to think the only qualification for applying to this cafe was to be good-looking.

 “Well. This is awkward,” Dan said.

 The barista shrugged. “For you, maybe. For me, this is rather entertaining. Tell me, what service were you wanting from Jack? I’m guessing it’s not coffee.”

 Dan snorted. “Well, it’s a long story.”

 “Is it?” the barista said, raising an eyebrow.

 Dan thought over it. “Not really. I called him the resident hoe and I came here to apologise slash ask him out. That’s pretty much it.”

 “I’m sorry for cockblocking you. I’ll give you free coffee to make up for it,” the barista offered.

 “Thanks, I could use that actually. I have an exam I haven’t studied for and a hand-in essay I haven’t begun coming up in the next few days, so I’m guessing I’m not going to be getting a lot of sleep for a while.” Dan said.

 “You already look like you haven’t gotten a lot of sleep in a while,” the barista pointed out.

 Dan chuckled joylessly. “Thanks, everyone says that to me when I meet them.”

 “I mean, I also haven’t been getting a lot of sleep. And no offense to your Jack, but it’s kind of because of him.” 

 “Oh yeah? Give me the tea,” Dan said. Then he frowned. “Or the coffee. I don’t know whether you do make tea here.”

 “I’ll give you the tea and the coffee,” the barista joked, grabbing a cup to start making Dan’s drink. “It’s not really that interesting tea, though. I just have to keep on doing Jack’s shifts because he always says he’s busy last minute. He’s such an asshole. Probably did you a favour with the cockblock, mate.”

 “Damn. Thanks for that, I guess,” Dan said, and the barista laughed, giving Dan an odd warm fuzzy feeling inside. Before he could fully process what that was, the barista handed him the drink.

 “Here,” he said, and Dan took a sip, pleasantly surprised.

 “I have to say, this is a lot better than the one Jack gave me,” Dan commented.

 “Of course it is. Jack’s shit at making coffee,” the barista said.

 Dan laughed. “Yeah, it was kind of nasty.”

 “You should probably get to that essay soon, though,” the barista said, and Dan suddenly realised he may have overstayed his welcome. He cleared his throat.

 “Yeah, probably should. Thanks for the free coffee,” Dan said.

 The barista smiled. “Yeah, it was no problem.”

 “I didn’t catch your name, by the way.” 

 “Phil. And you are?”

 “Dan.”

 “Dan,” Phil said, like he was trying the name out for the first time. “Nice to meet you, Dan.”

 “Nice to meet you too, Phil,” Dan said, and left happier than he’d felt in weeks.

[kmoneykmoney137]

Invisible String

The pages in my book rustled in the wind as I sat on the bench reading the next chapter for class. The leaves on the ground were a mix of red, yellow, and brown. The sky above matched the color of the cover of the book in my hand, grey. Clouds were forming and I knew by the time I walked out of class the temperature will have dropped.

I pull my jacket tighter around my body and put my book and notes back into my backpack and get up from the bench I was on to start crossing the courtyard to get to my last class of the day. I put my headphones on and hit shuffle and music starts to flood my ears. I check my phone and see that I had a new notification from my roommate Isabella.

"Are we still on for tonight?" reads the text from Isabella. "Of course, I just need to get through this last lecture then I'll go home and get ready" I respond.

I push through the wide doors of the lecture hall with my hip and start heading to my seat. I smile as I see the person in the seat right next to mine. "Hey Ez" I say with a smile as I sit down. "Hello Evelyn" he says while he smiles back.

I met Ezra last year in one of my literature classes and was happy to see a familiar face at the start of the term in this class. Today Ezra has on a green oversized jumper and a white beanie hiding his soft blonde hair. The professor walks in and I quickly put away my phone and pull out my binder and book for the class. I glance at the clock at the front of the lecture hall already yearning for it to be two hours later than it already is.

"Hello class, I hope everyone is well. Today were going to start off by talking about chapter 13 in your book that you were supposed to have read for the day" the Professor states. I pull out a pen and paper and prepare to take notes. About an hour into the lecture I see a hand slide a note onto my notepad.

"Are you going to Rumors tonight? I see written on the note in Ezra's handwriting. A shy smile comes to my lips as I flip the card over and reply. "Only if you're going to be there" and slide the paper back over to him. A smile grows on his face as he reads my response.

Rumors was a bar that was right off campus that a lot of the upper classmen went to on the weekends, and since it was a Friday night, there was no doubt in my mind that the bar was going to be full.

Ezra slides another note onto my notepad that reads "First drink is on me." I smile as I finish reading the words he's written and as I look up, I receive a wink from him before he starts paying attention to the lecture again.

Ezra and I did not talk much before this class although we've known each other from previous classes. We sat next to each other in this class at the start of the term and soon study sessions in the library turned into dinner study sessions at either my apartment or his and those quickly just turned into us hanging out.

Another hour quickly passes, and the clock hands turn to twelve and seven and it's not long before the people in the lecture hall are packing up their bags to head home. I quickly zip up my belongings and wait for Ezra to finish getting his things in order.

"Am I finally going to be able to get you to sing karaoke tonight with me at Rumors or are the second and third drinks going to have to be on me too, to get that to happen?" Ezra jokes. A soft scoff escapes my lips as I roll my eyes and start heading for the door.

"Ez, you of all people should know that I cannot sing to save my life" I say.

"Oh, don't say that, your talents need to be shown to the world, not just me" he jokes back. We push open the door and as expected the temperature has dropped. A shiver goes through my body and I begin to put on the jacket I brought with me.

The wind picks up and a mini tornado of leaves swirl around our feet blending their colors together. A loose curl falls in my face and I quickly tuck it back behind my ear. Ezra begins to talk to me about a book he is reading in one of his other literature classes that I have already read, and I nod when necessary and provide commentary when needed.

Ezra is a literature major here at Boston College. I'm a literature minor but a history major so some of our classes have overlapped. The leaves crunch under our feet and we near the bus stop that takes us back to our apartments. We wait for about five minutes for the next bus to arrive and make small conversation during the time. When it does finally arrive, we board the bus and find a seat towards the back.

I study Ezra's face while he talks, he has a way of being beautiful without even trying.

His soft curls that are tucked away under his beanie are normally out on full display and look like he just rolled out of bed. But in a good way. His hazel eyes look like they can't decide if they want to be green or brown and are fighting for the spotlight. His dimples are on full display as he tells me about a joke that he heard earlier from one of his friends and his lips... if I moved two inches closer to him right now, I could finally know what it feels like to have those lips against mine.

I quickly shake the thought of that away and pay attention to what he is saying. I told myself, like every other girl has probably told themselves, that I would not fall for Ezra, but here we are. I see the stop for my apartment coming up and pull the line to signal the bus to stop.

"Okay I'll see you tonight, I'm going with Matthew and Chris but don't worry I'll find you." Ezra says with a smile. I nod and respond, "Sounds good see you there." While giving him a small wave and hopping off the bus.

I walk about a minute around the block and finally reach the doors of my apartment. I click in the four-digit code and soon hear the lock click and push the door open. I walk into the living room to hear the sounds of Broad City playing from the tv and see Isabella on the coach watching.

When she hears me come in Isabella quickly turns around and gives me a big grin. Isabella is one of the smartest as well as one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen.

Isabella is tall and lean with umber brown skin. She has long jet-black hair which she either wears in box braids or straight down. Tonight, she is wearing a white cropped tank top with high wasted jeans and a black blazer with her hair straightened and down.

I set my backpack down on the ground and sit next to her.

"Hey! there's no time for sitting you have to go get ready" Isabella states. I roll my eyes and push myself back up. "We're not going for like another hour" I say. "Yes, I'm fully aware of that but it is chilly out and I want to be one of the first ones at the door, so we won't have to wait" she rebuttals.

I groan and pick up my backpack and head to the other side of the apartment to my room. I open my door and head over to my closet to search for something to wear. I start to skim through my closet and hear footsteps nearing my room. I glance up to see Isabella walk into my room and take a seat on my bed. I continue to browse but then end up picking out a black turtleneck and a brown baby doll dress from my closet.

I set the clothes on my bed and go to my bathroom to get my makeup bag. When I walk back into my room Isabella is scrolling through her phone. "Is Ezra going to be there tonight?" She asks me and glances up. A small blush creeps up my neck as I respond "yes."

Isabella smirks and I shoot her a glare. I've never told Isabella about how I feel about Ezra, but she is the one person who knows me better than I know myself. So, I'm not surprised that she knows. I head back to the bathroom and quickly change into the clothes I picked out.

I walk back out to my room and sit in front of my mirror and start putting on some makeup. Isabella and I catch up and tell each other about how our day went. Isabella is a WGS major and her classes are a lot more interesting than mine, so I love hearing about what she learns. After I finish applying my lipstick I move onto my hair. I get up to put my makeup bag back into the bathroom and on my way back grab a pick to fluff up my curls. I had them tied back all day so they're a little flat.

I push the pick into my hair bringing more life to my curls. I do some last-minute touches and then check the time on my bed side table clock. It's already past eight and it'll take us at least fifteen minutes to take the bus there, we better start going. Isabella, seeing that I'm finished walks out and goes into her room to grab her purse and slip on her shoes. I do the same in mine. We walk out of the apartment together and lock the door behind us.

It's a short walk back to the bus stop and pretty soon we see the bus that will take us a block from the bar pull up. As it comes to a stop in front of us, I can already see how full the bus is through the windows, most likely people also headed to the bar. We get on and stand next to each other in the front of the bus holding onto the handles as it starts to move. I look around and am flooded with unfamiliar faces. Most people on the bus look-like upper-class men while a few look like they are really going to need their Fake ID's to work in order to get in. I turn back around and look out the window at the cars driving by.

"Are you getting drunk tonight?" Isabella asks from beside me. "I'm not too sure yet" I respond. I did want to get drunk tonight, but I also know I have an exam in one of my history courses that I have not started study for at all on Monday. Which means I can either try to study with or without a hangover tomorrow and I would prefer the last option.

The bus soon pulls up to the stop that we need to get off at and we quickly shuffle off. Isabella and I start walking around the block to head to the bar. As we approach, we see a line start to form near the entrance. I check my phone and see that its 8:50, only ten more minutes till the bar opens. We get in line towards the front and I start to look around to see if Ezra is there yet. I don't see him or his friends, so I decide to text him.

I look down at my phone to start texting him when suddenly someone bumps into my shoulder. I stagger and look up and see a boy with brownish blonde hair giggling while a blush creeps up on his neck. "I'm so sorry about that, my friend accidentally pushed me" he says with an Irish accent and a hint of a giggle still in his voice. I glance at his friend who is walking in front of him but all I can see is the back of a head of curly hair. The guy who bumped into me gives me a smile and then turns to catch up to his friend.

"I swear guys never look where they're going." Isabella says in an annoyed voice. "I know it's so annoying" I agree while I nod my head and then look back down at my phone to continue texting Ezra. Just as I am about to hit send, I feel a tap on my shoulder and look up to see Ezra in front of me with a smile on his face.

A smile comes to my face immediately. "I was just about to text you" I tell him. "Yeah sorry we were running a little late, I couldn't find my wallet" Ezra says.

"Hey Ez" Isabella says with a smile and a small wave and I see her eye his two friends. Ezra responds with a hello and then introduces his two friends to Isabella. I've met Matthew and Chris before, one time while studying at Ezra's apartment they came over and we all ended up getting dinner.

I feel my phone buzz and look down to see a text from Isabella. "I need you to help me get Chris PLEASE" it says.

I laugh and give her a wink. We wait another five minutes and then are finally let into the bar. The five of us find a table and then Ezra goes up to get the drinks. "So, Chris, how is your term going so far?" Isabella asks. Chris has light brown hair that almost curls and has puppy dog brown eyes with a smile that takes up most of his face. He seems like the type of guy Isabella would go for so the text she sent earlier was not too unexpected.

He responds and pretty soon the two-start chatting. I start making conversation with Matthew and not long after Ezra returns with the drinks. About an hour in we are all still at the table the only difference being most of us are already three shots or more in. My body is starting to feel warm and I'm suddenly laughing at every joke that is said.

Around us the bar is full of people our age either singing karaoke or at tables like our chatting with their friends. Laughter and music can be heard all throughout the bar. Ezra leans over the table towards me and asks, "Alright are you ready to get up there and sing now?" I roll my eyes and laugh; Ezra knows how terrible of a singer I am. "Only if you go up there and sing with me." I say back with a grin.

"Okay okay I'll do it." He says with a smile, his dimples on full display. Ezra is four drinks in and the rose color that's formed on his cheeks are evidence of what is currently flowing through his body. "Go request a song for us." He says and nods his head over to the DJ table.

I stand up to start walking over to the DJ to put our names down on the list and request a song. I weave through numerous bodies and  eventually make it over to the DJ booth. I reach to grab the pen but suddenly there is a hand below mine that grabs it before me. My brows furrow and I look up but my breath leaves my body as two emerald eyes stare back at me.

Hi! This is the first chapter of my Harry fic on Wattpad called Invisible String... if you’d like to read more click here: https://www.wattpad.com/user/Kmoneykmoney137 !!! 

Thank’s so much for reading ♥️ 

[danwhobrowses]

Valentines 2020: A Celebration of My Ships

So it’s valentine’s day again, and...yeah it’s not too great when you’re single is it? Considering that I’ve already gone through a tub of ice cream...

But, it doesn’t mean I’m a cynic, quite the opposite. Most of my fandoms involves a ship in some shape or form, hell I shipped before I even knew what shipping was, so I’m gonna talk about some of them...the ones that still make me happy and didn’t crash and burn in heartbreaking and frankly insulting fashion (looking at you Homestuck ¬_¬), gotta mention that these are not all the ships I ship, they’re just some of the ones I’m quite consistently high on

New Entries So with new fandoms come new ships...as is the usual formula anyway, though my pattern of watching things is usually with some delay, I only watched Rurouni Kenshin and started My Hero Academia in 2019, I still hold off on Attack on Titan and My Hero Season 4 because if I get in, I get IN. So these fandoms may not be new, but they are new to me Steven Universe is very new to me, I’ve been aware of how good it is and their concepts like Fusion. I like it, particularly Lapis Lazuli I really relate to her, but ship wise the two I really like are the obvious ones; Steven x Connie and Ruby x Sapphire (Garnet)

Garnet is badass and chill at the same time, but when she unfuses we see the stuff that makes me smile, the pda between Ruby and Sapphire is adorable, the little pecks and whatnot softens me up like no man’s business. Steven and Connie also have the mushy dynamic with both of them deeply into each other but still being strong individuals. The love for each other is equally platonic as it is romantic as they gel together, both being strong willed in different ways. The laughter probably gets me the most with both of them, the genuine laughter is so sweet and so realistic it’s hard not to love. My Hero Academia seems to be our next wave of shonen anime and for good reason, it does high notes so well and the cast of characters are vibrant and exciting. I haven’t hit Season 4 yet since I’m waiting till it’s all done to binge so I may be a little behind on some stuff (sadly it’s hard to avoid spoilers, I know about Infinity and Unbreakable). While I do like Deku x Uraraka, Tetsutetsu x Kendo and Eraserjoke but the two that I find most enjoyable are Todomomo and Kamijirou

(artist nonoko135 btw, bit tough to find a single image with both ships) Fairly popular ships in their own right, Todomomo doesn’t get many hints but they are sweet, naive rich kids with their own confidence issues, it also feels like they look out for each other especially after the final exam they did together. With Kamijirou though it’s probably one I favour if I had to choose between the two, simply because it’s a dynamic I really like; she busts on him so hard to mask her enjoyment of his company and he takes it because he feels at ease around her, the best part is when Kaminari goes 0 volts, he makes her laugh and that’s kinda big for Jirou given how self-conscious and stoic she can be. Rurouni Kenshin was always on my list, I have often heard about the Swordsman with a blade that cuts no-one. The anime is a bit up and down, after Shishio it’s just filler, but as documented in my Redemption Arc post it is at its core a great story of redemption for the main character, and the driving force for Kenshin’s redemption is his love for Kaoru

While Sano and Megumi have a unique dynamic hinted to be romantic at times, nothing can really beat Kenshin and Kaoru, she literally became Kenshin’s conscience, a representation of his hope to be a good man away from the shadow of Battousai the Manslayer. It may be your traditional romance of the two wanting to be by each other’s side in danger but it works so well given the kind of danger Kenshin is often in. Kaoru still strives to protect herself and aid Kenshin in a way that doesn’t make her continuously wonder about being a burden and Kenshin does everything in his power to keep Kaoru from pain, physical and emotional, even if it meant leaving to keep her safe. The main part of what makes this lovely is the fact that not only did Kaoru’s influence make Kenshin value his own life once more but after continual torment in his past she still saw him as the person he wanted to be, and welcomed in a new home, a new family he was able to live a life he never imagined he could deserve. The Regulars Our Regulars are the ships I still consistently ship, they’re not very old but they’re still pretty great and they still stand the test of time. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. has quite a few ships over its 6 (coming up 7) season lifespan, being the longest surviving MCU tv series and one of the most consistently great shows MCU offered - especially Season 4, some of the best TV was on Season 4. But while Philinda is close, Mack and Yoyo or even Piper and Davis (don’t, I don’t care if you believe she’s a lesbian with the hots for May these are my ships) there is one one ship in Shield you can all rally behind, Fitzsimmons

Even when canon it is a consistent emotional rollercoaster. One of those ships where the writers know you love it and decide to put you through as much pain and emotional torment as humanely possible. But you endure it, because these two smart kids are worth it. They have sweet moments, badass moments, emotional moments and even though they get brought apart time and time again, they still find each other, the universe cannot stop them - and it better end happily for them come next season. Overwatch was a phenomenon when it came out a few years ago, Blizzard may have caused it to have some heavily bad rep but I still look forward to its sequel coming out. Given its large roster and most of the characters’ sexuality and relationship status up in the air, it leaves a lot of room for shipping. I do still love Anahardt, Mercy76 kinda falling due to 76 being gay but I like Gency too, my rarepairs include McPharah and Symmzo but my favourite is actually Meihem.

Now I know, Mei’s only voice lines towards Junkrat are cold, they have differing views in terms of omnics and...due process of the law. But there’s a lot they do have in common; both are quite intelligent engineers having made their weapons by hand, both endured trauma and both love their puns. But even the stuff that make them different can compliment one another. You don’t have to like it, but I do, I enjoy the dynamic of Jamison being so head over heels that he embarrasses himself to try and get Mei’s attention, while Mei softens to the fact that his very nature is warped by his lawless upbringing and that deep down he is an exciting and in his own way sweet guy.  Back to anime, because what else do I do with my day, getting into One Piece was always going to be a long effort, keeping tabs on the Manga does make it easier and I’ve been able to catch up quickly. Ships are shaky territory with One Piece because Oda does make a point of not having romance happen a lot, not to existing living characters at least. But I still have the ones I like; Shanks x Makino, Sabo x Koala, Franky x Robin, Sanji x Pudding, Rebecca x Koby, the list goes on, but my favourite has to be Zoro x Tashigi

May not be up there with the ‘big ships’ of One Piece but I do enjoy them the most. Individually the two are characters I have deep interest in; Zoro is well Roronoa Fucking Zoro, santoryu swordsman extraordinaire, master of nothing happening and will cut you 8 ways to Sunday, but Tashigi is a character I like because she also tries, unlike Zoro she isn’t blessed with 2 years training with Mihawk and she’s at constant arms with this self doubt that as a Woman she won’t be as strong (and probably whoever of influence to her made her believe such a thing), people may get on her back for never winning a fight but she fights strong people without a second thought. But back to the pairing, they have an interesting dynamic; two very similar people on different sides of the law, I don’t think Tashigi continues to chase him simply because he refused to cut her in their fight and I don’t think it’s just her former resemblance to Kuina that gets Zoro so riled up about her, I mean Zoro is usually so chill to side characters to the point where he’s ready to throw down but with Tashigi, it’s different, they bicker but he also came to her aid. I still continue to hope that Tashigi shows in Wano for more Zoro interaction, and to prove herself to fans and to Zoro that she is strong and capable. One of my favourite anime of all time is Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, a combination of laughter, tears and deep philosophical character journeys in a 20th century world with the alchemy fantasy element drawn from actual legit alchemical sources. It just hits all the right notes for me, and ships hit right too; I love most of the ships from EdWin, AlMay and LingFan, but like Fitzsimmons there is one ship that stands above even the main characters, Royai.

Mustang and Hawkeye right from the bat have that connection that needs no dancing around, they care for each other but they work together. Like the rest of the ships they banter, argue but always have each other’s backs, to the point that they go into an insane rage at even the threat of the other being hurt. I don’t think anyone can not ship these two, that’s how strong their chemistry is, even if they can’t officially label it as a relationship because of their jobs it’s that line in the sand that everyone knows it, because it’s impossible to ignore. The Old Guard So we get to the oldest ships in my catalogue, the fact that they could stand the test of time is for a long time what shaped me as a shipper. I still ship these to this day so I ship them pretty hardcore Comics is probably the hardest place to ship something, because different writers will try different pairings at the drop of a hat. Even consistent pairings like Spiderman and Mary Jane, Batman and Catwoman, Beat Boy and Raven, Superman and Lois and more can end up being split in favour of Cindy Moon (I do love Silk), Wonder Woman and others. But I can’t ignore the fact that I’ve always loved Dick Grayson and Barbara Gordon

I may’ve liked Teen Titans, but I was never on Team Starfire, it’s fine if you are but to me I have always been in with Dick and Babs. Not only do they have excellent banter but they gel well on and off of crime fighting, no matter how many times DC break them apart (like seriously, how many times do you have to try Bruce and Barbara until you realise that it creeps people out?) they always find each other again someway down the line, they are one of DC’s best couples and while they may never get a definitive ending because of the nature of comics, I still love that there’s a relationship of two strong individuals who can stand as equals and continue to keep their charm and wit after years of being together. When I was young, decades ago as it pains me to type, Digimon was the prime competitor against Pokémon’s tidal wave. Its anime had an awesome opening, more characters with some deeper themes and a quicker pacing. While many could quickly connect to Tai or Matt for their leaderlike attitude or Joe and Izzy for their intelligence or Mimi and Sora for their determination, I gravitated towards TK, a child who had room to grow and the greatest of potential, so when the Dark Masters came in we saw one of my oldest ships take form, Takari

TK and Kari’s pairing was popular that it managed to carry on into Adventure 02 and we got plenty of lovely moments in TRI (though they shorthanded both by having Ophanimon quickly fused and Seraphimon - one of the strongest Digimon - digivolve as backup in a Sora episode). 02′s epilogue is of course a sore spot we can hope Kizuna retcons because these two have been through thick and thin and their bond is clear. Even as they reach their late teens and TK has become master of hats and joined Matt’s band, they still hang out, banter and tease but they still are comfortable to hold each other’s hand and be vulnerable with one another too. Digimon may’ve been a contender, but Pokémon was still the clear winner, even to this day it is one of the most popular franchises in the world. The anime may be an up and down slope (current series seems a tad boring, 10 episodes before Ash caught a Pokémon, plus I don’t like that Ash won in Alola and now thinks he doesn’t have to try) but you can never take away the nostalgia, or the ships. I’ve shipped many in Pokémon in various media; Mallow x Lillie and Jessie x James in the anime, Ruby x Sapphire in the Manga, Looker x Anabel in the games (with Emma being their adoptive daughter dammit Looker you could’ve taken her with) among others and from Pokémon comes the oldest ship I’ve ever shipped, Pokéshipping

Before I even knew what Shipping was I shipped this, Misty may also be mostly the reason for my attraction to redheads but that’s neither here nor there. People may not like it, may prefer some of the softer spoken female (or male) companions Ash has had or feel they’ve grown out of it, but not me. I loved Misty’s feistiness and determination but also the fact that she could reign Ash in (sometimes) to make him think things through, as much as Misty was a companion to Ash she was a rival, a teacher and a supporter of his goal, but she also had her own goals which she fought for as well. They may bicker but they have also had tender moments as well and even with Misty’s return in the excellent Sun and Moon episodes they had their chemistry is palpable. To me, Ash and Misty were kindred spirits and the feeling has never changed since. So with another year of Valentine’s Day going the way it usually does, I’d like a moment to thank these ships, and all my other ships I didn’t have the space to mention, for being something that brings out happiness and a soft joy deep within my being, and for all the fanartists and fanfic writers that bring that love to life Happy Valentine’s Day

[blankdblank]

Ridikulus Pt 23

Waiting for laundry to be done you were left to another dress at your lack of jeans. Dark blue short sleeved with thick black tights underneath and silver heeled booties. Halfway pulled up your hair hung down your back and in the hidden pockets on your dress your enchanted pouch and wand sheath were hidden. Each class went smoothly with all of the teens excited already for the practice exams coming up before Easter break, the set date when Thorin and his kin had settled for his public coronation.

Shifted gazes to the window in your final class before lunch with 5th years drew yours as well when the colored mists filled the sky making you mumble, “What the..” hastily you wet your lips and said, “Not long till next class, quiet study. I have to see to this, please try to keep the fires to a minimum.”

Chuckles filled the room of now standing students watching as you walked through your doorway into Rivendell’s main courtyard where you closed your eyes muttering, “Come on Lindir.” A turn of your head had you opening them again, “There you are,” A sudden pop away and you were outside a study, inside Lindir sat across from the Feanoreans, Elros and Elrond all in discussion, quietly you popped off again. This time back to Greenwood but not in time to have missed being spotted by Maglor, now stating that they were being spied on making Lindir urge that you must have come for aid in something.

Passing the Throne Room you spotted Thranduil mid meeting and hurried past in a cloud of mist until you found Legolas at an archery lesson for new guards. “Leg,” you whispered turning his head from the Elven guards now lowering their bows to bow their heads to you. A grin ghosting across his lips nearing you as you said, “We have a problem.” That made his brow inch up, “There’s more coming.” His hand extended accepting yours to pop back to the edge of Black Lake in time to see the first body fall from the colored clouds of light hovering above the water.

Reaching out your hand you whispered, “Imobulus,” one after another hundreds of stunned Elves floated above the lake you guided to an ice bridge crossing the water surrounding the school.

After a glance at you Legolas said with a gentle tap of his fingers on your shoulder, “I will show them to the arches.”

You nodded “Thank you, I will try not to get strangled,” His brows inched up in concern making you giggle and say, “Joke, I’m good here.”

Hundreds soon grew to thousands and missing RoR class you helped the last of the confused Elves down to the ground where they looked you over and hurried to join the rest of the crossing Elves on the bridge headed for the archways a group of guards from Greenwood were now ensuring they took the right one to Southern Greenwood.

.

At the Professor’s table you shared the news of the arrivals with the other Professors and Dumbledore, who agreed and sent word to the Order for a spare set of bodies to help aid any others that might show up. Three classes and a break you spent to check on Em at home, where you ran into Lindir and shared why you had gone to Rivendell, an admission sending him back to Rivendell to share the news luring Celeborn with his daughter in his arms to see if he could aid Thranduil at all.

.

Six o’clock found you strolling to the edge of the lake that had caught another couple hundred fresh arrivals to be led across to the Elven Kingdom awaiting them. In a startled squeak you turned your head from Glorfindel who had showed up beside you unnoticed making him lay his hand on your shoulder, “I did not mean to startle you.” His eyes looking you over, “Have you missed your classes for this?”

Catching his gaze you shook your head, “No, some of the Order took over for me after lunch.”

Glorfindel, “I had heard quite a number had arrived in your lands.” Another final flash of light sent out a final collection of bodies, a rise of your hand had them floating safely down to the shore beside you with awed gazes at you and respectful bows of their heads to Glorfindel, whom they recognized. The men with small children in their arms followed his urging to the bridge while the woman lingered peering up at the castle and curious teens in the distance.

Her eyes in his approach flinched over to you again and she caught your gaze and easy smile before glancing to Glorfindel at his throat clearing softly making her bow her head to him and softly state in Doriathian, “Lord Glorfindel.” Her eyes shifted to you again.

He smiled softly, stating, “It is a pleasure to meet you, this is my One, Jaqiearae Black, future Queen of the Greater Greenwood.”

In the common tongue you mumbled, “Must you tell everyone that I’m Queen?”

He smirked at you, “She will learn it eventually.” He looked back to her, “Might I have your name?”

In her glance down to you she smiled softly in return to yours, “I am Taule, Daughter of Taumo.”

Curiously he asked, “You wouldn’t happen to have a Son?”

Her eyes lit up in an eager gasp as her hands fixed on his, “You’ve seen Thranduil? Is Oropher with him?”

Glorfindel smiled softly at her assuring him, “We are just on our way to see Thranduil now. Your Son is King and rules over those lands.”

Softly she asked, “King?”

Glofindel, “I am sorry, your Husband fell in the last age.”

She nodded and then looked to you again, “You are to be Queen?”

You nodded, “Glorfindel and Thranduil are my Ones.”

Glorfindel motioned you all forward saying, “I do have some good news for you.” Her eyes shifted to him again in your turn, “You have a Grandson.”

A smile eased onto her face and she neared you asking, “Yours?”

You shook your head, “No, he’s at least a thousand years older than I am.”

Glorfindel chuckled, “Closer to three Dearest.”

Along the way he shared more about the King and Prince until Legolas came into view when you had entered Southern Greenwood’s archway, exhaling as he stated, “Naneth, I am glad you are here. Ada could use your help.”

In a curious glance at the woman beside you at her stunned gasp making her clap her hands over her mouth. In a tilt of your head you stated, “Legolas, this is Taule.” At once his eyes flinched back to her with parted lips, “Your Grandmother.”

He stepped closer to her accepting her hand settling on his cheek with a teary smile through their foreheads meeting, before he stated, “Ada will be glad to see you.” He led the way with her hand in the crook of his arm into the crowded lower palace as the Elves milled about, around their new King atop a set of stairs scanning over them for any sign of his Son returning from his fetching you.

A flash of silvery blue brought him down and into the masses on the path straight for you at once he stated when he drew close enough, “Jaqi, thank you for returning.” His eyes shifted over you admiring your figure hugging dress before he turned his eyes to the tall Elleth beside you, “Naneth.” Instantly he folded around her through her gleeful hug, his smile grew when their eyes met again and her hands landed on his cheeks. “Are you tired?”

She shook her head lowering her hands, “No. I am perfectly fine.”

He nodded and wet his lips, “Naneth, why don’t you go with Legolas to get some tea while I try and settle this matter here. It seems none of the others are tired nor hungry leaving no way to lessen the crowds. You can meet our adopted sons as well.”

She nodded, “I will let you handle this. Take your time my precious bud.”

He smiled again kissing her cheek then chuckled at her whispered compliment on you before turning to loop her arm around Legolas’ for the tour through the upper kingdom on the way to tea.

Glorfindel nodded then turned to you smiling at you as he stated, “I should return to the boys. I promised I would not be gone long.” Leaving a gentle peck on your cheek before turning away to the portal for Northern Greenwood.

Turned to you Thranduil stated in a momentary cradle of your hand, “As it goes, I need your help. We need to guide these people into the new guest wings. Thankfully it wasn’t the thousands we lost to all arrive at once, but still…”

You smirked and you pecked him on the cheek. You freed your hand to hop up on a half wall in a surprisingly graceful move to the Elven guards taken notice of your short skirt. Atop it you let out a clear whistle silencing the crowds holding up a slip of paper and a pen, speaking clearly in Doriathian you stated, “Slips of paper are going to be going around, please write your names and titles on them so we can have you properly re-housed. If you cannot write your name simply state it and the pen will write it for you.”

Nods spread through the crowd as the paper multiplied and the groups of families all added their names to the papers that flew back to you after colored orbs of light floated over their heads through Tauriel’s arriving with the floor plans Thranduil had requested.

Hopping down again with hold of your skirt you moved to their sides and shuffled the papers magically as a set of fresh papers appeared and floated beside you writing out the names assigned to each apartment. Peering over your shoulder Thranduil couldn’t help but grin happily at your ease in aiding him with this task.

Each eager Elf around you watched your quiet conferencing with their new King in amazement at your powers and ease they were sent off to admire their new housing after respectfully greeting you both properly. Those from the abandoned wings or their relations were guided through to Northern Greenwood, where they were greeted fondly by old friends and relatives. All pleased at the grand kingdom they were now a part of, accepting the wait on new roles they would hold to be assigned to them in the next couple days.

After a relieved exhale Thranduil caught your eye after his lean in to kiss your cheek, “Thank you.”

You smiled up at him and let out a giggle, “We should get you up to see your Mother.” After a pause you asked, “I have to ask, why is Legolas calling me Mother?”

Thranduil smiled through a weak chuckle, “It is Elven tradition, to pay respect to our bond.”

You nodded, “So I’m not actually meant to, mother him? I mean, Glorfindel said he’s thousands of years older than me. Best I could do is make him smile every now and then, not tell him to clean his room.”

He let out a weak chuckle, smiling at you adoringly, “That is enough, trust me. It will be difficult, but we will get everyone settled, Legolas will be far more distracted by bonding with the young Princes and Estel, whom my Naneth would love to assist in raising as well so we may have more time together. King Dior often brought them to our shop she loved fawning over them as everyone else did, she would not allow the Feanoreans near them.”

“Thank you, for backing me up on that.”

Again he leaned in to press his forehead to yours, easing his hands over your shoulders and arms, “I will always defend your positions in these matters.” He drew back to add, “My Naneth adores your hair.” You let out a weak giggle and accepted his hand to join him for the walk to the Northern Kingdom to meet up with the others for tea.

By sunset the Elves were again peacefully milling around the Kingdom joining in on the planning for the upcoming celebration for their new Queen they eagerly joined in on to show their gratitude for your accepting them.

.

Up in the main dining room in the Royal Wing you found Taule happily chatting with the Princes over the spread of snacks while Glorfindel and Legolas both were debating over which gardens to show the pair first. Their disagreement ending as you both entered taking your seats, with a soft smile Taule ushered you to the seat beside her to accept your hand as she stated, “The Princes informed me of what those Lords said about you, now I haven’t seen Melkor for myself but I am certain you could not be him. I can see great strength in you, but nowhere near the darkness necessary to fuel such hatred and dark deeds.”

Her hand patted yours, “Besides, any able to destroy that cursed ring with such ease should have those Lords second guessing their behavior concerning you.”

You let out a weak chuckle, “I’ve met worse than them before. They will learn to trust, or at least tolerate me in the future.”

Though across the table you eyed Celeborn in his stating, “It was a shame that we were unable to aid you earlier when you arrived at Rivendell. I do believe the Lords have quite worn on Elrond’s patience in assuming a plot of some sort in your sudden vanishing.”

In a huff you stood making Thranduil stand as well alongside Glorfindel, “Alright, fine, they won’t let this go I’ll go deal with the prima donnas.” While you strode to the garden to get to the archways Thranduil left a peck on his mother’s cheek and hurried after you catching up with the curious Lords Glorfindel and Celeborn still confused at your term you had called them.

Into Rivendell you stepped and caught the sound of shouts you followed until in the middle of a courtyard the rest of Feanor’s sons had been ushered through to this archway instead and all turned when Maedhros called out, “Melkor you will surrender the Princes!”

Elros, “Maedhros, she is not Melkor!”

Maglor, “Lies! You will surrender the boys! We will not fall to your ruse!”

With a nod you asked, “Let’s say I am Melkor, ‘Hand over the boys, or what?’ Hmm?”

Maedhros halted in his pacing and turned to face you, “I beg your pardon?”

“Begging is a nice start but it’ll take more than that to win me over, now, answer my question. Or what?”

The firm gaze locked on him had the other brothers looking you over telling right away you were not the person they had assumed while Maedhors approached you in a fiery glare not noticing the subtle signs you were taking in his seven and a half foot frame to find his weak points. “You will surrender the Princes or we will unleash a war the likes-,”

“Ooh, war, how original. Because that worked out so well for you last time around.” That had his eyes narrowing and his jaw clenching and his brothers stepping back at your step forward, “Let me make this very clear. I know all about your war for those stones and all the lives ruined and lost because of your oath. Now I prize Elrond’s friendship, he was impossibly kind to my family when they landed here. And it is out of respect for that friendship that I haven’t obliviated your memory into believing you were a baker in Valinor with nothing but night terrors of each and every scream that filled every kingdom you waged war on for the rest of your days to hint at your former life. So this is my offer, you will reevaluate your stance on demanding their custody and tone with me because past your height and build you have nothing over me,  your name is nothing but soaked in blood to me and far from terrifying.”

In a scoff Maglor approached, “What do you know of war child?!”

Suddenly when your gaze hit his he flinched at your cold glare, “Never ask a soldier of war. You ask the children helpless in the kingdoms ravaged by rulers fueled by greed. Ask the mothers clinging to them and using their bodies to shield their children from attacks and falling rubble,” their pride drained from their expressions, “Take a good long look at the terrified children peeking out from behind those they love able to survive the attacks until they learn that the world won’t be exploding and on fire forever. The ones that can still hear the explosions and screams decades later and never get to be at peace in their youth again. Always cautious, always afraid, never completely whole again for what greed had taken from them.”

Maedhros, “Soldiers-,”

“Soldiers speak of honor, glory, the pride of arms and the surge of strength they feel in having a home and loved one to defend. The feel of blood and the weight of the dead, the long walk home again. My uncle started a war, one that brought him to kill thousands of people before it brought him to our door. A prophecy told him a boy would grow to bring him down so he went hunting for infants that could fit the prophesy,” the brothers paled as you brushed your bangs out of your face, “He came to find my mother demanding she join him and turn over my cousin Harry. And he tortured her for hours before she died refusing to turn him over. But you see, he still found him, and killed his parents then tried to kill him, through me. Trust me when I say I know their pain. You murdered their parents and people they grew up around, you murdered the men they could have grown into! I will never give them to you!”

Maglor, “Then Elrond-,”

Elrond, “I agree with her decision. The Princes have chosen her as their guardian.”

“If you want a place in their lives you are going to have to work each and every day proving that you will never hurt them. Because of you I have to show them that they can trust again. That they are safe, from you especially. They are staying under my protection and so help me if you give them one inkling that you mean them or anyone else under my watch harm I will blast you into so many pieces they won’t be able to find a finger left of you.”

Maedhros, “You speak of peace and yet issue threats of death?”

“Threats and death is your tongue, I merely oblige for your ease into the new order of peace.” His eyes scanned over your face as you glanced from him to Maglor, “You are not the first to believe I am a monster, but you won’t be the last to see I am not, even though I very well could have been.” Shifting on your feet you stated to Glorfindel, alternating your tone and stance like there was a switch flipped inside you, “Oh, that reminds me, Em wanted to have the boys for another film tonight if you wanted.”

Glorfindel flashed you a grin, “Of course.”

You looked to Thranduil, “Are you free too? We can ask your Mum and Leg too.”

Thranduil, “I think that sounds lovely.”

Looking at Elrond you grinned saying, “You all can come too if you like. Family film night. It’s a classic we all grew up with.”

Elros asked, “The, whole family?” glancing from the Feanoreans back to you.

On your feet you shifted and you looked up at Maedhros, “The whole family. Chance number one.”

Through your doorway Thranduil fetched the trio of boys, Legolas and his mother while Glorfindel joined you in guiding the others to your home. Each portrait luring their eyes and every open doorway was peered into with the lounging couches inspected as you went to fetch Em. The small girl stunning the Feanoreans when Elrond stated who she was to you, now seeing you had given birth so young and were fostering the boys as well.

Into the theater your younger relatives all pooled taking up seats around you, Glori and Thranduil with the boys, Em, Leg and Taule. Beauty and the Beast played making the curious Elves wonder what other stories you had grown with as a culture.

More of your arrival was once again shared when those returning to Rivendell had left. In the hall however when Celeborn was leaving his eyes flinched wider at your sudden hug around his middle. His gaze shifted to your intendeds who smirked at his kind pat on your back when you said, “I’m so sorry. I heard from Saruman Galadriel and him are sailing West.”

Celeborn, “Ah, yes,” his eyes met yours when you pulled back, “There is no need to apologize Miss Black.”

“Still feel bad, barely got any time with your girls,”

He shook his head, “Do not trouble yourself with this. Though thank you for your concern as our friend. I will put Tin to bed, I hope you sleep well.” Bowing his head to you in your parting as you wished him the same.

Sweetly the men approached you while the boys yawned on their couch. With a sigh you brushed your hair from your face and leaned against Glorfindel’s chest through his tight hug as he mumbled into your hair, “This will all work out.” Drawing back his lips met your cheek with a soft smile saying, “Get some rest, you look tired.”

Wetting your lips you asked in a whisper, “The boys, this makes me their Mother now?”

Thranduil smiled at you, “Only if you wish to be.” Leaning in his lips met yours gently, “Sleep well.”

The pair scooped up the boys for the walk home again while you scooped up Em and carried her upstairs. Echoes of comments on Lockhart’s start to his voyage mingled with comments from those in the Ministry Dale would be shifted in the morning hopefully aiding in the Flue System troubles with a sturdy location for that quadrant to be anchored as well.

Barely a few minutes later your hair was let down and you found yourself sprawled out on your bed burrowing in shorts and one of your dad’s old button down shirts. Sinking off into sleep through the soft shifting of firewood in your sleep as Opal settled in for the night smiling as she felt her body readying to lay the eggs she was carrying within the next few days.

A single tap on your shoulder by Kreacher not long after however brought you painfully from your sleep as you squinted at your doorway a knock had come from. Through a crack in the door you spied Glorfindel with the pair of sniffling boys in his arms, with a sigh your hand patted the large mattress under you through your folding back the covers. Smiles formed on their faces and they wiped their cheeks and settled into bed in front of you when Glorfindel set them down.

His anxious glance at you ended when you nodded your head to the space behind you making him smile to himself on the walk around the bed. He wet his lips as the boys settled down again, with their eyes locked on Opal in the fireplace with Norberta in her usual upside down sprawl on the swinging grate above Opal already asleep.

He settled behind you easing his hand onto your side stretching out a few inches behind you as you softly told the boys about the pair of Dragons breeds comforting them until they fell asleep allowing you to as well.

At least until Kreacher awoke you with a message from Thorin of banners of Men seen in the distance nearing your borders earning a muffled groan from you dying into the chest of the Elf holding you in hopes of not waking the boys. On his back he turned to allow you to climb over him and slip out of bed, smirking after your peck on his cheek at your muttering to yourself as you walked barefoot through the house to the portal to Erebor.

.

On your way to Erebor in your agitated sleep deprived state you made your way to the clearest choice in your mind for someone to be able to both converse with those around you and tolerate the weaknesses and tempers of the Men you would have to endure. Through the crowded main hall Thranduil, still in his plain white loose shirt and tall boots over his pants, froze spotting you, with lips parted as he crossed the distance to you eyeing your crossed arms and drooping ponytail. Softly when he reached you he asked, “Jaqi, why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Apparently Thorin’s guards have spotted Men on our borders and he asked me to meet him in Erebor. I was wondering if you might be able to come too?”

Thranduil nodded, “Of course.” His hand extended accepting the wrap Tauriel had passed him that he eased around his back, folding over the crooks of his arms asking on the way, “If you don’t mind my asking-…”

In a glance up at him you stated, “Honestly, I’m tired and my patience wears thin when I get tired like this. Hence my lovely encounter with the brothers earlier. You’ve met their King, I’d imagine, and if I end up having to drag these Men back to said King I need someone that will keep me from throttling them.”

Thranduil smirked and let out a sigh reaching up to adjust the collar on your shirt that blew up under your chin in a soft breeze, “You will be marvelous.”

You nodded, “This is going to end terribly, just so you know.”

Thranduil chuckled, “I doubt it. If anything we will end up inviting them to your celebration.”

“There’s already so many…”

Thranduil chuckled again, “Trust me, if Rohan is involved it is because they can smell a celebration from miles away. Last Feast of Starlight King Thengol just happened to get lost with hundreds of his Riders and fellow Lords all dressed to standard the day before the big feast and each year prior to that for the past decade.”

You couldn’t help but giggle at it in your reach up to tighten your ponytail as you led Thranduil through your enchanted doorway that appeared inside Thorin’s war room where the Durins turned to you with quick smiles and relieved exhales.

Thorin, “Jaqi, I do apologize for waking you. We simply wished to inform you of this threat.”

You nodded catching his eyes darting to Thranduil curiously then you again saying, “We have sent out Ravens to inquire what they wanted but they have refused to answer.”

You nodded with an attempt at a calming exhale, “I’ll go, speak, with them.”

Thorin smirked catching the irritation in your eyes, “Please do let us know if you need our aid.”

You nodded asking, “How is Bilbo liking the apartment?”

Thorin smirked, “He is very pleased Bag End fit so well inside of it, thank you again. He really is more comfortable with it for our future pebbles. The garden especially, there is the beginnings of a veggie garden seasonal chart to aid in any possible cravings we might have.”

You nodded, “Just over a week and the potion should be done.” That confirmation made Thorin smile again as you turned and led Thranduil back through the doorway towards the location you gained from tapping the mind of the Raven that had been sent earlier.

Pt 24

[hardforbenhardy]

somebody to love pt.4

warnings: mentions of stripping, angst, cute roger, mentions of (not physical) child abuse/bad parenting

word count: 3.9k

pt 4 finally here after a kinda long break of posting fics so i’m sorry, just had a lot on my plate recently - i’m going away soon on a road trip so i’ll probably end up writing a bunch then and publishing when i get back!! anyway, hope you enjoy this one :)

taglist: @jennyggggrrr

“So, this might seem like a weird question, but why do you do it?" Roger asked, looking down at you as you walked down the empty street. The lamps dimly lit the rain-soaked streets, making it impossible to see 5 feet in front of you. Terraced houses line each side of the narrow roads and the sound of raindrops on tiled roofs constantly drum in your ears. The streets are totally isolated, not even the odd car or person breaks the dullness of the black tarmac. The sky is dark and overcast, with the occasional roll of thunder rumbling in the distance. You look up to face Roger, furrowing your brows at his question; "Do what?"

"Stripping. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want, I was just curious. I won't judge you or anything, I promise"

"It's fine, I don't mind" you grin up at him, him quickly returning the favour. "A few months ago, my dad got fired from his job. It put my family into a lot of debt, and my mum never had a job so they have no source of income. My mum, dad and little brother all in one house. So, erm, I looked for a job to help pay the bills for them and it was the first one I came across. I was desperate so I took it. It isn't great pay but it's better than nothing"

"So you're doing it to help your family?"

"Not quite. I'm doing it to help George, my little brother. He's only 12 and he deserves a normal childhood, you know, to be able to get a good education and live in a house and grow up healthily without worrying about where his next meal is going to come from or where he's going to sleep the next night. Helping my parents out too is just a side job. They're not good people. I mean, my Pa got fired for a reason - he didn't work. Both my parents, they just expect everything to be handed to them on a silver plate; they don't work for it, they don't put any effort in. You know, when I told them I was studying Biology at University, they weren't proud of me because I was achieving something, or being successful. They were proud because they knew I could get a job where I'd be able to fund them, so they wouldn't have to. They know I'm only doing it to help George, and they take advantage of it, because if there's one thing I'll never do, it's harm George's future. He doesn't deserve that, he's done nothing wrong. Yet my parents just don't seem to care." you ranted, the words pouring out your mouth as you let out all your feelings that you had been burying deep down. Not even Freddie knew this stuff about you, he thought your parents were financially stable and working; because that's what you had told him. Because you knew Freddie, and if you had told him all of this, he would never ask for rent or never expect you to help out around the apartment. And you needed to take responsibility when it came to things like that. By the time you finished your sentence, your voice cracked and you felt a drop roll down your cheek; you were unsure of whether it was a raindrop or tear but apparently Roger seemed to notice it was a tear. He pulled you into his chest and held you tight, as you sobbed gently, your shame-filled tears soaking into his shirt.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked. I'm sorry you have to deal with all that, you don't deserve to have all that on your back, your brother is so lucky to have a sister like you." He mumbled, attempting to comfort you as he held you so close that you could feel the faint beating of his heart against your head. It was soothing, his warmth encompassing you as his arms wrapped firmly around your waist. You pulled away, wiping under your eyes with your hand as you felt yourself begin to shiver from the sensation of the harsh rain against your bare skin. Roger noticed this, and quickly removed his shirt, wrapping it around your shoulders - "Here, take it."

"Roger, now your going to get cold and wet" you exclaimed, going to remove the shirt from your shoulders, no matter how much it provided warmth and comfort with the smell of Roger radiating from it. However, he stopped you, insisting you wear the shirt. Before you knew it, you were back in the block you shared, walking up the stairs; until you stopped in your tracks at the realisation. You didn't have a key.

"Rog..." you muttered, seeing him turn rapidly, afraid there was something wrong. "What? Is it your hand?"

"I may have left my key in the apartment"

"So? Freddies in?"

"He won't be awake - he has a massive theory tomorrow and I can't wake him, he needs all the sleep he can get. You wouldn't mind if I sleep at yours for the night would you? I'm happy to take the couch, I just cannot wake Freddie - I know he would never wake me when I had an exam the next day. I won't bother you I promise." you mumbled, so quietly that you weren’t even sure he was able to hear you. You were expecting him to turn you down immediately, but when his head shot up at the words 'sleep at yours', you thought your chances were even slimmer than they were before.

"O-of course you can." He answered, showing you the way to his apartment, which was surprisingly closer to yours than you had realised. He began to unlock the door, as you felt a tumultuous pounding in your head as you leant against the frame, presumably from the multiple drinks you had consumed throughout the night. The drunken feeling had previously subsided as you stayed in motion, but now that you had stopped moving, it all rushed to your head all of a sudden. As soon as Roger had threw the door open you ran to the bathroom; bending over the toilet bowl as you threw up all traces of alcohol from your system. Thankfully, the layout of each apartment in the block was practically the same so you knew where you were going. Roger was quickly behind you, his hands wrapping around your flowing hair to keep it out of your face as you were sick. If there was any feeling you hated, it was being sick. You sat back, leaning against the side of the bathtub, as you brushed your fingers through your hair. Your freckled skin glistened in the light of the bathroom as sweat covered your face, your chest rising and falling with every deep breath you took. "God, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this" you mumbled, feeling a tear make its way down your cheek.

"Oh love, don't be sorry - just wait till you have to deal with a drunk Roger and then you'll be sorry" He joked, leaning forward to wipe his thumb gently over your cheek, as you chuckled breathly at his words. "How about we get you into bed, you should get some rest"

You nodded lightly; not trusting your voice; as he helped you up to stand on your feet, stumbling a little from lightheadedness. He wrapped his arm around your waist and walked beside you over to the bed; you wanted to resist and demand you sleep on the couch like you had originally promised, but you lacked any form of energy that allowed you to do so. You were, however, slightly shocked when you felt the bed dip beside you as Roger climbed in on the other side, pulling the covers tightly over his now pajama-clad body. "Do you want a shirt to sleep in? I don't think that dress is going to be very comfortable after all"

"It should be fine Rog, don't worry about it" you weakly smiled back, the truth being this dress was making it incredibly difficult to breath being so restricting, and the leather was creating an extremely uncomfortable friction on your thighs, but there was no possibility that you would be able to stand up and get changed into a new pair of clothes without Rogers help; and Roger was not going to see you in just your panties tonight.

"Y/N, don't be stupid, that dress is 20% lace and 80% leather; there is no way you can sleep in that. I'll help you change if you want?"

"Rog, it's fine honestly!"

"Your not wearing a bra, are you?" He smirked, raising his eyebrows in humour as he turned to face you, your face clouded in embarrassment; all he did was chuckle lightly. "Look, I won't sneak a peek - but there's no way I am letting you sleep in that, even if it means I wait till your asleep and then change you"

"Fine, but if I catch you peaking, you're dead" you shoot him a serious glare, narrowing your eyes before he helps you to sit up and unzips the back of your dress. A shiver passes through your skin as Roger's touch stands cold against your incredibly overheating skin, the alcohol having increased your body temperature already. Having thrown up all the liquor previously, it was no longer making you dizzy and you were fortunately able to pull yourself out of bed, allowing Roger to blindly attempt at pulling the dress over your head. "Rog, you better not be spying" you chuckled, opening your eyes as the dress was finally hauled over your head, only to see Roger squinting his eyes very slightly. You snatched the t-shirt he was holding in his hand, throwing it over your head before slapping Rogers chest rather boisterously with your none-broken hand, scolding him harshly "Roger, you fucking dick, what is wrong with you!"

"Sorry, sorry - I promise, I didn't actually look, I was just taking piss love" Roger chuckled, rubbing the mark you had made on his chest before helping you back into bed. Seeing you turn your bedside light off and turn away from his side once he had climbed back in, Roger whispered "Look, Y/N, I'm being honest - I didn't look, I'm fucking half blind so I can barely see with eyes fully open, let alone half shut. I'm sorry"

But before he knew it, you had fallen into a deep slumber, the calming aroma of cigarettes and Roger's natural scent diffusing from his shirt combined with the utter lack of energy you contained by the end of the night knocking you out completely as soon as your head hit the silken pillow - which also smelled distinctly of Rogers shampoo. Little did you know, you had grown a small smile on your face as you dozed off, which Roger took kind note of.

—-

Sitting in Roger's living room, you felt strangely comfortable - of course, it was the same set out as you flat, but Roger's flat was much more... bland. Compared to yours and Freddie’s apartment, which was vibrant and busy with pictures on the wall and decorations, Rogers was like a prison cell. But it still felt as if you belonged and was welcome here. You were sat, curled up in a thick blanket on the couch, while Roger prepared two teas in the kitchen. His heating had been turned off after not paying his bills, meaning you had to improvise a new way to get some form of heat and comfort. Roger walked slowly into the room, taking his time to ensure he didn't splash any of the beverage onto his carpeted floor, setting the mugs carefully down onto the coffee table in front of you before plonking down on the couch next to you. You leant forward to retrieve your mug, pursing your lips into a small 'o' to blow gently on the top of the tea, before moving back and resting your head gently onto Roger's shoulder. You felt him flinch slightly with your touch, making you move away, reluctant to go any further.

"No, no, it's fine sorry. You can rest on me, just wasn't expecting it" Roger smiled, leaning forward to retrieve his mug also and taking a large sip. He was wearing a thick, soft jumper which he admitted he hadn't worn in years but it was the only thing he could find that was going to keep him from freezing to death; it wasn't something you would expect to see Roger Taylor wearing, but he certainly pulled it off. The material was soft against your cheek as you placed it into the crook of his neck, cuddling up as closely to Roger as was physically possible at the time. He had put the Beatles on his record player on the other side of the room, which was playing gently. You looked up at Roger, admiring his face as he drank the scalding beverage, his eyes squinting through his glasses slightly as he attempted to read the book in his hand that he had pulled out of seemingly nowhere.

"What ya reading?" you grinned, not actually caring about the book one bit, but rather just wanting to start a conversation with him.

"Oh, it's just a book Brian gave me - says it's super interesting stuff on astrophysics or whatever. I would never usually entertain the idea of physics but there is genuinely nothing else to do." He chuckled, taking another sip of his drink before flicking the page.

"We could play something like, I don't know, truth or dare?" you suggested, mentally smacking yourself for proposing such a childish idea.

"Sure - anything to save me from the 'space time continuum' or whatever this is going on about. Okay, truth of dare?"

"Ermmmm, dare" you smirked, looking up at Roger making eye contact. You played for about 30 minutes, Roger daring you to do stupid things like crack an egg on your head and drink pickle juice, whilst he only picked truths meaning you now knew all about his sex life and childhood. You had been avoiding picking truths so far because you knew Roger would bring up something about your sex life or relationships and considering neither of which existed you didn't want to take the chance of exposing yourself.

"Okay, truth or dare?"

"Dare"

"Oh for fuck sake Y/N, you've picked dare every time! I'm beginning to think you have something to hide..." Roger chuckled, raising his eyebrows and poking yourchest lightly. "Fine - truth"

"Finally! Who do you have a crush on?" He questioned, wiggling his eyebrows which made you giggle slightly. His childish question made me immediately blush as you knew you couldn't lie right now; Roger has proven that he is extremely talented at knowing when you’re lying. So you had to play this carefully.

"Seriously Rog, that's your question? Is that all you can think of?" you chuckled, stalling for as long as you possibly could.

"Come on, answer the question!"

"I can't Rog, I can't say- it's embarrassing" you mumbled, leaning to face the ground as you backed away a little from Roger, the closeness between you suddenly feeling a lot more uncomfortable than comforting. "Y/N, I'm not going to judge you, I promise - I mean you know all about my sex life, can't get more embarassing than that. Now, who do you fancy?”

You couldn't hold it in any longer, because you knew there was no getting out of the situation Roger had unknowingly put you into. You took a deep breath, before looking up to stare into Roger's piercing blue eyes which showed just a small hint of hope. "Y-you"

Roger didn't say anything. He just sat there, stone faced as if he had just been told the worst news in the world. And you knew you had fucked up. Bad. "Me?"

"Y-yeah. Sorry. D-do you feel the same?"

"Are you joking? You've got to be taking the piss. Obviously I fucking don't, look at you. I mean, you're a great friend, but never in my life would I fancy you" Roger scoffed, laughing at even the suggestion of liking you. “Y/N, I'm not being funny - you're not exactly my type are you. I mean you're a weird freak who sits in the back of class, who has literally no friends other than me, and not to mention you are a stripper. Couldn't fancy someone knowing they are probably slutting around with hundreds of 50 year old men"

You felt your heart drop to your feet as you found yourself unable to breath. It felt like your whole world had lost its purpose. But the next thing you knew, you were jolting forward from your lying position, only to find yourself back in Rogers bed. Everything was exactly how it had been when you fell asleep; Roger was passed out beside you, spread across the mattress as he lightly snored; you were in his t-shirt he had blindly attempted to put on you, while your dress was thrown on the floor beside the bed; the curtains were still open, letting just a slither of moonlight beam through. You looked to your side, peering at the clock on the bedside table; 3:07 am. It was a dream. No, nightmare. It felt like everything was going in slow motion, when realistically you had only been awake for a few seconds. Roger had noticed your sudden movement, as he began to stir slightly from his slumber; yet this didn't deter you from completely breaking down. Your throat tightened, making it difficult to breath, yet somehow at the same time you were breathing profusely. Your forehead was glimmering in the moonlight as you perspired, feeling exhausted as if you had just been on a marathon. The tears were rolling down your cheeks as the words roamed around your mind like a storm. Weird Freak. No friends. Slutting around. Never in my life would I fancy you. You had heard those words a million times before, you had practically become immune to them. But there was something so devastating, so heartbreaking, hearing it come from the mouth of the one person who you thought saw you differently. Who you truly had feelings for. It was common for you to have nightmares after getting drunk; a weird side effect to the intoxicants; but never has it been so intensely gut-wrenching to experience. You were so out of it, you had barely heard Roger sitting up and moving closer, until he had wrapped his arm around you to pull you into his chest.

"Y/N? Hey, shhh, what's going on? You're okay, shh" He soothed, brushing one hand through your hair whilst the other rubbed up and down your arm in a calming manner. He didn't even know what was happening yet he felt so inclined to help, it sent shivers down your spine and butterflies to your tummy. You found yourself unable to answer, instead just crying into your palms, sniffling as if you had just inhaled a line of pepper. "It's okay, you don't have to speak, just breath"

You were alleviated within a matter of minutes, the tenderness of Rogers arms wrapped tightly around your waist and the rise and fall of his chest rocking your whole body with it. You were finally able to breath at a casual pace again, words coming a bit more naturally than they previously were as you breathed out "S-sorry I woke you"

"Love, don't be silly, you don't have to apologise- just breathe love, that's it. What happened?"

"B-bad dream. Nightmare." you breathed out, attempting to put thoughts to words. It was still replaying in your head, his every word haunting you, What if that was how he actually felt. "What about? Can you try and explain it"

"I-It was a boy. I like him. A-and we were just hanging out, and he asked who I liked. So I told him. A-and he just laughed. In my face - said he could never fancy someone like me, because I'm a w-weird freak, who has no friends and sluts around with 50 year olds. I-I've heard it all before, b-but when it comes from his mouth, it's s-so much worse" you sobbed, tears falling from your eyes once again as you reminisced on the nightmare.

"Oh dear, I am so sorry - that sounds awful. You know none of that is true love, and I don't know what you do with men, but that's none of my business and it wouldn't matter even if you did. Who says you can't have a little fun every now and then?" Roger soothed, his hand still rubbing your band in calming circles, his words making you chuckle. Of course he would say that - he is known for sleeping around. "Who was it? If you don't mind me asking"

"O-oh, Rog, I don't think I can say" you breathed, your mind racing with multiple thoughts of what to say next. Do you just tell him? You feel like youre suffering more keeping it to yourself. But on the other hand, you and Roger had just become friends and you don't want to lose what you’ve gained. What if he reacts exactly the same as he did in the dream? But then again, what if he likes you back - he did invite you out tonight and you did notice him eying you up in that dress. "Why not? I'm not going to judge you, love"

"I don't want it to ruin things between us." you were basically spoon-feeding it to him now, yet he still furrowed his brows in confusion, his brain puzzling to figure out who it was you were on about. "Why would it ruin things between us? Wait, Y/N, oh my god..." Here we go...

"Brian?"

"Brian?!... Yeah! Yeah, it's Brian. I fancy Brian - no one else, just Brian!" you nervously exclaimed, ensuring Roger knew that it definitely was not him. You saw a previous glint of hope in his eyes suddenly dissipate, but you brushed it off. "Sorry - that's probably really weird!"

"Why would it be weird? Brian's a great lad - even though he gets on my nerves far too often! And anyone, he'd be lucky to have someone like you"

"I don't know, because he's your best friend and I've only known him for - literally a few hours" you laugh, realising how stupid my lie actually was. You had met him only 5 hours ago, and you were claiming to fancy him. Yet this didn't seem strange to Roger, as he simply replied with a mumbled "Trust me- I know how it feels to fall for someone you've known for a short time"

"Roger Taylor falling for someone? That's unheard of!" you laughed, seeing him roll his eyes and chuckle along, slapping your right arm gently as a joke. "Just please don't tell him, yeah?"

"I would never"

You let out a loud yawn, having had barely any sleep so far and being exhausted from the shaking after waking. Roger took notice of this, moving to lay you both down before wrapping his arms completely round your waist; your back against his stomach and your hips in sweet contact. You fell asleep faster than you ever had before in your life, the warmth and comfort of Rogers body encompassing you. If only he knew.

[theasstour]

0110. Larghetto elegico.

Wednesday, 8 April 2015

FIC PAGE | CHAPTER SYMPHONY | WORD COUNT: 8k

NB: explicit language, mentions of alcohol

All the doors in the flat were open. The one to the kitchen, the one leading upstairs and to the hallway, and every single one leading into every single room. Ian was using his speakers, blasting a Maroon 5 song and singing at the top of his lungs in the kitchen while everyone else were packing up their rooms. Y/N stood by her pinboard, taking the photos of her family, home, and friends down. She placed all of them into a folder along with her year 1 timetables, map of campus, and everything else that had helped her room seem a little more hers the time she lived there. Taking a step back, she studied her empty wall, sighing to herself as she felt a small lump form in her throat. Though she was happy to finally be moving out of Westbridge and into a house with her very good friends, she would miss it as well. This had been the first place she had managed to live on her own, her own space. She would never forget the yellow walls, the dodgy carpeted floors, and the creaky kitchen chairs.

Putting her throw over her beddings, Y/N placed one of her suitcases on her bed, opening it so she could start filling it up with all of her belongings. She opened her closet first, taking all of the clothes out that she wouldn’t need for the remaining of her time at Westbridge. Folding them neatly, she placed them one by one into the suitcase, humming along to the music and smiling as she heard Tiana and Finn’s laughters from down the corridor.

She remembered her first day at Westbridge, being so scared and feeling so far out of her comfort zone that it was impossible for her not to be constantly shaking because she was always on edge. She remembered always keeping her door locked and never socialising, and when she looked at her door now, wide open and all her flatmates milling about outside, Y/N suddenly felt very proud of herself. She had managed to come out of her introvert shell a little, feeling a little more comfortable around people she barely knew and even those she didn’t know at all. Never before had she been this as peace, not as on edge as she had always been before. Of course, she would always be anxious at all times to some degree, but now it had calmed down and it was easier for her to think clearly. Easier to give herself enough credit that she had genuine friends now that cared for her, or that in the end, everything would work out just fine. Because even though most of year 1 academically had kicked her ass, she had also found new ways to study to better herself, or new ways for her to focus better during lectures. Y/N was very ready for year 2 at Battersea, but she was also massively looking forward to summer break.

“How’s it going, hun?” Tiana asked as she walked into Y/N’s room, stepping over one of the already packed bags.

“Need to finish packing my clothes.” Y/N answered. “And then I’ll leave some for tomorrow as well. Meeting Teresa later so we can practise our set for Friday.”

“Oh yea!” Tiana sat down on the pillows at the top of Y/N’s bed, the little space left after her suitcase almost took up most of it. “You’re performing at The Junction on Friday!”

Y/N nodded, smiling at Tiana.

“Nervous about it?” Finn questioned, sitting down in the chair by Y/N’s desk.

“More nervous than I have been for anything ever.” Y/N said. “Afraid I’m going to make a right dimwit of myself while playing.”

“What are you talking about? Of course you won’t!” Tiana frowned at her flatmate. “You’re an amazing violinist.”

“You’ve never heard me play before.”

“Don’t need to hear you play to know you’re the best there is.” Tiana smiled. “What are you playing, by the way?”

“We’re going to start with Stubborn Love by The Lumineers.” Y/N said, getting more clothes out of her closet, putting those that were already folded into the suitcase right away. “And then Rather Be by Clean Bandit and-“

“-Did someone say Rather Be?” Ian asked, dancing into Y/N’s room with his speaker and phone in his hands. The song mentioned was playing and Spencer – walking behind Ian - shook his head as he almost tripped over the packed bag on the floor. Spencer sat down on the desk and Ian by the sink, turning the volume down at Finn’s request.

“We’ll all be there you on, Y/N.” Tiana reassured, smiling at Y/N who smiled back.

“I’m actually well excited about tomorrow.” Ian admitted. “Having a pint while chilling with my mates and my other mate is in charge of entertainment? Sound time.” He sighed, a slower song now playing from the speakers by his side. “It’ll be the last time the flat is properly hanging out together, won’t it? Neither Finn nor Y/N are coming back for exams in May as they don’t have any. Won’t ever chill out like this ever.”

“It’s going to be weird for sure.” Finn agreed. “Gotten so used to this shit hole now.”

“You’re all getting so sad for nothing.” Tiana rolled her eyes, watching as Y/N continued to pack her things. “We’ll hang out together again, just not as regularly.”

“I’ll have to take the trip from Cambridge,” Spencer said. “Won’t even live in London.”

“I cannot believe you’re dropping out.” Finn looked at Spencer to his left. “I mean, good for you, bruv, you know what you want and all that, but I just thought Business was right up your alley. You seem like the guy to.”

“Business is right up my alley, but I just didn’t like this specific course. Too broad, too modules things I didn’t care for. I’ll have to specify my course a little more when I apply for unis next year.” Spencer put one of his legs up on the desk, resting his arm on his knee. “It’s hard choosing a career path, especially at such a young age, you know what I mean?”

Everyone nodded and Y/N closed her suitcase, zipping it up before putting it on the floor and sitting down in her bed with Tiana.

“Feels kind of weird thinking about that I have to choose a job I’ll have to be working at for the rest of my life in the field I’m studying now.” Ian said, staring out into thin air as his mind wandered off somewhere else.

“Let’s not think about that now.” Tiana said, slapping her hands against her thighs. “Let’s chat about our first year at uni. It’s gone by so crazy fast.”

“Been bonkers.” Finn nodded, smiling a bit. “Met so many amazing people so fast, and still have three years to go. It’s bloody insane.”

“Uni has been challenging, and it’s going to get much worse as the years go by, I can only assume.” Tiana said, a smile slowly etching its way across her lips. “But so far it’s also been amazing. Think that’s why it’s gone so fast as well.”

“Any of you remember that first time we went to BOP together?” Spencer asked, groans emitting from everyone followed by laughter. “Disastrous.”

“Well, not really.” Ian chimed in, frowning.

“We weren’t even hanging together as a flat, which was the whole point of going in the first place.” Spencer frowned back.

Ian shrugged. “Snogged a well fit woman that I still don’t know the name of. A brilliant night for me.”

Y/N’s phone vibrated on her desk, making Spencer look down at it abruptly as it had clearly startled him a little. Making to get up out of bed to get it, Finn took the phone and gave it to Y/N, who smiled gratefully in return. The chatter was still going on around Y/N as she looked down at her illuminated screen. She smiled instantly. The butterflies deep inside her soul and tummy started fluttering their wings as they always did as the sight or sound of his name.

Harry A little bird whispered in my ear earlier today.

Y/N tried not to giggle and make it very obvious that she was texting Harry. Though she knew Tiana would catch her being all flustered and quiet at some point.

Y/N What’d the little bird say?

Harry That your birthday was three weeks ago.

Biting her lip, Y/N closed her phone and tried to engage in the conversation going around her room. Though her head was so far away, thinking about brown curls and green eyes only, so it was hard to hear all the words being spoken clearly, and not as if she was flying around her room in a bubble, hearing only muffled sounds. Her phone vibrated again.

Harry March 11th.

Y/N Never really cared for my birthday if I’m honest. It’s no big deal.

Harry It is to me.

Y/N couldn’t help but feel her heart swell a little at that text. Harry really felt that way? Her birthday was a big deal to him? It seemed so unrealistic for someone other than her family to really know when her birthday was, and to genuinely care and remember that information. Tiana was the only other one who knew when Y/N’s birthday was, and one Y/N had told her not to make a big scene on her birthday, Tiana had respected that completely and only called to have a chat when Y/N went home to celebrate with her family. It wasn’t that Y/N was keeping her birthday away from anyone, she would just much rather not get the attention her birthday would bring. Her phone vibrated again.

Harry The woman I’m crushing on’s birthday was a few weeks ago and I didn’t get her a card, flowers, or present. Unacceptable.

Y/N Harry, you don’t have to get me anything.

Harry Maybe not, but it isn’t about feeling like I have to. You’re a priority, not an obligation.

Y/N almost gasped, Harry’s words having its effect on her as they always had

“Okay,” Tiana nudged Y/N with her toe. “Who’re you talking to?”

“Ehh, no one.”

“Tell Ehh No One that they can wait. You’re spending time with us now.” Tiana smiled, and Y/N instantly felt a little bad that she had zoned so completely out of their conversation that she didn’t even know what the group was chatting about now.

Y/N Hanging out with the flat. Chat later x

Harry Whenever you have the time, darling. Xxx

Y/N closed her phone then, putting it under her thigh as Tiana crawled over to her, resting her head on Y/N’s shoulder. They fell into conversation with the lads again, talking till Ian’s speaker went out of battery an everyone’s tummies started grumbling. Though Y/N was physically in her room, talking to all her flatmates, her mind was somewhere else entirely. It was somewhere in Cotton Row; somewhere where a beautiful brown-haired bloke sat alone in his room doing nothing. Whenever she would catch herself slipping away to think about Harry and him texting her, she would pull herself right back to reality with all her friends. They had been right, it would be a while till they would all be hanging out like this away, so Y/N had to be present while she still could.

At last, they all decided to go to the kitchen and make some dinner in half an hour, but to just tidy theirs rooms properly first beforehand. As the lads walked out, Tiana remained in Y/N’s room, and judging by the very serious expression on her face, Y/N closed the door.

“You okay, T?” Y/N sat down in her bed again, facing her best friend.

Tiana looked over at Y/N, a little lost for a few seconds before she opened her mouth. “I need to tell you what happened with Danny.”

Y/N had almost forgotten completely about him, but by the tone of Tiana’s voice it was clear that was far from her case. With her eyes closed for a few seconds, breathing in and out to calm down, Tiana tried to find the correct words.

“You deserve to know.”

“If you don’t want to tell me, Tiana-“

“-I do. I want you to know because you’re the only one besides myself I want to know about this.” Tiana explained, hand resting against her chest as she talked. “I trust you to know every single little detail about me. To know me well.”

Y/N smiled encouragingly, taking Tiana’s hands to tell her by touch that she was there with her. It took some time for Tiana to open her mouth and talk, but once she finally did, Y/N seemed to finally understand the whole picture. As Y/N rubbed her thumbs over Tiana’s hands, watching her calm down with each stroke, Y/N knew that she had to be patient for Tiana to tell her. No use pushing her for information she would eventually receive.

“I told Danny about the pregnancy scare in November.” Tiana started, looking at something behind Y/N. “About how you came to the clinic with me, and that if he wanted he could even see the test results if he wanted to.”

Y/N frowned.

“Just so he wouldn’t start asking about them later, which I kind of knew he would anyway.” Tiana shrugged. “Anyway, I…” She stopped, collecting herself for a few seconds before she went on. “I went to his flat to tell him and he lost his mind. So I said what had been on my mind for weeks by that point, something I was certain of, and that was… that I loved him.”

Y/N’s entire body hurt thinking about this whole scene. Tiana laying herself bare in front of Danny.

“And of course he didn’t say it back.” Tiana laughed a little. “Because why would he fall in love with his fuck buddy, right? Why get emotionally attached to someone when you can remain ice cold?”

“T…” Y/N sighed, feeling Tiana tighten the grip she had on her hands.

“So, to sum up:” Tiana looked at Y/N, trying to smile, but it failed to meet her eyes. “I told Danny about thinking I was pregnant, but that I wasn’t, and he freaked out. Then I told him I loved him, and he stopped freaking out to tell me he didn’t feel the same way.”

Y/N was silent, not really knowing what the appropriate thing would be to say in a situation like this one.

“Told me this always happened to him and he didn’t know what he was doing wrong for all the birds he fucked to fall in love with him.” Tiana’s glance was distance as she was undoubtably reliving the whole scene in her head. “Asked me if it was something specific he did, and I just told him I didn’t know why I love him. I told him I just did, that it had come out of nowhere, my feelings.” She closed her eyes. “And then I did the mistake of asking what he would have done had I been pregnant.”

Y/N knew she’d hate he answer.

“’Would’ve left. I’m not old enough to have a kid, I’m still in uni’, he said.” Tiana opened her eyes again, not looking at Y/N as she continued. “When I teared up, he stood there in silence not comforting me or talking to me, just waiting for me to leave. I have never felt more worthless than I did after that. I’m so glad it was close to Christmas so I could go home to my family and forget about uni for a bit. Would never forget about you, Y/N, but…” Tiana sighed, looking at Y/N now. “Sometimes I wish I could start uni all over again so I would’ve made the decision not to talk to Danny ever. Would’ve made myself stay far away from that wank-stain.”

Y/N saw the blankness in Tiana’s eyes, and the pool of tears that were forming at the bottom of them. Leaning in, Y/N embraced Tiana and brought her close into a tight hug. It took a minute or two for Tiana to finally cry into Y/N’s shoulder, to repeat over and over again ‘I wish I’d never met him’ or ‘I hate him so much’. It broke everything within Y/N into a million tiny little pieces. To know someone had hurt her best friend this bad for her still to be sad about it even months after, it took everything for Y/N not to cry with her. She had to be strong now and show Tiana that she was there for her, that she always had her shoulder to cry on whatever happened. They heard the lads walking into the kitchen to make some dinner together, but Tiana and Y/N stayed back until Tiana’s cheeks were try, eyes less red, and until her spirits were back up again. Well, till her spirits were somewhat back to normal. Y/N got a few tissues and dried Tiana’s cheeks, shushing her when she started to speak. They were going to sit in silence until Tiana’s sobs that shook shaking her body like a hiccup every few seconds, had stopped. Only then were they ready to walk into the kitchen and to the others.

“Thank you,” Tiana almost whispered. “For listening and being here for me.”

“Always, Tiana.” Y/N said, throwing the tissues at her bin, but missing massively. Both of them laughed a little, though Tiana was quick to look down at her hands as she opened her mouth, then closed it again. Opened, then closed.

“Could not hold it in for any longer.” Tiana said, looking at Y/N. “Know I do not owe you an explanation for anything or to share everything with you, but I want to.”

Their hands found one another, intertwining instantly.

“Best friends don’t have secrets.” Tiana smiled.

It took a second before Y/N smiled back. “Best friends don’t have secrets.”

Friday, 10 April 2015

The Junction was an old pub in Battersea, London, a one-minute walk from Clapham Junction. It was dimly lit, with tellies in each corner for sport events, and old grunge dark wooden floors, tables, chairs, and bar counter. In one end stood the small stage live acts performed, while everywhere else was occupied by run-down furniture and loud laughter. It smelled old when you entered, as if the building had been standing for hundreds of years, and Y/N thought that might just be the case. It was a friendly place, the second Y/N and Teresa stepped through the door, the woman working behind the bar gave them a wide smile. Teresa walked up to introduce them, and while she was talking, Y/N looked around the pub. It was still too early in the afternoon for groups to come have a pint with their mates, but a few old men sat by one of the windows leading to the busy St John’s Hill outside, cars and people rushing by to get home for the weekend.

It wasn’t even busy yet, but as Y/N surveyed the room, taking in every detail about the place and every seating area where someone would sit later, she felt her heart beating uncomfortably loudly in her ears. She balled her hands into fists in her cardigan pockets, trying to tell herself that everything would be alright. Just close your eyes and don’t think about how many people will be watching you. But it was impossible not to think about all those people that would be watching, all those eyes that would be studying her every move and analysing her body and clothes and… and… just her in general. Sometimes Y/N wondered why she had chosen to study music at all, because it was inevitable that she would end up performing in front of people all her life.

Closing her eyes for a few seconds, she tried to calm herself down by repeating ‘you’ve come so far, you’ve grown so much, the nerves will be over in no time if you just relax’. Though she had come out of her shell a little when attending uni, her stage fright never seemed would truly ever go away no matter how hard she tried. She would always be an anxious person. Opening her eyes, she looked at calm Teresa who was already looking at Y/N, giving her that relaxed and encouraging smile she so often gave her. Good thing, Y/N thought, I’m doing this with Teresa.

The bartender - Glenda her name was – helped the girls set everything up. She asked loads of questions about their uni experience and which songs they planned on playing. An incredibly nice woman, Y/N thought to herself, smiling as Glenda told a joke Teresa found hilarious. The brown-haired woman, whose hair was greying at the roots, walked back behind the bar counter as someone else walked into the pub. Following the two older men was familiar faces, though, and Y/N’s smile broaden instantly.

“I’m your biggest fan!” Finn said a bit too loudly, running over to stand before the stage where Teresa and Y/N were. “Can I please have a picture?!”

“The cringiest man alive, innit?” Tiana rolled her eyes, but laughed once Finn rolled his eyes back at her. “How are you girls doing? Been rehearsing at all yet?”

“Not yet.” Teresa said. “Think we’re just going to jump straight into it, wouldn’t you say, Y/N?” She looked over at Y/N who nodded, biting her lips together.

“You’ll be amazing, Y/N.” Spencer smiled, giving her a wink before him and Ian walked over to the bar to get something to drink.

“Nothing to be scared about, yea?” Finn said. “Imagine you’re just the two of you rehearsing.”

Y/N nodded again, taking a deep breath.

“Where’s Annie?” Teresa asked Tiana.

“Went home to Linton earlier today, think she might’ve forgotten about you lot’s performance, to be honest. But don’t take it to heart.”

“You going home to Hawkley after this?” Finn asked Y/N as Teresa and Tiana started up their own conversation beside them.

Y/N nodded, crossing her arms over her chest. “My family will drive once my little brother is done college for the day.”

Finn smiled. “I’ve yet to meet that man, bet he’s a proper lad.”

“The best person I know.”

“Even better than me?” Finn furrowed his brows as if offended and placed both his hands on his chest.

Y/N laughed and so did he.

“Tough choosing between the two of you, not going to lie.” Y/N smiled, scratching at something on her shoulder blade. “You going Brighton after this then?”

“Nah,” Finn shook his head, showing his hands into his jean pockets. “I’ll go home tomorrow. Told mum I would stay another week at uni just to say goodbye to everyone and to the flat and stuff before we leave for the summer. Going to surprise her by just knocking on the door at home and startling her.”

“Startle her?”

“Yea.” Finn chuckled. “Going to either like jump out from the bush by the front door or scream in her face.”

“Oh my goodness.” Y/N said, making Finn laugh. “You’re the worst kind of son.”

“But she’s going to be happy to see me. Both my mums would forgive me for scaring the living shit out of them.”

Y/N nodded. “’Both your mums’?” She realised that it was probably a weird thing to focus on, him saying that, because his parents might be divorced, and she might’ve poured some salt on unhealed wounds.

“Got two mums.” Finn explained, smiling proudly. “Dad died when I was very young, and mum found the second love of her life in someone else. Been raised by them two ever since.”

Y/N smiled, hearing Finn talk to highly of all his three parents calming her nerves for her performance and making her focus on something else entirely.

“You’ve got to meet them, they’re the loveliest people you’ll ever talk to.”

“Then you’ve got to come camping in Hawkley, right by the lake on the outside of my parents’ property.-“

“-Shut up, Y/N, that would be fucking sick.” Finn grinned. “Boys, you heard that?” Finn nudged Tiana, both her and Teresa looking at him. “Y/N suggested we camp together. Sounds like a sound time?”

“Oh, my God, yes!” Tiana gasped, beaming. “Could we sit in that boat on your lake then?”

“Sure.”

“I’m so excited already!”

“Could do a small tour then.” Finn suggested, looking back at Y/N. “Camp at yours for a few days, then take the train to Brighton, then back up to London.”

“What about Bath?” Tiana asked, furrowing her brows at Finn. “What about my hometown?”

“We going to visit everyone’s hometowns, you mean? Will be a bit of a trek travelling all the way up north to Manchester for Harry, won’t it?”

And just as his name was mentioned and the two of them started discussing all of this, the door into The Junction opened again. Wade walked first, Sai following right on his heels and Harry last. Wade looked over his shoulder to talk to his two mates, making Sai laugh at something as the two of them walked toward Finn by the stage. Harry was quiet however, only the slightest smile on his face as he caught Y/N’s eye. As he strolled toward her, Y/N took this time to study all of him, something she rarely let herself do as it would only boost his already enormous ego. He was wearing a black tee shirt tucked into black trousers, his infamous chain hanging from the free belt hoops. His trainers were stark white, standing in huge contrast to the rest of his outfit and his black leather satchel, the strap hanging on his left shoulder, draping over his chest till it rested on his hip. He always dressed so incredibly well, all his clothes looking expensive and luxurious. Made Y/N wonder about his parents and how much money he grew up with, because it had obviously been a very rich household.

Y/N looked down at her own outfit, feeling like she hadn’t dressed up for this at all. A mustard button up mini skirt reaching mid-thigh and wrapping around her hip, white milkmaid top tucked into it, and her white Vans. She had a grey cardigan as well, but it was resting on top the violin case behind her, she didn’t see the point in wearing it as she was already sweating heaps at the thought of performing. It was an incredibly warm day in April, and though it had been quite windy on the walk here, the sun was still warm on Y/N’s skin the whole way. Teresa was wearing an orange crop top with blue jeans, and the whole gang seemed to be dressed for summer as all the long sleeves were gone, bare skin on display for the sun to do its work. The sun shone in through the window of The Junction, lighting up the already dark interior.

“Finnster.” Sai said, placing both his hands on Finn’s shoulders. “Looking bloody dashing as ever.”

“Was wondering if my bum looked good in these jeans.” Finn looked over his shoulder, attempting to get a good look at his arse. “If I attracted your attention, I would assume it did.”

Sai howled with laughter while Finn greeted both Harry and Wave with some weird handshake-hug all men seemed to do when they met their mates. As soon as Harry had said his hello to Finn, he glanced back at Y/N, the conversation between the rest already going. Spencer and Ian finally walked over to the gang, hugging the new arrivals, but Harry didn’t even seem to notice them. He smiled up at Y/N, resting one of his hands on the strap by his chest.

“Hi.” He said, voice as soft as velvet.

Y/N smiled back. “Hi.”

“Alright?”

“Nervous, you?”

Harry let out a small chuckle. “About performing?”

Y/N nodded, letting her arms fall to her sides. “Never really done it in front of an audience like this before, don’t know how people are going to react or if they’ll even listen at all.”

“You’re scared people won’t listen?” Harry raised his eyebrows, not mockingly but out of pure curiosity.

Y/N chuckled a little at herself. “Isn’t it weird?” She asked. “I’m both scared people won’t listen to me because I’ve been preparing for this for weeks, but also terrified that people will.”

“It’s not weird.” Harry shook his head twice. “You’re just nervous about first time performing at a pub. Normal to be a bit disoriented and out of it when it’s your first time doing anything.”

“Think so?”

“Yea.” Harry smiled again. “Wouldn’t be fun if everything you ever did didn’t make you at least a little uncomfortable at first. What’s life without a little challenge, yea?”

“Can’t say I agree. Don’t really like challenging myself.”

Harry laughed. “Well, enjoy challenging yourself today when you perform.”

Y/N ran both hands through her hair, smiling a little at Harry. “I won’t enjoy it the least bit at first, but hopefully I’ll ease into it at some point.”

“That’s my girl.”

Y/N’s heart did a loop and stopped for a second before she regained consciousness, staring into Harry’s green eyes that she ever got tired of studying the shade of. That’s my girl. Y/N swallowed, the tips of her fingers tingling to touch him. She yearned to feel his torso under her fingertips as she had done in the study room weeks ago. Longed for him so close to her that they mingled into one, floating together into a universe neither of them knew the name of but loved all the same. Missed his lips, even though they had only kissed once. It felt so overwhelming and weird for Y/N to want someone this bad, but it was impossible for her to even try to stop herself from admitting just how completely Harry had gotten to her.

“Y/N-“ Harry started, but was quickly interrupted by Sai.

“-Mate, you owe me a pint from last weekend. I’m thirsty.”

“Fine.” Harry said, giving Y/N one last glance before he walked over to the bar with Sai who clapped his hands together, ready to pick out the beer he wanted.

“It’s time.” Teresa said, and Y/N noticed for the first time in a while that the pub had started to fill up quite a bit. It was 6pm now, people were either at home eating dinner or on their way out for a drink with their friends. Y/N turned around and got the violin out of its case, placing it on her shoulder. Behind Teresa stood Y/N’s note stand, and she glued her eyes to the notes she had learned by heart over the last few weeks. Just to make sure she knew all of them and that she wouldn’t screw everything up. She noticed her hands shaking and sweat forming by the edge of her hairline and cupid brow.

“Hey,” Teresa whispered, the others having gone to sit down in one of the booths by the windows nearby. “It’s going to be okay, yea? You’re okay.”

Y/N nodded. And bringing her bow up to her violin, she started playing Stubborn Love by The Lumineers. Her eyes instantly fell closed, she was not for the life of her going to see anyone’s expressions as she played. She knew Teresa was watching her and probably the rest of her gang as well, and even though Y/N knew they would mean no harm and would most likely be impressed, she couldn’t help thinking they would be underwhelmed.

“She’ll lie and steal and cheat, and beg you from her knees, make you think she means it this time.” Teresa sang, voice as graceful as ever. “She’ll tear a hole in you, the on you can’t repair. But I still love her, I don’t really care.”

With her eyes closed, it was easy for Y/N to escape her body and The Junction and all the eyes on her as she created music. Suddenly she was floating along the notes on the paper she knew was right there if she dared open her eyes; she was flying along with the waves of emotion music could manifest. Undoubtably swaying along with the music, Y/N almost felt herself smiling. It was so liberating to create temporary art; art that wasn’t there to be seen, but to be heard, felt, and experienced. The nervousness she had felt earlier died down a little as they finished the song and the entire bar erupted into applause and hoots and whistles. Y/N opened her eyes and looked over at Teresa who was already beaming at her. She smiled as well.

“Thank you.” Teresa said into the microphone. “This next song is Blackbird by The Beatles.”

The two shared a few seconds looking at each other to make sure both were ready. Y/N started playing the second song of their set, closing her eyes this time as well. Teresa sang her heart out and Y/N played to the same effect. The two girls worked well together, knowing each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and it was clear that they understood each other as musicians as well as people. Never did Y/N open her eyes, but after a month and more just practising these songs every day and knowing them well, she didn’t really have to. Once she remembered a music sheet, she’d remembered it till the day she died. They were soon halfway through their set which meant they’d get a break. As she lowered her violin when they were done, the whole bar clapping once again, Y/N heard the door into the pub creak open but didn’t pay it much attention. Hunching down to put the violin back into its case, she turned back around to an older man standing by the booth her friends were sitting in. Teresa was getting her purse so she could buy something to eat and drink, but Y/N couldn’t move as she watched Harry get up from his corner seat.

The older man’s hair was a dark shade of grey, wearing a blue business suit and carrying a folder of sorts. He looked serious, turning around as Harry stood so he could walk outside. Harry followed, not even sparing Y/N or the rest of the group a second glance. He seemed tense, shoulders set higher than they usually were and his hands in the pockets of his black trousers. Y/N felt a weird sense of something being wrong. Very wrong. Harry and the man stopped outside the front of the pub, and through the right side windows, Y/N could see the man talking to Harry in a tone Y/N knew she didn’t like.

“Ready for a bite, Y/N?” Teresa asked, but once she saw Y/N staring out the window at Harry she abruptly stopped. “What’s up? Who’s that?”

Y/N shook her head. “Don’t know.”

They both watched as the older man gave the folder over to Harry who opened it discreetly, looking inside at its contents. Y/N couldn’t see Harry’s facial expressions, only the back of his head, and it was near killing her because her curiosity was about to get the better of her. Getting her cardigan and putting it on, she walked over to her mates, Teresa following close behind.

“You are amazing!” Finn grinned. “Let me buy you both a cocktail, yea?”

“Whose Harry talking to?” Y/N asked, motioning with her thumb over her shoulder.

“His dad.” Sai said, gripping at his slight beard. “Weird bloke.”

Y/N frowned a little, crossing her arms again.

“If you want to find out for yourself what’s going on, Harry has my wallet in his purse.” Finn said, pointing towards the door.

“It’s called a satchel, not a purse.” Tiana corrected, making Finn repeat her only in an exaggerated high-pitched voice.

“Want to go out there or not? Want me to?” Finn raised his eyebrows at Y/N, and though she would never do this usually, the whole situation didn’t sit right with her and she needed to know what was going on. So, nodding her head at Finn, Y/N turned around and walked toward the door of the pub. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to find out or if her feeling weird about all of this was even correct. What if it was all innocent and his dad had just come here to show him something? What if he was there for another reason that wasn’t sketchy at all? Maybe Y/N was just overthinking everything as she usually was? What if she was and her questioning Harry’s father’s intentions would cause Harry to doubt what he had with her? Y/N didn’t know what logic was as she stepped toward the door, placing her hand to it and pushing it open. She didn’t hear anything distinct at first, the trailer driving by muffling out most noise around her. But as it was driving away, a quieter street was left in its wake. And Y/N could finally hear what they were talking about.

“…just saying it- showing you this, because I want you to be aware.”

“And you don’t need to make me aware of anything.” Harry answered his dad in such a vicious tone it almost made Y/N wince. Slowly she stepped out into the street, looking over at Harry and his dad who were staring daggers at each other.

“I won’t throw these papers away. They hold-“

Harry’s dad stopped speaking once the door closed beside Y/N and his eyes landed on her. The seconds that followed when he looked her over and slowly glanced back at his son; the seconds Y/N thought somehow turned into hours.

“Y/N Rose Picot is here for you, Harry.” He said. “I will leave you to it.”

Without even sparing Y/N another glance, Harry’s dad turned on his heels and walked away, his back to them. Harry whipped around, wide eyes landing on Y/N and once he saw her, he instantly eased. The anger Y/N saw somewhere in his green irises evaporated, and he let go of a deep sigh.

“Harry,” Y/N said, palms sweaty as she balled them into fists by her side. “What’s going on?”

Harry shook his head. “Nothing, dad is just intense. Don’t worry about it.”

“He knew who I was.”

Harry stopped a little, as if he only just realised that his dad had said her full name. First, middle, and surname. “He’s just good with faces. He knows my friends from Facebook profile pictures.”

Y/N didn’t have a profile picture on Facebook.

“Does your father know who I am, Harry?” Y/N’s heart was beating so fast it was a wonder she was even standing by this point.

“He knows a lot of people, Y/N. Let’s go inside-“

“-Why does he know me?”

Harry frowned. “He keeps track of all my friends, that’s just the way he is. He’s a little fucked up, what do you want me to fucking say?”

Y/N frowned back, taking a step back from Harry. “Keeps track of your friends…?”

Harry just stared at Y/N, lips parted as if he knew what he had just said sounded not only shady, but incredibly messed up and not at all good in any way. Y/N took another step away from him, swallowing to maintain the calm she had kept up for so long. She didn’t know how she was going to make it through the second half of her and Teresa’s set because she couldn’t stop shaking.

“Like… if they’re good for you?”

“Y/N, there really is no use arguing about this.” Harry said, walking toward her, but she only walked away from him. Harry stopped, hurt crossing his face.

“Then tell me what this was all about and I’ll stop pressing you for information about it.”

Harry groaned, running a hand through his hair and completely messing it up. “I fucking won’t because it meant nothing.”

“Your father knows who I am!” Y/N was aware she was shouting; aware people were watching them from both inside the pub and from everywhere on the street. “And I’ve never met him before! Of course it means something!”

Harry fell quiet, only looking at Y/N in complete shock. She had never raised her voice about anything before, and hearing her be mad at him, upset about something he did, seemed to make everything about him freeze. Y/N completely forgot about Finn’s wallet as she walked inside and straight for the bar. Teresa and Tiana were quick to come over, both looking absolutely horrified. They stood on either side of Y/N, Tiana’s arm around her waist and Teresa holding her hand. Never had anyone seen Y/N this mad or shaken up because it rarely happened. Y/N didn’t get this upset about much, she was usually very good at hiding what she was thinking and feeling, but this had taken her so off guard that it was impossible for her not to have a reaction to all of this.

“Y/N.”

It was Harry. And Y/N didn’t even want to turn around to look at him.

“Y/N-“

“-Make him leave.” Y/N mumbled, only Tiana hearing it as she rested her chin on Y/N’s shoulder.

“Harry, you need to go.” Tiana said, voice soft as she didn’t yet know what had transpired between him and Y/N. Y/N didn’t know the look on Harry’s face as he walked over to the booth and gave Finn’s his wallet back. Didn’t know what he said to them when they asked what had happened. Didn’t know if he even looked back once he left the pub, on his way god knows where for a reason Y/N could never guess, she assumed. Both Teresa and Tiana asked what was going on, what Harry had said and why his father had been here. But Y/N only shook her head, defeated and confused and hurt. She closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath, trying to calm herself down enough to eat a proper meal and finish the set. Though she didn’t know how she was going to do that when what had just happened, Harry’s dad, and Harry, were all she could think about.

“Careful.” Allison said, voice stern as Edward walked up the small step and into Y/N’s university flat.

“Mum, I’ve used crutches before. I know how to use them.” He looked over at Y/N and rolled his eyes, only making Y/N smile back.

“Fully aware of that, honey, but I’m still scared you’ll fall over.”

“Does it look like I’m falling over?” Edward asked, making his way through the second door and into the downstairs corridor. Walking to his left and toward the open door into Y/N’s room, Y/N could make out a smile on her brother’s face. Most bags and suitcases were in the car already, only a single bag left that Y/N would be taking on her back after this. Edward stopped in the doorway, looking around first, trying to take it all in, Y/N supposed. Her brother walked further in on his crutches, limping as he did so, though he always did that because he leaned most of his body weight on his crutches. Edward had learned how to walk on crutches when he was 10, and had mastered it throughout the years. Though his parents rarely let him walk on crutches as they didn’t want him to fall and hurt. Everyone followed right after Edward, letting him look around the room Y/N had lived in for her first year at university. He walked over to her chair and sat down, groaning as he came in contact with the chair. Smiling, he glanced around the room and looked at her pinboard where she had hung his paintings and pictures of the two of them together. He stared at the bed she had laid in most times they had FaceTimed, and the mirror where she would send him a goodnight Snap with toothpaste foaming around her mouth.

“This is how you saw your flat when you first moved in, when you were sad I didn’t get to see your room.” Edward mused, looking over at Y/N sitting on the bare bed. “And now I get to see it like you first saw it.”

Y/N smiled, leaning over and taking her brother’s hand in hers, kissing it before just holding it and looking around. Their parents smiled at them and Allison brought her phone out, snapping a picture of the two in Y/N’s empty dorm room one first and last time. They had asked how the performance had gone when they picked her up by Clapham Junction, and Y/N had given them the simple answer, which was to not elaborate on the situation with Harry and everything in between. So she told them it had gone well, and gave them all a rundown of the songs she had played and Edward made her promise to play him some when they reached Hawkley that same evening. Y/N had smiled at him and nodded.

She lost herself in thoughts of Hawkley. Of the endless fields where endless possibilities awaited; in her boat by the lake when the sun would beam down on her and a book in hand, music playing from her phone; pushing Edward on the paths through the forest around their property and having the best time ever. She had missed her home, missed being in the country and not in the biggest city in the United Kingdom. It would be good for her to relax without the constant buzz around her, pressure from uni, and everything else in between. Sure, she would miss London to some extent, but right now she’d much rather be in Hawkley with her family. Where she belonged and would always belong. Where there was no Harry and no trace of what had happened at The Junction.

Y/N bit her lip together, not allowing herself to even think of Harry until she was safe at home in her room, about to go to bed, when she could cry for hours.

“Want me to take that bag for you, poppet?” George asked, pointing at the last bag on her bed.

“No, that’s quite alright, dad, I’ll take that one myself.” Y/N said, giving her father a smile as he helped Edward into a standing position. Her little brother had been so eager to see her room, and that was the whole point of bringing crutches and even being in here one last time. Y/N watched as Edward made his way out of her first home away from home, made sure everything was alright before she got to her feet and put the bag on her back. Placing the chair by her desk, leaning over to close her window one last time, and hunching down to get her doorstop from under the door, Y/N finally stood in her doorway by herself. She looked at her room, feeling a lump form in her throat again as she knew this would be the last time she’d have the chance to look at it and be here. Never would she tread into flat 34 of Westbridge Halls again. Never would she live with all these amazing people and complain about the mould in the kitchen again. Never would she play her violin in this room or write an essay by her desk.

She knew she would be happy in her new house next year, knew there was nothing to be sappy about. But Y/N hated change. More so, hated leaving something behind that she had much liked having around. So, inhaling deeply, allowing herself to smile as she looked at room 3 of flat 34 one last time, she stepped into the corridor, let the door fall shut, and locked it for the very last time.

TAGLIST

@swayingnoodlelove @littlestyles @showk1ndness @sydneysuit @hallwayharry @emotionally-imbruised @fuckyeahimahobbit @beksjewels @harryisadogperson @harryrocksagoodsuit @ifiwereaboy2323 @tiostyles @maroonmolly @harrysroguecurl @awomanindeniall @justsaying20 @ot4narrie @miss-nxvxcaine @sunflowersandrockstars @hard-on-harry @emma070900 @shitibitmytonge @always-jackedup @rainbowbutterflyboy @shegotthesalt @harrytreatspeoplewithkindnesss @mleestiles @bloodcastle30155 @harryskiwi2 @brielyse11 @for-fucks-sake-h @treat-harry-with-love @permanentllyharry @flooome @harryfeatcalum @harrystrugglestache @hydra-barnes @violets-parma @shadowsndaisies @messyherz @dancinglikeamadpersoninthedark @kakaym @loveandyourstrulyh @onedirectionhoe @yes-daddy-i-willl @itsnoneofyourbusiness94 @stylisthazel @givemesomemore @thelux47 @its-all-about-harrystyles @blogjustlauren @friendlyneighborhoodron @stylesfantasy @miraclesoflove @belladonna-styles 

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[delicrieux]

pairing: kane x f!mc

fandom: playchoices, the elementalists

summary: after the confrontational and scandalous tea party, (name) finds herself in a wonderland-esque place when her life had just started becoming boring again.

warnings: uh... age gap i guess?? 

words: 3k (i snapped)

author’s note: jfc this took so long. hours of work. and a few different versions (one was set in a labyrinth but i decided to go with this instead). hope you like it! tagged all the people that wanted. you can view this as kane totally manipulating the mc ..he probably is tbh. anyway, this will suffice till TE is back in a few weeks. i regret nothing for stanning my eccentric mustache man.

tags: @tilliesmarshall - @somegdchoices - @lastfirstcupcake - @peach-space - @magicpijama

feedback is always appreciated xoxo

masterlist | buy me coffee☕

It had been a terrible week full to the brim with nothing but stress and worry. To make it all seemingly worse, none of her friends bore their gentleness with her, and their jubilant smiles, daydream gazes, bell like laughter was washed away by autumn rain. There must be something in the water, they all mutely concluded one cloudy morning during breakfast, with their lips sealed and eyes sunken into fresh cups of coffee. Yet it is as if they all shared a telepathic line, acutely aware of what their seatmate was thinking: Why is no one talking?

In silence they had all decided that this is simply one of those weeks where nothing goes right, and the only salvation is solitude. Even the ever social Shreya seemed to count her words, rejoicing once she had reached their limit. And Aster, ever the tender soul, wore less blooming flowers as days slipped into nights, appearing a bit haunted and even ill. (Name), too, was hardly any better. She is the Sun, the brightest star in the sky, but her light had reduced into nothing but a pale, sickly glow. There must be something in the air, they had mussed wide awake at midnight, listening to the wind howling outside their bedrooms. Nevertheless hope poked and prodded their heads with an impatient thought: Surely this will all blow over and chaos shall resume as it has, never to be disturbed again…right?

It is late again; the evening is inky, full of stars. (Name) sits beside her writing desk with her head in her hands, feeling herself slip into madness once the words in her textbook swim again. She swallows a fit of frustration that wanted to escape with a curse. This will not do. It would appear that being detached from Pend Pals would grant more time to focus on studies, though it has been the last thing on her mind and now she has an exam the next day and she knows absolutely nothing. There is a secret within her heart; a secret that no one knows and cannot know, because she realises just how silly it is. She feels as if the walls are closing in on her; that this room is too small, too crowded, though she is, and has been for most of the week, completely alone.

A knock on the door makes her jolt, and raspy she squeaks, “Come in!” though she fills with dread at the mere prospect of talking to anyone. The visitor waits for no other confirmation and the door opens to reveal her twin, displeased as she always is, glaring down at her.

“What’s wrong with you?”

She blinks, taken aback by the hostile question “My… I’m just…not feeling that well.” She explains clumsily, “Is there something you need? Because I really have to study.”

“Sure you do. Mind telling the truth now?”

“What?”

“Don’t ‘what’ me. I know you. Everyone’s been acting weird. You especially. You’re not as…” She gazes her up and down, searching for the right word, “-dramatic as you used to be.”

“It’s just stress.”

“If it was just stress then you’d be crying that you are literally dying.” Atlas crosses her arms over her chest, her displeasure momentarily melting into concern before she fixes her stern façade again,” So…talk to me. Or whatever. I can’t let you be out of it when Kane’s on the loose. Even if you pulled the stupidest move imaginable and tried to stop Alma from killing him.”

Irritation seizes her breath and she grits her teeth, “Yeah so I got a little heated, sorry for wanting to settle things peacefully. He’s literally the only one that gave me any sort of answers. And –just-ugh! What is with you and constantly being on your guard? Fighting? Can’t I just be a normal student and worry about normal things? Like exams?”

“Normal was thrown out the window when our mother—“

“You know, for someone who hates her so much, you sure don’t shut up about her.”

Atlas pales, speechless. Before she can fire back, (Name) adds, “Just leave me alone. Try to focus on your studies. Because the only danger we’ll be facing soon is Harrington’s stupidly difficult questions.” She turns back to the book, “Goodnight, Atlas.”

Of course Atlas would notice the change – she had always considered herself an outsider, even now, but being rejected by her sister is too much, and the hurt in her eyes betrays it. (Name) can’t see it, the glister of angry tears, but she can feel it; can feel Atlas’ magick pulse about her, unruly. The door shuts and silence falls over her bedroom, as if Atlas was never here in the first place. (Name) sighs. Perhaps she should not have said that. She does not know what came over her. This is all simply too much.

The witching hour has long passed and (Name) haunts the hallways of Penderghast. Strange illusions play on the walls; the air is cool, fresh, much better than the stuffy, perfumed atmosphere of the dorms. Here she feels a bit better. She wonders if there are any professors roaming about this late, and if there are, will she be in trouble if they catch her. There is a sharp ring in her ear that distracts her, one she had tried again and again to get rid of by shutting her eyes, hitting her head, though all it did is worsen the ache and vertigo nearly took her.

A playful gust of wind brushes the back of her neck and she shivers, eyes lighting up from the all too familiar magick. Kane. Her hearts leaps in her chest, though is it from fright or excitement or both she has no clue. At the very end of the hallway she notes an open door, the only open door, from which moonlight spills onto the floor. She moves as if enchanted, enraptured by curiosity, suddenly eager to speak, to run, to rejoice, when just this morning she had barely gotten out of bed.

She enters the Hall of Mirrors and her reflection meets her in a thousand ornate forms. His magick lingers here as if a personal invitation. She finds its source easily, and turns to her side with a grin. It almost feels odd to smile after frowning for the whole week. The tall mirror’s surface ripples as if water. No signs of danger, or perhaps she misses all of them, or she does sense it and embraces it, because she feels the same exuberant energy she always does return to her, as if she’s soaking it all in like a sponge. With a spring in her step she jumps through the mirror, not caring if she is to be eaten by sharks a moment later.

The mirror turns solid behind her, and, slowly, the door to the Hall of Mirrors shuts with a ghastly creak.

She feels a rush of verve pass through her, nearly taking her breath with it. The world is a distortion that clears into a detailed, vibrant scene. The forest oozes in dazing scents; The sky is candy, luminous - shy pinks, spry lemons, calm blues – held by trees so tall she cannot see their tops; flowers, some as big as she is, some as small as the ant crawling on her shoelace, grow and radiate in gentle rainbow colours; birds chirp their melodic songs. It is warm here, humid, as if in a magickal rainforest.

There is no paved path, and with her magick she swiftly parts bushes and flowers alike into a makeshift archway. What is this place? She wonders, taking in the scenery with every step, Am I really somewhere or…in an illusion? A white rabbit darts across her path and startled she jumps. She senses him before she sees him, and with her heart in her throat she cautiously waves her hand and the trees bend into a walkway, revealing a pocket of large, closed space, littered with ruins of old buildings and chest pieces that the forest had claimed as their own ages ago.

“Apologies, my dear (Name).”  The wind carries his voice to her in a velvety whisper, “I would have come to greet you sooner, but I was not sure if it was you.” Kane tips his hat in curtsy, a smile stretching on his lips as he eyes her curiously, “I am, however, absolutely delighted to see you again.” In a grand gesture he motions to the area, “Well? Do you like it? I was thinking of all sorts of places to show you after our little tea party. I’m hoping no…distractions this time, however.”

“It’s definitely beautiful,” She agrees. He is visibly delighted, “And…no distractions. I came alone.”

“Wonderful. You were the only one invited.”

There is just something about him that is deliberately strange. He has a child-like exuberance about him, which can become extremely chaotic if not contained. But she hardly minds chaos. In fact, after their last encounter, she grew to enjoy it. Who cares if this is an illusion? What does it matter if the sky falls on her head? Who is to say this is not just a dream? Why spoil the fun with all this thinking, Atlas is the thinker, she is the doer. Two sisters can’t be too much alike – that would be unbelievably dull.

The same tender smile does not leave his face, and with one last longing look, he spins on his heel, his first somewhat contained excitement now spurring into arrogance, “Join me!” He exclaims, jutting his elbow for her to take, not once worrying she might not.

(Name) glides to him as if enchanted, wrapping her arm around his. Hints of his cologne hit her nose with a dreamful inhale; the fabric of his jacket is silky and smooth. They fall into step, she too distracted by his closeness to realise how her magick reacts to his: it dances, sways, traces behind them like a cape.

“I was anxious you might have gotten into trouble for defending me.” He says, catching her gaze, “Though I am incredibly grateful.”

She gulps, tries to think about her answer, yet his eyes – what a peculiar colour – are much too beguiling, “Well…There were…No fights, per se.” She hums, quickly glancing away, “We just all…stopped talking.”

“That is quite unfortunate. Though, it is as I told you, (Name). I will be your friend even when no one else will.”

His words bring calmness and a sense of security, however odd that might be, and she smiles to herself, hoping he would not notice. But he does. “Don’t suppose you want to dance with Wood Nymphs? Smoke cigars with the Caterpillar? Cause a massive storm?”

“Wood Nymphs? Cater—You want to destroy this place?

“I’m simply suggesting activities, my dear (Name). I want you to enjoy yourself. I want you to be happy.”

They lock eyes for a long moment, and her heart begins to beat just a little faster.

“But I am.” She admits in a whisper, feeling rose bloom on her cheeks, “I…haven’t had this much fun since…forever.”

“And you have no idea how long is forever if you have no one to share it with.”

There is a pause before she speaks, “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“What do you truly want, Kane?” He perks at the mention of his name, quirks his lips upwards.

“The same thing you want. I want to have fun. Your friends and…colleagues pin me for the evil type. I admit I have some…questionable motives at times, but I only have one objective. To have fun. And where is more fun than on Earth? Illusions lose their charm when there is no one to look at them. And this world can become quite lonesome after some time.”

And the activities commenced, all minus the storm. They had first stumbled upon Wood Nymphs, twirling in circles, donned in silk and cashmere robes. One lounged on a branch high up, playing the golden harp. The melody echoed along with the chirp of birds. The dancing Nymphs soon rushed to them, pulling (Name) out of his grasp with giggles and sweet whispers. She looked at Kane as if to ask if it was alright to join them. He merely winked. A grin broke out on her face as she let the women spin her as she joined their strange dance. But as she glided, stumbled, and watched, trying to catch onto the next move, she kept stealing glances at him, finding him greatly amused at her expense, and his magick playing with the saplings which jittered happily.

Everything was unexplainably loud: the joyful tune, the rustling of leafs, the breaths of Nymphs and their sing-song laughter, the faraway sound of dipping water… And the heat was finally getting to her, and once she spun her foot got caught on a root and she tumbled forward, straight into his chest. He did not even budge, simply caught her with ease.

“Careful now.” He warned, regaled, his lips quirking into a devil-like smile, “How am I to take you dancing if you keep falling over?”

Shakily she apologised, not failing to notice his hands resting on the sides of her waist. But before she could even form a coherent sentence, the Nymphs had stolen her back from him once again, and this time he let her go with laughter. Blushed and flustered, she tried to avoid looking back at him, though the idea was tempting.

When they escaped the Nymphs, they trotted along, and (Name) made sure to show off her crown of flowers the women had placed on her head. They moved with no direction in mind, this forest a labyrinth of secrets. But just as she figured they had taken a wrong path to nowhere, they found a glass garden, big and mossy, yet through the glass she saw butterflies sleeping in flowerbeds. They entered and it was even hotter here, crowded. The pollen emitted peculiar scents: from strawberries, to chocolate, to something pleasant but light-headed. She coughed when she breathed it all in. Suddenly, everything was funny.

And yes, perhaps there was a small storm once they stumbled upon a body of water – oh dear, when had he lost his hat? – and perhaps she was too giddy to control her power, and the leaves which she magickally moulded into makeshift boats shattered along with half of the pond.

But the sky was still candy, still luminous. She isn’t sure if it was before or after the water incident that she realised this place is forever. Her life back at Penderghast felt like a millennia ago, dull, and grey, and full of responsibilities, but here she was free to do as she pleases. There is so much to explore that she knows even if she inspected every inch of this forest that she still would miss something. The possibilities here are endless, and summer here, too.

Before she knew she was back at the begging, at the old mirror which’s surface rippled once more. And fear abruptly struck her and she took a cautious step back, letting go if his hand that she, unknowingly, was holding.

“You don’t want to go back?” He questions, brows raised, pretending to be surprised by her reluctance. She shakes her head.

“I don’t want to leave you.” She admits before she can stop herself, and she feels so stupid for her outburst. He grins, all too pleased, yet the look in his eyes is tender. His hand lands on her cheek, his fingers rough against her sensitive skin.

“The first time I saw your face, I knew it.” She leans into his touch, “I knew there is something undeniably special about you. I am…glad you feel the same.”

“I knew it too.” She whispers, “I just…there were…People trying to convince me otherwise.”

“Do they still matter?”

“No.”

“Good. I do not enjoy sharing.”

And it is finally so painfully clear. The secret that had been heavy in her chest burst free and blooms into awe and love. Love? Fascination, adoration, one may choose which ever word one may, but there is no denying the obvious. This feeling is greater than her, greater than him, and the whole world, every accident, every smile, every painful memory was meant to lead her to this moment. Her eyes gleam with fondness and he knows exactly what she is thinking, because he is thinking it, too. All it takes is one gentle pull and his lips connect with her in a delicious, forbidden kiss that leaves her breathless.

It is over much too soon, and when they part their fingers intertwine.

“Write to me?” She asks.

“I am not sure that would be wise.”

She smirks, “Wise? Who cares about wise? Where’s the fun in wise?”

“Ah, a woman after my own heart.”

“Don’t I already have it?”

“And here I thought you had a shy disposition. I’m proven wrong. It is you who is bad for me, not vice versa.”

She takes a few steps towards the mirror, “You sure you don’t want to come with me?”

“Oh, I do. But I can’t.”

“Because of Alma?”

“And the rest of the faculty, yes.”

“Then I’ll make sure to raise a bit of chaos for you.”

He lands a kiss on her knuckles and finally lets go, watching with a pleased smile as she winks and jumps through the mirror. The world is a delirious contortion once again before all falls into the stale image of the Hall of Mirrors. The rising sun is peaking over the horizon, its rays slowly dissolving the crown on her head, which evaporates into gold and orange smoke. She is shivering from the nights events.

Yet she can’t help herself from smiling. Wide awake she wanders back to the dorms, entering the shared lounge and finding Shreya, sleepy, her hair a mess, stopping by her bedroom door to glance at her, “Morning?” Shreya says, voice hoarse from sleep.

(Name) beams, “Mornin!”

“You’re…up early?”

(Name) hums, “Yeah, I’ve been walking around campus trying to clear my head. Anyway, better catch up on some zs. See you at breakfast?”

Shreya only nods, stumbling into her bedroom and shutting the door behind her. (Name) wonders will the table be silent again. With her so…energetic, that is hardly an option. She will talk everyone’s ears off.

And no one will suspect a thing.

thank you for reading! ❤

[avversiera-writes]

‘till death do us part - chapter 6 [tobirama senju/you]

Chapter 6 - How to Steal a Crown

Summary: Tobirama tries to fix his brother’s shortcomings. 

Words: 3.3k

A/N: THE SCENE THAT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOREVER TO WRITE IS HEREEEEEEEEEEEEE... I know I am writing like crazy lmaoo but I literally cannot stop because it hurts to stop lmfaoooo so....here ya go. let me know what you think. Two more chapters left until the end!

available on AO3

<< Chapter 1 - Allegiances // Chapter 2 - Union // Chapter 3 - Love Like You // Chapter 4 - Look to the Horizon // Chapter 5 - Return 

Tobirama flips through the village’s financial ledgers, seething with a frustrating anger that he cannot calm. He references the Senju clan’s own books, and he is dismayed to find that the numbers match exactly. This is blatant evidence that money has been liquidated to the Senju accounts, and then used by Hashirama. If this comes into the wrong hands, not only will his brother be ruined, but the rest of his family and he cannot allow that to happen. What is more heartbreaking is that this has been going on for over a year now, and Tobirama was busy running around to attend to his personal life and away from his brother when he was needed by him. He pinches the bridge of his nose, and he lets out a shout of vexation and sends the scrolls and the books and other important parchments to the floor. 

 “I tried to fix it when you were gone,” Hashirama says shamefully, appearing at the door of Tobirama’s new home office. 

Barely moved in his new house, Tobirama chose to use the recluse space as his base to figure out things. His wife is in the hospital, and this house is empty and quiet and devoid of any distractions. It is also bare and undecorated, perfect for not being uncomfortable enough to not take a rest.

Tobirama balls his fists, trying to control himself from lashing out any more. “Is that why you were so eager for me to go away?!” 

 Hashirama’s eyes widened. “No, Tobirama–”

 “Be quiet, elder brother, I am trying to think,” Tobirama cuts him off and he turns around towards the window. 

Tobirama exhales and he whips around. “You have a problem,” he declares in a way that would dissuade any feelings of argument. “Even if you saved our village from Madara’s attack, you advertently cut off its legs. What were you thinking?!” Tobirama shouts. 

 Hashirama’s expression darkens and he crosses his arms. There is no simple explanation for this. 

Tobirama hits the desk, and it breaks in half, the splinters flying up as the desk goes in on itself. “You told me to be happy. To go and enjoy my time with her, while you did this behind my back? You could have told me! I could have done something to fix this!” 

 “It is not your job to fix my problems!” Hashirama bellows. 

 “I am your brother!” Tobirama’s eyes are awash with newfound anger. “You did not trust me enough to confide in me!” 

 “And what? Keep you away from your wife?” Hashirama snaps. 

“She would have understood,” Tobirama replies icily. “She would have understood! She would have let me!” 

 Hashirama steps closer, and the floor beneath his feet begins to crack and new branches of trees creep out. “You take her for granted too much!” 

“Stop changing the subject!” Tobirama screams, and he pushes back with his own chakra, cutting the sprouting forest in half before they reach the roof. 

 “It would have been fine,” Hashirama grits out. 

 “Stop making excuses!” Tobirama bellows, the floor he is standing on becomes a crater. "You should have come to me!" 

Hashirama looks away, and says nothing. The room is thick with their aura and their intense emotions that it is possible it can kill an ordinary shinobi. It is hard to breathe in the room at the moment, and if one dares to relieve their lungs with a sigh, the consequences may be catastrophic. They are walking on eggshells. 

 Tobirama kneads his forehead, unable to say anything else lest he makes matters worse. He cannot bring himself to look at his brother. All his life, he has devoted himself to make sure that Hashirama’s dreams come true because he believed them to be good and that they will change the world. There is no one else like Hashirama, there is no greater shinobi than him. He is hailed as the god of shinobi, for heaven’s sake. 

 So, why did the god of shinobi sink this low? 

 Because above all rules, they are human first, who feel too much and who make many mistakes. 

“Damn it, elder brother,” Tobirama utters solemnly. 

Tobirama takes a deep breath, and he meets his brother’s gaze. “You will attend to your duties as Hokage. Do not say a word about this. We will fix this my way .” 

//

It is late at night, and Tobirama stops short outside of his wife’s hospital room. Something about her injury makes him come to a sickening conclusion: that she has no regard for her life, and takes unnecessary risks. He cannot protect her if she keeps doing this to herself, and he will never admit it, but he needs her to be still and to remain steadfast because he cannot divide himself enough to be there for her and his brother and the village. He is not sure, along with some of his doubts, if he can do it all. He needs to know that she will be fine and he needs to make sure of it. He feels terrible, but he has made it this long. Sometimes, the most terrible things have to be done in order to make sure that the world keeps turning.

 He will never be the husband that she deserves, but what he can do best is protect her. He knows that she has promised to be there for him, but Tobirama also knows that she is not only his wife, but she is also a shinobi with her own beliefs and commitment to duty. In the end, he cannot separate himself completely from his emotions. He does not want to lose her, and that feeling makes his stomach curl in fear. He can face a thousand enemies, but nothing is as daunting as her leaving him too early in life. 

 Tobirama’s hand lingers at the knob, but he cannot make himself turn it. 

He allowed himself one moment of happiness, and he is blinded by his own needs. What kind of a shinobi is he that he forgets for one second what it is he is supposed to do? What kind of brother is he if he cannot devote himself to the village that his brother loves? 

Tobirama stalks off like a storm and he heads back to his new house. It is dark and unwelcoming, but it is what he needs right now. He is the one with solutions, so he will do his part. 

 He lights the lamps to give him light, and he arranges the living room to be his own personal office for now. The furniture that is yet to be used stand and crowd the room like vigilant statues, and Tobirama cannot stand them so he covers them with blankets. Then, he drags his things into the table there and he gets to work. 

 His mind works well when he is alone and under pressure, and it takes all night until daybreak without break to formulate and translate his ideas into something tangible. He drafts letters to be sent to the daimyos asking for a loan, treaties with other small villages with negotiations on trade, and new rules to reform the village so that it generates more income to keep it going. Of course, the shinobi in the village need to partake. 

He lists his ideas on reforming the Chuunin exams: that in the future, the other villages they are allied with should come to their village to take them in goodwill. This will, hopefully, foster peace and encourage trading of services. 

 He also remedies the system and the ranks of shinobi, where each mission has to be strictly assigned to ranks that can handle them, not just because the Hokage deems it appropriate for them.

 He even creates new jobs to be filled in so that it can create another system of checks and balances. Like a group of people to do work in the shadows, and another to keep order in their growing village.

 These will take time, but he has made elaborate steps that need to be taken so that they will work. Especially, in the long run. He cannot base everything on something as unstable as hope.

Without a blink, he works, pushing everything aside, especially his feelings. 

//

Tobirama has not slept for two days, but he feels fine . 

 He is on his brother’s back most of the time, supervising his decisions. He knows that his brother can handle himself as the Hokage, but at the moment, he does not trust anybody but himself. He especially does not trust his brother’s emotional capabilities. More than ever, he needs to be the one to guard his brother’s thoughts, now that Madara is really gone and his brother is the one who killed his friend. 

 Tobirama is not a fool. He cannot turn a blind eye to Hashirama’s fondness towards Madara anymore, and this makes him pull the leash on his brother a little closer. 

 He knows that he is the only one who can do this for his brother. 

 Another incident like that cannot happen in the future. The village cannot afford it. 

He rarely talks to his brother about personal matters these days unless it is about policies or some small issue from the clans. He just wants to avoid a fight, but sometimes, it is unavoidable and the Hokage office is thrown into chaos from their tempers. Tobirama can definitely do better to control the situation, but he also cannot help getting the last word in. Probably because he lacks sleep and everything around him makes him more cranky than normal. 

Hashirama turns his chair towards the Hokage mountain, where his carved face stands, alone and cold. Behind him, Tobirama is shuffling papers. 

 The silence is deafening, but there is nothing they could do about it. 

“This office needs more windows,” Tobirama comments off-handedly. “To get some air and light in.” 

 Hashirama nods, and he catches his brother’s reflection on the window. 

"Is that all?” Hashirama coldly asks. 

 “I’m assigning some people to follow you as your personal guards. You can go anywhere you want, but they report to me.” Tobirama leaves it at that and he hurries out, not giving his brother a chance to reply. 

//

Stepping into his estranged new home, Tobirama did not expect you to be there, and already getting the household ready to be inhabited. You are moving things around by yourself, and pausing to catch your breath. While the physicians have said that your recovery went well, they recommended that you do not partake in strenuous physical activities. 

 “You do know that we will have servants, right?” Tobirama says, and you start, almost dropping the vase you are holding. “They will come next week after I evaluate them.”

 You whirl around and you glare at your husband incredulously. “There’s my husband, who by the way, had to be there to check me out from the hospital. Oh wait, I haven’t even seen him in two days!”

Tobirama blinks, too tired to retort. There are many instances where you do not make it clear whether you’re picking fun or just plain upset at him. 

 “I had hoped my students convinced you to stay longer,” Tobirama begins in a monotone voice. 

 “Why? So you can avoid me some more?” You raise an eyebrow and set down the vase. 

Tobirama carefully watches you as you walk towards him. Your eyes search his face, noting the bags under his eyes and your expression softens. 

“You have not slept,” you comment and Tobirama is mildly surprised. He had hoped to hide it from you. 

 “I had much to do,” Tobirama concludes.

“Since when did you not have much to do?” You try to joke, but the air feels to heavy to lift. You, of all people, understand what is at stake. 

 Slowly, you slip your arms around his waist, and lean your head on his chest. Tobirama stiffens slightly–ever his daub self–but little by little, he melts into you with a sigh. 

 “How can I help?” You murmur. 

 “I don’t think you can,” Tobirama answers, his voice a soothing hum from your ear pressed against his chest. 

 “Sure, I can,” you push a little. You are determined to insert yourself in his ambitions, because it will be easier to share his life with yours. “At least let me be the one to meet the servants.” 

Tobirama is overwhelmed at your willingness to help. A part of him wants to say yes, but he also has his own resolve. 

“No, it is alright,” Tobirama rejects your offer, and he gently pushes you off. 

 “Will you at least tell me what you’re doing?” You hate to bother him, especially when he is tired, but you also hate to watch him immerse himself into his familiar madness without doing anything to help him. 

Tobirama gives you a strict look of not now , and he heads upstairs to his ruined study. 

You press a hand to your forehead to cool off, and you remind yourself that you hallucinated that version of Madara in your dreams. It was not a genjutsu, but it sticks to you like one, in a way that it grips every space of your mind when you are not occupied. 

 You bite your lower lip, and you will away your fears. 

He said that even if Tobirama does the right thing, and he will do what is expected of him, he will still fall. 

 You cannot stop Tobirama from being the person that everybody needs, and he will be, more than ever. Probably more than you feel to need him because he cannot just be nothing . Everybody dies, and you have made your peace with that, but you know that Tobirama’s death cannot be in vain. You have to be there to make sure that he will stay strong. 

 So you just have to stop loving him more than you have to so that you can let him be who he has to be. For your shared vision for Konohagakure. For the future.

 You don’t even know where to start. 

//

Thunder bellows from outside the window, and the rain splashing against your window wakes you. Lighting darts across the dark sky, and you roll to your back, and reach for Tobirama. The side of his bed is cold, and you stare at the dark ceiling, listening to any signs of life in the house. 

 You are completely alone. 

You close your eyes, but a feeling nags at you. 

You jump out of bed and wrap your yukata tightly around your body, and throw on a haori hanging by the changing corner. It is bigger on you, and you realize that it has Tobirama’s distinct sandalwood smell on it. You pause and you run your hands down on it, and then you hurry downstairs. 

 You slide the doors open, but only the rain greets you. Tobirama is nowhere to be found. 

Searching frantically for an umbrella, you ransack your own home until finally, you feel it in the dark. Like a fool, you run out into the rain, not wasting another second. 

 The streets of Konoha at this hour are empty, and the rain makes everything cold and blue. The shadows play at you, taunting and beckoning, and the most of the street lights are doused from the heavy rain. Tobirama could be anywhere, and you are out here, running around with an unused umbrella, completely soaked. Your hair splats on your face, your neck, and water seeps in your mouth everytime you call for Tobirama. 

 The rain runs down your eyes, occasionally blurring your eyesight, and the wind blows, haunting and inimical, making you shiver. Maybe it is tears hindering you from seeing properly. 

  Damn, damn, damn , you curse in your mind. “Damn it, all!” You shout, but you quickly quell your voice, lest you wake the whole damn neighborhood. 

Damn you, Madara , you continue to curse. 

You circle the compound, and finally you find Tobirama’s lone figure walking ahead of you. His shoulders are slumped, a contrast to his usual upright demeanor. He looks defeated, and the darkness of the night covers him like a cape. The sight breaks your heart, and all thoughts of barring your love go down the drain. Maybe you are being selfish, but he is your husband. You promised more than to be his wife. You are his companion in life. He is not just his brother’s keeper, or his students’ teacher. He is not just a future leader. 

You catch up to him, and you curse again, only now noticing that you are bare-feet as your feet slaps against the ground and splashes against the water, and really, it is so idiotic and worthy of getting teased by your husband, but you really did not care at this moment. Your instincts tell you to go to him, and to cover him, even for a few seconds. 

 You open the umbrella on his head, and the rain stops falling on him. You tremble from the cold, and from the pouring rain, but for a moment, he is safe, and this is something you can do for him. You can shield him like this. 

Tobirama halts, and he straightens his head, realizing that no rain is falling on him. He looks up to see an umbrella on his head, and his heart sighs like a strung, mellow chord. He does not cry, but the rain makes up for it. The torrent releases his burdens and rolls off of his shoulders, and when he has carried enough, you are there. All his life, he is always the one looking out for everyone. He gives his service to anyone who will need it, but no one has ever covered him from the rain. No one has taken care of his heart like you have done. 

 No one has taken the time to search for him and trudge through unfavorable paths to get to him. He expects to be the one to fight like that, but he forgets that you are also strong in your own right, and you have such grace that he cannot comprehend. All his life, no one has been this gentle and loving towards him, no questions asked. He knows that you deserve better. 

 And yet, here you are. 

Tobirama turns, and his eyes widen a fraction at the sight of you. You look like a ghost, and he almost laughs because your hair is splayed down like a wet cat, and you are wearing his dark blue overcoat. 

 He expects to find you fuming in vexation, but your gaze is tender and it is hard to meet them. 

Tobirama marvels at you, but then he remembers that it is raining, so he takes you by the arm and pulls you closer and under the umbrella that you held over his head. 

“It is late,” Tobirama states. His eyes flit down to your face, where a few raindrops flow down your cheek.

 “Thank you for informing me, I forgot where our clocks were,” you reply, feeling your teeth chatter a little. 

Tobirama’s eyes go over your forehead, and then he hears your teeth chatter. 

“Let us go home,” Tobirama finally pronounces. His heart feels lighter, now that you are here, but there the current problems do not go away that easily. “I have something to tell you.” 

You note the seriousness in his last sentence, but you can tell that Tobirama is radiating warmth, and you press your shoulder a little closer to his vicinity. You glance at his side profile and note the minuscule smile on his lips, and when he notices you staring, he gives you a questioning look. 

 You let out a little laugh, content to walk beside his footsteps. You cast your worries away, and whatever may come, you two will have each other, despite the difficulties. 

  ‘Till death do us part , you vow, once again.

 To be continued...

Chapter 7 - Make Him King >>

[aintnouseofpretending]

Many Years Away

Mr D (John Deacon) x Tomboy!Reader x Mr M (Brian May) Time Travelling reader AU imagine

You're a college student in 1973, that also works as a session musician—guitar and bass—and a part-time music instruments store clerk. One day you and one of your friend—also a session musician, are ringed to come, just in case needed,

At the end of the taping, you're asked to stay by one of the producers and watch over the small band that's going to tape last, the band is named Queen. Because it's only been recently they start to record regularly in the studio, you've never met them, and you used this opportunity to finally see them,

They absolutely amaze you, a brilliant performance you've never seen or heard before. And hell, you've never been more eager to introduce yourself to the future big guitarist and bassist of the group, learn a thing or two of their techniques,

Both Brian May and John Deacon still astounded you with their plays as you go home. You wish to catch them again soon because you didn't make the good first impression—Taylor thought you were a guy from your gestures and "uniquely progressive” fashion choice, as he said it, insults you whilst he’s at it. And lady luck stays for the night; the studio ring you the second time, you actually got to play both guitar and bass—showing off your dynamic and fluid skill, and at the same time when Queen is already there,

Nothing beats the feeling of getting your skills recognised by fellow guitarists; quickly you, May, and Deacon become friends. Ever since then, you might not get called, but you always come to the studio just to see Queen recording and learn more from May and Deacon,

Also because you took a deeper interest in the men themselves,

You're getting closer and closer to both of them to the point that you're expected backstage on their every plays—gigs, but you purposely use an incorrect term to piss off Taylor,

One day, though, you can't come to the next one because you've got to do your thesis—much to their shame. So Taylor jokes; "Listen to our cassettes if you miss us, love." Despite receiving a couple smacks from your guitarist best friends, in the end, they agreed, whilst they listen to your demos,

Though there's a slight issue; you can't listen to the cassette of their debut album without feeling slight headaches, every damn time, as if you're not supposed to do it. At first, when you bought it, you think you're just a bit stressed or under the weather, so you force yourself and listen to the cassette till its finishes, but it always happens; and the headache become increasingly painful the more you try to listen and go through the album,

Of course, you never told them about it, because of; 1, you listen to them live when they're taping each song, listen to them rehearsing, and you always feel normal. 2, you'd rather endure the spinning effect than telling them the truth that you might pass out listening to it. Eventually, you are angered by the mysterious symptoms, you chose to keep forcing yourself and listen to their album before they're back,

And you actually passed out. It frustrates you to lie to May and Deacon about that; so you listen to them very seriously when they rehearsing after they came back. And of course, nothing happens to you, despite the fact that they played the songs that are in the cassette,

When you're about to completely accepted that maybe you have a rare case of not being able to listen to any processed sounds ever again, something strange happens; both May and Deacon suddenly looks very old for a split second,

And that didn't stop; the more you spend time with them, stranger things keep on coming. It's no longer just May and Deacon, all of them will change into the old version of themselves, but there's one more bizarre thing that earns the crown of the odds and curious,

You feel like you didn't belong there. As if all this time you're put in that world by accident, but you fit in for some reason, whatever happens to you refuse to tone down. You hallucinate something of neon and colourful but dark and grey world, sky-high buildings, technologies you've never seen but more familiar as if you've known it since birth,

You try to hide it, despite almost getting yourself fired, and worst; dropped out when you're about to graduate. It’s also not helping that whenever you see May and Deacon, they keep on growing older. You're absolutely sure you have Schizophrenia—but you don't think it's known wide by the public yet. Wait, how would you know?

Your unusual demeanour eventually brings May and Deacon knocking on your door. Of course, in the end, you can’t lie, especially to May that catches you doing it in the speed of light, and there’s no other way but be honest,

After telling them, you aren't even surprised that the episodes' become milder so abruptly. You took the opportunity to analyse it, find out what's wrong. Nonetheless, you're glad everything is back to normal... Except it didn't, the imagery is back and even more vivid than before,

You're thankful May and Deacon is there to aid you. Finally, in one of your episode, it’s like the last puzzle piece was finally put in your mind, you remembered; you were from 2039. "2039? What are you talking about, y/n?" May asked.

"I-I think that's the year... Where I came from..." You answered, "all the hallucinations make sense... I... Might've been dreaming all this."

"Or it's simply one of your absurd images. That means nothing, y/n. You're here. You're real. You're not a time traveller."

"What if I am? And I have to go back?"

"Otherwise the rest of my life will be agonizing."

If you were any more out of your mind, you might miss that. But neither of you chose to mention it further, seeing you so out of your zone. May soon escorted you home safely. Just like before, when you tell him or Deacon about it, the visions become blurry before it gets even crystal clear,

But you knew all along, you're not from there, and when the gears' start working, your clock is ticking, and the images from where you came from has stopped completely. You don’t feel right being there at all, you can see the dream is about to end, and it’s inevitable,

You enjoy the rest of your stay, never have you stopped saying you're grateful to meet them, to hang with them, to be best friend with May and Deacon. On your last day, you make excuse to throw a goodbye party till morning—that you're actually going somewhere for a bit to meet your relatives after graduating. Spoiling each member of the group,

You didn't expect for May to come back after the party ends, and he saw you deteriorating into neon lights as the sun is rising. He tried to stop it from happening, but it is the end. You tell him; "Dream or not, please be happy and live your life. Remember me. I'll miss you, May."

You're back to 2039; a college student that works in a guitar store and a session musician. You saw the Cassette you bought yesterday and listen to with your grandma's old radio; Queen's debut album. It might've been a dream, you've discovered the legendary rock band Queen because of your grandma, and had been listening to them nonstop since then; maybe that's why you dream you're a time traveller after listening to '39, Brian May is your guitar hero after all,

Not to mention you're going to be one of the session musicians to receive the honour of working with him next week. "Big fan, sir." You say after you're introduced by the producer. He asks to see you perform before the others come, and you’ve never been this nervous in your entire life, even more so because of that damned dream,

"Perfect. Sounds just like yesterday..."

"Thank you, sir. You're a very big influence on my entire career."

"Just call me, May. We're going to work together again anyway."

You pretend to ignore the last bit and says; "I'm sorry, I'm afraid I respect you too much to just call you like an old friend, sir."

"But we are."

"Whatever do you mean—?"

"Were you not to told me you're from 2039, how would I be here? Specifically picking you? Let alone wrote '39? You even play, dress, and worked as a session musician, exactly like that day. It's already impossible to forget, now it feels like we're still in that awful studio, taping, the way you cannot seems to stop calling it. Annoyed Rog so much he throws his sticks at you. How many times was it?"

"... May?"

"You've missed many of our plays. John misses you, y/n. And so am I. Much more than you can imagine."

End?

+ ———— - ———— + ———— - ———— + ———— - ———— + ———— -

There’s a high percentage that I will write this since I’m a sucker for a love triangle and slow-burn romance, and because I have lots of fun coming up with this Imagine!

By the way, feel free to request imagines, especially that involves Tomboy Reader, but of course it doesn’t close to just that particular genre, I also open for another spectrum of readers as well! Don’t be shy to be specific! I will fulfil it since I really need something fun to do amidst studying for upcoming exam @_@

[vintagegoddess12]

Hey, so can you do a cordelia x fam!reader request with 16 and 28? The reader is a new witch and in love with C but C cant get over her ex husband's betrayal even if she has feelings for R. Make it a happy ending please😍💞 thank you babe xxx

Here it is Cordelia x fem!Reader with 

16. Kiss me, you coward

and

28. I just wish you’d smile.

Hope you like it honey. 

---

Reader's POV

It was examination day at Ms. Robichaux's Academy for Exceptional Young Women. Today's test, Mind Reading Resistance. Our instructor, the Hollywood actress Bubbles Mcgee with the power of soul reading, has been training us to build a mental wall to keep out unwanted intruders from reading our minds. Building a wall is a piece of cake but building it to withstand the power of our Supreme is another thing, specially if the thoughts I'm trying to block are about her. She is a powerful being, no doubt. But she also has a shattered heart. Caused by the loss of her greatest witches, her mother, her maternal figure and the betrayal of her husband. HankThat sick son of a witch hunter. I cannot even begin to fathom how anyone can betray a soul as pure as her. Well maybe not so pure, she did try to kill her mother, but that's beyond the point. If I was given the chance to be with her, I would do anything just to make her happy and keep her smiling. I will worship her and assure that I am hers, body and soul. And that kind of thoughts is what I'm afraid she'll see. I have been anxious since last night, evidenced by my lack of sleep and not so attractive eye bags. "Do you think we'll pass this test?" The youngest in my class asked me. "Of course you will," I replied, trying to cheer her up. "I'm just hoping I can last one conversation without her knowing or reading anything.""Oh yes, you've got a crush on her," she exclaimed. Everyone knows my attraction towards the most powerful witch on earth, thanks to Bubbles reading my thoughts aloud one time in class. "Y/n, you're next." Speaking of the soul reading bitch. "Fake it 'till you make it, darling." She encouraged me. "And would you please stop calling me a bitch," she added. My brain is vulnerable today. One thing's for sure,I am so failing this test. 

---

Cordelia's POV

You slowly entered my office. Your body language shows you're afraid of something or someone. I hope it's not me. The minute you stepped foot in the manor, you did nothing but light up everyone's life, myself included. You would always bring me tea or food when you feel like I haven't eaten anything. You would visit me in my office in your free time and ask if there's anything you can help me with. You're very thoughtful. Sweet. Caring. You make me almost forget the bad things that has happened in my life these past few years. You were such a good friend and maybe, just maybe--"Ms. Cordelia," you said, breaking my train of thought. "Y/n, how are you feeling?" You sat down across from me. "Sleepy. Very sleepy," you replied, your honesty making me laugh a little. I bit my lower lip to stop from giggling even more. I then noticed you swallowed while staring at my lips- the sight of which stirred something inside me."How long does this usually last?" You asked, breaking the silence. "If you can hold your fort for atleast 5 minutes, you're free to go." I informed you. You seem irritated by what's happening. "Are you fine, y/n?""I just don't like people getting in to my head,"   irritability evident in your face. "I just don't like sharing my thoughts.""Not even to me?" A feeling of sadness and stupidity washed over me. I thought you consider me as a trusted friend. Maybe that was just me. Most specially youI heard your voice in my head. It's not like I was trying to read you. Your mind is just so loud, I guess. "Why don't you want me to know?" I asked only to regret it later. Your face went from irritated to shocked then scared in a split second. Curiosity got the better of me. This time I didn't wait for your reply. I tapped in to your head and it was very anxious. I searched through every possible reason why you're acting this way today. I just wish you'd smileI just wish you'd smileI just wish you'd smile"Why do you want to see me smile?" Before I finished asking, you stood up and headed for the door. I followed you and prevented you from touching the door knob, your back facing me. I asked you again, "Why do you want to see me smile?" You faced me, your breath in a quicker pace, and looked up at me. "I...I..I," you stuttered, our close distance not helping you at all. You took one big breath and started talking. "I hate that once upon a time, a stupid guy hurt you and betrayed you. And because of that, no matter how much you smile and laugh in front of us, pain is still evident in your eyes." You stopped for a split second, trying to determine what my reaction is - which is shocked. You continued, "I want to see you smile, the kind of smile where pain isn't present. The kind of smile that brings warmth to the hearts of other. Most importantly, I want to be the reason you smile like that.""You me..me...an?" It was my turn to stutter. "I mean, I like you Ms. Cordelia," you said with confidence, using your new found courage. "The moment I joined the coven, all I ever wanted is to make sure you're happy and loved. Even though I know that you're still hruting because of what that good for nothing guy did to you." By the time you finished your declaration, your cheeks were red already - I'm guessing mine are as well.You bit your lip then stared at mine. You returned your attention to my eyes, looking intently. I didn't know what to say. My ex-husband might have hurt me but you helped a lot in easing the pain. There are some nights where I'd dream of your smile and not the flashes of him cheating on me. I thought it was just the world playing games on me because a student wouldn't fall for her headmistress. Yet here you are, admitting openly that you do like me. A smile spread across my face, "I think I like you too, y/n." Somehow the world seemed to stop for a moment, for us. "Well what are you waiting for, kiss me, you coward." I teased you. You look shocked. "Why am I the coward? I was the one who had feelings first!" You exclaimed. "And you were the one who ran away from it," I replied. "Whatever," then you closed the distance between us. Your lips planted on mine and you pulled me closer, our mouths in perfect synchrony. It tasted sweet and there were electricity running through my veings. I pulled away to catch my breath. "You do realize, you failed your exams," I reminded you. You opened your eyes and looked at me, "but I did win you over, right?" I smiled then kissed you and this time, with great intensity. I pushed you closer to the door and had my hands roaming around you. I bit your lower lip and you let out a moan. I continued finding spots that would make you either moan or cry out my name, regardless whether the witches at the other side of the door wonder what's taking us so long. Sooner or later Bubbles asked if we were done. I replied, "she haven't finished yet."Pun. Intended.

The End.

[libretyreads-blog]

Book recommendation and a Rant, Your Welcome.

Hello! And Welcome to Librety Reads! My name is Megan and today I am going to bestow upon whoever reads this a recommendation for an amazing book series and a free complimentary rant. No need to thank me, please don't worry about it. So first I will begin with the book recommendation: 'The Cruel Prince' by Holly Black. This book is amazing and I really, really liked it. I will not spoil anything (because that would suck) but I highly recommend this series and suggest that you read it in time for the third book's release (hopefully next year). I am looking forward to 'The Queen of Nothing' and even just the title makes me excited and slightly depressed because ,unfortunately, I still have not gotten over the ending to 'The Wicked King'. Thank you Holly Black for giving me a reason to keep slogging on till next year. I must find out what happens next in this amazing series. And now for what you have all been waiting for. I started this at 21:00 (9 pm), and will finish at sometime around maybe 21:30? So to begin, it is mock season in school (these mocks being my final round until my real exams in the summer) which is tragic to think about. But also kind of exciting? I cannot wait to get my exams over with so I can leave my school. It is not a bad school by any means; the teachers are good (better than good actually they are amazing) ; the subjects are not that boring if I'm completely honest (besides Spanish ( ͡° ʖ̯ ͡°)) ; and hey, school food is actually pretty decent (except the pizza. That stuff is honestly inedible. It is really not good). The thing that makes me excited to leave school is the people in it. They are honestly either absolutely inconsiderate, rude and just plain moronic and simple-minded or they are incredibly terrifying and should not be allowed on a school premises. But hey, that's besides the point. It's mock season. I have a biology mock tomorrow and I can already feel that I am not going to do well in it. It is my own fault though so I guess I will have to get over it. There is just too much to revise! And this time in my life is extremely stressful. I'm sure that everyone in my position is extremely tired by this point of the year. At least once I finish these mocks I will have two weeks off from school so I can read to my heart's content, eat, and hopefully catch up on all of the revision I did not have time to do for these mocks and secure my knowledge for the real exams. Also, I can hopefully focus upon preparing for the mock that concerns me the most - English Literature. :) Another depressing fact, my real Spanish speaking mock will take place a few weeks after those Easter holidays (which is, you know, fun). I believe the correct phrase for this situation is 'painful'. I will not utilize the phrase 'I would like to die' however as I feel like because that phrase is said so often it has sort of lost its meaning and value. So much so that what once may have been considered a concerning comment simply earns the speaker a tedious eye-roll from over-hearing patrons. And I suppose it's justified. Since people seem to think that these sorts of thoughts are the norm and depression is something that deserves to be over looked because it's over used. I feel like some people think that it's 'trendy' to be depressed?? And almost fashionable I guess? Which is not okay because the harsh reality is that it is not trendy whatsoever. Because people with depression are only now getting the help that they have so rightly deserved and been deprived of for years. Some people are just disgusting and like to pretend in order to gain some shred of attention from people who they will see for about 5 years of their early pre-adult life and once they leave school they will never see them again. I do not know if I am making sense? (hey it's 9pm, I know it might not seem late but forgive me. I'm old. I'm tired. And! I'm stressed. :) ) But hey, it's helpful to pour out your thoughts every once in a while (even though this rant has taken a slight turn  (ᴗ ͜ʖ ᴗ)). So, Back to my point. Ahem. Where was I? Ah yes! My unfathomable hate for Spanish. Now, do not misunderstand. I love the country of Spain, it is one of my favorite places and was one of the reasons I chose to study Spanish in the first place. But the subject, is so boring? We don't even learn about the culture of Spain or about its people, we literally learn how to say different foods and what different movies we have seen on TV. It's ridiculous and I really don't enjoy it. ¡Y me aburro como una ostra! I enjoy learning the language itself, but my teacher is so passive aggressive it's unbelievable. I really don't like the speaking exam either. I just don't really like talking to people I guess? And I'm not that great with confidence? So that really sways my opinion as well. I suppose I shouldn't hate on it for something that is my problem, however, I just don't like the subject outside of speaking anyway. So hey, thanks for listening (well reading) if you made it this far. :) This was fun. 22:20 (10:20pm) oops.