#cassiel belanger

[painful-pooch]

The Belanger Masterlist

The Making of Beasts and Atrocities

In a world where animal shifters are beginning to be seen as second class citizens and ostracized for being different, street musician Cassiel Ohazia Belanger finds out in the worst way possible what happens when one is discovered to be a shifter. What hardships will the loving dire wolf shifter face and will he be able to change how the wold views those with an animal inside of them? Can Cassiel be able to fight the Beast that he holds within him without destroying everything he has ever loved and cared about? Will the world change for the better or will there be a war waged between humans and shifters? What truly makes a beast and what turns those to monsters.

CWs for the series (each post will be individually tagged): pet whump, slavery, inequality of race, long term captivity, dehumanization, team whump, death, fighting rings, forced drugging, and a lot of brutality from those in charge of the system, possible bbu adjacent themes

~~~

The Beginning/Training:

A Musician's Morning Routine

A Chilling Reality for the Musician

The Ring of Fangs and Blood:

Beasts Can't Love Anyone

Branding of the Beast

A Road to the Meadows

Colors of Symphony

~~~

Other Writings, Asks, and Extra Information!

This is where I am dumping writings where it’s either an AU or an ask. Some of the asks are actually writings and part of the story and will have already been sorted out above. This is mostly for extra information and what not that you would like to know.

~~~

AUs:

Cas and the Lamb (BBU Collab with @ocean-blue-whump)

Across the Stars and Through the Meadows (BBU Collab with @ocean-blue-whump)

Reference Pictures:

Character Sheet and Art

Asks:

Cas and Strangers // Cas and Verna // Cas and Arthur //

Cas and Tom and Runa // Insulting Cas (prompt) // Are you Smart //

Taking Advantage // Cas Meadows // Scream in the Bar (Prompt) //

Worst Thing to Ever Happen // A Secret Kept // Color of Screams //

What Are You Thankful For? (Prompt) // Cas Tells the Truth

[inscrutable-shadow]

Mediwhump May Day 8 - Scared of Blood

@mediwhumpmay

Cassiel belongs to @painful-pooch! Based on the fact that I broke my wrist in fifth grade, treated it as a sprain even though it def wasn't (no fracture on the x-ray so guessing it was a hairline) and then developed a ganglion cyst ten years later lol my wrist is still fucked up it's so fun (i went over my self-imposed word count on this one ack) Content Warnings: needles, minor surgical procedure

Another transfer case. The Doctor was considering making it look like they’d retired to avoid these. At this point, it was usually minor outpatient procedures that were incredibly annoying to perform and even though they could charge the insurance their usual “nameless doctor” rate (which was still less than other doctors would have), having to deal with legal processes at all made them want to spend an afternoon performing unsavoury experiments on a corpse. Not that they didn’t always want to do that. 

Between that and the fact that the espresso machine had broken down and they’d been forced to fuel their morning on drive-through coffee, they were already in quite a bad mood when their patient arrived, all shyness and deference and looking out of place, and they couldn’t bring themselves to demur back. 

“Mr Belanger, I presume? Do come in. I do not have all day to waste. The outreach programme has sent you over, no? I do wish that they would not send their excess to me…” “Oh, I can just… I dinnae have to…” Cassiel was slightly shorter than the Doctor, and despite his broad shoulders appeared to shrink back into the doorframe. They identified his accent as Scottish, though pulled at and smoothed over around the edges by proximity to other regions like the Doctor’s own mostly-English, sometimes-Swedish intonation.

They sighed. “My apologies. That was unprofessional of me. Just an annual physical, yes? Please, have a seat. I shall have you in and out in no time.” 

He hesitantly took his seat on the examination table while the Doctor pulled on a fresh pair of gloves. “It’s… you dinnae need money frae me, right?” Yes. He did not appear to be the sort of person who could afford them: his clothes were in tatters and his shoes full of holes. They were used to a clientele with large amounts of ill-gotten gains. 

They raised an eyebrow. “Correct, my compensation is covered by an agreement with the clinic you came from. Verify your name, date of birth, and medical history on that tablet over there, will you?” They rolled over the cart with the medical supplies on it while he did so, frowning and exchanging one tool for another just to kill the time. “Any particular complaints?”

Cassiel watched them warily as they brought their gloved hands up to check his lymph nodes. “Nay, nothin’ I can think of…”

Liar. “Oh? And does it hurt when I do this?” They bent his right wrist forward at a completely reasonable angle, which made him flinch and a spark of vindicated mischief flare in the Doctor’s chest. “That is what I expected. How long have you had the ganglion cyst?”

Cassiel blinked. “The what?”

“Ganglion cyst. A pocket of fluid found on the top or bottom of the wrist. Cause unknown, though they are common for patients who perform repeated wrist motions or have a history of wrist trauma.” They held up the hand, running a gloved finger down the scars on his arm. “You engage in some form of martial arts, no? I assume you fractured your wrist at some point in the past, perhaps a hairline, and you treated it as a sprain. This is quite a lot of fluid, I am sure it hinders your daily activities. How long have you had it?”

“Oh, er… Couple o’ years, I think… Is it dangerous? It does bother me a bit…”

“Not dangerous, no, but if it is impeding your activities, I do recommend aspiration, especially if it is multiple years old and has not gone down. It is a minor outpatient procedure, I could have the whole thing done for you before you leave today.” They rolled over to the supply cabinet to begin withdrawing the materials even before receiving an answer.

The colour had drained out of the man’s face by the time they turned around again. “H-hold on, wait… what’s… aspiration?”

The Doctor was too busy comparing needle gauges and deciding which one would be appropriate to really pay this any mind. “Quite simple, needle goes in, fluid comes out. Local anaesthetic is all that will be necessary. Just take care with the hand in question for a couple of days.”

“It… doesnae have to be a needle, do it? I, er…” Oh. Needle phobia. How annoying.

They tilted their head at him. “Well, I could excise instead. A bit more involved, I would need to use the scalpel, but should still have you in and out in an hour or so.”

He seemed to like that idea even less. “No, ah, it’s… all right, ye can, aspirate or wha’ever it is…”  

“Very good.” They began preparing the implements. “To reduce anxiety during the procedure, you can feel free to talk about whatever you would like. Keep your eyes on the chart on the back wall, yes?” 

The patient was silent for a moment as the Doctor began swabbing the site for the lidocaine injection, but eventually, he took a breath and blurted out, “I thought yer voice didnae match ye, when I walked in.”

“What?” The word came out strangely, as if their voice didn’t know how to behave when attention was called to it.

“Ye didnae seem like a purple person. I can… I see sounds.”

“Ah. Chromesthesia. Continue.”

Cassiel swallowed hard. “Is that… blood?” They tracked his eyes to the barrel of the syringe, which was now drawing up fluid.

“No. I told you to keep your eyes on the wall, did I not? If you stress yourself into syncope, I will not be pleased.”

He shifted uncomfortably, but relaxed after moving his attention. “See? That’s it. I thought ye’d be redder, but yer purple is very blue.” They didn’t really know how to respond to that. “Chromesthesia rarely has any tangible logic behind it, though I have been described as ‘cold’ and ‘rigid’ repeatedly by others in the past. I prefer to think of myself as efficient. There we are, all done. Not so bad, was it?” They’d done the steroid injection without him even noticing, and all that was needed now was the splint.

“That was… fast.”

“Like I said, I am efficient. Now, let us continue with the examination, yes?”

[ocean-blue-whump]

Gingerbread Christmas

Cassiel Belanger belongs to @painful-pooch. Merry Christmas, bb. I love you so much <3

Across the Stars and Through the Meadow Masterlist (Cas and Star AU)

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: BBU whumpees, Christmas fluff, chronically ill whumpee, whumpees in love

***

Star wipes her forehead, knowing full well she just smeared frosting all over her face, but now she matches the carnage in the rest of the kitchen. There’s bowls of frosting and cookie batter everywhere, candy scattered around the counter. She wipes her hands off on a towel and leans on her cane, admiring her handiwork. 

Her disease has just progressed more and more since they moved to the cabin, and the perfect gingerbread house she dreamt up is…less than perfect. But in her opinion, the gingerbread replica of their cabin is close enough. All that’s left to do is take the two gingerbread people and stick them on the porch. Star softly picks up gingerbread Cas, complete with a small candy guitar, and positions him next to the chair she built. Then, she takes the gingerbread version of herself, snapping her legs off to put her in the chair, and draping a fondant blanket over her “legs.” She’s been spending a lot more time sitting down lately, switching between her rocking chair and her wheelchair, but that’s the price she pays for fighting as hard as she can. 

There. Star steps back, looking at the replica. She tried to get it accurate and make it all edible, even making extra gingerbread so she could cut the burnt pieces off. She slides the gingerbread cabin to the center and moves all her mess to the side, finally picking up the powdered sugar to dust the cabin in snow. They’ve really made this place their home, and Star is grateful every day that they escaped. She never would have been happy with an owner, trapped in a house and forced to serve someone she had no affection for. But Cas...she loves him more than she can breathe, sees him as more than just a barcode or the mutt WRU wanted him to be. 

“Me love?”

Star looks up to see Cas walking down the stairs, rubbing his eyes. “Morning, baby. Merry Christmas.”

“What are ye doin’ up, lass? I thought ye were supposed’t be in bed restin’.”

She shrugs and sets the powder sugar down, watching Cas descend the stairs while carefully avoiding the lift he installed for her. “I woke up early and wanted to make this.” 

He reaches the bottom and walks over to the counter, his eyes so bright and cheerful. “What did ye make…” His eyes latch onto the gingerbread cabin, and all at once, his expression changes and he looks on the verge of tears. “Oh, lassie.”

Star looks away, feeling warmth flood her face. “I…I know it’s not great. My hands aren’t what they used to be, and I can’t do all the details. I can’t do a lot of things that I used to. I know this wasn’t what we were expecting. I know when we met, neither one of us could have imagined that I’d get sick, Cas. And I know I’m supposed to say it’s a nightmare, but you are my wonderful, amazing, handsome husband, and I wouldn’t give up what we have for anything. I’d go through hell for you. Pain…pain is nothing to me because I have the world’s best husband.” She smiles down at the gingerbread cabin. “This is the best gift you could have given me. Our happy ending. Plus…it’s edible. Maybe.”

When her husband stays speechless, she reaches out with her sugar-coated fingers and grabs his hand, still leaning on her cane. “Thank you for being my happiness, Cassiel Belanger. Thank you for the best gift ever–being your wife.”

Cas pulls her in close and she can feel his tears in her hair. “Me love. Ye being around still…ye fightin’ for me…that’s me best gift. Ye will always be the love of me life.”

She looks up at him, resting her head on his chest. “I think we’re both the lucky ones.”

He chuckles and wipes a small piece of frosting from her eyebrow. “Yer so gorgeous, Star. Even with frosting on yer pretty face.”

“Hey!” she says with a smirk and reaches over to get frosting out of a bowl, dotting it on his nose. “There. Gotcha, baby.”

He’s laughing so hard as he tries and fails to lick it off. “Lassie! What was that for?”

She uses her cane to push herself up and kiss his cheek, her heart fluttering. “I love you, Cas.”

He holds her chin and kisses her slowly, full of so much passion that she can feel the love in the air. When he finally pulls back, Star loses herself in his beautiful eyes. “I love ye more, Star. Merry Christmas.”

She leans over and breaks off a piece of the roof, putting it in his mouth. “Merry Christmas, love.”

[shapeshiftersandfire]

actual footage of my verna and @painful-pooch​‘s cas

or, alternatively, bc cas is large and friend-shaped and verna is small and gremlin-y

[painful-pooch]

Stabmas Celebration - Cas

Thank you to those in the Slices of Whump server celebrating Stabmas (The Ides of March) with me! I have 2 more fics for later, but have a Cassiel write!

CW: Homeless Whumpee, STABBBBBBBB, Sad Stuff, Fantastic Racism Mention, Knife Violence, a Hint of Gore, and Shape-Shifter Whumpee

Tagging the Squad: @emcscared-whumps, @noirineverysense, @ocean-blue-whump, @inscrutable-shadow, @actress4him, @crash-bump-bring-the-whump, @pigeonwhumps, @technom0ose, and @shapeshiftersandfire!!

Enjoy <3

It was like any normal day for Cassiel, the city life bustling around him, from the construction sites in the distance to the rumbling of cars in a constant state of traffic and seeing a never ending surge of pedestrians trying to make it to work. The combination of all the sounds gave way to a splash of multiple colors that had no real harmony, but he could see why it was something to behold; it was a symbol of a well-oiled machine, each person controlling only one part of a far grander system.

Only problem for him was that he didn’t know where he belonged in it all. He knew how to play a guitar to earn money for scraps, but beyond that, there wasn’t anything he could add to the city.

He watched on as the day turned to night and people returned to their homes while he remained outside in the cold like any average day. He set his guitar back in the case that Liam, the music shop owner, had given him, smiling as he saw that he made enough money to afford some pancakes and maybe a nice bit of protein at a local diner.

Nighttime was a little tense for him, considering he would always have to watch out for any of the Specialized Enforcement patrols that took place in the shadows, hunting for shifters. It wasn’t easy hiding from them, but he’s somehow made it through unscathed, especially considering he was a Dire Wolf shifter, and they were extinct for a long time. Or so they had thought until Cassiel was arrested.

Even though he was alone, he would sometimes lend the Beast an ear, hoping that one day, the monster that lived inside of him would no longer shed blood. Someone had to hope for the sake of the Beast.

He finally made it to the right district of the town where the diner would be, smiling to himself as he headed down the sidewalk. That was until he heard the faint sounds of a person in pain, which made him stop in his tracks, tilting his head and looking down the dimly lit street of abandoned tenements. “Oi, is anyone down there?” He called out, warily approaching one of the boarded-up doors.

“In here, man! I think I busted up my leg,” a man responded, the voice showing up as a bright teal color. Cas looked around and then at the board, wondering if it’s a trap.

Of course it’s a trap, you fucking moron, but what would I know? It’s not like I feed off of this sort of thing. Go on ahead and play ‘hero’. I am sure they are going to give you loads of hugs for it.

That’s all Cas needed to bust down the board, leaving his guitar inside of the derelict building, his eyes still adjusting to the dark. “Where are ye, lad?” He asked, taking small, calculated steps down the hallway, walking past a few doors.

“Right here.”

Cas didn’t have a chance to react, a sharp pain in his side forcing him to pull away and press his back to the wall. His eyes caught the sight of three men, one of them placing an arm across Cas’ neck and another sharp pain in the center of his stomach, his cries cut off.

“No need to be scared, buddy. We just want to take your stuff and leave. Don’t make this harder than it has to be. Where’s your wallet?” His voice, still a bright teal, reeked of cigarettes and alcohol. His other hand was out of sight, but Cas knew it was most likely related to the pain in his stomach.

Wonderful. Just wonderful, boy. You’ve been stabbed. You won’t even defend yourself if you had the chance. Let me take over.

He couldn’t let the Beast win, but he felt himself getting dizzy from the agony of his injuries, tears in his eyes. The man in front of him growled and mumbled something Cas didn’t quite catch, but a powerful force made him fall to the floor with a thud, his head cracking against the wooden floor.

“Where’s your fucking wallet, low-life?!” A new voice screamed at him, placing a boot over where the initial pain was. This voice was a dim orange, but he couldn’t focus too much on it, his eyes were stuck on the blade sticking out of his stomach, which the woman casually ripped out, making Cas cry out in response.

“I d-don’t have one, lad. I swear. Me only p-possession is me guitar,” he responded, holding the woman’ ankle in a faint attempt to make the weight on his injury less. “I’m not l-lyin!” His lips trembled in fear and he saw the man who originally called for him and another man, far older than the first, conversing with each other. The older man brandished a dagger. Not any dagger, but the one that the Specialized Enforcement agents were selling to civilians to ward off shifters.

“No money means we can’t let you live, little guy,” the older man gruffly chuckled with a splash of daffodil yellow, taking a few steps towards Cas. “Any last words?”

Let go. Give in to me, and you’ll make it out. You won’t even remember a thing.

Cas started to tear up and he shut his eyes tightly, mumbling to himself and gritting his teeth when the woman dug her heels into his stab wound. “P-please don’t do dis… I don’t want it to hurt ye all.” He opened his eyes to see red beginning to take over the edge of his vision.

The older man held the blade right at Cas’ neck.

This is your final warning. GIVE IN NOW!

“I’m sorry…”

Before the red completely took over his vision, he saw the fear in the older man’s eye when Cas’ wolf jaw clamped over his arm with an audible snap.

…

Cassiel opened his eyes, glancing around for a moment to make out where he’s at. He was under a bridge in the city park, and he winced when he moved, seeing his shirt and his pants covered in blood, as well as his hands. “Is… is dis m-“

Part of it. It got messy towards the end because you were stabbed in the side and abdomen. Luckily I helped make sure you healed fast enough. Those three people won’t be a problem anymore though.

Tears blurred his vision again and he covered his face with his blood ridden hands, apologizing to yet another three souls who encountered the Beast.

[painful-pooch]

🗝️ for Cassiel

- Ruth

I am finally able to answer your ask, @pigeonwhumps! Please fogive me for the long wait. After getting out of surgery, I have a chance to work on all the asks that have been in my inbox for a while haha.

Cassiel Master List

~~~

Cassiel holds the key you hand him and he runs his fingers across the cool, galvanized metal. “De truth, aye?” He asks you, his amber eyes making contact with yours. The second you nod your head, his eyes brighten and he set the key to the side on his guitar case. He taps at his cheek, humming while he wonders what would be worth more to tell you, and when the right idea pops into his head, he snaps his fingers and grins.

“I got one. So de truth about me is that even though I know me mum isn’t here anymore, I always play for her. Any moment I play on de streets, parks, or even in de alleys, I always imagine me mum sittin’ beside me and clappin’ her hands.” He smiles fondly and picks up his guitar, his calloused fingers strumming at each of the strings. “I have always played for me mum, and I can sometimes see de beautiful pink hue her voice had when I play her favourite song or even when I see de sun risin’.”

He leans back against the brick of the bridge he lives under, laughing gently. “Whenever I play for her, I feel warm in me chest. It’s like she is huggin’ me and tellin’ me that I’ll be okay. Whenever de day comes that shifters and humans can live in peace, I’ll be there to play a song in honor of me mum, who even when she found out I had a monster in me, she loved me just as much as she always did.”

[ocean-blue-whump]

Tiny Lights and Tortellini

For @flufftober Day 6: Candles, Lanterns, Fairy Lights

Cassiel Belanger belongs to @painful-pooch

Across the Stars and Through the Meadow Masterlist (Cas and Star AU)

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: BBU (vaguely mentioned), chronic illness, FLUFF! Actual sweet fluff for the Belangers

***

Star’s eyes flutter open, looking out their window at the night sky. She rolls over with a groan, buried under a heated blanket in her and Cas’s bed. He’s not with her anymore, but he sat with her at the beginning of her nap until she fell asleep. 

She winces as she sits up, leaning against her headboard and grabbing the tiny cup of pills off her nightside table and knocking them back with some water. She way overslept, but she’s grateful to her husband for not waking her up. 

Her stomach rumbles a little bit and she swings her legs to the edge of the bed, wondering if Cas made something good for dinner. God, she hopes so. She didn’t marry a good cook for no reason, after all. 

Star grabs Cas’s flannel off the end of the bed and drapes it on herself. Still smells like him, a little bit woodsy and sweet. She wears his clothes more than her own most of the time. 

She reaches for her forearm crutches, sliding her arms in and using them to stand up. A few years ago, she never could have admitted that she needed help, never would have used crutches to get around. She never could have accepted that it’s okay to use aids to help with her illness without her husband. This is all because she wants to enjoy however many years she has left and have as much freedom as possible. 

She’s happy. She’s really fucking happy. She loves her life here, her wonderful, happy little existence with her husband in their cabin. 

Star gets out of bed, using the crutches for balance as she makes her way to the door and pushes it open, but…

She stops in her tracks, staring at the floor. The hallway is dark except for a long cord of fairy lights training down the hallway. “Cas?” she calls out, but gets no answer. 

Her curiosity kicks into overdrive and she follows the strand of lights down the hall to the stairs, where the lights end and turn into a small scattering of fake tea candles. She limps down the stairs, continuing to follow the lights. 

It doesn’t end when she reaches the ground floor. There’s more lights on the ground floor making a trail towards the back porch. Star looks around, but Cas is nowhere in sight, so she presses forward, going onto the back porch and then all the way outside. 

The night air is crisp and just cold enough to be comfy, the leaves crushing underneath her slippers and crutches. The tea lights stop but are replaced by glowing lanterns and…

Cas is at the end of the trail, turning the wood over in a firepit to keep it going. 

She smiles to herself. This beautiful, crazy man, setting all this up while she was asleep. She walks forward, following the lights to her husband. 

He looks up when he sees her, smiling so brightly that Star feels like she could explode. “Lassie, yer going to get cold,” he chides her, placing one hand on her back and guiding her to a wooden chair. “Sit down, me love.”

Star blushes and sits down, feeling so incredibly warm as Cas moves the chair closer towards the fire and drapes a blanket over her. “What’s all this for?” she asks. 

Cas kisses her forehead, walking back over to a small table. “Just spoiling ye, lass. Ye deserve it.” He fiddles with something, and Star watches him closely. 

“The lights are pretty,” she says, setting her crutches next to her and snuggling up under the blanket. “And I love when you spoil me, baby.”

He walks back over holding a plate, and he sets it on the arm of the chair. “I figured ye were hungry. If not, don’t worry, lass. Me feelings aren’t hurt, ye just need to get enough food in ye.”

Star looks down at the plate, seeing a hearty serving of tri-colored tortellini and pesto cream sauce. “I’m starving, Cas. I literally could eat my own arm now, but this looks so much better.”

Cas looks flustered and he kisses her cheek. “Ye haven’t even tried it yet.”

Star gives him a look, spearing a tortellini with a fork and putting it in her mouth. “So fucking good. You’re the best cook ever.”

He takes his own plate and sits next to her, nuzzling her softly. “Nah, lassie. Yer too good to me.”

Star’s heart feels so calm and content, looking at her husband, the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with. She loves him. She loved him from the moment she saw him even if she didn’t realize it, she loved him from the white walls of the Facility to the alley they hid in to the bar to their apartment to here and to the Meadows once they’re both gone. The love they feel for each other is eternal. “No. I’m telling the truth. I love you, Cassiel Belanger. Thank you so much for doing this for me.”

Cas holds her to him and kisses her forehead, his face bright red. “I love ye more, Star Belanger. Me gorgeous wife.”

“My handsome husband,” she murmurs back, holding his hand while she picks her fork up again, her eyes sparkling with joy. “I’m so happy, Cas. I love my life with you.”

“All I want to do is make ye smile and laugh…especially since…”

She cuts him off, kissing him on the lips. “Shush. Not tonight, darling. Let’s just enjoy the moment.” 

Cas nods and kisses her again before going back to eating, and she catches him glancing at her every few seconds. 

We can think about the sad stuff later, my love. Tonight, let’s just be here. With us, how we are with each other. Let’s think about you, setting up a trail of lights to lead me here. You, cooking brightly colored pasta you know would make me smile. You, thinking of everything to make me happy all the time, and me by your side, being a loving wife for as long as I can. 

Sure, Cas. We know this won’t last forever and we don’t know how much time I have left. But we’re here tonight and you led me to you and I will always, always find my way home. 

I’ll always be here, Cas. In your heart and your soul and the lights around us. 

The sad stuff will come, but we’ll be ready for it. You and me against the world, dearest husband of mine. We’ll face it all together because this just shows how much you love me. We’re going to be okay. Even when the lights go off, we’ll be okay and we’ll find our way back to each other and this moment will be frozen in time together. 

I love you, Cas. I love your cooking and your laugh and your smile, I love your snoring and your hugs and your amber eyes. I love how you love me, how you see the whole world with a glowing brightness and make me see it too. I love everything about you. 

You’re my whole world. You’re my guiding light. All I can do is say it, over and over again because I can’t believe I got lucky enough for this to be my life. 

I love you, Cas. 

I love you.

I love you.

[ocean-blue-whump]

Just One Dance

For @flufftober Alt Prompt: Slow Dancing

Cassiel Belanger belongs to @painful-pooch

Across the Stars and Through the Meadow Masterlist (Cas and Star AU)

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: BBU, hospital setting, hallucinations mention, very strongly inspired by Beauty and the Beast

***

Star hates the hospital. She was rushed to the hospital due to a fever-induced panic attack where she clawed up her own arm and punched a dent in the wall, shattering two of the bones in her hand and two of her fingers. 

And here she is, sitting in her hospital room with an IV pumping drugs into her in a desperate attempt to lower her fever and stop her infection while a nurse is putting her wrist in a cast, covering her pinky and ring finger, going halfway down her forearm in white plaster. 

“Sorry,” she murmurs, looking over at Cas. 

He squeezes her other hand, careful not to disturb the bandages covering the injuries on her other arm. “It’s alright, lass. It’s not yer fault.” 

The nurse finishes wrapping Star’s arm. “Alright. You just give that a little bit to set, dear. We’re going to keep you overnight to see how that medication works, and someone will be in to check on you and set up your second dose through the IV. Your call button is on that table, if you’re in any pain or discomfort or you get hungry, just press it and someone will be here. Mr. Belanger, the TV remote is in that drawer, and you make sure your wife doesn’t get out of bed. I’ll have an extra brought in for you.”

“Thank ye,” Cas says with a smile as the nurse leaves. He sits in the chair closest to Star’s bed, still holding her hand. “How are ye feeling, me wee lamb?”

“I’m okay. Just a little tired,” she answers, trying to squeeze his hand back. “I’m sorry, Cas. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.”

“Ye didn’t do nothing wrong,” he reassures her, reaching out to smooth her hair with his free hand. “Andy will fix the wall, if that’s what yer worried about.”

“I’m fucking stupid,” she mumbles out. “I punched a wall. I broke half my fucking hand. All because…” She trails off, remembering how it felt to be trapped in that nightmare. How the world just swirled into white walls and Handler Greco, how all she could think about was being hurt and shocked and made good by people who just wanted to hurt her. 

Cas kisses her head, standing up to grab the remote. “Lass. Me love. Ye had an awful fever. I was afraid I was gonna lose ye, wee lamb.” He sits down on the side closest to her cast, kissing her head again. “Ye cannot control what yer brain shows ye. Ye cannot control yer fever. Me dear, ye cannot control how sick ye are. It hurts me to say it, but ye are sick, lassie. It’s not yer fault, but yer body is more likely to get a fever than me own.” He smiles softly at her and turns on the TV. “Look! Ye like this movie, right?”

Star tears her gaze away from her husband and looks at the screen, seeing Beauty and the Beast playing, only fifteen minutes in. “Yeah, I do.”

Cas reaches in his pocket for a permanent marker, kissing her cheek when he finds it. “Good lass. Just relax and let me take care of ye.”

Star snuggles underneath the thin hospital blanket, leaving her casted arm out. Her eyes are glued to the screen, but she can feel Cas doing something with the marker and her cast, scribbling away while on the TV, Belle is whisked away to the Beast’s castle. 

She sneaks a glance at her husband and sees that he’s covering her cast in tiny doodles of flowers, being so careful not to hurt her. When he catches her looking, he blushes and ducks his head, furiously blushing while he sketches out a daisy on her inner wrist, adding a few stars into the background. 

Even here in this awful hospital room, a place they’re all too familiar with, Star’s heart is full of love for Cas. He’s always there for her, even when she doesn’t want to be. It hurts to think of how she tried to push him away at the beginning. She can’t imagine being in this room. 

She’s never going to be alone again. 

Finally, the scene changes and approaches Star’s favorite part. She reaches out to Cas, a smile growing on her lips. “Help me stand up?”

“But lassie, the nurse said…”

Star cuts him off, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. “It’s just one dance, Cas. I trust you not to let me fall.”

With a soft grumble, Cas gingerly takes her by her hands, lifting her up and staring at her. “Ye tell me if ye don’t feel right, me love.”

“I will,” she whispers. It takes her a minute, but she gets her IV untangled from the bed and puts her grippy-socks clad feet onto Cas’s boots, throwing her arms around his shoulders. “I like this song.”

Cas chuckles, and the rumble from deep within his chest makes Star’s heart warm. “I know ye do, lassie.” He holds her hips, and as the music starts, he slowly starts rocking them back and forth, perfectly in sync with the soft notes of “Beauty and the Beast.”

Star is certainly no Belle. Her blue hospital gown and cast and messy hair and scarred up face are no comparison to the yellow dress and elegance of Belle, but Cas is no Beast either, no matter how much the world wants to see him as a monster. He’s her handsome, loving Scottish husband. He’s her whole world, here in this hospital room. She’s sick, that’s undeniable, with an unknown amount of time left on this world before she goes to the Meadows and waits for her love to get there. 

But for now, she’s here. She’s dancing in her hospital room with the love of her life, the man who gave her a first name and a last name and a home, and she’s perfectly happy in her hospital socks and gown because she’s not alone.

Even when she moves onto the next life, she’ll always be full of love for her Cas. 

He holds her while they dance, pressing his forehead to hers and keeping her held close. “Yer so gorgeous,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “How did I ever get so lucky?”

“I’m the lucky one,” she answers, grinning up at him. “We fought for this, baby. We earned our place in this world and I never could do it without you by my side.”

When the music starts to come to an end, Cas spins and dips her low, one hand holding her back while the other slides to her thigh. His amber eyes are full of passion and Star could lose herself in them. “Ye. Are. Perfect. Me love. Me Star.”

“My Cassiel,” she murmurs, looking up at him. “I love you so much.”

He claims her lips in a kiss, sweeping Star away, and she swears she can hear the heart monitor beep as her pulse quickens, the rhythm of her love written on the screen.

[painful-pooch]

I was thinking about how much i love Cas today and felt like i had to tell you i love him be nice to him pls

Also i really like your new blog format it looks really cool

Hope youre having a nice day 💕

Awh thank you! Not many people know much about Cassiel now since I've been so happy working with Bruno and the team. Cas is just a bb boy wanting to rid the world of racism against shapeshifters. That, and he wants to live free and happy while playing his guitar.

And thank you for the blog compliment! It took me a minute to set up because I found a really close picture of what Bruno looks like as the header. The icon is older Bruno made by @yuyinator!

[ocean-blue-whump]

Four Beautiful Years

For @flufftober Day 12: “You kept this?”

Cassiel Belanger belongs to @painful-pooch

Across the Stars and Through the Meadow Masterlist (Cas and Star AU)

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: BBU and past BBU related trauma, FLUFF

***

Star stands on her tip toes as she reaches in the closet, searching for her winter boots before she and Cas have to leave for work and failing miserably. “Goddammit, Cas,” she mutters, reaching for the stepstool. “You’re not even that tall.”

Their apartment isn’t that big and they share a small closet, leaving all their out-of-season clothes to be shoved up on the top shelf. Even with the stool, she still has to stand on her toes, struggling to find her boots. Her fingers brush across a thick blanket, then one of their jackets until she lands on a box. There, finally. Today is a good pain day and she wants to take the chance to organize her bar and put up a new string of lights, maybe some Halloween decorations too. 

She grabs the box and steps out of the closet, sitting on the bed. This worn cardboard box doesn’t seem like it has her shoes, but she doesn’t know what else it could be. Star flips the lid open and…

There, resting in the box, are items Star never wanted to see again. Two bloodstained white t-shirts, two pairs of black shorts, and two collars, the locking mechanisms smashed beyond belief. 

It’s been four years since Star and Cas wore these clothes. Four glorious years of learning how to laugh and love and watch the sun set over the city and breath fresh air. Because four years ago, they couldn’t do that. Four years ago, they were trapped in hell, being hurt and abused and told they weren’t even people. 

Star finds herself grabbing the collar and grabbing it, bringing it to her neck and holding it in place. It’s strange, feeling the harsh material against her skin, feeling like she can’t take a full breath. She hates it so much and she doesn’t know how, just four small years ago, she had accepted the rest of her short life would be spent wearing a fucking collar. She can’t imagine ever putting that stupid thing back on her neck, can’t imagine wearing a white t-shirt and black shorts and she can’t imagine a world where she doesn’t have a shitty apartment with her best friend. 

She sets the collar back in the box and stands up, carrying it all out to the kitchen. “Cas?” she calls out.

He’s at the sink washing their breakfast dishes, the sleeves of his plaid shirt rolled up to save his clothes from the pile of soap suds slowly accumulating around him. “Lassie, did ye get yer boots?”

“No. I, um…” Once he’s looking at her, she sets the box down and slides it across the counter towards him. “You kept this?”

Cas looks into the box and the color drains from his face. “Lass…” He sighs, turning off the water and wiping his hands. “Aye. I kept it.  I…I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Been a while since I’ve seen that stuff,” Star murmurs, staring at the box. “Can’t say I missed it much. You look much better in flannel than in those clothes.”

Cas blushes, his face and ears turning the same shade of red as his shirt. “Thank ye, me love.” He walks around the counter and stands behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her close. “Are ye okay?”

She leans into him, nuzzling his neck softly. “Yeah, Cas. I’m alright, but I want to know…why’d you keep it?”

“Well, lass, it reminds me to be grateful for ye and for our life together.” He keeps her held so close to him that it makes her giggle a little bit. “Even when yer in the hospital, it reminds me that I can take care of ye instead of ye suffering alone. Aye, lass, we still have our struggles, but I’m happy being with ye. I’m happy for everything we’ve made together.” He presses a kiss to the top of her head and turns her so they’re facing the living room, looking at all their pictures and pillows they picked out together. “Look what we built, me love. We did this. We made our own life outside of that place.”

The box is behind them and their whole world is in front of them, and the memories they’ve made here overpower her memories from the Facility. White walls and batons and needles fade away into movie nights and popcorn and blanket forts, pain and trauma and screaming turn into the soft strum of a guitar and cuddles on the couch and drinking coffee while watching the rain, safely warm in their apartment. Star spins around in Cas’s arms, facing him with a smile on her face. “We’re free, Cas.”

“And are ye happy?” he asks, his amber eyes scanning her face hopefully. 

She pushes herself onto her toes, kissing Cas’s nose with a tiny laugh. “You make me the happiest woman in the entire universe.”

Cas sweeps her off her feet, hugging her to his chest and nuzzling her. “Well, ye are the brightest star.”

She rolls her eyes. “You’re so fucking cheesy.”

“Ah, but ye love me,” he says with a wide smile. 

“Sometimes.”

Cas looks down at her, shock written on his face. “Lass!”

Star kisses his cheek, throwing her arms around his shoulders. “Just teasing, baby. I love you more than everything.”

[painful-pooch]

hiya! is your blog banner cas's fields? it just gives me those sort of vibes and i couldn't help but wonder

Omg thank you for asking, kind anon! It's absolutely the fields that Cas always dreams of and wishes to roam when he's free and whatnot. Cas is probably one of the few characters I have that truly appreciates nature for all its bountiful glory.

I'll even throw in this little tid bit. So he has synesthesia, which means he sees colors from sounds he hears. So when he hears certain symphonies, he just sees the most beautiful array of colors swirling around him, almost as though there is magic in the air! Well the same thing happens when he's in the meadows and fields! He feels as though he's treading over rainbows and beauty.

I hope you enjoy the thoughts of him rolling around in the grass and laughing!

[ocean-blue-whump]

Let's see, girl...

Gimme Ray and I'll give you Cas hahshsvash

Alright, here it is! (For those who don't know, Ray is who Comet originally was in the Sunny and Star series)

Asks are still open!

***

Ray Tehrani stops on the side of the pathway, bending over and resting his hands on his knees. His run winded him, but he won't have time to work out after his shift. With a groan, he straightens up and uses the hem of his shirt to wipe his face, the EMS logo clearly visible on the back. He gives a small wave to a passerby and starts walking in the direction of his apartment, "September" blaring loudly in his headphones.

After fixing his ponytail, he accidently knocks one earbud out of place, and that's when he hears the soft sound of a guitar and a gorgeous voice alongside it. Ray pockets his earbuds to listen. He can't help himself from heading in the direction of the song.

The young man playing acoustic guitar can't be much younger, and the open guitar case at his feet has a few dollars and a scattering of coins. Ray squats down to add a twenty dollar bill to the case, but as he does, he sees a nasty looking cut on the man's cheekbone. Looks like the guy was jumped or someone tried to mug him. "Hey there, want me to take a look at that?" he asks, pointing to the cut.

The man stops playing guitar and looks confused, and Ray puts his hands up, grinning. "Don't worry, man. I won't charge you for it. It's just an offer so your cut doesn't get infected. I promise, if you say yes, there's no strings attached."

[painful-pooch]

Beasts Can't Love Anyone

This is for @febuwhump day 7: Used as an Experiment.

Taglist: @shapeshiftersandfire, @whumper-in-training, @emcscared-whumps, and @ocean-blue-whump

Cassiel Masterlist (coming soon)

CW: Pet whump, collars, muzzles, needles, forced drugging, major character death, fighting ring, death threats, gun violence, long term captivity, and dehumanization.

It was like any other day in the derelict cells of the fighting ring building; inedible food being passed around the shifters, some of them tending to their wounds, others working on their technique to win in the fight. The sounds of shouting and cheering can be heard, and all the shifters go silent, staring down the hallway, knowing that when the fight is over, there is a chance only one of them will return.

It was a cruel existence, but they were all used to it. They knew no one cared about them. No one would be fighting for their freedom, their rights, and their lives. Well, not no one… There was a special pair of fighters among them that always seemed to care for them in some way.

Cassiel, the gentle dire wolf, and Acacius, the playful arctic fox, were the only two in that facility that refused to truly fight as hard as the others. More like Cassiel convinced Acacius that life was meant for something better; something that didn’t involve blood shed.

They were one of the few beacons of hope in that hellhole, the duo always finding ways to make others smile, laugh, and feel as though their lives weren’t truly over yet; that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and they would fight for them rather than each other. It was better to focus on them rather than pay attention to the telltale sound of chains rattling as the winner returns, though they don’t look like a winner.

Cassiel licked his lips and rubbed the back of his neck while he hummed a soft tune, knowing that he should probably wake up his partner considering he knew what was about to happen to them both. He looked down at Acacius, admiring the beautiful white hair he was playing with and smiled gently before poking his cheek. He rolled his eyes when Acacius mumbled something about napping being important and curling up more.

Cas could still remember the day he first met Acacius. Funnily enough, they had met in the same place that sorted them into their designations. He and Cas both were sent to the fighting rings and as time went on, both of them ended up bonding with each other to the point that they decided to do something unheard of in the world of the fighting ring; they imprinted on one another.

It was unheard of because if a shifter loses their imprinted partner, then they feel their pain, even until death. It would be a miserable way to lose someone, considering there is usually a death once a week. Cas didn’t want to think about it and he was more than happy to live every second with Acacius, no matter how much time they both had left.

Cas poked his cheek one more time and his partner opened his bright green eyes, looking up. “Well good mornin' to ye. Ye seemed to have a good dream, no?” Cas asked with his iconic Scottish accent, receiving a lazy grin from the fox shifter.

“As good as I can get here, babe. Did another fight just happen?” Acacius asked, glancing around and seeing the overall downtrodden mood of the cages. “I don’t think I need an answer for that one? Who’s next?”

Cas smiled sadly and looked away, rubbing the back of his neck, a usual tick he has when he is hiding something.

“Cas… Who is fighting next? They should have said something.”

“Well, ye know who hasn’t fought dis week. It’s de last fight of de day and de weekend. Dey saved it for last…”

That made Acacius’ eyes widen, his beautiful eyes marred by the fear so evident in them. “No, you can’t mean that we would be fighting…”

His heart wanted to shatter at those words, not wanting to believe it, not wanting to accept the fate that would be handed down to them by the very people that wanted to make an example out of them. “Aye, dey want us to fight.”

“I won’t fight you, Cas. I refuse. I won’t fight you!” Acacius shouted, holding his face and kissing him deeply until he pulled away. “I love you.”

“I love ye too, but dey’ll hurt ye if ye don’t do what they say. Especially in a fight with me. Ye know I earn dem de most…” He trailed off. Being a dire wolf shifter was so rare, people have sent their life savings to at least catch a glimpse of the mystical animal that he can become.

Acacius shook his head and crossed his arms, pouting. “No, I don’t care. I love you too much to even think of having to hurt you.” He stood up and held onto the bars of their cell. “You hear me?! I AM NOT FIGHTING IN YOUR STUPID GAMES!”

Cas jumped up and held Acacius to him, kissing his head. “Ye know better dan to shout at dem. Now dey are goin' to take me away from ye. Promise me somethin'?”

“What? What do you want me to promise you, Cas? I promised you I wouldn’t hurt you. Not just because we are bonded together, but because I love you. They can hurt me all they want, but I won’t hurt you.”

“Promise me ye’ll love me, no matter what happens?”

“...”

“Acaius please…”

“Cassiel Ohazia Belanger, I will always love you. No matter what. I don’t care if they call you a beast. I know you aren’t one. I know the real you.”

“Thank ye, Acacius Reijo Bolstad. When dis is all over, we can cuddle, and I can sing ye yer favorite song.”

Acacius pressed his face into Cas’ chest as Cas began to sing so softly, his voice melodic as always, carrying and lifting the spirits of not only his partner, but of the other fighters in the vicinity. It was almost as though time stopped just long enough for Cas to bear his soul out.

Acacius smirked and raised an eyebrow. “Well what is stopping you from singing to me now, hmmm?”

Cas laughed and rubbed his partner’s cheeks so lovingly, getting lost in his eyes and remembering the day they spoke about going and running in the meadow, free from the bonds of their captivity. “I can sing for ye, me love.”

But life wasn’t kind to worthless shifters like him and the others.

“Hey! Both of you let go of each other! We have shit to do today!” One of the guards shouted, banging on the bars with his baton and stopping the singing.

Cas looked down at his Acacius, kissing his forehead and stepping back, knowing the protocol. He dropped to his knees, his hands behind him while another guard attached the leash and manacles. “I’ll see ye after de fight.”

Of course, things were never so easy when it came to his partner.

Acacius growled and crossed his arms. “I am not fighting him. You can’t make me!” He shouted before shifting and growling at the guards who now had their weapons aimed at him.

“Acacius please! Don’t-” he was cut off abruptly by the muzzle placed on him as a precaution. Can’t have an animal of his caliber roaming the facility, especially when his jaw strength was powerful enough to break a metal muzzle.

It was horrifying to see it and Cas struggled as he was being dragged away, hearing a guard say, “No, we won’t make you… We can just make him.”

Please don’t make me hurt him!

Shots were fired.

Please stop hurting him!

Yipping and cries of pain were heard.

Make it stop!

Cas saw his partner’s white fur have flecks of red in it.

He cried out when the pain reached his brain, his bonded, his imprinted partner hurting as they now writhed on the floor to fight the sedatives. The last thing he saw before he was shoved around the corner was Acacius’ eyes making contact with his own.

There was nothing he could do now. He was taken to the room they put all the shifters in before they went out to fight, the guards shoving him down to his knees and removing the muzzle and manacles.

“Please make sure he’s ok- agh!” He yelled when he was bashed in the face, falling over and crying.

Another kick was driven into his chest, knocking out the air from the gentle shifter before a voice spat back, “You don’t get to talk. You just stay still or I will have that stupid ass fox get killed. Got it?”

The collar around Cas’ neck was removed, his sensitive neck feeling the cool air around it before they placed a heavy titanium collar around him. It was the collar they had specially made for him since he grew to an abnormal size.

A guard approached him with a syringe and that made Cas jump up and press his back to the wall, tears in his eyes. “Please no.. no no no no no no! I’ll be good! I don’t want de needle! I’ll be a good lad!” But the guard only got closer to the shifter.

Until the needle was jabbed into his arm and the plunger pressed down, the black substance going right into him. “What did ye give me?” He asked, so lost as to what could have been in the concoction.

“Something to make this fight more interesting. Nice vitamins for the shifter you are. Don’t worry about it. We’re gonna go now. Also… Have fun. We’re betting on you,” the other guard answered with a smirk, all the guards walking out and locking the door.

This is not good… they usually don’t leave since they force me out of the room. I wonder why they did th-

The room turned still, the sound of the drums- no, his heart- pounding violently in his chest, and his eyes focusing on the gate that will soon open. Something wasn’t right and Cas pressed himself against the wall, beads of sweat now running down the back of his neck and down his muscular body that was still covered in scars from previous battles.

He had an unquenchable thirst which rocked his world, but it wasn’t for water. It was for something thicker, something warm, something that can give him sustainment, and something he can bite into. It was rage that now turned his vision red, Cas holding his head and trembling, grinding his teeth, now fangs, and he looked deep into himself, trying to patch up anything that he could mentally. “No… No no no no! I can’t be a beast!” He bellowed in his most angered voice while fear made it almost crack.

His mind was betraying him and the humanity he wished to hold close to his soul. Facing his inner beast was a battle between the benevolent Scottish shifter and this… monster that was held back by the chains forged by a deep magic. He stared into the blood red eyes of what seemed to be a demon in the form of a wolf, the fur on its hide shimmering with shadows and fangs that already seemed ready to sink into its prey.

“No, don’t make me a beast. Please… I can’t… I can’t control meself. I don’t want to hurt anyone,” he whispered to himself, to which he was returned with a demonic laugh, an overwhelming feeling of dread washing over him.

Oh? You wish to not be a beast? Cassiel… You cannot change what you are simply because you refuse to be one. You will heed to my command.

“It’s Acacius! I can’t hurt him! I love him and he’s me love!” He screamed, the sounds of chains rattling filling his head. He could feel the world slowly slipping out of his grasp, the Beast inside of him taking over.

You are an idiot. A fool to ever think you can love someone. Do you know what you are? Well? You want to sniffle and cry like a pathetic mutt or do you want to show the world what you are?

“I want to run in de meadows and be free. Play music… I-” he choked on the air, falling to his hands and knees, his back arched, his fist pounding into the ground as the sound of the gate in front of him started to open.

The light of the arena seeped in, the white fur of his companion, tinted red due to his vision, visible. They were chained to the wall by a long chain, just like he was, both prepared to fight. He opened his mouth to scream, but the voice in his head was louder.

Beasts can not love anyone. I will teach you this lesson, Cassiel. Face it. You will thank me one day.

Cas last remembered feeling himself turn into something far more larger than he could ever hope to become. He wasn’t in control anymore. The Beast was and it was going to make an example out of Acacius.

All he could do is wade in the darkness, looking for any way to fight his way back into control. That was the thing with the Beast; Cas could never remember what happened during it all, but when he woke up, it was never a good thing.

After what could be described as eons of being in the dark, a voice rang out loud.

Don’t ever forget my lesson to you, Cassiel.

Blood.

That was all he could tell there was when his eyes opened. Cas' heart was going faster than he had ever thought possible, almost painful in nature. The metallic taste was wretched in his mouth... dripping from his fangs and maw as he slowly came to. He was standing over something that seemed to be devoid of life.

What's going on? He thought to himself, finally having control over his mind, the Beast gone.

The red haze slowly disappeared and there before him was Acacius, the arctic wolf shifter. There was no white fur... only red fur that was now matted up. He wasn’t moving. There was no rise or fall of his chest, no light in his eyes, and so much blood outside of his body. There was a stench in the air that he could tell without a doubt what it was…

Death.

Cas backed up slowly, his tail in between his legs as he had realized the horrors he had committed. The Beast… no… He killed his best friend, his one and only, his imprinted partner. A pain was now radiating all over his body, his heart threatening to stop to atone for his sin.

The world turned grey for him, not a single thing in existence holding any sort of meaning to him. The clapping and cheering that he was the winner was not heard by him, but rather the last few words he could remember Acacius telling him.

“Cassiel Ohazia Belanger, I will always love you. No matter what. I don’t care if they call you a beast. I know you aren’t one. I know the real you… Well what is stopping you from singing to me now, hmmm?”

Cas tilted his head back, his ears low as he howled in a lamentful tune, knowing the others in the back would be able to hear. Memories of the man he once loved now filled his mind and he couldn’t stop himself from tearing up, the tears running down his fur.

The booing around him caused him to stop and when he saw Acacius’ body being dragged back by the chain, he leapt forward in an attempt to be close to his love once more. That was when his own chain was being pulled back and no matter how hard he fought, he was being pulled away and soon the arena was gone.

Once he shifted back, he curled up in the now lonely cell and screamed to the high heavens to forgive him of his mistakes while the words he heard earlier continued to torment him.

Beasts can’t love anyone. I am sorry, Acacius. I am a Beast… I am a Beast.

[ocean-blue-whump]

Where’s Cas?

For @febuwhump Day 19: Delirium.

For @painful-pooch my love. This is not exactly the comfort I promised hehe.

Cas/Star AU tag ||  (Canon) Star Masterlist || (Canon) Cas tag

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: BBU, former pets, fever, pet whump ish, sickfic, hallucination, lady whump, ends in fluff, hospital

***

Star is melting into the sheets of the bed. Her fingers grip the pillow, her breath comes in short, shallow gasps. She eyes the glass of water sitting on the side table, but her vision blurs and she groans, burying her face in a blanket. “C-Cas?” she calls out weakly, before realizing that Cas left for work two hours ago. Right. Cas left. How did she forget that?

Her head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton, but at least she’s remembering now, how she was barely able to convince him to go, that it was fine. Still, he looked so worried when he left…

Star pulls herself to a sitting position. Se should get some water, take her temperature, get some meds. Instead, she picks up her phone. It’s just a flip phone with nine buttons, each programmed to dial a different number. She doesn’t have a smart phone, she wouldn’t be able to read the screen and type.

“Cas?” she calls out again, but doesn’t get an answer.

Fuck. Where is he? Why did he leave her? She needs the love of her life, needs him to hold her and take care of her.

Star’s hands tremble as she presses the third button, dialing Tina, one of their coworkers from the bar.

“Star? You’re supposed to be asleep. What’s going on?” Tina answers, the chatter of the bar audible in the background.

“Cas. Where’s Cas?” Star’s throat is painfully dry but she barely has enough strength to hold the phone to her ear.

“He’s here. He’s at the bar. Babe, are you okay? You don’t sound too good.”

Star’s brain searches for an answer, her thoughts running around in circles. Sweat drips down the back of her neck. “At the bar, at the bar, why is he at the bar?”

Tina pauses a moment before answering. “Because he has work. And if we weren’t so backed up, I’d ask if Russo could send him home. Star, can you do something for me?”

“N-no.” Star groans weakly. Her clothes, the sheets, they’re all sticking to her, she’s hot but she’s shivering and her skin is oversensitive, each bead of sweat makes her want to cry. The leather bracelet around her wrist is too heavy, she rips it off. “Who—who am I talking to?”

“Shit. Star, it’s Tina. Hey, listen to me. Cas said there’s a thermometer in the top drawer of the nightstand. I know you can’t read the number, but can you tell me what color it lights up?”

Panic bubbles up in Star’s chest. “W-where’s Cas?”

“He’s at the bar. He’s okay. You’re okay. Just get the thermometer and put it under your tongue.”

Star leans over in the side drawer and fumbles around for it, her vision spotty. She puts it where Tina told her to, waiting patiently.

“Star? You still there? Give me the color.”

Star pulls the thermometer out of her mouth. “It’s r-r-red.”

“I really wish you could read right now, babe. Just hang tight.”

“I don’t feel too good.” Tears prick at the corners of her eyes, she sniffles. “Where’s Cas? I want Cas, why did he leave me?”

“He didn’t leave you. He’s at the bar. Fuck, this is bad.”

“I don’t, um, I don’t feel so good.”

“Can you tell me what hurts?”

Star strips down to her undergarments, overwhelmed by heat. “My head and stomach and it feels so wrong,” she says, trailing off into a whimper and hiding her head.

When she looks back up…she doesn’t know where she is. 728501 looks around the strange room, her hands going to her neck, where there should be a collar but isn’t one. “My collar,” she says. “Where’s my collar? Handler Greco’s going to be mad, so mad…”

“Fuck! Star, please, listen to my voice.”

Star flinches at the sound coming from the phone, a single teardrop sliding down her face. “Who are you and who, who’s Star?”

“My name is Tina. I’m your friend. Your name is Star soon-to-be Belanger. You’re marrying the love of your life in two weeks. Please, I need you to remember.”

“Pets don’t get married.” The sweat has soaked into the roots of her hair now, shes so gross and sticky but she won’t get to shower until Handler Greco lets her.

“Babe, just hold on.” The girl on the other end—Tina—sounds frantic, setting the phone down on something. 728501 can still hear her talking. “Cas. Was Star acting off when you left?”

“A wee bit,” a man’s voice answers. 728501 doesn’t know who it is, but for some reason, the voice calms her a little bit, enough to get her shaky breathing under control.

“She doesn’t remember her name, or me, or anything. She’s got a fever. You need to go talk to Russo and see if he can call a replacement. I’m worried. She sounds…bad, Cas. I haven’t heard her like this in a while.”

“He can’t go. The kitchen is so backed up. I’ll ask Russo to let me go. I’m not the only bouncer tonight,” another male voice says. “I won’t be needed. You will, Cas.”

“But she’s me love!” the first man protests.

“It doesn’t matter,” the woman snaps. 728501 has forgotten her name because she’s a dumb mutt, just good at attacking. “Figure it out and fast.” The phone is picked up again. “Hey, Star, someone’s going to come help you, okay? Just don’t move. Stay in bed.”

“W-who’s Star?”

The woman sighs. “You are. It’s going to be okay. Please, try to—”

728501 slams the lid of the phone shut and throws it across the room. Handler Greco’s going to be mad, she doesn’t have her collar on. This isn’t the Facility, these aren’t white walls and that scares her. She’s not safe, she’s never safe.

The sweat dripping across her body is sending her into panic mode, her chest heaves. She can’t breathe. She can’t do this, whatever this is. She needs Handler Greco.

“I’m right here,” he says, settling on the bed behind her, running his hand through her hair. “Someone’s been bad, hasn’t she?”

728501 freezes, torn between running and obeying and she feels like death. “Yes, Handler.”

“Running away.” He clicks his tongue. “You’re not allowed to do that.”

How is he here, wherever here is?

He’s part of the reason she’s sick, 728501 knows that much. “I’m sorry, Handler.”

“You should be. Position two.”

728501 is moving without thinking despite how it makes her stomach turn and vision blur, dropping to her knees on the floor.

Wait…

This isn’t right. Handler Greco can’t be here. 728501 doesn’t know why, but she feels it deep within herself. She tries to stand up, but her muscles won’t move and it hurts so badly she feels like she could pass out at any minute.

“I did a number on you, didn’t I?” Handler Greco chuckles.

“Y-you’re not real,” 728501 stammers out.

“Finally. Using your brain. Good mutt.”

She’s crying freely now, the tears joining sweat to dampen her cheeks. “Go away.”

“Yeah. I can. But I’ll always be with you. After all, I’m the reason you’re sick. I’m the reason you probably won’t live past 25. 27, max.”

“F-fuck you.”

His hand is heavy on the back of her neck. “You know I’m right.”

“You’re not real.”

“No. But look. I still control you. I can still make you cry.”

The door swings open, rattling the whole apartment. “Star? Star, it’s Andy!”

Handler Greco smiles. “Bye, 501. We’ll see each other again.”

She keeps crying, even once he’s gone.

A tall, muscular man with a buzz cut, a beard and scars on his head kneels down in front of her.

728501’s eyes light up with fear, she slides backwards. “W-who are you?”

He holds up his hands. “My name is Andy. I’m here because of Cas.”

“Who’s Cas?”

Why does this man look like he’s about to cry? “He’s yours. And he really wants to be here right now but he can’t.”

“I don’t understand.” 728501’s stomach turns, she would throw up if she had anything in her.

“Look at me, short fry.” His calloused thumb runs across her cheek, brushing the tears away. “How about I get you into bed? Alright?”

728501 weakly nods, letting Andy lift her up and set her back down in the sheets. “Where am I?” she asks, her voice hoarse.

“You’re at your apartment. You share it with Cas.” He tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. “You gave us one hell of a scare, short fry. Can you open your mouth so I can take your temperature?”

728501 listens and obeys.

Andy frowns when he gets the reading. “Alright. That’s bad. Really bad. I’m going to call Cas, alright? I’ll put him on speakerphone for you.”

“Who’s Cas?” 728501 asks.

Andy sighs and just dials the number. “Cas, buddy, we have a problem,” he says once it connects.

728501 loves the voice that answers back. “Aye, I figured. How’s me wee lamb?”

“Fever of 104.”

Fever? Handler Greco only gave her fevers with the drugs when she was bad. Was she bad?

Andy shoves something towards her. “Look at this. I’ll be right back.” He passes 728501 a picture frame before jogging off, leaving 728501 only able to catch the last thing he says. “I don’t know, bud, I think she needs to go to the hospital.”

728501 stares down at the picture. It’s of a man with amber eyes and she immediately finds herself drawn to him, tracing her finger over his face. Why?

Because he named you. Because he saved you and you saved him.

Because you love him more than life itself.

She keeps her fingers tracing across the man’s face in the picture until the other man comes back.

728501 has already forgotten his name.

He leans over her. “Hey, short fry. How are you doing?”

She shakes her head. She’s too tired to ask the man his name.

He sighs and scoops her up; 728501 stiffens in his arms. “I’ve got you. I’m going to take you to the hospital and Cas will meet us there.” He looks nervous, shifting around. “We got to get my favorite bartender all healed up.”

“I can be good,” 728501 whispers.

The man looks at her, horrified. “I don’t want you to be good. I just…go to sleep. It’ll be okay when you wake up.”

She doesn’t know why she trusts this man, but she falls asleep in his arms, her head against his bicep.

***

Star’s eyes flutter open, she takes a ragged gasp and looks around. She’s in a hospital room, an IV in her hand connected to a bag of clear fluids. Panic builds in her chest—until she sees him, Cas, asleep on an uncomfortable chair. The love of her life.

Cas’s eyes flutter open and his face lights up when he sees her. “Lass!”

“He was here,” she croaks out. “Greco was here.”

His brow furrows. “No, me love. It was yer imagination.”

“Oh.” Star slides over to make room for Cas as he settles next to her in the bed. “I’m sorry if I scared you.”

He presses a kiss to the top of her head. “It’s okay. I’m happy yer safe.”

She hums happily and nuzzles into his arms. “Don’t ever leave me.”

“Never.”

[ocean-blue-whump]

Tonight It’s Real

Cassiel Belanger belongs to @painful-pooch <3

Across the Stars and Through the Meadow Masterlist (Cas and Star AU)

Tagging the Star crew: @ashintheairlikesnow @whumpinggrounds @whumptakesthecake @justplainwhump @whumpfessional @winedark-whump

CW: referenced pet whump/BBU, angsty comfort, terminally ill whumpee, hospital whump

***

Star, in her slight drug-induced haze, watches her gorgeous, shirtless husband cook her dinner. They got home from the hospital late last night once her fever had passed, and spent most of today in bed. 

In bed with his muscles…

Star shamelessly stares at him and wonders how she got so lucky. He had scooped her out of bed, kissed her on the forehead, and told her he’d make her pasta for dinner, carried her in his strong arms and set her down on the couch. Even though he hates needles, he helped her get her IV connected to her port to run her at-home infusion, draped a flannel blanket over her legs and kissed her again. 

He did the buttons on her shirt so she didn’t have to struggle on her own, called Russo and told him they needed time off, tied her hair out of her face with his gentle, giant hands, helped her slide her wedding ring on. 

Tonight feels like one of those nights where they’re all too aware of their situation. All too aware of how fragile she is, of how they’re running out of time together. Of how the pills on the table equal extra minutes they’ll get before she has to say goodbye to her true love. 

It’s one of those nights where everything is right and wrong at the same time. 

She looks up at the fairy lights above her head, at the walls around her. She knows each scuff mark, each picture, each story. Not as well as she knows Cas’s body. Knows the scars and divots and strong curves of muscle. She knows him better than she knows herself, and she loves every part of him. 

He dashes some olive oil into a pan and looks back to smile at her. 

She grins in return. Her beautiful, wonderful, amazing husband who she belongs to completely, and him to her, body, mind, and soul. Each aspect of their lives, they share. 

He can’t promise her forever, but he did anyways in his vows. 

Her husband looks unbelievably attractive in a suit, too. He looks attractive when doing anything, though. She just wants him to finish cooking so she can bury herself in his chest and be completely enveloped by her sexy Scottish man. 

She’s so in love with him, every aspect of Cassiel Belanger couldn’t be more perfect. 

It’s funny, it’s almost as though they were meant to find each other. But she’s never been a big believer in fate. They worked for this. They found each other when they needed it most. 728501 and 496173. Handler Greco’s prized possession and the man who couldn’t seem to forget his name. They found each other through violence, the fight the handlers wanted that never happened. 

They found each other on the bathroom floor in the bar, Cas bleeding from the head and Star’s clothes torn apart. They found each other in a hospital room over and over as Star’s health ebbed and flowed. They lost each other in a hospital room too. They lost each other in a warehouse, they found each other in Faraday Abernathy’s mansion bearing more scars than before. They found each other and turned a white room to a street corner to an apartment. 

Star holds her regrets so close to her head. She regrets not loving him sooner, she regrets hiding so much from him. 

He carries her. He always carries her and he’s never going to stop until she’s gone. 

Tonight is just one of those nights where everything feels real. 

Her impending fate, a slow, painful death with no way to stop it, just delay the inevitable. 

More importantly, though, their love feels real, like she can reach through the air and touch it. Little golden threads connecting her to her husband forever and always. 

She can’t let go. She could never but it’s something she has to accept. 

Star had accepted it at the beginning, was ready to stop taking her meds and die as quickly as possible. But then she learned that she was allowed to let herself be loved.

Maybe she wasn’t all bad, she wasn’t just a mutt after all. 

She has value, and that value was given to her over and over by Cassiel Belanger. 

Not many people are lucky enough to find a love like theirs. A love that’s not perfect and quiet but a fiery love, battle tested and hard earned, a love built to last. 

Certainly not a pure love with the way she’s staring at him. Cas being shirtless does things to her.

Cas and the lamb, always and forever, forevermore free. The ending she’s always wanted but never thought she was good enough to earn. 

When she dies, she won’t remember the bad stuff. Faraday and Rhys, the bar bathroom, her bad decisions made before their marriage, Handler Greco. Dr. Roth said she might lose some of her memory as her disease progresses, and she knows what she needs to hold onto. 

It’s little snapshots and little moments in time. 

Cas’s face lighting up when they first walked into their apartment. 

Buying their first Christmas tree together and decorating it together. 

Dancing in their living room to the Beauty and the Beast soundtrack, her standing on Cas’s feet in a yellow sundress, him singing so softly to her. 

Cas rushing into her hospital room and doing his best every single time she’s there to make it feel more like home. 

Him feeding her soup when her hands are too weak to hold a spoon. 

Her burying herself against him, a blanket covering them both up, smelling the forest on his shirt.

Their wedding, seeing her future husband waiting for her after all the times they’ve suffered. 

Could a pet, a monster, have loved like this? Could a lab-created dog have such a vibrant life? 

No. 

It’s through Cas that she realized that she isn’t a pet and never was, that WRU lied to them. 

They’re not dogs. 

They’re people who love and hurt and cry and smile. Real people who will be missed when they’re gone. 

And maybe this feeling of being real can be overwhelming. If one thing is real, it’s all real, the good and the bad. 

Overwhelming is good because it reminds her that she’s still here. 

“Cas,” she murmurs. “Leave the food.”

He looks over at her in a mix of confusion and worry. She knows what’s going through his mind, the fears that immediately crop up. She could be feeling sick and need to go to the hospital where the doctors will try to rip her away from him again while her body breaks down. She could be denying herself food as a punishment for doing something wrong. Or it could be a flashback or trauma response because she doesn’t eat during those and that’s a whole other set of problems. 

She just smiles and reaches her slender, scarred, strong hands out towards him, a bruise still on the back from her IV. “Leave the food,” she repeats. “Leave the food and get your gorgeous self over here to hold your wife.” 

Star feels like dancing tonight. She feels like dancing and running and jumping around, but she knows she has limits and tonight? She should just relax and let Cas take care of her. 

It was hard to acknowledge that. Hard acknowledging she couldn’t be the fighter she once was. To take that leap…it was painful. She was trained to be better than this. Trained to fight through pain, except when she feels pain, she knows now it’s a sign that something worse could be brewing in her. 

Accepting her limits was a good decision. It makes the good days great and the bad days bearable. There’s good in taking a break. 

She’ll always be his lamb, no matter what he does. 

His lamb in a white t-shirt and black shorts and a collar. 

His lamb behind the bar mixing up a drink. 

His lamb in a hospital bed, tubes all over her body. 

His lamb, forever and always. 

Cassiel Belanger, making dinner for her while shirtless because he knows she likes to watch him, smiles at her and kisses her so softly, like she’s the most precious thing in the world. 

Cassiel and Star Belanger, together forever. 

[painful-pooch]

For the five sentence fic - “A sharp scream rings through the bar, followed by a glass breaking and a flash of red.”

Tw: BBU (barely mentioned, more or less implied), blood, abuse, mentions of chronic pain

Star Belanger belongs to @ocean-blue-whump!!!!

Cassiel has been working in the back of the bar, cooking up his usual food for the patrons out front. It's honestly a lot of fun because whenever he is done cooking something, he gets to kiss the love of his life, his wee lamb Star. She's always smiling at him from the window between the bar and the kitchen, waiting for the next order to come out. He cooks faster when he knows she's there, because each order means a kiss and her hand against his cheek.

He loves to see her look up at him, her juniper eyes dazzling with love, hiding the pain she is going through underneath while her laugh, infectious and soft pink like a sunset, fills his ears. He knows she's always in pain, having to drink here and there. He can't stop her, but he wishes she would stop hurting herself and see what they could both do to distract her from the pain.

He only wants to cherish her for as long as she can, even if it means he has to break himself to make it happen. He rarely sleeps, but he is able to stand, smile, work, and most of all, gaze at his love while taking care of her. He finishes an order and he goes to the pass to ring the bell with the spatula. "Me love? Order nomber three is ready!" He calls out, his smile growing when she appears.

"You always look adorable there, Cas," Star laughs, her voice making him see a gentle shade pink in his vision. She leans up to kiss him and carress his cheek, the patrons of the bar cheering and raising their glasses. She pulls away to roll her eyes. "Seems like I wasn't the only one who noticed. I love you," she whispers, kissing his nose before walking off with the order.

Cas is in heaven, blushing and practically drooling after his amazing wife. He turns back to start working, humming to himself and getting back into the groove of things, trying to cash in another kiss soon. A few minutes go by, Cas wiping his sweat away using his kitchen rag when he heard something.

A sharp scream rings through the bar, followed by a glass breaking and a flash of red. The only times he sees red like that is when he was being spoken to by Rowan, but Rowan can't be there, so then... it means Star screamed. Cas drops his spatula and barges out of the kitchen, seeing Star on the floor, crimson red dripping to the floor with glass around her. "Lass!"

He rushes to her side and for some unknown reason, his vision turns fully red, glaring up at the laughing man on the other side of the counter.

"She's a stupid bartender. She messed up my order, so I gave it right to her. You got a pro-"

Too bad the man didn't expect to see Cas lunge over the counter, his snarl deep and his own voice scaring him. "I should rip yer fockin' throat out, eh? Get out of me bar!" Cas has no control of himself when his fist connected with the man's jaw, sending him tumbling back. Cas can feel his heart racing and before he can stop himself, he sees the world spin around him, crumpling to the floor.

The last thing he can hear is the wonderful voice of his wife. "Cas! Wake up, baby, please!"