#certified stoner moment

[starscarp]

YEAH I'M 21 NOW BITCHES

[johngaiussimp]

Locked Tomb UQuiz Masterpost!

Hellllooooo. I make a lot of uquizzes on Twitter for fun. i post/make them at various levels of seriousness, so they are mostly the farthest thing from professional and pretty horny and silly.* But if you want to take a bunch of locked tomb personality quizzes made by a silly nerd, here’s a list from over the years!

Every quiz is probably NSFW lol. More recent ones have Nona spoilers (at the bottom of list)

There are also other quizzes that are by other amazing people, take their quizzes too (too stoned to figure out how to find all those) (if you want to reblog with your own quizzes pls do so)

here you gooooooo. 

Which Ianthe vibe are you?

Which Griddlehark quote/moment are you?

Which goth Harrow nickname are you?

Which name does Harrowhark Nonagesimus call you?

How fucked up are you? (based on a very specific TLT measurement) 

Which hilarious Mercymorn insult are you?

What does your TLT House say about you as a lover?

What sexy Cytherea moment are you?

What TLT meme are you?

Which article of Harrowhark’s clothing are you?

What type of cavalier are you?

How quickly would you die in Canaan House?

What does Ianthe call you?

Which TLT woman are you going on a hot date with?

Which Third House au plot point are you?

Which Ninth House feature/element are you?

Which fake TLT academic journal title are you?

What makkachinning Griddlehark AU are you? 

Answer would you rather questions and get assigned a TLT wife!

How well do you know Ianthe Tridentarius? 

Analyze this Gideon and Ianthe banter scene and I’ll guess your astrological sign incorrectly. 

Choose your own adventure TLT au (which original Lyctor are you?)

Which piece of TLT underwear are you?

Answer FMK - get assigned a strange TLT au of my own creation.

Which cursed TWT fan TLT moment are you (would you rather)

Which certified TLT stoner are you?

Answer some Qs and get assigned a TLT hottie and a Taylor Swift song 

Which BOE prisoner are you from “As yet Unsent”

Which brat Ianthe moment /emoji are u???

How long could you stay married with Ianthe?

Which false homestuck reference in TLT are you?

Match a reaction image to TLT characters and get assigned a TLT ex-gf

Which TLT cat are you? 

Which form of Alecto are you going to date?

What interpretation of Mercymorn’s drawing of a RB are you?

What is your TLT toxic trait (character edition)? 

What is your TLT love language? 

What is your job during the Great Jizz Heist? 

What’s your toxic tlt trait (fandom edition)?

Top, bottom or switch, TLT edition

Which arcane x tlt ship are you?

Which line from the Nona book summary are you?

who is your TLT secret santa and what do they get you?

R u hole or slick or knot? decorate a christmas tree.

What Tor nona cover promotion tweet are you?

What Nona cover detail are you?

Which horny TLT moment are you?

Who is your TLT one night stand?

Who in Bridgerton are you? (TLT x bridgerton )

which Locked Tomb villain are you?

What kind of ass would Ianthe flesh magic onto you?

Whose strap are you []ing tonight?

Who is your 2022 TLT pride crew?

Are you top bottom or switch (nona edition)? 

Which name does Pyrrha call you? 

*Please note that these quizzes are made by a freak who is friends with freaks and doesn’t fuck with trying to police other ppls shipping choices lmao. 

[the-angriest-author]

Writeblr intro

Hallooo..

not sure if I'm doing this right... tbh, idek what to put on here. Anyhow, I've been writing for about two years now (YAY!!). I mostly write poetry although as I write this most of my posts are short stories of the fantasy variety. I like reading swoon-worthy romances so if you write anything that makes me blush and kick my feet like the teenage girl I am, I will follow you and maybe stalk all your posts. If you are the grammar police I must warn you that you will be forced to arrest me after reading my posts (I'M WORKING ON IT, not really tho).

I've been on Tumblr for idk how long but I keep ghosting the app (Life and whatnot) I'm craving community, especially with fellow authors, maybe ones with more writing experience (I am a newbiiieee). Guys... I swear I won't ghost again 🤭.

And here are all my labels for all my lovely people:

She/Her

WOC

Queer (bi or pan idek man this sexuality shit aint for the weak of heart)

Retired Stoner (Moved to a place where I can't smoke)

Raging bitch (Moved to a place where I can't smoke)

Capricorn Sun, Sagittarius Moon, Capricorn Rising (Raging Bitch)

Not actually a raging bitch, just think it's funny (Please like me)

ADHD (Prone to run on sentences and overusing parentheses)

Chronically misunderstood (Capricorn)

Very Annoying (Sagittarius Moon)

Certifiably Woo-Woo (Hence the astrology references)

Not Funny (I think I'm hilarious and spent 5 minutes straight laughing at this little section)

Current WIPS

To The Stranger Who Stumbles ~ A collection of poetry written during a time of my life when I was experiencing some intense change and coming to terms with certain childhood events that were... not so fun.

Genre: Poetry

Word Count: 5953

Stage: Beta Reading (message me if ur interested)

The Mad ~ Mildred the Mad and her crew of dangerous and mythical women are charged with kidnapping and delivering the Seelie Prince to the Unseelie kingdom. But with every plan comes complications, some in the form of brooding king's guards.

Genre: Fantasy, Romance, Action

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Found Family

Current Word Count: 4434

Stage: ROUGH DRAFT and planning

P.S. My messages are open! Let's connect!

Published Works

The Hidden (w)Hole of a Heart ~ Literally my whole heart shat out onto paper. But seriously tho it's available on Amazon now and I would appreciate any support. In actuality, it's a story about a young woman (Yours Truly) coming to terms with her deeply feeling nature and Depression. The poems describe the heaviness of emptiness and the overwhelmingness of intense emotions.

Excerpts:

Haunted House

Feelings stick to my walls like ghosts,

How is an exorcism performed on a memory?

How do I let them pass through me?

An Apology to The Crone

Pressing my tiny fleshy palms to my ears,

I refused to hear the wisdom of the crone.

Her voice was scratchy with use,

As she warned me of my journey.

I’d close my eyes with every disaster.

The niggling feeling would whisper a wrong,

And I’d pray to God my feet were swift,

So, they could carry me away.

I’d refuse to harden,

Reasoning that beauty is only found in the soft.

I waited to be taken by my knight.

I never cared that the gleam in her armor was an illusion.

I stand unprepared for the cruel world.

Preserved in my maidenhood.

Having grown tired of disobedience, 

The crone has abandoned me.

Only now do I see the clarity of your wisdom,

I will forever be sorry.

A Terrible High

on occasion

there are quiet moments

where minds begin to fill blanks

when small things grow

rock to boulder

smashing me against the ground

flat

nothing 

2D

I’m nonexistent.

If I were nonexistent

the boulder would simply blow through

and I’d be nothing.

And I’d be okay.

[webslingingslasher]

what is ur first time high story ?

LMAO-

i didn't smoke weed until i graduated high school, so there i am w my certified stoner brother, and he's holding the pipe and the lighter, and he says, (cause i never really smoked at this point) 'i'm gonna light this and you gotta inhale,' and so, i do it.

so i hit the bowl twice and nothing, cause i'm expecting some dramatic 'oh shit! it hit!' moment. but on the third one i inhale, pull away and my brother says, 'breathe in through your nose' and lemme tell u what. i coughed my whole ass lung out, and he's nodding his head like, 'there you go. if ur not coughing ur not inhaling'

the SECOND i stopped coughing... holy shit.

i slumped in my seat, arms GLUED to the arm rests. it literally felt like my entire body was a sandbag.

i remember saying, 'you know how the world is contantly spinning on it's axsis? i can literally feel it right now.'

then, i couldn't stop laughing, and i saw a spider forming a web and was entranced like i was on acid.

then, i was hungry so i had my first ever munchy moment.

i ate:

an entire sleeve of kit-kats.

french onion dip.

and 8 slices of bacon. i was vegetarian at the time. my mom was so hesitant cause she was like, 'i don't want you to regret this' and i was like, 'no regret, please pork.'

also kept thinking i was falling asleep or had fallen asleep.

actually wasn't a huge fan and did it like 6-8 months after that and since then i've been a pot head woo.

OH AND THE COTTON MOUTH??? ON GOD IT STILL ATTACKS ME.

[xmystophalesx]

Best New Heavy Metal Releases Week of February 3rd, 2023

First time since I have been doing this that I had a week that was a bit of a slog. There was a LOT of decent to good albums, but very few that gave me that “oh shit” moment that I have come accustomed to. Even the albums that I have labeled as the “Best of the Week” I will be shocked if they end up on my end-of-year list. Not because they are bad, as I am sure there will be people out there that any number of albums from this week will end up in their personal top five for the year. They just didn’t hit for me in that way. I can certainly appreciate them for the hard work that was put into them, however. That being said, I don’t actually have a pick of the week for this week. That is usually reserved for the album I will try to buy on vinyl but this week there wasn’t one. There were a few highlights so I will talk briefly about them.

Xandria-The Wonders Still Awaiting (Symphonic Metal)**

This was the closest album to really catching my attention and possibly the pick of the week. This is some top tier Symphonic Metal with production that is absolutely perfect and really highlights everything that is going on here. Unfortunately, the album is simply too long. With a bit of editing, this album would have been an easy pick of the week.

The Winery Dogs-III (Hard Rock)**

With the talent level of the musicians in this band, there is no surprise that this is really well done. Billy Sheehan, Ritchie Kotzen and Mike Portnoy are all certified as some of the best musicians on the planet. I had reservations of putting this on the list, however, as this is Hard Rock at its heaviest moments and more in the realms of Blues at its lighter moments. In any case, this album is extremely well done and was a huge hit with my wife (not a metal head…lol).

Memoriam-Rise To Power (Death)**

Old school Death Metal is what Memoriam does and they do it exceedingly well. This album is more of the same and if you liked their other albums, you will certainly like this one as well. They have been incredibly consistent and given more listens, I could argue that this is the best of their career so far.

That will do it for this week. A week like this was bound to happen at some point. To be honest, I’m surprised it hasn’t happened sooner. But hey, at least now you know i’m not hyping stuff that I don’t actually believe in…lol Until next week, and as always,

BANG THY HEAD!!!

All worthy of a listen if you like the genre

*= standout in that genre

**=best of the week regardless of genre

Best of the Week

Xandria-The Wonders Still Awaiting (Symphonic Metal)**

Rexoria-Imperial Dawn (Melodic Heavy/Hard Rock)**

The Winery Dogs-III (Hard Rock)**

Godiva-Hubris (Melodic Death)**

Lumen Ad Mortem-Upon the Edge of Darkness (Black)**

Memoriam-Rise To Power (Death)**

Standouts in their Genre

Third Eye-Vengeance Fulfilled (Progressive)*

Mithridatum-Harrowing (Progressive Black)*

Viktor Smolski-Guitar Force (Heavy/Instrumental/Progressive)*

Skulldozer-Non Stop Ruthless Crushing (Death)*

Antigod-Messtery (Death/Thrash)*

Dreadrealm-Live From the Fall (Atmospheric Black)*

Holur-Foul Utterings (Black)*

Conspiracy of Zero-Ahthos Arouris (Progressive Death)*

Ob Nixilis-Abhorred (Melodic Desth/Black)*

Doomsday Outlaw-Damaged Goods (Hard Rock)*

Soulmass-Let Us Pray (Death/Doom)*

The Faith Hills Have Eyes-The Riffth Element (Thrash/Stoner/Progressive)*

Worth a listen if you enjoy the genre

Vahrzaw-In the Shadows of a Starlit Lake (Death/Black)

Destronomer-The Two Horns (Sludge/Doom)

Dread Witch-Tower of the Severed Serpent (Doom)

Hemisphaerium-Thagirion (Death)

Invicti-Songs of Conquest (Heavy/Hard Rock)

Ammanas-Solitude (Black)

Eternal Torment-Sins of the Damned (Death/Thrash)

Sadico Infesto-Paths of Inhumanity (Death)

Cronenberg-Grandiose Throne of Grotesque Flesh (Death)

Dysmal-Gates to Apperception (Melodic Death)

Heresie-Heresie (Black)

Falaise-After All This Time (Post Black/Atmospheric)

Pantheon-Empire in Ruin (Black/Death/Thrash)

[androgynousstrawberrystarfish]

20230130 and 20230131

Kiddo's been in a wraparound therapy program for a month. 3 month program. Covers anxiety, depression, substance use, gender identity. All stuff she needs. We started this because she has been skipping classes since October and told me it's because of anxiety. So we went to a psychiatrist for medication management at the direction of her HCP. Psychiatrist said she needs way more than he can provide and suggested a wraparound program. So she's been in one as soon as I found one that didn't tell me they have no room. Since last month she has told me on 8 different occasions that she wants help and wants to quit but will never commit to changing anything. Still hangs out with stoner friends. Still goes to their house. Still smokes at lunch time because it's "too hard". Two weeks ago she was caught with weed at school. She was not forced to take extra classes because she's in a wraparound program that covers substance abuse. Today she was caught high as fuck after lunch and started the delayed expulsion program. I got into her ass about all this and she has been giving me attitude and trying to act like she's in the right for continuing to smoke, tried gaslighting me until i shut that shit down, and told her I was pulling her ass out of school and starting ANYTHING else because anything is better than her getting expelled because her stupid ass won't make any fucking effort and she started screaming at me that she hates living here and pretending things are better during therapy and being forced to go do things with me and she hates me and I'll never be her dad and she just wants me to listen to her for once and let her live with her maternal grandmother. I felt like I was close to actually hitting her so I walked away and tried calming down. I've never even spanked her and I'm not about to start now. By the time I calmed down she had a bag packed and was trying to leave the house to live "anywhere but here", which apparently meant her 18 year old boyfriend's house

I was told they broke up when he found out she was 14 instead of 16. Apparently that was a fucking lie too.

So I took her phone her bag, told her to grab her shit, and we started driving

At that moment I realized I'm just fucking done. I can't do this anymore.

I'm spending close to 900/week on this therapy program and bought a cat and a laptop and I get "I hate you let me live anywhere else and I'll never stop trying to run away." And at this point I would rather pay child support and have a fucking social life again and go meet people and stop being so FUCKING ISOLATED because I have to be home 24/7 to watch a fucking monster teenager and I'm such a horrible person for even saying that and I can't help that it's true.

We drove to the airport, and I put them on the next flight direct to her maternal grandmother. I stayed awake all night until the plane took off so she was able to sleep and nobody would mess with her shit. At 6am she took off and I drove home, landing at about the same time I got to the house. Then I tried to sleep on and off while the kitten kept attacking me.

I sent certified insured and express mail with all the documents/medication she needs this afternoon and then got myself a very unhealthy dinner to try to cheer myself up. It didn't work. I'm still more angry than I've ever been in my life. I feel like a failure, a bad father, and a bad person. But I don't know what other option I had left.

Mood: 0/10

Day: 0/10

Overall Mood: I don't know. I have much to do to make sure this happens smoothly and legally and I don't end up missing anything. There' a lot to juggle.

[909hold]

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[thequibblah]

⭐️ would love some commentary on that dancing scene (or really any commentary on the various parties thrown by the marauders) from the party happening next to the Potions Club party ⭐️

WELL WELL WELL

"This is...a lot of trouble to go to." "It's the Marauders. They love trouble."

i love writing party scenes (as i'm sure you all know lol) and one of the best/worst things w the marauders parties is striking a balance between their, uh, audacious plans, and what's realistically possible at hogwarts without getting caught. (aka literally why i made up the dodgy lodgings). i went back and forth so long on whether or not they could plausibly have managed that with slughorn's dinner next door, but then was like ah whatever the party has to happen for plot reasons so.... plot ex machina??

anyway, i love using parties to establish character — what a brilliant stage of teenage performance they provide. i love contrasting the hogwarts parties to, say, evan wronecki's — for instance, how lily and co. are more at ease in the former, as seventh years, with their classmates hosting, than they were at evan's nye bash

i also love that it gives me space to establish who is and isn't popular, so to speak, but also who acts or doesn't act the way we presume popular kids will act

doe, for instance, who is by all accounts a level-headed and non-wild person, has a more exciting time on net at marauders' parties than mary (drinking game, kissing remus), though she's not a big drinker and isn't really into parties. but she's comfortable in her own little social circle at a bigger event (like with michael at evan's) and so isn't bothered at all by the marauders' do, because...

She did, in fact, trust the Marauders. Her general belief in the inherent goodness of people notwithstanding, she didn't think they would do anything to harm their friends. Intentionally.

this bit always makes me laugh

as with many things, i feel very saddened that i didn't get to make more out of the fools' olympics (although one could argue that The Dance was a pro) — as in, i wish i'd been able to squeeze more of it into the story itself. i could probably come up with a list of tasks and who completed them LOL

WAIT OH MY GOD I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THIS it just might be my favourite part of this chapter

"How did you do that?" Gillian said, glancing between the other two girls. "Just — drink it without a second thought?" "Practice," said Mary. "Scottish — constitution," David said hoarsely. "I once drank some of Mrs. Skower's All-Purpose Magical Mass Remover," said Priya.

priya is all i aspire to be

can i say, too, it's hilarious to me how many people worried niamh would be a james love interest? i feel like you will not rest easy on that count until he and lily are together... but that is not where the danger lies babes

circling back to popularity/unpopularity, another fun outlier. gillian is first established, in 33, as someone with friends (we see her around sara and in the seventh-year ravenclaws' compartment) but she's not exactly at ease at the party either — recall how she hesitates when mary invites her. only later, in 38, do we realise that our opinion of her has been skewed by the narration (from doe, who naturally assumes any friendly, nice person must have a wealth of friends and be floating through life; and mary, who naturally assumes anyone she isn't bored by must have the social skills of a medieval noblewoman at court), and she's a bit of a pariah in her own house

david, on the other hand, is just flat-out not in his element. and not because of the drinking or the, er, general revelry (see: summer with mary!), even though he doesn't partake much in either. unlike doe, the company breaks rather than makes his enjoyment — he's acutely aware, the whole time, that his cooler, more liked brother is around:

"Not your scene?" "What gave it away?" said David drily. As one they looked at Chris...

...and mary has intuited as much too, even though she has a lot more in common, superficially speaking, with chris than david

so, i think while i was writing this chapter i made a post complaining about how, as much as i love juggling the constraints of historical fiction, i hate that music from the 70s limits me in terms of tracklists. i.e., when i say a certain record is playing i can't just hit shuffle and go somewhere entirely different to set the mood shortly thereafter

this problem was because i wanted, NAY, NEEDED, to have "martha my dear" playing in the aftermath of that mary and david interaction. of course, time passes in that section break, but since "come and get it," which they talk about it, is a sirius song (though it could be a mary song), and i feel too strongly about needle drops to let that conversation go without a soundtrack. germaine even correctly guesses the white album is on because of mary:

Apparently Mary got fonder of the White Album the drunker she was.

...and of course the song itself makes me squeal with how very mary it is — not that it is something she would listen to, necessarily, or identify with (it would hold up too close of a mirror, ha), but it sounds like it could've been written about her ("hold your head up, you silly girl/look what you've done/when you find yourself in the thick of it/help yourself to a bit of what is all around you," which really sums up the entirety of her portree holiday, lol)

BUT! if "martha my dear" is to play here, then i have some Serious Chronology Concerns. i knew germeline had to kiss and jily had to dance and ideally in that order. but what would those scenes be soundtracked by!!!! i was limited to side two of the white album!!!

so i did the healthy thing and panic-listened to the white album. "don't pass me by" was, right away, an easy lock for the dance, because it's danceable, but not in a way that would've scared lily off. lyrically, it feels GREAT for jily in this moment, on the cusp of lily's realisation ("waiting for your knock, dear [...] i don't hear it, does it mean you don't love me anymore?" vs OF COURSE "don't pass me by [...] 'cause you know darling, i love only you"). i feel about "don't pass me by" the same way as NYT critic nik cohn: it's "straight ahead and clumsy and greatly enjoyable, backed by a beautiful hurdy-gurdy organ," which, if that isn't everything i wanted to evoke with the dance itself!!!!!!

ok we'll circle back to this, but onward with the musical discussion

thus i had four songs to choose from, between "martha my dear" and "don't pass me by," for the germeline scene — "piggies," "blackbird," "i'm so tired," and "rocky raccoon." the latter is on my sirius playlist, so auto-no; "piggies" is, well, like that, so also a no. "blackbird" is a certified germaine classic that was written personally by paul mccartney for germaine, but it seemed too introspective for the moment. i don't think i'd ever listened to "i'm so tired" before this panicked searching, and honestly it must be some wild luck that it is. just SO RIGHT!!!! it's so lethargic and tortured and angsty and, well, a bit of a stoner song, so.... it's THERE

AND NOW for the dance! true story, i initially wanted jily to have a real conversation, after the party. i had the dance in there and then james would catch up with lily after to be like, "hey i was wrong actually, you should write to petunia." but then i realised i wanted james and sirius to have a conversation about the bike/money, and i wanted it to strike a different chord, tonally, than the jily conversation. then i realised it would be too much to have both and i'd need to condense that conversation into the dance. VERY nearly cut the dance in favour of the conversation but wow i am glad i didn't

The tinkling piano signalled the start of the next song; she extended a hand, very matter-of-factly, to James, "Come on, this is a good one."

not pictured: james having a fucking breakdown

obviously, i could have gone the route of a genuine dramatic dance, but as previously mentioned lily would have chickened out, and i wanted to have this be an experience she could look back on and pine about because of how fun it was and james totally doesn't like her back

Loath as she was to admit it, this most indelicate of waltzes suited the plodding chords of "Don't Pass Me By." And worst of all, once they had stopped stepping on each other's feet James started to sing, in the poorest possible Ringo imitation she had ever heard in her life.

by the way, attentive readers of blink three times will recall:

He finally starts to lead — thank goodness, because she’s not the one who was forced into formal dance lessons as a child...

so in 36, this is james being drunk, but it is also james being silly on purpose because not only is he JAMES and so he must take the mick, he also knows it will put lily at ease

okay, and this bit:

"Don't pass me by, don't make me cry, don't make me blue," they both shouted rather than sang, "'Cause you know darling—" Lily broke off, laughing, dimly aware that she had done so to avoid saying I love only you while staring right at him.

from the FIRST MOMENT i picked out "don't pass me by," i knew i knew I KNEW that lily would have thoughts about this line. at this point in the story if someone questioned her about it she would probably have a full-scale breakdown about her male friends vs her female friends ("but no... i suppose i wouldn't mind saying it to remus.... but that's different!" how is it different, lily? "it's different!")

anyway, the bottom line is she could NOT abide saying it. i enjoyed writing that because 1. same girl and 2. it felt like a nice bit of close foreshadowing for her realisation, which i knew was coming soon. so that's a really circular way of saying, i knew what it meant but ideally to readers it was just oh this will mean something far-off in the future!!! which is usually true for me but SURPRISE babey it was just two chapters away!!!

note btw that lily "falls for james"

Lily spun faster than she’d intended to. The room was a brief, kaleidoscope blur. Then there was James. “Jesus, Evans,” he said, steadying her as the next track began.

>:)

and after i thought tracklists would fuck me up, i turned them into my WEAPON!!

Huffing, she stepped out of his arms. (There were some songs you could sing along to with your mates, and “Why Don’t We Do It In The Road?” was not one of them.)

(so, you know, keep in mind that for the rest of this conversation, paul is in the background howling "no one will be watching us/why don't we do it in the road?")

also:

"...I’m not drinking tonight, but I’d better get the royal treatment after we win on Saturday."

and then what happened <3

wait jesus oh my god i really went hard on this huh

She only saw its result: the easy grin had given way to an expression so serious it was almost sweet.

LILY??????

and hey, remember when:

...because in chapter 26:

Dex’s measured opinions about the wizarding world seemed more the result of upbringing and inexperience than ill will, but Lily had not expected a radical change of heart.

...but then in 36:

He was right, damn it. And a part of her had known all along, had sought him out expressly so that he would say the opposite thing to her. He’d gone and proven her wrong. She broke the staring match first [...] “What brought on the change of heart?” “It’s a long story, and I expect it’ll have an unsatisfying end if I told it to you.” Lily scoffed, but James had on that maddening grin that meant he would not budge. “Oh, all right.” Softer, she added, “Thank you.” He began to back away, towards the bar. “It’s give and take, Evans.”

in conclusion, i never forget, besties

[dissonantdreamer]

my straight friend said that ellie and dina only make out in the weed den scene and not do the "do". What are your thoughts about this dissonant? I wanna prove her wrong.

If you’re friend doesn’t want to think they went past making out that’s her prerogative and trying to prove to someone who doesn’t want to see it your way is exhausting.

I’ve answered before that it’s pretty obvious there is more than enough tension in the scene to conclude they got it on. We’re shown them making out. The scene cuts away because that part is not for us, it’s their first time compared to Abby and Owen’s last time. We the viewers don’t need to see what happens we’ve been given more than enough context clues, and when we rejoin them after the cutaway we have two people being emotionally intimate and raw with each other. They’re cuddling in their unmentionables, they have a glow about them.  They open up to each other and feel safe enough to playfully mess around. They are lighter. All indicators something important happened between them and that is to say, in the biggest Abby, mocking the Seraphites at the martyr gate tone possible, they got laaaaiiid.

As far as “proof”, I remember in interviews I noticed this scene, as well as Abby’s isn’t talked about as much and that might have to do with the fact that some folks are fucking awful and can’t be mature and the team doesn’t want to bring that hate into the interviewer’s space (there was a lot of hate bombing interview comment sections) they seemed to mention sex scenes, iirc, so do with that what ya will. One interview  I saw in the LATimes Neil, when talking about Halley Gross as a collaborator said, “[...] the intimate stuff, especially between Ellie and Dina would have been difficult without Gross.”or something close to that.

I’m sure there are plenty of other interviews that could point you towards “proof”, but I don’t have the time to scrub through them all. No one does.

In the end, it’s not your job to “prove” anything, you don’t owe it to your friend or anyone for that matter.  If you feel like they did the do, then that is your take away and nobody can say otherwise. I don’t think Abby and Owen’s scene was healthy representation of an intimate moment, but some people do. I can’t convince them I’m right or wrong when the whole game is predicated on the fact it can, will, and did make people feel a whole spectrum of feelings. With wildly varying takeaways. Some good, some bad, and some “holy fuck ,my dudes please talk to a therapist you’re threatening to kill a child on the internet.”

The moment itself is big and a lot is left to the viewer to piece together, and remember, you are backed by the literal everyone else in this fandom, that go feral at the very mention of the name DINA, that something special occurred between them that wasn’t just making out.

Let’s be real, I’m a certifiable idiot with a tumblr page. I make wild claims with half scraped together bits of details like a stoner at a party goes through the roaches in the ashtrays to get enough weed to pack half a bowl, I don’t expect to ever change anyone’s mind with what I cobble together and that’s fine. Not everyone sees what I see. Not everyone wants to. That’s on them.

BUT if I were going to deliver some fucking proof in this joint as a final toss up, my Hail Mary sports reference, I would very much like to point out that Dina did try to bring some levity to her pregnancy reveal by making the joke “Don’t worry it’s not yours.” Which I highly  doubt is something you would say to someone you never got it on with.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Boom, mic drop, walk away from the open flames that I have turned this answer into.

Thanks for the ask anon, hope I actually answered it.  :)

[jerseycityrp-blog]

FULL NAME: Conor James Hudson GENDER: Chris Wood  PRONOUNS: He/Him AGE: 28 BIRTHDAY: June 18th BIRTH ORDER: First HOMETOWN: Jersey City, New Jersey RELATION: Full Sibling TYPE: Solo ORIENTATION: Heterosexual/Heteroromantic JOB TITLE(S): Firefighter with a NYFD ladder company FACECLAIM: Chris Wood

TW: brief mentions of violence, depression.  

Conor was always an agree able kid.  He was a bit on the quiet side just living to make his mama proud.  He didn’t really like sports and made average grades at best, but at a young age he fell in love with music.  The louder the better!

In high school Conor tried to fly under the radar, but he had a tight knit group of friends.  It was the stereotypical stoner crowd, but Conor never partook, he had goals of joining the army and didn’t want anything to come in his way.  The group however did form a band, and they played their loud punk music all across the county.  They even all had fake IDS made so they could play in all the 21 and over clubs across in the tunnel in NYC.  Conor didn’t see the harm in it, he wasn’t using his ID to get drunk just play music.  However, that choice would soon be his downfall.  One of his rowdier bandmates was getting into a scuffle with one of the patrons outside of the club, and Conor took it upon himself to diffuse the situation.  When he went to pull his friend out of the confrontation he stepped in at the wrong moment and a bottle was smashed over his head.  He awoke in the hospital later and would learn his hearing was permanently impaired in his left ear.

When he learned that his goals and becoming a military man were dashed he withdrew from life.  He was frustrated by the fact people had to speak louder or on his right side, music sounded different, and his future seemed pointless.  Conor graduated but just barely, still his mom was happy to seem him pull it together.  

Conor got a new lease on life when his family surprised him with a hearing aid for his impaired ear.  For the longest time it wasn’t covered by their insurance, and while it wasn’t the answer to all his problems, his world didn’t seem so small anymore.  Instead of enlisting Conor decided to start the process of becoming a fire fighter.  As long as he could pass his physical the academy wouldn’t hold his disability against him and that was just the kind of environment Conor found himself thriving in.  He became a certified EMT, and worked with a local fire station before joining the fire academy. 

Once he graduated from the fire academy Conor got a job with a NYFD engine company where he job was to secure water lines and extinguish fires.  Eventually he worked his way up and now he’s working with a ladder company where his main priority is search and rescue and ventilation.  His partner and chief have taken to lovingly calling him radar since his sense of direction more than makes up for him being hard of hearing.

[rinki51]

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[youngandhungryent]

Wiz Khalifa’s Mixtapes, Ranked

With 18 tapes and counting, Wiz Khalifa has one of the most impressive mixtape arsenals in the game. After dropping his breakthrough mixtape Kush and Orange Juice in 2010, the Pittsburgh bred emcee has since certified himself as hip-hop’s undisputed king of stoner anthems. Wiz’s run in the first half of the decade was stellar-- at one point or another, we were all saying “Taylor Gang or die,” and his commercial success among non-smokers and smokers alike easily turned him into one of the most recognizable figures in hip hop. 

Born Cameron Jabril Thomaz, the rapper is an eminent advocate for all things bud-related, and his music has become a staple for regular cannabis smokers all around. Never one to be shy about his love for the green, Wiz himself has said that the flower helped him get through high school by making it more tolerable. A sentiment many fans of the pro-cannabis rapper can likely agree with, Wiz’s early, chilled-out, smoke-centered tapes bring a feeling of nostalgia these days for many of his early listeners.     

For your convenience, we’ve ranked all 18 of Wiz’s mixtapes from worst to best. Light one up and enjoy!   

Where did your favorite Wiz project rank? Let us know in the comments!  

Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images

18. Bong Rips (2017)

One of Wiz’s newer tapes, Bong Rips is a four-track EP that offers fans a fresh listening experience from the rapper. A quick listen, the tape is a solid collection of catchy hooks with trap drums mixed in with more classic sounding Wiz beats. The result is an exploration of the Pittsburg emcee experimenting with new sounds while attempting to maintain his Wiz-appeal. Frequent collaborator and Taylor Gang affiliate Chevy Woods assists Wiz on the tape’s strongest moments. 

Wiz Khalifa · Steam Room ft. Chevy Woods (Produced by Girl Talk)

17. Laugh Now, Fly Later (2017)

Intended to keep fans satisfied until the release of Rolling Papers 2, the project is a solid, relatively misstep free effort from the hitmaker. While there is nothing that makes the tape particularly sour, the lack of cameos and compelling hooks--aside from Casey Veggies on “Royal Highness,” does nothing to establish the tape as an extraordinary project in Wiz’s arsenal.    

Wiz Khalifa · Laugh Now, Fly Later

16. Fly Times, Vol.1: The Good Fly Young (2019)

Dropped on 4/20 last year, Wiz released the vibey 14-track tape as a gift to fans for the cannabis holiday. Sticking to the fool-proof formula, Fly Times returns back to that chilled-out funk Khalifa had strayed from in previous work while also incorporating a throwback R&B sound. Flooded with guest hooks, a standout from the tape comes from “Taylor,” a collab with Cardo named after their star-studded collective. The former Taylor Gang producer is also responsible for Wiz’s memorable Kush & OJ tracks, “Mezmerized” and “In the Cut.”

Wiz Khalifa · Fly Times Vol. 1: The Good Fly Young

15. Pre-Rolleds (2017)

Released in summer 2017 just a few weeks before Bong Rips, the surprise four-track tape is a small but mighty promotional teaser for the album. Produced by Taylor Gang member Sledgren, the EP is cited by many fans as a significant improvement from Laugh Now, Fly Later, which arrived earlier in the year. Two songs in particular, “Doubtfire” and “Water Damage,” carry the EP and offer a look at an experimental Wiz utilizing more trap-infused beats and influence from Soundcloud rap.  

Wiz Khalifa · Pre-Rolleds

14. Grow Season (2007)

Wiz Khalifa was just 16 years old when he recorded Grow Season. While the sound here is nothing like the established Wiz we’ve come to know and love, it still offers an interesting look at the early formulation of Wiz as an artist. Elements of Wiz’s current sound can be heard on standout tracks like “Talk To Me,” “Grow,” and “Lifted.” Nonetheless, it’s pretty clear the Pittsburg rapper had not yet fully grown into his artistry.

13. 3 Doobies (2020)

His most recent tape, this three-track project demonstrates that Wiz still has it, tapping back into the chilled-out sound that launched him into the limelight. The Sledgren produced- “See Those” features a trance-like beat perfect for relaxing and smoking to, while “Drink Poured Up” sounds like an unreleased Kush & OJ demo track.      

12. Prince of the City: Welcome to Pistolvania (2005)

A true personification of Pittsburgh, Wiz’s fiery first mixtape established him as an artist to watch by various music publications. A project best experienced when listened from start to finish, highlights from the 19-song tracklist include “Oh No” and “Bars.” The tape can also be credited with helping the young emcee score a recording deal with Warner Bros. Records in 2007 ahead of the release of the project’s follow up Prince of the City 2. 

11. Cabin Fever 3(2015)

The latest installment in his Cabin Fever series and Wiz’s thirteenth tape overall, the third Cabin Fever continues the already established glory of the previous ones. While the project incorporates compulsory vibey stoner jams like “Call Again”, the tape’s charm actually comes from the more gaudy trap-infused songs like “Respect” with Juicy J and K CAMP, and “Gangster 101” with King Los. Wiz mainly worked with Atlanta-based producers on the project, influencing the trap-inspired sound across the tape.     

10. Star Power (2008)

Christopher Polk/Getty Images

Released 12 years ago, Star Power is the iconic tape that gave us some of Wiz’s most classic moments. In addition to the memorable cuts “Ink My Whole Body” and “Flick’ Ashes,” the project also features a number of songs with non-THC laden bars. Courtney Noelle’s assistance on the hook of “Bankroll” established the song as one of the tape’s most defining and distinct moments. It’s worth noting that with 26 songs total, some points of the project do not standout enough to rank it above some of Wiz’s other work. 

9. 28 Grams (2014)

Accurately titled 28 Grams, the 28-track release marked Wiz’s twelfth mixtape. Once again showcasing the rapper incorporating more trap and Soundcloud inspired sounds in full-fledged “Trap Wiz” mode, the stoner-rap tape has very few weak spots. Long time fans of Wiz were rattled by the heavy trap beats and autotune present throughout the tape and some viewed the project as the rapper selling out. Despite the slight change in musical direction, the tape is still one of Khalifa’s strongest efforts to date. 

While cuts like “Maan,” “What Iss Hittin,” and “Word On The Town” can make anyone feel like a winner, cuts like “Pure” and “Samo” are woozier songs that call for relaxation--with a blunt, of course. 

Wiz Khalifa · 28 Grams

8. Prince of the City 2 (2007)

The follow up to his debut mixtape, Prince of the City 2 continues to showcase that raw Pittsburg sound Wiz curated since his debut. One of the few projects in the rapper’s catalog that can be classified as having a true East Coast sound, you can hear the hunger in Wiz's bars as he comes in swinging on this street tape. Largely a solo endeavor, the gritty tape has very few dull moments, with each track delivering a compelling message from the rapper. 

On the Sledgren produced track “Buss Down,” young Wiz is at his most confident on the project. “Talk To Ya” with Taylor Gang’s Chevy Woods, which samples Usher’s 2004 song “Superstar,” is perhaps one of its kind in Wiz’s discography. You can hear the clear Cam’ron influence on both tracks, an artist Khalifa has cited as one of his favorite. Other key moments on the project include “Gone” and “Poppin’ Rubberbands.”    

7. Cabin Fever 2 (2012)

If you’ve noticed with each Cabin Fever installment, Wiz explores a new sound. Whereas the third installment saw Wiz working with Atlanta producers and incorporating more trap beats, the second installment taps into more of a Bay Area sound-- on “MIA” he literally says, “I’m from Pittsburg, but I be in the Bay.”  Don’t expect Wiz to deliver any impressive bars on this one--the project is very much party music. Still, the rapper’s compelling melodies and niche topics make the tape one of his best.   

Best enjoyed after sparking up, the tape’s groovy sounds are easy to float through. Mentioned briefly, the Juicy J assisted cut “MIA” is one of the tape’s heavy-hitters and is one of the sole Pittsburgh moments on the project. Cuts like “Bout Me,” “Stu,” and “100 Bottles” really tap into that bouncy, West Coast production that heavily influenced this tape, and further solidifies Wiz's skill in effectively incorporating new sounds.  

6. Flight School (2009)

Another tape in Wiz’s discography that can be hailed iconic, Flight School was released during Wiz’s golden era. A project many fans associate with his “original sound,” the tape also shows the origin of Wiz’s experimentalism; a number of cuts tap into the techno-fusion realm like “Get Sum” and “Teach You To Fly.” Throughout all fourteen tracks, Wiz manages to deliver an attention-grabbing performance on the mainly solo endeavor.    

The entire mixtape is spectacularly cohesive-- it starts off on an introductory high with “Boarding Pass,” and never dips through its runtime. Pinnacles from the project include “Dreamer,” where Wiz’s laid back bars blend perfectly with the song’s stripped production, and “I’m Good,” where the young rapper delivers some of his best, most self-assured, cocky bars to date. “Never Ever” is a tale of victory and features some of the best lyrical moments on the tape. “Hollywood Hoes” serves as one of the rapper’s most unique musical moments. The orchestral production paired with his woozy bars is an undeniable match, the only flaw being its 2-minute runtime.  

5. How Fly (with Curren$y) (2009)

A match made in stoner-heaven, Wiz Khalifa and Curren$y’s collaboration on 2009’s weed-themed How Fly is an unforgettable moment in recent hip-hop history. Simply put, they bodied this. From the moment Wiz demands, “Clear the runway, baby,” on the opening track, it’s hard to not feel drawn in by the mixtape. The modern kings of melodic stoner music, the pair exchange vibey-bars over relaxed beats from start to finish with no complete misses or boring moments in sight.  

Bonding over their love for the green throughout the project, the pair do some story-telling on the intro track “Car Service.” The production alone on the next track, “All Over,” is enough to pull in any listener, while Curren$y and Wiz easily float over the bouncy beat. Other peaks on How Fly include “The Planes,” “Friendly,” and the unforgettable “Rollin’ Up.”  

4. Cabin Fever (2011)

The first of the series, the original Cabin Fever remains unrivaled as the best mixtape in the bunch and one of the best in Wiz’s entire mixtape discography. Released in the era of rap where the lines of mixtapes and albums still blurred, the project has gone on to be certified Diamond on Datpiff with over 1.5 million downloads. It deserves all the acclaim, of course. The 9-track tape is packed with high-energy, catchy cuts reminiscent of the Pittsburgh sound that helped launch Wiz’s career. 

Every single track on Cabin Fever is stellar. “Phone Numbers” and “GangBang,” both featuring Detroit-raised rapper Big Sean are highpoints on the project, once again highlighting the rapper’s strength in dipping his feet in new sounds while maintaining elements of his classic sound. “Taylor Gang” is another essential moment on the project with a hook you will never get out of your head. Overall, the tape is short but sweet, and a critical piece in Wiz’s discography.   

3. Taylor Allderdice (2012)

Named after the high school Wiz attended, Taylor Allderdice deserves a spot in the top 3. For starters, the tape demonstrated Wiz tapping back into his first love: marijuana. Following the mixed reviews of the pop-rap sound on his major-label project Rolling Papers back in 2011, Wiz returned to his classic, THC-influenced sounds and themes on this follow-up mixtape. Quickly becoming a fan favorite and cited as one of the best projects released in 2012, it was like Wiz had something to prove with Taylor Allderdice. 

Fully stocked with an array of infectious beats and melodic bars from Khalifa, it is easy to understand why the tape is so adored. Wiz teams up with Cardo and Sledgren for tracks like “California,” “Mary 3x,” and “O.N.I.F.C,” which give the tape that distinct Wiz-sound and resulted in fan-favorites. The project is an incredibly smooth reminder from Wiz that he’s still got it, major label or otherwise.

2. Burn After Rolling (2009)

A concept project based on the film Burn After Reading, Wiz’s seventh mixtape Burn After Rolling is full of personality and truly one of its kind in his catalog. The tape flaunts Wiz’s lyrical abilities as well as demonstrating his impressive ear for a good beat. BAR rightly earns its spot in the second place slot, as a piece of work that is undeniable for any day-one Wiz fan, and equally, a project that maintains musical value to this day.

The tape’s highest points come from the engaging title track that introduces the album “B.A.R,” and “The Thrill,” which is the literal embodiment of nostalgia in a song. The down-tempo “Take Yo Bitch” is Wiz at his most suave, with sultry bars over a silky beat. “When U Find” features melodic rhymes from Wiz over a hazy-beat and samples the 2004 R&B song “You Can’t Blame Me.” 

1. Kush & Orange Juice (2010)

Young And Hungry Ent.

source https://youngandhungryent.blogspot.com/2020/08/wiz-khalifas-mixtapes-ranked.html

[austinpanda]

Getting a Maine Card

Upon visiting CheapMedCardsME.com, I paid $60, sent a copy of my driver’s license, and scheduled what was described as “10 minutes with a certified nurse practitioner,” for 1:10 this afternoon. I would hear from Suzanne. I waited for the call with the phone in my hand. 

When my phone went off, five minutes early, it looked like my instant messaging app, not a phone call. So I had to look at the phone and read words. It said something about Suzanne wishing to initiate a video conference. My first thought was, “Wow, it’s the future!” My second thought was, “Oh fuck meeee, wasn’t expecting this!” My third thought was, “Well! Isn’t that clever of them? This way they make sure I’m not a 12 year old in the middle of fifth period social studies.” My fourth thought was, “Well, I can’t just hang up out of fear, dammit. I just have to act like a normal person. I can do this. Aaaaand, go!” I hit the big button my phone was displaying, not caring two pins what the button actually said.

As this was happening, I was hastening from the living room to the back bedroom for quiet, and privacy, and a suitable backdrop for my end of the video conference. Looming large in my thoughts was, “My eyes are pink as fuck.” When I got to the bedroom, I realized (a) The walls were covered with rainbows from all those crystals Zach got me for Christmas, and (b) If we face my side of the room, a bong would be in view, and (c) If we face Zach’s side of the room, I swear by gawd and sunny jebus, there’s a Bob Marley album cover on the wall, so I ran to the kitty’s room/the spare bedroom. 

It quickly became apparent that I needed to install an app to make the video conference work, but the phone kindly offered to install the appropriate app right away, so I said, “Go!” I knew Suzanne was waiting, and had faith that she would stick with it until the call dropped. Then my phone downloaded and installed the app, and asked for permission to shoot sound and video. So I said, “Yes!” And finally I was presented with a button to start the video conference. 

The woman on the other end, Suzanne, appeared. The top half of my face and a lot of white wall behind me appeared in a small window. (Over the course of the call, I realized I was aiming my camera at the top of my head, and I angled it downward to my face was roughly centered in the wee frame.)

There were questions, beginning with the oldest question of my life.

She asked, “So...is it Wide-Man? Or Weed-Man?” 

I said, “It’s Wide-Man.”

I verified my full address and my date of birth. She asked for what medical condition I’m requesting the Maine Card. Moment of truth. The state of Maine has tasked Suzanne with determining whether I suffer legitimate medical conditions that could be treated with cannabis, or if I’m simply a stoner, who wishes to smoke only for pleasure, only because he wants to, who will then hop into a school bus and drive all the orphans into a frozen lake because of his deviant, repulsive fondness for reefer.

The website, CheapMedCardsME.com, has an FAQ that includes the following information, which isn’t verbatim. Question: What medical conditions qualify one for a medical cannabis card? Answer: The State of Maine has removed its list of qualifying conditions, so...whatever condition you want! Assuming the nurse practitioner sees a potential benefit, and it isn’t just because of how much you like Funyuns and high-def nature documentaries. Therefore I was prepared for this question. What else would they want to ask? If I want the state to allow me to buy weed, for medical reasons, at some point, someone is going to ask me what medical problem it’s for, and write it down, and put it in The Computer. Now the State of Maine knows I like pot. Oh well. Maine appreciates the cash flow, I’m certain.

I don’t lie. I try not to ever lie. I tell her I’ve had problems with anxiety and depression, and cannabis helps, which is true. I told her my feet are flat, my ankles don’t work, and I’m in pain every day, which is true. I told her I sometimes have problems sleeping, and cannabis helps with all of that. She has follow-up questions.

Her: For the anxiety and depression, have you tried any therapy or counseling?

Me: No, I take pills!

Her: Which ones?

Me: Happy pills number 3 and number 12!

Her: And for the foot and ankle pain, do you do any physical therapy? 

Me: No, I went to an orthopedic surgeon, who charged me $500, then got an MRI done, which cost me $500, then I ran out of money.

Her: And for the sleeping, do you take any over the counter medications for that?

Me: As it happens, Happy pill number 12 has the side effect of helping that a little bit.

Her: Okay, I’m gonna give you a Maine Card. You’ll get a copy of it in your email, that’ll be within 24 hours. Most dispensaries will allow the temporary card, but not all of them do. You should receive the permanent card within a week. Didja have any questions?

Me: I had to agree to ‘be responsible for a 6 month follow-up’ of some kind?

Her: [making swiping motions in front of her with her hand, as though shooing away a bug] Oh, I don’t require that. When your card expires, we can just see you then. [swipe, swipe]

Me: Okay, thank you very much! I had no other questions, and I really appreciate your help!

Her: [swipe swipe swipe] You’re welcome, and have a great rest of your day.

--

That was about the most surreal thing that’s happened to me since moving to Maine. The call was complete by about 1:15 PM. By 3:54 PM, the temporary card arrived in my inbox. Suzanne is efficient! Found a place in Bangor called Timberland Herbal Connections which was okay with a temporary card, as long as I provided my driver’s license too. Met with budtender Jason. Got myself eight pre-rolls. The first one I tried was called Fruity Pebbles. Life is good.

[thesunlounge]

Reviews 285: CZW and Neo Image

Mood Hut devotees have always wondered about a curious hole in the label’s discography, for in 2014, the Vancouver crew moved from House of Door’s The Dolphin Hotel Affair Vol. 1 (MH005) to Jack J’s Looking Forward to You single (MH007), thus mysteriously skipping over MH006. An errant comment made on the Mood Hut Discogs page back in 2016 suggested that the release was indeed coming, but other than that, it has remained a giant question mark and with each passing year, seemed less and less likely to ever drop. Parallel to this, there was an unreleased yet certified Mood Hut classic floating around the internet…a zoner hip hop and haze house anthem that leaked via misplaced CD-Rs, circulated widely, and even made its way onto a Jayda G Boiler Room set. And given the amazing strength of the track, it was always hard to imagine how or why it never made its way to vinyl. Luckily in 2019, we’ve arrived at a convergence and now, the mysteries of MH006 and the hip hop house banger have finally been solved by the Just Off Wave / Open Mic Beat 12″.

The architects of “Just Off Wave” are Mood Hut mainstays C.Z. Wang and Neo Image, who years ago crafted a slice of buoyant club magic…minimal yet suffused with pop energy and cosmic ethereality, as pads waver and electro lasers fire above airy house beatscapes. Then pushing the song towards total earworm perfection are the sleepy-eyed raps, all stoner voices pitch-shifting and smooth lyricisms stoking peak-time party ecstasy, with everything flowing from Separated at Birth (a well known Canadian hip hop duo operating here under an alias). It’s truly remarkable, especially given that it was written over five years ago, and shows that even in their earliest days, the Mood Hut crew were swinging wide and soaring to impossible heights. And though “Just Off Wave” is itself worth the admission price, of course that’s not all, for there’s also “Open Mic Beat”….a freaky drum machine improv that, according to the label, "got its legs at early Mood Hut parties where it became a natural prompt, encouraging microphone-grabbing party guests to step up and freestyle.”

CZW and Neo Image - Just Off Wave / Open Mic Beat (Mood Hut, 2019) “Just Off Wave” comes to life on double time clicks, splashing rides, analog snares, and bouncy four-four kicks until time-morphing delay spirals wash the rhythms away, leaving angelic pads to sigh while sub-bass bubbles float the soul. A syrupy, stoned, and temporally slowed voice repeats “just off wave / just on wave” as the rhythms rush back in, now carried by jacking house bass and melodic tom-tom percolations. At some point, a synthesized diva screams from the void, sending shivers up the spine while Kraftwerk-ian electro lasers add touches of electro-magic to the hip house glide. As the beats drop away once again, a feminine voice begins her calming raps…all lyrical, heavy lidded, and flowing smoothly on echowaves. And once the beat drops back in, it’s all so heady and intoxicating, taking me back to 90s radio jams from TLC, Salt-N-Pepa, and Missy Elliot as I sing along: “wasn’t a party / more like a parade / we’re out here riding / I’m heavy and I’m paid” (that’s my best guess at least). Perhaps no better party starter has ever been written, with effervescent house rhythms riding hypnotically and the ethereal pads bathing the mix in layers of haunted sorrow as everyone jumps together, hands in the air, singing along to a zoned out west coast anthem. The rest of the track sees the two Separated at Birth members locked into a hypnotic call and response, with dopamine title chants alternating with laid back lyrical spells, and at some point even the feminine voice backs into delirious repetitions of “just on wave”. The virtual diva scream returns and breaks the mix down one last time, with the low down masculine voice now running through zany delay trails while surrounded by cloudform pads. And after one more turn of the spellbinding rap hypnotics, we end on a stretch of club heavy rhythmics.

Earth moving bass pulsations underly frenetic phaser hats and grooving snares in “Open Mic Beat,” with rimshots rocketing out of control and galactic oscillations spinning towards the stars. Roland cowbells fire in counterpoint as the rhythms pull in and out and house pads suck the air out of the mix, with everything chained to psychosonic drum sorcery and wigged out beat science. Kick drums are swathed in clouds of sub-bass sensuality and each hit causes the soul to vibrate at universal frequencies until zooming echo fx and feedback modulations wash it all away, setting up a moment of anticipation before the jaw-dropping rhythms return, now with deep house chords melting down from the sky. At certain moments, the mix reduces to soft cymbal tapping and clicking bass drums while ethereal melodies and LSD tracers zoom in and out of the stereo field. But we always return to the overwhelming beat cascades, all cracking claps backgrounding cymbals, snares, and rimshots as they dance through delirium patterns. Cowbells tickle the mind amidst extended stretches of abstract rhythmic militance, with the only transitions coming from heady cymbal switch-ups. Towards the end, the drums dispersing for another extended stretch of beatless ambiance wherein house pads sound sickly and weak while surrounding chaotic rimshot patterns. For a moment, it feels as if everything is about to vaporize and fade away, but eventually, the rhythmic psychedelia returns for one last section of hallucinogenic body magic. And each time I listen, my mind goes wild trying to imagine anyone freestyling to such a wigged out piece of machine drum sorcery…surely the kind of thing only attempted by the most courageous or faded amongst the Mood Hut partiers.

(images from my personal copy)