#ch: perma

[hwaightme]

Family for Hire (Ch.4)

(family for hire ml) (join series and/or permanent taglist!)

☀️ pairing: single dad!seonghwa x business woman!reader ☀️ genre: fluff, romance, family, domestic, fake marriage, slice of life ☀️ ch. summary: settling into a new routine came with its challenges, of course, but you expected that. what you did not expect, however, was for seonghwa to completely derail your plans for quietude. ☀️ ch. wordcount: 4.7k ☀️ ch. warnings/tags: language, questionably edited, hwa being one jealous boy, a ton of coffee, implied missing breakfast, food/eating, a wild woo and yeo appear, rash decisions, implied lack of sleep, let me know if anything else! ☀️ perma-taglist: @doom-fics @legohwas @acciocriativity @justhere4kpop @honey-lemon-goose @byuntrash101 @shakalakaboomboo @starillusion13 @hongthoven @cqndiedcherries @uwuheeseungie @hoshischeekss @frankenstein852 @charreddonuts @miriamxsworld @mingigoo @michel-angelhoe (can't be tagged: @ate-ez) ☀️ a/n: in anticipation of seonghwa day, hope you enjoy some more single dad hwa~ much love, any reblogs, comments, thoughts, feelings appreciated! apologies if the chapter is chaos, but hey... croissants and coffee!

Chapter 4: When Croissants Fly

Had you known that if you were to make it into the office on time and keep your promise of taking a certain kid to kindergarten, you would have to get up at hell o’clock in the morning – with hell being anything before six, you would have, respectfully, just left the conversation with standard goodbyes and not offered something out of the blue. Nothing could prepare you for the sheer amount of noise that a child could produce that early, when you were used to having an apartment to yourself, a nice, steaming, hot cup of coffee, and the human right to have fifteen minutes of sheer panic as you would realise if you did not hurry up you would be late. But even that panic was independent. You were not holding anyone up, no one was holding you up. You did not have to answer to anyone, nor did you have to be sitting there, in the driver’s seat, praying for a certain someone to ‘just… chill… out…”. Even though it had already been a three, now four days of you driving back and forth, back and forth like an expensive school bus, you still had a lot to get used to.

You glanced back as you stopped at a red light, catching Nari in deep conversation with her father about some drawing homework – something you were suddenly very jealous of. Why couldn’t adults have drawing homework instead of taxes? But nonetheless, no matter how simple the conversation was, each syllable was like a bass boosted hit of a dubstep remix in your cranium. Biting your lip, you attempted to focus on the sound of traffic outside and wondered if your fellow passengers would quieten down if you were to turn on the radio. You caught yourself hovering between being glad to be on better terms with Seonghwa and mini-Co, and wanting to let out an elaborate string of curses that had accumulated since your coffee machine broke this morning, and you, being a silly optimist when it came to appliances, had no alternative of source of energy fuel. This discomfort was apparently obvious enough for Seonghwa to pick up on it, and at the next red light you hear him tell his daughter to wait a second, and call out to you:

“Y/N, are you okay?” the note of concern in his voice made your heart ache and guilt for being so inwardly irritated spread through you. Peering out at the concrete jungle, you tapped the arm rest a couple of times, pondering the question before asking one back.

“What, do I look unequivocally dubious?” you tried to remain as neutral as possible, since Nari did not need to know what passive aggressive behaviour was, so early in her childhood, however Seonghwa was too finely attuned to emotional landscapes for your own good. Perhaps he could even give Yunho a run for his hard-earned ‘through thick and thin’ friend money.

“Oh, no! Not at all, it’s just that, um, I mean, this routine is quite new and must be very troublesome, so-”

“Do I look tired, is that it?” you interrupted gently, Seonghwa’s obvious beating around the bush turning out to be rather amusing, alleviating some of the headache that the day had been providing you with so far. It was hard not to notice how his upper body stiffened as he stared back at you through the rear-view mirror. Deciding to not keep up the limbo of whether he offended you or not, you cracked the brightest smile you could muster, and winked, “I know I do, don’t worry. I am an early bird by caffeine, and the love of my life broke today.”

“The love… of your life?” Seonghwa repeated cautiously, acutely reactive to your particular choice of words. Choosing to not mention how he leaned closer to you, with even his daughter shooting him an inquisitive glance, you simply elaborated on your morning ordeal.

Amidst your dramatic recounting of your battle with the ‘coffee monster’ you had made Nari burst into a fit of giggles, which was a win in your unpaid parenting work experience, though judging by Seonghwa’s unchanging pained expression, something about the moral of the story seemed to not quite fit the unspoken fairy tale standard, and as such, you trailed off into an awkward silence.

“Did you have… breakfast, at least?”

“Sure?”

“Okay, then what was it?”

Somehow in that moment you felt as though you were not supposed to be sat in the driver's seat, and instead in a detention, or in a dim corner for a long timeout. One step away, and you could almost hear Seonghwa saying ‘I promise I am not going to get mad at you if you just tell me the truth’, a notion that made you shudder. What if, unbeknownst to you, he was the kind of parent that would snap too? There was no guarantee that he wasn’t. Many a times you had seen perfectly happy and peaceful kids coming home to… much less than happy families, so if he was going to shout at you, you should just take it. Your grip on the steering wheel grew tighter and you bit your lower lip. The thud of your heartbeat in your temples returned as you pressed on the gas pedal and accelerated, only a couple of blocks away from Nari’s kindergarten already.

“Good stuff.” You brushed the interrogation off, not because you were uncomfortable with your choices, but because it was more than likely that Seonghwa would be, and as such, you ran the risk of exploding in a defensive mode and exposing Nari to a not so pleasant argument. And you were not about that life. You were not into recycling old experiences into new hurt.

Fortunately, Seonghwa got the hint instantly. Like father, like daughter – Nari, upon seeing the young man’s reaction, took it as a sign that she needed to stay put and reserve playtime for later. The rest of the journey crawling through the somnolent sunlit streets was spent in complete silence. You watched and waved back to a once again excited little gremlin, as she hopped out of the car and shouted for her dad to stay back, because she was ‘grown’ and ‘independent’. He had inadvertently shot you a glance upon hearing the words, enjoying the game of pretending that Nari had taken after you a bit too much. You had not looked back, and even how you were supposedly following his precious girl’s run to the front doors had transformed into a thousand-yard stare. Once again, you were in your own world.

“Hey, mind if I move up front?” he pointed at the seat and tilted his head, jolting you out of your turbulent musings.

“Yeah, sure thing. Okay.”

At this proximity, you swore you could catch a hint of his perfume. The vanilla, floral notes and something you could not quite put a finger on was very memorable, and very him. You took a deep inhale and leaned back into the driver’s seat, ready to commence the journey back.

“You can… actually you know what you can drop me off in the business district!” a weight off your shoulders as he suddenly changed your plans for a smoother ride. Masking your relief, you asked for the handsome man to confirm.

“Are you sure? You will need to switch lines… once if I am not mistaken?”

As he ran a hand through his hair, fighting a pesky strand that was threatening to get into his eye, you took the opportunity to study him. Black shirt with a just barely visible patterned design, and the top button undone to reveal three silver necklaces, carefully selected to complement one another. Black trousers, a loose straight cut, falling onto the chunky black and white converse sneakers. And again, that damn perfume that you could not explain to your brain. You did not want to be creepy, but tilted your head towards the man to try and figure out what that mysterious note was. At least you had your question going for you, and your leaning in could be interpreted simply as interest in his response.

“True, but I have some business, ha-ha wow apt, to attend to in the area so…” did not sound like it, but you were not about to argue just when you were in hot water about your morning.

“Okay.” You rolled out of parking, and drove back out onto the street, now bound for your not quite beloved office.

Ever since Monday, you had cemented yourself as one of the first to arrive in the office, and almost always the first to arrive within your assigned team, which had definitely left a good impression on your manager who openly praised you for being so diligent – much to the dismay of the co-workers who enjoyed gossiping about you. But you could not care less since you and Yunho did the exact thing except in reverse. There were some benefits to waking up at hell o’clock, even if it came with socio-gastronomical sacrifices. Which apparently, Seonghwa made his mission to reverse as he sharply turned his head and made a pointing gesture.

“And I’ll buy you breakfast. Y/N don’t you dare argue with me I have access to some dark magic.”

“Like?”

“Here comes the airplane. Wildly effective. So, if you decline then do expect a projectile croissant.” He threatened, stifling a chuckle.

“What if I want to see a croissant fly?” you countered, shaking your head and gleaming, the greyness of the streets which you navigated not appearing so soul draining anymore.

“Well then I will organise that just for you.”

Seonghwa was not sure what had gotten into him, but his desire to step in and help was nearly unbearable. You were every bit a business person, rushing and dedicating your life to your career even if you did have friends and family. But as he knew from having been working together with someone who had an awfully similar mindset to you, such people often forgot to take care of themselves. It was as if you deemed yourselves either not worthy of time spent, or you never felt the need nor the appeal of caring. And if you were to be acting in the role of his wife, the last thing Seonghwa wanted to see was you masking a perpetual misery. You were striving for best behaviour when you were interacting with Nari, showing a playful and easy-going side of you that he thought that he would never get the chance to see again, and generally were working hard to impress his daughter. But it seemed that you needed a push in the right direction of how exactly you could make him even happier than he already was.

You were dangerously attractive when you were driving, he concluded. The unwavering focus on the road, paired with reflexive movements as you reacted to what you had probably predicted ages in advance was making Seonghwa unreasonably flustered, and he had to force himself to look at the lines on the road instead of constantly looking at you. You had been one of the few people in university who had been a ‘designated driver’, along with your closest friend through the years, since most of the others dismissed the skill as something for a ‘later time’ and not immediately important for studies. It had amused him when these same people would then beg for you to effectively become a carpooling service. Even more amusing was that you had always had the guts to decline.

Now, your driving style had gotten even more refined, more natural. It was clear that you had long passed the stage of novice driver, too many miles and experiences under your wheels to still be considered a learner. Cruising through the city, cruising through life. Seonghwa doubted that you would remember, but there had been one time when you two had been sat, just like this, listening to some indie music that you had said helped you focus. But now the silence you shared was heavier, the impact of every action having the potential to cause greater damage. As such, he kept the memory to himself, instead drifting into the pleasant rumble of the car engine.

Right when the sun washed over Seonghwa’s side of the car after having hopped out from behind a skyscraper, forcing him to flip open the visor, it hit you. Coffee. Of course that last note had to be coffee.

With a croissant in one hand an a steaming takeaway cup of coffee in the other, mother goose in the form of a cheery Seonghwa ushered you towards your office, wishing you a good day at least twice, while you kept on trying to explain the best way to get to the metro station as, clearly, he had not planned his ‘business’ out in the slightest.

If you had been aware that his business was to make sure you had at least some form of nourishment and perked up to a satisfactory level, you would have probably thrown hands, so the young man had to resort to being cryptic, rocking on his feet, hands stuffed in his pockets as he said one last goodbye to you and followed your form as you entered your building, crossed a large reception area, passed some security turnstiles and finally, were swallowed by an elevator. So this was how this life was.

He closed his eyes and listened to the industrial noise. The whirring of cars all around him, construction of a new residential complex, designed not for aesthetic purposes, but to eventually raise the land price, the chatter of people who made the financial world, and as such the world itself turn, the whistling of a strong breeze that hit the top floors, zooming past antennae, wiring and air conditioning exhausts. A beautiful, cold world that he had previously imagined himself in. Seonghwa peeked out once again to take in the surroundings: the glossy windows, the sleek modern architecture and abstract expressionist sculptures installed in miniature street squares. Funny how, as he had seen you enter one of the many ant houses, a sense of clarity washed over him. This was your habitat. Your home. Not his. And he should not beat himself up over it. Especially when you were so much more passionate about it, and as such so much more deserving of the best space here.

You were there, behind one of the many windows, working hard for success. And now, he was part of that strenuous operation, at least by a fraction. That was what he could do, and how he could contribute. The possibility of you and him collaborating in enviable synchronicity was an exciting prospect, now that he could feel the space in which you worked. He could handle his tasks, you could handle yours – the domestic daydreaming left him breathless as he began to amble in a random direction, not taking his eyes off the bright blue sky.

Except his blissful state of ideation did not last long enough for him to plot as far as he would like. Two men in what had to be designer office wear were standing next to him at a pedestrian crossing, waiting for the light to turn green. But that in itself was harmless. It was the fact that the shorter of the two, the one who was explaining something very animatedly to his colleague, practically painting a scene with his hands, suddenly mentioned your name – each syllable resounding like a gunshot.

Could it be someone else? Maybe there was another Y/N out there, in this same district – there were thousands of people in these offices, so the chances were definitely not zero. But as Seonghwa discreetly listened in, it became clearer and clearer – these were your colleagues, and they were talking about you. And in a way that set off every single alarm bell in Seonghwa’s totally mission-focused brain.

“Look Yeo, I’m telling you she is super cute. And I don’t give me that look. So what if she agreed to a meeting only on Friday? It doesn’t mean you have zero chance.”

Sure you do. Seonghwa mentally responded, but furrowed his brows as he realised that he was being protective of someone who was not actually his someone, but a fake someone who, in reality, he was conducting questionable business with. Technically, that meant that you could date in secret – as long as it was hidden from the eyes of your superiors. Would you do it? There wasn’t exactly any infidelity to speak of if you did, since he was just an old college friend and a complicated present social tie-up. No. No you couldn’t. This kind of connection would risk your promotion, wouldn’t it? Whatever these fiends were plotting could very well ruin your career, and he, acting in the role of your husband, had to think of a strategy to put a stop to this.

“It just means that she is a busy woman, on her grind, achieving and thriving – just your type, isn’t that right?” the enthusiastic man who, much like Seonghwa, was dressed head to toe in black, and sported a long parted fringe that framed his beaming face, continued his encouragements. Except the mention of types, he was right, at least. You were busy. Too busy to consider them, so they should make their damn exit.

The stubborn light was still red as cars continued to dash past the trio. The man by the name of Yeo, which Seonghwa assumed was an abbreviation or a nickname, was good looking enough for him to be irritated. A muscular physique, with perfect skin and impeccably styled locks that highlighted his features that looked to have been sculpted by some aesthetic deities… yes, this man had to disappear out of yours and Seonghwa’s shared life immediately. Seonghwa did not need a man he ‘did not have to worry about’ right there in the same office space as you.

“Mm, right.”

A man of few words, huh? Maybe that was his problem. Then there was a chance that you would drop him fast as lightning – you liked your philosophical discussions, always did and if he could not formulate an opinion, he was automatically out of the game-

“But I do not wish to be a burden for her, Wooyoung. As much as I admire and respect her, I am only a slot in her timetable at the moment. And whilst I appreciate your support, we should remain realistic and pace ourselves.”

Shit. His voice was deep and dependable. And he had fantastic rhythm to his speech. Uh oh. Seonghwa suddenly wished that he was still in the café with you, and had, instead of letting you go to have the strong double shot of bitterness at your desk, insisted that you spent some more time together. Then he would not hear this atrocity, and since the café was not far from the building, they might have detected you in the shop front window.  Would have been a win-win situation. Alas, this Yeo, and his equally ambitious friend Wooyoung had to be combatted in more creative ways.

Seonghwa’s hands moved on their own accord as he took out his mobile phone, scrolling to the contact he had saved as ‘wife’, with not one but two upwards graph emojis as an ode to your job, and clicking the call button. As he heard you answer with a cautious, whispered hello and an elaboration that he should wait a second as you moved to a conference room, the initial wave of panic subsided and he relaxed into your tone.

“What is it, Hwa?” if only he could loop how you said his nickname and listen to it whenever he wanted… no, he must remain focused.

“Hey, Y/N!” he purposefully spoke louder, spotting in his peripherals that he had caught the attention of the duo. Their conversation had lulled, and they were pretending to be looking at the light to cross, but in reality, were tuning their imaginary antennae to pick up more of the conversation.

“Yes, ‘tis me. And we literally just spoke, what’s up?” he heard a sliding of a door, and the ambiance changing to that of a closed space, giving your voice more space to bloom and show its colour. Seonghwa smiled, stalling a bit before picking up a simple conversation topic, but pointing towards a mock level of intimacy that a certain Yeo should never reach.

“How’s the breakfast?” he refrained from chuckling as he saw Wooyoung appear particularly bewildered.

“Honestly it was exactly what I needed right now, I am already feeling so much better. Thank you for it, and for treating me, really.”

“Oh, not a problem at all! Anything for you.” Even though he inwardly cringed at the phrase, it seemed to have a desired effect on his audience who exchanged confused glances. At the same time, you moved the phone away from you and snorted in laughter.

“You sound so awkward right now what the hell? You good?” he needed to think fast. How could he avoid saying that he was ‘overstepping boundaries and barely a week into a fake relationship was acting lowkey possessive of you to the point where he felt the need to assert dominance over people who simply mentioned you’? That was right. What was going to annoy you enough to let go of his questionable behaviour?

“Uhm… well, could you point me in the direction of the metro again?” Bingo. The groan that you let out, and undoubtedly followed by a rolling of the eyes, was enough for him to confirm that you fully bought the little fib. He swore he heard that same man, Wooyoung, scoff, while Yeo remained suspiciously quiet.

“Are you kidding me? I literally just explained that from the café, you take a right, and then-”

“Ah, a right… so that’s where the problem is…” he continued, intentionally adding sprinklings of cluelessness to his act.

“You can’t be serious… Park Seonghwa where are you?” strict, but adorably concerned for his wellbeing, you asked.

“At a crossing.”

“What crossing?”

“There is a fancy fountain on the other side of the street.”

“You’re there? Damn, you know what, stay put, I will walk you to the station seeing as you are directionally challenged.” And with that, he could make out the sound of footsteps on a carpeted floor, a rustling as you probably pressed the phone to your shirt, distant ‘I’ll be back in a bit’ and, in a matter of moments, clicking and a much stronger echo to each sound.

“I’ll take that label and wear it with pride, Y/N. Then, see you soon, yeah?”

“Uh-huh, oh directionally challenged man. I’ll be there in five. Stay put and don’t get lost in the square please. Like, find a bench or something and don’t move.” A ding of an elevator. You ended the call. And now, each stride like that of a victor in a ruthless battle, he overtook the two men who were not so discreetly gawking at him, with the goal of finding some bench in the square to sit on and await your arrival.

Seonghwa thought that his performance was over, and relaxed into the seat that he had stumbled upon: partially in the shade of a green maple, but still welcoming some of the more amiable sun rays. But little did he know that, instead of this being an epilogue to the indirect interaction with your colleagues that threatened his pride, he had just inadvertently completed a tutorial, and now was in for a game of a lifetime.

“Uhm, excuse me? Pardon for my very rude behaviour, but I believe I overheard you mentioning a certain Y/N that works around here?”

Seonghwa raised his head, which had previously been resting on the back of the bench, only to discover that the two men he had perceived as a threat to his status, in particular that Greek statue in the form of Yeo, were standing right in front of him, expectant.

“Yes… I did indeed. And who are you, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Ah, before we introduce ourselves, would you confirm if this is L/N Y/N you were talking to?”

“…Yes?” Seonghwa stood up, in a last-minute effort to be polite towards the gentlemen, who only a few minutes ago, he wanted to erase from the planet, or at least from your plans. They accepted the gesture and gave him space.

The sun was beating down on Seonghwa more aggressively than before, making him wonder whether this was due to it actually getting hotter, or because he was more and more enticed by the idea of the ground opening up beneath him and letting him exit the conversation.  

“Right, sorry for the suddenness. It’s just that we are her colleagues. Well, from different departments but still. I am Jung Wooyoung. Human Resources.” A bow, another bow. Wooyoung did not look too pleased, clearly reading his every micromovement.

“I’m Kang Yeosang. Cybersecurity.” Passive enough, neither of the two cared enough to try and be threatening.

“And you?” Wooyoung inquired, raising his eyebrows.

“Ah yes, apologies. Park Seonghwa. Department not found.”

Polite chuckles. Dead silence. Wind whistling. Where were you? The three fumbled for anything to say, finally settling on the weather, and then moving towards neutral work topics. Evidently, Wooyoung had a lot more to say, and with each passing minute, the coil on which said questions were contained was being wound tighter and tighter, until it was ready to damn near detonate.

“What is this gang meet up, huh?” finally, you appeared from behind a tall hedge, your work pass hanging around your neck from a lanyard, swaying with each step you took. Once you approached the group, you looked at each member of the trio, pausing when you saw Yeosang.

“Ah hello! You must be Yeosang, right? I guess we are meeting sooner than expected.” Chuckling in pure corporate, you nodded in greeting.

“Indeed, we are. Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

“So, Y/N, care to explain… this mister Seonghwa?” Wooyoung interjected, his curiosity getting the best of him.

This was deeply disconcerting, you concluded. There was an element to this ordeal that you were missing, and this element was crucial to understanding how Wooyoung was going to proceed. He was smart, perceptive. You could even dare to say ‘cunning’. And it was apparent that he had caught onto something, and was not going to let go until everything came to light. You bit the inside of your cheek as you glanced at Seonghwa, who was doing everything in his power to avoid eye contact. There was one clean way out, and one that was inevitably going to make you, and the man in front of you snowball into something only fate could decide the outcome of. While chances were slim, nevertheless you took the first option…

“Well, you already got to know one another. I’d say that’s enough. Now, I need to take this man to the metro so if you don’t mind, we will be heading over yonder-” …only for it to fail miserably as Wooyoung saw through you.

“Oh no, no, like… who is this? A friend? A boyfriend? I need details, you are having breakfast and stuff together… who is he?”

If looks could kill, then you would be a fake widow. It did not take much brain power to figure out that the conversation you had over the phone had been staged for whatever reason. And now, you were in a mess where your little sitcom for a promotion might shut down… unless you committed. Fully. Wooyoung was staring you down. Yeosang had one eyebrow raised and arms crossed, judging. And Seonghwa was only a few levels away from impersonating Edvard Munch’s ‘The Scream’. To hell with all of this. Deep breath in. Breath out.

“My husband.”

[transnpd]

Tips for being transpermahigh?

Tw for drug use (specifically weed)

Tips under cut

So if you don't use weed or are just unable to, behaviors itself are just enough

- constantly munching on something, it can be small like crackers n stuff, weed tends to make you hungry

- more prone to laughing, laughing at the smallest jokes or even things that don't seem funny to other people, example being I once was laughing so hard about the sentence "the voices told me so therefore it's true"

- eye drops, this is more of an "excuse" type of thing, but saying that you are using eye drops to help with red eyes is good (just don't overuse them since that can fuck with ur vision)

- half shut eyes, when high your eyes usually aren't fully open, they are usually halfway closed

If you do use weed, here are my tips!

- go little by little, this applies to any method of consuming, weather that be edibles or smoking, only take small amounts if it is your first time to try and get a feel for tolerance and how you act

- have a trip sitter, usually weed shouldn't be a bad experience, but it's good to have a trip sitter just incase since it can make you paranoid

- take breaks! After long and repeated use you won't feel the affects anymore, it takes around 2-3 weeks for it to fully leave your body and reset your tolerance back to 0, 1-2 weeks for it to be down about half way, also CHS is VERY REAL and VERY SCARY since if you get it you most likely will not be able to smoke at all

- Psychonauts journal and wiki, it's an app that I use, it has a list of all kinds of drugs, even ones you didn't know existed, including cannabis

- if you aren't comfortable with smoking, try edibles, if you aren't comfortable with edibles, try drinks, this really only works if you have access to a dispensary since options are limitless

- TEST YOUR FUCKING SUBSTANCE PLEASEEEE!!!! it's not often that dealers will lace weed like opiates, but it still can happen, fentanyl and other types of test strips are free and you can ask for them at hospitals, clinics, or other organizations, This will not apply if you get your stuff from the dispensary, only if you are buying from a dealer, I don't care about "but I trust them!" TEST YOUR SUBSTANCE!!

- for a perma part, try to be smoking often but not too often (if that makes sense??), like, stick to a routine, for me personally, I only smoke during the night as that's when I have free time and recreational time, while during the day I either stick to edibles to help intensify my permahigh or just don't smoke at all

- please learn that psychological dependence IS A THING, tolerance breaks will SUCK for the first few days, and honestly? There's not really a quick fix to it, but some tips I have is taking a nap or smelling cigs since they tend to smell bad to me and get rid of my smoking urges (or u can smoke cigs too if you already do, idc it's ur life)

Hope this helps! Please stay responsible with substances and always check in with your doctor if you believe something may be wrong!!

[drdemonprince]

Crying listening to the audiobook (currently on Ch 5). This is the only autism book that I've resonated with. Slowly absorbing over the past few months bit by bit. I hope I can unmask. I feel like I've masked myself into an avoidance hole because I can't maintain my old masks and people don't respond well to me as me, and then I retreat. I'm a walking mirror.. I don't know how to be me as its so automatic at this point and I'm just perma-burnt out and agoraphobic. This book is helping, thank you

I'm glad it's helping. Please don't put too much pressure on yourself to throw out all these coping mechanisms all at once and reveal a singular unmasked person dwelling within. I know that is often the fantasy we have when we're digging into this stuff, it certainly was for me, but that expectation isn't realistic and can be painful. Those coping mechanisms have helped protect you. Your brain and body were smart to develop them, even if the best options that they devised when you were younger really hurt. We are our experiences, we are what we've learned and what we've seen, and one day these painful times will help connect you to the many many other people who have also had to mirror others and create personas that helped them stay alive, too. Inside of you all the answers are dwelling, it will just take time and safety and reflection and acceptance from others to help call it out.

[angelasscribbles]

WIP Folder Game

I've done this one before, but it's been awhile, so I'll play again!

Rules: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it! And then tag as many people as you have wips. This is for both art and writing!

I've already shared snippets of most, if not all, of these in various posts: Sunday Six, WIP Wed, One shot WIP Snips, etc. But I suppose if anyone wanted another peek, I wouldn't be opposed to it, so here they are:

Savage Love Ch 20

Star Crossed Ch 9

The King's Punishment Ch 3 (Which is pretty much done by the way)

Divorce

Homecoming Part 2

First Impressions Liam

First Impressions Drake

Liam and Max

limo

Madeline

Max and Riley one night stand

Operation Sunflower

Paintball

Rashad Riley ab Charlotte

I actually have several wips from Savage Love in there because I write ahead, but I'm afraid sharing even the names of the docs will give away important plot points so I think I'll leave those out! Well, there's one that won't give away too much and will be coming up in the next three or so chapters anyway, so I'll just thow the title of the word doc out there: Three.

Thanks so much to @mydemonsdrivealimo for the tag. I'm just going to tag my entire perma list and anyone that wants to can play along!!

PermaTags:

  @nestledonthaveone @gkittylove99 @karahalloway  @texaskitten30 @tessa-liam

@kachrisberry @fangirling12566 @belencha77 @lovingchoices14 @twinkle-320

@21-wishes @secretaryunpaid @lunaseasblog  @princessleac1 @bebepac

@emersyn-in-cordonia @walkerdrakewalker @73geenalove @tornbetween2loves @sillydg

@pinklipsandmasonjars @savannahdix @jennieausten @kingliam2019 @3pawandme

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[jerzwriter]

Sunday Six

I literally pulled one story from my whip folder for each pairing at random. I'm kind of sloppy this week. I think you all for tolerating my neurodivergent self.

Untitled Coffee Shop AU Request - OH - Ethan/Kaycee

Traditions - WTD - Eli/Zoe

Crash (Their Start Ch. 10) - OH - Tobias/Casey

Untitled Coffee Shop AU Request - OH - Ethan/Kaycee

He peeked in the window and saw her again, seated behind the counter with a chalkboard on her lap, her hands flailing about animatedly as she laughed at her own story. It may have been his imagination, but he swore he heard that laugh through the window on the street. Did those she was talking to understand how blessed they were just to be in her presence?

Suddenly aware of how long he'd been standing there, he nervously looked around. Fortunately, it would take more than a 6'3" lovesick doctor staring at the object of his affection to catch the attention of the jaded Boston pedestrians. Now he had a second reason to love this city.

Traditions - WTD - Eli/Zoe

“Good morning to my wonderful friends,” he sang before catching a scowling glare from one. “… and Eli. Why so glum, Pal?”

“Because some of us have been up working on maneuvers all morning. And you were….”

“Working on something far more important,” Troy grinned. “Most of you are unaware, so let me fill you in. This upcoming Friday is a glorious day, a day more unique than all others….”

“Troy,” Zoe cautioned. “No.”

“Well, now we have to know!” Angel insisted.

“No, we don't,” Zoe reaffirmed a rare tinge of annoyance in her voice. “Knock it off, Troy. OK? It's not important!"

“Oh, I bet you’d be outnumbered on that,” her best friend insisted.

“Not if you keep your mouth shut, and it's not put to a vote! Now, change the topic, because this conversation is over.”

Crash (Their Start Ch. 10) - OH - Tobias/Casey

He tried to focus on work. Normally, that would do the trick, but the more he tried to push thoughts of her out of his mind, the more vividly she appeared. He reached into his pocket and nearly pulled out his phone but let it drop just as quickly. What was the point? The result would be the same. He tossed his pen and sat back with a frustrated sigh. Someday he was going to have to find out why this woman had such a strong hold over him, but today wasn't going to be that day.

"Dr. Carrick!" Aurora yelled as she came crashing through the door.

"We don't knock when entering our boss's offices anymore?" he snarled, quickly realizing he couldn't take out his frustration with her roommate on his employee. He rubbed his eyes and held up a hand. "I'm sorry. Let's start this conversation again. How can I help you, Dr. Emery?"

"You haven't heard?" Aurora asked, her voice almost unrecognizable. Only then did he look and notice her, visibly shaken.

"Aurora, what's going on?"

"It's Edenbrook," she muttered, grabbing the remote control from his desk and flicking on the TV. "It's Edenbrook..."

@choicesficwriterscreations

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[tarnishedxknight]

{out of dalmasca} I realize that I have never explained why I prefer Basch with long hair and why I’ve always imagined him keeping longer hair despite his drastic and messy hack in the canon game. I do think it looks better aesthetically speaking, but that’s not the main reason why. A bit of a rant about hair below, haha. Enjoy. XD

We’re all familiar (those of us in the fandom, of course) with his canon game hair, atrociously cut, perma-stiff, barely moving with the wind except somehow often oddly indoors???, and quite honestly apparently hairsprayed? Does hairspray even exist in Ivalice? Because if not, his hair isn’t just a crime against nature and fashion, but also in defiance of the laws of physics. Yes, we know it, we love hate it, it has been the subject of many a joke and meme, I present to you... TheBasch™:

*sigh* Sweetheart, what even do you call that? Aesthetically, it’s an absolute abomination. In my head, Basch has semi-normal, average medieval fantasy man hair, one of many reasons I use CH in T:TDW as his live action FC:

So this is around the length I imagine him with and that’s his usual hairstyle, maybe minus the braids, but yeah. Half-ponytail, tied in the back with a leather strip, and yes, messy with strands hanging down. All dungeon imprisonment and sweaty adventuring aside, assuming he has access to proper bathing facilities, Basch keeps himself and his hair very clean. He’s just... a clean guy, when he can help it. So his hair is clean and all that, but... messily styled. Because there is no style. He puts it back in a half-ponytail without the use of a mirror, and just... that’s how it is. He doesn’t take it down again until he retires to bed, and he doesn’t do too much about strands that don’t make it into the ponytail. I’ll come back to that later.

Although this is 1047% better aesthetically speaking, the reason I imagine him with this hair is actually to do with his mental health. First, I will clarify that I imagine him with this length of hair and general style post-Nalbina-dungeon. Before that, I hate it, but I accept his canon hair. But after he’s busted out of the dungeon, the game chooses to have him almost immediately hack off the two years’ worth of hair growth (which honestly to me looked like way more than would grow in two years) to reset him back to his canon terrible hair. I... kindof reject that, and I say he keeps the long hair.

The reason for this is kindof nebulous in that I don’t have a clearly definable reason why, but I do have an explanation. It’s a coping mechanism for him. A security blanket, if you will. A way of protecting himself mentally. How does one do that with hair, you ask? Well first of all, it isn’t deliberate. He doesn’t even realize that that’s why he’s keeping his hair long. It’s just that he feels calmer, more grounded, and strangely enough, safer with the feeling of having long hair around him. Like... around his shoulders and framing his face. That’s why he doesn’t overly pay attention to the loose strands that don’t make it into the ponytail. Leaving it completely down would be a problem during combat, because it would constantly be getting in his face, so the half-ponytail fixes that, but the loose strands against and around his face still give him that feeling of mental security. They don’t obstruct his vision enough to be a problem, but they do the trick well enough with regard to his mental health.

Again, I don’t have a reason for him wanting to do this, and if he was asked, he would probably not be able to give much of a response. He doesn’t know. It’s a subconscious feeling of comfort that he gets from the feeling of his hair around him. It makes him feel more closed off, I guess? Not in a bad way, but just... the world seems a bit smaller and more under control with that feeling of something draping around his shoulders. I know it makes no sense at all, but this is actually something that people in real life sometimes experience when they’ve had a lot of trauma. It’s almost in the same vein as wearing oversized, baggy clothing or maybe something with a hood. That’s another type of just... draping yourself in something to kindof put this buffer between yourself and the world. Of course neither oversized clothing nor long hair really protects you from anything, but like I said, it’s an issue of mental security, a coping mechanism.

Since the majority of writing I do for Basch takes place after his stint at Nalbina, he’s got the longer hair. It’s a trauma response from what he experienced in the dungeon. Regardless of what he tries to tell people or deny to himself, that imprisonment changed him and left him with both physical and mental scars. He’s managed to repress a lot of it and he hides the effects of it from most people, but his long hair is a side-effect of that trauma and he doesn’t even realize it. I headcanon that he’s got a little bit of a fuller beard post-Nalbina too. It’s his armor against the world, in a mental health sense.

And there you have it, folks. More than you ever wanted to know about Basch’s hair. XD

[onlyjaeyun]

babie zadie!!! if you have one/ create one IM ON MY KNEES BEGGING PLEASE to add me to your perma taglist.

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

also crying bc ch is over and there won’t be anymore ynhoon angst 🤣🤣🤣

BABY!!!!🥺🥺🥺🤍 thank you so much for your sweet words and don't worry, i'll be announcing my permanent taglist very soon since i'll be writing single pieces for a while and want everyone to be around for when they drop!!!🤍 i love you so much 🥺🤍

[galadion]

yesterday i went with the sproutlings on their first treasure dungeon.

we went right every time... and managed to make it all the way to the end.

[clonehub]

And tbh howzers pallete in this ep was better than some of the palettes I've seen for like. Every other clone before this (if I'm remembering correctly)

[hwaightme]

Family for Hire (Ch.1)

(family for hire ml) -> blurb and general tags in series ml

☀️ pairing: single dad!seonghwa x business woman!reader ☀️ genre: romance, family, domestic, fake marriage, slice of life ☀️ ch. summary: sometimes all you need is a not so gentle nudge from your friend to reconsider a four year silence. ☀️ ch. wordcount: 5.1k ☀️ ch. warnings/tags: language, suggestive, food/eating, social media creeping, talk of discrimination, mention of affairs, university, gossip, two friends roasting each other, a cheeky bit of promiscuity, lost contact, hint at family trauma, comparison between siblings, marriage, relationships ☀️ perma-taglist: @doom-fics @layzfeelit @acciocriativity @izuijin @justhere4kpop @honey-lemon-goose @byuntrash101 ☀️ series taglist: @yunnierights ☀️ a/n: Hello there! big hugs and much love, hope you enjoy this chapter~

Chapter 1 - Promotion Proposal

“Honestly, your chances of getting that promotion are slim. I mean, you have to look at the facts for a second here, Y/N. Not a single one of the regional managers is single. And don’t get me started on the status that is attached to having kids and generally being a family person. They would basically make you CEO if you were child-popping machine.”

“Ew, now that is an image I did not want to have over lunch. Thanks, Yunho.”

Vexed, you forked at the watery, stale pasta salad that you had brought with you to work in the one beat-up Tupperware box you owned. You had been repeating the motion for the last five minutes already, and your close friend and colleague was not helping reignite your appetite a single bit. Whilst you enjoyed the daily routine of juicy office gossip and old-timer-style reminiscing about university, his shamelessness and ability to say outrageous or painfully truthful things with the most innocent look on his face never failed to irritate you.

“Anytime babes.” He pronounced, sending you a wink as he purposefully took a longer time to lick his spoon. You visibly gagged and shielded your face with your lower arm until you heard a burst of laughter.

“Another ew?” as Yunho returned to eating not so sensually, you uttered the question, unamused, and intending it to be rhetorical. Alas, he did not appear to share that with you, instead continuing to drive you up the wall:

“Would you rather I call you baby girl?”

“Dude save your kinks to yourself for your hoes please.” You pressed your cool hand to your forehead in an attempt to not rage quit then and there. And yet, a smile still danced on your lips. This was how your dynamic with Yunho had always been.

You had met during orientation in the first week of first year at university: you had accidentally knocked into each other while chatting with your new respective acquaintances, he had called you a battering ram, you had called him a Scooby Doo looking-ass, and the rest was history. It was a match made in hell, with you two bringing out the most colourful traits in one another. But it was all in sibling fashion: only you had the right to roast him into oblivion, and vice versa. If anyone else dared to try, they would get beat either by you, or by Yunho. Such was the rule that survived all the way through the years. Through your friend’s turbulent fraternity years and your unstoppable hustle from one job and internship to another. All the way until now, when you two ended up at the same company, and even though you had joined two years earlier than Yunho, he already climbed to your step on the ladder. More proof of discrimination and disregard of consistent effort to support your seething rage.

“Hey, don’t call my ladies like that!” after giving it a few seconds of thought, he retorted.

“Okay yeah fair. Yun-hoe.” You let the last syllable fly off your tongue in a languid manner, purposefully enunciating it in a borderline accusatory manner.

“What are we, fifth graders?” Unimpressed, your friend raised an eyebrow and stared back at you.

“In this economy, it would be lit to be a fifth grader. Be a boss at Roblox…”

“That is one luxury fifth grade life you are imagining there, Y/N.”

“What? A girl can dream. Just like about this damn promotion.”

It was hard to not continuously think about it. With the end of quarter approaching and management undoubtedly starting to think about bonuses, raises and positional promotions, you were getting nervous. You had heard too many stories about workers being forced to stay in the same place for most of their lives, even though they were fantastic, even though they had strived for the stars, all because of a handful of people higher than them in status deciding that they ‘did not vibe with them’ or that ‘they could not be bothered with this person’. It was terrifying to think that there always were more reasons to fire someone rather than keep them, let alone give them a better position in the business.

“Hey! I did not say that it was impossible, just, difficult. I mean, look at me. I got to the associate role pretty fast.” Yunho raised both of his hands slightly, as though he was defending himself.

“By sleeping with an executive’s daughter?” you reminded, pointing at him with your fork.

“Oi, I only found out about that after I got the raise,” your friend fired back, trying to poke the cutlery in your hand with his index finger, prompting you to retract your arm right back.

“Yun-hoe bringing in the big bucks with his special talents,” although it was a mere mumble, Yunho still overheard you and decided to stick with his classic image:

“I mean, no one has any complaints…”

“Ugh. Not even funny. Seriously though, I am not about that whole strategy one bit.”

“Wasn’t even suggesting it. Unless you are into sleazy married middle-aged men with a thirst for young blood.”

“You have a way with words, my guy.”

“We try, we try.”

“I swear. This family thing is ridiculous. You aren’t the only one to mention it either. I have heard some chicks gossiping about it in this exact canteen and sheesh it makes me livid. They were literally talking about themselves like objects!?” your gestures were getting wilder by the second as you immersed yourself in a passionate monologue, recollecting what you had personally had to be a witness to. “There isn’t just this nonsense with families, otherwise there would be plenty of women high up in the ranks. There is just blatant misogyny that people seem to want to willingly ignore and brush under the carpet! I swear, this company is corrupt to its very core.”

“Tell me, why are you in this company again?” part of you was disappointed that this was all Yunho had to say about the serious matter, but at the same time, you knew that he had been listening to it since college, and that you had his unshakeable support despite his rather lusty tendencies. As he liked to put it ‘he just loved women’.

“So that I can soak up all the knowledge and start my own, duh!”

“Oh yes, revolution and revenge hours. But for now, how are you planning to proceed?” finally, the conversation was back on its original track, and you settled into your pensiveness, letting the worry simmer.

“I really don’t know. Like, I wish I did. But I am afraid that I might have to take an L and sit this one out.”

“This ain’t it chief. Not the L/N Y/N I know. Grind your gears. Boot up the noggin. Go on, you must have something.” He set down his utensils and clapped demonstratively in front of your face, like that would somehow help in awakening the spirit of capitalism and entrepreneurial gains.

It seemed to work, as after about a minute of pondering, you began to slowly announce a prospective plan:

“Well… there is one. But it would be one complicated act to pull off.”

“I am all ears.”

“So, you know how there are all these evening events, right? And that one family-oriented day?” you asked him, pulling him in deeper into your story. He nodded along.

“Uh huh, there is one in about a month or so, isn’t there?” after getting a confirmation from you, he added, “it is literally prime time family flexing. Expensive flexing at that, the catering is always bomb – last time I literally got a date just to sneak in.”

“Well, I kind of want to do the same. What if I just… fake a family?”

“Yo…”

“I know it’s ridiculous.”

“This is genius.” Yunho’s eyes lit up as he pressed a fist into his other palm, and grinned in approval.

You ran a hand through your hair, a sudden spike of nervousness overtaking you. Though you did propose the idea, you had silently hoped that it would be shot down within a fraction of a second, as it was something so entirely out of character for you that it might as well be a totally different person doing it.

“What… the fuck? Okay… I guess?”

“They want to play you, so you play them. Skilled moves, partner.”

Truth be told, that had indeed been your motivation. If there was a way to take down the corporate structure, you were willing to at least entertain the thought. There was no clear, immediate risk of everything crashing and burning – you were notoriously private about your personal life, rarely indulging in the water cooler conversations where your other colleagues would talk about their toddlers, or their spouses, or their partners… so nobody knew what your official status was. In addition, the last times that family-oriented events had been organised, you purposefully arranged either ‘core leave’, or business trips for months in advance, so no one could question you. It was clear that you were the unlikeliest candidate for ‘family woman’ in most people’s minds because of how you were not the ‘mushy gushy’ type, and you could use that to your advantage. Indeed, as Yunho said, you could play them.

“You can call me that if you actually believe in my business ideas, Yunho.” You chided, rolling your eyes. But Yunho returned the attitude instantly, with cold hard logic to add.

“I’ll believe it when I see you make it past angel investment rounds and successfully pull through the first seeds.”

“You know what, fair. But okay, back to the plan. There is one small problem. I have no idea who would be up for this mission.” You steered it all back to the chaos at hand. If this plan were to seriously go ahead, you needed a better-defined strategy. A business plan of sorts. And that included choosing your literal partner in crime.

“Uh… how about Woo? He is always down for this kind of fuckery.” Yunho’s first suggestion made you shudder as you imagined one of your closer colleagues, Wooyoung, who was working a few floors down from you, acting in the role of your husband.

“Nah, he is very likely to blab, and besides he works in too close proximity with us and would have told everybody and their grandmother about his relationship status update, if it were to happen. Like, random interns know him?!”

“True. Then… Mingi? He’s chill, you remember him, right?” Again, a miss. Although you did find Yunho’s housemate to be the most adorable and hilarious summoner of chaos.

“Yeah, but will he be able to keep the story consistent?”

“You know what, I retract him as an option… hm…”

“Hm, indeed.”

Your mind wandered as you traversed the many avenues and connections you had made over the years, crossing one person after another off your imaginary list of prospective ‘husbands’. You chuckled – were you really thinking about this? Treating it seriously? You – the self-proclaimed spinster, the person who struggled to stay in contact with her own relatives, the one who would rather work overtime than attend a family gathering or holiday? It seemed that your desperation for a professional upgrade had reached a new high. You were aching to take that leap and have more responsibility… just not the one of the family type.

The idea of fooling everyone into believing that you were happily settled and enjoying life to the fullest (in their eyes) was tempting, and besides you had chosen to not indicate your marriage status in your employee information, so they had nothing on you that could be used to disprove what you would serve. It was an empty, green playing field, just for you. And your partner, who you had no clue about. Who would be willing to play along?

The more you thought about it, the more discouraged you began to feel, even after just having had a wave of admiring one’s own genius. No, who were you kidding? This was as you had initially stated, ridiculous. You could not get any one person to stick, disproving them in just a couple of well-aimed critiques. You had even gone so far as to begin going over all the people who you had lost contact with over the years, surprised that you still remembered their names, their stories.

Thanks to Yunho, you had basically infiltrated his frat, and had ended up being ‘one of the bros’ on multiple occasions. So, perhaps, those were the people who you should try hitting up out of the blue. But who? You were sat frozen as the parties, last minute study sessions, group projects flashed by you like a film reel. There was one person who you would want to suggest, at least for attempting to ‘clear the air’, after all these years, but you did not dare utter his name. You searched for alternatives, but none came to mind.

“Wait. I think I’ve got it! Hold on.” Yunho dragged you out of your daze with his exclamation. You watched as he fished out his mobile phone from his trouser pocket, and proceeded to feverishly type. Soon enough, he appeared to have found exactly what, or who, he had been looking for: “Here. See who this is?”

It was him. The one who you had just decided to avoid mentioning, but of course you and Yunho shared a brain cell, so fate would make either you or him bring the same thing up. You leaned in to take a closer look at the photograph that your friend was holding up for you, noticing how this man had grown and, dare you say, bloomed over the years you had not seen him. Features had become noticeably sharper, but his expression still unreadable – though at first, it seemed cheerful, his eyes harboured thunder and lightning. He had re-styled himself, opting for an effortless, fluffy ‘do that softly framed his face, and clothing brighter than you had ever seen him wear back in the day. In that photo, he reminded you of early summertime, whilst before, when he had been one of the most scandalous members of the same frat as Yunho, and something of a friend to you, he had been more of a biting cold winter. You feigned neutrality, mentally patting yourself on the back when your friend either did not notice or did not want to show that he noticed. After giving the photo another glance, you moved back, and exclaimed:

“Woah, that’s Park Seonghwa! Damn, the years did him good, he went through a glow up after his fuckboy era for sure.” That seemed to satisfy Yunho, as he nodded in agreement and flipped the phone back around to continue scrolling, very concentrated on trying to find something.

“Well aside from that you can call him ‘daddy’-” while on his miniature online snooping quest, he mumbled the out of pocket phrase.

“Eyo I don’t mean to kink shame-” you tried to interrupt him, assuming that he was about to turn to the dark side again and get back to cracking not safe for work jokes, while at work.

“Nah, for real, he is an actual daddy. Look-” he spun the phone and stretched his arm out towards you, to the extent that you had to tilt your head back to focus your vision on the screen. And what you saw was something you had never expected to see, not in a million years.

“WHAT? NO WAY? That’s his SPAWN?” you blurted out, forgetting to put your morality and opinion filters on. But the girl was a splitting image of the man, and Seonghwa having close familial ties to here was the only conclusion that could be made. This made your friend snort, mirthful, as he hooked his chair underneath him with one hand, and waddled closer to you so you could indulge in the photos of an entirely socially transformed Seonghwa. Now his ‘lighter’ and sunnier image was totally understandable. He had a life to take care of and someone on whose parade he should try not to rain.

“I think most people would say ‘daughter’, but yes.” Yunho corrected you, clicking away from the photo and searching for another one that he appeared to have already seen. You noticed that some of the pictures that he was showing you he had already liked, sometimes even commented – damn, you lived under a rock didn’t you.

Child. A whole kid. One in hundreds of millions kind of chance, a complicated combination of gametes that then grew into more and more cells until at the end, this mini-sized up-walking homo sapiens popped out. But wait, not out of Seonghwa, you knew that much. So there had to be a certain someone else allowed this creation to come about. Whew, maybe this meant that he was not available, and you could keep on looking for someone else in distressed harmony.

“Okay, but like, wouldn’t that mean that he-” you tried, but was cut off as Yunho guessed what you were about to bring up.

“There is no boo thang on the horizon. None at all. And you know the reunion which you had so rudely missed?” he jumped topic, or maybe not. Sometimes, he was hard to keep up with. All you could ever be confident with, was that if he saw an opportunity to take a jab at you, he would do it.

“Excuse me, mister, I was on a work trip?!” you shot back, slapping the edge of the table for emphasis, but biting the inside of your cheek as you wanted to wince because of the miscalculated enthusiasm with which you hit it.

“Shame, shame, you could have seen me dancing to ABBA.” He playfully pouted as he showed you another picture.

It was, once again, Seonghwa with the little girl, nestled in his arms. What people liked to refer to as ‘a bundle of joy’, apparently. You eyed it. They seemed so happy. So full of love for one another. The girl looked like she felt so safe and adored – truly his princess and the apple of his eye. Seonghwa, over the moon as he grinned with his entire face, crinkling his eyes. His heart appeared to be entirely in his daughter’s hands. This was evidently taken in the summer, as the girl was wearing a flowy baby blue dress, while… her dad (a term you still had to get used to associating with a person who you knew to be a notorious party animal) was wearing a matching unbuttoned striped shirt with some darker blue decal that reminded you of ink splotches, revealing a white under tee, and what looked to be a dog tag necklace. So, they were the colour coordinated ‘we must match’ kind of family, huh.

You decided to stop having prolonged combat against your pasta and shoved the fork into the box and snapped the lid closed. This had allowed you some time to ground yourself again and fly back into discussion. It was easy enough to bring up a vivid image of Yunho dropping it low at a mutual friend’s birthday party after a few too many daiquiris (it had been the first time he allowed you to drive him home – outside of that he would have probably told you that you were a hazard behind the wheel with your temper and turning angles).

“I see that far too often anyways.” You concluded your visit to the memory palace with the remark, making Yunho mimic recoiling from being shot with a gun.

“Fine then, ouch, but alright. Anywho, I had chatted with Seonghwa at the reunion, and I recall him mentioning that ‘it was just him and Nari’, which he then explained is his four-year-old daughter’s name.”

“So, it is fully confirmed… But wait, four? That’s like… how many years it has been since college?” you started counting back, the numbers not adding up, unless he had gotten the ball rolling while still in university. Yunho dispelled your confusion by confirming your suspicions.

“Yeah, man got a head start in the family department.” He sighed as he returned his phone back into his pocket.

It was always strange to see people within your own age group start settling down in some way. There was your friend Jongho, who had managed to get married in secret and only reveal it with one single honeymoon picture. Then San, who had somehow beaten his engagement rejection free pass curse and gotten engaged just a couple of months ago. And now Seonghwa with a whole designer product on display. All these people, doing people things, while you were barely able to figure out what meal prep was and had to debate with yourself every morning whether having three mugs of coffee was sustainable in the long term or not. At least you had a nice car (but even that ended up being a financial strain that gave you extra cortisol).

“I feel aged as shit.” You slouch, resting your head on your upper arm as you bent it at an angle, slowly waving the hand in the air.

“So do I. But I feel like he would be a perfect candidate.” Yunho flicked it, making you mouth an ‘ow’ at him and return to a better posture and massage the hurt skin.

“For being a fake husband?” you hissed out.

“Yeah, I mean, Nari is like, a bonus, no?”

“Maybe? I don’t know…”

You had a reservation against children, one that had manifested itself sometime around secondary school, and one you had not been able to get rid of since. It was not that you ‘hated children’ per se, though it was not challenging for you to spot less than pleasant behaviours. It was just that, they felt like aliens. Little gremlins that lived according to their own rules, not caring for social constructs, proper conduct, and basic boundaries. You barely saw a difference between them and your friends when they were hammered – and that was not your idea of entertainment. Probably the only stark deviation from the alcohol-fuelled bonanza was that the former, the young citizens of the world, were drunk with joy, or at least supposed to be. It was hard to judge when you had always been the sober one.

“Remember the observations. Kids make seniors happy. Happy seniors mean happy news about salary. Happy salary news means happy worker. So go for it.”

Yunho did have a point. This same scheme also operated within traditional households like your own. Last spring, when your younger, but subjectively more ‘successful’ sister had brought home her chubby offspring and a doting husband with an annual salary approaching twenty million won, your parents had been over the moon. It had not been clear because of what exactly, since sister dearest had the full package, but the baby must have been influential – your father had not let go of the infant for the entirety of the day visit, bouncing him on his knees, playing, acting completely unlike himself. Following that day, you had quietly unfollowed your sister on most socials. But that lifestyle did give you a good grasp on what others expect and perceive as ‘happily ever after’ – too bad for them you were not going to let go of your career, but you could put on a show with everything else. All you had to do was swallow a bit of your pride.

“Just do it?” you mumbled, fishing out your own mobile phone and opening up the dreaded app that housed all universe’s flexes, filters and curated truths. And your lost contacts, apparently.

“Yep. In the words of our homie, San, ‘Nike, Adidas’.”

“Wise man.” You found Seonghwa’s profile, which did not really show you much since it was private. You could only just make out his and his daughter’s faces in the profile picture.

“Yeah, so listen to him and go forth.” Yunho egged you on, getting impatient with the way your thumb was hovering over the follow button.

“It has been a hot minute though.” You return to cradling your device with your fingers neatly wrapping the sides. It was hard to separate the person you were seeing on the screen with the person who you had fallen out with during your final year at university. Actually, it was virtually impossible.

“Well heat it up even more by shooting him a message. Doesn’t hurt right? I remember you guys were pretty close back in the day so it shouldn’t be a problem.” It seemed that Yunho was completely skipping over the part when you and Seonghwa had drifted further and further from one another until you had been as good as strangers. If only you had at least a fraction of your friend’s optimism, then maybe reconnecting would not be so daunting, especially since it was for your own benefit. Your mind was going through a full court trial, stuck in a debate.

“But… I didn’t even know about… this?” you tilted the screen once more, leading to Yunho attempting, albeit failing, to snatch your phone. He shook his head and chided:

“Well, that’s because you barely use Instagram you loser.”

“Jeong Yunho-”

“Don’t government name my ass; I am inspiring you. You need to get shit done? Do it.”

What was the likelihood of Seonghwa being mad at you, or holding a grudge, considering how long it had been since you two last had last spoken? You wanted to dream that the probability of that was low enough for you to give this impromptu action plan a go. In hindsight, you could almost say that the drama had not even been drama, just a little misunderstanding. Just you confessing to the wrong person at the wrong time and in the wrong state. Nothing you could not get over, and something that he had definitely done, and had a mini clone to prove it.

“To be honest, even if it doesn’t work out,” you conceded to Yunho’s intense encouragement, pressing on the button and opening up direct messages, “at least I’ll be able to catch up with an old… friend?”

“Hm, yeah. Seonghwa returned to my radar only recently too. Been missing in action ever since…” he trailed off, catching you turning morose, “… since, yeah. I don’t really know the details. But something tells me you still have a couple of things to resolve with him. So, for your sake, go for it and do it for the promotion and for your peace of mind.”

“I don’t know what you mean, Yunho.”

Your friend sent you a pointed look, not entertained by your feigned ignorance. Yunho had been on the sidelines of what had happened between you two, but due to Seonghwa’s sudden departure from the fraternity, and near total conversion to completing his studies online, had never found out the details. Now, he could roughly infer that it had been a series of misunderstandings that had been left abandoned, still wound together, and needed your collaboration to work through. Retrace the steps back.

“He asked about you, you know. Tried to be all discreet about it, too. But you know how obvious that guy is when he is being genuine.”

“Pfft-” you scoffed. Yunho was following his own agenda, like always. If it had not been so strongly linked with the career ladder you wished to climb, you would have shut him down at least five minutes ago. You were contemplating the possibility of conversing with Seonghwa, after a lifetime and a bit had passed, a little too seriously for your enjoyment.

“He’s such a sap now, you will be fine. I expect you to be like an undercover reporter for me please, okay sweetheart?”

You were glad that Yunho was not one to change much, or at least you saw him so often that you were changing at the same pace. That way, existing day to day was not too intimidating. This was yet another reason why children were a scary concept – they reminded you that time went by far too quickly, and if you were to succeed, and prove that you were able to carve out your own path despite derogatory remarks and disinterest, you needed to move at the speed of light. You wished you did not have to be so acutely aware of time, but this was something you had been practically born with. In addition to the hatred for Yunho’s tendency to call you anything aside from your name.

“Say a pet name one more fucking time and I will forcibly marry you.” You locked your phone, setting it down, and folded your hands together and pointed straight at your friend as though you were holding a gun. The dark-haired man raised both of his in return, and with a gasp, deadpanned:

“Shock, horror, murder with intent.” As you puffed out a ‘gunshot’, snorting at the dramatic imitation of a drama actor getting hit with a bullet in slow motion, you retraced your own intentions with this project.

At the end of the day, none of this was about Seonghwa. If anything he would be a collaborator, and you were more than ready to pay him if he so wished to receive money as a compensation. People put up all sorts of things for rent nowadays, so offering family services was not at all strange.

“Plus, I am doing this for my promotion, so I really don’t like your implied ulterior motives here.” You concluded out loud, hands flittering across the table.

“What ulterior motives?” Yunho batted his eyes, intentionally over exaggerating.

“Bro, I can read you, we are the exact same.”

“Speaking of, we have the exact same meeting, happening in the exact same five minutes. Are we going?”

“With all this scheming I completely forgot. Yes, let’s go.”

As you rose from the canteen table and briskly strode in the direction of the elevators, with Yunho switching the topic entirely to complaining about the agile framework and how his line manager had an odd way of organising work sprints, you did not notice your phone ping.

Seonghwa followed you back.

And was currently staring at his device in disbelief, poring over the meagre selection of photos that you did have gracing your profile. What could this mean? Would he be able to reconnect with you? Speak with you? Retrace? He could not stop himself when he opened messages, only slightly regretting the use of two exclamation points and double texting, and typed out a quick, amiable, yet hopeful:

<hwa.seong.hwa > Y/N, hi!! Long time no speak

<hwa.seong.hwa> How have you been?

[genevievemd]

6 for E and G and 19 and 30 for B and N (combined or separate you choose 😘)

A Kiss of Relief

Book: Open Heart (Bk 2, Ch 11) Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Genevieve McClure) Word Count: 339 Rating: T Category: Angsty Fluff Trope(s):

Summary: Ethan gives in to his desires once Gen is free from the toxin. 

Warnings: none

A/N: Not me writing another thing for ch 11... but like this prompt was meant for it. 

(tags under readmore)

Sweet Affectionate Moments Prompts

His arms wrap around her, holding Genevieve against him as tightly as he dares. Feeling her tears mingle with his own in the somewhat empty hallway. 

The last twenty-four hours have been the most agonizing of his life. Proving to Ethan once and for all that Gen had become so much more than his resident, his friend. She was the love of his life, even if it was too soon to admit it to anyone but himself. 

The reset, the distance, his dimwitted convictions, none of it mattered anymore. 

The only thing that mattered now was finding a way to be with her, completely. 

Ethan pulls back, feeling eternally grateful when his rookie looks up at him with hopeful, joyful, green eyes. Their shared smiles saying more than words ever could. 

Taking a breath, he looks up and down the hallway, cataloguing the few nurses still moving about the floor. Taking down hazmat signs and restriction tape. Without giving himself a moment to overthink, Ethan moves his hands to her arms, gently walking then back into the room and away from prying eyes. 

“What are you doing?” Gen looks up at him again, whispering in confusion.

“I need to make sure we don’t have an audience.” 

“For what?” 

Slowly, Ethan cradles her face in his hands, the cool touch of her skin so soothing it brings tears to his eyes. He dips down, delicately pressing his lips to hers. Both sighing in relief at the sensation of kissing again. 

Something he hasn’t done since the asinine softball game against Mass Kenmore weeks ago. And something he hasn’t stopped thinking about since. 

Before they get carried away, Ethan pulls back. Eyes closing and resting his forehead against her own. 

“Let’s get you to a new room.” 

“Okay.” Her voice still stays at a whisper, as if she’s afraid to break whatever spell he’s been cast under.

But it would never be broken, and Ethan fully intends of losing himself completely to her enchantment the moment she’s released from the hospital.

A/N: Short and Sweet

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[jamespotterthefirst]

Most Beautiful (Ethan x MC)

Book: Open Heart Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x f!MC  (Dr. Lilac Allende) Word count: 600 Summary: Their first morning together. Set after the events of Ch. 15, Book 1 Warning: Alluded adult content 

Prompt: #48. “You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”   50 Ways to Say “I Love You” prompts

Ethan tore his eyes away from his bedroom ceiling as she stirred next to him. Halfway between sleep and consciousness, she mumbled something against his chest and he grinned, grateful she was still half asleep and unable to see. Her warm hand settled on his chest, right above his beating heart. It was a wonder that its fierce rhythm, pounding against his skin like a drum, was not enough to jolt her awake.

 It was the first time they awoke together, after a long night (and morning) of getting lost in one another. The blissful hours spent worshiping every inch of her body would remain embossed in his mind for the rest of his days, he was sure of it. Now, in the pale gray light of the dawn, the reality of their situation started to slowly settle into place like a thick, suffocating fog. 

Despite how lost to the world they had been only hours prior, there would still be a trial. The fate of the career she had worked so hard to attain would be decided soon. And regardless of her loving reassurances, Ethan still felt responsible. If he hadn't failed her… If he hadn't fallen in love with her… None of this would have happened. 

Yet, his stomach swooped when her bare body scooped closer to his, seeking the comfort that was hers and always would be. Feeling selfish, his eyes hungrily fell on her peaceful, sleeping face. He traced every detail from the graceful slope of her nose, to the rosy pout of her lips—lips that were currently curling into a sleepy smile. 

“I can feel you staring, you know.” Her voice was thick with sleep. 

Ethan laughed softly, unabashed at being caught. She opened her eyes to peer up at him, only to beam and join in on his amusement. 

“Good morning,” she said, sitting up on the bed. Ethan missed the warmth of her body at once. 

“Good morning,” he replied, still admiring how lovely she looked by morning light. This had become his favorite way of seeing her. 

Lilac, on the other hand, must've guessed where his thoughts were because she blushed and jumped out of bed in a haste, pulling the sheets to cover her body. She stopped in front of the mirror mounted above his dresser and groaned when she took in her reflection. 

“Oh God, I look like a mess.” 

Her fingers moved to comb out the messy knots of her hair. It was a shame because it was the sexiest part about her current appearance. Ethan was behind her in seconds, his arms embracing her from behind, his fingers skimming the exposed skin of her thigh. 

“Why didn't you tell me I looked like this?” 

“Like what? Like you spent the whole night in my bed?” 

Lilac had no reply. Probably because he was currently distracting her by kissing the column of her neck. 

“Besides,” Ethan said in a low, husky murmur against her throat. “I was too distracted by what your mouth was doing the first time you woke me up.”

Now that he mentioned it, that occurrence was probably how her hair got into its current state. Ethan's fingers had gotten lost in the silky tendrils as she worked, slightly pulling when she had added her tongue to her movements. The mere memory had his body ready for her again. 

In the reflection, Lilac looked hazed by his kisses but still unconvinced. His hands settled on her hips as he gently spun her around to face him. 

“You,” he started, kissing her forehead, “are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Her blush deepened as she searched his eyes. When she found only unshakeable honesty there, she smiled and kissed his cheek. 

“You don't have to say that to get lucky,” she teased. 

“That's not why I'm saying it. And I'm already lucky.” To prove it, he held her tighter. 

It was her turn to kiss his neck. She made a deliberate movement to let the sheets covering her fall to the floor. “You're about to get luckier.”

****

50 Ways to Say “I Love You” prompts | Prompts Masterlist

A/N: Because in my vision, these two had multiple rounds that night (but more on that later).

This one was requested months ago. I wrote it then and never published it. I’m sorry whoever requested it. Sometimes anxiety and self-doubt are a bitch.

To be published soon:

Ethan babysitting (request)

Setting up Naveen (old request)

“Don’t move - I’ll get it for you” (request)

“You don’t have to pretend with me” (request)

WIP:

Admission (Pictagram ch 13)

By Morning Light (Part 3 of As Long as You Love Me So)

various 50 Ways to Say ILY requests

Untitled Ethan x MC sm*t 

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@choicesfanaf​ (except Bryce x MC/ Blaine x MC)

Open Heart- Ethan x f!MC Only

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Unsorted tags (Assumed Ethan x MC)

*Please message me if you want to be moved or removed <3

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@emotionalswift2,  @lion-ess24,

[schnitzelbutterfingers]

A breathless kiss prompt and I love you for Ethan x MC

Here!

Under the Satin Sheets

Book: Open Heart Pairing(s): Dr. Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Dr. Abigail "Abby” Chacko) Word Count: 700 Warning(s): implied sexual content Premise: A take on Ethan and Abby in the airplane. Set in OH Book 3 Ch. 10.

Prompt(s):

#5 from Kiss Scenarios: Breathless kisses

#1 from fluff: “I love you, baby.”

Sunlight splays through the airplane window, falling onto the white satin sheets, where two doctors are cocooned in them.

Abigail grins and tries to hide the rosy color escalating on her face due to the mellow, moist breath that Ethan is breathing against her cheek. She curls her fingers tight around the cotton fabric of her pillow.

Just like she did last night, when the man left a purple-reddish mark on her collarbone.

Abby makes a soft sound and a muffled laugh escapes past his pleasantly bruised mouth as he leans in even more. She feels him gently brushing a thumb over her chin and tilting her head to meet his eyes, lightened up in a delicious musky brown from the rays of the sun.

Ethan’s eyes are smoldering, and the young doctor feels the heat pool at the pit of her stomach, as his arms slide over her shoulders to grip the t-shirt more desperately.

“Ethan, I want you,” Abigail breathes in his ear.

In return, he gives her a pliable grin and opens his mouth to press a steamy kiss on the corner of her lips, the gentleness consuming her.

“Later. I’ve been practically pounding you yesterday. You deserve this.”

She practically melts.

Abby’s lips part to let out a petite satisfied noise when the older doctor brushes his other hand through her hair, his lips lightly grazing her chin, a firm tug at her mussed hair. She tilts his head habitually, advancing her neck to Ethan to do as he pleased.

In exchange, he lets out a grow and leans down to press his nose against Abby’s throat.

It's getting too warm.

No, the temperature has already risen above that.

She shifts a little to breath in more properly, and Ethan huffs out another chortle and accommodates himself to leave her more breathing room.

Abigail sighs and instead of looking for more space, she curls more within the warm cage in Ethan’s arms. She lays over him, and he holds her weight on his forearms and the satin sheets covering them from the world. He has always said that it was a way for him to keep her to himself. 

That he didn't want Abby to be shared with anyone, and that it was the only way that he could have her all to himself.

All to himself.

She flushes bright pink at the deep throaty moan that Ethan presses into her ear.

Gosh, that sound.

Abby closes her eyes when she feels his full lips opening to lightly press them together on her earlobe. He twists and pulls until the attending grazes his teeth against her earlobe. 

She gasps, lulling at that moment. 

Enjoying how Ethan’s robust body seemed to keep her championed. 

Loving the feel of his muscles wound tight and so secure on his grip.

Ethan moves his mouth over her jaw again before he reaches her ear, allowing Abigail to hear his rapid breathing, his destitute grunts, his zealous noises.

He seems contented when she tugs him down to have his whole weight on her. He appears to be cautious, but is more than delighted at the submitted addition and sucks on her ear eagerly, before he places butterfly kisses, sliding his lips over Abby's cheek. 

She flushes even more just thinking about how Ethan can feel her cheek turning hot.

He pauses his ministrations when Abby closes her eyes briefly. They snap open instantly, sporting pure irritation on her face. Most likely considering her, Ethan beams smugly down at her, his eyes darting over her face.

Which only causes her to flush even more.

Ethan tilts his head and reaches all over again to cup Abigail’s face. His eyes focus on the inquisitive and lust-filled ones of his lover.

A rueful smirk adorns his face when his girlfriend blinks and darken a deeper crimson, before he parts his lips and efficiently manages to capture Abby's full bottom lip between his. Ethan’s eyes do not dither, rather stare acutely into her globes.

Those ocean eyes.

The waves in them.

Abby is unable to look away and sighs deeply as her entire body relaxes and hums when Ethan pulls at her chin and darts his tongue inside her mouth, prodding it to open wider and give him a better access.

The sheets rustle as he shifts and breathes out ardently when Ethan slips his body to rest between her legs, kissing her lips and sucking on her bottom lip.

“I love you, baby,” Ethan whispers against her mouth.

She softly grins. “I love you more.”

And nothing matters anymore.

Well, except for the flight attendant’s call button, which she does not intend to press again.

From this prompt list ♥️

Author’s note: I hated how MC accidentally pressed on the call button in the private jet, okay? I was mad af-

Author’s note (2): Thank you so much for this request! Enjoyed writing this tons. I hope I did this justice :)

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@openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations

[utterlyinevitable]

hello! i hope you're well. HC request! I am replaying OH 1 and if you do the premium scene in ch 4 with ethan he stays with you to watch the baby and it says you talked through the night, could you do what they talked about there because they don't show all of their convo or could you do one where its mc under the mri machine and ethan asks the questions? i didn't know which idea to choose, either one is fine. thanks

@jamespotterthefirst has an amazing fic about Ethan asking MC MRI questions, and I honestly could not do any better. 

Ethan x MC’s Chat While Watching Baby Ethan 

“She didn’t deserve this,” Becca laments as she watches the baby intently.

“Rarely people do. Though I catch your meaning,” Ethan responds solemnly. 

They were quiet for a long while. Each of them sticking to their side of the compact loveseat of the NICU. 

“Will you stay in touch?” she finally asks. 

“I-” he has to close his mouth as he thought it over. Ethan Ramsey had never given much thought to how others fit into his life, now and future. Everything just kind of happened as it happened. 

“Suppose so.” His eyes flitted back to the nametag stuck to the incubator - Ethan Hudson. 

And something compelled him to continue, “Alma - her sister - will be here mid-morning.” 

Becca took the chance to pry a bit more. Asking questions about Dolores and his relationship with her - “friends. Only ever friends”. Fondest memories - “she wasn’t an avid cook but one month she was very adamant about not eating out. So she tried to cook a roast from scratch. She got the best ingredients and didn’t even turn the oven on. By the time I got there she was on the phone with a repair man wondering what it’s not working. Needless to say a quick lunch turned into dinner by the time we got everything cooked”. How close he is with her sisters - “we aren’t. I’ve met them a handful of times over the years. I just know what Dolores told me”. What’s going to happen to the baby? 

This isn’t just a patient this is his namesake. Becca knows how important that is even if Ethan waters down his relationship with her. Dolores must’ve meant something to him and vice versa. 

Ethan willing gave each and every one of her sly questions consideration. Couldn’t believe the words were coming out of his mouth without any brash retort towards her invasion of his privacy. For some reason he didn’t care to dwell on, he needed this. 

Over 10 years when he sent that first email he only meant to check in but Dolores was newly divorced and insisted on coffee - Ethan Ramsey never denied a good cup. It turned into more emails and a Sunday roast every couple of months to catch up. And now...  

“She sounds like a good friend,” she smiles through the sadness.  

“An excellent friend.”

They talk late into the night and into the early morning until Becca’s eyes can’t stay open any longer.

_____________________________

A/N: sorry this took a million years. also sorry it’s garbage. 

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Ethan:

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[equustenebris]

HIIIII um 3, 4, 12, 13, 18, and 21!!!! :D

Oh this is gonna get LOOONNGG y'all, so under the cut!!

3 - favorite line/scene you wrote this year

AaaaHHHHakskkssk okay this is SUCH a good question!! I have no idea where to start! 😅 Overall favorite scene I'd say iiisss.....probably Mads and Gyro on the couch in Blame Gravity chapter 5...but I'm not spoiling it. 👀 Also I'm a little more iffy on the whole scene here but for whatever reason I'm really fond of this "ten paces" line that you'll see in the next update:

Flustered and furiously blushing, Gyro began to stammer. MD silently and deliberately moved his token along the board, looking up with a devilish grin.

"I win."

But Gyro was still about ten paces and a sentence back. "I'm not -- I never said -- MD!"

4 - total number of words you wrote this year

....are we counting unfinished fic too? ..........do I have to?? |D;;;;;;;;; UM OKAY LET'S SEE....and bearing in mind my summaries and notes will count to word counts on these xD; BUT it also doesn't count scenes I've written in my planning notes so it evens out lol. Also only most of Blame Gravity ch 8 is written so far so that's why that one's so small!

Drabbles document -- 27624

Blame Gravity (ch 1-7) -- 43055

Blame Gravity (ch 8-12) -- 6384

Whumptober 2021 drabbles -- 23043

First Blame Gravity sequel -- 1960

Untitled Newton-tries-alcohol fic -- 2244

Untitled camping fic -- 3896

Arctic Blame Gravity sequel -- 1571

Untitled time travel fic -- 3845

Fifteen. Feed a Cold, Starve a Fever (separated from the rest of Whumptober because I was rewriting) -- 5124

TOTALS: ......118,746 😱 I only got into this fandom in March!

12 - favorite character to write about this year

Ohhh I think it should come as a surprise to absolutely no one that it's Mads ☺️ And of course second to that in order is Gyro, Newton, and then the surprising dark horse is Cartesius. (Though he is driving me absolutely CRAZY I still have no idea how to write the haughty bastard.)

13 - favorite writing song/artist/album of this year

OOOH so taking the opportunity to hawk my Blame Gravity and also MD/Gyro playlists again! (Blame Gravity just contains a subset of the songs on the MD/Gyro playlist)

Blame Gravity

MD/Gyro

18 - current number of wips

......NO???? AKSKSJSJ WACKY WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME???? 😭😭😭 uhhhhhmmmm...ONLY including things I've actually got something written for and not just planned or ideas...let's see..😬 NAMED FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE.

1. Blame Gravity

2. First Blame Gravity sequel

3. Arctic Blame Gravity sequel

4. Untitled Newton-tries-alcohol fic

5. Untitled camping fic

6. Untitled time travel fic

7. Four. Trust Fall

8. Seven. My Spidey-Sense is Tingling

9. Eleven. Just Keep Swimming

10. Twelve. It'll Be Fun, They Said

11. Fourteen. Under Pressure

12. Fifteen. Feed a Cold, Starve a Fever

13. Twenty-four. One Down, Two to Go

14. Twenty-seven. I'm Fine. I Prom...

15. Thirty-one. Hurt & Comfort

16. Mites

17. Baby Pictures

18. Speechless

19. Whiskey

20. Untitled Mads tries to comfort Newton fic

21. Ring

22. Nosebleed

23. Needles

24. Untitled Newton has a sibling and it's time for her to learn the history of ~the Mad Ducktor~ fic (probably abandoned, idk if I like the idea of him having a sibling anymore, but we shall see)

25. Winter Storm

26. Untitled Bill and Newton stay over fic

27. Untitled suggestive fic

28. Faking

29. Paperclip

30. Cats (but @doctor-gyro-gearloose did a much better job with this idea so this is perma abandoned and I should really remove it lol)

31. Untitled Gyro/Bill/Newton/Mads on vacation

32. Untitled Christmas fic

33. Untitled Gyro meets his baby nephew for the first time fic

34. Untitled giving Newton moving in with Gyro some history fic

35. Untitled sick Mads whining at Gyro fic

36. Untitled Gyro losing his temper at Newton fic

37. Untitled Cartesius finds out about Copernicus's secret relationship(s) fic

.....and a few various scenes that may or may not make it into other things I have planned 😳

SO 37. THE ANSWER IS 37 ARE YOU HAPPY 🤣😅😬

21 - most memorable comment/review

akskskajsbsn I literally adore EVERY SINGLE comment on anything I write SO MUCH Y'ALL DON'T EVEN KNOW, IT IS MY LIFEBLOOD 😭❤️❤️❤️ BUT one particularly significant one was @wacky-nameless-inventor-24 asking me via anon if I'd consider posting to AO3 -- because that was so sweet and made me realize that somebody actually really did like my work, so I started posting on AO3 and it upped my writing and sharing a TON -- so thank you so much Wacky!! 😭❤️

[verucagloop]

Bullied Berries taste best!