#changesont

[trash-on-t-blog]

almost 6 months on T now: I forgot to update because nothing really changed in the last few weeks. I still got the problem with my itchy skin and I am still taking meds because of it. My Doc who gives me the T wanted me to stop taking it for 3 Months but I didn't wanted to. He didn't even listen to my problem and just said that it's from the T and that i could die if i continue taking it and that i just should go home, just to make me stop wasting his time (This guy is from f*cking hell and doesn't like/understand trans people at all.. for all german trans-people out there who happen to live in cologne: Do not ever go to Dr.Kaulen). Also: not T related but I finally officially changed my Name and Gender on my documents and ID and stuff like that. Another thing that other people noticed is that i am way more agressive than i was in the last few months.. i myself didn't notice that at all, so i'm not sure if i'm able to change this and i'm scared to ruin my friendships.

[trash-on-t-blog]

about 3,5 months on T now: my voice keeps dropping and people notice. I have to shave my face once or twice a week now. The problem with my itchy skin got worse.. I've got "hives/urticaria"-like symptoms, jet this is not the case because given medication isn't effective- so my doc is sure that this is somehow the cause of T. I also got more hair on my legs and my skin got worse again, especially on my back and my shoulders. Apart from this i don't really notice anything new.

[trash-on-t-blog]

about 2 months on T now: My voice dropped a bit, but most of the time it still sounds feminine to me. Had to shave my chin and upper lip because the hair annoyed me. Also, after walking some longer distances, my legs hurt so much that i think i may fall because i can't stand on them any longer- very awful. I think it's because of muscle growth.. I'm also more agressive than I was before T. Also when i start sweating my body starts to itch a lot.. and i'm physically not able to cry anymore, maybe 2-3 tears but that's all.. Even if i want to- i can't. But besides that, I don't notice any new changes.

[trash-on-t-blog]

1 Month (and a few days) on T now: Noticed some new hair at my chin and my face got more oily than it already was. Got a little bit of bottomgrowth and my sex drive is as high as it never was before. I think my voice got a little bit deeper, but i'm not sure about that. And I also stretch a LOT.

[trans-shadowolf]

September 2015 vs. July 2017 (13 months on T) ____________________________________ I get pissed off/frustrated at my body sometimes, thinking I never gonna get to the point where I'm actually pleased with it. But then I compare pictures and I can see so much difference it's crazy. The one on the left was taken for my driving license application, whilst the right one was just a few days ago (needed for my job). Also, in the oldest pic I had actually drawn my mustache on so I wouldn't get misgendered. Nowadays the sole shape of my face is normally enough for people to identify me as a male. ____________________________________ #trusttheprocess #ftm #ftmuk #transformation #transgender #transmasculine #transman #transboy #transguy #oneyearonT #hrt #testosterone #transisbeautiful #thisiswhattranslookslike #gay #queer #growingup #mytransition #myjourney #selfmade #selfmademan #transandproud #vitaminT #changesonT #transpride #beforeandaftert #gaycute #handsome #selflove #flashbackfriday #100happydays #day28 (at Kilburn, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

First day of work. Got paid to: - share one of my guilty pleasures ✔️ - partecipate in team building activities ✔️ - laugh my ass off watching role play situations ✔️ - have a lunch break of an hour spent revising for my Computer Science interview on Friday ✔️ - eat basically the whole menu of the place whilst one of the founders explained the dishes ✔️ Plus, nobody misgendered me and I felt really comfortable throughout the day, even managing to make small conversation instead of being my usual wallflower. I really think I've picked the best company to work for! 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #elevenmonths #hrt #mytransition #growingup #gaycute #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #handsome #queer #selfmade #selfmademan #ftmuk #ftmitalia #mentalhealth #recovery #itgetsbetter #trusttheprocess #2017goals #100happydays #day20 (at MEATliquor)

[trans-shadowolf]

Today I'm ten months on T, so here's a #transformationtuesday from only one year ago! Sometimes it's hard to believe that the picture on the left was taken only in March 2016. It honestly feels like a lifetime ago, and not just because of T but because so much has happened in the last year. As my appearance begun changing, so did everything else, to the point that I myself am amazed of just how much I've grown up in these last ten months, and all thanks to a (tiny?) hormone which I was missing from birth. If you're a transgender person who wants to start T and have days when you get too annoyed with yourself and beat yourself up, know that it is gonna change even if you don't think it's possible. Have a little faith and you'll be rewarded. 💉 Follow me! • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #ftmuk #transformation #transgender #transmasculine #transman #transboy #transguy #transmenofig #hrt #testosterone #transisbeautiful #thisiswhattranslookslike #gay #queer #growingup #mytransition #myjourney #selfmade #selfmademan #transandproud #vitaminT #changesonT #transpride #beforeandaftert #gaycute #handsome #selflove #staypositive #itgetsbetter #mentalhealth #recovery #100happydays #day14 (at Kilburn, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

Voice comparison video: one, three, five, seven and nine months on T. (In which I'm smiling on camera for the first time!) 💉 Follow me! • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #ftmuk #transformation #transgender #transmasculine #transman #transboy #transguy #voicecomparison #ninemonthsonT #hrt #testosterone #transisbeautiful #thisiswhattranslookslike #gay #queer #growingup #mytransition #myjourney #selfmade #selfmademan #transandproud #vitaminT #changesonT #transpride #beforeandaftert #gaycute #handsome #selflove #100happydays #day10 (at Kilburn, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

I was working out but the light was right so I stopped to take a selfie. 👌🏽 • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #ninemonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queer #selfmade #selfmademan #ftmuk #ftmitalia #mentalhealth #ednos #recovery #getbetter #shadowolf19 #motivation #motivational #itgetsbetter #trusttheprocess #2017goals (at Kilburn, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

Managed to run 5K for the first time ever in my life. I still can't believe how I achieved this in only seven weeks. So I decided to take a selfie to commemorate the moment and to remind myself that I've got this, a little step at a time. 💪🏽 • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💪🏽 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #ninemonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queer #selfmade #selfmademan #ftmuk #ftmitalia #mentalhealth #ednos #recovery #getbetter #shadowolf19 #motivation #motivational #itgetsbetter #trusttheprocess #2017goals #100happydays #day9 (at Gladstone Park, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

Sometimes it's good to remind one self about the many challenges won in order to feel positive. I've been feeling quite positive lately: in the last three weeks I've been exercising at least five times a week, alternating climbing with cardio + core exercises, plus I've taken up Slimming World for the last couple of weeks. One of my New Year's resolutions was to lose the weight T had caused me to put on and get fit in anticipation of top surgery later this year. Admittedly, I'm not the best at following up the things I promise on the 1st of January, but this year, so far, I did it, and I'm very pleased with the results. I'm down 1.4 kilos already, but, for the first time in AGES, I feel genuinely positive towards life and I have the best relationship with food I've ever had since going through puberty. In the left picture, I was going to my first appointment at GenderCare, I was stressed as hell about all aspects of my life and I was more or less starving myself. Today, I follow a healthy diet, accept that my body needs food even if I don't think I deserve it and I'm working towards getting a part time job to help me save up for top surgery. The lesson I'm learning day by day is to be patient and trust the process: everything happens for a reason even if I can't find one at first. Everything will turn out alright. 💉 • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #eightmonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queer #selfmade #selfmademan #ftmuk #ftmitalia #mentalhealth #ednos #recovery #getbetter #shadowolf19 #motivation #motivational #itgetsbetter #trusttheprocess #2017goals #100happydays #day3 (at Kilburn, London)

[trans-shadowolf]

Eight months on T voice comparison! This whole months has seen a return of the "chocked voice", which is what I call that phenomenon when I don't know if anything is gonna come out of my mouth when I talk or not 😂 In the past this has coincided with an eventual drop of my voice, so here's to hoping that this is gonna be the case now too 😁 💉 • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #ftmuk #transformation #transgender #transmasculine #transman #transboy #transguy #voicecomparison #eightmonthsonT #hrt #testosterone #transisbeautiful #thisiswhattranslookslike #gay #queer #gayboy #growingup #mytransition #myjourney #selfmade #selfmademan #transandproud #vitaminT #changesonT #transpride #beforeandaftet

[trans-shadowolf]

When she jumps on your lap uninvited ❤️ 💉 • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #sevenmonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queerboy #gayboy #queer #panromantic #selfmade #selfmademan #pugs #puglove #puglife #pugsofinstagram #pugstagram #climbing #ftmuk #ftmitalia (at The Castle Climbing Centre)

[trans-shadowolf]

My seven months on T video is now up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0XAqkpt1gU. This one is mainly focused on my decision to switch from gel (Testim) to injections (Sustanon) and my reasons for this choice. It might be useful if you're pre-T and are currently weighing your options, or if you're on T and considering switching yourself. Feel free to comment/subscribe/ask me questions either on here or on YouTube. Thanks for all of your support! 💉 Follow me! • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #testim #tgel #sustanon #sevenmonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queerboy #gayboy #queer #demisexual #demisexualpride #panromantic #transformation #selfmade #selfmademan #shadowolf19

[trans-shadowolf]

My seven months on T video is now up on my channel. This one is mainly focused on my decision to switch from gel (Testim) to injections (Sustanon) and my reasons for this choice. It might be useful if you're pre-T and are currently weighing your options, or if you're on T and considering switching yourself. Feel free to comment/subscribe/ask me questions either on here or on YouTube. Thanks for all of your support! 💉 Follow me! • Facebook: /diariodiunftm • Twitter: @Shadowolf19 • YouTube: link in bio 💉 #ftm #transandproud #transboy #transman #transmasculine #transguy #thisiswhattranslookslike #transisbeautiful #testim #tgel #sustanon #sevenmonths #hrt #mytransition #growingupgay #growingup #gaycute #gay #changesonT #testosterone #vitaminT #lgbt #prettyboy #handsome #queerboy #gayboy #queer #demisexual #demisexualpride #panromantic #transformation #selfmade #selfmademan #shadowolf19